#theywhowriteandknowthings fluff

[theywhowriteandknowthings]

Grocery shopping with Simon “Ghost” Riley.

My blog is predominantly 18+ minors DNI

No warnings but there are mentions of food and alcohol. 440~ Words

Simon is the king of loyalty cards.

He has a Nectar card. He religiously swipes his Tesco Club card. He has a Morrisons Fuel card for Christ’s sake.

He claims it’s because it saves money, even though he frequently grumbles that “it’s a con to make you shop there more”.

So when you’re out grocery shopping he’s always looking for good deals and will use up every point, coupon, and special offer whenever he can.

Before you he wouldn’t dare put something in the trolley if it wasn’t on offer, switching deodorant brands frequently, eating the same soup for weeks because he had to buy ten cans to get the best price.

Now, however, he has loosened his rules. Relaxed his near-obsessive frugal habits, because he wants you to have the best.

If that bottle of wine/brand of crisps/favourite ice cream you like is on offer? Well that just sweetens the deal. Literally.

You call him out on it one day when you’re in the frozen aisle, trying to decide between a branded frozen treat or Asda’s (cheaper) own brand.

“Get the more expensive one,” he coaxes you as he notices your decision paralysis as you hover in front of the glass door.

He snakes his thick, muscular arms around your middle and pulls you back against him as he places a kiss to the side of your temple. You lean back and squeeze his forearms with both hands as you look up at him.

“Don’t think it’s a waste of money?”

“Nah, besides, we earn enough to not worry about,” he pauses to peer at the prices, “A fifty pence difference.”

“Who are you and what have you done with Simon Riley?” You ask with a chuckle as he smiles against your skin, a soft hum rippling through his chest.

“Shut up and just get the ice cream,” he growls but there’s no menace in it.

You both know how much he’s changed, how much he’s grown since he met you. It warms your heart to know that you’ve impacted his life so positively.

Heavens know he’s done the same and more for you.

You finish up the shop and are getting ready to pay when the woman at the till beams at you.

“Ah the sign must have fallen off, this is actually half-price!”

She wiggles the tub of ice cream in the air and you can’t help but grin at the way Simon exhales in a silent laugh. Nostrils flaring as he tries to stifle the triumphant grin on his face.

CoD Masterlist Grocery Shopping with Gaz Grocery Shopping with Soap Grocery Shopping with Price Grocery Shopping with König

[chaotic-iguana]

dewdrop

in which miguel really, really likes mornings. or maybe not.

warnings: smut-ish? fluff? more of a braindump to get me back into writing. oh also yeah, add miguel to my character list.

morning: the suspension of time between night and day; reality warped and fuzzy and warm in the in-between; soft and slow and dripping like honey. 

the steady weight of an arm resting  on your back, a chest rising and falling under your head. the drag of the hours to come forgotten somewhere under muffled whines and fluttering lashes; greedy, grasping fingers and hungry mouths, burning kisses and whispers getting lost in the frigid air resting her fingers on your lips.

mornings are sacred. mornings are untouched; untainted by anything that was and anything that could be. golden tendrils wrapped around sighs breathed into skin, soft caresses and tangled hair met with gentle grins and gentler hands. 

mornings when even the birds are asleep; flowers slumbering under dew, when your stirring prompts a raspy ‘sleep well?’, as you blink against the blinding light kissing your lashes. when small talk becomes a symphony of moans swallowed by the seal of your mouth on his, when miguel can really take his time taking you apart and putting you back together; lay back as you straddle him and leave burning trails of kisses down his chest, watch your eyes shut and your head tip back as your toes curl, fingers fisting the bedsheet beside him and you’re divine- 

until the steady beeping of his watch signals the end of your stolen time, lyla popping up with a smirk and half-assing her way through a snarky comment while telling him about how ‘there’s another emergency and they need you now’ and day catches up with him again, sinking its claws into the delicate balance of dawn and dragging him with it. until all he can do is kiss your head and work you through it, leaving you under a heap of blankets and whispered praise before ripping off his sweatpants and activate his suit, fists curled in irritation and opening a portal, the breath knocked out of him when he turns for one last glimpse of you splayed out on his bed. until all he can do is handle it until morning comes around again. 

short, i know (sorry). update - i might be coming back?? as always, thanks for reading, comment your thoughts or find me on ao3. stay hydrated and have a great day! taglist: @imherefordeanandbones @theywhowriteandknowthings,@josephquinnswhore,@millerscoffee, @nostalxgic, @sscorpiiio, @its-nebuleuse, @sofiparallel, @mandoisapunk, @bastardmandennis (hey pal), @amanitacowboy, @party-hearses, @planet-marz1, @chiogarza, @jenispunk. i know y’all didn’t sign up for miggy content so let me know if u wanna be tagged only in pedro works. divider by the amazing @cafekitsune.

[wannab-urs]

The Peg That Middle Aged Man Campaign 2024 | Masterlist

Hello and welcome to the PMAMC 2024, a Pedro Pascal Character Fanfiction Event!!!!

Thank you so much to everyone who participated and to everyone who interacted with these amazing fics. I had an absolute blast running this little event!

