#this is probably the last scan i'll share from this series

[hotwaterandmilk]

Series: Hotaru no Yomeiri Artist: Tachibana Oreco Product: Honya Club 'Zenkoku Shotenin ga Eranda Osusume Comic 2024' With-Purchase Illustration Card (02/2024) Source: Scanned from my personal collection

[carcarcraziiv2]

The Woman with the Pink Hair (Parts 10, 11, 12, and 13 (final))

HERE ARE THE LAST PARTS FOR THE WOMAN WITH THE PINK HAIR! I Sincerely hope you enjoyed <3. I have already started the next story in the series (oooo). Lmk if you wanna see it! <3

This is a Vi x Fem! Reader fanfiction.

Please note that this is the first piece I wrote after a HEFTY (I mean years long) hiatus from writing.

P.S. Lowkey I KNOW there's a bunch of shit I could fix in here to make it better due to my practice over the past year or so, but I just… I'm so lazy rn LOL. Anyhoooooo….

ALSO- here are the TW for you lovelies! (This is for the WHOLE SERIES)-

Violence, mental illness, oral sex, dominant tendencies, torture, kidnapping, plotting?… lowkey there's probably more but you should get the gist here, AS ALWAYS ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK ILY<3

READ PART ONE, TWO, AND THREE HERE->

https://www.tumblr.com/carcarcraziiv2/737189248110821376/the-woman-with-the-pink-hair-p-1-2-3?source=share

READ PART FOUR, FIVE, AND SIX HERE->

https://www.tumblr.com/carcarcraziiv2/738139002294747136/the-woman-with-the-pink-hair-p-4-5-6?source=share

READ PART SEVEN, EIGHT, AND NINE HERE-> https://www.tumblr.com/carcarcraziiv2/739738198020964352/the-woman-with-the-pink-hair-part-7-8-9?source=share

~~

PART TEN - Vi

 "What the hell...?", Vi said lightly, scanning the top deck of the ship she just boarded after returning from her confrontation with Kench. She was not in the mood for anything but a drink and to cuddle up with (y/n). Her stomach plummeted when she saw the small pool of blood a few feet away.

    Blind panic fills her soul, and she bolts for the stairs. Please don't be gone. Please don't be gone. She thinks to herself, silently pleading to the Gods she wasn't even sure exists. Basically jumping down the small flight of stairs into the cabin of the ship, she notices it is in disarray. The dark wooden table was flipped, and glass was shattered all over the floor. There was a trail of water from the top deck, down the stairs, leading directly to a dead stop in front of the room the two lovers were occupying.

   "Fuck, no no no!" Vi yelled, running down the hallway, and bursting into the room. The armoire was open, but there was no (y/n). "Fuck!" Her hands reached up to her hair, pulling as she fell to her knees. Her shoulders slumped, and she lowered her head and began to cry.

    After a few minutes of sobbing, Vi slowly crept up onto her feet again. No emotion on her face, her eyes glazed and icy cold. She walked over to the chest at the end of the bed and pulled it open. Inside were two large fighting gauntlets. She hadn't used them since all of the bullshit with Jayce. 

    There is no better time than the present, and she was prepared to destroy anyone in her path to finding (y/n). 

--- 🖤🖤🖤 ---

    "Please! Please! I'll do anything, just don-" Crack.

    The sickening crunch that resounded through the dark rocky cavern made you shiver. Prior to what you assumed to have been the untimely death of some other prisoner down here, the voice had sounded like a young woman, much like yourself. 

    You did not move as you waited to hear anymore sounds, shuffling, or wet slapping footsteps. Waiting nearly 20 minutes, you finally let out a gasp of breath, and crawled back to your corner where a useless excuse for a bed lay on the floor. It was nothing but a long, dirty piece of fabric. At one point, you were sure, it had been padded. 

   The cell was entirely uncomfortable, and you were sure you had been there for at least a week at this point. You prayed, which you never ever did, for someone to rescue you. The things that you and Vi shared for some reason did not fully convince you that she would want to go through the trouble of rescuing you. Hell, you didn't hardly know anything about her.

   Over the days that you had spent here, they had been sending in plates of slop, you weren't entirely certain of its origin, that smelled like absolute ass. The first few days you refused to eat, and Tahm personally came to inform you that if you didn't eat, he would either kill you or let you starve to death. You were sure no matter what you did, you had a death sentence over your head, but due to fear and your hunger you decided after the third day to finally just eat it. After today's food was delivered, a few hours after the confrontation down the hall, you heard those wet sloppy footsteps approaching the iron gate of your cell. 

    As the steps approached, you quickly scurried to the very most corner of the room, drawing your knees to your chin as you awaited and prayed that the beat would continue past. To your dismay, the large shadow enunciated by the faint candlelight in the hall stopped right before your door. 

    "(Y/N), I have some questions for you. Do you wish to comply, or are you going to make me force them from you?" The long-winded question reverberated through your body, making you tense up and tingles run down your spine. 

   You stayed silent. If there was anything you would do, talking would not be one of them.

   The creature let out a defeated sigh, and you held still, not wanting to react. Even as a tear began to fall down your face and the creature wabbled inside, and engulfed you in the rancid large mouth, you still did not struggle. 

    Mind blank, the only thought in your head was how easy it would be to break you. You had the pain tolerance of a baby and were terrified of what he might do. 

   As Tahm Kench walked, you sloshed around in the small space you were in. You could feel his long tongue wrapped around you like a rope holding you tight. Although slick and slimy, it did not budge when you dared to fidget ever so slightly. You simply squeezed your eyes shut, and forced the rising bile back down your throat as the journey quickly came to a stop. 

   He spit you out, and again you landed on a hard floor. Before you had the opportunity to take in your surroundings, two gruff pairs of hands were dragging you off the ground and sitting you onto a lone chair. Looking around, your eyes straining from the brightness, you realized that the sun was shining through a broken window to the left. In fact, it appeared that you were being kept underneath a large, abandoned boating house. 

  You were quickly snapped out of your realization when the monster began to speak..

   "Tell me, (y/n), how do you know Vi?"

   Silence.

   He let out a soft chuckle, and leaned closer to you, the motion looking hard due to the bulkiness of his body.

   "I will give you one more chance, child. How do you know Vi?" 

    Remaining silent once more, you conjured the spit in your mouth and spewed it directly into the monster's face. He took a moment to wipe the spit off of his face. Turning around, his chubby arms resting at his side, he looked over at one of his minions and nodded slightly before continuing his venture to the other side of the room. 

    Panic blossomed as you noticed what one of them was holding. In its green, wet hand you saw the sheen of a blade. You leaned as far away as you could as the creature approached you slowly, as if it was enjoying your fear. It leaned in, its face mere inches from your own, it raised the knife and pressed it to your cheek, snickering. It began to slowly press in, when you let out a sharp hiss.

    "She's my girlfriend," You said quickly, silently cursing yourself for breaking so quickly. As you realized the shit you were in, you prayed that he would not ask any in depth questions that you didn't know the answer to. You knew they wouldn't believe you. 

   Tahm turned back towards you, a long smile spreading on it's face.

   "Good," He said, and you felt he wasn't simply talking about your answer, but more so the ability to break you. 

PART ELEVEN- Unleashed

 Getting thrown back into your cell, you were wholly torn apart. The evil menace that had captured you picked you up, crumpled you in his palms, and threw you onto the ground. Entirely spent, you could not sleep, not while you knew that those demons were wandering the halls and rooms above you thinking you are hiding some important information from them. 

    You aren't.

    You hadn't a speck of knowledge aside from the things that you and Vi had shared. Kisses, long gazes, conversations about both of your childhoods. You realized, in that moment, that you didn't even know what her favorite color was. What kind of food she liked to eat or where she liked to go to get away from it all. 

    You decided that when - if - you got out of this hell hole, you were going to make a point of learning all of those things.

    Sighing, you wince as you roll over on the decrepit pad on the floor. Your ribs were bruised, at the least, if not having a few broken. Every breath you took caused a sharp lingering pain to blossom in your torso. There were small lashes on your arms, your face, and you were sticky from the sweat and blood covering your skin. As you laid there, tears falling at their own will down your cheek and onto the mattress, you prayed once more for your savior to find you.

--- 🖤🖤🖤---

---         VI         ---   

    "Tell me where the hell she is, I don't want this to be harder than it needs to be, Illaoi. Please, please just tell me," Vi seethed, her fists where clenched inside the large foreboding gauntlets.  Her heart was racing and breaking beneath her white tank top, her thick arms straining with the stress coursing through her veins. 

    Before her, Illaoi sat in an old brown leather chair, her legs spread and her forearms resting on her knees. Her fists were held together, acting as a podium in which she rest her sodden and tired face. 

    "Vi, I don't know where he keeps them. I only know where his base is. I am telling you this because I have been bound to that monster for far too long, and I, too, want to get my revenge. But please, you must call down. He has cronies all over the town, some who may be lingering these very halls. Their hearing is keen and sharp, and they will do anything in their power to protect their boss."

    "Do you think I give a single shit about that? Take me to his base," Vi spat, her body unflinching as she gave Illaoi the option, no, the order to take her where she needed to go. She would break through every god damn house in Bilgewater if it meant finding (y/n).

    "Vi, I ca-,"

    Vi slammed her fist against the wall, making the house shake. Dust fluttered off of the shelves and ceiling, littering Vi's shoulders and arms like sad rain.

    "Take. Me. There. Now." She said calmly, but her calm demeanor only hid the wrath behind her eyes so much. Illaoi sighed, standing. She was a tall, muscular woman, and her admitting defeat was anything but that. She was willing to fight for what she believed in, even if that meant risking her life. Vi was proud of her for that and vowed silently to forever be in her favor.

     After the woman collected her items and put on a few scraps of leather and gold armor on her arms and chest, they left the small apartment that Illaoi must have called home. Vi had located it after cornering Captain Fortune in a pub a few streets down.

    It had been 5 days since Vi last saw (y/n), and she didn't dare think about the possibilities of torture, of death, that have been plaguing her little love. She seethed, gritting her teeth and choking down the lump in her throat. She would not cry, not here, not now. Not while she needs to be strong.

    Illaoi led her down a few wary streets, venturing down a few blocks from where they started. They ended up at some old rotting docks, the boards broken and falling into the stinking sea beneath them.  

    "That boat house, down at the end. That is where Kench and his men do their biddings. I will not proceed, but I will be here, waiting. Yell if you need me, and I will come to you. I will help you, for the sake of defeating Kench."

    Vi merely nodded, her fists clenching within her gauntlets as she strode towards the decrepit building. The place smelled this shit, like him, and she was not happy about the concept that (y/n) may be here somewhere. 

    The thought rattled her, that she could be a mere few feet away and Vi wouldn't even know. She silently begged the gods that she was here, simply so that she could rescue her as soon as possible.

    Approaching the large rusted doors, Vi didn't care about silently entering. She slammed through them with her gauntlets, making the whole building shake as the door shattered in front of her. She stomped in, over the broken wooden splinters littering the floor. Across the warn concrete floor, there was a table of cronies playing cards and shooting shit with each other. They all looked up in unison, gaping at Vi before everything broke into chaos. 

    Two of them approached her, unsheathing sharp twisting blades and stalking in her direction. Vi cracked her neck and rolled her shoulders, and snarled as she began stalking towards her. 

    The one on the right lashed out, and she quickly parried it by bringing her massive metal fists up and smashing it against its body, making it fly to the wall beside them. It slunk to the ground, grunting with no appearance that it was going to stand. The second one ran at her, and she turned 45 degrees to her right, launching her fist into the creature's face. A sick crunching sound reverberated through the building, and it fell to the ground before her. 

    It held its nose and whimpered slightly as Vi lent down to grasp its dirty hole ridden shirt. She lifted it, her face a mere inches from her own.

    "Where is she?" She snarled.

    "I don't know who you're talking about," the creature snickered back. She could tell it was lying and that made her even more feral.

    "I will cut out your tongues and feed them to your cowering brothers," she threatened, pointing at the two others who were running towards a door in the back of the building. 

    A door she hadn't noticed before. A door she was sure led to the very captor she was looking for. 

    She shoved the monster to the ground, and it grunted on impact as she raised her fist again and punched his face into the ground. When she stood, the creature did not stir. She wasn't sure if it was dead or not, but she didn't care. The other that she had fought was still on the other side of the huge room, its body slouched against the base of the wall.

   Quiet, almost silent screams echoed below Vi's feet.

   She's here. She's here. She's here.

    Vi stormed towards the back of the room, slamming into the door. Those fuckers locked it, she thought. She didn't hesitate for a second as she brought back her fist and slammed it into the iron door. It didn't move but a smidge, and so she hit it again, and again. Finally, the bolts broke from their spots and the door shot open, not falling off of its hinges. A musty, sodden smell drifted up the stone stairs that Vi stood atop of. 

    Another scream echoed through the chambers below, this time much louder than before. She could hear shuffling, and the sounds of grunting as she assumed whoever was screaming was being dragged away.

    She cascaded down the steps, now more alert to her senses as the darkness encompassed her being. She wanted to be quiet enough so that they didn't know exactly where she was. They already knew she was here.

    She listened for more sounds, more grunting, more anything. Silence ensued, so she began walking down the dimly lit hallway. She noticed immediately the small iron gated rooms surrounding her. Each had a small sad bed on the floor. Some, there were bones and blood, others were empty. She reached the end of the stretch where another hallway collided with this one, making a T shape. The very last room she peered into before veering down to the left caused her to stop in her tracks.

    There, in the middle of the room, as if left as a sign for her and her alone was her jacket. Her dark red jacket she took from one of the first people she encountered in Zaun after getting out of prison.

     She was here. Vi could hardly hold back the vomit that threatened to rise in her throat, as she scanned the little stone room. From top to bottom, she could sense that she had been kept in here. Various plates were strewn across the room, rotting food sat on a few of the plates and she grimaced at the thought of (y/n) being forced to eat that trash. Gods know what it was.

    Right before she went to continue on her hunt, she heard another blood curdling scream, before a familiar voice yelled-

    "Vi? Vi! Please, anyo-," a grunt sounded from that voice, as if being punched in the stomach to quiet her pleas. White hot rage flooded Vi at the thought of someone touching and hurting her girl. Hers. 

    She zig zagged through a few more halls, before descending a small staircase and bursting through a door that she could hear a ruckus coming out of. The sounds; crying, cursing, and heavy breathing. Vi had to momentarily shield her eyes as brightness flooded her vision. As they adjusted, she took in her surroundings quickly. 

    There, in the middle of the room, bound to a chair and gagged, was a beaten and bloody (y/n). Her eyes widened at the sight of Vi, and she whimpered, pulling lightly at her restraints. Vi started towards her, her only inclination to free her immediately. At her first step, she heard (y/n) yelling through the gag, her eyes widening and her head shaking vigorously. Vi took another step, and (y/n) closed her eyes and screamed into the gag. Only then did Vi realize there was a crony behind her, using her as a meat shield with a knife to her back. 

    "Well, well, well," a familiar voice boomed. Vi didn't flinch as Tahm Kench emerged from a shadowed room to the far right that she hadn't noticed before. "It's a pleasure, as always, Vi."

    "Free her, Kench. Now." Vi ordered. It merely offered a chuckle in response.

    "For a price, child. Everything comes with a price."

     "What do you want?" Vi pleaded. She did not plan to go through with anything, other than to get (y/n) as far away from here as possible.

     "Your girlfriend here told me a lot about you. About your connections to the one they call Jinx?" Panic flooded her momentarily, and she glanced at (y/n) who only sobbed, her head sagged to her chest. She knew (y/n) was strong and must have endured a lot to say anything. "Although, she wouldn't tell us anything else. About your dealings in Piltover. Pity, if she had cooperated, I would have offered her a clean, easy death. But they never do, do they Vi?"

     She shuttered at the thought and burst out of her stance towards kench. She stopped dead in her tracks when 10 other creatures came out of the shadows. Fuck, she thought. She knew Kench could, and would fight too, but she didn't know his moves, what to expect. Thinking for a moment, she knew what she had to do.

    She leaned back her head, and as loud as humanly possible she yelled, "ILLAOI!"

    A quiet tense aura shifted the place, each of the creatures looking back and forth at one another. A minute passed before Vi cursed again, and a few of them laughed. 

    "Illaoi? That is how you found us, huh?" Tahm smirked, a hint of distaste lingering in his tone. "She wouldn't dare come down here and face me, not for the like of you."

     Just as he finished his sentence, Vi felt the heavy presence of Illaoi's spiritual bonds to the Kraken. The air shifted into a heavy, haunting, foreboding feeling. She turned around, just in time to see the massive woman breach the threshold of the room. She glowed slightly, Vi realized then, and her power was emanating through her and rippling through her room. 

    Illaoi did not hesitate as she approached Kench. All of his cronies seemed to cower in her powerful presence. 

    "Release the girl, Kench," She stated plainly. 

    "You do not understand what you are doing, woman," Tahm said, sounding slightly afraid. Even the great demon cowered in her presence. Vi made note not to fuck with Illaoi. 

     "I suppose you are going to do this the hard way," She mocked. She must have been closer than I thought. Suddenly, all around the room, large green spirit like tentacles rose from the floor, flapping mindlessly left and right. Illaoi glanced back at Vi, "Take her, and come help me kill these scum." 

    Vi did not hesitate as roaring combat erupted around her. Her primary focus was (y/n). She stormed over to her, immediately ripping the binds of the gag off of her face. She threw it to the floor and leaned down, making quick work of the bindings around her arms and legs. (y/n) quietly sobbed and looked up through her wet, blood-matted hair at Vi.

--- 🖤🖤🖤---

(Y/N)

    You couldn't stop crying. Not now, not here. Not while Vi knelt in front of you looking entirely panicked and you couldn't move an inch. Every part of your body ached, and you felt weak from blood loss. You didn't flinch, though, as Vi delicately looped one arm under your legs and the other around your back and carried you towards the stairs. She set you down, on the steps, far enough away to keep you safe, but close enough to be able to monitor you. 

   "I've got you, baby. I've got you," She brushed a hand lightly over your bruised face, and you winced from her touch. The color drained from her face, and she looked utterly defeated as she stood. "I have to help Illaoi, don't move." You almost, almost, laughed at that. As if you could move if you wanted to. You were so weak, so frail. 

    Maybe she would teach you how to fight, when this was all over with. You watched her as she turned her back to you, descending the few steps she had gone up. You could see through the doorway the hell that had broken lose. Illaoi had made quick work of the monsters that worked for Kench, the tentacles becoming solid and slamming into them, crushing the majority under their weight. Blood splattered the walls, screeches echoed until all was silent. The only remaining contender was Kench. 

    Before you, Illaoi shot out what appeared to be a tentacle, much smaller than all the others, towards kench. Before it could reach him, a giant hole summoned below the monster, and he jumped into it. You gasped, then grimaced from that pain it caused your body. Suddenly, you heard a wet thud from above you. 

    You didn't dare look behind you, you knew who it was already.

    "You have caused me quite a bit of trouble, child," he said, his stubby arms wrapping around you. You let out a scream, guttural and otherworldly, as you grabbed the knife that was still attached to your thigh. It had gone unnoticed, or more likely, they hadn't bothered to care simply because you were a weak little human. 

    Slashing backwards, pure adrenaline made the pain subside slightly as your blade coursed through the thick skin of Tahms face. He let out a disgusting screech, dropping you. Your body rolled aimlessly down the stairs, and you could feel a snap as your arm landed beneath you. You let out a scream and saw Vi and Illaoi running towards you. Through your tears, and the encroaching darkness that was shrouding your vision, you noticed that Tahm was no longer at the top of the stairs.

    Before you lost consciousness, you saw the woman fall to her knees beside you, carefully adjusting your body and arm. Relentless pain tugged at your sanity.

    "(Y/N), baby, I've got you. I've got you. Let's go home." you heard her voice say faintly. Her tear ridden and bloody face was the last thing you saw before you lost consciousness. 

PART TWELVE- Encouragement

  Your eyes flutter open, and for a moment you are flustered. You do not recognize your surroundings, and you scramble up against the headboard of the large bed you realize you rest upon. Panting, you clutch the covers to your chest, your clean chest. After a moment, you also notice the pain.

    You yell out in pain, and quickly clamp a hand over your mouth.  Before the panic could set in, the door at the furthest left-hand corner of the room swings open. 

    At the threshold, Vi stares at you with wide eyes, panting as if she had sprinted to the room. For a brief moment, you were in shock. Vi let out a soft sigh of relief as she began walking over to you.

    You did not mean to, but you shrank from her. The experiences of the last week were still haunting your very being. She stopped in her tracks.

    "Baby, you're at my house. You're safe now," Vi said in a cool tone. Her hand was put up out in front of her as if to further reassure your safety with her gesture. It didn't take more than a second for tears to begin falling down your cheeks, cascading down your neck and onto your chest under the shirt you wore. 

    As Vi walked to the bed and sat on the edge, she placed a hand on your knee. You did not flinch away from her touch as you did when she was walking toward you. Instead, you let your head fall back against the headboard and let out a pitiful sigh through your sobs.

    "It hurts, Vi," was all you could muster. You hated sounding so pathetic, but the state your body was in was not one to argue. Vi nodded, and reached her hand up to your face, caressing it far more gently than she ever had before. In that moment, the only thing you could think of to say was, "What is your favorite color?"

    She looked slightly taken aback, one eyebrow raised in curiosity. "It's red."

    You smiled slightly.

    "What is your favorite food?"

    "Um... don't make fun of me, but bar food?" she laughed, lowering her head in embarrassment. 

     "Where do you...escape to?" you said lightly, your gaze landing on her own piercing one. You twiddled your thumbs as she looked at you as if studying what she was seeing. She looked away, out the square window that, to your surprise, had sunlight seeping through. 

     "I used to leave for stretches of time after getting out of prison. Usually for odd jobs here and there." She looked back at you before she continued. "There is this place here in Piltover, where the trees surround a small lake close to the border of the undercity." She swallowed. "When I got out, I had... a relationship with an officer of one of the Council leader's daughters. They hated me, thought I was scum of the earth.

    I would leave Cait's house and wander the streets as if I knew where I was going. No matter where I went, people gave me dirty looks. They knew who I was. What I was. But when I found that place where the grass was green and the only noise was birds chirping and leaves rustling in the trees, I knew I had found my safe space.

    That was, of course, until I met you."

     You could feel your chest tightening, your heart aching for the harsh treatment she had received from people that didn't know her just because of where she came from. Where you both came from. 

    "When I met you, it felt like something clicked inside of me. Like a missing puzzle piece had gone into place. Even when I was throwing a fit in that alley way unsure of who you were. When I looked into your eyes in that moment, it felt like we were meant to be there. I was supposed to meet you. Every time thereafter that I saw you and you laughed, I felt that same feeling as I had at the lake. I felt safe."

     Tears that had dried on your face became wet again as new ones began tumbling down your cheeks. "Vi..." you whimpered; your mouth downturned in a far too dramatic that's so sweet type of look. "I feel the same way about you, too." You tried pushing off the headboard but hissed in a breath as a shooting pain traveled through your torso. Your arm, luckily, had been put back into place as you were unconscious. It no longer hurt aside from minor aching.

    Vi stood, and leaned over you so that her shadow covered your famished frame. Bending her neck, she raised her hand and lifted your chin ever so slightly with a single finger. Her lips pressed against yours so gently. It was as if she was ensuring that she would not break you. 

    "I am going to go downstairs and grab you something for the pain. You have two options, a remedy from a medic or booze."

    You let out a slight chuckle, and replied, "I think it would be smart to take a remedy this time."

    After a few minutes of observing the room you were in while she fetched the pain reliever, you came to the conclusion that this was her space. Her familiar (now quite destroyed) red jacket was thrown over the back of a black chair in the corner of the room. You could see spools of white wrapping on a desk that rested in front of a large rounded window, looking over what you presumed to be the city.

    "Here you go," Vi said, startling you slightly as she re-entered the room with food and a small bottle of red liquid. "This does not taste or smell great, please don't smell it like you smelt the shit on the ship." She sat beside you once again, popping open the small vile and handing it over to you. You hesitated, almost smelling it before reaching your other hand up and plugging your nose. Throwing your head back as you drank, you sank it back like a shot of whiskey. "Good girl." was all she said in response. You melted at her praise, feeling heat rise to your cheeks. She snickered, no doubt noticing your reaction.

    "Patience, baby. Once your better I am never letting you leave my room."

    "Promises, promises," was all you said in reply as a sly smile spread across your face.

PART THIRTEEN (FINAL)- Peace

- Spicy -    

It has been a few weeks since your expenditure with Tahm Kench. Vi had not lied for the most part, she had not let you leave her side even once after having rescued you. No matter where you went or what you did, she was with you.

    "(Y/N)," Vi said, lying next to you on her large bed. She lay on her side, resting her head on a hand and twirling absentmindedly fiddling with a piece of your hair with the other. "You feelin' okay today?"

     You nodded in response, turning your head away from your book to peer down at her. "Yeah of course babe, why?"

      "After everything, I just want to make sure you're okay. Like... mentally?" She gazed at you with concern lingering on her face, but as if she was trying to hide it. 

      Contemplating for a moment, you weren't entirely sure. You were certainly glad to be here, but it felt so sudden. Like all of these things had happened so out of the blue. The momentum of your life had been completely overturned, and the experiences of the last few months had certainly changed the way you think about things.

    "Honestly... I don't know. I am not scared, but I am not at peace. Do you know what I mean?" You looked at Vi as you talked with your hands. She nodded knowingly in response. "I am just glad I am out of that place, and we don't have anything to worry about. Plus, I feel a lot better physically which definitely helps."

    "Good. Do you want to go to that place I told you about? By the lake?" 

     You recalled the place that Vi had told you about being her hide-away location. Her peace. 

    "I would love that." You replied with a smile.

--- 🖤🖤🖤 ---

     Vi had given you a light sweater to wear, as spring had just arrived and although it was warmer than during the winter the wind was still crisp as it ran across your skin. 

    Walking through the streets of Piltover, you didn't care to look back at the gawkers and whisperers. You held Vi's hand in yours and felt like the most powerful woman in the world standing next to her. She did not look anywhere aside from ahead, and occasionally over at you to give a faint smile. 

    Approaching the end of a neighborhood road, the sidewalk curved around with a tall fence guarding from what lay beyond- the forest. You looked over at Vi and raised a brow.

    "Am I supposed to climb that?"

    She laughed, "My love, there are some obstacles you must overcome before you get to where you want to be."

    Although she was right, you still let out a prominent sigh and rolled your eyes to the heavens. She laughed again, bright and vibrant sounds radiating through your skin and bones. You approached the fence, using your fingers and boots to push you up, up, up and over the top. You took a moment at the top, looking over the small road you had come from. No one was watching, and you were thankful that no one was going to see you struggle with such a simple physical activity.

     "You ever going to come down?" Vi urged, shocking you from your revery. 

     "If I fall, will you catch me?" You said in response, nervous flutters racing through your chest. It was ridiculous, as it was only a few feet off of the ground. It felt like a hundred.

     "Always." She responded, looking you dead in the eyes. You sighed again, slowly turning your body and descending the opposing side of the fence. Once you nearly reached the bottom, you jumped off the last ten inches and turned to face Vi.

    "You have got to help me get into shape, honestly," You smiled, huffing out breaths. 

     After a tad bit of banter, the two of you continued walking. A thick line of trees sat ahead of you, a sweet whisper of pine lingering in the air. Vi released your hand and began walking forward, beckoning you to follow. You stepped in line behind her as she pushed branches aside and followed a path only known to her.

     "Here it is," Vi said, holding back another branch and stepping back as if revealing the area to you. You stepped forward, gawking at your surroundings as Vi stepped up behind you. 

     "Oh my Gods, its..." You started. You couldn't even find the words. A small meadow filled with Lavender, Honeysuckle, Tulips, and various other flowers rest in front of you. The breeze made gorgeous floral scents waft over to you, instantly relaxing your mind and muscles. A few feet ahead, you could see a round pond littered with lily pads. Across from the pond, the trees finished the circle encompassing the area. It really was a secluded paradise.

    "I know, right?" Vi smiled, looking longingly at what lay ahead. She grabbed your hand gently and pulled you with her as she began walking. "Over here there is a perfect place to lay down and look at the stars at night, if you want to stay long enough to do that."

    You nodded sheepishly, feeling honored to be taken to her sacred place. As you reached the flat plane of grass that looked almost manicured compared to the rest of the space, she sat down. Gently she tugged your hand to follow suit.

   Sitting in silence, you rested your head on her shoulder and looked across the water. It was crazy that all of these things had happened in the span of a few months. Meeting Vi, meeting her sister Jinx, getting kidnapped and tortured... All to lead to this place, next to this woman, who you could not deny you were falling undeniably in love with.

   "What are you thinking about, sweet stuff?" Vi murmurs, looking over at you with her head tilted as she lifts your chin with a finger. Your gaze meets hers and you take in her beauty. The small scar that sits on her pink lips, the jewelry in her nose. Her hardened eyes softening only for you. 

    "I think..." You start, pausing to suck in a shaky breath, "I think I'm in love with you, Vi."

     She looks taken aback, her eyebrows raising, and she blinks a few times. You feel heat rise to your cheeks before she smiles sweetly at you. Relief floods you when she responds.

     "I think, sweet stuff, that I may just love you, too." Her hand moves to your cheek, cupping your face. You lean into it, closing your eyes for a moment and inhaling deeply. When you open them, you meet her gaze. Her eyes have heated, lids lowering. As she gazes and you through her lashes, she runs her teeth over her bottom lip. "You know... I think you feel better enough that we can consummate our love... the good ol' fashioned way." She sniggers, raising a brow and tilting her head the other way. 

     "I suppose there is," You reply, trying to sound sultry even though you have no idea what you're doing.

    She giggles at your attempt, leaning in close. Your foreheads touch, and for a moment the two of you just sit there basking in each other's presence. You can feel her eyes on your lips, and instinctively you lick them. She lets out a small growl, moving her hand to the base of your neck and pulling you in. Her lips brush yours slightly, and a sigh escapes you. As your lips part, she enters you with her tongue. The two of you kissing passionately, she slowly lays you backward on the grass you sat upon. 

    Vi wants to cater to you, to love you. She wants you to feel special, but you can tell that there is something else urging her to go faster. She is ravenous to taste you, it seems, as she quickly trails down your body and pulls the pants down that you are wearing. You nearly reach down to cover yourself, but she snaps her gaze up to your own with an intensity so fierce you can't help but feel obliged to let her move forward. 

    Leaning your head back on the grass, your breathing intensifies as you feel her breath brush against your bare skin. The feeling of being out in the open, in the wild, is exhilarating. You had never experienced anything like this, and you are more than happy to be doing it with her. 

    Deep in thought, you intake a sharp breath of air as you feel her flat tongue lick you from your opening up to your clit. The world slows, but she speeds up. Your eyes roll back into your head as you reach out a hand a clasp her hair. She lets out a satisfied groan.

    "Fuck, baby. You look so fucking hot when I am pleasing you," Vi says quickly, returning to what she was doing. You feel one of her hands travel down your side, past your thigh and to your center. She pauses briefly as she adjusts herself and inserts a finger into you. Vi curves it up, flicking that spot perfectly, making little breathy moans escape your lips as she continues licking and worshipping your clit. 

    "Vi... Vi I'm gonna...", you start to say, and she looks up at you, breathing against your pussy only to pause for a moment.

