#two of the several lines from this movie that SENT me

[mhaccunoval]

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he was so real for this one

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

might be an unrelated ask with how things are going on right now, but the only way i ever see traitor ace theory coming into fruition is if he destroys yuu's way back home because of how his feelings will boil over (since he thinks being vulnerable is uncool). i've always tried to convince myself that his silly tsundere moments are yume bait, though i really can't deny the fact that yuu is literally everything that his ex-girlfriend is not. they've watched a horror movie together from idia's lab sr (and sending grim all alone to get snacks???) in playful stage, they ride a roller coaster, and if you tell him you like it, he suggests going again again (just the two of them without grim???) bro is not slick with how attached he is to mc.

I have my own thoughts on Ace traitor theory (which you can read here)! To summarize, I don’t believe in it. If Ace betrays us at all, I think it will be in a trivial capacity (like he does something stupid that the rest of the group disagrees with, like taunting Malleus to attack him) and without malicious intent.

He may think being vulnerable is uncool, but I don’t think he’d take an action as drastic as destroying Yuu’s route home no matter how emotional he got. (That feels more like the stuff I see in angst and/or yandere fan works.) Ace gets mad and acts out, yes—but it tends to be in situations where he feels like being has been wronged, not to hinder the people he cares about. His character and his actions the entire story have done nothing but demonstrate that he values his friends and will be there for them until the bitter end, even if he whines about it the entire time.

And well 💦 when it comes to “is this platonic or romantic”, I always default to “it’s up to individual interpretation”. TWST will never give a “canon” ship for Yuu because that would impede the self-insert mass appeal design of the blank slate character. Not everyone wants to perceive X (in this case, Ace) as a love interest. Not everyone wants to perceive X (again, Ace in this case) as a friend. Therefore, there’s always going to baity lines to feed the yume crowd (Michard voice: give me your ur wallets) but lines are also kept plausibly deniable (framed as “jokes”/nor serious) or ambiguous enough to be interpreted either way.

In Ace’s Suitor Suit vignettes, he says this about his ex: “She said the thrill rides were too scary for her […] She vetoed all the action and horror flicks. Hanging out was just plain boring, so I stopped contacting her as time went on.” And indeed, Ace engages in the activities his ex refused with Yuu. They’re watching a horror movie together in Idia’s Labwear vignettes, as well as riding roller coasters and other thrill rides in Stage in Playful Land. Yes, you can interpret these as romantic since they sent Grim off by himself to get popcorn and want to ride again by themselves.

However, that’s not the only possible interpretation, and nor should it be. It could just as easily be argued that Ace and Yuu were just hanging out as friends in a “kicking back with your bros” kind of way (regardless of whatever gender Yuu identifies as). Watching horror movies and going on exciting rides are normal things that friends could do together. There is nothing inherently romantic about those acts by themselves. It could also be said that Ace is lazy and constantly trying to get out of work, so of course he’d pass off the job of getting more snacks onto someone else. The ride thing is innocuous too—maybe the others just aren’t feeling another round, while Ace and Yuu are still on that adrenaline high and want another hit of it. And again, it’s probably framed as wanting to do activities with Yuu specifically to help foster that parasocial relationship and create a sense of bonding with the player.

Of course Ace is attached to us and likes to hang out. We’re his friend, and that much has been established since the prologue. We are naturally a lot closer with him by default compared to several of the other guys (with maybe a few exceptions, like Deuce). Whether you see Ace and Yuu’s relationship as anything more than that is up to the individual!

That being said, I’d rather not talk in terms that imply one ship is “better”, “absolute”, or “more supported by canon” than others 😅 Not just for Ace x Yuu, but any ship, really. It unintentionally frames the discussion like a competition and leaves some people out of the talk if they don’t vibe with it or have different preferences, y’know?

[jnginlov]

i love you, again

your boyfriend has a bit of an endearing habit when he gets drunk and after a stressful day you couldn’t be happier to hear it

⇀ pairing s.coups x reader

⇀ genre fluff, slight hurt/comfort (but just the comfort)

⇀ style one-shot/blurb

⇀ word count 1.6k

⇀ warnings drinking (reader has wine, cheol is drunk), talk of being stressed, food, so sickly sweet

⇀ reactions from the gc “You love me so much🥹this was perfect”

note i wrote this MONTHS ago for syd and i guess myself cause i had the shittiest week known to man (ignore the formatting idk why i was writing with capitalization bleh)

Seungcheol wasn’t known to be a lightweight, especially compared to some of his other band mates, but there were certainly times when he’d gotten past the point of making sense. You predicted that tonight might be one of those when he’d texted you that he and the boys were all going out to celebrate the end of their incredibly successful promotions for their latest comeback. Usually he might invite you to tag along, as many of the members enjoyed bringing their partner along, but he knew you’d had a tough day, the kind only recovered from by alone time, so he had let you know where they were all going and that he’d probably be home a bit late, and you were honestly a bit thankful that you would have the entire apartment to yourself for the next few hours at least. You loved your boyfriend, but honestly if you had to interact with another person face-to-face for very much longer before you had your personal decompression time, you might just break down.

So, when you get home you move as slowly as you feel like, pouring yourself a glass of wine, running a bath with your favorite bubble mix, that you remind yourself to thank your boyfriend for restocking earlier in the week, and ordering your favorite comfort food to be delivered just before your skin would start to wrinkle in the water. Once you’ve settled onto the couch with your food and pulled up your favorite movie you can already feel that most of the day has melted off your shoulders.

As the movie ends you check your phone for the first time since you've gotten home, there are a few notifications from your friends and a couple messages from Jeonghan. You two are certainly friends but he’s not really a casual texter so you’re slightly confused until you notice the images he’d attached.

The first picture is just Seungcheol, a candid of him laughing at something one of the other boys must of done or said. He was always better at taking those aesthetic boyfriend pictures of Cheol than you were, but you like to blame it on the years of practice he had before you even knew either of them. The second picture is obviously from later in the night, and you notice that it was only sent a few minutes ago. There are several empty glasses in front of your boyfriend, and you can spot at least three empty soju bottles, but most notably he is very cutely posing for the camera, a blush dusting his cheeks as he pouts his lips.

You giggle as you reply to Jeonghan with a quick and simple laughing emoji before you place your phone back next to you on the couch and set up for your second movie of the night. You don’t feel a buzz next to you for the entire first act of the film, Jeonghan often not responding unless he has something else to say, but just as the main character is starting to reach the peak of their conflict your phone lights up with a call from your likely very drunk boyfriend.

You answer as soon as the movie is paused, smiling gently as you say, “Hi Cheolie.”

You hear his muffled giggle on the other side of the line before he replies with a drawn out, “Hiiii.”

“What’s up?” you ask, knowing that he must have called you for a reason.

He giggles again, although this time he forgets to cover the microphone and you can hear the tinkle of his laugh as clearly as your phone speaker will allow. His giggles always had the same effect on you, feeling light stream between your ribs as butterflies brush against your stomach. Instantly the rest of the tension you’d been holding in your body seems to melt away, swallowed by the love struck smile your boyfriend has to be wearing on his face based on the way his next few words come out.

“Hmm, I want to tell you something.” He says it lightly and you’re starting to realize how gone he must be. You can faintly hear the muffled sounds of the bar he’d been at for the past several hours but you figure he must have stepped out of the main room, if not all the way outside, because the background sounds don’t cover his words at all. “Can I tell you something?”

“You know you can tell me anything,” you reply quickly, telling the truth even though you’re familiar with the secret he’s about to spill.

Every few months, once your boyfriend has gotten sufficiently inebriated, his memory will seem to fail him and he will forget how far you’d gotten into your relationship. This means that wherever he is, whatever he is doing he will suddenly have a burst of longing for you and will need to “tell you something”. This something is always along the lines of how much he loves you but he will treat this fact, that you already know and had probably heard him tell you at least five times that day alone, as though it’s a new confession. The other boys think it’s funny but you find it adorable that the man you love returns your feelings so strongly that he basically can’t keep them to himself even if he’s not sure you two are even in a relationship.

You hear Seungcheol take a deep breath through the phone before he says, “Okay but it’s really important.”

You chuckle lightly in admiration and try to control your smile as you reply. “Would you rather do it in person?” you ask, never having this happen with him over the phone. Usually this would happen when you were together drinking, so although you’d had a glass of wine earlier you were certainly more sober than you’d been any other time he’d done this.

“No!” he practically shouts in response. “I’m too nervous,” he responds quietly, although his words are slurring together and so you almost don’t hear him.

“Okay,” you say fondly, your own smile no longer able to be fought off by your self control. “I’m listening,” you reassure him as another chuckle slips past your lips.

He takes a pause and you almost wonder if he’s going to not say it. Maybe you misread the situation and he is actually telling you something that you’d rather hear in person. You feel a bubble of doubt form in the bottom of your stomach, itching with nerves as you wait for your boyfriend to stumble through his next words.

As soon as he’s opened his mouth you feel that bubble pop and the itching is replaced with warmth as he, as clearly as he can with all the alcohol running through his system, says, “I love you.” It’s a firm statement, said with the tone of a fact but the way you can practically feel Seungcheol’s tension radiating through the phone almost makes it feel like a question.

“I love you too,” your reply rolling off your tongue as easy as every time you say it to him but never losing any of the tenderness you hold for your lover.

Seungcheol suddenly releases a breath on the other end of the line and you can almost hear his lips stretch into the loving smile he always gives you after hearing those words.

The next few moments are filled with comfortable silence and you’re almost afraid to break it before you ask, “When are you coming home?”

This seems to almost bring him back for a moment as he must be remembering that, not only is this not the first time he’s told you he loves you but, he shares an apartment with you, where he gets to go to bed with you every night and wake up to you every morning. You’re patient as you wait for him to catch up and you almost feel bad for ruining his romantic alcohol related fantasy until he has suddenly come back to reality.

“Right now,” he says with an urgency, and you can hear him open the door that had separated him from the commotion of the main room. “I want to hold you,” he adds as a sort of explanation and you faintly hear the sounds of Jeonghan calling your boyfriend’s name.

“I’m all yours,” you reply with a light giggle, shaking your head as you get up to move to the bed, turning off your forgotten movie and packing your leftovers for the fridge.

“Wow,” he breaths out faintly in disbelief causing you to let out another giggle.

“I love you,” you remind him, partly just to hear him sigh in that lovestruck way he does when he’s in this mood. “I’ll see you soon, baby,” you add and you can hear him drop something or bump into something as all the other boys groan at him and you laugh.

“I love you too, bye,” he says quickly as you can hear the boys starting to hound him about what he’s doing before he hangs up.

As you bring the phone away from your ear you notice how different you feel from when you first got home and even from just before your boyfriend called you. The stress from your day had dissipated almost completely and you almost forgot that you’d originally wanted to spend your night alone. So as you get comfortable in bed, and wait for your sweet Cheol to join you, you make a mental note to allow yourself to enjoy your boyfriend’s healing energy when you might feel like isolating again.

↼ misc masterlist

[wileys-russo]

yes possessive tooney! maybe you’ve been hanging out with Mary and Millie a lot recently and no one knows you are together and she’s jealous so she kisses you hard to show them you’re hers (even though they already suspected you were dating her bc you both had matching hickeys a few weeks ago)

req based on this tiktok: https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSNBeoh5Y/ headlock II e.toone

"baby do you want to get a chinese?" you heard your girlfriend call out from downstairs, loud voice carrying her ever alluring mancunian accent up to your room.

"i'm going out el i told you this morning!" you called back, huffing in annoyance as you messed up your eyeliner again, forced to wipe it off. "what do you mean? goin out where? with who?" the girl was by your side in record time with a frown.

"for sushi with mary and mils." you groaned as you once more messed your eyeliner up, turning to your girlfriend with a pout. "why wasn't i invited?" the brunette scowled, grabbing your eyeliner and pushing your legs apart as she moved to stand between them.

"you told me you and less had plans!" you defended, closing your eyes as your girlfriend gently grabbed your face, helping you to fix the wonky lines. "yeah she's coming over to watch a movie and eat junk, like we always do! i assumed you were included in that plan." ella huffed, stepping away from you.

"well i assumed you were actually going to do something when you say you have plans. not potato it out on the sofa and sit in silence for several hours!" you teased making her roll your eyes.

"and was it not you who said it's good if we do stuff together and separately so no one finds it suspicious?" you reminded, moving back into the bedroom as she followed, only alessia aware the two of you were not just roommates and were actually dating.

you'd tried to keep it from her but with how much time the blonde spent at your flat and how well she knew the two of you it was inevitable she eventually figured out there was something else going on.

"you always hang out with them! stay in with us. please?" ella pouted, sitting down on the bed and giving you the best puppy dog eyes she could manage. "mmm no." you ducked down and smiled, pecking her lips a few times before grabbing your bag off the bed and hearing her groan.

"baby!" she huffed after you, footsteps thumping down the stairs. "i'm serious you're always with them two. i miss ya!" she tried again as you only shook your head in amusement. "maybe i like their company more." you teased causing her pout to change into a frown.

"i see you every single day baby, at training, at home, at games, at-" you started to list things off on your fingers, ella rolling her eyes and grabbing for you. you grunted as she pushed you harshly into the wall behind you, pressing her lips to yours in one last desperate attempt to convince you to stay in with her.

"not gonna work. but you can continue that once i get home!" you gently pushed her away with a suggestive smile, reaching for your keys. "no. if you have to go then i'm driving ya and picking ya up." ella ordered firmly, smacking your hand away and grabbing your keys first.

deciding against arguing with the incredibly stubborn girl you allowed her to do as she wished, directing her to the restaurant and being barraged with text messages from the girls you were meeting, well that you were now late on meeting.

"bye el, i'll call you once i'm done or i'll get maz to drop me home." you sent her a smile and pecked her cheek, well aware of your team mates and friends watching on from a few metres away, millie clapping her hands impatiently for you to hurry up as you popped open your door.

however before you could step out of the car an arm snaked around your neck and you tensed up in surprise as ellas hand firmly grabbed your jaw, pulling you into a bruising kiss.

within seconds her tongue was down your throat and you were trying to pull away hearing the whistles and jeers from your friends behind you. "not yet, kiss me." ella mumbled against your lips, her grip on your jaw tightening and holding you firmly almost in a headlock as you gave in and kissed her back.

tapping her leg once air became an issue she finally let you go for a moment, hand still on your jaw as she pecked your lips a few times ad released you, your lips tingling and slightly swollen as you tried to clear the hazy fog in your mind.

"so i guess we're telling people now?" you breathed out, glancing sideways at your girlfriend who only grinned happily. "just lettin everyone know you're a taken woman baby." ella smiled as you sighed, unable to be mad at her as you rolled your eyes and allowed her to steal one last kiss before you left her behind.

"oi oi nice of you to finally join us mrs toone!"

[tarjapearce]

That First Kiss

Pre Soccer Family! Miguel O'Hara x Reader

Warning: 0. Just fluff. Mildly suggestive towards the end

Summary: The first kiss shared with Miguel ~

After that dance back at Peter there was something undeniable blooming between Miguel and you.

He had tried to kiss you after all, only to be denied by a simple yet crucial mistake made by none other than his own doubts.

He mulled over your words over and over. Would've something changed if he invited you properly to the party? Maybe something, maybe everything. He didn't know anymore but his mind was set into achieving that kiss.

Would it be too desperate if I want to kiss her?

He had asked Peter.

Cause in all truth, Miguel O'Hara, a prodigy, and soon to be ascended in the Alchemax's bureaucracy lines, didn't know a peep in flirting, much less in when to make a move.

The epitome of such thing was him telling you about the party, but not inviting you.

Social gatherings weren't his forte but Peter and Gabriel had been kind enough to include him in every activity and prevent him from being a forever stunted wallflower. The reason why Peter always asked him to cook for his parties.

And the reason he was having an override in his system after you left him with his lips pursed, perfect to touch yours.

"If you wanna do that, means you're into her. That you like her."

