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babytaes · 3 years

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the grim reaper(my home)

summary: Everyone depicts the Grim Reaper as a bad character, but he didn't kill you. It's just a trip to the afterlife, and he's actually being helpful by walking you there. Consider what it would be like if you had to travel alone. As she battles through life, Jay meets an unexpected figure, yet she doesn't seem to be terrified of him when he comes knocking on her door, why?

paring: jay x female reader

genre: angst, slight fluff

word count: 6k

warnings: profanity, ummmm rock chic jay.

𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖗𝖆𝖈𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝖙𝖗𝖆𝖎𝖙𝖘: click me before reading!

➳ part of the drunk & dazed series

☆ ҉ ◢▅◣

I wish that everyone knew how their lives ended. It's essentially a game of guessing what will happen to you. Don't even get me started on the subject of Heaven and Hell. You've heard it all, the misery and the heinous methods in which people go out.

But why did death come knocking on the door at such an early age? You'll never know why they chose this age.

You didn't have your entire life laid out for you, nah, what a waste. Seeing it, however, was strange.

Well, there's him, or whatever entity they're referring to. The Grim Reaper.

You didn't notice him until things began to go wrong for you. A black object flashed in and out all of a sudden.

It was more predictable than unexpected.

Usually you would see him after work but I guess he had other plans. Despite your exhaustion, you flopped down on the couch and pulled out your phone to conduct an online search.

You giggled as you aimlessly scrolled through your phone and eventually peeked up to see a dark figure seated across from you.

As you laid your phone down and peered at the figure, you said, "So he finally wants to show his face."

“Don't tell me you can see me right now?” he cocks his head and looks about before returning to you.

“Well, I've only seen glimpses of you for the previous few weeks, but now I'm seeing you in all your glory.”

“Shit” As he hurriedly shot back into the dark shadows behind him, he widened his eyes.

“Wait a minute, don't leave.”

He was still there, hidden from view. He wasn't ready to leave yet. As you moved over to the door, you rolled your eyes at your phone and grabbed your apron. As you put your shoes back on, you exclaim and awkwardly wave your hand in the air before closing the door.

“You better be here when I get back, and keep in mind that we have business to discuss."

He rolled his eyes at your strange conduct as he smiled gently before vanishing back into the dark abyss, now entirely gone from your home.

---

“So Jay, what's on the agenda in Reaper business?” He noticed his old acquaintance gleaming at him as he peered up from his chair.

“Well, Jake, the previous several weeks have been a complete nightmare. They paired me up with this tough guy who was fighting for his life. As he continued, he rolled his eyes.

“It's been quite tranquil since they reassigned me to another case, but something strange happened today. I inadvertently made myself obvious to her, but she was unconcerned.

“Weird.” Jake shook his head and cocked his head to the side as he called out to him.

“So, two pieces of information I just got: it's a girl, and she appears to be somewhat odd. When you get back, I'd like to hear more about this."

As you put on a strange expression, he smiled at the boy as he spoke about jobs he had recently gone on.

“Yeah, there's something odd about it,”

“I also—wait a minute, Jay, I recognize that look.” Jake pauses in his speech for a moment as he approaches you and analyzes your body.

“Please, dude, take a step back.”

He hears on the intercom times for a meeting today for all Reapers to attend, and he laughs at you. Jake makes a peace sign as he hits the door's slab and vanishes from view.

Sitting back in your chair, you raise your feet and begin to formulate a strategy.

“What am I doing here? I'm a doer. Let me just return to her and have that conversation she requested.”

He steps into form and vanishes back to the house he used to be in, softly cheering to himself.

Surprisingly, he can hear your voice but not yet see you, so he emerges from the shadows and takes a stroll through your home, taking in your life.

He saw photos of dogs and people he assumed were family and friends, as well as one thing that attracted his attention.

As he approaches it, he enters a familiar room and sighs as he makes his way to the gleaming object. It was a bracelet with scribing on it of some type.

When he reaches out to pick it up, he feels a searing feeling and drops it swiftly, muttering a torrent of curse words.

“What the hell was that?” When he looks closely, he notices symbols that resemble a cross.

“Fuckin Christ,”

“Do all Reapers barge into your house and search through their belongings on the spur of the moment, or is mine defective?”

Jay, who has jumped up in panic, apologizes by turning around and raising his hands. When he glances up, he notices you resting on the door frame, arms folded, staring at him.

“Well, let's just put this inconvenience behind us and have that conversation you wanted to have, hmm?”

“All right, let's go into the living room, and by the way, your style is really fashionable. I had no idea you people dressed up so well to steal souls. Are there any employment openings?”

As he comes to a halt in his tracks, you turn your head to face him and stare at his unmoving form.

“Hellooo, please don't tell me they gave me a defective one. Jeez”

For a brief moment, everything came to a halt as Jay regained his bearings. "That was strange. Why am I blanking out because she's so strange?”

With a shake of his head, he smiles at you and walks into the living room, where he sits across from you, still perplexed as to who and what you are.

It wasn’t human-like.

“Thank you, no one seemed to realize that the original reaper gear wasn't cutting it for me. Also, I'm presuming you're a young adult, so you know what I'm talking about.”

You pull closer to him, laughing at his words, and lay your elbows on your legs, intently listening to him.

“So Grandma was right, you guys do exist. Tell me more; you know I don't appear to have much time left, so give me your answers.”

He let out a chuckle as he hastily covered his mouth, daring not to be affected by the earth.

He'd been doing this work for quite some time and appeared to be quite confident in himself and his abilities.

But there was something about you that made him feel comfortable and at ease, and he didn't feel like he had to hide, very apparent when a patient screamed at him or when they insisted death hadn't arrived yet.

It was strange, but it was great not to have to put on a show. Outside of the Reaper, he almost forgot who he was for a moment.

Maybe this one could get to know you, the cool yet elegant Jay. Not the dark version of himself. Even if his ultimate goal is to accompany you to the hereafter.

Maybe, just maybe, in that slim possibility, he'll take advantage of this opportunity to learn more about this person and why they're so interested in you.

---

“Before we jump right into this game, I have a question for you: why aren't you terrified of me?” As he stared at your blank expression, he spat out.

“Well, as I already stated, my grandma was a firm believer in the unknown. Even though she is no longer with us, she has taught me a great deal about the supernatural and unknown.”

You got up and walked over to the kitchen, motioning for him to follow you before opening the refrigerator and taking some fresh fruit out.

Jay promptly stood up and walked over to the chair, where he sat, watching your every move as you leapt onto the counter and turned to face him, before placing a mango slice into your mouth.

“All right, my turn, what's your name and what's my illness?”

Jay coughed and sat up straight as he removed a piece of paper from his pocket and read it loudly before setting it down.

“Y/N Y/L/N, you've been diagnosed with Heart Disease, and things aren't looking well for you. I know you haven't been to the doctor in a while, which is also perplexing. And my name is Jay.”

You place the fruit down next to you and cross your legs before responding to his comment, shaking your head up and down.

“Well, that's true; it runs in the family, but I'm not concerned because time is never on our side, and we all have an expiry date, which I believe is approaching soon. Right?”

Jay knew you just had one week left, but he didn't want to break your cheerful mood, so he waited.

“Well, I can't tell you when you'll die just yet, but your time is running out. I'm sure it's terrifying, but-”

Before concealing your lips, you chuckle loudly. Jay snickered as he looked up at you.

“Man, you're such a strange person; how do you manage to be so confident and direct? I'm becoming a little afraid, and I'm the Grim Reaper.” You leap from the countertop and walk over to him.

You cocked your head to the side and placed your hands on his face, pushing your face towards him. As you smile, his face flushes, and as he pulls away from you, he coughs before moving his hand to encourage you to continue.

“You have nice eyes, you know. Okay, now I'll tell you my story. Instead of countless questions, I believe it would be simpler.”

He just nods his head and lets you continue talking about your life.

---

As we all crossed the bridge into the next city over, you glanced out the window at the water. You'd always enjoyed being near water. It brought up memories of trips you and your grandparents took together.

When you arrived at your location, you grabbed your suitcase and exited the vehicle, leaving your parents behind.

“Are you sure you don't want to join us?” As they drove out of the parking lot and onto their vacation, you shook your head and waved farewell to them.

Even though you were 17, you still enjoyed going to your grandparents' house because it provided a sense of security that you didn't have at home. So you'd take them in a heartbeat.

Looking up, you notice Pops standing at the door, arms outstretched, waiting for you.

“There is my favorite grandchild.”

“Gramps, I'm your only grandchild,” you said, laughing as you took him in your arms and grinned as you stepped into the house.

“Oh, that's right.” He takes your stuff and starts to take it to your allotted room while laughing together. “Your Grams is out back,” he shouts as he approaches the top.

‘Thanks” When you walk out to the backyard, you'll find her sitting in her iconic chair, surrounded by books, muttering to herself. She puts the book down and leans in to hug you as she stands up.

“Aww, I've missed you so much. There's just so much you can talk about with your grandfather before he falls asleep. Please have a seat; we have a lot to discuss."

There's a sensation you've been missing, a sense of belonging to a place you once called home. They were the only ones who could supply you with a sense of safety and security, and you couldn't get enough of it.

“We talked about witches and wizards the last time we were here. Now we're dealing with Reapers, or more precisely Grim.”

When she stated those two words, your eyes lit up; it was a favorite topic of yours that she brought up frequently, but now you had more time to delve deeper.

“Let's get started; we've got a lot of ground to cover. Allow us to see The Unknown by opening our eyes. “Are you wearing your bracelet?”

“I never take it off,” you say. You shook your right arm and returned your hand to hers, shaking your head.

As you were swept away in a dark mist together, you grinned and took her hands in yours. Even though they appear to be ordinary, decent folks, there is something you should know about my grandparents. They are one of many people who have gained entrance to the supernatural realm, a place where anything is possible.

You tried to inform your parents, but they were skeptical of fairy tales. They tried to prevent you from seeing them, claiming that "they will stunt my growth," which is ridiculous because I've learnt more from my grandparents than from my parents.

Regardless of how hard they tried to stop you, you always managed to find your way back to them. We were linked, and nothing could stop you until YOU chose to let it. That day, however, never came.

You found yourself in a boat, holding your grandmother's hand, as it carried you across a vast chasm and into town. You come upon another boat that appears to be some kind of creature with a scythe. As he traveled down the river opposite you, strands of golden hair protruded from beneath his hood.

“Wait, don't tell me that person on the river was you now that I think about it?”

“I think it was, man, that was a long time ago,” Jay laughed and shook his head. Also, I had no idea you had access to that world?”

“Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get back to the story.” As you spoke, he grinned.

“All right, honey, let's go; we can't linger for too long.” You both stepped off the boat and walked into town, taking in the sights. As you climbed the slope, merchants' stands and buildings crept up on you. It was weird to see individuals of all kinds here, going about their daily lives in the same way that those on the surface did.

You see vampires, werewolves, angels, and even ghouls all lingering together and with one another as you walk side by side with your grams. Despite the fact that they all had their own lives to live, they could join together to gather supplies and meals.

What a wonderful thing

You both entered a familiar building, and your grandma greeted the old man behind the counter.

“Oh, my favorite customers. What brings you down here and how is life above the surface? Another book you have in mind.”

Your Grams smiled as she let go of your hand and approached the man at the front of the bookstore, “you always know Melvin.”

As they conversed, you strolled through the big store on your way to the second floor. Before reaching the top, you yell out to Melvin.

“I'm hoping you'll let me take one.”

“Anything for my sweet Y/N, go ahead and look, there's a new one up there.” You hurried up the steps and across to the Book Wall, grinning ear to ear. From baby dragons to spell books, there was something for everyone. Anything you can imagine Melvin’s shop had it all.

When you took one off the shelf, you were greeted by a young boy who stood next to you. You couldn't tell if he was your age since down here, time moves at a different pace than it does on the surface. Still he looked quite young.

It was pleasant to see the creatures up close, even if you had never met them before. You stepped away from him, afraid of his reaction, and made your way to the chair sections. You sat down and picked up a book titled "The Origins of Reapers."

“How did you get here? I've never seen a girl human down here before.” You looked up from your book to see the boy you'd seen previously, frightened that he'd do something. You closed your eyes and shook your bracelet in front of his face.

As he waited for you to settle down, he laughed and sat next to you.

“I'm not going to harm you; all I wanted to do was ask a question. My name is Jake, what is yours?”

“My name is Y/N, and my grandparents have access to the world, so I tag along occasionally, may I inquire what you are?” you said slowly as you sat up straight.

He shifted in his seat and grinned, his face more dog-like. How could you be afraid of him?

“Well, don't be afraid of me since I'm a Grim Reaper in Training. I'm fairly innocuous. It's nice to see a human down here; normally, we only see humans when it's their time.”

You hear your grandmother calling from downstairs before he can continue.

“Coming”

You return his gaze and apologize as you rise, book in hand, and make your way to the stairwell.

“It was a pleasure to meet such a lovely human; please pay a visit to the Reaper Realm when you return. Simply request Jake.” He gave you a wave before yelling at Melvin.

“I'm leaving Melvin; my book is on your desk up here.”

As you return your attention to Jake, you hear Melvin's remark, but he vanishes into thin air as you descend the steps. Your grandmother expresses her gratitude to Melvin for the choice and exits through the front door.

“Are you all set to depart, sweetie?” With a shake of your head, you bid Melvin farewell as you close the door and return to the boat, where you sit down and take your gram's hand in yours.

"Let's go home," says your grandmother.

---

“So yeah, I've been traveling there with them ever since they introduced me to your world.” You came to a halt in the middle of your walk and coughed, wiping a tear from your cheek.

“My grandparents died a few years ago, and I haven't been back in a long time because I used to only go with them. It was doubly difficult because they both died on the same day, and she was telling me that she could see him on that day. I'm hoping she meant the Reaper, because they were the last thing to see them leave.”

You grabbed his arms on the spur of the moment and violently shook them.

“I know you must have records someplace, but could you please assist me in locating them as part of my dying wish? At the very least, let me see where they went; I need to know if they're okay.”

So this was the true you, the one in desperate need of a reconnection with the Gone. You received your response and devised a plan.

“Hey, don't worry... I'll see what I can do. But there's no guarantee. I wasn't on the case at the time, so I'll have to do some digging, but I'll try. “Can you tell me their names?”

Wiping tears from your eyes, you rose from your chair and dashed to your room, calling him over.

When you opened a box from under your bed, there were wonderful memories from you and your grandparents inside. You attempted to obtain more, but everything was returned to the Underworld, leaving you with only this.

Jay knelt down and picked up a photograph of you and them. They were regulars, and he had seen them around town. Hopefully, in the short time she had left, you could help her.

“Elizabeth and Albert Marvin were their names. I'm not sure if there's anything else I can do to assist you, but please do your best." As you hurriedly covered your mouth with your palm, a harsh cough came from your throat, and your chest began to throb as you placed your hand on your heart.

It was obvious that time was not on your side. You rise off the ground and walk over to Jay, looking up at him. You wrapped your arms around his frigid body, engulfing him in a hug.

Jay stood there awkwardly with his arms down as he gently moved you off and returned to the couch area.

“Like I said, there's no guarantee that I'll find them, and who knows, they could not even be alive. But I’ll try my best. It was a pleasure to speak with you, but I must depart because we are running out of time.”

He gave you a beeper before vanishing.

“Please page me on here if you need to reach me; I'll do my best to respond. You look after yourself.”

You waved farewell as he left your house and returned to his, where he continued his exhaustive investigation.

He didn't want to let you down because he felt such a responsibility to you. He would complete whatever task he was given. He would do anything for you if he could see that smile on your face.

“Let's get down to business.”

---

“Jay...Jay wake up” As you awoke slowly from your arms, you felt a push on your shoulder. As your eyes adjusted to the bright light, it took some time to figure out who was interrupting you.

“W-What exactly is it, Jake?” You and Jake have been coming in every day for the past five days, attempting to find a solution to your problem. Jake may have discovered something despite the difficulties.

“So, I just had an epiphany, last time I saw Y/N she was at Melvin bookstore, so let's see if he knows anything about them.” You leapt from your chair and snatched a jacket as you ushered Jake out the door and toward Melvin.

For you and y/n, things were starting to look up.

Maybe you were going to do something good for one of your friends souls.

As you and Jake approached Melvin's business, you inhaled deeply and opened the door, eager to hear what he had to say to you.

Melvin's attention was drawn to the bell sound, and he looked up from his spectacles, saying, "Hey youngsters, what brings you here?"

“Well, we had a question for you regarding an old friend of yours, does Elizabeth Marvin ring a bell?” He pulled a photograph from his back pocket and presented it to him; his face darkened as he held the photograph in his hands and smiled broadly at it.

“Oh, my favorite customers. I don't have much information, but the last time they were in here, they were in a hurry and seemed concerned. “We have to make the crossing,” Elizabeth kept emphasizing.

As you and Jake turned to each other, you both had a frightened expression on your faces.

“Don't tell me they took the Crossing, shit,” says Jay You turned around and proceeded towards the door, thanking Melvin, while Jake grinned and waved farewell before heading out the door. He discovered you slumped against the wall, head down, groaning.

“Jay, please don't thin-”

“Keep your mouth shut Jake, because you know no one survives the Crossing without a guide. There are just too many wicked spirits out there, and you and I both know that getting to the finish is impossible. Jay growled as he stood up and kicked whatever was closest to him.

“Ugh, why did I do that?”

Jake approached his friend and patted his back, unsure of how he would react. It was a small gesture. He knew it was impossible, but he didn't want his best friend to know. They still needed to be encouraged.

“I'm going back to headquarters to see what else we can find; meet me back there, okay?” As he watched Jake go from his sight, Jay nodded and thanked him for his assistance.

He didn't know what else to do, so he had to break the dreadful news to you. It turned out to be for the best. He was good at one thing: conveying bad information to others. What an ironic Reaper. With a shake of your head, you prepared to go to Y/N's flat.

Here goes nothing.

Jay was gone in a flash of dust and now stood in a familiar location, squinting as everything appeared to be different. Jay spotted clothes strewn on the floor, dishes scattered in the sink, and the bathroom's random lights flashing.

He was so preoccupied with the status of the house that he didn't see that your time was slowly eating away at you, that you were holed up under blankets in the bedroom with chest discomfort and dizziness that came and went.

Your once-young body was losing its ability to hold on to life. As you coughed loudly and grinned as you motioned for him to come over to you, you looked up and noticed him standing in the doorway.

You quietly sighed as you slowly climbed up, your hand resting on your chest.

‘So-so any news captain. “I need something to take my mind off the pain.”

As he prepared his message, Jay didn't make eye contact with you as he lifted your blanket over your body and patted it down. This felt different than relaying bad news as the “BIG AND BAD GRIM REAPER” As he was going to burst your bubble, something inside ached. What do people refer to it as? Sadness.

What exactly did you do to him?

“So, Y/N, please wait until I finish before you speak.” He took a big breath and continued, his lips curling in. “We've at a dead end; Jake and I spoke with Melvin, who indicated they were discussing the "Crossing," which in Grim Reaper lingo means "no go." That's a place where no one ever returns; it's only conceivable if you have a guide, which I'm not sure they did. They could be lost or worse, stolen by a spirit, for all I know. I-, I'm sorry, but I'm not sure.”

He heard your voice and looked down, avoiding eye contact. "It's okay Jay," He jerked up and glanced at your frail form, perplexed and terrified. In the light of your candle, he could see better, but death was creeping up on him. He just had a day before he had to take you. He wasn't pleased with the situation or with you.

“It was a big ask, but I'm happy you and Jake did your hardest,” you said, a tear streaming down your cheek. That's all I requested, and despite the fact that it didn't work out, I liked the gesture, so thank you.”

“Thanks for doing business with you,” you said with a grin on your face as you extended your hand to him. As you looked him in the eyes, he took your weak hands in his and gently shook them.