NOTE: Warnings are provided, please read them. Some of these are pure fluff, some are angsty, and some have potentially triggering elements. All fics are tagged appropriately and you are responsible for your own content consumption. MDNI | 18+

AO3 Link | PMAMC 2023 | #PMAMC 2024

Comandante Veracruz

The Bet by @flightlessangelwings Warnings: smut (18+ ONLY!), pegging, anal, switching, oral (f receiving), overstim, slight roughness, established relationship and safe words, praise, no use of y/n Word count: 2.7k

Dave York

Use Me by @theywhowriteandknowthings Warnings: Reader is a blank slate, no race, age, or other descriptive factors (reader can hold Dave up on the bed). Mentions of M!Masturbation; F!Masturbation; pet names (good girl, Sweetheart); Sub/Dom dynamics; Soft!Dom Dave; face riding; Swiping that nose like an Amex; a little bit of Switch action; derogation (Dave calls reader a slut, reader likes it); degradation kink; praise kink(if you squint?); use of "Sir" for Dave; anal play; use of butt plugs; lots of lube (it's necessary folks!); harness play; strap-on use; pegging; anal penetration with a dildo; food consumption (snacks); food mention (takeout food); aftercare; bathing; they're sappy married idiots in love. Word Count: 5.8k

Dieter Bravo

I'll Try Anything Once by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin Warnings: Oral sex M and F receiving, vaginal fingering, anal fingering, unprotected PIV sex, pegging, cumplay, cum swapping, cum swallowing Word Count: 2.5k

Din Djarin

Beautiful Release by @prolix-yuy Warnings: Explicit, 18+ MINORS DNI, IT'S PEGGING DIN TIME! Anal sex (m receiving), rough sex, sex toys, fingering (m receiving), handjob, frottage, blowjob, swallowing, cumshot, mentions of oral sex (f receiving), mild dubcon (Reader isn't aware of Din's mental state and stops the session to re-negotiate boundaries), painful sex, sex as self-flagellation, hurt/comfort. Word Count: 4.1k

Ezra

Aquamarine by @for-a-longlongtime Warnings: Established relationship (f/m) plus third (hello, younger!BennyMiller from Triple Frontier!AU), dirty talk, brief masturbation (f and m), fingering (f and m receiving), rimming, anal sex, oral on a strap on, pegging, dildo is referred to as "your cock/dick" repeatedly. Some spit use (no kink).

Frankie Morales

On One Knee, On Two Knees by @beskarandblasters Warnings: f!reader, y’all get engaged, anal fingering, handjob, pegging, vaginal sex, unprotected sex, creampie, pet names, Frankie is a Good Boy™, no use of y/n Word Count: 1.6k

Jack "Whiskey" Daniels

Trussed Up by @wannab-urs Warnings: PEGGING!!! Smut, sex club stuff, dominatrix!reader, dom!reader, sub!Jack, BDSM stuff, everyone is up to date on their STD checks and birth control and such, brief mention of shibari, mommy kink!whiskey but he calls reader “Momma” and also ma’am, reader calls Jack baby, baby boy, and cowboy, rope bunny!Jack, bondage, hog tie (modified), butt plug, spanking, fingering (m receiving), begging, lots of check ins, several uses of  “good boy,” hand job (more so just teasing tbh), riding the cowboy, brief little gentle bite, unprotected PiV (but it’s about as safe as it can get… still don’t do that), creampie, aftercare, cuddling, unprofessional amounts of caring about your client. Word Count: 2.5k

Javi Gutierrez

On the First Date by @max--phillips Warnings: Pegging, obviously. Also, first dates, potentially embarrassing scenario gone very right, oral sex (reader receiving), strap on blowjob, Javi's just excited to be there, and of course some softness thrown in for fun. Word Count: 2.1k

Javier Peña

Pop Goes the Javi by @morallyinept Warnings: Pegging/rimming/anal fingering/anal penetration, M receiving/fingering F receiving/all the glorious butt stuff with Javi's pert lil' butt 🍑 Javi being a drooling mess. Word Count: 4.5k

Marcus Moreno

Same Time Next Week by @magpiepills Warnings: smut. pegging, anal, tit job, hand job, pussy job, sumata, prostate stimulation, anal fingering, sex work, coming untouched, praise kink, slight sub/dom vibes, subspace kind of, erotic massage, pining?? In my fic?? writer knows nothing about massages, many liberties taken. Word Count: 4.5k

Marcus Pike

Give and Take by @agentmarcuspike Warnings: pegging, use of a strap-on, reader doesn't have a penis, anal fingering, rimming, showering together, established romantic relationship (2+ years), lots of lube, wet wet wet (not the group), sweet sappy romance, cum play (?), coming untouched, pet names (baby, darling, good boy), begging a lil bit Word Count: 2.2k

Max Phillips

The Gift of Your Grave by @gasolinerainbowpuddles Warnings: POV switching, questionable consent if you squint due to inherent power imbalance, Max is serving cunt with side of a soft boi, pegging, butt stuff, angst, fluff, discussions about drug use/sobriety/coping mechanisms, my personal supernatural lore that exists bc I say it does, Frankie lacks confidence in himself until he embraces his super power sub status, using a dick like a pacifier (we’ve all been there), very loose workings of a dom/sub dynamic but mostly reward/punishment concepts and orgasm control Word Count: 8.1k

Maxwell Lord

Stiff by @idolatrybarbie Warnings: takes place in the 80s, fem!OC with no physical descriptions, gambling (pls don't), alcohol and references to it, descriptions of fake gore and blood, reader smokes, references to domestic violence and abuse, smut - pegging, anal fingering, come eating, praise. Word Count: 4.9k

No-outbreak Joel

Will You Show Me? by @eupheme Warnings: switch!joel and switch!reader, poly relationship, use of alcohol, light sub/dom elements, sex toys, references to threesomes, sexual photos, oral sex, anal play, pegging, joel teaches you what to do

Oberyn Martell

My Way by @lincolndjarin Warnings: five seconds of plot to build up to a whole lot of porn, pegging (obvi), medieval strap on, glass toys, fingering, oberyn sucks the strap, allusions to other partners, referring to a dildo as a cock, multiple orgasms, overstimulation if you squint, premature ejaculation?? idk he cums fast bc i'm a sucker for that, cum play, reader has brief penis envy idk if that's the term but yeah, spit as lube bc its the olden days or whatever, anal sex, soft & loving sex, sort of a gentle dom vibe from reader, they're married <3 <3 <3, aftercare, i didn't really edit this as much as i should have (i'm sleepy) so apologies in advance

