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ofthecaravel · 6 months

Text

Brandy

Chapter Two

Summary: A port on a western bay serves a hundred ships a day, and the lonely sailors flock to the Caravel Cantina, run by the Kiszka brothers (minus one). But when their brother returns with a handsome sailor in tow, the youngest Kiszka brother finds his perspective about his family and himself turned upside down.

Tags: Even more brotherly shenanigans, angst, tension (both good and bad), cutesy first date butterflies, some tears

Words: 9.7k

A/N: Very cute lil chapter but...something's definitely up

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Sam was awoken by the unmistakable feeling of a gentle pressure on his forehead, as well as hushed whispers he could barely make out. He started blinking and trying to open his eyes when he heard Jake go "Fuck!" and audibly drop something, and when Sam tried to turn his head, the pressure on his head left and he heard even more things hitting the ground. He sat up with a jolt and looked around in a frenzy, trying to make sense of his surroundings as he tried to gain coherency. He was met by the sight of his brothers in their pajamas, Josh with a stack of books and a poorly concealed smile, and Jake with a book in his hand right at the head of Sam's bed. At his feet was a pile of books, varying from thin pamphlets to thick textbooks.

"Oh, for crying out loud, you guys," Sam moaned, his voice still gravelly with sleep. "When was the last time you did this forehead book balance shit? I was, like, seven."

"We just missed it so much," Josh whined, flashing a wide smile that Jake mirrored without even having to look at him.

"We're recreating memories of yore," Jake insisted, bending to scoop the books up, stopping to gently smack Sam on the side of the head with a book when he straightened and handed them to Josh. Josh's knees buckled slightly at the further onslaught of weight and let them collapse into a sliding pile across Sam's desk.

"Then I suppose you'll let me relive the glory of when I filled your shoes with shrimp?" Sam smiled blearily. "That's one of my favorite pieces of 'yore'."

"Absolutely not," Josh hissed as Sam giggled, turning to swing his legs out of bed but Jake put a firm hand on his chest and held him steadfast.

"No, no, no, don't move," Jake commanded, exchanging a look with Josh that sent him out of the room before turning back to grin at his little brother. "Since you slept so late, we've decided to pull out another abandoned Kiszka brothers tradition to celebrate my glorious return."

As if on cue, Josh came sailing into the room balancing three plates, terribly singing a childhood Sunday school song as he distributed them to Jake and Sam, who accepted them with oohs and ahhs.

"Aww, you shouldn't have," Sam fawned. "Breakfast in bed day!"

"A Kiszka classic," Jake proclaimed as he and Josh sat heavily on the end of the bed, crossing their legs and immediately tucking into their breakfasts.

Sam felt a warmth in his chest he hadn't felt in a long time as he stared down at the eggs dumped sloppily over darkly toasted bread ripe with nuts and seeds, with a scattering of chunkily cut apple slices. Josh had even served it on Sam's designated plate, a pale blue porcelain with a slight chip that had come from the first time Sam had ever done the dishes himself.

"Is it really that late in the morning?" Sam asked sheepishly, snapping an apple slice cleanly between his incisors. "We only did these after I slept in super late when I was sick."

"It's 11ish," Jake explained through loud chews. "But we both woke up early so, to us, this is late."

"You don't have scarlet fever again, do you?" Josh prodded, squinting suspiciously at Sam.

"No, I certainly do not," Sam replied indignantly as he swallowed his bite of apple.

"You had me fooled," Jake hummed coolly. "Last night, you looked unmistakably...flushed."

Josh snickered into his bite of toast and Sam frowned, his brow knitting in the certain way that always made his brothers even more entertained in their razzing.

"Well, yeah, you had me working like a dog," Sam explained, pointing his fork purposefully. "I was running all over the place for hours."

"Oh, like when you ran over to the jukebox?" Josh asked innocently, and Jake giggled as Sam felt the calm warmth in his stomach shoot up to his cheeks and ears as a hot rush of adrenaline as the memories of the night came trickling back in.

"Or when you closed?" Jake egged on as Sam shot glares between his two chuckling brothers. They were all grown men, but as they giggled and Sam scoffed, it was like they had traveled back in time to when they were small and all their energy was reserved for picking on one another over the breakfast table.

"I don't know what you mean," Sam muttered as he took a big bite of eggs, hiding any expression his face might betray while he chewed.

"Mmm, I think you do," Josh sang, batting his lashes at Sam theatrically while Jake twirled a piece of his hair.

"Ooh, I'm Sam, what's your name, sailor?" Jake mocked in a high pitched voice. "What's that? Your name is Daaaniel? What a handsome name!"

"Fuck's sake," Sam groveled, pushing Jake's shoulder. "I was going to ask you about that!"

"So you are going out with him this week?" Jake perked up, and Josh's eyebrows shot up as his mouth fell open, revealing the half chewed food in his mouth.

"Why did you tell some poor lackey on your ship that I was dying for a date?" Sam complained, his frustration from last night finally being released. "Does the whole crew think I'm some desperate floozy? Huh?"

"I didn't say that!" Jake insisted, putting his fork down and adopting a serious look. "You know I love talking about you guys, and when we took on Daniel he just seemed so perfect for you! I mean, he looks just like the guys you would write about in your-"

"YOU READ MY JOURNAL?" Sam shrieked, putting his plate on his nightstand with a loud clack as Jake recoiled with a nervous grin. "YOU READ MY JOURNAL AND YOU TOLD A STRANGER?"

"Sorry, what's going on?" Josh interjected meekly, his legs pulled up to his chest as he watched Sam's fiery gaze burn through Jake, who was protesting through weak, restrained laughter.

"Sammy, c'mon, give me a second to explain," Jake choked out as Sam spun his fork in his head fiercely, giving a loud exhale through his nose. "I never said you wrote about hot guys in your diary, calm down, I'm not completely evil. I sAAAID, mister, that you two have a lot in common and would be a good match. He asked about you all the time after that, and I didn't have any pictures to show him of you, so, you know, last night was a culmination of a lot of waiting."

"I guess that would explain some things," Sam grumbled, recalling Daniel's enthusiasm and saccharine charm. "But, I mean, he wasn't all bad. Except that he's a damn thief."

"What'd he thieve from you?" Josh asked amusedly, reaching out and plucking an apple slice from Jake's plate. "Your heeeart?"

"Can't you two get out?" Sam whined, only getting laughs in response as the twins continued to happily eat their breakfast. Jake seemed to take the hint that one more tease would end in a sea of porcelain shards and launched into a retelling of he and Josh's morning adventure on the wharf. One of the things that Sam had missed so much about his brother was his shocking abundance of grace; Jake could rile him up to the point of complete fury, but never pushed hard enough to make him explode. He was the perfect diffuser for Sam's ticking time bomb temper, a skill quickly learned in the aftermath of their parent's death. That was when Sam's fuse had been the shortest and spared no one.

But that time had passed. Now, they were all back together again, piling commentary and laughter on each other as Josh elaborated on their haggling with the egg vendor at the crack of dawn. Sam leaned back against his headboard and just observed for a minute, refamiliarizing himself with the way that his brothers would trade off sentences and throw words in for the other to enhance their part of the story.

"Hey, where'd you go there, Sammy?" Jake asked, wiggling his fingers in front of Sam's face, making Sam blink back to the present and smile without thinking.

"Sorry, still a little sleepy," Sam lied, sitting up straighter and cracking his neck.

"You didn't miss the part where the chicken followed Josh home, did you?"

"I'm an animal whisperer," Josh declared proudly. "She wouldn't even look at Jake. She just trotted up right behind me all the way up to the front steps. I thought that chicken was gonna break down the door the way she was pecking at it."

"Where is she now?" Sam asked through a laugh. This was such a thoroughly Josh situation, running into oddities at every turn. Sam had to be the sole errand runner for a while when the woman who sold from the dairy cart had her sister visiting and she kept trying to marry Josh off to her daughter in the Côte-Nord.

Josh paused for a moment and Jake started cackling, collecting the plates from him and Sam.

"Don't tell me there's a chicken in this house, Josh, don't you dare," Sam started lamenting, kicking at his brothers to get off the bed with his legs still covered by the quilt. Josh immediately scrambled off the bed and closed Sam's bedroom door with a bang, blocking it with outstretched arms. Sam swung himself out of bed and rushed to the door, only to be stopped by Jake setting down the plate and then grabbing him around the waist in one swift motion.

"Let me go!" Sam shrieked, smacking at Jake's head. "When did you get so freakishly strong?"

"When I started working on a fuckin' cargo ship!" Jake replied cheerfully, hoisting Sam an inch off the ground and whooping in delight when Sam started full on screaming and kicking.

"Show me the chicken! I know she's out there!"

"You have to say the magic word!" Josh announced, looking up at Sam with a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Come on, Sammy, we raised you better than this. Where's the courtesy?"

"Show me the chicken, please and thank you!" Sam obliged defeatedly, wiggling free of Jake's grip and swatting at Josh's arms.

"You can meet Clarice after you answer a few questions," Jake assured, clapping a firm hand on Sam's shoulder and shaking him back and forth a few times, Sam bending like a ruler under his hold.

"Clarice?" Sam snorted. "That's the name you went with? Is this chicken 80 years old?"

"Hey, she's a part of the family now, show some respect," Josh chastised, his arms still splayed out firmly over the expanse of the door. "Now. We have some serious stuff to talk about."

"Okay..."

"So..." Jake trailed off, strolling casually over to Sam's dresser, and then suddenly started to throw the drawers open. "What are you wearing tonight?"

Sam flushed and spun, letting out a cry of protest when Jake crouched to open the lower drawers and started pulling out shirts and pants, tossing them over his shoulder into premeditated piles on the floor.

"Hey, hey, hey, gentle, gentle!" Sam cried, dropping to his knees next to Jake and picking the clothes right back up, starting a cycle of him shoving them back into the drawers only for them to be yanked right back out by Jake.

"You need the perfect outfit for your date," Jake insisted, handing a shirt to Josh, who had come over to sit cross legged with them and was sifting through Jake's piles. "Too much?"

"Too much," Josh agreed, tossing it onto the bed. "What's Daniel's favorite color?"

"Indigo," Jake said, pulling out a dark blue button down. "This is sorta indigo."

"You guys really have nothing else to talk about on the ship, huh," Sam teased, still grabbing clothes and neatly folding them. "What's his second favorite? Vermillion? Chartreuse?"

"No, smartass," Jake replied, handing the dark blue shirt to Sam. "It's goldenrod. Try this one on."

"You guys are being so weird about this," Sam accused, slipping the shirt on and buttoning it over his bare chest. "It's just dinner. I don't even know the guy."

"Daniel's my best worker," Jake said, shaking a finger at Sam. "And my best friend on the ship. He's not just some guy. I really trust him."

"And you obviously already like him, so stop pretending like this is some arduous task you're doing for charity," Josh scolded good-naturedly, cocking his head to the side to appraise Sam. "Mm. That's not working for me. Jakey?"

"I agree, off with it," Jake affirmed. "Josh, you wanna decide on some pants for the young lad?"

"Already done," Josh said proudly, plucking out a pair of espresso tweed pants.

"Oh, I love those ones," Sam gushed as he shed the shirt, finally giving in to letting them play dress up. This was another childhood tradition being resurrected, Sam realized with a nostalgic pang. Only this time it wouldn't end with them sending him out onto the street decked out in their mom's wedding jewelry and a pillowcase dress and locking the door when he flew back to the doorstep wailing.

"Heeeere we go," Jake whistled, holding up a button down colored the warm yellow of the inside of a dandelion. "This is one of the ones I sent you, right?"

"Uh huh," Sam affirmed, taking it from Jake and putting it on. "From Sierra Leone. You said you bought it from a guy with one eye."

"You remember all that?" Jake looked genuinely surprised, finally stopping his frenzy and casting soft eyes on his baby brother. "I've sent a hundred letters and you remember a throwaway detail like that?"

A sudden hush fell over the brothers in their wreckage of Sam's room.

"Of course," Sam replied, his tone the gentlest it had been all morning, maybe in years.

"It's not like we have much else to read," Josh continued, clearing his throat thickly. "We missed you, you know."

'More than anything,' was said silently by both Josh and Sam. The afternoons they received a letter or package from Jake were followed by a night of reading and re-reading and then an evening of closed doors and lamentations.

"Yeah," Jake said weakly, looking at the ground. "I do know. And you know I'm sorry."

'So, so sorry,' was the silent reply of Jake. It had always been written in invisible ink right after he signed his name on his letters, folded and sealed with shaking fingers and guilt that pounded behind his eyes like a headache. The crew knew not to bother Jake after they touched down on a port with postal service; they just bought an extra bottle of whiskey and put it out for him to take to bed.

"We know," Sam said, his voice slightly above a whisper. "I'm happy to have you back, even if just for a little bit."

"Me too," Josh agreed, gently tapping his socked foot against Jake's knee.

"I'd stay longer if we could," Jake said seriously. "If it was up to me, we'd stay for a month. Maybe two."

"Isn't it quite literally up to you what you guys do?" Sam pointed out, trying not to let any frustration creep into his voice.

"Not really," Jake explained, almost meek. "We have a schedule to stick to when it comes to docking and buyers and suppliers and all that technical bullshit. Some shipyard in St. John's is expecting us next week."

"That's dumb," Sam mumbled petulantly, playing with the sleeve of the yellow shirt. "You've barely even told us what your cargo is. Don't they have whatever you guys carry already?"

"Don't be snippy, Sammy," Josh scolded, even though Sam knew damn well that he was thinking the same thing. "We're very proud of you, Jake. Just...hopefully next time you can stay longer."

"Hopefully next time you can stay," Sam whispered, fully sinking back into the hole he'd been digging the past 2 years. This morning was a dream, but he was starting to wake up again.

"I'm here now," Jake reminded them, putting a hand on each of their shoulders and leaning in. "Let's make the most of the time I have, okay? I don't want to spoil this time with my favorite brothers."

"We're your only brothers," Josh finished the age-old joke with a small smile. "You're right. If anything, Sam is the one impeding our time with his little date tonight."

Sam scoffed loudly, pushing both of them back and getting to his feet while Jake and Josh started giggling again.

"YOU guys are the ones who- y'know what, forget it," Sam threw his hands in the air. "Everybody out! Let a man put his pants on."

"Aye, aye, captain," Jake agreed, both him and Josh getting up while trading glances in an unspoken conversation. "We know you want to get all primped and proper for your suitor."

"We'll walk you to Skipper's," Josh asserted, ducking his curly head when Sam raised his hand in preparation for a noogie.

"Like hell you will!" Sam argued, firmly shutting his scheming brothers out of his room.

At 4:50, Sam was blushing 10 angry shades of pink as he walked down the street to Skipper's Pub to meet Daniel, with Jake, Josh, and Clarice the chicken in tow.

"Stop following me," he hissed over his shoulder for the thousandth time. "I'm fine."

"We need to make sure you get there safely," Josh insisted with a shit eating grin on his face, his hands happily stuffed in his pockets while he strolled with a spring in his step.

"I need to lay down the law with Daniel," Jake explained looking mock stern, clearly enjoying this just as much as Josh. "He needs to know how to behave around my beloved baby brother."

"BAWK," squawked Clarice, drawing the attention of every passerby and storefront as their misfit parade continued onwards as Skipper's came into sight.

Sam could see a tall, familiar figure leaning against the lamp post up ahead and his body started to come alive with an entire power grid setting his nerves alight. His palms started sweating and he spun around one more time.

"Go. Away!" he whispered furiously again, nearly jumping out of his skin when a yell cut off Jake's impending reply.

"Kiszkas! What a pleasure!"

Daniel had spotted them and was giving them an enthusiastic wave, approaching them at a rapid pace that left Sam faltering slightly in his stride. It wasn't until he was right in front of him that Sam realized just how unprepared he had been to see Daniel in the sunlight. He was donning a lightweight, cream shirt and simple black slacks, but the thing that made Sam clear his throat to avoid choking on a gasp was how Daniel had thrown up his hair in a curly twist, leaving his face somehow more open. A few curls had escaped and curled up under his jaw and bounced as he moved his head and gestured, taking a moment to acknowledge Sam's brothers and pointing to the chicken.

"I see you've brought your posse," Daniel teased, raising his brows at Clarice, who clucked quietly in response and clung to Josh's ankles. "I don't remember mention of a chicken, Jake, I'm surprised you'd leave that out."

"Clarice is a new addition to the family, Daniel," Jake chuckled, admiring her dark plumage. "You know me, I'd never not tell you about the family chicken. How was your sleep at the inn?"

"Deepest sleep I've had in years," Daniel laughed, his body language reading nothing but comfort and confidence. "Much easier to nod off when you don't wake up seasick every 2 hours."

"Amen to that," Jake replied, shaking his head. "I slept like the dead last night. I don't even think I dreamt."

"That's a bummer, the crew always looks forward to hearing about the crazy shit you get up to in Dreamland."

Sam cleared his throat again, this time to snap his brother back to reality. As he had gotten ready, he had wanted nothing more than to get dinner over with. But now that he was here, and Daniel was standing so tall in front of him with the early evening light bathing him in warmth, he suddenly felt he wanted Daniel all to himself for a few hours. Or the whole night. Dinner would decide that, he figured.

"We have reservations, gentlemen, shall we catch up later tonight?" Daniel proposed coolly, picking up on Sam's signal before one of the twins jumped at the chance to make a teasing comment. "I'd love to swing by for this famous Jake whiskey I've heard so much about."

"Sounds perfect," Jake agreed, giving Daniel a professional handshake that made Sam want to roll his eyes into the back of his head. "We just wanted to make sure our darling Sweetie Sammy didn't get to wandering."

"He was born without an internal compass," Josh confirmed, nodding sagely as Sam stared daggers. "Poor Sammy."

"Well, I'll get him where we need to be," Daniel assured them, putting a warm hand on Sam's upper arm and sending a jolt through his system. "Think you can manage the 1 minute walk without getting lost?"

"I can manage, thank you," Sam finally spoke, his heart giving an embarrassed jump at how his voice wavered ever so slightly. Jake and Josh noticed this subtlety and gave him identical looks of subtle amusement.

"Good, good," Daniel murmured, rubbing his arm twice and finally steering them away from Jake and Josh and the chicken that had now begun to wander between Josh's legs in boredom. "See you guys later!"

"Bye, Daniel!" they both called in the sing-song voice they had teased Sam with that morning, and Sam wished with all his might that they would explode as he heard them whispering excitedly while they walked away.

"They never leave you alone, do they?" Daniel asked Sam, his voice pitched in a lower register that made Sam's ears twitch and spine straighten.

"Not since I've been alive," Sam responded, his nerves escaping as a breathy little laugh he wasn't expecting. "They're the most embarrassing people on Earth but I love 'em."

"That's good, they certainly love you," Daniel hummed, letting his hand fall from Sam's arm. "That's why they annoy the shit out of you. I should know, I'm an older brother myself. Thousands of miles and a sea that's as deep as it is wide couldn't stop me from bugging my baby sister."

"What's her name?" Sam found himself asking as Daniel opened the door to the pub for him, and Daniel blinked in surprise at the question.

"Josephine," he answered with a smile, the bell on the door chiming cheerfully as they stepped inside. "Pretty as a peach. I'm sure you two would get on."

As Sam took in the scene at Skipper's, he became aware of the sheer lack of ...well, the scene itself. There was no hazy cloud of tobacco blanketing everything in its scent, no loud cacophony of shouting men, no violin whistling in the corner with its accompanying hat of crumpled bills and scattered coins. No waitresses bustling, no bartender snapping, no smell of grease and salt.

"Uh," Sam stuttered, looking around with visible confusion. "Wow, I've never seen it so empty here. It's usually a madhouse."

"I figured," Daniel said slyly, walking ahead of Sam and training a cool grin on him. "I got here early this morning and talked to Skipper and rented it for a few hours. We have the whole place to ourselves until 8. You think you can fit your interrogation of my character into that time frame?"

Sam had never been one to be rendered speechless, and yet there he stood, his mouth slightly ajar as Daniel's smile grew while he watched Sam blink, knitting and unknitting his brow with sweaty palms.

"Last night, at your bar, it was pretty crazy with the guys," Daniel started to explain, slipping his hands into his pockets. "I saw you flinch every time somebody yelled. I thought you might appreciate the peace and quiet."

"What do you want from me?" Sam asked quietly, his voice cracking ever so slightly as he squinted at Daniel.

"This one dinner," Daniel said simply, walking backwards towards the backroom. "With you. Come on, let's sit down and get a drink."

Sam followed Daniel as he led him over to one of the booths, one in the corner that was usually snatched up as quickly as they opened. The table was laden with a stubby candle, a wilting flower in a smooth blue vase, and two menus carefully placed across from each other. Sam slid into his seat, landing hard as he took the weight off his weak knees. He was having a very hard time adjusting to this environment. How was it he had gone 20 plus years and never been on a date before? How had he gone this long and never been thought of with this much care?

"You're over 21, right?" Daniel asked nervously as he settled in his seat, picking up his menu as he sat back and spread his legs, his knee knocking against Sam's under the table and making him jump. Daniel didn't seem to notice this, not moving his leg and poring over the menu's measly contents.

"Yeah, I'm 22," Sam replied, trying not to shift around as much as he wanted to while he started to look over the menu himself. God forbid he bumps Daniel and he moves his knee from his. "But they don't ask here. Or anywhere else in town, really. If you're old enough to walk and keep a coin in your palm, they'll serve you."

"Surely not at The Caravel?" Daniel accused over the top of his menu.

"We're young enough to know who's who and how old," Sam elaborated, a smile creeping onto his face. "We only throw 'em out if we don't like them, but those people usually stay away. The rest, we just water down their drinks a little and keep an eye on them."

