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starkspondwater · 3 months ago

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WHAT ABT SOME STUFF FOR OUR CRAIG MAN DUDE BRO IDK

( have you written about him idk )

like imagine craig being head over heels so much so that he cant have his nonchalant wheres my hug at attitude. him being flustered and shiii 😭 especially if the reader is the opposite of him... like dates at the mall w like a girly girl and he's all carrying victorias secret bags tryna be all stoic 😔 ( imagine he almost pulled a stan when reader was like looking at like cute lacy sets )

feel free to ingnore js tryna fulfill your wishes for more requests!

CRAIG! While I adore all the different pairings I've seen craig in, I do appreciate some craig x reader too! I love opposites being paired together, I think it makes for some fun interactions!

i will ignore nothing this was great

Spanish translation by @glitterycollectivestudent here on wattpad

Summary: Craig meets a girl that has him doing things far from his norm, but he couldn't care one bit. (smut)

a/n: I know some people hate when others write him as very neutral, but I personally like it so that's what I'm doing!

Out of Character- Craig Tucker x Reader

Craig wasn’t sure how everything happened exactly. All he knew was one moment he had been dealing with bullshit in the groupchat he had with his childhood friends, his head hung low as he walked from one building on campus to another, and the next he was sprawled on the slightly damp ground. When he realized the person that ran into him full speed wasn’t just some douchebag, but a frantic looking girl in pretty tights, the anger dissipated and he found himself at a loss for words.

Apologies spilled from your pretty lips as you gathered up the books you had dropped, embarrassment pouring out of you in a large wave. You barely even glanced at the tall boy you rudely ran into when you shouted a quick goodbye and ran off to your next class. Craig watched as you hurried off, his eyes trailing you all the way until you had disappeared around a corner. Just when he was about to get up himself, he noticed that you had missed a book in your haste.

It didn’t take much probing to know where you’d be. The book you left behind was a very specific textbook he had seen a few classmates tote around, and with his blunt way of questioning he was actually able to figure out exactly where and when this class was so he could return your book…and possibly get a closer look at you.

Wednesday at 9:50 am found him in one of the west side buildings waiting next to a classroom he had no business being by. He had been sitting idly by as students strolled through, his eyes scanning for any sight of you. To be honest, he was a little apprehensive. For one, he had only seen you once and it was unlikely you’d be wearing the exact same thing you had just the other day, and two, what was he supposed to say to you?

Craig had never been the most…social. He had made friends, really good friends, but that didn’t equate to having incredibly good social skills. He knew he often came off brash and blunt, two things that sometimes gave others cause to go on the defensive. Not a good first impression. He had been trying to think of the sort of greeting he might say when you came bounding into view.

With a pep in your step you had made it up the stairwell. Seeing you from this angle and not from down on the ground he could see you were very pretty. You definitely had a sort of sweet, simple style going on, something like he’d see Marj wear back home. Comfortable but still gave off the vibe that you made an effort.

He was so lost in his analysis of you that he didn’t register how quickly you made it up the hallway. It was no wonder you had bulldozed him before with how intently you walked, making him stumble as he rushed to grab your attention.

“Hey.” You spun around at the sound of his voice.

“Hi?” For a second you looked at the boy in front of you in confusion. It took only a second when recognition dawned on you. “Oh! You’re the guy I knocked over Monday! I am so, so sorry about that again!”

“It’s alright…you left this,” he drawled, holding out your textbook. Your eyes grew a bit at the sight before you gave Craig a blinding smile. He was definitely cute, you decided.

“Thank you! You’re really a lifesaver!” gently taking the book from his hand, you hesitated going into your classroom. It was past 10 and though the professor wouldn’t actually begin things for another few minutes you didn’t have the time you wanted to talk with the boy.

Quickly pulling out a pen, you gestured for his hand. Curiously, he obliged, eyeing you warily. With small strokes you printed out a neat 10 digits before pulling away.

“Text me later and I’ll buy you a coffee!” Shooting him a wink and whipping back around, you were gone before Craig could respond.

He honestly wasn’t too sure what to make of you, but he did know that this small exchange left him wanting more. So, he texted and you both went for coffee, the rest was history.

_____

Craig was sure if his friends could see him now they would think some body snatcher had taken over him. Currently, you were a small step ahead of him while he carried your purse and a few shopping bags, and he was doing it without complaint.

Craig did a lot of things that would’ve had his friends concerned for his mental faculties. Years of his laid back neutrality were testament to what he was about in life. So why in the hell was he following some girl around like a lovesick dog? You.

From the first coffee date he was drawn in, and apparently so were you because you kept inviting him to everything you did. He ended up doing a lot of things he normally would not have been caught dead doing, like participating in corny campus events and the dreaded paint nights your friends kept putting on.

He was surprised at first as he wasn’t talkative or particularly warm, but it didn’t seem to bother you. Even his occasional blunt commentary didn’t upset you, even if it was a little rude at times. You simply laughed and went with the flow, like you knew he didn’t mean anything by it. You understood him.

So whenever you looked at him with that pretty little face, he folded instantly.

Hell, you even had the poor boy buying you things. He worked part time at the campus bookstore and while he didn’t make much it wasn’t like he had rent to pay, so he was more than happy spending some of it on trinkets he knew you’d love. It was a little addictive seeing how excited you got over the smallest things, jumping up to make up for his tall frame, arms around his neck and dragging him into a sweet smooch. So of course he wondered what would happen with a little shopping spree.

He wasn’t disappointed.

Watching you spin around and show off different things was more fun than Craig would ever admit. He enjoyed as you spun, twirling a small skirt around you as you asked for his opinion. Oh, he liked that. He liked knowing that you wanted to know what he liked. He liked everything you wore, but the fact that you even cared was extremely nice.

His favorite part of this trip, however, was one particular store. Victoria’s Secret.

The name of it brings back memories of him and his friends, too young to really understand the true purpose of the place, daring the others to venture in and jack around. He had never actually been in one before and took the opportunity to look around as you flagged down an associate.

Craig could see the appeal of all the lace and fabric now that he was older. He marveled that there were so many options, different colors and styles adorning walls and displays all around him. It wasn’t long before you had gotten his attention once more, apologizing because he needed to wait while you tried on a few things. He simply shrugged and let you get to it as he walked around the small store.

He was about halfway to the registers when something caught his eye. Lingerie was not exactly something he felt strongly about, I mean why would someone want to deal with all of that just to get to the sex? The item in front of him had Craig realizing he was a stupid, stupid man.

The label said it was a “babydoll,” whatever the fuck that was, but he didn’t care about that. What got his attention was the silky, deep blue fabric of it, black lace along the top of the cups. It was simple, much simpler than most of the stuff he had walked past, but the color is what dragged his gaze over. It was the same blue as his hat, which was slightly more ratty but nonetheless the same one he’s worn since he was a kid.

It’d almost be like you were wearing part of him.

Color you surprised to see him already holding a bag by the time you finally got to the register. A quick peek inside had you giggling, knowing just what he had planned.

The entire way back to your place Craig could not think straight, thoughts of what you would look like wrapped up in what he bought especially for you plaguing his mind. On the outside he looked cool, calm, and a little bored, but on the inside he was a blushing, impatient mess. The only things telling you he was looking forward to what was going to happen just as much as you were was the way his hands gripped the steering wheel and his slightly more aggressive driving.

_____

Walking into your ensuite to change, you tried to calm your nerves. It wasn’t as if the two of you had not done anything before, but something about this time felt different. Craig was not one to openly show his emotions very well, unless he was especially pissed off. You weren’t sure if he’d have any reaction to you at all even.

It was a simple set, a silk top and matching panties, both in that dark blue. You weren’t entirely sure what had attracted him to it but it was pretty regardless. You were pleased to note that Craig had a good eye as it fit just as it was supposed to. Taking a deep breath, you stepped out.

The reaction was immediate, small in nature, but enough for you to notice. His eyes widened at the sight of you standing there and from even this distance you could see he had stopped breathing. A flush crawled up his neck and onto his face, something you had rarely ever seen on him. You watched as he gulped before standing, walking closer to you.

“Do you like it?” a teasing smile played on your lips.

Craig said nothing, his eyes drinking you in. Bringing a hand up he grasped the edge of the top between his pointer finger and thumb, rubbing the material between them. His breathing had started back up, but you could tell it wasn’t even and this close you could see the way his pupils dilated.

“...Pretty…You look really pretty.” Craig mentally cursed himself for how shaky his voice came out. He knew you’d look good, he had pictured it enough during the day, but actually seeing it was something else. You were a complete vision to him and by god he was going to savor it.

He savored the way you led him back to bed. He savored the way you undressed him with care, kissing him throughout the process. He savored the way you got on top of him where you could feel just how bad he needed you.

You had gotten the panties off but when you attempted to do the same with the top he stopped you.

“Keep it on,” he pleaded, eyes so full of want that it stopped you in your tracks.

You rode him slowly at first, but Craig couldn’t help himself. Grabbing your ass he pistoned into you harder and harder, his eyes never straying from your face. Once again, the idea of you wearing a piece of him came to mind.

“You’re mine,” he felt you clench around him, ripping a groan from him. “Say it. Say that you’re mine.”

You did just that, over and over again, keening as he kept his hold on you.

Craig never lost control like this, but tonight he felt feral. He was not a talker in bed, his noise level never above a huff in your ears as he fucked you, but tonight it was as if he was someone else. Seeing you dressed up for him, hearing you say how you were all his, it all drove him insane.

He waited until you came to pull you down onto his chest, one hand cradling your head to his neck and the other firmly on the small of your back. He hammered into you, grunting noisily as the sound of skin on skin filled the air.

He wasn’t sure how long he had you like that before he felt the tell tale sign of his own ruin. He couldn’t stop himself, pumping into you more and more until he knew he was about to burst. At the last second he pulled out and with a groan, warm spurts coated your center and inner thighs.

Breathing hard, you rolled over and settled beside him. Silence followed the two of you for a time, and when you turned your head to look at him, you saw that Craig had once again put on his normal, neutral face.

“So…you wanna order pizza and watch red racer reruns?” you giggled a bit at the way he nodded vigorously despite the look on his face. That was something you really loved, how it was the little things that told you what he felt. It was really cute the more you thought about it.

Getting up you grabbed the discarded panties, wondering if you’d have time for a shower before the pizza got there when another idea popped into your head. If this made him act like that once, could it happen again?

“Hey Craig? Would you be alright if I just wore this the rest of the night?” You put on your most innocent look, fluttering eyelashes and all. You knew your answer as you saw the faint creeping of a blush once more.

Craig was more than okay seeing you in that thing, in fact, he showed you that much two more times that evening.

#south park x reader #south park x y/n #south park x you #craig tucker x you #craig tucker x y/n #craig tucker x reader #south park fanfiction #i think #i think i have a thing with possessiveness #cause this is like the second time i've written it #request

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cheriladycl01 · 8 months ago

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Kinktober 31/10/2024 The Grid - Halloween Party

Plot: Halloween Party Couple Costumes

MAX VERSTAPPEN:

You both went to the party as the characters from Kill Bill, it was one of Max's favorite films and you were excited to dress up as the Bride. Originally you were going to go for the full latex outfit but because Max had a few parties in the same night you'd both be travelling between you had to do a bit of makeshift work.

"You look hot" he says looking over you as you unzip the bright yellow top you had on, just to show off a little more cleavage for him.

"Yeah?" you ask pulling the katana up and holding it in positions being goofy as he took some pictures of you.

"And i think dying your hair blonde ... good shout" he grins running his hands through your freshly dyed blonde locks just so you could pull of this Halloween costume without a wig.

LANDO NORRIS:

You wanted to be funny and go as Gru and Vector ... but no McLaren thought it was too 'silly' and wasn't a 'good image' for Lando as a now championship contender.

So you guys decided as you were only going to a small Quadrant Haloween party that you guys would go lowkey and just try and use as much stuff as you could from home.

Naturally you were both at home when he had the idea of both going as the game characters from Subway Surfers, out of all the games both you and Lando played you didn't expect to go as mobile game characters, something from Valorant or even Tarkov but no here you were with a red beanie, hitched up red underwear under low rise jeans and an empty aerosol can.

"Cant believe you convinced me into this" you shake your head, knowing all the girls there would be going as either really hot people or would be very funny like you'd intended ... but at least you were with Lando and you guys both couldn't escape the costume police you knew would be at the party.

"You love me babe now come on lets go jump some trains"

OSCAR PIASTRI:

When Oscar had met you when he first came to England you made of point of forcing him to binge your comfort show, Peaky Blinders with you which led to this years Halloween costume for the both of you.

While Oscar was the gentleman and got his outfit as show accurate as possible you took the hot slant on it despite having a shirt, waistcoat and jacket covering up the majority of your upper body leaving your legs to do all the hot girl work.

"We look good" Oscar smiled looking at you guys in the long full length mirror in your apartment as you guys were about to leave.

"You're right we do" you smile reaching up to kiss his cheek forgetting the bright red lipstick that was covering your lips.

