#they are MARRIED i am INTO THEM BEING MARRIED

[musaslullaby]

Is the princess really getting married?

Charles leclerc x fem reader

Summary: The Princess of Monaco is getting married, but the fans don't know who the lucky one is.

Face: people on Pinterest, and the driver.

Warning: fluff, Instagram AU.

A/N: There will be a second part.

Masterlist

¸¸♬·¯·♩¸¸♪·¯·♫¸¸¸¸♬·¯·♩¸¸♪·¯·♫¸¸¸¸♬·¯·♩¸¸♪·¯·♫¸¸¸¸♬·¯·♩¸¸♪·¯·♫¸¸¸¸♬·¯·♩¸¸♪·¯·♫¸¸¸¸♬·¯·♩¸¸/Ynofficial

Description: Me every time they tell me I should go get ready.

Liked by user56, lewishaamilton, and other 948.983.

user43: Yn doesn’t want to be a princess anymore.

user32: Let’s switch places, girl. ❤️ Like to author

yourbrother: Yn, you shouldn’t post these things.

Ynofficial: Don’t be so strict.

yourbrother: I’m just trying to keep you on the right track.

Ynofficial: How boring.

user3: The best princess I’ve ever seen.

user12: This is too funny.

user34: POV: How to pretend not to be a princess.

❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: POV: It’s not a POV.

user34: YNNNN!!!!

Ynofficial: Yes, that’s my name.

yourbrother: What am I going to do with you? ❤️ Like to author

user78: What do you have to do today?

Ynofficial: Another one of those shoots for something, honestly, I don’t even know.

user23: Wait, you’re doing a photoshoot and you don’t even know what for?

Ynofficial: Exactly.

Ynofficial

Description: At least I have him to keep me company.

Liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, and other 8.483.939.

user45: How cuteeee.

user67: The luckiest little dog in the world.

user221: Yn doesn’t need a boyfriend; she has her dog.

❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: I totally agree.

yourbrother: He’s the only one who deserves to live in the palace.

Ynofficial: I know you love my son more than me, thanks.

yourbrother: I never said that.

Ynofficial: So, you love me?

yourbrother: You trapped me. ❤️ Like to author

user21: The last photo is worthy of a queen.

user34: Maybe you meant goddess?

user56: Guys, doesn’t that dog look like Leclerc’s dog?

user7: Who’s Leclerc?

f1lover: How can you not know? He’s a god on earth.

user90: He’s an F1 driver who has a dog of the same breed named Leo.

user50: Now that I think about it, they adopted them around the same time.

user54: Coincidence?

Ynofficial

Description: Okay, okay, I have to admit I had fun this time.

Liked by user43, checoperez, and other 98,453.

yourbrother: I told you.

Ynofficial: You usually tell a lot of lies.

user45: I love the relationship between Yn and her brother.

❤️ Like to author

user6: The heir to the Monaco throne.

user7: He’s very kind, I met him.

Ynofficial: Try living with him, then we’ll see.

user21: Were the jewels real?

Ynofficial: Yes, and they’re really heavy too.

user6: I wouldn’t want to be in your shoes.

Ynofficial: The clothes are super uncomfortable tooooo.

user67: But they’re beautiful.

user0: They look amazing on her.

Ynofficial: I can’t wait to take them off.

Ynofficial

Description: A date before saying goodbye.

Liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, and other 4.784.839.

user21: Who are you with, girl?

Ynofficial: With a human being.

user6: The luckiest human in the world. ❤️ Like to author

user5: YN OF MONACO WHAT ARE YOU DOING??

user34: Thank you, Yn.

user1: Whoever it is should thank their lucky stars every day to be with someone like Yn.

❤️ Like to author

user45: So, is she engaged??

user41: Yn, don’t play these tricks on us.

user67: It’s not funny.

user3: I love the dress.

Ynofficial: I don’t, they forced me to wear it.

user56: No way we could afford it.

user32: I wish I were a princess.

Ynofficial: Wish granted, please come take my place.

user6: Guys, isn’t the Monaco GP today?

user5: Oh God, you’re right.

user43: Do you think she’s going to the GP?

user8: I didn’t know she was into F1.

user09: Neither did I.

user5: Yn is the black sheep of the family.

❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: You’re absolutely right.

user56: That description doesn’t sound like you.

❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: Sorry, too poetic.

yourbrother: Mom wants to talk to you.

user6: Trouble’s coming.

Ynofficial: Time to run off to Mexico. Checo, will you host me?

checoperez: Whenever you want. ❤️ Like to author

user32: Wait, they know each other???

user9: Did I miss something?

user78: What does this dialogue even mean?

user76: YN?

Ynofficial

Description: Guess who’s not supposed to be wandering around the paddock?

Liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and other 877.473.738.

gp1: YN OF MONACO.

vroom: Wait, they allowed her to go to the GP??

race: I think at least someone from the royal family always has to be there?

user43: YN, DID YOU MEET CHARLES?

Ynofficial: 🤫🤫.

16_55: IT’S A YESSS.

user2: MY TWO FAVORITE PEOPLE MEETING. ❤️ Like to author

yourbrother: Where did you go? Mom’s going to be very angry.

Ynofficial: Cover for me.

yourbrother: Wait, what?

Ynofficial: Thanks, love you.

yourbrother: No, Yn, come back here, we agreed to stay low-key.

Ynofficial: No one will see me.

yourbrother: That includes me too, right?

Ynofficial: Maybe yes, maybe no.

63_: I love this woman.

user42: Is the car comfortable?

Ynofficial: My princess ass didn’t appreciate it.

user21_: That’s why you’re my favorite princess.

Ynofficial: I don’t think you know any others.

danielricciardo: Princess Yn is a fan of mine.

Ynofficial: You’re my childhood.

danielricciardo: I’m not that old.

Ynofficial: Don’t worry, Daniel, it’s hard to accept.

landonorris: Wait, Daniel met her and I didn’t?

maxverstappen1: He’s just privileged.

Ynofficial: I’m coming to you, don’t fight.

user98: Everyone wants Yn. ❤️ Like to author

81_4: She’s anything but a princess.

f1lover: Please marry me.

Ynofficial: Sorry, I’m a bit busy.

Ynofficial

Description: As a good princess, I have to congratulate Charles Leclerc for winning his home race, Monaco. Congratulations, Predestined One.

Liked by charles_leclerc, f1, and other 42.457.473

f1lover: How sweet, Yn.

ferrarifan: After this post, I’m over the moon.

race_: The Monaco curse is broken.

❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: Yes, but now Charles has to endure at least a month of bad luck.

charles_leclerc: Thank you, Yn. ❤️ Like to author

charles_leclerc: I thank you, Your Highness, for wasting two minutes to make the post. ❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: Consider yourself lucky.

landonorris: Will the next victory post be dedicated to me?

georgerussell63: Keep dreaming, mate. ❤️ Like to author

oscarpiastri: Charles has reached the pinnacle of his career after this post.

carlossainz55: I can hear him laughing and blushing from here. ❤️ Like to author

maxverstappen1: Princess, may I humbly request your attention? ❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: I always have my full attention on you, Max Emilian Verstappen.

charles_leclerc: No, today is my day, step aside. ❤️ Like to author

user56: Is Charles jealous??

user45: Max asking for Yn’s attention?

Ynofficial

Description: I can officially say I’m off-limits.

Liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, and other 98,457.633.

yourbrother: I’m so happy for you, little sister.

❤️ Like to author

landonorris: Can I be the best man?

Ynofficial: No, you might show up to the wedding already drunk.

maxverstappen1: You said yesss! ❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: I said yesss!

georgerussell63: Congratulations, guys.

❤️ Like to author

lewishamilton: Congrats, but honestly, I expected it.

❤️ Like to author

oscarpiastri: He has the eyes of love.

❤️ Like to author

user44: No, okay, we need to figure out who it is.

f1lover: It’ll be the most beautiful wedding ever.

ynlove: Our little girl is growing up.

charleslec_: I hope it’s Charles.

race: It’s definitely a driver.

vroom: I don’t know; it could also be a prince or noble.

user32: I doubt it, knowing Yn.

ynqueen: Love is blind.

user3: Whoever it is, I’m so happy for you.

user77: I’m going to drop a bomb: I think it’s Max.

maxie_: Oh God, yes, can you imagine??

1_11: The best couple ever.

Ynofficial: I like your theories.

user66: Yn, help us, please.

cl16: Has anyone noticed Charles didn’t even comment?

55_: Strange.

Ynofficial

Description: Goodbye, Monaco.

Liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, and other 757.648.

yourbrother: I can’t believe mom let you go.

carlossainz55: Knowing Yn, she would’ve gone anyway. ❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: My friends know me too well.

user43: Wait, how long have they known each other???

formula1_: More importantly, since when does Yn love F1?

f1lover: It’s a new thing, actually.

race: Yn, princess of the people.

Ynofficial: Always at your service.

landonorris: Now she’s getting a big head.

charles_leclerc: As soon as they offered you to skip your duties, you accepted right away.

Ynofficial: You shouldn’t talk to a princess like that.

charles_leclerc: And you shouldn’t talk to a prince like that.

f1love: WAIT, WHAT DID CHARLES MEAN???

charlesmylife: Guys, Yn deleted it.

charelsofmonaco: No, I don’t understand.

16cl: I arrived too late 😭😭😭.

Flove1: Finally, we have proof that this man exists.

user65: I was convinced it was a joke.

user90: Secret agents of the world, unite, we need to find out who Yn’s boyfriend is.

user67: YN, WE HAVE TOO MANY QUESTIONS.

Ynofficial: And I have zero answers.

user56: Where are you running to, girl?

Ynofficial: Away from nobility.

Ynofficial

Description: I had to try the ice cream in Italy.

Liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, and other 74.673.883.

yourbrother: Bring me some.

Ynofficial: No.

charles_leclerc: I’ll bring it to you.

Ynofficial: Since when are you two so chummy?

f1lover: No okay, we missed something.

race: Something important.

Formula1: Is that Leo or Yn’s dog?

f_1: The numbers don’t add up.

user78: I can’t tell them apart.

user1: They look the same.

landonorris: Good job, Yn, distract him so I can win in Monza.

carlossainz55: NO, YN, BRING CHARLES HERE NOW.

Ynofficial: Now I don’t know what to do anymore.

user56: Yn is a princess even outside of Monaco.

user09: How cute is the guy tying her shoes?

[cressidagrey]

Stars all aligned - Chapter 1

Summary:

If there was one thing that both Azriel and Zahra Archeron had in common, it was that they were both very good at blending into the background.

They just never thought that their family were going to be the ones who never saw them at all.

Warning:

Bashing of like...every IC member? I think Rhys gets the worst though, definitely disordered eating, kinda depression?, isolation

(Lovely dividers thanks to @sweetmelodygraphics)

He found her deep inside the House of Wind. Far enough from the festivities of Starfall that it was startling to find her.

The second oldest Archeron Sister must have wandered off just like he had.

“Why aren’t you dancing?” Azriel asked her as he spied her sitting in a puddle of her skirts on one of the couches, staring at the empty fireplace.

“Why aren’t you?” Zahra gave back drily, not even looking up at him.

What exactly was he supposed to answer to that? Oh, I can't stomach watching your sister dance with her mate? And even if I could stomach that, Rhys's mental commentary to him about it had turned his stomach. Even when Azriel had kept away from Elain just like Rhysand had ordered him to do, ever since last year. So really...what was he supposed to answer?

“Dancing isn’t exactly my favourite activity,” Azriel finally replied. It wasn’t a lie. 

"Yeah, well, mine neither," she answered with a shrug. "Not that I ever learned."

"You never learned?" he asked surprised. Nesta had learned. Elain had learned.

"Bastard, remember?" Zahra said drily. "I am lucky that I got to learn how to read and write and do basic math. I was not going to be molded into a perfect lady, because no self-respecting man would marry me anyway."

The blunt way Zahra was talking stunned Azriel momentarily. There was something harsh, something almost...bitter and resentful in her voice as she spoke.

It seemed like it didn't matter if one was born a bastard in Illyria or the Human lands. It was horrible either way.

"Your sisters will miss you," he said instead quietly. "And you'll miss the spectacle."

"I don't really care for the festivities," she said with another shrug. "I don’t like the holidays. Humans don’t have any. We… they are too busy trying to survive," Zahra corrected herself quietly. "And besides, I am only here anyway so I don't end up being an indentured servant until some of you decide that I am back in your good graces,” she gave back caustically.

He grimaced. That Zahra had vehemently disagreed about their treatment of Nesta was well known.

It had surprised him too because it was just as just as well known that Nesta seemed to not care for her half-sister on a good day. They weren't particularly close, in any way, shape or form.

Something in his chest clenched painfully. Not from the insult she threw in his direction, but from the defeated way she said it. That she thought that they would just…toss her aside like that.

She was one of them.

"We won't," he said firmly. Her eyes slowly turned toward him and there were dark shadows in those eyes. Out of all the Archeron Sisters, she was the only one with green eyes. Azriel wondered if she had inherited them from her late mother.

Zahra was only the half-sister after all. The result of her father’s dalliance with a maid. Her age put her somewhere between Nesta and Elain. 

It was easy enough to pick out the differences between Nesta, Elain and Feyre and Zahra. Dark hair similar to Elain’s, but green eyes. Skin a few shades darker than any of theirs. Lips that looked like Feyre’s but a nose that looked like none of her sisters. 

Zahra seemed to belong but didn’t. 

And right now, these green eyes…something was wrong. Something was off with these eyes. 

"You don’t know that," she said with a humourless laugh. "Do you want to lie to me too, and  tell me that Rhysand has nothing to do with whatever happened between Elain and you?"

Azriel stiffened, a low sound escaping his throat. She knew. She knew.

"How did you-" he croaked hoarsely and Zahra cocked an eyebrow at him.

 "Do you really think that I hadn't noticed the two of you dancing around each other for months? Or the fact that you two can barely manage to be in the same room together?" she asked dryly and Azriel averted his gaze.  "There is no one as beautiful and kind as my sister," Zahra said drily. "I don't fault you for falling for her."

Azriel said nothing, the pain in his chest growing at her words. The pain...and the bitter realization that his feelings were not as well-hidden as he had thought they were. 

"It doesn't matter," he said quietly. "She has a mate. She deserves better than me anyway."

"Did Rhysand tell you that too?" Zahra said drily. "You never tried to hide the fact that your mate was dying from the same, so you have that on him."

Azriel gritted his teeth, the pain in his chest becoming almost unbearable. "It doesn’t matter," he repeated firmly, the words tasting like ash in his mouth. "Elain is happy. I would do nothing to put that in danger." 

"Yes, she is," Zahra agreed. "For what it's worth, I am sorry," she apologised to him, her voice honest.

Azriel swallowed, the pain in his chest lessening only to be replaced by something else. Something...much more complicated. Something like…pity.

He pitied her. This young female was so full of bitterness. He couldn’t even fault her for it either. She had been just a bastard. Even when they had first met the Archeron Sisters…Zahra had been working in the household as a maid. Half employee, half part of the family. Like their father couldn’t make up his mind what he should do with his bastard daughter. 

"You don't have anything to apologise for," Azriel finally told her quietly. "Do you really not want to watch?" he asked her. "You are supposed to wish for something when you see the stars fall."

She snorted, the sound bitter. "What I want, I am never going to get," Zahra said, her voice brittle.

He took her in in more detail at that moment.

The simple green gown she wore, high necked and long sleeved...that long gown that did little to hide how thing she was. The dark brown hair, pulled into a braid, obviously trying to hide the pointed tips of her ears and failing...the way her skin, darker than all of her sisters, was nearly ashen.

