#this has been on my blog before but never been tagged properly.

[christiangeistdorfer]

ILKKA KIVIMÄKI, MAURIZIO PERISSINOT & CHRISTIAN GEISTDÖRFER having a rest stop during the 1983 PORTUGAL RALLY

[ask-haruka-sawamura]

Hi everybody!! I'm so glad you guys seem to be excited for this!! I've already gotten a lot of submissions so far ⟨(0o0)/

Unfortunately, I made this blog in a very busy season at my school... I have a bit too much homework to respond quickly for now. I promised Uncle Kaz I wouldn't let this distract me too much. I guess I didn't plan that well... oops. _(>.<)_ But I'm looking forward to going through them when I get the chance!! I'll try not to keep you all hanging for too long, okay? Oh, and don't feel like you have to stop sending things in in the meantime. I'll be fine!!

Thank you so much everyone, and I hope you have a good day!! <3

[peachsayshi]

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄ blessings ⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

↬ summary: nanami kento tries to be the perfect husband and father but when a tough night fighting curses ends badly it results in nanami snapping at his daughter. 

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ minors / ageless / blank blogs (dni) ↬･tags: nanami x female reader; hurt/comfort; nanami has a daughter; domestic drama; being a jujutsu sorcerer is hard; momotarō is a famous Japanese folk tale :c ↬･ wc: 3,383

↬ notes: hi, everyone! I'm currently not really active at the moment so please don't feel disheartened if I haven't been responding to your messages or tagged posts. I'm taking a small break and only coming online for a bit to catch up on some messages, read fics or queue posts. I'll be back to properly posting and interacting soon but in the meantime I wanted to share that I finished up this draft over the weekend. I was actually debating if I should post this but then just decided to go for it! sending all my love xx

nanami’s head is heavy, completely clouded with despair, and it tints his brown eyes a shade of murky gray. the walls of his beautiful home feel narrow, almost claustrophobic, which explains why he’s struggling to catch his breath right now. stepping into the hallway, he instinctively peeks into the dining area to find you and his daughter eating dinner together. she’s sitting on the chair, her legs far too short to even touch the ground, holding a half eaten onigiri between her small hands. you are by her side, sneakily tidying up after her as you brush away the stray beads of rice trickling onto the table. 

a little glow blooms in nanami’s heart at the sight of you both but there is a vicious creature residing in the pit of his stomach that veils the bright light away. 

he quietly takes off his jacket, his bruised fingers loosening the tie around his neck. he clears his throat before announcing with exhaustion to you both that he’s finally home. 

your eyes meet his, the muscles on your face falling immediately. he can practically feel the blood rushing through your veins as worry washes over you. the reaction makes his chest uncomfortably tight, but he knows that he can’t hide his expressions around you like he used to. 

you both move together so fluidly now, like a single body of water that ebbs and flows to its own natural current. 

he escaped the night’s fight with a few cuts and a couple of bad bruises, but there is currently a student on shoko’s table who barely made it through. the young man arrived at jujutsu tech only a couple of weeks ago, but his naive and charismatic qualities turned into fatal flaws in the world of sorcery.

he bit off more than he could chew by trying to take on a special grade curse.  

shoko promised nanami that she would heal the boy, but admitted there was only so much she can do in regards to the aftermath of his injuries. the sorcerer couldn’t bare to leave him behind, but gojo refused that he stay and insisted that he return back home to his pretty wife and adorable daughter immediately. 

“I’ll handle things from here,” is what his superior said, while nanami’s guilt climbed up his throat. 

that student was his responsibility... 

...and he failed him entirely. 

“papa’s home!” his daughter chirps. the pitch of her voice ringing in nanami’s ears to pull him back to the present and far away from the scene where life and death were dancing together in a tango.  “papa, look, look...mama and I made onigiri!” 

her feet bounces up and down, and there’s a touch of a pink against her cheeks when her mouth stretches into a beaming grin. the innocence in her eyes makes nanami falter and he can feel himself falling deeper into the abyss. for a minute he resents himself for selfishly bringing such a beautiful thing into this world, only to gamble with the fact that she may potentially be in his shoes one day. 

he begs for that outcome to never happen, beseeches whatever higher power above him that exists to spare her from this life. she should never have to go through this, never have to experience these heartbreaks that only wither a person down. 

“I can see that,” nanami replies in a low voice before shifting his attention to his feet. 

right now, he can’t stomach an ounce of her purity, and it radiates around her like a halo. she's so unbothered by his presence, so completely unaware of the sudden change in the atmosphere around her... 

“we made tuna, salmon, and veggies...” she babbles on. 

“how nice...” nanami curtly interrupts, before anxiously running his fingers through the strands of his messy blonde hair. 

“which one do you want, papa?” she questions eagerly, pointing her sticky hands at the plate to show off the selection of triangles. 

“sweets,” you interject just as nanami turns on his heel to walk in the other direction, “how about we finish up eating our dinner, and we can save some for your daddy tomorrow...”

“nooo!” she whines far too loudly, which forces nanami to stop dead in his tracks. he glances over his shoulder to see her puffing out her bottom lip with disappointment, “you said...you said we make it so we eat together!” 

she’s only six. 

she can’t perceive that her father is struggling to hold himself together. deep down inside nanami knows that, but it isn’t enough to keep his cool. he doesn’t know why his daughter’s insistence causes him to pinch the front of his brows with annoyance or why he shoots a frustrated look in her direction. 

he doesn’t know why he’s suddenly picturing shoko calling the student’s parents to deliver the news that the man who was supposed to protect their child was unsuccessful in his duty. 

he doesn’t know why he feels at fault for everything that happened, even though the circumstances of the events were completely out of his control.  

he doesn’t know why he’s imagining himself on the receiving end of a very similar call, or why he can’t stop picturing his precious daughter on that table instead…

all of this pummels into him, and the monster emerges out from it’s cave.  

“be quiet and stop making such a fuss.” 

his voice comes out sharper than expected, and the expulsion of his frustration allows him to see the crystal clear picture before him. 

the room is dead silent. 

your face is in full shock at the hissing tone of your sweet husband snapping at his darling baby girl who he only ever speaks to with a gentle voice. 

what truly unravels nanami is the look that his daughter is giving him - her angelic features are sullen, but her eyes remain wide with surprise. her bottom lip is slack, and the only sound he can hear is her uneasy breathing. her eyes, the most beautiful gems in existence, twinkle as tears begin to form and she tries to quickly blink them away before turning her attention back to her plate.  

nanami doesn’t know he managed to stop time itself but the three of you remain frozen in place. 

he regrets his words immediately. 

he wants nothing more than to pull his precious girl close into his chest and smother her with apologies. the part of him with sense tells him to follow through and make things right with her, but instead he begrudgingly continues to wallow in his own self pity as he walks over to his room. 

･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･

the house is unusually quiet now, the music of domestic joy morphing into hushed murmurs and whispers outside your room door. you settle your crestfallen daughter into her bedroom before moving to check on your husband next. 

fresh out of the shower, nanami is seated on the edge of the bed with his exhausted eyes pressed firmly into the palms of his hands. he exhales a heavy breath, his dirty work clothes still piled just outside the bathroom, and your heart nearly collapses seeing him in such a state of disarray.

you kneel before him, two hands sliding across the soft material of his sweats as you brush them along his thighs before carefully bringing them up to circle around his wrists. 

“kento?” 

he allows you to pull his palms away but your throat constricts when a band forms tightly around your neck. you swallow the lump with an upturn of your brows as you are greeted with red, exhausted eyes. you cup that handsome face in your hands, your thumbs sweetly motioning back and forth across his cheeks as you try to soothe the tension away. 

after all this time together, it hurts you to see that he still tries to hide his tears. nanami constantly holds himself to the highest standard, always ensuring that he can solidify himself as the rock for you and your daughter to depend on through thick and thin. it’s so rare for you to see him crack, to watch him crumble under the overbearing weight of the things that he is burdened to carry. 

“you had a rough night,” you point out in a low, sympathetic voice and he simply just nods his head in acknowledgement. 

his eyes flutter close again when you lean forward to press a tender, reassuring kiss on his brow. “you want a talk about it?” 

the way his voice shakes makes you shiver, but you tentatively listen as he relays the events of the night before finally concluding that satoru called him only a few minutes ago to reassure him that the student in question is alright. 

“he lost an eye, but at least he’s alive...” he concludes somberly, the warble in his final statement prompting you to wrap your arms around his neck as you pull him in for a protective hug. 

nanami receives it with gratitude, strong arms circling around your waist as he buries his nose into the crook of your shoulder and breathes in.

your scent is a reminder of his permanent sanctuary.

a safety, a reassurance of home.

you stroke his blonde locks between your fingers until he exhales, "i'm so sorry," he breathes, "I...I didn't mean to snap like that..."

a tiny smile tugs at the corners of your lips, and you unravel yourself to cup his jaw into your palms once again. "I appreciate the apology, but I don't think I should be on the receiving end of it..." you hint sweetly.

nanami closes his eyes guiltily. "I'm a horrible father."

you click your tongue with disappointment, your face falling as your disapproval pinches between the space of your brows.

"you're just human," you remind him defensively, "you're a wonderful father, the best man that our daughter can look up to"

"did you see the look on her face?" he replies, his voice unnaturally small. the tender expression he gives you is filled with regret, and it's enough to make your heart ache all over again.

"kento," you contend, "don't do this to yourself. we're both going to have days where we mess up, but that doesn't mean that the problem can't be fixed."

you thread his hair between your fingers, like your brushing through rays sunlight. "she's waiting for me to read her a bedtime story," you explain, "but I'm sure she would rather be with you instead..."

"I doubt that," your husband replies as he reaches for your hand to kiss the inside of your palm.

"we will always love you, kento," you answer back, "unconditionally. on your good days and your bad ones"

he didn't even know how desperately he needed to hear that, for your certainty to remedy away all his sorrows, until they actually left your lips.

your husband's throat tightens, tears pricking his eyes once more but he hides them away when he leans in to seek out a kiss from the woman whose heart he deeply adores.

･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･

nanami leans his shoulder against the frame of his daughter's room. his heart patters lightly, making him realize that he might actually be nervous. it's strange, he thinks, that he would feel hesitant to approach his own child considering that he was her guardian but nanami had never allowed his professional life to fracture into his personal one like this before.

she's seated on the floor next to a pile of books and her stuffed rabbit secured tightly underneath her arm. there's a warmth in his chest when when he makes note of the soft toy, because he purchased that himself the day she was born and the pair have been inseparable ever since.

he clears his throat, bringing his scuffed knuckles to gently knock on the door.

"my love?" he calls out to her.

his daughter perks up, her breathing changing slightly as it rises and falls with a hint of apprehension. she glances over her shoulder to see him.

"where's mama?" she asks, her question shattering the man into a million pieces at her subtle dismissal.

"taking a shower," he answers cooly, "but I'm here to get you ready for bed..."

her lovely eyes refuse to lock into his own, and she simply tucks her lip between her bottom teeth to avoid giving nanami a reply.

she looks so much like him when he was a child. he remembered when his parents used to scold him too, and how he would also hide away in his room. the only difference is that nanami's parents were far more traditional - a time where elders were never submissive to young hearts.

"may I come in?" he requests politely, ensuring that his daughter knew she had a choice if she wanted to speak to him.

her nostrils flare slightly while she considers him, but to his relief she nods her head eagerly.

nanami steps into her room, always feeling largely out of place amongst her things. "did you find a story for bed?" he asks.

she again quietly nods her head and picks up her favorite book; a compilation of japanese folktales with beautiful illustrations. you both have been reading one for her each night ever since she got it it as a present from her grandparents.

he crouches on his knees to meet her at eye level. "you've really been enjoying this one, haven't you?" he carries on, hoping to coax more words out of her.

“yeah,” she replies in the same mousy voice of uncertainty. she shifts her attention away when she stands on her feet, clutching onto the stuffed bunny tightly while her other hand swings the book by her side.

“and what tale are we reading tonight?”

she shrugs her shoulders with indifference, a hint of pink blushing her cheek. “I dunno. I…I can just until mama is ready…”

nanami visibly slumps. her rejection an entirely new painful experience that he's never endured before. he scratches the back of his head anxiously, finding himself at a loss for words. the seconds pass, an awkward bubble surrounding both father and daughter. it’s only broken when nanami exhales a sigh, and reaches his hands towards her waist to draw her into his frame.

“darling,” he addresses tenderly, “can you look at me?”

“no, you were mean…” she blurts out, her bottom lip trembling slightly.

nanami’s heart sinks.

that’s the first time he’s ever heard those words from her lips.

“I know,” he murmurs shamefully.

her mouth forms into a tiny button of a pout but she meets his eyes for the first time as he acknowledges his behavior.

nanami arches forward to kiss her forehead, “I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that, sweetheart. I’m so sorry if I upset or scared you”

she fidgets with the book in her hand. “did you not want onigiri?” she asks, her innocence tugging the corners of her father’s lips into a small grin.

“it wasn’t the onigiri, my love,” he reassures, “daddy just…had a bad day at work…”

“why was it bad?”

nanami sighs once again.

she still doesn’t know that he’s a sorcerer. you’ve both reduced his position to her by simply explaining that nanami “helps and protects people".

thankfully your daughter doesn’t pry too hard to ask any further questions.

“someone I know got hurt. so, daddy was a little shaken up when he came home…”

"shaken up?"

"scared, my love"

his daughter shakes her head in disbelief, “nu-uh, you never get scared, papa” she rebuts.

nanami huffs out a laugh, flashing her a full grin now as he brings his fingers to his chin to to ponder her sweet statement. he quirks his brow and cheekily replies, "we can't all be brave like you," in an attempt to lighten the mood.

his daughter narrows her eyes towards his hand, her mind instantly distracted with other things already. "you got hurt too papa!" she gasps, dropping the bunny by her side to point at his knuckles.

nanami glances at his fingers covered in red marks.

"wait!" she exclaims as she places the book by his side. "I have something!"

she spins on her heel and rushes towards one of her drawers. meanwhile, nanami just takes her in with his love soaked eyes, watching as she rummages through her stuff with determination until she scurries back his way.

"got it!" she squeaks with a smile, and to his surprise she jumps right into his arms with such nonchalance it nearly make him crumble on the spot.

your voice echoes in the back of his mind: "we will always love you, kento. unconditionally. on your good days and your bad ones"

"mama bought it for me," she explains, regaining her father's attention once more.

nanami rests his cheek on her shoulder, and inhales her powdery scent as he keeps one arm warmly secured around her waist. he watches her peel off the plaster of the band aid, lbefore grabbing his hand and placing it unevenly over his knuckles.

"now a kiss!" she adds, as she brings his hand to her mouth and exaggerates a loud "mwah" sound for emphasis. "mama says the kiss is what makes it all better"

nanami instantly feels significantly better from this remedy of love. he extends his digits out, and looks at the hot pink "hello kitty" band aid that now rests comfortably on his knuckles.

"thank you, my darling," he coos and peppers her cheek with a few kisses before turning her to face him once again. "you made me feel a lot better"

she flashes him an equally large smile in return, showing off her missing teeth.

"I did?"

nanami chuckles as he scoops her up in his arms to give her a well deserved bear hug. she laughs as he stands on his two feet, and sheds away any lingering thoughts of apprehension that may have stuck.

"you always do," he reassures, his soul vibrating back to life when he feels her return his embrace. “you think you can forgive me for how I spoke earlier?”

“yeah,” she confirms and squeezes him just a little tighter. "I love you lots, papa"

"oh, my angel," he hums, "you have no idea just how much I love you too..."

･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･

after winding down from your evening pampering session, you decide to pass by your daughter's room to check on your little family. you peer through the cracked door to find nanami spread out on your daughter’s bed, with your daughter curled into side and her head resting on his chest.

“did I come from a peach too like momotarō?” you hear her ask, but your heart flutters at the sight of your husband’s pearly whites.

you’ll never get over how much you love seeing him smile with such genuine emotion.

“no,” you hear nanami reply calmly, his finger lightly holding the page open. “you remember your mother explaining how you used to live in her stomach first?”

“oh yeah,” your daughter replies with a hint of disappointment over the fact that she was not birthed from a piece of fruit as mentioned in one of her favorite folk tales.

“shall I carry on?”

“uh-huh,” she answers and she readjusts her position to get even more comfortable. "I think if we look hard enough we might find momotarō..."

"you think so?" your husband wonders with honest curiosity.

"I know so, papa!"

"how many peaches do you think we need to check?"

"hmmm," she mumbles, "maybe a million?"

"a million?" your husband dramatically replies, "that's a lot of peaches don't you think,"

"I mean, it's less than a billion..." she responds quite matter of factly.

you catch his gaze from between the door that’s ajar. his expression fully relaxes, and you smile knowingly in his direction at the sight of father and daughter making up.

“papa?” his daughter questions upon his sudden silence, but your husband keeps his focus on you as he hums in acknowledgement before replying, "you're not wrong, but it'll still be quite a challenge to cut through a million peaches..."

"we might need some help," your daughter adds on.

you blow him a secret kiss as to not interrupt further, and quietly close the door before heading back to your bedroom.

[roseykat]

KINKTOBER DAY 5

TITLE: Eat, sleep, play.

PAIRING: Minho x Jisung x reader

SUMMARY: an established poly relationship between you and Minsung, along with an account of what Jisung likes to call ‘play time’. 

WARNING: minors DNI with this post or my blog. I create NSFW SKZ related content and I know I won't be able to regulate/monitor every single potential interaction with these posts so please do not engage with my work and page whatsoever.

TAGS: pre-established poly relationship, bondage, unprotected sex, blowjobs, swearing, oral sex (f!receiving and m!receiving), a dash of bratty yet sub-Jisung, sub reader, ball gags, cum eating.

TAGLIST: @kbitties @luneskies @mal-lunar-28 @kibs-and-bits @aaasia111 @fairy-lixie @dreamingaboutjisung @lizzekat @queenmea604 🩷🩷🩷

-

“I wanna eat her out,” Jisung mutters, unable to take his eyes off of your bound body. It was almost like he was truly hungry, nearly salivating. 

Minho looks down at you but not with a gaze of pity. He just spent the last five minutes binding your body with rope; your legs are bent at your sides as you lie on your back, and your wrists are tied to your ankles. To top it off, Minho had stuffed your mouth with a ball gag. It wasn’t necessarily for punishment, but mainly because he likes being mean.  

“I did have other plans for the both of you, but I guess we can start that after.”

For a moment Jisung wondered what exactly those plans were. It’s always exciting to not know what’s coming next and with Minho, nine times out of ten, it’s something mind blowing. He can adapt to Jisung’s desires and decides to sit cross legged on the bed behind you. So Minho scoots underneath your head so that you’re nearly in his lap. It gives him a better view of Jisung and what he’s about to do to you.

Jisung lies on the bed tummy first, his mouth ready to be put to use in between your legs. The warmth of his breath is a subtle relief followed by the tender kisses he places on each inner thigh, slowly inching down to your clit. Just when he does, your eyes are already fluttering back.

“Mmm!” 

Minho smirks down at you, “can’t say anything now can you?”

Jisung wraps his hands around your upper thighs to bring your pussy closer to his face. The feel of his wet, hot tongue lapping and sucking sends you into a state of oversensitivity. He’s always been good at giving head, same with Minho, so you always count yourself lucky with two partners who are good at what they do. 

His mouth has you moaning like a whore around the ball gag, even though neither of them can audibly hear you as properly. Your legs are already shivering and shaking from the pleasure that’s beginning to surge throughout your body. To top it off, Minho makes his hands useful by rolling your nipples in between his thumbs and fingers. The nervy reaction forces your head back into Minho’s lap, trying to cry out as much as possible. 

“Baby girl likes that doesn’t she?” Minho asks, pinching and tugging at the sensitive buds to make you scream into the gag. 

Your chest starts heaving quicker and quicker, a sign to Minho that you’re about to cum, and just before you do, he has to yank Jisung by his hair to stop him from achieving that. His head lifts up from your pussy, his mouth glistening unashamely with your juices as his eyes looked dazed and spaced out. 

“That’s enough,” Minho warns. “I said you could eat her out, I never said you were allowed to make her cum.” 

Jisungs happens to take a lot of pride in making you orgasm. He thinks it’s the most fascinating yet cute thing at the same time. He enjoys watching you shake, scream, cry, shiver, moan - all of the above when you cum. It’s something he has that really emulates the characteristics of a ‘giver’ even though he himself is, the majority of the time, a ‘receiver’. 

“Don’t be mean to her like that,” he whines. “Wanted to feel her cum.”

“Not yet,” Minho halts. “For now, you’re going to fuck her.” 

Jisung’s eyes light up once more as he props himself up onto his knees while Minho slides out from behind you and takes a seat on the chair next to the bed so he can watch. Having been achingly hard in his pants since the scene began, Jisung starts to feel waves of relief when he’s able to take his dick out. You watch him eagerly with your last line of patience.

“C’mere baby,” he murmurs, almost like he’s tipsy. 

