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goldenwilliamson · 4 months

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hard launch | leah williamson

pairing: leah williamson x reader

a/n: merry christmas!!! enjoy some christmassy awfc fluff x

summary: reader and leah film their parts in the arsenal christmas gifting video. reader receives a gift that shows everyone who's girlfriend she is.

word count: 1.3k

The Arsenal media team had set up a Christmas tree lined with presents for all the girls to open for a video. You obliged happily, excited about having a present to open before Christmas. Leah however had to be convinced.

"It's bad luck! You can't have us opening gifts before Christmas!" She said, her voice firm.

"Ease up Lee, it's just a little present from the club," you said, rubbing the space between her shoulder blades while silently laughing at your girlfriends commitment to tradition.

"My Mum can't find out about this, she'll have a fit," Leah says, eyeing the tree scornfully.

"Well she might see this video when it goes up," Frimmy says from behind the camera.

You move out of the shot now and watch through the screen of the camera as Leah steps into frame and speaks directly to the lens, "Do I look as awkward as I feel? Because I'm sorry Mum, I don't normally do this before Christmas day, I'm being forced to."

Shaking your head, you and many of the other girls watch on in anticipation as Leah unwraps her gift, and when she pulls out the electric keyboard you all exchange knowing glances. It's no secret that learning piano has been Leah's latest mission, and you more than anyone have been along for the journey. Most evenings now your night was soundtracked by Leah sitting at the piano stool, reading her sheet music and practicing.

When she was preparing for her performance with the BBC orchestra you must have heard her play that Shania Twain song about 200 times before you had to cut her off.

"You've got it Leah, I promise," you had stressed to her.

"I'm just so nervous, I need to know I can do it perfectly!" She demanded, starting to play it again.

"Nope. No. I'm sorry, but I'm cutting you off. It's time for bed," you had said. Even though you were always supportive of her endeavours, you knew she was only stressing herself out with the drive for perfection.

"Baby, please just let me practice it one more time, then bed," she pleaded like a little kid asking for five more minutes of play time.

"Fine. Once more. But I am telling you it's been perfect 98% of the times you've played," you said.

She just waved you away and played it once more all the way through, perfectly of course, and then finally conceded to your request. When you finally crawled into bed together that night you turned towards Leah, murmuring into the darkness.

"I'm starting to get worried that I'll have Shania Twain stuck in my head forever."

Leah giggled but reassured you, "I won't be playing it forever. And trust me, I'm sick of it too."

Now today she was sitting down, playing the little electric keyboard and trying to get everyone to guess what she was playing. You knew straight away it was Adele, because she had played it for you just last night, but it took everyone else a little longer to catch on.

Leah, pleased with her present moved along to allow for the next girls to go through. You stepped in, ready to unwrap your presents with Steph and Kyra, but before you got to pull off the paper one of the Arsenal media people pulled you out.

"We'll get you to open yours on your own, Y/N," they told you. You weren't really sure why, but you trusted their vision and waited for your turn.

When you were finally standing in front of the camera after Steph and Kyra, you felt your present through the wrapping and you could tell that it was a piece of clothing. As you pulled it out, you unfolded it to reveal a t-shirt. And you instantly realised why they'd got you to open it on your own. It seemed to be a fan made t-shirt that had pictures of Leah all over the front as well as LEAH WILLIAMSON printed in large pink block letters running down the side.

You bent over laughing, not even sure if you should show it off to the camera. While you and Leah were officially together, it hadn't really been confirmed publicly. The media team knew that and obviously got you on your own so they could easily leave your clip out of the video.

"Really?" You looked up at the small crew, holding the shirt up next to your face.

Leah, watching on began to laugh now, seeing what you'd been given.

"Best present of the day guys!" She exclaimed.

"So ridiculous," you said as all the girls behind the camera laughed.

"Hard launch," Kyra said, teasing you both.

"Shut up," you smiled, "This won't be going on the Instagram," you said assertively, pointing directly down the barrel of the camera.

"Why don't you put in on, Y/N," Leah suggests.

"You'd like that wouldn't you?" You narrow your eyes at your girlfriend, knowing how much of a kick she would get out of seeing you wearing the top, looking like a fan.

"Go on," Steph urges you.

Begrudgingly, you pull your training shirt up over your head, receiving playful wolf whistles from the girls before you pull your new t-shirt down over your body. When it was on you held your arms out, showing it off.

"How do I look?" You said, giving a little spin as the girls clapped for you.

Leah walked over towards you and held onto your waist, admiring herself on your shirt.

"I bet this inflates your ego," you say, seeing the cheeky sparkle in her eyes.

Leah didn't even say anything in response, she just moved to stand next to you, threw her arm around your shoulder in a very platonic manner and posed towards the camera.

"I love meeting fans," she said, smiling at her own joke.

"Ha ha," you said sardonically, rolling your eyes and nudging her away from you.

"We should get a photo of this though," Leah said, pulling her phone out of her pocket and handing it off to Steph who snapped a picture of you both. When you looked back at it Leah wore a very cocky smirk and looked as if you were posing for a photo with your favourite footballer.

Katie stood over your shoulder to peer at the photo, "Oh that's got to go in a photo dump girls."

"I don't think so," you said quickly, leaving it there. Though you did wear the top around for the rest of the day, finding it surprisingly comfortable, until you tucked it away into your bag before heading home.

You had honestly forgotten about it until Christmas Day when you were scrolling on Instagram in bed after the long day of festivities and you saw Leah had tagged you in a photo. She was right next to you sitting on her phone with a smirk on her face.

"What have you posted?" You asked, clicking onto it and swiping through the various Christmas photos until you saw your own bashful face reflected in the photo that Steph had taken of you in the shirt. The caption read, Best time of year (love my fans @Y/N.Y/L/N) x.

Katie McCabe had already liked the post and tagged you in a comment, President of the Leah Williamson fan club aren't ya? @Y/N.Y/L/N.

"Leah!" You said sharply, looking at your girlfriend in disbelief.

"What? It's a great photo," she said.

"You're fuelling the fire," you said, referencing the ongoing speculation online about your relationship.

"So what? I don't care if people know we're together, do you?" Leah said simply.

You realised that you also didn't care, in fact you would be proud for people to know, so you shook your head.

"Of course I don't," you said, reassuring her that you were okay with this.

"Good, then stop being grumpy about the photo," she said, leaning over to give you a kiss.

"It's such a bad photo! I genuinely look like a teenage fan girl," you laughed.

"That's what makes it so great," Leah says, giggling at her ability to annoy you.

You shake your head and pick up your phone again, feeling confident in your relationship with Leah, no longer caring if people know or they don't. This leads you to respond to Katie's comment with two simple words that are enough to send all the fans spiralling over the small confirmation: Hard launch?

#leah williamson #awfc #leah williamson x reader #woso community #woso x reader #arsenal women #woso #lionesses

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i-write-sometimes-maybe · 10 months

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Show Me Off- Lady Lesso x EverTeacherReader!

Synopsis: You just wanted to dance.

Warnings: Angst but I make it better, whore is used but not in a good way, nothing really too bad. But lmk if I missed any!

Word Count: 3k

A/n: I LOVE THE NICKNAME I PUT IN THIS SO PLEASE ENJOY. okay I really wanted to get something else out for you guys, and I wanted it to be smut but I don’t have the motivation for smut unfortunately 😩. But I hope you guys enjoy this one! Reblogs, likes, and comments are all welcomed!

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

You were making your finishing touches on your gown in the mirror, making sure every detail was perfect and every thread was in the right place.

You were so focused on the task at hand that you didn't even notice Lesso watching you, admiring you in the mirror. She adored you, and you looked stunning in the dress you chose.

She came up behind you, wrapping her arms around your waist, "You look ravishing tonight, darling." She planted a kiss on your neck.

You turned in her arms, it was your turn to admire her. The fitted suit she chose was one of your favorites, the all-black three-piece suit looked so good on her.

"Thank you, love. You look as exquisite as ever." You gave her a quick peck on the lips, to not ruin your lipstick or transfer it to her.

"Are you nearly ready? We don't want to be late, we are chaperones after all." Though she was a little bit excited for this ball, well, excited to go with you, she still hated the objective of being a chaperone.

"I'm ready, there's nothing else I need but you." She smiled and placed another kiss on your lips.

You wrapped your hands around her arm as you left her quarters towards the event, you could barely contain your excitement. You thought that this was finally your time to show her off, to finally say that you're with the one and only Dean of Evil.

But you had thought wrong.

You could hear the start of the orchestra as you turned down the ballroom corridor when Lesso shrugged you off her. Confusion instantly overtook you.

"What-" Your confusion increased tenfold when her steps increased in pace. "What are you doing?"

Lesso turned back with a look that said it was clearly obvious, "You know we can't be seen that closely." The way she said that so nonchalantly brought you many feelings, and none of them were good.

"But I thought," Tears begin filling your eyes, but you can't cry. You can't ruin your makeup, so you shook your head to shun them away. "I thought tonight was when we could finally come clean and be seen together in public." It came out much more questioning than you intended.

"Please, you know it's strictly forbidden for us to be close in public." She turned back around and continued on.

There's no way that this was that easy for her. That she can say that and not feel even the slightest tinge of guilt.

"Fine." Strictly forbidden, what foolishness. She acts as if she's not the one to create these rules.

Your heart felt heavy and your bottom lip quivered slightly, knowing you'd have to enter the ballroom alone. You didn't even want to be there anymore, not after that. You contemplated turning back to your quarters for a solid minute.

But you had already put so much time into your look, plus you were expected to be a chaperone.

So, after watching your love walk away from you, she didn't even wait for you to be a little bit behind her. You continued on with your soul weighing on you like stone.

You just couldn't understand it, the way her demeanor entirely flipped threw you off. You wrapped your arms around you to ease the coldness you suddenly felt.

As you entered the elegantly decorated ballroom, themed perfectly for the celebration of the summer solstice, the doing of Dovey no doubt, you couldn't help but look around.

Each of the decorations were catching your eye, especially the colorful flowers she has expertly spaced around the room. But something dark caught your eye, like it did every time.

Lesso was standing off in the corner, her soft features nowhere to be found, with a drink in hand. You desperately wanted to walk over to her and have her wrap her arms around you or pull you on the dance floor, but you couldn't.

Lesso had finally spotted you, sending you a smile that only you would ever be able to detect. Lesso became confused herself when you didn't even attempt to return the smile, your smile was one of her favorite things.

You looked away from her and continued on, your arms falling to your side as you made your way to Professor Dovey and Professor Anemone. If she was going to barricade herself in her Never space, then you're left to be in your Ever space.

Right away, Anemone could tell something was off with you. She was your greatest friend, so of course she could clearly tell that there was something wrong when your excitement was nowhere to be found, especially when you've been excited for this ball for weeks.

"Dear, what's the matter?" She placed her hand on your elbow as she guided you away from Dovey.

"Nothing," You attempted to pass off the lie while trying so hard to not glance in Lesso's direction. "Everything is alright."

"Okay, well, I know that's not true so let's try that one more time." Yeah, she knew you well.

Everything about you deflated, your smile and posture but especially your tone, "I don't really wanna talk about it, okay? So, can we drop it and focus on the kids?" Whatever was bothering you was bad enough that you didn't open up about it, so she knew it wasn't good.

"Would you like to dance? I know I'm not your 'secret girlfriend' but maybe it'll cheer you up?" It was a lie, she knew who your secret girlfriend was.

She wasn't thick, after all, and once that sentence escaped her she realized what was going on. Anemone saw how you hadn't even looked at Lesso yet so she knew that must be at least a part of the reason.

A small smile came to your face, "Sure, why not." You said as you grabbed onto her now extended hand.

The timing couldn't have been more right as a new song had just begun when you both made it to the center of the ballroom.

All the students cleared some space as they saw you two coming. You ignored the feeling of all the eyes on you as you began dancing with her, and you could tell that there wasn't one person not watching.

You focused on each of the movements and the sound of each instrument as you both gracefully moved across the room. Both of your semi-puffy dresses move elegantly with you. The breeze increased as you both twirled and spun around the ballroom floor.

As the song came to an end, another one was soon to play, and you slowed to a small shuffle. You rested your face on her shoulder, facing away from her but in a way to speak so only she could hear, "Thank you for this, Emma."

Just as you finished your sentence and before Emma even had a chance to respond, an exasperated-looking Lesso came storming towards you both.

She didn't slow but she grabbed your arm and pulled you from Anemone in a swift move, causing you to move with her.

Lesso kept moving, walking you towards the terrace, "What are you doing?!" You tried pulling your arm from her, but you didn't try hard enough.

"I don't appreciate you being all over Emma, acting like some common whore."

You instantly stopped moving once you heard her words and crossed onto the outside terrace, a scoff escaped you, one of disbelief and disrespect, and you ripped your arm back, "I beg your pardon?!"

"There's no need for you to be all over that woman when you're simply dancing with her." She crossed her arms.

She really doesn't get it, does she?

"Emma is my friend! And we were only dancing! Where'd you get the audacity-" Your sadness began to shift to anger.

She cut you off, "Oh, please! You-"

You cut her off this time, not willing to feed her delusion, "If the image of me dancing with another is so unbearable, then you gain the courage to do so instead!"

"You know we can't do that!"

"No, we can! You just don't want to! Your reputation is far more important to you than I!"

Lesso couldn't believe a statement like that came from you, sure that kind of thing would've been expected by anyone else once they heard she was in a relationship, but not you, "That is not true."

"Really? Because, I have yet to see anything that suggests otherwise," Your tears returned. "You- you. You play into my desire of finally being able to be seen with you, only for you to tear it apart and quite literally throw me aside. Just so you can keep your spotless Never appearance." The tears finally escaped, falling effortlessly down your face and effectively ruining your makeup.

"That's, not what I meant to do," Lesso hasn't realized how much she had fucked up until this moment.

A humorless scoff came from you once more, "That's all you have to say for yourself? Not even an apology? Wow." You started turning back into the ballroom.

She stopped you with a hand on your arm, "No, darling, wait!"

You stopped, but not in the way she hoped, "No! You simply can't fix this with an 'I'm sorry', okay? Figure this out on your own." You pulled your arm back again and continued onto the ballroom.

You entered again but had no intentions of staying.

Everyone kind of paused when they saw you re-enter with tears streaming down your face, a stunned Lesso standing in her spot on the Terrace. Of course, they had all witnessed her pulling you away and watched on curiously, but they hadn't expected you to return in tears. Especially Anemone and Dovey, the two being the most stunned as their eyes followed you out of the ballroom and then redirected to Lesso.

