#this post is technically shady yes but only because I needed to explain how I thought about the song

[softpastelqueer]

You’re so vain, you probably think this post is about you, don’t you? Don’t you?

[popculturebuffet]

Amphiba: True Colors Review or FINALLY THE  FINALE

We’re finally here all you happy people! Ten Months, 36 episodes, 20 half hours, a lot of gay subtext, a lot of bloodshed, and a lot of build up have lead us all here! One absolutely STUFFED finale: A trust is betrayed, a rebllion is had, a conquerer rises and NOTHING will ever be the same.. and yes htat’s thrown around a lot but this is one of those times where NOTHING WILL BE THE SAME. This is that kind of finale folks. 

But before I can get into all the juicy stuff you’ve been waiting for there’s a few things to discuss.. and the first is obviously the fact we had to wait three goddamn extra weeks to get here after spending all season leading up to this. 

You all know the story by now. Hell I even angirly ranted about it when it happened and rightfully so. But frankly the colossal delay is going to be such an integral and permeant part of this episode and this show’s history that not talking about it in this review would do it a diservice: So to recap: The finale was posted to air  May 1st, a weak after “The Dinner/Battle of the Bands”. I had it set in my schedule, it showed up in that month’s press release of Disney Channel Episodes, We were all ready to go with all the tight and intense build up leading up to this. 

Then the worst happened and Disney aburbtly, and with a funny face image trying to play it off as a joke annoucned via it’s animation twitter the episode would be delayed. Now in fairness to the twitter person there, they were PROBABLY trying to help massage a blow... but seriously dude, read the room next time.  Thankfully creator Matt Braly stepped in and explained it was technical delays. After what happened the next day I ASSUMED he was just trying to cover for them as it would turn out the episode was finished.. turns out, and I had to edit the review to reflect this the truth was somewhere in the middle. Edits were more discussed, likely due to the episodes very violent nature, and the episode was given a content warning. Given what happens.. I can’t blame Disney for wanting one or for thinking of editing it.. but canblamehtem for the “Things that could’ve been brought to my attention YESTERDAY’ nature of the edist and the insuing delay. 

I can also blame them for leaking the episode on ITUNES. Yeah if they were REALLY concenred abotu content then they would’ve held off longer and not brought this up five minutes before it aired, delaying the episode for many. Hell I DEFENEDED them in the original version of this, but they had MONTHS of this episode being in production to fucking say something. WHy do this five mintues before it’s finished? 

It just smacks of laziness and overly panicy stuff. A content warning would’ve been FINE. You ahve it for racisim on Disney Plus, just put one here and call it a day. You haven’t objected to the horrifying content in the series up to this point why start NOW.  And they STILL never apologized. For any of this. For the leak, for the delay, never properly explaining the delay (Matt didn’t either.. but given how twitchy comapnies can be about what their creators say, I can’t blame him for not wanting to clarify it was a post credit’s thing till closer to airtime), just in general not giving a shit abotu the kids or adults watching this. Just because kids watch thiis dosen’t me older kids don’t have social media, and it dosen’t mean teens don’t. If you want to pretend us adults watching this don’t exist.. fine. It sucks but I can’t do anything. But do not do this shit to kids and then not go to them. And again Matt could’ve.. but it’s not his fucking job. His job is to make a show, help make sure it gets to air and be a sweeheart. YOURS is to make sure things run smoothly and when their is a hickup,get your house in order. 

Matt shoudln’t of HAD to beg people not to watch it. Various va’s for the show shoudln’t of HAD to record funny messages.. it was appricated but it’s not thier job to prevent this from spreading. It’s yours. It’s yours to open your damn eyes and see adults and older teens watch this stuff too and to head that shit off. This incident is going to stick in my craw for god knows how long and ALMOST convinced me not to cover Owl House weekly (I still woud’ve likely done a review on each half of the season). I ended up renegeing on that and will be starting regular coverage of that in June and continuing coverage of this show whenever it returns.. but it was close. 

And it’s ultimately YOU GUYS that kept me hanging in there. It was thanks to a Disney show this blog exists in the first place, and contiunes to get the bulk of it’s viewers. It’s how I got my patreon, biggest fan and bfinacial backer Kev. I’ts why I can do what I love, talking about and analyzing stuff I enjoy and ocasionally loathe. You guys came back week after week for my ducktales reviews and stayed for Amphibia. I”m sure i’ll get even more for Owl House. It’s thanks to all of you I can keep going despite the hardships, the lack of patreons, the long nights, the weird sleep schedules. I wouldn’t of made it through 20 weeks of awesome tv without you. So for you, and for myself, i’ll hang in there but I expect better Disney. And i’m damn well gonna get it. So join me under the cut as the world turns upside down.. and there are a LOT of spoilers. Seriously if you want to wait for the tv airing do not go under the cut

So we open with a flashback to 8 months ago, the day all this began: Marcy was working in the library on her cram classes, getting texts from both Sasha, who was excited about Anne’s birthday, and her own father who wants her to come home right away as there’s something important they need to discuss. 

But before she can a book about the strange and what not naturally slips out and Mar-Mar can’t help but thumb through it.. and as you were no doubt dreading.. finds the box which is said in a large tv friendly caption to lead to other worlds. 

Naturally Marcie is intrigued and snaps a pick and heads home... and we cut to the END of that conversation as she tearfully runs out of the house , refusing to accept what they’ve told her and her dad coming off hella unsympathetic with his overly harsh tone, especially since we DO find out what he told her... and it’s a lot to put on her and a lot to just say “accept because I helped make you for all of two unsatisfying minutes. “ 

So while running away she passes the box.. and sets the events from both the show’s opening and the flashback from the last finale in motion. Marcy sent them here on purpose.

Yeah needless to say I DIDN’T see this coming. And it seems obvious in hindsight: Marcy being the one most desperate to keep thier friendship together, as we’ll see at it’s worst through this episode, her barely mentioning going home, and most tellingly the only things she talks about from earth were Anne, Sasha and her dorky intrests. All the things closest to the heart and that she’s most likely to make out with.. but while Anne brings up earth stuff every so often even after getting more screen time in Season 2b... Marcy NEVER talks about that kind of stuff. She has her girlfriends and a real life fantasy novel right here... but she DOSEN’T miss her parents or earth itself. And given her life was already shown to be as an outcast with only two people carring about her, three with her mom now we know, who never REALLY fit in and whose on friends very clearly didn’t share her intrests.. it probably made it all the more tempting: a real adventure, an escape from her problems, and a way to start over: become who she always PLAYED and not who she was. Everything just.. snaps into place with this revelation and makes Marcy an all the more heartbreaking character... even more so soon enough when we find out what her overall plan was. 

But that’s half an episode away: for now our party returns on Joe to Newtopia.. though clumsly. Marcy admits that they probably can’t fit more people on him. But with this our heroes are ready to finish this story and with a plan since obviously they can’t just walk into town with two wanted crminals: Marcy will present the box and THEN sasha and grime, who will cloak themselves to avoid attracting attentions, with literal cloaks Marcy hasn’t made a cloaking device yet, so hopefully they’ll get a pardon. 

Inside Sprig and Anne talk, with Sprig admitnig he’s sad this is the last adventure.. but Anne has hope. After all they have a way home now and that portal goes both ways. She can hop back any time and vice versa. This sin’t goodbye.. it’s just goodbye for now. And i’ts something I genuinely didn’t think of.. and not just because Andrias’ shady actions and Sasha and Grime’s machinations meant this was NEVER going to end well. 

Speaking of Sasha and Grime’s machinations those come to a head: As our heroes enter the castle, greeted by Lady Olivia, and we get our typical end of the RPG speech from the “Good” king.... Sasha swipes the box and Grime uses the hammer to knock everyone off ballance. The coup the two have been cooking up has come to pass. 

Anne and Marcy’s reactions.. are telling: Anne is utterly pissed at the betryal and done with Sasha and Marcy is begging both sides to stop as this was not how it was supposed to end. Sasha tries to use a box as a baranging chip, and plans to destroy it if Andrias dosen’t surrender despite destroying her way home. Given it’s implied her home life isn’t great either and she gets to rule an empire instead of a school, it’s easy to see why. 

Grime stops him from calling her bluff though by wacking him in the shins and then hodling him at hammer point to get the military of Newtopia to stand down while his covert Toad agents reveal themselves and runamuck. Grime has won. 

Anne meanwhile is livid, with Sasha not quite getting why MAYBE Anne would once again feel betrayed that once again Sasha is trying to do everything her way and once again lied to her and harmed innocent people. Anne breaks off their friendship which deeply uspets Marcy.. who weirldy. ISN’T trying to talk Sasha out of this. After all she gets what she wanted anyway. She IS upset when Sasha tries to send them home for defiance.. but the box dosen’t work for her and she simply has the guards escort our heroes and Olivia out till she can figure this out. 

Naturally though Anne, being pissed, heartbroken and pissed, and yes that was indeed intentional, HEADBUTTS the nearest guard and breaks them out, with the planatrs starting to fight back. Their still outnumbered.. but help arrives 

Or rather the Amphibia equilvent as both wolverines are busy with prep for the Hellfire Gala. Yes it’s General Yunan, who Lady Olivia cuts off probably not for the first time. Your lucky that’s one of her turn on’s lady.

So our heroes sneak out and head to Sals, while the Toads wreck up the town. Marcy... is of course desperate to fix things, but figures it’s easy. All they have to do is free the king, stop the rest of the army from arriving, their an hour away, and cementing grime’s foothold, get her girlfriends to reconcile and fix the inherent power imbalance so a rebellion doesn’t’ happen again. 

But Anne rouses them: They may be a goofus, a quick witted kid, an out of touch old man, a literal baby, am etaphorical baby, and a nerd.. but their a BADASS Goofus, kid, old man, babies and nerd... and two other ladies the toads actually know and respect. They’ve fought worse: Canibals, princess bride references, theater bandits, chicken elder gods, Poly’s addiction to angry mobs and paste pot pete and come back stronger each time. They can do this. They might only be 8 strangers, but together they can fuck up this shit. or to have a previously mentioned buddy of mine sum it up

So with that it’s time to split up gang: Marcy, Hop Pop and Olivia will go free the king using Hop Pop’s acting skills...which actually works despite Olvia’s doubts. Polly, Yunan and Frobo will put the hammer down and give them hell, taking out the toads in the city and drawing all of them away from the gate where Spriganne will trigger it thus saving the day. 

Meanwhile Sasha is feeling discontent. She got everything she wanted.. but she didn’t think about what to DO with all that power. At home she could do all sorts of things ruling a school but now she’s lost one of the loves of her life. Without Anne and Marcy i’ts just empty. Even Grime’s utterly heartfelt gift of an emerald sword, he knew she always wanted to duel wield that has a heron on it, a sign of how they met and a truly sweet gesture can’t cheer her up. So Grime suggests redecorating and the first thing to go is a sappy mural of Andrias and his subjects. What they find UNDER it though is horrifying.. and i’ts surprisingly not a bunch of spiders like you’d expect.. but a mural of Andrius as some sort of horrible king with an army of robot frogs like Frobo, with a LOT of frog, toad and newt skeletons piled up. Sasha and Grime are glad they dodged that bullet.. only to find Anne scaling the tower with Sprig, the two naturally going to stop them.

 The two try and turn the wheel, but can’t as there’s a doorstop... one they DEFINTELY saw earlier when looking out the window of Sal’s.

Regardless they send Polly for that.. and the rematch begins. Sasha TRIES talking to Anne.. but given she stabbed her in the back AGAIN for incredbly petty reasons, that’s not going to work and the two get one hell of a fight. Beautifully animated and rife with emotion as the two clash with Sasha DESPERATLY trying to get Anne to stop for a second and listen and Anne rightly refusing, while we watching know our hero winning will spell DOOM for this world despite her trying to do the right thing. Anna and Brenda’s acting here is just TOP notch. In any other episode this would be the best part of it.. but we’re only getting warmed up.

While they fight, we get a surprising and awesome bout I did not see coming: Sprig Vs Grime. And it gives me Spider-Man vs Kingpin vibes really: A rotund but still far more powerful opponent versus a smaller but quicker one. And that’s how even more shockingly, Sprig comes out the WINNER. While Grime has the hammer and more strength and skill... Sprig has speed and thus gets Grime to whack himself with it. Granted he can’t use the thing and comically spins around afterword.. but it proves Grime’s racist thoughts about frogs wrong and leaves Anne free to turn the wheel once she beats Sasha. The invasion is thwarted.

But naturally given the ooky spooky mural and the other hints of ominous shit like the watcher with a thousand eyes, this isn’t the end. Back at the throne room, with Sasha and Grime as prisoners Anne gives Andrias the box despite sasha begging her not to. But rather than send her home right away.. he has a history lesson for her first. And nothing good ever starts with someone delaying helping you to give a sinister history lesson let me tell you.

We find out the while truth: Amphibia was once a technological empire powered by the box, and prosperity SEEMINGLY reigned, and Andrias, much like our heroines, had two close friends, a toad and a frog. But one day they betrayed him, abandoning him and seemingly stealing the box , leaving his mechanical marvels powerless and Andrias bitter and angry. Hence the whole revenge ploy. 

In an unsurprising and invincible-esque twist, he reveals his ancestors were not explorers but CONQUERERS and he intends to finish their work, placing the box on a pedestal that turns his castle into a flying fortress glowing blue. It only gets worse from there: the castle’s awakening also activates factories around Amphibia similar to the one we saw back in “Fort in the Road” that gave us Frobo and it turns out their dark purpose.. is to create armies of unstoppable soldiers to secure his dominon.... and spread it to the other worlds. The reason he didn’t send the girls home is he figures correctly Anne and the others will try and stop him from TAKING it. 

So yeah Anne’s reaction is very naturally...

And despite being outgunned, outmanned, outnumbered and outplanned she plans to make an all out stand. She realizes that her own fight with Sasha only allowed something FAR WORSE to take hold. She’s not WRONG for fighting her, Sasha was being a shithead taking over and did so for flimsy and selfish reasons and she had no reason to listen to her.. but had she at least thought over giving him the box and not simply given it to him to spite her none of this would be happening. So she and the plantars get ready for round 2, with Sasha having her back this time, and Grime having Sasha’s. It’s a really sweet moment, showing Sasha has realized just how much her own greedy and controlling ambitions have cost her and that she’s brought about something far worse thorugh them, and is ready to make amends and Grime as always ready to stand by the only true family he has. 

But before the carnage can begin.. Marcy stops them... and then tearfully turns to Andrias “This wasn’t our deal!”. Andrias, now not having to play nice, dosen’t care and cruelly points out of course he did: He would’ve said whatever it took to get her to fill the box and she did it. He also hints at Marcy’s dark secret, with both girls wondering what the hell he’s on about.. but clearly starting to piece it together, with Andrias cruelly toying with Marcy to tell them before he does.. and barely gives her any time before going ahead with it anyway, knowing she’d be unable to. And with this we get the best line of the episode and Keith david’s best delivery.. and given he makes a fucking seven course meal of the entire second act, yeah that’s a high bar.

"Did it ever occur to you — Anne, Sasha — that one of you knew more than she was letting on? That one of you might've gotten you stranded in Amphibia... on purpose?"

The line itself hits like a sledgehammer. We knew for the full episode she did this on purpose.. but we also knew at some point it was clearly going to come out and hurt them both.. and to see someone Marcy clearly saw as a better replacement dad, someone she thought cared about her and was offering her her dreams for no gain on his end cruelly tell them clearly for his own amusment as he dosen’t remotely see them as a threat.. it’s utterly chilling as it is heartbreakiing and horrifying. 

Naturally Anne and Sasha are upset, Sasha a bit baffled and Anne just utterly broken by this: She’d already been betrayed TWICE by the other love of her life.. now MARCY had betrayed her.. and WORSE? 

And it only gets worse as Marcy heartbreakingly reveals her motivation and what this was really all about: Her dad announced he got a new job and they were moving a state away.. and like I said he’s a prick. Not for moving, that happens and it sucks but for having no freaking empathy about it. Maybe if he took a parenting class earth wouldn’t be on the cusp of a robot invasion. Marcy was about to loose her girls and was desperate.... so naturally Andrias claimed to simply want to take them all with him on his journeys, obviously leading out the conquest and likely genocide part, so they could go on and on FOREVER. And this whole thing gave Anne the plantars so it’s not all bad right? Right? But it’s clear she’s trying to desperatly lie to herself this was all okay as she’s been doing ever since she started this all 8 months ago and Anne pointing out she misses her family, something Marcy never considered given her own reasons for leaving and how Sasha likely dosen’t have a happy family life herself. 

This.. this is Haley Tju’s finest hour. She’s done good voice work before, especially in this series but here, with Marcy’s anguish, desperation and guilt all leaking out as she tries to get her girlfriend not to turn away from her. it’s all just amazing heartbreaking stuff and I salute her and the animation does her fine acting a service and shows every bit of pain in the poor girls face. 

Anne naturally does turn away a bit and Marcy cries.. but Anne quickly recovers... while she obviously isn’t entirely ready to forgive Marcy JUST yet, it’s clear she wasn’t thinking straight and did all of this out of desperation... and that the hulking dickbag who betrayed them all and is gloating about all of this manipulated her, preying on her desperation and anguish to finish his plan.  Marcy fucked up big time, no question.. but ANDRIAS is the true monster here, and if he’s not stopped this world she’s grown to love and the one she left behind will BURN. Anne may be many things: impulsive, kinda weird, easy to anger.. but she is over all that a HERO. And there’s a villian to stop

Andrias, while not seeing them as remotely a threat, does admit this will probably be fun and the fight begins, with our heroes, including Marcy, easily besting the Obsdian Swarm.. as i’m calling them now. It’s a cools equence.. but ultimately futile. Andrias is FAR more powerful than he’s let on with the box. And shows it off by destroying toad tower before coming at them with a fire sowrd, easily swatting them aside like flies. They try their best to fight back but it’s not much use, and Andrias NEARLY crushes polly to death under his fist. Yes a fucking child. What a dick. 

Frobo saves him... and sadly this is the end for our new friend as Andrias is mildly amused that one of his creations glitched.. then smashes him into robotic paste. Polly rightfully calls him a monster and his response is as chilling as it is wonderfully dickish: “Don’t worry, your next”. 

Thankfully though she got out of the way.. because she has LEGS now. It’s also why I keep saying 8 months, though it’s likely more like 9 given it took a month to get to newtopia: 

The prophecy has come true! And while she stumbles for a second Polly quickly proves she can really move, she has an attitude and she’s the fastest thing alive by grabbing the box seemingly winning.. except Andrias has sprig in his fist and is going to crush or drop him ulness she stops. And despite Sprig BEGGING his sister to let him go for the sake of everyone else, like any good hero she naturally puts the box back. 

Anne begs for him to let Sprig go since he got what he wanted and he’s her best friend in this or any world... but all this does is insprie Andrias to DROP HIM OUT A WINDOW, bitter over his own past and eager to torture her some more. This really shows off who Andrias REALLY is now the mask is off; a sadistic tyrannical bully who relishes in making his victims really squirm, revels in malevolence and is just so damn gleeful about it: Not to say BIll Cipher levels more of a cold, cruel enjoyment of things. 

As I said earlier Keith David makes a motherfucking Seven Course Meal out of the second half of this episode, utterly stealing the show now he can play Andrias as he truly is: not skulng in the shadows with ominus hints he’s evil or pretending to be nice, but instead as a sadistic brute who delights in suffering and wants nothing less than everything under his boothill. in short he’s an AWESOME antagonist and while Keith David has played TREMENDOUS villains before, this one will easily be his best if the writing holds. Andrias is Keith David at his fucking best and proves the Disney legend has EVEYRTHING left in the tank even as he approaches 70′s. Jesus I fucking love this man. 

So this causes anne to retreat into herself, leaving us in a black void as Anne remembers all the good times.. and goes MOTHERFUCKING SUPER SAYIAN. Well more accurately super sayian god super sayian, or blueper sayian if you will, but still i’ts a n utterly striking sequence and a clear direct shout out with Anne getting her powers the same way Goku did: loosing someone to an utterly cruel bastard. Same with Gohan’s upgrade to super sayian 2. It’s just a truly striking sequence as she powers up in a FULL rage, DEMANDNIG he give him back. 

Andrais is stunned, clearly knowing this was something she was capable of but thought she could no longer do as the box shoudlv’e drained her of the ablility, while Hop Pop and Grime wonder if this is a human thing. 

So Anne WAILS on the fucker, easily besting a shocked andrias despite his best attempts.. but she tires out and he swats her aside, gleefully noting she dosen’t know how to control it. Sprig turns out to be okay though. Marcy went and saved him while Anne was rippig Andrias asunder.. and then activates the box. Sasha and Grime hold him off while Anne makes a run for it with the plantars while Andrias gives out your standard villian big no. Anne and Fam make it... but Marcy is taking a sec.. and that second gets her GUTTED. Not an exageration or me being a smart ass like usual.. Andrias RAN HER THROUGH WITH HIS SWORD. 

His only response is “Look what you made me too and Anne and crew are warped away, unable to save her. 

So we end with our heroes landing somewhere and Sprig wondering where they are... where they are is on the top of a car on a busy Los Angeles Freeway... and in front of two very weirded out humans. Anne is home. 

So now for the part that wasn’t in the original release apparently: The teaser.. aka THE MOTHERFUCKING SEASON 3 OPENING. 

Hell. Yes. Just a few quick personal notes before we hit the wrap up: I love how the season will be on earth, a nice change of pace, how the Boonchuy’s have very clearly warmly welcomed the plantars, the expanded cast at the title card, and how Disney just let them go ALL out for this one. They’ve clearly stopped being cheap assholes when it comes to letting intro’s change or at the very least got this was the very end of the series and thus important enough to gussie up. But yes the end is nigh.. and probably not till late this year if this year AT ALL And I will return for it. Well return to doing this show anyway, i’m not going anywhere. They’ll have to pry this blog from my cold dead hands. 

Final Thoughts:

This episode is the series best so far. My only honest complaint is the Toad Invasion comes and goes really quickly and I question why it was crammed into half the episode. Don’t get me wrong, Andrias’ rise needed the full 10 minutes, but I question why we dind’t get an episode before this settingit up and THEN have it happen over half an episode, epsecially since we spent an entire episode on getting the other toad barons involved only for ONE of them to show up for all of five minutes. 

Otherwise though? Yeah no notes. The cast is at the top of their damn game, with Brenda Song, Hailey Tju and Keith Motherfucking David as the standouts, the animatoin is likewise, and it pays off a thing or two you wouldn’t expect like the acting episode. This is a truly outstanding finale, one that has now joined other all time faviorite season finales such as “You’re In Control”, “Reunited”, “The Crossroads of Destiny”, and “Moonvasion”. I will be watching this again when it comes to Disney Plus. Masterful stuff.

As for the season as a whole.. this was a great season. While it did start a bit rocky with the road trip arc, which I’m still not a huge fan of as I feel it mostly wasted an awesome idea of them going on a world spanning roadtrip with some fairly weak episodes, with the exception of standouts “Truckstop Polly” and “Wax Museum”. 

But once we got to Netwopia it got better, with better spotlight episodes, the pacing picking up and Marcy joining our merry crew. And it hit it’s peak with the second half of the season: the return to wartwood effortlessly combined slice of life with the compelling temple episodes. It was also a nice break before the utter hell that arrived in the finale, but still nicely lead up to said finale.  This season may of STARTED bumpy but it finished at it’s highest point and with one epic finale to go it’s only going to get better from here. 

As for this blog the same holds true: Review wise next week i’ll be taking a break from normal reviews to do a week’s worth of Goofy based content in time for his birthday, from shorts, to goof troop, to hosue of mouse, to an obscure special, all leading up to the Disney Classic A Goofy Movie. So stick around.

And if that dosen’t do it for you I have an ongoing retrospective on the story arcs of ducktales season 2, i’m nearing the end of one on Scott Pilgrim and in the middle of one of The Life and Times of Scrogoe McDuck. and if you prefer weekly reviews, as I mentioned earlier offhandidly i’ll be covering the Owl House! LIke Amphibia i’m starting with Season 2, but just like with this show i’m excited as all hell and hope you’ll join me. And if you need even more I have a patreon, patreon.com/popculturebuffet, where I have exclusive reviews if you choose to back me as well as exciting stretch goals, one of which down the line is reviewing season one of this very show. So join it and if not that’s okay too, either way.. it’s been a pleasure. 

[betweentheracks]

Updates//Recent Inactivity

Hello all! This is me finally taking some time to sit down and offer up a rundown on how life is currently going as a means of explaining my inactivity. This is a personal post that is guaranteed to be both rambling and emotional so if that is not your cup of tea, I understand and happily advise you just skip over this post as it is not relevant to the actual content this blog was intended for.

EDITED: After reading this back I now realize this is really just me spilling the tea on my own life and is laughably dishy in details which is extremely not my usual stance on my personal privacy. But idk, it was cathartic so I'm leaving it as is despite the urge to redact 70% of what I say.

I'll start with the good news that I am officially out of lockdown and have remained COVID-19 free since my return home from the hospital. This also means my son finally was allowed to come home to me which is dazzling and exciting and also a little terrible too. He's at a precocious age where tantrums are the cool way to communicate and having been gone for so long completely thrashing his established routine has caused friction. He came home and his parent was not the same as when he left; is much weaker and less energetic than before, paler and shaky - but also there's the addition of my best friend having moved in to assist and take care of me/him while we all do our best to muddle through.

The readjustment has been rough and a lot of this week has made me incredibly thankful to have practically zero memory of how I was as a child. There have been injuries: I have been whacked in the face with the metal cover for a floor vent while dozing on the sofa instead of paying rapt attention to whatever silliness he was showing off to me, there was his complete dismissal of me asking him to stay back and away from the hot oven as I pulled lunch from it's fiery jaws only to then be faced with a toddler quickly approaching with his hand raised to touch so I naturally made a move to block him and in the process I let go of the oven door which slammed upward and clamped my arm tightly between it and the inside cavern of the oven while it was set to a roasty 400 degrees Fahrenheit - earning me a mangled arm with burns of varying degrees, and then we also had that fit where it seemed like a much more grand idea to scale the babygate cordoning the stairs and I had to rush up them to stop him from tumbling face first down two flights and of course did the falling all on my own and did it backwards then slammed painfully into the wall of the landing. This all happened within a 48hr time frame and makes me wonder why I am so catastrophically inclined.

I have bruises that range the majority of my spine courtesy of the wall and stairs, two minor first degree burns on my forearm that are in the shape of an equals and quite large despite the lack of actual pain I feel from them, and the underside of my forearm was instantly blistered then popped then melted down into a horrid glob of skin mush and sticky red-orange and is a second degree burn that I have been assured is no real cause for concern as long as I tend it with care. In all, I managed to escape my momjuries relatively unscathed and with a child that was scared senseless at having hurt his momma and is quick to listen and never stops cuddling me in the time since. Here's hoping he isn't significantly traumatized from this since exactly none of this is especially his fault and is due to my clumsy, accident-prone status in life.

So yes, The Toddler has returned home to me and after some happenings we have settled and are happy. However, his blast from the past father has suddenly just decided to reemerge after more than a year of radio silence and static and has slapped me with a custody petition. Hooray. While I have no worries on this matter due to my mother working for one of the top custody lawyers in the state and snagging him as my representation, and the utter lack of competency on my estranged baby daddy's end clearly being displayed in literally anything and everything the idiot does/says, I do have to now go through the overhaul of a custody case and that is just so weak and exhaustive. Not to mention the basis of his claims that I am not fit to raise a child are founded in my health concerns and the crazy work schedule I keep; ironically, my health is making it so that I have much less insane hours and makes this fairly moot but to each their own I guess. Also worth noting on this matter is that he only did this now because he was recently placed under penalty for child support back pay and nothing in this world matters to him like his money and this is his special way of getting one over on me for tampering with his meager earnings. (He's a wannabe musician - the soundcloud rapper sort, just so we are all on the same page here). If I thought for even a second this was a genuine desire to be an active and stable parent I would be a lot less pressed to act in favor of making it legally binding that he can only see him under a supervisory condition and share time evenly, but it just is not believable in the slightest.

So the thing is - my health is actually quite dismal presently. I'm due in for open heart surgery on the 8th of April and until then I have been doing my utmost to mind all the nagging I get from doctors, PT specialists, the surgeons that will be slicing and dicing me, and my in-family medical practitioner that sometimes remembers he is also my brother and not just an MD. But like, you guys, this surgery is terrifying and technically is two surgeries rolled into one. They'll be cracking my chest open and then stopping my heart while they lift it from where it sits sweetly unhinged and lopsided in my body and very finely shave away some of the excess muscle that has built up around the wall of my heart as well as some unfriendly scar tissue that has lingered since my last surgery years ago. Granted there is no accidental slip that nicks my ugly gargantuan heart and renders me as good as dead, once this first part is finished the other surgeon will need to be deft and very quick to place this ventricular assisting piece in the valve that has all but given up on functioning altogether and do so in the time remaining before the time limit for my heart being essentially unplugged from by body is up, which would also feasibly mean my death. Lots of exciting and terrible sounding consequences, am I right?

Well let's bear it in mind that I am just below 30 in age and therefore not duly experienced in the realm of facing down my own mortality via making all necessary legal arrangements and managing my affairs and assets so that, in event of my untimely death, the custody case still doesn't stand a chance of snatching my son away to the sad misfortune of being raised by a man that has stated openly he only has interest in his kids so far as what they can do for him/get for him in terms of benefit and that he would be unwilling to be hypocritical and never deter his children from drugs and a lifestyle of extremely questionable moral integrity and hygiene alike. Eugh. But I also have had to make sure there is a DNR in place just in case things go wrong during the operation, my will has also been finalized and notarized, all my savings and financial/material assets have been squared away to come into my child's inheritance when he is of age and, most importantly, a document that states clear and direct instructions for him to be placed in care of my mother or, if she is unwilling or incapable, he will be under custodial order and guardianship of my best friend whom he has always viewed as a pseudo-dad anyway. Legally binding and even in light of the paternity petition this document supersedes parental right by way of the provided evidence I have submitted to prove a lack of parental credibility. That's right, I spent days lowkey stalking and sleuthing about to capture what I needed to show this man for what he actually is and I have precisely zero guilt or shame for doing it; this is my child on the line and that means momma doesn't have to play by the rules of snitches getting stitches or whatever other scary street rules he tosses at me as idle threats. (He's done this routinely for all the years I have known him, and it is somehow both pathetic and hilarious because he knows for a fact that, if I wanted, I could throttle him in less time than it would take for him to form a rational thought between his drug soaked braincells - I was also a person of less than savory character not too long ago and can handle myself very well. But I digress because I am losing my track of thought.