Jisung’s cock is somewhat thick and has the perfect length and curve that it’s enough to make you cum like you’ve never before each and every single time. He gets excited just thinking about it as he rubs the tip of his cock in between your wet folds. Minho crosses one leg over the other as he watches the pair of you, seeing Jisung unintentionally tease your entrance with his cock; only pushing in less than an inch and slowly retracting out. 

It doesn’t matter how much preparation they both put you through, it’s not nearly enough to get you ready for how filling it feels for when Jisung is fully inside of you. 

He squeezes a small dollop of the lube that was pulled out earlier from the bedside table and runs some of the product on his length and some around your pussy. 

The reintroduction of his touch makes you groan, desperate and longing for more that soon comes when he starts to push inside of you. 

“Yes, fuck oh my god,” Jisung mumbles incoherently. “Can never get over this pussy, feels unreal.” 

Heat always rises to your cheeks whenever one of them praises your body. For whatever reason, it gets you to cum quicker. Minho found that out when they were both fucking you once and wouldn’t stop commenting about how gorgeous you looked taking both of them at the same time. Needless to say the mess you made on them was a sign. 

“Fuck, I don’t think I’m going to last,” Jisung starts fucking you shallowly and slowly, not wanting to put in all of his energy into his thrusts in case he cums too early. 

“Lean some more of your weight down to fill her out,” Minho instructs, turning Jisung’s spaced out face into a look of irritation. 

He was just basking in the sensation of wet heat wrapping around him. Despite the context of the scene, Jisung feels very comfortable. He could stay buried inside of you for as long as you’d let him. In saying that, his submissiveness always bends for Minho’s orders. That, fortunately for him, is just how the both of you are built. 

So Jisung listens and leaned further down into your body. Just that subtle adjustment in the position makes you twist from the waist up at how deep Jisung’s cock is now filling you. It brings a sick smile to his face when your moans get louder around the ball gag. The only method of dealing with the pleasure is clenching your fists at your ankles. Even that isn’t enough to manage it. 

“Fuck her like you mean it Jisung,” Minho snaps, growing impatient with how his boyfriend is performing.

Jisung lowers himself down onto both of his elbows, resting more of his weight on top of your body. It allows him to slide in deeper, filling you right out that it squeezes a series of raspy moans from the base of your throat that are muted by the gag. Jisung visibly shudders when he bottoms out, feeling like if he thrusts a few more times, he’ll cum in an instant.

“Can you believe him?” He asks you in your ear, staring at Minho at the same time. “Telling me what to do.”  

His tone and volume were deliberate and provoked a reaction from Minho. He stands up from his seat with  force, walks over to you both with an agitated gait and expression before grabbing a fistful of Jisung’s hair and yanking it back. 

“Do I have to shut you up with a ball gag too?” He questions. 

Jisung grins, thriving in the sting spreading around his scalp, “I wouldn’t be opposed to it.”

Minho’s eye twitches. Out of you and Jisung, Minho would have to say that Jisung can be the brattiest at the worst of times, and you at the best of times. You’ll play up here and there, but Jisung has a tendency to not listen at all until Minho completely subdues him. If Jisung is still talking by the end of a session, Minho hasn’t done enough work to put him in his place. 

“Course you wouldn’t,” Minho releases his hand. “That’s because you’re a fucking slut.”

Jisung’s eyes glaze over, darkening as Minho speaks to him in such a degrading tone. It’s the only method of taming him; degradation and manhandling - the only ways to get Jisung off his high horse. His brain stalls and submits whenever Minho calls him types of names, treats him like a whore, even sometimes when he’s neglected in bed. 

His method of control when it comes to you needs to be an equal balance of degradation, bondage, and physicality - whether that’s pain play, clamps, orgasm torture, maybe a tantalising mixture of all three. 

Over the years that you’ve all been together, he's figured you both out. 

“That’s what you are, isn’t it Jisung?” He asks him. 

“Y-Yes,” he stammers before Minho releases and gives his head a bit of a shove - not too hard, but just enough for a lewd smile to grow on Jisung’s face.  

“Get out of her,” Minho orders. “On your knees.” 

“But-”

“Now,” he says threateningly, cutting his boyfriend's words short. “Wanna keep talking, might as well put that mouth of yours to use.”

Jisung licks his lips and swallows. He gently pulls out of you as you moan at the loss. Minho unbuckles the restraints that have been keeping your legs separate, and your ankles bound to your hands. Even though it feels good to be out of the same position, you miss the heavy feeling of being restrained. The idea of not being able to move itches a part of your brain that you didn’t know existed - especially when you’re being physically and literally bound to cum. 

Even though you’re free now, you still behave obediently and follow through with whatever Minho says. 

“Please fuck me instead,” Jisung mumbles with deep doughy eyes that can make just about anyone fold. 

Not Minho though. Not when he’s in an unshakeable mindset as he manhandles Jisung onto his back on the bed with so much ease, pinning his wrists next to his head, “you’ve already asked for too much tonight. You can just take whatever I decide to give you.”

Jisung pouts. While he wallows in the sadness of the hope to get railed, Minho tends back to you to untie all the rope. When he’s finished, he places it to one side and unlatches the buckle to the ball gag from behind your head. A long line of saliva connects from your lips and the device that was used to keep you from talking. Minho likes seeing it though. A sick and twisted part of him almost makes him want to spit in your mouth. 

“You, on your knees too,” he says to you before you join Jisung on the floor, waiting patiently. 

“W-Why can’t you fuck me?” You ask him.

“Don’t you want to be a good girl for me?” Minho asks you back.

“Yes but-“

“Good girls do what they’re told the first time they’re asked to do something,” he cuts you mid sentence right away. He’s not about to put up with an attitude from you right now. Not when he’s this horny.

Minho sits on the edge of the bed, unzips his pants to reveal his cock already leaking with pre-cum at the tip. Both you and Jisung are keen to get your mouths around your boyfriend's cock, almost salivating when you see it.

“Open,” Minho instructs.

There’s no time either of you waste trying to blow him. You use your mouths as if you were both made for it - made to please him. So you take turns in taking as much of his cock as you both can down your throats. Minho’s hands bunch into fists, gripping the sheets beneath him as his head tips back. Without looking at either of you, the lewd, wet sounds and the hot sensation of your mouths are enough to keep him going. 

Then again, he enjoys watching you work. So he brings his head back up, taking a look at Jisung who’s eagerly waiting for his turn while you use your mouth up and down Minho’s length. He pets under Jisung’s chin and caresses the side of your face at the same time. But when his high approaches fast, he resorts to gripping a fistful of your hair instead.

"So fucking good," Minho grunts through his gritted teeth. Jisung listens to you being praised and scooches closer so that he can try to get his mouth around Minho's cock too.

"Fuck!" He groans. "That's it...making me cum."

In a matter of seconds, Minho doesn't hold back. Both you and Jisung peel off of him as he paints both of your faces with strings of white, warm cum. Minho has always been a 'heavy load' type of guy which is a godsend for people like you and Jisung who don't dare to waste any of it.

As Minho descends from his dizzy, euphoric high, it gives him a bit of time to absorb the mess he's made before him. Jisung uses his thumb to carefully swipe some of Minho's jizz from your lips and gets you to suck it off.

He then gently slides his hand across the underside of your face to the side of your head where he pulls you in to kiss him. That kiss quickly turns into a heated and aggressive makeout where Jisung pins you on your back to the floor. 

“On the floor?” Minho raises a brow, trying not to smile while he catches his breath. 

It only occurs to him now as Jisung is holding you down that you both must be desperate for each other to fuck on the ground. Despite the mess, neither of you cares about it. You can taste Minho on Jisung’s tongue and vice versa. The instigator sitting on the edge of the bed thinks it’s equally as hot, but not a surprise. 

"Fuck me," you whimper when you break free from each other momentarily. "Hurry, please."

"Shh," Jisung hushes with a shaky breath as he aligns the tip of his cock with your entrance once more.

It's not before long until Jisung actually starts fucking you properly this time. Earlier on, he never had the proper chance to after being interrupted by Minho. That's only because his ego interfered. Now he can fuck you as if it's the last thing he's ever going to do.

It's a pleasure for Minho to sit back and enjoy watching you both fuck until you’re shaking around each other. He just loves this - seeing you both rabid with lust that nothing else matters. Minho reckons if anyone were to just walk into the room, that wouldn’t stop you and Jisung from fucking. If anything, he thinks Jisung would probably go harder.

The thought gives him a naughty idea. 

He knows what happens when you’re both needy at the exact same time. It’s always Minho trying to train two untamed animals just going at each other or him. However, Minho will never complain because there is no reason to. He appreciates the level of need you both have for each other, for him as well. That’s what makes the relationship tick, is that love is distributed equally and at high volumes.  

"R-Right there," you mutter, eyelids fluttering as Jisung rocks into you repeatedly. "Cumming...gonna cum."

You bite down into the skin of his shoulder, trying so hard not to scream from the way he’s making you cum. Jisung on the other hand is the opposite - moaning like a slut when he runs face first into an eye-rolling orgasm. 

“Yes, yes! Fuck…making me cum so fucking hard…” Jisung wrestles the words out of his mouth before moans start ripping his throat. 

Neither of you had orgasmed any quicker. If it weren’t for Minho and his deliberate teasing, both you and Jisung would’ve taken longer to cum. Instead, your walls are spasming around Jisung’s cock when it shoots a hot load inside of you.

You’re clinging onto him when he cums, hearing him so vocal always turns you on - same with Minho. It’s a sign that they feel good, and that’s always the hope whenever they stuff you to the hilt.  

"Holy shit," Jisung is panting, almost like he just swam to the surface for air. His hips slow down to a reasonable pace, dragging in and out of you for as long as he can before he pulls out.

From the bed still witnessing all the antics unfold, Minho can't help but watch the way Jisung's cum slowly leaks out of you. It almost makes him wish he was hard enough again to fuck it back into you. But he knows there's probably another time for that.

"You both okay?" Minho asks.

Your hand rests on your head, still splayed on the floor, "mm."

Jisung doesn't answer verbally, but gives a silent nod.

"Okay, I’ll help you both up and we can head to the bathroom so I can clean you up,” Minho adds. “That sound okay? Then afterwards, I’ll order us some food and we can relax for the rest of the evening.”

“Sounds perfect,” Jisung replies.

-

A/N: I swear I'm not useless by not uploading lol as I mentioned in another post, I've been so busy with work that it's just not even funny. I will still power on with Kinktober though! Once again, thank you for supporting my work and being patient with me! xxx

[youredreamingofroo]

LOVE TRAIN INBOUND !! 🚂💨💨

This is inspired by @acuar-io !! Thank you for doing this and THANK YOU FOR THE TAG!! (even tho it didnt tag me properly 🤧)

Tumblr is silly and while I will tag ppl, I know not everyone will be properly tagged, so if u see this, skim thru the list for your name ESPECIALLY if your my mutual ! 🫶

To start off, I just wanna say that Fae (acuar-io) has some absolutely STUNNING sims, it's hard to exactly word it, but their sims are SUPER recognizable, and their saves (Snow flower, Cozy save, etc) are SO nicely edited, so aesthetically pleasing to the eyes 🫶😩

@oshinsimblr is the reason why I started storytelling (even before my simblr time) and why I try and find a story-related reason on why my sims/characters do certain things, her videos are also SO comforting and i love her lovesick series!!! and of course, @minimooberry the whole inspo for this simblr and why I render in blender!

@mattodore and @cinamun are AMAZING simblrs if u want rich storytelling and/or well-thought out characters, River has inspired me to really tear into my characters and give them more personality, and cina just genuinely makes such realistic characters and the tea is ALWAYS hot and simblr aside, she has very good takes >:P

@groovetrys and @circusjuney have been around on my blog and as my mutuals for a LONG time and they really are some of my biggest hype people, lori has an AMAZING legacy going on with her sim, Melody, and u should DEF check it out, and june makes the most amazing clown sims 🥹 theyre always so pretty and STUNNINGGGG

-> To add onto the above category, id also consider @miralure as one of my biggest hype ppl!!! Although they havent been around as long as june and lori, they always hype me up and it makes me stupid happy 😭 they make REALLY good lookbooks and i love their sim style SMMMM

if u dont know about @rebouks what are you DOING with your simblr-life, bc becca has some of the most human-feeling story/dialogue, i always get a stupid sappy smile on my face when i read her story posts

@jarakio has an AMAZING story called Girls with Guns and its prolly my fav story that ive read on simblr, the dialogue? amazing, the poses? amazing, the vibes? AMAZING, i'm ALWAYS hooked in whenever i see GwG pop up on my dash

@stellarfalls just HAD to be on this list are u kidding me????? Bree has a PHENOMENAL save called Valley, even tho there's no dialogue, each image and gif speaks more than words could, she's inspired me to kick up the quality of my posts and also start making gifs, I also consider her to be one of my biggest hype ppl, she always be coming in with the best compliments 🥹🫶

@torissims !!! She makes BEAUTIFUL posts, her blog is very yellow and orange and i LOVE IT, she pulls a lot of inspo from Studio Ghibli and even tho ive never seen any SG Movies, I can just see and feel the inspo, shes def underrated af 🥹

@amburgundy has BEAUTIFUL builds, and they dont just do TS4, they also make builds in other sims games!! (u did a phenomenal job with Madi's legacy house amber 🤝) I LOVE the clutter and they always looks so cozy 😭

@flovoid is another one of my hypemen LMFAOOO bro you and your tags literally make me so happy, i LOVE reading them. Flo makes AMAZING SIMS, and you should check out literally ALL of their sims, especially their sims Roo and Norman from Majima Land (first post under my Roo tag is me reacting to one of their posts with Roo and Norman, funniest introduction to a blog ever), Also their sim, Draco Almond??? He's got me tucking my hair behind my ear... 🫦🫦

@elderwisp has some of the most immaculate editing ive ever seen, the lighting, the vibes, the dialogue, the poses, the expressions, i be eating those posts up like im fine dining 😩😩

@changingplumbob is so chill, I love how much passion she has for her rotations, and her love for cats?? Perfect mutual to have, I also literally LOVE reading her behind the scenes posts, they're literally so funny 😭😭

@tricoufamily and @dejasenti99 make absolutely phenomenal renders, like if theres any renders on simblr that im gonna recognize immediately, its these two's renders, they're genuinely more HQ than my fucking eyes 😭😭

-> Also Nat (Missatan) makes incredibly HQ renders as well, these three are like... my biggest blender render inspos...

@buttertrait @missatan @virtualfolk @pearlean @claudtrait all have BEAUTIFUL sim styles, butter's is very unique, i know they arent really a sims 4 blog anymore but i ALWAYS recognize butter's sims when i see them on my dash and I genuinely love their sim style sm. Nat (Missatan) has SUCH a gorgeous sim style, you've heard of them hips dont lie, well her sims' lips dont lie 😩🫦 Virt (Virtualfolk) and Sam's (pearlean) sim styles are SO animated (if that makes sense), they're like eye-candy. Den (claudtrait), like Nat, has a sim style with the most luscious lips and poutiest faces ive ever seen and are just SOO pleasing to look at, like i just feel blessed in the eyes when i see their sims

@yukikocloud 's Apricot save and storytelling is incredibly reminiscent of Bree's posts, and I just LOVE looking at and reading her story posts, this post in particular just absolutely captivated me, I was drawn in and just get so giddy seeing the Apricot save pop up on my dash 🥹

@alientown @venriliz @nefarrilou @druidberries @machinegrl make STUNNINGGGGG occult (or cyber/robotic in Baja/Machinegrl's instance) sims. Nef always makes beautiful sims for their Cryptid "series", im just in AWE when i see their cryptids... Ven and Ana (alientown) both always make absolutely gorgeous alien sims and they also just have very unique/beautiful sim styles 😍 Baja's cyber girlies are just >>>>>>>>>>>>> I love her whole dystopian/cyber theme, its literally so good and so cool, and her Deadstars series? SO good. Alexis' (druidberries) elowen is so pretty, and her sim style, especially with occults, is just MWAH chefs kiss, literal eye candy

@swallowprettybird is just one of the sweetest people on simblr, I love reading what she has to say about mine and others' posts, and she makes amazingggg posts, I loved that one national geographic inspired post with the zebra, it was so well done

@softle0 makes some absolutely stunning builds, they always look so lived in, so cozy and I would ABSOLUTELY live in pretty much every single build they make

and honorable mentions to @droolski @felysline @pamsimmerstories @swiftviolets @weirdosalike @mushbop @calicosimgirl @shadowtrait and @seriallovertrait because I feel like they're all SO underrated, they're all passionate about their own stuff and I just love seeing their posts, and if you're seeing this, FOLLOW THEM 🫵🫵

Thank you Fae (acuar-io) once again for starting this train up, I love seeing stuff like this and it's so sweet to see what everyone has to say about one another, I may have spent 1 or 2 hours doing this, but it was INCREDIBLY well spent to be able to admire and appreciate all these people, them and every other simblr person, whether i follow them or not, deserve every last drop of love and appreciation genuinely

[mylovelies-docx]

Sorry, I Love You - Part 12

I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo sorry for this.

Plot: You and Bucky have a good thing going - best of friends that also have more than a little chemistry between the sheets. Everything is fine until you develop feelings for the man who doesn't want a relationship. What will happen when Bucky finds out?

C/W: Angst (!!!), murder, blood, guns, violence, death.

(I PROMISE EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY! You've just gotta trust me.)

Word Count: 2,724

Tag List: NOW CLOSED! If you'd like to keep up with this story, please follow my blog and turn on notifications! ❤️ you :)

He can’t take the silence any longer. You should have been home hours ago.

All his texts go unanswered and his calls go straight to voicemail. You’ve had late nights at the HYDRA base, but never this late – never an early morning kind of late.

He knows you’re capable. Knows that you’re one of the strongest people, the best agent, the best everything, but something doesn’t feel right. He can’t feel you. He knows that’s stupid – that he isn’t psychic or empathic or whatever he’d need to be to feel someone’s presence when they’re not in the room with him, but he’s always felt you. 

He can feel you down in his bones, his body unable to forget your voice, your laugh, your smell, your body beside, on, under his own. There’s no one in this universe that he knows better, that knows him better, than anyone else. 

Used to know. Until he fucked it up. Until he fucked everything up and drove you away. Drove you so far away that you weren’t even on the same continent for months, that you never picked up the phone and called him, that you didn’t send any silly texts at 2 am like you used to. He was too embarrassed and ashamed of his reaction to contact you first. He thought it’d be too impersonal to apologize over the phone and admit how scared he was when you confessed to loving him and how sorry he is for what he did afterwards.

That’s why he sent Steve and Sam to bring you home: so that he could see you again and explain himself to you and hopefully confess that, yes of course he loves you too. He was so nervous as he watched the quinjet approach, worried that you wouldn’t like his outfit, or the stubble on his jaw, or his new haircut that he got for you because he remembered how often you’d run your fingers through it and comment on how hot you thought shorter hair would look on him.

But then he cornered you in that hallway. Felt his heart break as you told him that you got over him, that you didn’t love him anymore and never did in any meaningful way. You assured him that you could be friends again if that’s what he wanted.

Of course that’s what he wanted. Of course he wanted to be friends. But he also wanted everything else – what you had before that night at the movies and what you could have had after. He wanted the date nights, and forehead kisses, and hand holding. He wanted the quick fucks, and makeout sessions, and love-making. He wanted all of it with you.

He still does. 

But you don’t.

He will forever regret the words he said to you that drove you away and dissolved the love that you felt for him. He will never forgive himself for taking away your future together. And after that disastrous conversation with you about Petre, he feels like he’s gone right back to square one. He doesn’t know what to do with his emotions and can’t express himself properly to save his life.

He knows what you said, knows the meaning behind the individual words you spoke to him last night: that you and Petre are not together in any way. But Bucky knows that isn’t what Petre wants – knows that Petre wants you in a way that Bucky used to have you, that Bucky could have had you, and more. Because Bucky sees the way that Petre looks at you, the way his eyes follow you around the room as you say hello and chat with his family when they’re around.

Knows that Petre has already asked his mother if she knew of anything else about you before he moved forward with a proposal, if there was somewhere specific he should do it, what else to bring besides his grandmother’s ring. Petre had been across the room with Tessa during this conversation, but Bucky’s serum-enhanced hearing picked it up and he knew that Petre was head-over-heels for you because how could he not be?

He’ll also never forgive himself if something happened to you at HYDRA. Your argument from last night has been lingering between the two of you, and he doesn’t know what to do to fix it – it’s just the actual process and action of initiating that conversation and exposing his squishy insides to you that causes his brain to shut down and his mouth to spew out stupid shit. He knows that you would never turn him away for being vulnerable, but just the way he’s acted when feelings have come up… it leaves a sour taste in his mouth and he’s sure it’s left one in yours as well. 

But you were supposed to call him at lunchtime and he would have said everything he’s been bottling up right then and there. Would have blurted it out because god damn him and his stupid mouth because every time he’s tried to bring it up, he’s fucked up and he hurt you. He doesn’t want to – can’t do that to you again. If you had just called when you said you would, it would have all been cleared up by now and you’d be home and hopefully in his arms and, and, and.

