#this is not even one of my top worldbuilding things to get annoyed about

[wrishwrosh]

i like when fantasy characters say “okay” because it implies the existence of some kind of elven martin van buren

[arson-09]

feeling rlly annoyed at sjm right now for her shitty worldbuilding

im trying to work on stuff for my acotar fic but theres so many problems im running into when it comes to canon

1- WHY IS THERE NO DATING SYSTEM?? WHAT YEAR IS IT? WHAT MONTH IS IT? this is one of the most basic aspects of creating a story. For example one of the first things i did with my friends when we created out story was make a dating system and explained its origin and shit.

2- why do the majority of characters lack surnames?? i get side characters but major ones like RHYSAND, Tamlin, Cassian, Azriel, and many more lack simple things such as surnames.

3- many characters just arent named. The archeron sisters father is not named. All of rhysand and tamlins family (who are talked about a decent amount) are nameless. Cassians mother is also nameless. The king of hybern is a MAJOR villain who goes unnamed.

4- also missing ages for lots of characters. annoying as fuck.

5- a very non descriptive time period to reference. There’s electricity? theres baths? but its also strangely archaic. Characters dress a bit old fashion but also like its 2016? theres no reference for time period at all.

6- A lack of explanation for the economy. Specifically VELARIS. I have no idea how velaris as a city works. From what i can tell theres no way it can be as good as it is due to what we are told about the city. It was hidden for years but it was able to survive? what about trade? government? homelessness and poverty are said to be non existence but how?? Rhysand is said to be extremely wealthy but how?? Tamlin was villainized for having his people pay taxes (which werent even severe ones??) but rhysand somehow has a city running ‘perfectly’ while also building his like 3rd or 4th house.

these are just off the top of my head too. Sjm when i catch you

[banavalope]

Hello, I'm a Homestuck and Good Omens fan and just saw your post about coffee. I came to the Homestuck fandom way late, though, and don't know what the coffee theory was. I was wondering if you'd be willing to share that story from the trenches if it's not too traumatic :)

I'll preface by saying, this all happened near about the time I began to step away from Homestuck, as this was late 2011 to early 2012. My recollection could very well be missing some juicier deets, because I always managed to avoid the worst of it. In all I had a pretty benign time floating about the Homestuck fandom, I'll say that. My knowledge is as a fly's.

If you want the short version: once upon a time, the Homestuck fandom was so stupid it had discourse over the way coffee was drawn in a single panel, because the stylistic choice used to show the way cheap potted coffee has that oil slick sheen on the top Really got the gamerz thinking Gamzee was putting troll blood in the coffee.

The long version is this: this Act was annoying. All the Acts had been annoying, there'd been rather more than six of them so far. The fandom's toxicity was at its most potent, and the main fandom exodus hadn't happened yet. But the stylistic choice brewing on page 4702 of A6I2 suggested a discourse was on the horizon, and it was the size of planet fucking Jupiter.

To understand the affairs of 2011/12 Homestucks, a few things are important to mention: first, nobody enjoyed Act 6. Ask anyone from the tumblr era First Wave, we all agreed that Cascade would have been a better place to start wrapping up the comic as a whole. When Act 6 opened introducing the alpha kids, a whole new plot derivative, and we all realized we'd have to go through the same slog again, that the story wasn't over, the collective exhaustion was palpable. SWATHS left unhappy; worse yet (for some), the alpha kids brought us away from the game of SBURB and the over-aching plot, to instead place our focus on their interpersonal relationships. It was a bad time to take your audience away from a well crafted climax.

Reading it now as a completed work makes this not so bad, because the book is wrote. You can consume it as a finished piece and clearly interpret a through line for yourself, start to finish. Skip it even, if you want. When you've no idea at what time the next update will come, while all the pieces remain necessary to tell the story, any pacing is bad pacing.

Second, while Homestucks are known for many things - all of them cringe - the one that goes overlooked most, in spite of the ripple effect we still feel from it today in every corner, is the sheer amount of over analyzing done to the story itself. Every panel, every inch of every pixel, was a part of a puzzle we all collectively made up. Theorizing was an integral part to the Update Culture era of Homestuck's fandom, that we Figure Out the Story, you had to be the one who predicted what came next. Impressive how none of us came up with some kind of fandom Nobel Peace Prize, for how much we lauded it as a lifetime achievement.

I'll give you, Homestuck does have a very rich narrative. Much of it, I'll favor, is even intentional. It made worldbuilding choices captivating enough to get people painting themselves grey, for fun, so surely it had a few right ideas in some places. And there's nothing wrong about analyzing your media, picking apart its references to tie together a background story, even if it's just one you make up based on how you experienced reading it. That's kind of the whole point of consuming art. It's to be discussed, share your personal conclusions on. Theory is the breath of creativity.

It's the whole part about wanting to be right, where Homestucks as a collective force wanted to start eating each other alive on the spot. We were fucking OBNOXIOUS with theory posting. I'll be honest with you, I really ate that kind of thing up, and even I was getting annoyed. People were beginning to stretch, likely to cope with becoming bored.

Finally, the sober Gamzee controversy. This came about a while before coffeegate, but the effect the inciting update had on Homestucks is comparable to a haunting. It was fucking chernobyl, and a bad day to be a nuclear scientist because now it was your problem. Vriska fans - equally insufferable, as we all were by some respect[1] - and Gamzee fans fought with each other VEHEMENTLY, just to see whos gang was better. Keep that in the background of your mind as the theme music to what's playing. Everyone was anxiously wondering what had happened to Gamzee, because for the last several some-odd panels, we'd lost the boy. He was full of murderous intent, we were down to precious few characters on the meteor left, and we'd lost the boy.

So here we are. It's 2011. We're standing now at the end of the world, we've lost the boy for several panels, and finally the plot is trying to move along. We're all tired, and irritated, and divorced, doing this song and dance one more time but god willing the LAST TIME, when a joke about the look of shitty potted coffee gets made.

And some harbinger of the fucking apocalypse takes to tumblr dot com, drafting up a post about how Gamzee - living in the meteor walls - is putting troll blood into the coffee. Because, otherwise, how is Kanaya as a rainbow drinker doing so fine? Dave called the taste metallic, like blood. Something something long forgotten theories about trolls blood here something something. People would chime in to say "that's just how coffee looks", somehow it dissolved into actual discourse of people violently discussing back and forth how it could ONLY BE BLOOD, because coffee drawn in a prior panel UPDATES AGO didn't have the film on top, only now AFTER SOBER GAMZEE. Etcetera. It was just the worst case of reading too hard into something that you done ever did see.

Shortly following this, many people who were already growing exhausted with Homestuck's narrative direction at this point decided to take this coffee theory as their sign the flood was coming and to board the ark or learn how to swim. Anyone who learned to swim subsequently left during the exodus of 2015.

Again, my memory is pretty hazy. Thanks to Requiem Cafe, surprisingly difficult to google these days. Certainly another old still following me will have something more to add that I'm forgetting, as your handy dandy unreliable narrator.

[1] Said the Eridan fan.

[honourablejester]

Just on the topic of things that mildly bug me from D&D 5e, I just wanna talk about white dragons for a bit?

I really love white dragons. They’re in my top three dragon subspecies, along with greens and golds. I especially adore the thing about their memory:

“Though only moderately intelligent, white dragons have extraordinary memories. They recall every slight and defeat, and have been known to conduct malicious vendettas against creatures that have offended them.” […] “A white dragon's flawless memory means that it knows how it came to possess every coin, gem, and magic item in its hoard, and it associates each item with a specific victory.” (Monster Manual)

As you can tell from things like Miirikjilinth, a homebrew white dragon NPC of mine, I love the potential worldbuilding implications of their memories. The arctic dragons, holding the oral history and memories of whole regions safe inside their minds. Now, granted, most whites are far too antisocial for that, but it’s still such a fantastic potential about them.

