#this is only a SMALL rambling ok. it could be worse

[koumeowkami]

Argopro... I still have to get into it wehg... BUT. can you ramble a bit Abt it to me?? Your favorite character, bands, ship, whatever, just have fun!!! <33

oh my god there's SO MUCH to say but words just don't come out like i would (i also suck at explaining things). i'll try to make a coherent rambling lol

i'll start from the fact that i'm the most predictable person ever cause if there are any tsun characters in a franchise, it's impossible for me not to kin them.

so, nayuta asahi.

nayuta is essentially like paralive's kanata (THIS IS DESTINY) and that includes being rude to everyone, having a constant pissed off face, zero social skills, anger issues and having faith in nothing but music. he's insufferable sometimes but hey, that's his charm <3 he has asthma and his dad (the biggest asshole ever) told him he's worthless cause he can't sing like that. he hates his dad for that and also cause he left him and his mother alone. he has trust issues because of it. i think he needs some friends (he will never admit he has them). oh he also has a soft spot for his cat nyankoutaro <3

his band is gyroaxia!! my fav guys ever. they invented metalcore i think. their dynamic is funny cause they argue 24/7 but they're lowkey a family yk. basically everyone in there is a nayuta simp except for reon (guitarist) who literally can't stand him. the others also admit he's insufferable but they all believe in the power of his music, hence the reason why no one leaves the band lol (even tho nayuta would throw anyone out if they're not good enough to "share" his music). no one dares to complain to nayuta apart from reon but at least ryo is pretty chill about it, he just gives him candies to shut him up LMAO (i also love him a normal amount). i also love the irl band a lot, their seiyuus are basically my best friends and they're chaotic af - here's a pic cause they just dropped it and i cried

here's a bit about nayuren (nayuta + ren) too. as i said, they're basically like kanallen. even tho ren is less invasive and more on the shy type of guy, he's still really passionate about music and wants to befriend everyone who thinks the same so he just annoys nayuta (lovingly). they're even in the same class at uni so nayuta can't literally ever have a moment of peace. btw nayuta said that ren's singing is the only thing that has ever moved him and he probably considers him at almost his level <3 so he basically loves him

this got unnecessary long lmao sorry </3

[arolesbianism]

Congrats to unit swap Kohane and An for both getting a new song on the playlist and also apologies for all the doomed toxic yuri I'm gonna dump on y'all (is not sorry)

[divinebastet]

this keyboard i got for my tablet is actually so nice i wish that my tablet wasn't such a piece of shit

i paid $10 and it has a better design and quality of materials than the most expensive laptops i've used

[chrispotatos]

quit - chris sturniolo

summary: you had a stressful day at work so chris suggested you quit.

warning: none unless you're allergic to having chris as your bf.

a/n: i may or may not be projecting

a/n 2: i might only be able to write quick little stories like these then write smut and angst on the weekends because it takes me longer to write those generes than cute little fluffy shit.

my whole week was bad and it consisted of the same cycle on repeat work, eat nap. i could hardly see my boyfriend and my friends because of my busy schedule and when i wasn't with at work i was in my apartment trying to recollect myself.

today was friday and i promised chris i would come over to their house and stay till monday rolls around.

don't get my wrong i was itching to get there but i wanted peace and quiet. after all my social battery was drained and it felt like any minute i could cry if someone asked 'what's wrong' the feeling of taking my anger out on my friends and boyfriend because of a stressful day made my emotions subside by a little so something like that doesn't happen

i arrived and didn't hear anything i walked up the stairs and still no talking, laughing, nothing.

i took that as a sign they weren't here at all maybe they were filming. i leave chris a text letting him know im there.

i go down to his room and pick out some clothes that got cleaned from the last time i was here. the tub in nicks room was the only one that was here so i used it, putting in epsom salt and a bath bomb with a lack of scent so my headache doesn't get even worse.

when my bath was done i went to the kitchen and got ice cold water then headed back to his room.

i tried picking a movie but my thoughts flooded with what happend today and how my manager was yelling at me even though i was confused and needed clear instructions.

the thought made tear unwillingly fill my eyes and fall, it stung remembering the harsh words the way she made me feel small and disrespected.

i heard the triplets voices, slight bickering the front door closing after, i knew chris was gonna be coming to his room shortly after so i went under the blankets.

my predictions being correct the door to his room opened and he called for my name. i hummed as a response, that not being enough he came over to my side of the bed peeling the blankets off of my body.

"y/n, baby are you okay?" he asked worry coating his expression i cover my face crying more.

that question always tipped me over the edge "no im not okay, my boss- megan no maya i mean-" a frustrated grunt is all i could get out from all the clouded confusion. "it's ok take your time" he rubbed my arm being patient with me and thats what i needed right now.

"-my manager is a bitch and she was yelling at me. im tired and i don't wanna be mean but im so stressed out" i explained, it was more of a ramble with some words getting mixed together cause of the speed i was talking in.

"im so sorry" his arms wrapped around me, pulling me towards him, and rubbed my back while whispering comforting words to me, reassuring that everything will be all right.

"you should quit" he suggested i shook my head no, i couldn't quit it wasn't gonna work if i did my life would only get worse.

"no one should get treated that way especially you, you don't deserve that and it shouldn't have a toll on you. it's fucked up"

i draw back from the hug by a bit to see the sympathetic look on his face, he really felt bad for me and i know he couldn't wrap his head around why i wouldn't just quit if im being treated in such ways.

"it's not in my cards to just quit" he smiled unbeknownst of what he was thinking i reciprocated an awkward smile "I'll take care of you, you can move in with us" he stated it wasn't an offer he wanted me to do it.

"im not letting you do that" a humorless chuckle left my lips. chris wiped the tears that were left and kissed my forehead "yeah you will" he muttered giving me a endearing smile taking the glass of water off the night stand pressing the glass to my lips, i took a few sips then he put the glass back down and tucking me in.

"I'll come back in a few, i just need to talk with matt and nick real quick then take a shower and I'll be all yours for the rest of the day"

i nodded from where i was, snuggling into the blankets "love you y/n" he said on his way out even if he couldn't hear me i said it back.

[dinasangel]

IF YOU WANT .

cowgirl!abby x reader

summary ; after having seemingly nothing ahead of you for what felt like years but was really just months, your mother finds a new opportunity for you, a new purpose to linger in your life, but is it made for you?

cw ; switch!abby, switch!reader, slow burn, southern au, eventual smut, abby denying her feelings for the longest time ever, hair braiding!! , catching butterflies, will-they-won't-they, arguments but coming from a nice place , closeted/unsure!abby, sharing a bed, slight homophobia, teaching abby how to play a piano, cuddling on accident and on purpose, slight praise kink from both sides, abby teaches you how to ride a horse , dancing!!, baking, injury , reader is scared of dogs ok , NO use of y/n , rrrrrr idk this will probs be added to

a/n ; is it ok that i added stuff to the content warning that'll be in future chapters just not this one and isn't all smutty stuff or is that not ok????? also sorry the caps are ugly i feel improper without them.

A slick heat beat down on your hair, snuffing any previously made attempts at improving it's state, and the journey you had just taken had worn you of any care for it by this point. Growing up in England only made matters worse, severely unpreparing you for this sort of weather, and you dreaded the fact that this was all you'd be feeling for who knows how long. Suitcases were hauled from your mother's car , safely situated at your side before she brought you into a crushing hug, one that had you groaning at the pressure.

"Make sure you write, you know how worried me and your father'll be." She said sternly, hands holding your shoulders.

"Yeah, I know. I will." You replied just as adamantly.

"Okay, good. You make sure you have fun now, okay? Oh , and remember-" your mother rambled on , which you were sure was just her way of keeping you back longer.

"Remember my manners, yeah, I got it." You interrupted. You truly were going to miss her and your father, but you were sure if she was here any longer she might just cave and stay eith you, which you did not want. A warm smile curled against her lips, crows feet appearing at the corners of her eyes.

"Look at you, my sweet girl, all grown up." She sighed dreamily and you couldn't help but grin, eyes rolling lightheartedly.

"Yeah, yeah." You dismissed, bringing her into one last crushing hug before exchanging small 'goodbyes' and 'i love you's' before she reluctantly got back into her car and headed off, leaving you to sit on a bench, awaiting your ride.

Your mother had been friends with a man called Jerry Anderson for longer than you could recall, and after one of their most recent catchups, the topic of you had eventually been picked up. You had always been a good student, exceptional grades whilst maintaining a stable social life and everyone had always expected big things from you, only once you had graduated university, your whole life had come to a standstill and it was starting to look like you'd be living at home forever. That was until Jerry brought up the fact his daughter, Abby, could use some tutoring, and it was settled before you'd even known ; you were going to tutor his daughter.

You didn't know why, nor did you even care really. As long as it gave you something to do with your life , you would do it. Being a picture perfect role model and ending up this way was no short of humiliating , and no amount of concealing it from everyone else could hide the truth from yourself.

"Tsch, what the fuck is this signal?" You groan quietly as you attempt to do anything with your phone to distract you from the boredom looming over your body and the nervousness pooling in your stomach, filling the gaps between you organs in a sickly warm way. Thankfully for you, a truck pulls up , usefully arriving at the exact time discussed. This never would've happened back home. You hate the fact you feel homesick already.

A door opens and you stand up, shaking the hand of the man in front of you. He's taller by a few inches, maybe 3 or 4, hair which is seemingly quite long done up in a neat ponytail and you're almost jealous of the way it sticks better than your hair, messily braided by yourself, a skill you've never mastered. You're sure you could, but between studies and friends and family, you'd never had the time.

"So you're the one who's gonna be putting up with Abs, huh?" He teases playfully with an accent you weren't expecting, sounding far more Spanish than Southern, pulling his hand away to grab your suitcases, an act of chivalry you're not too acquainted with.

"Abs?" You questioned.

"Oh, Abby." He corrected. You nodded in recognition, slightly humiliated you didn't link the two.

"Yeah, I guess." You say, climbing into the passenger seat of his burgundy truck. The seats are slightly worn, objects strewn across here and there, but nothing grotesque. He gets in and starts the engine up before beginning to drive. A heavy silence hangs in the air, once he seems to be a lot more comfortable with in comparison to your agitated state.

"So...what's she like?" You ask reluctantly, unsure on whether making conversation is a food idea. You don't even know him, and you're not sure he's worth getting to know.

"Abby? She's smart, really, just not got the right knowledge to get outta this place. Listens real well too, always got an eye for seeing things about people. She's nice to be around, awkward if you don't know her though. Real funny too, but don't tell her I said that." He explains. His carefree attitude irritates you slightly. This is all business to you.

"Why's she want to leave?" You ask, testing the waters, unsure od where the boundaries lie. Manny shrugs his shoulders.

"I never really asked. Why'd you leave?" He counters, confusing you.

"Huh?"

"I mean, you had this whole life n now you're here, what's up with that?" He explains himself, eyes flicking to you slightly before returning to the road.

You shrug slowly, staring down at the objects you can see here and there.

"Dunno. Just...not much left for me back there, or something." You say vaguely. He doesn't pry, which you like.

"So, what's England like?" He asks.

You find yourself settling into a comfortable conversation with him, the soft sound of music playing on the radio as a mere background noise. You find you don't dislike him as much anymore.

The town is small, definitely smaller than anything you've ever seen, and it's equally shocking how friendly everybody is. Every person you pass says hey or at least waves. It should decrease your nerves and allow you to relax a little, but it has you even more jittery. You're noticing how much you stand out even more as things go on. Most people are dressed in shorts , dresses, tank tops, skirts, anything that let's what little cool breeze circulate their body and suddenly you wish you'd acquired more taste in clothes that go beyond your usual jeans , long or occasionally short sleeved shirt and converse combo. You make sure to make a mental note to go shopping as Manny continues to drive.

A wooden, clearly old house (though better described as a cottage) slowly emerged into view. The paint was cracked in some areas, however other parts looked freshly applied, so, putting two and two together, you assumed there was renovations being done.

"So...how many people, y'know...fit in that?" You asked Manny, unsure there was going to be enough space for everything.

"Oh well, Abby has her own place not too far from here so it's actually just been her dad." He explained as they pulled up into the dirt driveway before getting out. You went for your suitcases, slightly protective over them in such a unfamiliar setting, but Manny was quick to wave you off, getting them out himself. You followed awkwardly behind, unsure of yourself ; wondered if it was too late to turn back now.

"Manny, hey!" Jerry called out, leaving his position on the couch to wrap Manny up in a hug before holding his hand out to you.

"Hey, it's so good to see you." Jerry greeted politely. You have a slight smille, your mother's words lingering in the back of your mind.

"You too."

"I'll go check on your room. D'you want a drink or anything?" He asked to which you shook your head.

"No thank you."

"Alright." He said before heading upstairs, leaving your eyes to scan the house. The place was well painted, a stark contrast to the outside of the house. Lace curtains adorned almost every window, walls covered in random paintings, some hand drawn personally, some purchased from nearby stores. A few coffee mugs lay out, a couple records here and there. It was warm, obviously lived in and taken care of. The wooden floorboards creaked slightly as you slowly moved along, trying to remain inconspicuous and subtle in your curiousness which felt lot like snooping to you. Your fingers reached out to run along the record player held on a tidy shelf, only filled otherwise with a plant and some cds for the car before you heard scrambling paws on wood and, before you could even move, a dog jumping up at you.

Your first instinct was to instantly recoil, retracting your hand back as you stepped back unsteadily. You did not like dogs. Small ones were tolerable at the most, but big ones were crossing the line by a mile, and this was a big dog. In all reality it just wanted to play and was excited by the presence of somebody new, but you couldn't consider that right now.

"Hey, Alice, c'mon, get down." A soft , almost silky smooth voice laughed awkwardly, a voice you were not yet familiar with. The dog - Alice - retreated, allowing you to look up qt the woman who had just entered. Dirty blonde hair, probably considerably long however the proper length went undetermined due to it being tied up in a tight braid. She was a little like an ox ; viisibly muscular, slightly taller by 3 inches , yet her demeanour was anything but. Her hand reached out to yours. You stared at it, unmoving.