But you didn’t call. You’re not home. Bucky hasn’t apologized.

He’s already called Steve and requested backup – he’d rather be safe than sorry. Now all he’s waiting on is –

His phone that he’d left faceup on the countertop before him beeps and the screen flashes with a notification. Tony finally sent the link to track your location, letting him know where you’re at. Before his heart can even beat again, another message scrolls across the top of his screen.

That’s all Bucky needs before he races out the door, not even bothering to grab a coat before the door slams behind him. Tony’s second message burns behind Bucky’s eyes and makes it hard to think.

Hurry. Something’s not right…

***

The ATV Bucky ‘borrowed’ off one of the neighbors is perfectly capable of getting someone where they’re going, but Bucky grew frustrated with the speed as soon as he raced away with it. He’d have been happier on his souped-up motorcycle, roaring down the roads and sending gravel flying, but it’d be impractical on the freshly fallen snow and hilly terrain. 

His heart stutters in his chest every time he looks down at your tracker’s location and doesn't see it moving. There’s no way you’d be sitting idly in one spot deep in the forest, nearly 20 miles away from the HYDRA base and the house you’ve been sharing with Bucky. The home the two of you have made since arriving.

He thinks of how the two of you should be at the house now - fast asleep, maybe in the same bed if he’d found the right words to tell you what’s been going on in his head, why he was being such a asshole yesterday and how he never should have said any of the shit he did – or at least phrased it better, correctly. 

Every time Bucky remembers your fight last night, he feels the air leave his lungs and a fist form in his throat. The way your face had crumpled when he said you could be together again but then immediately shifted into a flat stare, no emotion evident when you told him that he was the reason that could never happen. Your broken voice when he tried to approach you again when he followed you home. The wrenching, muffled sobs he could hear you trying to smother across the hall as he laid there wide awake, his own tears soaking the pillow.

If Bucky could turn back time, he never would have asked you to be friends-with-benefits. His emotions were all over the place and he was still relishing his freedom, his autonomy that had been returned to him. He didn’t think he wanted any kind of committed relationship back then because he thought it would suffocate him, make him feel like he wasn’t his own person anymore, that there was someone that he had to answer to again.

He should have known that you wouldn’t have made him feel that way – that you are the exception to every rule and that you always helped build him up, never once did anything that made him feel suffocated or out of control. He’d been the one to initiate your friendship, he’d been the one that sought you out for no-strings-attached sex. You’d only ever been there for him, followed him when he needed to get away from the others, listened when he needed to talk to someone. Loved him when he didn’t want to be loved.

And what did he do with that love? He threw it away, crushed it under the sole of his boot in that alley way, let you walk away from his life when you should have worked it out together.

When he’d finally gotten his head out of his ass and realized that all the late nights, deep conversations, the comfort and warmth he felt in your presence: that was love. He didn’t recognize it at the time, but he knew that you were important to him, that you were the only one he could spend so much time with and not become overwhelmed. It took you leaving for him to realize everything that you did for him, all the support you offered. 

He spent a lot of time with his therapist after that. He used to be so angry at you and he knew it was unfair, that it wasn’t logical to be so mad at someone for falling in love, but he was. His therapist listened to his deepest, darkest, most wretched feelings about you, about himself. They helped him to realize that he wasn’t mad at you, that he was only frightened of the love you had for him and the feelings that brought up in him. He didn’t realize he found himself so unlovable and broken that he didn’t think anyone could love him like that. Could love him like you do. 

Did. Love him like you did until he ruined that love like he always knew he would, deep down. It took a lot of time and effort, but he finally understands what he feels for you. 

But now it might be too late.

Bucky is only a mile out from your location when he hears the barking of dogs and men yelling to each other. He pushes the ATV faster, dodging between trees and ducking under branches. Seconds later, Bucky sees lights bouncing off of a decrepit shack and agents wearing HYDRA uniforms scrambling around. 

He takes one hand off the handle and pulls his pistol from the waistband of his pants. He clears the treeline and jumps from the vehicle, ducking and rolling onto the ground. The ATV flies forward and knocks down one of the agents. They all turn to investigate the commotion, and Bucky starts firing.

He shoots one, two, three people off of their feet and they collapse onto the ground in pools of blood. Realizing at this point that Bucky is a threat, the others around the cabin pull their weapons out and aim for Bucky. He clears the next six with one shot each, leaving only two standing and no bullets left in his magazine. Bucky launches the empty pistol straight into one of the assailant’s temples, sending him sprawling. At the same second the pistol leaves his hand, Bucky sprints at the remaining HYDRA agent and slams his metal fist into their face, blood and bone splattering.

Grabbing the gun from this last agent, Bucky grips it in his fist and enters the building. Pivoting side to side, there’s no one immediately in his line of sight. He can see blood spatters around the room, in front of the bookshelf and desk, and a pool of it right in front of him in the archway between rooms. Bucky can hear someone just on the other side of the wall and he adjusts his hands around the gun, finger hovering over the trigger. 

Quickly rounding the open archway, Bucky finds his worst nightmare.

He sees you lying motionless on the ground, your warm, red blood steaming as it puddles around your body. A HYDRA operative stands over you, gun poised and ready. 

Without another thought, Bucky unloads the weapon. He riddles the final agent with bullet holes, ensuring that their finger will never pull the trigger on you. He doesn’t watch as they fall, instead running towards you with only one thought in his head: Please. Please be alive.

Bucky reaches your body where you lie on your side, facing away from him. He quickly rolls you onto your back and watches as your head lolls from the motion. 

“Y/N,” he calls hoarsely, placing his hands on your cheeks and patting quickly. “Y/N. Doll, wake up.” 

Your eyes remain closed and you don’t move. Heart in his throat, Bucky places his fingers on your neck.

Nothing.

“Oh god,” Bucky whines.

Nausea roils in his stomach as Bucky places his hands one over the other on your chest, fingers interlocked. He begins compressions, forcing your heart to circulate what little blood remains in your veins. He feels your ribcage creak and groan under the pressure, knowing he will break bones but hoping the effort will revive you.

Twenty-eight, twenty-nine, thirty. 

Bucky removes his hands from your chest and uses them to tilt your head backwards, opening up your airway. He clamps your nose shut and presses his lips over yours, forcing two breaths into your lungs. He returns immediately to chest compressions, counting up to thirty again and repeating the process.

“Come on, doll. Come back to me.”

It feels like hours that Bucky crouches over your body, working hard to manually pump your heart and keep your brain oxygenated. He doesn’t know how long you’ve been without a pulse, but he’ll do anything to give you a chance at survival.

A loud whirring sound comes from outside and Bucky can hear boots hit the ground. He panics for a second, wondering how he’s going to keep you safe while also keeping you alive, until he hears Steve’s voice.

“Buck? Y/N?!”

“In here!” Bucky yells frantically.

Multiple people come barreling into the kitchen where Bucky is administering CPR. Shock and dread wash over everyone’s faces at the sight in front of them, but Bucky doesn’t have time for them to stand around. You don’t have time.

“Help her!” he cries, lungs and muscles burning. “Please!”

Natasha tries to rush forward, but her booted leg slows her down. Steve and Sam collapse on either side of your body, Sam pushing Bucky out of the way to start his own compressions. Bucky thunks to the ground, his body exhausted from the fear and effort of the last little while.

Wanda runs in, using her powers to suspend the regeneration cradle in the air and bring it over to you. Tony and Nat help Steve and Sam lift you up off the ground and into the machine as Bucky watches your cooling blood drip, drip, drip from your body.

Wanda’s face is wet with tears as she picks the cradle back up with you inside. Using a pulse from his palm, Tony blows a hole in the kitchen wall. Scraps of paper fly off the table and land near Bucky. Wanda takes you directly outside and into the waiting quinjet, Nat and Tony running alongside her. 

A blast of cold air from the open wall slams into Bucky and chills him to his core. He looks down at himself and finds his hands and legs covered in blood. Your blood. One of the pieces of paper catches his eye as it turns red where it lays on the floor. He scoops it up gently and tries to make out what is written.

Bucky can tell instantly that it is your handwriting, but it’s nearly illegible now. He can barely make anything out, and what he can rips his heart to shreds. A wet hiccup tears out of Bucky’s throat and his hands start to quake uncontrollably as he stares at your words.

In case these are my last words,

Don’t be sad. I wish that I could  have spent the rest of my life with you. I just want you all to know that I love you. so , so much. 

“I’m too late,” he whispers. “She’s… she’s…”

Steve and Sam grab either of Bucky’s arms and drag him to his feet. 

“We’ve gotta go, pal,” Steve says. “We’ve gotta get her to Helen!” Nodding his head, Bucky allows his friends to lead him outside and onto the jet. 

He watches you lying in the cradle, not moving, the entire way home.

Part 13

Tag list: @jackiehollanderr @rabbitrabbit12321 @12345sebby @blackwood-bodecker-housewife @lauraashley93 @themorningsunshine @happinessinthebeing @nash-dara @calwitch @stany0url0calwh0res111 @pono-pura-vida @learisa @introverbatim @kentokaze @marvelogic @kaz11283 @terry2227

[nburkhardt]

59. “H-How long have you been standing there?”

ILY 😘

ILY 🥰 sorry it went a little angsty

~

“Maybe being here isn’t the best idea but I can’t handle not knowing, okay? And- and I need to know, even though we, we aren’t friends and I just needed to be here. To know if you’re good and when, when you tell me to leave- I’ll go, I swear” Steve is pacing and rambling, not making any sense but it’s okay sort of.

He’s the only one in here right now, besides well, Eddie. Who can’t respond because he’s not awake, and that’s why Steve’s even talking out loud and pacing like a worried partner. And truthfully he is worried, he’s just not Eddie’s partner.

Not even Eddie’s friend.

Letting out a sound that’s definitely a sob, he continues to pace and shake his head. Wrapping his arms around himself, “you just, you can’t die, Eddie. You’d be making Henderson sad and I can’t handle that and, and i- we need you, man. Gotta have another adult around. I, I’d like to get to know you to need you.”

He whispers the last part out, wanting it to be a secret even if Eddie is clearly out cold from the medication the doctors have him on and probably will never hear this.

There’s movement from the door and Steve spins around to freeze in his spot, coloring draining from his face.

“H-how long have you been standing there?” He chokes out and wonders if he was being too loud again, he can’t tell what his volume is sometimes. Hopes he wasn’t just yelling his thoughts out.

Wayne Munson steps further into the room and he pats Steve’s shoulder as he moves to sit next to the bed, “Long enough to wonder if I should get ya something to relax, sit down”

Automatically, he finds the other chair and sit down with his back straight. Avoiding looking at Wayne, focusing his gaze at Eddie’s hand.

He hears Wayne sigh, “Boy, just hold it. Here, press your fingers right at his pulse point,” he follows it and slowly grabs hold of Eddie’s hand, pressing his fingers along to feel, to know, that Eddie’s heart is beating.

“How, um, how much did you hear?” Steve asks, gaze still locked on Eddie’s hand and now his, moving it to properly hold Eddie’s. “Was I loud?”

“Enough to know you care about my boy, ain’t loud either.”

Steve nods, taking a moment to breathe before looking up at Wayne, “I’m sorry, Mr. Munson, if he- I shouldn’t-” he drops Eddie’s hand and stands up to leave, he should leave.

“Boy, Steve, sit down” Wayne’s voice is rough and he’s shaking his head, sighing, “Ed will be fine, and he’d be throwing a fit if you just left”

“What? How” Steve’s eyes widen and look at him, “we aren’t- he doesn’t, why”

“I know my nephew and who he wants around, you might not know much about each other,” Wayne looks at Eddie a twitch of a grin on his face, “might’ve even just met, but once he knows you, he wants you around. Especially if that person helps save his life”

Steve drops back down and leans his head against the bed, his tension falling as he does, “I’d like to stay, I’d, I’d like to know him”

The room grows quiet, only the beeps from the machines is heard.

Steve shifts, getting more comfortable with his arms crossed on the bed and his head on top to look at Eddie. Wayne nods with a smile, despite Steve not looking at him, leans back in his chair to get comfortable.

In the morning, they’ll talk more. They’ll get coffee and spend the day waiting for Eddie to wake up.

~

This wrote itself, it actually wanted to go on longer butttt I don’t wanna. I WILL say this is after vecna and Steve definitely carried Eddie to the hospital and refused to leave his side. The only reason Dustin’s not there is because his mom has him under house arrest to let his ankle to heal ✌️

Tag list under the cut:

@spectrum-spectre @itsfreakingbats @mysticcrownshipper @artiststarme @thereindeerlady @justforthedead89 @ronniescontinuum @freyaforestafay @littlewildflowerkitten @gregre369 @zerokrox-blog @flustratedcas @carlprocastinator1000 @marvelmwah @solliesolesito @navnae @i-less-than-three-you @grimmfitzz @estrellami-1

[zgvlt]

tried and tested and truly yours sebek zigvolt x reader

summary: Sebek, the bodyguard of famous celebrity Malleus Draconia, is a regular at your café. With his frequency in your establishment, conversation was inevitable, though he never would have expected you to become anything beyond a late night acquaintance.

tags: gender neutral reader, sfw, fluff/romance, aged up characters (since they're all working), no magic AU, 12k+ words, not beta read

author's note (see end for more): (Belated) HAPPY BIRTHDAY SEBEK and (Belated) Happy Anniversary, TWST JP! Since my first fic was also on Sebek's birthday last year, Happy 1 year anniversary to my blog! Yippee!

you can also read this on AO3

“Hello! You’re here again.” Sebek looked up from the menu to stare at you, not unkindly but in a not exactly friendly way either. “Dear regular. What will you be having tonight?”

You recognized him as the man who frequented your café at odd hours—always your first customer in the morning, loudly declaring the same order and quick to leave; always your last customer in the evening, quietly eating until he was forced to leave. He recognized you as the owner of the establishment—he had thought you to be the manager once with how present you were, but the way you dressed freely and lacked a name tag suggested otherwise.

“I’ll have honey lemon tea,” he replied easily, heeding the recommendation his two bosses gave him. It would be good to keep his voice loud and healthy, they said, and who was he to not follow such a well-meaning, wise suggestion? “Hot, please.”

“Alright,” you replied, scribbling something on your notepad quickly, “and for something to bite… The usual, sir?”

Sebek nodded, “Whatever went unsold, I’ll get it all.”

You smiled brightly. He remembered you used to be visibly shocked the first few times he dined in, even concerned for his wallet with how much he ordered. He had huffed at the time, proclaiming that he was very well compensated by his very well-off employers, and that there was no use in worrying about him or his appetite. Nowadays, though, with the growing popularity of your business, you seemed more concerned about whether you had enough to feed him with.

“It’s really nice that you eat well,” you said, “does it have something to do with your job? You know, like people who compete in bodybuilding have to eat a certain amount and eat certain things to develop their body a certain way when they work out.”

“You’ve never asked me about my profession before,” Sebek noted. Many people would have stopped at that and you did look like you were about to apologize for prying, but he was, honestly, extremely proud of his job, so he found himself talking about it anyway. “But yes. Eating a certain amount is a part of my training regimen! How can I protect Sir Malleus properly if I can’t utilize my body efficiently?”

You blinked. “I’m sorry, protect who?”

Sebek’s first instinct is to groan to himself—that was a slip of the tongue, he should have been more careful with his words…! What if you’re some delusional fan who’s going to pester him about Malleus Draconia?! What if you’re an anti who’s going to try to use him to get close to the man and try to harm him?!

“Malleus… I feel like I’ve heard that name before. Is he a model or something?”

The second instinct he has is to immediately educate you, because unless you’re extremely good at pretending—he has to keep his guard up before he can clear that doubt about you—you seem to not know who Malleus Draconia is, which is an act malum in se… A crime in and of itself.

“How do you not know the greatest performer of the century? The Malleus Draconia!” Sebek exclaimed, shaking his head. Simultaneously, he brought out his wallet—but not to pay for his orders yet. Rather, snuck in a slot right in between his credit card and debit card, he pulled out a photo card, one of the man being brought up. “This is Malleus Draconia. He was a talented stage actor in his childhood, then he became a soloist in his teenage years, before returning back to acting, this time in movies and series, in his adulthood. He also models, yes, in commercials and magazines, but it is not his main profession. 

“Surely you must have seen him somewhere? Perhaps you simply did not know his name but your eyes have been graced with his performances!”

“Um, I hate to break it to you… I don’t think I know any of his songs, or watched anything he’s in,” you admitted, though upon locking eyes with him for a few seconds you ended up adding, “I’m sure he’s very talented, though! I mean, he certainly looks the part of someone popular. I’ll, err, do my research once I get home? If I don’t pass out in bed immediately,”

“That’s WONDERFUL! Of course, if you are truly as new to him as you say you are, you will have much to catch up on,” Sebek sighed, as though pitying you slightly, “but it will certainly be worth it. If you’re quick to invest enough, I won’t be surprised if you begin begging me for tickets to his concerts or fanmeets, or if you try to bribe me to get his signature. I won’t do it, mind you! So I’m warning you now!”

It was a very genuine warning, but something about the look on your face perturbed him. Could it be that you had plans to do so?

“So during these fanmeets and all these other events… You’ll be in attendance?” you asked, and Sebek scoffed at the question. Was it not obvious?

“I’m one of his bodyguards,” Sebek proclaimed with pride, “I am always in attendance, not only in the case of an emergency, but to support him as well!”

“I feel like you’re about to tell me something along the lines of ‘If Malleus Draconia has 1 million fans, I am one of them. If he has 1,000, I am one of them. If he has one, that is me. If he has none, I’ve departed from this world,’ or however the saying goes,” you laughed, and Sebek had almost begun an argument about how Malleus had more than one million fans, thank you very much! His MagiCam followers were only surpassed by the likes of Vil Schoenheit and Neige LeBlanche, who were active on social media, so it wasn’t a fair comparison! 

“I think it’s nice that a serious guy like you has this kind of passion, even if I wouldn’t have been able to guess it,” you said, “everyone must feel really reassured that they could rely on someone dedicated like you to protect such a high-profile celebrity.”

“Hmph! Of course they are!” Sebek was practically preening at your compliments, readily accepting them. “It’s good that even you, who hardly knows anything about Malleus Draconia, can recognize that!”

“Feel free to tip me for that if you want,” you said, “that was a joke by the way, I was being genuine.”

“I know it was a joke.” Sebek did not know, actually. He was fully prepared to tip you more than usual for engaging in this type of conversation with him. Somehow, he found himself more rejuvenated than usual, even though he had quite the tiring workday. Hopefully the tea would do the trick and, if not, he supposed some late night lifting back in his apartment would get him sleepy!

“Alright,” you smiled, as though you didn’t believe him. “I’ll go prepare your order, Sebek.”

“I’m surprised you remember my name,” he admitted, “you always call me your regular or something else instead.”

“Sebek, you’ve spelled out your name for me so many times for your coffee,” you reminded him, “S-E-B-E-K. I’m sure anyone would remember a name yelled out at five in the morning, practically every day.”

“Right,” Sebek turned away from you, flushing slightly in embarrassment. Of course that made sense. He was a frequent customer. If not you, then one of your employees would write his name down on a coffee cup. Sebek was not a particularly common name, too, so obviously you would recall.

“Since you know my name, though, I should know yours as well.”

You never wore a name tag, after all, so all this time he’s been calling you the person who owns the café in the building of my work place, which was a mouthful and just, honestly, plain neglectful of him. How rude of him! He should correct his impoliteness, shouldn’t he? It was simply right and, well, he should work on doing right so as to not bring any blights to his employer!

“Is that so?”

You didn’t answer him initially, focused on preparing his orders and, right after, charging his card for the bill. However, when he gets his receipt, he finds it jotted in pencil at the back, alongside your MagiCam handle and phone number—for emergencies it says, right beside an asterisk, or if he needed something delivered to his workplace.

Sebek doesn’t do social media, nor is he particularly social anywhere, mostly using his phone for work, to keep up with anything to do with Malleus, or to catch up with his family, but he keeps the receipt tucked in his wallet instead of throwing it out immediately. 

For emergencies, of course, though it’s not so much for him but more so for you. Not having any security guards in your café this close to midnight? Sure, the city was relatively safe, but there were dangerous people everywhere. Though he was not employed to protect you, he still frequented your café, so he found it important to make sure you were safe. It would be troublesome if something were to happen to you or your business.

That was all there was to it so, despite the regulations he had, self-imposed or otherwise, he found himself not just saving your number, but replying back, warning you to not spread his contact details anywhere.

Aside from a promise to do so, you text him something you’ve already told him a while ago: Good night!

Perhaps he should have reminded you to only text him for important matters, but maybe it was a good thing that he didn’t. He did not reply, but he made sure to greet you a good morning in person the next day.

Sebek’s eyes have constantly been flickering between Malleus Draconia and the crowd coming to see him this whole time, that being for about an hour now, and as much as he enjoys seeing people recognize the celebrity’s talents and efforts to the point that they would line up for hours to see him, the whole affair is, for once, relatively uneventful. 