"AH AH. Let them dry first" he says putting his finger on one showing the stain.

When you got to Logan's party you were met with such a different vibe. You and Oscar had decided to stay in America for Halloween which was a good choice as they were crazy for any kind of holiday celebration.

"Will anyone here know who we are?" you ask wondering if you're costume was too niche.

"Lets hope they don't, quick and easy conversations so we don't look rude and unimpressed" he kisses the side of you head, knowing how introverted you both are/

CARLOS SAINZ:

Of course you had to go as young Morticia and Gomez Addams. It was something you knew for a fact Carlos would look incredible in and you had the perfect features to pull of Morticia.

You guys were attending a Halloween Party that actually had a lot of the drivers at, it was in a club that had invited you all as a brand deal with F1 and you guys all didn't really have an excuse not to go.

You guys got an uber, which is a strange experience when you have a boyfriend who drives for a living.

So many of the other wags were there and a costume competition had been held which you and Carlos had ended up winning, you think Lando most defiantly forged the votes but you couldn't deny that you and Carlos looked like you both put the most amount off effort in.

CHARLES LECLERC:

Charles didn't ever really understand the hype for spooky season, enjoying other more family oriented holidays more such as Christmas or even birthdays.

But when you said that your sister was hosting a small party (that of course ended up being not so small at all) that she was dying for you to make an appearance at you had to go despite the late notice.

So there you guys were two days before ironing patches to blue and red tops you'd brought from the most accessible shops in Monaco and because you were bringing Charles and you wanted to match but with the lack of time options were thin.

So of course doing a really bad attempt at Sally and Lightening McQueen was the option Charles decided on and everyone at the party found you guys so funny especially once they realised who Charles was as a famous racing driver.

To say despite the 5 minute crafts outfit you guys put together you were everyone's choice of conversation both at the party and after.

YUKI TSUNODA:

Chef Linguine, absolutely not Chef Tsunoda and you as his Remi. It meant you got to dress up as a sexy mouse while Yuki could live his dreams of being a chef, dressing up in the whole outfit that you were surprised to see he just had in his closest already.

"You look like a cute mouse" he smiles looking over the white corset and sort grey skirt you'd opted for.

"Do i make a good Remi?" you ask sweetly and he nods.

"I still don't get why you didn't go as Collette" he sighs, thinking it would be odd for him to kiss you tonight when this was your outfit.

"Because canonically Collette is a better chef than Linguine because actually Linguine cannot cook without the rats help ... so I'm still not sure why i went as the rat. Maybe i should have gone as Chef Skinner" you groan now overthinking the whole costume.

FRANCO COLAPINTO:

Franco's nickname for you was 'princesa' so of course you going as one of the Disney Princesses made sense however when he said you guys should do Flynn Ryder and Rapunzel you almost lost your shit.

You were going to suggest the little mermaid as you'd love to see him in Prince Eric's soft pirate outfit but the Flynn outfit was just as exciting and you of course looked great in purple and could use your naturally blonde hair.

"Are you ready my Princesa?" he asks from the bottom of the stairs. You were expecting to turn round the corner with a soft graceful smile to see HIM awestruck at your costume.

Unfortunately god had other plans and it was you who was gobsmacked at your incredibly sexy boyfriend.

"Fuckkkkk Francoooo. Lets skip the party" you say running down the stairs to grip onto his arm.

FERNANDO ALONSO:

As an older couple on the grid who still loved a party and having fun you and Fernando decided old school was the best way forward. And for Fernando seeing you in sexy leather pants and a tight black top he was all but happy to keep pulling you away for sneaky kisses once you'd got to the club.

Nando was normally very ... sexually driven but this outfit of yours had turned him into some kind of beast and you were not complaining.

Especially when you guys got home that night.

ESTEBAN OCON:

Being the Marvel nerd that he was he'd asked if he could do Deadpool and you do Wolverine, which you did want to at first but when you couldn't find the right hairstyle and decided the outfit just didn't look good this year it fell through to be picked up another year.

Which is where his next idea came in, you'd both decided to go as Spiderman's he'd worn some grey joggers with him as the suit was pretty tight on him and he didn't want anything to come out in the media however you took the Spiderman look the whole way and for the whole night Estaban had to stay close to you warding off all the other guys who were watching you with what he explained to you as 'fuck me' eyes.

Taglist:

@littlebitchsposts @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @daemyratwst @lauralarsen @the-untamed-soul @thewulf @itsjustkhaos @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @summissss @gulphulp @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhhhh @georgeparisole @youcannotcancelquidditch @tallbrownhairsarcastic @ourteenagetragedy @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @eiraethh @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @dark-night-sky-99 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic @landossainz @darleneslane @barcelonaloverf1life @r0nnsblog @ilove-tswizzle @laneyspaulding19 @malynn @landosgirlxoxo @marie0v @yourbane @teamnovalak @nikfigueiredo @fionaschicken @0picels0 @tinydeskwriter @ironmaiden1313 @splaterparty0-0 @formula1mount

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nicromancytarot · 1 year ago

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WHAT DOES YOUR PERSON WANT TO DO TO YOU? 18+ themes.

This is a general reading based on a collective of people. Take what resonates and leave what doesn’t. If you don’t feel the pile resonates with you, don’t be scared to try another, if it still doesn’t feel right, that’s ok! Maybe our energies aren’t as connected and my readings are not for you.

I do these strictly for fun and educational purposes. I don’t change for these readings and I do not fake readings. I would tell you the cards I got but I pull like 20-30 cards each reading and that just slightly a strenuous task to write them all down lmao.

PICK A CARD READING

I asked my spirit guides what the person you’re thinking about would do to you if they could, this was crazy so pick a picture to find out!

Pile 1 ———> Pile 2 ———> Pile 3

PILE 1

Bro’s fantasising, I put my music on shuffle and got this one song which triggered a memory of when I had a crush on this girl and sat in the car staring out of the window creating scenarios about her to the song lmao, so I feel as though your person may be on the same wavelength as me.

My entire body hurt during this reading, I was having full body channeling which was crazy for me, but as soon as I wrote down that my back and stomach were killing me, the pain went away, so your person may want to metaphorically break your back and possibly even get you pregnant, I was also randomly sweating like crazy so it’s gonna be steamy when they get to have you, I feel like you guys will be going for multiple rounds until both of you are absolutely exhausted and can’t take anymore.

Not going to lie, I see this being someone from the past? #Fuckexes. (Not literally.)

Firstly they may stalk your social media or keep tabs on you, I notice someone gasping at the others breasts if you have those, if they have breast than I’m pretty sure you love them, this is the type of conversation when someone can’t stop looking at the others breasts and is barely paying attention to the conversation.

They wanna watch you play with yourself, they may even want you to send them a video of you touching yourself.

For some of you I can see that they like butt-play, and they like having from behind cus they really enjoy your butt and shoulders, they may like to leave kisses or hickeys on the back of your shoulders. They may also only really see you in a room full of people romantically, but I do get senses that this person may have or might cheat if you were or get into a relationship.

PILE 2

They wanna wine and dine you prior to having sex with you, and I think that they also want to learn what you’re into and have a long winded conversation about both of your boundaries. They also really enjoy your breasts, or you enjoy theirs, I can see that either of you may want to leave a lot of kisses or hickeys there; maybe even for other people to see if you or they enjoy wearing low cut shirts and dresses.

They seem very gentle and worry about your pleasure more than their own, they do want to do some type of butt stuff with you. (What is it with the butt stuff today?) They want to eat the booty or go the full way with it.

At the end they want you to reward their hard efforts with some good ole’ head.

PILE 3

They want to offer a relationship before having sex with you, I do get the vibe that this could be a future spouse who picks you up after heartbreak as we have both the 4 of wands and the 3 of swords. This is the tile of sex that has you forgetting about all the bad things in your life and in the world.

There’s only one card in the spread where she’s not covering her stomach and it’s while she’s watching him count his money so you may only think about getting pregnant after you know they have enough money to sustain you and the baby (they do, they live a life of luxury.) Or you may show them that you have enough money before they think of allowing you to get them pregnant.

They want to take you from behind, finally we have a pile that doesn’t refer to butt-play (amen.) They’re pretty masculine so they would want to take over all of the masculine roles.

You may find them sneaking a glance at your breasts when you first meet.

#pick a card #tarot #tarot reading #tarotblr #tarotcommunity #tarot witch #free tarot #tarot cards #daily tarot

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gudfornuthin · 3 months ago

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The Baker and the Ballerina

Chapter two

Pairing: Frank Castle x fem!reader

Summary: the studio needs more work than anticipated. The baker across the street catches someone's eye.

Word count: 0.8k

Series warnings: slow burn, cliché tropes, mentions of PTSD, mentions of abusive relationships, (eventual) smut, violence

A/N: For anyone who is or isn't wondering, Frank's friend David is Ebon Moss-Bachrach's character in The Punisher. I really like their dynamic and I thought it could give similar vibes to The Bear and how their characters interact with each other in that too. This chapter is also short and just an introduction to the reader, but I promise she and Frank will be meeting in the next part. I'm a sucker for story building. Anyways, enough yapping from me! Hope you enjoy this part and feedback is always appreciated :)

The building across from the bakery had been abandoned for a long time. When it was in use, and labelled as a tattoo parlour, it wasn't hard to figure out what actually went on in there. Mainly due to the shady men entering and exiting at early hours in the morning and late hours in the evening. Also because of the obvious smell of marijuana. The cops eventually caught on, and the place was raided and shut down, giving it the next couple of years the time to collect dust and grow mould. Enter Y/N.

The place had three floors. Ground floor for storage, first floor for a kitchenette area with space to relax, and the second floor open planned. The perfect place for Y/N to set up a dance studio. Having taken dance lessons since she was three, and moving onto more technical stuff such as ballet, it was time for her dream to become a reality. Sharing her gift with others willing to learn. Unfortunately, it was going to take more effort than originally planned.

It's mid-afternoon, and Y/N is sat on the floor in the studio, attempting to rip the wooden floorboards up, ready to be replaced. Her friend, Farah, stands by one of the windows, scraping at the peeling paint. She felt bad asking Farah for help considering it was her day off, and god knows how many of those she gets working at the firm she does. But she was more than happy to, and she'd rather focus on her friend's mess than the ones in the courtroom.

"Have you decided wall colours yet?"

Y/N shakes her head. "I can't even think about that right now."

She holds up part of the floor, glad to be wearing gloves. "Why are these so damp?"

"Don't know, don't want to know," Farah mumbles.

Y/N looks over the remaining flooring she hasn't ripped up, the weight of what she's doing only just starting to hit her. She uses her arm to wipe away the sweat on her forehead and lets out a deep breath.

"Do you think I can still open this place in two months and spend less than the budget I set?"

Farah hums. "Not if you want it to look good."

She doesn't receive a reply, looking over to where her friend sits with her head in her hands, appearing on the verge of a breakdown. She puts down the scraper and moves closer to Y/N. she kneels down and rests her hands on the young woman's shoulders, trying to provide any comfort she can.

"You've worked your ass off to get where you are right now," Farah says. "This is just one bump in the road. You don't think you can handle one bump?"

Y/N shakes her head, grabbing a hammer and continuing with the floorboard removal. "One small bump. I can get past that."

Farah smiles and nods, patting her on the back and walking over to the window. Y/N digs the hammer underneath a nail, pulling hard and almost hitting herself in the face. She takes out the loose board, revealing a hole looking into the room below.

"Fuck me," she grumbles. "I gotta hire someone."

Before she can think too much about the surprising hole, Y/N hears Farah let out a low whistle. She glances at her friend, seeing her attention focused on something outside.

"What?" Y/N asks after several seconds of silence.

Farah looks at her with a small smirk. "Nothing, just the buff eye candy walking into that bakery across the road."

"Eye candy?" Y/N snorts, turning back to the job at hand. "You sound like a forty-year-old man."

Farah ignores her, continuing to stare out the window. "All I'm saying is a guy with that kinda body doesn't eat pastries and cakes."

"How can you even tell? We're on the third floor."

"He stands out," Farah looks at Y/N. "And he's definitely your type."

Y/N shakes her head before her friend can finish her sentence, moving all of the loose boards into a trash bag. She takes her gloves off and picks up her phone, deciding to look up local builders who might be cheap enough to get the job done to the studio. Lord knows she can't do it all by herself.

"Hard pass then," Y/N replies, typing on her phone. "After the shit I went through with Jonah, I think I'm done with those kinds of guys. I'm done with relationships in general until I can get this place where I want it to be."

Farah sulks but understands her reasoning, not wanting to dwell too much on Y/N's ex-boyfriend. "Fine, but if bakery guy lives in the area maybe try and introduce yourself at some point? It wouldn't hurt to meet some new people, make some new friends?"

Y/N looks at her with a small smile on her face. "I have plenty of friends already."

"Not including me and the guy at the deli by your apartment," Farah responds, heading for the door. "Who, let's be honest, is not your friend."

"He puts extra croutons on my salad," Y/N mumbles.