“What, do I have something on my face? I don't want to appear unkempt.” You laughed and reached for your hands to be unlatched from his grip. Rather than releasing go, he drew you closer to him and kissed your gentle lips.

As you released each other, he wasn't thinking; in reality, he was panicked.

“Um- I don’t know what that is but I have to go. Sorry, I'll pick you up tomorrow-” “Please don't go,” you said as you took a big breath and clutched his hand. If I'm being honest, I'm afraid, and I could use some companionship before I take my final breath.”

“Sleep well y/n, we have a long walk tomorrow,” he said as he sat down on the bed and took your hand in his again before turning off the lamp. When you felt a squeeze in your palm, you smiled and laid over, allowing sleep to take control.

---

You were startled awake by Jay, who sat across from you, peering at the clock, as though intently staring at it.

You scooted up and waved a hand in front of his face to grab his attention, but he continued to stare at the clock.

“You have a few hours left, you know? Sorry, I was just doing some math." He turned to face you as you stumbled out of bed, grasping the bedside table before lifting yourself up like a drunk woman.

“Oh, well, it appears that my body is shutting down. Fun.” As you pushed him out of the room, you gave him a thumbs up.

“Let me get dressed; I want to look my best for when I DIE!” Jay was startled and furrowed his brows as he walked slowly to his seat, pondering why this generation was so eager to die.

You put on a cute hoodie your grandmother gave you and threw on some pants. As you fumbled about for shoes, you heard Jay ask a question from the other side of the door that made you pause.

'Are you going to call your parents or someone else?'

When you think back on your life, you were in theirs, but not much of them were in yours, which made you resentful of them. You didn't dislike them; you just preferred to spend your time and energy with people who made you feel at ease.

Your grandparents made you feel that way and you didn't have time to waste on people who you could care less about.

“I guess I'll send a text over.” Huffing, you took out your phone and entered your message into an already-created group chat.

"Hey guys, I'm not feeling well, could you come tomorrow?" you say.

(read 10:25 a.m.)

(typing bubbles)

(bubbles disappears)

Mom: This is such a last-minute thing, but your father and I are leaving tomorrow for a business trip that will last a week. Maybe when we come back. I'll send Sylvia over because I gave her the day off. “Be careful.”

Throwing your phone you yelled aggressively as you looked around your space. Even while you're dying, they don't give a damn about you. What is fucking family anymore? You took one final look at your bed before stepping out and calling Jay, as if you didn't care any longer.

“Hey you good, I heard screaming but didn't want to interrupt if you were nude or something,” he said, looking up at your hesitant face. As you passed him on your way to the door, a smile crept across your lips.

“Oh shut up, come on, I got a request.”

Jay got up and walked past you as you turned to see your whole life stored away in a small space. Even if you didn't know where Jay would lead you, you had a feeling it would be better, right?

“Goodbye” As you walked slowly to your car in the parking lot, you grabbed Jay's hand in yours as you closed the door. As you held his hand even more, you felt it tense up.

“Hey what was that for?”

“You whine a lot, don't you? Come on, I've got a few more dying wishes before you take me and send me off somewhere, let's fucking go.”

He saw you let go of your hand as you walked to the opposite side of your car, hopped in, and turned on the ignition.

“Are you sure you're up for this? I don't want you passing out on me.”

Jay rushed next to you as he reached for your shoulder as a cough steadily burst from your throat, causing you to grasp your chest in anguish. You shook your head and gave your body a couple shakes as you waved your hand at him.

“I'm good, you know the exact time, so give me a heads up whenever I'm close.” “Anyway, less about my condition and more on the fun we're about to have.”

You put your foot on the brake and drove out the parking lot and on your way to the boardwalk that was a good distance away.

“Sit back, it'll be around 2 hours before we get to my favorite spot.”

Jay offered you a troubled expression as he laid his head on the window, pondering the time you had left while gazing out the window.

*8 hours left, you had eight hours left*

---

Coming up over the infamous hill, you notice the blue seas and immediately begin to brighten up as you repeatedly punch Jay in the arm.

“Jay... Jay... JAYYYY loook were here,” He grabbed your hand and swung it the other way before slowly turning to face you before your final punch. Don't bother Reapers while they're asleep; they don't get enough sleep as it is, and constantly bringing souls is exhausting.

“Please stopp I heard you the first five fucking times.” As he turned back to face the water, he rolled his eys and chuckled a little. The way the waves drenched the salty surface back and forth was more than simply water; it was an artwork.

Even though this might be your last moments on earth, you were glad you found someone to spend them with as you saw Jay's look. You put your hand on his shoulder and signaled for you to depart.

He stepped out of the car, mesmerized by the quiet waters, and walked over to your side, his gaze never leaving the sea.

“It's strange, I've seen my days of oceans before, and I've probably gone to all of them many times, but this one feels different. For a little moment, I forgot I wasn't human. Oh that remind me”

Jay rotated in a circle as he appeared to you dressed in more fashionable attire to placate the human crowd. He clutched your arm as he lost his footing for a second, then raced forward towards the boardwalk, thanking you.

“Hurry up, I didn't transform into a normal male for nothing, I want to see what you folk do up here.” He sneaked a glimpse at you as you laughed heartily at him, and before he knew it, you were running past him, his hand in yours, and on your way to the boardwalk's many attractions.

Spilled ice cream cups, lost money from arcade games, the sides of yours and his faces scorching from a lack of sunscreen, and not to mention the continual brushing of each other's hands were all part of the day. You took Jay's hand as the crowds filtered off the boardwalk and brought him to one of your favorite areas, the sand. As you approach the ocean now that the sun has lowered somewhat, it feels chilly.

As you stand in the cool ocean, letting the waves wash over your feet and taking a deep breath, attempting to relax, you feel a touch on your back. When you open your eyes, you notice Jay standing next to you, his gaze fixed on you. You laughed and placed your head on his shoulder; he didn't flinch or react this time.

He'd become accustomed to it and even loved it.

“How much time do we have left? Will I miss the sunset? Please say no.” You drooped your lips and glanced towards him, anxiously awaiting his response.

“Don't worry, you'll have time,” he said, taking your hand in his and pulling you down further away from the water as you both watched at the ball of light travelling toward the horizon.

The dazzling and flaming sun began to be swallowed by the sky as nightfall approached. The sky suddenly fills with beautiful, rich colors ranging from soothing blues to powerful reds and bright oranges, and finally thin, melancholy clouds.

Jay drew you closer, which surprised you, but you didn't mind because it was getting colder and fewer people were leaving the beach, leaving fragments of people strewn about. Jay drew your attention to himself before relaying the news to you.

Allow me to speak before I say what I truly need to say; these past three weeks have been incredible and eye-opening. I had no idea there were individuals out there that battled and were as brave as you. I understand how difficult it must be to go through all of these changes, but-”

A tear trickled down your face as you coughed, interrupting his speech.

*10 minutes left*

“Oh don’t start crying,” “All I wanted to say is thank you for allowing me to experience something different than my typical routine,” you joked as you pushed his chest. I don't get out very often, but tonight was enjoyable; I hope it distracted you from your worries.”

As you clasped your chest and pulled Jay out of worry, a fast cough attack hit your system.

*5 minutes left*

“I-i woul-l-d love to talk more about our fond memories but my chest is hurting and I think you need to get to the point.” You unbunched his shirt from your fist and let him continue, smiling despite your pain.

He embraced you in his arms because he was afraid he wouldn't have enough time to relay everything.

“Fuck it”

He drew you in and kissed you again, this time more passionately than before. Your heart skipped a beat as heat rose from your stomach to your chest, and you weren't sure if it was a legitimate emotion or your condition was approaching. As you drew him closer to you, flinging your arms around his neck and smiling, the fragrance of salty sea water filled your nostrils. This moment, the taste of him… It calmed your racing thoughts and made you feel as if your heart was slowing down.

*1 minute left*

As you backed away from his kiss, your eyesight faded in and out, and as you looked about, your vision in the inner corners of your eyes started to go black. It was occurring, and your time was running out. You staggered into Jay's arms as he spoke into your ear, looking back at him.

“See you on the other side Y/N”

---

When you first awoke, you peered around at the dark waters, then looked up to see the real Jay. His Scythe's blade gleamed in the moonlight, and his velvet hood blew in the breeze. Not turning around you heard his voice, distinctly differently than before.

“Get ready, we're closing in on our dock.”

You slowly stood up and felt a prickling sensation on your wrist as you noticed your bracelet was lightly shining, something it had never done before. Perhaps it was the moonlight reflecting off of it.

You observed three figures standing at the dock through the mist and tried to figure out who they were. You didn't realize it until you got off the boat.

“Gramps and Gram, what?” Your voice trembled as tears streamed down your cheeks. You couldn’t believe what you were seeing.

“Is this a joke,” As you grabbed them in a deep hug, a hand pushed you closer to them.

“We missed you pumpkin.” You turned around and went towards the dark figure, making sure not to hit his Scythe as you drew Jay into a hug as you got snot on his coat.

“I thought you said you couldn't find them,” you remarked. “I had given up hope.” His face was obscured by a black gloom, so you couldn't see him.

“Um, sorry but could you change back to your normal self, just this once.” Jay reappeared in his usual body, simply regular old Jay, in a split second.

“I apologize for forgetting about that, but please don't thank me. It was all my pal Jake over there.” You turned around and raced over to Jake, hugging him and almost shoving him off the dock.

“Thank you thank you so much, I owe you one.” “Don't worry about it,” he said as he stepped back.

After letting go of him, you returned to the location where your grandparents were standing and took their hands in yours. It was time for you to leave, and all you had to do was walk away.

As tears streamed down your cheeks, you came to a halt and turned around to face him. It didn't take long for you to run back into his arms.

“I'm not usually this way, but I'm glad I found someone I can call a friend.” Jay, I hope we run across each other. Thank you for everything; I just wanted to let you know that your efforts are appreciated.”

You let him go and wave to him after pulling him into a goodbye kiss. You hear him calling out to you.

“I think I like you Y/N?”

“Well, I think we should talk about that the next time I see you.” You turn back and continue on your journey, giggling at his childish antics as you fade into the darkness.

As he and Jake hopped back into the boat to return home, Jay's smile never faded.

“I told you so”

“Oh shut it.”

He'd finally found that thing you'd always talked about, that haven where you felt so comfortable that the rest of the world couldn't possibly come crashing down around you. He was overjoyed to have discovered his HOME and vowed to do everything in his power to ensure he never lost it.

“See you soon Y/N.”

☆ ҉ ◢▅◣

➳ Navigate to the Maze

#enhypen #enhypen writers #enhypen series #enhypen jay #enhypen jay park #jay park #jay #jay enhypen #enhypen reactions #en-#kpop au #enhypen au #enhypen x reader #enhypen x y/n #enhypen masterlist #babytaes works

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fleursdemeduse · 3 years

Text

Remembrance AU: Constant Dying

This is not going in the direction that was originally planned, but I'm not sure I'm too upset by it. I'm glad to finally post a part that goes a bit further into Techno's feelings about you this time, though. I'm also starting to work on an angsty Simpbur fic alongside this one, so keep an eye out for that.

Warnings: Mention of death ; Near-death

Words: 3.6k

Your legs throbbed as you trudged through the multiple paths to where you and Techno had been mining. Your neck wasn’t fairing much better. There was always residual pain after a death, especially when you were killed by your own stupidity and not mobs or someone else. You were more than happy to take hits for your friend, often shielding his body with your much smaller one to protect him, but natural deaths were pointless to you. Not to mention that dying this many times in such a short period made an ache develop on the right side of your brain and you knew you wouldn’t be able to be rid of it for hours. You finished descending carved stairs to where you believed you had been and let out a sigh at the effort. Your chest filled with a dull ache at the action. A firework to the chest was certainly a quick way to die. It was far from the most painful as long as it got the job done in one or two shots and the ache would only last another hour or two if you would stop dying.

You thought back on how the events from earlier in the day had transpired. The entire thing had been a shit show and you loathed the next time you’d speak to Wilbur, knowing you were likely going to just yell at him. You weren’t in a great mood because of his little stunt. At least you knew why Techno had killed you and several others on the server. There was no reason for him to sit back and watch Tubbo be executed by your dearest friend. You could only hope that the boys new scars weren’t too bad. He’d have to display them for the rest of this lifetime, after all. Maybe he’d think they were cool like Tommy did.

You slowly unclenched your jaw and relaxed your shoulders, smiling a little at the thought of blond that you spent the other half of your days doting on. He was like the little brother you had always imagined wanting. Mumza had filled your prayers in some fashion, you supposed. A small chuckle spilled from your lips, deciding you’d make Technoblade pay you back somehow for your deaths today. You were up to three now.

A smile curled your lips as you thought of the possibilities. Maybe you’d steal his crown for a little bit. Or his cloak. You giggled to yourself as you crossed the lava pit that you were going to use later for obsidian. Mining in caves this deep was difficult enough without mobs so the lava was a good way to make sure none spawned nearby. Perhaps you could get away with all of the above with the addition of forcing him to make you a cup of tea. That would certainly be fair, wouldn’t it? You were sure if you convinced chat, you’d be able to make him do it.

The ore had been mostly cleared out, all that remained were long tunnels deep underground spanning for what felt like forever. It took you a good chunk of time, but finally you approached him from behind. He had continued mining, cobblestone covering the hole that you had fallen down and ultimately died upon impact in. “You grabbed my stuff, right?”

He pointed to the chest that had been set up, not stopping his assault on a piece of diorite. You flipped open the lid, pulling out several stone pickaxes he had managed to pick up. You didn’t suppose he had kept most of the stone, leaving it in the cave, but the ores, redstone, and lapis you had gathered sat untouched in the chest. “I don’t understand why you continue to use those. They’re flimsy.”

You shrugged before joining his side again, mining away the soft rock. “Because I can keep a large stock of them and don’t have to waste the durability of my diamond one.” You stopped paying attention to the coal you mined at above you as you looked towards him. “Besides, they’re expendable and I don’t have to worry about retrieving them every time I-”

Gravel began to fall on and around you in heavy chunks, obscuring your vision. You were startled for a moment at the sudden assault and you cursed your horrible luck. Of course the moment you were back and trying to resume your task, you’d almost die again. You recovered quickly, feeling the pressure around you as you were crushed and tried to dig your way out of the pile, but more seemed to just fall and replace the gravel you had just removed. It was suffocating. Rocks grated against your skin and you cringed at the sound of them rubbing against each other. You tried to claw your way through, fingers getting scraped as small pebbles cut the flesh. You were running out of air. You hated dying like this.

A hand grasped your bicep and you grunted as you were yanked out of the rubble. Rocks and flint shifted around you as it gave way and filled in the spot where you had just been. A broad chest cushioned you as you stumbled forward. You sucked in air as you rested your forehead against him. "I don't think I've ever seen anyone screw something up that fast before."

Your laugh was more of a wheeze as you smacked your hand against him, next to where your head rested. You didn’t move, however. Techno chuckled as he pat your back. He’d let you have your moment to calm yourself back down. He wasn’t particularly scared of you dying again, but he knew it had to have sucked. You had been taking the brunt of damage meant for him since, well, every time the two of you spent time together, and he didn’t understand why you were so eager to do it. On top of your clumsiness that already resulted in countless other deaths he didn’t know about, you died for him often when it would have probably only resulted in a minor wound for him. You were so reckless. But that smile you gave him every time somehow dissipated his annoyance more than it should have. It was familiar somehow. The voices loved it more than they should have. They loved you more than they should have.

You didn’t care who he was, how he was, what he did, if he could do something for you. You cared about him. Whenever he was giving too much to the rebellion, whenever he was hyper fixated on tasks and was trapped in his own brain with only chat as company, you were always there. They didn’t mind receding to the back of his head while you two talked, adding in small quips here and there. The loud roar they normally were was typically a small rumble when you were talking. It put him on edge with how much they liked you, but he couldn’t blame them. You provided conversation more often than not. You offered simpler solutions to long problems in his head he’d been breaking apart over and over until it had spiraled into a bigger one than it had started out at. But besides that, you also forced him to sleep, to remember to drink water, to take time for himself. To care about himself the way you did. He didn’t know how to repay you for the unending kindness you showed him. Especially when all you asked for was his friendship in return.

He felt you sigh against him and he moved his arm to free you. You were looking up at him, though, not stepping away.

"Are you alright?" His lips twitched. Shouldn’t he be asking you that?

"Yeah, why?"

"You look mad." A snort escaped him. You couldn’t even see his expression past the mask.

"That's just my face.” You didn’t look convinced. He ran his fingers through your hair, knocking some debris loose. It fell to the floor at your feet. He ignored the way you leaned into his touch. “I’m alright, [y/n].”

You smiled at him. You smiled that cursed smile. It made him feel worthy of the title god; so full of reverence and kindness. You had to have been blessed by Kristin herself. How could you still look upon him like that after what had happened at the festival? How could you show such adoration for a-

“Stop lookin’ at me like that.” He turned his head away. He didn’t feel like he deserved to be the recipient of that smile made from sheer adoration. Your eyebrows furrowed and your smile wavered.

“Looking at you like what?”

“Like how Wilbur looks at you.” Your laugh rang through the tunnels. It echoed off the walls and he couldn’t help the swell of something in his chest. For a moment, you reminded him of Phil.

“Why is it a bad thing if I look at you like he does to me? He’s a really dear friend.” Oh dear.

“Don’t tell him that.” The idea of you only seeing him as a friend would break his heart floated unspoken in the air. You didn’t seem to notice it.

“Why not?”

“Just don’t.” Techno stepped back from you when it was obvious you weren’t going to do it yourself. He watched you deflate slightly and felt like he had done something wrong.

“It’s not like he wants to talk to me now anyways.” You picked up your pickaxe again, moving to work on the pile of gravel. He offered you his shovel and you took it. “He hasn’t said a word to me since the festival earlier.”

“I’m honestly surprised you’re still talkin’ to either of us after that debacle.” You paused your digging to look at him curiously. “After me bein’ peer pressured into killin’ Tubbo and everyone else. Killin’ you. His plan to do nothin’ ‘bout it. It’s surprisin’ that you aren’t givin’ us both the silent treatment.”

You scoffed, going back to the gravel in front of you. “That wasn’t his plan.”

Techno stilled, his eyebrows furrowing. “What?”

“Wilbur wasn’t planning on just doing nothing. He has TNT planted all around Manburg.” You hesitated, the grip on his shovel tightening in your trembling hands as you continued digging. “I don’t know why he didn’t set it off.”

There was no sound next to you or behind you. Stopping your work, you looked at him, only to see him looking towards where the mouth of the cave was. “We should be gettin’ back.”

A soft sigh left your mouth. “Go on ahead, I’m right behind you.”

You didn’t want to face the fallout.

You returned to Pogtopia late that night. Mining alone had been a good way to soothe your nerves after the events that had happened earlier. Whilst you had wished Techno had been there longer, you understood wanting to regroup. Today had been stressful for all of you.

You walked down the crude steps that had been made after putting the excess resources into the communal chest at the top. There was soft murmuring and the distant sound of Wilbur’s cackle put you a little on edge, but you soldiered on. It’s okay. Tubbo hopefully would have respawned by now. Things would go on. You froze at the top of the walkway down to the primary meeting area.

Techno was wrapping his knuckles with some extra gauze you recognized to be from your chest. Tommy was sitting a little away from him, his back to the wall and his knees to his chest. There was a distant look in his eyes as he stared at the ground in front of him. You could see a sliver of one of your plasters on his face, the bluish purple fabric and white dots a dark galaxy against his pale cheek. Your feet were moving before your brain as you ran to the teenage boy and knelt before him. You should have come back sooner. You reached out to hold him before hesitating, choosing instead to extend your hand to examine the flesh around the bandage. “You look horrible, Tommy. What happened? I thought you were safe after what happened at the festival.”