He’s grateful, of course, that there’s no one to have to restrain for once; even his boss seems genuinely relieved that the event thus far had been very peaceful, what with him flashing a rare grin (with teeth!) instead of his usual closed-lipped smirks and smiles. 

What a blessed day to be a supporter of Malleus Draconia. 

That was why, although he still tried to keep vigilant, he found himself relaxing slightly, just soaking up the good atmosphere.

Then you showed up. You were still wearing the clothes he usually saw you wearing in the café, but the hat you had on your head really made it difficult to distinguish you from the crowd until you eventually removed it, right when you were already in front of Malleus.

Why didn’t you tell him you were going to attend?! You never even showed any interest in attending when he told you there was going to be a fanmeet today!

Then, you placed a paper bag on top of the desk. The contents had to be food, Sebek was sure, because while you did your best to cover up where the food had come from by using something plain as opposed to branded packaging, there was no hiding the familiar smell of pastries within.

Really, it showed that you were awfully new to events like these. Though the rules differed from celebrity to celebrity, Malleus specifically was not allowed to accept foods that were not, at the very least, sealed and packaged. For safety reasons, unfortunately, but a measure that had to be done.

Still, because you, from what he knew of you, were a well-intentioned person, he didn’t want to embarrass you in front of anyone. He was already making his way to grab the paper bag himself, as well as give you a reminder for the future, when you decide to tell Malleus something, muttering low enough so as to not be heard by anyone else.

“Nice to meet you, Malleus,” you said, shaking the hand in front of you, “Sorry if this is impolite, but could you give this to Sebek?”

Sebek nearly screamed. He really was about to, but he just about managed to hold back, merely jolting in place. His fellow guard slash his other boss’ assistant slash adoptive son, Silver, stared at him pointedly. 

“You know one of my bodyguards?” the black-haired man asked. While Sebek could not see his expression from his vantage point, he did sound intrigued by you. “Are you Sebek’s…?”

“He didn’t come by my café this morning,” you said, finally glancing towards him. “I was concerned he hadn’t eaten anything yet.”

“Oh I wouldn’t worry about him. He had a hefty breakfast, I promise,” Malleus laughed, “though I’ll make sure to give this to him anyway, since you worked so hard to bring it here.” 

“Thank you, I really appreciate it. Sebek was right about you being nice. I’ll try to support you in the future,” you promised, “I’ll be going now. I don’t want to take away any more time than I have from your fans.”

“Alright, take care,” Malleus said, and Sebek watched you walk away with a smile, wondering to himself who exactly it was meant for considering the difference between who you were talking to versus who you were looking at. 

Malleus spun around to hand the bag to him, eyes gleaming. 

“Well, you might as well prepare yourself. Lilia is going to pester you about this later,” he laughed ominously, promptly turning back to the crowd to greet his next fan before Sebek could get a response out.

“You must have lined up for about an hour just to get to the front,” Sebek said, confronting you as soon as he got back to his hotel room. Through the phone, he heard you let out a hum of agreement. Sebek sighed right after. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“I was expecting you! You said you’d be able to go get your morning coffee,” you retorted, “well, ‘coffee’, quote-unquote, it’s more like milk with a dash of coffee… But seriously, isn’t it normal to get worried, especially because of the type of job you have?”

Sebek glanced at the mirror, the visual representation of his heated face reflected right back at him. 

“Something came up. We had to leave earlier than usual, so I couldn’t stop by,” he explained apologetically… and blatantly ignoring the comment about his tastes in caffeine. “You could have messaged me.”

“You don’t check your phone during work hours,” you reminded him, “unless it’s work related.”

“How sure are you that I would not have checked?!” Sebek asked, rolling his eyes despite the fact that you would not be able to see it. “Seriously…! I got a severe questioning from my boss because of you!”

“Oops, sorry!” you apologized, not sounding all that sorry. “What did Malleus ask you? I can’t imagine him as the type to grill you all that much.”

“Not much, thankfully, since, AHEM!” He cleared the non-existent phlegm in his throat, using that time to think of some other response other than the truth. “He mostly did the listening, not the questioning. Our chairman did.”

He inevitably went with the truth.

“Damn… your chairman?” you laughed, though it seemed more sympathetic this time, “You didn’t get in trouble, did you? I know some people are particularly strict with, you know, how they operate during work hours, who they associate with, not allowing people in your personal life to interact with people in your profession, things like that.”

“No! No, he’s terrifying sometimes, but he’s extremely compassionate too!” Sebek said, defending the man, “Although the questions… I would have preferred not to answer them at all…”

The recollection of the earlier event, the awkwardness and embarrassment he felt as he was questioned about you of all people, everything about it made him groan in annoyance. It felt like no matter what he answered, he found himself digging into a deeper and deeper hole that he couldn’t get away from.

“Okay, I won’t pry about the questions since you seem so pained by the memory,” you assured him, “even if I’m curious, so… Let’s talk about something else, then, if you’re not busy.”

“I’m not busy,” Sebek said quickly, even though he was rather tired from everything today. It was just… talking to you, yes, so it wasn’t like he would be exerting that much effort by staying up a few minutes later! The only difference between talking to you back at the café and talking to you on the phone was distance, obviously.

Never mind that, at the time, he was there as a customer and right now, well, there was no real reason for him to speak to you without the proximity binding you two to converse. 

“Are you sure? You sound a little tired.”

“Me? Tired? Do you still not know me well enough to be able to suggest such a thing? The events of today are not enough to make use of all of my strength, mind you!” he huffed, incredulous at the suggestion. “Even if I were to stay up for three consecutive nights, I would be able to do it!”

“Would not recommend that, even if it’s for work.” He imagined you shaking your head at him in some form of disapproval. “How was the coffee, by the way? I hope it was still warm by the time it got into your hands.”

“It was actually, yes.” His eyes darted onto the coffee table, the mint green tumbler sitting there, emptied and washed. “The insulation was good and it kept the drink sufficiently warm. I must ask where you bought it! I should replace my current water bottle with something similar.”

“Ahh… Just keep it, then,” you told him, hastily adding, “I haven’t used it yet, by the way! So you don’t have to worry about, like, my germs or something.”

“I can’t possibly…” Sebek said, trailing off as he listened to your protests. “Fine! Let me pay for it, then.”

“Sebek, no.” He tried to imagine what type of expression you would have on your face by now as you tried to argue with him. There were some complaints and banter, yes, but insistence regarding something so simple was new in regards to you. “Just consider it as a thank you for being my regular.”

“Absolutely not, then. Goods and services are meant to be paid for, and I’ve paid for them appropriately. It’s not like you’re handing them out to me for free. If anything, shouldn’t I pay you extra for doing a delivery run even when you did not have to go that far?”

For a moment you did not say anything, and Sebek thought he had finally won against you. Then, as though to let him know your silence was simply spent thinking of the perfect response, you replied,

“Then it’s a gift,” you told him, “because you’re my friend.”

“FRIEND?!” Sebek blurted out, before clearing his throat the second time that night. “Ah! Well, yes, of COURSE. This is normal behavior for friends to exhibit, yes. The exchange of gifts. Tokens of friendship.”

“Yeah? I mean, not everyone really needs to exchange. Sometimes, just receiving or just giving is enough,” you pointed out, “but you know, it feels nice to let your friends know you appreciate them any way you can, and that you’re appreciated, too.”

“Of course,” Sebek nodded to himself. Payment wasn’t what you wanted. What you needed in return was something… heartfelt and genuine. It was like one of his favorite Malleus Draconia movies, where he, to show his appreciation, gifted his dear ally something practical, something special, something he knew they would enjoy. It was such a good movie he had teared up, and what kind of fan would he be if he were not to heed the morals of the media he consumed? “I’ll keep that in mind.”

“That’s oddly intimidating, but alright,” you replied, yawning midway, “Alright, it’s getting late, and if not you, then I should go get some rest, so… See you tomorrow?”

“I won’t be there in the morning,” he let you know, “but I’ll see you in the evening.”

“Okay.” He imagined your smile, the one you usually gave him when he entered and left your café. He imagined you were smiling before you hung, and when you hung up it was only then that Sebek realized the call had gone longer than he had thought, and that he was still dressed in his suit.

It was thereafter he remembered that his room was right beside Malleus’, who tended to stay up late with Lilia, who often had Silver by his side, and thus…

Someone knocked on his door, a familiar beat of a song from his hometown. When he opened it up, he was only slightly surprised to be face to face with his fellow bodyguard, somehow awake at this hour. 

“Sebek, try to lower your volume next time,” the light-haired boy sighed, “father told me to let you know he and Malleus could hear your lover’s quarrel from the next room.”

He felt the red seep back into his face, though he wondered if it had ever really left in the first place.

“I’ll go over and apologize… even if it’s not a lover’s quarrel!” he boomed, before shutting the door behind him. Next to him, Silver shrugged.

“Okay, maybe we just misheard.”

“And misunderstood, too,” Sebek added. They walked a few steps in the hallway, walking away from room 1703 stopping right in front of 1704, Malleus’ room. Before Silver could use the keycard, Sebek halted the action. “Wait. Answer me this before we enter.”

“Sure?” Silver asked, confused by how sudden it was brought upon him. “If I can, I’ll try.”

“Silver… What kind of gifts do friends usually give each other?”

“SIR! What are you doing here?!” 

At his exclamation, Malleus Draconia looked away from his conversation partner, you, to acknowledge his presence. Beside him, you smile and wave at him, as though beckoning him to come closer. He could not compel himself to do so, choosing to stand right next to the door.

“Am I not allowed to be here, Sebek?” 

He froze, panicked and unsure of how to respond. Who was he to dictate where the man was allowed to go, especially a place not just harmless, but a place he was fond and familiar with? If anything, his pre-existing preoccupation with the establishment should have assured him that nothing terrible would happen to his employer.

Beyond safety, the person who ran the business itself was one he approved of beyond measure, thus… 

“There’s no reason you shouldn’t be, sir!” he replied hastily, gaze avoidant of your own, focused on the tall man. “I was just shocked to see you here so late, and without Sir Lilia or Silver by your side!”

“Even before you and Silver were enlisted as my guards, I’ve been accustomed to taking walks at this hour. You’re not the only creature of the night, after all.” Malleus moved to stand up from his chair, the seat he (and you) preferred to occupy during nights like these, walking towards him slowly. “Since I understand now why you frequent this place, I should take my leave.”

Sebek let out a sound of protest instinctively, ready to either drive or walk the man back to his home or whichever location he wanted to go to next, but Malleus waved him off.

“I don’t need to monopolize any more of your time, especially since you just got here. I already have your company nearly everyday for multiple hours a day.” His gaze drifted back to you, looking unsure as to whether you should insist on having Sebek escort him or otherwise. “Unlike a certain someone. I’ll go hail a ride by myself.”

“Do… Do you have the app for that installed on your phone?” Sebek asked, admittedly doubtful at the actor’s ability to book one for himself. Not that he could dare say his concerns out loud.

“Kids these days… Lilia taught me how to do it, remember?” he deadpanned, “now leave me be and don’t even think about being back at the hotel room until at least midnight.”

“Did you just get a reverse curfew?” you muttered in disbelief, attention all on him as Malleus took his leave. 

“I’m… a little confused myself,” Sebek admitted, “but I’m sure someone as intelligent as Sir Malleus has his reasons for imposing a, as you said, reverse curfew. In fact, I can think of a few right now!”

You looked surprised, which was an offense (none taken, but an offense nonetheless) to him. Sure, he would not say he was one hundred percent sure, false advertising was a crime, but he was at least ninety percent sure, which was more than decent by his standards.

“Oh? What do you think Malleus is trying to do?”

“It’s not that he doesn’t have his own sense of agency, but I have my reasons to believe that the chairman influenced him to visit you during his free time,” Sebek sighed, growing more and more embarrassed as the list of reasons began writing themselves in his brain. Was he actually going to reveal all of it to you?!

Of course he was. He never quite got the ability to keep his mouth shut unless told or, well, with you sometimes.

“Him coming here was probably due to a few things. First, they’re trying to teach me some kind of lesson. That is–”

“Wait, lesson?” you laughed, finding his answer a little absurd, “Do you think seeing me is a punishment?”

“OF COURSE NOT!” he denied immediately, “To imply as such is downright repugnant!”

“Pfft, it was a joke!”

“I don’t see how it could be humorous.” Sebek shook his head, wondering how you could afford to smile at his displeasure. What a terrible thing for someone to find your company even the least bit unpleasant; even more terrible, for someone to think he could dislike it, dislike you. “In any case, what I meant by lesson is that they might want to remind me that, as a bodyguard, my protection should not be limited to my employers and family. Rather, it should extend to good people. Like you.”

“That’s… That’s quite the sweet conclusion to arrive to, but…” you trailed off for a moment, as though hesitating to continue. “Sebek, do you really think that’s the reason Malleus told you to stay?”

“It would make sense, but there are other reasons, I’m sure.”

“Okay, then tell me another, since I’m not too convinced.”

“Well… It could be a reward,” Sebek said, “for a job well done. Instead of having to continue working at this hour, which I would be happy to do, I’m proud of what I can do as a bodyguard. I’m sure some consideration is in play by allowing me to spend time with a friend instead.”

“Ah, well, yes, but also no. I’m not sure how you can get it, but also not? At the same time?” you laughed, awkward but not demeaning. It still perturbed him, though.

“Okay? Then explain your thought process, then,” Sebek huffed, slightly frustrated at what he was not getting, “You seem to have talked a decent amount with my boss before I got here, somehow to the point that you can understand his way of thinking already.”

“I would, but he told me to keep it between us.” Before he could complain and demand to know anyway, you switched the subject very deliberately and, to your fortune, rather effectively. “So you think getting to spend time with me is a reward?”

Sebek’s eyebrows furrowed, indignant at your choice of ignoring his inquiry and at himself for not catching his word choice. Reward, was that the word he used?

“Hmph! Don’t get too haughty about it now!” he insisted, a warning that you would likely not take to heart, “It’s less reward and more a rewarding feeling, like something nice to look forward to before I end my day.”

“I see.” Except you’re not looking at him again, despite there being no one else to look at. Sebek should be frustrated, as he tended to be when people did not pay attention to him when he addressed them, but there’s something soft about your expression that has him okay with the slight impoliteness. He supposed even someone like him could fall victim to favoritism after all.

There’s another reason he could have told you that comes into mind, but he swallows it for now.

“I’ll go get you something to eat,” you told him, suddenly standing up and leaving him alone at his usual table. Sebek realized that might have been the first time the both of you had simply talked without anything in front of the both of you, no barriers, no disruptions. It was like those signs that were hung up in establishments sometimes, telling people to talk or read a book instead of using their phones and asking for the internet password.

Sebek abided by those quite a lot, reading whatever book he could lay his hands on (or an electronic book if his bag was strapped for space), but he never could have imagined talking to someone about… topics that he had never discussed with anyone, for a lack of a better term.

“There’s something I’ve been thinking about.”

“Yes?” You looked up suddenly from the plate of pastries you had picked up for him, genuinely curious and perhaps even showing an anticipatory flash of excitement. “Lay it on me.”

“So how long was my boss in the café? If you can’t give me the specifics… What were the topics, at the very least?”

“Oh? Interrogating me, are you?” you laughed, as though amused, though you looked away and had gone back to piling pastries, now on a second plate, so he could not see your expression. “Don’t worry, I only said good things about you.”

Shame as it was, it was alright. Even without seeing your eyes, he knows you are not one to lie, especially with such a matter important to him.

On one hand, he likes (more than, even, perhaps adores) the idea that you talked about him, good things at that. Beyond that, the idea that you could compliment him to his superior, a person he’s heavily respected since childhood, pleased him heavily. With that said…

It’s not jealousy or envy, per say. He knows what those taste like—he’s been eating and swallowing them up for years, after all—which is how he knows what he’s feeling isn’t anything associated with the sin. Rather, he supposes he’s… concerned. That talking to others about him would give you a certain impression of him, one that’s not very capable after all, even though he goes on and on about how dedicated and passionate he is when it comes to his job.

Dedication is one thing. Ability is another.

The thing is, Sebek’s come to the realization that he wants, needs you to think of him as someone capable, though he can’t be sure why the idea of you in particular showing disappointment in him scares him so much.

“Do you think I’m lacking in any means?” Sebek breathed out the question without any context, and while you looked somewhat surprised at the question, you don’t grill him for it either. Maybe you understood what he meant—you had gotten good at that, he thought, understanding him in a way others failed to.

“I can’t say for sure,” you replied honestly. You sit in front of him once more, placing two plates in front of him that would go unnoticed and untouched for a little while longer. “When it comes to work in particular. However… Most people aren’t exactly built to be perfect in everything, so everyone is lacking in something.”

You could have stopped there. It’s a model answer to a question he had sprung up on you for no real reason other than to see what you think or, maybe, to reassure himself over this and that. 

You don’t stop. Instead, you looked him in the eye and asked,

“Do you want me to tell you what I really think?”

“Please,” Sebek said, desperate not just for praise, but for feedback. As long as it was an opinion you held of him, that you had an opinion on him that wasn’t so… typical, he supposed.

“I think that when it comes to your character, I think you’re doing your best to become better and better each day. Whether this is the path you continue to take in the future or not, I think there’s one thing you will never lack—it’s your dedication.”

Sebek’s beaming the rest of the night, even when it’s mostly silent—him regaining his energy and calories, you asking him questions here and there about his day, him throwing them back at you. It’s peaceful and he’s happy, he’s happy and it’s got nothing to do with Malleus or Lilia or winning in a friendly martial arts spar against Silver; it’s got nothing to do with his parents doting on him or his siblings making him his favorite food. It’s got all to do with you and it’s just… terribly wonderful. 

It’s a minute after midnight when he stands by the entrance again, smile a little smaller, regretful to have to go, but teeth still blinding nonetheless. He’s thinking if he should ask if he can help you clean up next time, or if he should offer to drive you home—some other excuse to stick around a little longer, all under the guise of his boss’ orders, when you interrupt his reverie.

“Sebek, before you go, I need to ask you something.” You stood by the door. You don’t invite him in nor do you step outside with him, but you keep the door open to be able to talk to him. “Or tell you something. Both.”

“What is it?”

“Malleus told me your awareness levels are… a work in progress, but do you really not understand his intentions? Or, one of them, at least,” you asked, “I’m sure he and Lilia and Silver are very nice people who genuinely want you to spend more time with me as a friend, and that they’re curious about me as a person because I’m your friend, but it’s a little clear to me that they’re trying to see if they can get something else to happen by giving us more time alone, or purposefully seeking me out during a time you would usually come by.”

Sebek did not answer immediately, not because he did not understand where you were getting at, but because he had not wanted to acknowledge it. His awareness skills, he was told, were something he needed work with, but the base level was not zero.

After all, every mention of you brought upon implications upon implications. At that point, even he would get it. It was just that… it was embarrassing for you to realize it as well, so he tucked the reason he was very well-aware existed at the back of his mind.

Unfortunately, you already realized it, too.

With the silence that followed, you decided to continue.

“Malleus told me to keep this a secret, but it didn’t feel right,” you admitted, somewhat cautiously, like the man would be able to hear you break a promise, “so I’m telling you now. He was asking me what I thought about you, mostly, or what I felt. Anything to gauge if the two of us were actually in a relationship or if there was some way to set us up or get us together.

“It’s nice that he cares, but, you know, still a little shocking to have some world famous celebrity come up to you and ask you about your intentions with his bodyguard. Shouldn’t it be the other way around?”

“I have to apologize,” Sebek said, unsure of who, if there was anyone, really, to blame for the situation. He knew you had started it by appearing in their sights during the fanmeet, but he was the one who brought you up, and… Sebek was loathe to so much as think it, but even his seniors played fault, too, no matter how well-meaning they were.

“I’m sorry for bringing you into this. They’re just… I don’t mention anyone other than my family. I’m not exactly the most…” His voice dropped to a whisper, as though unwilling to admit something. “What I’m trying to say is that I hope you’re not off put by me all of a sudden because of this.”

“What? Of course not!” Without a second even passing you had countered the idea immediately, and in the evening, the sun had shone in his heart once more. “I was worried you would be put off by it! I mean, you never… I mean I like having you around, so it would kind of, really suck if you stopped because of, you know.”

You waved your hands around, unable to find the appropriate word. Sebek, articulate as he tried to be, understood the feeling this time around.

“No, no! It’s not a big deal to me! These kinds of things happen all the time in the entertainment industry, I’ve heard all the complaints first hand! If they’re mentally strong enough to handle all those rumors about them, then something this small shouldn’t bother me, nor should it you!” he proclaimed, and you nodded your head in agreement. 

“Thank the Sevens… I was seriously worried… You’re too important to me.”

Sebek stiffened in place. For a moment, he thought he would burst into… something, maybe flames, maybe an explosion, just something crackling and sparking and sparkling. You looked like you had expected him to shout, too, but when his voice had left his throat it had cracked like he was going through puberty once more. Uncertain, unsure, unconfident—words that he believed had long left his vocabulary since.