"Doesn't count!" Farah yells as she leaves the room, taking the bag of floorboards with her.

Y/N shakes her head in amusement, looking around the studio. Those builders couldn't get here sooner.

- - -

Taglist: @nialhero-blog @luvrgirlsworld @britt217 @solstararis

#frank castle x reader #the punisher x reader #jon bernthal x reader #frank castle #the punisher #jon bernthal #x reader #marvel

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estellesdoll · 6 months ago

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﹢﹒𝑭𝒖𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒆 𝑻𝒂𝒍𝒌𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑭𝒖𝒏𝒏𝒚 𝑮𝒊𝒇𝒕𝒔﹐𝑪𝒉𝒓𝒊𝒔 𝑺.

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𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬 : A blurb based on their latest YouTube video. If you'd like, feel free to send me requests, and don't forget to add yourselves to the taglist! 🥰

"This one’s for Matt," I announce, grabbing the neatly wrapped gift from the pile and walking over to him with a grin.

Chris, lounging on the couch with one arm draped over the back, raises an eyebrow. "What is it? A guide on how to accept defeat gracefully?"

I shoot him a playful glare. "Be nice, it’s Christmas."

Matt clutches his chest dramatically. "Finally, someone who gets me. Thank you for your dedication to the cause."

"Just open it," I urge, laughing. "It's officially part of the family now."

Matt pauses, narrowing his eyes suspiciously before tearing off the wrapping paper. "Wait, what’s that supposed to mean?"

Inside the wrapping is a plushie—soft, round, and ridiculously cute. His expression shifts from suspicion to utter delight.

"Now this is peak gift-giving," Matt declares, holding it up like a trophy. "Look at him! Adorable, squishy perfection."

Nick leans over, inspecting it. "Yeah, you both have the same vibes. Low effort, maximum cuddles."

Chris laughs, shaking his head. "You’re naming it, aren’t you?"

Matt shoots him a glare. "Excuse me, Chris. His name is Benson, and he’s already the best member of this family."

Nick claps sarcastically. "Congratulations, Matt. You’ve officially peaked."

Matt cradles the plushie dramatically. "Unlike you guys, Benson doesn’t come with chaos and unsolicited advice. He’s the perfect child."

Chris rolls his eyes, tossing a pillow at Matt. "You’re impossible."

Nick grabs a gift bag and hands it to me. "Alright, your turn. Let’s see if this tops Benson."

I open the bag to find a sleek designer purse. "Nick! How did you know I wanted this?"

Nick shrugs, a smirk playing on his lips. "I have my ways."

Chris smirks, grabbing a massive box and sliding it toward me. "Step aside, Nick. Let the real MVP take over."

I eye the box warily. "Chris, what did you do?"

"Only the best thing ever," he says, his smug grin making me both excited and nervous.

Inside the box is a treasure trove of makeup, skincare products, and items from my online wishlists.

"You bought everything in my cart?" I ask, stunned.

Chris leans back, looking proud. "You’re welcome. I pay attention."

Nick whistles. "Alright, I’ll give it to him. That’s pretty solid."

Matt smirks, reaching for two identical gift bags and handing them to his brothers. "Speaking of solid, these are for you."

Chris and Nick exchange a look before opening their bags. The room fills with laughter as they pull out identical boxes of condoms.

"Really, Matt?" Chris groans, holding the box up.

Nick examines his thoughtfully. "Top-shelf stuff. Thanks, man."

Matt leans back smugly. "Just looking out for my family. You’re welcome."

Chris tosses a pillow at him. "You’re ridiculous."

Matt grins. "Hey, someone has to be the responsible one."

Nick leans back, smirking. "Speaking of responsibility, I think it’s pretty clear who’s ready for kids in this family." He points between me and Chris.

I blush, ducking my head, while Chris raises an eyebrow. "What are you talking about?"

"Oh, please," Nick says, waving a hand. "You’re practically counting down the days. Look at you two—domestic vibes all over the place."

Chris shrugs, his arm slipping around my shoulders. "What can I say? I like the idea of a little less chaos and a little more... us."

Matt snickers, hugging Benson. "Big words, bro. You know babies don’t sleep, right? Hope you’re ready for that level of chaos."

I laugh, nudging Chris. "I think we’d handle it just fine. I mean, I do love kids."

Chris glances at me, his expression softening. "Me too," he says quietly. "But maybe not right this second."

"Yeah," Nick cuts in, smirking. "You two can’t even agree on a movie without a debate. Imagine picking baby names."

I roll my eyes. "We’d figure it out."

Matt grins. "You say that now, but just wait until your kid decides 3 a.m. is playtime."

Chris smirks, pulling me closer. "We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. Unlike you, Matt, I can handle more than a stuffed animal."

Matt gasps. "First of all, Benson is a low-maintenance angel. Secondly, he doesn’t steal my food like Nick does."

Nick shrugs, unbothered. "Consider it training for real-life parenting. You’re welcome."

The banter carries on, the room filled with laughter, teasing, and the warmth of family—perfectly chaotic and undeniably ours.

𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 : @emely9274 @gemzyy

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﹒◟send me your requests and use an emoji if you want to stay anonymous. 𓂃

@/estellesdoll

divider by @miujo

#chris sturniolo x reader #sturniolo triplets #estellesdoll #matt sturniolo #chris sturniolo #nick sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #chris sturniolo x y/n #chris sturniolo x you #chris sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo blurb #bf!chris #christopher sturniolo x reader #Christopher sturniolo blurb #matthew sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo

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crownsley · 4 months ago

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Thoughts on Hulu's Paradise

(Spoilers under cut)

Sterling K Brown is one of the best actors alive. The shot of him on the plane as Cal offers him a phone to call his wife? Sensational. And he didn't even have lines!

This show was clearly meant for the heyday of American television. It's squeezing so much stuff into only 8 episodes. The fast pace is entertaining but also gives me whiplash.

The title card is comically low effort. Just white Arial bold "Paradise" on a black screen. Is it a placeholder and they're gonna replace it when it airs on cable?

No Sniper Jane backstory episode? No Billy survived soap opera twist? Oh. 😔

Episode 7:

Sinatra is like comically evil. Like, what's her problem? He should've shot her and then figured out the mystery himself.

The assassin can't be his wife but I'm struggling to imagine who else it COULD be.

It totally makes sense that people have snuck into their city and I wouldn't be surprised if people are also sneaking out. If Jeremy was able to take Presley outside to the hanger so easily, I wouldn't doubt that someone just follows him whenever he sneaks outside.

I know they picked everyone in the bunker based on psychology, but they should've let that cunty doomsday environmental scientist in as well. I assume they didn't because his vibes are atrocious and he'd be spreading panic with his pessimism, but the pros outweigh the cons, no?

#paradise hulu #yelling to the void bc no one watches this show

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kissmetwicekissmedeadly · 8 months ago

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MO'S FANFIC BEAUTYFYING MASTERCLASS!👩‍🏫

So it seems like you guys like how I do my banners and layouts on @xxsycamore ! I wanted to share a few tips about making similar ones, along with some of my observations on their importance! Be warned, some of the screenshots I'll use to illustrate my point will be of my smut fics! This post is intended for the ikemen series community. While the tips could be found useful for other fandoms as well, it's important to note that it's only this fandom that I've taken into account and because of that my observations could be unreliable if you chose to follow my advice outside of the fandom!

The importance

First of all, a good layout is a subjective term. Second, a "good" layout is not guaranteed to boost your fic's popularity. Not all of us are able to put the time and effort into fancy banners and dividers, but the good news is, you don't really need them! You should always strive to do only as much as you can without straining yourself. Here you can see a minimal effort fic layout vs one that took 30~ minutes to put together, both posted around the same time, both having a similar reception when it comes to notes! Keep in mind that a layout is just one of the many factors to take into account for your fic's popularity status, and you shouldn't obsess with it either way.

2. The minimum: Banner + Title

Not everyone checks out every single post on their dash while they scroll! I follow around 1100 people and while not all of them are active, it's easy to miss a post that could as well have been the best thing I'd see that day. Your brain recognizes what a typical fanfiction post looks like - a rectangular picture with a title above/underneath, followed by text. As long as you scroll past a post with a similar construction and you're interested, you might want to scroll back and check it out.

3. Banners

The information that you get from a banner is typically about the character(s) featured in the fic. Using the example above, you'll see that a simple cropped picture of the character gets the job done! (an in-game sprite at that, not a fancy card photo)

If you decide to use a card, you can browse google for a good one of your character(s). I try to select a card that depicts something similar to what's happening in my fic, either the action or the "vibes" (daytime or nighttime, outside or indoors, canon or modern, etc.), but sometimes it's better to choose the one that will look good instead of the one that's more fitting.

Finding cards of good quality is also challenging, and I'd advise you to avoid blurry/low-quality banners even if those would be best fitting.

Stick to the rectangular horizontal format if possible. I like square banners sometimes, but it's better when you can see the whole layout at once!

4. Editing the banners & photo coloring

If you decide you want to go out all, you'll need a photo editing app or a program. I use one called Snow which is mainly for selfies but gets the job done. It has many filters to choose from, but inputting text there could be a hassle sometimes. Another one I use is Pixlr. Yeah, I couldn't let it go ever since the days it was just a website...it's been about 10 years but I still rely on it (now as an app) for some stuff, like cropping down images with very big height to width ratio (like thin strips for dividers). In very rare instances I use my (paid) art program, Clip Studio Paint. I know that many people use Canva for their banners but I can't get used to it, I guess it's not my thing, haha. That's why you should see what works for you. I prefer a certain amount of limitation, like having filters to choose from, simply because I don't want to think too much about it and to be able to spend too much time on it (I'm a perfectionist)...

Maybe you just want to give your picture some nice coloring, nothing too much, just a slight change of tone that it's noticeable but not in a screaming way. There are still some things to avoid, mainly old-looking filters. I'm talking about the ones that were mainstream on Instagram during the last decade, the pinkish sepia one for instance. Ones that have too high exposure value and make the bright parts practically glow are not a good look either, same for the too dark ones. Making the character unrecognizable is also not good, and some filters can do that, especially in the case where they have fair hair and the filter makes it appear as another color. Again, those examples are bad only in my own opinion and could look good in certain circumstances or if it's a desired look!

Here's the collage for the banner used for my fic Nine Nights (MDNI) before the filter (first picture), a variation I did but scrapped (second pic) and the one I went with in the end (third pic). While the bottom pic is in contrast with what I said about making characters unrecognizable, here I rely on the fact that it's enough that it's obvious this will feature all of the Crown members just by looking at the bunch of them. I liked how the colors pop up, almost as if each one gets assigned a theme color (interestingly I didn't pick the cards for that purpose), and it's just a pretty coloring in my opinion as a whole. I achieved this by tweaking the RGB values from the "Curves" tool in Snow.

Another cool thing to do with your banner is adding transparent elements in it, like how I did with this one (see it from the link below, it's not depicted here on the pics). The thing is, this could be very energy-consuming, you'll need an app/program that can do that as not all of them work with transparent images, and in the end, it could be just barely noticeable. But it can be fun from time to time.

5. Titles

A title is the other main element of your fic's layout and it should stand out. If you hate coming up with titles (understandable...) you can just put a "(character) x reader fluff", for instance. If you look at the example in point 1, I simply used the character's name in place of a title! It doesn't have to be a stressful aspect of putting your fic out there. As a side note, you can try centering your title simply by putting some spaces at the front, but leaving it aligned to the right could be a stylistic choice.

6. Colored text

This one is very optional but good if you want to fancy it up. Tumblr already gives you a bunch of colors to pick from and you can make use of them if they fit the style of your fic, but they're very limited. Luckily we can use just any color we want. (This only works on the fonts tumblr supports! The ones you can choose from when you highlight a text) Unfortunately, the way to do this will make you work with the HTML editor which you can access at the top right corner of your post editing screen (from desktop, click the settings, scroll down to Post editor) and things might seem pretty scary if this is your first time looking there. It's not too hard! You need to use a site that takes your desired piece of text, lets you select colors, and then gives you a code that once pasted in the HTML editor will make it colored when switching back to the Rich text editor. Here's the one I use because it also allows me to blend colors. At the bottom right of the page, I put the text in the first box, select the colors, and upon clicking Run it gives me the code in the bottom box. I use colored text for my title, and sometimes for my information tags.

7. Information tags

This is how I refer to the part of your layout dedicated to showing the pairings, genre, content warnings and wordcount of your fic. This is all optional even to add in the first place. I personally don't bother too much with beautifying that part, but a good tip is using some kind of symbol to separate these pieces of information if they're all in the same paragraph (I use big dots), or to place in front of them if they're in different rows (like bullet points). This gives a lot of creative freedom for text art, you should explore it if that's your thing!

8. Fonts & font size

You can experiment with Tumblr's fonts, or you can look for more fonts online - here's a handy site. It's good to find one that is legible enough. 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐟𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞. Again, be warned, those fonts that are outside of tumblr's post editor cannot be colored (as far as I'm aware of)

You can spell your title in all caps if you deem that's a good look for your fic.