After the surgery I will have so damn much PT and rehab, all of which will be specific to varying parts of my body that will need to be reworked and strengthened. Weeks, months of it really. This surgery is major and hits heavy enough that I will be in the hospital for at least 10-14 days just recovering from it without taking into consideration any number of complications that could pop up. Hell, if they get in there and find a situation worse than they currently have an understanding of in the limited capacity of cardiology tech can provide of such a gnarled beastly heart and realize they can't really do anything with it after all, I'll be added to the transplant list. I think this is more daunting to consider than the surgery, honestly.

In that way that doctors have about them, I was "comforted" by being informed that this was an inevitability and I would have been faced with this in a matter of years - less than a handful actually - but the way COVID-19 chewed through me sped it up. I'm sure my years of substance issues were also very helpful in this endeavor, but either way I still am unsure whether I feel better knowing this or not? Mostly I think I feel conflicted and hopeful tempered with the caution of life being super shady in the ways it has often brought me to the doorsteps of dying in situations that seem like odd chance. I also am gifted with being so capable in jinxing myself that I brought myself to COVID-19 ("The way life is going I'll probably square up with Rona next week or some bullshit." Positive test flagged within the following week) and also into labor ("Watch me go into labor on Labor Day since that would be the sort of universal pun that would strike my bad penny having ass." Indeed hatched my youngling on Labor Day of that year) by saying some things within the scope of my bad humor that instantly manifested as reality so I'm not taking any risks here lol.

The gist is that life is really stirring up the winds over here and so I haven't been online and posting anything that would make my blog valid in a fat minute. I do apologize for this and also for the fact that this post took me nearly a week to type up, but when things calm a little I will be back in full. For the time being I will be sporadic and do what I can when I can!

Thanks to anyone that read this mess all the way here! And a big thank you to all of you still supporting me!

[saiilorstars]

Rise Up

Ch.12: For the Girl Who Had Everything

Previous Story: It Had To Be You || Current Masterlist

Pairings: Barry Allen x OFC

Chapter Summary: Team Flash enlists the help of newcomer Black Orchid to save Belén and Barry from Datura's and Poison Ivy's clutches. While they figure out the best course of action, Belén and Barry are each submerged into their own personal worlds...turned nightmares?

Pronunciation of OC: Bell-en. The last syllable has an emphasis so it’s not pronounced like ‘Helen’ would be.

Taglist: @ocfairygodmother​ @anotherunreadblog​​ @transformerfan97​ ​ @stareyedplanet​ @perfectlystiles​ [If you’d like to be part of this OC’s taglist, let me know!]

Author's Note: 

Itaclis is for Belén's world.

Bold is for Barry's world.

~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~

"Belén? You ready to go?" Iris' voice didn't register until the third time she asked the same question.

Belén finally blinked and tore her eyes from the nothingness she'd been entranced with. She blinked a couple times until she realized she was standing in front of a metal table, inside what looked like a laboratory. She herself was wearing a lab coat and some protective glasses. "...what?" she whispered. Where the hell was she!?

"Belén, we're going to be late!" Iris exclaimed. "Don't tell me you have cold feet already!"

"Cold feet—what?" Belén made a face that indicated pure, honest confusion. "What are you talking about?"

"Hey," Linda Park strode into the lab with her phone in hand. "Caitlin says she's already at the store. We good?"

"Yeah, I'm just waiting for Belén to get with the program," Iris chuckled. "I think she's got cold feet."

"Already?" Linda gaped. "You're not at the aisle yet."

Aisle?" Belén repeated, though something inside told her she'd be figuring it out in a couple seconds. Her eyes found her left hand where a shiny silver ring sat on her ring finger. "Oh my God is that an engagement ring!?" she practically screeched.

Now she had the odd stares from Iris and Linda.

"She's out of it," Iris shook her head.

"We gotta go or we're going to be late," Linda said.

Between the two, they grabbed Belén's things, pulling her protective glasses off and her lab coat, and dragged her out of the building...all in the meanwhile she had a meltdown over the news.

"What do you mean I'm getting married!? I can't get married!" she frantically looked between the two women holding her arms. They were walking her down the street as if she'd try to run away from them, and actually...if given the chance, she might just.

"Belén, wake up!" Iris gave her an odd glance. "This has been going on for almost a year now. This is the last fitting of your wedding dress—"

"I don't have a wedding dress because I'm not getting married!" Belén exclaimed. "I never got engaged! I am not engaged!"

"Jesus, Belén, how many hours of sleep did you get last night?" Linda asked, giving Belén the same look Iris had.

"The right amount to know that I never got engaged to anyone!" Belén finally wrestled free from their hooks and whirled around to face them. She pointed a sharp finger at the two women, warning them not to get any closer. "Now listen to me when I say that I am not getting married!"

"Fine, but you're the one who's going to explain that to Barry later," Iris said, freezing Belén in her spot.

The ombre-blonde blinked several times as the words hit her. "... Barry?" she repeated. "I'm...getting married...t-to Barry?" Iris and Linda both nodded their heads. "What…?" Belén felt light headed. Oh yes she did. "...when…?"

When she started rocking on her feet to the point of nearly falling, Iris and Linda hurried to catch her.

"Oh God Belén, don't tell me your already pregnant!" Linda's laugh was no joke for Belén who nearly fell again.

"Don't say that! I'm not—what is going on!?" Belén shouted to the air.

~0~

"Shivhan Jang," Cisco loudly read the name off the profile he had posted on the screen on wall for the others to see, "Twenty-seven year old with no actual priors…"

"Then why is she in our system?" Joe cut him off and pointed to the fact Cisco had the CCPD system open for them to see.

A smile spread across his face. "She had a speeding ticket she never paid."

"Okay, moving on?" Iris motioned them not to get so stuck on that one detail. They were on a time limit here, after all.

"Okay," Cisco clapped his hands together before continuing with his briefing. "Let's see. She and her family emigrated from Korea when she was 5, she's been a part of Central City's school records since kindergarten but we've got no college attendance. She dropped out."

"What about her powers?" Joe asked. "Did she get them from the Particle Accelerator?"

"Yup, there's footage of her in a flower shop the night the Particle Accelerator went off. I'd show it to you but it is not pretty."

"Can we trust her?" Joe wearily asked. He couldn't believe they were relying on a woman Belén technically kidnapped.

"She wants her freedom…" Cisco reminded.

"But how do we know she won't run out on us as soon as Caitlin finishes healing her?"

"Because we're chipping her," Cisco said so matter-of-factly that both Joe and Iris stared at him in shock.

"We're what?" Iris put a hand behind her ear just to make sure she was listening clearly.

"Relax," Cisco waved her and Joe off. "It's just a lie, but she won't know that. We tell her we found a way to switch her powers off. She likes her powers. She will help us."

"I don't know," Joe shook his head. "Sounds like we're being…"

"Shady?" Iris finished for him. "First, Belén kidnaps her, then we force her to help us with lies and deceit?"

"The situation is dire, Iris!" Cisco snapped. "We're not hurting her and we really are letting her go afterwards. Belén can kill us later."

"And you know she will kill us for letting her go," Iris reiterated that part just so they all knew what was going to come after. Cisco seemed more or less prepared for it.

~0~

"Barry?" someone softly called. "Barry?"

The speedster in question stirred awake after about the fourth call of his name. He opened his eyes and met a white sheet bunched up beside him. A bed. He was laying on a bed.

"Barry?"

It clicked to Barry that it was Belén calling his name. He sat upright and rubbed his eyes. There was something wrong here and he couldn't tell what it was.

"Good morning," Belén was sitting near the foot of the bed, to Barry's left, and was smiling at the speedster. "You must have been really tired because I've been trying to wake you up for a good 15 minutes now."

"What happened?" Barry dropped his hands from his face, though he was still partially groggy. "I thought I was…" but he trailed off when he finally looked at Belén. "Oh my God…Belén you're-you're…" He could finish the words in one go.

Belén raised an eyebrow at him. "What? Barry, are you okay?"

But Barry was speechless. Now he knew there was definitely something wrong. "You're...pregnant."

Belén's look indicated she was worried for him and not herself, like he was. She gazed down at her pregnant belly, which looked to be around 4 months at least, and chuckled. "Okay, what were you dreaming about that's got you so out of it?"

Barry's mouth was gaping and it didn't look like it would be closing anytime soon. "What!? But you're —"

"Pregnant, yeah," she nodded. "Have been for 5 months now. Did you just notice, or…?"

Barry looked like he would pass out at any moment. "When did that — how did that — what!?"

"Okay, Barry, you're seriously worrying me now."

"I'm... ut you're pregnant! You're—" Barry was stopped only because Belén had put her hand over his mouth. Still, his eyes were wide in alarm.

"I know, pregnant," Belén nodded slowly. "We've been through this. Now I'm going to take my hand off your mouth and we're going to get ready for the day. We've got work. Got it?" Barry slowly nodded and, keeping her word, Belén drew her hand away from his mouth. "There," she smiled, "All better. Now c'mon! I'm craving some chocolate banana pancakes!" She pecked his lips and scooted off the bed, though it was a bit of a struggle.

All Barry did was watch her go with wide, wide eyes.

~ 0 ~

Belén felt like she couldn't breath...and it wasn't because of the wedding dress hugging her body. No, no, it was the world she was living in.

"Belén, you don't look so happy," Caitlin's voice drew Belén's gaze from her reflection. She'd been staring at herself in the mirror for a good five minutes, but she wasn't in-tune with the rest of reality. "You look beautiful."

They were inside the store where apparently Belén had ordered her wedding dress from. Caitlin, Iris and Linda were sitting across her, watching her in delight as they got a full view of the finished dress.

"Yeah, um…" Belén cleared her throat and turned away from the mirror. "I'm just...it doesn't feel real…"

Caitlin smiled. "Yeah, that's understandable."

"You look so pretty, girl!" Linda exclaimed. "Barry's going to lose it when he sees you!"

At the mention of Barry, Belén stiffened. She looked down at her left hand again, where the shiny ring still sat. "I'm…" she swallowed hard. "I need my Mom. Where is she?"

"At home, where else?" Iris gave her a strange look. "You and her don't really talk, remember?"

Well, that rang right.

"I...need to see Barry, then," Belén figured if anyone would tell her the truth it would be Barry. Of course, the others didn't see it that way.

"You just can't wait, huh?" Linda gave her a smirk.

Belén reddened in a short minute. "Oh God, stop!"

"Oh give her a break," Caitlin waved them off, but of course they just burst into laughter.

"I need to see Barry, where is he?" Belén grabbed Caitlin's wrist. "Please?"

Of course Caitlin told her Barry was at the precinct. That also rang truth. Needless to say, Belén dragged Caitlin back to the fitting room so that she could help unzip the damn dress for her. She needed to get away from there and find Barry.

She didn't even think about giving any of her friends an explanation for her hasty leave...but it wasn't like they weren't going to guess. Luckily for her, the way to the precinct was just like it always was. There were few things that seemed just like her world, but this couldn't be it.

She kept thinking that as she walked into the precinct.  She was only halfway into the bullpen when she spotted Barry coming out of the Captain's office. Well, he seemed normal.

"Barry?" she called once and had his full attention.

His face brightened and soon he bid goodbye to his co-worker. He came directly to her and greeted her with a kiss that, honestly, felt pretty real. "Hey," Barry smiled at her. "How'd it go today?"

"Hm?" it took Belén a few seconds to realize he meant her trip to the wedding dress store. "Oh, right, um...we gotta talk about that."

"Oh, okay," Barry nodded. "You want to go up to the lab?"

Belén agreed and allowed him to take her hand—her left hand—and lead her out of the bullpen. His hand felt real enough to be him...but there was something inside telling her that this was all wrong.

~ 0 ~

Caitlin finished stitching up the last bit of open skin on Shivhan's shoulder. Soon as she said she was done, Shivhan pulled up the STAR Labs shirt she'd borrowed up to her shoulder again.

"Thanks," Shivhan mumbled and got up from the medbed. "So, what do I do next?"

"Well, we're making you a tracker and implanting a communications system to your suit so we can talk to you while you're out," Caitlin picked up her tablet she'd left on the table.

"And when do I get to go out?"

"Soon."

Shivhan sighed loudly in annoyance. "Sure, take your time. Not like I'm in a hurry to leave."

Caitlin looked up from her tablet. "Why? We could offer you help here."

"I don't need help from you people. You let the Azalea and the Flash get kidnapped. Good going."

Caitlin pursed her lips at the hard jab. She couldn't exactly argue much in their defense there, right? Shivhan seemed to know what she'd done because she smirked.

Caitlin briefly glared in return them added, "And yet you needed my help stitching you back up." That made Shivhan's smirk falter. "Don't have many doctors around you?"

"They tend to get robbed where I'm from," Shivhan meant to leave the room, though she had no idea where she'd be going since she didn't know STAR Labs yet.

"Then maybe we can help you after this," Caitlin's offer forced Shivhan to turn around. "Help out that neighborhood of yours…"

"That is my territory. I will take care of it!"

A ghost of a smile appeared on Caitlin's face. "I guess it's not all about self preservation."

Now it was Shivhan's turn to glare. Caitlin, on her part, just smiled kindly.

"It's okay. That's your home and you have every right to be defensive about it. Why do you think neither the Azalea nor the Flash leave Central City? It's their home too and they want to defend it."

Shivhan rolled her eyes, but secretly she respected that. She was big on loyalty. And right now...she supposed she had to be loyal to the two metas who'd been defending them all this time.

"Dammit," she muttered under her breath. "Alright, let's go get those two metas."

~ 0 ~

Belén stared at her engagement ring while Barry went around his lab to clean up some things before they left.

"Hey Bells," he called, unknowingly using her nickname she was sure he wasn't supposed to know in this fake world. "Could you give me that file?"

Belén followed his gaze to the desk behind her and picked up said file. He nodded that it was that one and so she handed it to him.

"You have a lot of work today?" she asked as a means to keep the silence away and, honestly, to weed out any information that could help her figure out what was going on.

"Just a big case," Barry left the file flat at a table. "I think I have everything good but you know Captain Jang wants everything to be perfect."

"Captain Jang?" Belén repeated.

"Shivhan Jang?"

Belén blinked in shock. That was the bartender she met…

"Oh my God. Shivhan Jang?" she brought an index finger to bite on.

"What are you doing?" Barry walked back to her. "You don't usually bite your nails."

"I don't?"

He pulled her finger from her mouth and shook his head. "No. You work at a lab. You think it's disgusting."

"A lab...right…" Belén pursed her lips there. "What do I do there again? I thought I was a reporter or something…"

Barry laughed. "Right. Like you would ever leave your botany for anything."

"I'm a...botanist…" Belén nodded her head. Oh yeah, there was something wrong here because she didn't have a clue as to what a botanist would do. She loved her plants, but...she was no scientist.

"I think this whole wedding preparation is taking a toll on you," Barry smiled at her. "Thank God it's almost over, right?"

"Hmm? When is…?"

"Next week! Can you believe it?" Barry didn't notice her shock as he picked up her left hand to stroke her skin. "Feels like yesterday was the day I proposed. The park's fountain water was really cold."

"You proposed at our park fountain?" Belén blinked. That...sounded like it could be real. Their park fountain did have special memories.

"Course," Barry smiled at her. "Now I just really want us to get to the date so I can call you my wife."

"Wife…" Belén said the word and felt like she lost air. It did make her feel butterflies in her stomach. "I'm...going to be your... wife…"

No one could take the big grin off Barry's face. Belén certainly couldn't do it, even if she did know it wasn't real.

"Sooo…how's about I take my fiance out for some lunch?" Barry brought her hand up to his lips for a kiss.

Goddammit , Belén swooned. She nodded slowly and silently while her heart jolted in her chest.

~0~

By this point, Barry knew there was something so, so wrong. After a rather quiet breakfast with Belén, he practically raced to get to work. Least there, things seemed normal. The only thing that wasn't the same was the fact Veronica wasn't part of the precinct, neither was Patty.  By the time lunch came around, Barry was going crazy trying to figure out what was wrong with his world. When Belén walked in, she found Barry at his desk with his head down and hands over his head's back.

"Barry?" her voice immediately pulled him up in a sitting position.

There she was, looking very...pregnant. He almost did a double take, but it was enough for Belén to notice.

"I know...not very...pretty-" she made a gesture at her stomach. "-appealing."

"No, that's not -" Barry didn't know what to say to her. It was hard enough looking at her. "I'm sorry."

"Instead of an apology, I'd really like to know what's going on with you," she walked further inside the lab. "This morning you were... completely out of it."

Barry nodded. It was a fair request, but it wasn't an easy one to respond to. He turned his chair to face her and offered her a tiny small. "I'm just...having some trouble waking up." Wasn't that the truth.

"Yeah, I know I sleep crazy," Belén sheepishly smiled.

Barry gave her a look. She wasn't a crazy sleeper. He didn't have the chance to sleepover with her a lot, but the few times he did she always slept peacefully. She barely moved.

Just something else that was wrong.

"Can we go to lunch?" Barry asked her. The only way he would figure out what was going on was if he got to talking.

Belén would be the only one he could trust.

~0~

"Hey," Joe strode into the cortex rather quickly if anyone had paid enough attention. "Did we figure out a plan to get Barry and Belén back?"

"Working on it," Cisco was tinkering with a small device in his hands.

"Yeah, uh, we got another problem," Joe informed, making Cisco look up from his work.

"What?"

Joe looked shaky, jittery…

"Where is she!?" Veronica Green's voice carried into the room minutes before she appeared. She looked absolutely furious, and yet...terrified.

"Oh you didn't," Cisco shot Joe a look. The man rubbed the back of his head, to his credit looking guilty. "You told her!?"

"I had to. Her daughter's been kidnapped," Joe reminded. "I already have my own son out there. I know exactly what it feels like—"

"We were getting them back! She's mad as hell!" Cisco flapped a hand in Veronica's direction. "With a gun!"

"Oh give it a break and tell me where my daughter is," Veronica snapped. "I cannot believe you let her get kidnapped! This is exactly why I don't want Belén anywhere near this world!"

"Well she's in it and we're working on it," Cisco nearly snapped himself. "Now would you please stop shouting at me? I'm trying to work on something here!"

"What is it?" Joe spotted the small device in Cisco's hand.

"It's a comm. system for Shivhan," Cisco turned back for the table he'd been working at.

"Who's Shivhan?" Veronica crossed her arms.

"Someone helping us to get Belén and Barry back."

"This is crazy! Why can't we just get the CCPD into this!?"

Cisco shook his head and mumbled something that sounded like 'beginners'. He turned back woman with a polite smile. "Because these are dangerous, poisonous, metahumans that the CCPD is not capable of fighting."

Veronica looked outraged. Her eyes flickered to Joe and waited for him to say something in their defense, but of course he never did. "You're just going to let him say things like that?"

"I ain't fighting no poisonous metas," Joe gave her a crazed look. "I have seen first-hand what those two are like and believe me when I tell you that these guys-" he pointed at Cisco, "-know how to handle it. With some supervision of course."

"Kind of gave the compliment and took it away," Cisco mumbled to him before facing Veronica. "Look, Ms. Green, Belén knows how to handle herself. She can hang on until we get there to help her."

But that didn't seem to satisfy Veronica much. "You just take this so easily. Like it's normal." Before Cisco could say it pretty much was part of their daily meta life, Veronica went on. "I could lose Belén just like I lost Maritza and Rayan."

"You're not losing anyone," Joe pointed at her then moved his finger to Cisco. "And you gotta hurry up. We cannot let Datura and Poison Ivy keep Belén and Barry another minute."

Cisco agreed.

~ 0 ~

"Sooo...we're not getting lunch," Barry confessed as he and Belén walked down the street. They'd been walking for a while now and while Belén had thought of asking him to just speed them to their destination, the act of walking and talking was a better strategy to get more information.

Now though, she looked at him curiously. "What? Why not?"

"I have a surprise for you," he announced with that same cheeky smile he had in real life.

"Well, what is it?"

"It's just down the block," he nodded up ahead. They'd turned down a new block of houses recently but Belén wasn't sure what he was nodding at.

He walked them to the last house of the block. While he didn't say anything, Belén noticed the 'for sale' sign in the front yard now had a bright red 'sold' over it.

Barry stopped them at the front door and reached for something in his pocket. "I did a thing...a surprise...and...well…" he pulled out a key that he held between them, "Surprise."

Belén's dark eyes widened as she looked at the keys and the front door. "You didn't…"

"I did," nodded Barry. "We talked about it but with all the planning we never really got around to looking. I thought I'd do that and I found one I know you'll love."

"Barry, I…" Belén didn't know what to do nor say. Her head kept turning from his soft face to the front door.

"It's ours, Bells," he put a finger under her chin and gently turned her gaze to him. "It's our home."

Belén couldn't help it. Her eyes teared up. It wasn't real, she knew, but she couldn't help wish - for a brief second - that it was. She wished they weren't always in constant danger with metahumans trying to kill them. It always felt like there was more bad than good in their lives, more tears than smiles.

She wished they could just be happy and safe.

She threw her arms around Barry and hugged him tight. Barry wrapped his arms around her and pressed a kiss to her head.

"I love you, Bells," he whispered.

"I love you too," she closed her eyes tight.

~ 0 ~

"You did all that in the span of 3 hours?" Shivhan looked over the magenta colored suit Cisco had apparently made for her.

Cisco had brought the suit to the cortex for her and the others to see. They still weren't very sure of Shivhan but so far, she hadn't tried to run away...though they were aware she was under the lie that she was chipped.

"Yeah, well, I was a bit rushed," Cisco huffed. "But I'll get it done better after we get our friends back."

"Nina's on her way here," Iris looked up from her phone.

Beside her, Veronica shook her head. "I cannot believe Dr. Clarke is in on this as well."

"Goes to show you that everyone can be a meta and still have a life," Iris said as a means to support Belén's life style.

"Or it shows that everyone's a liar," Veronica made sure to look at everyone in the cortex.

"Hey, don't count me in your web, lady," Shivhan crossed her arms and looked Veronica in the face. "I'm here helping your daughter who, by the way," she made sure to look at Cisco, "I still don't know her actual name. But she knows mine? How's that fair."

"She found you fair and square," Cisco raised his hands.

Shivhan rolled her eyes and pointed at her new suit. "Tell me when I can wear this stupid thing, alright? I'm gonna go take a shot before I have to face a murderer." But just as she was leaving, Caitlin came into the cortex with a grim face.

"I think I know why Datura and Poison Ivy have been stealing from labs," she announced.

"She stole some sleep and dream prototypes, didn't she?" asked Joe.

"Yeah, and given everything else that she took, according to Harry...they might have used it to build a sort of...dream inducer."

"A dream what-now?" Veronica frowned at her. Even Shivhan turned around when she was meant to be finding a drink somewhere in the building.

"Harry and I went over it, and we're pretty sure they've put…" Caitlin briefly glanced at Shivhan before continuing, "...the Azalea and the Flash into dream comas. They're dreaming whatever Datura and Poison Ivy programmed them to."

"So they could basically be having nightmares?" Cisco shivered. "Like walking zombies? Or death?"

Caitlin hated he was choosing to put those images in their heads, especially when Veronica was right behind him.

"We need to get them out!" Veronica exclaimed. "My daughter could have the worst nightmare invented by some murderer!"

"Why put them through that, though?" Iris made the question no one else thought to ask. She received quite a look from Veronica.

"Who cares! We just need to get them out of it!"

"It matters because Datura obviously put a lot of thought into this plan," Iris argued. "It's only reasonable we try to figure out a reason why."

"Because she's a psychopathic murderer?" Shivhan shrugged. "Sometimes there's no reason except to just be plain mean."

"She's right," Harry's voice cut in before anyone else could say anything. He walked into the cortex, making it his first appearance since Belén and Barry were taken. The guilt, while he fought it, was burdening his shoulders. "Datura used to be calculating before she came to this Earth. Now she's acting just like Zoom. She wants to be better than the Azalea before killing her. Miss Jang is right. Sometimes there's no reason except to just be mean. And if Datura controls the worlds...she's going to be outright cruel."

~ 0 ~

"Oh yum," Belén took a whiff of her plate the moment it was set in front of her. She'd ordered steak with mashed potatoes and some vegetables.

Barry watched her eat and had to chuckle at her excitement. It definitely felt like her. When Belén noticed his stare, she blushed and stopped eating.

"I had an insane craving today for steak. It's cooked so...we should be good," she rubbed the top of her stomach.

The smile on Barry faltered for a second. Right. That was definitely not real. It couldn't be. But still…

"How, um...how did that happen?" he knew the moment he asked the question that it wasn't worded right and it would definitely put him in an awkward situation.

"How did what happen?" Belén raised an eyebrow at him. Barry didn't say anything but his eyes flickered to her stomach. "What? You mean when did I get pregnant? Barry! You were there!"

"I know, but—"

"I didn't make this happen on my own, you know!"

Barry cleared his throat while he felt his face warm up. "I haven't...we've never…" but of course he couldn't say finish that sentence because apparently it wasn't true here.

"We never what?" Belén demanded to know. "Don't tell me you're doubting your fatherhood all of a sudden."

Barry shook his head. But it was just another face that didn't fit in this reality. Because in his world, he never touched Belén. And she wasn't the type to cheat on him. There was no way in hell she could be pregnant.

"Seriously Barry, what is going on with you?" Belén put her fork down on the table. "All day today you've been so weird. I'm a little worried, honestly."

"I-I'm fine," Barry coughed. "I think I just hit my head or something."

"And you forgot things?" Belén smiled in amusement. "Or is it that dad-shock come early?"

Barry bobbed his head. Dad. It was wrong and he had to figure out a way to get out of it. "Hey Belén, what's your favorite color?"

"Pink, why? You knew that…?"

Dammit, that was right. "Why is it your favorite color again?"

"Um...because it's on my favorite flower, Azaleas."

Dammit, also right.

"Alright, Barry, now you're really - oh!" Belén suddenly froze which, of course, made Barry immediately panic.

"What? What is it—"

"It's moving! My baby's moving!" Belén exclaimed and shifted in her seat so that she could sit sideways. "Barry, come here!"

Barry didn't really know what to do, but for some reason his feet moved without his consent. In 2 seconds he was with Belén but his hands trembled as they went back and forth trying to decide whether or not to touch her.

Belén grabbed one of his hands and gently placed it over her belly. Sure enough, Barry felt the light thump underneath.

It'snotrealit'snotrealit'snotreal, Barry told himself repeatedly to remind himself that he couldn't get sucked into this fantasy.

But the thumps continued.

"She's moving," Belén smiled with tears in her eyes.

Barry's gaze snapped up to meet hers. "...she? It's a girl?" Belén nodded her head.

Oh my God it's not real, and yet as Barry told himself that he just couldn't take his hand off Belén's stomach. He was feeling his baby kick.

~ 0 ~

Barry had brought them into the house which turned out to be beautiful. Belén never really thought about house shopping, and much less house shopping with your fiance. She was letting herself get sucked into this world and she hated it...but she just couldn't snap out of it. As Barry led her into the dining table and the kitchen, describing all the things they could do...she found herself falling more in love.

"And I promise not to burn the house down trying to cook that lasagna of yours," he said after showing her the stove.

A light chuckle slipped through her lips. "It's cute you think you'll ever get my family's recipe."

"Well, I'm going to be part of your family now," he swiftly countered with. "You could make the exception, then…"

"Yeah, we'll see!" she bopped his nose and started heading out. "Let's go see upstairs!"

"But I want that recipe!" he called after her.

They came up to the second floor and found four doors. They poked their head inside the first door's room and found a small room that could be for a guest.

"Or, you know...for a...baby...or something…" Barry said quietly, though not that quietly because Belén heard perfectly.

She smiled to herself. "Yeah, maybe…" she turned and walked for the next room. It turned out to be a decent sized bathroom. "Oh, I love that mirror," she gawked at the long, rectangular mirror hanging on the wall. "Is that a marble counter?"

"Easy, you look more in love with that than me," Barry frowned as she stroked the counter.

She laughed. "Jealous, much?"

"Let's keep looking, c'mon. Our room has a balconyyyy…" he sing-sang for her and got her attention.

"Don't lie to me…"

"I'm not…"

Belén bolted from the bathroom and skipped the third door to go straight for what was meant to be their bedroom. She flung open the door and saw a large bedroom inside. There was a beautiful, sparkly chandelier on the ceiling. But then her eyes found the balcony and she definitely fell in love with it.

"Oh those are so pretty!" she squealed and rushed inside the room. "You know I miss that from when I used to live at my dad's house?"

"Yeah," Barry nodded. "I thought you might like this one."

"I do," she said before opening the balcony doors. She stepped outside and was met with a gentle breeze. "Oh my God I love this."

Barry came up from behind and wrapped his arms around her waist. "I'm glad you do." He pressed a kiss to her cheek and held her close. "Because this is our home. It's our room. And I can't wait to live here with you."

Belén breathed in a shaky breath. "Yeah…I'd love to live here with...you…" she turned around and ran her hands up and down his arms. "We'd be happy here."

"Course we will be," Barry smiled at her. He gently pulled her back into the bedroom. "Now you know why I can't wait for next week. Are you ready to become Mrs. Allen?"

"Uum…" Belén bit her lip. "Well...I would like to be...some day…"

"That day is so close," Barry nuzzled his nose next to hers while she brought her hands to rest on his shoulders. He soon kissed her.

~ 0 ~

In the real world, Datura ran her index finger down the side of Barry's face. The unconscious speedster was placed on a metal bed with a few pads on wires sticking to his face, all connected to a machine behind.

"Don't be tempted," Poison Ivy's smooth voice warned.

Datura looked up from the speedster and scowled. "Never. I just find...it amazing. Pure appearance, though." She gazed down at Barry, who was no longer wearing his cowl as that had been ripped off the moment he was knocked out. "It's too bad Zoom is going to kill him later on. If it was up to me...he'd get to live."

"Really?" Poison Ivy crossed her arms. "You would seriously let him leave?"

Datura rolled her eyes but said nothing more.