“I’m important to you?” Sebek did not quite realize it then, but he asked not for a clarification but a repetition. He heard it right, but what he needed was to hear it again.

“You’re important to me, Sebek.”

Sebek’s face was colored a bright red—he can see it through the nearby window’s reflection, hazy as it may be at this hour. 

It’s through that reflection, too, that he realized his hands had been shaking, torn between wanting to cover up his face and the smile growing back on it, to trying to hold onto… something, someone. He settled for curling one up in a fist, then clutching the lapels of his suit jacket the other. 

“I SEE! I SUPPOSE I…” He tried to respond with his usual bravado, but he could not compel himself to do it this time around. “Ahem, I…”

“Hey, you don’t have to–”

“No, let me say it,” he interrupted quickly. Your consideration was always appreciated, but he wanted to make things fair, to make sure you understood. “To you, I feel the same. You are… You are someone I… 

“You are precious to me.”

“Ah?” You let out a huff, some kind of sound of disbelief. He can’t blame you—he had meant to echo what you had told him for it would be the truth anyway, and yet a different statement had come out instead. “I thought you were going to say… Seriously…!”

Then, you shut the door on him. Before Sebek can so much as worry if he had suddenly ruined everything, you go from leaning against the counter—the transparency of the door had ruined your ability to hide yourself from him—to stomping right back up to the door, opening it wide.

“I’ll see you tomorrow. Please stay safe on the way back,” you breathed out, somehow looking more frazzled within such a short time frame.

“Of course I will.”

“Okay. Good.” Then, you do something he had only seen people do in the movies, something he had thought would never happen in real life, much less to him. 

You pulled him closer by his tie, almost as though you had wanted to drag him right back inside with you. Instead, though, you tug just strong enough to make him jolt forwards, letting him do the work of aligning himself to be right in front of you. With an anticipation he had never felt before, he abruptly shut his eyes, not knowing what else to do. 

Unlike the movies, you don’t leave a kiss on his lips. Because you are friends, and most friends don’t just… do that, he thinks. However, the chaste peck you leave on his lips does not feel that friendly either. 

There’s room for doubt, of course, because you are one of the only friends he even has, and the feelings he has with you have felt different than everyone else, but he just knows, for once not with his mind but with his heart, that he should not have felt that way receiving a kiss on the cheek from someone he saw as…  as…

“Good night!” you shouted, emulating his usual volume, before running back inside, actually trying to hide yourself from him this time.

On the drive home he tries to simply move past everything, but the whole event—the whole night, really—just keeps replaying in his head like a broken record. The stoplight is green and he’s thinking about how you’re such a wonderful friend and that you were exhibiting normal friend behavior. The stoplight is red and he has one hand off the steering wheel, too busy keeping it next to the cheek you had kissed.

Sebek tried to move on, really, but the thing is—

It’s almost one in the morning, so it’s a given that all the stores are closed. Some stores, however, keep the lights in their display windows open. He never would have noticed it before, but with Silver’s voice ringing in his head, it taunts him now.

—Sebek’s not very good at moving past anything.

Sebek didn’t believe in magic, he was a little too old for that, but that did not stop him from believing you might have cursed him somehow, maybe put some kind of magic in that tumbler you gave him, or the sweets he definitely did not enjoy that much and only ate for the dose of carbohydrates he needed.

It had to be some kind of curse, because why else was he actually heeding Silver’s advice—Silver, of all people!—regarding what kind of gift you might enjoy. Why was he pulling up his maps application for a store he had never even known existed until he passed by it some nights ago while thinking about you! Isn’t that crazy?!

“I can type it, you know,” you offered, comfortably strapped with a seatbelt at the back of his car. “Not that I know where we’re going in the first place, but…”

“I’ve got it,” he insisted, having already saved the address previously. “You’ll see. It’s just ten minutes away from here.”

“Should I be nervous?” you asked with a short laugh, “I feel like I should be, especially since I’m strapped so securely at the back of your car instead of, you know, the front next to you.”

“It’s what I’m used to, so it was just my instincts telling me to make you sit there,” Sebek admitted, “you can sit at the front if you want later.”

“Nice! Still don’t know where we’re heading, though. I don’t recognize the store name you inputted.”

“I passed by it while driving home one time,” while I was freaking out thinking about you kissing me, except not really the type of kissing people expect when they hear the term kissing, except it felt like a real kiss to me  anyway !

“I thought you might like some of the items they sold there.”

“Aww! Since when were you such a sweetheart?” you cooed, and Sebek used the excuse of being too busy paying attention to the road to respond to what you said. 

“I’m surprised you’re free today, though, since you don’t seem like the type to skimp out on work. You give me the vibes of someone who would try to train somehow by going to the gym or something when you have a break.”

“That’s true,” he replied, “though I’m not some kind of musclehead, if that’s what you’re implying!” he said, “I also do other things, though, like dropping by bookstores in the area, or attending interesting lectures in my alma mater, or–”

“–or seeing your favorite café owner after hours?” He looked at you through the rear-view mirror, watching you eye him expectantly. You might even be pouting—he’s not sure, he doesn’t want to spend too long looking at your mouth. He sighed.

“No, I do that even when I don’t have days off,” he corrected you, “It would be more accurate to say that I also spend my afternoons with a café owner, now.”

“What’s with the aversion to calling me your favorite? Do you have another café owner friend that I have to worry about?” you complained, more as a joke than anything, but Sebek felt compelled to appease you anyhow.

“Accusing me of being disloyal? How insolent!” he huffed, “Did I waste my paid leave on you after all?”

Sebek was lucky he was the one behind the wheel, considering you looked just about ready to slam the horn of the car… or slam him against it, he can’t be sure.

“Wait, I thought you were free?!”

“I AM! Why do you think I’m here? I took a leave, which means I’m free for the rest of the day!”

“I thought it was just a day off or something! Like, Malleus told you you didn’t have to accompany him anywhere or something!”

“I mean he did tell me that, or else I would be working.” He rolled his eyes, because was it not obvious that he would not just skip work if he felt that he was needed? He did not even think he would be ALLOWED to. “I’m healthy enough to never be ill so I don’t use them up. If anything, they were very much alright with letting me take a leave once I told them my reasoning.”

“Well when you put it that way,” you laughed, “they probably think you’re getting time off to take me out on a date or some–SEBEK EYES ON THE ROAD!”

“Don’t spring up something like THAT on me all of a sudden!” His hand gripped the wheel tightly, chest heaving as he very nearly ran a red light. “Not that you’re wrong, but, you know!”

“I definitely won’t while we’re on the road,” you muttered, tearing your eyes away from him to look outside of the window, “but, like… You know they’re going to ask you about today later, right?”

“I have time to figure out how to word my report.” He cleared his throat, “Okay, wait, we’re here. You can step out and head in already,  if you want. Parallel parking is… parallel parking.”

“No, no, I want to see how long it takes you,” you snickered, “come on, if you want to boast about being a terrific driver, this is essential to perfect.”

“Heh, you think you’re so cheeky and clever. This is why I shouldn’t favor you over anyone else—you’re too keen on taking advantage of it!” Ignoring that he had essentially admitted that he did favor you, he shooed you out of his car. When it came to parking properly, he had to use all of his mirrors and… Honestly, he was a little terrified he’d damage someone’s car because he miscalculated, distracted by your presence.

It takes him three minutes, which is way better than his latest record of four. He thinks it might be because he doesn’t want to keep you waiting, knowing he wouldn’t want to be kept waiting, too.

“Sebek, look!” You tugged onto the sleeve of his sweater as soon as he entered the store, attempting to navigate him carefully through the aisles, shelves filled with fragile objects and breakables that neither of you wanted to pay for.

Taking him to a more secluded area, you pick up a mug to show him.

“Doesn’t it look like you?”

“Because it’s green?” he deadpanned.

“No, no, look closely at the crocodile!” you argued. It was hard not to look closely since you were waving it right in front of his face. Other than the similarity in colors, he’s really not sure how it’s supposed to be him.

“I don’t see what you’re talking about.”

“I’ll make you see it then,” you proclaimed, “I’m getting it, then I’ll serve all your hot drinks with this mug so you’ll be forced to stare right at it. Then, you’ll realize I’m right.”

“You’re getting it because it looks—because you think it looks like me?! What kind of reason is that?” he coughed, pretending he did feel the least bit flustered by you. He took you here because he thought you might appreciate getting some nice mugs or plates or something for your cafe, and the first thing you pick out is something for him?! Isn’t that just unfair?!

“Oh, and I’m getting this one as well!” His eyes follow your fingertips, seeing you point at a mug themed after a brown rodent. Given that the animal-themed mugs seemed to be in alphabetical order, then that one was…

“You know capybaras are too big for crocodiles to swallow, right,” he explained, wondering if you were being purposeful in your selections thus far, “that’s why they can swim in the same waters.”

“In my heart of hearts that means they have a close relationship! Which means, I’ll be using that mug from now on, thank you very much,” you grinned at him, and all Sebek can do is take the two mugs from you, a lot more careful with his hold than he usually is. He’s pretty sure there’s only one left of the designs you’ve picked out, so it would be troubling if anything had happened to them.

“I can’t say I would have picked THESE out, but we went here for you, after all,” he began. He really did think there were designs more to his taste, like the squirrel themed one he saw by the display window, but he did not take his leave to go shopping for himself.

He was heeding Silver’s advice by getting you something practical you could use and, well, this was what he had thought of.

“So if you like these, then we’ll get them.”

“Wait… Sebek, are you offering to pay? I…” you trailed off, clearly remembering something. “No way… Is this about the tokens of friendship? You never forgot about that?”

“I use the tumbler you give me all the time. It’s pretty good for when I need something to drink during workouts, or keeping my drinks warm,” Sebek explained, “I wanted to get you something you could use all the time, too, so if you’ll let me pay, I’d be more than happy to!”

“I’ll think about it… I’m definitely not letting you pay for anything else I pick up, but if it’s those two…” you hummed, not giving an answer right away. 

That was fine by Sebek, who had made a numbered list in his head of things he could do for you as some sort of… he didn’t know how to describe it. Something to prove himself to you, he supposed. Impress you, maybe, or simply make you happy with him. Happy in general.

“You know, I’ve heard people talk about whether people should split the bill on a date or not, but I never really hear discussions about whether people should give gifts or not,” you laughed, “not that this is a date, but the same principle applies.”

You’re walking away from him, perusing the rest of the ceramics and metals, and it’s then the impulsiveness wins in him.

“I MEAN, IT’S NOT LIKE–” He forgets himself and where he is, but you’re walking right back up to him, so he supposes his volume was alright in the moment. When you’re close enough, though, his voice drops to just above a whisper. “It’s not like it can’t be a date. You don’t have to insist that it isn’t.”

“Well you didn’t call it one when you popped the question all of a sudden at five in the morning!” you argued, “Wait, you’re not saying date as in platonic date, right? I have nothing against it, but I don’t want to misunderstand–”

“I meant it in a… in a… You know! The not-just-platonic way!”

“Romantic?” you supplied helpfully… or maybe unhelpfully. He knew the word! Saying it out loud, in public, was just embarrassing for him! Not embarrassed of you or his feelings or anything, just embarrassing in general. He wondered how the leads in those dramas and movies and books made it look so easy when it was the most nerve wracking thing he’s done since his job application!

“Yes, romantic!” he exclaimed, suddenly grateful that there were no other customers besides them, and suddenly uncaring that the only other person—the cashier—could hear him. “If you want!”

“I’ve extended my café hours from eleven in the evening to midnight for you, in case you haven’t noticed,” you informed him, “Do you think I just added salmon pasta to the menu on a whim? Obviously I only added it because you said you liked it!”

“Well you’ve never told me that!” 

“Well, should I go ahead and tell you now? Sebek Zigvolt, terribly intelligent, incredibly cute, and occasionally dense, I–”

“Wait no!” He notices his grip tighten on the mugs, and he softens it just in time before any chips or cracks could appear on either one. “Not that, you know, I don’t… We shouldn’t say that here.”

“Why not?” you asked, not offended but certainly curious. 

“I want it to be more… special?” he cleared his throat, “Not that it can’t be, since you’re here, but I want to be more prepared when I say it, or when I hear it. Whichever comes first.”

“Okay,” you responded, nodding in understanding, “yeah, maybe this was a little out of nowhere. We don’t want to have regrets or anything.”

“No, we don’t,” he agreed. As much as he thought he would not regret any of his feelings for you, he did not want you to look back at this day and wish he had admitted his feelings for you some other way. He needed it to be perfect. “I’m glad we’re on the same page. About this and about, ah, our feelings… Right?”

“Right!” You left little room for doubt with your answer. You never seemed to when it came to Sebek. While he had absolutely no plans to admit it to your face anytime soon, he appreciated the lengths you went to make sure he would never misunderstand you or your intentions. Just as he was a man devout to chosen people, he was a man prone to doubt.

“That said… Is your offer to count this as a date still up for grabs?”

Sebek Zigvolt was well into his twenties, so the idea that he was back to talking to an inanimate object—a mug of all things—was bizarre to him. Downright embarrassing, actually. Sometimes he found himself regretting buying that squirrel-shaped mug, but you were just way too convincing and now he uses it to store his toothbrushes. Wonderful.

“Should I do it today?” he asked. It had no mouth so it could not speak, but the painted-on eyes staring back at him held a resounding no. 

“You’re right. Domesticity is one thing, but is it not too casual to confess in my apartment of all places…?” he murmured.

He checked his teeth for any food or stains one last time—old habits die hard when your parents are dentists—before leaving the bathroom.

“Thanks for letting me have lunch here,” you told him. You’re putting your shoes back on already and it reminded him that he, too, had to get back to work in a short while. “It’s hard to have a relaxing meal in my own café sometimes. I feel like I’ll end up doing work instead of eating.”

“And that would be no good! One must always rest without the distraction of work in the midst!” Sebek declared, walking over to the dining table, finding that you had already washed the dishes without him. You even remembered where he hid the towels—it took you longer to find them last time.

“Exactly, so I hope you don’t mind me coming here again. Though, if you’re free, I also know a good–”

A knock on the door interrupted the both of you. Sebek frowned, immediately reaching for something he could use to whack someone with in case of an emergency. Meanwhile, you walked over there without any hesitation.

“I’m already heading out anyway, so I might as well,” you explained, partially unlocking the door to get a peep of who was outside. “Oh. Silver, right?”

SILVER?! What was that man doing outside of his apartment? Not that he’d never been, but still! Couldn’t he have at least sent a text or call warning him? How rude, especially since he had a guest over, and…!

Oh Sevens, he had you over, and Silver saw. 

“That would be me,” the man replied, face less stiff than usual. His expression is somewhere in between actually smiling and trying to de-widen his eyes. “You’re Sebek’s…”

“Yeah, let’s leave it at that,” you laughed sheepishly, “I assumed you would be Silver because of the hair. You probably get that a lot. Anyway, SEBEK! YOUR FRIEND IS HERE!”

“WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING,” he shouted, “I CAN SEE HIM.”

“THEN I’LL LEAVE YOU TO IT,” you shouted back, “I’LL GO BACK TO WORK NOW.”

You unlocked the door fully now, allowing Silver to enter, you to exit, and Sebek… to also exit right after you. He knew it was not very hospitable of him to leave Silver to tend to his apartment, but it would only be for a minute anyway! The INTRUDER could handle himself for that long!

“Hold on,” Sebek called out to you, grabbing hold of your hand. “I should give you a proper farewell. It’s good manners.”

“You’ll see me again later anyway,” you laughed, “okay, come closer.”

Sebek’s gotten himself into a certain routine, he would put it, one that he loathed to break. Routine was routine for a reason, and there was no reason for him to not abide by it. What must be done shall be done.

You pressed your lips just next to his, narrowly avoiding them in favor of the corners where his smile lines were. Sebek suddenly wanted to go on a run so he could blame the sudden spike of his heart rate on the physical activity.

“I’ll see you later,” you said as you pulled away—from his face, from his hand, from him. This would have been the part where he would have offered to either drive or walk you back, but…

He sighed as he went back into his apartment. He wanted to muster up a frown for Silver, but he was still too giddy to stop himself from smiling in time. 

“Who said you could make yourself home in my place?” Silver, seated on his sofa and idly watching the news on his television, looked back up at him with a cup of coffee in his hand. Thankfully not one of the few cups you’ve brought and left in his apartment, but still. “And why are you here anyway?”

“I was nearby, so I thought it would be more efficient to ride together. Save gas, it’s better for the environment.” The man took a sip of his coffee (without sugar or cream or milk! Just how did he manage?), humming appreciatively. “Huh. Your partner’s pretty good at this.”

“That’s true,” Sebek replied, and then realized his mistake. “But, like I said, the two of us are NOT in a relationship.”

“There’s no point in lying, if you’re worried about being professional, since we don’t have a no-dating policy to abide by, unlike some talents out there,” Silver countered. That was NOT the issue though, unbeknownst to the man.

“I would NOT lie about this to you, and even more so to Sir Malleus and Sir Lilia!” he insisted. “We’re currently dating!”

“I’m sorry?” 

“Dating. No label yet. Like courting. There is a difference!” He said it like it was incredibly obvious, even though he had not realized there was a difference between going on dates and being in an official relationship before you had told him about it.

“Ah, well… As long as you’re happy.” Sebek wasn’t sure if Silver actually understood correctly, but he nodded his head anyway.

“Exactly. I feel happy, so you don’t have to pry.”

That was what Sebek told him, but, if he’s being honest… He really does want to confess soon. It’s why after a moment of silence, he caves—

“BUT… You know, if you have any advice, I would listen attentively. Even if it’s subpar. Your previous advice regarding the gifts were decent, so I would not be against hearing what you would have to say.”

Actually the advice was more than decent, considering it somehow led him to being one step closer to being with you romantically, which was more than he ever could have hoped. However, he did not want to give Silver the satisfaction and credit, so he would not say as much.

“You could have just said thank you…” Silver deadpanned, shaking his head.

Sebek should have realized that the perfect place, the perfect time, would be that which was both special and familiar to the both of you.

He’s reading through a small binder of papers his boss had given him. He’s red-faced, slightly frustrated, but extremely focused at each and every word and line and note written in the margins, eyes intense like the words were his prey, his meal, like consuming the words would mean he would embody them.

You clearly notice how his attention’s been completely captured by the papers in his hand considering you call him out for it. You never used to ask considering he sometimes held confidential documents, things even he can’t tell you, but you can’t seem to hold your curiosity this time around.

“My boss gave me his scripts,” he replied, “to clarify, he selected a few scenes from some of the movies and dramas he’s acted in.”

“You don’t seem as excited as I thought you would be.”

“It’s not that I’m not grateful!!! Being able to have papers from the original copy is wonderful! I’m sure these count as prized possessions!” he exclaimed.

“But?”

But the reason his boss gave them to him was embarrassing! His employer is terribly generous and kind, as expected, and maybe a little later he’ll be elated about being gifted them, but the fact that Malleus gave them to him so he could get an idea of how to confess to you simply made him want to shrivel up and wither.

A part of him didn’t want to explain it to you at all, perhaps think up some excuse on the spot, but he knew that honesty was important in all relationships, so he shouldn’t hide it from you. 

There’s also the fact that he’s not the best liar, but that’s entirely irrelevant.

“I told you that I wanted to wait for the perfect time to confess, so I would have the right words to explain my feelings for you this time around… But I’ve been having difficulty formulating the perfect order of words, order of sentences.” Sebek was bashful at the admission. Even though he knew it not to be true, he sometimes felt that you were better at conveying your feelings for him than he for you. He felt repressed by comparison, even though he did his best to showcase his affections whatever way he could.

In him was the desperate need to not just make you feel how you made him feel, but to make sure you understood just how you have charmed him; that, at times, his heart was more yours than his.

“With that, Sir Malleus, or perhaps Silver or Sir Lilia—who’s to say who made the suggestion—gave me a few scenes to read so I could be inspired to finally confess my feelings to you.”

“Oh!” you looked somewhat pleased by his response, Sebek thought with relief. At least you’re not upset that, after all this time, he’s still having trouble to the point that he’s trying his luck with external sources. “Well, do you think it’s effective?”

“I can’t say for sure,” he replied, “the lines are well written themselves! It’s just… Imagining myself saying them feels off, to say the least.”

“Well, you don’t have to restrict yourself to imagining,” you told him, “you can actually say them out loud.”

“In front of you?!” He would have done a spit take had he been drinking a beverage, which would have humiliated him and ruined his chances of ever confessing to you, he dramatized in his head. 

“It won’t count as your confession. Just think of it like a read through! Hasn’t Malleus ever made you do that while practicing his lines?”

“He has… So I suppose I do have some experience in this matter, even if it’s nothing professional,” he nodded to himself, arriving at a decision. “Yes. Alright. Well, have at this—I come here with no expectations, only to profess, now that I am at liberty to do so, that my heart is and always will be…yours…”

“Well, the line itself was rather captivating, and I liked the way you said it, although…” you stifled a laugh, “You looked so serious reading the script that I can hardly call it heartfelt.”