     "Look at me while you cum, Princess," She urges, returning to that spot. You look down at her, and as she consumes you, you see her eyes meet your own, and you explode into a million pieces. You can't help it, falling back and bucking your hips against her face. She doesn't stop savoring the moment, until you use the hand that was once clenched in her hair to gently stop her.

    She smiles, a feline smile as she retreats from your throbbing pussy. You're panting heavily, and she crawls up your body. You think she is going to kiss you, but she brings the hand that she was fingerbanging you with to your mouth. You reach out your tongue and suck your juices off of her finger, and watch as she inhales and closes her eyes. 

    Using all of the strength you can muster, you grab her wrist and pull her to the side. As she falls over, you giggle maniacally and crawl on top of her. She laughs out loud as if shocked you got the upper hand for even just a moment. 

     "Now, Vi, let me return the favor? This love... it isn't one sided." Before she can open her mouth to protest, you lean down and kiss her long and hard, letting your right-hand trail down her neck, her breasts, until it brushes over a nipple. She gasps, and you can't help but marvel in the fact that she is sitting here beneath you. Vi looks so stunning, a blush creeping into her cheeks. Her blue eyes are hooded, never leaving your own.

     You lean down, unzipping her jacket as you go. You let it fall to the sides of her torso, and slowly caress her bare stomach underneath her white tank top. You pull it up and up until her chest is exposed to you. You had often wondered what she would look like here, as you hadn't gotten the opportunity to see yet. But she was perfect. Her breasts were not big but not small, cute little pink buds were hard as the breeze and most certainly her arousal enticed them. You bit your lip, before leaning down and taking one into your mouth. Swirling around it, sucking, and releasing it with a pop. You turned your attention to the other and did the same thing. 

    After you were satisfied that she was feeling positively enchanted, you trailed soft kisses down her stomach, stopping at the hem of her pants. You hooked a finger in one of the belt loops and looked up at her expectant gaze. In this moment, you recalled the first time she did this to you.

    "Is this okay?" You smiled, and she smiled back. She must have also remembered what she said to you that night on the ship.

     "More than okay, Sweet stuff," she said, no louder than a whisper. 

    You took no time in removing her bottoms, her panties, and marveling at her beautiful pussy. She was so wet, glistening. The thought that you were what caused her intense arousal made you proud. You had no mercy in your fucking her. The love flowed through you and your tongue against her clit until she was crying out your name. You had never heard her sound like that before, so sensual, so free.

    After you were finished, you both got your clothes back on. Vi rested her head on an arm as her back pressed against the grass, and you climbed up and onto her chest. Mainly, the two of you were looking at the stars.

    "I guess we get to look at the stars, after all," She smiled, and you glanced at her in awe.

    "If it's with you, I will do anything." You shifted onto your stomach, resting your chin on her chest so your face was directed at her. "Because after everything we have been through, I have come to realize that you're my escape, too. You're my home."

     Vi stretched down, tears threatening to leak from her eyes. You rose up slightly, to accommodate the space between the two of you and shared a pleasant, soft and loving kiss.

    You realized, in that moment under the stars, that there was nothing you would ever change about the past. And that the future, no matter what it could bring, would always be better than it could of been before if you were with her.

    Your home. 

------  🖤🖤🖤 ------      THE END      ------ 🖤🖤🖤 ------

[averagejoesolomon]

We made it, friends. Welcome to the final installment of Full Circle: 1986. It has been an absolute delight sharing this one with you. It is a downright gift to finally be able to commit this all to paper, after having been in my head for probably close to a decade now. This will probably be the last Full Circle chapter until ~November/December. I know this is longer than usual, but I've finally finished an original manuscript, and I'm going to take an honest shot at publishing it this fall. I so appreciate your patience while I follow that dream. I'll be back as soon as I can with more of Full Circle. There may be some surprises in the meantime (ahem—Listen Series 10-year anniversary), but as always, I can't wait to share what comes next. Those of you doing some math may have already realized we have a very familiar face coming in 1988 👀🍼 Until then, please enjoy. If you're new here, you can read all of Full Circle on Ao3.

Chapter Fourteen

“You’ve got to be goddamn kidding me.”

Joe Solomon can find a way to hide in just about every environment on earth. Anywhere he goes, he’s the figure at the back of the bar, the shadow at the end of the street, the ghost sitting in a blind spot security swears they don’t have. His face is never caught on camera. His name is never on any lists. If there’s darkness around, you can bet Joe’s managed to sink into it. Maybe it’s his New York roots, or old foster kid habits, or Blackthorne training he can’t quite shake, but one thing’s for sure—if Joe don’t want to be found, there’s not a soul on earth who can find him.

But something about the gray-speckled walls of Langley’s third floor draws him out, as though this place was designed to expose all the secrets it collects, starting with men like him. Of course, the hollering doesn’t help either. “Look at yourself.”

Matt turns just in time to see Joe barrel scowl-first down the hall. “Joe,” Matt says, smile wide and welcoming. “Nice to see you up and walking again.”

“Don’t start,” he barks. “You made me stay home, meanwhile you looked like this?”

Joe’s still got a slight limp to his gait, but that’s not much compared to the laundry list of fresh injuries Matt’s working with. He’s officially lost all leverage in this argument. “To be fair,” he says, trying his luck anyway, “I’ve only looked like this for the last 48 hours.”

Joe closes the distance between them, but his voice still stays at that same outraged level. “What the hell happened to you?”

This particular question can’t be answered in the lobby of Director Smith’s main office, which is almost certainly monitored by folks outside of their extremely limited task force—if not bugged by less friendly players. With one look, Matt’s able to tap into their shared shorthand and convey caution. “Details later.”

Joe catches the hint, even if he doesn’t look happy about it. He scans Matt up and down in that even, no-nonsense sort of way Joe scans everything. His voice drops to Matt’s level when he grumbles, “You just get to have all the fun, I guess.”

“If it helps,” Matt says, “I don’t remember most of it.”

“Jesus,” Joe sympathizes. “Would you at least sit down, already? It hurts just looking at you.”

The two of them usually share the same stick-straight posture, a habit leftover from their Army days that proves impossible to break. Joe’s wearing it now, softened over the years, but still there. The subtle draw of his shoulders. The top-to-bottom stacking of his spine. When Matt tries to mimic it, he comes up against the strain in his ribs and curls right back up. He hasn’t been able to pull himself upright since his third helicopter across the Alps, and Joe’s presence ain’t gonna change that, even if Joe’s always made him feel just a little bit invincible. “If I sit down,” says Matt, “I’m not gonna be able to stand back up.”

Joe’s jaw grinds. “I told you I’d get on a flight—”

Matt says, nice and easy, “And I told you I had it handled.”

“You’re never going solo on one of these things again.”

“I didn’t go solo. I had Rachel, and Rachel had a whole team.”

This ain’t much of a comfort in Joe’s book, and it shows. This is the same look Joe gives him anytime Rachel gets mentioned—and as it so happens, it’s also the same look Rachel gives him anytime Joe gets mentioned. Matt’s got no clue how the two most observant people he knows can be this blind to their own similarities. 

No doubt Joe’s got plenty to say when it comes to Rachel Cameron and her team, but he bites his tongue because good guys don’t bad-talk ladies when they’re not around to defend themselves. Instead, he keeps his frustrations broad. “It never should’ve gotten this close.”

“We’ve made some powerful enemies,” Matt says with a shrug. The movement aches, but no more than sitting, or standing, or breathing already does. “They were bound to get a couple hits on us one of these days.”

Joe gives him another surveying glance. “This is more than a couple.”

“It’s worse than it looks.”

“And they didn’t get hits on us. They got hits on you.”

Of all his hiding spots, Joe’s favorite is his own guilt. He retreats into it every chance he gets. Lingers in its shadow, sometimes for days at a time. Guilt is the thing that keeps Joe up at night and when he does finally fall asleep, guilt is the thing that brings him back to his feet, wandering down empty hotel halls well into the witching hour. Joe keeps a running list of sins in his head at all times, some small part of him always repenting for the orders he’s followed, the lies he’s told, the lives he’s taken, and a moment of weakness one Christmas Eve night when his own secrets finally became too heavy to hold all on his own. 

It’s constant, and Joe’s an old pro at finding new things to take the blame for. He’s doing it right now. Guilt that he wasn’t there to take his own beating. Guilt that Matt was.

This is all a load of hooey, according to Matt. A bunch of shame and remorse put there by the Circle of Cavan, because shame and remorse is exactly what turns Circle recruits into Circle agents. He’s said as much to Joe, but it’s never received well—doesn’t seem to help, anyway, so Matt focuses on something that will. “It’s worse than it looks,” he says again, and he meets Joe’s eyes this time. Lets the words settle how they need to for Joe to really believe it.  “Honest.”

Joe squints, assessing Matt with that sharp and attentive look he has. “Chrissake,” he finally sighs. “You lie to Soviet dignitaries with that mouth? Honestly Morgan, you’ve got a godawful tell.”

“Alright, so I’m gonna head down to the docs when we’re done here,” Matt admits. “But Joe, look at me. I’m fine. And if I’m not fine, then I’ll be fine.” Joe looks like he wants to protest and takes in a breath to do exactly that. But Matt’s in no shape for a fight right now, so he interrupts this one before it can even start. “Did you get to my safety deposit box while I was gone?”

This is a lot like asking if Joe got around to sleeping or eating while he was gone, which might be why Joe rolls his eyes. “You asked me to go,” he says, “so I went.”

“And?” Matt prompts.

Joe spots the change in subject, but Matt must look pitiful enough to let it slide. “Nothing,” he says. “No sign of a break-in—passport right where it was supposed to be.”

Matt’s heart drops into his battered gut, landing among the dread that’s been churning there for days. It takes every ounce of training he’s got to keep his face neutral, composed, when he lets out a matter-of-fact, “Huh.”

“Huh?” Joe presses. “What, huh?”

“One of my passports was in Moscow. Saw it with my own two eyes.” 

The lobby is empty around them, lined with unoccupied seats and filled with unread magazines. There’s no one to hide from. There’s not a sound to be heard. Not even the plant in the corner is alive, faded plastic leaves feeding off the fluorescents above. Even so, neither one of them risks a scene for fear that someone, somewhere is watching.

Joe’s words are quiet. Barely there. “If it wasn’t from your deposit box…”

“Someone at Langley is selling the passports they have on file,” Matt says. “And if we track them down…”

They don’t dare finish the thought aloud. They don’t have to. This has always been the endgame. The sole objective Director Smith gave them years ago, back when Joe still had an allegiance to the Circle and Matt didn’t know the name Ioseph Cavan. Find the moles, protect the agency, and save Joe’s reputation in the process. All these years, they’ve been tracking Circle agents from the outside in, working with any informant they could to get back to a source at Langley. This may be their one and only shot at an internal investigation.

But Matt’s ribs twinge against his breath, and the timing reeks of a trap. After all these years of looking, they finally reach a breakthrough on this op days after he takes a beating designed to intimidate. Maybe it’s working, because Matt’s not so sure they should follow this one.  “Conversation for another time,” he hints. “We’ll talk when we get back to the apartment.”

And Joe doesn’t miss a trick. “There’s more?”

When it comes to the Circle, there’s always more. No one knows that better than Joe Solomon. “There’s no such thing as coincidence, right?” 

Joe nods. “Right.”

“Let’s just say,” Matt cautions, “I don’t think it’s a coincidence I was there.”

Matt keeps this theory vague on purpose, trusting Joe to decode the rest.  There’s a glint in his eyes as he runs the numbers and plays out every hypothetical. Joe may not have been in Moscow, but that doesn’t mean he can’t piece together what happened. “Jesus,” he spits, realization playing out in his features. “You think Rachel set you up?”

Well. That sure ain’t the conclusion Matt expected him to make. “What? No. God, no,” Matt sputters. They don’t have time to walk back the math on this particular miscalculation, so Matt cuts to the chase before Joe can go any further down that path. “But Joe, listen. I think Catherine might have.”

This has Joe running a whole new set of numbers through his head, pulling the corners of his mouth into a hard, stoic frown. “No,” he says, definite. “Not a chance. You’re sure it wasn’t Rachel—?”

“Morning, Joe.”

With timing too perfect to be accidental, Rachel chooses this moment to round the corner and join their conversation. She has a cup of vending machine coffee in each hand, steam still rising from the slim notches in each plastic cap. As she sips from one, she holds the other out to Matt, and he’s been awake for too many consecutive hours to decline. It ain’t Joe’s coffee, but it’ll do.

“Glad to see you’re feeling better,” she says, and Matt has to hand it to her—she’s got this way of making something perfectly pleasant sound like utter devastation. “I heard you’ve been indisposed as of late.”

Joe’s answering glance is aimed directly at Matt, a scathing pout from someone who ain't above using his highly specialized skill set on a girl, just as long as his best friend gives him permission first.

Matt replies with his own warning look and a placating, “Play nice.” To keep the game fair, he turns to Rachel too. “Both of you.”

“What the hell is she doing here?” Joe asks.

Matt throws a thumb in her direction. “Talk to Rachel, when you’re talking to Rachel.”

“Alright.” His eyes flash to her. “What the hell are you doing here?”

Rachel takes another sip of her coffee, entirely unruffled. “A pleasure, as always, Joe.”

Joe crosses his arms over his chest. Settles into a wider stance. “You’ll have to excuse me if I’m not at my friendliest,” he says. “It’s just that I gave Matt to you in pretty good shape, and you didn’t exactly return him in pristine condition.”

“All things considered, I’d say he’s in pretty excellent condition, actually.” She’s the cool and collected counter to Joe’s stinging emotion. “Despite your best efforts to put him in the ground.”

Joe huffs, a bull seeing red. “Excuse me?”

Matt physically steps between the two of them. “Alright,” he says. “A little civility, please. I’ll remind you both that there are plenty of things I need your help with, but getting myself into trouble ain’t one of them. If you wanna be mad at someone, you can be mad at me.”

They both look ready to follow through on that offer, so Matt holds out his hands in either direction. Before they can speak he says, “But you can’t be mad at me yet—I’m injured, remember? So, so very injured.”

Joe rolls his eyes and spits out a, “Chrissake,” at the same time Rachel says, “Oh honestly, Matthew.” The two of them seem to find some tentative common ground in their shared annoyance, temporarily refraining from any further bickering. That’s fine. Matt can be a common enemy for now. Maybe it’ll remind them that what they’ve actually got is a common friend. There may be hope for them yet.

He lowers his hands slowly, trying not to disturb the peace. “Rachel’s here on orders from the Director,” he explains, “on account of how she’s recently learned some new information.”

Joe deciphers this in a matter of seconds. “You told her?”

“What I could,” Matt confirms. “It was the only way to get her out of Moscow.”

For all his grumbling, Joe knows the same thing every spy knows—that Moscow is a desperate place in a desperate time, always calling for desperate measures. He won’t begrudge any decisions made within the city’s borders, because he knows firsthand how Moscow can wring a fella out and force him to find alliances in the damnedest places. 

So rather than holler any more than he already has, he turns to Rachel. Looks at her with a deadly serious intensity. “Then he must have told you that you’ve raised some flags?”

Rachel matches his gaze. “He did.”

“That these are dangerous people?”

“He said that too.”

Joe glaces at Matt, then lands back on Rachel one more time. He looks like he wants to hide, but instead he holds strong. “He told you that if you keep looking for them, they’re going to find you first?”

Guilt for pulling Matt into all this. Guilt for pulling in Rachel by proxy.

Rachel’s chin is in its usual place, high and strong. “I’m not afraid of making a few more enemies.”

“I’m not saying it to scare you,” Joe insists. “I’m saying it because it’s the truth, and because you’re smart enough to walk away while you still can.”

Joe Solomon can hide anywhere in the world, but there are some people not even he can hide from, even if he’s spent most of his adult life trying to do exactly that. His words lack all the signs of their usual squabbles, replaced by a man who has been running for as long as he can remember, and wouldn’t wish it on his worst enemy.

Rachel Cameron is not his worst enemy, but she knows their rivalry well enough to understand this must be important, if Joe’s decided to put it aside for now. She surrenders her own fight, just temporarily, and grants him a nod. “I’ll do what the agency asks of me,” she says. Then, with some consideration.  “What’s best for Matt. And I suppose, by association, that means I’ll do what’s best for you, too.”

Sometimes Matt forgets that Joe is older than Rachel, by just under two years. In damn near every aspect of espionage and beyond, the two are evenly matched. But right then, Joe’s experience weighs down his every feature and makes him look horribly, achingly old. When it comes to understanding the toll the Circle can take on a person’s soul, few people know more than Joe.

“Do whatever you want,” he says, letting his head fall into a shameful shake. “But just know, as soon as you walk in those doors, you aren’t making decisions for yourself. You’re making them for Abby and your dad. For any friends you have back in Baltimore. For any future family you might want to have someday. Because once these people find out you’re onto them, they won't just stop at you.”

The best way to send Rachel into an uneasy spiral is to dig up her sense of helplessness. It’s something Matt’s only just started to learn, but something Joe seems to have known for a while now, given how easily he leverages her own fears against her. There’s some irony to the idea that a manipulation technique Joe learned in the Circle is the only thing keeping Rachel out of it.

She glances at Matt, but it’s quick. Like she can’t quite help herself. It’s gone before Matt can decide what it means, hidden behind another sip of coffee. “Fine,” she says, bored as she wipes the corner of her lip with her thumb. “Anything else?”

Joe starts to answer one way or the other, but he doesn’t get the chance. They’re interrupted by a petite woman in a pencil skirt, emerging from the office at their backs. She peers over horn-rimmed glasses as she says, “The Director will see you now.”

Best not to keep the boss waiting.

Rachel straightens her shoulders and starts to turn, leading the pack. “Ladies first,” she reminds them both, looking distinctly Abby-like as she shoots a carefree smile over her shoulder.

Matt starts to follow, the way he always follows her lead, but Joe hooks a hand around his arm instead, keeping Matt planted in place. He waits until Rachel is out of earshot and then, in the most covert voice Matt’s ever heard from him, asks, “Are you sleeping with Rachel Cameron?”

Spy training or not, Matt feels a flush crawl up his neck, as fresh flashes catch along his breath. Rachel’s cool hand on his hot chest. Rachel’s moan in his mouth. “Am I—?” he sputters. “Am I sleeping with—?”

But Joe’s just got this look on his face. Cover blown. 

So Matt drops the act. They’ve talked about matters of national security with less urgency when he asks, “How did you know?”

Joe points to the coffee cup in Matt’s hand. “You hate vending machine coffee,” he says. “Which I know, because every time you drink it, you bitch and moan about how my coffee is better.”

“Your coffee is better,” Matt contests.

“And yet, you’re drinking hers,” Joe says. “And the only way you’d ever drink that shit is if you were—”

“Yeah.”

“So you are.”

“Yeah.”

“About time.”

This is so wildly off-base from the response Matt expects that he has to do a double-take. Make sure he heard right. “Wait,” he says. “What’s that supposed to—?”

“Are you boys coming, or what?”

Rachel pops her head around the doorway and Matt resists the completely unspylike urge to throw both hands over Joe’s mouth. “Yep,” he says. “Be right there.”

She retreats back to the office, and Matt turns back toward Joe. “Not a word.”

Joe holds up both hands in faux innocence. “My lips are sealed,” he says, but he’s biting back a grin, and Matt knows he hasn’t heard the last of this. “Now let’s get this over with. The sooner we get out of here, the sooner we can watch the Royals game.”

Matt really is having a hard time deciding how to feel about Joe, right this moment. “You taped the Royals game for me?”

Joe shrugs. “‘Course I taped the Royals game for you.”

But Matt forgives easy, and Joe’s easy to forgive anyway. “Joe Solomon,” he says, with a grin of his own. “Did you miss me?”

“Alright,” Joe drones. “Get in there, or I’m gonna tell you the scores.”

Matt does as he’s told, because it’s Joe telling him to do it. Plus, the woman with the glasses is tapping her heel in their direction. Even though Matt regularly squares up against arms dealers and armed guards, he's still not willing to tick off the Langley secretaries.

They file into the familiar beige and black office, ready to give their usual debrief and sort out which details should be committed to paper and which should be left to rot in the wind. This process is routine enough that it’s practically scripted, and Matt feels a certain sense of comfort in the repetition, even with Rachel’s presence. In fact, some part of him is relieved for her to finally see all this. To finally understand a part of his life that’s been kept from her for so long.

But the moment he enters the room, he realizes that Rachel ain’t the office’s only new addition.

Director Smith is tucked behind his desk, just like always, shuffling through a stack of paper that never seems to get any smaller, no matter how many times they visit. Like always, his black jacket hangs on the back of his chair and his tie is loose at the collar. He’s filled out the mustache he started growing a few years back, in an attempt to look more like Tom Selleck. He looks mostly the same as he always has, except where age and stress make him look a little more weary.

The man across from him is unfamiliar—at least, Matt thinks he is. But a second glance triggers some deep down certainty that they’ve met before, somewhere, sometime, when Matt was least expecting him. 

The Director looks up at them all. Smiles. “Ah, welcome home, boys,” he says, in his easy Virginian accent. “And Ms. Cameron. I’ve heard wonderful things.”

“Likewise, sir,” Rachel replies, always the perfect lady.

“How is your sister?” he wonders. “Bored to tears, I suppose.”

“And healing up just fine,” she says. “Which, I keep reminding her, is the important part.”

“Yes, well, as soon as she’s ready to go again, we’ll be happy to have her,” he says. “Send my best to her—and to your father, while you’re at it.”

“Will do, sir.”

The mystery man turns to face them head-on, and Matt gets that feeling again. It’s the eyes that strike him first, dark in a way that makes them look endless. Something about the cut of his jaw, the angle of his nose, the furrow of his brow. It all sends a surge of hot familiarity through Matt’s veins, landing like metal in his mouth.

“I’m eager to hear about your latest findings,” Smith goes on. “But first, I suppose you’ve all noticed we’re not alone.”

It’s the start of an introduction and the mystery man stands to meet it, buttoning the front of his jacket as he goes. His movements strike more familiarity into Matt, resonating at a single frequency in his bones.

“Trusting that you’re all able to keep a secret until the news is made official,” says Smith, with some humor, “I’d like to introduce you to the new Director of Operations for the CIA—Mr. Max Edwards.”

Max Edwards’ dark eyes settle onto Matt, holding a hand out to shake. Matt takes it with a flinch, hand still sore from fighting off memories he can’t remember. “Nice to meet you,” says Max, in low southern drawl just barely above a whisper. “Alexander has told me great things about this task force.”

Max moves on to the next hand, and it’s Joe who has the wherewithal to ask, “New, sir?”

Director Smith stands to join the rest of the room, rounding his desk and leaning against its front. “I’ve been called up the ranks, Mr. Solomon,” he says, arms crossing casually across his chest. “Come autumn, I will be serving as the Deputy Director of the CIA.”

“Congratulations,” says Rachel, sincerely.

“That’s great,” Matt mutters, distracted.

Leave it to Joe to ask, “What does that mean for—?”

Director Smith holds up a hand, already well ahead of Joe and not afraid to show it. “We will, of course, have some details to work out. Rest assured we will have time to do so, though I’d prefer not to speak in great detail with Ms. Cameron present.” He turns to Rachel. “No offense intended.”

“None taken,” Rachel replies. Her gaze meets Joe’s, one final debate between the two of them. She must let him win, because she turns back to Smith and says, “As I understand it, my involvement is better left at need-to-know.”

Matt should be relieved. He should be thankful that something Joe said got through to her. That she isn't pushing for more. That she won’t be the Circle’s next target, and that she won’t have to spend a lifetime in this fight. But he’s just too caught up in the way Max walks. In the way he speaks, and moves, and looks.

Smith nods in her direction. “Unfortunately, I believe that’s a wise decision,” he says. “While your skills would be more than welcome, I’m certain I don’t have to share that the consequences could be quite dire.”

“No sir,” Rachel agrees. “That’s been made clear.”

“Then we will save our discussion for another time,” he concludes.  “Until then, the only thing you three need to know is that I will no longer serve as your primary contact on this case. I simply won’t have the time. But I do still hope to stay involved, which is why I wanted to ensure I had someone I trusted in this position.”

All three of them turn to study Max, the man to be trusted. He stands tall. Confident. Certain that he is exactly where he is supposed to be.

“Mr. Edwards will train at my side in the coming months, learning the ins-and-outs of our objectives here,” says Director Smith. “Boys, you’ll be asked to pursue new leads as they come in—no different than before. Ms. Cameron, we’ll work closely with you on your upcoming reports to ensure we commit the correct details to paper. This is among my top priorities as I transition, and Max has expressed similar dedication.”

This all feels so critical and immediate. Matt wishes he could focus, but his brain is caught on repeat, trying to fill the Max Edwards sized hole in his head.

Max clears his throat. “Everything alright, son?” he asks Matt. “You look shaken.”

The set of his shoulders. The crease in his forehead. “I’m sorry sir, it’s just—” he starts, but he hesitates, worried he’ll sound foolish. The whole room watches him, waiting for an answer he ain’t sure about. “I can’t shake the feeling we’ve met before.”

A small sigh rises and falls in Max’s broad chest, something close to a laugh, although Matt can’t imagine this man ever laughing. Max glances toward Director Smith, who grants a permissive node, and Max holds his hands out, putting himself on full display. “You caught me,” he says, simply.  “You have seen me before. At the Bolshoi Theatre.”

With the Bolshoi as a background, Matt’s brain handily fills in the rest of the memory. A bag of passports in his hands, Townsend’s voice at his back, and a mysterious man looking up at him from the ground floor. That must be it. “You spotted us,” Matt remembers. “In the balcony. Before we ran.”

To Matt’s credit, Max didn’t look at all like himself in Moscow, done up in a disguise that relied on dark facial hair and heavy Russian garb. That must be why Matt couldn’t identify him on sight. “You were not too hard to spot, I’m afraid.”

This sounds like it could be a joke, but Matt’s not sure, so he replies in earnest, just in case. “Yes, well,” he says. “Moscow has a way of bringing out unexpected circumstances.”

“I’d like to hear more, when we have time,” says Max. “Learn how we can do better in the future.”

“Yessir.”

When Max Edwards smiles, a chill runs down Matt’s spine, and it must be left over from Moscow. From that feeling of having eyes on his back, and not trusting a single step he takes. It always takes a few days to shake off the Soviet Union and this is no exception. 

Matt meets Max’s eyes once more, and he's got this strange urge to hide. Slip into a crowd, the way he always does. Let the world dissolve at his back, then come up for air once its safe again.

But Max already found him once, back on a balcony in the the Bolshoi. Who's to say it couldn't happen again? Matt may be a natural Pavement Artist, but Max seems like the type who can see straight through anything. “Gentlemen,” Max says, clasping his hands together. “I think this is the start of a beautiful partnership.”

[yanfeiimain]

Snap Out Of It - Kaeya x m!reader.

cw: Angst, fluff, kinda hurt/comfort, heartbreak, drinking

Songfic - Snap Out Of It / Arctic Monkeys

a/n: I wrote this so long ago but kinda wanted it to get out... I'll focus on that aventurine series from now on probably! If you have requests - feel free ;)

Whats been happening in your world?

What have you been up to?

"Hello there, Traveller. What may you be up to?"

Kaeya greets you as you enter Angel's Share. He gives you his usual smirk, sipping on his wine. You sit down next to him and order something strong.

"Oh just drinking some thoughts away, saving this world's been rough." You answer dismissing.

Kaeya scans your face, reading the sadness in your eyes.

"It's been a while since I came to Mondstadt, care to-" "Who

broke your heart?" He interupts.

I heard that you fell in love, or near enough.

Your eyes widen in surprise and your heart stings. You're close to tearing up. "I came here to drink those thougts away, not think about them even more." You say, your tone bittersweet.

               

"C'mon traveller, tell me about it, it's gonna help," he tries to convince you to tell him. That was it. You started to sob. "Shut your stupid mouth, I never push you to tell me something," you cry. The waiter gives you your drink without a word. You take a sip. The alcohol burns in your throat, but it's worth it. Your boyfriend of two years cheated on you.

I gotta tell you the truth, yeah.

"Hey, Traveller, this is not like you." He tries to comfort you, but you only sob harder, the sorrows of the past month washing over you like heavy waves.

Snap out of it.

I get the feelin' I left it too late, but baby

I wanna grab both your shoulders and shake, baby...

Kaeya gently grabs your shoulders and hold you firmly. "Snap out of it. Traveller, I'm here. I care for you. I want you to be okay. So tell me what happened." His words reassure you. It doesn't stop your tears though. You can feel that he means well, but your heart is broken.

If that watch don't continue to swing

Or the fat lady fancies havin' a sing

"Hey, look at me" he says softly. Kaeya gently grabs your chin and forces you to look at him. You gasp and swallow to stop your sobs and he wipes your tears with his thumbs.

I'll be here waitin' ever so patiently

For you to snap out of it

"Focus on me, I'm here." You take deep breaths to calm down. Kaeya lifts you from your chair and places you on his lap. You hug him like he's the only pillar that keeps your heart from collapsing. And he hugs you back, holding you close.

Forever isn't for everyone

Is forever for you?

"I... thought we we're something that was gonna last. I thought we were happy together. But he cheated on me. He had a girl for 5 months. He told me he was gay. He told me he only ever loved men and found women not interesting." You sniffled. You truly thought he was that someone you were going to spend your life with.

It sounds like settlin' down or givin' up

But it don't sound much like you, girl

"Oh dear, I'm sorry. But if he treated you this way, you shouldn't feel sad for him leaving. You shouldn't shed a single tear for him. He isn't worth it," he whispers in your ear. The strokes your back.

I wanna grab both your shoulders and shake, baby

Snap out of it

I get the feelin' I left it too late, but baby

Snap out of it

"It's gonna be okay, I'm here. And I wish I would've been there with you in Sumeru. I wish I could've been the one that cared for you." His words soften your heart. Oh how you missed him. He was your best friend but you lost contact after travelling to Inazuma.

If that watch don't continue to swing

Or the fat lady fancies havin' a sing

I'll be here waitin' ever so patiently

For you to snap out of it

"But I'm here now. I'm here and I won't leave." Kaeya continues to comfort you. "You don't need to worry about him anymore, I'm here and you're safe with me. That's all that counts." He presses a soft kiss againts your forehead.

Under a spell you're hypnotized

Darlin', how could you be so blind?

"Why didn't I notice sooner..." you mumble to yourself. "I don't know, now stop worrying. We got this, okay? I'm here for you. I care for you." He says and gently ends the embrace, sitting you upright to face him.

I wanna grab both your shoulders and shake, baby

Snap out of it

I get the feelin' I left it too late, but baby

Snap out of it

"I need you, Traveller." Kaeya looks at you and cups your face.

"I love you," he confesses.

If that watch don't continue to swing

Or the fat lady fancies havin' a sing

Your eyes widen, your heart skips a beat.

"I understand if you don't feel the same way," he looks into your eyes.

I'll be here waitin' ever so patiently

"... but I'll be here for as long as you need. I'll wait."

For you to snap out of it.

[phosphorus-noodles]

4 and 17!

4 - How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Care to share one of them?

Ohh I was just thinking about this yesterday... I think four? My current wip + three other ones, all for the same series :3

17 - Do you write your story from start to finish, or do you write the scenes out of order?