Peter mumbled while sucking the sauce off his fingers.

Despite the disgusting sight his red eyes got at the moment, he knew Peter was rather intuitive when it came to these things. He wasn't a complete idiot.

But with MJ at his side, Miguel had secretly made Peter a prime example of what to do and not do when it came to women.

"Can't believe she refused to kiss you." his friend snorted while drinking the last bit of his Corona.

"Don't remind me."

Miguel rubbed his face and picked up the dishes.

"Look, you're the only one that hasn't realized she also likes you." Peter smirked when Miguel gave a faint and proud chuckle at his words.

"You just gotta make a little more effort if you know what I mean."

"Not really."

"C'mon pal, I know you had a girl back in college."

"Dana? We just lasted a semester."

"Still is experience. Negative or positive. But your friend that's into you too, is a new chance to make things right. If that's what you're after."

"I wanna take it slow and see where it leads us."

Peter nodded but then shrugged.

"Tell me something. Do you want just a hookup with her?"

"No."

"What do you want then?"

"Get to know her more and see where it takes us." Miguel mumbled a tad sheepishly.

"Do you want whatever it is to be something more?"

"If she wants to. If she doesn't then... I'll leave her be."

"And how would you do that?" Peter kept inquiring and Miguel seemed to actually consider his words.

"By inviting her to a dinner or a movie."

Peter smiled and nodded proudly. "You're welcome. Now... All you gotta do is save her number I totally did not asked MJ, and invite her." Peter sent him your number and washed his hands.

"I got you, pal. Don't screw it up this time though."

-----

Would you be asleep? Would it be rude of him to suddenly text you out of nowhere? It had been a week of staring at his phone screen, glaring at your name on the chat log and watching the profile picture change a couple of times.

A week of pure self torture and replaying the many scenarios of him being fooled and rejected. He was angry at you for making him this nervous and, angry at himself for not being able to press send after rewriting several times the future message that could either make it or break it, before anything could even take off between you two.

"If you're trying to see if you have telepathy, I'm telling you, it's not working Miggy."

Miguel rolled his eyes and heaved a frustrated sigh.

"I like her. You haven't even started something and you're already nervous."

Miguel threw a pillow at Gabriel and the latter laughed to then return it.

"It's just a message, not a proposal."

"How do I know-"

"Goddammit" Gabriel groaned annoyed.

It felt like time slowed down when Gabriel pressed his fingertip against the screen on the send button.

Three letters were sent. And the seen icon showed up.

Hey

But his heart thumped harder when the three dots appeared on his screen along a message

Hello, stranger :)

Gabriel snorted and patted his shoulder.

"Good luck, Miggy."

----

Hey

Hello, stranger :)

It's Miguel. Peter gave me your number.

Oh? Too afraid of asking it yourself, Dracula?

He chuckled while accommodating the pillow behind his head.

It always escapes my mind doing so, Pitufina.

Sorry if I'm interrupting .

My overthinking maybe, so thanks for that.

His smile widened

Must admit though, didn't expect you to message me.

Sorry for taking that long. Wasn't that sure you'd engage into this.

'Engage into this' he says. Relax, I ain't biting.

Unless that's your sort of thing. I don't judge :) .

A little warmth spreaded through his cheeks as he read the message with an airy chuckle.

Wanna find out?

I believe the polite thing to do before that happens, is for you to take me out on some dates, sir.

He had you right where he wanted. With a deep breath he typed, not letting the sudden burst of boldness that took over to waste.

Then next week, a dinner on Friday. I'll pick you up at 7.

He left no room for doubts, just a yes from your end.

Yes, sir.

And it was official. Miguel O'Hara had a date.

Then a second and a third. Tonight was the fourth one. Something regular, more intimate and comfortable. A movie night.

I'm going through the popcorn section and there's no spicy one. And I know you give the caramel ones the mean eye.

They get stuck in my teeth, preciosa. Not precisely something I enjoy removing.

I've got Butter Lovers and classic.

Bring the classics and some tajín. I'll prepare them here.

Ok. On my way

You closed the chat log and went to the cashier.

----

Even though he had explained you that he didn't have a problem by paying up in all the dates, you still wanted to give some of that back. He had refused but eventually agreed upon sensing your pouting through the texts.

So you were in charge of the snacks this time. You'd be a liar to say if you didn't go overboard with it. The usual candies and some Mexican snacks he talked about in the past dates.

Movie begun, both of you laid on his couch, inches away from touching each other's knees and shoulders. A bowl of popcorn on his hands big enough for the both, some soda and other candies.

The movie played, earning a few giggles here and there from you and sometimes Miguel.

You didn't know when his fingers grazed your shoulder, or when his arm draped around you.

You could feel his heart thumping through his solid and warm chest, inviting you to rest your head on it.

And when you did, his whole body tensed, to finally relax when you smiled.

His eyes had long stopped focusing on the movie, rather your expressions and reactions.

The way your eyes crinkled with joy, your lower lip trembling on a specific sad scene and how lovely they stretched whenever a laugh came out of them.

"God, that's so corny."

You tittered while resting your head ontop of his chest again. Body relaxing with a deep and silent sigh.

Your fingers curled softly ontop of him and his hand immediately opened to hold yours. Long and calloused fingers entwined with yours.

The darkened room and the dim light irradiating from the tv were the perfect catalyst for him to inch his head closer to yours.

Miguel gulped when you craned your head upwards to watch him,

"Are you ok?"

He nodded but gulped again when your tongue misted your lips, as if preparing them for an emerging endeavor.

"You? Are you enjoying?"

A sweet smile stretched again in your lips. But your eyes were locked in his, breaking the contact for a minute to stare at his lips.

His arm pulled you closer and one of your hands slid through his cheek, caressing his skin, mildly prickly with stubble.

He was about to speak, but closed his lips to finally dip his head and kiss you. As if deciding that going for it instead of asking made it better.

Your lips received him with a soft sigh that only deepened when he placed a hand on the slope of your jaw to keep you in place as his lips kept kissing and marking yours in slow and gentle motions.

Your hands thrummed over his chest, and soon both of his hands were gently cupping your face. Some of your strands entangled in his fingers.

Neither wanted to break it. Not when his tongue was curling and playing with yours, fighting sensually for control. But your lungs demanded air. And when the kiss broke, he took a deep inhale to give gentle pecks on your sweet tasting lips.

"Happy?" your forehead rested against his and his hands roamed your back. Taking a much heat he could from you.

"Very." Another peck and you bit him softly. He returned the bite with his fangs trapping your bottom lip to then deliver a gentle lick on it.

"Can I have more?"

He put a strand of hair off your face and tucked it behind your ear while nodding with dazed eyes and a warm smile on his face.

"Los que quieras, mi amor." (As many as you want.)

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

I was watching the boy, the mole, the horse and the fox, and was one of the lines that made me think of a small scene for a drabble.

Where during a bad storm, as Mc is comforting Julian, holding him close and cuddling under the blanket or in a pillow fort to dampen the noise of the storm. To try and help him relax, Mc says something like, 'When the big things feel out of control, focus on what you love, right under your nose.' Followed by 'The storm will pass.' While gently messing with his hair.

Inspired by this scene from the movie;

https://youtube.com/shorts/Eyxkv8Cyo5w?si=lrsC82nmDliycwoJ

The Arcana Drabbles: Comforting Julian during a storm

You knew as soon as you saw the grey clouds brewing on the horizon that it wouldn't be an easy night for your beloved doctor. What you didn't expect was for it to escalate as quickly as it did. You'd planned to have several more hours before the storm hit, but by the time you made it to the front door of your shared home, the rain was already splattering down in fat drops of water and lightning was crackling across the sky above you.

"Julian? I'm home!"

No response. The house was dark when you walked in, making you wonder momentarily if he was still at his clinic. Another flash of lightning lit up the sitting area as you walked through it and you miraculously heard a faint whimper despite the thunder rolling through the house.

"Julian?"

"Here."

The embarrassed, shuddering whisper came from inside the shadow of the couch. When you rounded the corner, Julian was wound up tight in a ball on the floor, lanky limbs curled in on himself, one hand stuffing his glove into his mouth to muffle the sobs that sent tears streaming down his cheeks. Oh ... it really is bad, this time.

"I'm sorry -" Another rumble of thunder makes him jump, his mouth snapping shut as he tucks his face into his arms. He flinches when you lay a gentle hand on his shoulder and you can feel the ragged, rapid breathing wrack his bones. His voice cracks when he tries to speak again. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't be like this -"

"Don't be sorry," you tell him, "I should've come home sooner."

He doesn't have much to say in response to that, too busy rocking back and forth as he clenches one knee with his fist. You lean forward to wrap your arms around his shoulders and he buries his face into your neck with a sob.

"Can you stand up?"

No response, just a series of quick nods against your shoulder. You lean back and pull him with you towards the bedroom. He's freezing.

"Take off your boots and get under the covers. I'll be right back, okay?"

"Okay." He sniffles shakily and takes a seat on the mattress, fumbling with the ties on his boots in the twilight of your unlit house. You scurry out to the stove to heat up some water and grab a lantern or two.

When you get back, it's to a shivering lump under the thick quilts Mazlinka gave you and a rapidly darkening room courtesy of the rain beating against the window. You set the lantern down on the bedside table among the clutter of his spare eyepatches and patient notes and climb onto the mattress.

"Can I come in?"

You don't get a verbal response, just a corner of the blanket lifting as he makes space for you to join him. He clings to you as soon as you lie next to him, curling his legs up around your hips, pressing his face into your chest, and twisting his fingers into the back of your shirt. You rest your chin on his curls and take slow, even breaths as your wrap your arms around him in turn.

"I'm here."

"Thank you."

The trembling begins to subside, letting you wriggle one arm free to place the hot water bottle you brought with you at his lower back. He shuffles to accommodate a more comfortable snuggling position.

"Ah - that's some lovely warmth, my dear."

"How are you feeling?"

"I'm sorr - I mean," he catches himself mid-apology and tilts his head up to meet your eyes, "I'm ... feeling better, I thi-"

Another crash of thunder makes him jump, and you can feel the shivers running through his body as you hold him close. You can tell he's trying to hold himself together by the strain in his shoulders and neck but that doesn't stop the front of your shirt from slowly soaking with tears. You wrap yourself around him again, feeling him curl up smaller, and bury your nose in his hair.

"When the big things feel out of control, focus on what you love, right under your nose." He stills for a moment, taking a deep, shuddering breath before lifting his face again. You slowly slide his eyepatch off his head and run your fingers through his hair. "The storm will pass."

He loosens his grip, sliding up the sheets to lie face-to-face with you, and offers you a watery smile despite the sound of the wind howling around the corners of the building. "I love you."

"I love you too."

He tangles your fingers with his and pulls them to his chin. "Thank you for being here."

There's so much you want to say to that, but for now a kiss will have to suffice.

[burnyouwithacigarettelighter]

(4) TENDER LIKE A BRUISE ─── ethan landry 𖦹

ೃ⁀➷ “The heart is the toughest part of the body. Tenderness is in the hands." — ‘The Country Between Us’, Carolyn Forché

pairing. spiderman!ethan landry x reader

warnings. swearing, mention of blood, death, alcohol, and sex

summary. after that stint with the spidersuit on halloween, quinn’s getting suspicious… (1) (2) (3) (4)

a/n. sorry for the long wait everyone! also sorry that this is such a short chapter, i sprained my ankle the other day LOL

iiii.

The night after you save Ethan in the Spidersuit, you and your entire friend group are crowded in the apartment, ready to watch a shitty indie movie Mindy got from her uncle, who was as big a movie-geek as she was. 

First, however, Quinn had flicked on the news. She coursed through every channel, until she stopped on an opinionated broadcast by the name of the Daily Bugle, some obscure network that Ethan had worked at for, like, a year while he was still in highschool.

“He’s kind of, like, the devil,” Ethan told you one time at a diner, a place you landed in since you two couldn’t choose which place you wanted to order at. 

“J. Jonah Jameson seems like a very interesting creature. Devilish for sure, though,” You said, scrolling through the man’s miniscule Wikipedia page, alongside a handful of tweets using his biased shaming as reaction videos. 

Ethan held the plastic-lined menu in his large hands, turning it over to see the other side. “He was big on work ethic, meeting your quota, having to show him every article before it was published, stuff like that. It was really efficient, actually, but he was just… insufferable.” 

“Worst boss ever?”

“Worst boss ever,” Ethan said, shaking his head and taking a sip of his drink - a chocolate milkshake. 

So, it really was a surprise that Quinn was itching to watch his news, practically vibrating out of her skin. Even in general it was uncharacteristic of her, as she always seemed bored to death by the news Sam watched in the morning. 

“Quinn, I thought you hated the news.” Tara said, mild mannered and sitting down next to Mindy. 

“Especially this bald head-ass,” Mindy said, scooching over to make room. 

Quinn waved off everyones protests. “Someone I know is in this.” She then sat on the floor close to the television screen, “I just need to watch this one bit, ‘kay? Then we’ll get to whatever epistolary movie you want, Minds.” 

“It’s not epistolary, it’s a mockumentary about—“

“Yeah, yeah, we get it, Uncle Randy’s got you all educated.” Chad walked in with a pillow, pushing his sister over and plopping down right in between her and Tara. 

You were in the kitchen with Ethan, heating up bags of popcorn in the microwave, when Quinn cranked up the volume of the news way high. You could now hear it from there, and you both caught the segment's tagline. 

“Spiderman’s New Sidekick: Menace, or Martyr? Just last night, the attention-seeking “hero” was seen causing more mayhem in the city of New York. The troublemaker was accompanied by a similar web slinging partner - though still suspiciously hiding their identity. The following clip has been sent anonymously to us.”

The tv network then played a clip of you, fidgeting with the web slingers, clumsily making your way through New York and hitting several garbage cans over in the process. Your suit, however, was encapsulated in darkness, and all anyone could see was that white hood and those big curved eyes the mask had — tell-tale spiderman features. 

Your eyes darted to Ethan’s own, who was wide-eyed and pale. 

Ethan had long grown inured to the media’s attention on him, seeing as he had been doing this spiel for two years now - but you being in the news was a whole other story. 

The boy leaned over, presumably to whisper pretend sweet nothings in your ear (truthfully completely panicked thoughts about you in the suit) when Mindy interrupted your thoughts. 

“Oh my god, Quinn, don’t tell me you’re watching Jameson bash Spiderman because you don’t like him?” Mindy groaned, sinking into the couch. 

Quinn was quiet, which was really just an answer. 

Mindy leaned over from her spot on the couch. “Give me —“ she and Quinn wrestled for the remote, “the remote, I can’t listen to this entitled senior citizen bash Spiderman any longer—“ 

“He’s informing the public about a troublemakers misdeeds—“

“He should be informing the public he’s getting admitted into a senile care home—“ 

Then the two of them landed on the floor with a thud, the microwave went off, and Chad took over Mindy’s space on the couch, artfully “yawning” and placing an arm on Taras shoulder, who gave him a look but didn’t shrug him off. 

Well. So much for a peaceful night. You can see why Sam spent so much time at Danny’s place. 

The majority of you were sporting hangovers, and had wished to experience a relaxing evening, falling asleep to the droning of a Meeks-Martin Movie Recommendation (a name Chad protested everytime you said it, saying, “it’s associating me with Mindy’s movie-geek bullshit”) whose philosophical points generally flew over your head. 

(Hangovers excluding you and Ethan, who had spent the rest of the night patching eachother up, in which you were privy to Ethan’s nursing skills - or more accurately, the lack thereof. 

You had found yourselves once more in the apartment's cramped bathroom, except this time you were getting bandaged up for the scrapes on your elbows. 

You were squirming under Ethan’s touch, his hands in a heavy grip on your forearms. At some point, Ethan had enough of your movement, used his large hands to pull you close by the waist, and continued his idle work on your arms there. 

The manhandling had you so flustered you dared not move for the rest of treatment, turning your head away from the mirror so as not to reveal the terrible blush on your face. 