“That line wasn’t in the book the movie was an adaptation of,” he pointed out, a factoid he just happened to know. “I was just reminded of it while reading the script… I wonder if the line is too direct? What about… Anyone who has seen your smile has known perfection. You instill grace in every common thing and divinity in every careless gesture.”

“Very poetic,” you nodded, then joked, “if you ever consider switching careers, I’ll be your most toxic and supportive fan. I’ll go carry around your polaroid by daylight, then fight your antis by midnight.”

“How silly,” he shook his head, pretending he wasn’t a little flattered, even if it was a mere joke. “You already have a polaroid at the back of your phone case, remember?”

“Correction! Of us, not of you! Which, putting it that way, might be even better!” you laughed, “Though no point of using that against me when you have your copy tucked nicely in your wallet.”

“I’ve been meaning to take it out.”

“Sebek, you decorated it. With stickers your parents gave you when you had your last check up.”

“I TOLD them I was too old for stickers, but they insisted on giving me a sheet anyway!” he said, a well-prepared excuse in case you asked, “It would have gone to waste!”

“Of course,” you chuckled, “remind me to ask for a sticker sheet the next time I go to the dentist. Maybe I’ll even go out of my way to go to your parents’ clinic so we could match.”

“You’re ridiculous,” and terribly, terribly sweet and lovely, but ridiculous nonetheless.

“You love me anyway!”

“I’m not sure why I do.”

“Just like that!” Sebek doesn’t get what you’re on about, and he doesn’t for a while, even as you’re grinning at him, cheerful, beautiful. Honestly, he wishes he knew so he could do or say it again. 

“Just like what?”

“Sebek, you just told me you loved me.”

He froze.

“Had I?” he asked, voice a little shaky. Had he truly? If that was really the case, what an uneventful confession! How regretful and simple and incredibly plain, and–

“I’m not sure if you’ve ever considered this, but I don’t really need anything grand or incredibly put together.”

You take the papers from his hands, gently putting them to the side so his hands could hold yours instead. Sebek adjusts his grip; holds them more delicately—just tight enough a grip to feel that it’s truly you he’s holding, but loose enough to keep you comfortable. Your hands are precious; as is all of you. Not a prized possession for you cannot be possessed, but something to be treasured regardless.

“I feel that you deserve it, though,” he argues, a little forlorn, “I would speak my thoughts if I could. My mouth does not have the eloquence my brain has, I think.”

“You can try regardless,” you say, “it’s something I love about you. That in spite of failure, you will try and try.”

You, endeared to him beyond the limit he thought possible, had little trouble in convincing him. How could he, eager to impress you and eager to prove himself to you, refuse such a request? How could he when you tell him there is something about him you love, to state that there is love in your heart for him? How could he not attempt to say the same?

If it is for you, then he will swallow down his pride and try.

“In the past, I had wondered if the feelings I felt for you were that of romance or if I had been influenced by the opinions of others, if I even understood what romance was. Everybody knows that not all movies and books are true to life, and I was afraid I had misconstrued my feelings of friendship—for friends, to me, were few and far between—with attraction, if attraction was misconstrued with love. 

“But it had dawned on me, what I had felt for you, that night you had first kissed me.” He peels his eyes away from your own momentarily, pained an action as it is, glancing at the entrance. “The first night, I excused my constant thinking about it, about you, to the new feeling I had never experienced before. The second night, I was still thinking of you, and I excused it as simply wanting to sort out my thoughts as to what that action meant for you, all your intents and purposes.”

“And now?” His eyes returned to you, idly watching your lips move as you spoke. “What realization had you come to?”

“Even now, after several phases of the moon have come to pass, I still think of you—night and day, morning and evening. Nothing has left, for the only change would be the growth of my feelings.”

There is nobody else in the café, and yet he drops his voice to a whisper, as though not even the air would be allowed to hear what was meant for you and you alone. 

“I am sure more than ever, for how long I have tried to dispute or explain away my feelings, the tests I have done to make sure I could only be genuine with you… Tried and tested, tried and true, my heart and my soul is truly yours.”

“Sebek…”

You pull your hands away. The loss is mourned.

He thinks you’re saying something. He thinks and not knows because his ears stop working, just for a moment; among the vessels of his senses, only his eyes remain attuned, fixated on the way you stood from your seat, ridding yourself of the distance the coffee table forced between the two of you. It is only when you press your forehead against his that he feels everything again.

“Have I conveyed it to you?” he breathes out, pleading, “Do you understand me?”

“You never should have doubted yourself. I understand you perfectly,” you reply, smiling softly. “So let me make myself understood by you, too.”

end notes | masterlist of all my works | other sebek fics -> (the stories told, the charm you hold) -> (capture my heart, my voice into art) -> (stick to the script)

[ 1 ] Title comes from the phrases "tried and tested" and "tried and true", which I just combined with the sign off "yours truly".

[ 2 ] The AU idea came to me when I saw people make fancams of the bodyguards and back-up dancers of idols. It was kinda cute. I think they really deserve a lot of appreciation. Then the idea grew from there!

[ 3 ] For everyone’s ages, I sort of imagined Sebek and Silver to be in their 20s, basically typical post-college age. Malleus I’m not sure, let’s say 30s, and Lilia will be ??? (no one knows his age he has hid the documents). Basically they’re all working adults.

[ 4 ] Malum in se: wrong or evil in itself; sinful and wrong by nature (as opposed to malum prohibitum, which means something is wrong due to law dictating it).

[ 5 ] The first quote Sebek says is ripped from the Sense and Sensibility adaptation. Spoilers! Many think that the famous confession line, “I come here with no expectations, only to profess, now that I am at liberty to do so, that my heart is and always will be...yours," is also in Jane Austen's book, but it's actually just in the movie! I actually like the adaptation and the line, by the way! Just a fun fact!

[ 6 ] The second quote is altered to be gender neutral. It's from Edmond Rostand's Cyrano de Bergerac. The original is, "Anyone who has seen her smile has known perfection. She instills grace in every common thing and divinity in every careless gesture.'

[ 7 ] Fun fact! Malleus purposefully chose scenes from book adaptations since he knows Sebek is a reader, so he would appreciate it more.

[ 8 ] I actually had a lot of ideas for this fic and universe in general that I just can't fit in so maybe I'll revisit it some other time with one of the other Diasomnia boys.

last edited: 19/03/2023, for misspellings, changing cafe -> café

[live-laugh-lenney]

Hellur, how are uu!!! This is my first time in tumblr. And there are only a few of george clarke or arthurtv fics. Very thankful for one of the people who creates them🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️

May i request a reaction for Arthur or George where all of their fans love their gf, especially she's just a normal beautiful gal 😍😍😍 what if their girl has dimplessss

hi lovely. welcome to tumblr, welcome to my blog, welcome to a safe place to come vent and chat all things arthurtv and chaos crew as well as youtube! lots of love! thank you for popping by - don't be a stranger, at all. i have so many thoughts for this :')))

G E O R G E

everyone loves her.

he takes his time to introduce her publicly because she's isn't a girl who is known - she's not a youtuber, she's not a tiktoker, she's not an influencer so he wants to slowly wean her into the chaos of his life and shield her from twitter's hate and the tiktok comments that will be written about her.

because, of course, there will always be some people who dislike her - its part and parcel of being with him and she knows that.

those that love her, she loves back. she always keeps an eye on her social media, always checks in with them, replies to their tweets and she does little q and a's on her instagram story about herself... with the occasional question about her and george or anything to do with their relationship (without going into much detail - she leaves that for his podcast).

and he definitely has her on for an episode, alongside andrew, like a couple's podcast episode where they just spill the beans on what it's like to date max and george. from the horse's mouth comments from someone who is dating someone so loved and well-known in their industry line of work.

"i'm pretty sure everyone loves yn more than they love me."

"what can i say? you're not the only one with a pretty face., georgey boy."

"it's the dimples, i'm telling you."

and she will always tease him because she knows how loved she is in amongst his followers. always having pictures taken at events they see her at, taking cute and funny selfies, hugging those who want to give her a hug and george just loves to see it happen.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

A R T H U R

his followers speculate before arthur actually announces that they're in a relationship...

he's much more of a soft launcher with the two of them as opposed to completely introducing her - he never sees the point in posting her alongside her social tags because she's not someone known to many in the world.

he can't hide on social media; and that doesn't stop him from being a simp for her. people go digging once they see them together in public, people see that he likes her posts, they can see his comments and he doesn't see the problem because that's his girl and if he wants to show his love for her than he can. he just chooses not to launch her hard by giving her a dedicated post so people know who she is.

so when it's been long enough, and he sees that people love her and want to see more of her, he starts bringing her onto his channel.

that's how he properly and formerly introduces her.

"yn's here with me today."

"he needs the views, figured he may as well use me as clout."

"well- no, that's not- no-"

he gets so soft in the face, cheeks going red and he stutters and she loves that he still gets giddy over how she has such witty remarks back to him.

"i'm just messing, i'm here for my five minutes of fame."

"again, not what's happening."

and it's just sweet moments where people can truly see them for how they actually are together - so sickeningly in love with each other that it's almost too sweetly gross to witness.

and, my god, the edits that come out of it are something yn could sit and watch for days because it really captures just how they are as a couple. and she's no stranger to sharing them on her socials, saving them to her camera roll, showing them to arthur when they're sitting and aimlessly scrolling their accounts, commenting how she loves them and that it's so special to have their sweet and loving moments documented in such a way.

out in public, he's so soft with her and always stands close to her on their museum dates and they're always holding hands down the busy streets of london and he always holds her close to him on the tubes whenever they need to get public transports and he's always weary of her going over to meet those who had seen the two of them in the street... people take photos, they take videos, they share them all over the internet - they can't stop them from doing that. he knows she's just being kind but he always tells her that she can never been too careful. but she loves them just as much as he is thankful for them; and of course, he sits back and watches as they start showing off how much they adore her. xx

[mapofthemazeinthemirror]

TXT with a vampire significant other

warnings: vampire reader, mentions of mortality?, blood not mentioned :)

note: I don't know where they come from, but the vampire thoughts keep coming! More Beomgyu x vampire reader on my 18+ nsfw blog!

☆ gender neutral

Even after you've been together a few years, you still catch Soobin admiring you as if he's smitten; your beauty and grace never wear off for him, and he still gets a little flustered and stuttery. You know he would spend every second of the rest of his life by your side, but you still want him to properly live it, not hide away with you all the time. So you let him introduce you to his friends, hard as it is for you to be around humans, and tag along to spend time with them for as long as you can stand. You find it gets easier each time, and more worth it to see your boyfriend laughing and enjoying time with his buddies.

Though Yeonjun knows you can't cry, he seems to be tuned in to your emotions. It's as if he can sense when you're upset. He knows you're older than him—though you've only given him a ballpark figure of just how many years you've seen—but, you're still his baby. He never lets you wall him out; even if you think it's too disturbing for a human to hear or he won't be able to understand, he wants to try. As the only person who knows your true nature, he wants to be someone you can open up to, tell all your secrets and fears to. He feels he can take it, because he loves you.

Beomgyu wants to hear all the stories—the real, true ones, not legends and lore that he can find on the internet that could just be foktales—and he wants to hear them from you. So many late nights are spent talking, Beomgyu mostly listening and throwing out questions and comments to your information. He listens so intently, eyes growing wider and wider, wrapping you even more around his little finger, especially when he breaks into an impressed smile during your recounts of things you've seen or done. When it's very late and Beomgyu refuses to sleep, too enthralled by the conversation, you retort to a little trickery; you gently brush your fingers through his hair over and over until his eyes start to grow heavy, continuing to talk in your quiet musical voice, until you've lulled him off into a deep sleep.

Taehyun has always been the strong one, but with his vampire partner, he often forgets that he's weaker and more vulnerable. Despite his love being immortal, he still acts in a protective way of them; walking on the side of the sidewalk on which he can shield them from threatening looking oncoming foot traffic, doing the heavier and more dangerous jobs around the house. It's natural to him. He doesn't even consider the fact that you don't need him to do these things. He won't admit it, but he's a little embarrassed that you can lift him off the ground with such ease.

Huening Kai is big and clumsy, while you are graceful and dexterous. You're always catching things he knocks over or drops before they can hit the floor, Kai apologising every time he notices your quick save. You just kiss his cheek and reassure him with a smile. The two of you are so in love, and Kai can't help but think about the future—the one where you live forever and he doesn't. It pangs his heart, the thought of you moving on and finding someone else after he's gone, and he often has nightmares about it. It takes a while for him to come clean about the context of the dreams you wake him from, and you're quick to make him understand that falling in love is not something you do often, with vampires or humans. It's just something that happened because you happened to meet him.

written by mapofthemazeinthemirror - do not repost my work in any form

[milkywayes]

My art year in review!

I only started this blog properly in August, so I put two pieces per month. Thank you everybody for your warm reception and enthusiasm—everyone who reblogged, everyone who left tags and commented: this has truly been the highlight of my year, and I've never been so productive before! (Guess I really, really like drawing these same two people over and over again.)

[imptwins]

ALRIGHT, no more messing around I suppose.

Over the last twelve months my close friend @kimberlyeab and myself have been the targets of sustained harassment by a series of "anti-ship" accounts, that may or may not be the same person, that I am not going to name up here because I do not want to give them any more traffic than necessary. This is over some of the content we make, 18+ fiction revolving around Undertale and Deltarune, and sometimes involving dark kinks. I'm going to ask you to put aside whether you think this is immoral for the moment.

Under the break below is what I wrote a few hours ago. Things have since escalated. Both myself and Kim have been targeted by email bombs on our business emails, services/bots that spam your email address with garbage signups, rendering your email address completely unusable. At worst, this can overwhelm your email service so much that your account is unable to process new emails and is eventually disabled by the provider. I'm still getting bursts of activity after over 200 emails, so I'm not sure if it's dying down, or if it's so backlogged that this is what's happening.

This is literally a crime, by the way. It's classified as cyber abuse.

On top of this, whoever has done this has access to personal information. A full legal name, first and last, was used in several of the signups, so they are either implicitly threatening to doxx us, or simply flexing that they could. Likewise a crime.

Additionally, this seems well coordinated, but there are no suspicious recent results for us in The Usual Places. This makes me believe this person is probably using some foul back-alley site like KF to organize this. I don't think the legal name in question could have been acquired by one person, it's extremely difficult to trace back.

tl;dr: whoever is doing this knows their way around the internet and is actively dangerous, they are severely impeding our lives and have the potential to become incredibly, incredibly dangerous.

Why am I posting this? Not really to get those accounts in trouble (although you should absolutely stay the hell away from them, and severely scrutinize anything they leave a mark on). I don't think they'll be punished, nor would it help since they constantly block evade, and at this point I don't think this recent online abuse crap is actually them, just someone attaching themself to their crusade. Though I'm not sure.

What I want to illustrate is how these kind of callout posts feed into targeted harassment of minorities. This is just another reason why things that make you uncomfortable should be dealt with by curating your experience using tags and blacklists and blocks, rather than trying to assign moral value to what people make. If my content makes you that uncomfortable I *actively encourage* you to block me.

It doesn't matter whether you personally dislike minorities or not, or whether you're subconsciously targeting them, or whatever. Someone else who does will latch on. That person who writes nothing but callout posts, yet they're always for small trans creators who make some 'icky stuff' and never for big-name bigots who parade their bigotry out in the open; is it because they're a sock puppet of an overt reactionary, or just because they want to feel some control over their life so they subconsciously focus on vulnerable people?

Simple: you can't know.

These people are the dangerous ones. Not people who just make content, properly tag it, and mind their own business. But these people, obsessed with ruining other people, with finding 'evil' in the world so that they can purge it? You can find their name below if you really want, and literally their entire blog is just constant callouts, broadcasting people doing callouts, trying to network with other people who do callouts. This is why these people were originally called 'antifans', their entire fandom presence is centered around tearing other people to shreds.

Do your due diligence and fact-check, before you broadcast that someone in your fandom did something awful. Make sure they actually hurt someone. I know mega-bastards will use 'you can't prove it' as an excuse, but actually analyze it a bit. It's almost always painfully obvious, I know, I spent years doing antifascism. And more than anything else, neither entertain, nor broadcast, nor embolden the kind of people who dedicate their entire existences on the internet to lateral abuse. Not just these particular ones, but ANYONE who dedicates their life to this online torch-waving garbage over fictional content. Whether they're a reactionary or just projecting trauma, whether they actually hate x y or z minority or they just happen to always go for the most vulnerable people, whether the person they're targeting makes content that makes you feel very icky and gross or not, these self-ordained Crusaders are consistently, unquestionably, dangerous.

That's one page out of 4. Also some of them have between 10 and 80 updates in the one email from the same address. There's about 300 emails all up. And there's zero reason they can't do this again.

===

Anyway. The accounts in question are @snowcollecter/@brieffamilycat/@krispy-chicken-shipping/@bonniehbunny. First two are definitely them, I highly suspect the latter two are their main, or at the very least someone who constantly signal boosts them. We have endured over 12 months of:

calling for brigades against us, and at least 4 other people

block dodging to constantly screenshot and reference our posts

literal libel by accusing us of grooming a child despite screenshots, as well as both statements and direct requests to stop by both the supposed groomed child and their actual friends who witnessed all interactions we had

spamming anon asks to literally every single person that they can find who we ever interact with

using tiktok cen)sor)ship nonsense to get past peoples' blacklists and force this stuff in front of them

using no less than 3 confirmed alts with about 5 more extremely suspicious accounts in attempts to artificially broadcast themself and again evade blocks (when the original account itself is transparently an alt too)

joining multiple random discords to try to shove this stuff in peoples' faces

now spamming Kim's business email at signup services

probably being behind the attempts to doxx and raid us last year on a certain hate-monger website, since the signup spam demonstrates they're cool with bog standard channer troll tactics

They also pretty tellingly refused to even talk to this minor we supposedly groomed, who attempted to tell them personally that we hadn't done the shit they claim we did. You'd think someone who is this caught up about the safety of minors in fandom spaces would jump at the chance to help this kid, to tell them not to talk to us and get them away from us, to convince them to stay away? No, they said 'I don't talk to minors' (this is demonstrably untrue: their discord accounts are in many all-ages spaces) and immediately blocked them.

Of course. Because this was never about the safety of minors. Flip a coin; if it's heads, they're a far-right sock puppet who just knows they can use the 'think of the children' angle to drive a wedge into queer communities. If it's tails, they're just a routine runt who's projecting their lack of ability to do anything about the ACTUAL assholes of this world onto other queer people, wailing and flailing and doing anything they can to have some influence despite getting 3 notes on almost everything they ever post. Hence the anon asks, and Discord spam, and blacklist/block evading. If they can't have a platform - because anyone who looks at their garbage for more than a month at most sees how absolutely deranged they are - they'll just force people to see it.

Do they ever attack actual transphobes, which this fandom is not at all short on? Well, sort of! They did one or two callout posts about a TERF who used to run in these spaces... But didn't say anything about the TERF shit. Just the porn. The porn constantly put behind age confirmations and thorough tags/content warnings. This person spouted generic 'all-powerful trans lobby' 'social contagion' 'please look at this study about desistance I found on a hard-right website' bullshit, but no, it was them drawing aged-up highschoolers (REMINDER: NOT EVEN CANONICALLY UNDERAGE, JUST VAGUE HIGHSCHOOLERS, *AND* THEY WERE EXPLICITLY OLDER IN THEIR CONTENT!) that was apparently the greater evil.

I'm not even really sharing this to call them specifically out or draw attention to them. Regardless of whether they're a chud in a mask or just someone who severely, *severely* needs psychological help about their obsession, they're not going to stop. They've made that plainly obvious. At this point I've basically just accepted I'm going to have this deranged stalker until I leave the fandom, which I don't plan to do anytime soon so buckle up I guess.

No, I just want people to see what these people are like. How they ignore the people they claim are victims. How they employ the same tactics as doxxing websites and old channer trolls, or even outright enlist them. How they only EVER put sustained effort into taking down queer people with small platforms because going after the in-plain-sight actual bigots and scumbags would just be too much effort, a reflection of how this is about feeling righteous and powerful, not actually making the world better. They create nothing, they contribute nothing, they bring nothing but arguing and drama and isolation to the spaces they inhabit.

These kind of people are blights on the fandoms they cling to. And any time you act like their *miserable* Hays Code, Jack Thompson With A Rainbow Flag, no kink at pride, BDSM is abuse, drag queens are indecent, cover those ankles *garbage* warrants any notice at all, you deal another blow to the fandom you are in, because nobody wants to be around these little goddamn nightmares. edit: I know how red-flag any grooming allegations are, if you want the full story to that I already addressed it here. tl;dr, no, we did not let a child look at our porn let alone show it to them, we in fact stopped them from doing so. We are not in some secret private 18+ server with them, we actively ensured they STOPPED making themself unsafe, and have strained extremely, extremely hard to keep our very limited interactions with them transparent, scrutinizable, and appropriate. The only reason we even stuck around was because it became rapidly apparent they were in an abusive living situation which we occasionally gave them advice to manage, eg helping them look up boarding options, unlike the torch-waving dipshits who did NOTHING to reach out to them or help them in any way. They're doing much better, both in their home life and in terms of not following or privately palling around with 18+ creators anymore, thanks to us, and at the expense of both our mental health and reputations. You're fucken' welcome.

