#those are feelings. and i fucking feel them as if they've all been amplified

[chqnified]

Coming to the realisation that "regular everyday people" don't question if they even have empathy and what that means.

[val-cansalute]

PICKING UP THE ———- PIECES -———

ch.2

ch. 1

ch. 3

ch. 4

ch. 5

ch. 6

Doors bound to frames, and patched up curtains drawn over locked windows with rusted bolts.

The silence has lingered in your room since Ellie left, trying desperately to seep out of any gaps, but you’d sealed them all tight, barricaded yourself in, chained your mind and body to the guilt.

A few days must have passed since then. Who knows? They've all melted into each other like you're constantly between the light of day and the dark of night behind those covered windows.

All you've done is lay and think. Nothing more. Appetite and sleep abandoned you, and you retreated into your consciousness, the dark place that started to feel less like fire and more like warmth.

If Soren saw you now - well, God, you can't bring yourself to even consider that.

People came by intermittently and, by people, only the nurse woman and Maria, both of whom were met with an oh so welcoming silence as you ignored their knocks.

Then returned the silence, which happened to be anything but silent for you - the echo of memories hitting the walls of your mind amplifying, screeching mercilessly and bursting your eardrums from the inside out.

The cracking reverberates the loudest - right as his skull made contact with the wall, sending his brains projecting across it. His eyes were bulging out of their sockets, piercing right through you.

His blood - your blood - insidiously crept it’s way into every corner, painting the walls around his deformed figure, dripping down into glistening crimson pools along the floor, spattering across your face, and absolutely drenching your hands in a way that wiped out any possibility of them ever being clean again.

The bat rattled against floor as you let it slip through your trembling fingers and then your mind went blank.

When you resurface, the thoughts still weigh heavy on your mind, and the malicious hiss,

“What have you done?!”

that usually follows morphs into a bloodcurdling cry, begging for your attention.

You can’t stay here. You cannot.

You are safe here, but you have no desire to be.

Alone and trapped in the memory of what happened that day, surrounded by people who only seem to make you feel even more alone in this dark room.

And you knew you had nothing to live for as soon as Soren was gone.

So, you’ll pack up and leave quietly when you can walk again-

BANG BANG BANG

The howling of the beginnings of a blizzard accompanies the sharp thuds against your door, shaking the frame. It almost scares you before you realise it’s just Maria or the nurse bringing food.

You sigh and pull the covers over your face, seeking relief from the harsh cold.

BANG BANG BANG

“HEY! IT’S ME! ELLIE! I KNOW YOU HAVE A CRUTCH! OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR!”

…

“HEY! THERE’S A FUCKING BLIZZARD AND I BROUGHT YOUR ASS FOOD! OPEN THE DOOR!”

BANG BANG-

The lock bursts off the door frame and projects across the room, letting the door fly open, in coming a gust of furious winds and snow, and a panicked string of curses from Ellie’s chapped lips as she rushes in and slams the door shut behind her.

You arose from the bed like a fucking vampire, probably resembling one too, and stared at Ellie who was leaning against the door, pushing out laboured breaths, with your jaw hanging open.

“Fuck, I can fix this- Damn- Shit, I just need… like… Fuck! Why’s this fucking lock so flimsy anyway?! And why the fuck didn’t you just open the door?!”

You ignore her rambling, “You broke my lock?”

“… Sorry.”

“Why are you here?”

She holds up a small stack of containers,

“You haven’t been opening the door so they sent me.”

“To break it open?”

“Hey, I said I was sorry, okay? I’ll fucking fix it… I just… need to check it out first…”

You sigh and let your head fall back against your pillow,

“Ellie, it’s almost midnight, and there’s a fucking blizzard outside. This couldn’t have waited till tomorrow?”

She walks towards where you’re laying and looks over you before setting the containers down on a nightstand.

“I know you haven’t eaten in days. People worry. Don’t be an asshole.”

“They’ll cope,” you grit out disdainfully, though it’s unwarranted, to which Ellie scoffs, seemingly losing her patience with your jarring change in character since she last saw you.

“You’re a fucking dick.”

“I’ll cope.

With a sigh and a shake of her head, Ellie glances around the shadowy corners of your decrepit room.

“Damn.”

“What?”

“Feels like I’m in a coffin, you got a candle or some shit?”

“Uh, I think there’s one on the desk. But I’m going to sleep anyway.”

“Looks like you’ve been sleeping for days. Want me to neaten this place up for ya? You’re not allowed to say no, by the way.”

“How about ‘not really?”

“Oh, you getting smart with me?”

“Fuck off.”

“In a minute.” She trudges around the room, kneeling stiffly to retrieve discarded trash littering the floor with little strained puffs.

For some reason, you’re annoyed that you can’t get back to the silence. You’re annoyed that she interrupted your thoughts so violently. Now she’s cleaning, trying to crack open a window to let out the stale air and smacking it down as soon as a flurry of snowflakes enters, and you’re sitting there, watching her, unable to get back into your head.

A giggle itches at your throat but you swallow it, glancing over her and the way the tip of her nose is tinged pink from the cold.

Cute.

“How are you gonna get home?”

“Uhh… Fuck. I don’t know, just close my eyes and run fast as I can.”

“Are you serious?”

“I mean, yeah, not much else I can do.”

“…You know, you can stay if you want to. Just for the night.”

“Yeah, I don’t know about want to, but I might stick around just to check up on your ankle, you know, do you a favour.”

“Pssh. In that case, you’re more than welcome to leave, dude.”

“No, I'll stay, since you practically begged me.”

“Mhm. That’s what I thought.”

A few moments later, the room is brighter, clearer, fresher, and Ellie forced you to eat under her beady-eyed, scrutinizing gaze. You shift your leg, staring down at the swell beneath the bandage as Ellie stands awkwardly at the foot of your bed, having stripped off a few outer layers.

You look over at her, not really sure what to do other than gather all your willpower to not stare at the way her nipples poke through the fabric adorning her.

Fucking cold in here.

You rub your eyes furiously, as though you want to push them back into your skull, and throw yourself back onto your pillow.

"Jesus. You trynna go blind or something?" she chuckles, a rasp laced in her voice.

"Shhhh. I'm sleeping."

"Oh yeah? You asleep?" You can hear the smirk in her voice and the floorboards creaking beneath her step as she closed in on you. You crack open an eye to give her a bemused look, even though her words made your insides turn.

"Yes."

"Uh-huh, right."

"Right."

"So... You got a sleeping bag or some shit?"

"Nope."

"Blankets?"

"No."

"Wha- I- So are you expecting me to just huddle up on the couch when it's, like, minus a bajillion degrees outside?!"

"I don't know..." You open your eyes and think. It's genuinely cold. There's a blizzard so she can't get home. There's no blankets. You know you're going to regret what you're about to propose, but you spit it out before nerves restrain you.