"That's pretty courteous," Daniel complimented. "That's probably why you guys are so popular. It has a good atmosphere. Very inviting energy."

"And great service, right?" Sam joked, raising an eyebrow. "That's the one I always hear. Even though I'm not sure that's really what they mean when they say it."

"Sounds like you deal with a lot of colorful characters."

"That's one way to put it."

"I should know, I have a feeling I'm one of them," Daniel grinned, and Sam laughed.

"Honestly? I've dealt with so much worse," Sam replied truthfully. "Overall, you rank pretty low."

"Sounds like you're liking me better," Daniel said triumphantly. "I knew this would happen. I've charmed you."

"It's only been 3 minutes," Sam pointed out coolly.

"And I've already had you speechless," Daniel countered, his eyes flicking over Sam's face and upper body for a few seconds. "That's the power of my charm. It works fast. I like your button down."

"Thanks," Sam replied, his heart beating against his rib cage so fast he was nearly breathless. "I like yours, too."

"I'm so glad you like my plain, white shirt," Daniel chuckled. "I was really worried."

"I'm bad at compliments," Sam blurted, his face heating up at his own admission. "I do mean it, though. It's...nice. More formal than I see a lot of sailors wear. And, I mean, we're a port, so I see a lot of sailors."

'Oh my god, stop talking,' screamed his inner monologue, whom he indulged by biting on his lower lip and turning his attention back to his menu, pretending to be suddenly engrossed by the misspelled description of a tuna melt.

"Are you nervous, Sam?" Daniel asked slowly, resting his forearms on the table with a flirtatious grin, raising his eyebrows in surprise. "You seem a little nervous. I mean, it's not like this is your first date or anything, is it?"

Sam tried not to bristle at his words, instead maintaining eye contact for a brief moment before silently returning to his fake menu reading, politely scratching his nose and willing himself to not go beet red in the cheeks. All the teasing joy on Daniel's face slowly faded into a genuine shock, his mouth opening ever so slightly as he leaned further across the table.

"No way in Hell," he whispered. "Ain't no way. You? You mean to tell me YOU have never been on a date before?"

"What do you mean, me?" Sam asked, lowering his menu finally to look Daniel head on. "It's really not a big deal."

"I'm not saying it is, I'm just saying it's odd. I mean, from a statistical standpoint."

"Sorry?"

"You're attractive," Daniel breathed, adopting a look of real confusion. "You could have anyone you wanted."

"Oh, please. Now you're just buttering me up," Sam scoffed, shaking his head reflexively as he tried to look anywhere but the hazel abyss of Daniel's stare. "I just, I don't know. I'm busy."

"Sure," Daniel rolled his eyes. "You must have been asked two dozen times."

"A night," Sam corrected. "I never said I hadn't been asked."

"But you've never said yes."

"Let me put it this way, Dan," Sam said, leaning forward in a spontaneous moment of bravery until there were only inches separating their noses. "The dates I get asked on aren't really meant to take place during the day, or exceed more than 10 minutes. After a while, the "flattery" gets sort of lost on you."

Daniel blinked and frowned, his face deflating into a somberness that confused Sam.

"So..." Daniel started, twiddling his fingers pensively. "You didn't think I was actually going to take you out on a real date?"

Sam held his gaze, feeling nervous for a minute that Daniel could see right through his eyes and into his head, nervous that he would see the replay of all the crude comments and requests that Sam had accumulated over the years and never, ever forgotten. No matter how much he pretended they didn't bother him.

"No," Sam relinquished quietly. "I did not. And, if I'm being completely honest, I'm still waiting for the other shoe to drop."

"What would I ever spring on you?" Daniel asked sincerely. Sam realized, then, that Daniel really didn't know the answer, and his heart ached in a foreign way that felt almost uncomfortable.

"That your intentions with me are not as pure as you're pretending they are," Sam said, but he immediately knew that his concerns were not the accusation he had been so certain of. "But maybe you're starting to change my mind a little."

Daniel's puzzled frown lifted into a small smile, his big eyes softening as he looked at Sam for a beat more, stretching the silence until it twanged with a tension that Sam was starting to get a taste for.

"I'm happy to hear that," Daniel murmured, leaning back against his seat again. "I hope to change your mind more than a little bit by the end of the night. And I hope you know that Jake would have my ass if I ever tried to hurt you."

Sam let out a laugh, relaxing into its release as Daniel lifted the darkness from the booth with his crooked grin and ease.

"It could be fun to watch you get thrown overboard," Sam teased, and Daniel scoffed in mock offense. "We'll borrow a plank from a pirate ship. Get a good crowd, pass around some smokes. It could be a whole event."

"Your cruelty wounds me," Daniel accused, even though his smile was practically dripping off his face. "Hey, that'll be our next date. I'll give you a proper tour of The Barbarian."

"We haven't even finished this one," Sam laughed, looking around the empty restaurant. "Are they even going to serve us? You promised me dinner."

"And dinner you will get," Daniel promised. "I already ordered for us both ahead of time, don't worry about it."

"What?" Sam said, shocked by Daniel's preparations once again. "Then what did they give us menus for?"

"I thought keeping them would be more authentic," Daniel admitted sheepishly, securing Sam's menu with a finger and sliding it under his own. "Plus, I knew I wanted to set up as many opportunities as possible to see your cute little surprised expression. Why would I pass up on such a fun chance?"

Sam felt the heat rise to his face again as Daniel tossed him a casual wink. A minute later, a waitress came through the kitchen doors carrying a slew of plates topped with pink fish, greens, and golden potatoes that threatened to roll over and across the floor. Daniel whooped excitedly and the waitress laughed, the two of them striking up a lighthearted chat as she set down the plates and their rolls of silverware.

"Can I get you two any drinks?" she asked, pulling out her notepad and pen. "They're on the house."

"Are you sure?" Daniel asked as he unfurled his napkin. "It's not an issue if-"

"Oh, no, no," she refused, flashing Sam a smile. "The Kiszkas supply all our best liquors, it's the least we can do, really."

"You guys are regular tycoons, huh?" Daniel whistled, and Sam waved him away.

"No, no," Sam insisted humbly. "We just look out for each other. We'll both have a brandy on the rocks, please, Violet."

"Of course, Sammy," she smiled as she jotted it down, nodding politely before walking away. As Danny looked down to admire their dinner, she caught Sam's eye, pointing at Daniel and mouthing 'Wow!'. Sam laughed and Daniel looked up, his fork already deep in his salad.

"What?" he asked.

"It's nothing," Sam replied with a mysterious smile, popping a baby potato into his mouth and looking down shyly. He could still feel Daniel's eyes on him as he chewed.

"Brandy, huh?" Daniel continued, and Sam silently looked up at him, shrugging gently.

"Yep," Sam said simply. "Brandy."

At 8:15, Daniel and Sam rolled into the Caravel in a burst of giggles and flushed cheeks, the sound of their chatter filling the empty expanse of the bar. Jake and Josh had been engrossed in a lively conversation as they prepped for the evening, but they went silent with wonder as they watched their brother float up to the bar with Daniel right behind him, watching Sam unwaveringly as he babbled enthusiastically.

"Hey, you two," Jake greeted gingerly, almost as if not to scare away whatever demon had clearly possessed Sam to be this bright before a shift. "How's it over at ol' Skips?"

"Delightful," Daniel grinned, patting Sam loudly on the back as he took a seat next to him. "I learned so much about this guy right here. Like the fact that he cannot handle his liquor."

"For the last time, I'm not drunk!" Sam exclaimed in annoyance. "I had two drinks. Two. God forbid I let loose a little."

"I don't know, Sam, I haven't seen you this "relaxed" in a while," Josh teased, pulling his wild halo of curls back into a weak little ponytail as Sam gave him a private look of warning. "You can work tonight, right?"

"Of course," Sam defended, mirroring Josh's motions and starting to comb his fingers through his hair and brushing it away from his face. "Like I said, I'm not drunk."

He really wasn't. If he was drunk on anything, it was Daniel. Hours had sped by as they talked over dinner about everything and anything that came to mind. Daniel had clearly prepared some talking points beforehand, but the conversation had taken natural twists and turns of its own that had followed them all the way to the bar. Sam was already trying to memorize what he could of Daniel; his favorite season was summer, he cracked his knuckles when he was deep in thought, he was the quietest guy on the ship (which came as a big surprise to Sam, all things considered).

"Well, even if you were, I don't expect we'll get many patrons besides a few of my men," Jake said as rubbed a glass on his shirt before putting it back. "You need a hair tie, Brandy?"

"I got it," Daniel interjected before Sam could snap at Jake for calling him Brandy yet again, reaching up and releasing the jaws of his hair clip. He casually shook his curls loose, one of them brushing Sam's cheek as Daniel leaned over to fasten the clip over the mess of hair that Sam had bundled at the back of his head. The contact made Sam inhale sharply and sit straight as a board while Daniel worked securing every loose strand of hair, humming as if it were nothing. Jake and Josh stood there in awkward silence, both of them making intense eye contact with Sam as they all had an unspoken family talk.

'Get a room,' started Josh, speaking through a smile playing on his lips.

'I knew this was a good idea,' added Jake by purposefully looking down into the glass in his hand.

'I hate you both,' replied Sam by narrowing his eyes at them. They all snapped back to reality when Daniel held his hands up and admired his handiwork, patting Sam on the back yet again.

"There you go," he said proudly, tucking his own hair behind his hair and assessing Sam's bun. "Looks close enough to the one you were rockin' last night."

"What do you say, Sammy?" Jake sang, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Thank you," Sam muttered.

"You're welcome," Daniel replied with a smile. "I do all the guys' hair on Barbarian. I guess that's the perk you get with being the only one with a sister. Can you believe I'm the only one? I've never met so many only children in my life."

"Barbarian?" Josh echoed, knitting his brows. "I thought-"

"Can I get you anything to drink, Danny boy?" Jake blurted, loudly placing an empty glass in front of Daniel and startling Josh away from his train of thought, who instead just threw him an annoyed glance. "Whatever you want, that was the deal."

"The deal?" Sam asked critically. "He buys me dinner, you buy him a drink?"

"You betcha," Jake laughed, pulling out a bottle of his whiskey and pouring Daniel a tall drink, loudly dropping a few ice cubes in the liquor and sliding it until it nudged Daniel's hand. "Bon appétit."

Daniel looked embarrassed as he took the glass, melting under Sam's pointed glare. Sam realized he wasn't all that justified in being as annoyed as he was; Jake had told him that he had set this date up from the get go. But Daniel had been so sincere and fun and genuinely caring during their dinner that maybe for a second Sam forgot he might only be doing it to fulfill that agreement, and not because he was actually interested in Sam.

"Well, enjoy your hard earned drink," Sam bid sarcastically, getting up with a start and stomping to the back to grab his apron and tray.

"Oh, come on, Sam," Jake called after him, but Sam didn't look, simply turning the corner into the cramped backroom and snatching his apron violently from the wall. He stood in front of the cracked mirror next to the hook that held the aprons and maintained a steely staring contest with himself as he cinched the fabric around his waist, his heart hammering angrily in his chest. Sam had never felt so stupid in his life. Something during that date had made him a little lighter, but here he was, crashing back down to Earth like he had this morning. He scolded himself for getting so caught up in temporary reliefs from reality, letting out a heavy sigh as he clenched his jaw and tried to trick his mind into ignoring the pressure building in his waterline and clouding his sight.

"Fuck," he whispered, holding the heels of his palms against his eyes and swallowing purposefully, steadying his breathing as he tried to force any runaway tears back into his tear ducts. This was so stupid, he thought. So fucking stupid. He was getting worked up over nothing.

"Hey."

Sam cursed and removed his hands from his face, wiping his palms on his apron and harshly turning to face the voice in one, fluid motion.

"Woah," whispered Daniel, who was standing behind him with an apron in his hand, concern painted all over his face. "I..."

"I'm fine," Sam snapped, the emotion in his voice betraying him. "You're not supposed to be back here."

"I'm serving tonight," Daniel announced, holding up the aforementioned apron, which looked almost like a washcloth in comparison to his arm. "Captain's orders."

"For fuck's sake, I can handle myself," Sam groaned, trying to grab the apron from Daniel, who held it tight in his hand. "Can't you just leave me alone?"

"It didn't seem like that was the case half an hour ago," Daniel retorted, pulling the apron away from Sam and tossing it over his head. "It seemed like you were pretty happy to be in my company."

"Yeah, well, that was before-" Sam stopped, unsure of where that sentence was going.

"Before Jake uncouthly reminded us both that our date started out as a scummy sailor's deal?"

Sam huffed and rolled his eyes, turning back around to the mirror. Of course, he could still see Daniel in the reflection, and the frustration surrounding his expression tensed his nerves even further. Daniel with his sad, lapdog eyes roaming over Sam's face, which was flush with color and adorned with his trademark scowl.

"Maybe that's what it was supposed to be," Daniel spoke again. "But it was never at your expense. Jake made it very clear from the beginning that I didn't have to do a damn thing. It was just an idea, but I was the one who agreed to actually do it. And maybe I was playing it up a little bit initially last night but..."

Daniel paused, his eyes wandering in space as he finished tying his apron until Sam finally caught his eye in the mirror.

"I only continued playing it up because I realized I actually liked you as a person," Daniel confessed. "It wasn't a bet anymore. I just wanted to get some actual one on one time with you when you weren't on the clock and rightfully annoyed with me. And I meant what I said at dinner tonight. No bad intentions. My cards are on the table."

Sam stood there numbly, trying to absorb what he was hearing and trying to sort through his thoughts. If there was one thing Sam was good at, it was being overwhelmed.

"And, I mean," Daniel plowed on, smoothing the apron against his legs and allowing a hesitant smile to tug at his lips. "I don't have enough time to make any other friends, so you'd really be doing me a favor by hanging out with me some more."

Sam stayed silent, keeping his lips tight to avoid Daniel's smile from infecting him too, instead sniffing once and staring at his shoes.

"I'll give you a dollar if you get breakfast with me tomorrow?"

"Shut up, man," Sam finally said, giving in to a little laugh and turning to face Daniel. "I guess...I guess it wouldn't be so bad if we hung out again."

"Thank goodness," Daniel said with an exaggerated sigh of relief, half of it genuine. "I'm sorry I keep giving you so many reasons to hate my guts."

"I don't hate your guts," Sam replied softly. "But I am going to give you all my worst tables tonight."

"That's fair."

"And I get half of your tips."

"Take them all, I don't want them," Daniel grinned.

"How can you turn down spare change like that?"

"I don't need it."

"Surely you don't make enough to always live this lavishly when you're docked," Sam accused as he grabbed his tray from its little shelf and handed one back to Daniel.

"I have a great accountant."

"Maybe you're a pirate."

"Maybe I am," Daniel smirked devilishly, raising an eyebrow at Sam and making his heart race faster than it already was. Sam approached him, feeling a little emboldened by the equal ground that Daniel had established and the liquor that lingered in his bloodstream.

"You're too nice to be a pirate," Sam murmured, smacking his serving tray against Daniel's broad chest. Daniel held his gaze and his crooked smile grew, cocking his head and appraising Sam from under low lids and heavy, dark lashes.

"You sure about that?" he responded calmly, his voice low and husky as his eyes flicked down to Sam's lips, reminding him of just how close he had gotten. He felt his breath rattling excitedly in his chest as he watched Daniel's pupils unmistakably expand in their hazel pools when the tip of Sam's tongue flicked out to lick his lips, feeling the few seconds that passed like they were hours.

"BOYS!" came the rolling shriek of Josh's voice, jolting them away from each other as they turned to the sound. "Customers! Quit sucking face and make me some money!"

"We are NOT!" Sam screamed back, immediately powering towards the eruption of laughter from the bar. He left Daniel standing there, who took only a second to catch his breath and stifle a smile before obediently following after him.

The Caravel didn't have many patrons that night, but Daniel made it more than worth their while. The Kiszka kept having mini meetings at the bar where they hunched over and spoke in rapid fire whispers and giggles as they watched Daniel weave between tables and charm every customer into turning out their pockets for him. Sam was still at the beck and call of a few of his regulars, but after someone had suggested he "show a little skin" to get a tip, Daniel had swooped in, pointedly tied up his own shirt, and skirted Sam to the sidelines.

"Pigtails next, Wagner!" one of Jake's men called from a corner table, where 6 of them had huddled and crammed their glasses together on the small surface.

"Do a spin!" yelled the guy next to him, and they all cracked up when Daniel did just that, blowing them a kiss as they wolf whistled and yowled while hustling over to the bar to discard his tray of empty glassware.

"You want a job, Danny?" proposed Josh, pouring up a new round. "I can't pay you much more than Jake, but if you keep this up you'll be drowning in tips."

"Then who would carry all of Jake's big, heavy boxes?" Daniel said, cracking his back and rubbing his neck. "I'd think about it but I'm not even keeping these tips."

"What?" Jake spluttered, pulling down his sunglasses to stare Daniel down. "You just made 40 bucks in 20 minutes. What are you going to do with all that?"

Daniel looked over at Sam, who had been leaning against the bar resting his chin in his hand and enjoying the break that Daniel had allowed him. Plus, he couldn't say he hadn't been enjoying the view a little, too. Sam looked up at Daniel and they all watched as Daniel scooped out all of his tips and piled them in front of Sam, giving him a wink and striding off back into the fray. The brothers stayed silent for another minute, blinking at the pile of money glimmering on the wood.

"Sammy," Jake said slowly as Sam quietly started separating the coins and bills. "I need you to listen to me very carefully. You need to marry him."

"Shut up, Jake," Sam muttered, pursing his lips slightly to keep a giddy smile at bay as he pushed the stacks of coins towards Josh to roll.

"I've never seen anything like that," Josh remarked as he slid the coins into their paper towers and pushed them right back to Sam. "I mean, I thought I was a gentleman, but, wow."

"I told him I got half of his tips tonight," Sam explained as he slid the money into his apron pocket.

"Pretty sure that was more than half," Jake scoffed, looking back over to Daniel, who was laughing with the men at the corner table. "Look at that, he's even got Carson and the guys docile. I can never get them to settle after a few drinks."

"What a guy," Josh sighed longingly, shaking his head theatrically.

"He's alright," Sam said, sneaking another sidelong glance at Daniel and startling when he saw Daniel had already been looking at him, shooting Sam a surprisingly shy smile before turning back to his customers.

'He's more than alright,' Sam thought to himself as he watched Josh place a round of shots on his tray. The thought scared the shit out of him.

"Walk you home?"

Daniel bumped his shoulder against Sam as Sam locked the register up for the night.

"I won't be alone this time," Sam reminded him. "My brothers are surprisingly sober tonight."

"Whatever," Daniel said, pulling off his apron and messily folding. "We can walk ahead of them or something."

"You're so obsessed with me," Sam accused, taking Daniel's apron and walking to the back room to hang it next to his. Daniel followed him and offered an offended scoff, standing in Sam's way.

"Forgive me for wanting to keep you company," Daniel teased, reaching up and flicking the end of Sam's nose, who scrunched it in annoyance and slapped his hand. "Alright, I'll leave you alone this time. What are you up to tomorrow?"

"I have to go to the market in the morning, and I planned on stopping at the glassblowing shop sometime before my shift," Sam groaned, his lip curling. "Customers break our glasses like they think we're made of money. Glass is more expensive than you'd think."

"Well, if you have any free time, you should swing by the inn," Daniel smiled, leaning his head against the wall and appraising Sam with a soft look. "My room has a record player and a great view of the alley where all the drunks go to fight. It's a pretty sweet deal. Room 1, 'cause, you know, I'm your number one."

"How tempting," Sam hummed, crossing his arms. "I'll think about it. But if you're trying to seduce me, it's not working."

"Isn't it?" Daniel purred, winking and sending Sam a flurry of butterflies in his stomach, which he masked with a roll of his eyes and smacking his shoulder against Daniel's, trying to pass him.

"Go home, get outta here," Sam ordered as he strode into Daniel's side again, trying to make him budge. Daniel grinned, unmoving.

"Mm, nope, try again," Daniel challenged, leaning further against the wall with a cocky look. "Push me aside."

"Fuck off," Sam grumbled, slamming his shoulder into Daniel's but stumbling backwards instantaneously. He then proceeded to place his palms flat against Daniel's chest and push with all his might, causing Daniel to shuffle ever so slightly and chuckle.

"You're killing me, man," Daniel laughed, looking down at Sam with a delighted warmth in his eyes.

"Move!" Sam whined, slapping his palms on him again, nerves fluttering in his stomach with every moment that passed with Daniel's body so close to his. He made the mistake of making eye contact with Daniel, finding himself frozen with his hands still pressed against Daniel's shirt as he became more and more aware of how little there was separating their skin. Sam's heart jumped into his throat when Daniel leaned down so that their noses were nearly touching.

"You're adorable," Daniel whispered. Sam could feel his sweet breath on his face, blowing the loose strands that brushed against his ears. Before Sam could reply, Daniel straightened again and flattened his back against the wall, allowing Sam to breeze by him and burst out onto the floor.

Jake and Josh were huddled by the jukebox, talking in a low register that would have surprised Sam any other time when he wasn't so overwhelmed and jittery.

"Ready?" he asked, trying to keep the strain out of his voice.

"You two go ahead, I'll wrap up here," Josh insisted, clapping Jake on the shoulder and turning him in Sam's direction. His voice was oddly tight, and Sam passed a curious look between the two of them before Jake grinned cheerfully and moved past Sam.

"Come on, Sammy, you know if we linger he'll change his mind and give us chores," Jake said, yanking on Sam's arm and looking back at Josh. "Hey, we'll talk in the morning, yeah?"

"Yeah," Josh answered simply, immediately spinning to give his attention to the jukebox and leaving Sam even more confused as Jake led him to the back. Daniel was still there, waiting by the door.