Poison Ivy dropped her arms and moved down the room until she came up beside the second bed placed only a few feet from Barry's. This one had Belén laying on it, unconscious and with the same wires on her face as Barry. Her mask had also disappeared. "And this one? Did she ever have a chance?"

"If she didn't have her powers, then maybe," Datura turned to face Belén, but as soon as she did...a deep glare settled over her face. There was only honest hatred towards Belén, whether Datura wanted to hide it or not.

"I don't think so," Poison Ivy shook her head. She passed a hand over Belén's face, thinking it would be so easy to just end her right there...but of course Datura would never want it to be that easy. "I believe that was the plan...until you met her...and saw what she had."

Datura met Poison Ivy's look and glared. "She has the powers that can save my life. That's what I need from her."

"So then let's just take them and leave," Poison Ivy knew her suggestion would be shut down but she had to make a point of saying it out loud. "Better yet, let's just take Belén and go back to our Earth. We can run all the tests we need back there, with people who will back us up, and we can do it all from the comfort of our home."

"No," Datura's voice was hard and final. "She dies here," she said with a clenched jaw. "Where her friends are, where her family is...and where her Barry is. They can all watch her die here. That is what I deserve. Watch her life crumble as mine did." Her eyes gazed over Belén's figure and, without her knowledge, one of her hands started glowing with one of her siphoned powers. "Let's make the nice dreams turn into nightmares." She moved to the machine controlling the dream worlds. "Because if I know Belén, she's getting sucked into the fantasy whether she likes it or not. And that means when it finally crashes down, it'll hurt even more. Let's make it rain with pain." She reached for one of the small knobs on the machine and happily turned it over until a new sound took it over. The faint blue glow it had turned into an angry red.

Poison Ivy noticed Datura's hand glowing again. She always did. She was always aware that her friend slowly slipping from her, and if they didn't do something soon...

Soon there would be nothing left of her friend.

~0~

"I've been thinking of some names," Belén confessed to Barry once the two were out of the restaurant.

Barry, who was holding her hand, looked down at her with the utmost curiosity. "Really? What are they?"

"You can veto them if you'd like. Like what Ross and Rachel did when they were having a girl," Belén's suggestion made Barry laugh. "I'm serious!"

"Just go ahead!"

"Fine. I was thinking about Reneé?"

"Mm, that's almost as bad as Ruth."

Belén rolled her eyes. "Alright. How about Alya?"

"Better," Barry nodded.

"Then there's Ximena. I also kind of like Valerie, Aileen, and Everly."

"You...have put a lot of thought into this," Barry concluded, making Belén laugh. "I like those..."

"Well since I'm not at the lab anymore, there's not a lot for me to do," she shrugged.

"Lab? What lab?"

Belén gave him a glance, waiting for him to take it back but of course he didn't. "My lab? My job? At Mercury Labs? My botany work!"

"... right, right," Barry quickly said in an attempt to keep things looking normal. "You're a...botanist…"

See that wasn't right either.

But he didn't have a lot of time to think about it. All of a sudden, they heard gunshots.

~0~

"When do you want to go to the furniture store?" Barry asked once they were out of the house. He was busy locking the front door of their new house.

Belén rocked on her feet while she thought about the idea. "Ummm...don't know. Whenever I guess."

"Well, I don't think we should waste time. We get married next week so we should have things semi-ready for then…" Barry trailed off when he noticed Belén looking at the bushes of their front yard. "What?"

"That would be the perfect spot to grow Azaleas," she said with a growing smile.

"Yeah? Go look at it, then. We can stop and buy some seeds."

Belén pointed at him, indicating she liked the idea. She moved to step down from the front porch when a strong force rumbled underneath her. "Wh-what's happening!?" she couldn't get her balance no matter how hard she tried. The ground shook with all its might.

"It's an earthquake!" Barry exclaimed.

~ 0 ~

No one seemed to know where the bullets were coming from at first, but the firing didn't stop.

And then people started going down.

Two across the street had blood splatter on their foreheads, on behind that caught a bullet in their chest.

"We gotta get out of here!" Barry exclaimed. His first reaction was to speed them out of there...until he realized he couldn't. "I don't have my powers," he realized in horror.

"Barry, I can't run…" Belén said fearfully as if she knew what was going to happen next.

"It's okay, we'll just go as far as you can," Barry tugged her hand forwards and made her at least sprint. He had no idea where those damn bullets were coming from except that they were nonstop.

He was about to turn them down a new block when he felt Belén's shake and scream. When he looked back, he saw a red dripping from the back of her neck. There was a bullet in the back of her head.

As quickly as the bullet came, the life slipped from her eyes. And Barry got to see it firsthand and up close.

"No! No! NO!" He screamed as he caught Belén's body from falling. Still, with his own body shaking, he dropped to his knees, with his arms cradling her body. "Belén!" he cried out but she was motionless. Her eyes were open, but still.

~ 0 ~

"Earthquakes don't happen in Central City!" Belén shrieked as she clung onto a pillar of the front porch.

"Well, they do!" Barry tried to find his footing anywhere he could.

The house was shaking and grumbling. Belén's eyes widened when she saw cracks started to run down from the pillar she was holding. Her first instinct was to let go, but in doing so she almost fell back if Barry hadn't caught her.

"We gotta get out of here!" he tried pushing them forwards, but every time he took a step the shaking forced them back 2 steps.

"How strong is this house?" Belén's gaze was rising as she saw the cracks spreading on the porch's ceiling. The cracks then became loud groans releasing bits of cement.

"Move!" Barry tried pushing her forwards again. She put all her effort into running but the shaking was too damn hard.

"AH!" she screeched when a chunk of a pillar slid off its place and fell just in front of her feet. She once again moved but with one hand fiercely holding onto Barry's. They just needed to get off the porch and onto the yard where they could wait the earthquake out.

But things went too fast.

"Belén!" Barry suddenly screamed before shoving Belén forwards with all his might. She toppled over the front steps with her own scream, but as soon as she raised her head off the ground she saw the porch ceiling crumble down over Barry.

"BARRY!" she screamed at the top of her lungs. "NO! NO!" she scrambled to her feet however she could and made way for the porch. Her vision was blurry but she saw dust and the pile of ceiling pieces over the porch. She tried to use her vines to take the pieces off, but to her horror she couldn't.

She didn't have her powers.

"No! No! C'mon!" she pulled and pulled at one piece but it was too heavy. With all her sobbing, she didn't even realize the shaking had stopped. All she knew was that Barry was trapped underneath and she couldn't save him. She dropped to her knees in front of the pillage and sobbed.

~ 0 ~

Datura had each of her hands touching Belén's and Barry's arms while she had her eyes closed. Soon as she opened her eyes, she met Poison Ivy's intent gaze from across.

"Well?" the ginger had her arms crossed.

A slight smirk spread across Datura's eyes. She was gleeful but she wanted to show some self control. She drew her hands from each of the metas' arms and sighed happily. "They're so distraught. Poor little soulmates have lost each other in such wicked ways. I only thank these powers of mine for letting me enter the mind."

"What now, then?" Poison Ivy walked towards them. "They're at their weakest, physically and mentally. Let's take Belén and go."

Before Datura could agree or disagree, a powerful blast of air threw her and Poison Ivy across the room.

"You're not taking my friend anywhere," the Tempest appeared in the air with her hands ready for a fight.

"Is this the Tempest I've read about?" Poison Ivy raised an eyebrow at the meta.

Datura groaned in annoyance. "More like a nuisance! Take care of her!"

"Fine, but we're getting the hell out of here with Belén!" Poison ivy got up on her feet and shot a vine directly at Nina.

However, a dark magenta vine ruptured the ground underneath Poison Ivy and chucked her to the side like actual trash. Datura blinked as her partner screamed before crashing down on the ground. When Datura turned back to Nina, she saw the latter was not alone anymore.

Black Orchid, donning a new magenta and black colored one-suit, stood tall and proud. Her face was covered with a long black mask.

"You have a Black Orchid in this world too?" Datura gritted her teeth together.

"It wouldn't be the best world if it didn't," Black Orchid flashed her a smirk.

"You should know I killed her too," Datura's eyes flashed a wicked magenta color not previously seen before.

And that was recorded by both the Tempest and Black Orchid. STAR Labs wanted every angle covered in order to use it against Datura later on.

"You're going down just like her," Datura's voice overlapped with that of a woman's. Purple vines wrapped around her arms as she raised them to fire strong, magenta bolts. At least, they looked like bolts.

Black Orchid's eyes widened before she jumped out of the way. As each of the magenta 'bolts' landed, they spread around.

"What is that?" Nina blinked in horror as she watched it suck the color off the ground it was spreading on.

"Chloroplast," Black Orchid swallowed hard and shot Datura a glare.

Datura just smirked. She raised her hands in an 'I've got more' motion. Black Orchid charged towards her, forgetting her fears for a moment. Datura welcomed her with a series of more chloroplast bolts that Black Orchid would just barely dodge.

"Hey Nina, get Belén and Barry," Cisco's voice instructed from their comms.

"Yeah, I'll get them," Nina nodded and turned for her friends lying unconsciously on their beds. She flew towards them only to be shot down with a vine. Her face hit the ground first, making sure to warn Nina she'd have bruises later on.

"You're not touching them," Poison Ivy was back in the game and was angrier than ever.

With a groan, Nina turned flat on her back. She drew one leg up as if she were going to sit up but instead pushed it forwards to release another blast of air. It rocked Poison Ivy back, despite her efforts to stay still, and gave Nina the chance to get up.

"Where'd they fish you out from, huh?" Datura threw her best punch across Black Orchid's face. She smirked as she watched Black Orchid rub her cheek.

Course her smugness was part of her problem.

Black Orchid swung back then shoved Datura down. "You're one confident bitch, but that's going to be your downfall."

Now it was Datura's turn to rub her chin, and when she did she felt drips of blood from her upper lip. With golden eyes she rose from the ground and delivered a series of electric bolts. "I can't be defeated, you idiot. I am literally invincible," she declared, once again with a second voice overlapping with her own.

Black Orchid might have been a tiny scared there. She retreated to hide behind a crate while Datura began firing the electric bolts. Meanwhile, the Tempest flew to avoid Poison Ivy's entangling vines.

"Nina, get Belén! And Barry!" Cisco exclaimed again.

"I am trying my best here!" the woman snapped.

"We know," Caitlin agreed, "But if you get them out of that coma, it'll be a lot easier to take Datura and Poison Ivy down."

Nina stopped flying all of a sudden and whirled around. Another vine was coming for her so she twirled in the air and forced the vine in a different direction. She then created a miniature cyclone that she released straight for Poison Ivy. The ginger hadn't been expecting that for sure.

There was a clear satisfaction in Nina's face when she heard Poison Ivy's garbled screams. She flew back towards Belén and Barry and landed between their beds. "I have no idea what to do here. Do I just pull the wires off their faces or…?"

"Yes!" went both Cisco and Caitlin.

With a shrug, Nina yanked the wires off Belén's face first. As soon as they were off her skin, Belén awoke with a sharp gasp. She sat upright on instinct with wide, blinking eyes.

"Barry!" she cried horrifically.

"You're fine!" Nina put her hands on Belén's shoulders. "Belén, listen, you're fine! It wasn't real!"

Belén breathed heavily as reality set around her. "I was - I was…" she couldn't even come up with the right words to describe the horrific events she experienced.

"You're good," Nina offered her a smile. "Datura put you in a dream world where she controlled everything."

"Barry died…" Belén swallowed hard, almost crying there and then.

"But he didn't!" Nina moved aside and showed her that Barry was safe (in what fit anyways) and lying next to them. "He's right here. He's in a dream world too."

"Barry!" Belén bolted from her bed, ignoring the fact or feet were a little wobbly, and rushed up to Barry's side. Her eyes looked over the wires attached to his face and without hesitation she ripped them right off.

Like her, Barry woke up gasping and sat upright with the same horrific face. "Belén!" he screamed but Belén grabbed his face and turned his head to her.

"I'm here! It's me!"

Barry quickly looked her over and since he saw her back in her suit and it with no blood on her, he knew this had to be the real world. "Oh my God," he pulled her into a tight hug. "You died…"

"So did you," she choked the words out. She couldn't possibly hug him tighter and yet she needed to be closer to him. "You died saving me and I - I couldn't save you. I-I didn't have my powers and I…"

"I know," Barry kissed her head. "I didn't have my powers either."

"Sounds like Datura put you through hell," Nina's voice drew them apart for a moment. "Might I suggest a little revenge?" She made a gesture to the scene in front of them.

Datura was firing at Black Orchid with silver laser beams.

Belén didn't need to be asked twice. For once, she didn't care about the logics. She only wanted pain. Her skin started turning green and scaley, quicker than it ever had before.

"Datura," She darkly muttered and marched forwards.

"This might not be the best way to fight…" Barry trailed off when he knew Belén wouldn't stop to think about it. If she had gone through something similar to what he had, there was no way in hell she would stop until Datura was down.

Black Orchid's feet we're scraping against the cement as she was being forced back with the beams being shot at her. She didn't know she was about to have backup from the person she was meant to be saving. Belén swing a vine like a lasso and smacked it against Datura's side. Before the Earth 2 metahuman could realize what hit her, Belén struck down another vine that hit Datura right on her face. Needless to say it left several deep, open wounds.

Poison Ivy had finally detangled herself from the cyclone the Tempest sent her way and caught sight of what the Azalea had done to her partner. Just as she was about to run towards them, the Flash zipped up in front of her.

"I don't think so," he shook his head at her.

Poison Ivy's lips curled into a snarl. This plan was about to blow up in their face and of course Datura wouldn't see it because of her rage. She needed to get them out of there now.

Belén had jumped on Datura and punched her consecutively. "You made me think he was dead! I couldn't save him and it was all just some game to you!?"

Datura grabbed Belén's arms and butted heads with her. When Belén hit the ground, Datura paid her with the same coin and jumped on her to punch her. "It was my own personal nightmare just for you! Because I want you to know that I am in control of your life. And that your life...it's going to shatter into pieces like mine did. Only yours will end with your death."

"Get off of her!" Black Orchid kicked Datura's in the face and sent the meta back.

Soon as Poison Ivy meant to act, Barry did too. He swung an arm to stop her but she ducked. She retaliated by sliding a leg underneath and knocking him down. From above, Nina delivered new air blasts. While Poison Ivy struggled to stay on her feet, Barry got back up and started running in a circle as fast as he could.

Poison Ivy knew exactly what that meant. "Datura, we gotta get out of here!"

"No!" her partner screamed. She was facing off Belén and Shivhan with everything she had. Red energy just narrowly missed Shivhan's arm. Electric bolts could have almost fried Belén's left leg.

Belén did her best to keep up her front. She threw her own Chloroplasts, though without the sucking-energy part since she didn't yet own that ability. One of them did catch Datura's leg and it angered her. More fiercely than ever Datura's eyes glowed an orange hue before releasing lasers. Black Orchid swooped in front of Belén and raised tendrils of magenta vines as a shield for them both.

"Datura, LET'S GO!" Poison Ivy furiously shouted. She could see the paleness in her partner's face even from where she was. Datura was over exerting herself all over again. "We need -" her scream echoed in the room when Barry's thunder bolt struck her square in the chest. Her body crashed against the wall, falling over.

Datura suspended her fight and saw where her partner had landed. "No!" The orange hue disappeared from her face. She dashed towards Poison Ivy and without glancing back at the group, Datura vanished with her altogether with an electronic zap.

~0~

Caitlin conducted thorough mental examinations for Belén and Barry the moment they got back. She wanted to be 110% sure that neither were in any harm thanks to Datura.

"It doesn't look like either of you have any residual energy from that machine you were strapped to," Caitlin was happy to report after two hours of exams.

There was a mutual relief amongst the metas as well as the rest of the group crowding their room.

"How'd this even happen to you?" Iris asked the two in question.

Belén exchanged a glance with Barry, neither seeming to sure of their timing. "I was just...I was outside, moping I guess, when I saw this hue of energy at a distance," Belén explained first. "I thought it was Datura so I followed it and it brought me downtown where sure enough she was there. I fought her until she told me she had Barry."

"So you just let her take you?" Barry frowned at her. "Belén-"

She raised her hand to stop whatever he was going to say. "I figured she'd wake me up when we were at her lair or something and then we could escape together."

"But she didn't," Veronica spat. Out of the entire group, she was the only one who looked mad.

"Mom—"

"What are you going to tell me, Belén!? Look at yourself!" Veronica made a gesture at Belén's current appearance.

She had a few bruises on her face, as well as the imprint of the electrodes that had been stuck to her face. There was a cut on her lower lip, but to be honest...Belén felt physically fine. Her mentality, however, was another story.

"You need to stop all this nonsense before you get yourself killed!"

Barry gulped when he remembered his personal nightmare.

"Are you kidding me?" Belén hopped off the bed to face her mother. "Today more than ever proved I need to stop Datura. If I don't fight her, she'll come after anyone and do anything she can to hurt them. She's a danger—"

"That is going to get you KILLED!" Veronica frantically shouted with her entire body practically shaking. For a moment, the others sympathized with her (especially Joe). "Don't you see that!? She could have killed you today, Belén! You were at her mercy! You don't always get lucky Annah-Belén!" She looked around to see if anyone would back her up, or even if Belén would give in.

But she didn't. Belén just gave a small shake of her head.

"Fine," Veronica whispered. "But I will not be here to watch you get yourself killed." She stormed out of the room and the cortex altogether, just barely avoiding Shivhan coming the opposite way.

"You know," Joe spoke up after a few seconds, "Not to side with her, but...I see what she means as a parent."

"I know," Belén sighed, but he shook his head at her.

"No, you don't. None of you do because you're not parents. It's hard watching you-" Joe pointed at Barry, "-go out there, not knowing if you'll come back. I haven't had the misfortune of losing you or Iris, so I can't imagine what Veronica must feel knowing that she lost two of her kids to this metahuman world."

"I'm not saying she's wrong," Belén folded her arms, "But it's not like I'm going to listen to her and stay away. She needs to understand it's my choice and right now, I'm choosing to fight Datura."

"Not today you're not," Cisco pointed at her and even Barry. "You two need to get some rest because those nightmares could not have been easy. Now I've already put a new tracker for your suit Bells but you can take it easy."

"What if she comes back?" Shivhan spoke up for the first time since she joined the group.

"They won't," Barry assured her. "They're back on Earth 2."

"How'd this disappear?" Shivhan then asked when she remembered the odd electronic zap she'd witnessed.

"I think it's a gadget or something..."

"A dimension-teleporter," Harry corrected. "On my world, there's a meta who can...cross dimensions. Reverb. It's well known that he and Datura are pretty...close. He must have created the device and fused his powers with it."

"Well, that's lovely. Give the siphoner the ability to cross dimensions too," Iris sourly said. "It's not like she's deceiving, intelligent, powerful..."

Belén scoffed. "Where is the fairness in that? Do you know how hard it is to fight her? It's like every time I have her, she's one step ahead of me. Whatever I throw at her, she expects it. I don't know how she does that."

"And she's very good at creating nightmares," Barry hated to admit. "She got every aspect of our world right. Like...how would she know that I worked at my lab? That Belén's favorite color is pink because it's from Azaleas. The only thing she got wrong was that Belén is not a crazy sleeper and that she works as a reporter, not a botany scientist."

"Of course," Belén agreed with a small frown. "I barely move when I sleep and I don't know the first thing about botany science."

Something in Harry's mind started working as he thought about these small details no one was probably paying attention to.

"But you're kind of right," Belén said a moment after thinking of her own world. "She got you working at your lab, the Barry from my world knew I liked planting Azaleas in our yard."

Something snapped inside Harry's brain. 'It's like every time I have her, she's one step ahead of me.' He turned away from the group, his feet moving slowly in the beginning. 'Whatever I throw at her, she expects it.' His feet picked up his pace and before he knew it, he was leaving STAR Labs.

~ 0 ~

"Thanks for coming to help," Belén stood in front of Shivhan. The cortex was empty now except for them two. Before leaving, Cisco and Caitlin had informed Belén what led Shivhan to decide to help them. Belén felt like an apology was very much due here.

Shivhan had neatly folded her new suit and left it on top of the desk. "Yeah, well, I was chipped so..."

"You weren't," Belén awkwardly smiled at her. "It was just a lie so you would help us. Sorry about that. And...I'm sorry for kidnapping you. I was a bit desperate."

"And now I know why," Shivhan sighed. "I heard the stories about this Datura. I actually read your articles about her before any of this. I thought if I kept myself hidden, she wouldn't hurt me. But then there were robberies here and there, and people getting hurt...I couldn't stay away. One month was actually my longest hiding period."

"I'm sorry," Belén shook her head. "I swear I will make her go away so you and everyone else can feel safe again."

"Yeah," Shivhan nodded, "And I'm going to help you however I can. Starting with the Green."

Belén blinked. "What?"

Shivhan smiled, borderlining a smirk. "That bitch Datura is so confident I wanna wipe that smugness right off her masked face."

A small smile spread across Belén's face. "Really? Even after I kidnapped you?"

"Bold move. Kinda like you better for it."

"Oh my God, thank you!" Belén hugged her excitedly, though the bouncing was not something Shivhan was there for. She was a bit taller than Belén so it felt like she was hugging a child.

"Yeah...okay," Shivhan detached herself from Belén. "I'm not into hugs that much. So if I'm staying...does that mean Cisco will make my new suit better?" Belén nodded. "Awesome!"

"Bells?" Barry came into the cortex, though slowly in case the two women weren't finishing talking.

"I guess I will see you tomorrow to start training," Shivhan pointed at Belén then swiped her suit off the desk, keeping it nicely tucked between her arms.

"Wait, what?" Barry's clueless expression followed her as she walked towards the corridor. "You're staying?"

"Yup! See you tomorrow, new buddies!" she winked at them then disappeared.

"Something tells me she's going to be an interesting one," Belén said after a moment's thought.

Barry smiled at her, happy to see she was finally going to get the help she wanted. "You want to go home, then?"

"Yeah..." Belén sighed and glanced back at her suit on display. "It's not like she'll be showing up anytime soon. She got quite her game today. I can't believe we fell for her trap. How did she draw you in, though?"

"She had your suit's tracker, making us think you were there at the warehouse. I went to look for you there and instead I got Poison Ivy," Barry scowled. He still couldn't believe he hadn't seen the ginger coming for him.

"...what was your world like?" Belén asked after a moment. She side-glanced him with an expression indicating he didn't have to share if he didn't want to.

But instead, Barry agreed to answer once they were safe at home in the comfort of each other. He took them to her apartment where they found a spot on the couch. There they told each other what Datura had forced them to dream of; how their perfect worlds turned into nightmares with each other's deaths.

"I didn't have powers so I couldn't save you," Barry held Belén close when he remembered the bullets and the blood from her dream's counterpart. "And then you were gone...with the baby."

Belén snuggled to his chest. "Our baby? I'm sorry she made that happen." She felt her face warm up just thinking about the fact her other self had been 'pregnant' with their child. Of course, it was the same thing when she told Barry about her world where they were just a week from being married.

"I'm sorry she made your nightmare happen," Barry kissed the top of her head. "But you know that I would save you no matter what."

"Your death wouldn't be saving me, idiot," she looked up at him. "So don't you ever get that idea in your head. We either survive together or we die together. That's it."

Her hands found his face and as she stroked soft circles on his skin, they rested foreheads with each other. Eventually, they kissed. And because of the terror they lived, there was a lot to kiss for. Neither would say it then, but their kisses had changed into something deeper. Perhaps it was because of what they'd seen and gone through, or maybe it was the fact they were aware of what the future could hold for them if they wanted it.

~ 0 ~

A breach whirled into existence on Earth 1, allowing Datura to cross over. Soon as she touched ground, she saw Harry standing across.

"First time you summon me," the metahuman folded her arms. "Can I expect Belén's body behind you?"

"I know who you are," Harry went straight for the point. He'd been thinking this over for a few hours now and he couldn't be more sure of it. It all made sense. It was actually so stupid that he hadn't seen it from the very start.

Datura had a laugh. "Of course you do."

"I do," Harry reiterated with a sharpness that silenced Datura. He started taking slow steps towards her while he explained his conclusion. "It's been staring us right in the face and we missed it. I missed it," he put a hand on his chest, exhibiting true offence with himself that he had been so clueless. "Belén's been saying it over and over. You're always one step ahead of her, one step ahead of Barry. You're evenly matched against Belén. Every punch she throws, you expect it and have one better. Even from the very start. You knew who the Azalea was. You knew who the Flash was. You knew all these details about Belén, like what her favorite color was. It wasn't because you did your research. You just knew. And how would you know them? How could you always be one step ahead of Belén?" Harry stopped right in front of Datura, looking her (for the first time since he had the misfortune of meeting her) directly in her dark, chocolate brown eyes. Despite her position, Datura's red lips were quirking into a smirk. Harry remained emotionless, yet still confident he knew what was going on. "You know everything because you are Belén."

The smirk on Datura turned into outright smugness. She brought one of her gloved hands to her mask and carefully pulled it off her face. "Took you long enough." Earth 2 Belén Palayta looked exactly the same as her Earth 1 doppelganger, only she owned a darkness no other doppelganger could match.

Author's Note:

BAM. I've been waiting to reveal that one ever since Datura was first introduced! I originally had it planned to be revealed earlier but I felt like it fit better here. So, did anyone see that coming? It's literally foreshadowed in the story cover page. Hope y'all paid attention to it!

And a lovely little fun fact here: one of the girl names dream-Belén listed is the actual name I'm giving to hers and Barry's daughter in a for their season 5 rewrite. Can you guess which one it was??

[noddytheornithopod]

Okay, now that I’ve gotten all the Bad Batch controversies out of the way... I can finally talk about the actual damn episode properly.

Like I said on my whitewashing post, overall I liked it, but I am kinda hesitant for reasons I explained there. I now want to focus on the actual story itself on its terms, and see how I feel about that. Apologies if I jump all over the place.

Probably my biggest issue narrative wise was that I felt some of the stuff around Crosshair was a bit contrived. Like, I was fine with him going full GOOD SOLDIERS FOLLOW ORDERS and all that, my issue is that I feel like the others took a while to realise he was following Order 66. Like, Tech even says he can’t be certain their mutations entirely screwed up their programming, with the camera even cutting to Crosshair. And like, before that Crosshair is berating Hunter for letting Caleb escape. When Tech said what he did, I feel like Hunter should’ve probably said something like “that must be why Crosshair tried to kill the Jedi”. Granted, it probably would’ve then led to questions like why Crosshair’s genetics let his chip work and not the others (something that isn’t answered, but it’s not something I felt that needed to, different genetics affect things in different ways we can’t always predict), but like, when they’re on Onderon and Crosshair’s like “yeah let’s shoot literal child refugees”, I feel like they shouldn’t have just conflicted with him, they should’ve outright wondered if he was falling for his programming. It doesn’t break the episode for me and I guess they probably just assumed Crosshair was being his usual dickish self, but I guess that also is a reminder that this is the second time we’ve seen him, so we don’t know if he’d normally be up for killing innocents if a mission requires it (since TBB are still given missions, their thing is they just do them the wrong way). It’s just like, you’d think at least Tech would make some comment about it. As Saw said, he’s supposed to be the smart one lol.

On the topic of inhibitor chips, I was surprised that Crosshair’s was only partly working. I guess it’s because he still had a level of personality to him? The more you know, I guess.

I do think the Bad Batch work better here as many have said, I guess probably because they’re the focus of the story so they have more room to show who they are and nuances to that. My favourite is probably Tech, I tend to gravitate to the nerd characters in things. Shame he has to look so fucking white for being a clone of a brown man though. :/ Kinda like Wrecker too, even with the issues HE has too. Great, even in my main comments my issues with them are popping up. :v

On that note... I do appreciate the idea behind the Bad Batch, being clones who turned out different and it’s about accepting and embracing your differences. It’s just in execution, it’s a bit of a mixed bag. Like, it could be a commentary on things like ableism, but thing is, these characters are basically superpowered (if people weren’t fixated on bashing women they don’t like and were equal in their vitriol, you could EASILY call the Bad Batch a bunch of Gary Stus). It’s one of those things where a sci-fi/fantasy allegory is well intentioned but because of things that don’t apply to our reality, the allegory kinda falls apart. Like yes, “be nice to people different to you” is one thing, but it does lowkey feel a bit like “they’re judged because they’re better than everyone else, those stinkin regs are just jealous”. Well no jealousy is shown in the episode, in fact a normal clone calls them defects... which is weird because even if yes TECHNICALLY they are, they’re basically presented as turning out different, but those differences are things that are beneficial to them, and not impairments. I guess I feel like the message would be stronger if they actually had major weaknesses, aka why they’re “defective”, but their strengths are something they excel at so much they’re allowed to serve (which I GUESS was the idea, but we don’t know what made them defective originally and what got their mutations enhanced). And yes, you can infer things like Wrecker being “dumb” (which has its own issues, and even then he’s still competent enough on a battlefield, honestly he might even be more just impatient and impulsive and thus can’t sit still to learn more complex things), but yeah. It’s kind of a mixed message here, I appreciate what they’re going for, but like many fictional allegories, it kinda falls apart and it’s also presented in a very individualistic way.

Okay let me say something positive: AZI-3 IS BACK! I assume he got memory wiped so he wouldn’t have any memory of Fives, but I really liked him in the Order 66 arc of The Clone Wars so I was happy to see him again. Well, until he was hit with that stun blast. I hope he’s okay and able to be repaired!

Echo’s attack with his probe arm thing is pretty cool. It was also cool seeing how he was integrating into the Bad Batch. I also theorised he was most likely to be immune to the inhibitor chip out of the group, because while I felt the Kaminoans wouldn’t overlook inhibitor chips in even mutated clones (they do explain that they kept them around because they were always successful at what they do despite their unorthodox tactics), I had a feeling that the Techno Union putting all those cybernetics in his head maybe screwed with or even removed the chips. Get the poor guy some skin colour though.

I have also seen some people bring up the potential issue of ableism with Echo given he’s an amputee with prosthetics, but I don’t have much to comment on in that regard. But yeah, using disabled bodies for shock value and it being seen as a measure of humanity like in The Bad Batch arc of TCW is a trope I could really do without.

I’m liking Omega so far. She’s definitely got a different vibe to other kid characters we’ve gotten in these shows, probably because she was raised on Kamino. Also appreciate that her voice actor is New Zealander too (she’s not Maori which would’ve been the ideal, but was born to Indonesian Chinese parents). Her curiosity makes a lot of sense, she’s not just mischievous because kid. Was nice to see Hunter open up to her too.