“You cool with sleeping on the bed?”

She scratches her neck, a torn expression on her face.

"I mean... Isn't that... You know?"

“No, I don't know. Look, it's not weird, just don't think freezing to death seems like an attractive option. Just for the night.”

She scoffs, more so out of shock than mockery, “Okay.”

“Yeah, just a suggestion but if you’re uncomfortable with that then I’ll-”

“No… Why would I be…? Plenty of room for us to share the bed."

“Yeah.”

After a few minutes of awkward shuffling around, Ellie pulls the covers back and settles on the outermost edge of the bed, almost rolling right off, with her back turned to you.

You're not much better, laying close to the other side of the bed, staring up at the ceiling with a body stiff as a plank of wood

"You... uh, you okay over there?" she asks hesitantly

A quick,

"I’m okay, thank you," rushes past your lips as you try to settle your heart rate. It's this time of night that the thoughts start flooding in. You know there's no point in bothering to try to sleep.

The covers rustle beside you as Ellie, courageous as ever, turns to face you, eyes raking over your figure curiously.

"Good... Just checking," she says softly, quietly, words coming out soft as cotton. Then she turns to face the ceiling and silence blankets the room.

After a few hours, your eyes are bloodshot and fixated on the same crack in the wall that they had been for a while now. The glass is starting to overflow, and you don't know that you'll be able to hold back the tears even just for one night.

You can only hope Ellie's asleep when the restrained sound of your sniffles tears through the heavy silence every now and then. Your chest tightens when you hear Ellie start to make some soft grumbling noises, her eyebrows furrowing as she turns back over to face you.

"Hey," she says, her hand hovering over your shoulder,

"Let me see that ankle for a sec."

You squeeze your eyes shut and groan, hoping she can't make out the slight quiver in your voice, "Why? Why can’t we just sleep?"

"Just... wanna see how bad the swelling is," Ellie mumbles, sounding annoyed.

"I know your dumb ass wouldn't tell me if it was hurting.

You sit up shakily, the darkness casting a shadow over your glistening eyes, and lift your leg to your chest. Ellie reaches a hand out and gingerly runs it over the bandages, tugging them away and feeling the area for swelling.

"See? It’s fine."

She gazes up at you, her eyes lingering for a moment before she nods.

"Yeah, looks okay, I guess," she sighs.

"Can't be sure with you... But, fine, whatever, go to sleep."

You rest your head back against the pillow with a sigh and close your eyes.

However, sometime later in the night, you feel Ellie nudging your already awake figure.

"Hey."

She's speaking very quietly, but there's something urgent in her voice. You rub your stinging eyes, somehow annoyed at her for pulling you out of your thoughts.

"What?"

"I need to check your ankle again."

"No, it feels fine, go back to sleep."

Ellie stays silent for a second before letting out a long sigh.

"Yeah, well, I'm checking it anyways," she says.

"Just roll over."

From her tone, you can tell that Ellie isn't asking this time, so you do as she says and show her your wound, though her eyes are yet again focused on your face for a little longer.

"Okay... It looks fine. Again."

Ellie shakes her head for a moment before lying back down. She watches you shuffle around before muttering,

"Damn it."

"What?"

"I... You know what? I can't sleep, so talk to me."

"You were just sleeping th-"

“Yeah, well, it’s gone, so talk to me,” she hissed, to which you rolled your teary eyes, trying to gain a few crumbs of composure before speaking.

“About what?”

“I don’t know. Anything. I mean, I don’t know anything about you.”

“That’s cuz there’s nothing to know,” you mumble. You know that’s not the truth.

“… Just… Look, what’s your favourite colour?”

You raise an eyebrow skeptically,

“Favourite colour? Are you serious?”

“Yes! Just answer the question, asshole.”

“Fine. It’s purple. It’s the most colourful colour.”

“Purple… Huh, didn’t expect that.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know, you just don’t… I don’t know, you don’t exactly seem into colourful stuff. Kinda expected you to say black or something.”

You snort indignantly, turning your head to meet her heavy, mesmerising eyes.

“Says you… I would never.”

“Hey, what’s that supposed to mean?! I’ll have you know that I, also, would never.”

An easy chuckle bubbles through you as you look up at the ceiling. Easy. Simple, all the things she said and the way the conversation slowly diffused into something more balanced, ridden of the initial obvious strain on Ellie’s part to get you to stop feeling whatever you were feeling when she saw your shoulders quiver in the moonlight.

Your head tilts to look at her for the first time after a while, skin dry of the tears that evaporated off your skin as you grinned, telling her the pun you claimed was better than hers and waiting for a response with a mind miraculously clear of the thoughts that polluted it up until a moment ago.

Ellie’s bottom lip is tugged between her teeth to hold back her own smile, though the creases beside her eyes give her away,

“Oh, was that supposed to be a joke?”

“Uh, yeah, it was. Don’t act like you didn’t find it funny! Not after how much you laughed at your shitty ones!”

She raised her eyebrows playfully, feigning a somber tone, “I don’t know, bu- OW! He- What the hell?!” as her face hit the pillow you launched at it. The sight of her face suddenly full of confusion draws a laugh from you - a real one. You hadn’t felt that familiar warmth for so long.

Caught up in the lightheartedness of the moment, you meet her gaze with a grin, holding up the pillow menacingly,

“Sorry, been wanting to do that for a while,”

Ellie grabs onto your wrists, a pure grin adorning her lips as she desperately attempts to fight your hands away from her through laughter and muttered “fuck”s. You give into her struggle with a groan and she pins the pillow and your hands back against the bed.

There’s a shift - both of you can feel it, neither of you expected it, as Ellie looms over you, loose auburn locks dangling close to your skin.

Your stomach turns. This is bad. This is wrong. This feels uncomfortably right.

Play it off, you tell yourself, unable to decipher the thought behind Ellie’s slightly furrowed brow, before you let out a laugh you hope sounded natural and playfully push her back onto the mattress.

Your heart is racing; you can feel the beat in your thighs which twitch every now and then, but you do a good job at hiding it, allowing the conversation to lull into that comforting silence like before, kindly putting you to sleep after hours of trying.

Those thoughts never stopped racing though, outrunning the thoughts of him…

a/n: boring ass chapter again, this is gonna be slow asf but it gets more eventful after this, i promise 😩 prolly some smut later too… creds to cafekitsune for dividers

[lollytea]

Omg Lolly the first 6 minutes were uploaded in better quality by someone and include a few extra seconds where all new outfits except Luz's are on screen (presumably this shot comes after the intro montage but was cut before it for some reason?!)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w8ovrHvJQg4

I have a hunch you'll like Willow's new look :D

Head full!!!! Thoughts many!!!!!

(Okay there's been another leak situation today but we're not gonna talk about all that here. I'm not sure if that quick second after the montage counts but I think it's alright to show since its not spoilery and we all kinda knew what the new outfits would be anyway. But just to be safe I'll put it under the cut.)

