#too bad i forget to do it until I'm starving

[inexplicablyhigh]

My desire to gain weight vs my inability to properly feed myself

[galacticgraffiti]

❁ Sugar (I've developed a taste for you) ❁

!!! NSFW ⋆ 18+ ⋆ Minors DNI !!!

Summary: Astarion asks for a favour and ends up getting more than what he bargained for (or: I'm a lesbian but this fictional little vampire twink can get it)

Rating: Explicit (for eventual smut) Wordcount: 2.4k Descriptors: I try to keep my reader-inserts fairly neutral, but let me know if anything slips through the cracks! Astarion is his usual self, pathetic and awful yet somehow also lovable as fuck. CW: bad flirting, friends with benefits (and the benefit is bloodsucking lol), blood, blood drinking, biting, hint of praise kink, eventual proper smut, nicknames, so much innuendo

✦⋆ Main Masterlist ⋆✦⋆ If you prefer AO3 ⋆✦

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Chapter 1: My my, those eyes like fire

He could be lovely if he wasn’t so self-involved.

That is the first thought you have when you meet Astarion. He is not downright mean, but something about him just bugs you. He flirts with every creature on two legs (sometimes even those with more), but that’s not it.

Something about all his honeyed words just feels so… insincere. 

You think Astarion has something to hide, and you desperately want to know what it is. So far, he has shown no signs of weakness, and he is as much as self-entitled twat as when you first met him. And this continues to be your opinion of him… up until today.

The day has been hard. Your feet hurt, your hands have blisters, and you are smeared with blood pretty much all over. Your shirt has been ripped and frankly, you don’t know when you might find the time to mend it. There is a giant bloodstain on the thigh of your trousers, and you are pretty sure your hair has become completely encrusted in blood quite some time ago.

But you have made it back to camp and that is all that counts.

As you shake out your bedroll and try to ignore the fact that this is the seventh night in a row that you’ll have had bland stew for dinner, you catch Astarion’s eyes across the fire.

His gaze is… odd.

You have seen him in the heat of battle, you’ve seen the glint in his eye when he comes up with another of his devious plans. You’ve even seen him amused, shaking with laughter when Gale recited an - admittedly very ambiguous - poem to you.

But you have never seen him like this. It’s not affection, nor is it desire that lights up his delicate features. He almost looks… desperate. Like he is starving for something, and you can’t place your finger on what it is.

As soon as Astarion notices that you have caught him, his eyes flick away. He saunters off, way too casual to not be obvious about it.

You stare after him, vaguely confused. But then, Karlach makes her way over to ask for more stew, and you forget all about it. For the moment.

Her smile makes your belly flutter, and you wish you knew more about her, and so you do your best to make conversation, joking and asking shallow questions.

Astarion’s eyes haunt you through dinner.

Even though the day was exhausting, the nights in your little camp are starting to grow on you. Gale is funny in his own, book-wormish way. You have learned that Karlach is downright hilarious in her joy about the world outside of Avernus, and Wyll is always scandalised by her, which is admittedly quite fun to watch. Lae’zel and Shadowheart keep to themselves a bit more, but even they share the meals with the rest of you.

You laugh when Karlach imitates Wyll’s horrified expression, but in spite of yourself. your eyes keep wandering to the silver hair of your elven companion who is sitting across from you.

Astarion is staring at you again, his eyes focused on some point below your jaw. He is watching you intently, seemingly unaware you have caught him. He doesn’t blink, doesn’t look away - he just stares at you as your spoon scrapes along the bottom of your bowl.

Only when you get up to wash off before you go to bed does he move again.

Sometimes, Astarion reminds you of a scared animal in the way he moves, his eyes flicking back and forth, his hands trembling slightly whenever he is not in battle. He hides right out in the open, behind his swagger and his dirty jokes and innuendos, behind his beautiful face and his beautiful body.

Tonight, though, even in all his desperation, Astarion is not prey. He is a predator. And like any talented predator, he has managed to get his prey away from the protection of the group.

You are kneeling in the small stream that runs by the camp, washing your bowl, your clothes, yourself - everything is dirty and soaked in mud, sweat and blood. You are barely wearing anything, but your companions have seen you in much more precarious situations at this point.

Astarion approaches quietly, sneaking up on you in that manner where you can never tell whether it is intentional or not. He is just… there, suddenly, shedding his clothes next to you, blood still smeared on his pale skin.

He stops short of the water, watching you from the riverbank. You try not to gawk as he undresses, but something about him seems unusually anxious. The way he pushes hit foot forward so slowly, testing the water, makes you wonder if he might not know how to swim.

Astarion smiles suddenly, taking a step into the stream and towards you, then another, his smile growing the deeper he wades into the water. Dark red streaks appear in the water where the blood is washed from his pale skin.

He clears his throat and raises a sharp brow.

“And how are you feeling tonight, sweet thing?” he inquires. His eyes flick over your body, focusing on a point below your ear for a moment before he rips his gaze away again.

“‘M alright,” you answer, brow furrowed as you scrub your shirt a little harder than you actually need to. Why he has to be so infuriating with his nicknames, you’ll never know. “Today was… a lot. I wanted to have a quiet moment.”

“Ah.”

He doesn’t seem to get the hint. He merely wades further into the stream, shimmering pearls of water running down his back. When you don’t say anything else, he turns to face you once again.

“Are you not going to ask me how I am, darling?”

“Wasn’t planning on it,” you mumble, throwing your shirt to the side, Clearly, you’re not getting anywhere with it tonight.

“Tsk, so rude. Somebody should really teach you some manners.” He clicks his tongue at you like you are an insubordinate child, shaking his head until droplets hit you.

You press your lips together. If he wasn’t so beautiful, he wouldn’t get away with half the things he does, and it frustrates you to no end. You catch yourself forgiving him on occasions where you don’t mean to, simply because his face is the prettiest things you have ever seen, and you hate it.

Astarion watches you carefully, gauging your mood. You stare back at him defiantly. What the hell could he want from you, anyway?

The hunger in his eyes is back, you notice - that desperation that you can’t quite place. There is a pained expression around his mouth, and despite all his cockiness, he is clearly not doing entirely well - his skin even paler than usual, his hands shaking a little when he crosses his arms.

Astarion yawns, his gaze raking over you in a way that makes you shiver. You tell yourself it’s just the cold of the water.

“Well, I was going to ask you for your help, but you are in a terrible mood.” He inspects his fingernails, and even though you know exactly that he is baiting you, you can’t help yourself.

“You? Need my help? Never thought the day would come.” Your voice is biting, but you can’t hide the note of curiosity that sneaks in.

“Don’t make me out to be such a horrible companion.” Astarion takes a step closer to you through the water. You take a step back. He laughs, but his eyes catch on your neck again. “I’m not that bad, am I?”

You shrug.

“Sometimes you are.”

“Hm.” He raises his brows, and takes another step towards you. This time, you don’t step back. “Well, I suppose that can’t be helped, my love. We all have good and bad days, don’t we?” He cocks his head. “And today has been quite hard for me.”

You make a non-committal noise, staring him down. What in the hells is he trying to do? Seduce you?

Your body likes that thought much more than your mind does.

Astarion is watching you intently. He stretches out his hand to take yours, and in your surprise, you don’t even pull back. His thumb rests right against the delicate inside of your wrist, and he closes his eyes.

You wait for him to drone on about how he carried your group on the battlefield, to gloat that you now owe him your life seven times over, but he doesn’t. Astarion stays eerily still, breathing deeply as his thumb strokes your wrist, pressing against your pulse point.

You can’t keep quiet any longer, not with the odd way he is behaving. Maybe he got hit by a spell, or…

“Any reason today was particularly hard for you?” You meant to sound sarcastic, but the question comes out sounding sincere. You scold yourself for caring so much.

Your skin burns like fire where he is touching you. Astarion’s eyes open, and he looks at you like he was a million miles away. He is so close now - much closer than you realised. You can see the fiery ring around his irises.

“I…” To your surprise, his voice is hesitant and quiet. “It’s easier to just… show you. You see, I need something from you, my darling.”

You frown.

“Why ask me? You could ask any of us, and most of them would be more inclined to help than I am. I’ve seen the way that Gale watches you at the fire-”

“Gale?” Astarion sounds genuinely amused. “Darling, do you think I’m asking you for sexual favours right now?”

“I- yes?” Your voice is full of uncertainty. “I mean… is that not what you were going to say?”

Astarion smiles, small and sharp.

“No.” He is even closer to you now, his thumb still caressing the skin of your wrist. “Even though I would not be disinclined if you offered… you are quite beautiful, you know?”

“Mh. Thank you?” You wish your heart would not beat faster at the way he looks at you. It’s a look that doesn’t fit the words that fall from his lips, a look that betrays the desperation with which he needs this favour. “What-”

“What I am asking for is simple.” He is so close now he could kiss you if you leaned in. “All I want is… a taste.”

“I- what?”

His lips are on your neck, his hand in your hair. You are not quite sure when that happened.

“Say yes, sweet thing,” he breathes. “Just a taste of your blood and-”

“My blood?” You sound more distraught than you actually feel. You are… oddly resigned. You should have seen this coming - you knew something was up with him, you knew he wasn’t telling you the whole truth.

And now, here you are. With a fucking vampire. His lips graze your pulse point, and your heart beats faster. You can feel the heat of his breath when he utters a single word.

“Please.”

It’s that one word that changes everything. Just like that, he has you. All the arrogance, all the superiority is gone from his voice, and what is left is just hunger and the fear that you might reject him. For a moment, you are sure you must have imagined it, but then, Astarion repeats himself.

“Please.” His hand tightens around your wrist, though he is trembling more than you are. “Just a taste, no more.”

Your lips are numb when you answer, your mind screaming at you not to let him- this is dangerous, this is stupid- you have already lost so much blood in the fight today and-

“Yes.” Your hands are on his shoulders, then in his silver hair. He smells so good; even after this horrid day. Your voice is softer than you intend for it to be, but his desperation makes you weak. “If you need it, it’s yours.”

Astarion makes a sound that shatters you, and before you can think too much about your own colossal stupidity, his fangs sink into your neck. 

It’s not painful.

It’s uncomfortable, but the fear that bites into your heart ebbs after mere seconds. Astarion’s hands are surprisingly warm against you, keeping you upright. Your head falls to the side, granting him easier access and - oh.

Why does it feel so good?

You become acutely aware of your blood flowing from the small puncture wounds in your neck, and for a moment, you panic, stiffening in Astarion’s arms.

“There, there, sweet thing.” His lips don’t raise an inch from your neck. “It’s alright, just trust me. Just a taste, all I want is a taste…”

Your head is swimming.

“You have tasted me,” you whisper, trying to pull away. When you look into Astarion’s eyes, there is a red glint in them - and a sadness that overwhelms you.

“No taste of you will ever be enough.” Astarion looks up at you from beneath long lashes. “You are divine, my love.”

The tip of his tongue wets his lips, licking up the small droplets of blood that linger.

You stare at him, trying with all your might to focus.

“You said… just a taste. No more than you need.”

His finger traces your jaw, down your neck, and your whole body is on fire.

“If it were up to me, I would need all of you,” Astarion sighs, his lips on your neck again, his tongue lapping at the blood that flows from the wound he has given you. “I would take and take, and give you so much in return. I would have you in ways you did not even know you wanted. Taste everything you have to offer.”

You shiver when he raises your wrist to his mouth, soft lips pressing to delicate skin.

“I would cherish you, keep you. My little pet, so perfect, so beautiful in every way. So eager to give what I need. Would you give me more if I asked?”

“Of course,” your lips say even though those were not the words you were planning to utter. But how could you ever say no to him? “If that’s what you need.”

Astarion’s sigh is one of rapture and delight.

“So obedient for me… You know, all these days I thought you hated me.” He chuckles to himself. “I suppose even I can be wrong sometimes.”

His teeth sink back into your neck, and the world goes dark.

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>> Next Chapter

HELLO MY DOVES i finally found time to format this for tumblr so here you go, for those who are not in love with the bear, you can get the twink, as a treat.

@deewithani @ficsbynight @kote-wan @ariadnes-red-thread @rescuethewretched @twistedstitcher27 @kakashibabe02 @writingbylee @purgetrooperfox @basilbumble @witchklng @lackofhonor @ashotofspotchka @sailor-blossom @misogirl828 @amyroswell @darkjedipoptarts @pinkiemme @sleepingsun501 @fett-djarin @samanthacookieone @tortor-mcgee @corrabell @queen--kenobi @elegantduckturtle @felinaone @palpipeen @wild-karrde @obeydontstray @nomercyforthewarrior @dream-alittlebiggerdarling @thefact0rygirl @everythingyouwanted @equalityforcats @cagrame @ladykatakuri @snakerune @shadesofshatteredblue @100lxtters @damerondala @tachyon-girl @rintheemolion @pickleprickle @mando-amando @certified-anakinfucker @baba-fett @ulchabhangorm

[hunnylagoon]

Right Where You Left Me

Pt 3: Being So Normal

Ellie Williams x Reader

Horror pushes tears from my eyes as I uncover the corpses of your past relationships. Each of them dead and lifeless as the next. Because that is what you do, you ruin what is good and it makes me miss you less and less as everyday goes by.

Premise: You and Ellie were childhood friends until you drifted apart. Funny thing about soulmates is that they tend to find their way back to each other. On this night some questionable choices lead you to a vulnerable state where you run out of options.

Warnings: Angst / reader has religious issues / drinking / smoking / drugs

Part one here!

Part two here!

Part three here!

ELLIE

It wasn't as fun as I thought to watch you fall apart.

The morning after Christmas you left before I even woke, your makeshift bed made. You gathered all of the boxes of shit I collected off your dad's lawn and took off, leaving behind nothing more than a letter thanking my dad for his hospitality. 

When I came back to Northridge a week later it was like I was looking at a new person. 

Everything that had happened was swept under the rug, you lied and told the girls that you had a great Christmas. You started picking up overtime shifts, you were out more than you were at home.

I watch you stumble through the doors at five AM, makeup smeared, hair a mess and the fakest smile I have ever borne witness to, plastered across your face. You worked the closing shift almost every night and would go partying afterwards with your shitty co-workers who enabled this type of ruination.

I saw your stories too, shot after shot, In every single picture you nurse a drink in your hand or a cigarette wedged between your fingers. When did you even start smoking?

Abby and Cat didn't know just had bad you were but Dina was catching on. I remember how she would go out with you at the beginning, in her mind it had just been harmless fun until it was a nightly occurrence she started to get concerned.

It's like you've euthanized the person you used to be.

You can't even stand to be in a quiet room so you will it with nonsense conversation, hardly even words and laugh at your own jokes.

You used to glow. Back in middle school, you glowed like a candle that smelled of pumpkins and lattes, your love felt like sinking into a warm bath, comfort and security. In high school you glowed like the moon, no one could pry their wondering eyes away from your nerve-wracking beauty, gentle and empathetic.

Though now you do not glow, you burn. You burn like the end of a cigarette, the bud fluttering to the ground just to be crushed by the heel of muddy Converse. The spark of a lighter to ignite your stale menthol cigarette, slipped from bony fingers like clumsy matchsticks to the wilderness, to set what once was beautiful aflame.

Fire is only beautiful while it burns, I knew that soon you would smother yourself out to ashes.

I've been nourishing my withering body with 50-cent packets of ramen noodles. 

I know that I'm not well, in fact, I think I've fallen off the rails.

When was the last time I got a full night of sleep? I'm not sure.

My days and nights bleed together and I can hardly differentiate the two. I hate everyone but I'm so starved for love I am searching everywhere for it, I look for it in dingy clubs and roadkill off the side of a highway, the bottom of a solo cup and the arms of one-night stands, I have even learned to lick it off silver knives. They have taken the rosery from my hand and replaced it with hard liquor.

I went out last night to forget like I do every single night. I look to the moon and pretend it is its being with thoughts and feelings, I act like I talk to it and it has said that it shines just for me.

Tonight, I will go out again. I smear glitter over my eyelids and slip into a silver sequin dress that doesn't even fall past my fingertips. I force my scabbed and bleeding feet into white stilettos that are sure to damage them even further. When I look in the mirror I feel a new sense of bitterness, like nicotine on the tip of my tongue, my face is thinning and my eyes are sunken in, dark bags hanging below the dull irisis. I cover it in concealer and bronze my face to help me look some sort of alive.

"Where are you going?" Dina asks me as I walk from my room and towards the front door, she has a tote bag packed up, her car keys in hand.

"The Monarch," I answer, it was a club on the main street, it tended to be the busiest also infamous for sketchy activity. My eyebrows furrow as I look at the tote bag in hand "Where are you going?"