[blueparadis]

❝ BORROWED ❞ + GOJO SATORU !

+. CWs —» slice of life au + band au, pov!shift, use of italics, f!reader, guitarist!gojo satoru, angst and feels, $mūt descriptions, domesticity, some past incidents, undertones of fwb and hook-ups, mutual pinning but kinda angsty, confession. wc – 1.5kish

+. PRECIS —» Gojo Satoru chased her like a traveler chases a mirage in a desert until she became his muse.

+. NOTES —» this was originally for ex’s & oh’s collab for oh’s hosted by @trafaligar ( @/zorotits ) but now it's just a plain drabble since I'm super-late; OH! this is also my first time writing on him properly, celebrating the ‘unboxing event’ by a lil drabble || redirect to blog navigation. also tagging – @dearestgojo @satorhime @orchid3a.

“No time is wasted, ever. It just passes and we as humans misunderstand it, always.”

“Misunderstand ? Time ?,” (y/n) said half-turning towards her one night stand. One of his arms is still over her waist, and the other sort of acted as a pillow for her. His eyes are vivid and lips, a little mischievous enjoying her reactions to his actions.

“Um-hm”

(y/n) turned towards him, completely. He bites the inner side of his bottom lip watching her adjust herself in his huge frame, tucking herself towards him. “What’s that supposed to mean, Satoru?” she whispered keeping her palms on his naked chest looking at him in a cheesy way. Tsk! such a tease. Satoru pulls her towards himself closing the inches gap between them earning a tiny gasp from her. His hands are rough but he is gentle now. His words are generally crude but now it's mellowed. “Well.” Satoru swiftly pulled his arms from underneath her. “Not telling.” he said sitting by the edge of the bed. The blanket is still clustered around his torso yet (y/n) frowned and turned the other way again.

“oh! What's this? Feeling shy after having sex with me. ” Satoru quipped slipping into his trousers. But she did not respond, not verbally. Just another eye roll before leaving the bed. Gojo notices that she is wearing a tank top and a boxer-brief, the visible skin glowing from getting freshly fucked.

Come to think of it, Satoru does not remember the time he was lulled to sleep. He remembers coming home with her, a bit drunk and needy, eating her out, fingering her, getting a skilled blow job . . . ( even though he was hesitant at first; but when you got on your knees, assured him with a smile that you are gonna be just fine, that he is gonna be just fine, he could not help but feel a little jealous. how many guys have you been with before him? He likes it, he likes you being confident and bold but does not like the way you got here. But that is not something he should think about right now. Never let the one-night stand dwell after dawn. ) . . . and then fucking her against the glass window of the balcony. He even remembers taking a shower without her, eating chop-suey with her at two in the morning, and enjoying the cold gusts of wind and the smell of tobacco lingering from her fingertips and corroding his nostrils. He even remembers singing her a song, boney fingers strumming against his guitar with her cheeks pressed against his shoulders and soft hands curling around his belly as he sang :

“Let's fall in love for the night

And forget in the mornin'.” Satoru is not much of a singer. He has never been one. That part belongs to Utahime. But when he heard ( y/n ) humming with him, he continued to sing :

“Play me a song that you like

You can bet I'll know every line.” ( y/n ) locks her hands over his tummy and her voice rises feeling Satoru's smile reverberating through her cheeks.

“I'm the boy that your boy hoped that you would avoid

Don't waste your eyes on jealous guys, fuck that noise

I know better than to call you mine.” (y/n) was still naked, only the stained bed-sheets wrapped around her body while Gojo still sang in that untoned voice. It was a good laugh, a good tease for him to be used later in the day.

When Satoru came to bed after smoking another joint, (y/n) was half-asleep. He does not particularly remember if they talked a bit or not, but all he remembers is the feeling of her boobs against his arms as he clamped his hands around her waist. He even heard a chuckle, as if she was mocking him, he could have sworn it — as if he was being a little more vulnerable than usual. But when she took his arm and interlaced her fingers with his, maybe that is when he fell asleep, maybe . . .

“Sa-toh-ru” You call his name one more time before taking your bag. With his hair down, half-clad he looks like a complete stranger. It was not always like this. He was like an open book to you. You could read his thoughts without him verbalizing it, and he was aware of it— through and through. But now, you are introduced to an entirely new side of him— which is a lot more mature and mutilated contrary to the side you always knew of him— childlike and unscathed.

“Yeah! Coming.” he yelled being out of your vicinity. By the time you were done wearing your pumps and covering the first set of staircase Satoru had already caught up with you or did you get slower? Is he actually keeping up with you or are you letting him keep up with you? After this impulsive long night, it is hard to say who is leading whom. Sometimes it was Satoru who would lead the way, sometimes it was ( y/n ); now they almost coincided. But parallel lines never coincide, or do they?

“Here, sit.” Satoru stated firmly grabbing her by the wrist and making her sit in front of him. The bus is not at all crowded. He could easily sit beside her but he would rather not. He needs to keep her at a distance. He needs to let his feelings sediment. He needs to clam down, not lose his wits because he just had sex with that one person he held dearest for the longest time. He needs to tell Suguru about it, otherwise he will explode, or at least he thinks so.

“Satoru,” you patted on the space beside you asking him to sit. Ah shit! Now he has to sit beside you, he cannot stand and wait for his mind to be at calm. “you know you can't stand and wait forever ” Satoru chuckles and takes the seat beside you. The bus is currently going towards the jam-venue. It is still forty minutes from the next turn. He has forty minutes to have you as a lover. These fleeting moments, where Gojo has the chance to steal her from the world and make her his and only his. These little secrets, tiny bubbling affection — your temper and tantrums — your angers and anguish — he can have it all if he could just bury his feelings that he has for you under the carpet. You would trample them every time you visit him on weekends, and he would let you. He would let you just to forget the history you share with him, just for mere a few moments when he could have you as a lover rather than a friend.

Even though ( y/n ) was not a part of the band, somehow she was intimately attached with his band. Every weekend she would go to watch them, watch his friend, Satoru, only him. Yeah, that's right. All she needs is courage, courage to say her feelings out loud before saying it to anyone else, even him. Just as he said during this noon, “No time is wasted, ever. It just passes and we as humans misunderstand it, always.”

Besides his reaction would not be a surprise to you. Satoru would be surprised if you were to acknowledge his feelings for you, acknowledge your feelings for him. Satoru would say something like, “Oh! So you knew all along?”

Satoru interlaces his fingers with hers earning her surprised stares. Finally, for once she is surprised by his behavior. “Yeah I know.” he beams. “I wasn't planning to.” Thirty-five minutes from the destination, thirty-five minutes for you to calm yourself down. Thirty-five minutes of his stone-cold fingers filling the gaps in your palm. So, he is nervous too. Oh! has he been nervous all along?

Satoru could feel her nervousness at her fingertips, as they tightly held onto his palm. If he were to look hard enough, maybe he would see the imprint of your palms through his. If he had been careful enough maybe he would not have confessed so blatantly, so plainly. If he had been courageous enough maybe all his songs would be about ( y/n ).

—

@tokyometronetwork

[the-way-of-words]

PolyVerse Cam Boy AU

Nicholas Ruffilo x Holly(ofc) x Noah Sebastian Content warnings: sex work, consensual voyeurism, exhibitionism, oral sex (fem receiving), P in V sex, fwb to lovers Contains sexual situations with fictionalized versions of real people. This is fake, none of this happened, but if its not your thing, please hit the back button or scroll on. I don't even know what to say for myself here... you can thank/blame the lovely @throwingmetothelions who asked for a PolyVerse take on her Cam Boy HC and... well. This happened. This is an AU and unrelated to the main PolyVerse canon. <DISCLAIMER> THIS IS BLOG IS SEX WORK POSITIVE and if that's not your thing then please keep scrolling.

tag team: @ladyveronikawrites @nerdraging4point0 @cncohshit @jxstthisonce @kingdomof-omens @deathblacksmoke @signs-of-ill-portent