"What are you still doing here, sailor?" Jake laughed, blissfully unaware of the tense stare Sam was sneaking at Daniel. "Aren't you sick of us yet?"

"Completely," Daniel shot back, nodding his head at the door. "But I can't leave in good conscience without knowing if the ol' girl is safely locked up or not."

"You don't trust us to remember to lock our own establishment?" Sam countered as they stepped out into the fresh night air.

"Like anybody would try to break into this dump," Jake snorted as he locked the door behind them with an exaggerated jangle of the extra key ring. "There. Now Josh is locked in."

"Oh yeah, Josh," Daniel said as they started walking. "Why's he hanging back? Did our boys bust up the place that bad?"

"Yeah, what's up with him? He seemed cranky," Sam chimed in. Jake let out a half laugh, half sigh as he shook his head.

"He's fine, he's just..." Jake thought about it for a moment before settling on a diagnosis. "It was a hectic night and he's just sort of wound up. You know what I mean, Sam."

"I don't know, J, he seemed pissed at you."

"Whatever it is, don't get me involved," Danny interjected. Jake laughed.

"Dan, you schmoozed a mountain of tips for us tonight, Josh couldn't get pissed at you if he tried," Jake smiled, reaching past Sam to pat Daniel on the shoulder. "Sure you're not gonna leave your ol' captain behind to work for Josh?"

"Nah," Daniel said flippantly. "Although I admit it's very tempting."

Daniel gave Sam a private elbow to the ribs and Sam stumbled, glaring at him while Daniel gave him a wink.

"How did you get into the cargo biz, anyhow?" Sam asked as they turned onto their street.

For the first time, Daniel hesitated. If Sam didn't know any better, he'd think he exchanged a look with Jake, but it was over before he got the chance to figure out if it was the dim light playing a trick on his sleepy eyes.

"Well," Daniel started, knitting his eyebrows in thought. "It's a complicated answer. I needed a job but I knew that'd mean working at the schoolhouse in my hometown and I...I don't know. I wasn't sure if I was teacher material. I had bigger dreams. So, I hopped a boat and sailed away."

He smiled at that, looking down at his boots as they echoed over the cobblestone.

"I'm happy you did, Dan," Jake hummed as they approached the door. "I only wish we could've gotten our hands on you a little sooner. There were some keg shipments before your time that still haunt my dreams."

"You can probably lift those like a beer can," Sam blurted, allowing his thoughts to bleed through into his speech and immediately flushing hotly at it. Daniel and Jake looked at him in amusement as he tilted his face away to pat his pocket for his keys.

"You bet I do," Daniel agreed, a laugh tittering on the edge of his voice. "Come here and I'll lift you like a feather."

Sam squeaked out a protest and shimmied away from him. Daniel chuckled as Sam stuck his key in the door, scowling at Daniel over his shoulder as he opened the door and held it open for Jake to strut through.

"You two kill me," Jake teased, giving Daniel a side hug before strolling into the threshold of their home. "You want to come in for a nightcap?"

"I should turn in," Daniel declined politely, shyly rocking back on his heels. "But I'd love to come by sometime before we head out."

"We'd love that," Jake smiled, turning to Sam. "Wouldn't we, Sammy?"

"Sure," Sam agreed softly, not quite looking Daniel in the eye as he lingered in the doorway.

"Sure," Daniel mocked quietly, rolling his eyes and shaking his head with a smile on his face. "So enthusiastic. I feel sooo welcome."

"What's happened to your manners since I left?" Jake scolded Sam. "Sheesh."

"Sor-ry," Sam drawled, looking up at Daniel with a toothy grin. "Daniel, it would be ever so wonderful if you'd join us for a meal sometime."

"Why, thank you, Brandy," Daniel replied just as mockingly, dipping into a sarcastic curtsy before taking a step back. "Goodnight, you two. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Goodnight," Jake bid, raising a hand before heading off towards his room, his hat already off his head as he let out a deep sigh and disappeared into the dark house.

Sam stayed in the doorway for a second, stepping inside but looking over his shoulder one more time. Daniel gave him a little wave.

"What are you waiting for?" Daniel asked, raising his eyebrows with his hands deep in his pockets. "A goodnight kiss?"