Willow flowy cardigan real!!! Its so pretty!!!! Thank god that shirt is a yellow rather than orange, that's so much nicer. I was iffy about the look before but now that I think about, she's really giving off autumn-vibes with this colour palette. Fitting. I think my least favourite part is the little leaf on her shirt (Willow has been playing animal crossing :D!!) is navy. Its throwing me off for some reason. But that's not a huge thing. Overall girl is DRESSIN. Love you Willow.

She's a shutterbug now!! That's adorable!!! Love the idea of Willow using photography as an outlet. Snapping shots of her friends and the palismen to express how much she loves them and pinning them by her bedside. Taking pics of human realm plants and wildlife and sunsets and rain and whatever else she finds beautiful and saving them to show her dads when she gets home.

Also...I have a strong feeling this is gonna be plot relevant...Willow's gonna snap a pic and there's gonna be something Weird in the background, I know it.

(Also we got those drawings they did of their families in high def and I just...she wrote "We're fine, Willow!" next to her dads. I wanna cry. Little Miss "not if I never look down" strikes again.)

ANYWAY there's other stuff to talk about here.

Unsurprisingly Amity looks FANTASTIC!! I love her outfit so SO much. She's such a fashion queen. Gus too oh my god!!! I love his jacket and his bracelets and he's wearing the little amplifier thingie as an earring!!! We love him!!!!

GOOD AFTERNOON TO HUNTER'S PANTS. This outfit was shown in the concept art for the panel and it mentioned that he sewed the patches into the knees himself. Sewing Hunter real. This puts the image in my head of Camila buying some extra clothes for the kids and she gets Hunter some ripped jeans cuz she's like "I'm pretty sure that's what teens are into right now." And Hunter grits a smile about it but he fucking hates them ("why the FUCK would they sell pre-ripped pants??") and takes it upon himself to fix the issue.

I love that Vee is here and helping in the portal process. I knew she'd be present this season but I didn't expect her to have such an active role in the kids efforts to get back home. But of course she's helping!! It's been months and they've bonded!!! Those are her friends!!!

It's so cute how the kids have clearly personalised the old shack to make into their own little hangout spot. The plants, the fairy lights, the pictures, the mirror the corkboard, the cooler, the attempts at wallpaper, the beanbag, even a fucking BASKETBALL HOOP. This is their place. It's absolutely for very serious portal constructing and plotting but they've clearly had a lot of fun over the months here.

Little bed for the palismen 🥺

Also...Flapjack keeps pecking at the floorboards. He was doing it in the montage too. There Is Something Under There and It Belongs To Caleb.

Anyway one shot. Yet so much to say. I love them all so much.

[smallest-turtle]

I've seen you mention it before in some of your Deidre posts (which are all excellent, by the way). But what is your headcannon for the experiments Solus did on Zenos? I've actually not been able to find where their mentioned in game/side stories, so as a concept, it was pretty new to me. But I've seen other people bring it up as well.

Other people have ideas that SOMETHING was done to him based off of like. One line that Elidibus says in one of the throne rooms scenes, I think right when Zenos shows up to get his body back or around then in time, but I don't know the quote off the top of my head.

So I know canonically Zenos' echo is like. Artificial because it's the resonance but because he's had the dreams of the calamity since he was a child I feel like that's not the whole story. I think (and am writing) that he always had the echo, same as anyone else, and it's just atypical because of how garleans can't control aether, and the resonance just amplified it. So basically he's always been able to see people's souls (why he KNOWS Deidre is the ONLY person he's ever found reborn from his dreams of the calamity at Rhalgr's, which are Janus's memories of the event).

What is COMPLETELY homebrew that you're actually asking about is that Emet wanted to figure out if he could essentially commit a rejoining TO SOMEONE SPECIFICALLY. So what he did was he took the soul pieces of Janus from each remaining shard and forced them together. But it's like finding pieces of sea glass that all came from the same bottle and trying to glue them back together after they've been irrevocably changed. Even with 'proper' influxes of insane aetheric power they never actually mesh the way a true shard-wide calamity would make them.

So basically his soul looks like one of those density experiments you do as a child with all the different substances that can't mix except they're all the same color. It freaks Yshtola out whenever she looks at him too long because it's so deeply wrong. And an effect of this is that he does not have memories of this being done to him as a child and he does not have memories from before it was done either. I haven't decided what age it is exactly yet. Maybe 6 or 7. An age that your typical adult WOULD HAVE MEMORIES FROM but he doesn't even know that's weird because he doesn't have friends until shadowbringers.

Another side effect of this is through engaging with the sundered of people that Janus was close with (Azem's entire. Crew basically. So Deidre [azem], Haurchefant/Granson, Caelen, Ryne/Aymeric) he slowly gets snippets of events that Janus's soul remembers, which is why he knows Haurchefant and Deidre are exactly how they should be (siblings) and that Deidre and himself will NOT BE (lovers. Ew? Yucky!).

This will all be mostly pieced together by characters through the last weeks of 5.0 between witnessed family spats with Zenos and Emet (rip Alphinaud he was just trying to draw the cityscape) and the fact that Y'shtola can literally See the fuck up. But here's the author explanation

Thanks for the interest! It's really fun to gush about this sort of thing.

[andromedaexists]

One Month Later (give or take 17 days)

I told y'all I would do an update to my full disclosure post once we hit one month of Δάιος being in the world, and this is me fulfilling that promise!!

It may or may not be seventeen days late though.... life's been a bit tough lately and this was the earliest I could to get to it 😅

ANYWAYS let's talk about what's happened in the last month and a half in regards to self publishing my debut novel: ΔΆΙΟΣ!

As I mentioned in the last update, Δάιος was initially published in eBook, paperback, and hard cover format through both KDP (Amazon's printing house) and IngramSparks. These are still the main was that I am selling my novel, but I have also expanded to include my own website as a store front with Ko-Fi possibly soon to come!

IngramSparks is still a bitch, but I have not run into any more issues with them. If anything, they've kinda come back with a redemption gift! There is a new beta program that I am a part of where I can create links and QR codes that lead customers to buying my book directly from IngramSparks.

This is amazing! That means that I can send people directly to my preferred printing house to buy a copy instead of having them go through a middle man and then wait for weeks for the middle man to get the copy and send it their way! PLUS I get a higher royalty this way! I'm really excited for this feature and what it could possibly do for indie authors in the future!!

