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#they just pull ideas from the depths of their own asses
chlorinecake · 4 months
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SO PRETTY IT HURTS | rough and handsy sex scenarios with switch!enha legal line ft. nsfw links
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⟡ synopsis ⨾ basically just how each enhypen member would feel about you being rough with them in the bedroom
⟡ contains ⨾ NSFW LINKS, hair pulling, biting, slapping/spanking, marking, scratching, and unprotected sex
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— HEESEUNG gives off the vibe that he'd be really into having a bit of pain mixed with his pleasure, whether that was you slightly grazing your teeth against his shoulder as he fucked into you, or you desperately clawing at his chest while riding him… Just imagine how cute Heeseung's scrunched up face would look in moments like that, his needy hands clinging unto your ass as his hips thrusted upwards at a rapid pace, both of you chasing your highs...
— JAY wouldn’t be too against the idea of having you rough him up a bit during sex, especially if it meant he was doing a good job of pleasing you... Just the feeling of your fingers tugging at his messy locks while he ate you out would be more than enough to keep him excited until he finally had you bent over on the mattress, holding your ass in place right before filling you up with his warm cum.
— JAKE is the playful type, so I can totally see him enjoying some switchy behavior in the bedroom, round one beginning with him domming you as usual, up until your nails dug into his shoulders for more leverage, bouncing in his lap like a touch deprived fuck bunny... It’d definitely be a tantalizing combination for him, but he always liked feeling crazy with you anyways, biting down on his lip at the sight of you finishing him off.
— SUNGHOON often treated sex with you like some sort of competition, especially whenever you behaved like a brat in need of taming before you two even reached the bedroom... a catty smirk would stain his features at the frustrated look on your face at his teasingly slow thrusts, provoking you to gently tap slap at his chin for a little sexual encouragement... oh when I tell you he’d get so into it after you hit him, fucking into your tightness with all his strength as you squirt all over the sheets, making him go weak in the knees…
— SUNOO doesn’t really strike me as the type to enjoy pain by any means, but it’d always be a treat for him to see you going so crazy underneath him as he fucks into you that his tiny groans could hardly keep you from marking him even more. The guy legitimately never came harder than when you’d tug at his hair while in missionary, or bite into the plush flesh of his neck to contain your moans from how well he was pleasing you …
— JUNGWON seems like such a sucker for rough stuff to me, whether that be on the giving or receiving end... Just imagine it: Jungwon fucking into you with all his might while you let your hazy vision wander, looking at the marks you left along his neck, and how pretty his hands looked wrapped around your waist matching your whimpers with his own as you both chased your highs together…
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⚠︎ author’s note: Just another fic I had marinating in the depths of my private posts because it didn't do too well at first... hopefully y'all like what I've done with this time tho !!
⚠︎ tag list: @squoxle @nikisvanillaccola @wonbinisbabygurl @addictedtohobi @ashgonedash @yourmomscuntis2tighy @watamotee33 @ot7sevenlvr
⚠︎ path to my enhypen bookshelf if you’re interested !!
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bi-writes · 7 months
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so idk where i got this idea but mercenary!ghost x fem!reader because he's scary and mean and dangerous but then he sees some girl's ass in light blue denim.
notes about reader: as always, i tend to write readers described as curvy because im curvy and we deserve attention from 6'4 beefcakes who are soft only for us. reader is a civilian.
mercenary!ghost (part 1/?)
cw: mature language and content, suggestive language and content, dark!ghost, mentions of ghost's past canon trauma (domestic abuse + violence), mw3 spoilers, violence and gore + mentions of murder and extortion, mentions of reader + domestic abuse, protective!simon, size kink (reader is described as much smaller than simon, easily manhandled by him), pet names (luv, bunny + rabbit, puppy, angel face), reader learns she has a dark side and she likes it, nsfw thoughts about reader, suggestive touching (fem!receiving)
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the sound of the burner phone pings on the desk in front of him. when he picks it up, he narrows his eyes as he reads the message displayed across the screen.
DEPOSITED.
when he opens his laptop, his eyes scan over the balance on an offshore account, and he relaxes when he sees the hefty balance climb just a little higher. he closes the device once he's satisfied with what he sees; and like always, he tastes the warmth of that satisfaction. it's a nice high, but it won't last, and then he'll need to feed the gaping hole that lives in him.
it remains hungry. he has never been able to close it--it has only ever gotten wider, ripped at the seams and torn at the edges every time another body close to him drops.
the high is poison. but even if it kills him, no one will miss him. so he picks up the handgun that lays haphazard on the bed, and he tucks it into the back of his jeans.
he passes by the mirror as he fits a dark denim jacket over his shoulders. he stares back at himself, a recognizable beast of a man staring right back. he pulls his hoodie up over him, and in the shadow of it, all he can see are his dark eyes, pale skin peeking through the eyeblack that has lightened up with the wear of it throughout the day.
he craves something strong and warm tonight. he itches for something soft, too, something that makes him forget the red on his ledger, even if for only a few hours.
there is nothing quite strong enough to wipe that kind of stain away. he is nothing if not a reaper, and he buries bodies with the same tenacity that he had when he wore his country's flag on his chest. this time, however, he does not take orders--he names his price.
he thinks something is wrong with him. some used to say that it was his courage that brought him back from the dead--that his heart is too strong, his will to live too much, and that is how he continues to open his eyes and live another day. but he doesn't agree with this thought, because he doesn't really think he feels anything at all.
he doesn't feel human. he doesn't feel alive. the only thing that makes him feel any sort of vulnerability is how red his own blood is when he bleeds. when his scars heal jagged and crooked, it is because there is something underneath the skin. but he feels nothing inside--no remorse, no guilt, he is not sorry.
he does not check to see if those men are innocent. he does not care about the names that end up on his list. he doesn't ask questions. and he thinks something is wrong with him because he sleeps at night just fine now; the nightmares have gone. he is alone, and it is peaceful.
there are no voices. there is only silence. and there is something wrong with him.
the pub is quiet. it is a weekday, and the only patrons are here after a long day's work, and they all look into the depths of their half-empty glasses hoping to find relief there. there is none, but they will finish their glasses hoping it might be dissolved in the alcohol.
he asks for two fingers of bourbon. it stings when it goes down, but then it settles warm. he is poured another two fingers of it, but before he can pick it up, someone else grips the glass and tips it back to swallow it down.
the glass hits the wood of the counter with an echoing thud, and you cough out a fuck as you settle into the seat beside him. you run a trembling hand over your face, and he notices immediately the red of your knuckles and the splitting of the skin there. they are fresh; the bruising is still new, and the blood is just barely beginning run down the back of your hand.
he leans over the bar, swiping the whole bottle of bourbon, and he silently pours more into the glass, hitting it towards you before picking up a new glass and filling it generously.
"who's the lucky bastard?" he asks, and your eyes flick to the cuts on the back of your hand before going back to the dark swirling colors of the drink.
"i'm sure he'll be coming in here any second to introduce himself."
the pub doors slam open, and there is a man coming in, chest heaving, dark hair falling over his forehead in sweaty curls that do nothing to hide the clear bruise on his face the split of his lip. his eyes move over the room before they settle on you, and his boots fall heavy as he makes his way over.
ghost sees his intentions clear immediately. the way his hand twitches at his side, the angry glare, the uncontrollable urge to hurt and to take and to control coming off of him like steam.
he has seen this kind of man before. this man was the one that kept him up at night as a child. this man was the one that scared his mum, that drove his brother to chase vices, that tore apart a house that should've been filled with something warm and sticky and kind into one marred with teeth, rotten and putrid and forgotten.
his hand goes for the back of your neck, and you close your eyes and tense in the anticipation, but it never comes. a strong hand grips his outstretched one, and the man cries out as ghost twists it behind his back and uses his other hand to slam his face into the wood of the bar, trapping him there.
the bartender does not even flinch, just continues to wipe down glasses. the patrons continue to stare into the abyss of their sorrow.
you jump a little, your head snapping to the side where the man squirms and sputters, his face going pale from the paw of a hand gripping him by the back of the neck and shoving his face into the counter. if he pushes any harder, you wonder if it'd splinter and fray, dig into the bones of his bruised cheek.
"this man botherin' ya, yeah?"
your eyes finally flick up. you do not know what you expect, but it isn't this. you can only see his eyes; they scare you. you do not lie because you aren't entirely sure how far his kindness will go.
"yes," you whisper, and when the man tries to spit at you, a rough gloved hand grips his curls and positions his head against the edge of the counter, forcing his mouth open until the top row of his teeth bite the wood.
"y'keep talkin' to her, n'it'll be the last time you talk, hear that, mate? y'talk to me, n'me only."
you swallow hard, and the man trembles. a strong boot hits the back of his knees, and then he's crumbling to the ground, his jaw straining as the counter is still forced against his mouth. hot, pained tears come down his face, and then he addresses you.
"what did he do?"
"bad first date," is all you can manage to sputter. he grips the man by the scruff of his neck before pulling him off to speak, tilting his head to the side as he observes the begging man on his knees.
"y'try to put your hands on'er?"
"i-it wasn't...like that! i-it was just a mis...a misunderstanding, please! please--please tell him--!"
"don't like fuckin' liars either," is the only warning given before his mouth is forced to bite the counter, and then a sharp elbow comes down on his head. you jump in surprise at the suddenness of it all, and you close your eyes when you hear the crunch of teeth being broken. his scream is enough to rattle the pub, but when you look around, it's as if nothing at all has happened. it is quiet, and all the bartender does is shake their head.
when you open your eyes, he's crawling on his hands and knees out of the pub, and what he leaves behind is a mess of blood and teeth and fluid that are splattered against the floor at your feet. you shake as you look up at him, stiff in your seat and soft tears coming down your face.
he towers over you. you have to tilt your head back between your shoulders to look at him face-to-face. you cannot see his face; he hides it behind dark fabric, but his eyes talk loud. they are dark, and they are dull, and you realize as you stare up at him that he is not phased in the slightest by what he had just done. in fact, he steps into your space, and the squelch of blood under his boot doesn't seem to bother him. he wears black, and you wonder, momentarily, if he wears such a color to hide the red hiding between the threads of the fabric. the red he can't wash away.
"let me look at ya, little rabbit."
you flinch when he knocks your knees apart, spreading them to make space for the width of him. he reaches up with one gloved hand and grips your chin, tilting your head to either side to see if you are hurt anywhere but your hand. when he is satisfied with his observations, he cups the expanse of your throat, smoothing those big fingers along the pulsing vein there and feeling the way you swallow.
so alive. so soft. a pretty little bunny, dropped into his waiting hands.
his eyes fall, and he takes you in. wide hips that take up the seat you're sitting in, hugged so nicely by light blue denim jeans. they curve over the swell of your ass, and he wonders how much of it would fit in his palm--he thinks about how it might feel to spread them apart and taste the succulent sweetness that he knows exists between your thighs and how your mouth might look slack jawed and wide open for him.
you look like a good girl, even with bloody knuckles.
then he follows the line of your shirt. it's a simple t-shirt tucked into your jeans, but the neckline gives a nice peek of you and the curve of your tits--they sit so nicely there, all perky, and ghost thinks they look lonely. they would be better off in his mouth or squeezing his cock between them or pebbling between his dirty gloved fingers.
filthy. disgusting. he is scarred all over, and you look so soft and sweet, with those tender puppy eyes and the way your lips tremble, and he bets you kiss all soft and slippery. he bets your cunt is tight and with enough coaxing, he could make you drench his skin with something decadent and slick, with whatever drools into your panties. he imagines it is there now, even as you tremble and shake and plead with your eyes for him to let go of your throat.
but ghost is not a good man. he does not feel; he is not a man at all. he is a beast in the shape of one, disguised, and he brings misery to everything he touches. he knows he will do it to you, too--touching pretty girls, he leaves them with burns. they are not the same after they are with him, and he wants to feel bad about it, he wants to feel something, but he does not. he feels nothing.
"you olright, luv?"
you nod frantically, putting a hand over his wrist that holds you, and he almost laughs. your hand is so much smaller than his own. if he squeezes his hand just a little harder, he figures it would not take much to break what lies beneath it. he leans in, and you gulp when your thighs trap his hips. he is warm, a furnace that burns, but you relax when the side of his mask nuzzles against your face.
he is a dog, and he is fond of you.
you should run. you should hit him like you hit your wretched date, and you should run, far, away from him, swear off men for good and never allow one in your space again lest they be as beastly as this. you should run while you can, but you are a bunny not yet in his trap, and you still have time to escape.
but then both of your eyes open at the same time, and his eyes meet your own, and then--oh.
the cage snaps shut. it rattles around you. it is small and confined, but you don't realize what it is yet because you can still breathe, and it is still warm, and you are still soft and alive and here.
your face softens, and his eyes flicker down to your lips as you lick them. maybe he was right. liars are bad. men like the one you were with before were scum. you had been with men like that before, you had seen the destruction they brought to those they thought they loved. when they wrought fear and made others bleed, they never got in trouble. no one cared to do to them what they deserved because they silenced their lambs and slaughtered the light out of them.
it is biblical--an eye for an eye. if they take from you, why can't you take from them?
it is brutish men like this one that do what others are too timid to. your thighs close around his hips, and you feel something digging into your leg, something metal and heavy tucked into his jeans. a weapon, but you imagine it is a mercy because you have an inkling that what he does with his hands is so much worse. bullets are clean and fast; his hands are not.
johnny would tell him to let you go. he does, over his shoulder, spitting at him to leave, to let you slip through his fingers and find your way out, to open the cage.
the wee lass--look at 'er angel face. let 'er go--not meant for this, LT. she scares. 's in 'er eyes. won't last.
but he does not feel. he is not human. there is something wrong with him, he knows it, but he doesn't care. he will ruin you, and he should feel bad, but he can't, he doesn't. and then there it is--your eyes are flickering low, eyeing the mask, and you are wondering how much effort it would take to push it up and lick into his mouth, taste him, suck the warmth of the bourbon from his mouth and replace it with your own.
he will kill again. the cage is shut, it is locked, and he is watching the bunny in its cage, watching as it becomes aware of its surroundings, takes in what is new. but just like he figures, just like he knows, this little bunny has no idea what this cage is. she has no idea she is even in one.
fuck what johnny says. if johnny was like him, if he was not skin and bone but steel and reptile, he would not have died. he would have come back. he would have moved his head, shaken the blood off, and gotten back up, but he didn't, and he's not here, and he's not real--so fuck what he thinks, fuck what he says, fuck him because he left me, and i'm all alone, and if i don't devour and eat and tear apart, i will wither away because i am not me, i am something else--
he smiles under the mask. you notice it, the slight movement there, and you smile, too, suddenly. his hand falls, and the back of his knuckles graze over the swell of your breast, down your stomach, and then he's gripping your waist. that hand slips behind you, and you brace yourself with both hands on his chest as he cups one side of your ass. possessive and suffocating--you think maybe you should run again, but you don't want to.
you want something more. you want something a little rough, something a little sharp. you want something to tell you that a little blood is good sometimes. that answering blood with a little more blood was exactly how it should be. that we don't have to be docile, to back down. you want to be told that it's okay to bite.
there is something wrong with you.
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Minors DNI 🔞 This is some depraved, freaky deaky shit.. Literally just porn without plot, because I love me some mean Kiri — anyways, come get ya juice!
You were practically panting out your moans, breath fogging up part of your reflection as his hands pawed at your chest. The fabric of your shirt bunched around your collarbone, and the cups of your bra haphazardly folded down to reveal your breasts while he fucked himself into you from behind. His pace merciless, fat cock bullying its way in, and it felt all too delicious with the feeling of his crimson gaze watching you bounce in the mirror.
Your hips are digging into the ceramic edge of the sink, making you push your ass back into him just to escape the sharp sensation of it. The sound of his skin against yours, and the indecent squelch of your weeping hole was setting your skin alight. Maybe thats why you couldn’t stop the sounds from escaping you, eyes lulling back at the way he knew all the spots to make you feel so fucking good.
The feeling of his big, manly hand on your throat brings you back to reality. Your upper half pulled back into him, pressing the entirety of your back flush against his chest while he rails you. Pins you in place with sheer strength. The new depth makes you yelp, letting out mumbled ramblings about his cock being too big.
“You can take it.” he’s nodding at you in the reflection, eyebrows drooping in faux pity as he flashes you that shark tooth grin. “You can fucking take it for me, angel.”
Tongue starting to loosen with your approaching bliss, you can’t stop yourself from nodding along. Delirious on that dick. That familiar coil was winding in your belly, burning hotter by the second until you were cumming around him hard enough to make him stall his hips with a drawn out groan of approval.
It was too good, too much.
The tears rise up, a glistening threat at your lash line as he starts a pace of hard, deliberate thrusts. “Eijiii~.. fuck!” a feral noise tears out of your throat, starlight twinkling and fizzing at the edges of your vision. “s’too much!”
The redhead dips his head back, and laughs at that - so full of jovial warmth and venom. “Awww..” he tuts, a mocking sound, tongue pressed to his teeth as one hand slides from your throat to hold your jaw, the other landing a sharp smack to your ass. “No tears, baby.. nuh uh~..”
“You don’t want our friends to know what a nasty fucking girl you are, do you? Huh, pretty baby?”
He was getting close, balls heavy and aching to do the only thing on his mind. To fill you up, and send you back to the table of your friends as it leaks out of your tired little hole.
“Gonna have to make up some excuse for why that makeup is all over your face..” he moaned, smiling mirthfully as your sloppy cunt grips down at his words, earning you another swat to the ass. Fucking into you with the primal dedication that nature intended, he’s wrapping a thick arm around your neck to hold you in a loose chokehold. Depraved, and unrelenting as he crushed you against the sink with his weight. “You’re such a bad girl, baby. I can feel that pussy milking me, fuck..”
You thanked your lucky stars that the music from the party was hiding your moans, incoherently raving about how good he was fucking you, because you were far too gone to control yourself.
Scattering wet kisses along the side of your face, sloppy and hot with the feeling of his breath, he flexes that strong bicep slightly to give your neck just enough pressure. Just enough that you have to gasp a bit for each breath, soft lips brushing against your ear as he spoke.
“You love the idea of everyone knowing who owns you, don’t you, honey? Whose pussy is this?”
His thoughts run rampant at his own words, chasing that high as he uses his weight to keep you from wriggling free. Pressing himself all the way into you, grinding against your cervix with slow, decisive thrusts as he lets out a whining growl. You can barely think as he runs the rough pads of his fingers along your thigh with his free hand, enunciating his question by circling your clit until you’re both coming undone.
“It’s yours. Always yours.”
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charliemwrites · 9 months
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Woof woof… whimper
(Part 10… but technically a continuation of part 9)
Content: Dub-Con/Non-Con, Knotting
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It takes your cock-addled brain a second too long to process what Soap’s just said. What he’s implied. And by then he’s all ready for you to buck against him, confused and angry.
“That’s so — that’s not funny!” You shout.
But he’s got you pinned thoroughly, your chest flat against the mattress and your ass flush against his hips. His cock buried so deep you can feel the hot head of it bullying the deepest parts of you. All your struggling does is make you clench up tight around him, makes him feel that much bigger and meaner inside you. Makes him grunt low and ragged in your ear, all animal appreciation.
“I’m not laughin’,” he replies, nipping at your shoulder.
“G-get off of me, get out, get—”
His hand slides into your hair again, gets a firm hold at the roots and presses your face into the blankets, muffling your protests. Shushes you like soothing a panicked animal.
“Now, now,” he chides, “I still gotta prove I’m not compensating, don’t I?”
You suck in a breath, squeezing your eyes shut. There have to be a million explanations other than the absolutely ludicrous one he’s just presented to you. Cameras, microphones….
How did he know where you live?
How did he know where the spare key was?
How did he know where your bedroom was?
How did he find you at the bar?
Stalker, you tell yourself. He’s a creep, you’ve always known that.
Then where’s your dog?
“N-no,” you warble, bucking again. Nearly scream as his cock twitches inside you; only reason you don’t is because you can barely breathe as it is. He’s so deep inside that he’s practically in your lungs. “No way you’re my — there’s no way. You’re crazy. I’m gonna— ah!”
He draws out as you speak, gradual, and then plunges in again all at once, cutting you off. Grinds his hips in a dirty circle too, burying himself as deep as he can.
“Aww, poor thing,” he coos. “S’alright, baby, I knew this would happen. We jus’ gotta get all those big, scary feelings out first. Then I can explain it all nice and slow.”
You try to scream at him. Try to curse him out, tell him there’s no way in hell you’re listening to a word he says now; never mind letting him spend another second with his dick in you.
All that comes out is a high-pitched keen as he starts fucking you without further preamble. It aches, but you can’t tell in what way. If it hurts, if it’s the best you’ve ever had. Both? Your nerves feel haywire, brain dragged to lust-stupid depths.
“See, there we go,” he rasps, punctuating with a sharp snap of his hips on that last word. “My perfect little mate. Your cunt was made for my cock, made to be bred by me. Isn’t that right?”
You try to shake your head, but his grip keeps you from doing more than sending electricity down your spine, hair pulled taut.
“Yeah it fucking is,” he growls to his own question, canting your hips back further. His fingers grip cruelly into the flesh, sure to leave bruises. You wish you didn’t enjoy the sensation, wish it didn’t make you spasm around him helplessly.
“‘Bout time I owned you right back, don’t you think?” He continues, never stopping or even slowing. You yelp as he tugs your necklace again, arching your back at a steep angle. “Even collared yourself up for me. All it needs is my name.”
Something about that drives some awful, slutty part of your brain fucking wild. The idea of you with a tight leather choker — a collar — with his name (you don’t think about what name) hanging from your throat…
“Like that, don’t you?” He chuckles meanly. “Who’s my good little slut? Who’s my perfect, soaked little breeding whore?”
Tears spring to your eyes as you realize the “I am” is right there on the tip of your over-saturated tongue. If you had air, brain cells, any ability at all, you’d be crying it to the ceiling like the toy he’s treating you as.
He’s going to ruin you, you think. He’s going to fuck you broken. You’re crying and wailing on his cock, think you’d actually throw a tantrum if he pulled out and left you on the edge right now. Would, you realize in horror, beg for him to keep going.
And then he snakes his hand around your hip and starts rubbing your clit — fast, hard little circles. Just the way you like; the way you’d do it yourself. Relentlessly and cruel, even when you try to writhe away from how fast you can feel yourself getting to the edge. Almost frightened by it, how quickly he’s mastered your body’s pleasure.
Frightened by the extra stimulation at your entrance, too. A little extra friction at first — shocking because you’re leaving a puddle on the sheets. But then the friction becomes pressure, becomes… more.
“W-wha….?” You slur, hips wriggling.
Soap (Johnny?) snarls in your ear and that feeling at your entrance grows. Feels, you realize with alarm, like stretching.
“Gonnae take my knot so well,” he rambles, accent thick like syrup, trickling into your empty brain, filling you up with meaningless sounds. “Plug you up full of my cum, breed you right just like you need.”
Any questions or confusion are whisked away by the extra stimulation at your entrance. The sensitive nerves getting just as much brutal attention as your inner walls, your cervix, that sweet spot inside you that makes your eyes roll back.