They had all thought that she was doing well. That Zahra at least was adjusting well.

But she wasn't. She wasn’t doing better.  She hadn't adjusted. Azriel would bet anything that all she wanted in her life was to be human again.

She hadn't adjusted. She just acted in a way that didn't bother anybody, that didn’t spell trouble for anybody.  Zahra had gotten herself a job, managing the accounting at an apothecary in the city.  She had gotten herself a little cottage to rent. She didn’t go out and get drunk. She didn’t use any money from Rhys or Feyre. She showed up for family dinners, staying quiet and polite. 

And if she was miserable…well, then nobody cared, because she didn’t bother anybody. Azriel could understand that. The same was the case for him.

Azriel clenched his jaw, watching her quietly sitting here. The way she was trying to hide away. The dress that was more like a potato sack than anything else. The way her skin was almost...grey. That bitter voice. 

The shadows were stirring and he was unable to look away from her. She looks upset, Master, they told him helpfully. 

"Do you want to go home?" Azriel offered quietly. Home to her cottage? Maybe some peace and quiet would make her feel better. 

Zahra shrugged, not looking at him. Not giving him an inch. That wall of bitterness and sarcasm was so firmly in place, that it was practically a solid wall between them. 

“Don’t want to end like an indentured servant, remember?“ she quipped drily.

“You won’t,“ Azriel said evenly. “You had a headache. I brought you home.“

She still didn’t look at him, her hands tightly knotted into her skirts as she sat there. She was so thin, almost fragile-looking. Her skin was sickly grey. “Come on,” he said finally, walking towards her.

Zahra finally looked up at him. Those green eyes. A bitter and lonely light in them. “What are you doing?“ she muttered. 

“I’m bringing you home,” he said simply, holding out his hand. “Come on, get up.“

Zahra looked at his hand, her gaze wary. “Why?“ she asked quietly. 

“Because you look like you are about to keel over,” he said, more bluntly than intended. 

“Gee, thanks,” she said dryly, her voice sarcastic and bitter. But she placed her hand into his own and let him pull her to her feet, even though he could feel the tension in her entire body. 

Azriel wrapped his arm around her shoulders, steadying her. “Come on. Let’s get you home and into bed,” he said firmly. 

He led her towards the balcony, the last few streaks of light painting the sky, and he grasped her tightly as they shout these few feet into the air until he could winnow to the cottage she rented. 

It’s ugly, the shadows complained. 

He had to agree with them. The cottage was an ugly little thing. Plain. Small. The type of thing that was more of a hovel in the outskirts, rather than anything else. 

“Home sweet home,“ Zahra said dryly, pulling away from him and a key out of her purse. 

That cottage was in serious need of some renovations when the red paint that was flaking off the door was anything to go by. 

As she unlocked the door it became obvious that while she kept it clean and neat.. even that couldn’t help much. This is a hovel, the shadows hissed.

Azriel was inclined to agree. He looked around with a frown, as the shadows scuttered around the tiny cottage. “You live here?“ he couldn’t help but ask. It was a terrible hovel indeed. 

Zahra shrugged as if she didn’t notice the disgust in his voice. “I couldn’t exactly afford anything else at first,” she said drily. 

At least not without taking any money from Rhys and Feyre, and clearly that was nothing that Zahra wanted to do. 

He was struck by how empty it all looked. There was a small kitchen space, a table with a few chairs a fireplace… And the door that led to her bedroom, he assumed. 

“How long have you lived here?“ he asked carefully, taking in the bare emptiness. There were no pictures on the walls. No trinkets and little belongings anywhere. It was…lifeless. She shrugged again and kicked off her shoes, making her way towards the bedroom. “A year?“

The room was equally simple and bare. A bed, a few clothes. A little bathing chamber. That was it. 

“You’ve lived here for over a year?“ Azriel repeated, his voice turning sharp as he looked at everything. There wasn’t even a mirror on the wall. 

When she just shrugged again, he was done. He grabbed her arm and towed her back into the main room. “Stay,” he ordered, pointing at the table and one of the two rickety chairs. 

“What are you doing?“ Zahra asked, raising both eyebrows at him. Her irritation had started to rise considerably. At least that had done something to the sickly colour of her skin. 

“Making sure you eat something before you pass out on me,” Azriel muttered, turning back into the kitchen area, looking around with a frown.

There was…nothing. His shadows reported as much. She literally had a few pieces of bread and some cheese in the whole house. He was more than fuming. That was not enough that she was living in…this hovel, she was apparently also starving herself.

He pointed at the chair again. “Sit,” he ordered a little sharper than he had intended. 

The glare she gave him did not surprise him. Zahra hated being ordered around. “No,” she said firmly, crossing her arms in front of her chest. “I’m not hungry.“

Azriel clenched his jaw, the anger flaring. How stubborn could she be? 

“You clearly haven’t eaten in days,” he said, pointing out the obvious. “You have nothing in your house to eat.” 

“I have what I need,” she retorted, her own anger flaring. Azriel gritted his teeth, the urge to snap at her almost overwhelming.

“You are skin and bones,” he hissed. “There is barely enough fat on you to keep out the cold.“ 

“Why do you care?“ she snapped right back.

The question hit him squarely in the chest. Why did he care? Why, he asked himself for a moment. Why indeed.

He wasn’t going to lie to himself and say that it was just because she was Feyre’s sister. 

Thankfully, Azriel was saved from actually having to answer, when her stomach grumbled.

Loudly. Azriel almost chuckled at the sound of her own stomach betraying just how hungry she really was. “Clearly your body disagrees with you,” he said drily. 

“Shut up,” Zahra snapped, her skin flushing at the sound of her own stomach. 

“I will shut up after you’ve eaten something,” Azriel said firmly, folding his arms across his chest.

Zahra gave him a glare that could strip the paint from the walls, (but then, the paint was already flaking off anyway). Still, she grudgingly sank down on the chair, her eyes avoiding his. 

He turned back into the kitchen, opening cupboards and drawers and found absolutely nothing. There was nothing. Not even some fruits or vegetables. 

He slammed the last cupboard closed, almost causing the hinges to break, the anger flaring hotly in his chest. That stupid, stubborn, stubborn woman.

“I will personally come here every day and stuff you full until you burst,” he snapped before he could stop himself.

“Why?” she asked and he could hear the challenge in her voice. Her own anger rose to meet his own. “Why would you even bother?“ 

“Because you are starving yourself,” he said, spinning around to face her. “Because you are so thin, I could snap you in half with one hand. Because I’m pretty damn sure you haven’t eaten a proper meal in at least a year. That’s why.“

“Maybe I don’t deserve a proper meal,” she shot back and something inside of him snapped at the tone in her voice. 

Because he knew that feeling. He knew. For just a moment he froze. They were far more similar than they should be. 

It was a terrible realization. He knew what the self-hatred and bitterness was like. He understood it far better than he wanted to.

“Nobody is going to suddenly show up and care,” he told her quietly. He saw her eyes flare at the words and he knew she got the meaning behind them instantly.

She sat there, her jaw tensed. “And what do you know about it?” she snapped, her voice bitter. 

“I know what it feels like to starve oneself,” he said calmly. “I know what it feels like to have not a single person notice or care.“

The words rang truer than they should. Her eyes widened for a moment, shock flashing through her. 

“I know what it feels like to be the one be always at the edge of the family. I know what it feels like for everybody around me to meet their mate but not me.“

The words slipped out before he could stop them. The pain he had buried so deep, deep down flaring up. The pain and loneliness and bitter realization that would never have what everyone else had.

He realized only then how much they really had in common. How similar they were. 

“I know what it feels like to be the afterthought,” he continued, unable to stop now. “I know how it feels to be shoved aside. I know how it feels to watch everyone around me find someone while I’m the one left behind.“ 

He took a step closer to where she was sitting, towering over her. “And I know how it feels to hate myself enough to deny myself the basic needs I actually have.“ 

The last words made her flinch. He was so close he could almost see the pain and guilt and bitter realization flit across her face. Her eyes were on her lap, her fingers wrapped around the edge of the table. 

“I know what it feels like to feel as if I don’t deserve to eat,” he said quietly. “Because I’m not good enough. Not worthy enough. Not deserving enough.“

He knelt down in front of her, forcing her to look at him. To meet his eyes. 

She tried to look away, but he wouldn’t let her. He wanted her to see. To understand that she wasn’t as alone as she thought. “I know what it feels like to punish myself by not giving myself what I actually need,” he said quietly. 

Her breath hitched at the last words, her eyes widening ever so slightly. She was listening. Really listening to what he said.

“You’re not the only one who hates yourself, you know,” he said quietly. The look in her eyes shattered him. The look of realisation. Of bitter understanding. The realization that they were so much more similar than either of them had thought before.

Zahra bit her lip, the guilt flashing across her face. Her hands started trembling, ever so slightly.

“You don’t deserve to go hungry,” he said quietly, his voice firm and quiet. “You don’t deserve to starve yourself. You don’t deserve to live in this… hovel.

“The cauldron should just have killed me,” Zara said her voice brittle. “I don’t like this life.”

And didn’t that break his fucking heart? 

She laughed bitterly, but there was no humour in it. “I’m not even surviving,” she said, a bitter smile on her thin lips. “I’m existing. There is a difference.“ 

The words hit him hard. She was right. She didn’t survive, she just existed. There was a difference and a huge one at that. “Then stop just existing,” he said quietly.

His hand was still cupping her cheek, his thumb stroking gently over her skin. 

“Says the guy that just keeps moping around,” she quipped.

It was a low blow but also true. Azriel’s jaw tensed at the comment. “I don’t mope,” he bit. “I just..“

He didn’t really have a good argument in his defence at the moment. 

He sighed. “We should both stop rotting away,” he said drily.

“Yeah, well, that’s easy to you to say,” Zahra said and he could hear the bitterness in her voice. 

“Eat your cheese,” he responded.

She rolled her eyes and snatched away the slice of cheese off the table. “Happy now?“ she muttered. 

“Delighted,” he gave back drily, as he moved towards her fireplace.

“You don’t need to do that,” Zahra said quietly. “I can do that.”

“Considering you’ve been too starved to think straight, you are going to let me do this,” Azriel cut across her calmly. “You are more than likely to burn yourself.” 

“Don’t the flames bother you?” She asked him quietly. He froze.

Nobody else had ever asked him. They had just expected him to be over it by now. He had 500 years to be over it. His hands clenched.

“Yes,” he answered quietly. “They still do.” It was the honest truth. A truth he never told anyone before, least of all someone like her. The shadows curled around his shoulders and arms as if to calm him down. The flames still bothered him. They always would. “But I learnt to deal with it a long time ago,” he continued.

“That’s not fair to you,” Zahra said, her voice quiet. “You are always the one in discomfort. And nobody cares.”

Her words hit him square in the gut. It was true. It was painfully true. He was always the one being uncomfortable. Always the one on edge. It had always been expected of him to be over it by now, the pain and the hurt. The fear and the bitterness. 

He finished building the fire. Using a match to light it carefully, then closing the door quickly.

“I can deal with it,” he answered quietly. “You should go to sleep,” he advised her.

“So should you,” Zahra told him just as quietly. “You look terrible.“ He knew he looked like crap. But that didn’t matter. 

“I’m fine,” he muttered, brushing off her comment. Even though he knew it was a lie. Even though he knew they were both terrible at taking care of themselves. 

“You are a terrible liar,” she quipped. He looked at her and was surprised to see a tiny smile on her face. 

“And you’re a very stubborn, very stupid, very annoying woman,” he quipped back just as quietly. 

The smile on her face broadened the tiniest bit at the comment. “I could say the same about you,” she shot back. 

“Sleep,” he told her again.

And then he left that little cottage to get back to the House of Wind. He didn’t bother winnowing, instead, he shot up into the sky with one flap of his mighty wings. He wouldn’t be able to sleep anyway.

His mind was whirling as he flew back to the House of Wind. So much had happened in the last few hours and it was all still a lot to process.

He had always been good at keeping a rein on his thoughts and his emotions. But this time, he simply couldn’t. 

Zahra and him, always on the outskirts of their family. Ignored and expected to get on with it.

They were so similar in so many ways. It was shocking to realize just how much they actually had in common.

The loneliness and solitude he had come to live with, she had experienced herself. The pain and the bitterness, he could recognize it on her, for he had felt it himself. 

Where are you, Az? Rhys demanded at that moment mentally. Azriel would like to scratch out his eyes, but he didn’t.

I’m flying back to the House, he sent back curtly. Zahra had a headache, so I brought her home.

A headache, Rhys shot back incredulously. Azriel could almost see the look on his High Lord’s face. You really think I will buy that?

I don’t care if you believe me or not, Azriel responded icily, his temper rising already at the tone. It is the truth and I really don’t wish to have a discussion over it.

There was a pause in Rhys’ mind. Then a slight huff. You can be so unbelievably stubborn sometimes, you know that?

Azriel didn’t bother reacting to that.

Elain and Lucien are figuring things out. So keep away from her, Rhys told him sharply.

I am keeping away from her, Azriel shot back, irritation flaring. You really think I will go and ruin this for her?

I don’t know what you are up to, Rhys retorted, and Azriel knew the High Lord was irritated. But I really don’t have the time to deal with your crap right now. That’s an order.

Understood, High Lord, Azriel snarled back and he felt Rhys chuckle in his mind at the tone. I will keep away from your precious Elain, I promise. 

Damn right you will, he heard Rhys mutter in his mind and the mental connection between the two of them snapped close. 

Azriel snarled in irritation as he landed on his balcony and stalked into his room. It wasn’t enough that he was wrestling with his own emotions, No, he also had Rhys all up his ass about it. 

And he was infuriated about the whole thing.

Nobody will suddenly show up and care, he has told Zahra. It was the truth. Nobody would care.

They only cared as long as they got what they wanted from him.

Chip away the pieces they didn’t like. Mould him into a person they could stomach. 

Either it was Rhys ordering to keep away from Elain…or ordering him to behave around Mor and Emerie… and to be quite honest…Azriel was done.

It was always him that needed to bend to make everybody else comfortable. Nobody bends for him.

So many years of following orders, of keeping his mouth shut, of bottling up the anger.

Even when everyone around him was getting what they wanted. They got their happily ever after. And he was left behind.  Not once did someone ever realize that he was struggling. Not once did someone notice that he needed something…anything. That he was hurting and in pain. Nobody even bothered to check on him, to ask how he was doing. 

They all got what they wanted. Mor, Emerie, even Feyre. They all got the mate that they wanted. Rhys, Cassian and even Amren had Varian. 

He was the one always helping everyone else. Always the one having to endure everything. Never anything for himself. No love for himself.

Orders, commands, demands…that’s all it ever was. He didn’t get a say in anything. They just expected him to be fine. And if he wasn’t…he had to push through it. 

He was the tool that did whatever needed to be done. The spy that got the order to do the dirty work. The shadowsinger that just had to endure everything. 

All for scraps of attention.

Azriel was done.

He was so done. With everything. With everyone. With the one-sided affection that he had given in a desperate attempt to feel…something, anything…. 

He needed to stop expecting to get anything from them.

Zahra did not. She seemed to have given that up a very long time ago

The cold realization that they had been doing the same to her hit him. She was also the tool they used when they needed it. She may not be a spy, but they used her just the same. Expected her to be fine. 

She was alone just as much as he was. 

Alone and isolated, an afterthought to their family just as much as he was. 

***

It was quiet in the little cottage. 

Peaceful. 

Comfortable.

Sie should be happy. Or at the very least…she should be content, should she not?.

Zahra had a roof over her head. And if she wanted to…she could afford food.

Her job didn’t pay that well, but it wouldn’t leave her starving. She just wasn’t hungry. She seemingly never was.