please let me know if you would like to be added to a tag list

Part of the PolyVerse AUs // Master list

~~~~~~~

Noah’s stunned when Nick comes to him with the idea. 

“Are you sure she’s okay with this?” He asks, staring his friend down. “I know you guys hook up sometimes, just like I know she knows we hook up sometimes, but…” Noah lets the rest of it go unsaid. 

It’s different when it's on the cam streams. 

They’ve both been doing this for a while now, jerking off online for money. It started off as a joke at first, an offhand comment by one of his exes about how he could make some quick cash, with Nick starting his own shit up not long after and while they don’t really need to do it anymore, it’s kind of fun. They jerk off anyway, so why not keep it up? Help keep some money in their pockets for the lean times. 

They’re no strangers to collaborating, they always make the most bank when they’re together, but something about bringing someone else in makes him pause. He understands where Nick’s coming from, though. There’s been a few requests—mainly from women—that they should show others how to get a girl off properly. Because they seem to know exactly how to talk to get a pussy wet, they might be pretty damn good with women too.

Nick rolls his eyes. “Yes. I’m sure she’s okay with it… Who do you think I was on the phone with earlier?” 

He watches the gears turn in his friend’s mind and Nick’s certain he’s going to say yes, Holly’s a fucking catch. She’s hot as hell, not to mention cool as shit, and he knows… he knows Noah’s curious, just like Holly’s curious about Noah. Neither of them would ever admit to it, but he knows they’ve thought about each other like that. He’s seen the look on Noah’s face when he’s face-timed with Nick and caught an accidental eyeful of Holly in the background. Not to mention, he knows Holly’s seen a stream or two. What, you really think I wouldn’t support my best friend and his other emotional support best friend/fuck buddy? 

“Look. She said yes, and before you ask, yes, she knows what she’s getting into… She’s watched a couple of our streams before. But she’s only going to do this if you’re on board with it too.”

Noah takes a deep breath, exhaling noisily as he narrows his eyes at Nick. “Fuck, okay, fine. I’m in.”

~~

It takes a few days to put it all together, and in that time, Noah’s been able to convince himself that everything is fine. It’s just Holly, and it’s just sex, he tells himself. They’ve all known each other for years, but thanks to him living in California most of the time, he’s never gotten as close to her as Nick has, but her wicked sense of humor tells him they’d get along great if they had a chance. And as for the sex thing…

As much as he’d never tell Nick or Holly, he’s not gonna try to lie to himself and say he’s never thought about her like that. She’s beautiful; all dark hair and soft curves, curves he’s gotten a glimpse of a time or two when he’s video called Nick right after they’ve been together. He can’t actually say what’s got him so twisted up about it, so he pushes it away because, it doesn’t really matter.

Yet it all comes rushing back the minute he opens the door and sees Holly standing there. It’s been a while since he’s seen her. Her dark wavy hair now just barely brushes her shoulders, the remains of a bright color on the ends, and he wonders if it’s as soft as it looks. His eyes track down her body, noting how the thin straps of her white cotton dress leave her shoulders bare, save for the smattering of freckles that he itches to map with his tongue. A weight drops in his stomach, cock stirring in his jeans when he notices the strappy leather harness and the way it frames her breasts. 

Noah doesn’t realize he’s been staring too long until she clears her throat. “So, uh, you wanna let me in?” 

Shit. He mentally curses himself, stepping aside. “Sorry—yeah, come on in.”  

“Thanks.” Her smile is almost shy as she moves past him and, fuck, if it doesn’t endear him to her more.

He’s just about to ask her how she’s been when Nick comes out of the bedroom to greet her.

“Hey--” Nick starts, trailing off when he fully sees her. “Wow. Look at you, huh?”

Holly laughs, “I’m sorry… You were the one who told me to, and I quote, wear something pretty you can get fucked in. Is there a problem?”

Noah can’t keep his laugh to himself when she drops her voice down an octave, trying to imitate Nick. “She’s got a point, dude.”

“I have absolutely no problem with it… I just might have a hard time keeping myself on the task at hand.” Nick says with a roll of his eyes, and his hands curl into fists at his sides briefly before he lets them go, reaching one out to pinch the white skirt, “You know how I feel about this dress.”

She smirks. “Why do you think I wore it?”.

~~

“Everyone’s different,” Nick settles himself behind Holly on the bed, his chest to her back so he can touch her and still be able to see what’s being said in the chat. “But sometimes Holly likes it with a little sting..” She makes an agreeable noise when Nick nips at her neck, head tipping back against his shoulder as he soothes it with his tongue. His hands rake up her thighs, tangling in the soft material of her dress, pulling it up the higher they go, and Noah almost chokes on his tongue when he realizes that save for the trimmed thatch of curls, she's bare under that dress.

Noah watches the tattooed hands pet down her inner thighs, fingers fluttering against the skin as they make their way to her pussy. They skirt around her folds, brushing everywhere but where she seems to want him the most. Nick chuckles lowly when she whimpers, his hands moving to her hips to hold her still when rocks them slightly, trying to entice him to touch her.

“Oh, come on, Holly. You know we’re just getting started.” 

She huffs. “You know it’s not nice to tease.” 

“Yeah,” Nick laughs, “but we have an audience this time… and foreplay is important." 

Noah follows Nick’s eyes to the computer monitor where the chat has been going wild while their attention has been elsewhere

<Sherry_Bomb29> He hasn’t even really touched her and it’s still so hot

<Alotta2love> foreplay? what’s foreplay?

<HannieBanannie> this has to be the best friendship in the world holy shit

“Oh, I hope you’re joking, Alotta2love. Foreplay is awesome.” Nick’s always been good at this. He can work this type of audience in ways Noah can’t. “Doesn’t matter what the main event is, you still should warm each other up… even if one of you is impatient.” 

Holly scoffs at the dig, biting back playfully. “You’re such a shit. Like you’ve never been impatien--” she cuts off, gasping when Nick’s hand delves back into her center, slotting his fingers into her folds, avoiding her clit while the other hand grips her thigh tight. He can see the way her flesh indents around the digits, and Noah wonders if Nick’s ever left bruises on her, if that’s what he means when he said she likes it with a little sting. 

Holly whimpers just as Nick dips a finger into her and he cusses, “Fuck. How are you already this wet?” 

“Gee… I—I wonder.” She huffs, breathless. “Nick… Please--”

Nick nods, snickering, “I got you, Holls. Come on.” He moves out from behind her, letting her settle on her back before stretching out on his stomach between her legs. “You know,” he says, voice muffled in the skin of her inner thigh, “you’re lucky there’s more that needs to happen here. Having you all needy like this makes me want to spend all night seeing exactly how desperate I can make you.” 

He noses along her folds, pulling another whimper from her before he lifts his head, raising his voice a bit as he addresses the stream. “Now when you find yourself ready to put your mouth to work, you never want to start full on… You need to build it up before you just suck on your partner's clit. Holly like’s little swipes of the tongue along her clit at first before I bring my fingers into it.” Nick lowers his head and does just that, swiping and rolling his tongue on her as Holly moans, hands curling into Nick’s sheets, and the sound goes straight to Noah’s cock. God, he’s so hard it hurts. He presses his palm down on the bulge in his jeans, desperate to soothe the ache that’s done nothing but grow the longer he watches the two of them together. 

Noah can hear the pings of the chat going off, the clinking noises of the money coming in, but he can’t bring himself to look away, especially not when Nick slides a finger into her. She gasps, her hips already canting up in search of more. 

“Do you want another?” Nick asks into her pussy, not even bothering to raise his head for her answer. Holly mumbles something unintelligible, and he wonders if it’s part of some sort of shorthand they’ve developed because Nick just nods and slides another finger in right along the first, spreading his free hand across the expanse of her lower belly.

“Some people don’t need or want penetration with oral, it all depends on your partner's preference.” Nick’s voice is low, strained, as if it's taking all he has to speak when he would just rather keep his mouth on her. “But Holly does… and see my other hand up here?” His fingers drum on her stomach. “She really enjoys it when I put a little pressure right here while I got my fingers inside her.” He pushes his hand down slightly, pulling a sharp cry from the woman beneath him.

Noah has to readjust, leaning forward so he can watch as Nick presses open-mouthed kisses against her folds before he sucks her clit into his mouth. One of Holly’s hands digs into his friend’s hair, holding him to her while she rolls her hips against his face, muttering fuck fuck fuck fuck before she cuts off with a strangled moan as her back bows and she cums on Nick’s fingers. Nick groans against her mound and he keeps going, fucking her through the aftershocks until she’s tugging his hair and gasping. He can smell her in the air when Nick pulls his fingers free with a curse, pushing himself up to fit his mouth to hers. 

It’s needy, the way they kiss. Holly’s legs hitch around Nick’s waist and they groan into each other's mouths when he drops his hips down to grind against her. Noah wonders if it’s always this intense between them and he can’t help but feel like an interloper here, watching as they clutch at each other. 

“I told you I was going to have a hard time keeping myself in check,” Nick mumbles when they pull apart, resting their foreheads together. “All I wanna do right now is sink myself inside you.”

“Yeah…” Holly breathes. One of her hands grips his backside, urging him to do it again, “I want it too… but… you—you can’t tell me you’re not looking forward to what’s happening next.” 

“I know… You're right.” He kisses her one more time and then he’s pushing himself away from her with a grunt. "You good to keep going?"

Holly's smile is blinding, and Nick feels that tug in his chest again, the one he usually gets whenever they're together, the one he's gotten pretty adept at ignoring lately. "I'd tell you if I wasn't." 

It takes everything in his power to leave her on the bed and trade places with Noah, but he does it nonetheless, planting himself in the chair Noah has vacated while the other man approaches the bed. He glances at the chat, curious, and what he sees makes his cheeks heat.

<Alotta2love> where do I sign up for a friendship like this?

<Amy357> are we sure they’re just friends $10 says they start dating soon if they’re not already.

<Sherry_Bomb29> I couldn’t care less, as long as they do this every once in a while.

<Sherry_Bomb29> I haven’t been this turned on in ages and they’re not even done.

Nick shakes his head. That’s enough of the chat for him, he decides, choosing to give his attention to Noah and Holly instead.

~~

Noah's no stranger to sex, to casual hookups with no strings attached. Yet his hands twitch against her thighs when he fits himself between them, like he doesn't know where to start… God, she's beautiful, smiling up at him all loose-limbed and relaxed from the orgasm Nick gave her. It's almost overwhelming how much he just wants her. Fuck, he wants it all. 

"Whatcha thinking about?" 

His face heats.. “I uh—I just don’t quite know where I want to start.” He runs his hands up her thighs, letting them continue their way up her body, and he enjoys the way her breath hitches when he rubs his thumbs over the hardened peaks of her nipples showing through the thin material of her dress. 

Her mouth opens, but Nick cuts in before she can say anything. "You're going to need to work her up again. What better way to start by kissing her?”

Holly rolls her eyes, raising herself on her elbows, and tilting her head to the side as she looks behind him. "I'm sorry," she replies, "are you the one driving here? Because I'm pretty sure it's just me and Noah on this bed."

He follows her gaze to see Nick put his hands up in mock surrender. “Sorry… I’ll stop… Just thought I’d help you out a little.” 

Judging by that smirk on his face, Nick’s not sorry at all, and Noah’s sure this isn’t the last time he’s going to be helpful. But he turns back to Holly, tipping her attention to him with a finger under her chin. “Is that where I should start, huh? Want me to kiss you?”

She bites her lip, nodding her head, and fuck, he can’t wait to nip at it. “Let me hear you say it, Holly.”

“Yes.”

He’s vaguely aware of Nick saying something to the stream about the importance of consent, but he’s too busy sliding his fingers through the dark waves of her hair, cupping the back of her head and pressing his lips to hers to fully pay attention. The first touch is soft, a little shy, but it quickly turns heated quickly when he feels her tongue sneak out to tease the seam of his lips. Noah groans, nipping at her bottom lip before opening his mouth to let it in to curl against his. He cups a breast, thumbing the nipple as he tightens his grip on her hair, lightly tugging her head back to grant his mouth access to the skin of her throat. 

She fists her hands in his shirt as he nips and sucks his way down to her chest, where he can push a triangle cup out of the way so he can suck her nipple into his mouth. He remembers what Nick said about her liking a little sting, so he scrapes his teeth across the hardened bud and Noah can’t help but smile against her when he’s rewarded with a soft cry as she tries to grind her hips against his.

“Did you use your teeth? She really likes it when you use your teeth.” Nick cuts in again, causing Noah to roll his eyes before he pulls off her tit to level his friend with a look.

His eyes cut to the chat, and he almost wants to laugh.

<HannieBanannie> omg is someone jealous?? 

“Nah.” Noah answers, “he just wants to show off when he should be narrating for all you fine folks. Now,” he glances at Nick, “are you gonna let me get her off or not?”

He doesn’t wait for Nick to answer, turning back to Holly without another word. With new confidence, he caresses her thighs teasingly. One of his hands follows an invisible path to her center, while the other settles at the base of her throat. Her pupils expand and she tips her head back, baring her neck for him once more. 

“You can choke me, if you want.” She murmurs, biting her lip again when he teases her folds with his thumb.

“Yeah?” he asks, enjoying her whimper when he pushes a finger into her. “Is that something you like?” 

“Y—yeah… I do.” Holly stutters when he adds a second digit. 

“Hm. Okay, then.” Noah nods, allowing his fingers to flex slowly around her neck as he lazily fucks her with his fingers. She’s so soft inside, so wet, and god, the sound she makes when he curls his fingers drives him insane. 

She whines when he relaxes his hold on her throat, “You can handle me a little harder than that… I’m not made of glass.”

“Oh, I can tell.” His mouth pulls into a smirk as he squeezes her neck again, lowering his face to hers. “And that’s good… Only a tough girl could handle what I wanna do to you,” he whispers with satisfaction curling in his gut when he feels her juices drip down his fingers, “and some day, we’re gonna see just how much you can take—open up.”

Noah taps her lips with wet fingers, groaning when she opens her mouth to let the digits glide along her tongue, eyes zeroing on the way her cheeks hollow as she licks and sucks every bit of herself from his skin until he can’t take it anymore. Fuck, he thinks, he could play with her for hours without getting bored.  

He squeezes tight around her throat one last time, pressing his mouth to hers briefly, letting his tongue drag across her parted lips before he pulls away; shuffling back until he finds himself face to face with her cunt. She’s so wet, her folds glisten with slick gathering around the edges of her hole and Noah wants nothing more than to drown in it. 

“Would you want to try something?” He asks, abruptly pushing himself up to look at her. 

Holly laughs, exasperated, “as long as it finally gets your mouth on me, I’m down for anything.” 

“Will you sit on my face?”

~~

“C’mere.” 

Noah’s voice is soft as he settles on his back, tapping his chest as if to show her where she needs to go. She bites at her bottom lip, and tries to focus on the man below her, not Nick, or the camera and the laptop where she’d be able to see herself and what everybody watching is saying. His hands are comforting where they rest on her thighs as she straddles his head, slowly lowering her pussy to his mouth. The first touch of his tongue earns him a soft moan as her mouth falls open and one of her hands weaves into his hair. Her hips rock on their own accord before she can think to stop and Noah groans, pulling her up minutely to utter, “That’s it, ride my fucking face.” 

Holly nods, gasping when his hands dig into her thighs to pull her to him once again, but she does as he asked; planting her knees beside his head, she tightens her grasp on his hair as she grinds on his tongue. Everything else fades as she loses herself in the feel of Noah’s mouth against her, her head falling back when she takes one of her nipples between her thumb and forefinger, pinching and rolling the sensitive flesh until she’s whimpering. 

“Holly, look at me.” 

There’s no room for embarrassment as arousal floods her gut when she immediately follows Nick's request. He looks wrecked and Holly swears she can feel his desire across the small distance separating them. It heats her blood, adding to the ecstasy flowing through her when Noah slides three fingers into her without warning and she can’t look away, doesn’t dare to, as her orgasm takes hold. She cums with a curse, muttering Noah’s name in a choked gasp as she rides the wave out on his fingers and tongue. 

~~

He feels scattered, frayed. Out of all the ways he and Holly have fooled around, they’ve never done that, but after watching how the pleasure played across her face as she rode Noah’s face, he’ll be remedying that the next chance he gets. 

The chat has been long abandoned; he stopped keeping track the second Holly started whimpering. His entire brain went offline, his head empty except for one thing and one thing only: want. Even now he has a hard time dragging his attention away from the two on the bed, as Noah finally releases his iron grip and she collapses beside him. Nick watches his friend turn to press a kiss to Holly’s thigh, saying something about how he could have kept going if she would have just let him. He clears his throat, attempting to pull himself together so he can address those watching.

<Amy357> fuck that was hot

<Amy357> who knew he had a control thing

<Hannie_Banannie> did you see the way she immediately looked at him?

<Hannie_Banannie> i’m gonna need new batteries after this

<Alotta2love> I don’t even care that he stopped talking 

<Alotta2love> i haven’t came that hard in ages

Nick coughs. He’s not in the mood for his usual spiel tonight, desperate as he is to get his hands on Noah and Holly. He keeps it quick and simple, and if anything he can make up for it next time, but for now…

“Sorry I lost track there, but, uhm, thanks for hanging with us tonight and, uh, make sure to check your emails for info about next time,” then without another glance at the stream, the chat, any of it, he’s pressing the little ‘x’ in the left-hand corner.

The stream is barely closed before he slams the laptop shut, and he turns around just in time to see Holly and Noah crash together in a heated kiss. She tugs at his jeans just as he pulls off his shirt and once it's gone, he's helping her shove the denim down just enough for him to fit his cock inside her. 

She cries out when he pushes his way inside, pulling away from Noah’s mouth to briefly meet Nick’s eyes over his shoulder before her lids flutter closed as Noah pulls his hips back, only to thrust into her sharply. They both groan as he finds his rhythm and the sound cuts Nick straight to the core. It spurs him into action, and his shirt finds the floor quickly, followed by his pants and underwear. 

“Couldn’t wait for me, huh?” He asks as he crosses to the bed, kneeling in the space beside her head.

“Y—you snooze, you lose,” Holly stutters. “But—oh fuck—you’re free to join… any… time.”

“Shit.” Noah makes a frustrated noise, and his hips pause mid-thrust before he pulls out of her completely. “I, uh, I need a second…” he pants, resting his forehead on her shoulder, “god, how do you feel so good?” 

“Probably… the same way… you do?” Holly replies with a breathless smile, tangling her fingers in his hair to scratch at his scalp. 

It's not jealousy that fills him as he witnesses the tender moment, it's something soft. Something that heats his insides in an entirely different way than the need coursing through him, and when Noah steps away to finish kicking off his pants, he takes his opportunity to join: asking Holly to sit up so he can slide himself between her and the headboard.

“I think you’re a little overdressed,” he says, reaching for the buckle of her harness. “How about we fix that?” Holly nods, turning her head to fit her mouth to his as he pulls the small strip of leather free from its buckle, sliding the straps down her arms before helping Noah with her dress. Her bare back is warm when she rests against his chest, the skin of her belly soft under his fingers where he touches her as Noah guides himself back inside her with a groan. 

Her lower back rubs against his cock with every thrust of Noah’s hips, and Nick can’t find himself to care about the smear of precum that’s spreading on her skin as she tries to match Noah’s rhythm. It’s almost enough to send him over the edge, but then she arches against him, back bowing upwards, one of her hands reaches behind her to grasp his head, the other clutching Noah close as she writhes between them, mouth open in a silent cry.

“Shit shit shit,” Noah curses, “god that’s good. Sooo fucking good. I’m gonna—can I??”

Holly nods, swallowing thickly before uttering a hoarse, please. Almost immediately, Noah’s thrusts stutter. Cupping a hand behind Holly’s head, he pulls her mouth to his, letting her swallow his whimpers as his hips finally still. 

They both groan when he pulls out, sharing one last kiss before he breaks away, leaning up into Nick’s space to press their lips together too. He tastes like Holly, but not so strongly that he doesn’t taste what’s uniquely Noah underneath. 

“Well, that’s even hotter in person.” Holly pipes up, and they pause. “Do you think I could get a longer show sometime?” 

He feels Noah’s mouth curve into a smile that matches his own as they part. “If that’s something you want, beautiful, anytime,” his eyes grow dark, a glint of mischievousness sparking to life as he tucks a piece of hair behind her ear, “but right now, I think there’s another show I really wanna see instead.”

~~

Nick’s hands grip her sides at Noah’s words, and if he thinks Holly forgot about him, he’s got another thing coming. She wasn’t lying when she said she picked her outfit for today based on Nick’s preferences; anytime Holly’s worn that dress since they’ve started hooking up, she quickly finds herself pressed against the nearest flat surface. 

“What do you say, Holls?” Nick asks quietly, and it doesn’t matter that both of them have already taken her apart. Doesn’t matter that she can feel the soreness taking root in her cunt. Because this is Nick, and Holly knows beyond a doubt that she will always want him… always. 

"Yeah… I'm good."

~~

He's learned to trust her when she says she can keep going, so he nods and taps her hip. "Okay, then… c'mon." 

It takes no time at all for her to get to her knees, maneuvering until she’s got one on either side of him, still facing Noah. Nick grips her waist with one hand while the other holds his cock steady so she can sink down onto him. He curses when he slips inside, wracking his brain for anything to distract him from the way her pussy feels around him as she takes him all in one go. She’s so wet, and it drives him crazy, knowing it's not just her, that some of it is Noah too; that he’s got both of them coating his dick, and he hopes this isn’t the last time because he doesn’t know if he’s ever felt this good. 

With an iron grip, he digs his fingers into her waist as she starts to move, thighs flexing as she rises and falls on his cock and he'll be surprised if she doesn't have bruises in the morning, but Nick knows she likes it sometimes. Enjoys having reminders of this left over on her skin, especially when it’ll be months before they see each other again. He runs his other hand up the length of her back, enjoying the way her breath hitches when he takes hold of the back of her neck. 

Nick wishes he would have asked her to turn around, so he can see her face when he rocks his hips, fucking into her with shallow thrusts, but the desperate noise Noah makes as he watches them is worth it. His balls start to tingle, the coil in his gut winding tight and he knows he’s going to lose it soon. 

“Do you—do you think you can cum again?” he bites out.

“Maybe—oh shit--” Holly cuts off with a gasp as he feels Noah’s long fingers swipe across the both of them, gathering whatever has leaked out of her and onto his cock. Nick can feel his hand work as he rubs circles around her clit, spreading their combined juices on the sensitive skin.

“What about now, Holly?” Noah asks. 

She nods. “Ye—yeah… Yeah.”

His eyes slip closed as he feels her inner walls quiver around him and he grunts, trying to hold on until she goes. 

“Yeah… yeah you can,” Noah replies, and he can hear the smile in his voice, can see the cocky smirk in his mind’s eye, “because he feels good, doesn’t he?”

Holly whimpers, the ends of her hair tickling his hand when she nods.

“Then show me… let go.”

Holly cums with a wail, strangling his cock and pulling him over the edge with her; white noise fills his ears as he lets go, spilling into the clutch of her wet heat. Wrapping his arms around her, he pulls her close as they continue to move together, grinding against each other until it becomes too much. 

“Well, fuck. That was hot.” Noah says, cutting through the post-coital silence, “Is it always like that with you two?”

Holly and Nick both laugh as she pulls off him. “I mean… Yeah?” Holly replies from where she comes to lie at his side.

“Yeah, it is.” He agrees, reaching out to slot his fingers through hers.

And later, as he watches Holly and Noah share soft smiles with each other over pizza and card games, Nick knows; it's all about the change for the three of them. 

~~

Three weeks later, Nick refunds Amy357 $10 from the last stream, along with a note: 'A bet is a bet.'

[emilykaldwen]

"Blocking isn't some personal insult. Its a method of saying; hey, we clearly shouldn't interact, so I'm gonna build this soundproof wall between us to make sure we can't."

Except that's not what the people you associate with do and encourage you and others to do by extension. I really liked your writing, but it's disappointing to see the type of people you've chosen to buddy up to, who use blocking as a way to weaponize social media and make pariahs out of certain people in the fandom who don't bow to their whims. I hope they don't burn you the way they've burned so many others, but with their track record, I'm not holding my breath.

Okay let's do this. I'm tired. I would like to go back to sleep. Get off my lawn, etc etc.

I have been dealing with anons harassing me since I started posting HotD stuff back during the Season 1 show run. I got hateful anons saying terrible things about Abby back in December. When I interacted with NONE of the people that I currently interact with today. This escalated when I properly began posting Maiden in the summer of last year, and then escalated in the fall. After receiving some truly foul anons in regards to my writing, my OC, and my work, including one telling me to kill myself, I shut anons off. Because what the actual fuck. I have been on the internet for 25 fucking years and this is the first time I have EVER dealt with such bullshit.

Before these anons ramped up, I, like many people, blocked. A lot. I blocked mostly people thirst reblogging stuff about the actors that would cross my dash or in the tags because it made me uncomfortable, I didn't want to see it. I blocked a lot of blogs that were posting these weird reader x canon character thirst lists that I just found bizarre and didn't want to see scrolling through a character tag. That, friends, is what the block button is for. I block people with takes that I disagree with as well, I'm someone whose pretty liberal with my block button. I block things I don't want to see on my dash. It's honestly as simple as that.

No one has fucking told me to block anyone. I am actually deeply fucking insulted that I, a grown ass adult who is nearly forty, needs to be told to block someone/someones when people are setting up blogs called 'ihateemilykaldwens' and trying to terrorize me, and my friends and mutuals, and then try to frame another one of my mutuals for being responsible for it in the process. I only just recently started speaking with "the individuals" I've chosen to associate with long after I have blocked the people you're saying are being bullied.

And if this is about my post the other day about the culture I see: It was never actually about anyone specific, it was genuinely trends I have seen cross my dash as well as discussions with friends in other fandoms. That's all. If someone(s) thought I was talking about them specifically: Dude, IDK what to tell you. That's a you problem.

So let's stop playing coy. I'm tired of it.

THIS. IS. A SMALL. BLOG. I do not pass a block list around and TELL people or encourage them to block them, nor have I ever have it done to me. And even IF someone said 'omg you should block all these people' uh, no? I have free will and can make my own judgements?

Anon, if this situation is upsetting to you, either come off anon in the DMs and talk to me, or you are welcome to unfollow me. I don't care, and I mean that in the nicest possible way.

Because the people I've blocked on my own make others feel the way you're claiming they make you feel.

Because we all know who everyone is talking about. And I'm done. This is 12 year old behavior and I don't interact with minors.

I'm going back to bed. Whatever is in the fucking water, I want none of it.

[doyouknowthischaracter]

RANDOM ASKS GRAB BAG

Putting a bunch of answered asks in one post so I don't spam your dashes too much. Under the cut because it's a very long post. If your ask isn't here, don't worry! The ask box is far from empty, and I'm sorta trying to group them by topic. Enjoy?

Anonymous asked: you mentioned in another ask that there were a few things you were probably going to check out from doing these polls and I was just curious which ones those are, if you don't mind sharing fjdjsj

I don't mind sharing! I had to go through the archive to remember which ones I wanted to check out, but a few of them would be The Walten Files, Red vs. Blue, The Murderbot Diaries, I Am In Eskew, and The Mistholme Museum of Mystery, Morbidity, and Mortality. Many of the characters posted here look interesting, but I'm such a slow watcher/player/reader/etc. that it'd take me decades to go through everything lol

Anonymous asked: Have you considered doing like uhhh idk how to explain properly, but statistics/data from loads of polls in a summary every so often? I've seen some poll blogs do a most known/least known type bar graph every so often. And I would be super interested in seeing this sort of thing for this blog!! It's fair enough if not though, obviously this would create a lot of extra work for you. Anyway, thanks for running this blog :-) Anonymous asked: I just asked a question about seeing the data statistics/ bar graphs - please ignore it! Just reread your pinned and realised I'd missed that bit :'). BUT, last point remains, thank you for running this blog and putting up with repetitive anons I bet aksjskdjsk

I haven't put the data in a graph yet, but if I figure out how to organize that in a way that's both comprehensible and actually tells us something new, I'll give it a try for sure. Until then, we do have the spreadsheet. And no worries, I'm glad you're enjoying the blog! :)

Anonymous asked: *sees a poll blog* "I must answer each and every poll I can"

Godspeed on your journey and remember to stay hydrated! 🫡

Anonymous asked: this is my favorite blog! Every morning I wake up and check the polls like they're the paper, just to say "I don't know them" Truely a humbling experience!

Happy to be your neighborhood paperboy!

@iceice-baeby asked: Are olyou fearing the day someone submits Solid Snake from MGS and you will choose the wrong picture Because everyone always seems to choose the wrong picture

The only difficulty will be in not using this one:

Anonymous asked: Just scrolled back through your blog up to posts from Dec 3rd and I know why those polls are closed now but I cannot describe the genuine anguish I felt seeing Mr Orange and going NO I KNOW HIM - I KNOW HIM!!!! Anyway I found this blog like ten minutes ago and I love it

Don't worry, he's A-OK! 👍

(Also, thanks! I appreciate your dedication.)

Anonymous asked: scrolling through to catch up on the characters and knowing a whole three of them was so bizarre. im not supposed to press the yes i know them button, im supposed to do my sworn duty and vote no with unending confusion. the world has been flipped on its head 😵‍💫

I bet the next 30 were characters you've never heard of, just for balance to be restored.

Anonymous asked: Whenever i misclick I feel sooooo bad like im sorry my dear friend for not recognizing you I apologize for my rudeness

No polls so far ended with only one vote difference between answers, so you don't have to feel too bad. For now. 👀

Anonymous asked: this is fun cause i’ve definitely submitted some characters but i’ve immediately forgotten who. so i’ll also be pleasantly surprised to see my beloveds on the blog.

A gift from you to you, courtesy of unreliable memory! Sweet!

Anonymous asked: Devastating. I keep missing the voting for the only characters I know.

You'll do it one day, I believe in you!!

@iceice-baeby asked: Would you consider writing in the tags if YOU know a character or not You have done it sometimes before, but I'd be curious if you do recognise some of those random niche as all hell blorbos Also I can't wait for my Blorbos turn. Because either He-and-she is gonna take most obscure place, OR I will actually find maybe more than two people, myself included, who know him-and-her and who I can ramble at for hours until they block me

Oh yeah, for sure. I didn't think anyone would be interested to know, but I can do that when I remember to!

Did your blorbo show up already?

Anonymous asked: I have been having the opposite problem of everyone else, apparently. I'll see a name and be like, "I don't know who that is". But then I see the picture and realize… Yes I do!

That's why I take the time to include fitting pictures, helps jog the memory!

Anonymous asked: I feel very superior every time I know a character most people don't

Hey, nobody likes a show-off. (<- Joking)

Anonymous asked: Wait, has Beetlejuice not been submitted?? I could've sworn I submitted the musical version! Anonymous asked: Oh wait no I didn't submit musical Beetlejuice to you, got you mixed up with @/every-character-ever-poll lol my bad

Indeed he hasn't been submitted yet, maybe next time!

@thetisming asked: sorry for saying something negative in the replies to a post someone was being a dick about jukebox musicals

No worries, but don't let it get to you. People are allowed to dislike your favorite things even without any good reason. It's a matter of taste, which is highly subjective. It's more constructive to focus your attention on people who do enjoy the same things as you!

@autism-criminal asked: What is your favorite color of the rainbow (red orange yellow green blue indigo purple) ?

Orange! 🍊 What's yours? :)

Anonymous asked: "data is not accurate" bro if ur going to a tumblr poll blog for accurate data you NEED to reassess some things asdfghjkl; anyway this blog is great thank you for running it it's a lot of fun and has resulted in some very funny interactions between me and my fiance. notably "what the fuck do you MEAN 6% of the sans undertale website doesn't know who sans undertale is" and "i'm sorry i simply don't believe that ANYONE doesn't know who DRACULA is"

Different people come here with different expectations, I suppose. Which is fine, I don't mind, but they're bound to be disappointed if they expect 100% accuracy all the time. But anyway! I'm happy to hear I can provide a new form of enrichment for you and your fiancé!

@sweetpollyolliver asked: So many manga and anime characters and I know like 1% of them 😭

I'm ngl, I'm not a big manga/anime connoisseur either, so I'm just as lost as you most of the time lol 🤝 (<- shaking hands in solidarity)

@cringelordofchaos asked: If I go insane one day I am going to try to make an English translation for Mesec Boje Purpura so everyone can know who veštica Noks is

I'm fully behind you! Keep us updated if you do.

Anonymous asked: I scroll through your blog. I don’t recognise any of these characters. ‘No,’ I click, ‘no,’ ‘no,’ ‘no.’ I am content in the darkness of the rock I live under. But, alas, all things must end. I continue my scroll, the glee of the irrelevant rampant in my veins. But what’s this? It can’t be… My shelter is cruelly ripped away and the brutal light of knowledge seeks me out like a bloodhound, it gives me no place to hide. ‘Yes,’ I sob, defeated, ‘Yes, I do know the jjba character.’

A modern-day Greek tragedy, truly 💔

Anonymous asked: was really surprised to vote and see that a character was 100% know them. then I noticed I got there early enough to be the only vote

For one shining, brilliant moment they were 100% known and surely that counts for something.

Anonymous asked: You should make up a character and make a poll for them and see how many people lie or misclick

Well....... I'm not going to comment on that. 🐰

Anonymous asked: I follow this blog and another blog that does smash or pass and occassionally I will come to one of your posts and examine the images to decide and then remember this blog's gimmick before trying to hit smash

Imagine voting smash there and then coming here to vote "I don't know them at all" on the same character. Brutal.

@ink7blot asked: *sees big naturals* I hate that. *reblogs*

A job well done, then 😌