#the writers will Not do this right?? RIGHT????? they fuckin CANT

[uwooyoungs]

OH MARISOL IS BONESS

[wingsofhcpe]

one of those fifty things was a classist af post about how fanfic writers can't actually write for shit, yes all of them apparently bc they aren't educated in proper literary devices or whatever.

are you fucking hearing yourself

[nvrsaidiwasinurcloset]

okay hi just a warning rq my autocorrect is off bc it autocorrected my friend’s name to fuckin malayalam on accident. i dont like autocorrect.

ANYWAY! ive been listening to my lovely olivia rodrigo lately, specifically her new song obsessed. i wanted to know if you could make a fic with Ethan x fem! reader where readers bitchy friend has this ex (Ethan) and she made him out to be a real dick. like, manipulating and everything.

reader eventually meets him and it turns out that she remembers… a lot about him considering her friend is a constant yapper and cant shut up about him. Ethan actually turns out to be a real cutie patootie and could literally never hurt anyone.

a few days later theyd meet again at some club or party maybe where they end up hitting it off… a little too well.. yeah so she ends up in his bed (smut part, very dom ethan plspls 😛😛). they could be talking about something really random and then reader brings up how her friend basically completely lied about him and said he was a piece of shit when he really wasnt. like a realllll fluffy end before a small cliffhanger thats never gonna get finished where her friend ends up finding out and texting her.

so sorry if thats too long or confusing idk but i actually love your work so much im lowkey your #1 fan. 😍😍😍

HELLO! I switched this up a little, I hope that's okay! 💕

Also, I fucking loved the 'leave it on a cliffhanger part that won't get finished' because WHY IS THAT WHAT I DO lmao

Obsessed - Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader - Part 1

This contains SMUT - Minors DNI

Part 2

Summary: Your friend told you horrible lies about her ex-boyfriend, and once you get to know him, you realize he's not the monster she made him out to be.

Contains: Mentions of a toxic relationship, Dom-ish cocky Ethan, rough-ish sex, oral - f receiving, p in v, fluff (If I missed anything, PLEASE let me know. I'm sleep deprived atm)

A/N: This was the one that pulled me out of my writers block, lmao. It's still not where I want it to be, but I'm TRYING. I'll try to post more this week, but I will be busy so bear with me haha.

You didn’t know Ethan Landry, but you knew you didn’t like him. He used to date one of your friends, and after hearing all the horrible things he’d said and done during their relationship, you thought he was really scummy.

They dated in high school and couldn’t get enough of each other, so they wanted to go to the same college. They broke up right before freshman year started, and after almost a year, she still talked about him every chance she got. She’d tell you how controlling he was. The things he’d call her when he was mad. How he cheated on her. You couldn’t believe that she stayed in the relationship for as long as she did, because she never had anything good to say, except that she loved him.

You’d seen pictures of him, and after walking into one of your classes at the start of the new semester, you saw him in person for the first time. He was so shy as he took his seat in the lecture hall, some of the girls making their little comments about the rumors they’d heard about him. He didn’t seem like the type that would do the things your friend said, but maybe he was just really good at playing innocent. All you knew was that you needed to keep your distance from him.

When you met up with your friend later that day for lunch, you didn’t know if you wanted to bring up Ethan being in the same class as you, but once she brought him up, you decided to tell her.

“Speaking of Ethan…I saw him today,” you said, before taking a bite of your food. Her face dropped as she looked at you.

“Where did you see him?” she questioned. You explained that you saw him in one of your new classes, and she rolled her eyes. “Can you believe he still tries to text me?”

“What I can’t believe is that you haven’t blocked him,” you said, “I know I’d hate to see someone that treated me like shit’s name pop up on my phone.”

She started to giggle as you curiously stared at her. “I have him saved in my phone as ‘Tall loser with a small dick’, so I laugh every time he does text me.”

“That’s not toxic at all,” you said, as you started to think about what she’d said. “Wait, he treated you as bad as he did and has a small dick? What the fuck were you thinking?”

“All he had going for him was that he was cute,” she said, “But seriously, if I were you, I’d stay away from him.”

“Oh, please. Like I’d even want to be near him.”

Your morning wasn’t going as expected. You slept through all of your alarms; you didn’t have time to stop for coffee. You didn’t think your day could get any worse, until you walked into class and noticed the only empty seat available was beside Ethan. You took a deep breath before you walked over and sat down. Once you reached into your backpack, you realized that your laptop wasn’t there. You were in such a hurry when you ran out of your dorm and didn’t even think to grab it.

“Shit,” you whispered, “I’m so stupid.”

“Here,” Ethan said, passing you a notebook and a pen. You curiously looked at him as he offered a weak smile. “I always keep an extra notebook, just in case.”

“Thanks,” you said, a half-smile playing on your lips.

Once class started, you were taking your notes, but you kept glancing over to Ethan. He was so focused on typing that he didn’t notice, but you couldn’t help but wonder if everything your friend told you was true. At that moment, he didn’t seem like a jerk. Then again, he had only spoken a handful of words to you.

Ethan was aware of all the things that were said about him. He hoped that after a few weeks it all would’ve blown over, but once you have an angry ex-girlfriend paint you as some horrible, emotionally abusive asshole, it’s hard to come back from that. He knew that it was best for him to just keep his head down until he was able to transfer to a different school, where no one knew who he was. He was miserable at Blackmore, and he really had no reason to stick around, aside from the few friends he’d made.

After class was over, you tore the pages of notes you’d taken from the notebook to give it back to Ethan.

“Thanks again,” you said, as you handed it back to him.

“You’re welcome,” he said, shoving it back in his backpack. “I thought about just emailing you my notes, but I didn’t know if you’d want that.”

“You’re telling me I didn’t have to spend the last hour trying to write that fast?” you asked, as he flashed you a sweet, genuine smile. “Why wouldn’t someone want that?”

“I don’t know, maybe it’s because most people here hate me,” he said, sliding the straps of his backpack over his shoulders. “You’ve probably heard things about me.”

“Yeah…are they true?” you asked, as he shook his head.

“You’re the first person that’s asked me that. Everyone else just assumes everything is true,” he sighed, “But no, I’m not a bad person.”

You started to feel so guilty. You’d said plenty of bad things about him, but you only heard one side of the story. With your friends’ story changing so many times, getting more dramatic each time she told it, you were starting to realize that it was all bullshit. You still didn’t know exactly what happened, but you were curious to know what the truth was.

“You okay?” Ethan asked, noticing that you were lost in thought as you stood in front of him.

“I’m friends with your ex,” you said, as his smile slowly fell. “What’s the real story?”

He sat back down in his seat as the other students piled out of the room. You sat beside him as you waited for him to speak.

“I really loved her…but she was just so controlling. Then she cheated on me when she went to the beach with her family. I didn’t find out about that until right before we started college,” he said, looking over to you. “She was pissed that I broke up with her, then all these horrible things about me started going around.”

“That’s fucked up,” you said, as he nodded.

“Yeah, she’s still been trying to text me. I finally blocked her a few days ago.”

“Wait, she said you’ve been trying to text her,” you said, his eyes growing wide at your words.

“Her number’s been deleted from my phone for months. I have no interest in talking to her,” he said, “I know this must be weird for you since you are her friend, but I think it’s cool that you wanted to hear me out.”

“Well, I feel like I need to apologize…I’ve said some things about you that weren’t true.”

“She’s a good liar. She has almost the entire school hating me so it doesn’t surprise me that her friend does, too,” he said, as he stood back up.

“I don’t hate you,” you said, smiling at him. “I don’t know if you’d want to, and I know she’d kill me, but if you ever want to hang out sometime, let me know.”

“I’d like that.”

Ethan was kicking himself for not asking you for your number, or shit, even your social media so he could DM you. He thought you were beautiful, but he knew that hoping for a chance with you would be a reach. He really just needed more people in his life that believed him to make the time he still had at the university more enjoyable.