Lesso was used to having all eyes on her, but not like this. As she walked back to the corner she was previously perched in, everyone eyed her down. It only lasted a second before she made it clear that she was still the Dean of Evil, and everyone realized that now may not be a good time to piss her off.

Dovey gave her a pointed look, one that clearly says there will be a discussion about what occurred, but Lesso couldn't bring herself to care. Not when she was too preoccupied with wondering how and what you were doing.

The answer? Not good and currently staring at the wall with dried tears on your face.

You knew you shouldn't be reacting in such a way, but you also couldn't help it. The way Leo just threw you off her and walked away without as much as looking at you, how she called you a whore for dancing with your friend. The worst part was this was entirely avoidable.

You didn't want to dance with Emma, you wanted to dance with her. You didn't want to be in the middle of the room with all eyes on you, you wanted to be in the privacy of her quarters while laying in her arms.

Eventually, after who knows how long, you got tired of sulking. You brought yourself to get changed into your pajamas and wash your face from your mess of what was once makeup. You just wanted this day to be over with.

Time crept on for the both of you, you thought sleep may help and attempted it, but failed. And Lesso tried slipping out the side of the ballroom but got caught by various people.

For every toss and turn you made in your bed, was one meter closer Lesso got to the door. She was getting close to hexing the entire ballroom before she just started shoving people out of her way with her cane to leave.

Lesso had no idea how it got so out of hand. Of course, she didn't realize just how much she was hurting you by keeping the both of you a secret, though it wasn't much of a secret. Not after tonight at least.

She continued on to your quarters, she knew you'd be nowhere else. The only annoying part about that is your quarters are on the opposite end of the school than hers is, so she had a whole journey to herself. One that allowed to realize just what she's done.

By this time, you had already shoved your face into the pillow from frustration. It was undoubtedly due to many things but you liked to blame it only on your difficulty sleeping.

Just as you sat up to get a glass of water, there was a knock at your door. You didn't have to open it to know who was standing on the other side, the pattern of the sound telling you exactly who it was.

A part of you was thrilled that she came back, back to you. But the other part wanted her to stay away.

"Go away." You spoke out, not making any attempts to move in any way.

"Starlight, it's me." You nearly burst into tears at the nickname.

She thought it fit you perfectly, not only because of your love for the stars and all things space, but because your Leo always said, 'Your eyes sparkle more than the stars, my little Starlight.'

"I know it is." Your heart kept screaming at you to at least see her.

"I came to apologize. I understand you're upset with me, and you don't have to forgive me, but can I at least look at you when I do?" For the first time tonight, you heard genuine emotion from her.

You couldn't hold back anymore, your heart won out. What an Ever thing to do.

You stayed silent as you walked to your door and opened it. The once put-together Dean was now standing in front of you, hair disheveled and emotions coating her face.

Lesso was taken aback by your appearance, not that it was bad, just not what she was expecting. She thought you'd still be all dressed up, not ready for bed with a tear-stained face. She messed up big time.

"Well?" Your voice snapped her back into the situation.

"Star, I'm sorry. I really am," She snuck past you and into your quarters, and if you had any energy, you would've attempted to stop her. "You were right about me wanting to maintain my reputation, but you were wrong that it's more important than you." You silently shut your door and turned to meet her in the middle of your room.

And for a moment, neither of you spoke. Just the looks being shared. You just looked at her, feeling many things.

She placed her hand on your cheek as your lip quivered, "My beautiful Starlight," Her thumb started brushing against your cheek. "I am sorry."

Your heart screamed for you to forgive her, but your mind told you to say what you want to say. And you decided on that.

"I guess you don't get it then?" She gave you a questioning look. "The way you just toss me aside made me feel utterly useless. And then, you call me a whore and you expect me to just pass over that? I get you're sorry, and you should be, but I'm not going to forgive you just because you say that."

Oh.

You can tell by the look on her face, she finally gets it.

"My darling girl, words can't even begin to explain how sorry I am. I fucked up, I know. I want to take it back but I can't. But what I can do is, from now on no more hiding. No more sneaking or lies. I'm done with that."

Your eyes filled with hope, "You promise?"

"I promise you, darling. From this moment on, no more hiding. Just us against the world, together." She pushed some of your hair back behind your ear.

A small smile came to your face, "Thank you, and I'm sorry I reacted so strongly. I was just really looking forward to tonight."

"You have nothing to apologize for, Star. You were simply reacting. What were you looking forward to, darling? Chaperoning?" Lesso knew you liked your job, but she didn't think you liked it that much.

"No, I, I just wanted to dance with you." The way that sentence escaped your lips, so soft and broken, made Lesso's heart lurch, she couldn't believe it.

She made her beautiful and fragile flower wilt, and she knew it was all because of her.

She reached her hand out towards you, and you looked at it curiously before looking back at her, "What-"

She didn't let you finish, "Let's dance, Starlight."

"But I'm not-"

"Right here, right now, just us. No need for fancy clothes or anyone watching."

The sweet, soft, and warm smile that Lesso has come to know and love, finally came to your face. The very one she's been wanting to see all night.

You finally accepted her hand, and when you did she stepped closer to you and placed her other hand on your waist.

You followed each step she made, soft grins spread across both of your faces as you easily moved around your quarters.

"There's no music," You pointed out.

"That is true. But who said you must have music to dance?" She rhetorically asked as she pulled your arm above your head and began to spin you.

The silence that filled the space was a comfortable one. Once you came back around again, you looked between her eyes. It was plain as day, the admiration she had for you. Whether you saw it or not was entirely different.

"Thank you for this, Leo." You moved to rest your head on her shoulder, your steps never ceasing, with your face nuzzled into her neck.

"Anything for my Starlight."

This. This is all you wanted.

🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮

Taglist: @inlovewithgreta @v3nusxsky @just-your-casual-nerd @pebbleswritessometimes @bigolgay @darkth1ngs @sgelessoanddoveykissing @scream-queenlover @hxzxrdous (I think that’s all of you lovelies).

#charlize theron #lady lesso #lady leonora lesso #fanfic #sapphic #oneshot #angst with a happy ending #sge fanfiction #sge movie #sfgae #sfge #school for good and evil #leonora lesso x reader #lady lesso x reader #soft lady lesso #leonora lesso #lesso x reader #kinda reader x Emma

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helloalycia · 1 month

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𝐌𝐘 𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑'𝐒 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃 [𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄] — 𝐉𝐀𝐂𝐊𝐈𝐄 𝐓𝐀𝐘𝐋𝐎𝐑

one / two / four / masterlist / wattpad

summary: you find out the reason why Jeff cheated, you and Jackie start to spend more time together and a familiar face makes a return...

warning/s: mentions of cheating.

author's note: here’s part 3! glad you’re all enjoying this one and sorry it’s posted a bit late, i’ve been fasting so time has been a whirlwind lately lmao

After reconciling with Jackie, our relationship returned to normal, or at least as normal as it could be now that she wasn't dating my brother.

Whenever we saw each other around, she'd smile or greet me, and I her. We'd make small talk every now and then, and I accepted that this was how it would be from now on. There was no need for her to make an effort with me anymore, as sad as that was.

One day after school, I was practicing with the Music teacher and school orchestra for the school play that was happening next month. It was relatively new, but I was enjoying it. Afterwards, as I was walking to my car, I noticed the Yellowjackets leaving the field and heading in the same direction. That was where I saw Jackie, chatting with Taissa but waving at me when she saw me. By chance, we fell into step with one another.

"Hey," I said with a smile, before glancing at Taissa. "Hey, Tai, how are you?"

"Good, just tired from practice," she said, returning my smile. "You?"

"Band rehearsal," I answered, motioning to the guitar case on my back. "Tired too."

She snickered. "Nice." Then she looked to Jackie and added, "Wanna give me your bag and I'll meet you at my car?"

"Thanks, Tai," Jackie said to her, before she jogged off to the parking lot to throw their bags in. Her attention returned to me as she said, "So, band rehearsal?"

"It's for the school play," I clarified.

"You? Acting?" she teased, and I rolled my eyes playfully.

"Hilarious," I said, shooting her a look. "I'm in the orchestra."

"Ah, that makes more sense," she played along. "Though seeing you up on stage in some Shakespearean garb would've been quite the sight."

"You wish," I mumbled, making her laugh. "So, how was practice?"

She shrugged. "Not bad."

But judging by the sideways glance she gave to Shauna, who was walking to her car also, I knew things weren't great.

"Everything still weird?" I asked sympathetically.

Jackie sighed, pushing her hair behind her ear. "Yeah. How could it not be? I lost my best friend and boyfriend in one fell swoop." I frowned, unsure what to say to make her feel better, but she shook her head and tried to change the subject. "It doesn't matter anyway."

"It does," I said softly.

"It's just awkward at practice now," she admitted. "And it's not supposed to be. I'm the captain and I can't even look Shauna in the eye. I'm still upset, but what can I do? I have to get over it for the team."

If Jeff hadn't gone about this the way he did, none of this would be happening. Would he have done something different if he knew the repercussions of his actions?

"I'm sorry," I said, smiling sadly. "I wish I could help somehow."

She relaxed her shoulders and gave me a small smile. "You are."

I disagreed, but she was stubborn, so I didn't comment.

"Anyway, I'm tired from practice now, but we haven't had a proper catch up since...," she started, but paused, unsure how to mention the cheating thing. "Yeah. Do you want to come 'round to mine tomorrow?"

My eyebrows raised, not expecting her to say that. And as much as I wanted to accept, I couldn't tomorrow.

"Not to sound like a nerd, but I have homework," I said with a slight chuckle.

"Oh, I can help," she offered, before smiling cockily. "I've done it all before, remember?" I laughed at her eagerness, and her amusement was replaced with sincerity as she continued, "Just because Jeff isn't in my life now, doesn't mean you don't have to be. I'm still here for you, y'know."

Hearing her say this warmed my heart and put any doubts I had about our relationship to rest. Maybe I wasn't just Jeff's little sister after all.

"I know," I confirmed. "I'm happy to stop by tomorrow. Thanks, Jackie."

She flashed me a smile, and I tried not to get distracted by how beautiful she was. Jeff was pretty stupid, wasn't he?

—

As time went on between Jackie and I, it felt like we actually became friends and not just circumstantial acquaintances. I tried my best to be there for her, both because I wanted to be and also because it felt right after my brother was the reason for her hurt. She never visited my place because Jeff lived there and she didn't want to see him, so I'd stop by hers if we hung out outside of school.

She never spoke more on the Shauna/Jeff situation, even when I knew she hadn't properly talked to either of them since finding out. Despite it all, I knew she missed Shauna, her best friend, but it was all still fresh and I just guessed she was bottling it away for now. I wondered how long she'd last like that – maybe forever – until she finally broke.

A few weeks later, a month after they'd broken up, I was watching a Yellowjackets game with Jeff at school. As always, they'd dominated the game with a 3-0 advantage and the crowd were on the pitch celebrating in no time. My plan was to congratulate Jackie, glad she'd worked on whatever problems had been developing in practice, when I noticed Jeff had wandered off in a different direction. I didn't really pay him much attention as I scanned the pitch for Jackie.

"Jackie!" I called over the noise of the crowd when I spotted her.

She wasn't looking at me, her expression dropping as she looked right past me. I followed her gaze, realising she was staring at Jeff who was hugging Shauna. I raised my brows with surprise, not realising they'd made it official now, and then he kissed her and she let him and I didn't know what to think. It felt inappropriate considering everything, but they didn't seem to care. Maybe they'd deemed a month long enough before going public.

I looked back to Jackie, whose jaw was clenched as she glared at them, and then before I could go to her, she stormed off angrily. I cursed inwardly, glancing at Jeff and Shauna once more – they hadn't noticed, too enamoured by one another.

Following after Jackie, I ran off the pitch and saw a streak of blonde heading back into the school. Worried, I chased after her, catching sight of her running down the hall.

"Jackie, wait up!" I called after her, breathless. Geez, was I really this unfit?

She kept running, going to the locker room and slamming the door behind her. I sighed, letting myself in, and she spun around at my entry. Tears were streaming down her face and she hastily attempted to wipe them away, making my chest hurt.

"What is it?" she asked calmly, though her hands were shaking.

I frowned. "I didn't know he was... seeing her now."

Feigning indifference, she said, "What does it matter? Obviously it was going to happen. They didn't fucking cheat for nothing, right?"

"Not so soon though."

She smiled bitterly, squeezing her hand into a fist as she tried to collect herself. But the tears were welling in her eyes again, and then she suddenly punched the locker angrily.

"Fuck him!" she yelled, startling me, before hitting the locker again. "Why does he get to be happy when I'm not?! How is that fair when he did the bad thing?!"

I let her calm down, figuring she needed to get her frustration out somehow, and then she frowned to herself, lips trembling.

"It's not," I agreed. "You're right."

She hugged herself, tears rolling down her cheeks silently. "If I'd just slept with him, if I hadn't waited, maybe he'd...," she began to mumble to herself, but stopped.

I was both grossed out and furious when I heard this. I'd never known the reason for their breakups, but this wasn't what I'd expected. And now Jeff had got what he wanted whilst Jackie was left to question everything. God, if I wasn't annoyed at him before, I definitely was now.

"No," I told her, irritated, but at my idiot brother. "That's not the right way to think. What he did was horrible. Whether or not that was the reason, he shouldn't have cheated. He's a coward, Jackie, and you shouldn't be here upset thinking about what ifs."

She shook her head, voice stuck in her throat, and then looked at me with glistening eyes. It broke my heart, seeing a usually confident and sure-of-herself girl broken at the hands of some guy.

"Oh, Jackie," I said sympathetically, stepping forward to hug her.

She fell into my arms, hiding her head in my shoulder and sniffling quietly. I didn't let go, one arm around her as the other rubbed circles on her back.

"You deserved better than him anyway," I told her quietly, lips moving against her hair. "I love him, he's my brother, but it wasn't right what he did."

She didn't reply, but she didn't make a move to leave either, so we stayed like that until I led her to the bench between the lockers, still entwined. Her sniffling lessened and the wet spot on my shoulder grew cold when she finally pulled back; her hand found mine and she didn't let go.

"Thank you," her voice came out as an unintentional whisper, making her clear her throat. "Things have just been so hard. Shauna was my person, and I'm just– I'm so hurt by her actions."

"I can imagine," I said, squeezing her hand gently. After a pause, eyes taking in her red, swollen ones with concern, I asked, "D'you think you'd ever forgive her?"

