#this is incredibly beautiful i wish i could visit someday

[weezeryuri]

it definitely does feel really, really lonely. having people who are Supposed to help you live just kind of keep you in a glass cage forever is incredibly lonely and frustrating so it's really understandable. i'm in a similarish situation so i don't really know when or how but i think maybe one day we'll both get out of our respective cages and even just like loiter somewhere together idk. i saw u said somthing ab concerts & i've really never been to any either. 1 day i hope when i get out of here and have moneys and can drive maybe we cud go to one if u wanted. even if the future is really far away, know that atleast someone is proud of u for surviving this so far & believes that one day you'll have a life more beautiful than u could ever imagine 🤎

YEAH literally. the biggest reason i’m impatient and struggling lately is how much my health has declined from living like this for so long. i desperately wish i understood why my mom procrastinates on important health and life shit for me. we’re both very mentally ill which probably explains a lot though

nearly every time i’ve had an appointment for something my mom had to drive me to, she ended up rescheduling over and over again and then forgetting, so no doctor’s visit in 2 years. it’s getting worrisome and i hope i figure something out soon before shit gets worse.

i love you and know we’ll both be happier someday but i wish i could do literally anything. i’d really enjoy going to a concert with you <:-]

[americangirlstar]

Meet Claudie - Infodump

So bc agwiki hasn’t got any real info on Claudie yet and they’ve banned me from editing, here’s a quick rundown of the info we garnered from Meet Claudie!

Date: The book takes place during the Summer. It’s not specified when, but it’s at least a month before school starts, as Claudie’s mother’s trip is for two weeks and two weeks after that is the variety show, which will still be summertime. I suspect very early summer.

Claudie info:

Claudie is a dreamer and storyteller, though she doesn’t realize the second part of herself quite yet and sees herself as someone with no talent, which makes her insecure.

Claudie often ends up daydreaming and losing her focus. She doesn’t realize until later how good she is at making up stories in her head.

She is incredibly shy around strangers and when public speaking. She hasn’t done any solo performances, mainly due to her anxiety.

She is noted to be very responsible, especially with her little brother, and never breaks a promise.

She enjoys learning about history, curious to learn about how life came to be as it was. “Besides, if you understood how life came to be, you could also imagine how it might someday be different.”

Claudie likes to read the funnies in the newspaper every morning, and visits Angelo’s Bakery every afternoon, as her dad will give her a special treat. She also likes watching the writers at the café across the street.

Claudie takes dance classes with the Harlem Angels, who dance in ballet, tap and African dance. She has poor motor skills however, and can “barely sway in time.” This embarrasses her, but she likes dancing when she’s alone or just with her family.

She also says that she’s “no singer” and sings quietly in church so nobody can hear her. However, Selma believes she has a beautiful voice.

She was born and raised entirely in Harlem. Claudie’s family lived in a cramped apartment when Claudie was “little,” but she doesn’t remember it, and only remembers Miss Amelia’s boardinghouse. Her parents sometimes talk about finding their own apartment, but Claudie likes the crowded and noisy house.

Three years before, in February, Claudie, Jody and Mama waved a flag in the Hellfighters welcome home parade, waiting for Daddy. Claudie remembers being bundled in “the prettiest blue coat.” An older white woman cried happily beside her; she also spotted Mr. Rockefeller. She finally saw Daddy with a fold metal, and Claudie called for him, though she thought he wouldn’t see her. However, when the formation broke, she ran right into her father’s arms, and felt like she was flying.

Claudie vaguely remembers people marching or fighting in the street that summer, because she couldn’t go outside to play. She didn’t realize at the time this was the Red Summer.

For her eighth birthday, Claudie got a leather-bound maroon notebook from her mother. She still hasn’t written in it.

The previous Christmas, Miss Amelia had sewn Claudie several finger puppets. Daddy made a stage out of cardboard box, and Mama used scraps of fabric to make the curtains. She uses her set to tell Jodie stories at bedtime. The three characters she has are Domino the cat, Puddles the duck, and Miss Pink the pig. Domino is a poor dancer like her. She considers the puppet show as “just a thing” she does for her brother.

Claudie’s Family:

Jody: Claudie’s little brother, who is six years old. He’s often mentioned racing his toy car. He adores Claudie’s puppet shows. He is also obsessed with the NLB. His favorite player is Joe Williams. He also idolizes Henry Johnson of the Hellfighters.

Mama: A brave and dedicated newspaper reporter for the Amsterdam News. She is always working or reading or hunting down a story. She has a beloved Underwood Typewriter. Claudie wishes she could be as passionate as her.

She likes living at the boardinghouse, as she often works late and likes knowing that someone is there to take care of her kids. She likes when her kids visit her at work, but will flip over the article she’s working on if it’s something too grown-up for them.

She was raised in Shellman, Georgia on a farm, but she came up north because she didn’t want to be a farmer and hated the way black people were treated; as such, it’s “hard for her to go back” and she is hesitant to take her kids there.

Both of Claudie’s parents are described as practical.

Daddy: An artistic baker and veteran of World War One. He works at Angelo’s Bakery. He’s famous in the neighborhood for his beautiful cakes. Every time Claudie visits the bakery (which she tries to do every afternoon), he offers her a sweet from the counter display.

He grew up in South Carolina. Daddy tells Claudie a story of the first caked he baked; he wanted to make a birthday cake for his mother, but it looked and tasted awful. He kept working on baking however, and after the war, he would bake during his insomniac episodes.

Daddy served in World War One (referred to as the “Great War” in everything but the narration, presumably so little kids don’t get confused.) He fought with the 369th Infantry Regiment, the Harlem Hellfighters. He would like the “peace and quiet” of their own apartment as he had to live in crowded barracks during WW1.

I think it’s safe to say he’s showing signs of PTSD, with insomnia and nightmares when he does manage to sleep.

Grandma: Mama’s mother in Georgia. Claudie has never met her.

Cousin Sidney: Either Mama’s cousin or nephew, I’m not sure. He’s a woodworker who lives upstate, and whenever he visits he brings Claudie and Jody a new toy.

Non-Wells Characters:

Miss Amelia: The woman who runs the boardinghouse. She is an immigrant from Port Antonio, Jamaica. She came to Harlem to visit her cousin thirty years previously, and ended up staying as she fell in love with the city. When she was young, she worked in a shop as a seamstress. She now uses her skills to mend clothes for extra money.

Dizzy Dot: Miss Amelia’s dog. She’s described as energetic.

Gwen: A watercolor artist who paints pictures of Harlem.

When Gwen was little, she used to sneak off to art museums to study paintings. Her mama gave her a watercolor set for Christmas, and that set Gwen on the painting path forever. She came to Harlem to study art, dreaming of becoming a famous painter, but the racism around her crushed her dreams.

She doesn’t care much for sweets, but still admires the decorative artwork that Claudie’s Father does in the bakery window.

Gwen doesn’t "take to” children very much, so Claudie avoids her out of politeness.

Nina: Claudie’s best friend, who loves to dance. She has a solo for the performance the Harlem Angels are practicing.

Nina hates history lessons, finding them boring. 

Nina seems to be more well-off than Claudie, and lives at Striver’s Row in her own apartment. Her place is mentioned to be “big”, and she has a pedal car. Claudie sometimes visits Nina, but feels strange and restless at how quiet her place is. Nina’s family hosts Christmas parties there.

Nina’s mother is also mentioned, making “finger sandwiches.” Nina’s father belongs to the Elks Lodge, and lets them rehearse in the lodge basement as long as they left the space as they found it. 

Porter: A musician who plays cornet in a brass quartet.

He grew up in New Orleans, “the birthplace of jazz.” He fell in love with the surprise and improvisation of jazz. He drove his cornet teacher crazy by continuously riffing off the music. 

Porter also served in WW1, playing in a band. He says the “french boys” called their horns magic. However, after the war, he returned home and was jumped by white men who didn’t like seeing him in uniform. After that, he left the city.

He acts fake-offended when Claudie compares cornet to a trumpet, telling her it’s “smaller, and the sound is warmer.” He says it’s a perfect instrument, as “you carry it in this little bitty case,” so you can take it anywhere, unlike a trombone or tuba.

Porter helped Claudie learn to balance while riding her scooter.

Selma: A glamorous and talented jazz singer. Claudie likes visiting her because Selma keeps a trunk of costumes that she lets Claudie try on, and would tell her stories about performing over the city while she shows her perfume or does her nails.

Selma grew up a preacher’s daughter in Texas, and grew up singing in the church. She learned she wanted to be a traveling performer from a vaudeville troupe that visited her town when she was “about Claudie’s age” and visited with her cousins. She was enchanted by the everyday wonder of it, “the simple beauty.” But she was most entranced by the blues singer at the end of the show, knowing that that was what she wanted to do with her life. When she finished school, she went on the road with her own traveling show. After becoming tired of living out of a trunk, she arrived at Miss Amelia’s boardinghouse intending to stay for only a few days. But she found herself home there.

Selma had taught Claudie how to tie her shoes.

Winston Martin: A boy from the South who loves to draw. He is Claudie’s friend, with dark skin and thin, wire-rimmed glasses that he always forgets to clean.

He comes from Canton, Mississippi, and was surprised by how big Harlem was. He started drawing so he could remember everything. His family moved to Harlem because his parents wanted him to have more opportunities.

Miss Zula: Claudie’s dance instructor. She is endlessly patient, and says that “There was no such thing as a bad dancer, only an unskilled one.” 

Unnamed Characters:

English Teacher: Claudie dreads when she has to read a book report in front of their class.

Synopsis

We begin with Claudie in dance class. Miss Zula is teaching them a griotic dance, with griot being a traveling poet or musician in West Africa. “A griot tells stories that keep history alive. Dance is a form of storytelling, too.” While Claudie likes the idea of telling a story in ways other than words, she’s too distracted trying to keep up with the other kids to pay attention to the story. As she watches Nina practice for her solo, she feels sad she wasn’t born with a special talent.

Claudie scooters on over to meet her dad at Angelo’s Bakery. She reads through The Brownies’ Book trying to enjoy the stories about heroes of color, but is still sad. She goes to the kitchen and asks her father if she has any special talent, and he tells her that she’s kind, smart, and a good sister and friend. This does not cheer her up. 

Claudie returns home to the boardinghouse and asks Miss Amelia about how she came to Harlem. The kitchen then “descends into its typical chaos” as the other boarders enter. Claudie’s mother is working late and misses dinner, and while Claudie understands, she misses her mom and wishes she had a normal job that would mean she could be home.

Claudie is eventually cheered up after telling Jodie a puppet story, taking comfort in the fact she’s good at making her brother happy. Mama arrives after Jodie has fallen asleep, telling her she was late because she had to interview a few more sources. She asks her mother what she’s good at, and Mama says she’s inquisitive. She then informs her daughter that she’ll be going to Georgia for two weeks, but says it’s “not time” for Claudie to go. Claudie is worried that Mama thinks she’ll get in her way.

She wakes up the next day and decides to spend the rest of her summer finding her talent. She proceeds to interview all the other boarders and ask how they’d discovered theirs. She starts with Selma, who tells her her backstory, and then teaches her the song that made her want to become a performer. Claudie then talks to Miss Amelia, who is mending a pair of trousers for extra money, which she has been doing a lot recently. She tries to teach Claudie to sew something, but Claudie is predictably bad at it. She tells her to practice, and Claudie asks how to practice something you’re not good at. Amelia says, “A lot of people quit if they aren’t good at something right away. But don’t worry about sewing the whole dress. You just start with one little button.” Claudie thinks about focusing on the smaller steps of something.

That afternoon, Claudie takes Jody to Amsterdam News headquarters to visit Mama. As the kids arrive, Mama flips over her article, and hesitantly tells Claudie that another man was lynched the day before. Claudie notes that while her mother can write any story, she most often writes the scary ones, and asks her why. Mama says that she wants to help people see what they’d rather ignore, then takes her and Jody home for dinner.

The rest of the week, Claudie tries to find her talent. She shadows Daddy at Angelo’s, but she keeps losing her focus and forgetting important steps. She follows Mama next, but while she’s fascinated by her mother’s bravery, she knows she’s too shy to do her mom’s job.

The next afternoon, Claudie visits Porter in hopes of learning to play cornet. He tries to teach her “When the Saints Come Marching In,” but she’s not great. He tells her about improvising in her music, the way she improvs her puppet shows. In the afternoon, Porter takes her and Jody to the Bronx to watch the Lincoln Giants. Claudie spots her friend Winston and sees him drawing Joe Williams, and she’s shocked by how realistic his doodle looks. He tells her that Harlem has more opportunities for black people than Canton did. Joe Williams hits a baseball high, and Jody cries that he hit it to the moon. Claudie imagines that something like that could only happen in Harlem.

Claudie awakes that night to find her father baking a crepe in the kitchen. She asks why he’s awake, and he told her he had a nightmare he was still in the war. She asks why some people were mad that the black soldiers came home, and he tells her that the white men were scared they’d think highly of themselves. The Red Summer occurred when they came home, which was disheartening for the men who thought they’d proved themselves in Europe.

In the morning, Claudie arrives downstairs to find everyone surrounding an Eviction Notice. Mama tells Claudie to take Jody to play outside with Dizzy Dot, where Claudie has to explain to him what eviction means; she had previously heard horror stories of classmates’ families receiving eviction noticies. She assures her brother everything will be fine, though she herself is afraid. That night, the boarders around the table only discuss making more money. Claudie eavesdrops, finding out that the rent was raised and they will be evicted if Miss Amelia can’t pay over a hundred dollars by the end of the month. Porter complains that black residents are given unfairly high rent. While Mama suggests talking to the Tenant Association, Papa tells Claudie that a lawyer would be more expensive than the rent. He then tells Claudie that people have started having rent parties, where they throw a party and charge people to enter. However, he doesn’t think they could throw a party big enough. The boarders all pick up extra jobs to pay rent, putting extra money in the coffee can in the kitchen, but it’s nowhere near enough.

Claudie gets ice cream with Nina and tells her about their problem. Nina suggests Claudie doing something to help, like a lemonade stand or sidewalk sale. Claudie isn’t sure what any of the boarders would be able to sell. That night, Claudie thinks about putting on a variety show as a rent party, selling tickets around the neighborhood to earn money. She thinks about organizing, as she doesn’t have a talent to put on. She would have to gather the performers, find a rehearsal space, and get word out. At daybreak, she decides to attempt it.

Claudie finds Selma at the theater and tells her about the variety show, which Selma is excited about. She asks if Claudie will perform, and Claudie, insecure and full of anxiety, doesn’t think she’d be good. Selma suggests focusing on some spot in the back instead of the large crowd, and assures her that lots of performers get stage fright. When Claudie still declines, Selma says that she can still be their director, which is a very important job.

Porter agrees to have his brass quartet perform. Claudie starts writing ideas in her notebook, before going to Miss Zula’s dance class. At the end of the class, she tells them about her variety show and Miss Zula agrees to perform and choreograph a new routine just for her, with her own solo. Claudie is ashamed at the idea of doing a solo, but Miss Zula says this thing that made me bawl my eyes out:

Miss Zula paused. “Claude,” she said, “do you like to dance?”

