#they're all so different but all damn fine

[cinnasalmon]

→ Zevlor NSFW Alphabet

Various NSFW relationship headcanons, one letter at a time! Very long. Even longer than the SFW one. Sorry not sorry

SFW Alphabet here !

CAUTION: There is some dom/sub and kink talk. Nothing graphic, but JSYK.

→ A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

The doting just doesn't stop with this man. No matter how rough the sex was, how feral he was, how much of a different side of him he showed, he will revert back to his usual affectionate self.

He will make for damn sure his partner his taken care of before he even thinks of sleeping—no matter now tired he is. He cannot fully rest until his partner or lover is relaxed. Water, a bath, extra cushions, blankets, massaging oil, etc. at the ready. 

God forbid he does fall asleep before they do, the entire next day is dedicated entirely to them, 100%, even if they state several times they're fine and he's got nothing to worry about. Doesn't matter to him, in his mind he needs to make up for lack of being a good partner.

→ B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His self-esteem has seen better days, so he probably doesn't have a favorite body part of his own. I think if he had to choose, maybe abs or legs: they gotta be toned as hell, even at his age. Good job, Zevlor. You earned it. 👏

Favorite body part of his partner's though? Is “everything” an answer? Body worship extraordinaire over here. Whatever body part his partner doesn't like of their own, he'll love on it extra. They don't even need to verbally state they're self-conscious about it; he takes notes, and he knows. Next time, he'll spend plenty of time leaving slow, loving kisses on it and caressing it with a heated touch.

→ C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Oh lordy this man has a lot of cum. Hah, maybe not as much as someone like Halsin, but the longer he goes without cumming the more cum his loads will have, obviously. But even otherwise, I still think he's got a fair bit. 

His taste isn't too distinct; it's pretty run-of-the-mill. But he has quite a bit and it is thicky and sticky, so if his partner is one to swallow, get ready. And if they don't swallow, well get ready, too. He'll be cumming everywhere and if he cums on their face? They better have their eyes shut tight that's all I'm saying lmao

→ D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

I've seen a couple of people mention a possible scent kink and I can't get it out of my mind. This man cannot get enough of his partner's smell; their pheromones drive him uh, fucking bonkers. Of course he enjoys it after a fresh wash, but when they're hot and sweaty? My goodness he's got a chub just from a whiff. And when their scent changes from becoming aroused? Insert boi-oing sound effect here ‘cause that's what's happening in them trousers.

Convince him to give some training, particularly outdoors for best effect, and watch as he becomes more… hands-on as time goes on. Wouldn't be hard to get him to tussle—a little play wrestling if you will—and he'll be tempted to fuck right there in the dirt. 

→ E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

For sure knows what he's doing. He's got experience under his belt (hehe), it's just… been a while is all. 

Back in his heyday, Hellriders were the local authority and sought after as partners and lovers, so no shortage there. I'm not fixed on one set of headcanons for Zevlor's young soldier days, so whether he had a hoe phase or was committed to one partner the whole time, I do think he's had experience nonetheless. (However, I have been toying around the idea of a virgin/celibate Zevlor, but that's a whole other can of worms not particularly relevant right now)

Plus, he's a romantic, so even if he doesn't have much experience, his intuition and drive will translate well in the bedroom.

→ F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

OH LORD. Anything where he can see their face. He likes seeing just how good he makes someone feel, just from his touch (and/or words 👀). It doesn't matter if he's dom or sub or top or bottom or what-the-fuck-ever—he gets so much pleasure from seeing his partner unravel. He's cum solely from getting his lovers off before, so that's nothing new, either.

Missionary is a given, but he also enjoys lotus. If he's riled up, mating press and the like is also on the menu. If he wants to show off his high strength and his partner fits the bill, he'll stand up, hold them by their ass, and bounce them on that thang. 

→ G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

I mean, he is pretty serious for the most part—he aims to please. But sometimes sex is weird! There's funny noises and cramps that happen sometimes. He's used to it, and he'll go with the flow. He just enjoys being intimate, no matter how awkward it can be. He may chuckle here and there, but he mainly feeds off of the energy of his lover. If they get embarrassed, he'll reassure them they shouldn't be ashamed of their own body and the weird noises it makes sometimes. 

And sometimes if a particularly contorting position spontaneously falls apart and they fall on top of each other, he'll make sure they're okay first and foremost, then have a laugh at the happenstance—it was worth a try!

→ H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

This is quite influenced by my own bias/preferences as I'm borderline turned off by body hair, so please proceed with caution knowing that lmao

I personally don't see him as a hairy guy like, hardly at all. He keeps his face shaved (and has fairly dark stubble when it starts growing back) but otherwise his body hair is very fine and sparse. Mainly arms, legs, some hairs on his chest, a semblance of a happy trail, and a light bush that doesn't really grow enough to warrant much maintenance. 

Color-wise, very close to his sandy locks, perhaps a shade or two darker.

→ I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Oh. My. Lord. He is a king and expert on intimacy; as I've stated numerous times before this man craves connection above all else. He is focused entirely on his partner and their pleasure, created and caused by himself. Sure he likes the little bit of ego boost from seeing his partner through to their climax just from his touch, but what matters most is they're safe and comfortable enough to be in such a headspace with him. 

→ J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

So, this really depends. Before Elturel fell, it wasn't too terribly often, maybe a couple of times a week. 