She exhaled shakily. "I don't know."

I nodded, waiting for her to take a breath. She let go of my hand finally, wiping away the remaining tears on her face before growing embarrassed.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to cry on you," she apologised. "You definitely didn't sign up for this."

"It's alright," I assured her. "I'm just worried about you."

She looked down at her hands, knuckles red from punching the locker. "All that talk about me being there for you and, really, it was me who needed you."

I cracked a small smile in an attempt to lighten the mood. "Well, the extent of your support was tutoring me in French, and you're shit at that. Pas bon du tout (not good at all)."

She let out a laugh, and it was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. Making her laugh after she'd just cried, admiring the way her eyes glistened with tears but in a way that made them sparkle because of her momentary happiness... I'd never seen anything like it.

"I'm gonna pretend I understood that," she spoke with a raspy voice, before hugging me once more.

"C'mon," I encouraged, standing up and pulling her with me. "This isn't how you should be celebrating your victory. You're the team captain for crying out loud!" She smiled, and I continued, "Don't you usually go to those after parties?"

She pushed her fringe from her eyes. "I'm not really in the mood. Shauna and Jeff will probably be there...”

"Okay, how about celebrating with the girls?" I asked, not wanting to upset her so quickly.

Judging from her expression, I knew they'd be at the party too, so that was out. I pursed my lips, trying to think of a way to cheer her up, and then decided to just do it myself.

"Right, get ready and then meet me outside," I instructed.

"What?"

I was already heading to the door as I answered, "I'm taking you out. My treat."

She tilted her head, giving me a knowing look. "You don't have to do that."

I shrugged. "I want to."

She sighed deeply, smile curving on her lips gratefully.

As promised, I took Jackie out that evening, treating her to some ice cream at the fancy parlour in town and buying her whatever she liked. We talked about everything and anything, and I hoped that, for at least a moment, she could forget all about Jeff and Shauna.

—

It took a while after Jeff and Shauna had gone public with their relationship for Jackie to finally accept it and try to move on. Personally, I don't think I could have had it in me to be the bigger person, but when Jackie came to me telling me she wanted to clear the air with them, I knew she'd made up her mind.

Ultimately, it was her choice and I was happy that she finally felt like she was in a place where she could move on. Whatever she'd said to them had done wonders for her, as she no longer avoided my house anymore when she wanted to hang out, and I sometimes saw her talking to Shauna without staring daggers into the side of her head. It was progress I never thought I'd see.

Shortly after that, Shauna brought it upon herself to try and fix things with me. We'd never talked much before, but since she was Jeff's new girlfriend, she must have felt she needed to make things right. That was one awkward conversation, and I was still upset at her for how she'd handled the situation, but I knew that if Jackie could forgive her, then so could I.

So, that was how everything had settled into a new 'normal'. My friendship with Jackie had grown stronger and I was on somewhat good terms with my brother and Shauna, and I guess that was all I could need right now. Of course, that didn't change the fact that I still had a massive crush on Jackie, and anytime she'd show any interest in me, I grew flustered.

Take this one time when she was sat in the school theatre, waiting for me to finish up practice for the school play after school. It was in two weeks and we were doing final run-throughs with the music and acting together. Jackie was only here because we had plans to grab food afterwards, since she'd finished soccer practice today too.

After what felt like forever, the Drama teacher finally dismissed us all and I joined Jackie by the exit.

"That was actually pretty good," she said when she saw me, nodding to the stage where the other students were finishing up.

"It's not a bad play," I said with a shrug, before shouldering my guitar case. "You planning to get tickets?"

At this, she looked to me with a smirk. "Well, of course. Gotta support you, right?"

She was teasing me and I began to grow warm at the way she was staring at me, and then she was grinning at my reaction and I avoided her stare. Times like these were when I really wished I could get over her.

—

I was cleaning out my bedroom, per my mum's request as she wanted to do a spring clean even though it was the middle of the summer, when I heard Jeff calling me from his room.

"Coming!" I called back, before dropping what I was doing to see what he wanted.

If my room was a tip, his was much worse. But when he saw me, he had a neatly collated box of items in hand, holding it out to me.

"What's this?" I asked, accepting the box that he practically thrust in my arms. When I looked inside, I saw some girly items that definitely weren't his.

"They're Jackie's," he answered awkwardly. "It's just some stuff she left behind that I never got around to returning. I'd go, but I think it might be better if you do."

"Right," I breathed out, before nodding. "I'll sort it."

He offered me a small smile. "Thanks, Y/N."

I gave Jackie's house number a call, ending up in a polite conversation with her mother who loved to talk my ear off and, of course, ask about Jeff who she still wasn't letting go of. After I finally got to the point of my call, she encouraged me to stop by so I thanked her and made my way over to the Taylor residence, only planning to make a quick trip.

When I rang their doorbell however, nobody answered. I rang it another time and even knocked a few times, but there was nothing. And then I fell silent as I heard a faint beat playing from somewhere. Following the sound of the music, I found myself walking around to the garden, realising there was a pool party going on. The Yellowjackets were all here from what I could see, some lying on sun beds whilst others played in the pool. Music was blaring from some speakers and they all seemed to be having the time of their life in the sun.

"Y/N, hey!" I heard Jackie, and searched the space to find her in the pool.

My mouth went dry when I saw her climbing out, only in her two-piece swimwear. As she approached me with a smile, I was certain I'd forgotten how to breathe, unsure where to look because it all seemed inappropriate. Her hair was wet, water droplets rolling down her tanned skin, and I wouldn't have been surprised if I had a heart attack from how hot she looked there and then.

"My mum said you were stopping by," she said, wiping her face with the back of her hand.

I looked at her eyes and only her eyes, hoping my face wasn't as hot as the sun felt right now. "Yeah, I rang the doorbell but nobody answered."

"My bad, sorry," she said with a laugh. "I'm having a team pool party. Team building and all that. The music must have been too loud."

"It's all good," I said quickly. "Erm, I've got some of your things. You left it at ours when you were... yeah."

At the implication of Jeff, her smile faded naturally. Glancing at the box, she nodded gratefully.

"You alright to follow me?" she asked, grabbing her towel from the chair.

"Sure."

As she led the way, some of the girls said their hellos when I walked past, and then Jackie led me through her mansion of a home before settling in the kitchen.

"You can just leave it on the table over there," she said, nodding to the dining table whilst drying herself with her towel.

All I could do was nod as I went to set it down, and then she was suddenly behind me, the scent of chlorine and suncream washing over me.

"I was wondering where that necklace was," she said with amusement, looking over my shoulder and down at the necklace at the top of the box.

I shivered at how close she was, acutely aware of her minimal clothing and trying so hard not to let my eyes wander.

"You seem nervous, are you okay?" she asked, before walking to the fridge. "You want a drink?"

I swallowed hard, shaking my head. "No, sorry, I've gotta go finish cleaning the house with my mum. It's just hot out."

She smirked, clearly aware of the effect she was having on me, but I was too flustered to comment on it.

"That's too bad," she said with a pout. "You can stay if you want."

I waved a hand dismissively. "Oh, it's a team thing. I'll be okay."

She chuckled, eyeing me curiously, probably noticing the way I couldn't even meet her gaze anymore. "C'mon. I'll walk you out."

I followed her as she led me back into the garden, where the others were still having the time of their life. Jackie stopped and flashed me another picture perfect smile.

"Have fun cleaning," she said, patting my shoulder. "Maybe next time, yeah?"

I nodded, suddenly finding the space behind her head very interesting. She hugged me, making me freeze at the contact of both her body and the water on my clothes. She had to be doing this on purpose, surely.

"See you later," she said sweetly, eyelashes fluttering.

I nodded, quickly backing up, and stupidly almost slipping into the pool as I grew distracted by her yet again.

She laughed, warning, "Be careful!"

I smiled awkwardly, before taking extra care to leave without making even more of a fool of myself. Could you blame me? The last thing I needed right now was to be in close proximity of a half dressed Jackie Taylor.

—

Jackie Taylor was on everyone's radar, even when she was taken by Jeff, so I should have expected someone to make their move once enough time had passed since their breakup. Still, knowing it would happen didn't make it any easier to witness.

There was a fair in the park and the band and I had secured a gig there, playing a few sets during the evening. We played some covers and a few originals, the first we'd ever performed that I'd written. It was surreal, but everybody seemed to like it which made the smile permanent on my face the whole time.

After our first set, we all went offstage to take a quick break, and that was when Jackie found me. It was the first I'd seen her all evening, since she'd arrived with her friends and I was busy up until now.

"Y/N, you were amazing up there!" she complimented as soon as she saw me, pulling me in for a hug.

"Thanks, Jackie," I said appreciatively, returning her hug. "How long have you been here?"

"Your whole set," she said with a smile. "And would you look at that – I finally heard some original songs."

My cheeks grew warm as she shot me a teasing smile.

"I don't suppose you'll tell me who they're about?" she asked innocently, giving me her best puppy dog eyes.

"You supposed correctly," I retorted with a knowing look, making her curse quietly with defeat. I laughed and added, "Look, I appreciate your curiosity, but maybe they're just songs, d'you ever consider that?"

She eyed me suspiciously, smile ever present. "I guess... but I've got my eye on you, Y/N."

I rolled my eyes lightheartedly, hoping she couldn't hear my heart racing in my chest. Green-brown eyes met mine, sparkling with mischief, and I forced myself to endure, not wanting to raise suspicion. Hopefully she'd never find out they were all about her.

After chatting with her on my break for a little longer, I rejoined the band onstage and performed a few more songs. It was easier to spot Jackie in the crowd now that I knew where I was looking, and she looked so cute as she stood there with her friends, dancing along to the music. It was almost a dream, and then it wasn't. Because as I was performing, I noticed some guy talking to her, the flirting very obvious even from where I was stood.

I tried to stay focused, purposely avoiding looking in her direction, but I couldn't help myself. My eyes would drift back over to her, and that damn guy was still there, trying his luck as she entertained it for a bit. I knew I never had a chance with her, but seeing the girl you liked chatting to another guy was always a kick in the teeth, especially when it meant she wasn't paying you any attention anymore.

After a few more songs, the band and I called it a night and wanted to enjoy the fair together. Jackie was still being talked to by that guy, so I attempted to ignore it and focused on having a nice night out with my friends.

After playing a few carnival games and going on some rides, Jackie found me again, standing with my friends as Y/BF/N bought some ice cream for herself.

"Hey, guys, nice performance tonight," Jackie complimented the others, who chorused their gratitude. She added, "You mind if I steal Y/N away for a bit?"

"Oh, no, go for it!" Tommy insisted with a grin, tugging the others away before I could protest.

I sighed as Jackie flashed me an enthusiastic smile. "I've been dying to go on the bumper cars. Wanna come?"

"I, er, I'm not really in the mood," I said, possibly being a little petty but I couldn't help it, I was just sad.

"Oh, c'mon, it'll be fun!" she exclaimed, shaking my arm. "You're not seriously gonna leave me hanging, are you?"

I chewed on my lip as she watched me hopefully, and it only made me realise how stupid I was being. She couldn't help it if a guy wanted to hang out with her, and I definitely had no right to be jealous. I'd watched her be my brother's girlfriend all these years, surely I could live with the fact that she'd inevitably get another boyfriend and I'd never have a chance with her.

Before I could give in and agree, the guy from earlier approached us again, checking Jackie out in a not so subtle way.

"Hey, Jackie," he said with a smile, and I resisted the urge to roll my eyes, jealousy returning in an instant. "You wanna go on the ferris wheel with me?"

I crossed my arms and looked away momentarily, anticipating the part where she'd say yes and this would all be for nothing.

"I appreciate you asking, Matt, but no thanks," she said politely.

"Oh," he said with surprise, and then grew awkward, probably not expecting her to decline. "Okay."

He left soon enough, embarrassed, and I glanced at Jackie with suspicion.

"Why not?"

She looked back to me, quirking a brow. "Huh?"

I motioned in his direction. "Why didn't you wanna go with him? He was flirting with you earlier, wasn't he?"

She suppressed a smile, eyes meeting mine with amusement. "Because I'm trying to hang out with you, idiot, if you'd only say yes."

My gaze flickered to the ground sheepishly as she let out a quiet chuckle.

"Bumper cars," I confirmed. "Sure."

Her smile widened. "Awesome. C'mon."

I let her drag me to the bumper cars, lightening up as we spent some time together. The longer the evening went on, the less this 'Matt' guy was gnawing at me, because Jackie chose me and that was something, right? We went on rides, played some stupid fair games at her insistence, despite them definitely being rigged, and she forced me to win her a prize even when I lost several times. But all in all, she was happy, and so was I, and I suppose that was all that mattered in the moment.

—

The first night of the school play was finally upon us and I was backstage getting ready when Jackie paid me a visit, surprising me with a bouquet of flowers.

"These are for me?" I asked with genuine surprise.

"What is it they say in showbiz? Break a leg?" she asked rhetorically, before laughing at her own joke.

I smiled to myself as I looked down at the flowers in my hand. "Jackie, they're beautiful. Nobody's ever got me flowers before."

She tilted her, confused. "Well, that's not right."

I chuckled, gaze falling to her. "Thank you."

Heart warming in my chest, I pulled her into a hug with my free hand, grateful for her support.

"You deserve it," she said simply, before squeezing me tight then letting go. "I should go find my seat. I'll be right at the front where you can see me."

I laughed. "I'll keep an eye out. Thanks, Jackie."

She flashed me a smile before leaving to find her seat, and I couldn't stop smiling as the Drama teacher briefed us once more before final call.

The show went on with few hiccups, probably the best run we'd ever done, and the audience seemed to love it, giving us a huge round of applause. When the orchestra got their own special shout-out, I caught sight of my family in the middle, applauding, and then Jackie, who was cheering me on so loudly at the front that I couldn't help but flush with embarrassment.

Once the curtains closed, the orchestra had to go backstage for another word with the teachers before we were finally alright to leave. I found my family waiting for me at the back of the theatre and walked by the other students receiving praise from their families.

"There she is!" Jeff exclaimed when he saw me, grabbing my shoulder and squeezing it supportively.

I smiled as my parents pulled me in for a hug and congratulated me on the show.

"Thanks, guys, thanks for coming," I said gratefully, looking between them all. "You really didn't have to. I wasn't even in the show."

"Nonsense," my mum said with a wave of her hand. "You played beautifully, sweetie."

I breathed out deeply, both embarrassed and appreciative of their support. And then Jeff's expression dropped and I realised Jackie was approaching, flashing my parents a smile.

