#thrown together post no quotes sorry

[undercat-overdog]

"It's ok to kill elves because they respawn" and "death isn't serious for elves" will never not be a hilariously bad argument.

Respawn is hardly guaranteed. At least some individuals (Aegnor, Feanor, Finwe) will not be reborn, at least for the entire lifespan of the planet; death can be permanent. I think the various writings about Mandos and rebirth (plenty of juicy stuff in NoME in particular if you're looking) imply that it's not particularly uncommon for Elves not to return to life.

Mandos isn't a pleasant place to be nor is it where Elves are meant to be. Its name literally means "prison" - the word is related to "Angband" even (the "mandos" and "band" elements are cognate).

Death itself is pretty damn traumatic! Even if I pop back up in 15 minutes like a mob in an mmo, a sword through the gut's not fun.

All evidence suggests that Elves (and Valar) treat death very seriously and don't think it's unimportant. The Elves of Beleriand don't even sing songs about Fingolfin's death because the grief is too much.

For Elves of Middle-earth who are killed, go Mandos, and are reborn in Aman - they are sent somewhere that they may not willingly have chosen to go and can't leave. There's not really a great real world analogue to this (I'm intentionally avoiding the potential closest ones for reasons) but I don't think it's good and removing that choice - through violently murdering someone - is itself a crime.

[emperor-palpaminty]

Possessive HCs

Minors DNI, must have age in bio to interact or else ya get blocked. TW for possessive kink and all that jazz. i am unhinged and have no train of thought that makes sense. Also my inbox is open for requests hehe

(This post features Price, Ghost, Soap, Gaz, and Alejandro with anGN reader)

Price

LAWDY this man gives me possessive vibes. He's a captain after all, he's used to having his way and people respect his property.

And you are, after all, his... Right?

Price doesn't get the appeal of hickies at first. They seem immature, silly even, and he thinks they're more trouble than they're worth. And then he sees you with one that he gave you the day before.

Totally changes everything.

He'll cover you in hickies if he can, where where your flesh is soft enough. If your job is more "professional" and would frown upon it he would make sure to leave some just where the corners of a bruise is peeking out from under the collar of your shirt, just so people can still know you're his.

If someone comes up to flirt with you, he makes sure he winds an arm around you and maintains eye contact with the intrusive party until they get the hint and leave. He's the kind of guy who would stare the flirter in the face while kissing your neck, or up your arm, and he would carry the conversation on calmly.

Casually refers to you as "my girl/lad/love", "pretty thing", etc. Just as long as it's obvious you're his.

Ghost

In my brain, he's the most possessive but because he wants to stay as anon as possible, he doesn't get super grabby or touchy in public. The second you get behind closed doors however? Hooooo mama.

He marks you up good. Scratches, hickies, everything. Even if they aren't visible to others it is enough to remind you and that's enough for him. He is fine with getting some of his own too, but he prefers they stay somewhat hidden. Part of him wants to make sure you're as safe as possible, and that includes not letting the enemy know he's getting hickies from someone.

If someone comes up to flirt with you, I can see Simon standing nearby- but always staring down the person seeking your affections. You are polite to them but tell them you aren't interested, and if they press on that's when Simon comes over. He's probably thrown a guy through a window before TBH. After that he takes you home and treats you real good ;P

Soap

Yeah. yeah. yeaaaaahhhhhhh. This man is loud as hell and has a short ass temper when it comes to you. When others come up to you or are even looking your way, he grabs your waist or hand or pulls you close. He has one hundred percent given you a hickey in the middle of a crowded room (club? bar? who knows?) just because he saw a couple of folks looking your way with eyes that lingered too long. If someone tries to flirt, he is not shy at all about speaking up or pulling you behind him ("Sorry, this one's taken, lad. Go find someone else for the night.")

He will also mark you up too with all the hickies and scratches but he loves when you do the same to him. Honestly, the more hickies the better. If you give him any, he WILL walk around shirtless just to show them off. (Price scolds you for quote, "defacing government property")

Gaz

In my head Gaz isn't like. super kinky. He just seems so sweet in the games. I could be totally wrong though and he could be a kinky bastard (drop your Gaz HCs). But this is MY HEAD, welcome to the terror dome.

Yeah, Gaz isn't super possessive in a kinky way, but he does like when people know you're together. He'll slip an arm around you, or put his hand in yours. At one point as a joke you got a shirt printed with his face on it that said "Gaz's Guy/Gal" and he thought it was the funniest thing ever.

If someone comes up to flirt with you he's pretty quick to intervene. He will slip between you and the person and try to redirect them away- but if it comes down to it, he will knock a guy out for flirting with his partner despite a plethora of rejections and "no"s.

Alejandro

Alejandro is PASSIONATE deadass, and doesn't give a shit about who is watching. He'll pick up your hands and kiss them any time any where, or hold your face, or he will just stare into your eyes from across the room. The tension is palpable, you can palp it.

When it comes to showing you off or being possessive, he's more defensive. He will stand between you and the person coming to flirt with you and square up, just to remind them that this is not their place or purpose.

Afterward, he of course kisses you and makes love to you rather intensely ("Amor de mi vida, no one can do this to you, and even if they were lucky enough they wouldn't do this like I do"). And no matter what, you wouldn't let anyone else do that to you, because it's true- no one could do this (or you) like he can. Also he's vocal- he lets the both of you be heard if he's enjoying himself and he wants everyone to know that those sounds from your mouth were because of him.

[bleachbleachbleach]

Been thinking about Shinji and Momo and specifically abt them in relations to the system or the ideal of the system that kind of screwed them over. With Shinji being unjustly thrown out and no one rlly fully unpacking how much of an HR concern was Aizen’s weird boundaries with Momo. You once mentioned in one of ur posts abt Shinji that the Vizards for sure do not come back with full trust in the soul society again and have their own agendas. This makes me wonder how Shinji and Momo navigate that system together now that both of them have made the decision to continue to serve under it? Momo, herself does come across as duty bound but has shown instances of acting against it when she feels the need to for the sake of the greater good (like disobeying orders to save hisagi, or admitting that not all laws are good laws even if she’s technically quoting Aizen) Sorry for the rambling! These two just fascinate me cuz I feel like aside from the whole Aizen thing, they’re like two diff flavors of being back on the job after being screwed over. The somewhat jaded mentor and the eager beaver who got the rug thrown under her.

We joke about Gotei HR all the time, but honestly in the context of their own world and worldviews would Aizen and Hinamori come across to anyone as having weird boundaries? I’m not saying it didn’t get weird but I kind of feel like part of the nature of the thing is that it’d be hard for anyone in Soul Society to point to anything Aizen did that was notably weirder than anything else everyone else does. I’m not saying it wouldn’t be an HR violation somewhere (I just completed my state-mandated sexual harassment training three days ago, so it’s all nice and fresh, LOL) but even if the Gotei had HR I doubt it would have helped in Aizen and Hinamori’s case.

I know there are people who get very deep into canonicity debates about whether Aizen and Hinamori ever slept with each other, but I’m not personally all that interested in the genre as a whole—like, the nailing down of what is or isn’t canon. In fanfic, I figure anything goes if you can make it work for you in your story. For my part, I think Aizen would take pride in not having to have sex with Hinamori in order to make his plans work. Like an *everyone* does sexual manipulation but he doesn’t even *have* to and that’s the *beauty* of the game kind of deal.

But to the question itself!

My take on Shinji is that he is, of course, very well aware of the ways the Gotei fucked him and the rest of the Vizard, and has no illusions about that. But he’s not someone who simmers in that in the same way that Hiyori does.

Honestly, maybe a good comparison might be that Shinji treats the Gotei the way he treated Aizen as a vice-captain. According to Aizen, that was a mistake, but Shinji knows the Gotei better than he ever knew Aizen. Arguably, the Gotei is more knowable than Aizen. Shinji has a certain savvy about him with respect to the Gotei as an institution, and if you now how it works, then there are degrees to which it can be managed, and perhaps even made to work for you. And if you want that to happen, the only place you can do that work is inside it, as one of its Captains. Shinji’s known that since even before TBTP, probably since before he was even himself a Captain the first time around.

But I think another key element here is that Shinji is very, very good at separating the work from the institution from the people. He can engage his octopus brain and hold the meaning of what shinigami effect in the world separate from the ethical and bureaucratic conundrums posed by the Gotei, separate from the personalities that make it up (which are the problem and the best part about the Gotei in turns). He reminds me of this guy who’s been in my toxic-ass profession for AGES but still has a ton of energy and capacity for wonder and enthusiasm and being smart in ways that make everyone smarter, and he manages this by being absolutely ruthless about not getting all sopped up by departmental drama or overly precious about ~the profession~ and making very intentional decisions about what matters and what absolutely doesn’t. I think having that as a model was incredibly useful for Hinamori, as someone with a propensity to care deeply for and about everything.

I mentioned in the tags of another post that I envisioned Hinamori as having a healing justice orientation to the world, part of which is about locating “evil” outside of individuals. It is not inherent, but made. While this does not absolve Aizen of his actions or their supporting worldviews, a path to forgiveness is at least partly about recognizing the bigger picture that produced the conditions for the fomenting of these views/plans. (And that’s before the many ways the system failed them in ways that didn’t come directly through Aizen.) Which means that moving past Aizen is also about moving past the Gotei/Soul Society, while also continuing to work for it—in a major, responsible way.

Like, Hinamori is not clocking in to sweep the floors and then leave to her wife and kids. She’s leading the thing. So what’s the journey there? We see her reclaim her role as 5th Division Vice-Captain in the Winter War (as distinct from being Aizen’s Vice-Captain—ymmv on this, like Matsumoto’s does). In that role, Hinamori has not seemed to have much of a problem with challenging authority when she felt it just to do so, even in moments of more even temper (shouting at Byakuya over Renji’s unconscious body lol). Which I feel like lends credence to the idea that Aizen’s betrayal was probably not her introduction to the world being often an unjust and deeply painful place, or even to the Gotei being these things. Like, I think she understood that. Maybe Aizen even talked to her about that, and part of why she liked him so much was the opportunity to have these long, intellectual conversations about philosophy and governance. And what do you do at the end of these conversations? You can be bitter and angry about it; you can be angry and want to burn it down; you can drink the Kool-Aid and become complicit in it; you can naively deny it and either become complicit in it or get destroyed by it; or you can—

Do what Shinji and Hinamori do about it together, which is to resolve to be the energy they wish to see in the world, which in their interpretation also requires some complicity—being officers in Gotei—and, having made that choice, periodically needing to process that. I mean, I think that’s part and parcel of being involved in any kind of institution (I know I think about it allllll the fucking time), but I imagine the experience is further magnified by the particular histories Shinji and Hinamori have with the Gotei.

I imagine sometimes—a rough week at the office, or in the aftermath of a Blood War they wonder if they aren’t being too complicit. Or, conversely, if they aren’t echoing Aizen too much, in their resolution to craft a world of their own devising. But they were different people, both from each other and very much from Aizen; their devices and visions are different, too. And so the fear falls away.

It will come back. It will probably never leave. But sometimes it’s better to be haunted than not, and ghosts can be welcome reminders.

[ouabhs]

acftl review (finally)

I give it a 3 ⭐️ (as much as it pains me) even then it’s only this high bc I love evajacks so much

so I was finally able to gather my thoughts into one post and while there were many things I enjoyed a few others didn’t sit right..

1. the whole story curse thing.. it makes sense that the story curse would twist things which is why some things were left unexplained but it doesn’t feel like it was done deliberately?? it just felt like stephanie genuinely didn’t know how to tie some things together.. like sure not every single thing needs an explanation but she emphasised certain things wayyy too much in the first two books for them to be completely ignored for example evajacks talking to each other in their minds. Even the broken heart scar wasn’t addressed again after like halfway through acftl

2. too much apollo.. sorry this is not even just me being biased or whatever like I do agree his pov helped explain the plot from a different perspective but he got wayyy more of a backstory and a conclusion to his character than jacks for a someone that wasn’t as present in the last 2 books.. and this was supposed to be jacks’ series kinda (ik it was evangelines too) but I feel like jacks got sidelined hard and that’s disappointing. It also didn’t help that whenever there was an intense scene between evajacks the pov would switch to apollo.. to be fair I think having 3 povs was just hard to execute in general

3. the kiss scene.. usually it would not be a big deal but it’s a big part of jacks character that he can’t kiss girls without killing them idk I thought him finally getting to kiss evangeline would be a lot more… grand? they barely got a page or any detail and then the next chapter was “once upon a time there was kissing and more kissing 🥰🥰” which was even more underwhelming. Even apollo and evangelines kiss scenes were longer and more detailed and they got multiple

4. the overall vibe of the 3rd book felt very different to the first two I couldn’t put my finger on it at first but I feel like it had something to do with the writing.. at some parts it felt familiar (like all the descriptions and the fairytale aspects) but others it just felt different?

5. during too many scenes it just felt like stephanie was rewriting tbona.. like I haven’t really seen anyone say this yet but a good chunk of the book was quotes from tbona which I feel took up a lot of unnecessary space and could’ve been used to develop other plots or characters? Literally someone that hasn’t read tbona could get a gist of what happened cause it’s all summarised in there 😭

6. the plot in general.. contrary to popular belief I don’t think this was that romance focused (as people claim as to why things weren’t explained) because I think stephanie incorporated more plot in here but it was just different to what we saw in the last books because previous characters (luc, marisol, tiberius, kristof) weren’t as present in this book and new characters plots and explanations were just thrown in.. not much felt connected

7. jacks’ backstory.. (going back to my second point) how he became a fate was really glossed over I feel and was only briefly mentioned but I just wanted more.. I do like the fact that he said he did it for chaos and I wish their friendship was delved into more because he literally turned to immortality because his friend would be alone. What about his parents? His friendship with Lyric? The merrywood three in general? His life when he was trapped in the card?

8. the first fox.. again wayy too significant to be missed out especially since jacks doesn’t really remember whether or not he had a thing for her and chaos said evangeline was similar to her.. how was there no link?

I definitely have more to add but for now my main takeaway is that while tbona was very hard to top I feel like acftl could’ve been so much more especially since it was set up so well.. I think so many people are disappointed because it doesn’t hold up as well for the last book in a series but I’m just glad evajacks got their happy ending 🫠

[lexawoah13]

How to Exit a Room preview

Here’s a little snippet from the fix I’ve been writing. It’s taken from the middle of it so don’t worry there’s a bit of intro coming. Anyways let me know what you think and if you wanna be added to a tag list when I actually start posting

The majority of people leave and as the life of this party is dying, Beomgyu jumps at the opportunity to start his favourite game. “7 MINUTES TIME!” He shouts out and the crowd cheers, everyone migrating to the central couches where Beomgyu is standing. Beomgyu names himself “game master” giving him full control of the entire game. Because this isn’t your basic game of 7 minutes in heaven. No no. This frat had their own version combining it with truth or dare.