It's pretty close to start to finish tbh ashdjfs- I worry about having a "consistent tone" a lot so anytime I go to write I first scan through everything I have already and do a little editing before I start writing. Every single time. So by the time I finish the last bit I've probably redone the first bit like six times lol. But I do sometimes do a few paragraphs out of order, or I'll have an idea for a later scene and will make a bullet point further down on my outline/draft, but I won't fully write it until later on when I get to it ^^

(Send me writing asks!)

[shoko-komi]

Weekly Komi Report - 19/07/23

I rise and I LIVE and my stomach... hurts (but in a good way)

Komi Can't Communicate can be read in the following places:

Viz Media (only in North America) or Mangakakalot for the official translation.

Mangadex for scanlations (shoutout to Mylene Scans who recently picked up the series)!

So... I've really got to stick just to key moments jasndjas. The last report, I was a hair's breadth away from sharing the entire chapter with the only comments being "ajsndjsasdajksdn" and "AAAAAA".

I will continue to do this probably.

Picking up right where we left off at the end of the last chapter!!! I praised Oda for his choice to have their kiss be an intimate and private moment away from us the audience, but oh ho ho! Having our cake and eating it, too.

Commence with the anxiety meltdown! They are so alike asjdajosd

my man is having an out of body experience.

That looks like a thought, but I want to imagine he's screaming this aloud. Full lung blasting that proclamation into the rain and disturbing the nearby houses. This above is the Viz translation, but Mylene Scans has him saying "love"

Both are good imo

I'll skip their conversation about whether that was their first kiss or their second. It's really good but... I'm trying not to share the entire chapter asjdnaksjldnjka

Huh?

WUH???

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

SHE KINDA LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!!!

Tomohito Oda never misses. Except for when he does. But when he doesn't, he doesn't. And he usually doesn't. This time, he didn't. My brain is overtaxed.

See you next week!

[fushipurro]

Lessons in Love

Chapter 1 - Matchmaking

Masterlist | Next Chapter ->

☆ Synopsis: Tasked with turning your novel series into a romance, your imagination can only go so far before your lack of experience gets in the way. You turn to a dating app to try and solve this, only to meet rejection after rejection.

That's when you met him.

☆ Content: 18+ MDNI, f!reader, mma!Toji, jjk AU, petnames, foreplay (nipple and vaginal play), creampie, biting/sucking/hickies, tongue action/cunillingus, age gap (10 years)

☆ Word Count: 6.1k

"sorry, but I don't think this is gonna work out."

these were the words you heard date after date, everything seeming so fine in the beginning until you bring up your novel woes and then they don't want to deal with the troublesome baggage affecting their twisted one night fantasies.

"UGH I'm never going to get these stupid chapters done with before my deadline. why did I think this was such a good idea; actually why did I let you talk me into this?"

"It's okay, y/n, I'm sure it'll work out soon. are you sure you can't just BS it from some porn and move on?" your roommate, satoru, questioned. the two of you were enjoying some takeout together as usual since your latest date didn't even last before the entrees came out. the two of you have been friends since high school and eventually became roommates together alongside your other shared friend, suguru.

"hell no, I finally have a good thing going with my publisher and I need this to be perfect and actually feel organic. you'd think someone from the last ten dates would've been willing since I'm practically on my knees begging..." you pouted, sinking deeper into your chair, "guess there's something wrong with me."

"nonsense, you're probably just not giving it enough time or just bad at begging, just keep at it. suguru and I are going to the downtown jujutsu gym later for an mma match they're hosting. you're welcome to tag along and show off some more of how desperate you are to the plenty of other dudes showing up."

your eyebrows furrowed, "ha ha, very funny" which gave satoru a good laugh.

"hey I'm only trying to help, even if you don't meet anyone there, you still have a week until your deadline, no?"

"jee, thanks for reminding me," letting off a frustrated sigh, "but fiiine~ i'll come with you guys, least with you two I can actually make it through one 'date' without being ditched."

satoru shot up out of his chair and shouted to your other roommate who was still getting ready, "yo, suguru! y/n said she'll come with us!"

the trio arrived at the gym together, it was a chilly night and you were all bundled up together, hot drinks in hand as you entered the building.

"thanks for making the drinks, suguru, it's fucking colder in here than outside!" Shivering in your jacket, the pair laughed as they sat down on the bleachers for prime viewing.

"sooo, y/n, see anyone interesting yet to beg to?"

you shot satoru a glare, to which he responded by jokingly patting your back as suguru gave a friendly sigh.

"satoru, we only just got here and from the looks of it, well, there's mainly just women here tonight." suguru had begun to scan the room alongside you while satoru was eyeing up some of the fighters entering the ring. "i'm sure the place will fill out come the main event."

for the first few matches, you seemed glued to the dating app on your phone, checking if anyone nearby came up as a match, swiping away, but such luck though with any pairings.

"oi oi, you may as well just turn that off and pay attention to the matches. maybe you can convince your editor to drop the romance?"

"but i can't─" before even waiting for your reply, satoru took your phone and shoved it into his pocket leaving you with only the drink in your hand, "hey, give that back!"

"not a chance, you gotta watch these next few matches, it's why suguru and I wanted to come here in the first place."

"okay, you win, satoru. like i said last week, i'm not against the romance aspect, even if it isn't quite what i imagined my story to end up as but─"

"yeah yeah, you got no experience and perfectionist problems, you'll work it out."

sighing, you sunk yourself deeper into your hot drink and faced back towards the arena. the following couple fights featured some well built men with decent looks, satoru and suguru were cheering as they discussed the techniques being used and predicting who'd win each fight.

the final fight of the night came at least, you had about enough of watching people punch and kick each other and just wanted to crawl into your warm bed back at home but the pair you were with seemed especially excited about this next fight.

the hosts began announcing the arrival of the fights, one of them caught your eye easily with how much he stood out compared to the rest, a man named "toji zen'in" to be exact. he looked much more well rounded physically compared to everyone else, his arms alone looking thicker than your own waist which made your cheeks turn pink. not to mention the beautiful scar over his lips that caught your eyes the most.

suguru leaned in front of satoru to whisper to you, "keep an eye on toji, y/n, he'd be a good actor for your main character in my opinion."

you nodded back at him, reminded of your woes, all eyes in the building now focused on toji as the crowd went quiet. the fight itself was like none that came before it, more brutal for sure with the hits toji was making, but the way he moved was a lot more than just beating the pulp out of his opponent. it was as if he was toying with his opponents and their weaknesses before delivery fast heavy blows. for someone who didn't know all that much about the sport, you found yourself clenching your fists with an unyielding gaze at toji alone while silently cheering him on with the rest of the crowd.

the match ended and toji was unsurprisingly declared the winner, the crowd in an uproar with clapping and shouting. you were so intently watching the fight that you didn't realize how cramped the building had become, suguru was right earlier, that's for sure. everyone in town wanted to see toji in action. while looking around at the crowd and the fighters cheering, your eyes met with tojis for a moment that left you flushed, squeezing your legs together unconsciously and your irises scattering to look away. it was a though you were a lone sheep cornered by a hungry wolf.

"what'd you think, y/n, happy you came?" satoru asked you as the three of you headed out of the building, on your way back home.

"besides failing to find a potential date, the fights were cool, i can use some of it in my book." your mind flashed to the image of toji looking at you, his eyes engrained in your head, the thought turning your ears red as you looked down at the ground ahead of you hoping to avoid being teased like some middle school girl gushing over her crush.

"you're looking flushed, are you feeling okay?"

for a moment you didn't hear suguru's question before he tapped on your shoulder. "oh yeah, sorry, I'm still just cold is all." nothing gets past suguru, the man is beyond observant of those close to him.

"well, we're home now at least, so go warm off and get some sleep, you have that deadline coming up." as caring as he can be though, that still doesn't stop him from a few sadistic smiles here and there as he teases you for your ever so fun reactions.

"oh for the love of─ not you too, suguru!!" pouting as the three of you entered your building together. as you closed the door behind you, you turned back to satoru. "can i get my phone back now?"

"okay okay, but don't sit there staring at it until dawn again trying to find a match." satoru handed you back your phone, refusing to let go of it to you until you agreed before heading off to his room. he knows you better than that and all your habits from the few years of being roommates

after a warm shower, you laid there all tucked into your bed, brooding as you watched the ceiling, imagining toji's face strung across the white paint like stars until you rolled over face down into one of your pillows.

god why am I gushing so much, we don't even know each other

"can't hurt to at least look a little bit" phone in hand, you turned it back on and immediately got a buzz from the dating app appearing on your lockscreen. the notification time revealing that it occurred while you in the gym and had your phone off.

great, well there goes a face to face opportunity instead of wasting time with a date they'd probably run away from

you opened the app to check, unprepared as you were hit with a welcome message showing who you were matched with. it was none other than toji zen'in.

your eyes blankly staring at your phone as it registered what this meant, "you're kidding, right?" his dating profile showcased a shirtless photo of himself in front of a mirror, having obviously finished a workout when he took the photo. bruises adorning his body from training and a few others more suspicious like they hadn't come from a fight whatsoever. a decade older than you, hobbies including fighting and gambling.

"who even puts gambling down..." you continued to lay there staring only at the photo he chose, glossing over each muscle line and eating his body up with your eyes, the way his hair fell into his face, that pretty scar you traced over with your finger. suddenly your phone buzzed, with the app now showing a new message received within the app

toji zenin you enjoy the fight, sweetheart? sent: 11:02pm

your chest now soaring as you shot up in bed, trying to rein in control of your shaky hands to form a response.

oh god did he know before our eyes met? and already a petname...

y/n fushiguro i did, it was enjoyable for me, congrats on winning! sent: 11:03pm

toji zenin was easy enough, i've fought better opponents in back alleys. sent: 11:04pm

damn, well aren't you a little cocky?

y/n fushiguro that's dangerous lol, are you aiming to impress me with that? sent: 11:07pm

you allowed yourself to relax back into your bed, your eyes staring only at his name and icon on the screen wondering if it was worth continuing this conversation. bad enough it was already late at night and you just wanted to sleep, but the thought of even telling him about your novel formed a pit in your stomach.

can't imagine mr. muscle brain here would be willing to work with me

toji zenin think I did enough of a first impression earlier. dinner tomorrow at 7? my treat, doll. sent: 11:11pm

"aaaa you're not making this any easier for me..."

y/n fushiguro sure, I'd like that sent: 11:11pm

"ugh, down to the minute too, how far into depravity i've fallen... whatever, i'll give it one more shot to save this book."

you turned your lamp off and rolled over to sleep, though it didn't come early for you when all you could think about was toji.

the next day eventually arrived, and you greeted your roommates for breakfast as you always do.

"yo, y/n, stay up late checking out more guys?" satoru was already digging in while suguru was in the kitchen still making pancakes for you all.

"didn't need to, as a matter of fact, I got a match and he invited me to dinner tonight." your voice declared it with so much pride that you almost forgot the circumstances surrounding why you're even on the dating app to begin with.

"oh yeah? the guy got a name? what's their bio like?" satoru loved to encourage you to adventure, but at the same time always showed his protective side when it came to matters involving you or suguru.

"believe it or not, it's that toji guy from last night."

"TOJI?" the white haired man shot up, "toji zen'in is your date?" his arms grabbed your shoulders in disbelief, he wanted so badly to grab your phone and inspect the dating app himself like he typically does but you kept it in a tight grip away from him. "you're going to ask him for help with your book, aren't you? you could just not mention it and keep him hooked at least for one dinner."

"idk, satoru, i don't want to lie but i also need to get this stupid deadline done and out of the way already." taking your hands, you covered your frustrated face. "i'll see how it goes but hopefully we can make it far enough to actually get our food."

"if it doesn't then suguru and I will rescue you and we can hit up some more takeout."

"thanks guys."

the day seemed to drag on at a snail's pace. toji eventually sending you details of where to meet up, the restaurant being one that was simple but surprisingly fancier than you'd expect a brute to invite you to. you fitted yourself into a nice mid length skirt and a frilly blouse, patent leather high heels, stockings, jewelry, nice hair, everything you need to make an impression. you didn't mean to get as fancy as you did but that's what happens when you have too much time on your hands and a bundle of nerves.

you took a taxi to the restaurant, entering through the wooden doors to a dimly lit scarlet room. a host greeting you at the door, "welcome miss, may I have your name, please?"

"fushiguro."

"ah yes, miss fushiguro. your date has already arrived, if you'll please just follow me, I can take your jacket then."

the waiter quickly and carefully moved your jacket to a coat rack and walked you over to your table. the walk to the table was one of the hardest parts of the night so far, you could already see him from across the restaurant, his seat positioned to watch you strut over to him. he shifted in his seat upon making eye contact, those deep green orbs looking you up and down conveying what his mouth wouldn't dare speak just yet. you thanked the waiter and sat down across from your date.

as soon as he opened his mouth to speak, his deep voice tickled your body creating goosebumps all down your neck. it wasn't what you expected him to sound like but oh how it made you flutter in your seat. "don't you look nice, doll, got all pretty just for me?"

oh god don't start flirting now

your exposed ears once again turned a soft shade of pink, "nice to meet you in person, toji."

the man repositioned once more, leaning forward to get a better look at you. "so what's a pretty girl like yourself doing on a dating app?"

no no no please don't make me come out and ask already

"uh─ ahem, a few reasons, mainly just to meet someone like anyone else on here I suppose, haha." you nervously laughed.

while not exactly a lie, I can at least hold off on wrecking this...

"on a dating app? doll you're just gonna find one night stands." his eyes narrowed at you with a questioning look.

"is that why you're on them?" hoping you didn't unintentionally sound rude or invasive, you tried to soften your gaze to show that it's just how you are.

"sometimes they can be fun, you already feeling jealous over me, princess?" he smirked, and before you could reply past your blushing face, the waiter delivered you your choice of red wine and took both of your orders.

"you drink?" he asked, almost disappointed sounding in his voice.

"not often, just enough to help me relax. helps sometimes when i'm working on my novels─" shit I brought it up "you don't?"

"nah, shit's wasted on me, can't get drunk."

"really? haha, well maybe that's better in your line of work, strict diets and all."

"you write novels for work? what about?"

please no toji, the food isn't even here yet, i'm too starved to do this now...

"yeah, right now I'm working on a book involving two assassins, but I'm struggling a bit making their romance happen. enemies to lovers is a fun concept but hard for me to write, personally."

fuck this wine, I'm slipping already without food on my stomach, curse me being a lightweight

"oh? why's that?"

saved by the bell as your waiter finally arrived with your entrees, it took everything you had to not tear into it like some fast food fries after a long day in the parking lot. you both began enjoying your meals, toji however took his time, seemingly spending more of it filling his eyes with you instead of his body of the food before him.

the food was delicious, you both ended up with a nice strip of steak, delicately seasoned with a lovely sauce over top. it paired perfectly with your choice of wine. normally your dates would've ended long before this, but toji ended up ordering desert for you, and waited perfectly until the waiter cleared the table to continue working you over.

"you haven't answered my question yet, y/n."

"ahh, you remembered..." you sighed, "well I won't lie since we've come this far, but I'm struggling on a particular romance scene since frankly I'm not experienced enough."

"no kidding? you're writing this stuff and yet you're a virgin?" the man started laughing and reclined in his seat with his one arm over the back, subconsciously spreading his legs further apart than they were before.

"I'm not a virgin, toji!" you carefully protested, trying not to draw attention to yourself. "I've had a boyfriend before but that didn't work out."

"and that's why you're on a dating app? sweetheart that's just asking to be taken advantage of by some lowlife loser."

"you'd think so but the last ten dates I've been on this month alone avoided me like the plague the moment I set the conditions."

toji sighed and pinched the top of his nose with his large digits, "that's cause you're picking shit men, princess. they just want some easy ass to get themselves off to, nothing more."

the waiter came back with your desert, a rich cheesecake slice that you both shared together like a couple. with a fork in your hand, analyzing the piece with such soft eyes that didn't go unnoticed.

"I have a deadline coming up and as my roommate always says, I'm too much of a perfectionist to just make shit up for it without proper research."

toji remained silent as the two of you polished desert off and paid the check for dinner. the wine from earlier still hitting you as you nearly stumbled leaving the restaurant with him.

"shit─ forgot to get a taxi ready, thanks for the lovely meal, toji, it was nice finishing a date for once."

"oh no, princess, we're not done yet. you think I'm gonna let you go off on your own like this? I'm taking you home myself."

"huh, wai─" toji took your hand into his own and lead you down the road to his nice black muscle car. his hand was much larger than yours and oh so warm to the touch. he kept you carefully balanced, remarking that you should be a good girl and not drink alcohol if you can't handle it. you almost didn't want to let go until he opened the passenger door to settle you down into the fine leather seats. he was quiet for most of the trip until an unusually long red light finally made him speak up.

"when's your deadline?"

you moved your gaze off the surrounding street lamps and onto the side of his face and down to his hands gripping the wheel and shifter.

"next week."

"I'll help you out."

did I mishear? am I too drunk to understand? he actually wants to help me, this big shot fighter and the stranger he just met today?

toji side eye'd you before the light changed, an out of sight smile glossing his face as he saw your obvious blushing and innocence showing.

"really? you'd do that even though you don't know me?"

his lips parted slightly, "doll, I know your pretty little self enough from dinner and I'm driving you home, aren't I? I ain't letting some other asshole take advantage of your virginity you're just throwing out there."

"i'm. not. a. VIRGIN!" you protested once more, this time making toji laugh at how much of a cute brat you were being.

"whatever you say, sweetheart, you're too innocent still to not be one. that ex of yours doesn't sound like he could do the job right."

finally, the two of you pulled up to your apartment building and made your way inside together, toji supporting you from tripping in the heels you wanted to wear to show off like some big time femme fatale novelist. inside, you could see that neither of your rommmates' shoes were there.

must be out eating then still

you almost forgot toji was even there as you started heading towards the kitchen for some water, dropping your heels off on the floor as you left the entry.

"oi, princess, ya just gonna leave me here?"

"oh shi─, you can stay here for a bit if you wanted. you want a drink, toji?"

the man was already leaning down over the island table when you handed him a glass, smiling at you with his head leaning on his hand and the other on the table. he only took a quick sip before placing it back on the counter.

"so what do ya say? ya want the experience?"

it was like toji knew how to push your buttons to make you blush, this was an experienced hunk of a man and no matter how much tried to deny it, you were far too vanilla and inexperienced.

"I mean... well... you are here and survived dinner with me, wha-what do you wanna do?" your voice was soft and flustered, your core stunned with butterflies. eyes unable to make contact even as he approached you to set your shaking hands down before you had some glass to clean off the floor. he moved his thick hand up under your chin, his thumb gracing your bottom lip as toji pushed your head back to try and force eye contact out of you.

"for now, just take me to your bed and leave the rest to me. I promise to take good care of ya if you be a good girl for me."

toji stayed a few paces behind you, watching you lead him to your room. oh how exposed you're feeling, for a man who just had dinner, he just felt so ravenous still. entering your room, toji locked the door behind him, your back was still turned, eyes staring ahead at your bed. it felt tight being in your skin, you wanted this, but he was right, this was a whole different fealing than the one your ex ever gave you. you felt his hands tickle your back as they fell onto your waist, his head leaning into your neck, breathing into your ear as toji loosely traced your skin with his fingers.

you almost lost control of your knees before he spun you around and moved his lips just in front of yours, hands reaching behind you with a tight grip. you closed your eyes and parted your lips for him, toji took full advantage and started with a few simple kisses at first before rubbing his tongue against yours. he pulled back with a string of drool following, his tongue still exposed as he caressed your face.

"fuck, y/n, you taste even better than you look."

"i-is it hot in here or just me, I should turn the temp dow─"

toji grabbed your arm and pulled you back into his embrace, setting you down on the foot of your bed, arms at either side of you as he leaned down into your face to continue the dance of your tongues.

"just relax, princess, you're gonna be sweatin' anyways in a minute."

taking his knee, toji began pushing his way forward in between your legs, pressing against your clit as he continued kissing you. his hands began unbuttoning your blouse until it revealed your bra. he encouraged your hands to do the same to remove his shirt. toji's back was a whole other world. tight with muscles, soft skin with some scars adorning him. you traced over each one you found with your fingers. while you were busy with that, the older man unhooked your bra, discarded it along with your shirt to the other side of your room.

"look at you, pretty girl." he eyed your face down to your chest, cupping your breasts in hand. your hips bucked in response over his knees. you noticed a large bulge forming on the older man, his erection no doubt and god was it obvious how gifted he was in that department. "you're already soaking my leg up, doll, do i make you that excited?"

"y-yes, fuck─ toji."

"good girl, now lay back for me."

you followed his instruction, to which he lifted your legs up and removed your skirt. his fingers playing with your clothed clit, making you buck and squeeze your legs around him.

"gotta keep still if you want me to help, y/n."

"sorry, toji." you moaned in response. he pressed deeper into your lips with his fingers as much as the stockings would allow as a punishment of sorts.

"don't be sorry, doll, i want you to enjoy what i'm doin to ya."

toji removed the stockings from you legs, ever so slowly so his fingertips could glide down your inner legs for another satisfactory moan to escape you. he leaned his head in after, tongue to your lower lips.

"you're soaked, sweetheart. you taste so fucking good, fuck─" the squelching sounds from you getting more defined with every action he did. kissing, nibbling, and best of all, extending his tongue as deep as he could inside you. it was hard to not squirm and disrupt the ecstasy, but toji kept a firm grip around your thighs to the point you knew they'd be bruised later.

"toj- fuck, toji!" your voice reduced to babbles and high pitched squeals.

"keep your eyes on me, doll." you wanted so badly to throw your head back as the bubbling sensation grew inside of you, tickling the nerves in your body. the way your eyes kept meeting, the sight of a man you keep gushing over, eating you out with everything he's got was just so irresistible. "cum on me, y/n."

the two of you moaning together, his tongue getting more invasive and his thumb rolling over your pearl until you finally orgasmed. toji finally lifted his head up, your shiny essence marking his lips as yours.

"shit─ i can't get enough of ya, sweetheart, fuck."

your hands were on your own breasts, grabbing at your nipples to help with the orgasm you achieved.

"for someone who acts so innocent with me, your body is acting like a slut. were you this soaked seeing me last night too?"

the answer was obvious the way you avoided eye contact from toji again, you tried to squeeze your legs back together, but he simply stood up and unbuckled his pants. you could already see a spot of wetness near where his tip must be and where you rode against his knee.

"fuck, toji, that's not gonna fit in me!" his erect cock was long and girthy, plenty of veins like his arms, the tip pink and leaking precum.

"i said i'll take care of ya, princess." he crawled onto the bed, leaning over your face, brushing the hair aside with fingers and kissing you softly with your juices joined together. "trust me, y/n."

you nodded your head and toji moved back down to sit next to you. taking one finger at a time, he moved around your lower lips, brushing against your velvet walls as his other hand stroked his own cock. you leaned up a bit to feel his own manhood in your hands, your delicate fingers moving up and down and circling the tip. spreading the sticky residue around.

"fuck─ look what you're doing to me, doll." your mouths were agape, close to one other, squirming from the stimulation. "you're so fucking pretty, y/n, shit─" he moaned, leaking more from his tip as you came on his fingers.

toji placed his wet digits in your mouth, allowing your tongue to work them over, tasting your own juices with hips bucking in response. you placed your hands over your arms and looked deep in his green eyes drunk on love.

"you keep looking at me like that and i'm going to forget about being cautious with ya."

he let you continue to play around with his fingers until he pushed you back down against your sheets. he kneeled then in between your legs, rubbing his cock against your clit and around the entry.

"well, princess?"

you nodded to toji, but that wasn't good enough so he slapped his tip down on your pearl.

"use your words."

"pl-please fuck me, toji!"

"that's my good girl." and with that, he started pushing his way into you. your hips squirming, nails digging into the sheets around you as you couldn't stop the moans escaping your throat.

toji moved in and out slowly at first, "you sound so pretty too, doll, shit─ i lucked out meeting you." his moans were deep and filled your ears, it was impossible to stay still even with his calloused hands tight around your waist. your eyes were all over the place feeling almost completely far off from the world in your own slice of paradise. toji's kept going back and forth between his thrusts, your breasts, and especially the beautiful reactions coming over your face.

"told ya i'd take care of you, you can still take more of my cock, right, princess?"

"there's m-m-more!?"

a smile stretched across his face along with narrowed eyes as he slowed his thrusts and started pushing the rest into you, the tip practically shoved against your womb, rearranging your insides.

"FUCK, toji!" you screamed, a few tears forming around your eyes.

"sorry, sweetheart. it'll get easier, i promise. you're being so fucking good, i'll have to reward you." he coo'd, leaning over to caress your cheeks with his finger.

his motions continued, lifting your legs up and back, hips raised up and bucking with each smack of his heavy balls against you. toji held your arms up above your head as you dug into his wrists with your nails, babbling nonsense between loud moans and yelps. his raven hair dripping slightly with sweat as it fell over his face.

"can i, fuck─, cum inside you? i want to reward your good behavior."

"-ease don't stop, toji." puppy dog eyes unbecoming of an innocent girl aimed directly at toji, his veins twitching inside you as he relentlessly sucked on your neck, allowing your fingers to carve his back out. the fluttering sensation higher than ever before and the sudden onset of warmth flooded your insides. you bucked and twisted yourself, toes curling in as you moaned the name of the man fucking you senseless.

"shit, your tight pussy is emptying me."

it almost made you cum again as he exited and the juices inevitably flushing out. toji admired the view and praised you once more for being such a good girl for him. he turned you over onto your back, your face now shoved against your pillow. toji placed his hand behind your kneecap and lifted up as he thrusted back into you. it's no wonder there's a million different positions when it comes to sex. each one seems to hit a different g-spot you never knew existed sending you further into an abyss of decadence.

his mouth was moaning aside your ear, his tight chest landing on your back with each thrust. despite being face first smothered in your pillow, no hummed moans went unnoticed by toji, each one being rewarded with the climactic feeling until he once again coated your insides with his hot seed.

"oh fuck, toji." you puffed, attempting to catch your breath.

"yes, sweetheart?"

"that felt so good but i don't think i'm out of stamina..." your body was weak and tired, while nearly sobered from your wine, you were very much drunk off his cock. body still shaken and ecstatic, hips reactive to the slightest touch as you squeezed your thighs together to savor the feeling of your orgasm.

toji caressed your lower back with the back of his hands, "told ya, all you had to do was be a good girl and i'd take care of ya. unlike some other assholes." he grabbed a few tissues to clean you up a bit and himself. "you got a shower then we can use?"

"we?" you questioned, rolling over to face him.

"oh yes, we. you ain't walkin' for shit after this even if you wanted to."

protesting a bit with your usual pouts, you tried to stand up to prove the older man wrong but your legs slipped and you fell back into his arms.

"...carry me?" the puppy dog eyes were back again with a booboo lip to compliment your trained begging.

"is that how good girls ask for help?"

"pleaaase~, toji?"

he laughed while he swooped you up into a bridal carry. you pointed the way to your bathroom where toji took care in helping you clean off in the shower, teaching you another lesson in love before getting out and returning to bed together. toji laid on his back, looking at you while your head rested where his arm meets his thick chest. you were long gone into your slumber as you drooled onto him with an innocent face that seduced the older man futher.

"so fragile and defenseless... gonna have to keep ya around with me for good, sweetheart."

morning came and toji was still sleeping like a bear when you got up. taking the first shirt you found in hand and a pair of fresh lacy panties, you stumbled out to the kitchen to find some food, rubbing your tired eyes along the way.

"did you forget that you have roommates, y/n?"

your body tightened, "oh fuck, satoru." turning towards the voice, you see suguru and satoru already at the table eating.

"there's leftover eggs in the pan if you're looking for some food."

"suguruuuu," you looked at him with pleading eyes, thankful that he always knew you'd be hungry as well and joining them to eat.

"by the way, whose shoes are those at the entrance?" he asked, you were going to answer but then a deep voice interrupted.

"mine."

"toji, your shirt!" you yelped, satoru dropped his utensils at the sight of the fighter walking around your shared apartment bare chest and all.

"toji slept over!?"

"someone, decided to take my shirt if you hadn't noticed yet."

"shit─ sorry i didn't realize when i grabbed it, still sleepy."

"keep it then, princess, it's all yours to keep me in that pretty little head of yours." toji approached where you were in the kitchen and placed his hand on the top of your head refusing to move it as you struggled to not die of embarrassment in front of your roommates.

"we're still here, you know? did you forget us again? that's kinda fucked up, y/n." satoru joked, throwing himself into the situation like a third wheel while suguru just sat there eating and smiling.

toji pointed his thumb back at the pair, "who are they? your shitty exes?"

satoru's jaw dropped, ready to raise a fist before as suguru pulled him back down to his seat.

"oh god no, toji, these are my roommates, satoru and suguru. we've been best friends for years."

"good. if they were your exes, i'd be showing them what a lowlife they are for not treating ya properly."

"jeez, well aren't you protective of me, feeling jealous already?" your tone jokingly mocking the way he too questioned your "jealous" feelings last night on your date.

toji cupped your chin once more to make eye contact with a devious smile, "you think this is the only time i'm gonna be seeing ya?" he moved his face in closer, brushing your lips with his own as he traveled to your ears to whisper, "you're mine, princess. there's a lot more to teach ya as i corrupt your innocence even further."

by now your face was as red as the fruit on the table as he laughed and began preparing his own plate of breakfast. the four of you trying to enjoy breakfast together without a fight breaking out. toji's hand was gripping your thigh under the table while caressing with his thumb. you smiled, taking in the moment and how wonderful it felt to finally have something to finish your deadline and a new boyfriend to fill your heart and much more.

☆ Notes: really enjoyed writing this so look forward to more in the future! i know mma toji is popular but it's just such a fitting career path for an au especially over other fighting/athletic careers.

[ghostsofmemories]

hey lovely people! i am finally making a real writeblr introduction to pin to my profile, because i finally like my url and thus am happy to put it on a little graphic. anyway, let’s get on with this this.

some basics:

my name is August (he/him)!

i’m 20

i’m from Michigan (US)

i’m aroace and trans!

i write literary fiction novels and poetry (and maybe short stories if i can ever figure those out)

i’m a cancer and an infj! not super into star signs or even mbti anymore but it’s still cool

my projects (in no particular order):

Where Edges Meet Soft Things, a poetry collection i've been selling my soul to for the last four years. it’s about joy and pain and fathers and the past. it's everything to me.

