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#this is so insanely late i am not even going to try to tag anyone in it
holysweetnachofries · 2 years
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how do you guys make any friends in your universities, i've tried talking a lot (considering how socially anxious i normally am most of the time) but i still can't land a single circle and it makes me really sad
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chris-continues · 10 months
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i am. so hopelessly in love with knives. hes so pretty and i want to hold hands and kiss maybe… so i was wondering if you could write some uncanny knives relationship HC’s ? i love him very much. (and thank you for listening to my insane ramblings)
OUGH YES of course anon :> tysm for sending this ask! Feel free to send as many as you’d like, I love any ideas from anyone hehe.
Tags: @lune010 @knivesdears1nner @beanibon
This is an imagine so it’s just my jumbled thoughts thrown together, also:
TW: GORE, INHUMAN BODILY FEATURES AND SLIGHT GORE!! (This is uncanny/monstrous knives so… duh. But Yk) AND CREEPY BEHAVIOR
Uncanny knives finds joy in terrifying humans. Of course, you’re hideously down bad (cough, the monster lover tag you follow. You know who you are), and manage to enjoy him even more. It’s annoying when he’s been trying to shake you for a few weeks now, about a month, but he’s grown to.. tolerate your presence. You both have grown into some sort of companionship.
You’ve never touched him before, but when he was initially trying to scare you, he tore his jaw open, unhinging it to show off his rows upon rows of razor sharp teeth and inhumanly long tongue. You could feel his breath against you, somehow cold and fanning along your cheeks. Your pupils dilated, and of course he noticed this.
Strange. You were perhaps stranger than he was.
That was the closest the two of you had gotten. Nowadays, when you go to visit him in the strangely abandoned building, he’ll lead you into the woods or stay in the warehouse. Either way, you follow him in amusement. As of late, you’d taken to giving him gifts- such as little trinkets you’d found that you thought he’d like. A small succulent, (which he waters and cares for, though he doesn’t note such a thing. You’ve noticed that it hasn’t died yet.. so), or a blanket for him. He must get cold, right? Maybe? (He doesn’t, really, but he keeps in tucked away anyways when he misses your smell).
One night though, you find yourself too tired to drive home. He notices this, and he think he recalls Vash (who had gone out into town more than he had) said it was unsafe for humans to drive when sleepy. So he made you stay.
“You can’t drive like that,” he scoffs, “I figured you weren’t that foolish.”
You end up falling asleep on the floor, and when you wake..
There’s the blanket you gave him, draped over you. He watches you sleep from the corner, guarding you silently.
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sansxfuckyou · 1 year
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Compact Confessional
Summary: Mysterion is holding something from the rest of the Freedom Pals. They should respect his privacy, they really should- but they only take it as a challenge.
Warnings: Suggestive themes, privacy breach, betrayal of trust, swearing, feral behavior (in Kite), the authors attempt at humor, heavy guilt, interrogation, it gets worse but then it gets better guys, I promise
Authors Note: hurgh K2, with the additional flavor of kitesterion because I went batshit over the AU to an insane degree. I have no clue when the Ao3 port is dropping. Sorry if some of the colored text, isnt colored. And fair warning, this badboy levels around 10K words, tumblr starts to lag around 7.5K for anyone curious. it is almost 3 AM (do artists ever stay up insanely late to finish big projects and get so sleepy they forget the hotkey for the eraser tool? I wouldn't know, but somewhere along the line I kept trying to write segue way with a Q because I was fucking disoriented) I need to go to sleep right the fuck now
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Mysterion is keeping something from the Freedom Pals, he's keeping something from all of them. Maybe if he was willing to talk about it with someone everyone wouldn't find it so intriguing. Maybe then everyone wouldn't want to know what it is that's so fucking important that no one is allowed to know about it.
Super Craig tries to act like it's nothing super big, aware that if everybody paid no mind to it that it might come out faster. Tupperware followed suite with the idea, Wonder Tweek tagging in as well. Other members of their franchise were a lot less… subtle, about their interest in Mysterions secret, whatever it is. The Coon is practically begging him every single day to tell him what it is, Call Girl even joins in. Toolshed is pretty sure the both of them are just making things worse it they want Mysterion to come clean.
Human Kite is the only one that refuses to meddle at all, even Doctor Timothy has tried getting a peek in Mysterions mind. The alien is the only one that sits there and listens to him bitch about how annoying they are. The only one that pauses to look and listen and take in every visual and audible cue because that's what he's known to do since he first landed way back when. It tells him a lot about his teammates if nothing else.
Still.
Mysterion- no, Kenny McCormick is hiding something from his friends. And given the fact that it's barely coming out even when he's in a state of delirium or terribly wounded, it must be something big.
It's starting to piss off Kyle a little bit.
-/-/-/-
"Thanks for letting me hang out for a bit man," Kenny said as he pulled on his orange parka. He opted to leave his bleached cargo shorts and purple everything else in a pile on Kyles bedroom floor. It was easy to do that when the alien offered to wash them, "Chilling with Cartman all the time definitely does not do wonders for ones mental health."
Kyle gives a laugh, the kind that leaves teeth too sharp on full display. "Totally, I swear to fuck that asshole needs therapy," He stills his tail from wagging like he's a little kid, except, when he was a little kid he tied his tail up so it wouldn't be exposed in an all too human world. An extremely uncaring world for anything different then what they know as normalcy.
"He needs so much therapy," Kenny answered with, "See you tomorrow?"
"On our patrol, I'll make sure your suit is washed," Kyle said, throwing an arm to the side, an invitation for a hug. He wouldn't be sad if Kenny didn't take it, but he still can't help the way his heart skips several beats when he gets one. An anchoring tightness enveloping him, squeezing a comfortable amount on his rib cage that would hurt if he was human.
"Thanks Kyle," Kenny said quietly, head propped near Kyles shoulder but not quite tall enough to rest it on top. He pushes himself on his tippy toes to press the top of his head to the bottom of Kyles chin. He takes a dramatic step back and maybe Kyles tail is swaying a little bit with a silky soft comfort residing on his skin. He clasps his hands together, "Tomorrow."
"Yeah man, see you then," Kyle said, the instant he realized his tail was doing the thing he stilled it entirely. He felt a slight singe of cyan embarrassment. Stupid alien anatomy. Giving away how he feels.
Kenny pivots on his heel and gives a wave, "See ya man!" His steps are light and Kyle is watching with maybe a little bit too much intent.
He has zero legal rights to do so, but emotional and psychological rights? He has plenty. The first one being that he might've imprinted on Kenny the second his family landed on earth. He might've latched onto both Mysterion and Kenny like an orphan duckling in his childhood era of existing- so much so that he couldn't help the absolute giddiness when he learned they were the same. Maybe he got a little bit too attached to Kenny compared to everyone else in a human sense. But in an alien sense, in his instinctual sense, he was the perfect amount of attached considering how he thought of Kenny.
The second reason he stared was because Kenny had an undeniably amazing ass. That wasn't just personal opinion either, they held a vote after a particularly odd argument in the Freedom Pals lair. Kenny won by an absolute fucking landslide in the votes and voter fraud having taken place can't be confirmed or denied by anyone.
Except for Doctor Timothy of course.
And if there is a god, Kyle is praying everyday that the human one makes sure that Doctor Timothy doesn't look into the legitimacy of the votes.
Kyle barely drags himself back from his thoughts, he's been told he can get lost in them sometimes. His tail is wagging again, the multicolored diamond-like frills undulate a little bit. He swings the front door shut reluctantly when he can't see Kenny anymore. He tugs off his gloves and tosses them in a pile alongside his hat, letting the splotchy cyan coloration of his skin show. He makes his way up to his bedroom, but he finds his impossibly human little brother standing in his doorway.
"Ike, get out of the way," Kyle said sternly, giving a bit of a growl under his voice. His adoptive brother just quirks a brow in that annoying manner he learned from the humans.
Ike clears his throat, "No."
"Well why not?" Kyle questioned, growl snuffed and replaced with something louder and more resonant, it vibrated in his brothers flesh. It was something that Ike long since lost the ability to be intimidated by.
"When are you gonna stop inviting over your little posse of partners eh?" Ike asked, crossing one arm over the other. His tone was nothing but accusatory, Kyle saw through it.
"Are you jealous?" Came Kyles instant reaction.
"No," Ike responded with far too fast to be true.
"I'll play some video games with you on Thursday," Kyle offered.
Ike moved out of the way, "Enjoy wallowing in your disgusting room bud."
Kyle ignored him with nothing more than an eye roll, he made a point of slamming his door shut. He kicked aside a small heap of whatever, a mix of something or other he'd been intending to clean up. He gently picks up a small stack of comics Kenny had lent him and places them on his desk. Right beside the Mysterion charm. And the Mysterion action figure. And the other pieces of shitty Mysterion merchandise he had bought.
Okay, yeah, maybe he had a little bit too much Mysterion merchandise. He was just trying to put some extra cash into Kenny's pocket for when money is tight around the house. He just wanted to make sure his best friend was living a decent life, it wouldn't be enough to give him the life Kyle knew Kenny deserved, but it would help.
He takes hold of Kennys outfit and empties the contents of the pockets into a small bin. Loose change, granola bar wrappers, pocket knife, lock pick, the usual stuff he carried around for hero duties and then some. Kyle shakes the hood loose of any twigs or leaves and something large enough to clatter as it hits the metal netting of the bin falls out. His pointed ear gives a flick at the noise, he's dropping to the ground and pulling it out in a second.
He's completely enveloped in the mystery of what was hidden in Kennys hood because A: fucking genius hiding spot, and B: this could be what Kenny was hiding. It could be exactly what Kenny was trying so hard to keep under the radar, what he successfully kept hidden from everyone's prying eyes.
He came up with a tape, jet black, scratched plastic and a cracked see through window bit. There are silver markings across the black, seemingly unpredictable and laid out with either sharpie ink or a paint pen. The paper label is coffee stained and reads the date, recorded last month (why it's still on Kennys person is odd). The log number is left blank, presumably stated in the recording.
It was a jackpot and somewhere in the back of Kyles mind he knew he should ignore it. He knew this was shattering every rule in the book and that he'd be shattering his friendship with Kenny, Mysterion and Human Kite would probably stop being a dynamic duo at that.
But, he needed to know.
He absolutely fucking needed to know.
He wouldn't dare speak it too anyone ever, and he'd return it to the hood right afterwards. He wouldn't even tell Kenny that he listened to it, he'd just sleep at night knowing exactly what Kennys secret is. And that would be more than good enough for Kyle, he wouldn't need anything else.
He reaches blindly for his cassette player, the one he's held onto since he was young. One of his earliest earthly possessions, one he still cherished and used every day. He popped out the cassette already inside and gently placed the pilfered audio into it. He eagerly grabs his earbuds before pressing play.
Professor Chaos is pretty fucking sure doing this shit is helping out my mental state or whatever He doesn't know what he's dealing with He doesn't know that he's playing with fire trying to get me to spill my guts on his fancy therapy chair But, here I am, sitting on top of the police station fully decked out in my Mysterion persona just chatting it up with myself again
I already know exactly what the problem here is Chaos, the center of this massive shitfuck that even paid therapy couldn't fix!
I've probably said that a million times in every one of these stupid fucking recordings... shit I forgot to do that log date ha!
Ahem, log three, topic. Whatever comes out of my fucking mouth.
Kyle presses pause hesitantly.
Oh god.
This is an audio diary, just for spilling Kennys guts.
And he's listening to it.
He should stop. He really, truly, should.
But he doesn't.
Instead he presses play.
Where were we? Right, right, just saying whatever shit that comes to my mind . . . I'm pretty sure that Kyle thinks I can't see him stare at me whenever I fucking bend over or walk away I'm not complaining, I'm flattered really But jeez man just say it outright if you think I have a hot ass
The pause button is slammed this time.
Kyles face is burning up because Kenny knew apparently, he knew that Kyle stared at him at every chance he gets. He feels his stomach twist a bit because oh man, he got caught staring and Kenny didn't even mention. The usage of 'you' makes Kyle feel even more called out on the matter.
He could drop out now, maybe that's the secret, that Kenny knows he stares. He could sleep at night saying that's the thing he's keeping hidden.
I can't talk much if you put everything into consideration But still! Human Kite himself staring at my ass . . . That's fucking awesome if I'm being honest I would hope I'm being honest cause who else is gonna listen to the truth aside from this stupid tape
Like, I'm just doing whatever and I can feel it He is staring holes into me, somedays it's like he's hitting me with those fucking laser eyes! That'd be hilarious actually One second I'm loading a dishwasher and the next my ass is on fire because he couldn't help but stare The Coon would be laughing about that till he's dead
So would Toolshed
And Call Girl
And Mosquito
We'd all get a good laugh out of it
Except for Human Kite
I think he would die of embarrassment if he lit my ass on fire It'd be adorable Bright blue face, ears drooping the slightest bit, maybe his tail would do something I don't know He'd probably say sorry a lot All I know is that after I'm done putting out the fire I'd say "it's fine!" And then I'd think about how cute he looks for weeks on end
Fuck he's absolutely amazing in every sense of the word God, I'm supposed to use these to rant about my shitty family Not gush about my partner in heroics . Oh well
He's perfect! I swear on my mothers grave he is everything That grin he gets whenever he's about to blow someone sky high I can see almost all of his fangs when he does it, which are fucking scary by the way But I'll be damned if it isn't a little bit hot to think about He could kill me and I'll love him He could do absolutely anything to me and I'd still want him so fucking much
And!