"Jackie, how lovely to see you," my mum greeted her. "You're here for Y/N too?"

"Yes, she did great, didn't she?" Jackie asked, putting an arm around my shoulder playfully.

"She did," my dad replied with a proud smile, before raising the flowers Jackie got me in the air. "And thanks for the flowers. It was kind of you to get them for her."

"Anytime," Jackie said with a shrug, before looking to me. "Are you free now or d'you have plans?"

Before I could respond, my mum insisted I celebrate with Jackie, trusting her. Since her breakup with Jeff, Jackie was still a favourite of my parents, understandably so. After saying our goodbyes, I was left with Jackie, who seemed excited about something.

"What are you thinking?" I asked her with amusement.

"I wanna hang out, my treat," she said nonchalantly.

My smile grew. "Seriously?"

She linked arms with me and began leading me to the door. "Seriously."

And that was how we ended up at the arcade that evening, with Jackie keeping to her word and rinsing all her pocket money on the arcade machines that were definitely a waste but she didn't seem to mind. We played air hockey, skeeball, a zombie shooter game and a bunch of other stuff that I didn't think she liked, and it was awesome.

After spending over an hour messing around, she generously bought me dinner there, some burgers and fries, and I was certain I was dreaming.

"You have your own ketchup, y'know," I said with raised brows when she dipped her fries into mine.

"I ate it and there's none left in the bottle," she claimed, before going in for another dip.

"Then ask for another bottle!" I exclaimed between a laugh, pulling my tray away.

"Quit being selfish!" she retorted with a grin, before leaning over the table to land a swipe.

"Jackie!" I scolded, and she winked as she ate her fry.

I rolled my eyes at her petulance before recognising someone behind her, approaching our direction. After a double take, I realised it was Eve Perkins, captain of the Lions soccer team and the girl Jackie utterly despised. The memory of the party from last year came to mind, including the whole argument I had with Jackie afterwards, and I suddenly prayed Eve wasn't here to cause trouble.

"Okay, don't freak out, but Eve Perkins is heading this way," I said calmly.

Jackie was surprised, straightening up in her seat and dying to turn around, but she kept her cool. "I won't."

"So, let me get this straight," Eve said as soon as she stopped by our table, looking down at Jackie with irritation. "You freak out at me for hanging with a sophomore, only to hang out with her yourself? What? Was her brother not enough?"

I almost choked on my drink at the abruptness of her words, worrying when I saw Jackie beginning to clench her jaw and fix Eve with a glare.

"Firstly, that's none of your business," she said lowly. "And secondly, you bitch."

I sighed inwardly, already expecting an argument, and Eve laughed bitterly.

"Tell me, Jackie. You still worried we're gonna beat you next week?" she asked condescendingly.

"Not worried at all," Jackie said through gritted teeth, reaching for her drink to calm down.

Eve smirked with satisfaction before looking to me. "Y'know, it's a shame you're hanging out with her still. You were cute. And you definitely deserve to be more than Jackie's sloppy seconds."

Mean girl fighting was never my thing, and I was stunned into silence at how rude Eve was being, clearly because of some unresolved business with Jackie. I was also a little embarrassed at what she was implying was between Jackie and I, unsure how to respond.

"Fuck you," Jackie said instantly, not at a loss for words, and it made me realise just how quickly things had taken a turn for the worst.

"Okay, how about we just leave it?" I said, looking between them both before settling on Eve with pleading eyes. "Please?"

Eve seemed to give in, rolling her eyes before walking off to rejoin her friends by the arcade machines. I sighed with relief before returning my attention to a distracted Jackie.

"Are you okay?" I asked with concern.

She breathed out slowly. "Yes. Sorry."

"It's okay. I'm just surprised Eve reacted like that. It came out of nowhere."

"I'm not," Jackie mumbled under her breath, only confirming my suspicion of some unfinished business between her and Eve.

I chewed on my lip, still a little concerned, but then she met my eyes with apologetic ones, expression softening.

"I'm sorry she said all that," she said sincerely, though her cheeks were tinged pink. "You're not my... it's not like..." She was struggling, eyes flittering around uncharacteristically, before she finished, "You're more than my sloppy seconds."

Realising why she was awkward, I began to chuckle. "Jackie, I know. I don't believe what she said. And besides, no sloppy seconds would be treated as wonderfully as I have tonight."

She hid a smile as she nodded. "Right."

It was easy for things to return back to how they were after that little interruption, and Jackie and I finished the rest of our meals in peace. Once we were done, I grabbed our trays to throw in the bin and she waited for me by the door. As I was dusting my hands off, I felt a presence beside me and looked up, not expecting to see Eve yet again. I hoped she wasn't here to start another argument, especially because I knew I'd lose it.

"I meant it when I said you deserve better than Jackie Taylor, you know that, right?" she said with a quirked brow.

I frowned. "That wasn't very nice. Jackie's a good person."

Eve snorted in disagreement. "Sure she is."

I shifted my weight between my feet awkwardly., "Look, your feud is your feud. I'm not gonna get involved."

She shrugged. "Fair enough. Sorry for involving you."

I nodded appreciatively, and she gave me a small smile.

"See you around, cutie."

Again, I was speechless as she walked away, wondering if she was trying to mess with my head to somehow get back at Jackie. Either way, there wasn't reason for me to see her around since we went to different schools, so I didn't let it worry me too much. Instead, I returned to Jackie who was glaring at Eve from across the room.

"What did she want now?" she asked with annoyance.

Not wanting to give her more reason to be frustrated, I said, "She just wanted to apologise."

Jackie glanced at me, unconvinced, but I shrugged and held open the door for her.

"Let's get you home, Jackie."

Thankfully, she didn't question me.

#jackie taylor x you #jackie taylor imagine #jackie taylor x reader #jackie taylor #yellowjackets imagine #yellowjackets #ella purnell

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scalingsvt8thusiast · 1 month

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Skin-deep Chapter 2

summary: The one where you fall for Seungcheol amongst all the protests and insecurities. The one where you don't know that he's fallen for you too.

a/n: I'm still reeling over the fact that people actually liked chapter 1. So originally this was supposed to be part of chapter 1, but I stupidly didn't add it in cause i was worried it would be too long. But anyway, when it's finished i will create a list so its not too confusing :D

The walk to uni wasn’t so bad. The weather was good, birds were out chirping, students chatting happily around you. You felt good after yesterday’s party. Nothing better than watching all your friends get pissed drunk while you were perfectly sober.

You knew Mingyu wouldn’t make it to class this morning, his parents were visiting next week and he needed to make sure everything that was damaged was replaced and the things that were un-replaceable was fixed. That meant no morning coffee for you since Mingyu normally bought the two of you coffee. While in different courses, the both of you had arranged your classes so that you would have time to meet up in the morning before going into your individual classes.

Naturally, this lead to many rumours.

Mingyu was popular because of all his parties and money. It was no secret that Mingyu’s family owned a global hotel chain (which name rhymes with Lariott). He grew up being spoilt by his parents. Them buying him a house when he moved to uni was a good example. On a sensible 5000 square meters, they had built him an olympic sized swimming pool, the largest trampoline you had ever seen, a basketball court and a 10 bedroom mansion. The house was built by some renowned architect and was featured in architectural digest for being a masterpiece. Or that was what you heard.

It wasn’t just Mingyu who was rich, in fact his entire friend group had more money than the Kardashian’s combined. You regularly hung out with Soonyoung whose family owned some phone company in Korea which were the biggest rivals of the phone company with the fruit. Jeonghan and Joshua studied with you in the library. Jeonghan’s parents were some billionaires from Asia, you had no idea what they did, and Joshua’s parents owned some music companies in the US. Which ones? You had no clue. You, Seungkwan and Seokmin attended orchestra together, you were part of the strings section and them in the choir. Seungkwan’s father owned a few of the best law firms globally. Seokmin’s parents were in the rubber business, or something like that.

People around campus labelled you as the charity case, the girl that Mingyu and his friends took in because they had extra money to spend. Some people called you a gold digger. Some people said you were fucking them for money. The list was endless and you were friendless. Girls didn’t approach you because they all had the hots for Mingyu and Co. Several guys had tried to pay you to sleep with them, after declining with colourful language, you swore

Did it hurt your self-esteem? Not really, you never really cared for rumours. Sure, Mingyu paid for your coffee every morning, did you try to stop him? Yes, every morning. Does he listen? No.

Then there was Seungcheol, his family started a tech company that had started growing meteorically when his father became the CEO. Apparently everybody in the world knew his family. He would show up at school with a different car everyday, girls would crowd around him in the hallways (which you found comical) and all the professors in the school sucked up to him thanks to his family’s generous donations.

Seungcheol’s interest in you was a recent development, he made it his mission to flirt with you every time he was in the same vicinity as you. It was fun but you had to constantly remind yourself that you weren’t special, he treated you the same way he treated other girls.

You weren’t immune to his advances, however. When he smiled at you, you could literally feel your legs turn into jello. When he spoke to you, you felt yourself wanting to continue the conversation just to hear what he had to say with that deep voice of his. It didn’t help that you shared common interests, he was a regular sting instrument player due to his upbringing, he had a penchant for reading journal articles as well as discovering new coffee places each week. Your texting history with Seungcheol’s rivaled that of yours and Mingyu’s and you've known Mingyu since you two were in diapers.

Everyday you felt yourself getting closer to becoming one of Seungcheol’s hair twirling, pitchy, squeaky zombies.

When you arrived for class, you sat alone at the corner. Coffee-less. None of your friends took your course, so you spent every class alone. You had tried to make friends at first, but they all ended up asking you to introduce them to Mingyu and Co. When you rejected to help, they would just flat out stop speaking to you. After the first few “friends”, you gave up.

The professor started droning on about paediatric respiratory conditions and all you could think about is how much you wanted this to end. Throughout the lecture you received dirty looks from some whispering girls as usual. You recognised some of them from the night before, Seungcheol’s squeaky zombies.

When the professor finally ended his speech (essentially talking to himself the entire time), you packed your bag and bolted out of the room, not wanting to deal with any of those girls. You were surprised to see Seungcheol just by the door. He was leaning against the wall, looking as cool as the devil himself. When he spotted you, he pushed himself off the wall and approached you with a coffee cup in hand.

“Cheol? What are you doing here?” You said to him while adjusting your laptop bag.

“You look in need of coffee, doll,” He smiled, holding out the coffee cup. Just as you were about to reach for it, he pulled back. You furrowed your eyebrows, staring at him.

“Let’s trade,” He said holding an empty hand out, “Your bag for coffee.”

“What?”

“Your bag first.”

“I-what?”

“Jesus, princess, you really need coffee,” he pulled your bag off your shoulder with his free hand and pushed the coffee cup into your open palm. You sigh, not wanting to argue with him.

“Cheol, why are you here?” You ask in between sips, allowing yourself to soak up the sweet sweet embrace of coffee. “Thank you by the way.”

“Why not?” He said as his eyes traced your lips, memorising every shape and turn. His heart fluttered from how cute you looked doing the most mundane things like coffee drinking.

“Cheol.”

“Mingyu told me he wasn’t coming in today so he asked one of us to get you coffee, I came because I wanted to see you. Happy?” He said, looking away at the last bit. “Now come on babe, let’s go.”

“Go where?”

“Do you enjoy questioning me, sweetheart?”

“Yes.” You smiled at him mischievously, he grinned back at you.

He slung your bag over his shoulder. As the two of you walked, you dart around to try and grab your bag back from him. Amused by your efforts, he resorted to putting an arm around your shoulder, holding your arms down as he lead you to his car.

The car in question was a black Ferarri Daytona SP3, you only know because people had been talking about it nonstop, that and your brother was a car person. The obvious choice and most sensible option for a uni student. A Ferarri.

Many students were surrounding the car and snapping pictures, you knew with the way you two were walking you’d probably make the headlines of many group chats along with his car. As the two of you approached, the crowd seemed to part to allow Seungcheol to reach his car.

“Ok, but seriously where are we going,” You said, squatting down to search for the door handle. How on earth do these doors open?

“Mingyu asked us to go over for food.” Seungcheol said, he softly brush your hand away and pulled the door open for you. The door swung upwards narrowly missing your head.

You got into the car, carefully, not wanting to scratch the car and pay your entire school fees worth of damages, and as gracefully as possible. Seungcheol smiled fondly, watching you struggle to get into a car so low, he made a mental note to drive you in a higher car next time.

“How was the party last night?” You said once Seungcheol started driving.

“It was great, no thanks to you.” He said. He maneuvered through the crowd of students gathered around to admire his car.

Deciding to tease him a little bit more, you raised the pitch of your voice, “But Cheollie~ you had so many girls after you last night.”

“You left me to die,” He turned to give you a pout, “I saved you earlier but you threw me to the wolves.”

Placing a hand over his chest, “You hurt me, baby,” he declared.

You giggled, finding him cute. When Seungcheol pulled out in Mingyu’s driveway, you noticed that everybody was already there from to the variety of supercars littering the front of the house.

“Did you end up going home with any of them?” You asked trying to ignore the pang in your heart, you were only half joking right now.

The air shifted. Seungcheol’s expression unreadable, his eyebrows furrowed. “No, why would I?”

“Oh, cause if you did, you would have’ta thank me you know, I was technically your wingwoman.” You joked.

He sighed, turning off the engine. You turned to open the car door but he reached over and pulled you towards him. You looked at him, his fingers laced with yours.

“Why would I want any of them when I have you?”

You tried your best not to take that to heart.

A/N2: Again, i welcome constructive criticisms, or any questions at all, just shoot me a dm or ask or whatever :)

#seungcheol x reader #scoups x reader #seungcheol fic #scoups fic #seungcheol fluff #seventeen seungcheol #choi seungcheol #svt fanfic #svt fic #svt x reader #svt fluff #seventeen #scoups #scoups fluff #seventeen x reader #seventeen x y/n #svt

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overnowsfcb · 5 months

Text

worth it for once; pedri

summary: sometimes the show must not go on. what happens when the curtains fall?

warnings: angst, smut (dom!pedri, pool sex, hickey, blow job (v), masturbation and self-masturbation (p), pet names) mature language, abuse of alcohol, toxic relationship dynamics, emotional distress. if any of these topics makes you uncomfortable, i advise against reading this story.

word count: 5.9k

note: hi! first of all i wanted to thank everyone who interacted with 'halfway out the door', you don't even know how much it means to me that people can read my stories. i knew i said i would do some fluff, but i feel like im not good at it. i cant seem to let the reader be happy can i? (this fic is so long i feel like i got a bit carried away)

p.s.: this is my first time ever writing smut, im sorry if its too bad. also! 'halfway out the door' has ninety percent of possibility to have a second part.

p.s. 2: the party ended an hour ago and he still there. another thing that i wanted to say is that FOR ME 'slut!' is not a love song so that is my reason for this, i take my interpretation of the song and write it down — venus 🫂💐🫧

The sun's rays slipped through the white curtain covering the partially open window, letting in the morning breeze. You nestled in the sheets, still drowsy, but as you did, you snapped wide awake, realizing once again that Pedri wasn't by your side.