But I think after the exile, he'll be too stressed to take care of himself. Howeverrr… if he pines after and crushes on someone, he'll realize just how pent up he is. He'll still try to be a gentleman and not frantically get himself off to the thought of their naked body rubbing against his, but eventually he'll cave and have an immediate and immense sense of relief… and feel like a total pervert.

Being in an established relationship, he doesn't really feel the need unless he or his partner is away for a few days or more for whatever reason. He misses their companionship, so his hand will have to suffice until they can be together again.

→ K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

The most obvious is breeding kink. This man has always wanted a family but never let himself have one due to the expectations and stress of being a Hellrider. But if his partner begs him to breed them, regardless if they can physically bear child or not, he's going to snap.

And like I mentioned before, scent kink. 

→ L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Not into exhibitionism; he likes the intimacy of privacy. He doesn't have to worry about prying eyes or ears. So, anywhere that is secluded, ideally at home or a room at an inn, but if the situation calls for it, “secluded” is the keyword here 😉

→ M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Ummmmmm anything his partner does (jk…ish). But for real, body worship, y'all: make him feel wanted, loved, noticed, etc. His self-image can be in the pits sometimes, so love on him plenty, dote on him often; show him he is worthy, he is enough, and let him steer the reins if he wants to take it further. 

If you want to go from 0 to 100, the base of his tail is extremely sensitive. He could be holding back with a steel resolve, but consider that the feral button. A gentle touch will become a pointy grip. A relieving sigh rolls into a hungry snarl. Godspeed.

And honest to god, I think he would probably get turned on if he saw his crush or partner do something heroic or good (without expecting anything in return). Killing some threatening hyenas or goblins, breaking up a fight… shit, even helping an old lady pick up her spilled groceries. Whatever they're doing, he's in pure awe, and will jump on those bones at the opportunity.

→ N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

(CAUTION: degradation, pain, humilation, and mindbreak)

As a dom = degradation or pain kink is going to be very dicey. He's devastated just by seeing his partner hurt, but if it’s caused by him? Girl bye. Even times when he gets a little carried away and feral and draws some blood with his scratches or bites can wrack him with guilt, no matter how much his partner reassures him they enjoyed it both in the moment and afterwards. So anything beyond that would probably be a hard no from him, but he'll be willing to hear their reasoning behind it and see if a compromise can be reached.

As a sub = my first thought is humiliation kink like, bordering mindbreak. I think he can handle some embarrassment, but humiliation where it's teetering the edge of mindbreak would be a no-no zone. Obviously from the events of Act 2, he doesn't take well to any threats to his psyche, and I'd wager that would extend to kink as well. But he's got immense mental fortitude—so he can handle some heat, if you're picking up what I'm putting down. 

→ O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

I'm a parrot when it comes to this but it's true—he is a man. of. service. And I'm not just talking in terms of a paladin.

He aims to please—especially his partner, like hello!!! Of course he loves receiving, but he wants to give more than he receives. That's his motto, baby. He gets pleasure from pleasing his partner, he could cum just from getting them off (and he has!)

And skill? Oh have no fear, he has experience, but it'll only take one, maybe two times before he knows his lover's sensitive points that sends shivers down their spine. He loves their taste, their arousal, just from his touch. He'll be an expert in his partner's body language in no time, he knows how to read them. They won't need to suggest or tell him to do anything.

→ P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Oh oh oh he loves to go slow and sensual by far ! He wants to see every single thrust he makes unto his partner reveal on their face. 

And on the contrary, he loves it to be slow and sensual when he's on the receiving end, too. He wants to feel everything. 

Don't get me wrong, the also loves it rough both ways as well, but to feel the most connection with his lover/partner, slow and sensual is the way to go. Though sometimes he just wants to go hard and fast, feral as fuck, to breed and be bred. 

→ Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

As stated before, he likes his lovemaking like one cooks a stew—low and slow. He prefers to take his time, but boy howdy it would be mighty difficult for him to decline a quickie. More than capable of achieving it, especially if he's been teased beforehand. That way, by the time the clothes come off, he's already hard, baby! 

The best quickies are when he and/or his partner have somewhere to be soon, but they neeeeed to get it out now; he looks so good; they can't stop thinking about it; etc. until they're basically blocking the front door. He may huff and puff but secretly, he likes the game 😉

→ R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Very open-minded, willing to try just about anything once. His partner's pleasure is his priority, so if they're super into something or want to experiment, he's all for it.

Not much of a risk taker nowadays, unless he knows it'll pay off (or if he thinks it's worth it). Many, many moons ago he would've been riskier, and every so often that side of him will come back out should the stars align. 

→ S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

It depends. He's still got lots of endurance in him, but the whole ‘aging’ thing is creeping up on him. He can go a few rounds, but his refractory period is a bit longer now than it was 20+ years ago. 

But, get him riled up enough, and through sheer force of lust he might even be ready again before his partner is. 

He likes to cum at least once before stickin’ it in—giving or receiving—because he will last longer that way. Not that he would cum instantly, but it has happened before (cough the first time he and his partner had sex together cough)

→ T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He may have a toy or two for penetrating himself, but largely he just gets himself off with his hand, especially after being exiled from Elturel. I don't think his toys were a priority to take with him. But hey, you never know. 

If his partner has a toy, he's willing to try it out if suggested to him, especially if the relationship is matured and could use some ‘newness’. He's very open-minded, especially if it's something his partner is already into.

→ U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He isn't naturally a tease unless he gets riled up. Then at that point, it's payback, i.e. if his partner rubs their ass up against his groin in public, then best believe he'll be taking notes and um…. ‘review’ them later in the bedroom. 