KDP is also still a bitch but unfortunately amazon is my best selling platform so I'm stuck with it for the moment! I still can't get any author copies in my hands from them (I ordered 10 paperback copies back in October and they still have not printed and shipped. In this same amount of time I've gotten two orders of author copies from IS and honestly could have gotten more but I'm not selling that many just yet)

My website functioning as a shop is something I've wanted to do since I set up my website. I will say that I am looking at integrating the IngramSparks direct sell interface onto my site or possibly switch over to Ko-Fi, because good lord is sales tax wild. I have owned a business before (I think I still own the LLC too, even though I haven't been in business for a few years), so sales tax is not new to me and is something that I thought I was prepared for. What I wasn't prepared for was how fucked tax code is surrounding books. I genuinely cannot process it and most companies have a whole team dedicated to just US tax code, so selling through a company that will do those taxes for me is what I'm gonna have to do.

Now that we've gotten that out of the way, let's talk numbers!

Since release day, I have received 47 orders through KDP

As you can see, there was a spike the first two days as preorders were processed and sent! Since then, I have had quite a few lulls. Most of these were due to the fact that I have not promoted my book like at all since publication.

Sure, I've made a few posts here and there (most of which are shitposts), but I have spent this past month and a half dedicating my time to my health, my schooling, and supporting my Palestinian siblings in any way that I can. That includes a complete (or near complete, as I have started to post once again as of late) silence on social media in order to amplify their voices.

Also it feels really icky to me to promote an anti-establishment book that hinges on a traumatized man overthrowing his government using riots when there is a literal genocide happening thanks to the backing of our government.

For these reasons, I have not been pushing my book as much as I should have as a debut indie author. Even still, I have received 47 orders on KDP. I am beyond grateful for each and every person who supported my chaos queers.

Of those 47 orders:

34 were eBooks

12 were paperbacks

1 was a hard cover

But don't forget: I've gone wide!

So, how many orders have I received through IngramSparks?

6!! 🎉🎉

Of these, 3 have been eBooks and 3 have been hard cover!! (no IS paperbacks yet...)

I am fairly certain that the eBooks are through foreign retail services like Kobo, since I have a decent group of Canadian and UK readers that would likely prefer that to Amazon!

The hard covers, well, I don't want to be too hopeful... but I think those were orders to bookstores! I applied to a couple in my area, and I really hope they love the book! Can you just imagine walking into a physical indie book shop and seeing your debut novel on their shelves?? That would be a dream come true!

One last place to look at numbers, and that is my website!

Since our last update, I have has two more orders! That means I have sold:

1 eBook

3 paperback

3 hard cover

1 sticker pack

Not too shabby! Especially given the circumstances at the moment!! I am looking at switching this over to Ko-Fi, but that will have to wait until after the holiday season when I can think again!

That brings my totals to:

It is very clear to me that Amazon eBooks are my bread and butter at the moment. Hopefully, I'll be able to sway it to IngramSparks direct or my own website, but hey! We're at a 60 sale milestone!! I'll take it!!

Now that we've gone through the numbers, let's talk earnings. Last time we talked, I told y'all that I spent $2,920.16 on the creation of Δάιος. That number has since gone up, since I've ordered more author copies. We are now sitting at $3,013.55 spent!

So, how much of that have I made back so far?

KDP: According to my calculations $105.82, but KDP is telling me that I actually made $118.77 (I think this is due to sales happening in other countries, I think the royalty rates are ever so slightly different in each country) IS: ??? Theoretically, $13.17 but I have no way of seeing that in my dashboard and probably won't see it until I hit like a $100 threshold with them Website: According to my calculations $117.93, but in actuality $122.93. There is no reason for this one to be off I need to figure that out (edit from future me: YOU DUMBASS IT'S THE $5 STICKER PACK)

That means I've made a ~$236.92 dent in the cost of my book!!! That's so exciting!!

I want to once again say that I know I am incredibly privileged to have a credit card I can put my expenses on as I slowly pay them off, and I do not regret anything I have done in the creation of my book. Even if it makes me cry a little bit at how much I spent.

On to the next thing! Here are some positives and negatives that I have not already mentioned.

Positive first:

My book is still a book!

My GoodReads rating has gone up a little bit thanks to another 5 star review! Icky baby is sitting at a comfy 4.8 right now!

The copyright has come in the mail! I need to frame it, but I fully own the copyright to Δάιος and the content within it!

People have already started asking for a book two 😭😭

Art commissions are starting to come in!

The placeholder chapter title has been fixed and no one noticed except for me! (and if they did, they didn't mention it to me)

And some negatives:

I figured out how to get creme paper for the hard cover editions, but I will have to completely re-do every step for IngramSparks using a new ISBN number and I just... don't wanna (maybe I'll do that right before the release of book two 👀👀)

People are asking for book two already 😭😭

I am mentally and physically at rock bottom right now and all my attention and willpower has been forcibly relocated to school. I need to graduate, I am only twoish weeks away. But that means I have not been able to do anything for this book and it hurts to see Icky baby stagnate like this when his story is meant to be shared

I was accidentally exposed to a two star review thanks to StoryGraph being too good of an app and not refreshing to the home page when I opened it to add a book to my tbr. This was... not a fun time

Now that we've made it through my incredibly long-winded post...

Thank yous for joining me back at the one month(ish) mark!! My next full disclosure update will be at the six (6) month mark. If y'all wanna keep updated with more shenaniganery that I get up to, make sure to check out my nifty newsletter or hand around here on tumblr (I promise I'll actually be back once I graduate. I just gotta. Get my degree.)

[waheelawhisperer]

BG3 ask game, assuming you're still interested (feel free to ignore if not): 1, 3, 6, 20, 24, 26, 27, 33.

With reference to this post

Spoilers contained herein so I'll put it under a read more

Tell us about your Tav! Name, class and subclass, race, pronouns. Do you have a headcanon for where they're from? Their family? Are they a Dark Urge? Or did you choose an Origin Character? Was it an easy decision? (1)

My Tav is... named Tav. She's a High Elf Beast Master Ranger who enjoys nothing more than exploring the wilds of Faerun and having exciting adventures. She has shades of a wandering knight-errant, and I took the Folk Hero background to reflect this. My Tav tries to do good when possible, though she's been known to have a few moments of dickishness (mostly when trying to impress Lae'zel by looking tough in front of her), and she's gathered a bit of a reputation out on the frontier as someone who can be trusted to help those in need. Her various animal companions are all creatures she's aided along her journeys, and they've chosen to assist her in return out of gratitude for her kindness.

Her time spent away from civilization has left my Tav ignorant of some of the finer points of social interaction, but she's naturally insightful and makes an excellent leader (lucky for her, given the group she's fallen in with...). She's fairly well-educated, and knows a good bit about history and magic in addition to the standard collection of knowledge and skills one would expect from a Ranger.

She prefers to fight with a bow (it doubles as a hunting weapon), but she's a fair hand with any kind of sword or spear as well. She knows a few spells and cantrips that amplify her combat performance, but otherwise relies on scrolls for magical firepower. She can usually be found on the high ground, raining arrows down on her foes as Lae'zel and Karlach block them off and guard her and the casters ferociously.