On the other hand, Ethan was completely oblivious of the nature of his actions, focused on bandaging your wound correctly. 

In the end, despite all the fuss, he forgot to use rubbing alcohol, and didn't know how to tie the bandage, leaving an articulate bow to finish the wraps off instead. Still, you appreciated the effort. 

He had done it in his awkward, stilted way, which was incredibly endearing in its own right.)

Silence flooded the room, until you pulled the popcorn out of the microwave, and you and Ethan poured the bags into their respective bowls for each person. 

Mindy and Quinn then untangled themselves from each other, getting up and wiping the dust of their clothes like nothing had ever happened.

“So,” You said, trying to play it cool, “what’s the deal with Spidey, my boyfriend's boyfriend?” 

Ethan followed from the kitchen, pushing you playfully (and hoping this fake nonchalance was convincing enough). “Turn that nonsense off, Q. Don’t you remember Jameson’s outburst when I quit?”

The man had had a tantrum when Ethan quit the poor summer job he was working in their offices. 

Ethan got the job in the first place because his dad was part of the NYPD, and Jameson thought Ethan might be able to spill some incredibly confidential “juicy” details about ongoing cases. When Ethan failed to deliver, Jameson forgot about him, and he spent two months doing miniscule tasks, like sorting paperwork or going for coffee runs. 

Suffice to say, it wasn’t the office experience Ethan was hoping for, so he promptly quit. There was also the awkward matter of Jameson’s increasing hatred of Spiderman, wherein Ethan was forced to regularly voice his “irritation” toward the hero. 

(Which was kind of hard to put his heart into when, well, he was the hero.)

And although it was a proper quitting, too, with a two weeks notice and everything, Jameson didn’t care, and berated seventeen-year old Ethan in front of the twenty something workers he had under his feet. But Ethan hadn’t cared too much either, and went to the theater to watch a movie right after. 

You and Ethan waited for Quinn’s familiar jabs at Ethan’s old job (in which Quinn had laughed for a solid ten minutes when he came home from quitting, in utter shock that her little brothers first job ended with a 60-year-olds toddler tantrum), his “love” of Spiderman, or even just Ethan in general - but nothing came. She merely shifted her gaze from you to him, before shrugging, and handing the remote back to Mindy. 

So movie-night was back on, but a certain feeling was creeping up both your spines, twin looks being traded between you and Ethan. 

What exactly had prompted Quinn to watch a broadcast about Spiderman? No matter how much she ranted about the hero, she equally hated Jameson and the news. 

You wracked your brain for a single solution throughout the entire movie, and it had only clicked when Mindy began her routine film-analysis, bringing out the small, rollable white board you all had tried to hide from her, just so you wouldn’t need to listen to any more movie essays. 

You got up, and pulled Ethan along with you, Mindy shooting you two a disgusted look, and Chad throwing you a thumbs up. 

(You hadn’t noticed, but Quinn’s eyes trailed after you with a glint of suspicion.)

“She knows,” you said, hushed and ducking in the dimly lit apartment hallway near your bedroom. 

“What?” Ehan said, brows furrowed. 

“She knows. Quinn.”

“Quinn knows what?”

“Oh my god,” you refrained from hitting him, “Quinn knows you’re Spiderman.” 

“What?”

“Quinn knows y—“

“No, I mean, what as in what the fuck?! Are you sure she knows?” 

“I just - she was looking at us weirdly during the Spiderman broadcast, and through the entire movie, too—“

“That doesn’t mean she knows, right? She could be looking at us because we’re “dating”, or because — ‘cause I’m her stupid Spiderman geek brother, or—“

“Okay, but she could also be looking because she knows you’re Spiderman, knows I’m the weird sidekick on the news—“ 

“[Name]! Just,” Ethan pressed two fingers between his eyes, “can we let this go? Just for tonight?” 

You sighed, leaning your head against the wall. “Fine! Let’s just… pretend none of this ever happened. That she, like, probably doesn’t know.”

“[Name].”

“Okay! Okay, you win. But just for tonight, because I swear, if I wake up tomorrow and my mom’s blasting my phone because Quinn told someone about it—“

“She doesn’t know!” Ethan repeated, before sticking his fingers in his ears and walking away like a little kid. 

You shook your head at his immaturity, but stuck your tongue out at him when he wasn’t looking, anyway.

After that isolated incident of suspicion, you and Ethan kept a particularly close watch on his sister's actions, reactions, and movements.

How she reacted when Ethan raved about how much he “adored” Spiderman, the faces she made when Sam passed The Daily Bugle channel on TV, how guarded her body language was when you walked around Central Park and someone called out from afar that Spiderman had just swung by. 

And she was so fucking suspicious. 

Quinn’s eyes would thin, looking at Ethan and you when he talked about Spiderman, she’d watch intently when Sam passed Jamesons channel, if even for a second, and she’d look to the skies every time somebody shouted “Spiderman” in the park or the streets. 

Ethan countered your every thought, however, constantly reminding you of her previously mentioned hatred for the hero, using that as an excuse for her every move. 

You two find yourselves arguing over the matter again, this time while walking across campus to your next classes, having to hold hands as you did so just so people wouldn’t think your arguing was actually you two in the process of breaking up. 

“E, she knows. I mean, for gods sakes, what person who doesn’t know sends their brother nasty looks when someone talks about Spiderman?” 

“Well, maybe, I’m her little brother who she’s made fun of every moment for the last nineteen years?”

“Oh my god, Ethan, we can’t keep pretending she doesn’t know you’re Spiderman!” you whisper shouted in his ear, pretending to pick something out of his hair. 

“Well, I was just suspicious, but you two have gone ahead and confirmed it for me.” Quinn suddenly appeared beside you, walking in tandem with your paces. 

Then, you and Ethan both stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, shock still, jaws dropped, almost getting hit by a bike in the process. 

“What?” She said, tilting her head to the side. 

“What?” Ethan said back. 

“What -“ You began, but the irony sunk in rather quickly. “No, fuck— Quinn, how the f— how did you find out?” you whispered low, pulling her by the sweater sleeve as you began walking again. 

Quinn looked back to make sure nobody was listening secretly, like she had done just moments prior. “Again, I was just suspicious. Knowing was all you two. But… you guys are kind of, like, really obvious. Like, on movie night, you were fighting in the kitchen about the popcorn, and when I turned on the news you went quiet. When me and Mindy argue about the better heroes, you look at eachother like you’re about to burst out laughing every time I say I hate Spiderman. And your Halloween costume,” she pointed at you, “had a hood that looked a lot like the one on TV.”

You scratched your cheek sheepishly, considering the facts against you. “Okay, we are… more obvious than I thought.” 

“We?” Ethan said, incredulous. “I’ve hid this for years.” 

Quinn snorted, stifling a laugh. “Ethan, you’re fucking terrible,” she punched her brother, “at lying. I just never brought it up. Honestly, what the hell is “I’m going out for patrol — no, I meant I’m going on a date with [Name]” supposed to mean to me?” She mocked Ethan’s nervous stuttering. 

Ethan went red. “I— well, — I mean, dad doesn’t even know, and he’s like a bloodhound.”

Quinn shrugged. “Sure, he doesn’t say anything, but he also never reports any unnatural cobwebs he finds on the criminals either.”

“I’ll be damned,” Ethan said, starstruck. You patted his shoulder pitifully. 

“Does anyone else…?” You gestured lightly to the general population on campus.

Quinn shook her head. “Not that I know of. And I won't tell anyone, if that’s what you mean.” 

The three of you stopped to sit at a water fountain, the conversation becoming much more serious by the look of Quinn’s face. 

She had bit her lower lip, suddenly looking far off, a mix of melancholy and fury shining in her brown eyes. “As long as you don’t get yourself killed, Ethan, I won’t tell anyone.” 

Ethan gulped, probably remembering all the times he did exactly that. “I promise, Quinn, I—“

“Because I know you will, Ethan. And I will fucking dig our brother out of the earth if you dare to—“

All of a sudden, this didn’t feel like a confrontation between friends — it felt like a heartfelt conversation between family, and you felt very out of place. 

Just seeing how furious Quinn looked, but how her lip trembled, how fists clenched with the memories of their brother, how Ethan leaned away, trying to escape any confrontation in relation to their brother, how his expression tensed - it made you feel icky, like you were interrupting that which was none of your business.  

As you were about to leave, step away from the incredibly private situation and duck into your school building, Quinn grabbed you by the hand. “[Name], promise me, please, keep my brother safe. You’re in this way deeper than I am, so…”

She waited for confirmation. When you didn’t respond, Quinn continued. “You love him, I can tell, so please, just… keep him alive, for me, okay?.” 

Your mouth opened and closed. She still thought you two were— 

You considered telling her the truth, but - but her gaze was so desperate, tone so heartfelt, the only thing you could do was nod.

From there, you could feel the guilt eat at you, simultaneous to the burning you felt in your heart. You wanted to protect Ethan, you wanted to keep him safe - you did not want to lose him, for that would be like losing a limb. 

And then Quinn’s words echoed in your ears once more: you love him, I can tell—

You breathe, in and out, conscious coming back to the Earth, and you slip away from the pair of siblings, Quinn’s words ringing in your ears, Ethan’s gaze lingering on you as you stepped into Blackmore.

taglist: @iloveneilperry @backtotheshitshow @hazehepburn @powowowy @ifilwtmfc @oscarisdaddy69 @al1v3cvp1d2@bloodyeverything @diamondci1ty @l5bryinth @gojosbucket @volturi-girl-imagines @sflame15-blog @thatoneembarrasingmoment @bajadotcom @cerealzzz @elynk @theapulidooo @solaceinwritings @1horrormoviewhore1 @anthemabby @mia-luvs @dont-get-upset @knxv1lie @verveta345 @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @xyzstar @ihearttokissboys

strikethrough = wouldn’t allow me to tag, sorry!

[shepherds-of-haven]

hi i hope you're having a good day! this may be quite silly but i'm curious, what are some typical dances for the peoples of blest?

Hi there! This was actually sent in for the Patreon Q&A in April, but something horrible has happened to Patreon's site in the last several months, where after a certain amount of text, the text editor becomes horrifically laggy and crashes constantly, meaning I did all the work (i.e. watching so many medieval and ancient dancing videos and reading all about various cultures and their dances) to answer this question, but the website stubbornly would not let me type up my answer in the existing Q&A post... 🥹 So I kept losing all my progress on this one and ultimately ended up giving up, but I still wanted to answer it, so I hope it's okay that I answer here!

The short answer: the typical dances for the people of Blest obviously are going to vary widely between cultures as well as classes within those cultures. People from the southern isles dance quite differently from people in the Eastern Continent, who in turn dance differently from people in Jalis. I'm not going to cover too much of the kinds of dancing that we don't see much of in the game, though I will note that Ket and Hunter cultures tend to favor dancing more as a form of story-telling or individual expression (often seen in plays or festival rituals where specialized dancers are playing specific roles or parts), with elaborate costumes and dance techniques being employed in each culture (some traditional Ket dancers use fans and masks, Hunter dancers often dress in swirling costumes with rattling beads and employ hand-drums), rather than the communal dancing we might envision in, like, ballrooms or barnyard line-dancing. The Elves have a mix of both, with dance as "performance" as well as dance as "socializing" utilized in equal measure, and performative dancing is seen as a high art form that deeply utilizes perfectly synchronized music, color coordination, and movement to create mesmerizing group displays, almost like synchronized swimming or Cirque de Soleil type experiences. Mage culture, in general, doesn't put a lot of emphasis on dancing, as many Mages tend to trend introverted, solitary, or unathletic, so as a society it's not viewed as a really vital skill or even a part of their larger culture outside of the usual school/festival dancing, which isn't so much taught as it is just stumbled into.

Anyway, the two primary forms of dancing we seen in the game are what the nobles do and what the commonfolk do. I imagine dancing among aristocrats (formal balls, the Trade Minister's gala, parties at the Sun Court) to be pretty similar to what you'd see in Regency-Era dancing, with waltzes, quadrilles, and cotillons being the most common style.

However, it should be noted that the "English country dance" that was typical of the Regency era (where men and women form two lines, facing across from their partner, and are not permitted to dance alone as a couple, but side-by-side alongside others) is not something that is present in Blest. If you've seen any Austenian movies like P&P 2005, you know what I mean.

^ So not this!

It may factor into a dance a noble has to do once or twice in their lifetime, but it's pretty unusual, and a guest without a noble background (like Riel or the Shepherds at the Trade Minister's gala) wouldn't be expected to know it.

Among the commonfolk, dancing typically takes place during festivals and holidays, in the streets or on the village green or town square, not within a formal venue such as a ball. As such, there are really no formal moves or styles ascribed to this kind of dancing--it's primarily dictated by what kind of music is playing, and you basically just jam out to it however you want, in a group, couple, or as an individual--but the closest real-world equivalents I could liken it to would be the medieval carole or free-style polka. But there are no formalized rules other than basic proprietary/decency, and even then that can be pretty lax once the drink is flowing.

However, while I don't have any formal name for it, mostly I just imagine the dance scene from A Knight's Tale. :)

[yarameijer]

Hi again 👋,I am here after reading chapter 42 of accidental reverse and it's epic,it was definitely worth the long wait,I am a sucker for tenma&shuu and tenma& shindou friendship,so,I can't wait for the next one, How's recovery going,well I hope. love from Hana

So,one thing that really bothers me about inazuma eleven is that they gloss over relationships that are important.I get this anime mostly focuses on soccer,but still,I thought about and tenma got betrayed 4 times in the series,4 Times,That's insane

First,shuu: I don't like that they completely glossed over this in the movie,I get that they didn't know each other for long,but tenma trusted him and shuu clearly knew they'd be playing against each other,being part of the team that beat raimon up, completely disregarding tenma's reaction,not patting an eye at tenma's best friend being locked in a cage like an animal.no matter how you look at it, that's a betrayal,I know the "fixed things"at the end of the movie,bit, tenma must've been hurt that someone he trusted betrayed him from the very beginning but shuu didn't apologize and I hate that.

Next, taiyou :I talked about this one in my previous post,What Taiyou did even without telling gouenji about anything interesting tenma told him(because that's not canon),what he did is a huge betrayal,Not telling tenma when he knew of his involvement in the revolution,acting cold and rude during their match,lying to his friend's face, completely disregarding his friend's feelings.That's a huge betrayal and I wish they payed attention to it,it was overshadowed by shindou breaking his leg and again tenma must've been hurt.

Next,Fei: this one's self explanatory,He apologized and I guess he betrayed all of raimon,but again,He and tenma were definitely the closest and he was hurt.

Next,The one that hurt him the most, tsurugi:I don't think I have to explain this and my hand's tired.

Not to mention that tge team treated him horribly in the beginning,like,shindou literally beat a junior up and I know he was upset,I know he was angry,but that doesn't excuse it,He's older and he should've taken it easy on a newbie who helped them before.and he never apologized.

Kurama was definitely the worst,He was rude,cold and blamed tenma for literally everything wrong in the club which is ridiculous and he never apologized.

The rest of the team, basically stood by and watched,The only ones on tenma's side from the very beginning are shinsuke and Aoi,which is why I love this trio and I think it should get more love.

So,my point is that everyone treated tenma horribly,no one apologized except for Fei and those betrayals must've hurt.

I want these guys to realize they messed up when they see tenma being hesitant to tell them something or see him more comfortably sharing things with, let's say,earth eleven more than them, specifically Taiyou and shuu.

Could you write a drabble about it.

Sorry,this is so long.I read A.R chapter 42 and came to vent.

Love you ❣️

Oh boy do I have feelings about this.

Through the years of writing stories, as I grew older, I started looking deeper into the characters' mindsets, to try and give them a more realistic and individual representation. This means it isn't always in line with what is shown in the anime, but I don't really mind. Tenma's character is pretty interesting to me because of three reasons: his cheerful attitude, his insecurities, and being allowed to move miles away from home at age eight.