It wouldn't be impossible for him to tease, though, he likes the cat-and-mouse game and likes to switch it up sometimes. His payback for teasing him earlier would probably be when his partner is tending to household chores. Especially something like cooking, where they can't just walk away from a roux they've spent the past 15 minutes continuously stirring.

→ V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Not very loud, but he does make more noise the more turned on and (at times) feral he is. If his lover is very vocal and loud, they won't hear him very well. 

Makes a lot of grunts, growls, anything guttural and throaty, really. Including—if the other party can get him to speak it—Infernal. He'll mutter some Infernal curses every so often, but to actually speak it? He has to be in a specific headspace.

→ W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Following up from above, I like to headcanon the more Infernal he speaks, the more wild and unhinged he gets, and vice-versa. His “lizard brain” (fiendish brain?) tendencies come out and override his otherwise natural behaviors: goes hard and fast, chasing his own high, clawing, biting, tail thrashing around if it isn't already tightly coiled around a leg (or other body part 👀), etc. 

As a bonus I also have been thinking more of the headcanon that tieflings have succubus/incubus spittle (only when very aroused) and uh… yeah. Talk about a whole new layer of arousal and connection for our Hellrider. Hoo lordy /fans self

→ X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He's in fantastic shape. Being a military commander is one thing, but in a cavalry? Where one has to wield a weapon, shield, and/or flag while on horseback? Lord have mercy. He won't be ripped to shreds or jacked as hell, but his muscles are firm and well-toned. 

In addition, lots of scars. Even if much of the city guard stayed within city limits where crime was low and they didn't have to do much of anything, Zevlor always preferred to be out in Elturgard and fighting threats head-on. Because of this, he's got his fair share of past battles decorating his skin. 

→ Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

So there's a whole lot of layers to that onion of a headcanon I don't want to get into here, but once he knows he has a partner or lover he can go to for sex, best believe he'll be taking them up on that. Pre- or post-exile, he'll have plenty of stress to let out. Sparring and training can only alleviate so much. 

But once he's in an established relationship, it's much more of a sharing-of-pleasure-and-uniting-as-one kind of thing. It means a lot to him to copulate with his partner. He strives for connection in all ways, and sex is certainly no exception.

→ Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

I am so sorry you have to hear it from me but at his age? He's falling asleep immediately. Once he's had his fill (hehe), it's lights out quicker than you can say “That was amazing.” But! The more he's turned on, he'll go for more rounds obviously. Though once he's at his limit? Good night, see you in the morning. 

———

If you made it this far congrats! Also I encourage you to fill out this alphabet too, for Zevlor or whoever!

[c00kieguy]

Professor Aventurine ✧

relationships: Dr. Ratio & Aventurine (can be interpreted as platonic or romantic) summary: Ratio needs to do a prerequisite course and turns out Aventurine is the lecturer cw: Just humor ig? But treated seriously, based on this post by @jailgarden a/n: Ok, listen. Idk wtf he’d need a Behavioral Science cert for and i’m too lazy to search for something else so just…take it pls. Not proofread so if there are any mistakes pls lmk! wc: ~1k masterlist

The intelligentsia guild doesn't let just anyone in. Sure they have a lot more leeway compared to the Genius Society, but to have joined the guild one would need to possess many talents and have the drive and hunger to seek knowledge. Dr. Ratio fits all of these perfectly.

And yet here he was, signing himself up for a rudimentary Behavioral Science course.

If someone had told him he'd be attending such a class a month ago he would've laughed in your face. Him? The Dr. Ratio? In a simple college level course? Anyone would laugh. 

But while the guild valued the acquisition of knowledge, they also valued retaining it. It had been quite some time since Ratio had learned about this topic, and seeing as it had nothing to do with his line of work he didn't feel the need to focus on it either. However, there was an upcoming project that he had been requested to aid in, and it required anyone who has no recent background in behavioral science to complete a prerequisite course, including him. Initially he was opposed to the idea, but seeing as the new project would be a great opportunity to broaden his horizons, he didn't want to miss it.

He didn’t need to attend the class. All the course material had already been shared with the students and he was confident he could pass with flying colors just from self studies alone, but attendance was 10% of the grade and he’ll be damned if he got anything less than full marks so off to class he went.

Taking a seat right in the middle of the lecture hall to ensure a good view of the screen, he gets ready for the class. Having arrived fifteen minutes early he had plenty of time to prepare. Truly a model student. Unfortunately the professor seems to be the exact opposite as they're nowhere to be seen. Ratio just sighs and takes a sip from his bottle, did they have no sense of punctuality? How unprofessional.

"Good afternoon, my name is Aventurine-” He nearly spits out his water. Who?

“I’ll be your lecturer for this course. Your tutorial classes will be handled by a different professor, but if you have any questions you may reach out to my secretary. I will reply within three working days so please, one mail is fine.” A steady string of ‘no’ echos in his head. There was no way. What in the world was he doing here? Why him? This had to be a hallucination.

“Since this is your first lecture I’ll just briefly explain the course overview and the expectations for this subject-” Their eyes meet while Aventurine scans his class. Of all the people he expected to find among his students, the doctor was the last he thought of, but here he was. His eyes didn't linger however, he didn’t want the rest of the class to think he knew Ratio since it may lead to accusations of favoritism, but with how well known they were it was no shock that most of the class already knew the moment he stepped foot into the lecture hall.