Also she's bi as hell and considerers the companions her harem

Has your Character been using their illithid powers? (3)

Nope! Tav does not like the mind flayers, and Lae'zel likes them even less, two excellent reasons to never use their powers!

Were you able to save everyone when the goblins stormed the gates at the Grove? (6)

If you mean the band of adventurers you encounter when you first reach the Grove, yes. I managed that without much difficulty. It's a fairly straightforward fight. If you mean the full-scale goblin attack near the end of Act 1, that never happened because I killed all the leaders (even Mommy Minthara T_T).

Were you able to save everyone when the goblins stormed the gates at the Grove? (6)

I never actually found this guy because I fucked up the Zhentarim interaction lmao.

Was your illithid tadpole empowered by anything in Act 1? If so, how does your Character feel about that? (24)

I can't remember, actually, but I don't think so. Tav prefers to avoid empowering her tadpole if possible, a philosophy that puts her at odds with Astarion at times. Lae'zel, on the other hand, wholeheartedly approves.

What was your favorite enemy? Did your Character have any memorable fights or moments in combat that were ripe for headcanons and interpretation? (26)

My favorite enemy was probably Minthara, both because sexy drow mommy and because that was about the point where I started having to pay attention in fights instead of click buttons.

In my canon, Lae'zel froze up a bit when the gith in the creche turned on her on Vlaakith's command - not because she was afraid, but because she couldn't process the society she'd devoted herself to throwing her away so easily. Tav jumped into action to defend her and gave a good accounting of herself, but was eventually overwhelmed. Lae'zel snapped out of her funk just in time to save her. It was very romantic.

(I kept getting fucked by the stupid gith status debuffs they like throwing at you and it took me like 3 turns just to get Lae'zel involved in the fight)

The fight against the demon in the prologue was pretty memorable too. I decided to be a munchkin and kill the demon boss for his Everburn Greatsword to improve Lae'zel's capacity for violence, and in-universe this took the form of Tav threading the needle and expertly putting an arrow through his eye while he was fighting the mind flayer. Lae'zel and Tav had already proven to have remarkable synergy in combat as they fought their way through the nautiloid, and Lae'zel was starting to think of her as something worthy of attention, but her heart skipped a beat when Tav made that shot and then skipped another beat when Tav presented her with a giant flaming sword as a gift/show of trust after freeing her from the tiefling trap. It explains why she was so eager to jump Tav's bones, at any rate.

Otherwise that one guy you can convince to kill himself with a high enough persuasion roll was pretty fuckin memorable

Who ended up in your Character's most used party? (27)

Lae'zel. Rarely does Tav's wifey leave her side (unfortunately, this makes it hard to justify using Karlach as much as I'd like to since I want to have a healer and a caster and only have 4 total slots in the party and Tav doesn't fill either role very well). Shadowheart got a lot of use early in the game because no one else had a reliable source of healing, but now that I have picked up Halsin and Jaheira, I don't feel as pressured to bring her along. Otherwise, I just kind of cycle through the companions when I feel like having them in the party or am following questlines or exploring areas they have connections to.

Has your Character allied with the cult of the Absolute? (33)

Fuck no. Tav doesn't trust those bastards any further than Gale can throw them (with his arms, not his magic. He can throw things pretty far with magic).

Please please please ask me some more!

[blubushie]

I have really sensitive and fucked up eyes (not even my goddamn oculist, bless her heart, knows what the fuck is up aside from astigmatism. Like, my problems are not scientifically discribed yet. so thats fun. Other than that I got sensory issues so bright lights are a no go), and sunglasses are useful as hell to keep me comfortable and not flashbanged any time I step outside.

I used to have a special coating on my prescription glasses that would darken into sunglasses in the sun, but those proved most inconvenient. Walking inside after spending over 2 minutes outside effectively blinded me because of the sunglass coating, amplified by the fog that builds up with the change of temperature.

So my latest few prescriptions haven't had the coating. I've been walking around with my eyes basically closed for a bit, out of habit to sheild my eyes. And apparently thats not good for my eyes.

But earlier this year I got sunnies that fit OVER my glasses. Which is miracle and a half because I got round spectacles with wire frames, and literally nothing fits over them. Had to replace my snowmobiling helmet so I could ride and not be a walking safety hazard. (I honestly even considered handmaking myself some sunglasses/goggles that were round and specifically fit over my glasses). But they fit! And I love them. They make me look like a greaser, they do not look stylish in the slightest, but they've become part of my person.

I do look like a dork when they're not perched on top of my normal glasses though. Bc they'll be up on my head. And then I'll be walking around with sunglasses on my head, and normal glasses on my face. I feel like that one tf2 cosmetic where scout has all the glasses.

Either way, they're remaining on my head. The shades stay ON

I honestly feel kinda naked without em

sunnies club :]

-🧮 (boom, now im Abacus anon. I dont think anyone else would choose abacus as a sign off so its Mine now)

"I feel naked without them" is exactly how I feel without my sunnies. The first thing I do when I'm done dressing game is immediately wash my hands and put my sunnies back on. It's not just a matter of being comfortable but also because the Australian sun is a total bitch (sorry, sun-woman, but you really are at times) and I have blue eyes and these things do not mix.

Also because I wear sunnies for work. If I didn't wear sunnies I'd go blind trying to shoot, between the Australian sunlight and the eyestrain of trying to pick out targets. Ngalmudj bless sunnies.

[cvpidarrow]

This is gonna be my thoughts of the Doodlers powers and in talking about it this kinda turned into a lil bit of a Lark and Sparrow analysis.

Massive spoilers for Lark,, Sparrow && Barrys arcs && Spoilers for a LOT of S2- basically- if u haven't completely caught up and finished up to S2 Ep7 then i dont recommend clicking read more

Ok,, so,, as we know from both Lark stabbing Henry at the end of S1 and Anthony describing what happened to Abe: It's safe to say that the Doodler takes the worst in people and amplifies it- like a catalyst of sorts

Going back to S1 with the Doodlers affect on the twins i think that it fed off their need for power and to be strong- and at the end of S1 Larks hatred for Henry. Because sure, the twins are very destructive, but they're also clever,, sneaky and know what they want and how to get it. And the fighting pit along with the pit they were about to send people down so they could spill blood and find the unsung hero? i feel like if it werent for the Doodlers push they wouldn't have done something as big as that. Thinking about this from a logical standpoint- these things dont really do anything for the boys. They dont require some sneaky plan and they dont really give the boys anything in return.

( For the Unsung hero pit they didnt create it because they wanted to do it, they did it because it was just the easiest way to get to the Doodler. They wouldn't have even had that in the first place if they didnt know about the god)

The Lords of Chaos crave violence- as seen in bascially every scene where they're fighting- so why did they have a pit of others fighting? You'd think that they'd jump into the action themselves since thats all they ever want to do. That's because the Doodler pushed them to this point. Because it's one thing to hurt others yourself- its another to be able to get others to hurt each other- and be able to watch as you see them kill one another. Technically, you have no blood on your hands, but you were the person who encouraged them to grab the knife.

