#title; mindfuck series

[boundtoletters]

📖 books i read in 2024: mindf*ck series by s. t. abby

“To defeat a monster, you have to be twice as monstrous. To love a monster, you have to share your soul.”

[spiritualviolation]

HEADCANON FREE SPACE - GRIAN

from the response to this post

hi hello!! this post is a free space for people to come by and share their headcanons about a specific mcyt character, and this post is for grian!

grian is like. one of those chars that are just headcanon central, so i thought it be appropriate to start with him

not-exactly-rules but some guidelines + my own headcanons under the cut!

- GO ABSOLUTELY NUTS!! share as MANY as you like, i literally don’t mind if you’re going to make a ten page essay about your headcanons. just go wild, just as long as it sticks to the character of this post! bc if it i do multiple characters on one post it might get overwhelming and messy

- you can either do it in the tags or you can just reblog and add to this, i don’t mind as long as it’s convenient for you! you can add to other people’s rbs but i do think it would be better if you rb it straight off this post, but that depends on you!!

- if you want to reblog with your design as well so you can explain your hcs, go ahead! i would absolutely love to see how people design the characters individually!!

i will probably make a masterpost for this but for now we’ll start humble, but i’m aiming to release one post per week, but maybe would speed it up if my schedule allows me!

so yea, go wild!

i will probably start with the life series peeps first but i am thinking of maybe doing qsmp peeps as well after!

my grian headcanons cause i wrote a whole thing in my notes app:

- in my hc, the forms of watchers are dream-like and amorphous, basically visual mindfucks in appearance. grian who was fairly new to the watchers still kept his regular human form, but those who have been watchers for a very long time eventually would lose their individual human identity, and is assimilated into the collective that are the watchers. grian, if give or take maybe a century, the same thing would have eventually happened to him.

- his wings, gifted to him when he was ‘taken’, are generally amorphous and shifting, and you can never focus what shape they’re supposed to be (they can give you a headache the longer you try to look at their genuine form), but he can disguise them in any shape he wants (bird wings, dragon wings, etc.) so it doesn’t hurt to look at them.

- grian cut off his association with them just several months after he was taken, joining hermitcraft not long after, estranging themselves from them.

- he can still use his powers (which include astral projection, and etc.), but because of his cut ties they’re significantly weaker than the average watcher. for example, watchers can ‘watch’ over an entire server, but grian can only ‘watch’ one person at a time.

- his reasons for not wanting to be assimilated into the watchers is that he knows what it’s like to have been pushed and forced to take up a role against his will (ahem high school ahem), and it’s hurt him and he won’t want to let it hurt him again. aside from that, he finds that the watchers are extremely boring, considering all they do is observing passively from the sidelines and all that, which is the complete opposite of how grian likes to operate. he finds it extremely restrictive and prevents him from actively participating in things. not wanting to be confined to that, he cut ties with them.

- however he still uses his powers for troublemaking and mischief, and also to help others when they need it. he doesn’t consider himself affiliated with the watchers because he thinks it’s merely some godly title and also because he wouldn’t want anyone to think him differently, so he doesn’t really hide it.

- as he denied his watcher status very early into joining them, he still has the physicality (stamina, energy and such) of a regular human. only his wings are amorphous instead of his entire form since his wings were given to him when he joined them.

- made the life smp as a fun game for his friends, but in my hc, they did a test run before starting 3rd life. it was during that test run when the watchers seized control over the server.

- during 3rd life, he put admin restrictions on himself to remove his wings so he couldn’t fly and it was fair game for the rest.

[gffa]

No, seriously, I can’t tell you what a mindfuck it is to get back into a series you left approximately 10 years ago, so you have a basic foundation of knowledge and you read a shitload of the source material, but so much has happened in that time and you’re fine with picking and choosing which parts to read (it’s comics, reading order is only for those who were keeping up at the time or people who want to give themselves a nervous breakdown, just read storylines whatever in whatever order you want), but you don’t know which ones are good and which ones are bad and that’s the thing that makes it really mindfucky. Because sometimes you just have to wholesale throw out a given author’s take on a comics character, because they’re just really crap at writing them.  Did you know Chuck Austen once wrote for the X-Men?  No, he didn’t, because 99% of us agreed it was such shit that we threw it out and never looked back.  Did you know Judd Winick wrote for the Batfam comics at one point?  Well, he half did, because I loved half of what he wrote and the other half no longer exists because I hated it.  Same for Devin Grayson, I will go to bat for her Gotham Knights work, but her Nightwing work made me want to rage scream into a pillow, I was so excited when she was announced for the title and then..... that. And that’s not even getting into authors you hated/loved while the majority of fandom felt the reverse, to this day I want to light Morrison’s X-Men work on fire, but everyone else loves them, and I still don’t know what I think of their DC work, well, I think I remember liking their JLA run, but their Batfam stuff is complicated for me.  So I can’t just ask someone, “Hey, is this author’s work good?” because maybe I’ll feel the opposite!  Or maybe I’m the one who’s wrong because characterization has evolved in a way I’m not yet aware of! All of that is part and parcel of reading comics, it’s fine, you get used to it, but that’s while you’re in it.  I stepped away for so long and now I’m reading comics and, oh, hey, I liked this issue!  And, you know, it’s fine that I liked it, I’m not changing my mind based on what others think, but until I read 5,000 more issues, I won’t know how it does or doesn’t complement the other ways the character are written, and like. That’s also fine, but what I mean is. I have opinions on these characters, but also I can’t have opinions on these characters until I read a lot more because *waves hand* 10 years of lore that I only very, very vaguely followed, and it’s SUCH a mindfuck to be caught between these two views!  I have opinions but also I don’t have opinions, I’m old hat at this and also a baby at the same time, I know so much and I know nothing at all, it’s fucking weird to wrap my head around!!

[averseunhinged]

i am once again sick af and unable to do any of the things i want to do this weekend. so, here's a consolidated record of watch all the things 2024, one of my new year's resolutions, because i'll forget them otherwise, and there's no way i'll sift back through an entire year of blsky chatter to find anything.

saltburn - the best movie ever. you kind of have to understand what you're getting into with it. like if you don't recognize the title sequence font at the beginning and the way it's shot, you might expect too much from it. it's salacious and sleazy and creepy and weird. those are features, not bugs.

true detective: night country e1-4 - love the vibe, love the characters. far north snow horror is a lot of fun and iceland is mind-bending beautiful. writing's a little uneven. sometimes it's clunky and contrived and the dialogue doesn't help the actors at all. sometimes there's a scene that's so well-written, i'll probably think about it for years. also, if you've been tracking christopher eccleston's attempts at an american accent, this is probably his best one yet. it still doesn't sound quite right, but it's better.

rap sh!t - s1e1. this is just not for me. it's structured around a lot of the things i hate about social media. i do think it has something valuable to say, tho, and it's a shame it's been cancelled.

dungeons & dragons - didn't finish this. the way it's written is interesting (probs more so for ppl who have a better understanding of/actual experience with ttrpg), but it's just not for me atm.

the devil's hour - my favorite thing i've watched in a long time. it's very well-written and the way it's structured is fascinating. it plays like horror for the first three episodes and then the back three are just straight unhinged sci-fi mindfuck. the acting's compelling, for the most part, or at least everyone's doing their level best with what they were given. nikesh patel is good, but he kind of suffers from having to be in the same room with jessica raine and peter capaldi, who are acting their faces off, a lot. phil dunster is appropriately hot. benjamin chivers is sympathetic while doing and saying some legit creepy, chilling things. barbara marten is moving as lucy's mother. i'm thrilled it's been picked up for two more series.

perry mason - s1e1. had some moments i was really into, but most of it was meh. full disclosure, this was heavily influenced by the sound sucking ass. there was a lot of mumbling in true noir style, but if your actors are going to make that choice, you really need to back off on the music and ambient noise. granted, my hearing is shit, and i use captions anyway, but if i can understand other things without looking at the screen, it's not 100% a me problem.

the outsider - s1e1. exactly what i want to watch rn. similar vibes to night country and the devil's hour. i'm not up to date on the stephen king universe at all, so i might be missing a lot, but you don't need to know the background to understand it.

[bookishlilcorner]

I started the mindfuck series and all I have to say for now is that the title matches the plot.

[brittlebutch]

I’ve finally finished MH—and I loved it—but I didn’t understand the finale at all.

Was everyone who was supposedly dead actually fine? Was The Operator just fucking with things? Was entry 87 possibly from an earlier point on the timeline? (Was it the sort of thing where they left it that way as the hook for another season, and then the plans fell through?)

Or is it just one of those mindfuck endings where there isn’t really any explanation because it’s not supposed to make sense? 😂

!!! congrats on finishing the series; i'm glad you enjoyed it!!! i am so excited to answer this question; i'm putting it under a cut for both Length and Spoilers!