"Hey, s' good to see you. I'm Abby." She greeted as warmly as she could. Abby. The girl you were tutoring. Your lack of movement and response caused her to pull her hand back awkwardly.

"Not much of a hand shaker?" She asked, clearly desperate to fill the silence hanging in the air like thick fog, threatening to suffocate the two of you.

"Not really." You lied, knowing full well you could still feel the texture of everyone's hands you had shaken on your skin (yes, everyone was two people). Today seemed to be going your way for a split second as Jerry came in, however all hope was quickly disintegrated.

"So uh, bad news. There's been a leakage in one of the pipes , the one right above your room and I wouldn't wanna make you stay in that." He explains, features and tone nothing but apologetic.

"Oh." You say. If a long journey with an over-emotional mother and heat that had your clothes sticking to you in the mosf uncomfortable ways humanely possible wasn't bad enough, this was the final tipping point.

"We can pay for you to stay at a motel for you for now but-"

"She can stay with me?" Abby interrupts, quick to add onto her words for a reason you can't quite place your finger on.

"Cause, y'know, she's my tutor and all so it's just easier than going back and forth to different houses and I can take the couch." She explains, rambling on and on incessantly, hands moving and curving. It'd be annoying if you weren't so exhausted.

"Okay yeah, if that's okay with you?" Jerry asked you to which you shrugged absentmindedly.

"Sure." You agreed.

If you thought the silence in the house around two other people was bad, you were infinitely wrong. Being sat next to someone you barely know in dead silence, only provided the whirring of the car to fuel your thoughts, was a nightmare. You could briefly notice her opening her mouth every so often , and you assumed that she was going to ask why you were here and for some reason couldn't. Her eyes constantly flicked to you, desperate you would say something first to do you both a favour. You didn't.

"So uh, why'd you-" she began.

"Hey, Abby? I really don't want to be rude but, I'm exhausted." You interrupted, pleading with everything in you that she would take the hint and be quiet, which thankfully, she did. You almost felt bad. Almost.

The rest of the car journey was done in silence, and you didn't even bother looking at her house nor examining the contents of it as though you were doing a quick in-and-out shopping trip, walking in and being lead up to her room , suitcases placed down before she rambled on about something you couldn't even grasp the concept of the second she opened her lips to speak.

"Um, anyways, g'night." She murmured, awkwardly going to leave the room. Watching her walk out of the door like a dog with it's tail between it's legs was enough for you to give in and soothe her nerves slightly with an exaggerated sigh.

"Hey Abby?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

It was the first time you'd seen her smile or look even slightly relaxed all day.

[plants-are-fun]

”it’s ok, just eat”

TW: ED!!!! PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH THIS!!

I have struggled with this in the past and it comforted me so hopefully it can do the same for others

toxic mom(same), toxic personal trainer

shitty writing

heavy angst, fluff, semi happy ending

Bf!chrisxEDgf

small use of y/n

Chris’s pov

—————————

i don’t know how I didn’t see it before. Every single time we went out to eat, y/n would pretend to eat. She would slide her food around, cut it, even offer me some, but she would never actually take a bite.

throughout our whole relationship she would be constantly tired and cold, but to be honest I thought that was just a woman thing. I wanted to have her in a car video, but she would refuse and her only reason was “i don’t want them to see me”. I didn’t push it, but that explanation never sat right.

as she started showing the desire to be in our videos, she started rapidly losing weight, but when I asked her about it she would just say it’s what her personal trainer had been working on. I should have pushed it.

so now, here we are in our minivan prepping to film.

“hey mama what do you want to eat?” I say going as matt pulls into McDonald’s. I look back and all she does is get red and start to fidget.

“it’s ok Chris I don’t need anything” She stutters. “Besides, if I were to eat I think that I would throw up. I’m so nervous”

“you need to have something to eat. These videos can get kind of long.” Nick says as he glances over at me looking worried. Matt nods.

“okay Nick just order her a dr pepper to make sure her blood sugar doesn’t crash” I look over to make sure that’s good, but all of the color previously is not drained from her face.

“U-um can you make it a diet?” She whispers.

I honestly just passed that as nerves.

After we got our food and we made it to a random parking lot, Nick passed out the food and may set up the camera.

“shit” she says

“what’s wrong ma?” At this point I am starting to get very worried.

“it isn’t diet.” She says. I look up at her and she looks like she could cry.

“it’s ok, I’m sure it’s not that big of a deal” I say obliviously. “Do you want a fry?”

she starts to stutter some excuse when Matt comes back in and Nick introduces the video.

After Nick starts some random argument with Matt I realize that something is seriously wrong. I can hear my girlfriends breathing start to get heavier and even her stomach growl.

“hey kid I can hear your stomach from here” I say handing her a couple of fries.

“I don’t want to take your food” she says

“it’s ok, just eat.” She takes a fry and starts to nibble on it. As Nick starts up on some dumb rant about his newest fear, I hear the car door slide open and running. Nick just stares at her in aw and starts laughing, but I’m already on my feet.

I run over to her as I hear gagging and heaving. I pull her hair back and rub my hand against her back.

as she comes back up all she is doing is sobbing and rambling apologies

“I’m s-so sorry I r-ruined your video I didn’t mean to I didn’t want to eat but I-i didn’t want you to ask questions! I’m sorry Chris please forgive me-“ I cut her off with a hug.

“baby what happened? Are you ok? What do you mean you didn’t want to eat? Do you feel sick”

I lead her to a sidewalk curb as she slumps over in exhaustion. She spills everything.

“my whole life my mom has always made me watch what I eat. She used to tell me to suck in my gut and all of that overbearing mother stuff. Then when I started dating you I had already not been eating much, but I really really wanted you to like me and I thought I was too big for that. So I cut back on my calories and went to the gym more. My personal trainer has been calling me fat. He says it’s for motivation but it’s just making it worse! Then when you said you wanted to introduce me to your fans, I just got so scared because I know how intense they are, so I stopped eating all together. But I didn’t think that it would backfire so much that I would ruin the video. I’m sorry Chris, I really am.”

she just leans her head against my shoulder and hiccups lightly.

I feel like the worst boyfriend ever for not seeing the signs. Sure, I’ve been busy, but only an oblivious asshole wouldn’t see the love of his life struggling so much.

“first things first, you didn’t ruin the video. Your safety is far more important. We also are going to FIRE that personal trainer. I’m so sorry I didn’t realize you were hurting until now. When was the last time you ate?”

“when we went out and I got that salad” my heart drops. “baby, that was 3 days ago…” she just starts crying again.

“it’s ok, let’s go get something light to eat. Maybe water based? Then we can go to the doctor, or get you a therapist.”

“ok” she whispers

“I love you so much baby” I say kissing the top of her head.

“we’ll get through this together.”

————————-

eek I can’t tell if that was good or not but I’m too tired for anything else 😥

[mollymooo]

cupid, send help!

spencer reid x GN!reader

Summary: Ahh, young love! Is what everyone in the BAU would say if either of you realized the other also had feelings.

an: IDIOTS IN LOVE YES YES YES if yall have any ideas send them my way im in a writing mood also there is a slight mention of y/ns eye color my bad gang

Garcia thought she was going to rip out her hair.

It had been a month since I had spilled the beans to Penelope about my small, tiny crush on Reid.

Ok maybe it wasn’t so small.

“Ask him out!” She leaned back in her chair as I nearly choke on my tea

“Absolutely not! He doesn’t even like me like that! Also do you realize how unprofessional that is! Not to mention the amount of paperwork and explaining there’d be. Plus, no one in-“ I’m suddenly cut off when Penelopes warm hands are planted on my cheeks with a firm squeeze

“Hun, I love you dearly but cupid needs to shoot you square in between the eyes.” She pats me on the back as I dejectedly head back to my desk. I notice Spencer leaning over Morgan and the sudden quick smacks to Spencer’s shoulder when I made eye contact with him.

“Yep! Thanks for the help Reid!” Morgan’s eyes snap back to his computer as he clicks around a few times and pulls up some bullshit article

“Anytime!” Spencer quickly stalks back to his desk and tucks his head behind his computer as I sit down at my desk across from Spencer, observing the exchange between the two

“What’d you help with?” I look over his computer to a hunched down Spencer with a tint of red across his face

“Oh, you know! Just some… work… stuff.” He coughed slightly and the blush only got worse as he spoke, a loud slap could be heard through the bullpen as Morgan face palmed at Spencer’s weak excuse

“…Right.” My eyes darted back to Morgan who shrugged slightly and went back to his work

———

I groaned slightly and rubbed my hands over my eyes. This is the 5th time this week my favorite mug has been placed on the highest shelf in the kitchen that I can’t reach. I reach up again and strain to reach but before I could reach it I notice a hand grab it and place it in my reach at last

I smile and spin around to be met with Spencers brown eyes, suddenly very aware of the lack of distance between us.

“Thanks!” A blush blossoms on my face as he takes the biggest step back from me and plays with a button on his shirt. He stutters a bit before saying something along the lines of “Your welcome” and quickly walks away

“You have to be kidding me.” I watch Penelope walk over to me and dramatically fall in my arms, nearly knocking my mug out of my hands “All my hard work to make it romantic, ruined! All because Reids IQ drops when he’s around pretty girl!”

———

I can feel eyes on me.

Spencer had been staring at me for the last 20 minutes, at least.

“Take a photo it’ll last longer” I smile slyly as I look up and make eye contact with him directly, but instead of him shyly looking away his eyebrows knot slightly

“Your eyes have a little green in them.” His head tilts slightly “And your mouth parts when you’re focused, just slightly.”

“Dr. Reid, are you flirting with me?” He doesn’t look away. His gaze looks even more focused while he studies my face like it’s the last time he’d look at it

“I’ve been trying too for a while.” He mutters before quickly realizing just exactly what he admitted

“Really? Wanna elaborate on that?” I giggle as his face bursts into a red haze

“I mean.. well, you’re very attractive and your personality only adds to that! There’s no reason why I wouldn’t like you..”

“Spencer.”

“You let me ramble and never made me feel bad for doing so.”

“Spencer..”

“Your incredibly sweet, and not to mention funny too-“

“Spencer!” He looks up from the spot on his desk he was staring at “Do you wanna get dinner after work?”

“Yes. Please.. I’d like that a lot.” His dopey smile takes over his face as you giggle

“Yes!” Penelope slaps a hand over her mouth as she watches your interaction from the balcony “You owe me $10 Morgan!” She points to Derek who groans

[gigglealongshiney-shadow-watcher]

Continue from this the Opal vr John fight. Winner was John.

(This takes place after the grounded event. So the continuity is a bit out of order. )

Trigger warnings for child suffering, delusional rambling, bleeding out, and possible disturbing imagery.

Opal's body pushes blood to heal the open wound, but her arm can't heal around the knife's touch. It's killing her. Without any fallback systems in place for her biology made by a God, there's no way for her to recover. Her legs weaken, and some snap off to prioritize the major wound. They crash to the ground loudly. No one dares leave their homes.

Her eyes wander, but there's nothing worth focusing on down there. How long before he comes to drive the knife into the rest of her body? She dropped the lady, and he said he'd hurt her worse than anything she felt if the lady died. He couldn't be dead, because he said something after he fell.

(Cut for length) for the singing, tunes inspired by nowhere king, candy hearts and paper flowers, and some of my own tune.

Opal

Phillip

How long did he want her to wait for? Maybe she should try to...run? With what? Did she have legs? She looked for them, and it looked like she did, but they felt like nothing. They weren't real anymore. That's nice, she doesn't need to think about legs anymore.

The blue soaks into her body from the puddle and comes back out. She watches it grow. It's pretty, and it glows a little, like a melted star. Is she full of stars? They must've melted inside her. She laughs and tries to touch the stars with her fingers, but the hand isn't listening to her right now.

Everything is dizzy and spinny. She doesn't want to be on the merry-go-round anymore. It's making her sick. She turns, and more stars leave her mouth. It hurts, stars hurt when they leave like that. The star puddle is cold. It feels good, she's too melty inside. Maybe the stars can help her up into the sky when they leave.

This must be how stars are born. They die and turn into rain bits. She liked cold rain, colder than the water cups in the kitchen. Then they come back out and have to fly away again. They'll want to take their mama with them. She didn't want to be a mama, but her stars make the meltedness in her hurt less, so it's ok. She can be their mama. The star puddle isn't flying away yet, maybe they're too scared.

"Iss...ok...t' fly." She could fly. When did she fly? Flying was fun, right? She was small, small babies flew away to neverland, someone said that once. Was she small enough to go to neverland? The stars could come with her. The stars will take her there. "T'nk you stars."

She's breathing for some reason. It rocks her head a little. It's nice, so she keeps doing that. There's a rocking chair in auntie's room that makes a little sound like a donkey. Auntie is dead now, like everyone else. She feels sad. Is anyone still alive, or is she all alone? They're waiting for her so the games can end and they can go home.

She tries to remember a name to give to auntie. It's not there. None of the names are there. Where did her name go? Someone lost their name in a forest. She lost her name there too and now she couldn't say her name or the forest girl's name. The only name that she could find was...

Phillip. That was a special name. It makes her head hurt less to think about. Phillip. Phillip is a special name that matters more than anything. Why is it so important? "Please...tell me..."

Phillip sat on the rocking chair with her. Phillip found crayons she could see. Phillip didn't laugh at her for not seeing anything but what the big people said was blue and yellow. Why wasn't everything blue now? Phillip was a special name. A forever name. He has her name and she has his. She hopes he brings her name back, she wants to see it again. He must miss his name too. He gave it to her, and now it's smudged and cracked. She got it all dirty when... when... She wasn't up here before, but where did she drop the name for it to get so messy?