Insect Poison, a novel i have been fighting with for 5 years now. it was originally about a serial killer and a group of teenagers he kidnaps, but now it’s follows a set of twins, Robert and Ramona, and the turn the family takes after Ramona drowns in a lake in the middle of the night. did her brother do it? was it an accident? did she lowkey deserve it? these are questions i cannot answer because i do not know. what i can tell you is that i'll finish this book even if it kills me, and there will definitely be a ghost in it.

i run a little side project i call The Photo Archive, which is essentially me scanning and posting vintage photographs from old magazines and books (mainly national geographic but there's many others as well) to make sure they don't get lost to time and that the photographers are credited. i run a separate tumblr for it (@thephotoarchive) but the brunt of the project takes place on pinterest, where i'm able to sort the photos into boards based on source material and other people can share them to their own boards. if you ever see my poetry overlaid on some cool vintage pictures, that's where they came from! it's really just a passion project, but if you're a collage artist or photography enthusiast i'm sure scrolling through the pinterest for a couple minutes will be fun!

okay so now if you’re only really here for writing, feel free to peace out because this is where i start talking about other stuff! if other stuff interests you, feel free to carry on.

my hobbies outside writing include reading, art, photography, crochet, guitar, singing + music production, and applying for jobs i’m not qualified for. 

here are some other fun facts/some of my favorite things if you’re still here:

i have a wonderful cat named Nemo

my favorite books are The Vanishing Half by Brit Bennett, Cloud Cuckoo Land by Anthony Doerr, The Hollow Kind by Andy Davidson, Mouthful of Birds by Samanta Schweblin, and Time is a Mother by Ocean Vuong

i have a slightly unhealthy (but otherwise harmless) fixation on Taylor Swift

if you also like Taylor Swift i already know you’re wondering. my favorite album is evermore but i truly do love them all very much

i very rarely watch movies or TV shows, but my favorite show is The Haunting of Hill House (and all the Mike Flanagan series are in my top 5 shows, Midnight Mass is a close second)

i have literally never had caffeine, aside from a few sips of a few sodas

as you have probably figured out, i really like ghosts. metaphorical ghosts, fictional ghosts, evidence and stories of possible real-life ghosts and obviously just ghost stories in general. i just think they’re neat

well. i think that’s about it. i’m still trying to figure out how to post here again (specifically how i want to format my poetry), but you can see a lot more content from me on instagram! i post poems when i can and post on my stories way more than anyone would want to see.

and there you have it, an intro.

[ryosmne]

Tattoo Artist! Sukuna x reader (part 3)

Hey there again, I had a few ideas of where i wanted to take the third part, I'm very happy with what I came up with, it's very very fluffy, I hope you have a good time reading 💜.

Series masterlist here

Here's a playlist for fluffy Sukuna

Warnings: Language, suggestive tones, alcohol consumption (everyone is of age here, around 21/22), nudity? Not really described, that's about it.

Saturday was slow for Sukuna, he doesn't really like working away his weekends, but here he is, finishing up a chest piece that looked good if he had to say so himself. Everything was luckluster to him compared to the project he was still drafting for y/n.

Speaking of her she hadn't texted him all day, neither did Sukuna. He told himself he wasn't clingy like that, she texted him before she would do it again surely. Y/n didn't pay much mind to him not making contact, perhaps he was busy. She wasn't wrong, she also had initiated most of their text conversations, she didn't want to seem desperate. Sukuna was going to contact her when he was free.

On the other hand Sukuna was stressed, passing in the hallway between the reception and his work booth, checking his phone every once in a while, he was a bit snappier than usual, not letting Gojo's or Megumi's remarks go, he would answer back, his voice almost dripping with venom, he was very much pissed and it showed.

When closing time finally came he was ready to blow up, Gojo teasing him, only made him more agitated. Gojo knew something was bothering him and he wasn't planning on dropping the subject.

"Hey 'kuna, tell the truth, you took her out and she left because she couldn't stand you, that's why you're so mad."

The white haired man joked, you could see the smoke coming out Sukuna's ears.

"Don't call me that. For your information, me and y/n had a great time, quit being an bumbass I'm not mad." Y/n did enjoy herself right? It sure looked like it. Was Sukuna getting insecure? Yes. Could everyone tell he was lying about not being mad? Also Yes.

"Oh so it's 'you and y/n' now? You were right Geto, he's got it real bad, he's not even calling her 'some girl' or something."

Gojo continued to laugh, he was enjoying every single second of torment he was putting Sukuna through.

He had enough though, he grabbed his jacket and his keys, but just before he left the rest of his crew and Yuuji, who came to eat with Megumi to close, he called to the most rational person inside. "Geto, come on I'll drive you home." Sukuna needed someone to talk to, he needed to know he was in the right and not going totally insane. Nanami was really close to him but relationships wasn't a topic he would really touch on. Gojo was out of the question, the man was a womaniser, not that it was a bad thing but he wouldn't even take Sukuna seriously, he only wanted to annoy him for the time being. Megumi was also a no. He would spill the beans to Yuuji, he already had Gojo on his ass he didn't need two more idiots making fun of him, one was barely tolerable. That only left Geto, who has at least had a few solid relationships and he was trustworthy enough not to give him too much shit.

Geto grabbed the chance not to have to clean for one night, but he was very curious about Sukuna's sudden move to give him a ride home, he has never offered that before. Yuuji had tipped him off, he knew his brother wanted to get all of the attention, if y/n didn't make a move, his brother would go insane. He was surprisingly right, so Yuuji told Geto to try and get his brother riled up. Now Geto didn't exactly agree, but he wanted to give Sukuna a friendly nudge to the right direction.

Sukuna had already been driving for a little while, he couldn't find the courage to open his mouth and talk. Has he gone mad? Its not like he's clueless about girls, he's had many. Why was it different this time?

"So how come you wanna drive me around at night?" The raven haired man asked, eyebrow raised, ready to hear what his friend was so on edge for all day, even though he had an idea. Sukuna wasn't one to share feelings, he never did, he couldn't really tell anyone the reason why not a single word from y/n all day irked him so damn much. "Look, so let's say there's this girl right? You take her out, you have fun, everything is cruising perfectly, but then she doesn't really talk to you the next day." He said with a small pause "hypothetically speaking" He added, just to avoid further questions.

Geto looked at him with a blank face, although he couldn't really believe in his ears, Yuuji was right, he knew his friend was falling face first, it still surprised him. He saw the day that Sukuna was stressed for a girl, if someone told him even two weeks ago that this was going to happen happen, Geto most definitely would've laughed straight in their face.

"Well it depends really, for example did you text her and she didn't answer? Then yeah, she's not interested, but maybe she's busy, or she started texting first and she wants you to initiate." Sukuna blinked "You're right she's busy, she has a test too, maybe she has been studying, she'll come around." He said, the words came fast out of his mouth. Geto looked at him again more serious this time. "Look man, I know for a fact, you haven't texted first, you seem to really like her, don't be a pussy and send her one text." His tone was equally serious. "I'm just fond of her, that's all she's good company." Sukuna tried to brush him off, Geto wouldn't budge. "Call it what you want, I know you like the feisty ones, so do many people and you know how college kids are, one party is all it takes to lead to who knows what. Man up, when you do you can bring her around the shop too, you know we all would love to meet her." By the time Geto finished his sentence, Sukuna had already parked outside of his apartment to drop him off, they shared their good nights.

For the rest of his lonely drive home Sukuna couldn't help but think of that party his brother mentioned a couple nights ago, was y/n going to be there? And Geto's words kept replaying in his head.

Geto was smiling to himself walking inside his apartment knowing he did the right thing giving his friend a slight push.

With her hair just the way she liked it, her make-up done and an outfit that extenuated her best features, y/n was making her way down the street to meet up with Mai outside of Todo's place. The walk wasn't too long and y/n caught a glimpse of her short haired friend, who was also dressed to impress, standing right out of Todo's door.

"You didn't wait long did you?" Y/n asked, Mai smilled and shook her head, she was the late one most of the time, she did make it just a second before y/n arrived.

"Let's go, my sister and Nobara are waiting" she informed y/n, who nodded. "Really, I haven't seen Maki in a while, Nobara rarely shows up in class too." She said full of excitement, the girls were friends for a long while, even before college. Mai and y/n ended up forming closer friendship.

"Yeah they're about to remind us of how single we are." Mai loved her sister with all her heart, she was very competitive though and when Maki got with Nobara before Mai could strike up a boyfriend in college, she took it a bit personally. Then she focused her attention on finding someone for y/n, but that never went well. Hopping right up the stairs both girls were talking about what they would see tonight, more accurately who. "So Yuuji is probably going to be here, I asked Todo" Mai said her eyes hopefull, y/n rolled her's and her companion didn't let it go unnoticed. "I really don't get you, he's cute, you even said so." There she goes again, but y/n wouldn't let it slide this time. "You seem way more giddy to see him, than I do." She said, knocking on Todo's door who was waiting right behind it, answering in seconds. Mai was still dumbfounded, she hardly acknowledged Todo at the door and made her way inside with y/n.

Thankfully the sofa on Todo's living room they usually sat on was only occupied by Maki and Nobara. "Wow sis you made it on time for once without someone dragging you out the house." Maki hugged her sister tightly, "I didn't really have a choice, y/n said she would go home if I was late again." Mai, said with a bit of a whine. Nobara went for y/n. "She's giving you hell huh?" Her comment made the girl laugh. "Nah she's fine, she can be a bit of a baby." That line made Mai slap her arm playfully, even when they made digs at each other, it was all in good fun.

Y/n could see Mai out the corner of her eye scanning the room, it wasn't unusual for her to do that, but it was the fourth time the past 30 minutes they've been here. Something was definitely up with her, and when she raised her hand having finally spotted the one she was looking for, y/n was a hundred percent sure of what was going on.

"Yuuji, over here" Mai called hand in the air, a very friendly smile on her face. Yuuji eagerly walked over offering his greetings, his attention was on y/n "Hey, has my brother texted you at all?" That was an out of the blue question. Mai gave her a look "His brother?" She questioned, then looked back at Yuuji "You've got a brother?" Why did he have to say that infront of Mai, she wouldn't leave her alone until she told her everything about the guy, she was at least thankful he didn't mention a date, Sukuna probably hadn't mentioned anything to him. "Oh yeah, he's the one I went to last week and no Yuuji he hasn't, did something happen?" Mai stayed silent, so did the other girls, they planned on interrogating her later, judging by the looks they exchanged. "Oh it's nothing" Yuuji let out a breathy laugh, knowing he plotted with Geto to get under his brother's skin. Payback for the bagels he baked at 4 am was going to be sweet.

Yuuji took a seat next to Mai, who introduced him to her sister, Nobara already knew him short of and the two of them begun chatting casually. Y/n could see the chemistry between them as he complimented the dark haired girl on the way she looked tonight. She could see their eyes meeting, something more than friendliness resided in the looks they shared.

Y/n let her friend have her fun, at this point Maki and Nobara had adopted her taking shots, talking about the annoying situations that have occurred in the time they hadn't seen each other. Nobara in particular, was sharing her frustrations about men not taking her seriously as Maki's significant other and continuing to make moves on her partner. "I shut them down" Maki said proudly snaking an arm around her girlfriend's waist. "I know you do, I just want them to feel a bit threatened" Nobara's eyes drifted to the floor . "What are you talking about? Remember the time you just looked at that guy eyeing her and he mouthed 'sorry'? You're very threatening." Y/n took another shot laughing with the two girls. Her comment was quite comforting to Nobara and Maki knew that things always went Nobara's way, she just liked complaining sometimes, she was the jealous type.

Todo with Takada in hand, who arrived right after y/n and Mai, answers his door again for the multipluth time this evening, seeing the last person he expected. "I thought you were too old for house parties" he taunted at the grumpy man infront of him. "Screw you I'm 26, and I didn't come empty handed" Sukuna spoke, his tone getting a bit friendlier at the last words in his sentence. He passwd the two bottles of vodka he held to Todo. "Well come on in, Yuuji's brother is also mine" he said giving the pink haired man a friendly hug.

Sukuna's eye scanned his living room untill his eyes landed on the back of y/n's head, he headed straight her way.

Y/n heard a few girls around her making a fuss over some apparently really hot guy who just entered, but she didn't bother turning around. That was until she heard it "Huh, who would've known, you actually have friends" That voice was unmistakably his. Sukuna was here. Y/n's heart was fluttering in her chest but the alcohol in her system made it easy to come up with a comeback. "At least I don't pay mine to hang around me." She said, her voice laced with sarcasm, she still didn't turn to face him, she was frozen in place. Mai's, Maki's, Yuuji's and Nobara's eyes were wide and dancing between the two. There was for sure something going on here. Sukuna took a seat beside her casually draping an arm around the back of the sofa. "You're hurting my feelings doll, I'm not that bad" he spoke so softly, she almost got lost looking into his eyes. He looked way too good for her liking, same jewelry and eyeliner as the last time she saw him, his pink her strategically messed up, a silk black button down with the top two buttons undone, exposing his defined collarbones and the tattoos that extended to his chest and neck, black pants framing his thighs perfectly as he sat. Y/n was staring at this point, her friends were silent, taking in the image that was displayed before them. They had never seen y/n flustered or having difficulty forming words. Even Yuuji was surprised, seems like he was wrong about y/n's taste.

Sukuna was enjoying the look on her face a little more than he cared to admit, he would've taken his teasing further, but he didn't want to embarrass the girl anymore and her friends were already shocked. "Aren't you going to introduce me?" He asked her poking her cheek, and y/n could see Nobara was about to blow up.

"Right, Mai, Maki and Nobara this is Sukuna, he's um my tattoo artist?" What was she even supposed to say at this point? The guy she went on a date with and had the best make out session of her life?

Sukuna gave his hand out to the girls greeting them, he noticed his brother a few seats over who was concealing a laugh "you're here too brat" he briefly egnowledged him, Yuuji hummed back a hello in return, turning to Mai who was very eager to hear the details of y/n's and Sukuna's relationship, he sure as hell didn't look like just her tattoo artist.

"Tattoo artist? Really? you don't even have tattoos y/n" Nobara spoke, she just wanted her friend to be honest with her, if she had someone special, she could have said so, they've known each other for years. Sukuna wasn't surprised to hear that y/n hadn't shared that she got tattooed, he could tell she was a bit of a private person.

Y/n took off her jacket that she still had on from when she arrived, to show off the design to Maki and Nobara, Mai had already seen it and she was busy gossiping with Yuuji anyways. "Right, I forgot to tell you" she said, as Maki and Nobara scanned her upper arm with their eyes, so did Sukuna. He couldn't help himself, y/n looked so beautiful in his work. He wanted to cover every inch of her skin she was willing to give him, she could be his personal work of art, she already was one, but he wanted to decorate her in the best way he could and with the most beautiful art he could make. "That looks so beautiful" Maki spoke in awe, Nobara gave a little laugh "it's creepy, but it's really you. "

She took a look at Sukuna then back at y/n "It's very fitting, I don't know how to explain it." She continued.

Sukuna never took compliments that seriously, but hearing y/n's seemingly bitchy friend praise his work and the perception he had of her made him grin widely.

The four of them continued to speak, Maki and Nobara were very interested in Sukuna's line of work, Mai and Yuuji also took their turns in talking when they weren't too busy with one another. Y/n's friends were doing great with Sukuna, she thought he would be really difficult, he has a very explosive personality. Sukuna was putting in all the effort to make a good impression, both to y/n and the ones around her.

"So, did you miss me that much you came to find me?" Y/n asked once the attention was taken off of them. Mai looked to be having a deep conversation with Yuuji whereas Maki and Nobara got up to dance. "And if I did?" Sukuna spoke, his face dangerously close to hers, when did he manage to get hip to hip with her? Then again y/n had grown so comfortable around him, she didn't notice.

"Well, if that's the case, I'm glad you did come." She replied, Sukuna could tell she was a bit tipsy, else he would be making out with her on that sofa not caring who was watching.

Y/n poured herself another drink, thank god she didn't have to get up to get a refill, but Sukuna's voice stopped her movements. "Maybe you should ease up there" he said watching her fill two cups.

Y/n raised a brow at him "since where are you a party pooper? come on it ain't a party without a drink" her voice was playful as she tried passing one cup to him. Sukuna liked this y/n too, she was a bit more giggly, she smiled a bit more, "I'm driving sweetheart". Y/n was satisfied with his answer and proceeded to gulp down on both the cups she filled before Sukuna could stop her. She laughed pointing at him with her tongue out "too slow". Sukuna could only smile and pat her head. She was something else.

Somewhere along the night, Maki and Nobara disappeared and so did Yuuji and Mai. "You better tell your brother to take good care of my friend" y/n's state was getting worse, or more hilarious, it depended on how you looked at it. Sukuna would straight up laugh with some of the things she said, and he was trying his best to keep all forms of alcohol away from her, for her own good. "I don't think you should worry, Yuuji is much better than me in these kinds of things." He replied honestly, but y/n didn't necessarily see it like that. "There's no way he's that smooth" she trailed, the corners of her lips tugging upward. "Well if I didn't know any better, I'd say you liked me, didn't you think I was a dick?" Sukuna asked "Still do" her smile only grew wider.

One thing was for sure, y/n was very demanding when drunk, Sukuna left her side for the first time all night to get her some water, cause she felt 'like SpongeBob under that lamp drying out'. Not even slightly bothered by her request, Sukuna was on his way back to her, that's when he saw some guy standing infront of her trying to talk to her. Y/n even in her not very conscious state didn't tolerate people who didn't respect her "Just one song, come on it won't hurt, you're alone after all" the guy, y/n didn't care to catch the name of said "look, I don't dance, not unless the company is worth it, and I'm here with someone, leave me alone, this is getting annoying" Sukuna observed laughing to himself. He didn't feel the need to intervene yet. Y/n didn't like getting bossed around that's for sure, nor did she need a knight in shining armour to protect her, not that he would mind doing that. Sukuna casually sat down beside her again, ignoring the guy who was still standing there for some reason. That irritated him, it was enough that he tried to make a move on her, but not leaving while he was right there rubbed him the wrong way, "Here you go sweetheart" He said handing her the glass, praying that she won't drop and break it, he threw a glare at the guy who finally took the hint and left. "Thank you 'kuna." Y/n spoke, in a tone totally different from the one she had moments ago.

The nickname alone made his heart jump. Gojo was quite annoying when he called him that, but hearing the same word rolling out of y/n's tongue was completely different. Sukuna couldn't tell why he was feeling that way, he didn't care though, all he knew was that even the air smelled sweeter, when he was around her.

"You don't dance unless the company is good?" He asked, genuinely curious "well yes, if I feel comfortable I'll dance, but I don't really do it that much" she said, eyes heavy looking all over Sukuna's frame. " I see, how about we dance?" Sukuna suggested, he rarely danced himself, y/n made him want to get out of his comfort zone, hell he's already at a house party thanks to her.

"Only if you take some shots with me." She smilled at him malevolently. "You're playing dirty, who's going to take you home if I'm drunk?" Sukuna just wanted to hear her drunken logic "It probably takes a bottle for you to get drunk, you're clumsy, drunk or not, you're probably going to kill me if I get in your car".

Sukuna was full blown laughing, but she was right, her head was still not gone, she could walk and talk fine, she was just more talkative and cheerful, couple of shots wouldn't hurt, he could walk her home after since she lived close by, he remembered the way and then walk back home himself. She also gave him the cutest look he'd ever seen, how could he deny her?

"Ok you win" he raised his hands in defeat and y/n couldn't be happier. She poured 4 shots for them, which they quickly consumed and they were off to dance.

She never pictured him as a dancer, y/n saw Sukuna as the very cool looking dude standing on the bar, probably drinking whiskey with a bit of ice.

Looks can be deceiving, Sukuna was spinning her around, their bodies were pressed together, guiding each other to the beat. Eyes were meeting, body heat was exchanged, they fit like puzzle pieces even like this. Y/n kept looking at the exposed skin of his neck, why did he have to look like that and be this close, her face only grew warmer once her eyes met his and then dropped to his lips. Its not that Sukuna didn't want to kiss her, he would most certainly prefer her to be sober and remember it clearly the next day.

Those last two shots y/n had, in addition to Sukuna's body against hers, made her vision a bit blurry and her knees weak. "Hey doll, everything ok? You with me?" He shook her lightly by the shoulders, he could tell she was growing tired and he noticed how her demeanor changed. "Mhm, I'm sleepy 'kuna" there she goes again, making his heart skip beats. Y/n would be giving him so much shit had she realised she made him feel like that. "Ok then, how about we take you home ?" Sukuna's voice was so mellow, almost like he was talking to a toddler.

He guided her out of the crowded house, Todo was nowhere to be found, so Sukuna couldn't really let him know he was leaving.

Y/n was leaning on him, walking slowly down the street towards her place, but she abruptly stopped and sat down.

"What's wrong?" Sukuna asked, his sound as mellow as before. She was down right adorable, sitting there with a pout of her face .

"My feet hurt" y/n complained, dramatically throwing her arms around, if it was any other person Sukuna would've droped them to fend for themselves. "Really? That's sad" he replied, dropping down to her level, she only nodded, women's shoes are the most uncomfortable thing in the world. Sukuna scooped her up in his arms and carried her bridal style the rest of the way, he couldn't have her complaining and it wasn't like she would remember much either. With her arms wrapped securely around his neck, y/n could feel the warmth creeping up her neck all the way up to her ears, she didn't see the satisfied smile Sukuna wore.

Today went a lot better than he expected. So well that the tiredness got to y/n before they reached her apartment. Sukuna watched as she fell asleep in his arms. What a strange girl, she had both shyness and attitude, she was dancing her heart out no more than 15 minutes ago yet she still managed to fall asleep as he carried her.

Reaching her building, luckily the main entrance was unlocked. Sukuna took a peek at her, he couldn't bring himself to wake her up, she looked so peaceful, but unfortunately he had to. "Hey, which floor are you on?" He whispered softly, that was enough to shake y/n awake. "Third" she whispered back. Sukuna took the elevator up, and he finally reached her hallway, he only wished she didn't get her floor wrong or it would look like he was trying to break into someone else's house. "Doll, can you point your door for me? I'll put you down for a bit, where are your keys?" Y/n pointed at her door, handed Sukuna her keys and groaned as he set her down to unlock it for her. "You're such a brat" he pointed out swinging the door open, her annoyed face looked even cutter under the barely lit hallway.

Lord knows how Sukuna managed to find the light switches in the dark but he made it, y/n looked completely out of it now. He picked her back up and tried a few doors to find her bedroom. He gently layed her on the mattress. Y/n groaned again and said something about being uncomfortable. Of course she was uncomfortable, with her clothes still on from going out, there's no way she wasn't.

He shouldn't care right? He should just let her be and go home, but Sukuna could already tell she would have an awful nights sleep and he wanted her to rest properly. "Were do you keep sleep clothes" he asked, y/n pointed lazily at some drawer. After briefly digging in the drawer, he took out a pair of sweat pants and a hoodie for her.

He reached her frame again, undoing her shoes, sliding them off, next he prompted y/n with her side resting on the headboard so he could have her sit up with her legs dangling of the side of her bed. His hands found the rim of her shirt, her voice stopped him "don't look ok?" Her voice was hardly above a whisper. "I won't look"

"Promise?" She asked holding out her pinky

"promise" he stated locking it.

Sukuna averted his eyes from her body and helped her into her comfy clothes. Only one thing remained "Now come on time to get your makeup off"

"Nooo, I want to sleep" she complained loudly, dropping her body backwards on the bed. "Come on, it's not good for your skin, it will just be a minute, just be good for me" he said grabbing her hand, but y/n turned her head away. That's when Sukuna threw her over his shoulder, the most she could do was weakly hit his back and tell at him to put her down.

Sukuna sat her somewhere in her bathroom, while she still mumbled about being sleepy. He got a washcloth wet, and took a look at the products in her cabinet, she surely had an oil cleanser he just had to find it... bingo.

He pushed her hair out of the way and gently applied and massaged the product on to her skin, giving her instructions to keep her eyes and mouth close, he was extra careful not to cut her with his nails, then he used the washcloth to remove all the make-up that melted off. Sukuna also wore liner, not all the time but often enough to know that some things didn't come off with soap and water. He takes care of himself, his skin, his hair, his nails, everything. He knows a bit more than he's willing to share. Next he followed the same steps with her cleaner, y/n was enjoying herself, half asleep under his touch. He finished everything by applying a serum and a moisturizer on her face. "You've got the cheap stuff." He joked. "Hey it works" y/n defended as he picked her up once more.

This time he layed her under the covers, he pulled them up over her body, looking at her with plain adoration, he leaned down to press a kiss on her forehead.

"Sleep tight, I'll text you." He whispered in her ear, turning around to leave. A hand tugged oh his wrist, the same way he had done to her a couple days ago. Y/n was looking at him with pleading eyes "please stay" she almost begged, "are you sure? Its really late" he said, y/n nodded patting the spot beside her, he couldn't say no to those eyes. He quickly got rid of his shoes and dress shirt, he disappeared to the bathroom to take off his eyeliner and got under the covers with her.

Y/n curled up next to him, laying her head on his chest, taking in all his warmth and scent while listening to his heartbeat, his arm was wrapped securely around her.

" Can I ask you something?" Y/n's voice broke the silence. "Didn't you want to sleep?" Sukuna teased, and y/n took the opportunity to ask anyway. "Why do you like me?" What kind of question is this? Sukuna blamed the fact that she was a bit out it. She had no reason to be insecure, she was stunning and she also had a personality to back up her looks. "Let's see... you're kind of a badass, no one really talks back to me like you do, you're quite easy on the eyes too" what he said was very true, but he was falling for the little details too. The way she picked mindlessly at her food as she talked when he took her out, or the way her eyes sparkled when something peaked her interest. Even her drunken self had him feeling things he never did.

"How come you were single? Judging by your friends it's been a while" The words came out of his mouth before he could stop them, but y/n didn't give any signs of being bothered by his assumption. "Honestly, I don't want someone to fall out of love and leave me behind" Drunken words are sober thoughts. Sukuna didn't want to ask if that had happened to her before, he didn't care, he would do better than whoever hurt her.

More moments passed with him rubbing comforting circles on her back, he was sure she was asleep, her breath was slow and steady against his chest. "I wonder, what would you say if I asked you to be mine?" Sukuna whispered, staring up at her ceiling. "I'd say yes, airhead" y/n mumbled. Sukuna's eyes widened, she wasn't supposed to hear that. "I'll make sure to ask you soon then" he said, y/n looked up at him, this time he couldn't help himself and captured her lips in his, in a very slow passionate kiss. It didn't last long but it was enough to keep y/n's head spinning around with him running through it. "Sleep already, brat"

"okay 'kuna".

The light coming in, beaming through her curtains, woke y/n from a very peaceful sleep, now all she felt was the vodka she consumed the night before. Her head was pounding hard, she reached for her phone on her nightstand. Instead of her phone, her hand made contact with a piece of paper.

Good morning doll.

You're most definitely feeling like shit, but don't worry you didn't do anything too embarrassing. Unfortunately I had to go to work early and you looked cute sleeping, I didn't want to wake you. There are pain killers next to you, you must have a hell of a headache. Don't forget to eat, I made breakfast for you in the kitchen (with all I could manage to find, you should go grocery shopping more often). Text me or I might think you died in your sleep. Have a wonderful day y/n.

- Sukuna

PS I took a peek in one of your notebooks. I was right, your handwriting is really fucking bad.

Of course he had to be his usual smug self, y/n found herself laughing at the words scribbled on the paper that was obviously ripped out of one of her notebooks. His handwriting was as pretty as his drawings, so aesthetically pleasing. He had even taken time to doodle coffee cups, and some trees at the bottom of the page.

The events from the previous night were starting to flood back to her head head. She took the pain killers Sukuna left out for her, he was kind enough to place a glass of water on her nightstand too. Y/n couldn't believe Sukuna not only stayed over, but he also put in so much effort for her, he certainly didn't look like the type to do so.

Walking in her kitchen, what she witnessed, exceeded all her expectations. When she read breakfast she thought he made her a sandwich, which she would've been extremely grateful for. Sukuna had gone all out, from pancakes, to French toast, an omelet and even her coffee served. She just stood there looking at her table, mouth almost hanging.

Her phone buzzed in the pocket of her sweat pants.

You should've told me you were going out with Yuuji's hot brother. I would've never guessed that's your type.

Mai seemed to be in a mood to tease her.

You're right I should've told you, your turn, where did you and Yuuji run off to last night?

Y/n laughed knowing it was going to take a while to get a response. She sat down looking at all the choices she had, wondering what to pick. It's safe to say everything was as delicious as Sukuna.

I'm impressed. You draw, you cook AND you didn't burn down my house, I'm very thankful for that (breakfast was delicious too).

Sukuna, stared down at his phone, all the stress he had two nights ago long forgotten. Only thing that remained was to get y/n right back in his chair.

Happy to hear you're alive and kicking and you enjoy my cooking. I've got to go through, some dickbag wants me to do a cover-up. I'll talk to you later.

He dealt with this client in an unusually polite manner. Y/n had brighten his morning from the moment he woke up next to her.

Bonus Domain shenanigans: "Yuuji was right, I had to push him" Geto said to an agitated Gojo, who wanted to get under Sukuna's skin for a little longer. "Then hopefully he will bring her over, that would for sure be fun, he's going to get so worked up if we give her any attention." Gojo was rubbing his hands together at the thought. "I don't think that's a good idea. I'm not that worried about what Sukuna will do to you, we've both seen y/n, she doesn't even take his shit, I think she'd hit you." Nanami pointed out ."Well I haven't yet seen her, Yuuji said she was nice to him." Megumi joined the conversation remembering his friend talking about the girl, he had zoned out for half of it though. "I haven't seen her either, I did hear her though, she doesn't sound like she would let you pull something like that to him" Geto spoke again. "Nah she looked friendly, we can for sure make him foam at the mouth" Gojo plotted. "I can guarantee, she will rip of your head of if you try your shit." Sukuna was sure of it too.

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[rinstars]

𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 — 𝐬.𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮 (𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞)

pairing: suna rintarou x reader

genre/trope: angst, unrequited love, forbidden love

warnings: nsfw, profanity, infidelity, mentions of weed/drugs, intoxication

description: you knew you never meant to him as much as he meant to you.. yet deep down, you still hoped his heart also breaks with every single goodbye and the regrets of the past clings to him a lot more than he let you believe.

note: this is a repost of 'the call' where i changed and added a few things to make it fit as a prologue better, so make sure u still read it. i'll do this series at my own pace so please just be patient! i'll open the taglist so just send me an ask if you want to be tagged hehe.

The smell of leather and weed floating in the space surrounding you constricts your breathing, making you gasp for air – even more as he suctions the air out of you through your heated shared kiss, your lungs burning with the need for oxygen. But you ignore it. Running your fingers through his hair and meeting his hunger with kisses equally as rough, you ignore the building pain on your chest.

You rock your hips towards him, feeling his hard crotch rub you through the lace of the panties you bought just a few days ago. Pulling away for a moment only to gasp on his reddening plump lips while he lazily guides your movements on his lap, triggering a flood of pleasure wash over you.

Slender, pale, and long fingers reached over to snatch another blunt, taking a long drag before the very same fingers of the opposite hand takes the back of your neck so he can pull you closer to his lips. He breathes the smoke out of his mouth into yours, connecting your lips once again.

Despite the distinct scent of the drug, you taste a tinge of sweetness on your tongue as his own massages yours. Rocking your hips harder to his forces a moan out of you, making your fingers curl around his lengthy hair. You pull away, muttering a small give me a minute to him. Leaning back on the steering wheel, you watch him while you try to control your ragged breathing.

His hair is long. Long enough that it falls softly all the way to his eyes and cheeks, the ends brushing his really pale skin. With your earlier statement, he just shrugged with the same unchanging look of nonchalance in his eyes—proceeding to take drags out of his blunt. His beautifully shaped eyes now bloodshot and shiny with moisture.

He's almost like a vampire, now that you think about it. So beautiful. Such pale skin but such dark hair. Sharp gaze but soft lips. Intoxicating scent but still so sweet.

The most similar thing between him and vampires, you thought, is the way he sucks all the life out of you. Drying you out and taking all your light.

This man has corrupted you more than you're willing to admit.

You opened your mouth to say something when the blaring ring of his phone makes you jump. His eyes glanced over the source before grabbing it with a sigh and scanning the monitor. You didn't even need to ask who it is. You're very well aware who it is, and why he never hesitated to answer.

When it comes to you, it always takes a lot of rings and missed calls before he picks up, though. You understand. You tell him you do, you always will.