That was a lie and she knew it. Deep down she was hungry all the time. She just refused to give in to eating. She refused to listen to her body screaming for sustenance. It didn’t matter, anyway. Nobody cared.

She didn’t care.

Something inside her had broken during her bath in that cauldron. Her humanity had burned away and with that…with that everything Zahra had ever wanted.

She didn’t crave anything anymore. Not love. Not affection. Not attention. Not food. It was all gone. All she felt was numb. 

Cold, empty and numb. Like her shell had hardened and frozen over.

She had never thought it was possible to feel so damn tired without having done anything. 

Zahra forced herself to get up. Forced herself to heat some water on the stove… to make tea. The cheapest tea she had been able to find at the market.

It wasn’t the best. The taste was bitter and the color was more brown than black. But it was tea and she was thirsty enough to drink it.

It wasn’t very warm and left a bitter aftertaste on the tongue. Like her life itself. 

Maybe just dying would have been easier, she reflected bitterly. Was this how eternity would feel? Alone? Tucked away in this cottage? 

All her sisters had been given a mating bond. They had been given another person who loved them unconditionally…that was at their side. That wanted them around. That wanted to spent time with them. 

And then there was her. 

She had been closest to Feyre during the years in that cottage. Nesta gave her the fault for seemingly everything htat had ever gone wrong in her life, though Zahra privately thought that for Nesta, Zahra was just the evidence of another of her father’s failings…Elain…well, Elain was more embarrassed than anything about Zahra’s very existence. But Feyre…well, Feyre hadn’t cared. And so Zahra had tried to dote on her as much as she could. 

And then clearly she had been replaced in Feyre’s affections. 

She didn’t fault her for that. 

Feyre had made her own life. And she had every right to do that. She was busy with her mate and her son and Mor was her best friend and…there was seemingly no place for Zahra there. 

Which was fine. 

It was. 

But if Zahra was completely honest with herself…she was unspeakably jealous of the mating bond of every single one of her sisters. 

Of that promise of at least one person that would be on her side, come Hel or High Water. 

Clearly, something was wrong with her that she hadn’t been given a Mating Bond.

She wasn’t worth a mate. Clearly, something was broken inside her. Otherwise, the cauldron would have given her a mate, right? 

Maybe she was broken so thoroughly that nobody even wanted her. 

Why would they? She was a shell of a person, a ghost of the woman she was supposed to be.

She was cold, empty and numb. Everything that nobody could possibly want. 

Everyone else got a mate, love and happiness. Not her.

She had nothing.

Her hands clenched around her lukewarm cup of tea. 

Some random sparks of light sparked against the mug. A gift from the cauldron. They didn’t seem to do anything but warm whatever they touched. Maybe that was that random power the cauldron had given her. Neither future or death…but…warmth. She supposed it was something.

She wasn’t quite sure what to do with it, and she had never bothered telling anybody about it. 

Sometimes she allowed herself to play with them when she couldn’t sleep. They were strange and utterly useless. 

It wasn’t the power of foresight or the power of a death god…no. She had the stupid power to create sparks. Useless sparks of light. 

Oh well. 

Complaining about her sparks wasn’t going to help her either. 

So she pulled out her work and sat down to do her work as the sun came up and the day went on. 

Zahra balanced the account ledgers for one of the apothecaries in Velaris. Which meant she had a whole box of receipts to sort through and put into said ledger.

One receipt at a time, one name after the other. 

It kept her busy. It paid well enough. She seemed to have some kind of aptitude for it…maybe the fact that her father was a merchant had come through for once. 

She worked until the late evening. Until her eyes couldn’t concentrate on the numbers anymore.Until her back and shoulders ached with pain. She stretched her shoulders back. 

She wondered if she should eat something. Her cheese was gone, thanks to Azriel standing over her until she ate it…but she still had one or two slices of bread, didn’t she? 

She could go food shopping…buy another bread, another chunk of cheese tomorrow. 

Then Zahra heard a knock on the door. 

Confusion spread through her. Who would knock on her door at that very late hour? It was after 9 pm already. 

She got up, walked towards the door and opened it carefully.

It was the last person she would expected to be standing on the front porch. Azriel. 

“I am making you dinner.“

Her eyes widened at that announcement. “You are what?” she asked him dumbly. 

He just gave her a deadpan look and pushed past her. “I am cooking dinner because I am assuming that you haven’t eaten yet,” he told her plainly. 

It was true. Zahra hadn’t eaten a proper meal in god knows how long. But why did he care?? “Why?” she blurted out. “Why do you care if I’ve eaten?” 

He gave her a sharp look and pushed her towards the kitchen chair. “Sit down,” he simply ordered and she was too taken aback to protest against it. 

He had brought his own ingredients. His own knives, all tucked away in a little basket that he put on her countertop. “Can you peel potatoes?” He asked her as he rummaged through it. 

She could just stare at him. 

“Who do you think cooked the meat Feyre hunted?” Zahra replied drily.

Azriel froze in the process of digging something out of the basket on the counter. “You can cook?” he asked her and she heard the surprise in his voice. 

Zahra let out a snort. “Yes, I can cook,” she retorted. “What did you think I was doing this whole time in the cottage? Twiddling my thumbs?” 

He shrugged. “Honestly, I had no idea what you were up to,” he told her truthfully.  “I thought you were as useless as Elain and Nesta were at that point,” he admitted.

“Nesta did all the cleaning and hacked the wook,” Zara corrected him quietly. “Elain mended. I cooked. Feyre was the only one who hunted. And yes, we should have done more, but I did help run the household. The only one who never helped was our father.” The bitterness bled into her voice at that. 

There was a long pause after her admission. Then Azriel exhaled. “I guess I shouldn’t be as surprised as I am,” he muttered. “You don’t strike me as a pampered useless damsel.” 

“Thank you for that assessment, Shadowsinger,” she quipped back. “I will make sure to remember it when I need a pick-me-up.” 

He put a sack of potatoes in front of her. “I take it I’m peeling potatoes,” Zahra murmured, staring at the sack that was in front of her.

“Yes,” Azriel confirmed in that no-nonsense voice of his. “While I prep the meat. I do hope you like rabbit,” he added drily.

“Oh good,” she muttered, grabbing a knife and started to peel away at the potatoes. “Did you hunt it?”

“Yes,” he confirmed, his voice neutral. Zahra bit back a snarky remark and focused on the potatoes. 

They worked like that in silence. Him preparing the meat, her peeling the potatoes and the carrots.

It was odd. This whole thing was odd. Sitting and cooking with Azriel. She hadn’t even known he could cook. 

And yet…it was comfortable. Like the silence wasn’t awkward and neither of them felt the need to break it. It was a comfortable domestic kind of silence. Like they had done this a thousand times before. 

“How are you with spicy food?” Azriel asked her after he had taken the potatoes from her. 

Zahra blinked in surprise. “I have a pretty good tolerance, why?” she asked, curious. 

“All the food I can cook is Illyrian,” Azriel answered drily. “I learned from Rhys’ mother and later from my own. It’s spicy.”

“I can handle a bit of spice,” she assured him. “It should be fine.” He nodded in response. 

The sound of the fire crackling in the stove and him stirring up the meat were the only sounds filling the kitchen as they continued their work. 

Zahra honestly had no idea Azriel could cook. He didn’t seem like the type of male who spent time cooped up in the kitchen, making meals. It was a little surprising. 

And yet, the scents of spices and rabbit were filling her kitchen right now... It smelled almost heavenly. 

She hadn’t smelled something as heavenly in a long time. And her stomach growled in response to the delicious scents of food. Zahra tried to remember when she’d last eaten something actually decent, but she couldn’t think straight. The food was distracting her.

“You look half starved,” Azriel observed in a deadpanned tone and she snapped her head up only to find him looking at her. 

His eyes were focused on her, a frown playing on his forehead. “When was the last time you actually ate something properly?” he asked her, his voice firm. 

She averted her gaze. “I don’t know,” she muttered, looking away from him and to the pot bubbling on the stove. “Maybe a week ago?” 

He was silent for a moment. “That long?” he asked her, his voice carefully neutral. She just shrugged in response to keep herself from admitting that she actually couldn’t remember exactly. 

He poured hot, thick stew into a bowl for her and then put it in front of her, holding out cutlery for her to take. “Why are you doing this?” Zahra asked him weakly.

“Because I wish somehow had done it for me,” Azriel responded

That simple statement made her blink in surprise. It was not an answer she had been expecting. She bit her lip, not really sure what to say. 

And then he simply said. “Eat. You look like you’d blow away at the slightest breeze.”

She should have been angered by that blunt statement, but somehow she wasn’t. 

So Zahra ate.

The food tasted incredibly good. She had to admit that the Shadowsinger was talented with cooking. The food was spiced just perfectly, hot and filled with flavour. 

Every bite made her realize just how incredibly hungry she was. Her stomach filled slowly and the hunger abated with every spoonful. It was like her insides started to come back to life. The numbness was slowly disappearing, replaced by an odd sort of warmth flowing through her limbs. 

"Thank you," she finally said weakly.

Azriel just nodded at her, watching her eat. “Of course,” he murmured and continued with his own food. 

[f0point5]

I think I have sent this same request some time ago but I still would like you to write something about Emilia and Max hanging out with Victoria’s children and maybe thinking about their own future kids. But really anything with Max and Emilia would be great!

I don’t think I’ve ever seen this one, but tumblr eats asks sometimes 🤷‍♀️ but it’s too cute so here you go! I am keeping these short but I hope you still enjoy it!

✨Set during summer break 2024✨

I’m having his baby (…) no, I’m not

You take a sip of your rosé as Victoria comes to stand beside you. You’re lurking in the doorway of the lounge, watching Max sitting on the couch with his baby niece in his arms. He’s bobbing her in a gentle motion, his hands looking huge around her tiny, swaddled body.

“God, I remember when we used to say our kids would get married,” Vic says beside you, and you laugh.

You did say that. As little kids you would wish to be sisters, and somehow the only way you could think to make that happen would be for your children to marry each other. Like in that Flintstones movie you used to love. You’d draw pictures of the two of you sitting on the porch of a large house, watching your children get married.

Now you wonder if your mums thought the same, during those summers in Italy, as they watched you all play. They swear now that they did, that the mother’s intuition told them you and Max were tied together by some invisible chord that chafed on both your wrists. “A mother always knows,” Sophie said to you when she saw you last, “you will know, too”.

“And now that would be illegal and dangerous for our grandkids,” you say, shaking your head. “Crazy,”

“I like it better this way,” Victoria says, putting her arm around your shoulder and squeezing you into a hug.

“Me, too,” you agree, your eyes fixed on Max and Hailey. He’s whispering to her in Dutch, her eyes fluttering closed every few seconds as she yawns in his face, which only makes him smile. He’s utterly mesmerised by her. And you’re mesmerised by him.

I swear I can actually feel my ovaries right now.

“He’s so good with kids,” Vic says. “Even with Jaye I remember he was so gentle,”

“Yeah,” you agree, only half hearing her as you take another sip.

“Gives you baby fever, huh?”

You choke on your wine. Was that Victoria or your subconscious talking?

Vic, are you in here? No, of course she’s not in here. She’s just being nosey. Act natural.

“Are you okay?” Max asks from the couch. You look over at him as you wipe your mouth, coughing once as you nod. Even as he looks at you in concern, he never stops the gentle bouncing motion of the baby in his arms.

You go to answer, but Vic beats you to it, blunt as ever. “I was just saying, you will be having one of your own soon, yeah?” She smiles, nodding at Hailey.

If Max is panicking as much as you, he doesn’t show it, just shrugging. “I mean, ye-“ You can feel your eyes widen, and he stops when he sees your face. He tries again. “May-“ he frowns at you, silently begging for help. “No?” You nod gently, and Max turns to Victoria. “No.”

She looks at you in mild disbelief. “No?”

“No,” you emphasise to both Verstappens.

You love them dearly but genetics are a crazy thing - they both share a chronic disregard for timing. They want it all, and they want it now, in any order, all order be damned.

“You’re not getting any younger,” Victoria says, nudging you.

“That is just rude,” you tell her, and she just smiles unapologetically.

“Oh, come on,” she implores, reaching up to wind her finger around a lock of your hair, “a little baby with Max’s eyes and your hair?”

“And both of our tempers,” you say with a chuckle. “Can you imagine that? Besides, we can barely make cereal, and you want us to raise a baby?”

You look at Max for support, but he’s no longer paying attention. He’s looking down at his niece like he’s holding water.

Maybe a baby can live on cereal, if her dad looks at her like that.

“I’m going to go put Hailey down for her nap,” Vic says, jerking you from your thoughts.

She goes over to take a sleepy Hailey from Max’s arms, and he looks loathe to let her go. She looks so much bigger when held by her mother, and her so much more fragile.

“When I get back, we can start on dinner. I’m going to make cereal,” Vic teases in a whisper, winking at you as she passes.

Max snorts with laughter, and you shoot Vic a glare as she starts to hum, shuffling her way out of the lounge towards the bedroom.

You join Max on the couch, falling onto it beside him with a heavy sigh.

“So glad I’m an only child,” you say, rolling your eyes. When Max doesn’t respond, you glance over at him to find him staring at his hands. You nudge him gently. “What?”

“You do,” he starts, leaning back as he turns to you. “Want kids, someday, don’t you?With me. I mean…you don’t think I’ll be, like…”

“No,” you answer quickly, when you understand what he’s getting at.

You silently curse yourself for that joke about tempers. For ever making him think that’s something you worry about. You know there’s a heaviness in Max, in both of you. You know that he is so much more than his father’s son. But you also know that the weight on his shoulders will keep him crooked until he can see that for himself. You hope knowing you see it will be enough for now.

“I want your baby, Max. Someday. There’s no one else I would ever do this with besides you and not just because I love you, but because I know you’ll be an amazing dad,” you tell him honestly, and even that small platitude seems to relax his shoulders. “But can we at least get to one year of baby making activities before we start painting a nursery?”

Max nods, letting out a husk of a laugh. “I’m shit at painting anyway,” he says, looking at you from under those eyelashes that you secretly envy.

Maybe she’ll inherit those, too.

“Free practice?” You offer with a smirk, holding your hand for his.

Max looks at your outstretched palm for a moment before taking your hand in his. “Free practice,” he agrees, using his grip on your hand to pull you forward so that your chest is pressed against his. “I’m looking forward to FP2 later,”

[ashipiko]

1k+ days of yume….. w this guy of all people……….? 😔

rambles + no text ver below cut ↓↓↓

OK WELL TECHNICALLY IT ISNT JUST 1K DAYS IT’S. checks notes. the 1358th day of insanity! i’ve lost count atm honestly it’s so bad. why am I still here. 😭😭😭😭

funnily enough this is posting the day AFTER i post ace’s bday art which is so funny? WHEN I FOUND OUT THE 1000TH DAY (of me jokingly marrying ace on discord 😔) WAS ON THE 24TH I WAS LIKE BRROOO I SO GOTTA DO SMTH FOR THIS. THATS SO FUNNIES. and so here we are

THIS PIECE WAS REALLY FUN TO DO THO ILL BE FR. decided to go w ghost marriage because it’s a throwback to my fave event + Ace’s first event + Ashi’s first event outfit AND fully fleshed out event + the whole marriage concept AND LIKE. I DUNNO!!!! it’s such a classic and I think that it encapsulates the ashace vibe so well <3 I WUV THEM………. happy w how the whole thing came out……… it sure does feel worthy of like what. 4+ years now???? SIGH.

🫶 well anyway. thanks ace trappola i GUESS for unfortunately being my fave ginger guy EVER and my second fave guy ever. cheers to yume <333 and sankyu for all my followers who followed me on part of this horrid journey as well!!!!!!