Phillip would be mad she got his name dirty. He says it's ok when she drops her drawing in her food. Names are like drawings too. You make one and it's yours but you can give it to other people. Phillip drew lots of pictures with her. He doesn't draw anymore. Would he be mad?

She closes her eyes. The star puddle hasn't left yet... Phillip is a good name, it's an important name. Phillip said they'd get old together and go to Florida, his mom said that's where the old people go. Florida had alligators, those were cool. Maybe Phillip is in Florida waiting for her.

It feels good to close her eyes. It's good so she does it. The meltedness in her isn't as bad anymore, the stars are taking it out of her. They're so nice to her, it was too melty inside for her. It's good on her...what? Skin, that's what it is.

Phillip. It's important. He's important so important, where is he? She's shaking, and now the star puddle is too cold. It hurts! She tries to get away from the star puddle, they're mad at her because she didn't give them attention. That's what bad mamas get, pain for being bad. She's bad at being a mama, she doesn't want to be one at all.

"Help me..." She starts to cry. Why does it hurt? Her face is cold, and it's a bad feeling. It's so confusing, it's so dark, where did everything go? It hurts so much, he's back. He's come back and stabbed the knife in her eyes and it's dark forever he's going to stab her forever and she's in the dark now-

Something touches her arm. "You need to open those to get out of the dark." It's Phillip... he taps her eyes. She tries to open them, and it's hard to see anything. Her eyes hurt so much.

"Hi there." He's laying next to her on his chest, frowning at her. Phillip looks just like he does on the rocking chair.

"H-hi." She tries to focus on him.

"You got beat up again. I'm sorry I wasn't able to fight off Glen this time, I thought he was grounded." Phillip looks over her at something far away. "...that's not true, is it? That happened a long time ago, Opal. That's not why you're crying. You got hurt really badly today." Opal...that was her name...right?

Opal, the name still didn't feel right, reaches for him. He was important, but something was still missing. Why was Phillip so important? "It hurts..."

Phillip takes her hand and pulls her up to lean on the entrance to the roof. "It's all done now, no more make believe. Now we can go home and play something else."

"What do you mean?" Opal pulls away from him and falls back on the floor. Something is wrong. Something is bad. "What’s make believe?" The words feel familiar but they don't belong. "No, no it's wrong."

Phillip stares at her with disappointment. "Why can't you just play along? Why can't you just accept this? Look at me. I'm here! I'm perfect looking, isn't that enough for you? Why isn't this good enough to just go along with?"

Opal chokes and coughs, more blood pouring out of her mouth before she could ask him what's going on. Phillip growls and hits his open palm into her chest and makes her cough even harder. "Stop!"

"All you had to do was say ok! That's why you always got hurt! You can't just accept it, can you? You always need to know more, and it hurts everyone else! You couldn't just be happy with your eyes. You couldn't just be happy being Pokotho's special girl. You couldn't just be happy with your body and you made a mess of everything! It's all your fault! You know it is!"

Opal sobs and curls away from him. "I don't understand, what are you saying?"

Phillip rolls his eyes and stomps on her knife broken arm. "You're the worst friend in the world, Opal. Why do you get to fade away in a friendly happy little daze and I had to die that day in the battle? Why did you get to live? Why did you get to leave and do all those wonderful things when you don't even care enough to stay put? It's stupid! I hate you, I hate you because you got everything you wanted and I didn't get anything. You're the worst."

Phillip turns and stomps away. "What did I- why- wait..." Opal cries and curls into a ball. Her arms are too big, and her legs are too big and she's all alone. Opal is alone and Opal will always be alone. Opal doesn't deserve Phillip. Opal is useless.

The time ticks by, Opal and she wishes it would tick away and take her already. Opal is tired and in pain and hates all of this. Opal hates John for doing this to her. Opal hates everyone who left her like this and never stopped to ask her what Opal wanted. No one cared about her enough to think about her as anything but a servant. Or a cute pet to play mommy with. Opal hates life and every last bit of it because it only ever led her to more and more pain until she finally got here, and now Opal could finally lay down and die and leave this awful world behind. Opal can see it all and curse it for being there. Opal is tired. Opal gives up on it all and closes herself off from anything and everything forever. Opal is dying. Opal is dead.

............................

She opens her eyes and tries to find warmth. She watches her tears fall onto the floor and they sparkle at her kindly. She's sad to see them fade.

Through her arms, she sees something move in a stuttery, slow crawl. It pushes and wiggles itself into view. He tilts his head towards her and a sleepy eye meets hers. "I'm...late, but I'm here."

It's the voice, the good voice that makes her think of nice things like the flower around his neck. A flower she knows. "Are you..."

"I think so." He doesn't have much of a mouth to smile with, but he uses what there is to try. He rolls closer to her. "You are too."

She looks at him. "Do you want them?"

He nods. "Can I?"

She shakily opens her bag. Inside, in a shaped lining are his arms.

One is cleanly cut by Pokey without her permission, the other ripped and torn free. She pulls out the clean one first and he pushes himself up on the arm. Holding the second, she threads her hand through its fingers and he takes it back and squeezes her hand back.

Most of his face is gone, and the metal shards in the exposed bones of his skull poke out like spikes. "I missed you." He says. "You haven't visited in a while, but that's ok."

She leans on his arm. "I...broke it." Something broke that meant everything to her. What was it? Something tumbled out of her chest and lay between them. It was shattered. She had broken his candy heart. "I-I'm so sorry..." She starts to cry harder, shoulders shaking.

He hugs her close, and his flower brushes her neck. "You kept it, and that's what matters. I kept your flower, and now we're back together again." He doesn't breathe, but he's warm. "We can make new ones."

She leans against him and he helps her rest against the door downstairs. He curls up with her and looks at the stars in the sky. He's stained with the same thing she is. He's warm, and she's not, so she pulls him closer. He tries to smile again and holds her hand. "Where?"

"Up in the sky, we were gonna go together." He rests his head on top of hers. "We can always whether the weather~." He sings a bit of the tune she knows deep in her core.

"That's what keeps us together..." She sings it back. It's right. It's the song she wants and it's the song that is him. It's the song that is her.

His voice is the good one that she sings with all the time. Everyday they sing together. Everyday is better with him. "Candy hearts and paper flowers, sunset skies, with hundred' hues."

Rhymes and songs we sang, for hours. Words to say I'll love you true.

Times get bad, and then I worry! How I'll ever see it through... but our candy hearts and paper flowers, will always keep me close to you.

Will always keep me close to you!

He sings softer now, and his hands are in hers the way she wishes they were more. He hugs her arm the way that she hugs his when they aren't in the bag.

I'm sorry for breaking your promise, can you even still look at me?

I told you once and now again friend, we'll make a new one so let it be.

But is it hurtful to be with me? When I was so bad to you.

Hey, now, this candy heart is still a-loving, and that love is forever true.

She cries and changes the song, trying to meet him in the connection and joy of sharing music together.

I, missed you and I love you so much, I, wanted to grow you a bunch...of paper flowers so you could be joyful and such, I love you too.

Long days in a rut that was us, happy campers but the reasons turned to mush, so now on the edge of the pain ending rush! I'll hold you close.

They sing together, whatever things they want to say, all coming through in rhyme and lyric until she...starts to lose track of her words. They aren't making sense anymore. He finishes the song, and she tries her best to keep up.

We can, do anything now just come and, hold me close and then, we'll fly! Fly up in the beyond! You and me! Joyful and finally free, as the sunrise, blinds both of our eyes!

Candy, papers will wrap up the candy, flowers and hearts go side by side, and they're bound all their lives.

All their lives...

So now we, paper and candy go swiftly, hurry and run for the starlight! Run to the ground, below~.

For now that we can be eternally,

reunited, let's go live our lives!

We're united...let's go live our lives~

He smiles and takes her by the hand, the other rest on her cheek over the cut in her mouth. "It's time to go."

She closes her eyes and a small spark lights in her mind. Those words meant something a long time ago...

"Mmaaaamaaaaaaaa gooooo!"

A lady in white puts away her phone and looks at her lovingly. "Ok baby! Are you ready for the super duper tough workout?"

"Ya!!"

She gets on the lady's shoulders and she buckles and dramatically wobbles around. "Wooahhhhh I can't stay up! It's too tough a workout! Nooo, I'm gonna fall!"

"No! No no fall!"

The lady makes effort noises and puts her down on the table. "Phewwww, maybe we should just stay home today, I'm pooped." She grins.

"Noooooo! Candy!"

"Hmmm? What's wrong? Ohh I said we would go get some candy after going to the big gym! WelI I guess I have to then!" She laughs and takes her hand. "Alright. Time to go, kiddo!"

He waits for her and looks at the sky. "Are you ready?"

She shakes her head. "There's...more...need the lady first..."

He nods. "Ok, how do I get her?"

"Gotta...be alone looking..."

"I'll be right here waiting, ok? We're gonna make a new candy heart for you, and a new paper flower for me! Right?"

"Mmmmmmm...yeah, wait for me."

He kisses her forehead and hugs her arm tightly. "I did before, and I always will. Cuz I love you." His only leg is bent to go over some of her legs.

"Love you too...friends in...in..." She's so dizzy, and the stars are twinkling around her like little fairies.

"Friends in every weather, friends always together, friends until the very end of time!" He recites it better than she can. He drags himself out of her sight and she lays on her arms. She can't see anything anymore and her head is quiet.

It's a nice quiet. She can't go without the lady and tries really really hard to be loud. It takes all her power to do it. "Lady in white! I'm- I'm ready to go! I'm...ready to go White lady...go...up..." She smiles and closes her eyes.

It's time to go.

@thesiblingsoftheblackandwhite

[tophatwearingidiot]

TRAP AND DEVOUR.

A small Smg4 BREAK THE CYCLE!AU writing for the sillies. A bit rusty on my writing but I think I did well.

AU by: Me (tophatwearingidiot) and @bear-boi-5 Cover art by: @bear-boi-5 Writing by: Me (tophatwearingidiot)

TW/CW: CANNIBLISM, DEATH, VOILENCE, BLOOD AND GORE.

Enjoy reading.

It was dark. The moon shone onto the soft western sand, making it glitter faintly in its light, a noticeable chill in the air. It was quite cold during the nights in this hell hole of a simulation, it felt all too realistic to Saiko. She was walking along the dunes, she came here to do something, something very important. Confronting Meggy. She'd been acting so fucking weird lately, like some crazed person, her ramblings and speech weird, and she had been quite distant, only getting worse each day that passed by. At the same time, Shroomy had gone missing, and it was… unnerving. No one has heard a peep from him in days, he hasn't stopped by with more potatoes, none of his associates: Belle, Whimpu, Jeeves, or anyone else in his group had seen him either. He seemingly just… vanished. She was hoping Meggy may have some insight since she's a bit further out than everyone else… if Meggy didn't know anything she'd try asking Tari to since she's been with Meggy the whole time. She hoped it would give even just a tiny bit of insight, everyone was worried, especially Karen, quite close they are, and she's been worried sick, Saiko just wanted some proof that the mushroom man was ok.

Saiko looked at the rickety, old, lone building… standing in front of it nervously- it smelt kinda fucking bad… she walked up to the door and knocked lightly, the door slowly creaked open, Meggy staring at her with an intense burn of a stare at Saiko. "Meggy." Saiko said softly… "We need to talk." "Oh Saiko! I-It's just you… uhmmm… sure what is it you need to talk about!" Meggy said in a fast-paced manner, opening up the door more, her eyes looking a bit sleepless, hair tangled up and ratty. Saiko started to talk again "Not sure if you're aware but Shroomy's been missing for a bit you uh… seen him?" "Oh nooo… sorry I haven't." Meggy smiled, a bit weirdly. "You haven't seen him at all?" "Nope… not for a couple days, Karen's worried sick…" Saiko said, a bit sadly… Meggy looked to the side a bit- her smile weaking to a nervous one before turning back into a broader one… and crazed-ish. "Why don't you uhm- come in Sai. I haven't chatted with you in a bit, heh." Saiko thought about it… she felt uneasy but, Meggy wouldn't hurt her? Their gf's… with Tari too… it's worth it right? She needed the comfort of them anyway. "Uh yeah sure. Is Tari still with you?" Meggy looked at her and nodded. Saiko felt a bit better…

She stepped inside the house and looked around, it was pretty banged up, but Meggy and Tari seemed to be making it work. Still have no clue why they moved out here though. She walked through the house with Meggy and into what seemed to be a living room. Tari sat on the ripped-up couch just staring blankly, she looked sort of drained- made Saiko slightly worried. Tari looked over and looked a bit nervous for a second before smiling… "Oh Sai… nice to see you…" She said softly. Saiko smiled back and hugged her, she planted a small kiss on her gf's cheek and smiled again, Tari blushing softly. "What are you doing here anyway Sai…" Saiko was about to speak when Meggy answered for her- "Shroomy has apparently gone missing… she wanted to know if you had any insight…" Her voice seemed a bit strained… Tari looked at Saiko and answered quickly, "U-Uhm no, not at all…" her voice seemed nervous, Meggy soon widely smiled and looked at Tari with a stare that could pierce rock. "Tari, you look a bit drained. Why don't you go ahead and go get something to eat. Hm?" Tari got more nervous "Uh- no I think I'm fi-" "Tari. I insist." She interrupted, tone a bit stern. "But I… alright…" Tari got up and walked to the kitchen, opening the door a waft of a rotten smell burst through for only a second, causing Saiko to gag. "Oh sorry… we haven't been able to clean out the kitchen yet, ignore the smell." She said with a softer smile… but it felt fake. Meggy spoke up once more… "Why don't we go for a walk on the dunes? Just me and you, hm?" "Why just us…?" Saiko asked… "Why not? We need to catch up, don't we?" She said… Saiko paused for a second and then replied, "Alright then, should we tell Tar?" "No need. She's an adult, we don't need to say anything. Now let's get out there before it gets too cold hm?" With that the two walked outside.