You turned over, hoping it was a dream, but the only remnants of him in the room were his lingering scent and memories of the night before, replaying in your mind.

The way he touched you, tracing each of the invisible scars left by your previous lovers who sought only their own pleasure, using you to their liking without paying attention to your desires.

He was different. His kisses felt like a religious experience, filling you with an ever-growing sense of fulfillment. Nothing wrapped around you more securely than the feeling of having him inside of you, merging under the lustful gaze of the moon that welcomed you on a tailor-made altar, adorned with soft sheets and sensations that turned into a celestial orchestra.

And although the next day, perhaps his flaws became evident, your infatuation took you beyond, closing the curtain of the stage within your mind; you didn't have to be displeased or critical when admiring a work of art, right?

When the strength left from the previous night was regained under pressure, and your mind returned to the frosty present, you sat up in bed, feeling your head heavy, needing to blink several times to clear the blurriness that clouded your eyes due to sleep.

Your feet rested on the wooden floor. You didn’t want to face another day with the pain of the mandatory conviction your heart held towards your mind, aiming it with a gun if it tried to move from there.

You sighed with closed eyes and gathered your clothes scattered around the room. When you finished dressing, you approached the window and inhaled a breath of air to refresh your thoughts.

You left your room; the squeak of the door echoed through the house, signaling to Elena that you had already woken up. You couldn't lie; you were afraid to face her.

She, your best friend since you desperately looked for someone to share an apartment with after the owners of your previous apartment unjustly left you out in the cold.

She, who warmly welcomed you full of empathy and commiseration, helped you deal with the storm by receiving you in a studio apartment with an air mattress. She became the person you adored most in the whole world and never lacked frankness in her words.

Both of you moved forward together; now, you succeeded in modeling, and you could search for something much more comfortable living now in a pent-house, but always side by side.

You arrived at the spacious kitchen connected to the dining room and were met with an exquisite aroma, akin to the dishes she professionally prepared. You tied your hair in a ponytail and moved the chair to sit facing the counter.

Crossed fingers and your chin resting on your hands, you noticed she expected your presence when she twisted her torso, leaving a plate with toast and homemade raspberry jam on the marble counter in front of you.

You waited a moment to grab one of the perfectly made toasts and spread the jam in the toast; you felt the tension in the air. You knew of her disapproving stance regarding your situation with Pedri, and you knew she was preparing the usual sermon.

"Want to say something about it?" It was as if she had read your mind; turning her back, you sat up straighter on the stool, your distressed chest making your heart pump more blood than usual.

"No," you replied dryly, as you took a bite of toast.

"Alright, then it'll be up to me." You felt fear travel up your spine to the buzzing in your head and a high-pitched tone ringing in your ears.

You tried to breathe normally, but it was impossible. Her actions guided your eyes; she put the angel food cake in the oven and turned around, sitting on the stool in front of you, looking at you incredulously.

"He left at seven in the morning. When was the last time he stayed the following morning with you? I know you don't want to hear this, and I understand that you're into him. But don't let that blind you from what's really happening here. You're too intelligent for this, too good for someone who treats you like an option." Her words were always harsh, and she never hesitated to tell you the bleak truth without flinching. But it wasn't what you needed now, and her words were insignificant in front of the formidable figure that Pedri occupied in your mind.

There were very few people who dared to challenge your perspective, and Elena was brave enough to do it, even though her attempts always ended in defeats.

And defeats consisted in your denial, where you decided to take off your glasses after seeing what was there. You knew it existed and acknowledged it deep down, but hearing someone throw out statements so lightly without knowing him in the homely intimacy where he could unfold without prejudices, was something only you could discover.

The 'Open Sesame' didn't work with all tones, and not everyone acquired the privilege of opening such a treasure. So, you assumed it was envy.

"Maybe it’s a mess, maybe it’s complicated, but that doesn’t mean it’s not worth a damn!" Your voice began to rise in volume the more anger you vented at her, who was innocent of it all. You noticed her furrowed brow, her attempts to help, every time she threw you a lifeline, you chose to ignore it, believing you could swim the remaining yards to shore alone.

You took a deep breath and closed your eyes, trying to find a balance, but your aggressiveness seemed to have reached its peak.

"I’ll sort it out myself, alright?" You exhaled, continuing your defense. "So just back off, Ele. I’m sick of needing your approval for everything. I’ll make my choices, even if they’re not in your rulebook." You spoke with a passive-aggressive tone. "You think you know him? You have no clue, none whatsoever." You got up from your seat, giving the countertop a light tap, and shook your head indignantly.

"I just want what's best for you, y/n," She whispered, looking you in the eyes with honesty. You headed towards the door disappearing from her sight.

You knew that she wanted to protect you like she did from the very first moment.

Despite being your age, she showed herself to be more mature than you. You were like her baby chick, and she had the instinct to keep you under her wings, but she had to admit that you had to learn defense by yourself.

And sometimes you need to fail to build your path.

There was no better remedy in your routine than drowning yourself in work to stop thinking about all the dilemmas surrounding your life. At least for a few hours.

Growing within the fashion industry was difficult without contacts; if you wanted to achieve something, you had to consider the hurdles you might carry in your backpack. But your resilience and pride prevented anyone else, terrified of having a future of subordination, from winning.

Today's meetings were about agreements for your brand, a dream that grew with you from your mom reading you bedtime stories to the present day.

You had put so much effort and creativity into your project that, regardless of what happened externally, your priority would always be there. No affair or argument could steer you away from that.

All your distractions due to logical thoughts vanished upon arriving at your apartment. You turned on the lights; Elena had left you a message informing you that she would stay at her boyfriend's house for the night.

Your home felt empty without her blasting music through the speakers and constant movements around the house. You cracked your neck, leaving your faux leather coat on the entryway rack. You lazily tossed your bag onto the couch, sitting beside it. You unbuckled your heels, freeing your feet.

A contained sigh escaped your nostrils, easing your chest a bit. You heard thousands of notifications coming from your bag. Worried, you unzipped it and searched for the phone, unsure of what was happening.

You glanced at the news headlines and the numerous social media posts where you were being tagged. You thought you had successfully escaped last time. The carefully revised alibi by both managers to divert media attention from your relationship had been futile.

But it seemed not entirely effective; without any evidence or concrete proof, just a blurry and deficient photo was enough for them to create a compelling scene for the public.

You clicked on a specific article; its name caught your attention, "The New Target of Love: The Boy in Her Chaos - Will He Survive?" You knew it wasn't the smartest decision you could make; the echoes of the voices of the people closest to you resonated in your ears. But you were alone and had nothing better to do at that moment.

The devil on your right shoulder encouraged and forced you to keep reading; with each sentence and word, your tear ducts were ready to expel the salty drops from your eyes.

You couldn't understand why journalists consistently targeted your romantic relationships instead of focusing on your professional endeavors, where you worked, and strived every day to show the world that you were more than just a pretty face. But in a sexist world, you had to accept without a murmur the things they wrote without any pity, driven by money and interactions.

Had you signed up for this life, or was it something gradually inserted into your brain about what it had to be?

You found yourself seated at your computer with a bottle of wine by your side, seemingly engrossed in reading each of the articles criticizing you and perpetuating a negative reputation of yourself.

You had poured a small amount of the burgundy liquid into your glass. Some sort of masochism consumed you, and without noticing, you began to pour more and more wine into the glass, your heart filling with misery, pausing at every clever word that defined your identity on the internet. Because all of the words seemed monotone.

Until the glass was no longer enough to swallow the bitter pill, you stared at the bottle, contemplating your next move. You shrugged and reached for the bottle with difficulty, your vision truly distorted, no longer having a sense of space.

You leaned back in the couch and took a long swig that burned your throat, feeling your heart rate rise.

You decided you had gone too far, abruptly leaving the computer on the table in front of you. When you tried to get up, you fell backward by inertia, unbalanced. That's when you realized you weren't even paying attention to the news but mindlessly scrolling your mouse.

The tears you had been holding back for over an hour and a half streamed down your cheeks immediately. Now, you couldn't turn back and felt trapped within your own uncontrollable body.

Gut-wrenching sobs made your body tremble, and at that moment, all you could think of was his touch, how every time you cried, he carefully wiped your cheeks and assured you that this too shall pass.

With tears and alcohol blurring your vision, it wasn't hard to find his number as you had it pinned in your messaging app. You opened his chat and immediately tapped the call icon.

You placed your phone to your ear, hearing the beeps from the other end, while your body, consumed by sorrow, couldn't help but continue shedding tears.

You perceived a noticeable change from silence to a clear indication that the call had been answered. You tried to stifle your crying by biting your lip, but it seemed this battle wouldn't let you emerge victorious.

"Love, are you crying?" You wanted to respond, but his voice only intensified your desire to cry; you longed to feel his warmth. You still didn't understand why you decided to go this far. "y/n, I'm worried. Did something happen? Did someone hurt you?" You tried to take a deep breath to provide an answer.

You wiped your tears with the back of your hand and then placed it on your chest, trying to assist in the calming process. "It's so exhausting." These were the words that came out of your mouth as you exhaled.

He still didn't understand exactly what you were talking about, but you kept talking. "I think I can't be with you anymore." Your voice came out strained; you truly didn't want to say those words. You clung to the arm of the chair with one hand, squeezing it, waiting to hear the response on the other side.

"What?" He couldn't comprehend how he had woken up at two in the morning, and you were talking about cutting ties. "Love, listen to me. Why don't you go to sleep, and tomorrow, we spend the day at the country house?" On the other end of the line, he easily realized the moment he picked up that you were drunk.

"Okay." You affirmed with a nod, resting your head on the armrest, and lifting your feet to stretch out on the sofa. "I love you a lot." Your face contracted again, a sign that tears would return.

"You too." He replied, and you were the one who ended the call, slightly calmer about the reflections the articles had left and the incoherent thoughts that had arisen from them.

You left the phone by your side and curled up, hugging yourself, seeking warmth without the help of a blanket. You closed your eyes, praying that the world would change radically tomorrow, although you knew it was an unlikely hope. You never wished more than for whoever was in the sky to give you a new chance to love in the right way.

You needed to believe in someone; you needed assistance from the universe to not lose the hope that once brought you immense joy. But perhaps genuine love was like Santa Claus, and sooner or later, it would crumble like any other ingenious belief.

And like a shrewd child who receives his Christmas gifts with the same enthusiasm even after learning the hidden truth, you dipped your feet into the transparent chlorinated water.

He watched each of your movements attentively, leaning on one of the pool edges. You plunged, soaking your entire body, and swam towards his direction, resurfacing enveloped in laughter with him.

He embraced you, sharing some of his warmth to your cold body due to the sudden change in the water, and you placed your hands around his waist, looking up at him from his chest.

"I love you so much." You bit your lip, seeking an outlet for your love. He rested his hands on your cheeks and began planting short kisses that spread across your entire face.

"I love you more." He reciprocated, giving two gentle taps on your legs. You jumped, and he took you into his arms grabbing your ass.

Quickly, he changed his position, leaving your back resting on the cold pool wall. The chills went up through your spinal cord, fusing the temperature of the edge and its expression, which never went out of style to make you think that everything you needed was there, with him.

You ran his sculpted shoulders with your palms open, feeling his muscles and intertwined your fingers behind his neck, brushing his hair.

Your lips brushed, and you could feel the electricity that could arise from a simple and minimal contact.

He brought his face to you, holding you tight against the concrete.

It was undeniable the indissoluble bond tied by the threads that led you each time to the same situation, and the core of your life was nourished by its bond.

As your lips collided with fervor, eager to quell the fervent passion, you pulled him closer with your legs still entwined around his waist. Feeling his hardness against your core ignited arousal as he pressed himself firmly, and both of you gasped in the midst of the kiss at the electrifying contact.

Your lips didn't want to part, too hungry for each other's sweet taste. You caught his lower lip between your teeth, pulling it gently to invite your tongue into his mouth. It had become sloppy as you lightly tugged his hair, eliciting a groan.

His hand stealthily ascended, never parting from your lips, traveling from your ass to the back of your neck, sending shivers down your spine.

His tender lips traced a pattern from your cheeks to your neck. You tilted your head back, offering more of your skin for his exploration.

Expertly, his fingers unraveled the straps of your bikini with a single pull, still nestled in your neck. As the air grazed your tightened nipples, your breath hitched when he took one between his fingers, fidgeting and further intensifying the sensation.

Your sensitive boobs elicited desperate whimpers as he continued grinding against you, creating a symphony of pleasure. The air thickened, and your bodies radiated heat.

His lips passionately suctioned a spot, causing your eyes to roll. You were well aware that he would leave a hickey there.

Moving from your neck, his lips trailed down to your collarbone. Frustration built as he skillfully teased the sides of your breasts, deliberately avoiding the attention where you craved it most.

"Pedri, please..." You gently tugged his strands, prompting him to lift his head. Counterfeit innocence gleamed in his pupils.

"What do you need, amor? Tell me, is there something I can do for you?" His gentle caress graced your cheek, and you melted into his simmering touch.

"Please..." He ceased grinding, his hand swiftly traversing to your neck, as your hand descended, grazing his abs.

"If only you could see this beautiful hickey right now," He whispered, tracing the mark and toying with you, his actions inviting your response as he often did.

It was exasperating; no matter how frequently you found yourself in such moments with him, articulating your desires remained a challenge.

"Just do something," you uttered, a touch of despondency in your voice, pouting with pleading eyes. Yet, he remained resolute.

"I just don't know what you want." He shook his head, gently placing a strand of hair behind your ear, mimicking your pout with a teasing tone.

"Alright... just please, babe, suck my tits," you replied with a hint of frustration. His corners lifted, forming a smile, having successfully achieved his goal.

"There she is, that's my good girl, aren't you?" You couldn't help but nod several times steadfastily, just wanting him to stop playing.