“- if we have time I’ll start with…topic 1…” He finishes in uncertainty. Needless to say the lecture was not productive in the slightest. Most people were either constantly shifting their gaze from Aventurine to Ratio and going back and forth or in Ratio’s desk mates' case, attempting to focus over the sound of his gritting teeth.

—————

“Ratio!!” The blond man comes jogging down the hallway towards him, a cup of hot coffee in his hand. Was it really necessary to shout his name? As if the embarrassment of being a student to this man wasn’t enough, now he had to be seen interacting with him too. Aventurine doesn’t seem to notice his sour mood and plops himself on a chair next to him and places the drink in front of the scholar “For you~”. Propping his head up on his hands he gives Ratio a mischievous look.

“Didn’t think I’d stumble upon you in class. I never thought you of all people would be my student heh, guess you have to call me professor now.” Ratio gives him the best ‘leave-me-alone’ look he can muster up but all he ends up doing is looking even more miserable. Three weeks of this…three whole weeks.

“Why…why are you teaching this class?” He asks in a defeated tone. Out of everyone it just had to be him. It’s not that Ratio hated him, of course not, but he’d always pride himself in being the smarter of the two, and now…his ego has definitely taken a huge hit.

“Just a little favor for a friend that’s all, they’re the one teaching the tutorial class by the way.” Ah, another one of those ‘favors’ he hands out to ‘friends’. That made more sense. Aventurine was someone who fit more into a party-goer lifestyle, so seeing him in his vibrant outfit within campus walls was certainly something. It was obvious he wasn't here out of his own volition.

“I could turn a blind eye to your attendance, you know? For a price.” Aventurine says with a wink. Of course he knew the doctor would never agree to it, if not for academic integrity, at least for the fact that everyone in the class already knows he attends it and his reputation would be in shambles. He still loved teasing him, something about seeing a haughty guy like Ratio look at him with barely any soul left in him gave him a satisfied feeling.

Not even batting an eye, Ratio grabs the cup of steaming coffee in front of him and downs it in one go. The hot beverage stings his throat but honestly anything was better than having this conversation. He all but slams the empty cup on the table before abruptly standing up.

“I’ll see you next class…professor.” And with that he leaves. Aventurine wears a coy smile seeing him go. These three weeks were sure to be entertaining~

masterlist a/n: btw, you're the tutorial teacher. if that matters lol

© c00kieguy ➼ do not repost/copy/translate (without my permission) or claim any of my works as your own. Reblogs are appreciated ❣

[moldingeggplant]

pairing: zoro x sanji / zosan (one piece)

genre: fluff, idiocy, getting together, mutual pining

warnings: none, just headache inducing dumbassery from the two of them

ao3

sanji never liked books. he thinks they're too unrealistic to entertain him. the only ones he can stand are those with recipes.

that was until robin introduced him to a "stupid" romance novel, one that he liked quite a lot.

since then, he's become a bookworm and bonds more with robin over their shared interests. he has also been comparing a certain marimo to the books he enjoys.

about how unpredictable the novels that robin recommended to him are, just like the seaweed. how he enjoys watching zoro's day-to-day routine, just like how the books entertain him. how he thinks he knows where the story is going but then it takes a huge turn- just like zoro, who surprises him with every move he does.

a plot twist, an enigma, that's what zoro is. zoro is like a book to sanji, maybe that's what got him hooked to books in the first place- which he never liked from the start, zoro, yes that's it. he likes books like how he likes zoro.

but of course, the marimo doesn't need to know that.

just like in books, he's gonna be watching from afar, silently watching zoro until he gets his own lover and reaches a happy ending. then that's where his cue to stop is going to come.

books are entertaining and this should be as well, right? he's gonna stay as an outsider from zoro's romance story, like how he reads books. he's gonna root for zoro, the main lead, and his love interest, he would want them to get together, for his own enjoyment as well.

so why the hell does it hurt?

guess that's the difference between books and reality.

the other gives you little pangs of pain whenever the main couple have misunderstandings, the other.. well, makes you suffer in silence. much worse that being kicked by blackleg sanji himself, the very own sanji bets.

'whatever', the blonde brushes it off. these stupid feelings will go away soon anyway. he's too busy to fall inlove, it won't do him any good in finding the All Blue. 'it's just a little crush because zoro is so cool and hot- nothing serious.'

is what he'd like to say if this "stupid little crush" hasn't been here for the past 6 months already.

okay- so he might be slightly inlove with the marimo BUT it's sure to go away soon. he swears.

while he was having an internal conflict about his dumbass feelings, zoro casted him a look, and gave a gut-wrenching (positive) smile that made him want to rip out his beating heart in an instant.

it's times like these that sanji falls harder for the goddamn marimo. a smile so so small while he's working out and the blonde relaxing a few inches away, a pat on the head after zoro finishes his dinner as a praise for sanji's (usual) great food, zoro hearing him out when a sudden depressive episode hits him while they're on night watch, god fucking damn it.

he IS head over heels for zoro, fine. fuck you if you somehow get the balls to mention all of this information to the dumbass.

he has no clue about sanji's feelings, and it shall stay that way because he's not kidding when he says he's gonna throw himself out of the ship, in the middle of this huge ass sea, if god forbid his feelings reached the ears of the seaweed.

zoro suddenly stopped lifting his weights and looked at sanji for a second and said, "hey cook, the dessert earlier was amazing. you remembered that i don't like sweets, thanks."