They talked a little about what had been happening recently in each other's lives, a little bit of laughing, a little bit of sorrow… but it felt nice to Saiko. While they were walking among the dunes, she noticed something. A green and golden hat sitting alone in the sand.

Shroomy's hat.

She paused, Meggy looked over at the hat and then directed her gaze at Saiko, who was already running towards it. She picked up the hat and inspected it, it looked damaged. She looked around a bit and saw something… horrifying. Not too far from the hat was Shroomy. A bullet shot through his head and his body picked apart by animals, what you could only assume to be vultures. She felt a presence right behind her, Meggy who was staring at her blankly. "He needed to go ya know." She said… her voice null of emotion. Saiko's eyes widened "You… YOU FUCKING DID THIS!? MEGGY WHAT IN GOD'S NAME IS WRONG WITH YOU." She screamed angrily. Meggy just… stared… "He's a traitor." "THE HELL YOU MEAN" Saiko shouted back quickly before getting met back with a quickly spoken, angry response, "HE IS A TRAITOR. WREN'S LITTLE FUCKIN SPY. SO, I GOT RID OF HIM." "Spy…? Sp.. SPY!? ARE YOU DENSE. HE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG. YOU RAT BASTAR-" She was cut off being tackled to the ground, Meggy pinning her down tightly. "YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND SAI. WITH THAT… ABOMINATION THAT IS HIS OTHER SIDE HE WOULD HAVE TAKEN THE OFFER. AND HE DID. SO, HE MUST BE TAKEN CARE OF. I DON'T LIKE THE FACT OF YOUR DENIAL SAIKO BICHITARU." She growled… her voiced crazed and rabid. Saiko struggled, but Meggy dug her hands into her arms more causing a yelp from Saiko… Meggy paused… hearing a small rumble come from her stomach… she smiled sadistically… "You know. I've been a bit… low on food. Been given most of it to Tar but… now that I know you're no better than that Shroom… maybe I'll just have a bite." Saiko looked in pain and in confusion for a second before it turned into a small scream, Meggy bit her leg, and started to dig her pointed teeth in… she quickly began to rip her bottom half up, Saiko screamed loudly in pain, crying out for any help, her screams piercing the air like a knife to butter, but it did not pierce anyone's ears. Her legs were torn up brutally, Meggy swallowing each chunk of flesh like a wild animal, eventually getting down to bone… which she tore from Saiko's body, a loud crack being heard as Saiko screamed more, Meggy continuing to eat… Saiko's voice became shrill as her throat hurt from her screaming… crying buckets of tears… the world started to get darker yet darker as she bled out. She felt so betrayed, so angry as the last bits of her life finally gave out, the last thing she saw was Meggy face… still tearing into the last bits of flesh on her detached leg bones.

END. THANK YOU FOR READING.

[m1d-45]

my take on sagau lore / logistics

summary: sagau lore! includes you the creator, self-awareness, khaenri’ah, celestia, literally everything i could think of

word count: ~4.1k

-> warnings: spoilers for literally everything bar the sumeru archon quests. khaenri’ah lore, kaeya + albedo lore, celestia lore, archon quests, all of it. i ramble and stray off topic and swear while doing so.

-> lowercase intended. forgive the format pls

taglist: @samarill || @thenyxsky || @valeriele3 || @shizunxie

< masterlist >

ok, so, just off the top of it, let’s address the largest problem with this au, specifically my genre of it:

how can teyvat be real if it’s a game?

great question! the answer is that it’s both.

i haven’t thought this through entirely, only enough that i personally can suspend my disbelief about the fics i read, but the way i see it is that you, the creator, made teyvat a billion (or more idk) years ago. you made the people—or the animals, if you still wanna subscribe to evolution—the lands, the waters and the mountains. everything was carefully pulled and molded by your hands, your influence stretching to how the wind blew.

(that’s because the god who controls it wants your attention so badly but whoooo that’s cultish territory)

anyway. fast-track past the archon war, yeah? after that was sorted, you began to hand out visions, personally at first before assigning celestia to do so. there were simply too many people, and you could not judge them all. it would not be fair.

so you didn’t.

but i’d be lying if the archon war didn’t take a toll on you. you’d been influencing it from the sidelines, carefully making sure as few innocents were harmed as possible, trying to keep the terrain intact. you were technically fighting, but on the side of teyvat itself.

(it loved you for it. every blade of grass and leaf on a stem sung your praises.)

micromanaging like that, across an entire planet, let alone trying to simultaneously set up the constellations you wanted for vision holders… you’re exhausted.

now, you could, in theory, just burrow down into the heart of the earth and rest, but that felt… impersonal, almost. you still wished to look after your world, you just wanted to have a little less responsibility while you did so.

so you left the planet, momentarily, leaving that entire universe behind, and made another. it was, admittedly, not your best work, worse than even the rest planets you tried before teyvat, but you were tired. you half-heartedly scattered some resources, salted the water, and placed the beginnings of life. with a final goodbye to celestia, you allowed your soul to rest in the core of this new planet you called ‘earth.’

now, you weren’t just going to sit there, no. as the people above lived, oblivious to the god resting in the molten core, your subconscious pulled some strings. not enough to influence wars—so many wars, so much cruelty and bloodshed—or any major occurrences, but enough to shift some small details around. these people would start a company. this game would be launched. and when you, your soul, had finally recovered from the ordeal of managing a whole planet, a child would be born.

you knew mortal minds had a hard time conceptualizing the divine, let alone dealing with the knowledge that they were one, so you made the executive decision to remove your memory. call it a product of your pity, but you decided you’d live a human life here before returning to teyvat. the world’s time difference shouldn’t make it that much longer for your lovely followers, only about a year or so, so it would be fine. you set up some dominoes, then allowed yourself to be mortal when they fell.

bad call. turns out you shouldn’t try and fudge space-time when you’re overworked and burnt out. the time dilation ended up being reversed, meaning an average life of 80 years was 4,800 years for your followers.

still, not all was lost! you, human, came into contact with a device, came into contact with advertisements from a company you, god, had a heavy hand in. the world you had loved carefully recreated, admittedly with far less detail and nuance, but what could you expect of the technology at the time?

as you downloaded the game, a final domino fell into place. the traces of divinity in your blood bled into your machine, turning the screen from a screen, and into a portal.

billions of billions of light years away, exiting this universe and entering another, two twins approached your world. they had witnessed you build it all but frowned at your lack of presence. their world, one of many that you had also crafted, still was visited by you from time to time, but this... where had you gone? were your people okay?

they approached, only to be stopped by one of celestia’s guards. boiling red cubes stung the air, lashing at their sides as she—the sustainer, she said—fought. the two drew back, sharing a look, and when they dove-

your light filled the air, time seeming to slow to a crawl. your chosen traveller sucked in a breath, feeling the familiar aura envelop them. even as their twin was swallowed, as their stomach opened into a pit and their heart crumbled, as gravity took hold of their suddenly much weaker form, you were there.

and so your journey in teyvat began once more, this time not as the creator, but as the creation.

that’s the basic lore down. yes, i know ‘basic’ took nearly 1k words on its own, but oh well. anyway, now onto some other details outside of that, such as….

the raiden shogun!

the visions were signs of your favor—not that the comman man knew that, but the gods did—so why would she ever confiscate them? simple; after you had started giving out visions, you had first passed the duty to celestia, and then… left. it’s reasonable, in her mind, that the visions were sapping at your energy, keeping you away even longer. she hoped, in a twisted sort of desire, that she could hasten your return. celestia had tried to stop her, stopping giving out electro visions, but it wasn’t enough. other visions were still in her lands, and she needed to remove them. if only on her isle of eternity, anything harming you would not be allowed.

the tsaritsa!

ok, i admit, i’m not sure how much of what i’m about to say is canon. i watch too much game theory to be 100% sure that this is Actual Lore, but… whatever. so the tsaritsa is collecting all these gnoses, right? the gods’ connection to celestia? just… kinda taking them, collecting these connections, weakening celestia so she can take it down. her reasoning is very similar to ei’s, in that you created celestia and imbued it with some of your power. however, you must have accidentally given too much, wanting them to thrive, and had weakened yourself. so, she figures, by taking down celestia, she can restore you your strength!

but wait, you ask, why not do a vision hunt decree like the shogun? simple! you gave out visions before you involved celestia, so they clearly aren’t the problem. besides, she thinks there’s a lovely poetic quality to taking down celestia with soldiers bearing weapons they awarded.

delusions!

it’s people sabotaging their health to pretend their strength is god-given, not much changes in this au. there’s implications between it and the tsaritsa’s motives for gnosis-hunting—notably if she’s taking down celestia because your strength was drained, why drain the strength of her people—but that’s ~not my problem~

morax?

morax!!! silly boy. anyway, he doesn’t see any problem with stepped down as an archon, if that’s your worry. after all, you yourself left, letting the people run themself, so…. surely he could—should, even—do the same. he feels maybe a bit bad about leaving liyue without anything, but soothes himself knowing they don’t know you’re gone. most mortals don’t, really. but in a similar vein…

venti!

venti feels the same way. if anything, his conviction is even stronger. you left your people—not entirely, admittedly, but still, you did—so he should be able to as well. he knew you had left celestia in your wake, but he had left the knights! and surely, to be overly-controlling was worse, right? you had allowed decarabian to fall, so you must not want dictators(a good thing, as he doesn’t know how he’d handle you going against one of his most core virtues).

celestia!

for the sake of the au, celestia will be kinda proxy rulers of teyvat. i know there’s probably some lore out there suggesting otherwise, likely something in the 3.2-3.3 archon quests, but i haven’t done those and so it can’t be held against me. anyway, you’re tired after the war right? so you decide, as plan A, to create celestia as a council of proxy rulers, to enact your ideals—the heavenly principles—and take care of things. this goes south, because the act of creating celestia drains even more of your strength, and you really hadn’t taken a break since you started creating teyvat so maybe it’s time to pick up plan B off the back burner…

(in celestia’s opinion, burrowing into the earth should have been plan B. taking a nap in a gilded palace should have been plan C. leaving the planet entirely was the nuclear option.)

paimon!

OOOOHHHHH BOYYYYY the emotions i have about this little fairy aidjwrkfkkds

anyway. the way i see it, she’s a manifestation of the remaining divine energy in your body/teyvat. pick your favorite, the end result is the same: she’s attached to your traveller, to you, your device. she can vaguely sense the buttons you have—which is why the tutorial changes across platforms—and loves whenever you open the paimon menu, because she can bask in your light all the more. off camera, her and the traveller gush about you. canon, i said so.

anyway, she’s the one that gives us the ability to time travel so the way i see it, she has to be at least a little divine, or be able to wield power of that strength.

take a shot every time i say strength this fic

i have some feelings about the time mechanic, most notably that it’s likely an alteration of the (very scuffed) time dilation system you implemented, but i’m writing this during school hours and can’t really be bothered with trying to rationalize that. for now, just know that Its a Thing That Exists.

co-op!

if we’re operating under the ideal that your game is the only one self-aware, then how does co-op work?

um… it doesn’t—

ok ok ok uh there’s two interpretations you can go with, of which i don’t have a favorite:

Option 1: when you go to co-op, your (self-aware) characters are transported into the digital world of your companion. they’re confused, because everything seems flat and empty of detail and there’s these weird bars above enemies and HOLY SHIT IS THAT ME???

they eventually gather that this is a false recreation of teyvat, one run by another person. whether or not they can see the chat is up to you. umm regarding farming and stuff: that means tackling the inventory, which… i’ll talk about that later, i swear-

Option 2: when you enter co-op, you leave teyvat. your vessels go back to their places—again, i’ll touch on that later, promise—and your aura leaves. paimon’s the only constant, but that’s mostly because she follows you or the traveller at all times (if you don’t have your traveller on your team… wait a few paragraphs pls). she is fascinated by the digital world, more so of the replicas of your vessels within it. maybe she tells the traveller of it when they have time.

they’re kinda similar, boiling down to whether or not you want your vessels to have a cosmic-horror level freak out at the fact that that’s them. i don’t have a favorite, and usually kinda fluctuate between the two whenever it’s convenient.

the inventory!

the inventory!!! arguably the most convenient system in teyvat, of which my answer is wildly inconvenient.

the basic principle of it is that it’s a pocket dimension, much like the one paimon vanishes into. it’s a very cool pocket dimension, with a menu and filtration systems, but that’s all it is. it preserves the quality of food, it keeps things from burning each other(i. e. mist flower corollas and flaming flower stamens are right next to each other, yet the quality of both never dwindles), and generally keeps things frozen in a sort of stasis. i like to think that vessels with a good sense of detail can pick up on an odd taste/texture to the food if it’s been in there a while, with the effect lessening as the food quality(suspicious → delicious scale) and level (stars) increases, but it really doesnt impact anything all that much.

regarding co-op: this is where things get blurry. if the inventory is a pocket dimension, and co-op is fake…. the best option is to, once more, chalk it up to divinity. whether yours, as you pick them from the digital world, of the remains of your aura in teyvat, when you return.

(another option that doesn’t work as well is thinking of the inventory as a tally, as in there’s a number of items you have and when you access it the number goes down and it summons / creates the item. the number is a representation of the power stored for that specific item- kinda like the omni-ubiquity nets, i guess? anyway, this is kinda pushing things, and though i don’t prefer it, it definitely can be useful to think about in some situations, such as an imposter au where you(reader) can draw energy from the inventory via sacrificing food or supplies. that’s really cool actually wtf-)

KHAENRI’AH HOW COULD I FORGET KHAEN-

so. khaenri’ah.

….i don’t know a lot about the lore of khaenri’ah.