Your friend begged you to come to a random frat party that you didn’t feel like going to in the first place. After your talk with Ethan, you weren’t even sure you wanted to be around her. You still went, and after searching for her for almost an hour, you checked your phone to see a message from her that she wasn’t coming, and that she ran into one of the guys she’d been hooking up with on the way to the party.

“Why the fuck am I even here?” you said to yourself as you locked your phone and slid it into the back pocket of your jeans.

“Hopefully to hang out with me, if your offer’s still good,” you heard from behind you, recognizing Ethan’s voice.

“Hey,” you said as you turned to face him. “I didn’t expect to see the most hated man on campus here.”

“My roommate told me that if I stayed in my dorm tonight, he’d throw my Xbox out the window,” he said, glancing over to the muscular guy that was watching Ethan talk to you.

“Ah, so you were threatened into being social,” you said, as he started to laugh.

“I guess you could say that. Do you want a drink?”

“Sure.”

Ethan wasn’t much of a drinker; you could tell by the sour look on his face every time he took a sip. It gave him a little confidence though, as the two of you talked and got to know each other a little better.

“I don’t think I can drink this anymore,” he said, sitting the cup down on a table. You sat yours down too, and as soon as you did, someone bumped into you, shoving you into Ethan.

“Shit, I’m sorry,” you said, looking up at him. Your chest was pressed closely against his, his hands on your hips from catching you.

“Don’t be sorry,” he said, “You can stay this close to me all night, if you want.”

“Are you always this smooth? Or is it the alcohol?” you questioned as he smirked at you.

“I’m only buzzed,” he said, before he leaned down, placing his lips on yours.

Chad was still watching Ethan from afar, cheering and thrusting his fist in the air once he saw Ethan kiss you. He started to laugh against your lips before he pulled away to stare daggers through his roommate for interrupting the moment.

“I can’t take him anywhere,” Ethan said, as you smiled at him.

“We could go somewhere more private,” you suggested, as he took your hand in his.

“Want to go back to my dorm? He’ll be here for a while so I know we can talk without being interrupted.”

“Sure!”

Once you made it back to Ethan’s dorm, you were starting to think that he really did just want to talk. You enjoyed listening to him, though. He was telling you about all his hobbies and interests, and you were telling him yours. You started to glance around his side of the dorm room, noticing the cliché, dorky things you’d expect to see.

“Nice Star Wars poster, nerd,” you joked, as he smirked at you.

“Oh, I’m a nerd?” he said, as he nudged you back on his bed. He was hovering over you, his mouth inches from yours. The sexual tension got so thick as his eyes looked into yours, his hand rubbing your hip.

“Mhm,” you said, the corner of your bottom lip in between your teeth. “A hot nerd.”

He felt his cheeks start to heat up, and he really didn’t want you to notice, so he leaned down to finally connect his lips to yours. It didn’t take long for the kiss to get more intense, his tongue brushing across your bottom lip. You let him deepen the kiss, his tongue moving with yours as his hands started to roam. You whimpered into the kiss once his hand squeezed your thigh, your hips started to squirm underneath him.

He pulled away but still stayed close so the two of you could catch your breath. You were reading each other’s faces, and it was obvious that you both wanted more.

“How far do you want this to go?” he asked, his breathing still heavy as his eyes looked into yours.

“As far as you want,” you said, your sweet tone making him groan.

“That’s not what I asked you,” he said, as he leaned back down to kiss your neck. His curls were tickling you, but the only reaction you had were the soft moans slipping past your lips from how well his mouth moved. His hips were rutting into yours, showing you how hard he was for you.

“I want you to fuck me,” you said, as he pulled away to look at you.

“You sure?”

“Mhm.”

Ethan was a little, well, very eager. He got you undressed in what felt like seconds, leaving you in just your panties. Once he stripped down to just his boxers, you got a little curious. You glanced down to see his hard cock straining against the fabric, and started to laugh to yourself, your gaze going to the ceiling.

“What’s funny?” he asked, as he hovered back over you to take one of your nipples in his mouth. Your laughing stopped, a gasp slipping out when he started to suck. “I asked you a question,” he teased, before moving to the other side.

“She really does lie about everything,” you said, as his tongue swirled. “She said you had a small dick.”

He started to laugh against you, before he pulled back. “That’s funny, because she couldn’t take it.”

“I can,” you said, his smile turning to a smirk as his hand trailed down your body to rub you over your panties.

“We’ll see about that,” he said, as he moved lower down the bed to position himself between your thighs.

He slid your panties down your legs, before running his fingers over your wet pussy. Your eyes stayed on him, your bottom lip in between your teeth as he teased you. Your anticipation just kept building as he moved down the bed, positioning himself in between your thighs. He leaned in, slipping his tongue inside your entrance.

He was sloppily eating you out, his head moving from side to side. His arms hooked under your thighs to pull you as close to his face as he could as your hands went to his hair.

“So good,” you whimpered, your breathing getting faster as he worked you closer to your orgasm.

He slid his tongue out of you to focus on your clit, quickly replacing it with two of his fingers. Your back was arching off the bed as he moved his arm back and forth, applying as much pressure as he could to that spongy spot inside you as he sucked on your swollen bundle of nerves.

“You’re gonna make me cum,” you babbled, as he started to chuckle with your clit in his mouth.

That was all it took for your legs to start shaking and your grip on his hair getting even tighter. Once your pussy started to clench around him, he slowed his fingers to a slow roll, not wanting to overstimulate you. His tongue gently licked your clit as he worked you through it, your whimpers getting softer as you came down from your high.

“That was the best orgasm I’ve ever had,” you admitted through your shaky breathing. Ethan started to laugh a little as you looked at him, your eyes hazy. “What?”

“Just wait until I’m inside you,” he cockily said, “You still confident that you can handle it?”

“I know I can,” you said, your legs instinctively spreading wide for him as his fingertips ran up your thigh.

“What are you going to do when no one else can make you feel as good as I do?” he questioned, as one of his fingers started to rub circles on your clit.

“I guess I’d have to keep you around then,” you said, as he shook his head.

“You’d only have me until summer starts,” he said, his finger moving faster. “I’m transferring to a different school after this year.”

“No, you’re not..fuck. I’ll convince you to stay,” you said, relaxing into the bed as he teased you.

Ethan pulled his hand away from your pussy before he slid his boxers off. He crawled back on top of you and reached over to his bedside table to grab a condom.

“I might let you convince me,” he said, as he lined up with your entrance. You tensed up a little because you knew how big he was. “Relax, baby.”

You did as he said, taking a deep breath as he inched his way inside of you. You were moaning as he stretched you out, and when you thought he was all the way in, he just kept going.

“Oh fuck,” you whimpered, feeling so full as he finally came to a stop, wanting to give you plenty of time to adjust. “Told you..Fuck, I told you I could take it,” you said, already struggling to speak.

“Don’t get cocky,” he said, your mouth falling open as he started to move. “I’m going to ruin this pussy.”

“Ruin it,” you said, challenging him as your lusty, hooded eyes connected with his.

It took everything in Ethan to not immediately start pounding into you, but he didn’t want to hurt you. He started slow, your eyebrows already furrowing together, low moans slipping past your lips. The head of his cock hit that special spot every single time, but you needed more. He sped up a little as your legs wrapped around him, your hands gripped tightly around his biceps.

“Maybe you can take it,” he said, his breathing getting heavier. “Can I go faster?”

“Yes,” you whimpered, as his hips moved quicker.

Your brain was starting to turn to mush, the babbles slipping past your lips making absolutely no sense. The only thing your mind could process in that moment was how good Ethan was making you feel. He thought you were adorable, already so cock drunk, and he wasn’t even close to being done with you yet. He kept his pace, but occasionally thrust a little harder to see if you could take it, the loud moans slipping past your lips as your nails started to dig into his arms letting him know that you could.