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK.

A RARE COMPLIMENT FROM ZORO HE'S GOING TO ACTUALLY DIE.

"ah.. it's nothing. what kind if cook am i if i don't please my customers, yeah?" sanji managed to reply normally despite malfunctioning like crazy on the inside.

he fucking hates this side of zoro.

the rare, soft, gentle, zoro who you might mistake for the man of your dreams if it weren't for the fact that this side of him is the complete opposite of the real zoro who is a brute, stupid, no-table-manners, swordsman.

the soft zoro who always manages to catch sanji off-guard and makes him wanna throw himself to outer space and never come back because of how much his heart was beating for the marimo.

he is exaggerating but he can't help it he's head over heels for the swordsman- not that he actually wants to admit to it.

despite sanji's brain going into ruins he failed to miss the smile that zoro- again- gave him.

this is the worst.

he only wanted to relax in this fine afternoon after the exhaustion of which feeding the bottomless pit that is luffy's stomach gave him, not fall inlove harder with this crewmate!

it doesn't help that their other friends are out enjoying themselves and left only the two of them to guard the ship.

yes, that's right, guard the ship AND NOT UNDRESS THE MARIMO WITH HIS EYES.

this is the worst, oh god- this is the first time he turned to the guy above whom everyone worships and it is shameless to ask but- sanji wishes for a sea king to just appear and swallow him, never to be found, never to come back aboard on the ship with the man he loves.

well apparently god hates non-worshippers because the marimo just had to talk to him again- now with a slight blush on his face.

huh? a blush? what? why-

"cook, are you dating someone?" zoro asked with a voice so quiet it makes it seem like he didn't want to speak in the first place.

sanji, confused, and quite frankly tired of running around in his own mind just because his crush did something cute, replied with a raised voice, "HUH?" which seem to have startled zoro a bit, he's used with the cook yelling all the damn time but he didn't really expect that the blonde would take offense from the question.

zoro slightly panicking, took his question back "shit. should i have not asked? sorry cook, i was curious and robin told me to ju-" but he was cut off when sanji gave a reply.

"no no no just wait you goddamn marimo- i'm not dating someone. and what do you mean you were curious?!" sanji replied with a blush that you can never miss, even if you were the dumbest seaweed on earth.

zoro returned the blush, equally flustered as the other because his motive was just exposed to the chef, "yeah- uh- i was curious, it's like i know everything about you but not if you have a lover or something.. i asked robin and she told me to just ask you directly and i did. is that weird?"

shit. zoro's actions makes it seem like he likes him back.

wait.

like.. him.. back?

"w-why were you curious in the first place anyway? i'm pretty sure you don't have a single romantic bone in you... the question isn't weird but now it is because it came from you!" sanji asked- more like demanded to know to be honest- the blush still not going away from his face.

zoro gave him a dumbfounded look, like sanji was THE dumb one, "why would you ask that? i thought you knew...?" he said with genuine confusion.

before sanji could ask- yell 'what the hell does that mean marimo?!' zoro spoke again, the most unbelievable sentence so far.

"i like you, cook."

for the love of everything holy.

sanji bursted out laughing, though not genuine, "no- haha, i must be dreaming! i read too many romance novels and now i'm projecting on my dreams that the stupid marimo actually likes me back! yeah that's it- that's what's happening here. this isn't real." he nervously laughed it off, after all it's impossible that the roronoa zoro has romantic feelings for someone, let anyone sanji himself.

the chef was proven wrong when zoro's reaction turned into one of concern, "the hell do you mean cook? this is real life. i'm being genuine here and you just laughed it off, just say so if you feel the same way, i can actually take rejections you know." after he uttered the last bit, zoro's expression turned into just genuine sadness, definitely a reaction you wouldn't expect from the man himself.

"no, god no, it's not like that you dumbass marimo! didn't you hear what i just said? i said i like you but i never expected for you to return the feelings- hell, i didn't even expect you to know your own feelings! it just feels like a dream, you know? i've been fighting my feelings for 6 months already and i swore to never let you know but here you are, confessing. i even compared you to the romance novels that robin gave me- said i would've been okay with just watching you from afar getting all happy and soft with your lover even if i knew it was a lie but then you went ahead and said all this. of course i wouldn't believe it!" sanji was practically rambling but he didn't really care, as long as the message gets through zoro's thick skull.

"what? 6 months? i never noticed!"

sanji lit up a cigarette to hide his embarrassment, "told ya' you're stupid." then he blew out a smoke.

zoro frowned at his response, "i could say the same thing to you shit cook. i've been flirting with you for 9 months already and you never noticed."

the chef choked on his own smoke, "what the hell?! how long have you liked me!?" sanji yelled while coughing slightly and zoro replied with the same volume, "since arlong park you dumbass!"

"then why the fuck did you not tell me!?"

"you're always flirting with women, who would?"

sanji looked over at zoro who he didn't notice scooted near him and stopped working out completely, and if he wasn't observant enough he would've missed the pout-y expression that zoro was making, though he was amazing at hiding it.

"yeah, my bad. we're just both idiots huh?" the cook extinguished his cigarette and grinned, zoro shortly returned the face, "yeah. you're worse though. dense as hell love cook."