Techno grunted from the sidelines. “We resolved our issues.”

The boy before you huffed, still looking at the ground, but he leaned into your touch. “Resolved is a strong word, but we’re okay. For now.” He looked up at you and you pursed your lips together. He relaxed at the worry in your eyes. He was safe with you. “Where were you?”

“I was mining. I needed to blow off steam after all of that.” The blond just nodded, pressing his face further into your touch. You moved closer to brush some of the golden locks away from his face with your free hand. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

Techno was suddenly beside you both, towering over the two of you. “It stays in the pit.”

You sent him an inquisitive look. “The pit?”

He only nodded and your frown deepened. Anger started to fester in you. Did he do this? To a child? “We are definitely discussing this later, Technoblade.” You watched his shoulders tense for a moment. You didn’t know if it was because of your tone or the use of his full name, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care at the moment. You’d take care of it later. You two always talked things through, and now would not be any different, but you had to worry about Tommy. “You can’t just hurt people and say things are better now.”

He opened his mouth to retort, but you were already helping the blond up to shuffle him to your bed. The child kept trying to wave you off, but you persisted. Despite your ire against him, something shifted in his chest at watching how gentle you were with Tommy. His bond with you was truly something to behold.

Why aren’t they paying attention to us like earlier?

They’re so sweet to him.

Tommy's lucky we didn’t accidentally kill him.

I wonder how they’re so close.

I don’t want to talk to them later.

Why are they mad at us?

So they’re not upset about the festival, but they’re upset about a fight with Tommy? That makes no sense.

Follow them.

This is stupid.

Do they like him more?

Techno sat back in his spot against the ravine wall. He saw traces of a fireplace and used the heel of his boot to push around the sooty remains. Most of the questions chat had were valid, but he didn’t want to pursue you. He didn’t want to have that conversation later, either. He just wanted to move on. But he knew you wouldn’t. Something about how resentment ruins friendships and miscommunication was the biggest cause. He could never resent you. Sometimes he resented the gods, but never you.

He wanted to know what kind of entertainment DreamXD and Kristin got out of watching them over and over and over again. Did they have nothing better to do than continuously create and orchestrate each new lifetime? Each new world with different rules and a different storyline? Or recreate other worlds just to change the plot? There had been so many, but this was the first where they all remembered. This was the first where he had met you.

Techno closed his eyes. None of his lives had been bad. Well, particularly bad. Wilbur always seemed to get off worse than he did. Tommy sometimes worse than them both.

He remembered a life of gilded castles, one of many. He trained Wilbur and Tommy in combat. He studied politics and was a general. He watched the two of them grow up in Phil’s absence. There were handmaidens that were too bold in their words, butlers that were too polite, and inside jokes between him and the guards. There were dinners made of things that he only wished they could recreate here. He remembered that despite any squabbling, they were still very much a family. He knows Tommy remembers that one all too clearly. He doesn’t talk about it often, but Techno knows the look in his eyes whenever Phil is mentioned. He also speaks sometimes about the servant that once tended to his mother but he nor Wilbur could ever recall one. Too many faceless employees. Too many nameless soldiers.

He remembered a different life where Hanahaki Disease roamed rampant. The flowers infected most of the people he knew. Sometimes they got better, sometimes they didn’t. Phil would never catch it. The blurry memory of his friend saying so flashed briefly in his head. That fact didn't surprise him in the least. Phil was a catch. But he had never had to deal with the deadly buds either. He couldn't remember why. His head throbbed gently as he tried to wade through the fog. Wilbur had suffered from it, though. It was devastating when he passed. The flowers choked him, stuffing his airways with petals. Who had he loved so much it killed him? Didn't he love anyone like that? Didn’t he find someone so beautiful that dying was more preferable than a life without them? Maybe he did. There were small flashes in his head of the gentle squeeze of a hand and a smile that could snuff out the sun. Why couldn't he seem to remember their face?

There was another life. A life where markings appeared on his skin. Little scratches, cuts and scrapes that weren't his, doodles, words that he would have never written himself. He remembered sitting through a lecture once, smiling at the little stars that speckled his arm and slowly appeared like the night sky in the twilight of the setting sun. Wilbur had shown off the same markings, and it was brutal irony that the two of them shared this connection with a third. They would play games frequently. Mostly twenty questions or tic tac toe, but locations and true names were always burning scribbles on their flesh when attempted. They tried many tactics to find out more before Wilbur had told them both off. He wonders if they had found their third in that life.

There had always been gaps in his memory, especially when it came to his other lives. Lulls where the mundane had become just a bit too mundane, moments where he just shut his brain off and went by instinct. Things were easier when you didn’t have past lives to think about. When he didn’t have to consider if he had already learnt a lesson and was doomed to repeat it. When you weren’t around to give him glares and words of encouragement and cause disruption in his life. Were Tommy and Wilbur’s lives more difficult with you here too? With someone to tell them what to do and to patch up their wounds and give fleeting touches that were so soft it was like touching a petal? He hopes not.

A sound of distress comes from the direction you and Tommy had gone in and he turns to look. You’re standing there, facing away from him, reaching out towards empty space to someone who wasn’t there. You must’ve been the one to make the noise.

You turn around and his frown deepens. You look tired and more than a little frustrated. It was amazing how much of a difference you stood now compared to the person that clung to him throughout the nether when he had first met you. Your presence was easy. You didn’t ramble like he would disappear anymore. You didn’t look to him for validation with every move. You didn’t act out of the desperation isolation had instilled in you. You had settled like the missing puzzle piece they didn’t even know was missing. Did you ever visit the library that you had once called your first home?

He watches you finally approach him, sitting and leaning against his side as if you weren’t upset. You move to intertwine your arm with his, hand slipping into his own. He didn’t stop you. “Wilbur, he’s-”

“Crazy? Yeah, I know. He wants me to set off withers.” You sat straight up. Shock painted your face a hue that didn’t suit you. Or perhaps it was fear. He didn’t like it.

“Withers?” He nods. Your head spins back to the direction of your bedroom. “Does Tommy know?”

“Tommy knows. I went along with it.” Techno feels you scoot away, releasing your hold on him and he already misses the feeling. “It’s not like we’re tryin’ to salvage the place, [y/n].”

“I don’t want more innocent people to lose another life, Tech.” You look at him once more. “Do Tommy and Wilbur know that you’re hoping to leave nothing behind? Because they both talk about reestablishing L’manburg when given the chance.”

“I keep tellin’ them the truth, but it seems like they’re not gonna listen.” He watches your face fall into a look that he hopes meant acceptance. Your eyes moved to the ground between you both and you just nodded. You didn’t know where you would sit in the aftermath of this all.

Techno felt your hand slip back into his as you take your place back against his side. Pink hair was soft against your cheek as you rested it against his shoulder.

“One step at a time. Let’s worry about getting rid of Schlatt first, okay?” He just nods back, resting his head on top of yours. You squeeze his hand in response. You felt safe again, especially with him next to you “Now-

Tell me about this pit.”

#RemembranceAU #dsmp au #dream smp au #dsmp x reader #dream smp x reader #technoblade x reader #wilbur x reader #wilbur soot x reader #mcyt x reader #tw: death

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schattenjagd · 4 years

Text

Lost without you (2/2)

A/N : And here it is. I really have nothing much to say about this part but I hope you’ll enjoy it :-) Ah, and this part got inspired by Freya Riding’s Piano Session of “Lost without you”. This is also the video that inspired this whole fanfic and from which I got the idea.

Word Count : 3.9K

Warnings : None, maybe some angst ?

Pairing : Elijah Mikaelson x Reader

youtube

Five years later, Elijah tapped impatiently on the dashboard of the dark SUV. How long had he been driving across the country with Niklaus ? Ten hours, maybe more ? He hadn't expected that when his brother had dragged him out of Hayley's house and into the car in the early morning. Elijah had no idea where his brother was going to kidnap him to, nor did he know if he wanted to know.

He closed his eyes. He was tired. After a four-year coma sleep, one would think that he had slept enough, but even his exhausted original vampire body seemed to disagree.

"I am lost without you."

He briefly closed his eyes at the sound of her voice haunting his thoughts. In Freya's Chambre de Chase, everything had been easier. His thoughts had been simpler. Sometimes he had been able to suppress the memories of her, he and his siblings had been isolated from everything, but now, here in the world of the living, every little detail seemed to remind him of her. It was exactly the same like two days ago.

***

The plan had been simple.

Hayley and Freya would sneaked into the vault below the estate to free Niklaus. Elijah's only job was to distract Marcellus as long as possible and to give women time; Time his sister would need to break certain spells.

Elijah had spent enough years of his long life in this house, he knew its entrances and exits better than the back of his hand. But something prevented him from disappearing into the little alley next to the estate, from where he would get to the side door.

At first, he didn't notice her. She had turned her back on him. The knee-length, red dress blew lightly in the warm summer wind and played around her delicate legs. She had put back the Y/H/C hair he'd loved to let his fingers run through into a simple bun.

Elijah inhaled sharply and just looked at her. He swallowed hard and was barely able to look away as he watched her continue walking down the street. A brief flash shot through his head, a flash that carried her last memory together; her farewell on the platform.

She stopped and Elijah was still tied up. If his vampire body were not smarter than him at that moment, he would have suffocated, if breathing would not be an unconscious activity.

And then she turned to face him as she crossed the street, looking for cars to come.

It wasn’t her.

Elijah blinked several times and tried to suppress this painful feeling in his chest, as if a fist has closed around his heart and slowly but surely crushed it.

It wasn't her and she never would be it again.

She wouldn’t come back. She didn't know he existed.

He pressed his lips together in a thin line. He had made her forget, sent her away and compelled to forget him. And so it was better, better for her. In any case, that was what he told himself, year after year. Year after year when her birthday was celebrated, or their anniversary together. It was terrible. And yet Elijah couldn't bring herself to forget her. How could he ?

In the meantime, Y/N's doppelgänger had disappeared and Elijah swallowed hard again. No, he had a slightly higher priority than his own grief now - his family. He had to be there for them now, as he always was. His grief had no place.

Determined, he pushed the side door open and disappeared into the property.

***

7 years ago

“It’s on the house."

Elijah had just taken a seat at the bar, and was now watching Niklaus from a safe distance how he was talking to his very own therapist, who seemed anything but pleased with his appearance. He looked up in surprise at the friendly voice and the glass of bourbon that had been put in front of his nose.

He briefly held his breath without realizing it. He knew her. He knew her, of course, but he was surprised that he actually remembered the young, pretty woman from Jackson Square. Now she looked different, wearing a short black apron over dark blue jeans and a simple black top. The Y/H/C hair had been tied back to a simple ponytail. Her Y/E/C eyes literally sparkled a little when she kindly looked at hin.

"I think I know you," she thoughtfully said, gesturing absently at him with the bourbon bottle she was still holding. It was almost as if she had read his mind. "You were the one who gave me the $50 bill."

The corners of Elijah's mouth went up a little, there was nothing he could do about it. He shrugged and gratefully sipped his drink. "What makes you so sure ?"

She just shrugged. “Well, mysterious guy shows up, looks at me. Mysterious guy disappears, $50 appear in my mason jar”. she gestured again with the bottle head in his direction and cocked her head a little. "I still don't know how you did it, but I'll find out."

Now Elijah actually had to grin a little as she put the bourbon bottle back on the shelf. She came back to him and braced herself on the bar with her forearms.

"It could just as well have been someone else," Elijah added after another sip, whereupon she only raised her eyebrows.

“Nobody was near me. “

"Neither was I."

She narrowed her eyes a little, thoughtfully. "Are ya a wizard or something?"

Elijah had for the first time in his life a hard time not to laugh. Oh, if he were a sorcerer, Niklaus would probably have murdered him several times. Still, there was nothing he could do about it when the corners of his mouth went up again."No," he replied with a smile. "I'm not a wizard."

"Why did you do that ?"

Now, he questioningly raised his eyebrows a little and looked up at her. But she had pursed her lips and looked at him, waiting.

"Why did I do what ?"

“The $ 50. Do you know how long I have to stand here to earn this ? I mean, it's probably not a lot of money for you.” Her eyes fell briefly on his expensive suit. “But still. I'm curious."

He shrugged again that evening, something unusual for him. “You have a beautiful voice. I'm certainly not the first to fall for it. ”

When he looked back at her, she had bitten her lower lip and appraisingly. looked at him She was probably judging whether his answer was realistic or complete nonsense.

"I don't know if I should be flattered or embarrassed, Mister …"

"Elijah," he interrupted quickly. "Elijah Mikaelson."

She smiled. It was the same smile as at Jackson Square and he had to swallow again. But then she held out her hand to him.

“Well, Elijah Mikaelson. I am Y/N. Y/N Y/L/N. Nice to meet you."

He took her hand and a warm feeling flowed through him.,,The pleasure is mine."

***

Elijah was taken out of his thoughts when Niklaus suddenly stopped the car. He looked up and around, but only large wrinkles appeared on his forehead.

"What the hell are we doing in Chigaco, Niklaus ?" His voice was calm, yet Elijah was upset.

Niklaus had stopped the car on the roadside, but Elijah could still see the distinctive skyline with the Willis Tower from a distance. He rubbed his face and sighed. They had more important things to do than a road trip across America. Especially if they had missed four years in this world.

“Apparently Freya’s dream world has hit you a lot, brother. Such words from the mouth of the noble Elijah Mikaelson ”, Klaus only amused himself and his brother gave him a scowl as the blonde got out of the car and looked briefly around.

Elijah did the same. They were in the middle of downtown and it was almost a miracle that Niklaus had found a parking space by the roadside.

The streets were busy and crowded, and there was an oppressive heat in the big city that they weren't even used to in New Orleans.

But Elijah barely had time to get an overview of the situation, when his brother was already booted and headed purposefully towards a subway station.

"What is it that you're up to, Niklaus ?" He finally asked when he had caught up with his brother. He frowned as they descended the steps to the subway station.

"You'll find out soon enough."

Elijah bit his lower lip acidified and instead looked around the narrow corridor with too many people. It was late afternoon and most of them were coming from their work. No wonder that you could hardly walk in the subway station.

Elijah irritably pushed through the crowd behind his brother and was relieved when the crowds finally decreased. The big subway station was a maze and he involuntarily wondered how to find your way down here as a stranger.

He stopped abruptly.

Piano music.

Behind him, a woman quietly cursed when she almost ran into him and now avoided the original vampire, but not without glowing at him. Most of the other people did the same and now avoided Elijah.

Klaus, who had heard the same thing and noticed how his brother had suddenly frozen, stopped and sirked. Yes, exactly as he’d expected.

Slowly, he turned and watched his brother listen intently. He could literally see Elijah slowly assembling the puzzle pieces in his head and swallowing hard.

Klaus said nothing, absolutely nothing. He just turned and started moving again. And he knew that his brother would follow him.

Suddenly the crowds grew bigger and the music louder. As Klaus turned around the next corner, he could see Elijah hesitantly following him. A staircase led down to another level. You could perfectly look into the small hall below from there and Klaus stopped after a few steps and his grin only widened.

His eyes fell on Elijah. He could see how every muscle in his body had tensed as he went down the few steps as if in a trance and stopped next to him.

Klaus watched his brother slide his eyes over the crowd that had formed around the black piano. It was so crowded that it was hard to find anyone in this crowd, but Elijah made it.

He inhaled sharply when he saw her.

Of course she was sitting in front of the grand piano, how could it be otherwise ?

She was wearing a short, airy summer dress and had her Y/H/C hair tied back in a loose bun. Her fingers, dancing over the piano keys, slowed slowly until the music stopped completely.

The crowd applauded and he heard her voice.

"Thanks !" She called. ,,Thank you very much !"

Elijah couldn't take his eyes off her. After all these years, she still looked like he remembered. Nothing had changed; she was still beautiful and again this woman had cast a spell over him - no, he had always been addicted to her.

"Before I went to Marcel 4 years ago, I asked Hayley for a favor. After we returned the night before yesterday, I redeemed it. "

She started to play again and the notes echoed up to the two brothers. Eljiah carefully watched her and Klaus could see him hold his breath with her first tones.

“Standing on the platform, watching you go. It's like no other pain, I've ever known. To love someone so much, you have no control."

Klaus' corners of his mouth went up a little when he saw his brother narrow his eyes as she sang and looked at her in disbelief.

"You told me she can't remember anything," Klaus went on now and let his gaze wander between Y/N and Elijah. “And she can't either, you compelled her. Still, her love for you was strong enough that a part of her subconscious still remembers. "

“I think I'm lost without you. I just feel crushed without you. I've been strong for long but I never thought how much I needed you. "

Elijah swallowed hard and Klaus could see his hands cling to the railing until his knuckles protruded white. Klaus could see it, could see the love and grief in his brother's eyes and the pain. But then all of that disappeared and was replaced by anger. He gritted his teeth and looked away from her in pain.

"Why am I here, Niklaus ?"

Klaus laughed softly. "Because this woman down there has still fallen for you, Elijah."

“She is safe here. We have only put her in danger with our presence. We have probably already brought our enemies here.”

Klaus became more serious. “Stop with these excuses and prevarications. This woman down there, she still loves you, despite of your self-sufficient behavior. "

"Self-sufficient ?”" Elijah hissed. ,, Our father pierced her with a stake. I'm sorry if you forgot that, but I still have the picture clearly in mind."

The blonde irritably rolled his eyes and gave Y/N a quick, thoughtful look. Elijah next to him snorted irritably.

"Rebekah told me how you felt in Freya’s Chambre de Chase."

Elijah grew calmer, more serious. He fixated Y/N and swallowed hard.

“Our sister worries in vain. I am fine."

"Elijah," Klaus began to persuade his brother. "Since you sent this woman away, you are no longer my brother, no longer the Elijah who would have given anything for love."

The addressee acidified wiped his lips. "I willingly sacrificed everything for this family, Niklaus. Don't let that be in vain. "

Klaus only laughed softly at his threat and leaned against the railing with his forearms now. "That was exactly your mistake."

He could see Elijah's glance in his direction, but he deliberately ignored him.

“When you sent this woman down there away, part of you went with her and don't dare to say that is a lie. Admittedly, maybe she was safer without you, without the knowledge of this world, but she was part of this family. And so far we have sacrificed everything for this family, everything for our Always and Forever.”

Klaus could see how his words seemed to move something in his brother. In the end, however, they only ensured that he decidedly pushed himself off the railing.

"I'm waiting for you by the car, brother."

The blonde derisively snorted as he watched from the corner of his eye how his brother was about to leave. No, he wouldn't allow that. He still had an ace up his sleeve.

"She is one of us now."

A confident smile crept onto Klaus' full lips when he saw from the corner of his eye how his brother stopped abruptly.

“Strangers rushing past, just tryna get home. You were the only save haven that I've known. Hits me at full speed, feel like I can't breath. And nobody knows this pain inside me, my world is trembling. I should've never let you go. "

Simultaneously with her voice, a small choir began to sing in the background, which caught Elijah's attention for a split second before his eyes went back to his brother, whose corner of his mouth had only risen more. He slowly climbed the stairs again until he was in the same place as before.

"I mean, of course she still can't remember anything. She was compelled by an original,” Klaus added quickly, but now he had the undivided attention of his brother, he was sure of that.

Elijah did the same now and supported himself with his forearms on the railing, watching Y/N closely.

"How ?" Was the only thing he asked.

"Your loved one ended up in Mystic Falls some time ago."

Elijah thoughtfully narrowed his eyes. The compelling really hadn't worked as well as it was had been supposed to. He didn't know if that should scare and please him. Y/N had loved him so much that her subconscious had fought it - and a small part seemed to have won the fight.

,,What happened ?"