And, and, and There's this little thing he does whenever he gets happy Where the weird bits on his tail like, shake? They move, his tail also wags But the frills don't move unless he's actually happy He can fake the wag but he can't fake the frills moving
It's so fucking cute and weird and different I love it
Anyways! This is South Parks number one worst superhero coming to you live from the top of the police station!
. . .
Shit I think someone heard me
Kyle is paralyzed as the tape ends, letting every single word soak into his brain. His tail is doing the thing, it's wagging. Every nerve in his body is alight and he feels his stomach twisting into knots. His claws are digging into the plastic of the tape player as he just stares. His eyes end up resting on his desk, his laptop, with all of his external attachments.
There's a rush to his movements as he grabs it and the oddest, most useless, thing he owns. A reverse recorder of sorts, a simple thing he crafted but never thought he'd have a chance to use. He flips open the top and jams the plug into it's socket before sliding the cassette as gently as possible into the gadget. He should not be doing this, he really shouldn't be doing this.
But he can't keep the cassette to keep hold of the audio, he needs too extract it if he ever wants to hear it again. Which is wrong, and bad, and he absolutely needs to stop but he isn't. He's clicking 'extract' and watching that loading bar fill up gratingly slow.
He places down his laptop gently and balls up the fabrics before leaving. There's a twist of wrong in his gut, but he ignores it as he swings open the washing machine door. He knows how fucking wretched this is, that he'll be absolutely ruined if anyone finds out. He won't be able to live down the shame of having anyone catch word that he knows the secret. That he knows what it is that's keeping Kenny wound up so tightly.
He'll just keep his mouth shut.
Real easy.
Real simple.
-/-/-/-
Kyle might be abusing the knowledge he garnered from the tape, maybe a little bit. He might be curling up next Kenny a little bit more than often, hunched under a flowing purple cape like a cougar despite the height difference. Just maybe he's resting his head atop Kenny's a little bit more than usual, purring a little bit louder whenever he comes into contact with Kenny.
He really doesn't care though, maybe there's a twisted sense of catharsis he gets from the knowledge that yes, it's reciprocated, despite doing nothing to change it. Being awkward homies acting like there's nothing going on below the surface is entirely acceptable and everything that he's wanted from Kenny the second his family landed. Definitely. Absolutely. He didn't imprint. He absolutely did not imprint. He killed off that instinct way back in fourth grade.
Right after he met Kenny.
One second too late. And he is one hundred percent sure everyone in his family can see it, even Ike! Except, the little shit will hold it over him if he gets a chance. Taunting and teasing that Kyle imprinted on his best friend instead of literally anyone else. Of course, the asshole knows better what with every member of his family sporting claws made to rend flesh.
"Kyle!"
The Broflovski perks up a bit at his name being called. Stan sits down across from him, sliding his safety glasses off as he does so.
"You good man?" Stan asked, Kyle nodded.
"I'm great, amazing even," Kyle said, he gestured vaguely as he spoke.
Stan stayed silent for a moment.
Kyle heaved a heavy sigh, "I think I fucked up the first day I landed."
"That was years ago, and just now it's affecting you?" Stan asked. He kicked up his feet to rest on the table.
"Yeah, and Kenny's sort of being an ass. He can trust us, he can trust us more than anyone else in this fucking town!" There's an exasperated exhale as he comes down from the near shout, "How come he's not telling us?"
Stan shrugged, "That's his business, if he doesn't want to tell us, just respect that."
"But-"
"Respect it," Stan pressed, "He might fess up to you first if you just give him time."
"I doubt it," Kyle muttered, barely loud enough for Stan to hear. His tail is snaking around his waist tightly. Tight enough he can feel it sting just a bit.
"Dude. Firstly, calm down," Stan said, Kyle glared at him. The ravenette simply gestured to the prehensile appendage squeezing the air from Kyle's lungs. He drops it, "Secondly, you're his best friend. If he's telling anyone it'll be you."
Kyle gave a hesitant nod, "Yeah, that makes sense."
Stan gave him a grin, comforting, grounding. He dropped down his feet and leaned over the table, holding out a hand. Kyle placed his atop Stan's, his hand was larger. Cyan tinted fingertips tapping along an open palm, "It's fine man, he'll tell us soon enough. It's not like he can keep a secret forever."
"No, you're right man. He can't keep a secret from us forever," Kyle said, a small grin on his face as Stan tightened his grip.
"Now stop stressing so much," Stan said, "Go get some calamari or whatever."
-/-/-/-
Kyle finds the next tape in a vent on top of Unplanned Parenthood while he's on a mission. He's quick to slide it into his pocket before Mysterion can notice. He can't just, jeopardize this discovery, he isn't even sure if he can call it a discovery if he's sure of what it is.
A shoulder collides with him and he stumbles just a bit. His arms are quick to push Mysterion right back up again. There's a crack down his lips and he looks to Kyle, "Get your head in the game, Kite!"
A blast of something or other comes straight at them and there's a brief second of hesitation before Mysterion is tossed out of the way and Kyle is ducking. The blonde is easily caught again and placed down, "Gladly," He takes Mysterion's hand, "Show me how?"
There's a smirk, bone chilling to many but it only makes Kyle's stomach flutter. Mysterion tightens his grip briefly, "Let's go then."
He's quick to launch Kyle forward with a running start, the alien tackling down whichever thug is on them now. Claws detract and tear through silver hued gloves as he snarls, easily dwarfing the goon. They're shaking as Kyle bares his fangs, tail thrashing about and body hunched in a predatory stance. Is he snarling? He is, he's proud of it too as he brings himself to be face to face.
He rears back on his knees, clawed hand raised and ready to slash. He goes to tear open their throat, but a grasp at the back of his collar prevents him. It short circuits him a little bit as the fabric of gloves press against cool skin.
"My friend here isn't exactly human," Mysterion said calmly as he released Kyle's costume. He stayed still and glanced up to Mysterion.
There's a shaky nod from the thug.
"Now, you have two options," Mysterion said. His tongue briefly slid between lips to capture the blood seeping from the crack. He circled around the dropped person a bit more, "Number one, you leave. You run to Canada, and never bother us again."
No response.
"Number two, Human Kite kills you. Right here," Mysterion snaps his fingers and as practiced Kyle gnashes his fangs with a growl, "Right now."
"I'll run! I'll leave!" The convict practically screamed.
"Fine, Kite?" Mysterion said. Claws come down atop the goons eye, deep enough to scar and maybe to go blind in one eye. Kyle stands up, red contrasting the cyan of his fingertips, he watches them run and revels in it.
Once they're far off, darting down staircases and running through the streets, does Mysterion take a seat. He drops down on the roof and Kyle takes a seat beside him, frilled tail wrapping around Mysterion's waist. A hand comes to push back the hood and he leans his head on Kyle's shoulder.
"Dude, being a hero is so sucky," Kenny said with a light laugh, "I just wanna get killed sometimes."
Kyle gives a hum.
"I just come back anyways, but we seriously haven't faced anyone actually dangerous in years," Kenny said, gesturing vaguely as he spoke to drive in the point.
"Definitely," Kyle said, Kenny dropped down onto his back. Kyle leans back to meet him in eye contact.
"I miss when this shit was fun," Kenny said, a sigh on his voice as he spoke.
"I think that most of us do," Kyle answered with. His tongue, forked, flickered out for a brief second.
"You're just like a snake man," Kenny said.
Cyan rose to Kyle's face, "The hell is that supposed to mean?"
"Like, your tongue. It looks like a snakes, forked," Kenny said, he did the spock thing with his hands as if to display forked. He stuck out his tongue at the same time, "It's really fucking cool. You got some scales right? And those weird little ridges on your back? All of those are snake-y things, Kyle."
"Yeah, cause I'm a freakish little dude," Kyle said extravagantly, as if to make his point he gave a set jazz hands, gloves off to expose to smallest bit of cyan webbing. He sticks out his tongue between too sharp teeth, "Absolutely monstrous."
"I'd hardly say 'little' is the word for you, ya six foot monster," Kenny taunted back, "And I love ya for that man."
Kyle barely beats down the intensifying flush on his face, "Well, won't stop me from being at least a little bit snake like. It's more fun to be a weird creature than a human anyways," He drops down and nudges Kenny's shoulder with his head until he sits up and nudges off the silvery cape. A hand rests in a tangle of red curls for a brief moment before the alien curls around Kenny's back.
"You're also very... Cat. Very feline. Very not human," Kenny said, words teasing but loving nonetheless.
He rested his hand on top of Kyle's head, gently sifting through a sea of red. He leaned back on his friends torso a little bit as he brought a second hand to run through Kyle's hair. He shifted around a bit to rest almost on his knees, facing Kyle just a bit more. His side pressed to Kyle's lower rib cage, his hands didn't leave the redheads hair for a second. He slid down his friends face just a bit, callused thumbs briefly brushing over the ever sensitive auricle fins he had. Were they fins? Not quite, just cyan flares at the base of pointed ears.
He let his fingers scritch just past the back of Kyle's ears, resting atop the buzzed patch of hair. Olive green eyes fluttered shut as Kenny just rubbed right there, the sweet spot. He slumps into Kenny's hands, chin resting at the heel of his palm (he can't see the gentle smile on Kenny's face).
The blonde nearly explodes when Kyle starts to purr. It starts soft, but it slowly grows, shaking Kenny down to his core with his side pressed against Kyle's diaphragm. Or his lungs. Or his whatever it is that makes that wonderful rumbling sound giving Kenny enough serotonin to live forever. He already will, but this is making that eternity sound a lot more bearable. Then he hears a thudding- three, soft thumps before it resets and happens again. His tail is wagging, Kyle really likes being scratched behind the ears apparently.
Kenny's pretty sure he's falling asleep with the pads of his finger, despite being rough and scratchy, gently rubbing behind his ears. He lifts his fingers for a second too long and Kyle opens up his eyes, "Why'd you stop?" He sounds groggy and disappointed, he stops purring.
Kenny picks up the motions, "You were falling asleep," He tosses his cape over Kyle's form.
Kyle lazily blinks, one eye, then the other. He shrugs the best he can, "And?"
"Good point," Kenny said on a hum as he twirls a finger through curls, a light tug.
Kyle's tail starts to thud again and he's sure the afterglow of this will never fade.
-/-/-/-
Kyle's feeling a little bit guilty about tuning into this tape.
Not nearly enough to make him stop though.
He drops down on his bed comfortably, he doesn't even bother to put in his earbuds. His parents are out for the weekend, his brother is at Kenny's to hang out with Karen, presumably fishing. He knows that he's bound to get a call from Ike sometime in the night for a ride, for Ike, Karen, and maybe even Kenny if it's really rough. But, he'll have enough time to listen to the entirety of it.
He presses play.
I think shits getting worse I'm not using these things properly I should be using these for literally anything else! I could talk about how much I worry about my sister, or my money problems, or whatever!
But I'm still using these tapes for just a few little things
Mostly talking about Kite Not gonna use his actual name this time cause someone heard me last week I'm pretty sure I ran them out of town For good
Do I feel bad about that?
Absolutely not
Gotta protect a mans privacy, even if that means blood and intimidation Which uh, I swear it didn't involve blood This time at least
Now, log number... nine? I'm pretty sure this is number nine I would go back and check 'em all out again, but I lost one of them No clue where the little fucker went But it's gone
Kyle pauses the tape. There's missing ones- he needs to find it before Kenny does. He can just put it back later, like he'll do with this one after he's done thoroughly listening to it. He put back the last one, slid it back into the hidden pocket and acted like it never happened.
Of course, since then he's always checked the hidden pocket whenever he got a chance to do so. But, he's been unlucky in terms of finding any up until this one which leaves him with the idea that the rest have been planted around town. He shuts off his rampant train of thought- he is not going to try and sleuth out all of the tapes. He still has some respect for Kenny's privacy, he still has some intention to keep their friendship intact, and most importantly, he still has full intention of never acting on any of what he hears in said tapes.
That would give away that he's been listening to them, a risk he can't take. He clicks the button again.
Look, I always knew Kite was a weird one Everyone does The guys alien, so we cut him some slack on human things that go mostly unspoken
Conversational subtext, call frequency, having beer on ice- simple shit
And in turn, we also try to learn a bit about his species culture I don't even know if species is the right word Does that make me racist? Are aliens even a race to be racist against? Could I even discriminate if only... Three, exist on earth?