・⎯⎯・⎯⎯・

With the effect of Barry- it's one thing to be somewhat self centered and enjoy praise- and its a whole 'nother thing entirely to create a whole ass cult dedicated to you. Like,, aint no way the Doodler didnt have anything to do with that.

・⎯⎯・⎯⎯・

With all this information i feel like the kind of effect the dads in S2 said the Doodler had on them is pretty clear.

Grant could have gotten better but he's definitely still thinking about his time in Faerun. How could he not ? Its his entire job now. And this would probably cause him to think about the shit that happened to him back when he was a kid. The killing and the feelings he had when he either hurt others or himself. And the fact that even after all this time,, after all the help hes gotten,, somewhere deep down he still feels that way? That's probably fucking him up.

・⎯⎯・⎯⎯・ This one might be a bit of a stretch but with Sparrow i feel like theres a chance not everyone was very accepting of the "love wolf". And even if they were,, its not like he immediately changes his entire world view and doesnt still think those chaotic thoughts anymore. But,, everyone was so proud of him for becoming this "Love Wolf". For being the kinda and understanding one- for being the more normal of the two. Proud that he wasn't as destructive as he used to be. But theres no fuckin way he didnt still feel like causing chaos.

He began to "improve"- but everyone immediately jumped on that and treated it like he was doing this for years. But he wasn't. But everyone kept praising him like he was- which at some point probably made him feel guilty about those thoughts. Why couldn't he just be the Love Wolf he wanted to be? Why did he still think these mean thoughts- everyones acting like he should be over them by now but hes not- why wasn't he?

It's like if someone tried to stop drinking and they managed to not drink for a week. And everyone praises them and acts like they've been 3 years sober or something and is never going to drink again. Then every time that person gets the urge to make themselves a drink-they'd start feeling guilty.

・⎯⎯・⎯⎯・

And uh yeah ! Thats kinda all i got so far ! Hope my ramblings were actually somewhat coherent (；・∀・)

[pop-punklouis]

here to talk about stranger things

i'm a sucker for cinematography and some shots were really well done. specifically the one where the kids are biking and it takes you to the upside down where the adults are biking too!

i'm so glad they're focusing on eleven's traumas because phew she has been through a lot. my mind's absolutely blown because of the parallels between how manipulative dr brenner is as a guardian figure vs how joyce (and hopper) emit this kindness and consent. i've talked about it a bit here.

i'm so mad because they did will SO dirty like my poor boy didn't go through so much shit for him to be brushed aside like that, especially when he's like head canonically queer.

also absolutely hate how one dimensional they've made jonathan.

also, eleven deserves someone better than mike. free her from him pls.

i really don't want the nancy/steve thing to happen again. if anything, in honour of pride month let nancy/robin be a thing instead

also wtf is up with suzie's family oh my god??

as always, steve gets 💋💋 one of the best character developments i've seen tbh

in relation to you talking about how will+jonathon+mike got so little screen time, i feel like the new characters, like the baseball captain dude the one who was dating chrissy got more screen time than the trio 😂

anyways this got long im sorry 🙈

SONIIII please hello. yes! there are always certain scenes when a new ST season drops that cause me drool with how much I love its cinematography. I was kinda let down by the CGI this season though. It was *yawn* how much of it they used instead of utilizing the hybrid of physical/digital effects. Like some scenes had great CGI while just five minutes later it is horrid. so weird to me because it takes me out of the immersion rip

i do like how they actually gave eleven a proper backstory! i found those scenes to be more interesting this season as the pacing felt off to me, and it dragged a bit in parts. so getting a more developed background was refreshing for her. and oooo i haven't had time to properly analyze parallels, but that was a great catch regarding the difference between Brenner and Joyce/Hop as guardian figures to El 👀

they've continuously pushed Will to the backburner since season 3 and I'm! sick of! it! i want to see more of him and he deserves better tbh (much better than mike but i digress lmao) pretty homophobic if you ask me 🔪😵‍💫

did jonathan even.... exist this season. he was so unmemorable it is hard to tell. what even was the point of will+mike+jonathan's C plot besides the duffer brothers having absolutely nothing going for their storyline so just. didn't really do anything with it lmao and YEAH?? honestly fuck mike he annoys me. both el and will deserve better 💅🏼

the hamfisted nancy/steve rekindling drives me NUTS. it is such lazy writing and is only building to steve getting his hopes up and having them crushed again when jonathan tumbles back into the actual plot and "gets the girl" again its so boring and expected. please give steve something else to focus on. give him MORE than being the mopey ex boyfriend. let him be happy please. nancy/robin??? i'd LOVE to see it actually 💕

Suzie's family is mormon!! that like. explains practically everything about that household's dynamics lol they just amplified the Mormon stereotype but its hilarious djrjrktk

steve continues to be one of the only characters to carry this show on his back for another season like thank you king as always 🌹💋

(and don’t be sorry!! i could ramble about stranger things all day 🫣)

[eulchu]

wdym they've been treating gnf weird?

one can only read so many 'george is smelly and disgusting and he's a socially inadequate loser who's so far down in the social scale he fell off it that's why he gets no bitches ever btw he's either gay (derogatory) or an incel (derogatory) + you'd give him a bike and he wouldn't know what to do with it he's clueless about normal life tasks lol he can't walk 2 steps without falling on his ass he's gonna make a fool of himself in the irl manhunt video' jokes until they're fed up

there's this really fucking annoying internet trend where people like to one-up each other by amplifying satire and jokes to the point where they turn grotesque because apparently now the new trend is to shock your audience rather than entertain it. take for example harmless jokes from the waterpark video like "omg gnf is so chaotic", that got completely picked apart and turned into a competition of who can make the most shocking post about how batshit crazy and incoherent gnf is when. he was just having fun? same thing with the stupid exercise posts. his stamina is SO shit as of right now but to say he's a weak little man who will tumble over the second he tries to run is so stupid. as if he didn't overrun ksi and didn't pick up a medium bowling ball like it was made of thin air or went through a set of monkey bars like it was nothing

he has quirks SURE and i love them and i think they're endearing. but we've gotten to a point where those quirks have gotten so hyperbolic to me it feels like we're laughing at him instead of with him. and i don't mean it in a 'oh no gogy woggy he will see those comments and cry about it for 3 days 🙁' because dream said so himself, he DOES have a thick skin. i just mean for ME it's not enjoyable. he's getting treated like he's a fucking loser and i don't like it, it feels like we're all making fun of this guy that we don't even know.

[golbrocklovely]

There are influencers using their platforms, not Kat and Stas but i did see some that have been sharing stories sent to them from medical personnel as to what is currently happening in their states. Amplifying the voices of those in direct danger right now and personally as someone in a safe state, it gives me the push to do more.