It all becomes too much all at once and crashes through you, devastating. You clamp down around him tight and needy, lean all your weight back into his thighs. And he practically howls as he sinks into you and stays, grinding and humping without ever actually pulling out again. You feel a flood of heat that seems to go on for an absurdly long time, cock pulsing against your overstimulated walls, milked for every last drop.
You shudder as your brain tries and fails to process it all. Like trying to decipher a foreign language from white noise. It’s nothing but static to you.
You can feel a tongue against your shoulder, scraped of blunt teeth. Soap/Johnny licking the sweat from your skin and nipping bruises into the flesh. You make an annoyed noise that comes out whinier than intended, shoving at his face.
“Get off, you bastard.” Your voice is pathetic, thick with tears and fractured in a hundred places.
“Can’t, bonnie, even if I wanted to.”
You scowl, try to look at him over your shoulder. He takes that opportunity to nuzzle against your temple.
“What?” You ask. “What are you talking about?”
“Did ye hear me?” He chuckles. “Well, maybe not with the way you were screamin’. You’re all knotted up, baby. Can’t pull out — ‘less you want this pretty pussy to tear.”
You jolt, nearly yank yourself off out of pure fear, but Johnny keeps you still again, humming.
“Easy now,” he croons. “Still fussy? Need another to settle down?”
Useless as your brain may be, it recognizes what he means by “another one.” You think you might pass out.
“No,” you snap, petulant even to your own ears. “I want you to explain… explain everything.”
“Alright, hen. C’mere.”
He gently lays you out prone on the bed, then rolls you both on your sides. Hitches your leg up over his hip. You want to protest, but it helps the ache in your poor cunt.
“H-how are you still hard?” You pant, traitorous pussy twitching around him.
He growls in your ear, can feel him grinning against the lobe. “Will stay that way for a bit, lass. Don’ worry, you jus’ have to lay here all nice and still. Keep me warm while I explain things to you.”
And he does. How there are shapeshifters out there in the world, rare as they are. That he comes from a line of them. Recruited to military, as most of them are.
How he was on standard patrol when he smelled you for the first time.
“Like a wet dream, bonnie. Fertile. Spring. Smelled like mine.”
How he instantly knew you were his mate. That he just needed to make you see it. Never a good time to explain it all to you — and then there were interlopers and your silly little books and your pesky toys. How he tried to drop hints around the house, let you come to the correct conclusion on your own. But you never did.
“Honestly it’s a good thing I’m here, hen. You’re so oblivious. Lived with a man and never even knew it.”
That he tried to go about it the other way ‘round, as a man, but you’re just so stubborn. And then how it all led up to tonight. To you finally, finally realizing what you really needed: your mate.
You should be angry, furious. There’s a lot to say about… well, all of it. It’s horrifying and violating and… and…
And he hasn’t stopped bullying your clit since he started talking. Cruel, tight circles. Drawing the hood back with two fingers and stroke with a third, slow and languid and just soft enough to make your head spin. Rhythmless taps. Even pinches when you try to chew him out at one point, half turning to scowl. Instead have his tongue lapping sloppily at yours as your mouth gapes open soundlessly.
Makes you cum twice just like that without ever interrupting his own story, cock still hilted — knotted deep inside you. Honestly, you probably miss a good portion of it, some of the finger details for sure. But you get the broad strokes (among other strokes).
He licks at your overstimulated tears when he’s finished, nuzzling and kissing your cheek.
“I-I miss my dog,” you mumble finally, hands balled against your chest.
“Aww, darlin’,” he sighs, sounding genuinely apologetic. “We’re one and the same. I’m always your boy no matter what form I take.”
It would be more comforting if his dick didn’t throb calling himself your boy.
“‘Sides, I’m better than a normal mutt,” he continues, tugging you against his chest. You want to hate that is instantly makes you feel a little better. “Wolves mate for life, after all.”
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sordidmusings · 11 months
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Let Go and Grip Me Tighter
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Moot request! Mihawk struggles with guilt from the nature of his fantasies about you and begins pulling away. You won't let that happen.
A/N: Omfg this one was cooking for awhile but it's finally ready. It starts with some angst (living without sex ed or resources on that causes Problems) but then there's like a lot of smut then a quick wind down with some aftercare! Has some “Closer” by Nine Inch Nails vibes 💀
Word Count: 9.3 k
Warnings: afab!reader, fem!reader, NSFW all over the place, dom!Mihawk, sub!reader, edging, overstimulation, spanking, praise, degradation, biting, marking, rough treatment, claiming, prone bone, missionary, creampie, manhandling, established relationship, Mihawk is very deeply in love with you and struggles with wanting to be a strict dom, he gets condescending 👌🏻, Mihawk orders you around, miscommunication angst up front
~ ~ ~ ••• ✦✦✦ ••• ~ ~ ~
More than anything else, Mihawk was certain that the depths of his guilt were vast enough to have the breadth of the seas shrink to a mere droplet in their stead. He loves you so, so much, but his mind has been tormenting with thoughts he feels unforgivable. It started small; his fantasies of you started to latch onto that whiny, pathetic moan you’d let out when he grabbed you a bit too hard. He began to imagine himself purposefully digging his hands into you to leave bruises there, which then turned to smacking handprints into your skin. The thought of your ass red and bouncing with each hit had him cumming faster than he’d like to admit the first time it played behind his eyelids.
He began to get used to those ideas and started to get a little more… creative.  What would your neck and shoulders look like littered in bruises and bite marks? Would your moans be as whiny and pathetic if he tied your hands and feet to the corners of the bed, leaving you with no option but to struggle and beg? Maybe he could just tie your hands behind your back and use his grip on the rope to pull you back to him harder on each thrust. Maybe he’d grab you and move you around as he liked, overpowering any attempts to move on your own and eating up the high-pitched whines from the force. He’d hold you down and fuck you until any unease became begging, and begging became “too much!”.
Mihawk felt a feral place in his heart burn every time he spit filthy words at you in his dreams. Tucked away in his nightly unconscious entanglements, he claimed you as his whore, his cocksleeve, his slutty little love. Many claims came and went but they were always possessive and you were always perfect, just as you were in his waking life. The heart that held such devoted and worshiping love for you ached at the idea of calling you such insults, but they set his cock aching just as greatly and he felt as if he was splitting in two.
How could he want to treat you in such a way? Mihawk loves you. He loves you and you love him and you always treat him with ceaseless care and support and he repays you by cumming to the thought of hurting you? Would you run from him if you found out? You knew the power he held; you’d helped him wash off the stains of those foolish enough to challenge him many times. Surely you would flee if you knew that the wielder of such power held ill intent towards you.
No - ill intent wasn’t right. He couldn’t hold ill intent towards you if he tried. So what was this then? He didn’t want to hurt you but he wanted you to enjoy being hurt by him. He wanted you at his whims as far as he could press before any real damage could happen. He wanted to come at you, teeth bared against your throat, and have you respond by offering your jugular. He wanted you to take pleasure in being moved and taken by his charge. That was it then - he wanted to own and control. To dominate. But how could he ask that of you if it required such beastly treatment?
~ ~ ~ ••• ✦✦✦ ••• ~ ~ ~
Mihawk’s hands on you have felt different. Normally, you could feel their comforting weight resting on your body or their firm press, born of the need to keep you held tight. You are still held but more by the will of gravity than Mihawk himself. Laying half draped over his body, as you are now, is one of your favorite ways to end the day. The unfamiliarity of his hands, though, will not let you find rest. Where is the sweet indulgence of fingers threading through your hair and scratching gently at your scalp? Where is the healing service of kneading fingertips releasing you from the aches of the day? Where is the steadfast protection of the grounding hold anchored to your hip?
In place of these daily devotions are the hesitant, whispering touches of a man you’ve never known. Your Mihawk has always been sure in his movements. That was certain from the very first touch - a tender grip on your fingers and lips at your knuckles, then a quick flip of his wrist so that lips could move to warm the inside of your wrist. Your Mihawk doesn’t know how to falter. He can wait and assess and test but none of that encompasses the way he shifts to shy away from your seeking touch. It happens incredibly slowly to hide from your notice, but you need his touch too much to overlook its retreat. Your body and heart take to it like roots to water, always reached out and ready to soak in the vitality it brings.
You lay and continue to wonder fruitlessly at the nature of the trailing fingertips moving from your shoulder to your elbow. The endless circling thoughts are wearing at you, and you snuggle your cheek further into his chest for comfort. At the feeling of his meager caress stuttering in response, you resolve to find and fix the problem immediately.
Lifting your head up, you seek Mihawk’s gaze. His head remains tilted away and his eyes remain shut despite the fact that he can definitely feel you staring at him. After giving him a few moments to do it on his own, you bring a hand to his chin and guide him to face you. You delicately trace the lines of his facial hair, which look extra sharp in the shadows cast by the warm lamplight. He opens his honey yellow eyes and circles them all around your face. He meets your gaze last.
“You’re hiding from me.” You state it as what you know it is; a fact.
“I do not hide-”
“Yes, you do,” you interrupt. “Every time you’re afraid to talk about something, you live in that head of yours.” You shift your hand to cradle his jaw, brushing your thumb lovingly across his cheek. “But, you’ve never pulled your presence from me too. You know we always figure it out, love. What has you like this?”
Mihawk closes his eyes again. Your answer is kept somewhere behind those lids. You wait for it to appear, but it seems less likely to happen with each passing second. 
“I miss you,” you whisper. The little warble that snuck into your voice twisted the pit in Mihawk’s chest. His eyes open to mirror the concern roiling in your own.
“I’m right here,” he says, finally using his hold to press your body into him. The gesture pleases you but not enough to distract you from the way his words weren’t reassuring; they were begging to be believed. You let him have some time to try and let his eyes speak to you when he could not. Deliberately deep and measured breaths set rhythm for the way his chest floats you like calm waves beneath a ship. Taking in his unspoken cues, you could only understand that he was putting in great effort to hold something back. The conflict you felt in him between the need to shield you and the need to comfort you set you on edge. What could he hold in himself that he thinks so catastrophic? What does he know that could cause you such harm?
“Mihawk, please,” you beg. Your plea works against you; his eyes and grip harden.
“No.” Mihawk maneuvers you off of himself and moves to get up. You chase right after him, trailing rumpled sheets behind you. He makes it two steps from your shared bed before you catch him, locking your arms around his waist. You burrow your face into the warm skin between his shoulder blades and press your body as close to him as you can, clinging desperately. He remains silent but his hands move to your wrists in warning.
“Don’t run from me,” you plead, throat tight to hold back the whimpers starting to build in your lungs. He’s never left you during an argument - he had said it’s because he couldn’t stand to leave you upset. This sudden change leaves you shaken, holding tight to him in the hope that he is still your greatest stability and comfort. He begins pulling your arms away. The distress you feel lets him.
Mihawk at least turns around to see the damage he has caused. You see his regret in wet eyes, bowed head, and caving shoulders. Contrition compels him to rub circles on the wrist he still holds and the affectionate gesture pulls the first tear from your eyes. He begins reaching to brush it away but instead pulls back, his hand curling into a fist at his side. In a quick burst of anger, you snatch that hand and push it to your face. You hold it there even after it opens to embrace your cheek, scared it’ll leave you again. Mihawk hates the tears wetting his thumb and the shakiness of your breath, feeling the weight of his guilt become unbearable in their stead. He shrinks into himself even further from the way your eyes have narrowed in accusation.
“Have I ever given you a reason not to trust me with your problems?” You bite out at him. He can no longer look at you, choosing to gaze unseeing at the floor instead. 
“No,” he mumbles like a child facing the rage from authority.
“Then what is wrong?” You press, voice turning from vicious to exasperated. “Whatever it is, I’m here for you. I love you, Mihawk, that won’t change! And I can help-”
“No you can’t!” He roars, snapping his head back up to bare his teeth at you. “You can’t help me! Not with this.”
Wide wet eyes stare back at him, shaken of their fight. Your lips tremble around stuttering breaths and his own angry breath puffs out into the small space between you. They’re all you can hear while you try to process his anger and the way his fingers begin to sink onto your wrist and jaw like claws. 
“I-I’m sorry,” you say, trying to get things back under control. “I shouldn’t have pressed so hard when you weren’t ready.” Mihawk scrunches his eyes shut and bears his teeth again.
“No. You don’t understand,” he starts. A deep breath flushes his whole body and rattles him on the way out. He’s staring right into you again. “I want to hurt you.”
Confusion strikes you before fear has a chance. “What?”
Both of Mihawk's hands are now cradling your face, and the pressure of his fingertips betrays the controlling nature of his hold. He steps in close so your bodies just barely brush and he looms his head and shoulders into your space. His golden eyes burn molten, looking down on you.
“I want to hurt you,” MIhawk repeats, beginning to stalk forward to force you backwards. “I want to grip you ‘til you bruise, bite and leave marks.” You simply listen and follow as he speaks and the relief of releasing his fantasies has the confessions rushing out of him. “I want to force you down and fuck you so hard you scream.” Your calves hit the bed and you sit down on it when his hands continue leading you back. Your easy compliance has his mind blurry and spinning, now beyond his own will. 
“I want to control your breath.” One hand clamps down next to your neck, shoving you quickly onto your back. Mihawk’s thumb presses threateningly into the base of your throat, not enough to halt your breath but enough for your veins to pound back against it. “I want to bend you over and watch your flesh tremble and burn red while I strike you.” His knees spread your legs wide, before he lifts one knee onto the bed, forcing your leg up with him. “I want to tie you like a captive and fuck you while you’re bound and have to take it.” His other knee is on the bed, making your other leg open up for him too. He’s hovering over you, letting some of his weight bleed into the grip beside your neck before releasing it. The hand moves to dig into your upper arm. Mihawk crawls forward into the middle of the bed, using that grip and his shoving thighs to drag you with him. “I want to own and command you.” 
You have never felt so small and exposed and it’s sending an addictive thrill through you. Your heart is pumping bubbling adrenaline through your veins, most of it moving to boil between your hips. Looking up at the fierceness of Mihawk is bringing back temptations you had locked away long ago. Your hands move to fist into your own shirt, too unsure to touch him but needing to hold onto something.
Despite his rough grip, the way Mihawk bends down to brush his forehead against yours is reverent. “I want you to let me touch you however I want, fuck you until I’ve had my fill, until neither of us can move.” His eyes close and his hold softens and his nose nudges yours. His breath is soft against your lips, smelling sweetly of the wine you shared over dessert. His voice loses its power and creaks with defeat. “I want to do so many awful things to you, but you’re my love - my life.”
You tilt your chin up to press a soft kiss against his lips. Mihawk stays still, simply letting you mold your lips to his, until his resolve breaks and he’s lunging forward to kiss you ravenously. He’s in immediate control of the kiss, needing to take everything he can from you while you’re still willing to love him. His hand moves to the side of your head, helping guide you to follow his frantic movements. You’re immediately lost in the heat of his touch and tongue, relieved to receive his affections again. Needing to feel more of him, you brush your thighs against his, your skin sliding easily against his silk sleep pants. When your thighs make it over his hips and you feel the muscles of his sides tickling the insides of your knees, you hook your legs around him. He fights you when you try to pull him down.
“Dear heart,” Mihawk manages to say between tasting you, “I should not.”
“You should,” you gasp back against his lips. Your kissing has grown to match his in hunger, filling him with joy and guilt. Another light squeeze of your legs fails to bring him down to you. This time he pulls away to look at you, eyes shining with conflict.
“I do not deserve-” You cut him off by using the strength of your legs to pull your hips up to meet his. The thin silk he wears does nothing to hide the shape and warmth of his hard cock. You earn a low moan from him when you grind against it. Trying not to fold to your temptations, Mihawk keeps on his hands and knees while you hang off of him.
“I want you,” you assert, “And you want me.” You grind along his whole length to emphasize your point. Your thighs burn with the effort, but the way his eyes flutter at the bliss makes it worth it. “And I-” you pause and swallow, stealing yourself. “I want all that too.”
“What?” Mihawk asks urgently. He grabs your chin, keeping you centered on him.
“I want all of that stuff too,” you say, letting yourself fall from him and back to the comfort of the mattress. He’s still staring at you with the unreadable, analytical face he usually saves for opponents, so you elaborate. “Your control. You own my heart, why not the rest of me?”
“And the harm?” he prompts bitterly. Not wanting him to pull away, you smooth your hands into his hair and massage at his scalp, trapping him to you in the gentlest way possible.
“That too,” you admit quietly. Your body flushes hot again, but this time with shame. “There were times when I would see your fierceness in battle and find myself more attracted than I should be. The first year we were together it was unbearable and I would fantasize about what it would be like to feel the force of your strength and will on me.”  Mihawk’s breath halts and his face slackens. His hand releases your chin to brush fingertips across your cheek in awe. “I’d dream of you throwing me around, commanding me, punishing me. I got myself to stop over time because wanting something like that? I mean, there must be something wrong with me.”
“Never,” Mihawk growls. “You’re perfect.”
He descends on you and all you know of the world shrinks down to only Mihawk. Grasping hands rove over the both of you, pulling at hair and clothes and flesh. This time his hips are chasing yours, lighting your nerves on fire at the pressure of his grinds sinking your hips into the mattress. Your canting moans are muffled by his lips and tongue, but he hears them all the same and feasts on them greedily. One of his hands finds its home at the back of your head, fisted into your hair. You let out a high whine when he pulls back and holds you still.
“You will tell me if I do something you don’t like,” Mihawk commands. Unable to speak with the way the head of his dick is teasing your clit, you nod your head. “Words,” he growls, tightening his grip on your hair.
“Yes, my lord!” you answer, half gasping, half moaning. The pull on your hair relents and his fingers massage your scalp, soothing it.
“And you will tell me to stop if it becomes too much,” he continues, watching your face intently to make sure you’re truly hearing him and understanding what you’re agreeing to. He also needs to soak you in to make sure this is real, that you really want this. You focus in on the violent yellow of his eyes, taking in the seriousness and desperation you see in them.
“Yes, my lord,” you breathe out. 
His lips cheat you of your next breath, but you don’t have the will to care. Everything of yours is his anyway. You’re just relaxing into the kiss when he’s pulling away to sit up. 
“Get off the bed,” he orders. You only hesitate a moment before crawling your way to the foot of the bed and standing up from it. You turn to look at him for more direction, hands fiddling with the hem of your shirt while you wait. The way his eyes roam over you, assessing you, does little for your nerves; you feel like an unprepared student. 
Mihawk turns and gets up from the side of the bed. He prowls over to you, taking his time to unsettle you further. The way his tall form slinks over to you treats you to a show of the shapes of his sloped muscles cutting lines across his body. His Adonis belt in particular catches your attention, on full display by the low rise of his pants. You shudder in anticipation when you follow those lines to the large bulge between them. It keeps your attention until he is stopped in front of you and you trail your gaze up to meet his neutral face. You know him well enough to notice the desire darkening his eyes. He leans his upper body forward, forcing you to crane your head back to maintain eye contact.
“Undress me.”
You fall to your knees, looking up at him while you sneak your fingers into his waistband. Slowly, you lower his pants down his thighs. You miss the way his cock bobs in front of your face when it’s freed, unable to look away from his eyes staring into your own. You let the pants fall when you reach his knees and place your hands on his warm thighs. Still looking to him, you begin smoothing your hands up his legs. Feeling emboldened by touching him, you look down to take in his length. While Mihawk may look unaffected, the truth shows in the flushed and leaking cock in front of you. A thick vein on the underside tempts you to lick it, but when you lean forward a punishing hand holds you by the hair. 
“I didn’t give you permission,” Mihawk warns. The way you look up at him with big contrite eyes has his cock twitching but does nothing to change his resolve.
“I’m sorry, my lord.” You get no response except his hand petting down your head and gently cupping your cheek. He leaves you waiting a few breaths while his palm warms your cheek and your eyes soften his.
“Undress yourself.”
Your hands drift slowly from his hips to the hem of your shirt. In a smooth motion you lift it over your head, only losing eye contact when there’s fabric between the two of you, and lay it on the floor next to you. Your thumbs hook into your underwear, holding their position while you stand up to rid yourself of them. Despite your nudity, his eyes stick to your own.
“Back on the bed.”
Mihawk watches you while you crawl onto the mattress, enraptured by the way your ass sways back and forth as you move. The teasing peaks he gets of your pussy as you move test his resolve to take his time commanding you before he sinks into you. When you get to the head of the bed he notices you hesitate, staying still on hands and knees before peeking over your shoulder for direction. The way you look to him, pleading for guidance, has his heart pounding and his mind running feral. He reels it in with a slow breath.
“On your back. You need to be able to look at me for now.” You follow his command, ending up propped on your elbows with your bent legs acting as a barrier between you two. Mihawk has seen you naked almost daily for a handful of years, but you find yourself feeling shy and exposed. This is a deep fantasy finally coming to fruition for the both of you, and what if the real you doesn’t measure up?
“Spread yourself.” You shiver at the command, absolutely dripping from the hunger rumbling in his voice. You look down to your knees and falter, worrying at being completely exposed to his voracious gaze.
“Precious,” he calls, bringing your eyes back up to him. His face is still stern but there is a touch of gentleness in his voice when he softly prompts, “Go on.”
Choosing to focus on your most beloved yellow to ground yourself, you slowly spread your legs apart. They end up in a wide v, still propped bent with your feet planted in the soft sheets. 
“Good girl,” he purrs. Mihawk takes his time admiring the curves of your spread legs before he can no longer keep his gaze from your exposed cunt. He admires those curves and lines too and is flooded with delicious memories of having his face stuffed there. Fresh heat washes from his chest to his cock, and he has to swallow from the way his mouth waters. 
Your previous worries leave you when you see how Mihawk looks at you. He’s a man possessed, taken and corrupted in the face of immeasurable riches. You see the men of myth, who scheme and steal under the noses of angry gods, in his face. That look of his snaps up to your face and you turn into prey. You love the way it has you feeling so alive.
Mihawk finally makes his way over to you. He takes his time, letting you feel each shift in the mattress from the weight of his limbs. It gives you time to feel smaller and smaller as he overtakes you, overwhelming you as his broad shoulders get higher and higher over your body, enclosing you between him and the bed. Strong arms plant themselves on each side of your head, caging you into his dark gaze. His handsome face, haloed by dark curls, looks striking in the dim lamplight, his sharp features casting shadows across pale skin. You can’t resist the call to reach up and caress him. 
“Did I say you could touch me yet?” Mihawk growls, snatching each of your hands from his face. The threat in his tone and the forceful grip squeezing your wrists has bright adrenalin bursting in your chest and tingling in your limbs. He presses your hands down in the sheets next to your hips and releases them as he tells you, “Lay on them.”
Hesitantly, you arch your back and clasp your hands together in the new gap. When you lower onto them, you scrunch your nose at the uncomfortable feeling of your knuckles rubbing into your spine. Mihawk notices and gives you a disapproving look. He places a spread hand on your stomach and presses down, making your knuckles and spine roll over each other. He keeps some pressure there; a reminder of your disobedience.