"even the most intelligent person wouldn't know if you're flirting you idiot! you're always glaring at me and picking a fight, how the hell would i catch the hint? it's not like i can rea-"

"shut up and kiss me, shit cook."

they spent the whole afternoon making out (gross) and cuddling, when the crew came back they sneakily went back to doing their own thing as if nothing romantic happened in the first place.

the crew could tell though. the first fight that broke out between them after the others arrived back from their little trip was practically filled with hearts and flowers all over the both of them.

oh and a certain someone was definitely spying on them, congratulating sanji for making the scenes in his favorite romance novels come to life, albeit not as romantic.

though it is quite obvious that the cook wouldn't have his own romance any other way.

[hopeful-hufflepuff-peeves]

I think I've discovered my sexuality... the Atlas six

[liquidstar]

I have abs not from working out but from coughing so much all the time for like a decade that I might as well have been doing crunches

[timey-fandom-stuff]

Kris fears (almost) nothing and Skylar fears (almost) everything so it kinda balances out. but unfortunately they still make a terrible team and absolutely everyone hates it, especially them. being a Player was SO much easier when they were just pushing keys on a keyboard.

(why are they in a battle in the light world? dw about it)

[gender-euphowrya]

it really fucks me up how fiction isn't allowed to just end anymore like. creators will tell a full story that has a clear definite ending and instead of being like ''wow great story !'' it's all ''make a sequel ! a prequel ! an epilogue ! a spin-off ! dlc !"

like maybe move on

[eterniityblooms]

updated my rules to include shipping info + a bit more about my monster muses specifically, since shipping with at LEAST one muse on this account is probably inevitable at some point

[thehardkandy]

i have been lurking around online help forums answering questions for probably at least 15 years and to this day it still drives me absolutely bananas when people essentially just post "HELP! I HAVE A PROBLEM" and then refuse to provide any information or context as if you are some sort of mind-reading savant capable of inducing all the information required on the broadest problem imaginable

[loregoddess]

so I've been watching the KH Union Cross stuff (in order, thank goodness, this would be so confusing to piece together otherwise), and like, I knew enough about UX that the appearance of the foretellers at the end of KH3 wasn't confusing bc I knew who they all were, but getting the expanded, explained lore and I'm like okay, actually these weirdos in animal masks are pretty cool, glad to know they'll show up (presumably) in future games

also I'm glad that memorizing the Latin names for the seven deadly sins is finally paying off

[bylertruther]

mike would bite y'all for comparing him to steve 💔 he will NEVER be michael wheeler ✋

[kindacreepy-kindaugly]

If I absolutely have to feel like shit could it at least be cause I let it happen again instead of cause I feel like I didn't do good enough

[buckyalpine]

Imagine the fluff of Bucky retiring from the avengers because he met you, the sweetest thing on the planet, the woman he's down on one knee for ready to marry in a heart beat. He's built a house from the ground up, a quite place for your little growing family because not long after the wedding, he has a baby boy on the way. It’s all perfect.

The absolute angst of him losing you when complications arise during the delivery and the doctors and nurses chase him out, not giving him a chance to hold you and comfort you. The last thing he sees is your labored breaths and dropping pulse.

He hears the cries of his son moments later but his happiness is short lived when the med bay is forced into an emergency evacuation because of an attack on the compound. He sees a blur of doctors rushing you to a different wing and in the midst of the chaos, his new born baby is placed into his arms. He pleads to be able to go with you but he's dragged out with no answers with the building crumbling and bursting into fire and flames behind him moments later.

He's inconsolable.

Completely distraught.

The memorial service held for you leaves Bucky in shambles, clinging onto the tiny bundle wrapped up in his arms, the only thing he has left to live for now. He doesn't want to go on without you, it's just him and his little boy in the world. He know he has to be strong for his son so he carries on as best as he can. His heart hurts when his baby boy asks for his mama.

He visits your grave often but he never truly feels peace.

There was never even a body for him to bury.

Bucky comes out of retirement when Tony calls him about a mission. He knows its serious because they wouldn't ask him to come for just anything. He doesn't want to fight again but he does it for his son; the world has to be safe for his baby.

"Daddy will be just fine" Bucky reassures his now 5 year old, pressing a kiss to his head, leaving him to stay with Sarah while he's away. When he's back at the compound, he's given a briefing on what they're up against. They leave the next morning.

-

"I've got them in the west wing, headed towards you Steve" Bucky may have been out of the field for a couple of years but his skills and training still run in his blood. He trails behind the target, gun in hand, catching a knife that's thrown his way before dodging another. He gets them cornered in an abandoned ware house, ready to end it all, justice be damned, he just wanted to get back home to his baby boy. He's about to pull the trigger but that's when he sees it.

The red skull with tentacles surrounding it.

He freezes.

He blocks a punch that comes his way, grabbing their wrist and holding them in place, shoving them against the wall. All he can see are their eyes.

Bucky knows those eyes.

No.

He rips the mask off and nearly sobs, his hands trembling as he continues to hold them with all his strength knowing it was hurting them but what choice did he have.

"Doll?"

Just a thought, okay love you, bye.

[cryptotheism]

How many languages do you speak?

You are always talking about alchemist that lived all around the world in very differente time periods. And you have mentioned several times that there's a ton of numerology hidden in their texts, counting syllables and letters of certain words and paragraphs. So one would assume you need to read them in the original language it was written, right?

That's a really good question! As with most really good questions, the answer is "kinda, it depends!"

So! Most alchemical texts are written in some form of coded language, but the nature of that code depends on the era and culture the text is being written in. Depending on how its written, modern scholars have a lot of different tools for cracking open alchemical esoterica.