Sam slammed the door behind him, locking it loudly. He heard Daniel's laugh muffled through the wood and Sam smiled bashfully at the sound, leaning his forehead against the door as he listened to Daniel walk away.

~~~~~

#gvf #greta van fleet #danny wagner #sam kiszka #myart #karoufiction #greta van fleet fanfiction #sweet lil sammy #danny the gentleman #and the twins....brothers of the year

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i-am-hoo-iyam · 1 year

Text

It’s the one peice au againnnnnn! Part two to my story (tldr part one papyrus saw a drowning person it wasn’t a drowning person it was a seal but he himself drowned ‘saving’ the seal and had to be rescued. He scared the he’ll out of his brother who thought he died. And blue wants to keep the deal as a pet and cash asked how much he could sell it for)

Blue comes out of sans room. “ so sans and papyrus are all chill now it’s ok to go talk to them sans promises to not throw any more swords at anyone and that I just caught him in a bad moment earlier. Anyways… I was gonna show him squishy! Hey where’d he go?” Red sighed. “Squishy ate a fish I fed him and then jumped back in the water on his own. Because he was a WILD ANIMAL. Look though! You can see him and his happy little friends at the happy little island razz is gonna park us at while we help happy little sans feel better after that happy little accident”. Blue started beaming as the sarcasm had flown right over his happy little head.

Stretch got out a fishing rod. “Here blue if you really want we can catch some fish to feed the seals. But I doubt they will eat from our hands so we should leave them on the beach for them to find. And red, take your attitude and shove it up your (butt). Sans is crying rn and papyrus is in medical need and CASH NO STOP NO CARCHONG THE SEALS EITH OUR ONLY GLOD FISHING NET never mind I’m goin back to my room.” Stretch wa socerwhelmed by all that was happening and retreated.

They anchored while their captain got better and razz came on deck for some fresh air as he was feeling a little dizzy. Blue jumped. “RAZZ WHEN WAS THE LAST TOME YOU ATE LR SLEPT? Cmon let’s go raid the kitchen and get you some food”. “Nah I’m fine.” “Cinimon! Does this dude look fine?” Cinimon looked over from where he was trying to bait a fishing rod. “He looks fine to me”. “Never mind everyone aways looks fine to you all he time”.

Blue helped cimnon bait the hook and cast the line. “Ok razz I’m gonna catch some fish and bear is gonna cook them and I’m gonna MAKE YOU EAT THEM”. “IM FINE” his stomach growled. “You are not.” Razz stormed off to his room and ran into bear who grabbed him and placed him back on the deck. “Not untill after you eat. Dinner should be in an hour depending on how lucky our fishermen are”.

Blue reeled in a tin can. Cash polished it up and got rid of the dent. “ hmm this is an antique limited edition can from a product that stopped selling years ago ( it was a regular can and had the date from a month ago carved in the side as the expiration). Yes yes this can is worth a lot of money”. He squirreled it away in his pockets.

Cinimon lost the bait and had to get a new one. Blue tried again and caught the back of his own pants. Cash took the rod and cast in the wrong spot and sent the line ashore and they had to drag it back. Cinimon inquired about blues pants. “Oh they’re somewhere in the ocean! Don’t worry I still have the pair with the hole in the knee!” Cash made blue go in his room and put them on before anyone else saw him.

Cash tried again and caught a board from the side of the ship after insisting the line was fighting so hard cuz it was ‘a big one’. Blue ran into reds room. ‘You ever heard of knockin?” “AHGTHPTHTHERESAPLANKMISSINGITCAMELOOSEANDTHEWATERSCOMINGINAND WEREALLGONNADIEANDIGIVEUPONFISHING”. “WHOA slow down. Hey the floor isn’t centered. Did you say a plank got loose? I better go patch the hole right away.”

Red went below deck and fixed the hole and brought the fish back from where it got in. “Well the ships a better fisher than you oafs! Here bear go prepare this one for razz hey where did he go? You idiots Gimmie that rod!” Red snatched the rod and cast it. “Hey how come I fished a pair of pants?” Blue got exited “ oh THOSE ARE MINE can I have them back”? “ ok but wah them before you wear them”.

Red cast again. “Lookie here! A nice ( insert saltwater fish here)! A big one too! And that, boys, is how you catch a fish.” Red cast again. Sans finally came out of his room. “Any Luck?” Blue hugged him “are you feeling any better? You were all out of sorts so we anchored on the island full of seals!” Cinimon chimed in “we had a lot of luck! First I got a rare limited edition can! Cash! Show him our find! And then I lost the bait! And then we caught blues pants! Then cash had a go and he was the luckiest he caught the entire island! After that he caught the ship! Red didn’t think that was a lucky catch. And then red caught two fish and a pair of pants!”

#undertale #ut #undertale au #one peice #one peice au #sans

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ezlebe · 2 years

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prompt - tom and greg get back together after breaking up

“Hey…” Tom says, leaning in, as a small, frenzied rabbit jumps around inside his ribs. “Hey, would you kiss me, right here, if I asked you to; if I told you to?”

“Would I kiss – ?” Greg stares like his namesake in the headlights, then blinks rapidly and rolls his eyes while sweeping hair across his ear with the hand not swathed in a glove. “I guess your… uh, humor is still kind of awful, eh, Tom?”

“And someone still can’t take a razz,” Tom says, realizing a bit late that the tone isn’t quite taunting enough, and tries to flatten it.

Greg offers a matching discontented press of his mouth, yanking his mitt off just to scratch anxiously under his nose. “This is… so awkward.”

“Yes, yes, it is,” Tom says, squeezing the glove on his own hand while sending a glance at Shiv across the field. “But these sorts of things happen when you refuse to talk about your family.”

“That’s not like true, at all,” Greg says, stiffly shaking his head, and now seeming determined not to look at anything, so his hands bear the brunt of his scowl. “These things like don’t happen? Like, who hits their last strike with their mom after a bunch of kidsjump them at an amusement park? Then is sent to like beg off a job from an uncle at – at his birthday party? And then like… huh, their ex is dating their cousin and, like, he’s there at this incredibly small event?”

Tom isn’t sure how to counter that concise little rant, nor what to do with the bubble of fondness bursting from under his sternum. A part of him wants to suppress it – it’s the same part of him that nearly went with Greg’s obvious plan upon making eye contact, then dropping eye contact, in the elevator to pretend they didn’t know each other, but it’s a small part. It’s easily shoved underneath the rest of him that is shrieking like a girl at a Beatles concert.

“And even if you knew, it – ” Greg shakes his head. “It’s not like that would’ve mattered.”

Tom is briefly startled by the bile in Greg’s voice, reflexively answering with his own venom. “I guess we can’t know, can we?”

“Like, come on,” Greg says, squeezing his hands around the mitt, until it nearly disappears between his plate-sized palms. “Shiv’s like… in magazines with the US President an-and has like seven houses. And like, Tom, we took a helicopter here?”

Tom loses some of that bitter steam in a bursting leak. He doesn’t particularly want to hear more of that tone, quickly turning sour, in Greg’s voice. “Who cares about that, huh? How’ve you been – how was Sorbonne,” He briefly considers elbowing Greg, just a bit, but keeps it to himself. “Did you ever find a mime?”

Greg shrugs and looks at the mitt in his hands, framing his fingers against the shape of it. “…It wasn’t that bad. I graduated pretty high up.”

“Oh, yeah?” Tom smiles wide before he can help it. “What was your thesis on?”

“The uh, shrinking agribusiness sector in Auvergne,” Greg mutters, quietly, dropping and shaking his head in a way that seems to be to put hair across his face.

“That sounds hideously boring,” Tom says, probably too brightly, and has to keep himself from demanding that Greg recite his presentation. He drops his voice a bit more, instead, tilting his head to a sarcastically curious angle. “Doesn’t explain why the fuck you’re trying to work at an amusement park?”

“The management program –”

Tom almost reaches out, but manages to stop his hand before it moves too far, abortedly putting it on a hip. “Greg.”

“I can’t really do job interviews,” Greg says, letting go of the mitt and rubbing at one of his brows with the knuckles of his fingers. “…Or get any. And you – uh, you were wrong about my grandpa; he still didn’t – doesn’tcare. He thinks no degree is worth anything, and didn’t… He won’t let me in.”

“I didn’t know he was Ewan Roy, Greg,” Tom says, exhaling a weak scoff, digging his hand into the glove. “I thought he was a normal grandpa who had an organic farm.”

Greg huffs but looks to silence himself with a bite at his lip, and shakes his head. “So. How was Hong Kong?”

“It was alright, though the work was sort of shit, but…” Tom shrugs and gestures outward with a turn of the glove, then takes a breath and looks back at Greg. “Oh, hey, I got a dog.”

“Yeah?” Greg says, briefly brightening, only to abruptly wilt and tense, elbows digging into his sides. “Like, with – uh, Shiv? Like, as a prep thing.”

Tom stares for a beat, feeling like his brain has just stalled midway through an intersection. “No – what? I got him in Hong Kong.”

“Oh,” Greg says, arms relaxing against his sides and raising his brows in interest. “Like, what kind?”

“Lab, as in he’ll eat anything you leave out,” Tom says, lifting a single shoulder, then gestures vaguely to the grass at their feet while recalling the memory of how he got Mondale. “But he’s not papered – has a pedigree written on the streets of a Kowloon. I found him in an alley and picked the poor little guy up.”

Greg stares for a beat, then slowly a corner of his mouth turns up, as he finally affords Tom a smile for the first time all afternoon. “You picked him up, Tom, like stole him?”

“He was a stray,” Tom insists, though it had occurred to him otherwise, as well, when he first hoisted Mondale up and stuffed him in his coat. “He needed a family. Or, well, it was just me, but you know what I mean.”

Greg drops his head in a nod, smile fading to answer with little more than a mutter. “Yeah, no – I do.”

“Ladies! Come on, stop gossiping,” Roman interrupts, voice pitching like a yowling siren across the field. “Or I’m going to put crying in baseball.”

“Softball,” Greg mutters, low and resentful in a way entirely, hilariously unfamiliar.

Tom quiets a bark of laughter in the back of his knuckles. God, he can’t even imagine having to put up with family visits with a child version of Roman.

“What happened?”

Tom rolls his eyes upward, then glances over to Kendall still sniping something at Connor, who ever so turns the other cheek. “I don’t have a medical degree, but seems like… we’re about to become characters in a Brothers Karamazov re-imagining.”

Greg sputters a choked laugh, which sort of makes it worth the hazard of Shiv overhearing the joke. “Jesus, Tom,” he mutters, hugging his jacket around himself with a glance at said kids berating the nursing staff. “That was so loud.”

“You probably already have more info on it than me,” Tom says, a bit ungraciously, checking his phone again for the text he’s supposed to get from Sarah regarding the supposed best neurologist in New York. “One of your favorite hobbies was sitting around and listening, wasn’t it?”

“I guess. Shit, this isn’t – ” Greg groans under his breath, then stands back up. “I’m going to call my mom.”

It’s an unexpectedly horrible feeling to have a ring sitting heavy in his pocket while looking at Greg Hirsch in a ratty green wind breaker, furrowing his brow in that endearing way down at a cheap little phone, and being conscious of the fact it’s not for him. He shouldn’t even want it to be for Greg – their breakup was amicable, on the surface, but it wasn’t great on Tom’s end. He wanted Greg to succeed, and thrive, and blossom into the sly little business freak that sometimes popped up in the papers he used to make Tom edit, but he also wanted to keep him in a box. He wanted Greg to call him every day, and write him letters or emails, and keep him updated on every stupid fucking thing he did, but… But Tom broke it off clean, and said some things he didn’t particularly believe about their potential future, so Greg took a box out of Tom’s place and across the ocean, while Tom sold that place and moved across the other ocean, and became such a sad sack that he maybe stole a puppy.

Tom probably shouldn’t propose to Shiv, not now, if someone else can make him feel more insane than her while she’s still in the same room. Hell, maybe he never should have bought the ring – he was thinking only yesterday, in a fond, slightly sore way how Greg would’ve hated the stepped levels in the living area where Tom is staying in with Shiv. And the height of the shower head, which is about at Tom’s nose; and the cracked number four in the elevator – bad luck, Tom imagined telling him.

It has been five years, but he still has so many of those intrusive little Greg-thoughts; he almost wants to write them down to confront Greg, just to get some answers on them. Did he hate the new Star Wars, or the new name packaging on Coke; how did he feel about that thing with the mummy crypt, or the hadron collider, or the ancient cheese in Egypt?

He manages to distract himself for a few minutes with a magazine, but looks over when he hears Greg getting into it with Marcia, in a way, fumbling over two seats to try to convince her that he got a job from his uncle. He watches in something like embarrassment, even though Greg hasn’t been his to be embarrassed over, and never really was like that, in half a decade.

It’s less of a surprise than it should be, all the same, when Greg bee-lines over to Tom after he’s been dismissed to gather some shoes.

“Hey, so,” Greg whispers, wetting his lips with a few glances sideways at the huddled rest of the family. “I’m not like – uh, like trying to fall back into patterns of behavior consistent with – ”

“Just say you need money for cab fare; Christ on a cracker, Greg.”

“It’s just because your, uh – ” Greg shrugs, tight, gesturing vaguely at the hallway he’d disappeared into earlier for his call. “Your girlfriendsort of stole my last twenty.”

Tom nearly flinches at the emphasis, then frowns hard. “Your last twenty?”

“Yeah, my – ” Greg shrugs, hands twisting in his coat. “Uh, my mom cut me off. Like for real.”

Tom flattens his lips, glancing over toward Shiv looming over a pouting Roman, then reaches backward for his wallet. He pulls out a card, waving it under Greg’s nose with a pointed lift of a brow.

“Tom, you don’t – ”

Tom interrupts with a dismissive tut. “Look, starling, just take the card and get your uncle’s shoes – and maybe a sandwich, because you’re obviously feeling real hangry. You can return it when you circle back.”

Greg abruptly looks actuallyangry for a pair of beats – his eyes going big and indignant, expression freezing stiff in a resentful moue.

Tom raises his brows, bemused, “Seriously, it’s fine.”

“No, yeah – I, I can,” Greg snaps, snatching them card out of Tom’s hand with a marked white knuckle grip. “Thanks.”

Tom stares after until Greg is out the double doors, Roman bizarrely after him, then all at once realizes what he’s said, sitting hard into a chair while mortified heat floods his face and his gut twists into a knot. Fuck. He’ll be lucky if he gets that card back – not that it matters, he would keep paying it, too, which is just pathetic. It would be worth too much to stop; how could he deprive himself some opportunity to look at a statement and know Greg was out there eating or buying a nice coat.

He shifts his jaw, then straightens the magazine in his hands, flopping it open to stare across the pages. He scans his eyes across an article on autumnal browns, sweaters and coats galore, then turns the page, then another, pretending to care about the clothes. He finds himself stopping at an ad for perfume, scent faded to nothing, where a woman in a wedding gown peeks coyly over a shoulder.

He looks over at Shiv, as the ring weighs heavy in his pocket and really feels like the last thing he could need in his life. The future he fantasized about and built up with her – a nice house, a kid or two, a high position at WayStar while she tramples politics into shape – it seems to be shrinking in the distance of his rear view. He would’ve done it, certainly, but between Greg showing up and her father near death, all he has is a couple glaring signs that he might want to look at a map and figure out where he’s actually going.

“What’s up?” Shiv asks, walking over after seeming to notice the staring, then raising a brow high up her forehead. “Oh, and Rome said he saw you just gave our weird cousin your blackcard? You don’t even know him.”

“I do, actually,” Tom corrects, a bit quick, trying to beat back a flare of heat against his neck. She knows some of his dating history, but no names, and he’s not sure he wants to know how she would react, if her first adjective for Greg is weird, rather than the more obvious tall. “Before I took the offer to Hong Kong with Waystar, I was doing some contract work with EMCO. He was in school at Western.”

“Oh,” Shiv intones, then scoffs under her breath with a look toward the sliding doors. “Nuts.”

Tom takes a beat to ready an innocuous question that feels like a choice. “Can I have his money?”

Shiv raises her brows. “What?”

“He loaned you a twenty?”

“Oh,” Shiv says, eyes rolling and digging into her pocket. She drops change and a few crumpled bills into his hand with a low scoff under her breath. “Jesus, Tom, who cares?”

“Obviously, I kind of do,” Tom says, straightening the bills out, then folding them against his fingers. “I’ll get it back to him. How’s your dad?”

“They’re moving him to a new room,” Shiv says, a slight turn to her nose that reads as irked, unhappy it’s taken so long, despite the relative few hours since the stroke.

Tom slips the money into his front pocket. “The watch didn’t impress him much, did it?”

“Not really, no,” Shiv says, a wan smirk briefly peeking at the corner of her mouth. “But you didn’t exactly stick the landing, either, Wambsgans.”

Tom had all but fumbled the watch at Logan, forgetting his prepared quip, too distracted by the revelation of Greg Hirsch looming at the edge of every conversation. He can’t really admit that to her, though, not yet. “I had other things on my mind.”

Shiv scoffs loud. “Like what?”

“Like.” Tom shrugs, turning his head with an imploring look upward. “…Do I really need to impress him?”

Shiv raises her brows with a bemused blink. “What?”

Tom presses his mouth into a flat line, then forces himself to continue to spite the little box of minor fortune in his pocket. “Do you see this – us – going somewhere where I’d need to impress him?”

“I don’t know, Tom,” Shiv says, all but recoiling into herself with a glance over her shoulder at her family. “Is that really the point right now? He could be dying.”

“I know, I know,” Tom says, reaching up and running a pair of fingers against the edge of his hairline. “I’m sorry.”

“And why can’t we just – ” Shiv lowers her voice, glancing again toward her brothers with a quick jerk of her shoulders. “Have fun while it lasts? I like hanging out with you, you know that, so who cares about where it’s going – whatever that means.”

“Right,” Tom says, feeling a bit sucker punched in the solar plexus. He just got his answer, didn’t he? “Yeah.”

Tom stands to follow her and the others to Logan’s new room, a giant-size thing with a sitting area and a glass partition from the bed; it looks like something they’d give a sitting president. He watches her immediately get into a spat with her brothers, as he takes in the place, and catches a cakebox in the corner. He quirks a brow, then looks across the room to Marcia, who drops her head in a small nod.

Later, after the Roy siblings have seen to take their arguments elsewhere, Tom looks up from his newest magazine when the door opens, then up, watching Greg hustle with the slippers toward Logan’s bed. He feels his fingers twitch into the pages in his hands, an urge to get up and stop him from going anywhere only barely restrained. He drops his eyes when Greg turns back around, ostensibly going for the door again without even a greeting, only to stop at it with his hand on the handle.

“You know, Tom, I –” Greg takes a breath, giving Tom some additional time to attempt to bring together the apology he’s been working on for over two hours. “I like, I don’t think I would’ve even finished at Western without you there, an-and around, but I never – I don’t think I thanked you?”

Tom stares for a beat, taken aback, then rolls his eyes and drops the magazine to the table. He’s not sure what this is about, but best to nip it in the bud. “Don’t exaggerate,” he says, exhaling a harsh breath through his nose. “I helped you out with a couple statements, at most.”

“No, not like that – I-I mean I was going to drop out,” Greg says, turning his head with a flat twist of a frown at the corner of his mouth. “I was like… totally just overwhelmed? And going to do it, even though I only had a semester left, but then you kind of made it seem like I could. Saying all that stuff. And then with applying to Sorbonne, too? No one else even cared, like I barely cared? But... you thought I could do it.”

“No, I knew you could,” Tom says, standing from the sofa and crossing the room with a spare glance toward the bed and Marcia on the other side of the glass. He leans up into Greg’s face, just a bit, raising his brows while wishing he wasn’t feeling too much of a coward to touch him. “I am so fucking proud of you, Greg. The fact I don’t even know half the words in your thesis is tremendous to me.”

Greg blinks rapidly, looking down at his fingers twisting together in front of him. “Tom.”

“Look, I have no clue what kind of job you even want, but I can make sure you get it,” Tom says, offer punching out of him with a tone of desperation that he hopes Greg can’t hear or won’t care to, “I’ll call my lawyer; she’s defended half the shitty agricultural corps in the Midwest looking to fuck the little guy over. Or the little guy, if you prefer. You don’t need to be groveling to – ” He drops his voice with a pointed raise of his brows. “A literal braindead tycoon when you’ve got an MBA from France.”

Greg huffs a weak laugh. He doesn’t look back at Tom, but neither does he leave, and gradually it becomes clear he’s working up to opening his mouth to ask something painful. “I kinda was also wo-wondering if have you – um, ever regretted how…” He shakes his head with a tight swallow. “What happened? With like the us of it.”

“It was realistic,” Tom says, carefully wetting his lips, watching Greg cringe outright and immediately regretting the choice to be blunt. “It made sense. It was arguably better for both of us… But did – do I regret it? I think – It may be one of my biggest regrets, yeah, Greg. I can’t actually… think of anything else I regret more than reconciling to some life where I wouldn’t get to see you.”

“I came up with like a thousand reasons not to do it that way, like long distance or whatever, but… uh, couldn’t like say any of them,” Greg says, then goes pinched and reticent for a few long beats. “I – I thought you just – ” He shakes his head, worrying his lip sore between his teeth. “You just didn’t like me, anymore? Or maybe… ever did.”

Tom can’t help but offer a somewhat mangled laugh. “No, Greg, I…” He stares across Greg’s downturned face, resistance to the truth crumbling, as Shiv telling him they’re just having fun echoes weak against Greg saying now, after years, how he still wishes it had been different. “From the moment I met you, I knew I was never going to get you out of my head.”

“You… Never?” Greg repeats, visibly swallowing, as he looks up at Tom with red-rimmed eyes under his bangs.

Tom tentatively reaches out and sets a hand atop Greg’s fretting fingers, feeling them go still under his palm. “Never.”

#tomgreg #i call this a butterfly effect fic #i couldnt do a bad breakup #excuse toms behavior in that he doesnt have all the shiv trauma yet so he had a moment of if you love it let it go for five seconds

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softluci · 3 years

Text

aggressive affection, i think

(part two here!)

[ @yourlocalsinnamonroll (hi!) sent me an ask to do more gen z headcanons and i started working on something for her, except it isn’t actually a set of headcanons, but rather a really long...one-shot? but anyway, i thought of actual headcanons that i can share now, so i can return to my ROOTS hopefully this will do in the meantime. ]

i’m not sure if this is something unique to younger people, but i am one hundred percent sure that younger people do it a lot, just going off of the behavior of my friends and i. (i’m gonna tell you now that this isn’t entirely sfw, so minors dni please and thank u)

but i’ve found that it’s pretty common for friends to be, like, aggressively affectionate with one another, for lack of a better phrase. if not aggressively affectionate, then just really flirtatious, often for no reason, and it is still meant entirely in a platonic sense. some examples of this that i have experienced include, but are not limited to:

“i’m gonna eat you,” “do u wanna make out,” “just remember, no matter WHAT happens, i will ALWAYS wanna make out with you,” “i have literally wanted to fuck all of you at some point,” “let’s have sex,” “stfu before i kiss you,” [points to lap] “is this seat taken?” “every day i’m like, ‘wow, [name] is so cool, we should make out,’” and so on and so forth.

so you can imagine the fun i’m about to have.

lucifer

“blindsided,” does not even begin to describe what you’ve done to this man. while his recovery time was quick, he was still so, so confused.

all he said was, “you look nice today,” why did you threaten to kiss him? was that even a threat?

he doesn’t know because you said, “stop before you get kissed on the mouth,” but it doesn’t matter because you failed to consider that he is obsessed with you in dire need of a kiss on the mouth, and you, silly thing that you are, just provided conditions under which he can get one.

that said, have fun trying to explain to this man that you were joking while he’s holding you against him with the most smug look on his dumb little face. if you don’t wanna kiss him, okay, but by the time he feels like letting you go, your face is gonna be scorching and you will have properly learned not to do that again. unless you enjoyed yourself, in which case—

by the way, if you believe in a higher power, you had better pray he doesn’t do this to you because now that you’ve planted the idea in his villainous little brain, he’s just biding his time. so the next time you compliment him innocently, and he says, “be quiet before i kiss you,” like the monster he is, assert your dominance by kissing him first, it’s the only way to maintain your dignity.

mammon

why would you do that to him. he is literally in love with you, you can’t be doing this. he knows he’s an attractive person, but you can’t tell him that, and you especially can’t do it by flirting with him, it’s embarrassingly disarming. especially since he was going to make fun of you once he saw that you were looking at the issue of majolish with him on the cover. he had a plan and everything, and you ruined it. he was gonna say something dumb cool, after which you would be embarrassed , and he would laugh.

but then you looked at him, said, “i’m gonna eat you,” and his entire plan was thwarted. now you have to stand there and watch him struggle to form a sentence while his face gets red. you should take this opportunity to bite him, give him a little nom on the shoulder or something, just to razz him. it’ll be great, i promise.

luckily, he can’t even think about doing this to you without having to lie down, so you should be safe—unless, of course, he catches both you and himself by surprise. so if you get nommed on, you had it coming.

levi

you menace. you absolute villain. you’re laughing.

levi was about to go into a match he was nervous about, and then you said, “it’s okay, no matter what happens, i will always wanna make out with you,” and then he dropped his controller and blacked out, and you’re laughing.

you’re terrible. absolutely awful. acquaint yourself with shame while you blow cool air into his face and shake him awake.

when he does wake up, and he reminds you that he’s the avatar of envy, do nawt be surprised.

try to explain to him that you were kidding and let it slip that you say these types of things to everyone and you’re getting a tail around your waist. no matter how much he might stutter while he makes his point, the fact remains that he’s the only one you’re allowed to say these things to now. you can do it to the others while he’s not around if you feel so inclined, but he’s going to find out eventually, so good luck explaining yourself while he doesn’t keep his tail still when he uses it to hold you in place.

your only saving grace here is that he is physically incapable of doing it to you, but, you know. that probably gets overridden by how possessive he’s gonna get.

satan

you’re deranged. or just really confident. or a fool. it doesn’t matter, you fucked up. he said a normal thing, and then you threw him for a loop.

you were nervous about an exam the next day, he said, “you’re a capable person, you have nothing to be worried about.”

and then you, evidently forgetting that he is not one of your human friends, said, “flattery will get you made out with,” and tried to walk away.

first of all, how was that flattery? he was stating a fact. second of all, who said he didn’t wanna make out with you🤨. he never said that, you are making assumptions about him and his character.

anyway, he has no idea where you think you’re going, but you didn’t make it very far before he caught up to you anyway.

when he repeats what you said back to you in the form of a question, with that deceptively polite look on his face, know that he is being rhetorical. do not bother trying to explain yourself, it’ll be difficult to do so in a convincing manner while he’s backing you up to the nearest wall. do not be surprised when he takes this opportunity to blindside you with praise, directly into your ear, with that fatally smooth voice of his. and do NAWT be surprised when he pulls back and says, “why am i not being made out with?” with a dumb little smile. it brings him a lot of joy to see you squirm.

you don’t even have a saving grace here. this man is ruthless, he’s gonna do this to you literally whenever he wants, and he won’t even let you look away, let alone run away, so find joy in the monster you have created.

asmo

listen. unless you are genuinely empty headed, there is absolutely no way you did this on accident.

he wasn’t even doing anything out of character either, it was the middle of self-care night, he was putting moisturizer on your face for you, and he went, “you’re even cuter up close,” which is a normal, tame thing for him to say.

so unless you just have uncontrollable knee-jerk reactions, no way did you say, “so make out with me then,” to this man, by accident.

you’re lucky he has some knowledge of the fact that you sometimes say things that aren’t smart, so he didn’t just immediately jump on you; however, you are by no means in the Clear.

you blinked and he was nose to nose with you and basically in your lap. now you have to deal with his wandering hands while you try and explain yourself—that is, if you can even overcome how flustered you are, which you probably can’t. luckily, he knows you probably didn’t mean it, but he’s still asmo, so he takes it upon himself to be respectfully heinous like the gentleman he is.

so when he somehow manages to get even closer to you and says, “honey, you should really get a handle on those impulses of yours, unless you plan on following through,” like the bastard he is, know that from that point forward, whatever happens is on you.

here is another man with whom you have no saving grace; now that you’ve given him the idea that he can be more explicit with you,,, well.

beel

you’re a heathen. why would you do something like this. well, you know what, maybe you aren’t that much of a heathen, considering that you did bake cookies for him. that was really sweet of you, so he thanked you and complimented your skill, like a regular person.

so why, exactly, did you say, “i only accept thanks in the form of kisses, preferably with tongue,” ? something is genuinely not right with you.

now you have this man standing there, confused and red in the face. he’s trying to do the math, and nothing is adding up. like, it’s definitely doable, he can definitely do that, but, like, why would you make this request so suddenly?

this is probably the only instance in which you can coherently say, “i was kidding, you don’t actually have to do that,” and it almost doesn’t work.

you absolutely should not have been leaning against the counter because now he’s standing in front of you, and you have nowhere to run.

however, the thing about beel is that he is someone who flusters people without meaning to, so he has no idea of the effect that his, “are you sure?” has on you.

luckily, you’re still mostly coherent because you know that beel isn’t heinous like his brothers, so you manage to tell him that he doesn’t have to kiss you if he doesn’t want to because you were kidding.

you have every right to be surprised when, all of a sudden, you’re sitting on the counter, and he says, “why do you think i don’t want to?”

do you have a saving grace with this man? kind of. he would never say what you said or something similar, but the next time he compliments you and you choose to be normal and say, “thank you,” he’s gonna ask if he should kiss you, so try not to collapse.

belphie

now. he isn’t the Worst Person you could’ve done this with. but by god you are out of your mind.

your first mistake was choosing to lie down next to him, not because you had plans to be a menace, but because he is always a menace and has a thing for reminding you, which he can do more easily when you’re in proximity to him.

so when he said, out of nowhere, “are you ticklish?” you should’ve just rolled away, which wouldn’t have worked, but it would have been less chaotic then saying, “you are legally required to make out with me before you try and find out.”

you said it so casually that he was almost stunned into staying still, but his recovery time was excellent.

the next thing you knew, you were laying underneath a very smug, very menacing man, who seemed entirely too prepared to listen to what you had to say for once.

“legally?”

okay, so, maybe you should’ve chosen your words more carefully, but he was seconds away from tickling you, so you didn’t exactly have time to defend yourself. you can never backtrack with belphie anyway, so it makes sense that you went headlong into your claim, telling him that yes, this is, in fact, the law of the land.

“i was never one to pay attention to the law, but since you’re being so insistent, i guess i don’t really have a choice—”

leave it to him to pretend like you’re a burden as if he isn’t literally head over heels in love with you like everyone else fond of you. bastard.

there is absolutely nothing to save you from this man. he isn’t tactful enough to wait for an opportunity to do this to you, like satan or lucifer, so expect to be Just Sitting There when he tells you that you’re required to make out with him right this instant—it’s the law.

#obey me!#obey me #obey me headcanons #obey me imagines #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me levi #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmo #obey me asmodeus #obey me beel #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphie #obey me belphegor

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starkjoy · 2 years

Note

Are you the author of the lovely fic Devil’s Advocates? Just wanted to say I love it very much!!❤️ This is not to put any pressure on you or anything and I understand if you don’t plan on writing more chapters but if you do, I am very excited to read more of it❤️❤️ Have a good day!!

I am indeed the author! I'm writing the next chapter as we speak, and as a thank you for your kindness (and everyone else's who've sent me messages like this), here's a small wip sneak preview.

Read below:

Frowning, Tom cocks his head. “Are you busy with something else?” he questions, suddenly on guard. He can imagine it now, Greg avoiding his eyes as he admits, “So, I actually met with my cousins and we brokered a deal? But um, you’re not part of it?” Or worse: “I’m in love with a girl I met yesterday at the HR mixer, so this narrative won't work for me after all. Good luck.”

“No, no. I’m ready,” the younger brunette quickly recovers, another weird smile on his lips. “Our calendars are blocked and loaded.” He points his index finger like a gun, cocking it and mimicking a kill shot at the Rubik’s Cube on his desk. He shifts again, clears his throat. “Come in.”

Tom accepts the answer after a moment’s scrutiny. “Good,” he says before reaching out into the hallway and rolling his secret weapon into the office: a large whiteboard he’d snagged from the neighboring conference room. He shuts the door behind him, locks it just in case.

Greg shifts. “What’s that for?”

“Did you black out from the wine, Gregory? We have a big day tomorrow.”

“Of course, but why do we uh, need a whiteboard?”

“Need a demonstration, do you?” Tom picks up one marker from the bottom tray and unsnaps its lid. He turns toward the board, back facing Greg, and writes. “See, here we can document our hearts’ desires with gliding ease,” he instructs with a condescending lilt like a professor scratching out an advanced equation for an audience of toddlers. He turns around, gesturing to his finished work: CAN’T MAKE A TOMLETTE WITHOUT BREAKING A FEW GREGGS.

“This again—”

“But wait!” he interrupts like an infomercial’s worst salesman. “The real magic?” Tom grabs the eraser brick from the tray, replacing it with the marker, and then disappears the text with one long swipe. “Gone into the ether! No paper trail, no email chains. A temporary haven without risk of Congress, the DOJ, or any other governing body finding our receipts.”

“I know how a whiteboard works, Tom.”

He feigns confusion. “Well, you’re the one who asked what it's for.”

“I didn’t mean—,” Greg stops himself and spreads his lips in a thin line. “You’re razzing me,” he confirms rather than asks.

Tom smirks, satisfied, and stuffs his hands in his slack pockets. He cocks his head. “Yes. But no, actually. I’m going to quiz you on our timeline and write it down on the board for our reference. Then we can run through a few more times until we’re feeling good, yeah?”

Greg nods, eyes flitting away from Tom’s and zoning out a bit. Social awkwardness is par the course for the leggy brunette, but something about his detached demeanor compared to last night’s casual intimacy sends a chill down Tom’s spine. Perhaps his earlier assessment was all wrong—maybe their little tête-à-tête made Greg like him less. Maybe Greg’s enacting one big long con against Tom, chasing the promise of a fancy promotion and cushy office, dreaming of some vapid heiress to entrap with his old-money heritage and gaudy, newfound riches. Tom’s always loved his protege’s slimy moments, those little testaments to his influence taking hold, evidence that the younger man trusts him enough to reveal his ugliest colors. This time, however? The scenario, even dreamt, makes him sick to his stomach.

Tom swallows. “What is it, Greg?”

His friend blinks, returning his gaze. “Oh, nothing. Sorry. I’m fine and dandy, all’s good in the hood. I don’t know if ‘hood’ is an appropriate term for me to be using, actually, but since my office is a refurbished mailroom, it could be considered the ‘hood’ of Waystar, I guess? Refurbished may be generous, it’s pretty uh, un-furbished, if you will? Never furbished to begin with—”

“Okay, stop,” Tom interrupts. He steps toward Greg, pulls out the chair facing his desk, and sits down. “Tell me what’s going on.”

Greg stares at him with his big, blue eyes. “Nothing, man.”

“You’re squirming like a virgin hiding his first boner and rambling like a coked up parakeet. Did something happen after last night? Did the siblings reach out to you? Logan?”

“No! No, I haven’t heard anything.” Greg’s dark brows furrow over his down-turned blues, again evading Tom’s stare. “It’s not that.”

Tom inhales, preparing himself for whatever blow comes next. “So what is it, Greg?”

#tomgreg #my fic #sneak peek #anon #ask #devil's advocates

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wiypt-writes · 3 years

Text

Rock ‘n’ Roll People In A Disco World

Part 1- Disco Down

Intro: It's range day. SWAT vs LAPD Special Crimes branch. You and your finance decide to have a bit of fun with the interdepartmental competition.

Pairing: Paul Diskant x Reader

Warnings: Bad language, Smut (NSFW, 18+)

Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar the reader and any other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.

A/N: So yeah, I started another series. Bad WIYBUPT. But there aint enough Disco out there so I thought I’d rectify that situation. This is also another entry for @imanuglywombat ‘s “Is That Even A Sex Position” weekly challenge. This position is called “Juicy Ass”. See here for more information.

Rock ‘n’ Roll People Masterlist // Main Masterlist

It was early in the morning, the first warm rays of the LA sunshine had barely begun warming the pavement when the two of you had started your day. Paul was already pouring you both coffee to go as you met him in the kitchen, dressed in your Swat training tee, utility pants and standard issue uniform boots, hair French braided back. You smirked at the dapper young detective before you, slacks, dress shoes, button down and tie.

It'd been a gruelling last few weeks for you both. You were working a SWAT case with your unit and Paul was busy working an LAPD Vice officer's homicide. He would trudge in late at night, either from the precinct or more recently from a night out with Vice following some leads. You were always already asleep and he didn't want to wake you. He'd kiss you softly, shower, kiss you again and crawl into bed, hugging you close.

Now, you were both getting ready to head out, finally having slept in the same bed together for the first time in weeks. Given your nature, the two of you were playfully squabbling over the upcoming late afternoon's task, a joint fire arms training session between your unit, LAPD SWAT and Paul's unit. The joint time spent at the range always turned into pool of who'd win and, usually, was too close to call rounding off with each team going head to head in a final duel.

And things were getting competitive in the Diskant home.

"If I can make it," Paul grumbled, "we should sweeten the deal."

"You'll make it.” You popped a shoulder. “Paul Diskant doesn't miss a day at the range, nor friendly competition. So, name your terms?" You smirked mischievously over the rim of your mug, watching him adjust his tie.

"Winner gets a favor." Paul devilishly replied.

"What kind of favor?" You played along and the look on his face already made your insides squirm as he raised a brow and curled his lips further in his smirk. "Paul!"

"Y/N!" Paul mimicked, cutting the distance between you, big hands on your hips, thumbs rubbing along your shirt. "Baby, it's been days. This Vice case has me pulled away longer than I have been since I was a beat cop."

You rolled your eyes and wrapped your arm around his shoulder, fingers grazing the point where the short hairs of his buzz-cut met his neck.

“Fine." You kissed him deeply, the taste of coffee on both your tongues but something that was just him too. "We'll call it a bonus." “Bonus...” he nodded. “I can run with that.”

“You couldn’t run a fucking bath, Disco.” "Oh Sweetheart, you're on." The challenge in his voice and mischief in his eyes lit a fire under you. You kissed him again and moved away, a swift smack from his hand to your ass made you yip but you kept walking.

****

The drive into the station was quiet, you reading over your training schedule for the day and Paul driving. The only sound that filled the vehicle was the sound of him humming along to the radio, thumb tapping along to the beat of the song on his steering wheel, before you heard him let out a loud sigh.

"I have some stuff to chase down this morning but if nothing pans out, I should be at the range with the rest of my unit."

"Well, then I'll hope it doesn't pan out, just so I can kick your ass with my Glock," you chuckled as he let out a groan.

"Baby, you know, watching you handle that Glock and riffle makes me horny as fuck right? Nothing like a woman that can shoot," Paul admitted. He took your left hand away from the file and pressed his lips to the top of it. He knew why you did it, but he still hated not seeing your diamond flashing on your finger all day.

"Oh yeah?" You turned your standard issued sunglass covered eyes to him, "is that why you wanted to marry me?"

Paul chortled, “one reason among the many."

He pulled into the carport and parked in his designated spot. You exited the vehicle and gathered your bag from the popped trunk.

"See you at the range, don't be late, or I'll have to listen to Rodriguez bitch as she drives me home." You gave him a teasing kiss and slung your bag over your shoulder, walking away.

"Hey, Y/N?" He called after you. You stopped and turned around to look at him, lifting your sunglasses to the top of your head. "Don’t waste too much energy today, huh? You’re gonna need all the strength you have tonight, Baby."