Btw regarding Kat, shes only ever actually said something when it came to Uvalde, other then that she is always mum for whatever reason except for the occasional like which does nothing. She never talks about anything of use (sorry not sorry im being honest she doesn’t her tweets are all for clicks). Plus like you said, she lives in a prochoice state, is taken care of by her parents (financially) and Sam, and is Canadian. Canada announced today they will allow Americans to get abortions there.

Anastasia from the little we know of her she is proud to be Russian but once the war happened she went mum only to share some video from Arnold Schwarzenegger defending the people of Russia and American Russians. I dont know if its ignorance on both their parts, or materialistic immaturity, but its definitely giving “doesn’t affect me, im safe”. BUT the thing to remember is those of us in safe states, at any given moment our situation can change too.

i honestly think it's just a privilege thing. where bc it's not directly effecting them, they don't care. and it's not even that they don't care, they just don't want to learn about it bc "out of sight, out of mind".

and i think part of it is also they can't imagine not having the choice to do what they want with their bodies in the first place. and i think it's also "well i'm never gonna have an abortion so i'm fine", which that's great that you have the choice to do that, but it could easily be taken away if we don't fight.

and then as for stas and her russian side… idk. it's probably similar to having pride for your home country even if they've done atrocious things too. which i think you're allowed to feel, but you also gotta admit when they've fucked up too.

and while there are definitely a decent amount of ppl using their platforms, if stas or kat or snc or whoever don't want to use theirs, we can't force them too.

[thundergrace]

good Sam showing how good Malcom and Sam compliment each other even when they aren’t together romantically. I love that he inspired her to take charge! and then also finally having Sam and Lex reconcile! the last ep was so good. When Sam told lex they’re better because of everything it reminded me of the Brooke and Peyton scene in s4 of oth where Brooke tells Peyton they can’t change the past but maybe they can be better. Ik Sophia wouldn’t let me down!

I'm worried about the finale because I really got EVERYTHING I wanted in this episode, so I assume it'll all be taken away lol

Man Malcolm and Sam are so good and every episode shows how Malcolm is a grown man and Caleb is a whiney manchild who doesn't actually care about what Sam wants. He only cares about her wanting him. She couldn't be clearer about where she stands and what she wants/needs from him and EVERY episode he makes her feel guilty for not giving him more. Fuck this guy my GOD.

And the sad thing is when he was pretending to be her friend with no romantic ulterior motives, he was a great friend and it would be so nice if they could actually just be that. This is the wackest love triangle ever because I don't think there's ever been a more clear right and wrong choice. Caleb is her past, and Malcolm should be her future. They've helped each other grow so much and most of it was after their short-lived romance. Also, absolute power couple shit right there.

Malcolm taking a seat on the board. Sam becoming CT chief. They'll have the same positions has her parents, it's like they've dethroned them. This is so good!

Sam and Lex!!!! I love it! I absolutely love it! I love that we got to know this friendship at the worst moment for it. At its collapse. But we could still get those glimpses of how good they were together. We got it from seeing the pain in them from what they lost. Like we saw they lost a very important part of their lives when they weren't friends anymore. And Sam is right, they had issues before Rob and all Rob and Lex's relationship did was bring all their stuff to the surface. Now they can rebuild and they'll be stronger than before.

Really want Joey and Isan to hook up. Like what.... what are they doing with these two even???

Anyway, I LOVE the drama on this show so much. I'm really over most straightforward dramas but I'm completely invested in all of this, I forgot how good it could be when it's well done. I also like how they just kinda weave in secondary characters to amplify the stories and conflicts of the primary characters instead of throwing them at you and overwhelming and overloading the plots from jump.

[lunafaeris-archive]

📄 talk science to him luna

(...tho if anton wants to do a report bc surely they've hung out a bit more by now i'm here for that too)

send “📄” and my muse will write a scientific report on your muse | accepting.

Name: Zelos Wilder Title(s), Alias(es): The Chosen(?), Local horn-dog Age: 24 Species: Human, Angel(?)

          As far as first impressions go, she didn’t seem like much. A smooth talker, over-confident, not nearly enough to back it up in my opinion. So I never gave it much thought. He was just another skirt chaser, drunk on youth, a sinner in his own right. I don’t know why he decided to latch onto me, other than the obvious, but the fact that I never gave in to his wiles might have struck a chord with him. I can’t say for certain and I won’t speak to his thoughts on the matter... but that’s my own personal theory.

          Now... I have mixed thoughts as to who, much less what he is. I never concealed my identity from him, which in retrospect is possibly why he kept his own a secret. I’m proud of who and what I am and I will never diminish that fact. Which is why I find angels so disdainful, so pompous and uptight, unable to see that they’re just being used. But even in his own words, he says he’s not like that. Like the angels from the holy books. He doesn’t look like them, I’ll give him that much. He got to see what they looked like firsthand, ugly, winged vermin with a thousand-rotating eyes, a horrifying spectacle fit for the end of days, more machines of war than resembling anything close to human.

          Yet, he found it in himself to defy them. All for my sake. How ironic, how the hunter in me became the hunted... though it wasn’t the first time I’ve been treated as a lowly prey animal. By those clutching onto their holy doctrines, white knuckles, saying that my existence is a sin against nature. Because I chose not to lay down and die, or live a meaningless life for someone else. Because I’m proud of who and what I am.

          Because I’m proud... it’s because of that I didn’t want him to see it. If it hadn’t been so poorly timed, I could have escaped, I could have gone into hiding until it passed. No one deserves to see me like that, no one has the bloody right! So why? The death rattles... the edge of a phantom blade sticking itself deep into my eye. So far that I can feel it, scrambling my brain, every ounce of pain and torment amplified a hundred fold. Reminding me just how weak I am...

          He saw it. So now what? What do I do? Where do I go from here?

                    I hate this. I fucking hate this. Why? In my most vulnerable moment? What is this, some cruel, cosmic joke? Don’t look at me look like that, like I’m some frightened little rabbit. I’m not someone to be pitied... you know that better than anyone. So why?

@zelotae

[ma-gic-gay]

"What the fuck?" Michael asks, voice at a dangerous level. He startles them and they pull apart. "You two promised me you're not in a relationship, so what do you call this?"

They've been caught.

Shit.

"Kissing," Carly answers quickly, half lying and half telling the truth. "We're not dating."

"Then please explain to me what this is, Mom," he asks. "You too, Jason."

"Explain what?" Joss asks, walking into the room.

"They kissed."

"Avery owes me 5 bucks now," the blonde smiles. "I can buy a coffee with that money."

"Great, a free coffee. Are you at all having an emotional reaction to Mom and Jason kissing?" Michael asks his sister, who's ignoring him.

"Not my business who Mom and Jason kiss," she responds calmly.