OK. So i'm going to go ahead and cover the whole final arc of the series, starting with entry 73 because that's when the first threads start to come together! Since you've already finished the series, I'm going to go ahead and refer to the Hooded Man as Brian throughout just bc it's less letters to type lol.

Couple things to keep in mind though: 1) a lot of this series is ambiguous, and there aren't Exactly Clear Cut Intentions in what you're meant to interpret from what's shown. I have clear interpretations and biases, but they aren't necessarily The Singular Correct Way to interpret the events/motivations, yk? 2) Extremely important to remember that the linear numbering of entries means NOTHING wrt the actual timeline of the show <- What gets posted to the MH channel is decided and done by the Characters, but the entry number titles do not necessarily correspond with linear events (ie; the footage shown in e76 was filmed before e33 was posted which happened Way after e52 was filmed.) When something was FILMED and when it was POSTED do not correspond; but hopefully I'm able to successfully provide context to help delineate these things. anyway!!

In e73, Brian goes and breaks in to Tim's house again - he's done this before on a variety of occasions, usually to steal medication as he's doing in this entry. While he's there, he showcases a tape that Tim has tucked away in a box, and discovers that Alex has been squatting in Tim's attic for an unknown amount of time. Alex has been watching the MH channel since its inception, and knew that Tim and Jay were out of town but didn't know when they'd be back - he's been hiding inside the house in the hopes of getting the edge of surprise against them when they come back. Important: Brian is the one who posted this entry (denoted by the inconsistencies in the title/description/text cards.) He's broken into the MH account several times, usually to highlight information he Needs Jay to pay attention to - this is his way of warning Tim and jay that Alex is in the house and still a threat.

in e75, Jay and Tim return to Tim's house, ready to face Alex because they caught Brian's warning. By the time they get there though, Brian has already made his move against Alex - attacking him and spiriting him away to the address he'd left on the back of Alex's photo of Amy. Jay's attention is snagged irrevocably on the tape that Brian had highlighted in the previous entry, and tries to look for it, only to realize that Tim had already grabbed it and hidden it in his pocket. Jay fails to be rational about this, steals the tape, and runs off on his own.

e76 is the footage that was on the tape Jay stole, which picks up from the events showcased all the way back in e32/33 - when Jess and Jay finally realized that they Were in a connected room for a reason bc they were both experiencing the same (Operator induced) symptoms, they briefly split up to pack their things so they could leave the hotel for a safer second location. They were interrupted before they could leave though - Jay goes into her room and finds nothing but the note with the code to the safe and then gets chased off from the hotel by Masky. e32/33 is Jay's footage of this event, e76 was Brian's footage of that same day.

Jessica wasn't in the room when Jay looked for her because Tim and Brian conspired to get her out of there before Jay could talk to her. Jessica was not embroiled in the thick of things like Jay and the others were - in essence, there was still time to save her before she got a chance to truly devolve; Jay really does mean well, but his intent was to explain what was going on and interrogate her version of events, which would have made things worse for her, so totheark intervened to prevent this by kidnapping her. They were interrupted by Alex, who attempted to kill Jessica again in his attempt to spare her (Alex is also ultimately well-meaning, but we'll get to this later), and Brian and Jessica wind up split up bc Brian stayed to beat Alex back and Jessica ran off on her own, where she encountered the Operator and collapsed.

[Part of the Operator's influence is its tendency to cause seizures/collapse in people, and another aspect is its spiriting away of their bodies. All of the College Era footage of Alex attacking the other cast members - it's more or less clear that they did not die. There is some ambiguity in this, but I don't believe Alex successfully killed anyone in that first brush with things though I do think it's likely he was Trying to. A very significant aspect of what the Operator Does is the Ark - this is the pitch black place we've seen Tim wind up in in e65. It's unclear exactly what that is or what it does, but it is intrinsically linked to the Operator. In the comics it's implied to be alive and hungry, a place both the living and dead are able to enter, Brian (and Tim) are especially implied to have been able to navigate the ark with some success, although it's also shown that going there At All means leaving some part of yourself behind. In essence, the Ark is always taking bites of the people inside it, but there are ways to avoid being Swallowed Whole. When the Operator takes people - and it's taken corpses, unconscious people, and conscious people - it takes them to the Ark. When Jessica disappears at the end of e76, that was the Operator taking her, but this does not mean she is DEAD.

In fact, Tim entering the frame at the end of the entry is significant. The timeline of season 2 is extremely difficult to navigate, because as you watch videos it seems to fold back on itself. Jay wakes up in e27 with no memory of how he got there, he leaves the hotel in e33 with the tapes from the safe, and then basically every entry from 35 to 52 is Jay uploading OLD footage that took place BEFORE e27 was ever uploaded. This is important with regards to Tim - although we see Tim and Brian working together/separate in entries like 35 and 45, we don't really get any indication that they're doing anything over the months that Jay spends reviewing that old footage and posting it to the channel. This is because they'd been separated.

Tim isn't lying when he says he has no memory or awareness of working with totheark. Regardless of whether you interpret him under the mask as a System Alter (as in DID) or believe he was working under his own volition, but experienced memory loss just like Jay did, Tim does not know what's going on. The expression he wears at the end of e76 is because he doesn't know how he got in the forest - either because he Switched OR bc he had his own encounter with the Operator that night and wound up with memory loss from its influence. BUT it's important bc he was in the same vicinity as Jessica - when she escaped the Ark, it's likely they would still be in the same vicinity. A core aspect to Tim's character is his drive to help people; regardless of whether or not Tim understood anything that was happening, if he'd run into Jessica (panicked and lost in the woods with no memory of how she got there - sounds familiar, right?) he would have reached out to help her get help.]

Briefly cutting ahead to e82 bc it contains footage from this point in the chronological timeline. Jay has just watched the tape that Tim was hiding and discovered that Tim knew that Jessica was alive and arguably knew where she was <- again, if Tim had encountered Jessica in Rosswood after the events from the e76 footage he would have helped her, and later, he would have known that despite Jay's best intentions Jay would not be good for her and would try his best to keep them separate, playing dumb and making sure that Jay didn't know anything about that possible connection. In this e82 footage, Jay calls Tim and agrees that Tim made the best choice by doing this, admits he's confused and extremely disoriented, and apologizes and says they should try to meet back up and work together again. The Operator interrupts him, and he collapses. Tim specifies he never received that call/voicemail.

e77 is the direct follow up event to Jay's collapse from the e82 footage. Despite his phone call where he apologized and said he understood, Jay is now acting paranoid and aggressive again - this is because of the Operator's influence. He attempts to attack Tim with the knife, and Tim restrains him and says he's going to check out the college alone because Jay is behaving erratically and can't be trusted. He plans to return to let Jay out afterwards.

in e78/79, Brian breaks into Tim's house and lets Jay out himself. He wants Tim and Jay both to confront Alex in Benedict Hall (the address left on Amy's photo). Jay follows Tim to the college, but Jay can't get into that particular building and settles for watching across the street.

QUADRANT is a significant upload. There's ambiguity in it like there is in all totheark uploads, but I believe that this is Brian's attempt to warn Tim and Jay that he's officially lost control of the situation (of Alex in particular) - they all need to bunker down and stay in place bc he doesn't know what's going to happen anymore and that means they're all at risk

[What, exactly, Brian wants to happen between Jay, Tim, and Alex is extremely unclear, personally I'm not even sure he knows. It's a running thread throughout the entirety of the series that Brian wants Alex dead - the two of them were Best Friends in college, but when Alex attacked him in college as shown in e51 (56-42 tape) the betrayal left him broken in a myriad of ways and he's never forgiven Alex this. Brian hates Alex, he says it constantly, BUT despite his constant threats and promises to kill Alex, when they're in the same space together he never seems to be able to follow through. Instead, most of his tangible plans seem to be putting Alex in Tim's path <- Tim is not easy to predict; sometimes he'll react by throwing punches first and asking questions later, and sometimes he'll refuse to lift a hand to do anything other than offer it as Help. I don't think Brian can actually bring himself to kill Alex on his own, which is why he didn't do so during the months he had him successfully restrained, and I don't think it's insignificant that he chose Tim as an alternative tool when Tim is statistically more likely to try to help someone than kill them. That's interpretation though.]

But, the problem with Quadrant is the problem with most of the totheark uploads - it's extremely difficult to parse (even I might not be interpreting it correctly). Whether this is intentional due to apathy or a side effect Brian can't help (as i've speculated before), the messages are difficult to understand. If this is a warning, it's not one that succeeds in its goal - neither Tim nor Jay are adequately prepared.

in entry 80 Jay enters Benedict Hall on his own and encounters Alex. Alex shoots Jay. Jay dies. The Operator takes his corpse into the Ark.

in entry 83, Brian attempts to team up with Tim again. They'd worked together before - although Tim can't remember it - but seemed to have had a permanent split somewhere around Season 2.*** Since Tim doesn't have any genuine context for Why Brian would be pursuing this, and because Tim blames Brian for not warning them properly that Alex was loose, and because of the potential that Brian had something to do with the 'YOUR FAULT' / papers surrounding Jay's displayed body in Tim's house (Personally, I think Brian seems too stumbled/taken aback in the hallway for it to have been him), Tim rejects this and the two of them get into some Operator Induced Looney Tunes bullshit, and when it seems like Tim might genuine move to strike Brian, Brian seemingly chooses to fall to his death instead. Brian dies. The Operator takes his corpse into the Ark.