You chuckled to yourself, "Just show up, we'll talk energy later," you rolled your eyes and walked off, flipping him the bird over your shoulder.

The scorching sun boiled across the training facility tucked between the hills of the valley, away from the hustle of the city and just far enough out of reach for civilians. Abandoned buildings and, green fields and a simulated neighborhood made up the grand, multi-million dollar facility. You and your team had been at it all morning, moving through the buildings in full tactical gear and safety equipment. Together you cleared buildings, fired upon fake assailants and suspects. You and your partner, Alma Rodriguez, even hit the weights and boxing bags to keep loose after a hand to hand session against Everett and Evans. To keep your trigger fingers hot and ready, you played a round of long range sniper poker, you of course beating the team with a straight flush, bullets hitting their targets dead center.

It was the last hours of daylight by the time Special Branch showed up and you couldn't help but smirk as you watched Paul set up his gear from across the field. Long gone were his slacks and tie, and now, he was dressed in a tight black tee with the edges of his two bicep tattoos peeking out from the hem, and uniform issue pants and boots, his wrap arounds shielding those beautiful blues you loved getting lost in.

You smirked as the two of you locked glances, his smile forming across plump lips. A cocky flick of his head was sent in your direction and you laughed, pulling a hundred dollar bill from your pocket and slapping it flat against the table.

The competition started, pairing SWAT members against Specials, two by two until both your captains were the final two.

"Shooters on the line," the facility command officer called. Each shooter stepped up, readying their rifles. Your team lined up behind your boss, Paul and his desk buddies watching from their side. "Stand by... Ready..." The whistle sounded and the first shots at their prospective targets were fired.

Firing judges followed behind each shooter, judging accuracy, safety and protocol. Three rifle shots fired down range and the shooters tossed their weapons to the side, tucking and rolling one roll with their hand on their pistol all while watchful eyes looked on. Your boss didn't roll, but Paul's did and the snickering started from Special Branch. It didn't deter your focus as you watched your boss, Captain Rogers, finish the round. Three shots fired at metal targets, each one going down in accuracy, then a clip reload and three more shots fired at a close range target before the commanding judge asked both men to put their weapons on safe and holster them. He approached each target for accuracy and declared Paul's boss, Captain Wilson, the winner of the round. That brought the two teams to a tie.

The Detectives cheered and razzed SWAT but both captains settled their groups down. The field judge confirmed the tie in the competition and groans sounded from both teams.

"I'll tell you what, I'll toss in an extra two hundred bucks to pit Y/L/N against your pick," Rogers held two one hundred dollar bills up, handing them over to the field judge for safe keeping.

"Alright, I see your two and raise two," Captain Wilson held out his bills, "for Diskant to take that challenge."

"Oooooooh", both teams razzed the real life couple.

You couldn’t help the smirk on your face as one of Paul’s colleagues piped up that this could back fire spectacularly as would Paul really want to risk pissing off the woman who controlled his sex life.

“That’s exactly why he wants to win,” you jibed back, causing him to roll his eyes and scoff, “because his sex life is on the line if he doesn’t.”

More laughter rang out across the area as Paul merely shrugged, a smile flickering across his face as you heard Rogers speak loudly to Wilson from behind you.

“Between us, two hundred on my girl to blow your man outta the water."

Paul leaned down, to whisper into your ear, a smirk plying on his lips, "something's gonna get blown."

"What was that?" You coyly played.

“Sure you wanna do this?” He asked, turning to look at you, his brow arched. “I mean you could just forfeit now and save yourself the embarrassment.”

You held his gaze for a moment before you made a show of dragging your eyes down his body, your gaze lingering on his crotch as if you were contemplating his offer, before you raised your head, your tongue poking out from between your lips a little.

“Did you forget to zip up?" You asked. Paul gave a start, his head jerking down to look at his ‘piece’ so to speak, and at that moment the whistle was blown to start.

The first shots were fired, Paul's just seconds behind yours. Tucking behind the mailboxes for your next shot, you nailed your target and moved forward to fire your final rifle round, using a metal barrel as your cover. You laid your riffle to rest, took a few steps, tucked your chin and rolled, planting your feet and rising up to draw your personal firearm. Poised for your next quick shot behind a mock window frame, you fired at the target and moved on, Paul's form in your peripheral, matching you shot for shot. Coming around the frame you fired a walking shot at your next target and then took your place at the final marker, firing away before the expected reload and emptying your clip into the standing paper target with his hostage.

"Safety on... Holsters." The range judge called after he blew his whistle. You and Paul followed his commands and waited as he examined your individual targets. It was close, you knew it. Paul was an excellent shot.

You watched as the judge looked over Paul's target first, poking his finger through two holes in the face before moving on to yours. You nailed your target, all three shots hitting the suspect. One dead shot to the center of his head, the other in the chest and the last in the torso.

"Here's your winner," the judge declared, pointing at your target.

Cheers began to ring out and you heard Paul groan loudly, turning to you. "You cheated.”

"I guess the favor's on you," You quipped as behind him you saw Captain Rogers holding his hand out, ready to receive the cash prize from Wilson.

“You still cheated.”

“I did no such thing!” You scoffed.

“You distracted me.” He folded his arms across his chest, a sullen pout on his handsome face.

“Well, you should know better than to take your eye off the target, Disco,” you smirked and he narrowed his eyes playfully. “On second thought, I think I will let Rodriguez take me home. Burgers and beer on you. Don't forget the extra pickles."

He smirked, his lips brushing yours as he spoke, "come on, ride back with me, I'll make it worth your while."

"Erm, unless I'm mistaken you just lost so..." You popped a shoulder, your eyes not leaving his as you began walking backwards away from him. "I'm in charge."

“I want a divorce.” He shot back and you laughed, shaking your head.

“We’re not married yet, hot shot.” You winked.

“Details.” He waved his hand and you snorted, before you turned and jogged to catch up with your colleagues.

*****

As per your instructions, Paul didn’t forget the extra pickles and later that evening the pair of you were sat on the sofa in your comfy clothes, food and beer in hand as you lounged back watching a film on the Television. You stole a glance at your fiancé for a moment, his sharp profile illuminated in the soft light of the lamp to his right. He really was incredibly handsome, and you often wondered daily how the hell you’d gotten so lucky, as he could have had his pick of women, they tended to fall at his feet wherever you went. But he’d chosen you. Not only that, he’d pursued you. It had taken him a good few weeks after you’d both met on a case when he was in Uniform to finally accept his offer of a date. The dates had continued, and six months later you’d moved in together, and a year or so after that, he’d gotten down on one knee in the middle of your apartment and asked you to be his wife.

Which, reminded you of something you’d heard before.

With a smirk you turned your attention back to the film, took another bite of your burger before you spoke, your tone light and airy.

"So... strippers huh?"

Paul hastily swallowed his food and turned to look at you. "What?"

"Nothing, just typical."

"No, what?" He chuckled.

"I just heard one of the guys before commenting about how the wedding is getting closer so the stag do needs planning. The words Vegas and strippers were mentioned. Several times"

"Fucking Adler, man," he shook his head, dropping his empty burger container into the paper bag on the table in front of you.

“So you are going to Vegas, then?” You shoved another fry in your mouth to stop the smirk from spreading at the teasing.

"Uh, yeah," his reply was nonchalant, but he rubbed at his neck in that way he always did when he was a little nervous or uncomfortable. His big tell.

"Right. And there will be strippers?”

“Yes, there PROBABLY will be strippers." He side eyed you a little as he reached for his beer, the faint flush of red visible on the back of his neck as you took the final bite of your food.

“How probably?”

"There MAYBE be a night at the club." He leaned back, bottle in hand.

"Dicks." You gave a dramatic sigh, dropping your now empty food container into the bag with his. You made a show of scrunching down the top of the bag, dropping it to the floor by the side of the sofa, ready to be taken to the trash, before you leaned back, shaking your head.

"What?" he turned to you, beer paused halfway to his mouth.

"Oh, no, I was just saying, at my hen do there will be dicks. Lots of dicks."

“What the fuck?” He spluttered and you shrugged, not looking at him, feigning concentration on the television.

“I can't have strippers too? Tut, tut Disco, that's very old fashioned."

There was a pause, and you waited for his reaction, knowing it could go one of two ways. Out and out petulant protesting, or some sort of childish, half witty come back.

"You know, my dick is by far the most important." He chose the latter.

"You mean you are the most important dick?"

“Yeah.” He conceded. “Hey, least I’m important in some way.”

At that you laughed and moved a little closer to him. He shifted, allowing you to snuggle under his arm, pressing a kiss to your head.

“You know what else is important?” You asked, your hand gently tracing shapes on his white tee.

“What?”

“That you don’t forget that you owe me a favor, Detective Diskant." “That I do.” He agreed, and you felt him nod.

“So, there’s a pile of ironing that needs doing and the bed sheets need changing tomorrow. Can you manage?”

At that he let out a loud guffaw, his chest rumbling against your cheek. "Seriously, Baby?" He glanced down at you as you tipped your head up to look at him. "Absolutely," you winked

“I am at your complete mercy to satisfy you in any way you want... and you ask me to do chores?” He rolled his eyes. “You’re losing your sense of adventure, Sweetheart.” "Oh I have a sense of adventure, but a bet is a bet and we've pulled three doubles between the two of us so shits gotta get done, and you lost, therefore, you... are... my... bitch.” Your words were punctuated by soft jabs to his chest with your index finger and Paul groaned, throwing his head back against the sofa as he scrunched his eyes closed.

“Fuck my life.”

“I’m sorry, what was that?” You looked at him and he opened his eyes. “Fuck my wife?”

“We’re not married yet.” He smirked, arching an eyebrow at you as he played back your words from earlier.

“Details,” you played along and he laughed as you shifted a little more so your face was level with his. “Now shut up and kiss me.”

With a cheeky grin he leaned over, pressing his lips to yours, his hand sliding to the back of your neck as the kiss grew deeper, his tongue slowly sliding against yours. You let out a soft moan, shifting a little, your hand cupping his face and then he pulled back. You pouted at the loss of contact and opened your eyes to shoot him a glare, to find him smirking a little.

"Double or nothing, I bet I can make you cum in less than two minutes.”

“Two minutes?” You arched a brow, biting your lip a little as you squirmed at the frankly filthy look in his eyes. “Now?”

“Yup.”

“Bring it on.” You threw down the gauntlet. “But that doesn’t include the time it takes me to get you naked.” He grinned, shifting a little so he was side on, facing you.

“Fine.” You rolled your eyes. ��Or the foreplay.”

“Jesus Christ, Paul, just get on with it. You said two minutes. Clock starts the second you start, your challenge not mine. He grabbed your beer bottle and placed it along with his on the table with a bang. “You saying you don’t want me to love on you a little bit before I bang you into next week?” His voice was low as he hovered over you a little, his face inches from yours. "I'm saying I'm fucking desperate, that's what I'm saying."

"Then I won't need two minutes.” He grinned, pressing further into you, causing you to lay back on the sofa.

“God, you’re so full of it.” You narrowed your eyes.

“You’re gonna be full of it soon.” He smirked, his lips pressing to yours. "Stop... Talking... And... Do... It," you demanded between his dizzying, little pecks. His lips curled into a smile against yours as his hands gently trailed up the outside of your smooth thighs, thumbs grazing under the hem of your cut offs. The assault from his lips already soaking you.

It wouldn't take much, you both were fully aware of it. Nearly a week apart or just missing each other had you two desperately seeking release. The question was, who would cave first. He said two minutes and you knew he could hold off until you were good and worked over. His fingers slipped between your denim shorts and he gave a low groan as he felt your damp panties. His kiss grew hungrier and he was quickly on your flies, your shorts were down your leg in a matter of seconds, tossed over the back of the sofa, panties with them.

He moved to a kneel, one hand gently hooking your right leg up to rest against the back of the couch, knocking the other to the side, your foot falling automatically to the floor, toes pressing onto the soft carpet, leg bent at the knee. You don't even register how fast he moved downwards, and part of you wondered if he lost on purpose. A flat long swipe tasted at your folds.

"Jesus," it felt glorious and your back arched off the sofa in delight. There was a wee bit of scruff causing a tease of friction against your inner thighs and although you weren't timing him, you knew it couldn't have been more than sixty seconds when his tongue dipped into your hole causing you to cry out.

"Fuck, Paul..."

He gave a little chuckle, mouth vibrating against your nub which he grazed with his teeth. You bit your lip as your insides began to tremble, you were so desperately trying to hold off just to get that last win over him, but it was useless. That rumble had you in the throes of it and you were gone, your legs shaking as you came, your walls clamping around nothing as you gasped, your body shuddering with pleasure.

The smirk and glisten that was evident on his lips as he sat up and caged you in, had you clawing at his shorts. "I win."

"Yeah, okay, you smug little shit,” your voice was breathy as you recovered from your high, your hands pulling at the drawstring in the middle of his abs. “Dare I ask how you want me?”

His baby blues, already dark with desire, flashed and he pressed his lips to yours, his mouth dominating and you could taste yourself on him. You groaned as his hands slid up, cupping your face and he pulled back.

“Hands on the floor, feet on the coffee table, knees bent.”

You blinked, “what?”

“Hands on the floor, feet on the coffee table, knees bent.” He repeated.

Okay, so this was new…

With a final, suspicious look at him as he moved back, you stood, jumping and emitting a little squeak as he slapped your ass as you went. Taking a deep breath you turned, placed your hands on the floor and rested the tops of your feet on the coffee table, your knees bent.

“So you can do as you’re told.” Paul smirked, standing up off the sofa.

“When I want to.” You peeked up at him as best you could to see him sliding his shorts down his legs, stepping out of them before he moved round and threw his leg over your shins. His hands slid up the outside of your thighs, coming to rest on your waist as he pulled you back a little, his erection pressing into your behind as he ground against you, giving a little hiss.

“Fuck, baby you look so good from back here.” He moaned, bending over slightly to press a kiss to your spin and you shivered, your arms wobbling a little and you began to worry just how much of this you could take.

“Paul, seriously, just…”

“Patience.” He cut you off as he gave your ass a soft slap making you emit a noise that was half way between a squeal and a laugh as he positioned himself behind you, and you immediately missed the warmth of his chest where it had been pressed to your back moments ago.

You felt the tip of his dick as it poked at your entrance, and he had no problem slipping inside your already soaked folds. But the angle and the pressure of your body closed off as he slipped inside you set your nerves on fire. You both moaned out together as he slid home, his balls to your clit.

You felt how thick he was against your walls. A little twitch and flutter from his shaft as you both remained still, you silently begging and waiting for him to move. His fingertips gently dug into your hips as he slowly pulled back and moved forward again.

"Fuck, baby, so fucking tight, like this," Paul ground out as he pumped slowly in and out of you. He was taking his time, slow thrusts and long pulls back. In truth, it was agony, but a beautiful torture. And a torture that he continued again, and again, and again. Over and over, in no rush whatsoever, a sharp contrast to where he’d brought you off before on the couch as fast as he could.

Your arms were shaking from baring the position but you wanted more. And as the bubbles of pleasure slowly simmered through your core and deep into your belly, you moaned out your demand. "Harder."

"Oh, fuck," Paul quivered inside you but picked up his pace, his hips slamming into yours, your insides squeezing him tightly as his hands gripped at your hips, blunt nails biting against your skin. With every thrust forward you were jolted, your palms sliding on the rough surface of the rug underneath you, and you curled your fingertips into the deep, cream coloured shag in an attempt to prevent yourself from face planting straight onto the floor.

"Yeah, just like that," you panted, your elbows locking as you pushed yourself up slightly, "oh fuck, Paul!" You could tell by his breathing and how he felt inside you that he was ready to cum but he could always hold off until you had yours. "So close," you managed to pant out, letting him know you weren’t far.

He slowed his pace, bending his body down your spine again, and pressed his lips to the back of your neck, "just," he thrusted, "let", again, "go".

His words flipped the switch inside your body and you felt yourself going, the blood already rushing to your head from the position you were in, and the pressure was pounding in your ears as you came, hard. "Oh my God!" You cried out as your walls clamped down around him, milking his hot seed to explode inside you.

"That’s my girl, fuck!" He roared at the feel of you around him, and his hips grew sloppy as he came, grunting, pulling you back onto him as he let go of his thick payload.

With your chests heaving, bodies stilled, his fingers still around your hips, his thumbs drew lazy circles on your back. You felt his blue gaze on you and you couldn't see it, but you knew he was smirking.

“Paul.” You managed to swallow, “baby, my arms.”

“Oh, shit, yeah.” He moved gently to pull out of you, curling his arm around your waist in the nick of time as your elbows gave way and the pair of you tumbled rather ungracefully to the rug by the table in a tangle of limbs, your giggles ringing around the room, drowning out the sound of the television.

“You okay?” He asked gently, as you moved so you were lay on your back looking up at him as he lay on his side, propped on his left elbow. He tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear with his right hand as you nodded, leaning up to kiss him deeply.

“I’m not even gonna ask where you saw or read about that.” You chuckled and he grinned, glancing around the room cheekily before he looked down at you.

“Boys talk, sweetheart.” He shrugged. “But admit it, that was better than making me fold sheets.”

You chuckled as he pressed his lips to yours again, your fingers gently twisting his silver chain between them as you looked at him and arched your eyebrow. “If I admit it will you do it again? Only not tonight, don’t think my arms could take another round.”

Paul let out a laugh which rumbled in his chest and he pressed his lips to yours again. “Maybe we can make a game out of it, see how many other surfaces I can use to I prop your feet on and fuck you from behind.”

You scoffed, slapping at his arm as he grinned down at you cheekily, and you bit your lip.

“I can run with that.” Your hands moved so they slipped round his back, gently tracing shapes over the muscles, making them twitch a little and he sighed as your nails reached that spot on his neck that always turned him to putty in your hands.

“Stop, you know what that does to me.” He looked down at you.

“I do.” You agreed, continuing nonetheless.

“Seriously, you want more?”

“Well, like you said.” Your fingers curled round the nape of his neck, pulling his face down so it was inches from yours. “It’s been a while since we got time together, best make the most of it.”

“Oooh, you’re a bad, bad woman future Mrs Disco…” he smirked, kissing you deeply. “And I’m so down for that.”

****

It was late in the evening, the two of you having carried your sex-capades from the lounge to the bedroom, both of you spent and spooning in the aftermath of bliss when Paul's cell rang out.

He grumbled and shifted slightly, turning to grab the offending item form the night stand before he answered, "Diskant."

You strained your ears to listen to who was on the other end but it wasn't audible.

"Yeah, okay, got it. I'll call you back," he replied and hung up. Then he quickly made an outgoing call. "Hey, so I just talked to Scribble. Freemont and Coates, or whoever they are, want to meet us." There was a brief pause, "tonight." Another pause and he closed his phone.

He sighed, turning to you, "I got to go."

"Okay," you sat up, an uneasiness filling your veins.

"I'll be back," he slipped out of bed, dressing quickly in black jeans, a black button down and hat. He clipped his badge from the nightstand to his belt after slipping into his uniform boots. Then leaned over and gave you a long, deep kiss. "I love you."

"I love you. Come home to me," you kissed him and pulled back, your fingers pressing the medallion of safe keeping against his chest. Paul touched his forehead to yours before he pressed his lips to your own in a soft kiss and headed out. You heard the door click as he left your apartment, and you gave a sigh, settling down into the bed, pulling his pillow to your naked chest as you closed your eyes. Whilst you knew that this was the job, hell, you’d done it yourself for long enough, it still never made it easier and for some inexplicable reason, tonight it made you even more twitchy than normal. But, that was more than likely down to the fact you’d managed to enjoy some quality time together tonight, and it had been so good.

Before long you drifted off to sleep, and you had no idea what time it was when the cordless rang, shrilling through the apartment, raising you from your slumber, but as you blinked yourself awake, it was still pitch black outside.

"Hello," you croaked.

"Y/N," you recognized the voice immediately, given your own happenings with IA.

"Captain Biggs," you replied, suddenly fully awake as you sat up in bed, the covers clutched to your chest.

"It's Paul,” his voice was low and serious and instantly you felt a cold, icy dread floor your system from your head to your toes as he passed, taking a breath, “a unit is on its way for you."

***** Part 2

#rock n roll people in a disco world #paul diskant #uglywombatsexpositionchallenge #paul diskant x reader #paul diskant x you #street kings #street kings fan fic #reader insert #chris evans #chris evans characters

329 notes · View notes

thelowlysatsuma · 4 years

Text

alright dipsticks, hear me out

taz balance au where everything is the same except that lucretia and barry have each others’ farspeech frequencies

it all starts about a year after lucretia voidfishes the plane. she’s poking around goldcliff, hoping to find some way to con some rich shit into paying for her gigantic moon base, when she runs — literally runs headfirst — into some bespectacled nerd in denim

barry, for his part, doesn’t know why this complete stranger is offering to buy him lunch as an apology for spilling his Fantasy Starbucks all over his oldass shirt, but he sure as shit isn’t complaining. especially when something, something about this kid feels so... familiar

in a spur of the moment decision, lucretia gives him her farspeech number. barry doesn’t think anything of it at the time

...anything, that is, until he’s rising, spectral and flickering, over his battered corpse, and he begins laughing hysterically, tears glimmering in long-gone eye sockets. he may not have lup back, but he’s got his little sister.

so they start texting. is barry furious at lucretia for what she’s done? sure, a bit. but he understands her logic, and his temper is soothed when she point-blank tells him that she’s going to help him find lup. they may be working against each other as far as the relics are concerned, but if lucretia can locate at least one more shred of her former family, then by god is she going to. barry understands, he thinks, and so they help keep each other a little less lonely over a long ten years

lucretia keeps barry updated on how the other birds are doing, as best she can. they rejoice together as magnus and julia take back raven’s roost, and when glamour springs is shadowed by a mass poisoning barry has to do everything up to physically restraining lucretia from beating the ass of whichever motherfucker did that to taako. wait, he tells her. physical pain is temporary. a lich, on the other hand, is in a prime position to make some douche’s life a living hell. lucretia grins and offers to fund his plots in any way she can.

barry, for his part, keeps lucretia up-to-date on the search for lup. they have matching little cork boards in their respective offices, each filled with maps and theories and half-baked what-ifs. they aren’t any closer to finding out what happened to her, but they will. they have to.

speaking of things happening, barry is the first one to find lucretia after wonderland. he hadn’t been able to reach her for a month, and so when he feels the enormous surge of pure magical despair explode outwards from the felicity wilds, he transports himself there as quickly as he can. he finds his baby sister at the centre of a mile-wide crater, twenty years older and countless sacrifices poorer, and he holds her as gently as he can without physical hands, and makes her promise to never deal with wonderland again. fuck, he’ll get the animus bell for her, he doesn’t care. he just can’t see lucretia in that state ever again. (never again, that’s what they told themselves, in a group huddle late one night the dawn of cycle 66. he’d failed her once. he couldn’t do it again.)

as she builds up the bureau, lucretia starts getting questions about her best friend on the stone. lucas asks her point blank who it is one day early in their acquaintance, and she answers “b- uh, b-j” “that tells me basically nothing. what does that even stand for?” lucas demands. “uh,” lucretia says, “🅱️amazing jrace”

thus begins a fine tradition of bureau employees trying to get any info they can on the mysterious “bj”, including his actual name. so far some of the top answers they’ve gotten from madame director include “bitchin jackass” “burger joint” “beetlejuice” and “banjo jimboree”. once, robbie asks her if he’s her secret lover, and lucretia has to summon a bucket before retching in disgust, which puts paid to that particular theory fairly succinctly

barry, for his part, adores these rumours. he keeps asking if lucretia will lift the lich barrier, just for a day, so he can come and stir up even more shit. lucretia, while admittedly very tempted, denies.

when he finds out that lucretia has been telling bureau employees that the red robes are evil, barry is understandably insulted. the next group of regulators that touch the ground are covered in fantasy cheez whiz for the duration of their mission.

lucretia gets him back by replacing all the denim in the jeans at his base with silly string. barry moves bases, and the prank war escalates

(no one has the courage to tell madame director that her hair has been turned rainbow at the last candlenights party. privately, lucretia thinks she looks bitchin)

every now and again, lucretia will text barry in a panic. these texts tend to look like this:

“barry.” “barold aid me” “barry I fucked shit up real good this time” “barry” “barry” “barry I was at the fantasy Olive Garden and the waiter said ‘enjoy your meal’ and I said ‘you too’ barry kill me n o w “

barry can and will mock lucretia mercilessly for this. he also insists for weekly video updates on fisher and junior.

he also has biweekly fantasy skype sessions with davenport

booyah: I saw a woman so beautiful I started crying???

bear-old: oh mood

booyah: and then I hired her and her son (who’s a little bitch) to work on my secret moon base and I think I’ve made a terrible mistake???????

bear-old: oh my fucking god this is why I don’t trust you to stop the apocalypse

when the thb start working as reclaimers, barry demands weekly updates on them, as well. it goes about as well as you’d expect

booyah: magnus ate the philosopher’s stone

bear-old: he fucking w h a t ?

booyah: he used the glutton’s fork, and he ATE the philosopher’s stone. taako and merle used stone skin and stone shape to get the damn thing out. happy fucking candlenights.

when barry finds out that taako’s DATING the fool who’s been chasing after him wile e coyote style for over a decade, he loses his s h i t. he and lucretia have a girls’ night where they bitch about taako and eat shitty chocolate to cope

bear-old: you HIRED a BABY???

booyah: he’s ten! that’s plenty old. and he’s certainly competent, seeing as he found my organization when even you couldn’t.

bear-old: creesh please. please do not Irreparably Fuck Up A Small Child

booyah: hey, at least I’m not the one who threw him off a moving train!

bear-old: I never threw anyone off a

bear-old: lucretia

bear-old: who

bear-old: who in your employ threw ANGUS MCDONALD, a LITERAL CHILD, off of a MOVING. VEHICLE?

booyah:

booyah: taako

bear-old: fucking fantasy CHRIST

(they have quite a few girls’ nights eating shitty chocolate and razzing on taako, actually)

team sweet flips goes to the director’s office one day to give a status report and find her red-eyed and coughing. she says she has allergies. the cute cat video barry just texted her on her stone, however, begs to differ

lucretia preps the boys for refuge, yes, but her mind is filled with texts and tomes and the letters “l u p” carved into a bureau wall. she passes countless sleepless nights with barry on the line, trying to decipher what it all means

but they emerge from the woven gulch unscathed, and that can only mean one thing: wonderland

she doesn’t tell barry where she’s sending them. she can’t let him interfere out of some misguided attempt to save her from the place. her texts grow few and far between

she doesn’t have to tell barry. he knows

the day they get sent out, as lucretia breaks down in her office, surrounded by a dizzying vastness that could envelop her very being if she would just let it, her stone buzzes.

four words: I’ll keep them safe

and then?

well, then it’s the end of the world

(but when lup emerges from her decade-long cage, phantasmal and resplendent, lucretia and barry share a look)

(and when the hunger is consuming the only home she knows and she’s flying out in one last attempt to face is, barry is on her stone)

(and when the dust settles and they’re finally, finally free, when the world hears a story and a song and former and current bureau employees alike learn just how important the mysterious “bj” really is, when lucretia looks at the wreckage of her life’s work and home and family — when all that happens, barry is the one to beckon to her with open arms.)

(they’ve been beside the other for a hundred and ten years, after all. that’s not gonna fucking change now.)

anyways yeah folks barry and lucretia texting au play with me in this space

@littlemisscritical @thatcoldfeeling and you know what? @herbgerblin what the hell

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ace-sanz · 2 years

Text

Merry Christmas everyone!🎁🎄☃️

I got you a lottle story.

Geno and Reaper were busy getting their home decorated for Christmas. "Reaper, did you send out the invites?" Geno asked as he continued to set up the tree. "Sent them out yesterday." Death replied, hanging the garland along the living room archway. "Thank you. Let's hope they show." Reaper headed over and gave Geno a gentle hug, "Don't worry, we'll have a great Christmas either way. Also, if they do show, I'll be collecting weapons at the door." Geno sighs, "you're right. Let's finish with the declarations." They part from the hug and Reaper helps Geno with the tree.

Error made his way to Nightmare’s mansion. As he walked along the path in the seemingly uninhabited but beautiful AU, he could see Cross and Killer chasing each other with their knives. The destroyer shakes his head with a smirk as he reaches the front door and enters. "Hey, Night?!" Error called as he looked for his love. "Nighty?" Error eventually headed up to Nightmare's office. He knocked softly on the closed door. "Come in." Error heard the call from the inside and opened the door. "Hey, got a note for all of us."

Nightmare sighed with a smile and took the envelope from Error. He opened it and his smile faltered. "Nighty?" Error asked moving around the desk to see the note. Confusion covered the glitch's face, "what's Christmas?"

Night looked up at his Glitchy, "it's a holiday about spending time with family and friends being happy." Error could hear the venom in Night's tone as he said the last word. "It says it’s at my brother's place, I would like to see him but if you don't want to go we won't." Night pulled Error onto his lap, "I won't keep you from seeing your brother. I just don't want to see mine. The invitation says that the stars are invited to. I can't be held responsible if something happens." Error snuggled into Nightmare's warmth, "Then we'll send the others and stay here." Night shook his head, "We'll all go. I wanna meet your brother." Error nodded with a yawn, "nap first."

"Dream!" Ink burst through the door of his and Dream's home in Haventale, he had gone to get Blue and Razz to come visit. "Look what was in our multiverse mailbox." Ink gives the invite to Dream to read. "Oh, fun! We got invited to Reaper and Geno's for Christmas. Blue you and Razz are added in the invitation too." Dream beams with happiness that he gets to spend the holiday with his friends and love. "WOWIE!!! I CAN'T WAIT!!" Blue is practically bouncing on the spot. Razz put a hand on Blue’s shoulder with a chuckle, "Calm down, Baby Blue. I know you're excited and it makes me happy but remember to save the excitement for the party. What time is it at?" Dream an Ink look over the invite. "It's later today, around suppertime." "Just enough time to get gifts to thank Geno and Reaper. Let's go to the multiverse marketplace." They all nod as Ink gets broomie to make a portal.

Once the four exited the portal to the mall, Ink and Razz headed one way as Blue and Dream headed in the other. Both pairs of friends were looking for gifts for the other pair.

Added bonus gift.

I'll update this each year.

#undertale #undertalechristmas #Christmas #Errormare #Drink #bloodydust #Croller

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moth-based-cryptology · 3 years

Note

HELLO BESTIE I am currently having Ralbert Brainrot and you're the best person go come to for this, obviously,, so PLEASE share! I would like to hear about ufc albert or youtuber race, or dancing partners!! I love them smm

HI YES HELLO USING THIS AS AN EXCUSE TO WRITE UFC FIGHTER AL PART 2 THANKS BABES

i just witnessed a literal crime and i’m Feeling The Rage (boxing judges at mma events can catch these hands) so here is. my brain on anger.

also the first half of this is pretty fight-talk heavy but the second half is more al/ralbert central so message me/send me an ask if i don’t explain something well enough <3

here is the ask i sent to @we-are-inevitable (thanks jac i’m in love with you mwah) and here is part 1 for this au if you haven’t read that one yet !!

also,,,,, this is fairly obvious. but trigger warning for violence/physical fighting, as well as blood. (it’s a rough gig y’all fjdhdb) oh and swearing but that’s pretty much just me LMAO

here i am, bein mad and writing ralbert. therapy time with chandler ig

OK SO

this is after his debut. duh. continuation

i think he’s probably 5 fights in with 5 wins. he’s been running people through, especially with four full camps after a short notice start, and he’s never even seen a decision in the ufc

let’s just say the hype train is moving FAST and it’s moving LOUD

everyone has to have those people that watch their fights just to see them lose, on top of the majority male fan base that have to have a little bit of toxic masculinity and homophobia in there

so there’s A LOT of people that are waiting for him and his hype train to get derailed. but there’s also a fair amount of fans, so you win some you lose some (the way i would die to see this be a real fighter pls)

now albert’s not always the most confident guy, and he’s never been cocky, but none of this shit gets to him. he’s got his coaches, he’s got his friends and he’s got race behind him. he knows he’s got the skills, and he’s got his support system, so who gives a shit what a bunch of cowards on the internet have to say?

and then they put him against someone known for his grappling and stamina. and the “it’s a wrap for dasilva!” bandwagon starts. it happens every time a rising striker and early knockout artist fights a well known grappler with any semblance of later round power (even if al has a background in wrestling and has gone 5 rounds and won outside of the ufc. it’s a bandwagon for a reason)

and it’s not Upsetting, it’s not really getting into his head in any way that’ll make him do worse, but it’s kinda pissing him off. which is bad for his opponent

the last person on earth you want to be fighting is an annoyed albert dasilva who thinks he has something to prove

he works his ass off in camp, and the press tour is a self-assured albert vs. a loudmouth who thinks he’s hot shit cause a few people on twitter think he’ll sweep

and, to be completely honest? it’s starting to look that way 2 rounds in.

it’s a 5 round fight, co-main event on a big card, and so far all al’s opponent has done is pinned him to the cage and kept him there. a few strikes worth anything - at least enough make al’s cheek bleed, no takedowns, which would at least give him some activity, and so submission attempts, so he can’t even gain any ground that way. he’s just- Stuck. and if THIS is how he loses, he’s gonna be pissed

the bell for the second round sounds, and you can actually see al’s chest heaving on camera as he walks to his corner - not because he’s tired or out of breath, but because he’s MAD, and fuck if he’s not going to do something about it

not only that, but he can not only see race and jack standing up by the cage - plus race’s expression, which is slightly annoyed and super anxious, which hurts his chest to think about - but he can hear them too

jack is yelling profanities, as per usual. he doesn’t that regardless of how the fight is going, but it’s less encouraging when you’re the one losing.

race though,,,, race isn’t really yelling, he’s more talking to himself than anything, but he’s close enough to cage and al knows him well enough to figure out what he’s saying. and if the muttered almost-prayers while he paces back and forth weren’t enough, the shiny gold engagement ring on race’s hand definitely is

round 3,,,, let’s just say it goes a little differently than the first 2 had gone.

he opens with a spinning back kick, of all fucking things, and that truly sets the pace

he’s the taller guy by a few inches, like usual, which makes his arms longer. the only reason crushing his against the cage worked is cause the guy he’s fighting cuts weight like a wrestler, so he’s easily got 20 pounds on albert come fight night

but once he finds his rhythm and starts throwing, he starts connecting too. he manages to stay out of range of his opponent and stay his comfortable distance to start t-ing off

this isn’t a one punch power ending. this isn’t a beautiful head kick, or a giant knee, or even just a clean right hook.

this is albert, who’s arms are starting to feel the 3rd round a little bit, hitting this guy with everything he has cause he refuses to lose this fight.

i mean- everyone watched him get up at the start of the round with a set jaw and a scary determined glint in his eye. he’s not a person you fuck with, and he’s definitely not a person you publicly ridicule before being locked in a cage to fight with

the guy he’s fighting is absolutely battered, but he manages to survive until round 4. the first of the championship rounds, something al’s never seen in a ufc fight before, and it feels like the arena is holding its breath

so when al comes out and does the same thing as round 3 to better results - fight ending results - everyone’s a little shocked, honestly

the commentary team’s in disbelief, cause albert is NOT a slow starter, regardless of what this fight would tell you, and the fact he managed a win at all, let alone such a phenomenal one, is fucking astounding

he gets his hand raised, obviously, but the really interesting part is the post fight interview

“albert, man, what changed between round 2 and 3? what second gear did you find?”

“bro, i just— it was pissing me off, honestly. i don’t come in here to get pinned down for 25 minutes. and, y’know, my team gave me good advice. i had all the pieces, straight from the jump, someone just had to force me to put them in place…”

and then he looks over at race, who gives al one of those half grin, half smirks and winks at him, and al just chuckles to himself and finishes answering the question

“the thing that really forced my hand is race. i won’t get cheesy on you, but watching someone who loves and supports you through everything panic cause he’s scared for you - it’s a big motivator. everyone would figure out a lot more of my motivations if they went and watched race’s expressions back instead of whatever the hell i’m doing in here. he’s always been the brains, i’m just the brawn.”

and that’s a better answer than anyone was expecting, plus he’s just had the fight of a lifetime that’s probably earned him a title shot, so he’s done soon after that and gets to have his little in-cage celebration

he hugs his team and jack, who razzes him a little bit as per usual, and makes some dumb quip about going over tapes later like he’s a coach. and then comes race

he hugs him, all tender and cute and also very sweaty cause That’s How It Works, and the camera’s focused on him, so they can tell they’re whispering back and forth. but there’s no mics on them, so what’s said is missed entirely on the audience, but it’s their usual cheesy, in love mess

“congrats, baby. i’m proud of you.”

“oh please. it was 90% you anyway. i meant what i said, it wasn’t just for the cameras.”

“i know that. i’m gonna have to get you back somehow for telling everyone to go back and watch my awful anxious expression. i’ll think of something.”

“i’m sure you will, sweetheart.”

and then al does that awful, adorable lil nose bump thing, and then kisses race. and then jack covers his eyes and whines until they stop like the actual 12 year old boy he is inside

and then they leave the octagon, race and al holding hands, and al throws his arm over jack’s shoulder and shoves his head down and pushes him, cause even though he was just in a literal cage match he’s still a roughhousing teenager at heart

and he’s got interviews and press shit that separates him from his people, and he’s gotta slide that bulletproof mask back down over all the happy and in love shit he’s feeling so he can not smile like an idiot on camera constantly

but every once in awhile he’ll catch jack giving him the finger and laugh before returning it below view of the camera

or he’ll catch race’s eye from where he’s standing behind all the studio lights and do a little wave under the camera and return the wink from earlier, and the unbothered fighter facade will crack a little bit

but he’s not completely convinced that’s such a bad thing

GOD THIS POST IS SO MUCH LONGER THEN I MEANT IT TO BE IM SORRY

but Yeah. Them.

i love this au a helleva lot more than i should but that’s Fine cause i’ve got thoughts for days on it

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hockeylvr59 · 4 years

Text

Secret Love Part 7 || Cale Makar

Requested: [ ] yes [x] no

Authors Note: Sweet man got an apple yesterday and I’m hoping he hits the scoresheet again today. Also I am still DEAD from the photos the avs dropped on us the other day and they are majorly feeding some thoughts... Hopefully, I redeem myself from the cliffhanger with this part. I managed to finish part 8 last night so I plan on starting on part 9 as soon as I actually get some of the things on my to do list done with school starting again this week. (Updates may get slower so just forewarning you about that.) But uh...enjoy and let me know what you think.

Warnings: smut, cursing.

Word Count: 3,566