But. Right there in that quote is the thing that bugs me: though only moderately intelligent.

Why are white dragons written (and statted) as the dumb ones? They’re the ‘smallest, least intelligent, and most animalistic of the chromatic dragons’. Even Fizban’s Treasury of Dragons, despite lightening up on things like morality and alignment for chromatics, continues to hammer this point: “I enjoy an animated debate... just not with a white dragon. Impossible and ignorant, all of them. The air must be different in their arctic latitudes.” (Fizban himself). And the stats bear this out. White dragons have the lowest mental stats of any dragon, the only adult dragons that have an Intelligence of less than 10. They’re literally the only dragons to have a minus modifier to a mental stat. And it kind of kneejerk annoys me?

Now. Some of this could be me attaching too much value to numbers for intelligence. And there is an argument that whites are intended to be essentially the barbarians of the dragon world. Their emphasis is on hunting, combat, living off the land, being remote and antisocial and far from civilisation. Which, I do get that. But.

Barbarians are a player class, and a choice a player makes on what stats they can afford to dump. White dragons are a race of beings. Well. A subspecies of an intelligent species of beings. And with that in mind, having the entire subspecies be glossed as ‘bestial’, ‘animalistic’, and ‘the least intelligent’ of all their kind feels … weird.

The dragons that choose to live away from civilisation, that choose to live off the land, that prefer treasures taken from their natural environment (“However, in their remote arctic climes, the treasure hoards of white dragons more often contain walrus and mammoth tusk ivory, whale-bone sculptures, figureheads from ships, furs, and magic items seized from overly bold adventurers.” MM), that don’t like to have to talk to people that often, those dragons are dumb and animalistic. Despite the fact that their memories are basically the equivalent of the Keen Mind feat (which increases INT) but with recall for centuries rather than months.

Intelligence in D&D measures ‘mental acuity, accuracy of recall, and the ability to reason’. Four of the five INT skills are about memory rather than the ability to think on your feet (which, granted, might be a whole other argument). The basic ability descriptions repeatedly emphasis memory (‘a character with low Intelligence might speak simply or easily forget details’ PHB). Like, this might just be me, but I feel like a ‘flawless memory’ should give them a higher INT score than 8? Is it meant to be supernatural memory and fully divorced from their actual brain? Explain please.

I don’t know why it bugs me that much. It could just be because they’re one of my favourite dragons, and I’m annoyed that they’re widely described as being dumb as bricks just because they’re not one of the civilised sorts of dragons. Their WIS and CHA scores are also the lowest of any adult dragon, at 12 each, and while CHA makes sense considering they’re the most antisocial dragons, given their emphasis on hunting and perception and ambush, you’d think they’d at least get a better WIS score too. IDK, I just feel like you could give the adult white statblock, the ‘representative sample’ of their kind, at least the same mental stat spread as blacks and brasses (INT 14, WIS 13, CHA 17)? Maybe reverse the WIS and CHA scores, because, again, antisocial, plus hunters with good perception.

Anyway. Apologies, very random grumble that may, possibly, be some of my own biases (and favouritism) cropping up. But. The description does make me feel weird, and kneejerk protective of my vicious, feral, incredibly long-memoried white dragon beloveds.

[skitskatdacat63]

Tysm for the tags @monacobasedgirldad @schumigrace @fernandoalonzoo sry im a bit late getting to this lol

Are you named after anyone?

My great great grandmother(I think??), though she was named Katarzyna, and I was born Catherine, but go by Catie obviously(this lowkey annoys my mom lmao, especially bcs if I were to have a nickname, it was supposed to be Cate.)

When was the last time you cried?

Today, over classical music. I think I cry at least once a day 😭 I am very emotional

Do you have kids?

Nope :)

What sports did you play/have you played?

I played soccer when I was a kid. Also does marching band count?

Do you use sarcasm?

All the fucking time, literally constantly. And also we sarcastically bully each other in my family, so I have to pull myself back from accidentally insulting people 😭

What is the first thing you notice about people?

Hmmmm, I feel like ive done this tag game before bcs I remember writing this exact answer. But usually I notice if someone is a good conversationalist or not. Like do they like to lead the convo, do they like to listen to the other people, do they talk too much, too little, are they awkward about it? It's just very interesting to me, bcs I think that kinda thing really does instantly show you if you're going to be compatible with a person(as a friend or more etc.) Cause I talk a lot a lot, and I think it's difficult to get along w people who are untalkative but also people who talk an equal amnt if not more djkfkglg.

What is your eye color?

Just brown!

Scary movies or happy endings?

Scary movies definitely. I mean im not opposed to a happy ending obviously, but that's not really what im always looking for in a movie, I guess? Rn I'm trying to think of my top movies, and man, not a lot of them have happy endings 😭 But I literally just watched two horror movies the past wknd so! Even though they make me paranoid

Any talents?

I think I could go on a rant about anything if you gave me a bit of time. I really think I can just talk endlessly. Is that a skill? Or is it just annoying..? But yeah I'm not sure, but I think I'm pretty good at absorbing information and being able to go on and on about it.

Where were you born?

America rahhh 🦅🦅 I like my state a lot even though I feel like all my peers keep saying "ugh I don't want to be in [insert state] anymore" Smh how dare you

What are your hobbies?

Mostly drawing! I draw both F1 fanart(pretty much all selfmade AUs tho) and ocs. I like writing lore and worldbuilding and meta, but not really writing itself. I like reading fic and watching movies as well. And I think one of the main things I do these days tbh is read about history and keep up with politics. I get more and more involved with it as the days go by, but unlike drawing, I don't really have an outlet for it sigh sigh. So that's why a lot of AUs involve history and random other things, bcs its fun to involve my interests with each other!

Do you have any pets?

Yes I do! Two cats and two dogs. The cats are named Jin and Frank. Jin is basically me in cat form, he's so anxious 😭 and Frank is like my brother, he's such a little bastard who loves to hiss all the time. My dogs are named Maisie and Ruby. Maisie is a menace to society, but she is also the most beautiful dog ever, so I forgive her. Her name makes me laugh bcs she's named after this book character, Maisie Dobbs right? So her name tag says Maisie Doggs

How tall are you?

Around 5'4

Favorite subject at school?

Politics >:) But I'm pretty interested in philosophy as well rn. Unfortunately my love for foreign languages has been slipping in the semester or so, bcs my professors on that side kinda suck. So I've been putting more energy into my other major, and now all I can talk about is history, politics and philosophy, etc etc. It's just a lot of fun and very interesting to me!

Dream job?

Man, sometimes I wish I could just be a student forever, I just want to keep learning all about the world and other things. But I'd like a job that's not too static, something that pushes me out into the world a bit, maybe smth in the government or like a non-profit idk yet!

Ahhhh I'm doing this a bit late so I'm not sure who's done it yet, I feel like mostly everyone has :,) I tag anyone who's interested, like seriously I'd love to see people's answers who I haven't yet!!

[vivithefolle]

The thing about Rowling is that she bases a lot of characters on people she knows or knew irl. So you have these perfectly decent characters and she just doesn't have a clue how they work internally.

Exactly! I've answered a Quora question on that, previously.

Below, the text of said answer:

Did J.K. Rowling base any of her characters on herself or people she knows personally?

Pretty much all of them?

She said there was “a bit of her in every of her characters". Which tends to happen naturally when you write.