[***At first this was likely solely bc of Tim's memory issues. However, around that time is also when Brian discovered Tim's medical history - the fact that he'd been potentially encountering the Operator since he was a child. It is canonical that the Operator is like a disease - it's spread from person to person - and whether it was intentional or not, Tim seems to have been ground zero - the way Alex reacts to the glitch in the camera in the e84 footage from Marble Hornet's initial auditions can confirm this. He seems irritated and surprised by it, like it's the first time he's seen something like that happen, immediately after meeting Tim for the first time. Everyone thought Alex was the one who brought the Operator into the ring - even Alex thought this - but it was following Tim. After discovering this, Brian can't forgive Tim of this either, any trust he had towards Tim has been shattered, but there are uploads he makes where he seems almost sad about this. Almost bereft now that he's working alone and watching Tim and Jay work together, but despite that he can't get over the perceived betrayal enough to genuinely attempt to reconnect.]

E84 is mostly the footage from the tape Brian was carrying in his pocket when he died - of the initial Marble Hornets film project auditions. I find it particularly devastating to dwell on which tapes characters chose to keep close to them throughout everything. The 56-42 tape of Alex attacking Brian in college, Alex kept in a hidden compartment in the desk by his bed in his apartment (despite the fact that he'd burnt or gotten rid of seemingly every other tape he'd filmed from that era). This e84 audition tape that Brian kept in his pocket. If I think about it too long I go insane. BUT Also just funny to note that Tim is the one who posted this entry, and even though he seemingly left everything else untouched, he went through and cut out the whole of the footage from his audition. Fun little character detail lol.

E85 is footage of Tim idling around, seeming a little lost now that Jay and Brian are both dead, and he doesn't know where Alex is. He seems to realize after a while that Alex will probably eventually come looking for him at his house, and resolves to watch it from across the street instead. Proven right when Alex does indeed show up and intends to burn Tim's house down [side note: confirming in a way that Alex was the one who burned Jay's old apartment down as showcased in e25. bc of the ###### upload, a lot of people assume that totheark burned it down, but that upload is actually a kind of twisted way of getting Jay to leave the place and be too paranoid to return, which is why he's safely in a hotel when his apartment burns]. Alex admits he'd also thought he'd been the source for the Operator, but now knows it was Tim the whole time. Attempts to goad Tim into staying in the house to burn to death, but also says Tim should go find him if he won't so that they can end things.

e86. OOF. Tim has indeed gone out to find Alex to end things, but despite the fact that Alex is still trying to kill him, Tim attempts to reason with him. This is where Alex explains that he's been doing everything he'd done in an attempt to cull the infection - he doesn't truly understand what's going on, but has been able to tell that the Operator is an influence that spreads from person to person and causes massive life-interrupting symptoms, and so Alex finally fell to attempting to kill everyone Half to stop the spread of the Operator before it could infect new people and Half to stop the progression of the illness in everyone before they could wind up hurt worse (mercy kill, in a way). Alex is not working for/with the Operator, he is actively attempting to work against it BUT, whether due to his own ignorance or possibly the Operator itself distorting his ability to think clearly, he has also been making things worse in his own way.

[Think it's important to denote here that basically EVERYONE involved was making things worse in their own ways. Jay's insatiable need to find answers was wreaking havoc and making things worse - his stalking of Tim and Alex caused more conflicts than it ever would have solved, he would have dragged Jessica back into the middle of everything without sparing a thought to the consequences, and even he acknowledges that continuing to look for answers is having a negative effect on him, but he still can't make himself stop. Brian I think was attempting to help, but his unclear motivations and his inability to communicate clearly tended to make the others more paranoid, which fed into the conflict and prolonged things. Alex was trying to stop the Operator, trying to keep the infection contained and prevent the suffering of those already infected, but the conflict he caused made the situation worse instead. TIM, though, is more or less proof that there is a way to continue living life while infected while also minimizing the symptoms - all honesty currently I do not believe this is due to the medication he takes. Brian is also taking these meds throughout the course of the series but they do not seem to make a big impact for him. Tim says he was 'doing fine and getting better' during the GAP he caught between the events of e76/33 and Jay finding (and stalking) him again in e53 <- I think that's because Tim was not actively embroiling himself in the midst of the Operator's influence by seeking to understand, or find answers, or seek revenge; he was going to work, and minding his own business, and keeping himself busy. ANYWAY]

Despite the fact that Tim is doing his best to reason with Alex in e86, Alex's dogged attempts to kill him means that he's having to try to fight Alex off physically. This leads to Alex being stabbed once. After that, Tim backs off for a moment, wavering, but when the Operator shows up in the room, Tim drops the camera and begins stabbing Alex repeatedly. This is due to the Operator's influence (hence why I'm not convinced Tim's medication does anything significant in fending it off, the meds are more or less placebo to me - the Removal of yourself from the midst of conflict and Rejection of the impulse to tangle yourself back into it is what I think makes a difference. Like how with quicksand, fighting it tends to wear you out And drag you deeper down inside of it, whereas keeping calm and stable gives you the opportunity to get out and free yourself. Or maybe like Radiation - the further you get yourself from the Source of it the less Damage you're dealt by it). When Tim finally stops, Alex still pleads with him to get rid of whoever Tim implied Alex to have missed earlier and then kill himself, because he still believes that's the safest course of action. Then, Alex dies. The Operator takes his corpse into the ark.

Tim collapses on the steps at the end of the footage. This is due to the Operator's influence still. Tim is not dead. Marble Hornets isn't a movie, and the channel exists inside the canon of the series - essentially, the way the story Works, the Creators Behind Marble Hornets aren't uploading the entries, the Characters Inside Marble Hornets are (hence what makes it unfiction). We know that Tim isn't dead at the end of this entry because Tim is the one who goes home and uploads the entry to youtube so that the audience is aware of what's going on. Tim is still alive. He is the only one left alive.

BUT. Entry 87. This is where it's Confirmed that Tim did seemingly encounter Jessica after the events showcased in the e76 footage. When Tim woke up lost in the woods, he likely ran into Jessica also lost in the woods, and helped her find her way out and got her an appointment with a doctor just like we saw him try with Jay in e75. Jessica did not die - she's the one Tim was referring to in e86 when he tells Alex 'you missed someone', because Alex also thought that Jess had died and listed her as dead in his monologue. Jessica is alive, and has been getting better because Tim was able to successfully keep her separated from all the bullshit - that's why he tells her that Jay moved. He knows that telling her Jay died would only bring her right back into the midst of things, send her searching on her own quest for answers, and send her spiraling again, so he lies.

We don't know what happens to Tim though. Entry 86 and 87 were uploaded in very close proximity to each other, so it's possible that his seeming set back in symptoms (coughing fit, collapsing, possible seizure) is because he's too close to the center of things. It's also possible that he's struggling to even try pulling himself out of the center of things - that maybe he can't bring himself to cope with the Operator's influence and reach 'remission' at all anymore. It's ambiguous, that's kind of my interpretation of the crossroads at the end of the entry - the one that cuts Right before we know what road Tim took. He could be planning on going back to a 'regular life' - keeping himself out of the conflict and keeping his head down and hopefully succeeding in 'doing fine, and getting better'. OR it's possible that he'll wind up in his own cycle - just like Jay, and Brian, and Alex - making things worse and spiraling and being unable to move on or escape the Operator's influence before it's too late.

Personally though, I do think Tim succeeds at getting better. I think he's done it too many times successfully (after he left adolescent inpatient care, and again after college, and again around the Chronological timeline of season 2) to fall into the glue trap at this point. I think he left Jessica on her own bc the proximity would be too much of a risk in creating a kind of feedback loop, and went back to work, and got a new house, and lives a quiet life as healthily as he can (albeit grieved by what he's lost).

(On the other coin though, in the sequel comics, Jessica is certainly wiggling her way right into the lure all over again ;3c)

!!! And that's the end of Marble Hornets!! I hope this long winded explanation helped to clear things up, and if there's anything that I forgot or something you're still confused about never in a million years do you need to hesitate to ask!! I would be more than happy to explain some more if you'd like ;3c

[that-gay-jedi]

pumpkin— how do you feel about horror movies? do you like psychological thrillers more or jump-scare oriented movies?