I’m intrigued to see where they take Crosshair. IDK why his genetics allowed his chip to still work, but it’s nice to see at least one of the Bad Batch follow Order 66. I guess they decided against it for more (as much as I’d liked to have seen it) because Order 66 doesn’t just make clones decide to kill Jedi, it basically removes any level of humanity and personality they may have developed and makes them basically stormtroopers. That, and well they want our heroes of the show to be the Bad Batch, and that can’t work if they’re now the goody two shoes batch.

On the topic of Crosshair, my favourite scene in the episode was actually when Omega talks to him. She tries to empathise with him, and whether she’s just naturally intuitive or is Force sensitive in some way, she can tell that Crosshair despite everything seems to be struggling, and it’s ultimately beyond his control that he’s like this now. And then he’s off to get his chip working at full capacity and is now a full on Imperial, RIP.

Also yeah, I’m on team “Omega is Force sensitive”. It’s possible she just has some heightened abilities because she’s an enhanced clone, but the way they framed her firing the blaster especially just screamed Force sensitivity to me.

On the topic of inhibitor chips, Crosshair proves that it’s possible to make them stronger, so it does potentially mean that if members of the Bad Batch are captured, their chips could be dialed up to make them loyal Imperials. I guess one could also wonder if they could be slow for the effects to come into play for some of them, so some maybe slowly turn later on? I doubt they will go that route because they probably want to keep all our heroes around, but it’s something, especially if they eventually conclude they have to remove their chips to be safe.

Seeing Saw in the first episode was surprising but also pretty cool, especially with how the model is transitioning from his Clone Wars appearance into Forrest Whittaker. Love how he sees right through Palpatine’s bullshit, especially when he makes that jab at Tech that seems to be a bit of a blow to his ego, lol. Some have wondered why he’s so chill here, but you have to remember this is early days Saw. He’s still cautious, but he’s not paranoid and overly violent. The way some of those refugees reacted to the clones does make it seem like there’s already Imperial forces occupying Onderon (well, they’re literally out in the forest at a camp). Mainly bring that up because I have to wonder how much time has passed, and how quickly Imperial forces showed up to Onderon.

Seeing Tarkin be a dick is always glorious. He just goes everywhere and KNOWS he’s in charge, lol. It was also interesting how even if he’s feeling like he’s ready to abandon clone forces, he sees potential with Clone Force 99 if they can follow Imperial doctrine.

The Kaminoans also seem distrustful of the Empire, not because they’re against it but because they want to keep their current deal. Maybe if Tarkin heard them out the Empire would have a better army, lol. Taun We from AOTC even cameoes. I do wonder what’s eventually going to happen though, given the clones are obviously abandoned in the end, I wonder how the Kaminoans are going to take it.

Also, Nala Se is back. Yeah, THAT Nala Se. Wonder what she’s doing with Omega as her medical assistant, lol. Oh yeah, she also stopped the doors and let the Bad Batch escape. I have no idea what she’s planning, but I feel like she’s being shady, given not only the Fives stuff but also because despite having a fondness for Omega she does seem like she’s very controlling of her (after all, she’s just property to her), hence why Omega wants to get out and be with the Bad Batch.

Okay, I think that’s everything I wanted to say? But yeah, have a lot of reservations, but still curious to see where this goes despite that.

[soveryanon]

Reviewing time for MAG129 /o/

    - Overall, I’m… so, so proud of Jon since the season has begun? He’s trying! Trying so much and so hard! And it’s still the same Jon who is prone to outbursts, who can say mean things… but now, he’s also learned that his actions and his words can be destructive, that they can hurt people, that he can hurt people he cares about simply because he voiced what he felt! It’s not so much that his snappiness disappeared; it’s more that he’s now able to quickly understand that it can have consequences and wound even when he didn’t mean to?

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: No, it’s fine, I know you’ve got… whatever this is, I’m not going to question you. MARTIN: Thank you. ARCHIVIST: [SPITTING] Even if it looks like you’re doing something really stupid. [SILENCE] … Sorry. MARTIN: It’s okay. I get it. ARCHIVIST: I just– I worry. […] [SIGHS] I suppo– … I miss you.

I mean!! Look at him!! He could compulse, has decided not to, and reassures that he won’t; he still snaps, but understand when he went too far and was actually demeaning; he explains his reasoning instead of clamming up! He caught himself when spurting one of his “I suppose”s and openly admitted something meaningful instead! Yes, alright, that should be basic, but that’s still a lot of progress and very impressive for someone who regularly fails to understand people around him, has trust issues, and used to go on the offensive when feeling cornered or criticised. (Would season1!Jon have behaved this way, uh?)

I’m also so fond of the way that Jon is once again… trying to make Martin talk? Restarting the conversation when the silences stretch out, talking about Martin? It’s horribly sad, but… the aesthetic of Jon trying to reach Martin feels so satisfying at the same time…

- I’m, however, a bit tad worried about how Jon sometimes flirts with becoming a The Eye apologist. 1°) He has been casually dropping a bit of an “us vs. them” mentality, lately, and it isn’t clear if it’s pure pragmatism (because they’re chained to the Institute) or Something Deeper:

(MAG123) BASIRA: [SIGHS] Alright. Best I can understand it, Beholding, or The Eye or… whatever you want to call it, we’re one of the only powers that hasn’t actually taken a shot at our ritual. Yet. And everything out there knows it. ARCHIVIST: … No, I mean, we… we can’t be the only ones, surely? BASIRA: I don’t know. Probably not. But we made a big noise with The Unknowing and… other stuff, and… now they’ve taken notice.

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: You’re working for someone… really bad! MARTIN: Yes, I’m not an idiot, Jon, but it’s no… worse than working for something really bad, so… ARCHIVIST: At least The Eye hasn’t gone after our own. Lukas has vanished two people!

“we”, “our own” can be neutral and coming from an objective fact (the Institute is still their workplace, it’s about their colleagues!), or from a strategic point of view, or… a deeper feeling of belonging. I’m not sure. I hope that Jon is aware of what he’s saying and that it’s not the latter option ;;

2°) Jonathan “The Eye Did Nothing Wrong” Sims, DO WE TALK ABOUT IT. Elias killed Gertrude and Leitner! He allowed Sasha to die! He manipulated and chained them to the Archives! He traumatized Melanie! Jon should know that even without knowing that he also traumatized Martin (which… yeah, is only one of the things Elias has done in a long list, but in this particular case, especially horrible: Jon telling MARTIN, of all people, that The Eye ISN’T HURTING THEIR OWN…). That’s a lot of harm against its own people, even without taking into consideration the few Beholding statements that have popped up, including Albrecht’s death two episodes ago? What the heck, Jon? (Melanie would stab you again for this.)

It actually sounds like, overall, Jon is equating Peter’s actions with the Lonely, while at the same time… totally separating Elias’s from Beholding? I don’t know if it’s Jon being casually hypocritical, personally biased, or if there is something behind that (Elias not being Beholding’s Best Avatar, after all?).

- I don’t know if Martin realizes how much what he says makes it sound like he’s being coerced into avoiding everyone in exchange for Peter not harming the staff any further, and like there is no bigger plan beyond that – like Martin is just a victim with everyone else being used as hostages?

(MAG129) MARTIN: Oh… … Okay? W–well, sorry, but I’ve… I, hum… ARCHIVIST: You have to leave. Suddenly. […] Lukas has vanished two people! MARTIN: Yeah, and if it wasn’t for me, it would’ve been a lot more. [SILENCE] This isn’t helping anything. […] ARCHIVIST: If–if you do need to talk, I– MARTIN: I can’t. ARCHIVIST: No. No, o–of course. [INHALE] Listen, Martin, you should know– MARTIN: Jon– ARCHIVIST: –Daisy might be alive, Basira is– MARTIN: Stop. Stop, please, I–I shouldn’t know any of this, I… [PACKING UP] I–I–I really need to go, I–I’m…

It’s never “I’m not interested” or “I don’t want to” – it’s always how about Martin can’t by obligation. However, the way Peter presented it in MAG126, Martin’s “isolation” is not the main goal: it’s a means to an end, since Martin agreed to all of this in order to stop the New Threat that Adelard was investigating. We know this. But from an external point of view, with just the glimpses of conversations Jon has had with Martin… Jon would have many reasons to think that there is no plan, no further motive for Martin, and that Peter is simply forcing Martin to do things while threatening everyone else? That… could actually make Jon worry even deeper, if Jon ends up thinking that Martin is not even working on something, but only coerced into not having any contact with the others because Peter is messing with him?

(It’s possible, and even likely, that Peter’s agenda actually involves a lot more than what he’s told Martin: that this is also a way to separate the team that had managed to defeat Elias, and/or to give Jon a taste of the Lonely, and/or to deprive Jon of potential anchors, and/or to keep using Elias’s “learn to fly by falling” approach to force him to develop his powers in a semi-hostile territory, and/or to prevent Martin and the assistants from meddling with The Lonely’s or Beholding’s plans… But I’m still a bit hopeful that Peter didn’t completely bullshit Martin about the New Threat as a cover for other reasons – that it’s still, indeed, an actual thing that will need taking care of? Martin is wary of him, that’s good; I don’t think that he sees Peter as trustworthy, and he’s probably expecting backstabbing or a twist before the end. But there would be something… really pathetic if there was actually no New Threat and that Martin had been roped into a series of lies, without managing to achieve anything. So many things have already been pathetic in Martin’s life (his one-sided crush, the fact that he doesn’t seem to be close to a lot of people even outside of the Institute since nobody had checked on him during the Prentiss siege, the fact that he sacrificed his whole life for a mother who hates him because he physically looks like his father), it would be… very heartbreaking to add more to the list with this;;

- I’m so relieved that Martin is aware of and acknowledging Peter’s sketchiness very naturally ;; 1°) And on the subject of Beholding being no better than a Lukas: Martin is not wrong, technically? Beholding is one of the Fears – it’s not a ~good~ option either, it has never been? The fact that they used to accumulate, read/record and archive statements can’t be good on the long run if it’s serving It? Maybe even preparing The Watcher’s Crown? Martin himself used to be a bit complacent about the work in the Archives (even post-reveal in MAG092), while Tim was the one to constantly remind the others that the Institute was bad, too:

(MAG098) MARTIN: [Elias] did suggest I try to get you involved and– TIM: And I suggest that he not be a scary, magic psychopath. … Whoops! Too late. MARTIN: … Yeah. TIM: [SIGHS] Sorry. MARTIN: No, I– I get it. Heh. They’re not exactly much fun. TIM: Look, it’s not that. I… [SIGHS] This place is evil, Martin. And I think doing what It wants? Probably makes us evil. And It wants those things to be read. I mean, I’m not going to stop you, but, at the same time… MARTIN: I– I get it.

Martin never really fought or tried to escape the archival work, but he’s aware enough to point out that it’s not a Good Option vs. A New Bad Option (which would be Peter); they’re all… bad.

2°) First there was Martin’s stern “Peter.” in MAG126 that just made Peter stop trash-talking Jon, now the mention that Martin is ensuring that no more staff members get wooshed into the Lonely… Martin has an iron grip on Peter, uh.

3°) Martin feared that he could be perceived and described as “Martin Blackwood: he was always scared, then he died. The end.” BUT SERIOUSLY. If he dies (and if there is a body), put “I’m not an idiot, Jon.” on his gravestone.

(- I’m ;; still hoping that those two researchers are aliiiive and that they’ll be able to get out from the Lonely. I mean. They resisted against the shady new management and against orders from a boss who 1°) is apparently incompetent at the job since he delegates all his tasks to an assistant, 2°) was probably chosen for reasons having to do with his privileged background, 3°) didn’t allow them to see him even once since he arrived, and yet had Ideas about how to rule the place. You’re brave, researchers! Fight against the system!! You don’t deserve to die for this!!)

-When listening to MAG129’s statement, I was a bit lost and went back and forth between many guesses as to which power was at work. I was expecting a Buried one from the title, but then, discovering to the statement itself, I kept wondering if it wasn’t something else: Corruption, since there was the sense of decay and the disgust when Kulbir went to the firm’s building? Dark, with the lights slowly fading out? Lonely, since everyone seemed to have disappeared? Vast, with the sky joining in that mess? Still Buried, since the firm used awful puns that sounded very Buried? I think I was just a bit surprised to see the Buried associated with water, of all things, despite the fact that it was nothing new in (what-we-assume-to-be-)Buried statements: MAG015 (cave diving), MAG088 (with the “DIG” book found on the beach)… Which makes sense considering what drowning is about? But because of MAG051 (“High Pressure”; hi Simon), I had come to naturally associate water=ocean=Vast, which I feel a bit stupid about since it’s obviously not how The Fears work; it’s not about elements or symbols but what they do to you. Still: I had that moment of “Oh? … Oh, right!!” during MAG129. It’s… a bit more obvious when relistening, given Kulbir’s main concerns and how the world shifted around him:

(MAG129, Kulbir Shakya) “but by that point, I was already too deep in debt and there was just… no way I was going to be able to stay. […] I felt… disgust rise in my throat, the awful, humid air of the waterlogged place sitting heavy in my lungs. […] The water was warm, and after the heat of the summer’s day, I breathed in, expecting the smell of petrichor. But the scent of the rain was something else – something earthy and cloying I couldn’t quite place. […] I tried to relax, to let the rhythmic tapping of the rain lull me off to sleep, like it always had when I was a boy. But I could find no comfort in it. It sounded too much like it wanted to get in. […] I was tired, I was hungry and, without the motion of the rain, the air had become intolerably humid. Every breath I took filled my lungs with that thick, wet scent, and it felt like I could barely get enough oxygen to think. The walls of my house were slick with moisture now, and there was nowhere I could go to be dry, no way out of this oppressive, cloying damp. […] Inch by inch, foot by foot, everything was descending into the water’s embrace. It would wrap itself around me, reach down my throat and fill me with its choking darkness. There was nothing I could do.

Aaaand obviously, given the many double-entendre opportunities revolving around “crushing debts”, of course The Buried would be targeting poor people feeling ~pressured~, anxious about their situation.

(MAG129, Kulbir Shakya) “The first words did nothing to dissuade me from my assumption it was junk mail: “Drowning in debts? We can help!” in big friendly text that seemed at odds with the pseudo-respectable image the rest of it seemed to be striving for. […] At the bottom, in that same friendly typeface, it assured me: “We can help with the pressure.” I don’t know what I expected. I really don’t.”

(It feels, more and more, like Puns are a way to get More Powerful when you’re serving an evil power. Only One True Fear: Puns.) Interestingly: it was also the case for Jackson Ellis in MAG097… but his dire situation got alleviated a bit after he had moved in in Bucoda:

(MAG097, Jackson Ellis) “My parents were dirt poor themselves, and couldn’t help. […] The forest pressed in on all sides, like it did everywhere in the Pacific Northwest, I suppose, but it was an effect I was struggling to get used to. […] As it turned out my situation wasn’t quite as dreadful as I thought. I discovered the next day that my work had actually paid me a small amount. It wasn’t clear whether it was meant to be salary or severance, and I couldn’t get through to anyone who might have been able to explain it, but it was enough to ease the relentless pressure, if only a little bit.”

Was it thanks to the fact that his situation got better than Jackson wasn’t entranced by The Pit like all the other residents?

- This wasn’t the first time that people escape through a near-death (or death?) experience: Antonia Hayley (MAG051, Vast), Carter Chilcott (MAG057, Lonely) were prime examples:

(MAG051, Antonia Hayley) “I should be dead, really. It’s a weird feeling. You ever had a near-death experience? I’ve had a few – they’re not uncommon in my line of work, but this… it feels different. It’s not like I put myself in danger and managed not to die; I should be dead. Decompression sickness that severe is almost never survivable, and I should have had an embolism. The fact that I didn’t… blind luck. It’s hard to reconcile yourself with avoiding of a death you feel… should have been yours.”

(MAG057, Carter Chilcott) “[…] I began to very seriously consider the idea… that I had died, and this was hell. Given that worry, the way I finally escaped could be considered ironic: I starved myself to death. Well, not to death, I suppose, given I’m alive enough to talk to you, but close enough. […] After everything else, I had no guarantee it was even possible for me to die, but I had to try. When I finally faded from consciousness, for what I hoped was the last time, it was the greatest relief I have ever felt. … I don’t… know exactly when I realized I wasn’t dead. There were various moments I… faded back into consciousness, and I know that I felt the re-entry, very hard, but it’s difficult to pin down clear thoughts before the hospital.”

(MAG129, Kulbir Shakya) “I don’t know if you’ve ever drowned, but it’s the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced. I tried to remain calm, to think of my grandfather and his firm, stony face […] My lungs spasmed painfully, desperately trying to wring air out of the warm, rancid water that filled them. And as I felt the water embrace me, fully pressing in on all sides… I gripped the last connection I had to the world I knew. The last thing I was conscious of… was the water getting colder. I don’t… remember them fishing me out of Regent’s Canal. Or most of my treatment, to be honest. At a certain point it all blurs together. I’m alive. And that’s what matters.”

I remember that Jonny more or less said that it’s impossible to truly understand how the Fears operate, given how they’ll always escape our rationalizations – but anyway: I get the impression that when they’re going all out, they kind of trap people in a reflected reality, and when people manage to escape them, they get spat out and back into our world? We had multiple witnesses whose testimonies didn’t match the official findings of later investigations, and it’s hard to tell who is lying and who is telling the truth: is the Police twisting some information in their official records since they’re alluding to Section’d events? Are the witnesses mixing up some details because their memory is at fault? When spook happens, there often seems to be two realities: and sometimes, there is no difference between the two; sometimes… something happened in one and had other consequences in the other (I mostly remember how the guy in MAG072 got his fingers cut yet they were still on his hand when everything stopped, though he saw his fingers cut with his ring on one of them, ring that he didn’t have on “his” finger anymore).

Here, Kulbir both got to “die” (or almost? or died for real?) and to hold on to an anchor (an item symbolizing someone that he loved):

(MAG129, Kulbir Shakya) “I could feel that warm, grasping water cover my feet, my ankles, slowly working its way up my calves, but at that moment, all I could think about… was my grandfather. And how he had looked when they had given him his diagnosis, calm and solid. […] He had always endured his problems, never tried to squirm out of things he felt he had to face. I gripped the sheath in both my hands and waded to the window. Corpses floated by, slowly waving at me gently, their lifeless hands grey and bloated. I ignored them. And stepped out into the water. […] I gripped the last connection I had to the world I knew.”

Which is something we’ve mostly seen in statements dealing with the Lonely, I felt? Naomi Herne heard her dead fiancé’s voice leading her out in MAG013, and Gerry had advised Andrea Nunis to think about her mother in MAG048 (which indeed allowed her to escape the anonymous crowd).

 - Regarding Kulbir’s grandfather: I wonder if he had a tie with something that was mentioned in MAG076, amongst the reports of William W. Hay about World War 2 dug up by Melanie?

(MAG076) “what I saw in the infirmary at Amritsar. Two dozen Ghurkhas tearing each other to pieces, consumed by the terrible butchery they had inflicted. Such things are not to be dwelt on, but serve to illustrate my proposition that violence, inflicted, received or even just witnessed, can not only deal injury to the body or the mind, but to the soul itself.”

The grandfather was specifically said to be a Ghurkha and brought back his weapon from it…

(MAG129, Kulbir Shakya) “We actually got into a… blazing row over his old kukri. He had been a Gorkhali, serving in the Fifth Gurkha Rifles during the Second World War. I have… complicated feelings on his military history, of course, but… he had always been fiercely proud of it. And that old knife had been one of his most treasured possessions. I didn’t keep it polished like he had, even at… ninety years old, but it reminded me of him. I could see his calloused hands on its hilt, as he meticulously, almost mechanically, cleaned it. Humming a tune the name of which I never learned.”

(Could have been Slaughter-infused, but I’m really not sure that it was even relevant here? What mattered was apparently the emotional connection.)

- ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; So that’s what happened to Jan Kilbride in the end (take that, myself, for sometimes daring to hope that he could have still been alive). We had heard Gertrude mentioning that she had Plans revolving around him back in MAG099 (recording from September 2nd, 2007):

(MAG099) GERTRUDE: […] For the Buried, however, I do have what I believe might be quite an effective plan forming – assuming, of course, that my suspicions about Jan Kilbride are correct, and that’s something that should be easy enough to determine once he’s back on Earth. Considering what’s probably happened to him up there already, I feel almost… bad, but there’s ten years yet before I can afford a conscience.

And Melanie had read Jan’s statement in MAG106 (left on February 10th, 2008) observing that the statement ended quite abruptly, and that Jan himself had disappeared from public views or records since coming back to Earth:

(MAG106) MELANIE: […] Also I, hum… I can’t find Jan Kilbride. He definitely returned. I’ve got more than one photograph of the trio’s arrival back on Earth, Carter Chilcott being attended by medical personnel, and the other two looking tired… but alive. There are also a couple of short newspapers stories mentioning their safe return. But it seems as though Kilbride made his way over to the Institute, a few weeks after touchdown, made his statement, and then… nothing. I can’t find any sign of him. And neither can Basira or Martin. Not on Earth, at least. I really don’t want to say he vanished into thin air but… he’s vanished into something.

Did Jan live in the tunnels for a while or something? He apparently managed to totally vanish from official records, and we know from MAG097 that the Buried’s “Sunken Sky” took place (or at least attempted to) on June 17th, 2008 – in Bucoda, America:

(MAG097, Jackson Ellis) “[…] [The pit] was bigger. And the road had swelled, to encompass it. There was someone else looking at it, though. An elderly woman, face pinched and thoughtful, stood at the edge looking down. I didn’t recognise her, or the car she stood next to. She definitely wasn’t from Bucoda. Sat in the car next to her, I could see a young man who had clearly been crying. I couldn’t get over how blue his eyes were… The old woman caught my eye, and looked from me, to the pit, and back again. I thought about saying something when she gestured for me to leave. And I did. I decided that I was no part of whatever was happening. So I drove away and didn’t look back. That night, the earthquake struck that destroyed Bucoda entirely, so I guess I’ll never know what was going on.”

Given that Jon mentioned that:

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: […] But I don’t want it. I don’t want to know. … I don’t want to see. … No more than I wanted to see how Gertrude stopped The Buried and their ritual, but that came to me as well. [HUFFS] They called it “Sunken Sky”! And she calculated, correctly, that casting a void-touched body down The Pit at the right time would be enough to disrupt it. Something she found in… Jan Kilbride. … But Gertrude also realized that the body need not be alive. Or in one piece. She thought it was a mercy. It wasn’t.

(Tim’s voice from MAG086: “Regarding a… blanket. Dead friend. Monster. Regarding his unavoidable and gruesome end. How he tried to hide. He couldn’t.”)

… it was apparently a gruesome end, and the tears might indicate that Jan knew what was coming. Gosh, the way Jon mentioned that it wasn’t a mercy… He got too much information about it, uh é_è

- *cough*

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: One thing that always strikes me when I read statements like this is… the bias of survivorship. With one or two notable exceptions, the only statements the Institute receives are those where the witness has… successfully escaped whatever terrible place or being has marked them for a victim. … I wonder how many don’t make it out. How many of those shapes in the water were once just like Mr Shakya. Hm.

1°) Yeah, without even counting the survivors describing how they witnessed someone dying or disappearing, we got a few statement-givers who flirted a bit too heavily with death (Nathaniel Thorp in MAG029), or were on the verge of turning into something else (Jane Prentiss in MAG033), or should be dead (Trevor), indeed. It happens. Also, Jon could add himself on the list, maybe, since he hasn’t managed to escape the Institute.

2°) I’m still so relieved every time Jon uses keywords indicating that he’s not perceiving the events these people go through neutrally – “terrible place or being” and “victim”. We saw a few monsters/avatars torturing people like it’s a game, but it is definitely not Jon’s case, and that’s a relief…

3°) ;; And it’s indeed a sad reminder that the only stories we get are from people who managed to get out (even if some of them met a gruesome end shortly after giving their statements, as we learn through the follow-ups), and that we can’t hear about the ones who were consumed/eaten alive/killed with no surviving witnesses… (Do you sometimes think about the fact that Jon gave that role to the tape recorder, in season 1 already? That he wanted to use it to chronicle what was happening in the Archives, to not become “another goddamn mystery”, because he didn’t want to end up like Gertrude or statement-givers? I wonder if Jon still thinks of a life after him and after the assistants, by now – if he still thinks it’s possible that maybe someone, one day, could find the tapes they left behind and reconstruct what they experienced. It doesn’t seem like the tape recorders are cooperating lately, though; they come and… go, and don’t allow people to hear what was said elsewhere.)

- I’m… intrigued by the fact that, so far, all of the things that Jon has suddenly Known (the leaks through the door) were information that had not been recorded on tapes – or, more precisely, that he hasn’t got any random outburst of Knowledge about things that have been recorded. Jon hasn’t mentioned anything about knowing that Basira had visited Elias (MAG127), nor about Martin’s conversation with Peter (MAG126), and we still haven’t heard any hint about whether or not he has listened to MAG118 and MAG120’s tapes; given how he gave his condolences to Martin about his mother, it’s more likely that he indeed still hasn’t been able to access MAG118’s. Are the tape recorders and the Spooky Magical Knowledge complementary things, or… actually competing against each other? (=> Does conversations getting recorded make them unavailable for Jon’s Spooky Powers?)

- Anyway: The Tape Recorder either liked Martin again, either knew that Jon was coming, since it clicked on in the room Martin was in before Jon entered.

- Where is MAG118’s taaaaape ;___; I’m pretty sure that Jon hasn’t consulted it since:

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: I, er… I heard about your mother. MARTIN: … Yeah. ARCHIVIST: I am… so sorry. [SILENCE] MARTIN: Thank you. [INHALE] It’s… [SHAKY EXHALE] It’s better, this way. ARCHIVIST: If–if you do need to talk, I– MARTIN: I can’t. ARCHIVIST: No. No, o–of course.

I feel like Jon would have said something… more, here, if he had heard that one? Giving his condolences neutrally like this feels like he still only knows Martin’s mother from what he learned in season 2: that Martin sends letters to her, that Martin dropped out of school when he was seventeen because he had to care for her and to sustain them since she got terribly sick. (And Martin’s “It’s better, this way” makes me hate Elias even more, since… it can mean that Martin thinks that it’s better if she’s not suffering anymore? Or… that he thinks that it’s pulling him out of an unhealthy situation, since she hated him anyway and he had built so much of his life around being able to support her – sacrificing his education, having to lie to get hired somewhere, getting hired in Spooky Dangerous Institute to get a salary. If Elias hadn’t said anything, Martin might have been able to keep deluding himself into thinking that she wasn’t good with him because of the sickness, because it can make people meaner to close ones witnessing their decay…? But no, Martin Knew The Truth when she died. Did Elias know, in MAG118, that she wouldn’t be living for much longer…?)

And am I a puddle on the floor at the fact that JON TOLD MARTIN THAT HE WAS THERE IF MARTIN NEEDED TO TALK ABOUT IT? Yes, I am a puddle of whimpering feelings on the floor. It’s… something that I would have never expected Jon to say. He usually offers his presences for spooky stories, not for… emotional support.

Jon

told martin

he would be there

for emotional support

I still have trouble letting that sink in.

- And!!!

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: … What happened, Martin? [SILENCE] MARTIN: You died. ARCHIVIST: I came back. MARTIN: Yeah. [OPENS DOOR] I’m not gonna let it happen again. ARCHIVIST: … wait… Wait! W– [DOOR CLOSES] [SIGHS]

1°) Is this the first time that Jon has acknowledged (implicitly, since he rolled with the mention) that his “coma” wasn’t exactly a coma? Unless he took that “You died” as an exaggeration. So far, it had been euphemisms (“dreaming” in MAG122, “coma” in MAG123, “when I was… away” in MAG126), so! Does he know that it wasn’t a normal coma by now? Or is he still unaware of it?

2°) Martin’s answer… ;__; Not “my mother died”, not “Tim died”, uh. We did hear Martin begging for Jon in the season teaser, and it didn’t sound like it was only because of his crush – they objectively needed help and the fact that Jon wasn’t there forced them to find alternative ways to deal with what they were facing (Melanie&Basira holed themselves up in the tunnels, Melanie defended the Archives against the Flesh attack, Martin reached an agreement with Peter to help him against a new issue). The fact that Jon “died” changed things, logistically. But it also sounds so personal, in Martin’s mouth (a bit bitter?), and once again, I’m remembering how he had lost all his deepest connections at that point: Sasha, Tim, Jon, his mother… and yet, he took the decision to work for Peter, and we know from the trailer that he checked if “they” (Basira and Melanie, and probably the Institute’s staff) would be safe. Martin ;__;

(Okay, I freaked out at first with Martin’s answer, because… “I’m not gonna let it happen again.”: was he referencing Jon COMING BACK FROM THE DEAD? But it was probably about Jon ~dying~ in the first place. Or about Jon finding him a third time. I hope so?!)

- I wonder if… if the situation had been different, if it had been Tim inside of the coffin, if there had been a chance to save him, and not Daisy… Would Martin have reacted differently?

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: No. No, o–of course. [INHALE] Listen, Martin, you should know– MARTIN: Jon– ARCHIVIST: –Daisy might be alive, Basira is– MARTIN: Stop. Stop, please, I–I shouldn’t know any of this, I… [PACKING UP] I–I–I really need to go, I–I’m… ARCHIVIST: Right. … right.

Martin didn’t like her much, but Tim… Tim was another story. Maybe that would have been enough to shatter the fragile equilibrium and to make him try to help with it, even while still working with Peter.

Even outside of “what if”… It’s ironic, because Jon tried to reach out by talking about people around them – barely mentioning himself (except when it came to his feelings over Martin’s work and busy state, and the quick mention of his powers at the beginning of the exchange): “Basira is off doing… God-knows-what, and I can’t talk to Melanie.”, “I, er… I heard about your mother.”, “If–if you do need to talk, I–”, “–Daisy might be alive, Basira is–” “What happened, Martin?”. And right now… it might actually have been more effective if Jon had behaved a bit more self-centred? Breekon sneaked into the Institute and could have harmed them: meaning that Peter won’t raise a finger if they’re attacked and that they’re probably more vulnerable than Martin thought. Jon’s powers are growing, now with an additional invasive dimension, and there is the risk of his inner door opening (and of him drowning). Even Melanie’s surgery: Jon was hurt! Mentioning that would have been enough for Martin to freak out, usually!