Klaus cocked his head a little and let his eyes slide over the small gospel choir. “A certain Julian has contested the city from our dear Salvatore brothers. And your loved one didn't think it was necessary to observe a dozen warning signs and twenty thousand barrier tapes.”

Devotedly, Elijah closed his eyes and just listened to her voice for a moment.

"Fortunately, I still have friends in Mystic Falls."

Elijah glanced half-closed at his brother. "Let me guess: Caroline Forbes?"

Klaus' smug grin was enough for his brother as an answer, so that he ran his hand over his face.

Klaus shrugged. "Hayley made sure that her school got a substantial contribution."

Elijah thoughtfully chewed on his lower lip. Y/N's voice and those of the gospel choir still echoed through the corridors of the station and clouded his mind a little. But that she was now one of them did not change the fact that she would always be in danger as long as she was by his side. Loving any of them was a death sentence, Elijah knew this from personal experience. He couldn't risk her life again, not again. The pain was severe, but he could stand it as long as he knew she was out there somewhere, alive and well and not dead because of him.

"Our sister also told me about the dreams."

Elijah listened to his brother but didn't look at him as he said it. Rebekah had apparently chatted out of the sewing box, wonderful. He briefly winced when he felt his brother's hand on his shoulder.

“You are Elijah Mikaelson. The noble, selfless and honorable one of us. Rebekah once said something that manifested in my memory throughout the years that I succumbed to the agony of the dagger. He dedicates himself to everyone, but himself. Be selfish for once, brother. Do what is right for you. But I want you to know one thing: if you go down there, she is going to be a part of this family. A part of our Always and Forever. And none of us will ever let anyone harm her. ”

Elijah looked his brother in the eye and there he could see the truth in his words. Klaus nodded one last time until he disappeared.

“Standing on the platform, watching you go. You said 'I wanna see the world' and I said ... go. "

Y/N had just played the last notes when the applause broke out. Slowly, she opened her eyes and brushed a few tears from the corners of them. She didn't know how or why, but this very song always made her feel something. It was like memorabilia from another life pattering down onto her. But no pictures, feelings. She could feel the pain as if she had experienced it herself. She could feel the disappointment as if she had experienced it herself. And she could feel this strong love as if she had experienced it herself. These feelings had grown stronger after her transition and yet could not be assigned. It was like missing the one important piece of the puzzle that would complete the picture.

"Thanks," she said instead, forcing herself to smile as people continued to applaud. ,,Thank you."

She briefly chatted with the gospel choir who had approached her before the song and asked to be allowed to accompany her, and thanked them as the crowd around them slowly dissolved. People started to head back to their daily plans.

By the time she finished talking to the choir, nobody stood around her to watch her. She sighed and instead started to take the sheet music of the last song from the filing and sort it.

But this one, little breeze made her pause.

She was in a subway station. There were no breezes down here.

She looked up, confused. But before she could look around, she noticed her mason jar, which was in its usual place and filled with some pennies, with the only difference that it now contained a $ 50 bill.

Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion and she felt like she was having a deja-vu. She questioningly looked up and around for the one who would give her so much money.

And then she spotted him.

He was standing a few meters away from her, people just ran past him. And he just looked at her.

And when she looked at him, she knew it again. She knew everything again. She felt the pain and the disappointment and the love again. And she suddenly knew what the missing piece of the puzzle was all about.

He was standing straight, but he looked uncertain, almost hesitant. Especially when he noticed that she had spotted him. He shifted his weight restlessly from one leg to the other and swallowed.

Y/N could just look at him for a moment, she couldn't do anything else. Absentmindedly, she put the stack of music sheets to the side without taking her eyes off him.

And then her legs went back to work, taking slow steps towards him. Until she was right in front of him.

She eyed Elijah closely, just as he did to her. Her heart was pounding when all these memories finally became clear and the fog in her head slowly cleared and disappeared.

She lovingly looked at him, felt the urge to touch the now longer hair, but held back. She could hardly describe the relief she was experiencing. But then another feeling came up, which prevailed for a brief moment.

She swung out and a second later Elijah's cheek was adorned with a red handprint. Perplexed, his head had fallen to one side and he blinked several times in surprise at the strength of the single slap in the face. He tensed his jaw muscles to suppress the uncomfortable tingling and burning sensation and rubbed his dry lips. He slowly looked at her.

"Don’t you ever do that again," she irritably hissed and Elijah inhaled sharply. To be honest, her action shouldn't surprise him either. Her temperament had always been unpredictable.

He just looked at her. He didn't really know what to say to the slap in the face. But he could see her facial features softening and the suppressed tears still squeezing into the corners of her eyes.

"Okay, I can be angry with you afterwards."

At the same moment she pulled him down and pressed her lips to his.

The feeling was intoxicating, Elijah couldn't deny that. He immediately closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around her waist, pressing her so tightly to him that no sheet of paper would fit between the two. He could taste her tears on his lips and for a moment he wasn't sure if it was his own little one that had escaped one of his eyes.

He could feel her arms wrapped around his neck and her fingertips buried in the short hair there. Y/N's lips felt so soft and good that he prayed that this moment would never be over. He just wanted to stand there and hold and feel and taste her. He didn't want to let her go.

It was hard to tell what was missing until you found it. It had been that way so many years ago, and the last five years she hadn't been with him had been hell for him. He didn't like to admit it, but Niklaus had been right. A part of him had boarded this train with her back then; his heart.

Breathless, she pulled away from him and pressed her forehead against his. He gently ran his thumb along her cheek, brushing away the traces of tears. He could feel her breath on his skin and he looked at her lovingly.

"Never go away again."

Elijah nodded as she tightened her arms around his neck and buried her face in it. He closed his eyes and hugged her even tighter. “I promise."

Elijah didn't see his brother, didn't know he was watching them.

Klaus stood a little apart, out of his brother's line of sight, and smiled contentedly - one of the few honest smiles known from the hybrid. "Always and forever, brother," he said softly. "Always and forever."

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irelise · 4 years

Text

Fic “Behind the Scenes” - Alex Rider

Trying to dip my toes back into writing, so I thought I’d ramble about some fics I’ve already written! This started off as ranting about my title choice and how they’re usually Final Fantasy XIV songs I butcher in order to forcibly fit the fic, but it expanded into musings about things that didn’t make the cut into the final fic, and potential sequels/things that happen down the line.

Just doing Alex Rider fics for now since that’s my current active fandom, but drop me an ask if there are any fics you’re especially interested in from any fandom!

Starting off with: Time (2368 words, gen, Alex & Yassen focused) aka my untagged Inception-flavoured AU where the plot twist was that it was a dream all along That said, this title was probably one of the easiest to come up with and was obviously from the main theme of Inception, Time! Which is fantastic like the whole movie aaaa i love Inception AUs and this fic is probably the one I’m most likely to expand into longfic if I dredge up the motivation from somewhere. It would be a mission style fic, possibly a heist, where Alex and Yassen are seemingly working together in order to steal some valuable intel from another group. Of course, it’s all a dream! Through copious dream symbolism and mind fuckery the real mission was set up by MI6 for Alex to extract intel from Yassen, who by this point is steadily losing his grip on dreams and reality after months, possibly years, spent under sedation.

Yassen has a few tricks up his sleeve, though. He’s aware that he’s (probably) dreaming and he can see the fractures in Alex’s resolve after such a long time of being used and manipulated by MI6. It would only take a little nudge to get Alex to defect -- or, at the very least, to escape.

So while Alex is busy trying to extract information from Yassen, Yassen is trying to do the opposite: inception.

The rest below cut for length and also because they’re nsfw since most of my writing was for the kink meme! Warning for general fucked-upness and unhealthy relationships

at the end, on a dusty road (8154 words, Yassen/Alex) aka the reputation sabotage fic, aka where’s part 3b?!

Title from Origa’s Polyushka Polye:

The wind scatters your brave songs Across the green field. Songs of the past, Leaving them alone with your glory, And right at the end, on a dusty road…

i just wanted something wistful and Russian about past soldiers and fading glory ok....... I came pretty close to titling the fic leaving them alone with your past glory but decided it didn’t make much sense out of context.

ANYWAY my first Yalex fic! Very much inspired by a hodgepodge of comments on Discord about how MI6 would react if they ever saw Yassen paying Alex visits in the middle of the night - “Could they be exchanging information?” “The whole night? Maybe the answer is something more obvious...”

ANYWAY the ending at the moment is pretty open - there’s two main ways I see it going:

1) Yassen comes back shortly afterwards, realises he had fucked up colossally, stays and helps Alex rebuild even though Alex (very justifiably) no longer trusts him. Very slow reconciliation and healing but ultimately happy ending.

2) aka the one where I broke Nanibun’s shipper heart over Discord: Alex and Yassen eventually reunite, but it isn’t until years later, when Alex is nearing middle age and Yassen has faded into obscurity. Alex managed to pick up the pieces of his life and even moved on properly from MI6, and now lives a fulfilling life. Married, 2.5 kids, white picket fence, the whole lot. So what if his marriage is more for partnership than for love? He’s content with the direction his life had taken and has strong ties to his community. He even managed to forgive Yassen, even though it took him a long time.

He and Yassen meet for the last time in a sunlit cafe in spring. Alex looks at Yassen and sees only a stranger with lines crinkling under his eyes.Yassen is getting old, he realizes. He thinks he should be happy that Yassen even had the chance to get old, but all he feels is relief that their paths had diverged. Alex is done with that life and he can never trust Yassen again. All that old passion had burned away to nothing, not even a flickering flame. Even though the initial parting had been painful, Alex had managed to find peace long ago, and he hopes Yassen will be able to do the same. But it's a distant, unemotional hope, the sort of hope you'd have for a distant acquaintance you haven't seen in years. The type of well wishes that are etiquette more than actual sentiment.

He's glad when their drinks are finished and Yassen melts away into the chattering springtime crowd, one final dangling chapter of his life closed at last.

...............or, 3) Alex throws himself into increasingly dangerous situations in an attempt to feel something and dies young.

(part 3b is coming someday i swear! it’s the alternate path where Yassen has second thoughts, tells Alex the truth, and doesn’t send the sex tape to MI6)

---

Lemniscate (3562 words, Julia Rothman/Yassen) Not a whole lot to say about this one, except after I finished I realised it was really similar to another fic I previously wrote which also involved a young man desperate to reinvent himself completely being taken advantage of by his superior............ i have a Type

Title - I was jamming out to Locus while writing this which is a song all about an inability to escape from cycles - When fighting back right out of this system/Means falling back right into this space ; When falling back is better than simply/Falling back into pieces again - but it was long and unwieldy so I thought about shortening it to Moebius but that was a bit overdone... In the end I settled with Lemniscate which is also an infinity symbol, Moebius-like shape. Mostly it’s a reference to how Yassen never quite breaks free of his “cycle” even though he’s with Scorpia now - he was Sharkovsky’s slave and bedwarmer and...now he plays basically the same role for Julia Rothman. (Just with a bit more murder and moral erosion!)

---

This probably needs a special content warning - major character death (gun suicide from the second Russian roulette scene), gore, necrophilia

closing the circle (3650 words, John Rider & Yassen) aka is it still a gen fic if there’s offscreen necrophilia?

This was originally written for a kink meme prompt for corpse mutilation + necrophilia but then the John and Yassen plot thread kind of took over and I never actually ended up writing the gory stuff oops since it was too out of place compared to the rest. So everything below can be considered not “canon” since the fic diverged so heavily from its original plan (which is why the section numbers skip around - I cut out Yassen’s bits). But if you’re curious, here’s the details for what I originally planned to happen to Yassen (well, his corpse) and the Sharkovsky family, copy-pasted straight from my notes and full of as much karma as I could stuff in:

Yassen’s death, Sharkovsky shoves his fingers in the bullet hole and spits on the body in disgust. Yassen regains consciousness halfway through this; he can feel what Sharkovsky is doing

Ivan comes running in, attracted by the sound of the gunshot. Sharkovsky tells him to do what he likes with the body as long as it’s disposed of in the end. Necrophilia scene? Afterwards Ivan disposes of the body by locking it in the cellar alone with the Dalmatian for a few days

Yassen starts getting his revenge. Ivan is the first to go when he comes to let the Dalmatian out – the Dalmatian savages him and tears out his throat before it’s finally shot. Yassen’s bones get buried along with the Dalmatian. Ivan’s body is kept in the cold storage room in the basement where they kept the old food taster’s body while they decide what to do with him.

Maya, Sharkovsky’s wife, is next. She passes away in the middle of the night. Sharkovsky wakes up next to a cooling corpse.

There are whispers that there is some sort of curse. One of the maids talk about finding blood on the carpet of Sharkovsky’s study. She’s the next to disappear. Some other workers stop turning up.

Finally it’s Sharkovsky’s turn. He dies of poison. The dacha burns down that same night.

A Scorpia agent was sent to tie up loose ends (Scorpia didn’t know Sharkovsky is already dead); Yassen kills him too. He has no loyalty to Scorpia and just wants to be left alone.

Hunter is sent to investigate. He and Yassen talk, in the end, Hunter invites Yassen to come with him, Yassen agrees. But when they leave the dacha and Hunter looks back, he finds that Yassen is gone.

And an excerpt:

Yassen is dead. He does not remember dying. There are some things the human mind tries to shield itself from, and the memory of a bullet traveling through bone and brain to erupt on the other side in a shower of gore is one of those things.

Yassen is dead. He had hoped death would mean oblivion. At his most naïve and optimistic, he had hoped death would mean reunion. Happiness. A return to simpler days.

He discovers, instead, that death is not so different from life, except he is even more powerless now than before.

There is a body on the floor of Sharkovsky’s study. Its hair had once been pale white-blond, but now it is matted with coagulating blood. That same blood spreads in a dark pool against the carpet, clotting the fibres together into ugly clumps, stiff and flaking. The fire in the hearth is still burning sullenly. Its light glistens against the grotesque strands of viscera splattered against the ground, the furniture, the wall. A round hole had been punched into the side of the corpse’s head, piercing bone and brain. That was how the man who had once been Yassen Gregorovich had killed himself. The fingers of the corpse remain loosely curled around the old-fashioned revolver that had been the instrument of death.

The only living person in the room rises slowly from his wheelchair. Sharkovsky’s skeletal face is twisted into an ugly grimace of anger. He totters over to the corpse, nudging it with the tip of one polished leather shoe. “Waste of time,” he says coldly. “Ruining a perfectly good carpet, and for what?”

In a sudden fit of temper, he lashes out with a kick. Once, it would have been strong enough to break several ribs (Yassen knows from intimate experience). Now, the corpse merely flops limply to one side. It incenses Sharkovsky further. He drops heavily to his knees, breathing harshly, and backhands the corpse across the face with one shaking hand.

#fandom: alex rider #My writing #meta

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mimikametamorphosis · 4 years

Text

Friend

My friend, he thought. He knew she was more than that. She was a hero worthy of legends and sonnets; the Goddess incarnate herself. She was his professor, his Teach. She was the stars the in the sky looking at him and guiding him every step of the way. She was the dawn that he had been waiting for all his life, the light that would lead him to where he wanted to be. She was Byleth.

He thought that time would ease what he felt but it did not. In fact, it was the same as before -- or so he'd like to tell himself. This wasn't the first time he's felt this: a buzzing in his brain that refused to go away; a twitch at the corner of his mouth; and an involuntary curving of his hand into a fist. Their paths had crossed frequently as of late and he could not help but feel a twinge of annoyance well up in his chest. He hoped it never showed on his face because he wanted to keep as many useful people as his allies considering their circumstances. Most importantly, any sign of weakness was an unwelcome dent in his armor.

He found it odd, he admitted to himself. They had gotten along amicably over the last five years, working together towards their shared goal but once they had achieved it, something in their dynamic had changed. He had pondered on what had changed between them but seeing her pale green eyes look at him everyday made him realize that it was in front of him the whole time. Loath to admit that it was something so trivial, Claude shook his head.

It was morning yet he felt as though he'd already gone through the day with all the mental gymnastics he's done. He pushed off his blanket and dressed himself. There was a war council that day and he was scheduled to train with the professot after. He chuckled at the thought of training with their professor after five years. He thought it was silly the first time Byleth had suggested it. They had not seen each other for five years and she insisted that they continue with their training as though only a day had passed since they last saw her.

Training with Teach, he mused as he laced his undershirt. Glad that some things don't have to change.

He took out a long-sleeved doublet from his closet. It was made of gold silk, with maroon trimmings and lapels. It was his one of the simpler ones his late grandfather owned and it was easier to discard this once he began training. He wore it over his undershirt and buttoned it. He slipped on his trousers and went on his way.

“Everyone here?”

Claude heard Byleth from outside the war room. He could've entered as soon as he arrived but he wanted to have a bit of fun to shake off all the annoyance felt this morning. He stood with his back against the door and listened.

He knew that Byleth inspected each one of them and that she noticed that her tactician had not yet arrived.

"Where are Claude and Yuri?"

The corners of his lips twitched.

“I'm sure they're on their way, Professor," Hilda yawned. “Maybe they just couldn't shake off the sleepies right away.”

“Surely Claude understands that he should not keep the rest of us waiting,” Lorenz huffed. “It is absolutely unbecoming of a noble, much less the head of the Alliance!"

And there was his source of fun.

“It's too early for that, Lorenz,” Leonie chided. “Lighten up will you? Besides, we all came here early. The war council isn't meant to start until after five minutes.”

“If he can keep dilly-dallying, then maybe he can also relieve himself of his headship and give it to someone who can— ”

Maybe it was time to make his entrance.

"Easy, Lorenz," Claude said as he entered the room, his hands up in mock surrender. "Relax, I'm here. No need to get your breeches in a knot because you missed me so much."

“To mock instead of apologizing for his indescretion; how unbecoming,” Lorenz spat as he glared at Claude.

Claude simply replied with a lopsided smile and patted Byleth's shoulder as he sat down on her right.

"Well, my frie—"

"Looks like I'm the last to arrive, friend."

And so it starts: the buzzing in his head had begun.

Yuri entered the room and sat on Byleth's left, placing himself directly in front of Claude.

“Alright, everyone, let's begin.”

Byleth turned to Yuri.

"Do you have any information for us, Yuri? I heard that your channels have come by some useful information."

"Naturally," Yuri said as he bowed his head.

"I also have useful information regarding our next battle," Claude began. He felt Hilda bristle at his side. It made him adjust his tone to a more amicable one.

"It seems Lord Gwendal of House Rowe will be riding to meet us at Ailell. He'll be coming with an army to stop us from meeting with House Daphnel. We're still checking our ranks to see who leaked the information. We have a number of former Kingdom soldiers that have joined our ranks once the heads of Houses Gautier, Galatea, and Fraldarius joined our army. No offense to the three of you."

He nodded in the direction of Sylvain, Ingrid, and Felix.

"None taken," Sylvain replied nonchalantly. "This is war, afterall. Nothing, not even loyalty, is certain."

"Thanks for that. Moving on, so far, we've narrowed it down to three possible candidates and two are from the Kingdom. We'll be probing them once we—"

"There is no need," Yuri said coolly. "My men have sniffed out the rat."

"You have?"

Byleth looked at him and he smiled at her.

Claude felt a small prick at his temple.

"Excellent work, Yuri," Claude managed to say through a stiff smile. He rested his elbows on the table and laced his hands in front of him. "You could have said so sooner."

"You were talking and you had valuable information I could work on," Yuri said simply.

"Good, I'll leave the matter of the rat to both of you since you're both our spymasters anyway," Byleth said with finality. "We must move on to our formations. Please open the map at the center of the table."

Byletyh took a small, open chest of wooden figures amd started placing them on the map. Claude watched as each labelled piece found itself atop the rocky fields of Ailell. He would question some of her decisions once she had laid them all out which was how she had always preferred it.

"Hey," Yuri said, "I think you might want to put your battalion a little far off than there, friend."