He angled your hips to go even deeper. His pace was a little slow as he made sure you were okay. Your eyes were pleading with him to go faster, because you knew the words weren’t going to come out of your mouth. It was getting so hard for him to hold back, so he finally let go. He started to pound into you so hard that your skin was tingling, all the nerves in your body on edge. Your toes were curling as he slammed into your g-spot, your whimpers turning to cries as you felt your orgasm starting to build. It was hard for you to keep your eyes open, and you were sure Ethan was going to have your nail marks on his arms forever with how hard you were squeezing him.

“Fuck,” was the only word you were able to get out, your legs wrapping tightly around him as your body started to involuntarily jolt. Ethan was sure that everyone in the surrounding dorm rooms knew what was happening, because you were being so loud. He wasn’t letting up though. He loved that he was making you feel that good.

It only took a few more deep thrusts before your entire body started to tremble, loud whines flooding out of your mouth as the wave of euphoria washed over you. He chased his own orgasm as he fucked you through it, your pussy clenching him so tight that he was moaning himself.

“I’m almost there, baby,” he said, a slight rasp in his voice from all the panting he’d been doing.

You went limp, your grip on his arms and your legs around his waist relaxing as his hips started to falter, a loud groan slipping past his lips as he released into the condom.

He took a minute to catch his breath before he slid out of you. His abs were burning and his arms were sore from your nails, but he quickly got up to take the condom off so he could take care of you.

He crawled in the bed next to you as you adjusted to lay your head on his chest, still so fucked out that it was hard to process your thoughts. Ethan just held you close, his hands softly rubbing over your bare back as you relaxed into his touches.

“You’re okay, right?” he asked, after a few minutes of you not saying anything. You lazily nodded as your hand moved to rub across his chest.

You laid there in silence as you started to think about what’d just happened. You knew your friend was going to be pissed if she ever found out, but did that even matter? She made almost the entire university hate Ethan for things he never did, and it made you sad that he felt like he needed to switch to a different school so he wouldn’t have to deal with it anymore.

“So…” you finally said, “How can I convince you to stay?”

He let out a nervous laugh, not knowing the best way to respond. “I can’t take people talking about me the way they do anymore.”

“Even if I convince everyone that it was all lies?” you questioned, your tone playful as you angled your head to look at him. “I think it’d be awful for you to leave because of her. You could miss out on someone that would treat you right.”

“Someone like you?” he questioned as he looked down at you. You nodded, before he leaned down to kiss you. “You’re good at this whole convincing thing.”

“Does that mean you’ll stay?” you asked, smiling as you sat up to look at him.

“Yeah, as long as you don’t break my heart,” he said, wrapping his arms around you to pull you back down to his chest.

“I won’t.”

You stayed in Ethan’s bed for a couple hours, making plans for all the dates he wanted to take you on. It felt like you’d known him for way longer than just a few days, the two of you having an instant connection. You hated to pull away from him, but you knew you needed to get dressed before his roommate got home.

“It’s late, can I walk you back to your dorm?” he asked, as he started to put his clothes back on.

“I can’t believe I thought you were this horrible monster. You’re so sweet,” you said, as he smiled at you. “Yeah, you can walk me home.”

Ethan walked you to the front door of your building, pulling you into a gentle kiss before he pulled away.

“I’ll text you,” he said, as he started to back away.

“Yeah, let me know when you make it back to your dorm, please,” you said, as he nodded.

When you made it upstairs and got settled into your bed, you heard your phone vibrate as it charged on your bedside table. You grabbed it and saw a goodnight message from Ethan, a huge smile on your face as you responded to him. You were so exhausted from the time you’d spend with him, and you soon felt yourself start to doze off. You heard your phone buzz again, your eyes lazily opening to see if it was Ethan. You took a deep breath once you read the message that was sent to you.

‘Why the fuck were you kissing Ethan at that party?’

[mv1simp]

I am in ur walls

I have come to raise the idea of, and hear me out, Max x PR officer reader. I’m just gonna yap now, hear me out

Like can you imagine Max going through his hoe phase and reader having to clean up his image, and she’s just fondly like UGH MAX. Part of her is like blehhhhh because more work, but the bigger part of her is like ✨jealous✨

And then at some point she makes an offhand comment like if you want to be a whore, can you at LEAST not make more work for me????

Cue Max and her starting to be a thing, and him trying to rile her up enough to get her to be their own PR issue just for shits and giggles and he gets quite risque and horny and her resistance to it just turns him on even more until he’s saying and doing the filthiest shit in the middle of the paddock just to get her to crack——

Also can you imagine how hilarious it would be if they get caught and GP is like NOT YOU TOO READER LIKE DOES HE HAVE A MAGIC DICK OR SMTH——

WELCOME TO MY WALLS!!! This idea HAS ME ahahahah see I was always a crackfic writer at age 12 on wattpad, its time to remerge into the light with this prompt

Like you know how max is so millennial coded. And she’s actually the same age as him but he thinks she’s older cause she’s always looking so stressed. And she like um that’s cause you’re a fuckin manwhore max?!? Have you thought about celibacy for a hot second? And as they become better friends she demands he hand over his card so she can invest in some good skincare

(max also suggests maybe she needs to get dicked down good, he’s happy to provide that if she wants or? 🤭🤭)

But anyways she’s pumping out Gen z memes left right and centre to distract the masses from his slut era and he’s always like wdym “i have zero rizz and am a bitchless cat dad”?? I know memes?? Remember hawk thua-

ALSO WHENEVER HE REALLY TRIES TO RILE HER UP ON THE PADDOCK AND SHE CANT DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT SHE MAKES HIM DO THE MOST ANNOYING SOCIAL MEDIA CHALLENGES TO GET BACK AT HIM like imagine her making him do a kiss marry kill with the drivers and he’s like 😑😑 and everyone’s like babes come here we got max Verstappen saying he’d kiss Alonso, marry charles and kill George before GTA 2024

ALSO I’m jumping the gun but after he ✨seduces her ✨ there’s so much scope for the classic shenanigans. Accidentally wearing shirts inside out. Accidentally wearing each others Redbull shirt and she could get away with oversized style but everyone’s like “max why tf are u wearing a crop top”. (GP knows. He knows and he can’t look either of you in the eye. Everyone has started asking why he loudly announces himself and waits 10 seconds before walking around the corners of the Redbull garage and he’s like…no reason. But his face is one of a man who has seen many, many things)

Anyway you have ban any contact of sexual nature after that incident that you have dubbed CropTopGate. But obviosuly that just makes max even more feral cause we know how competitive he is 😼

ALSO he’s notorious for going through personal managers as well but once you two start getting tension but you’re still all like “nooo 6 foot driver millionaires aren’t my type okayyyy 🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️”

So he demands that you be promoted to his personal events manager as well. To which you are adamantly like NO knowing what this means for your poor self control but Christian Horner is like yes maxie boo 🥰 so now you also accompany max to all his lil modelling gigs, looking anywhere but at him while he stands shirtless next to you with a cocky grin.

OR LIKE IMAGINE HE AND A MODEL ARE DOING AN ADVERTISEMENT TOGETHER LIKE ONE OF THOSE SEXY PERFUME ONES. AND DURING A BREAK THE PHOTOGRAPHER NOTICES YOU AND MAX TALKING TOGETHER

and he’s like i don’t care who you are get over here NOW this sexual chemistry is insane so you end up in a very compromising pose up against max verstappen, F1 driver, cat dad, and certified slut while he’s whispering dirty things in your ear

(He catches on quick that you really likes it when he speaks Dutch, good thing you can’t understand it cause he’s just reciting his grocery list and enjoying watching you blush and squeeze your legs together)

very cute idea hehe thank you for messaging!! I LIVE for some sexual tension, reader is a better woman than me for trying to resist the advances of max 😮‍💨😮‍💨

[whiskey-tango-matcha]

Chatterbox (M, cold, 'drabble')

A little prompt-based fluff for you guys :) Reed and Greyson go out to dinner, but Reed realizes something is up when Greyson won't shut tf up lol. I'm loving writing this relationship, I can't lie, so sorry if it's too much Reed and Greyson lately - I'll get back to my other guys soon!