[dekusdante]

Things that annoys me in the Jujutsu Kaisen Fandom

Sorry but this is going to be all over the place.

Am I the only one tired of the same trope being used when it comes to Gojo from JJK? In other words the enemies to lovers trope where the oc or reader is basically Utahime with out the name.

Like we all remember the episode where he gave out what type of person he was into which was a nice girl or something along those lines. I that as writers you have to take creative liberties but why are all the readers in these stories are exactly the same.

They either hate Gojo or is super easily annoyed at him. Jerks but its okay cause for some reason he loves them unconditionally. This is so annoying cause there is no push back from Gojo in these stories. Just him taking back the reader or waiting for them to return his feelings when in actuality he shouldn't.

Another thing that annoys me is why is it always the guy that's simping why can't it ever be the woman being madly in love and trying to win him over?

This enemies to lover trope has completely taken over the Reader x Gojo fandom and its so overused. Now I will admit there are some gems out there, but I just don't even bother reading anything that is enemies to lovers anymore. I'm just tired of reading the same thing over and over again with the same copy and paste formula/reader.

Also why is smut so strong on here. Like don't get me wrong those writers are killing it with the plot aspect but man does all the smut kill me. Like I want more plot these are really good and creative ideas but man the smut kills me lol. Still reading the plot but stop at the smut parts which is usually the end so we gucci.

Hmm, another trope I refuse to read in these are arranged marriage were we are supposed to be upset with the guy who is forced to marry someone they don't want too. Why? Well for starters it always start with the reader being mistreated by the guy for some reason and the reader putting up with it until something happens and the guy falls in love with them and has to gain both their trust and love again.

I can get behind this but they always make the guy so unredeemable in these that it would be crazy if she takes him back. [She always does] Another thing is we are supposed to hate the guy because he wants to remain faithful to the person he was with before the arrange marriage. Like why are we bashing a faithful man?

Another trope I hate is when the guy is always in the wrong. A while ago I read a Gojo x reader fic were reader was mad that Gojo couldn't spend a lot of time with her so she broke up. Okay valid even though I am sure this would have been addressed before or earlier in the relationship but okay. What annoyed me with this story is that she then goes on to get in a relationship with Nanami who then calls Gojo an idiot for losing a woman like her.

I could not believe what I read. Like what the hell did Gojo do? At this point Gege posted about Gojo's life and how the man is booked to the max and I couldn't help but think how distasteful it was to first make it appear as if Nanami would do something like that to Gojo and secondly pretend that they don't have more free time compared to him. Like Nanami even understood why Geto did what he did.

Anyway that's all I got for now. I am not here to argue but I would love to hear about what you think on this. A second opinion is always welcomed and if you have a trope you don't like then I would love to hear it.

Also if you have a story that you would like to promo then please do so in the comments. It is a okay if you want too. No pressure,

[gingiesworld]

Queen Of My Heart

Wanda Maximoff x GN! Reader

Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Bittersweet Ending, Arranged Marriage. Death

18+ MINORS DNI

Word Count: 3.8K+

Taglist : @mothertoall2 @natashamaximoff-69 @canvascoloredin @wizardofstories @louxbloom @wandanats-goodgirl @the-ox-fan20 @ladyqueenxoxo @aemilia19 @wandaromamoff69 @mfd-101 @dorabledewdroop @marvelogic @dopeyouth @karsonromanoff @reginassweetheart @machyishere @gemz5 @pawiie @duckiekong (If you want to be added to my taglist, please DM me or comment)

Wanda Maximoff was everyone’s dream girl, the woman who had the most beautiful eyes, a smile that could brighten even the darkest of days, and a kind heart. Every man wanted her to be their wife, leaving many suitors to keep approaching her father about her hand in marriage.

“There’s another one.” Pietro groaned as he joined Wanda behind the counter of the Apothecary that their parents had owned.

“Why can’t they all just leave me be.” Wanda sighed as Pietro shrugged. “I don’t want to be with any of them, and it’s stupid to think that asking father would help them.”

“I’m sorry, Wanda, but that’s just how it is. No one truly marries for love, they never have.” Pietro told her.

“But that is what I want, I want a partner who makes me smile so effortlessly, I want a connection that isn’t forced, it just flows naturally.” She told him as she organised some of the jars on the shelf, dusting them as she went along. “I want to be with someone who I see a future with, not just for financial gains. Someone who wouldn’t care what we had or didn’t have, I just want that type of love that makes everything in the world seem so superfluous.”

“You mean what you have with Y/N?” He questioned, earning a slap on the arm.

“Shush. Father can’t find out.” Wanda whispered. “He will kill both of us, but yes. I just want to be able to live with them on some farm and grow old with them.”

“Wanda, your mother needs your help in the kitchen.” Mr Maximoff approached the twins, a smile on his face. “We have guests coming over tonight, and a possible suitor for you.”

“Father, I don’t.” Wanda tried only to get cut off by him.

“I don’t care if you want this or not. This is what’s best for this family and your future family.” He told her firmly. “You need to learn to remember your place.” He told her before he left the shop.

“I guess this is it.” Wanda sighed as she gave Pietro the rag. “My life and dreams are officially over.”

“They aren’t.” Pietro tried as Wanda just shook her head before she disappeared towards the kitchen to help her mother.

“I’ve already laid out your best dress.” Mrs Maximoff beamed as she prepared the dough for her bread. “This is so exhilarating, you’re going to be a wife.”

“I don’t want to be a wife.” Wanda told her honestly. “Besides, I don’t know this man either.”

“I didn’t know your father, but I can’t say that I was against marrying him when he asked your grandparents.” Her mother spoke. “But, I can say that over the time I have spent with him, I learned to love him and we then had you and your brother.”

“I don’t want to learn to love. I want it to be natural, just feel it without even spending an unknown amount of uncomfortable time with someone who is only going to help keep father’s business afloat.” Wanda told her honestly.

“There isn’t a choice in this Wanda.” Mrs Maximoff spoke angrily. “You are a woman, this is your womanly duty to provide for a husband and build a family with him.” Wanda sighed and gave up fighting against her mother, knowing she won’t exactly see the situation as Wanda does.

The night soon fell, the Starks were a well respected family in the Westview, Mr and Mrs Stark had two children, Jarvis and Morgan Stark. Given there is a significant age gap between the two siblings, they both remained close. Jarvis being the protective older brother that his sister needed.

“Are you nervous, son?” Mr Stark asked as the carriage came to a stop before the Scarlet Apothecary.

“I am father.” He answered truthfully, having seen Wanda everyday since they were children, falling for her every time he saw her or heard her voice. He loved the sound of her laugh, although he hated that he was never the one who made her laugh. That only fueled his deep hatred for Y/N Rogers, the only one who has ever truly been extremely close to Wanda. Everyone in Westview saw both Wanda and Y/N as best friends, even one of the neighbors would joke saying that the two of them would fall in love and wed.

“It is going to be fine.” Mrs Stark reassured him, making him smile as they all left the carriage, the two gentlemen helping the ladies down the steps. “She would be stupid not to see such a fine man.”

As they approached Maximoff's residence, Wanda was too busy pacing her bedroom, soon moving as fast as she could when she heard her window open, locking her door before she saw Y/N climb inside.

“You know, you could always tell me you don’t need me anymore.” They smirked as Wanda sighed. “We had a date, and you never came and I got worried.” They told her truthfully.

“I’m sorry Y/N/N, but my father.” She tried before her eyes started to fill with tears. “He’s trying to marry me off to someone.”

“He can’t do that.” Y/N stepped closer to her, their arms soon wrapping around her, pulling her into their strong embrace. “That’s not.”

“He can do that.” Wanda sniffled. “It’s not like women have similar rights to men.”

“Well, you should.” They told her firmly. “Everyone is allowed to have the freedom of choice. It shouldn’t matter depending on your gender.”

“I just.” Wanda tried as Y/N ran their fingers through her brown locks.

“I will be here when you’re finished and I can hold you until you fall asleep.” They told her softly.

“But, what about your father?” She asked them, they just shrugged.

“I’m only going to be missing another talk on why I need to uphold the family name and join the military.” They told her, they gently kissed the top of her head before she left the room. As she approached the dining room, she could hear the voices of her father, Pietro and two other men, all of them laughing as the smell of whiskey and tobacco filled the air.

“Here she is.” Mr Maximoff beamed as she stood awkwardly in the doorway. “Wanda, dear, come on in and introduce yourself.”

“Hello.” She spoke quietly, doing a small curtsy before she caught sight of her twin's grin as he tried to hold in his laugh.

“It’s so nice to meet you, Wanda.” Mr Stark spoke as he took her hand in his, pressing a kiss upon her knuckles, she had to try to hide the uncomfortable feeling she had in the pit of her stomach. “Jarvis here has told his mother and myself an awful lot about you.”

“Jarvis?” She questioned as she looked at the tall man beside her twin. “I don’t think we have ever met, I’m sorry.”

“Wanda!” Mr Maximoff scolded her, causing her to flinch at the anger within his tone before Jarvis spoke up.

“It’s perfectly fine.” He told them both with a warm smile. “I know we have never uttered a single word to one another, but I have noticed you Wanda, I have noticed you everyday since you first moved here with your family.”

“Why have you never spoken to her?” Mr Stark questioned as Jarvis shrugged.

“Well, Y/N Rogers seems to always have her attention.” He answered as Mr Maximoff scoffed.

“I don’t care for that Rogers child.” He spoke bitterly. “They are just a military family, and soon enough Mr Rogers will have them shipped off into the next War and then who knows, we may never have to see them again.”

“Father.” Pietro stepped in, seeing how Mr Maximoff’s words had affected Wanda. “Y/N is an amazing friend and they have always been there for Wanda. Did you know they were also the one who had done all of my chores that time when I had broken my leg? I never asked them too, they noticed the amount of extra stress that you put on Wanda and they decided to help. They are always there for her when we are not.”

“Don’t you dare speak out of term to me, boy.” Mr Maximoff seethed as the sound of the slap had silenced the room. “You do not disrespect me in front of our guests, now get out of my sight.” With that, Pietro left the room in a hurry, holding his already bruising cheek.

“I’m going to check on my mother and dinner.” Wanda spoke quietly before she left the dining room. She had hoped that maybe some unfortunate circumstance would happen and they would cancel dinner, but just as she had entered the kitchen, her mother was already bringing out the food.

“We are going to feast like royalty tonight.” Mr Maximoff beamed as he took his seat at the head of the table, opposite Mr Stark. Everyone had soon settled in to take their seats, soon digging in and sharing small conversations.

“I know this may seem forward.” Jarvis spoke as he sat beside Wanda. “Would you like to accompany myself on a stroll through the park on Sunday, after church?”

“I don’t know, I have to help my mother with the shop.” Wanda tried as Mr Maximoff shook his head.

“I can help your mother, you should go on this date.” He told her sternly. “You may never find another fine young man like Jarvis again.” He turned to face Jarvis. “She will be there to accompany you, she will meet you at the park.”

“Thank you, sir.” Jarvis beamed, soon the rest of the evening passed by in a blur, Wanda soon finding herself helping her mother in the kitchen with the cleaning before they all had retired to their bedrooms.

“Hey.” Y/N whispered as Wanda entered her room. “How was it?” They asked as she sat on the edge of her bed after locking her door.

“Awful.” She sighed, running her hands over her face. “My father is all for it and what he said about you.” She stopped herself before she continued.

“I heard.” They told her. “Your father isn’t exactly tactful in trying to be silent about his distaste.”

“I’m sorry.” Wanda whispered as Y/N moved to sit beside her, wrapping their arms around her and pulling her into them.

“You have nothing to be sorry for, darling.” They told her, cupping her cheeks and wiping the tears that had threatened to fall. “I will always be here for you, however and whenever you need me.” Wanda looked into their eyes, seeing how the blue shone in the moonlight, she had always loved their eyes but seeing them in this lighting was something different, and she loved it. It was a sight she wanted to be able to see every night for the rest of her life. She soon leaned in and pressed her lips against theirs, their lips both moving in unison before she snapped back to reality.

“I’m so sorry.” She said as she moved away from them. “I didn’t.” She tried before Y/N cut her off, approaching her, taking her hands in theirs.

“It’s okay.” They gave her a soft smile. “Although, I have to be honest with you.” They sighed before continuing. “I have always wanted to kiss, I can’t quite recall in which moment I began to feel more for you, but I do.” Wanda shook her head in haste, pressing her fingers to their lips.

“Please don’t say it.” She whispered sadly. “As much as I want to hear you say it, I want it to feel amazing and in a moment that is special between the two of us, within a moment that solidifies that our union will be forever.” She moved her finger as she continued. “This isn’t that moment, if I hear you say those words I so desperately want to hear right now, it will shatter my already broken heart.”

“I’m sorry.” They told her before they stepped away from her slightly. “I uh, I should take my leave now.”

“Please stay.” Wanda pleaded as they moved towards her window. “I need you to hold me, just for tonight.” And that was indeed the start of the pair’s internal struggles. Y/N hated seeing Wanda accompanying Jarvis everywhere, ever since their stroll in the park, her father had urged her to go on more outings with her husband to be. She would even see as Y/N would pass her by in the street, her heart breaking little by little, just as theirs was breaking. Knowing that in this lifetime they will never have the life they had always dreamed about when they were just children.

“You can’t seriously think you can make a name for yourself with these knick knacks.” Mr Rogers scolded as he approached Y/N who was happily carving pieces for a new chess board.

“I don’t think that father.” They answered him. “This is merely something that brings me peace and tranquility.”

“I have arranged a meeting with my old Senior Officer.” He told them as he picked up a rook, looking at it between his fingers, a look of disdain on his face. “He will help with getting you set for joining the services.”

“I don’t.” Y/N told him, placing down their chisel and the King they were carving.

“I do not care what you do or don’t.” Mr Rogers seethed, throwing the rook far into the field before he gripped Y/N up to their feet by the scruff of their collar. “You have a family name to respect, we are a military family and you will follow the path that I have laid out for you.”

“Yes, sir.” Y/N spoke flatly, their eyes never leaving their father’s who then started to straighten out Y/N’s clothes.

“I will see you at supper.” He told them before he left, Y/N watching as he disappeared out of the field, not realizing that Wanda was approaching them.

“Y/N? Are you okay?” She questioned urgently as she approached them, watching as they soon turned to face her.

“I’m fine.” They grumbled as they sat back down in their spot, grabbing their tools to finish carving the King.

“I found this.” Wanda held out her hand, the rook in which Mr Rogers had just thrown.

“Thank you Wan.” They smiled at her, her own smile widening at the nickname she had missed so much. “How are things with Jarvis?” They asked her, an edge of bitterness in their tone.

“I don’t like him.” She told them honestly as she sat down beside them, watching as Y/N’s hands worked on the small wooden figurine. “I can see that he likes me, but I just, I don’t think I will ever like him in that way.”

“But, this is what your father wants for you and your family’s future.” Y/N reminded her as she just shook her head.

“My father only wants the financial benefactors that come with this arrangement, he couldn’t care less about the family.” Wanda told them, before she turned to watch their face as theY concentrated. “I just want to be able to be with the one person who I am truly in love with freely, without any judgment from my father.”

“And how do you suggest you do that?” Y/N questioned, their attention soon turning to her, their faces close as they could feel her breath on their lips.

“I don’t know.” Wanda whispered, her eyes flashing between both their eyes and their lips. That kiss they had both shared, never really left her mind since the night it happened. “I just, I know what I want, I know who I want but I just.”

