#they rot my brain from the inside

[platoniccereal]

on the "i was born into this, but i was never supposed to belong here" train of thought, everytime i think allaros would make a pretty decent qunari while having him dating the iron bull, it irreversibly alters my brain chemistry.

bull had to leave because he tried to fit in so much to the best of his abilities, but even with his endless loyalty something was always off. bull sees allaros, and there's this devotion to the role and to people that goes before anything personal, the strict order of things and restraint in smallest details. it's about bas like him, and cassandra, and madame de fer, they've achieved that outside the qun even though the qun promised it's impossible.

bull says, hey, vivienne, hey, cassandra, you would make a pretty decent qunari, hey, are you sure you're not, maybe, just a little bit tamassran, ma'am? bull sees allaros and thinks, hey, maybe the south isn't going just straight to crap with that hole in the sky as fast as i thought. he thinks, maybe i can respect that, exactly because allaros can be judged by the qun's standards.

the iron bull sees allaros, and they're different.

allaros is the reminder of what bull let himself overlook in himself to create a convincing mask. bull starts to respect him, but this is why allaros is the reminder of that if bull doesn't clearly separate what his role is and who he actually is, it would show how far away he's strayed. so bull has to remember that pleasures he found in the south aren't his to enjoy, that he isn't the iron bull.

allaros is the reminder that he is hissrad.

and if bas could be like that without the qun, what does it say about the qun. and if bas could be like that without the qun, what did bull fail to do.

and if bas like the inquisitor or madame de fer have ended up under the qun, he knows the simple truth about the invasion he learned years ago. that the qun is the good idea, but it would shed blood of so many he doesn't want to see that. they would be great qunari, but they would have to show it by taking stitches and serving their arvaad. there's no real place for them under the qun, and in this conclusion bull strayed so, so far away.

and then this very person gives an order a good qunari would disobey, and bull simply does not, and he's declared tal-vashoth. this very reminder in a form of an elf thinks it was a good decision, even though he has no reason to, because these men aren't even his to care about. his reminder puts a few before the duty and alliances, and so does bull.

his reminder of what the good qunari leader looks like is suddenly very bas. it's always been that way, lavellan has never stopped being bas in bas society.

bull is a qunari in the alien land of bas, and it's always has been that way. suddenly, it's much more lonely because in a similarity lies an understanding, but that bas would ever be able to understand him is just another illusion he let himself be amused by.

earlier that would serve to get him in line, now it gnaws on the empty space in his chest.

allaros now is a reminder of an unmeasurable gap between bull and home that understands him, but the one he will never be able to reach again.

then, bull finds out that allaros also always was doomed to not belong. neither to his clan, as much as they care for each other, there's nothing but damage and guilt, nor to his homeland because he loathes orlais. and he would never be a good qunari.

for both of them, their home had no place for them to fit in.

and then, there's understanding.

[moongreenlight]

More childhood best friend!Gaz headcanons because I cannot stop thinking about him

He’s your valentine every single year. Started as his dad trying to teach him proper etiquette when he was young and just never stopped. A bouquet of flowers on your stoop and a cheap card he scratches a note into. Never signs his name. Just ends ‘xx.’

He chaperoned your first real date in high school because your dad paid for his tank of gas. The guy you were keen on never called you back after. It took you until you were seventeen to realize that it was probably because Kyle was sitting on the same side of the booth as you and spoon feeding you bites of dinner.

He also ruined your first real relationship when he beat your boyfriend to asking you to formal (a full two months early). You tried to explain that it didn’t mean anything, but he just couldn’t understand. Kyle said it was for the better while you sobbed into his shoulder. “Tosser can’t cope with the fact he’ll always be second place. Better not to waste your time.”

His basic training was 26 weeks away from home. He went immediately after picking up his diploma. It was the most miserable summer of your entire life. Spent primarily waiting by the mailbox for the postman to deliver your daily letters back and forth. He’s started signing off “Garrick. x.”

Both of your families went to his graduation, but his mother insisted you were the one to tap him out. You barely recognized him, like the summer where his family took a month long vacation and he came back a full four inches taller. He’s bigger now, his shoulders permanently rolled back, but he still carries himself with that same cool ease.

He barely stays long enough to say his hello’s to everyone until he takes you back to the car and lays you out in the backseat. Griping the whole way about how “you’d be in a hurry, too. Couldn’t even get away with a wank in the shower.” And “s’your duty to the country. You wanna thank me for my service, don’t you?” You swear the two of you fit easier six months ago, but now he’s cramped between the seats. Caged in tight. His head bumps the window each time he snaps his hips into you.