1.6K words (just a tiny lil blip of a story haha) CW: Male snz, coughing, fever, contagion mention. Hope you like it :)

Chatterbox

Reed looked down at his phone as he waited on Greyson, rereading the stream-of-consciousness texts his boyfriend had sent throughout the day.

Greyson

1:42PM

sooo pumped for tonight bb :)

1:56PM

should I wear a suit…? I know it’s a new spot but the website definitely reads ‘fine dining’, like fine-er than most of my clothes know how to be...

2:24PM

I think I’ll do dark jeans & a black button up. johnny cash style. cant go wrong w that. hahah.

3:17PM

I know ur working still but im just really excited to see you:):)

It was cute – borderline adorable – how nervous Greyson seemed for their dates, even after almost a year of the two of them being together. Reed had, of course, answered Greyson’s plethora texts throughout the day, but had tried to keep himself subdued so he wouldn’t give away his hand; tonight, he was going to ask Greyson to move in with him.

He knew it was a bit of a long time coming, but Reed was really trying to keep from scaring Greyson off by doing anything too quickly. His boyfriend certainly had a bit of past-relationship trauma that Reed tried valiantly to navigate; it was hard to figure out what the right time to do anything was. Sometimes, he wasn’t sure there was ever going to be a right time to push their relationship to the next level. But things had been good lately; like, really good. Tonight felt… right.

Greyson’s presence was palpable before Reed even saw him blow through the door. He looked up from his phone and clocked his boyfriend, standing out side the restaurant with his elbow locked over his face; Reed cocked his head a bit, confused. Was he… coughing?

The chef, clad in the Johnny-Cash-getup he’d promised, shook himself out before pushing the door to the restaurant open. He pawed at his nose with the back of his hand while asking the hostess to point Reed out – she gestured towards their table, and Greyson smiled when the two of them locked eyes. Reed waved, smiling back. Something was certainly… off.

“Sorry I’m late, baby,” Greyson said, kissing the top of Reed’s head before sitting across from him. “The fuckin’ train was running late again.”

“I’ve told you a million times I’ll come pick you up for dates,” Reed said, squeezing Greyson’s hand across the table. “You don’t always have to take the train.”

Greyson shrugged, smiled a little loopily. “I like the train,” he said, picking up his menu and squinting at the small font. “Lots of time to think. I’ve come up with my best dishes on the subway, I’m pretty sure; you remember that tart I made for the writer’s dinner, the one where we saw each other for the second time? Came up with that on the train. I was sitting next to this girl, probably a student, and she was eating one of those little egg tarts, the ones from the Japanese bakeries? I thought, damn I bet a root vegetable in one of those would fuckin’ slay – spoiler alert, it so did. Where would I have come up with that if not for the train? Plus, it’s one of the most sustainable ways to travel. I get my good karma for not actively killing the environment in. Win-win. What’re we eat – HTSHH! NXTSHH!” Greyson’s explosion of word vomit was very suddenly cut off to stifle two painful-sounding sneezes into the back of his hand.

Reed blinked for what was maybe the first time since his boyfriend sat down. “...bless,” he said after a beat. Greyson nodded, sniffled a little, and picked the menu back up.

“What’s this place’s thing anyway?” Greyson continued, flipping the menu over to look at drinks. “I can’t seem to figure it out; are they Italian? Mediterranean? Fine dining? Just high-end? No tasting menu, but prices are high enough to warrant one. Wine list reads very Italian, but there are like three dishes with hummus on them? I’m half-expecting to be served babaganoush bolognese. Which… maybe would work? Actually, eggplant, tomato sauce… I could see it working. You never know. Can’t judge a book by its menu, right? What’re you drinking? Want to get a bot -?”

This second monologue was cut short when Reed reached across the table to place a gentle hand on Greyson’s face. Just as he expected: hot.

“Babe,” Reed said gently, taking his hand back, “you’re burning up.”

The chef cast his glance down, embarrassed. “You weren’t supposed to figure that out till after dinner,” he muttered. Reed laughed.

“Seriously? You had to know I’d figure something was up. You’ve been monologing since the moment you sat down. Have you been sick all day? You should’ve told me, honey. How much cough medicine did you take before you showed up here?”

Greyson looked up at Reed and gave him a little half-smile. “Pretty sure I downed half a bottle of Robutusssin, not gonna liiii – hh! HhNXTSHH-ue! Huh-TSHH-ue!” Once again, Greyson attempted to stifle, to no avail. He allowed himself two painful little coughs before righting himself again.

“Bless you,” Reed said again. “I wish you would just sneeze normal, that always sounds so painful.”

“We’re in a restaurant,” Greyson said, a huskiness beginning to creep in to his voice. “That’s so gross.”

Reed rolled his eyes. “Oh, please. Who cares? No one’s looking at us. They’re too busy with their many, many hummuses.”

A laugh bubbled out of Greyson, and with it came a flurry of congested coughs he directed into the sleeve of his shirt. “Don’t mbake me laugh,” he muttered, taking a drink of water. “You’re gonna get us kicked out.”

“Good,” Reed said, flagging the waiter. “I’m so sorry,” he said when the young, well-dressed server came to their table, “something’s come up and we’re going to have to go.” He handed the kid a fifty. “Thank you for your help.”

The server nodded, said thank you to Reed, and went to grab the two men’s jackets. Greyson raised an eyebrow, confused. “What’re you doing?”

“Taking you home,” Reed said. “You need tea and soup, not…” he glanced back down at the menu, “fattoush flatbread.” Greyson visibly deflated.

“I wanted to spend the evening with you,” he said, his voice subdued. “I’m sorry. I should’ve called and canceled, I just… I mbiss you when we don’t see each other all week. You’re always busy, I’mb always busy, it just fucking sucks. I don’t even know how I got fucking sick… oh wait, yes I do. Elijah had a cold last week – was that last week? Did I tell you that? I can’t remember. I think the servers gave it to him. Fuckin’ servers, I’ve never met a group of people who get sick mbore than theehh – huh! Fuck – HUHETSHHH-ue! Huh-! HhITSZZZCH-ue!” Greyson folded in half, his torso practically beneath the table in an attempt to keep the entire restaurant from hearing him. It was, of course, at that moment that the server returned with their coats. Reed took them silently, and stood to gather his boyfriend, who slowly unfurled himself from his own lap.

“Bless you,” he said, gently helping Greyson to his feet and slipping his coat over his shoulders. He lead the two of them past the host stand and onto the sidewalk, where he turned Greyson to face him.

“First of all,” he said, sweeping Greyson’s hair out of his eyes and caressing his cheek, “I know a subset of people who get sick more than servers, and it’s chefs. You and all your chef buddies are pestilence incarnate because you work nine hundred hours a week.” This prompted a little laugh from Greyson. Perfect, thought Reed. Break the tension.

“Secondly, yes, you did tell me that Elijah was sick, and I told you, and I quote, ‘Don’t get too close, I know you two love to share a cold’, but I know you don’t like to listen to authority, so not sure what I expected.” Another laugh. Greyson pushed his hair back, rubbed his nose, and pulled Reed in to hug him. Reed continued from this spot, pressed into Greyson’s shoulder.

“And thirdly,” he said, “I miss you too. All the time. Which is why I asked you out tonight.” He pulled away, reached into his pocket, and dropped a key into Greyson’s palm. “I don’t want to miss you anymore. I don’t want you to have to take the train from Brooklyn every single night, I don’t want us to hang out once a week, I don’t want to drop you at your apartment to take care of yourself. I want to see you when I wake up every morning. I want to hear you sneak in at three AM after you and Matt go clubbing. I want to take care of you, at home, when you’re sick.” Reed smiled, a little embarrassed, as Greyson stared at the key. “Move in with me,” Reed said. “Please.”

Greyson’s mouth opened, then shut without words a couple of times before he looked Reed in the eyes. “Yes,” he said, nodding. “Okay. Yes. Yes, please.”

Reed felt a smile bloom on his face, huge, goofy, unashamed. He took Greyson’s face in his hands and planted a kiss on his lips. Greyson held his boyfriend by the waist, then picked him up to spin him around. “I love you,” Greyson muttered into Reed’s mouth.