"I'm going to Jesse's for the night, " She says, tonight her hair is loose and falling over her shoulders "Are you sure you wanna go out tonight?"

I nod, suddenly feeling vulnerable in my choice of clothing "Yeah," Sensing her judgement, I'm already getting defensive "I'm in college, all I do and go to work and school-

"Who's fault is that?" Dina cuts me off and my words fail me, I don't know what to say. She looks at me with disappointment glinting in her dark eyes.

My phone dings and I check the notification "My ride is here."

"Don't stay out too late."

"I won't," We both know that I am lying.

I have been many things over the years, a pirate, a cowboy, a warrior; over the past five months alone I have been a lonely girl and a saint, now I am a drunk who drowns out her worries in vodka and overly sweet cocktails.

"To being young, dumb, and broke!" Kayla raises her shot, and the rest of the group does the same. The small glasses clink together, and some of the vodka spills before we all swallow them back and slam them back onto the bar.

The central focal point was the expansive dance floor, alive with bodies moving in rhythmic unison. Multicoloured strobe lights cut through the haze, creating an otherworldly atmosphere.

The bar, a gleaming expanse of polished metal, beckoned with the promise of libations. Bartenders, clad in stylish attire, skillfully craft cocktails. The mirrored backdrop reflected the kaleidoscope of lights and the animated conversations that unfolded in this hub of social convergence.

Overhead, suspended fixtures resembling metallic sculptures add to the overstimulation.

"Welcome back," The bartender, Mitch, smiles at me, I know him by name now that I've been bouncing around from club to club almost every night. "Long Island ice tea?" He asks, to which I respond with a nod. He's memorized my drink too.

Kayla is beside me while the others have dispersed to dance or converse, she sips a dirty martini. Her beautiful copper hair is styled into loose curls, she is clad in all black, a tube top, a mini skirt and tall boots as well as a slightly oversized leather jacket thrown overtop. She looks like the definition of a cool girl.

Everyone liked her. 

"So how are things with the roommates?" She asks me, her green eyes piercing mine, she has a slight smile on her perfect lips.

"It's fine," I lied, again. I knew Dina was getting tired of taking care of me when I was too drunk to make my own way home, all of the girls that Ellie brought over hated me. I haven't been seeing much of Abby but Cat and I were actually good.

I can tell that Kayla doubts my words but she carries on to another topic "Are you ready to get fucked up tonight?"

"Yes, ma'am," I giggle. Around the curved bar, I see a woman, she's in a red top and black jeans, her hair in a mousy brown shag cut. Obviously, she caught my eye. "Do you think she's gay?"

Kayla discreetly turns to look at the woman, she turns back to me grinning "No shit."

The woman catches me staring at her and smiles at me, of course, she has perfectly straight white teeth and a pretty smile. I sheepishly smile back "Hey, Mitch?" I wait for the bartender to give me his attention "Two shots of Everclear?"

That's how the majority of my night plays out; I dance for a minute, swaying to- not really swaying, I was dancing in a way that became a hazard to those around me then return to the bar to down more drinks.

"Hey," I hear a voice beside me, it isn't one I recognize, and when I face it, I feel my heartbeat pick up. It was the woman I had been eyeing, now that she's this close I can see the freckles scattered on her face. "Do you wanna dance?"

I can't help when my face splits into a smile, "For sure," I slip off the barstool and follow her onto the dancefloor, the lights are orange and hazy or maybe the haziness is caused by my drunken state. The woman says something to me but it's drowned out by the overwhelmingly loud music "What?" 

"I'm Karris," She repeats, smiling down at me.

"Cool!" I say. I followed Karris' lead with the dancing, she had a certain confidence in her. 

I swayed with each ungraceful movement. Karris, the opposite of me is attuned to the music, moved with a confident fluidity that balanced out my careless stumbles. She laughs at my dancing "Here, I'll help you out." She shouts, trying to be heard over the Rhianna song blasting in my ears.

She comes up behind me, snaking her hands down my torso until they find a resting spot on my hips. With a firm grip, she slows me down, and now I'm moving with her, as one.

My sequin dress shimmered with every twist and move, like a mirrorball, I too might hang. As the light shifts I could've sworn I saw Ellie in the face of Karris. 

I felt the liquor hit me all at once and my body became loose, melting into Karris, I'm almost limp against her touch. She's in front of me now and my arms are hooked around her neck while her slim hands lay on her midriff. 

Her eyebrows furrow as she says something to me but once again it it lost in all of the noise, I just laugh, pretending like I heard what she was saying and hoping that it wasn't something about her dog dying.

The pop song changes into some song in French, I can't make out the words. Wait, I aced every French test in high school, I step away from Karris, squinting my eyes as I stand still in the middle of the dancefloor trying to process the lyrics.

 Je veux te voir- I need you, no, that doesn't sound right. I want to see you, that's it. 

 je veux t'avoir- I want to hold you.

I want to hold you? Is that it? When did my French get so rough? I can't even think straight.

I swear on every god I was so drunk that I forgot I was in the middle of a dancefloor, it had slipped from my mind that I was dancing with someone, and all I could think about was my French classes from high school.

Age fifteen - Grade 10

The French lesson seemed to be even more boring than usual that day. Monsieur Cargin was babbling on and on about how there could be a room full of women but if there was one male rat you would refer to them using ils instead of elles. It was the same lesson I had learned every single year in French.

It took Monsieur Cargin thirty minutes to announce the project. "Pour ce devoir, vous écrirez une lettre à un camarade de classe sur vous-même, vous pourrez inclure des informations sur votre famille, vos passe-temps, vos sujets préférés et peut-être un bon souvenir. Si vous êtes ami avec votre partenaire, vous pouvez écrire avec lui sur quelque chose que vous attendez avec impatience. La lettre fera au minimum un paragraphe, je viserais plus haut si vous voulez une bonne note." Easy enough, a letter to a classmate about your self. "Avant de demander, vous pouvez choisir vos propres partenaires."

I look right over to Ellie from across the room after he mentions choosing our own partners, she doesn't meet my gaze though, she looks as lost as ever, rifling through some papers in her binder and I'm not even sure she understood a word of what the teacher said.

Monsieur Cargin lets us begin our project, everyone gets up from their seat to search for a partner; Ellie, seeing that everyone is standing up, gets up as well. I wave her down to my desk, she crouches beside it and asks "What the fuck are we supposed to be doing?"

I explain the project to her while she hangs off my desk and nods at everything I'm saying, giving me her full attention "Do you get it now?"

"Yes." 

The next day we finished writing the letters and had to give them to each other before we turned it in, I gave Ellie my letter first.

Ellie,

Je suis heureux que nous soyons amis, non seulement parce que nos parents nous ont forcés à l'être, mais parce que tu es mon âme sœur dans chaque vie. J'aimerais te parler de moi, mais tu me connais déjà mieux que moi-même, alors je vais juste dire certaines choses que je sais sur toi. Vous avez lu chaque couverture de la bande dessinée Savage Starlight, plus d'une fois. Je sais que vous aimez faire du shopping dans la section hommes des magasins parce que vous pensez que c'est plus confortable même si vous finissez par ressembler à Adam Sandler. Vous détestez les mathématiques même si vous êtes vraiment bon dans ce domaine et vous aimez l'anglais même si vous détestez les études romanesques. Vous parlez à toute vitesse parce que vous avez tellement de choses à dire et pas assez de temps pour le dire, vous chantez comme une église avec une chorale et chaque fois que je vous vois entrer dans une pièce, je ne peux m'empêcher de sourire. J'ai hâte d'entrer à l'université, nous pouvons être colocataires et décorer la maison exactement comme nous le voulons, merci de toujours me supporter.

(Translation)

Ellie,

I'm glad that we're friends, not just because our parents forced us to be but because you are my soulmate in every single life. I would like to tell you about me, but you already know me better than I know myself so instead I will just say some things I know about you. You have read every Savage Starlight comic cover to cover, more than once. I know that you like to shop in the men's section at stores because you think it's more comfortable even if you end up looking like Adam Sandler. You hate math even though you are really good at it and you love English even though you hate novel studies. You talk at a mile a minute because you have so much to say and not enough time to say it, you sing like a church with a choir in it and every time I see you walk into a room I can't help but smile. I can't wait for college, we can be roommates and decorate the house exactly how we want it, thank you for always putting up with me.

I bent the rubric a little bit, talking about Ellie rather than myself but we were really getting graded on our French comprehension, not the subject matter of the letter. Ellie read it through, over and over, nodding her head along and pretending that it made perfect sense but I can tell by the way she squints her eyes and furrows her eyebrows that it doesn't make sense. She hand hers to me next, pride clear across her face.

Ton père est toujours en colère et je pense que c'est pour ça que nous sommes mariés. J'apprécie quand tu dors dans ma chambre et que nous nous battons avec des pistolets à eau. Mon film préféré à regarder est Star Wars, mais j'apprécie aussi Hunger Games parce que vous en êtes témoin. J'attends avec impatience une soirée cinéma ce vendredi avec vous. Tu es très cool, merci d'être mon ami.

(Translation)

Your dad is always mad and I think that is why we are married. I enjoy when you sleep at my room and we fight with guns of water. My favourite movie to watch is Star Wars but I also enjoy Hunger games because you witness it. I look forward to night movie this Friday because with you. You are very cool, thank for being my friend.

I can't help but giggle when I read it over, this causes panic in Ellie "Why are you laughing, what's wrong with it?"

"I love you but you are definitely failing."

I quickly helped her rewrite it before we turned it in, and she ended up getting a B with my revisions.

"Are you okay?" I hear Karris, she looks a little on edge, probably because I went nonverbal and froze for a solid minute or two.

"She's fine," Kayla puts her hands on either of my arms which are currently plastered to my side "I'm just gonna snag her for a minute if you don't mind." Kayla didn't wait for a response she was already dragging me away, guiding me through the sea of people and into the bathroom.

I always hated the bathroom here. The walls were black tile with white grout and there was graffiti all over the stalls and ceiling, apparently, it added to the effect, I just thought it was fugly; not to mention how dimly lit it was, there were red LED strips behind the mirrors but that was about the only light source. If you were trying to fix your eyeliner, you 

"What is going on with you?" Kayla leans against the counter with the sinks, I'm right in front of her with my arms crossed.

"Nothing-

"I just saw you glitch in real life," She raises her eyebrows "You literally froze, I thought you were having a stroke."

I wipe some sweat off my brow "My head hurts," I mutter, I've already had too much to drink and we really hadn't been there that long. My thoughts didn't seem to process. Now keep in mind that I was so insanely plastered that night that I don't remember everything verbatim, I had to take others' words for what happened.

"Do you want an aspirin?" Kayla asks to which I nod and she begins digging through her purse, she pulls out a little bottle and I hear the rattling of pills. It's so dark that I can only make out the vague shape of the bottle. She places a little pill into my hand and gives me a half-drunk bottle of Fiji water in my free hand.

I don't need the water though, I dry swallow it.

She tucks the bottle back into her purse and feels something, I see her eyes go wide and that alone begins to stress me out. "What?" I ask, with no answer. She dumps her purse onto the counter behind her and turns on her phone flash to look at each item, she snatches a bottle of Tylenol and takes the cap off just for her hand to fly over her mouth. "Is something wrong?"

"I didn't give you aspirin," She's fighting back laughter but her dainty features are etched with concern.

"So?" I say, "It's just Tylenol, it won't kill me," My speech is slurred from the alcohol in my system.

"Honey, it's not Tylenol," She lowers her hand from her mouth, pressing her lips together tight. "It's MDMA."

"What?"

"Ecstasy," She corrects herself, making it easier for me to understand.

"WHAT?" My eyes go wide and my jaw drops "WHAT?" I repeat, running over to one of the nasty graffiti-covered stalls and kneeling in front of it, sticking my fingers down my throat to try and throw up to get it out of my system before it sets in. "Say something gross to make me throw up!"

"Uhh," Kayla stood behind me "Think of your dad getting off with your grandma!"

"EW!" I shout, turning to look at her with disgust on my face. "Why would you say that?"

"You told me to say something gross!"

"Not that!" I cry, slouching against the stall. I wish I had a time machine, I wouldn't just go back four hours, I would go back four years and make sure I play everything right. Maybe then I wouldn't be drunk and high in the bathroom of a dingy nightclub and I would still have Ellie.

"It's okay, honey, It's clean," Kayla walks closer to me, the heels of her boots clacking on the tile "I promise," She offers me a little rub on the shoulder "I promise I'll take good care of you tonight and make sure you're safe."

She was lying through her teeth, and just an hour later I was face down on the bar, lulling in and out of consciousness. That is the exact moment I started to think it wasn't clean like Kayla had said. My high didn't feel like what I was told rolling was like.

At first, I felt fine and then everything started to feel off. You know when you spin around a bunch super fast and your world spins under your feet? It was like that. 

Before I retired to the bar, I tried to get back on the dancefloor just for my body to betray me and collapse onto the ground, people around me had stopped to watch me stagger back onto my feet and wordlessly stumble away.

After I lift my head off the spruce bartop and don't see Kayla anywhere in sight for the seventh time, I reach for my phone that I had stuffed into my bra and dial up Dina. 

I hear the hum of the tone before it clicks and I hear her static voice on the other end. "Hello?" Her voice crackles.

"Dina, I'm on drugs."

"What?" I hear some shuffling in the background then what sounds like the click of a door "What drugs? are you okay?"

"I don't know," My voice drags out "Kayla took it out of her purse, said it was MMA and I'm not-" I hiccup "I'm not doing well."

"What the hell is MMA? Isn't that mixed martial arts?"

"Dina, I'm not doing martial arts, I'm doing drugs."

She sighs and I can feel her disappointment through the phone "Are you still at Monarch?"

"Yes."

"Hang on," Something shifts in the background.

"I'm kind of scared."

"Please just stay where you are-

"I love you, Dina."

"I lo- CLICK

My phone dies, and the screen turns black. I click some buttons for a moment to ensure that it's dead before I tuck it back into my bra and let myself lull back onto the bar, I rest my head on my arms and look at the displays of liquor surrounding me.

I lose track of the time that passes, in my head I am just about the win the 72nd Hunger Games, it's down to me and another tribute. There's an intense fight, I wind up underneath her and she presses a blade to my throat, I get a good look at her face and see Ellie but her face doesn't stay the same. It morphs through every version of her I had ever known. When we were seven, her grunge phase, when she let me do her makeup. This is when I give up, I know I don't have it in me to kill her so I lay limp and await my fate-

"Hey," A man sits next to me, his presence stood out effortlessly. With a strong, chiselled jawline and well-defined features, his face carried an air of that old-money elegance. His hazel eyes were softened by something (alcohol, probably), drawing others into their captivating gaze. Dark, tousled hair framed his face, adding an intriguing touch of ruggedness. He is clad in a white button-up and dress pants, I can well he's a blue-collar man just from the way he sits.

"What?" I squint my eyes at him.

"You're really pretty, I thought I would introduce myself," He smiles "I'm Emmet."

"Okay," I answer turning my attention to look ahead at the liquor display, watching the way the lights shone through them. Right now I don't care to make conversation, even if he looks like Henry Cavell, I'm fighting to stay awake.

One of his bulky hands reaches for my necklace, four of his fingers are beneath the cross, pressed against it while his thumb rubs it "You're religious."

I look down where he cradles my cross and try to jerk away but my body feels too heavy "Not anymore," I mutter. I put one of my hands over his to move it off me, he takes this as an invitation to hold my hand.

Emmet brings his head next to mine to whisper in my ear "So does that mean you're a good girl or a bad girl-

"It means she's leaving, actually," Ellie pushes him away abruptly, he looks taken aback while she doesn't give a shit. She begins to gingerly help me off the stool "Do you have everything?"

"Why are you here?" I ask "I called Abby."

"You called Dina and she's on the other side of town with her boyfriend so she sent me." Ellie slings one arm around me and I sink into her immediately.

"I hate you so much," I murmur under my breath.

"Yeah, I bet you do," She is gentle with me, she's treating me like I'm made of porcelain and I'll shatter at the slightest bit of harm.

Emmet looks crazily offended, his hands up in defence "Hey, we were having a conversation-

"Borderline harassment doesn't constitute a conversation." Ellie looks like she rolled out of bed, she is in her grey sweatpants and field hockey hoodie, her hair in the low ponytail she always wore to sleep. "Are you okay?" She asks, her tone shifting from harsh to soft.

"Mhm," I ball my fist up and rub my eye, smearing my mascara when I do so, I look down at my hand and see the remnants of my telescopic mascara and silver glitter smudged on it. 