Most ancient Greek/Byzantine texts are written in postclassical Greek. But, they're often written in dense philosophical prose. The reader needs to be familiar with the likes of Plato, Aristotle, and the early Neoplatonists, to make sense of them. Luckily for us, people have been studying postclassical Greek for nearly 2000 years. There are many excellent translations into English.

Late Egyptian alchemists wrote almost entirely in pictograph code. Not as in hieroglyphics, mind you. Egyptian alchemical recipes often made use of custom character sets and symbols that represented alchemical concepts. (One famous example, the Formula of the Crab, uses a complex diagram that looks like a centipede to represent a particular gold compound.) These are damn near impossible to read without expert help.

At the same time, Jewish and Syriac writers of the era could get by on the fact that not everyone could read Hebrew and Syriac lol. The language barrier itself acted as a sort of copyright system for protecting their ideas. Luckily for us, many of these texts were preserved and translated by medieval Arab scholars!

Speaking of Arabic, once you hit the Islamic Golden Age, the amount of alchemical literature increases by a factor of ten. Thing is, the Islamic Polymaths weren't all that interested in obscuring their work. The Islamic Golden Age was all about copying and translating older works, and compiling them into big textbook/dictionaries. They're not intentionally encoded, they're comparatively easy to read once you get a good translation. Thing is, you gotta know your Neoplatonism. Medieval Islamicate scholars love Neoplatonism.

Then we get the reintroduction of alchemy to Europe around the 10th century. What you get is about 400 years of monks painstakingly translating medieval Arabic into Latin. A lot of these texts are very well preserved, and have good translations into English.

Then, around the late 14th century, European entrepreneurial alchemy kicks into high gear, and THIS is where we get all those fancy numerology encoded alchemical texts. Renaissance alchemists loved themselves some puzzles. This would be fine if they were all just writing in Latin, but the printing press meant they could write in any damn language they please. You get a lot of French, German, Dutch, Italian, and antiquated English alchemical texts, and they can be a bitch to read without help.

BUT the introduction of the printing press also gave us something useful: cheap picture books! Late renaissance alchemists loved writing in word games and coded metaphor, but they also loved including esoteric diagrams. And the thing about esoteric diagrams is --if you know your stuff-- you don't need to speak 15th century french to read a picture. Which isn't a replacement for reading the original translation, not even close, but the explicit purpose of these images was to prove to other alchemists that the author knows what they're talking about. So if you can read them, you can get a damn good sense as to what the text is about.

This was fun to write so I'm gonna plug my patreon if you wanna see me write more about alchemy.

[all-purpose-dish-soap]

lowkey I kinda wanna top gaz or ghost out of curiosity on how they would react 🤔

gaz or ghost? gaz AND ghost. ranked competitive sex. the ol' good cock/bad cock.

they're both confident almost cocky but they show it very differently.

you tell gaz you wanna be on top this time.

"i'm fine with that," he says.

cool cool cool. easy. too easy, in fact.

he's smiling at you. "you want to be on top, you're on top." he says. "easy as."

so... you get to be the dominant one this time. he knows that's what you mean. right?

mm, harder sell. you wanna do his job? you're gonna need to prove you have what it takes. you're gonna have to work for it. talk like you mean it. don't whine, don't ask, don't just tell him what to do. command him. 

and don't mess up.

nsfw ⬇

order him to take his clothes off. top him like you mean it--bounce on him like you don't need any help, because he's not helping you. and control yourself. edge him. don't show weakness. make him keep his eyes on you. keep his interest with your body, your voice, your tone.

(it's tough for him, feigning such precarious half-interest. pretending like you don't have a visegrip on his every atom. pretending like he's not suddenly understanding how it might feel to be possessed by a succubus. it's tough, but he's soldiering through because he's a great fucking teacher. this is good for you, you just don't know it yet.)

he's teaching you to use your whole body to tell him you're in charge. you need to make the rules.

if you don't--if you slip up--he'll make you sorry. he'll give you a crash course in how a mean dom operates.

(you might be able to collar him, but god help you if you fumble. the second you do, that o-ring choker is going on your neck, and his thumb is already hooked in.)

ghost--

ghost is a little easier to entice. he's a visual guy. he's a little smitten with anyone who approaches him first. you're offering to top him? to put your whole damn body on display? that's an act of service, baby.

even if you're doing it because you want to control the pace and the position, even if you want to take your own pleasure and act like you don't give a damn about his... you're still giving him exactly what he wants. if all he needs to do is lay back and shut up, he'll play your game.

not a tough job, either. not half bad. he could get used to this. nope, he's already used to it. he's thinking ahead--wondering what other dirty fantasies in that pretty head he could help fulfill.

then he shifts his hips down an inch to hit your sweet spot. you snap at him not to move. 

his eyes flick up--from your hole squeezing his cock--to your face. strange sense of whiplash you're giving him--the instant flip from almost ignoring him to focusing squarely on him. negative attention or not, it's arousing. you shouldn't have done that.

"yeah?" he replies, voice low and rough. "you gonna make me?"

you don't have time to reply before he's shoving his hips up into you hard. one stroke, then two, then more, so slow and hard and deep your vision threatens to go white. 

he's challenging you to keep ignoring him now. 