So many questions, so little time
Of course, there isn't exactly a lot about his kind I doubt there's a lot of his kind His mom keeps making quips about how all of them would come to earth if it was easier to integrate But honestly? If you just got rid of the alien extremities I would not be able to tell that Kite isn't human
Same with his parents The lot of them blend in perfectly Don't know why she stresses so much And even if they didn't, they have a human to vouch for them A bunch of humans actually
There's a brief pause where Kyle let's himself think about that for a moment. He's never had a chance to think about it before. He doesn't really dwell on it for longer than a minute, flipping himself onto his stomach. His tail lazily sways back and forth as he listens/
I think I got off point there
Allow me to relocate and get back to what I was supposed to be talking about
. . .
There is a fucking line, Kite! You stay on your side of the line! You can't just walk over to my side! Just waltz on over like you own the fucking place! And just, act like it's no big deal! You just sit down right next to me. Like. Right next to me, are thighs are fucking pressed against each other and you lean into me! You just, push your head up against my shoulder like a fucking cat until I give you attention
Which I always do I'm weak
And then you start purring, and your tail does a dumb little wag! And I'm sitting there, begging and pleading, that I don't do something dumb You're putty in my fucking hands Asking me to just shower you in attention! I do, I always do- I always sit there and give you attention
Whatever it is you want I'd give it to you I'd do it for you Anything, for you
The voice softens just a bit, lowering itself. He sounded so very, very mad. Not even mad, just agitated. His voice is heady, wrapped into the narrative he's spinning so accurately. Kyle feels his stomach flip at the words droning so deeply into his skull. The notions made his skin tingle, heart pulsating so very fast he wouldn't be shocked if it exploded all at once.
But no! I stay on my side of the line Like a good boy
Because I don't wanna freak him out Or scare him off
I feel like such a fucking perv And I am a bit pervy I am fully aware of the fact that I am known to stare if someone fine is walking by
But.
To stare at Kite? To want Kite?
It definitely caught me off guard
And he isn't human He doesn't get it I touch him I feel like I'm dirtying him Even if it's just a high five! I have too much on mind for this shit
I see that idiot and you know what I wanna to do?
Do you even wanna to know what I want do to him?
Kyle slams the pause button, he can feel his nerves shoot up in shock. His tail has went from lazily thumping back and forth to wagging like that of a dogs. The minute ridges on his back are shaking, just a bit. He may be mildly cold-blooded, but right now he really can't tell.
He looks down at his hands and they're entirely cyan, normally just a little bit at the tips. The hue shoots up his forearms. He can practically hear his heartbeat pounding in his chest, the sound bangs back and forth in his skull.
Oh.
Oh he's opened up a massive can of worms with this tape.
He keeps listening
I'd just
.
I would-
.
Fuck man I can't even say it out loud I don't know what I was thinking!
I'm sitting on top of city hall and I was about to go off about how I'd fuck him!
Could I even fuck him? Are the species compatible? Do aliens even have reproductive organs?
They must They totally do How else do they, how do they reproduce? Eggs?
. . . Nasty
But I would fucking worship him I would do whatever he asked me too Even if he's too unversed in human reproduction to ask me too fuck him up I'd still do what he asks me too
You wanna go out at that new pizza place that charges by the minute? Let's go darling
You wanna go check out the newest arcade cabinet? Baby, the cars already running
You want me to get your logo as a tramp stamp? I might not do that one actually . That's a lie I'd do anything for him
. . .
God, I'm such a mess I need real therapy
Kyle has long since buried his face in a pillow to muffle his screams (although they're closer to high pitched squeals) and cover his ears. He feels like he's running a fever, a really, really bad fever. Every square inch of his body is on fire and he can't care much that he's clawing into his pillow, downy soft feathers spilling from gouges.
He's drawing a blank.
A complete and utter blank.
He hears the click signalling it's over and he feels his stomach twist in regret.
It's a lot easier to hide that you know something if said something isn't... that, whole thing that just happened. His ears are ringing a little bit as the words ping around the sides of his head, like a game of Pong. The pillow is still keeping his face covered as he rolls onto his back, then his side, then his front, and his side again, knees pressed flush against the wall. Fuck, he feels like he's sixteen all over again, and that was just three years ago! He's too young to be having moments like this.
He mechanizes his breathing, eyes wide open as he stares at the darkness of the space themed pillow case in front of him. Sheer darkness with the occasional blip of a lighter hue. His tail is still thrashing, whipping back and forth madly, he's sure it would scuff the wall if it hit it.
He has to come down from his safe space eventually. Even if that safe space is merely a pillow pressed to his face.
He tosses aside the pillow and rolls onto his back and just stares at the ceiling.
His entire existence has officially been flipped on it's head.
He hears his cell phone ring and he reaches for it, answering before even checking whose calling. He gives a cracked, "Hello?"
"Dude are you good? You sound like you've just been crying," Came Kenny's voice, concern laid on thick.
Kyle nearly hangs upon the spot but instead he bites his tongue and doesn't say a word.
"Look man, dads being a bit of an ass, and Ike was wondering if you could come pick him up for the umpteenth time," Kenny said. He gave a hum, "Could Karen tag along?"
"Totally man," Kyle answered with as he sat up, trying so hard to still his tail. It swiped back and forth atop the blankets, he felt a little bit wrong about not telling Kenny what he knew right now. But, this is a bad time to do that, any Kyle can lie his way out of it again. He hesitates before adding, "You need an escape too?"
"It'd be nice, but you already sound tired. Did I catch you at a bad time? Were you perhaps 'jacking it', my fine, alien friend?" Kenny asked tauntingly, his smugness was palatable.
Kyle wished he could just say 'yeah' and move on instead of carefully think over his next words. Life would much simpler if his head didn't catch on the usage of 'fine' in referral to himself. His mouth felt dry but he choked out some words anyways. "Dude, what makes you think I even have a dick? I got that weird ass alien biology, don't I?""
There's a laugh on the other side, "Hey man, not all of my shots are gonna be spot on. But really, if you don't want me over I won't come," There's an tenderness to his voice and the contrast to the almost gritty and desperate tone he had on the tape gives Kyle whiplash.
"You can if you want too, but I'll probably pass out pretty fast," Kyle lied. He'd just lay in bed, wide awake, for potentially hours with Kenny on the floor beside him. That's how it usually went at least.
"Going full on feral like you did earlier takes a lot out of you, doesn't it?" Kenny asked.
Silence.
"Silent treatment, did I strike a nerve bud? Regardless, we'll be out front in ten," Kenny said, "I can make you some hot coco if you'd like."
"That'd be nice," Was Kyle's weak response.
-/-/-/-
The night was a lot more tense than either of them wanted it to be.
They usually shared a hug before actually getting into bed and trying to pass out. And if not that then Kyle would subtly demand some time to just, co-exist, in very close proximity to each other. In even more minimal situations, they would just share some words of 'love you bro' and call it a night.
None of that transpired.
"I can just go home man," Kenny offered at the break of two AM.
Kyle rolled over to the edge of his bed, leaning over it just a bit, "It's fine."
"Is something wrong? Cause like, you've just been acting... off, lately," Kenny said gently as he propped himself on his elbows, both resting on his pillow.
"Nothings wrong," Kyle said, he crossed his arms and rested his chin on them, "I am gonna ask my parents some questions when they get back."
"About what?" Kenny asked quietly, as though he were afraid of shattering the night if he spoke too loud. The navy walls cast deep blue across the room, reflecting the moonlight in a comfortable darkness.
Kyle stayed silent.
"Alien stuff?" Kenny asked.
Kyle nodded, "Yeah, alien stuff."
"Fun," Kenny answered with a scoff. He dropped back down again and turned to face Kyle, Kyle's bed frame at least, "But for real, you're just- somethings going on in your head. I can tell."
Kyle shrugged, "It's stupid."
"I won't judge man, you're my best friend," Kenny said. And he said it in such a way that for a brief second Kyle forgot about the tapes entirely.
"How are you supposed to talk to someone about something you don't want too?" Kyle asked, trying to withhold and give equal amounts of information.
Kenny paused, "Work out the words in your head. Practice once or twice, maybe even record it. Figure out what needs to be reworked. Write it out if you must- just get it out of your head."
Kyle nodded.
"Trust me man, the second it's out of your head and off your shoulders, life will be easier," Kenny explained reassuringly, "Even if it's only for a second or two."
"Thanks bro," Kyle said quietly.
"Least I can do," Kenny said.
There's a beat of hesitance, "Love you man."
"Love you too," And then Kenny turns away from him, tugging the blanket up to his shoulders.
-/-/-/-
Kyle's pretty sure that Kenny is onto him at this rate, but, he tries to ignore the terrible slithering sensation that he's been caught.
He just focuses on whatever comes next.
This time it's none other than The Coon himself deciding he needs to bring something up with Kyle. Silence drenches the room in the worst way possible as he sits across from the hybrid. Furred ears are swiveled to face Kyle and it makes him feel impossibly nervous, he knows that Cartman can hear his heartbeat. Can it hear pick up speed when Stan sits down beside him, even more so when Wendy joins.
And then Clyde, Timothy, Jimmy- all on one side of Cartman.
Tweek and Craig sit down on the side with Wendy and Stan, Scott as well.
"We know you figured it out, Kyle," Cartman said calmly, tone frigid in a way that makes Kyle feel paralyzed. The hybrid clasps his hands together in front of himself on the table.
"Figured what out?" Kyle snaps back with, trying his hardest to muster the usual snarkiness he has around Cartman. Bute he fails, miserably at that. He just sounds pathetic, grasping at straws if nothing else.
"Don't play dumb," Wendy said, she sounded sharp. She may be tough as nails, and normally Kyle respects that, admires it even, but when it's directed towards him? He gets why people run from Call Girl.
"Why in the cosmos should I tell the likes of you?" Kyle answered with, feebly trying to defend Kenny's privacy.
A privacy that he had already thoroughly breached and ravaged, alongside the unspoken trust they had. He had wrecked it, ruined it, destroyed it- but he could salvage it from the fact Kenny didn't know that Kyle knew.
"You can trust us, Kyle. We're your best friends," Clyde said. And he was right, he was so right.
Kyle's tail snaked itself around the chair leg, "Really guys, I don't know what you're talking about-"
"His secret, Kyle," Cartman said, "Tell us."
"I," He hesitated, "I can't."
"You've already fucked up your relationship with him enough, Kyle. I got Wendy to do a deep dive on your species, and of the few things she could find, she discovered this," Cartman said. He raised a folder, an awful beige and orange hue, and slid it over to Kyle.
The alien hesitantly took it. It was three pages thick, presumably doubled sided. He opened it and skimmed through the headings, he knew every single trait in and out. He paused at the highlighted one, "You're joking."
"This is serious man," Stan said, "We wouldn't just accuse you of imprinting of Kenny without any basis."
"That's stupid. He's my best friend. That's all, that's our dynamic- the kind of dynamic that rakes in loads of cash," Kyle defended with, hoping that pressing on Cartman's one pressure point would make him let up. He slammed the folder shut and slid it back, "Even if I did imprint on him, it would ruin the franchise and never be reciprocated."
"Then tell us what the secret is, you have nothing to lose, no? Just a friend, they come and go on earth," Cartman said. He was calling Kyle's bluff, did he even realize it? He probably did, or if he didn't, he'd snoop until he did.
"Ask Professor Chaos instead, he knows more," Kyle said, trying so, so hard to deflect. The tension pooling everywhere under his skin was agonizing. He needed an out so bad, he needed an escape so, so fucking bad.
Cartman scoffs, "Already done, he said he was sworn to some oath of secrecy, sent us to you."
Kyle stays silent, forcing eye contact with the sleaze in front of the him. The trash eater himself, scraping tactics from the bottom of the barrel.
"Just tell us, no harm will come from it," Cartman said sternly.
"It'll destroy my friendship with Kenny," Kyle snarled out.
"No new harm will come from it, we all know the damage has been done my friend, it's just yet to be discovered," Cartman said, words cutting into Kyle like a knife.
He bites his tongue, Cartman's right, "Give me a week to collect more information on the subject, then I'll report back with the news."
There's a smug and satisfied grin on Cartman's face as he leans back, "See? That wasn't so hard, was now?"
Kyle stands up and pushes away from the table, "I'm going."
"Don't forget about your patrol with Mysterion tomorrow evening, Kite!" Cartman calls out, head leaned back on his chairs backrest.
Kyle's tail is swaying angrily, "Fuck off."
His fangs are grinding against each other as he storms off, if it weren't for the fact he was in suit he would punt the closest chihuahua like a football. Or do something else just as dumb. Maybe kick a fire hydrant and hope it doesn't dent, or punch a tree. Something to make the tense feeling uncoil, to let himself just relax for one second.
He doesn't deserve that though.
He's been uprooting the very foundations of his friendship with Kenny, all because of some morbid curiosity. And Kenny doesn't even fucking know. Kyle is just getting away with it cause he's being awfully slick with how careful he is to put everything back exactly where he found it.
The worst part is how long it's taken for him to feel genuine guilt about it if nothing else. He's such a fucking snake, biting onto his relationship with Kenny and refusing to let go. Sinking fangs deeper and deeper, searching for more even though it's cannibalizing itself. And the first taste is all that it takes to get someone hooked, shame that the thing he got a taste of was metaphorical guts. Kenny just hasn't realized he's stuck in this ouroboros of a relationship.