Pero Tovar

The Mercenary and his Witch by @nerdieforpedro Warnings: slight misogyny (11th century people it would be weird if there wasn’t), mentions of whorehouses (it’s work - respect it), threat of violence, fingering (male and female), edging and teasing, biting, a sweet Pero?, ass play (with fingers), oral sex (female and male receiving), mentions of food (a Nerdie fic staple), pegging, cum massage and eating, aftercare Word Count: 4.8k

Post-outbreak Joel

A Bad Deal by @jksprincess10 Warnings: NON CON, DDDNE dark!reader, drugging someone without their knowledge, non consensual pegging, lots of degrading, slight somnophilia, pegging without prep, reader is crazy as fuck, mentions of blood, unprotected p in v, dom!reader, toxic relationship

Pre-outbreak Joel

Ripe by @hier--soir Warnings: pre-outbreak, set in the early 2000s, early thirties joel my lover boyy, bisexual reader, established relationship, that one shit stirring friend, brief alcohol consumption and piv sex at the onset, brief masturbation [m] in the bath, a little ass eating and fingering, a little spitting, pegging, dirty talk, praise, dildo is described as "your cock" multiple times, reach around hand job you will always be famous, they talk each other through it, the word hole is used 11 times but it feels like 100, also they're in love okay bye. Word Count: 5.3k

EXTRAS

-- here's all the fics that weren't included in the main event, but are just as delicious --

SNL Characters

Game Over by @magpiepills Mario x Princess Peach!Reader Warnings: pegging, anal fingering, dirty talk, drinking, flirting, butt plugs, use and abuse of video game imagery, crack fic, probably cringe. No use of y/n, reader is princess peach, but her hair, skin and body type aren’t described.

A Table for Two by @gasolinerainbowpuddles and @joelsgreys Mrs. Claudia Flores x the Italian Waiter x Lisa from Temecula Warnings: cracfkic, pegging, bad Italian accents, lots of culinary euphemisms, tiny font Spanish/Italian translations

Marcus Pike

Whatta Man by @atinylittlepain Warnings: this is smut, pegging, rimming, sucking and fucking, sex work, lowkey sugardaddy!marcus, sweet shy marcus getting his world rocked, and then pancakes and a blackberry and a black american express card so ya know, the works.

Ezra

Prospecting by @marisferasiop Warnings: Peg that space rat! pegging, anal fingering, anal toying, rim job, mildly degrading language, lil bit of overstim, cum as lube, cum eating, Ezra being a soft baby

Frankie Morales

My Boys by @flightlessangelwings Warnings: mmf threesome, established relationship, pegging, anal, fingering, oral (m receiving, hint at f receiving), soft dom reader, sub!Frankie, praise, pet names (babe, baby), fluff, feelings, no use of y/n

[paristheonewhoreads]

Hello & Welcome ᥫ᭡

Paris 🫶🏼, she/her , eighteen 🐈, taurus babe 🍪 , joel miller apologist 🏹, pedro pascal fan 🍓 would love more mutuals 🤞🏼💋

a little something while you scroll 🎧🤍

Master Lists 📋👨🏻‍🍳

Joel miller ⊹ ࣪ ˖

(Requests open)

Favorite Reads 🕯️🍰

smut: 🍓 fluff: ☁️ angst: 🏹

Joel Miller 🫀

Pharmacy 🍓🍓☁️ by @strang3lov3

Stari’n problem 🍓🍓🍓by @strawhbrrries

Illicit affairs 🍓🍓🍓by @schnarfer

Instagram search ☁️☁️ by @hopplessilse

Fate after all ☁️☁️ by @honeyedmiller

Sticking it to the pta 🍓🍓🍓by @walkintotheriveranddisappear

I’ll be home for Christmas ☁️🏹 by @punckock

A gentleman 🍓🍓🍓by @talaok

A future together 🍓🏹🏹☁️☁️ by @kteague

Barbie dreamhouse☁️☁️☁️ by @minispidey

I couldn’t want you anymore 🍓☁️🏹 by @stylesispunk

I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus ☁️☁️🍓🍓🍓 by @thetriumphantpanda

I’ve got my love to keep me warm ☁️☁️☁️ by @thetriumphantpanda

Nobody’s son, nobody’s daughter 🏹🏹🏹 by @fragilefable

Not a survivalist girl ☁️🏹🏹 by @tightjeansjavi and @chaotic-mystery

Child O’mine 🍓☁️🏹 by @macfrog

Fatherless 🍓🍓🍓🏹🏹🏹 by @weirdfangirly

Safe and sound ☁️☁️☁️ by @joelsgreys

Short days, long nights☁️☁️🍓🍓🏹 by @frannyzooey

Shotgun🍓🍓 by @honeyedmiller

Sleeping bag☁️☁️☁️ by @quin-ns

Smother 🍓🍓🍓🏹🏹 by @beardedjoel

Midnight tow🍓🍓🍓 by @toxicanonymity

Midnight snack🍓🍓🍓by @toxicanonymity

Neighborly love☁️☁️☁️ @kteague

Karma is my boyfriend’s dad🍓🍓🍓 by @proxima-writes

Keep you warm☁️☁️☁️ by @alwaysmicado

The webs we weave 🍓🍓🏹 by @hyzer34

Diner 🏹🏹🏹🍓🍓🍓 by @notjustjavierpena

Creep 🏹🍓🍓🍓 by @theywhowriteandknowthings

Mean 🏹🏹🏹🍓🍓 by @nehi-soda

Let it snow ☁️☁️☁️🍓🍓 by @kiwisbell

Honey-do ☁️☁️🍓🍓🍓 by @kiwisbell

Anonymous ask ☁️☁️☁️ by @talaok

Every now and then ☁️☁️☁️ by @lincolndjarin

Oh honey 🍓🍓🍓 by @lincolndjarin

Frankie Morales 💌

Twinkle 🍓🍓 by @ezrasbirdie

Just married 🍓🍓🍓☁️ by @ilovepedro

Soul of a hero🏹🏹☁️ by @kteague

Vivis costume☁️☁️☁️ by @kteague

Dave York 💋

Just a piece 🍓🍓🍓 by @palioom

Snow angles 🍓🍓🍓☁️☁️ by @palioom

Pero Tovar 🕯️

Seed 🍓🍓🍓☁️☁️☁️ by @criticallyacclaimedstranger

Dieter Bravo 🌟

A little sun ☁️☁️🍓🍓 by @auteurdelabre

More coming soon ⊹ ࣪ ˖

[beefrobeefcal]