His face vanished from your sight as he covered one of your breasts with his mouth. A loud moan escaped your throat, a sound of satisfaction for him as he moved his tongue, savoring your skin. "Was it that difficult?" He gazed at you once more, and you sighed in irritation, prompting him to raise his eyebrows, questioning your actions.

"No." Your fingers traced his chest as he continued sucking with determination.

Moving lower, you reached the edge of the swim trunks' fabric. However, as you did, he pulled away with a frown. "Who said you could touch?" You mirrored his expression confused.

"Last night, you scared me a lot. Do you think it was funny for me? No, so you can't decide who's having fun, okay?" Your chest felt heavy, yet you found a strange allure in his dominant low voice, even though you wanted to object.

"I thought..." He wrapped his hand around your neck, pulling you back and shutting your mouth with his thumb. He watched as you sucked it, humming and biting his plump lips.

"You didn't think shit. Now, jump." He firmly gripped your hips, lifting you effortlessly to the pool's edge. Seated, you patiently awaited his guidance, uncertainty accelerating your heartbeat.

Intense eye contact heightened the tension. His fingers delicately traced over your thighs, starting from the outer part, then gently grazing your clothed intimacy. He devoured you with his gaze.

"Lean back for me, baby." You did as he pleased leaning in your elbows.

He tapped on your thighs, a signal to lift your hips, and he removed the sole fabric covering your body and throwing it to your side. He took your legs and placing them over his shoulders. Spreading you open. A groan escaped him at the sight, reveling in your arousal.

"So wet, just for me," he murmured, running his fingers through your folds, collecting your juices and parting your lips to spread the liquids.

You pressed closer, yearning for more. "Just for you." Suddenly, a firm spank on your sensitive area made you shudder, and you gasped. "Behave," he commanded, throwing you a dominant look.

Circling your clit, he gradually increased the pace. Tilted back, moans escaped uncontrollably. Another spank followed, and you met his gaze. "Keep your eyes on me, princess. Watch as I pleasure you like no one else could."

His words wielded a powerful influence in every scenario. Returning to your pussy, he made his way to slip two fingers inside you easily as you were soaked by now. The reflex to close your eyes surfaced, but his commanding words echoed in your mind.

He initiated a rhythmic motion, penetrating and withdrawing, targeting your most sensitive depths, obscene wet sounds, thumb still teasing your bud. Overwhelmed by the intensity, you sought stability, bringing your index finger to your mouth, biting down to anchor yourself. "You can grab my hair, baby," he suggested, prompting a satisfying sigh as you obediently followed his directive.

As the synchronization of your movements intensified, he decided to elevate the pleasure further. His mouth joined the sensual dance, lasciviously spitting your core, eliciting a contented hum from you.

As his mouth drew near your clit, enveloping it ably, a scream escaped your lips, worthy of a scene of a pornographic film. His name slipped through your mouth, an inadvertent encouragement that fueled his tenacity to excel, delve deeper, move faster, and render you numb in ecstasy.

In the intimacy, he displayed a reflection of his approach on the field, always seeking ways to enhance and achieve peak performance, a relentless pursuit of reaching his full potential at what he knew he was one of the bests, even when he didn't want to admit it.

There was no sweeter melody than your filthy moans. His crotch throbbed aching, aware that just a few pumps would make him reach his climax. But he needed to focus on you first, even though he rolled his hips against the concrete, trying to calm down his needs.

He groaned, shutting his eyes and digging his tongue into your hole. Your legs entwined around his neck, the tight knot of pleasure building as you moved your hips in tandem with the rhythm of his tongue.

"Pedri, I'm..." You shouted, the words hanging in the air unfinished, as he entered both, fingers with tongue, increasing the pace with each successive motion.

He opened his eyes again, locking onto yours, brimming with passion beneath the sun. His nose brushing against your clit, combined with his bambi-like eyes in contrast to the authority he held over you, escalate the moment as you tightly grasped his hair, evoking the release of your juices.

He couldn't help but stop pressing against the wall and squeeze his shaft inescapably, captivated by the way you adhered to what he said, even if it meant he had to assert control with a firm hand, correcting your inclination to lean back a few times.

He loved how obedient you were and how your body reacted.

Your high-pitched sounds spurred him to slip his hand inside his swim trunks, almost moaning at the sensations created by his own touch and the enticing arch of your back. He found himself immersed in the sweet taste and intoxicating fragrance that surrounded him.

He went up and down with his hand on his dick fervently, trembling in sync with you. "Are you going to come, my love? Do it for me," his deep voice making you feel so close. You played with one of your hardened nipples between your fingers. You affirmed with the other hand on his hair, and he hummed against you in response. "Oh, my god." you mumbled.

His vibrations heightened your euphoria, and the combination of his tongue and fingers left you feeling overstimulated. As you screamed arching your back, you became undone, laying flat, straightening your arms at your side and shuddering as you felt him persisting in his ministrations.

Too blind to reach his own pleasure to think about anything else, he continued pounding his dick, gripping his tip as he parted his lips, releasing ecstatic sounds and feeling the reverberations across his body. Leaning against your abdomen, he sensed his shots filling his shorts as he lowered his pace.

You tenderly ran your fingers through his sweaty hair, both basking in the tranquility of the moment as his chest rose and fell. Minds empty.

"Come here, baby," you whispered. He propelled himself up from the water and leaned flat at your side.

As you lay down on the cold poolside with him, he placed his hand on your waist, burying his head in your neck. He rubbed his nose, sensing how your perfume delicately mixed with expelled pheromones, obtaining a small giggle from you.

You swung your leg over his waist, leaning your chest towards him, and stroked his wet hair.

"Thank you," you smiled with closed eyes, sighing. "It's just what I needed."

"I like hearing that," he said, pulling away from your neck to look into your eyes. You looked like a fallen angel with your smudged mascara, swollen lips, tired eyes, and blush spreading across your cheeks.

His gaze instinctively dropped to your neck, observing the love mark on your skin. Though in his mind, he still questioned if this was truly love.

Without delving too much into his thoughts, he gently pecked your lips.

"Pedri..." you sighed, coming down from the adrenaline rush. Sitting up, you supported yourself with your hands and looked at him, recalling internet articles and Elena's words.

"Already want to talk about that?" he asked, huddled up, absorbing the remaining sunlight.

"I'm going to shower," you said, rising from the ground, creating a space for anticipation, allowing him to process and reflect. You knew the house perfectly, having visited many times with the understanding that no one could see you and spend the entire day together.

But meaningful memories were scarce, and you clung to them, hoping that someday it could be more than the fear of being seen together, unable to go to a restaurant or travel together.

You entered the shower, letting the cold water make you reconsider your beliefs. You trusted that, for the first time, you had found something real, a gentleman who stood out in the world of ordinary men, wanting to keep you safe.

You also trusted that you would walk on nails and endure all the thorns of a rose just to be with him. But genuinely, love should be about facing painful situations to prove love for a person, or love should feel welcoming, a place where you would stay for eternity if it had to be so?

You analyzed it, the rain falling on you as you cleaned your body. You wouldn't stay with Pedri; he never felt like a place where you could unload all your baggage without fear.

After all, coming from past relationships, he was your sanctuary at first, stemming from more deficient and unstable experiences. You couldn't stop the solitary tear that escaped your eye.

Since the night you met, you should have realized that nothing good could come from something that was supposed to be just for a night. But you didn't want to listen.

You left the shower, unable to continue ruminating in your head without fainting in the attempt. The drops that weren't allowed to fall from your tear ducts were released by your hair.

You grabbed your clothes, still absorbed in your thoughts. When you finished dressing, you placed your hand on the doorknob. Behind it lay the definition of the future of this strange relationship, and the confrontation was something that terrified you.

You walked into the living room to find him seated, wrestling with his thoughts, head bowed, facing away. Approaching him, you crossed your arms in front of his neck and hugged him, taking in his freshly scented and the slight dampness of his hair. He looked at you wearily, unsure of what would happen, and you gave him a kiss on the cheek before sitting next to him on the gray sofa.

You took his hand with love; you couldn't deny that, despite everything, he had been the source of most of your joys in the last four months. You took a deep breath before letting it out and started speaking.

"Are you mine?" His hand tensed, and his brow furrowed. He didn't understand where such a sudden question came from.

"What?" He responded confused, almost pulling away from you.

"Are you mine or not?" You still hoped for a more certain answer.

"I don't understand where your question is coming from." His expression showed he had never really thought about something like that. At least, was there some kind of feeling for you in his heart? You wondered which person you had been with all this time.

"Just answer it." You let go of his hand; your voice carried a tone of desperation and anguish. You knew you wouldn't get anywhere, but you still needed to cling to the few hopes that remained.

"I don't understand what you mean by 'yours'; we never talked about..." He tried to make another excuse in front of your eyes. It felt as if he were treating you like a little girl, who would eventually leave the question unanswered once she got tired.

"I need to know where we stand! Do you want to be with me or not?" You no longer knew why you kept trying about something that wouldn't change. You stood up from the sofa, and he avoided looking at you.

"Why do you have to make it so complicated? We're just having fun." He shrugged his shoulders, shaking his head. That response could have been worse than a straightforward no.

"Having fun? Do you think I'm with you to have fun with how the media calls me a slut, Pedro?" You shook your head in disbelief, letting out a bitter, pained laugh. "Four months enduring your ambiguities while defending you in front of my friends, saying you needed time." Your voice faltered, recalling all the arguments you had faced, thinking that at some point, everything would change.

"I didn't think you felt that way." He detached himself from his actions, as if it were so simple. Still avoiding eye contact.

"You said you loved me! Did you ever feel genuine love for me?" Your heart tightened; all this couldn't be a big lie where you were the only one playing a game that was already resolved.

"I don't know." He whispered, unsure of how you would react to such an unsure yet determinant answer. Your eyes blurred with contained tears; you couldn't cry like this in front of him.

"You knew everything you were doing; you knew that I was yours, and you didn't care." You screamed, desperate for him to show some emotion, to show that something of everything you had experienced had a hint of reality.

"It wasn't like that." He replied in the same flat tone, this time looking at you and realizing the tears that were falling, while you were motionless, feeling the room spin around you, and your ears ringing again.

"It was exactly like that." You had been sincere from your first conversation, under that neon light on a private yacht. A party where you didn't want to be, he approached you for that simple reason; you were the only girl who hadn't looked at him.

And you had found someone whom you thought had the will and power to heal all your wounds. But you ended up dancing with shadows in glass, with something ephemeral that you thought could be eternal. While you ended up being one of the many prey in his history.

"I gave you everything, I told you about my past and how I needed someone to trust, and you ended up being like everyone else." You released a silent sob and headed towards the room, where you had left your backpack. You were supposed to spend a weekend together, and now everything was withered. Your feigned acts of believing that magic still existed were in vain.

"Where are you going?" You gasped, bumping into him in the door frame; he placed his hands on your shoulders, concerned.

"I called Elena; she'll come to pick me up." You hadn't even talked to your best friend when you sneaked away with Pedri at noon; she would do everything to stop you from leaving, and you preferred not to tell her. But she, without hesitation, as soon as you asked, was already on her way.

"We can try to fix it." You knew he was only offering the response your ears craved. But you weren't going to fall for his spells. This time, his method of still having your strings to manipulate you like a puppet wouldn't work.

"I won't be with someone who never cared about me." You walked to the door, lowering the latch, and turned around once more; he looked at you from a considerable distance. He wasn't going to try to stop you, and that was what hurt the most. "Good luck, Pedro."

You left the house, and the evening air enveloped you. You walked along the walkway made of rocks, each step feeling heavier than the last. Another relationship failing, another person disappointing and discarding you like a crumpled note, forgotten in the margins of a story that never reached its intended conclusion.

Your tears flowed freely down your cheeks now that you weren't facing him. You stood on the street, waiting for Elena to arrive. She had every right to tell you 'I told you so,' and she would be justified.

You saw her black car approaching from the end of the street, parking right in front of you. You hesitated for a moment to get in, embarrassed to ignore someone who only sought your happiness.

She rolled down the window, and your eyes locked inviting you in. Opening the door, she extended her arms, offering solace. Tears streamed down your face as you looked for refuge on her shoulder.

"I'm so sorry, Ele." You lifted your head, and she gently wiped away your tears. Shaking her head, she dismissed your apologies.

"I'll always be here by your side. You're the one who needs to learn, but I'll never leave you adrift, okay?" You pouted, and your tears continued to flow.

You both settled back into your seats, stealing glances at the house. A part of you lingered there, and a lump formed in your throat. You sensed that distancing yourself was the only thing that could save you from descending into delirium. Now, you must gather the fragments of your heart once more and rebuild it on your own.

Your eyes went directly to the hickey he had left. You wanted to rip that skin off, not wanting to have him in your memories in any way.

Leaning your head against the window, you wondered what could have been if fame hadn't been the haunting specter in your life. You guessed that you will never actually know.

#pedri x reader #pedri angst #pedri smut #pedri x you #pedri x y/n #football x reader #football imagine #football angst #football smut #pedri imagine

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undercover-horn-blog · 5 days

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An authority figure who is super annoyed with somebody who has a bad cold. Think... conductor in an orchestra, sports coach... Somebody mean.

They go "What the fuck is wrong with you, [last name]?"

The person's voice is all thick and hoarse. "I have a cold, sir."

"A cold?" Cue the disgusted look.

Everyone feels so, so bad for this person, but they would never speak up. Too scary.

"Swear to god, if you don't stop sniffling right now, I'll stop being so polite."

A while later this authority figure is chewing the sickie out (again) for making some kind of mistake, yelling at them close to their face. They stop abruptly when a weird expression takes hold of sickie's face. There's confusion initially, then the cause becomes evident.

Sickie gets a withering look. "[Last name.] Don't you DARE -"

"heh'CHieWw!"

After that... the most intense eye contact ever. Sickie will either get... his throat ripped out or the most disgruntled "bless you" ever uttered.

#snz #snzblr #snz kink #snz thoughts #snzfic #sicknario #sicknarios #whump #sickfic #whump writing #look... idk what the hell possessed me to write this either okay?#so sorry

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bloopitynoot · 8 months

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3 Shadowgast fics that made me ugly cry

Okay so I read a LOT of shadowgast fanfics and I wanted to share some of the ones that made me absolutely weep. (I was going to wait until tomorrow but I got too excited to share).

All of these have some intense emotional distress, but I promise you all they may be angsty but they absolutely have happy endings.

They are all set in very different AU's, are hefty completed fics, and have similar feels!