I prefer audio horror, but I like horror movies too! I used to watch so many I would get desensitized, take a break from screens to reset, and then watch some more lmao. I'm a bit behind these days because of full time job and my Star Wars obsession eating my whole entire brain forever.

I like practically anything except jump scare based (and the occasional jump scare but I get tired of them quickly and am picky about them lmao). Psychological horror's great, supernatural horror is great, old school monster flicks are great, pure mindfuck horror that plays with your sense of reality, psychosocial type horror like Jordan Peele, meta-horror (like the original Candyman or if Cabin in the Woods had actually been good), etc. I also like a lot of absurdist or existential dread based crap with horror-adjacent messages and themes (think Synecdoche, New York).

In terms of audio horror, I've listened to every free episode of The Nosleep Podcast to date and kept a written list of which stories were particularly good organized by episode and title so I can relisten. I've done the same with the Chilling Tales For Dark Nights podcast. For things that are more serial than anthology, I'd recommend The Orphans (space based scifi survival horror) and my newest obsession, the scifi character-driven drama Give Me Away, which I'm not sure I'd call horror but whenever I pitch it it has a very horror-sounding premise lmao. I also totally went insane for the worldbuilding in The Magnus Archives and made a note of certain episodes of it that are amazing as both standalone pieces and part of the larger story.

I've seen that Give Me Away has exactly zero fanworks on AO3 and someday I want to remedy that with a series of crossover shorts that would double as character studies of our favourite Star Wars characters through the lens of the "radical hospitality" of the alien rescue program from Give Me Away. How their screening process would go, their motivations for volunteering for the program, what traits the personality experts would look for in which prisoner to pair them with, etc.

I already have an Obi-Wan chapter and an Anakin chapter planned out, I'm working on a few of the clone troopers I think might be open to volunteering, and if I ever finish those I'd be doing Padme, Bail Organa, and several of the OT characters next. Eventually if I ever finish all those I'd do some of my Glup Shitto blorbos from sw books like Master and Apprentice, Jedi Trial, Luke Skywalker and the Shadows of Mindor, and the Jedi Quest series lmfao I'm fucking broken as a human being

It is my personal and extremely biased opinion that EVERYONE should listen to Give Me Away (I'm not being paid to promote this and I don't know any of the actors or creators I'm just autistic), it's only like 8 episodes and most of which are like half an hour long but it changed my entire outlook on life in a similar degree to the Star Wars prequels lmao.

[sybilius]

6, 7, 8 & 28 for the ao3 wrapped asks ~

6. Favorite title you used?

you got fuck all clue what the work is has a special place in my heart for both it's clever play on "work" and also because it found its way into the work (hah) of an artist friend whose work I admire :)

7. If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most?

I don't often, but The Mountain Goats! I cribbed the takeover series title from Getting Into Knives. John Darnielle is a poet heh.

8. Pairing you wrote for the most this year?

Takeover (Kenta/Shibata)! A very rewarding pair and I still have a bunch of ghosts in the drafts for them…

28. Favorite work you wrote this year?

That's a tough one, I actually don't think I have a favourite! "branded for madness, born for what's warm" is a genre melding mindfuck couching a soft moment. "white collar chokeout" is a shoot fight as a horny deranged blowjob. And "you got fuck all clue what the work is" is a classic 6 chapter Syb fic where some characters have to hash their shit out under the backdrop of some History. I'm glad I hit a good range this year, love all of them :)

[dykeza]

hiiii ^_^ do you have any bleach fic recs

Haiiii:3 sorry for answering so late I like. Fell asleep and did a midterm this morning ANYWAYS. Bleach fic recs. I’ll put the rating before the title ^-^

My personal favorites::

M - the king of all birds by aosc ; 5/?, Shinji centric, no romantic pairings, graphic depictions of violence

E - Oasis by Mousieta ; 1/1, Shunsui/Jushiro, Shunsui/Jushiro/Kisuke, Kisuke-centric sex-trospection

E - Heaven’s held forever by audiosilver ; 1/1, Nnoitra/Shinji, angst fluff and smut, very flowery/poetic language

E - Avenoir by Glassthroat (members only) ; 1/1, Aizen/Shinji, poetic/flowery language, dubious consent, literal mindfuck 10/10 read

T - Playing Chicken with Divinity by EternalEclipse ; 1/1, Kisuke/Shinji, Shinji-centric story, timeloops and a non-canon bankai for Shinji (but honestly a very good one lends itself to the circle motif very well)

T - Redemption by ChaoticMimzy ; 1/1, Kisuke/Shinji, AU where Mayuri died in TYBW

M - Breathe by Kimarusama ; 1/1, Kisuke/Shinji, Aizen/Shinji, another mindfuck, Kyoka Suigetsu used for dubious purposes

E - Lover’s Quarrel by assbeloathed ; 4/4, modern AU, conditional/circumstantial immortality, Aizen/Shinji, major character death and violence

E - the insanity of hearts by Mellanmir ; 1/1, Kisuke/Mayuri, blood and gore and a bunch of other fucked up shit, very very violent like genuinely, tagged “graphic descriptions of sex” which always cracks me up

E - Release by imlikat ; 1/1, Kisuke/Mayuri, special mention as it is the first Kisyuri fic posted to ao3, mildly dubious consent, BEAUTIFULLY written it’s so good

Shameless self plug::

E - BARTENDIN’ [drunkenly] by Dykeza ; 1/1, Kisuke/Shinji, I wrote this so I am Biased but I do think it’s a good fic (mutual approved), drinking and drugs and exhibitionism

Stories I like but would not recommend per-say::

E - The Language of Flowers by YamotosSenpai ; 14/14, Kisuke/Shinji, it’s the language of flowers hilariously dated and rather embarrassing, but very good nonetheless

E - No one but you by orphan_account ; 1/1, Kisuke/Shinji, mildly dubious consent, posted on my birthday in 2012 so I was rather horrified because this pairing that I like had fanfictions written when I was still in the single digits, first English urashin fic posted to ao3

E - Ruthless by mochajeeja ; 5/5, Kisuke/Aizen, I (shamefully) admit that I cried reading this, graphic depictions of violence, Meiji Era 1870’s AU, kidnapping and imprisonment. Yhwach is there.

E - Detained by Fluffychanel ; 21/21, part of a series, Kisuke/Aizen, the Aizen mpreg fanfiction that has inspired my entire descent into madness, literally you can blame Detained for every cursed thing I’ve ever spoken about on this blog

[themonotonysyndrome]

The series is called the mindfuck.

It’s about Lana who’s a serial killer, making her way down the list of people who hurt her and killed her brother when she meets Logan who’s a FBI agent trying to catch her. They fall in love

Provoking title! And the premise got that 'enemies-to-lover' vibe so perfectly

[toriz0]

WWE All-Stars (2011) Dream Match ratings based on how accurate the comparison is

Warrior vs. Sheamus - Sheamus isn't a homophobic piece of shit so jot that down first. This wasn't really true of early Sheamus, he was strong but he was a chickenshit heel, but post-Gunther series it's pretty fitting, 7/10

Eddie vs. Rey - Rey's legacy in WWE is so painted and shaped by Eddie's passing, even to this day (his feud with his own son was about Dominic saying that Eddie was cooler). 9/10

Steamboat vs. Kofi - i guess this was fair in 2011 when Kofi was just the high flying midcarder, but nowadays he's part of the most successful team in WWE history and had the fairytale championship run Steamboat never did, 2/10

Perfect vs. Miz - pretty apt, very different styles but privileged vanity is the core of both characters, though Miz has the chip on his shoulder that makes his character more complex than Perfect's. both also are associated with the Intercontinental title, 6/10

Andre vs. Big Show - Show started his career as the kayfabe son of Andre, they've always been linked. both were also in 10/10 movies (The Princess Bride and the Waterboy). 10/10

Austin vs. Punk - alcoholism vs. straight edge being the sticking point here is so weird looking back, but this was pre-pipe bomb. "unmatched fighting skills" is very funny since Punk went 0-2 in UFC. as for which is a better role model, at least Punk only punched his bosses, 9/10

Hart vs. Edge - Edge wrestles a decently technical style but his matches are about his cunning more than his technical prowess, also ngl putting him against Hart does him no favors as a comparison, Hart was an absolute master of his craft and Edge was always less skillful than Christian. both are Canadian though. 4/10

Roberts vs. Orton - both really embody their snake motifs, working slowly and methodically before their snappy finishing blows. it's just that Jake the Snake is better in every single way and it's not close, 8/10

Slaughter vs. Swagger - you can tell that they wanted Angle to be Jack's counter, and they just scrounged up the most patriotic wrestler they could think of. should've been Lance Storm, 3/10

Hogan vs. Cena - politicking, patriotic supermen marketed to kids. the connections run so deep that in his mindfuck hellscape Persona dimension one of his greatest anxieties is turning Hollywood like Hogan did. that's not a non-sequiter, check out the Firefly Funhouse match at WrestleMania 2020. 10/10

Savage vs. Morrison - hated this at first but honestly fair. the sunglasses, the boot tassles, the elaborate entrance gear, Savage is 10 times the promo Morrison was/is but they both hold very unique physical charisma. 7/10

Snuka vs. Kane - they just wanted these guys in the game. they're both awful, awful human beings though. 0/10

Rock vs. Haitch - the Undisputed Champion thing seems really arbitrary considering how much these guys actually have in common. so much shared history, both having failed gimmicky runs before morphing into defining figures of the Attitude Era. 6/10

Roddy vs. McIntyre. Roddy Piper was Canadian. 0/10

Michaels vs. Undertaker - it always annoyed me that Shawn's ugly as sin DX gear was his default in this game. it's fitting, they probably have more direct comparisons but for how influential they were in each other's careers it makes sense. both are also from Texas. 8/10

[dumb-little-baby]

Leak the book title

The mindfuck series by s.t abby

[captnjacksparrow]

Why do I ship SNS?