"Yuri," Byleth said, looking at him pointedly, "please let me finish."

This earned a smug smile from Claude which he hid behind his laced fingers. He could feel someone looking at him and true enough, he saw Hilda looking at him with a bewildered expression. He leaned in to whisper into her ear.

"I know strategy's not your strongesr suit," Claude began, "what's on your mind?"

"This looks simple enough, Claude," Hilda retorted. "I'm just wondering what's up with you and him." She shifted her eyes to Yuri's direction. He was now helping Byleth lay out the rest of the figures as she instructed him.

"Nothing's up," Claude said simply.

"Sure, and I want to go on the frontlines," Hilda said as she rolled her eyes. "You're acting funny."

"Well, I don't see you laughing," he countered with a lopsided smile.

Hilda huffed and leaned back into her seat, clearly turned off by his dismissal of the topic. He decided to scan the figures and their respective positions on the map. While he knew his professor was good at tactics, he found some questionable decisions sprawled across the field. He will point it out later once they had started but something else else caught his eye.

He saw Byleth reach out for the small chest at the same time Yuri did. Their hands touched, Yuri's hand over Byleth's. Claude found that their hands stayed that way a little too long for his liking. Yuri kept his hand over Byleth's until she moved hers away.

“Oh. I'm sorry, Yuri,” Byleth said with a hint of surprise in her voice.

"There you go being cute again," Yuri said with a cheeky grin as he returned the chest to its original place.

"Shall we start?" Yuri sat down and rested his cheek on one of his hands, looking slyly at Byleth.

Claude couldn't help but be disinterested for most of the council but he didn't forget to question her formations. Still, his mind couldn't help but wander throughout the rest of the war council after that distraction.

He listened intently to each of them — even Yuri — as they gave their suggestions but his mind was split between formulating his schemes for the upcoming battle and understanding the annoyance brewing slowly in his chest.

"Claude," Byleth began. He was shook out of his thoughts and, in that split second, he managed to recall the general gist of what they were talking about. "Do you agree with what we've planned? You are our master tactician afterall. Do you need more time to think this through?"

He looked at the clock behind Yuri's head. It was a little past one o'clock. He didn't have enough energy to do a sweeping review of their batteplan as of the moment and decided to distract himself.

"I think," he began, "its time for some lunch. I'll get back to you on that, my friend. For now, I'm starving."

"You're distracted," Byleth said as she disarmed Claude for the third time in their training session. His sword flew to the floor with a loud clang.

"Again," she said, going into position. She pointed her rapier at him while her other hand was tucked behind her. "Pick up your sword, Claude."

Claude ran his hand threw his hair, shaking out small beads of sweat. He had already shed his doublet and tossed it near the weapons rack. He picked up his sword, piqued at himself for not performing well.

He swung his blade side to side, trying to shake off his ill feelings. He bended his knees and pointed his broadsword towards Byleth, looking her straight in the eye. Yes, those pale green eyes. They were a darker color before but it was what it was now.

Byleth charged at him swiftly, her nimble steps barely making any sound as she rushed towards him. He parried her strike with his sword while she let her blade slide along the length of his, creating sparks in its wake.

Strong as always, he thought to himself, a small smirk forming in his lips.

Her eyes stayed focused on his. He could see fire, determination. She never liked losing no matter what cool, blank facade she wore. It was there in her eyes, like glowing embers being stoked in a fire. He wished to reflect the same towards her. He hated losing which was why he always had contingencies. So long as they never have his head, he has not lost. He doesn't want to lose, he admits, not here, or in any other area that mattered to him and that included her.

He placed his forearm against the flat of his blade and pushed hard against her. She backed away a few paces but she charged at him again, ready to swing her sword. He ducked and aimed to slash her abdomen. She jumped to the side and turned on her heels, slashing a part of his arm in the process.

Claude winced in pain as his torn sleeve began to soak in some of his blood. The cut was shallow and it stung when his sweat dripped on it. He holds up his hand to signal a short reprieve as he tears the rest of his sleeve. Byleth however continued to charge towards him. She swung her blade at his abdomen and he narrowly evaded it.

“Teach,” he gasped, “go easy now. This isn't the battlefield yet.”

“It isn't,” Byleth said matter-of-factly. “If it were you'd be dead. You're not a child, Claude. Brave through your wound and fight.”

He smiled to himself and charged at her. She stepped to the side but he sent a sweeping kick into her direction. She barely dodged it and quickly leapt away from Claude to steady herself.

“Better,” she said, a small smile gracing her face. “Fight with your body. Your sword is just an extension.”

Fight like a mercenary, you mean, Claude thought fondly.

It was one of the first things she taught them when she became their professor. It was a memorable day when she went through six Knights of Seiros, all of them fighting nobly, relying only on their weapons. All of them beaten down with dents in their armor. She served to prove a point that fighting with what you have was not any less noble than relying on your weapon. After all, chivalry and decorum were forgotten philosophies on the battlefield.

He was caught off guard for a moment and had the wind knocked out of him with a strong hit to his chest. He didn't notice Byleth while he was reminiscing. His breathless state was just a reminder of how he always was when she'd come crashing through his defenses.

Breathless, he thought, you always leave me like that.

“Focus, Claude!”

He wondered if it was mean of him to relish when she would display irritation towards him. It was a rare delight to see her frustrated. He had done so many things when he was younger to rile her up and ruffle her feathers but she never reacted the way she did now. After five years, she seemed different, as though life was breathed into her that she started to show different sides of her, even if it was only with him.

He stood up from his crouched position and charged towards her, matching her nimble movements as she dodged out his way.

Turn

He turned to his side and parried away her blade. Her grip was strong, he knew, and it would take much more force for her to let go. He could feel a surge in his body and he knew his crest had activated. Not one to waste an oppurtunity, he slashed away in her direction with increasing force. She barely had time to dodge him and was nicked in the arm. His wound felt hot and he could see that it started to close. He charged at her once again and repeatedly slashed at her until he backed her into one of the pillars in the training grounds; his sword's edge lightly pressed against her throat.

“You'd be dead if this wasn't training, my friend,” he said in between ragged breaths. He gave her a cheeky smile and she gave him a bigger smile in turn.

There you go being cute again, he thought, smiling to himself. Realizing this, he shook his head and frowned.

“Are you alright?”

Byleth asked, the slightest hint of worry showing on her brows. He pressed his forehead against hers for an instant and pulled back.

“I'm sorry,” he said, his breathing slowly stabilizing. “I just have a lot of things on my mind.”

“We can talk about the plan later if you like,” Byleth offered. “Just the two of us this time since we'll be leading them”

He wondered if she had gotten better at reading people but he knew better. She was talking simply and practically.

“I'll get back to you on that, Teach,” he said as he fished his doublet off the floor.

Byleth returned their used weapons to their racks and walked towards Claude. She was combing the tangles out of her hair and trying to clean some grime of her face with the palm of her hand.

Claude chuckeld. She was adorable, indeed.

“Is something the matter?”

“No, my friend, here,” Claude took out his handkerchief and gave it to her. "Keep it. I have a lot of those anyway."

"Hey, my friend," Claude said as he patted Byleth's shoulder.

“Oh, Claude,” Byleth was surprised, her green eyes widening a bit at the sight of him. "I thought you were Yuri."

He laughed it off. Frustration was brewing inside of him but he pushed it deep within himself and hoped it wouldn't surface again.

“I'm offended, Teach,” Claude said with what he hoped was mock annoyance. “I think I look more dashing than he does.”

Byleth let out a small chuckle. Whether she agreed at the thought of it or laughed at him was moot. He loved any display of emotion she offered.

“So, is this seat taken?”

“No,” Byleth gestured for him to sit down. "Go on and sit."

“Are you expecting, Yuri?”

Claude said before spooning a bit of food in his mouth to stop him from saying something he didn't want.

“No,” she said. “It's just that he often calls me ‘friend’.”

“I call you ‘my friend’,” Claude pointed out. “Do they sound so similar to you?”

“No,” Byleth looked at him, at his eyes. He was right to think that she had gotten better at reading people, him in particular. She was searching for something. “I suppose not.”

“See, Teach? I am one of a kind afterall. The one and only, Claude von Reigan. I don't think anyone can top that."

Byleth let out a small laugh. It tickled his ears. He wanted more of it

“On second thought,” Byleth began, “it is similar. You and Yuri are similar in your own ways but different.”

His heart sank. Was he really no different to her? All those times they had steeled away, just the two of them, planning their next move in an upcoming battle and sleeping against each other when they were tired out. All those times she would drape a blanket over his shoulders when she thought he had fallen asleep in the war room. Or when she would bring him a breakfast tray the next day and chat with him when he woke up. Were they all so commonplace to her?

They might be Claude taught, his shoulders slumping in defeat. A sad smile spread across his face. She was kind, afterall. She would always check up on everyone after each battle; even being a shoulder to cry on. She understood very little of emotion but she tried her best to be there for everyone. He figured maybe he had read into their interactions far too deeply. Whether it was wishful thinking or a frivolous distraction, he didn't know. It may be best to stop it now before he suffers further.

“Different good, right?” He offered her.

“Yes,” she said with a small smile.

“Well, Teach” he said as he stood up from his seat, “I'd better head off and sleep. You really gave me a beating today.”

“False humility,” she muttered before taking a sip of water. “You beat me fair and square, Claude. I think I might go to you for training sessions instead.”

“Yeah? I'll look forward to them.”

He excused himself and disposed of his tray in the kitchens. He pushed past the big wooden doors of the Dining Hall and savored the evening air. He saw the moon glimmering over the lake.

He sat on the edge of the fishing platform outside of the Dining Hall, dangling his legs over the barely stirring waters of the lake. Most of the fish were probably resting, he thought, and so should he. Still, his mind was abuzz with the events today.

He knew Byleth had joined Yuri in the sauna after their training session so he decided it was best to leave them be instead of worming his way into their plans. Yuri wasn't someone he wanted to openly antogonize since he had no reason to. He had not done anything to deserve that, he thought. He stretched his hands above his head and leaned back on the platform. He felt at peace looking at the sky.

It was night now, the stars shined against a deep, dark canvas overhead. He loved to look at the stars. It reminded him of how small his troubles were. There was a bigger world out there, bigger than the ones he'd always known. Anticipation and excitement were building in him. Each battle was a step closer to that world. Soon, they'll wake up to a new dawn just as they did when she returned to them, to him.

Friend, he thought ruefully. Friend, alright. Your friend who's being cute. Who's strong enough to beat six knights in single combat.

He sat up and rested his forearms on his thighs. He let out a sad chuckle.

Your friend who always leaves you breathless.

True. She always did. It took her disappearance for him to understand that. There was not a day when he would stop looking for her, teaming up with Yuri to find out where she had gone. Five years of non-stop searches only to have her appear at the Goddess Tower on the day of the would-be Millenium Festival. Auspicious, some would call it — Divine Intervention, even. The Goddess herself has returned and promised a new dawn for all in the land.

He understood that she mattered to him more than as a means for him to achieve his goals; she had not been that to him for so long. He doesn't rememebr when but it came so gradually it was hard to trace. It mattered not to him. What mattered was that he wanted to see that new dawn with her by his side.

His heart began to beat faster. He knew what it meant. If only he had pondered the lingering thoughts and feelings he had buried in the recesses of his heart maybe things would be clearer for him. Who had that luxury in war? One had to survive and that was a privilege and not a right. To think of his feelings right now was a luxury stolen from others that's why he never bothered understanding his own heart. It never sat well for him to consider his own feelings when those around him barely had the chance to do so or had lost theirs when he trampled on their corpses on the battlefield. How many of those men and women had their own feelings that were now lost to memory?

Maybe, he can indulge in this selfishness for once so that he can focus on what needed to be done; get it out of the way before it becomes something he cannot handle in the future. He always stamped down any trivial feelings he had, they were nothing but flights of fancy. And maybe, what he felt for her was too.

She was Byleth: his Teach, his stars, and his dawn. Most of all, she was the most important to him in the world right now.

“My love,” he said quietly. Yes, his love. My friend was always my love.

He looked at the lake somberly with his realization. He would do anything for her smile, her laugh. Anything to see her happy. This new dawn was more for her than it is for him. For her to live a new life away from all the tragedies that befell her. A new life where maybe she can love an outsider if she knew how or even one where she'd let him. He had enough love for the both of them.

He wondered if Yuri meant the same when he calls her friend. Were his feelings as strong as his? Did he view Byleth the same way he did?

He remembered he asked her out on a date when they were still students. Claude listened in on their conversation. He realized that his irritation started then. How brazen was he to ask her out? He was a student and she was a professor. He knew however that Byleth understood what it was, though not fully, at the time. He understood too despite himself.

Trivial, he thought. Nevertheless, a distraction.

He tucked his hands beneath his head and lied down on the platform again.

It's time to say goodbye to this for now. We need to concentrate on the war.

Claude wondered if his feelings would die down like he'd hoped despite his proximity to her. She was always by his side that it seemed natural; their dynamics had shifted greatly after five years.

“Well, goodbye for now,” he said softly, his eyes looking at the stars above. “Maybe when the war is over, we could sort it all out."

“Sort what out?”

He bolted upright and turned behind him to see Byleth walking towards him. She sat next to him, her legs dangling over the lake. She looked at him questioningly.

“I know better than to ask what's on your mind,” Byleth started. “I know there are many things.”

“True,” Claude agreed with a soft chuckle.

“You're too distracted lately, Claude,” Byleth said as she leaned closer to him. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

“It's not really something you can help me with, Teach,” Claude said, wistfully looking at the lake. “Not now, at least. Maybe after the war if you're still interested.”

“I don't understand you in many ways, Claude,” Byleth began as she looked to the lake as well. “You always seem to be hiding something. It's not something I understand.”

It's true. She cannot understand. She was an open-book after all. She had no secrets that she willingly kept unlike him. He had many.

Silence fell between them. The sound of cicadas filled their ears.

What was he to say?

Speechless, he thought. Breathless and speechless in so many ways.

“I don't care about your secrets, Claude,” she said, finally. “If there are things you refuse to tell me, then I cannot do anything about them. What matters is you and that you're okay.”

He looked at her. She was staring at the moon now. Her face glowed beneath the moonlight and her eyes reflected the sparkling stars. Unpretentious and unassuming, that's what she was. He never saw her as pretty but she was indeed beautiful in all her innocence and purity. Despite all the blood in her hands over years of battle, she was clean. There was nothing tainted within her. She was as transparent as the waters beneath them yet just as deep. She knew not the intricacies of his life and maybe that's better that way.

“Thanks, Teach,” Claude said after a pause. That was all he could think of saying.

“We'll sort out your problems if you want,” she offered. “Or if I can't help you the least I could do is stay by your side.”

He sat closer to her but they avoided looking at each other.

“Is that a promise, Teach?”

It was different to want that of her and to hear her say it. It felt exhilarating, in fact. It may mean different things to them but he took delight in hearing it. A small consolation for an otheewise trying day.

Byleth turned to him and smiled with squinted eyes. He had never seen her smile like that before. His heart beat faster. He wanted to grab her and pull her into his arms and never let her go. He wanted her to be his but only time will tell if that were possible.

“Yes. Always.”

“Thank you, Teach,” he said as he brought her hand to his lips to kiss her knuckles. “You don't know how much that means to me.”

He felt her hand bristle under his lips but she didn't slip away from his grip. She held on tighter. He looked at her through his fringe as he looked up slightly. She was looking at him with a warm smile and what appeared to be a dust of blush on her cheeks.

He smiled. His heart felt warm and full at the sight of her. He barely understood this feeling but he liked it. He felt that wherever his ambitions might take him, he'll always long to feel this again with her. An outsider like him couldn't understand what this was but maybe one day, he will. One day, he'll have a name for it too but for now, her name will suffice. Wherever in the world Claude was, he'll always search for this feeling with Byleth.

“Teach, I think it's a bit late now,” Claude said as he turned back to see the that Dining Hall lights were now extinguished. “Maybe we should head back to our rooms.”

“Maybe we can stay a while,” Byleth said looking at the moon with soft smile. Her smile seemed almost private and that he was intruding into whatever she was feeling but he felt privileged that she let her guard down around him.

“Alright, my friend,” he began, noticing that she hadn't let go of his hand since he kissed it. “Anything for you.”

Byleth held on to his hand the entire time they looked at the moon. He'll never forget the way it felt to hold her hand in his. He wanted this feeling to last a lifetime and he'll spend the rest of life making sure it happens.

#claude von riegan #byleth #fe3h claude #fe3h byleth #claude x byleth #byleth x claude #fe3h #Fire Emblem: Three Houses

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threewaysdivided · 3 years

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Hello! I'm currently fighting with writing, myself. My protags have a habit of getting away from me. Have any tales of your YJDW where the characters just... decide to take a narrative swing to the left when your outline clearly heads right?

Hi there!

So this particular problem isn't one I've had much of when it comes to the actual writing side, which I think is mostly down to my particular writing preferences.

On the scale of planning to pantsing I tend to fall very heavily on the planner side (I've joked about it before but I do actually have most of YJ:DW planned in a fair amount of detail right up to the ending). Partly because my brain just goes a lot faster than my hands can write/type out complete sentences, partly because I like to have a fairly complete idea of the final product before I start work, and partly because the way I naturally engage with things leans more towards analysis than storytelling (I mean, I have a whole dedicated tag for essays on my blog). There's also that, at least when it comes to fanfic I'd actually publish, yes I know that's just one right now I tend to want to have an idea/concept/emotion to explore and also an idea of how to bring it to a satisfying conclusion.

The long and the short of it is that, because I tend to do most of my story-crafting before I actually get to the prose, and because I often end up reverse-engineering/ puzzle-solving chunks of the story around an idea/scene/character moment I want to include, those kinds of characters-derail-the-story or story-takes-a-hard-left-turn moments tend to happen at the planning phase. I'll be looking back over a planned scene/plot and decide that something doesn't feel right or that I'm not sold that my version of the character would believably act like that in those circumstances, or some other part of my brain will pop up from below the desk and slap down a thought like "hey, have you considered that you could get to your goal in a completely different way by adding this idea?"

(Not to claim that any approach to writing is better than another - I have a lot of respect for the confidence, vision and sheer productivity it takes to set out on a long-fic with only a loose idea of where it's heading and the belief that the journey itself is worth it - but one thing I will say for planning is that is does lower the associated "costs" of making big story changes since it's a lot simpler/faster to change or shuffle dot points than to cut, add and rewrite huge swarths of prose not that I don't also do that in the writing phase for some chapters. It's a difference in preference; planner-style leans towards space for analysis during "preproduction" while pantser-style puts it in more at the edit.)

Usually by the time I get to actually writing things in story form I'm pretty comfortable that I've created a plotline/scenario where the characters will follow at least central thread of what's happening. More often what I get in terms of "going off script" is less derailing the scene and more like an actor deciding to ad-lib, improvise or play with a conversation during a take - they'll add a quip or get distracted by a related topic or decide to do something on the side or they might suddenly say something more insightful than originally planned.

Generally I'm okay with keeping this kind of stuff in so long as what they're saying/doing doesn't contradict, change or accidentally accelerate the story/their arc to a later stage that it's supposed to be at - it helps things feel a bit more naturalistic and if they're really going off-track I can always have other characters pull them back on topic, the same way it might happen in a real conversation.

So yeah, I won't say it doesn't happen but just the way I prefer to write means that it tends to happen less often and in smaller ways than for other people.

But that probably isn't super useful for helping with your writing-fighting so, without knowing the specifics, here are some things that could be useful.

Maybe consider stopping to do a little bit of analysis of your story:

Is there a idea(s)/concept(s) that your story is really about/ interested in exploring? Don't worry if what you come up with isn't super neat or precise, I still don't think I could give a fully comprehensive description of what YJ:DW is about in terms of "theme" or "message".