[one wiki check and a lot of deleted ranting later]

khaenri’ah was a godless nation. it didn’t have a god ruling over it, it didn’t have a god influencing or building it, it didn’t have a - oh my god khaenri’ah is the nation of hubristic greed.

sorry i had a revelation mid-sentence there: to clarify, khaenri’ah was built entirely by people. they may (read: did) worship a god, you, but refused to allow you to meddle with their nation. that was their creation. you could have all of teyvat—and they would give you some of their crops to try and satisfy you—but you could not have their nation. they lived underground, away from your holy light and the overbearing gaze of celestia, and in the dark of a cave with only the earth as their witness, they began to learn khemia. they began to learn how to create, how to mimic your power. theirs was more transmutation, less pure creation, but it was so close to it that rhinedottir let it get to her head. she started her program, created durin and [REDACTED]- sorry, subject two (have i mentioned how much i hate he doesn’t have a name? fucked up fr fr). eventually, finally, after many tests and trials and rifthounds, with abyssal magic beginning to stain her hands, she created synthetic life.

the port on its neck sealed into a shimmering star, crystal blue eyes fluttering open, chalk ribs expanding as it took a breath. gold watched with rapt attention, pen falling from her hand.

she’d done it.

high on joy, she kept going, neglecting her new creation, herself, neglecting even basic safety, and eventually, she had toppled the pride of man.

khaenri’ah fell.

this allows for khaenri’ans such as dainslef, albedo, and kaeya to all know of and worship you—important, since kaeya is a character we’re automatically given—while still being bitter and jaded over khaenri’ah. this keeps as much of the lore in-game as intact as possible, with the only big difference being that khaenri’ah dedicated itself to you, but it would not be influenced by you. it was toppled by its own hubris, its desire to be divine without ever worshipping the god that made them too much for mortal men to handle. they don’t hate you, and in fact the fall of their nation has made it clear that they should have respected you more. they don’t blame you for it, as it was their own desire that brought them down, but they are a little more aware of the power of a god.

FAQ!!

i don’t have the traveller on my team, how does that work lore-wise?

excellent question! i…. don’t really know—

the way i see it, this is mostly a problem attached to the concept of ‘parties’ in the first place(again, please put a pin in the idea, we’re almost there). paimon is always with us, but the traveller… since they don’t have ‘a place to be’ as with your other vessels, as you were with them from the start… you could say that they’re always with you. silently watching from the realm of stars just outside of reality, watching you level your characters and give them strength. they wish you could pay more attention to them, but they know that teyvat is your prize creation, the people within it your most beloved. while you had encouraged them and their sibling to traverse your other worlds, it made sense that you’d want to empower these people first. your choices were.. odd, but you seemed happy, mostly, so they were too. ultimately, they are just another of your creations, and they want you to be happy just as the others do.

what happens when the game closes?

this connects to both the party system and the ‘realm of stars’ i mentioned in the traveller’s section. now, the personal belief i subscribe to is that it’s… another pocket dimension sorry—

akcnkwdjdkd ok so you know in the character menu how the background is all hazy and star-like and tinted the color of their element? i think the hydro’s have bubbles floating around but i have just spent too much time in enkanomiya-

anyway, that’s a ✨separate dimension✨. i imagine its like a line, where your characters are arranged like the bar on the side (top if you’re a pc gamer). characters can look over if they wish, though that’s dependent on some other factors (i know this is already long but i’ll elaborate on this later). the poses for weapons, artifacts, etc. are all forced on them, like strings on a puppet—war flashbacks for my scaramouche. they’re tugged into place, and stay like that. your mains are used to you fussing about with their artifacts, and have learned to simply rest into the feeling. why shouldn’t they, after all?

ANYWAY this is getting long. so when you’re in the field, your characters fall away save your party members, who move to the odd starry landscape of the party menu. there’s a large screen, which allows them to see like it’s your screen, almost. there’s a health bar, they can see the energy, and though that’s about it the important bit is that they can still see the character on field and the battle around them. this way they know what to expect, and where to aim, where to brace for an impact because sorry, they have the most hp and you need to tank this hit. when the game closes, you swap team members, etc. they are transported back to where they were prior to being on your team. now, for those you don’t utilize as often, they aren’t fully pulled into the character menu, as this would cause complications, but they are vaguely aware of when you open it. this way they can prepare in the rare case you switch to them for whatever reason.

additionally, when you shut down genshin, the traveller takes your characters’ place. they hold your place, often using the time to catch up with paimon and eat, both talking about their separate perspectives on your battle. paimon from the outside, watching the vessels switch in a shower of gold sparks, and the traveller from the inside, watching them lean on each other when their health was low and swap encouraging phrases during a tough fight. the traveller can’t really move all that much, but they don’t have to stay very still—what’s the chance you’ll notice they’re facing the wrong direction anyway?—which is good since they may have to defend themself against any enemies wandering in. if they’re off your team and unbuilt, it’s a little difficult, but between their status as an outlander and paimon’s influence, it’s not that big of a hassle.

(sorry this one’s real long but this is the concept i spent the most time developing. i have a very very long albedo fic where this mechanic is center stage so i have a lot of junk stored in my mind abt it)

what about friendship levels?

friendship levels!!! in-game they’re a metric of how long/much a character is with you, and it’s the same in sagau. the higher a character’s friendship, the more of your aura they emit by proxy, since they’re… in the absolute kindest way possible, you know how shoes have to be broken in -? yeah—

the harsh tugs of your device commanding them to move softens into a gentle guide, but they’re so in-tune with your playstyle that they go ahead of the strings, attacking slightly quicker. a high-friendship team has synergy like no other, the characters swapping just before you actually press the button to do so, their elemental reactions booming brighter, skills and bursts doing that much more damage just because they know what their doing by heart. they’re certain they could replicate it even without you, though they’d never dare, and your main sometimes finds themself repeating your usual rotation in their head to help them. swap, skill, swap, skill, burst, they mutter, their fingers tapping along where the buttons would be as they try to puzzle something out. swap, skill, swap, passive, swap, the familiar routine providing comfort.

how does the concept of being “self-aware” work?

lovely question.

…

it doesn’t.

jsksskdjd i feel like a software developer— ANYWAY-

google defines self-aware as “having conscious knowledge of one's own character and feelings”, which isn’t (inherently) the case. in relation to video games, it’s usually something along the lines of “this game is aware it’s a game” which doesn’t work since, as we’ve established, teyvat isn’t a game.

in this case, being self-aware means recognizing that you are operating through a device. it means knowing that you are not controlling them directly, that you instead use a proxy. it means, for characters like albedo, recognizing the sticky binds of code that limit his movements, it means registering that you are still far, far away, and that you only feel this close because of your device. it means, for some such as, say, diluc, there wasn’t a reason why kaeya was a vessel before him. it means knowing that their god is still lost, and knowing that they have to ensure you come back safely.

and that’s about it! discarding some icky topics such as the semantics of an isekai (which boils down to tapping into the divinity stored in your device so it doesn’t really matter much either way) and the abyss (which i don’t know enough about lore-wise, sorry) that’s everything i keep in mind when i write my genshin impact self-aware works!

if you have any further questions, feel free to either reply or send in an ask, or check out my masterlist if you want to see these concepts in practice.

have a good one!

[itsascreambaby96]

Laughing is the best medicine

Summary: Chad helps you when you are anxious

Fluff with a little bit of Angst

No use of Y/N

🩷Feedback would be much appreciated🩷

To say you were stressed was an understatement. Your anxiety was off the charts. College was a challenge in itself. Having struggles financially too made everything ten times worse. You weren't exactly rich so you had a job to help you get money. Now what to do when you get fired? Why they let you go, you had no idea. But here you were. You had no idea how to pay rent now nor your college fees.

A knock on the door pulled you out of your thoughts. You stopped your pacing to open it. In front of you stood your boyfriend Chad, a slightly worried look on his face.

"Babe, where the hell have you been? You haven't answered any calls or texts from anyone. You know you can't do that to me."

He let himself in and you closed the door. You turned around to face him. There he stood, hands on his hip giving you a pointed look. You let out a deep sigh, letting out a breathy, barely audible apology. Chad immediately deflated upon seeing your solemn look.

"Are you alright?"

He was in front of you now, both hands holding your face. His brown eyes, that you always loved because they always show his emotions so well, were full of concern. You didn't want to bother him with your problems but you couldn't hold it in anymore. Tears were welling in your eyes and were soon cascading down your face. Your arms flew around Chad's neck, your face buried in his hoodie, muffling your sobs. Chad grew even more worried now, holding you close to him.

"Hey hey hey what's wrong? Are you hurt?" Carefully he manoeuvred you two to your sofa, sitting down with you in his lap. Still holding you close he softly rubbed your back.

"It's alright babe, just breathe ok? Can you do that for me?"

He could feel you nodding slightly against his chest.

"Good. Just concentrate on my breathing and go along with it, yeah? That's right in and out. In and out. You are doing so well."

You tried copying his breathing slowly, calming down, but still not able to stop your tears. Chad could feel you calming down after a while, he softly lifted your head off of his chest. Your eyes were puffy and you were sure you looked awful, but Chad looked at you like he's never seen anyone more beautiful. He softly wiped away your tears with his thumb, a soft smile adorning his features.

"Are you ready to tell me what's wrong?"

You nodded. With a shaky breath you began to talk.

"I lost my job. And now I don't know how to pay rent or the college fees, and then I have to drop out and get a job that I don't want for the rest of my life and live in a shitty apartment. And I will never achieve my dreams. And then you will leave me too because what would you want with someone like me, you will get a smart and popular girl who is successful."

You were rambling, your breathing became heavier again. Chad's hands were back at your cheeks again making you look at him and stop talking.

"Hey hey hey, calm down. None of that. First of all, I would never ever leave you. Heck I would still love you even if you, I don't know, had to become a hitman or something."

That made you chuckle softly. Chad smiled at that.

"Secondly, there is still time to get enough money for the fee. No need to stress about that now. Now for rent, if you can't pay rent you just have to live with me."

He had a proud smile on his face from his, apparently brilliant, idea.

"Chad, you live in a dorm with another person already, and you only have a small bed."

Chad just shrugged.

"We could make it work, I am very sure of that. Besides Ethan likes you, I am sure he would be fine with you living with us. Especially cause you already always clean up when you are over. You are over a lot you know."

You slapped his chest slightly, giggling.

"You are the worst."

"And you love me anyways. So that says more about you than me."

He grinned as you rolled your eyes at him and turned your head away smiling. He softly turned your head back towards him. "There is my beautiful girl."

He gave your nose a soft peck, making your cheeks heat up a little.

"My point is, no matter what happens, there is always a way, ok? I won't just abandon you suddenly. We will get through this together ok?"

You nodded, without much enthusiasm. Chad was not having any of that, poking your sides, making you flinch and giggle.

"I said: Ok?"

You rolled your eyes smiling at him.

"Ok!" He liked that answer enough and gave you a kiss.

"I love you, you know? I don't know what I would do without." You cuddled close to him.

"Dunno probably sell foot pics or something." His chuckle vibrated through his chest.

"Not the worst idea you ever had."

"I kno- wait what?"

You laughed at that.

"Oh you think you are so funny don't ya?"

"Yes, quite frankly I do." You grinned.

The grin Chad gave you is full of mischief. In seconds you were pinned to the sofa with Chad tickling you mercilessly. Your laugh could be heard throughout the whole apartment. You were begging him to stop.

"What are the magic words?"

You could barely breathe, let alone get any words out. "Pl-please!"

"Oh babe, you should know that those aren't the magic words I am looking for."

He wasn't letting up. You were sure you were going to pee yourself.

"Chad mercy please!"

Your voice was squeaky and breathless. Lucky for you, your boyfriend wasn't cruel and so he stopped, still laughing. You were giggling and trying to breathe in as much air as you could.

"I nearly peed myself."

That made Chad almost double over with laughter. His laugh has always been infectious, so you joined in on it.

After a couple of minutes the two of you calmed down, grinning at each other with a look that could only be described as totally in love.

"You know the magic words I've been looking for were 'My boyfriend is the most handsome and the strongest man I have ever seen.' Just so you know next time." He even tried to imitate your voice.

"Ok first of all I do not sound like that!"

"You totally do!" He was grinning from ear to ear.

You rolled your eyes playfully.

"Secondly. I will, when I see him."

"Oh you little minx!" He was on you again, tickling you without mercy. You were squealing and laughing full heartedly.

[vaultlinkvt]

This is the first proper thing I've drawn in ages (and first are I think I've posted in over 5 years?) I just needed to draw the opening to Act 5 and my reaction to it.

Nothing has gripped me in such a way and forced me to finish an art piece like this in so fucking long. I see far too much of myself in him. I just want them to be ok after this is all over. STARS, this is just Asriel all over again isn't it. But WORSE!/pos

…I guess that could make this vent adjacent? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I also made a shitpost edit that I posted separately here.

There are so many things covered by each other and I just need to share and talk about them. Bonus details and rambles under the cut.

Siffrin's expression was like the first thing I drew and if it didn't turn out as good as it did I probably wouldn't have spent almost 10 days slowly adding to this and I just need to show it because his hands/arms end up covering most of their face.

Nothing much else to say about him, I'm just super happy with how everything about him turned out (I did have to go back and redraw some of his hair towards the end because the line thickness wasn't consistent with everything I drew after.

Next is ME yippeeeee. I have no idea why I spent so long adding details even tho I knew alot of it would get covered by Sif 'cause of how I was posing this.

I even designed a little button based on the Change Ornament + Star (the Change Belief and Lost Belief in The Universe really spoke to me in so many ways)

The gloves are an Archery Glove on the right hand and a Drawing/Writing Glove on the left.

The cloak is based on the style of cloak my mom made for my family for SCA events when I was young. It's just a simple hooded cloak but it has a slit in each side so you can stick your hands threw without needing to open up the cloak. I imagine it being stylized like, the opening doesn't exist until you stick your hands threw and then it can just freely glide around the face of the cloak to wherever it's needed, stopping at the elbow only letting threw the forearm, below the slit beginning to hang off the elbow with gravity while the part above begins to move with the upper arm.