When did she get so grown up? She had her "child of the corn" years a few years ago, but now she's an adult and not freaking out over this? His goddaughter's all grown up. One hell of a way to make you feel old.

"I can't believe you're so calm about this, Joss! They lied to us!"

"Did they? They said they weren't dating. First off, that's a present tense which could've changed, and they didn't say anything about kissing in hospitals," she says, confused.

"Here's that first aid kit for Jason, Carly," Elizabeth says, entering the tense room and handing it to the traumatized woman in the hospital bed. "Do you two need something?"

"My mother to figure out what the hell she feels for Jason Morgan," Michael answers bitterly.

"I'm not going to ask."

"They kissed! And they did it yesterday!" Michael exclaims, emotions getting the best of him before he can remember his tact.

Everyone's shocked he screamed that, Elizabeth especially. "Well. Um, I'm gonna head out. You guys enjoy... Whatever this is."

That's one way for it to come out.

"It's out in the open now," Carly chuckles, opening up the first aid kit and pulling out the bandages, hydrogen peroxide, and Neosporin.

"Mom, what are you doing with his hand?"

"He punched a wall so I'm cleaning up the cuts."

"Why'd you do that?"

"People were gossipping about your mother and what happened to her tonight. It pissed me off and I ended up punching a wall."

"By the looks of it you broke the wall."

"Nah, just a few scratches," Jason tells him before the stinging sensation of the hydrogen peroxide is on his hand. Not exactly a pleasant one.

"Well, are you okay?"

"Besides the fact your mother is stinging me with this stuff, I'm fine."

"Good. What happened to you tonight, Mom?" Michael asks gingerly.

Suddenly, the tension in the air amplifies by 50 if that's even possible. There's a good minute and a half where it's just an awkward silence before Carly answers him, filling the time with applying bandaids to his wounds, "Cyrus took me from the Metro Court. Well, one of his goons. But the goon took me to the Floating Rib, that little room above the bar. Somehow he knew the importance of that place to me and I was kidnapped. He raped me. I also got pretty beat up when I was resisting. Just when I was sure I'd never leave that room, Jason came in and saved me. Cyrus is in police custody right now and there's no way in hell he's getting off."

"He always saves all of us," Joss smiles at him. "Thanks."

"Anytime. I'll always save you guys, you know that," Jason returns her smile and sees one appear on Michael's face as well, though he's half ready to kill someone. It always happens when someone brings up rape, Michael gets distant and mad. Probably because of his own experience with it.

It's a good thing Cyrus is in police custody because if he wasn't, Jason has a feeling that he'd end up helping them cover up a murder.

"Mom, I'm so sorry you had to go through it. Cyrus is a sick bastard. You know that I'll be able to pull some strings and all of the Quartermaine's will testify in your behalf if you need to go to trial," Michael offers.

"Thanks, but I'm hoping he'll plead guilty and I won't have to sit through a trial."

"Well, if you do, you've got the best lawyer in the state on your side and all of us," Joss says, "besides, there's a bunch of evidence he did it. And everyone knows Jason's practically incapable of lying, so he'll be a great witness!"

"You, on the other hand, are a good liar, Joss," Michael counters.

"The law doesn't know that, Michael."

"I better never get a call I have to bail you out of jail."

"I'll call Cam or Trina. You'll be last on the list of people I'd call to bail me out, trust me," she playfully reassures her brother.

"Is that an insult or a compliment?"

"You pick."

"I'm sorry, but Mrs. Corinthos cannot have visitors anymore," Epiphany tells them, interrupting the group gathering.

Sadly, her kids say goodbye to her, promising to visit in the morning. Jason, however, doesn't leave his chair. "Mr. Morgan, did you hear me? No more visitors. Visiting hours are over."

"I'm family."

"So are her children. They don't get to stay the night, neither do you."

"I need him to stay. When I sleep, I keep having nightmares- screaming, terrifying nightmares, and he's the only one who can get me back to sleep. Come on, Epiphany, you know we always spend the night in each other's hospital rooms," Carly attempts to bargain with the nurse.

"And if this were normal circumstances, I would allow it."

"What about this isn't normal circumstances?" Jason asks.

"Well, first off, Michael told Elizabeth about your... Activity. And second, this is a police investigation too. Hospital policy says that he can't stay the night."

"Oh my god," Carly scoffs, "because my son discussed something with us that Lizzie overheard and then spread to the whole town by now, he can't spend the night? Epiphany, I've given myself panic attacks with these nightmares already and he's been here! He's the only person who can calm me down and I know how important rest is for recovery. Besides, it's not like we have no self control. I would never have sex in a hospital."

Epiphany cocks an eyebrow at Jason, who innocently raises his hands. "You know me better than that."

Carly starts laughing at him being stared down by Epiphany, who he simply stated blankly at back. It's a contest of who's going to back down first, and they all know he'll win. His stubbornness is one personality trait that always comes out in hospitals.

"Fine. But I swear, if you two go at it, there will be hell to pay," Epiphany threatens before leaving, letting Jason stay in there. A win. "And she cannot stay up all night making out with you, she needs her rest. So do you, you look like hell."

"Yes ma'am," they answer and she shakes her head before closing the door.

"I feel like I'm in high school again," Carly jokes.

"No clue what that's like."

"Hell, if you're me. You, though, I bet you were that one kid all the teachers loved and the students too. A golden boy. I'm convinced you would've hated me in high school."

"Well, I wouldn't have remembered it anyways," he reminds her.

"Nah, I'm unforgettable," she says, a smirk playing on her lips. "Even with an amnesia causing coma."

"That's not how it-" he gets cut off by her kissing him again.

This is becoming more and more normal and that scares him. He's comfortable in his reality and, as usual, she's ready to bring Hurricane Carly into his life and break his equilibrium.

Well, that and the thought she could make another of those lists. The list scares him more than breaking this state of equilibrium.

"We promised Epiphany we wouldn't do this," he reminds her when they break apart.

"No, we promised her I'd rest and that we wouldn't stay up all night kissing or have sex," Carly corrects.

"Yes, you need your rest, Carly. Please, try to sleep," he urges.

"I'm offended!"

"Carly-"

"You have a guy telling you you're wrong and shut him up and now you've got to sleep. God how times have changed."

"No, it's not that. You, however, need your sleep. Besides, if you have a nightmare, I promise you can kiss me again," he finds himself saying.

Well. That part was unexpected. He really needs a reevaluation of feelings for her.

"Well, if his Royal Highness-"

"I'll kiss you if you have a nightmare, alright?" Jason revises his statement and she smiles.

"Deal."

"Good, you need to rest."

"So do you."

"Just worry about yourself, I'm fine."

"Mhm," she haphazardly agrees, allowing herself to fall back into a slumber while he shifts in the chair he's mastered the ability of sleeping in over the years.

To be continued later in life when it's not 1:30 am est

go to sleep :)