Conveying that Jon is at risk, that Jon could become a risk, could have made Martin reevaluate his priorities? Martin’s deal with Peter is based on the assumption that Jon and the others would be safe at the end; if they’re harmed and snatched by something else beforehand… it changes the configuration a bit.

(- BUT JON CHOSE TO PRIORITISE WHAT WAS HAPPENING TO THE OTHERS!!! HE TRIED TO INFODUMP TO MARTIN WHEN HE HIMSELF IS DEPRIVED OF ANY INFORMATION, BECAUSE MELANIE DOESN’T WANT TO TALK TO HIM, BASIRA IS FORBIDDING HIM TO “KNOW” ANYTHING ABOUT WHAT SHE’S DOING, AND MARTIN REFUSES TO SHARE ABOUT HIS OWN AGENDA WITH PETER!!!

I don’t know why, but this is… one of the aspects that punch my feelings the deepest? That Jon is desperately trying to share what is happening around him, to rebuild bridges, to avoid miscommunication or leaving others in ignorance? Because he has known first-hand, since the beginning of season 4, what it is like when nobody wants to share their plans with you? Because obviously, obviously we’re heading towards a Disaster if they don’t manage to unite what they’re doing and what they’re thinking, when there is so much at stake and when they have multiple potential ends of the world to thwart?)

- MAG126 confirmed that Martin is Concealing and very much feeling; that he’s forcing himself to pretend indifference. And yet, he still slipped from that self-inflicted behaviour at the beginning? (Highlighting that Peter is not his first evil boss?) And sounded like he panicked when Jon began infodumping?

;; I would like to be able to feel GLAD that Martin is showing some determination in the path he chose; he’s clearly not fine but also firmer and… hanging on to what he planned. And it surely feels, already, that he’s barreling head first towards complete disaster. Jon and Martin feel more and more that they will compete for the role of Most Self-Sacrificing Idiot in order to protect everyone, instead of working together…

- Given Peter’s reaction after Martin had barely talked with Jon:

(MAG126) PETER: You talked to him. MARTIN: I… I, I tried not to, I–I, I didn’t mean to… PETER: You talked to him. And that’s understandable, Martin, of course it is! Please don’t think I’m upset, it’s just… not ideal. Shows how much work we still have ahead of us. […] I had hoped that all this time apart would have given you the space you needed, but… MARTIN: … You said he’d probably never wake up. PETER: And he beat the odds. Which is good. But it does make things more complicated. It doesn’t… actually change… anything. MARTIN: A–a simple “hello” isn’t going to make any difference to– PETER: We’ve been over this. The sort of power you’re going to need relies on your– MARTIN: [SULKY] Obedience. PETER: Isolation. It needs to be you, Martin. You’re the only one who could possibly balance between the two.

… yeah, I’m not eager to hear what Peter thought about Martin and Jon talking again this time. I hope that Peter won’t ~generously offer~ a way for Martin to be completely out of Jon’ reach ;;

At the same time: really not sure that Peter’s (official) plan is working and that Martin is doing much progress? Yeah, he had it audibly rough, sounded bitterer and drier. But he doesn’t sound hollow or indifferent? He doesn’t sound like he’s in his natural state when forcing himself to be isolated? And after this conversation, I’m not sure that Martin will be able to do any progress Lonely-wise: I mean, if he had a crush on Jon back in season 1 already, when Jon was… like that, HOW could his heart remain still with current!Jon? When Jon is trying hard to share things and moments with him, when it’s Jon who seeks him out and wants to know what is happening in Martin’s life, when Jon apologizes spontaneously, when Jon is showing that Martin not being around him is hurting him? When Jon is showing so hard that he cares about him? I hope that Martin gets to stock up on these feelings to fight off the Lonely’s influence :|

- *crawls on the floor* everything hurts and I hate it and I’m loving it at the same time hhhhh…

(MAG053) MARTIN: [SIGHS] I just worry. You needed five stitches after you “accidentally” stabbed yourself with a breadknife. If you’re still claiming that’s what happened. ARCHIVIST: I am. MARTIN: Then you’ll forgive me for worrying when you use sharp knives.

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: Even if it looks like you’re doing something really stupid. [SILENCE] … Sorry. MARTIN: It’s okay. I get it. ARCHIVIST: I just– I worry. You’re working for someone… really bad!

OOOOOOH

(MAG126) MARTIN: … It’s because he’s back, isn’t it. [SIGHS] He’s back, so now you’re going to be… around, again. Listening in. Mff. You missed him, didn’t you. … Yeah. … [VERY SHARP SQUEAL OF DISTORTION] Yeah, me too.

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: [SIGHS] I suppo– … I miss you. MARTIN: [SNORT] ARCHIVIST: I’m just… MARTIN: Lonely. ARCHIVIST: [SIGHS] Yeah.

DID THE DYNAMIC

(MAG102) MARTIN: […] Look I’m, I’m so sorry, Jon, I– Elias didn’t even tell any of us that you’d been kidnapped– ARCHIVIST: Oh. MARTIN: –I didn’t know– ARCHIVIST: Hey– MARTIN: No-one else was telling me– ARCHIVIST: Hey, hey, hey… MARTIN: And there wasn’t any— ARCHIVIST: It’s alright, it’s alright. Elias didn’t tell anyone, there was, there was no way you could have known. I-I mean, I wasn’t exactly here before. MARTIN: No, you weren’t. … But I am sure that if you could have been, you would have.

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: I, er… I heard about your mother. MARTIN: … Yeah. ARCHIVIST: I am… so sorry. [SILENCE] MARTIN: Thank you.

FLIP AROUND…

Martin used to be the one worrying for Jon!! To think about Jon when he wasn’t there!!! To feel like he had let Jon down!!!! (When he apologized in MAG040 for leaving Jon and Tim behind, too… ;;) There are many reasons for Martin to be one of Jon’s concerns, indeed: concern, because he hasn’t been there for the past months. Guilt, because Martin is the last of the original assistants left alive. Worry, because the Lukases are not known to be harmless people. Defamiliarization, because Martin used to seek his presence rather than avoid him.

But Jon also sounds so sad, trying to connect with Martin again… His voice was still dragging and a bit brooding when he introduced the statement right after – Martin’s behaviour is leaving him miserable, uh…

- Jon agreed to not try to see Melanie, and sticks to it. He also accepted to try to not Know about Basira’s errands, and… unless he’s dissimulating it from the tape recorders, it looks like it has worked so far? (He hasn’t even opened the coffin!) (Yet.)

(MAG127) ARCHIVIST: I, er, I should probably… talk to h– BASIRA: You should probably stay as far away as possible. She doesn’t want to see you. ARCHIVIST: No. No, o–o–of course.

(MAG128) BASIRA: Right. [SILENCE] [INHALES] Right. Keep it safe, I’ll be gone a few days. I have some leads I need to follow up. ARCHIVIST: Sorry…?! BASIRA: You heard me. Don’t ask about them, and don’t know about them either. ARCHIVIST: I can’t exactly control that! BASIRA: Learn. […] I’ll try and be back in a week or two. Don’t think about me. ARCHIVIST: Right. BASIRA: And don’t open the coffin.

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: […] I haven’t heard from Basira, since she left on whatever secret errand, and I feel like I’m no closer to understanding any of this.

… I wonder if Jon will try to do what Martin asked of him:

(MAG129) MARTIN: Stop. Stop, please, I–I shouldn’t know any of this, I… [PACKING UP] I–I–I really need to go, I–I’m… ARCHIVIST: Right. … right. MARTIN: Please, stop finding me.

… or if, precisely, he’ll keep trying to see him. (Or if he will Know and… pretend he doesn’t.)

- Meanwhile, Jon’s powers are getting a bit out of control, uh… It’s, I think, the first time that Jon has expressed disgust at the idea of seeing/knowing things?

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: […] Or perhaps I shouldn’t wonder. [HUFFS] Even as I say it, I can feel the knowledge, pushing in my mind. Eager to find a way in. But I don’t want it. I don’t want to know. … I don’t want to see. … No more than I wanted to see how Gertrude stopped The Buried and their ritual, but that came to me as well. […] I don’t like this. I don’t like… not being sure what’s going to be in my mind. What thoughts are mine and what are from… elsewhere. Why I just know some statements are what I should be reading.

Jon’s complaint is the complete opposite of how Elias had described the Beholding folks! (MAG092: “We thrive on ceaseless watching, on knowing too much. What we face is the hidden, the uncanny, and the unknown.”) It looks like the knowledge of what happened to Jan Kilbride shook him pretty badly (it sounded… especially gruesome), and… indeed, Jon would fear losing himself with what is happening.

… So I’m really Not Impressed at him for suddenly forgetting his recriminations when he got the Knowledge of what he was supposed to understand from this statement. Is Beholding trying to appeal to Jon? Jon’s anxiousness and irritation totally disappeared right after he got the Additional Knowledge, so if it was the case… it worked. Jon, don’t be so easy!! It’s not because you’re getting the information you’d like to that it’s a good thing… ;;

- Okay, I’m probably granting too much consciousness and purpose to something that is supposedly (re)acting on instinct (“like a muscle spasming on reflex”, Jon had offered in MAG080) but.

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: […] I don’t like this. I don’t like… not being sure what’s going to be in my mind. What thoughts are mine and what are from… elsewhere. Why I just know some statements are what I should be reading. I assume this one is related to the coffin. To Daisy. … I haven’t heard from Basira, since she left on whatever secret errand, and I feel like I’m no closer to understanding any of this. … [SIGHS] I suppose if this one managed to free himself from The Buried or, to find a way out of… whatever part of Choke embraces drowning, I… [STATIC] I need an anchor.

It really sounded like Jon: i don’t know what to doooo, i have no direction, no idea… Beholding: *sends Jon towards a Relevant Statement* (●♡∀♡))ヾ☆*。 Jon: k thanks that’s a buried one, what’s the point of it then ¯\_ಠ_ಠ_/¯ Beholding: (ilu but you’re so slow, do I have to SPELL IT OUT) Σ(￣ロ￣lll) *sends static-y additional knowledge* Jon: oh– OOOOOOH.

To be fair with Jon, there were multiple things that I thought about when assuming that Jon had been directed towards this one (which was then implied to indeed be the case during his post-statement)?

* First: it’s a bit surprising that Jon is learning so much about the rituals that Gertrude managed to counter, considering Beholding’s is coming close? It’s like Jon is being given tips about how to possibly… ensure that Beholding’s won’t happen. We saw in MAG126 how Gertrude learned the location and some elements involved in the Spiral’s Great Twisting; and Jon apparently saw/felt/got first-hand knowledge about Gertrude’s reasoning, and what she did with (/to) Jan Kilbride in order to stop The Buried’s Sunken Sky ritual. I don’t know if there is a sort of intention in Jon’s outbursts of knowledge: if Beholding is simply answering Jon’s curiosity calls, or if it’s able to select what to give and hide from Jon. Giving information about Gertrude’s counter-rituals feels a bit dangerous considering how Jon’s loyalty to his patron isn’t… well, we’re still not 100% sure that Jon would be down for the Watcher’s Crown since he hasn’t specified anything in that regard (I mean, it seems obvious that Jon doesn’t want it to happen! And he’s probably remaining silent about it because it’s not safe to be a bit too openly antagonistic to your own patron in its place of power? But at the same time, Jon Made His Choice to be able to wake up, and we still don’t know what happened exactly.) On the other hand, there is… something to be said about how the two last Archivists weren’t exactly super into their own patron: Gertrude was actively working against it, Jon is maybe a bit more ambiguous (or at least passive) at the moment… is ot a Beholding thing to shoot yourself in the foot just to see what happens?!

* When I wondered about how this statement could tie in with the coffin, I thought about the rain, actually!

(MAG002, Joshua Gillespie) “It was a hard, heavy rain, the sort that falls straight down with no wind to disturb it, until everything is dark and wet. It was barely past midday, but I remember the sky was so overcast and gloomy that I had to get up to turn on the light. And that was when I heard it. […] It was almost… melodious. It sounded almost like singing, if it was muffled by twenty feet of hard-packed soil.

(MAG129, Kulbir Shakya) It started raining on the walk home. … When would you start to worry about the rain? I don’t mean about it ruining your day or wrecking an event you’re planning, but at what point does it stop being normal, and start to alarm you?

I thought it might be because reaching The Buried (or allowing The Buried to reach you) might be easier when it’s raining, or something of the sort?

* Orrr if the point might have been to tell Jon to ~dig~ into the “[Eberhart?] and Strauss” firm. (Not sure about the name, it was never mentioned before? One “Harry Eisenhard” had disappeared in MAG099’s statement, which was a Buried one, but it’s clearly not pronounced the same.)

* Or if it wasn’t something about needing to Face The Fears in order to find a way out.

* Or maybe it was Beholding telling Jon (to open the door and) to allow himself to get drowned, because it’s Inevitable anyway. (The whole anchor thing would be even more relevant given Jon’s situation! Give him reasons to care, give him safeguards able to tell him off if he slips!)

* tl;dr Can’t blame Jon for being too oblivious about what was supposed to be “the clue” in that statement, since I… didn’t bat an eye about “anchors” either – I mostly perceived them as a way to escape the Lonely specifically until now >>

- I’m!!! so happy that

(MAG099) ARCHIVIST: Is it… Why are you so insistent on keeping me around? GEORGIE: Because you’re trying to cut yourself off, and that’s… that’s really bad! Look, when’s the last time you spoke to someone who wasn’t me? ARCHIVIST: That’s… I… I–I talked to Martin a, a… a… a few weeks ago…? GEORGIE: Did you talk to him? Or did he talk to you, while you tried to find a way to escape? ARCHIVIST: I… uh… GEORGIE: Look, you’re worried. I get it. But if you really think you’re turning into something… inhuman, you need people around you. You need anchors. ARCHIVIST: All my “anchors” are just as deep in this as me. GEORGIE: Well, you still need them. ARCHIVIST: [SIGHS] Maybe you’re right. I… I’ll talk to the others. […]

Even if she’s not there, Georgie was right! “Anchor” was the word she used! ;w; (She was also the one to coin “avatar” before we learned that Gertrude also used it! Georgie is good at finding the right word when people are describing concepts!)

… Though it’s not a matter of stopping Jon from turning “inhuman” now ;; Elias had told Jon it was an irrelevant distinction back in MAG092 (“Jon, what does human even mean? I mean, really? You still bleed, you can still die. And your will is still your own, mostly. That’s more than can be said for a lot of the ‘real’ humans out there.”), Jon mentioned that he didn’t feel as heartless as he expected to with that development (MAG126: “I thought… moving away from my humanity would have made that seem more acceptable. That sort of sacrifice… but it just makes me sad…”), and it indeed feel like it’s not at the top of Jon’s fears anymore? (But he would still need anchors for this precise reason, probably ;;)

- Jonathan “I need an anchor!” Sims, why are you so relieved about that fact as if it were a helpful indication; must I remind you that

(MAG122) ARCHIVIST: Georgie, I– GEORGIE: Jon. If this really is a second chance… please, try to take it. But I don’t think that it is. ARCHIVIST: Georgie, I don’t und– GEORGIE: Take care of yourself.

nobody

(MAG127) ARCHIVIST: How’s Melanie? BASIRA: How do you think? ARCHIVIST: I, er, I should probably… talk to h– BASIRA: You should probably stay as far away as possible. She doesn’t want to see you. ARCHIVIST: No. No, o–o–of course.

currently

(MAG128) BASIRA: I’ll try and be back in a week or two. Don’t think about me. ARCHIVIST: Right.

wants

(MAG129) MARTIN: Stop. Stop, please, I–I shouldn’t know any of this, I… [PACKING UP] I–I–I really need to go, I–I’m… ARCHIVIST: Right. … right. MARTIN: Please, stop finding me.

to see or talk to you. I mean. Even friggin’ Elias, of all people, doesn’t want Jon to see him (for nebulous reasons):

(MAG127) BASIRA: [SIGHS] Fine. So you won’t see him, but you’re happy for him to hear our conversations. ELIAS: He can listen all he wants, but he’s at a very delicate stage right now, and I… fear my presence would be a… a distraction. I’ve made it clear my cooperation’s contingent on his not seeing me, and my terms have been accepted thus far.

Well. To be fair, Jon didn’t present it as the Solution – it’s a lead:

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: […] I need an anchor. I… I could go in… myself, I, I could find her. And… then, I just need to get out. I need something out here. Something I can know the way back to. I, I don’t know what. But… [HUFFS] It’s a start.

I don’t know what or whom he would be choose, though? Georgie elected to leave him to his own devices at the beginning of this season; Basira has repeatedly mentioned that she doesn’t trust him; Melanie is currently healing and not fine (and she didn’t like Jon even before getting tied down to the Institute). Even worse, for Basira: Elias made it pretty clear in MAG092 that if anyone is Daisy’s anchor, it’s Basira. And Basira presented Daisy in a similar way, too:

(MAG092) ELIAS: […] Should I, or the Institute, be destroyed, you will all, unfortunately, follow suit. […] And it would not be a pleasant death. DAISY: Bullshit! ELIAS: Then shoot me. Just squeeze the trigger, and watch the only person you care about die screaming. Your last connection to humanity. Do it. BASIRA: Daisy…

(MAG117) BASIRA: […] But at least Daisy’s coming along. I mean… I know she’s… difficult. Everything they say about her, it’s true, it’s fair. But… she’s solid. She’s a fixed point. And if she’s there, I know exactly where I stand, exactly what I’m doing relative to her. She has no doubts. […] Despite everything she’s done, she’s… she’s still the best partner I ever had.

(MMMMM, Elias’s line to Daisy is very close to Kulbir’s “I gripped the last connection I had to the world I knew”, isn’t it?)

Given Daisy and Basira’s relationship, and given how Jon presented the “anchor” as something that would help you to get out, it kind of excludes right away that Basira could potentially go inside to rescue Daisy; she would need her to remain outside of it in order to find her way back to her? Though, with how Basira managed to escape The Unknowing by herself in MAG119, and how she mentioned the events in MAG128, maybe she would be able to find her own way out of this one by herself, too (is she her own anchor, after all?) – but Daisy would probably not be able to leave the coffin if they’re both inside of it.

* Regarding Jon: I wish that Martin could turn out to be his anchor, because this season is breaking my heart, but I feel like their exchange at the beginning of the episode was kind of… making it clear that it couldn’t be him, that he wouldn’t agree to it (or then, Jon would have to push for it, and maybe push too far). On the one hand, Jon has been able to find him twice (MAG124, MAG129) thanks to Spooky Powers, when Martin wasn’t expecting Jon to be able to; on the other hand… they have never been especially close – mostly because Jon isn’t especially close to anyone. They used to look a bit closer from the outside, but I felt it was mostly because Martin hadn’t given up on Jon in season 2 (unlike Tim)? Jon trusted him in season 3, Jon tried to talk to him in MAG102, Jon is currently missing him and worried for him and trying to talk and reach for him (AND I LOVE IT, OKAY), but Jon barely knows Martin and I wouldn’t say there is a deep, stable emotional connection between them at the moment? If it had to be someone, I would be leaning towards Georgie.

* (Or The Admiral, but I doubt that Jon would be willing to involve him. Though: I have trouble picturing him making Georgie come to the Institute, too… He didn’t want to involve her much, making her enter The Eye’s temple would sound very risky in that regard, especially with Peter Lukas currently running it?)

* (I keep thinking about Helen because of the doors and because LISTEN… listen…

(MAG127) BASIRA: And don’t open the coffin. ARCHIVIST: [HUMOROUS EXHALES] It is addressed to me! [SILENCE] … Yes, alright. … Alright. [CLICK.]

=> if you get inside the coffin through another door, you don’t need to open the coffin! No breaking (implicit) promises! >:D)

* There is still the possibility of Jon’s grandmother, but I didn’t get the feeling that they were especially close when Jon recalled his childhood with her in MAG081…?

* If the “anchor” is an item: there are the tape recorders, though it’s mostly them who seem to find their ways to Jon, these days. There is also the Web lighter, the status of which is currently unknown: did Jon still have it on him during the Unknowing, or had Martin borrowed it to burn statements in MAG118? What happened to it during Jon’s coma? Same as the tape recorders, though: is it the lighter that follows Jon, or Jon who is drawn to it?

(MAG111) GERRY: […] Nice lighter. You a spider freak, then? ARCHIVIST: What? Oh! Er, n–no. I–I, I never really, uh… I never really thought of it.

* Other contender: the Archives themselves, or the Institute overall?

(I regret even deeper that Basira hasn’t apparently shared with Jon her discussion with Elias, because it implied that Elias still has plans regarding Jon… so if Jon really can’t make it out alone, I wonder whether someone would bulge to save him this time, if things were to derail horrendously. If past experiences are any indication: no, nobody would help him, especially not Elias since Jon was kidnapped for a whole month outside of The Eye’s reach and he only got saved because “Michael” went to finish him, even when The Unknowing was coming up. But. Still.)

Anyway! The lighter made me think again about how it’s not exactly that, but I feel like there is a bit of “Ariadne’s thread helping you through the maze” imagery in the idea of descending into the coffin? Not exactly since it doesn’t seem to be about marking the way back but having something to go back to, but! As I said, a bit. (Fun fact apparently, web strings used by spiders when they go from one place to another can be called “Ariadne’s threads” in French. The more you know.)

- I Can’t Expect Things To Go Greatly In This Series, so: I wonder if even Jon manages to get in and to find Daisy… either she will be either far too gone already and they’ll have to confine her somewhere instead, either Jon will make a mistake resulting in her death – while Basira was working on her way to get her out of it alive. In the latter case, it would definitely cement the fracture between Basira and Jon in such a way that they would both be at fault: Jon would have tried to help but would have broken the interdiction of not opening the coffin; Basira would have wanted to save Daisy but, by refusing to share what she was doing, only nurtured Jon’s eagerness to try to fix things. So yeah. There are many ways it could go very bad, and I have had too many moments of “actually, things are only getting worse, I miss the time when they were less Worse” to hope for how the situation could improve :|

(But maybe it could not be a disaster. Maybe Jon could wait for Basira to come back before trying anything; maybe they would manage to save Daisy; maybe Basira would come back with Simon Fairchild on Elias’s recommendation because he still has a terrible sense of humour, and Jon could take example on how Gertrude stopped the Sunken Sky by throwing Simon into the coffin, neutralizing two threats at the same time. Would make him (rightfully) lose humanity points in Basira’s eyes, though.)

(- Melanie’s bullet was removed, tho!! Which is definitely an improvement, even if she’s currently a wreck.

First was Melanie, now is Daisy… even if the Mission To Rescue Daisy ends in a disaster, maybe trying to get Martin back will come after. Even though we know that Martin has an agenda.)

- If Jon does end up going down into the coffin: I wonder if we will hear him live? Or if he’ll describe what happened afterwards? …………….. or if the scene would switch to Elias describing the events for us. :||||| 

- CHEERS!! The Pit (MAG097) had teeth inside and a tongue, so we know that Buried things can bite. That leaves plenty of opportunities for Jon, who *gasps* is still missing a Buried scar, to get it from there.

The Dark also had the creature that can wreck you. The Flesh has plenty of ways to twist you a bit. As for the Lonely:

(MAG125) ARCHIVIST: […] It’s… frustrating, to be honest. I finally feel myself, I feel… focused, and ready – and I find myself basically alone.

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: [SIGHS] I suppo– … I miss you. MARTIN: [SNERK] ARCHIVIST: I’m just… MARTIN: Lonely. ARCHIVIST: [SIGHS] Yeah.

Whether it’s part of Elias&Peter’s plan or a nice bonus snack for Peter: the Lonely is already affecting Jon. Slowly completing the “collection”, uh.

  MAG130’s title is already out, and MMMMMMM. Biggest plot-twist would be if The Flesh wasn’t involved, uh. (Can we have Melanie back a bit? ;w; Maybe giving a statement about how The Flesh attacked two months ago? ;w;)

[fantroll-purgatory]

@tuesdaney

Info!! (rip this got super long). also image uploader within this is being weird so image is coming as a separate submission. or maybe it’s in the post three times and i just can’t see it, in which case i am so sorry

We can fix every formatting problem behind the scenes. Shh, no one even needs to know anything went wrong. 

Alternian, AU since she eventually joins a session.

Age: 7 sweeps

Name: Januss Celera. Januss from Janus, in reference to both the Roman god of time and Janus particles (specifically particles which are half hydrophilic and half hydrophobic). Celera from Acceleration.

Janus is also a god of transitions and duality, so I think it makes sense for this switching-up thing you’ve given her. He is also associated a lot with travel and journey and so forth. It’s ALSO speculated that his name could’ve been derived from the Latin verb ‘to go’, which fits her speed theme. What I’m saying is Januss Celera is a great name.

Strife Specibus: vehicular manslaughterkind i don’t actually know. she’s not really one for combat, which is to say she’ll murder anyone clearly weaker than her no problem but if it looks like anything close to a fair fight she’s going to be a coward and run away. at a loss for something that fits

She has a really rough and tumble vibe. I think for a regular weapon you could give her maybe a tireironkind? Something that’s functionally related to her interests but that she can also grab and wail on someone with if she needs to. 

Or you could reference her excessive need to win by giving her trophykind. If someone beats her in a race, she can just grab the trophy they won and bash them with that. Seems fitting for her personality.

You could give her vehiclekind as a secondary weapon, though! Weaponize those cars, Januss.  

Fetch Modus: also not too sure. I like the idea of a modus where she has to be traveling at least a certain speed to get items out, so at walking pace she could only get out little things but if shes flooring it in some kinda vehicle she can take out whatever she wants

Velocity Modus sounds like a good idea. Gotta speed up to eject things. 

Or you could do like a Time Challenge Modus. When she wants to eject something from the modus, it’s split into ‘components’ that are scattered across an area and she has a time limit to collect them all. If she fails the time challenge, the item gets locked down for a time proportionate to how important the item is. She could use such a particularly annoying modus because she feels confident in her ability to Always Succeed.

Blood Color: ok hoooo boy here’s where we get to the Whole Idea behind Januss and its going to take a second of explaining my personal speculations on troll genetics and biology, so:

There’s a specific part of the troll genome that goes “hey! this troll is a seadweller” which triggers the development of gills and fins in a grub-to-be, and the violet blood. It’s actually present in the genes of every troll, but is only able to switch on in purplebloods, and only in specific circumstances. basically, all violetbloods are technically mutant purplebloods (and fuchsia blooded trolls are like. an even rarer “hyper mutation” of purplebloods but thats not relevant here) uh. I hope that makes sense? I like speculating how blood color works in trolls and seadwellers in particular are weird. Anyway,

Januss is a violetblood, or at least appears to be one when she’s a grub. She has a mutation in the protein responsible for “switching on” the seadweller gene, though, and it basically switches back off after 4 or so sweeps. As a result, her blood color has shifted from violet to purple and her fins and gills are stunted. On the surface she just looks like a violetblood with kinda small fins, on the inside her gills barely work and are getting worse, and she probably has a few other odd symptoms from her body suddenly changing its mind about blood color. (she’ll probably live to some weird age inbetween what’s expected of violet and purple, for example. if no one finds out and culls her.)

I like this explanation of her state a lot. Something like her having an enzyme/growth hormone that has a visible effect on the blood color and results in the development of particular features. And then her body just says Oops and stops producing that hormone and so her blood goes back to the basic state… It’s really interesting. I think it works, especially because there’s some speculation on the bridge between purples and violets anyways, considering the purple association with aquatic mammals. They’re Close to the seadweller without actually Being the seadweller and I think that provides some definitely reasonable room for mutation and weird halfway development. 

All of that is to say- your theory tracks well enough to justify the theme of your character.

Symbol and meaning: Aquaries is what she’s grown up under and goes by, but technically she’d be Capries, which is somewhat reflected in her horns. When she winds up playing Sgrub and eventually stops hiding her mutation, she makes a new (non canon) symbol for herself by taking Aquaries and making it fit the purpleblood sign language. (caus like, I doubt she’d automatically know “oh yes my actual sign is capries” but she does want to reflect her real blood color)

I like that a lot! Figuring out and working things out for herself is great. And not to spoil what we talk about during the land/title/moon section, but I do agree with these assignments. So I’ll be keeping this in mind when working w/ her design!

Trolltag: agileTraverse. caus she’s fast and can do some sick stunts and she knows it

Might I recommend supersonicAstrobatic[SA]? Just to REALLY push her speed theme and at least pay reference to the fact that she wants to race spaceships. Or astrobaticTerminality[AT] if you want to keep the same abbreviation. It keeps the spaceship reference. Terminality pays reference to the god Janus’ theme of End Points, meaning here the Extreme, The Most. Also a good reference to the fact that she’s ruthless and will, in fact, do a kill. She’s a terminal astrobatic.

Quirk: ^she encloses her words like this to resemble her symbol. she types fairly normally, no capitalization unLESS/SHE/GETS/EXCITED/OR/ANGRY/IN/WHICH/CASE/SHES/FAST/AND/LOUD/AND/EVERYONE/KNOWS/IT!!!!!!!!!!!!^

Not sure how she’d change that after changing her symbol, maybe by swapping the ^ for a u.

Honestly I think just keeping it around would be acceptable? It’s the way she’s talked for a lot of years, so you could make the argument that the habit is hard to break and just sticks around. It’s implied that it reflects a real manner of speaking, too, since Sollux’s changes upon blindness. So unless you think she would change some of her vocal mannerisms or would undergo some physical impact (like losing her front teeth, to return to the Sollux example), there’s no Real need to adjust her quirk. 

Special Abilities: nothing beyond standard highblood stuff, and the aforementioned mutation. It’s worth mentioning that she can’t do chucklevoodos though. I figure her seadweller upbringing keeps her distanced from the whole juggalo religion thing, even after she “shows her true colors”, as it were.

Makes sense, since she didn’t fall back into purpleblood until she hit, what, ~8 years old? I think you could probably make a case for her not having psychic abilities but still having just the subtle passive influence of chucklevoodoos. Because I think the implication is that it’s a natural ability meant to Keep Lowbloods In Check that is cultivated by the church for a specific purpose/aesthetic. 

What I’m saying is that you could give her some really weak chaotic auras that make her slightly more naturally intimidating.