I am killing myself slowly and it is no crucifixion. 

As Ellie helps me into the back seat of her car I feel like mold is growing on my bones just to way me down to the concrete where I will surely rot. "I don't write enough," I mumble "And I'm so lonely I'm searching for god everywhere but I can't find him."

Ellie gives me a little hum of acknowledgment her eyes briefly shooting to me in the rearview mirror before looking back to the road. 

"Don't worry, I'm not in love with you anymore," I say nonchalantly as I'm sprawled out in her back seat, watching the light from neon signs pass us by.

"I didn't know you ever were." She says softly, hands on the steering wheel, she steals glances at me. The towering skyscrapers loomed like sentinels, their reflective glass surfaces capturing the myriad colours of neon signs that adorned the streets.

"I hate you," I add on. The mix of liquor and whatever drug Kayla gave me was doing me justice, I couldn't hold back any thought, they all fell from my lips in a jumbled mess. "I hope you die, I hope we both die." Ellie doesn't have anything to say to that. I think to myself that if I die in this moment, I would not be afraid, I would greet death like an old friend with a bright smile and warm hug. "I don't love anyone the way I love you," My head lulls against the window "And your girls, they all hate me."

"So which is it?" She asks, feeding into my tangent "Do you love me or do you hate me?"

"I-" I think about it for a brief moment "I hope if I killed myself everyone who was ever mean to me felt responsible." I look up slightly, using the car seats to help me steady myself "What are you doing?"

"I'm taking you home," She says, biting the inside of her cheek "What are you doing?"

"I'm waiting for god to call me back."

I ramble on and on, it's a miracle that she didn't stop at the side of the road and dump me onto a curb. The traffic lights painted the road in hues of red and green, and the city lights flickered like stars, helping us find our way home. 

"Ellie," I say, a building up ahead catches my eyes "Ellie, pull over!" She thinks I'm going to throw up so she pulls her gray sedan over, as swiftly as possible. I stumble out of the car, my stiletto heel catches the ground in a weird way, my ankle goes sideways and I fall with it.

"Shit," Ellie rushes from the driver's seat to help me sit up straight. I use her as support to pull myself off the concrete sidewalk completely and walk towards the church up ahead like a zombie "Where are you going?"

"To clean myself from sin," I approach the church and force the heavy doors open; I knew for a fact even in my state that this church had its chapel open twenty-four hours from all of the Google pins my mom sent me when I first moved here. 

The chapel's interior was bathed in a soft, ethereal moonlight that filtered through stained glass windows, casting a kaleidoscope of colours upon the polished wooden pews below. 

Smooth, cool stone formed the foundation of the chapel. The high, arched ceilings reached towards the heavens, adorned with wooden beams that seemed to cradle the sacred space below. The acoustics, shaped by the architecture, lent an echo to the moonlight whisper as if the very walls absorbed and magnified the prayers of the faithful.

Rows of meticulously arranged pews lined either side of a central aisle, leading towards the altar bathed in a soft glow. Carved with intricate detail, the altar served as the focal point, adorned with candles, floral arrangements, and sacred symbols. The air was scented with the subtle fragrance of incense, a sensory companion to the spiritual journey within.

Throughout the chapel, unlit candles are spread throughout. Above the altar, a crucifix hung solemnly, a symbol of sacrifice and redemption. Rays of moonlight seemed to converge upon it, imbuing the sacred symbol with a profound sense of grace. 

I try to compose myself the way you would a song or a speech and fall to my knees before the altar, clasping my hands together tightly. "My God, I am sorry for my sins with all my heart. In choosing to do wrong and failing to do good, I have sinned against you whom I should love above all things. I firmly intend, with your help, to do penance, to sin no more, and to avoid whatever leads me to sin. Our Savior Jesus Christ suffered and died for us. I wake young but feel as though my bones have resided on this earth for centuries."

I am at his altar but I don't feel him around me, where is his steady hand which used to guide me?

My hands grasp together even tighter "I am filthy, I'm disgusting," I choke out "I'm all used up and I need you to help me get better," I break my hands away from their position to wipe my eyes free of any oncoming tears before putting them right back "Fill me with your purity, I will be waterboarded by your sacred hand until holy water leaks from my pores."

Ellie hangs around by the entrance, sketched out by not only the creepy church but also my off-putting behaviour. She flinches at every shadow she sees, believing it to be a homeless person who was residing there for the night. I'm kneeling over in my sequin dress, one of the straps slips down my shoulder and my dress rides up, this is the most sinful I have ever been, synthetic sunshine coursing through my system.

"Make me love myself so I have room to love you," I feel so repulsive and dirty, soap and water won't make me feel clean so I'll try bleach and matches instead "I ask for Your mercy and grace to cleanse me from all unrighteousness. Create in me a clean heart, God, and renew a right spirit within me, return my family to my side."

I search for some sort of sign that he is watching over me.

Nothing.

No sign that he is here.

The priest at my old church in my hometown had said that without doubt there was no room for faith. It wasn't doubt, it was absolution, he is not here and so I unclasped my golden cross necklace and discarded it on the ground before the altar, never again will I be haunted by a man who has failed to ever show me mercy.

Ellie washes the grime off me with the detachable shower head. My hair is clipped up and I am hugging my knees, facing away from her in the bathtub. I feel a profound sense of shame and embarrassment all over again despite everything within me that is helping to take the edge off. 

She holds the shower head but looks away to give me some false sense of dignity, I cried the whole way home from the church about being filthy but with how many times I had fallen over, she didn't want me to hit my head in the shower so we settled on this.

"I'm done," I mutter and right away Ellie turns the shower off and grabs my house robe from one of the hooks on the door, she holds it up and waits for me to stand, still averting her eyes. I stand slowly, gripping onto the rim of the tub for dear life. When I slip into it, Ellie helps me move out of the bathtub and into my bedroom.

She lifts me onto the bed and tucks me in beneath my satin duvet cover. Ellie leaves for a moment but when she returns she has a bowl in case I need to vomit, a class of water, a sleeve of saltines and a bottle of actual aspirin.

"Goodnight," She begins to shut the door but I stop her.

"Ellie?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you stay with me?" My voice breaks as I say it "Just for tonight, I don't want to be alone." Wordlessly, she shuts the door and comes around the right side of my bed; Ellie is careful keep her distance from me but unlike Christmas, we face each other. "I don't hate you." I tell her because that is all I could recall saying in the car ride.

"I know."

"Do you hate me?"

"Of course not."

I don’t think I’m a whole person anymore, I think I’m made up from a dozen different perceptions of me. This version of me, born that night was anything but pure.

I am unlovely, so please, hold me gently and do not wreck me any further.

A/N: The drinking age in Canada is nineteen! They go to school in the true north strong and free. Also one more part left to go 👀

Tag list!

@elliesaturnsoftdrink @elliesaesp @melanie-watermelon @yalaysbee @laundrybag29 @readbydayana @skylerwhitwyo @lmaoo-spiderman @joliettes @kittnii @taylorgracies @sameenatruther @mikellie @belles-hell

Sorry if I missed anyone!

[aethon-recs]

23 Tomarrymort Recs for 2023 (One-Shot Edition)

Happy birthday to Tom! 🤍 Here's a round-up of some of the most interesting one-shots that I came across in 2023. I tried to include a broad range of tropes and themes and ratings, but I haven't read everything published on AO3 in the past year, so feel free to suggest any others in the comment section or in my ask box!

Criteria for this list: one- (or two-) shot, complete, published in 2023. Can be read in 1 sitting. The 2nd part of this list (23 longfics updated in 2023) coming soon. Happy reading!

*

23 Tomarrymort Recs for 2023 — One-Shots

A Deathly Visit by @purplewitch156 (E, 7k, complete)

There once was a wizard who feared Death more than anything.

a dream is a wish by @funkyatheart (E, 5k, complete)

Harry is no stranger to wet dreams. Nightmares too, of course. They mingle, and blend together in all the wrong and most alluring ways.

A Total Absence of Light by @crowcrowcrowthing (E, 8k, complete)

My name is Tom Riddle, and I am the Boy Who Lived. Something happened to turn Harry Potter into the Dark Lord, and I will do whatever it takes to learn his secrets. I don’t care that he killed my parents. I don't care that he stole my childhood. All I want is to earn the right to call myself his apprentice.

and you'll forget who i have been by @apodius (M, 3k, complete)

Tom hugs you, and for a second you relax. And then you feel a sting on your bicep through your shirt, and the world goes fuzzy.

Anniversary by @vdoshu (E, 4k, complete)

There’s a feather-light touch to Harry’s scar, one that lingers before trailing around the side of his face, coming to rest over his lower lip and tugging it slightly. Harry steels himself, then opens his eyes. “Hello, husband,” he says, facing Voldemort’s hungry gaze. “Happy anniversary.”

Apotheosis by @duplicitywrites (M, 7k, complete)

Growing up side by side with Harry Potter, beloved prophecy child, Draco learned two very important things: One, Voldemort was a god, terrifyingly monstrous and more powerful than any wizard on the planet. And two, Harry Potter was his.

Banish Me to the Garden of Eden by @contrarywiseizybel (M, 7k, complete)

Harry Potter had expected the green of the killing curse, not the red of a stunning spell. He couldn't have guessed that Voldemort would discover the truth first, and chose to trap his wayward horcrux. And in his new cage there is a very simple rule: behave and be rewarded, act out and be punished. He had been asked to die, never told to live.

Cicatrize by @noumena-writes (T, 5k, complete)

When hit with Voldemort's killing curse, Harry awakens in King's Cross. Only thing is, Dumbledore is not the one waiting for him there.

Frigid by @mrviran (E, 3k, complete)

In which one of Voldemort's Horcruxes is broken, and needs to be fixed.

Game On by penn_and_paige (T, 13k, complete)

Tom Riddle didn't pay attention to Harry Evans — that is, of course, until Evans tried to kill him.

haunt me, then by i_am_a_tree (M, 5k, complete)

"Death," Potter says, an inexplicable expression on his face that Voldemort instinctively does not like, “is quicker and easier than falling asleep."  Voldemort does not deign that statement with a reply.

Honeyguide by @cannibalinc (E, 7k, complete)

“I need an Alpha," Tom states. "Someone older. Someone already established within the Ministry with strong connections. Someone kind, a bit stupid, and rich. A Pureblood, ideally. Someone who will soften my image.”

I'm Starving, Darling (Let me put my lips to something) by @winterdeath81 (E, 1k, complete)

Harry thought for a long time he didn't like kissing until he finds that he doesn't mind doing it with Voldemort.

Insatiate by @vdoshu (E, 2k, complete)

Voldemort stole both Harry and the Philosopher’s Stone, and doomed Harry to live a half-life. That was ten years ago.

it's kind of tripping me up babe, i've got it bad for you by @limonium-anemos (E, 3k, complete)

This could've been prevented if they were paying attention, Voldemort thinks. In which they get isekai'd into a cursed erotica book.

liquid luck by @toast-ranger-to-a-stranger (E, 12k, complete)

Harry is a mermaid who happens upon sea monster Voldemort, who has nefarious plans for her.

Love, Murder, Horcrux by @moontearpensfic (E, 8k, complete)

Tom makes Harry his Horcrux on the night of their wedding anniversary.

Ouroboros by @loneamaryllis (E, 5k, complete)

Red eyes followed Harrie wherever she was, in his class, in the Great Hall, walking down the corridors, out on the grounds. She could feel the weight of his gaze upon her, like scales sliding across her skin, cold, smooth, and prickling every defensive instinct she had.

Research and Development by @cannibalinc (E, 6k, complete)

Primary Objective: Establish with certainty that Subject IS or IS NOT a living Horcrux. Captured audio sample from Subject: You can’t keep me in here forever, Voldemort! Why don’t you come in here and face me, you COWARD! I’m not scared of you! Dumbledore will find me and—

Right in Front of My Salad? by IceLynx (T, 2k, complete)

In which Draco Malfoy is dead in the kitchen, Harry is regretting moving in with his boyfriend, and Tom has never been more in love.

Plains of oblivion by @milkandmoon-ao3 (E, 3k, complete) 

Trapped in the past with no way home, a disillusioned Harry executes a plan to make an ally of the rising Dark Lord and reshape history.

That's Money, Honey by @dividawrites & @duplicitywrites (E, 10k, complete) 

Tom is a dear friend to many beautiful older women who love to treat him like their beloved son by spoiling him with presents. It is the perfect gateway to the perfect lifestyle—one full of frequent spa days, free holidays abroad, and all of the latest fashions. When Auror Harry Potter claims to be investigating Tom's 'inappropriate' relationships, Tom decides the best course of action is to instigate some 'inappropriate' behaviour of his own.

The Boy With the Green Ribbon by @meles-merrivale (T, 6k, complete)

In another world, what Sirius Black finds when he sprints into Godric’s Hollow that Halloween night is bad enough. In this world, it’s so much worse. It’s James—his best friend, his soulmate, the rest of him—dead in the doorway, and vibrant, warm Lily cold on the carpet, and there, standing in his crib seeing things no infant should see, is little baby Harry. And next to him, lying on the crib mattress, is the baby’s screaming head.

Would You Still Love Me? by @chiocchi (M, comic/artwork, WIP)

"Harry, would you still love me if I was a snake?" Harry knows how this question works. No matter how deranged and unreasonable it is, he has to say yes. A notion he may come to regret once Tom's questions start to get darker and oddly specific.

*

[mypoisonedvine]

dark!capa who hasn’t felt the touch of a woman the entire time he’s been on icarus II😵‍💫😵‍💫

oh I've been thinking about this since I saw the movie no joke

warnings: DARK SMUT 18+ ONLY, soft!dark/yandere vibes, touch-starved reader (and capa lol), forced creampie

"Please, please, don't fight me," he begged in a soft voice, still pinning you to the cold glass wall with his weight.

But what else were you supposed to do? After working side by side with him for years, even growing to consider him a friend, he'd found you in your room, gone on a bizarre rant about how long the mission was (as if that was some kind of surprise?) and then grabbed you. By the time you realized what was happening, it was far too late to try to talk him out of it, or at least try to make a run for the door.

"I just need--" he choked out, speaking softly by your ear as his hands ran over your body, "I just need to... feel something. Something real."

"Capa, please," you sighed, struggling to keep your composure as he started to attempt to undress you, a heavy sigh falling from his lips. "I know as much as anyone how hard it's been, okay?"

"Then you need this too," he breathed as he pulled your tank top out of the way and ran his fingers softly over your bare shoulder. "I can make it good for you-- I mean, I can try. Kinda rusty, you know..."

"Just please," you whimpered, "stop now-- I won't tell anyone. We can just forget it, go back to... to how things were!"

He shook his head, making you whine as he pressed himself harder against you, kissing the curve of your neck as his long hair tickled your skin. "I can't take it anymore," he explained, "being so close to you, seeing you every day and never getting a chance to touch you... I'm sorry, we can't go back to how it was. It was killing me."

Just as you opened your mouth to protest, or at least ask how long he'd been harboring this secret obsession, his lips ghosted over your pulse and you shuddered. Feeling him smile, you cursed yourself internally for how easily your body responded. He wasn't wrong that it was difficult to spend years without any human contact-- but you strongly disagreed with his solution.

He reached down into your shorts suddenly, making you gasp in shock. "You're wet," he noticed with a purr.

Okay, maybe you didn't disagree that strongly... or at least, your body didn't. But your mind was racing with confusion and fear, realizing how much worse this was going to get: tonight was only one problem. You still had years left on this ship, trapped with him, working in the lab right by him every day... he was completely inescapable.

You whimpered and tried to push him away again, but he shushed you and started to push his own pants down, pushing you roughly back against the wall when you resisted. "Shh, hey," he hissed, sliding your shorts down and guiding his erection to your opening, "it won't be so bad. I just need this-- I'm sorry, I know you... I know you trusted me. But I need this. I need to be inside you."

Pushing in with a loud moan, his hips forced yours against the wall-- until a hand settled on your hips and pulled them back; he looked down at where he entered you, groaning and sighing as he already started to move.

"S'been so long," he mumbled, "s-so warm..."

"Stop," you choked out, "please--"

"I can't stop," he whimpered, burying his face in your neck again and kissing you more hungrily there. "I'm sorry, I can't stop-- you feel too good. Fuck. Like you were made for me."

Moving faster, he kissed away your tears, still offering apologies sometimes between his deep and desperate moans. For a while, you let it happen-- because you didn't have much of a choice in it all-- until his sounds got louder and his movements more erratic. Erratic enough that you could hear skin hitting skin, and his dogtags dangling.