~~~~~

You hadn’t even made it two steps before Cale’s hand caught your wrist, gently pulling you back to him. For a moment his expression seemed panicked, but then it softened considerably, a smile breaking onto his face as flickers of awe appeared in his eyes. You watched as he opened his mouth to speak twice, quickly shutting it each time before he finally hummed in content.

“Is it my baby?” He questioned. “The one you imagine sleeping in there? Are they my kids running around the basement, skating in the backyard?” Though you hesitated, unsure of what answer he wanted to hear, your face must have given you away because Cale’s smile grew, his cheeks flushing. “You bought this house because you can see our life together here? You couldn’t wait to show me, could you? Hoping that I’d love it as much as you do?” Ducking his head, Cale pressed his lips to yours, easing them together gently.

“You’re incredible.” He spoke, his breath fanning against your lips. “Would you relax?” He requested. “I’m not going anywhere.” His voice was so self-assured that you couldn’t help but take comfort in it. Kissing you again, Cale moved you over to your living room couch where he sat, pulling you halfway onto his lap.

“Should we talk about this?” He suggested. “We didn’t want to define this before but I think maybe we should now.” He continued. You’d failed to define things on purpose, not wanting to pressure Cale into anything considering the toxic relationship he’d gotten out of just before your feelings had been revealed. But it had been a few months and if Cale was ready for that step then you needed to hear him out.

“What do you want?” You whispered, rubbing over your arm as a chill coursed through your body.

“I want you.” Cale declared. “I want to get to know who you are as more than just my friend. I want to continue to explore this chemistry we have.” Gently his fingers brushed over your thigh, making you shiver for another reason entirely. “I care about you Y/N...and I think I could feel even stronger if given the chance.”

“So...this is…?” You prompted not wanting to assume anything. Shaking his head, Cale smiled before inching his fingers higher on your thigh.

“Us dating, an exclusive and serious relationship, you being my girlfriend...take your pick.” Cale grinned.

“All of the above.” You breathed, almost amazed at how relaxed and sure he seemed about this. It shouldn’t have surprised you but for some reason it did.

“I like the sound of that.” Cale mused. “But uh...can we keep this between us just for a little while. You know mom will go crazy and…”

“You want to be sure there’s something for her to go crazy over.” You finished.

“That wasn’t what I was going to say,” Cale said, shaking his head. “That’s already true and I don’t see it changing.” Your heart jumped at his words because indirectly he was saying that this was something he was in for the long haul. Again, you probably could have gathered that from his awed reaction to the two of you having kids together someday, but for some reason, this phrasing was what really hit you hard. “I was going to say that I just want to enjoy this just the two of us for a while before I get looks every time I tell her I’m coming over here.”

So he wanted to be selfish for a little while, you were totally okay with that. To be honest, you weren’t really looking forward to sharing this with the world just yet either. Still, you had to tease him just a little.

“You just want the thrill of sneaking around like we’re teenagers again…” You razzed him. Though his cheeks flushed, he didn’t deny it, just shrugging his shoulders in response.

“Problem?” He asked, his fingers settling at the base of your skull to pull you closer.

“Nope.” You admitted, closing the distance between the two of you to kiss him again. The feeling of his mouth on yours was becoming addictive, but you didn’t want it any other way.

By the time you finally pulled away to breathe, you felt calm. Now that the air was clear it seemed like some of the urgency that had lingered in you since his arrival disappeared. It wasn’t that you didn’t still feel needy for his touch, because you did, rather, now you felt secure in the fact that he was yours and so just being held by him was enough.

“So uh your dad set my tv up for me. I don’t have internet yet but we could watch a movie or tv show on DVD if you want?” You whispered. When Cale nodded, you shifted to let him off the couch before pointing at the box you were certain contained all of your movies. You couldn’t help but admire Cale from behind as he dug through the box, finally making a selection. As you turned the tv on, you watched him pop it in the DVD player before turning to return to you. Suddenly he changed direction, moving over to his bags, and you perched yourself up on the couch, curious as to what had caused the path change. His hand was behind his back when he appeared in front of you again and he wore a sheepish smile.

“I uh...I brought you something…I forgot about it until just now.” He explained, moving his hand to pass you the object. It was a photo frame and when you turned it over you gasped. Inside was a picture of the two of you from the night at the bar with the Avs. Cale was talking to someone, eyes bright and that lazy drunk grin on his face. You, on the other hand, were just resting against his shoulder like there was no place you’d rather be than tucked into his side. It was a cute picture and you immediately moved to place it on the fireplace mantle. “Lauren sent it to me and I thought it might make you smile.” Cale murmured.