"say it again," he growls. "tell me what to do one more time."

he reaches for your clit, and you fight him, grabbing his wrist, using it as leverage to sink down on him again, redoubling your pace. 

you're both fighting to stay in control. ghost could overpower you easily but he's having fun. and you're putting on a hell of a show for him.

he'll contend with your attitude later. for now he just wants to keep you pissed off and horny enough to keep riding him like you've got something to prove.

riding ghost and gaz together...

you just know they're both talking at you, trying to get your attention as you fight like hell not to fall apart.

gaz is instructing you to sit up straighter, to clench your thighs so they don't shake, to control your voice--or keep it up, sweetheart. keep moaning like a slut if you want to be treated like one. 

ghost is egging you on, enjoying how furious you're getting, how it makes you clench up and stutter when gaz says something that really gets to you. he tosses in his lot every so often to keep things going. like throwing a lit match into a pit of black powder and lead azide.

you're doomed. until.

you tell ghost to move his hands already so gaz can maneuver you by the hips instead. 

that turns them against one another in negative two seconds.

suddenly they're critiquing each other. gaz smugly insinuates you're enjoying his technique more. ghost replies smoothly that it hardly matters to him; it's his attention you're after.

their back-and-forth gives you the precious time you need to clear your head. once you can finally fucking concentrate, you can push past all this edging you've been put through by stupid competition they've been having on you.

they keep one-upping each other and only half-notice what you're up to--until you throw your head back and make a sound of pure rapture, riding them both to completion. you throw yourself into the best orgasm of your recent life.

they're dead silent as you come down, grinding your hips in bliss as the final sparks of pleasure fizzle under your skin.

it sort of humbles them. but then again, it also inflates both their egos just enough to keep them from learning their goddamn lesson.

...

more Gaz / more Ghost / more multi-141 and poly 141 / masterlist tag

[cordeliawhohung]

You created a monster in me with underboss!Simon and now you must take responsibility.

Please feed my new addiction with relationship headcanons 😩😩😩. I love him and Shy!reader.

i've created so many monsters y'all gotta stop biting at my ankles or at least start paying rent or smth <3 also i'm still trying to work out a lot of the dynamics of the relationship between them so this is still a little bare boned but i hope you enjoy!

mafia!141 masterlist <3

warnings: mostly fluff :3 simon is a bit of a prick lol, fem!reader,

just in case anyone missed it, this is how underboss!Simon and shy!Reader meet <3

it takes a brutally long time for the two of you to start dating. a brutally long time.

and it isn't for lack of trying on Simon's end. he manages to get your number somehow (i hear Soap is very tech savvy...) and asks you out the week after the dinner at John's house, only for you to decline.

which is fine. he can take rejection. but this is... different. you're too kind when you say no. you're not saying it because you think you're too good for him, you're saying it because of something else, and Simon can tell the difference but can't exactly tell what it is.

it drives him nuts for a long time. you were supposed to be just another number in his phone for a booty call. he's used to getting pretty much anything he wants, after all, but even then it shouldn't have bugged him as much as it did. maybe it was because he liked the way you looked at him. not with disgust. not with some lustful intention. you were... soft. kind, even.

as for you? you think it's crazy how this 6'4", ripped, and kind guy showed interest in you. you, someone too anxious for her own good, someone who said no because it was less scary than committing to something. and you hate yourself for rejecting him.

so in an effort to stay close to him, you text him pretty often. you send him pictures of things you see or run into during your day. something funny at work, a cool rock you found in someone's garden, the spider that decided to make its home in your shower. and sweetheart, you have no idea what you're doing to the poor man ):

this goes on for a long while. just simon being a stupid man, not wanting to push your boundaries after you already rejected him, and you being too anxious to fix things and ask him yourself.

eventually, by some miracle (that i might write more about later because like i said BARE BONES) the two of you get together. and it's... interesting. simon isn't really used to dating. like properly. he's used to buttering a girl up, going back to her place for a quick fuck, and then only seeing her whenever either of them are too bored and horny to function. but with you it's nothing like that at all. there's no sex on the first date, not even a damn kiss, and he finds himself craving you more than ever because of it. wanting to be around you all the time, wanting to hear about your day.

man is fucking obsessed.

he treats you like a princess. he only ever really spent his money on stupid shit but now he can spend it on you! you never ask for anything, but god forbid if you express that anything, be it clothes or otherwise, looks cute because he will buy it for you, no matter how awkward you are at receiving gifts.

also! because he's so big and somewhat brutish, no one fucks with you when you're in public together. annoying kiosk clerks trying to aggressively sell you something? one look from him and they're gone. someone messed up your order but you're too anxious to ask them to fix it? he's advocating for you.

because of him, you find yourself growing less afraid and anxious of things. he teaches you how to be brave, and you teach him how to be soft. there's nothing in the world that he wouldn't do for you <3

oh also btw he's in the mafia. he might have forgotten to mention that... hope that doesn't freak you out or anything. don't worry about the blood on his shirt or the bruises on his face or the cuts on his arms or... oh god you look like you're going to cry. it's nothing, sweetheart! promise! stop trying to take him to the hospital!

also, some sorta unrelated comments: i think shy!reader is def a hostess at a restaurant. i feel like simon would hang out at the restaurant too just to be around you. he'd also slip you a tip, even though you tell him you make hourly and don't depend on tips.

"consider it my way of saying thanks for sitting us at the table with the best view."

the view is you, btw.

AHHH i'm sorry this was such a mess? i have so many jumbled thoughts but i'm glad i was able to get some of them out and i hope they were somewhat enjoyable al;kdjf i'll be working on a short drabble/oneshot for him over the weekend, so i'm hoping that'll make up for this <3