Who are you characters: what do they want, what do they need, what do they think they need, what is their take on the situation they're in, how do they see the world, how accurate/ biased is that worldview, what sort of things interest them and why, what insecurities/ phobias/ dislikes do they have and why, why do they act the way that they do?

What is the main purpose of this scene/plot point and what essential thing(s), piece(s) of information, interaction(s) need to be covered to serve that purpose?

If you stepped back from the needs of the story and just looked at these characters in the situation you've created, how do you feel they would act? Does it line up?

It also might be worth looking at what your protagonists/ characters end up doing in the moments when they try to derail your story, and seeing if you can figure out any potential reasons for why it might be feeling more natural/ the momentum might be stronger in that direction. They might be going "off script" but are they also going off point or are they heading towards the same/ a similar point in a different way than what you originally planned?

It could be that there's a conflict between what you want to have happen and what you've set up to have happen, and that reworking the scene or preceding scene(s) to better direct the characters based on how they've been established to react to things might get them to behave.

It also might be that some unconscious part of your brain has worked out a different route to the same goal and is trying to send you down that path. Or your brain could potentially have identified (or even misidentified) a pattern in the story/character(s) and is trying to communicate that to you through them. It could be that there's some contradiction between what you've established/have planned for the character(s)/story overall, and what's happening in the details of the specific scene that's causing them to break ranks. Sidenote: I just want to point out that this doesn't necessarily mean that what you had originally planned is somehow inherently "worse" or "wrong". Sometimes your brain might be defaulting toward what feels familiar from common tropes in the media you consume because "this is just what happens in these stories", or it might be trying to move a scene that is in some way challenging more towards your existing comfort zones as a writer. On a deeper level, asking "why does this feel correct to me" can also be useful.

Generally though, I think that your plan and your characters/story being out of step with each other is a bit like an indicator light on a car. As much as we like to enjoy the fantasy that these characters and worlds are real and separate from us and not fully under our control, and as much as stepping away from that can sometimes "kill the magic", it's worth stopping to pop the hood or stick our heads behind the curtain sometimes to make sure everything is working in sync and going in the direction it's meant to. Plus, you might learn some new things about your story/world/characters in the the process that end up being useful later.

Hope this helps!

#young justice: deathly weapons #characters #character misbehaviour #writing #story-crafting #writing advice #anonymous #3WD Answers #I have a pet theory that a lot of this kind of thing comes down to us as a species being geared towards pattern recognition #the phrase 'you might not have noticed it but your brain did' exists for a reason #I do wonder if sometimes this is our brains coming up with creative ways to flag a pattern or a devation from a patter #Or suddenly making an extrapolation/interpolation to fill in a gap based on the existing 'facts' of the world/story #In my case though usually it involves the characters getting a lot more quippy/snarky/silly than is needed by the plan #which is nice - it makes them feel more like actual people #I'm working on Chapter 18 and Wally & Sphere decided to have a quippy bit of back and forward in the middle of a tense scene #and it's funny so I'm probably going to keep it #I wish my writing stories were more fun to share but a lot of it is just me being a ~ neeeeerrrrrrd ~

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prettywordsyouleft · 5 years

Text

Past And Present (Choose What I Write Story)

Summary: you believed that you had met your soulmate as a child but you had been wrong.

Pairing: Park Jinyoung x reader (ft Im Jaebum)

Genre: soulmate au / university au

Trope: enemies to lovers

Warnings: none

A/N: Well, he’s done it again. This time it was intentional though! For the longest moment during the voting period, it was a battle royale between the JJP boys and Jinyoung just cinched it in the last day. So I decided to add in Jaebum to help bring an obstacle to this storyline. Originally, like most of my Jinyoung stories, the plan was much simpler than this. Of course, you throw in a supercharged Park Jinyoung who hasn’t had a story written for him in over a month and a soulmate au on top and well, this is a bit of a lengthy piece than what I had hoped for!

I also was a little concerned about writing another soulmate au with Jinyoung after Destined, but this world is far different than the one in my first soulmate attempt, so hopefully it won’t feel like something you’ve read before.

Word count: 5869

You were certain you had known who your soulmate was for your entire life.

Im Jaebum had been your first friend as a child and when you touched for the first time, the gasp that left you both had your parents rejoicing.

Just like that, you had met your destined partner.

With that title between you and Jaebum established, you continued your childhood at each other’s sides and moved easily into teenage years where exploration further enhanced your connection. It was an effortless relationship, with every touch, kiss or stare, you each felt cherished, overwhelmed, connected.

And that was why when you both got into different universities as young adults, neither of you were phased about the separation.

Of course, you voiced how hard it would be living so far apart when you were used to being only five minutes away from each other. But you had prepared for the lack of physical stimulation from Jaebum, with scheduled video chats and using other technological advances to make the distance work.

On a deeper level though, you trusted your connection.

Nothing had disturbed it yet. And you had believed nothing ever could. Your life was set. After university, you would marry Jaebum, move in together, have a couple of kids and live out your predestined lives together. The guesswork had been completely taken out of your hands.

So why was your life in chaos ever since you met Park Jinyoung?

At first, you were hopeful that seeing him in all your classes would help you settle into tertiary life with a common link. Perhaps, that was your first mistake. It wasn’t as if Jinyoung was unfriendly either, he had a similar thought process as you, taking a seat next to you in all your shared classes for the first week of your semester.

And that was when it all began. You hadn’t ever experienced being irked by someone as much as you were by him. Jinyoung was just as smart as you, rivalling you in answers and provoking endless debate. You could have dealt with this if he wasn’t so egotistical in his approach whenever he beat you, his smug smile causing you to seethe instantly. You were no longer comrades taking the same papers, yet he refused to let up about sitting next to you.

Jinyoung had figured out your buttons early on, purposely winding you up at any chance he got. And when he wasn’t focused on annoying you, it gave you too much time to sit and anticipate his next move. Some days, he would leave you alone entirely, aware that he still had your full attention. It was those days where you realised that every little action he made could bother you. His breathing, the way his hand would run through his hair, his laughter, everything was capable of spiralling you into a state.

You tried to separate from him, of course. Once you established that he was a major distraction to your degree, you took active steps to avoid him. It wasn’t easy, given every day was full of hours spent in the same lecture halls, tutorial classes and library spaces, but you made a solid effort to ignore his existence as best as you could.

Yet, this bothered him greatly.

“Why aren’t we sitting in our normal row today, Y/N?” he asked as he sat down beside you, blinking all too innocently for someone who could read your emotions well. The ghost of a smirk was tugging at the corners of his lips and you rolled your eyes, reaching to pick up your supplies to move seats. Jinyoung’s hand came down on yours to stop you and you gaped at him incredulously. He merely pouted. “I’m offended.”

“I sat here to actually get some work done.”

Jinyoung nodded. “What’s holding you back from doing so?”

A thousand curse words and snappy statements flooded your mind in response; instead, you smiled forcibly at him. “Surely, you could befriend someone else.”

“I have friends,” he agreed casually, shrugging a little as if having a vast amount of friendships was normal for everyone. Jinyoung then stared at you, eyes alive with amusement. “But none of them react as well as you do to me.”

“Honestly!” you breathed and a couple of groups around you both glanced in your direction. Feeling your cheeks redden as Jinyoung positively glowed from your outburst, you slumped back down into your chair, resolute on ignoring him for the next fifty minutes.

Jinyoung was having none of that.

He bounced his leg consistently until you shot him a warning look and then he started with his little sighs, each one sounding louder in your ears than the last. You reached to pinch his arm in protest and he gaped at your assault, acting as if you had gravely injured him. He decided instead of moving away from you that he would shift even closer on his seat, pressing right into your side.

You threw your pen down in defeat. It was impossible to get anything done with him playing dirty like this.

When class ended, you spun to face him, Jinyoung now smiling triumphantly at you. “Yes, Y/N?”

“I’m done with you.”

“Are you really?”

You nodded firmly. “Why can’t you leave me alone?!”

“Now where’s the fun in that?” he asked, standing up and slinging his bag over his shoulder before leaning down into your face. “It’s not my fault you’re incredibly easy to make this flustered.”

“Flustered?!” you repeated an octave higher, shaking your head. “I am not flustered!”

“Really? Then how come your cheeks are so pink, hm?” Jinyoung reached out to poke one before a soft chuckle left him. “The colour suits you.”

“Park Jinyoung, you are positively the most annoying human to ever exist!”

He grinned, stepping away from you into the aisle of the emptying lecture hall. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

Over the next few weeks, you suffered at the hands of his insistent behaviour. You grew increasingly frustrated, wondering why he was being like this with you.

You regretted the day you had openly reached out to befriend him.

“And so today, he overheard me telling my friend Nora that I planned on having sushi for lunch and when I went to the cafeteria and fell in line behind him, he purposely took the last tray of sushi when he never eats it. He always has one of the sandwich packs so he can study at the same time as he eats!”

“Maybe he was feeling like sushi today?” Jaebum offered over your video chat but you shook your head immediately.

“No, he did it to spite me.”

“I’m sure you’re reading into this too much, Y/N. The guy probably doesn’t have anything to bother himself over you about. Maybe he’s just messing around with you because you are easy to rile up.”

“You too?!” you cried and Jaebum chuckled. “No, I’m not easy game! And even if I were, I’ve asked him to leave me alone, so shouldn’t he?”

“Well, what have you exactly said to him?” Jaebum became thoughtful for a moment. “You have told him you’ve met your soulmate already, right?”

“No,” you answered, wondering why it was needed to do so. You didn’t view Jinyoung in a romantic light in the slightest. Even considering it for a mere second made you shudder. “I don’t share my personal life with him.”

“Maybe he likes you.”

You smirked, readjusting your laptop. “Just because to you I’m irresistible, doesn’t mean everyone thinks the same way. Jinyoung is just annoying me because he is an asshole.”

“Don’t you remember when Jackson wouldn’t leave Glynnis alone in middle school? He annoyed her until she screamed at him in front of everyone in class.”

You thought back to the time, smiling lightly. “He blurted out he was in love with her and made her cry from embarrassment.”

“Jinyoung could be doing the same thing.”

Trying to compare your situation with the juvenile one of your past, you shook your head. “He’s an adult now Jae, surely he would know there are better ways to approach someone if he felt that way.”

“You never know. If you state it to him that I exist, he might stop.”

“Maybe,” you replied, still in thought. And then you glanced back at the video representation of your boyfriend and pouted. “Doesn’t any of this bother you?”

“No, why should it? You’re capable of solving this issue yourself and I’m not threatened if he does like you. I know you only have eyes for me.”

You grinned, nodding happily. “Of course, you’re my forever.”

Deciding to put Jaebum’s advice into action, you attempted to throw it out that you were in a relationship with your soulmate more than once but it never quite eventuated. Either Jinyoung would steer the conversation away or you would be disrupted by something around you. At night, you would consider new options on how to tell him, chiding yourself for holding back from doing so when you could have just pushed forth. Once he knew you were in a relationship, hopefully, he would step back and give you some space.

It was three weeks later when you both had hired a study room to escape the noise of the main library floor to get some actual work done that you finally announced it. You were both silent for most of the first hour, and for once, Jinyoung was more involved in preparing for your upcoming exams instead of harassing you. It was a perfect opportunity and yet you stalled for twenty minutes, trying to word it right within your head.

Jinyoung sighed heavily. “What is it?”

“Do you believe in soulmates?” you wondered and he didn’t look up from his laptop, his tapping on the keys persistent.

“Doesn’t everyone?”

“Have you met yours?” you continued and finally his hands slowed down, now hovering over the keys without any direction to keep moving. Jinyoung blinked slowly and you leaned over the table unconsciously. “Whether through dreams or in person?”

Whilst you hadn’t dreamt of Jaebum, you had always believed you never needed to since you met him at an early age. Most other people dreamed of who they were destined to before they met them and suddenly you were curious if Jinyoung had or not. Maybe you could help him find his soulmate so he could leave you alone.

When he looked up at you, his eyes were darker, swirling with several emotions. You were taken aback, jumping and hitting into the back of your seat in the process. “What if I have?”

“You have?!” you asked, eyes widening. “Really?!”

“Does it matter if I have or not?” He went back to typing, albeit at a slower rate.

“Well, not to me it doesn’t I guess.” You weren’t sure why his vague answer troubled you so much. You almost didn’t say the next part in your thought process, and when you did, it came out weaker than you intended. “I have.”

Jinyoung tilted his head but didn’t otherwise respond. It irked you. “Did you hear me?”

“You have what?”

“I know who my soulmate is,” you told him and Jinyoung glanced back up you, his eyes now hesitant. You searched his vulnerable expression for a moment, blinking rapidly when you felt your heart thumping in your chest harder. “I uh, I’ve known my soulmate since I was a child. We don’t go to school together but we’re very much a couple.”

No response.

You watched Jinyoung until your cheeks were burning with embarrassment, wondering why you had even listened to Jaebum in the first place. Jinyoung hadn’t reacted how you expected him to and you felt increasingly uncomfortable.

Just when you thought he was going to ignore you entirely, his head snapped up, a smile that you had never seen before now greeting you. You didn’t have enough time to examine it as his next words distracted you. “I didn’t know we were that close to share personal details like that, Y/N.”

“Oh, well uh-”

Jinyoung scraped back his chair, still smiling yet the force of shutting his laptop conflicted the cheerful gesture exhibiting on his lips. “I’m done studying today, you can have the rest of the time to yourself.”

You watched him leave and it hit you then, the fakeness of his response. His eyes had said otherwise.

He very much so cared.

Jinyoung was bitter from your announcement. And instead of giving you immediate relief, his reaction only troubled you further.

Why did you feel like you had broken him?

You snapped up with a jolt, breathing heavily as you attempted to shake away the dream. You had found yourself standing outside the same unfamiliar home you always dreamed of, seeing the back profile of a man who you had never been able to distinguish. Desperation overwhelmed you still; just as much as you wished to reach out for him in your dreams, now back within reality, you craved to know who this man was. For some time, you had been convinced it was Jaebum with how much you felt a need to be around the mysterious person. You did eventually realise his figure was different than your boyfriend’s and it puzzled you that you wouldn’t ever dream of anything but this one person.

Everyone believed dreams were the gateway to your past life’s connection to your soulmate, so it always bothered you when Jaebum wouldn’t turn around and face you within this alternate reality.

Reaching out for your bottle of water on your nightstand, you unscrewed the lid and gulped down a couple of mouthfuls, your eyes still searching the darkness surrounding you for clues. You knew the dream world wouldn’t be waiting behind your eyelids again, no matter how much you would try to force yourself back to that house, to that view; it was never in your control.

You were comfortable with knowing your destiny wasn’t fully within your hands, but you also required clarity in your life. Whenever the path looked unclear, you would dream of this other lifetime, never finding out anything further than what was shown to you.

And ever since you had told Jinyoung about Jaebum, the dream had reoccurred every night for the past twelve days.

Which was the same amount of time that Jinyoung had disappeared from your world.

You had rejoiced initially. The one thing you had always hoped for was just this, freedom from his teasing, space from his close proximity and yet you didn’t appreciate this feeling at all. Your eyes sought him out across the room longingly some days, watching his back view often. It felt too familiar to you, something you had seen so often within another world.

Tonight you were slowly starting to entertain something conflicting.

Why would it be Jinyoung in your dreams? He had no place in there and you laughed incredulously, as if the sound could dislodge your disillusioned thought process. What would your past self have to do with Jinyoung? Jaebum was your soulmate. You had the feelings, the connection, everything you were meant to. With Jinyoung, you had merely frustration. You had touched him before and there had been no sudden revelation of feelings to overwhelm you with.

Before you placed too much weight in it, you picked up your phone, letting it ring until a sleep-filled voice mumbled in answer. “Hello?”

“You dream of me, right?” you pleaded, chewing on your lip in anxious anticipation.

“Y/N it’s four in the morning, why are you calling me about dreams?”

“Just answer it. I’m in your dreams right?”

Jaebum paused, evidently wiping the sleep away from his face with the sigh that sounded into the receiver. He didn’t answer right away, and you blinked back your emotions. Why was it so hard to respond? If you weren’t dreaming of Jaebum, you would feel at ease knowing he dreamt of you instead. His silence was confirming suspicions that had been growing underneath your relationship for some time.

“You don’t?” you whispered and Jaebum groaned.

“Y/N, why are you getting hung up on dreams?” he wondered but even Jaebum knew that dreams meant something to one’s soul. The lifeline of your past had brought you to this point.

You existed and so did your past. It was an intertwining bond of past and present that shaped your destiny. Being ‘hung up’ over dreams was kind of expected.

“You really don’t?”

Jaebum sighed again. “I’ve never dreamt. Not once.”

The very next day, you walked across the lecture hall to where Jinyoung sat, his gaze widening when it connected with yours before he looked away to his textbook. When you didn’t move on, he let out a heavy breath, glancing back at you. “Can I help you with anything?”

Was he always this cold towards you? It made you blink rapidly whilst your chest panged with heartache, as if he had just attacked you physically. Breathing felt difficult and you placed your hands down on the top of the desk for support and to hopefully break free from the pain.

“I dream of you.”

Such a simple sentence to blurt out but the reaction from Jinyoung was instant. He looked as if all the air had been sucked out of him, his dark eyes unblinking as they bored back at you. At first, you saw fear. The hope that swirled within his panic. The multitude of emotions reached out for you one after the other, overwhelming you until you could no longer take it and you turned away, departing the class before it began.

For the rest of the day, you avoided the world. You hid in your dorm room, trying to decipher all that had happened in that moment. You connected it to the conversation you held with Jinyoung in the study room that day, linking the reactions as one and the same. You had been right; it bothered him greatly when you mentioned having a soulmate already. Your proclamation this morning only convinced you further that Jinyoung’s attention on you had more reason than that of a fellow student.

Did he dream of you as well? Of that quaint house you had never entered? Was it a home he had once lived in? You were riddled with questions, yet you ignored every message you received on your phone as well. You knew it was him. The incessant buzzing reminded you of his constant appearance at your side this year and eventually, you silenced your phone, throwing it down on your nightstand and yanked your covers over your head.

At some point, you fell asleep.

The house stood before you yet again, though this time, you saw him. Not within the house, no, you were there instead. Why had the angle changed? It was you who had the home, the fence behind you keeping Jinyoung out. He seemed so far away yet you could make out that gaze all too well. He was hurting and you couldn’t fathom why.

And then you heard someone calling for you, or at least, it felt as if it were a name you once went by. You turned to see Jaebum standing before you, pulling you within the home and shutting Jinyoung out behind the door.

When you sat up from this dream, you were breathing heavily, the tears streaming from your eyes effortlessly. You should have rejoiced, you had finally dreamed of Jaebum. Yet you felt a loss like no other. Even when your grandmother had passed away when you were a teenager, it hadn’t hurt this bad. You wanted to close your eyes again, to go back to the door and open it. You needed to see Jinyoung again. The gaze he held before Jaebum pulled you inside was haunting you now that you were awake. His pain felt like your own.

Somehow, you noticed the sudden glow in your room despite your eyes seeing a different world still. Blinking, you turned to pick up your phone, unlocking the device and reading the latest message from Jinyoung with a tremble.

I dream of you too.

Sitting across from Jinyoung the next day felt awkward. You gripped onto the burning hot mug within your hands and yet it was all you could think to do.

That and reach out for him. Strangely, all you had wanted since meeting up with him at the campus coffee house was just that. Part of it was juvenile. You wanted to see if you felt something this time touching him. But more so, you craved a comfort from him that you never expected to desire.

So you held the mug tightly, ignoring the warnings your fingers were sending to your brain about the heat and stared back at the dark haired man before you.

Silence had sat between you both for a good ten minutes before Jinyoung finally spoke up. “Since when?”

“When what?”

“Are you sure it’s me?”