Play around with bolds and italics instead of making everything a different font.

The "Biggest" font option here on the editor is not the best one to use as it's simply too big. Big title fonts should be avoided if your title doesn't fit in a single row.

Having different font sizes for different things in your layout can be eye-catching! Besides the obvious upscaling of the title, you can also upscale your information tags. Using small text is also nice and prevents your post from getting too long, but this should only be done for the part of the fic that is not the fic itself. Small text could be harsh on the eyes if it's in big quantities.

9. Dividers

Dividers are another crucial part of a fancy layout! They divide different parts of your layout, like the information tags and the fic's body. There are tons of styles to choose from. Some people like to use dividers that spell out something, like a "minors DNI" warning, a "support your creatives" reminder, the name of the character featured in the fic... You can make your own set of dividers for repeated use. I like to use very thin lines which I color differently according to the fic's theme colors. I also find dividers online, mostly here on tumblr, as there are tons of them if you look them up. It's important to use dividers which are marked free to use, or to otherwise credit their creators.

10. Additional tips

Use gifs. Everything that moves is eye-catching. But don't go overboard with it - one or two moving objects on your layout is plenty. They shouldn't be put too close to the fic's body too, as people might find it distracting. Avoid flashing and glitching gifs, or if you use those and you deem it necessary, tag the post with an epilepsy warning. You can make your banners into gifs by putting a moving filter on them, making it into a video, and turning the video into a gif (the site I use for this is called ezgif and it has plenty of other options for working with gifs and videos), and you can also make or find gif dividers.

Banner themes are nice, but they don't always look good. I'm talking about making a series of banners (like for a bunch of fics made for the same creative challenge) look the same, with the same coloring and filters. I used to make all my banners purple to follow my blog's tumblr theme but I realized not everyone looks good in purple...

Try adding a synopsis for your fic! I know, this is worse than coming up with a title, but we love flipping the book over to look at the synopsis before jumping into it. Keep it very short and try beautifying it with symbols or fancy quotation marks.

Use the "intended" font from the tumblr post editor to make your information tags or synopsis stand out and shrink the overall length of the post!

Put the body of your fic under a "read more" (the last option when you hit a new row in the post editor). This is very important, especially if you're writing smut - you wouldn't want to make people scroll through all of that if they're not in the mood for it. Putting your whole fic on the dash doesn't make it more likely for people to stop and read it, or at least that's just how I see it.

Use emojis! Emojis stand out!

Take inspiration from other people. Get out of your bubble and look at how other fandoms do it, but obviously don't steal.

11. Final thoughts

Making this post felt weird to me! I was motivated by my mutuals complimenting my layouts but also because some of them said "they can't do that" and I wanted to show them it's easy. I also wanted to show them it's not that important and that they shouldn't stress over it at all! At the end of the day it's your fic that matters, not how pretty you can make it work. But instead of simplifying it, I ended up with this massive post of 11 parts, and now it looks scarily big. It's not, okay! I went too much into detail at times, and I want to stress once again that it's all optional anyway. I, personally, don't follow all of this advice. I don't go through the 10 steps of constructing my layout every time I'm about to post a fic. I typically post my fics just before going to bed, and 99% of the time I need it to happen ASAP because it's that late in the night. It's a way to beat my perfectionism, really, and I find it to work for me. I also already have these steps tested and memorized so it all happens quickly and mechanically for me. Making the layout is extremely fun for me and this is my sole driving force for putting in the effort. At the same time, I remind myself not to go overboard because it's stupid to focus on it more than on the fic itself. I love ao3 because everything looks equal on there, but I also love tumblr because I can unleash my creativity in one additional way.

In the process of making this post, I started to wonder if it seems like I'm making this out to be way more important and difficult than it really is, and I want to assure you that this is not my intention at all!

My only hope is that this proves to be helpful for whoever feels like they can use some of the information above. If it leads to just 1 additional note to those criminally underrated fics I see, then I'd be beyond happy!

Have fun posting your fics :)

#ikemen series #ikeseries #ikemen vampire #ikemen villains #ikemen sengoku #ikemen prince #ikemen fanfci #ikemen fanfiction

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formiito · 3 months ago

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low effort hcs : what music would bsd characters listen to?

everyone puts mother mother and tnbhd in dazai playlists but i can't stop thinking about how this guy would probably love 70s city pop. likes number girl and betcover!!, all of that japanese post-rock vibe. rotates between like five songs he's just obsessed with all the time. might listen to math rock on occasion.

he also feels like the exact type of mf to listen to the smiths and now it's canon in my head. 'there's a light that never goes out' is HIS song im convinced.

akutagawa is the kind of guy who would listen to visual kei. everyday that malice mizer is not on spotify he loses it a little. would also love classic goth. bauhaus, the cure, sisters of mercy, he likes all that shit. probably started with old panic! at the disco, it's that emo -> goth pipeline fr.

in my head chuuya loves rock. likes deftones but would be put off by the screaming. lining up with 15, likes hard rock; though back then he would've been more into pop punk stuff. probably fucks with soundgarden, maybe sonic youth, rhcp, nirvana, alice in chains, the velvet underground. it just is the vibe to me. but late at night, like a background sound for working or sleeping, i think chuuya would like jazz. chet baker, coltrane, miles davis. likes physical media and would spend a bit too much on records.

look me in the eye and tell me ranpo wouldn't love shibuya kei. lamp, pitcher56, 800 cherries, satellite lovers, roundtable ft nino. just the sort of music i could picture him listening to. would also love bossa nova. would listen to laufey. once again, i don't make the rules.

fyodor dostoevsky listens to only three kinds of music: symphonic metal, classical music and gregorian chants. this is true and real and you should believe me without question. i think he'd like opeth quite a bit as well. fyodor is also the kind of mf who hates when people refer to baroque or romantic compositions as 'classical'. Yes, he has the eras memorized. disgustingly skilled with most instruments. heard liszt play firsthand.

#music nerd things or wtv #bsd headcannons #bungou stray dogs #bsd #bsd fics #bsd hcs #bungou stray dog hcs #bsd dazai #chuuya bsd #bsd fyodor #bungou stray dogs fyodor #dazai hcs #fyodor hcs #chuuya hcs #akutagawa hcs #bsd akutagawa

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silverzoomies · 2 years ago

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Great Pumpkin

peter maximoff x reader smut

warnings: shameless smut, smut, kissing, porn with plot, halloween, drunk sex, halloween party, porn with feelings, use of the speech quirk "yer"

word count: 7,878

a/n: meant to finish this one before halloween. whoops !! at least november is the spook before christmas !! or halloween 2, electric boogaloo !!

some notes about this one: i wanna apologize for the needless plot. i know it's unnecessary, but i got a little carried away. if anything feels awkward, out of place, or weird? that's my bad. sorry. i was havin' too much fun writing the less smutty stuff. some other notes - think of this as an au, i guess. where erik is hiding out at xavier's for...reasons? idfk. sitcom logic. everyone's living together !! but there's tension !!

tag list: @dewberryobssesed @violetharmonscupcake @kaismanwich @jellyluvr @icannot3 @taintandviolent @ahoyladiesz @scene-and-dandylover @quickandsilvers @luttic @billielourdslays

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All Hallows Eve.

Prior to the X-Family’s spooktacular bash, Hank whipped up a little something special. Using his Einstein brain - or wizard sorcery. Peter couldn’t be too sure - the beastly scientist conjured a powerful inebriant. He heard Peter joke one too many times about his inability to get drunk. Since the speedster’s body filtered through substances at break-neck speed. Leaving not a second’s worth of intoxication time.

No exaggeration there. Peter once tried chugging his mom’s entire stash of liquor, along with a bottle of Purple Toad wine. Some really fruity stuff. Such a mass of booze only left a burn in his throat, along with an onslaught of nausea. All of which lasted 0.2 seconds.

Hank wanted to do Peter a favor for all his hard work lately. And now, he could finally participate in what he missed out on. After all these years. As long as he didn’t use the substance for any nefarious purposes. Per Hank’s request. Whatever that meant. Not like Peter planned on playing pranks at this year’s party. C’mon…really? He’s a teacher, for Geddy’s sake! He's gotta set a good example.

Spoiler alert: he had planned on it. Keyword being had.

Until the inebriation actually kicked in. For the first time in his unconventional life, a warm buzz pooled through Peter’s bloodstream. One of the major side effects? Debuffs to superspeed. Which proved an otherworldly experience. If not a little uncomfortable. Still worth it, for a one-night-only lesson in drunkenness.

Peering lazily into his red solo cup, Peter blinked. His eyes followed swirls of neon cyan. Luminous in its irradiated glow. He couldn’t comprehend the science behind Hank’s glowstick booze. But he knew it filtered through his body at a much slower rate than other substances. The drink felt syrupy on his tongue, and tasted like - coincidentally enough - candy corn. Its effects proved weaker than Peter expected.

Given his cells operated so incomprehensibly fast, Peter didn’t find this too surprising. So, what? He’d never get frat party wasted. Oh well. Peter came to accept that fact about himself forever ago. Still, fluorescent booze made him mellow enough to slow down a lot. Peter could totally vibe with mellow. No complaints there. Mellow’s copacetic. He definitely owed Beastie for his magic potion of slow-mo. Peter oscillated between a nice, tipsy balance. Muddled enough to let loose and enjoy himself. But conscious enough to avoid making any ultra stupid decisions.

Or, he thought so, anyway.

Hobbling around the mansion, Peter pushed through crowds of partygoers. All dressed in their spookiest, sexiest, or most low-effort costumes. Twinkles of orange and violet lights kept the mansion somewhat lit. With spoOoOoOoOoky decorations scattered amongst the school. A perfectly campy atmosphere for Halloween. Oh. And those decorations? All Peter’s doing. Of course, it’s no surprise the professor deemed him prime event decorator. He took mere microseconds to spice up an entire plot of land. Throwing forth all his effort, Peter dressed the building in balls-to-the-walls, haunting decor.

Fake spiders with prickly fur lay strewn about in random places. Ghosts made of old, torn sheets swayed in the breeze. Skeletons hanged by the dozens. Streamers of orange and faded black dangled from the ceilings and doorways. String lights lined the mansion’s trim. Outside on the grounds, Peter even garnished the grass with inflatable Snoopys.

During his decorative escapades, he cracked jokes to the kids. Peter asked, “You guys think the Great Pumpkin’ll show up?”

They squealed with laughter, stomping their little feet. Candy buckets in hand, the kids yelled, “Mr. Maximoff, the Great Pumpkin’s not real!!”

In the midst of rearranging another Snoopy, he gasped, “WHAT?! He is too real!! Better not let him hear you say that!”

A haunted trail veered off into the woods surrounding the mansion. It led to an old barn, stocked full of hay and populated with jack-o-lanterns. All carved by the mutant kiddos themselves. Another set of glittering lights decorated the barn, creating an autumn glow. A pair of giant speakers - Peter paid for them, mind you - roared Halloween tunes over the entire property.

Cool stuff. Talk about a hell of a set-up. Peter couldn’t help but be proud of himself. Such a slew of decorations might put even Scrooge Mcduck himself in holiday spirits.

Wait. No. What? Scrooge Mcduck? Wasn’t he more of a Christmas thing? Fuck. Peter might be more mixed up than he thought. He gazed absentmindedly into his red solo cup again. Blinking slowly, he wondered…what the hell did Hank put in this disco concoction anyway?

Whatever. By the end of the night, Peter hoped the kids got a kick out of his hard work. Not that he broke a sweat putting it all together or anything. But he wanted to live up to his awesome teacher reputation. The highest of honors, really. No way he’d let anyone else trump him on that front.

Then again… Peter nibbled his lip, grinning to himself like a huge doofus. He took another long swig of his drink. Candy corn sweetness tickled his taste buds.

Okay. So, he might’ve had someone else in mind while he decorated. Somebody he desperately wanted to impress. A lot. Or, just a little bit, actually. Like, on a microscopic level. Maybe.

That somebody? You. Except, not really. No way.

Pffffttt…he definitely didn’t do it for you. C’mon! Why would he? Think of the kids! Those precious, lil demon spawn! They practically worshiped him. They’re what it’s all about, right? Riiiight.

Peter’s holiday decorations tempted any passing trick-or-treaters to drop by. And the professor prepared quite the spectacle of treats for them too. King sized, candy bars and all. Hank and Raven - showing off their mutant glory without an ounce of shame - passed the candy out to children.

Human children.

Magneto - still unaware he had a son sprinting around the mansion on any given day - dubbed the gesture hopeless naivety. Or something along those lines. Inviting humans to join in on a night of mutant fun? Totally bogus. Which…yeah. From Erik’s perspective? Fair enough.

“You think they’ll learn to accept you through meaningless, holiday gestures?” Erik griped, arms crossed, “Don’t be ridiculous.”