1. the breathe before the phrase

(171513 words) by @kmackatie Chapters: 20/20 Rating: Explicit Summary: The ringing note of a concert A is played by the oboe, echoing on its own in the space. It’s picked up by the wind section, followed rapidly by the brass, and the familiar feeling of an orchestra calibrating takes over Caleb. The tonal adjustments as each person brings their instrument into alignment sinks into him and something inside Caleb shifts in recognition as Essek leads the strings into their own tuning. It’s like something is waking up, like something unfurling and firing across long-unused paths of memory. His hands shake slightly, as he raises his bow and joins them, fingers fumbling against the pegs and fine tuners that give him control over his instrument. ---- Essek Thelyss is a leading violinist, his spot as Shadowhand of the Rosohna Philharmonic Orchestra has been uncontested for over a decade. Caleb Widogast is a recent arrival to the city, convinced by his friends to audition for one of the vacant violinist positions. After starting off on the wrong foot, Caleb and Essek get to slowly know each other, discover what brings them joy, create while defying expectations, and find out that what they can produce together may just be better than anything they can do separately.

Why I cried: The amount of pressure put on Essek made my heart absolutely shatter. That plus the pinning between Caleb and Essek had me weeping. The hurt/comfort energy. The bad parent Dierta and of course past Caleb Ickythong trauma healing. Other than the story itself Katie has put so much energy into explaining the music, the playlist is stunning, and the inspiration for the played pieces in the fic are grounded in actual compositions. No spoilers, but the ending is gorgeous <3

2.Till Human Voices Wake us

(66080 words) by @ariadne-mouse Chapters: 23/23 Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Additional Tags: Merman!Caleb, no Mighty Nein but otherwise canon setting/events, Neutral evil Essek, Essek-typical anxiety and fatalism, Loneliness, Hurt/Comfort, spooky gothic vibes, some horror and disturbing imagery, the ocean as a threat/love language, Illustrations, drowning themes Summary: Essek Thelyss, lonely and ambitious prodigy, comes to Nicodranas to make a risky gamble with the Assembly. At the water’s edge, he finds himself swept up in another dangerous entanglement he can't seem to escape — and as time goes on, he's less and less sure he wants to. Will his treasonous alliance or the sea itself devour him first? (Or, the one where Caleb is a merman.)

Why I cried: okay so look, this story was so fucking sad I can't even begin to describe it. The love and longing between the two, the tragic backstory for Caleb. Treason = death for Essek (it's a happy ending though so do not worry, but I definitely worried so you don't have to LOL). It also has some stunning art in it!!!

3. what luminous worlds await

what luminous worlds await (178674 words) by @essektheylyss Rating: Mature Additional Tags: Champion of the Luxon AU, Alternate Universe - Future, Space Opera, Religious Conflict, religious trauma, Violence, Minor Character Death, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Dreams vs. Reality, Demisexual Essek Thelyss, Past Character Death, Grief/Mourning, Angst, Fictional Religion & Theology, Implied/Referenced Sex, Mention of Using Sex as Self-Harm, several immortals grapple with loss while trying to save the world, so so many liberties taken with consecution, this wouldn't be a problem if you'd EXPLAIN matthew mercer, and/or if a certain drow would give literally any straight answers, (I mean he can't give straight answers when he's not straight), Background Fjorester (Past), Post-Canon, …very post-canon Summary: “You seek my nature. It is a lonely endeavor. Would you like to join me on this path?” “Yes.” — After a thousand years, a divine champion awakes in a lightless cave above Port Damali with little memory to speak of and a beacon in his hands. Even as he struggles to piece the past together and process what he has lost while he slept, the future demands he answer for the crimes of his elders. It offers little in return, but perhaps there are fragments of possibility awaiting him.

Why I cried: Omg oh boy, this one made me BIG cry- honestly one of my favourite fics I have read so far. A true space opera, a story of love, in many forms, over time, space, and multiple lives. I sobbed from chapter one literally until the end. Though I think you will need an A03 account to read this one, but it is worth the wait to set one up. My partner watched me cry so much while I read this. I totally did download and save this fic to send to pals so they can cry with me. It is worth the agony for this happy ending. I might still be crying LOL

#for the shadowgast shippers #shadowgast #shadowgast recs #caleb widogast #essek thelyss #cr m9 #mighty nein #critical role #honestly some of them I sobbed while explaining the premise to my partner because I have a lot of feelings #these are all worth the length

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lilliankoo · 7 months

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wanna play you like a game: jeon jungkook. 0

series masterlist!

pairing: villian? antagonist! tribe leader jk x princess! y/n.

trope: "he's mean to everyone but worships the ground you walk on" will absolutely do anything for you, strangers to lovers.

word count: 1.5k-ish (short caus this is an intro?)

warnings: nothing too bad lmao….yet. conditions, mentions abt blessings from a deity/goddess, power dynamics, talks abt manipulating a man *clears throat*, bowing, one forehead kiss 😘, controlling mother. I apologize if I missed anything.

author’s note: how dare i release a new series while titanic! is barely done.. english is not my first language so…, not a professional writer. im an occasional writer meaning I write when i feel like writing or get that random motivation so expect slightly late updates.

While humming one of the lullabies she used to sing to you as a child, your mother finishes braiding the pink ribbon in your hair. She reaches for the brush on the dresser and brushes your hair one last time. She looks at you, more like your reflection in the mirror, as she places her brush-clad hand on your shoulder. As you stare at her, your brows are furrowed and your lips are pursed. Your mother makes eye contact and adds, "You dread me now, but trust me, you will thank me later." "How can you treat your own daughter like this?" You ask her with grief in your voice but have given up fighting her for whatever reason. You have made the choice not to yell and cry at your mother's heartless decision.

Being the only daughter of “mir konvo’s” king, you truly don't have any other choice. you got to know yesterday that you are being "offered" to the head of the forest tribe, Jeon Jungkook; who is even more powerful than your father's entire empire and is known as the most powerful man. His forest known as “lav” completely encloses your "mir konvo", While Jeon Jungkook dominates the entire Lav Forest, your father rules Mir Konvo-which is also known as the “heart of lav” since its right in the middle of the forest. For hundreds of years, your kingdom and the Jeon tribe had a peaceful agreement under which your people were permitted to use the forest trail to conduct trade with other kingdoms, with no involvement on the part of the Jeon tribe. However, the Jeon tribe simply requested rice and gold as payment. This agreement has been effective for years, but Jeon Jungkook, the current tribe head, has destroyed it and established a new requirement. He now demands your hand in marriage or otherwise he will seal all pathways leading to the mir konvo, seize control of the kingdom, and assassinate the current king—your father—if you refuse. The entire country is aware of the forest goddess' blessing on the Jeon tribe, according to which no man will ever be able to defeat or oppose them. Which naturally leads to your father immediately signing the treaty and beginning the "preparations" for your marriage out of fear.

Now, back to your question. your mother sighs and stands in front of you. Holding your shoulders, your mother whispers quietly, "Listen to me and listen to me very carefully." "No man can resist a woman in this world. There is a reason a strong man like him would want to wed you. Take advantage of this, dominate him, break him, and make it difficult for him to live without you" she says while looking at you. The venom that drips from her words is quite evident, her jaw is clenched and her hands are digging your shoulders. And you exactly understand what she means by that. you pay keen attention to her words, thinking about them over and over again. looking at your frightened expression, your mother asks you, "Do you understand?" You take a cautious breath and nod hesitantly in agreement.

The entire palace is decorated and adored with white flowers. The orchestra plays a light tune- the atmosphere is serene yet tense. Everyone is displaying their fake contentment but in reality everyone is scared- including you. your father is standing near the window looking outside- his crown is not on his head, royal mantle no longer on his shoulders. from his disheveled hair to dark circles under his eyes- anyone can tell he is distressed. you walk over to him and stand by his side.

“What is on your mind, father?” you ask him. your father sighs deeply and looks at you.

“He is an evil man, your mother is not thinking-” your father’s words are cut abruptly by your mother’s voice.

“I am doing this because of the kingdom’s safety, no man can defeat him, you will die if you stand against him!” your mother shouts at your father. “you are not seeing this through my eyes, nothing will happen to y/n” she adds while maintaining eye contact with him. you stand there confused and look at the encounter between them two. He drops his head low and nods at your mother. He doesn't say anything but looks at you with subtle tears in his eyes.

The moment is cut short when one of the soldier’s runs inside to inform your father that they need to leave as soon as possible. Another condition jungkook proposed was that the marriage will take place in the forest and only three people can join- you, your father and your mother.

That's how you find yourself in a carriage with your parents. your mother is well dressed while your father is dressed modestly. The commute to the lav forest isn’t that far, that's why your carriage reaches the lav village’s entrance gate in 3 hours. you step out of the carriage and your mother quickly helps you fix your skirts and dress. There’s no man in sight to receive your family. Your father looks around to see if there is any member of jeon tribe and he sees no one. The atmosphere is too quiet and serene. The leaves rustle while the wind lightly breezes.

“the carriage stay here, come” a sudden voice of a man coming from behind you pulls you out of your trance. You turn around and see a man no older than 25, dressed in leather and furs, his left hand holding a spare, his long hair reaching his back. He is incredibly handsome- you can't deny that fact. The man looks at you then motions your father to follow him. You and your parents follow the man and enter the village- the route isn’t too difficult, the path is smooth with no stones in sight and you are sure that it was cleared for your comfort and ease. After 10 minutes of walking, the huts and houses start appearing. You can see people sneakingly looking at your family from their windows- some are whispering while others cryptically smile your way.

In some distance you can see a platform and a crowd surrounding it. The stage-like platform is only a few feet taller from the ground, and has two chairs in the centre. You can see few people standing on it having conversations- some are in serious conversation while others are laughing. you and your parents stand a few feet away from the stage and wait for the next instructions. you intertwine your hand with your fathers’ and squeeze it. you look around when suddenly everyone goes silent and falls to their knees- bowing at the person coming out from the big hut- situated behind the platform. The alleged man is dressed in black leather and furs, some of his hair tied back, there’s evident anger and fury in his eyes as he storms your way- in that moment, it is evident that the man walking your way is your future husband- jeon jungkook. Everyone around you is on their knees- including your parents. And out of fear, you bend your knees so you can bow too but suddenly someone grabs both of your shoulders and makes you stand straight. you look up in confusion and see him. Long gone is the anger from his eyes- all you see right now is love and affection. In an instant, Jungkook drops on his knees in front of you and bows. The entire village is bowing to him while he is on his knees for you.

your breath hitches because you do not know what you are supposed to do. Having a powerful man like Jungkook on his knees in front of you is a lot to handle. Your hands shakingly reach for his shoulders and you make him stand up. Jungkook stands up to his full height and towers above you. He cradles your jaw affectionately in both of his hands and kisses your forehead. you're confused and scared. Confused because he is not scary like he is described as and scared because he is alarmingly close to you. You avoid his eyes and look around. Everyone is still on their knees and you feel bad. You look at him and then the people bowing- and surprisingly he understands.

“Everyone stand up!” he shouts and everyone shuffles to stand up.

Then, jungkook smiles at you and your parents before saying “shall we begin the ritual ?”.

next: episode 1 - the pink ribbon

#jungkook fic #jungkook recs #jungkook fanfic #jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook #jungkook smut #jungkook #bts jungkook #jeon jungguk #jk fic #jungkook possessive #bts fic

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so-i-did-this-thing · 1 year

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Hey! A trans minor here. I want to ask how should I proceed as a trans minor in Florida? I can’t move and my mother doesn’t take me being trans seriously. She says she supportive but I don’t think she is. I’m worried about all these bills coming into place and how they will affect me. I’m a FTgender fluid. Do you have any advice? Also, I play the flute :) it’s nice to see trans instrument players

Ayyy, trans orchestra forming!

So, I won't insult your intelligence by pretending things aren't about to get bad. But maybe I can help you understand the risks and how to keep yourself safe and sane.

An assumption: I don't know if you want to pursue physical transition and that is a convo 100% between you, your mom, and your healthcare providers, so I'm providing it as a neutral option for information purposes.

Also: The bills I mentioned have not passed yet, but they are sitting on the governor's desk. He will most likely sign them, meaning they'll take effect July 1, 2023.

Staying with your family

SB254 is the bill that affects you the most. It's the "kidnapping" bill. Yeah. :/

I don't know what your family situation is like, but if you have family members who oppose your mother's even lukewarm support, that could be enough for the state to remove you from her custody and turn you over to them. It would be up to you and your mom to figure out how to avoid/appease these family members so they don't think you are "at risk" of physical transition.

Gender-affirming care

SB254 also completely locks you out of puberty blockers, HRT, and surgery (the latter 2 in the past are sometimes pursued by older youth with parental consent) in this state. If you want to pursue any of this care, talk with your mother about getting it in another state. You will have to physically travel, because telemed for gender affirming care is also being banned due to new consent form requirements.

Once you are 18, you can pursue physical transition, if that's something you're interested in, but be aware that there are soon going to be so many obstacles to adult care, that it might as well be a transition ban for everyone. But if you're close to 18 and think HRT is for you, review the map for informed consent care. But be prepared for a long search and your insurance not covering things.

That said, if you need a therapist now, I think you may still be good here. Be very careful that you don't end up with someone who wants to use conversion therapy tactics -- these are typically going to be religious-based providers. Talking with other trans kids in your town might help you find a good provider.

Remember, if you don't like a therapist, you can stop going to them; shop around for one that makes you feel safe and makes you feel like they help you with the stress in your life.

Bathroom ban

HB 1521 does a few things:

Bans multi-stall gender neutral bathrooms (single stall is fine)

Requires schools to have bathroom policies

Empowers cis people to confront trans folks in a govt owned/leased bathroom/changing room and force them to leave, otherwise they are subject to a fine and/or jail

This is effectively a bounty bill. Examples of bathrooms where this bill will apply include schools, airports, stadiums, courthouses, etc. It isn't every public bathroom, but it is a lot.

People who are gender nonconforming or are being stalked/harassed by cis folks who know their trans status are most at risk here.

It is up to you how much you want to weigh your self-expression against your physical safety.

As a minor, you don't have a lot of rights, so I advise you choose your battles carefully and always have trusted adults to have your back. Being FTGenderfluid, a lot of how you dress might fly under the radar, but I'd avoid being too heavily masc for now.

Keeping safe & sane

Unfortunately, a lot of support you'd normally find at school is going to be unavailable from now on. But some ways to lessen your stress:

Get a job (if you are old enough). I know, I know, but money makes a lot of life easier, from buying little treats now to stockpiling for things you may want once you turn 18.