Not his Father feat. Frankie Morales x Mouse (f!reader)

a HeftyThrowaway one shot drabble | Rated: G | word count: 528 warnings: Talk of labor, DUI, drinking, but mainly fluff A/N: Just a little insight into Frankie's thoughts on becoming a dad.

--------<3---------

Frankie soothed his hand other your back, as you were bent over the kitchen counter and rocking your hip side to side, waiting for the contraction to subside.

“Breathe, baby… don’t hold your breath… keep breathing, Mouse…”

You sucked in a breath, and Frankie’s furrowed brows softened. As much as he hated seeing you in this pain, he was just as excited that he was so close to holding the little life you’d been carrying on your own for nine months. It was almost his turn to be close to your baby and get to be a daddy.

A daddy.

Based on the relationship he had with his own dad, or lack thereof, the idea of being one should have scared him shitless. But it didn’t - most of the time. He’d had enough therapy and experiences to know he wasn’t his dad, but there were echoes of him in Frankie - his nose, his voice, his nervous ticks, his military history. Even though that didn’t make him him, he still spent nights worried he would wake up one dad and be him.

Frankie did know that one difference between them was that his dad wouldn’t have let himself indulge to the point of being twice the man he was. No, Frank Sr. would have rather drank himself into a stupor than let himself enjoy a life with the woman who loved him. He knew he didn’t want to be his father.

Frank Sr. had once told Frankie when he was young how scared he was to be a dad before his older sister, Cecelia, was born. He said it took him a while to get the hang of it, holding a little baby, and he’d even said that kids didn’t get interesting until they could talk and walk on their own. When Frankie’s sister had his nephew, he watched you hold little James, tears falling down your cheeks, and nothing could have convinced him that a baby wasn’t one of the most spectacular things on this planet. He knew he didn’t want to be his father.

He’d dropped the junior from his name the moment he was legally able to. After he had told them furiously what it would mean to him to not be tethered to an abusive drunk, serving time for a DUI that killed someone, Will and Santi helped him pay for the name change, so he would never be called Frank Jr. again. He knew he didn’t want to be his father.

When one of his aunts recounted the story of when he was born, and he was told Frank Sr. was out at the bar, refusing to come home when his mom went into labor, it was told to him like a joke. But now, watching you breathe through your own labor, the idea made him furious for his mother because even god himself couldn’t rip him from your side right now.

He knew he wasn’t his father.

The contraction passed and you stood up, still leaning on the kitchen counter. Frankie held you and splayed his hand over your belly and kissed your temple.

“You ready to be a daddy, Frankie?”

--------<3---------

TAGLIST: @theywhowriteandknowthings @harryleatherfit @toxicanonymity @harriedandharassed @neverwheremoonchild @rebel-held @beee-haw @nevergoingbacknowshine @idolatrybarbie @v4vayha @lalocitos @xdaddysprincessxx @deathsholywaterr @heareball @lyssramscal @wintrwinchestr @blackfemalenerd  @southernbe @starkeydaviss @noxturnalpascal@not-a-unique-snowflake-blog@vabeachazn @clawdee @iamasaddie @tightjeansjavi@rubyfruitjungle @littlevenicebitch69

[planet-marz1]

☆100 Followers!!!☆

A big, massive thank you to any one who has followed me. It's literally mind boggling that anyone finds the things I share interesting. I love all the moots and friends that I've made on here so far :))

So, for all of you lovelies that have followed me;

I'll be taking requests in my inbox for rec lists that have specific genres/themes/characters, look at the list below.

just a disclaimer: it might take me a minute to make these

Characters:

Din Djarin

Joel Miller

Javier Peña

Themes: angst, hurt/comfort, smut, fluff

Also, if you just wanna come share your brain rot with me in my inbox, that is very welcome as well <3

Another little face reveal for you cuties under the cut

Tagging some of my moots: @cool-iguana @chaotic-mystery @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @breakfastatjoels @jenispunk @mandoisapunk @beskarandblasters @amanitacowboy @bastardmandennis @nostalxgic @gracieheartsspedro @party-hearses @wannab-urs @worhols @gracieispunk @theywhowriteandknowthings @pamasaur @lovers-liability @joelmillersmistress

[beskarandblasters]

Frankie Morales Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Header by @theywhowriteandknowthings

All fics are Frankie Morales x F!Reader unless stated otherwise.

Individual warnings are listed at the beginning of each fic! But each fic is labeled either with smut, fluff, and/or angst.

Drabbles (Less than 1k words):

Snowball Kiss - smut

Watch the World from the Sidelines - angst

One shots (1k+ words):

Group Therapy - Featuring Tommy Miller - smut

You Hired a Cleaning Lady, Mr. Morales? - smut

Bluffing Season - smut, fluff, angst

On One Knee, On Two Knees - smut, fluff

[jeewrites]

WIP Wednesday

Tagged by @burntheedges for WIP Wednesdayyyyy! (Have I mentioned how much I love Maintenance Request? Go read it!)

So excited that Frankie and Sweets finally get to go on their date. 🥰 And eat delicious food. And experience some angst. But mostly fluff and sweetness because apparently that is all I can write at the moment, lol.