“For the rules! I’ll pick a couple to enter the room, and then said couple will pick a truth or a dare” he wiggles his eyebrows as he says dare, hinting at the contents of those dares, “from this hat” shaking the TΡΦ crested ball hat, in from of him “said task to be completed during your 7 minutes together and require some proof” These can be anything from learning each others fantasies to straight up fucking.” That's both the fun and the risk of this mishmashed game.

Of course Beomgyu being the good Fraternity Brother he is, he knows that Soobin is dying for a chance to be with you and decides to make his current dream a reality.

"Soobin and y/n you'll be our first lucky pairing of the night. Now would one of you pick your dare and show it to me please?" he looks at you coyly, a giant smirk plastered in his face.

"oh yeah, not obvious at all Choi... your wing man can't even wait a couple rounds before throwing us in" you tease elbowing him in the ribs. Soobin however is death glaring Beomgyu and so is every other female in the room. You can feel the words thrown at and about you but honestly can't find a fuck to give. If anything it was hilarious just how desperate they all were for 7 minutes 1 minute of Soobin's attention. You walk up and pull out your dare. Surprise and smugness fills you as you read it. Passing it to Beomgyu to read, his jaw slightly drops open and then tells that proof will be required to say it was completed. "and what kind of proof is that?" Soobin asks, still clueless to the dare. "ummm, a photo, video...clothing....? you can figure it out! OFF YOU GO!" he pushes at your shoulders to guide you towards the room.

Of course this frat has a whole Bedroom dedicated to shit like this. No, not a closet for the sacred game of 7 minutes in heaven, but a fully equipped room, bed and all.

"oh wow.... romantic'' you remark sarcastically

"Sorry I know… but if it makes you feel any better those sheets are clean..."

"and how would you know they're clean? What if someones already been in here tonight."

Scratching the back of his neck, Soobin looks away from you and says "well because, this is my room..."

"oh... OH"

"sorry, it's not what you think but I'd rather bring you in here than that actual room.. plus we can just talk or whatever you feel like doing"

"oh no President Choi... you have a dare to complete. Can't let your frat bros know you failed can we?" you feign offense with sarcasm and a wink.

"What was the dare anyways?"

"To eat me out" you say flatly

"WHAT?! let me see" he slightly panics and holds his hand out for the paper.

“ is it really that unbelievable? it's your game after all..."

"god I'm sorry, seriously we don't have to do any-"

"Wait, so you're not even gonna try?” you taunt “really? what will you "brothers" say?"air quoting brothers.

"honestly it doesn't matter what they think I'm just enjoying my time with you" he says immediately and you can't help the little butterflies that sprout in your stomach

"You're not even gonna try?" you tease "I thought I was finally gonna get to see what all the hype was about. I mean all I hear about is how good your dick is but I've never heard anything about your head game... makes me wonder"

Licking his lower lip he chuckles at your taunt "I'm great at eating pussy to Y/n. Reaally goood" slowly drawing out the last words

"guess you'll have to prove it" you squint to emphasize it "but it won't be that easy... if you can get me all hot and bothered without getting between my legs for 7 minutes, maybe I'll let you have a taste.." biting your bottom lip you move in closer to grab his shirt "what'd ya say Choi? you gonna show me what you’ve really got?" pulling him down closer to your face

"What's the rules?" he breathes out the words heavily "what can and can't I do?"

"anything from the waist up is fair game, just nothing between my thighs"

"Can I stand between them though?"

"mmmhmmm just no rubbing your cock against me" looking up into his eyes, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth.

Soobin lets a grunt leave his chest from your words. Picking you up by your thighs, Soobin walks you over to his desk, wrapping your legs around his waist "starting now" he rushes the words before crashing his lips against yours. You open up to him immediately, wanting it just as much as he does. You do however have to play a little hard to get. His tongue fights yours for dominance. Winning rather quickly, and explores every crevice of your mouth.

The kiss is so fucking good, too good, you want to give in right away and he's not even touching you yet. Like not at all. His hands are planted on his desk next to your thighs and you want to whine from his lack of touch. You want him to ravish you, and give in, breaking the one rule you gave him. But god, he was good even without trying. He starts to drift his lips from yours and down your neck, kissing, sucking and leaving marks you know will be there tomorrow but you can't even care as he runs his tongue over each one to soothe the ache.

Unable to hold it back any longer a whine slips from your lips and you hate yourself for it.

chucking into your neck "ahhh needy already bunny? You want me to touch you?"

but being the stubborn bitch you are, you shook your head "nope, don't care...don't care if you touch meeEE-" your voice gets higher as his fingers lightly trace their way up your stomach to the hem of your shirt.

"oh, really... so if i-" removing his fingers from your rib cage and you whine again, not even caring anymore "liar" he laughs again, coming back to your lips. "you ready yet princess or you really gonna play it out?"

"donno what yer talkin' 'bout" you pant against his lips "'m fine"

"that so?" he pulls away from you looking straight into your eyes, knowing he's winning this game. "fine..." his finger traces back up your ribs under your shirt, your breath hitching in your throat as he rubs along the band of your bra. Sliding his fingers around until he reaches the clasps "so this is fine then? you're okay" not breaking eye contact once

'mmmhhhm 's fine" you whine in anticipation for him to snap it off you. you want it off so bad, want him all over you now.

tracing his fingers underneath the clasp and up your spine you instinctively arch your back into him, looking up into his eyes even more so now, no longer breathing as his lips graze yours as he coos “too bad, thought I was getting somewhere with you” he pulls away, fingers ghosting your spine as he pulls away.

“Nnnooo” you whine at the loss of his touch and pull him back in by the front of his shirt, locking your legs around his waist so he can’t escape again.

“Thought you were good Y/N?” He smirks into your kiss

“Fuck Soobin if you don’t take my shirt off right now I swear to god-”

“No problem bunny” pulling away and discarding your shirt in a split second before he’s back on your lips. Hands on your back, at the clasp of your bra. “This to or?” Your bra is snapped off before you can even finish nodding

“christ, You really are a fuckboy”

“Don’t say that” he pouts onto your lips, leaving a quick peck.

“Why it’s fucking true. You had my clothes off in two seconds”

He can’t help the chuckle that escapes his lips “I have some… experience..” he trails off attaching himself to your collarbone

“Yeah, yeah,,. “

Soobin pulls back to study you, looking over every part of your now exposed chest. “God you're beautiful…” massaging your breasts as he works his eyes down to your nipples. Noticing the flash of silver on them, muttering “fuck”under his breath, lowering to be eyelevel with your pierced nipples encased in a skeleton heart. He can feel his cock throb at the sight. Licking his lips before attaching himself to your breast flicking at the jewelry clad bud. Hissing at the sensitivity that shoots through it.

“You’re a boob guy I take it?” panting through his assault on your nipple.

“Mmhhmmm and yours are perfect baby. So so pretty” kitten licking at the bud

“Uughhaaa-you like the piercings then” raking your fingers through his hair, slightly pulling when he nips on the ring.

“So fucking sexy.. Love ‘em” switching to the other bud to share his infatuation with them.

Soobin loved feeling the cold metal against his tongue, contrasting to the heat from your aroused nipple. His cock growing harder by the second from the noises you release as he has his way with your chest. “Yer full of surprises y/n”

“Ahhaha- you think?”

He leaves your chest to return back to your neck. Gently asking against your skin “You gonna give in now or are you gonna keep up this hard act?”

Gripping the hem of his shirt you pull it up, where he finishes taking it off “what do you think?”

“Need to hear you say it bunny, say you want it.” he holds your chin to look up at him, pausing all the previous activities until you say it.

“You’re a dick you know that?”

“Am I? Or are you being a brat?” he smirks knowing he’s got you

“Fuck…I want you” you whisper “want you Soobin”

“What do you want Y/N? Ask nicely”

“Pleaseeee” you mewl “want you, want your tongue on me”

“Be specific bunny”

Groaning you finally say what he wants to hear as you do so “Eat. My. Pussy.” punctuating each word as you slowly guide his hand from your waist down to cup your throbbing mound.

[ofmermaidstories]

hi merms, i hope you’re doing great. i’m sorry if this is different from your usual asks but i wanted to ask you, since you are literally blog goals, but how can i be more like you and enjoy my own blog? i love how you’re so free in your own space and express yourself, and you’re just full of happiness and all the bright, good things. going to your blog always makes me smile. its like you spread joy and warmth so easily. is it weird i feel more at home with your blog 😭 i wish i could enjoy my blog too, but sometimes drama makes the experience un-fun, like mean anons, or worse, your own readers constantly putting you in weird competition with your own writer friends over things you and your friends never even noticed before. i know the easy answer is to just ignore the haters and enjoy writing, and i really love writing, but its hard sometimes. i wish i could make my blog feel as homey as yours. visiting your page is like comin home to fresh hot chocolate after a long day of work 💐 thats all luv, sending you lots of love always 🌸

oh anon. i’m sorry. 🥺 i am sitting with you and we will piece this out together though, okay? 🧩 it’s hard! i’ve actually been feeling kind of dejected, lately, like with tumblr in general and my usage of it—because i haven’t been using it like i used to! so i guess that’s the first thing: to figure out what you want out of it, and then figure out what it takes to make it happen. for me i enjoy this place most when i’m treating it like a scrapbook: quotes or pictures that inspire me, asks, things i doodle. the pros of that: you fill your space with stuff you love, or that means something to you! the cons: it can be a little isolating if the stuff you love, or the things that mean something to you, aren’t like… current writing or posting trends, lmao. but it all just depends on what you value! 🥺 i’m not a fast writer, and tend to favour long-term projects, so while it sometimes makes me sad when i fall out of the loop of things, ultimately i just accept (or try to) that that’s how i work in this space. 🥹 as mama cass said, sometimes you just gotta make your own kinda music.

drama makes everything boring! and tbh i think my biggest cheat with that is that i only follow a relatively small amount of x reader blogs. 🥹 that’s not intentional; i curate a pretty strict feed based on my other interests, though, so there ends up being a lot of competition for my attention. 🥺 the pros of this is that i tend to miss most discourse that happens (lmao). the con is that i tend to miss everything else, too, though. 🥹 you basically have to choose whichever bothers you less lmfaooo. and even then—drama or meanness or plain old weirdness will still find it’s way to you. 🥺 i think that’s just the unforch reality of being on social media. especially in a niche that’s so… driven by something as personal as literally self-inserting, and dependant on the validation of others. 🥺 i’m sorry people have made you feel like you’re in competition with your friends! it sucks, because i think we as writers like… live in our own heads, lmao. we know so much about the worlds and characters we’re trying to write. but people outside of our heads don’t—think the same way! 🥺 they will draw comparisons where maybe we don’t want them to. 🥺 i think that’s a natural response, tbh; especially if they love something, and see work with like, a similar theme or tropes, but despite it being a compliment it doesn’t always feel great. 🥹 i guess the only advice (and reminder, for myself) i can offer is that you and your friends aren’t in competition—but rather thrown into the same maze together. 🥺 the only way out is to hold hands to make sure none of you get lost, and walk through. 🥹

anon!!! 🥺 i hope you find a way to make your blog feel more homely. you’re always welcome here—the door’s always open for the sunlight and the bees—but i want you to feel like the important part of the neighbourhood you are! 🥺 and safe enough that you can leave your door open, too. 🪟🎐🌾

[sappho-shalom]

CONVERSION UPDATE ?!

Long time no see!!! So I think in my last update I said I was considering enrolling in college and guess what? I did! It's just community college and I'm doing it part time and I'm not entirely sure what subject I want to focus on, but I'm a few weeks into it and so far it's been going well. I also got a job which is great because I've needed one for awhile lol. Also, re: sims 4 jewish cc, I never was able to get sims4studio to work (I consulted many forums) so I don't think that's happening anytime soon sorry!!

But anyways, what everyone is here for: conversion updates! I've started studying with a partner, she's older than me and is marrying into a Jewish family so she's a little more knowledgeable about certain things compared to me, but it's still cool to have a partner and she’s really nice! I think the first time we met together with the rabbi we were discussing the Akedah and he asked us why we thought G-d would command Abraham to do something like that, and I had just finished my first watch of Good Omens season 2 so I pulled out some references to the Book of Job and he seemed very impressed with me LMAO.

But more importantly: I've finally been to services! My first service was Rosh Hashanah so, to quote my rabbi, I was kind of thrown into the deep end LOL. I was a little anxious (although less than I thought I would be) and it was kind of awkward when everyone but me kissed the Torah (and of course everyone was watching bc I guess you face the Torah when it’s carried around the room? I learn new things everyday!), but I really enjoyed it!! I was worried I was going to get bored or something (it was a 3 hour long service) but I ended up adulting for my mom who kept asking when we could go home lol. I also went to the Kol Nidrei service which was nice, there were way more people!! I also got to take home a tzedakah box (except it only takes coins and this is the 21st century so I never have coins LOL). OH and last week I got to light Shabbat candles for the first time!!!! But not really, it was Thursday and we were just practicing (and I butchered the Hebrew). BUT I did ask the rabbi and he said I could start lighting Shabbat candles myself!!!! I'm genuinely so happy and excited about it.

The synagogue also has services for Sukkot and their own sukkah which I wanted to go to but the first one was a potluck (I hate cooking) and I almost went to the second one because they had pizza but then I found out that we had to pay for an entire pizza ourselves ?!?! I don't have money for that LOL. (Okay that sounds a little mean lol, I was just expecting it to be like everyone chips in $5-10 and there are enough pizzas ordered for everyone to get 1-2 slices, not $14 for your very own pizza!!)

I've been working Friday nights a lot but I finally worked up the courage to talk to my manager so after this week I'll be free on Shabbat evenings and hopefully go to Shabbat services (or just just spend it at home LIGHTING MY OWN SHABBAT CANDLES BC THATS SOMETHING I CAN DO NOW?!?!?!)! Sorry if this post is a little all over the place or there's too many exclamation marks, I'm genuinely just so excited. It really feels like studying is starting to ramp up, although that probably has something to do with all the High Holidays lol. Anyways, I think that's it!

Chag sameach!

[krysmiss]

My Gallavich Intro

Thanks for putting this together @callivich ! 😊 Name: Krystal

Age: 29

What made you fall in love with Gallavich?

I love how they continued to persevere and make their ways back to each other. Most people in their circumstance(s) would have given up on each other and the idea of ever being together and happy but they loved each other enough to never give up, despite the universe telling them that they should. They knew that they were each other's soulmates so they clawed their ways through the many (many) obstacles that came their way and fought to make it work. Now they're together, married and happy and that'll always make me happy. 🥹🥰

How long have you been a fan? Since May of 2023. Very newly obsessed.

Favourite Gallavich moment/scene? There's a lot of Gallavich moments that I absolutely love but I'll try to narrow it down to just 3, in no particular order:

In season 1 when Monica shows up for the first time. The first thing Ian did was run to the Milkovich house to see and talk to Mickey. Though Mickey was hesitant to talk to Ian at the moment (because Terry was there), Mickey showed that he cared about Ian by agreeing to meet Ian at the Kash and Grab to make sure he was okay. That moment, even though it is so early in the series, showed how much they cared for each other already. Mickey being the first person on Ian's mind in a moment of distress, and Mickey dropping everything to make sure Ian was alright is a moment that's so special to me. They were so young and had feelings for each other that neither of them probably couldn't really explain if they tried to at the time, but they both knew that there was something more there. Mickey also already knowing Ian's work schedule makes me smile like a giddy little idiot every time lol 🥰

The "sorry I'm late..." moment 🥹💞. Even though Mickey had his own shit to work though with Ian's diagnosis, him still showing up for Ian and letting him know that he wasn't going anywhere despite it all was so fucking sweet and I love it.