Claudie paused. She supposed she did, at home at least, when she knew that no one was watching. She would dance with Jody to the phonograph or stand on Daddy’s feet as he twirled her around the living room.

“I think so,” Claudie said, “But I’m not very good at it.”

Miss Zula smiled. “I did not ask if you were good at it,” she said. “I asked if you like to dance.”

Claudie nodded. Then Miss Zula patted her on the shoulder.

“You will miss the dancing,” she said, “if all you do is stare at your feet.

– Meet Claudie, Chapter 8: “Calling the Shots”, pg. 54-55.

Claudie cautiously goes to Gwen’s room. She asks her to paint a backdrop for her show. Gwen says she doesn’t know about painting backdrops and tries to close the door, but Claudie wedges her foot in the doorway. Claudie begs to see her paintings, and Gwen only lets her in after inspecting her hands and ensuring she won’t touch anything. Claudie is amazed by Gwen’s paintings, but shocked that she will sell them as they are art. Gwen compares her father’s cakes to art, and Claudie realizes that artists are not separate from other people. Gwen tries to get Claudie to understand they may not sell a lot of tickets, but Claudie says she still has to try to protect her home. Gwen carefully says she’ll paint the backdrop under one condition: that Claudie will be in the show, too. She says this is because Claudie wants to be an artist, and art is about taking risks and sharing yourself. She suggests Claudie put on a puppet performance and write a sketch for it, and Claudie agrees, though she doesn’t know what to write about.

That next afternoon, Claudie goes to the YWCA pool with Nina, then takes Dizzy Dot to the park. While Nina and Jody play with the dog, Claudie goes through The Brownies’ Book for ideas. Nina discourages her from writing about someone else, though Jody says that he’d wright about the Hellfighters, especially Henry Johnson. Claudie doesn’t like to imagine the war, however. She thinks about asking the writers at the café, but is too shy to.

The day before Mama’s trip to Georgia, Claudie has set the show date for two weeks after Mama’s return, just before rent is due. Claudie asks Gwen, who is surprised to see her, what she should write a sketch about. Gwen and her painter friends set Claudie up to paint for inspiration as Gwen details her backstory. She compliments Claudie’s painting, though Claudie hates it. Gwen assures her that it’s her first try, and the important thing with first tries is noticing and observing. She encourages Claudie to find her inspiration in something new. She wanders down the block, wanting to tell a story about her city, about the feeling she had long ago at the Hellfighters parade, “as if she were invisible yet part of a community at the same time.” She feels discouraged.

After dinner, Claudie asks her mother, who is packing for her trip, what she does when she needs to know what to write. Mama had been busy recently, writing about the NAACP’s anti-lynching campaign and tutoring children in reading and writing to earn extra cash. Mama suggests talking to someone else, who either know information she doesn’t or can help her talk through an idea to see it differently. She compares writing to a conversation, talking to the people they care about. Claudie remembers Gwen’s advice to do something new, and realizes everyone she’s talked to came to Harlem from somewhere different. Claudie begs her mom to go with her to Georgia, so that she can learn her own story.

“You said we never write alone. I think that’s true, and that each person is part of a much larger story. I want to understand my story. Until I do, I won’t be able to write a sketch and... save the boardinghouse.”

Claudie had never spoken words so true– or pushed back so firmly after her mother had told her no.

– Meet Claudie, Chapter 9: “Inspiration”, pg. 69-70.

Hesitantly, Mama agrees, which excites Claudie immensely. Mama warns her there will be different rules they have to follow, and Claudie will have to mind her completely. After talking it over with Papa, Mama gives Claudie a suitcase and Claudie excitedly packs for her own adventure. Lastly, she packs her maroon notebook, daydreaming about the stories she will write for it.

[zukkaoru]

22 for mailee zukka or sokka & katara!!!

jupiter!! hello!! this is. about half as long as it would have to be if i wanted to fully capture the feeling of this song. but hopefully it's still alright since it's already uhhh kinda long

22. sincerely me - artist vs. poet + mailee

and i wish that you could see oh, what you do to me and i hope this letter covers everything i'm yours, sincerely me

word count: 1927

Mai,

Kyoshi Island is warm this time of year, but it’s still nothing compared to Caldera City. I think you’d like it here in spring, actually. All of the flowers are blooming and the snow is melting and it’s really very beautiful. One of the other warriors taught me how to press flowers, so I’ve included some with this letter. I don’t know the meanings like you do; I just picked ones I thought looked prettiest.

A group of us are leaving for Gaoling in a few days. We’ve been trying to go on more recruitment missions, because Suki wants to create different chapters of the Kyoshi Warriors - that way we aren’t limited to helping Kyoshi Island. She has big dreams, but she’s got enough determination that I don’t doubt they’re possible to achieve.

Sokka, Katara, and Aang stopped by the island for a visit last week. It was nice to see them again even if I don’t know them very well. But seeing them reunite with Suki made me miss you even more. You should come visit when you get a chance! You can even bring Zuko if he can afford a break. I’d love to see you again!!

How is Zuko, by the way? You didn’t mention him in your last letter. Are you two still doing alright? Or do I need to catch the first boat to Caldera and kick his ass for you? Because I will.

Okay, I have to go - Tuq is calling me. I look forward to your next letter, and I’ll write again once I’ve returned from Gaoling!

Yours always,

Ty Lee

— —

Ty Lee, 

Zuko is fine, but Zuko and I aren’t great. There’s too much stress with him being Fire Lord, I think. And we’re both realizing some things that make a relationship a little complicated. It’s nothing you need to worry about, though, I promise! We’re talking through it, so no need to beat Zuko up.

Besides, I’ll do it myself if I need to.

I love the flowers; they really are quite pretty. The pink ones are plum blossoms. Those mean “resilience” and “perseverance”. The yellow ones are daffodils, which mena “respect”. And the white ones are Tsutsuji, or azaleas. The white ones specifically mean either “modesty” or “first love”. It was a nice collection, you chose well.

Kyoshi Island does sound beautiful. I’m not sure when or if I’ll be able to visit, but maybe someday. Or I guess maybe if I need some distance from Zuko. I don’t know. We’ll see what happens.

I hope you enjoyed your trip to Gaoling! Zuko says Toph is from there. They didn’t like it much, but I believe that has to do with the circumstances of their upbringing. I’m sure it’s a fine place to visit. Suki’s idea about different Kyoshi Warrior chapters sounds helpful as well. Maybe you could come recruit in Caldera City sometime.

I miss you too. I hope we can see each other again soon.

Sincerely,

Mai

— —

Mai,

Gaoling was incredible! It’s so SO cool getting to travel around the Earth Kingdom and being able to really appreciate the cultures. I’ve learned a lot since I came to Kyoshi Island and we started going out on recruitment trips.

Although I do agree: A trip to Caldera would be nice. I’d love any excuse to see you! I know we’re both busy, though.

I’m sorry to hear about the complications between you and Zuko. And I know you can kick his ass yourself, but my offer still stands if you should need it. Or, like you said, you can come visit me here to get some distance from everything.

It’s hard to believe it’s nearing a year since the end of the war and me moving to Kyoshi Island. It’s still weird not having you close by, but it’s nice we can at least write letters. It doesn’t replace seeing you face-to-face, but it helps.

Spring is making me miss you more, I think. Remember when we would try to catch falling cherry blossoms, just the two of us in your backyard? I miss being that young and carefree. I miss seeing you like that. It was the one time you would let your guard down and allow yourself to smile.

I don’t think I ever told you, but you really do have the prettiest smile.

If I can ever convince Suki to take a Kyoshi Warrior trip to the Fire Nation, I’ll be sure to let you know. But until then, I’ll miss you and I’ll keep writing.

Yours always,

Ty Lee

— —

Ty Lee,

Sorry for the long break in letters. I’ve read all three you sent, but I was having trouble writing a response. Zuko and I have officially ended things. I moved out of the palace. I’m living with Aunt Mura now and working full time in the flower shop. My mom keeps trying to convince me to move home and I’m running out of ways to politely decline the offer.

I’m sorry this letter is no good. I don’t have much else to say.

I hope I’ll see you soon. I miss you.

Sincerely,

Mai

— —

Mai,

There’s no need to apologize! I’ll treasure any letter you send regardless of how long or short it is. It’s as close as I can get to having you with me.

I’m sorry to hear about you and Zuko. :( I know I’m far away, but let me know if there’s anything I can do!

I will say, I’m glad you moved in with your aunt instead of your parents. I know you don’t want to be too mean to your mom, but you’ll be much better off staying with Mura. Hopefully your mom will back off soon and understand that you don’t want to live with her anymore without you having to tell her it isn’t good for your mental health.

I hope you’re enjoying working at the flower shop! I know you always really liked that place. I used to think it was so unlike you to be happy helping out there, but I understand better now. It’s fitting, I think. You remind me of flowers sometimes; flowers don’t always recognize their beauty and worth either. But remember that you are always worthy of love and happiness.

I hope it doesn’t sound like I’m trying to guilt you with how much I say this, but I miss you. I don’t think I’ll ever stop missing you. A summer thunderstorm rolled through last night, and I thought of us hiding under the blankets in my bedroom. I was way more scared than you were, but you hid with me anyways. I really appreciate that. I’m not scared of thunder anymore, but I wouldn’t say no to building another blanket fort hideout.

The summer sun here is hot, but the heat of Caldera was worse. Take care of yourself. Remember to drink water and don’t stay out in the sun for too long without anything to shade you. 

Yours always,

Ty Lee

— —

Ty Lee,

I miss you too, no guilt intended.

Mura and Zuko both say I should visit you. Would that be okay? You asked if there was anything you could do to help, and all I could think was that I really miss your hugs.

Sincerely,

Mai

— —

Mai,

PLEASE come visit!!! I will give you as many hugs as you want!!!!!!!

Yours always,

Ty Lee

PS: Wait, you’re still talking to Zuko? Also you don’t have to wait for another response from me before you leave Caldera. Just come. I’ll tell Suki to expect you soon. Unless you don’t want to come, in which case, you’re free to stay! But I really really would love for you to visit.

— —

Ty Lee,

Yes, Zuko and I still talk. It’s complicated.

Next week is the last week of summer, and there’s usually a rush in the shop that week, so I’ll leave at the start of the following week.

See you soon!

Yours,

Mai

— —

“This is so much better than the letters,” Ty Lee whispers, burying her face in Mai’s shoulder. She’s clinging to Mai like her life depends on it, but Mai doesn’t mind because she’s doing the same in return. And Ty Lee is right; this is far better than the letters they’ve exchanged in the past year. Mai has kept each one, safe in a box on a shelf in her room where she can reread them whenever she’s missing Ty Lee more than usual.

But Ty Lee in person is a million times better than ink and paper and even the pressed flowers.

“I missed you,” Mai says, as if that hasn’t been stated in every letter sent between them. But it’s important, and it means more than just those three words. It means I’m glad to see you again and Times may change but our friendship remains and I’m home.

It expresses the love that the two of them spent so long pushing down and ignoring, because how could they be together in a world that would lock them up for their feelings?

“I missed you too.”

The hug breaks, but Ty Lee doesn’t let go of Mai’s arms, and Mai doesn’t want her to. Mai wants her to hold on forever, never wants to be apart from her again. She wants to throw caution to the wind and beg to stay.

But she doesn’t. Not yet.

She takes a deep breath, inhaling the clean Kyoshi Island air, tinged with the first chilled breezes of autumn. She looks around to assure no one else has come outside to check on them. She never figured out, exactly, what to say now. But she knows she needs to say something.

Zuko had convinced her, actually. Mai, I know you. You won’t do this without a push, so I’m pushing you. Go to Kyoshi Island. Tell Ty Lee how you feel. I’m almost certain she feels the same.

And once Zuko had pointed out the signs, Mai couldn’t stop seeing them either. It was written between each line in every letter Ty Lee sent her. It was in the pressed flowers and the neat creases in the paper. It was in the space between every single letter.

I LOVE YOU.

“Ty Lee,” Mai whispers. She leans in slightly on instinct, desperate to be closer. They’ve been so far apart for so long and even though Ty Lee’s hands remain firmly wrapped around her arms, Mai can hardly stand the space still lingering between them. She wants to melt into Ty Lee’s body so they can never be separated again.

“Please stay,” Ty Lee says. One hand drops Mai’s arm to cup her cheek instead. “I don’t think I can bear to say goodbye again. I know I told you I didn’t want to guilt you into coming here, and I didn’t, but— I couldn’t say everything in the letters. Some things need to be said in person.”

“You did say it,” Mai assures her. “And I think I’ve always felt the same. That’s why Zuko and I never could have worked. I always— It was always you. I’ve always been yours.”

Ty Lee smiles. “Your letters said it too. I was worried I was reading them wrong.”

Mai shakes her head. “You should know no one knows me as well as you do.”

“Mai—” Ty Lee starts, then stops abruptly. Instead of saying anymore, she lifts herself onto her tiptoes, angling Mai’s face downward.

Mai takes her cue and closes the distance between them.