"I'm close," he panted in your ear, "fuck, I need to fill you."

"N-no, Capa," you choked out, "not inside..."

He didn't say anything, but just the way he groaned and dropped his forehead on your shoulder somehow made it obvious to you that he wasn't going to heed your demand.

"Pull out!" you insisted. "Do you have any fucking idea what would happen if I got--?!"

"I know, I know," he grunted, "but fuck, I-- I can't stop now."

You managed to get your arms out from against the wall and push back on his hips, trying to force him out, but he grabbed your wrists and groaned as he pinned them to the wall, fucking you harder than ever as you sobbed.

"Sorry," he offered one more time, "I need it. I need to fucking fill you up--"

"Please, please," you whimpered.

"--give you every fucking drop of my come," he growled, "so fucking deep inside--"

You shook your head, because you knew it was already a lost cause.

"You're gonna take it so well, I know you will," he praised darkly, "gonna be fucking perfect for me. Just stay still-- please, baby, it's almost over..."

But this was far, far from over.

[ohisms]

↪ 𝑫𝑶𝑵'𝑻 𝑺𝑴𝑰𝑳𝑬 𝑨𝑻 𝑴𝑬 . ( a collection of lyric starters from an assortment of billie eilish songs . adjust phrasing as necessary . )

you scared me to death .

there's nothing left to save now .

i don't think i caught your name .

i like it when you take control .

you're sacred and they're starved .

how dare you ? and how could you ?

one of us is gonna lose .

i don't even really know how it happened .

i'm out of sympathy for you .

just let me hold you .

don't talk about me like you might know how i feel .

try not to abuse your power .

i wish someone had told me i'd be doing this by myself .

it's not like me to be so mean .

you just want what you can't have .

would you like me to be quiet ?

i haven't slept since sunday .

i don't want to want you .

it hurts , but i know how to hide it .

i'm the only one who does it how you like .

you better keep your head down .

a lot can change in twenty seconds .

why aren't you scared of me ?

i thought that i was special .

you're looking at me like i'm see-through .

you were a hero , you played the part .

i never really know how to please you .

see what you wanna see .

gold's fake , and real love hurts .

no way , i'll call the cops .

maybe you should leave before i get too mean .

i just wanted to protect you .

you only listen to your fuckin' friends .

they're never gonna give you love like ours .

all you wanna do is kiss me .

don't you know too much already ?

it's weird that we care so much until we don't .

i didn't change my number , i changed who i reply to .

i don't know what feels true .

did you really think this is the right thing to do ?

i would hate to see you go .

i'd never treat me this shitty .

i'll only hurt you if you let me .

you made me feel like it was my fault .

now i know what you are .

i feel more and more like i was made for you .

you wanna kill me ? you wanna hurt me ?

don't try to make me feel bad .

wait , you know what ? maybe just forget it .

was i made from a broken mold ?

you want me to be yours , then you've gotta be mine .

tell me "nothing lasts" , like i don't know .

wait a minute , let me finish .

you know i'm not your friend without some greenery .

my demands aren't high to make .

stop , what the hell are you talking about ?

we both know i'm worth waiting for .

you ruined everything good .

you really know how to make me cry .

your love feels so fake .

i wanna be alone . alone with you , does that make sense ?

spit it out , what is it exactly ?

i'll never let you go .

if we were meant to be , we would've been by now .

you can pretend that you don't miss me .

just fucking leave me alone .

don't say i didn't warn you .

it's pretty cool , right ?

i think i might have fallen in love .

i tried not to upset you .

do you even feel anything ?

don't ask questions , you don't wanna know .

i've been walking through a world gone blind .

i just wanna make you feel okay .

i know you don't care , but can you listen ?

don't you know i'm no good for you ?

[starlight-writer]

Randomly Cuddling Them

A/n: Hahaha hiiii (⁠；⁠^⁠ω⁠^⁠）it's meeeee I'm baaaaack In all seriousness, I've been dealing with a shit ton of stuff and summer depression is kicking my ass. I'm sorry I haven't posted in ages even when I promised I would, I just haven't been able to motivate myself to write. I won't promise you guys a schedule or another fic anytime soon, but I will say that I have no intentions of deleting this blog or stopping writing all together. Just be patient with me and to those who have requested things, I'm sorry I haven't answered them. They'll all come in due time :) In the meantime, have some fluff to make you forget about your depression.

Warnings: none, fluff, slight angst(?)

Gn Reader Masterlist

Steven

Welcomes the cuddle with open arms

He'll ask if you’re ok a few times, just wanting to make sure his darling is feeling well

He'll pet your hair and start talking about his day or a new book he's read to fill the silence

"You wouldn't believe the ending though! The main character has to sacrifice his "

Just sort of talks about anything to fill the comfortable silence, hoping it'll distract you from anything that's stressing you out

Definitely playfully brags to Jake and Marc in the headspace during and after the cuddles

"They wanted to cuddle with me :D"

Once you're ready to pull away, he'll give you a kiss on the forehead and continue reading or whatever it was before, but keeps an eye on you

He isn't sure what brought on the cuddles, and while he loves them, he wants to make sure you're ok

If you start looking upset or frustrated with a task, he'll gently pull you away from whatever you're doing and sit you on the couch

"Lovey, you can finish it later, just sit with me for a bit yeah?"

He'll pull you into his chest and read aloud from his book or ramble about something to distract you

He'll play with your fingers, interlacing them and kissing your finger tips before holding your hand to his face

"Love you, darling"

He'll say in the sweetest voice, you'll forget all about the stresses of the day or the stresses of tomorrow

Mission accomplished

Marc

He's a little caught off guard, but pulls you into his arms eagerly

He'll never turn down cuddles (cough touch starved cough)

He'll run his fingers through your hair or rub his hand up and down your back

He'll ask if you're ok, but won't push past that

He'll stay silent unless you ask him to talk

"Uh... I saw a lizard earlier today. It reminded me of you cause it was cute :)"

He's trying his best

If you stay in his arms for a long period of time, he'll start to think something might be wrong so he'll start making really really bad jokes

"I went to the deli earlier and the sausage they gave me was the wurst :D"

He won't stop until you laugh and he's not above tickling you until you pee your pants

It's like he unlocks a little box inside his head of terrible jokes and playfulness just for the purpose of seeing you smile

After the cuddles session, he'll watch over you carefully

If you start looking stressed or tired or anything but relaxed, he'll pop off with another joke

"Ya know, babe, I used to hate facial hair. But then it grew on me."

Is that a frown on your perfect lips? Not on his watch

"I don't think I told you this before, but I used to be able to play piano by ear. Now I have to play it with my hands."

Eventually, if you start looking too stressed, he'll just pull you into another cuddle session

"Can't have my baby getting stressed."

He'll explain, kissing you on the forehead and shushing you if you try to leave

He'll carry you to bed or the couch, locking you underneath him with his head on your chest

"So comfy, might just fall asleep here."

He snores loudly, trying to coax a giggle or two out of you

And when you fall asleep from the warmth he gives off, he'll watch you with love in his eyes

"Goodnight, babe. I love you."

Jake

There're two ways this could go depending on how he feels

He could be very smug about it, hold you tightly to his chest, mutter things like 'poor bebito/a, so needy for their Papi~' and make sexual or teasing jokes to lighten the mood

Or he could hold you securely in his arms, run his fingers across your back, occasionally kiss your head, and ask in a hushed voice 'what's wrong, mi amor?'

He thrives on physical affection, so either way he's incredibly happy to give it to you

Whether it be a quick kiss, setting his hand on the small of your back as he walks by, resting his hand on your thigh as he drives, or just touching your knee with his in a crowded space, he loves all of it

And depending on why you suddenly held onto him, he'll be very attentive

If he's making jokes when you just want to be held, he'll pick up in it right away and mutter a small apology with a kiss

He'll hum a song he heard on the radio, he'll keep his breathing long and slow to help calm you down if needed, he'll even read you one of Steven's 'boring' books

He's like Marc in a way, they'll both do absolutely everything in their power to make you smile or laugh if the situation calls for it

If you've gotten your fill of cuddles and start to pull away, he'll pout and pull you back down, muttering something about feeling cold without you on top of him

Which is a lie, they run extremely hot which has cancelled many cuddle sessions in the summer because 'It's too hot, Jake! And don't give me those puppy eyes!'

He refuses to let you go until you explicitly tell him you want him to

He'll act all sad, but he lets you go after a passionate kiss

Openly watches you closely afterwards, determined to see any slip of annoyance or frustration so he can whisk you away to your shared room and cuddle the stress away

And the second your brow twitches in frustration, he's coming up behind you and hugging you

"Bebito/a, dance with me."

He'll say, already swaying to the music playing in his head

He'll spin you around and subtly drag you away from the chore or work you were doing with a charming smile and his swaying hips

When you've rested your head on his chest and sigh softly, following the shuffling of his feet and sway of his hips, he knows he's succeeded in calming you down

[nyrasbloodyclover]

hypnotic (kai anderson x reader)

cw: breeding kink, eating disorder (it's really really bad), mommy issues, mentions of suicide, parental abuse, cults, kai is his own warning really, murder, overstimulation

a/n: if you're not into this pleaseeeee leaveeeeee i don't want tumblr to delete my blog again. also you can read this fic on ao3 if you'd like, link is in my pinned post. and if, by any chance, you relate to this i am so sorry.

What I wanted right now, was to get out of my house, go anywhere, just so I could stop listening to constant fighting and screaming from my parents. I couldn't bear it anymore. I had one year until college but it seemed impossible to survive that long. 

"Oh, look who locked herself in her room!" My mother bursted in and a pit started forming in my stomach. I didn't move. "When are you going to start being useful? You're in here all the time, you could start paying rent." 

Now, what was I supposed to say to that? If I told her that the reason I spent all my time in my room was because they wouldn't stop screaming at each other and I would just be their punching bag, she wouldn't listen and the situation would only get worse.

"Or maybe it's time for you to find a job. Now you're just living like a parasite." I stared. My mother was a very complex character. I think she would be capable of pulling Gone Girl on us. She has the mentality. Just saying.

My father on the other hand, he's weak. Or she made him weak. I don't remember the last time he stood up for himself. He's tired, I can see that clearly. I just wish they would get a divorce. It's so draining to wake up everyday and live in fear that your every move is going to be a mistake, something to criticize. 

I don't remember the last time I felt truly at peace, but I could afford myself distractions. That's how I ended up scrolling through Tumblr 12 hours per day and forgetting to eat because the skinny girls I came across were just so pretty. Food was my enemy. We couldn't stand each other. And the guilt simply because of eating was the worst feeling ever.

Empty is pretty. And I wanted to look pretty, so I starved. It was my sport. It still is. The joy of seeing my hipbones and ribs after some time was indescribable. I loved to lay awake at night and touch my bones, feel them as I tried to fall asleep. Of course, there were many times when I just couldn't take it anymore and I binged. I would regret it immediately and restrict even more.

"Alright. I'll find a job." I stared at her with empty eyes. I was dizzy, almost like I got drunk. She exited the room and slammed the doors behing her. I think I'm never going to fully understand her.

I stared at my ceiling, having no energy to move, even though I had unfinished assignments hanging above my head, screaming at me to do them, but I just wanted to sleep. School can wait. I think my red lipstick was smudged, but I had no energy to take it off. My hair was a mess, too. I tried to straighten it but my natural waves were too stubborn. I fell asleep.

A week passed. My life stayed the same except for my new job at the restaurant—The Butchery On Main.

The two sweet women who own it were kind enough to let me work even though they don't employ people under eighteen. I worked mostly after my school, until the closing. I didn't mind since I got to leave the house and get a break from my parents. 

People were nice, I took their orders, served their food. The restuarant was mostly empty during my shifts, but nonetheless it was almost hard, working with food. All those calories around me made me want to puke. And I wasn't much of a puker. I had the urge to binge. It was disgusting. But I wasn't going to throw all my work out of the window just like that. 

I had my diet coke and if I got hungry Ivy said that I could eat whatever I wanted, and I wanted cucumber. With pepper. They had those.

Today, I had much free time so I was just sitting at one of the tables and doing my homework while scrolling through Tumblr and eating freshly peeled cucumber with some seasoning on top. I was thriving. I was almost happy. It seemed impossible.

The door opened. A man walked in. He was dressed in black from head to toe and what stood out the most was his blue hair with grown out roots. He walked like he owned the building and everyone in it. I immediately stood up, while he was pulling out his chair, fixing my uniform. I let him read through the menu for a couple of seconds and then decided to approach.

"What would you like to order?" I smiled. I was nice. I am always nice. Why hasn't he looked at me yet? Why is he ignoring my presence? His head was bowed down until he raised it and I was met with black pools that stared at me, or rather through me. I felt dizzy and it wasn't the diet.

"Surprise me," he cocked his head, "I would love to see what you liberals like to eat the most. Maybe it'll make me change my political views."

"Al..right," I dragged on, "Is that all?"

"Yes," he replied.

"Everything will be done in a minute." I wanted to get away from him, as soon as possible. He was probably some Trump obsessed republican who's most likely to tell me to make him a sandwich. Which I am practically doing right now. But I couldn't deny it - He had a beautiful face. I wouldn't consider him that attractive if it weren't for his dead, piercing eyes that silently commanded you to obey every one of his rules. 

The food was ready. I had a feeling I would fall on my face next time I locked my eyes with his, which wasn't good. I didn't even know his name! Rachel, one of the cooks, handed me the best steak they had, house's special, "Who is it for?"

I didn't dare look at him. "The one with the blue hair. Just please don't stare. He's creeping me out."

Her eyes went wide, "That's Kai Anderson."

I looked at her blandly. The name didn't mean anything to me.

"You seriously need to watch more television."

"I'm fine, thanks. And if he's some menatlly deranged politician, then I'm not really missing out."

All the politics drained me, and don't get me wrong, I loved to be informed, but when I had to argue with someone about basic human rights, I'd rather not know anything.

I walked over to his table, and put the food on it. "I hope you're not vegan. Either way, enjoy your food." I kept my eyes everywhere, just not on him. He was so unsettling. I had to get away.

"I certainly will," he said and I walked away without a second glance. Jesus Christ, his mere presence was intense.

My shift ended in half an hour and that's when the restaurant was supposed to close. Ivy left early because of some family emergency, so she asked me to close and lock everything for her. I changed into my regular clothes—denim skirt and a white button down with my favorite black sweater, docs and a pair of knee socks. I untangled my hair and tried to brush it out with my fingers.

The tables were empty. Well, mostly. So-called Kai Anderson was still here, not even eating, just looking at some papers and flipping them over, for a while now.

I needed some extra balls to approach him and ask him to leave. Why did I accept to be the last one here? I could've been home by now, sleeping or watching a sitcom, but instead I'm stuck in this building with the strangest and the scariest man I've ever met. But then again, If I were home, my mother would be screaming at me. So I guess it's a win? Also I had to thank Kai for occupying my mind and not letting me think about food. I seriously needed to go to bed before I ended up eating something. Or worse- binging. I think I had less than 200 calories today which is a sign that I am slowly approaching danger zone. It isn't a diet anymore. I can't eat normally. I thought I could go back, but I guess my body won't let me. Or was it my mind?

"Miss?" Someone waved before my eyes.

"Yes? Sorry." Kai was standing beside the table that I occupied. 

"Are you closing soon?"

Should I lie? But then again, he isn't stupid. "Yes. Do you want to pay?"

"Oh no. I already did. I just wondered what occupied your mind that much." He had no idea.

"Nothing much. Just tired I guess. Can't seem to balance school and work."

"Ah. You see," he sat across me, "I don't believe you."

"Okay? I didn't try to be persuasive."

He smirked. Dear God, why was he so creepy but so hot at the same time?

"I still want to know what made you zone out for that long." Has he been staring at me the whole time?

"That's creepy. I don't even know you."

"What's that got to do with anything? I just asked you to tell me what's been botherung you. You looked fucking stressed."

"It really doesn't matter." I just wanted him to leave. 

"Wait. Here, I'll give you..." he reached into his  back pocket, "Fifty bucks if you tell me."

My lips curved. Come on, you can't blame me. Extra cash at my age isn't something you just don't accept.

"Ah! I knew it," he smiled, "Come on, doll, speak."

"It isn't anything interesting. My mom is just being a bitch, nothing unusual." I gave him the least I could and snatched the cash from his hand.

"She isn't letting you sleep over at your boyfriend's or something?" He laughed like I had the dumbest reason for not liking my mother.

"Not really. She just...Wants too much, I guess? And I'm not able to give her that." It felt weird saying that out loud. I think I never said it.

He stared at me for a second.