The prison reunion. Nothing says true love like getting yourself thrown into prison and giving up your freedom because you found out that the person you love is going to prison and you want to be with them, regardless of the circumstances.

Favourite Shameless character apart from Ian and Mickey? Kev and Sheila

Do you write or draw or make edits? I don't - I'm not talented enough for that lol. I do enjoy seeing, reading and supporting everyone else's art and fics though!

Favourite type of Gallavich fics? I usually go for one shot post canon or canon compliant fics, usually full of fluff and/or smut, though I'm not opposed to multi-chapter ones. I love reading post-canon fics about married Ian and Mickey being understanding and taking care of each other as they both continue to work though their shit. Mickey always knowing what his husband needs and taking care of him, even when Ian doesn't ask him to, or Ian always reassuring his husband and letting him work though his own trauma always tugs at my heart strings 😭. I also don't mind reading fics that include the rest of the family. I want to eventually venture out to reading maybe some AU fics at some point though.

Favourite Gallavich quote? Idk if I can choose just one so here's my top 3 - again in no particular order:

Their vows 🥰. Everytime I think about their vows, I think of a headcanon that someone wrote on here (don't remember exactly who at the moment, sorry!) talking about how they each emphasized a different word in their vows and how accurate and on brand it was for them. I get the warm fuzzies everytime.

"Ian, what you and I have makes me free. Not what these assholes know."

"I can take care of him, okay? Let me take care of him til he's better... We're taking care of him here. You, me, us. His fucking family."

Anything else you’d like to share about yourself? I first started watching Shameless at the beginning of May of 2023 (after being told for years that I should watch it and continuously putting it off - kicking myself now) and as of mid July, I've watch it a total of 4 times. So when I post or reblog something saying that I'm obsessed, I truly mean obsessed. I have never loved or cared for individual characters or a couple from a TV series or movie as much as I do Ian Gallagher and Mickey Milkovich.

[numbknee]

omg more kyman headcanons please, your last ones were *chef’s kiss*

aaaaaa I am SO SORRY I completely missed this ask so apologies if this is a million years late 😭🙏

but alas....I do have many kyman headcanons rattling around in my brain (and a lot of them are displayed in my fics so this is a shameless plug to read those lol...also a lot of this is very horny so I apologize in advance)

when kyle and cartman finally get together, a lot of their external dynamic doesn't really change that much. I adore this post by sludgescribble because it perfectly exemplifies how I see established relationship kyman: arguing until the cows come home but still holding hands. still being huge fuckin idiots, still obsessed with each other, still very much in love

I like the idea of kyle going into counseling or something else psychology-related because of the post-covid specials (and also i'm a psychology ho), but I can't for the life of me imagine an actual career that cartman would settle on.

I would think cartman would be the type to do odd-jobs for his whole life, never settling on one thing but jumping around from place-to-place where he thinks he would make the most money in the quickest amount of time possible, maybe running a drug ring or a dog-fighting circuit or whatever before moving on to the next thing. either that.... or he just becomes a fuckin rabbi lmao. I totally lost my shit at that in the post-covid episode because it was the COMPLETE fucking opposite of what I (and I'm sure a lot of other viewers) expected from him. but leave it to cartman to keep us on our toes every goddamn step of the way. also I'm sorry but rich CEO cartman just doesn't do it for me. he needs to be in a position of power, but simultaneously that position needs to be... kind of lame and unconventional.... like a mall cop or some shit. hahahaha

(now onto shmekshy stuff again I'M SORRY) kyle takes a while to admit to himself how much he's physically attracted to cartman because... denial and conventional beauty standards are strong forces to be reckoned with. but once he does, he's fuckin OBSESSED. all of cartman's thick, muss-able hair, his deceptively cute and innocent-looking face and huge brown puppy-dog eyes, every curve and swell of soft flesh on cartman's body... kyle goes FUCKING INSANE whenever they get intimate because he's subconsciously making up for all the time he missed being in denial lol. also he's more similar to his dad than he likes to admit: he likes his lovers strong-willed and chubby... lmaooooo

I may have implied this before but cartman is actually a HUUUUGE masochist. he's shown to have some sadistic tendencies in the show (see all of ginger cow) but the underlying vibe I get is that his performative sadism is a huge cope for what he ACTUALLY wants, because we've been shown that he gets off of being taken advantage of (i'm SO SORRY for that link) which.... is kind of fucked up but hey kinks are like that sometimes. and god knows this kid has an insanely fucked-up relationship to sex in general (which I also wrote a fic about lol. also kyle is a sadist in denial too LOOOOOL)

they end up doing A LOT of shit together throughout the course of their relationship. they travel the world. they stop the world from exploding a few times. they nearly kill each other on several occasions. they save each other's lives on even more occasions. they go to other planets because eventually the tom-fuckery of their hometown becomes too much to be self-contained. they somehow destroy reality but end up stitching it whole again at the same time. and through it all.... they stay together. because they both know deep down that they simply cannot live in a world without the other. they are irrevocably intertwined. think that quote of stephen colbert talking about his wife but like slightly more fucked up and with a few poop jokes thrown in

[vampyrsutton]

Breakfast Food and Whiskey

Summary:

When Sakusa and Atsumu' bickering gets them kicked out of practice, they're forced to finally face their past.

Ao3 Tags:

Non-Traditional Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Alpha, Alpha Sakusa Kiyoomi, Alpha Miya Atsumu, Homophobia, In Omegaverse Terms, Sakusa Kiyoomi is Bad at Feelings, I Accidentally Gave Him Trauma, Past Relationship(s), Getting Back Together, Miscommunication, Post-Time Skip, Angst and Hurt/Comfort

Notes:

For SakuAtsu Omegaverse Week 2023!

Trope: Non-Traditional Quote: Is this really a good idea?

"Knothead!"

"Asshole!"

"Jack ass!"

"Bi-"

"Enough!"

Both alphas freeze as their coach yells at them to separate from where they didn't even realize they were once again getting in each other's faces.

"The fuck happened now?!" Coach Foster yells at them.

"Miya's shitty set was too high!"

"Omi-Omi isn't payin' any fuckin' attention!"

"Shut up!" The older beta yells over them when they start snarling at each other. "I swear to god if I have to treat you like children and stick you in a 'Get Along Jersey' I will!"

"He started it!" They both scoff like the children they were just accused of being.

"Fucking, alphas." Coach mutters. "And I'm finishing it! Are you two nearing ruts or something?! Grow up and act like professionals or get the fuck off my court! In fact, you’re both done for the day! Hit the showers, go back to the dorms, and work it out or I'm benching both of you!"

Both alphas open their mouths to protest, before slumping at their coach's next words.

"Nope! Shut up! Go!" They're ordered, prompting them to trudge towards the locker rooms, still bickering. "Did I not just say shut up?!"

"Sorry!" They groan back, glaring at each other when it happens to be in unison.

Truth be told, they didn't actually hate each other nearly as much as they claimed. In fact, at one point, they had even been courting, though neither had actually realized it.

They had even been gathering the courage to ask each other out when Sakusa presented alpha days after turning 17 and Komori texted Atsumu to let him know about the new alpha rampaging to try to find him. Atsumu had been both flattered and concerned but spent the next several months properly courting the alpha in ways typical to an omega after assuming that's what he would be if his Omi-Omi was an alpha.

He was not an omega.

Unfortunately not even a beta.

No, weeks before turning 18, Atsumu fills the Inarizaki gym with a strong scent of star anise and fresh lavender that would almost say omega if it weren't for the bite of the freshness and that he started to rampage in an alpha hormone-fueled quest for Omi before he ended up tranqued, dragged home by 'Samu and Suna, and thrown into their room with some rut aids for a few days to get his shit together.

By the time he was let out of the room, he'd had a few patches of lucidity to think things through and figure out his next step. He had grown up taught that it was Alphas and Omegas that go together, but he had also known that wasn't true based because of 'Samu and Suna being Alpha and Beta. They even added Komori recently which had increased some extended family's bullshit about needing an omega, but even Atsumu could see they were just fuckin' saps.

With this thought in mind, Atsumu had decided he would still give dating Sakusa a try.

Now if only Sakusa had shared the same thoughts.

"Omi-Omi! Wait! Please! We can work this out, just please give me a chance!" Atsumu had pleaded as he held the other alpha's wrist so he couldn't flee.

He'd been pretty sure he could see pain in those dark eyes, but with Sakusa's expensive ass scent patches, he couldn't entirely tell which somehow made it hurt worse.

"I'm sorry 'Tsu-Miya." Sakusa said flatly, breaking Atsumu's heartbreak further with the revoking of his nickname. "I can't. We're both alpha's. It would be…unnatural…" He sounded like he was reading off a script but Atsumu was too busy spiraling to notice. Sakusa took a shaky breath. "It would be disgusting."

That final statement had been like a slap to the face, but Atsumu's pretty sure that would have hurt less. "Om-"

"Good bye, 'Tsu-Miya." Sakusa monotones in a way Atsumu hadn't heard since meeting him first year. "I'll see you on the other side of the court."

Little did they know that they'd end up on the same side just a few years later, after matching alpha drops, multiple painful ruts, several failed relationships, and a lot of hard feelings that would result in them constantly being at each other's throats when they meet again.

"Dammit!" Atsumu yells as he slams his locker closed after grabbing his towel. "We're fuckin' adults! Why is it still so fuckin' hard for us ta not be assholes ta each other?! It's been like what? Five years?"

"Speak for yourself, Miya. You're the one stinking up the place with your challenging scent. I'm just returning the favor." Sakusa huffs, as he gets his jersey off. For someone so distant, he surprisingly had no trouble just being naked around them all.

Atsumu furrows his brow as he sniffs his wrist before dragging his hand against his main gland to do the same. "I am?"

Sakusa looks at him like he's stupid and Atsumu tries not to snap in response. "Yes, you idiot. It's been five years and you still can't control your fucking scent?"

Atsumu's eye twitches, but his desire to not get benched is greater than his desire to snarl at the other. "Okay, well I don't smell it obviously so when did ya start smellin' it?"

Sakusa huffs, but thinks about it. "…After reuniting? When I was dragged out for the Welcome Party, you were tipsy and started pouring out a fiery cinnamon scent and kept staring at me like you wanted to rip my throat out which obviously pissed off my alpha. I tried to be professional and unbothered as usual but you insisted on being in my space and trying to drown me with it so I started returning the energy."

Atsumu blinks slowly before flushing down past the hem of his sweat-soaked jersey. "Ya said cinnamon?"

Sakusa raises an eyebrow but nods slowly.

"Like French toast cinnamon or Fireball whiskey cinnamon?" Atsumu has to clarify, hoping his voice doesn't convey his horror.

"Usually starts as French toast then morphs into whiskey when we start fighting?" The eyebrow inches higher. "Why?"

Atsumu has to hold back a pup-like whine before he rushes to the shower. "No reason. I'll be more careful. Just know I haven't been challengin' ya. See ya tomorrow!"

The eyebrow drifts back down to pinch with the other as Sakusa frowns. "See you tomorrow?" He mumbles back, wondering not only what the other alpha is hiding, but also if Miya forgot they'd see each other getting out of the shower.

They wouldn't see each other after their showers.

In fact, Sakusa would barely see the setter off the court as he seemed to appear and vanish into thin air outside of that. Sure it meant they weren't fighting, Atsumu only offering Sakusa the bare minimum in terms of conversation and practice notes, but Sakusa had also wanted to actually solve the problem and this felt…it felt wrong.

It brought back feelings he thought he had worked past after his parents had forced him to break it off with the alpha before it could even begin under threat of disownment. He's since gone no contact with them the second his college was paid off, and a part of him had hoped maybe he and Atsumu could work it out, but then his nose had been assaulted with biting cinnamon and crushed hopes.

At first, it had been a softer breakfast food scent, but then the look in Atsumu's eyes had made his hackles raise and it soon shifted to a sharper cinnamon that brought back bad choices from college, and they'd been hostile ever since.

The lack of Atsumu was somehow worse.

He didn't know what to do though.

He had never saved the blonde's new number after joining, he wasn't in the group chats, fuck he didn't even know what dorm was his.

His distress must have been soaking through his patches because Hinata ends up approaching him in the locker room with a look of concern.

"Are you okay, 'Kusa?" The little ginger omega frowns, his sweeter orange creamsicle scent being soured by his worry for his teammates. "Both you and 'Tsum-'Tsum have seemed really out of it since Coach sent you home last week."

Sakusa scowls into his locker, but apparently can't hide the dejected slump of his shoulders or the souring of his scent that he hadn't covered yet because Hinata whines, and Sakusa flinches at the sound.

He's always hated omega sounds. Sure, no one likes distressed omegas, but he couldn't really stand the normal ones either. It had been his first hint when he had started trying to forget about Atsumu in college and started dating around. He knew he was many people's idea of an ideal alpha, and had the hoards of omegas throwing themselves at him to prove it and he tried to like them. He really did, but when their sounds pissed him off and their scents made him gag, he finally had to come to terms with the fact he was not attracted to omegas. He had tried female betas after that, knowing that his parents expected more heirs despite his siblings already having pups, but then he had to come to terms with not liking vagina, and if that wasn't a whole breakdown to Komori as he was forced to come to terms with how badly he fucked up with Atsumu and dammit Toya I miss him so much.

"And you wondered why your parents have been all but exiled from the family." Komori had sighed as he let his clean linen air freshener and fruit cocktail scent out to try to calm the panicking alpha down and drown out the scent of rotting wood. "What do you think the old farts did when I started dating his brother and Rin? They wanted me to either break up their relationship so we'd be in a proper one or I was a disgrace of an omega. Forget that this was the norm for millennia." He sighed heavily now. "Your parents are pricks, and Atsumu had been the best thing that ever happened to you but they used fear to stomp all over that because of some bullshit view of right and wrong."

"And heirs." Sakusa mumbled into his cousin's shoulder.

"Yeah, and that." Komori huffs. "Do you even want kids? I've seen how you are when you get sick. You'd probably stop functioning if you had to deal with a diaper."

Sakusa made a face, shaking his head. "I'm probably not even going to associate with your's until they're like 12."

"Rude, but I should've expected it." Komori snorted, shaking his head in exasperation. "Point it, so you like alphas. Big fucking deal. You've always liked a challenge. Why are you backing down?"

"'Cause he probably hates me after how things ended." Sakusa mumbled, slumping further.

Komori made a face, contemplating if he should tell Sakusa what he knows and ultimately sighing. "He's…He's definitely bitter. Your rejection made him drop, and 'Samu said he came out of it an even bigger bastard but that could just be twin talk. It's been years though and you've both had time. Make friends again at least? You're about to be on the same team after all."