Just as you are sitting down to scarf down your lunch later that week, your phone vibrates with a text from your favorite brown-eyed pilot.

[text conversation]

😻🐟: Hey, so what kind of food do you like? 🏋🏻‍♀️: Yes 😻🐟: ???

🏋🏻‍♀️: I have to eat so much to fuel for 🏋️‍♀️, so yeah, I like food. 🏋🏻‍♀️: 🍜🍳🥩🍔🌮🥟🍣🎂🍩🍪🍮🧁🥐🫔🍧 🏋🏻‍♀️: I don't do sandwiches though 😻🐟: Roger that 🫡

😻🐟: Be ready to eat okay? Might want to wear something stretchy. Prepare yourself. 😉 🏋🏻‍♀️: 🫡 say no more. I have the perfect outfit. 😈 😻🐟: Pick you up Saturday at 4:30? I know it's early, but trust me ok? 🏋🏻‍♀️: 💃🏻💃🏻

You spend the rest of your break smiling into your lunch wondering what Frankie has planned for Saturday. The weekend couldn't come soon enough.

No pressure tagging: @joelalorian @justagalwhowrites @burntheedges @joelmillerisapunk @theywhowriteandknowthings

[theywhowriteandknowthings]

Grocery Shopping with Price

My blog is predominantly 18+ minors DNI

No warnings but there are mentions of food, reader is able to have periods, but otherwise blank slate. 632~ Words Lynx is the UK brand name for Axe body spray

Price just likes letting you take control in these scenarios.

Yes, he’s happy to meal plan and list build with you, he loves that aspect, it’s very on-brand for him. But when it comes to strolling through the aisles, picking things out off the shelves, he leaves the control to you.

You send him off to retrieve things from across the store and he comes back with exactly what you ask for without fail.

Sometimes he’ll remember other things from the list on the way, piling up impossibly large amounts of produce and dry goods in his muscular arms. He even hid a jar of your favourite night-cream under his boonie hat that one time that had you crying with laughter.

Today you’re in the fresh produce aisle, poking and prodding, groping and grabbing at different fruits and veggies to determine ripeness and freshness. You’re cramping like mad, and you’ve sent John off to get the majority of the shop as you hobble around, clutching at the trolley for dear life.

You’re two days into one of the worst periods of your adult life, and already wishing you’d just got John to do the shop so you could stay home cradling a hot water bottle. You’re minding your own business as a shadow looms over your shoulder.

“Need a hand there, pet?” An unfamiliar grunt makes you pause as you slowly turn to look up to address the source of the intrusion.

The man is your typical sleazy gym bro with gelled hair and a smirk that you guess is permanently etched on his smug mouth. The overwhelming stench of Lynx Africa rolling off him in waves. You crinkle your nose at the offensive odour, reminding you of high school locker rooms and pubescent boys.

“I’m good, thanks,” you say, immediately turning back to your trolley, hoping to move on, even if you hadn’t got what you were looking for.

Deescalate.

You can almost hear John’s voice in your head as you feel the dude-bro shadowing your hasty retreat.

“Aw,” he groans, practically jogging to catch up to you, “Don’t be like that, what’s your hurry?”

“I’m here to shop, not get hit on by some dickhead with an ego,” you snap, letting your hormonal rage seep out as the guy just doesn’t take the hint.

“Woah, no need to be a bitch,” the fuck-head says with wild gesticulation of his hands, “You on the rag love?”

You’re about to snip back at him when your trolley collides with something solid. You groan and are about to spool up a profanity ridden apology when you hear a familiar growl.

“So what if she is?” John snarls as you look up to see his arms laden with what seems like every item on the list as he glowers at the douchebag at your elbow.

“Whatever man,” he scoffs at John as he holds his hands up in cocky compliance, “Have the bitter bitch.”

“You watch your mouth,” John says as he meticulously stacks the produce in the trolley, not once taking his stormy blue eyes off the other man, “Or we’re going to have a problem.”

“John,” you intercede, already over this whole dick waving competition, even if you do love it when he gets like this, “Let’s just get home, yeah?”

“Whatever you need,” he says as he finishes loading up the trolley. You finish the shop quickly, with John insisting he drives you home and gets you tucked up in bed as soon as possible.

It’s not until he takes off his hat while unloading the groceries that he realises he still had a bag of your favourite sweets stuck under his boonie hat. He makes a mental note to go back tomorrow and pay for them.

CoD Masterlist Grocery Shopping with Gaz Grocery Shopping with Ghost Grocery Shopping with Soap Grocery Shopping with König

[chaotic-iguana]

PLEASE I'm requesting any Pedro boy taking care of sick reader and being all cute I just. I'm so sick rn please I need some new delusionals in my mind

a/n: please gws sending u the best hug and soup ever i hope you feel better (and have a javi to take care of u). did my best considering i havent written in a while, lmk what u think

feeling better

javier peña x reader

warnings: fluff, sickness | 0.36k | masterlist

“cariño?” 

javier’s voice rung out in your shared apartment, a tremor of anxiety creeping into his tone at the sight of the scattered blankets, clothes and tissues gracing your living room floor. he shut the door softly, footsteps silent as he inched closer to the bedroom at the sound of your sniffle. gently pushing the door open, he stuck his head inside and found you curled up on the bed, balled up in what looked like-was it four-multiple blankets, shivering with a near-empty box of tissues on the bedside. 