Despite that, a really twisted and messed up part of him persists in wondering when he'll find the next tape.
-/-/-/-
He finds the next tape almost a week after the interrogation.
Although, we're using the term 'find' rather loosely here. Instead it sort of, fell directly into his lap. And despite knowing better and not wanting to go any further, he still held onto it and didn't let go.
"Thanks for washing my gear man," Kenny said as he stood at the door, Kyle held the bundle of purple fabrics in hand.
He gave a smile, as convincing as he could manage, "No problem man, least I can do."
"See ya tomorrow bro," Kenny said before pivoting on a heel to leave which struck Kyle as odd. The blonde usually loitered for a little bit, chatted casually about whatevers on his head. But none of that came today.
Still, Kyle closed the door and walked down to the luandry room before shaking out the purple. There was that clatter, plastic against unfinished flooring, it was just concrete at the moment. He tossed in the clothing and flipped on the spin cycle with a bit of lavender scented soap. He slid down the front of the washing machine and stared at the tape.
He shouldn't.
He really shouldn't.
He does.
He grips the tape and slams it into the player and hits the play button before he can further question his actions.
I know you're hearing this, Kyle I don't know how long you've been listening to my diary for But it's you It has to be you
Kyle swears his heart stops dead in its tracks. He barely registers that the grit Kenny forces when he's acting out Mysterion has disappeared. That this is just Kenny now.
Who else would be messing with my tapes They're never just right when you put them back You leave scuff marks on the plastic I can fingerprint things, Kyle
I planted this one And log number twelve The rest though? I don't know how many of those you've heard
I'll admit I never meant for number three to fall into your hands I just thought you'd be kind enough to not listen in
. . . How wrong I was
And it's a real shame too You better not have told the rest of the team, Kyle I will make you regret every single breath you've taken if you have
But, that's only if I can get that intel from the gang Do be warned that Cartman is very easy to persuade It won't take me much longer than ten minutes to make him crack
The rest will go even faster Although, I'd give Wendy much longer Craig? He'll be shattering in seven minutes, tops Tweek? Three, maybe four Stan? He trusts me more than you'd expect, he won't even fight
I hope I was right about you being smart, Kyle
Kyle's blood turns to ice.
He is so fucked.
At least he didn't tell Cartman.
You already know my big secret And you have two options, Kyle
Option one: Meet me at Starks Pond tonight to confirm how you feel about the contents of these logs. I'm probably sitting there right now
Option two: Don't. This horrible relationship limbo can remain just like this, on my end I've been stuck here for years
Look, Kyle, what you've done here You're forcing my hand I don't have any other options
Do what you want
I clearly can't stop you
The tape is flung from the cassette player to the other side of the room, it hits the wall and cracks. A thousand regrets pool in the pit of Kyle's stomach and he wants to vomit. He also wants to curl up in a ball and die. Or live in Cartman's basement instead, those are all good options.
But in the same breath...
He's being given a choice when he was sure this whole thing he had with Kenny would simply implode, collapse in on itself and die. He has one chance to make this better than it is. He'll never be able to make this right, but, he can at least try and reinforce the breaking pieces before it's entirely broken.
He picks himself up off the ground and starts on his way up the stairs. He freezes at the door, is he gonna do this? Is he gonna go out to Starks Pond and talk like he should've far too long ago?
Yeah, yeah he fucking is.
The real question is if he's actually gonna say whats been fueling his co-dependency with Kenny for so long.
He isn't sure if he'll manage to fess up to the stupidest biological function he has. He'll try, he'll make an attempt to explain exactly what's been conspiring inside of his head without him even realizing for so many years. He'll at the very least get out a couple words to explain the dumbest thing he's been roped into by his own genetics and unfortunate timing.
-/-/-/-
The ever-present snow and ice crunches under Kyle's boots, but that's the last thing he's focusing on. His eyes are trained ahead of hi as he walks along the edge of Starks Pond. His tail is still, a very rare occurrence.
When he reaches the edge of the pond that Kenny's standing at he's lost his words. The blonde is just staring at him, looking for tells. His hands are stuffed in the pockets of his orange jacket, bright orange, pumpkin orange. Kyle can't focus on anything.
"It worked, you nosy little shit," Kenny said, words weaponized with ease.
"Yeah, it worked," Kyle said. He took a step closer, "I'm sorry," and then another, "For everything really," A third step and Kenny tenses, flinching back just a bit. In turn Kyle steps back.
"For what? Did you tell them?" Kenny asked defensively. He sounded scared more than anything else.
"I know better than that Kenny, they did interrogate me though," Kyle explained stiffly.
Kenny gives a hum, "That gets that problem out of the way."
Kyle nods, "Yeah, that it does."
"So, you listened to three, nine, twelve, and seven, right?" Kenny asked.
"Sorry," Kyle said.
"At least have the decency to dignify me with an answer man, you just fucking ruined me. I had to record that final tape five times before it was good enough to use. I swear to god, normally I'd cut you some slack and now you know why, but not this time," Kenny spat sharply, "So, you listened to those tapes, right?"
"Yep, the four that you listed," Kyle said, his attempt to stay professional just made him sound stiff and disjointed.
This time Kenny faltered before speaking, "And your opinions on them?"
"Positive," Kyle answered with faster than a bullet. His tail flicked as he spoke.
"Anything else?" Kenny asked, desperation heavy on his voice. Thick like molasses.
"I think I imprinted on you- which means something different then it does for the ducks!" Kyle was quick to backtrack on his words, Kenny just looked intrigued, "My species has a 'thats the one' instinct. If we find the right person, it activates, and according to my parents at least, it's usually subliminal. When we landed, I imprinted on you- so, to me, you're the one. And for all I know, unless you die and stay dead, that stupid ass hormonal flux won't go down."
Kenny stayed silent.
"I'm stuck fixating on you until one of us dies, my kind mates for life, and unless I submit myself to experimental science the animal part of my brain is gonna keep screaming that you're mine. Which is kind of annoying, and dumb, and gets in the way- and I didn't even realize it until I found that first tape. I've just been infatuated with you since grade four and I don't know how to make it stop," Kyle spilled, some words meshing together in a blend of syllables. Cyan progressively rose to his face the entire time he spoke. He dropped down to the ground, facing away from Kenny and towards the water, "I'm so fucking sorry Kenny."
Kenny took a few tentative steps closer to where Kyle sat, his tail lay curled around him yet limp on the ground. His ears were drooping a bit and he looked ashamed of himself, a little bit distraught at that. "I'm not gonna disown you, Kyle. That'd just be fucking stupid."
"I didn't mean to ruin your life man, you could've been scoring. God, I probably scared off so many people without even realizing it," Kyle choked out weakly. He pressed his nails into the heel of his palm, "I swear I didn't mean to imprint on you. I swear man- I can try and suppress it."
"It's fine, Kyle," Kenny said as he crouched down beside Kyle. He bumped their shoulders together.
No response.
Okay, that was worrying. It struck a particular chord in the depths of Kenny's chest. One very, very similar to the 'my sister is hurt' chord, which unlocks a specific subset of reactions. Those reactions include:
A: Unbridled violence on whoever caused this B: Giving tried and true advice C: Terrible jokes and playful punches D: Just listening with or without a glass of warm milk
None of those options seem optimal, so Kenny improvises.
"I mean, the whole 'imprint' thing doesn't bother me," Kenny said as he sat down behind Kyle. His knees were bent and he rested his head on Kyle's shoulder.
"Dude I fucking ruined your life," Kyle got out quietly, his tail snapped to punctuate his sentence. It wrapped itself around Kenny's thigh, just above his knee.
"Beg to differ," Kenny said as he slowly raised his hands up. He gently placed them at the base of Kyle's skull, he tensed but didn't move. Kenny slowly rubbed circles in just behind Kyle's ears in the hopes it would calm him down.
Kyle leaned back into Kenny a bit, "I'm so fucking sorry."
"Half of those tapes were me going off about how much I adore you and want you, Kyle. I know you have a brain in there, put it to some use," Kenny said, a small grin on his face as he spoke. He could feel Kyle start to purr, "Just think about it."
Kyle paused for a moment, to just let all of the data sink in. He felt like a total idiot when the conclusion formed in his head, "Oh."
"Yeah," Kenny answered with, "Good thing."
"I'm such a fucking idiot," Kyle said with a laugh on his voice. He squeezed a bit tighter around Kenny's leg, constricting, like a snake, "Can't wait to confirm my families suspicions."
"Do they think we're a thing?" Kenny asked as he combed his fingers through Kyle's hair.
Kyle nodded, "Probably, apparently I've been signalling some very, very vulgar and subtle things to you with my tail for the past six years. I didn't even notice my tail was moving half the time, but it was- mom and dad had to explain that to me which was fun."
"Did you stop?" Kenny asked.
"Naw, definitely not," Kyle answered with smugly, "You never knew anyways."
Kenny gives a hum, "I would say I was giving some vulgar signs myself, but humans don't have a good way to do that discretely."
"I've noticed," Kyle said, "I can read half of you like books with all the tells each of you have."
"Guess Ill have to be even more mysterious so the guys don't catch on," Kenny said as Kyle started to purr, the vibrations rapidly picking up in volume. It felt nice.
"They aren't idiots dude," Kyle said, "They'll catch on soon enough."
"Or we could just walk in there holding hands one day, wait for someone to point it out and go 'yeah we're dating now' and just act like nothing has changed," Kenny said, "Even if we don't go to the movies or eat out at restaurants- that'd be funny."
"We'll see what happens first," Kyle answered with. He holds his breath for a beat, "Love you, Kenny," There's a veritable depth to the words now.
"Love you, Kyle," Kenny answered with the same as he always has, Kyle just never noticed the subtext. He presses a brief kiss to Kyle's forehead.
-/-/-/-
Stan is the first one too notice that Kyle and Kenny are different. A good different though. They're more synced up on the field, better at silent communication, just predicting each other in general. It definitely benefits the team as a whole for the crime-fighting, but whether or not the development is good for the franchise is a whole other story.
He's the first one to ask around about it too.
"Hey Wendy, Kyle and Kenny-"
"Are acting off? I noticed," Wendy said, cutting Stan short with ease. She glanced up from her phone, "I'm already scouring about for details."
"Anything actually come up?" Stan asked.
Wendy shook her head, "Nope, you'd assume that there'd be something; but most searches are coming up dry."
"Worth a shot," Stan said with a sigh.
"You should go ask Craig, he's pretty close to Kenny," Wendy offered up and before she could finish her sentence Stan was looking for Craig.
He was sitting at his desk as usual, cruddy costume and all.
"Craig whats up with Kyle and Kenny?" Stan asked.
And without skipping a beat Craig answered with, "They're homosexuals, Stan."
"What?" Came Stan's dead response, words hollow and in disbelief.
Craig nodded to the aforementioned duo walking in, "Go ask why they're holding hands."
Stan faltered.
"Listen, if you're afraid I'm right you should've asked out Kyle sooner to avoid it," Craig blatantly accused, the words forced the air from Stan's lungs like a sucker punch.
Now aware that Craig is going to keep mentally gut punching him, Stan just heads on off to Kyle and Kenny. They are indeed holding hands, and Kyle's tail is wrapped around Kenny's thigh, just above his knee.
"Look, you two," Stan began with.
"Yeah man, what's up?" Kyle asked, and he's hiding a grin poorly. He's sure that it adds to the confusion Stan is displaying.
Kenny was right.
This is pretty fucking funny.
"How come you guys are holding hands?" Stan asked quietly.
"Kyle imprinted on me," Kenny said bluntly, "We're dating now."
"How long has this been going on for?" Stan asked.
Kyle shrugged, "A month, we were waiting for you guys to notice."
Craig gives a smug, "Told you so!" from his desk.
"Were you guys betting on what was happening?" Kenny asked, an undertone of a snicker to his voice.
"No, even if we did Craig would've won," Stan said spitefully.
Kyle grins a bit, "No need to be sour man, you can still break the news to Cartman, I'm sure it'll be hysterical to see his reaction."
"Dude. Let's go find Cartman," Kenny said eagerly, he was practically vibrating where he stood. Hes grinning that gap tooth grin, "I need to see his reaction right now."
"Wanna tag along?" Kyle asked, holding out a hand to Stan.
He refrained from taking it, "Totally man."
Craig sidles up beside the three of them, "I got a camera to record it."