He doesn't pick a call up on the first ring unless it's his girl. Astumu whispered as if he heard you ponder about the caller in your head one night when you were drinking with him in a bar. Loves her a lot. Probably too much.

The alarms rang in your head that night, no matter how much you tried to ignore it. So annoying but at the same time so painful. You didn't know how to turn it off and you wish every single time you could.

"Darling," He whispered with such a loving voice, one you never heard from him when he answers your calls. Your heart ached but you knew better than to confront him about it. Instead you cry in the arms of the twinss—more on Atsumu's, since Osamu takes you through an hour long lecture of why you should have known better.

You know that much, you think.

You shouldn't have let yourself get dragged in this stupid situation, craving a taken man and his touches. Letting him in on your secrets even when he barely lets you get a peak in his.

"I miss you too, my love.. Oh?.. I'll be home soon." He speaks in pauses as he lets her finish speaking first. You close your eyes to prevent the liquid threatening to spill out, taking a deep breath before slowly lifting yourself from his lap to the passenger seat. His eyes widened a millimeter—almost as if he cares what you do, when he noticed you getting off him without having to tell you. You noticed he ended his call with her and you refuse to look back at him. If you do, you are sure of another sleepless night.

Another sleepless night of asking yourself what went wrong and if he ever regretted his decisions— maybe he, too, spend the night wide awake asking himself why he brushed off every single detail of the past like it never existed, why he acts like you're a stranger he met for the very first time when both of you coincidentally takes the seat next to each other on a bar, why he never gave you an explanation of what happened that day.

Cold fingers hook under your chin, slowly turning your head to the left. He leans over the center console, connecting his lips with the soft skin of your neck, making you exhale out at the feeling of him sucking all the reason in you again. He runs his tongue wet on your collarbones, creating a glistening trail.

"I'll see you soon?" He whispered on the crook of your neck, nibbling it a little with his teeth. The bruises he leave on your skin another reminder that everything is real.

You just hum with a nod, cupping his jaw and slowly pulling him away from you with a small smile. One of his bangs fell in the middle of his face—you reached up to brush it away.

So many unspoken words from you. Too many. You wonder if he has anything he's holding back to say too as his eyes linger on you a second longer than usual. Or maybe you're just desperately reading into the lines again, like what Osamu said way too many times.

"Rin, what.. what are we?" Every parting is like this, like a new way of saying goodbye that you both developed. You just needed to be reminded, to wake up from whatever delusions you're starting to have.

"Nothing." He replies as flatly as all the other times before. Not a hint of emotion – no amusement or remorse.

You swallow, letting your hands fall to your sides. On the verge of turning around and reaching the door, his voice echoes once again. "How many times are you gonna ask me this?"

Until you start feeling something.

You thought to yourself. Anger, disgust, love, hatred, adoration, anything. You just want him to feel something. Prove to yourself and everyone else that you're not just a tool to him.

"Sorry. Slipped out of habit." You settle for that response now. No point having a conversation with him about this.

"You don't have to leave right away, I can still drive you home."

Losing all the strength to refuse, you found yourself just agreeing with him. Why the fuck are you even so upset to begin with? You knew what you signed up for. You knew about the girl. You saw him with her in the very same bar a few nights ago. Watched how much attention he gives her, how tightly he holds her.

Of course, you knew about the girl. Your past with her woven in a way no one will be able to deny, and she knows it too, as much as Suna and the twins do. How could you forget? Everything to you was clear as day, from the very first day to the last. Rintarou knows it hurts you more this way, but he never bothers to hide it from you—how he chose her over you.

"I'll break your heart by the end of this, baby." He warns you as you feel his length slip inside you, making you moan out in ecstasy.

"I don't care." You pant, grabbing him by the hips as a way of telling him to go faster.

Looking back, maybe you shouldn't have been so foolish and say that. Now, you're paying the price. Now, your exit has been sealed.

The moment you met him, you forgot everything – your reason, pride, dignity, loyalty, sense, self-love. You hate how intoxicates you like the drugs on his backseat and yet you can't stop. You wonder if he knows how you feel about him—how you still feel about him. If he notices the way your eyes would light up when you see him or the way you would wrap your arms so tightly like you're afraid of letting him go.

The car stopped soon after and you looked out the window to find yourself in front of your house. You collected your things and fastened the clasp on your sandals then opened the door, stepping a foot outside when he once again stops you by the wrist.

"I'll call you soon. I promise."

"I'll be waiting." You wriggle out of his grip without looking back, stepping your remaining foot out to join with the other as you stand up to leave. "Take care, Rintarou."

"You too, baby." The sound of his tires grow fainter by the second as he speeds off to his and his girlfriend's shared apartment and it was so loud, you couldn't tell if there was a strain on his voice when he said that or if you just imagined it again in your head.

You didn't notice the sobs wrecking your body. Not until you feel warm droplets fall to your open palms in front of you. You clutched your phone tightly, holding it to your chest.

You can only hope the next call comes soon, interrupting the continuous flow of the songs on your phone—the very records that remind you of what you never had—or perhaps, if things went a different turn; what you could've had with him.

[goldenretriever-nicknelson]

Vacation Part 2 ~ Prague [P.P]

Series Masterlist || Main Masterlist

A/n: Chapter 2 is here! I'm still working on 3 and I'll hopefully have it done in time for next week. I'm so grateful for the response from this small series and I'm excited that you all like it! This chapter has more angst in it and yes I was slightly inspired by To all the boys I've loved before haha.

Thank you to @eeyore101247 for beta reading this chapter for me at the last minute! I love you Lolo!

WC: 5.8k

Warnings: Angst, mentions of slut-shaming and bullying, high school sucks, mentions of Tony and grief but also cute romantic fluff cause we love to see it.

The end of the class’ time in Italy arrived too soon in Peter’s opinion. He’d had so much fun with you, he’d almost forgotten entirely about his plan. Almost. There was still a part of him drawn to MJ and still felt jealous when she was with Brad which started to happen more often.

And yet he always felt himself drawn back to you.

Peter sighed as he finished packing his bags, his head reeling from everything until he heard a knock on the door. Mostly everyone had left the hotel in a hurry but Ned had stayed with Peter.

“You got a package.” He handed Peter the wrapped package and looked at him with a furrowed brow. “Do you think it’s a bomb or something?”

Peter looked at his best friend in bewilderment. “Well I do now!”

“I’m sure it’s not.” Ned shook his head, eying the package carefully. Peter cautiously looked at Ned and back at the parcel in his hands. He knew this vacation had been too good to be true. He carefully looked at the writing and noticed a shield logo in the corner.

“It’s from SHIELD.” Peter spoke carefully as he opened the wrapping, he was hoping maybe for a cool badge or something but instead there was only a glasses case. Ned and him exchanged a look before opening the case.

There inside of the wooden casing was a pair of glasses, they looked mostly ordinary with a blue shaded tint to the lenses like the kind Tony would wear. Peter felt a strange kind of feeling as he looked at them, it was a mix of grief and disappointment, are these old glasses really the only thing Tony had left for him?

“Awesome!” Ned looked over Peter’s shoulder at the glasses. “Try them on!”

Peter thought about it before quickly closing the case and putting it in his backpack, shaking his head. “We’ll be late for the flight.”

“Oh you didn’t hear?” Ned gave Peter a look who shrugged in return. “We’re going by coach now. Mr Harrington said we got an upgrade to Prague.”

“What about Paris?!” Peter exclaimed, looking at Ned with wide eyes.

“Well Mr Harrington and Mr Dell kind of got into an argument about whether it was Prague or Paris we were meant to be going to. Turns out Mr Harrington was supposed to book Paris but he booked Prague instead.” Ned explained, shaking his head.

Peter sighed and furrowed his brow, a coach didn’t sound much fun but at least Peter didn’t have to worry about flying. He wasn’t sure if there were any romantic spots in Prague but it was nothing a quick internet search couldn’t fix. It’s not like his plan was going according anyway.

He grabbed his bags and walked down to where the rest of the class were already boarding a large coach.

Everyone was already seated by the time Peter got on. MJ was with Brad, Ned was with Betty and you were with one of your friends. The only free seat was next to Flash and Peter preferred the option of sitting by himself at the back, he could do with the peace and quiet anyway.

You gave him a smile as he walked past and he returned it before taking his seat, almost falling into it as the driver started down the road. Peter rested his head against the window and took out his earphones, noticing the case next to them. He played his music as he took out the case and looked at the glasses again.

He picked them up and tried them on, waiting for something to happen but nothing did. He laughed dryly and shook his head, going to take them off before he noticed a Stark industries business card at the bottom of the case.

For the next Tony Stark, I trust you. Say EDITH.

Peter read the message aloud and jumped as the glasses flashed blue, a female voice talking to him much like the one he had in his suit. An interface loaded in front of him, showing a scan of his face.

“Retinal and biometric scan completed.”

“Hello?”

“Hello Peter. I am EDITH, Tony Stark’s augmented reality security and defence system.”

Peter adjusted the glasses and smiled, Tony had given him an AI with access to all of his protocols. He almost couldn’t believe that he had trusted him with that kind of access.

“EDITH stands for even dead I’m the hero. Tony loved his acronyms.”

“Yeah he did.” Peter smiled fondly, remembering the time he had tried to make up some of his own but had never quite hit the mark.

“I have access to the entire Stark global security network including multiple defence satellites and backdoors to all major telecommunication networks.”

Peter looked around as screens loaded before him of what his classmates and teachers were up to on their phones including Mr Dell researching the history of witchcraft. Ned and Betty were texting each other even though they were sat together.

“Woah.” Peter couldn’t get over how cool this was to have all of this access at his fingertips. He looked over at MJ wondering if she was texting before changing his mind, knowing it would be wrong. His eyes landed on where you sat and your texts showed before him. Ned wasn’t the only one Betty was texting.

Y/n: I really like him.

Betty: I know but I’m pretty sure he likes MJ :/

Peter could feel his heart racing. He wanted so badly to tell you Betty was wrong but the truth was he didn’t know anymore.

You looked over at MJ and Brad, biting your lip before glancing at Peter. He quickly looked away from you, his eyes looking over towards MJ on accident. He didn’t see the way your face fell but he did see the last text you sent to Betty.

Y/n: Yeah, you’re right.

Peter sighed and put his head in his hands, wanting to scream into oblivion.

“Pete, everything okay?”

He quickly looked up at the sound of your voice and nodded, worrying that somehow you knew he had been spying. He tried to quickly think of something to say as you sat next to him, looking worried and saddened.

A moment’s silence passed between the both of you, neither sure of what to say. The only sound came from the chatters of the bus and the passing scenery outside.

“I like your glasses. Are they new?” You smiled, breaking the silence as you admired the new frames and the eyes underneath them. Peter slowly nodded and took them off.

“Y-yeah, they were a gift.” He gave you a small smile and put them back in the case. You noticed the Stark industries logo but didn’t say anything more on the topic. You knew how much Tony had meant to Peter.

After the blip when everyone returned to their old lives, you noticed Peter wasn’t the same person. He seemed sadder and lost, struggling to pay attention even in lessons he loved and sometimes he’d have to excuse himself quickly from the classroom. You had followed him once and found him on the floor, sobbing into his hands. He didn’t even register it was you that had hugged him until he looked up and mumbled an apology.

Seeing him that way broke your heart and the last thing you wanted to cause was more sadness for him when he was meant to be enjoying himself.

“I think they look good on you.”

Peter blushed and smiled, bowing his head shyly. “Thank you.”

You smiled back and nodded, deciding to listen to your music and handing Peter an earphone. He looked surprised at the gesture but took it anyway and listened to your music, a wide smile gracing his lips as you both shared the sweet moment together.

It stayed like that for the rest of the journey, both of you enjoying each other's company just as you had done in Venice. Peter couldn't get rid of the smile from his face until they stopped for a restroom break and he saw Brad and MJ holding hands as they got off the bus. His whole face fell which didn't go unnoticed by you.

Peter gave you a quick goodbye before going after Ned, in need of his best friend’s advice. You meekly said a goodbye before sighing and grabbing your things. Your eyes landed on a small journal on Peter’s seat that he must have left behind.

You know you shouldn’t have looked but the temptation was biting away at you. It was only just a peek, you told yourself. You smiled as you saw some doodles scribbled on the pages, chemical equations for something called web fluid (probably some cool science thing he was working on) and a section dedicated to The plan.

Intrigued of what the plan entailed you read ahead and with each written word the jealousy in your heart grew and the sadness broke your heart. Peter was planning to romance MJ with gifts and a whole speech he had written out in detail. Everything was planned and you were nothing more than a distraction. You even noticed that in one of Peter’s doodles he had written MJ or Y/n???

*~*~*~*

“I swear it was in here.” Peter sighed as he searched his bag for his journal, the one that held all his personal thoughts and feelings. Ned had tried to help him look but the mission was futile.

“It will turn up. Maybe you just left it on the bus.”

Peter nodded and sighed heavily, zipping his backpack up and throwing it back on his shoulders. He spotted a nice little souvenir for Morgan and paid for it before leaving the small store. He took a moment to look around where they had stopped since the rest of the group were taking their time and as he got closer to a small empty bathroom he could hear the sound of someone crying.

He gently knocked on the door to make sure that whoever it was was okay before being sharply told to go away. Peter felt even worse as he recognised your voice. He wondered what had happened since she’d been fine when he last saw her.

“y/n?”

“Peter just leave me alone, please.” Your voice cracked as you spoke, small sniffles escaping you as you sat on the edge of the closed toilet seat.

“You know I can’t do that.” He rested his head against the door and sighed softly, willing to wait for you until you came out.

“I’m trying to make things easier for you!”

Peter hummed in confusion before something slid out from underneath the door, his journal.

“Go be with MJ.”

“Y/n no..” He sighed and resisted the urge to bang his head against the door. “I-” He didn’t even know how to explain but he did know one thing. “It doesn’t matter what it says in there. I’ve had so much fun with you on this trip and I know now that you can’t plan everything, you can’t plan falling in love because it just happens.”

As Peter spoke he realised that his words were truer than they had ever been, he was falling for you and he couldn’t stop himself. He didn’t want to stop. He didn’t care about his plan anymore and yes it still hurt when MJ was with Brad but it was nothing compared to the happiness he felt when he was with you.

The world felt silent around the both of you as Peter’s words processed. You felt even more confused than before but you could also feel something else, hope. Peter listened to your breathing and the small sniffles that still came from behind the door.

“I’m gonna head back onto the bus. I got cookies if you wanna share.”

You held back a giggle and rolled your eyes fondly before opening the bathroom door and wiping your eyes free of tears.

“They better be chocolate chip.”

“Is there any other kind?”

You and Peter both laughed as you got back on the bus, already heading to the back together to find your seats. Peter put his journal away out of sight and smiled at you, taking out the cookies he had brought and offering one to you. It did nothing to ease the ache still in your heart but it did fill your stomach and no matter what you still liked being in Peter’s company.

*~*~*~*

The hotel for Prague turned out to be a lot better than the one they had stayed in during their time in Venice. Mr Harrington said that an anonymous someone had given them an upgrade which made Peter’s Spidey senses tingle. Maybe he was just being paranoid but he also knew that things like this were usually too good to be true.

Everyone was shown to their room, all except for Peter who got held back at reception by the lady at the desk.

“He said to leave this here for you when you arrived Mr Parker.”

Peter looked at her with confusion as he took the envelope, a familiar handwriting scrawled on top. His heart suddenly felt heavy but he pushed the resurfacing feelings of grief aside and nodded, making his way up to his room.

He could hear through the door that Ned and Betty were already inside making cutesy talk while soft music played. Whilst Peter loved his friends, he wanted to go somewhere quiet and open the letter. His mind had already decided where to go as he made his way towards the room number he needed and knocked.

The door opened to reveal your beautiful smile which already made Peter feel a sense of calm. He looked around for your suit buddy and sighed in relief as the room was empty.

“Can I come in?”

You nodded without hesitation, seeing the slight pain on Peter’s face and brought him to sit down on one of the comfy twin beds. He held the letter in slightly shaky hands and kept his eyes on it. You spotted the familiar logo on the envelope, the same that was on Peter’s glasses case and realised.

“Is that from-?”

“Mhm.” Peter nodded, keeping his lips in a tight thin line as he contemplated opening it. His mind was running a mile a minute with so many thoughts. He’d gotten the glasses from Tony and that was enough for him even if the card had been a bit of a riddle. He wasn’t sure if he could handle a letter too.

“Can you open it?” Peter looked at you pleadingly as he handed you the letter, his hands still visibly shaking. You hesitated before nodding and carefully opened the envelope, reading the letter aloud.

Dear Peter,

I’m writing this in case all goes well and we manage to restore normality, at least what once was. I know you’re going to do great things and maybe you’ll make mistakes along the way but that’s part of being human kid. God knows I made more than I can count.

I wanted to make your senior year as awesome as it should be so if you’re reading this then you made it kid. I don’t remember much of my last year of high school but I wanted to make sure you did so make the most of it and don’t worry about any extracurriculars on your trip.

I know you’ll make me proud Peter cause you already do. Now go have fun and don’t do anything I would do or anything I wouldn’t do. Remember the little grey area is where you operate.

Anonymous someone.

Peter laughed and sniffled as you finished, wiping his eyes as tears had started to fall. You quickly put the letter down and wrapped your arms around him, hugging him close.

“It’s okay.”

He nodded against your shoulder as a few more tears fell, his fingers clinging onto your sweater. Peter wasn’t sure whether to smile or cry more at the words from his mentor so he did both. He reread the letter again and again that night, feeling the weight on his heart ease. Tony had upgraded his class trip for him probably through Happy to make sure Peter had a nice time and he had also said he was proud of him. That hit Peter the most and it was what he needed to hear in that moment.

You both stayed like that for a few minutes as Peter’s breathing calmed, his tears reducing to sniffles. You rubbed his back comfortingly and played with his curls which seemed to relax Peter more as he stayed in your arms.

When you both pulled away neither was sure of what to say. Peter focused on clearing his face of tears and running a hand through his messy curls whilst you played with the sleeves of your sweater. You wished you could ask Peter to stay the night, after all your roommate for the trip had gone home with food poisoning.

Little did you know Peter was thinking the same thoughts, knowing Ned and Betty would probably still be in his room or go to hers. Sometimes they spooned and stayed up till late hours of the night talking, he wasn’t sure he could deal with that right now and he liked being in your company.

“Do you want to-?”

“Can I-?”

You both laughed as you spoke over each other, exchanging a back and forth argument of who should speak first. Peter insisted you speak and gave you a small smile.

You nodded and took a deep breath before looking into those familiar warm, honey coloured eyes. “Do you want to stay here tonight? There’s two beds and I heard there’s a Star Wars Marathon on tv.”

Peter’s smile widened, his eyes crinkling with happiness as he nodded. “I’d love to.”

The night passed by in a blur as you and Peter stayed up to watch his favourite movies, even having ordered some food from room service which had apparently also been covered by Stark industries. Just like in Venice, you laughed and joked and enjoyed each other’s company, smiling as you saw Peter enjoying himself.

There was still a hurt from earlier knowing how much he had wanted to be with MJ and you knew they would work together as a couple, you’d seen them in decathlon together but MJ seemed to be enjoying time with Brad and Peter was here with you. A warm flutter of butterflies exploded in your stomach as you met his gaze, he offered his warm smile and offered you some of his popcorn to which you nodded.

Maybe your chance wasn’t so dead after all.

Just as you were about to wind down for the night, it being way past midnight, Peter looked at you with a hesitant smile.

“Hey Y/n?”

You looked up at him in response, picking up some popcorn from your competition to see who could throw and catch the most in their mouths (Peter had won).

“I- um would you-” Peter stuttered over his words as they got caught on his tongue. He cleared his throat and you bit back a smile at how utterly cute he was. “There’s this big carnival tomorrow and I was hoping maybe w-we could go together?”

His cheeks flushed pink as he finally asked the question he’d been dying to ask all night, his eyes too scared to look at your reaction.

“Peter,” You walked over and cupped his cheeks, forcing him to look at you. He relaxed at seeing the wide smile on your face. “I would love to go with you.”

His smile widened to match yours and a wave of relief washed over him. “That’s great.” He gave a chuckle and blushed as you delicately kissed his cheek before getting into your bed for the night.

“Just to make sure I meant like a date.” Peter clarified, worried about getting put into the friendzone.

You giggled and smiled at him from your bed. “I know Pete. It’s a date.” You winked at him before turning off the light and laying back, ready to fall asleep with a wide smile on your face.

Peter smiled wide as he laid in bed, the sheets and mattress softer than the last one he had slept on. Everything finally seemed to be falling into place, it wasn’t as Peter had imagined but it was far better.

*~*~*~*~*~*

The next morning Peter woke up feeling more refreshed than he had felt in a long time. The sun was shining over Prague and even Peter felt brighter in himself. He looked over at your bed and smiled as he found you still asleep, snoring softly.

Peter’s whole heart leapt at the sight and he let out a happy sigh as he thought about last night. You had comforted him and held him and had even agreed to go on a date with him tonight. He felt like the luckiest human alive which made him want to do a little dance in his bed as he thought about it.

“What are you doing?”

Peter blushed and looked over to see that you were now awake and looking at him with an amused smile.

“Uh nothing.” He laughed and got out of bed, gathering the letter and his shoes. You giggled as you watched him accidentally grab your sneakers before switching them for his own. “I better get going. Don’t want Mr Harrington to call an emergency buddy meeting again.”

You laughed and agreed with a nod, remembering the last one at the airport when Mr Harrington had panicked the whole group when he thought Ned had gone missing only to see he was right behind him.

Peter smiled at you as he opened the door, “I’ll see you later?”

You nodded and smiled wide, “Don’t be late Parker.”

He shook his head and laughed as he left, an unwavering smile on his face as he headed back to his room. Peter didn’t notice Flash see him leave your room with a smile and his shoes in hand nor the phone recording him.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Peter took a deep breath as he stood in front of the mirror, brushing down his shirt as he bit his lip. “I’m not sure.”

Ned sighed and flopped back onto his bed. “Peter, this is the 7th shirt you’ve tried on! You look fine!” He knew as soon as he uttered the last word that Peter would rummage through his suitcase yet again for the perfect shirt.

10 minutes later, Peter was finally ready for his date, much to Ned’s relief. He watched as Peter gave himself a pep talk in the mirror, mumbling in the hopes Ned couldn’t hear him.

“Okay here’s the plan-”

Ned was just about to tell Peter enough with his plans before the door opened and MJ walked in.

“Hey losers.”

“Have you ever heard of knocking?” Ned looked at her and raised his brow. MJ shrugged in response and sat down on Peter’s vacant bed. She looked at him as he turned back to the mirror and tried to tame his messy curls.

“So you and Y/n huh?” MJ noted with a smirk, stealing some of the gummy worms that Peter had brought for the trip. He turned around so quickly, he almost got whiplash.

“What?! I-” Peter was at a loss for words, he knew news spread quickly at Midtown but how had anyone found out in one night. “We’re not really a thing yet.” He blushed and avoided his friends’ gazes.

“Oh really? Then why did Flash see you leave her room last night in the same clothes as yesterday.” MJ smirked again and threw a gummy worm at Peter who looked at her with wide eyes.

“I just- I stayed in her room last night.” He admitted, his cheeks burning red as Ned and MJ didn’t look convinced. “But nothing happened!”

Ned and MJ shared a sympathetic look as they saw Peter’s distress grow at the rumor. He picked up his phone and panicked as he saw the midtown gossip website showing a video of him leaving your room. Before he could panic anymore Peter quickly made his way to the other side of the hotel floor and banged on Flash’s door.

“Woah penis what-?”

“Take it down.” Peter didn’t disguise his anger as Flash opened the door.

“What?”

“The video you took last night Flash. Please take it down.” Peter lowered his voice and pleaded. He knew this would affect you as soon as you saw it and the last thing he wanted was for you to get hurt because of him. Not again.

“Why? Don’t want everyone to know you’re not a virgin anymore?” Flash smirked and laughed before noticing the anger grow once more on Peter’s face. “The video’s out of my control. Sorry dude.”

Flash closed the door, not sounding sorry at all. Peter sighed and leaned against the wall, resting his head back. Everywhere around him classmates were getting ready for the carnival, whispering behind his back and giving him looks, he wasn’t sure if they were impressed looks or disgusted ones but either way he didn’t like them.

Peter usually lied low so he could avoid things like this and stay out of the rumor mill. He hated rumors and he hated being a part of them even more. Just as he was contemplating messaging Happy to see if he could do something, he heard a door open and looked up.

You walked out of your room, looking as beautiful as ever and Peter swear his heart almost dropped out of his stomach at the sight as the butterflies ran rampant in his stomach. You looked around before catching his gaze and smiling.

“Hey Pete.”

For a moment, Peter forgot how to form words, too focused on how beautiful you looked as you smiled. His throat felt dry and his hands felt clammy to the touch.

“H-hi.” He finally managed to say, his heart racing as you smiled wider and giggled.

“I was just coming to meet you. Are you ready to go?”

Peter thought back to the video circulating his classmates phones and he assumed you hadn’t seen it. He knew he should’ve told you there and then but he didn’t want to ruin your date or hurt you so he kept his lips sealed.

He nodded and gave you a small smile, heading out of the hotel with you. Your hands touched briefly as you walked and Peter almost took your hand in his before pulling away as he chickened out. You tried not to show your disappointment and offered Peter a smile.

The streets of Prague were full of life and celebration, everyone wearing bright colours and dancing along the streets as loud music played. Peter allowed himself to be distracted at the joy of the city before your hand slipped into his, catching him by surprise.

You gave his hand a squeeze and smiled, “So we don’t lose each other.” It was partially the truth but you mostly just wanted to hold his hand. Peter smiled and nodded but you could tell something was wrong.

It wasn’t just the rumour mill that was getting to Peter, the loud noises and brightness was causing his heightened senses to overload. He began to feel on edge and his palms grew even sweatier than before.

“Peter are you okay?”

He looked at you and bit his lip, shaking his head slowly. You squeezed his hand comfortingly and nodded, seemingly understanding what needed to be done as you led him over to the Ferris wheel.

Peter sighed in relief as you and him both got seated, your hands still interlinked as the door shut to the cart you were in.

“I hate crowds too.” You admitted with a soft blush and met his gaze. Peter smiled softly and squeezed your hand like you had done to his.

The wheel moved slowly allowing you both to enjoy the moment and the sights of the city. Peter knew that he didn’t need to fill the silence or try to talk, you were just there for each other as you had been last night and the whole trip.

Music from the streets filled the silence of the night as you and Peter looked out at the stars glittering in the night sky. It was right as you reached the peak of the wheel that Peter finally broke the silence.

“I really like you Y/n.”

You blushed and turned to Peter, noticing the redness of his cheeks and the staggered breaths escaping his lips. He looked straight ahead for a few moments before he felt your hand grip tighter onto his and saw your smile from the corner of his eye.

“I really like you too Peter.”

He smiled wide, mirroring yours before noticing your face fall just as fast.

“But I don’t want to be second best.”

Peter’s heart broke at her words, knowing she was thinking back to his journal. He shook his head and quickly cupped your cheeks in his hands, meeting your gaze lovingly.

“You’re not second best Y/n. You never were and you never will be. The truth is I’ve always liked you but I just- I never thought I would be lucky enough to have a chance with you.”

You smiled at the genuinity in Peter’s voice and his warm brown eyes that pulled you in ever closer until your lips were almost touching. “Always liked me huh?”

Peter nodded and smiled wide, the blush on his cheeks becoming brighter as he looked down at your lips.

“C-can I kiss you?”

“I thought you’d never ask.”

You smiled as Peter’s lips finally met your own, after years of pining and wondering what if. Peter’s lips were soft and tasted like the cotton candy you had shared earlier. Your lips were sweeter than Peter had ever imagined, if that was possible.

Neither of you wanted the kiss to end but you could feel the need for air increasing in your lungs. You were the first one to pull back, catching your breath as you leaned your forehead against Peter’s. He chuckled softly and smiled so wide that his eyes crinkled.

“Woah.”

You nodded and pecked his lips once more with a giggle. The blush on your cheeks was rivalling Peter’s now as you noticed the ride was soon coming to an end. Peter looked disappointed before quickly paying for another ride.

“I hope you did that so you can kiss me again.” You smiled coyly and looped your arms around Peter’s neck.

“Maybe.” He shrugged and laughed before leaning in to kiss you again but this time he hesitated as he saw the looks from some of his classmates. The reminder hitting him like a train.

“Pete? What’s wrong?” Your fingers played with the curls at the nape of his neck as the wheel started to move again. Peter visibly gulped and his mood fell as he looked back at you.

“There’s something I have to tell you.”

You bit your lip in worry and nodded, having a feeling you knew what Peter was going to say.

“Pete I know.”

“You do?”

You giggled and nodded again, kissing his cheek and leaning in close. Peter blushed and looked guilty, his eyes avoiding yours.

“You being Spider-Man doesn’t bother me.”

Peter’s blood ran cold and he quickly shifted away, laughing in pretend disbelief. “I-What?! No. I-I’m not Spider-Man!”

You looked knowingly at him and rubbed his arm, taking his hand back in yours. “Peter it’s okay, i think it’s cool.” You smiled but Peter still sat in denial, shaking his head.

“I-” He gulped and sighed, biting his lip. “Is it that obvious?”

“No but I’ve had a crush on your for a while now and I’m not dumb Peter. The glasses and the letter from Iron Man. And then there was Washington. I just know you Peter.” You blushed and fidgeted with your hands, feeling embarrassed to admit your crush even though you had only kissed him 5 seconds ago.

Peter smiled, finding it endearing that you knew him and had paid attention to him all this time. He leaned back in close to you and rested his hand on yours.

“Oh my god!” You gasped, laughing as Peter was taken aback at your exclamation. “I’m dating a freaking superhero!” You giggled with Peter before kissing him again. The kiss was even more perfect than the last as your lips began to learn and memorise each other.

*~*~*~*~*

The carnival livened up even more as the night went on. The music became louder and the people got more drunk, something that might have made Peter annoyed but nothing could ruin his mood right now. He could still taste the sweetness of your lips on his and he just couldn’t get enough.

You giggled as Peter kissed your lips again after winning you a gigantic teddy bear. He smiled wide and giggled with you, the sound like music to your ears. You hugged the bear tight to your chest after choosing to name it Spidey which made Peter blush.

“This is so amazing.” You remarked as you took a moment to enjoy the scenery surrounding you. Peter sat with you on a nearby bench and nodded, hesitantly wrapping his arm around you. He smiled as you leaned into his side with a happy sigh. The moment was perfect and Peter was sure nothing could ruin it.

You jumped a little as your phone buzzed before pulling it from your pocket. Peter smiled to himself as he saw Spider-Man was the wallpaper on your phone. You blushed and tried to quickly hide it as you opened the message from Betty.

Peter turned his eyes towards the street to give you some privacy, the last thing he wanted you to think was that he was reading your texts (again).

He only looked back at you as you slowly pulled away from his arms, clutching your phone in your hands and only then did Peter notice that Betty had sent you the video of him leaving your room last night. You were scrolling through the comments and Peter saw that amongst the nice or gossiping comments that were hurtful ones calling you names.

“Y/n I-”

You shook your head and bit your lip, quickly locking your phone. You noticed a group of girls from your class staring at you and giggling, whispering in each other's ears.

“I have to go.” You sniffled as you grabbed your bag and quickly walked back to the hotel, ignoring Peter’s calls of your name. He sighed and tried to chase after you but within seconds he had lost you in the crowd and maybe for good this time.