A suffering noise left Sakusa as he prayed for the floor to swallow him, even if it would only put him in the living room and facing someone who looks exactly like his first love. "Can't I just take your Miya up on his offer to spike a volleyball through my head? That sounds less painful."

"Nope. He'd probably weigh it down with lead or something and then you'd die before you had a chance to get your shit together." Komori smirked.

"That would be the point, yes." Sakusa huffed, pushing his cousin away now to pout.

"Just think about it, okay?"

He had.

Sakusa had thought about it non-stop the entire month leading up to him joining the Jackals and had steeled himself to apologize before whatever heart he had managed to salvage from the first time breaks all over again when he was met with what he perceived as animosity.

So he did what he does best when he's hurt.

He lashed out.

And now Sakusa almost wishes he had been benched so long as Atsumu wouldn't be avoiding him.

"I'm fine." Sakusa lies to Hinata, sighing when the omega's nose scrunches.

"You sure? 'Cause you smell awful and 'Tsum-'Tsum isn't doing any better." Hinata frowns. "I try not to pry, but you both smell like you'll drop any minute now."

Sakusa's eyes snap up in horror, not thinking he's doing that bad, but knowing that would be devastating for Atsumu who already suffered one before he even got to finish presenting.

"What?" Sakusa chokes out.

"Your scents are both rotten. Every note of them." Hinata explains. "What happened after you guys were sent home?"

"How close does Miya smell?" Sakusa asks instead of answering, already shoving things in his bag.

Hinata's face scrunches in concern. "Like stubbing his toe is going to make him fall apart? Why?"

"Because he's already dropped once barely five years ago before he even finished presenting. It was my fault then and I don't know what I did this time, but I'm not about to let it happen again." Sakusa rushes out as he slams his locker, not bothering with patches and barely managing to get a shirt back on. "What dorm is his? I have to fix this. I can't lose him again."

Orange eyes widen in horror. "What?! Why did he- not important. I'll bully it out of him later. He claimed room 10 on the second floor." Hinata's eyes narrow now as he blocks Sakusa's retreat. "Break him, and I do the freak quick to your head. Understand?"

Sakusa growls at being blocked from who his alpha still considers his mate, but nods. "I'll provide the ball. Now move ."

He doesn't mean for the Command to slip in there, and he'll apologize later, but right now, he needs to check on Atsumu so wastes no further time in booking it out of there.

It finally registers to him that 10 was his high school jersey number when he's faced with it once more, but he doesn't have time to dwell on it as he bangs on the door.

"Miya! Open up, dammit! You're worrying the team and Hinata says you smell like you're going to drop! Let me in so I can fix whatever I fucked up this time!" Sakusa yells as soon as he hears shuffling inside, before cursing when there's a squeak and a thud. "Don't make me force open the door! Miya-fuck 'Tsumu, please!"

Something in his voice must give away his desperation as a gold eye suddenly peaks through the cracked open door.

"You called me, 'Tsumu…"

Sakusa winces, drawing in on himself at the unknown, but strong emotion in the setter's visible expression. "Sorry, I shouldn't have-"

"Ya should have never stopped ta begin with." Atsumu huffs and the pout on his face reminds Sakusa why they ever thought he could be an omega. "What do ya want, Om- Sakusa? I'm tired."

Sakusa reels as though he had been smacked by Ushijima and makes a pained noise. "Don't. Fuck, don't ever say my name. It sounds so wrong."

Atsumu's eyebrows furrow. "Ya hate Omi-Omi though?"

"I hated the emotions connected to it, but my name is so much worse." Sakusa grimaces.

Atsumu just looks exhausted as he sighs. "What do ya want, Omi."

Sakusa frowns at the incomplete name but sighs. "I told you. Hinata said you smelled like you were close to dropping, and I heard about the first one that happened before you were even done presenting. There's no way you can handle a second one within the same decade. …I came to help. I don't know what I did this time, but I'd probably follow you if I made you drop again." He mumbles near the end as he looks at the ground, choosing not to mention his own drop from years ago.

"Fuckin' omega noses." Atsumu mutters as he sighs. "I'm fine, Omi. Why do ya even care? Ya didn't the first time."

Sakusa's brow furrows as he looks back up at bitter gold. "I didn't hear about the first one until a month before I joined. You think I'd just let you drop?"

It's Atsumu's turn to look confused. "The fuck do ya mean you just hearda it? 'Samu went all the way ta yer house ta throttle ya fer it?"

Dark eyes widen now. " That's what that yelling was?! My parents just said he was pissed I technically broke up with you! I didn't even get to talk to him!"

Atsumu's eyes widen in turn as he finally opens the door to talk to Sakusa properly and fuck he looks like hell. "He said they said ya didn't care an' ya said ta leave. Had no need fer broken alphas in yer life."

Sakusa snarls, eyes narrowing as things start to piece together. "Did you try texting or calling me at all?"

"Had ta have been hundreds a' times." Atsumu frowns.

Sakusa huffs, digging his phone out of his bag and pulling up a contact he couldn't bear to delete. "What's your phone number, Miya?" The growl building in his throat becoming audible as it matches the old contact. "You never changed it."

"Why the hell would I?" Atsumu scoffs, the cinnamon in his scent gaining a whiskey bite with his increasing confusion.

"I never wanted to leave you, 'Tsu- no I don't have the right to call you that-Miya. My parents are old-school conservatives who insist mating and love is between an Alpha and an Omega or any combination that can produce offspring. They were all for it when we thought you'd be an omega, but the second you presented otherwise, it was stop seeing you or be disowned." The growl grows louder. "I was 17, and couldn't afford to be kicked out and was too panicked to think to ask any family or friends to take me in despite multiple offering when they found out what my parents had done." He turns the phone so Atsumu can watch him press call and it goes straight to unavailable. "It seems they were determined to make sure I wouldn't stray, but I haven't talked to them since I graduated college and am shocked I'm even still on their plan, but the least they can do after the emotional hell they put me through is pay my damn phone." A frustrated huff. "I never wanted to hurt you, Miya."

Atsumu's eyes were saucers as he let Sakusa talk before they finally narrow and his own growl joins Sakusa's. "I got that bitch good chocolates fer her birthday, what the fuck?!"

Sakusa nods, dropping his phone back in his bag. "I didn't even get to see Komori again until I went to college after he got with your brother and Suna."

Atsumu snarls as he whips out his phone and starts texting rapidly.

"What are you doing, Miya?"

"Texting yer cousin fer yer parent's numbers so I can give 'em an earful!" Atsumu growls. "I can't fuckin' believe they did that ta ya!"

"To- what? To me ?!" Sakusa scoffs as he snatches the other alpha's phone before he can give his parents an actual reason to hate him. "Miya, you dropped because of me being a coward! What the hell do you mean?!"

"Ya just said ya would've stayed if it weren't fer 'em so really it's their fault that I dropped." Atsumu huffs as he tries to get his phone back, pouting when the spiker drops it into his bag.

"Anyone ever tell you you worry too much about others?" Sakusa asks with a raised eyebrow.

"Constantly." Atsumu shrugs with a roll of his eyes before smiling fondly. "Been a while since I've heard it from ya though. …I missed it."

Sakusa chooses to ignore his face heating as he huffs. "Want to explain what this one was about then?" He asks, trying to get them back on track and curious when Atsumu's face flushes as well.

"Need ya ta answer one more thing 'bout the last topic before I answer that." Atsumu mumbles shyly.

Twin moles inch into dark curls, but Sakusa still nods. "Okay?"

"…How do ya feel now?" Atsumu asks, toeing at his welcome mat. "Did ya actually think I was disgusting?"

Sakusa's eyes darken at the very thought. "I was just parroting them. I loved you but was stupid and scared and convinced I was broken so I listened to the people who were supposed to protect me. I listened clear up until I went to college and could try getting over you, but I can't stand omega's and apparently don't like women so had an entire breakdown to Komori when I realized just how much I had fucked up." He groans as he runs a hand down his face. "…I was going to try to at least befriend you again when I joined the Jackals, but then the postering shit happened at the bar and I was devastated so lashed out back."

Atsumu has a goofy smile on his face but quickly flinches at the end. "Yup. There it is. …So the French toast cinnamon?" He starts awkwardly. "That's my rut/arousal scent. I was starin' at ya like that because I was drunk an' yer still stupidly hot an' I didn't even realize I had been starin' until the rotten mahogany added ta yer scent an' I thought ya still hated me, but now I know it was ya misinterpretin' me bein' a simp, but I didn't know that part until just now so I thought it was leftover hatred an' ya also hatin' my scent an' it felt like a second rejection." He explains as he slumps. "Basically, my alpha took a hit bein' rejected so soon after presentin' an' is extra sensitive ta rejection so when we thought ya hated even our scent, we kinda spiraled again."

Sakusa blinks before sighing heavily. "So we're both idiots?"

"Fer a while, yeah." Atsumu chuckles tiredly.

Sakusa can't help his own tired chuckle as he for once in his life makes the first move by pulling Atsumu through the door and into a hug. "Can I start making it up to you, Miya?"

"If ya stop callin' me Miya, yeah." Atsumu smiles into the spiker's broad shoulder as he takes in the orange and clean linen that he hadn't gotten to properly appreciate the first time. "Missed hearin' ya call me 'Tsumu."

"…I really don't think I have the rig-"

"I will shut the door in yer face right the fuck now." Atsumu growls despite holding the other alpha tighter.

Sakusa can't help but snort. "How did we ever think you could be an omega?"

"Young, dumb, an' in love." Atsumu shrugs as he smothers Sakusa in his scent of star anise and lavender before pulling back to drag Sakusa into his dorm. "Now come on. Hinata was right that I'm close ta a drop, so yer helping with prevention this time."

Sakusa's eyes widen as he's dragged in and he bites back a snarl when a much more sour cinnamon assaults his nose once inside. "Is this really a good idea? Shouldn't you call your brother or packmates or something? Not the cause of the drop?"

"First a' all," Atsumu starts as he takes off his now happy-smelling shirt so Sakusa can cover his nose. "I don't care how much we thought we hated each other, my alpha never stopped considerin' ya pack. Secondly," He drags him into his room now and opens the window to start airing out the depression stench much to Sakusa's relief, "the drop is from what my alpha thought was a rejection. What better way to fix that than showing him you didn't." He nods as he hops onto his mess of a bed and holds out his arms. "Now get down here."

Sakusa makes a face as he looks at the crumbs and wrinkled sheets even as he starts moving forward before Atsumu's eyes widen and he sits back up.

"Shit! Wait! I forgot 'bout the germ thing! Hold on!" Atsumu curses as he jumps back up to strip the bed.

Sakusa visibly relaxes before flinching. "No, I should-"

"I'm an alpha too, Omi-Omi." Atsumu cuts him off. "Let me take care a' ya too."

Sakusa frowns but still relaxes as he drenches whatever is handed to him in his scent as his contribution. "Sorry…"

"Don't be." Atsumu shrugs. "Ya can't help it an' seem ta have gotten better about it at least."

Sakusa still hates it but doesn't have to hesitate this time when he's pulled into the bed for Atsumu to lay on top of him and soak in his presence and scent. "I meant about everything."

"We'll work it out later." Atsumu sighs as he melts against who should have been his alpha years ago. "Right now, I just want ta be with ya. I missed ya."

"I missed you too." Sakusa sighs, basking in Atsumu's scent in turn and finally realizing how anxious his alpha had been when it relaxes for the first time in probably years. "So much."

"Don't ever leave me again." The setter mumbles as mahogany starts joining the mix to lull him into a calm he hasn't felt in years.

Sakusa holds Atsumu tighter as he growls into blonde hair. "Never again, 'Tsumu. Never again."

If they miss the next day of practice and return with mating bites, well, at least they're not fighting anymore.

[adultswim2021]

Robot Chicken #44: “Rabbits on a Roller Coaster” | August 26, 2007 - 11:30PM | S03E3

“The Worst Halloween” is about a boy who gets stuck with a Pink Power Ranger costume on Halloween. He has a bad night, including an almost-rape and finding out that his mom died. Seth called this one one of his favorite sketches. The writer of the sketch said he wrote it without any idea of where it was going and that “it shows”. I agree. Not particularly funny!

I don’t normally highlight quick channel change gags unless they actually make me laugh BUT the Judge banging a gavel only to have his bench turn into a Wack-A-Mole game honestly did make me laugh. The animation is great, and the gag worked for me. Sorry.

“Turbo Teen” is a parody of a relatively obscure Saturday Morning show of the same name where a teenager can turn into a car. In this one he’s drunk leaving a college party. When he becomes a car, a number of terrible things happen to him until he’s crushed into a cube. He changes back briefly and we see him now dismembered and mangled. For some reason I remember seeing this sketch randomly. Like the little bit where he’s in that abstract void writhing around was in my brain already. Most sketches on this show are just “character gets hurt over and over” and this is one of those.

“Dick Tracy’s a Dick” is about Dick Tracy off-handedly giving mean-spirited nicknames to his fellow police officers who didn’t ask for them. Honestly, this is a pretty funny premise. I should’ve guessed the punchline of the sketch before it happened, but this show has a way of lulling me into assuming nothing on it will make me laugh. I actually laughed at this sketch. I laughed twice at this episode. WOW. Not sure how it stacks up to Tracey Zooms In. 

“Trakker in Love” is the finale, and it’s over three minutes long. It feels more like two sketches jammed together, starting with a sequence where a younger character (I didn’t watch M.A.S.K. as a kid, sorry) is getting in trouble for having thrown a party there the previous night. The next scene feels like the beginning of a new sketch, involving one of the members of M.A.S.K. internet dating a fat woman. This one really sucks, and doesn’t seem to have much of a central idea. It feels ridiculous to say this about a show I’ve gone on the record of not liking very much, but it truly drags the episode down. 

After the credits is a parody of Joss Wheadon’s “Mutant Enemy Productions” vanity card. I remember seeing the “Mutant Enemy Productions" logo before, but I don’t remember why or where. I’m guessing one of his shows aired before something else I liked? Anyway, its not all that funny, just sorta relies on knowing the reference.

And that’s this one. Whew! Nasty show!

EPHEMERA CORNER

These commercials are from earlier in August, but it’s been a while since I linked to a random youtube:

MAIL BAG

I keep forgetting to address my precious mail baggers. I am so sorry. I cherish you all.

please do a top 10 for saul of the molemen!

Literally impossible. No way.

“Wildly unfunny” I bet you one of them yank fellas that just can’t understand the intricacies of Georgian life. I wish I could help you enjoy squidbillies, but the fact is you’re too much a dumsumbitch.

What is this even quoting? I literally searched all of my Squidbillies posts for the phrase “wildly unfunny” and it the only thing that came up was I said it in a Mail Bag referring to Minoriteam. Shut up please! I even *sorta* like Squidbillies

Is that the same comic con where you filmed yourself calling the aliens from Star Trek "f*ggots" because they were doing a Q&A?