“Have to live up to our parents' expectations of us.” Y/N finished for her, their faces had somehow moved closer, their noses brushing one another. “I understand that perfectly.” They whispered sadly. “I want nothing more than to be able to remain here, marry the one woman whom I have only ever seen within my future and start a family with her.”

“Then what’s stopping you?” Wanda questioned, not anticipating Y/N rising to their feet and stepping away from her, creating some distance.

“I think you know exactly what is stopping me.” They told her, Wanda soon followed suit and stood before them, taking a slow step closer.

“I want to hear it from you.” She told them firmly. “I want you to tell me.” She watched as Y/N closed their eyes, clenching their fists as they gathered themselves before they moved towards Wanda, faster than she had anticipated, she was pushed up against the tree.

“Because you are marrying another, and I’m clearly not worthy of such love nor a future with you.” They told her sadly, Wanda’s hand reaching up to cup their face. “It’s you, Wanda. It’s always been you.” They confessed, both of their hearts beating rapidly before Wanda soon pressed her lips against theirs, kissing them with such passion as Y/N pushed their body up against her own. Wanda moaned at the feeling of their tongue slipping through her parted lips, Y/N’s hand gripping the fabric of her dress, trying to steady themselves, trying to fight the urges they had. “We should stop.” Y/N whispered, after finding the strength to pull away. “This is wrong.”

“It doesn’t feel wrong.” Wanda whispered, Y/N’s head rested against hers as neither of them attempted to move away from the other. “This.” She held one of their hands in her own against her chest, allowing Y/N to feel how fast her heart was beating. “This is right, this is what it should be, but.”

“But you belong to another.” Y/N spoke sadly, their eyes glistening as they filled with tears.

“My heart is yours.” Wanda told them. “It doesn’t matter who I am with or wherever I am, my heart will always be yours. I’m just sorry that we couldn’t have the life we wanted in this lifetime.”

“I promise you that I will always find you in the lifetimes that shall follow this one.” Y/N told her confidently. “Maybe, in one of those lives, we will finally have our story written.”

“How can you be sure?” Wanda questioned, her eyes taking in Y/N’s for what she never knew would be the last time.

“My heart will beat as fast as it is now when it is in your presence.” They told her softly. “My heart will always know when it’s home. You are my home.” Wanda pressed a soft kiss to their lips before the two pulled away.

“But, what about now?” She asked them as they sighed.

“I want nothing more than to run away with you and start our story, but we both have our obligations here.” They reminded her. “You’re getting married, and Jarvis is a rather nice gentleman, he will look after you.”

“But, I want you.” Wanda tried, feeling disappointment as Y/N stepped away, feeling the loss of their warmth against her form.

“In the next life, we will have our happy ending.” They told her as they started to pick up their tools and chess carvings. “Besides, I have a family obligation I need to uphold.”

“Join the military and get yourself killed.” Wanda scoffed as Y/N sighed, observing Wanda as she wrapped her arms around herself, tears threatening to fall from her eyes.

“With every passing day we are dying, we are dying from the moment we were conceived.” Y/N told her. “It’s what we make of time we have that makes it count, and I can say that since the moment you came into my life, you made the sun shine brighter, the colours more vibrant than ever.” They continued before Wanda interrupted them.

“Don’t.” She spoke firmly, struggling to stop the emotions from falling through. “I am not going to say goodbye to you. I can’t ever say goodbye. Not to you.” She whispered as her tears slipped. “You aren’t leaving me. I won’t let you.” Y/N took a shaky breath before they approached her, only just within arms reach.

“We have to part ways, but I will always carry you in my heart.” They picked out the Queen and King in which they had carved. “You will always be the Queen of my heart. Always and forever.” They handed the small figurines to her, watching as she held them both close to her heart. “I will always remember you, Wanda and I will always hold you in my heart, until it stops beating.”

“I can’t.” She cried as Y/N pressed a lingering kiss to her head.

“You don’t have to say goodbye.” They told her softly. “Just promise me that you will continue to live your life, have a family of your own. I know Jarvis isn’t exactly the one you want to have a future with, but when you have your own children, that love you feel will be greater than any love story in history, because you will do anything for them, you will make sure they get to live the life they choose, they get to love whomever they fall in love with. Let them live the future neither of us had the chance to experience.” Wanda only nodded before she watched them leave, her sobs soon falling harder as they had disappeared. Wanda had never anticipated that that moment was the last moment she had ever shared with Y/N, especially on that night when they had returned home to find Mr Rogers drunk and hitting their mother. Y/N had jumped in to defend her, only to be beaten to death by their drunk father. Once the news had traveled about their death, Wanda had grieved for them, she had felt like her heart had been ripped from her chest, hoping that maybe if she had convinced them to sleep with her under the stars for one last time, they would still be here, but all she could do was honour their final wish they had had for her, to live her life and build a family of her own, giving her own children the opportunity of freedom, away from the family’s expectations. As much as she hated it, Y/N was right about Jarvis, he was a good man, a good husband and father to their children. It wasn’t exactly the life that she had envisioned for herself, but she was happy, she had built herself a family, taking away her own parents expectations of her own twins, allowing them to follow their dreams, something in which Wanda was never given the opportunity to do.

[genericpuff]

Wait, if Hera hated nymphs, does that mean she had beef with Poseidon's wife???

Who knows, but it does shed a whole new light on this scene from Episode 1:

Like, in the context of the scene, it's clear the point of this interaction is to highlight how "lonely" Hades is that he's the only one at the party without a date. Though I do think it's funny that Hades is frustrated / shocked at the revelation that Poseidon brought his wife to a party that she would presumably be invited to attend, like... of course Poseidon is here with his wife, that makes Amphitrite royalty by extension and so at the very least she'd likely be obligated to attend even if she, for some reason, didn't want to go.

So Hades being like "GOD you mean I'm the ONLY UNMARRIED GUY without a DATE???" like yeah man that's what it means to not be married LOL

But in hindsight, knowing what we know now about Hera being cruel to satyrs and nymphs who are canonically lower class (making it a double whammy of racism AND classism) that interaction of Hades asking Hera if Poseidon brought Amphitrite right after Hera called Minthe "nymph trash" almost feels like Hades calling her out, to which she responds sheepishly, "... Yes."

Again, I know that's not the intention of this scene, but it does come with deeper implications now that the series is over and we know that Hera has a history of racism and classism which largely goes unaddressed.

And those implications kind of read like this:

Hera: "I, for one, am grateful! I don't have to spend the evening with that nymph trash :)"

Hades: "Did Poseidon bring his (oceanid) wife?"

Hera: "(・_・;)... yes, okay, Poseidon brought his wife, Amphritite, but she's not nymph trash or anything, she's one of the good ones!"

Again though, just food for thought that's kinda messed up and kinda funny to think about on re-reads. There's so much classism and racism baked into LO even from the very beginning and it's wild that it wound up going unnoticed for years. Even I didn't really notice it as much as I ought to have when I first started reading. To anyone who's new to the series, LO does a good job at bombarding you with colors, characters, Greek myth references, and feel good fluff moments between H x P to distract you from the often biased and outdated viewpoints in its narrative.

TBH, none of that is to say that Rachel herself is some massive racist for writing a story like this, but I do think she didn't really spend enough time analyzing the works that clearly inspired her and/or challenging her own inspirations to ensure she wasn't continuing the cycle of casual racism. It's really easy to be blissfully aware of your own biases if you never learn to address them, especially when it comes to writing fantasy stories which we tend to "disconnect" from real life, never once realizing that the messages and undertones we might accidentally be sending are often still realities for many people in real life today. Fiction isn't real life, sure, but it can still perpetuate some really dog shit thought patterns and subconscious beliefs if left unchecked, which LO is frankly full of especially upon re-reads with a more critical eye when you're not as likely to get distracted or swept away by the pretty colors and whirlwind romance.

[calirph]

𝐅𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐘 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐌𝐄𝐃𝐈𝐄𝐕𝐀𝐋 𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐃 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐀𝐆𝐄 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐒.

all sentences were taken from various scenarios related to arranged marriages mostly in the historical, fantasy or medieval setting. you can use them as base for starters or change place, pronouns as you see fit.

1. Arranged Marriages:

"You’ll be wed to him by sunset, whether you like it or not. The banners are already being stitched."

"Your union will bring peace to the realms. That’s all that matters now."

"I don't know him, Father. How am I to trust a man I've never met?"

"This marriage is a treaty, not a love match. Smile and seal the fate of our kingdom."

"The King has decreed it, and his word is law. You will marry the lord from the north."

2. Civil Marriages:

"It’s been agreed that we will marry, but it doesn’t mean we have to care for one another."

"Our union will be one of duty, not affection. I expect you to know your role."

"There will be no grand feast. Let us sign the papers, exchange vows, and be done with it."

"Marriage is a bond of power, not of the heart. We shall be civil, nothing more."

"Our marriage may not be one of love, but it will be a prosperous one."

3. Animosity Marriages:

"You think this marriage will bring me to heel? You’ll find I am not so easily tamed."

"Marry you? I would sooner take a blade to the throat than suffer beside you."

"I hate you as much as you hate me, but if it secures the throne, I’ll say the vows."

"This is no marriage, it's a prison, and you're the jailer."

"Forced to marry my enemy? I'd rather fight him on the battlefield than share his bed."

4. Marriages of Convenience:

"We both know what this is—a transaction. I expect no less than what we agreed upon."

"Our marriage will benefit us both. We need not speak of love, only power."

"Convenience. That’s all it is. We’ll play our roles and nothing more."

"It may not be what either of us wanted, but it is what we both need."

"A marriage of convenience is still a marriage. We shall gain what we desire and go our separate ways."

5. Secret Marriages:

"No one must know of this union. We can’t afford to let our enemies find out."

"By dawn, we’ll be wed in secret, and none will suspect what we've done."

"The gods have witnessed our vows, but no one else must."

"This marriage must remain hidden until the time is right."

"Our love must be kept in shadows. We cannot risk the kingdom’s wrath."

1. Shock:

"You’re marrying who? Surely, this must be some jest."

"No, I refuse to believe it! They wouldn't force me into this!"

"They have announced our marriage without even consulting me?"

"You mean to tell me my life has been decided with a mere letter?"

"Marriage? To him? I would rather be banished."

2. Calm Acceptance:

"I knew this day would come. There is no use fighting it now."

"So, this is to be my fate? Very well, I shall prepare for the wedding."

"It seems the council has made their choice. I suppose I’ll have to make mine."

"I always knew I wouldn’t marry for love. I’ll wear the crown, if that is what they wish."

"The marriage has been decided? Then let us move forward."

3. Dread:

"This can’t be happening. How could they bind me to someone so cruel?"

"I cannot—will not—marry them. Not after everything they've done."

"Marriage? To him? He’ll ruin me. He’ll ruin everything."

"How could they arrange this without my consent? I can’t do this."

"They cannot force me into this union. I will find a way out."

4. Surprise:

"A marriage? But I wasn’t even aware there were negotiations!"

"Married? To him? I thought they would never agree to it."

"Well, that was… unexpected. When is the ceremony?"

"The marriage has been arranged? I didn’t think anyone would ever want to wed me."

"I hadn’t anticipated a proposal, much less a marriage contract. How long have they been planning this?"

5. Reluctant Acceptance:

"If this is what must be done to keep the peace, then so be it."

"I never wanted this, but I’ll do my duty for the sake of the realm."

"Marriage was never my choice, but I will fulfill my obligations."

"It seems I have no say in the matter. I’ll prepare for the wedding."

"This is not the life I wanted, but if it is what the kingdom demands, I will marry."

6. Demaning the Marriage:

"You will marry him, or you’ll have no place in this house any longer." "I demand you fulfill your duty and marry the prince. It is for the good of the realm." "Your father’s last wish was for you to marry. You will honor it." "You’ll marry me, or I’ll see you cast out of every noble house in this kingdom." "The treaty demands this marriage, and so do I. You will not defy the crown." "I expect you to stand beside him at the altar. There is no other option." "Your marriage to her is the only thing that can save this alliance. You will do as you’re told." "Marry him, or the war will continue. This is your chance to stop the bloodshed." "You’ve been betrothed since childhood. Now, it’s time to fulfill that promise." "I demand you take her hand in marriage, or you will lose everything." "Marry me, or your family’s lands will be forfeit to the crown." "You have no choice. This marriage will happen, with or without your blessing." "The fate of your house depends on this marriage. You will not refuse." "You’ll marry him, or your title will be stripped from you." "Marry her, or the crown will consider it an act of treason." "This marriage is not a request—it’s a command." "You owe it to the family to marry her. The survival of our name depends on it." "There will be no further debate. You will marry him." "The council has decided, and you will marry. There is no escaping this." "This marriage has been arranged, and you will see it through." "You will wed her, or your family’s debts will never be forgiven." "Marry him, or you’ll be cast out of every noble circle in this land." "The marriage is necessary for the alliance. You will go through with it." "You’ll marry, or the consequences will be dire for your entire family." "This marriage isn’t just for you. It’s for the realm. You will marry."

7. Refusing the Marriage.

"I refuse to marry him. You can send me to the gallows, but I won’t say the vows." "You may have my life, but you will never have my hand in marriage." "I will not marry her. Not today, not ever." "I will die before I am bound to a man I despise." "I refuse to be a pawn in this marriage game." "This marriage is a mistake, and I will not be a part of it." "I cannot marry him. My heart belongs to another." "I will not be forced into a marriage I did not choose." "The crown may demand it, but I will not be forced into this union." "I will not marry her, no matter the consequences." "I’ll run away before I let them marry me to him." "You can’t force me into this. I refuse to marry him!" "The answer is no. I will not marry someone I do not love." "I cannot and will not marry him. No one can make me." "I will not be sold into a marriage like a piece of livestock." "My answer is final—I will not marry her." "This is not the life I wanted, and I will not marry him." "No amount of persuasion will force me into this marriage." "I will not be tied to a man who sees me as nothing more than a prize." "I refuse to be part of this political game. I won’t marry her." "You can threaten me all you like, but I will not marry him." "I will not marry for duty. I will marry for love, or not at all." "The marriage contract is torn. I will not wed him." "No force on earth will make me stand before an altar with him." "I will not be bound by chains of a marriage I did not choose."

8. Accepting or Warming up to Marriage:

"Perhaps this marriage isn’t such a terrible idea after all. It could bring more than just peace." "I’ve had time to think, and maybe… just maybe, this could work." "I never thought I’d say this, but I’m beginning to see the value in our union." "At first, I resisted, but now… the idea of marriage doesn’t seem so unbearable." "It may not have been my choice, but I’m starting to understand why it has to be this way." "The more I think on it, the more I realize that this marriage might actually be good for both of us." "I can’t deny that there’s strength in unity. Perhaps marriage is the best path forward." "I didn’t expect to say this, but I’m willing to give this marriage a chance." "I’ve come to terms with it. This marriage could bring something more than I first imagined." "I’ve fought it for so long, but maybe… it’s time to accept my fate." "You know, I think we could make this marriage work, if we’re both willing." "Strange, isn’t it? How the idea of marriage once repelled me, but now… it feels like the right course." "I used to hate the thought of it, but now I see there might be a future in this marriage." "I’m starting to believe that we can find happiness in this arrangement, even if it wasn’t love at first." "At first, I feared this union, but now… now I think we could build something real." "It wasn’t my first choice, but I’ve realized we might find more than just duty in this marriage." "I never thought I’d come around to the idea, but this marriage could bring more than just titles and lands." "I’ve had my doubts, but perhaps we can make this more than just an alliance." "If we’re both committed to this marriage, I believe we could find peace—and maybe something more." "I once thought I’d be miserable, but now I see… perhaps there’s hope for us after all." "We might not have chosen each other, but I think there’s a way forward in this marriage." "I didn’t expect to ever feel this way, but I’m beginning to look forward to our wedding." "Maybe this marriage was meant to be. There’s potential for more here than either of us anticipated." "I used to dread the idea of being married, but with you… maybe it won’t be so bad." "It seems strange to say, but I’m actually beginning to warm to the idea of being your spouse."