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[rattyoakenbitch]

❝𝐬𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐝❞ ─ 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐢𝐝

oh, you're cold as ice, baby. i don't wanna fight, baby. it's like i told you; if you stay, i'll stay

❥ content ; gn reader, angst, happy ending

❥ warnings ; toxicity, drinking, strong language, big but legal age gap, steamy makeout session

❥ synopsis ; after a series of stressful events, you find yourself drinking again. unfortunately, so does spencer.

❥ a/n ; none !

With a heavy, bone-tired sigh, Spencer stepped out of the elevator, making a beeline towards his apartment. He stopped outside the door, bringing his hand to his head. He ran it through his long, textured waves, his fingers getting stuck at the strands tangled together.

Spencer stayed like that, nervously idling outside his apartment. The apartment he shared with you.

Spencer had traveled to California for a case with his team prior. It had been days, if not a week since he had actually seen or talked to you. The day of his departure, you weren't exactly on the best of terms.

You loved Spencer. You didn't doubt it for a second. You would have left him long ago if you didn't. Still, your relationship wasn't perfect. You were both very different, career wise. You were an aspiring photographer, and worked at a local coffee shop on the side. Spencer worked at the BAU. Very different. You had just graduated from college when you met Spencer, and, despite the fact that he was almost ten years older, you hit it off and eventually began dating. Though your messy, inconsistent schedules got in the way of any quality time you could spend together, neither of you decided to go your seperate ways. You didn't want to. You were stubborn. So was Spencer. Not because he was desperate. Hell, he didn't even need to try to get girls. He was practically a pussy magnet.

But he chose you. And you chose him. Because you were both in love. Real love, and that's rare.

It still didn't change the fact that you were bothered by Spencer's lack of presence. You openly voiced your frustration over it several times, but you eventually learned to accept that your relationship would never be normal like that. As long as there were bad guys fucking shit up, Spencer would have no time being lovey-dovey.

Which is why Spencer felt uneasy, afraid of what he'd find at the other side of the door. Would you still greet him with open arms? Or would you shun him?

Well, you did neither.

Your eyes were glued to the screen in front of you, but you weren't mentally present. Which is also why you didn't notice Spencer walk in, his jaw hanging open.

The first thing he noticed were the crushed up cans dumped across the floor, along with broken glass bottles, identical to the one you held in your hand.

The apartment was void of any light, save for the dim illumination the TV screen emitted. Spencer almost didn't notice you in the darkness. You were curled up on the corner of the couch, your eyes, again, never once leaving the screen. Of course, the TV didn't provide enough light for Spencer to make out any your features, but he knew it was you.

"Y-You're drinking again?!" was the first thing Spencer could blurt out, his mind racing with thoughts. You jumped up from your spot on the couch, your heartbeat speeding up at the abrupt noise. You clumsily leaned over to the side table, switching on the lamp. The sudden brightness stung, causing tears to well in your bloodshot eyes.

"Ah - shit," you mumbled, rubbing your eyes. "Hello to you, too. I didn't even hear you come in."

"No, you didn't! What is all this?! What-" Spencer was at a loss for words. He scanned you from head to toe, not believing his eyes. Your hair was unkempt, to put it lightly. The dark circles under your tired eyes seemed to have become a deeper shade since the last time he had seen. Your lips were chapped, but wet with alcohol that also stained your clothes.

"Why?" was all Spencer managed to get out.

You shrugged your shoulders. "Dunno, got a little lonely and bored.." If it weren't for the alcohol, you don't know if you'd be able to remain calm in a situation like this.

"God! You could have stayed with family - I don't know! Just look at the place! Have you even left the apartment at all?"

"How can I stay with family when my only family is states away and constantly traveling?!" you finally snapped angrily.

"Is this what this is about?" Spencer said softly, the realization hitting him like a ton of bricks. He looked away from your hard stare, afraid of the guilt he'd feel.

You stuck out your bottom lip in a mocking pout. "Figure it out, genius boy."

"Watch it," Spencer snapped, but you merely rolled your eyes at him.

"You're not my dad. You're barely a boyfriend! You don't order me around," you sneered, watching a flash of pain spread across Spencer's face. But he was quick to compose himself, playing the calm, peace maker.

"Look, we can discuss this tomorrow when we're both rested and sober."

"Oh, really? The last time we made plans, you had to leave. It's all you know."

"Well what do you want me to do?! Do you want me to quit my job?!"

"I don't know, Spencer! I don't know anything, anymore!" you shouted back. Your head began to spin, tears blurring your vision and then you were on the floor, drunkenly grabbing at the air for support. Spencer rushed to your side, attempting to help, only for you to shove him back, harder than you probably intended. Now you were both a mess on the floor, crying and mumbling curses.

Spencer crawled towards you, clasping your hand in his. "Let me help, sweetheart. S'all I wanna do."

"I don't need your damn help," you scowled, hot tears still spilling down your flushed cheeks. You placed your free hand on his chest, but didn't try pushing him away. "I don't want it.. And I don't want you."

Spencer felt his heart ache at the statement, but he knew it was a lie. A facade.

"I know you don't mean that."

"Well you didn't mean it when you said 'I love you' so I guess we're both liars," you scoffed pitifully.

"I meant it, Y/N, and you know it." You remained silent. "I love you. I really do."

"No, just shut up and this'll be easier."

Tired of your attitude, Spencer gripped your chin, forcing you to look up at him, your glossy eyes locking with his deep browns.

"Dammit, Y/N, listen to me. I love you, so, so much, that I will put up with your stubborn attitude that I hate so much, because deep down, I know you're the biggest softie. And you love me, too, no matter what you say to get me to believe you don't."

"I don't love you." Lies. "I wish I never met you."

Spencer pressed his forehead against yours, nearly headbutting you with the sudden action. His lips just barely brushed against yours, and you could feel his hot breath fan your face.

"Don't you lie to me."

"I'm not lying. I hate you. I fucking loathe you, Spencer Reid."

"Then why haven't you backed away?" he whispered, his voice laced with hope.

Silence.

"Answer m-"

Just like that, your lips were on his, roughly claiming them while effectively shutting him up. Spencer didn't waste a second kissing you back, returning the same roughness. He slipped his tongue past your bottom lip, tasting the bitter alcohol that tainted them. You let out a quiet moan, hoping, just hoping he didn't hear. But of course he did, and that only encouraged him. He wrapped his arms around you desperately, trying to get as close to you as physically possible. Your bodies pressed up against each other perfectly, fitting together in all the right places and curves like a puzzle piece, made for each other.

And this is where you belonged, tangled up in your lover's arms. You didn't want to part. More than anything, you didn't want to break away. But eventually you had to, your lungs suddenly feeling tight with lack of oxygen.

You buried your head in the crook of Spencer's neck, sobbing out.

"God, I've missed you so much. Please don't leave me again. I love you so much, Spencer." You repeated it like a mantra, afraid Spencer would disappear into thin air if you stopped.

Spencer rubbed circles on your back comfortingly. "Shh, baby, I'm right here. I won't leave. I'm sorry. I love you so much," he cooed. "We'll be okay."

[ming-yu-hao]

Distance Makes the Heart Grow Fonder | Chapter 3

Pairing: fratboy!mingyu x female reader

Word Count: 6k

Synopsis: When you transferred to a different university, you and Wonwoo promised that you would make long distance work. But distance proves to be more difficult than you both originally thought.

This Chapter’s Tags: angst, protected sex, finger sucking, grinding, light choking/spanking/dirty talk, mingyu just being an ass man, riding, cheating obviously

Warning: THIS SERIES IS ABOUT CHEATING. DO NOT READ IF IT MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE!

A/N: Y’ALLLLL I’m sorry this took me forever to upload... I just got super busy but there won’t be as long as a wait for the next chapter! As always feedback is appreciated and I hope you guys like this :)

Chapters: Previous | Next | Masterlist

Your knees quivered beneath you as you pulled the soft fabric of your leggings up your thighs and over your hips. You bent down to pick up your shirt that was still balled up on the floor, and when you stood again you could hear the bed rustle behind you as Mingyu shifted his weight.

Guilt didn't hit you until you slipped your shirt back over your head, fully dressing yourself once again.

What had you done?

Without looking at him, you spoke: "I think I should go now."

He was silent.

You stepped over to the door, your hand about to twist the knob when he finally called out to you.

"Y/N."

You looked at him. He was sitting up on his bed; his dark hair was a mess, hanging over his forehead. His lips were parted like he didn't know what to say.

"Um, don't forget your jacket. It's cold outside." He pointed to your jacket that was still discarded on the floor.

"Oh, thanks," you said with your voice wavering. You quickly picked up the jacket and headed for the door again.

"Text me when you get home, okay?" Mingyu rushed to say. The corners of his mouth quirked up into a thin, awkward smile and you nodded your head in response.

Why did he suddenly care? He used to just be some guy you sat next to in class. When did he want to become your friend? When did he start to become protective over you? Was this all really just because of his half-drunken encounter with you at that party? Did the moment you two shared that night cause him to feel some kind of attachment to you? Thinking about it all made your head spin. Nothing made sense to you anymore.

You turned the knob and cracked open the door when Mingyu spoke again.

"Um, also... you know, if you ever need anything... I'm here for you." His voice shook a bit.

You exhaled. "Thank you."

You slipped out of his room before he could say anything else and stepped down the stairs quietly, attempting to dart out the front door before anyone could see you. There was a small group of people hanging out in the living room like Mingyu had said, their laughter and conversations loud and echoing through the house.

When you reached the bottom of the stairs, you kept your gaze down at your feet while you scanned the floor for your shoes.

"Y/N?" You heard a voice call from behind you.

You huffed out a quiet breath in frustration before turning around with an overly sweet smile on your face. Your eyes landed on Seungcheol.

"Oh, hey! It's weird not seeing Jisoo following you around." You joked.

Seungcheol smiled sheepishly. "Yeah..." He trailed off, looking down at the ground.

"Are you guys dating?" You probed with a raised eyebrow.

"I wanted to talk to you about that, actually." He admitted, making eye contact with you. Curiosity plagued you, and you stared at him expectantly as you waited for him to speak. "I wanna do something special for her when I ask her out... just cause, I don't know, I really like her." He stammered nervously, lowering his voice so no one could eavesdrop.

You gave him a genuine smile. You were happy that Jisoo had found someone that truly liked her. Ever since the beginning of the semester, she had been cycling through an array of terrible guys that used and ghosted her. Seungcheol seemed like a genuinely good person; you trusted him to take care of her.

You brought your hand to your chin as you pondered for a moment. "Well, if I'm being honest, she's, like, a huge hopeless romantic. Loves cheesy romance movies and stuff." You started, "If you took her out to a nice dinner and walked around some really pretty, romantic place after, that'd be her dream come true."

Seungcheol nodded, his eyes glazed over in deep thought as he acknowledged your advice. "Yeah, that sounds like her." He smiled. "Thanks."

You nodded. "So... how did the raffle go?"

"It went really good, actually." He responded, shoving his hands in his pockets. "The money's going to a child psychology organization. I've been doing research with them for a few months now."

Your eyes lit up in interest at his story. "That's really cool. Have you discovered any groundbreaking research yet?" You half-joked.

He chuckled, "I guess a little bit."

A lightbulb suddenly went off in your brain. "Hey, do you think I could interview you about all this research stuff you've done? I need to write an article for class."

Seungcheol shrugged. "Sure."

You spent the next few minutes probing him about how he got involved in the program, what he had been researching, his motivation to study child psychology—all while taking down notes on your phone. He explained to you how he had struggled with anxiety his whole life and wanted to find a way to help others. In the back of your mind, this was all affirming why he was such a good match for Jisoo. He was caring, passionate, charitable. Your heart warmed at the thought of Jisoo finally settling down with someone who was actually a good person.

Your interview came to an end and you thanked Seungcheol for helping you out. He nodded before glancing down at the jacket you were carrying in your arms.

"Were you planning on leaving?" He asked.

"Yeah, I need to go work on homework and stuff." You answered.

He attempted to suppress his smirk by biting his lip. "You and Mingyu didn't get much work done together?" He raised his eyebrows at you.

You felt your heart drop into your stomach. "What?"

"Relax, I'm just kidding." Seungcheol laughed. "He just seemed comfortable with you earlier, you know?"

The tension in your stomach loosened a little as you realized that he didn't actually know what happened between you two. This is exactly what Mingyu was worried about earlier. So it was true that Seungcheol liked to play matchmaker and get involved in everyone else's relationships.

"There's nothing going on between you guys?" Seungcheol questioned after you didn't respond.

You felt your cheeks grow hot with irritation. "No. I have a boyfriend." You said curtly.

Seungcheol's mouth formed an O-shape at the sudden coldness in your tone. "I-I'm sorry, I was just kidding." He quickly apologized.

"It's okay." You sighed. You glanced around for your shoes, avoiding his regretful gaze.

"Well, I really have to get going. Thanks for helping me out." You said as you slipped on your shoes.

He smiled apologetically and walked you over to the door. "See you, Y/N!" He called behind you as you stepped out into the cold.

You buried yourself in work for the next two days. You figured it was easier to just get lost in the flow of doing assignment after assignment rather than to think about what happened.

But no matter what you did, your mind still wandered back to that moment—when your lips finally met Mingyu's, and his body pressed against yours.

The worst part was that you didn't even try to stop him: you had agreed to it, and God, you even thanked him for it! You weren't even sure if you could regret what happened. You hated yourself for betraying Wonwoo's trust, but at the same time you craved attention and affection. Mingyu just happened to be the one that fulfilled your wishes after all this time.

You would never tell Mingyu that, of course. Honestly, you were unsure if you could even face him about it. He could tell that you felt guilty afterwards. If you just finished this stupid project and avoided him for the rest of the semester, he would probably get the hint and leave you alone.

It was Saturday evening when you typed the last words of your article on Seungcheol and his research. You hadn't talked to Mingyu since you left his room on Thursday night, but you needed him to complete his share of the work. Sighing, you picked up your phone and pulled up your messages with him. You quickly explained what kind of pictures he needed to take and told him to send them to you (so you could avoid seeing him anymore than you needed to).

You clicked out of your conversation, and that's when your eyes landed on the messages that were still unread by Wonwoo. You wanted to ask him what he was doing, but after three days with no response, it felt pathetic to even attempt to strike up a conversation now.

The sound of the door knob jiggling startled you before Jisoo busted into the room a moment later.

"Y/N!" She cheered in a sing-song voice. "We have another party to go to tonight!"

You already knew exactly where this party was going to be, and you felt your stomach drop at the thought of running into Mingyu.

You shook your head. "No way, Jisoo. I'm way too busy." You lied.

She pouted her lips at you. "Really? You've been working nonstop. How're you still not done?"

You shrugged and let out an exaggerated sigh.

"Well, you can take a break for a few hours. I promise I won't leave you this time. You can hangout with me and Cheol." She begged, looking at you with wide, saddened eyes.

Your phone vibrated between your hands, and when you glanced down you saw Mingyu's name on the screen.

Mingyu: I'm actually gonna be out studying and working on some stuff with a friend tonight. I promise I'll get the pics for you tomorrow :) Sent at 7:37 PM

You thought it was a little weird for a guy like Mingyu to be studying on a Saturday night, but when you realized that he wouldn't be at the party, relief flooded over you.

You looked up at Jisoo and saw her still expectantly staring at you, waiting for your response.

"I- I guess I could go for a bit."

"YES!" Seungkwan shrieked as he successfully landed another ball in one of Jisoo's cups. He turned to you and wildly smacked your palm in a high five, nearly hitting you in the face. Your stomach was starting to hurt from laughing for the past ten minutes over the intense match of beer pong in front of you.

The crowd around the table reacted loudly, some cheering and some booing as Jisoo downed another cup of alcohol. She shivered at the taste and Seungcheol came up from behind to pat her on the back. His lips moved as he said something to her, but with music blasting through the house so loud, you couldn't make out a single word.

Your phone vibrated in your back pocket. Without much thought, you pulled it out and quickly glanced at the screen.

Your heart sank into your stomach as you realized: Wonwoo was calling.

"Fuck," you muttered under your breath. You had completely forgotten that Saturday's were now reserved for your FaceTime dates.

You looked up at everyone with wide eyes, but they were too immersed in the game to notice your reaction. You pushed your way through the crowd and slipped into the bathroom before Jisoo or anyone else could come looking for you.

By the time you reached the bathroom and locked the door, the FaceTime call had already stopped ringing. Leaning against the door, you scrolled through your contacts and called back, but only as a phone call.

Wonwoo answered after two rings.

"Hey, everything alright?" He asked.

You swallowed. "Uh... yeah."

"Why didn't you FaceTime?" He continued. You hesitated, but then he spoke before you could say anything. "Why is it so loud? Where are you?"

You cursed yourself for not running away to a room that was farther away from all the music and noise outside the door. Fidgeting with your fingers, you answered: "A party."

"Oookay," he scoffed. "You could've at least let me know if you were gonna go out. But it's fine. Have fun, I guess." He responded coldly.

Your brows furrowed together instinctively. Now it was your turn to scoff at him. "You're not serious, are you?" The skin of your face grew warmer. Wonwoo was quiet. "I forgot. Sorry." You admitted through grit teeth.

"Why're you so mad?" He questioned in a defensive tone.

You rolled your eyes. "This is the first time I've ever cancelled on you and it was an accident. Do I need to remind you of all the times you ditched me?"

Wonwoo didn't respond.

"And what the fuck have you been doing the past three days that you couldn't respond to me?" You spat. Blood was rushing through your veins quickly now as anger took over.

He sighed through the receiver. "I was busy."

"Does it really take that much time to send a text to your fucking girlfriend?" Your voice began to rise. "How do you expect this to work if you don't even talk to me?"

"I'm sor-" He began to speak, but you interrupted him.

"You know, sometimes it feels like I'm dating nobody!" You cried. "Do you even realize how lonely I feel?" Your voice shook with each word as your throat grew tighter; tears welled up in your eyes. You didn't want to cry, but all the frustration you had bottled up the past couple months was finally spilling over.

In a calm voice, all Wonwoo said was: "I'm trying."

"Not hard enough." You scoffed.

"What the fuck, Y/N? Where is this coming from?" He cried. The sudden rise in his voice startled you a bit.

The phone shook in your grasp. "You act like I don't even exist! How can you call that trying?"

"Fuck, I'm not dealing with this right now. Go back to your stupid fucking party." He snapped.

"Yeah, just go and ignore me again!" You laughed sardonically.

The three tones of the call ending sounded abruptly. You looked down at your phone in shock. He had hung up on you.

Your hands balled into fists as you threw your head back against the door. Your jaw was tense, but your bottom lip still quivered.

He had done it again. It seemed it was becoming easy for him at this point—abandoning you when you needed him.

This wasn't going to last much longer if the two of you couldn't figure this out.

When you pressed your lips into a thin line, tears slipped down, staining the bags under your eyes with makeup.

Was he giving up on you?

Your head began to pound. You couldn't stand being in this hot bathroom any longer, much less this party in general. You wiped your cheeks with the back of your hand and turned to unlock the door.

As you took a step out of the bathroom, you kept your gaze locked on your feet; you didn't want anyone to notice the state you were currently in.

Not even a moment after opening the door, you collided with a tall, warm body.

"Sorry," you mumbled, pushing past.

"Y/N?" A familiar voice called. Strong hands grasped your forearm, and you glanced up at the figure.

Mingyu.

What force was bringing you back to him once again?

His lips parted in a small gasp as he noticed the redness in your tearful eyes. "Hey, what's wrong? Come here."

Before you could protest, he guided you back into the bathroom, closing and locking the door so no one could bother you two.

You kept your eyes down at the ground, unable to look at him. As he approached you, the heat of his skin radiated against you.

"I thought you were out studying." You spoke, breaking the silence.

Mingyu's hands found your jaw. He ran the smooth skin of his thumbs over your cheeks, wiping the tears that remained. "I finished early," he explained.

"Look at me," Mingyu whispered. You swallowed and blinked before meeting his eyes.

You didn't notice the thin, black-rimmed glasses that were resting on his nose before. His dark hair was pushed back, and his tan skin glowed under the bathroom light. You hated how instinctively drawn you felt to his presence.

You started to think that Kim Mingyu might be the Devil, disguised in the form of a beautiful boy that always knew the right words to say. He was here to tempt you, to swindle you at your most vulnerable moments, to test your fidelity. And you were weak enough to cave in.

"Is it your boyfriend?" He asked.

The gaze he held on you was so intense that you found yourself staring at the frames of his glasses instead of his eyes. You nodded silently in response to his question.

"Talk to me. What happened?" Mingyu cooed as he stroked your cheeks with his thumbs.

"I-" You started, but let out a sigh instead. "We just fought. I don't know. I don't wanna talk about it." You rambled.

"Okay," he nodded. "Sorry if I pushed it." He removed his hands from your face. The skin suddenly felt cold without his touch.

He sighed and shoved his hands in his pockets. "We can talk about something else."

You stood still, nodding, but couldn't think of anything to say.

"You know," Mingyu started, "You look really pretty. Even when you're crying." Your skin flushed at the compliment.

Rolling your eyes playfully, you wiped the last remnants of makeup off your cheeks. "Is that your go-to line for every girl?" You joked.

"No," he replied. "Just cause I'm in a frat doesn't mean I'm a douche."

You snickered under your breath. "Yeah, but there's gotta be so many girls that hit on you."

"There's some," he shrugged. "Doesn't mean I flirt back."

Your legs were beginning to grow tired from standing, so you walked over to the counter and sat on the edge. You gripped the ledge to keep your balance, swinging your legs back and forth.

Mingyu stood in his same spot, but turned in your direction. He quirked his eyebrows at you. "Are you suggesting that I'm attractive enough to have hundreds of girls swooning over me?" He shot you a teasing grin.

You chuckled and shook your head. "You wish."

Mingyu's jaw dropped in a fake expression of shock as he came closer to you, but he stood to the side to stare at himself in the mirror. He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

"Since when do you wear glasses?" You inquired.

"Since forever." He replied.

Mingyu placed his hands on the edge of the counter, pushing his weight onto them. The muscles in his arms were prominent through his black shirt. Your eyes dragged across his figure, eventually landing on his face again.

"I like them. They look good." You said.

He glanced at you, his eyes laced with hints of suspicion. "Thanks," he said with his voice a little uneven. He cleared his throat and stood up straight. "Did I help get your mind off him a bit?"

You winced at the mention of Wonwoo, but nodded. "Yeah, you did. Thank you." You exhaled.

Mingyu smiled to himself and his eyes met yours once again. "Good. I feel like it's the least I can do to help."

As you stared at him, you admired his features—his soft, clear complexion and plump lips. You suddenly became aware of how close he was to you; his hand was resting only a few inches away from your thigh. Your mind thought back to how it felt when those hands caressed the bare skin of your body. Impulsively, your thighs pressed together at the revisitation of the memory.

The room felt like it had instantly shot up ten degrees, and the heat left your judgement clouded like a foggy mirror. If Mingyu really was the Devil, his plan was working.

You leaned towards him until your face was only a few inches from his. Your breath caught in your throat as you went to speak.

"I really wanna kiss you right now." You admitted quickly, your eyes focused on his lips.

Mingyu backed away. "Are you drunk?" He asked. His eyes were wide with concern as he scanned you.

You remained where you were, embarrassment creeping up on you as you rapidly shook your head. "I haven't drank anything."

Mingyu chewed on his bottom lip. "I- I don't think it's a good idea. After last time..." he trailed off, glancing up to peek at your reaction. "I don't want you to do something you'll regret again."

"I don't regret it." You blurted before you could stop yourself.

You weren't sure what you were doing or where you wanted to go with this, but you couldn't stop. A feeling of lust had possessed you at this point, controlling your every word and action.

Mingyu looked taken aback at your confession, standing up straighter. His lips were parted in uncertainty, but you watched as his eyes flicked down to look at your lips.

"You don't?" He asked, inching closer to you.

Your heart was beating rapidly in your chest now. You quickly shook your head. "No."

His right hand found a place to rest under your chin, tilting your head up to look at him as his face neared yours. He swiped his thumb over your bottom lip.

"Are you sure?" He whispered.

Desire had overcome you so strongly at this point that you couldn't bring yourself to answer him through words. Instead, you crashed your lips onto his.

Mingyu responded eagerly, his kisses fueled with the same amount of force. Your hands quickly found purchase on the nape of his neck, pulling his body closer to yours. Right as you spread your legs to allow him to stand in between them, Mingyu's tongue darted against your lips, slipping into your mouth when you parted your lips for him.

He placed his left hand on your inner thigh, roughly squeezing the flesh between his fingers as he deepened the kiss. You moaned into his mouth, and he dragged his other hand down to the small of your back to pull you closer to him.

Now your core was pressed against his. Mingyu removed his lips from yours, only to place open-mouthed kisses on the area below your ear. You jerked your hips up as he nibbled lightly on the skin, the friction between your thighs growing.

Your jaw hung open as your arousal increased with each moment; your breathing became heavy while you panted into his ear. He sucked on your collarbone, and a chill shot it's way up your spine. You whimpered loudly and you could feel Mingyu smirk against your skin.

"You sound so pretty," he mumbled, his lips brushing against your skin as he spoke. He lifted his head, his tongue poking out of his cheek while he observed you. Your head was thrown back, eyes half shut, and you were ever so slightly grinding your hips against his for the smallest bit of relief.

Mingyu brought his fingers up to your lips, tapping on the soft skin to catch your attention. "Suck," he said, watching as you obediently parted your lips for him. He shoved two of his fingers into your mouth and pressed them down against your tongue. You could feel wetness building up between your legs. Even though it wasn't anything extreme, Wonwoo never did stuff like this with you in bed. You had to admit, all the new things that Mingyu was introducing to you excited you.

You hummed against him as he stuffed your mouth, almost gagging when his fingers neared the back of your throat. You swirled your tongue around his digits before he quickly pulled them away. You opened your eyes, staring at him in confusion, but his hungry gaze was already locked in on your core. He fumbled with the button of your jeans, and you felt your arousal suddenly spike at the thought of his fingers inside you.

You helped him shuffle your jeans over your ass and down to your knees. He bit his lip as he stared at your clothed heat, his cock stiffening beneath his own jeans, and pressed his dampened fingers to your clit through the fabric of your underwear.

You gasped quietly at the contact, but it wasn't enough. "Mmh, Mingyu," you whined. "Please."

"So needy," he teased with a smirk on his lips. He slipped his fingers beneath the fabric, pressing into your slick folds. His breathing grew heavier. "How're you so wet? I barely even touched you." He breathed against your cheek before he pressed a soft kiss to it. You blushed at his teasing words.

Mingyu rubbed your clit in slow circles, spreading your arousal around your folds. He pressed his lips to yours again, swallowing the moans you were letting out. He dragged his fingers down your heat, teasing your entrance by avoiding it. You clenched around nothing.

"Mingyu, I need you," you muttered against his lips.

"My fingers?" He questioned teasingly, pushing the tips of his digits into your core.

Desire was eating away at you, clouding your thoughts and replacing them with lust-filled ones. You bucked your hips up into his hand, whimpering beneath him.

"No, I want... you." You panted, looking up at him. Embarrassment picked away at you due to your vague request. His eyes appeared even darker than usual as he stared down at you with lust, registering what you were asking for.

Just as he was about to speak, the door knob shook, followed by loud pounding on the door. You jumped, and Mingyu quickly pulled his fingers away from your heat, leaving you with nothing.

"Open up!" A voice called from outside the door. "I have to piss!"

Oh, how wonderful.

You looked to Mingyu with wide eyes, and he motioned for you to stand up. "Pull your pants up!" He shouted at you in a whisper as he wiped his hands on his jeans. He stepped away from the counter, pressing his lips together in frustration as he realized the tent in his pants was painfully obvious.

You pushed yourself off the counter, standing up with shaky legs as you quickly pulled your pants over your hips and re-buttoned them.

The door knob jiggled again. "I'm literally gonna piss myself if you don't open this door in five seconds!" The same voice cried.

"What do we do?" You whispered to Mingyu.

He sighed. "Get out of here as fast as possible and go to my room." Your stomach flipped at the mention of his bedroom; you were really about to go through with this. He reached his hand out for you to grab, and you took hold of it as he led you both to the door.

Mingyu fumbled with the lock, and the door busted open a moment later, revealing a very drunken boy on the other side. He looked both of you up and down. You ducked down slightly, attempting to hide your face behind Mingyu's broad shoulders.

"Fuck, Mingyu? Really? The bathroom?" The boy said with disgust.

Mingyu rolled his eyes, his hand squeezing yours tighter. "Fuck off, Soonyoung." He replied before rushing out of the bathroom with you following close behind.

You couldn't help giggling at Mingyu's comment. He glanced over his shoulder when he noticed you laughing, a smile finding its way to his own lips as he chuckled at you. "Was I too harsh?" He joked.

Mingyu dragged you through the house quickly, and when you reached the bottom of the stairs, he pushed you in front of him to lead the way. You rushed up the steps, and when you neared the top, a sudden smack was delivered to your butt.

You let out a cry, followed by laughter of disbelief. "Mingyu!" You exclaimed with your jaw dropped once you reached the top of the stairs.

Mingyu stood behind you, his hands gripping your waist. He giggled into your ear. "I'm sorry, your ass is so cute." He placed a soft peck to your cheek.

"Let's go," he whispered, his voice suddenly an octave lower. Your stomach twisted, and Mingyu began leading you towards his room with his hands still on your hips.

He let go of you to twist the knob and push the door open, but as soon as you stepped foot into his room, his hands found your waist again and hurriedly pushed you further past the door. He kicked the door closed behind him, pushing you up against the wood. His lips quickly found yours, kissing you with even more intensity than before.

You could barely catch your breath as Mingyu gave you more rough kisses. He was being taken over by lust; he pressed himself against you, allowing you to feel the hardness in his pants. You ran one hand from his shoulder down his chest and stomach, feeling the muscles beneath his shirt tensing at your touch. Finally you palmed him through his jeans and he groaned against your mouth.

"Fuck, you're driving me crazy." He whispered before placing one more messy kiss to your lips. He pulled away to slip his fingers under the hem of your shirt, pulling it over your head quickly and tossing it to the floor. His lips found your neck again, and you moaned as his tongue darted out to lick your sensitive spot. His hands were on your ass, pulling you closer to him and squeezing the soft skin.

Your head rolled back. "Shit, Mingyu," you moaned. "I need you now."

Mingyu pulled away to look down at you with a grin on his face. "Yeah?" He raised his eyebrow. He spanked your ass lightly, causing you to whimper and lean into him. "Go to the bed." He demanded, stepping away from you.

You walked to the bed, trying to swing your hips to hide the nervous wobble in your knees. You felt Mingyu come up behind you, his body pressing against yours. His stiff cock was brushing against your thigh. You turned around, sitting on the edge of the bed as you looked up at him.

"When are you gonna take this off?" You questioned while toying with the fabric of his shirt.

He chewed on his lip as he smirked at you. Without a word, he pulled it over his head, exposing his muscular arms and toned chest. Your eyes dragged hungrily over his torso, drinking in the sight of the outline of his abs.

"Better?" He teased, interrupting your admiring of his body. You looked up at his face. His glasses still rested on his nose, but his hair was slightly disheveled and his lips were now pink and swollen from kissing yours. You were breathless. He was beautiful, and you wanted him so badly.