Your hands grip hard into each other when Mihawk finally lowers his hips flush to yours. The feeling of hot skin is such a relief to your frazzled nerves and pleading pussy. His dick fits perfectly within your folds, rubbing deliciously through them as he ruts against you. There’s no distracting pinch or catch; you’re wet enough to cover him and spread over any skin he touches. A shiver shakes up Mihawk’s spine at the feeling of you clenching around nothing against the base of his cock. He’s treated to the sweet sounds of your whimpers and moans, pulling especially delightful ones from you each time he angles to circle more firmly around your clit.
“Please, sir,” you whine, “I need you inside me.”
“Such a greedy whore,” Mihawk chides, tone so condescending it almost sounds bored. You whimper back to him, but he catches the way your hips twitch and press more firmly to him. He takes pity on you and gives in to his own needs to feel you around him.
Mihawk is big but it was never a problem because he enjoyed taking his time when pleasing you, so the prepping happened naturally by the time he was ready to make his way inside you. Today though, Mihawk finds himself overcome with the need to force you open when he shoves two fingers in and feels you clenching tight around them. He spreads those long fingers to press against your plush wet flesh and keeps pressing as he slides them back out. His fingers move to hold his cock, which is soaked from grinding into you and the precum he’d been uncontrollably leaking, and line him up with your entrance. He starts pushing into you immediately, groaning at how you clamp down tight in surprise. 
The way your breath hiccups as he keeps inching his way into you has his mind spinning. He bites into his cheek to keep himself from bottoming out in one brutal thrust; he wants to feel every flutter and twitch of your cunt and body as they try to accommodate him. He needs you to feel every second of him taking ownership of your body, needs you to feel how much more powerful he is. Wet fingers dig into the meat of your hip as he tries to hold himself back. You feel the sweet mix of the smooth slide of every ridge on his cock playing at your nerves and the burn of your muscles stretching almost too far. You surrender fully to your trust in him, releasing all tension from your muscles and all thoughts from your head. 
“Much better,” Mihawk breathes against your lips. He stares deep into your eyes and watches them become fully dilated and hazy. You stare right back and give him a lethargic smile for the praise. The rush of giving up control while he takes your body leaves your brain and body feeling like liquid. You almost move to touch him again, but his words are the only things still held in your mind.
Mihawk pulls back slowly, treasuring the way your body tries to suck him back in. You get halfway through an inhale before a quick thrust knocks all the air from your lungs. The satisfying clap of his hips on your ass ricochets through you. You get a chance to breathe when he stays deep in you and circles his hips to feel every inch and detail of your pulsing cunt. Overwhelmed, you whimper, “Mihawk-”
“Not my name,” he snaps. His hand flies up to your mouth and shoves two fingers in, pressing the taste of yourself into your tongue. You suck on them, looking up with apologetic eyes, hoping to placate him. It doesn’t work. “And to think I was giving you time to adjust.”
That’s all the warning you get before he sets a rough pace, each impact bouncing through your body, shaking your thighs, hips, and breasts. You shut your eyes against the onslaught, each nerve screaming its pleasure at you loudly. You feel unbearably full of Mihawk but also unable to feel enough of him. You need him in your hands, on your tongue, ringing in your ears, pulling you apart. The closest you can do now is tilt your hips up to feel him even deeper and offer more room for his hips to rub your skin at the end of each thrust.
When he feels your thighs squeeze tight to his waist, Mihawk falls to his elbows under the instinct to curl into you. With frenzied motions, he readjusts his forearms to be beside your chest, pressing your upper arms into your ribs. His hands clamp down on your shoulders, keeping you trapped against each pound of his thick cock into you. His claim on you flushes through your veins and seeps into your bones. Your mouth, now free, hangs open to pant and moan for him. His forehead presses to your temple so he can feel your breath deliver each sound directly to his ear, persuading him further and further from sanity. His lips hovering so close to you lets you hear his own harsh breath and hushed groans. 
“My lord, sir, please,” you beg, needing more from him but too lost to say how. You know he’ll figure out what you need, he’ll take care of you, push you as far as you can go before you snap and become pure pleasure. 
“Fuck, treasure,” Mihawk moans, hot breath tingling on your neck, “just be my good cocksleeve - lay there and take it.”
He switches his rhythm, starting to pull out slower to draw out his time in the grip of your cunt. Each push into you is still punishing, taking advantage of his curve to shove the head of his dick across your g spot. The steady hammering has pressure building between your hips quickly. “Sir -hah- I’m so -nngaaaah- ‘s so good I’m -hahnn- my lord -aah-” you continue babbling pleading nonsense to him, trying to let him know how close you are.
Mihawk can tell even without you senseless moaning; your thighs have begun to tremble and jump and you get impossibly tighter with each thrust and he’s sure he’s found heaven in your cunt. His face buries in your neck, sucking harshly at your delicate skin and savoring the light flavor of salt on his tongue. His teeth begin to come into play, worrying against little sections of your neck, mixing a sweet sting into the flurry of pleasure surging to your head. He feels you tip your hips away from him and wiggle in his grip, trying to hold off your orgasm so you can cum when he does and he hates it. 
“Don’t run from me,” he snarls, snapping his right hand to grip the back of your neck. You obey immediately, but sob out at the overwhelming pressure pulsing behind your clit. The sound has Mihawk’s balls pulling tight and his cock pulsing but he’s chasing your orgasm, not his. He wants to feel the violence of it being forced out of you. His left hand moves down your back, fingers dug deep into muscle the whole way, and covers your clasped hands with his own. Mihawk licks up the side of your neck to nibble your earlobe. His tone is biting when he taunts, “Cumming already little whore?” and you’re gone.
He manages to keep his pace through your orgasm, each press of his cock making another wave of bliss crash through you. High moans knock from you in time with his hips, but you're deaf to them from the buzzing between your ears. His cock twitches hard in the threat of release, and he bites down meanly into the meat of your shoulder to muscle his way through it. The feeling of you trapped beneath him, legs clinging to him in desperation while you cum is better than any of his fantasies have granted. Through your settling fog, you feel deep moans vibrating into your shoulder through Mihawk’s teeth.
“Thank you, sir,” you rasp, “feels so good.” Teeth release from your shoulder and thrusts become circling grinds.
“Ah but you were supposed to be making me feel good, weren’t you?” Mihawk chides. He licks his burning hot tongue over his bite mark, pleased with how deep the indents are.
“Sorry, my lord,” you whine pathetically, “I couldn’t -hahn- couldn’t help myself.”
Mihawk turns to nip at your jaw before hovering his face above yours. His piercing eyes narrow down at you as he mocks, “Oh, poor you.”
He’s detaching from you, getting up onto hands and knees, leaving you empty. Your eyes widen in panic and you almost reach for him. Instead, all you can do is whimper at him while he pulls your legs from around his waist and hope your sad eyes will entice him back. Mihawk takes them in with a twinge of remorse, but mostly they send arousal shooting through him. At first, he thought of rewarding you for keeping your hands still and letting your legs go limp while he maneuvered them, but he wanted to push you more first.
“Flip over. Chest down, ass up.”
You blink twice to process his words then get to work. Your movements are sluggish and sloppy, your muscles still recovering from your orgasm. Seeing how weak you’ve become from his touch has Mihawk resisting the urge to surge at you again. The sway of your movements causes your ass to wag in front of him and he’s glad you can’t see the way his jaw slackens at the sight. You look divine - no, more like sin incarnate. Your lax muscles cause your upper body to sag fully into the bed, making your ass arch obscenely high in the air. Your tired face is buried in your arms and the sheets. The display has his mouth watering and he can hardly tear his eyes away from your glistening pussy peeking out between your thighs.
“So perfect,” Mihawk purrs, reaching a hand out to touch you. You jump slightly at the first touch then relax into it, humming appreciatively. He massages his thumbs into the curve where your ass meets your thighs. When you ease into that touch, gently swaying with the oscillating pressure, he slides his large palms onto your skin. For a short while, he simply takes greedy handfuls of you, switching and shifting his grip so that every bit of your ass and hips have been squeezed. Your lax body continues to follow his hands as his lovely marionette.
“Since you’ve forgotten the one reason you’re in my bed, I’ll have to take my pleasure from your punishment instead,” Mihawk drawls. He wastes no time delivering the first smack onto the thickest part of your ass. You jolt with it even though it was barely a fraction of his strength, just barely enough to sting.  The warmth of his palm settling over the sparking skin soothes any hurt into pleasant tingles. You’re beginning to mourn the fading of the feeling when his opposite hand strikes your other cheek just as hard. This time you gasp and arch your ass higher, forcing Mihawk to take a deep breath to keep his steady pace.
“Careful now or I might think you’re enjoying this,” Mihawk chastises. Beneath his flat tone, he’s positively bursting with excitement. He had worried that you only thought you would be okay with this, but you’re leaning your hips towards him just as eagerly as you do the days he spends hours unraveling you on his face, fingers, and cock. There’s a buzz settling under his skin that’s making every touch feel so sharply in focus. You let out a slightly embarrassed wine, but continue to display yourself to him shamelessly, begging for more.
A harsher smack stings your right cheek, sending ripples down your leg and up your side. You shiver at the burst of brilliant sensation. In anticipation for the next one, you shorten your breath, feeling on edge that you have no clue when it’s coming. The air of the room is electric as it brushes against the goosebumps on your body, vibrating with threat and promise. A breath too long passes with the hand gone and you tense up, immediately receiving a strike to the left in response. It rattles through your bones more with the tensed muscle, knocking the air from you in a loud moan. Your already burning flesh is struck over again, tripling the number of pin pricks you can feel dancing under his hand. You moan, “Sir!”
“Is that all you can take, precious?” Mihawk’s tone is just a touch gentler. He’s smoothing his palms over your marked skin, unable to stop his need to keep touching you. Staring down dark eyed at the first budding handprint, he desperately hopes you’ll let him make more. He’s barely got himself held back as it is now that he knows that sting on his palm, the sight of your ass shaking, the sharp clapping sound, your gasps and moans, the rush of absolute control. His breath is shaking with the need to overwhelm you and fill himself with as much of you as he can shove in his nerves.
“No,” you promise. You shuffle your knees just an inch closer to your chest and give an enticing wiggle of your hips. “More, please, my lord.”
“Good whore,” Mihawk groans. His hand digs into the flesh of your left hip and his right delivers two sharp slaps, each punctuated by a moan from you. You feel the hits fizzle in your skin and echo in a wanting burn rolling through your cunt. Your used pussy already felt swollen but now that’s amplified by bright pounding, feeling like your heart has fled your chest to beat between your legs. A thumb digs and swirls into the center of the bubbling handprint on your skin before disappearing again. You expect another hit, but instead you feel two thick fingers slipping through your entrance, causing you to moan long in relief. You greet them by eagerly pressing your hips backwards, trying to get his fingers to sink in deeper. Mihawk stops at the last knuckle and offers you two indulgent grinds of his hand before it rests still.
“Pleeeease,” you whine. Mihawk responds by adding another handprint to your ass, this time on the left side. His mind is swirling with the sound of your eager squeal, but he’s truly lost at the feeling wrapped around his fingers. He can feel the power of his own hit through you but it is the strong pulsing of your cunt that really makes his hips jerk with want. Mihawk presses his fingers down towards your belly button, seeking the way your pussy trembles with each successive spank. His punishing hand and your body’s spasms have his fingers hooked and twitching over your g-spot and you can feel another climax start to build with each throb of your clit.
“You were made for me weren’t you, treasure?” Mihawk asks, voice tight with desire. Time and time again, his mind has played out the dream of you under him like this but it never could have prepared him for the rush of you getting off to it just as badly. Seeing you become a needy wreck for his strength and will has his heart pounding and cock aching near painfully. He wets his lips and swallows, barely holding back from replacing his fingers with his tongue to taste just how sweetly you’re dripping for him. 
You cry out when his fingers leave you, earning a lighter smack to your hip in warning. You claw into the sheets in frustration but aren’t left wanting for long; fingers reenter you and your neglected right side gets groped. His hand massages deep, helping you loosen up again and enjoy the feeling of his fingers on both hands digging into you. Mihawk marvels at the sheen on your flesh where his fingers smeared the wetness from your leaking cunt. He can’t help but leave a harsh strike right on top of the wet patch. With the encouragement of your panting and moaning and writhing, he continues on, making you feel boiling hot and boneless. 
At this point you’ve begun grinding back on his fingers, fucking yourself back onto them shallowly, afraid that anything more obvious would have him pull them out for good this time. That fear is more instinct at this point than an actual thought; your mind feels like soup and you only know how to feel and react. It’s becoming clear to Mihawk from the way your voice strains higher and your body squeezes down on him that you’ve got a strong climax building in your core. All you can recognize is more and more pressure gripping through your hips and more and more delicious friction earned with each curl back on his fingers.
Suddenly, that friction is gone.
“Nooooooo, no si-hah-irrrr,” you sob. You’re set adrift with the coil tightening in you beginning to unwind. There’s a hand holding each hip but it’s not stabilizing you at all.
“Be good for me, precious,” Mihawk warns, removing his left hand to tap his finger above your clit. It sends unhelpful jolts through your skin, teasing the nerves you need him to smother.
“I’ll be good, sir, promise, promise,” you cry. The way you move and arch your ass in an attempt to earn his touch back is obscene and has Mihawk's hand planting bruises into your hip. You twist your neck to show him one teary eye over your shoulder. “I’m yours, my lord, pleeeeeease. I’ll do anything!”
“Anything?” he presses. His voice is just above a whisper, unwilling to interrupt any of the gasps and whines coming from you. You nod fervently. “Then don’t cum.”
Three fingers shove into you, slightly curled and thrusting with the force you’ve been begging for. The wet sounds from each dive of his fingers fill the air between your pants and moans. Mihawk’s arm hooks around your right thigh so he can start steady swirls of his fingers over your clit, timing them perfectly with the thrusts from his other hand. He tries to resist the urge to bend even closer to you, but he’s helpless to the pull. You feel the thick hair on his jaw brush over your right hip. The loving caress is soon replaced by warm lips and nipping teeth, adding even more sparks to the fire he’s tending in you. 
It’s feeling more impossible by the second to obey Mihawk. The muscles in your legs want to curl and lock up and your hips are shaking against Mihawk’s hold. You’re open mouthed and pleading, not quite sure what words are actually coming out, just sure that you have no ability to keep any of them in. Your hands are clawing into the mattress, hoping to find some purchase to center yourself. The rhythmic bursts of pleasure that Mihawk is diligently working from you are so strong you’re not quite sure if you’ve tipped into cumming yet except there’s been no promised snap.
Mihawk is unmeasured in the way he bites and sucks at your flesh, but his hands are another story. He knows your body - has studied your reactions for years - and uses that to slow and lighten just enough each time a wave of pressure around his fingers gets a little too strong or your writhing stills to a tremble half a second too long. Instead of pulling you back or pushing you forward, he keeps you exactly at the edge of climax where he can actually test your will. He’s hard set on knowing how hard you’re going to try to obey him, the thought and sight of your struggle for him filling him with addicting arousal.
Your will over your body is just about to give out so you snap your teeth into the meat of your thumb to pull some attention away from the bliss of Mihawk’s touch. His attention goes up to see the bite when he hears the pitiful moan sneaking past your clenched teeth. He moans deeply at the site. “You’re being so good for me, fuck.” He presses his cheek hard into the burning handprints on your ass and unconsciously mimics the grinding of your hips with his own, finding no relief for himself. One more uptick in force and speed into your plush swollen pussy has you jerking. With digging teeth and a yelling moan into your hand, you manage to hold back against the raging tide of your orgasm.
Mihawk pulls from you and you collapse against the bed, taking in gasping breaths. You’re jostled as Mihawk shifts around quickly, moving to cover you. His breath is loud behind you as he settles there, legs stretched out between your and upper body help up only on his left elbow. That hand has shoved under you to flip around and grip your shoulder tight. His right hand anchors on your hip, guiding you back against his starved grinding.
“You did so well for me, my little whore,” Mihawk breathes into your ear. He nibbles at it before moving down to suck more red marks into your neck and shoulder. The slick way his cock glides through your folds has him burn with satisfaction. He made this pathetic mess of you. Having you soaking for him was no rarity, but the whiny mindlessness, the complete take over by your needy instincts, that was new and only had his need to tear into you grow stronger. He rumbles into your shoulder, “My perfect precious cunt, cum as much as you want.”
Mihawk is guiding himself into you and you shoot right back to being so close after only a few thrusts. You manage to slide your legs a little wider apart across the bed despite his heavy body, packed with muscle, pinning you under him.. It lets his balls tap at your clit with each thrust and just a handful more have a violent orgasm tearing through you. You cry out your bliss every moment you aren’t simply gasping and feel the muscles all the way up your core join the squeeze of your cunt, making the bright ball of pleasure feel like it’s reaching just as high. Your whole body is ringing with the echoes of it, everything feeling so overwhelmingly good.
Mihawk’s hips stutter for only a second before he’s continuing his ruthless pace. His body and mind are flooded with you and he folds to the torrent. A ravenous “more” is mumbled against your skin, barely reaching you through the whiteout in your head. His left hand shoots down to help keep your hips tilted and steady, leaving the weight of his chest to push you deeper into the bed. You’re completely smothered in him, his sweat damp skin pressing and sliding over yours. Unable to fully inhale under his resting bulk, your world gets a little fuzzier. There’s not a single part of you that cares; you feel trapped and controlled and protected and desired. You feel truly wanted and owned, being fucked into the matress under Mihawk while he holds you like a lifeline, sinks teeth into your shoulder, and speaks dark praises to you. When you come back to yourself more fully, having long been suspended somewhere between the crest of your orgasm and settled pleasure, you make little attempts to please Mihawk more. He notices the little turns and grinds of your hips and rewards you by slithering a hand under you to begin petting circles over your clit.
“You feel delicious, precious, you’re so fucking good, held out for me so long.” Mihawk’s voice is a moan and growl and sigh, sounding more untethered than you’d ever heard him. “Need to feel you forever -nnnnnghh- give me more.” The last word is all snarl and he’s shoving his face harder into the crook of your neck, sinking teeth back into your skin.
You aren’t sure if you have more to give him but still try, unquestioningly following his will. You don’t think you’ll need to try for long; both of you are wound precariously tight. Mihawk has lost his will to pull from you, so he moves against you in strong deep grinds. You’ve never felt closer; every sense is filled with Mihawk, every breath, every thought, every piece of you. It feels like he’s fucking you deeper than he’s ever reached, teasing your cervix with his thick tip, pulling you apart as if he’s somehow gotten bigger from the way your muscles have tightened around him. Mihawk feels the telltale buzz of his end flash through his nerves. Desperate, he bites out one more order, “You’re mine. Say it.”
You find the breath to chant, “I’m yours, I’m yours, yours-”
One arm shoves upwards, trapped tight between your breasts and crushing you back into him. He groans out, “Fuck, precious,” before his hips jerk and his cock is pulsing in you. His forehead presses to the side of your head and he’s moaning right into your ear. Fingers twitch against your clit and you feel his hot cum pumping into you and his arms cage you right to him and the friction of it all sends you right into another climax. This one is just as overwhelming as the last but sits in your body more smoothly. It’s a satisfied heat radiating through your muscles, rolling through you instead of jerking. You fall limp under the force of it, left to lay prone and take in every second of your body clutching and reshaping to Mihawk. He guides you both through it with the slow grind of his hips and the points of clarity where his hands grasp you.
“There you go, love, you are divine,” Mihawk praises quietly, as the aftershocks begin to settle out of you both. He gets his arms under him to lift some of his weight off of you and allow you to breathe deeply. He noses at your cheek, peppering you with kisses. You come back to your body slowly as he moves his kisses over the tender skin of your neck and shoulder. Testing the feeling, you open and close your hands, releasing the scrunched sheets. They feel inflated and clumsy, but it will do. Your right hand searches behind your head and quickly finds its way into Mihawk’s soft hair. You scratch lightly at his scalp while your other hand slides across the sheet to find his. Before you manage it, he puts his hand over your own, entwining your fingers in a comfortable hold. Mihawk rests his head behind yours, taking some time to breathe and bask in your touch. He decorates the passing moments with gentle praises, content sighs, and brushing thumbs.
Eventually, he gains the will to pull away from you to prep you both for bed. The moan you give him when he starts to pull away is endearingly grumpy like a spoiled pet roused from a nap. He’s just standing up when he notices your weak and begrudging attempts to get up and follow him.
“Stay down - you’re shaking like a newborn fawn.” The light insult is softened by a loving kiss to your temple. You’re more than used to his dry tone and direct comments anyway, knowing something like that had no cruel intent and that’s simply how he talked. That didn’t stop you from pretending to be a bit upset from time to time for apology affection. You’re pretty certain he was onto you. You were also pretty sure he enjoyed playing along.
You float thoughtlessly in your body, feeling like you’re napping pleasantly without going under. You startle when a hand lands on your shoulder. It’s hot and damp and you understand why when a soft cloth begins washing over your skin. Continuing your heavy-bodied haze, you lay there and let Mihawk wipe over your whole body, only moving to the patient prompts of his hands nudging and turning you. You wince when he works over your ass and pelvis, earning extra affectionate words and touches. You’re on your back, peeking up blearily at him through heavy eyelids, when he finishes up.
“Bathroom?” he prompts and you hum a lazy affirmative. You’re carried like a princess to and from the short stop and are thankful there’s no longer anything to keep you from or possibly interrupt your coming slumber. When you’re placed back onto the bed, Mihawk follows you with the sheets and comforter in tow. With practiced ease, you cocoon together in the bedding. On nights like this, where Mihawk has extra need to feel like he’s surrounding you, he pulls your back flush to his front and curls around you. His skin feels soft on the many places you’re molded together, but you notice it most while you both shift your legs to intertwine. 
“Dove?” Mihawk calls, wanting to know you can still hear him. You hum and snuggle your cheek further into his bicep. “I love you,” he whispers into your hair, punctuating the declaration with a lingering kiss.
“Love you, too,” you promise, adding one last gentle squeeze to your hold on his arm.
Tomorrow he would wake you with gentle kisses and caressing hands. Your favorite morning drink would be ready for you to sip on while leaned back against his chest, enjoying the way he massages the soreness from your thighs. A bath with your favorite salts would await your tired body. Mihawk would sit with you and feed you both fruits and sweet bread. Once the candles saturate the air, he would set about cleaning you head to toe. He would gently tend each bruise and bite mark, murmuring his gratitude and devotion. Each act of loving worship would be a balm to you both, affirming that connecting to and caring for each other is both your greatest want and deepest need. For now, you settle into each other for some much needed rest.
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prythianpages · 7 months
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When I Kissed the Teacher | Cassian
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summary: After shameless flirting and one drunken confession, you decide to finally own up to your feelings for Cassian.
warnings: fluff, some suggestiveness/reader thirsting for Cas bc who wouldn't??
a/n: @daycourtofficial suggested this song and idea so big shoutout to her! Though I did a poll and Az won (you can find his version here), I decided to also write a version for Cas as a huge thank you for following me! I just reached 1k ♥ For the sake of this fic, Nesta and Cas are just good friends.
This is part of my ABBA x ACOTAR series (masterlist) where I dedicate a song to a character (:
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Cassian strolls along the hallway, a carefree whistle coming from his lips. A towel is draped casually over his shoulder, barely doing anything to cover his well-defined upper half. A satisfying workout has left his muscles pleasantly fatigued and a content smile on his face. He usually trains in the morning but unfortunately, he had to rearrange his schedule to accompany Azriel on trip to Windhaven.