It is a known fact that when people experience a good media, they like to discuss various things they liked, hated, interpret what the creator trying to say and get something from what they have consumed. Eventually people end up in a shipping war if there are multiple possibilities. 

I started watching Naruto on a whim, hoping to see some ninjas in action with some revenge as a background (after all when you have power, there will always be a revenge). Am a sucker for revenge, btw. I am a person who hates romance in media. Because, every movie, book, novel, series has this same recycled romance plastered into every story even though the story don’t need at all. So, I am very tired of it. Every media portrays romance as something inevitable, necessary and something we can’t live without. That’s wrong. 

Usually, romance goes like this... Person A sees Person B... they hate each other and add some possessiveness, jealousy... they magically gets attracted through some shared experiences eventually... they kiss and make babies. There’s nothing wrong with this. It’s just very tiring as I’ve seen million forms of this same repeated trope. I always cringe and yell “Can you give us something different? Grrr.....”.

And also, my motto is that love can happen with any person. It can’t be restrained into certain boundaries. So, I don’t like to put some relationship under an umbrella called Gay, Lesbian, Straight or whatever. Of course, illicit relationships and incest are not normal and am not okay with it.

With all that being said...

My experience after watching the Shippuden series until episode 478 was “Wait, do they love each other?”. I know am very late to realize this, but I have never even viewed them with any romantic lens throughout. 

On my first watch, I was always under the impression that “They are friends”... But there are certain moments I felt “Wait, why are they doing like this which could’ve been handled in a different way!!” I will get to this later in this post. But those moments were overlooked by me because of my curiosity of “What happens next ??”. 

And on my rewatch, it only confirmed my view. 

The other popular ships like SS and NH put forth many points to invalidate what SNS represents. The most common being “They are reincarnated brothers” or  “They are best friends”. Am just going to debunk them from my point of view. 

Naruto and Sasuke are like brothers.....

Nope. 

The best brotherhood title, in this series, should officially go to Itachi and Sasuke. 

You can argue as much as you want that Itachi mindfucked Sasuke and killed his parents....yaada yaada.... 

It is repeatedly shown why Itachi put a curtain on his own clan. The reason is, Uchiha clan decided to forcefully take over the village. No matter how much innocent you are, you cannot take over something with force. Dot. I will write about this in a separate post.

In short, Sasuke realised how his clan members were wrong after hearing the story from the First Hokage, Hashirama Senju. That’s why he openly proclaimed “I am going to protect Konoha and become Hokage”. 

Back to the topic, Itachi and Sasuke are blood brothers. If I ship them both, then what you claim is very valid. 

The above gif says, “Sasuke, I know, I made a mistake by filling you with hatred. But whatever you decide to do from now on, I will love you always”. Meaning, He stopped treating Sasuke as a kid and accepts that Sasuke has his own path to walk.

This is exactly how brothers behave. I would do the same to my kid sister. You can see a fraternal instinct from Itachi’s eyes realizing that this is their last time together.

Another thing, Brothers trope always has this hierarchy.... Protect the younger sibling no matter what. It is evident from Madara/Izuna and Hashirama/Tobirama.

Not convinced?

If you pull the Indra and Ashura bullshit, let me tell you one thing. Indra and Ashura were separated and formed their own clan long ago. They eventually branched off into Uchiha and Senju clans. No way you can relate a century old blood relation as brothers. It’s just their chakra got reincarnated over and over. 

Don’t pull up an incest angle between Naruto and Sasuke. Because they never shared a womb. Dot. 

Naruto and Sasuke are Best Friends only.

You know what, you are almost right. I thought that for a very long time. Remember I never wore any shipping goggles ON. 

There are two types of best friend categories. Best Friends without a reason and Best Friends through rivalry. 

Best Friends without a reason in Narutoverse are: Shikamaru/Choji. 

They just became friends and became BFF. They won’t fight or hurt each other. But when you have something to share...you would go to that person and share everything honestly.

Best Friends through Rivalry: Kakashi/Obito, Hashirama/Madara, Naruto/Sasuke

I really cannot provide more proof for the first two pairings as Best Friends as it is not the scope of this post. Although the latter two also qualifies for shipping category. Why?

Because, the common thing among them is that all the three Uchihas awakened/reawakened their Sharingan for their best friend. But Hashirama/Madara and Naruto/Sasuke are the only pairings to awaken or evolve Sharingan when trying to break their bonds with each other. 

Special Brownie points for Madara. He had 4 brothers and lost 3 but still couldn’t awaken his Sharingan but when trying to break up with Hashirama, his eyes were brimming red. 

Sasuke’s Sharingan matures in the first Valley of The End.

That’s why I excluded Hashirama/Madara and Naruto/Sasuke from this Best Friends list.

Because to the both Uchihas, the other person meant something special which cannot be comprehended into a mere term called ‘Best Friends’.

Which is exactly why Kakashi/Obito would perfectly fall into this category.

The way they quarrel, fight with each other, protect each other are perfect scores for a friendship. What makes them best friends is when Obito decided to give his Sharingan despite Kakashi was always putting a cold air around him and most importantly asked him to protect his love ‘Rin’. Also Kakashi carried his friend’s will to his heart and passed on to Team 7.

It all falls under ‘In the memory of my Best Friend’ trope.

Obito may be a trash but he is a good friend. Because after Rin was killed, he massacred everyone around him except for Kakashi. He could have killed him. Understandable. Or he could have plucked his Sharingan back (because he literally plucked most of the Sharingans from the Uchiha clan massacre and kept those eyes as a reserve). This could have enabled him to use Susanoo. I believe Susanoo can only be used with Mangekyo Sharingan in both eyes. But for some reason, he didn’t. 

So what makes me think Naruto and Sasuke love each other, not as a brother and not as a friend but something beyond which I can’t term?

My way of shipping is not about marriage, sex and rearing babies. Because literally everyone does this as an obligation. 

So, I don’t ship them in terms of living together in my headcanon and having sex daily. Nope. But it is not wrong though if you ship in that sense.

In this Narutoverse, Women are just some stow away pieces whose sole existence is to fawn over their dreamboy and cry for them. (Usually literally nothing useful comes out of them). Me being a girl, as much as I hate this setup but I have come to terms with whatever it is and have accepted it. If you are a girl looking for a strong female character...... this is not the place. Watch something else. 

But I draw inspiration from male characters who are characterized deeply for which I have to applaud the creator. Reason being, the very first character which I connected with was Itachi. It was when Sasuke thinks about his past with his family in the flashback before the first VotE battle in part I. I will be writing a separate post about Itachi in this week. 

In short, If you are a person who wants inspiration, draw it from male characters. Not in a single moment, you stoop so low for characters like Hinata and Sakura. That’s not how I envision myself or any woman. Dot.

With all this being said, I ship them as a couple who necessarily don’t have to get married or have sex... But they each other has some special allowance towards each other in their hearts which no one can touch, not even their wives or children. 

This doesn’t mean I accept what came after episode 478 as they are literally something they made for $$$$$. 

There are some basic traits which are absolutely necessary for a ship to sail successfully. They are Acknowledgement, Reason, No Hierarchy, Influence, Owning each others rights and Privilege. (All these reasons should come from both the sides for the ship to be worthy)

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

Acknowledgement, I mean here, is to accept and acknowledge what they are to each other.

They both agree that they are Bonded/Friends verbally as well as emotionally.

To me, this is essential in any relationship especially for the ones you are trying to ship. I didn’t see this in any other ships like SS or NH where it is always one sided. Sakura confessed before the village entrance to which Sasuke said “You really are annoying!!”. Hinata proposed in Pain arc. Naruto didn’t even acknowledge her confession. He went on to beg for pardon for Sasuke. Again she proposed in the War at the expense of Love Cupid “Neji”. Naruto went on to joke with Minato that Sakura is his Girl Friend. 

If I were in both of these girls place, I would literally be mad and drop this shit right away.