You perked up from the position you were sitting in, a surge of confidence driven by desire guiding you. "Lie down," you commanded. Mingyu looked taken aback for a moment as he processed your sudden dominance, but he just chuckled and laid down without protest.

Once his back was against the mattress and he was splayed out beneath you, you crawled up towards him, straddling his hips. You dragged your hands down his chest, admiring the softness and warmth of his skin while you began to grind against him.

Mingyu threw his head back as he moaned softly, and you felt yourself clench at the sound. You leaned down, pressing your chest to his as you left kisses on his neck. His hips bucked up into your center. The friction between your bodies was so intense it was driving you insane.

You felt his fingers drag across your spine, causing goosebumps to from across your skin. He fumbled with the clasp of your bra and pulled the straps down your arms. You sat up to fully pull it off and throw it somewhere in the room, and Mingyu quickly brought his hands to your breasts. He squeezed the sensitive buds, twisting your nipples between his fingers. You moaned and pressed your hips into his even harder.

"Ride me," Mingyu mumbled into your ear. Unable to form any words, you nodded, reaching for the button of his jeans.

You lifted yourself off him to help him unzip his pants, and once he started pulling them off you kneeled to the side to discard your own jeans. Just as you began pulling your underwear down your thighs, Mingyu reached for the nightstand next to his bed, shuffling around in the drawer and eventually pulling out a condom.

He pulled his cock out of his boxers, and it stood stiffly against his stomach. He quickly ripped open the package, sliding the latex over his shaft. You straddled his thighs again, about to sink yourself onto him when he quickly grabbed your hips.

"No, no." He said. "Turn around."

You looked at him in confusion. "But-"

"Just trust me," he added, pressing a soft kiss to your chest.

You turned around so your back was facing him, still straddling his thighs. He kept one hand on your waist as the other reached for his cock. He guided the stiff head through your folds, wetting his cock with your arousal. When the tip brushed against your clit you whimpered as you clenched around nothing again.

"Please, Mingyu," you whined.

He dragged the head down to your entrance, finally pushing into you. Both of his hands rested on your hips now as he slowly sunk you down onto him.

You moaned at the slight burning sensation the stretch left behind. It had already been months since a dick was last inside you, and with Mingyu's size it was even more intense.

You aided by lowering yourself onto his cock, and once he bottomed out inside you he stayed still to let you adjust. His dick twitched inside you, and you clenched around him in response.

"You're so fucking tight," he moaned into your ear. He began nibbling and sucking at the skin between your neck and shoulder from behind you, and you whined in response.

You lifted yourself off him slowly, basking in the feeling of his cock rubbing against your walls. You sunk down fully onto him before raising your hips again, finally beginning to ride him.

Mingyu allowed you to work yourself against his length while he brought one hand to your breast again. You moaned loudly as he squeezed the flesh between his fingers and bucked his hips up into you.

"Mmmh, shit, you feel so good," you babbled before crying loudly again. Mingyu quickly brought his other hand up to your throat, lightly choking you.

"Shhh, baby." He whispered against your skin. "You can't be so loud." His words were followed by another soft slap to your ass, making you whine quietly.

He let go of your throat, bringing both of his hands to your waist once again to speed up your pace. He angled his hips so he could thrust up into you at the same time, and the angle caused him to hit your sensitive spot every time. You panted loudly as the pressure in your lower stomach grew, and you ground yourself against his cock, clenching around him.

"Shit." Mingyu choked out breathlessly. "Tight little pussy's taking me so well."

Maybe it was the filthy words that left his mouth, or the way Mingyu took hold of your hips to slow your pace and thrust into you especially hard, but you felt yourself tip over the edge, your mind cloudy as pleasure overtook you. You couldn't even tell if you were crying out loudly, but you assumed so by the way Mingyu suddenly pulled himself out of you and pushed you forward until your face was pressed into the mattress and he was kneeled behind you.

He thrusted into you roughly now, trying to reach his own high. Your eyes were rolling back into your head as your core tingled with oversensitivity, and you could feel yourself drooling onto the sheets.

He came with a particularly rough grunt, pausing his movements as his cum emptied into the condom inside you. He moaned breathlessly and he slowly pumped himself in and out of you to milk his orgasm. Finally, he pulled himself completely out, and his hand ran across your spine.

"You okay?" He asked, and you lifted yourself onto your hands and knees, nodding. Mingyu looked down at your legs, his lips dropping in a slight gasp. "Your thighs are shaking." He noted out loud.

Your face burnt with embarrassment as you kneeled back onto your knees. When you finally turned to look at Mingyu, he was tossing the condom into the trash. His hair was now pressed to his forehead with sweat and his cheeks were tinted a shade of pink. When his eyes met yours, his lips quirked up into a smile.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to get rough with you." He apologized. He sheepishly scratched the back of his neck.

You shook your head. "N-no, it's okay," you croaked out, finally able to formulate words now that all the post-orgasm bliss was fading away.

You didn't know why, but you felt like you had to be near him. You crawled up towards him, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. It felt natural. Comfortable. It reminded you of how you felt with Wonwoo. And despite how much you enjoyed feeling Mingyu's soft lips against yours, that thought terrified you.

"Do you regret this?" He mumbled against your lips.

It scared you—the way you were able to betray Wonwoo so easily. Here you were, in bed with another boy: one that you shared inside jokes with and stole kisses from and ran to for comfort. All that you had built with Wonwoo over the past two years—were some miles apart really enough to tear everything down?

You answered honestly.

"No."

[btssk]

Ms. Dokkaebi - Part One

Series Summary: You are the nanny for J-Hope’s older sister Jung Ji Wo. And while you’re great with her kids, best friends with J-Hope, and considered apart of his family, you seem very rude and stand-offish when it comes to the rest of BTS. There’s a tense relationship between you and the other members but when shit hits the fan, they'll realize just how wrong they were about you. But will it be in time.?

Notes: I’m new ARMY who doesn’t know everything there is to know about BTS as individuals so I may not accurately depict them in my writings, but as a FanFic writer who’s found her new muse, i’m just jumping right into it! This was originally going to be a one shot but then I started having too many ideas and points to touch on so I’m turning it into a series. And heads up, i write longgg posts regardless. I’ll probably comb through this a few times after I post to tweak some things. Also, this is obviously written in english but imagine that they're speaking Korean. This is my first BTS fanfic,

Hope you enjoy!

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Pairing: (Platonic) J-Hope x Reader

Summary: You've come to visit your very own personal ray of sunshine Jung Hoseok while on vacation. Despite his unbridled joy at your arrival, the other members of BTS struggle to understand how such terrifying opposites could be attracted to each other.

Warning: swearing, violence

"Here, place these on the table, Canola flowers are her favorite." Hoseok wipes the remnants of soil off his hands and smiles proudly at his personal efforts. "Their train should be arriving shortly, if you still plan to meet them at the station sir." "Right, i'll leave first then. Thank you ladies." The maids bow as he gives his final nod of approval before rushing to the waiting car. "Step on it Dae-Hyun, we can't be late." "Of course sir." "Dae-Hyun," "Yes sir?" "How do I look?" The driver smiled at the multimillionaire international superstar, sweating and squirming in the backseat. "She's going to be thrilled to see you sir."

…

"Does that mean I don't look good?"

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"We're here! Everyone come welcome our special guests!" Two little kids fly into the house faster than Hoseok could finish announcing their arrival. Next came their frantic mother scrambling to collect them and scold the poor manners they were presenting.

Jin gets up from sitting in the living room with both arms open wide, inviting the kids to jump into them. "It's okay Ji Wo, i've missed my little feathers." "We're not little feathers!" "Of course you are! See, I can do this!" He starts spinning around as fast as he can. Hoseok stands besides his sister smiling at his niece and nephew flying in circles. "Too fast!" "No more Ahjussi!" Jin stops spinning, "Ah-Ahjussi? Ahjussi?! Who are you calling Ahjussi? You think i'm so old that I deserve to hear such things?! Ya! You think you'll be young forever?" Jin begins tickling and shaking the two until they're begging him to stop. "You'll be my age soon and let’s see how you like being called Ahjussi! I'm not even that old!"

Jin's signature 'eldest-rant' calls the rest of the members into the living room. "I don't know Jin, i'm starting to see some grey hairs." Jungkook joins in on Yoongi's joke, "Oh, there on the sides right?" "Mm, yeah." "Stob it!"

By the time you entered the room, everyone had already shared their hello's with Ji Wo. Her kids were outside running around with Taehyung, Jungkook, and Jimin. Jin was still fuming over being called Ahjussi despite Namjoon's best efforts to calm him down, while Yoongi stood by doing his best to turn Jin into a talking tomato.

Busy helping his sister move the luggage to the guest house, Hoseok left your welcome party in the hands of dumb and dumber, plus one. The three kept at their bickering until Namjoon finally noticed you. You dropped two large duffel bags at your feet and wore all black, head to toe. No makeup, hair in a half-assed updo, and shoes still on after entering the home? You weren’t here to impress and currently, were not impressed either.

Namjoon straightened up his appearance before nudging Jin and Yoongi to follow suit. Yoongi hid his smile and offered a very sweet and shy apology. And while Jin was obviously embarrassed to have been caught acting so childish in front of a stranger, this fact presented a dilemma. Why was there a strange woman in his living room? An American woman, with a very unpleasant look of irritation and disapproval on her face? 'Does she not see how handsome I am?' Remembering that he was in his own home and the eldest person present, he chose an informal tone. "Ya. Who are you. How’d you get in here?" No response. The only change being your eyes now solely locked onto Jin. A slight relief to Namjoon and Yoongi. "Did you hear me? Who are you, what do you want?"

"...."

"What you don't speak Korean?"

Silence.

"Aishh," Jin put his hands on his hips, "So, You American came to Korea just to step into a Korean household and not only refuse to address your senior, to state your business, or atone for these things, but can't even speak Korean to begin with? Unbelievable." After another chance to explain yourself, yet remaining silent, Jin rolls his eyes and grabs his phone. "Fine. I'm calling security." Now you looked pleased, almost amused. Did you understand what he had said? Clearly not since you were smiling, but, did you? The three members wait with you in the deafening silence.

A couple minutes and guards storm into the room scanning for the intruder. Jin immediately starts yelling and pointing for them to take you away. Yet you don't move an inch as the guards surround you. Instead, you smile sweetly in return for their low bows. The member's are stunned as the head of security addresses you and you only. "Our apologizes for this mishap Ms. Y/n, it won't happen again." You nod, accepting his notion, and Jin couldn’t take it anymore, "What! what is this?! Who is she that she can enter my home uninvited with more authority than me?!" The guard's explanation is interrupted by Hoseok's return. "Oh good, you've met y/n!" He smiles at his friends indifferent towards the scene he interrupted. "Y/n hand me your bag i'll carry it," he gives you his other arm to escort you outside, "Ji Wo and the kids are already unpacked. I'll help you with your stuff. I made sure your room had those pillows and comforter set you really liked from last time-oh! And I have a surprise for you! I went and picked them myself, your favorite! Then we can talk about what you want for dinner tonight..." The three ‘men’, who were correctly feeling as less than such, watched you step into the guest house as if you owned that too.

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"Explain."

"Oh good, I needed a second opinion! I like the yellow shirt but it's a bit much for dinner at home right? Then there's the blue but it doesn't compliment my eyes very well. Maybe the white one then? You can't go wrong-"

Jin slaps the shirts out of Hoseok's hands.

"No! Explain the woman who just walked into my home with zero etiquette, highjacked my home, security team, and is now downstairs with her bare feet on my coffee table!"

"So you're thinking the blue one."

"Hobi!"

"Jin can you keep it down, i'm trying to take my pre-dinner evening nap," Yoongi throws himself on the bed, "But to his point; Who is she?"

Hoseok picks up the blue shirt and pulls it on. "Uh, well that's a loaded question. I know that she can be very, well, i'm sure you've noticed,"

"Yes, continue."

"But, I guess, she's my best friend." Every remaining member bursts through the door, silently threatening him to say it again. Even Yoongi twisted his head, "The hell did this bitch say." Jin takes the lead scolding Hoseok's blasphemous comment, with the others suddenly becoming faithful followers of their beloved Ahjussi. Once finished fiddling with his shirt, Hoseok addressed the room full of crybabies. "Maybe 'best friend' wasn't the most appropriate label, but she IS someone very special to me. So please, all of you go get dressed and be ready to eat dinner in an hour. I need this to be perfect. It's important, please." He hurries out of the room to find you, leaving his very much so established and unquestionably best friends unsatisfied with his explanation.

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"Tell me to hurry up...look nice...feet on my table!...she's the mean one...I don't even like spicy food...Will you come help me already you see me struggling!" Namjoon was certain his hands were going to fuse with his face if he listened to this for another second. He gladly stood up to help Jin with his tie, "If it'll end your ranting about y/n-"

"Stupid name"

"You met her once for five minutes; you don't even know her." "Ah, five minutes was ten minutes too long." "That still doesn't make any sense," Namjoon grumbles for the billionth time since meeting his friend, "There, done."

"And why are we wearing ties anyways? We're at home! Ji Wo's family! I'm expected to look Grammy's ready for that…that Dokkaebi!?" Yoongi sits up from Jin's bed laughing, "That what?" "When did you get there?" "Did you just call y/n a Dokkaebi? I haven't heard name calling like that since primary school." Jin charges at Yoongi shaking his finger, "You know it! You were there, both of you! You saw her smiling at us; like a blind person winking. Just, empty." A chill runs up Jin's spine that Namjoon and Yoongi have to admit they also felt. "Hear me, that goblin will only cause us problems." "You're overreacting-"

"Her.bare.feet! On.my.coffee table!"

"Look she's special to Hobi, that means she can't actually be that bad right? And again, we only met her for five minutes-" "That was ten minutes-" "DO NOT say it again it makes NO sense! We didn't make a very good first impression either, so let's consider dinner a fresh start." Namjoon and Yoongi guide a still disgruntled Jin down to dinner. They can hear the kitchen is already crowded with conversation, children laughing, and food on the stove. Namjoon takes a deep breath, "Fresh start boys. Be nice." They round the corner to see your eyes already baring deep into their souls. Jin leans into his friend’s tiger grips on him and whispers, "See, see! Some of her goblin tricks already. Evil little mi-chin nyeon-" "You sure you want to finish that sentence." Your comment draws Hoseok’s attention to his friends, "Hey guys! Come have a beer, we're almost done cooking." The trembling mice men find a safe distance from you on the other side of the island and Hoseok hands them each a drink. But Jin’s eyes never leave yours, except to make sure that the knife in your hand is still chopping vegetables and not plunging into his chest. "So, you can speak Korean." "Of course, what kind of American would I be to come all the way to Korea, enter a Korean household, and not be able to address my senior. The honor is mine, Ahjussi." You throw in a lopsided bow at the end but Jin is far from impressed. Namjoon grabs another beer, "Here we go..." Before he has the chance, Jin's attention is on his legs. "Do the funny walk!" "Yeah, the funny walk!" "Oh, I think i'm too old, now that i'm 'Ahjussi Jin'." The twins plead with him until they're disappearing down the hallway, holding on for dear life as he flails his legs as much as possible. You finish cutting the vegetables and hand them to Ji Wo at the stove. Before you have a chance, Hoseok takes the dishes from your hands, "I can clean these too y/n, you go grab a drink and hang out while Ji Wo and I finish up. Your seat is right there next to mine!" If he could walk for you he would, even if he didn't have legs himself. Annoying and embarrassing at times, like now, but at the end of the day you loved that about him; so unashamedly sweet to you like no one else would dare to be.

You go slip into your Hoseok-assigned seat at the table next to Yoongi and count how long it’ll take him to grow a pair and say what's on his mind.

"So y/n,"

27 seconds,

"how do you know Hobi?" "I work for Ji Wo." "Oh, like a secretary?" 'The fuck?,' "Or not. Then, some security guard? No! Not that i'm saying you’re manly or anything, you're very attractive-not that i'm attracted to you-NOT that there's a reason I shouldn't be!" Yoongi chokes on his words long enough for you to respond. "I'm her nanny." You see the first unpetrified emotion cross Yoongi's face since meeting, "Really? You…like, kids?" "Of course. They're adorable." He'd have an easier time believing you if you didn't look like you were recounting the hells of war. Lost on how to continue the conversation, Yoongi tries a new approach.

He moves a tray of assorted fruit towards you, "Here. Do you like fruit? We bought all of this fresh from the local market." "I already had some." "Oh. Okay, good.. Um, I love the tangerines. I bought a whole bundle...where'd they go?” Yoongi notices that his dozen of tiny orange babies are the only fruits missing from the tray. Once again your eyes were waiting for his to catch up. "Did you-" Without breaking eye contact, possibly without breathing since Yoongi’s doubting you even have a heart right now, you peel the last tangerine. You do it slow enough that if you listened closely, you could hear it crying for 'papa Yoongi' to save it. "My...you ate...all of them." The poor boy looked like he went bankrupt with a wife and kids to feed back home. Ironic maybe? He tried his best to swallow his emotions, "That's okay. You're our guest; I'm happy to share anything with-" You pop Yoongi's last little baby into your mouth and he snaps, "That's it. Who hurt you. I demand to know." A slightly sweaty Jin joins the stand-off over his friend’s shoulder with the same scowl on his face, "See...Dokkaebi." Yoongi swears his loyalty with a single word. "Dokkaebi.."

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"Y/n i'm going to the restroom, can you-" "Got it." "Thanks!" Ji Wo runs around the corner leaving you in charge of the children. All, of the children.

Most are taking their seats, Hoseok is practically in your lap talking your ear off, and Jin is trying to shake off the two urchins still stuck to his legs. "Please!? Where is your mother it's been hours, days even!" The twins laugh at his joke and Namjoon again tries to convince Jin that he doesn't make any sense.

"No, more more!"

"Yeah more!"

"More!"

"More! MORE!"

Hoseok eventually nudges you, "Come on y/n, enough fun, the foods going to get cold." 'We never do what I want.' You snap your fingers and point to the chairs across from you. The two tumble over each other trying to see who could be the fastest. So competitive. You were proud. "Whoa, could you train Yeontan to be that obedient?" "You calling my kids dogs." There's a slight breeze behind you that could only be from Hoseok's frantic motions for Taehyung to stop talking. "I, no...nevermind."

Ji Wo comes back and sits next to her son, "Okay, let's eat!" Everyone starts to fill their plates and converse amongst themselves. Hoseok is making your plate while you're busy making the kids'. Sitting on the other side of the twins is Jungkook. He gives himself a pep-talk until he's confident that he's about to do the right thing. Yet, across from him, Yoongi and Namjoon shoot him every desperate facial expression that they know. Whatever Jungkook is about to do, they're sure it's a bad idea. 'What are they mouthing? "Dok...Dokkaebi?" What? That doesn't make any sense.' He gives them a curt 'I got this' smile so the two give up.

'Poor bastard.'

'It's always the innocent.'

Jungkook grabs the bowl in front of him and holds it out towards you. "Y/n, I made this dish specially for you. It takes a few hours to prep and another two for cooking, but Hoseok spoke so fondly of you I knew it was worth the time." You feel the pride radiating from Hoseok when he places his hand over yours. The whole thing's silly, but you let your little sunshine have his moment. "The sauce is my grandmother's secret recipe and I made the noodles from scratch. It's always a crowd favorite when I make it. I'd love it if you had some! Let me put some on your plate." "No thanks." Jungkook stops mid-reach across the table and his doe-eyed smile falters. "I, uh, promise you'll love it. It's the best dish on the table! Please, just try it-" "You trying to kill me (?) I said no" "But-" "And I won't say it again."

A pained silence falls over the group, but nothing compares to the hurt on Jungkook's face. Defeated and humiliated, he slides back down into his chair too embarrassed to lift his head. Then, "I want some!" the little girl next to him slaps a smile back on his face. "Of course sweetie, here!" This time Hoseok and Ji Wo are the ones quick to speak up in a panic. "No hun, you can't." "Jungkook don't-"

*CLINK!*

Your eyes snap to the spoon still spilling pasta on the plate. The sound rings out and fades away without a single interference. Jungkook's frozen in fear, everyone is, as they should be. You can feel Hoseok desperately squeezing your hand, silently begging you not to cut off his friends'. Ji Wo's face is pleading the same case. You listen to Jungkook's heart beat out of his chest for a few more seconds, watch his life flash before his eyes to truly remember this moment by. Removing your hand from Hoseok's, then placing it over his, is reassurance that he and Ji Wo can stop shaking. As for everyone else, they're nothing more than deer caught in headlights. "There's shrimp in that. She, and I, are both allergic to shellfish. If you feed her that, she'll die in minutes, and then you would die in seconds. Am.I.clear." There was another silence while Jungkook struggled to keep his soul from leaving his body. He couldn't believe what he had almost done and begged forgiveness from Ji Wo, "I-I'm so sorry! I had no idea, honest I wouldn't have-" "It's okay Kook, I know that you didn't know. It was an accident," her eyes drift towards you, "right y/n."

She's weary. She can tell that you haven't calmed down, not enough at least. You take your job very seriously; you love her kids as if they were your own. And if you ever did have kids of your own, then god save us all. You really were like a second parent to the twins. The kids once asked if the two of you were going to get married some day. You and Ji Wo were both laughing your asses off until you realized that Eun had fallen out of her chair. Her face was turning purple and her throat had nearly swollen shut. She laid motionless on the floor with her eyes digging into y/n's, begging for help. But no one saw what happened and didn't know what to do. Y/n took a gamble since it was their first time having lobster and gave her her epi-pen. As relieved as Ji Wo was to hear her daughter start breathing again, it would be a few weeks for her, and you, to completely move past what happened. That was the first and only time Ji Wo had seen you so unnerved; truly afraid. And right now she saw that same memory flash over your eyes in a blinding loop. She tries again, "Y/n, it was an accident…It's okay now."

"Y/n," Hoseok's gripping your fist with both of his hands, "She didn't eat any, she's okay. Jungkook knows now, they all do. Right." Every head at the table shook furiously, but you saw none of it. Your eyes locked onto Jungkook and debated which fingers to break first.

Then you felt Hoseok's grip on you change. It loosened, and his fingers gently ran over the back of your hand, something that always forced you to relax. "Angel," One of your biggest weaknesses, "please, for me." was hearing him beg. 'And that dang pet name.' You let out all of your pent-up energy into one labored sigh, finally releasing the dinner guests as hostages. Yoongi jumps from his chair as you abruptly stand. "What did you learn Jungkook." "She's-you both!-are allergic to shellfish," poor thing had been on the brink of crying this entire time, "I swear that I will never forget it-" "No. You don't question me. Ever again."

While you're turned to grab a clean plate for Eun, "Chin-hae don't stand on your chair-!" you hear the sweetest voice back you up. "Yeah! You don't ask y/n questions!" He's all but using his sister's head as a prop while sticking his sticky finger in Jungkook's face, “giving him the business” about not asking anymore questions or trying to kill his sister again. You motion for him to sit down once you're back and shoot a wink. 'That's my boy.'

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"Again, Ji Wo, I am so sorry for earlier at dinner. I still feel absolutely awful about it."

"It's okay Jungkook, honestly. Y/n always carries an epi-pen for both of them. Even if Eun had eaten some, she would've been okay."

"So then, that whole "she'll die in minutes, you'll die in seconds" thing was y/n just messing with me, right?"

"Of course, no chance she'd let Eun get even close to dying."

Jungkook relaxes just enough sipping his coffee to choke on it when Ji Wo continued, “But she might still kill you, that wasn't a joke." Jimin smacks his friend's back until he settles.

After dinner, you took the twins to the guest house to get ready for bed. Everyone else stayed behind and congregated towards the living room to properly catch up with Ji Wo. Before getting married, the boys saw her around all the time. Since then, they only see her on the rarest occasions. It sucks, but that's the way it has to be.

"Anyways, thank you all for letting us stay here. I know it's not everyday you guys get the chance to go on vacation."

All of you were staying at BTS's vacation home out on Daecheong Island. Technically it was Jin's vacation home, but since he always said yes when the member's wanted to use it, no one bothered listening to his empty protests anymore.

The island is located in northern South Korea; just west of Seoul. The home was well secluded, on the coastline with plenty of space and privacy, about an hour or so from the nearest town. It was a favorite place for the boys to get away since they had true privacy while there, but could still feel like they were at home. And rarely if ever would they draw attention while in town. The locals knew who they were but lived their own lives on the island and didn't care to bother them.

Namjoon pats Ji Wo's back, "Don't worry about it. We're happy to have you." "Yeah. No filming, practices, recording schedules," Jin stretches back in his chair, "no responsibilities what so ever. Plus now, you and the little ones are here? Talk about a good time." He turns towards Ji Wo though, momentarily becoming serious, "And no one knows where we are. Promise." The rest of the group offers reassurance to Ji Wo.

Hoseok leans in close to his sister, "You didn't tell anyone where you were going right? Didn't have any issues?" She shakes her head no. Anyone else would think that the boys were worried about people finding out where they were. But Ji Wo knew the truth. They wanted to make sure no one knew where she was. Especially her children.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Flashback

You remembered the first and only time that you had met Ji Wo's ex-husband. It was the twins' third birthday party and the first of many without their father. Ji Wo pulled out all the stops to try and make it as special as possible. There ended up being just enough commotion for him to sneak in through the side gate.

You'd heard plenty about how he lost custody of the twins due to his alcoholism, and how more than once it led him to put his hands on the them. Not to mention the few screws he had loose in the head. He'd never do anything less than swear he loved his children more than anything and just wanted to be a family. But after putting Ji Wo and the twins in the hospital, twice, he didn't stand a chance in court. At the final hearing he reeked of alcohol and rambled on about making Ji Wo pay for stealing his children from him. He was detained for disorderly conduct and Ji Wo won sole custody.

There wasn't a word from him after that so no one expected him to show up that day.

You didn't know what he looked like, but the new stench of alcohol in the air and screams from Chin-hae was more than enough information. "Oh come on son, I brought you a present...I think?" The drunk stumbled around trying to feel for the nonexistent gift. Every child ran to their parents as you ushered them all inside the house. Ji Wo didn't have security then, and this was the moment to change that.

Chin-hae and Eun clung to Ji Wo's legs, remembering enough of their father to be afraid. "Seo-Jun. What are you doing here." He acted genuinely offended by her comment, "Is it not my children's birthdays? Their father should be here." He staggered closer and Ji Wo struggled not to shake more than she already was. "N-No. You, should leave. The restraining order-" "TO HELL WITH THAT PIECE OF PAPER!" His outburst even made you jump. You needed to hurry and make sure everyone was safe inside before going to help Ji Wo. Only a few more people and then you would be free to kick his pasty ass.

"Seo-Jun please, you're drunk; you're scaring the kids." "Oh, well then," his posture straightens and eyes go dark, "i'm suddenly feeling very sober. No need to be scared now. Come on kids, give your dear old dad a big hug." Only a sour breath away from them and both kids were soaked in their tears. They cried "Mom no! Don't make us!" "We'll be good! PLEASE!!" "MOM!?" Ji Wo clung onto them as hard as she could without hurting them. She took two steps back for every one Seo-Jun made. "Come on guys, you're not being very nice. You can't still be mad about last time right? I said sorry. And hey! I have some new friends for you to meet." Three men entered the backyard with eyes glued to the kids. "Seo-Jun please! Don't do this!?" "Ji Wo. Honey, you know I won't ask again," he holds out his arms, "Hand them over." When the men start advancing Ji Wo drops down to her knees to shield her children as best she could. But she was crying just as hard as they were, just as terrified.

One man had his hand on Eun's flailing leg for less than a second before being drop kicked by you running at full speed. He didn't get up until the ambulance arrived. Without hesitating you go after the next one, throwing hit after hit until he falls and doesn't get up. The third pulls out a knife and you see red. Knives, real knives like these, sent you into an unstoppable rage. You had plenty of reasons to hate them, and even more to hate Seo-Jun. The man took a few swipes at you before taking a misstep and gives you the opening you need. A single move and you get ahold of the knife, toss it, and start breaking as many of his bones as possible. This wasn't just about stopping a kidnapping anymore, it was making sure they suffered as much as time allowed you.

This would be the first time Ji Wo and the kids see you fight; see you turn into a monster, "Y/n?" and Hoseok. The look on your face must have terrified him because he stumbles back before being able to focus on the situation. Hoseok runs to help Ji Wo, taking Chin-hae so the four can make a faster break for the house.

Seeing his plan go to shit, Seo-Jun makes a last ditch effort to grab at least one of the kids. He takes after Ji Wo and Eun but luckily he's a lot slower than you are. You drop the near lifeless body you'd been breaking and sprint after him. He sees you coming and his desperation overtakes logic. Seo-Jun reaches into his jacket, "You're not taking them away again bitch! Let's see how you like it!!"

*CLICK*

"Y/N!!"

*BANG!*

A silent cry forces its way out. You're hands radiating fire from the new hole in the side of it. Your panicked reflex led to sloppy technique in redirecting the barrel of the gun from Eun. you can't let it slow you down. A left hook and solid kick to the side of his knee and Seo-Jun crumbles. Working through the pain, you knock the gun out of his hand and jump on top of him, hitting him with everything you've got; every punch you know with all the strength you have left. You couldn't feel anything from your right hand up to your elbow, 'guess I'll just have to keep going until it comes back.'

-

You don't know how long it's been, could be minutes maybe only seconds, but Seo-Jun had stopped moving. You know that you should probably quit now, but hearing Eun scream for you a moment ago was far too close to home. You knew that sound; you're brother made that sound. And the more you remembered it, the more it seemed this high you were on would never end. You didn't want it to. You hated Seo-Jun for everything he's done and for everything he reminded you of. The life you fought through Hell to escape from. If he lived through this, you swore you'd finish him off for good one day.

Your ears were still ringing from the gunshot but a voice fought it's way through. "y/n...Y/N! You have to stop! It's okay now! You need to calm down! Please!" If Hoseok would be honest with himself, he was too afraid of you to do more than scream from a safe distance, let alone try and touch you. The way you weren't letting up on Seo-Jun's body even for a moment. He looked over at the man you had been beating up when he arrived. His body was crumpled and folded over like a distorted carcass. It was inhumane; indigestible. He knew parts of your past but seeing it manifest in front of him? he didn't imagine being this afraid of you. Would you ever hurt him? How thin was this line you toed? Did he know you at all- "AHH-!"

*BANG!*

Hoseok doesn't move when blood splatters across his face. He can't even will his tears the courage to fall. He had been too lost in thought to realize the second man you attacked had gotten up. How he had only been step or two away from him, gripping his partners knife. He didn't notice how swiftly you turned and shot him with Seo-Jun's gun. Square between the eyes without blinking your own. You killed a man without hesitation, totally relaxed with zero remorse.

The only thing strong enough to pull you out of your rampage was someone you loved being in harms way. No amount of rage could trump the urge to protect them, and only once they were safe would you feel yourself come back to earth. You stood up, back in reality, but Hoseok was still lost in the clouds. Only a few moments ago he was debating the origins of your soul, now he knew you were his guardian angel. If not for you he would be a pile of sliced meat right now, or Ji Wo, or even the twins. They could have been taken like Seo-Jun wanted or worse, also like Seo-Jun wanted. Ji Wo was helpless to stop it and he arrived too late regardless. You knew all of this already, that's why you fought for them. With all of your heart you protected Hoseok's family; his whole world, and now him too. He'd never be able to repay you.

"D.I.P.D.! Drop the gun! Hands up both of you!"