"I want to show you a trick." He put his right hand on the table. "Don't worry. It's something me and my older brother always used to do when we were little."

He reached with his pinky finger over to my hand. We locked fingers like we were making a pinky promise. 

"This is weird. And please hurry. My shift ends in fifteen minutes." 

"We have enough time. Okay, listen. Pinky power. Once the skin contact is made, no lies can be told and whatever we say, stays between us," he narrowed his black eyes, "Trust me, if you lie, I will know. Ready?"

When did I agree to this? Well, fuck it, I'll do it anyway.

"Do you love your family?" He asked, his expression serious.

"Yes." His mouth twitched.

"Do you like your family?"

"Absolutely not." I shook my head.

"Why is that?" 

How do I explain this to him without sounding like a total maniac? "My father is weak, he doesn't know how to stand up for himself. And my mother screams at me for merely existing. Her favorite hobby is emotionally draining me, then pulling my hair or slapping me because she feels like it. She regrets having me. I think she wants me to kill myself. It would be easier to have a dead daughter." My mind went blank. I felt nothing in that moment. Whatever he asked, I was going to tell him.

"Did you ever try to kill yourself?," he asked with a flat voice.

I thought for a second. Should I tell him the whole truth? He said he's going to know if I lie, but that doesn't mean...

"Don't think too much." His eyes went dark while I was literally choking under pressure of his gaze.

"No. I was never suicidal. I like living. But I..." words were stuck in my throat, "I...Sometimes, she would starve me. Saying I didn't deserve it. I had no money to buy something to eat. So I made a game out of it. I developed a disorder. It was the only thing I had some control over. I started it out of spite, but now it's real. It's worse than ever. But I don't want to stop."

His expression never changed. Not once. "Do you hate your mother for that?"

"You have no idea."

"I think I do have some idea about hating one of your parents. So, from experience, I need to ask you one more question."

I nodded. "Have you ever dreamt about killing her?"

I wanted to pull back from him, but his hand wouldn't let me. He pulled me even closer. "We can't break the contact," he gritted through his teeth.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry," I exhaled, "Yes. And no."

"Elaborate." 

The restuarant was silent. I couldn't even hear the sound of cars outside. Lights were practically out. 

"I...I wanted her dead. But I don't think I would be able to do it. I had a," I inhaled, "A fantasy about someone killing her while I watched. It's so fucked up, but I just couldn't help it. It brought me relief that she was gone and someone cared enough to get rid of her for me." 

I was scared to look at him. He was going to call the mental ward and lock me there. I was fucked. Why did I tell him all of that? 

I looked up.

He was smiling. It wasn't a sympathetic smile, or a sad smile, or anything similar to that. He was grinning like a maniac. He released my hand and I realized my eyes were filled with tears. I blinked them away. 

He shook his head with closed eyes, "You're perfect. Perfect."

My voice was low, weak. "What? How could you think that after what I just told you?"

"Don't ask too many questions. I have a solution for you because I know you're destined for greater things. Tell me, do you wish to never be under your mother's thumb again?"

"I mean, yes? That's going to be when I turn eighteen, so I have to be patient."

He laughed. "Oh, no, baby, no. She's never going to let you go. She'll suffocate you until there is nothing left but a shell. No matter the age or what the law says, you'll always be controlled. While she's alive, at least."

"What are you saying?"

"Do you want my help? Do you wish to be finally free?"

This was so fucked up. I never met this man in my life. Why was he offering me help?

"What's in it for you?"

He cocked his head, "I get to keep you by my side."

My mouth was dry. I was scared, but...excited. Thrill rushed down my body as this psychopath was staring at me, offering me a sick escape. I was supposed to say no. I was supposed to save my soul.

"Yes."

"Yes, what?"

"I want your help."

He looked so happy, it made me happy.

"Good. Then, we're leaving now." I was hypnotized by him. I just nodded, not asking where or why, my mother taught me I shouldn't get in the cars with strangers, especially men, but my mother was also the reason for many of my problems. I'll do something that'll piss her off.

I got into Kai's car and shut the door. I was okay with the fact that he might end up killing me.

He said nothing for the most of the ride, but I noticed him glancing over at my skirt that rose up to my thighs. I didn't bother pulling it down. I mean, I wore mini skirts for a reason, right?

I pretended not to notice as I looked at my reflection in the closed window. Hollow cheeks, red lipstick, pale face. I was obsessed. I always wanted to look like a corpse with make up. My face was perfect, lipstick untouched, mascara a little smudged, dark circles under my eyes from sleepless nights. 

"You know you could eat a burger." I looked at him. I almost wanted to hug him. His words made me feel proud, like I achieved something big. And I guess I did.

"Really? Do you know that you're the first person ever to tell me that?" I felt weird happiness in my chest. 

"Well, yeah. Why do you look so surprised? I didn't mean it as a compliment. You have a problem. I'm not even sure it's supposed to be a compliment." He frowned, not taking his eyes off the road.

"It doesn't matter if it's supposed to be a compliment or not. Thank you for saying it." I didn't give two fucks if he thought I was some anorexic lunatic that needed years of therapy. I was happy. And he wasn't my parent or my guardian to tell me what to do.

"Just think about it. What's the point of being so skinny? It's not even attractive."

"The point is in being clean. I don't want to see a pound of fat on my body. It's disgusting. And I am to do with my body as I please. I don't give a fuck if someone likes to eat like a fucking pig because It's not my body, and certainly not my problem." I was so angry. Who the fuck he thought he was?

"Just saying. You look sick. And I mean really, really sick."

"I am aware. Like I'm also aware that I'm fucked in the head. And that's the reason for all of this," I gestured over my figure. 

I could feel his anger. He didn't like that I disagreed with him and stood up for myself, even if I was wrong.

"We're here." He suddenly said, getting out of the car. I followed him into the house I guessed was his. The whole neighborhood was silent. Lights were off everywhere. 

We got into his house and I didn't even got to see it clearly because he practically dragged me into his basement and started changing. He put on a black leather coat while looking for something. His phone? He called someone.

"I'm expecting you'll be here in five? Well don't try to make up excuses. This is a perfect opportunity. I don't care— No, drag yourself and your pathetic wife here." He called two more people and I just stood in the middle of the room staring at him. 

"What's your adress?" Was he really doing that now? "You know what, never mind. I found it." I wasn't going to ask him how. He looked like the person who instead of Instagram browsed dark web. 

"Okay, let's go. They're here." I had to ask him because he said nothing about it. I had to be sure.

"Why are we going to my house?"

Beat. A moment. "To kill your mother, of course."

There were other people with us, but I couldn't see their faces because of the creepy clown masks. Kai had one too. I felt like I was drugged. I didn't know what happened to me. I suppose I had enough. I know Kai is not the answer for my problems, at least not all of them. He's going to get rid of her and then what? No. Stop thinking. 

I listened to my brain this time. It was late. My parents were probably asleep. Probably in separate beds. It's going to be easier for Kai and the others to do the job. They kept their mouths shut and I didn't blame them. I still wasn't sure if I was part of this sick cult or whatever it was. I read enough about them to recognize a cult leader when I see one. 

The car suddenly stopped. We were in front of my house.

"This played out so good, little lamb. I knew you were perfect." Kai's voice was muffled under that mask and his words made my heart flutter. He was so sick. "Don't just stand there, baby. Be a good host. Invite us in. Come on," he gestured with one gloved hand towards my house. I felt everyone's eyes on me as I turned my back and started walking towards the door. What did he mean by this playing out good? Did he plan this before? It certainly did not matter.

We got in, doors creaking, but not enough to wake anyone up. My father was downstairs, in the guestroom, but my Satanic mother was in their bedroom. I went first, up the stairs, one by one, they followed me, Kai first, then the rest of them. 

I showed them the doors. 

Kai got in and they followed him. I shut the door behind me. I felt like I was seeing things through someone else's eyes. I didn't feel guilt and I wasn't regretting my decision. I remember everything through a coat of blur. Knives, a lot of them. They killed her in her sleep. Stabbed her too many times, I lost count. Sheets were soaked with red and the room started smelling like iron too. Kai used her blood to draw some sign on the wall that was facing the bed. It looked like a smiley face, but I wasn't sure. The job was done. I was free. I was free of any charges, since I wasn't home when it happened. I was going to sleep in my bed and wake up in the morning, shocked, petrified, screaming for help, calling the police, my father is going to be terrified too, but relieved. He would never admit it thought. 

We were in the car again. Then in front of Kai's house. "Leave. I want some time alone with our newest member."

"Kai, no. You can't drag her into this. She's just a child—" A feminine voice scorned him under her mask.

"Don't tell me what to do, Winter. Now leave," he raised his voice and I flinched. "We have much to talk about." He took off his mask and smiled knowingly at me. I wasn't scared of him anymore, though I knew I should be. He killed my mother for Christ's sake! 

We went into his basement again. The lights were already on and I watched him as he took off his mask and black coat. His shirt was soaked with my mother's blood. 

"What did you want to talk about?" I cocked my head.

"You were so good. I knew you could do it. Next time, maybe you'll even be the one holding the knife. You didn't even flinch!" He paced through the room and laughed, like he was talking to himself.

"You didn't do this for me, did you?"

He stopped, then looked at me, "I already told you. This played out perfectly. And I've been watching for quite some time now," his eyes darkened "When I found out that the woman who's been talking shit about me over her social media had a daughter, I had to see if she was as bitchy as her mother." Oh, so he did this to save his reputation. Of course.

"And," I swallowed, "Is she?"

He didn't answer me. Instead he marched to the other side of the room and pushed me against the wall, slamming his lips on mine. I was out of breath, not being able to process everything. Oh my god, he was kissing me! This insane, sick in the head, narcissistic, 30-something, psychopath was kissing me and I opened my mouth to him like the whore I was. I wanted him to touch me. No, I needed his blood stained hands on me right now. 

I pulled one of his hands and put it on my chest as his tongue continued to explore my mouth. He took off my sweater and shirt. I was left in a black bra and skirt.

"Aren't you scared of being arrested for fucking a minor?"

"I commited far more monstrous crimes than fucking a seventeen year old and you know it, " he breathed into my mouth. Red lipstick was smudged over his lips. His hand that was on my chest slipped under my skirt and found my panties. 

"You know it," his fingers entered me with ease, "And yet, you're still so fucking wet for me." My mouth fell open as he buried his fingers deeper if that was even possible. I wasn't a virgin, but then again, I've never been with a man. I took my own virginity so that I didn't have to bother. 

"Kai—" I breathed. I needed more.

He sat on one of the chairs beside the circular table and pulled me onto his lap, his thigh between my legs. My clit was aching for some king of friction so I started rubbing myself against the rough fabric of his jeans. 

"Aren't you desperate?" He pushed me on the floor, between his legs, he pulled out his belt and unzipped his pants. His intentions were clear and I was happy to oblige, but I had to touch myself or I'd go insane. I started stroking his already hard dick and rubbing my clit at the same time. 

He noticed. And he wasn't happy about it. "I thought you were going to be patient. But I guess not." He took his belt and with one move he tied my hands behind my back while I was still kneeling in front of him.

"Please, I just need to—"

"Yes, yes, I know, but you have to deserve it. Am I right?"

I nodded hesitantly and he scooped up my hair in his fist and used it to pull my head down. I took him into my mouth as the wetness and ache grew between my legs. 

Kai continued to pull my head down until his tip hit the back of my throat and I gagged. He chuckled.

My eyes teared up as I sucked his dick like my life depended on it.

He grunted and raised his hips, so I knew he was close. And I knew he was going to either come in my mouth or...

He pulled out and finished on my tits, painting my chest with his cum. 

"You were so good," he said with his head tilted back and eyes closed. He let my hair fall down my back and over my face. Kai dressed and got up, then pulled me with him, still tied.

He slammed me on the desk and I was able to just lay there and let him do whatever he wanted to me. Not that I minded.

"I feel like I'm going to break you," he said as he traced my very visible ribs with the tips of his fingers. "Break every bone in your body." 

I could feel my stomach sinking in and his words made me even a bigger mess than I already was. "Do it, please, please," I cried out as my hips rose towards him. 

"Since you asked so nicely...And the skirt stays on. Do you know how much willpower it took me not to bury my hand under your skirt and make you beg for more while we were driving?" He pulled my skirt up and didn't even bother to take off the panties, he just ripped them. He towered over me as I layed on his table, feeling the cool air on my swollen clit. 

Kai's fingers went over my aching pussy and my back arched towards his touch. He did nothing for a split second and then came the first slap. I yelped as the burning spread between my legs, but I didn't tell him to stop. He slapped me even harder and I cried out, most ungodly sounds coming from my mouth.

"Don't worry, you can scream as loud as you'd like."

He slapped my dripping cunt once more and after that I was sure I was going to feel his hands on me days after. He didn't wait for me to recover from his brutality, instead he buried two fingers inside me and started scissoring, wanting to spread me even wider. I threw my head back as he added one more. He buried them knuckle deep inside me and began curling them.

"I feel like you're a big girl. You can take one more." He didn't wait for my agreement. His four fingers were inside, making my pussy burn with pleasure. I wasn't able to form words. He spat on me and started massaging my clit while almost his whole hand was thrusting in and out of me. I felt pressure deep in my lower stomach and started panting and moaning for him to continue, but he did exactly the opposite. 

My cunt was left empty without his fingers and I could almost cry. I just needed a bit more.

"Don't look so upset. I'm not finished with you." 

Kai untied me and took his belt. He spread my legs as wide as he could and started spanking my pussy with it. I screamed more in pain than surprise, "Kai, no, stop, please stop-"

The pain was unbearable, but it was just enough  for my clit to start pulsing more and that pressure in my belly to grow. I screamed in pain as he continued to hit me with no mercy. I could feel my walls clenching and my back arched as I came undone. Orgasm hit me and I came down from my high, but Kai didn't stop. 

He started rubbing my abused cunt, overstimulating it. He was deaf to my begging and crying. It was too much. There was no pleasure anymore, just pure pain, but he continued to massage it and after a couple of minutes I was shaking with another orgasm. I knew I was too sensitive, but when I tried to close my legs, he stopped me. Then I noticed his rock hard dick under his jeans and my heart dropped. I was going to pass out. He was going to use me, not caring for my pleasure anymore.

"Just hold still a little more, doll." He pulled his dick out and slammed himself inside me, making my eyes roll to the back of my head. Everything hurt, but he didn't care. His thrusts were fast and rough, I couldn't keep up. I could feel his orgasm building and he had no intention of pulling out. Kai continued to slam into me until he reached his peak. He filled me with his seed and when he finally pulled out I could feel it dripping from my pussy.

Kai helped me get up and as he was untying his belt, his hot breath was on my neck. "Welcome to the cult, baby."

[enam3l]

Hi Mona!

I love your rockstar!eddie series!

I know request for him are closed for now, but when you decide to open up request again, I wanted to leave this here so that I won't forget.

Rockstar!Eddie coming back home after touring and he's so touch starved and deprived of you. So, when he comes home he ravishes you. He catches himself asking you if he's too rough and you're thinking he's NOT rough ENOUGH because you're just as deprived of him.

I hope have a winter/December and a great new year!

thank you angel! and you know what? because you've all enjoyed our rockstar eddie christmas request week, i'll give you guys one last fic. don't worry if i didn't answer yours. i will do them all i either A. just didn't get round to it or B. want to do it at a certain point cos i need to cover some other plots first

three fucking weeks (rockstar eddie x reader) 3.6k / mega smut from start to finish / fluff

this is for everyone who got involved in the xmas request week because of that, i've hit 700 followers. so here is my biggest smut fic yet before rockstar eddie goes on hiatus for a couple of weeks. this one ends on a cliffhanger! but you might want to refer to here to work it out... maybe then you'll also know what happens in the next fic

you can see all rockstar eddie x reader stories and lore at #enam3ls rockstar eddie or the masterlist! and check out my new series love, lola

 February 1993. 

The last words you'd heard from Eddie were muffled from the other side of a bad telephone line. Although the sound warped by the the airport's tannoy and bustling passengers, you heard his lust filled words clear as day. 

 'The second I get home, I'm going to ruin that pretty little pussy.' 

Three weeks since you'd seen Eddie. Three long arduous weeks since you had felt his touch. Corroded Coffin stowing away in a Joshua Tree music studio, hoping the barren surroundings would inspire new music. The writing process intermittently broken up by a series of gigs at intimate venues around California. Back in New York, the greatest city in the world had become the dullest in Eddie's absence. With damn Steve having swept your best friend off her feet you hadn't even anyone else to occupy your free time. Between your working hours, you'd managed to rearrange the bedroom, paint the living room and spend your months wages in retail therapy. But finally your boy was coming home and you couldn't lie, you were fucking horny. 