Be honest with the reality that you might have to be in the closet a lot, and brainstorm safe outlets for your gender expression. I know at your age, I dressed how I wanted at home and used roleplaying games to explore and express my gender.

Hang out with queer youth, especially in person. You might have a local organization that has events and support groups. It helps a lot to share your feelings with other kids going through the same.

Start following trans political commentators. Erin is a good follow on Substack - she makes it easy to understand all the legal stuff going on.

Consume happy queer stories, by queer authors. It will help counter all the doom scolling. I've been watching Dead End: Paranormal Park (it is a comic and a show), which features a trans masc protagonist.

Cultivate your relationship with your mom. Gently, but firmly set boundaries with her if she gives you guff for, I dunno, wearing boys jeans or whatever. But also be aware she probably has a lot of misinformation about trans people, so you will need to gently pick that apart and see how you can educate her. Trusted adults she also trusts can also help you here.

Build your network. The friends your age you make today could be roommates or coworkers tomorrow. Be social, it will also be good for your mental health.

Be kind to yourself. Things look bleak, but there are states in the US that are actually strengthening trans rights. There continue to be options, you just might need to spend time and resources achieving them.

I hope that helps, and a big hug from a trans adult who grew up in the closet. <3

#trans stuff #anon #transgender

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octuscle · 9 months

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So I activated the "Blending In" preset in the Chronivac and set it to Slow Burn mode. I'm not sure how long it would take to make changes, but to have some fun, I also made sure I'm only partially aware.

Went to this gym nearby, though maybe it was bad timing that there were those toxic school bullies and big meatheads. Well, they're actually fine when they start talking with me like I belonged. Maybe they're alright.

Of course you're not one of them. You play the cello in the school orchestra, are active in the student council and are involved in animal protection. But still, it was cool with the guys. Their tips sounded quite useful. And after you had a big protein shake with the boys after training, you had a lot of fun farting in the competition. No question, you came in last place.

Then outside the gym they went back to pretending they didn't know you. Nick, the alpha meathead, almost ran you over with his motorbike in the gym car park. Anyway, maybe he just didn't see you.

The next morning you wake up full of energy. You jump out of bed, do 100 push-ups and 100 sit-ups and go to the bathroom. Hehehehe, should there really be some beard fuzz? You shave every morning anyway, hoping that the beard will finally grow more. Maybe that will finally be successful. Don't bother with the shower. Today you're going to the gym again after school anyway, so you can take a shower then. A quick sniff in the armpit. Still working. To save time, you put on yesterday's gym clothes for school.

In class today you find it harder than usual to concentrate. In maths you actually nod off for a few minutes. But Nick actually greets you in the corridor with a fist bump. And he even talks to you when you finally get to lie on the weight bench and lift weights after school. After the workout, the boys ask you if you'd like to come watch football in the diner. You'd love to. But you have driving school today. You want to finally get your licence for the motorbike.

The next morning, when you go to the bathroom after your run, push-ups and sit-ups, you notice that you didn't shower yesterday. Armpit check. Fuck, you finally smell like a man. And the hair in your armpits finally comes out. You pose in front of the mirror. Yes, the training is paying off. And the protein shakes too. You'll be further ahead in the next farting competition.

You forgot to do your homework at school. That has never happened to you before in your life. When your French teacher asks you how you want to excuse it (en francais, s'il vous-plait), you let out a loud burp. You have detention. The boys in the back row applaud. And burp even louder. Gym is cancelled today. Or rather, it will take place for all of you without dumbbells during detention. With burpees and farts. When you are released, your teacher has to hold a handkerchief over her mouth and nose.

On the way to school, Nick and you have a race on your motorbikes. Shit, you lose. And the winner gets to fart in the loser's face during the bench press. Nick's farts are the worst. Thank God the first two hours are sport. Football is your favourite hobby after pumping iron. And Coach is very happy with you. Let's see if the quarterback position works out for you next season. At the end of practice, Coach reads out a message that you are specifically asked to shower after practice. Classmates and faculty have complained. What pussies! But you combine the pleasant with the useful. When jerking off in the shower, you become second in width to the cum.

Saturday at last! All day in the gym and then cruising with the bikes in the evening. Nick is already waiting for you, talking football with your old man. And about the army. If graduation doesn't work out, this could be a real alternative for you. Your father was in the Navy Seals himself and, unlike your mother, doesn't think it's a bad idea.

At the gym, Nick is whining about how envious he is of your beard growth. And how shitty he thinks it is that his parents don't allow him to get tattoos. Anyway, after the summer it's either college or military academy. Then you can do whatever you want.

#male tf #muscle tf #reality change #chronivac #inked man #hairy pits #male transformation #muscle transformation

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mybrokenveins3000 · 8 months

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He Likes Weddings - reader x Ross Macdonald oneshot

A/N: Here's some ridiculously sweet fluff for the broken Tumblr user's soul.

word count: 1.8k

♫ Kiss Me - Sixpence None The Richer

You're outside of the wedding venue standing on a bench. Your phone speaker is at full volume, and you're barely coping with the bad signal and the heat of the countryside.

"What do you mean you're not coming?" you sigh into the mic.

As a stream of apologies pours down the line, you spot a tall figure out of the corner of your eye.

He's dressed in a dark navy suit with his long dark hair tied up. He's doing a bad job of pretending he's not eavesdropping, eyeing you behind cigarette smoke. Despite his tough exterior and obvious nosiness, you figure it's difficult to be intimidated by a man with small, white flowers poking out of his jacket pocket.

"I don't care if something came up at work, this is the wedding of YOUR friends-- I DON'T KNOW ANYONE HERE!!"

You feel like those little, rich girls in Christmas movies who just want their dads to come home. But in this case, it's mid-July, home is the middle of nowhere, and dad is your disappointing, workaholic best friend.

"You know what, I'm just gonna go home if you won't--"

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

She hung up. Great.

As you lower your phone, you turn to face the audience of your little altercation, smoke escaping him as he laughs. It strikes you at that very moment how ridiculous you look, sweaty and flushed in your silk summer dress, standing on a memorial bench before a wedding.

He disposes of his cigarette as he approaches you. You get a clearer look at him and the situation - his pristine three-piece suit despite the weather, the pocket flowers, and what you assume to be a celebratory smoke before tying the knot. Fuck.

"Won't you stay?" he asks playfully offended, squinting as you foreground the blinding sun. He lends you a gentlemanly hand to help you off of the bench.

"NO! No, I am staying-- for sure!" you assure this man whom you've never met before in your life, hobbling off of the bench. "I mean, of course I'd stay for your wedding!"

"Sorry?"

"Congratulations! You must be so excited! Great weather too," you gulp.

His eyes widen in realisation, he cracks a slight smirk.

"Oh, darling, I'm not the groom"

You cock your head in confusion, eyes raking up and down his person, particularly the flower-pocket region.

"I'm not a groomsman either... I just really like weddings."

Now you're even more confused, but also pleasantly surprised.

"Well, in that case, I'll be going," you finally say, scooping your purse up from the bench, ready to walk back the way you came.

"You should stay," he exclaims after you.

"I don't know any of these people"

"You know me."

Oh.

He revels in the silence of your surprise. His eyes are like a child's, so persuasive and mischievous.

"And you are?"

"Ross," he extends his hand to shake yours, the same hand that helped you just a second ago, "I don't have a plus-one either."

Suddenly, the idea of this bearded, long-haired adult man getting ready for a wedding on his own flashes in your mind. Him excitedly putting on his suit and fixing his tiny pocket of flowers in the mirror. What a peculiar man. But you can't help smiling to yourself at the thought.

You hear the orchestra start up and people making their way to their seats from inside. You see bridesmaids and groomsmen assembling a few paces away.

He offers you an arm to loop yours into. Whilst you've rolled your eyes a record amount of times in your first few minutes of knowing this man, you accept his arm and walk into the venue.

---

You settled down next to him in one of the rows nearer to the back. Inside, it's beyond elaborate with flowers draped over every surface area conceivable to the human eye.

You glance over at him and he is so pure, so happy to be there. He is practically overflowing with excitement. The plan to go back home had escaped from your memory completely.

"You see that lady," he whispers to you, pointing at an older woman in a ridiculous bright yellow dress and hat combo, "that's the groom's overbearing aunt. All these flowers were her idea."

You give him a surprised, amused look, smiling at his knowledge. He winks at you.

"Ooh, and this one," he points to a man slumped over in the pews, definitely hungover, "that's the bride's ex."

"No way?!"

"Yes way!"

As more and more people file in, you gasp "oohs" and "ahhs" as you point at interesting characters and, like a human encyclopedia, Ross dishes back everything there is to know about them. This activity proves itself incredibly entertaining until the ceremony begins for good.

You absentmindedly brush dust off his suit jacket, straightening his tie and flowers whilst you're at it. If people were watching, you reckon they'd think you two were really together. You didn't mind that at all.

As the double doors open to reveal the bride, you see Ross' heart physically skip a beat. He's glassy-eyed, holding his chest where his heart is. He's more animated than the damn groom, you thought.

You find it endearing how he can look like the pinnacle of masculinity and yet fold so easily at dramatic displays of affection. Nothing could possibly ruin this moment for him, not the snoring from the hungover ex, not even the Nokia ringtone interrupting the officiator.

There were multiple instances during the ceremony where you thought he would crack. The flower girls and the father giving the bride away were moments met with a tear or two, much to your amusement. The vows were another honourable mention, of course. But it was the "I dos" and that final kiss that got him. How cliché, you laugh to yourself. And he's LOST it, hand over his mouth to stifle his lovesick cries. Your own hand over your mouth to stifle your laughter.

As the crowd cheers and hollers, him particularly louder than everyone else, you whip out a packet of tissues from your purse. He accepts them appreciatively, first blotting his face gently, then submitting to fully sobbing into the tissues.

You know you should be watching the happy couple, but all you can do is look at him.

Even though you just met, you are so certain you've never met anyone like him in your whole life. I'd never stay at a stranger's wedding for anyone else.

---

Having calmed this man down after the ceremony, you've been spending the whole reception by his side. The fact you've stuck right by this random man for so long feels like it should alarm you, but it doesn't. He seems to shine mingling with other guests with a glass of champagne in hand and eyes shining under the fairy lights, it's an image that you want to be familiar to you.

There's an instance where he finally introduces you to the newly married couple.

After a string of rehearsed "thank yous" from the couple, Ross beams "This is my date!", tipsy on his third or fourth drink, "We met this morning!"

"Ah, you must be the ACTUAL groom," you exclaim, shaking the groom's hand enthusiastically, much to his confusion, "HAPPY WEDDING!"

---

It's the couple's first dance, you and Ross are sitting next to each other, having moved his name tag to where your friend was supposed to sit. Couldn't think of a better replacement, no offence.

As the couple sway to a slow love song, you are surprised as, for once, his eyes aren't on the festivities but on you.

"Ross Macdonald, you're staring," you say as if you've known him for years, surpassing formalities and entering familiar territory.

You see him smile into his hand, eyes not moving. For a guy you've met only a few hours ago, you sure feel comfortable around him.

And, god, are you having fun.

Through slightly drunk vision, there's a vision, a daydream, of you and him dancing - you in white, him in the same, elaborate suit, same pocket of flowers, same enthusiasm. Rationally speaking, the thought is way too rash and inapt, but nice to think about under the warmth of his fingers playing with your dress.

"This is a very nice material," he mumbles. You lost count of the amount of drinks he's had.

"Am I going to be looking after you the entire night?"

"Consider yourself lucky," he smirks.

And you did. Consider yourself lucky, that is.

He plucks a flower out of the tiny bunch in his pocket and slides one behind your ear. His hand lingered against your face for a second longer.

"Beautiful"

---

It was an orchestra in the morning, jazz band in the evening sort of event. His suit jacket lay over your purse on your chair, empty glasses were strewn across your side of the table, and you're both destroying the dance floor. And you're laughing and shining with this stranger. There are not enough unafraid, unabashedly joyful men in the world, you think, the only one is spinning you around to a jazz cover of ABBA songs.

In a moment of dizziness, you fall backwards almost crushing one of the children, who was running around more so than dancing, but Ross catches you, holding you the dramatic, fairytale way.

"Hi!"

"Hi."

---

You find the pair of you sitting on that same bench you were stood on in the morning when you first met, which now feels like a lifetime ago. The jazz band is still playing away in the background, and you're both giggly from the excessive dancing and drinking, legs overlapping each other as you share a cigarette - you feel like a teenager.

"So, are you planning on tying the knot anytime soon? Have a wedding of your own? You clearly love them," you exhale the smoke into the midsummer night and pass the cigarette back to him.

"One day," he looks over at you, "if I meet the right girl," you glance right back at him. You both burst out in peals of laughter.

"You know what?"

"What?"

"You," you jab at him slightly feeling floppy, like your limbs are made of dust, "you are made for weddings, I even thought you were the groom!"

He gives you a look of disbelief, but you insist. He blushes hard as he exhales the white, romantic smoke. He passes the cigarette back to you, which is now stained with your lipstick. You could see a trace of it on his lips in the light.

After a final puff, you admit "I wasn't really a fan of weddings... not until today."

"Oh, really?"

"This is the first one I've went to that I actually enjoyed"

And it won't be the last, he wants to say.

"You don't believe in happy endings?" he says instead.

You're in this moment, suspended outside of time, in what seems to be an alternative timeline. You don't want to imagine how your night would look if you went home. Your life looks a lot different from this angle - it's about having fun, it's about saying yes or even:

"Actually, I do."

---

Friend: You're in the background of almost everyone's insta stories btw Friend: I thought you said you went home? You: [photo] meet my date You: aka your brother-in-law xoxo Friend: ?!?!

---

A/N: Guys, I hate to break it to you but I am feeling GOOD ABOUT THIS. This is VERY MUCH inspired by this particular blurb in the teacher!Ross universe by my friend and confidant @hypersonic04 because THERE NEEDS TO BE MORE FICS ABOUT ROSS AT WEDDINGS!! I went for a 2000s romcom kinda vibe. RIP if you're waiting on me to FINALLY graze smut/NSFW territory, I am a soft girl at the end of the day - sue me! Anyways, I really hope you enjoyed, love you forever!!!

#lol im in so much pain #ross macdonald #the 1975 #1975 band #fanfic #matty healy #adam hann #george daniel #matty the 1975 #asks #ross macdonald x reader #ross macdonald fic #ross macdonald fanfiction #ross macdonald imagine #wedding ross macdonald #wedding au #ross macdonald oneshot

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