9. The wedding night.

"So… this is it, then? Our wedding night. Are you as nervous as I am?" "I know we’re bound by duty, but tonight… let’s forget everything else and just be ourselves." "Do you think we’ll remember this night with fondness? Or as just another part of our duty?" "I won’t pretend this isn’t strange, but… we’ve made it this far. Let’s take the rest one step at a time." "You don’t need to worry. Tonight will be whatever we choose it to be." "This is the part of marriage no one really talks about, isn’t it?" "There’s no rush. We’ve just the night and the rest of our lives ahead of us." "Are you sure you're comfortable with this? We can go slow if that’s what you prefer." "I’ve waited for this moment for so long, but now that it’s here… I don’t know where to begin." "There’s no need for fear. We’re in this together now, for better or worse." "I know you didn’t choose this marriage, but tonight… I hope we can find some common ground." "I never thought I’d say this, but I’m actually looking forward to this part of the wedding." "This night doesn’t have to be perfect. Just… ours." "I’ve been told what’s expected of us, but I’d rather we create our own expectations." "We’re alone now. No court, no family, just us. What do you want tonight to be?" "You look… beautiful. I know this isn’t easy, but I want you to know I’m here for you." "We’ve gone through the ceremony. Now comes the real challenge, doesn’t it?" "I hope you don’t expect too much from me tonight. I’ve never done this before." "No one ever told me how awkward a wedding night might be. Shall we just talk for a while?" "Tonight is about more than just obligation. I want this to mean something for both of us." "I’m not sure what happens next, but I’d like to figure it out together." "It’s just you and me now. No expectations, no pressure—just us." "Shall we make this night one to remember for something other than just duty?" "I know this is part of the marriage, but… I want you to know you have a choice in how it goes." "We can take our time. This night is ours, and no one else’s."

[svt-luna]

ᡴꪫ ⋆ INSTAGRAM UPDATE ࣪ ! ˓ ౨ৎ ࣪˖ ─── 240925: Blue

╰ ౨ৎ LUNA-VERSE MASTERLIST ╰ ౨ৎ luna's instagram

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lunabae something blue 🩵

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babyjijiyeon MRS. YOON!!! HOW UNSERIOUS COULD YOU POSSIBLY FUCKING GET?!?

svtrighthere_ SHE IS ABSOLUTELY SICK IN THE HEAD 🙃

lulunana BSKSHUSHEHAH she cracks me up fr 😂

lunadaily she really just posted this literally MINUTES after we got that fucking confirmation!?!

esther17 FIVE LONG MOTHERFUCKING YEARS! THAT’S HOW LONG YA’LL BEEN TOGETHER?! AND YA’LL ENGANGED TOO!!? I SIMPLY CANNOT WITH THE TWO OF YOU!!!

nana_lulu17 they have managed to break the internet in the span of a few hours and both decided to post on Instagram as if they didn’t… that’s it couple behavior right there.

ddaddu just a few simple questions… FIVE YEARS?! ENGAGED SINCE FUCKING BERLIN!?! AND IS JEONGHAN ALREADY BALD?!?

baebybaeby the caption too I–

ashhhh17 and with that, ladies and gentlemen, Bae Jiyeon became THE military wife 🤭

lunas-closet you look amazing, my love 💕✨

gyugyu_m mom is officially marrying dad 🥹💖

jeongnadaily JEONGNA NATION WE HAVE FUCKING WON!! THIS MIGHT BE THE BEST PIECE OF NEWS I HAVE EVER FUCKING GOTTEN 🎉🎉🎉🎉

napipopeta_ the face card, the body, the outfit… she’s proving to you haters what jeonghan gets on a daily basis 🥵

↳ user24705531 honestly don’t know who I am more jealous of 🙃

↳ moonlightbaby I want to be their third 🤭

xo_xokissme_ the song choice as well 🫠

lunanova09 she knows what’s she’s doing, i mean that caption! you’re getting married to THE Yoon Jeonghan, we get it you won 😭

popipopipopipo Hannie cannot handle all of that 🥵 (I’m totally jealous of him rn)

↳ mimi17 Yoon Jeonghan is the only one who can handle all of that.

jxjforever pledis said they got engaged Sept 8, that’s Berlin… everything makes sense!! them being so smiley during their performance, fans seeing them holding hands in Berlin, LUNA’S FUCKING CAPTION ON HER BERLIN POST!!?

↳ svtforeverfan “berlin you’ll always be my yes, you have my heart always and forevermore, now more than ever 💎🤍” WE HAVE BEEN PLAYED! SHE TOLD US!!

↳ wooowonwoo “always be my yes” IT WAS RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF OUR EYES 😝

missbitch ARE YOU TELLING ME YOU AND HAN HAVE BEEN DATING FOR FIVE YEARS AND ARE RECENTLY ENGAGED BUT WE WON’T SEE YOU TWO TOGETHER FOR TWO FUCKING YEARS?!! I AM UNWELL.

sonogong17 can jeonghan fight?

↳ shadowmyshadow like a fist fight? No. He might poison you in your sleep and get away with it tho.

↳ hanniehaeee02 ^^^ this is so Yoon Jeonghan coded. Literally something he is capable of doing 🤣

ೃ⁀➷ comment or message me to be added to the tag list :)

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Taglist: @yeoberryx @minminghao @angie-x3 @jennwonwoo @k13endall @heeseungthel0ml @chisskaa @megumi2020 @yoonzzziino @lllucere @smh-anon @yveclipse @randomworker @bunnystrm @iamawkwardandshy @gratefulbunny1 @bmo-bri @syren-ash @megseungmin @multiplums @unlikelysublimekryptonite @night-storm7 @cookiearmy @seokqt @btskzfav @billboard-singer @junhuisworld @caturdayvibe @coralbatlampzonk @sof1eya @lyraea

[haru-dipthong]

My Utena Fansub Ep 1 (link & translation discussion)

There were a lot of important decisions to be made in the first episode, since much of it is re-used in later episodes. In this post, I'll discuss some of the translation choices I made around the fairy tale opening, and the use of 様 (sama).

王子様が呉れた指輪はやはりエンゲージリングだったのでしょうか。それは良いとして、お姫様は王子様に憧れるあまり、自分も王子様に成る決意をしてしまったのです。でも良いの本当にそれで？

Was the ring from the prince meant as an engagement ring? That part was good, but because of the strength of her admiration for the prince, the princess made up her mind to become a prince herself! But is that really good for her? (from ohtori.nu)

Perhaps the ring from the prince was meant as an engagement ring? Casting the thought aside, and overcome by an idolisation of the prince, the princess instead resolved to become a gallant prince herself! But is that really what she wants? (my translation)

「それはいいとして」 is an idiomatic phrase which, if taken literally, looks like it means “considering that good” or “that was good”. In reality, it means something more like “be that as it may”. A Japanese thesaurus gives synonyms such as 「それを置いといて」, which means “putting it aside for now”. It seems as though the translators from the ohtori scripts didn’t pick up on this nuance, which is surprising because they are usually quite accurate (if a little unnatural sounding).

憧れ (akogare) is a difficult word to translate here. It’s important that the translated word can’t be misinterpreted as the princess being infatuated with the prince. “Admiration” is ok, but it’s still sort of synonymous with love. 憧れ (akogare) contains notions of aspiration, it carries the implication of wanting to become like the target of their admiration, not simply being with them. This is why I chose to translate it as “idolisation”.

I see 「でもいいの？本当にそれで」 as a VERY important line in Utena. To read Utena as queer, this line from the narrator echoes words from straight cis people lacking understanding of someone’s desire to transition. This line is something you’d say to someone who came to a party and when you offered them a wide variety of options of drinks and food, they only took water - “Are you sure? Is that really what you want?” It’s suggesting that what she really wants, what she should really want, is to marry the prince, not become a prince. This line represents the world’s resistance to Utena’s gender non-conformity — even the narrator is questioning them!

girl: あーーーーー！ウテナ様ー！ girl: ウテナ様、あたしのタオルを使って下さい！ later… Anthy: 私は今、西園寺様の花嫁です。

girl: Aaaaaah! Utena is the master! girl: Master Utena, use my towel! later… Anthy: I am currently Master Saionji’s Bride.

One goal of my translation is to make it as accessible as possible to non-anime watchers, which means finding a good translation for 様(sama).

Why master? One good thing about it is that it’s vaguely masculine without being explicitly masculine (which 様 (sama) is not, but I like how this aspect assists with delivering some of the themes of the story). But more important than that, it can be used in the two critically important contexts 様 (sama) is used in — 1. as part of the Rose Bride’s obligation to show deference to the person she is engaged to, and 2. used by the schoolgirls who idolise Utena as a fun, affectionate nickname.

The Utena-sama nickname already exists among the girls at school before Anthy starts calling Utena that. Then the girls use it, they’re using it to jokingly emphasise how skilful and cool Utena is — a “basketball master”, a “master of cool”. This has a totally different connotation to the way Anthy uses it — she uses it sincerely, to show extreme deference to her literal master.

To establish this double meaning, I made cheeky use of what is essentially background dialogue. When the girls rush the basketball court to congratulate Utena, they scream “Utena-sama”, but I translated it as “Utena is the master”, which is then followed up with the first actual use of “Master Utena”.

[twst-hottest-takes]

I might have missed somethings while writing this hot take.

Hot take: Sebek should like humans.

I find it weird Sebek hates humans, not just because he's half human half fae. I find it weird because this man grew up with a human father, a human loving mother, two older siblings, and it's even told in some events that Silver and Sebek grew up together.

And I would understand if Sebek didn't like human culture, or if he didn't like humans who couldn't use magic. BUT THIS GUY REALLY HATES EVERY HUMAN. And I get it Lilia pulled out the "He grew up with a grandpa who didn't like humans." But I just don't really understand it. Not only because of his family either. I don't get it because he's been away from Briar Valley before, he's been around humans (and presumably beastmen) as a child. So I really don't understand how his speciest grandpa had such an influence on him.

I also don't really understand why Malleus holds such a different opinion from Sebek. I mean the human and fae war kind of caused his mom to die. And while I don't know THAT much about Malleus's grandma, I feel like she wouldn't really like humans, considering Sebek's grandpa is arguably younger than Malleus's grandma.

And while I do know Malleus was mainly raised by Lilia, is royalty, and did have Silver in his life. Sebek knew Lilia from a young age, and knew Silver as well! If the kingdom is willing to accept a prince who likes humans, shouldn't the royal guards be required to like humans?

I do question how much time he spends with Grandpa Zigvolt.

Now, I don't collect Sebek cards or read every character vignette, but I am under the impression that Sebek just spends a lot more time with his grandfather than his older siblings. However, I don't think that answers the questions here. How much influence does that man have? How much of it is from holding grudges and has any of it been watered down after his daughter married a human? I feel like there has to be some other factor to Sebek's past that contributes to his current bigotry and overall Malleus simpery. Was he made fun of or ostracized for being half human when he was younger? Was he made fun of or ostracized for being half fae? As anon pointed out, you'd think he'd have much more going towards him being more favorable to humans.

Now this conversation has struck an idea in me and we'll see if it makes sense or explains anything:

Hypothetically: Sebek loves Malleus. Sebek wants to be close to Malleus. Sebek pledges his life into servitude to Malleus. Sebek goes to closed-minded grandpa to learn how best to be a royal guard. Sebek also learns from Lilia, but Lilia's influence is much subtler in terms of ideology whereas Baur is very passionate and vocal about his feelings concerning the inferiority of humans (while somehow not badmouthing his family?). Sebek is also very passionate and vocal and latches onto Baur's words and takes them very much to heart. Sebek, being a stupid teenager, refuses to see any nuance or notice any holes in the way grandpa speaks or treats his daughter's family and instead just spouts off a firm belief that humans are trash compared to fae. Sebek essentially took what he liked about what grandpa said and made it a much bigger part of his personality and mindset than was maybe intended and now he's an obnoxious loudmouth with incerdibly transparent bigotry.

Tl;dr: Sebek is a teenager who thinks he knows everything about something he's passionate about and had just enough influence from home to make him think he's absolutely correct and currently has little to know wiggle room in terms of his current harmful outlook. His personality might also predispose him to being very proud and stubborn on certain viewpoints once he has committed to them (most people usually have at least one thing in their lives like this. I hope the train of thought makes sense.).

The good news is, it's obviously a setup for character development. I believe he's supposed to be very immature and he'll grow out of it when he learns a bit more about things like empathy and understanding.

As for the comparison to Malleus, I think this post is long enough for now and that's something that could be discussed in a later post. Suffice it to say, it also got me thinking.

~I am sorry if I got lost in the weeds there! Thank you for the take.

(Also, in regards to the guards being required to like humans as a reflection of their prince, the answer is "No." They may be commanded to not harm or antagonize humans, but I doubt there's much in the way of rules thay say, "Human-haters can't be in the army.")

(Also, also, I am so sorry this took so long to respond to! I honestly sat on my hands too long wondering what picture to feature along with this post. *facepalm*)

[echantedtoon]

Obsession 憑 Ch39

(Warnings for Yn's wound being reopened, blood, some maids ganging up and attacking her, Yn gets bullied, Jade gets knocked out by a scrub brush, etc.)

Tagging: @lavenderdropp @supernovacoffeestop @gilded-sunrays

Remember if you want to be added to the taglist lemme know

                           Part 4 Day-Night 

The silence after that was astounding to you. 

And you felt empowered by the way you had singlehandedly undone everything that they had wished to accomplish. You couldn't help but smile at the hurt look Yoriichi gave you and the glowering scowl Michikatsu gave his plate. Meanwhile their father continued to ignore everyone of you. 

The only disturbance was the clinking of chopsticks against silverware. Blissfully it was silent just the way you wanted it. This wasn't where you wanted your life to go, but you weren't going to complain about it. Especially since in the end you did gain a big victory even if it was small in the grand scheme of things. It wasn't long until a loud knocking on the other side sounded out.

"Enter."

The door slid open again but this time there was two people kneeling before the royalty inside the room. The guard from before and the older woman who had come in with Shinobu to bathe you and forced you into this ridiculous get up. 

"The head maid like you asked, Your Highness," the guard spoke. 

"Oh right." Without even looking up he asked you. "Are you sure you wouldn't want to reconsider marrying Michikatsu? You'll be treated the same as every other lowly servant here and lose any luxury."

"I'd rather work for the rest of my life." You shot Michikatsu a harsh look at the hurt look he had the audacity of giving you. 

"Suit yourself." A hand pointed to you. "That woman is to be put to work immediately. No special treatment shall be allowed."

"Yes, Your Highness. Shall that be all?", the older woman asked.

"Yes. Have a maid ready her old room for visitors. I suspect that many will be coming once the matchmaker starts setting up marriage interviews for my son."

"It shall be done, Sir."

"Good. Now take the dog away from my sight and go train her. I'm much too busy preparing for a meeting to deal with her any longer."

"Thank you for letting me talk and giving me this job," you said bowing to him no matter how MUCH you loathed doing so.

"Make sure the first thing you train her to do is to not bark until commanded!" 

You frowned angry but said nothing as you got up and just walked towards the exit. Both sets of plum red eyes following you longingly out the door where the door closed behind you with a click sound. You stood there while the older woman slowly stood up next to you and looked at you calmly with a blank face.

"Well, this is a surprise. You actually chose a life of labor over luxury."