Left to your own devices for the best part of a month, no toy compared to Eddie. Your touch incomparable to the sparks he could ignite on your skin with just a featherlight stroke. Vibrator redundant now your body knew the sensation of Eddie's mouth humming against your clit. Dildo a mere cheap imitation of the way Eddie overwhelmingly filled your holes perfectly. By now the flight had landed, it was just a waiting game until he came through that door and you could show him how much you missed him. 

The front door slams open, handle cracking into the wall, sure to leave a dent but Eddie didn't care - he was eager. 

'Sweetheart, I'm homeee!' he sings. 

Bags carelessly discarded on the floor, all he can think about is being back in your arms. 

'Baby? I'm back!!' he shouts again. 

Eddie strips his jacket and kicks off his boots, giving you a chance to reply but to no avail. 

'Y/N? What the fuck, where are you...'

When entering the apartment, he'd been too excited to even realise the lights were off, the entire place seeming desolate. Socked feed pad along the hardwood floors as he moves further into your shared home. Kitchen? Empty. Bathroom? Empty. Study? Empty. It's only as he catches himself from slipping that Eddie notices a trail of petals leading from the front door into the bedroom, where the door sits ajar. Too wrapped up in wanting to see you, he'd failed to notice. Now he realises a soft glow seeping through the cracks. Grinning in anticipation as he pushes the door open. 

'Mother of god,' Eddie gasps as if the wind had been knocked out of his lungs. 

The lights are dimmed low, only aided by candlelight which together illuminates your reclining figure on the bed. His eyes scan your body, drinking in the sight he'd been longing for. Never in his wildest dreams did he think that sight could improve. Your cute toes wiggle in black stockings that travel up your legs and cut off at the meat of your thigh. Even with your legs crossed, Eddie can see a tiny black material that barely covers your pussy. Then your torso is adorned in a black bustier, hooks travelling up to where a deep v cut finished below your sternum; breasts spilling out of the ruffled cups. His cock twitches at the thought of ripping the hooks open. Your neck and collarbones are exposed, soft, delicate skin waiting to be marked by his lips. And then there's your face. Eyes sparkling at him, full of lust and love. Mouth struggling to keep a grin at bay. The face he went to sleep thinking about every night, woke up from dreams about and spent the day with it in mind as he tried to write music. Your arm reaches out, hand beckoning Eddie forward. 

'Hi Eds. I missed you... too much.' 

Your head nods down to his crotch now. Too lost in the vision before him, Eddie hadn't noticed the way his cock had hardened to the point of straining against his jeans. 

'I think you should probably take your clothes off and come and say hello,' you smirk. 

Instantly, he's scrambling. Head barely able to form a coherent thought aside from how he needs to touch you right now. T-shirt flings to one side of the room and socks to another. 

'Sweetheart... I - fuck. You look like a dream. I'm scared I'm still on that fucking flight or delirious in the stupid desert,' Eddie pants as he scrambles with the buckle of his jeans. The second his aching cock springs free you let out an inadvertent moan. As soon as his body is entirely freed of fabric constraints, he's hurling himself onto the bed and crawling up towards you. 

Eddie's lips kiss every inch of you as he moves upwards. His lips need to reacclimatise to the body he knows better than his own. Kisses pressed from the tips of your toes, your kneecaps, covering your thick thighs and then lingering on your poorly concealed cunt. He hisses as he leans in towards your mound, able to smell your arousal. Lips kiss the satin fabric of your thong and the skin it fails to cover. You're unable to stop your hips from involuntarily bucking as soon as he's near the place that's longed for him. Eddie's hands find yours and your fingers intwine, both of you gripping tightly at the other. Desperate to never let the other slip away for such a prolonged period again. Kisses litter up your sternum then across your pushed up cleavage. Once he reaches the plains of your collar and neck, Eddie indulges himself. Lips sucking marks onto the skin that's looking far too bare due to his absence. Teeth nipping gently causing those giggles that make his heart and cock swell. And finally, your faces are level, his hovering above yours. 

The pair of you just stare for a moment. Absorbing the person you'd both been lost without; reacquainting with every freckle, blemish or fleck of colour in each eye. Both of your hands have traveled up to cradle the other's face. Your fingers twirl the curls that frame Eddie's face, pushing them away so you can fully appreciate your pretty boy. 

'My pretty boy, I love you.'

Your noses rub against each other. Even this close, vision slightly obscured, you can see the blush that creeps up on his cheeks at the nickname. 

'I love you too, sweetheart. Gone crazy without you.'

Humming in agreement, you tug at his hair. 

'Feral,' you whine. 

Eddie chuckles in a warm, sexy way that travels to your core. His eyes look down at your body beneath him, admiring again the outfit you'd chosen. Retracting a hand from your face, travelling it down your side before he slides it between your thighs. The string of the thong wet with your arousal as he pulls it from between your lips, then pings it back. The brief contact making you whine. 

'Yep, I think you are feral, my love. Think I oughta do something 'bout that.' 

'Plea-'

Your plea is cut off as Eddie's lips crush into yours. The sweet kisses that had covered your body are gone, replaced by desperate wet ones. It's seconds before the kisses are open mouths, tongues flicking against each other. Hips pressing towards the other, frantically seeking friction. Both of you whine into each others mouth as you begin to hump. You push your hips up, legs spread achingly apart to trap Eddie between. In return, he presses hard against you. Thick length bearing down on your clit, occasionally sliding between your wet pussy. You're both groaning and grinding, transformed once more into hormonal teenagers and whilst it's good, it's not enough. 

'Gotta stop,' Eddie pants, 'this isn't - isn't how I wanna cum with you.'

You're unable to reply because your teeth are sinked into his shoulder to stifle the embarrassing moans scratching to come out. Never in your life have you been this pent up. Eddie tears his crotch away from yours, crawling back down your body. His hands, rough from weeks of constant guitar practice, firmly grip your thighs, keeping them apart. Doing so causes the thong to ping between the lips of your cunt which are now spread. His tongue flickers over his lips at your glistening wetness.

'Baby she's desperate... going to eat your cute little pussy now, 'kay? Missed her taste.'

You've been stifled by the built up desire, unable to produce anything but pathetic whinnies. But now you grab his hair harshly, yanking his head back up before his tongue can touch you. Wide eyed at your hard tug, Eddie looks up. 

'No!' You snap. 'Spin the fuck around and get on top of me. Need to taste you too.'

The sternness in your voice has the ability to scare him in the way every authority figure has previously failed. Careful not to squash you, Eddie turns around, swinging a leg over so he's straddling you and then slowly reverses until his crotch hovers near your face. Usually you'd be on top so now he's far too aware of his weight. But the firm grip on his ass that tugs him down makes him to cave. Instantly Eddie's thick cock is bottoming out in your throat. Tears well in your eyes but you groan, pleased that his taste and smell now dominate your senses. 

The luring natural musk of his skin and the slight salted taste of precum that had beaded on his tip. 

The moment he sinks into your mouth, his teeth sink into the dough of your thigh - the pleasure sudden and overwhelming for him.

'Oh fuck-' Eddie sobs into your skin as you adjust and start to bob your head up and down his length. 

Resting on his knees allows him to thrust in time with your movements, fucking his cock into your warm mouth. Eddie dives his face into your cunt, hand lifting away the thong that prevents him from burying his tongue deep into your folds. Humming at the taste he's been dreaming of for weeks. The vibrations cause you to gargle against his dick. After a few swipes of his tongue, lapping up the pool of arousal that had formed, he finds your clit. Tongue flickering over the enlarged bud, already feeling better than your fingers and vibrator had. Instantly, you spread your legs wider, granting him more access. Now he latches on, suckling at your clit desperately. The pair of you lie there, contorted to suck feverishly at the most sensitive parts of each other's body. It's overwhelmingly intimate and carnal. Something neither of you would've done for any previous lover. 

Now, Eddie lets his hand travel towards your hole that he knows is begging to be filled. Two large fingers plunge inside your cunt and instantly he feels your walls contract against him, eager to maintain the fullness. Your throat contracts in response as you moan at his fingers penetrating you. Eddie continues his assault on your clit as his fingers fuck into you. The pair of you forlorn in pleasure, you whimpering against his cock as he moans against your clit. Mimicking his movements and desperate to reward him, you bring your hand up to his exposed ass. You grab and knead the fat of his asscheek before letting a finger rub gentle circles round the rim. Immediately, Eddie breaks contact with your clit.

'Oh shit, please, baby, please,' he begs. 

Now you're warmed up, he slips in a third finger. As if to encourage you to go further with your own movements against his hole. You want to coo at his begging but your mouth is too full of his perfect cock. Applying firmer pressure as you circle his hole, you feel him ready. Finally you finger slips into his asshole, it's hot and desperate for attention. Walls pulsating against your finger. 

The pair of you mirror the other now. Fingers fucking into the other at the same pace, growing more brutal by the minute. Your mouths sucking and licking at the other's sensitive spot. Knowing both of you will only last a few minutes at this overwhelming pace, Eddie breaks away. 

'Y/N we gotta stop. I'm so close and I need to fuck you. Sweetheart, I gotta be inside you'.   

Eddie pulls himself out of your mouth, allowing you to instantly gasp for the extra air his thickness had been blocking. He moves back so your eyes can meet again, large warm hand cupping your cheek. 

'You okay?'

You nod as you catch your breath. 

'Yeah, Eds. Please, please fuck me. I need to cum,' you beg. Unbothered at the slight patheticness to your tone. 

Eddie removes your thong entirely now. 

'We both know that was doing nothing,' he laughs. 

Without guidance, you're putting your legs over his shoulders; an unsubtle hint that you need him now and you need him deep. He takes his length and lines himself up with your entrance. Then, three weeks of longing are broken as he thrusts into you. Too overwhelmed with wanting to even slowly enter you. Eddie is instantly bottoming out, balls pressed to your asshole as you wail at finally being filled. 

'Oh jesus - yes Eddie!' 

The volume and anguish in your moan takes even him back. He's never heard you be this desperate and it triggers something primal in him. Instantly he's thrusting into you fast and hard. Each unrelenting push jiggling your breasts further out the corset. 

'God I missed - ugh - this tight little pussy,' he grunts. 

You need even more. Your fingers yank at the hooks of the top until it parts and your tits finally spill out. Eddie moans at the sight. Instinctively, he's latching onto your hard nipples, folding your body in half to do so. Now he's sucking at your breast and fucking you deeper and it's still not enough. You're greedy in a way you've never been before. Making their way around his back, one hand finds his head, pushing him close to your breasts as your nails scratch his scalp. The other hand seeks his ass, squeezing it until you retract your touch and then crack your palm hard against his soft cheek. 

Instantly Eddie bolts up from your chest, staring at your eyes, wild. The warm chocolate of his iris, eclipsed by blown out pupils. 

'Did you just fucking spank me, sweetheart?' he chokes out. 

Now he's upright you're no longer able to reach so you seek a new method of showing him how you want it. Your hand now clutches at his throat, Adam's apple bobbing against the stretch of skin between your spread thumb and forefinger. 

'Yes and I'll do it again.'

You sound like a brat and you have no remorse. Three weeks of pent up frustration is now rearing its head. Eddie puts his hand over yours and squeezes it, encouraging you to tighten the grip at his throat. He's continuing to fuck you but his pace has slowed, intrigued by this turn. 

'Sweetheart,' he coos, 'what has gotten into you? I like it.'

With one hand flexing across his throat, your free one takes his and pulls it to your mound. Encouragingly placing it over your clit. Grinning, Eddie's fingers rub firm circles over it as he languidly thrusts into your cunt. Although at a slow pace, his cock plunges deep into you. Hitting the sweetest, most filling spot and then dragging torturously along it. The movements have your hard exterior crumbling and whining under him. 

'You- you were gone... I was... was so fucking horny. Couldn't c-cum,' you're gasping now. Eddie's motions along with the way the chocolate of his eyes appears molten at your confessions. 

'Not with you. Needed you... Eddie. Tried everything.' 

He bends down to give you a deep kiss. Years together and yet he remains in shock that you need him as much as he needs you. He hopes this kiss will wipe away your cute little pout. 

'Couldn't even play with your toys?' he murmurs, intoxicated by how fucked out you look beneath him. You shake your head, hands wrapped around his neck, thumbs stroking his skin. 

'Okay, baby. I'll make you cum, yeah?'

'Please Eds,' you beg. 

The smile that appears from hearing your pleas is heartaching. Then he starts concentrating on thrusting into you again. Speeding up his movements, languid pace abandoned. But it's not enough, the earlier momentum lost. 

'No,' your hands tighten on his throat, 'like before. Harder.'

'It wasn't too hard?'

The nails that dig into his Adam's apple tell him the answer before you do. 

'No. I want you to make me fucking cry.'

'Fuck, fuck baby, yeah okay.'

Instantly Eddie is folding you again, arms braced either side of your head as he towers over. Your knees press up near your shoulders. His pace quickens, fucking you senseless. The drawn out process of this evening has left you dripping. Sounds of wetness filling the room as he plunges back into you each time. 

'Hear that fucking sound, best music I ever heard,' he groans. 

Your hand seeks his ass again and you repeat your earlier actions. Spanking him again. The crack against his skin ringing even louder than the squelch of your cunt. 

'Oh fuck yeah,' Eddie cries, 'again.' 

The spanking repeats, each time you do it, his pace somehow quickens. Your clit is throbbing now, aching for touch again. You hand wedges between your bodies and you whimper as you relieve the ache. 

'Wait,' Eddie's shifting over you, 'from behind, wanna fuck you from behind. Only I get to play with your clit.' 

His voice is strained, you know he's at the edge of cumming. Eddie gets off the bed, standing and tugging your ass towards him once you're on your knees. The moment he slams back into you, your back caves into a deep arch and you both moan. 

'Yes, that's it!' he cries. 

Eddie wraps his arm under you, finding your clit and continuing his assault. Fingers pressing harder and covering a greater expanse than you ever could. The fast circles in time with his cock fucking into you. From behind he goes deeper, pressing against that one spot with growing frequency. 

'More,' you demand. 

He leans forward until his mouth latches onto your shoulder. Like this, he's prevented from pulling out far and instead it feels as if he's humping you. It's dirty and animalistic and it's what you needed. 

'Ed, I'm close.' 

His teeth sink into you now causing you to cry out, giving you exactly what you asked for. 

'Look at you... fuckin mess sweetheart... all cos you couldn't get my cock.' 

The tightness in your abdomen increases and Eddie feels how your cunt clenches round him like a warning. 

'Shit,' you cry 'please please come inside me.' 

Eddie instantly pulls you up so your back is flush against his chest. Fingers still toying your clit that has begun to ache from stimulation. His free arm wraps around you too, hand shaking around your throat to gently grip. Plush lips seek out your neck, pressing encouraging kisses as you near your climax. 

'Don't you worry baby...' he grunts against your neck. 

'Daddy is going to fill you up good.'

The nickname pushes you over

'Eddie,' you cry as you come. Three weeks have of build up, only worsened by tonight's teasing, come shattering down in a climax. 

'Holy fuck y/n,' Eddie chokes. 

He's realised before you and it takes you a moment to clock that you've squirted. Spraying over Eddie's cock and the sheets. He grunts like a feral beast at the sensation. An additional wet warmth showering over him alongside the tight clench of your spasming pussy. He takes a few more drawn out thrusts, sloppy from your cum. 

'Three... weeks... worth!' 

Eddie moans your name as his comes after his final word. You feel the heat squirt up inside you and he suddenly jerks, shooting out another load deep inside. 

'Oh jesus...' Eddie whimpers as he humps at you again, 'there's more.' 

And again another burst paints your insides. Instantly you flop forward, exhausted. A subconscious part of you whispers to make sure his spend stays buried in your cunt. 

Eddie watches as you wriggle back up to the pillows, collapsing with a sigh. Knees bent, keeping your hips angled up. He crawls onto the bed and opens your legs to take in the view. Pussy puffy and blushing and completely full of his cum. 

'Tryna keep me in there?' He chuckles. 

'Yes,' you blush. 

Bringing his forehead to rest against your knee he groans. 

'Fuck sweetheart, don't tell me that. My balls ache from how much I just came but you'll get me hard again.'

The desperate look in his eyes makes you chuckle. You tug him on top of you, his head falling to your chest. Stroking his sweat matted curls, you cradle his face. Littering kisses all over him as he hums in content. 

'I missed you so much Eddie. It physically hurt.'

'I know, Y/N,' he looks up at you smirking, 'could tell. But I missed you too. Missed home.' 