[laina]

goddamn the seaworld tag on this website is a WARZONE lmao i was hoping there would be someone like me who hates the parks but keeps up with the whales …. no dice tho

anyway back to Blogging i do want to visit the orlando and san diego parks also… orlando is where tilikum lived but he died in 2017, there’s 5 orcas there now including katina who birthed the original ~baby shamu~ and she’s one of 3 remaining in the parks who were captured from the wild as a baby!!!

and then i really really wanna go to san diego because my favorite orca lives there, her name is orkid she’s 35 and she’s a huge bitch!!! she has the most aggressive incidents towards a trainer on record by far 🥰 the largest male is there too, but he’s still a solid 2k pounds smaller than tilikum was which is fucking bananas.

i really really really wanna see wild orca someday though. i think they’re so beautiful. and seeing them at a seaworld park isn’t really anything like seeing them in the wild. i wish i could just spend time near them for a while. they’re smarter than people are, i really think so. their brains are more wrinkled than ours and they have a higher brain-to-body ratio than we do!!!! they have incredibly complex social systems and SO much of their behavior is socially learned …. just like people :~) they’re just so fuckinf cool i really believe they are god’s perfect creature.

i’m teaching myself to tell all the seaworld orcas apart so i can tell who’s who when i go see them :3

[punchmains]

Bookends kailua

Bookends kailua how to#

I told you this would be long.) Corner Book Store Sandpoint, Idaho With Milinda’s permission, I’m including it here in its entirety. Picking a winner was torture, but there was one letter I came back to again and again. Every space dedicated to books is heaven, and I’m so glad I was able to celebrate all of them through reading your letters! (Alicia even made a good case for Audible, her “bookstore of the mind.” YES.)ĭo you begin to see the difficulties? This is such a small sample of what I was given. Along with Diana, “ I give all my love to my local library hopefully, someday I am able to repay all that it has done for me.” YES. In the words of Isabella, “My experience with books hasn’t been all about the ones that lie permanently on my shelf.” For so many of you, your true book home, like mine, is the library. They create a community for us all where we don’t have to be alone. I heard about so many amazing booksellers who have welcomed you, embraced you, guided you to new favorites, and helped you find your tribe. Jessica, writing about her local Barnes & Noble, puts this better than I could: “ I wish I had a Meg Ryan little shop around the corner bookstore to tell you about but isn’t what makes a place special the people?”Īnd Yolanda, “I never felt alone in Barnes & Noble.” Two of you fell in love with your husbands in a Barnes & Noble! (My husband and I walked through a Borders during our first date, and that turned out pretty great, too.) Danielle, referring to her Barnes & Noble, sums it up with, “Everything is brighter and makes sense in a book store.” YES. And Bronwyn said, about Boulder Bookstore, “when it’s time to leave, it’s the saddest part of the day!” Paige made me laugh she says when one leaves McKay’s Used Books: “You come out feeling disoriented as you adjust back to reality, you spent way too much money, and wait, why is the sun-down?” And Tom made me tear up and think about my own childhood when he said, “Book King made me braver, stronger and more outgoing.” YES.Īnd it’s not just the impressive indie bookstores that can be our homes. “The peace I feel within this building is heaven on earth for an outsider and misfit like myself.” Lizbeth said her store, Golden Books, “feels like a secret.” Of her bookstore, Sophie said, “ The Hutch was a physical manifestation of my love of reading.”īriana promises this about The Iliad Bookshop: “In the words of SNL’s Stefon, this store has everything.” Sarah was sure she could “spend days, probably even years” in Mr. “ The Frugal Frigate was my first true love,” Rebekah told me. So many of the people who wrote in to this contest understand about being saved by books.Īnd then there were your relationships with the stores themselves. And then Ashleigh: “I know books save lives, because they saved mine.” You’re not alone, Ashleigh. Doris: “books have been my constant and steady friends.��� ME TOO. Felicia is 100% right that “finding the ‘perfect’ book for you is like meeting a new friend.” YES. And Aubrey, who said: “Ever since I was a little girl, one of the things I wanted most in the world was a library like the one Belle was gifted in “Beauty and the Beast.” YES. Like Molly, who said: “It’s so important to be physically surrounded by books, and to be able to peruse through them tactically.” YES. The way you describe your relationships with books had me nodding and saying, “Yes!” out loud, alone in my office. (I’ll link to the bookstores’ websites throughout if they have a website available.)Īnd those are but a fraction of the amazingness!īefore I announce the winner and share the letter I couldn’t say no to, I want to obsess a little bit more about all your letters. If you want to feel the same way about that trip, check out just a few of the bookstores I was introduced to this week: The descriptions of your bookstores made me want to tear out my hair in frustration because I can’t start a road trip right now to go visit all of these incredible places! (But someday I will, mark my words!) We are the book junkies, and we belong together. Every letter reached out to me and said: I am one of your people. If your goal was to kill me, you came close! Deciding on a winner was painful. If your goal was to make me laugh, cry, and want to hug hundreds of strangers in the middle of a global pandemic, and maybe adopt a few, then you were incredibly successful.

Bookends kailua how to#

The How to Win An Intimate Evening With Stephenie Meyer, Your Favorite Bookstore, And Twenty Of Your Friends contest is over, and can I just say:

[32ndofjanuary]

Gresgarth hall in Lancashire, home of landscape designer Arabella Lennox-Boyd

Photography by Andrew Montgomery for House & Garden

[nostalgicatsea]

Back in 2018, I won one of wistering’s @marveltrumpshate​ auctions. I had this AU in my head of T'Challa and Shuri visiting their cousin Erik in the U.S. from time to time and them growing up together, and one of the ideas I had was the trio on a cross-country road trip. 

Wistering was drawn to that idea and wanted to show them “having fun in the car with a big sprawling landscape around them, giving this sense of adventure but also lighthearted joy.” To our mutual delight, we had the same initial location in mind; we both wanted to see them in the desert (I was going through a big desert phase at the time). 

In these drawings, Erik, Shuri, and T’Challa are visiting Antelope Canyon and driving through Monument Valley, two beautiful places I hope to visit one day. The car is Erik’s; I specifically had something like this in mind for him. Wistering was enthusiastic about the many photos I sent of those places and other locations scattered across the country that I imagined them visiting after setting off from Oakland.

Originally, wistering had planned to include some more illustrations (they loved the Martin Luther King, Jr. Memorial Mural in Atlanta that I shared with them and wanted to do something with that, for instance), but as is sometimes the case, people get busy and/or move on from fandom. I’m just incredibly grateful that I got not one but two gorgeous works of art. 

I also had planned to write something as a companion to these illustrations, but it’s been so long (wistering sent me these in 2019) that I’m not sure if I’ll get around to it although I’d like to someday. For now, I’ll include the idea I sent them:

I really like the idea of Erik, Shuri, and T’Challa being in remote areas where they have no one but one another for company in the car. Sometimes they joke around and sometimes, they just revel in the quiet of it all, simply soaking in their surroundings and the peace. Long stretches of the highway where they only see mountains in the distance. The Pacific Coast Highway. Blistering but beautiful deserts. When they drive at night in the country, they see a sea of stars. Sometimes they stop at a small town and get something to eat at a local diner like burgers and fries or if they're in the South, some finger-lickin' good soul food. On a more serious note, at some point in their childhood or young adulthood, they go to a bunch of places that were important to the civil rights movement. I imagine that N'Jobu, after witnessing the systemic racism and oppression Black people face in the U.S., would make it his mission to teach his son, nephew, and niece to understand all that. He would teach them to learn from leaders, past and present. He would instill purpose in them; as part of the royal family of Wakanda, a wealthy nation with an abundance of resources, they should try to help those in need and have a responsibility to do so as they'll be the future leaders one day.

Mainly, after watching Black Panther, I wished that N’Jobu had had the opportunity to be there for his son, their family had not been estranged, and he had been able to get across to T’Chaka the importance of solidarity beyond their borders. I wished that T’Chaka and N’Jobu had been able to be open with each other and discuss how best to help because they couldn’t stand by and have Wakanda stay an isolationist country when they could help, not after what N’Jobu had witnessed and experienced. His death changed Erik’s trajectory forever, so I wanted to imagine an AU where that didn’t happen and the trio could be happy and mature as people together. They deserved that.

[nillegible]

the JGY amnesia Fic

[AN: Someday I will come up with decent titles for my fics... but not now XD I hope you like this fic, the premise is that the issue with XY and NMJ happens before JZX’s death, and so the argument and the stairs moves up in the timeline! And JGY hits his head and gets TV-show amnesia, and remembers no one, not even himself, but is otherwise his sharp, suspicious self...]

He wakes up sure that he is dying, nothing else could hurt so sharp, agonizing pain radiating out from the back of his head, stabbing sharply every time he is swung, and he forces his eyes open. The light burns, but he can make out an earth green and brown collar, and a strong jawline. He is being carried by this man.

He doesn’t know who this is, but he feels… safe. Even though every step this man takes makes his eyes water.

He blacks out.

*

His name is Jin Guangyao. It rolls smoothly off his tongue, but sits wrongly in his mind. “Temporary amnesia,” the doctor had informed him, when Jin Guangyao could not tell him the answers to any pf his questions; not his name, or the date, or where they were.

A fancy young master in white-and-gold robes, who introduces himself as Jin Zixuan, is the one who sits by his side and tells Jin Guangyao the basics of his life. There is such an obvious lack of detail that it leaves him intrigued. And Jin Zixuan looks ashamed when Jin Guangyao asked if he was Jin Zixuan’s uncle. “No, I’m your older brother,” he says. “We… we share a birthday, but you’re a day younger.”

Jin Guangyao watches him for a moment, and wonders at the source of his brother’s shame. “I’m a bastard, aren’t I?” he asks.

“My father legitimized you!” Jin Zixuan protests. “You’re my brother.”

Jin Guangyao smiles at him. This man is clearly naïve, but has no ill-intent. The man who had named Jin Guangyao Jin Guangyao, however? He is yet to ascertain that.

*

Jin Guangyao’s memory doesn’t return within the first week. With his head injury healed, though, he’s allowed to leave the infirmary which allows him to collect a lot more useful data.

There is a lot of work piled up in his room. Disorganized, as if someone had gone through it to take the important paperwork to work on while he is <infirm>. That he was assigned so much work that was non-essential makes him wonder if he was actually pretty low on the social ladder, here. He goes through all of them anyway, most of it is useful information, painting a picture of Jin sect’s activities, and the sorts of projects that they allow to drag on for weeks. Jin Guangyao has left meticulous notes in a separate notebook about how to put everything into a more sensible order. That such reworking was required

His accessories, or lack-there-of, are even more enlightening. There’s also a scholarly-sort of hat, and only a few cheap hair ribbons. Nothing at all like the intricate jade hairpins or crowns with intricate metalwork and precious stones that Jin Zixuan and Jin Zixun wore daily.

Jin Guangyao’s place here is… obvious.

He wonders who the man who had picked him up after his injury, was. No one tells him, not even Jin Zixuan, he just pats Jin Guangyao’s hand and says, “Don’t worry, you’re safe now.” The implications of that are obvious, of course, that the stranger was the one who had hurt him. And yet it’s a subject no one speaks of, of how Jin Guangyao had fallen down the thousand steps of Koi Tower, and he hadn’t asked after the first two times. He stays wary, watching everyone. Someone had tried to kill him, and he doesn’t even remember which of his acquaintances might want him dead.

*

Lan Xichen arrives two days after his release from the infirmary, Lan-Zongzhu, according to everyone else. He’s beautiful, the most beautiful person that Jin Guangyao has ever seen. Since he remembers all of a week, this doesn’t sound like a compliment, but Jin Guangyao could probably search for decades and not find anyone more beautiful. It would not be fair.

They have tea together, after Lan Xichen – “Call me er-ge, you are my sworn brother, A-Yao,” – has checked him over worriedly, and checked his meridians, and pressed his fingertips gently to the back of Jin Guangyao’s head, to where his head injury had been, and ascertained that he truly is well.

“They did not tell me you were injured,” he says. “Da-ge had to, and this is the week of new students for the summer lectures, I could not leave. Jin Zixuan promised me you were well, though,” he says. Sincerity shines through him, and Jin Guangyao wonders what on earth he, an unwelcome child in his own family, could have done to make this man care for him.

So he asks.

Lan Xichen describes a heroic young man, who gave him shelter when he needed it most, who had smiled and laughed at him, and helped him with chores he could not do, and gave him the strength to fight a war. Lan Xichen tells him that this kind young man had gone into a war that did not affect him, only to help, that he had turned spy against a raging mad man, and finally taken off his head.

“So that is why my father took me in,” says Jin Guangyao. There’s a flicker of pain on Lan Xichen’s face as Jin Guangyao tells him what he’s surmised about how he’s treated here. “Did you know?” asks Jin Guangyao.

“I suspected,” Lan Xichen says softly. “But you were too proud to tell me. You insisted you were happy here. I visited when I could, but I never… I’m so sorry.”

Jin Guangyao reaches out to pat Lan Xichen’s hand, it feels so familiar, even if Jin Guangyao can’t remember doing it before. He must have, Lan Xichen’s sad face cannot be borne. “I’m sure I didn’t want to bother you, er-ge. You’re overworking yourself even now.” The signs are there, even behind his flawless composure. “You look so tired.”

“I had to come,” says Lan Xichen. “I was so scared that you…” He trails off, then turns his hand, holding onto him tightly. “If you don’t remember your place at Koi tower, do you want to return with me until your memory recovers? We’re still reconstructing, but Cloud Rececsses is still an excellent place to ”

“This Jin Guangyao is honoured, but what if it doesn’t?” asks Jin Guangyao practically. “I can’t just leave my home like that.” More quietly, he adds, “There must have been some reason I didn’t leave before.”

“You never said, exactly, but I believe it was because of your mother,” says Lan Xichen. “She wished that you would gain your father’s recognition, and a place at Koi Tower.”

“Do you know anything about her?” Jin Guangyao is not an idiot, he knows from the snide remarks, the way that people try not to touch him that he is of low birth, that his mother’s occupation was. That. He wonders if Lan Xichen will lie to him.

“She was an educated woman,” he says. “A renowned beauty. You’ve told me that you take after her, in many ways. She was skilled in the arts. She never taught you art but she was your master in calligraphy and music. She loved you very much and wanted you to have a good education because she knew… she knew that A-Yao is so incredibly smart and destined for greater things.” He squeezes Jin Guangyao’s hand. “Her life was not easy. She suffered, but she loved you. She would be proud of you, to know how much you achieved.”

It should matter, it does matter, Jin Guangyao’s heart squeezes, but it is from sympathy for what Lan Xichen is feeling. The dark honey-gold eyes are bright with tears. Clearly Jin Guangyao had loved her very much, before. But Jin Guangyao cannot find in him any love for a woman that Jin Guangyao cannot imagine. A woman with his face, a prostitute, but educated, talented. And ambitious to have Jin Guangshan’s son.

“My father did not take her in, I gather?”

“He did not. She died of illness shortly before I met you.”

“Thank you for telling me,” says Jin Guangyao.

*

Lan Xichen stays an entire afternoon, and readies himself to leave at dusk. Jin Guangyao accompanies him to the sky-pavilion on Koi Tower that the Jin disciples use to take off from.

There’s a last nagging question that Jin Guangyao hadn’t managed to slide into the conversation, as it meandered into cultivation theory and Jin Guangyao and Lan Xichen had tried to piece out some kind of pattern in what kinds of cultivation knowledge he had retained, and what he had forgotten. It had been an interesting exercise.

“Er-ge, before you go,” says Jin Guangyao. He looks around cautiously, but no one is near enough to overhear. “You’re older than Jin Zixuan, aren’t you?” he asks, and Lan Xichen nods. “So our da-ge… you never said. Is he… did he die during the war?”

“No!” cries Lan Xichen. “A-Yao no, he’s not. He’s fine, he just could not find time to visit.”

Lie.

It’s the first time Lan Xichen has lied to him today, but Jin Guangyao is certain of it.

“No one talks about him, and I couldn’t find any letters from him. I did find a few of yours. No one even says his name. Who is he?”

“Nie Mingjue,” says Lan Xichen, sounding defeated. “Of course you would think to ask, but his name is Nie Mingjue.”

Everything falls into place. Jin Guangyao has seen some Nie disciple couriers on their way to private meetings with his father and the Jin council of elders. Hard faced and angry looking, they kept to themselves and departed the moment they could, without staying for a meal or entertainment.

“You think he pushed me down the stairs,” says Jin Guangyao.

“No,” says Lan Xichen. “We know he did. He kicked you down the stairs. He–”

“And you believe that?” asks Jin Guangyao.

“Of course I do,” says Lan Xichen. “Da-ge was the one who told me. I knew that things were difficult between the two of you, recently, but I had not imagined… It does not matter, we are looking through the records now, so that you can be free of your vows to him, and even if we can’t find something, he won’t visit Koi Tower again, Jin-zongzhu has forbidden it.”

“Oh,” says Jin Guangyao, mind whirring. “Okay then.”

“Is A-Yao afraid we’re covering something up?” asks Lan Xichen. Jin Guangyao is not sure what gave it away, he thought he’d kept his face smooth.

“Naturally I trust er-ge,” he says, smiling up at him. “I just remember him, vaguely. He picked me up. He saved me.”