(For example, being autistic, I tend to write characters as very introspective and remembering small details about a lot of stuff and being able to perform literary analysis in the middle of conversation. I've been informed that this is not how the “average" human works. So when I write a character, I often end up making them autistic because that's literally how my brain works. It's unfathomable to me that you wouldn't be paralyzed with fear by the idea of making a decision. Taking an opportunity on the fly, throwing your whole world off-balance with just one gratuitous action? What folly is this??)

According to Rowling, “I married Harry Potter. I married a very brave and gutsy person. And that's who Harry is”. Okay, so before Sauron and Acidic Virtuesignaller come crawling out the woodwork, I would like for us all to consider the implications: so Harry is “a very brave and gutsy person", and that's all. That's the only qualifier for Harry. To be Harry you need to be brave and gutsy. It's not like there's a construct in this series that's literally called The House Of The Brave. With a magic sword that only comes to those that are brave and gutsy enough to wield it. Which three people in the books have used that sword? Harry, Ron, and Neville. If only Harry was “very brave and gutsy" then what are we calling Ron and Neville? Hermione? Ginny? Luna? Snape? Dumbledore? Ok so there we go, if the requirement to be Harry is “be very brave and gutsy" then I can point to half a dozen characters that have the same characteristic ON TOP OF having an actual personality.

Ron was based on Rowling's childhood friend who owned a blue Ford Anglia. Based on Rowling's later comments about having “dated Ron" in her youth, we can infer that Rowling wrote into Ron some of the bad behaviours of guys she'd dated, probably with the idea of having him outgrow them (but considering how much she seems to enjoy writing Ron getting punished for these behaviours…). Some of the things she'd felt about poverty are spoken from Ron's mouth in GOF, and the Locket's tirade is a dead ringer (albeit with the genders reversed) for what she reported her father told her about how he'd rather have had a son.

Hermione is according to JKR a caricature of how she was when she was younger. “I wasn't that clever, but I was that annoying on occasion". I doubt JKR got invited to a ball by a super famous athlete though.

Snape was allegedly based on her chemistry teacher, John Nettleship, who was autistic and I can believe would have made jokes that wouldn't necessarily land as such (solidarity 😔✊). However I believe Snape was very much a caricature and an exaggeration instead of a “100% authentic" portrait of John Nettleship, even if he later came to call the character “me". Rowling needed her Mean Teacher archetype after all.

Cuthbert Binns, the ghost teacher of History that is excruciatingly droll and boring, seems to be a summation of Rowling's thoughts about his subject. Also a convenient way of forgoing worldbuilding.

Mothers are a very important part of Rowling's world. Lily's sacrifice defines the entire series, Molly Weasley is a strong presence through the books and sends Bellatrix's fanatic arse to Hell, Merope Gaunt's refusal to live shapes Voldemort into who he is, Narcissa Malfoy lies to Voldemort in exchange for her son's safety, even Barty Crouch Jr's mother made the ultimate sacrifice by switching places with her son in Azkaban. The only mother figure that isn't positive is Walburga Black, and even she gets to have a humanizing moment when Hermione theorizes that she was kind to Kreacher in DH. All this takes on a whole new meaning when you learn that JKR wrote the first Harry Potter in the wake of her mother's death.

By contrast, father figures are much less revered, and again it is directly a result of JKR herself: she had a notoriously bad relationship with her father, Peter James Rowling. One can postulate that Peter Pettigrew's name wasn't all a matter of alliteration, and that James Potter's redemption was the sort of thing Rowling might have wished of her own father.

Pansy Parkinson was a conglomerate of all the girls who bullied Rowling at school.

Umbridge was based on a work colleague - though she's apparently another conglomerate character - who hid nastiness behind a syrupy sweet exterior. Umbridge is often said to be the worst villain in Harry Potter - because while few people ever experience a genocidal terrorist stalking them, many have met someone like Umbridge who abuse their power just because they enjoy feeling in control of others.

The Death Eaters in general were based on the IRA, but took more cues from Nazi Germany in Deathly Hallows.

[imtrashraccoon]

Thanks for the tag @snowcoffeee ! I'm all too happy to talk about my favourite hobby!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

At the moment, I have six.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

281,816. Yikes, I didn't even know this was a statistic until now.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Just Undertale right now.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Have Some Empathy, Dear - the series I did for Bad Sansuary.

The Hand We've Been Dealt - the first fic I posted on AO3.

Swarmed By Sirens - the most recent fic I'm working on.

The Nightmare of Apathy - my pet project.

Raccoon's Undertale Related Oneshots - this one shouldn't really count as it's just a collection of my works.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Every single one! I really enjoy engaging with the people who like my work and it gives me ideas.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oof, I don't like angsty endings so I can't say that I have any. In the past, I wrote a oneshot with one of my OC's in Horrortale though. That was...angsty. It's also really bad compared to what I write now lol. I don't think I'll ever post it.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

At the moment, Have Some Empathy, Dear is the only complete fic. So that one.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No, at least I haven't yet. I did get one comment ages ago where someone was annoyed that Korinna (MC from The Hand We've Been Dealt) just went to live with the Fell brothers after they killed her when she was a human. She didn't know that it was them though, so the comment didn't make sense? Admittedly, the plot for that fic is a bit weak...

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Nah, I've been tempted to, but I'm not comfortable making that sort of thing. I allow minors to follow me anyways, so if I did, that would have to change.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

AU's don't count as a crossover I suppose. So, no, I don't write crossovers.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but I'd be honoured if anyone wanted to!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Again, no. I have chatted with friends about fic plots but never for the purpose of creating something together. That could be fun!

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

I'm more of a self-shipper and pretty much always have been OC x Canon as well. I do like Soriel. The way some people write their dynamic is adorable and even if they aren't in a relationship, I love seeing their friendship. I don't really ship anything else though.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Pretty much everything with my old Undertale OC's and my old Star Wars OC. My reasons are that I've changed my interests and created better characters now. I'm not entirely opposed to ever posting these online but the state that they're in at the moment makes me cringe.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Definitely describing environments and worldbuilding. I have a strong imagination and so whenever I write a scene I try to put myself in the character's position and describe what they see. Worldbuilding is also enjoyable since it gets my brain working.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Dialogue. I struggle to make characters sound natural at times and my earlier writing suffers lot from stiff dialogue.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I love this! I don't really know any other languages myself so my own attempts are limited, however I love seeing it in other people's works. I do like to include ASL where I can since it's a language I have some familiarity with.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Star Wars actually. I had a Jedi turned Sith character in a years long message board roleplay and multiple times I attempted to write down a backstory for her but I never finished. After being convinced to join the Sith, she was an Inquisitor for a bit before being promoted to Sith Lady and training a few apprentices. She briefly became Sith Empress but stepped down when the war with a faction of Mandalorians turned ugly. She hasn't been seen or heard from since... Yeah, no, I just lost interest in the character and SW in general with Disney's takeover.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

I love pretty much all of them! I think my favourite is Have Some Empathy, Dear but I do wish I had more time to flesh parts of it out at the time. Otherwise, it's The Nightmare of Apathy.

[planeoftheeclectic]

Oh boy, this is about to be a blast from the past. Thanks @skarabrae-stone for the tag!

Rules: Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass this onto other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💖

So I only recently started writing again, meaning I've only got 2 works that are from the last decade, but honestly I'm still very fond of those older ones; they do an excellent job at being what they are.

Doing the no pressure tags above the cut because I don't know if that messes them up: @stonemaskedtaliesin, @zyrafowe-sny, and @firecoloredwater, plus anyone else who sees this and has written something! Hyping yourself up is good practice!