The first two are quite well known in the fandom already and more people have experimented with it, but it's the third one I rarely see. Someone even told me it wasn't a big deal.

Is it really, though? What would such a thing do to a child? What kind of family situation would it be for parents to allow their eight-year-old kid to move several hundred miles away, for years? I get that he wanted to play at Raimon and that they were supporting him - but he started that school at age 12/13, so why would he be sent to Inazuma Town four years before he could even attend Raimon? It doesn't mean Tenma's parents are bad or abusive, but it does imply there's a more complicated situation, one that could actually explain quite a lot of Tenma's insecurities. It's just something that's been keeping my mind occupied lately, and I'm planning to use it in my stories more. 

All in all, I feel like Tenma's character can be quite complicated, without a ridiculously complicated and tragic backstory. It just doesn't fit, y'know? And it's a bit too cliché for me. Putting that aside for now, there's also one more specific characteristic I've given the Tenma in my stories: he has a hard time opening up, which means I'm not sure whether the issues you mentioned are ones he would just talk about. The Tenma I'm writing is much more likely to try to deflect a topic so I don't think I can fully 'finish' this? The issue won't be resolved by the end of the drabble because healing takes time, and I think I might build on this idea in future chapters more. I'll try my best though! And I didn't include Earth Eleven cuz they didn't seem right for this role. Instead Aoi gets some more love XD

So, just a warning, I have an idea for the start of this drabble but beyond that, my mind is blank. I have no idea what I'm about to write so bear with me here, and let's hope it's not too messy.

------------

Tenma has never had a lot of friends.

He told his yearmates, once, when they were hanging out at his house. Kariya and Hikaru had been talking about the team, about how much fun every day was, about how they weren't used to it. Tenma, relaxed and content and safe, agreed.

They'd been surprised, a little disbelieving. They were nice about it! But Kariya's, "For real? Could've fooled me!" had stuck with him, no matter how teasing it had sounded.

It's the truth, though. Before Raimon he'd had Aoi, and one or two people he would sit with during lunch at school, but that was about it.

He loves Inazuma Town, now more than ever - but making the switch from his relatively small seaside hometown to this busy Tokyo district was hard, harder than he'd admitted to anyone but himself. It's not that he didn't want to, but... Aki always got so sad when Tenma was sad and he could see her brightening whenever he said he was happy (and he was!) and okay. He didn't understand it fully back then, but he thinks he's starting to. Aki had been so young.

(Sometimes he's guilty, for putting more weight on her shoulders. For making her look after him when she was barely in her twenties.

Sometimes he's angry at his parents for putting such a burden on her. For ever getting it in their minds to ask their young cousin to be responsible for an eight-year-old child.

Sometimes he's angry at them for allowing him to go in the first place.

Most often, though, he's angry at them for making him want to.)

Tenma was in a new town, living with a relative he barely knew, and painfully shy. His soccer obsession didn't exactly help - everyone likes soccer, of course, how could they not when seeing all those hissatsu? But they don't live and breathe it like he does, like his teammates do. When the kids in his neighborhood found out that soccer was all he ever focused on, they lost interest in him pretty quickly.

(Most of them, at least, and the ones who didn’t - well, their interest wasn’t exactly a good thing.)

Aoi was an exception. But, Tenma has long since realized, Aoi is absolutely crazy in her own, hidden way (she'd have to be, to put up with their team's shenanigans).

Anyway.

Tenma isn't very experienced in the friends department, as surprising as many people seem to find it. He's never really cared, to be honest. He'd had Aoi and Aki and Sasuke and he found out early on that a lot of people just don't care. Fighting that never worked out for him, so why bother?

"Tenma!"

The sudden call has him looking up, brought back to the present.

Shindou has twisted around in his seat. He looks vaguely annoyed. "Finally. What's got you so distracted?"

Tenma blinks. "I'm sorry, senpai," he responds automatically, surprised by his own absentmindedness. He didn't expect to be so caught up in his daydreams with his entire team around him - the noise level in the bus is, as usual with them, high, and the air is filled with a familiar excitement at the prospect of a match, especially after so long.

"It's fine," the strategist sighs, a smile finally pulling at his lips that Tenma would almost call fond. "Just don't zone out all day, alright? We can't afford that when facing Arakumo Academy."

"Right," the captain agrees easily.

He expects that to be the end of it because Shindou is turning around in his seat again, leaving Tenma to his thoughts once more - but it isn’t.

"This is the second time you're distracted when we're playing against Arakumo," someone else drawls - Tsurugi, who's seated on the opposite side of the bus aisle, arms crossed and lounging in his chair like a king. "I'm starting to suspect a pattern."

Tenma, for lack of a better reaction, smiles and shrugs. He doesn't know what to say to that, because it's true.

Their last, and first, match against Arakumo wasn't his finest moment, he’ll readily admit.

Thankfully Tsurugi doesn't care much for his lack of reaction, focusing once more on the book he was reading. Tenma watches him for a moment, and then looks out of the window again.

He knows it's bound to get his mind wandering again, and he's not in the mood for another scolding, but there's not much else to do. Shinsuke next to him is playing a game on his phone, Hayami and Hamano in the row in front of him are discussing homework. Everyone else is either caught up in their own conversations or seated too far away to comfortably converse with.

Tenma starts tapping a mindless rhythm on his knee to keep himself in the present. He's restless. Hopefully the match will get him out of his head - he's not even sure why he's so distracted.

(That's a lie.)

He should be fine, right?

Everything's fine.

It all worked out.

School has started again after the summer holidays - of which he spent the first half in space. It still feels unreal to him, despite over a month having passed.

Not much else happened during the holidays. He'd caught a plane to Okinawa and stayed there pretty much until school started again, only returning to Tokyo a day and a half before. It had been nice to be back home, spending most of his time on the beach or exploring the familiar streets or practicing soccer by himself. He’s gotten sufficiently tanned, as well, and it was pretty funny to see Tsurugi’s annoyance at that once he got back.

This is their first match after the break - school's been in for only a week - and beneath the excitement, there's some nervous energy too. Arakumo is one of their most challenging opponents and they all know it.

At least it's only a friendly match instead of anything tournament-related, so the usual pressure of winning (especially when trying to lead a revolution against a deluded tyrant organization) is absent. Maybe, Tenma muses, that's why he's so distracted.

The fact that this is the first time he'll be playing against Taiyou since their argument doesn't exactly help. They've talked about it at length, and they've tentatively been texting and even hung out once over the summer, but there's a sense of discomfort that they're still trying to get past. Tenma, if only in his own mind, can admit he's worried about how any competitive interaction will affect them.

He doesn't want to lose Taiyou's friendship, but…

The brunet sighs and shakes his head. At this rate he's just going to keep on being distracted, and inevitably disappoint his team. He doesn't want to take that risk for their first match after such a long break.

Or, any match, really.

Especially not after-

Well.

After.

(He still cannot help but feel a bit jumpy, after all the arguments with Shindou during the Grand Celesta Galaxy, after Tsurugi’s kidnapping, after, after, after.

It had felt like he'd been on thin ice when he first joined the team, but that sensation had slowly but surely faded as he found his place.

Now, after, he hates that he's once more double-checking his every action. Hates that he's lost the sense of security in where he stands that had been near unshakable before the Grand Celesta Galaxy.)

Tenma is, once again, brought back to the present, this time because their bus is slowing to a stop. A glance out of the window tells him all he needs to know, and he hides a grimace.

Seems like they have arrived at Arakumo Academy.

------------

Raimon reaches their destination right on schedule, Shindou is glad to note. They'd left early so they'd have enough time to get ready and go over their strategy before the game starts, as they usually do, but Arakumo is a challenging enough opponent that any extra time is welcome.

They're guided over the campus in the direction of the soccer stadium and Shindou takes in the sights with mild interest. It's been a while since he's visited Arakumo - their previous match had been in one of Fifth Sector's stadiums. The prestigious academy hasn't changed much. It certainly lives up to its reputation, not quite as large as Teikoku's buildings, but nothing to look down on either. It's got a more serious appearance than Raimon, with red-toned walls and roofs with cloud patterns.

However, Raimon is here for a match, not to play tourist, and soon they find themselves in their assigned dressing room to get ready for the match. It's as the team is entering the room, getting ready to change out of their training suits, that a ringtone disrupts the usual chatter.

It's uncommon enough that Shindou finds himself glancing up, involuntarily raising his eyebrows as Tenma scrambles for his phone. He catches the captain's gaze and Tenma shoots him an apologetic look while he answers the call. “Hello?”

Shindou turns away and smiles at Kirino on his other side as he reaches for his bag, but despite his wish to give his captain some privacy, they’re right next to each other. It’s impossible not to overhear the one-sided conversation.

“I apologize, this isn't really the right time,” he hears Tenma say, sounding genuinely sorry and surprisingly formal. “I'm playing a match in-”

The brunet falls silent for several moments after the, assumed, interruption. Shindou unzips the jacket of his training suit and shrugs it off his shoulders. He's already wearing his uniform underneath the track suit, so he won't take long changing.

Next to him, Tenma starts talking again. “I understand, but I,” and falls silent yet again. Shindou frowns.

Something about the way his captain keeps on halting in the middle of his sentences seems a little odd. Shindou finds himself halting his movements, unable to keep himself from looking over at his young friend. It's not on purpose, but he's always believed in the worth of information, and something about the increasing tension in Tenma's voice raises his guard.

‘’Yes, I do understand, but is it really not possible?’’ The brunet in question is clutching his phone, lips pulled into a frown while his other hand holds on tightly to the edge of the bench. Whatever he's being told clearly affects him, and whatever reply he receives has his shoulders drooping visibly as he says, ‘’I know, but it was scheduled months ago…’’

It takes Shindou a second to classify the tone in Tenma's voice - not disappointed, but… resigned?

Whatever this conversation is that Tenma is now being forced to share with the entire team, it doesn't reassure Shindou in the slightest.

And it's clear he's not the only one. Although they're trying to hide it, the strategist notices several of his friends shooting worried glances at their captain, and the usual rambunctious chatter is muted. It’s by accident that Shindou and Tsurugi lock eyes over Tenma’s head, but it’s clear to both - they’re equally confused.

Tenma hasn’t hinted at any issue to either of them, and Shindou doesn’t quite know how to feel about that realization. He doesn’t mean to assume, but… well, as far as he knows, the brunet is an open book.

Especially to him and Tsurugi, or so Shindou had thought.

(Tenma respects him, he knows. It's clear the young brunet values his opinion, but he's also comfortable enough to approach Shindou with his issues and insecurities. To ask for help. To let himself be vulnerable.

Shindou appreciates that, could even say he's honored by the faith the brunet puts in him.

So to find out there's apparently something - a situation that seems to be the norm rather than the exception, based on Tenma's reaction - that has such an impact on the brunet, which he hasn't even hinted at towards Shindou nor Tsurugi…

Well, it throws him off more than he thought it would.)

The captain doesn't seem to have noticed the slowly increasing attention on him, too focused on whatever conversation he's having. One that's clearly not going well. “Are you certain?” he asks, sounding dull, and Shindou grimaces. That sounds very different from the Tenma he's used to, and it feels wrong.

‘’I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to complain.’’

That is…

Shindou has to look away from Tenma then. He can’t stand the sight of him so muted, so wrong, and he gets the feeling he is intruding on something he has no right to know about.

Instead he exchanges a look with Kirino next to him, the defender appearing just as startled as the strategist imagines he himself looks.

‘’Alright. I understand.’’ The words are mumbles but where they would otherwise have gone unheard, now the team has become silent enough for it to be picked up. ‘’Right. Goodbye, then.”

Tenma hangs up and drops his phone carelessly in his bag. Then he sighs softly, staring at the ground for several seconds before getting to his feet with the intent to get changed.

Shindou debates saying something, thoroughly unsettled because he's seen Tenma worried, sad and even angry a few times, but this… this is somehow worse. Clearly upset about something and yet shrugging it off completely at the same time. He's got no idea how to handle this new side of his friend, and he doesn't like it one bit.

He doesn’t seem to be the only one doubting themselves, something hesitant in the air as the team waits - for what, Shindou can’t quite tell. For Tenma to explain? The captain doesn’t even seem to notice their focus on him as he pulls off his suit jacket, but the strategist can’t help but wonder if that’s really the case. Either the brunet is so lost in his own thoughts he doesn’t notice the unusual quiet in the changing room, or he’s pretending.

It’s Tsurugi who breaks first, and Shindou feels a little relieved. Whatever issue Tenma may be facing, his guess is that he'll most easily open up to either Shinsuke, Tsurugi, or Shindou himself. He's never asked for the details but he knows Tenma and Tsurugi share a lot - Tsurugi about his brother and his time as a Seed, and Tenma about his insecurities.

“What was that all about?” the striker mumbles from the brunet’s other side, a quiet offer to talk about it.

Tenma stills in the midst of securing the captain's band around his arm.

He doesn't even look at his best friend and there's a sudden, horrid feeling of dread in the pit of Shindou's stomach that he doesn't know the origin of.

“Nothing to concern yourself with,” Tenma says evenly, and that's it. He goes back to changing like nothing happened. Like his team didn't just watch him act more cautious and restrained than he did while they traveled to the future.

He hadn't even hesitated.

Hadn't even seemed to consider talking to his team - and sure, that might not be considered odd if it were anyone else, but this is Raimon. They are arguably closer than any other team, after everything they've faced together. It's their whole thing, their never ending support of each other and their strong bonds, the reason they've made it this far, and if there's anyone who enforces that stereotype, it's Tenma.

And yet he hadn't even spared Tsurugi a single glance as he'd answered.

Shindou doesn't know what to think.

With the sudden, painful, and most importantly unusual sense of awkwardness in the air, Raimon finishes getting changed. Coach Endou shows up not long after, as bright and enthusiastic as he always is, and at least that manages to lighten the mood a little. He repeats their strategy once more, supported by Haruna refreshing the most important data on the Arakumo team, and the boys listen intently to his advice until he dismisses them with a few minutes to spare.

There's chatter in the changing room again, the excitement at the prospect of a match against a team as challenging as Arakumo resurfacing, and yet Shindou still finds himself watching his captain.

The brunet doesn't join in on any conversations, lips thin and shoulders still a bit tense.

He approaches Aoi.

The girl looks up from where she's preparing towels for the boys for later, her smile fading the moment she catches sight of him in favor of a frown. “Are you okay?” she asks.

Tenma mutely shakes his head, eyes downcast.

Aoi reaches out for him, catching him by the shoulder. She seems worried, but there's something in the way she approaches the brunet that seems to speak of experience.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Tenma, finally, cracks a smile. “Later,” he tells her. “Wanna join Aki-nee and I for dinner?”

The girl immediately brightens, both at the offer and the prospect of supporting her childhood friend. “I'd love to. I'll let my parents know, do I need to text Aki-san for you?”

“Please.”

The whole interaction speaks of familiarity and care. Shindou, objectively, knew they were friends, childhood friends. Knew they live in the same neighborhood, knew they hang out together often.

Knowing is different from seeing.

The way Aoi had immediately seen something was up, the way she'd known exactly how to react. How Tenma talks to her so easily when he'd seemed painfully uncomfortable with the team, had, in fact, approached her himself because he wanted to talk. The easy invitation for dinner, something they're apparently both so used to that they hadn't even considered that either Aoi's parents or Tenma's guardian could have any problem with the sudden change of plans.

There's a trust there. A trust that, until ten minutes ago, Shindou had believed to extend to the rest of the team.

As the two first-years keep talking, Tenma smiling once more, the strategist is suddenly struck with the feeling he just intruded on something private yet again. He turns away sharply.

And catches Tsurugi's gaze once more.

Seems like he wasn't the only one keeping an eye on Raimon's wayward captain - and from the frown pulling at Tsurugi's lips, it's clear the striker recognized the same thing he did.

Tsurugi is far too good at masking his emotions, but for once Shindou can make out the confusion - and dare he say the hurt - in his eyes.