“It’s perfect.” You assured him, slipping your arms around his waist as you leaned in for a soft kiss. “Now what movie did you pick?” You inquired, the two of you settling back down to cuddle on the couch. A glance at the screen revealed the title screen for The Princess Bride and you giggled totally satisfied with his choice.

Cuddling on the couch with your head on Cale’s chest was your new favorite way to spend an evening. You quoted parts of the movie to each other, Cale making you giggle each time. At one point he murmured against your head and when you couldn’t make out the words you pulled back just enough to look at him.

“What was that?” You inquired. Cale looked at you like he didn’t expect to be caught and he shook his head as if to say it was nothing. For a moment you were prepared to let it go, but after how much Cale had prodded you to be open with him all evening, you felt you deserved the same. “Talk to me, Cale.” You nudged gently. His cheeks started turning pink again and you brushed your thumb over one of them, trying to reassure him.

“I said I hope our kids get your giggle.” He eventually caved and admitted.

“Oh.” You breathed, that not being what you expected at all. Cale opened his mouth again and you shook your head. “You don’t have to explain yourself Cale, you’re allowed to think those things. But if you want to talk about it, I’m all ears. I mean...I know you’re probably not ready to be seriously thinking about having kids and that’s okay, I’m not going to rush you, I know we’re at different stages…” Not realizing you’d started to ramble, you were shocked to be cut off by Cale’s mouth against yours.

After kissing you, Cale leaned back against the couch and his eyes focused on the movie once more. You figured he wanted to drop the subject, so you complied, laying your head back down against him.

“I’ve uh...I’ve had a lot of time to process what happened with Sara…” Cale eventually whispered. “And god I was terrified when she told me she was pregnant. But I don’t think that fear was at the thought of having a baby...it was the fear of having a baby with her.” You didn’t know what to do with that statement and you hoped Cale had more that he wanted to say. “Like I suspected she was cheating. I knew our relationship wasn’t good anymore. Having a baby in that situation would have just been a mess…”

Cale paused to laugh at the scene on the screen in front of you but after a moment you felt him press a kiss to the top of your head. “But uh...I don’t think I’d be so scared if the situation was right…” That seemed to be all that Cale had to say and you nodded against him, his words lingering in your head. You had no idea what he meant by the ‘situation being right’ but it certainly felt like he was implying that he was open to kids with you at some point in the semi-distant future.

Deciding that worrying about kids right now was just an exercise in insanity, you shifted your focus back to the movie and the man whose body you were snuggled into. This was new and good and you were going to enjoy it. You had Cale for the summer and you planned to make the most of that time with him. There were so many things left to discover about each other and so many experiences to share. It had been a long time since you were in a relationship and though this wasn’t anything like your previous relationships, you were going to take your time getting to know Cale in all of these new ways.

When the credits finally started rolling across the screen you glanced up again to find Cale’s eyes on you. You weren’t sure how long he’d been staring, but you poked his side as a contented smile settled onto your face.

“What are you thinking?” You teased, your eyebrows raised.

“That you’re beautiful.” He said softly. “And that I can’t wait to spend the summer with you.” His thumb brushed against your cheek as he brushed a stray strand of hair from your face. “But also that I just want to take you to bed.” He finished, desire flickering in his eyes.

“Lead the way.” You murmured, turning the tv off as Cale stood up.

When the two of you reached the bedroom, Cale sat on the edge of the bed pulling you between his muscular thighs. With his hands on your hips, you watched as he pressed his head into your stomach for a minute before pulling back.

“Can we take our time tonight?” He requested, his touch featherlight as his thumbs grazed your sides.

“Of course, handsome.” You agreed, your fingers shifting to tangle in his hair. He didn’t react right away but after a moment his fingers slipped under your tank, slowly inching the fabric up your body. His mouth followed his hands, pressing kisses to your stomach, your ribs, and up along your sternum. Your breath hitched as first your tank and then your bra hit the floor for the second time today.

“God I can’t get over how perfect you are.” Cale praised, a soft but wicked gleam present as he gazed at you. “And don’t tell me you’re not because you are.” Taking compliments had always been something you struggled with and Cale clearly knew it. The words of denial on your lips were quickly forgotten, however, when Cale lifted you, gently laying you back against the mattress.

The way he was exploring your body was reverent and as much as you needed more, you were basking under his attention. There wasn’t a divet or curve Cale left unexplored. He hadn’t even touched you anywhere good yet but already you were aching for him. When his mouth latched onto one of your breasts, his teeth lightly scraping against your nipple, you were certain he could make you cum doing only that. Your body arched into him, your hands scraping against his lower back under his shirt until he pulled back to shed the offending fabric from his torso.

“Look at you.” He mumbled, pressing himself against you, his lips seeking out yours again. “So beautiful. All mine.”

“Yessss…” The whine left your throat as you attempted to thread your fingers under the waistband of his shorts.

“Uh uh.” He immediately chastised, his hand quickly grasping both of yours, pinning them to the bed above your head. “Not yet.” He warned, his voice and the small act of domination making you shiver beneath him. His fingers showed off his dexterity as he undid the button on your shorts. “Keep them there.” He warned again, letting go of your wrists for just a moment while he worked your shorts and panties off of your body. Too absorbed in what he was going to do next, you left your hands where he’d placed them. As he hovered over you once more, his knee parting your thighs, you felt his mouth nip along your neck before he kissed you again.

“Good girl.” He praised, “Guess I should reward you for being so good for me.” He mused, mischief crossing his expression before settling in his eyes. You felt his hand slip down your side before grazing along your thigh. Finally, his thumb bumped against your clit and you couldn’t help but moan when your skin sparked under his touch. “You’re so wet…” Cale breathed, his voice softening.

“Cale…” You whimpered, your hips attempting to arch into his hand as much as you could while being held in place by his solid body. Leveraging you back down with his body, Cale slipped first one thick finger and then a second into your core. “Oh fuck.” You cursed as Cale curled his fingers just right, making your entire body hot. He continued to spread you apart, his actions slow and deliberate as the knot in your stomach started to tighten.

If he was this good with his fingers and that good with his dick, you could only imagine what having his mouth on you would feel like when you finally reached that point. “Holy shit Cale right…” A choked gasp interrupted your sentence as Cale’s fingers scissored inside of you. As he curled them against your inner walls again, you felt your body snap and you cried out as your orgasm crashed over you. As your body finally drifted back down to reality you realized Cale was sitting back on his knees, licking his fingers clean of your juices.

“You taste sweet.” Cale declared and for a moment all you could do was laugh. Cale eyed you, probably thinking you were crazy as you sat up to kiss him. Everything about this was surreal and in a way overwhelming. “Y/N?” Cale inquired, his forehead resting against yours.

“I’m good.” You assured him, your hands settling at his hips. “You just keep surprising me that’s all.”

“Mmm...is that right?” Cale breathed, his fingers trailing down your back.

“It is.” You grinned. “Believe it or not, I tried not to think about your sex life so all of this is new to me.” With his attention focused on your words, you were able to slide your fingers under the waistband of his shorts, your hands sliding down to cup the globes of his ass. “You’ve got a bit of a kinky side under the boy next door exterior.” You teased.

“You aren’t as innocent as you appear either,” Cale smirked, his hips rolling back into your hands.

“I never claimed to be.” You chirped, pushing at his shorts and boxer briefs wanting him free from the rest of his clothes. “Now are you going to fuck me?” You inquired, your neediness slipping back into your tone.

“Nope.” Cale’s response threw you, especially when he helped you slide his clothing off before leaning over to where he’d stashed the box of condoms earlier. “Lay back sunshine. Let me take care of you.” He guided you to lay back against the pillows, settling his body over you. As he rolled the condom into place, Cale lifted your leg to drape over his hip and then gently and slowly pressed into you. It had only been a few hours since he’d last been inside you, but you’d missed the feeling of fullness that settled in your bones when you were connected like this.

With arms pressed to either side of your head to hold him above you, Cale rolled his hips, creating just the slightest bit of friction. It was slow and felt beyond intimate and suddenly you understood everything. Cale wasn’t going to fuck you because this was so much more than that. This was the two of you connecting in the most intimate way; it was more than physical, it was emotional.

Lifting your other leg to wrap around his waist, you tilted your head to kiss along his jaw. The new position allowed him to roll his hips deeper inside of you and you melded your mouth to his, pouring everything you felt for him into it.

You weren’t sure how long the two of you had been like this, time seemed to be an illusion as your bodies worked slowly in tandem to bring each other pleasure. You could feel your orgasm slowly build, so steadily that you were certain you’d know when your orgasm was about to crest. Then Cale slid a hand under your back forcing your hips to arch and suddenly you were screaming his name as heat and pleasure and relief and love hit you one after the other in waves. Cale followed you into your orgasm, his moans serving as the greatest sound you’d ever heard.

Kissing his shoulder, you waited for him to come down from his orgasm, your legs still wrapped firmly around his hips. He moved to pull out but you shook your head.

“Just wait a minute please.” You requested. Cale complied, his nose brushing against your jaw as he buried his face into your neck. As much as you never wanted him to part from you, you knew he needed to and so after a moment you gingerly let your legs drop back to the mattress, whining at the feeling of your aching muscles. Your legs weren’t the only thing that ached as Cale pulled out of you, but somehow as he moved to dispose of the condom, you were able to move to use the bathroom, peeing and cleaning yourself up.

Moving back into your room you decided that you were too tired to search for clean clothes and you certainly weren’t going to sleep in your dirty ones. So you slipped into bed as you were, yawning softly. You wondered what was taking Cale so long but you heard water running so you figured he was washing his hands and cleaning up himself. Instead, he returned with a bottle of water and a bottle of pills. Shaking a set of pills from the latter, he offered them and the water out to you.

“So you’re not as sore in the morning.” He murmured. Grateful, you took them downing half of what was in the bottle as well because you definitely had not had enough to drink today. “Go ahead and finish it, I can refill it from the tap.” He insisted. Whispering your thanks you finished it off before laying back down. After refilling the bottle from the bathroom tap, Cale set it beside the bed and then crawled in beside you, his arms behind his head as if inviting you to snuggle against him.

Taking the invitation, you snuggled close, your head resting on his shoulder. As soon as you were settled, he dropped his arms draping one around you.

“I’m glad you flew in early.” You breathed. This was your first night in your new home and spending it with Cale just felt right. Like it was just the first of many in the years to come. “Today’s been...amazing.”

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.” Cale replied, his lips pressing against your forehead. It was easy to start falling asleep, but you hummed in acknowledgement when Cale spoke your name. “We need to get you a bigger bed.” He mumbled. “Doubles are not made for 6 feet tall guys.” Giggling into his shoulder you smiled contentedly. “We’ll move this bed to the guest room and I’ll buy you a bigger bed. You can call it your housewarming present.” He insisted. That wasn’t a battle you were going to fight with him, you’d do pretty much anything to make sure that he was comfortable here, so you kissed his shoulder.

“Alright Cale...now go to sleep.” You teased. Less than one day in, you already knew this was going to be the greatest summer ever.

#cale makar #cale makar imagine #colorado avalanche imagine #colorado avalanche #nhl imagine #nhl imagines #hockey imagines #hockey imagine #nhl smut #hockey smut #cale makar nws #nws #lemon

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i-am-hoo-iyam · 1 year

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@mega-punani Navy stared at red across the table at dinner one night. “What? Why are you staring at me? Is it the fly?” Red took a scoop of mashed potato’s in his spoon and flung it at the fly buzzing around his head. He missed by a mile and hit sans, who was faking asleep at the table and got startled and spilled his bottle of ketchup on razz, who took sans hat and yanked it down hard over his eyes. Bear fixed the issue by clapping the fly while it was midair and then went to wash the dead fly off his hands. Everyone settled back down to finish eating and razz went to go change his clothes.

“Sorry red I was only wondering how you got so many scars… but asking that would be rude so I didn’t wanna make you self conscious”. Red lit up. “Oh boy. You got it all wrong kid. I’m proud of each scar I got!” Cash chimed in. “Even that one where you got drunk and played the knife game and nearly took a finger off?” ( where you stab between your fingers faster and faster). “Shaddup. Anyways. Wanna hear how I got all of em?” “YEAH!”

Navy snd blue sat on the floor around reds bees and red sat on his bed showing off his scars. “And this scar is when I got stabbed on an old scar so I got a scar on a scar! It was a fine take of how a human insulted the wrong skeleton and got slapped in the face. Then he stabbed me and I took off his head! With my fists!” Navy jumped into blues lap and hugged him tight. “There was blood everywhere! I still remember the feeling of brains in my” “STOP IT your scaring navy and that’s the grossest thing I think I ever heard.” “Oho! Thsts just the start of the story. This guys whole crew came at me and I single handed my took them all down. I sent them all to Davy Joseph’s locker! One guy I smashed a beer bottle on his head and there was blood everywhere! The other guy I took his eyes out and hey what’s up with navy? Why is he crying so bad”. By now blue was crying too. “Snf wy do you hafta tell every gorey detail? We wanted to hear about your Snf scars not all the murders you did the get them”.

Blue left reds room hugging navy. Five minutes later sans came in looking mad, with navy and blue clinging to him. “Hey what did I do?” “You scared the babies! You know these two are sensitive about blood. Do it again and thte blood spilled might be yours”. “Try it and the blood spilled is gonna be yours”. Sans and red glared at each other, forehead to forehead. Sans growled and left reds room to help calm the little beans down.

Edge came to reds room. “Hey I wanna hear about your scars and all the battle you fought! Wanna hear about how I got this scar? The person didn’t even finish giving it to me before he was dead” “yeah!”

You gotta consider your audience when telling a story.

#undertale #one peice #undertale au #ut #one peice au #navy the skeleton #red #underfell

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literaphobe · 4 years

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season one of she-ra rated by catradora content

the sword part 1: right off the bat we find out just what adora’s all about. she’s a so called goody two shoes but she’ll lie to authority to protect catra.... ok lesbian lmao. but then we meet catra and she’s like “hey adora ;) how’s it hanging?” and we get it. we completely get it. oh my god. everything from the way catra talks to the way she laughs. adora never stood a chance :( we get a classic locker room flirting scene where catra teases adora and adora pretends she’s above all that only to be like hey cat gf is that a MOUSE which is very rude :( don’t scare ur cat gf or she will become evil :( oh wait. anyway.... their flirting gets cut short because homophobia walks in and separates them :/ before that tho she praises adora. adora who loves her gf so much ignores shadow weaver’s praise and says “catra did so good tho <3” and puts her arm around catra which pisses off the only homophobe in etheria. adora doesn’t really want to follow shadow weaver because she just wants to be with catra, and she even argues with shadow weaver about bringing catra onto the field with her. but she loses the argument because shadow weaver fucking sucks and has no idea how to be chill :/ catra finds adora after that and greets adora the way all gals greet their pals. by... pouncing on her waist. ok lol. catra is so proud of her gf getting promoted and says baby i love you <3 baby when are we leaving <3 except adora says catra’s not allowed to come :( so cat gf gets sad and runs to the roof. in response, adora gets a literal Grappling Hook to chase after her. adora doesn’t want her gf to be sad so she steals a skiff and they go on a date <3 but they’re so obsessed with control and play fighting with each other that adora falls off the skiff and finds out she’s like. god with a sword. i mean she-ra. uh, so adora fake wakes up in a dream and is like catra? :( because catra is the only thing she ever looks for when she wakes up (yes i am clowning. of course i know catra was the only person she was with but shhhh), and then she wakes up for real and catra is straddling her waist, which... ok. catra worries about her gf maybe being brain damaged so they cut their date short and go back to the fright zone. they go to sleep, and have their nightly sleepover, which means they sleep in the same bed :) even tho catra’s own bed is already on top of adora’s :) superb :) anyway adora dreams about her lesbian sword and wakes up scared. she smiles when she sees catra sleeping soundly in her bed however because uwu cat gf go zzzzz. adora gets out of bed which catra IMMEDIATELY senses because she opens her eyes right after and follows adora. because uh.... their friendship is just that lit and strong. catra is worried and wants to follow her gf to find this cool lesbian sword she keeps talking about, but adora makes perhaps one of the worst calls ever and tells catra to stay behind because she doesn’t want to get catra in trouble :( which is like, she has good intentions and all, but you should always bring your gymnast cat gf along when u look for sick ass gay swords. adora would know that if she wasn’t raised by the literal embodiment of gay oppression. oh well. guess they’re gonna have to fight each other for five seasons to figure it out. 9.5/10 because we got so much content all literally in the first ep. it’s like hey look they’re in love and they’re girlfriends who touch each other way too much. and we’re like noelle that’s really cool! will we get more gf content? and noelle said yes but also you’ve got a big storm coming! and it’s going to kill you!

the sword part 2: against adora’s wishes, catra gets in trouble for adora’s departure, and this makes catra sad bc where did her gf go? :( shadow weaver accuses catra of knowing where adora is because despite her raging homophobia she still knows that adora wouldn’t go anywhere without telling catra. and she’s right but just because she’s right doesn’t mean i have to like her. anyway... catra gets sent to bring adora back to the fright zone, and even tho shadow weaver threatens her in scary horrid ways catra is only happy to see adora again and once again pins her to the ground with her knees on adora’s.... yea........ and she’s happy bc she has a tank :) good for u catra we all love and cherish you <3333 anyway catra makes fun of adora because she thought adora got captured which... technically true but also not but also! catra sees a flower in adora’s hair which she takes to mean that adora cheated on her :( wtf :( and adora says no baby :( no i didn’t cheat on u :( and catra is like. ok fine. let’s go back to the horde. and adora says baby we can’t go back to the horde :( did u know that they were evil? im woke now. come be woke with me. and catra is like. wait. u just realized the horde sucks? did you not see shadow weaver electrocute me. did you think she did that for gay rights? and adora is like catra baby i didn’t mean it like that :( but it’s too late. it’s all very upsetting and i don’t wanna get into it. essentially catra thinks she can escape shadow weaver’s abuse by fighting the horde from within but adora thinks she can escape shadow weaver’s abuse and the horde’s evil by literally escaping the horde. u can see where both of them are coming from and that’s why it’s so sad :( it’s so fucking sad y’all :( they do their whole. come with me vs stay with me thing,,, and it doesn’t work out. duh it’s like ep 2 why would it work out. catra finds out that adora can use her lesbian sword to turn into a taller lesbian and instead of giving into her gayness and marrying adora right away her internalized homophobia makes her run away :( she thought adora doesn’t care about her anymore because she has new friends and can turn into a giant sword lady :( and it’s all very sad :( 8.5/10

razz: adora’s having trouble turning into she-ra. no one asked, but based on this whole show, it’s because she just broke up with catra and that hit hard :( it’s pretty hard to turn into ur superhero alter ego when you’re yearning. back at the horde, catra is also yearning. she is bitter because everyone is raving about how lit she-ra is and catra is like yeah she-ra is sexy but can we have a discussion about how she-ra breaks your heart. how she-ra makes you cry. how she-ra abandons you for new friends and doesn’t want to be your gf anymore? have we considered that? and everyone is confused because why does catra seem like she knows she-ra so well. didn’t you just meet her catra? and even tho catra is a bitter ex who’s angry and wants revenge she’s still like. in love with adora and wants to protect her. so she acts cool and doesn’t tell anyone that adora is she-ra. even tho lonnie tells catra not to be so feral because “adora’s not here to protect you anymore” catra still wants to protect adora. okay. yes the thought of that does make me wanna cry. what about it. catra goes and lies on their shared adora’s bed. and she sees the teeny drawing of catra and adora on the bed frame. it reminds catra of the break up and she scratches adora’s picture. she regrets it like instantly and starts destroying the bed. and she cries. she like cries real tears what the FUCK. and then SHADOW WEAVER WALKS IN?? rude much?? can’t a girl get some privacy as she mourns a break up with a girl she’s been in love with her whole life but technically never dated for real? 9/10

flowers for she-ra: adora realizes that it’s a pretty bad idea to break up with your girlfriend when you spent your whole life sleeping in the same room/same bed as her and she comes to the Very Shocking realization that she gasp! cannot sleep without catra! wow who would have thought! so she immediately goes on a search for a sleeping partner rebound... who is glimmer (sorry glimmer it’s her first time not having her gf) and she even sleeps at glimmer’s feet the way we saw catra sleep at adora’s feet. really makes you wonder if catra and adora take turns doing that? sleeping at each other’s feet because their internalized homophobia (thanks a lot shadow bitch) prevented them from going a step further and sleeping in each other’s arms... oh well. meanwhile, catra is gloating about being force captain, but she’s also Still protecting adora’s identity as she-ra. and apparently, drawing pictures of she-ra? that she hid from shadow weaver? is that what happened? i can’t tell if she drew that picture or not but the way it looks from the scene she Definitely drew that picture! hello????? anyway, catra’s still crying to anyone that has ears about how her gf dumped her, when really it was kind of a mutual break up that was entirely shadow weaver’s fault even tho she wasn’t there. sigh. i’m bringing this up to a 7/10 because of “it’s just a phase! she’s confused, i’ll bring her back, i swear :(“

the sea gate: “i’ve got something more important to do” and here we see the start of catra literally abandoning all other duties because she would rather go flirt with her enemy gf... she literally hopped onto she-ra’s sword.... she insult her gf....... she brag to her gf about achievement.... but she also want her gf back :( adora refuses to go back to the land of oppression tho so they get into a. really suggestive fight. and catra always makes adora leaving the horde out to be adora leaving her.... she’s like babe i am literally so sexy. why would you dump me :( i’m hot :( and she’s right but i hate them. can y’all just like. not be so gay? :/ it’s starting to make me a lil bit homophobic tbh! and catra whispers into adora’s ear but it’s kind of like an insult so she gets water slapped and is forced to stop flirting :( boooo 8.5/10

system failure: hm. catra wasn’t in this ep? damn :( it’s a great ep but it’s pretty hard to find any catradora if adora is delirious the whole time and catra isn’t there. but! drunk/high adora existing gives us an idea of what she would be like around catra. 1/10 for the potential

in the shadows of mystacor: catra’s face when she sees adora in shadow weaver’s spy cam thing... interesting. she also acts like she’s So Sick of the adora missions which is true but also she is lying. kind of annoying that shadow weaver would be like. homophobic. but when she’s messing with adora’s head in mystacor she uses catra’s voice and laugh to achieve maximum effect :/ which like. thanks? but catra wasn’t actually there so shadow weaver really full on gaybaited adora huh :/ adora eventually defeats shadow weaver and we finally see catra again uwu she ends up plotting to kidnap bow and glimmer but the line “if you want to take down adora, you have to go for the heart” is so interesting because we eventually find out just how much of adora’s heart is filled with catra... 4/10 on its own 6/10 if you let the heart comment ruin your life!