I didn't even try to draw the outfit under the cloak because dealing with the folds of a thick wool cloak was enough for me (you can see how I gave up at the knees because I KNEW Sif was gonna cover them up). What I imagine the outfit being is this big baggy tunic and pants that are tied down at the forearms/calves to keep from getting in the way, it's also supposed to have a big baggy turtleneck thing that can be pulled up as a(nother) hood (iirc, this sorta thing was used so someone could wear a chainmail hood without it grabbing your hair(there ware also like stand alone cloth hoods that did the same thing too but eh, my memory is bad I might just be misremembering this)) but I couldn't figure out the folds and ended up just doing a simple button up thing (which then got covered by Sif's big head anyway.)

I spent soooo long trying to draw my eyes, trying to figure out the shape, and ended up just doing a bunch of small tests to the side before finding one that actually looked right. Drag it over the face and see that it fit EXACTLY, didn't even need to redraw it or anything.... unless you're talking about the other eye in which case I just duplicated it, flipped, and did some perspective warping until it looked ok because I could NOT draw that again especially at a different perspective (can I just say I have no idea how I drew that creepy eye but I love it, it was the first eye I drew and I just threw 4 lines down what the fuck how. Also the Mira-ish one looks cute too but didn't fit the expression.) I also needed to figure out what the hell was wrong with the expression I had before so you get 2 faces from me figuring that out (turns out I had the eyebrows facing the wrong way.)

I ALMOST FUCKING FORGOT MY FRECKLES TOO AAAAAAAAA (they're actually missing from the version I posted in the official ISaT server.) It was super weird trying to add them at the obscenely low resolution I was drawing at and they're probably gonna get compressed to hell and back but I think they're cute.

final thing.

Why is my hair so similar to Sif's but longer? Like, you can see I was sketching over my drawing of him to make sure I'd keep the proportions right when I started working on myself but in the process I realized that I was basically drawing over his hair but longer for mine (drawing I was using as ref here made by @leemak)

Add that to the uncomfortably long list of things I have in common with Siffrin I guess.

[awkwardgtace]

What If They Met Later?

Hey hey more Melody and Kyrie in the guardian au! This would be what I finally wrote for the ask from @smolcomfycat

Kyrie and Melody didn't meet before he became a guardian. Their paths changed in different ways. So how does it go if they meet now instead? Will Melody still be calm or would Kyrie's size scare her now?

What If They Met Later?

After becoming a guardian Kyrie’s life changed. He’d had plenty of friends before, but the medicine being too painful for him had left him alone. Not many people enjoyed the company of guardians, let alone the tallest Colossus class in years. It was something he’d reluctantly accepted. His parents, other guardians, a lot of people weren’t happy to be around someone like him.

His confidence got worse as the new technicians in his department kept leaving. The government told him this job would make people realize he wasn’t a threat. Instead it made humans see him as more dangerous, especially the ones that worked in the office. From the phone calls Byssal took; each human got scared of Kyrie for carrying in another guardian. He wasn’t going to let it happen with the next one.

That brought him to this morning. He’d tried to get to work early, the new technicians usually did better seeing him before meeting him. If he walked in during their tour the human showing them everything would ensure they met. The technician who met him like that was the quickest to leave.

It was a pain to stay still. He’d rather be outside. The early mornings were the times people would actually stand near him. A natural heat source. He knew it didn’t get rid of the fear the others felt, but he could pretend. He found himself lingering near bus stops and coffee shops while the air was cold. It was nice to think he fit in still.

He sighed just as the normal sized elevator dinged. Easiest way to get a human to the top of a desk. He turned to try and see the new person. At least he could hope they wouldn’t immediately hate him.

“It looks like Kyrie is here already,” the official announced. He never knew if they remembered he could hear or not. It wasn’t the same one each time. “You two will run into each other soon enough.”

The tension in his body died out immediately. A few times the official brought the new technician to meet him even if he arrived early. He froze up each time. There wasn’t a clear way to know how to react. If he should hold out a finger for a handshake, wave, or not move at all. If speaking would be too much for them. He wished he could take the medication to be the size of a normal human. They’d see past his size if he could…

“Your set-up is just over here in the back. Away from any guardians the others bring in. The other one assigned here is named Byssal, he should be in sometime this afternoon. Doing rounds out in the city most likely.”

The technician hadn’t spoken yet. The other ones all rambled with nerves. He couldn’t imagine how terrified this one was. Unable to even speak. He jumped when a small bell jingled.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I’m getting called back early. Will you be ok on your own?”

“I should be,” the new technician’s voice was… sweet. It was the first time he could remember wanting to see the owner of a voice so badly. “I’m just running diagnostics today anyway.”

“Great, feel free to call if you need anything. I’ll check in with you at the end of the week. By the way…” They spoke too quietly for him to hear. He could only assume it was that it was some promise the new technician could be transferred if there were any issues. Another jingle. “Ok, so long!”

Kyrie held his breath once the elevator dinged signally the guide was gone. There was no telling how this technician would act. A few talked about how they hated the assignment, others came to look at him, at least one left because Kyrie stood. All he got was silence. It was just him and the new technician. As much as he knew it was a bad idea, he wanted to go see her. Her voice was different… calm and sweet. All the others were nervous, a squeak at least as they spoke. This woman was so kind. He turned back to the papers on his desk, reading those would help distract him a bit at least…

The silence was excruciating. He thought the new person would say something. Play music, make noise while setting up. It was just eerily quiet. It was almost enough for him to think he imagined her arriving this morning. He started to flex his fingers, worried tapping on the desk would make the new person scared, but he was nervous. After a few more minutes he knew he had to move. He climbed to his feet, the plan to get some water from their kitchen. He’d taken one step when a strange music played from the technician’s area.

“Hey Cap,” he could hear her voice better now. Maybe from the sudden silence of the music. He wanted to see her. “Yeah, one of them is here.”

Kyrie couldn’t help himself, inching forward to where he could see the technician. He tried to keep his feet on the ground so she wouldn’t notice. Too much was in the way for him to get a glimpse.

“No, I haven't met them yet.” Pause. Shuffle. Wait. “It’s the bigger one that’s here right now.”

He took a step. She didn’t seem to react. Another and another. Finally he could see the small spot their new technician would be most days. She was behind something. It was all the more tempting to walk up and talk to her. He was tired of scared humans though. 

Then she laughed. It was loud and contagious. A smile wound up on his face. It was hard not to chuckle a bit or let his curiosity follow to learn why. His body froze when he tried to take a step. Something in her voice made him afraid to scare her.

“Cap I don’t know why you think they’d hurt me. Guardians are still human,” her laughter died out. Kyrie stood up straighter, fully turned towards the technician’s area. She called him human… “Please, I know what I’m doing. They picked me for a reason. Just stop panicking.”

Others were worried. His hands curled into fists. That made sense. She was the only human working here. She’d be alone with him and Byssal and any guardian they had to control. It would never be simple for her here. His curiosity and interest were already wrong, it would be better to just walk off and avoid her. Avoid the voice that sounded like a song to him. The laugh that stunned him.

“I’ll talk to them later. Maybe when the other one shows up. I’m not scared, but-” She walked out to a spot where he could see her. She met his eyes immediately. She was beautiful. “Holy shit his eyes are so fucking blue.”

A hundred things ran through his head. Were his eyes being blue a good thing? How could he talk to her? Would she be afraid? Would she only talk if he were human sized? If she’d let him hold her? Sound reached him again, he tilted his head a bit. He was too focused on her. He wanted to know everything about her. He needed to know her name. 

“You can hear me?” she said. Kyrie blindly nodded. Immediately she disappeared behind her equipment. He had no idea of how to react to it; if he should follow to talk or leave her alone. Nodding had been a mistake. It would have been better to act like he didn’t. She’d find out eventually though. It wasn’t hard to notice when someone like him could hear and see her so easily.

Seconds later she appeared again. Her head was down, he wanted to run. She would leave, be afraid. He’d never get to talk to her. To learn how he could make her laugh. She was the first person to make him feel like this since he became a guardian. The fear of losing this chance was liable to kill him.

The technician walked closer. Each step made him wonder if he should leave. Maybe he was too much. Maybe she thought he was mad and wanted to hurt her. She stopped just close enough she could look up at his face still. That had to be a good sign. At least he hoped it was.

She turned her head up to him. Brown eyes wide and… worried. Worried not scared. Her skin was pale, but her cheeks a rosy red. Her hair was as brown as her eyes, it looked long. Long and soft. “Y-you must be Kyrie, can we just forget about that phone call you heard. Maybe?”

Kyrie stared at her. She wore a red shirt that made her look all the more stunning. He wondered what she wore when she wasn’t working. She asked him something, even said his name. Kyrie couldn’t bring himself to talk. His voice might be too loud. The words wrong. His face stern. He could ruin this.

“I-is that a no?” She put a hand behind her head. Hugged herself with her other arm. “Look, I know I’m not supposed to be on calls. My brother gets worried. Please, can we just forget it happened?”

“Wh-at call?” his voice cracked as he spoke. She was too stunning. He still hadn’t heard her name. “I uh… Hi?”

Kyrie felt like an idiot. He’d never been lost for words like this. Yet now… now he was lucky to remember his own name. She stared at him. Silence. Then she sighed. A smile sent his way. A smile for him. Then she laughed. It calmed him immediately.

“Thanks. I guess introductions then, right?” She held her arm out. “I’m Melody, we’ll be working together for a while at least. Nice to meet you. I wasn’t wrong was I? You are Kyrie… right?”

Kyrie stared at her tiny arm. She held it out, but he knew he’d scare her. Once she realized just how big he was next to her. Despite that, despite his own heart pounding, he moved his arm. It was the first time he was glad he could only use a finger or two. If she had to grab his hand she’d notice the sweat on his palm.

Melody didn’t move… He brought his fingers closer. Eventually his finger was right next to her hand. She hadn’t moved, hadn’t even shuddered. With more care than he thought he was capable of, he grabbed her hand with his index finger and thumb. He bit his tongue as he focused on barely twitching his fingers up and down. As soon as he’d done that he froze again. Reluctant to let this end. He had to say something. Anything…

“I’m Kyrie,” he whispered. As soon as he spoke he felt like crawling in a hole. She knew who he was. She said it twice. Now he just repeated it to her.

“Glad to know I was right,” she laughed. It was awkward, but adorable. He felt lost, he didn’t want to let her walk away yet. “Can I uh, have my arm back?”

Kyrie let go immediately. Melody stumbled away. Words stuck in his throat as he watched her. It made no sense why it was hard to talk to her. Nerves were one thing, but he managed to talk to the other technicians. He managed handshakes with government officials without holding for so long. This time… he just wanted to make sure she wasn’t scared.

“I-I’ll go finish setting up then…” Melody gave an awkward wave and walked off. Kyrie watched as she did. He almost hoped she would look back, that he could try to smile. Instead she ducked behind the equipment. The equipment for him… that proved how small she was.

Kyrie forced himself to turn away. He continued his walk to the kitchen to get water. He walked slower than normal around as he did so, up until he sat back at his desk. The entire time he waited to hear her voice pipe up loud enough for him. Hours passed before he heard anything and it was just Byssal coming in for them to switch off.

Byssal walked in quickly, sparing no nerves that there might be a normal human in the building. He ruffled Kyrie’s hair as he walked by. Before there was even a chance to bring up Melody, Byss went to drop off his equipment. Kyrie turned in worry, but she’d already come out from where she could potentially be trapped. She looked more confident facing Byssal than when she faced him. 

Byssal crouched down to have her at eye level. Kyrie nearly slapped himself, of course he should have done that. There was a heavy silence while the two stared at each other. He was ready to intervene.

“Who are you?” Byssal asked. Kyrie could hear the slight annoyance. His patrol of the city had probably been bothersome. Melody could be scared, it would be even worse if she left because Byssal scared her. Kyrie started to stand.

“I’m Melody, your new technician. It’s a pleasure to meet you,” her voice was different, more professional. More confident. Kyrie relaxed back into his chair. He was just going to make a fool of himself. “I assume you’re Byssal then?”

“Stay where we can see you.” 

“I’ll stay where the tools I need are set up. If you have to see me you can come to me.”

Silence. Kyrie couldn’t keep his eyes from going wide. None of the others ever talked back like that. They just agreed. Byssal stood up to his full height. It blocked Melody from Kyrie’s view. He watched as the shorter guardian brought his hand up and towards her.

“I think you’ll be the first to last here,” Byssal must have been smiling. He heard Melody shout ‘Hey!’ just as Byss turned around. For the small time he could see her she was smoothing down her hair. Byssal must have ruffled her hair like he did Kyrie’s. So she was accepted…

The rest of the day passed in a near blur. Kyrie left for his own patrol. He left early actually. Byssal and Melody were talking. Simple things, about the equipment and how she’s settling in. Byss was friendlier to her than any of the others, Pel would be happy to know that. Probably because she wasn’t scared. He didn’t need to walk on eggshells… Kyrie did. Kyrie had to and he couldn’t stop himself from feeling jealous that he couldn’t talk to Melody the same way Byssal did.

By the time he got back he knew she would be gone. Walking in he was shocked to see Melody standing on a piece of his equipment. One of the tasers that could force a guardian back down to human size. It was open, but the panel she must have removed wasn’t set up where she could put it back in place. She turned around just as he resolved himself to try talking to her.

“Oh good you’re back,” she smiled. She smiled at him. He couldn’t believe it. His entire body filled with warmth as he smiled. “Just after Byssal left the panel fell off the holder. I don’t like leaving something so important exposed overnight. Could you place it back for me?”

Kyrie’s voice was stuck. All he could do was nod. Cautiously he walked over, worried one step could be too heavy and send her falling into the open wires below. How safe was it for someone so small to work on these things? Couldn’t they have a guardian do this so no one would risk getting hurt? He pushed the thoughts away as soon as he towered over her.

Slowly he raised his hand up and reached over her. She looked so small next to him. She’d freeze outside. The air was chilly to him, how could she be comfortable? He wanted to hold her close. Keep her safe and warm through the autumn and winter. He wrapped his fingers around the panel pulling it up to hover over her.