Though neither of them says a word, there's a quiet understanding between them.

For all that Tenma seems to depend on them, in the span of a single phone call it has become painfully clear that there’s a boundary that neither of them had been aware of before.

And Shindou can’t help but wonder why that doesn’t surprise him as much as he thought it would.

------------

Okay, so I tried to include Taiyou like you asked, but he didn’t want to be written. Neither did Raimon really realize they ‘messed up’, as you said, rather it’s a slow suspicion creeping up on them. This is sort of the start of the process in which Raimon realizes, ‘oh, wait, something isn’t exactly right here’.

That’s also because I’ve got some more things planned for them. Tenma has issues, but he’s also not the person to acknowledge them, or blame Raimon for their actions - but it still bothers him unconsciously and I’m hoping to build on that. Rather than outright telling Raimon, or even showing there’s a problem, he’d prefer to ignore his own feelings on the matter. He’s just not the type of person to keep grudges or blame others.

And then there's the rest of the team to consider - there's other people who still have opinions on what happened at the start of the year, but simply haven't brought it up while they were dealing with evil organizations and time traveling. Midori, for example, won't stay silent forever, and she's certainly no fan of how Tenma and Shinsuke were treated in the beginning.

Also, that phone call is actually important, but in the AR timeline is also something Tenma only faces during the third-year, AKA two years from this point in time. Very slow-going, basically, which is again why this drabble doesn't really solve anything.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed (despite the long wait, sorry about that)!

[delopsia]

Not sure if you’ve answered this before…but who’s the most desperate for it when Bob gets back from deployment?

I feel like it’s Rhett and he’s an absolute menace until he gots Bob inside him. He teases and pushes bobs buttons until it happens, riding that fine line of getting denied for being so awful but Bob can’t resist. But after one orgasm each then Rhett gets punished while Bob takes care of reader but lets be honest, he was craving a punishment too.

I...done got carried away 😬 oops

A part of me is inclined to say that Bobby himself is the most desperate of the three; he's just not as vocal about it. For the past several months, Rhett and Reader have, at the very least, had each other to play with, but Bob? He's been crammed on a ship, in a tiny room full of people, and into an even tinier bunk bed.

The most intimate touch he's had came from his own rushed hand while in the shower, and the only thing he's seen of Reader and Rhett have been the occasional photos and videos that they've sent. Some erotic, some mundane, it's a true mix.

And maybe he'd get found out a little faster if Rhett wasn't so damn distracting. Leaning up from the back seat and letting his breath fan out against Bob's pale neck, pressing his palm to the small of Bob's back when they step through a door. He even slips into those cute, pastel pink shorts when they get home, long legs and thick thighs on perfect display, lounging in bed while Bob fusses with unpacking.

The Reader knew he was going to do this, not because Rhett Abbott is a predictable man (though he usually is), but because they jokingly orchestrated this several weeks before. And that's why they keep distracting Bob just enough to keep him from snapping on the spot, stringing him out until their dinner plans are over. It works so well that they reckon he might last through a movie or two.

But then Rhett mistakenly drops something and bends down at just the right angle to brush against Bobby's crotch, and Bob's patience shatters.

It wasn't even Rhett's intention to set him off. Not like that, at least, but it's hard to argue with being bent over the arm of the couch. Maybe Bobby finds a cute, heart-shaped plug when he yanks down those goddamned pastel shorts. Maybe there are lingering marks from when he and the Reader had a little fun before they headed to the airport.

Rhett's at his prettiest when he's being railed from behind. A hand tangled in his hair, forcing his head up, his arms trembling on either side of the Reader, hot breath on their chest, nothing but choked noises and mindless babbles. It's been so long since the Reader last watched his tongue loll out of his mouth, panting like a damn dog.

But the Reader has gone and incriminated themselves, and though there's a brief shower intermission, they find themselves bent over the kitchen sink. Head in Rhett's lap, feeling the way his hands roam across their naked back while Bobby pushes into them. A sharper pair of eyes might notice Bob's own poorly hidden desperation, but those aren't in the room right now. Too distracted by the Reader's whine and the soft smack of skin on skin.

It's not until morning that Rhett and Reader realize how damn bad Bob's got it. Hell, they're still snuggled together, blinking away the sleepiness in their eyes when a faint squelch catches their ears. Bobby, in his own little world, carefully fucking himself on his own fingers.

Those cheeks twinge with pink when he opens his eyes to find an audience, but shame is something he hasn't known in years. Rhett's sore, and the Reader isn't in the mood to fight with that strap-on, but it's hard to resist digging out Bob's favorite toy. Snuggling up on either side of him, taking turns slowly fucking him with it. But that's not enough either.

And it's a good thing that everyone took time off because it takes a damn week to wring him dry. Even then, Rhett reckons Bob might jump his bones every time he slips into those tiny little shorts.

[tiny-smallest]

Sonic Movie Universe prediction: Robotnik is an orphan because of GUN

I think what was supposed to be, tonally, a silly throwaway line is actually winding up to punch us in the face later.

Bear with me.

I barely remember the first movie since it was so long since I watched it, but aside from one, maybe two, of the comic universes, this line is the first time we have ever gotten anything at all about Ivo Robotnik's personal backstory. And it's that he's an orphan. In a story series that explicitly sets him up with a human identity- none of that Eggman stuff as his identity, not even a whisper of the name until it's a silly insult Sonic throws out later- this movie bothers to give him a Normal Human Society Firstname Lastname and a job.

(Okay, so Robotnik isn't exactly a normal human surname. But it's established canon that is the family name so. Suspension of disbelief.)

A series that we know will later delve, at least a little, into the story of Professor Gerald Robotnik WHO IVO APPARENTLY, ACTUALLY, DEFINITELY KNEW IN THIS CONTINUITY, AS HE HAS A SPECIFIC GRANDPA NAME FOR HIM AND NEARLY CRIES.

The original line was a ridiculous rebuttal to Tom during the fight in the house during the first movie. "Rub that in my orphan face," he says in response to Tom sharing a detail of his childhood during Silly Action Scene Banter. While there is a sort of tension there since the movie universe makes no bones about Sonic being an actual child and he is confirmed to be an alien, thus making the danger present of government capture and experimentation very real and kind of horrific, the scene as it plays out isn't overly out of character for something you'd expect in a Sonic movie. And although Robotnik is the threat here, he plays a large part in also keeping the scene lighthearted because of how utterly he fails to respond like a normal human being to literally anything. The comment about being an orphan at least makes sense based on what Tom said, but it's still weirdly personal and, therefore, kind of inappropriate to say. Like dude back up you're trying to kill a child why are you sharing your trauma with me that's uncomfortable.

Which brings me to the obvious point of that line- it's not just to make the scene funny, it's to show us how set apart from other humans Robotnik is. This is a man who has no idea how to interact with anyone, like, absolutely nobody, and every single scene he's in reminds us of this, including this one.

Now that the third movie has explicitly drawn a line between Shadow's backstory and themes of pain and loss, and we see Gerald Robotnik weeping over what I think is Maria's body in the aftermath of the murder (jesus that's dark) I have to connect a few dots of my own.

The first movie had another piece of foreshadowing they threw at us, this one way more obvious: at the end of the first movie, a government agent is sent to speak with the Wachowski couple. He tells them that Ivo Robotnik has been thoroughly erased from existence. As far as any documentation of him ever existing on Planet Earth, there is none. He hasn't merely disappeared- it's like he never was.

If they did this to Ivo after this catastrophe it's not a stretch to think they did the same with Professor Gerald. Hell, I thought that after movie number one. "That has to come up later- we have a character the government explicitly turns on in this series. Like, as a major plot point. The defining moment in several characters' stories. No way does their ability to erase someone not come up later."

But now I think they went a step further.

They've already murdered a little girl and broken an old man in their efforts to contain the genius they were frightened of.

Personally, I don't think it's a stretch to think that Ivo Robotnik, very young himself at the time most likely, is an orphan because GUN decided to eradicate the entire family line in an effort to prevent anyone like Gerald Robotnik from ever existing again.

Except. The son survived. Well shit. Uh. Stick him in an orphanage and keep an eye on him, I guess.

And where does he end up as a adult? A branch of the government. Where they can keep an eye on him.

(More than that, if they did erase Gerald, Ivo clearly remembers him... so Ivo may have joined them specifically to look for traces of the grandfather he knows existed and who doesn't seem to have any records proving that whatsoever. But that's Ivo's motivations and we're talking about GUN's, so, moving on.)

It's likely based on his sheer intellect, assuming Ivo wasn't embellishing too heavily, that he didn't have to grow for very long before that brilliance was obvious. Though the government's decision to let him live was strategic, weighing the gamble of assassination with the gamble of him inheriting the genius and deciding that risking him having the same genius as his grandfather was better than trying to kill him at this point, the gambit ultimately failed. Even though he was more than likely still only a child, they'd let him live too long. In just a few short years he quickly became a very real threat to the government- as in, if given a reason, he could be a very real threat. And nothing Ivo does is ever subtle or quiet, so his genius was probably very loud, and there was likely lots of attention, making an assassination impossible, because if there would be too many questions before, there would be an insurmountable amount if he died or disappeared now.

So, since they couldn't kill him, they continued to keep an eye on him and took him on at the government when he was old enough with the intention of keeping their enemies closer. Except all of their caution still wasn't enough and he went rogue the first time he was presented with the opportunity to grab at power they didn't already have, power capable of things beyond their wildest imaginations- a monster of their own making.

Ivo, who never asked for what happened to him, very likely a victim of circumstances he had no hope of ever controlling, who responded to this trauma by making his choice that power mattered more than anything- more than morals, more than hurting people who are just like he was once. That shaping his own world after all the horrors he planned to do in pursuit of that may finally, finally "be enough."

(Be enough for what, exactly, Ivo. You never did explain that. "Who knows? Maybe that will be enough." Elaborate.)

Whether he knew the truth about why he had suffered or not, Robotnik made his choices. He stood at that crossroads that demanded he make a choice about what kind of person he was going to be in the face of all the pain and loss, and he made his choice. This movie is about Shadow making his.

If this movie really wants to beat us all to death it won't just draw comparisons between Sonic and Shadow, but Shadow and Ivo Robotnik.

(If this movie wants to exorcize our souls after we're dead, if it intends to be a trilogy and not make more movies in following the original vision for Sonic Adventure 2, it'll place Ivo at a new crossroads, and this time, he'll make a different choice.)

(Especially since Professor Gerald, in a much worse state of madness and malice than Ivo, who the movie is setting up specifically as someone Ivo loves, admires, and almost certainly misses, probably won't.)

[blueberryarchive]

sweet revengeೀ⋆⑅˚

So, surprise, it's the weekend and you've already finished all your uni exams. Guess who calls you to tell you that you won't have a partner for spring break? You don't want to admit that you've cried, or that you've let yourself rot for two days in your bed dressed in shades of pink, vanilla ice cream on your nightstand, a CD with every Monroe movie you love.

And the worst of all is that you don't have an explanation, he just said that he needed to be away from you, that you were a bad influence. The position that your daddy had offered him wasn't enough to have him by your side?

You had several ideas about what happened: maybe Jonah, his childhood friend, who you fucked that night at the Christina Aguilera concert. Or maybe the time you kissed his older sister at your sleepover (you were both drunk and it was only because you were playing spin the bottle). Or maybe that time... or maybe when...

Or maybe it was Jimin.

Your cell phone rang with that Britney Spears song you had downloaded. Your long, pink nails hit the green button, listening to your best friend's scream on the other end of the line, you wrinkled your nose in discomfort.

"Bunny, I'm waiting for you in front of Heaven and Hell, are you inside?. I know the DJ and he can let us into the VIP area." He screamed, his friends making obscene sounds behind his back so you could hear them.

"Minnie, I want to die." You mumbled into your pillows.

"What?!"

"It's Marcus, he told me that he doesn't want to be with me anymore." You sobbed, lifting your head to see yourself crying in the mirror on your wall. "Am I ugly? Do you think he found someone prettier, Minnie?"

"That's impossible, Bunny. You're the hottest girl in all of New York."

You sighed, maybe it's true. It is impossible.

"Wait, don't tell me you've been crying over Premature Marcus." The laughter of Jimin and his friends echoed in your ear.

"No, of course not. Don't call him that."

Marcus had a little problem that you told Jimin about with great confidence, he was your best friend, after all, and now he kept calling him Premature Marcus. You didn't blame your ex, you were a hottie; Jimin was the only one who could last hours fucking you without losing stamina.

Jimin cleared his throat and whispered into his phone.

"Do you still have that sequin dress? The one you wore to Yoongi's party."

"The Baby Phat one?" Your eyes lit up thinking about that dress, your daddy had sent it to you for your birthday, it was beautiful.

"Yes, Baby Phat, that's what I said. Wait for me with it on, okay, Bunny? Maybe the gold necklace with your initial on it, the one that I gave you."

You nodded, wiping the tears from your face.

"Don't last too long."

"No, Bunny. I already got in the car."

You smiled. You knew you could count on your best friend for anything. Visiting that store was the best decision you made.

The clicking of your heels, long legs circling near the fountain in front of your house. You checked your phone for the third time, Jimin said it wouldn't take long but it had already been more than ten minutes and you weren't one to wait.

A black car stopped in front of your house, you frowned because it wasn't Jimin's, it wasn't very elegant either so you were surprised when the passenger window was lowered and there was Jimin: his hair dyed pink (something you had done a night when you were bored and he didn't refuse), a baggy hoodie and a lollipop on his fleshy lips.

"Hello, Princess." He smiled, eyes scanning your glorious body.

"Heaven and Hell must be full at this time. We should go to Enigma, maybe I'll meet some paparazzi." You smiled widely, excited at the idea.

"You don't have to go to a club today."

You rolled your eyes. Boring.

You saw a head emerge from the darkness of the steering wheel, it was Jungkook, Jimin's roommate. Jungkook was from the New York alternative scene: spiked choker, lots of piercings, and homemade tattoos. That was the reason there was a screeching metal sound in the car. When he saw you he smiled evilly.

"You look cute today, Bubblegum."

"What are we supposed to do when I'm dressed like this?" You unintentionally ignored Jeon, whining.

It's not like you were going to go on a date with both of them, although you weren't entirely opposed to the idea.

“Get in the car,” Jimin tilted his head, and you obeyed.

The path was familiar, very, but you didn't ask until you were in front of Marcus's house.

"Damn, this house is huge." Jungkook turned down the music, looking at the two floors of your ex's modern house. The entrance illuminated as if it were the MoMA.

"Wait for me here." Jimin walked out, leaving you with questions in your mouth. His hand extended into the car, Jungkook handed him a compact black container before walking away around one of the corners and disappearing; shoulders tense and hands inside the hoodie that was twice his size.

"Is he like...going to spray his car or something?" You asked trying to fill the silence, Jungkook just chuckled seeing you in the reflection of the rearview mirror.

"Something like that, Bubblegum." Jungkook took a cigarette out of his pocket and passed it. You took it and waited with him until Jimin gave a signal.

A few minutes later, Jimin opened the front door with a Machiavellian smile, his hoodie was wet as was his hair. He took out his cell phone and seconds later yours vibrated.

JM: I'll wait for you in the main room.

"You can come down now, don't be gone for long" Jungkook assured you.

"What if someone comes?"

"I'll run away, do you think I'm going to save you guys? You immature fucks." Smoke came out of his pierced nose with a chuckle.

You got out of the car fixing your dress, your heart beating impatiently and confused beneath the golden necklace. You had rarely entered that house, none of them were experiences worth mentioning.

You entered through the wide double doors, the smell of sandalwood filling your space, even stronger than your Viva La Juicy.

That Britney song again, you picked up the phone.

"Jimin, where are you?" You whispered, looking around the halls in case someone appeared out of nowhere.

"I told you that in the main room, you dumb bunny." His honeyed voice made you stop your steps, and you rested your hand on the wall.

"Are you like...going to spray his car or something?"