A creaking sound halts his steps and he turns his head to find you, his favorite trainee, struggling to open the door that leads to the infamous ten-thousand steps. Cassian watches you struggle for a moment longer, suppressing a laugh at the way you huff out in exasperation, allowing your forehead to fall against the door in defeat.
“What are you doing?”
Your head whips around in response, a dizzying blur causing a momentary loss of balance. As your entire weight leans against the door, it finally yields with a creak. Both the house and Cassian spring to action. A sudden gust of wind sweeps through, slamming the door shut and sending you stumbling forward instead.
Cassian catches you in his arms, one hand securing the small of your back while the other cradles the back of your head. Seemingly unfazed by the dangerous fate you almost, quite literally, threw yourself into, you appear nonchalant as you pull back slightly.
"I'm going out.”
As you speak, Cassian catches the subtle scent of ripe red berries coming from your breath. He recognizes it as Mor’s favorite wine. His hazel eyes graze over your body, taking in your thin cami top and shorts with heart patterns that match the hearts on the fluffy slippers you wear.
“Are you drunk?” He asks, his voice warm with amusement.
You don’t answer him, seemingly distracted by his bare chest. A thin line of sweat makes the black ink of his tattoos glisten, enticing you to lean in and have a taste. If you had drank a bit more, perhaps, you would’ve. But for now, you're content to place your hands on his chest instead, heart fluttering at the sensation of the hard muscle beneath. 
“Mmm, you’re absolutely delicious. Has anyone told you, you should be shirtless more often?”
Cassian chuckles. He’s caught you staring at him during training, often flexing his muscles on purpose for you to give you a better show. And it’s no secret that he finds you attractive too, especially after you coaxed it out of him one morning.
“Get off that pretty ass of yours and give me fifty.”
Your mouth falls open but it’s not the fifty push ups you’re gasping over. “You think I’m pretty?”
His gaze lowers, trailing down your body appreciatively before lifting back up to meet your eyes again. His lips twitch upwards and there’s a sparkle in his hazel depths. “I think you’re many things, sweetheart. Doesn’t keep you from giving me fifty. On the floor. Now.”
Flirting is common between you two but even then, there’s no way you’d say those words sober to him. “Yup, you’re drunk,” Cassian says. He makes a mental note to chide Mor the next morning for letting you out of her sight.
“And you’re Cassian. My favorite teacher.” You grin lazily at him, a finger grazing a path over to where his heart beats. Your touch creates a ripple of warmth, prompting his heart to lurch forward, craving for more of it. 
Get it together, he thinks as he reminds himself that you’re drunk.
“Mr. Cassian. My Mr. Cassian. My Cassian.”
A flush of warmth paints his cheeks at your slur of words and he doesn’t care if you don’t mean those words the way he’d like you to. You probably won’t even remember tonight and it’s this thought that gives him the courage to reciprocate. His fingers grip your chin lightly, thumb sweeping over your cheek in a tender caress.
“Your Cassian,” he affirms gently, a soft smile playing on his lips. If only you knew how much he adored you... 
Hearts take shape in your eyes, softening your gaze.  You throw your arms around his neck, pulling him closer into your drunken embrace. Cassian responds, his hands securing beneath your knees, effortlessly lifting you. A playful giggle escapes you, only to be hushed when you notice him carrying you away from the door.
“No, Cas,” you shake your head at him. Attempting to squirm away, you insistently gesture back towards the door. Yet, his arms around you tighten, holding you in place. “We’re going the wrong way! Rita’s is that way!”
“We’re going to bed.”
Your squirming stops and you draw back, looking up at him with a flirtatious flutter of your eyelashes. “We are?”
“You–you’re going to bed. Your own bed, where you will sleep…alone,” Cassian finds himself stammering as he avoids your gaze.
“I don’t want to be alone,” you reply and he can hear the frown in your voice. “I want to be with you.”
“Cauldron boil me,” Cassian curses, quickening his steps. The faster he can get you to your room, the better.
When Cassian finally reaches your room, he thanks the house for opening the door for him. Your silence prompts him to assume you’ve fallen asleep. As he carries you to your bed, his eyes wander around your room, taking in the small details. His heart swells with warmth when he catches a glimpse of the book he had given you over training methods–his favorite book–sitting on your nightstand.
Cassian pulls the covers off your bed and feels you stir in his hold, arms and legs tightening around him as if you could sense his impending departure. He literally has to pry your grip off of him so he can lay you down on your bed. He tucks you in with such tenderness that it sobers you up for just a moment, eyes blinking open. “Can’t you stay?”
The pout you give him is endearing and tugs at his heartstrings.  “I’m sorry, I can’t.”
“But–”
He brushes your hair back with a soft expression on his face that would’ve had you melting, if you weren’t upset by his rejection. 
"Not when you’re like this.”
“But…,” you begin again. A pleading look fills your eyes and there’s a subtle wobble of your lips. “What if I tell you I love you?”
Cassian pauses. His eyes study your face in contemplation. He would love nothing more than to slip under the covers with you but he remains firm in his resolve. So with a soft pat to your head, he says, “tell me when you’re sober, sweetheart.”
**
“Tell me when you’re sober, sweetheart,” you mock Cassian’s voice with a scowl the next morning. Contrary to Cassian’s belief, you remembered everything. “Ugh! He might’ve well just told me he hates me!”
“Or maybe, I don’t know, hear me out,” Nesta begins, raising her hands before you could interrupt. She sits across from you on your bed, already dressed in her training leathers. “He wants you to confess to him when you’re sober.”
Emerie, who leans against your desk, giggles at the look on your face. “Don’t be rational, Nesta,” she says in a teasing tone. “He totally hates her.”
The door to your room creaks open and Gywn steps in with a slight frown. “Hurry up! We’re going to be late for our morning session,” she then looks at you, her frown deepening when she takes note of your disheveled state. “Y/n, what are you still doing in your pajamas?”
 “I’m not going today. Tell them I’m hungover,” you tell her with a grimace, pretending to be sick. Nesta rolls her eyes at your dramatics. “I think I’m going to throw up. You should go before I do.”
Gwyn glances toward Emerie, who had also been drinking with you and Mor last night. She then turns back to you with narrowed eyes. “Emerie seems just fine to me.”
Emerie shrinks back with a small blush. The two of you exchange a look. Yes, you had been drinking with Mor and Emerie last night. But you had done most of the drinking while your friend snuck off with the pretty blonde.
“Leave her be,” Emerie says as she stands up straight, covering for you the same way you had for her.  “I’m sure Cas will understand, given the state he found her in last night.”
“What? Don’t tell me you confessed your feelings while drunk,” Gwyn says with an amused giggle. As the silence stretches, her eyes widen, head turning to you. You're quick to avoid her gaze, prompting her to remark, "No wonder he's blushing like a fool today."
That makes your head perk up almost immediately, eyes finding hers only to see the playful glint in her eyes. Nesta and Emerie laugh while you fling one of your pillows at Gwyn. She catches it with ease and throws it back at you. Surrendering to the inevitable teasing, you let the pillow hit you, collapsing onto the comforting expanse of your bed, hoping the blankets might swallow you whole.
“Can you all just leave me be?” You groan. “I’d like to wallow in my own embarrassment alone.”
"Fine," Nesta sighs, patting your leg as she hops off your bed. "But don't think about skipping tomorrow's training!”
**
The next morning dawns, and you find yourself unable to face training, still grappling with the aftermath of your drunken confession to Cassian. Out of all the fish in the sea of Velaris, your heart chose to hyperfixate on him. Your teacher. 
As night falls, you're contemplating skipping training again. It's only another day, and with Friday approaching, the weekend promises a much-needed break. This extra time might be just what you need to gather the courage to face him once more.
Turning in for the night, you cast a glance towards your nightstand. There, beside the book Cassian lent you, sits an untouched hangover tonic. It appeared the morning after your first skipped training session. When you thanked your friends, they had only looked back at you in confusion. You didn’t have to guess who left it there for you after that.
With a sigh, you close your eyes. One of these days, you'll tell him you dream of him every night. Until then, you savor the bittersweet anticipation and allow sleep to pull you into its embrace.
In the sweet haven of your dream, you and Cassian stroll through the center of Velaris as the city shimmers around you. Cassian laughs, the sound echoing like a sweet melody. The two of you then find yourselves in a meadow bathed in moonlight. A sea of luminescent flowers surround you and as the wind blows around you softly, Cassian sneezes. It’s your turn to laugh then.
Cassian rolls his eyes at you and then reaches for your hand, his touch warm and reassuring. He pulls you into a dance with a smile that fills your heart with warmth and–
Your body stirs at the sudden loss of warmth and the soft smile that was on your lips morphs into a frown. Something seizes your ankles, yanking you down the bed. With a sudden jolt, your eyes fly open, and a scream escapes your throat. It takes a moment to recgonize the hazel eyes glaring down at you.
“I hope that dream of yours was beautiful because you’re about to have a nightmare of a training session,” Cassian huffs but there’s a teasing to his tone. “Come on, get up.”
Staring up at him in surprise, your heart flutters, still entangled in the remnants of the dream. Unsatisfied with your lack of response, Cassian leans forward and effortlessly picks you up, hoisting you over his shoulder. The trance shatters, and you protest, kicking and punching.
"Hey! Let me go!" you exclaim, your resistance met with Cassian's apparent indifference as he heads towards the door.
"At least let me freshen up and change!" you plea in exasperation. "You can't expect me to train in my pajamas!"
Cassian rolls his eyes because if you had woken up early like usual, you would’ve had more than enough time to change into something more comfortable for training. He doesn’t care. He just needs you to be there. On time.
“I’ll catch a cold or freeze to death on the rooftop!”
He pauses, his wings shuddering at the thought. While he doesn’t care about what you wear,  he does care about you. Setting you down, Cassian regards you with a stern expression, though his stomach flutters. He hadn’t seen you since that night.
“You have 5 minutes.”
Cassian watches as you spring into action, your hurried footsteps echoing through the room as you run toward your bathroom. He bites back the urge to laugh. He’d never seen you run so fast.
**
Cassian was not exaggerating when he said you were in for a nightmare of a training session. Much to your dismay, your friends were all under Azriel’s instruction for the morning, allowing Cassian’s attention to solely focus on you. Something you normally would’ve swooned over but given your current tension…
“You’re doing it wrong.”
You let out a huff and lower your sword, dragging the pointy edge along the gravel. A scowl taints your features. “I need a break.”
Cassian shakes his head at you. “Not until you get this move right.”
He moves to stand behind you, placing his hands at your waist. Suddenly, you're thankful for the vigorous activity Cassian pushed you into. It allows you to put full blame for your heavy breathing on the demanding training and not on the way Cassian’s warm breath tickles your ears as he instructs you on how to properly position yourself.
“Like this,” he tells you, using a knee to prod your legs further apart.
Your knees wobble and once again, you blame it on your exhausted muscles. Cassian chuckles, the hands on your waist helping hold you steady. “Are you drunk, y/n?” He teases.
You turn your head to glare at him. “I’m sober.”
Cassian raises an eyebrow at you. “Oh?”
You toss your sword aside, freeing yourself from his hold, and spin around to face him. "And you want to know something else?"
Crossing his arms against his chest, Cassian's lips twitch upwards. He’s fully aware of the way your gaze momentarily dips down, catching the flex of his biceps. "What?" he prompts, the hint of a teasing smile playing on his face. 
Suddenly, the words die at your throat as you meet his gaze again. The intensity in his eyes rattles your nerves and you feel the courage slowly slipping away. Desperate to not let this moment slip through your fingers, you curl your fingers into his leathers and yank him down to your height. Choosing to show him instead, you lean forward and press your lips to his.
You pour out all your feelings into the kiss, heart quickening when he begins to reciprocate. His arms wrap around your waist, pulling you flush against him. He’d dreamt of this moment just as much as you did and now that he had a taste, he didn’t want to stop.
Unfortunately, for him, the screams tearing through the training grounds have you pulling away. Out of the corner of your eye, you can see Emerie and Gwyn, going wild and playfully tugging at Nesta’s arms while she laughs. Even Azriel indulges in a chuckle.
Blush creeps into your cheeks. You hold your breath as the world seems to stand still. However, instead of an awkward response, Cassian simply smiles, the flush of his cheeks matching yours and you feel like you can breathe again.
“I like you,” you finally confess, exhaling as your gaze dips downward. “Like might not even be sufficient enough at this point…"
Cassian's fingers gently grip your chin, coaxing your gaze back up to his. His thumb sweeps over your cheek in a tender caress—the same way it did on the night of your drunken confession. But this time, he doesn't hold back. He allows his thumb to trace the soft plush of your lips next.
And if the gleam in his hazel eyes was not enough to send you to the seventh heaven, his next words did.
“I’m falling for you too.” Cassian says with a fond smile.
Your lips lift into a smile of your own as you look back at him. But it's short lived. There's a flash of red and then Cassian is forcing your sword back into your hands.
"I thought we were done for today," you groan, knowing that you in fact were not done. You just hoped your confession would've distracted him enough.
The soft smile on Cassian's face is replaced with a smug smirk. "Not until you get this move right, sweetheart. In position. Go."
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a/n: hope you all enjoyed this one! ❤️ idk how siphon powers work 100% but let's just roll with Cas's siphons being able to pick up a sword.
tagging: @hellodarling1357 , @kennedy-brooke, @scooobies
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juliewillruinu · 26 days
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"One Last Time" | Toji Fushiguro x Reader
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Pov: You're being married off by your clan which caused you to distance yourself from Toji, but how will you react to finding out he is also being arranged to marry another woman?
18+ MDNI
Dom Toji x fem!reader, smut, P in V, no protection, overflowing cum, slight degrading, cheating (kinda, but not really), ass smacking, and a bit of fingering. (I do not own the artwork above.)
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You promised yourself you wouldn't see him again. That your eyes would never meet his.
You promised yourself that you'd live a good life without him. You didn't need him any longer.
You promised yourself to do what was best for your clan. They were your priority.
You promised yourself that you'd be happy with your future husband. You'd learn to love him.
You smiled whenever someone mentioned the name of your fiance, a man, not named Toji. A man you've never met in person. You'd tell them, "I know I'll be happy with him. I've heard so many good things about him."
Everything was sunshine and rainbows until you heard the news that Toji was to be marry into another clan. You acted as if you were fine with it but you were not. Toji was yours. Your family could sell you off to another clan all they wanted, but to know that while you were gone another woman would keep him company, take over your role in his life, it saddened you, it pissed you off, it made you want to strangle yourself. You spent nights crying yourself to sleep. What were you going to do? Was there anything you could do? You could only choose family or love. In this time and age, you couldn't dare have both.
You promised yourself you'd never let his skin grace yours again.
Yet, here you are. Crying in Toji's arms, your face buried in the crook of his neck as his back is rested against the wall of your room. He entered carefully and quietly through your window. He heard how you shut yourself away recently, he knew why. He knew he had to comfort you. One last time.
You told him, "I can be without you, Toji."
"You told me you didn't need me."
You pulled away to bore your red orbs into his and spoke hastily. "I lied! I do need you so don't marry that woman. Don't hurt me like this anymore."
Toji yanked your chin, drawing your face close to his. In that moment, you saw an intensity in his eyes that was unlike anything you had ever witnessed before. His usual demeanor, so often marked by indifference and a seemingly impenetrable exterior, was shattered. The anger and vulnerability in his gaze revealed a depth of emotion you had never seen in him.
He had always seemed untouchable, as though nothing could truly affect him. But now, with you so close, everything was different. You were the only person who had ever seen beyond his Zenin lineage, who had looked at him not as a member of a powerful clan but simply as Toji. The memory of your words, "You're not a Zenin to me. I see you as just Toji," echoed in his mind, a poignant reminder of the rare connection you shared.
"You're not the only one who feels hurt by this. Do you think I like the idea of another man having his lips against yours?" His lips were dangerously close to yours. It made you shiver in anticipation. "Do you think I want him to touch what is mine? Just knowing you'll spend your wedding night with him makes me want to rip his head off. I can't let you go like that."
"Then don't." You said almost pleading. "Don't let him take me away, Toji."
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"Do you think he could fuck you this good, huh? I know all your weak spots. He'd be an amateur compared to me. Don't you think?"
"...yes, yes, yes..."
Your moans filled the room as you watched how mercilessly Toji was fucking you through your vanity mirror. His eyes scrunched close as his hand held one of your wrists down and held your hand in his other. His large, vainy cock had you stretched out, vigorously entering to hit your vulnerable spots and your insides, sucking him right back in when he pulled back. Sweat glistened off both your bodies as the force he was using was causing your bed to shake. The heavy storm outside kept your screams from being heard by the servants who might be walking around during these late hours. Toji kept his promise when he told you that'd he'd fuck you so hard you wouldn't be able to get out of bed for your wedding.
Red love bites were left on your neck and breasts while you returned the favor by leaving faint scratch marks on his chest and back and teeth marks on his shoulders.
You hissed as Toji's tip pounded against the one spot you enjoyed the most. You were close again. Just a little longer and you'd melt for him again. Toji must have gotten the message as his eyes fluttered open before making contact with yours through the mirror. You could see a mischievous smirk grow on his face. He could feel your insides slowly clamping down on his cock, almost ready to rip it off him.
"Who gave you permission to come yet?" Before you had a chance to answer, Toji had already pulled his cock out causing a slight "pop" noise to occur. His cum from previous rounds began to ooze out of you now that there wasn't anything to keep it inside. It practically left you whining.
"Don't take it out. I was s'close."
"Naughty girl, you have no shame do you? Tomorrow you'll be someone's wife and here you are drooling for your lovers cock?"
He took his teasing further and inserted his index finger which he pumped back and forth against your walls. He wouldn't even give you at least two fingers, not that it would have been enough to help you finish, but it would give much better results than one finger and Toji knew this well.
"Toji, put it back in...please."
"Do you want it that bad?" You nodded frantically. "Then go ahead take it. Milk it, make yourself cum on it, but you'll be the one doing all the work."
You sat up seeing Toji lay his scratched back against the bed before getting on top of him with your shaking legs. You weren't used to being on top and his posture made it seem as if he'd have you do all the work, but you didn't mind. If he was allowed to prove to you that no man could fuck you the way he could, it was only right to prove to him that no woman would ever be good enough for him unless it was you.
One of his hands traveled up your thigh, fingers caressing your supple skin while the other attempted to align his cock to your entrance. His hand went to your hips, ready to help ease you down on it only to be met by your boldness as you slammed yourself down on his thick length. He threw his head back, grunting as your insides molded around him perfectly causing his cock to pulsate in excitement. His large hands gripped each side of your bum, begging for you to move already. You placed your hands on his toned stomach to keep yourself balanced and began to move up and down. You took your precious time, taking it nice and slow. Toji shouldn't be the only one allowed to tease.
"What do you think you’re doing?"
"Teaching you a lesson from earlier."
"Ah!"
He growled giving your ass a hard smack that left a burning sensation, "don't be a brat."
'You're the one acting like one,' you said to yourself before you picked up the pace. Each time you move down his cock the skin of your bum and his shaft made loud slapping noises that left his gulping.
"Fuck, just like, princess. So fucking tight. You like that don't you?"
You met another slap on your ass when you didn't respond fast enough.
"Yes! It's the best, Toji! It's so fucking good!"
The bed creaked underneath the both of you, his cock hitting every spot imaginable. You could feel his cock start to swell, he was close just as were you. He pulled you down against his chest, wrapping a arm around you waist to keep you attached to him while his other hand pushed down on your bum as he jerks his hips up. There's no doubt about it. You were so cock drunk that even your moans sounded incoherent. It felt like your mind was elsewhere while the center of your stomach tightened.
His hot breath brushed against your skin, "Tell me who you love. Come on, tell me, little whore."
"You! I love you! Fuck, Toji. I love you." He hungrily smashed his lips against yours giving you no time to breathe. His tongue wrestling against yours, seeking for its submission to him. You fisted at the pillows near his head as his cock was destroying your insides. Your thoughts only focused on Toji as he nipped at your bottom lip.
"I can't hold it anymore~"
"Fuck, me too. Come on, princess. Give it to me and I'll reward you."
Toji, in the throes of passion, drives his hips firmly against you one last time. His release is powerful, filling you with a warm, thick sensation as his cum spreads inside you. You feel him pulse and release, the heat and pressure intensifying as he finishes.
As he remains inside you, the sensation of his cum beginning to overflow adds a heightened sense of fullness. Your body responds instinctively, your lower body jolting slightly as the sensation of his release overwhelms you. The tightness in your stomach starts to ease, replaced by a warm, satisfying relaxation.
•••
You and Toji laid sideway near each other, your bodies hidden underneath the silk sheets. You could feel his warm lips press against your head as you buried your face in his chest. His strong hand move up and down your back. His touch, his scent his breathing, they were all so comforting. How could you possible live without this man?
"Toji, let's run away. Tonight. Just me and you. Let's never come back here." Your spoke with a straight face, Toji rested his chin over your head, chuckling at your serious tone.
"What about your clan, hmm?"
"..Screw them.."
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doumadono · 8 months
Note
hiii!!
hope it's okay if i request a little something for sinful sunday (i'm 19)
would it be okay to ask for dumbification kink with aizawa?
thank you anyway!
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SINFUL SUNDAY
The room echoes with nothing but your sweet moans and Shota's heavy breaths, well, if you discount the occasional creaking of a wooden desk, wet noises and the enticing sound of skin slapping against skin.
The ceaseless clinking of his leather belt buckle coaxes forth a weighty sob from the depths of your throat, a blend of lust and despair intertwining. The anticipation in your belly unravels at a leisurely pace, and the looming orgasms skulk back into their corners, denied their moment of reckoning yet.
"Love, come on," your endeavor to pull Shota closer is abruptly thwarted. "H-Harder."
Aizawa's rhythmic thrusts into your dripping core momentarily erase any grasp on how limbs and words function. Instead, he intertwines his fingers with yours, directing your hands back beneath his grasp, once again pinning them above your head as they were just moments ago. "Apologies, love," his snicker drips with wicked delight, "but this time, you're not the one setting any rules here."
Even in your half-defunct state of senses, you sense the man leaning over you, your leg draped over his shoulder feeling the stretch of his movement – and then he pauses as he reaches his intended destination. A sharp nip to your earlobe clears the fog, and as his tongue glides over the tingling skin, a ragged mewl escapes you. "S-Shota!"
"You're familiar with the rules, baby," Shota purrs into your ear, his silky voice contrasting sharply with your disheveled state. He remains nestled in the crook of your neck, thrusting harder into your dripping core at a new angle. Pulling you into a fervent kiss, he licks into your mouth with unbridled lust. "I'm in charge. Your only job is to sing for me. Just the way I like it the most. That's it, kitten."
Aizawa gazes into your bewildered eyes, a smile so sweet and angelic that, for a moment, you almost buy into the idea that he's about to make things smoother for you, especially as he releases your arms.
Frantically, you search for something to grasp onto, an opportunity to seize control, to set the pace — but your autonomy is short-lived.