This is in reference to my post about Tim & Eric Awesomecon/Comic-con 2007. No. How dare you. First of all, that wasn’t me. Second of all, that was at Great America theme park. GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT

[queerlordsimon]

I posted 407 times in 2022

That's 407 more posts than 2021!

72 posts created (18%)

335 posts reblogged (82%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@writing-prompt-s

@cupids-chamber

@menherasy

@eatcandlewax

@harunayuuka2060

I tagged 69 of my posts in 2022

#foryou - 55 posts

#fyp - 54 posts

#twst - 51 posts

#twisted wonderland - 51 posts

#writing - 24 posts

#x reader - 19 posts

#twst christmas - 18 posts

#christmas - 17 posts

#queer.lord answers - 17 posts

#twstoc - 13 posts

Longest Tag: 50 characters

#is this cause i said you havent terrorized me yet?

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Incorrect quote

Y/n: *imitating Crowley * you are so lucky I am so gracious and wonderful, so benevolent.

Ace:*snickering* truly. You are even more benevolent that the great sea witch herself.

Azul,who's in the room:....... I'm right here you know

Based on a convo with a friend

88 notes - Posted December 8, 2022

#4

Could I have Malleus for prompt 3?? It'd be really cute having them trying to figure it out together

The icing on the dragon

Day nine: prompt 3: making a gingerbread house. Malleus draconia x reader

Cw

An

Another staple of the winter holiday season, is making gingerbread houses. Big, small, amature or professional, it doesnt matter, a gingerbread house is a gingerbread house. And it was no different for night raven college.

Now, night raven college has an annual gingerbread house making competition. For the past three years, trey and his team has won each time. But y/n was hoping to change that. And for help with that, they recruited their dragon fae partner…

…who has never made a gingerbread house.

“Why can i not use magic child of man, the other teams will be.”

“Because, tsuno tarou, we should make it from scratch, with our hands. It may not turn out the best, but the judges will see that it was made with love.” malleus shook his head, but would comply with his partner.

Now, without much experience, making a gingerbread house can be tough. And it was no different for the dark fae prince of briar valley.

Hands covered in icing, he groaned as the roof fell off, yet again. “Child of man, this is a mighty difficult task. What is the reward you hope to receive from doing this all by hand?”

“Well, tsunotarou,” they hummed, and put some icing from their finger on his nose. “I wanted to have fun making something with you. “ the dragons eyes widened and he looked at his nose, before smiling and looking at his partner.

“Truely you do have no fear child of man. “ he smiled, pulling them closer with his icing covered hands on their shoulders. “But thats what i love about you. Ill try more, just for you.”

They did no end up winning, but before the building was over they ended up both covered in icing.

—----

-queer.lord

Sorry for it being late yet again, but i hope it was good enough. Malleus may be out of character, but i tried. I hope you enjoyed, requests are still open, you can find the prompt list HERE and the masterlist HERE. and ill be uploading another today, so see you then

90 notes - Posted December 10, 2022

#3

I would like to request prompt 8 with Ace!!🤭

Mistletoe Menace

Day one: prompt 8 “stop trying to get me to walk under the mistletoe” ace trappola x reader

Cw: mistletoe, tricks. Mostly funny

Authors note: welcome to the first day of  A Very Twisted Christmas, hope you enjoy it!

The holidays, a lovely time, and full of traditions and magic. Snow was on the ground and tinsel was being thrown around. Along with all of the other traditions, the mistletoe was hung all around.

Now we have no idea why that would be, seeing as it's a school, but who knows. It seemed likely that Crowley would be shipping his students. 

Or maybe it was Cater, he also seemed to be a likely culprit. 

Whoevers fault it was, it was now y/ns problem. Having to duck out of the way of the mistletoe, just to be cautious. Though it seemed, someone didn't get the memo. 

“Hey n/n! Come look at this thing on the ground!”

“Hey n/n! There's a hole in the floor, and deuce fell down it! Come look!” deuce was not pleased in being used as a ploy, especially since he was standing next to y/n.

“Hey n/n! Come get your notebook” the redhead waved it. And y/n shook their head, opting to go without the notebook until he gave in and gave it back.

“n/n! Come look at this!” y/n, did not in fact, go and look at it, and walked the other way.

Ace then came up with more, shall we say, daring tactics.

“Trappola stop running in the hall- why the heck do you have a beanie with mistletoe attached to it???” y/n did not come out from hiding behind Vil the rest of the day. Who was not having any of the card's antics.

“Spudling, if your gonna try to get a kiss, at the bare minimum do not wear a potato brown hat while doing so”

“Ace, what are you doing with my shampoo?” The boy looked meek, getting caught in the act. 

“...putting mistletoe in it?” 

“Get out.”

–

“We will not throw a hedgehog with mistletoe attached to it so you can trick y/n into kissing you, ace!” Trey shook his head. Cater was down. But Trey put his foot down.

“Ace, you gotta stop trying to get me under the mistletoe” y/n finally sighed, exasperated. Ace huffed.

“Well, stop dodging all my attempts!” y/n shook their head. 

“You know you didn't have to try and trick me under it, right?”

“.... what?” Y/N shook their head, before approaching the red head. 

“Now try looking up, trappola” the boy looked up, making an o on his face. Right above them, was indeed, mistletoe. y/n smiled and kissed his cheek. “Merry christmas ace” they hummed, before darting off. It took a moment for the boy to register what happened. Before chasing after y/n.

“Get back hear you- you mistletoe menace!”

—-------

Short, but sweet, and pretty funny. Thanks to the anon who requested this, and I hope you enjoyed it. Welcome to  A Very Twisted Christmas , and I hope day one was satisfactory!

-queer.lord

92 notes - Posted December 1, 2022

#2

Didnt know wherelse to go pt2

Prompt:

Looking up at the boys, swaying slightly as they’re close to passing out, mumbling “..didnt know where else to go…” the collapsing into their arms

y/ns sick, and after dark on a week off school, appears at the entrance of the boys dorms, before passing out.

Characters:riddle, ace, jade, vil, silver, floyd, rook, sebek

a/n: the first one was very highly received and liked, so i figured id do another one cause i dont have time yet again, but still wanted to write again

Heacannons below the cut

Riddle

He was finishing up making sure everything was taken care of for the next day, the unbirthday party, when you stumbled in.

He nearly scolded you for coming so late without warning, before taking a look at you.

He can immediately tell your sick, hes studying to be a doctor after all.

You mutter your line, before passing out onto the floor.

well actually he quickly slid to catch you, but he will never admit it and no one witnessed it

He picks you up and carries you to his room, so his noisy, nosey dormmates would leave you alone

He has the medications that you would need in his room, for studying, so hes all set.

Covers you with another blanket, sitting in the chair in his room.

Thats where youll find him when you wake up, though it seems hes dozed off.

Will nurse you back to health, while lightly scolding you, telling you to take better care of yourself and not to get sick again, cause he wont be taking care of you again

He totally will be though

See the full post

137 notes - Posted November 17, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Didn't know where else to go

Prompt:

Looking up at the boys, swaying slightly as they’re close to passing out, mumbling “..didnt know where else to go…” the collapsing into their arms

y/ns sick, and after dark on a week off school, appears at the entrance of the boys dorms, before passing out.

Characters: idia, epel, ruggie, jack, leona, deuce, azul, kalim, trey, malleus and lilia (a few of my faves essentially.)

a/n: i wanted to create something for you all, but im not feeling the best (mostly just dizzy, dont worry to much) so this is a fluffy comfort headcannons thing for me, but if you want i can do a part 2 (minus jamil,)

All of these are both platonic or romantic, you can definitely decide for yourself,

Headcannons below the cut

Deuce:

The shock on his face when he sees you exit the mirror, bundled in a ragged blanket from ramshackle, was already too much, much less you passing out.

Immediately catched you however he can and rushed back into the dorm house, shouting, which had agitated riddle

Until he saw you in that state and allowed deuce a pass.

Kicks everyone off the couch to lay you there

Riddle had trey get some medication, while helping out brew some tea for you.

Deuce was very frantic, staying with you, and was trying to wake you before cater stopped him, saying you needed to sleep to get better.

When you wake up, its dark, and your warm, bundled in a better blanket,

Riddle had made everyone go to sleep on time, but deuce stayed with you.

When you look around and attempt to sit up, you see him sitting on the floor by the couch

The movement jolted him out of his thoughts, making you stay laying down for a bit.

You heart warmed slightly at his efforts,

He basically nursed you back to health, with the help of his dormmates. (ace was keeping an eye on grim for you, the sweetheart)

Lots of cursing crowley for letting this happen to you

See the full post

227 notes - Posted November 6, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[deanwinchesterswitch]

Run To You ~ Chapter Six

Chapter Summary: Kasey and Dean take some time to get to know one another better.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Kasey Belmont (OFC)

Warnings: Fluff; A tiny bit of angst; Language

Rating: Mature 18+ (due to later chapters) NSFW

Word Count: 2225

Beta: @princessmisery666

Movie Reference/Quote: None

Author’s Notes: This is an AU. While there are several SPN characters mentioned, basically no one has the same connections as they did in the show, and Dean and Sam are not related.

Series Master Post

Written for: @jay-and-dean -Jay’s 3K Celebration and @spnaubingo.

Jay’s Prompts: Third Character ~ Victor Henriksen; Someone is ~ pregnant; Quote with 3 ~ “I have nothing to offer, 3 dollars and a bad bottle of whiskey, nothing more.” It was also inspired by the movie Labor Day with a hint of The Fugitive thrown in for good measure.

SPNAUBingo Square Filled: Fugitive AU

**ETA - Updated title card and format 3/13/23**

Kasey has to stifle a gasp when Dean enters the kitchen. No longer wet and matted against his head, his hair falls in short soft-looking waves, the ends flipping up a bit in the back. The scraggly russet bush that had been on his face is now neatly trimmed, showcasing a strong jawline.

And although she knows her opinion on it doesn’t matter, she can’t stop the words that spew from her lips. “I’m glad you didn’t nix the beard completely.” Dean’s eyebrows arch at her declaration, and she immediately drops her head, inwardly groaning.

“Yeah?” he laughs.

The heat spreads across her chest and up her neck, and she is absolutely positive that her face is beet red. Keeping her focus on the sandwiches she’s making, she nods and hums a reply, afraid of embarrassing herself further if she actually tries to speak.

“I kind of like it, too,” he continues. “Although, my hair is a bit longer than I normally like to wear it.”

Keeping her chin tucked, she peeks at him through her lashes, just in time to see thick fingers brush a lock of hair off his forehead, his large hand smoothing it into place. She has to physically bite the inside of her cheek to keep from telling him it’s the perfect length to grab hold of and tug.

What the fucking hell, Kase? Get your shit together.

With a huff, she slaps more bacon on the sandwich, scoops a large dollop of mayo from the jar with a knife, and slathers it across a slice of bread before smashing it on top.

“Everything okay?”

“What?” She didn’t mean for it to sound angry, but it’s already out there. “Sorry,” she breathes as she finally looks him in the face. His expression is a mix of concern and restrained laughter. “What?” she asks with a softer tone this time.

Dean tips his head toward the counter in front of her, teeth digging further into his bottom lip, eyes twinkling.

She follows his line of sight, loudly groaning when she sees that instead of a slice of bread, she'd grabbed the sponge she had been using to clean up after herself. “Dammit! What a waste of bacon.”

Dean bursts out laughing. The deep rich sound fills her ears and settles in her chest, making her heart flutter like a hummingbird’s wings. Sucking in a breath, she can’t help but join in seconds later as the corners of his eyes crinkle with glee. What else is she supposed to do anyway, cry about it? Well, she could; it is bacon, after all.

“Here, let me help. You go sit down.” He waves her toward the table, still chuckling.

“It’s alright, just give me a minute.” Picking up the plate, she tips the contents into the garbage bin under the counter and then places the dish in the sink. This time it’s her turn to burst out laughing.

As Dean rounds the corner of the island, she notices that the hem of the denim pants legs skims the tops of his ankles and how tight the t-shirt is stretched across his broad torso, the hem barely meeting the waistband of the jeans. As her eyes continue to drift upward, she finds a not-so-amused Dean staring back at her.

“Yeah, ha, ha, very funny,” he sneers, but there’s not much heat behind it.

“Oh my, I- I’m s- sor- sorry,” she sputters, covering her mouth to try and contain her amusement. It’s no use, though. The coil of nervous energy that’s been wound tight in her chest since he stumbled onto her lawn yesterday finally snaps. She descends into a fit of giggles, having to turn away from the angry face he’s making while trying not to laugh himself.

As soon as she hears his resolve crack, his belly laugh echoing through the room, she walks away, stumbling toward the dining table. She plops down in a chair and promptly buries her face in her hands, shoulders shaking. It takes her several minutes to calm down, and she exhales sharply before daring to look at Dean.

She finds him staring at her, an unreadable faraway expression in his eyes. “What? Do I have something on my face?” she asks as she wipes away the tears of delight that had seeped from beneath her lids.

Seemingly jolted from his thoughts, he rocks on his heels. “I- I haven’t laughed like that in a long time. Thank you.” He waves a hand over the countertop. “Thank you for all of this.”

“Ah, it’s nothing. I figured you hadn’t eaten in a while.” She gestures to the items laid out on the counter. “That’s why I was making BLTs. Figured a heavy meal might be too much for your stomach just yet. Besides, I’m starving.”

She moves to stand but is quickly waved off by Dean. “No, don’t get up. I can finish making these. It’s the least I can do.”

With a shrug, she sits back down. “Okay, well, the clean plates are in the cupboard to your left. Silverware is in the drawer below.”

His voice is hesitant as he grabs what he needs before returning to the island. “Can I ask you something?

“Sure.” Kasey turns in the seat to face him, hanging an arm over the back of the chair, while the fingers of her other hand tap lightly on the table.

Dean purses his lips and goes about putting their meal together. “Whose clothes are these?”

“My ex’s.” She then answers the obvious unasked follow-up. “He’s been gone for… a while. I’ll go up to the attic in the morning and find you some of my grandpa’s clothes. They should fit you better.”

Dean nods as he slices a tomato, seemingly mulling over his next question. There are probably a million of them racing through his head right now. Not the least of which is, why is she willing to help him after what he’s told her? Kasey gets it; she’s got several of her own. Tilting her head, she presses her lips into a thin line, contemplating the situation.

If this is going to work, if she’s going to get him freed and in the process keep herself from being arrested, they need to trust each other. That means they’re going to need a crash course on each other’s life. They’re going to have to be honest and talk about things they never wanted to think about again, let alone tell a complete stranger.

Well, she knows there are things she never wants to talk about again but will need to. She can’t honestly say how Dean will react to giving her more insight into his life and the events that led him to run headlong into hers. But, judging from the emotions she saw earlier, it won't be any easier for him.

Puffing out her cheeks, Kasey loudly expels her breath. “Right.” Dean jumps, hearing the slap of her hand on the table as she stands.

“You good?” he asks, eyeing her curiously.