Lusus: Sailfishmom! A large sailfish with some froggy qualities, like bug eyes and fins that are more like a tadpole’s tail. Sailfish caus they’re fast and frog caus they start in the water but do land stuff later in life. She has a pretty ok relationship with her lusus, who helped her through the rough patch that was “oh fuck im a mutant”.

Love the idea of this! Really clever. The transition of the tadpole combined with the speed of the sailfish fit her image very well! Do they breathe through their skin?

Personality/interests: Januss is constantly impatient and constantly moving. Part of this is just the way she is, part of it is her anxiety to grow up and leave the planet as soon as possible so she can claim governorship over some backwater colony where no one higher up than her can figure out her secret. her passion is vehicle racing, be it ships or cars or spaceships (well, she wants to race spaceships, anyway. when she’s actually off planet.) She has an enormous garage of assorted vehicles in her hive, which is a gargantuan decommissioned spacefighter carrier, half sunk near a sandbar as the dying wish of the former captain.

Sorry to interject. There’s just something very, very funny to me about the idea of a Carpenter Drone just placing a child in a half-sunken spaceship and being like Good Luck. It’s also a great hive location thematically, so good on ya.

She loves giving custom paintjobs and shady modifications to her rides, the latter giving her a nice edge in the less respectable races she participates in (which is all of them.) Her trophies and her killcount on the tracks are both formidable in number, but out of the drivers seat she tends to be a coward. She has few friends, and barely filled quadrants, managing to escape culling only by pulling some strings with her royal status. This isn’t because she’s antisocial, rather she’s terrified someone will figure out her secret. All of her friends are land dwellers because of this, since hanging out underwater for long would probably drown her.

I like the idea of her giving some really wild paintjobs to her rides. Violets are described as the eccentrics, so her reflecting just a little bit of that seadweller tendency could be fun. The shady modifications are also interesting. Does she purchase them on the black market? Have a supplier? Or does she fiddle with them herself? All of the above could be interesting. 

Like she could start off buying from a shady person and then move into tinkering with them herself, to… mixed results.

I like the idea of her being a coward, too- it makes sense! If there’s a fair fight on the horizon, she runs the risk of bleeding. And running the risk of bleeding is something she’d never want to do. 

I have to point out that she’s not really Currently at risk of being culled for being partnerless. At 7 sweeps, she’d be sitting comfortably at about 15. Though we don’t Really have confirmation of about when the Imperial Drones come knocking, it’s safe to assume it’d be closer to when the trolls are About To Leave Planet, since that’s when they’d be adults. Which  means she’s got a little over one sweep to sort her shit out or run. …Or pull some nobility strings, as you’ve mentioned. 

I feel like it’s worth noting at this point that Janus is heavily associated with Auspices. So giving her a more firm relationship in that regard might be a good idea just to draw the link. 

Despite her cowardice she has a definite ruthless streak even when off the track, it just tends to only be aimed at lowbloods who she’s sure she can take on. While racing she’s even more brutal, and her general cockiness and arrogance combine with this to make her a terrible sport. If you win against her you’re dead as soon as the race is over if she thinks she can take you.

I like this a lot. Especially because it shines a light on a very Purpleblood habit of hers. Purplebloods are said to take their work very seriously (even if their work isn’t often… conventional, by our standards) and to desire to be the Foremost in their field, plus they’re known for being very violent. 

Also I hope her underestimating lowbloods comes back to bite her in the ass.

Title: Something of time, for sure, since the whole theme I’m trying to run with Januss is well, literally running. Trying to get into her adult life and away from what she’s afraid of, trying to always be the fastest on the track, her mutation making her a seadweller for only a limited time, et cetera. I don’t have a concrete plot planned for her but you can bet her need to hurry everything will Absolutely Ruin her life bigtime at some point and she’ll have to dig her way out of that. That being said, I can’t decide what class fits her.

I agree with her time assignation so much. The valuing of action, the refusal of passivity even if it’s reckless, the Very strong struggle against fate, the focus on the destination, her restlessness, her ruthlessness… It all checks out! 

Now on to her class:

Prince of Time, Prince of Time, Prince of Time, Prince of Time-

Sorry, got excited about that one. I just think with her general ruthless nature and her impatience, prince of time is a Very fitting role for her. She’s someone very active and someone who seems very focused on her own goals. And this title suits that, but in the worst possible ways. 

Basically speaking, a Prince of Time is able to destroy time or destroy With time. 

Given her impatience and her desire to progress, I can easily see her just destroying segments of time. Deleting them. Poof. Trying to get to where she wants to be as fast as possible. Of course, this would fragment the universe and cause great harm. Skipping out on major segments and very important events could easily distort the timeline. Since inevitability is tied so strongly with the time aspect, Inevitability Itself could be destroyed, which could severely hurt the Alpha Timeline and splinter things to the point of incomprehensibility. Using her time travel in this way could really damage her life and like the lives of everyone across multiple different versions of reality. 

She could also destroy through time, like making things experience decay and destruction at a further rate, or bringing about their inevitable demise sooner than expected. 

Her inverse, Sylph of Space, would allow her to passively create Space. As she fragments and chews up timelines, more and more Boundless Space is able to exist. Each time she uses this power, she creates another timeline, more theoretical Room in which to operate. Which could lead to some grand ‘working with yourself from another dimension’ fun! 

The development needed for this title comes with this: She would have to undergo some major character development to stop from ruining everything. She would have to learn to reign herself in and get herself under control and learn to appreciate the moment before she Destroyed All. 

Land: Not sure? I like the idea of a water covered planet where she has to figure out how to lower the water level to properly traverse it, and even after figuring it out the water will only recede very slowly, making her wait. Sort of both a lesson in patience and an acceptance of her mutation? idk

I love this idea. The fact that it would seem like a mockery of her condition at first but it would allow her to slowly come to terms with it. And the teaching her to slow down and smell the roses. Maybe she could stumble upon mysteries and treasures, things she absolutely would’ve missed if she’d been able to rush through the planet. 

Dream Planet: Derse for sure.

Wow this is very long. I’ll send over the picture in another submission.

Here’s Januss! Left is living that highblood life, right is in session after she’s become comfortable letting that go. She wears the goggles during her races as her highblood self, and more or less all the time later, since she’s found that when she dosen’t have to keep up an elaborate lie around water, she likes it a lot better.

I’ll be honest there’s not much I had to edit for her. 

LEFT SIDE-

Horns and hair: I kept them the same. But let me tell you spriting that hair wasn’t easy! Very fun, though. 

Fins: I edited them to be slightly smaller than the traditional seadweller fins! 

Eyes: I wanted to make them nicely sharp and with some dark lines to make sure they looked defined and dangerous. I also had to give her some eyelashes because of troll rules. 

Mouth: I loved it so it gets to stick how it was. 

Clothes: I took John’s ectobiologist jacket and edited it so thoroughly I almost considered skipping on mentioning it, but that’d be rude. Either way, I liked most of the detail and really liked how it looks kind of like an admiral’s jacket. I decided to take the jacket and extend it down into the pants, though. For two reasons, really:

1. The original pants color looked too much like purpleblood and I thought it’d be antithetical to her trying to hide her blood condition to wear such a large amount of it on her clothes. 

2. Combining them together reminded me of racecar driver jumpers! 

Shoes: They’re just some pretty simple and straightforward boots.

RIGHT SIDE-

Horns, hair, fins, eyes: See above. 

Goggles: I liked them a lot, so I kept them around. I just took the outline of her shirt and created an overlay with it, and then put a screen for reflective light. 

Mouth: Purpleblood lipstick, like in your original art. 

Symbol: I couldn’t really see the detail of the symbol really well on your original drawing, so I tried to create what I could tell of it as best as I could. It looks a liiittle similar to Capripia, but that’s fine. I think the straight edge ends and the curled wings as well as the rounded diamond set it apart enough and I think it takes enough notes from her Aquaries symbol to be at least recognizable in context! 

Pants: Because she’s a purpleblood I didn’t want to leave her without some neat patterned flourish. So I added a checker pattern to one leg. Mostly because I’ve seen a lot of motorcycle racers with those kinds of patterns on their legs. And it makes her look edgy.

Boots: The same but edited to have more gold and purple. 

Thank you so much for sharing her, I absolutely loved her and loved working on her!

-CD

[shadowsong26fic]

Let’s Go Steal A Crossover: Part 1

No real plot here, this is mostly the background/backstory details.

Note/Disclaimer: this particular outline features an OC of mine and as a result is fairly self-indulgent. Because what else are crack outlines for?

That out of the way, here we go!

For the Leverage crew:

This is more or less in a S3 sort of environment--they may or may not be chasing Space Damien Moreau, but in terms of their team dynamic, etc., that’s where they are.

(Let’s be real, though, they are TOTALLY chasing Space Damien Moreau.)

(Who is, as in Leverage canon, very much a power-behind-the-throne kind of guy.)

(I.e., he is not a Moff or an Admiral or a planetary ruler or a sector governor or anything like that.)

(He just happens to have quite a few of them in his pocket.)

(He’s not affiliated with Black Sun or any of the Hutts or any other established syndicate, either. He’s his own thing.)

Nate--

He’s from a fairly prosperous Mid Rim world, went to a Core World university (probably either Coruscant or Alderaan).

The Clone Wars started right around when he graduated, if I’m parsing the timelines and ages right.

So, granted I’m making this up on the fly based on things I half-remembered, but while there are non-clone non-Jedi military officers, they’re mostly High Command types.

However, Nate does not have the background, experience, or connections for that kind of work.

He spends the War working for his home sector/planet's senator, as an investigator/learning about security/etc.

(How he manages to pull this off, despite his father’s legit Shady Past, is probably a Story in and of itself.)

Postwar, he goes into the private sector, working for an insurance company.

(Where he meets Sterling.)

(And Maggie.)

(And Sophie.)

Incidentally, while he doesn’t have the inside information to really disbelieve the late-stage propaganda, he’s a little Perturbed by exactly how quick and bloody the end of the war and the transition to the Empire was.

Something Is Not Right here, but he’s not sure exactly what, and is not yet so disillusioned to do anything about that doubt. But it remains, in the back of his mind, to resurface when everything falls apart.

This is, however, a large part of why he leaves public service.

From here, Nate’s backstory is more or less the same as in canon.

(I did toy with having Sam dead of Inquisitors instead for a while, but that would not translate right and, more importantly, is too mean to Maggie.)

(I love Maggie, have I mentioned that?)

Sophie--

What can one say about Space Sophie Devereaux.

...about as much as one can say about the canon version, honestly.

She’s Kuati, that much everyone knows for sure.

Whether she’s actually of the minor nobility is up for some debate.

(Yes, there was an equivalent of the King George Job)

She was in her early/mid-teens when the Clone War happened. Kuat itself seems to have been mostly untouched, but under heavy military guard because of the valuable shipyards.

She left Kuat three or four years postwar, and began creating her various aliases and legend.

(And occasionally working as an actress, of course.)

...yep, that’s pretty much what I have here.

Hardison--

Also pretty similar to his canon backstory, except that he’s slightly younger--probably closer to Jyn Erso’s age/two or three years older than the Skytwins.

Like Nate, he’s from the Mid Rim, but he’s from a planet that was heavily contested during the War.

(i.e., it ended up pretty bombed to hell)

(his parents died towards the end of the war, which is how he ended up with Nana)

His particular brand of invention/cleverness is particularly useful in a slowly-recovering warzone, though.

Parker--

Parker is actually from Coruscant.

The underlevels.

One of the kids who consistently slipped through the cracks, under both the Republic and the Empire.

Until Archie Leach found her.

And then unleashed her on the Galaxy.

And now, the fun part--Eliot!

Eliot is, in fact, a clone.

He was part of the so-called Last Batch; born (decanted?) about six months before the end of the war, so he never saw action during that conflict.

There were whispers, among the older cadets--the ones who were mature enough to hear echoes of a voice in their heads, who knew at least bits and pieces what the adult clones had done and why.

(The whispers are carefully, carefully encouraged by some of the adults who were able to fight through the compulsion. Not well enough, or fast enough, to save their Jedi, but damned if they wouldn’t protect their little brothers. Who will grow up to be men, not weapons. Which means that most of the Last Batch and varying proportions of the older cadets had their chips removed before leaving Kamino.)

(....and now I’m going to have to do something completely unrelated with the Last Batch and their relationships with their various older brothers at some point, aren’t they.)

Eliot, like most of his generation, goes into the Stormtrooper corps when he’s mature enough.

He stays in for a while--a good couple of years. He’s separated from his brothers, for the most part, but a few are with him. One by one, they die or desert--he covers for the ones who get away.

He’s the last. He bonded with a few of the non-clone troopers, and it isn’t until there’s no one in his unit he feels like he needs to stay for that he leaves.

(He promises himself, when he leaves that armor behind, that he’s not going to find himself in that situation again. He has only himself to look after now, and he is damn sure going to stay that way.)

He starts wandering, working as a bounty hunter/assassin for hire.

(He does have one brief, slightly surreal encounter with Boba Fett.)

(Who is Not Thrilled that one of the millions of men with his face is trying to do his job.)

Occasionally, he’s even hired by the Empire.

(Any jobs he does for them, he of course does from safely behind a mask.)

He spends some time on Mandalore, carefully connecting with his roots and finding plenty of work in that planet’s increasing unrest.

(There is a Story to tell here, I’m sure, possibly one involving Bo-Katan and/or Korkie Kryze...)

And, of course, he spends about six months working for Space Damien Moreau.

He occasionally, in his travels, has come across his brothers--ranging decommissioned Clone Wars vets, to older cadets, to others of the Last Batch.

He tends not to seek them out, though, and to avoid interacting when he can.

There’s too much baggage, positive and negative, with all his brothers of every generation.

Besides. He promised himself he wouldn’t put down roots with a unit or a team again.

Miscellania--

Their first job together runs much as in canon, and they settle in as a team and loosely follow the same overall storyline as in canon.

Nate knows damn well that Eliot is a clone, though he didn’t until they met in person.

(While he didn’t work directly with the GAR and never met any Jedi, he did meet several clone soldiers. It’s a hard face to forget, when you’ve seen it several times over the course of three years.)

Sophie figures it out, too--she met several soldiers assigned to guard the shipyards.

Their marks generally don’t figure it out, actually.

Not a lot is known about the Last Batch.

I mean, sure, if any of these industry/corporate titans actually thought things through, they’d remember that the clones were in production up through the very end of the war, so obviously something must have been done to the ones who were too young for combat at that point.

But, honestly, even if some part of you is aware/acknowledges that there are younger clones running around, are you really going to expect one to wander through your door pretending to be a chef/caterer or a pro baseball player or a country music star or an IT tech or...

(Parker and Hardison figure it out when one of their marks actually does identify Eliot as a clone.)

(They don’t particularly care, except Hardison remembers/learns about the rapid aging factor and starts using his downtime to try and find a fix for that.)

(When he’s not playing Space WoW, anyway.)

(Or helping Nate with whatever sketchy and underhanded Long-Term Scheme he’s got in mind right now.)

(They’re not on the black box yet, of course, but probably right now most of Hardison’s not-active-job time is spent on tracking Moreau.)

(He and Parker have probably been tossing ideas back and forth about robbing Kamino to try and find a fix, though...)

(Or at least the Last Batch’s records.)

(But that is a plot for another fic. And possibly one of the things they end up doing during the six-month break between S4 and S5.)

The Skytwins’ Team:

Here’s where the super self-indulgent part comes in.

So, this is technically an offshoot of an offshoot of Masks!Verse, which is a very near-canon AU (what I call an In Spite of a Nail AU) where Lavinia exists. Essentially, in Masks!Verse, nothing we see onscreen during the OT happens any differently, but there’s some Interesting Stuff happening elsewhere that sets up a different post-ROTJ timeline. Nothing at all changes until three years after ROTS, when Lavinia is born, and after that only things she’s Directly Involved In change, and most of that is internal Imperial power plays, at least through ROTJ.

(TFA more or less happens because I like it, but the road there is a little bit different and the canon I was operating from is locked there. I.e., due to what Lavinia and her daughter in this timeline end up doing, things go much more AU starting with the opening sequence of TLJ.)

Masks!verse, incidentally, is technically Lavinia’s core timeline, in that it’s the first one I created of the three base timelines I have for her (Masks, Precipice, and PT-generation), but that’s a whole separate conversation. It does probably explain why Masks!Verse has like a million variants/offshoots, though...

Anyway. Digression aside, this crossover actually draws from a Masks!Verse offshoot that I call the Lavinia Organa AU.

(You can probably guess where this is going.)

(It’s very much an Exactly What It Says On The Tin type thing.)

(And, honestly, could do with its own outline for the rewrite of ANH alone...)

But the Cliff Notes version:

When Lavinia is born/announced, Breha goes to Bail and says “we managed to successfully rescue/kidnap one Sith Lord’s baby daughter, we should rescue this one, too.”

They had never really decided on only having one kid, after all. Just at least one, and they wanted a daughter.

(It just ended up not happening in canon because of the need for secrecy/not wanting to complicate things and put Leia at risk.)

(I saw a meta post the other day that points out that Bail was clearly ready to take both Skytwins, but then Yoda said to separate them.)

(This may or may not have come up in primary Masks!Verse, incidentally, but there, they decided it was too risky and they had to focus on protecting the daughter they already had.)

(It’s arguable how much kidnapping was technically involved in adopting Leia. But they do just straight-up kidnap Lavinia. They also fudge some records and release carefully-timed photos and do not make any in-person appearances with her so they can claim she’s three months younger than she actually is.)

How do they pull this off? ...IDK, magic? Handwave for now, it is out of the scope of this project.

Leia and Lavinia grow up pretty close.

(Not that they never fight--they bicker constantly, especially in the years before Leia starts taking a more active role in the Rebellion and a more official role in Alderaan’s government.)

(Lavinia, at thirteen, isn’t really allowed to do much at that point, but she backs Leia in everything and helps a lot with the background research/legwork.)

A couple notable details: Bail and Breha decided pretty early on that they wanted to tell each of their daughters a shell of their bioparents’ stories, leaving out the key details but sticking more or less to the truth as best they could without putting their girls at risk.

So, Leia knows basically what she was told in canon--that her birth mother was a close friend of her parents, they didn’t know her birth father well, and both her bioparents died at the end of the Clone War.

That’s enough for her. She knows who her real parents are, and doesn’t especially care about her bioparents at this point. She has other things to worry about/deal with.

Lavinia is told that her birth mother died shortly after she was born, and her birth father was Not A Good Person and lost custody of her.

So, the thing about Lavinia--it’s less prominent in this AU because she had a functional childhood and parents who treated her like a person and not a spy/asset, but she’s very...the way she puts it in Precipice!Verse is that she doesn’t like walking into a room unprepared. And this shell of a story about her birth parents feels like the kind of thing that could bite her actual parents and her sister (and her) in the ass in a major way.

So, very quietly, around the time Leia starts working as an active Rebel agent, she starts digging into it, trying to identify her bioparents.

She doesn’t find any stories around her official age that match what her parents told her, and she doesn’t think they would lie.

But, she reasons, they might have skewed things or lied about her age to protect her from her biofather.

And then she learns Emperor Palpatine had a daughter, who died, who’s approximately the right age.

When she asks her parents about this, they don’t lie. They confirm it for her

(They would have done the same for Leia, if she had done the legwork and asked them point-blank, but like I said it’s not something she particularly cares about at this point.)

Lavinia then asks if she can tell Leia--they’ve actually been getting closer since Leia suddenly developed all these Adult Responsibilities, and the events of the Princess Leia novel happened.

This pretty much cements their relationship. While they still bicker a fair amount--they’re both pretty strong personalities, and not always compatible ones; Leia being a Soldier and Lavinia being a Spy, plus they’re teenage sisters who are fairly close in age--but they are Ride Or Die Full Stop from this point out.

By the time ANH actually rolls around, they’re both active Rebel agents--Lavinia works mostly with Intelligence and to a point with supply/other support forces, because she’s good at reading people and mapping interpersonal networks and figuring out who to approach, while Leia does more or less what she does in canon.

Again, the actually rewrite of ANH would be its own outline, so the important bits (with minimal detail in case I do end up doing this one properly at some point):

Lavinia and Leia are both on the Tantive.

Lavinia takes a shuttle/tender ship/something and separates, hoping to act as an additional decoy, that Vader will assume that the big ship is the Obvious Decoy and focus on her instead so Leia can get the plans to Kenobi safely.

Vader, of course, has the resources to track both of them so this doesn’t work.

Lavinia ends up tagging along on the Falcon and ending up on the Death Star with the others.

Everyone, including Obi-Wan, actually makes it off the station alive.

Lavinia was running around in the air vents for a while, and left behind a blood sample. On impulse, Vader runs it--he wants to identify all of Obi-Wan’s co-conspirators as quickly as possible and while there are no clear shots of her face on the surveillance footage he has, this is an available resource he can use.

Obi-Wan tells Luke and Leia who they are to each other (though sticks to the Certain Point Of View story about their biodad for the time being).

They have a moment of “...well, that explains a lot” and just accept it and move on.

So, at this point, there are some Key Secrets going on:

One, that Luke and Leia are the twin children, biologically, of Anakin Skywalker and Padme Naberrie Amidala.

People who know this: Obi-Wan, Luke, Leia, and Lavinia (they tell each other pretty much everything of this level of importance.)

Two, that Anakin Skywalker is now Darth Vader.

People who know this: Obi-Wan, Vader, Palpatine.

Three, that Lavinia Organa is Palpatine’s biological daughter.

People who know this: Lavinia, Leia, Vader, Mon Mothma (who they told in a “so this might be a Thing and we want to make sure Someone in High Command is prepared JUST IN CASE).

(They probably tell Luke before too much longer, but they do not share this detail with Obi-Wan.)

Right, so. Those are the Most Important Details for the purposes of understanding Let’s Go Steal A Crossover, I think.

Anyway, I’m drawing from this AU for two reasons:

(Or, three, if we include the fact that I Like It And I Can.)

First, it’s an easy way to get the Skytwins’ team connected/integrated with a minimum of Drama.

Second, because it’s kind of where the whole crossover concept came from. I was babbling at my very patient roommate about the Lavinia Organa AU (specifically about potential ESB/Cloud City plot points), and realized “lol, I could make a religion Leverage team out of this.”

“....WAIT I COULD MAKE A LEVERAGE TEAM OUT OF THIS!”

Here’s how it works:

Hitter: Leia. Who is a tiny ball of rage a lot of the time, and takes after both her bioparents in a large degree. She is definitely, definitely their combat specialist, even if she hasn’t really played that role in her previous work.

Hacker: Han. He’s the one who’s good at improvising tech, etc.

Grifter: Lando. Quick, act shocked.

Thief: Luke. Very different style from Parker, of course, but still.

Mastermind: Lavinia. Who, while not in any way going to use it as he did, inherited her biological father’s aptitude for strategy and manipulation.

The dynamic isn’t 100% the same, of course. For example, Lavinia may be the strategist, but Leia is more the team lead in the field. But it still lines up really great and then I started poking at the Leverage backstories above after the initial concept occurred to me and here we are.

Miscellania:

This crossover takes place in a vague “timelines mean nothing” sort of state. As I said before, the Leverage team is more or less in S3. We’ll say the Skytwins team is somewhere around ESB, though obviously the background leading them there is going to be Very Different.

The actual plot is going to start with The Two Live Crew Job In SPACE and go from there.

(Possibly getting more complicated, as we throw in Sterling and/or Vader and/or Obi-Wan and/or the Ghost crew.)

(In that last case, the Ghost crew never split up/Kanan never died/Ezra never went on a road trip with Thrawn and a bunch of space whales.)

And...that should cover it! Sometime this week (I’m hoping before Solo comes out), I’ll put up Part Two, which will cover the Actual Plot.

[mikunology]

Mikunology File #4: Fanmade/Derivative Characters in Vocal Android

Forget those dumb character lists I made in the first two files, I don’t have the time to make icons/portraits for everybody.

But, I figured I might as well talk about the fanmade and deriative characters that will be featured in this series/comic/story/whatever, so here we go. And remember, some portrayals of characters are made up purely for storytelling’s sake--if there wasn’t a story to any of this, I’d probably portray some of these characters differently.

Info under the cut! (WARNING: A CRAPTON OF READING.)

Truthfully, unlike the Cryptons, who have a clear-cut role in the story (which is, duh, the main characters), a lot of the fanmade characters are sort of scattered throughout the story. Some are important, most are just little background characters that help populate this wacky, futuristic world the Vocaloids live in. But I have to say, I have the Friendship is Magic approach to background characters: despite being backgrounds, they probably have their own story to tell.

So what of them?

Akita Neru & Yowane Haku: Oh, these guys. As stated on a post I made on Incorrect Vocal Android Quotes, these two start out as low-tier villains, so low-tier I actually wouldn’t categorize them as such considering other characters fill the title of “villain” so much better. Why? Story-wise, these two do little more than make halfhearted attempts at antagonizing Miku and the Cryptons, and even then, it’s mostly Neru’s personal envy. That’s why I don’t consider it a spoiler that Neru and Haku end up joining the heroes--though Haku’s role gets expanded later on as we learn more about her creators.

Calne Ca/Calcium: Calcium, surprisingly enough, would have counted as a oneshot villain if it weren’t for the fact she’s just terribly lonely. Calcium, in reference to Deino’s concept, is supposed to be a robotic exoskeleton--and in this story, a robotic exoskeleton developed by a miscellaneous company for some shady reasons. She gains a Miku skin (thus becoming Calne Ca) after coming to idolize Miku’s music and deeds, and later on gets the more humanlike skin from Bacterial Contamination after Miku befriends her.

Zatsune Miku: As mentioned on Incorrect Vocal Android as well, Zatsune is definitely one of the more textbook supervillains in Sapporo. Created by a mysterious underground company, Zatsune’s mission is basically Kill & Replace--assassinate Miku, get all her glory and fame, maybe cause a robot uprising in the process, who knows. Thing is, curiously enough Zatsune’s specific function is more of an attack droid, not a singing one, and while at first she’s a bit more quirky and hammy she gets MUCH more serious when you see her...other design (aka her original one, if you’ve been to the Fanloid Wiki).

Dell Honne: Last I checked, I mentioned Dell quite a few times on Incorrect Vocal Android as well, and well...he’s not at all a nice guy, and arguably a worse villain than Zatsune depending on your perspective. While in retrospect I realize Dell was supposed to be a “Yowane Len”, so to speak, he’s actually a human character who is supposed to be Haku’s creator. He runs the large technology company Honne Corporation (a corporation I’ll go into more detail about later since I plan on making a post about companies in this story), and initially created Haku based on Miku’s success, and subsequently junked her when Haku failed to perform. But he’s not just a backstory character--he gets up to some evil plans later.

Hagane Miku: OK, OK. I’ll be honest that my portrayal of Hagane is a bit confusing, but I’ll do my best to be straight about it. (The problem with Miku’s derivatives is that I had to explain why she has so many lookalikes.) To start, I will say that I didn’t initially intend Hagane to be her own person in this verse--in one of the old drafts of this plotline, Hagane was simply a death metal alter ego Miku took on when people wanted her to be edgier. But in this current plotline, there are two Haganes, based on the H-side and M-side versions the Haganeloids were supposed to have. 

Hagane Type-H: The Type H Haganes are a line of attack droids sent to destroy Sapporo while simultaneously wrecking Miku’s reputation, supposedly created by a faction of Honne Corp. (though it’s unconfirmed). The thing is about the H-Haganes is that unlike the Cryptons, or heck, unlike Zatsune, they are mindless--they simply follow the commands whoever made them gives them. Which, to Miku and crew, makes them that much more dangerous.

Hagane Type-M: This is where the more confusing part comes. See, as more stuff happens, the Vocaloids end up inspiring a LOT of people, and not only do more singers pop up because of them, more heroes do, too! That said, it’s not uncommon for some of said new heroes to base their image on the Vocaloids themselves--and thus, M-Type Hagane Miku is a vigilante fighting bad guys on the lower deck in a punk-rock Miku image. Who she really is, no one knows, but she definitely helps the group when the H-Types show up.

Sakine Meiko: OK, this one is purely technical but I felt I should clear up some things in case someone tries to point it out--Sakine Meiko and the Meiko that features as a main character (MEIKO) are one and the same. Sakine as the derivative she’s known as was Meiko’s persona when she used to be a teen idol, being a one-hit wonder before retiring so Meiko could study science. Hence, that’s why I give Meiko the surname of “Sakine” even as an adult.

Shion Family: Yes, they exist here, too. The Shion Family is, as expected, Kaito’s crazy family of brothers (and one sister) that he occasionally goes to visit, or that occasionally visit him and cause havoc. I won’t go into detail about each one, but the family is pretty much made up of (in order of birth): Akaito (red), Kikaito (yellow), Kaito himself (blue), Mokaito (brown), Taito (purple), Nigaito (green), Kaiko, and finally Kageito (who I’ll go more into next). All this plus their unnamed foster father who I need to make. Zeito, as much as I wanted to include him, isn’t here simply because I haven’t figured out a role for him yet (as Kageito kind of has the role people would expect Zeito to have, knowing Zatsune).

Kageito Shion: You know how above I say that not all portrayals in Vocal Android are reflective of my image of the character, and that if this were ust a story-less random thing characters would be portrayed differently? This is definitely one of those times. Kageito, in this story, is Zatsune’s right-hand man and most loyal lackey, being a calm and sweet boy that was transformed into a devious and crazed monster after being possessed by a mysterious shadow being. He directly antagonizes Miku and the Kagamines numerous times but is routinely defeated, and goes into hiding with Zatsune sometime later (whom he’s infatuated with, by the way). Whether Miku actually brings him back to his original self is up in the air.

Hatsune Mikuo, Kagamine Rinto, and Kagamine Lenka: I was slightly iffy about adding genderbends in simply because it’d be hard to explain how they exist (because, like I said before, I’m trying to explain why there’s so many Mikus running around), but I gave in eventually. Kind of along the lines of how Haku was developed, the genderbends were made as knockoffs--created by a couple of random scientists who wanted a piece of the action. Mikuo, Rinto, and Lenka don’t have the powers that Miku and crew have, though, but they befriend them just the same. S’all good.

Kagami Kawaiine: Now we’re getting to the silly ones. Kagami, unlike most of the characters above, is simply a silly background character that pops up now and again to annoy absolutely everyone around her. She’s a human girl that tries to imitate Miku and interrupts random events by being a weeb.