A hefty glob of saliva makes a precise landing on your swollen clitoris, followed by the nimble, skillful fingers of your husband working the drool around your sensitive bundle of nerves.
"O-Ooooo," your lips form a perfect "O" as you cast a gaze up at Shota with teary eyes; a solitary tear makes its way down your flushed cheek, landing on your naked breast.
"You brought this upon yourself, didn't you," Shota coos into the air, delivering a few playful slaps to your slicky folds, followed by an indulgent rubbing that elicits an arch in your back toward him. "My little, naive girl didn't think things through, hmmm? What did you expect when you sauntered in here in that skimpy skirt, tempting fate by presenting your beautiful ass while filing documents into a cabinet, hmm? I've had a taxing day, dealing with class 1-A for just an hour, and I needed a release for the accumulated stress. And what better way to do that than fucking with my stunning wife?" The black-haired man mused.
You're itching to protest, to inform him that he could exercise more self-control and that you didn't intentionally provoke this.
However, as he resumes relentlessly pounding your throbbing and drenched pussy, hoisting both your legs over his muscular shoulders, and murmuring about your brainlessness for him, your comebacks meet an untimely demise. All you can manage is to nod along with the intensity of his thrusts, fervently moaning, "m-more, mo-more, moooore, p-please, p-please, p-please, Shota."
Aizawa's momentum doesn't show any signs of slowing down, a primal rhythm that vividly illustrates the depth of his own arousal. Shota thrusts into you with precision, a raw hunger guiding every move. His robust arm envelops your thighs as you plant your heels atop his shoulders, and Shota tenderly glides his calloused hand up and down the plush, warm skin, squeezing wherever he pleases, urging your legs closer to his chest adorned with a long-sleeved, black shirt. With each forceful thrust, with every instance his rock-solid cock glides against your tender, spongy walls, his midnight-black, tousled locks cascade onto his forehead, a few damp strands clinging to his temples.
With a final cry, your orgasm crashes over you, a powerful force that brings forth unintentional tears. "O-Oh! Shota! Yes!"
Shota relentlessly pursues his own climax, the tight grip of your pussy on his member leaving him little room for endurance. He only relents when he's completely spent, his cum erupting deep in your warmth. Soon, the man's leaning forward to press a little kiss to your forehead.
You both are panting, and you're left undeniably senseless.
"I never asked for this, you little devil," you playfully scold the man, earning a small snort from him.
"Mhm, yeah, sure, I'll believe you, kitten. We both know well you're the one with the insatiable desires in our marriage."
Your mouth drops open with a loud gasp, a frown appearing on your forehead as he assists you off his desk, handing you your clothes. "Excuse me, Shota, you're just making things up now. You're the needy one. If you weren't, we wouldn't have… done that… now, in the teachers' lounge…"
He helps you get dressed and presentable again, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. "It doesn't matter, kitten. Thank you for helping me ease the stress down."
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yanderestarangel · 10 months
Text
DUMB MIDNIGHT THOUGHTS - JOHNNY CAGE MK1
NIGHT 4: V!SEX, DEGRADATION.
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TW: dirty talk, pussy talk, afab reader, degradation, just a short smut.
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You decided to wear something more provocative that night, a short baby blue silk dress that showed the cleavage of your breasts, the construction of the dress was short, giving the feeling that any false step would show you your beautiful ass, in addition to the pantyhose that you wore to make yourself even sexier, and all for a reason: Johnny Cage, your movie actor boyfriend, he asked you to go to an awards show with him so, you thought it was a good idea to tease him a little bit.
You had the perfect makeup, expensive perfume and everything sponsored by him, so he soon saw you leave the apartment, while he practically dropped the cell phone from his hand, his lower lip trembling with desire and the erection quickly evident in the expensive suit from him.
You smiled through the glossy gloss on his lips, as you walked towards him sensually, he knew you were teasing him, and he was loving it.
"-Damn baby, I can't believe you managed to get more beautiful" Johnny said laughing while squeezing your ass hard, not caring if you were still on the sidewalk, you soon felt his fingers go through your lace panties, teasing the soft flesh of your pussy as he massaged your clit lightly
"-Hmm... Those panties make your pussy fat... and I loved that shit" Cage says laughing while his lower lip was still trembling, quickly throwing you inside his black smoked glass sports car, locking the door while. He quickly pulled back your lace panties, exposing the juices glistening hole of your pussy as he quickly fingered the way, making you arch the back of the leather seat chilled by the air conditioning as he grinned cocky at you.
"-So good to me, so wet and receptive, did you really think I wouldn't notice you dressed like that? a pretty slut, dressing like that just to tease me, didn't you (Y/N)? because now you got my attention, you needy slut."
Johnny soon took his rough fingers out of your cunt, making a delicious wet sound as he quickly drew his cock into your eager cunt.
"-Yes kitten, I'm going to fuck you today, as hard as I can, until you're so shaky you can barely walk."
He groaned at the sensation, relishing in the way you fit so perfectly."-Fuck, you're so tight" He grunted, his voice strained with the effort of holding back. With one hand still firmly on your waist, he reached up with the other to fondle your breasts, tweaking your nipples between his fingers - Cage wanted to make you feel every sensation, to ensure that you were completely under his control. "-Squeeze me tight, baby... " He commanded, his tone devious yet commanding.
His grip on your arms tightened, his thrusts becoming even more relentless. Johnny could feel his own climax building, the tension mounting to an almost unbearable level. "-Such a good little slut, taking my cock like the obedient toy you are."
He brought his hand to your cheek, caressing it softly before delivering a sharp slap against your flushed skin. "-You're such a filthy, needy little slut. You want my cum, don't you? You want to be filled with me, marked by me." He groaned, his voice deep and guttural, as he emptied himself inside you, the warmth of his cum filling your depths.
"-Such a good little slut... You know how to please daddy johnny, don't you?"
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©YANDERESTARANGEL 2023
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ginnsbaker · 1 year
Text
empty crib
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Summary: “So?” you ask, not lifting your gaze from the crib you've been assembling for the past thirty minutes. Wanda simply shakes her head, discarding the pregnancy test into the trash.
Word count: 5.3K+ | Tags: Smut (18+), Angst, ILGOSS Universe, Slight breeding kink
A/N: Another oneshot in the ILGOSS universe, this time requested by anon who wanted something about Wanda and Reader's struggles with getting pregnant.
Masterlist
-
You slide slowly inside of Wanda with a groan, starting with steady, shallow thrusts. Your hands find their way to her waist, fingers inching towards the softness of her lower belly. Each movement of your hips against hers is fueled by the tantalizing idea of filling her. The thought is driving you crazy, and you can't help but visualize a future where Wanda carries a piece of both of you inside her. 
Ever since the two of you finally decided to get pregnant, and that Wanda would be the one to carry the baby, you've been constantly consumed by the thought of impregnating your wife, fucking her like an obsessed, horny teenager every time you get the chance. Wanda hasn't expressed any complaints either. She seems to want you too, in that desperate, touch-me-or-I’ll-die kind of way. The last time you were both this intoxicated with each other was during your honeymoon, but the difference now is that you're both more comfortable and daring in bed, having had ample time to learn about each other's likes and dislikes.
Now is no different; in fact, the atmosphere feels even more heady since Wanda recently received the embryo implantation. Lifting your wife’s hips slightly off the bed and putting the rest of your weight on your knees, you begin thrusting into her in slow, deep strokes. You make sure to pull out with just the tip of the strap inside, before pushing back in with more force. You repeat the action with rapt attention and soon, the unmistakable sound of wetness fills the room—a rhythmic squelching accompanying every thrust of the strap. 
“God, Wanda,” you groan, feeling the wetness of her coating your cock, watching it trickle down her soft thighs, “You're so fucking wet, you’re dripping.”
She lets out a throaty moan, her voice dripping with lust, “Because of you.” Wanda's own hands move to the roundness of your ass cheeks. She grips them tightly, nails digging into the flesh, urging you with a silent plea to drive into her with more force. You struggle to keep your eyes open, even as pleasure begins to stir in the depths of your stomach. They trail over Wanda's body, taking in every exquisite detail. The soft, blue hue cast by the moonlight makes her skin look even more ethereal, highlighting the slight sheen of sweat that has formed on her forehead and neck. The delicate curve of her breasts draws your attention, especially her tight, pink nipples that stand erect in the heat of the moment. You take a deep breath through your nose, inhaling the scent that is distinctly hers, a mix of sweat, arousal, and the lingering fragrance of her perfume. 
Her lips, plush and rosy, are half-parted, soft moans escaping them every time you move within her. But it's her eyes that capture you the most. They dart to yours every now and then, holding your gaze, the vulnerability in them enough to make your heart race. As you continue to move, you notice the little details—like the way her face scrunches up in sheer pleasure when you angle yourself to hit that particular spot deep inside her. The way she bites down on her lower lip, trying to muffle a particularly loud moan. You're hopelessly enthralled by her, that sometimes you toy with the idea that you can cum just by looking at her, by filling your senses with everything that is Wanda Maximoff.
In the heat of the moment, you allow yourself to be fully immersed in the experience. You imagine the strap is a part of you, a real extension of your own flesh, and you feel—or at least, you pretend to feel—every ridge, every hot, slick part of her clenching around you.
Wanda whimpers on cue, as if reading your thoughts. “I want all of you. Now.”
Suddenly, you feel her fingers drawing slow circles around your rim, teasing the sensitive skin there. The unexpected sensation makes you gasp, your rhythm faltering momentarily. “What are you—?” you start, only to be silenced by her lips crashing onto yours.
The kiss is fiery, desperate, and when you pull away, she whispers, “More.” 
You comply, thrusting with renewed fervor, driven wild by her touch and her words. “I'm close,” you gasp, the coil in your belly winding tighter with each thrust. You're slicker, your thrusts becoming deeper, and with a particularly hard drive, you're pushed deeper inside her than you'd imagined possible.
“Do it,” she moans, her middle finger slipping inside your ass, “cum inside me.”
Wanda's inner walls clench tightly around the toy, signaling her own impending release. Her legs lock around your waist, pulling you in even deeper, and you can't hold back any longer. With a strangled cry, you climax, your body shaking with the force of it. You bury your face into the crook of her neck, biting down on the spot where her neck meets her shoulder, leaving a mark that will surely be visible tomorrow.
The two of you ride out the waves of pleasure together, your breathing ragged and in sync. But the moment of rest is brief. Sensations still course through you, and with a sense of boldness, you start moving again, this time at a pace that leaves both of you breathless.
“W-wait,” Wanda stammers, her body already trembling from overstimulation. “It's too much.”
Instead of slowing, your fingers deftly find her clit, beginning to circle it with precision. Her protests turn into moans, her body arching up to meet each of your thrusts. And then, with a gasp and a shuddering sigh, she comes undone beneath you once more.
Moments later, her eyes flutter open, and there's a look of sheer astonishment and satisfaction in them. “You... you're incredible,” she breathes. “I've never felt so full, so complete.”
“You did so well, love,” you whisper, brushing a stray strand of hair behind her ear. “You took everything I gave, and you looked absolutely stunning doing it.” Unable to resist, you lean down to capture her lips in a tender kiss, before your hand moves to caress her belly. “I love the idea of filling you up,” you murmur against her lips.
She chuckles softly, her fingers tracing patterns on your back. “I noticed,” she teases.
Not ready to break the connection just yet, you wrap your arms tightly around her, savoring the closeness. And with a gentle roll, you shift positions, with Wanda now on top of you. The toy remains in place, and you both shiver from the sensation, even as the urgency of earlier has mellowed into a languid post-orgasmic haze.
Wanda nuzzles her face into the crook of your neck, her soft breaths tickling your skin. “Let's just stay like this,” she whispers, her fingers lazily drawing circles on your chest.
“You know,” you muse aloud, a dreamy quality to your voice, “I’ve always liked the name ‘Elena’ for a girl. And maybe ‘William’ for a boy. What do you think?”
Wanda giggles, her breath warm against your neck. “Already thinking about baby names, are we?”
You shrug, feeling a bit bashful. “I can't help it. I'm just... excited, you know?”
She pulls back slightly, looking deep into your eyes with her own sparkling ones. “I know, darling. But remember, it's only been a week since I got the implant. We don't even know if I'm pregnant yet.”
You sigh, the reality of the situation sinking in. But then a stubborn grin forms on your face. “How about we make sure you are?” you say as you gently rock your hips upward.
Wanda gasps, her cheeks reddening. “You do realize that's not how it works, right?” But even as she says it, you can notice her gaze already darkening.
“But it doesn't hurt to... practice, right?” you whisper, your movement becoming more deliberate.
Wanda bites her lip, considering, then nods with a smirk. “Alright then. Let's 'practice'.”
-
It’s the third attempt that ends with Wanda not being pregnant. To be sure you're doing everything right, you and Wanda decide to visit a different reproductive endocrinologist.
The sterile walls of the clinic, coupled with the waiting room's soft music, can't quell the anxiety bubbling up inside both of you. You glance at Wanda, her fingers drumming a nervous rhythm on the armrest.
Soon, a nurse calls you into the doctor’s office. It’s more welcoming than the antiseptic hallway outside. A tall, thin woman with a kind face and graying hair greets you both with a warm smile. “Hello, I’m Dr. Adams. Please have a seat.” She gestures to two comfortable chairs opposite her desk. You both take a seat, and she flips through Wanda's medical charts, scanning the numerous notes and test results. After a few more minutes filled with the sound of pages flipping and muffled conversations outside the room, the doctor finally looks up, focusing specifically on Wanda.
“I’ve gone over your charts and the lab results,” she starts evenly. “Everything looks promising. The numbers, hormone levels, all of it—it’s in the range we’d hope for. In clinical terms, you're a great candidate for conception.”
You and Wanda release a synchronized breath; Both of you have been overthinking this, searching for any fault, so it's reassuring to hear that everything is not only normal but also as it should be—perhaps even great.
Dr. Adams continues, “However,” she leans forward, “conception, in my personal belief, isn’t solely a game of numbers. God, or whatever higher power one might believe in, still has a say. There’s a mysterious element, a touch of magic, if you will, in the process.”
Wanda nods, her eyes a bit watery, “We just want to be parents. It's been harder than we imagined.”
The doctor nods, clasping her hands together. “I understand. I always tell my patients, 'Do your part and let the universe handle the rest.' It might sound a bit philosophical, but I've seen countless stories of hope and miracles throughout my career.”
Squeezing Wanda's hand, you're buoyed by the hope in those words. In return, she offers you a tight smile.
“With that said, let’s go over your treatment plan. It says here in your clinical history that you’ve been on COH for a while now, so let’s just retain that as we might need to harvest a new batch of eggs again
“We'll also introduce a GnRH Agonist, probably Lupron, to make sure there's no premature egg release. And as a precaution, we might add a GnRH Antagonist like Ganirelix.”
“And after you retrieve the eggs?” Wanda asks, hoping for something different, something that could easily be the missing piece in all of this.
Dr. Adams smiles gently, “Then, we'll give Progesterone, perhaps in the form of an injectable or a vaginal gel, to prepare the uterus for the embryo implantation. And we may supplement with Estradiol for the uterine lining, especially if we consider a frozen embryo transfer later."
She pauses, completing the prescription as she continues speaking. “Around the embryo transfer, I'd also recommend antibiotics and possibly a low dose of steroids to enhance the chances of implantation.”
You both exchange glances, feeling as though you're back at square one. Dr. Adams catches the look shared between the two of you. “I understand your apprehension,” she says, “and it might feel as though we're taking a step backward or starting all over again. But sometimes, we need a new approach or a minor tweak in the process.”
You rub Wanda's back soothingly, but you can feel her muscles tense beneath your fingers. The medical jargon, the never-ending cycle of hope followed by despair, it all starts to blend into one blurry narrative. You take the prescription from Dr. Adams, thanking her for her time and insight.
At home, you both decide to take a break from the overbearing thoughts and treat yourselves to a quiet, simple dinner. 
-
You’re about to reach for the strap when Wanda stops you.
“Can we maybe... just for tonight—” Wanda's gaze meets yours, her lip caught nervously between her teeth, her eyes searching for your response as if she's made a misstep. “Just... just you. That’s all I need. Please?”
You place the strap aside, focusing solely on her.
“Okay, okay,” you whisper back, fingers delicately skimming the contour of her cheek, absorbing the heat of her flush. “Just us.”
You keep your gazes fixed on each other as you slowly guide her back onto the bed. The look in her eyes tells you she needs more from you—not just the need to come. You desperately want to tell her that whatever it is, she just needs to ask. Or that you wish you could understand her unspoken needs, so she wouldn't have to voice them, and you'd still fulfill them. But somehow, words fail to leave your lips.
Frankly, words have been failing you for quite some time now. And so, you let your mouth and your fingers do the talking.
-
“So?” you ask, not lifting your gaze from the crib you've been assembling for the past thirty minutes.
Wanda simply shakes her head, discarding the pregnancy test into the trash. For eleven months, you've both been diligently adhering to every guideline—tracking ovulation cycles, maintaining the prescribed diet, optimizing sleep schedules, even monitoring the daily water intake. You've both undergone all necessary tests for IVF, from basic hormone assessments to detailed embryological evaluations. Despite all efforts and precautions, Wanda still isn't pregnant. Of course, there's a pang of disappointment, but giving up isn't an option. 
“We just have to keep trying.”
Wanda scoffs as she pours herself a glass of water. Sparky scuttles up to her, hoping for a fallen morsel. “Easy for you to say.”
Distracted by her remark, you shift your focus from the wooden pieces that refuse to align. Your brows knit together, and your lips pull into a slight frown. Meanwhile, Sparky trots over and nudges your leg with his snout. “What do you mean by that?” you ask Wanda, while absentmindedly patting Sparky's head.
Wanda’s silence is a more powerful response than any words could have been, but she quickly sidesteps the tension in the room by changing the subject. “Do you want bacon?” she asks, her eyes focusing on arranging the ingredients on the counter.
Baffled by the sudden shift, you answer, “We don't have bacon. We've been on that strict diet, remember?”
“I picked some up yesterday,” she replies, her voice a tad too casual as she avoids eye contact, focusing instead on cracking an egg into a mixing bowl. You study her for a moment, sensing there's more beneath her words. 
“Wanda,” you begin gently, “talk to me.” She remains silent, but her grip on the pan's handle speaks volumes.
With no response from Wanda, you release a resigned sigh and refocus on the crib you’ve been struggling with. An insight strikes and you manage to align the elusive pieces. As you start hammering them together, the sound ricochets across the quiet morning—a rather unpleasant sound.
The clamor clearly irks Wanda, causing her to hurl the turner onto the sink with a resounding clang that captures your attention. The sudden motion startles Sparky, who retreats to a corner with a soft whine.
She spins around, her chest heaving with pent-up emotions. “You want me to talk? Fine, I'll talk. Why did you tell Natasha we were trying to have a baby?”
Your hammering ceases abruptly. Her rage blindsides you. It's true, you had shared your hopes with Natasha as early as a month into trying with Wanda. But that was a long time ago, why was this a problem now?
“You know Nat is like a sister to me, and I didn't think it would be an issue,” you try to explain. “It’s been so long since then, why bring it up now?”
Wanda’s face contorts as she struggles to hold back tears. “Because last night, she looked at me with pity, with sadness... I don’t want people’s pity!” she cries out. You set down the hammer and walk towards her.
“I promise, Nat doesn't pity you,” you say, taking Wanda’s hand. She struggles against your grip for a moment, but you don't let go. Eventually, she gives in, and you pull her into a hug. “But I'm truly sorry for sharing without your consent. That was my mistake.”
When you pull back, she doesn’t meet your gaze, her eyes fixed on the crib behind you. It's a beautiful piece, elegant in its design, something any parent-to-be would cherish. But for now, it only makes Wanda seethe even more.
“Natasha gave us that crib, didn't she?”
You nod, remembering the day when Natasha had surprised you both with the gift, her way of showing support for the new chapter in your lives. “Yes, she did. Out of love, Wanda.”
But Wanda’s eyes blaze, her voice breaking, “While you feel gratitude when you see it, all I feel is pressure. You know what I see when I look at it? The symbol of my failure. I feel like I'm letting you down, and now with Nat knowing, I have another person I feel I’m disappointing.”
You’re heartbroken hearing her express her anxieties. You had no idea she'd been carrying such a burden. Pulling her close, you hold her tightly. “I don't ever want you to feel that way. We're in this together, no matter what. And nobody—not even Nat—can make us feel less than.”
Wanda buries her face in your chest, allowing herself to release the pain she's been holding back. She clings onto you, her fingers gripping the fabric of your shirt as she seeks comfort in your reassurances. “Don’t you ever leave me,” she murmurs amidst her tears. “I just want to make you happy.”
Your lips press tightly together. Of course, you'd never consider leaving Wanda. The thought wouldn't even cross your mind. Where is all this coming from?
“You do make me happy, every single day,” you reply, your words soaked in the truth of your love for her, “with or without a baby, our happiness is crafted by the love we share, not by the expectations of others or the gifts they give.”
“And you love me?” Wanda asks.
Gently cupping her face in your hands, you make sure she’s looking directly into your eyes when you say, “Every inch, every fiber, every moment.”
Her eyes search yours, a shadow flickering within them that you can't quite pin down. After a long beat of silence, she whispers, “Okay. Then return that crib to Natasha.”
-
Natasha's apartment is a study in minimalist elegance with clean lines and straight forward colors. You ring the bell, adjusting the large box you're holding, and rehearse the speech in your head. After all, you've never returned anything Natasha has given you before.
The door swings open, revealing your best friend in a tattered shirt, her hair pulled back into a high ponytail. She eyes the box, then shifts her gaze up to meet yours, arching an eyebrow. “That's...a large box.”
“It's the crib,” you state simply, seeing no reason to beat around the bush.
Her eyes flash with understanding and perhaps a hint of curiosity. “Come in.”
You push the box through the door with some considerable effort and take a seat on her plush sofa, noting how her living room has changed since your last visit. New artwork on the walls, a couple of throw pillows that weren’t there before.
Natasha takes a seat opposite you. “How's Wanda?”
“She's... coping,” you reply with a bit of hesitation. “Some days are better than others.”
After Wanda confronted you about sharing the private details of your married life with your best friend, you've been extra cautious about what to share and what not to. With people like your boss Scott or your colleagues at work, it's easy. But with your best friend, it's hard to hold back, especially when she's the only other person you turn to for advice and confide in.
Natasha nods in understanding, her sharp eyes analyzing you. “You look...fit. More so than the last time I saw you.”
“Yeah, been on a restrictive diet to help Wanda keep hers. Thought it'd help her with food temptation if I joined in.”
She smirks, “That's sweet. But is that the only reason?”
You smile sheepishly, rubbing the back of your neck. “Well, initially, yes. But I've started enjoying my time at the gym. It makes me feel... more confident, I guess. And it's been a good distraction, especially with all the stress at work.”
“That’s good to hear,” she says, her gaze flitting towards the box. “But what’s up with the crib?”
Taking a deep breath, you began to recite the rehearsed explanation about your mother wanting to gift you a crib, how it seemed redundant to have two, and how—but Natasha cuts you off with an amused chuckle.
“Come on, Y/N,” she grins, shaking her head. “I’m not buying that crap. Just tell me the truth. I won't be offended.”