"That luxury would've came with a terrible price." Red eyes narrowed at her. "They caused me so much grief. I'd rather work the rest of my life in servitude than to ever allow giving them the satisfaction they want. You probably think of me as crazy."

"Actually I do not fault you. There's many a woman who'd rather not be married to high ranked men. But from on this kind of talk stops." She turned serious. "From this day forth, you're now a member of staff under the Tsugikuni household. You shall not ever utter a word of disagreement towards them again lest you be punished. Am I understood?"

"Yes."

"Yes, Ma'am," she corrected you. "I am now your superior. You may refer to me as Ma'am or Madam or even Head Mistress if you prefer but you will address all superiors with respect and the royalty as their Highness or their lordship."

"I see. So this is the way?"

"That is right. Now the first thing we'll do is change your attire to something more fitting of your position." She then turned and started walking off. "Follow me."

"Yes, Ma'am."

"Very good. Keep that profession up on you."

"Yes, Ma'am."

You followed her back up the hall and through the palace gaining more odd looks from staff and those patrolling the castle. In one case as you turned the corner, you saw one of the other maids giving you a disgusted look before turning to another maid and whispering something to her but you only focused on where the woman took you. Which was a long hallway and a big room with a large room. She beckoned you inside and you followed her into a..giant empty room except for two large doors.

"This is the maids' courters," she explained walking up to one of the doors opening it to reveal a giant closet full of many bed sheets and nearly folded clothes. "You'll get one bed set, one uniform. It's your job to clean both. Laundry day is every Thursday. Over there is the bathroom." She pointed out the other large door in here. "Work starts at three o'clock sharp every morning. By then you're expected to be up, dressed presentably, with your bed away, and awaiting for your assignments for the day. ..This looks your size."

She pulled out a plain beige uniform that matched every other maid's outfit. Plain and simple. After a moment she nodded and held it out to you to which you slowly took it.

"You get one meal a day strictly at noon. If you don't get there in time you go hungry. Bedtime is always at eight unless you're on night duty. Do you understand everything I told you?"

"Yes, Ma'am."

"Good. Laziness and improper behavior is not tolerated and punishments are usually bad. I don't like seeing anyone get them so you'll do best to keep your head down and follow the rules. But first thing's first. Change out of those clothes and remove the hairpin. Those are for noble ladies and you're not but a servant now. When you're finished come into the hall. I'll be assigning you a guide for the first month."

She then left you in the cold room with nothing but the empty room for company. After a moment you unfurled the drab dress and looked at it. How did your life come to this? Still you'd rather be a servant than give either of those brothers the satisfaction of having you. So you got changed leaving the fancy things behind before going back out to the hallway and finding the Madam talking to the maids you saw earlier. They seemed to be smiling and happy until you walked up to them to which they turned and narrowed their eyes.

"Ah. Good. You're here." She gestured to the two women in front of you both. "Y/n this is Sakura and Jade. They've been here far longer than you have and know the routine. For the next month you'll be working alongside them as they guide you around."

"Yes, Ma'am. It's nice to meet you both."

Through strained smiles they nodded. "Nice to meet you too. We've heard SO much about you."

"Enough talk. You three are meant to work. You're first assignment is to clean this hall and the maids' courters. Between the three of you it should be done before noon. Get started on it."

Footsteps echoed throughout the hall as she turned to leave, leaving you alone with the two women who stood there smiling at you. They looked similar. The one called Jade was slightly taller than the one called Sakura, and Sakura had a smaller nose, but otherwise they could've been the same woman. Sisters? Cousin's maybe? 

"So you're Y/n! We've heard so much about you!"

Your brow rose at the obvious fake tone she used. "Really?"

Jade nodded. "Yes! You've been all anyone can talk about....All the time. Pretty infamous." You thought that much but hearing set a feeling of annoyance in your guts. "A woman like you is pretty unheard of."

"I've been told."

"Well it's still morning. Let's get cleaning so we don't miss out on lunch." That sounded good to you. You didn't eat a thing at the breakfast and you would rather have a good lunch. "I'll get the hallway, Jade can get the room, and you'll get our bathroom! With the three of us each doing a room, we'll be a lot faster."

You were kinda annoyed that YOU were stuck cleaning up the bathroom but you just nodded. "Alright then. Sounds fine."

"Great! I'll go get everything we need."

Sakura left momentarily but came right back with a broom, giant bucket, and a scrub brush for you. Shooting you off towards the bathroom before she turned to go get the same things for herself and Jade. Fine by you. You wanted to get started and get it over with. At least with the bathroom you didn't have to go far for water. So leaving Jade alone in the hallway, you left and found yourself in a large bathroom. Big enough to probably count as a bathhouse on it's own but obviously way less fancy. You deflated slightly seeing how big it was...but sucked it up and just got to work.

Sweeping away the floors. Scrubbing the floors on hands and knees before scrubbing at the wide bathtub. You preferred not to remember the toilets. By the end of it you were tired but satisfied with everything that was done. You stepped out into the large empty counters expecting to see Jade done or at least still working but blinked when you saw no one. The dirty floor wasn't even swept. The hallway told you the same thing. It hit you instantly.

Those rats! They left you to do all the work!

Immediately a bubble of anger burnt in your guts and in frustration you three down the scrub brush you were carrying. The thud sound echoed down the long hallway as it connected with the ground attracting the attention of a guard walking by. He stopped and looked at you with a frown.

"What are you doing, Woman?!," he demanded.

You jumped at the voice but gestured. "T-Those girls..they left me to do all the work-"

"Is the work done?"

"N-No but-"

"Then shut your tongue and finish it before you're punished for insubordination!" Your jaw dropped as he turned and started patrolling again. 

Your jaw dropped at the now empty space around you before slowly picking the scrub brush back up and sighing to yourself. This would not be easy. And it was not. You spent the entire noon into the evening sweeping and getting on your hands and knees scrubbing the floors until the giant room was clean and the hallway was nearly done. You were scrubbing towards the very beginning of the hallway nearly done when you heard the sounds of two pairs of footsteps and a moment later two pairs of feet stopped in front of your eyes. You slowly looked up and found the two forms of the girls staring down at you smirking.

"Oh great! All our work is almost done."

"No thanks to you! Where did you go?!"

"To go eat. Too bad you missed out. Soup is delicious but then again you wouldn't know since you were busy."

"Why did you just leave me?"

"Because you need to know your place." Gone was the smiles and smirks. Now two scowls were given to you. "A little rat like you scuttling your way up here like you're actually something special. It makes me sick."

"Not to mention that you think you're actually good enough to be with the princes! Dressing yourself up like a man.... Like you're worth anything." Then she kicked. The bucket went tumbling over as soapy water sloshed all over the floor as you stared wide eyed. "So we're going to show you where you truly belong! You're not different than the rest of us here! So finish cleaning up you mess and don't forget to soak up your water."

Then they left. Leaving you sitting there on your knees and soaking your legs in the soapy water. You stared at the floor for a long time before gritting your teeth and willing tears not to cry.

You are nothing that day. Going hungry until it was night time and all of the maids began to come back to sleep again. Most gave you odd looks but you had no idea if it was because you looked frazzled or if they shared the same mindset as the two sisters. But everyone filed in. Everyone grabbed a blanket set from the closet. You were deliberately pushed into the back of the line and by the time you got to the closet...it was bare. You stared at the empty space as Snickers filled the large room.

"Ladies, bed! Everyone knows the rules. Y/n, you're no exception to the rules. Go to bed."

"There's no more beds." You gestured to the closet as you looked at the blank faces woman.

"Then you'll have to sleep on the floor until you get one. As I said, no exceptions. Now lights out."

You stood there as the door closed like an idiot in a sea of smirks and evil cackling.

"Guess the princess isn't use to anything else but silk sheets. Don't worry. I bet if you dream hard enough the floor will feel just like them."

You shot whoever it was a look, but didn't give them the satisfaction of a reaction. You ended up curling up on the cold hard floor in front of the door. That night you barely got any sleep at all. Too cold. Too hard. Nothing like when you were back home. Back in your own snug bed with Nezuko just a few feet away sleeping soundly and Tanjiro in the room next over. Warm under your covers safe and sound in your small home. You hoped they were alright. You just wanted to go home. To wake up and have all of this be nothing but a bad dream. 

The following next few weeks were the some of the worst days of your life. 

It was the same routine every day. The same cruelty every day.

You were continued to be stuck to the cruel sisters. They would only mock you and leave you to do either all or most of the work load whether it be scrubbing floors, delivering laundry, or washing windows. No one offered help. No one spoke to you unless it was to mock or they had to. Cold night's were spent sleeping curled up on the cold floors and days were spent in cruelty. The cruelty amped up quickly as well. If started with one made purposely knocking into you making you drop an entire basket of clean sheets into a muddy spot on the ground. Then it escalated.

More shoves. Someone purposely pushing you forward in the line for lunch causing you to spill half of the hot soup on you and giving you small burns. Throwing your only dress into the water while you were bathing. You tried telling the head maid but she was no help at all.

"Unless I see it happen there's nothing I can do. It's your word against there's. What did you expect when you were put to work here?"

You were trapped here. The only saving grace was that  you didn't see or hear anything from Yoriichi or Michikatsu for the duration of your maid-hood. You sometimes saw Lord Tsugikuni as he made morning expectations around the palace before heading off to breakfast and then business, but you never paid attention to him other than forcing yourself to now as he walked past and he never gave you a second glance. Seems he had forgotten about your existence. Hopefully with some luck, those brothers would do the same.

One day it went from zero to a hundred as you were scrubbing the balcony on the second floor with a few just above the hot springs...The same hot springs you ran from when the visiting noble lady saw you. You were nearly done standing up to wipe off the railing..When suddenly the back of your neck got goosebumps and you heard snickering from behind you. You turned sharply but it was too late-

"AH!"

A sharp pain shocked through your shoulder as a broom handle whacked across you leading you to clutch your shoulder with a hiss. Blinking open you saw at least four other girls in front of you including the sisters.

"Oops. Sorry. I was just trying to hand it to you. Guess it must've slipped out of my grip."

You stood there staring at the four for a moment before your red eyes burnt. Hands were raised and you CHUCKED the scrub brush as hard as you could at Jade's face. It made contact giving a loud THUNK sound as it collided with her face. She stumbled backwards dropping the broom and collapsed onto the ground with like a sack of potatoes. 

Then there was silence. 

The three women stared in shock as you stood there panting and fuming at them.

"JADE!!" 

Sakura dropped the broom to immediately tend to her sister. You slowly blinked standing there still before freezing upon realization of what you'd done. Jade laid there unconscious as her sister patted her face over and over only to get no reaction. The other two maids stood there as stunned as you were. Your body reacting before your mind could process what had happened. Perhaps that's why you didn't see it coming when Sakura snapped to you with a murderous glare.

AND LUNGED AT YOU.

You barely had any time to react before you felt yourself be shoved backwards by a Sakura, slipping on the just mopped balcony still wet, and your back painfully hitting the railing-Something torn making you scream as you tumbled over it backwards-

...

And then there was a splash.

[imtryingbuck]

Three

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Summary: Y/n L/n becomes Queen of Astoria not that she wanted to. Prince James of Winterfeld meets her and falls in love.

Word count: 2,575

Warnings: angst. fluff. mentions of being hung and murdered by arrows (it does not happen!) groping.

Masterlist   Series Masterlist

All she had to do was spend time with the man, it didn’t mean she was going to marry him on the spot and begin trying to pop out heirs. Her mother promised her that if she did not like the man then she would drop the topic all together. Even though she was now Queen and one of the most skilled warriors in the army she was still a child at heart, holding up her pinkie finger she made her mother wrap her own around her digit and pinkie swear.

“Please spend more than five minutes with the man before you decide.” Y/n nodded reluctantly, her original plan going straight out the window.

Prince Brock Rumlow was the man her mother had chosen. It was less than five minutes before she wanted to leave and call the meeting off. Yes he was a attractive but truthfully that is all he had going for him. He was dull, rude and so full of himself she struggled to remain stoic as he talking about himself and himself, oh and more importantly himself. She made the mistake of looking at Carlson who stood by the wall with the rest of the knights, he put an imaginary noose around his neck, closing his eyes and sticking his tongue out - she failed to stop the unattractive snort noise she made.

“What is so funny?”

“N-nothing, my prince. Please continue.”

The kingdom was bustling with the arrival of the King and Queen from Winterfeld - a neighbouring kingdom - that was coming to meet the new queen for the first time. The queens mother was busy greeting them and their family as Y/n was dying a slow and painful death called boredom as Prince Brock droned on and on.

“I am sorry that the Queen is not available at this moment, a feast will be held tonight in honour of your arrival.”

“It is understandable. Where is the Kings second wife?” Queen Winifred asked.

“S-she passed away.”

“Oh, oh I am so sorry! How are the princess’s doing?”

“I will admit they aren’t doing great but they are strong little darlings.” Her mother was giving them a tour of the castle before showing them to their chambers that they would be calling home for a week.

As her mother was busy with the King and Queen of Winterfeld, Y/n had changed out of her dress and into her training clothes and made her way to the training grounds with Carlson and a handful of her most trusted knights following closely behind her. It took her slightly longer to arrive as the townsfolk would stop her to say their hello’s and wishing her good luck in the makeshift circle, she spoke to each and every one of them.

“You have not been here for quite a while now, I do not know how you will do.” Carlson said with a smirk on his lips.

“I will pick you for my first opponent then shall I?”

“And lose? Surely I will be hung for treason”

“I will never have you hanged, no I would shoot a thousand arrows at you” Carlson gasped dramatically as she laughed.

As they arrived they noticed that there was a small crowd around the circle, some of them there she did not recognise. Those that did noticed her and moved over so she could lean on the wooden railing and watched as two of her warriors fought against each other, she was told a wager had been made - if Luka won he was able to propose to Lelands sister, his opponent, if Leland won Luka had to run around the whole kingdom in his birthday suit. She had to laugh, and admit that she didn’t know which one she wanted to win more.

Luka won.

Leland was not happy.

Carlson jumped over the wooden railing, Y/n throwing his shield to him, he looked around analysing each person there to pick out the person who would fight him - even though he already knew who he was going to pick. “You.” He smirked and pointed his sword towards Y/n.

“Me? Oh how kind of you!” Y/n was quick to jump over the railing too, her shield being passed to her. As she got into position she heard an unfamiliar voice.

“A woman? That is not fair, she should not be fighting.”

Y/n smirked and nodded to Carlson, who winked before lunging at her - not at all going easy on her. The loud clanking of their swords battling against one another rang out in the air, Carlson knocked her shield out of her hand - Y/n smirked, and lunged at her friend, her sword beating off the shield, using the side of her sword she hit him in his side. He dropped his shield and surrendered. This action made her and win the round. Everyone cheered, the new men that had made their presence known all laughing at Carlson for losing against a woman.

“Which one of you fine gentleman said that women should not be fighting?”

“I did sweetheart. You only won because he went easy on you, you know on the battle field the enemy won’t go easy.” She looked over to where the voice came from and smiled. A man leaning on the railing like the rest - handsome man with light curly shoulder length hair, slight stubble of hair on his face, his eyes were bright blue.

As handsome as he was he was a fool for two reasons, the first being that he obviously had no idea who she was, and secondly for daring to call her sweetheart.

“And who may you be?”

“Prince James of Winterfeld, and you?” Bless his heart, he laughed along with those from her kingdom thinking they were laughing with him and not at him.

Foolish man indeed.

“Well Prince James, I am the person who challenges you to get into the circle with me, just as long as you do not mind going easy on me.”

“Challenge accepted. And I promise you sweetheart, I will not.”

Carlson hands over his sword and shield to the brunette, telling him ‘good luck’ before climbing back over to where he was stood originally.