Waving a hand in dismissal, she walks behind him and around the island, humming, “mhm-hm.” As she heads into the pantry, she calls back over her shoulder, “Oh, I like extra bacon on mine.”

She giggles at his muffled reply, “Woman after my own heart,” which probably wasn’t intended for her ears.

Walking out a couple of moments later, she holds up two crystal tumblers and a bottle of her best whiskey. “I think we’re going to need this.”

Dean looks up from the sandwich he’s cutting in half and nods enthusiastically. “I knew there was something cool about you.”

“Well, I figured since we have some heavy topics to discuss, it might help to smooth the road, pave the way,” she swivels her hips and twists her body, gliding her flattened hand through the air like she’s cool or something before realizing she sounds like an idiot, “uh, break the ice?”

There’s a slight upturn at the corner of Dean’s mouth before he presses his lips together and nods in silent agreement as he finishes plating their food. Kasey inwardly groans. Maybe she shouldn’t drink; there’s no telling what she might unwittingly blurt out. Embarrassing herself further is not high on her agenda. She needs to stay sharp, focused, but damn, the last twenty-plus hours have been a lot. Turning on the old clock radio that sits on the other end of the table, she adjusts the volume so that it’s just background noise and plops into a chair.

Dean sets a plate in front of her, looking over at the antique as he takes the seat across from her. “It’s like a museum around here. Don’t you have any electronics made after the 1970s?”

“Hey!” She angrily points the corner of her sandwich at him. “You will not malign this establishment or the contents within. All of this belonged to my grandparents. It’s my childhood home.”

“Woah, hey, sorry.” Dean lifts his hands in a show of acquiescence. “I didn’t mean any disrespect. I think it’s kinda cool, actually. I’m surprised that everything still works so well, though.”

“My grandpa was an electronics genius, mechanical stuff too; anything with gears, wires, or motors, he could fix. He taught me a few things. I don’t have the knack for it, not the way he did,” her indignation slips away with her shrug, “but I do the best I can.”

“I’m pretty good with that stuff too, so if there’s something you haven’t been able to fix, I can take a look at it,” he offers just before biting into his sandwich. “Som o’ bi’ch,” he moans around the mouthful. Swallowing, he adds, “This has got to be the best fucking BLT I’ve ever eaten.”

Kasey laughs at the sheer ecstasy reflected on his face as she pours a good helping of whiskey into each of their glasses. “Would you like to be alone with your food?”

“N-” Dean pounds on his chest as the bite he just wolfed down gets stuck in his esophagus. “No. Sorry. It’s just been so long since I’ve eaten anything that wasn’t stale or discarded. I’m not sure that some of it was even meant for human consumption.”

He doesn’t sound bitter about it. It’s simply framed as a statement of fact. It makes her heart break a little, and she resolves that tomorrow she will make him whatever he wants to eat, even if it means another trek into town.

He lifts his glass, and she stares in awe as he takes a large swig of the aged bourbon like it’s water, then finishes off the first half of his sandwich. Apparently, his digestive system isn’t as sensitive as she assumed it would be.

“So, uhm,” his tone is hesitant, “can I ask how you’re gonna help me?” Curiosity blazes in his eyes, pulling her back to the matter at hand.

“Oh. Yeah.” She takes a healthy swig of her own drink before continuing. “I’m an attorney. Was… well, am… “ She rolls her eyes at her stuttering. “I still have my license; I just don’t practice anymore.”

Dean’s eyebrows shoot up his forehead. “What the hell are you doing out here?”

“We’ll get to that later.” She tilts the rim of her glass toward him. “First, tell me how you escaped.”

The next few hours are spent exchanging stories. Dean manages to charm her into telling him why she cut herself off from the world amidst telling her about his harrowing escape and sharing a more in-depth account of the events that led his life to spiral down its current out-of-control path.

A paperwork mix-up led to him being held at the FCI in Three Rivers, Texas, for a little over four months before being transferred to Leavenworth. The transport bus was hijacked en route by another prisoner’s crew. Dean had contemplated waiting for additional authorities to arrive, even helping one of the guards during the melee. The guard had misread his intentions and shot Dean, assuming the inmate was trying to kill him.

In reality, Dean was only trying to assist the man since he had been injured in the crash. During the chaos that followed, the keys for the inmates’ chains landed on the floor between them. Dean realized he would probably never have another opportunity to start his own investigation and prove his innocence since the system had, and continued to, fail him.

“So I swiped the keys and ran,” Dean explains. “I slept in abandoned buildings for no more than an hour or two, stole the bare necessities when needed, and searched for a safe place. Somewhere to stay longer than a couple of hours. A place to lay my head down at night without fear of being caught,” his eyes flicker to Kasey and then around the room. A deep exhale seems to calm him, and she hopes it’s because he knows he’s found that haven with her. “A place where I could begin piecing together what the hell actually happened to my wife.”

As his story progresses, she sees the weight of exactly what he’s up against slowly pressing down on his shoulders, and he slumps in his chair.

“Wait,” Kasey holds a finger up to pause his retelling, “Your wife was a DEA agent?”

Previous // Next

Love Me Some Pie taglist: @akshi8278 // @asgoodasdancingqueen // @calaofnoldor // @compresshischest09 // @deanwanddamons // @flamencodiva // @idreamofplaid // @jerkbitchidjitassbutt @michellethetvaddict // @mvdeanw // @shawnie74 // @siospins2 // @thinkinghardhardlythinking // @thoughts-and-funnies // @waynes-multiverse // @wayward-and-worn // @waywardbaby // @weepingwillowphoenix

@muchamusedaboutnothing

[arwenkenobi48]

The PDF That Saved My Life - Why I Love “All Tomorrows” With All My Heart

(Content Warning: Discussions of trauma, suicidal ideation and sexual abuse)

*clears throat* So, as some of you may be aware, the past few weeks haven’t been easy, not in the least. I was struggling with serious suicidal urges and feeling extreme anguish towards my own body and soul. I believed myself to be tainted, filthy and all manner of destructive and negative things.

The reason behind this breakdown was due to the realisation that I had experienced sexual harassment and assault multiple times throughout my life, including an occasion last year in which I was groped by an immediate relative. I had been aware of the incident since it happened, but was in denial. I was thinking “It couldn’t have been that bad, right?” But after trying unsuccessfully to repress it, I had to face the facts that she did what she did. I was heartbroken and I’m still deeply saddened by the realisation. Everything just seemed to fall apart and I psychologically imploded, plummeting into a dark pit of worthlessness and childlike sorrow. I felt as if I had been thrown into a mental oubliette; just tossed away and forgotten about on every level. Whenever I wasn’t bawling my eyes out and grieving my lost innocence, I was stress-eating and lying in bed, feeling nothing. Every now and then, I’d receive a short burst of energy, but nothing substantial, and the feelings remained.

Despite all of that, though, I didn’t want to die. A small part of my mind wanted to hold on and ride out these waves of suicidal thoughts. But I also knew I shouldn’t have to be going through this cycle of building up and breaking down, so I finally managed to seek professional help. There’s another thing that also pushed me towards seeking help and eventually guided me out of this dark place, and that’s the work of science fiction I mentioned in the title. All Tomorrows by C. M. Koseman (I hope I’ve spelled that right).

I don’t remember exactly how I came across it, but I think it was the video by Alt Shift X on YouTube that did it. As you can imagine, my dark thoughts weren’t only directed towards myself, but the world at large. I was wondering how life could be so cruel as to let something so horrific happen to me. I saw the thumbnail of that video and I didn’t know what it was. I had vaguely heard of All Tomorrows, but was more familiar with the much more nihilistic Dougal Dixon book Man After Man, and as such I got the two confused. I clicked on the All Tomorrows video, barely paying much attention and dismissively thinking: “oh great another sci-fi dystopia that predicted humanity’s inevitable downfall”.

What that video showed me absolutely blew my mind. As I discovered C. M. Koseman’s intricate worldbuilding science fiction project, I became fascinated and enthralled by the journeys and evolutions of the various post-human species, from the fun-loving Satyriacs and the mellowed out Snake People, to the bloodthirsty Killer Folk and the horrifying Bone Crushers. Yes, many of the stories were very, very sad. The Mantelopes lost everything and devolved because intelligence was so painful. The Striders, Titans and Temptors were all wiped out before they had the chance to truly reach their full potential. The Qu and Gravitals, one could say, ruined everything. But what truly amazed me was the fact that many, many of these stories also contained great happiness.

The Colonials, for example, suffered through the kind of torture that I wouldn’t wish on the Devil himself. Being wedged together into a wall of flesh bricks, all while retaining intelligence. And yet, they managed to turn into the beautiful Modular People and create a utopian society. Yes, the Killer Folk are traditionally violent, but the ones that made the biggest progress were the ones that chose peace over war. The Satyriacs started off as the mindless Hedonists, but were able to use their intelligence to appreciate every moment of their joyful lives. The lowly Worms became the comfort-loving Snake People, always able to appreciate the little things in life. The flattened Lopsiders rose up from the ground and became the proud, tall Asymmetric People. The list goes on, but you get my point.

The point is, even though this future humanity went through the sort of Hell that makes the past few years look tame by comparison, they always managed to rise up. Sure, nothing was ever quite the same again, but they managed to make something new and wonderful out of that. When you cut an orange, you may not have a whole fruit anymore, but you have lots of slices that can be shared with everyone. The best thing you can do is move forward. The future will always hold something better for you, even if that seems impossible. Don’t be afraid to reach for it. The final quote of this incredible piece of sci-fi wiped away the remnants of dark still clinging to me: “Love today and seize all tomorrows.” To me, that meant “Be a kind soul and you can achieve anything.”

This entire story ignited a strong feeling of empathy within me; an emotion I thought I was too traumatised to ever properly feel or express again. I think that was the point. Sure, the many strange post-humans may not look like us, but we cannot deny that they are human and that brings out the best in us. We shouldn’t be afraid to show empathy for our fellow humans. Thinking lowly of what collectively proves to be our best quality, claiming we’re “above” it and aiming to become “bigger than” everything else deprives us of our humanity. Empathy, compassion, love, that’s what makes us truly powerful. If we can learn to love today, the utopian future we all dream of will finally be ours.

Love is something that, from an early age and for over half my life, I was never truly given. But that doesn’t mean I can’t give it to others. Just as the post-humans were able to move forward and rise from the ashes, I fully intend to do the same. I’m safe now. The people who hurt me are gone from my life and will never hurt me again. I’m surrounded by loving friends, in a city I love, attending a university I love, receiving the therapy I need to heal and soon to be medically transitioning too. Even though I still struggle to accept it, I’m learning to love myself as well. I think that’s the greatest love someone can ever feel. If I continue to love each today that comes, all the tomorrows will be brighter and brighter.

And to think this all started because of a PDF about the hypothetical future of humanity. I’m determined to hold on no matter what. Idk if C. M. Koseman uses tumblr or any other social media for that matter, but if he comes across this somehow, I just want to say “Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I wouldn’t be here today without All Tomorrows.”

https://youtu.be/-WIk29qtrIo

(PS: I know I have stumbled and made mistakes on my platform as well. I’m still a little bit unsteady after being in such a dark mental state for so long. I’m sorry about that. I am doing better. Thank you all if you made it this far. I love and appreciate every single one of you.)

[nekoannie-chan]

The Witches’ plan

Pairing: Steve Rogers X Witch!Reader.

Word count: 1673 words.

Summary: Your coven was going to conquer the world, but you had other plans for Steve.

Warnings: Smut, not very explicit. Reader is kind of evil.

A/N: This is my entry to @sweeterthanthis ‘Quote me on it’ 6K Writing Challenge with the TV Show quotes #16:

“If you look in the face of evil, evil’s gonna might back at you.”

Thanks to my beta reader @saiyanprincessswanie, I love you Missy.

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistake, please let me know and I will correct it.

I don’t give any kind of permission that my fics be posted in other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other's people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and is not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

My other media where I publish: Wattpad, Ao3, ffnet.

If you like it, please vote, comment, and give me feedback to improve my skills and reblog.

Tags: @sinceimetyou @navybrat817 @angrythingstarlight  @shield-agent78 @charmed-asylum  @pandaxnienke @real-fbi @smokeandnailz​  @white-wolf1940​ @tenaciousperfectionunknown​ @xoxonotme​ @bluemusickid​ @leyannrae​  @harrysthiccthighss​ @marvelatthisone

The sounds from the clock ticking in the living room broke the silence that seemed to go on for eternity. Your nerves are running on high as your mind starts thinking about the party that will be thrown tomorrow evening. For an instant, you come to believe that Steve suspects something as you caught him staring at you.

“Y/N?” His deep voice cuts through your thoughts. 

“Yeah, Steve?” You glance at him innocently.

"I was asking why you didn't tell me about Tony's party,” he inquired. 

“Tony is throwing a party? Sorry, I guess I’d forgotten it,” you confessed with a pout. What Steve didn’t know is it was a lie. You were nervous because it would be the first attempt to carry out the plan you made with the sisters of your coven. A plan that you were now unsure of following through with.

Power was something your sisters longed for in this world. If the coven could conquer this world through the dark dimension, they could have everything they wanted at the snap of a finger. The only people who truly stood in the way were Steve, Thor, and Dr Strange. With them out of the picture nothing could stop your coven from ruling the world and having everything that they wanted. 

Though a part of you wanted something much more than power. Your body and mind wanted to be with Steve. He was your drug that fed your addiction. Sex with Steve was unlike anything you experienced in this world. With his super-soldier serum running through his veins, he could pull you apart and put you back together for hours on end. Could you give him up for the high of absolute power? Your mind was at war with itself over whether or not you could follow the plan. 

You walked over to Steve and wrapped your arms around his neck. Your lips kissed below his ear as you softly spoke, “enough talk about the party. Come on Stevie, let's go to bed.” A groan escaped his lips as he picked you up, carrying you to your shared bedroom.

Looking in the mirror you adjusted the beautiful emerald green necklace that hung in the crevice of your bosoms. You wore a long black dress with a plunging neckline. Tonight, you wanted Steve’s full attention and with this dress, he would never let you leave his side.

You couldn't stop thinking about the last meeting you had with your sisters. However, you felt right now you knew this was the right thing to do. Morgan Le Fay would capture Dr Strange, Amora would grab Thor and you would get Steve. Never again would you allow someone to ruin all the work the coven had done.

You grabbed your purse and walked down the stairs where Steve was already waiting for you. He smiled as his eyes took you in and gently kissed your cheek. When he offered his arm, you took it as you made your way to the party. 

“You look good enough to eat, doll. Are you sure you want to go to the party?” 

A chuckle escaped your lips. “Oh Steve, you know we must make an appearance.” 

Steve nodded his head and started to make small talk as you made your way down the hallway to the ballroom. While he thought you were nervous about the event your mind went over the plan. Occasionally you would offer a hum to acknowledge him so he wouldn’t get suspicious of your demeanor. 

As you arrived at the party you soon realized that the plan you had made with the coven was not going to be able to go as planned. You should have known any party Tony threw for the Avengers Team would have people flocking to them to make conversation with the superheroes. Steve was surrounded by people who wanted to shake the golden boy’s hand and have that one selfie with the great Captain America. There was no way that you would be able to pull him away without someone noticing. 