"Um," Jimin hummed and then responded, "I don't see any cars in this room."

You laughed nervously, walking slowly up the stairs.

"Do you know what is here?"

"No."

"A California King bed, fresh sheets, and your best friend's shoulder so you can cry over your breakup. Legs and heart open."

You swallowed slowly. You really wanted to cry, how would you spend spring break without a boyfriend? Who would take you as a co-pilot in his Benz? Who would you model your bikinis for? It was so sad.

The call dropped just as you entered the room. Jimin's cargo dampened the fresh sheets laid out on the bed, his hair covering part of his eyes. His gaze focused on your walk and he bit his lip in a smile.

"Jungkook is right. You do look cute today, Bunny."

"Mm," You couldn't think about anything other than the bulge marked on his pants, just below the zipper until it ended on the side of his thigh, saliva pooling in your mouth. "Why are you wet?"

"Fell in the pool trying to enter the house."

Both laughed before intensely gazing at each other.

"Come here." Your best friend murmured and you gently approached until you were sitting on his lap that he was pointing to, you placed your head on his wet shoulder and the cold of his damp clothes made your skin crawl.

"I don't understand what I did wrong, Minnie."

"Me neither." His cold hand began to caress your hair, and you closed your eyes appreciating the treatment. The smell of the cherry lollipop in his mouth. "You're a good girl, even to those who don't deserve it."

You pouted and Jimin couldn't take it, leaving a chaste kiss on your lips. His fingers dug into your hair until he squeezed it and raised your head so you could look at him, surprised to see how Jimin's other hand held a camcorder pointing at your face.

"Look at me," Jimin demanded through gritted teeth. His pupils dilated to the point of losing yourself in that dark well. "Do you remember the time you told me you wanted to be a porn star for a day?" His voice was like a constant rumble, the ones its frequency were only felt by your heart and your pussy.

You nodded, one of those confessions you knew were stupid.

"Do you want to show your shitty ex how good you'd be if you did?"

You nodded, Jimin tightening his grip on your hair, the pain making your temples hurt.

"Answer, you're a big girl."

"Uh-huh."

"Uh-huh, what?"

"Yes, Minnie." You bit your bottom lip looking into his eyes, his cheekbones jutting into a smile.

"Yes, I'm your Minnie." You purred into his lips as he collided with yours again. The lens of the device became part of the nebula that separated you and Jimin from everything else.

You opened your eyes to see how Jimin kept looking at the camera.

"Stand up, come on."

Jimin put the camera on the nightstand so he could see your entire body and stood right behind you. His invasive hands went to your breasts, massaging roughly. His lips rested on your neck, licking until he reached your ear.

Your hands held his on your chest. You were so weak when it came to him, he was so rough with you and you felt like you were always on the verge of breaking down in his arms. Strangely, that turned you on, so it was no surprise that the inside of your thighs felt hot to the touch.

"This is what I wanted to do that time you went to Yoongi's party, bringing your little boyfriend to make me jealous," Jimin whispered, lifting the dress just enough to reveal that you weren't wearing any underwear underneath it. A hiss from him.

"But you're my best friend."

"Best friends need attention too, baby bunny."

His fingers wandered until they reached the inside of your thighs, two curved fingers rubbing your clit.

"Why are you shaking?" His teasing plus the piercing of his tongue in your ear made a trickle run from your entrance to Jimin's wrist. "Dirty Bunny, I adore how sensitive you get with me."

"Only you." Your voice cracked as both fingers scissored inside you.

"I know."

His forearm anchored around your waist, bringing you closer to the camera.

"On all fours." A spank echoed off the sober walls of Marcus' room. You squealed, giggling as you reached your favorite part.

Jimin pointed the camera at your back, the dress bunching at your waist. His fingers traced the tattoo on your lower back.

"Why are you so sexy? It's not fucking fair."

"Give to me." You murmured, snatching the camera from Jimin's hands to record both of you, on the soft bed you left the device before Jimin choked you with his forearm to get you closer to his body.

His cock entered as if it had been custom-made for him. Designer pussy.

His head rested on your shoulder, and he smiled slyly along with your goofy smile. Each crash against your pussy sending shivers down your spine, your nipples hard in the air.

Jimin takes one last lick of his lollipop, the metal tangling in the cherry flavor. "Open wide, bitch."

With a smile you stuck out your tongue, letting Jimin pass the lollipop over your lips, smearing your lipstick.

The video ends in static. Too bad Jungkook didn't charge the camera before sweet revenge.

if you want more from y2k minnie x bunny:

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚. and ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

p.s: @hoseokshobagi thank u for the excuse so I could post it tonight

[cellarspider]

11/30: Full steam ahead

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We return to Body Desecrator 2093, Prometheus. There were no post this weekend because I felt like it. Now I feel like it even less, because it’s this scene.

The horrors do not end here. The movie hasn’t even got to what it considers horrors, but I’d already screamed quietly at the screen by this point several times, so it’s safe to say that me and the movie were not simpatico.

There are times when a movie will do things that fall entirely outside your personal beliefs or understanding of logic, and you just roll with it. Magical realism does this all the time, as do movies reaching for the psychedelic. 2001: A Space Odyssey eventually dissolves reality itself around the protagonist as he travels through another dimension. On the first sit, you have no way of knowing what you’ll be shown next, but if the movie’s got you, then you go with it.

Then there are movies where everyone is acting according to some sort of logic, but it feels twisted, like things are happening for a reason, but the logic doesn’t connect. Horror movies love this, particularly ones with cultic antagonists–Midsommar being the most notable modern example, and the original Wicker Man being another.

I mean, the Nick Cage movie also has that, but sometimes it has that because Nick Cage is in a bear costume, punching a woman in the face and stealing bicycles at gunpoint like he’s in GTA.

Prometheus, unfortunately, unintentionally places itself somewhere between the two Wicker Men. The characters’ decision making is a shambolic mess. The movie intentionally invokes religious fervor in Shaw especially, and might intentionally invoke that plus megalomania in Holloway, but it doesn’t draw a line around those characters and their bad decisions. Everyone is just going with their bullshit. This suggests to the audience that in the movie’s world all scientists behave like this.

I mean, in our world, scientists sometimes try to fit entire oranges in their mouths (source), but I should like to think that The Orange Incident wouldn’t have happened if that guy had been on board the most important scientific expedition in human history.

Things just kept happening in this movie that made me feel like I was dissociating. The cast is back at the Prometheus, with their stolen artifacts and mortal remains. Cool. They need to be decontaminated. Like, inside and out.

Next, we see Shaw and Holloway in a lab, along with Maybe-Chemist-Lady whose name fell right out of my head as I watched, because she’s never given a character to speak of. They are wearing scrubs, hairnets, and blue surgical masks, which tells me the movie thinks this is appropriate personal protective equipment for handling an alien head. Holloway is sitting on a counter in the corner, getting drunk.

So many things have just hit me here. How long is this since they got back? Apparently no more than a couple hours. These people took their helmets off in an active alien biosphere, with worms in the dirt and an alien corpse on the ground and who knows what else. They should be quarantined forever, or at least for a couple weeks. 

When the Apollo 11 crew got back to Earth, they were quarantined for 21 days. NASA didn’t consider it likely that anything lived on the moon, but they were taking no chances. Here’s Nixon getting a chance to see what good people look like!

But no! No quarantine for Prometheus! The guys who breathed moon dust? Into the quarantine trailer. The people who stuck their faces near an alien corpse? Nah! It’s all good!

What about the head they looted from the structure? These people already got a dramatic reminder that altering the conditions around sensitive artifacts can cause them to degrade. I’ve already rambled at length about how NASA still sterilizes their equipment to not contaminate anywhere probes are sent to. Hell, as a geneticist, I can tell you that there is a very strict hierarchy of sample isolation and biosafety deployed when it’s appropriate–either you work fucking hard to protect the samples from you, or you work hard to protect yourself from the sample. 

But the crew of the Prometheus have scanned the head with a little light and declared “Sample is sterile. No contagion present”, which is an odd thing to declare now, after they already breathed all over it. Trusting their all-knowing (and wrong) computer, they take their surgical masks off. Fully sealed suits? A glovebox? Even movies show people using a glovebox sometimes!

NOPE! HAIRNETS AND A LABCOAT, LET’S GO

Do we kick out Shaw’s boyfriend who’s in his casual clothes? NAH, LET THE MAN BE COMFY. Are we going to pry the bottle away from him, because bringing drinks into a lab breaks basic safety standards? Standards that I’ve only ever seen broken by one place that also allowed open-toe sandals in a lab where boiling hot gel and mutagenic chemicals were regularly mixed? NOPE, LET HIM HAVE HIS BOOZE, HE’S SAD HE DIDN’T GET TO MEET GOD.

Don’t worry, that one lab doesn’t do the sandal thing anymore. And Holloway will pay for his crimes against laboratory safety.

But I can't stress enough how utterly uncanny this scene felt, unintentionally on the part of the movie. Every decision felt wrong. Everything everyone was doing, saying, and wearing was wrong. They’re not even wearing the right kind of gloves! They should at minimum be wearing nitrile gloves! They’re wearing PVC gloves, which have stupid high leakage rates, even if you double-glove! They’re not even more comfortable than nitrile gloves! This is my nittest of picks, I know! I’m doing it anyway!

The movie had lost me, but part of me was still hoping it would come back around, that something in it would be the movie I’d thought it would be.

Next time: the movie will not do that, and I will, paradoxically, find myself in more of the frame of mind the movie seems to want from the audience: not giving a shit about its characters. 

Stay tuned for some bonus workplace hazards below the citations.

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1. https://youtu.be/P1gn06np-7g  2. https://youtu.be/KhRo2WbWnKU?t=35 3. https://youtu.be/JjCh7lTVNwo  4. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Airstream#Space_program  5. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Astronaut_transfer_van  6. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Umarell  7. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Upgrade_(film)#Production

Alright, let’s behold some images from my institute’s safety training module on compressed gas cylinders. Please note, these were not taken at my institute, these are probably the result of the team finding cursed images they wanted to inflict on their coworkers and us.

This was how they chose to communicate the idea of “don’t let canisters heat up, or they might explode”. How else might they explode? If the canister becomes old and corroded, develops any other sort of fault, or is stored improperly, especially near cylinders of other kinds. Like so!

This is the least bombastic of the images, but it exudes a quiet menace and/or the promise that Video Game Physics are imminent.

What do I mean by Video Game Physics? Glad you asked!

Terrifying yet also compelling! Finally, here’s a video from that most terrifying of places, a Russian highway.

Video description, which I realize I haven’t been doing up to this point and now I want to: A GazpromTech company truck carrying unsecured acetylene tanks passes a motorist on a separated highway at high speed. On the side of it, “ОГНЕОПАСНО” (“FLAMMABLE”) is briefly visible as it rockets by. It makes no to minimal attempt to slow down as a bus enters its lane, rear-ending it. The viewpoint car skids to a stop, and what might be the truck driver can be seen sprinting toward the central barrier of the highway. “Scream & Shout” by will.i.am and Britney Spears can be heard playing on the radio as the viewpoint car tries to back away, complete with an audible “Britney, bitch”. At 0:54 the view cuts to a camera on the other side of the highway, which one commenter estimated as being 200 m away based on the delay between explosions and the sound of the blast reaching the camera. 

There are, in fact, MANY explosions from the fireball that has engulfed the truck. A semi tanker is being guided backward away from the explosion, while a blue box truck does the same. A silver sedan, briefly visible in the first angle, is parked within under 50 feet of the truck. Its apparent owner is dithering on whether to try and reach it, eventually deciding, as they should, that this is not worth it. The cameraperson, on the other hand, apparently thinks this is worth it, as do several others in the other lane. 

One man is filming on a tablet. Multiple times, canisters and truck shrapnel can be seen rocketing off from the wreck to distances that make it clear everybody in shot is well within decapitation range from these things, especially as explosions fling more burning cylinders onto the roadway. At 1:45, Tablet Man gets the fuck out of there, but our self preservation-less cameraperson remains. At 2:14, a flaming canister in blown clear of the wreck and lands with its bottom end pointing directly toward the cameraperson, who still does not take the hint. Starting at 2:37, the body of the truck is blasted apart, a canister goes flying off past the camera, and a piece of the truck flips and lands on a nearby road sign. 

At 3:32 another cut happens and there are more people standing in view of the camera. Are they official emergency crew? Nope! Rubberneckers, although the cop car that’s even closer than them gets a wakeup call when a canister slams into the divider in front of it and tumbles away, still spitting gas. The cop backs up, and the video ends.

End description. Also, end post.

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[spicywhenspeaking]

Star-Crossed Connection: chapter two

Nick Folio x Original Female Character

WC: 3k

masterpost

this is a complete work of fiction, some characters while based on real people are totally made up. :)

Seraphina Holloway is Hollywood’s new it girl. But, when an embarrassing viral video of her ex / costar publicly dumping her goes viral, she thinks she needs a quick fix to help maintain her image. When she’s set to appear at her new movies premier she scrambles to find a date to bring that will help take the white hot spotlight away from her public dumping and show that she’s still desirable to all. Enter Nick Folio, drummer of the metalcore band that’s taking over the scene, Bad Omens. He’s a sweet down to earth guy with a heart of gold and when a smokin hot movie star asks him to be her fake boyfriend for a week he agrees to help. But will the line between fake feelings and reals ones start to blur when Seraphina lets her true self show.

Taglist: @cookiesupplier @lma1986 @to-be-written @bngurngheart @jessicafg03 @knivesforapr0 @thatchickwiththecamera @somewhere-diamond @sorrowsofsilence @malerieee @dsireland86 @collapsedglasshouses @jilliemiw86 @samanthasgone -> tags are open !

A few days later I’m finalizing my festival outfits with my stylist. The photos the paparazzi took were splashed all over the tabloids and drama blogs the day after they found Folio and I were ambushed on our date. 

My plan worked like a charm. Every article or blog post was gushing over me and my newfound love. It was almost too easy to sway the public perception. All it took was a few perfectly timed photos of a new hot guy shielding me from the onslaught of flashes and pestering questions from pathetic men who have nothing better to do than follow girls like me around day and night trying to get a million-dollar photo. 

Looking into the 360 mirror I admire the beautiful black one-strapped ball gown my stylist picked out for the movie premiere. “It’s lovely, this was an amazing find, Lala. Did you find any cute stuff for skiing?” Lala smiles and pulls out another rack of clothes with several snowsuits in all different colors. I decide to try on the pink one and the all-white one. 

“I’ll take both of these they’re so hot, so all that’s left is a few choices for the press junket and I’ll look through some of the options you brought for my date.” I move to look through the outfits she’s picked out for folio and choose a black Armani tux and full black snowsuit along with some jewelry that one of my brand deals has sent. “These are perfect, he is going to look so hot,” I say finishing up and choosing a few more accessories from the table. I grab several rings, necklaces and a few different bags. “So things are getting serious between you and this new guy?” Lala asks and I put on my sweetest lovesick smile, “Oh yeah, he’s great. The perfect guy for me. Nothing like the egomaniac actors I usually date. He’s so real.” I answer, fighting the internal ripple of shame that overwhelms me. Folio and I have been texting back and forth since our paparazzi fiasco and he really is a nice guy. I’m a massive asshole for using him like this but it’s just a week and then I can say something about how it was a mutual decision because both of our careers are so hectic. 

Just then my phone pings with a new message 

Nicky F 🏍️❤️‍🔥: TMZ is blowing up my phone about those pics, what should I say?

Seraphina 👑: you can tell them no comment. Or ignore it, it’s up to you! I’m sorry they’re bothering you, I figured they would just bombard me. 

Nicky F 🏍️❤️‍🔥: No worries sweetheart, you can’t control the crazies that follow you around. 

Damn, I fucking suck. I should just be honest with him. It’ll definitely make it easier if he’s in on my plan. 

Well, I’ll explain it all on the plane when we leave in a couple of days and if he decides just to turn around and go back home I will totally understand. It’ll totally ruin my plan and I’ll look even more of a loser but I can’t just keep lying to him about everything. 