Eddie snuggles into your chest. Exhausted by the sex and blissed out in your arms. This is where he belongs, always. He's certain he'll fall asleep here for the night. The question he was going to ask on his arrival will surely have to wait til tomorrow. But it's okay, he's been waiting since October - so what harm is another day? 

my taglist angels: @whoahoney@lukewearingbeanies @esme-viridian @elysian-chaos @munsonology@mseddiemunson @kreepja

[helpfandom]

Platonic! Yandere! 2012 Kraang x platonic reader HCs + bonus.

Tribute to @yanderes-galore . They did this first and better! Read their's first!!

Hc's under the cut.

[By the by, I will try my best to keep with the kraang speech. And these HCs run under the assumption you are a friend of the turtles with low - moderate fighting skills. Oh! and April has the favoritism from the turtles. Honestly, I'm sorry but I kinda slander Donnie.]

Tw: Dehumanizing.

What even made them want to keep you as a little pet? You didn't have main character powers like April, but you also didn't care. You didn't care that they all looked alike, it probably happened because you were chill and Kraang Prime took notice and went: "That one." While pointing at you. You found no problems with them as long as they weren't bad people, up until the Turtles tell you about them.

Now, would they mutate you? No. Likely not, I have a feeling that Kraang like you better human. Besides, keeping a full intact human means that they can monitor and track your behaviors to become more human-like, as well as keep said human under constant vigilance! "This is what a phrase known by those we call the humans is said: killing two birds with one stone."

Once Donnie figures out the Kraang have taken a liking to you AND April, and he tells the rest of the team, Splinter askes both of you to stay in the sewers, but neither of you do. Because April being kidnapped would cause the Earth to end, the turtles [mostly Donnie though, because he doesn't care for you as much. Sorry.] decide to watch over April, instead of you.

This is likely when the Kraang kidnap you and bring you back, since the turtles are too busy watching April, the Kraang are free to kidnap you. Of course, the turtles care, but sadly not enough to save you first instead of April.

If the turtles fail to save you, but they save April, they'll retreat back and while Raph and Mikey desperately want to go back and save you because you're stuck there, Donnie and Leo stop them by saying that the time isn't right. Leo cares, Donnie not so much.

The turtles saving April first and then you would be a point of manipulation from the Kraang. "Those that are called the turtles have abandoned the one we call [Your name but in leet speak]. (Like how April = 4PR1L.)The ones called the turtles have been shown to be in favour of the one called April. Why not let the Kraang show you what the humans call "love?"

They definitely forget to feed you and give you water a little bit. I'm sorry, but they don't know how to take care of their own experiments, much less someone they see as a pet. Although once they found out they were starving their little pet / kid, they felt bad and put at least one Kraang in charge of keeping you well-fed and watered.

Oh, the Kraang see you as a little pet, just a nice little human pet that they need to take care of [order from Kraang Prime and their own Yandere instincts tell them to take care of you.] Since Reader can't do much or fight well, this definitely causes the Kraang to see them as weak and frail. Because of this, reader is dehumanized and belittled without the Kraang realizing since... they don't know better, they don't know that this makes you hate them more.

The fact that they have a hive mind makes them actually scarier, because you'll start realizing, what you tell one Kraang, gets shared with all of them. They all 'love' you, and so when you interact with one, it's like you interact with all of Kraang!

Think of it kind of like the Truman show, except you [Truman, in this scenario] know and can't escape.

The Kraang love watching you and always watch you no matter what, partially because they don't understand that you feel uncomfortable being watched, and because of their odd fascination with you.

I feel like at least one of them would start collecting things about you, and then the rest of them would start doing the same, like Kraang 3 will have a picture of you sleeping, and so then one day... you wake up to at least 10 of them taking photos of you sleeping.

If you ever give one Kraang a nickname, the other Kraang will be jealous. They will also want a nickname, and when it's their turn to take care of the human, they will do a lot to get your attention and call them something. Even if it's a curse word that they don't understand; it's something you called them personally.

BONUS!:

You woke up one day, still stuck in the stupid Kraang prison cell with nothing but a stuffed animal they gave you one month after you were brought here as a 'celebration for you coming home.' Like this place could be home.

You flipped over onto your other side to be meet with a shock. There was Kraang designation 314133KurezenAlpha. Or as you nicknamed him because of the 'humanoid' body they chose: Steve.

You sighed, then massaged your nose slightly before greeting him. "Heya Steve." The Kraang Droid stepped back from in front of you to a few feet in front of where you laid on the floor. "Kraang 626Alpha is not the one you have designated 'Steve.'" You squinted slightly at him. "My bad, you looked like him." The droid stood a little stiffer at your response. "Kraang 626Alpha accepts the human apology. Kraang is here to give what is called 'food.'"

You looked at what the Kraang Droid was offering you. It didn't look appetizing and looked more like a big slop of mess than anything else, but it was food. Well... pretty much food. "Thanks, I guess. You going to be the watcher for a while?" You asked the Kraang Droid, although it was already standing stiff, it seems to stand straighter when you talk to it, as if trying to be the biggest, or trying to show off.

"Yes, human. Kraang 626Alpha will be what you call the 'Watcher.'" You ate the food, deciding what to call it in order to find a semblance of happiness. "Do you mind if I call you.... Kevin?" With that, the little brain in the middle of the torso smiled. "Kraang 626Alpha doesn't mind being called Kevin by you. That would be known as 'awesome.-"

A few months later, you woke up one day, still stuck in the stupid Kraang prison cell with nothing but a stuffed animal they gave you one month after you were brought here as a 'celebration for you coming home.'

You flipped over onto your other side to be meet with a shock. There was Kraang designation 626Alpha. Or as you nicknamed him because of the 'humanoid' body they chose: Kevin.

"Good Morning Kevin." You smiled at him. Kevin was actually pretty entertaining, and you liked him the most out of the watchers in the past.

"The one you have nicknamed as Kevin has been reassigned. I am Kraang 31417888930."

Well, as you started talking to the new Kraang Droid that was now your watcher, you wondered where Kevin went.

Little did you know, Kevin was being decommissioned, and shoved in the trash disposal to make a new Kraang Droid.

He pulled out a picture as they took him out of his body, it was you. The last thing he saw was you.

[neverchecking]

You could consider this a request but the idea was too good to pass and I'm sure you'll be feral and foaming at the mouth if it wasn't in ur req box the moment it actually opens. So I'm writing this here for you to keep in your inbox before I forget and you'll mull it over and keep it preserved until it's time for requests to flood in again—

Remember Sadistic Reader? I bring u this: Dom! Sadistic! Reader x Sub! (Any of the chain) 🧍‍♀️

A reader who, after their little vixen side is revealed, it comes into play in the bedroom. ESPECIALLY in punishments. Maybe darling goddess wasn't pleased at the method they used to rid off a vermin, or rather maybe they were upset how nearly reckless their way of handling the pest was that they nearly got themselves caught. Sure, they didn't get hurt or get caught in the end, but their safety was on a tightrope and Reader couldn't help but be concerned and if the poor Link brushes it off as it's fine? Boi are they having it in the bedroom.

But the twisted part is that they probs did it purposely too, because they were much too starved for reader's attention. Too bad Reader knows this as well, oh they know. But did they really have to go through such unnecessary lengths? It's a bit unfortunate, but none of them really thinks it's as unfortunate anyway; Reader knows they enjoy being edged for a long time like the freaks they are until when the time that they deemed fit to let them come undone comes, and Reader will sit back and enjoy them wither under her touch until the sun rises.

She could only wonder how Hylia, much less Zelda even— would think of seeing their chosen champions a withering mess before them without her even lifting a finger to touch them. But whether or not the musing was said aloud only falls on deaf ears, leaving Reader to relish the show of seeing her feral handsome guard dog be reduced to a pathetic puppy.

(u can make it freakier and make this the entire chain being punished and Reader is just watching them—)

Alright I'm out bye—

Bestie. My cinnamon apple. The absolute gem of my life.

This. Every part of this. I didn't necessarily do request more imagine-

So, imagine Reader just giving them the look the second they step back into the inn they've chosen to stay at. A look that just spells danger in bright flashing letters along with a sharp frown that shoots of a matching flare.

Imagine the Link immediately knowing that he's in deep shit the moment he sees that look. His ears are going back and his shoulders are hunched. His steps immediately become slower and he debates dropping to his knees then and there, begging for forgiveness right then and there.

Imagine Reader silently watching him, assessing him, waiting to see his reaction. When he doesn't give her one, she's scoffing softly before turning on her heels, beckoning him to follow with one finger calling him forward.

Imagine Link stumbling over his feet, staying just one step behind his Goddess, watching her ever neutral expression. It doesn't shift though. Doesn't give away anything. It's frustratingly even and doesn't give him anything to go off of. Should he plead with her? Beg her? Kiss the very ground she walks on for just an ounce of mercy?

imagine the Link tries to brush it off, heaven forbid, or even go as far as insisting that it was no big deal. He's waving a hand flippantly all while feeling a bead of sweat tickle his spine. This feeling of not knowing eats him alive. He hates it. But he wouldn't dare question, much less talk back to his Goddess. That would be a field day for the rest of the chain.

imagine the Reader's gaze turns razor sharp and her steps suddenly stop. He's stumbling over himself in an effort to keep the distance between them. She's stepping closer and closer before her fingers, intricately delicate but just as iron clad, are pinching his cheeks and pulling him closer to her own face. There's a look in her eyes that tells him everything he needs to know. She knows.

Imagine the Link immediately bowing before her, his face scrunched in terror as he tries to think of a way to fix the situation. He knew he was being sloppy. He knew that it would come back to his Goddess because he ensured it would. He just didn't expect for it to feel this way. Of course, he never wanted to worry her, never- that would be sacrilegious- but he had just felt so...withdrawn from her presence. Like an addict who had gone too long without a hit. And It was brutal.

Imagine Reader is doing nothing but watching him for a tense second. Determining what punishment is worthy enough of this crime. She cannot be too cruel. That would make her no better than that wretched Hylia. Or, heaven and hell forbid, Zelda. No, this had to be as fair as it would be memorable. Something that could be seen as enjoyable at first before the overstimulation buzzed their veins and poisoned their minds.

Imagine Reader tying their hands to the bedposts, along with the Link's ankles before teasing them unlike ever before. Dragging feathers up and down their dripping shaft. Circling the head of their cock with a small shard of ice and watching it melt in delicious little drips. Maybe even letting candles burn and fall around the plain of their stomach, watching it harden before doing it again.

Imagine Reader doing this over and over and over again, until the Link is little more than a whimpering mess, pleading with her for forgiveness. Crying that he would never do it again, never dream of worrying her like he had done. Singing his hail Mary's and howling her hymns. Being nothing but a broken soul for her to weave and knit into whatever she wishes. Whatever suits her cause.

Imagine Reader tauntingly cooing over how shattered he is beneath her. How she had him so tightly wound around her finger, ready to snap the second she let him. How she knows he knows that he is nothing like the hero Hylia had crowned. That Zelda had deemed worthy. He is nothing to them, but everything to her. And she'll cherish their souls and hearts. He knows she will.

Imagine Reader making damn sure the lesson is truly sticking before letting up even just the slightest.

Imagine the rest of the chain (Minus Wind of course) being able to do nothing but watch. To simultaneously both learn the same lesson and acknowledge a new one.

One being that Their Goddess is just as benevolent as she can be strict. Never malicious, and never vindictive, but insistent on them learning and living with the knowledge that she views them as worthy. Not as Heroes, but as people. Her followers.

And she would never let anything happen to her followers.

Someone recommended calling this the Sweet but Psycho AU and I'm kinda digging it.

[vro0m]

Do you think if 2024 is just as bad/maybe slightly better we will still see Lewis on the grid? I know he wants that 8th title that is rightfully his, however, it has to be the most difficult thing mentally, physically and even on a spiritual level to have the hunger, fire and want to fight up front but the machine underneath you just doesn't do what it's meant to do and doesn't seem to align well with the driver in the seat which is so disheartening to see.

Hard question. Ultimately I don't know, because I don't know him and I'm not in his head, but there's a few things I imagine would have an influence on that decision.

SORRY IT GOT SLIGHTLY LONG (duh)

1- The contract

First of all let's not forget he's contracted until the end of 2025. We all know contracts can be broken but it does make it seems he's determined to not give up quite yet.

2- The car

Of course the car performance is the main thing. It's very unlikely, unless there's a legit engineering miracle happening, that the W15 will be able to challenge RedBull. But I don't think he's necessarily asking for that much. I think if the next car feels better to him in testing, and then he sees the development finally reliably go in the right direction, even if slowly, it'll give him enough hope and fire to sustain the effort for a bit longer.

3- The 2026 regs

If the car stays bad or doesn't get much better, the second main question imo is can he keep himself going until 2026 to see if the new regs change the situation. Can you imagine retiring at the end of 2025 just for the 2026 car being good again? It would be infuriating. 2026 is in quite a long time but I do feel like he wouldn't leave without checking it out if he can't get what he's still here for until then (and he almost certainly won't).

4- The mental side of things (amp up the speculation)

I feel like it's pretty clear he had a retirement plan and the Abu Dhabi 2021 finale has pushed that back. He also said he wasn't planning on still being there at 40. So on the one hand, he might be kinda done? Or more like he wishes he was done? I do personally feel like at times he seemed tired and disengaged (understandable). But it's not necessarily a bad thing to be able to put some distance between F1 (or anything really) and oneself imo, and not be starving and frustrated all the time because it's not going how you'd like. Take Alonso. Alonso wants to win extremely bad as well. I mean he hasn't won in 5'000 years but he's STILL trying at his old age (I'm half-joking). But ultimately his detached attitude in the face of lack of performance is what he owes his longevity to. He still wants it, but he doesn't let it get to him too much when he can't get it. It's not sustainable to be angry about something you have no control over 100% of the time. You will burn out. You need to let go.

On the other hand, can Lewis really detach? No one has been as fully dedicated, no one has sacrificed so much for so long, no one has put as much effort in it, no one has set such a high standard for himself than he did. His own teammates have been saying that. His own teammates have burnt out trying to keep up. AND he's being going at that pace for so long, been on the top for so long, I wonder if he even can let go enough to wait for better days without exhausting himself mentally in the meantime. He's not used to it. I'm not saying his career has been smooth sailing, he's had subpar or even bad cars before. But not for like. A decade. In a sense he's precisely in the position his teammates have been in. But instead of them VS Lewis, it's now Lewis VS the car, I guess? My point is in both cases, when you give it your 110% and don't see ANY result coming your way, you can't keep giving 110%.

Basically it's a fight between the fire in his gut and the dull reality of things. I don't know who wins because we haven't really been there before.

5- Time

The only similar situation was the last few years at McLaren but he was winning races even then. And his solution was move teams. I think it's unlikely he will do that again, most of all because he's running out of time. Back then he had the time to build up from the ground again, but it's not the case anymore.

So the last question is, if he does keep at it, until when? At some point he will have to retire. If he manages to win his 8th, then it's pretty clear-cut. If he doesn't, when does he stop trying? The longer he stays, the further from quitting while he's ahead he is. Maybe it's just my own feelings talking but I feel like it would be also very disappointing and annoying to leave in such a lackluster way after having accomplished so much. Although I guess that's often the tragic fate of champions. Anyway, there must be some kind of deadline in his head, maybe not a fully hard one, but at his age and with where he's at in life with the rest of his projects, I don't think he's blindly walking along anymore. We have no way of knowing what the deadline is though. Time will tell.

[hard-core-super-star]

You uhh...got any head cannons for kate bishop?

so many at any given time, lovely anon. i don't know if you had something specific in mind but i'm gonna leave a few of my current/favorite headcanons here:

kate is INCREDIBLY forgetful. she doesn't do it on purpose and she hates it but there are way too many things going on inside her brain at one time for her to focus on the mundane things she has to do like replace a glass she broke or buy a new pair of boots.

she definitely puts up sticky notes EVERYWHERE. on the bathroom mirror, on the fridge, on her bedroom door and she still manages to forget things.

it doesn't really bother her until she starts dating you and she keeps forgetting planned dinners and important dates. you never hold it against her which just makes her feel even worse. so, you take over for her.

you replace the old, worn-down, sticky notes with your own. they're a ridiculous pastel color that looks more ghostly than purple but something about the change in handwriting seems to help her. [or maybe it's just the fact that you went out of your way to do something nice for her]

speaking of her bad habits, she's touch-starved as hell.

it's not like her mom has ever been the warmest of people and she's definitely never gone out of her way to get the affection she so secretly craves so she just writes the need off and tells herself physical touch just isn't her thing...except it is.

it's such a subtle, comforting thing that she doesn't even realize it. she just knows she loves holding your hand and snuggling up with you on the couch while you watch some trashy movie.

you never question her about it but you know deep down, she needs the affection more than she lets on. something that becomes incredibly obvious after she comes home from a mission gone wrong and immediately collapses into your arms. she's tired and bruised and so done and yet she holds onto you for hours like you're her personal charger.