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pinned post bc why not :)
icon from @/newlayouteveryday | url is a ref to "that's a common woman's name!" from jupiter jazz + rfb1 | blog header from here
hii i just watched this show and i am. Unable to stop thinking about it, hence this sideblog. if i spam reblog or like from your blog and you aren’t a fan of that, please feel free to let me know or block! i’m just somewhat late to the fandom and have been trawling tags and blogs as of late to try and recreate the feeling of being in a tumblr fandom (i love the subreddit but reddit and tumblr fandoms are… so different lol)
please feel free to like this post if you post even kinda regularly about cowboy bebop, i’m struggling to find other blogs who enjoy this show but i know that there’s some of us here! :)
currently going a little insane about julia/elektra (i can’t be the only one on this train…?) but i love pretty much every character and every ship in this show equally! (all of these characters are queer to me in some way, and i really love hearing others’ headcanons about this too.) but since there’s a little less content about them as whole i’m usually a bit more partial to whatever was going between spike julia and vicious… depressed tragic murder polycule for real<3
i’d never normally add anything like this to a pinned post but given how small this fandom is and the fact that i really disagree with harassing people on the internet but especially in fandom spaces where people aren’t here to argue… i wanted to mention that i do like julia, but i completely understand and respect people who don’t! i’m very much a multishipper and think any ships with her are interesting, though i’m a little partial to faye/julia (that car scene was. Not Heterosexual lol). i don’t believe in harassing anyone over their opinions on fictional characters and i’m not in this fandom to argue with people over their opinions or ships… i’m just here to have fun and cry over this show even more lol :’)
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jitterbugjive · 6 months
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I hate that people can easily find the stupid and shitty things I said and did over 5 years ago and jump to the conclusion that that's who I am, and there's no easy way for anyone to see all the efforts I've been making since then to NOT be that person. It's hard to find all my apologies and explanations because I didn't tag them all properly. I've tried time and time again to explain that I was mimicking the behavior bad adults gave me when I was growing up and that no one really called me out on that behavior until it was too late. I've tried to explain that since then I've been going through extensive therapy to separate bad learned behavior from who I want to actually be. There's so much more to this whole story than what one small chunk of the internet is making it out to be. People who actually know me know that this has been eating me up constantly and that I am always living in fear of losing everything to this drama.
especially since some of that info takes quotes out of context, jumps to conclusions that aren't true, or flat out lies about what certain artworks are depicting or meaning to convey (Like claiming a grown ass adult is a child even tho I have proof the character looks totally different as an adult than as a child, or claiming that a shock piece meant to make people reel back in horror was a fetish when it was not at all that)
It takes clips of things without the full picture and puts words in my mouth.
Here's a little something about how I used to talk about sore subjects: I would make a controversial sounding statement, but then I would explain myself in a way that would show the statement wasn't as bad as I was making it out to be. A lot of the time they just take that bad statement and paste it for the world to see, without giving any of that context of me explaining why I said that and why it's not what it sounds like.
I wish people were smart enough to spot cherry picking when they see it, but they just aren't. They'll see one sentence, and someone saying "look they're supporting this bad thing" and that's all they need to think that's what it is. People aren't smart enough to really ask questions and try to understand a situation, all they want is face value to tell them how to think and feel.
People aren't going to bother to listen to me because I'm "the bad guy" and I'll "say anything to cover my ass".
Listen, if I was really that horrible of a person, don't you think there would be more evidence out there that is very clear and blunt and not just making assumptions on what a thing means?
I'm never gonna sit here and say what I said and did wasn't wrong, it was, but it was not done because I was trying to be a terrible person or prey on anyone. It was because I was insanely misguided by someone who groomed me for 5 years since childhood and then abused me for another 3 in a really toxic relationship. And then I never got HELP for it, I never got therapy to cope with it, I never even realized until way later that 'holy shit this person was 7 years older than me and was taking advantage of me the whole time'. Like I knew they were abusive but adults being friends with children was so normalized in my head, and throughout my life many adults or older kids exposed me to things I shouldn't have been and it skewed in my head what was appropriate behavior or not. Or what was okay to draw or not. And a lot of my opinions were formed around this adult who convinced me things like loli/shota were fine as long as they were strictly made up, and he fed me a lot of nonsense about what does and doesn't make a predator to cover his own ass. I was seriously fucked up almost beyond repair for a long time.
I have a warning on my blog now that minors shouldn't be following me, I make it a point to not ever work with minors on projects or talk to a minor in any capacity beyond a fan to artist relationship. I understand now that it is my responsibility as a NSFW artist that I simply cannot have minors as friends. And being much older now I don't even want minors as friends anyway. When I was in my early 20s the age gap didn't feel as bad but I'm definitely feeling it now and I just don't want to deal with minors any more.
I'm not a danger to anyone, I'm not spewing apologetics for horrible people, I've been doing my best to be a much better and more informed person
And I have no easy way to prove any of it in a way that will matter
I'm only talking about this now because once again I was kicked out of something because someone found that old info and that was all it took. No one cares about my side of things.
And I don't know if this will ever go away
I don't know if I'll ever find any amount of comfortable success because I can't get rid of this shit and on the internet it doesn't matter how long ago you did something or how much you've changed, you did it and therefor you're bad forever.
I hate this shit so much.
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isa-ghost · 2 years
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PLEASE REBLOG!
I guess I'm making this post out of desperation. I'm autistic and can't mask to save my fucking life, not intentionally at least. I feel insanely alone about it.
The last few weeks I've had nightmarish amounts of on/off RSD (rejection sensitivity dysphoria for anyone unaware) after irl socializing, which I usually enjoy. I'm incredibly extroverted, sometimes to my own detriment, and I can't figure out if being extroverted is why I can't mask or if I just lack the capacity in some other way.
Really, I'd rather die than not be able to be authentic everywhere I go because I just Am how I am unapologetically, but lately I've really been wishing I could consciously mask and actually stay masking until I'm out of the social situation I want to mask in because I come out of the situation feeling weird or stupid or too "noticeably autistic."
Masking is such a seemingly big staple in autistic conversations and maybe even autistic culture, and I feel like the only one I know who just can't seem to actually mask whether I want to or not.
I want to send this poll around Tumblr to see whether I'm alone, or just a super small minority. And maybe doing so will let other autistics with "abnormal" masking habits feel seen.
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suzyq31 · 7 months
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WIP Tag
Thanks for the tag @nodirectionhome-ao3! I almost feel unworthy as I really am not writing much now and feeling a lot of conflict about how to move forward in fandom, but it's still fun to have a chance to chat about what I am writing (even if it's slow).
List the titles your top five priorities for WIP updates (link your fics for new readers!)
An upcoming scene, event, or detail in each fic that you're looking forward to writing
Bonus: make a poll for your followers to vote on which top 5 WIP they are most excited to see an update on!
Then tag 10 writer friends
Titles
Maybe Tomorrow: The epilogue is all that's left! This is a hard story to categorize, but essentially Harry and Hermione are fixing up Potter Manor the first Christmas after the war, on Christmas Eve they wake up to find themselves seemingly in the future, or some possible alternate reality. Friends to lovers, time travel, domestic fluff and plenty of angst thrown in.
Untitled James and Lily. A one shot sitting in my drafts. Mischief and games, and a first kiss. Possibly going to connect it to At The Beginning.
Found. I've actually pulled this from Ao3 and it's become a personal project instead. It's a spin off from my Seasons Series. Second generation, original character, coming back from the dead and other fun stuff. Harry/Hermione.
Iris. Another project I'm unsure of. It's still online, but may take it down in future to also write for myself instead of an audience. It's the first long story I ever attempted, and was a tad ambitious with it. Harry and Hermione. Hidden child, post war, angsty as hell. And a mystery plot that is slowly driving me insane as I try to weave in the appropriate clues.
Don't really know at this point. @bettertoflee and I have lost steam on In Between which is supposed to be a steamy, fake dating, 8th year Harmony. Life is just hectic and neither of us are feeling overly motivated. I have several vague James and Lily ideas floating in my brain, as well as a few original short stories I'd like to experiment with...but lately writing has been a chore and my creative muse feels depleted!
As you can see the theme is that I have all these Harry and Hermione WIPS, yet no will to work on them, or at least continue posting (sigh). And I would like to write more James and Lily, yet keep freezing. So fun times all around!
Upcoming Scenes, Events, Details
So it's just the epilogue left. One detail is that so far it's only one scene and not very long, but still, I am so excited to finally wrap this up and reveal some stuff. It's probably the story that has meant the most to me on a personal level, and it feels so good to have finished something that I worked hard on and am proud of.
There is a kiss that I am very eager to write. Plus some group dynamics that I'm having fun experimenting with.
Now that I'm not writing this for an audience there has been some freedom with being able to let go of certain details and it feels great to just jump around and have fun with it. I'm working on a scene of a cute "first" date that makes me all fluttery ❤️ Also Ron will be making another appearance soon, and I do love writing him.
There are some cute scenes I'm excited to write, but they are a ways away and I don't want to say too much. I will say there is a kiss that I am also very excited to write in this one to! Let's just see if I ever get through all the "mystery" bits.
Well, if we could summon the energy/ability, there is a smut scene in In Between that I know I'm eager to write, or read, who knows which of us will make it happen 👀 I would also very much like it if my desire to write would come back as I keep getting snippets of Jily banter in my head that would be good to get down.
Not sure if anyone will be interested in reading any of this, but yes a glimpse at the chaos of my writing life (at least fandom wise).
Anyone who wants to participate, consider yourself tagged! But will also add a few that I am curious about! @glitterwitch1 @myst867 @annonymouslyblonde
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justadeadreaper · 7 months
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I have been sent here by another author and I have never been happier to see omegaverse stuff
~🧋
You honestly do not understand how much I love Omegaverse, 🧋. Me and a certain someone (you know who you are but luckily I will not tag you) talk about Omegaverse COD a lot to the point we have our own little AU of them and joke about Omega! Makarov and his breeding kink
Luckily for you and others I will be posting more Omegaverse content as I just love it
At the moment I have got three asks which I am trying to finish as I have been sick and finally have the time to finish them. The first is about Alpha!Reader finding out about Omega!Makarov being pregnant and how excited he is. The second is about Omega!Makarov and his breeding kink with all the insane shit it makes him do. And the third was an ask about Omega!Makarov using his pheromones to keep his Alpha going and I hope the asker is okay with me writing about Omega!Makarov and an Alpha!OC of mine because I read it and immediately thought about something for the two of them especially because I love an overstimulated and submissive Alpha
I am also writing something to celebrate having a 100 followers even if it is a bit late, alongside a very big and long project. It is a post that will have an Omegaverse headcanon for many, many COD characters 
I will be honest when I say you can spam my inbox with anything -especially Omegaverse asks or headcanons because they fuel my day-
It can be general things, like just chatting or asking random things or asking about my AUs or characters in different scenarios, or (my absolute favourite thing) sending in things relating to the Omegaverse. Specific ideas for specific characters and what they would be like in the Omegaverse or just ideas for the Omegaverse as I have so many ideas for it and how it can work
I will write about virtually any character in COD but I prefer MW and the operators from the multiplayer as I know about them more. Old or the Reboot, it does not really matter to me. Although, I do have a preference for Makarov (which is quite obvious), König (again very obvious), Price, Nikto, Nikolai, Captain MacMillan, Captain MacTavish, and Andrei which I know is basic but I have a type 
This is because of a certain someone specifically but I will also write for characters who are not in the COD but have been played by an actor in COD. It will be as if that character is in COD and related to different COD characters. You may have seen others do this but examples are Joe Graves from Six, Sergei from Berlin Station, Xavier from NCIS, etc. 
Also, I have some COD OCs (15 to be precise for the moment, but it also can technically be counting as 16 due to one certain thing) that I do not mind writing about especially for Omegaverse as I have too many ideas. But, like for the above, I will only write about them or answer questions if specifically asked 
All I need is for anyone sending in an ask to be very specific as I am quite dense due to being Autistic and I may not get it or misunderstand if it is not directly said what is wanted, I apologise for that. Just send asks in so I know what people want
Oh! And if you want to be an emoji anon just send in the emoji and I will make a list and tag for you
I hope you have a good day and are feeling well!
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WAIT UR THE ‘demitri and eli take a gay little road trip to find miguel’ GUY?? I LOVE THAT FIC OMG
YES HI I'm That Guy!!! That's my fic!!! Thank you for still noticing and reading it!!! <3 <3 <3
TBH it hasn't been getting a lot of comments or interaction lately, so I wasn't sure if people were still following it or really thinking about it much D: I definitely am going to continue and I have pretty solid plans up through about Chapter 13, but I got caught up in good old Adult Things (got a car part stolen and had to speedrun finding a job, and by some insane miracle I landed a good one???) and had to sorta get my life together for a while. I was also pretty bummed and discouraged that the Elimetri fandom kinda fizzed out after S5, and the hype that was there after S3 and S4 seems few and far between these days </3 And when someone DOES show up and get hyped about my boys, it always seems like they get bored after like 2 weeks and vanish into the ether again D: I feel like an immortal roaming the ruins of a once great and thriving civilization akjsalksufhdulrh
BUT ALL THAT TO SAY this is really encouraging <3 <3 Love that people are still invested, and now that my life has stabilized a bit, I may actually get Chapter 7 done ^^; The canon Mexico plotline was the most underwhelming thing I've ever seen in my entire life (and Season 5 as a whole and I just...did not really Vibe for a lot of reasons), and it's frustrating because like!!! Why would you introduce this grand epic quest for Miguel to find his dad and learn about his Dark Past™️ and then have it be over in 5 minutes and reveal nothing interesting whatsoever about Hector!!! Like if the point was to have Johnny prove he could be a good father figure to Miguel after all and to cause conflict between Miguel and Sam, then there were like...ways to do that without yeeting Miguel to another country with no ultimate character development or narrative payoff :/
And they really expect me to believe Miguel and Robby sat in petty stony silence the whole several-hour drive home and didn't even try to talk through ANY of their issues??? Didn't have ANY road trip bonding whatsoever??? WHAT A FUCKING WASTE. LAME.