It’s Jin Guangyao’s first memory, pained and fragmented though it is.

“He did take you up to the infirmary right after,” Lan Xichen agrees. He looks faintly puzzled, like he’s not sure why that matters to Jin Guangyao.

“I understand,” says Jin Guangyao. “Nie-zongzhu would of course regret his action after his moment of anger.”

“He does,” Lan Xichen assures him. “You should write to him, if you are willing to accept his apologies, but Da-ge is terribly sorry.”

“Thank you er-ge, I will,” Jin Guangyao promises. The relief on Lan Xichen’s face is too pure for this world.

He waves goodbye after Lan Xichen takes off, and steps back into the maze of Koi Tower, mulling over all the new knowledge that Lan Xichen had brought with him. He was right, he should write to Nie Mingjue.

But after some more research.

What could they have possibly quarrelled about so badly?

Jin Guangyao makes his way back to his rooms, keeping his face expressionless at the gilded opulence and overt unfriendliness of his home. He doesn’t understand his past self at all.

Why does he still live here, where he’s so clearly unwanted?

Why did he even care for the acknowledgement of Jin Guangshan, who from even just Jin Guangyao’s few interactions this week and the gossip he’s picked up, is a selfish, disgusting pervert who wouldn’t spit on Jin Guangyao if he was on fire.

Just because his mother wanted him to?

She was a good woman, he hears again, in Lan Xichen’s sincere voice. But Jin Guangyao doesn’t get it. She had to have been a fool, to believe in Jin Guangshan, or terribly cold and cruel to send him to Jin Guangshan knowing exactly what kind of derision would await him here. He is a war hero, and yet he’s treated like a servant.

Jin Guangyao is in the mood to be charitable, so he picks the former.

He still doesn’t know why he stayed.

[You can now read part 2 here!]

[dynananarmy]

REPUTATION|| Min Yoongi

Summary:

You were in the top. There was no person in the world who didn't know your name, either for your success or your reputation, believing that the only thing you should do is smile, be a good girl, don't force your opinions on people, and NOT for any reason deny the dating rumors. But then a gummy smile and a sweet accent came to change all your believe system, from a friends with benefits to falling in love, you encounter a new fear: would he love you despite your reputation

Pairings: Idol!Min Yoongi(SUGA) x singer!reader   

Warnings: distorted body image and unwarranted fear of gaining weight. Unhealthy habits like starvation, underage alcohol consuption. Mild smut and age gap (Yoongi is 25 and reader is 20) but everything is consensual). If i miss something please let me know.

Gorgeous

You should take it as a compliment That I got drunk and made fun of the way you talk You should think about the consequence Of your magnetic field being a little too strong And I got a boyfriend, he's older than us He's in the club doing, I don't know what You're so cool, it makes me hate you so much

You make me so happy, it turns back to sad, yeah There's nothing I hate more than what I can't have Guess I'll just stumble on home to my cats Alone, unless you wanna come along, oh

Anxiety was a familiar feeling, a daily occurrence even before you knew how to call it. The constant fear of making the wrong move, not filling everybody's expectations. But it never gets easier, walking a red carpet was nerve wracking at 20 like it was when you were 13, but expectations were higher, every single album need it to be different, different  sound, different style, you need it to be more mature but not to sexy because then you were to provocative for kids who follow you, but not to demure because then you are a prim. And then, you were too fat, and then too skinny, or you would have the nice flat stomach that people expect but you didn't have the hourglass figure. So everything you stand in an outfit risky enough for you, you would shake like a leaf, praying that the apple and the water that you had eaten would not somehow make you look bloated. That you contour was blended, that the powder under your eyes would not flash in camera. 

You were about to promote your second single of your album, a song who was for a ex manager and ended up seeing as a call out for war for a singer whom you were friends but ended up splitting ways when she started dating an ex boyfriend, an ex boyfriend that you don't actually love but it was still awkward going out with the new girlfriend of your ex. Your team takes it as publicity, even if there was not an actual feud, good or bad, publicity is publicity, and so the music video only seems to spark even more fire. Still you invited all of your friends, friends that you met through other friends, in fashion shows or while performing in lingerie runways, the kind of friends that you partied with in your mansion in Coney Island or the one in Malibu. But that only sends a spark of worry, appearing in a music video with models with perfect bodies only makes you even more insecure about your own, and you were scared about what people would think about it.

A tug in your arm pulled you out of the dazed of the camera's flash and your thoughts, Calum King was a producer, a handsome embodiment of masculinity, a strong build body, a short beard, barely there but enough to let you know that he was a man. He was older than you by a lot, not enough to be scandalous but enough to raise a few eyebrows.

 He smile and you copied and hold his arm to the cameras, the lady assisting the red carpet gesture you to move and once you were out of the sight of the camera you let a shaky breath a pound in the head and the emptiness of your stomach make you feel dizzy and your publicist move quickly, holding a hard candy to you.

“Are you okay?” Calum asks, still holding you, you nod immediately and put the candy in your mouth.

“I´m good, the lights make me feel light headed but nothing that a little bit of sugar does´n fix” you say tasting the candy, feeling a little bit less tired, he nods but his sight was already far away from you. 

“Baby, i´m going to say hello to a few friends, I¨ll see you in our seats, okay?” He doesn't wait for an answer, his manager following behind, you let a sigh of relief, relieved that you don't have to keep pretending anymore, Calum and you met a few months ago while visiting a friend of your to the studio, a paparazzi saw you having coffee and after that you kept seeing each other, he would be your date in events and to the world, you were official, but you didn't even be intimate,barely hold hands while walking in the streets, or kiss each other more than a few pecks when winning a prize, but even that, it felt forced. Your publicist looks away from her phone to look at you and gives you an indifferent look.

“A new korean band is in here, apparently they are very famous and are contending against you for one of the awards, maybe you should go and see them so people see that you support new talents”

Curiosity sparks within you  “Korean band, is it BTS?” you asked, sipping your water you publicist arch an eyebrow

“Yes, did you know them?” she looks rarely interested, you nod reminiscing how  a few weeks ago you had stumbled on a fan edit of you and one of the members titled “1997 golden babies” seeing the dark haired boy dancing and performing with that much passion caught your attention, looking at his name and thus his group, fascinated enough that you had expend a few hour looking at the music videos and some of their performances, a bubble of excitement grew in your stomach making you feel energized again and you started to walk knowing your publicist was going to take you to them, skipping to some people you got to the corner where a group of at least 10 men stand, you immediately felt short and tiny and intimidated but you put your confident face and wait for your publicist to talk with one of the men, who yo assume was their manager, he look surprised and his gazed fall to you where you standing sandwiched between your bodyguards, he nod and went to say something to the remaining men 7 of them wipe their heads instantly to you and you smile, you make the remaining and they scatter in formation, pushing the taller men in front, he gives you a smile and flashed with a set of dimples.

“Hii, is so nice to meet you guys” You break the ice, you scanned every single one of them, from the tall broad shoulder one to Jungkook, the one of the edit and then your eyes fall to one of them, instantly draw for the way he looks at you, like he knew something your eyes goes back to the taller guy as he start to talk.

“It's so incredible to meet, we are big fans of your music” he says, you had heard that a lot but he sound genuine and the rest of the boy nodded, your eyes went back to the guy with the feline eyes and you see something that you had seen before but rarely from another artist, admiration, but also understanding, like he understanded something and he was fascinated by it. 

“Are you performing tonight?” you asked trying to shake the feeling that he was reading you like a book he understands the language. 

“Ummm, no, not tonight, hopefully someday”  he looked a little ashamed but that only made you feel more admiration for them, they are escalating little by little.

“Id watched some of your performance” a chorus of ¨whoas¨ breaks their silence and you smile wider “You would have made us look like kids beside you, you are truly amazing” you compliment, the words flooding with ease, all of them let a ¨thank you¨ and when you meet eyes with the feline eyed boy he gives you the most beautiful and shy gummy smile, something inside you felt warm and fuzzy and you enjoy it so much that you wish it never went away. Your publicist asked for a picture and you stand with them.

The flash was quick, you changed the pose and at the same time you felt a delicate brush of fingers in your back. Tingles run down your spine and your hair stands, how was it possible that a man could make you feel that way without talking, without knowing him? You didn't even know his name, or how he was, he could be an asshole. 

The camera stop flashing and the warm fingers leave your trembling body (you didn't know if it was of starvation or the adrenaline running through your veins) You look at him, the man with the gummy smile, cat-like eyes and the rose petal lips, he bow and you did the same as a reflex, that make him smile fully and the giddy, warm feeling bubble in your stomach all the way up your chest. You broke eye contact and with warm cheeks you went to hug the taller guy hugging all of them (not without almost melting in gummy smile boy, and breathing deeply his mainly citrus smell).

Your entrance was cut out by your manager, who led you backstage and you hope you bump into them, to talk to him, to hear him and let his fingers pay with your skin, but you were immediately trap in the changing room pulling other set of clothes and when you get out your publicist was waiting with a mint and a glass of ice you chew while letting the makeup artist  retouch your makeup.

You had already stood up 5 times to receive an award and Top Social Artist was the last nomination before going to change for your performance. Sitting on the front row with Calum on your side being the perfect supporting boyfriend and with Zendaya on the other side beside her a bunch of other models friends, big names in the industry who appeared in the music video that had already premiered a few awards ago. And although you should've be worried if you would win the category you were already seeing black spots, nausea and heavy eyelids accompanying, and sitting beside with the most beautiful, tallest, slimmest, women of the moment didn't make you feel better, you could barely hear anything but the sound of blood pumping through your ears but after hearing your name and the loud cheers of your fans a smile appear in your clammy face, you wonder if you could even stand to get  the award if you win, a louder cheer broke in the arena and looking to the screen you saw the south korean band announced and when it disappears it took a few seconds for the screams to stop, the announcers opened the envelope, two seconds of silence in the speakers and then...“BTS!” You jump clapping finding strength out of nowhere and with a smile you saw the band walk in front of your eyes with wide eyes, open mouth and smiles, a single hand sticking out for you and knowing who it was you brush his hand with yours. 

Then you turn back and with a bodyguard in front and another in your heels, you walk into the main stage of the arena. 

Everything was blurry, you followed the guard into the hallway and crouched to get in the elevator, holding the mic and letting your head go over the choreography. And when the voice in your in ear says “one”you feel the lift move and stand.You felt like you were going to faint, but still make your moves as smooth as possibly, it felt like forever but when you give the final move and look at the camera you give the most convincing smile ever. Wait for the count to end and the light to ade out to let your body fall to the ground. But the light did not fade, and the camera was still on you. 

The host appeared to your side to announce that your music had already broken a record and that you had won another 2 awards. You accept the award and let the host hug you and unintentionally your body stumbles, your eyes give a turn and feel almost lost conscious.“It's okay” you said to the man and pulled out with a smile, looking to the worried crowd,”It's okay” you repeat in the mic ” I very excited, to be here and to win this awards, thank you to everybody that make this possible, my fans, my family, my team, everybody that listen my music and the art i make, thank you so much, i love you” You said, making well rehearsed words leave your mouth, you leave following the lady with the awards, numb. 

The act seemed innocent and so quickly and random that nobody should have noted, but it set something, pieces clicking in place, for you felt illicit, scandalous, it ignited something that you have never let your body cave in, lust. A sin so impure that only thinking about it makes you flustered, but it only took a couple of glances, some brushes of skin and a hug for you to continue the seduction game he started. And you wanted him to win, to ditch all the circus and let him take you to the hotel, seeing him all in black contrasting with his soft creamy skin, a fallen angel.  

Wanting to feel something, did you deserve the awards? Your music had moved so much from your original goal that  you barely felt it was good. So you didn't feel proud, and you did not feel happy, or sad, or angry. You felt hungry, and tired.

 How dare he be so cool? With the glinting earrings and the necklaces and the deep voice and side smile, a dream, you never thought he was just your type. Was it possible for you to have him? A quick internet research let you know his name, his position on the group and his age, he was a little over five years older than you, younger than your “exes” but so much different, he felt real, a real man, but at the same time he was surreal, to perfect,  to gorgeous. And you wanted to know all about him.

You sit alone in the buffet of your hotel, with other people who also went to the awards, munching on a chicken salad with some delicious sauce and bread sticks and a glass of orange juice. Your orange juice, of course, was spiked with alcohol by your manager, a way to make you last giggly and awake for the rest of the night. Feeling already full with your second plate and with already a certain amount of alcohol in your system, you felt better, enough to keep looking at the table in front of you. Where 7 boy sit holding a camera laughing at one of them knocking the glass with the camera gummy smile boy who had, just like you, been looking at you smile with you and you hold the big stack of tissues at him, he walk to you and brushing fingers he take it from your hands “thanks” he said with a deep voice, one that you had already heard in his music videos but never compared to the real thing.

It took you 30 minutes to shower, dry your hair, put light makeup and a flowy black dress, that fall above your knees, do a quick google research of what to expect at losing your virginity and chugging the mini bottle of wine of your mini fridge, cleaning all of the clothes on the bed and quickly fix it. And when you thought that he wouldn't come a knock was heard. You look for the last time in the mirror and open the door.

 And he was there, his hair now completely straight  and soft looking and his face was bare, no necklace and simple cotton shirt and black cargo pants. Like he couldn't be more gorgeous.  Oh wait, he could, looking at you with the damn smile. “Hi” you said, already losing the game “Hi”, deep voice and cute accent, you can't help but giggle, boozing  alcohol in your veins.

“Please, please come in” You open the door all the way “ I´m y/n, by the way” you said and he looks at you, “I know, I´m Yoongi” he says laughing “I know” you respondHe lifted an eyebrow “you do?” he said with a smug smile, “of course i know, i'm not that  dump to hook up with a guy i don't even know the name of” you widen your eyes and blame the alcohol by your blunt remark, but feel relieved when he laughs. He let you lead the way to the living room and when he sits on the couch he notices the object on the coffee table, an unopened copy of BTS 'latest album you had.

They said goodbye and you broke contact, gulping the last of your orange juice and immediately got replaced, you looked back at your manager and publicist, talking to their manager, using the translator that look flustered, and you knew why, after yourself had talked with your manager about your request, voice confident but cheeks flushed, your manager didn't even had to approach BTS manager before he was already on his way, at that you felt a weird feeling, a territorial frown in your eyes, but you couldn't blame him. Every celebrity you have met has done this.  A simple deal, a way for celebrities to keep their affairs as private and publicly clean, both sides agreed to keep it quiet and not slip ups. When they finally look at you, turn again to him, his manager walking to him, and slipping a black plastic card. A key to the room to one of the suites. Your suite.

“I thought you could signed for me” you explained with a shy tone “I found it on the airport bookstore and since i kinda collect music album i thought it was a nice addition” 

He grabbed it “can i open it?”  he said with the cute accent, you nod excited and he carefully start to unwrap you sit by his side to get a better look, when he finished it, he looks at you

 “it has a photocard” he explains and you giggle again at the way he pronounce the last word, feeling the warm feeling in your stomach and he send your favorite smile at you.He opens the book and stop at the page with the card stuck to it “It's random so is a surprise, go, turn it around” he gesture to the book, you grab it and turn it around,

 “Oww” you let out a disappointed sound when you look at the man that clearly wasn't your Min Yoongi, he laughs and you pout “what can i do if i want one of you?” you ask with a distressed look. He dares to look flustered and he reach to his neck and the his hair, you wanted yours in its place, you licked your lips and look at lis face, “You could buy lots of album until mine come out” hmmm

“That's a good idea” his stare became intense and his eyes darken, his tongue brushed his bottom lip and someone must move forward because your lips replaced his tongue was now kissing his lips. 