“I love you more,” Reed said, smiling. Greyson turned away then, suddenly to -

“HRRSHH-ue! HhhITSHZZCH-ue!” he sneezed away from his boyfriend, which prompted a laugh from Reed.

“Probably too late for that nicety,” Reed joked, elbowing Greyson playfully. The chef huffed out a laugh and rolled his eyes.

“I figured sneezing directly into your face would probably kill the moment,” he said, sniffling. “But I’ll go ahead and just do it next time.”

“Oh, shut up,” Reed laughed, kissing Greyson again. “C’mon. Let’s get you home and in bed. Sickie.”

Greyson smiled a little. “Yeah,” he said, looping his arm into Reed’s. “Let’s go home.”

[akascow]

the more posts i see about tua4 the more im convinced none of the writers went back and watched the previous seasons because literally so much is wrong dude HAHA

annoying words under the break and spoilers !!

for starters since when has allison ever helped klaus in the previous seasons🧍🏻‍♀️ it was always diego man. im glad he got to be the fun but very cautious uncle for claire but allison rarely helped klaus with anything except in s2 where they just got drunk together on the kitchen floor HAHA

also lila 'i dont like bracelets' pitts who was already shown making bracelets in 2 (with diego), losing her bracelet at the end of 2, then diego giving it back to her in 3 (and she wore that shit !!) all for it to be thrown away for whatever the fuck happened in the strawberry timeline lol

this ones a throwaway rant but 1) why did none of the fives in that diner experience paradox psychosis and 2) whyd they all look the same lol u cant tell me every five chose to wear the same exact suit with the same haircut (and the same age appearance wise!!)

someone already said this one so dont credit me but five wouldve 1000000% recognized his apocalypse that second he stepped outta that train (by the smell) and would not need to look around for 10 seconds at the debris he spent like 40 years in to clock it as ".....i know this place,, its my apocalypse" lmfao yeah man

not gonna get into this one but raymond "id rather spend a day with you than a year without you" chestnut would never fuckin walk out on allison and claire lol WHAT

anotha one that ppl have already mentioned but ben wouldve told klaus what happened to him when he died right? like he stuck around for 15 years because he wasnt ready to leave his siblings he for sure woulda mentioned it at some point right 🧍🏻‍♀️

and biggest of all (for me bc its been bugging me) but if lila had to be there in the end "otherwise itd just reset again" then why the hell didnt the other oct 1st people need to be there too are we just supposed to forget about them (RAHHH) if the reasoning is that they shouldve never existed (awful reasoning btw) then why do the others get a free pass HUH?? unless theyre like "well the cleanse took over the entire world so they got slorped up too" or "the others died a while ago these 8 are the last marigold kids" which is a stupid cop out and i will not accept it lmao.

also they never went anywhere with reggies alien self HAHA not a problem w me bc i do not care about him at all but like,, why was he an alien (i cant remember if they explained it in the comics but) HAHA whatever man

[themissakat]

ALOY ON THEMISSAKAT’S BLOG, THIS IS NOT A DRILL

i fuckin love horizon. seeing aloy in your style is something i didnt expect to see but it’s amazing

did you pick up zero dawn recently and then forbidden west right after? or have you played zero dawn a while ago and then played forbidden west recently?

please share any and all thoughts you want to share abt the games cause it’d be cool to hear what you think abt the games.

horizon cool games

I had zero dawn sitting in my steam library for maaaybe the better part of 2 years?? (i got it on sale ages ago) some friends were playing hfw and it inspired me to finally pick up hzd. I beat hzd a few months ago, mayyybe 2 or 3 months before forbidden west dropped on Steam?

I can't say any other series has gut punched me so many times and so well. I think overall I liked the first game better, just for the impact of the reveals (the data point talking about the Faro machines and the dolphins haunts me) but the addition of new characters in the second game plus expansion of the world and just MORE of aloy and her friends is so good.

gonna do a read more for hfw spoilers through the end of the game and maybe some burning shores?(hi kami dont look)

I can no longer live without Beta she is wonderful and my beloved and I want to replay hzd but the fact that Beta wont be there makes me SAD. The compare/contrast between Aloy and Beta is such an interesting concept and expands upon their relationship to Elizabet (in particular the pressure of her legacy) in such a fun way. I love taking a nature/nurture look at how they are as people and how they were raised, so similarly isolated and yet SO DIFFERENT because of their environment and the few people that were present.

I've been contemplating writing a character study drabble/ficlet from Beta-pov about Aloy throughout the game. I was screaming SISTERS at them during every interaction and then the ending with the PAYOFf just AHH.

I wish burning shores had a "chat with beta" option, I can only headcanon that Aloy and Beta chat or watch Beta's media in the evening when Aloy's resting.

The character development of Aloy learning how to interact with and trust other people is good soup. I could wax poetic about my head canons for her particular flavor of queer (given the time to organize my thoughts). I'm incredibly curious to see how they handle Seyka/Aloy going forward into the second game, in part because Aloy is such a goal-driven person, I can see her struggling to reconcile her own "selfish" motivations with the looming threat of the end of the world. (because like. girl if the world is ending you need to cherish every second you have with the people who matter to you. but also yall need time to figure out if you can beat nemesis. do be a tough dilemma there.)

I want to roll around in the brainrot more but its a struggle bc i'm a very au-centric fanartist/writer and the world of horizon is so good on its own i cant even put myself in the au mindset. for now i have to be happy with drawing aloy's amazing hair. its so beautiful i love it so much

but yeah. overall. horizon cool games.

[jaker-shit]

Then theres the question of whether or not im playing into or upholding harmful systems with the way i express myself here? Like how much of my thoughts and feelings regarding romance and sex and relationships is natural desire? Hiw much of the things i want are products of patriarchy that i need to unlearn? I do find women attractive, and i desire a sexual and romantic relationship to someone. I dont think im entitled to anything from anybody. Sometimes i do think of strangers sexually. It might be bad? Would it be different if i was attracted to men? Am i being selfish or making things about my own dipshit problems when i shouldnt? Does it matter if im on a useless personal blog? Is there a way to look at someone sexually and respectfully as a straight man? Does it matter if youre getting 0 pussy for the next millennium anyway? Is that some incel faggot shit? Does any of this make sense? Im having too many thoughts to type all out like i want to beam it directly to someones head but that would be like an infinite void of the absolute stupidest things a human being could say like honestly I should just be keeping this all in my head. Fuck is everything i do performative? Youd think i could perform something well or do something fuckin useful to anyone for once. Ah shit does a ton of this make me come off as a genuine creep? I dont talk to women generally and on the rare occasion i do theres zero flirting or anything so i try not to be a creep but maybe i just have shit vibes anyway damn i hope not. Yknow ive been a fuckin terrible son and brother. Im supposed to be a role model and support for my little brother but the only thing i can fuckin do i buy him booze until he turns 21 and can do it himself. Hes a fantastic kid hes in a university i could never handle. Hes fit and skinny and good looking. He’s actually a talented artist and writer. Ive been a stupid lazy fat piece of shit while he went and started to make something of himself and i know my parents hate it. I know i let them down every day they dont even need to say it. Useless fuckin 21 years old can barely handle a part time job lied about going to school for the past year to avoid disappointment cant do fucking anything right when asked what is even ghe point to being here still fuck this is stupid and should be ignored like my problems are so fucking stupid. I had every advantage and the people i know came from so much harder places and i havent the discipline or self control to accomplish anything. Its fuckin pathetic and instead of fixing anything and being a man im cryin aboit it online like a bitch i stg i do not deserve to live on this earth

[why-am-i-here-someone-save-me]

Spoilers for the Thelxie’s Fantastic Adventures event (you have been warned)

So. Genshins recent story event. Yeah. Yeeeeaaaah. YEEEEEAAAAAAAH. Hoyoverse. Why. Just. Just why? Why do you hurt me like this? For what unforgivable crime have I apparently committed that has encouraged you to harm me so deeply? I was having a good time. I was enjoying the game again; it was amazing I was having so much FUN and then BAM you had to slap me with personalized levels of trauma.