Columbo: Turnabout's Fair Play | 19k (Incomplete) | T | Columbo x Ace Attorney set between AA3 and AA4

Summary:

Technically speaking, Mr. Wright, this isn't my usual beat. But Detective Gumshoe - you know Dick, right? - I owed him a favor, see? And it had been a slow week, so I figured I'd look around, see if I could give the guy a hand. Real stand-up guy, he is, we could use more like him. And anyway, I know you're a real busy guy Mr. Wright, so I'll make this real quick, get out of your hair. I know you and he were real good friends, so I'm sure this is a difficult time for you. Oh, uh, just one more thing Mr. Wright. Why were the two of you such good friends again?

As I say in the dedication, this is the idea that helped me break a very, very long dry spell, so it has to take the top spot for that if nothing else. @stonemaskedtaliesin had introduced me to Ace Attorney, I had introduced them to Columbo, and at some point they went looking to see if there were any crossovers and were disappointed to find none. They come tell me this in discord and I, like a fool, say:

"Well, actually, it makes sense there aren't any. I mean, they're kind of contradictory worldviews. The whole point of Columbo is that he always gets the right guy, and the whole point of Ace Attorney is that the police never get the right guy."

Fortunately for all of us, I continued:

"I mean, for it to even work you'd need some kind of convoluted setup - maybe that would stop the AA police from just arresting someone immediately. And who would be the killer anyway? Well, ok, there's an option there, but who should they murder? Maya? That'd be mean, but that's the obvious choice. Hmm...nobody likes him, I could murder him, but how--oh."

And at that point I stopped talking because the end of this story materialized in my brain and I wanted to make sure it was a surprise. Spoiler culture may be overblown, but murder mysteries are an exception, I feel.

Anyways, if you're a fan of either series, enjoy gen fic, like seeing characters get what they deserve, or just want to see Columbo at an anime convention, this is the fic for you! From a writing standpoint, it's been really fun to experiment with a very limited POV, to try to mimic the feel of a television camera. And of course, Columbo's dialogue is a joy to write. (As you'll see later, dialogue is one of my strengths)

Song of the Peregrine [Podfic] | OG fic is 39k (Incomplete) | T | Chrom/F!Robin but honestly it's mostly gen | Kid Icarus Uprising x Fire Emblem Awakening

Summary:

There were reports of something in the skies of eastern Ylisse. Something with wings as black as pitch and eyes as red as rubies. Dark Pit has no clue where he's managed to land himself, but it turns out that Pit and Palutena don't have a monopoly on annoying. He can leave these humans anytime he wants, and he will. Soon. Any day now. If the Shepherds have it their way, that day won't come any time soon. (In which Dark Pit ends up joining the Shepherds, and the world tilts.)

The original fic is @stonemaskedtaliesin's, but I like to consider myself its honorary godparent. We've spent a lot of time worldbuilding for it, and it's so good you guys. It's going to be amazing. There are long term plans.

I started the podfic because I wanted to listen to it as I fell asleep. The audio quality is definitely shakier in the first couple chapters as I figure things out, but it's been really fun learning new skills and doing lots of fun silly voices.

...still need to finish editing chapter 5.

Anyway, blanket recommendation to go read this if you know anything about Kid Icarus (Fire Emblem is a bonus but not necessary, iit's pretty well-explained in-story) and if you like podfic, hey! You're in luck! Fun fact: this is the only Awakening podfic as of right now. Yes I'm also surprised. Maybe if I ever finish this one I'll set out to try and change that. goat milk and oats Grima would be so much fun to voice.

Warrior Cats Smoofs | 8.5k | G | Gen | Warrior Cats

Okay I'm kind of cheating here but that's going to be a theme for these last few answers. I wrote these over a decade ago with my best friend at the time. She had internet, I didn't, so we had a joint account on the Warrior Cats Wiki and the Warriors Fanfiction Wiki, which are both Fandom now I believe. I archived them to AO3 because of that, and because even years later they would occasionally get a new comment from someone who really enjoyed reading them. And, as I said, I'm still very fond of them. My handle on most of the internet still comes from these stories and that account. They are simple, silly, dialogue and stage directions only parodies, and they were a blast to write. I still remember the melody we came up with for the ending jingle. I'm pretty sure these guys (plus the playwriting class I took) are a big part of why I tend to be very dialogue-heavy. I like fun purple-prosy descriptions, but sometimes a few spoken words can convey a whole lot of actions. Show Don't Tell taken to the extreme, I guess.

I'm pretty sure The Library was our most popular one back in the day (to the point we made a sequel)! The Auction was the first (though doesn't hold up quite as well...lol they're all 15 years old anyway). I'm very fond of Christmas Caroling because all the lyrics are singable and that is my PET PEEVE IF YOU'RE GOING TO DO IT THE METER HAD BETTER BE RIGHT OR AT LEAST CLOSER THAN A CATHOLIC HYMN. Most of all though, I'm fond of all the memories these have. I don't know where Moss is now, but I hope they're doing well. It is also fun to see where I've come from over the years - like I said, upon reflection it makes sense that I tend to default to pretty dialogue-heavy.

The Palutena Trap | 4.7k (Incomplete) | T | Gen (past Palutena/Medusa | Kid Icarus Uprising

Summary:

Kid Icarus meets the Parent Trap.

That's it, that's all I've got.

Ok now this one is cheating because it's not published anywhere yet except in snippets on tumblr. This was actually conceived at almost the same time as Turnabout's Fair Play, but I'm trying to only focus at one at a time, so this one won't properly see the light of day until TFP is finished. (We're getting there! We're almost at the end of Act 2 out of 3!!) That does mean that I'm going about writing it in a very different way - there's going to be lots and lots of editing once I finally set down to publish this. Which is probably for the best - I'm sure there are bits of tfp that would be better if I wrote the whole thing and then went back to edit.

My favorite part of this story is still the normal-people jobs I've given everyone, since this is technically a modern AU. We have an investigative journalist who lives on a yacht, mob boss, butler who's retired MI6, and front woman for a punk band which is actually a front for an eco-terrorist group, for example. I talk more about this story here and here. Aside from that, my favorite thing is exploring the relationship between Dark Pit and Lady Palutena, and between Lady Palutena and Medusa.

The former gets off on the worst possible foot in canon, and it's only ever obliquely addressed, so it's a lot of fun to play with and extrapolate from. In this version, Dark Pit is a child whose mother gave up everything to do with him (and said some pretty nasty things in the court record). So that's where we stand: how do you reckon with that? What does it mean that you still want some kind of relationship, or at least answers? What is family and blood, in the end?

The latter relationship is one that's...well, I wouldn't say it's canon, but it's definitely canon-compliant. It's rather like Narumitsu, in that I look at it and go "hm. whatever is going on between those two, they're not normal about each other." This is true in canon, and if anything it's less true in The Palutena Trap, since despite the name the story is not about getting the parents back together so much as reconciling a mother and son. But the more this idea ferments in my brain the more I want to have some kind of meeting at the end. Maybe it goes badly, maybe it goes less badly, but I have this mental image in my head: Imagine the messiest divorce you've ever seen. Ugly, dragged through the papers, all kinds of legal issues, you part ways never to speak again. You hate her guts, and you can't go a month without thinking about her because she's always got Yet Another Stupid News Article coming out. You find out your kids have been playing some switcheroo on you, and when you meet her again you're coldly civil, both of you clearly holding yourselves back from starting a slugfest in the local forum, and then you see: she's still wearing your wedding ring. The one you picked out, the one you put on her finger 14 years ago. I just. IDK they're not normal about each other and the complexity and ambiguity of it compels me.