“oh, honey.” walking up to you, he caught sight of your half-closed swollen eyes, your nose and cheeks tinged red as you sneezed again. bringing a hand to your forehead, he shushed your whine when his fingers pulled away. 

you cracked an eye open, hissing against the sunlight to watch his furrowed brows and eyes wide with worry. making a valiant attempt to say “go away, javi ‘m sick, it might spread,” you groaned and half-babbled incoherently, trying to roll yourself away from him, just getting yourself tangled in the blankets in the process. he huffed at the sight before gently gripping your ankle to get it out of the mess you’d made, planting a kiss on your forehead before bending to pick up the used tissues littering the floor under the opposite wall. 

your eyes have fluttered shut by the time he turns back to you, and the fact that you’d insisted you were alright just this morning paired with the stubborn pout of your lips - even in sleep - makes him smile, before shaking his head and getting to work. time to bust out his mother’s fail-safe chicken soup recipe. 

three days later, when the shine returns to your eyes and your fever finally flushes out, you make a joke about how much of a mother hen he’d become when you were sick - hovering, panicking, setting alarms for your medicine and refusing to leave your bedside at any given time. 

which is why you aren’t too surprised when a week later, javi’s the one in bed.

at least you’re stocked up on medicine. and chicken soup. 

hello loves, thank you for reading mwah. comment your thoughts or find me on ao3.

taglist: @imherefordeanandbones, @theywhowriteandknowthings, @josephquinnswhore, @millerscoffee, @nostalxgic, @sscorpiiio, @pedrosaidsheispunk, @its-nebuleuse, @sofiparallel, @mandoisapunk, @bastardmandennis, @pawnshopb1ues, @amanitacowboy, @party-hearses, @planet-marz1, @chiogarza, @jenispunk,

dividers by @saradika

HUGE THANKS TO @bastardmandennis for looking over this ily sm

[wannab-urs]

The Spreadsheet Digest | Vol 30

Howdy folks :)

Welcome to the THIRTIETH Spreadsheet Digest!!

I started reading a few series this week, and I'm not putting them on the spreadsheet til I've finished them; so, if I told you I'm reading your fic but it's not here, that's why. Eleven fics this week (Dieter, Joel, Din, Ezra, Javi P, and a Marcus P/Din/Reader)!

Fic Rec Masterlist | My Masterlist | My Kofi

Recs Below The Pedge

In Fiction - Dieter one shot by @sin-djarin

Summary: Dieter comes to bed. Tags: Established relationship, mentions of self doubt, no physical description of reader, no dialogue, no use of y/n. Thoughts: This was so sweet. I just want to hold him and pet his hair, fr.

In Reality - Dieter one shot by @sin-djarin

Summary: Dieter comes home for Christmas. Tags: Established relationship, masturbation (M), Dieter's self deprecation, no physical description of reader, no use of y/n. Thoughts: I'm just extremely obsessed with the nailing of Dieter's characterization here. He's a little gross and sad, but it's endearing. Poor baby can't keep his phone charged to save his life. And I love how reader just like... knows he's a mess and is okay with it. It's a little bittersweet? In a way that I adore.

O, Christmas Tree - Dieter one shot by @covetyou

Summary: As PA to Dieter Bravo, you were used to the strange, unusual and downright weird. What you weren't used to was taking in a shipment of - what? And how many? Tags: sex toys (so many butt plugs), Dieter being a menace to his PA, no smut, pure silliness. Thoughts: This is so delightfully silly. And they do kind of look like christmas trees.

The hat stays on - Joel one shot by @theywhowriteandknowthings

Summary: Hooking up with a cowboy in a bar bathroom... kind of. Tags: sub/dom dynamics, Sub!Joel, Switch!Joel, Public sex, Bathroom Sex, Squirting, orgasm denial(mention). Purely Porn with no Plot. Thoughts: I love these lil plot twist fics, I love cowboy hat joel, I love sub/switch!Joel, I love this.

To Know the Light - Din one shot by @burntheedges

Summary: to go in the dark with a light is to know the light. Tags: fluff, a teensy bit of angst, introspection, winter, food mention, reader has no description, gn!reader Thoughts: Din's internal struggle with removing the helmet is such a fascinating aspect of his character, and I think you did a beautiful job of capturing it here. I thought the imagery, the characterization, and the story telling in general here was just gorgeous.

Killshot - Ezra series by @magpiepills

Summary: A lonesome prospector comes face to face with a dangerous stranger. What happens when you can’t resist his charm? Tags: SMUT, PIV, fingering, oral (m&f receiving) pet names, spanking, dub con, angst, anal play, deep throating, cum eating, thigh riding, dirty talk, double penetration, toys, teasing, no use of y/n, no physical description of reader. Thoughts: This shit had me YELLING!!! Dirty Dog Ezra in full force here. I am still shook and I read this like 4 days ago.

Dare to Surrender - Javi P series by @auteurdelabre

Summary: “First to come loses.” You can’t stand Javier Pena but when Steve Murphy makes an off-hand remark that gets both you and Javier’s competitive sides going, there’s no telling how far you’ll go. Tags: Office Sex, Enemies to Lovers, Blow Jobs, Office Blow Jobs, Face-Fucking, Dare, Co-workers, soft!javi p, Dirty Talk, Dirty Thoughts, Pet Names, Jealous!Javier Peña, Phone Sex, Jealousy, Steve Murphy cockblock, Desk Sex, No Pregnancy, Banter, Bonding, Bets & Wagers, Vaginal Fingering, Fingerfucking, Finger Sucking, hey we said no kissing, he falls first, no protection, From Sex to Love, Rough Sex, Oral Sex, Vaginal Sex, Semi-Public Sex, P in V sex, Sweet!Javi, Nicknames Thoughts: I loved this storyyyyy. Javi was so pathetically in love with her and so bad at saying it. Brad sucks, btw, but I love how jealous he made Javi. P.S if you like the whole bet concept + Javi P check out Go Ahead I Dare Ya. It's a slightly different premise, but so very good.