Wheras in SNS, I saw both the people I am trying to ship were asking “What am I to you?”, to which they reply “You are my friend”. To me this is very important.

Reason

To those who are saying “Love is blind”, “Love is Madness”, “Love needs no reason”, you all need self-evaluation. This is not some K Drama situation where you don’t need any reason. You should know why you love someone and why you need the other’s presence.

Naruto’s reason is very simple.

I could provide many reasons. But here, Sasuke, without any reservations... knowing full well of the consequence if he feed Naruto but still extended the helping hand to someone who was always hostile. It is just like what Iruka did. And many incidents which happened during Land of the Waves arc are evident.

He wanted to be friends with this lonely Uchiha boy way back when he was around 7 or 8 for a simple reason that he understands his pain more than anyone. But he really became friends when they were grouped together for Team 7.  

Sasuke’s reason goes even way beyond when Naruto series started.

“Because he felt relief”.

Imagine a young boy who witnessed a massacre before his eyes and lost everyone he loved. But somehow another young boy of his age made him feel relieved. This explains why Sasuke went all out of his way to make friendship with Naruto despite being aloof. 

Isn’t this what we want from someone we love?  

Rather than being completely insensitive about an orphan life or just stalking from the distance and never offered any support, I would prefer someone who understands my pain from their heart and try to reach me. Sasuke reached out to him by offering the lunch and Naruto reached out to him by making him his rival and bug him.

NO HIERARCHY

This is pretty self-explanatory. Unlike blood brothers, there should be no hierarchy in a relationship I want to ship. 

We saw Naruto yells at Sasuke many times absolutely for no reason, despite Sasuke bearing this cold attitude. Probably he is the only person who can call him by such variety of names. 

Sasuke always calls him by his trademark ‘Usuratonkachi’. Sometimes he calls him fool just like everyone. But was never insulting or mean towards Naruto. Except for that time in the final battle, he made fun of his Shadow Clone jutsu citing his loneliness. 

In short, be it a physical fight or verbal offense.... neither of them wilts like a flower. They equally give back. 

The only other person who can verbally assault Sasuke is Karin and probably the only girl who never addresses him as “Sasuke-Kun”. 

U-SU-RA-TON-KA-CHI..... Why do Sasuke spend such an effort to call someone with a 6 syllabic word, instead NA-RU-TO, a 3 syllabic word which is way more convenient to call?? I always wonder.

POSITIVE INFLUENCE

I don’t have to spell out anything here. There are many obvious examples but will try to keep it short. 

Naruto became strong because of Sasuke. He trained hard for 3 years with Jiraiya , a month with Kakashi developing Rasen Shuriken and controlled Kurama’s power with Killer Bee. Except for Sage Mode jutsu everything he learnt was all for bringing Sasuke back. 

In short, Sasuke is Naruto’s predominant strength. 

Though Naruto was not the source of strength for Sasuke, but he brings out many vibrant emotions in Sasuke which he really needed for his traumatic mind otherwise he would always be that cold angry brooding doll without any emotions and I am sure Sasuke enjoys to banter with Naruto.

LOL!!! I don’t know why Sasuke feels competitve here. It’s pretty childish even for Sasuke.

Friendly tease :-) I think he also protected Sakura in this scene. He can also ask her the same, isn’t it? I mean as a friend. 

The best one is yet to come

It’s incredibly hilarious to see how Sasuke pouts when he was with Naruto. Sakura!!!! You third wheeling joker :-D :-D

Throughout Shippuden, Sasuke never shows his emotions with anyone. He either looks very cold or angry.

Reminiscing his Team 7 days, for a split second. 

Probably the only positive emotion is this, in all of the Shippuden. I mean not counting Episode 478.

I don’t think Sakura brought any kind emotions in Sasuke except annoyance when they were together in Team 7. Or Hinata too. These girls just moan “Sasuke-Kun”, “Naruto-Kun” but brings nothing to the table. Total wastrels!!!!!

OWNING EACH OTHER’S RIGHTS

This section is exactly where SNS moves on to a whole different level.

Sasuke wanted to inflict his pain over everyone who lives in peaceful Konoha for what it did to Itachi. (though I don’t really accept with Sasuke here since he never even bothered to question about his clan’s history, but what he was doing is understandable. Just like Naruto tells him).

But the context here is Sasuke is on a murder rampage. Starting from the Kage Summit, killing Danzo, unnecessarily hurting Karin and almost reached a point where he could not be stopped anymore. Then Ms.Annoying appears. She literally have no fucking clue what Sasuke is going through. So started to spout nonsense that she wanted to go with Sasuke-Kun with an ulterior motive to kill him without a strong resolve. 

The interesting SS dynamics here is Sasuke asks Sakura “Do you know what I want?” and to which she gives a carefree-shitty-pathetic answer “I don’t care. I will do whatever you want”. Geez!!!

If I were Sasuke, I would think, “This person standing before me don’t even care about what I want but coming with an intent to kill me and not only that... she is a kunoichi from Konoha where I planned to inflict my pain by slaughtering them.. I better ram my Chidori and be done with it”... He doesn’t see her as his former Teammate. He just want to kill that person.

However, Kakashi deflects the attack and saves Ms.Useless. 

( Me : I am a Sasuke fan through and through. But, Sakura..... You always says you will do this, do that.... But you never succeed at anything... Why is that? Why are you even continue being a ninja? No one asked you to kill Sasuke, you decided to. But why don’t you kill him. Probably you would’ve earned my begrudging respect... Pffft” ****sighs with a heavy second hand embarassment)

Anyways, Sasuke becomes an unstoppable maniac at this point because he was very irritated on seeing Kakashi and Sakura spouting some unreachable nonsense. So he started to attack Kakashi as he is even more irritated on seeing his Sharingan.

Again, Ms.Idiot wants to kill Sasuke when he is at his weakest point due to chakra exhaustion and that too from behind his back. (You!!! Gutless wrench). Sasuke sensed this and attempted to kill her again... (Naruto!!! You idiot. Why did you save her...)

However, Naruto appears and saves her. Naruto and Sasuke’s eyes meet each other.

But somehow Sasuke calmed down and hears out Naruto for what he has to say. He says, “Whatever you are doing until now, it’s understandable”. 

Kakashi wanted to kill him and Sasuke got riled up and prepare his Chidori. Anyways, Naruto intervenes and they go to some meta physical plane and talks privately. And Naruto comes up with his idea and announces as below:

Me: Naruto!!!! Sweety..... Do you realize that you have a big dream of becoming a Hokage which you have been shouting from Day 1? But still you want to overthrow everything for that one person who is in unbearable pain. It’s alright. But you don’t want to go alone or send him alone. No Best friend would go this far. And to those Sakura shippers.... Why didn’t Sakura try to bear the burden? Why didn’t she come up with this Idea? Afterall, you spout nonsense like ‘Sakura saved Sasuke from Darkness, isn’t it?’ And, Naruto.... Who gave you the right to take his hatred and shoulder the burden? And what makes you think you are that only person to do it??? Sasuke, might have other special person in those 3 years. How can you decide on Sasuke’s behalf??? Aren’t you going overboard ?

The answer to all the above is simple, Naruto can risk anything for Sasuke. And he clearly knew that Sasuke’s only living bond is him.

And what happened next was almost unbelievable and for the first time I thought ‘What is it with these two guys?’. 

Sasuke agrees with Naruto’s proposition to not destroy Konoha before fighting with Naruto. 

Me: Sasuke!!!! You have every right to reject his proposition. Since, he was not in your life for the past 3 years, your side of bond with Naruto should have been cut-off long back, right? Sasuke??? Well, at this point he was just your former Team 7 member. You don’t need to honor your proposition. You can attack Konoha anytime. Why did you accept?

Also Me: Sweety!!! Why do you always question Naruto ‘Who am I to you’? Why do you need his opinion always? There is an annoying princess standing behind Naruto vying for your attention. And yet you didn’t even ask her this question at any time. But before Naruto, you completely calmed down from your rampage and willing to wait for what he has to say plus asking for his validation. After all you don’t care about anything, why just Naruto???

And the reason being, Naruto is still his closest bond which he couldn’t cut off despite trying very hard. After all, Many years ago, Sasuke was the one, who readily jumped in to protect Naruto knowing full well that it’s a trap. He was ready to throw away his revenge for this boy back then. Sasuke is afraid that he will give in to this bond once more and Naruto is his weakness which he wants to eliminate so badly.

This is definitely not any Best Friend would do..... Fix that in your mind.

The purpose of these GIFs is not show how protective Sasuke is..... Well, I can talk about it all day. Let’s save it.