Vaguely Remembered 2nd Grade Writing Assignment | like 2 pages maybe | G | Gen | The Land Before Time

Alright this one's definitely cheating but this has already been a lot of reminiscing about the past, so here's a toast to the very first thing I ever wrote: an adventure story starring the main cast of The Land Before Time. All I remember about it is it absolutely sucked to get started but once I did it was longer than it needed to be and I used the word Petrie-ball™. Yes, including the ™. The Petrie-ball™ was how they solved the big obstacle, I think. Like I said, I don't remember much of it, but I remember how proud and happy I felt when it was done. So here's to you, long-forgotten fanfiction adventure story. Here's to the first of many, with many more to follow after.

(Also, if you want to see more of TFP, Palutena Trap, or Peregrine Podfic, you can bother me in a few hours for WIP Wednesday! If you want more OG Peregrine you have to bother @stonemaskedtaliesin instead. Actually, make sure you do that, I know they've got chapter 8 waiting in the wings and I NEED to see how that scene with Pip and Lissa plays out)

[sparkylurkdragon]

I may have to replay Tears, and in fact will during my Research here, but I will grant that I don't remember it having the same amount of Absolutely Fucking Dogshit Shrines the way Breath does.

There aren't a lot! But holy fuck are they annoying, particularly with weapon degradation. The golf one (by the way your hammer is degrading the whole time and the physics are wonky), the 'shoot arrows at this water thing to solve a puzzle' one (by the way your bow is degrading the whole time), and the hey look our controller has a gyroscope ones... why, dev team, whyyyyyy...

Glad they didn't make a comeback that I remember in Tears. The 'carry a crystal' ones can come pretty close, but I don't remember them being quite this infuriating, particularly not in the later game. The Breath ones would still be dogshit even if you solved them with an endgame build.

Man. If I could've had Tears' overall better gameplay (not revolutionarily better but with enough quality-of-life tweaks that I miss it replaying Breath) with Breath's more coherent worldbuilding (the more I think about Tears' story the more annoyed I get, but it's no Metroid: Other M), I'd have been set. As it stands the two of them are still pretty firmly in second place after my three favourite Zeldas (OoT, TP, and LA/LAHD) - phenomenal games but with enough weak points that they can't quite dethrone any of the top three.

[script-a-world]

Submitted via Google Form:

I was wondering about how can I have primitive (like stone age? or maybe further a long if required) cultures in my story build large or tall structures. My idea is that a structure like what you see of Stonehenge would actually be remnants of 200m tall towers or something. Would love to go as high as possible, so any ideas on that? Also I suppose what sort of rock type would be needed? It's an entirely fictional place so earth stuff can be changed, but perhaps not drastically - I mean it's still an earth like planet.

Addy: The first question I have is the societal pressure that is pushing them to build up instead of out. Generally speaking, walkable cities without elevators top out at around 5 stories, since going up a lot of stairs takes time and is pretty annoying, especially if you're having to do so consistently throughout the day. Let's call it 15 meters, or around 50 ft. If that's carved into rock (ala Mesa Verde or Derinkuyu), you can get that kind of height out of stone, but anything with multiple stories is generally going to require either A) some kind of woodworking capability or B) pyramid structures. Put simply, rock is heavy, and it does not do well in long, flat sections like floors. That's why we put rebar in concrete, and why we have supporting beams underneath concrete floor systems. Woodworking lets you build a more sophisticated structure (more interior space), while a pyramid structure gets taller.

One thing that building up does is it allows for a higher population density, which is excellent for cities. Cities (and permanent buildings in general) mean agriculture, which means that we're looking at the Neolithic period (or later). That's also going to give you organized labor to pull from, as well as possible written records (not always, but usually).

We see plenty of two-story buildings in the Neolithic and Bronze Age periods, such as the Palace of Nestor (Bronze Age) and Çatalhöyük (Neolithic). Looking beyond that, ziggurats get us even taller. Chogha Zanbil is a wonderful example of a large ziggurat. It had five levels and was ~53m tall by ~105m wide. A ziggurat is made by creating an artificial platform of mud brick, and then building successively smaller platforms on top of that. They're a form of step pyramid, and got to be quite tall.

The largest (and tallest) buildings are, by far, the pyramids of Egypt. The Great Pyramid of Giza (aka Pyramid of Khufu) was originally ~146m tall and ~230m on a side.

Often, when looking up settlements, we see mentions of settlement layers or levels. Çatalhöyük has 18, I believe. These aren't multiple stories of buildings, but are instead closer to bulldozing a site and just building right on top of the old stuff. That's how you end up with, say, Roman ruins under various European cities. They just got built over. Since you're looking at height, I wanted to go ahead and clarify that for you.

Overall, 200 meters is a lot. The Burj Khalifa is five times the height of the Pyramid of Khufu, and weighs about ⅙th of it. Stone is heavy, and building with it is, frankly, a lot of work. They had the advantage of canals and boats to bring up all the stone to the site, and it still took them 20 years. Now, mind you, many ancient structures were built over the course of generations. Ziggurats, temples, offices of administration… things are and were built over a long period of time (la Sagrada Familia is a good modern example).

If you want there to be minimal remains, well, free stone is free stone! Many ancient structures have been taken down that way.

I don't have a solid answer for you, but I hope this gives you a few ideas to think about.

Feral: If you want tall and ancient, look to the mountains. Literally. Raqmu, now known as Petra, in Jordan, is partially carved into a canyon. Probably not in its known form until the 3rd century BCE, it could still serve as inspiration for your worldbuilding. The cliff-dwellings of the Pueblo peoples in North and Central America could also act as inspiration for you. Although probably not built until the 12th century CE, caves are probably some of the first humans ever inhabited given the natural shelter they provide.

[autopotion]

Inconsequential things that frustrate me: I really cannot stand it when fans of something can't or won't acknowledge a perspective of the thing they like that is not wholly, effusively positive. Of course people can be rude or unfair if the critic is annoyed by the thing, but I'm also talking about the situation where, like, two people both generally had a positive experience with the thing, but Person A goes "but x thing didn't work for me" and Person B reacts condescendingly or with extreme offense or upset.

Like in this case I'm specifically thinking of Outer Wilds, which is a reddit darling, so you see it recommended all the time (regardless of, like... relevance). I love Outer Wilds! It was a cool game and it's in my top 50! But the way people talk about it, they act like it's the only mystery game with a heartfelt story ever made, and if you indicate that some things didn't work for you, they will mock you for not appreciating "games as art." This coming from a demographic that typically dismisses visual novels outright... Okay lmao.

It's just really annoying. Anyone who's followed me for more than a couple weeks knows I have no problem airing out my complaints about things I love. It's a critical part of engaging with media, to me. Not as like a "virtue signaling" thing, but like, if I want to make anything ever I want to get pretty good at picking apart what works for me and what doesn't! I love Dragon Age and despise the obnoxious elf racism worldbuilding. Final Fantasy has a pretty serious misogyny & transmisogyny problem; if we're talking about pettier quibbles, I deeply disliked the defanging of AVALANCHE in FFVIIR (a game I have also praised extensively for its characterization of Aerith), and I'm repeatedly frustrated by the many damsel plots & hanging plot threads re: relationships between women in FFT (my favorite game of all time!!). Transistor is gorgeous, and really fun, and uncomfortably homophobic. And even OUTSIDE of racism, misogyny, and homophobia, sometimes game mechanics don't work, and sometimes storytelling decisions fall flat, and I want to work out why they didn't work for me! I don't know!!!

It's just like... put yourself, briefly, in the shoes of someone who didn't care for some decisions in the thing you like, instead of, idk, mocking them? "I couldn't handle the flight controls in Outer Wilds" totally fair, they're an acquired taste, they were designed intentionally which I appreciate but it's not going to be for everyone; "I liked Outer Wilds but I don't think it's the most groundbreaking game ever made" LITERALLY NOT EVEN A NEGATIVE OPINION??? And that's the one that is CONSTANTLY derided and mocked on Reddit. "You don't get games as art, you pleb." I'm starting to think one of us doesn't, because a robust critic scene is part of what makes something art, and video games don't have that, much to their detriment, so the world of games journalism and even "sharing opinions online" is a shambles! IDK!!!