Handsome, Dirty, Rich - Joel one shot by @pedgito

Summary: the rich father of your best friend, sarah — joel miller, was a mystery to you until one day he isn't and you quickly find that your interest in him isn't one-sided. Tags: no use of y/n, au/no outbreak, bfd!joel, ceo!joel, mentions of reader growing up poor/absent parents (joel is ridiculously loaded, it's fic y'all let me live lol), sneaking around, age gap (not explicitly specified, but reader is in final year of college and joel is probs late 40s/50s), vacations, gift-giving, unprotected piv, come swallowing, daddy issues if you squint, one (1) pussy slap, oral (f receiving), semi-public fucking Thoughts: The buildup was immaculate AGH. And I am obsessed with the kind of not quite happy ending? Part 2 maybe?

Comfort, Despite the Storm - Joel one shot by @marisferasiop

Summary: Joel's neighbor (you) is the town archivist and brings him a present on his birthday (with a side of teasing). Later, after waking from his own nightmares, he finds you sleepless on your porch during a storm and you take comfort in one another. Tags: fluff, smut, nightmares, alcohol, p in v sex, oral m receiving Thoughts: Love a lil continuous hookup situation. I adore how they get together in this and how reader takes the lead in the situation. And like the fic overall is sweet and flirty, but that smut is hot.

Misfire - Dieter one shot by @qveerthe0ry

Summary: Dieter gets waxed for a role and gets a little too excited. Tags: dubious consent, body hair waxing, pain kink, humiliation kink (kinda), subby!Dieter, ruined orgasm, coming untouched, hands-free orgasm, reader does not engage in sex acts, mentions of alcohol, mentions of drug use, accidental exhibitionism, accidental voyeurism Thoughts: Pathetic, whiny, whimpering, humiliation kink Dieter? Yeah. Yes. Thank you. Perfection. And if you want a version where reader plays along instead of ignoring him read that here.

Closure - Marcus P/Din one shot by @javier-pena

Summary: Marcus, Din and you used to be best friends. Now you're on opposite sides of the law with a decade worth of grudges between you. But hate can quickly become something else ... Tags: angst | canon-typical violence | mentions of food and alcohol and smoking | they’re all mean to each other and they have a difficult relationship | (a lot of) dirty talk (by my standards) | slight power imbalance | reader has hair that can be grabbed | threesome m/f/(m) (kinda) | ecouteurism | voyeurism | exhibitionism | a bit of edging | fingering | competitiveness | (unprotected) piv sex | creampie | a tiny, tiny bit of degradation Thoughts: Marcus and Din is a pairing I truly never thought I would see, but I am obsessed with this pairing. The way their personalities mesh is just stunning. I love the characterization of all three of them. I'm not usually one to read Din AUs where he's not some sort of Mandalorian, but I truly could not resist reading this. Everything about this fic was amazing. Reader's story, Marcus and Din's relationship, the setting, everything was just so good AHGHGGH.

--------------

This week I posted:

Scotty Doesn't Know - a Dieter one shot

Summary: Scotty doesn't know you're hooking up with Dieter Tags: songfic, smut, infidelity, dieter is a loser, scotty doesn't really deserve this he's just annoying, crack taken seriously, porn with the barest of plots, barely edited. WC: 2.8k

---------------

Happy Reading!

[nerdieforpedro]

WIP Wednesday/Thursday

I was tagged by @pedroshotwifey and @theywhowriteandknowthings ❤️ ❤️

It was hard to decide which two WIPs I was going to do snippets of because I have so many. 👀 If I mention starting any more series and not just one shots, smack me. I should not have 11, I kid you not, 11 ongoing series. I went through my masterlist thinking it was like 5-6. 🤨 I was very wrong. Like Geez.... I gotta finish something. 🫣

Anyway, snippet one - from chapter 2 of Roc & Doc not finished yet:

Your face hardens at your friend’s joke and you start nervously pressing your hands together. At least it wasn’t the trenchcoat one she likes to make, thank goodness. Tim looked back at the door and stood up, shaking his head. “Hey Kim. Just knew Doc would want to hear how the case turned out. I’m going to head out Doc. I’m going to go make sure Stevenson isn’t still working on the homicide from last week. He makes fun of my chicken scratch, but he types slow as hell for someone fifteen years younger than me. Good night Doc, don’t steal anymore pens. I know she’ll be your accomplice.” Rockford nods, gives you a smile and once at the doorway, cuts his eyes at Kira before leaving.  

Kim plops down across from you and snickers. “Did the famed detective get a bit pissed at me because I came between him and his dear Doc? For shame and I guess I did know you were taking his pens. To be fair, I did tell you to stop several times.” She playfully tapped her own hand as if she was being reprimanded. You sat back in your chair and shook your head. She’s been teasing you about this for as long as you had stolen that man’s pens well after. Tim didn’t tease you as much anymore, well sometimes when you got in the car and he asked to see your hands to make sure you didn’t remove anything from his glove box or console.

Snippet two is from a series I plan to start in March. It's for a Pedro character I only recently started writing for. 🥸 (Is included in the 11 series - that number still freaks me out. like that many unfinished ideas. 😭)

A moonbeam. It’s the first thing he thought of when he saw her. She was wearing a white nightgown - if he had to guess cotton with a thin robe about her shoulders that she decided to slip off. That’s a good choice, it’s a bit warm out tonight. Her hair is under a purple bonnet which she removes as well and sets it on top of the robe, both are on the back of her rocking chair. Black voluminous hair fell around her shoulders, it looked pillowy to the touch like the rest of its owner.  Her substantial legs carried her to a small table beside her where she lit a candle. The minimal light makes her face glow. He can make out full lips, round cheeks and bright eyes behind her glasses. She eases down into her rocking chair and pours herself a brown liquid that looks similar to his and orange juice maybe? Well she could be one for mixed drinks. He wonders why she would be up at this ungodly hour drinking? She couldn’t have similar demons to him could she? Maybe some unknown fears or known fears? Could she be separating herself from someone inside the home? 

I wonder which character it is? ☺️

Honorable mentions: Dave/Santi, Pero/Jack, Weddings 101 with Dieter, Jake Lockley fic, Santiago angst/fluff, Disco Dieter.