You seriously considered moving close to base when you found out he was being permanently relocated after joining the task force, but he wouldn’t hear a word about it.

So you settle on sending each other disposable cameras back and forth. You’ve got a picture of him on a mission in Amsterdam framed up in your hall. He’s got a cigarette hanging out of his big, toothy smile, posing like an overexcited tourist in front of a lingerie shop with a display window that made your ears hot when you first saw it.

He called you a few days after his incident with the helo in Urzikstan. Boasted his adventure with only a whispering tremble on the soft underside of his tough facade. Carried on until you wretched dryly into the receiver. Working yourself up into sick with worry even though he promised he was fine, just sticking to the ground for a bit.

Even though you’re seeing him less nowadays, he’s still somehow coming between you and any romantic pursuits you make. You chalk it up to coincidence most of the time, but a blind eye can only be turned so far.

He seems to have a sixth sense for when you’re on a date or a one night stand. Sending texts and pictures that could be misconstrued as flirty to someone who didn’t know the dynamic at just the wrong moment every time. And there was the one time where he sent flowers to your desk at work just a few days after you’d said something about a coworker getting sweet on you.

It happened so often that you eventually decided that the dating scene just wasn’t for you. Resigned to focus on work and friends. Adopting a new mantra of “if it’s meant to be, it’ll be.”

You’ve got no idea why Kyle is so pleased to hear about the conclusion you’ve come to. Or why he’s suddenly coming back home for a few weeks.

[blackkatdraws2]

Clusterhug [Blank Scripts AU]

[watchingwisteria]

im so sorry i get it now i really do, the gay angels have me shaking screaming crying at all hours of the day and night, they mean everything to me i am literally thinking about them all the time and what it would mean to love someone steadily and silently through eternity, what it would mean to love across the lines of a divine war of supposed good and evil, what it would mean to carve out a space for oneself and ones lover in no man’s land, in the grey and moral ambiguity when you were created to be black and white without blemish. god i love them so much i just

[i-dare-say]

I don't fucking care about anything else. What do you mean "'dying together' also included a 'together'"??? I cannot stop thinking about this line. It's embedded in my brain. I feel like I'm losing my mind. This novel will be the death of me!!! I want to strangle something or push myself down a cliff because what the fuck!!! This series shouldn't have this tight of a grip on my heart and yet! AND YET!!!

[goldenkenku]

BLOOD ON YOUR HANDS

- (Don't tag as ship btw)

[rrogueamendiares]

sleepless nights

[phonydiaries]

the foolish Bastard and the Bastard's Fool

[bleuczennie]

IMAGINING JISUNG FUCKING INTO YOU AND HE SAYS "Yeah?Ya like that?" THEN HE'D SPIT ON HIS FINGER AND RUB YOU FROM BEHIND. WJDJDHDHDHH

NOOOO LIKE LISTEN

honestly i actually think jisung is the type to make you wear a butt plug during sex cause twice the stimulation yk, not only is he filling you up but the plug is adding pressure too! he’d definitely toy with it during back shots just to hear those delicious moans that you always give him. oh his favorite thing is to hear you like he’ll literally keep his volume to a minimum just to hear you better is like ACK—

and while he’s going he is not showing any mercy to you like he is mesmerized with the recoil every time his hips hit your ass like he’s unconsciously going harder getting lost in the feeling. and when you’re literally trying to crawl away he pulls you back and pins your hands behind your back and uses the force of his thrusts to push you further into the mattress.

and while ur moaning helplessly and writhing against the mattress all you’re hearing behind you is “Fuck, yeah, you like that?” and “Louder baby, lemme hear you.”

AMKAJANSMEMELALKA i’m not okays—

[leodoriya]

the fact that i have spent three or four days i don’t know anymore doing nothing but binging what we do in the shadows is insane even to me because at this point im bored with the show but i have an extreme lust within me to consume fandom content but also if i get spoiled on anything i will cry so here goes to another day of binging this fucking show so i can read fanfiction and reblog fan art

[seedlessmuffins]

a study on the intimacy of being understood ♡

[m-0-ths]

Gives him a pretty little outfit as a treat 💜💜

[franken-loser]

Im SOBBING they're so cute

[rune-tisms]

more trans moral orel au doodles

[embroideredequations]

It's finally time to start introducing my Clock Tower ocs, and who better to be first than the Head of Security with her built in surveillance cameras

[goldenkenku]

THANKS TO THEM

- Click for better image quality/detail!