Sasayaki Nerune: Another background character, and actually my OWN character--she’s a narcoleptic android that works random odd jobs and appears from time to time doing something weird. I just think it’s fun to have her cameo occasionally.

Hachune Miku, Tako Luka, Shiteyanyo and Larval Rin: The weird little mascots are characters that simply pop in now and again to do whatever, with Tako Luka officially being Luka’s pet in this story. Hachune shows up very randomly as a sort of a visual joke, but also offers Miku rather assertive advice (thus leading Miku to believe Hachune is simply a figment of her imagination). Shiteyanyo and Larval Rin I haven’t decided on yet, but maybe they’ll show up somewhere.

Mikudayo: Mikudayo, in all essence, is just a little running gag that exists solely to spook the hell out of the other characters. While I imagine it originated at a convention/concert kind of place (mirroring how it came to be in real life), it just stalks Miku relentlessly for some reason. Miku isn’t too sure it’s even just a human in a suit, either.

OK so that was a LOT of writing I just did. But yep, those are the plans for those characters, at least. And just so everyone knows, I’m totally open to suggestions on other derivatives as characters (I am NOT taking ocs, but if there’s a more notable fanmade I haven’t heard of then I’d love to include them). If you got to the end of this post, then I wholly appreciate your endurance of my weird ideas and your interest.

[badlydrawnjotarocean]

Concerning the Design Drama

I’m really sorry that this has to be my first post after a long hiatus

I wanna thank everyone though who has sent me good vibes about this situation, it’s very touching

I've been seeing others have an opinion on this matter between Mod Jota and myself. I figures I'd personally tell my own opinions and side on the discussion.

First of all let me discuss the matter of the private conversation that was posted online.

Posting up a conversation that was put in the DM’s without the EXPLICIT permission of the other person on the other side of the conversation? Not really cool! Yes, I did block Jota, but he should have kept that as a private matter between him and me because I didn’t give consent on publishing at all.

Announcing to the world that he was going to post the conversation, even if I had said yes it’s okay, if he published without even asking me about it? I probably still would not be okay with that! I hadn’t even seen that post prior to getting his private message, and it didn’t seem like he was going to tell me that he was going to post this on public! I do understand trying to be transparent to everyone, but when you’re not as transparent to the other person on the other side of the wall as you are with the audience, that's not okay. I'm grateful he deleted the old design and started anew, but the public does NOT need to know our conversation.

In fact, whether or not I DID say anything back wouldn’t really have mattered on the factor, he still was planning on redesigning character no matter what! So why would everyone need to see my reaction nonetheless? It seems a little shady to me. 

But since we are here talking about the conversation, lets dive into it! 

In my reply, was I aggressive? Yes! Was I not very compliant and open to what he had to say? Definitely YES, I immediately blocked him before he could explain more on his factor. But frankly, I don’t want to hear any excuses after three times a design got stolen from me by the same person! 

And frankly? His apology seemed more like he wanted to get it over with because he knew he had been caught and had to do public damage control. Not a very genuine tone in my opinion, however it’s text, tone can be easily interpreted the wrong way, so I won’t hold onto him on that too much.

Secondly, the three designs!

I never publically talked about them because this is NOT something that needs to be public. Again, I do really want believe they were misunderstandings, but 3 design misunderstandings from the same person? That sounds more like a pattern to me. 

First time it happened, it was my initial Standswap design!

((The bottom one I gave a little update too but I’m posting this here for facial reference.))

After a few months of standswap being over, BDhumanstar was introduced, made by Mod Jota, prior to DailyKujos!

Also for time reference

And before I dive into why this design made me feel uncomf let me start by repeating what I said to Jota: We are basing off of the same concept and character, so of course we WILL have similarities. However, this does NOT allow our characters to look identical.

Again similarity is fine, gloves? The loin cloth thingie? Sure, the canon Star Plat had em, why not! However, it’s gotten to the point that someone actually interacted with Jota’s blog because they thought Jota had explicit permission from me to rp my Star Plat Gijinka design, there’s an issue.

So when I saw this initially I was really greatly unsettled, however I thought I was just being too overzealous and let it go. It’s Star Plat right? People will be similar! Its a gijinka of a concept that already exists, surely it’s fine if they look a bit a like, they’re on the same concept! 

I’m finally off my first Hiatus, and people inform me that dailykujos has a really similar artstyle to my own, and tell me he’s trying to rip mine off. I didn’t think anything of it when I saw it, because I saw it more as he’s trying to draw inspiration from me. So that was a okay with me. 

Until I saw his standswap Jotaro which looked a little too familiar for me.

Mine, posted around when I participated in the second Standswap

Theirs, around the third standswap, which I hadn’t participated in.

Again, similarity on same concept, is fine! But the fact that there have been so many Jotaro Stands out there so different, yet this one looks so similar to my own? Doesn’t sit well with me. So I didn’t want this to go on for a third time on accident. 

So I told him in private dms about both the standswaps.

I unfortunately did not know that blocking someone makes you delete your message history with them, so I do not have the messages. 

However, him acting surprised like this was the first time he had been told his design looks stolen doesn’t seem right.

He responded and apologized, which I’m glad he was very compliant and changed the Jotaro design!

Which hey! Looks different, looks cool, it’s good by me!

He however didn’t change Star’s design until the next Standswap had came up, However, perhaps this was a misunderstanding there, I said something among the lines of your standswaps look a little too much like my own, can you change them? And maybe he only misread and interpreted as one of them, that is my own bad for not being clearer on that matter. I should have said something again but again, I could tell I was hurting his feelings just by pointing out one of them so I decided to give him a break.

Fast forward to about last night? My friends AGAIN tell me to look at something from Kujos, and low and behold I see something sadly very familiar.

Unfortunately I don't have a screenshot of it because Jota did delete it, so forgive me for not being able to get the stamp.

It looked way too much like to a Star Plat I had reinovated for the former standswap, because small redesigns right?

I do understand headphones yes, he’s a DJ, Star Plat gotta listen to his hot beats right? But a lot of his attributes are the same. Again. And at this point, I’m tired of this pattern. Again.

And so, three strikes you’re out!

Now, let me address some arguments I saw.

Firstly, I’m sorry that this was the cause of someone else leaving this community. However, there are somethings that didn’t sit well with me. I’ve already discussed the design aspect, so I won’t get into it. However, the mentality of ‘because you are a popular artist it’s your job to be a role model’ really bothered me. Artists are human, and humans make mistakes, just because someone has a little bit more of a broader audience, does not suddenly make you get PAID to be a behavioral role model. Did I make him feel bad? Yes, and I don’t feel great about it, but I felt it was necessary for him to learn his mistakes. Did I humiliate him? No, humiliating him would have been me publically posting my opinion and scolding him in public. He decided to let everyone know about this and a public issue, not by my hand. However, I’m not mad at you for not holding my opinion and stance nor do I feel any dislike towards you, you’re allowed to think your opinion. Again, I apologize for being part of the cause you departing from this community, and I very much hope you the best of luck in the future.

I also saw someone note that since these are based off of Araki’s characters and so these are technically not our designs. Which can be semi true, for a couple events, I straight up used Jotaro’s design but put different clothes and bam I call him an event character. I won’t call someone copying me if they also draw Jotaro in the same set of clothes that I drew him in. However gijinkas are somewhat different from that. We use the concept of the character as a basis for a new character, and basically morph the basis into a new character. Stand Gijinkas and Human Standjinkas??? are a different territory in general because of this. There’s a difference between having inspiration for a character, and copying entirely. Is there heavy influence from Jojo characters? Yes definitely. Are we stealing from Araki himself? No, because we are making our own concepts based on another concept, designers do it all the time. Two concepts that look identical, not looked happily upon. 

And because I see people jumping into this argument, even though they haven’t seen the image itself, please know the context of both sides before assuming otherwise.

And lastly, I want to address Mod Jota himself. I’m aware I blocked him but I’m sure he can see through anonymous, if he really wanted to.

I know you’re still young and you still will make your mistakes. And that’s fine, as long as you learn from them.

What I do not like is how you are avoiding the blame at this point. You said you’re distressed about the situation and don’t want to further discuss this in public, yet once one person praising you, you immediately discuss more about it and you don’t seem very sorry about this at all, and you seem more annoyed I’m not complying with you. Screaming and cursing is not feeling sorry. Shifting the blame on a 'coincidence' is not sorry. And then trying to be like Mango is over reacting and 'it should'nt have gone as bad as it went'? Not a very apologetic move. Not only that, there’s been other situations where you don’t listen to criticism and have this victim mentality. If you are at fault, look at your actions and try and see why someone is being this harsh, and how to correct it. Pouring more research into things comes a long way, especially when designing concepts. I don’t hate you Jota, I’m just tired. I hope you the best of luck in the future and I pray you grow from this, but I don’t think I’m patient enough to see it happen. This will be my final word on this stance, because I don’t want to prolong this drama with what I have already done, I just wanted to say my side of this discussion, and that'll be all. 

Have a nice day everyone.

[chickenfetus]

all moongan

thank you for asking falen tbh i love u sm and i love doing these 

omg is this ask for this ask meme i literally almost posted this along with the wrong ask fml

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?

more cereal than mik because.. i dont eat cereal with milk……… i love the crunch

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day?

as someone who lives in a tropical country is that what its called idk we dont have seasons and it never gets lower than 25 degrees so yes that would be ideal

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books?

hrmmmmm… i just remember the page number?? or try to lmao if i dont remember i just skim through the pages and try to recognise where i left off

4: how do you take your coffee/tea?

with at least 2 packets of sugar tbh…. i dont drink coffee

5: are you self-conscious of your smile?

omg story time i went 2 get my braces removed and the dentist wanted to take pics so he was like “smile with your teeth!” and i was like ok! but then he kept saying i wasnt doing it right lmao… guess whos never smiled b4… (me) so he told me 2 practice my smile lol i didnt answer the qn but ya,,, i am probably

6: do you keep plants?

i used 2 be very against plants… now theyre okay i guess i dont rly keep any

7: do you name your plants?

refer 2 6

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?

art??? i havent drawn in awhile

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?

no LOL

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?

on my side!!!! i cant sleep on my back bc i gotta hug smth.. and my stomach is out of the qn

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends?

🅱️… and .. same brainwaves…. poor mans ____…. this is all from the shady hq im so sorry my other pals

12: what’s your favorite planet?

the moon for no real reason

13: what’s something that made you smile today?

hMMm, watching astro and mx perform??? and just being shady with bell lmao

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?

this… question,,,..so im thinking of a bright place with white walls and translucent curtains so the light call fill the (living) room perfectly and everythings really ??? sunny and shit idk its warm… the floor’s made of (fake?) wood and theres a small kitchen bc i cant cook and idk if my friend would be able to lol.. theres 2 bed rooms both are painfully small but it works.. theres one other room with a closet for clothes… the bathroom is just a shower, sink and toilet… theres no washing machine rip and ?? thats about it poor mens life

i watchd the like we used mv again and i realized ...... that is literally where i got this imagery from thanks the rose i love a relatable band

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!

heres a fact (?) from me first: it rains diamonds on one planet ?? mecury maybe?? mars??? whomst.. this isnt even a fact its ,me trying to recall shit

ok real fact: There are thousands of other planets out there. sorry lads this website doesnt wanna have fun

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish?

is spaghetti bolognese a pasta dish

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?

im chill with my current hair colour??? bc its brown sometimes idk shitty hair

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.

i asked my irl friends (group name: panic support group) and this is what they said

K: everything

E: when u were one hour late (i dont remember this happening but i do know im always late but never for an hour past me wyd)

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it?

goDD i dont but i sure want to

20: what’s your favorite eye color?

this is strange but every eye colour is my favourite although ppl with two or more colours in their eyes are so cool

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces.

its just my school bag lmao i got it 4 years ago and i take it everywhere even if the event is “small” and they ask us to bring “smaller bags” ill bring my big ass school bag anyway it looks like this (i dont have to but linking stuff is so fun)

22: are you a morning person?

technically.???its the holidays but i still manage to get up before 10 (most of the time) and … even if i have like 5 hours of sleep i manage to feel awake really easily????

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?

tf i just use my phone lmao this is what ive been doing for like a month now… i could watch every vlive i havent watched yet, i could make video compilations i could practice my art but… even though im out of school im still procrastinating.. legends only

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?

mmmm falens the closest to that

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into?

my classroom

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit?

white converse??  i have 2 get new ones every like 2 years since theyre also my school shoes and break easily….. other than those i have my blueblack converse too (i dont wear them as much so theyre still in one piece)

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor?

i dont eat bubblegum bc im always afraid ill swallow it and die and im p sure its illegal here

28: sunrise or sunset?

sunset but i dont look outside enough for either

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing?

hm……… with jen its when she sends me asks on anon despite it being super obvious like im not a Fan when my friends send me asks on anon bc sometimes i cant tell and i get a sense of false hope but w/ jen its okay but i know its her

with bell its when they reply to my keyboard smashes with their own keyboard smashes lmao and when they just??//?? say smth cute abt their faves (lately its been sanha thank u sh)

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared?

ya lmao when i have 2 sleep alone and its completely dark i have half a mind 2 believe some random supernatural being is out for me

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.

hmM. socks are great i always wear them bc i wear shoes almost every time i go outside… i dont have any weird socks bc im Boring but i have 3 pkmn songs and 1 gudetama socks/.. bUT I DID buy my friend those socks with individual toe pockets… it was so funny when my other friend saw it she choked on her drink and almost spat it out. we laughed so hard we hit our heads against each other i love friendship.. i have 2 wear white socks for sch bc… aesthetic? god if i know lmao….. i only ever wear ankle socks bc….. socks any higher than that? cancelled.

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.

listen ive never stayed up later than like 1am ok maybe 2am??? but i was working on like a project that was due the next day for school with my groupmates (friends) so does that count lmao

33: what’s your fave pastry?

bread………. sugar donuts…….. i am Aware that thats not how u spell it but wtv

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

why does this ask so many qns in 1 qn……. i had a cat?? it had pink stripes and it didnt have a name bc i dont name my stuff… even my pokemon.. and yeah i still have it except its in a big dusty bag where all my other toys are kept

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often?

i kinda have to use stationary for school so ya.. p often is correct… pretty pens??? i dont rly see the point whoopS!!! in exams u can only use black or blue so

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now?

im listening 2 day6 so like day6

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean?

my room isnt even my room i just go there to sleep .. the place im always at is like a study area except its open?? so everyone can see me lol and . its not messy?? if u look at it from far but the shit on the desk and shelves are so fucking messy god i need to pack those

38: tell us about your pet peeves!

aLRIGHT LADS welcome 2 megans ted talk

(skip this if ur not fond of drama)

so something (refer to the song he said suits myday) happened with jae recently and ive seen fans trying to defend him by @ing him and saying that they love him which is fine - great even! but what i dont approve is how everyone’s basically forgotten about the whole matter because they had concerts so instead of @-ing him and asking him to explain himself, they tell him what a great concert it was which is also great bc their concerts are honestly amazing. basically my pet peeve is when ppl dismiss the problematic action of some people just bc they like them.

another thing is that there were some fans who started guilting others for wanting to drop day6 completely because of what jae did and in my opinion i think it is totally cool to want to drop a group if they did smth bad like??? its ur life???? u can choose who you want to like. what is not cool is pulling out all the good things the person has ever done in their entire life and try to remind others about the positive sides of the person. yes. they’re an encouraging person, etc. but that does not cancel out the bad things they’ve done until they explain/apologise. what is infuriating is just the manner some people took it?? they literally went ahead and tweeted shit like “would your parents drop you if you did smth wrong?” and “you’re seriously gonna drop someone whos been nothing been nice because of one incident?” yes. people will and you dont have any fucking right to stop them? so dont go pulling out receipts.

another thing. its also okay to want to stan the whole group even if someone has done smth problematic. like? to me youre cool if youre able to see and acknowledge the bad shit someone has done and still stand by their side while educating them at the same time its nice to have faith in your idols. however, i wont say much when your idols dont respond and/or respond in a way that shows absolutely no remorse. its cool if you want to support them too, despite that.

tldr; dont fucking excuse someone’s behaviour/action just because youre so far up their fucking ass. dont pull out shit from before either, be it good or bad. and lastly, its okay to want to drop/continue supporting them, its your life.

i just wanted to talk about this tbh,, it was nice to see a few mydays trying to urge jae to explain the whole situation but seeing as he still hasnt and couldve it really irks me :-/

okay update its been a day and i havent really thought about this but im kinda conflicted now bc jae still hasnt talked about the song and im probably just making a big deal out of smth that will never happen again but it really doesnt sit right with me knowing that jae recommended that song to his fans and said it suited mydays?? bc looking at the lyrics... i SURE hope not... idk i have neither forgiven or forgotten but he’s okay now.? i cant stay mad at someone for that long anyway ill never forgive him 4 it though lmao petty ppl only

another thing... jae’s still an amazing person to me with all the encouraging words he says to mydays but this one incident is just soOOOOO hrm and i did go off tangent with the question as usual lol

39: what color do you wear the most?

i wear a lot of colours tbh??? but bc its rly hot out ive just been wearing the same shirt every time i leave the house and its black so

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you?

i dont wear jewelry rip

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving?

challenger deep

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it!

hm,, ive only ever visited this coffee shop like more than once bc the girl i used 2 like showed it to me b4 like 2 years ago and it was nice i liked their mocha frappe and its cozy i guess??? sometimes i go there with friends to study/just eat but i havent gone in awhile.., its two stories and it has an open air sitting area too i prefer sitting inside bc the sun is a big no thanks.. the ceiling is kind of like?? going downward?? like the kind iin attics???? idk man it was nice

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with?

u cant see shit here sorry

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything?

cant relate

45: do you trust your instincts a lot?

yea?? sometimes i just gotta bc my brain wont shut the fuck up

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of.

suddenly all of the puns i know have left my mind thanks @ me

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

vegetables

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today?

the dark and whats basically in it???? like ghosts zombies and shit u kno the scary shit

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

i like buying albums?? theres a CD in those so it counts lmao i bought sunrise by day6

50: what’s an odd thing you collect?

boxes??? like containers????

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them?

boxy and letting go by day6

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far?

YOU KNOW I HAD TO DO IT TO THEM and oh worm

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them?

me: rocky.. ?????? from astro.. /?? no ive never heard of any of those and i saw the word horror so u wont hear abt those from me any time soon

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?

i literally havent been outside for 2 days

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point?

be petty aka yesterday i changed my twitter icon from jae 2 brian bc jae’s being a child rn so hes out

56: what are some things you find endearing in people?

when they ramble abt smth they like thanksk buds

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics?

is this the song from p!atd i have it in my playlist lmao oh i fucing hate this song i always skip it im not listening

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why?

idk what either of those are but bell and boxy

59: what’s your favorite myth?

idk any

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

anything that eunwoo has ever written

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?

ive given eggs for karissa’s birthday b4 and i got a kermit its not stupid tho its just the closest thign i could think of

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?

i drink water juice everyday every minute every hour

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?

my books are all in shelves lads i just  heard the fucking keys rattle im not doing this shit im logging off night

ok day 3 and im back like i said previously my books are on shelves i tried rearranging them by series b4 but my housekeeper rearrnaged them randomly the next day so i gave up

i make playlists for songs that i like, really like (i still skip them sometimes rip) and songs that my friend recommends me i have a seperate playlist for the songs i like in japanese 2

64: what color is the sky where you are right now?

light blue?? like its actually p white bc its cloudy

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with?

m not rly

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like?

just. leaves maybe??

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?

Horror Movie

68: what’s winter like where you live?

oh winter is fucking fantastic it never gets colder than 25 degrees celsius here and if it does rain it lasts for like 10 minutes

69: what are your favorite board games?

i used to rly like snake and ladders and monopoly :-o

70: have you ever used a ouija board?

im not ready for that kinda death

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea?

english breakfast or earl gray??? those r like the standard right

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it?

ya but i never do bc i either forget to or am just 2 lazy

73: what are some of your worst habits?

being lazy + procrastinating :-D

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.

okie :-o ..

they’re great ok ive talked abt them like 10 times in the span of 2 months but whatever folks

they’re super nice, kind and just all of the positive adjectives out there in the dictionary ...... they’ve helped me multiple times and they’re always there 2 lend me a listening ear (or in our case, eye lmao) idk??? im just super comfortable around them always and im honestly so thankful we became mutuals (and subsequently friends) last year!!!! i cant say a lot bc ill just get v repetitive but overall they’re an awesome friend and im glad we still communicate daily via twitter and sometimes our skype sessions even if they’re kinda awkward bc i never know when 2 talk bc im scared ill speak and theyll say smth and itll turn into a MESS which actually happened lmao  

im looking forward to the day our skype sessions become super smooth and easy going!!!

75: tell us about your pets!

i have none but id die for boxys cats

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t?

well yeah always tbh but its not smth i have to do but more like want to do im just 2 lazy to get around doing it

77: pink or yellow lemonade?

?? i almost said lemons arent pink but i Remembered...... yellow lemonade

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?

i feel like this is an Attack? okay LISTEN so story time again.

on the flight back from japan i watched the alien covenant and i couldnt even get past the scene where the baby alien was gonna kill the poor guy who ended up being locked up with the infected dude as soon as i saw the blood and the alien emerge from the guy’s back i bolted lmao

so to calm myself down nd block that memory from my mind i went ahead and watched despicable me 3.. which HONESTLY im the worst critic ever but in my humble opinion.... the movie was good????????? idk i didnt watch minions the movie though i got lazy again whooopS!

anwyay i sidetracked but im neutral im not a fan but i wouldnt go out of my way to call minions annoying?? bc they really arent? i feel like its only seen that way bc of how people make posts abt how annoying minions are even tho.. they arent??

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?

my memory hates me so every specific thing my friends have ever done for me has left my mind but .

the cutest thing? everything my friends do for me

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?

theyre yellow and no i didnt theyve been there ever since i could remember

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.

lava cake

82: are/were you good in school?

yeah i was good in school for like the first three years and this year i just flopped so badly lmao and its my important year too oh well my exams r over and i still dont have a backup plan in mind

83: what’s some of your favorite album art?

all of dance gavin dance’s albums have awesome art

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?

back when i was really into 5sos i thought of getting a tally since that was their logo at that time but now no not really unless i decide to get lance’s face tattooed onto my forehead on impulse

85: do you read comics? what are your faves?

im keeping up with hq, bnha and tg manga!!!!

86: do you like concept albums? which ones?

idk what those r but sure

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?

big hero 6

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy?

who wrote this whats up with these questions

i googled and.. not really?? they all look nice

89: are you close to your parents?

close enough to stand being in the same room as them but not close enough to want to initiate conversations

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities.

tokyo was really cool (literally) and if i ever go again id love to go with friends so we can explore more??

91: where do you plan on traveling this year?

japan was supposed to be the only plan for this year but my grandad passed away so i had to go to malaysia multiple times earlier this year ik this wasnt the qn but ive already went to the planned destination tm so

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?

BARELY SPRINKLES A PINCH im anti cheese

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most?

um. like?? i tie the sides of my hair that cover my face back??? bc i dont like hair in my face

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday?

bell

95: what are your plans for this weekend?

hopefully something useful

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?

i also click remind me tomorrow lmao

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?

infp-t, capricorn, hufflepuff (same as falen nd jen yay)

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it?

uh ive never been hiking and i dont plan on it sorry body

99: list some five (or id never shut up) songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.

currently......

when you love someone - day6

like we used to - the rose

crazy sexy cool - astro

death of a strawberry - dance gavin dance

if it means a lot to you - a day to remember

idk if these actually “resonate to my soul” they just sound nice

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?

oh worm.. i wouldnt miind either???

i know i have 2 choose but like

if i go back into the past i could be less annoying?? but the past has actually helped me be the way i am today and i think im learning to be a better person?? im definitely way better than how i was previously 5 years ago and im just grateful i was able to learn from my mistakes???

so i wouldnt go back to the past.

if its in the future i can see how ill end up and if its not good i might end up being able to change myself so i dont get my “bad end”..???? maybe or i can just see what happens in the future and i can look forward to it

itll also give me a chnace to have the most fun while i can if its not too nice

so my decision is to go to the future

thank you so much for asking falen god this got so long lmao

[yaldev]

Sketchy Back-Alley Crystal Ball Reading

"Aran? Here for the reading?"

"Yeah, I hope I'm not too early."

"No no, come in."

New technology has made the ancient art of divination easier than ever, inviting a new supply of swindlers to meet the demand. There will always be those who fear change, and others are glad to capitalize on that. Aran knows he's being exploited, but he'll take false hope over no hope at all. He already paid in advance, so he might as well try to enjoy the experience.

Yet each step down the wooden stairs furthers Aran's regret of ever coming to this women's basement office. The lighting is low-quality everywhere on the bad side of town, but this place is particularly dark. He hopes it's because she needs to save power which the crystal ball needs, but his skeptical side insists that it's to make the illusion harder to decipher. Boxes of products stored by the proper business upstairs crowd around many of the walls. The furnace's hum is annoying, but soon enough his ears will just tune it out.

"Is that the crystal ball?"

"Yes, the mystical treasure through which I will see Pelbee's future for you!"

Aran blinks, rolling his eyes beneath his lids. This sorcerer doesn't believe in Pelbee, he's certain of that. True adherents would have enough faith to follow the scripture that denounces all magic as an agent of chaos. She'd have enough respect for the law to find a legitimate career.

What she's doing isn't technically illegal. Engaging in direct magic is frowned upon and illegal in most cases, but an exception is made for using mana to power machines. The questionable loophole: claim that traditional trinkets are just machines like any other. The crystal ball in the middle of the shady room doesn't need to be connected to the power grid, but it gives the oracle some plausible deniability if accused. She isn't using divination directly, she's just using a machine she made.

Even other practitioners of magic condemn the use of crystal balls. They claim that magic can do many things, from showing the past to deciphering the present, but it cannot preordain the future. Fortune-tellers serve to further erode the already-bad reputation of their legitimate practice, and that these swindlers stand in the way of wizardry ever being legalized. The oracles tell the other mages to stop gatekeeping and accept that magic-users will never be legitimized under Ascendant rule. The Empirical Truth can't stand them.

"No need to stand, take a seat." The fortune-teller courteously invites him as she lugs a chair from the corner toward the ball. She sets it at the perfect distance: close enough to see the show, but not so close that the audience can see any behind-the-scenes extras. Aran takes a seat, placing his arms on the rests. Sometimes he feels like his attitude makes things impossible: he wants to indulge in fantasies of the fantastic, but remains too skeptical to allow himself the pleasure. Sure, magic can power machines like any such force, but the idea of seeing the future with it is straight out of fiction.

The host stands on the opposite side of the mystical machine, takes a sandy substance from her pockets and starts to scrub her worn skin with it. It sticks in the gaps between fingers as she interlaces them and rubs her palms together.

"All part of the ritual." She justifies herself, putting exotic emphasis on the last word. "Now, what is it you seek? Be specific, I can't see the whole future at once."

"I'm having doubts about my girlfriend." Aran explains with fidgeting feet. "She's been acting different lately. She's normally so nice, but now she's so snippy and distracted."

"Hm, go on."

"Huh?"

"I said go on."

The glass ball has turned slightly pink. The fortune-teller runs her hands across an imaginary surface emanating from the sphere.

"I don't know, she talked to a guy we met one time and she's been becoming more like this since. I don't think she's cheating, but maybe she thinks she wants something other than me?"

"Yes..."

"Yes that you're listening, or yes that I'm right?"

Glowing clouds are materializing in the ball, swirling around each other like a tempest. Aran can't say whether it's really a property of the ball or if she just read a book about illusion magic once.

"Just talk."

"Alright, alright. I was thinking of marrying her, offering some jewelry. I picked this ring-"

"You picked that ring?"

"Uh, I picked a ring that looked nice. I have it here-"

"No need, I can see it."

"Alright, uh, I guess I'm just worried that it won't go so well. I hoped you'd be able to see what will happen, maybe give some advice."

No reply comes. The lights continue to flow, unobserved by her tightly shut eyes. The hands finally touch the orb, and the mists seem to flow towards her fingertips. They permeate the glass, flowing up the arms and creeping into the ears. If she's putting on a show, she's very good.

The sight is a marvel to behold, but it's accompanied by total silence. The world feels isolated and still, but Aran doesn't know the true feeling of emptiness until the furnace decides to shut off. What once seemed quiet is now contrasted by this total abyss, from which the oracle speaks her truth.

"Drop it."

"What?"

"Drop it. It's over."

"This reading, or...?"

"The marriage. You are doomed."

Her eyes open, shining a dull yellow matching the lights above. She continues.

"She will only keep changing from here. You are a fool to hang on to the past."

Aran shifts uncomfortably, raking his nails against the armrests. He's not quite sure how to respond, but takes a swing.

"I thought you're supposed to tell me that if I put in some effort and show her love, that she'll come back-"

"I am SUPPOSED to speak the truth, Spiritless!" She spits back with a harsh face.

Swing and a miss. The mystic calms down a bit, the light fading from her eyes.

"It delays the unstoppable. This path is hers, and you cannot follow her on it. Either you will let her pursue it, or she will flee you for it in her own time."

"But she's my sweet! My-"

"She is NOT YOURS! Nobody is yours! You cannot own someone! None own anything but the footsteps they leave in their path!"

Aran is speechless. Sound does not leave the throat, but water prepares to descend from the eyes. The swindler's expression softens. She is very aware of the world around her, but moments of self-awareness usually escape her. The powers in the crystal ball slow down and fade back to nothingness.

"I guess it's a good thing that you paid in advance. If you came looking for hope, I didn't give a good service, but maybe that means you can trust me."

Aran takes a deep inward breath.

"I got what I paid for. I guess if all fortunes were good, then good would just be normal."

"Very. You look uncomfortable, do you want to leave?"

"Yes, but I don't want to go back there."

The witch shakes her head. "You have no path but your own. Follow it. We think ourselves free as cars, but we are trains on rails. We can't stop, only proceed to the destination chosen for us since the tracks were laid."

"Yeah..."

Aran stands up and moves to pick up his chair, but she beats him to it and lugs it again towards the wall.

"Thank you." He says to break the silence.

"If you want my service again, you know where and when to find me. Now get home and cope."

A rude farewell, but Aran has too much on his mind to take notice. He leaves with a heavy heart, feeling increasing regret with each step up the wooden stairs.