Your fingers grab his shirt while his palms was cupping your cheeks, thumb brushing against it, the darkest desires in your mind, the need to be touch to be taken care of,taking his hand in yours you put it on your thigh, where your dress had lift and he complied to your silent request, pushing the fabric up and caressing your skin, but not where you need it him.

 You lean in the couch bringing him with you, but he pull from the kiss, leaving you gasping, “are you sure?” he ask, with his soft, dark eyes, lips swollen and flushed cheeks, you nod, but he shakes his head “are you sure?” he repeats, you think for a second looking at your giddy, boozy brain, “yes, i'm sure” you said with the most confident voice you could muster, he kiss you again and then its your turn to pull away from the kiss ”wait, wait, i,  i haven't, i never have i ever before, i mean, i never had done this before” you confess and he looks at you still panting, he nods, and ask again “are you sure?” and you are.

He didn't let you lay in the couch.

He let you run your fingers through his torso and take his shirt off.

You let him pull down the strips of your dress.

He let you know how much he desires you.

You let him touch for the first time against the wall, making you see stars and blow away in a climax.

He takes to the bed, carrying like you were a leaf.

You let him stole sweet moans out of your mouth

He takes it slowly, touching skin like you were fine china.

You feel like a confident woman when you whisper “you are so gorgeous, I can say anything to your face.”

He lets a deep chuckle and gives a deep thrust making you scream of pleasure.

A mix of sloppy kisses, discreet love bites, nails against skin and pasional hip thrust between the sheets you let yourself think for a second that is not a one time thing, that euphoric feeling you were experimenting and that it was the most happy you had been in years was going to finish the moment he finish panting against your neck.

You tried to not look disappointed when he stood up and walked to the bathroom, closing your eyes, letting yourself feel the remnants of your climax.

He came back a few minutes later, cleaning between your legs and leaving a soft kiss in your thigh before slipping your underwear in its place, holding you in his arms.

You cried for the first time in front of a person. 

He tells you that he knew you were hungry, he had felt it before. Not by his own choice.

You tell him about the empty feeling in your stage while on stage.

He kisses your face while rubbing circles in your back.

  When the morning sun came up you watched his sleeping figure, his back up and belly down, face facing you and his arm around you.

You mindlessly start writing invisible letters, your name. Wishing he could be more than a stranger.

He lets you a note. His number. Breakfast. And a single pink flower and a book from the souvenir store “ The meaning of flowers”

Azalea

 The azalea is the flower that ushers in springtime in the southern United States. That’s one reason it’s so closely associated with beauty and rebirth. 

These blooms are often given as a symbolic message to, “Take care of yourself,” which is an important sentiment to extend to the bereaved.

Little-Known fact:

 Azaleas are celebrated in festivals throughout the world, especially the U.S. and Asia. In Chinese culture, the azalea is known as the “thinking of home bush” and was immortalized in the poetry of a famous poet during the Tang dynasty.

HIIIIIIIIII

SO 

I FINISH THIS CHAPTER

It took years, but my mental health has been bad lately and also was hard to write the first meeting, if it look to rushed, dont worry its kinda the point, they are not in love but definetly know that they felt something. But they dont know each other,  i like to think of them as soulmates. 

We see how she was physically and mentaly hitting rock bottom and her team is not as innocent as it look.

If i was vague about everything, when the managers were talking, they were basically negociating the one night stand, that way the public wouldnt found out. A normal ocurrence in this AU.

Everything you feel courius about, please let me know.

Thank you so much for reading, i love you

[sunflowersunshinevol6]

Just You

Pairing: Harry Styles x Reader

Warnings: fluff

Summary: Y/N is Gemma's best friend, she has known her family for years. When Harry comes home to pay a visit after tour, it's the first time the two see each other in a few years, and Harry's still got quite the crush.

You had known the Styles/Twist family for years. You and Gemma having been in the same class and becoming fast friends, you grew up with her and her brother Harry, often spending holiday with them.

It was always fun and chaotic, Gemma sometimes feeling territorial of your friendship as Harry would follow the two of you like a lost puppy sometimes. There had been quite a few arguements because of it, especially when Gemma wanted girl time and Harry wanted to hover.

"Y/N's my friend!" Gemma would pout, while you just stood there.

"She's my girlfriend!" Harry would say, crossing the room to grab your hand, never mind you were two years older than he was. You were his, in his mind.

Anne would always laugh and tell you all to play nice.

So when you looked down at your phone to see the picture of you kissing Gemma on the cheek lighting up your screen you pressed the answer button immediately.

"Hey babe!" You greet happily as you put your paintbrush down.

"How's it going Y/N? Feels like it's been ages since we last talked!" You smile, having missed your best friend's voice.

"It's going great actually! Got a couple commissions I've been working on," you were a visual artist, or at least trying to be.

"Well I've a question for ya, what are you doin' next weekend?"

"I don't think I'm doin' anything yet, wha's happenin?"

"Harry's commin' home from tour. Thought you'd like to see him."

"Harry told my mum he was gonna marry you one day." Gemma said, nose twisting up slightly as you two laid on her bed, flipping through magazines. You laugh rolling your eyes.

"He says that now. I can't wait till he gets an actual girlfriend." You smirk mischievously. "It'll be fun to tease him." Gemma laughed with you.

Harry listened, standing outside Gemma's door. He let his hands fall to his sides, looking at the floor, he could feel tears prickling his eyes and he hastily reached up to wipe them away.

He knew you were only teasing, but it still hurt. He may be eight but darn it! He knew he loved you and wanted to make you happy. Quietly he moved away from the door, picking up the valentines day card he had made for you.

"Harry doesn't know you're coming," Gemma said. You were coasting now, heading back towards Holmes Chapel, it felt good to be going home for the first time in a while.

"Why didn't you tell him?" You asked, she shrugged.

"Wanted it to be a surprise. Thought it'd be fun to tease him a bit ya know?" Gemma was always playful. You had supported Harry of course, through the X Factor, One Direction, his solo career. You followed his career and bought his music and did all you could to support him. You were incredibly proud of your dear sweet friend.

And you couldn't help the fact that your heart raced with excitement at the thought of seeing him in person again.

"How are you feeling?" You asked Harry. He swallowed hard, looking at you with wide eyes. You were all backstage st the X Factor, he was about to perform for the judges for the first time.

"'M nervous....Y/N what if they say no?" His voice shook as he spoke.

"They'll be crazy to reject you Harry. Your voice is beautiful." He felt his heart drop to his stomach at your words, his cheeks heating up.

"You really think so?" He asked, you smiled encouragingly.

"I know so." You don't know what came over you, but you leaned forward, pressing your lips to his quickly. His lips were soft and before he could kiss you back you pulled away, leaving his head spinning. "Jus' a good luck kiss." He grinned.

You were so happy when you pulled up outside of Anne's home. It felt like going to your own home as you and Gemma quickly got out of the car, deciding to leave your bags in the car until later. You followed her up the walk way towards the front door.

"'Ello?!" Gemma shouted as she opened the door, she pulled you with her, linking your arms together as you had done as children. Anne's face lit up when she saw the two of you, rushing forward to hug 'her best girls.' You loved her hugs, you always felt safe and comfortable around her.

"Y/N let me look at you." She said stepping back to examine you head to toe. "It's been to long. You know you're always welcome here. Come visit anytime darling." You grin, hugging Anne again.

"I will. I've just been busy-"

"I see you've brought the trouble maker with you." You pull away from Anne when you hear that voice, deep but warm and teasing. Harry stands in the doorway, leaning against the frame, a boyish grin on his face. He's no longer the chubby cheeked boy with a crush.

"I'm the trouble maker?" You tease, releasing Anne and letting Harry take you into his arms. He's solid, firm, his muscles flexing as he squeezes you. Your heart skips a beat when his lips brush against your ear.

"'ve missed you. How've you been?" He asked, pulling away. You immediately step back, knowing Anne and Gemma are still there, watching the two of you. What you don't see is the knowing smiles on both of their faces.

"Really good. And you've been doing phenomenally." You praise. He blushes, running his hand through his hair as he looks away from you.

"All my babies here under one roof," Anne says, wrapping her arms around the three of you. "Come on. Dinner's almost ready."

"'m gonna miss you." Harry says as you help him pack up his bedroom.

After the X Factor and the band One Direction was formed, it was decided Harry would live with his friend Louis, who was also in the band. Even though Harry was only sixteen, Anne trusted Louis. She knew he would take care of him.

"I'll miss you too." You say as you pack up some books. You don't realize Harry's behind you until you feel his hand on your arm, pulling you to your feet. You turn to see him gazing at you intensely. "Harry-"

"I know there's been...lots of rumors about me," he shifts uncomfortably, you know what he's talking about. Him being a womanizer. "I jus' wan' ya to know tha' it's always been you. Jus' you." You want to ask him what he means but before you can his hands are on your face and his lips pressed against yours. You kiss him back gently, pulling away and resting your forehead against his. You wish the moment would never end.

Later in the evening you'd stepped outside to get some air. You can't remember the last time you had this much fun. After dinner you played board games, drank some wine and caught up on each other's lives. You felt so warm and at home. You couldn't help but grin.

"Wha' are you smiling about?" You jump, grabbing your chest as you turn to see Harry joining you on the porch, he chuckles upon seeing your expression. "Sorry love, didn't mean t' scare you." You shake your head, rolling your eyes playfully.

"I'm just enjoying the night air."

"It is nice and warm out innit?"

"Mhm." You stand side by side in silence for a moment, looking up at the sky and watching the stars. You recognize the Big Dipper immediately.

"Y/N?" Harry questions, you turn your head to see him gazing at you in a way that is familiar to you. You smile softly.

"Yeah Harry?" He steps closer to you, leaning forward to brush your hair out of your face.

"Jus' want ya to know it's still you." Your eyes widen slightly at his confession. To say you were surprised was an understatement. You'd heard how smitten he was with Kendall and how in lo d he was with Camille.

"I thought you would have forgotten about me." You confess quietly. Harry places his hand on your cheek, his nose brushing gently against yours.

"Neva."

"You said her name Harry. Who the hell is Y/N." Camille yelled at him. Harry only shook his head, not exactly knowing what to do. He knew he fucked up, had been thinking of someone else while making love to her, he couldn't take it back.

"She's someone I used to know Camille. I haven't seen her in god knows how long-"

"You clearly still have feelings for her."

"Camille I do-"

"I'm leaving. You have a choice to make Harry. Get your shit together."

You were the one. He knew it the first time he met you. He'd always known it. No matter what happened or how far away from each other you were, it would always be you he came back to. He could never get enough of you.

"Can I have ya as my girlfriend now?" Harry asked, finally saying the words he'd been longing to say to her for years.

Y/N looked up at Harry through hooded lashes. Maybe this really was meant to be. You knew for sure at least that Harry was the sweetest person, and he would never hurt you.

"I think I'd like that very much." When Harry pressed his lips to yours he felt like he was in heaven.

"'m gonna marry her someday mum." Harry said to Anne as she made him lunch. She smiled at her son, setting the grilled cheese sandwhich down in front of him.

"Does Y/N know that?" She teased. Harry's crush on you was so sweet. The eight year old shook his head.

"Not yet...but someday. Just you watch."

[insomiaismygame]

🎉Congratulations for your 100 followers!🎉 Here are some flowers for you 💐. I... uhm... wanted to request something for the event. May I please get a nsfw Colt Grice x reader? Like, maybe the reader is a nurse or a warrior candidate and the two are close. And Colt has feelings for her and they both confess and it ends in a really fluffy smut ☺️. Thank you so much!

NSFW Colt Grice x Nurse!Fem! Reader

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT 18+

Gunfire and explosions echoed in the background as you run around the medical tent. Soldiers wailed in pain on flimsy cots; your colleagues ran around to tend to them. You were applying pressure to a soldier's leg when you saw Colt enter the tent. His once pristine uniform was covered in dirt and mud. His brother Falco, not too far behind him. Colt scanned the tent for you; eyes lighting up when they meet yours. Colt makes his way towards you, dragging Falco with him.

The soldier thrashed underneath you, muttering all kinds of curses. He slapped your hand away and shoved you to the ground. You rushed back up, trying to reapply pressure onto his leg, lest he bleeds out. The soldier continues to flail violently until a pair of hands pin down his shoulders. You look up to see Colt - eyebrows furrowed and teeth clenched. Falco comes up behind you, medical kit in hand, and sets it up.

“Look at your little assistant, all ready to go, ” Colt chuckles. The gleam in his hazel hues making you blush a little.

You always found your friend to be quite handsome. His light brown hair, almost golden in the sun, matched his eyes. The soft contours of his cheeks and nose made him look angelic. His kind and selfless nature only adding on to his ethereal aura. He brought you comfort in ways no one else could. He was your best friend, but you always hoped that someday he'd be your lover instead.

Falco tapped your arm, bringing you out of your thoughts. He held up a needle filled with anesthetic - you checked the dosage. You gave him an approving nod before injecting the soldier. You and Colt felt the soldier relax, both of you sighing in relief. You released your hands from his leg, gently peeling the gauze off it. Once you observed there was no bleeding Falco handed you a needle. You smiled down at him, thanking him and his brother for the help.

“What brings you both the to the tent?” You ask while you stitch up the soldier.

“Well, I wanted you to take a look at Falco's head, ” Colt scratched the back of his neck.

You turn to Falco, taking note of the bandages around his head. Having only taken notice now, you felt a pang of guilt. You should've never let the young boy help you. You carefully picked up Falco and placed him on an empty cot in the corner of the tent. Colt trailed behind you with the medical kit his brother had prepared. You quickly washed and gloved your hands. Gently, you unwrapped his head, tossing the dirty bandages on the cot.

Colt watched as you examined his brother. Your hands lightly cleaned the wound, brows creased in concentration. Locks of hair fell out from your cap and stuck to your face. Your nurse gown is covered in blood, sweat, and dirt. Disheveled yet persistent thought Colt as he took in your form. Admiring your grace and beauty while you patched up his brother. From the moment he first saw you he thought you were incredibly gorgeous. He would often visit you after a battle or help you carry supplies. You two grew close and he can't imagine a life without you. How he wished he could take you away from this war. Proclaim his love for you and enjoy life to the fullest. You called out to Colt, dragging him from his thoughts.

You told him Falco has a minor head injury but other than that he's fine. His features softened at the news giving you a small grin. You flashed him back the same grin and walked to your other patients.