“Alright,” you start, dropping the facade. “Wanda's been finding it hard. The crib... it’s like this looming symbol of expectation and pressure for her. We’ve been trying for months and it's been weighing on her. And, honestly, on me too.”
Natasha’s eyes soften at your admission. “I can’t even begin to imagine how tough this must be for both of you,” she says. “But let me ask you something, Y/N. How do you feel about all of this? Not just the crib, but Wanda not being able to get pregnant?”
For a moment, you appear deeply engrossed in thought, gazing at the box and the unfinished crib, then your eyes shift back to meet Natasha's. “It's difficult. Every month, there’s this hope, this expectation. And when it doesn’t happen, it’s... crushing. Not just for Wanda, but for me too. I watch her go through it every time and it kills me that I can't do more to help. That being said, I don’t blame her, nor do I see her any differently. I love her, no matter what. But it's hard to watch her go through this pain.”
“Does she know that?”
You’re about to say yes but then your most recent argument with Wanda stops you.
Don’t you ever leave me. I just want to make you happy.
It’s clear that you haven’t been telling her enough. Maybe a part of you doesn't want to admit that there's a twinge of disappointment, or that you've started to believe you could be the one to try in her stead. But you haven't shared any of this with Wanda. In keeping silent, you mistakenly thought you were reassuring her. Wrapped up in your career, you've been blind to the emotional strain it's placed on your wife, how it's shaken her self-esteem and her trust in your love.
Maybe you'd been too caught up in your own head, too busy trying to protect her, and in doing so, inadvertently pushed her away.
“I mean, I thought she knew,” you say with a shaky sigh. “But maybe I haven't been clear enough. I've been trying to maintain a positive outlook, you know? But I think I messed up.”
After a pause, Natasha rises and offers, “Want a beer?”
You nod, then lean back, exhaling audibly. “I'm even thinking about... you know, maybe I should be the one to try. But I'm scared it'll seem like I've given up on her.”
Natasha's eyes widen slightly as she hands you a cold can of beer. “Whoa, that's big. But just, when you talk to her about it, make sure she knows it's 'cause you two are in this together. Not 'cause you think she can't. And is…that what you want?”
“We want kids, Nat.”
“But does it have to happen now?”
You pop open the beer and take a deep sip before responding. “I mean, I don't think either of us envisioned it would be this hard. It's just... We both felt ready, you know? And after all the effort and disappointment, it's not easy to just push pause.”
“I don’t know, Y/N… Sometimes life throws us curveballs, and we've got to decide if we want to swing or wait for the next pitch.”
“You've been hanging around Clint too much.”
Natasha grins. “Maybe. But seriously, what's the rush? If the universe is telling you something, maybe it's worth listening.”
You look down at the beer can, condensation slipping down its side. “I just hate seeing her hurt. Every negative test, every failed attempt, I can see how much it's breaking her.”
“Then talk to Wanda,” Natasha says. “Ask her what she wants. Stop making assumptions and trying to fix everything.”
The thing is, you don't want to give up. That's probably why you're so nervous about mentioning to Wanda the idea of pausing and rethinking things. You've been self-centered for too long, and as much as Wanda wants to make you happy, you need her to be happy too.
“Thanks, Nat. It means a lot,” you say, rising from your seat. Just as you're about to reach the door, Natasha's voice stops you.
“I'll hold onto the crib for when the time's right, okay?”
-
You are startled awake from a light slumber by the sound of soft moans beside you. As your eyes flutter open, you see Wanda, her hand moving frantically under the sheets. The sight sends a warm thrill down your spine, but you notice her face turning a shade redder as she realizes you've woken up.
“Oh, I-I didn't mean to wake you,” she stammers, trying to pull the sheet over her actions, but you catch her wrist gently. It hurts a bit to realize that Wanda tried to hide her actions from you. It's in this moment you recognize you've been neglecting her physical needs as well, and you can't remember the last time you made love to her in earnest.
“Hey, it's okay,” you whisper reassuringly, your sleepy eyes now more alert and focused on her flushed face.
You reach over to the nightstand and turn on the lamp. Now, with better visibility, you can see the sheen of sweat on her forehead, her lips slightly parted as she bites down on her lower lip to stifle any further sounds.
“Sorry,” she mutters again, looking away shyly. “I didn't think I'd wake you.”
“No need to apologize,” you respond softly, your heart pounding against your ribcage. “Can I... can I help?”
Wanda nods her head bashfully, her breath quickening. You smile inwardly; you've lost track of how many times you've done this to her, to each other, yet there’s still this little dance you do even though you both know what it’s going to look like within the next hour.
You can tell she's probably expecting your fingers, which is why when you maneuver yourself down to the foot of the bed, her eyes widen with a blend of surprise and arousal.
You settle between her legs, taking a moment to admire the goddess before you. As you slowly slide off her panties, you take the opportunity to press tender kisses along her trembling thighs.
“You're so beautiful,” you murmur against her skin, feeling her shiver under your touch. “You smell so good, so delectable.” She whimpers softly as you continue, “You've been such a wonderful partner, Wanda. You complete me in every way.”
Wanda is enough. Whether the path to pregnancy is smooth or rocky, what matters most is this—the life you share together, the bond you’ve formed over the years. You'd rather have her happy and content, than stressed and miserable over what might not be.
Without further ado, you delve into the act of worshiping her with your tongue, making her gasp and clutch the sheets beside her. Her name falls from your lips like a prayer as you navigate through her soft folds, each stroke of your tongue eliciting a beautiful melody of moans and sighs from her.
You don't consider yourself particularly religious, but you send a silent thanks to whoever might be up there, that you get to experience everything with this woman—for better or for worse.
-
“Branch manager? But I thought—”
“You need the experience, Y/N, so I can properly recommend you for an AVP position,” Scott says, adjusting his tie—a habit you've observed he resorts to in awkward moments.
You blink in surprise, trying to process the unexpected turn. “Scott, that's... I'm honored, truly, but I was under the impression that the AVP position was nearly within my grasp.”
He exhales, avoiding direct eye contact. “Look, Y/N, you're incredibly talented, and everyone knows it. But there are some procedural checkboxes we need to tick, and having branch managerial experience is one of them.”
“But there must be some catch to this 'promotion', right?” you ask.
Scott shifts uneasily in his chair before replying, “Well, there is a trade-off. You'll be temporarily relocated to Westview, New Jersey.”
“Westview?”
He nods, “The branch there needs significant improvement, and the higher-ups believe you're the best person for the job. They would be immensely grateful for your expertise.”
Swallowing the sudden lump in your throat, you inquire, “How long do I have before the move?”
“Less than a month,” he admits, sounding apologetic.
The prospect of relocating, even temporarily, is daunting, especially given the current circumstances at home. You haven't even touched on the idea of perhaps pumping the brakes on conceiving with Wanda, and now this added responsibility looms ahead.
-
You push open the front door of the apartment, immediately hearing Sparky's playful barks. Wanda is lounging on the living room couch, a bowl of green salad in her lap. She's back on her restrictive diet, you note, and she looks more refreshed than she has in weeks.
Attempting to be discreet, you try to slide the platter of sushi behind a cushion, but Wanda's observant eyes catch the movement. “Is that...sushi?”
Ah, there it goes—your surprise. “Um, yeah,” you mutter, bringing the platter around, “I thought maybe we could enjoy something different tonight.”
Her eyes dart between the sushi and your face, the question clear in her eyes. You sigh, deciding to cut to the chase. “I think maybe we should...take a break from trying. Just for a little while.”
Wanda looks stunned, and before she can say anything, you continue, “It’s taking a toll. On both of us, but especially on you. And with this new opportunity at work, which requires me to relocate temporarily…”
She’s silent for a beat, and then you see her eyes well up with tears, the dam breaking as she cries softly. It's a quiet cry, one of acceptance and understanding, but it still breaks your heart.
You pull her into a hug, letting her tears soak through your shirt. “Hey, it’s just a pause. And it’s a chance for us to enjoy things we’ve missed,” you say, holding out the platter of sushi toward her.
She looks at the platter and then at you, her tears mingling with a soft smile. “I've missed sashimi,” she whispers, her voice cracking.
You smile back, wiping away her tears. “And I've missed seeing you enjoy it,” you reply tenderly.
With a small sigh, she picks up a piece, enjoying the flavor that she's missed for so long. You both know that this pause doesn’t mean giving up—it's just a small detour. You’re looking forward to a new chapter with the move to New Jersey. Who knows, maybe if things in your career stabilize, you can discuss with Wanda the possibility of you being the one to carry. It's a delicate suggestion, for sure, but deep down, it kind of feels like that might be the way things should go.
But still, you can't help but ask—
“Hey, we're okay, right?”
Wanda seems to search for words for a moment before answering. Her eyes, now clear, meet yours with a fondness that's always been there.
Her hand reaches out to hold yours, and you latch onto it, feeling your need for her to stay grounded.
“We’re okay.”
-
A/N: Yeah, we all know what happens next...
662 notes · View notes
nickfowlerrr · 1 year
Text
the truth is this
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pairing: bucky barnes x curvy!reader (friends to lovers)
warnings: fluff, kissing, very slightly edging on heavy petting, mention of an erection, no smut but still 18+ only.
words: 2.9k
notes: loosely based on these prompts: platonic forehead kisses starting to give u the feels. LIKE ITS SOMETHING MAGICAL. and "is that really all 'A' is to you?" thank you so much to @anthony-sharma for the request! thank you in advance for reading and as always, feedback and reblogs are more than welcome and so appreciated!
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"So you're telling me you didn't notice the way she was looking at you just now?" Sam asked skeptically.
"I'm telling you I have no idea what you're talking about," Bucky rebuffed, his brows furrowing in agitation.
"Well I do know what I'm talking about. I'm talking about you and her finally pulling your heads out of your asses and realizing you like each other."
"No shit we like each other, Sam. She's one of my best friends."
"Is that really all she is to you?" he questioned pointedly.
Bucky stopped in his retreat as he took in Sam's words. He instantly knew his answer, but still told himself had to think about it. Because although his thoughts were flowing with all of the things you were to him, all things that went way beyond the scope of just friendship, he was still too scared to admit it to himself, let alone anyone else.
Sam watched as Bucky swallowed hard, his jaw tightening and brows furrowed even more. It looked as if he was blinking away his thoughts when he finally looked back at Sam. An annoyed look taking over his features once again. He didn't say anything, just grumbled in response before he continued out of the room.
For nearly three hours after the little confrontation he had with Sam, Bucky raged with himself in the privacy of his own room. His head was swirling and he could barely keep track of what part of him was winning the argument until a knock came on his door.
Not just any knock, your knock. Somewhere in the back of his mind he was expecting you, he had just lost track of time with the internal struggle he had been trying to sort out.
Something changed, though, when he heard you. All thoughts of not acknowledging his feelings, in part to not wreck what he already had with you, went right out the window.. kinda.
He could accept the true depth of his feelings for you, but he'd be damned if he spoke them aloud until he knew that there'd be no shot at hurting your friendship if you didn't feel the same.
Sam's words came back to him as he considered that you didn't. The way she looked at you...
How had you looked at him? Were all the signs there and he was just blind to them? Well, he'd be sure to pay close attention tonight. See if he could see what Sam saw.
He got to the door and opened it for you, greeting you with a smile as you walked into his room and instantly wrapped your arms around him in a tight hug. When you pulled back ever so slightly, peering up at him with sparkling eyes, Bucky swore he felt himself get weak in the knees.
Your smile was the most beautiful thing to him. He'd do anything to get one out of you, though he really didn't have to try all that hard. Your usually stoic demeanor, or resting bitch face as Kate had called it, was rarely ever broken; but as the rest of the team noticed long ago, Bucky seemed to have a knack for breaking it quite easily.
It was like you just couldn't help your smile when he was around. You'd always get more talkative and seemed a lot more approachable than when you were alone. It wasn't like you were a mean person, far from it, you just had a bit of an intimidating presence most of the time. You were a quiet person and weren't typically the most open. It wasn't something you put on, it was just your natural disposition. One of the reasons you and Bucky had gotten so close so quickly was because he was one of the only people to not have been put off by your introversion; he wasn't hesitant to talk to you, in fact, the moment he had seen you, he just had this feeling that you and him would get along swell. And he was right.
He'd gone up to you and introduced himself, and you gave him your name with a small smile in return. You and Bucky had a lot in common and though it took you a little while, you soon found yourself more comfortable around Bucky than you had been with anyone else...ever.
You guys could talk for ages and never bore, or you could sit in each other's silence comfortably for hours on end, not needing anything other than each other's company.
Neither of you realized how close you had gotten or how you appeared inseparable until it started getting pointed out by everyone else.
Repeatedly.
Over and over again.
Whether it was playful jokes at your mutual expense during meetings, or pestering whispers in your ears by your friends trying to bring your attentions to what everyone else could already see, to what everyone had seen from the very start of your and Bucky's friendship: That it was so definitely more than just friendship.
He wasn't sure what it was about Sam's comments this time that finally had him taking it seriously. Maybe it was because he felt it too. And truthfully, he always had, but maybe he just couldn't keep pushing the thoughts away. Maybe... maybe it was because he knew deep down, the love he felt for you was way more than just platonic. Maybe he finally realized that he was well and truly in love with you, and maybe he had a bit of hope burning bright that you felt the same way.
Bucky collects himself as he gazes into your eyes, feeling like if he stares too long he'll lose himself to you completely. But he really doesn't think he'd mind one bit. You pretty much have him already.
"So," you breathe as you begrudgingly pull away from his warmth, "did you decide? Movie or tv show?" you ask as you step past him further into his room.
He shuts his door before turning and following you to the kitchenette where you easily find the stash of candy Bucky keeps for your "movie" nights.
"Uhhh, you pick," he says as you pass him once again, heading to the couch and throwing your stockpile of sweets on the coffee table before you as you get comfortable.
"Okay," you agree, grabbing the remote and scrolling through the titles to find something at least halfway decent to put on.
Your eyes flick over to Bucky and you realize he's still wearing the clothes he had on earlier while you're in your pajamas, like you always are on movie night.
"Why are your clothes still on?" you ask as you peer up at him from your spot on the couch.
Bucky's breath catches in his throat as his heart nearly stops beating entirely, heat rising to his cheeks. In the same moment your eyes widen as you hear yourself and your breath stutters for just a second. Why did you say it like that? you chide yourself. Wishful thinking, some other part of your brain snickers. You push the thought away. Inappropriate.
"Huh?" Bucky asks, though he heard you full well.
"I mean, you're not in your pajamas," you clarify.
"Right, yeah, I uh, I was a bit distracted before you got here," he admits as he absentmindedly rubs the back of his neck. "I'm gonna change, you put something on. I'll be right back."
Bucky changes his clothes quickly and returns to you just as you find something to put on.
You watch him enter the room and laugh as you note that you're kinda matching now. You're both in gray sweats and as you wear a black long sleeve v-neck, Bucky has on a short sleeve v-neck in the same color.
Bucky notices as you do, "I swear this wasn't on purpose," he chuckles as he settles down next to you.
You titter as you start the movie and adjust in your seat to get more comfortable. And by more comfortable, you really just meaning scooting over to be closer to Bucky.
Bucky watches you as you move to be closer to him, smiling to himself as he realizes you're trying to be cool about it, trying to not make it too obvious. It's cute, but he really doesn't mind. In fact, the closer you are the happier he is. Your thigh brushes his as you keep a bit of space between your upper body and his chest.
Bucky fights off the urge to grab your legs and pull them into his lap but he can't fight the urge he has to pull you in closer.
His arm comes around your right side as he pulls you into him. You look up at him in a bit of surprise, but he doesn't return your gaze, he keeps his eyes set on the screen before him.
You blink in wonder before you look back at the screen too. You bite your lip to keep from smiling at his unexpected action and settle into his hold, scootching closer as you recline against him and let his hand rest on the curve of your waist meeting your hip.
You feel like you’d been dropping hint after hint, purposefully, these past two weeks after a long night of talking with Sam and Nat when you were finally able to put a name to your feelings; the realization you had entirely fallen for your best friend was maybe a bit pulled out of you by them but it was true nonetheless.
You’d stopped holding yourself back the way you normally did when it came to touches and hugs lately, hoping maybe Bucky would get the hint and you wouldn’t have to say it outright.. at least not first.
Admittedly, you could feel the tiniest bit of awkwardness - or maybe tension was the better word, between you and him at the moment. Not entirely unpleasant, but still it was there. At least it had been for a minute. But soon as Bucky settled his hand on your hip, that all faded as soon as it appeared. It was completely comfortable, it felt right, being this close to him. Though, truthfully, it always felt right when Bucky around.
As you fought your smile and Bucky’s hand gently squeezed your hip unconsciously, your heart warmed. Maybe he was finally picking up on what you were trying to do and hopefully the reason why.
Sam and Nat had been sure to let you know it was obvious that he felt the same for you, but still you were nervous to come right out with it.
Slow and steady, you remind yourself. No need to rush things anyway. You’d rather him come to the same realization you had on his own time, not yours.
But god, you hoped he really felt the same.
Bucky takes a peek down at you once he feels your eyes are off of him. He smiles to himself at how perfect this is. How comfortable you both are with the more intimate touches, despite neither of you bringing it up. It just feels natural.
So natural, he isn't really thinking much when he leans down and places a gentle kiss to your forehead. When he catches himself doing it, he zeros in on your reaction to it. It's not like he hadn't done it before, but any time he had it was usually in parting, as customary for you guys as a hug.
This was clearly more intimate. A show of affection he wanted to give you, no other reason than that.
He admires the soft fluttering of your lashes and the way you lean further into him, letting your head rest on his chest.
For half a second, he sees you worry you've made a mistake as he pulls his arm from around you but when he gently takes hold of your chin and turns you to face him, time seems to stand still as you gaze at one another.
You wait with bated breath as you search his bright eyes that are gleaming down at you. He can hear the change in the rhythm of your heartbeat and as he lets his eyes flit to your lips, he swears he hears the sharp intake of air you breathe as your eyes fall to his own lips before returning to his stare.
The next thing he knows, Bucky is holding your gorgeous face in his hands before he leans in closer and takes your lips in his. It's slow and gentle as he takes his time savoring your first kiss. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he registers your hands on his as you return the kiss, and it quickly turns a bit more fervent. Like you've both been waiting forever for this exact moment to happen.
You pull your legs up onto the couch as you turn and move closer to Bucky. You're not thinking as you straddle his lap, the kiss only growing deeper and more intent with each second that passes.
Your hands leave Bucky's as you move them to stabilize yourself without full on sitting in his lap, one hand behind his neck and the other on the couch behind him. Bucky's own hands find their place on your hips before he pulls you down, forcing you down on his lap.
You moan into his mouth as he grabs a handful of your ass and you feel him growing slightly beneath you.
You have to break the kiss to breathe, both of you panting heavily as you press your forehead to his, nose to nose as you breathe one another in. You can't help the smile that breaks out on your face as you laugh breathily, gripping his neck as you shake your head in disbelief.
You place a soft kiss to his lips once more as he holds you to him.
"Sorry," Bucky begins, though he looks to be the furthest thing from it as he smiles that charming smile of his. "I just.. I think I've wanted to do that for a while now. It just felt right."
"You don't have to apologize," you smile softly in turn as you play with the stray hairs curled at the nape of his neck. "I think I've wanted you to do that for a while now. And it did," you breathe with a nod, "it definitely felt right."
"I wanna do more of this," he murmurs against your lips after he places another kiss to yours.
"Me too," you agree with a peck of your own. "I think I wanna make out with you," you muse.
One side of his mouth slants up in a smirk as his hands run up your sides, "I think I want you to make out with me, too," he says, amused before going in for another kiss. You both smile into it and you swear your heart is near bursting as your tummy flutters in your happiness.
"There's something I need to tell you first," he says seriously as he parts just slightly from you.
His hands rubbing up and down your back keep you from worrying as he effortlessly soothes you.
He maintains eye contact as you wait for him to continue.
"I think, - no, I know," he corrects himself. "I love you," he breathes your name as part of his confession.
You move your hand from the couch and gently hold his stubbly cheek instead, thumb rubbing over the skin of his cheek softly.
You smile again, holding his eye as you lean into him before you kiss him slow and deep, trying to get all of the things you're feeling across to him, but most namely, the main one. The love.
You part from him gently as he follows you, mindlessly chasing your lips before catching himself.
He blinks up at you as you perch over him slightly.
"I love you, too, Buck," you nearly whisper as you caress his cheek. "This doesn't change anything, ya know," you add.
He furrows his brow in slight confusion at your words.
You laugh lightly at his expression before continuing, "You're still my best friend. Nothing's gonna change that."
"Wouldn't expect it to," he smiles.
It's quiet between you for a moment before you speak again.
"Promise," you urge softly.
"Promise?"
"Promise nothing's gonna change that," you say as you look down at his chest, moving your idle hand to play with the chain you find there.
"I promise, hey" he says sincerely as he puts two fingers under your chin and has you meet his eye once more, "I promise."
"I don't wanna lose you."
"You won't," he reassures you before suddenly turning you both and flipping you on your back as he leans over you. You gaze up at him a little breathless as you titter.
"Okay," you whisper your trust, your arms reaching up to wrap around his thick neck, pulling him down closer to you.
"Okay," he echos before brushing his lips against yours once more.
The movie is long forgotten as you and Bucky spend the rest of the night completely wrapped up in one another. Talking, touching, just being with each other. The way you were always meant to. It was comfortable, easy. And you couldn't ask for more as you felt entirely whole and at peace in his strong arms promising to never let you go.
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cer-rata · 5 months
Text
An incomplete but very angry diatribe about the missed potential of the Star Sapphires
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So back in the day Geoff Johns and co decided to open up the Green Lantern mythos and add some more flavor and expand the concept of sci-fi tech powered by elemental emotion to more than just willpower. Which yes, is not an emotion, we ignore it and move on.
Anyway we got some really cool stuff! A rage tyrant fueled by experiencing incredible injustice on a personal and cosmic scale, whose vendetta twisted him into something terrible. An avatar of greed who was never allowed to have anything, not freedom, not family, not safety, who takes and takes and takes to fill a void that can never be satisfied. A priest who lost everything but presses on through his unshakable hope that the future can and will be better. It's a lot of fun stuff!
So in this great creative re-imagining, they had to do something clever and fun with the idea of an all female corps powered by love right? They took the opportunity to move past the purely romantic, sexual idea of love and the obsessed femme fatale archetype, because they had the chance to really explore different types of affection now that there were a bunch of different avatars with different stories to pull from right?
Right?
Nope! The only Sapphires we ever learn about are heartbroken over a cursed romance like Carol, grieving a dead fiance like Miri Riam, forcibly mind controlled to be one like Fatality, or just Miss Bloss who...kind of said she wanted to join up? No clue what her deal is, as far as I'm aware that's never really explained. And then we just never learn about anyone else, and still haven't. The hell is "The Lost Sapphire"? No idea, we'll likely never know.