Annoyance simmered under your skin as you tried to play the role of the supportive date. Your eyes roam the room taking in where the other targets and coven sisters were amongst the people. As your sisters moved through the crowd, they each shook their heads subtly. For now, you laughed at something Steve said to the small group that surrounded you both. Thankfully tomorrow there was always plan B.

The next morning you woke up in a bad mood due to the party. You drank more than you intended but it was the only way to keep yourself sane amongst the elites of the city. There was no way you could continue to live in a world that was foreign to you. If there was only a way you could take Steve and leave everything behind you would do it in a heartbeat. Lost in your thoughts Steve kissed your shoulder and you instinctively pulled away from him.

"I think someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed," Steve whispered as he slowly kissed you from your shoulder to that spot you liked behind your ear. A hum of contentment escaped your lips as his hand made its way between your legs. You tried to ignore him but Steve always knew how to make you submit to him. His warm breath puffed against your ear as he huskily spoke, “I know how to change your mood. I assure you that you will have no complaints.” A mischievous smile crossed your face as you let Steve make love to you.

Sure, enough after you both made love the bad mood you were in melted away. Steve was now sleeping soundly on his back as you cuddled close to him. It was at that moment you realized that in his sleeping state he was the most vulnerable. This could be the perfect time to use your powers to take him away from the chaos of this world. You closed your eyes, holding him to you as the magic left your fingers. The wisps of magic enveloped them and as she opened her eyes they were in a beautiful home on a tropical island. 

You watched as Steve still slept peacefully in the bed. Getting up carefully you tiptoed to the balcony that was attached to their room that oversaw the ocean. Sitting down cross-legged you started to meditate so you could make the connection to your sisters. It felt as if your body was weightless as your subconscious took over. Within minutes you made the connection to the leader of your coven, Wanda. The connection was strong and felt like she was in the same room with you.

“Wanda, I took Steve out of the equation. We are on an island away from the city as you asked. I’ve done as you asked.” 

The red-haired woman smiled back at you. “You have done well sister. I know how you feel about Steve and I know what you want to ask. As your reward, you may stay with him where you are. Keep him out of the way as we go forward to our plan.”

“Thank you, sister.” This was the best news you could have gotten. You were afraid you would have to fight for him. The connection finally disconnected and you blinked your eyes open. You stood from your spot and walked back into the bedroom but stopped as you locked eyes with Steve.

“Y/N, where are we?” Steve asked, pushing himself up on the bed.

“We are in paradise. We are free now, free from what the world expects from us. No longer do you have to be Captain America. Now we can live the lives that we wanted.” 

“I don’t understand. We can have that in the city. Why are we here? How did we get here?” 

You rolled your eyes. “No, we couldn’t. You want the truth? Fine I will tell you.” So, you decided to tell Steve everything from the coven to your plans that you made with them. Then you explained how your love for him was deeper than any power that you could get with your sisters. By the time you finished, Steve was furious.

“This is unacceptable. You expect me to love you after your coven of witches decided to take over the world? How could I love you after all this? You’re evil.” Steve shouted at you.

Anger flowed through your veins as you realized Steve wasn’t going to love you for who you are. That he wasn’t going to see that you left the coven behind and wanted to be good now. A fire burned in your eyes as the colorful magic was surrounding your fingers. “Evil? If you look in the face of evil, evil’s gonna look back at you. If you want me to be your villain, so be it.” A bright light enveloped the room as your anger, grief and heartbreak left your body.

The warm sun peeked through the window of the beach house you lived in. The cool breeze blew inside and made you shiver briefly before a strong, warm arm wrapped around you, pulling you back against their chest. The rough feeling of a beard against your neck tickled you causing a chuckle to escape your lips. 

“Good morning, Y/N.” Steve warmly said. You turned over slowly to face the love of your life. 

You waited until his blue eyes shined back at you. “Good morning, Stevie.” Your fingers lightly ran through his hair as he hiked your leg over his hip. Wisps of magic left your fingers and entered his mind. His blue eyes briefly turned gold before going back to blue again. The last thing you wanted to do was put Steve under a spell. But for now, as the world outside these walls fell to your coven as they took over the planet, you and Steve would live a little while in Heaven.

[myrandomfandomramblings]

Making memories - a Chenford fanfic

For Chenfordficweek2021 - as described by @therookiebook

Instead of a fic a day for chenford fic week I decided to just write one incorporating as many prompts as possible. This is because when I read them a few just connected in my head and then I had way to much fun seeing how many I could kinda incorporate. Some of the quotes aren’t word for word but the lines are inspired by the original prompt.

*Note: my beach fic was also inspired by this prompt list but I got antsy and posted it early so if you haven’t read it, you can check it out.

Main prompt: Road Trip

Other prompts:

July 11th- 

"Is that you...singing? Since when can you sing?" 

"I wish we could stay like this forever." 

Fight 

"You're comfier than a pillow." 

July 12th- 

With Child(ren)- theirs or not

"I fucked up."

"Where have you been?" 

July 13th- 

"You're crushing me." "I can't breathe with you on me." 

"Stay here." 

"What do you want?" 

July 14th- 

"I'm calling the police." "We are the police." 

"Don't move." 

"That a new dress?" 

Sweet tooth

July 15th- 

Locked out (Car/house/station) 

"Stop hogging all the blankets." 

"Why are you bleeding?" 

"Make me." 

July 16th- 

Shopping together or for the other 

Getting lost

"Is that my shirt?" 

Under the stars

July 17th- 

Competition 

Tears 

"Why are you so late?" 

When Lucy arrives in role call and hears she’s partnered with Tim for the day, she’s excited. When she hears they are to wear civvies and take Tim’s truck to surveil a suspect, she’s confused. And when said suspect drives further and further out of LA and they are instructed to keep on his tail, she’s annoyed. If she didn’t know better she’d think some writer designed the assignment purely because it was convenient for their story. Nevertheless, this is her life: crashing at a random hotel nearly nine hours from LA, after finally being relieved of surveillance detail, by the local sheriffs department, at 2:30am. The plus side is she’s being paid overtime, not only for the late night but also for the commute back to the city tomorrow. The down side is despite being exhausted she twists and turns all night unable to get comfortable in the strange environment. So when Tim knocks on the adjoining door between their rooms at 10am she’s already been up for a few hours. She has written a journal entry in her notes, preordered drinks for them to pick up at Starbucks and spent more time than she’d like to admit on google maps and various travel sites researching their trip home. She has also found time to plunder the continental breakfast and is currently demolishing a strawberry danish and a cinnamon bun. This earns criticism from Tim, whose plate carries sausage, eggs and an orange.

By 11am they’re on the open road again, coffees in the console between them. The small talk they had been making since they left the hotel had slowly died out so now they sit in comfortable silence. That is until Lucy reaches over to turn on the radio. 

“You know how I feel about car radios Chen,” Tim warns in his best TO voice. 

“Even off shift?” Lucy scoffs, and continues to press the on button and turn the volume dial up. Nevertheless, nothing happens.

“Looks like it doesn’t work anyway,” Tim states as he continues to hold the volume down button on the steering wheel, unbeknownst to Lucy.

“Fine then I’ll be the radio.” “You like Lady Marmalade, right?” She’s referencing Tim’s LA CLEAR security answer but she doesn’t wait for his reaction or reply before beginning to belt out the opening lyrics.

As she sings his initially surprised expression, morphs to shock and then awe. 

“Since when can you sing?” he asks when she finishes.

She just shrugs, looking down at her hands as they begin to fiddle in her lap.  

“Now I wish the radio really was broken,” Tim states as he turns it on and music starts playing.

Lucy shoots him a quick death glare before turning her attention back out the window.

---

By noon Lucy’s singing quietly along to the music (causing Tim to reevaluate his opinion on car radios) when she suddenly sneezes then freezes as her eyes go wide.

“Ah, can you stop at the next place with a bathroom?” she asks bashfully.

“We haven’t even been driving that long can you hold it?”

“Find me a bathroom or your truck will be covered in blood,” Lucy says, her tone conveying urgency.

“What? Why are you bleeding?” Tim asks, confused.

“If you don’t know why I, a woman, would be bleeding and thus need a bathroom then the public school system failed you.”

 “Oh, ah, right, sorry,” Tim stutters, “I think there’s a small town at the next exit.”

“Thank-you,” Lucy replies clearly relieved.

“Do we need to find a drug store or do you have what you need?’

“Ya, if you could find a drug store.” She’s fiddling again, unable to shake the feeling of embarrassment even though she knows, rationally, she has nothing to be embarrassed about.

Several minutes later Tim’s pulling into the drug store parking lot and Lucy’s unbuckling her seat belt to run in. But as soon as she stands up Tim’s voice stops her.

“Wait Luce.” There’s a tenderness to his voice especially when he uses the new nickname that stops her more than the instruction itself. “I think we’re too late.” 

Lucy looks down at the seat she just vacated to see its center now decorated with a dark red stain. A matching stain is present on the butt of the long yellow dress she’s wearing. 

“Of course,” she spits as she tries to fight back tears that are already running down her cheeks.

“That a new dress?” Tim questions awkwardly, caught off guard by the sudden display of emotion.

Lucy lets out a choked laugh as Tim flounders to find something helpful to say.

“I ruined your truck, I ruined my dress and now I have to walk around the drug store with a giant stain on my ass,” Lucy sniffs.

“Hey Lucy, everything’s going to be okay.” He reaches across the console to put a hand on her shoulder. “Stay here. I’ll go in and get what you need.”

She stares at him surprised and unsure. The idea of him buying her tampons and pads and, she realizes, new underwear seems uncomfortably intimate.

“So, ah, what do you want?”  

Because she has no desire to walk around the store with a giant blood stain on her butt she gives him her order, eyes down, face turning redder by the second.

He just nods and returns a few minutes later with three grocery bags and immediately hands them to her.

Inside she finds much more than she requested. The first bag contains two chocolate bars, two bags of candy, and two bottles of water. The second holds 6 different packages of assorted pads and tampons.

“How much blood do you think someone loses on their period,” Lucy teases.

Tim gives a small shrug. “I didn’t know which kind you wanted.” 

Inside the third bag Lucy finds a bottle of Advil, a package of wet-wipes, a spray bottle of stain remover, a new package of underwear (simple white cotton), a pair of black tights and a box of black garbage bags. 

“What are these for?” she asks holding up the garbage bags.

“They didn’t have any shirts so I thought we could make some head and arm holes and-“ he stops talking when he sees Lucy’s unimpressed expression. “I know it’s not ideal.” 

“Good thing I already have that figured out,” she says holding up a plaid button up. 

“Is that my shirt?” He had taken it off as soon as he got in the car, since like usual he had a henley underneath, and thrown it into the back. Lucy must of retrieved it while he was in the store. 

“Please,” she says fixing him with those puppy dog eyes. “I promise I won’t get blood on it. Well, I’ll do my best. Please don’t make me wear a garbage bag.” 

He laughs. “I forgot I had that. I guess I didn’t need these.” He takes the garbage bags from her and is about to throw them in the back when Lucy speaks up.

“Actually I’ll take one,” she says ripping the cardboard and freeing a single bag. She proceeds to rip a hole in the top of the garbage bag and pulls it over her legs like a skirt. Then she puts Tim’s plaid shirt on overtop. Tim is watching her with raised eyebrows.

“What? It’s just temporary. I promised I wouldn’t get blood on your shirt.” She puts everything she needs in her bag and goes into the bathroom to clean herself up. When she returns Tim is just finishing cleaning the blood off the passenger seat. 

“I would have done that.”

 “It was no trouble.” “Here spray some of this on your dress before the stain sets,” Tim offers as he hands her the stain remover.

Lucy does then drapes her dress over the backseat.

“Ready to go,” Tim asks.

 Lucy nods and by 1pm they’re back on the road.

 ---

By 2pm they’re both hungry and decide to stop for lunch. The place they choose is a fast food joint connected to a gas station. It’s busy. Probably because it’s the only place to eat for miles around. While they wait in line to order, Lucy goes to use the bathroom, only to find another line just as long. She decides to try the gas station bathroom instead, telling Tim that she’ll be right back but if he gets to the front first he knows her order. He goes to argue but she’s already gone, which is probably a good thing since he has no rebuttal, considering it’s the truth. 

A few minutes later Tim has their food: a veggie burger with extra pickles and fries for her and a burger and fries for him, but she still isn’t back. He wanders over to the gas station to find her standing in line at the register. 

“Put the candy back Chen.”

“Make me,” she says shaking the bags as she holds them by her shoulders.

Tim reaches for them but Lucy moves to evade his grasp. “Too slow,” she teases.

“You’ve already had two pastries, one bag of candy, a chocolate bar and a frappa-cappa-crapacciuno or whatever.”

“It was a chai tea latte and you know it.”  

“It was more sugar than anything and we still have more candy in the car. You’re going to give yourself diabetes.” 

She shrugs. “It’s not a road trip without excessive amounts of junk food.” 

“It’s not a road trip. It’s a commute home.” 

“It’s whatever we make it,” she says as she taps her card to pay for the candy. 

They find a state park a few minutes up the road and unpack their lunch at one of the picnic tables. They talk as they eat, familiar banter flying across the table. As they near the end of their food Lucy is animatedly telling a story about a recent arrest. She has a french fry in one hand and as she gestures, a little too aggressively, a glob of ketchup flies off the end of the fry and right into Tim’s face. 

She sinks down a little in her seat and covers her mouth to try to suppress a laugh.

“Did you just throw ketchup at me Chen?” he glares as he slowly removes the offending condiment.

“Not on purpose,” she giggles.

“If you start a fight you better be prepared to finish it,” he says as he rips open a package of mustard and squirts it at her.

Although it has poor projectile power a small amount lands in Lucy’s hair. She looks back at him mouth wide. “That was on purpose. That’s assault. I’m calling the police.”

“We are the police,” Tim deadpans as he rips the top off another mustard package.

“You wouldn’t” Lucy warns as she opens a mayo.

Then words are abandoned as condiments fly. They go through 5 ketchup, 3 mustard, 2 mayo, 1 bbq sauce, 1 ranch dressing, 1 aioli and 1 pepper packet before they both surrender. In fact the only packets left untouched are the hot sauce and salt. Both their faces are covered in assorted condiments. Most that had been scooped off the picnic table and smeared directly onto their target when it became clear the packets could barely project their contents a foot. The only one that was truly an effective weapon was the pepper which successfully gave Tim a sneezing fit. 

As they sit back down to finish the last bit of their lunch Lucy picks up a fry and runs it along Tim’s cheek then throws it in her mouth. 

“Not bad,” she says as Tim makes a face of disgust.

When the last fries are gone they throw out their garbage, wipe down the picnic table, then turn their attention to themselves.

“It’s a good thing I bought these wipes,” Tim says as he passes one to Lucy. 

She laughs as she takes it and begins to wash her face. 