--------------

The train ride back to Marley was rather joyous this time around. The sounds of soldiers' cheers and laughter could be heard two cars down. You were lying in the nurse's car, alone, everyone celebrating in the soldiers' car. You tried to finalize some documents but your mind kept wandering. Your thoughts converging on one thing, one person; Colt. You were so glad that he and his brother were safe. But you couldn't help but think about the day when that wouldn't be the case. When you wouldn't see those golden eyes look down at you. When you wouldn't see that adorable grin. The thought made your heart clench because today that was almost a reality.

You hated this war. Hated how it took everything from you, from them. You wish things were different.

The door to your car opened and you lift your head to see who it is. Your heart flutters when you see a familiar head of light brown hair. Colt stood in the doorway; a plate of food in one hand, a bottle of wine in the other. You sat up against the wall, beckoning him to come to sit with a pat. The bed dipped a little and he handed you the plate of food. The meat, bread, and potatoes steaming hot. He pulled out two forks from his pocket, handing one to you. Your fingers linger on his as you take the utensil. A tiny blush forms on his cheeks at the contact. You noticed this and felt a light giggle escape your lips.

“Have you been drinking? Your face is a little red, ” you chuckled.

“No, not yet, I was hoping we could drink together, ” Colt responded. Holding up the bottle of wine in his other hand.

“Dinner and wine? This almost feels like a date.”

You teased, grabbing the bottle from him. Reading the label while Colt moves a potato with his fork - an austere look in his eyes.

“Would it be bad if it was?”

You looked at him, observing how the blush spread to his ears. His hazel hues still carrying that same look but they also yearned for something. For you. You felt a blush form on your face at the realization.

“No. No, it wouldn't, ” you muttered. Casting your gaze down to the plate of food before you. You felt a hunger grow inside you, not for the food but him.

Silence fell between the both of you. He fiddled with the food and you with the bottle. You set the bottle on a small table at the edge of the bed. With your fork, you stab a piece of meat and shove it in your mouth. The kitchen closed hours ago - Colt made this himself. The thought made your eyes swell with fresh tears. The two of you devoured the plate of food in silence. Throwing small glances and smiles at each other between bites.

After you two had cleaned the plate you set it next to the wine. You turned to Colt and placed your hands on his face. Stroking his cheekbones with your thumbs while he closed his eyes. Bringing his hands up to cup yours, sighing at the contact.

“Colt?”

He hummed in response, opening his eyes to look at you. In them, all you could see was love and adoration. The same feelings that were reflected in your own. You leaned in and brushed your lips softly, hesitantly, against his. As you pulled away he brought your hands to his lips and peppered them with kisses.

“I've wanted to do that for so long, ” you admitted; his eyes meeting yours. A deep blush present on both of your faces.

“Same here. I've wanted to be with you for so long. I love you.”

You collided your lips with him, wrapping your arms around his neck. Melding and twisting your lips with his as he pulled you closer. You broke the kiss, panting when looked into his eyes.

“I love you too.”

Colt connected his lips with yours, brushing his tongue over your bottom lip. You opened for him letting his tongue swipe against yours. He laid you down on the bed, running his hands up your sides. Pinching the hem of your shirt between his fingers. He looked at you for approval, to which you nodded. Colt tugged your shirt up and you lifted your arms. He tossed the shirt aside and paused to admire you. The way your breasts rose and fell as you breathed mesmerized him.

“You're so beautiful.”

He said before he caresses your breasts in his hands. Bringing his mouth down to kiss and suck on the tender skin. The touch drove a shiver down your spine all while leaving you craving more. He latched his mouth on one of your nipples, tweaking the other with his fingers. His other hand was working on the buttons of his shirt. Yours we're working on the buttons of your skirt.

More articles of clothing were tossed to the side between fervent kisses. Nothing was left on either of you as you passionately kissed. Colt dragged a hand down your chest and stomach, stopping at your heat. He strokes your wet folds drawing a moan from your lips. He flicks your clit with his thumb; trailing his kisses down your neck and chest. Leaving marks in his wake while he continued to rub your folds. You were a moaning mess underneath him and if filled him with pride. He dreamed of the day when he could have you like this. He just didn't think it'd happen so soon. He propped himself up and looked down at you.

“Are you sure you want to do this? We can stop right here.”

You looked up at him with wide eyes and brought him back down for another kiss.

“Please don't stop.”

You begged between shallow breathes, making him smile. Colt pushed two fingers in and pumped them slowly. Twisting and curling them until he found your G-spot. You wrapped your legs around him while he continued his assault on it. His lips muffled your moans and cries. He felt your thighs tremble at his sides and picked up the pace. Abusing the spongy mass till he felt you release on his hand.

The look of you beneath him was a stunning sight. Your eyes clouded by lust and euphoria with a deep blush across your cheeks. Your chest heaving in the aftershocks of your orgasm. That sight alone is enough to make him cum. But he wanted to be inside you, feel you around him.

He took his hand covered in your slick and gave his length a couple of pumps. Colt positioned himself in front of your entrance, giving you a few kisses. He brushed his tip against your folds before slowly pushing in. You both gasped at the feeling, your walls clenched around him. He moaned at the feeling and pumped into you slowly. His grunts mingled with your moans and the sound of skin slapping against skin. Colt increased his pace, throwing your legs over his shoulders. The new position allowing him to shove deeper and harder into you.

“Co-colt it-its so good, ” you exclaimed between strangled moans.

“You-you feel amazing baby. Wa-want you to-to come on my cock.”

He grunted and continued to thrust into you at a bruising pace. Angling himself to hit that spongy spot in you once more. Abusing it while you cried out below him. You clawed at his back, feeling your walls clench around him. Colt groaned; his pace becoming erratic as his release neared. The knot in your stomach threatening to unravel as well.

Colt pumped into you a few more times before he felt his release wash over him. You came with him, the feeling of your releases overwhelming. A guttural moan escaped your lips, tears pricking at your eyes. He slowly thrust into you, easing you through your orgasm. Lowering his head to kiss the tears at your eyes before slipping out of you. Colt collapsed right next to, stroking your face, admiring you in the afterglow. He couldn't believe that you were his now and that he was yours. He knew moments like this were temporary, so he decided to savor it.

“I love you.”

“I love you too, Colt.”

Shit, I'm super late with this one!! I've had to work extra hours at work because we're currently understaffed. I'm so fucking tired. But I'm glad I got to finish this story!! I might be doing headcanons for a while with all the work I have.

TAGS: @pockyfairy

GIF IS NOT MINE ALL CREDIT GOES TO ITS ORIGINAL CREATOR.

[silvermoonflowers]

Swan Act I

Bucky x reader

Summary: Visiting her cousin's mansion for the summer, Y/N hopes for some peace and relaxation. Instead she discovers a secret...

Inspired by Swan Lake 

Warnings: some angst

Y/N let out a dreamy sigh as she stared out at the beautiful scenery that stood before her. A lake flowing with crystal clear water, the occasional birds hanging around and surrounded by tall trees that covered her from the dreadful sun.

This was certainly more relaxing here than the  bustling city life she was so used to.

With a giggle, Y/N settled onto the blanket that she had spread out under the giant weeping willow tree and picked up her book. But before she could start reading, she heard someone approaching her. But she already knew who the person was as she looked up and smiled at him.

“Hi Siegfried.”

“Hey cousin,” Siegfried said as he grinned back at her. “It's great that you and your family are staying here with us for the summer. It can get a bit boring in these areas, you know. It’s like nothing interesting really happens here! Where’s the adventure when you want it, huh?”

Y/N scoffed as she set the book on her lap. “‘Boring’”, huh? Then you should try living in the city. It's certainly more adventurous and hectic there. However, there isn't a lot of pretty scenery unlike here and sometimes, just living in the city can be pretty stressful.”

Siegfried put a hand to his chin as he gave thought into what Y/N had just said. She watched as various expressions formed on Siegfried’s face and she let out a giggle.

“Actually, you’re right,” Siegfried said once she put a hand to her mouth. “From what you said, I think I prefer ‘boring’ life here than city life.”

”Y/N rolled her eyes at him as he gave her a goofy grin. Then she looked at the lake. She watched as a couple of ducks flew down and landed in the water.

“But...I wish I was here instead of in the city…”

Her cousin knelt beside her and laid a hand on her shoulder. “If you want to, my parents have an extra house for you guys to stay in.”

Y/N flushed and waved a wand at her cousin. “Oh Siegfried. You’re so nice, but I couldn’t possibly do that…”

“Hey, we’re family, alright?” He said gently. “I’ll try my best to help you.”

“...Thank you so much Siegfried...I’ll think about it,” Y/N said as she smiled hesitantly at him. Siegfried patted her shoulder before he stood up and stretched his legs.

“Well, I’m off to go with my friend Benno for some archery lessons. Are you sure you don’t wanna come with us, Y/N?”

She glanced back at the shimmering lake again. Although Y/N had plenty of time to do fun things, she wanted to stay at this place for a while. It was just so peaceful to be here and she wanted to cherish this place in her heart forever.

“Nah, maybe some other time. But thanks!”

“Alright, have fun then cousin. And you remember the way back, right? This place is not that far from the mansion.”

“Of course. Have fun with Benno now!”

Y/N watched as her cousin gave her a thumbs up before disappearing into the trees. Then she flipped open her book and began to read. She soon found herself lost in a thrilling adventure of finding a secret kingdom.

                                                                      *~*~*

But her adventure was cut short when she felt like was being watched. At first, Y/N just thought it was her imagination, but the feeling didn’t go away. She frowned. Other than Benno, who was Siegfried’s neighbor, the place where they were was pretty much isolated from people. And all three of their parents were currently at a market. Thinking it was either one of them playing a prank on her, she looked up. However, she let out a gasp.

There, standing in front of her was a large white swan.

Y/N froze as she continued to stare at the swan in shock. She remembered her father showing her a painting of a swan from before. Her grandfather was the one who painted the picture and had given it to his son as a birthday gift.

“Y/N, did you know that swans symbolise beauty and elegance?”

After her father said that to her, Y/N decided to read several books about swans. She even asked the stars to grant her wish of seeing a swan someday.

And now it appeared that her wish finally came true.

Y/N’s breath hitched in her throat as the swan approached her. From the size alone, the swan appeared male. He stopped before her and looked at her rather curiously. Then, he came closer to her and did the unexpected; the swan laid his head on her shoulder. Warmth seeped onto her skin, causing her to drop her book. The thumping noise of the dropped book didn’t seem to bother the swan as he continued to lay there, as if basking in the comfort of her.

With a shaking hand, Y/N reached up and gently laid her hand on the crown of the swan’s head. The feathers were incredibly soft to the touch. She let out a hum and began to run her hand down the swan’s neck.

 Although Y/N knew the swan wouldn't understand her, she couldn’t help but say, “Hello.”

The swan looked up at her and then tilted his head in response. Y/N didn’t think it was impossible, but the gesture almost made the swan appear...human.

She quickly shook her head at that thought. No...it had to be the book getting to her head. She was reading a pretty magical adventure after all. There was no way the swan could be hiding a mystical secret. It just wasn’t possible.

A gentle nudge on her hand interrupted her thoughts. It was the swan again. She smiled at him and rubbed his head affectionately. However, she stopped when she noticed something.

The swan’s left wing appeared to be crumpled. Whether it was an accident or intentional, Y/N wasn’t sure, but when she tried to reach for the wing, the swan shied away, as if he was trying to hide his broken wing from her. Y/N felt saddened. But she wasn’t upset that the swan was backing away from her. She was upset at the fact that the swan got hurt. 

“You poor thing…”

As if understanding her words, the swan began to walk to her again. But before he got any closer, a rustling sound could be heard.

“Hey cousin, I’m back with Benno. I forgot to ask you something - “

“Whoa, is that a swan?! Y/N get outta there!”

“Benno, what are you doing!? Stop!”

Y/N turned around just in time to see Benno with his arrow aimed right at the swan. Without hesitation, she quickly stood up and jumped in front of the swan.

“W-what are you doing!” she said out as she held out her arms, making Benno nearly loosen his grip.

Siegfried snatched the arrow out of Benno’s and glared angrily at him. “Benno, what the hell was that all about?! You scared Y/N!”

His friend looked at him with shame. “I-I’m sorry. I thought the swan was going to attack her…”

Siegfried’s expression softened when he realized how harsh he was to him. He ran a hand through his hair before turning to his cousin.

“Y/N, are you okay?”

Y/N didn’t answer him at first. Instead she looked back to see if the swan was alright. But when she turned around, the swan wasn’t there anymore. She looked at the lake, but all she saw was a pair of ducks swimming around.

It was as if the swan had vanished into thin air.

With a heavy sigh, she answered, “...I’m fine, Siegfried.”

“Are you...sure? You seem…”

“...Let’s just go home,” was all she said as she picked up her book and bunched the blanket into a bundle. As she did this, she never once looked at Siegfried or Benno.

“Nice going, Benno,” Y/N heard Siegfried mutter to his friend. “Now you made her upset.”

“Siegfried,” She said calmly. 

“Y-Yes?”

“Please don’t blame Benno. He didn’t do anything wrong, alright? Let’s go, now.”

Siegfried raised an eyebrow at the unusual calm tone that Y/N was taking but he answered “Yes” before he and Benno followed her home.

                                                                        *~*~*

That night Y/N dreamed of walking at the lake again. But there was no swan waiting for her. Instead she saw a man appear from behind the weeping willow tree. A tall, handsome man with long dark hair and beautiful blue eyes. He wore elegant clothes that seemed a little too tight for him. This thought alone made heat rush to Y/N’s cheeks.  But the closer Y/N got to him, the more she noticed something about him.

His expression told nothing but sadness. That wasn’t the only thing Y/N had noticed.

His left sleeve was limp, which meant he was missing an arm, much to Y/N’s horror. What could’ve happened to him?

As if in distress, the man suddenly reached out to her. He opened his mouth, but no words came out. He tried again. Still nothing. The man’s expression now turned into that frustration. 

Soon the world around them began to blur. The man himself was beginning to disappear also. He looked at Y/N with pleading eyes. The sight of such an expression broke Y/N’s heart. She tried to run to him, but he was fading too quickly. But before he vanished completely, he mouthed two words to her. 

Help me.

[wanderingchocolateeclair]

Here she is!!! I finally got round to drawing her again and I’m actually relatively happy with how she turned out. She is one of my favourite ocs and I love her to bits - I made her almost a year ago when I was thinking about some random EctoLoader headcanons and suddenly had the urge to give them a child...and so then she was designed :D I wasn’t sure if I wanted to post my initial designs as well because I really don’t like the look of my old art but you know why not:

Please keep in mind that these are quite old and um...not that brilliant but they were my first quick sketches of her and I ended up writing a whole entire backstory for her so yeah! (Now that I look back at it I realise I didn’t make her hair poofy enough in the new drawing...also the page ripped and I was really sad about that-) anyway here’s some info about her (under the cut because it ended up a little longer than I expected):

AH I forgot to say!! There are mentions of death and severe injury and other stuff like that in the backstory so please read with caution!

Name -> Yuna Makimi

Age -> 17

Quirk -> “Adapt” - her quirk allows her to adapt certain parts of her body to suit whatever situation she is in. A main example of this would be when she creates little pads on the ends of her fingers which pick up vibrations, enabling her to “see” her surroundings a little better. However she cannot use her quirk to restore parts of her body that are lost/severely damaged (like her legs + eyes).