I knew it. I fuckin KNEW it. I knew the second they brought up a little boy “oh his ass gon die” and I WAS FUCKIN RIGHT I SWEAR TO GOD THIS GAME-

LET US HAVE NICE THINGS DAMNIT HOYOVERSE. YOU CANT JUST CALL MY DISASSOCIATVE ASS OUT WITH A FUCKIN “loneliness syndrome” AND THEN JUST BE LIKE “lmao kid was dead and mom is delulu” HOYOVERSE. I PLAY GAMES TO ESCAPE MY DEPRESSION AND YOU ARE SOOOO THOROUGHLY NOT HELPING.

Like. Brooooo. First you gon call me out on my kid self’s fuckin atrocious addiction to escapism; and then you gon just twist that knife thaaaat much deeper and kill the kid who I was lookin at thinkin ‘damn that’s just a video game little Luci’. Why. Whyyyyy.

GODDAMNIT WHY DO I NEVER LEARN MY LESSON WITH THIS GAME AND ITS SADISTIC WRITERS! I TOLD MYSELF AFTER THE WHOLE DEAL WITH RUU THAT I WASNT GOING TO LET IT HAPPEN AGAIN BUT NAAAAAH MY DUMBASS GETS ATTACHED EVERY DAMN TIME! AND RUU ALREADY DESTROYED ME BUT THEN THIS WAS LIKE INFINITELY WORSE BECAUSE ITS ONE OF MY OWN FLAVORS OF TRAUMA AAAAAAAA😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I will genuinely carry the trust issues that the Genshin writers have given me for the rest of my life. I will never get over the amount of unnecessary emotional anguish that they have inflicted upon me. But most of all I will never forgive myself for leTTING THEM DO IT TO ME COUNTLESS TIMES AAAAAA

I am NOT OKAY.

[just-some-random-blogger]

The Science Teacher & The Skeptic

Joel Miller x Science Teacher!Reader

Summary: "who cares about space when there's a fuckin apocalypse going on"

Word Count: 1k+

Warnings: crackfic, fem!reader, headcanons, joel 'im a contractor 🤠' miller, fluff, typos, etc.

A/N: ok this is borne of out me geeking about about the film 'the beautician and the beast' to @sloanexx and she's actually the author im just ghost writing it so if you wanna p2 you're gonna have to take it with her. dont shoot the messenger im blue just for consistency HAHAHH in this Tagging: @multifandom-fangirl4 @pinksirensong @aralezinspace

she can be a teacher at the qz

HOLY SHIT

he meets her bc she teaches ellie ✌🏻

OMG

!!!!!! STOP IM GETTING EXCITED FOR IT NOW

[post chat me] THIS RAT FINNA TALK TO ME ABOUT A FIC SHES EXCITED ABOUT AND NOT WRITE IT COS SHES 'NOT A WRITER' BROS ALREADY A WRITER JUST BASED ON THAT

joel never went to college so he thinks she's like super cool for

knowing shit about space and stuff

but at the start he lowkey hates her bc he thinks she's a snob maybe???

idk

GIRLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

GRILL

i do have saur many ideas-

[post chat me] YA DONT FUCKIN SAY 😪🙄🙄🙄

-for this tho like ellie loves her and comes home like

this teacher is so cool she knows so much abt space and stuff

bestie please write it

[post chat me] oh you sweet summer child shes not going to

and joels like who the fuck is this lady

BESTIE IM BEGGING

who cares about space when there's a fuckin apocalypse going on

joel is like you know what a real lesson is?

how to shoot a gun.

how to dress a wound.

not fucking stars and planets

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

BESTIE DO IT PLEASE

and ellie's like k cool wtv im going to school now

DO IT PLEASE PLEASE I BEG OF YOU

AND THEN THEY MEET BC JOEL GETS MAD AT ONE OF HER HOMEWORK HAHAHAHAHAHAH

he sees her drawing constellations and he's like this is fucking bullshit

THE WAY I GASPED

im gonna talk to ur teacher bc this isn't survival

BESTIE YOURE ALREADY WRITING IT SO PLEASE DO IT FOR ME

NO I CANT

[post chat me] 🙄🙄🙄🙄

ok so he confronts her in school right

OMG AND THEN

and he's like i wanna talk to the teacher who gave this homework

spicy

[post chat me] honestly hes such a karen for that ????

and they meet and he's like

this isn't survival skills there's an apocalypse going on and u have her drawing stars like a 5 year old???

HAHAHAHAHAHAH

and she's like u fockin wot m8????

>😀

there wouldn't be an earth if there weren't any planets!!!!

how else would we know how oxygen is formed and how the tides turn to get water!!!!

you big dodo bird

survival isn't all guns and shooting bc if that's all it was the rest of the world would be alive rn!!!!

and he's like oh fok me she fights back

>😞

omg he creamed his pants

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

and he runs home with his tail between he's legs

and he opens one of ellie's space books

and he's like this shit cool

joel wrong sexy teacher right

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

YOU HAVE TO WRITE THIS PLEASE I AM BEGGING YOU

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

im having so much fun just telling u

im smiling at my phone like an idiot

[post chat me] well you are an idiot 🤬🤬🤬

TELL ME MORE ABOUT THE FIC AND ILL COMPILE IT FOR YOU YOU LAZY BABY

HAHAHSJSHSHSHSH

what else is there to know

hmmm

he spends the night reading the space book and the next day he asks ellie like

umm hey can u teach me more about this space shit

OMG

and she's like no old man you wanna know more you go ask my teacher

ahHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

IM SCREAMIN

and he's like .... i don't wanna bc im embarrassed but i also rly wanna know abt how the earth goes around the sun? bc that's cool

WHAT IF THIS WAS MY LAST STRAW

>😭😭😭😭

[post chat me] this modern day man doesnt know shit about the sun that so embarazzing are you not embarazzed the american school system has failed him so hard 💀💀💀💀💀

and he goes to the school and he waits for all the kids to leave bc he's embarrassed and he's like

so... the planets. they all turn around and shit? that's how we get night and day

and she's like yuh m8

KEEP GOING IM CRYING

and he's like um could you tell me more...

HES SO LOVELY

and she's like ok how about you come meet me for an hour every week after my class on wednesday

and he fucking treats that like church

waiT WAIT OMG

SHES LIKE

want to attend my class <3

we'd love to have you

SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UPPP

DONT TELL ME HE SITS IN CLASS WITH THE KIDDOS

and ALL THE KIDS ARE LIKE HEY MR MILLER

HE WOULD NEVER HED SHOOT HIMSELF FIRST I THINK

THEN THEY SHOW HIM THE MACARONI STARS

[post chat me] there are two types of writers AHAHAHH

OK WAIT

MAYBE

NAURRRRRR

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

he lurks outside to listen and learn but

she catches him and is like um???

do u just want me to teach u bc all u had to do was ask

AWWWWWW

THEN HES LIKE IM A CONTRACTOR I CAN MAKE A WAYY BETTER SOLAR SYSTEM

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

u didn't have to like.. sit outside the class just to learn

>😭😭😭

FRRRR JUST TAKE A SEAT

he uses all his tools to make the best goddamn solar system

OMG HE FUCKING REDOES THE CLASSROOM AND MAKES IT SPACEY AND SHIT

and he shows it to her at their weekly session all proud

and she gives him a gold star sticker

places it on his jacket

DEAD

HE NEVER TAKES IT OFF

NEVER WASHES THE JACKET

ew stinky

HAHHAHHAH I LOVE IT

he preserves it

>😔

bc he doesn't want it to get ripped off

when he uses it our

*out

HAHAAH WHAT IF SHES LIKES *pinches nose* joel? is- is your washing machine broken 💔💔💔💔

HAHAHHAHAH

STOP

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

NOOOOOO

he'll shoot himself right there and then

AND THEN HE NEVER COMES BACK

HELLPPPP

walk to a clicker and beg it to bite

EW [HE] WOULDDDD

IM CRYINGGGGGGGG

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

ELLIES LIKE HAHAHAHAH

if i was writing it i'd stop it at him doing up the classroom like u said

like some time after their weekly sessions he does that

and she's like

i think i like this dumb old man

OMG AND THEN

you cant stop thereeeeeeeeeee

BUT ITS PERFECT

LKASJHFKJASASF OK OK

Fin

[post chat me] ok ok bonus cos she still went on 🙄🙄🙄🙄`

it's the intrigue that makes it nice

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

p2 where joel comes for show and tell HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

ahhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

THE SOUND THAT LEFT MY MOUTH

AND HES LIKE SO PROUD FOR BEATING 12 YEAR OLDS PLEASEEE ✋✋✋

IM A CONTRACTOR 🤠🤠🤠🤠

he fucking hates it and is miserable at first the whole time

but then he sees her supporting him so earnestly and then he's like oh shir i like it im gonna send these 12 year olds into the ground

make them eat dust

hELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

NAURRRRRRRRR

[forlorn-crows]

Ghoulette mischaracterizing...