Me: Yo!!!! Sasuke..... You wanted to kill Naruto.... You said so yourself under the bridge. Meaning, He is the only person standing between your goal and your resolve and Naruto is always known to weaken your resolve. And yet why are you protecting him here? There is absolutely no need. Because, if there is a situation like Kaguya where both of you are must needed to save this world , then there is a reason to save him. But why now? Plus do you know, if Naruto dies, then Madara’s plan may not succeed because if a Jinchuriki dies, tailed beast also dies. It is perfect for your Revolution, isn’t it? Who gave you the right to own his life? Obito has his reason to kill Naruto, why not let him?Why is it that you want to personally remove him from your life? If he is dead by an external factor, you can carry on your path without any interference and pain. Why go so far to protect him ?

The answer is Sasuke values Naruto’s life more than his own even during his Team 7 days. He has this high esteem for Naruto and almost consider it to be a shame if some worthless fool takes his life. And Sasuke never hated Naruto. He once hated Itachi and his resolve to kill was real and intense. But when Orochimaru asked him to kill 1000 people for practice, Sasuke never killed anyone. He even implemented no kill policy for his team “Hebi”. So, someone like Sasuke who never liked to kill random innocent people, how could he let some trash take away a life, he considers dearly to the same level of Itachi? That’s why in this situation, his body moved on his own to protect something special for him. He may not agree it, but he always shows it.

But some other ship wankers try to say Sasuke may have said “You are annoying” but inside he deeply loved her which is why he was smiling. If so, Why didn’t Sasuke never showed his care not even once? He not only tried to kill her twice when she was defenseless but also let her die twice or didn’t bother at all during the war. Or show me where these soul level connection happened between SS or NH

In short, Sasuke and Naruto own each other’s rights unconsciously. Because they are the only ones who can understand each other’s soul which nobody can reach.

Me: Oh, by the way Sasuke, I think Susanoo should be used like this. You really don’t need your hand to protect Naruto. Susanoo can do it’s work for you. Minato would be proud though!!!!

PRIVILEGE

Most of the points I written above are in and of itself is a privilege they give for each other and not for anyone else. Privilege is essential in a ship. Because it shows how different a loved one is from normal people. 

For Naruto, 

I originally want to put how he begs for forgiveness on Sasuke’s behalf before Raikage and weeps immeasurably before hyperventilating. But this one trumps the other. Naruto literally broadcasted everyone how important Sasuke is to him and how he regretted not offering his friendship at that time and how he couldn’t stop Sasuke from reaching Orochimaru. 

If you want to inspire Alliance shinobi forces, you should have shown how you worked so hard from the bottom to top. Projecting Sasuke as your regret and inspiring people shows how deeply you prioritize this person which affects you after so many years and hence, you don’t want any more regrets. 

It’s very unconventionally romantic which passes the shipping category in flying colours. 

For Sasuke,

The following is the Land of the waves arc which was novelized in the name of Innocent Heart, Demonic Blood released in 2006. 99.9% of the material is exactly as it happens in Manga/Anime. 

This is the privilege Sasuke provides for Naruto. “ But coming from Sasuke, It almost counted as a hug”... 

BROWNIE POINTS:

Now, the following are the scenes which add a mysterious flavour to this ship. I sincerely don’t understand why Kishimoto put this. I mean I am absolutely happy with it, but why? What was he thinking while drawing these scenes? 

It’s also strange that, whenever they clash a Chidori with Rasengan..... They always gets repelled to their own sides and fall with a loud thump. But Naruto’s posture looks very perfect, I mean it looks like someone carried him and laid him down. Anyways, What’s Sasuke doing on Naruto’s side?? He should have fell on the opposite side. Why didn’t he walk away? There is absolutely no reason for Sasuke to come over to Naruto’s side and have an intense meaningful gaze. 

This is another mysterious plus intense scene. I am still wondering, Is this really Sasuke? He is a person who avoids casual touches with anyone other than his brother. I’ve seen so many times Sasuke rejecting hugs from Sakura. I can’t even imagine what Kishimoto was thinking. 

If you people pass these scenes off as Brotherhood or Best Friend chemistry... Then you lack basic human emotions. That’s all. 

Me: Well, Sasuke, If you really want to kill him, you should have shovelled your sword right through Naruto’s vital point when you made that exuberant landing. There is literally no need for you to draw a long sword in close quarters. And what about the Personal Space??? With your speed, you can land without leaning on Naruto’s shoulders... 

Also Me: Yo, Naruto... You were panicking when Sai does the same....but you don’t even flinch when Sasuke invades your personal space????

Anyways, it’s funny that both the intense scenes I have mentioned here were initiated by Sasuke. Quite strange and thrilling.

So, to conclude.... All these scenes I have mentioned  made me unconsciously ship them as a pair. With all these being said, I believe all the ingredients for a good romance were laid perfectly. A moment of impulsive tension or affection, say a hug, between them after a difficult battle could mess with both and make a romance happen. And I don’t think either of them will deny especially Sasuke. 

I don’t see any of this aspect in other popular ships such as SS and NH. If I am Sakura or Hinata in this universe, I will not be okay with my pair doing all these things with other person. I intentionally left scenes from Episode 478 as it is so intense and require a separate post. I am happy that even without Episode 478, SNS ship sails high. So, I believe both Sakura and Hinata are still fourth wheeling their respective pairs in Boruto universe also, I guess. 

P.S: I don’t watch Boruto

Final memento:

No way a friend will look this mesmerized on seeing the other one. 

[gremlin-writes-angst]

Possessively in Love

Chapter 1 Here!

Chapter 2

1.9k words

Trigger warning: Cursing

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The Bakusquad has recently had lots of free time so they’ve gotten to hang out together, and as Bakugou assumed, Shinsou was now a part of their group. Because of that Bakugou has become a lot more touchy-feely with Denki, which isn't a problem for him. Denkis top love language is physical touch, but he also feels annoying when he’s the only one initiating it with his friends, so it's nice to have someone else be the needy one. Currently, they were doing random slide shows, a trend they saw on TikTok. Jirou went first, she rated everyone's music taste. She said it was unfair to grade herself so the winner was Sero, she said it was the most consistent and matched Seros vibe, Shinsou placed second, Jirou likes his taste but the number of angsty songs concerned her. Mina placed third, her music taste wasn't something for Jirou but she could admit it was still valid. Bakugou was placed in fourth because his music was inconsistent his playlist was a combo of screamo and classical music and jumping between them hurt Jirou’s brain when listening to the back and forth. Not a shocker but Denki placed in dead last, Jirou just couldn't listen to the gummy bear song, or barbie girl or the coconut song, or heeeeeyyyyy man song, which were all songs on his playlist. Mina’s presentation was about how everyone should try out dancing, the thing was that she was blackmailing them, each slide was one of her friends and she would look at them and talk in hints that she would expose a secret she had of theirs. Denkis was titled “ why I should be allowed alone in the kitchen” and it did the opposite of what Denki wanted it to do, every slide was “ even though I burnt down the kitchen…”  he had proved to them that he needs to be chaperoned. 

Denki Pov

“ So have I convinced you, will you guys stop shadowing me in the kitchen.”

 I read the last slide to the group, I was pretty proud of my arguments. 

“ Not a chance in hell.” Jirou

“What side were you even arguing for bro?” Sero

“I was rooting for you bro, but I don’t think I can anymore.” Kirishima

“From what you just showed me I think it’s safe I agree with the people who witnessed it, I can offer to be your kitchen chaperone though.” 

Shinsous words made me blush, he just offed to watch my every move, which I think he already does. He hadn’t been around for all the kitchen fire so maybe he doesn’t understand how well he would have to watch me. Yeah, that makes more sense than someone wanting to watch me, I’m not the most entertaining person.

“That’s my job Zombie bitch, so find a different one. Dunceface!”

Bakugou waved for me to sit down next to him, that and his protective words make me feel special. I wince at the name but still walk to sit in his right, between him and Shinsou but he grabs my waist and moves me to his left so I’m in between him and the armrest. His hand rests on my lower back.

“ Bakugou, your acting a little protective of Denki.”

Jirou mention, and though I agree I wished she wouldn’t mention it cause he’ll probably stop and I like the feeling I get when he protects me.

“Yeah, you act like his dad or something.” 

Sero mentions, I don’t see it that way, I hope he doesn’t see me as his son.

“Shut up you idiots!”

Bakugou says in a harsh tone but at a speaking level, not yelling or anything.

“Yeah bro, he’s too young to be a Denkis dad, he’s more like a brother, Bakubro, that could be your new nickname”

Kirishima said with a look of focus on his face, this was series for him.

“You’re totally right Kiri, he’s like the older protective brother in romances, and the younger sibling ends up dating his best friend or worst enemy, and they have to keep it a secret.”

I don’t think I like older brother any more than dad, I don’t want Bakugou to treat me like family.

“Ok let’s move on guys, Bakubro you want to go?”

Shinsou seemed to be purposely irritating Bakugou, I would have thought it was funny if the joke wasn’t about him being my brother.

“Fuck no, why don’t you go Mr.hypnosis?”