Raven merely rolled her eyes. She made a comment about the inherent innocence of children. Erik didn’t appear to care. He groused some more after that. But Peter didn’t hear much of it. Nor did he imagine he even wanted to. At least, not tonight. Maybe once Peter sobered up a bit, he wouldn’t mind lending an ear. If his father ever felt the need to open up about his woeful turmoil.

But Erik disappeared upstairs. Out of sight. Still in hiding, all alone. Poor dude.

Unlike his misguided papa, Peter didn’t mind human inclusion so much. One: because he considered himself a pretty open minded guy. Easy to say, since he didn’t harbor anything remotely comparable to his father’s trauma.

And two, on a less serious note: Human girls. They gravitated towards Peter like moths to a flame.

Throughout the mansion, the theme to Killer Klowns from Outer Space rang. Conversations buzzed around Peter like radio static. Candy corn booze made it impossible for him to comprehend them. Some partygoers played wallflower. Idling by snack tables, feasting on as much junk food as their stomachs could handle. It took every ounce of restraint Peter had, not to raid those tables himself.

Peter’s Terminator costume wasn’t much of a costume at all, really. It left most of the ladies confused. He didn’t recognize half the costumed cuties who pulled him in for dances. But they sure as hell recognized him. When another pretty girl pressed herself against him - tits bouncing, and bare thighs rubbing his pants - she’d ask the dreaded words, “What’re youuuu supposed to be?” Twirling her hair and giving Peter fluttery bedroom eyes.

Peter gave the same responses every time. Covered head to toe in black clothing, wearing a pair of sunglasses; he raised a prop shotgun from his back, responding with his best Arnold impression.

“I’ll be back.” Right on the money, Peter thought in his buzzed haze. Totally accurate. One to one.

If the girlies didn’t get the reference? So be it. Peter ultimately felt like a massive dork. But he got some sexually charged groovin’ out of it. A bit of groping here or there. He didn’t mind taking the L, if it meant grabbing some ass in the process.

But as the party clamored on, Peter knew he wanted only one thing.

To find you. Just to hang out, catch up, and have an innocent time. No other reason. Seriously. Honest. Why else would he wanna find you? To mess around a little bit? Nahhh. Why would he wanna fool around with you? And risk a long term friendship? He couldn't have that.

Not when you carried enough patience to put up with his day-to-day bullshit. Always listening to his senseless ramblings. Even if he spoke too fast for you to keep up.

During his lunch breaks on school days, Peter usually spent time with you. The two of you talked in the kitchen, or chillaxed in the lounge. Those chats? The highlight of his day. As corny as it seemed. He just couldn’t resist you and your kindly wiles. The wiles of his colleague. His…very pretty colleague. His…very pretty… platonic colleague.

Someone please end his misery now.

Peter wandered aimlessly. He danced his heart out and chatted up some more cute gals. Soon enough, he found you. Leaned over a set of snack tables, you picked through sugary sweet treats. Peter noticed the way you swayed in place. A little heavy footed like him, eh? He snickered to himself, sneaking up behind you.

Lacking any filter or restraint, Peter blatantly gawked at your ass. A fitted, white gown draped your body. Flowing in an angelic fashion, it harmonized with your every curve. Even tipsy, Peter recognized your costume the microsecond he saw it. Princess Leia. Star Wars. Episode IV. Very sexy. Beyond sexy, even.

A flirtatious whistle caught you by surprise. You whirled around with a doe eyed look on your face. A kind of gaze that made his brain turn to mush. As if the alcohol hadn’t already. You licked the frosting off a funky colored cupcake, as Peter’s gaze flitted down your body. His eyes followed the smooth creases of your gown. A tasteful peek of your thigh kept his attention locked. Until the perky tease of your nipples captivated him instead.

Awesome. Amazing. 11/10. Best night ever.

“Ohmygosh!” You laughed, reaching out to touch Peter’s chest for whatever reason. Not that he minded one bit, “Peeeter, I’m sooooo sorry! I’m a little tipsy right now! It’s really unprofessional!”

Scarlet bloomed in his cheeks, burning hot enough to make him dizzier. Peter ogled you like the last Twinkie on the planet. A dollop of frosting caught the plush of your lip. You swirled it away with your tongue. Drawing in a hitched breath, Peter blinked.

Focus. He needed to focus on anything else. Not the parts of you he wanted to be on, inside of, and all other configurations of carnality.

“And?? You wanna hear somethin’ cray-crayyy?” Peter asked, lamely slurring his words. He raised his red solo cup, waving it in a clumsy motion, “So am I, princess! I’m totally hammered. And I looooove it!” He threw his head back, belting a loud, “WHOOOOO!!” Feeling more like a free spirit than he had in years.

Moving closer, you couldn't control your laughs. You shushed Peter, keeping your hand on his chest. Patting you on the shoulder, Peter chuckled. He feigned offense, but his sizeable hand lingered on you. A thumb grazed the soft cloth of your dress. For a beat, he wondered what you looked like under it.

“Whyyyy?? Why should I keep it down, huh?? It’s a party, baby! Everybody’s yellin’!” He shrugged. Peter smirked, throwing his head back again. He shouted another, “WHOOOOO!!”

A crowd of partygoers kept their eyes on the two of you. Their gazes lingering for a little longer than necessary. You snickered again. So tipsy, you could hardly get a word in through your giggling.

“You really are drunk, oh my gosh. You’re crazy, Peter! I can’t even-” Dropping your head into his chest, you erupted in woozy huffs of laughter. Great. He loved the closeness, “Peter, sorry, I’m sooooooo-”

“Mind-blowingly hot?” Peter lazily blinked, “Because yer-...you-ohhhh, man. You look really hot. Like-” He made a meaningless gesture with his hands, shaking his head, “Like, WOW! Have you seen yourself? Someone tell ‘Ro to make it rain. ‘Cuz yer on fiiiiiiire!” He joked. Cheesy and lame, but too smashed to even care.

You scoffed, cheeks set ablaze, “Oh, please! Give me a break! Mister Terminator casanova over here. Are you trying to butter me up like you did all those other ladies?” Playfully, you pushed off his chest. Peter mourned the loss of your touch, “I saw you! Getting all handsy out there!” You said, your tone lighthearted. Still accusatory.

Somehow, you recognized his costume. That caught him a little off guard. Peter’s heart did some kinda funny, fluttery thing. Jumpy, warm, and beating beating beating in his chest. But…nah. Couldn’t be because of you. Could it? Maybe the booze did it. Yeah. Irradiated Beast hooch must’ve give him palpitations. He’d tell Hank about this side effect later.

Peter arched a silver brow, “Oh, yeah? Mmmhm. Sounds like yer just jealous. ‘Cuz the ladies find my inner Schwarzenegger, action hero totally irresistible.” Bullshit. Most of them thought he dressed as Neo from the Matrix. Wrong action movie. Peter kept talking out his ass, “I bet it drives you up a wall to see ‘em all over me like that.”

“Oh, you think? Suuure. Like Leia would ever have the hots for some dollar store Terminator.” You teased affectionately, “Likely story, Quickie.” Fuck. Quickie. He loved when you called him that. You deceived your own protests, pressing your body against Peter's.

Your nails dug into his shirt as you palmed his chest. So…you wanted to play this little game now, huh? Alright. Fine. Peter bickered back and forth with you for an indiscernible amount of time. Standing in a corner by the snack tables, away from the noisy, party bustle. Unbalanced and wobbly, Peter leaned in. Keeping you both pressed together in a way too intimate for wandering eyes.

He almost spilled his neon concoction on your dress. Exchanging giggles again, Peter lingered even closer. His lips on the cusp of reaching out for yours. But in a clouded moment of self awareness, he stopped himself short.

“D-Do you…uhhhh-” He swallowed dryly. His nerves buzzed all through his body, “Y’wanna…get outta here? Maybe go do somethin’ reallllyyyy dumb? Like-uh…maybe make a mistake you’ll regret in the morning?” Peter suggested, wiggling his brows.

You gave him another lidded look, igniting a blistering fire deep in his bones. With your body still pressed to his - bodacious and oh-so-tempting - you brought a hand up. A beat of silence passed, as you moved his sunglasses up over his hair. Silver strands fell loose. You gazed into his puppy dog eyes directly.

“And what makes you think I’d regret it?” You asked, your voice smooth and somewhat slurred. Oh...were you being real with him right now?

Your fingers traced flirty circles over his chest. Scorching flames in Peter’s heart burned warmth through his veins. Heat gathered in his groin. Peter’s eyes widened to a planetary degree. Clutching his solo cup a little too tight, he brushed your ass with his other hand. By accident. He only intended to pull you closer. You held his intoxicated gaze.

Peter let his lips ghost yours again, without any direct connection.

“See, that’s-uhhh…hah…that’s just the booze talkin’.” He whispered with a soft chuckle. Steadily, he pulled himself from you, “Wanna know what it’s tellin’ me?” Peter gave you another lazy grin, nibbling his lip, “Youuuuuu and meee…” He sluggishly said. He dragged you along with him. Stumbling backwards, “...should-uh…gooooo have some…adult fun, yeah? A little romp in the hay?”

Did you know he meant that verbatim? Probably not.

Moments later, Peter clumsily navigated through the party. He made a beeline for the entrance hall, holding your hand the entire way. Floundering with every step, he traversed the crowded halls. Through each doorway the two of you passed, fluttering streamers dangled above. Soft tissue brushed across your face, tickling your nose.

The streamers proved more unkind to Peter. Staggering through the last doorway, he became tangled in them. Peter tried to shake the tissue off, twisting around and flailing his arms. He cursed aloud, making a spectacle of his embarrassing predicament. Caught in a web of orange and black, he looked like a Halloween decoration all his own. The streamers wrapped around his body and arms, even covering his head.

“MOTHER FU-” He cursed, jerking the tissue down with a rough tug. Peter tripped forward in the process. But he caught himself just in time. Compensating for his humiliation, he laughed, “I’m okay! I’m okay! Allllll good, guys. I’m good. Totally good! Meant to do that, actually.” Peter cleared his throat. He averted his glassy gaze from any partygoers nearby.

One of them being Hank, who stood alongside Raven. The two shared a few drinks and quietly chatted. The big, beast of man wore torn, red flannel. His blue fur peeked out from the undone buttons, appearing frayed. His costume? A smurf werewolf. A smurfwolf. Or something. Peter couldn't tell. And Raven? She hadn’t dressed up at all. Labeling Halloween: The one time of year she chose not to disguise herself. Why? Because, in her words, "It's funnier that way."

Raven stifled a laugh at Peter’s expense. But Hank didn’t hold himself back. He roared a rumbling chuckle, “I see the serum’s treating you well, Peter!” Hank teased, cradling a drink in his fluffy paw, “Why, it certainly looks that way. You seem to be having-uhm…fun? Yes! Fun. I'm delighted to see it!"

Peter idled in the middle of the doorway, swaying a little on his feet. Forgoing the streamers, he left them tangled around his limbs. Fuck it. His costume could use some added flair.

“I’m havin’ a-uhhhhh…a total blast, Beast my mannn!” Peter slurred. He passed Hank on his way out the mansion’s entrance. And roughly patted the scientist on the shoulder, “Thanks again, buddy ol’ pal! I owe you one!”

You giggled, beaming an elated smile as Peter dragged you out the door. Once you flew ungracefully by, Hank and Raven both did double takes. They gave you cautious looks, as if to say - uh, do you think this is a good idea? A little too sloshed, you failed to register their concern. Following Peter out the door with an inelegant skip in your step, you waved the pair goodbye.

“Well, now…that’s certainly going to be awkward for him tomorrow morning.” Hank joked, looking down at his drink. He swirled the beverage, the cup appearing itty bitty in his clutch. Showing off a crowd of snaggle teeth, he yawned.

Raven shook her head, scoffing, “Oh, it’ll bite him in the ass later. That’s for sure.” She added, sipping her own drink, “You proud of yourself?” Raven quipped, arching an orange brow. Hank held up a single claw, playful in his self defense.

“Not my fault! I gave him that serum because I thought he could have fun with it! And he is! Didn’t you see him? What he does under its influence is completely out of my jurisdiction!” Hank shrugged, stating in a matter-of-fact way, “I’ll have you know, I did try to warn him!”

In hindsight, Peter should have heeded Hank’s warnings. What he did under the effects of disco liquor proved supremely stupid. The nanosecond your feet hit the grass outside, he lost any restraint he had left. Peter kissed you full on. Ushering your sweet lips into an alcohol induced session of heavy smooching. Tongues interweaving, lackadaisical and reckless, the two of you shared careless kisses. Under decorative spider webs and amongst inflatable Snoopys.

But no Great Pumpkin in sight.

You slung your arms over Peter’s broad shoulders, letting him devour you. His sizable hands slid over your hips. He pulled you closer as he stumbled like a complete klutz. Thick fingers curled into the cloth of your dress. Caught up in the heat of the moment, Peter didn’t dare consider any consequences. With no filter to hold him back, one of his palms felt for your breast. He copped a handful, before you stopped him in his tracks. You tore your lips from his candy corn kisses.