“Did I get it all?” she asks when she thinks she’s done. “Because you didn’t,” she adds as she reaches up to wipe the side of his mouth.

He’s startled at first then his expression morphs into something she can’t quite read but something that makes her linger just a little longer than strictly necessary. Then she steps away and climbs into the drivers seat and by 3pm they’re back on their way.

---  

By 4pm Lucy’s in the middle of a seemingly endless monologue about the bachelor franchise when she looks over to realize that Tim is fast asleep. She would be insulted but instead she sees it as an opportunity. She starts to take every turn she can. Whenever she comes to an intersection she turns on to the smallest street. By the time Tim wakes up, about half an hour later (of course he would have is body trained to nap the ideal more than 20, less than 40 minutes), they are in the middle of nowhere. She waits until he’s fully awake then slams on the brakes.

“I’ve been shot. Where are we, Tim?” she demands in her best Tim Bradford voice. He looks out all the windows to see nothing but ranches then back at her, confusion clear on his face.

“Did you get us lost just so you could prove a point?” His tone an odd combination of annoyance and amusement.

“We’re not lost I’m taking the scenic route.” 

 “I’m pretty sure the scenic route is supposed to run along the ocean not through the desert in the middle of no where.” 

“We’re not in the middle of no where we are North of Martinus Corner at the intersection of Cross Rd and and Lockwood Jolon Rd,” she brags. 

“Great you know where we are. Do you know how to get us back onto the main road?”

“It’s not all about the destination, you know, It’s about the journey,” Lucy offers. “When’s the last time you did something just for the fun of it.”

“We go for a hike or a walk along the beach with Kojo every weekend.”

“I know I’m fun to be around,” she teases, “but that’s an errand, Tim, the dog needs exercise.” 

“I see your point but what are we supposed to do in the middle of ranch land? You want to go cow tipping?”

“We won’t be in ranch land for long,” Lucy replies, but half an hour and at least twenty turns later they’re still surrounded by fields and livestock.

“Will you admit you’re lost now?” Tim asks.

Lucy sighs, “Fine, can you please google map how to get to Route 1”

“We were on 5.”

“5’s the freeway. 1’s the scenic route,” Lucy explains. “the one that runs along the ocean.”

Before Tim can bring up the app they’re emerging into a small city centre. As Lucy continues down the main street she excitedly points ahead. 

“Let’s go bowling,” she says indicating the bowling alley sign.

“I thought you wanted to go to the ocean.”

“We can still take the scenic route home, after we go bowling.”

Tim sighs.

“Come on let’s have some fun, make some memories,” Lucy encourages.

“You’re not going to take no for an answer.”

Lucy shakes her head and happily pulls into the bowling alley parking lot.

Several minutes later they have their bowling shoes on and their names entered in the computer on lane 4. Tim goes first and immediately gets a strike.

“You want to put money on this game Chen?” he asks cockily.

“Lucky shot,” Lucy replies. “I’m not betting money but if you win I’ll let you pick the route home but if I win you can’t complain when we take the scenic route.

“Deal,” he says shaking her hand.

Lucy goes next and gets two gutter balls in a row. “Why didn’t we get the bumpers?”

“The bumpers are for kids.”

On her third throw she throws the bowl with two-hands after swinging it between her legs.

“Speaking of for kids,” Tim teases.

“Don’t argue with results,” she counters as her ball connects with the pins.

They continue going back and forth, Tim using the classic one-handed bowling throw and Lucy trying a different technique each time. She tries sitting down and pushing it down the lane, pulling out the ball slide meant for toddlers, standing backwards and throwing the ball between her legs but eventually settles on the two-handed granny throw. 

By half-way through the game Tim’s score is double Lucy’s and he starts to get cocky. He throws with his eyes closed, on one-foot and after spinning in a circle 10 times. 

3 quarters through the game the black lights come on and they laugh at each others teeth glowing in the dark. The disco lights and music follow. Then Lucy who had been giggling and joking around all game suddenly becomes serious. 

“I have two more turns and I really want a strike,” she states. She has a couple spares on the board but strikes remain elusive. Tim on the other hand has three.

“Can I show you? he questions handing her a ball.

He initially tries to coach her through the throw but she isn’t catching on so he steps behind her, puts his hand over hers and leans into her back as he guides her through the motion. The ball knocks over all but one pin but Lucy almost misses it because she’s looking up at Tim. He lets go and steps back.

“You think you can do that on your own next turn?” he asks shaking the huskiness from his voice.

She nods. Tim bowls, then it’s the moment of truth as Lucy throws her ball imaging Tim’s arm along hers, guiding it. The bowl rolls straight down the alley where it connects with the pins and knocks them all down. STRIKE flashes on the computer screen as Lucy jumps for joy then right into Tim for a celebratory hug. He’s initially surprised but is able to catch her and himself before they fall over. He spins them around as she laughs and he’s suddenly really glad Lucy made him stop.

With that the game is over. Tim’s still ahead but the margin had narrowed. They return their bowling shoes and head out to the truck.

“Fine you win this time, we can go back to the interstate but I want a rematch. I’m thinking mini-golf or the arcade,” Lucy says as she pulls out of the parking lot. 

“Nah, go to the 1,” Tim says as he starts to read the directions off his phone.

Lucy looks at him quizzically but doesn’t push her luck. By 6pm they’re driving along the ocean.

---

By 7pm, although it’s not that late, it’s already dark. That combined with her lack of sleep the night before is making Lucy sleepy. When she yawns for the third time in less than 20 minutes Tim suggests they switch drivers. Lucy happily obliges pulling into the next rest stop. During the day it would have a beautiful view of the ocean but now all one can see is darkness. The only evidence of the ocean’s presence being the rhythmic, crashing of waves against the base of the cliff below.

They pull into the abandoned lot; Lucy takes her time backing into a spot, mostly just to annoy Tim and they both get out, reflexively closing their doors behind them. As they pass each other Tim holds his hand out for the keys. 

“I just left them in the ignition,” Lucy explains. Tim looks over to the truck then back to her a look of defeat on his face.

“Your doors lock automatically, don’t they?” Lucy asks rhetorically, “I fucked up.” 

They try the doors just in case but sure enough they’re locked. 

“Well it could be worse,” Tim offers much to Lucy’s surprise, “at least it’s not running.” “I’ll call Angela and see if I can convince her to grab the extra set of keys from my house and come meet us but its going to be a couple hours.” 

Lucy nods. “Thank-you and I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Tim shrugs, “we’re making memories remember.” Then without another word we walks away from her as he hits a button on his phone and puts it to his ear. The conversation doesn’t last long. Angela obliges but insists that Tim now owes her one. He thinks she still owes him a couple from everything he did as her man of honour but decides now isn’t the time to bring that up. When he hangs up he finds Lucy has lowered the tailgate of his truck, where she now sits. She’s shivering, arms wrapped around herself, but she’s smiling as she looks up at the sky. 

“You can see the stars here,” she explains hearing him approach, “away from the lights and smog of the city.” 

Tim climbs up into the bed of his truck and removes a stack of old moving blankets from the storage box he keeps in the back. 

“Angela’s on her way but in the meantime we should stay warm.” He wraps one around Lucy’s shoulders. Then lays the rest on the floor of the truck bed. 

“Good thing I left these in after helping Tamara move last weekend.” He shimmies his way in-between two layers then taps the spot beside him, inviting Lucy to join. She climbs in beside him eager for more warmth. With the sun gone the temperature had dropped fast. 

Lucy pulls up an app on her phone and hands it to Tim so he can identify constellations for them while her hands and arms stay hidden under the blankets. Then they lay down and look-up at the stars. Tim uses the app to find constellations, points them out to Lucy, then reads the story about them provided by the app. Meanwhile Lucy snuggles deeper and deeper into the blankets. Tim stops in the middle of the story he’s reading about the the swan constellation as the blankets are pulled off his torso. 

"Stop hogging all the blankets,” he complains pulling them back.

“Sorry, I’m freezing,” she confesses. 

He pauses for a second clearly debating something internally before opening his arm out to the side. “Then come closer,” he finally says. 

She hesitates for a second before slowly moving to snuggle against his side. The possibility of warmth far outweighing any awkwardness she’s feeling. She rests her head on his chest. She can feel his heart racing to match her own and can’t help but smile to herself.

“Better?” he asks once she’s finished squirming around trying to maximize her view of the stars and the amount of body heat she’s receiving from him.

”You're comfier than a pillow,” she confirms, nodding. 

Tim doesn’t respond just wraps his arm around her shoulders. He continues to point out constellations and read the stories in Lucy’s app. 

“None of the constellations actually look like their name sakes,” Lucy says after a while.   

“You have to use your imagination.” 

“I could use my imagination to name my own constellations.” 

He shrugs. “Go for it.” 

She finds a cluster of stars that vaguely resembles a duck. She points it out to Tim then makes up a story about a duck that joined the LAPD and saved the city from a gang of geese. When she’s finished she turns to Tim,. “Your turn.”

He gives her his best ‘not happening’ look but he’s met with those pleading brown eyes that hold more power over him than he’ll ever admit and caves almost instantly.

He points out an X made of stars. “That is where the space pirates buried their treasure.” Lucy looks up at him expectantly. “The end,” he finishes.

“That’s your whole story? One sentence.”

“I’m not as creative as you.”

“Then tell a real story,” she says, “here I’ll go first.”

She points to a jumble of stars. “That is Caligula’s toy chest,” she says then proceeds to describe in great detail all the filthy, horrid things she had seen the day he taught her the DEAR method.

“Why would you tell me that?” he asks when she is done.

“Now you share my pain.”

Tim laughs and points at four stars arranged in a rectangle. “That is the phone that was used too much at work.” He spends his entire story essentially mocking her for always being on her phone. Lucy would be annoyed or insulted but the amount of detail he remembers about the completely benign things she has done is kind of sweet and a little exhilarating.

She next finds a ’surf board’ and tells the story of a weekend getaway with some collage friends that ended with a black eye, a broken board and a lot of great memories. 

Tim follows suit finding a ‘football’ and telling the story of a particularly memorable championship game during his high school career. He’s half-way through his story when he interrupts himself. “You're crushing me,” he tells Lucy who is draped over his torso. “What are you even doing?” I can't breathe with you on me."

“I’m tucking in the blanket so our heat doesn’t escape,” she says as she pushes the edge of the blanket under Tim’s side along the length of his body. When she’s done she rolls off of him, cuddles back into his side then tucks the opposite blanket edge under herself. 

When Tim finishes his story they continue to go back and forth, learning more and more about each other each turn. Lucy tells stories from the time she spent travelling and working odd jobs, from her time as a psych major and her time in the academy. Tim talks about his family, his time in the army, and his early years on the force and with Isabel. 

He tells her about a colleague who despite being a great cop made the mistake of using his radio near an explosive and paid for it with his life. He is the reason Tim baby powder bombs every Rookie: so no other good officers will be lost because a critical piece of information was taught so dryly that it couldn’t possibly be recalled under pressure. 

She tells him about her ring as she twirls it around her finger. About how she found it in her grandma’s dress-up chest when she was six and it immediately became her favourite item. How every time she played dress-up the ring was part of the costume, whether she was a princess or a ninja, a cat or a witch, a clown or a police officer. How unlike her parents, who always thought she’d follow their career paths, her grandma always told her she could be anything she wanted. How when her grandma passed away she had found the ring again as she helped her parents pack up her things. How she had started wearing it to feel closer to her. How as she looked at the ring day after day she heard her grandma’s voice in her head:  “You can do anything you put your mind too,”  “the sky’s the limit,” “do what makes you happy.” How that made her realize she was not where she wanted to be and led to her decision to quit her Master’s program.  How her parents had chalked it up to grief and tried to use psychoanalysis to convince her to return. How that had pissed Lucy off and led to her applying to the LAPD. How she had continued to wear the ring as a reminder and motivator during her training. How much it had meant to her to have it returned. How now it not only symbolizes her grandma’s belief in her, but also Tim’s and her own. How it continues to give her strength.

As Lucy talks Tim rubs circles on her back as if connecting the stars that constitute Lucy’s ‘ring’ constellation. 

Just as she finishes she excitedly points up. “Look a shooting star!”

“Make a wish,” Tim advises.

“I wish we could stay like this forever.” She surprises herself by how quick and confident that comes out. She hadn’t even thought about it, but it is true. In this moment everything is perfect. She is no longer cold. She is warm and happy in her little burrito with Tim: wearing his shirt, listening to the ocean, surrounded by stars. 

Lucy half hears Tim name a constellation “the best boot I ever trained” and start to tell a Coles notes version of their story but she’s already falling asleep.

She wakes up some time later to Tim shifting beside her. 

“Don’t move,” she groans still half-asleep.“

“Ange is here Luce. It’s time to go home.” 

“Am home,” she mumbles before falling back asleep.

Tim manages to free himself from Lucy and the blankets. He shuffles out of the back of the truck and walks around it to meet Angela who is just getting out of her car.

“Where have you been,” Tim asks. 

“Driving.” 

“I mean, what took you so long?” 

“I thought you might be enjoying your alone time with Lucy more than you’d admit, so I didn’t rush.” 

He wanted to argue but he couldn’t. “Thank-you for coming.”

She shrugs. “Honestly, when your baby refuses to sleep anywhere but a moving car a 4 hour drive is not as inconvenient as it sounds.”

As if to prove her point the infant starts wailing from inside the vehicle.

Before Angela can move Tim’s opening her car door and removing his god child from the car seat. He holds the baby to his chest and starts rocking him. As the baby continues to scream and Tim continues to rock, sway and bounce, Lucy emerges from behind Tim’s truck seemingly woken by the crying.

“There’s my favourite little guy,” she coos as she approaches. “You’ve gotten so big. Next time I see you you’ll be taller than your Uncle Tim,” she continues as she rubs the baby’s back. Despite all the attention the baby continues to fuss.

“He’s hungry,” Angela explains. “Give him this,” she continues handing him a full bottle, “I pumped on the way here.”

“You pumped while driving?”

“It’s called multitasking.”

Tim takes the bottle and offers it to the baby who immediately begins suckling. While the baby drinks Lucy goes back to Tim’s truck and grabs some blankets. She gives one to Angela, drapes another over Tim and the little boy and wraps herself in the last. 

Over the next half an hour Tim and Lucy work together to feed, burp, and change the baby before putting him back in his carseat, all while his mother watches with a very amused expression. When he’s buckled in they say their goodbyes, thank Angela again, then head back to Tim’s truck, which is now unlocked.

By 10pm they are back on the road. They spend the rest of the drive cooing over baby Evers and talking about their own theoretical future kids. While conveniently avoiding any mention of theoretical future spouses or co-parents.

By midnight Lucy is just getting home. As she walks through the door she sees Jackson on the couch watching TV. 

“Why are you so late?” he asks turning towards her.

“Long story.” 

“Is that Tim’s shirt?” 

“Longer story.” 

“Aha,” Jackson says giving her a knowing look.

She just rolls her eyes and goes to get ready for bed. She falls asleep almost immediately and dreams of sweets and stars, babies and bowling and a life with Tim.