I'm sure a lot of people will tell you it's mommy-coding Cumulus, which tbh it probably is. (see also: Aether. boy likes to be held too ya know?) But I've seen a lot of people actively pushing against that recently which makes me very happy.

So instead I raise you Confident-Boss-Bitch Cirrus. We've all seen her hyping the crowd behind the keyboard risers like a soccer mom on match day, she OWNS the stage with the keytar solo, and she's pretty much a universal dom in fics.

But, what if she's not the on-stage persona? (We all hc Dew as something other than just angry right?) What if she's actually hiding a deep feeling of needing to hold the pack together and appear in control all the time because of the turbulence around when she first joined the pack? I get strong eldest-daughter vibes.

I hc that she has a soft and vulnerable side the congregation doesn't see, even her pack don't know the full extent of it, only Cumulus does really since they were summoned together. She has insecurities too, just more hidden.

Here is where I tell every fic writer who ever put any time into making the ghoulettes more 3D that I love them will all my heart (your cirrus/mist fic was *chefs kiss* btw!) 🖤

Hope you're work day goes well!

i think y'all hit the nail on the head. honestly speaking i think cirrus is one of the least dynamically written characters in this fandom. 90% of the time she's the mean femme-dom. nothing more. like? thats boring! i like what you've all said about the reason she might put up a stern or stoic front.

but! also! what sage mentioned. while i think she takes performing seriously, she isnt serious in appearance, if that makes sense. she is having fun, jumping around, doing little hand gestures, and bein fuckin sexayyyy on that keytar. she's having fun with it all, performing just like the rest of them. i'll see clips of her and just scream LOOK AT HER GOOO.

and yes, how does that differ from her off-stage personality? i still think she's on the stoic side, like dew. but she isnt, like, apathetic. she's silly, she laughs, she teases, she pines, she fails, she cries. she. fUCKING. BOTTOMS Y'ALL. come on. you can't tell me swiss doesnt run her into the fucking ground sometimes. you cant tell me that lus doesnt absolutely pamper her and eat her out as long as she wants. you cant tell me that dew doesnt take it slow with her, hold her close and warm and let her relax for once.

i would really like to see us dig into her more. what is she really like outside the bedroom, outside of her relationship with cumulus? bc, lets face it, lots of us like to write them as a unit. while they're fucking in love, obviously, i mean come on, cirrus is a person aside from her bond w/lus. what is she like with the others? hell, what is she like when she's alone?

its why i wrote her the way i did in Been Long Enough. i wanna see her stutter, see her 'meet her match' so to say. bc i still think cirrus is very clever, smart. she can still like that dom role every once in a while (again, remember a little dash of these things are fine). but i think she gets tired of it too. she wants to be taken care of, wants to just totally have that control slip out from under her. maybe thats something about her, an anxiety like those of you mentioned that creates a front that isnt really her.

i wanna pick her apart more. @askingforthesun always helps me see the light about her haha. they are very passionate about cirrus and rightfully so, and i always love what they have to say about her.

[gayhenrycreel]

kay, my last post was about tokophobia and while im on that subject, STOP FUCKIN WRITING TRANSMASC CHARACTERS EXCLUSIVELY FOR MPREG. its very alienating to go into trans tags (non fetish tags btw) and its full of mpreg and other fetish stuff. kinda seems like cis people still see us as walking uteri. ya know. classic sexism. i dont care if you have a fetish, but don't put it in tags that are for community and support.

you would be horrified if someone put cnc fetish posts in tags meant for survivors right? a lot of trans men have tokophobia. dont put triggering material in places where you know people who need to avoid it will see it.

also, we can tell when you write trans characters as fetish fuel. its in the way subs are necessarily transmasc. its in the way we are reduced to our bodies (treated like walking uteri). its in the way all your trans characters are identical subs. its in the way every submissive trans twink is entirely comfortable with his body being objectified and called things that most trans men cant even stand hearing about themselves.

of course, trans men like that do exist.

but i never see fics about any other type of trans man. what about trans bears? fat trans men? masculine trans men? trans men who enjoy being thought of as a man? 'cause cis fic writers certainly dont like the idea of us liking being men.

i cant think of a single fic including a trans man with bottom surgery, and not many with even top surgery. or even testosterone.

we are trans because we are happy as men. stop writing all our representation as if we are women. you can write smut about trans guys. just don't reduce us to a single stereotype.

[sburbian-sage]

Quick update because i saw your post and while ive got the time

Immediately tried teleporting into their ship, definitely a no-go, very nearly scattered myself across the void trying, either i outright cant teleport in or i need to be able to visualize where im going

Already tried talking to the others and they refuse to "take action against their caretakers"???(They all said a lot of different things but this was the loudest word i could hear) no clue what that means but whatever fuck em

Best bet is to keep running and hit the astroids and see if i cant find a doorway into the fuckin magicant

Got a message from one of my coplayers but clearly they have been scrambled cause they're talking about a veritable utopia and how great it would be for me to join them and how i should stop being stubborn

Shits starting to look really fucking grim

I know I keep harping on this, but you DID acknowledge that I would be skeptical, but "the Others share an allegiance with spacefaring plant people" is really escalating this tale to new heights of "I'm highly fascinated in this fake story". I feel like I'm kind of ruining the gravitas of this all, in that this could be some internet ARG story like Alan Tutorial, except it's being platformed by an unlikeable fuck who keeps picking apart all the logical flaws and outlandishness of the story.

Unironically, you know people have published their own original fiction online, right? They did this in the old pre-SBURB universes, of course, but even in the age of the Replayernet, it's not just discussion forums and FAQ writers, there's legit authors out there. We even have unique genres now, like Plausible Fiction (kind of like Historical Fiction, this is a fictional account of a Session that could have happened), Fantastic Sessions (you're basically contributing to this one right now), or Speculative Post-SBURB, which envisions what life and society might look like if the Door wasn't broken. There was this one really cool web serial which was imagined a Post-SBURB world, but one that's experienced centuries of history and decay and eventually it becomes this gonzo sword & sorcery story. Like imagine Conan or Elric, but he's a Troll fighting a Basilisk with a fell sword empowered by Doom. It was cash.

What were we talking about? Oh yeah, you're currently being ganked by an alien armada. The Skaian Magicant would be the best place to lay low. I don't imagine they would know how to look for one of those things, and you can't easily be tracked while inside one. As for your next plan of action, I'm assuming the Others blocked you from fucking off into The Furthest Ring, so there's really only three options.

Ask your Denizen for help. You're kind of fucked up a creek right now, and they almost assuredly know what to do. Equally assured is the fact that your Denizen hasn't been scooped up in a flying saucer, considering the death-lasers they can blast out of their eyes.

Scratch your Session. Take those fuckers with you. Especially so I don't have to deal with them, or anyone else for that matter.