“Great, the smaller end goes right in front of me,” she said. It was funny, others always shouted when talking to him. Melody didn’t. He moved the smaller edge of the panel closer to her. Her small hands grabbed it and pulled down. Seamlessly he put the panel back in place with her guidance. A loud click sounded as he let go and she walked forward on it. Locked in place. “Perfect! Thank you, I wasn’t sure how to deal with this if you went straight home.”

Melody laughed. She laughed talking to him and his heart pounded. Somehow… somehow he’d get a chance with her. To talk to her like normal. He just didn’t know how yet. Kyrie tried to make his voice work, but as had become standard his nerves stopped him. It took far too long for him to finally manage, “No problem.”

“Heh… uh great then I guess I’ll see you in a few days. Still need to get settled after moving and all.”

She laughed again. Awkward and uncomfortable. Kyrie made her feel that way. The warm feeling her smile gave him died quickly. Of course he was making her uncomfortable. He pulled his hands back and left her without a word. A short pause at his desk before he left for the day. By the time he walked by where she’d been she was gone…

Kyrie walked out into the cool, crisp air with a sigh. He would never be able to make himself seem safe to her. It wasn’t even that she was openly afraid. He was scared. Terrified of ruining this. The first person he’d had any interest in since he became a guardian and he’d definitely ruined it by now. He couldn’t even have a normal conversation with her…

That was the first thing he’d fix. The next time they met he’d talk to her. About something, anything. Even if it was just the weather. He’d manage to have a conversation. With that settled in his mind he made his way home. He had the first patrol in the morning.

The next morning Kyrie woke up early. He arrived at a cold and dark office. Somehow he sort of hoped she’d be there even if she was off the next few days. He’d have the chance to try talking to her. To apologize for being stiff and making her uncomfortable. Instead he grabbed his equipment and left. The patrol would give him time to think.

Morning patrols were one of the few things he enjoyed. It was nice to watch as the city slowly woke up. Guardians and humans leaving their homes to start their day. Outdoor seating was always popular, and he got to see all the people just enjoying the morning. Tables had special additions to keep voices blocked from guardians walking by, something inner tables didn’t share. Along with heaters for colder weather and protection from rain or snow they were popular. A treat for humans…

Kyrie let out a heavy sigh as he turned a corner. Melody had said he was still human. He never felt like that. Nothing he’d known matched him anymore, no one he knew looked at him the same. Sometimes he wondered why the government even picked him to be a peacekeeper. They should have sent him off on some dangerous mission. One that might keep him gone for good…

Amidst his darker thoughts he heard something he didn’t expect. Melody’s laugh. He couldn’t help himself from looking for it, finding a coffee shop nearby. There she was walking towards a table. He couldn’t tell if she was alone or not, but she was there. This could be his chance.

A quick check of his phone showed he had time. He’d get a drink and try to figure out a way to talk to her. If he took long enough to pick something he might catch her leaving. As casually as he could he walked towards the shop and stood back just enough other guardians could go up and order. Now he had to decide. Now his plan started to fall apart. He didn’t like coffee.

Kyrie tried to read the menu, but it just left him confused. A lot of names for things he barely understood. Lattes, cappuccinos,  espressos. All caffeine, all things he never quite enjoyed. At this rate he’d miss Melody leaving, miss his chance to show he could be normal, all because he didn’t drink coffee. This was quite possibly one of his worst ideas yet.

“Hey, Kyrie, that is you right?” Melody’s voice caught him off guard. 

He turned to find her standing close to him. Closer than most other humans did near his feet. He wanted to act casual, to seem normal, so he crouched. That just made it worse. She stumbled back when he moved, her smile faltered. A smile aimed at him and he was already about to ruin it again. Maybe it was better if he kept to himself. He was too big… too dangerous. It was better to protect humans and stay on his-

“You looked kind of lost, is everything alright?” she smiled at him again. Kyrie watched her push her long brown hair back behind her ear. An arm wrapped around her middle supporting the other arm while she waited for him to answer.

“I… don’t drink a lot of coffee,” he mumbled. She laughed. He made her laugh. That was good, her smile aimed at him again.

“It is pretty cold out. I can see why you’re here to get something. On patrol right?”

“Yeah, just thought a warm drink would be a good idea.” She was leading the conversation. She was talking to him. That made this perfect.

“Well, there’s the caramel apple latte right now, just sweet enough you don’t notice the coffee. They only have it for a few more weeks.” This time she giggled. If he didn’t know better he’d think she was nervous. Not nervous because of his size, but nervous for the same reasons he was. “My friends think the pumpkin spice cappuccino is the best. Although they have warm apple cider and hot chocolate if you want to skip the coffee entirely.”

“What would you recommend?” Kyrie wanted to try holding her. His nails dug into his palm to keep from reaching out and making her uncomfortable. They were talking and everything was fine. This was a start.

“Probably the caramel apple latte. I have to admit it’s my favorite. One of the many reasons I like cold weather. Well especially autumn actually. Lots of apple things.”

Kyrie smiled at her. The way she fidgeted when she said that. The cute way she played with her hair as she met his eyes. Brown might become his favorite color if Melody stayed around him. He might start to love autumn too. He had to take a risk. To ask her out; To dinner, a movie, anything.

Instead he stood up straight, staring at how small she was. A strange feeling came over him. He sort of liked how small she was next to him. Everyone else felt weird, made him feel weird. She made him feel normal. Normal and maybe even human.

“Guess I’ll try that, thanks Mel-,” his voice caught when she moved. She walked right up to the normal barista and didn’t pause. She turned to smile at him again.

“What size?” she asked. Kyrie just shrugged. He wasn’t even sure she could register his shrug, but she did. Somehow she did.

“Can I get a large caramel latte for me and a colossus medium for my friend?” Kyrie watched the barista lean forward to look at him. The usual fear others had when seeing him came out. They quickly ducked away. He couldn’t tell if they spoke, but Melody turned back to him. Still smiling at him.

“They said it should take a few minutes. You won’t get in trouble standing around right?”

“No, uh they don’t really monitor us. Byss just likes the idea of us being out in town more. He’s been doing this whole thing a lot longer than me.”

“Oh, it seemed like you’d been there a long time. How long-”

“Miss!” The barista’s voice cut their conversation short. Kyrie couldn’t stop himself from wondering if Melody wanted to know how long he’d been a guardian or how long he’d been doing this job. It wasn’t uncommon for people to wonder. He could have been a teenager or it could have been a year ago.

“Your drink should be ready soon.” Kyrie crouched. He didn’t want her to go yet. He didn’t want to lose this chance. ”I should probably get back to my friends. I’ll… I’ll see you at work in a few days.” 

Without thinking he reached out to stop her. Two fingers covered her almost entirely. She was cold, a different cold than the rest of the world. A calming ice on his own skin. He hadn’t noticed it the first time. He did realize how much of a mistake he made when she pushed against his fingers.

“Sorry!” he squeaked, Kyrie had no idea he could squeak. He pulled his fingers apart, but hovered close to her still. “I just, uh, I just wanted to ask if we could go out some… time…”

Kyrie couldn’t look at her. He’d literally just pinched her between two fingers to stop her from leaving. Of course she’d say no. She’d leave, that laugh that caught his attention would be gone. The smile that wasn’t just trying to keep him calm would change. 

—--------------------------

Melody tried not to die from embarrassment as soon as he grabbed her. She was trying so hard not to annoy him. Especially after he heard her on the phone. Now he was asking her out. The tallest colossus in years and he wanted to date her!? 

“O-oh, s-sure,” she laughed. Of course she laughed. She was always laughing when she was nervous. His eyes were piercing. She loved that shade of blue. “Maybe this Friday? A-after work?”

Kyrie just stared at her. For once she wished she dressed for the weather. A scarf could hide her embarrassingly wide smile. The fingers around her moved closer, but he pulled his hand back instead of touching her. She couldn’t believe how warm he was and how much she liked it. She’d never liked warmth much before.

“Friday would be amazing,” he breathed. She could smell mint on his breath. “A few hours after work, maybe eight? I can meet you at your place. As long as that’s ok?”

“Yes!" Melody nearly shouted it and she felt like an idiot. He’d back out if she couldn’t play it cool. 

“Sir, y-your coffee is ready!” the barista called. 

Kyrie stood up to his full, dizzying height.  As much as she hated heights, she wanted to be up by him. Play with his hair even. It looked so soft, another strange shade of blue. Just like his eyes. 

She watched him grab the coffee. It was bigger than the building the barista was in. He took a sip of it. Melody felt her cheeks heat up, thank god the cold could be blamed today. She hoped he liked it. Liked her after they went out. He smiled down at her, crouching to be close again.

“I can see why you like this,” he said. “It sort of tastes like autumn. Thanks. Give me your address at work later this week?”

“Sure!”

Melody watched as he walked off. One of her friends came up gushing about what just happened. She couldn’t even think about it. She had a date. With Kyrie.

“You know you dropped your coffee when he grabbed you,” her friend said. Melody looked at the cup on the ground.

“It’s ok, I still have the one at our table,” Melody whispered, finally walking back to her seat. 

[malarkgirlypop]

MEDIC! Part 28 (Donald Malarkey x Fem!OC)

This is the final part of episode 9. I have been putting off writing this for so long cause the episode makes me so sad, and writing it was even worse. Just a constant state of depression while writing this ngl. But it's ok, I finished it. I'm also scared cause that means we are getting to the end of the story and I kinda don't want it to end. But we must have a conclusion. We still have a whole episode to go and who knows what will happen.

This is in means no way to offend anyone.

Disclaimer: End part of episode 9, if you are not comfortable with this please don't read.

Based on the HBO show and the actors who portray the characters, not hate to anyone involved.

Tag list: @imusicaddict, anyone else please let me know.

The bed of the truck was silent, everyone hung their heads, or quietly shed their tears. I clutched onto Don’s hand as we rode back into town. 

We loaded out of the trucks and into the deli we had parked in front of. We grabbed all the food from the shop, wheels of cheese, bread, meats, anything we could get our hands on. 

I loaded bread into baskets, carrying them under my arms making my way back to the vehicles. I walked past Web in the entrance pinning down the owner of the shop, a gun pressed to his neck. 

“Web!” I exclaimed, rushing over to the two men. 

The owner rambled in German, trying to get out of the situation that Webster had him in. 

“Web, let him go!” I tried to get into his eye line but his focus was on the man, I could see the rage in his eyes. 

“He says he doesn’t know what the hell you’re talking about.” Another soldier told him. 

“Bullshit!” Web spat. Finally loosening his grip on the man and stepping away, stowing his gun back in its holster, stomping out the front door. 

I watched the owner try and regain his panicked breath, before I too left. 

Hands reached out, scrambling for the food we provided. I gave out bread to as many people as I could, I hesitated to give the cheese and meats we had taken.

These men hadn’t been fed in weeks, maybe even longer, if we gave them rich food they would get sick. We needed to give them rations, only small portions, if we gave them full meals it could be deadly. 

“Major Winters.” I called to the man as he handed out bread to the prisoners. He stopped turning to face me. 

“Yes?” Dick asked moving closer to the edge of the truck to where I stood. 

“Sir, we need to be cautious of how much food we are giving the prisoners. If we feed them too much they could die. Also we just need to be giving out bread and water. Any other rich food causes them to get sick as well.” His brows furrowed as I informed him. 

Nixon and Winters looked at me as if I had grown two heads, but before I could open my mouth to explain further Colonel Skin called to the men. 

I made my way back to the group, ushering the men who had food away from the trucks so that others could come and get food as well. 

It wasn’t long until Nix and Dick made their way back to the trucks after conversing with the Colonel. 

“Lieb.” Winters called out to Joe, who was handing out food to the prisoners. I watched him leap from the truck and push through the crowd past me to meet with the pair. 

They spoke in hushed tones, Winters did most of the talking while Nix’s eyes glanced around nervously. Lieb stood strangely still, taking in all the information that was being given to him. Joe shook his head with a grim look on his face, I couldn’t hear what he said but he didn’t seem happy with whatever it was they were going to make him translate to the men. 

He bowed his head, giving a begrudging nod before turning back to face the trucks. I stood within the crowd watching him. He moved slowly through the men, not pushing or asking people to move. It was as if he didn’t want to make it to the destination he was heading. 

I glanced back to Dick, who was speaking to Grant and Christenson, more words exchanged, more reluctant head nods. 

Lieb’s loud voice pulled my focus. He stood on the back of the truck yelling in German, trying to get everyone’s attention. 

A hand landed on my shoulder, I didn’t have time to glimpse who it was, their face moved closer to my ear. 

“We are locking the prisoners back up, be prepared.” Grant whispered, he didn’t wait around for my reply, moving to the next soldier to give the same message. 

I stepped back out of the crowd, Easy had already surrounded the prisoners while Lieb began to speak. 

The prisoners cried in protest, shaking their heads in disbelief, but before they could even try to put up a fight the men moved them forward, pushing them closer to the hell they were just freed from, only to be locked up again by their so-called saviours.     

I looked away from the awful scene, to lay eyes on Lieb. He had finished his announcement, crumpling into the bed of the truck in defeat. His chest heaved, sobs leaving mouth. 

I was in the bed of the truck in seconds, clambering in as quickly as I could to kneel in front of Joe. I wrapped my arms around him pulling him into my embrace, I clung to him as he wept. His warm tears dripped down my neck as he crushed me to his chest. I didn’t utter a word, I couldn’t think of anything to say to make the situation better. So I just held him, my hand tangling in his hair at the nape of his neck, the other rubbed circles on his back trying to sooth his pain. 

But I don’t think much would ease the hurt, this is something that he would have to carry with him until the day he died. 

*************************************

“Em, come on, let’s go.” Babe knelt in front of me, his warm hands on my arms. I looked up from the floor to find we were back in the village. 