ANYWAYS. I know a lot of people were against the Mexico subplot from the jump (mainly because of the potential problematic directions the show could go with it I think), but I might have been in the minority in being excited for it and thinking it had a lot of potential to see a world outside the Valley. Potential which it...did not fill at all. Like at least show us what sketch-ass shit Hector actually DOES!!! My god!!! Also not Robby being like "I wanna make things right with Miguel!!!" and then...clearly not doing that. Like considering their apartment brawl later was the first time Robby has shown onscreen remorse for what he did to Miguel, Robby didn't even apologize in the car ride on the way back??? Or speak a single word to Miguel about the whole, like...Paralysis Incident??? For all Miguel knows, Robby was tagging along just for kicks ajhdsukhfuyh
The whole thing is a mess tbh. I blame rushed production for S5. Deadass thank god for the writer's strike??? Maybe with more time for the writers to actually do their jobs, S6 will give its plotlines some room to breathe.
SO YES, long story short, I wanna do this plot thread some justice and also have my OTP be gay as shit the whole time <3 And give Miguel the epically dangerous adventure of self-discovery he deserves while ultimately still showing him he is very loved and does not need his shitty biological dad!!! God bless!!!
Thank you again for sliding into my inbox about this fic, I am always looking for motivation to keep going with it :D
(For anyone who doesn't know, the first 6 chapters of the fic in question are posted on my AO3, SummerPhlox!)
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buckyismybicycle · 1 year
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late-to-the-party-81 wrote white!reader
I mean, she really didn't.
News flash: this means literally nothing and you’re trying to stir up drama for no reason. I’ve seen your ask on a few blogs now. Why? What’s the matter with you? 
There are so many things wrong with what you’re doing. I implore you to think critically about what you’re saying and what you’re accusing someone of. 
She has never, in the entire time I’ve known her, intentionally hurt someone or tried to exclude anyone. In fact, she is one of the sweetest beings I’ve met in this fandom. She is also one of the few writers I follow who go through extensive lengths to try and write for all audiences which makes this even more insane to me. I’ve read her fics. Have you? Doesn’t sound like it. 
I also beg of thee to remember what tags are ACTUALLY for. Tags are used to ADVISE the audience of what they MAY encounter OR INTERPRET to be part of the story. This is so YOU as the consumer can make your own, informed decision about whether or not you want to read it. Tags do not exist to exclude anyone or target anyone, it is so you are aware of what it contains and choose not to read it if that isn’t your cup of tea. Also, if you’d read the Author’s Note, you would know that the fic itself was a generic reader. 
You want to know what “x white reader” would read like? It would say “he admired her freckles against her pale, moonlight skin while her green eyes stared back at him.” 
You know what’s not “x white reader”? The post that you’re referring to. There was a moodboard made to depict a very specific style of dress, and the model happened to be caucasian. That is likely why it was tagged as white reader, because someone could’ve seen the image and INTERPRETED it that way (refer back to “what tags are for”). 
(1) Did you even try to think through what happened or (2) did you see it yourself or are you trying to create problems? 
Lastly, as a POC that writes x reader, I write what I am comfortable with. As much as I try not to describe the reader too much, I know that there are things that don’t apply to everyone but this is my story. Yes, I get that it’s frustrating to not see yourself represented, which is why I encourage YOU to write what you want to see. That is how we fix the problem of being under-represented.
Communities should be about support and building each other up — talking, discussing issues in a productive manner. Not tearing each other down like this. Anyway, all YOU’RE doing is trying to intentionally hurt someone so maybe think about that instead?
If anyone has a problem about, if anyone wants to talk to me about this further, come off anon and we'll chat.
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canmom · 1 year
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L’Aventure de Canmom à Annecy - Dimanche/Lundi
Bonsoir mes amis!
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I am in Annecy, the unreasonably picturesque home of the Annecy International Animated Film Festival! I have discovered that the Annecy International Animated Film Festival involves a lot more standing in long queues in the hot sun than I expected! Nevertheless, I’m here and making the best of it.
So.
dimanche - le voyage à annecy
First of all, Sunday! I set off at 3am on Sunday morning, taking a bus, followed by two tubes, followed by another bus to the airport. The last bus was late. I met a couple of nice PhD students on their way to the same airport, and they were gonna get all of us an uber, but then the bus showed up after all.
At the airport, security threw away my 200ml bottle of sunblock. Can never be too careful I guess >< Inevitably, Richard Dawkins and his little pot of honey leapt unbidden into my brain. I promise I did not call anyone a “dundridge”.
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The flight itself was uneventful! I was behind three other Annecy-goers, a very sweet gay couple and their friend... we hit it off pretty well but they were on a later bus and I haven’t seen them since I got here ^^’ Once I landed in Geneva I was racing across the city to try to get to the Annecy bus in time (I left myself an hour, which turned out to be way too little time to get through customs, out the airport, onto the train etc.) Trains in Switzerland are nuts, some of them are split across multiple levels and even the ones that aren’t have like, steep steps to get aboard.
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Like “fuck you if you’re in a wheelchair” I guess.
Luckily the bus to Annecy was late! So by midday on Sunday I was in Annecy!
I ran into a group of Swiss animation students who were happy to let me tag along for a while. They just finished their graduation films and they were terribly excited about Spider-Verse. They ended up arranging to meet a couple of animators at Cartoon Saloon so I ended up witnessing some honest to god Networking. The imposter syndrome kicked in about when they were showing the cartoon saloon animators clips from their demo reels. I didn’t even have business cards. Apparently that’s a thing people bring???
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pictured: swiss animation students approaching Lake Annecy.
Anyway my legs got really tired from standing up and no sleep. I bought myself an expensive crêpe and sat down on the floor to eat it. No films were due to start for hours.
I went down to a comic book shop in Bonlieu. French comic book shops are fucking insane. All the books are enormous glossy hardbacks that cost like 50+ euros. I could totally walk away with the complete works of Moebius or Enki Bilal if things like ‘money’ and ‘getting through the airport’ and ‘not reading French’ weren’t factors. But equally there’s so much stuff that I’ve just plain never heard of. I could spend a month in this one shop easy.
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At 3am my hotel checkin opened! Though in French you don’t say ‘check in’, you say j’ai un reservation. By this point I had been awake for more than 24 hours so I decided to go have a nap and eat the falafels I brought with me (very good idea, would recommend having a snack) and wake up for the opening ceremony.
Hotel comments: It’s pretty comfy! Nothing super fancy but I don’t need super fancy. The breakfast is kind of crazy expensive. I had a bit of a scare when it turned out that they hadn’t charged me when I booked the room, and wanted payment now, but thankfully I have a job now so I could take that in stride ^^’
At this point I discovered my plug adapter supports the US, Australia, New Zealand and Japan... but not Europe. Fortunately I had a power bank with me so I could keep my phone alive (its battery is pretty shot) so I resolved to buy a new adapter on Monday.
I woke up shortly before the opening ceremony and quickly concluded that there was no way I was going to be making it down to the opening ceremony and went back to sleep. I slept a really long time. But I think I needed it. Shame to miss the ceremony but odds are I probably wouldn’t have even been able to get in, someone else said she’d queued for two hours.
lundi - les files d'attente 
(lmao is that really the french for ‘queues’? ‘files d’attente’?)
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A beautiful morning in Annecy! I walked over to the supermarché and got myself some pasta ingredients and a ‘veggie dog’ (falafels in a baguette) from a French bakery. I learned just how limited my French vocab is. But it’s a little reassuring to find French people who speak about as much English as I speak French. (Have not yet tried to speak Japanese to any French person but it will probably happen.)
Anyway. Films time, at last!
So the way Annecy works is, you get a certain number of reservations per day depending on your ticket type. If you don’t have a reservation you can optimistically show up at the theatre anyway, and whatever seats they have left go to the line. From the website it sounded like you’d have a pretty good chance to get in.
My friends. That is a lie.
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To get in to a popular non-reserved screening you have to turn up basically hours in advance. Otherwise you arrive at the back of a queue like this, stand in line for a while, and then someone in a red shirt comes out and tells you you’re too late and you go find something else to do.
I have already become very familiar with this particular stretch of ground outside Cinema Pathé. That said, the queues are a good chance to meet people! So I ended up making a couple of connections, mostly with animation students from various places. It turns out a ‘Grand Public’ ticket is a bit of an odd duck.
As you can see in that picture, a lot of people had umbrellas. This is something I neglected, and had to use my bag instead, like so:
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Guess where I got sunburned.
One of those something elses I did was walk into the VR films room. This runs on its own reservation system, with each film having somewhere between 2 and 6 headsets, which get sanitised between viewings. The whole room looks kinda scifi with its cables dangling from the ceiling...
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The only VR film available when I arrived was called Black Hole Museum + Body Browser by Su Wen-Chi from Taiwan. This was very demoscene, with a lot of particles flying around under force fields in a black and white space; the second part involved a dancer who’d been photoscanned somehow and was displayed using waves of particles. It was neat, but I can’t say I was hugely moved? The display device was a Quest 2, but I’m not sure if it was running the particle sim on Quest 2 hardware. If it was, I’m impressed.
The other VR films were all but fully booked so I resolved to come back another day.
I tried to get into the anime film The Tunnel to Summer, the Exit of Goodbyes. Predictably, I was too late. However, the next queue over was for a Spanish film called Inspector Sun and the Curse of the Black Widow, and, wanting to see at least one film I hopped onto that queue and found myself inside the cinema in short order.
The auditorium was packed and I got to witness firsthand such Annecy traditions as throwing paper aeroplanes at the screen, shouting ‘Lapin!’ whenever a rabbit appears onscreen, and making a weird popping sound with your mouth while waiting for the film to start (??? it sounded like frogs ig???). The movie itself was greeted with excitement but honestly? It was pretty eh, which is a shame since the idea of a world of bugs is a fun one! The story concerns a bumbling spider detective, his aspiring sidekick spider, and his feud with the leader of a locust underworld, playing out on a seaplane en route to San Francisco. The characters are all very one-note archetypes, and the dialogue felt like it was trying way too hard to be funny quippy movie dialogue... only to land on the painfully obvious. A big shame.
But what’s worse is that I had spent my one daily reservation on Mars Express by Jérémie Périn at 4:30 and I’d completely lost track of time. By the time I walked out of Inspector Sun my phone was almost dead (see above about the adapter) so I popped into a French electronics store and bought a couple of EU adapters and set off to charge my phone. But then on the bus I thought, hold on a minute, when is Mars Express, I have like an hour right---oh fuck. Well fine it’s at Bonlieu right? I can just walk there? ...it’s at Le Mikado Novel? Where the fuck is that? Half an hour away?
...so to make a long story short I got off the bus, walked down the street, my phone died, there was no way I could find my way to Le Mikado in time to get in even with my reservation, so I had to go back to my hotel and waste my precious reservation. And I hear the film was great. Sob.
There are a bunch of other screenings this week but they’re all packed so who knows if I’ll get to see this movie.
Despite this big oof I charged up my phone and headed back to meet up with my friend (hi to my friend!) who was in the queue for Production I.G.’s new film The Concierge. My friend was more than an hour early, so we thought we had a pretty good chance... lol nope. After standing in line for 45 minutes we were informed the cinema is full and had to leave.
It wasn’t a complete waste though. We met up with another friend and had a little picnic of bagels. Unfortunately the bagel I got was not the bagel I thought I was getting (idk what happened) but even so, it was nice to meet two online friends who by bizarre coincidence both turned out to be from Singapore.
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To close the night I decided to take one more shot at getting in to see a movie, and went for a late showing of The Sacred Cave, a movie from Cameroon. Which is pretty neat, it’s not every day you see a movie from Cameroon. This one was... well, technically it’s definitely rough, but I don’t wanna be hard on it. The story is a fairy tale: a traditional healer is called in to attempt to save a dying king, and he dispatches his son on a mission to retrieve special medicine alongside the Prince.
On the way the son encounters a weird forest wizard, then a princess of a neighbouring clan who’s been turned into an anthro frog by an evil wizard; as he tries to head back with the medicine, he’s captured by said clan and almost executed, but because of his pure nature he alone can draw the special magic sword, and using this power he helps his captors overcome the evil wizard’s raiding party. But on the way home he gets betrayed by the Prince! A whole lot of betraying unfolds, killing off the old seer, and it turns out that our boy is actually the true son of the King. Despite the whole ‘executing his adoptive father on spurious charges’ thing, it all shakes out; the baddies are driven off, the princess unfrogged, and our very special good boy is rewarded.