Occupation -> Student at UA

Current status -> Alive

Family -> Mother (deceased), Father (deceased), Powerloader (adopted dad), Ectoplasm (adopted dad)

Likes -> Dumplings, sitting in flower fields, doing literally anything with her friends + family

More info + backstory:

So, like I mentioned, I came up with her when I was thinking about EctoLoader headcanons and one of these hcs is that after Ecto loses his legs they both go round and pay visits to hospitals and other places to visit the children/patients there - and so yeah.

Yuna was part of quite the loving family, her parents were quite strict but loved her to pieces.

They weren’t the richest of people, and didn’t get along with the rest of their family for whatever reasons, but they were fine together - just the three of them.

That is until the accident that completely changed her life.

At the age of 8 she was caught up in a nasty villain attack as they were driving through the city and their car was completely destroyed. Her parents died at the scene and she was immediately whisked to hospital with very severe injuries.

She lost both her legs and almost all sight in her eyes, her parents were dead and she had nowhere to go, and at such a young age she felt so lost.

2 years passed and still nobody wanted to take her in, they said it would be “too much responsibility” to look after someone like her. And so at that point she had given up on all hope if someday being in a loving family again. Only 10 years old and her life had completely crumbled to pieces.

That is until one day PL swings by on one of his visits and meets this small child who looks as if she never smiles. He speaks to her and she slowly became less shy of this small man that sat in front of her. He decided to visit more often (he was made aware of her situation by one of the nurses that looked after her) and told Ecto all about this sweet little girl who he’d met who was in need of a better life. And over time they contemplated taking her in as their own - they weren’t sure yet but they had thought about it.

One day PL came with a surprise. He had put together a pair of prosthetic legs for her that she had mentioned to him before that she wished she had and that wasn’t all, they mentioned that this time Ecto came along too. She was absolutely overjoyed. She had heard about him and looked up to him a lot, he inspired her to keep going, even though she had lost her legs.

After discussing it with each other, they asked her whether she would be happy to come and live with them, and join a loving family once again. She was taken aback by the offer, as no one had even considered looking after for 2 whole years, but she realised that she was finally offered a normal life again and she was oh so happy with that...and so they adopted her and it was the best decision they ever made.

They helped her get used to her new home and she slowly got more and more comfortable with her new life. Ecto helped her with her therapy, guiding her when she felt lost and confused about what she’s doing. PL helped by tweaking little things about her prosthetics that could help her, and created little items to support her in her walking and her sight. They helped her discover new ways of using her quirk to allow her to be more aware of her surroundings and to help her “see” (she can’t use it to see fully, it just helps her to pinpoint the movements and positions of the objects/people around her a little better).

Soon enough, she was happier than ever, and when she was old enough she brought up her decision of wanting to go to UA. They weren’t sure whether or not she should, for her own safety, but she insisted that even with her disabilities she wanted to try her best at becoming a hero just like them in her own way...even if others believed it was barely possible. And so they allowed it. They taught there anyway so if anything were to happen they would always be close by.

She made a bunch of amazing friends at UA and learnt to handle her quirk in many different ways - expanding it to help her in various different situations. Her classmates would always be there to help her when she needed it but all believed that she was one of the strongest out of all of them - this really made her emotional because it wasn’t something that she ever expected to hear - and hearing this really made Ecto and PL happy, because they had watched as this tiny helpless girl had grown up to become strong, happy and incredibly loved.

And that’s my “little” backstory for her! Sorry its a bit sad and all that but it wouldn’t be one of my backstories if it wasn’t some form of tragic....:/ Anyway have some random headcanons for her->

She cannot ride in a car unless she is holding someone’s hand, this is pretty self-explanatory.

She loves jokes and stupid puns, they make her so incredibly happy it’s unbelievable.

She also loves flowers - they smell nice.

She isn’t entirely blind - she can just about make out shapes and moving objects but without the aid of her quirk she finds it hard to tell the difference between what might be a person and what might just be a large object.

She loves to sing and dance, and she has a beautiful voice, however she gets embarrassed if she gets caught.

She is always happy to spend any sort of time with her dads because with their jobs as heroes, free time can sometimes be very hard to come by.

Sorry how absolutely all over the place this is, I have plenty more headcanons and info about her, but I think I’ve rambled on for quite long enough now! (Plus I kinda just want to post it now because the more I look at the drawing the less I like it-)

Anyway, I hope you like her! She is one of my favourite characters that I’ve made and she makes me very happy. Hopefully, I’ll draw her some more :)

~Eclair

[princelestatdelioncourt]

Paris. How magnificent and incredible the city was. I could not look anywhere with the same expression on my face, astonished, excited, happy. It was just the second day there and me and Nicolas were still trying to find a job. We have already attended a couple operas in which I begged Nicki for us to attend. “Lestat we will run out of money if we don’t stop spending.” He said “oh but Nicki we must go, we are here now, we must and I promise I’ll work harder to make these rounds back. We will. Now let’s get dressed and go!” I replied. I had to wear his clothes and that was bittersweet. I loved to wear them, so fine, so delicate, so precious, so beautiful, so clean and his scent. But I hated I had no clothes like that and I felt like a beggar. I hated it. And I said to myself someday I will wear nice clothes and I will but nice clothes for me and Nicki and we will go to all the nicest places around Paris where no one will look at us like we do not belong there as country lords they called us.

All ready, clean and dressed for the occasion, on the way we were to the Opera and I suddenly stopped waking to what I saw. It was a normal reaction for me to do as I have never been in a big city and I was just in love with Paris. I stopped walking in front of a boulangerie stunished to what my eyes saw. Not only the smell coming from it. Smell of warm bread. Made my stomach growl. There’s I stood in front of the big glass window like a kid looking at something he wants but he can’t have. This was an expensive show and I was perfectly aware we could not afford to buy a piece of bread from there unless we sell even thing we own and that will not be good.

I was astonished looking at all these breads and pastries I never imagined in my life expected and only rich Parisians knew well. But what got my attention most was a violin made of some kind of … pastry? Dark brown and on a tray of gold with more of these dark edible textures around it. It was so beautiful. I realized then Nicki came back to my side.

“Let’s go Lestat we are going to get late” he said pulling from my arm gently.

“Look Nicki! Look at that violin made of something.. isn’t that beautiful?” I looked at that violin and then at Nicki with such enthusiasm. Nicolas looked at the violin then back at me.

“Yes it is but we can’t afford it Lestat unless we sell all our clothes and beg in from of Versailles. Now let’s go” he said again pulling from me again.

“Oh one day I will get it Nicki. One day will be ours. Whatever it’s made of and we both will eat it with the most fine wine. We will Nicki. Trust me. I will get it for you” I said as I finally moved slowly still looking at that violin then at Nicki as he pulled from me and gave me a smile and that look that I was so familiar to it when he thought I was so impossible and yet he loved me for it.

“Very well Lestat. You awoke so dreamy today. Yes one day we will buy it… after thousand hours of work. Now let’s go” he said when finally made me walk by his side.

“I am not lying Nicki. When we have money I will buy you nice things for you for us.” I said very convinced I will do so.

“Very well” Nicki said with a smile on his face. So handsome when he smiles like that now he made me want to kiss him. But I could not, not in the middle of Paris. Now when then, kissing on the street, loving another man and sin… was not so welcomed. Nicki told me just a very few hidden places around the city were the places where people could go and be open to that but not on the street unless I wanted both of us to be committed to death. That scared me but at the same time we were in Paris and I didn’t want to hold myself. We were happy now. But I obeyed him.

Anyways, I told him I would buy that violin when I had money and so I did. After I got to play Lelio more often and they paid us more I saved some money without Nicki knowing, yes he blamed me because I I never had enough money left and I had to lie to him with excuses on I spent it with wine and bread for us. I adored his cynicism.

One day after he left to violin classes I went right straight to the pâtisserie wearing Nicolas clothes because I I could not go with my old ones. Not there. I thought I had enough money and more so I would have some left for wine and when I pretended to be a rich Parisian requesting to buy that Violin the baker said the amount to pay and I almost felt myself to be swallowed by earth. I had just enough to pay for it, thank God! But I would have none left for wine or help to pay the rent. Nicki will be upset but I wanted to buy him that Violin and so I did.

Poor again but walking towards our apartment holding the wooden box with both hands now I didn’t want to trip or slip on the moody streets and destroy that! I would eat it from the ground!

Finally I arrived to our apartment and left the box on the table. Save. Now to think how to get some money back. Nicki will be gone for a few more hours. Think Lestat how I can get money fast. This is Paris sure there’s a way for that!

I went downstairs to the owner of the apartments we lived in and I asked if he needed help on swiping the front door for a few coins. He said he had a lady for it.

Out to the streets I went, thinking and the only thing I could think of it was theatre. But I could not go to Renaud’s yet it was closed. Suddenly someone called my name. LESTAT! I was surprised and that voice wasn’t Nicki. I turned around and it was a gentleman I never met before.

“Bonjour” I answered as all polite men do.

“Bonjour Monsieur. How pleasant to see you. I was fascinated by your acts last night.” He was last extremely enthusiast and he explained me what he liked but my acts and I was looking at him with a smile on my face. I was recognized in the middle of Paris and loved for my acts. That made me absolutely happy. He then asked me where I was going and ashamed I had to say I needed money. He looked at me for a brief moment.

“Come please come” he said

“Where?” I replied

“I can help you with that if that’s what you need today.” He vowed me and gestured to follow him

“And what is that? How you can help me?” I replied. Remember I was still discovering Paris and never been to visit the whole city so I was unaware of what he was offering me.

“Would you like to act this morning on a matinee act on a friends theatre down the road?” He finally said

Theatre. Act. I was good on that. “Absolutely!” I replied with a smile and regained my enthusiasm. I knew I could get money with that.

“Follow me please. It’s just down the street. My friend will be amazed to have you there Monsieur.” He said as we walked down the street .

Once we arrived we walked inside the small theatre, wasn’t like Renaud’s but could held 50 people at least. The man showed me around, the stage, the backstage where the actors were already there getting ready for the morning acts and I was introduced to them. The ladies knew about me and they were excited to have me there and be their Lelio that morning.

The man told me to what clothes to change and as I did I started to hear people arriving to the theatre. Clothes ready, some make up, ready I was. I watched the troupe doing the first acts and it was a little different to my beloved actors and actresses from my theatre but they were still good enough but not as good. It was now time to step on stage and it was so easy I enchanted everyone there. After the act people clapped without a stop and there I saw the man standing by the door for the people to throw their money into that black bag. That was their way to collect money. A thing we did not do at Renaud’s but we made people buy tickets as they walked in.

Once I was all changed and cleaned my face from that white make up, after everyone on that troupe congratulated me and were so happy to have me there and to please come back again, the actresses kissing my cheek, the man came and gave me the money inside a small velvet bag.

“Very well done Lestat. We hope you enjoyed it as well and to have you back in another time.” He said to me graciously.

“Thank you I will consider that.” I said with a smile holding that bag of money and I had no clue how much I was paid and I was hoping it was enough.

I walked to the streets of Paris right straight to our apartment. Thank God Nicki wasn’t there yet. I opened the small bag and made all the coins to fall on the table. It was enough. What a relief. Suddenly the door opened. There was Nicki. I smiled to him

“What is that?” He said leaving his violin on the bed and coming to the table where I was seated. “And that money?” He looked at me I suppose he was curious.

“ remember I told you when we had money I would buy you that violin made of whatever from that pastisseire?” I looked up at him with a big smile. He was looking at me and at the box and the money.

“Lestat!” He groaned “why you spend money on such things. We will starve. We … now we will have to sell everything.” He walked around the room not too happy. I was a little hurt but I understood and he didn’t know yet I was able to pay for it.

“Nicki calm down. I was able to pay for it and get money. We are good. We don’t need to sell anything. Now can you please come and at least open the box? I thought you would love it and eat it if you wish. I just … wanted it for you.” My voice was a little sad and broken. I felt my enthusiasm almost gone. I looked down at the box and the money on the table.

Nicki came closer quietly and opened the box. I looked up at him quietly.

“You didn’t had to Lestat” his voice was calm now and gentle. He knelt before me holding the box with the violin inside.

“I just wanted it for you and make you happy and give you nice things. A way for me to express my love and care for you. To make you happy and all you deserve. And I got money for us not to stave” I said with a soft tone. He leaned closer and kissed my lips softly, his soft lips always got into my soul and looked at me.

“Thank you. I really do. You didn’t had to buy me anything. We have each other now and that’s more than enough.” He left the box on the table and held my face with both his hands so I could look at him. “ look at me.” I did “ I love you and thank you for this is one of the most gifts I ever received. Now do you know what it’s made of?”

“No I don’t. I don’t care what it’s made of is just beautiful and is a violin. It’s beautiful like your music. Like your violin and you deserve it” I said looking into his dark eyes I loved so much and get lost on them.

“Is chocolate” he said with a smile. I have never heard that word before. I had no clue.

“And what is that?” I asked curious

“Cocoa. Only rich people here in Paris use it on very special occasions and on small amounts. It’s like a drug Lestat. It’s dry and sweet. Now I am wondering to what face the baker must have looked at you when you request to buy it” he chuckled. I let out a laugh as well remembering the bakers face. Truly he was a map.

“He had a face yes. I guess now I know why.” I was finally relaxed and I felt Nicki relaxed as well. I put my hands on his side feeling his back. “So a drug… ah Paris! You tricked me again!” I laughed. Nicki laughed.

“And the coins… where did you get them?” Nicki asked me curious.

“I worked for a few hours. I was left with nothing after I bought the violin so I had to find something quick. A man came to me and recognized me as I was walking in the streets and I went to their theatre and did a couple acts and they paid me well enough we will have for food” I simply replied .

“You are impossible Lestat.” Nicki replied with a smile “it amazes me how when you want something go for it and don’t stop until you get it and then you find solutions when things are no right. You got lucky finding that man. Went to a place you have never been. You could have been killed! You were fearless. You got the money. I don’t know what kind of light you have on you it amazes me.” Nicki said and I the. Realized he was right. I trusted and followed a man to an unknown place and I could have been killed! This is Paris!. Nicki was so right I didn’t think but to what my goal was. I’ve been always like this. Act, react. Not even thinking about all the possibilities. Yet once again I was lucky and got all I wanted and I was safe.

I didn’t know what to say to Nicki so I went back to the same sentence “I wanted it for you and to make you happy. All I wanted. I wanted it.” I said.

“And we have it now and you are safe” Nicki said still holding my face with both his hands. He lean forward and kissed me again “but we can’t eat all of that ourselves or we will end up sick.” He said standing up

“Well we can share it with the troupe or just eat it in pieces. I don’t know. I never had that…. Chocolate as you said it’s called. Or we can just leave it here and contemplate it” I said

“Lestat it will melt overtime. We can eat some and bring it to the theatre then if so” he said

“Ok. But we must try it first. I want to try it. I have never had chocolate.” I reached to the table and broke and piece of it. I put it in my mouth and allowed to open my senses to taste it. Not a few seconds later I was making faces. It was horrible dry. Like powder. It was so dry it got stuck all over my mouth. “OH MY GOD WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?!” I looked at Nicki trying to either spit that or swallow it “Nicki you said sweet, there’s no sweet on this !!!! It’s stuck!!” Nicki was laughing at me. “Stop laughing I can’t ..!!! Horrible!!” I stood up trying to find a bottle of whatever bottle of wine or water we had left. Finally found one and drank from it. Nicki was laughing so loudly o have never saw him laugh that much.