“Fine by me, let me get set up.“

While Shinsou got ready, I felt Bakugou pull me closer, or I think he did, it could just be my imagination.

“Ok welcome to my slide show, Why I would be a great boyfriend.”

I think Shinsou picked kind of a weird topic, I mean why make a slide show about being a good boyfriend in front of people that he would never date. I tried to pay attention but I didn’t want to, it makes me feel lonely to hear people talk about dating, even if it’s hypothetical. I start to nod off, I normally don’t fall asleep this early, but it makes sense today because I took a test in class so I couldn’t take my nap today, and Shinsou’s voice is just so soothing.

Bakugou

“ Yeah, you act like his dad or something.” 

Sero must have thought that it was funny to add on, it wasn’t.

“Shut up you idiots!”

I wasn’t going to listen to these extras talk about me being related to Denki, fuckin idiots, I thought I hide my crush well, but I didn’t know I was such a great fucking actor that they think were related.

“Yeah guy, he’s too young to be Denki’s dad, he’s more like a brother, Bakubro, that could be your new nickname.”

I was glad Shittyhair stopped them, but then he called me “Bakubro” he would be dead right now if I wasn’t worried about Shinsou taking my spot if I moved, I ain’t letting that mindfucker near Denki.

“You’re totally right Kiri, he’s like the older protective brother in romances, and the younger sibling ended up dating his best friend or worst enemy, and they have to keep it a secret.”

Of fucking course I know that troupe but I imagined myself as the boyfriend not the asshole of a brother.

“Ok let’s move on guys, Bakubro you want to go?”

I know what this mother fucker is tru=ing to get my spot and sit with Denki, not on my watch.

“Fuck no, why don’t you go Mr. Hypnostis?”

That’s right fuck your plan, go present about your cats or some shit.

“Fine by me, let me get set up.”

Why the hell does he seem happy about this, I’m the one next to Denki, pull him just a little closer to make sure he’s still there, he is. Which means I’m the winner in this situation, what does this bastard have planned?

“ Ok welcome to my slide show, Why I would be a great boyfriend.”

Oh nothing to be worried about, he thought he was doing something. Well guess what general studies boy, this won’t convince Denki of shit, and it wouldn’t matter because I wouldn’t let you get close enough to even ask him out. Though I’m not worried I’m still pissed, most of what he is presenting is bullshit or it inst enough, just proving to me that he doesn’t deserve Denki. He doesn’t even deserve to think he could h date Denki, he didn’t have the right to imply that the “significant other” was Denki, he doesn’t deserve to even lo-- who the fuck is touching me, oh its Denki. He’s using me as a pillow, I would never let anybody use me, but this was different this was nice. It also meant that Denki didn’t give a shit about Shinsou’s presentation, so it’s a win-win for me. I look at the sleeping angel on my shoulder, then I look up and make eye contact with the fucken bitch presenting, I don’t even try to hide the smug look on my face, keeping eye contact I pull Denki as close to me as I can, he’s warm, and I like that. I see purple brain’s face falter for a second, but then he continues his presentation with a little less enthusiasm than earlier. When he’s done presenting, he leaves, probably too jealous to be around me, as he should be. The rest of the extras do their slide show, Hair for brains does his on manliness, Sero showed off everyday items but they were made of his tape, I’ve seen him use some of the items, like the tape mug he uses every god damn mourning. I convinced the group of extras to let me stay where I was sitting for the presentation because Denki was still on my shoulder and I wasn’t about to remove him from it. My presentation was called “ how to cook you dipshits” one of my slides was actually dedicated to Denki and his strange skill of burning down the kitchen, I think it’s a little funny that my and his slides were connected. 

Since I was the last one, and it was almost curfew time, everyone went to their rooms. I stayed for a little longer, still enjoying the warmth Denki was giving off. Eventually, it was a curfew so I carefully moved Denki off me, got up, and picked him up. I made it to his dorm room, but when I went to open it, I found it locked. I searched Denki for the key but I found none, while I was trying to figure out what to do Denki whispered.

“ Are we gonna have a sleepover Baku?”

Hearing just the begging of my last name was a little weird but it was also cute, only cute cause he did it.

“Only if you want idiot.”

Denki groaned in my arms.

“Of course I do.”

I whispered an ok but I think he fell back asleep before he heard it. I carried him to my room, and the closer I got to my room the heavier he seemed. So when I got to the door I set him down and leaned him against the wall, so I could open the door. While I was distracted Denki fell over and there was a soft thud. I panicked but relaxed when I saw he was fine. I heard a creak from the door next to me. I look up and there stands my new insomniac neighbor, Shinsou.

“What are you doing with Kaminari?”

His voice was more serious than normal, as if I was doing something wrong, it pissed me off.

“I’m bringing him to a bed.”

“Why not bring him to his own bed then?”

“ Because his door was locked and I couldn’t find the key, then he said he wanted to a sleepover. Does that check out with you officer?”

“Why would he want to have a sleepover with you?’

I was done with his accusing tone.

“ Because we’re friends, and in the past when we had sleepovers he was happy, oh or maybe it’s because I give him the best damn cuddles he could ever need. Now excuse me but I’m going to bed cause I’m fucking tired.”

I pick up Denki and bring him into my room and place him on my bed, I was unsure if I should get in the bed with him, but when he started patting the bed as if he was looking for someone, I decided to be that someone, even if I’m not the one he was looking for.

All characters belong to Horikoshi and his series Boku No Hero Academia

[bookslifeandeverythingelse]

I wish I could say that I liked the “Loki” series 100% and that everything met my expectations, it didin’t happened. Not spoiler free.

Loki’s character: he is not the prince from the first “Thor” movie, but he is not the Loki from “Avengers”, it makes sense and I appreciate that they realised that he can’t be the young prince, since he had go through all that Thanos did to him, but he can’t be the dangerous alien invader, since the Hulk had done some recalibration and Loki is not under the influence of the Mind Stone (he wasn’t completely controlled like Clint, but he wasn’t his own self either). On top of this, Loki had to suffer through the reel from the TVA and the knowldge that he is just one of the many Lokis that had spurted in the timeline. He must be under such a severe shock, whithout having the chance to work through it, since he is in an hostile environment. I liked that they tried to keep account of all of this, and not just write this Loki as a blueprint of "Avengers" Loki. What I didn't like was that he was still bent on conquering a kingdom, that was from whatever mindfuck Thanos subjected him to, Loki had never wanted the throne (he said so during the fist "Thor"). It would have been more in character to have him try to find the truth and fight for free will, but this storyline was given to Sylvie, unfortunately. What I loated was having Loki admitting that he was a narcisisst, he is not one! He is the son of a narcisisst, who will try anything to receive a crumble of his narc father's affection, this doesn't make him a narcisisst!

I have mixed feelings towards Sylvie. I like that she is competent and that she has a plan, I don't like that the show that is named "Loki", became the "Loki & Sylvie" show. I perfectly understand that all those TV shows are stepping stones towards MCU phase 4, but neither "WandaVision" nor "Fatws", sidelined their main characters, to achieve this. I would not have minded Loki meeting Sylvie, in a way to intoduce her for the next MCU projects, but I am here for Loki and his journey, not to have a good storyline for him, given to another character. After the first episode, I hoped to see Loki learning to understand himself and grow from all that happened to him. Instead he had to follow Sylvie around, appearing to be less competent, than what he actually is, otherwise he would have overshadowed her. I understand that Loki has had a more cocooned life than Sylvie had, he didn't have to run all his life and had to become street smart (he had to suffer through dufferent things tho), but he had been bought up as a prince, he must have studied war, strategy and diplomacy and this doesn't show, at all, he just follows Sylvie around and his only plan is to reign in the TVA; really writers? Really? They could have done more with him, showing us that yes, he is more book smart, but still on the same level of Sylvie. They could have explored Loki and free will and Loki and the knowledge that he is one of many and what might do to his psyche. But they choose the simple way. Pity.

Loki's magic is a sore point. He has been downpowered through all the movies and it would be strange to have him show magic left and right out of the blue but, if the show had really been focusing on Loki, we would have seen him using his powers more, since he is away from Asgard toxic influence (like what happened to Classic!Loki) and free to use his seidr, instead of using other means in a fight and in his life. But this first half of the show (it the tweet is true), had been hellbent on sidelining him and his magic. Let me watch as he learns that he is no less to anyone as a magic user. Let me watch as he has fun with his seidr!

His ship with Sylvie. I am for ship and let ship, but for me is a no, because it is the more narcisissist thing that he could have done. And he is no narcisisst.

This first half of the show could have been so much more and it feels like a missed opportunity, at this point. Hopefully the next half will focus on Loki more, since all the other characters have been introduced. It would be great if the show titled "Loki" truly has Loki as his main character in S02, otherwise, call the show "TVA", but it wouldn't have the same pulling, right Marvel? I am happy to give me my time and money, but I want you to deliver, and you haven't so far.