All I am saying is allow some space in your head for the acknowledgement of something you like not working for someone else. And it's not the end of the world. It's not even a value judgement. I've softened my hater attitude over the years but some knee-jerk defensiveness and cries of "well you must not really get it then" really make me want to pull my hair out.

[autolenaphilia]

I finished listening to The Magnus Archives many months ago. It is a horror audio drama podcast that was very popular here on tumblr. Yet i felt underwhelmed. It was okay, I guess? I felt that the statements were actually scary in the first two seasons, and by season 5 I was not scared at all, despite horrific things happening regularly.

Like there was nothing outstandingly bad in the writing. The characters were fine, nice representation of cis gays I suppose. Although the only trans woman being a single statement giver who doesn’t actually appear in the show is a bit disappointing. For me, perhaps the most important point of media representation is to get creative people from marginalized communities employed. I get it's a single-writer thing, Jonathan Sims writes every episode, but employing a trans woman actor to give the statement (something that happens with plenty of other statements) for the only transfem statement giver would be nice.

Well the only trans woman if you don’t count Nikola Orsinov. Oh Nikola, she is literally a man turned into an evil fake plastic mannequin/doll woman who hides her malevolence under an exaggerated cutesy performance of femininity and like Jame Gumb, steals skin to appear like a human woman. Giving potentially another meaning to the acronym TMA there, but I’ll give the writer the benefit of the doubt and say that’s probably not intentional. even if it does express some anxieties about gender. Besides, she’s my favourite villain by a long shot, Nikola Orsinov is a lot of fun.

I also disliked one of the canonical lesbian couples, Basira Hussain and Daisy Tonner. It's a typical example of the trope where the butch lesbian character is a cop, and on top of that, the series does a police brutality arc with them. It's not like women can't be violent cops, but like come on, Magnus Archives. When police brutality happens and a non-white lesbian like Basira is involved, they don't tend to be the perpetrator in the incident.

Anyway, the show was entertaining but felt underwhelming.

And I think I finally figured out why. It’s because the basic idea of the series is that it starts out seeming like a horror anthology series. It’s seemingly disconnected stories of people being menaced by the supernatural, with no explanation of what the supernatural actually is, as in most horror stories. The statements in Magnus can be good, solid horror fiction, if a bit derivative.

And then it reveals its true face: it’s actually a horror serial. The series actually has extensive worldbuilding which connects together and explains all those seemingly disparate stories.

The shift from horror anthology to serialized drama is frankly just awkward in general, it's such a radical shift in story structure. The show sticks with the statement structure for continuity reasons long after it makes any dramatic sense, when the story is carried forward by dialogue rather than any information gained from the various statements..They interrupt the story by the final seasons rather than develop them. In season 5, characters are literally annoyed with the statements because they interrupt the plot progression.

Yet the problem with this storytelling shift I think is far more deeper. That’s because I think horror is kinda antithetical to worldbuilding. I think horror needs some mystery to it, a sense of the unknown, of humanity being menaced by inexplicable forces. When you can explain the supernatural, as extensive worldbuilding tends to do, it ceases to be really scary. And The Magnus Archives has macabre and dark worldbuilding, but it also explains far too much. It tries to be a metafictional commentary on horror fiction, but it ends up showing how bad it is at understanding the genre

It presents these very genre-typical horror stories, with all their unexplained supernatural events and it seems writer Jonathan Sims saw their unexplained nature as a promise of a future solution instead of actually standing on their own. And that’s not how mystery works in the horror genre for the most part, and for good reason.

I’ve sometimes heard The Magnus Archives described as Lovecraftian, but looking at what Lovecraft said about horror in the classic Supernatural Horror in Literature, I think he would agree with me. “The oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown.” And in what he claimed in the true weird tale “A certain atmosphere of breathless and unexplainable dread of outer, unknown forces must be present; and there must be a hint...of that most terrible conception of the human brain—a malign and particular suspension or defeat of those fixed laws of Nature which are our only safeguard against the assaults of chaos and the daemons of unplumbed space.“

This is a kind of horror ethos that is antithetical to worldbuilding. Worldbuilding maps out and explains a setting’s fantastical elements, which works best for a kind of Tolkienian fantasy, whereas horror relies on the unknown. Lovecraft’s Cthulhu mythos is often seen as the kind of explanatory worldbuilding Magnus engages in, but that’s something his lesser imitators such as August Derleth engaged in far more than Creepy Howie himself. It’s an impression created more by the Call of Cthulhu RPG than Lovecraft’s stories.

M. John Harrison’s criticism of worldbuilding is also relevant to The Magnus Archives:

“When I use the term “worldbuilding fiction” I refer to immersive fiction, in any medium, in which an attempt is made to rationalise the fiction by exhaustive grounding, or by making it “logical in its own terms”, so that it becomes less an act of imagination than the literalisation of one. Representational techniques are used to validate the invention, with the idea of providing a secondary creation for the reader to “inhabit”; but also, in a sense, as an excuse or alibi for the act of making things up, as if to legitimise an otherwise questionable activity. This kind of worldbuilding actually undercuts the best and most exciting aspects of fantastic fiction, subordinating the uncontrolled, the intuitive & the authentically imaginative to the explicable; and replacing psychological, poetic & emotional logic with the rationality of the fake. “

This is harsh, but describes the problem of The Magnus Archives quite accurately. I would add that in horror this kind of worldbuilding also undercuts any genuine horror. The “rationality of the fake” is no substitute for fear of the unknown. Supernatural horror without any mystery regarding the supernatural things just becomes a depiction of fantastical torture.

In season 1, the Archivist tries to deliver "rational" explanations for the supernatural events described, and they deliberately ring hollow. It reads as a man trying desperate to shore up his worldview against events that defy them, showing a "malign and particular suspension or defeat of those fixed laws of Nature" It's a classic horror writing trick. But by season 3, the archivist knows the basics of the story's worldbuilding, and starts explaining the statements with a new supernatural logic, which is shown to be correct.

And Sims doesn't seem to realize that he has simply replaced a naturalistic rationality with a supernatural "rationality of the fake." The stories in the first two seasons show the supernatural disrupting the laws of normal existence, and are therefore scary. Yet then the story creates a new "safeguard against the assaults of chaos" in the form of worldbuilding explanations of these events. Its fantasy with a lot of suffering, rather than horror.

The Magnus Archives might seem like a story that is very certain of itself. It has built this extensive worldbuilding construction to explain its every fantastical flourish, and even its genre and medium. We get explanations for genre staples such as "why are people able to give such articulate and clear statements of horrific and traumatic events?" And because it's yet another audio drama that has a "found footage" or rather a "found recordings" gimmick, we even get an explanation for why everything plot relevant is recorded.

Yet this is to mask a deep uncertainty, as it clearly feels a need to deeply justify its fantasy. A story that was more genuinely certain of itself would allow things to remain unexplained and not need to justify its own flights of imagination.

I don’t care much about spoilers, but I have some further more specific thoughts under the cut. I won’t summarize and explain concepts and plots from the series because it’s boring to write, so think of this as supplementary criticism for those who have listened to Magnus.

The problem with The Fears as explanations is that they are so boringly anthropomorphic. In fact they are explicitly explained in the final episode as arising from the human emotion of fear, a final bit of worldbuilding that adds explanation at the cost of actual horror.

And their motivation is so boring, in that they are basically sadists, whose goal with everything they do is to create fear in humans. It’s such a mundane motivation for interdimensional amorphous powers. That’s about as scary as the serial killers in the most boring kind of mystery and horror fiction, which is not much.