It’s animated largely in Flash, and it has the feel of an online Flash video. All the same, I believe this is the first feature-length animated film from Cameroon. Bootstrapping an animation industry capable of putting together a coherent film is a hell of a feat, and must take an enormous degree of passion and dedication to make that happen. (Also not to put too fine a point on it but there are certain historical reasons why France has a much more developed animation industry than the country it had colonised until 1971.) Anyway, although principally made in Cameroon, the credits name a whole bunch of different countries, mostly in West Africa. Probably it would make sense to compare it to Princess Iron Fan or something like that, and I’m excited to see what comes down the line. And it was a very sincere movie, the setting presented with a great deal of love, especially when it came to costumes. I’m glad to have seen it.
Tomorrow morning Im gonna get up very early and take another shot at The Concierge, and try and plan better around the queuing system to try to make the best of it and catch more of the short films. It’s definitely not been the day of back to back films I was expecting, but honestly despite all that I’m having a good time just being in Annecy and the week is yet young...
good god is it expensive here though
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Note
what do you like doing in your free time?
why is your name clenched buttocks (I wanna know the reason, pls its so funny lol)
what are things you're good at? (own it babe) (and i don't mean 'babe' in a weird way - just gotta clear that lol)
do you have a best friend?
do you write OG stories and/or fanfics?
one thing you hate about yourself
one thing you love about yourself
do you want a pet? if so, what pet and why
(pls at this rate, its sounding like an interview, so sorry 😂 i'm just...i have a lot of time in my hands and i decided to do this for no particular reason)
fave type of music?
what made you like bsd? and did you always like it? (cause for me, i didnt like it too much at first but it grew on me the second time around)
have you read the bsd light novels and what's your fave light novel if yes?
any pet peeves?
what's your 'ideal' partner (do you have a type like Kunikida or are you fine with anything as long as you're having fun)
Would you rather be single and rich or taken and with a normal salary?
are you happy with where you work/study?
what's your dream career?
what's the app you use the most?
would you rather draw or write?
*** (P.S just pick the ones you want to answer) **
i think im going to look like a weirdo asking so much questions but whatever. at least we dont know each other HAHA i hope you have a good day. <3 and also i love your analyses. just keep posting what you like. i find some of your posts funny lol
good day.
(# you asked and i delivered) (# just me looking for an excuse to use this line) (# cause you said you wanted more questions in your other post TT) (# also ik this isn't a real tag but i wanna be ✨creative) (# fan behavior? idk anymore lmao) okay bye mwa <3
KHJDKJKSAJDGKJSFKG I LOVE THIS I LOVE YOU I WILL BEGIN ANSWERING NOW
i have no free time. I either overwork myself or sleep. however, assuming that i've got a sliver of time to do something, I swap from one obsession to the next <3 rn it's going for insanely long bike rides and turn down every road I feel like until I'm lost,, and going to the gym like an absolute maniac bc i want my arms to be the size of a regular adult's legs
my username is what i desire in life. it is was I strive to be worthy of. it is beauty and life itself, it is the culmination of the universe's most wonderous accomplishments all squished into two raging enormous, gargantuan muscular earth shattering sea trembling ass cheeks 😩😩 (BUT in all seriousness I chose this bc I felt like having tecchousthiccthighs wasn't quite as pleasant??? eheheh buttocks is a funny word)
MY TALENT IS SAYING ANYTHING THAT CROSSES MY MIND TO STRANGERS i've been on this spree lately where I just straight up call anyone pretty when I run into them and HOLY MOLY PPL ARE SO CUTE ABT IT this is your sign to compliment someone today ✨✨ but nah baby i'm good at everything it's a curse ngl (U CAN CALL ME WTV HUN IT'S OK KJKDJFKJS UR SO ADORABLE WHAT)
no best friend bc i can't do commitment and bully friends that get too close to me 😍😍 BUT i'm gonna tag @bellyjellyfish for being my one and only and somehow not hating me thru my unironic "uwu" phase <33
I wrote a 700 page story when I was 12 and it remains unfinished bc I kept rambling and there was no plot 🕴️I love writing but abandon a whole lot of works bc I dream up the rest of the plot and go "oh well why write it now i've been there done that" I DO WRITE FANFICS 👁️👁️ I have a wp account where i wrote a bunch of awful stories and it still stands to this day! (no i will not disclose it don't even try me grr)
I hate how sexy I am 😭😭😭😩😩😩🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵
I love how sexy I am 😳😳😳😳🥶🥶🥶🥶😜😜😜😜
I WANT A TARANTULA I WANT A TARANTULA I WAS A CHILEAN RED KNEE TARANTULA AND I WANT ONE SO BADLY OMFG I've always liked spiders but the ppl I live with would absolutely kick me out if I got one??? once i live on my own i'm def buying two cages so that whenever I have guests, I just put out the empty cage, hide the real one, and be like "oh no what happened to billy my tarantula, he escaped again :(" just to wreak havoc
(HAHA NO IT'S OK I USUALLY DO THIS TO OTHER PPL SO I APPRECIATE U SM LOL SLIDE INTO MY DMS BBG)
fav type of music is classical bc i'm edgy and not like other girls 🤩🤩🤩 something about la campanella just hit so hard when I was like 10 that I have taken it and ran, but I do listen to rnb a lot, never in just one language tho bc sometimes english sucks my d
I liked bsd as soon as I saw ranpo's silhouette in the first episode, I was like "him. I want him 🏃‍♀️" but it was solidified in my head as soon as I saw natsume bc 1) he's hot AF IT'S NOT FAIR I WANT HIM 2) I had been reading his irl works and fell in love, so I started exploring other bsd authors and it introduced me to gogol (i'm so in love with his writing style it's not ok) soooo yeah :)) I started reading bc someone (you know who you are) liked chuuya and I haven't looked back since, tbh it's one of my favs just bc of the characters and their depth
I've read all the light novels I could get my hands on, and I have to say stormbringer FOR THE ONLY, SOLE REASON THAT I AM IN ABSOLUTE LOVE WITH ADAM
pet peeve hmmmm idk??? i'm chill with everything except pickles I hate those mfs, but if I had to chose smth it would be when someone shoves a ship down my throat (it's me i'm bitches go stan satosugu rn)
no ideal partner! I'm aro fyi, but also I feel like I'd be chill with just abt anything?? if u match my energy, we can be partners in chaos and i'll feel understood, and if you don't, I get to learn abt a different kind of lifestyle and get to have someone sane to hold me down (or to corrupt), so either way it's a win. I find culture to be incredibly attractive, speak a language I don't or tell me about a tradition of yours with a wholesome smile and I'd move mountains for you 💖💖 teach me abt something that you're emotionally invested in and an expert, and I'm literally yours <3
haha i don't ever wanna be in a relationship so i'll take being rich,, but honestly it ain't about the money, i'd want to have a normal salary and be taken, but it just ain't my vibe ?? dunno how to explain erm-
dream career is racecar driver YOU TRAVEL ACROSS THE WORLD TO ICONIC DESTINATIONS YOU GET PAID INSANE MONEY AND YOU GO VROOM VROOM VERY FAST WHILE CONSTANTLY ALMOST DYING WHAT ELSE DO I NEED IN LIFE????
app i use most is my local library app bc i'm constantly trying to renew my books that are incredibly close to being overdue 🫡 but nahh i don't use my phone that often it still irks me i'm actually a 60 year old gilf who hates technology and complains abt kids these days
I CAN'T DRAW BUT I ALSO CAN'T WRITE YOU'VE GOT ME AT A DEADLOCK BRO??? if it's which I would rather be GOOD at, i'd say drawing bc imagine thinking abt something and just printing it out on paper??? yall fr got some magical talent omg
WHAT IF WE DO KNOW EACH OTHER THO??? WHAT IF WE'RE ACTUALLY NEIGHBORS??? CHILDHOOD FRIENDS??? YOU NEVER KNOW AND YOU PROBABLY NEVER WILL MUAHAHAHAHA i'm gonna stop now but ty for all your questions and have a wonderful day, darling <33
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murderous-spaten · 8 months
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got tagged by @the-thorster thank you💜
1. Are you named after anyone?
yes and no. my first name no. one after a musician and another one after an object in a book (tho it is a people name. thats just how my parents discovered it)
2. When was the last time you cried?
had a full mental breakdown yesterday evening. fun. will probably do it again today.
3. Do you have kids?
no
4. What sports do you play/ have you played?
rode horses, danced ballet, hip hop and modern jazz, played batminton. currently kind of bouldering but i havent been in a while bc i broke something in my foot.
5. Do you use sarcasm?
no. never.
6. What is the first thing you notice about people?
i dont know? i try to remember their name and face bc i am somewhat faceblind.
7. What's your eye color?
brown.
8. Scary movies or happy endings?
hate scary movies so happy endings it is. i am just way too jumpy for being scared tbh. and body horror makes me throw up soo the choice is easy.
9. Any talents?
my jaw clicks when i chew? does that count?
10. Where were you born?
the radio station named after the city calls it "die schönste stadt der welt" and has a bit about the amount of bridges.
11. What are your hobbies?
i like doing crochet and knit. also going insane over the blorbos.
12. Do you have any pets?
no. my family used to have rabbits. would love a cat someday.
13. How tall are you?
1,73cm
14. Favorite subject in school?
depends on the year and teacher. history almost always. english was a late love.
15. Dream job?
would love to sit in an archive or museum somewhere and just catalogue stuff. it gives me a sense of purpose that makes it easier to get up in the morning.
tagging @sunlighnes @willex-molina @fallforashootingstar @muidipel and anyone else i probably forgot and wants to do it😊
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do you have any hypno writers you really like? either for TSS or just in general. your writing is great so I feel like you'd have good taste in recs
- 👽
first off, 🥺 that's really sweet thank you
second off, i don't think im going to have a very good answer for you. legitimately, i used to trawl the nsfs/nsfw tags the most,,, back in about 2019?? and the landscape of who's writing and how much is being written has changed a surprising amount, and I can't remember for the life of me who i used to read.
the sanders stuff? fuck dude i dont remember anyone other than @/tulipanthousa in specific, but i remember reading good stuff. God. i remember tss kinktober 2019 was really good but i cannot rely on tumblr ever being able to take me back that far.
when it comes to just hypnokink blogs? again a lot of the stuff i initially microdosed on is actually gone (i joined tumblr first for porn but also like,,,, ten months before the porn ban)
But i am still gonna list a whole bunch of blogs i find inspiring / hot. tho tbh you might have guessed some of these already based on my rb history
(im also not tagging ANYONE bc im just some rando fandom smut blog and that'd be mortifying >.<)
@/of-mutts-and-men just hits that monsterfucker vibe perfectly. a lot of werewolf vibes and ive been so into that lately. also a healthy dose of mind-fuckery.
@/aspiring-house-husband has really good hypno story posts (and non hypno) but just. clenches fist. the eroticism is off the charts. their posts are So inspiring. and so fucking hot. drives me crazy insane.
@/erogenousmind also is top notch and im pretty sure, from memory, has some really good hypno scripts? im picky w/ scripts, i dont like ones that try bait you into reblogging at the end >.< and a lot of them dont necessarily pace well, but i remember this person's stuff being Good
@/yoyomindloops is v much the same as above. they have that erotic hypno dnd series. good shit.
and tho im p sure theyre not on tumblr anymore actively, the blog is still up, and @/lewd-zko's art is just. such internet hypnokink classic.
im also gonna cite 2 like,,, 'makes hypno porn video content' things that i find really inspiring/hot too (tho i will admit, ive never bought their things, i dont exactly have the privacy to do so nor the funds)
@/the-hedge-hypnotist was a guy i remember has been around for ages and has been like,,, solidly one of the Ethical Hypno Content Guys? there's been... a fair amount of drama over the years, it seems, but yeah. he always super cites the models he works with and even the teasers for what they make is super top notch and really erotic. i remember one i was obsessed w/ was super eldritch horror... and i didnt even think i was into that
and lastly, a site that's been driving me insane and im actually gonna link it directly, is Mesmerotic. their people are hot, theyre hypno is hot and real and genuine, and even tho like,,, i can't buy their stuff yet, their teasers/snippets are insanely good. and they do some versatile things!
the other major idea spinner, other than my own brain, is actually DM's with a bestie ^-^' it's no more than plotting erotic fics together (it's actually for a different fandom, i reuse the ideas and she doesn't mind) but got ae have some good kinky ideas. the superhero stuff? that was aem.
...i dont know if this is quite what you meant, but... yeah! fdkgjfdg
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void-and-virtue · 1 year
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First off, thank you for tagging me @moondal514 . This looks fun! It’s insane to me that anyone would consider me a mutual but I’m happy about it sksksks
currently reading: Nothing in particular? There’s a bunch of books I want to read but my brain is SO not on board with me branching out in the book direction rn. I did finally cave and read Son Nefes in full yesterday, even if that is only book-adjacent (It’s really good. If you’re an AFTG fan and haven’t read it, you should. Even if you technically already know all it says from various posts floating around).