LASTLY, she has a lot of trouble sleeping sometimes [mainly due to nightmares and worries but also just her restlessness] so the two of you get into the habit of making tea and sitting out on the fire escape. [until she inevitably falls asleep with her head on your shoulder and you're forced to stay outside in the cold because she just looks too darn cute to move.]

alternatively, you take her on a walk. [and she loves it far more than she should]

[dpsisquared]

For the WIP game! I'm curious about all of these titles, but I think I'm most curious about "Engaged to Claude." My brain immediately thinks this is either a rom com or extremely angsty, lol.

Oh it's angggggst. VW Byleth saves Dimitri at Gronder. He's obviously in a bad place, so even though he has been in love with her forever, he makes it pretty clear nothing will happen between them. Not being able to marry the person she wants, Claude convinces her she might as well marry him as he is a friend and it will help Fodlan. (He is not very up front about his own feelings for her, framing it as purely practical.)

"I see he's asked you then," Dimitri said, gesturing to her hand. She frowned at the emerald ring sparkling on her finger. It reminded me of your eyes, Claude had said, and for a moment she had wanted to throw it back in his face. They weren't her eyes anymore. The green that met her in the mirror every morning only served as a reminder of what she had lost-- her father, Sothis, and her identity. She wasn't just Byleth anymore. Everyone saw her as something else, whether it was a weapon to point at their enemies, the savior arrived to solve their problems, or the symbol to rally to their cause. "You knew?" she asked. "Yes. He sought my blessing, in fact." "Why did he ask you?" Dimitri was silent for a long moment, leaning on the railing and looking out at the rising sun. "Who knows why Claude does anything?" he finally said with a bitter laugh. It was much too similar to the last time they had been together here. The Academy ball seemed a lifetime ago, before her father died and the world fractured. Twice she and Dimitri had been here in this tower, and twice he'd made it clear they would never be together. He'd known Claude would propose, and did nothing. No, he did do something-- he gave his blessing. It hurt to a degree she wouldn't have believed possible before Sothis and her emotions awoke. "Would you stay with me?" she blurted out, and his single eye went wide with surprise. "I--I mean to help me with the government. I have no idea what I'm doing." "Surely Claude will help you." "He left." "He left?" "He said he had to spread his dream to Almyra now, that he has some connections with the royal family there." "Forget dreams, there are thousands of people homeless and starving! And he left you to do everything before you were even coronated?" "He promised to come back." "When?" She shrugged. "Dishonorable bastard," he muttered under his breath. "All right. I will help you, only until he comes back."

[pecxiebu]

Rory Keaner x Reader

y/n pov:

My first day at the new school and I'm already exhausted. Having gone through the previous day organizing all my stuff in the small apartment I have bought was more tiring than I had thought, although I'm a vampire this moving made me lose a lot of meals and I'm starving. Getting out of my comfy bed, that I use only for the reasons that I like to pretend to sleep, I go to the kitchen looking for something to eat, of course there's nothing and I'm gonna have to be late.

narrator pov:

y/n goes back to her bedroom to change clothes, choosing a dark red long sleeve, to hide the blood in case she spills some, and dark brown pants with a pair of black shoes, tying her hair up she tosses everything she thinks she will need on her backpack, a notebook, her phone, an extra blouse and a new tube of sunscreen.

- am i forgetting something - she picks her backpack and scan the room for what might she have forgotten, deciding she has everything she goes to her living room to open the curtains for the three remaining plants that survived her bad memory - sunglasses, my sunglasses - she squints her eyes putting a hand between her face and the sun while the other close the curtains - great now i’m blind - overstating her conditions y/n makes her way back into the bedroom.

finally with everything she needs in hand y/n exit her apartament to start her hunting. - my keys, i forgot the keys - now with what she hopes is everything y/n start her dark blue Ford Galaxie, her most prized possession - where does a vampire goes to eat some breakfast - she drives without a rout for some minutes until remembering the reason she came to this town at all. she picks her phone looking for her friends number - hey jes, do you have any blood on you, i just arrived and i’m so hungry - he being the reason she moved to whitechapel therefore the reason she didn't eat a drop of blood for two days is going to have to help - great, you came in the perfect time, we just got some blood and i want you to meet someone - she didn't wait for him to complete the sentence before she was spending to where she remember was his house.

y/n pov:

- who could it be that jesse wants me to meet - trying to guess who that person could be i almost forgot that i was driving, hitting someone in a bike, looks like a kid - oh my i killed a kid - stopping i get out of the car kneeling beside the person, groning the mop of blond hair turn over and i finally see the boys face - i’m so sorry, i didn’t saw you, please say you’re okay - i take the bike off him looking for blood or a broken bone, he seems okay - I don't think it hurt as much as your fall from heaven - the boy says, going from a pained expression to a sly smirk.

“what” I ask with a giggle, confusion clear in my face. it’s this boy, that i just hit with my car, hitting on me. “well, you know, because you're an angel” he blush “that fell from the sky” i conclude with a smile, what a cutie. i offer him my hand for him, he takes happily and we both stood up, giving him his bike back “i’m y/n nice to meet you, but i really need to get going and sorry again for almost running over you cutie pie” i get back into my car waving my hand at him, leaving behind a blond blushing mess behind. “I'm Rory” he shouts a little too late for me to hear.

narrator pov:

thinking about the encounter with the cute boy, y/n don't notice the time passing and in a blink she's at jesse’s gate, stretching her body a little out of the car she press the button of the interphone “password” a male voice comes from the little box “i don't know, jesse didn't say anything” throwing her head into the seat cushion, she should have guessed there would be a password, reaching for her phone she hear another voice that she recognize as jesse “hello old soul, hope you like the changes i made in the house” the gates open and she enter, seeing the front garden brings y/n old memories, some better than others. everything looks the same but different in some way, at least they have a pool now.

y/n pov:

I park the car in front of the door, there are some other vampires scattered along the entrance. entering the house it's a mess, red cups thrown on the floor, they definitely have thrown a party last night, i also see some kids lying on the furniture. “Jesse, it's so good to see you, you don't look a second older, these kids' blood are really good on you” finally in the kitchen I see Jesse with some of his friends and a girl that i don't know.

Turning in my direction Jesse opens a fangy grin, coming at me, he opens his arms and gives a big hug. “it's so good to have you back, and don't be so modest, you're as good as I remember” I reciprocate the hug, going back to the times where we whore kids and everything was simple. As I got grat the others i can see a new girl staring at me “it's so good to see y'all again, but i’m really hungry, jes where is the blood?” I held onto my stomach feeling more and more weak.

“here o- that's also the password” i take the bag of blood out of jesse’s hand, biting with ferocity into the bag i drink the majority of it’s content, letting little spill out, the metallic taste fills my senses as it fills my stomach. i feel my body getting its energies back slowly, taking slow breaths i recompose myself “sorry i didn't get a lot of opportunities in the travel” i do a little burp, putting my hand immediately on top of my mouth. “no judgment, we all know how bad it feels” a dark skinned boy says with a simpatic smile, he gives me a paper towel “i’m Nathan by the way” i take the towel saying a “thank you” after i clean myself jesse calls me to the living room.

i seat in the couch and he sits besides me “i want your help with a newling” he says looking at me and a let a small giggle “don't say that the great, cult leader, jesse is in need of help” i mock him poking at his face, he takes my hand away from his angry face “i don't ‘need’ you, i only want your abilities to convince that girl in the kitchen to drink blood” grabbing my wrist with force, he carve his index finger in my pulse “i’m gonna do it because you’re my friend not because you order it” i pull my arm free of his grip, a fine string of black liquid runs down its length “i am not one of your followers jesse, and we both know who wins this fight”

I hastily stand up going back to the kitchen, Jesse follows a little after. that now there's only the girl i don't met yet “y/n thats Sarah, one of our most recents addition and also my girlfriend” he gives a peck on her lips. I smile at Sarah knowing that its probably not gonna last much, i shake her hand and notice she is a little nervous “it's a pleasure to meet you Sarah. i hope we can be friends, all jesse’s friends are my mine too” jesse motions to the girl with his head and i understand she is the one, not wasting time i take her hand “you don't mind a take her for a walk do you” i pull Sarah to my side smiling at her still nervous face “not at all, have fun” saying bye to Jesse, i guide Sarah to the back of the house where the trees provide a good cover of the sun.

“So how long do you know Jesse” I start, trying to ease her “a couple of weeks, maybe three i guess” passing through the pebble path. I see one of my favorite spots in the house. An old wooden swing that sits below an even older oak tree, i happily stroll the rest of the way, patting the open space i invite her to take a sit besides me “it’s seems like you know Jesse very well, how many long have you know him” she asks me, voice coated with jealousy. i turn a little so my body face her “you don't need to worry darling, Jesse is like an annoying brother to me. i would never date him” she relax a bit, embarrassment showing on her face “and i know Jesse even before he was a vampire and what an ugly kid he was” i recall the time i met Jesse, he had always been a bossy little brat, but in that time we were such innocent kids. I tell Sarah about how I met Jesse, how he looked before being a vampire and how he felt the first time he drank blood.

Looking at my phone i see that we been talking for about ten minutes and the classes started five minutes ago “shit we’re late” we stand up to make our way back to the front “i’m sorry a got you late for school, hope you don't get in trouble” we speed walk to the front of the house where there's only my car. “That brat didn't even call us” i kick the floor picking some grass, taking a big breath a turn to Sarah “do you mind show me the way to school, not that you have another option” i give her an apologetic smile, leading her to my car i open the door for her, i hop into the driver's seat frustrated with Jesse’s antics.

“Sooo… Sarah what type of music do you like” not wanting the entire drive to be a painful silence i say the first thing that comes to mind “i listen to pop a lot, but i really like pop rock, what about you” she appears to be more comfortable now “i like a little of everything, but i think i know a music you gonna like” i turn on the radio with my cd already inside, passing some musics i finally stop on the right music, i look Sarah’s way expectantly.

“Not bad” she bobs her head in the rhythm, I followed along and not soon after were dancing to the song. we share the moment and i feel that we gonna be good friends “looks like we’re here” she points to a brown brick wall building, there's no sing signaling what is the building “i really liked meeting you Sarah, hope we can be friends”

i give her a side hug and we go our separate ways, but not before i bump in someone “sorry, i wasn't looking” the blond boy from before kneels on the ground looking for something, next to my feet i see black glasses that i remember seeing on the boy earlier. i quickly get down and pick the glasses “here” i hand them over to the cute boy “i don't think i got your name” helping him stand i say “it’s Rory, and you’re y/n, are you going to study here i can show you around, i’m like suuupeeeer popular here” enthusiastically he puts the glasses on, he looks like a happy puppy that just got a treat “please Rory show me the to the principal's office” he opens a big smile and leads me to the doors opening them for me.

i am feeling this year is going to be special

hope you guys have liked and thank you for reading

@maggiecc

[sunny-reis]

OMG HI I LOVE THE WAY YOU WRITE AKITO!! may i request akito x reader cuddling after a long, rough day? if thats cool. oneshot if you do :) have a good one 🤞

oneshot - tired cuddles with akito

you're the coffee that i need in the morning; you're my sunshine in the rain when it's pouring

an: OUUYDHDHHDFH TYSM !! 🫶🫶 tbh i thought the other akito oneshot would end up being garbage bc i'm not as familiar with him or vivid bad squad (*'-'*) tbh i've been feeling touch starved lately so im gonna focus more on the affection here lolz (worry not it'll be a balance of fluff and mild angst)

tags: gender neutral reader, just a tidbit of angst (having a shitty day), intimacy

there's no way today could possibly get any worse.

at least, you hope so. sometimes you hit rock bottom and think it can only go uphill from there, but life comes back with a pickaxe, ready to dig until you're truly at your worst.

like today. you think you must've woken up on the wrong side, since absolutely nothing went right – you spilled cereal on your kamiyama high school uniform in a hurry, almost missed the bus, nearly fell asleep (and got yelled at for it) in math class, noticed your backpack was ripping just a second too late, and came home at the wrong moment, when the sprinklers were on, and ended walking inside completely soaked. needless to say, you’ve had a miserable day.

the thick piles and piles of homework to do don't help, either. as you lay in bed, mindlessly scrolling through pinterest, the deep pit in your stomach envelopes you in guilt. even though you've been trying to get up and start doing whatever you can get your hands on, maybe pre-calculus worksheets or an analysis of “the most dangerous game,” you find you simply can't, being too drained to do anything but lament in your head. mentally and physically, you barely have the strength to make it through the rest of the day.

hours go by, the bright afternoon sky becoming a beautiful purple-pink sunset around dusk, and you still haven't moved from your bed. your parents came in a handful of times to try and get you to let it out, but to no avail – you don’t foresee yourself getting up any time soon. it's only when your stomach rumbles that you sit up and pad downstairs to grab a snack from the kitchen.

pouring out a handful of cheerios into a bowl, you zone out, staring out the window overlooking the backyard. although you feel slightly better after a session of moping and lying in bed for hours on end, time goes by viscously; you find you’re still not out of the mental slump, and everything feels too overwhelming. the hair on your arms is too prickly, your sweatshirt too warm, and you have the sudden urge to claw at your skin. sighing, you trudge back upstairs and quietly shut the door, sitting down at your desk. after putting your phone on silent, you browse soap2day for a random movie to drown everything out with (and hopefully forget about the rest of the day).

after finish watching howl’s moving castle for the nth time, you sit up in your chair, stretching and yawning. although you still somehow feel like garbage, imagining yourself as a character sure felt relieving (and fed your escapism, but that’s a worry for another day). shutting your laptop down, you crawl into bed to try and sleep; the analog clock on your night stand reads 11:37. placing your phone on the table, you pull the covers over yourself in attempt to drift off.

unfortunately, your attempts were only fruitful for forty-five minutes at most. you awake to an abrupt thud on your window. brows furrowed, you shrug off the covers to see just what’s going on; opening the window, you’re met with the unexpected presence of an abashed akito crouched on the roof.

“akito? what the hell are you doing here, and at this hour?” you ask, eyes wide.

“can you let me in first? it’s cold and windy and i think i might fall.” facepalming, you help him crawl through the window, shivering at the suddend draft and closing it.

“so, care to answer my question?” you pick at him, flopping down on the bed and rubbing the sleep out of your eyes.

“i should be asking you that, honestly,” he shrugs, “i tried texting and calling you but i didn’t get anything back, so here i am.”

“oh…” you laugh sheepishly, “sorry about that, i had a shitty day and couldn’t stand having my phone go off.”

“aw, what happened?” akito asks, joining you in bed. you glance at the door, checking to see if it’s locked. although your parents are more than welcoming of akito, seeing him with you alone would be a bit of an unpleasant shock. leaning on his shoulder and pulling the blanket over the two of you, you recount your eventful day to him as he fiddles with a lock of your hair.

“and i didn’t even get to have lunch in between all that.” you add, whining. although you now find the events just a little funny, you still cringe in embarrassment when thinking about being yelled at by a teacher in public.

“i’m sorry all that happened,” says akito, pulling you closer to him, “but you know you can talk to me about it if you want to, right?”

“yeah,” you pout.

“well, are you feeling any better than before? if not, i know just what to do.”

“i think so? i watched howl’s moving castle and it made me feel a little better.”

“i think christian bale tends to have that effect on people.”

“for sure!” you not, “but yeah, i feel…icky, i guess.”

“maybe you should take a shower, sometimes that helps,” he offers, “but you should probably do that in the morning, you’ll get sick if you shower now.” you roll your eyes.

“really? that’s such a mom thing to say.”

“hey, don’t come to me if you shower and get a cold!”

“nah, i’m too tired to shower right now. since, y’know, i was in the middle of sleeping until someone woke me up.” akito laughs sheepishly.

“is it really my fault if you made me worried sick? i mean, i was just fulfilling my role as the caring boyfriend, don’t you think?”

“sure, whatever helps you sleep at night.” you laugh, laying down on his lap.

the two of you spend a while chatting in bed until god-knows-what time, when you’re rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. akito makes a show out of tucking you in, giving you a quick peck before climbing back out the window. you melt away into a dreamy sleep, feeling warm and fuzzy at the thought of akito’s warm embrace.