I don’t have any plans for the rest of the day so I decide to head home and rot on my couch. While I’m rewatching Gossip Girl for the millionth time on my couch I get a surprising call from a certain motorcycle-driving drummer. I answer it and am surprised by the smile that spreads across my face at the idea of talking to him. 

Hey Folio! 

Hey sweetheart are you busy? 

Um no, just watching TV what’s up?

Are you up for a ride up the coast to watch the sunset? I know a place.

That sounds great! I can be ready in 20. I’ll text you my address. 

Okay, I’ll head over soon. 

Okay! Bye!

Alright, looking forward to it sweetheart. 

Thirty minutes later I hear the hum of a motorcycle from outside and get a text from Folio that he just pulled up. I run out of my front door wearing my black levis with a plain white tee under my cropped black hoodie. “Hey!” I call out over the sound of the motor. “Hey!” he responds quickly hopping off the bike to wrap his arms around me in a quick hug. “You ready to get out of here?” he asks and I nod enthusiastically “Yes, I’m excited!” 

He climbs back over and I throw my leg over the side behind him and wrap my arms around his waist as he starts up the bike again. “Hold on tight sweetheart” he drawls out as he turns out of the driveway and down the road. 

“I’m taking you to a spot near Malibu that’s beautiful at sunset,” he says over the sound of the roaring motor. 

It takes over an hour to get to the beach, the sun is low but there are still maybe 10 minutes left before it’s fully set. We park and Folio grabs a blanket from a storage trunk on the side of his bike. We walk hand-in-hand to a spot with little foot traffic. He unfolds it, it’s thick, hand-woven, and dark red. It’s large and looks big enough for us to both sit comfortably off of the sand. He spreads it out on the ground so we can sit and watch the sun take its last moments before dipping below the horizon. 

“So, Phi, can I call you Phi?” he asks softly as his gaze slides from the sunset to me. I nod softly as he continues, the orange light of the sun covering him in a warm glow. “so Phi, I want to help you with this whole festival thing, but can you give me some information about what I might expect? Will the paparazzi be around every corner? Or is that only when you give them a heads up where you’ll be?”  

I try and fail to hide the embarrassment and shock that’s written all over my face. “What- what do you mean? Heads up? What do you even mean?- I” his unamused face is all it takes for me to drop the act. I had said to myself I wanted to be honest with him but I guess I didn’t anticipate getting caught. “I’m sorry,” I say with a sigh, “how did you know?”

He laughs softly and tosses a rock he found on the other side of the blanket towards the crashing waves. “I had a hunch, and a photographer friend of mine may have given me a heads up.” He arches a brow at me, waiting for my reply.

“I was going to tell you, I swear. I know that doesn’t mean anything now but-“ I look up as the sun finally disappears, leaving the sky a beautiful orange and pink. “I didn’t want to keep lying to you. I know we’re practically strangers and for some reason, you’ve agreed to help me with this absurd plan, but from now on I promise I will keep you informed on all of the things I can control” I turn to face him, prepared for him to either tell me the plan is off or by some miracle bless me with forgiveness. 

“You know, we could’ve given them way more of a show if I had known” he laughs and the tension I was holding between my shoulders drops. “I don’t really understand your world or how it works but if you teach me I’m happy to play along,” he says and it feels so sincere, I almost wish this was real, but he’s right, he’s just playing along. 

“I think I’ve just let this whole situation get to me too much, I mean look at me, asking some stranger to pretend to be my boyfriend because I’m too--well, it doesn’t matter. I just, all I’ve ever wanted was to act and my parents did everything to help me get to this point. I can’t help but think of how ashamed my dad would be to see me now” 

Folio bumps lightly into my shoulder before throwing his arm around me and pulling me closer into his side. “Strangers? I don’t think so, but there’s definitely more I want to learn about you Phi. I don’t think he’d be ashamed at all.”  He says as he rests his head on the top of mine while we watch the final colors of the day disappear and the darkness of night blanket the sky. “What are you doing tomorrow?” 

“Just final packing for the trip, didn’t have much of anything planned,” I answer. 

He takes a moment to think before he speaks again, “What if instead of flying to Colorado we rent a car and drive to Colorado together? It’s only a 14-hour drive. It will give us time to get to know each other better and since it’s a rental we can just fly home at the end of the week. What do you think?” He asks gaze still fixed on the horizon. 

Humming in thought I consider his proposition. “You want to road trip to Colorado? I guess I could get a last-minute rental, we’d need to leave tomorrow though, you can be prepared for that?”

He huffs out a laugh, “Yeah, I can pack pretty fast.” I laugh as well at the absurdity of the way this is all turning out. But it sounds like it will be a fun adventure. We spend a bit longer on the beach making idle conversation. I was able to work out a rather quick rental agreement thanks to my brand deal with Hertz and I sent a quick text to my assistant that I would be traveling up a day early. She and my glam team are going to meet us at the resort. “Well, your spontaneity has worked out in our favor. I have the car teed up to be sent to my house at 7 am. I can pick you up after and we can head out.” He excitedly agrees to the plans and even offers to just meet at my house, as long as he can park his bike there while we are gone. 

After Folio drops me off later that evening I rush around to pack a quick bag. Jules, my assistant, has already arranged for my clothes to be sent to my hotel room at the festival so I just need to pack a few essentials into my suitcase, my daily makeup and toiletries along with my loungewear and casual clothes. It’s already late and I’m exhausted by the time my head hits the pillow so sleep overtakes me quickly.

I’m awoken by the sound of my alarm going off at 6:30 am and I find myself feeling excited about the prospects of the day despite the early hour, especially after getting way less sleep than usual. No worries though, nothing a little coffee can’t fix. I throw on a comfortable outfit for a long car ride and begin making my first coffee of the day. Around 6:50 am I received the text that the car was here so I run out to accept the key and sign the final paperwork. 

“Oh shit! You’re Seraphina Holloway! I’m a huge fan, your show on MTV was amazing! I can’t believe they canceled it!” the guy who dropped off the car said with a huge smile spread across his face. “Haha thank you! I loved being on that show it was such a fun time! I’m glad you liked it!” I reply. He leaves with a giddy smile and waves excitedly as he pulls away in the car that followed him in with the rental. I ended up with a black 2024 Chevy Tahoe and it looks so cool. 

I am bringing out my bag to load into the trunk when I hear the rumble of Folio’s bike coming up the road as he turns the corner up my driveway I can’t help the goofy smile I give him, I almost feel self-conscious about how happy I am to see him until he whips his helmet off and is wearing a matching smile of his own. “Mornin’ Phi, how are ya feeling?” he asks while hanging his helmet off of the handles of his bike. He walks over to wraps his arms around me in a big hug. “Hey Nicky, I’m feeling great! I’m excited about the road trip. How are you?”

He sides my bag onto his shoulder and gestures for me to unlock the trunk. “I’m feeling great sweetheart. I’m excited as well! I hope you’re prepared for a killer playlist.” 

“Oh you’re on! We will see who’s musical prowess puts who on top.” I jokingly tease. He laughs and puts the rest of his things in the car along with my bag. 

I invite him inside while I finish locking up, I offer Folio a coffee and he accepts thankfully. “Oh my god yes please, my roommates drank the last of the creamer and I cannot drink black coffee.” I laugh as I make us two fresh vanilla iced lattes for the road.

Heading towards the car I offer to drive the first leg. Nicky tried to offer to drive the whole thing but I can’t allow that. Plus splitting it up will help it go by faster. 

“Alright! Let’s hit the road, Nicky! Next stop Colorado baby!!!” I pump my fists in celebration and before I can feel the embarrassment of the action take over he’s pumping his fists as well “WooHoo! Hell yeah! Lets gooo!” he calls out and I can’t help the joyus laugh that takes over as we back out and talk off down the road. My phone is connected to the carplay so I have control over the first music rotation. “Alright, this is my time to shine. For your consideration.” I say before hitting shuffle on my road trip playlist.

It starts off with playing Panama by Van Halen. “oh shit! Starting it off strong with Van Halen. You are more than meets the eye Hollywood.” 

I laugh with my whole body, “Not what you expected huh? My dad used to quiz me on car rides, I was raised on classic rock.” 

jump back, what's that sound ? 

Here she comes, full blast and top down. 

Hot shoe, burnin' down the avenue. 

Model citizen zero discipline 

Don't you know she's coming home with me? 

You'l lose her in the turn. 

I'll get her!

“Panama, Panama Panama, Panama Ain't nothin' like it, her shiny machine. Got the feel for the wheel, keep the moving parts clean.” we sing along together. 

When the song finishes and “Go Your Own Way” starts next. “So I found this list of questions to get to know each other better on the road,” Folio says. “So, starting off easy, what are your three favorite movies?” 

“Oh crap, oh my god? Easy?? Okay….three favorite movies are Pride and Prejudice from 2005, Pacific Rim but NOT the sequel and oh god, um I’ll say Secret World of Arrietty, which is a Studio Ghibli. What about you?” I ask.

“Okay I love Pacific Rim so I trust you and will be watching the other that you mentioned. I like Star Wars Empire Strikes Back, Kill Bill, and the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre.” 

“I love horror movies! And omg okay nerd of course you would say the name of the episode instead of just Star Wars.” I joke and he laughs. “alright alright, it’s an important distinction. Real fans know what’s up. Okay, next question, what is your favorite photo?”

I think for a moment about all the pictures I’ve ever taken and am hit with a beautiful memory, “there was a summer my family took a vacation to the Florida coast and my cousins and I started a sand castle competition. I built a huge three-story sand mansion. My dad helped me get the towers just right. My mom took a picture of us right as a tower fell,” I laugh softly, “my dad and I are laughing hysterically as it falls, I didn’t even care about winning I was just having fun with my dad.” 

I turn my eyes off the road for a quick moment to look over at Nicky and he’s smiling thoughtfully. “That’s beautiful Phi, sounds like it was a great trip.”

“Oh god no, our hotel was infested with fleas, and my dad’s credit card got stolen on the second day, but those hours on the beach made it all worth it. Okay your turn, favorite picture.” 

Folio opens his phone and scrolls through rows of photos until he finally lands on one, “this one is for sure on of my favorites.” I look quickly and it’s a photo of him and the other guys from his band all grouped together with huge grins on their faces, almost like they’re laughing. “It was after the first concert of our first tour, I was the happiest I had ever been and when I knew that I’d do anything to make this dream come true with those guys.”

“That’s amazing Nicky, and you guys did it! That’s amazing.” 

We continue our game of a million questions for a few more hours of the drive while listening to music in the background. One question leads to more conversations and I feel like I’ve talked more genuinely about myself than I have in years. It’s so refreshing. At the halfway point we pull off in a small diner and eat a quick early dinner before Folio takes over for his leg of the drive. 

The great music and conversation make the last hours of the trip fly by, before I know it we are passing the Colorado state line in the late evening and finally pull into the resort’s long drive way at nearly 3 am for our check-in. I take a deep breath, “okay, are you ready fake boyfriend?” I ask him and he gives a mock salute, “oh I’m ready girlfriend, it’s gonna be a good time.”

next chapter ->

[noirgasmweetheart]

Hotel Berlin (1945)

This might be the most underrated War Era movie I've seen yet.

Both the theatrical trailer and the DVD cover advertise it as a corny exploitation movie. It's nothing of the sort. It's as sincerely written and acted as "Casablanca," with far more direct references to the Jewish people, and specific concentration camps.

I legitimately ordered the DVD just to see Peter Lorre as a disheveled angst-ridden scruff-muffin; I had no idea the character was going to be so compelling, or the rest of the movie equally so. Several other characters also exploded beyond the old clichés I was expecting. The movie appears to be building towards a predictable, cheesy love story, but...doesn't. Another character who at first appears one of the most despicable opportunists in the movie...isn't. And the movie's nuanced look at an indoctrinated population being carpet-bombed while their tyrannical, antisemetic leaders flee to save their own skins is uh...timely, to say the least.

I'm sure it helped that I watched this movie during a rainstorm at night, which is the way to watch it. The timeliness of a story about

Spoilers Below!

Faye Emerson deserved that top billing.

According to IMDB, Andrea King was originally to be billed as the film's female lead, with Faye Emerson billed as a supporting character. When Emerson married the son of President Roosevelt, she was given top billing over King, to capitalize on her new fame. I find that ironic, given that by the end of the movie, Faye's character Tilly has, against all odds, proven to be the film's true heroine.

Introduced as a materialistic Nazi informer, dating SS officers and betraying a hiding resistance fighter just to get herself some new shoes, Tilly's reality turns upside-down when she learns that the lover she thought she'd lost is still alive. After an emotional breakdown over what her despair let her become, she defends her boyfriend's mother against a Nazi officer, and delivers the most powerful speech in the movie. It is her character who finally mentions the Jews out loud, after an entire movie and an entire genre dancing around the subject.

I've recorded the scene from the DVD and uploaded it to YouTube:

"Go on shoot me, arrest me, have me killed, I don't care! Why should I. I loved Max Baruch and you sent him to a concentration camp! You hung a sign around my neck saying I loved a Jew! And you paraded me down the street. They'll hang something around your neck someday, and it won't be a sign!"

Corny Romance is Just a Red Herring

My stance that Emersen deserved that top billing in no way negates Andrea King's marvelous performance as the film's faux female lead. Though we are warned right from the start that her character, movie star Lisa Dorn, is a Nazi and a master manipulator, the film plays her as the straightforward love interest for much of the film: helping the hero partially out of the hope that he'll save her in return, seemingly building a genuine admiration for his heroism...then completely subverts expectations by revealing her to be exactly what she she was introduced as: a Nazi collaborator out to save her own skin.

I was genuinely afraid at the end that the hero would find himself unable to shoot her, and we'd see her tearfully declare her love for him, and end with him forgiving her. Not so. She argues pathetically, trying to excuse her betrayal and convince Richter that she loves him, and he doesn't fall for it. Richter sees Sam Spade's "I'll be waiting for you," and raises him two gunshots.

Peter Lorre like we've never seen him before

Okay, maybe we have seen Peter angsting around and wobbling drunkenly a few times before. But this was the first time I saw him directly address the issues that so closely affected him (and his costars of course) in real life.

Peter Lorre died before talk about the Holocaust really became mainstream. But the emotion behind the lines he delivers as the self-hating German professor speaks volumes. The gleeful smile he wears in his first scene, while saying that the bombing is only what the Germans deserve; his bitter sarcasm about the achievements of German science in the concentration camps, and wondering where all the "good Germans" are now; his breakdown when Richter tells him of a mutual friend's murder at Dachau. Much like his frantic escape attempt in "Casablanca," Peter likely didn't have to fish too hard to dig up the needed emotions for these scenes.

This is also the closest I've ever come to seeing Peter cry.

Other PL fans have lamented that his role was too small. I agree that I'd have loved to see a hell of a lot more of Koenig, but it's not like many of the other characters had much more screen time, which all the different storylines running at once. Aside from maybe Helmut Dantine and Andrea King, most of the important characters probably only have a handful of scenes tops.

Edit: That said, knowing he had scenes indicating how he joined the resistance that were cut is very frustrating.

But the fact that Peter's character not only lives to the end as one of the heroes, but gets to read President Roosevelt's uplifting speech to the German people, definitely counts for something.

That speech packed a powerful punch for me, at a time when I sometimes need reminding that indoctrinated civilians in war zones are still individuals, and can't be lumped with their dogmatic leaders. I don't doubt for a minute that President Biden took inspiration from Roosevelt for how to address the Palestinian people in regards to stopping Hamas.

The Fugitive

I suppose I should also mention the film's lead: Helmut Dantine as Martin Richter, the German anti-Nazi resistance fighter who escaped Dachau Concentration Camp. Helmut Dantine played Jan, the Bulgarian husband in "Casablanca." The controlled desperation with which he gambled at Rick's roulette wheel as Jan serves well for his fugitive resistance fighter in this movie. The fact that Dantine was actually imprisoned at Rosserlaende Concentration Camp for his anti-Nazi political activism at age 19 no doubt also helped him in the role.