These aren't any less important, my motivation waxes and wanes, very often. 🤔

NPT: @maggiemayhemnj @megamindsecretlair @perotovar @daddy-dins-girl @trulybetty @joels-shitty-puns @magpiepills @gemmahale @tinytinymenace @movievillainess721 @alltheglitterandtheroar @grogusmum @soft-girl-musings @ilovepedro @beefrobeefcal @agentjackdaniels @javierpena-inatacvest @rhoorl @mysterious-moonstruck-musings @reallyrallyauthor @saturn-rings-writes

Sorry if you've done it already. ☺️

(Nerdie trying to think of how she's actually going to finish all the series she started - an entire mess of her own making) 😂

[theywhowriteandknowthings]

Grocery Shopping with John “Soap” MacTavish

My Blog is 18+ NSFW | Minors DNI | Some suggestive themes here but mostly just fluff.

(477 word Drabble)

Grocery shopping with Johnny is a nightmare.

No matter how hard you try to keep to the list, there’s always something extra to pull his attention away from you.

Don’t let him out of your sight, the moment you lose line of sight, you’re done for. Turn to grab a bag of crisps for your movie session later? Rookie mistake.

Johnny’s half-way to the freezers to get ice-cream, popsicles, you name it. Man will return triumphantly with four household’s worth of frozen goods.

Never send him off to get something, even if it is just an aisle over. You’ll spend ten minutes trying to find him, only to have him trot up to you from behind as you start to call his phone to track him down.

“Was just over there lass, you fuss too much, you know?” He’ll say with the most oblivious grin on his face as he deposits that bath soak/face mask/sweet treat you’ve been talking about all week, “You deserve to treat yerself sometimes.”

He’s also the type to run into six different people in one shopping trip, waylaying your plans by at least half an hour. He’s too kind to interrupt people, letting them prattle on about their lives without pause as you stand there dumbfounded.

Where does he meet all these people?

“Johnny,” you grumble, “Who was that?” You’ll ask as you practically push him away from the scary looking giant of a man with a Germanic accent.

“Just an old army buddy,” he’ll say with a bright smile, but you know that’s a gross oversimplification, “Now what’s next on the list?”

You sigh as you look down to see a half-full trolley and only three items actually crossed off the hand-written notepad. It’s always an adventure doing your weekly shop with Johnny, but Jesus, there’s a reason you usually do it when he’s otherwise occupied with work, or out with his friends.

But you don’t mind, not when he’s wrapping his arms around your waist from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder.

“Ah, I’ve side-tracked yer plans haven’t I, hen?” He’ll murmur apologetically in your ear as you sag back against him.

“Only a little,” you lie, a smile gracing your lips as he presses a kiss to your temple.

“How about I go wait in the car?” He offers and you almost want to tell him to stay, but your stomach rumbles and you laugh in unison.

“Alright, but crack a window,” you tease and Johnny flashes you a goofy smile before giving you a mock salute.

You watch him go, already missing his presence, but the risk of melting frozen goods spurs you on.

Plus, you noticed the little bottle of lube he deposited in the trolley on the way out, and you’re looking forward to what he has in store to make it up to you.

CoD Masterlist Grocery Shopping with Gaz Grocery Shopping with Ghost Grocery Shopping with Price Grocery Shopping with König

[chaotic-iguana]

OKAY OKAY!!

Soft! Joel where he’s had a rough day & reader looks after him. Gives him a bath & all that goodness. No smut just pure fluff of Joel needing readers comfort and reassurance 😭😭😭😭😭

HELLO my love yes ofCOURSE i got u. let’s fucking GO:

Burrow | joel x reader

set in the refuge universe

wordcount: 0.38k 

You could see it in his eyes the second you opened the door for him. The weight of the day clung to him, from his slumped shoulders to the red rims of his eyes. The smudges under his lash line. The wrinkles on his face looked deeper, cheeks more hollow. 

You said nothing, just grasped his hand lightly and led him towards the bathroom, stopping outside only to gently pull his clothes off of him. Fingers soft as they cradled his skin, skimming his ribs and the v of his hips as you knelt down to shimmy him out of his jeans. When you straightened and looked at him, there were tears glistening on his cheeks. Reaching a thumb out to swipe them away, you tugged your own shirt over your head and ripped off your trousers, turning the water on and adjusting the temperature for it to be just the way he liked it. 

You climbed into the shower, him clambering in behind you, and ran a washcloth under the water to wipe it over his arms, legs, and chest with such reverence it felt almost laughable to be treating a man of his size as if he were fragile. Though that wasn’t too far from the truth. Hands massaging soap into his hair, your nails scraped his scalp and he tensed for a second, before melting into your touch even further, sighing in relief. You tapped his cheek to make him tilt his head back, repeating the soothing circles into his hair to rinse it out. Joel reached for your soap, but your hand came around his wrist - or tried to. It was so thick that your fingers didn’t touch - but in this moment, you couldn’t care less. This was for him. You didn’t want him to reciprocate. 

The both of you stood under that shower long after the water ran cold, Joel pressing his face into your collarbone as he slumped against you, gripping you hard enough to bruise - desperation making him wrack in shuddering sobs. You couldn’t do much but circle your arms around him, holding him just as tightly. You’d let him burrow into you and hide in your skin if it meant he’d feel whole again. 

And so you held him until he did. 

hello loves, as always - thank you for reading. comment your thoughts or find me on ao3. stay hydrated and have a great day!  taglist (lmk if u wanna be taken off, no hard feelings): @imherefordeanandbones, @theywhowriteandknowthings, @josephquinnswhore, @millerscoffee, @nostalxgic, @sscorpiiio, @pedrosaidsheispunk, @its-nebuleuse, @sofiparallel, @mandoisapunk, @bastardmandennis, @pawnshopb1ues, dividers by @reveriesources (the best.)