And it sucks all the actual surrealism and imagination out of the setting. Anytime Magnus borrows from surreal horror fiction, it’s not actually surreal, because everything is explainable. Things are surreal because surreal supernatural events scares humans and the supernatural entities want to scare humans. So things that are meant to be surreal horror like the Stranger ritual in the season three finale or most of the hellscapes in season five aren’t actually surreal.

Speaking of season five. For all my criticisms of the series overall, I have to praise the season four finale. It ends on a revelation that the supposed hero’s effort were all meaningless and that actually he has been manipulated into bringing out the apocalypse he hoped to prevent. This revelation is really effective tragedy, especially as it comes after what seems to be a happy ending for him and his partner Martin. Good shit, the series could very well have ended there. It would be a bleak ending, but that fits a horror series.

Yet then the series continues with another season. And by this time the transformation into Tolkienian worldbuilding fantasy is complete. The story of season five is how Frodo and Sam must journey through Mordor to defeat the eye of Sauron by destroying the source of his power. Sorry, I meant that Jon and Martin must journey through hellscape Britain in order to defeat the rule of the Eye and destroy the source of its power. The parallels are obvious.

This season feels so unnecessary, a fantasy quest to undo the tragedy of the fourth season finale. And they largely do, Jon and Martin are gone, but the fears leave the world. It is all justified with the worldbuilding, but again ending on this note of world-saving heroic sacrifice has barely anything to do with horror.

The hellscapes of season five are dark, but they are not effective horror. It’s the final confirmation that Jonathan Sims did not truly understand why his horror stories in the earlier seasons were so effective. And that was because they were set in a largely realistic and contemporary world. People living mundane lives before they are menaced by the supernatural. Most horror fiction does this, not only because it gives a “it can happen to you” quality but because horror most easily comes from taking a safe, mundane and explicable world and subverting that with unexplained and frightening supernatural events.

The Magnus Archives does have stories like that and they work, but then it undermines it by explaining the supernatural in rationalistic terms. And in season 5, it even takes away the mundane setting. Now almost everyone except the servants of the entities live in hellscapes literally designed to make them suffer over and over again. There is no longer any normal world to provide contrast, just entire landscapes of torture. It may sometimes present bitter parodies of realistic situations, but so removed from real life that is hard to connect with or regain the sense of horror from those early stories.

And again, because the rationalistic worldbuilding of The Magnus Archives there is no real surrealism to these hellscapes, because why they exist is explained. There is just torture and no mystery or wonder to the fantasy of season 5. It’s just suffering for the sake of suffering, the worst and least interesting kind of horror. And it’s a deep-seated problem within the show, developed to its utmost extreme.

It's fiction that feels the need to justify itself at literally every turn. It doesn't dare have something happen without explaining why. So we get this fake surrealism, where if anything weird happens it's because supernatural powers want to scare people with the weirdness.

Apparently there will be a sequel, a Magnus Archives 2, despite earlier promises there would not be. And considering the original show went on for far too long and explained its world too much to be truly scary, I don’t think there is much fruitful to be gained there, but we’ll see.

[caffeinosis]

I was thinking unpopular opinions on major POV characters and plotlines as well as GRRM as a writer. For example, some of mine are is that I find J/on very, very bland and boring, Da/ny is also bland and comes off as one note and very silly at times, I think GRRM gets too much credit for how he writes women, the Stark favoritism in his work is annoying and eye roll worthy, and I think he's a lot less clever and intentional as the fandom claims when it comes to his writing.

As for the fandom - tar/g nation as been a disaster for the fandom in general and the younger fans that got into the series, so the 18-24s, are insufferable lmao. A lot of people have projected a story that is not there and are unwilling to meet GRRM where he is at.

Sorry, anon, went to bed early yesterday and today I got distracted.

Yeah, I agree with a lot of this.

J/on, I find bland as well, but I don't mind reading his chapters that much because at least he's usually surrounded by more interesting characters. I do like D/ny but the worldbuilding around her is extremely frustrating to me. I feel like she's surrounded by mostly one-one characters, her antagonists tend to be caricatures and her story is still so disconnected from the main plot, 5 books in. I don't dislike either of them (at least not the book versions) but they don't even make my top 10 characters list.

I don't mind the S/tark favoritism, and I actually wish GRRM would focus a bit more on the North. Somehow, it's still one of the least fleshed out regions in Westeros, considering it's the main characters' home. But I suppose he's saving all that for the last books, which means we'll never get it.

Couldn't agree more about T/argnation.

And another thing I find completely obnoxious about this fandom is people equating "I think this will happen" to "I want this to happen". Sorry, we're picking up what the writer is laying down I guess. Or people arguing that something couldn't possibly happen because it would be racist or sexist or otherswise problematic. That's just giving grrm too much credit.

[cashandprizes]

you... are trying to get my ass in trouble. I'm into it. Thanks for sending the ask <3

Link to the choose violence post here!

1. the character everyone gets wrong

It's probably going to be Alexis. I support women's rights and wrongs, but I think she was in a damned if you damned if you don't situation. Is she just gonna let Sam bleed out? He lived and found his soulmate, or whatever, and seems pretty damn happy all things considered. I want to die as much as the next person but... idk. Doesn't seem like there were any good choices.

2. a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom

This discourse doesn't really apply to me because I'm a 100% switch on the bdsm test (yes, this is documented) and so I always love switching. And since my fave is either Guy on a good day or Regulus on a bad day, there is only the switch variant. I was never that kind of shipper, even back in my hardcore anime days.

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

This will sooooo get me in trouble. But between the "I want to break Alexis's ribcage" and the "people who don't hate [redacted] ship are [long list of words calling people evil and abusive]" and the "if you write dark content or support Erik writing darker content you don't care about people who have experienced xyz" they're all pretty bad. I will not be screenshotting even though I think there's mutual blocking going on, but just know that I'm pretty sure the only reason I didn't also get death threats a month ago was because I had already blocked that person over something else.

Oh also? I hate the idea that the fandom needs to be welcoming to minors as a whole. I love when youths are into a fandom and make friends online, because that's what I did when I got on Tumblr pretty much a decade ago! I'd just like them to do it in their space for minors while I do things in my space for adults. I'm gonna be a whore and I don't need somebody's mama scrolling through their Tumblr and trying to be mad at me when I clearly say minors DNI. I don't understand why I have to make myself kid friendly when I tag my shit and make my stance clear. Literally what it says on the tin.

4. what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?

I did at one point go through the Alexis tag and just block... so many fucking people for bad Alexis takes. I block A LOT of people without ages in their bio. I tend to block liberally, actually. Um, something that really annoyed me was realizing people couldn't understand don't like don't read. Instant block.

9. worst part of canon

This is a joke but I want more worldbuilding lore of how society functions. I love the lore for like the sky gods and all the old magic but I JUST WANT TO KNOW PRACTICAL SHIT. What happens when vampires go in the sun and does it change with age? How alive are vampires? Why don't my wolf shifters have knots, this is a real problem for me. How big are magical cities? How big is Shaw security? How big are most packs? Do all shifters form some sort of pack/collective group? How do empowered people get access to empowered resources or the internet or radio or tv? Do vampires piss?

I need answers.

Also. When will Erik finally write me the Avior BA using Calico's fic?

More realistically, I wasn't super satisfied with the Quinn ending which isn't a big deal, but I definitely felt like Darlin got wubified by Sam and David at the end. I'm sure some people liked them taking control, but that's the last thing I'd want. Just personality differences and also not the worst thing.

10. worst part of fanon

Why is everyone white?

I've never not been black so I'm used to this in fandom spaces at this point, but goddamn. Racism really is everywhere. Minority solidarity is more mythical than fucking unicorns.