“They have dinner for us inside.” Babe urged, giving me a squeeze. I nodded my head, finding my feet to stand and get out of the bed of the truck. My autopilot had been turned off, now everything felt manual. Even the parts that weren’t, in and out, keep breathing. 

I sat at the end of the table with my hands in my lap. I stared down into the bowl of soup that had been placed in front of me. The sight of food churned my stomach, I closed my eyes willing the nausea to pass. The room spun and the smell of the camp wouldn’t leave my brain. Saliva filled my mouth as my teeth began to violently chatter, there was no stopping it. 

I sprung to my feet, hand gripping my mouth begging the contents of my stomach to stay put so I could make it outside. 

I hid behind the side of the house we boarded at heaving and gagging. I spat the taste from the mouth, leaning against the wall for support. 

A handkerchief was thrusted under my face, I looked up to see who had followed me outside. But it wasn’t one of the men. Speirs stood still holding out the cloth for me to take, a sad smile plaguing his lips. 

“Thanks.” I sniffed, taking the handkerchief and wiping my running nose. After I was done I handed it back to him. 

“You keep it.” Spiers pushed it back towards me. 

“Oh right, you probably don’t want my snot all over it.” I pocketed the material. 

“Do you want to sit?” Speirs asked, motioning his head towards the bench further down the side of the house. 

“Sure.” I nodded making my way to the seat. 

We sat in silence for a bit, watching soldiers pass us by. I was glad to be outside and not still sitting at the table. 

“Are you doing ok?” Ron broke the comfortable silence. I looked over, his eyes were still trained on the world ahead of him. 

“No.” I replied. I thought about lying, making excuses, saying other people were having it worse, but I chose the truth. Ron knew me well, it seemed like more work to be deceptive. 

“How about you?” I asked, keeping my eyes straight ahead at the view before us. 

“Yeah, not great either.” He said quietly. I bit my lip, guess he figured the same as me. Lying to each other was a waste of time. 

“I feel awful about locking them up again. I know it’s to keep them safe and alive, but we had teased them with freedom, only to put them back into that nightmare.” I rambled on, my feelings finally spilling from my lips. 

“Me too.” Speirs agreed, his hand reached over to mine. Ron took my hand giving it a squeeze, before putting it in his lap. 

“There are more.” He said sadly as he traced circles in my palm. “Some are worse.” 

I nodded as I listened to him speak. 

“But you already knew that.” I quickly turned my attention back to the man, a questioning look on my face, how did he?

“I spoke to Malarkey. He told me that the nurses had heard rumours about the camps.” He informed me. 

“Oh.” I said, sighing in relief, for a split second I thought he had somehow figured out my secret.  

“What are we going to do?” I wondered out loud. Maybe Ron had some answers to my questions. 

“Well we are leaving, but the locals here are going to be made to bury the bodies. General Taylor is going to be issuing martial law soon. Every able bodied German here will be made to clean up tomorrow morning.” Speirs replied. 

“There are so many to bury. Who’s making sure that they follow martial law?” I asked.  

“I know, but it’s what's right. Those people need to be laid to rest. And to answer your question, the 10th Armored are going to supervise.” Speirs placed my hand back into my own lap, before standing. I looked up at the man, the sad smile again on his lips. Ron cupped my cheek gently, his thumb tracing my cheekbone before walking off. 

I sat outside for a time longer, watching people pass me by. Soon night fell and I made my way back into the house, to rest. I didn’t think sleep would be so kind to take me tonight, so I laid on the bed staring at the ceiling above me, waiting patiently for the sun to rise again. 

We sat in a bombed out building overlooking what used to be the town square, rubble and debris covered the ground. We watched as the locals slowly cleaned, a quartet had formed in the middle of it all. They played sad songs, it was hauntingly beautiful. 

The men smoked as they watched, no one spoke, only looked on. Nixon appeared beside me, he looked solemn. Lew took a beat before speaking.

“Hitler’s dead.” It wasn’t a joyous announcement, his tone remained steady, no smile formed behind his eyes, it was just a fact. 

Nix caught our attention though, everyone’s head swivelled in his direction, looking to see if he was telling us the truth. 

“Holy shit.” Lieb whispered. 

“Shot himself in Berlin.” Nix finished his statement. 

“Is the war over, sir?” Bull asked hesitantly, hopefully. 

“No.” Lew was never one to mince his words, or put them prettily. He was straight to the point, didn’t matter if he hurt your feelings or not, he would say it how it was. 

Still it crushed the shreds of hope we all felt momentarily blossom in our chests. 

“We have orders to Berchtesgaden. We’re going to move out in one hour.” Lew informed us. I sighed more orders, how was there more? 

“Why? The man’s not home.” Web asked, I nodded thinking the same thing. Couldn’t this all be over by now? 

Nonetheless we all got up from our perches and made our way out of the building. Web went on about how the man should’ve killed himself three years ago to save us all the trouble. 

“You all good?” Lieb nudged me. I nodded. 

“Just tired.” But that’s not what I meant. I was tired, but it wasn’t due to the lack of sleep from last night, I was tired. I just want to go home, but ironically I don’t even have one. 

“Let’s just get this over with.” I looped my arm through Lieb’s as we left the building making our way back so we could pack up and move out. 

-------------------------------------

Chapter 29

[meekmedea]

Ok, this has been nagging at me almost all week, but the epilogue for fatum faciendum est got me thinking…

Do Clemensia and Coriolanus end up having more than one child? Probably. They both seemed open to the idea.

And then I fell down a rabbit hole of random thoughts. I think it’d be a bit funny if their daughter in the epilogue gets their wish granted. So without further ado, let me present my ramblings: 

Clemmie’s doomed to be the only one in the family with pin-straight hair. It’s kind of funny because she’ll just be waiting, bored to death as the rest of them go through their 12 step hair routine. (Coryo probably takes the longest to style his hair 😆)

At the same time, Coryo’s fated to have children that mostly take after Clemmie in her eye colour and hair colour

Pandora - their eldest is a little bit of a blabbermouth (she’s like 5 - let’s cut her a little slack). When she next sees Tigris and the topic of gifts comes up, she mentions to Tigris that she’s getting a sibling for her birthday.

Tigris tries really hard not to laugh at Clemmie + Coryo, while these 2 are like “huh, maybe we should have a talk with our kid about what info should stay a secret.” Because there’s no way in hell that Coryo wants to deal with that info being shared to Clemmie’s parents. 

Number of kids? Hmm…maybe 4?

Pandora, their eldest (dark curly hair, and brown eyes)

Eirene - another daughter - this is their only child that has his blond hair + blue eyes

To everyone’s amusement, Pandora is disappointed that her new sister has blue eyes, but says she guesses it’s acceptable (Pandora’s parents are amused - Clemmie more so than Coryo)

A boy follows very quickly, this time it follows Pandora's request lol (dark curly hair and brown eyes). Eirene and Aurelius could be considered Irish twins with how small the gap between them is. 

Then there’s a considerable age gap between Aurelius and their last child. Unplanned, but it’s another daughter –Lytta. (Another dark curly haired child, but with blue eyes)

When asked if they have a favourite child, they both say ‘no’. But whereas Clemensia means it, Coriolanus doesn’t. (Hint it’s his eldest.)

Their parenting? 

Clemmie is a bit more involved than he is

At her behest, the children have some sort of artistic education whether that be music, art, dance etc...

And at some point, each of their children have probably approached Coryo for something that Clemmie has said ‘no’ to. When asked why they’re asking him then, they’ll say, “because Mom isn’t the boss of you.” 

The first time he’s hit with that, Coriolanus wonders if it is a trick question. He has now learnt that there is a correct and an incorrect answer. Being President of Panem doesn’t exempt him from Clemmie’s ire. (He really wished it did though.)

Very quickly, he realizes that most of their children have taken after Clemmie's ability to charm just about anyone. Especially their eldest. Despite it not being as efficient as Clemmie’s - he’s fallen for it more times than he should

~

Bonus: one of Persephone and Festus’ kids falls HARD for one of Clemensia and Coriolanus’ kids. 

Worse yet (for Coryo) - it’s his eldest AND it’s reciprocated 

[ghost-skull-trash]

Within this hell, tear out your heart to survive.

Within the rusting hell that was the Hadal Blacksite, An inventor waits for their friend to return safely, they wait and wait but… they haven’t returned. Now they journey through hell to find them, meeting those who want them dead along the way. Happiness has to be fought for after all.

So with some of my friends encouraging me to try and put some of my fics here! This one came to mind JUST as I was about to fall asleep, thus its very messy, hell I expect like three people to even see this so don't expect the next house of leaves, OK? Anywho I hope you enjoy! :D

The only clock in the room was broken, a mess of components and broken black plastic, picked clean of what’s useful and what left to gather dust, like the rest of this hellish site. .

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Rain held her stomach in pain, hunger pangs  making every breath feel like torture, her eyes were dull, staring into nothing, too exhausted to focus on anything in her makeshift room, sitting below her “bed” the fairy lights gave a soft glow, illuminating her thick dark hair, partially kept up in a half-assed bun and making her dull orange gorka pop out from the shadows.

In Front of her sat a cup of self heating noodles boiling away, having to restrain herself from eating them raw and risking a myriad of illnesses.

the only clock broken she counted down in her head when she could eat, she felt it kept herself sane, but that’s hard to prove when you find yourself rambling for hours on end to nobody and not even realising you're doing it until your throat is red and hoarse.

Distant gunshots and the facility groaning with the noises of death made her nauseous and worried… worried about getting hunted down by her employers or some poor sod they sent in their place… or they would end up hurting her partner, SEVER who was still out trying to find supplies or some way to get the both of them out of this iron coffin.

SEVER was the only thing keeping her going at this point, early on she would've laid down and let the cold metal be her grave, being her last thoughts be that of the warm grass of home, or her late father, but SEVER was too kind, they stuck by her even on her worse days, before she re-grew her heart and chose to care again and to show her love, asking her quizzically about her large collection of movies and music, being intrigued by her stories of home and dancing with her on those lonely nights, it made this box feel like home.

Rain slowly ate the oily noodles, little clumps of chicken floating in the lightly chilli flavoured broth… normally she wouldn’t even eat this even as a dare, but when you are slowly wasting away with the risk of starvation to boot, it made them palatable … she would rather eat expired lasagne mre’s though…

The only entrance to the room was a partial crushed door or as an emergency, the site spanning ventilation shafts, on the day the site went into chaos something crashed into the door just as it was about to close, jamming it inwards and leaving only a small gap to crawl through, even still that gap is mostly hidden with boxes or shelves whenever SEVER goes out on a supply run.

Crunched the empty cup under her boot, sitting at her desk and reading through whatever she could, files, instructions manuals , anything, that if she and sever got out of here she could use it as blackmail or evidence against this hell.

Picking up a book from one of the many piles of junk and garbage that made up her room, she gave it a look over, it was a maroon coloured book detailing recommended purchases for the site, such as canteen supplies, vending machine stocking and printer ink, it goes of this tediously detailing the history of when such orders started, any interest on potential suppliers and cost reduction.. It was 637 pages of near microscopic records and mind numbing drivel, even when it was describing how an employee was crushed flat like a pancake, bones to powder from a dropped shipping container made Rain yawn in boredom.

It was hard to focus, she always found it hard to focus but now it feels impossible, like she is chasing after one letter at a time before the word makes sense, closing the manual and ripping up the empty noodle cup, she used a dry bit as a bookmark and tossing it back into the pile.

Sitting back on the floor at the foot of her bed her mind once again wandered, thinking of everything she made in this hell.. one such mistake was a robot, the Z-809 Casket, originally tasked with smaller mineral collection, to pick up debris from larger automatons latter used instead to find convicts trying to escape, whether barely alive or dead, the robot would pick them up and shove it into its compartments, limbs often sticking out, sometimes moving, sometimes accompanied by screams.

Another machine she made was the Z-730 The MacroMiner. A bacteriophage styled automaton suited for high pressure exploration and building, with a specialised compartment in its chest designed to be able to be filled with supplies to then walk along the seabed to its destination.

Rain had a plan to implement a back door into its code so she could utilise them for sabotage against the company, but it was never completed,, surely there is some code leftover she could use but…

Her thoughts dwindled as her eyelids grew heavy, she has been struggling to stay awake, spending most of her time sleeping or laying in bed, she feels so weak.. And SEVER still hasn’t come back yet..

Rain looked at the busted door, judging her options, she knew she was going to die.. but wasn’t sure as to when or how.

Her poor condition clouded her better judgement as she crawled under the broken door in order to find SEVER.

 peeking out from behind a box, her eyes struggling to adjust to the darkness, the emergency lights having been broken or burned out, Rain felt something else in the room, something with many arms that reached out like octopus legs, grasping and cold, her orange goggles developing frost as Rain swears she saw white glowing eyes floating around her.

Staying close to the floor she felt along the cold concrete walls for another door, her hand brushed against its metal frame as the door shot open, blinding her with the light from the other room, rubbing her eyes, the room she was in felt empty once again, the twisting shadows disappearing.

The other room was a mechanical bay, scientists would test out whatever Geneva Convention breaking toys they had on test dummies, engineers used it as a glorified storage unit for their junk, and occasionally a tall serpentine man with a third arm and an angler fish light would come by for spare tools and materials, he looked dead inside, Rain never said hello to him and neither did he, she could feel the hatred emitting from him anytime he looked at her, as if he was cursing her out in his head perhaps calling her a monster under her breath.. she didn’t blame him, she would hate herself too.

The only thing not taken was a bulky red wrench, used for fastening bolts on the outside of the underwater base, inconvenient to use traditionally but otherwise a great weapon.

Rain kept walking, room after room, the dull buzz of the electrical system going haywire, distant screams from what she can assume were either her former co-workers or “expendables” that were sent down to grab whatever they can, either way Rain decided not to take her chance with meeting either.

Her walking came to a stop, the room was pitch black, something she was used to by now, but that wasn’t what made her pause, there was furniture everywhere, overturned or broken, and riddled with smouldering bullet holes.