princess prom: ARE Y’ALL READY TO PARTY oh my god,,, this is it you guys. this is THE ep. so funny of adora to be like. i have so many plans for every single thing that might happen. i am GOING to spend the party getting princess frosta to join the rebellion. and then catra shows up and adora is like nvm. what if i followed catra wherever she went instead. which is very interesting! adora, sweet baby, why do you always assign yourself to fight/follow/chase catra? when according to her in future eps is actually a bad decision which we can infer from her saying stuff like catra knows my every move she will be able to take me down,, ok then stop hogging her all the time?? anyway. let’s get into things chronologically. “how dare those princesses pretend they’re better than you? just because you’re different? how dare they abandon people just because they don’t fit in with their perfect little lives? how DARE they take best friends and turn them into giant sword ladies who run off with people clearly inferior to you?!” catra.... u got sth to say there buddy? :/ u got something u wanna get off your chest? :/ u had us in the beginning but then you started to get really specific :/ what’s that about sweetie :/ catra’s coping mechanism for this is to put on a really hot suit and going to princess prom to seduce the shit outta adora? fucking genius. yes she also kidnapped two people but let’s focus on the ingenuity of catra’s plan to make adora hot and heavy and also somehow jealous the entire time. incredible. so, catra shows up at the prom with scorpia and adora immediately starts bickering with her about rules. she fails to get catra kicked out so she resolves to stalk her instead! and catra... oh catra... she puts on a whole show..... performing everything from popping a tiny cake into her mouth to circling around a pillar seductively and dropping a note into a bin that says hi adora >:3 with a drawing of catra’s face that she worked hard on!! and adora looks like a crazy stalker ex gf and everyone is like damn.... u ok? :/ but adora doesn’t have time to care too much aside from a little “haha i swear i’m not a weirdo!” look because her mind is just screaming CATRA CATRA CATRA and she finds catra creeping up to entrapta. but ofc catra’s not trying to push entrapta off the ledge! no! she’s using entrapta to make adora jealous :3 catra pulls entrapta close and says “she stole my food and then asked me to spy on people with her. is this what love feels like?” and it WORKS and adora has to pull entrapta aside and be all hey i know we’re not super close yet but the bro code kinda states that u don’t date ur friend’s ex :/ so could you please back off? and entrapta is like say what now? ur gf just ditched btw so adora goes running after catra again and surprise surprise! it’s time to dance! and there are romantic lights and music! and uh oh! everyone else has a partner except for catra! guess this means adora’s gotta dance with her ohhhhh noooooooo :/ “i don’t know about you.... but i am having a blast” i really don’t think catra was lying!! i am on the verge of passing out!! adora moving away from catra after saying “whatever it is you’re planning, it won’t work!” and catra, many dance partners later, slamming back into adora’s body to continue their conversation with “maybe my plan won’t work, but then again...” THE DIP!!!!!!! “maybe it already has...” oh my god you guys. what the fuck. like they get into an angry shove fight after this but the tension! the tension! and then adora LIFTS catra up in the air? real close? they get ice blocked by frosta after this, more specifically she traps adora because she shoved catra first djfjdjdjdjd,,, after telling glimmer to find bow catra grazes adora’s chin with her tail to remind her that she’s still here!! don’t neglect!! and catra says the iconic “it was fun distracting you though ;)” line that adora was clearly affected by because she memorizes it and says it back to catra..... years later. i CANNOT make any of this shit up. what the fuck y’all. the fact that these evaluations are so long bother me but i HAVE to call these hoes out!! moving on, adora runs after catra in a very dramatic chase/fight scene, and adora is very amped up on uh, hormones. she catches catra at a “dead end” and goes “hah! trapped >:)” which is such a stupid thing to say to ur cat gf who can jump very high, so catra says “you wish ;)” and it is just. everything they are saying sounds very suggestive okay why are they LIKE THIS anyway catra jumps up some floating ice and adora follows her up the floating ice because she’s gay and she will jump however much is required of her to chase her gf down ok!! and so adora and catra are now on some ice cliff where adora keeps lunging and they’re also kind of like dancing? and catra is being very ~smooth~ dodging all of adora’s strikes and hitting her in one move. that’s kind of cool but also don’t bully your gf :( come on catra :( not cool :( but adora doesn’t give up and they continue fighting, until one missed move from catra nearly sends her off the cliff. but adora thinks she’s hot and she’s in love with her so she’s like nooo catra don’t fall off this cliff ur so sexy aha and catches her by. the waist. not the hand! but by the waist. any normal person would’ve gone for the hand. factually speaking, catra’s hand is easier to reach than her waist. but adora’s a hoe. so, she grabs catra by the waist and pulls her in closer by grabbing! oh you guessed it! her chest! like she grabs her shirt but it’s the part of the shirt that was at the chest. what the fuck. they both get this look in their eye that makes it seem like they want to kiss each other???? hello????????? and like. very upsettingly we now know that they’ve always wanted to kiss each other so. that knowledge makes watching this scene even worse. they shouldn’t have become enemies if they were going to be this horny. they’re so distracted by each other’s lips that they forget they’re standing at the edge of a cliff and guess what! they fall off the cliff! what a twist! but adora is like i’m NOT going to die because i was distracted by catra’s lips, so she grabs her hair stick thing and stabs it into the ice cliff. she grabs catra by the hand to save her, not the waist this time, because holding catra’s hand is also gay so she might as well do it. too bad catra lets go of her hand and ditches her tho :( i would minus points for that except it wouldn’t make much of a difference. catra says “see you later, princess ;)” because she’s already expecting to see adora again.... good lord 4828473737373/10 thanks noelle! i died

no princess left behind: but i’m a buddhist so i’m back. we open with catra laughing so prettily looking at her gf’s lesbian sword. very cute. later on, when shadow weaver betrays catra and tells her to go pack her things because she’s not needed anymore... adora gives her this look? :( she looks like she feels bad because catra’s clearly still suffering under shadow weaver’s thumb. but let’s zero in on the most important part! catra dragging the sword and pointing it at adora, before turning it around and giving it to her. “this is NOT because i like you” ok catra i didn’t think that before but now i Absolutely believe that you did this because you like adora. and u can tell adora kind of is like. ready to start her whole “you can come with me! we can be together! :(“ thing but things are complicated and catra told her to Just Go so... it is a lot and we know things are deeper than just catra liking adora but we will get emo over that later. 9/10 that was a good fucking scene

the beacon: “she left me behind too, like i was nothing :(“ some people say this is catra manipulating entrapta, and they are correct, but also she’s like.. “oh adora left you too? mad kin :(“ she was deadass about to start a support group with entrapta and technically she kind of did! good for them <3 catra goes to look for first ones tech and adora goes to look for the beacon to learn how to heal and guess what happens! they’re looking for the same place! catra’s “on second thought... hey adora >;)” at the end pushes this up to an 8/10, but that’s just like the last five seconds of the ep so objectively the rest of the ep was like. 4/10 idk lmaoooo

promise: finally some good fucking food. catra follows adora into the beacon and has a little fun spying on her and enjoying her epic fails at getting information on she-ra. she also finds the first one tech she needs, because she’s a multitasker and she can spy on her gf while doing important missions <3 but also she gets caught and adora nearly kills her fksjdjd “hey watch it! >:(“ is so funny because catra??? u are trespassing???? but also uwu baby yeah don’t accidentally kill ur gf adora :( adora’s reaction is also very funny “catra? what are you doing here? :O” as if catra hasn’t shown up at 70% of the places adora has been, but the way she asks it’s like. adora is happy to see catra? pleasantly surprised? man she is whipped. anyway, adora tries to pull the Tough Girlfriend move and like, mildly scold catra for trespassing into a building where only one person (she-ra) is allowed to be in. but she still grabs catra’s hand and guides her to an escape path :’) she lifts up a giant door thing and waits until catra runs in to let go and run after her <3 chivalry isn’t dead after all <3 they get into a lover’s tiff as they run for their lives and essentially it’s like “babe wtf WHY are giant mutant spiders trying to kill us isn’t this ur house” “they’re trying to kill YOU this is why you ring the doorbell instead of running in secretly after i open the door!” “oh and how was i supposed to know that! why can’t you just tell your teenage mutant ninja spiders to chill out??” “they’re not house-trained babe :( i moved in two minutes ago they came with the apartment” anyway the angry spider monsters catch up to them so catra goes “adora? :(“ and that’s enough for adora to take Direct Action so she slashes the walls and ceiling of the room they’re in before grabbing catra to shield them both. she is NOT getting her deposit back but uwu anything to keep gf safe <3 adora transforms back to her usual body and she once again reminds catra that she’s Not Supposed To Be Here and she’s like “god now i have to like Protect You and it’s gonna put my life in danger :/ haha what are you gonna do for me in return tho ;)” and catra is like. “well good thing i didn’t ASK you to protect me” so adora is like :( —> >:( wait u know what??? ok u know what????? why are u here >:( how’d u find me?? >:( and do u mean any of this in a gay way?? >:( say it’s in a gay way right now >:( and catra is like. ur gay castle sent a gay beam of light into the sky. i saw it immediately bc im gay but i do NOT mean this in a gay way. and adora is like oh :( ok :’( and then asks about shadow weaver bc she saw what went down in the horde and she like. i think she can tell shadow weaver still exerts some form of control that catra hasn’t broken free from? :( and then catra is like haha shadow weaver is a LOSER and adora starts giving her Gay Looks and it makes catra scared because her gf now thinks she has a crush on her!!!!!!! how Embarrassing!! “ugh, i knew you’d be weird about me letting you escape” ok so why did you say that thing about not liking her? “i told you it’s not because i like you!” there it is! that’s EXACTLY what i thought you’d say you lesbian! and the way she says it??? she definitely likes adora???? she is so bad at lying?????? and adora is so smug about it like her Face plus her crossed arms and the whole “i mean, i didn’t ;) i didn’t say anything ;)” her eyes.... your honor she’s gay...... she’s like what if we were in my secret castle..... standing amongst the rubble because i destroyed the infrastructure to protect you..... and we were both girls....... adora was Ready to turn her sword into a Bed right then and there ok!!! it’s not me it’s Her Eyes,,, anyway catra starts being salty again and brings up bow and glimmer and is like hey where’s those idiots u dumped me for :/ thought you looooooved hanging out with them and doing everything with them :/ like we used to :/ are they not as fun to hang out with adora is that why you’re standing in this spider infested building with me instead :/ and adora suddenly remembers that she can’t just be horny and that she has to hold catra accountable for her actions so she’s like oh my friends? the ones who u kidnapped and held for ransom???? >:( and catra is like ya what other friends would i be talking about :/ like god i know she’s evil but she’s so funny take her back adora :( jk ik ur gonna start begging her to Come With You in like minutes u absolute simp. but before that happened catra was like fuck u lets Split Up >:( we already broke up why would we run away from spiders together huh? unless u still like me? but clearly there’s only one way for them to walk so they can’t split up just yet and adora gives catra this >:( look so catra is like FINE one last date and they walk away together. they go into this... dark room and catra wants to leave the dark room because she’s scared of ghosts :( jk but the door disappears and something scans catra and adora and light hope is like cool! time to show them memories that are specifically picked to make catra resent adora! which :( not cool light hope :( i get that ur a bot who’s programmed to serve the homophobic agenda but damn u were gay once too :( anyway they’re sent to a memory in the fright zone and adora gets Angry bc she thinks catra tricked her and catra is like i wouldn’t play u like that :( and she finds out it’s all fake so she’s like adora :D u don’t have to be scared or mad at me anymore! :D she goes to look for adora but adora’s watching a memory of them when they were six and being really cute. back when adora had the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair and only really cared about making catra happy and having her back. catra blinded octavia and insulted her and adora was still like: ur not bleeding ur bones aren’t broken and u picked a pointless fight with someone who did not provoke you in any way. where is she i will insult her some more. i love u. like damn adora really do be a ride or die girl huh!! she’s still like this but they both have too many issues to realize it :( anyway catra and adora slip into the catra and adora of their memories and begin running off together holding hands............ and then they Realize they’re running off together Holding Hands....... and catra pulls away because of her internalized homophobia :( devastating. they get into a tiny little fight over magic and kidnapping again and then adora’s face softens and she’s like catra :( why Did you let me escape :( i know i made fun of u for it before but i legit do not know if u meant it in a gay way. pls confirm? :( u could have gotten caught catra :( why did u risk it :( is it because you secretly want to run away with me and join the rebellion? :( and be my gf? :( she’s so caught up in her questions that she nearly falls off a cliff AGAIN and catra catches her by the hand because these girls are obsessed with almost falling off cliffs to their deaths and saving each other. don’t judge them their Intricate Rituals are THAT deep. and catra is like. did you really think. i would let shadow weaver erase your memory like that? and risk you forgetting our relationship? even towards the end when we were broken up and fighting each other it was kinda lit and i want u to remember it. and adora is an idiot so she’s like idk lmao probably aren’t u like evil now and catra is like well you have a point but also fuck u for thinking i don’t care about u,,, u never did have too much faith in me :( and adora is like can u blame me :( and catra is like ur hot so.... no. i will let my tail linger on your hand as a hint that i still love you. and then catra is like.... adora i know u said fuck horde rights but does that include our relationship :( u had good memories right :( of me? :( and adora is like um duh??? i miss you so goddamn much too oh my god and catra is like hey how dare you imply that i missed you even tho it’s true!!! get over urself! and adora is like not until you admit you like me ;) and they play fight again because the rituals are so intricate..... and catra lies and says she doesn’t like adora ok lmao... they enter the next memory and it’s catra and adora sparring and they’re competitive but it’s also flirty? catra pretends to be hurt to get adora to let her guard down but lonnie interferes and this causes adora to beat catra. which. yeah :( and after adora wins she does the good gf thing where she asks catra if she’s okay and catra’s not ok but she lies and hides away to cry :( and we get it babe we do!! it’s hard being in love with someone who you’re also resentful of because you’re raised in a competitive environment and always treated like you’re worthless in comparison :( but the simulation stops and catra is caught by one of the spiders and adora doesn’t manage to save her in time, grabbing her hand only to fail and have catra slip through her fingers :( they scream for each other but catra manages to get the upper hand on the spider monster, except adora charges in at the last second and delivers the final blow, further driving home the false point that light hope is trying to make :( adora just wants to protect catra but because of their upbringing catra sees it as adora always wanting to be the best and adora thinking she’s better than catra hence her telling catra what to do “all the time” which isn’t totally true but it’s what catra has been led to believe :( and also adora’s upbringing plays into it too because she thinks she has to save everyone and take responsibility for everything and it’s all just really sad bros :( what the fuck :( adora apologizes for leaving again and tries to convince catra she never meant to leave her and that she wants catra to come with her because she knows catra isn’t a bad person :( and you can see!! catra considering it!! but then precisely BECAUSE catra is considering it the memory simulation thing kicks in again and... hoo boy. we see catra and adora sneak into the black garnet chamber, after being cute and competitive and running around the horde swinging from wire to wire.... they get caught by shadow weaver and she specifically punishes only catra. and it’s so fucked because it puts adora in this position of guilt where she always feels like she has to protect adora whilst slowly brainwashing her over the years into believing that catra does do disobedient things and that adora can only escape that if she’s always perfect and taking charge of everything. and for catra.... it takes the mutually loving relationship they have and poisons it because shadow weaver makes it very clear that to her, catra’s only redeeming quality is that adora favors her? and if not for that she would be disposed of? and so it’s very hard for catra to find individuality and a healthy connection to adora which created unresolved resentment and issues and just... :( and the whole confrontation they have after the simulation ends... adora could never protect catra in the way she needed to be protected because adora was also a child, and receiving a different form of abuse, and it’s just. harder for catra to leave? especially because she didn’t receive a sudden destiny the way adora did and her issues with the horde were never limited to morality. and so catra is just. she has way too much to work through and she can’t see past her resentment for adora because the machine is making her remember all of it. and so she tells a half truth and half lie to adora about giving her the sword because she didn’t want adora to come back :( catra runs away from adora and is attacked by flashes of memory. and then she faces one last memory alone. and it’s the promise adora made to catra when they were kids, about always looking out for each other, and catra looks at kid!catra and thinks adora has broken that promise, still stinging from the hurt of adora leaving her behind after finding the sword and becoming she-ra. it was never meant to be like this but catra is hurting so she focuses only on her side of things and how she saw these events play out and she :( decides to kind of betray adora? it hurts So Much because adora looks so hopeful when she sees catra while hanging on for dear life, and she thinks catra will save her again but catra talks about how the sword won’t work for her because she’s never been the Special One like adora was always heralded to be in the horde. and having adora literally be she-ra just drives that point home for catra and she hates adora for it because this means all the other stuff she believes is true too. adora made her feel weak on purpose, adora made catra think she needed her on purpose. “every hero needs a sidekick, right?” and adora’s “catra, no, that’s not how it was!” hits even harder now because we know that adora just. loved catra. she was in love with her but adora was also like catra in that she’s a product of her circumstances and upbringing. she was the way she is as a means of survival. but the one thing there that was pure and true was that they loved each other.... upsettingly neither of them can see that. catra goes down even further into the path of evil and thinks that. being free of adora. is the thing that will liberate her and bring her happiness. which. she is wrong about. but she can’t exactly see all that clearly right now :( and adora begging catra not to “do this” which... means she’s begging her not to leave? “bye adora! i really am going to miss you” and adora’s desperation skyrockets but it’s too late :( catra doesn’t come back for her and adora cries.... and it’s just so insane that literally everyone who wants to control adora focuses on poisoning her bond with catra because that’s the relationship that... matters most to her in the world. when you’ve loved someone your whole life it hurts when they betray you and it hurts to betray them too, as we can see from catra when she arrives back at the horde. she essentially looks Wrecked and freezes up when scorpia calls her “the best friend ever!” but i want to make one quick note of her “personal space” talk with scorpia? like fjdjdjdjd you have never had personal space with adora not once in your life ok that’s reserved for the gf only i see. 10/10 i am so wrecked emotionally this is way too much but also because it makes me so emo i will give it a perfect score but nothing else. no bonus points because i do not want to reward putting me in pain!

light hope: light hope showing adora the memories that make her feel guilty and it’s the first scene where catra sees her as she-ra and walks away.... adora’s been feeling guilty over catra since the moment she failed at getting catra to leave the horde :( 3/10

the battle of bright moon: “catra will be leading the horde when they attack. i have to face her.” it’s so interesting how there’s so many pressing things at hand? the weather is screwy, the alliance is broken, no one’s coming to save them, the rebellion could be crushed, but the thing that is really bothering adora, the thing that she brings up first, is catra. “i saw catra in there. i thought i could get through to her, but all i did was push her farther to the side of evil” she sounds... so heartbroken about it all :( catra and adora meet on the battlefield and the first thing catra says is,,, u guessed it,,,, “hey adora.” and adora’s like “catra. surprised to see me?” and like damn they’re really so good at being enemies. the talent. the tension. impeccable. and then catra says nah i didn’t think u died and im glad u made it out alive. and adora, bless her soul, is like oh.... u mean in a gay way..... u didn’t want me to die..... for homosexual reasons?? and catra is like no! haha! i uh, i just wanted to kill u in a cooler much sexier way. and adora is like oh :( oh >:( oh >:’( and they get into a very heated sexy fight like catra wanted. and they taunt each other like. “i thOUgHt yOU weRe suPposED tO bE stRoNG” “aND i tHouGHt yOu wERe sUpPOsEd tO bE fAst” you know. very cool well crafted taunts. and like. they fight a lot which is kind of sad but also kind of sexy because their styles are like? similar and different? which is the dumbest way to compare any two things ever but like :( y’all get what i mean right :( we get one more Hanging Off A Cliff scene and this time adora grabs catra by the chest and shoves her against the wall, and catra is like cool! but u did this,, for what? and then adora realizes catra was just distracting her Again and bright moon is very badly under attack :( catra bids her adieu so adora can run back and fight. but she like. gets caught :( and catra walks up to her and gently caresses her cheek before adora passes out and it’s evil but it’s also tender? but it’s also evil i know i know :( all of the princesses come to help adora so she sends a beam of magic gay light and heals everything and then all the princesses send a gay tsunami washing over catra. the horde loses, and catra retreats in a skiff, but adora and catra exchange one more Look as she leaves... hm. 9/10

#text #she ra #catradora #spop #this post... is so stupidly long #its essentially like a recap shitpost #but i give it a score out of 10 #i considered redoing the whole post but :(#it is what it is:(#hope y'all like this #please at least find this mildly entertaining #i hope to god the read more thing doesn't break #because...... this is long apologies in advance #hope its not too hard to read

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