“Heyyyy! Hey, hey, hey! Not here! What are you even doing??” You laughed, giving his nose an affectionate nuzzle, “Someone might see us, doofus!”

Peter hummed, pulling you against him in a more firm grip. He stole frantic kisses, heated and mouthy. Squeezing your hips, his nails scratched across your gown to your ass. Kneading your plush cheeks with little shame.

“So what? Let ‘em enjoy the show!” Peter snickered, diving in for yet another kiss, “I’m not gonna miss out on a chance to touch you like this. Now that I finally got you…”

Rolling your eyes, you didn’t seem to take him seriously. In an attempt to pull yourself away again, you stumbled backwards in the grass. Even with his reaction time outta wack, Peter managed to catch you before you fell. In one awkward motion, he scooped you up bridal style and carried you into the woods. The streamers coiled around his limbs came loose, at long last. Flitting away behind him in the wind.

He held you in his strong arms, following the mansion’s haunted, Halloween trail. The hayride already closed down for the night, leaving the trail - and the barn - open for some private necking.

Finding his way to the barn, Peter wobbled, slowing his stride. In his arms, you took a moment to admire the decorations he put so much effort into. Orange, twinkling lights lined the barn’s entryway. Vibrant in late night darkness. Magical, and kinda romantic. Through the trees in the distance, the garnished mansion appeared visible. A Halloweeny spectacle, engulfed in simulated fog.

Party music echoed from afar, faint, but clear enough he could hear. Peter perked up, overhearing a classic, Hallow’s eve tune.

“‘CUZ THIS IS THRILLLAHHHH!” Peter shouted off key, moving backwards into the barn. His steps were careless, “THRILLAH NIIIIGHT!” He sang, falling into a bed of cool hay. Strands of straw bounced in the air. You came down with him, and he kept singing, “AND NO ONE’S GONNA SAVE YA-” He cut himself off, leaning in to feast on your lips. Peter cradled you in his arms, humming Thriller amidst awkward kisses.

You laid bridal style over his legs, dipping your head back. Inviting Peter to devour your neck like a thirsty vampire. Without all the grace of Bela Lugosi. More like a hammered Nosferatu. If either of you had second thoughts, Peter couldn’t find it in himself to give a shit. He left that baggage behind. In the morning, sober Peter could unpack it all. Right now, he wanted his hands on your body, under your dress.

“Ohhhh~! Oh my-” You moaned, tacking on an erotic squeal of his name. Giggling in a kittenish tone. The sound made him wanna bite you harder, “W-Wait-...Peter, maybe we shouldn’t-oooooh~! Maybe we shouldn’t be-”

His sloppy kisses cut your hesitance short. Peter nodded his head in a lazy, loose motion. Bringing more dizziness upon himself.

“Mmmm? What? No-...” He hummed, “Baby, we should. We definitely should. Don’t even worry-” Peter paused for an abrupt beat. Holding you tight, he adjusted in the hay. Uncomfortable, Peter knitted his brows, “Wait-...this hay’s so-...why’s this hay so fuckin’ itchy, man?”

At the chime of your silly snorts and giggles, Peter’s words became lost on him. Whatever. It didn’t matter anymore. He couldn’t think clearly enough to recall them. Instead, he drew his attention back to you. Peter’s lips found your neck once more. Your floral scent replenished his lungs, a lifesource he desperately needed. Hot kisses peppered down your chest. In his clouded stupor, Peter buried his face between your breasts.

He loved the flustered squeal you made in response. Enough that he couldn’t help but do it again.

“Ohhhhh…hot damn, baby.” Peter groaned into your chest, motorboating your knockers. A graceless gesture. Lifting his face, his hair appeared a disheveled mess, “Yer so awesome, y’know that? Liiiike…yer really great. I know I’m pretty drunk right now, but-uhhhh…” He slurred, sneaking thick fingers under your dress, “I do mean it. No joke. I think yer really cool. Cool and-uhm…and-uh…hahaaa….I really like you.”

You erupted in more buzzed giggles, parting your lips to protest his drunken confession. But Peter silenced you with shushes, “Shhhhhhhh! Shhhhh, don’t-” He hiccuped. Your laughs were so contagious, he couldn’t help but giggle as well, “Shhhh! Don’t tell anybody!”

“I won’t! I won’t!” You chuckled, gently holding his cheeks. You pulled him down for more smooches, lips meeting in a slower embrace, “I like you too, Peter…but shhhhhh…keep it a secret.”

His fingertips danced along your inner thigh, clumsy and unsteady. Peter’s hand disappeared between your legs and under your gown. Hot digits grazed your panties. A flimsy, soaked piece of fabric awaited those digits. Breathing a low huff, Peter whispered, “Fuck.” into your neck. The steamy word tickled your skin, giving you chills.

Blindly, he wormed his fingers into your panties. Peter dipped his digits into your honeyed heat. Thick, syrupy cushions sealed around him. He focused on parting your tight walls. A little too uncoordinated to pleasure you in a more ideal way. Rough, repetitive motions curled at an awkward angle. Digging so deep, Peter could hear the squishy call of your insides - leaking wet, all for him.

Your body tensed, knees spreading on instinct. Cool air caressed your thighs. Peering down into your lidded, baby doll eyes, he held your gaze. As your cunt pulsed around his digits, soft and constricting, he knitted his brows. Humming another groan, Peter dove down for your neck. He sucked mouthy, wet hickies into your skin. Leaving gifts for sober you to discover later tomorrow.

Speaking of sober.

Sober Peter never had trouble keeping up with anybody. Moreover, everyone else found it impossible to keep up with him. But in his buzzed daze, he could barely follow your lead. One blink, and his fingers buried themselves to the knuckle in your cunt. The next blink, you took initiative. Throwing him for a loop, you changed positions. You pushed Peter further back into the hay, straddling his lap.

As you fumbled for his jeans and pulled them open, more giggling ensued. Heated tension hung over the two of you like those glimmering, barn lights. You felt around, guiding your hand to a hot thickness in his pants. It rested in a curly bed of silver hairs, limp and untouched. Your giggles ceased, and your expression shifted.

“Peter, you’re not even-” You started, squeezing the softness of him in your hand. You gave him a few loose tugs, your voice teeming with hesitance, “Are you…are you sure you want-”

“Yeaaaahhhhh. Yeah. Yanno, it’s just-...I never thought I’d be the one gettin’ whiskey dick. Haha.” Peter joked, a low chuckle rumbling in his throat. Buzzed and uncoordinated, Peter harbored little patience for foreplay. His fingers sought for your weeping heat again. He pushed them through your soft, supple pussy lips, “Sucks a lot. I was really hopin’ I’d get to-uhmmm…ahahaaaa…” He bit his tongue, laughing, “Really wanted to show you a good fuckin’ time. But this shit feels like rocket science right now, sorry…”

Eventually, through sheer determination, you worked up enough sorcery to liven him up. Waking his cock from its soft slumber. Peter fumbled, clumsily guiding his dick to your flowery mound. It took some serious concentration on his part to do so. His tongue poked between his lips, brows furrowed tight. He leered between your sweltering bodies. Humid air clung to his skin, contrasting the sharp coolness of an October’s night. The smell of booze permeated in your sweat, mingling with the scent of your perfume.

You sank over his cock, taking the now raging length of him fluidly. He bottomed out in a single intake of breath. Peter moaned, rolling his hips upward. Your fluttery walls stretched, cozy and soft around his dick. He dropped his head back into the hay, howling a goofy shout. It echoed through the trees, catching autumn wind.

"OHHHHHHH~! THAT'S IT! WHOOOOOO~!" He yelled. Peter chewed his lip hard, meeting your bounces with sluggish thrusts, "That's it. That's what I'm fuckin' talkin' about. Hoh-fuck..."

His rhythm was a little off beat, but he blamed the booze. Clenching the fabric of your dress in his fingers, he bunched it up tight. As if to hold you by horse’s reins, arduously guiding you on your ride.

Far in the back of his mind. Like, so far, Peter may as well have been on another planet. He had his first conflicting thought. Screwing you for the first time like this - hammered and careless - struck him as kind of…wrong. Really, he should have waited it out, and done this sober. But Peter couldn’t deny himself either.

"Peter, ohhh~! Feels really good~!" Your squeals of erotic, but sluggish pleasure sounded too much like music. Now cemented as one of his all time favorite songs, "Sooo good, I-aaahhh~!"

The bubbly feeling brought upon by Beast liquor made his body burn with ecstasy. His cock throbbed inside you, loving the tight embrace of your walls. Pleasure burned to an incomprehensible level of intensity.

Even your dress felt unreasonably soft on his skin. Peter moaned again, drilling your cunt in unsteady surges of carnal bliss. He breathed thickly, the air between the two of you now sweltering. Choking on air, he kept his slow pace. His cock dug tunnels through your walls at a slacking speed. Completely unnatural for him. But overflowing with intoxication, he thrived in it.

“N-Not gonna-” Peter laughed. His voice a rough, breathless mess of incoherency. Sticky heat flushed his cheeks, and his tone wavered, “‘M not-...god…not gonna last. Fuck. Oh my fucking-” He swallowed another groan, suffocating on it. Peter’s hips rolled, their movement leisurely, “Sooooo tight. Feels like yer tryna-...like yer gonna-...aaaahaaaaafuck.”

Playing with your pearly clit, you squealed. The swollen nub burned, tingling as you circled it. With difficulty focusing, Peter brought his head up. He watched your little fingers while you pleasured yourself. His lidded, dark eyes stared, so spacy, so clouded. A growl caught in the back of his throat. You toyed with yourself a little longer, spreading glossy slickness under your fingers.

Your whines stayed at a respectable volume. Quiet enough, no one outside the barn could hear. But Peter refused to keep his enthusiastic voice down. He dug his big hands into your hips, fingernails clenching your dress. Scratching rough lines into the white cloth.

"Fuck, you gonna-...you gonna keep touchin' yourself like that? Gonna cum for me?" His words slurred. Peter used his immeasurable strength to hold you in place. Stuffing his cock through your pussy’s luscious, spongy grip. He fucked you in lethargic, but needy ruts, "P-Please-ohmygod-...please cum for me, baby. Lemme hear it, please?"

"Noooo~! Pe-ahhhh~! Peter, I cannnn't! Someone might-...Peter I can't-" You whimpered. Swirling your clit, you pushed yourself even further towards climax. A delightful, oncoming wave of scorching pleasure surged in your body. Sizzling through your veins, "OH, FUCK, QUICKIE~!" A sharp squeal bounced from your throat, as Peter surprised you.

"FUCK!! Yeah? You sound so fuckin'-Ah-...Yer so fuckin' good for me. Don't hold back, baby. Wanna-ohhhh~! Wanna hear you scream. Don't you fuckin' hold back-" Moving suddenly fast, he slammed his cock in deeper. His cherry red dick shattered your poor cervix. Burying himself to the brim, he slapped your mound hard with sharp pounds of his pelvis, "Mmmmmmfucking-...gonna fuckin'....aaaahhaha..."

Peter’s body tensed. His heels scuffed along the ground, crushing hay under his boots as he braced his feet. More loose strands tickled his skin where his shirt bunched up. Making him itchy again. But his intoxicated rutting never dwindled. He whined again, his voice cracking. Ruthless, quickening grinds of his cock knocked you hard. Sending you straight into a dimension of overwhelming, euphoric pleasure.

As tremors hummed across your sweaty skin, bliss ruptured deep in your core. At that moment, Peter forgot to consider any further risks. He burst with a hot, white pop of gluey heat. Rocking your sore cunt in sloppy, shallow thrusts. Peter soaked his dick in your sweet, inebriated love. The scent of booze and sex simmered in his nostrils. Lifting his hips, he met you in one or two more reckless, offbeat bounces.

Barely conscious of reality, Peter panted. Lying with you in a clumsy heap, he shared lazy kisses and steamy breaths with you. Had he been anymore sober, Peter would’ve rushed you off to the nearest bathroom. In dire need of a minute’s recovery, he laid there. Splayed out, Peter’s limbs rested loose and flimsy. The seconds passed, and he sobered up quickly. Post-orgasmic haziness began to clear.

You snuggled up next to him, grazing his cheek with your nose. The scent of alcohol lingered on your breath. Remind Peter that, unlike him, you were probably still a little drunk.

“You okay?” You asked out of the blue, tickling his neck with a giggle, “What are you thinking about? You’re not second guessing yourself already, are you?” Your fingers toyed with the zipper of his jacket. Which he gave you to wear in the cold, shortly after fucking you senseless.

In the distance, the faint roar of the party continued on. Rustling from inside the mansion and seemingly endless. Peter stayed silent, before snickering. He turned his head to the side, returning your nuzzles with a kiss. His lips met your hair. The smell of your conditioner made his heart skip a beat for some reason.

“Nothin’. It’s not-” He shrugged, turning his head again. Peter stared up at the glittering string lights hanging in the barn. His coffee bean eyes jumped from twinkle to twinkle, “It’s not super important. Kinda weird to be thinkin’ about it after-uh…” His voice trailed off again. Peter cleared his throat, feeling his cheeks flush, “Seriously, no big deal.”