It's frustrating because not only is this a glaring example of the depth of plotlines offered to women in comics compared to their male counterparts, but also a wild lack of imagination. Love is one of the most complicated emotions we experience. Fear, anger, hope, all pretty easy to quickly define. Love is multifaceted, cultural, incredibly contextual and a factor in so many different kinds of relationship. Just thinking logically it should be much easier to flesh out the motivations of a group pulling from such a nuanced source of power, versus something as clear-cut as rage. But no, the red lanterns got so many varied reasons for their rage, the male ones especially: Bleez being the woman was of course given the SA narrative, which I don't think is inappropriate on its own, that's an incredibly valid reason to be angry, but as the ONLY truly prominent female Red Lantern it's like...c'mon guys. But still, at least she and Atrocitus had different reasons for becoming what they are, and that variation was played for plot and drama.
But there's not a single Star Sapphire that personally champions something other than romantic love. And before you shoot me, it is explicitly mentioned that they DO protect other forms of love, so there's no reason for them to all be sexy and obsessed with kissing people. There are no Sapphires that are driven by:
The love of their children and families, even in a tragic sense, like Atrocitus and Saint Walker and Larfleez are...
Their love of their people, or their culture. It would have been interesting if Fatality was inducted BECAUSE of her pain at losing her world, but no, they just...replaced her anger with lovey vibes and called it a day.
Their love for nature. Not everyone is social, but social love isn't the only way to strongly experience the emotion.
Their love for themselves. Where is the fun narcissistic ass who loves their own self image to the point of getting powers? It would have been a fun twist and a cool way to get another villainous Sapphire if you wanted to.
Their platonic love of ANYTHING really. Are ace/aro people just...not capable of love then? It doesn't mean anything to be willing to drive cross country to help a friend move just because they needed it and you care? No? You need to be fucking for it to count?
It's like...fascinating if you really think about it. In this vast fantasy universe full of alien races with wildly different perceptions and life cycles, and where the other corps have plenty of non-human, truly alien looking members, that the women's only love corps is full of only hot hot scantily clad baddies. Most love that people experience in their lives isn't even romantic! You will have far more experiences with friends and family members and even loving strangers than you will have with romantic partners.
Like the reason is clearly sexism, duh, but we know sexism is bad, that's obvious, what I really want to make clear is how much this blatant, unexplored sexism just completely desecrated the potential of the worldbuilding here.
From another angle even: Let's say this this WAS the sex and romance all the time corps. Let's say that you wanted to keep it all women. I hate the idea that women are capable of love in a way that men aren't, that's such a bad take and just regressive and unhelpful, but let's just play ball for a moment. They're not even hot? Their designs are such ridiculously narrow versions of feminine attractiveness that they're not even successful at really being mass appeal sexy. I haven't even reached the point of complaining about the fatphobia and criminal lack of different body types yet, I'm still just saying that from the standpoint of fantasy sexy it's not even good at being stereotypical offensive fantasy sexy. It's just boring! They're all so visually boring! You can be scantily clad and still have an interesting and coherent character design! But that is not what they gave these women! They actually redesigned the classic Star Sapphire costume and made it MORE sexist and boring:
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Yeah it was cheesy but it was also cute and fun? The design is playful classic sci-fi girl and this is when she was still a dangerous unhinged villain. Its fun to look at and feels tonally coherent next to Green Lantern.
And then they just...
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No actually, I will not explain this one, you have eyes.
And yeah they fixed her costume finally,
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But! She's still stuck as Hal Jordan's romantic punching bag, and has not gotten to have any new adventures on her own.
So.
What I'm saying is it's a flop all around. 2/10, and only because despite everything Fatality STILL managed to serve. I actually think that all of the corps have been poorly used since blackest night, even the greens actually, but they never even gave the Sapphires a chance. They last showed up in...a WW annual I think? During the whole dark gods event, they needed Diana to help them fight the evil god of love, and there was a guy in the corp finally, and they talked about sisterhood and then we haven't heard a peep from them since. I think Carol might be due to get her ring back in the GL ongoing but she's not really been treated well so far, so I'm not hopeful for anything fresh and well reasoned.
So my lovely ladies (and that one unnamed guy), until they let you get it together it may be time to
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inkmonster21 · 27 days
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I have a request for Noa. Where human reader has been with Eagle Clan for a while. And when a male echo comes and stays for a bit, the reader gets close to him, and Noa doesn't like it. But the reader is only doing it because she thinks Noa wouldn't like a human. But Noa confesses to the reader that he does like her.
I hope that wasn't complicated and it makes sense. 😌
🤣This… I enjoyed this a lot 🤍 thank you for your request! I hope I met your expectations!
AN: my dyslexic ass just reread the request and I totally see where I missed HUMAN MALE and not ape male. My bad y’all! 🥲
~
I Can Do Anything Better Than He Can
Noa x human!reader!
~o0o~
You had travelled along side Mae on the journey to find the divice that could help humans speak again. Help us communicate with others around the fallen world ran by the apes. A lifetime of indoctrination had shaped your perception of apes. You had been taught to fear them, to see them as the invaders who had taken over what once belonged to humans. The idea of understanding or even coexisting with them was a foreign and unwelcome concept in your mind.
Or so you thought.
When the dam exploded and the water rushed in, Mae life you to fend for yourself. Your escape from the flooding vault was a harrowing ordeal, the water rushing in and threatening to consume you. In the chaotic moment, you slipped from the hold you had, falling into the churning depths below, seemingly destined to perish. But then, like an unexpected lifeline, a strong hand grasped your own, pulling you upwards and away from the dangerous current. It was Noa, his grip steady and sure, who had saved you from certain drowning. “I have you.” You still remember his words. No doubt about them.
As you sit alone in your hut, the reality of your current situation sinks in. The very concepts of wrong and right have been turned on their head. Everything you were taught, the doctrines of fearing and hating the apes, seem foreign now. You are now living amongst them, coexisting and interacting with them every day. The realization is both liberating and confusing, a swirling mix of emotions that leaves you questioning everything you once believed to be true.
These creatures, the very beings you had been taught to fear and distrust, have shown nothing but care and kindness towards you. The realization leaves you with a sense of unease, a nagging sensation that everything you had been taught was a lie.
Time had passed, and your life within the eagle clan had become a comfortable and familiar routine. The elders treated you with respect, recognizing your intelligence and resourcefulness. Meanwhile, the younger members of the clan were drawn to your human ways, finding joy in the playful games and activities you brought to their lives. You had found a place for yourself among them, your presence accepted with openness and curiosity.
Noa observes from a distance as you interact with the young apes, a soft smile on his face. There's a gentle affection in his gaze as he takes in the sight of you laughing and playing with the children of his kind. He watches the way you engage with them, effortlessly switching between human and ape gestures and mannerisms. It's a sight that fills him with a mixture of warmth and wonder.
In the countless interactions he had with you, Noa discovered that he was beginning to distinguish your individuality from the collective whole of human society. Your openness and willingness to share your knowledge and experiences intrigued him, sparking a deeper fascination. He found himself not just interested in the history and culture of humans, but more specifically, in the intricacies of you as a person. He longed to understand the nuances of your thoughts, feelings, and perspectives in ways that extended beyond the general human experience. This new fascination both excited and puzzled him.
“You are staring… again.” Anaya teases Noa as they sit together, their duties done for the day. Noa snaps out of his thoughts, realizing that he's been caught once again staring at you. He looks away, a hint of embarrassment in his eyes. "I was not staring… I am watching," he mutters, defensively.
Anaya shoots him a knowing smile, a sly glimmer in her eyes. "Oh, just… watching, hm?" she replies, her tone playful. "You do that lot." Noa huffs, “Echo is here to help teach. I watch. I learn.” Anaya laughs, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "You tell yourself that, Noa," he teases, clearly not buying his excuse. "We both know… something more than just watching and learning.”
Noa struggles to deny the truth, his efforts to repress his feelings proving futile. No matter how much he tries to push them aside, they keep returning with a constant insistence. Every time he looks at you, every time he hears your laughter, the feelings only grow stronger and more intense.
You make a swift escape from the energetic young apes, seeking shelter behind Noa. You giggle, breathless and flushed, your body pressed lightly against his as you use him as a shield. “Help me.” You beg Noa.
The young apes follow you with quick steps, their playful energy undiminished. They spot you behind Noa, their eyes lighting up with excitement as they close the distance. Noa stands his ground, attempting to block the young ones from reaching you. Noa grins at the young apes, his tone playful yet authoritative. "Go on," he says, coaxing the young ones to leave you be. "You have all played with her all evening…Let her rest." The young apes begrudgingly obey his words, their disappointment at their game being cut short obvious, though they reluctantly disperse, off to find other mischief.
You come to sit beside Noa. Resting your head on his shoulder. “Thanks.” You say with a laugh. “They’ve had me running everywhere!” Noa chuckles softly, your head resting on his shoulder sending a surge of warmth through him. "I saw," he responds with a smirk. "Young ones have a lot of energy. Could hear you running around from here."
As Soona takes her seat next to Noa, you reluctantly remove your head from his shoulder, feeling a pang of disappointment as you do. Over the seasons, your feelings for Noa have grown into a full-blown crush. Every moment with him is both thrilling and agonizing, as you struggle to keep your emotions reigned in. But you were not blind, he had such a beautiful bond with Soona. They were sure to find their way to each other one way or another. You wouldn’t stand in the way of that. You couldn't for Noa would not have a human as a mate, as the clan's mother. It was not right.
The sun starts to dip below the horizon, casting long shadows across the village. The air is filled with the hustle and bustle of the clan preparing for the evening. With a final glance at Noa, Anaya, and Soona, you rise from your seat. "I should head back to my hut. I'll see you tomorrow."
Noa's gaze follows you as you walk away, disappearing into the small hut he spent countless days constructing to ensure your comfort. He lets out a soft sigh, a mixture of resignation and longing etched across his features. The thought of spending his nights in that very hut, with you, is a tempting fantasy that he can't quite shake off.
“Echo is going hunting… with Khan tomorrow,” Soona says as she watches her friend's eyes stuck on your hut. Both Anaya and Soona could tell Noa felt something for you.
Noa's gaze is still fixed on your hut as Soona's words reach his ears. He turns to face her, a hint of surprise in his expression. "Hunting... with Khan?" he echoes, his mind momentarily distracted from his thoughts. Anaya and Soona share a knowing look, their observant eyes picking up on the subtle indicators of Noa's feelings without him even realizing.
Noa's eyes narrow slightly, a flicker of confusion and perhaps the slightest hint of jealousy in his gaze. "Why would she go hunting with Khan?" he wonders aloud. "She's always hunts with me..." Anaya and Soona exchange a glance, both silently recognizing Noa's unspoken emotions for you. If they could only get him to stop being so stubborn.
It's Anaya who breaks the silence, her voice gentle but pointed. "Perhaps Echo wants a change of pace," he suggests, a knowing smile playing on his lips. "Maybe wanted to spend time with other apes… not just Noa.”
Noa lets out an exasperated sigh, rolling his eyes at the suggestion. He retorts, his tone a mix of annoyance and growing suspicion. "She knows all of the clan. There's not an ape who does not enjoy her company…Why would she want to hunt with Khan…of all apes?"
Anaya smirks, “Noa is jealous.” He is quickly smacked by Soona with a disappointed glare. "Jealous?" Noa scoffs, attempting to backtrack, his denial not as convincing as he'd like. "not jealous... I do not understand why Echo… would choose to go hunting with Khan… instead of me." Khan, while a decent hunter, paled in comparison to Noa's own skills. Noa knew, deep down, that he could provide you with everything Khan couldn't. The realization only serves to fuel his growing jealousy.
You step out of your hut, greeting the morning with a weary smile. The dawn light filters through the trees, casting a faint glow on your face. A sense of anticipation mixes with exhaustion in your expression, the upcoming hunting trip adding to your weariness but also sparking a hint of excitement.
You make your way through the village, exchanging warm greetings with the apes you pass along the way. As you approach Dar, you come to a stop, a friendly smile on your face. "Good morning, Dar," you say, your voice still tinged with a hint of sleepiness. Dar, as usual, embarrasses you with the fond gesture, her forehead touching yours in a warm greeting. Despite the early hour and your half-awake state, you can't help but smile at her affection.
As you look around the area, a hint of disappointment crosses your features when you don't spot Noa among the apes. You had hoped to catch a glimpse of him before departing on the hunting trip, but it seems he's nowhere to be found.
You turn your gaze to Dar, curiosity and a hint of disappointment in your voice. "Where is Noa?" Dar cocks her head to the side, her eyes scanning the surroundings. "Noa?" she muses. "He was here earlier… was packing for trip.” Your brows furrow but brush it off just as quickly.
You head towards the horses, your mind still preoccupied with thoughts of where Noa might be. As you approach, you spot Khan, diligently preparing his own horse for the upcoming hunting trip.
“Almost ready?”
Khan looks up from what he's doing, a confident smile on his lips. "Almost ready," he responds, his tone assured. "Just a few… adjustments.” He pats the side of the horse, his hand gently grazing its neck in a soothing gesture.
Khan had always been kind to you, a friendly presence in the clan. He would often bring small collections of berries to you and offer his help with gentle gestures. In many ways, he was a good ape, and you found yourself drawn to his affable demeanor. But deep down, you knew that your heart longed for Noa, and as much as you wanted to move on, it wasn't as easy as flipping a switch.
As you're about to mount Khan's horse and feel his touch on your lower back, a familiar voice cuts through the air, making you pause. You turn around to find Noa, sitting atop his horse and looking at you both with a steady gaze. "Care if I join?" he asks, a determined, almost smug expression on his face.
You smile at him and walk a step close to him. Simply drawn to his form. “Noa!”
Noa smiles back at you, his eyes locking onto your form as you move slightly closer to him. Your voice, saying his name, ignites a flicker of warmth within him.
Khan, his expression neutral, considers Noa's request. "Why do you want to come?" he asks, a hint of suspicion in his tone. The two had never been close, simply acquaintances. Noa's gaze is firm as he locks eyes with Khan, his voice carrying a hint of bitter determination. "As the leader… it's my duty to provide for the clan," he responds, emphasizing his role and responsibility.
Khan, choosing not to test Noa's leadership, simply nods in acknowledgment. He extends his hand towards you, silently offering to help you mount his horse. Noa's hand quickly finds your arm, pulling you towards his horse with a firm but gentle grip. "Ride with me," he states, his voice matter-of-fact. He steadies you as you find your balance on the shared saddle, a silent act of declaration.
Riding together wasn't an unusual sight in the clan, but there was something different about this time. There was a sense of forcefulness in Noa's actions, as if he was intentionally asserting his presence, making it clear that he was there, right behind you. As to where Khan was merely feet away, alone, on his horse.
Khan dismounts from his horse and crouches down to observe the tracks on the ground. He carefully studies the marks left behind, his eyes focused and analytical. You slide off Noa's horse and move closer to Khan, crouching down to observe the tracks that have caught his attention. Pointing forward towards the lush forest, you indicate the direction you believe the prints lead to. "This way," you suggest, your voice certain and sure.
Noa, his leadership instincts in full display, takes the lead without a word, striding ahead with an air of determination. He doesn't need to speak; his body language and actions alone convey his confidence and authority. Khan, watching from behind, cannot help but silently scoff at Noa's behavior. It's clear to him that Noa is attempting to assert his dominance, trying to outshine Khan in every possible way.
Khan, determined not to be overshadowed by Noa, moves to walk alongside him, maintaining a similar stance and speed. He doesn't say anything, but his body language indicates that he refuses to be dominated or intimidated.
You trail slightly behind Noa and Khan, your attention solely focused on the tracks ahead of you. You move with purpose, your eyes fixed on the ground beneath you, following the trail that leads deeper into the lush forest. You follow the trail in silence, Noa and Khan side by side. The forest is alive with the soft rustling of leaves and the distant chirping of birds.
Suddenly, a faint sound, a squeal, reaches your ears. It's soft, distant, but undeniably out of place. Noa's ears twitch, expression furrowing in concentration as he picks up on the noise too.
All three of you freeze, your focus shifting to the bushes that had rustled. Noa's sharp eyes zero in on the movement, and he points, a tense whisper breaking the silence. "There!" Khan and Noa immediately sprint through the trees, their trained hunter instincts kicked into gear. They move with incredible speed, their bodies weaving through the forest with ease. The chase is on.
You reach Noa and Khan, your breath slightly labored, just in time to see the two warriors cornering a wild, enraged bore. Its tusks are blood-stained and its eyes burn with fury. The beast is trapped, but it isn't giving up without a fight.
Khan strikes the first blow, his determination to prove himself driving his actions. However, his effort is met with a swift and brutal response from the hog. It charges at him with a ferocious speed, easily brushing off his spear attack as if it was mere child's play.
As Khan cries out in pain and the wild hog continues its relentless attack, you instinctively move forwards to aiding him. However, Noa swiftly grabs your arm, preventing you from getting closer. Noa bides his time, waiting for the right moment, before springing into action to assist Khan. He cautiously approaches the fight, assessing the situation and finding the perfect opening to join the battle.
Noa waits until the boar raises up on its hind legs, preparing to plunge its tusks into Khan. Then, with a swift and fearless move, he throws his spear, aiming it perfectly into the beast. The spear pierces the boar's flesh, and the two start to fight, a fierce struggle unfolding between Noa and the wild animal.
While Khan had been easily overpowered by the boar, Noa was a different story. His strength and agility were much greater, and he managed to stay on top of the hog, struggling fiercely with the enraged beast. Noa, being the skilled hunter that he was, quickly put an end to the animal's suffering. He used his superior skill and strength to overpower and subdue the boar, bringing the fight to a swift conclusion.
Noa, his pride inflated after his successful defeat of the boar, turns around, expecting to find you watching him with admiration and respect. Instead, he sees you by Khan's side, inspecting his injuries with concern. The sight of you tending to the wounded ape triggers a pang of jealousy in Noa.
Khan sits on the forest floor, his expression a mixture of shock and anger. Had his leader really just allowed him to be mangled on purpose? He meets Noa's gaze with an intensity that borders on hostility. The two males lock eyes, the tension palpable between them.
You glance nervously between the two apes, your eyes darting back and forth as the tension between them builds. The air is thick with animosity, and you can feel the hostile energy radiating from both Noa and Khan.
Khan's words are sharp and accusatory as he looks directly at Noa. "You should have helped." The accusation hangs in the air, and you can feel the tension grow even thicker. Noa bristles at the comment, his expression clouding with irritation. Noa, his pride wounded by Khan's accusation, responds with a biting retort. "You could have more hunting skills," he shoots back, his tone laced with sarcasm. The two apes are locked in a battle of wits and male egos now.
You step forward and raise your hands in a gesture of peace, trying to diffuse the growing tension. "Okay, let's just all calm down," you say, your voice steady and calming. You turn to Noa, confusion evident in your eyes, wondering why he's behaving this way. His actions are so unlike him, and it concerns you deeply.
You assist Khan in getting back onto his horse, your touch gentle and supportive. Meanwhile, Noa remains behind, diligently tying the dead bore to the horse to transport it back to the clan. He's eager for the praises he expects to receive from the clan. Tries to push forward a civil expression. However, his emotions betray him and a deeper feeling - jealousy, fueled by his possessive and ego-driven behavior plants in his chest.
You assist Khan in getting back to his horse, your touch gentle and supportive. Meanwhile, Noa remains behind, diligently tying the dead bore to the horse to transport it back to the clan. He's likely eager for the praises he expects to receive from the clan mates. However, his expression betrays a deeper feeling - jealousy, fueled by his possessive and ego-driven behavior.
You look at Khan with concerned eyes, a worried furrow in your brow. "Are you sure you can make it back on your own?" you ask, clearly concerned for his well-being. Khan looks past you, his gaze lingering on Noa for a moment, likely noticing the displeasure on his face. He nods, responding to your query with a determined tone. "Yes… I will make it… it is not far." Despite his injury, Khan seems confident that he can make it back to the clan on his own.
You turn to face Noa, your eyes meeting his in a silent exchange. Khan, still suffering from his injury, rides off slowly and gingerly holds his wound. The air is filled with an uncomfortable silence. Noa expertly tightens the latch on the bore, ensuring it's secure and won't fall off during the journey back to the clan. His hands work with precision, and he seems focused on the task at hand, avoiding your gaze.
You stand behind Noa, your presence silent but palpable. When he turns to see you there, he huffs in annoyance. "You're still here." Your reply is brief and puzzled. "Yeah?" Noa's shoulders hitch as he speaks, his chest heaving with an undertone of jealousy. "Thought you would go back to the clan... with Khan," he reiterates, a hint of possessiveness in his voice.
You're surprised by Noa's possessive and jealous tone. This isn't the first time you've done things with Khan, but it is the first time Noa has witnessed it. You shake your head softly, your expression a mix of confusion and frustration. You respond with a hint of sarcasm and a raise of your brow. "Am I not allowed to have other friends, Noa?" Your irritation is evident as you scoffs at his behavior, challenging his possessive attitude.
Noa's gaze drops to the ground, and he mutters under his breath, sounding bitter and resentful. "Friends..." He clearly has doubts about the nature of your relationship with Khan.
You're absolutely stunned by Noa's bitter words and the tone he's using. You ask in a bewildered tone, "What are you talking about?" You're completely taken aback by his sudden display of jealousy and possessiveness. Noa's voice is firm as he turns to face you fully, his eyes locked on yours. "You and Khan...are not good for… mates," he asserts, his tone filled with possessiveness. "He can not protect you…He can not provide what you need to survive…" His words hang in the air, each one dripping with jealousy and resentment.
You're puzzled by his words and his intense focus on your relationship with Khan. Why did Noa care about who you chose as your mate? The possessive and jealous behavior was quite unexpected and out of character. It left you wondering what was really going on inside his head.
You decide to test him, playing along with the idea. "Why not?" you say with a hint of confidence. "He seems like a good choice." Your words are meant to provoke a reaction from Noa, to see if he's truly as possessive and jealous as he appears to be.
Noa's eyes burn brighter with intense jealousy, his words spilling out in a venomous tone. "Khan is weak...can not do everything...I can do." His stance is rigid, his pride wounded by the idea of you choosing anyone other than him. You meet his gaze, your expression filled with a mix of confusion and skepticism. "You?" you ask, your tone almost challenging.
Noa's demeanor is defensive, his jealousy and possessiveness bubbling just beneath the surface. He takes a step closer to you, his chest heaving with each breath. Noa, his anger and jealousy reaching a boiling point, yells out confidently, "I can do anything better than he can." He practically spits the words, clearly consumed by his intense feelings of possessiveness and superiority.
You can't help but feel amused as a smile slowly spreads across your face. Seeing Noa all worked up and jealous over the idea of you being with someone else was oddly entertaining. You fix your gaze on him, a hint of amusement in your eyes. "Noa?" you ask with a smirk, "are you jealous?" Your question hangs in the air, and Noa hesitates for a moment before responding, trying to mask his true feelings, but failing miserably. Your laughter breaks the tense silence. "Well looks like Anaya was right," you say, a hint of mockery in your voice. Noa's reaction to your words confirms your suspicions, and you're enjoying every second of it.
Noa's expression quickly changes from anger to surprise as you mention his friend Anaya. "Anaya?" he parrots, his tone laced with surprise and disbelief. You continue, saying that Anaya had warned you about him getting jealous, but you hadn't believed it. Noa's confidence wavers as he processes this new information, his jealousy now exposed.