"Backyard is secure."

"Roger that. Civilians are all accounted for and inside of the home is secure."

"We've got four bodies; call for another ambulance." "Yes sir."

"Check for pulses and take those two into custody already!" "Sir!"

The next month was nothing but back to back court hearings, being shuffled to and from your holding cell, and meeting with lawyers before and afterwards. Everyone who was at the birthday party had to testify in court, then they were free to go. But almost every one stayed throughout the entire trial. Your motives weren't lost on them; they knew what a monster Seo-Jun was and it was obvious what he was there to do. Each testimony painted you as the selfless hero who saved the day. Mounted against Seo-Jun was a multitude of eye witness testimonies, means and motive, forensic evidence, the crime scene report, and the irrefutable security camera footage. Seo-Jun's remaining accomplices got 18 months by accepting a plea deal while Seo-Jun himself received 3 years, eligible for early release after 2 on good behavior.

Normally with the amount of evidence against Seo-Jun, this case would have been open and shut in a matter of days. But in private you were being psychologically evaluated and cross examined by both teams and the judge personally, to determine your own fate. Your personal file, although sealed from the public and PI Investigations, had to be taken into consideration. In the end you were cleared of all charges and free to go. If anyone asked, the delay in your release was due to some "administrative issue with the paperwork or whatever" and so you spent that time just sitting in your cell counting sheep.

During your release, "We know who Seo-Jun is y/n. Be careful," the judge leans in close as you walk past her and whispers, "stay close to those kids." That decided your fate, whatever that may come to be. This wasn't over; Seo-Jun would be back, so not a day would go by that you weren't by their sides.

You were prepared for the worst when you saw the Jung's again. You thought they'd call you a monster and tell you to stay away. But tears poured from your eyes when Chin-hae and Eun crashed into your legs and refused to let you leave them again. Ji Wo's hug surprised you most, you two had never hugged before. She immediately hired you as the kids' personal bodyguard but if anyone asked you were their nanny. (A secondary role you fell into). She moved you into one of the spare bedrooms of her new undisclosed address and location home, just down the hall from the kids' rooms. She told you to do what you want with the room; paint it, rearrange it, knock out a wall, you name it. Then gave you a personal black card to use how you like. You told her it was all too much, trying to remain humble and modest, but it just made her cry. She couldn’t comprehend how else she could repay you for what you did for her and the kids, not that she felt this even amounted to enough.

Next you hand picked her new security detail. Each candidate had to fight you in hand-to-hand combat as the final test, and whoever didn't go down in 30 seconds made the cut. One of them managed to land a hit and became head of security, also your fill in whenever you weren't around.

Hoseok hadn't come around the first few days after your release. 'Why would he, he saw what I can really do. What i'm really like.' Ji Wo would tell you not to worry or think too much, that he probably just needed a bit more time to process some things.

You woke up on morning and were instantly suspicious, "What?" Ji Wo just kept smiling ang giggling to herself on the couch, "Oh, nothing. Just a funny book." "You're not reading a book-" "Oh the door! I wonder who that could be." You turn to the guard stationed in the main hallway, "She hasn't been drinking has she?" "No ma'am."

Ji Wo prances back into the room, "It's for you!" then off into the kitchen. "Ji Wo I know you're pretending; you haven't cleaned a single dish in 6 years." "Just go to the door?!" You shuffle down the hall, "I hope your mystery guest doesn't mind me looking like hell!"

"They don't,"

you stop.

"They think you always look pretty great actually."

"Hoseok..."

He stood at the door holding your favorite flowers and dressed to the nines, "What is this, what are you doing?" He stepped through the threshold, "Can I come in? I don't want to end up like the last guy who didn't ask you." His joke was stupid and inappropriate but he laughed like a goofball all the same. You tried to smile but couldn't stop the frown from forming. You look down at your feet suddenly feeling ashamed and embarrassed in front of Hoseok. He closes the door and puts down the flowers. He holds your hands in his, "What's wrong?" "Nothing I," 'I was afraid you hated me,' "I just missed you. You haven't been around since..." The words were stuck in your throat and you were at a loss at how to get them out. "I thought..." He understood, "Hey no, no. I'll admit I did need some time to process what happened but, I could never..." 'I'm not afraid of you,' He cupped your face and lifted it to make sure you heard this next part, "I owe you my life y/n. You saved all of us, and that's not something that a bad person would do. I could never be afraid of you; I love you." You wiped a stray tear and playfully punched Hoseok in the shoulder, "Hobi don't," "What? I don't mean like that!" You both laughed. It was a relief to feel like things were back to normal between the two of you.

"You know what I mean." "Yeah I do. I love you too Hoseok. Now seriously, what is all of this; what's with the get up?" "Oh, well I was worried that you might be feeling a little down so I wanted to treat you to a day out! Starting with breakfast at that fancy restaurant you like." "The one with the giant fish tank? And we get to pick out which fish we want to eat?!" "Yes now hurry up and go get dressed, our reservation's in 45 minutes." Your sprint towards your room looked the exact same as the twins. Passing the kitchen you hear Ji Wo, "He's feeding you isn't he." "YUP! My favorite!" “Bring me back some-" "Absolutely not!"

20 minutes later and you're speeding back down the stairs dressed and ready to go. "There's no need to pull me out the door like this! We have a reservation; we won't have to wait to eat-"

"But all the good fish could already be gone! I want one so fat and juicy it has rolls!"

"Fish don't have rolls-y/n you're drooling on my sleeve-Ew it's on my hand! Let go already!"

You shove his body into the car and jump in after him, "Let's go Dae-Hyun! Get us there in 10 minutes and i'll get you whatever you want to eat." "Deal."

"Don't you mean i'll get him-?"

"Not now Hoseok I have to focus. Momma's going fishing."

Hoseok rolls his eyes at your theatrical evil grin, "For someone with a shellfish allergy you're too excited to eat fish."

"What can I say, I go wherever the spirits lead me."

"You're not spiritual."

"I am when they lead me to fish."

End of Flashback

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Good night honey. Sweet dreams." You had already finished tucking Chin-hae into bed and now it was his sisters turn. "Sweet dreams y/n. You'll be here when I wake up right?" "Always." You kiss her forehead and turn off the lights when you leave. You went down the hall to your room to change into something more comfortable before heading back out to the main house. Security had already been stationed around the guest house, so you felt okay leaving the twins here alone for a while. On your way out, you passed by the kid's room once more, 'Eun must have been really tired. How has her snoring never woken up Chin-hae before.’

You smile thinking about those rascals on your walk back to the main house.

Jung Chin-hae and Jung Eun.

Your favorite people in the whole world. A fact that hurt Hoseok's feelings even though he felt the same way. He never knew if because of his lifestyle, he would ever actually find true love, get married, and have children of his own. So his niece and nephew were the closest that he was going to get, and he loved them with all of his heart.

Ji Wo chose Chin-hae's name because it means 'depth of the ocean.' Going to the beach and being on the water was something that she craved constantly while she was pregnant with them. It was her escape and sense of peace while she faced struggles in her personal life. She had recurring dreams about sailing off with her children, away from their problems, and starting new lives as mermaids living happily in the sea. When they were born Chin-hae came out first, technically making him older, and it's how he acted. He was a textbook caring and protective big brother to his sister. His emotions could sometimes get the better of him (as demonstrated at dinner) but he had the biggest heart and was so thoughtful. Especially when it came to Eun.

Eun's name was chosen without a second thought. As soon as she opened her eyes, she looked up at Ji Wo with shining silver eyes. As beautiful as they were, there was concern. The doctors did some tests and found out that Eun was colorblind. They explained, in laymen's terms, that the parts of the eye that perceived color hadn't developed and therefor lacked pigment. That's why her eyes looked silver, and how Ji Wo chose her name.

When the two got older, Ji Wo tried explaining that Eun was colorblind, but Chin-hae didn't understand and thought that she meant Eun was completely blind. This misunderstanding created many memories that you'll never forget. You laugh to yourself thinking about one of your favorites. Chin-hae was constantly by his sister's side since learning that she was 'blind'. He was always holding her hand, trying to do everything for her, even tried brushing her teeth every now and then. One time you had called them to dinner but heard the two yelling at each other in the other room.

"Careful Eun! You have hold my hand, there's a step, you'll fall!"

"No I won't! I do it myself!"

"You can't! You're blind!"

"Nu uh! I see you!"

"No! You not see anything!"

Eun gasped, "I not see you?"

"No!"

She immediately started bawling her eyes out, "No oppa, I not see you!"

Chin-hae did his best to comfort her and grabbed her hand, "Hush Eun, it's okay. You always just hold me, like this."

He walked her over to the table and sat like nothing had happened but you couldn't wait to relay it all to Ji Wo. It was the sweetest thing watching him make her plate and then try to feed her. Ji Wo had to explain things a few more times before they finally understood what she meant. Even so, he still describes every color that he sees to her whenever she asks. You often daydream that that's how things could have been with you and your brother.

You let the bitter-sweet memory fade away when you enter the living room and take a seat next to Hoseok. ‘Of course he was saving me a seat next to him.’ He nuzzles himself into your side and carries on talking about the upcoming festival on the island. No one listens to a word he says because how could they? Did he just willingly throw himself into the lions den? What were you going to do they thought,

‘is she going to gouge out his eyes?’

‘Stab him for invading her space?’

‘Pull out his hair?’

‘Use his bones to make her bread-? Oh wait no that’s Shrek.’

Your only reaction though is to put your arm around him and listen to his rambling about this festival. You never bored of your ray of sunshine. You could always count on him to lift you up or calm you down. Of everyone you knew, no one was able to explain how the two of you could be so close. With seemingly nothing in common, you were total opposites and not in a cute Christmas romcom type of way. But maybe that was why you loved him so much.

The expectation is that the people who’d like you would look just as scary, be just as off putting, just as much a monster as you knew you really were. Yet it was someone like Hoseok to welcome you into his life. He saw the sliver of a good heart that you still had and spoke life into it.

“You’ll never leave us again.”

“We owe you our lives.”

“You’re not a bad person.”

“I love you y/n.”

Even though you weren’t into holding hands, snuggling on the couch, or going to whatever festival Hoseok was talking about, you’d do it for him. For all of them. So you let him snuggle into your side while you run your fingers through his hair like he liked, and Hoseok plays with your free hand. “-that sound good to you y/n?”

‘God knows what he’s talking about’

“Yeah sounds good Hobi.”

[fayeimara]

Meant To Be Series || One For Every Billion

6. By My Side | Pt 1

- July 20th -

The park is as close to empty as it can be when your group arrives early in the morning. Since you've been staying with the Kageyamas, you drive up with Miwa and Tobio, meeting up with your mutual cousins, Ren and Shin, at the entrance to the park's hotel.

You've all made sure to capitalize on early access passes and are staying overnight to make the most of your time, so everyone drops off their things first before deciding what to do in the time you all have before the park opens to all regular pass holders.

The rest of you are just waiting on Miwa to meet you all back in the lobby from her room (she takes the longest, honestly) and you're pulling on the thigh-length sleeveless cardigan you grabbed to wear over your shorts and tank combo, when you finally hear her voice as she crosses from the elevator bay to your group by the doors.

"Okay kiddos, I'm off to the adults only section of this place so call me if you need anything. But try not to, you know?"

Well, Miwa is the eldest of the group here and you're sure she only came along because her best friend decided they could make a mini girls' vacation out of it and brought along her own younger siblings as an excuse.

Tobio looks a little frustrated when he replies, "Neesan, it's way to early in the morning to find a bar."

"Are you kidding me? Of course I'm not drinking. Yet. We're just going to the theme spa!" She happily exclaims, waving her hand in the air delicately, "So you know, try not to get lost or get hurt, because I don't want you interrupting some serious r and r."

Ren rolls his eyes at his cousins' interaction, as if he's any better. You're well aware he also already has plans to ditch the rest of your group when his friends arrive. Thankfully Shin interrupts before Tobio's easy temper is tripped.

"Hey let's hit up the new coaster! I want to see Tobi throw up!"

Okay, not helping. But you do want to try the new roller coaster, as well, you're a huge fan of any adrenaline inducing activities and there are only so many times you can try the ones back home before you're used to all the dips and twists. This new one is supposed to have the highest drop record internationally so far.

"Tobio you won't throw up, right?" You try to coax him to agreeing, "I think you'll enjoy it!"

He gives you a dry look as if to say, You didn't put any effort into that. So you shrug and decide to bribe him, "I'll buy you milk after."

He contemplates it for a moment before nodding. Success, as usual.

Miwa claps her hands together in excitement, "Perfect! Okay, so I've given Y/n the contacts for Eiko's sister and brothers. They're around here somewhere so please take some time to say hi. Tobio already knows Hikaru and Hiroshi so I'm sure you'll all get along great!"

Before any of you have time to respond, she's bounced off, presumptively towards the waterpark and spa area. Okay then, you turn back to your cousins with a big smile that only Shin returns, making him your favourite of the day. You're all for the deadpan look when you're bored or annoyed but you're actually so happy to be here, you love amusement parks.

"So... let's hit some coasters?"

"Yeah!" Surely, you can all guess who answers.

After spending about an hour hitting up several of the most popular rides and possibly traumatizing Tobio before the main rush of people arrive in the park, you get a buzz from your phone, sitting tight against your waist in an inner zippered pocket of your cardigan, with your cash and cards. It's really a pain to have to carry bags and even more so to have to stress about having it stolen so, being an avid coaster enthusiast, you like to keep your items simple on days like this.

Quickly moving out and to the side of the exit line to pull out your phone, you see a notification from Hana, the girl who is Miwa's friend's little sister.

, You look up and find your cousins also stopped when you @sakusasimpbot anding right by you. Thank god, you didn't want to have to drag them back here if they'd wandered away to the next ride.

"Hana and her brothers are on this ride so I told her we'd wait for them here."

Ren is typing on his phone but speaks up, "I'm about to head out to meet up with my friends." Finally finished with his own chat, he looks up at the rest of you, "Will you guys be okay from here? We can meet back for lunch."

Tobio just shrugs while you nod, Shin speaking for everyone when he tells his brother, "Yeah, yeah. Just go already, the 'real' adult already ditched us a while back so no need to act all mature here."

"Shut up, Shin." Ren returns his brother's smirk with a glare, which slides back into his expressionless gaze after he rolls his eyes and faces you and Tobio.

"We'll be fine, Ren, we're all in the same place and can call if anything." Your turn to reassure him where Shin clearly failed to even try.

Ren studies you for a moment before turning and throwing a casual, "..'kay." over his shoulder. You're sure you, Tobio, and Shin all share a mutual eye roll at that.

Shin has pulled up the park map on his phone, looking for a place where your group might want to grab a snack or drink, when the next line of people exit the ride.

Linking your arm with Tobio, you scan for a girl and two guys that look around your age. It's not hard because there really still aren't many people in this area of the park yet and the guys in question make an immediate beeline for the three of you when they lock eyes with Tobio. Right, since they know him already.

Hana is a pretty brunette with a bright smile on her face and you can immediately tell she's a fellow coaster enthusiast, if not adrenaline junkie, because of that wild happy look in her eyes.

Just as their group reaches yours, you smile back at her and say, "It's a really good one, right?"

"Yes!" She happily exclaims, "I felt like I was flying off the seat!"

You laugh at her enthusiasm, "Exactly, completely weightless."

Tobio introduces you and Shin to Hiroshi and Hikaru, who immediately tell you both to just call them Hiro and Karu. The two brothers have a relaxed vibe to them as well and, you swear, Karu and Shin click instantly. Not surprising, since they have a very similar outgoing and playful vibe, although you can attest from personal experience that Shin is probably the more mischievous and troublesome one. Karu has more of a happy and fun feel, if you're reading him correctly.

Hiro is equally nice and outgoing, with a slightly more chill personality that offsets Tobio's quiet intensity pretty well.

Hana is amazing and your first impression of her is only improved as you all sit down and talk over refreshing drinks at an outdoor café. She reminds you a lot of one of your friends back home, Aspen, in that down to earth and cheery kind of way so you immediately feel a sense of familiarity with her.

You find out that the siblings are each about a year apart, which coincidentally lines them up with Shin, you, and Tobio respectively. You had a feeling Miwa and her friend were pushing all of you to hang out here together for a reason. You definitely think she wanted her brother to spend time with a friend, especially after how tough things had been for him at school and with his club lately.

You look over at him when Hana briefly interjects into his and Hiro's conversation, completely relaxed for now with a bottle of cold milk in his hands. Yeah. He catches you looking and blinks in surprising, honestly shocking you when he returns your smile to him with a very small one of his own. You haven't seen him smile for quite a while, at least not the past several weeks you've been staying with his family. Probably not since the last time you saw him about a year and a half ago.

Oh, Tobio, you think as you look away to study the people passing by, I hope you're okay. He was always serious and direct, even as a little kid, but he never hesitated to smile when he felt happy. Does that mean he hasn't felt happy lately? For how long?

You have to shelf your concern away so you don't dampen the mood of this trip for everyone. Looking back to the others to make sure they're all finished up, you ask, "What do we want to do next?"

"None of us have tried these ones across the park," Shin speaks up, "So maybe make a circle this way back around?"

You catch Hana's disappointed expression just before she wipes it away and says, "I was hoping to try the new one, it's supposed to be exhilarating!"

"They already went on it, Hana." Karu gently replies but you shake your head and say, "Sure, but I loved it. I'd be really happy to go again!"

"Really?"

"Yeah! Why don't we split up? If the guys actually start from the other side of the circuit they planned, we should catch up to them in no time and group back up."

Karu and Hiro exchange looks and shrug, Karu stating, "I'm okay with that if you guys stick together and message us updates so we know you're safe and also don't miss each other as the park fills up more." He looks to your cousins and asks, "What about you guys? What do you think?"

Tobio's still looking at where you pointed out your plan of action on the map displayed from Shin's phone but it's really Shin who you have to make sure agrees. After all, Tobio is younger than you by a year, but Shin is older than you by that same length. Even though it's never something you think any of you typically consider, you remember the little incident last summer where he got chewed out by Ren and hope he's not decided to be a little more strict with you.

You catch him looking at you with a sardonic gleam in his eye and realize both your thoughts are probably very aligned. If he does decide to veto your idea, it won't be because he believes he needs to be strict, it'll be purely out of his innate need to torment you. Ugh.

"Okay," What? Ahh, now you're even more suspicious but it sounds like he's accepting your plan, "keep the sound on your phone high though, and call immediately if there's an emergency."

Yeah, sure, at this point you have a line of people who've told you to call them right away but if he hasn't considered that, you're not saying it.

So instead, you brightly agree, "Of course!" earning a doubtful look from him.

Oh well. You reach for Hana but she's already grabbing your hand instead and you both rush away to the new ride calling over your shoulder, "See you later!"

You both ignore whatever they call out after the two of you, giggling and debating where you want to sit on the ride instead.

"Y/n!" You hear a familiar voice call out your name in excitement just as you both reach the line up for the first ride and you feel butterflies take flight in your stomach, spreading electric tingles through you with the flutter of their delicate wings. Wow. Well, you know even before you turn around who it's going to be.

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Masterlist

Behind The Scenes!

-Y/n and Toru can really dance around the things they really want to talk about, even when some things are called out directly by both...

-Y/n doesn't always catch herself calling him 'Toru' out loud (or over text even), clearly that's what she calls him in her head <3 but she usually is aware of what name she's using when she speaks it out loud, or she just avoids calling him directly at all

-But much like when she says 'I'm sorry Toru' in that 4th panel, it happens... she didn't realize it, it was just a heartfelt apology that she was trying to genuinely express

-She won't say she wasn't expecting him to ask to spend his birthday with her, even if they've messaged constantly for the past year

-Which is why she felt so bad when he reached out about it early in the month... and why she wasn't focused on how she addressed him... but then calls him Oikawa in the next panel

-He notices all the slips, whether he teases comments or not

-Tobio and roller coasters... :'D

A/N: Hmm, I wonder who this new person could be... lmao, hope you guys have liked part one so far, the ride only gets wilder from here ;)

Taglist: @delusivist, @prettyinblack231, @kac-chowsballs, @sakusasimpbot, @hawkthekinnie

[spencers-dria]

Trauma

Someone To Stay Ch. 9

Spencer x fem reader

It's been several weeks since Y/N and I started our weekly movie nights. After starting Harry Potter we decided that we would keep watching our way through the series until we finished them. Last week I was out of town on all of her days off, but tonight we get to watch our favorite together, Prisoner of Azkaban. Seeing as we both love Halloween, this doesn't come as much of a surprise.

Last time I had asked to borrow her Harry Potter cookbook. As a surprise I've been cooking pumpkin pasties. I normally don't do much cooking, but this was well worth it. Movie night has become incredibly casual, so i slip into some purple pajama pants and a black t shirt before driving to her apartment. We decided movie nights would all take place at her apartment, seeing as she had the nice TV with a decent sound system. I had previously spent almost all my time reading, so all I had was my mom's old TV tucked away in the corner, only used when I felt the need to binge Dr. Who.

It's not long before i'm knocking at her door, warm snacks ready to go. She opens the door and looks down with a huge grin.

"Are those what I think they are?"

I nod, glad to see she's excited about them. After a moment I notice a pleasant smell wafting from the kitchen.

"You made something too?" I peek my head into the kitchen hoping to discover the source of the scent.

Y/N pulls out two mugs topped with foam, smiling like a giddy little kid. We both take a sip, and I feel the warmth filling me up as I take in the drink that tastes like Autumn in a cup. I've never had butter-beer before, but this is perfect. I look up to see whipped cream coating Y/N's upper lip, and based on the laugh she's holding back, I would guess I am sporting the same foam mustache. We both bust out in laughter. Something about spending time with Y/N makes me feel like a kid again. I know I can share my knowledge with her and she actually encourages me to do it quite often. But she also makes me feel like I can be goofy and silly and just have fun. I had almost forgotten what that feels like.

After we each curl up on our end of the couch with blankets and pillows, I can't help but realize how happy I have been having her as a friend in my life. Something about this realization pulls my mind in the opposite direction, and I suddenly find myself remembering why happiness feels like such a long forgotten stranger...Maeve. The name had not crossed my thoughts in weeks. This realization leaves me with a guilt that sits like a pit in my stomach. Before I know it, I am no longer focused on my favorite Harry Potter movie, but am spiraling into a dark hole once again. I lose myself so far into my thoughts that I almost don't notice that Y/N has stopped the movie and is staring straight at me.

I turn to her. "What is it?"

Y/N furrows her brow, a deep look of concern filling her eyes.

"Spencer, you're crying."

"I am?" I reach up to feel the wet streaks left behind on my cheek. I hadn't even realized. Now not only have I been crying in front of Y/N, but she knows something is wrong. Knowing her, she won't let this go so easily. I also doubt she'll buy any lie I try to feed her. She may not be a profiler, but she sure knows when someone she cares about isn't being genuine with her.

Luckily, she must also know me better than I realize. She doesn't push me too hard for information. She scoots over to my side of the couch before laying a hand on my shoulder. I keep my eyes glued to my lap, avoiding eye contact as best I can. I'm afraid that if I look into her eyes now, I'll completely fall apart. Something about telling your friends about your trauma makes it very real, and I don't want to relive that day, not again.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"I'm not sure..." I answer honestly.

Instead of pushing me, she moves her hand to rub my back as we sit there in silence. Something about the kindness of this gesture finally breaks me. I let my head fall into my hands as tears start streaming down my face, and I don't even bother trying to stop them. I can't hold this back anymore, not from someone who's become like a best friend to me.

We sit there just like that for several minutes, Y/N silently rubbing my back, me crying like a big baby. Part of me feels embarrassed, breaking down like this, but the other part is too tired from holding all of this back to even care anymore.

Finally, I think my body has run out of tears when I hear Y/N say "What can I do? What do you need?" It's so quiet I almost miss it.

"Her name was Maeve." I am surprised to hear the words leave my mouth. I glance over to Y/N to gauge her reaction, but she's only sitting there, listening patiently.

"I started getting these headaches. They became so crippling that they started affecting my work. It scared me because...well my mom is schizophrenic. I guess I have always been a little paranoid about showing symptoms. The doctors ran tests, labs, scans...everything they could think of. As a last resort I reached out to this geneticist. After a bit of correspondence, it wasn't difficult to see that she was brilliant. She seemed to enjoy keeping in touch, so we would write one another letters. We eventually started calling one another. But...she had a stalker. She didn't know who it was or what they wanted, but she was scared. That's why we wrote letters. And I only ever called her from telephone booths, never the same one twice. I ended up sharing a large part of my life with her... One time before hanging up the phone she even said "love you" like it was the most normal thing in the world. I never said it back, but even if what I felt was love I never got the chance to say it to her. Her stalker was a former grad student, and she got to Maeve before I could."

I stop and take in a deep breath, swallowing the growing lump in my throat before continuing.

" She shot herself in front of me, killing Maeve along with her. It was the first time I had ever seen her in person too. It happened a couple months ago. Every time I think i've moved on it feels like the pain starts all over again. I sometimes feel guilty for even trying to move on, for ever being happy."

Y/N doesn't say a word as she lets me speak. She just nods, taking in every word. After a couple minutes of silence, she lets out a large breath before finally opening her mouth to speak.

"Spencer, I can't pretend to even come close to understanding what you are going through. I wish I had the answers. I wish I could tell you when the pain will go away, but the truth is it will probably never fully leave you. Trauma has a way of sticking with us. We learn how to process it and cope with it more efficiently, but it's never truly gone. Now I can't pretend to know what Maeve would have wanted for you, but as your friend who's with you now I want to tell you its okay to be happy. Its also okay to not be okay sometimes. No one has it together all of the time. It's ok to talk about it, to cry about it, and there's no right or wrong time. Trauma has a way of sneaking up on us, triggering us when we least expect it. And whatever you need to be ok, whatever you need to do in order to deal with this, I'm here for you. I'll always be here for you. You can always call me if you need to talk or come over. Even if you just need a distraction from it, if you find yourself slipping into a dark place, you can call me, and we will talk about literally anything else or go find somewhere to grab dessert or watch a movie. If you need someone to just sit with you, I'll be there. What I'm trying to say is whenever you're ready, just tell me what you need and I'll be there for you."

I feel like I could cry again, but luckily I don't. Instead, I turn on the couch to face Y/N and just pull her in for a hug, resting my head on her shoulder. This alone is all I need to at least be okay, even if just for tonight. As someone who lives alone, my only real family living across the US, no one ever really knows just how much I crave touch. It's not exactly like I can just approach JJ, Garcia, or Morgan and say "Hey I could really use a hug today." It's a love language for me, but I go weeks without touching a single person. It wears me down sometimes. Sitting here, hugging Y/N, is the most comforted I have felt in a really long time.

I want to tell her the other reason I'm struggling. About the cravings I have to battle when things are already emotionally challenging. I decide I'm not ready to share that quite yet. It's not that i don't trust her, but if it's going to affect the way she sees me, I want to put that off as long as possible.

I also take a minute to go over the words she's said to me. I can't help but notice her tone, her body language, the look on her face. She may be great at comforting people, especially since it's part of her job, but those were the words of someone who knew. She spoke from a place of fully understanding trauma, which tells me one thing: She has had trauma of her own. I make a mental note to bring it up later. I don't want to push her, but I want to make sure she knows she has the same support from me incase she ever needs to talk.

We sit there for a few more minutes, her arms wrapped around me. My breathing eventually slows down as I try to get my sniffles under control. I feel my head start to pound from how hard I have been crying. I sit back to rub my hands into my temples. Y/N stands up and makes her way into the kitchen, returning a couple minutes later with a cold water bottle, a box of tissues, and some aspirin.

She starts to walk out of the room before turning to me.

"I think I've got something that might help you feel a little better. It can't heal with heartbreak, but maybe it can help you to relax and take your mind off everything, if even for a little while."

"Y/N, you take care of people all day at work you don't have to..,"

"Hey!" She cuts me off before I can finish. "Why do you think I became a nurse huh? I enjoy taking care of people. And if I can help, even just a little, I won't feel so completely useless in this situation."

"Y/N, you've already helped. Just listening, being here with me. But I guess its no use arguing with you, you're too stubborn." A small breathy laugh leaves my nose and I glance up to see a small smile before she steps out of the room.

She returns a few minutes later and doesn't say a word. Instead she grabs both my hands and pulls me off the couch, leading me into the guest bathroom.

A take a look around at everything she had gotten ready.

"A bubble bath?" I shoot her a look of uncertainty.

"Just trust me okay." She rolls her eyes playfully. "I'll be in the living room. Just shout if you need me okay?"

I decide to just go with it. She leaves, shutting the door behind her and flipping of the lights. The room is suddenly glowing in light from candles scattered all around the bathroom. After slipping into the bath, I tense up at how hot the water is before it finally relaxes all my muscles. Breathing in, I notice the smell of eucalyptus and lavender filling the air. There is also a bluetooth speaker in the corner, softly playing zen spa music with the trickle of a rain in the background.

I have to admit, this is the most relaxed I have felt in...well I can't remember ever feeling this relaxed. Baths always seemed a bit girly, but this was incredibly therapeutic. I may have to try this again after my next difficult case.

When I finally decide to get out, I realize I'll have to change back into the same clothes. I quickly realize Y/N had also laid out a  star wars t shirt and black sweatpants for me. She thought of everything. With her being on the taller side and enjoying baggy clothes, they actually fit me fairly well.

When I finally step back into the living room she looks up at me and grins.

"Looking good Dr. Reid!"

She never calls me that, and for some reason it makes me blush just slightly. She pats the spot next to her on the couch, signaling for me to come over.

"Well, how do you feel?"

"Umm I wasn't sure about the whole bath thing but... I feel fantastic actually! How did you know that would help?"

"When you do what I do, you have to find multiple ways to unwind" she laughs.

I glance down at the shirt I'm wearing.

"So Star Wars huh?"

Y/N smirks "Are you really that surprised?"

I answer with a laugh "No I suppose not."

"Well I hope you like them too, because that's what I had lined up when it was my turn to pick for movie night!"

I can't help but hide a giant grin. I was happy to hear she wanted to continue our movie nights. Between all the Harry Potter movies and Star Wars movies combined, it seemed like we'd be spending a lot more time together.

"Is it okay if we finish the movie?" I am hoping I didn't completely ruin the night with my breakdown.

"I thought you'd never ask" she smiles before turning to the TV and resuming the movie.

As I watch the characters making their way into the shrieking shack, I feel my eyes grow heavy. I guess I had gotten a little too relaxed, as I am now struggling to stay awake through the rest of the movie.

When I open my eyes I notice the room is no longer glowing from the light of the TV but from the daylight streaming in through the windows. I realize i'm stretched across Y'N's couch, under one of her many fuzzy blankets. I sit up and look around, noticing Y/N is no longer there. After checking her kitchen and bedroom, I start to worry. Before I start to call her on the phone, I notice movement outside the window. I make my way onto the patio balcony to see her sitting on her bench with a book in her hands. At the sound of the door, she looks up and meets my gaze, smiling as she closes her book.

"Good morning sunshine" she says laughing just a bit.

"What happened?" I ask, joining her on the bench outside, running my hands through my hair as I attempt to fully wake up.

"Well, after awhile I noticed you fell asleep. I really thought it would be best to just let you get your rest."

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to..." I start before she cuts me off.

"Its no problem! Not last night and not any other time. You are always welcome here." She gives me a warm, genuine smile. I know this is a sincere offer, one I'm sure I will take her up on again.