You stared at him then, properly this time. There was no humour, not a playful smile in sight. Instead, he was scared. You knew you were as well, but noticing the emotion in his eyes made you wish to remove it. And that only frightened you further.

Blinking away your thoughts, you mumbled, “For as long as I can remember. And it’s you, I saw your front view for the first time last night.”

That dream continued to repeat over and over until the morning finally arrived, your mind and soul fatigued from such a constant workout. You noted the lack of quality of sleep within Jinyoung’s gaze too and it made you curious.

“When did you start dreaming of me?”

He shared a wistful smile. “When I was eight.”

“You remember a distinct age?”

“Well, of course,” he replied with a grin, easing you somewhat. “When I told my Mum I dreamed of some weird woman, she freaked out and made me tell her every detail. Then she explained to me what the dream meant.”

“What did she say?” you wondered, leaning forward, encouraging him to share more. Jinyoung’s ears flamed pink and you smirked. “What?!”

“She told me one day I would meet you and to record every dream I’ve had because you were my past and eventually would be my present and future.”

You slumped back in your chair immediately, cursing yourself for being eager. You willed your heart to slow down.

Finally, you found the courage to talk. “I have a soulmate, though.”

“Doesn’t everyone,” Jinyoung murmured, taking a sip of his coffee. He sighed softly. “My soulmate is in love with another man. History is repeating, huh?”

You glanced up then, eyebrows knitted together. “What?”

“Have you dreamed of much?” Jinyoung asked, posing himself within the chair, exuding confidence that only confirmed what you had assumed on your way here. Jinyoung had dreamt of you a great deal. And whilst you had as well of him, it had always been the same angle. What had he seen that you hadn’t? You stared at him for a moment, jealous that his connection with his dreams seemed stronger.

He smirked. “Unlike you, I’ve had years to wait for this opportunity. You weren’t even looking for me, so why would you dream in-depth?”

“How do you know what I have and haven’t dreamt of?”

“You face gave you away,” he admitted with a chuckle and you pouted at his teasing. It was nice though, to see him like that again and your childish reactions to it.

It didn’t last long, Jinyoung’s expression faltered, much like his mood. He still couldn’t slip back to before.

Back to when he thought you were his this time around.

You groaned with how confusing this all was. “What am I like in your dreams?”

“Someone who I missed the opportunity with in another life. We didn’t cross paths until it was too late. I chose to let you remain with the man you had married.”

Wait… married? Your mouth fell ajar as you tried to keep up to speed.

“My mother urged me to not let you slip away this time. If soulmates miss their opportunity in one lifetime, it can lead to complications in another. If they miss twice, they may never meet again in the future. At least, that’s what is written whenever I researched it.”

Of course, Park Jinyoung and sought out the knowledge of the phenomena unlike you.

Not that you had believed you had a reason to.

And what made you think you did now? Because you dreamed of him? Just because that happened didn’t mean your life had to change. You had been happy with Jaebum. You had always believed it was him. He was familiar, like a home.

You thought back to how he pulled you within the house in your dreams and you grabbed at your throbbing head. “It’s too much.”

“Is it?”

You glanced up then, the vulnerable way Jinyoung was staring at you catching your breath in your chest. He blinked back his own emotions, trying to smile. “Too much is dreaming of never being the chosen one. Too much is hearing from your own mouth that you’d known your soulmate since a child. I don’t know, Y/N. Was I truly destined to suffer so much over and over?”

Your world blurred then as the tears welled within your eyes. Had he really suffered that much? Since figuring it all out, the last two days had been a whirlwind of emotions you had never anticipated to experience.

Especially not with him.

For the first time, you doubted who Jaebum was to you. You even doubted who you were.

You didn’t want anyone to suffer. And yet, it seemed inevitable.

Exams were done with, and semester break had arrived. Heading home signalled a crossroads within your life. You would leave Jinyoung back in your schooling world and immerse yourself in the one you had once felt confident within.

You were nervous to see Jaebum, however.

Things had been somewhat strained since your phone call that night, with you now knowing that your soul had two men within its past journey and neither was a right or wrong. Jaebum hadn’t pressed the matter either, which upset you more than you had let on to him. You had hoped he could break you out of the funk you were in over Jinyoung. That he could say something to make you forget about all the dreams, the newfound feelings, the continued battle within you to spend more time with someone who wasn’t your boyfriend. At one point, you had considered Jinyoung an enemy! Now you considered too many things about him.

The solace you craved from being home again was short-lived. You met with friends, you laughed with family and you reminisced of the old times.

With Jaebum especially.

Sitting across from him in your family home felt strange now. At first, you had bounded up to his arrival at the door, smiling when you saw him and wrapped your arms around him as he hugged you back. You had hoped that hug would remove any niggling insecurities. It hadn’t, if anything, his embrace felt different. Not cold, because you could never imagine Jaebum to be that way with you. Yet there was no warmth like there once was.

The barrier between you was evident.

After catching up on school stuff, your conversation fell short, neither of you immediately addressing the elephant within the room until the silence became unbearable. Why was it hard to connect with him now?

“Are you still dreaming?” he finally asked, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Mm.”

“Have you seen who the man is in person at all?” Glancing up, you were surprised that Jaebum had asked the question at all. He was watching you intently, a sad smile crossing his lips. “You have, huh.”

One time, you had told Jaebum about your dream. Hoping that he had seen it himself and could shed light on what it meant. Now and then he would ask you about it, and in the past, you had assured him that you were none the wiser.

Had Jaebum known you weren’t his soulmate all this time?

“Is it him?”

“Who?”

“The guy who bothered you, is it him?” Jaebum continued and you nodded once, only listening to the sigh that left him as you were too ashamed to look up now. Even though you hadn’t done a thing, you felt as if you had cheated with Jinyoung. It was a precarious feeling, and you didn’t know what to do with yourself.

Jaebum didn’t respond for a while. You couldn’t speak of your thoughts either. Nothing made sense, and clarity remained out of reach.

And then he stood up. He smiled down at you, chuckled even. “I always wondered why I didn’t dream of you. Now I know why.”

“I wish it was you.”

“No, you should wish for your real soulmate.”

You shrugged. “I’m kind of over the whole concept, to be honest.”

“And we thought our teenage years were hard, huh?” he mentioned with a grin and you rolled your eyes, a small smile tugging at the corners of your mouth all the same momentarily.

“What do we do, Jaebum?”

He reached out to rub the top of your arms, still smiling down at you. “Are you sure of him?”

“How can I be sure of anything? I’m with you.”

“Maybe you need to step back from me and find out who he is. I’ll always be in your life, perhaps just not as how we originally thought. Who knows, maybe I’ll start dreaming now too.”

And just like that, your first love had given you the sacrifice you would need to figure everything out.

When you returned to your dorm after your break, a package was waiting for you. Once settled in from your journey, you reached to open it, finding a plain notebook inside. There was no note from the sender, and you frowned before placing it down on your desk and taking a shower. When you returned, the puzzle of the book grappled at you until you flipped to the first page.

The handwriting was legible but definitely youthful. What it lacked in style was made up in the content. It felt as if you were reading some fantastical storyline about soulmates for the next several pages. You felt the years go by as the writing style changed, the neatness improving, and losing that story-telling charm. Some pages only had a few words on them. Others were longer, more time spent on the feelings experienced rather than the actual happenings.

By the time you reached the last entry in the journal, you felt as if you had ridden a rollercoaster and as you climbed off, you found you knew more about yourself through the eyes of someone else than you had ever expected to.

It made you leap up from your chair, hurriedly place on some extra clothing, and then head out into the brisk evening. You had an idea of where Jinyoung lived, but not the exact address and yet this didn’t deter you from making your way over there at all. After bumping into a fellow classmate, you found out the information you needed and went into a building, taking a few deep breaths outside of the door before you knocked on it.

When it opened, Jinyoung stared at you quietly, not inviting you in, nor greeting you at all. It made your cheeks flush with embarrassment, unsure now as to why you were standing here. The item you held tightly to your chest reminded you of your rushed emotions and you held it out towards him feebly. “I read your journal.”

Jinyoung still didn’t respond, eyes hard, searching yours for something.

You smiled weakly and rocked on your heels, thrusting it out towards him further. “Thank you for letting me read it.”

“Really? That’s all?” he wondered and you blinked, frowning slightly. “You’re thanking me for showing you the most personal thing in my life?”

“Well, I … I mean… can I come in?”

You glanced both ways down the hallway, feeling exposed. Jinyoung was still for a moment and then scoffed. “Do you really want to?”

You knew the added implication despite his response. That was his way of protecting his feelings, it always had been. Despite this, he was searching your eyes for a sign that he could let some of them show. Hope infiltrated his stare once more. You smiled and that was enough for him to grab a hold of you, pulling you inside his room.

And once the door was shut, he pressed you against it.

The swiftness of this new position winded you, though breathing became all too difficult to comprehend once Jinyoung’s lips met yours. They merely pressed into yours, connecting yet unmoving. Even with just the weight of his mouth on yours, a fire burned within you, unlike anything you had felt before. Every inch of your body felt as if it was alive, the colours around you both now vivid, blinding. His kiss began to build languidly, and within that moment, your eyes fluttered shut, still feeling, seeing and hearing too much. Stars rained down behind your eyes, and the hairs stood up upon your skin. You could hear his equally staggered breath, the hot air blowing out from his nose onto your cheek. The thumping of your own heart rivalled by his own and when you finally pulled away to catch your breath, your hands were now threaded through the ends of his silky hair, anchored there.

Jinyoung slowly smiled. “I can actually do this with you, right?”

“I wouldn’t have come to you if I couldn’t do this with a clear conscience.”

Somehow, his smile grew. And then you were tasting him again.

You didn’t rush. But as the weeks went by, you realised that the past that you had once lived, both in this lifetime and beyond that was definitely not your future.

It eased you when Jaebum messaged you telling you he had dreamed of someone as well. It was as if this whole puzzle had pieces that needed to be put in place before the next one could be discovered and placed down as well.

And there was still a whole lot of pieces to go. After all, you had so much to discover about Jinyoung. You hadn’t grown up with him, and over the months of getting to know him so far, well, you had kind of disliked him.

Perhaps your dislike towards him was because you couldn’t figure out why he bothered you so much. And even though you now had a reason behind his place in your life, he still was the same guy you had sworn was sent to drive you insane. Which Jinyoung had innate skill at doing, whether it was by getting your attention during class, or taking your breath away in endless kisses, he was always there right at your side.

And you knew in this lifetime, he always would be.

_________________

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creativejourneysbct · 4 years

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Studio 1 Week 2/3 First Project: Hacking a Board Game - SLAP ATTACK

At the end of our week 2 studio session, we were assigned the task of "hacking" a board game, using some of the skills we had learned that day, to make it more interactive.

First, my group and I considered different board games that we would use as a template to start with. We settled on using an alphabet bingo board. It appeared simple enough; a circular board with a pointer that could be spun to randomly select a part of the board.

We then started brainstorming possible ways in which we could alter the game to make it more interactive. We agreed that it would be beneficial to create our own interface to replace the alphabet bingo one, as this would allow us more freedom to create our own rules and ultimately come up with our own game. So, we started sketching ideas on what our new board interface would look like.

This involved us thinking critically about the overall gameplay and having to come up with some sort of a finalized idea of what the end product would be.

After several iterations, we landed on a plan to create a game where the spinner is spun by a player then, depending on where it landed, all the players would have to do an action IF the lights on the board are turned on. This way the lights are adding an extra element of surprise, as not only is it impossible to predict what part of the board the spinner will land on (and therefore what action the player may have to do), but also whether or not that action would even have to be carried out at all, depending on the light's status.

It then came time to think about what skills from the day we would use to achieve our new gameplay and therefore make the game more interactive.

It was clear that papertronics would be necessary to create the circuit beneath the board that would allow for the lights to turn on when the spinner touches certain areas of the board.

So, we got to work using the copper tape to create a small test circuit as a proof of concept before moving onto anything larger. Since the goal was to have a few lights around the board light up when powered by a single battery, we tested this out by making a smaller, simpler version of the final product, using copper tape, two LEDs, and a battery to make the circuit pictured below.

As can be seen, one of the LEDs didn't seem to work. But, after some more testing, we discovered that the LED was just faulty, and it did work when being pressed. Thus, the concept of a single battery powering more than one LED had been "proven"!

We then took it a step further by making a circuit using the copper tape that went from one side of a sheet of paper (emulating the board) that housed the battery, to the other side of the piece of paper, where the spinner was. We stuck copper tape to the underside of the spinner. This allowed it to effectively close the circuit when passing along the copper tape area on the board, and therefore light up the LEDs.

While the pointer still had to be pressed down for the circuit to be complete and light up the LEDs, it was still enough to prove that the circuit could go from one side of the surface to the other, which is exactly what we needed for the final product.

We then got to work on our first iteration of the board's surface.

Since we didn't have a compass or any other tools that could be used to make a perfect circle, I used a technique I knew from high school art to draw a large circle that was relatively the same size as the original Alphabet Bingo circle to go on top of it.

We cut out the white circle, stuck four colored sheets of paper over it in the alignment we wanted for the board game design, and used it to cut a perfect (ish) circle around the four colored sheets of paper.

We now had a rough prototype of the game we wanted to create. Since the main circuitry hadn't been created yet, we used some random objects to simulate the areas of the board that would activate the LEDs should the spinner land there. We then playtested the game, to see whether or not it was even enjoyable. We wound up quite enjoying the competitive nature of having to react fastest or else face elimination. It was a simple concept, but one that we believed would work and prove engaging for players.

Next, we started implementing the full-sized circuit. We initially attempted to only use one battery for all four LEDs but this proved to be too complex, so we started over and made a new circuit that used two batteries with each battery responsible for only 2 LEDs.

From the top side, we can see that the spinner still had to be pushed down to activate the LED. This was quite a substantial concern for the project, as the desired effect was supposed to be effortlessly spinning the spinner and having it light up the LED automatically.

Determined to persevere anyway, Matt and I split up from the group to work on designing a proper layout for our board game. As photoshop wasn't working on either of our laptops, we used a word processor to create a simple but aesthetically pleasing board that we then printed out in a3. We wanted to make sure the font used was legible and that the board wasn't too cluttered. One of the main design principles we tried to focus on was maximizing the intuitiveness of the game so that anyone could have an idea of how to play it with little to no instruction. We also added simple hand gesture illustrations as iconography next to the corresponding action word to further guide the user's understanding.

With the new board face printed out, we used it when coming up with ways of solving the issue of the light not automatically lighting up.

We went through a range of different methods, such as using a motor and a wheel to reduce the friction and provide a better spin.

We finally settled on simplifying the design so that we would only use one LED situated on the top of the spinner. This worked on occasion but still wasn't lighting up consistently enough.

With the circuitry proving to be much more problematic than expected, another member of the group and I got to work on creating a clear set of rules for the game, which was still a very important part of the game design. At the end of the day, we still wanted to have a finished game that our classmates could play, even if our light-up spinner wasn't operational. This also involved us coming up with a name for the game. Out of thin air, I pulled out the words "SLAP ATTACK" and since no one else had anything better, this was the name that stuck. In fairness though, the name grew on us and accurately reflected the fast-paced nature of the gameplay.

I enjoyed the design aspect of creating the rules quite a bit. We tried to keep it in theme with the board, using the same colors, icons, and fonts to maintain a cohesive aesthetic and design language.

As the circuitry didn't look like it would be operational in time for the showcase, we decide to create a "concept" edition that would act as a model of what we had intended for the board game. It was to be our clean, "best-case scenario" version.

We printed out another copy of the board game design and glued it to some wood to create a firm, stable base. We then drilled a hole through it to make room for the spinner.

Fortunately, this allowed enough room for the rules to go on the side, so we glued them down next to the main circle. I will say, design-wise, I was very pleased with the result we got. The overall look of the board and rules matched in a nice, simple colorful manner and looked very clean.

While we could still get the lights to turn on on the other board, it still required us to press down on the spinner, which defeated the purpose of the game. Or it would light up, but not always, and for the game to work as intended it would need to light up every time it went over a copper tape part of the board.

It was difficult to accept but we were unable to achieve the concept we had envisioned. As it turns out, using a spinner was not as simple as we thought it would be. When seeking help we were advised to use a "slip ring". At the time it was too late in the game to change direction, but next time that's definitely something we can look into.

Finally, for the showcase, we added some blue, green, red, and yellow chips (the same color scheme as the board game itself) to the mix to act as physical representations of the lives of players. Even if it wasn't related to circuitry or the makey makey, the tactile chips added weight to the concept of losing a life every time a player had to give one away after losing a round.

Overall, even though we couldn't implement the interactive elements we wanted to, the classmates who tried our game seemed to really enjoy the fast-paced, competitive nature of the game as our table was almost always occupied with players. So, if nothing else, we were still able to develop a concept that was engaging for players, so I'm happy about that. Plus, our circuit still technically worked, it just needed to be pressed down which didn't work as intended for the board game.

(PS - I wanted to add more photos towards the end but hit the Tumblr photos limit so this should hopefully suffice. Just another thing to keep in mind when making these posts going forward.)

Update - After writing this long, almost step-by-step recount of the creation process, I have been introduced to the "Gibbs Reflective Cycle" in our Intro to Creative Technologies Lecture so I think I'd be remiss to not include it at the end of this.

While I could technically go back and reduce everything I've written to a paragraph long "description of what happened, I have chosen to keep it for 2 reasons; the first is that it took me a great deal of time and effort to make so I simply don't want to delete it all. But secondly and most importantly, even if it's not the best, most effective reflective blog post, I see these posts as a working, evolving skill that I want to be able to look back on and see how much I've changed and improved. So yes, I'm keeping it if only for the fact that It's a piece of history on how I reflected on my first creative project.

So, without further ado, here are my more structured, Gibbs Reflective Cycle paragraphs.

Reflecton

Description

This has been covered in depth in the prior paragraphs but we effectively were tasked with "hacking" a board game to make it more interactive using the skills we had learned in class. This resulted in two final board games being made by my group - one that used the circuitry to allow a spinner to make lights on the board turn on but wouldn't work consistently enough, and another cleaner version that functioned as a board game but didn't incorporate all the electrical elements.

Feeling

During the process of creating this board game, I felt a variety of emotions. When coming up with ideas for the game, I felt a sense of creative burnout. This is a feeling I'm relatively unfamiliar with. In most academic cases coming up with a solution involves further readings and eventually, the solution will become apparent. When coming up with an original boardgame idea, however, I was certainly put out of my comfort zone.

Another part that put me out of my comfort zone was working in the workshop, using the drills, saws, hot glue gun. All of these tools are relatively simple but given my highly limited experience working in this kind of environment, I quickly realized that I had a lot to learn.

All that said, however, I felt a sense of joy when even though we couldn't implement the desired electrical element when the board game concept that we had created actually turned out to be engaging.

I also felt positive about collaborating with my group and using our different skillsets to the advantage of the project. I like designing things on the computer, so I dealt more with the creating of the board and rule sheet designs.

Evaluation.

The positives of the project, as mentioned earlier were the overall coming together and teamwork. The biggest positive would have to be the final game concept that we envisioned actually proving engaging to players.

The negatives, as mentioned, is the obvious one of our main electrical component not working as desired. But that's all a part of this early creative process. Learning to fail. And we definitely learned from it, so it was a valuable failure.

Analysis

I suppose the biggest lesson to learn from this is to identify the "marshmallow" at an early stage. As learned in the marshmallow challenge, it's essential to identify the unknown aspect of the project early on, as if left until later it can be too late and render the project incomplete. In this case, the spinner was the unknown and we left it until too late to ask for help Its simple appearance blinded us to the fact that we were unequipped with the knowledge to achieve our desired outcome with such a new concept. '

Conclusion

As mentioned, getting help for unknown elements in the early stages definitely would've helped improve our final result. We found out about the slip ring too late but had we gone down that route in the beginning it probably would've resulted in a working, functional boardgame.