“Come on then sweetheart, I promise not to embarrass you.”

Y/n rolled her eyes at him, and began circling him - making him follow her every movement, she knew exactly what she was doing. The second he took his eyes off her she lunged at him, he stumbled back not expecting the attack but he managed to gain control. Once again the only sounds being heard from the woods were the sound of two swords clashing with each other.

James had to admit that he was impressed by her moves, her grace and the fact that she wasn’t struggling for breath even though this was her second round in the circle. She began getting the upper hand against him, he was trying to justify that by getting distracted by her beauty. He had truly never laid eyes on more of a beautiful woman before in his life.

To gain the upper hand against the woman who wasn’t backing down, James ducked as she swung her shield from the side trying to hit him, in his crouched position he sliced her right leg with his sword, blood quickly flowing from the wound. The hiss she let out satisfied him as he was growing annoyed at how he was being bested by a woman. He wanted to laugh at the men from the kingdom who were willing to jump over the railing to protect her, and how they looked concerned when she shook her head and carried on with their fight.

James looks to the side where the woman looks to - not realising it was a distraction - he had no time to react to the woman’s leg sweeping his own under him. Her sword being pointed to his chest, his hands went up.

“Looks like you have lost to a woman, my Prince. I apologise if I have embarrassed you.” He gives her a tight lipped smile watching her climb back over the railing, the man who she was fighting with before whispering something in her ear and she leaves.

“You alright Buck?” Steve asks his best friend and Prince.

“I think I am in love with the mad woman.”

The large hall was full of Lords, Ladies, knights and servants, James - who preferred to be called Bucky - had to admit that the hall was better than the one at home. After introductions and handshakes with the lords and ladies, his family was introduced to the Princess’s, Bucky had to admit that they were all beautiful but his thoughts were on the beautiful mad woman who had bested him earlier that day.

Sitting down next to Steve his eyes darting around the hall in hopes that she would be there, slumping back in his seat he turned to Steve. “After I have met the Queen I am going to leave and try to find the mad woman, cover for me please.”

“The woman from earlier?”

“Yes.”

“Why do you want to find her?”

“Hopefully I can make her a princess.”

“You call her a mad woman when you are talking about marrying a woman who bested you. You are the mad one.” Steve laughed.

“Yes, we can be the mad married couple.”

Steve goes to reply but gets cut off by the Royal Herald announcing that the Queen had arrived. Every single person in the hall stood up, the knights shifting their stances as the large wooden doors came open.

Bucky’s jaw dropped.

It was her. His mad woman. She was the Queen of Astoria.

She walked with her head held high, a crown sitting upon her head, her dress was a dark red and black. Before walking up to her seat, she greeted the King and Queen with a slight nod of her head, Bucky knew that she could feel his eyes burning a hole at the side of her face but she was ignoring him.

Steve had to pull on his arm to sit after everyone else does, he was so lost in trance that he didn’t notice everyone sitting. All that kept running through his head was that the beautiful mad woman was a Queen. A Queen he had fought against. And that’s when it dawned on him, he had hurt the Queen! That’s why the men tried to intervene, they were protecting her after he had sliced at her leg!

“- and this is our son, James.” His mothers words snapped him out of his spiralling mind.

“It is a pleasure to meet you, sweetheart.”

Nobody around them questioned the nickname she had given him, though Carlson and Steve chuckled. “The pleasure is all mine, my Queen.”

Throughout the meal Bucky couldn’t keep his eyes off her as she talked to the man who he found out was named Carlson, and talked with his parents. He was waiting for her smile to drop and order her guards to drag him into the dungeon before having him hung but so far a pretty smile was still sat on her lips, he was also nervous of tension brewing between the two kingdoms and him having to admit to his parents that it was all his fault.

“I have heard they call you the Warrior Queen, why is that?” His mother asked her, she tried to repress the smirk off her lips as she sees James sinking slowly in his seat.

“I am the only woman to ever fight in my father’s army, I have been to many battles for him.”

“How many battles have you been in?” The King then asked.

“My first one was when I was sixteen. My father did not know I was there until the battle was over.” She chuckled, the King and Queen joining in.

“Will you continue to fight now?” The Queen asked.

“Of course. I will be right at the front and centre, my men will not fight without me being there.”

“A true Queen you are” King George said, she smiled at him. Though her smile quickly dropped off her face and that had Bucky’s heart pounding. 

“You. Yes you, come here.” She points at a knight who looked absolutely terrified. His eyes darting between her and his King, as he slowly made his way over to her. “You may get away with groping the servants where you are from, but you do not come into my home and do the same to mine. I see or get informed that you have done it again I will hang you myself. Is that understood?”

“Y-yes Queen.”

“Larissa, come here.” Larissa’s cheeks heated up as all eyes went on her as she moved forward, bowing to her Queen she waited. “Apologies to her.”

“I-I am sorry.” He was mortified. He was a knight and was being made to apologise to someone lower than him.

“It’s fine.” Larissa mumbled.

“Larissa darling, you may go back to what you was doing. You, get out of my face. I will say this once and never repeat myself, any man regardless of your station touches my girls I will hang you all myself. Now let the music continue.” She sits back in her seat and turns her head to Carlson having a quiet conversation.

The King was furious. Not because the young Queen had scolded his knight but because the knight had done something that even he wouldn’t permit. “Queen Y/n, I must apologise for his behaviour. I can assure you that I do not let that happen in my home and I will promise you that he will be punished for his behaviour.”

“It is fine, I believe the man has learnt his lesson.”

“My Queen, may I be bold enough to ask you for a dance?” Bucky spoke up, truthfully unaware where he had gained the confidence. When she nodded and stood the crowd dispersed off the floor, sitting down to watch their Queen dance with the Prince.

As the music began again Bucky took her hand in his, the other going to her waist. “When are you going to tell my parents what I did?”

“What do you mean?”

“I harmed you!”

She chuckled. “It was a scratch. I have had worse.”

“Are you going to have me hung?”

“It would have already happened if I wanted that. Do not fret sweetheart, I do not want to kill the only son of the King and Queen of a neighbouring kingdom.”

“Very well. I am sorry for what I did, though if I had known who you really were I would not have gotten into the circle with you.”

“Why?”

“Because you are a Queen…”

“I am a daughter, a sister, a friend and a solider before I am the Queen and you do not need to apologise, you put up a good fight.”

“I could have won if you had not distracted me!”

“If I agree will that help you sleep easier tonight?”

“Yes…”

“Very well. If I had not distracted you, you would have still lost.”

His parents and her mother watched as they danced, they all hear the dramatic gasp falling from the princes’ lips and the giggle from the queen. The two mothers share a look of joy and hope.

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[hiseyeisonthesparrow]

Hi! I’ve been learning more about Mormonism lately, and I know that Mormon progressives like you definitely exist. However, I’ve been finding it really difficult to understand how people can reconcile their faith with the verse 2 Nephi 5:21 without believing in white supremacy. I understand there are theories about it being metaphorical, but I’ve been having trouble understanding them. If you could offer me some insight, I would truly appreciate it! Thank you in advance.

Thanks for your question! I am unfortunately painfully white, so I may not be the most experienced of people to answer this lol. I'll give it a shot though!

A big tenet of our faith is finding trustworthy sources for questions we have. One of my favorite sources on this topic is a video my dad sat all of our family down and made us watch when we were young*: a talk given by a Black religious scholar called "Blacks In The Scriptures: Skin Color & Curses". It's 45 minutes long, but if this is something you're serious about learning about, you should watch it. You can even 2x speed it if you'd like. You can find it here.

A common archaeological theory is that the Lamanites married, had children with, and culturally assimilated into more of the indigenous population, leading to darker skin. Another idea is that the Lamanites used body paint or decorations that darkened their skin, which would explain the darker skin but not the curse aspect.

Even if the "curse of blackness" is literally about race -- which I doubt it is -- it doesn't mean that, in our gospel, dark skin equals evil.** As the Nephites grew in power and resources, they became prideful and stopped believing. The Lamanites did begin to believe and even became more righteous than the Nephites at one point. As a religion, we also believe that man cannot be punished for the sins of their fathers, called generational sin [see Article of Faith 2]. Those blessed with melanin are no better or worse than any white folk -- all souls are alike and equally capable of exaltation.

[When you look, we have far more scriptures about all people and races being equal than we do about curses of black skin.]

I will be the first to admit that our religion has not had... the best relationship with race. On an episode of Brothaz in the Foyer, they shared this idea that "[Even] outside of church... any organization that's over 100 years old is gonna have some type of history around racism or prejudice." [Side note: that video is also an incredible resource! I would recommend watching it. The Brothaz share their perspectives and experiences regarding race in their religion, and I think it's a helpful resource even if you're not struggling with this concept. It's good to branch out and hear experiences from minority groups in the Church.]

To be entirely honest, I don't entirely understand 2 Nephi 5:21 myself. There are many parts of my faith that don't quite make sense to me, with my earthly mind. Expecting that every member of the Church has to understand and be an expert on every part of our religion is like expecting that every person who loves dinosaurs has a perfect explanation on whether or not there is evidence for a feathered Tyrannosaurus Rex. Not understanding a "curse of blackness" doesn't undermine the idea that I believe in a God who sent a Savior who died for my sins and wants me to return to him. Just because I don't know if T. Rex had feathers doesn't mean I don't believe that dinosaurs existed, you get me?

Anyways, I know I didn't quite answer your question, but hopefully the sources I shared with you can help you come to a conclusion about this [I don't feel experienced enough on this topic to share my own opinions lol, I'll leave it to the theologians of color to explain] And, I might mention, although it's very forward of me to say so, that you could pray about this issue. You don't have to, of course, but it's always an option to anyone struggling with anything ever. Who knows -- you might learn something! :}

Thank you for your ask!

*I grew up in a STAUNCHLY anti-racist household -- went to Juneteenth celebrations, attended protests, met and served friends of color, etc. -- so making the 7 year old learn about Hebrew idioms about race was not too weird for us

** The doctrine, at least, does not say anything about white supremacy. That doesn't mean that members can't misinterpret gospel doctrine and be horribly racist. I have heard of encounters with many a racist Mormon, and my heart aches for all those who have been prejudiced against at the hand of racist Church members.

[wolfintestinez]

ADAM STANHEIGHT HEADCANONS : 📼

hi hi ! here’s a few of my headcanons ! it’s not all of them but it’s the ones i have down, at the very least. 🗡️

- religious wendys / burger king eater.

- also a huge pepsi drinker, he rarely drinks anything else.

- as before, i am a tongue piercing truther, but it’s the only piercing he has. he’s scared of needles and it was a stupid thing that scott convinced him to do, he barely made it out of the healing process.

- it’s often he is rolling it around in his mouth without even realizing it, like he’s fidgeting.

- if he’s not listening to his ‘obscure’ hardcore bands, he’s listening to shit like oingo boingo. he will NOT admit it.

- he sticks around scott because he didn’t make too many friends in highschool, and he can’t stand the idea of having to start anew when it comes to the whole social scene. besides, being friends with scott has its perks (even if it means dealing with the toxicity). for example, there’s always something to do on a friday night.

- he didn’t drop out of highschool, but he did drop out of community college. he couldn’t be motivated to actually decide on what to do with his life, so he chose the only hobby he really enjoyed and made a career out of it. needless to say, his parents were not happy.

- speaking of his parents , he’s only close with his mother (kind of). his parents weren’t married, and have an odd relationship. his father is negligent, and pretty much just an asshole, while his mother cared about him enough to try and help when she could. but most of the time she stands by his fathers side, trying to play mediator.

- he only hates his father more as he sees his temper in himself. he’s angry, but he’s not sure what he’s ever exactly angry at. if anything, he’s an all around emotional guy, he just doesn’t know how to display them. he tends to blow up when overwhelmed.

- awkwardly charismatic, we can see this in the deleted ‘rockstar’ scene. it’s the weird bouts of confidence he gets, but it can so easily be torn down and his sarcastic self defense mechanism gets kicked in.

- undiagnosed autistic IDC IDC !!! his special interest is photography and biology. weirdly enough, he always had the highest grades in his biology classes.

- when he drinks he’s a lot more social, but he can get out of control really fast. an impulsive drinker if anything. he can get stupid and start fights that he definitely cannot win.

- sort of insecure when in relationships, but he doesn’t ever have the guts to speak about until he’s making snide remarks and blowing up a few days later.

- has way too much knowledge over b-list horror movies, it annoys anyone who’s watching one with him. he really enjoys killer klowns from outer space.

- a cat person, he feeds the strays outside of his apartment complex. if he knew that he could support a pet financially, he would take on in.

- very blunt with his opinions, which will also get him into a lot of trouble. if he thinks your favorite movie of artist is bad, then he’s gonna say it.

- a touch starved loser, but he’s not good at initiating it. but as soon as he gets the go ahead, there’s no boundary doubting him.

[rkivees]

Seo Hyesook, Cristina Yang, Ellis Grey and the pressure placed by society on women to become mothers

In last week's episode, Love Next Door brought a serious discussion to the forefront of the drama. In a society where women are increasingly pressured to have children due to South Korea having the lowest birth rate in the world, giving a character the space to be honest about how she feels about her place in marriage, motherhood and society was a bold and much appreciated choice so I wanted to talk a bit about it.

Does she love her husband and her son? Yes, not only does she say this in this scene, but she also says it in future scenes, but none of this makes her pain any less real or any less valid. She resented her husband, her marriage life and her son all the same because she was happy as a Diplomat and she wanted to keep that life but now she is a mother and the world is not kind to working mothers. There was this kdrama once who had doctors multiple times say they didn't like hiring women because they soon get married and become mothers and rarely come back to work. I wonder why. Even if you wanted to go back, would you go back to a hostile environment?

Women are told from an early age that they should find a good man, get married and have children. This is their role in society and if they dare to try to break out of it, they are judged and shamed.

That's why this scene made me think so much about Cristina and Ellis, two equally strong and talented characters who are faced with the decision of whether or not to have children. Cristina finishes her act in the show by not having any and she states that she doesn't hate kids, she respects them and wishes them to have parents that want them. She loves her career more and she feels complete like that.

Ellis, on the other hand, had not only one, but two daughters. One was lucky enough to have an adopted family that loved her very much. And then we have Meredith, who was well aware she was not wanted. Below we have a quote of her coming forward in Cristina's defense.

Do you know what will happen to Cristina if she has a kid that she doesn't want? It will almost kill her. Trying to pretend that she loves a kid as much as she loves surgery will almost kill her, and it'll almost kill your kid. Do you know what it's like to be raised by someone who didn't want you? I do. To know you stood in the way of your mother's career? I do. I was raised by a Cristina. My mother was a Cristina. And as the child she didn't want, I am telling you, don't do this to her because she's kind and she cares and she won't make it. The guilt of resenting her own kid will eat her alive.

We get to see Cristina's future if she had children and it's much like Seo Hyesook. They try to overcompensate (they love their kid after all) that resentment while being eaten alive by it or we get women like Ellis, a woman unhappy in her motherhood, that traumatized her daughter to a point she didn't want to be alive.

Ellis never tried to hide her unhappiness and I am not, of course, exempting her for the bad mother she was but I want you to understand that if she wasn't put in this position to begin with, we would not have a traumatized child. Society cannot be absolved of the blame for creating unfit mothers that didn't want to be mothers and children who suffer from that unfitness.

I think it's a discussion that needs to be had, especially since we're going through a time worldwide where women are losing their right to choose and we get told more and more that there's a certain place for us, barefoot in the kitchen tending to our husbands and children.

We have to talk about it, about our choices or the lack of and how our place is wherever we want to be so we won't end up in a position where we resent our lives.