You rolled onto your back, watching the lights sway in a cool breeze, “You sure?” You laughed, humming an, “Uh ohhh!” Before you continued, “Did somebody sober up and realize he made a dumb mistake? Hehe…” You teased, though he could hear the sliver of hesitance in your tone. A beat of silence passed, and you hugged his jacket closer.

“Regret wh-...huh? Nahhh, baby. You kiddin’? That was awesome.” He snickered awkwardly. Peter brought his hands to his face. He sighed, “I-uh…I was just thinkin’ about how…I could be spendin’ this holiday with my dad. I mean, shit…maybe he wouldn’t wanna spend it with me, but-”

He assumed you might take offense to this. Wouldn't it come off as a little inconsiderate? To think about his dad right now. After such an intimate moment between the two of you. But being the understanding person you were, you rolled over to face him. Drawing gentle lines into his shirt, you snuggled up close to him again.

“Is that where you wanna be right now? With your dad?” You asked, your tone gentle.

Peter swallowed, pinching the bridge of his nose. A pounding headache swarmed him from nowhere. The repercussions of Beast hooch. Hopefully, such ailments would pass just as quickly as he sobered up.

“I-...yeah? I guess? But…it’s not like I can just-...like, I can’t go see him. Since he still doesn’t know about me, y’know? It’d be weird if I just showed up on Halloween. Like, hey, man, wanna hang out? Goddammit.” Peter shook his head, sitting up fully in the hay. Straw-like strands stuck to his clothes. He brushed them away.

“Well…hey, I got an idea, yeah?” You tried to follow his lead, sitting upward. Swaying a little as you did, Peter could tell you were still on the edge of tipsy. You giggled, “Let’s go inside. And I’ll…try to get everyone together for a movie. Maybe a horror? And you can run off! Go find him. Use the movie as an excuse. Offer him the opportunity to come down and watch. Sound good?”

It didn’t. Erik wasn’t the type to indulge in such activities. Still, Peter smiled fondly at your consideration. Nodding, he stood to his feet in a flash. You blinked, finding yourself lying bridal style in his arms again. With a hand to his chin, you tilted his head down. Pressing a soft kiss to his lips.

“Thanks…” He hummed, his half lidded eyes gazing down into yours, “I really did have…such an awesome time with you. I haven't done that kinda thing with anybody in a while. But lemme-uh…” Peter bashfully chuckled, “Lemme get you to a bathroom so you can clean up, 'kay? ”

After the surprisingly deep chat he shared with you, Peter rushed you off to a mansion bathroom. Leaning against a wall, he waited outside the door. As the party settled and people filed out into the streets, he became more nervous. The two of you spent the rest of the night together, by the other’s side. Treating each other as normally as you would any other day. Soon, you sobered up enough to gather the X-family for a late night movie.

Peter took your advice, despite expecting the worst. Zipping upstairs and all through the mansion, he searched for his estranged father. To Peter’s surprise, Erik caught him off guard with a yes. But before he made his way downstairs, Peter took a moment to chat with him. He asked Erik how he was doing, and what he’d been up to. Ever since he chose the mansion for a temporary hideout (an arrangement most everybody felt uncomfortable with).

Erik - for good reason - wasn’t the most emotionally open. He kept their conversation short, before dismissing Peter. They both caught up with everyone else in the living room. The X-family sat together with snacks and drinks, joined for a movie. Erik chose a spot next to Peter on one of the sofas. Something he hadn’t anticipated at all. Since he didn’t get much out of the guy too often, he felt he could settle for his company, at least.

Sitting at Peter's other side, you eventually passed out. You rested your head on his lap, and he raked his fingers through your hair. By the time the movie ended, everyone veered off for bed. At last, calling Hallow’s eve quits. But Erik remained. He spoke to Peter a little while longer. Chatting about nothing at all, and everything at once.

Come next morning, Peter stood tiredly in the mansion kitchen. It was an unreasonably cold Monday in November. Freezing weather seemed to hit Westchester out of nowhere. He held a mug full of coffee, milky white and loaded with enough sugar to send anyone else to the hospital. Scratching his head over a mess of silver hair, Peter yawned. Even though he had more important things to worry about, he couldn't stop thinking about last night. For several reasons.

The impromptu bonding time he spent with his father lingered in his mind. Even if said father didn’t know what their interactions meant to Peter. It happened all thanks to your tipsy encouragement. Peter knew, even sober, you would’ve pushed him to do the same. Because you cared about him that much. Always inspiring him to step out of his comfort zone.

Aside from the estranged dad stuff, Peter couldn’t stop thinking about you. And the more…steamy moments the two of you shared. Intimate interactions he still hadn’t sat down and discussed with you. Peter didn't have a clue what that little fling meant to you. Or if it meant anything at all. Distracting himself, he focused his attention elsewhere. Like the Halloween decorations littered about the mansion. He planned to take them down today after classes.

You came padding downstairs and into the kitchen not even five minutes later.

“Gooooood morning!” You cheerily said, blinking your sleepy eyes. Groaning, you brought a hand to your head. Your fingers touched your temple, “You know what’s surprising? I actually don’t have that bad of a hangover!”

Peter’s heart did flips, and he felt his stomach tangle in knots. Humming into his coffee, he threw you a casual nod of his head. Play it cool, “Mmmm. That’s good, though, right?”

You headed straight for the cabinets, standing on your toes to reach the highest one. You flailed around for the near-empty tub of coffee grounds. He left it up there without any consideration for short, mansion inhabitants like you. Totally absent-minded. Peter almost felt thankful he did. As you reached, the itty bitty, sleep shorts you wore rose by a touch. The cheeks of your ass caught his eye. Your bottom appeared etched in faint scratches, painted with red splotches. Damn…what the hell did he do to you last night?

Sipping his coffee with a groggy look on his face, Peter grinned.

Man alive, he wanted to screw you sober. Doing it drunk really wasn’t enough. Quickly, he dismissed that thought. Filing it away in his scatterbrained memory for later.

“Did you talk to Erik last night?” You asked, pulling Peter from his not-so-safe-for-work thoughts. You stretched a little further up, really reaching for that tin tub of Folgers.

Peter blinked, “Sorry, what?”

“Erik. I asked if you talked to him last night? Because I kinda remember you two having a chat. But then again, I was pretty out of it!” Your shorts hugged the shape of your cunt as you stood on your toes. An ache stirred in his groin, but he shook it off. Holy shit. What were you trying to accomplish here?

Peter’s heart skipped twenty beats. Sifting through the disorganized cabinets in his brain, he retrieved his previous thought. Ah, yeah. Screwing you sober? Not a want, but a need at this point. Focus, Quickie. He needed to focus. Especially if you planned on talking about something as important as his father.

“Uhhhh…” He ran a hand through his messy locks, taking a moment to process his racing thoughts, “Yeah, we talked. Not a lot, though. I meant to say thanks for that, by the way. Since I didn’t get to last night…” Peter brought his mug to his lips, averting his gaze, “Really. Thanks a lot. Don’t think we woulda had that time together, if you hadn’t pushed me to ask him 'n stuff.”

Still struggling to reach for that tin, you sighed. Your heels hit the floor, as you lowered your arm and turned to meet Peter’s eyes. Your sweet voice brought him an unexpected feeling of comfort.

“Hey, anytime, Peter! I know it’s been really hard for you. Seeing him around here lately. And you don’t need me to tell you the obvious. But-” You timidly gazed down at your toes, shrugging. Peter knew exactly what you were about to say, before you parted your lips to say it.

Something along the lines of: Maybe it’s finally time you told him the truth. Or whatever.

It was too early for this kinda deep, introspective talk. Peter didn’t give you the chance to continue. Setting aside his mug on a countertop, he appeared by your side in a fwip. The breeze from his abrupt movement tickled your cheeks. He reached into the cabinet for the tub of coffee grounds. Handing it off to you with a tired, hooded expression. He sluggishly grinned.

“We got class in, like, twenty minutes.” Peter interrupted, and you took the bait. Whether you knew of his intent to dissuade the previous conversation, he couldn’t tell.

“Oh! Yeah! Shit!” You slapped a hand over your forehead. Peter gazed down at you, admiring your early morning features, “I’m so screwed!” Not yet you’re not, “I totally forgot to put together a lesson plan! I don’t know what the hell I’m gonna do today!” Well…you could always do him. Again.

Jeez. Dude. No. The hell’s wrong with him?? Be reasonable, guy! At least take your buddy out to dinner first. Which...yeah. Might be time to think about asking you on a real date.

“Yeahhh. I kinda forgot too. Had a bunch of other stuff on my mind, yanno?” Peter said, completely lethargic. He shrugged, “I’m so bad at my job, man.” He kept his eyes on you, as you threw together your own pot of coffee.

“Actually, that’s bullshit. And I think you know it too. You’re amazing at it. That’s why all the kids love you so much.” You replied. Smiling like you meant every word. Because you did. Man, why'd you have to be so freakin' sweet?

Early morning sunlight beamed through the windows. It bathed your hair and face in sparkling gold. Peter wanted to kick himself for swooning. He opted to change subjects.

“I gotta take these decorations down eventually.” He said, gesturing to the streamers hanging from the kitchen ceiling. For an instant, he remembered tangling himself in them last night, “I keep puttin’ it off. But it’s gotta happen sooner ‘er later.” Taking initiative, he reached up to tear some of them down. Balling them up in his hands.

“I could help you! If you need an extra hand!” You offered, innocently sipping your coffee. Peter took in the curl of your lips as you smiled. He cleared his throat, chuckling.

“Y’know you don’t have to, babe. It’ll literally only take me a second. I just gotta stop sittin’ on my ass.” Peter said. He tossed the balled streamers with a failed, Michael Jordan-style execution. They landed in a nearby trashcan, “Pretty soon, I’m gonna have to put Christmas decorations up too. Might get started on 'em as soon as these ‘re down.” He smirked, “I’m thinkin’ I get everyone some seriously ugly sweaters. Even Mags, if he's still around by then. Oh, and I'll need more Snoopys. The crotch goblins love Snoopy.” Peter paused for a beat, his dark eyes drifting down your body. A subconscious instinct, “And-uhhhh…gonna need lots of tinsel…uh…”

Peter reached for his coffee mug. What was he talking about again?

“Oh? That all sounds nice!” You tilted your head to the side, flirtatiously grinning at Peter. As if you could tell how distracted he was by your body. Heat set aflame in his cheeks, as he glanced up into your eyes. Noticing the way they seemed to twinkle, “Think you’ll decorate the barn again too?” You asked, a flirtatious tease pouring through your tone.

He choked on his coffee mid-sip.

#peter maximoff x y/n #peter maximoff x you #peter maximoff x reader #txt #happy belated halloween !!! oooooo !!

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lau219 · 3 months ago

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Hey Lauren! Any headcanons for the boys’ beauty self care routines? How much high/low maintenance are they? Haircare, skincare, gym, etc? 🤔

Hey hey! Ok, answers below the cut.

Here we go…

Cillian — Very low maintenance and doesn’t really follow a self-care routine, unless you count getting plenty of sleep and going for a run. Obviously, pays little mind to his looks despite the fact that he’s gorgeous. Used to use a combo shampoo/conditioner that came in the same bottle and some random bar of soap. Only uses fancier stuff now because you know Gareth makes him. Will wear cologne, and uses a small bit of product in his hair. Hits the gym hard if a role requires it, but otherwise isn’t a fan of going to the gym. This man is somehow perfect without trying.

Emmett — Would roll his eyes at the mention of a “routine” beyond the basic shower and shave. Doesn’t work out at a gym but gets enough exercise from physical labor. As I’ve mentioned before, he’s definitely a junk food junkie yet somehow manages to stay in fantastic shape. Will put conscious effort into his appearance (haircut, cologne, a nice outfit) for special occasions, but otherwise keeps it pretty minimal. Not vain at all. Again, he’s gorgeous without even trying, but is unaware that all the ladies are thirsting over him.

Leonard — His routine each morning is the same: shower, shave, some kind of male-aimed moisturizer, and then styles his hair with a bit of product. Always wears cologne and has several different scents he rotates through. He exercises at the gym consistently to stay in shape. He’s not vain, but he knows he’s very handsome, and he definitely takes pride in his looks and wants to convey a certain presence and give off a certain vibe with his wardrobe and appearance. Enjoys when he notices the appreciative glances he gets from women.

Robert — Nearly identical routine as Leonard, except all the products he uses are ungodly expensive. It’s not that he evens cares about that, though, but that’s just what he’s presented with at the kinds of places where he shops for products. This boy doesn’t shop at CVS, haha! Despite what people might think, he’s not vain, but just like Leonard, takes pride in his appearance and wants to convey a certain image. Of course, all his clothes are also insanely expensive and high end, but he secretly relishes when he can just wear a pair of sweats and a T-shirt.