I know I keep harping on about the germ thing, but for real. At the VERY LEAST, alchemize yourself some weed-killer for if worst comes to worst.

[spicyraeman]

This week's batch of drawings will make you coo gentlepeople! Traumatised murder Bébé Lae'zel and happy Bébé Xan will make you melt like butter in a warm croissant! You never cared for kids? Now you do!

As a french speaker, the charisma check of a froggy frog Lae'zel would probably fail tbh. But it makes me laugh to imagine her accent being 100% harsher and the words mispronounced. They really missed a comical opportunity.

"What do you mean, wizard? Why can't I say 'I want to hit the beach' in front of the hatchlings? I had my hopes to see some phoques there. WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING SHADO-ART! We need to foc-us!"

Buuuuuut in french to say "my love / 🐸 my joy 🐸" you can say "mon cœur" which means "my heart". ( Coincidence? I think not!) I can almost imagine a scene where it's softly choked in a bloody pointy ear at camp after a scary fight. Almost. So just for that I can admit it can be cute. (Want more french lessons? Scream weewoo 🚑 at 3am and I'll appear on your bed, sleep-deprived with a complotist white board ! Special discount for fanfic writers and artists)

I saw briefly the translated version of the game, it's... an experience. They translated SH literally, it really brought out the cringe I probably should've felt in English but didn't. It's wayyy to close to "Shadowcunt" too, but we have Shart here so I can't really speak up. Poor girl is taking punches in every languages 😂

Also I love how everytime I send you something stuck in my brain, you come up with the most reasonable and obvious answers. Why do I forget these characters don't live in a bubble but in a society? Ofc there are gonna be pointy ears headphones 😂🤦‍♀️ All week I imagined some designs for those, then jewelries, then piercings, then I reaaally need to stop this brain. Qquipart is right too, Karlach is def a speaker user!

I live to give you cute drawing ideas. Doing the devil's work I'm sure, adding to the everlasting pile 😈

And take all the time you need to answer, obv. I'm sending a weekly rambling letter to a friend and finding an answer randomly in my mailbox ; waiting is part of the fun.

🫀🚑

Yes! I had kids on the brain at the time! It's not something that happens often, but i couldn't resist baby Xan or Lil'zel

I find French accents incredibly endearing, not particularly attracted to them, but theres something about them i just love. An obscenely french Lae’zel would make me lose my shit, and honestly, it would fit her. I've always had the hc that lae'zels accent is waaayyy more prominent than in game and that she mispronounces words more frequently. I mean, shes probably never had to speak common to anyone before the nautiloid, how would she know how some words are pronounced?

Also bestie ya cant just drop an atomic bomb on me like that, thats too fuckin cute bro my heart 😭

As for reasonable and obvious answers, they're like that cuz ive got terminal worldbuilder disease, and as soon as you sent that ask, i took a whole day just researching headphones and IEMs. I really should draw up some designs for them 🤔 and yeaaa karlach is def bumping the speakers at full volume

It truly is an everlasting pile, i should probably actually start writing them down lmaooo

Trust me, im taking my time lol my brain works at a snails pace, but seeing an ask from you makes my week so ty <3

[oh-bonerline]

hi!!! im super late sending this cos i had a super busy weekend and start of the week and it took me AGES to read ur new chapter and to get my thoughts in order but omgggggg it was absolutely stunning

the way u flashback inside the flashback bits is so clever like wow... it took me a while to figure out what was going on at first but when i finally got it (not an issue with ur writing im just fuckin slow lol) it like blew my entire mind fr especially the looping around to waughy asking “what happens next” like girllll ur a genius

also i just rly love these two together like can we please please pleeeeease admit that theyre perfect together or are we gonna keep pretending... ross and matty have history yeah but theres a reason why ross is going back to waughy now and yeah okay its bad that hes cheating on matty but it also feels good idk like it feels right u know?? been a raughy shipper since the iliwys days and im so glad someone is finally writing about them and doing it well ur such a blessing to us i swear

and one last thing before i go i wanted to mention how much i love that waughy is the top in this relationship like... yeah looking at him and then looking at ross and seeing them together you wouldnt assume he would be the one topping but omg thats something else that just makes sense to me??? cant explain why it just does and as much as i love ross being dommy for matty i think i love him being subby for waughy 1000 times more like please thats so hot and i need more

ok i swear im done now i just wanted to let u know ur incredible and this story is so great and raughy is endgame in my heart xxx

Hi!! Thank you so much for sending this in! No worries about the delay, I get it!

I had a lot of fun going back and filling in the Ross gaps from the previous chapter and then looping it all back around again. Extremely satisfying as a writer tbh. It did give me a headache sometimes and I did worry it would be a bit confusing but I'm glad to hear you enjoyed it! At one point I even had a mini flashback within a flashback within the main flashback. I stopped myself with that though lol

John and Ross really are perfect together. I'm quite attached to them at this point. Not only are they a joy to write but there is so much canonical shippy stuff with them. Like how many romantic and wistful photos of Ross are on John's instagram? A LOT is the answer. Anyway, happy to have you on board with Raughy because there is a lot more to come for them in the next part of this chapter 👀

And I will again defend Ross on the cheating allegations. Matty is categorically and adamantly not his boyfriend at this point so????

I love that you bring up the different dynamics between Matty and Ross and John and Ross. One of my absolute favorite things honestly. Like not only do I love dommy John, which does somehow just make sense??, but I also love how Ross gets to be a lot more versatile in this relationship. John is mostly in control but they can also switch it around sometimes, you know? Depending on their mood/vibe. They're just like incredibly compatible in that way.

Raughy might not be endgame in this story but they are absolutely endgame in my true heart. In the meantime, I'll do my best to bring you around to Matty and Ross by the end of this one. I hope.

Thank you again for sending this and for reading and enjoying my story! I appreciate you greatly! ❤️

[crookedkryptonitebeliever]

i’ve noticed that you update language barrier pretty much everyday with very little time or days between every update. i was wondering how you update it so fast? do you already have most of the story finished but just adding some last minute touch ups and/or checking for grammar mistakes? or do you just do one chapter a day in a impressively short time? i’m curious since what i noticed writers tend to take some time updating their stories so it was just really new to see someone update theirs so frequently. 

I shit u not, at this point im a degenerate neet

I wake up at 1pm, have one meal until 1:30pm abd then sit in front of the computer until 2am in the morning, typing away, each chapter i try to go for 4000 words but never able to reach them most of the time, so usually its around 3500 plus

It all started with me breaking my leg 💔 before that i had a job and shit but now nyeeh i cant really do shit without breaking down crying how painful my leg is, so im doing this to cope and stuff

If u look closer theres a lot of leg and foot injury mentions recently, especially when it comes to Yandere Best Friend

I dont do touchups and grammar check, or even check for plotholes or continuity- i rely on my vague recollection of the previous part , then i publish my chapters hot out of the oven, right after add a bunch of tags, link my masterpost and previous posts , at that point my brain is fried thru n thru and thars why my author's note looks like it was written by someone on fucking molly

How i write is by checkpoints or specific sentences that I want to be added in the story- and in between each checkpoints i pump out filler chapters, these filler chapters can range anywhere from one chapter or 7 fuckin chapters

U kno that wordy translation about "she who is divine" bullcrap? That is A checkpoint, everything else past the Giant vs 2718 fight was just filler lol

Fun fact, part 11 where theres a lot of angst with 2718 is considered a filler chapter 2 me

As soon as i put out a post, i go straight back to my drafts and work on the next part

The reason why thers so many fillers is cause i try not to use timeskips all that much, the pacing between chapters are usually within a 30 hour timeframe (with the exception where reader fell into a comas cause i dont want to write the entire journey back, i thought it would be boring as hell to just describe 2718 put a foot in front of his other foot repeatedly)

The next major checkpoint is probably like lightyears away, i try to churn out as much as i can before the end of this month, where ill restart uni and wont have any time to update AT ALL, lest i fall into dormancy until i break my other leg

Language Barrier is just one long bullshit session lol