My only complaint is the makeup and costuming department failing to help him look the part. While Paul Henreid got a scar and a white streak of hair for Victor Laszlo, Dantine is done up to look like a particularly slick, clean movie star, standing out in a cast of disheveled and weary looking people. One could interpret this as a symbolic way of singling him out as the hero, but I found it distracting. I am not throwing shade on Dantine's acting abilities or natural looks, just how the people in charge had him presented.

I'm unsure how to close this review.

It's getting late and I have some more clips to upload, and cake to eat. "Hotel Berlin" is up there with "Casablanca" on my personal list of unironically great old movies. Professor Koenig is on my list favorite Peter Lorre characters, and I have a handful of new favorite actors.

I'll just finish by saying that this guy in the barrette looks noticeably like Robert Picardo, if maybe a "stretched out" version thereof. Voyager's EMH hanging out with a holo-Peter Lorre in one of Tom Paris's noir programs is something I never knew I needed.

[stvlti]

linger like a sandwalk - a playlist for Dune Part Two

I'm back 💃 after 2 years of not posting new playlists for my fandoms 💃 this new Dune movie is living in my head rent free 😮‍💨 of course I had to make fanmix for this one to try and consolidate my thoughts.

Tracks ⏏️

Bloodline -- Gabriels  //  No Church in the Wild -- Jay-Z & Kanye West  //  Mary Magdalene -- FKA Twigs  //  Pink Matter  -- Frank Ocean  //  Smother -- Daughter  //  Say You'll Go -- Janelle Monáe  //  A Time of Quiet Between Storms (Dune Part Two OST) -- Hans Zimmer  //  Your Blood -- Nothing But Thieves  //  The River -- Kero Kero Bonito  //  Bad Religion -- Frank Ocean  //  Telekinesis -- Travis Scott ft. SZA & Future  //  Transform -- Daniel Caesar ft. Charlotte Day Wilson

Meta ⏏️

An explanation of the song choices & related thoughts on the film *

(*) I still have not read the book *lies down* As soon as life slows down I swear I will. The 2 Denis Villeneuve films combined already make for a rich narrative and storyworld however, and this playlist is very much based on that.

▶️ Bloodline -- Gabriels

It's the bloodline This thing came before you Bloodline

I wanted to open this playlist on something that gets right at (one of) the core themes of Villeneuve's Dune, and to me that is the idea of bloodlines, legacies and self-fulfilling prophecies.

Birth rights can be stole Truth is you were always alone Tears in your hands Seems you lost before you began Your ancestors' blood fed the soil and the sand

I think a point that many filmgoers miss - and is also a point I missed on my first viewing of Part Two - is that the Lisan Al Gaib prophecy and Paul's claim to it is wholly manufactured. Upon rewatch, several lines in the 2 films jumped out to me: 'On Arrakis, a path has been laid' (Mother Mohiam in Part One), and first Paul (during his first meal in Sietch Tabr) and then Lady Jessica's declaration that they must persuade the non-believers that he is the Lisan Al Gaib so as to ensure their continued survival among the Fremen. Irulan's later commentary, 'these are our religious patterns', cemented this fact for me. We are reminded that The Bene Gesserit has sent missionaries to the Fremen over decades and centuries, creating the religious circumstances for Paul to consolidate power among the natives. He has as much a claim to the title of the Mahdi / Lisan Al Gaib as any other outerworlder from the Houses of the Imperium - that is to say, he isn't really the Chosen One. 'Birth rights can be stole', and this is a birth right he stole.

Yet, he does undoubtedly hail from his mother's Bene Gesserit lineage and, through consuming the Water of Life, inherit the ancestral memories of both his masculine and feminine forebearers from both the royal bloodlines and the Fremen lineage of Reverend Mothers. (We see this during the montage after he takes the WoL, falling through a super cut of the faces of the Fremen Reverend Mothers who came before him before eventually finding a vision of Alia on the sand dunes.) His 'ancestors' blood fed the soil and the sand' on which he now stands as the (false) prophet that will lead his Fremen tribe to ruin...

It's the bloodline Don't let it destroy you Bloodline

... and in ascending to the title of the Mahdi, he will undoubtedly lose everything that made him Paul the individual in the first place. Greater prophecies, plans and conspiracies will eclipse his humanity. This is the real bloodline that drives him to war and genocide. 'Don't let it destroy you' - but maybe it's already too late.

▶️ No Church in the Wild -- Jay-Z & Kanye West

I mean, come on, this song choice is just too obvious isn't it?

Human beings in a mob What's a mob to a king? What's a king to a God? What's a God to a non-believer who don't believe in anything? Will he make it out alive? Alright, alright No church in the wild

'Mob' = the Fremen and their Fedaykin guerilla troops. 'King' = Rabban, and later Feyd-Rautha, and the Harkonnen regime. 'God' = Paul as Mahdi and Muad'dib, the desert terrorist. 'Non-believer' = Chani and her brethren among the Northern skeptics.

But the sonical landscape of this song also played a huge part in my inclusion of the song on this list. I'm a lover of words before all else, but something about Dune made me want to curate a sonically coherent playlist that accompanies the story in lyrics as much as it does in sound. The grueling, forward momentum of this song's iconic beat lends itself to the raids the Fedaykin warriors launched against the Harkonnen-controlled spice fields.

▶️ Mary Magdalene -- FKA Twigs

In my head I call this the quintessential Bene Gesserit song. Listen, and read the lyrics:

A woman's work A woman's prerogative

The song makes it clear from the very first lines that it's about the woman's birthright and sovereignty. Most of the Bene Gesserit ladies we see in this film have roots in the royal bloodlines themselves. In that, they have a claim to a particular prerogative. Yet they also actively govern the domain of procreation, descendancy, succession, and survival of royal bloodlines. That is the nature of 'a woman's work' in this storyworld.

A woman's touch, a sacred geometry I know where you start, where you end How to please, how to curse Yes, I learnt you needed me Yes, I'm here to open you Yes, I know that your heart is blue (So cold)

FKA Twigs' darkly seductive vocals paired with this particular verse really evokes that entire Lady Fenring/Feyd-Rautha sequence.

I fear before the fire True as Mary Magdalene Creature of desire Come just a little bit closer to me Step just a little bit closer to me

The seduction continues here, but there's power inherent in the 'creature of desire' Mary Magdalene represents. Her story and her iconography bears a heavy resemblance to the Bene Gesserit sisters and their relationships with the men of the Imperium and its court.

I can lift you higher I do it like Mary Magdalene I want you to say it Come just a little bit closer 'til we collide

A woman's hands So dark and provocative A nurturing breath that could stroke Your divine confidence

I really fuck with the Mary Magdalene allegory in this song, and the chorus nails the mythos and authority she commands in modern reimaginings of her figure in relation to Jesus' mythos. Yet there's something softer in the latter half of the chorus - the devotion she shows to her partner is on equal footing, less of manipulation and more of the muse she can be for him to realise his full potential. With the arrival of the second verse we truly see how important she is to a man's dominion. 'A nurturing breath that could stroke [His] divine confidence': that is the power of Lady's Jessica's love for and devotion to Leto Atreides.

A woman's war Unoccupied history True nature won't search to destroy If it doesn't make sense

Of course, it would be remiss of me not to point out that certain parts of the Bene Gesserit's characterisation functions as a manifestation and perpetuation of Frank Herbert's very of-its-time misogynistic, gender essentialist ideas of a woman's station and the (only) avenue through which she derives her power in the material world - her womb. (Miss me with that radical feminist bs.) But we also see, in the film, Princess Irulan's character: a female historian whom the film suggests would have been happier free from the trappings of the Bene Gesserit programme and her Imperial lineage. 'A woman's war; unoccupied history': Mary Magdalene is a prime example of how for most of history, women are often anonymous (as that Virginia Woolf saying goes), their histories are often erased and deemed as unimportant; Irulan's inner thoughts and history are also cast aside and given no voice in the Dune narrative, but in an ironic twist, she dedicates her life to documenting the history of others.

▶️  Pink Matter -- Frank Ocean

What do you think my brain is made for? Is it just a container for the mind? This great, grey matter Sensei replied, "What is your woman? Is she just a container for the child?" That soft, pink matter

This song provides more of a male - or at least, androgynous - perspective on the question of the Bene Gesserit breeding programme ('Is she just a container for the child?' / 'My God, she's giving me pleasure'). But it gets right at the core of the question of whether the women in this universe, and the avenue through which they gain power, is truly confined to being 'just a container for the child'. I also really liked the direct parallels Frank Ocean's lyrics draw between the womb (pink matter) and the mind (grey matter), as the other main source of power Jessica drives from is through her mind and the prescience becoming the Reverend Mother has afforded her.

▶️ Smother -- Daughter

In my head I call this Lady Jessica's song.

I want all that is not mine I want him, but we're not right In the darkness, I will meet my creators And they will all agree that I'm a suffocator

I think it's more intimate than either of the 2 songs that come before this one, and centres Jessica squarely in her role as a mother before her place as a Bene Gesserit sister. She knows she will meet her creators - the generations of mothers and Bene Gesserit sisters who came before her - and she knows they will disapprove of the path she has manipulated to suit her ends, first for Duke Leto (in bearing him a son) and then for her son's survival (in spreading propaganda of him as the Lisan Al Gaib among the Fremen tribes). Now I know that the films sort of reduce her to a one-dimensional villain in Part Two, but I've heard that she is a lot less gungho about their little homegrown personality cult of Paul as the Lisan Al Gaib / Mahdi in the book. In fact, his accelerated transformation into a religious figurehead and his willingness to exploit the Fremen for that, at the cost of his own humanity, seems to be an unintended outcome that she regrets. She has unwittingly become a 'suffocator', in that regard - a mother killing her own child's humanity in his metaphorical cradle as soon as she exposed him to tales of the prophecy.

Oh love I'm sorry if I smothered you I sometimes wish I'd stayed inside My mother

▶️  Say You'll Go -- Janelle Monáe

Say you'll go to Nirvana Will you leave Samsara? Or in the words of Dhammapada, "Who will lead? Who will follow?" Our love will sail in this ark The world could end outside our window Let's find forever And write our name in fire on each others' hearts

Something about Janelle's crooning vocals against the symphonic strings and melodies just makes this a timeless love song. I love including it in for my ships 🥺 and I think it rather fits PaulChani, the star-crossed lovers that they are. 'Let's find forever' is my 'I will love you as long as I breathe'.

But of course, the question of whether Paul will go south looms over their heads like the Sword of Damocles. 'Will you leave Samsara? ... Who will lead? Who will follow?'

▶️  A Time of Quiet Between Storms (Dune Part Two OST)

Among the Dune OST, this song holds a higher and special place in my heart because of the way it celebrates their first on-screen kiss, but is also used as a reprise of sorts at the end of the film as Chani walks out on Paul. It's a bittersweet track. And it's lived in my mind rent free much the same way that last shot of Chani, with her quivering lips and angry eyes, has.

This brings me to the name of the playlist: the PaulChani tragedy, and just, the film as a whole, has definitely lingered in my mind. It has dragged against my thoughts gently, but persistently like the rhythm of a sandwalk.

I also chose to place it in the middle of playlist to sever it into 2 parts, much the same way the film is severed into 2 parts: before Paul undergoes the Water of Life ritual, when he is still an idealistic boy who actively rejects the title of the Mahdi for fear of the wartorn future he's foreseen, and afterwards, when he claims the mantle of the Mahdi.

▶️  Your Blood -- Nothing But Thieves

You know it's your blood that I bleed Tell me that there's some way that I'll get through the night I carry your moral disease I don't wanna be something I'm not to stay alive

You guys don't know how long I've wanted to put this song on a fanmix!! I've called this Joey Wilson/Jericho's song from the moment I heard it 😂 but I think the same themes can be found in Paul's story too, specifically his first scene right after recovering from the Water of Life ritual. 'We're Harkonnens.' And his realisation that that's how they'll survive: by becoming Harkonnens. It's the Baron's blood that he bleeds, and conflicted as he is about that, eventually he'll come to realise that he has to 'be something I'm not to stay alive'.

▶️  The River -- Kero Kero Bonito

Holy mother Receive our hearts in your arms And let our souls pass The day the rain returns again

These 4 lines are repeated throughout the song, almost like a prayer. It reminds me of the way Stilgar holds onto those same 4 words, 'As it was written', throughout the film as an affirmation of his religious convictions - the belief that the true Mahdi will bring paradise one day and with it, the rain.

When Earth is submerging And heaven is open The river will carry all of us to Where we belong ... Then a torrent crashes down Releasing the jungle swelling in the ground And as was foretold our time is out

▶️  Bad Religion -- Frank Ocean

If it brings me to my knees It's a bad religion This unrequited love To me, it's nothing but a one-man cult And cyanide in my styrofoam cup I can never make him love me Never make him love me

This song places us in Chani's pov. To her, Paul's meteoric rise of notoriety among the Fremen is 'nohting but a one-man cult'. She loved him as he was - an outsider who stayed humble and learnt her ways, and earned a place among her Fedaykin brethren. But as a power-tripping outerworlder claiming to be the Mahdi - she doesn't recognise him, and she 'can never make him love [her]' again, not as the man he has become.

▶️  Telekinesis -- Travis Scott ft. SZA & Future

I could've took the pain and I could've went out sad Streets stepped in and raised me, but I ain't have my daddy

So I'm gonna be honest: this is actually the track that started this entire project for me 🙈 But you see it, right? Travis Scott as Paul's voice, and SZA as Chani's...

I can see the future, it's lookin' like we level through the sky I can't wait to live in glory in eternal lastin' life

The fact that 'I can see the future' is the refrain of this song. In its original context I'm almost certain that Travis meant it less literally, and more in the realm of being able to guess the trajectory of his career as he continues to top the charts as a hip hop superstar. But it lends well to the context of Paul's religious myth-making as well. 'Eternal lasting life' and all that.

How can I sleep when you're out catchin' bodies? I still wanna be with you, trust me, I know that's insane ... We both ain't shit and it's workin' for me Workin' for me, yeah I can see the future, I can see the future

The thing that breaks my heart about the ending of the film is that you can see Chani still loves Paul, but not who he has become. I also like that the song flips the refrain around and has SZA sing it too. Except when she says, 'I can see the future', she says it self-deprecatingly. It's a future of more heartbreak and betrayal (by way of mutual infidelity) and ruin.

▶️  Transform -- Daniel Caesar ft. Charlotte Day Wilson

If a leopard never changes its spots How can I change what I've got? Transform, transform, transform, transform We don't punish the tiger for catching its prey So how am I the one to blame? If it's in my nature Transform, transform, transform, transform

One thing rewatching these films has made me realise is that Paul's 'sudden flip' to becoming a coloniser exploiting the Fremen's religion for his own gains in Imperial politics after drinking the Water of Life is actually less of a plot twist and more of an inevitability that has been advertised since Part One. Towards the end of the first film, he says to Liet Kynes that he intends to marry one of the Emperor's daughters and make a play for the throne. In Part Two, during his first meal at Sietch Tabr, he says to his mother that he must convince the non-believers that he is the Lisan Al Gaib. He may not have intended to bear the mantle of the Mahdi, perhaps he was foolishly, idealistically looking for a different path towards revenge and the throne, but he has never been above playing the game and utilising court politics to secure his 'victory', so to speak. He was born of royal blood and forged in those politics. It's in his nature.

It's never over until life ends Lay down beside me, do it again

These 2 lines reminds me again of that promise Paul and Chani exchanged: 'I will love you as long as I breathe'. (And if I remember correctly, Chani said something to the effect of 'I will be here for you as long as you stay who you are' as well.) I didn't want to end this playlist on a downer ending, hence this song choice.

If you've made it this far into my meta-commentary, thank you! Hope you've enjoyed this playlist ♡