“Stop it! Don’t laugh! It was no funny!” I protested but I was about to laugh at myself just thinking how my reaction was to eating that. “Nicki why you didn’t stop me!?” I hit his leg gently with the tip of my boots.

“Well… you and your impulses. You wanted to taste it, there you have it” he continued laughing

“You should have told me it was not sweets anywhere in that. I hate chocolate that horrible. Do Parisian eat that at these special occasions? Mon dieu, what special occasions are these to be able to eat that?!” I drank more from that wine trying to get rid of that dry taste

“Lestat, chocolate is an aphrodisiac. Only to be taken in small amounts. Little tiny pieces is an elixir.” He said trying not to laugh anymore holding his stomach from all the laughs. I was looking at him with no clue what he was talking about.

“What are you taking about? Elixir on this? How? It’s dry like straw.” I looked at him feeling much better now my mouth wasn’t that dry anymore.

“Yes it is and again on small amounts and while drinking. So you got it all now Lestat. Chocolate and wine.” He left out another laugh

“What do you mean with that? I am intoxicated now?” I came closer to him and I held his wrists with my hands and pinned him against the wall playfully

“Oh so this is what it’s about?” I said with a smirk “is this what awakens? Some sexual appetite?” I smiled at him and he smiles at me

“Perhaps. But you don’t need chocolate for that” he smiles looking into my eyes. I let him go on a quick move and smiled.

“Hmmm yes true. That I blame you.” I replied and walked toward the table “look we have money for food and wine. Maybe we can celebrate this as we always do with some good food and the. Later on we both can have more of that elixir. Are you with me?” I said looking at him and grabbing all the money on the table “what do you want for dinner? Let’s make it a Nicolas night” I said playfully

Nicolas came closer and held me from behind pressing his body firmly against mine I felt like his pray now.

“It’s always your night Lestat but you very well know it ends up to be mine” he said grabbing my ass hard and letting me go with the same impulsiveness as when he grabbed me.

“I hate you” I said playfully with a smile not meaning at all that hate but it was a playful way to say I love you and with good terms. He grabbed his jacket . I collected all the money and down to the streets of Paris we went.

-

So that was the first day trying chocolate. Horrible. Dark dry chocolate.

-

// @monsieur-nicolas-de-lenfent I was just surfing online when I came across to a chocolate violin and made me write this small story. I hope I wrote Nicki right. I’m not as great as you are portraying him and maybe he would have reacted differently. I would like to know that what he would have done on this story. But they key was that Lestat wanted Nicki happy and to smile and to show love to him, buying him something special and to make Nicki feel loved :) sorry for the mistakes i wrote this on my phone :)

[omgrachwrites]

Where the People are (Prince Caspian One Shot)

Pairing: Prince Caspian x Water Nymph!Reader

Summary: Being curious is a dangerous thing, especially when you’re curious about the ones that would kill you without a second thought. (Set before Prince Caspian.)

Warnings: bit of fluff, bit of angst idk

Words: 1199

A/N: Can you guys believe I’m writing something other than marvel?! I wanted to branch out but idk if there’s even a Narnia fandom, I was watching the films the other day and it rekindled my love for Ben Barnes! Hope you guys like it, sorry its a bit different  and please let me know what you think! I love you all very much! xxx

(part two here) (part three here)

The sun was rather high in the cloudless blue sky on that midsummer day and you were still in your favourite corner of the wood, if you didn’t leave now you’d never get to the castle before nightfall. If you didn’t leave now you would be captured and most likely killed by the sons of Adam who believed it was they who truly reigned over Narnia. Raising up out of that beautiful warm pond of yours – you were a water nymph – you began your journey, you decided to walk, you could get along without being in water but you made sure to keep close to rivers and lakes.

Sneaking away was the easiest part, it was getting back that was the problem but you hadn’t been caught by your fellow Narnians yet and as long as there was life in you, you were curious. Curious about those who would kill you if given the chance, you knew your curiosity would be the death of you someday but you couldn’t help yourself. It was your curse, everybody had one. As you walked through the deep forest you were quite sure that you wouldn’t be caught, the trees no longer had their own magic, not since the Kings and Queens of old ruled over Narnia.

It seemed that you had left your home at just the right time for when you arrived outside the grounds of the castle the shining moon was just gaining height in the sky. Running through the majestic grounds there was a babbling brook that was deep enough for you to reside in, it hid you from view but it enabled you to see everything and hear too. It was amazing how far the sound travelled.  Every time you visited there was always someone on the moonlit lawn – sometimes it was the Lord and his Lady wife – and you just liked to watch them. Smiling, you got into the shimmering cool water which brought you great relief and you waited, just waited.

Tonight, an old man came striding across the lawn – you had seen him before, he was always mumbling to himself as he wrote things down in a heavy looking tome. He wasn’t alone tonight though, someone else was with him, as the pair got closer to the bank she saw that the stranger was a young man. He was the most beautiful man that you’d ever seen. His long hair blew in the gentle wind and the moonlight illuminated his face in a heavenly glow.

“So what’s next Professor? I would rather like to know more about water nymphs,” he said, his voice as smooth and dark. But it sounded soft and kind, you smiled and rested your elbow on a nearby rock and you gazed up at him.

“My dear Prince, water nymphs were dangerous but wonderful all at the same time. They were far too beautiful to exist, almost hauntingly beautiful, they had the power to ensnare men’s hearts. In the days before the Kings and Queens of old, in the time when the deep magic ruled Narnia, they were often taken into battle. One whisper of their voice could kill opponents if their masters wished it.”

You frowned, you supposed that it was a lie that humans had concocted to justify their violent behaviour towards your kind, there weren’t many water nymphs left. Well, you had heard enough and you followed the brook back to the open water and got home before the sun rose. You were determined not to go back, even if it meant not seeing that beautiful prince again. Unfortunately, your self-control was not nearly as strong as you truly hoped and a couple of nights later you were on your way back to the castle.

You returned there for weeks if only to have just a glimpse of that prince’s face. Over time, you got brave enough to approach closer, that brought you to where you were now, in a tree but still obscured from view. However, you weren’t a graceful on land as you were in the water, which was proved when you moved just an inch. You toppled out of the tree and onto the hard lawn, letting out a gasp of pain as you did so.

“By the powers! Are you quite alright?” you heard a familiar voice and saw a hand at your eye level. Sighing, you took it and allowed yourself to be pulled to your feet and you looked up at your helper. He had the most gorgeous skin, the moonlight made him look ethereal and looking into his dark eyes was like staring at the stars. It was the prince, your prince.

“Err, yes I’m fine. Thank you very much for helping me, I get clumsy,” you smiled sheepishly, feeling a strange warmth travel across your cheeks.

“I am Prince Caspian,” he bowed his head and looked over you, you couldn’t imagine how you looked with a dress made out of blue seaweed and no shoes, “who are you, and what were you doing in that tree?” he sounded amused and not in the least bit angry.

“I’m Y/N,” you tucked your hair behind your ear, you didn’t have a good answer – or lie – to explain why you were in a tree, “I must go.”

“Wait! Oh please, wait!” he called and despite yourself, you turned around, his eyes were soft and kind, it was so easy to get lost in them. He wasn’t like the others. He took your hand and kissed the top of it gently, it made you feel warm, like when the sun came through the trees of the wood and warmed the water.

It suddenly struck you, he thought that you were a human; he’d never seen a water nymph before. Maybe coming back was a mistake, if he knew who – what – you were he’d draw his sword. That thought made you incredibly sad.

“Forgive me, your Highness,” you murmured and you did what you were best at, you ran away through the woods. That day you didn’t return home unscathed.

“You must stop doing this; you’re putting all of us in danger. Those who rule over our enchanted land believe we’re extinct and it must stay that way,” your friend said, he sounded stern.

“Trumpkin,” you sighed and turned around, looking at the dwarf, “there was this prince and he-“

“Are you about to tell me that he’s not like the rest of the humans? Don’t be fooled, they’re all the same and without Aslan, we cannot face them.”

“You don’t even know him,” your eyes welled up with tears, that was still a strange sensation. Living underwater for the better part of your life you weren’t used to crying tears when you were sad.

“Neither do you,” it was the truth but it hurt all the same.

“You mustn’t worry, I will not be seeing him again, please Trumpkin, please don’t tell anybody,” when Trumpkin nodded you slipped back into the waters of your pond, dreaming about the day when you could see Caspian again. You supposed that it couldn’t be too soon, you didn’t want to arouse suspicion. But, you had a plan.

[meigh-day]

Breathing Lilies (Tendou x Reader) - Part 4

Part 4!  I initially thought this would just be four or 5 parts....but it might be closer to 7 or 8...maybe more at this rate. Anywho hope you enjoy! :)

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Title: Breathing Lilies

Characters: Tendou/Ushijima/OC Students/Reader

Includes: Hanahaki Disease, Angst

Status: Complete

Word Count: 1.4k

Previous Next

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The two of you sat in relative silence, your sobs had died down to hiccuped whimpers. He simply held you close, unconcerned with the growing dampness on the front of his shirts from where your tears had fallen.

When you had calmed, tears sliding slowly from your eyes, the two of you talked. Wakatoshi thought it would be best to just tell Tendou but you rejected the notion immediately. There was no way he could know. You felt sad and pathetic in the wake of all this and you just didn't want him to know how you had hurt yourself by loving him.

"Please 'Toshi... Promise me you won't tell anyone...but especially Satori."

For a brief moment it looked like he wanted to push the matter further, to force the truth out of you. Instead he inclined his head and conceded, a little.

"Fine. I promise. I won't tell anyone, for now." It wasn't exactly a threat, more of a kind warning. He would keep it to himself but he was going to watch after you and if he felt the only choice was you or your secret, he was going to choose you. Ushijima wasn't the kind of man to really share his feelings freely but he cared a great deal for you and as he left your room he felt unsettled.

Hanahaki disease. You knew about, heard it talked about by friends and even did some curiosity reading on it. You never fathomed you would someday be the one fighting for air, a constant ache in your chest, roots and flowers growing in your lungs. How ironic they had taken the form of red spider lilies. They had always been one of your favorite flowers, despite their somewhat morbid history. When you met Satori during first year, you couldn't help but be reminded of the flowers. They were almost as beautiful as he was in your eyes and nearly the same share of red as his pretty hair. Like him, the flowers seemed misunderstood but when you really looked and took the time to appreciate them, you would see what a gem they were.

Now something you did not expect was for the flowers to take on aspects of the real plant. Red Spider lilies are poisonous. In a normal bulb the toxicity levels are too low to cause any problems if ingested but you have them growing inside of you. So when the nausea started you assumed it was from all the stress you were under. When you started vomiting up the little bit of food you could manage, your mind tried to chalk it up to stress. You had no idea that the pretty flowers whose petals you kept hacking up were also leaking poison into your body. You felt cold all the time, so, to try and combat the incessant shivering, you started wearing thick sweaters and long socks constantly when you weren't huddled under a pile of blankets in your room.

It had been a couple of days since Ushijima had paid a visit to your room and you now found yourself heading in the direction of the library. It had become your little hideaway where you spent most of your lunches these days. However, your attention diverted as you are greeted by the voice of your favorite red-head.

"Hey stranger." Tendou stood before you, a wide grin on his lips as he stared down at you. "So I know you've been super busy lately buuuuuuuut I was thinking.....you...me..." As he spoke, going further into the details of what more or less sounded like a movie and cuddle date, his body moving closer to you, his warm hand reaching out and cupping your cheek, looking at you like you were the only thing in this whole world that mattered to him, it made your heart race. You wanted to scream, you wanted to accept the invitation and, toi be honest, the temptation to agree was incredibly strong. He was so close to you, his touch gentle and warm and his gaze so sweet. It took all the will power you could muster to pull away from him, giving you head a gentle shake.

"I wish I could...but I'm helping with a few projects...sorry."

The rejection obviously hit him hard, disappointment clear on his face, you couldn't stop yourself from the vague promise to hang out soon. The lie slipped through the small smile on your lips before you turned to leave. Before you could take more than a step away you were stopped, Satori's large hand wrapped gently around your wrist.

"Wait..." He murmured, pulling you back towards him. "I miss you Y/N."

Stop.

"It's been weird not having you around..."

Your head felt fuzzy and though you knew he was just being honest and genuinely meant what he said, it did nothing for the bitter taste that invaded your mouth. His free hand started to reach out, intent on tucking some stray hair out of your face. You wanted him to touch you, to feel his warm hands on your body, to be held tightly against his chest and listen to his heart beat. The desire was so strong you felt yourself starting to lean in towards his outstretched hand but a sharp pain shot through your chest and helped you focus, helped you remember.

"Stop." Your voice was soft but the command was firm. He complied, his arm left in the air a moment before dropping down to his side.

"What's wrong?" It was an innocent enough question but as you looked up at him, the pain growing, you felt hurt and angry.

"Why are you doing this?" You can't help the sharp edge in your voice as you question him.

"Doing..what..I was just going to hug you. We used to..." It was too much. He was looking so sad and confused. You wanted to comfort him, to apologize for how you had been acting and what you said but then you'd have to tell him the truth.

"Yea, we used to but, Satori, you have a girlfriend. So...stop trying to be all flirty with me and...keep your hands to yourself." You knew what you said would hurt him, but you said it anyway, your heart breaking as you saw the edges of his mouth turn down. It was too late to regret them and you couldn't bear to see the hurt in his eyes.

"I'm...sorry.." You whisper out a pathetic apology as you pull your wrist free and take off down the hallway.

Tendou was confused, he felt like he had done something wrong but he wasn't sure he had. He was hurt, seeing the look on your face and listening to what you had said but part of him felt the truth. You had become so distant and he genuinely missed you. His days felt hollow without you in them. He missed the way your nose would crinkle up when you laughed too hard. He missed the way your face would light up when you got excited. He missed being near you, he just missed you. After seeing you now and talking with you, he felt troubled but it didn't have so much to do with what you had said. You didn't look well. It was more than just being tired, which was your favorite was to excuse away your tired appearance. For the brief moments he'd held onto your wrist, he could feel you trembling. It wasn't so noticeable when you were moving or from far away but up close and holding you, it was so obvious. Something was wrong, but he didn't know what. Part of him wanted to run after you and ask you until you confessed, but the look on your face kept him rooted to the spot as he tried to sort out his thoughts.

While Satori stood conflicted, you were on your hands and knees, red petals drifting lazily from your mouth as cough after cough slammed into you until you were left gagging. It felt almost violent, your throat burned from the repeated action but your mouth felt wet and almost warm. Wheezing and shaky, you leaned back until you were resting against the back of your legs. You lifted a hand and swiped the back of it across your cheeks and mouth to clear away stray tears and petals. As you pull your hand away, your eyes go wide at the sight, wet smudges of red streaked across the skin.