Yaldev is a fantasy/sci-fi worldbuilding project based entirely on Beeple art. It is the story of a world in magical pandemonium, of the nation which rose to conquer it, of this empire’s inevitable collapse, and of the new world which emerged in its wake. The project has major themes about perspective, imperialism, nationalism, nature and the metaphysical battle of law against chaos. For all stories in order, check out the pinned post on the subreddit at r/Yaldev, or this album on the Facebook page!

[facets-and-rainbows]

Blue Exorcist: Spy Game (sneak peek!)

So Kazue Katoh posted a link on her Twitter to a preview of Spy Game, the new Blue Exorcist novel. And it was pretty fun! So I translated it. Enjoy!

WARNING IF YOU AREN’T PAST THE KYOTO ARC: THE ENTIRE PREMISE OF THIS STORY IS BUILT ON MANGA SPOILERS. TURN BACK. THIS IS NOT THE WAY YOU WANT TO LEARN WHAT HAPPENS IN VOLUME 12.

Shima Renzou was a realist.

Aside from acting unusually hyper around girls, he was a completely normal boy. He wasn’t passionate about anything besides the opposite sex; he felt everything was bothersome and just wanted an easy, happy life. He wasn’t an extreme optimist, but he wasn’t a complete pessimist either. In all his fifteen years he had never given a thought to the idea of blindly adoring something, of giving his loyalty or his devotion, let alone his life, to it.

And when he couldn’t accept the pressure he felt from everyone around him—he chose the life of a spy.

It was a late spring day, not long after he had started classes at True Cross Academy.

Shima walked through the door of the office in the Johann Faust mansion.

“Guten Morgen ☆ Welcome to my True Cross Academy.”

Lounging on a high-backed chair, Mephisto Pheles spread his arms wide. It was such an overdramatic gesture, but it suited him oddly well.  “Are you feeling at home yet?”

“Well…The school is nice, and there’s a lot of pretty girls. I’m having fun.”

“That’s good to hear,” Mephisto responded with a little smirk. He looked like he was enjoying this, from the bottom of his heart, but at the same time he seemed bored with everything. Shima returned a little meaningless smile.

Johann Faust V. Also known as Mephisto Pheles…

Of course, those were only two of his many aliases.

He was actually demon royalty—the King of Time Samael, one of the Ba’al and the second most powerful being in Gehenna. At the same time, he had served the Knights of the True Cross for roughly two hundred years as Director of the Japan Branch, and held the title of Honorary Knight.

You never knew which of his faces was the real one. Definitely a shady character.

And he was the one who had scouted Shima and asked to employ him as his own personal spy, seeing qualities in him that no one else, not even Shima himself, had noticed.

“Do you know, Shima-kun,” asked Mephisto, in a meaningful tone, “the most important thing to consider as a spy?”

He’s asking this now? thought Shima, who had already been through a good deal of spy training. The question caught him off guard, but he answered with confidence.

“How you’re going to deceive and trick your enemy.”

But Mephisto shot him down. “That answer will earn you, oh, about sixty points,” he said, wearily stifling a yawn. “What’s important is the information you gain by doing that. Sun Tzu wrote that information is vitally important in battle.”

If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles.

It was one of the most famous military strategy quotes out there. Even Shima had heard it before.

“You deceive and trick your enemy to obtain that precious information. To do this, you will at times need to be prepared to discard your family, your friends, and even yourself. In other words, you will need a strong mind, unswayed by anything.” He paused there for a moment.

“And so I’m assigning you three missions as training. Should you complete them successfully, I will give you this as a reward.” Mephisto slid a thick magazine across the desk.

Shima gave it a casual glance, and his expression changed instantly.

“!? I-Is that…” A high-pitched voice escaped his trembling lips. “No…there’s…there’s no way…”

Mephisto gazed calmly at Shima, who was obviously flustered, and gave an exaggerated nod.

“That’s right. An extremely rare magazine, said to be a collection of exclusive shots straight from the vaults of this Ero2King publication you love so much.”

“The-The one that disappeared from stores as soon as it was released?”

“Yes. Not only did it sell out immediately, it was deemed too extreme and never reprinted. Nowadays it’s a legendary issue, available only on auction sites with starting bids of 1 million yen—and this is the uncensored edition.”

“!! The…uncensored…edition, too?” Shima almost passed out from excitement right then and there, but he managed to get ahold of himself. He swallowed hard and lowered the tone of his voice a tad.

“Are you sure about this?” he asked with a naughty smile. “Isn’t it…kind of an ethical issue for someone who’s technically the principal to be flashing something like that at a student? I mean, technically you’re supposed to be an educator…”

“Well. I am a demon, after all,” Mephisto answered, nonchalantly.

“I’ll follow you for the rest of my life!” Shima responded, his eyes brighter and clearer than ever before. “I feel like I could go bungee jumping without the bungee cord for you right now.”

“That would just be suicide. …I assume this means we have a deal?”

“Of course!!”

Mephisto’s eyes narrowed to slits as he grinned. There was peril in those eyes, but only for a moment.

“Now, on to business. Can you tell me some of your weaknesses?”

“………Girls.” Shima’s instincts sensed danger, and it took him an unnaturally long time to respond. “Cute girls are my biggest weakness.”

“Oh?” Mephisto tilted his head theatrically. “Didn’t you say just a moment ago that you were enjoying the Academy because of all the cute girls here?”

“…No, see…” It was a painful blow, but Shima didn’t back down. “It’s because they’re my biggest weakness that I’m so drawn to them. Teenage hormones, you know?”

“Hehehe…very well, then.”

When he was done chuckling suggestively, Mephisto excused himself and took out his phone. He talked with someone for a while before merrily hanging up, then wheeled around to face Shima again.

“You’ll be accompanying Okumura-sensei on an assignment. This is your first mission.”

“Hm? With Okumura-sensei?” “Yes.” “What kind of assignment?” “A very easy one. ☆ Very easy!”

It’s a strange truth of the world, that being told something is easy again and again actually makes it sound more suspicious. But…

“Ero2King. Exclusive shots. Uncensored edition.”

“Of course I’ll go!!”

You just had to say the magic words, and Shima Renzou, avatar of desire that he was, was helpless to resist…

“Shima-kun, over here!”

“Oh. Okumura-sensei!”

Shima arrived at the designated spot to find his exorcism cram school teacher, Okumura Yukio, waving at him. Yukio was tall and slender, and his jet-black exorcist’s uniform looked good on him. He wore glasses on a face that wasn’t too flashy but was well-proportioned, and he definitely looked intelligent. And he always acted so calm and gentle. No wonder all the girls fell for him.

Then again, he always seemed like a worn-out middle manager even though he was only fifteen. Maybe that was why Shima rarely felt jealous of him. There’s no telling how you’ll be blessed in life and how you’ll be cursed—although if you said that to him it probably would have made him mad.

“Look at you, Sensei, at work on a Saturday like it’s no big deal. Must be tough. I think they call people like you ‘wage slaves’, you know?”

Yukio frowned as Shima came sauntering up to him. “Of all the things to do, I can’t believe you graffitied that bronze statue of Sir Pheles. What are you, a child?”

”Wha- oh. Hahaha. I just kinda did it on a whim…And Okumura-sensei, you do know we’re still kids, right?”

“Okay, then what are you, suicidal?” Yukio sighed, then muttered, “But still, sending a Page to fight…”

I get it. So that’s the story, huh?

Yukio must have been told that this poor unfortunate Page had angered the principal and been sent here as punishment. No one who knew anything about Mephisto’s personality would find that too out of the ordinary.

Now that he understood, Shima laughed meaninglessly and tried to smooth the situation over. He didn’t want to raise suspicion by saying anything weird.

“Our assignment is to clean out a building…” Yukio began to explain, with a look of resignation.

The building in question was an abandoned factory on the outskirts of Northern True Cross Town.

It was hard to tell how long it had been since it was used, but the large, dark grey factory towering before their eyes smelled of dust, mildew, and rust, and you could have used it for a horror movie set without even having to change anything.

“The factory used to belong to one of the best sweets companies in the business, but there was a terrible dispute among the owner’s family over would inherit the company, to the point that there was a suicide.” Apparently they had been plagued with misfortune after that, and profits declined. The company had gone out of business about a year ago. A while later, rumors had started circulating that ghosts wandered the abandoned factory every night.

“So it’s haunted by the ghost of the person who committed suicide?” “No. There was a preliminary investigation that didn’t find any ghosts. But a huge number of Coal Tars have spawned here; they were probably mistaken for a ghost.”

That’s it? Shima thought, taken aback.

Coal Tars were the weakest of all demons. Most people couldn’t see them, but they were floating around everywhere all the time. As long as they didn’t group together and fuse, they weren’t dangerous at all.

“They hadn’t found a buyer for the factory because of that, but now the president of an entertainment company wants to buy it as-is, so we’re just cleaning out the demons first.”

As he finished explaining, Yukio reached into the large sports bag at his feet and pulled out a portable sprayer labeled “HOLY WATER” and a few spare tanks.

“We’ll be using these.”

“Oh? Kinda reminds you of a certain ghost-fighting movie, doesn’t it? Pretty awesome♪” Shima took the sprayer and tried to strike a cool pose with it. “So I just have to get rid of the Coal Tars with this thing?”

But Yukio shook his head curtly.

“…No. There are a lot of the coal tars. We don’t know yet if there’s a Koks among them, so I’ll handle them.”

“Huh? Then…what am I supposed to do?”

“You’ll be taking care of the Chuchi.”

“Huh- What was that?”

“Chuchi.”

Shima went pale and started shaking. Yukio looked away awkwardly.

“There aren’t many of them, but some are possessing cockroaches. Try to concentrate on those. Now, if I remember correctly, you want to be an Aria, right?”

“!! I’ve got a stomachache, I’m going home!” Shima screamed. He tried to make a break for it, but Yukio grabbed him.

“Wha- Let go!”

“I’m sorry. I can’t.”

“Why not?! You could do this job by yourself in your sleep! For the love of God, let go of me!”

“I would love to do that, but I’m under strict orders from Sir Pheles to have you deal with the Chuchi.”

“!?”

“I was also told not to let you run away under any circumstances. He’s threatened to cut my salary to one tenth of what it is now if I take mercy on you and let you go, so I’m sorry but…”

“One tenth? What kind of shady operation is he running?! Okay, but you can’t just sell out one of your beloved students over a little pay cut!! The Okumura-sensei I know would stand up to a threat like that to protect his students! Right? Right?!”

“I’m sorry. I’m not sure I would use the term ‘beloved student’…” Yukio mumbled with a pained look on his face. “Besides, I need to make ends meet.” Not only did he start out casually saying something awful, he finished up with a line straight from a tired old man.

“Just remember, you brought this on yourself.”

“Okumura-sensei, you’re inhuman!! I hate you!! I’ll always hate you!! I’m gonna tell all your fangirls you’re a horrible person with weird fetishes!! I’ll tell them all!!” Shima cried, out of his mind with fear.

“────────” 

It was like someone had flipped a switch inside of Yukio. He shouldered the sprayer and started dragging Shima along behind him, his face like a mask.

“Nooooooooooooooo!! I’m sorry!!!!! I didn’t mean it I didn’t mean it Ididn’tmeanit!!! Forget I said that!!!!! Forget that!!! Let’s just calm down and talk about this!!!! Okumura-sensei!!!!”

“I’m sorry, it appears I’m inhuman, so…”

“I said I didn’t mean it!!!! I was kidding!!! Please!!! Please don’t!!! Heeeeeeeeeeeeellllllllllp!!! Somebody!!!! Bon!!! Koneko-saaaaaaaan!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—

A pained scream echoed through the abandoned factory, and was cut short.

[asherlockstudy]

THE SIX THATCHERS: the deliberate flaw of an otherwise brilliant episode

This post is:

an explanation of the episode from my viewpoint

a review

an analysis of Mary’s character and its point in the narrative

a comparison with previous episodes

an analysis of the dynamics of the third series

my eternal faith in Moftiss being restored again

basically a lot of things

There are only two problems in the Six Thatchers or, better, two categories of problems. The first could be avoided and unfortunately caused frustration to both avid fans and more neutral viewers. The second is deliberate, not because Gatiss wanted necessarily to confuse the fandom, but simply because it couldn’t be avoided and it would longterm serve the main plot. Allow me to explain:

The first problem is the direction. To be completely fair, direction is not always bad and I certainly do not mean the imagery (the shark scene after Mary’s death is a piece of art). It certainly improves after the middle of the episode. But the first half of TST is a crazily paced, exhausting editing or perhaps butchering of various different scenes that the viewer would probably wish to enjoy for a little longer. I understand that the episode had to deal with a lot of different threads of the plot (the present and the past) but perhaps it would be a wiser choice to get a few extra minutes like they did with the Final Problem. The fast pacing doesn’t allow us to feel engaged in what is going on or get once again properly attached to the characters. It also complicates our earnest efforts to understand the plot, especially since TST is in no way one of the easiest Sherlock stories to grasp. I include in this category a slight fall I might have noticed in the chemistry amongst all the actors - hopefully it’s because of the lack of undisturbed screentime together. 

The second flaw is the cause of all the chaos in the fandom and beyond, the cause of all the vastly different theories and the cause of all the contradictory reviews. I think I might have never seen another movie or TV episode get so many 2 star and 10 star ratings at the same time! 

Well, without taking into consideration personal tastes (i.e. how much someone invests in Mary being a villain) the main objective problem that has caused all the mess is this one:  TST does not follow the plotline of His Last Vow. It does not bind well or even barely fits in the concept of HLV. It does not answer the questions His Last Vow raised. But you know what? No first episode of any Sherlock series ever did. 

A Scandal In Belgravia ended the pool scene of The Great Game in a rushed messy way and continued without ever bringing this issue back or analyzing Moriarty’s behaviour at the pool. 

The Empty Hearse joked around and frustrated the fans by completely avoiding to explain what truly happened in The Reichenbach Fall.

The Six Thatchers focused on Mary’s ambiguous character. Offered insight into her past and the ghosts haunting her, the inevitable conclusion of the life she chose and completed her story arc (?) with a, honestly, beautiful redemption scene. But, as ever, remained silent as to why really Mary shot Sherlock, why she was so terrified of Magnussen’s blackmails if she truly believed the rest of the agents had died, why she always looked so alarmed every time Moriarty’s name was mentioned. Basically remained silent about everything that truly confuses and intrigues the fandom - Why?

Could it be that Moftiss are so bad at creating decent first episodes? Nah.

I have made a post about it: The decompression of the Sherlock cliffhangers has not started yet. It’s the same old thing happening once again with The Six Thatchers.

What I think must be accepted is that Mary was never meant to be a main character. She was never meant to be a main villain either. She’s technically not even the main villain in her villain episode where the official Big Baddie is Magnussen and, then, both of them get beaten in a battle of impressions by an MP and a bad video of Jim Moriarty.

In my opinion, there is a nuance that is almost never discussed: Mary’s character is not as important for the story as Mary’s involvement to what maybe is what we call the main plot. What I mean is that Mary as a character couldn’t stay longer, she shouldn’t stay longer, because this would inescapably lead to an imbalance of the successful concept BBC Sherlock’s showrunners had and A.C. Doyle had before them. Even if Mary was meant to be a Big Villain, this would be a rather quaint twist of the story. In case the show ends in a romance, this suggests that Gatiss and Moffat couldn’t think of anything else but make every woman or romantic antagonist a villain just to desperately defend that Sherlock and John’s relationship is a good concept. I’m fully aware Mary being a villain is one of the most popular and beloved theories but excuse me for saying that this kind of plot twist seems a bit childish to me. In my opinion, they have already made villains (canonically established villains) romantic antagonists but if they also made a romantic antagonist obligatorily villain by default, this would be laughable at the least and would expose Moftiss’ panic to prove that this gay relationship is good and ideal. And that’s my problem. You should never need to prove such a thing, let alone make a (female) character look bad so that your love story can look better. In whatever way I look at it, it’s a bad idea.

So why did they introduce Mary in the first place?

 Mary’s introduction was the best (or least bad) idea for Series 3. You need to have in mind that there is an ongoing basic plot. If the plot is heavily dependent on characters such as Jim Moriarty, Mycroft Holmes or even Sherrinford, then Gatiss and Moffat couldn’t proceed with it in the third series. If Jim Moriarty returned back from the dead at the same time with Sherlock, the plot would end up ludicrous. If Mycroft Holmes revealed his ulterior motives in Series 3 or if there was the main villain introduced for the first time at this point, the character development of Sherlock and John wouldn’t be able to catch up on time. In other words, if the Main Villain appeared in, say, The Sign of Three, the viewers wouldn’t be able to buy the importance of the character or understand what makes this villain comparatively more impactful on Sherlock and John’s lives than Jim Moriarty was in seven episodes. Whether Moriarty is alive and the main villain or not, Moftiss needed the time to build up the expectations of the viewers and also develop Sherlock and John’s relationship accordingly for a next level of drama. In short, they needed a break in which they would focus on Sherlock and John and refresh the need and the interest of the audience for a specific, consistent plot. They want to top their own game.

But the plot shouldn’t go back to what Series 1 was because then Series 4 would give the impression that it jumped out of nowhere. Moftiss didn’t wish lack of plot for Series 3 - they wanted it to be subtle and eventually build the expectations for the very dramatic and plot-wise specific Series 4. So they still had to move on and change the data between Sherlock and John. That’s where Mary got in. Mary is the most important feature of the most understated part of the plot. Admittedly, this means something that some people hate; Mary’s character was used for the sake of Sherlock and John’s relationship. True, but it’s unfair to call Gatiss and Moffat misogynists for that. Technically, 95% of the characters and plot points in BBC Sherlock first and foremost affect Sherlock and John’s relationship. Since the core of this show has always been the relationship between Sherlock and John, it is absolutely normal that most parts of the plot orbit around them and there is no need to wave fingers and call everything misogynistic. In my opinion, Moffat and Gatiss tried to exactly avoid such connotations by making Mary a very interesting, flawed, complex, shady, ambiguous, intelligent and competent character that after all brought a lot of dramatic changes in Sherlock and John’s lives. Moftiss upped the game very much compared to the original Mary Morstan of A.C.D canon. If they made her an one-dimensional character that suddenly died in childbirth to leave Sherlock and John go on with their lives, then yes, that would be misogynistic. 

Gatiss even darkened John’s character a lot in order to give Mary a very bold redemption arc in an episode where both Gatiss and Abbington play with the viewers’ impressions about Mary’s allegiances until the very end (and beyond...). The episode was focused on Mary and brought out the complexity of her character exactly in order to show the appropriate respect for her contribution to the whole story - but she was never meant to be one of the three - four characters that actually are the foundations of this story. In this way, Gatiss kept everything balanced. 

The Six Thatchers was a beatiful tribute to Mary but didn’t address the links of her character to the basic plot as this would reveal the story and its climax before its time. 

The Six Thatchers purposefully ignored: 

Why Mary tried to kill Sherlock although she genuinely looked regretful in TST

Why Mary was so terrified of Magnussen’s blackmails

Why Mary looked so alarmed every time Moriarty was mentioned

Why Sherlock decided to help her after realising she did try to kill him

Why after that incident, Magnussen started blackmailing an incapacitated Sherlock instead of Mary

Janine’s role

Why Sherlock came up with lies to support Mary in front of John

John’s ambiguous behaviour when he forgave her

Why Sherlock remains so adamantly protective of her 

However the Six Thatchers still hinted at:

John never truly trusting her anymore

Mary always fearing that Sherlock would eventually confront her for something other than her Tbilisi past (meeting him with drugs)

Mary again looking worried at the mention of Moriarty’s name

Mycroft admitting that he controlled AGRA in the past

Mycroft implying that he knows about Mary’s enemies and problems

Mycroft looking amused by it

Mycroft lowkey indirectly threatening her in front of Sherlock

So there are many things that I hope and think they remain intentionally untold.  Whatever is untold is what perhaps links Mary to characters like Mycroft, Magnussen and Moriarty (and Sherrinford maybe), so all these couldn’t possibly be addressed in the first episode because they would expose the core of the plot they keep so carefully secret for The Final Problem. Yet Mary as a secondary character with a predetermined end couldn’t stay as long as TFP and Gatiss dealt with this problem by giving the viewers a lot of insight into her character without answering the burning questions. 

Whoever Mary worked for, it doesn’t matter enough to change the validity of her redemption arc though. Think of it this way; it doesn’t matter who is a villain. What matters is whose pressure point Sherlock is. Whether Mary worked for Moriarty or Mycroft, by shooting Sherlock, both of them would eventually turn against her. Neither Mycroft NOR MORIARTY would want Sherlock dead, especially at this point. That’s why Mycroft looks almost amused at the thought of Mary having a permanent retirement and Sherlock darkly responds this will never happen while he is around. In a sense, Mycroft expresses his hate for what Mary has done but Sherlock keeps protecting and defending her. Whomever Mary was working for, she tried to weaken her boss by killng Sherlock. So perhaps she tried to destroy Moriarty or protect John from Moriarty that night. If Moriarty is alive, John is in constant danger as long as Sherlock is close to him and this fact doesn’t change, no matter if Mary worked for Moriarty or Mycroft. That’s the only way it makes sense to me but who knows. 

What’s important is that we will certainly learn more about her and how she was connected to the great scheme of things. This doesn’t mean that she’ll come back alive and I strongly doubt that the next episodes will make us change our mind once again about her allegiances. 

If this is the case, the plot of Six Thatchers couldn’t be better than it is. It is the evolution of The Empty Hearse for both episodes turn a blind eye to the requests for an explanation until the time comes for it. 

[kingofthewhatpod]

Fanfic Friday #3

Oh god, oh dear, oh no. This was supposed to come out last Friday, and yet it was delayed for a week without any news. I mean, I did technically tweet it last Friday but maybe anyone who follows me can forgive me because this week you get both? And.... er... I’ll try to do better? Maybe I’ll do another post on my real thoughts about Fanfic Friday, but if you’re reading this, and you just want to get to the good stuff, let me delay no more!

I return to Fanfic Friday’s roots (after only a single week off, ha) of seeing how I would teak a non-canon arc. Heck, maybe I'll have constructive creativity for a canon arc one day. But not this day. Because I was originally sending these out as tweets, my thoughts in places are brief. Adventure in the Ocean's Naval was fine. It was palatable. But I don't want a slightly overcooked hamburger and some fries. I want steak with garlic mashed potatoes.

Things I liked:

The mystery of the island, however short lived

The guardian monsters

Captain Joke didn't have friends like Luffy, and that was his downfall

Things that could be improved:

Usopp/Nami didn't do much of anything

Magic not explained

who cares about Joke?

As before, I'll keep the premise. Mysterious island, land of adventure? check. But this time, there's no octopus, no immediate fight. Luffy and Zoro andd the ship still fall down below because hijinks. (maybe Zoro is napping and doesn't keep a careful eye on Luffy, who gets bored and starts messing around on the ship, or he sees a cool bug. And him running around somehow dislodges the anchor long enough that they fall). So they all end up down below, and they meet a rather shady old man (think Jafar disguised as the beggar) who tells them about this wicked cool treasure of the gods. It's on the other side of the island if they're brave enough to get it. It is said to grant any wish.

Usopp and Nami are probably freaked out, Sanji would very calmly be like "who would fall for that?" but Luffy has decided to go check it out, and Zoro is just like "he's the captain." So they end up going, some more willingly than others Now, you'll notice this call to adventure is some kind of bad guy (you know what? Make it a poorly disguised oni. Everyone notices except Luffy), instead of some kid. Firstly, I'm usually not a fan of the kid characters- even if they're related to the deeper themes. But also, maybe there *is* a village down here, and they meet a crying Hamu who is like "don't try to go get the treasure! Even Captain Joke, the hero pirate of the village couldn't do it!" But why would that deter Luffy? Answer: it wouldn't.

Luffy could be all "Yeah, but I bet he wasn't as strong as I am. I'm going to be King of the Pirates." (King of the What Now?) Maybe Hamu comes with to watch this idiot in action, maybe he just stays behind. The crew will come back through for the ship anyways and they can tell him about their adventure. Now, they get halfway across a suspiciously empty field, when all of a sudden these stone walls come up from the ground, creating a labyrinth and separating the crew. Luffy might try to rocket up but there's some magical barrier. Also you can't go back the way you came, inwards!

Now, Luffy will basically get lost and increasingly frustrated. I cannot stress how funny this mental image is, as he yells and rampages but to no avail. I don't think the Straw Hats can hear each other. As I mentioned in episode 25 of the podcast, it'd be interesting if the Straw Hats faced off against the former Joke pirates. You get just enough characterization through dialogue and actions that you feel like you actually know this character. Also, I want to touch on the nature of the Joke pirates. Joke was betrayed, just like in the original. But instead of faceless shapes, there are 4 you can clearly see. Also the hint of *something* off-camera giving off a dark red light.

Spoilers: But because Joke's commanders were evil-hearted, they became tainted, causing their forms to morph and become... well, weird and monstrous. We can imply the other no-name members of the Joke pirates were killed in the labyrinth or by these commanders

Anyways. Zombie commander guys facing Luffy's crew one on one. Zoro first. He faces a man clad in weird armor (because One Piece), who constantly bangs on his breastplate, simply saying "Strong! Strong!" He's very bulky and has tusks. Maybe make him look walrus-ish. Anyways, he's very strong, and he hits hard. Zoro can't pierce his armor, and there's no obvious weakpoints. This guy's deal is that he just wants to be strong, as a dark reflection of Zoro's own ambition. He wants it so bad he'd sell out his captain to make a deal with a monster. Eventually Zoro wins, I think by using the butt of his sword to BANG right on the dude's helmet, and then breaking the monster commander's weapon, maybe burying him beneath the rubble created by slashing the walls  surrounding them. And of course Zoro gets a badass line. "What good is strength if you won't use it for your captain?" Because he is a GOOD, LOYAL BOY. Or maybe a comment on his enemy's internal weakness. "If you're too weak to stand and you get knocked down, stand up again even stronger"

Sanji's opponent: A rockstar with a wicked cool guitar and cool shades and a flashy jacket. Yes, I said a rockstar. This is One Piece which has all sorts of crazy character designs. Does it make sense that he has an electric guitar? Do I care? The ideological reason they're suited for each other is because this guy (maybe he's like a creature of the lagoon. Yeah that's it. He's more frog-ish) likes ladies but he's vain about it and only cares about himself (betrayed Joke because being a priate wasn't cool anymore). Anyways he fires actual music note shaped projectiles by strumming his guitar, and Sanji can't really get close at first. That is, until... maybe Froggy says he'll hunt down Nami? Yeah, and then Sanji kicks tthrough these weird music notes, runs forward and kicks him in the face! 

"Coolness can't be forced," Sanji remarks, adjusting his tie. "And no woman would ever want to kiss you." (Also, side note, I'm not a huge fan of the shonen trope of suddenly becoming stronger when someone is threatened. But I couldn't think of a way for Sanji to win otherwise. I need to get better at this. That’s what having a weekly schedule is meant to help with!)

Usopp's opponent: A squid looking guy who hides behind cover and always runs from battle. He betrayed his captain because he was afraid of what would happen if they continued their journey. Usopp tries to snipe him when he comes up from behind cover but Squid boy is very fast. Usopp wins by purposefully acting all angry and firing a bunch of his explosion stars, secretly taking out the cover further down the battle field until the next time squiddy tries to run he gets blasted in the back. "How can a man run from danger for his whole life?" He asks with a smirk. Bonus points if his knees are still shaking while he says it

Nami: She faces a fairy. Yes, a lady who got all shrunk by the monster's power. Maybe a flying sea horse-ish type design, to keep it aquatic. She, like Nami, is money obsessed, and didn't want to share her treasure with Joke. She's another agile one and shoots giant bubbles. Can Nami polevault with that pole of hers? Yeah, let's say she can. So she leaps over one of the bubbles and maybe throws a coin past the lady, causing her lady to quickly look away- unable to resist the allure of gold- just in time for a nice solid smack of the pole. "Try thinking about others once in a while" is Nami's line before she continues through the maze.

Now, it seems the maze is magic in nature (no duh), and the Straw Hats (minus their captain) have come out of the maze. And before them is the treasure. But before they can approach, the red light from earlier. oh no! It's the old man from earlier! (who could have guessed???????) He gets huge and reveals his true form, growing in size, saying he'll never give up his treasure. But before the battle can start, you hear it. CRACK! WHUMP! CRACK! Cracks are appearing on some part of the maze wall behind them. It explodes and in comes an enraged Luffy! Angry that he was lost for so long. Bonus points, Sanji kicks a piece of rubble that was going to hit him, Zoro cuts a piece that was flying at him, and the eternal butt monkey Usopp gets hit in the head.

Luffy: Who's this? Zoro: Dunno Sanji: That's the old guy from earlier. Luffy: Whaaaat?? Grandpa wasn't a good person?? Nami: Honestly, captain... Usopp: *recovered from the rubble* Hey, Luffy, what was that, you jerk!!!

Now, the point is that this monster likes to sow chaos. Just like in the original special, Joke was betrayed because he had crappy friends. And The Straw Hats seem incredibly disorganized. So the monster king grins. "How would you like to join me and I'll grant you your wish?" Zoro, Nami, Sanji, Usopp, each of them get all quiet and start walking over to accept the deal. Luffy is watching them, a look of mild confusion on his face. They stand right in front of the thing and the monster grins. "Good," he says. All four of them at once give him a solid whack, kick, shot, and slide. "As if!!!"  They cry in union. Luffy grins and punches the big creature in the gosh darn mouth. Well, probably the nose but I like to say "punch in the mouth"

He's not defeated *that* easily, and maybe if I spent more time rewriting and drafting this I could come up with an exciting narrative. The point is that the monster is too strong for even Luffy on their own, but they fight as a team.

You might think Luffy tends to prefer to fight alone, and maybe he does for a while. But the monster *could* wish himself stronger, and it could look like Luffy is about to lose when his crew mates save him, allowing him to prepare for an even stronger punch that will finish it. And of course the wish granting gem breaks. Of COURSE Luffy sends the monster flying and he smashes into the thing and it gets launched with him over the horizon or something. Of course everyone's mad but Luffy shrugs it off, since it's more about the journey than the destination So... yeah, that's basically it. Luffy comes back to the village, Hamu is like "How did you do it?" and Luffy just grins and is like "with help from my crew." And it's a sweet moment. Hopefully you liked it! I feel like this was the longest one yet.

Happy Friday everyone!