Noa's shoulders sag, clearly embarrassed that his jealousy is out in the open now. He huffs, his expression a mix of irritation and vulnerability. After a moment, he looks at you, his eyes betraying the truth. "Fine, I'm jealous. Happy now?" Noa's tone is laced with a hint of defeat, his pride taking a hit.
You step closer to Noa, your touch gentle as you grab onto his arm. Your voice is softer, no longer teasing. "You shouldn't be," you say, looking into his eyes with a hint of kindness. Noa's gaze drifts away, avoiding yours as he asks, "Why?" His voice is laced with vulnerability and a hint of self-doubt. He's struggling to come to terms with his own feelings, and your words and actions have stirred something within him.
Noa's eyes meet yours as you gently turn his face back towards you. The words you utter, "Because, I like you, Noa," hang in the air, and you can see a mixture of surprise and relief wash over his features. His jealousy seems to melt away, replaced by a softness and vulnerability that was previously hidden.
Noa's eyes widen in surprise as he asks, "What?" He had been so blinded by his jealousy and possessiveness that he hadn't expected to hear those words from you. It was as if his mind was trying to process the reality of your admission. “Was I not clear enough? Who else do I lean on during dinner? Who else do I spend time with?"
Noa's expression turns from shock to a mixture of realization and mild embarrassment. ou can practically see the pieces coming together in his mind. Yes, he had been blind to your actions, but now they were so obvious. The subtle cues, the time spent together - all signs pointing towards your affection for him.
Noa sees the truth in your eyes, the admission of your feelings. "You like… me..." he says softly, his voice filled with disbelief and a hint of relief. The realization slowly settles in, and a mixture of emotions washes over him. There's a hint of surprise, a hint of relief, and above all, a growing affection. He looks at you, his eyes searching your face for any sign that this was all just a cruel joke. But he finds none. You genuinely like him, and the thought makes his heart race. You shrug, “I thought you’d never find an echo… suitable. I figured Soona would be your mate.”
Noa's eyes widen at your words, the mention of Soona bringing back a rush of memories. "Soona?" he asks, his voice tinged with surprise. He'd had a great bond with Soona but had never considered her as a potential mate. More as a sibling.
As his emotions at the surface, he quickly reached for you. He pulls you into his arms, and your foreheads touch in a gesture of deep connection. It's a moment filled with tenderness and intensity as he holds you close, the weight of his affection and relief pouring out through this intimate embrace.
Noa's resolve solidifies, and his grip on you tightens. The thought of you being his, and the whole clan knowing, gives him a sense of possessive pride.
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elliesflower · 2 years
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i saw you in a dream [5]
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summary; you attend ellie's open mic performance. and meet her...roommate.
chapter; 5/? 3.1k words
cw (per chapter); recreational marijuana usage, language
an; hi lol. i love u guys, thank you endlessly for dealing with my slow updating of this story. anyways, i think this may be my favorite chapter yet, please let me know what you think! i love a good cliffhanger ;) (as always, find it on ao3 here)
chapter 4 here
Friday came entirely too quickly—you breezed through your last final exam on Thursday, which left you way too much time to anxiously anticipate your upcoming…event.
“Date!” Dina exclaimed. “Ellie asked you to go because she likes you, it’s practically a date,” she singsonged, twirling a piece of hair around her finger childishly.
“Yes, because I’m sure we’ll have so much time to talk one-on-one and gaze longingly into each other’s eyes in between performances,” you replied sarcastically, continuing to rummage through your closet. “And, you don’t know that she likes me, maybe she just asked me because I was right there.”
“Okay, for someone so smart, sometimes you’re a little stupid,” Dina said, and you shot her the most evil side eye you could manage. “Ellie may or may not like you like that, but she likes you enough to invite you to something that sounds personal and important to her. This is your in! Now, you just have to get flirty.”
“‘Get flirty?’ Do you even know me at all?” You scoffed, turning to face her. “I am, like, the most awkward human being on the planet.”
“Okay, I take it back,” Dina laughed, standing up. “Let’s just focus on finding you an outfit.”
“What the hell do you even wear to an open-mic?” You complained, turning back to continue looking through your closet. 
“You could wear something of mine, if you want,” she suggested.
“Uh, no thank you,” you smiled, pulling out a plain black mock-neck from the depths of your closet, turning around and holding it up to your chest.
“Hey!” Dina gasped. “What’s wrong with my clothes?”
“No offense, but I don’t really think…whatever look you have going on is the one for me.” It’s not that you didn’t like the way Dina dressed, rather, you really did like it—but expressing yourself through clothing had always been hard for you, sticking to more muted tones, blacks and greys. Dina’s wardrobe was loud and colorful, she always looked so put together, and she never seemed to wear the same thing twice. You admired it, really, but still found yourself gravitating towards more basic clothing.
“Whoever said saying ‘no offense’ actually makes a statement any less offensive needs their ass beat, to be honest,” she replied casually, and you could hear her sorting through hangers in her own closet. “Just try this, at least. It would look nice with that shirt, I promise!” She was shoving a colorful chunky-knit cardigan into your hands before you could protest, and you grimaced. 
“I don’t know Dee,” you held up the sweater, contemplating. “I never wear stuff like this.”
“Just put the damn sweater on and let’s go!” She smiled at you. “Don’t you want good seats?”
You rolled your eyes, but went to look in the mirror nonetheless. “As if there’ll be a fight for front row seats at a college open-mic.”
“Oh perfect,” she sighed exaggeratedly before rummaging in her desk drawer. “Then you agree, you have time to split this with me before we leave?” She held up a small, white tube, and you pursed your lips. 
“Okay, fine,” you gave in, quickly pulling your shirt off over your head before pulling on the black long-sleeve. 
“Just one hit.”
You did not, in fact, take just one hit. It was more like four. Or five…or six, or who could keep track, really?
It seemed like a good idea, a little something to take the edge off, maybe soothe the bundle of nerves that had formed in your stomach and in your brain and in your chest at the thought alone of seeing Ellie—god forbid, having to make conversation with her.
And while it did help a little, you hadn’t smoked as much as Dina, so it still felt as though your heartbeat grew louder with each step toward the theater. All that stood between you and Ellie—and, well, a handful of other attendees and performers—was a short corridor. 
“It’ll be okay, just chill out,” Dina tried to subdue you, and her voice was thickened by her intoxication, slower and almost more serious. Her eyes were low as she smiled over at you, bumping into your shoulder softly. 
“Thank you, Dina, because telling someone to chill out always works so well,” you quipped, shaking your head as she led you through the doors. Though, you did try to chill out, as it were, taking a deep breath and sliding the sleeves of the oversized cardigan up your forearms, nervously tugging at the neck of your long sleeve, fidgeting with anything you could think of to distract you from—
“Oh!” You exclaimed as you ran directly into a body around the corner, staggering backwards slightly before someone was gripping your arms, keeping you steady. Your eyes trailed up the body before you were met with—oh god, “Ellie!”
“We have to stop meeting like this,” she laughed melodically, smoothing her hands down your biceps before flashing her teeth at you. The chatter of the other attendees faded into the background as you felt your body heat up under her stare, painfully aware of her hands that were still on your arms. 
You could do nothing but let out an awkward laugh in response, nodding your head as she took her hands away. Dina cleared her throat obnoxiously from behind you and you turned your head to give her a look that you hoped conveyed: please for the love of god save me.
“Hi, I’m Dina by the way, or you probably know me as ‘the roommate,’” she said, sticking out her hand past you for Ellie to shake, and you had to admire her confidence for a second, the way she could unapologetically be herself in any situation. You’d think that from spending so much time with her, some of that confidence would have rubbed off on you, but no, you were still just…you.
“Nice to meet you, Dina,” Ellie smiled, and her voice was laced with honey, rich and slow spilling from her lips. She reached her hand past you to shake Dina’s, and you moved out of the way slightly.
“I’ve heard so much about you,” Dina dropped her hand and stood next to you now. You looked over at her in shock, and you hoped the shaking of your head and wide eyes weren’t noticeable. 
“Uh, not so much,” you laughed nervously, trying to subtly kick Dina’s ankle. 
“Wow, you really do have that guitar player look to you,” she ignored you, gesturing to Ellie. “I love the tattoo!”
Your eyes were daggers glaring into the side of Dina’s head, but neither her or Ellie seemed to notice—though it was debatable whether that was good or bad. Ellie chuckled, instinctively looking down at her arm and holding it out as if to show it off. You felt like sinking into the floor, watching her arm flex as she rotated it, skimming her fingers down the length of her forearm, tracing the pattern. 
“Thank you,” she was slightly bashful, despite her eagerness to show off. She caught your eye for a moment and—were her cheeks turning red? It is pretty warm in here with all these bodies…yeah, that’s it. 
“Well, anyways, nice to finally meet you Ellie, I’m gonna go grab a snack,” Dina smiled politely between both you and Ellie, before patting your shoulder and slipping away. Oh god, why would she leave you to talk to her alone?
“I’m so glad you could make it,” she said, and suddenly everything was fading away again. You took a moment to look down at her outfit, trying to be as discreet as possible. She adorned a light blue flannel, cuffed just above her elbows and a pair of dark Levi’s—her hair was pulled back, save for a few pieces that fell loosely around her face, which you noticed she tucked hastily behind her ear when a strand tickled her nose before she said, “I love that sweater, by the way.”
Dina was going to have a field day with that one. 
“Oh, thank you!” You exclaimed, instinctively wrapping your arms around yourself. She smiled at you before continuing. 
“Anyways, I’m up last, so don’t feel like you have to stay for the whole thing, if you get bored or anything,” she explained, pointing at the stage behind her. “I’m just glad you could make it.”
On the inside, you were swooning, your eyes were in the shape of hearts and you wanted to reach out and embrace her—you wanted to smell that warm vanilla musk and the earthy savor of weed, you wanted to tell her you wanted nothing more than to spend all your time with her, know her inside and out, you wanted it all. 
“No, no, I came here for you,” you said instead, making fists around the material of your sweater and smiling at her. “Of course I’ll stay.” 
Ellie’s face flushed again, and you continued to insist it was due to the heat of the room. She glanced behind her, and you followed her gaze to see Dina filling up a plate with what looked like one of everything from the table. 
“I should go get ready,” Ellie mumbled before turning back to you. “Why don’t you go grab some snacks with Dina and I’ll catch you after the show?” She sounded hopeful. You nearly choked. 
“Yes, I’ll be here!” Of course you’ll be here, where the hell else would you be? You mentally face-palmed yourself before she was giving you a smile and disappearing into the crowd. You took a deep breath and made your way to the snack table, where Dina was still loading up. 
“Oh, hey!” She said when she finally saw you. 
“Hey, thanks so much for embarrassing the hell out of me,” you complained, stealing a cheese square off of her plate. 
“Embarrassing you? Please, I was helping you,” she laughed before stuffing a grape into her mouth. “And it kinda worked, didn’t it? I set you up for a nice little chat with your girlfriend.”
“Oh, shut up,” you bumped her shoulder, but you couldn’t fight the warmth that climbed up the back of your neck. “Let’s go grab a seat.”
The acts that preceded Ellie were actually entertaining—a few songs, a poem or two, and a stand-up act that wasn’t…terrible. Not to say it was good but…you know. 
And then the host, who you assumed was Ellie’s roommate, was waltzing back on to the stage as the audience applauded, her short black hair reflecting almost blue in the spotlight. She was eclectic, all mismatched patterns and silver jewelry that hung from her neck and her wrists and her ears. She was funny and vibrant, commanding the attention of everyone in the room every time she stepped onto the stage to introduce the next act. 
“Alright folks, please give a warm welcome to my best friend, the one and only, Ellie Williams!” She tucked her microphone under her arm before clapping, moving out of the way of the small stool that was behind her. Best friend? Ellie had only said she was her roommate. 
But it didn’t matter, because Ellie was walking on to the stage with her guitar in hand, smiling nervously at the crowd. You clapped as loud as you could, trying to reposition your body so that you could see her slightly better over the heads in front of you, though you doubted she could see you from your seat somewhere in the middle row. 
“Uh, good evening, everyone,” Ellie started, positioning herself on the stool and pulling the microphone down to her level. “I’m gonna sing a little song for you guys, if that’s cool.” There was a bit of scattered applause and Dina whooped loudly from beside you. You smacked her with the back of your hand. 
Your heart was beating out of your chest, partly from the excitement at getting to see Ellie perform, and partly from your second-hand stage fright. Even though you weren’t the one performing, you always seemed to absorb the nerves of the performer, just waiting for them to make a mistake, even if you didn’t want them to. You especially wanted this to go well for Ellie, and you bounced your leg nervously as she positioned her guitar in her lap. 
She strummed the first few chords and you nearly had a heart attack.
C, A-minor, F-major. You could probably play those in your sleep, now. 
“Holy shit,” Dina whispered from beside you, and of course, she knew too, from the hours and hours you spent listening to the song, practicing the song, getting taught the song. 
“Did I drive you away?
I know what you'll say
You say, ‘Oh, sing one we know,’
“Dina,” you whispered back, leaning into her, but not being able to peel your eyes away from Ellie. “Is that…?” But you already knew the answer. 
“Dude. She’s so. Into you.”
“But I promise you this
I'll always look out for you
Yeah, that's what I'll do,
You couldn’t help the smile that slowly spread across your face as you leaned back up, watching Ellie lose herself in the song. Suddenly, you were back in her room, the air thick and heavy, watching her sing softly and strum along when she thought you weren’t watching—that little crease between her eyebrows and the dreamy look in her eyes as she sang with the voice of a thousand angels. 
Maybe you had a hard time believing Ellie was into you, but she picked this song knowing you would be here. There was no denying that. 
“La, la, la, la, o-oh
La, la, la, la, o-oh,
The song ended entirely too soon, and she was smiling, standing up and adjusting the microphone back into a higher position. Applause was erupting from every side of you and you clapped as though you were the only person in the room, as if she could see the intensity in which you showed your recognition and your appreciation and your utter giddiness. 
The host was waltzing on stage again before you knew it, and gave Ellie a hug. You ignored the jealous twinge in your heart, for god’s sake you had literally hung out one time, and the applause continued as she thanked everyone for coming, wrapping her arm around Ellie’s waist and requesting one last round of applause for all the performers. You continued clapping, watching Ellie raise her guitar in the air like a glass of champagne for a toast, before the host whispered something in her ear that made her smile. You again ignored the skip of your heart, instead focusing on Dina’s hand gripping your arm. 
“Oh my god, you have to go say something to her, ask her out, something! The suspense is literally killing me,” she whined, pulling you along as the lights slowly turned back on and people shimmied out of the aisles. 
“I can’t just ask her out, it’s not that easy for me,” you replied.. You wished it was easy for you, you wished you could be more like Dina, just walk right up to her and say: I think I really like you, and we should go out sometime. But your anxiety paralyzed you, rendered you completely helpless when it came to love and lust.
“I swear dude, if I have to sit through any more of your pining and love songs I might request a roommate swap,” Dina said, leading you back to the snack table. “She likes you. And if you can’t see that at this point I don’t know what else to say.” You pouted a bit, like a petulant child, crossing your arms over your chest and surveying the room. Before you could even formulate a response, Ellie was emerging from a group of people who had gathered opposite the table. You quickly uncrossed your arms as she caught your eye and made her way toward you. 
“Oh look, who would have guessed,” Dina muttered, popping a grape into her mouth. She smiled exaggeratedly at Ellie before grabbing a handful of crackers. “I’ll leave the two of you to talk,” and you wished so badly you could flip her off without it being obvious. 
“Hey,” Ellie said quietly, and her voice was almost timid--a laughable comparison to barely five minutes ago when she had the entire audience wrapped around her finger. 
“Ellie,” you breathed, shifting your weight from one foot to another. “Your song choice was…inspired,” you said, wrapping an arm across your body. She looked down at her feet, and you wondered if her cheeks would be rosy when she looked back up. 
“Oh, yeah,” she looked up at you now, and you were right. Except, it wasn’t actually that warm in here. “Well, it’s a good song, you know.” Her hand went to the back of her neck, just like it had before, and you wanted to pull it away, to intertwine your fingers and just tell her, just tell her you want to go out, somewhere where she doesn’t have to teach you to play guitar and you can just talk, and mentally map the freckles that littered her face and learn about how she got that scar in her eyebrow and find out if she’d rather go to a tea house or a coffee shop and fuck, you had to ask her, now, before you lost the courage and your mouth was moving before your brain could catch up, 
“Ellie, I was wondering if--” 
“There you are, superstar!” A voice suddenly came from behind her, and you recognized it immediately. The host--or I guess, Ellie’s roommate--oops, wrong again, Ellie’s best friend, was appearing behind her, grabbing onto her shoulder and looking at her with admiration. Ellie seemed surprised to see her, somehow, as she turned to face her, plastering on a smile that looked…forced. 
“Oh, hey,” she replied, before the raven-haired girl was pulling her into a hug. You stood awkwardly as they embraced, looking down at the ground in an attempt to seem casual. Oh god, you couldn’t believe you were actually about to ask Ellie out on a date. 
“I’m sorry, I don’t think we’ve met,” the girl said abruptly, pulling back as if she’d just noticed your presence. She left an arm around Ellie’s waist, and you noticed the way Ellie suddenly appeared tense. Like, in a bad way. 
You offered the girl a small smile and stuck your hand out politely, giving her your name. She took it and shook firmly, her small hand deceivingly strong. Her eyes were painted with thick, black eyeliner, and they raked up and down your body. You felt like shrinking away under her intimidating stare, averting your eyes after a moment.
“Uh, this is Cat, my roommate,” Ellie said after an awkward pause, giving you a sheepish look. 
“And best friend,” she chimed, pulling her hand away. She leaned into Ellie’s side, resting her head on Ellie’s shoulder and using her free hand to pat her chest. 
“Ellie and I go way back.”
chapter 6 here
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showtoonzfan · 2 years
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I genuinely wish Vivziepop’s gay male characters had more depth to them, and what I mean by that is I’m so tired of her gay characters liking each other simply because of a lust driven relationship and nothing else. I’m so tired of seeing everyone say that she’s so good at writing complex LGBTQ relationships when I legit don’t get it. Obliviously Stolitz is the main centric one, we have no idea what these two even like about each other and what drives them to the other, other than they’re good in bed. They don’t even fucking know each other well, it’s just….0 chemistry.
Then you have Moxxie and Chaz, and they could have been the perfect opportunity for an interesting insight, but Chaz unfortunately is just there so Viv can wave in your face that Moxxie is in fact bisexual, and apparently Mox was only attracted to Chaz because……..he’s hot and they both like dick, like…that’s all I got since they never even explain why he liked Chaz. Such a well written relationship Vivzie BRAVO. I totally believe that Moxxie, someone who’s supposed to be down to earth and the straight soft man, liked Blitzo 2.0, a crude and juvenile character who’s whole personality is that he loves dick and is obsessed with it. They try to pull this thing where it seems like Chaz regretted what he did to Moxxie, but it’s obliviously bs. Chaz only liked Moxxie because of his dick, because his entire character is just “Me sexy and me want sex”. Such great bisexual representation Viv! 🙃
Finally, there’s Fizz and Ozzie. It’s too early to speak on them, but from what we’ve seen in the trailers, I’m glad they actually seem to be diving into how they met, and their relationship. It even seems like they’re genuinely comfortable around each other too, since Ozzie seems to have his own room with the other and let’s him eat and sleep with him. These two might…MIGHT actually be good, right off the bat I like how lovey dovey they are…..like….GASP, a gay relationship that’s love dovey and isn’t just driven by lust or sex?? THIS is what we want Vivzie.
I want your gay characters to be written well, to have chemistry, BELIEVABLE chemistry. I want to see what attracted themselves to the other and how they’re supportive to the other. I want to actually see them passionate with one another on screen, that isn’t just sex related. Have them kiss, or cuddle, or give each other gifts, just show your gay characters actually being AFFECTIONATE of one another, instead of solely relying on the stereotype that they like each other because they both have dicks. It’s so funny because Charlie and Vaggie or Moxxie and Millie are the perfect example of a couple being supportive and affectionate, so why can’t your gay characters be written that way? Why do your straight and female characters get to be actually nuanced relationship wise but your gay characters are reduced down to “ME LIKE DICK LET’S FUCK BECAUSE IT’S HOT”. Hopefully Fizz and Ozzie can break this homophobic stereotypical ass writing but I’m not counting my chickens, Viv sucks at writing gay relationships there I said it.
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greenlotusleaf · 1 year
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((I'm a D&D nerd you got my attention with this game idea!))
I'd most likely be the small petite nerdy spellcaster who's very self conscious about her lack of curves. While on watch one night I was messing with some alchemy to try and help me with my body confidence, but at some point I had accidentally split the potion on you. Thankfully we had just finished an exhausting dungeon so you were in a deep sleep while it absorbed into your skin overnight.
The next morning you felt a little bloated and sluggish, shrugging it off as just being sore and still tired from yesterday's dungeon crawl. I'm constantly looking your way while returning to town praying that you don't notice, the slowly swelling of your body or my stare. You have to loosen the bands and belts on your leather armor, hoping the others don't notice but I do and jot down the effects in my journal while walking. We arrive in town in the late afternoon and you say you're going to head back to the inn, hoping sleeping in a proper bed will make you feel better. I excuse myself from the others a little bit after you do and make my way to the inn as well. Later that evening I hear a knocking on my inn door and to my surprise it's you, you're out of your leathers and in what was once baggy clothes that's now clinging a little tight on your swollen body with little bit of your belly poking out from the bottom. You ask me what's happening to you, explaining the events to your knowledge from this morning and just feeling yourself bloat and get fatter throughout the day. I lie by omitting the fact I'm the one responsible for your new growth and say that I can try and make a potion to try and reverse it. But it being the same potion that start this, using you as an unwitting test subject pushing your grow as long as you'd let me try.
I'm fat, I announce unnecessarily as I push past you into your room, closing the door behind. My body jiggles, wobbles, pushing against my nightshirt as I stride over to sit down on the bed, explaining what I know. I've been getting fatter throughout the day. People are going to start noticing! I grab at my body as I show you the details: the flab on my arms, the little roll when I hold my chin like *this*, the way I can't pull my shirt down to cover my whole belly anymore. And while I don't mind what it's doing to me up *here*, it's a huge problem everywhere else. A *huge* problem. I need you to mix me up some kind of cure, as fast as you can. I'm here in just a nightshirt because I'm already too fat for my pants, and it's still happening. I can feel myself *oozing* out, while we're sitting here talking!
Maybe I'm too trusting, but I drink whatever you mix for me, too lost in my own problems to notice the way your eyes linger on my waist, on the growing plushness of my ass, on the new depth of my cleavage. Worried and exhausted, I fall asleep on your bed in only a nightshirt, thickening thighs exposed, belly slowly imposing itself. You're such a good friend, taking care of me like this. I fall asleep knowing the cure is working, must be working by now. When I wake up I'll be my old self again, light as a feather and quick as the rain. You take notes as I sleep, watching me as I dream, and blow up.
Are your notes about the version of this formula you still wish to try for yourself, or have you shifted your focus, designing new formulas just for me?
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