[syncogon]

misc thoughts fresh off finishing yumi and the nightmare painter: 

* i should’ve taken my time reading this ahaha. books definitely hit different when savored and on larger screen/pages

- there were some tropes i didn’t like here, like painter pretending to yumi to be all cooler and more heroic than he actually was = cringe when it comes falling down. at least that part was relatively short. but like digging a hole with your lies ughhhhhhh hate that hate misunderstandings hate people not believing you when you tell the truth 

- was not convinced to care about the side characters. they didn’t really get any development. i wasn’t even sold on the old friend group being friends with each other - their banter wasn’t that good, and I’m sensitive to this kinda thing atm since I’m in my own struggle of writing convincing and interesting friend group interactions - nor were they written particularly compellingly as individuals. akane was kind but that was about it. i love the sleepless as a concept and masaka was great but she really came out of nowhere to help. and liyun could have used more development 

- speaking of masaka this is a hot take as a cosmere fan but i think there’s a point where the cosmere references get too much and detract from the story at hand. felt that a bit with lost metal, at times with tress, and definitely here. 

- hoid’s narration - i thought it fine in tress, suited the fairytale storytelling tone, but his comments felt kind of more annoying and distracting and out of place in this one. at least he had an actual role in tress...

+ the twist was very cool, big fan, i was totally misled, but 

- the reveal was... the fact that what happened was so complicated that it needed SUCH a big exposition dump, i was not a fan. like im grateful to hoid that he knew i was confused. but it shouldn’t have been so confusing, there had to have been a better and more elegant way to present what happened 

- and im still a little confused about what we saw of yumi’s world was real 

- also like who were the actual aliens they encountered lmao we’re just moving right along

+ so i was ready to throw hands when i saw “epilogue”. and then “another epilogue” ahaha. to be fair that sad ending was still a good ending itself but god i would’ve been so upset hahaha

+ the ending made me feel things. almost eked out some tears. such a good ending overall.

+ the art ahhhhhhhhh so pretty. def my fav artist / artwork of the four (i’m just a big fan of this kind of aesthetic. traditional korea + futuristic japan) 

- though i was a little disappointed with the cover. not sure why. the pure outlines don’t stand out very well and the text font/color... idk... 

* for some reason i thought that the colors being cyan and magenta meant that there’d be significance in the missing third color yellow or lime or smth. i thought there was a WoB or smth. oh well 

* are maipon sticks actually any different from chopsticks. why not just also call them chopsticks. 

- i think the preview chapters gave me expectation that there’d be a bit more with their respective magics and worldbuilding which were so cool and i wish we saw more of that, b/c that kind of stuff interests me more. top tier aesthetics for these worlds. but i guess this was always supposed to be more “inward” and more focused on the romance... 

- i think i didn’t find yumi or painter super likable on a personal / personality level either. this is kind of a me thing though. i know they’re supposed to be Like That with their backgrounds, histories etc. i suspect i’d appreciate them more on reread.

- oh yeah and i want to know more about the other yoki hijo too! 

+ this is a pretty focused book even if i do want to know more. i can respect that. like how this was a lifeswap not a bodyswap, allows for keeping the focus on the story he wants to tell 

+ will admit it was super funny that painter was seen as yumi but yumi was still just seen as herself 

+ was gonna cry at the introduction of the Machine to replace Art. but then it was like, maybe it’s worth it if it saves any other girls from suffering the - abuse, basically - that yumi had to go through? but in the end the Machine is unequivocally the evil here 

+ i do love yumi Stacking Things whenever stressed ahaha

this sounds like a lot of negative points but those are more interesting to talk about and those are what come to mind quickly esp since i’m just pulling thoughts out very quickly and haphazardly here. to some extent the good parts go without saying and id appreciate them more on (a slower) reread and tbh i might make a follow up post as i think more on this. i think i was just a little disappointed bc i came in with really high expectations... ah well. still a good book overall, and i want to give it a reread to better understand and catch some things. i think my current ranking is tress > yumi > frugal 

but im gonna hit post for now to forcibly stop myself from adding more

[neon-moon-beam]

I hope you enjoy the dlc! I liked it a lot, and as someone who just likes your opinions, i'm looking forward to seeing what your thoughts are.

Spinarak is adorable!

Spoilers ahead.

Pros:

The story felt a lot stronger than the mainline game for the most part. Maybe it was because it was shorter but Arven and Nemona's storylines really felt like too little too late.

The plot twists were interesting enough, and I'm interested to see where the cliffhanger goes.

I liked that it starts off looking like Carmine is going to be a bully and a problem, but it turns out she's actually rather complex and shows her true personality really quickly. And whereas you think Kieran is going to grow in a different way (like standing up to Carmine), he instead turns out a bit worse off (which is also nicely complex characterization!) Both of them also seem to have some kind of issues going on the background, so I'm curious to see if the second DLC covers it.

It's nice to see some Pokemon that had stayed Dexit'd for a while. Yes, some were in BDSP, but BDSP is a top down game and it doesn't feel like it's happening in...let's just say a more organic space. There's also no way to interact with you Pokemon in BDSP other than just talking to them if they're walking with you.

I liked getting new clothes and hairstyles with the Teal card. I changed into one of the new hairstyles.

Poltchageist and Sinistcha are nice. They make me want to drink matcha more.

It was nice to get a new area to explore. Part of the reason I stopped really playing Violet at all post-game was Paldea felt very empty with nothing to do.

Mossui really does feel like a rural Japanese town.

Ogrepon is cute.

Cons: Not a lot of new music. The main theme plays nearly everywhere and after 20 mins or so it gets very boring.

Not happy about the PLA stuff at all. I don't want an Adaman descendant, I don't want Hisuian variants, I don't want an event similar to PLA with music remixed from it. I don't want any PLA. The game caused too much damage.

Kieran feeling betrayed seemed a bit forced? Like, the player is just honoring his grandfather's wish to not share the story with him yet due to his age and he goes from feeling betrayed to practically resenting the player when he cannot defeat them. Him comparing himself to Ogrepon when Carmine and the player left him out of the loop (again, honoring what Carmine and Kieran's grandfather asked) felt overdramatic and...not comparable at all? (But then again kids just do that kind of thing) Also he expected Ogrepon to just go with him when he hadn't bonded with it at all. Carmine even says that Ogrepon's feelings are also important but he just ignores it. He's got a lot to learn, and I hope we see him learn it.

The glitchy backgrounds are still happening. My Eelektross breaks the ground revealing the massive ocean that is responsible for a lot of glitches (the ocean is literally too big for the game), and the walls sometimes do that jiggly thing that makes some people feel queasy when they see it.

The festival stalls are disappointing. At first I was excited to see what new foods they have. I mean yeah, it's annoying that most shops in SV just open up a menu and make you feel like Paldea favors cooking over everything else, but sometimes it's nice to see the worldbuilding with the food. However there are only 8 stalls, one of which you can't even interact with, and 4 of them are the same! There's two candied fruit stalls and two shaved ice stalls! They really couldn't just make two more new stalls, or at least change the menus on two of them? I've been to carnivals and festivals IRL and yeah, there are often repeat stalls (though usually at bigger events), but there are also stalls that sell similar things but are made by different brands.

I was hoping for a bigger variety of jinbei and masks. I really don't want Pikachu and Eevee things again. I'm very much over those two. And while I liked being able to switch from the uniform to the jinbei, I still don't like that I'm forced to wear between a handful of pre-created outfits that clash horribly with most of the accessories.

The landscape feels old fast, and empty like Paldea. A lot of it is the same kind of landforms, just arranged differently. The only unique thing was the Infernal Pass.