Tommy/Modern Tommy — This bitch knows he’s hot, and while his looks are all natural, he certainly takes steps to maintain his appearance. Daily routine of shower, shave, a moisturizer, and he has a few hairstyling products he uses daily, as well as cologne. Also gets routine haircuts and chooses clothes that are well-made, well-fitting, and stylish. Frequent exercise/time at the gym, and very much enjoys knowing that the ladies are very affected by his appearance.

Raymond — He takes care with his appearance, but not because he’s vain. It’s more about giving off a vibe and an air than it is self-care, and he actually doesn’t really even realize that he’s hot AF. For him, it’s about appearing collected, authoritative, and intimidating, and he has no clue how sexy he looks. Obviously, clothing choice is a big deal in the quest to appear intimidating (hello to that all-black ensemble), and his morning routine consists of showering, shaving, and, of course, styling that hair. This boy buys his hair gel by the gross.

Jonathan — Similar to Raymond, in that he maintains his appearance more for the sake of giving off a vibe of collected authority, although he is aware that he’s attractive. He makes sure he always looks well-kept and professional, and showers, shaves, styles his hair, and wears cologne daily. Not someone who visits the gym or really exercises, but he eats healthy and only occasionally indulges in junk food, so his physique is well-maintained. Is meticulous about keeping his pubes well-trimmed and looking as good as possible when naked.

Jackson — His routine consists of a daily shower, combing his hair, and some cologne, but that’s all. Will occasionally go to the gym but isn’t necessarily consistent with it. He knows he’s hot and that he doesn’t have to put in much effort, and he thinks any man that spends more than 10 minutes getting ready in the morning is a pussy.

@ennui-whimsy-and-me @breakthestereo @newbarrel

#asks for the boys #asks answered #cillian murphy #emmett a quiet place 2 #leonard miller #robert fischer #tommy shelby #raymond leon #jonathan crane #jackson rippner

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ledreca · 5 months ago

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obligatory tommy taffy hc post

once again if ur one of my disc friends for the love of god do not press read more. thanks

sort of half headcanons half character analysis idk i was just writing whatever i thought of since everyone else is

warnings: written under the assumption youve read the book, includes heavy spoilers for both the reddit story and published third parent book by elias witherow, mentions/jokes of some of the more violent acts comitted by taffy but nothing explicit or sexual. you read the book you know what youre in for. also long ass post sorry i wrote all this on my phone last night

go ahead and preface everything here with "i think" cus as these are headcanons they are just my personal thoughts and ideas of stuff making up his character. that i made up

he has "real" hair, or at the very least it's made up of individual strands and not just a chunk of blond plastic. brushable and styleable!

his soft plastic doll-like skin is actually a fairly recent development. previous iterations through time had him being made of stuff like stained wood, stuffed cloth, porcelain, whatever rez saw humans using for idols and toys and such at the time. the plastic variant is comparatively modern, obviously inspired by barbie toy lines

the skin is surprisingly malleable, functioning similarly to both the human epidermis and the plastic of a modern toy. its able to bend smoothly and fold in areas, but also any imprints of say, fingernail scratches or bite marks, will remain there until he does something about it. it irritates him to no end how impressionable it is but he tolerates it for the benefits appearance-wise

he doesn't have eyeballs per say, but he does have the sockets and general shape of them. they aren't flat. the whites of his eyes, eyelashes, and eyebrows all appear painted on tho he is still able to emote with his eyebrows. the iris is also painted on but he can move them just like a regular human can

the blue glow of his eyes is controllable by will and strengthened by heightened emotions, tho he prefers to keep a low ambient level in low light

his mouth area lacks any shape or definition, and instead also appears painted on like his other features. his teeth also lack real detail and look uncannily simple on his 3 dimensional living body (I like to think rez wanted to give him a more silly cartoonish glee vibe and instead got uncanny and sinister ones). it can still open and emote differently than his default wide toothy grin.

lets get to the guts . . . (haha) his interior is full of flesh. just flesh. like what someone who didn't know what humans or mammals or organs are would imagine is inside something only known as soft and made of meat. just full of dark and meat and goo and warp all coated in a thin layer of syrupy yellow. (I can't actually come up with a reasoning for rezs choice in making his blood yellow. maybe he thought it to be associated with happier things than humanity's red blood and that it would never really matter anyway since he'd totally never get sliced open? lol!). rez got a little lazy when it came to designing something as complicated (and objectively subparly structured) as the human organ system so he just said screw it

looking at his exterior skin tho you would never be able to tell nothing really makes sense underneath, cus his body concaves and bends and is detailed in every way that would suggest a fully developed skeletal structure and organs. he can bend any way he'd like, but he does still prefer to try and follow anatomical standards. he also appears to have a circulatory and cardiovascular system, seeing as his blood can rush to his face and other areas to "blush" yellow (yeah hc he can blush). you might even be able to hear a facsimile of a heartbeat if you had your ear pressed up against his chest :)

the only "interior" rez cared to put any effort in designing is taffys mouth and jaw structure, since it'd be visible whenever taffy would open his mouth for emoting. it looks like a generically simple mouth with no detail past the color red and 2 curved blocks on the top and bottom to represent his molars connected to his "main" teeth. it also doesn't go anywhere and is just a small pocket, so he can't actually eat anything as itd have nowhere to go

since someone else brought it up first NOT ME I'll relay my own thoughts of the subject of taffys Lower body parts. Tommy Taffy was designed by something who wanted him to successfully blend in with humanity while also being remarkable enough in a fun friendly way (whether he succeeded is another story lol) and thus designed him with everything important he believed made up a human being. rez also admits to originally believing sex and violence were the predominate human traits due to his first experiences with humanity being very early stages of life and civilization. so yeah, he probably wouldve designed him with all the knowledge and exterior parts of a normal male human being, why would he suddenly decide to cut corners on his dream's own physical lower body? (now whether or not EVERY subsequent layer had all the bits and bobs is debatable and subjective but this is purely a personal and subjective post anyway lol!) also he gave him a goddamn tongue, guys. come on

taffy could very well be a reality bending divine being IF he thought he was able to. taffy operates under strict mental parameters carried from rezs influence to not be able to pass certain self-imposed limits on his own power. its mentioned in the book he could go up to like 66 thousand copies of himself like his real name meaning (66358 deadnaming lol) but I think at his current level he could build even more layers or just copies of himself or even create something else entirely new if he just knew he was capable of it. like father like son

some words about how his layers work: in the book rez describes it as each layer being a different tweak or change to the original base layer, so this can sort of be equated as like a code base on github or something idk im not a coder. except since he never actually overwrote anything, every "bug" and "deprecated feature" never actually got fixed or removed with each update, just pushed to a metaphorical backburner. so the modern taffy would basically be running a constant rng game to decide how he would react to stimuli from his environment, which can hopefully better explain his emotions switching at the drop of a hat and his bipolarity. sorry this was like confusing af lol

^ also all his layers probably think just a liiittle differently from eachother, each one isnt just a perfect carbon copy. seeing how in the book he could theoretically go up to sixty thousand present copies, it can be assumed each summoned layer is either a compound of every layer minus the latest layer additions or, what i believe, a "division" of several layers. like, say he had three manifestations active, each one with a divided ratio of the total sixy thousand, so theyd only have around twenty thousand changes picked at random. theoretically, one of his manifestations could have a very low amount of "early" builds and lack most of the violent/sexual tendencies and instead be a relatively decent guy. what are the chances of something like that happening though haha

he has a perfect hivemind relationship with his other current manifested layers, and he's able to perfectly tune in to every manifestation with precise focus. he doesn't really think about this tho as it's another one of those self-imposed limits to not acknowledge just how powerful his mind really is. this could also be why he's so irritated when someone points out or acknowledges another one of his layers

I don't actually think he works like this but itd be funny to imagine his thoughts are just all his 60000 layers yelling at each other like in slay the princess. mental fortitude of a god to be able to function with that shit

he's capable of instantly remanifesfing himself. he sometimes doesn't for reasons I'll talk about later (threat) but he IS able to "shed" and dismiss his current form for a new one if his gets, say, dirty bitten scratched stabbed lost russian roulette and/or set on fire. he just appears back either in front of a house if he plans on making an entrance or back inside if he knows no one will see him, depending on the severity and reason for why he had to remanifest. just like imagine if some kid accidentally got apple juice all over his stupid khakis and he was like "🤗 no biggie!" while internally fuming and he just disappears into some shadowy corner and comes back in the middle of the night sitting on the couch all clean and ominous

he can be a master at virtually any skill or talent if he knows enough about it. like what's that? youre interested in woodworking? wow, taffys actually a master woodworker and a whiz with a whittler! you've been getting into opera singing lately? lucky, taffy has an incredible range and can be your theater partner! he'll help you :) (whether you want him to or not)

he does actually have a really nice voice and is naturally good at singing tho. someone else mentioned this but he rlly would be putting a kid to bed and have to come up with some shit on the spot to sing them to sleep. he probably would have an insane range too cus lack of real vocal cords and all his sounds coming from an unknown eldritch source of power in the sky

he can purr. that is all

i KNOW his chest be rumbling from his goofy laughing and it's so nice to lay on. mask off

he used to really look up to rez and admire him as a creator, at least until he began to actually "exist" as more and more layers were added and he could feel the dissatisfaction and maybe even hatred from rez for things that were actually rezs fault but taffy would later assume were his own shortcomings. this got even worse once rez discovered he was out and about on earth and tried stopping him, driving a wedge between them that would eventually escalate into full on hate and spite fueled rivalry (mostly on taffys part). he does still have some deepseated respect and reliance on rez tho

highkey fantasizes about someone breaking into one of the houses in his care. it would likely rarely if ever happen cus of the effects he has on a neighborhoods aura and it probably really drives outsiders away but maybe during an early taffy "infestation" someone could attempt to rob his current family. he has a power fantasy where he'd violently protect his home by making an example out of whatever misfortunate schmuck decided to break into the wrong house and rip into him, proving he's strong and capable of protecting his territory. no lasting physical trauma on his own beneficiaries needed! (no but like imagine you just broke the lock on some upper middle class house. you walk in past the foyer and into the living room and sitting on the couch in the dark room is some tall lanky figure staring at you with piercing blue lights and a wide white grin. he lets out a quiet chuckle. ur not dying quickly nor painlessly)

he is unfathomably dramatic. I'm talking insane drama queen levels and passion for theatrics. will always be dedicated to the bit. his body just got thrown off a cliff by his current family and they think he's gone for good? give them a couple weeks. let them think they won. all for the spectacular and horrific entrance busting down the door he'll make on his return. need to make an example out of some poor parent who's just disrespected him for the last time? he won't just punch them, no, hes about to splay their corpse on the shingles and make the kids help. he does NOT have to do allat but he does. for the bit

he's actually incredibly intolerant towards child abuse from parents and will very quickly nip it in the bud at the source i.e separate heads from necks if what he's seen is bad enough. he only ever really snaps on a family himself if they go against him, and punishment without reason would be enough for him to fully takeover for the abusive parents in question

I like to imagine there has to have been a least one set of kids who deemed him more tolerable than their real parents because they were just that bad (I plan on working on a little something with this premise in the future, highkey suck at writing tho so don't expect much)

he'd be surprisingly good at comforting someone if you just let him. he knows all the methods to handle panic attacks and best ways to hold someone to calm you down from night terrors and such

he thoroughly appreciates the senses and thinks humans take them for granted. he believes all senses are wondrous (the quiet sneeze of a baby, the warmth of a family pet choosing his lap to lay on in the middle of the night cus he hasn't moved and won't move for hours, the indulgent aroma of a tired husband's baking brownies wafting through the house, and ofc the sight of a child's small smile at some funny thought or another when they thought he wasn't looking. he'd enjoy tasting things too if he didn't think he was wasting it since he'd have to throw it away later) he's a sucker for it all

this dumbass probably really only does have one item in his wardrobe. poor sod and his stupid Hi! shirt hes emotionally dependant on. still dont have to draw him in tho. if he does branch out he would make sure to keep the Hi! in there somewhere, be it one of those name stickers or a on button pinned to his lapel

anyway not a hc but a potential fixit fic idea for the book ending if anyone wants it: "killing" rez didnt actually work. something went wrong, maybe a subconscious reeling that forced him to collapse and go dark, but he never actually died. (you cant kill a god that easy.) thus, taffy remains, albeit incredibly beaten and roughed up. something changed him that night, though. whether it was witnessing what he thought was the death of his precious creator, the showdown with one of his favorite wards, his own horrific "death", or something else entirely removed, he woke up in that housefire different. more appreciative of life and with a new understanding of his own morality (or lack thereof). he would leave and go to rez's own already-mending mass and theyd abscond.. somewhere. anywhere other than here with the memories literally burning behind them and dripping blue fluid. then theyd experience found family and love for the first time and finally bond as father and son and live happily ever after the end WIN

sorry and thanks for reading this if you got this far. stay winning taffy fans and led fans

#the third parent #tommy taffy #this shit is NOT going in any other tag im not subjecting the regular people to this. god bless #sorry this is like long as hell btw #i love the taffster hes so intricate #no beta we die like rez

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