Regardless, at the end of the day, we still enhanced our understanding of circuits, got creative with game dynamics and design, and created something that was enjoyed by our classmates. And, most importantly, learned how to improve on this next time.

Action Plan

Next time we'll be sure to identify the Marshmellow sooner and get the required support when there's still enough time to implement changes.

All in all, this was still a great introduction to the creative process. We learned a tonne and know how to improve so I'm excited to see what we do next time!

#ctec501

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overshadowedprojects · 5 years

Text

It’s been 15 hours of silliness, thank you guys who attended the streams with us!!

We’ve given away 15 raffle art prizes over the span of these 4 days, 11 cupcake drawings and 4 special commissioned pieces by some of my lovely co-hosts!

It was an absolutely pleasure to hang out with you guys, stay safe and keep the creativity rolling~

===============

Quarantined Art Stream this week! I will be joined by a handful of my close friends from around the world (Europe and North America) and we will co-host shenanigans together! We may not all be available for the full sessions, but will pop in and out as time permits.

https://picarto.tv/OvershadowedProjects

The intention of the streams this week is for fun. Things right now are quite crazy and many of us have been instructed to stay in our homes. Myself in fact, just on Monday (the 16th). We’re going to chat (and be loud!!), art, give away art and have daily mindfulness sessions. Our mental health is just as important as our physical health. **

Tuesday’s stream 12pm - 3pm EST Wednesday Stream 11am - 3pm EST Thursday Stream 11am - 3pm EST Friday Stream 11am - 3pm EST

Times are permitted to change at any point, but I will do my best to give as much notice as possible. If there is an emergency, the stream may end abruptly.

Read below about raffle prizes and further details regarding times and such:

Every hour on the hour (approx, if we are in the middle of a topic I will not interrupt) I will draw a name of a viewer to receive a simple cupcake drawing based on them/their favourite flavours/an original character or fan character/etc! Because of the number of these I will be doing, they will be simpler prizes but I will do my best to make them cute for you. You do not need to be present when your name is drawn, but to have been in the stream at some point prior to the raffle draw.

All days, there will be a 5 minute mindfulness/meditation session at 2pm followed by a raffle for a commission worth $10 from a guest artist (depending on schedules, may be unavailable to co-host the stream that specific day). I will be paying for the commission, just let me know what you would like based on the prize offered and we will coordinate with the artist. The artist will work on and complete the prize when they are available. I do not want to hear about any harassment towards my friends. Myself or the artist in question have the right to deny any requests and cancel your prize at any point if harassment of any type ensues.

The raffle participants will reset every day; However, I will have the winner of the ‘commissioned prize’ from the guest artist to be different. You can win both a cupcake mini prize and a commissioned prize, but not two commissioned prizes. But with multiple participation, you can win more than one cupcake (but not in a single day).

Please leave your TUMBLR user in the chat upon arrival so I can contact you regarding your prize. Example of prize drawings: (Tuesday - Stream starts at 12pm, 1pm cupcake draw, 2pm special draw, 3pm cupcake draw and end of stream.)

Tuesdays’ stream I will be working on a commission myself for a friend. I generally don’t do commissions but rather this was a special request. I know several artists who are also quarantined that, if you are looking to purchase artwork, I can direct you to. Otherwise, I will likely be streaming the cupcakes, or perhaps nothing visually. But microphones will be on, there will be chatting and discussing, lots of fun and shenanigans.

** A skillset I am quite proud of is meal prep/meal planning and making food with limited resources, preparing meals to last relatively long periods of time, etc. I have a background in Culinary and work in a Restaurant; But, I would like to use this knowledge to assist others in this time of need as well. There is a lot of fear of not being able to go to the store, and even when we can sometimes it is chaos with all of the panic buying around us. If I can help ease that stress by even a little, please do not hesitate to talk to me either during the streams or privately!

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toragi · 4 years

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My analysis on Joji's 'Gimme Love,' 'Run,' and 'Sanctuary'

This is going to be a long one folks so prepare yourselves.

Here's my two cents on the supposed lore we've been given.

Theory 1:

In 'Gimme Love,' we're shown scientist Joji--who presents his findings while sharing bits and pieces of his life with us. We're shown his coworkers, his workplace, the frustrations, the technology being built and the potential relationship he builds with someone (as seen through the wedding cake, ring, and picture on his desk). However, the longer the song goes on, we're starting to be shown images of blood. First, a few droplets on the hands, then a few on the face. Eventually, the images of the blood are proceeded by hospitalizations all the while, Joji is climbing the ranks at his job. The last images we get before the transition are bloody hands, which could imply that someone was caught, "red-handed" or that Joji has other people's "blood on their [his] hands," implying something more sinister was at play with the research he was doing.

During the second half of the song, we can see Joji has locked out his crew and boards the rocket by himself. The repetition of the chorus in the song overall, "gimme, gimme love when I'm gone," becomes even more important in this scene. He's planning on leaving, by himself, and he's not having anyone tag along. While he may have flipped off those on the ground, it can be seen as self-sacrificial. He climbed the work ranks but at what cost? At seeing all of his coworkers injured or perish from whatever they were researching? Potentially even seeing the SO injured or dead?

The lyrics could easily mean shower him in love and praise when he's gone or giving love to all who died or suffered throughout the video. It also makes the ending lyric much more impactful--"everyone's looking for someone to hold but I can't let you go," To all those he lost, and even potentially the SO, it's going to be hard for him to let them go. He has no one to anchor him, all those who he cared about were just looking for someone to hold (for arguments sake, presumably, Joji) and now he's haunted by the memory of their suffering, ('I can't let you go,').

As the video ends, we can see a panel that says, "Eject," or "Engage," which can be interpreted as, 'Eject'' --> Run route and 'Engage' --> Sanctuary route.

(I'd like to note that at this point, I've created two separate theories from the proceeding argument laid out above. The first theory speaks of each song as a 'route' whereas the second theory talks about all three songs in connection with one another, one following another).

Sub Theory 1:

'Eject' --> Run

Throughout the video, we see Joji running through what seems like an endless limousine with many people throwing a party. He's constantly trying to get away from them all and wants no part with them. These can be seen as those who congratulated him when he was climbing the ranks in the 'Gimme Love' video. As everything is spiraling, Joji is exhausted and growing tired of it all, wanting to just run away. (The shots where he's seemingly blending into the ground give this insight). Towards the end, he finally breaks free and runs. However, we see him in a spaceship with a robotic voice saying, "Wake up,"

Perhaps it was all a nightmare that he was reliving, which is why the limousine seemed to be endless. The alarm was the only thing that woke him up. The picture of the car he had is reminiscent of simpler times.

Although the lyrics seem to be directed at someone, what if it's a self reflection to the agency or coworkers that he worked with? Of the work that he did and the lives he put at risk? The first verse,

"I fell for your magic/I tasted your skin/And though this is tragic/at least I found the end/I witnessed your madness/you shed light on my sins/And if we share in this sadness, then where have you been?"

Could be a reference to the 'thing' that made everyone suffer/bleed in the Gimme Love video. The success of finding and discovering it but at what cost?

Which then segue ways into the chorus,

"You bathe in your victory/you blew out on my fuse/and if I took on the planet/Will I pay my dues?/your love was a mystery/yeah, my love is a fool/and I travel the country just to get to you"

The lyric, "and if I took on the planet, will I pay my dues?" could mean that he feels awful about what happened. Perhaps if he took it upon himself to venture out into space rather than having his entire crew, he could stop having more people suffer. He was tricked by the discovery, "your love was a mystery," and in chasing it--"yeah, my love is a fool"--he caused others to be hurt.

The chorus could be interpreted to mean that he's stuck with the misery of knowing all that he knows. He knows he fucked up but he doesn't know how to handle any of it so he just decides to 'run.'

'Engage' --> Sanctuary

In Sanctuary, we see a lonely Joji. We do see a villain but as the video goes on, the villain originally turned out to be his friend. It's possible that at one point, Joji gained a new crew. However, still at loss from what happened on Earth, he chooses not to interact with them. This crew member aches for Joji to return to interacting with them but to no avail. He eventually goes on the rampage and turns evil and Joji soon realizes what has happened.

In the chorus, he talks about falling in love and heaven. He says, "If you’ve been waitin' for fallin' in love/Babe, you don’t have to wait on me/'Cause I've been aimin' for Heaven above/But an angel ain't what I need" which could imply to not wait on him for love or a relationship--he's tried and done with that. He's just aiming to get to Heaven and be forgiven hopefully ('but an angel ain't what I need').

Verse 2 and the bridge of the song compliment each other;

"Not anyone, you're the one/More than fun, you're the sanctuary/'Cause what you want is what I want/Sincerity" and "Pull me oh so close/'Cause you never know/Just how long our lives will be," just further reinforce how much he wants to be done with it all. All he seeks is sincerity, clarity, and forgiveness since he doesn't know how long a life can last.

Sub theory 2:

Gimme Love is Joji's life on Earth but after discovering something vile in the workplace as he climbed the ranks, he took it upon himself to venture out into space alone to not have anyone else suffer.

Run is a nightmare that Joji was suffering. We can see him still be alone and without a crew but still longing for the days in where he had the people he cared about around. He wants to run away from all the problems and misery that follow him due to working on his discovery and all of the pain that it caused him. The robotic voice saying, "Wake up," could be a literal wake up call from his nightmare or serve as a reminder to 'wake up,' and to never let himself stray that far out again.

In Sanctuary, he has finally acquired a crew but he's still lonely. He finally managed to get close to someone again but loses yet another person as they become the 'villain.' He fights them off but at what cost? He loses yet again someone that he cared about. However, he know has a whole new cast of crew members that he can rely on and he finally realizes this after dealing with so much misery and grief over losing so many people. He finally accepts his circumstances and decides to move forward, realizing that there's nothing he can do about the past.

Maybe I just read too damn deep into these videos. I could be completely wrong. But it was fun to theorize about.

It could all just be a fever dream. Who knows when it comes to Joji and his music.

#joji #gimme love #sanctuary #run #bruh I spent all day thinking about this shit #88rising #music video #music videos #nectar #joji thank you for keeping us well fed #we appreciate it #george miller #joji miller

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brickroseexchange · 4 years

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How to Start an Event Venue in 5 Steps

1.Do your research

2.Find a location

3.Promote your venue

4.Price competitively

What business is more enjoyable than the gathering industry? The individuals who have opened a function space realize that it's an industry dependent on helping individuals make some great memories, making a perfect encounter, and keeping the stray pieces of the night out of the spotlight. It's hard yet remunerating work.

In case you're an extrovert—anxious to if it's not too much trouble anxious to meet new individuals, anxious to help make the bonds that frequently emerge from sharing great food, beverages, and vibe—and you're keen on utilizing that energy to begin a business, you've gone to the opportune spot. In this guide, we are demonstrating how to begin a function setting.

Regardless of whether you're generally keen on a function space for weddings, parties, or a show lobby for shows, there are sure parts of the business that stay steady.

Katie O'Reilly is the Senior Partner of Business Development at Kenmare Catering and Event Venue, which works the Germania Place area in the core of Chicago's Gold Coast. She says that her business was resulting from her adoration for individuals.

"I originated from a group of lawyers and I simply didn't have any desire to do that," O'Reilly says. "I have an energy for food and individuals that began right off the bat—that was my center. So my point of view when I escaped school was that I needed to toss gatherings and hold functions and meet individuals."

Before she struck out all alone—alongside her significant other—O'Reilly worked for the Art Institute of Chicago as the associate head of exceptional functions, where she was first presented to the way toward tossing parties, dealing with the cooking, and tweaking the historical center's different spaces. That is the place where she mastered all she'd require to prevail in the field.

"This isn't a simple industry," she says. "There's a great deal of grimy work, and you must have the option to do everything, whenever—at functions, things come up, and you must have the option to think and react quickly in light of the fact that you never need the gathering to be anything short of awesome."

With O'Reilly's assistance, we will make you stride by venture through how to begin a function scene. We should get to it.

Do Your Research

Prior to beginning a venture, it is significant you teach yourself on the difficulties and necessities should have been effective. The equivalent is genuine when attempting to decide how to begin a function scene. Examination the practicality of a function scene in your market.

Discover what the nearby necessities are, for example, a permit to sell alcohol. Comprehend the expenses related with dispatching a function space, and make a financial plan. Figure out who your objective market will be. Find out about your rivals. At that point, assembled this data into a strategy.

While doing this examination, consider contacting exchange associations, for example, the National Association for Catering and Events (NACE) or the Wedding International Professionals Organization (WIPA). These associations can furnish you with direction and assets as you make your approach.

Find a location

The subsequent stage in sorting out some way to begin a function scene is to make sure about a quality structure in a decent business area. This is really one of the main strides simultaneously. While you can control everything else about your space—how to redo it, what sort of functions you need to have, what food to cook—your structure and area will be an apparatus of your business.

"Area is gigantic: it generally has any kind of effect," says O'Reilly. "Here on the Gold Coast, there are individuals around us who love food and have the financial plan to manage the cost of it. The area is lovely, individuals like to visit, individuals can get a taxi out of here—it's even a square from the sea shore.

In the Event Venue that you have individuals appear from away, you need them to be in a local where they feel good, recognizable. While there's very a pattern towards that provincial setting these days, as far as we might be concerned, everybody loves what we have—mother loves it, father loves it, grandmother loves it."

O'Reilly found the Germania Place area when her better half wound up taking a shot at an arrangement for the spot, which the couple thought about immature and undersold. They chose to take their long stretches of involvement and abundance of contacts and utilize the setting to dispatch their own business.

"Since a portion of the desk work was at that point in progress for the scene, it just took several months to get all the agreements all together and shut," says O'Reilly. She noticed that this wasn't the commonplace experience: bargains for comparative spaces regularly take longer.

On the off chance that you need assistance buying your function space, you may investigate a business land advance.

Promote your venue

Other "costs" to factor in when attempting to sort out some way to begin a function setting relate less to buying certain things or recruiting a specific number of individuals and more to advancement.

The most ideal approach to advance your business is organizing and engaging with others in the business," says O'Reilly. "You need to continue expanding on yourself and indicating individuals what your identity is and what your aptitudes are—you can't sit in a dim space and anticipate that individuals should appear."

As far as we might be concerned, the subsequent stage is telling individuals about my culinary ability," she says. "I'm beginning an electronic character for myself—Katie O's Food Carnival—in light of the fact that my customers have been requesting it and you need to tune in to that."

Past systems administration face to face and exhibiting your ability on the web, there should likewise be some cash put into the real introduction of your place—tossing gatherings and functions that grandstand your capacities, and why the following large wedding or corporate function ought to be at your scene.

You need to get individuals to eat your item before they consent to pay for it," O'Reilly clarifies.

Always Keep the Food and Conversation Going

The exact opposite thing to remember while working a function setting is that you will probably ensure everybody has a decent encounter. Nonetheless, a decent encounter can fluctuate extraordinarily relying upon the demographic and the idea of the function.

What will be expected of your setting relies upon the functions—weddings are simpler to anticipate, however corporate functions can differ extraordinarily as far as the gave amusement, dignity, and even ensembles for visitors to fit a topic. In any case, Germania Place's menu is one that is extraordinarily broad and adaptable, yet aware of what bodes well.

We're brilliant customers and we know our fixings," says O'Reilly. "You need to watch the patterns and know about irregularity, costs, and where we would pay the extra for the customer to have that thing first class.

You would prefer not to serve a lot of purple cauliflower in January, yet in summer I can give you any shade of cauliflower you'd actually need."

Squandered food is additionally a major subject of discussion for the staff, which sporadically needs to make dishes when they're not sure how much will be burned-through.

We plan things that can spare and be repurposed later, similar to a braised meat that can be re-braised and transformed into an item for the following day," says O'Reilly. "However, this is your night to approach me for anything.

I consider it the "When Harry Met Sally" idea, since individuals are reluctant to be requesting and request what they need—however I am making for you."

#Event Venue #Event Hall

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generaldelusionfox · 4 years

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. Google Analytics Google Analytics is to the online advertiser like air is to the individual. You can't survive without it. In case you're not yet utilizing Google Analytics, I suggest that you start doing as such as quickly as time permits. There is no other information source that gives high caliber and nitty gritty data like Google Analytics. In a Google-overwhelmed period, it's what we need to work with. The majority of different information apparatuses basically piggyback on Google's information utilizing the API. Appraisal you can't disregard Google Analytics. For all intents and purposes all the significant and significant information about site guests, traffic, and so forth. originates from this basic source. More Information Look at a conversation of how Analytics assists with driving high changing over inquiry traffic. Gain proficiency with a couple of Google Analytics reports that can help create natural traffic. 2. Google Search Console In the event that Google Analytics is the air that an online advertiser inhales, at that point Google Search Console (some time ago Webmaster Tools) is the food that the online advertiser eats.

"Webmaster" in the previous name is somewhat of a misnomer. The apparatus is for more than website admins. It's for SEOs. The very focal point of the device has to do with "search" and "improvement." A portion of GSC's best bits of knowledge originates from simply looking at the dashboard. SEOs and advertisers need to stay aware of the dashboard all the time. Google Search Console gives a portion of indistinguishable information from Analytics, however in a less complex and increasingly direct manner. There's less tweaking you can do with the numbers, yet simpler access to them. 3. Uber suggest Uber suggest is an across the board SEO apparatus intended to assist you with dominating the match of SEO. A major piece of SEO achievement is recognizing what you're doing, what your rivals are doing, and how to modify your procedure to exploit openings in the market. Beginning with Uber suggest is as basic as composing a space or catchphrase into the inquiry bar. From here, you increase moment access to a report for your picked space or catchphrase. For this post, I need to concentrate on the catchphrase search abilities of Uber suggest. It's an extraordinary option in contrast to the Google Keyword Planner apparatus, which has lost a portion of its brilliance throughout the years. In the wake of running a quest for your essential watchword, here's the way you can utilize Uber suggest to reveal related catchphrases to remember for your substance. Step #1: Click "Watchword Ideas" Situated in the left sidebar, click "Watchword Ideas" to be taken to a far-reaching report. 4. MozBar

Information is the situation with the MozBar. At the point when you consider it, SEO has a great deal to do with knowing the secret sauce. The MozBar causes you to find the secret sauce initially. The MozBar button sits straight up in your program toolbar — where all the activity is going on. Snap-on the MozBar, and you create a moment report on the site you're visiting. 5. SEO Workers Analysis Tool The Analysis Tool permits you to connect a site URL — any site, regardless of whether it's not yours — and produce a report. SEO Workers doesn't give anything new, yet it assists with sparing a ton of time in the examination. Additionally, it gives foundation data on the information. A portion of the information, similar to the HTTP Headers Check is in the engine stuff that you wouldn't ordinarily think to check for. Here is SEO Worker's one of a kind component. They show you SEO notwithstanding demonstrating you the SEO information that issues. Inside each broke down classification, the report gives an itemized conversation, and frequently a video (ft. Matt Cuts). 6. Woo Rank from the outset, Woo Rank seems, by all accounts, to be simply one more freemium site analyzer. Upon closer, examination, be that as it may, it gives convenient experiences into some not really evident stuff. Woo Rank first shows a "Main concerns segment. Sadly, here's one of the drawbacks of the device. In one way or another, it feels that I have a 404 mistake, come up short on a favicon, and don't have a robots.txt document. These are incorrect. Read more about Group Buy SEO tools. 7. Neil Patel SEO Analyzer I'm accepting that you're now mindful of my free site analyzer. I believe it merits referencing, notwithstanding, as a last free apparatus available to you. One component that I've taken a stab at is the serious investigation. Some portion of the achievement of web-based showcasing is knowing how your rivals are getting along.

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