Fic wise, it’s whatever @jtl-fics has going on with Fluent Freshman. It’s just prime comedy complete with memes, 11/10.
favorite color: Midnight Blue. I will sing my love for it from the rooftops.
last song: Take Me Back To Eden by Sleep Token. I’m frothing at the mouth about the entire album, but the title song in particular is rotating in my mind like a rotisserie chicken.
last show: I haven’t watched anything in so long I literally can’t remember. @statistical-improbabilities my beloved is trying to bully me into Shadow and Bone and The Good Place and I’ve had my eye on The Legend Of Vox Machina since it came out so my next pick is most likely gonna be one of those.
currently watching: YouTube. If anything, it’s YouTube. I cycle through video essays, Hollow Knight content, Critical Role VODs and the YouTube channel of the animal guy from TikTok like nobody’s business
last movie: Probably my nth rewatch of Howl’s Moving Castle about a year ago (oh god, what is time?) I really wanna go see Across The Spiderverse—the first movie was SO GOOD. Also, Everything Everywhere All At Once when I get around to it (can you tell how I’m always late to trends?)
sweet/spicy/savory: People here expect me to CHOOSE??
currently working on: My beloved monster child of a WIP that is shaping up to be absolutely MASSIVE. It’s an Andreil soulmate AU with telepathy because I am forever true to my brand of ‘what does it do to a person if they have mental superpowers, would that be fucked up or what?’. I passed 110k on this yesterday. It’s still potentially less than half the story. Save me.
current obsession: Take Me Back To Eden by Sleep Token. Ooooh my god. I started listening into this album a couple days ago but sat down today to listen to the entire thing in its proper intended order and. I have ascended into a whole other plane of existence. I am experiencing emotions in colors previously only known to mantis shrimp. I can see my Spotify Wrapped of this year going completely down the drain as this album becomes the only thing I listen to for the entire rest of the year, on repeat. I wish this was an exaggeration. I am dead serious. Sorry to my friends on discord who will be subjected to my lethal case of Not Shutting The Fuck Up About It for the next while <3
6 mutuals: I have no idea at which point following a blog makes that person become a mutual. All I know is that @statistical-improbabilities @i-think-i-lost-my-phone and @swamp-world are legally obliged to put up with my bullshit. @dumbenby I’m roping you into this too <3
Anyone who sees this and feels like doing it (or sees it and wonders why the hell I didn’t tag them because we’re obviously mutuals (I’m sorry)), feel free to take this as your invitation to go ahead and/or yell at me <3
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h0rr0rsaxo · 1 year
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I have come for some hurt and comfort!
So Flynn is starting to steadily become more prominent in Anni's life. He does so by stopping by and checking on her, helping her with her anxiety, driving her home when she's drunk, and taking her out during the day to go do things. But Anni doesn't like it lol- But lets say one night, Flynn drives her home from a bar and the entire time Anni won't talk to him and is just being super cold. As soon as they get to her apartment he follows her inside and she gets angry at him.
"Why are you still here? Just leave me alone!" and she's just trying to push him away but Flynn is just patient and sweet and it throws Anni off even more. Then she suddenly breaks down and is a drunk, crying mess. She talks about how she doesn't want anyone's help, how she's "fine" and she even asks him why he's helping her. You can choose how he responds but after that Anni finally gives up and kinda just hugs him.
(Feel free to decline this...its like 2am right now so I am probably not gonna remember much of this lmao, but feel free to change or add anything as always and if you need ideas for requests with Fang, then I can help! Anyways tysm!!)
[ Feather-light touches. || RE simp party. ]
Warnings: None!
Tags: @insane-horror-movie-addict
A/N: omfg...angst and comfort...yes.
Word count: 2,085
Anni had been having a rough time lately, with her anxiety getting the better of her and the stress of her job weighing her down. Enter Flynn, a monotone yet caring guy who had slowly but surely become a significant presence in her life. He would often check in on her, help her through her anxiety, and even drive her home when she'd had too much to drink. Despite his genuine intentions, Anni couldn't help but feel annoyed by his constant presence.
One night, after a particularly long day at work, Anni decided to go out for drinks with her friends. She barely noticed Flynn sitting at the other end of the bar, keeping a watchful eye on her. As the night wore on and her friends began to trickle away, Anni found herself increasingly intoxicated.
Flynn, ever the gentleman, decided to step in and offer her a ride home. Anni begrudgingly accepted, avoiding eye contact and giving him the cold shoulder.
Flynn's car rumbled along the dark, nearly deserted streets as he drove Anni home from the bar. The streetlights cast a dim, hazy glow on the car's interior, illuminating their faces just enough to catch each other's expressions. Anni sat with her arms crossed, shifting uncomfortably in the smooth leather seat, her irritation boiling beneath the surface. Flynn, on the other hand, seemed unfazed by her mood, his stoic expression never wavering.
"Hey, you hungry?" Flynn asked in his usual monotone voice. "I know a fast food place that should still be open." Anni rolled her eyes, keeping her eyes on the road. Flynn shrugged and continued driving, the silence in the car only broken by the low hum of the engine. The dark silhouettes of buildings and trees passed by, their shadows dancing across the car windows as they drove through the night.
Anni huffed, annoyed by his nonchalance. "Don't you have, I don't know, criminal work to do or something?" she finally spoke, her voice dripping with sarcasm.
Flynn glanced at her briefly before returning his focus to the road. "I took the night off for you," he said flatly.
Anni clenched her jaw, her irritation growing. The idea of Flynn getting too close to her, the thought of anyone getting too close, was unbearable. In her life, it seemed like everyone who got close to her ended up hurt or worse. She didn't need another person's life on her conscience.
"Well, don't do me any favors," she snapped, turning her gaze to the window. The streets outside were lined with closed shops and empty sidewalks, a stark contrast to the lively atmosphere they'd left behind at the bar.
Flynn said nothing, simply continuing to drive. For the rest of the ride, Anni remained silent, giving him the cold shoulder. The car continued to glide through the night, passing under streetlights that cast an eerie glow on the deserted cityscape. Finally, they pulled up to her apartment building, the end of the tense, uncomfortable journey.
Flynn had always been the stoic type, not one to show much emotion. But he still cared for Anni— this fact was evident since he had just driven Anni home from the bar after she'd had a few too many drinks for her own good. As they approached her apartment, Anni stumbled a bit, clearly struggling to find her footing.
"Here, let me help you," Flynn offered, reaching out to steady her.
Anni, however, was having none of it. She shoved him off angrily. "I don't need your help!" she snapped. Flynn simply sighed, maintaining his stoic expression. He continued to follow her, making sure she made it safely to her apartment. As they entered, Anni seemed to grow even more irritated by his presence. Her eyes narrowed into a glare, and her fists clenched at her sides.
"Why are you still here? Just leave me alone!" she shouted, the anger in her voice palpable.
Flynn, patient and unflappable as ever, calmly replied, "I'm here just in case you throw up. I want to make sure you're okay."
Anni's anger seemed to reach a boiling point. "I don't need you to babysit me! I can take care of myself just fine!" she yelled, her face flushed with frustration. He simply nodded, brushing a strand of hair out of face, and letting it fall behind her ear— the subtle gesture was sweet and affectionate. Suddenly, her expression changed. The anger gave way to confusion, and she looked up at Flynn with wide, bewildered eyes. Her breathing grew rapid, and she began to hyperventilate. Anni's hands flew to her hair, tugging at the strands as if trying to anchor herself to reality.
Tears began to stream down her face as she continued to yell, her voice raw and broken. "Why can't you just leave me alone?! I don't need your help, and I don't need anyone's fucking help! I can handle my own life, alright?!"
Flynn's stoic demeanor cracked ever so slightly as he saw Anni's pain. He approached her slowly, his voice gentle and soothing. "Anni, I know you're strong. I just want to be here for you, to support you when you need it." Anni's sobs grew louder, her body shaking with the force of her emotions. It was clear that her anger had been masking a deep, overwhelming pain. Flynn stayed with her, offering her the support she so desperately needed, even if she couldn't admit it herself.
Flynn's calm and patient demeanor only seemed to make Anni angrier. But as her emotions got the better of her, she suddenly found herself breaking down, tears streaming down her face. With slurred words, she vented her feelings, insisting she was "fine" and didn't need anyone's help.
Flynn looked at her with kind eyes and said, "Anni, I'm here because I care about you. You don't have to face everything alone. It's okay to lean on others sometimes, and I want to be there for you when you need someone."
Anni's tears continued to flow, her body wracked with sobs. Unable to contain her emotions any longer, she crumbled to the ground, falling onto her knees. Her hands desperately tried to wipe away the tears streaming down her cheeks, but it was a futile effort. Her voice cracked as she stammered, hiccuping between sobs to ask Flynn, "Why? Why do you care about me? Why are you trying to help me?"
Despite her tearful outburst, Flynn's eyes remained locked on Anni's. The intensity of his gaze was unwavering, even as she sobbed loudly. The vulnerability in her teary eyes was evident, and Flynn felt a tidal wave of emotions wash over him.
Slowly, he slid his hand up to Anni's face, his thumbs gently wiping the tears from her eyes. She weakly grabbed his wrist, not intending to stop him but secretly wanting him to continue. Flynn understood the unspoken request, and with the utmost tenderness, he pushed her softly onto the ground. He leaned down and kissed her cheeks, and then her eyes, as if trying to chase away the tears with his gentle touch.
Before pulling away, Flynn rubbed his thumb on her cheek and, with a deep sincerity in his voice, confessed, "I do this because I love you, Anni." He paused for a moment, searching for the right words before continuing, "I used to be like you, you know. Hating the world, hating my job, drowning in self-hatred."
Anni's eyes widened in surprise, her face a mixture of shock and bewilderment. She hesitated for a moment before sitting up, her face finding solace against Flynn's chest. He welcomed the embrace, his hand finding its way to her hair. He began to pet her gently, threading his fingers through her locks and planting a soft kiss on her hair.
As they sat there, Anni began to feel the warmth of Flynn's love, a feeling that was both comforting and unfamiliar. And for the first time in what felt like an eternity, Anni allowed herself to believe that maybe, just maybe, she was worthy of love and care.
With heavy grunts and labored breaths from Anni, Flynn picked her up and led him to a nearby couch where she all but collapsed, face squished like a child’s into the cushiony pillows. Flynn snorted halfheartedly; Annu was always a sleepy drunk, but the light in her eyes told him that her mind was desperately fighting against the urge to slip into that comfortable, dark oblivion of sleep.
Just as his legs moved to shut the front door, the warmth of her hand encircled his wrist and halted his movements. “Stay…” she slurred as she shifted her face outwards from the soft fabric of the pillow to peer up at him with pleading, auburn eyes that glimmered with an unknowing emotion and flickered the colors of fireworks illuminated by the crackling fireplace. Flynn's heart twisted and turned in the cavity of his chest at her words and he felt compelled to melt under her gaze.
“I'm just going to close the door and get you something to drink, I'll be right back.” Flynn cooed just above a whisper and did his damndest to ignore the muffled whine she let out as her fingers left the softness of his wrist.
After shutting the front door and pouring some crisp, cool water into a tall glass, he found himself crouched in front of her drowsy face, eyes still persistently open despite the obvious dark circles that hung from her beautiful eyes and the fan of alcohol on her breath.
The glass hovered in front of her face momentarily before she understood the silent cue and pushed herself up on wobbly arms away from the warmth of the couch.
“Careful—” he warns, rushing to support her body with his strength just as she was about to plummet back down into the fabric of the couch. With his help, he manages to get Anni sitting upright and held the glass to her chapped lips, ushering her with gentle childes to take careful sips. Despite not having touched her in so long because of his busy-job— his hand moved instinctively to rub gentle circles along the small of her back as the water ran down her throat in rivers.
The silence that had once been lingering now remained a threat in her ears that pounded and vibrated with every one of her shaky breaths. Anni's heart caught itself somewhere along the thin line of her throat as he fully processed that Flynn was still here— and he wasn't leaving anytime soon.
A sparking sensation erupted from the spot in her hair where his fingers had been and sent tingles throughout her body. Though her mind had wandered on late nights, it never truly hit: how much she missed him when he was gone. His warm gaze doused in sugar, his kind touch and gentle words, and the soft feel of his lips on hers.
“ ’m sorry…for pushin’ you away…not…being there…for…you.” Anni's choked words were hardly a resemblance of the woman who seemed so devoid of emotion.
“We can talk about this in the morning, okay?” Flynn hummed. He cradled her words like a newborn baby; her actions truly weren’t alright in her mind and yet he so warmly opened his arms to her despite all she’d done to him.
“come on,” Flynn smiled and dragged his fingertip against the back of her watered eyes, “Let’s get you more comfortable.” He rose from the couch and crouched in front of her to rid her of her boots in an attempt to get hee more comfortable. But her tears seemed to be ceaseless and his gentle, feather light touch brought to light how ungrateful, neglectful, emotionless she’d been. With each boot he removed, another memory of her sullen face contrasted with her beautiful smile would pop into his head and he’d find himself at a loss for words. His hands shed her of his thick coat and slid the tight clothing from off of her torso.
Through bleary eyes masked with salty tears, she stared at him. Flynn fingers wrapped around the charcoal, hairtie in hier hair and with only a very light tug, her auburn locks came undone and fell in waterfalls upon her shoulder and in front of her flushed face. Her hair still felt as soft and downy as the underbelly of a baby bird; bouncy and fluffy, he was met with little resistance when his fingers carded through her locks.
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