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#typical night
ardri-na-bpiteog · 2 months
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Also increasingly aware that a LOT of people "manage" getting through the 40+ hour work week by sleeping less than is healthy and relying on stimulants like coffee and energy drinks to keep them going.
For people who are unwilling or unable to do this...work really does just dominate your life. Like we really should not have to rely on unhealthy practices just to have a social life or keep on top of housework or whatever.
I know I post about this a lot but I'm so TIRED all the time and it's just so depressing that this is how we're expected to spend the one life we have.
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beckab · 1 year
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In my dream last night, @neil-gaiman asked me for help to come up with a non-binary name for a friend, and I said I'd love to because coming up with names is my favorite part of playing the Sims, and then I suggested "Gravy" 😅😭
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literaila · 22 days
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i suddenly thought of this:
satoru, a 6'3 man, probably lays down on top of reader...
“satoru, get off,” you say, but it sounds more like a bad receiver. you basically can’t breathe.
“sorry?” he hums. “did you say something?”
“i’m going to—“ a puff of breath and your hands trying to push him off. “die.”
“but you’re so comfy. like a memory foam mattress.”
“was that supposed to be a compliment?”
“why are you so warm?”
“i won’t be warm when i die from suffocation.”
he lifts his head to look at your face, your glaring eyes and flushed face. “you look like you’re breathing,” he adjusts himself so his head is against your chest. “oh, yup! there it is.”
“my impending doom?”
“your heart. healthy as a horse.”
“you just keep insulting me with these comparisons.”
“you’re a proudly bred mare. the prettiest of the… band? stable?”
“herd,” you say, huffing again. “now i’m actually going to die out of spite.”
“a dramatic horse,” he adds, pretending like he isn’t actively plotting against you.
“make sure to move my corpse off the couch. i don’t want the kids to see me dead.”
“if you die, i’m dying with you. megumi could probably get his dogs to eat us”
“that’s disgusting,” you say, laughing just a little. “don’t talk about that.”
“you’re the one who brought it up.”
“cause you’re crushing me!”
“but isn’t that a nice way to go?”
“i’ve already planned my death,” you tell him, trying to pull his hair. but he’s got your hands pinned. “i’m going to be executed after i murder you.”
“uh-huh,” he hums, nuzzling his nose into your neck. “let me know how that goes.”
“satoru,” you whine, but you’ve given up the fight. “you know you’re basically a giant, right?”
he shakes his head against you.
“a giant psychopath,” you add, “with tentacles for hands.”
“should we test that out?”
“shut up. get off of me.”
“ahh, can’t hear you. i’m sleeping.”
“oh great,” you deadpan. “it’ll be so much easier to kill you in your sleep.”
he pretends to snore, but you can feel his teeth against your neck as he grins.
“you shouldn’t let your guard down around me, you know?”
“i think this would be a nice way to die,” he says, instead of answering. “as long as you’re the one murdering me, of course.”
“oh, of course.”
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gatorlovebot · 8 months
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imagine being simon’s personally appointed handmaiden. a very uncommon practice for a king, but he was also unwed, uncommon for a king of his status and age.
a very gruff man with a hard exterior but over the years you two had developed a great rapport with one another. mostly waiting to be behind closed doors to really let loose when it came to both of your respective personalities. in front of the other staff and royalty you were quiet and obedient, but when it was just you and simon you could rib the masked king for days, feeling a thrill in your stomach whenever you got him to huff out a laugh. he could dish it right back though, pulling mind numbing puns from out of nowhere that you pretend aren’t funny. it makes him laugh even harder when you roll your eyes, your only acknowledgement of his “jokes”.
you two were very close, spending most of your waking moments with him. you didn’t expect to like it as much as you do when you were originally appointed to be the king’s sole handmaiden. the king was quite intimidating, the task itself seemed so daunting and you had just assumed that he would be using you for more nefarious duties. while a life of servitude may not have been what you pictured for yourself, a life of servitude for simon was definitely not what you had pictured either.
he was big and imposing and impossible to wake up in the morning. over time you had resorted to flicking water in his face when he was getting really close to sleeping through some of his important appointments that morning.
he liked his baths scalding hot. you would turn your back to him as he shrugged off his robe and submerged himself in the steamy water, pretending to futz with his towels. you always felt something in your heart settle when you heard his deep and satisfied sigh as he finally allowed his muscle to relax under the hot water.
he always wanted you to pick out his clothes. didn’t matter the ocassion either, he said you never lead him astray with your choices. you always felt a sense of smug, satisfation when he finally lumbered out of bed and pulled on the clothes that you had already laid out for him without a word.
the other servants talk, of course. whispers and rumors bouncing off the castle walls about all the time you spent with the king. you tried not to let it get to you, simon promising to get rid of anyone who spoke a cross word about you. he was a man of his word, having banished a knight the month prior who had made an awful joke about the little peasant girl keeping the king’s bed warm at night.
your relationship with simon had well surpassed just your duties, he was kind and although you would never say it to anyone because he’s the fucking king, you consider him a friend. but you can’t help but realize how many moments you two have had recently. moments that cross the bounds of your relationship.
you sat in your little stool behind the tub simon currently was sprawled out in. having just finished washing out all the soap from his blonde hair you sat back, relaxing your aching body for a moment before you would have to get him out and send him off to bed.
“long day, ah?” he commented.
all you could do was hum in affirmation, eyes closed enjoying the quiet of the king’s large bathroom.
“here,” he murmured, not wanting to disrupt the quiet tranquility you two had created, “pop your feet in.”
you cracked an eye open to see him start sitting up in the tub, turning back to you. “what?”
once he saw he had your attention he settled himself back down, shoulders against the basin of the tub. “slip your shoes off and just,” he motioned to his shoulders, voice dipping low. you could picture his eyes slipping shut again.
you hesitated for a moment, realizing the gravity of what he was asking of you. but he was also your king and even though you two had an unconventional relationship, you dare not go against his wishes.
you slip your shoes off and bunch your skirt up in your hands, pulling it over your knees as to not get it wet. you did as you were instructed and pulled a leg over each of his shoulders, shuddering at the hot water alleviating the tenderness in your feet.
“feel good?” simon pondered.
“yes, very much so,” you can’t help but smile, “thank you, simon”
he laughs to himself, just a little breath huffed through his nose, “anytime.”
you slipped your eyes back shut and allowed yourself a moment to sit and breathe and relax. the feeling of movement snaps you out of your reverie, simon reaching up a hand to loosely hold around your ankle. you see his head shift, his stubbly cheek resting against your calf. you had asked him if he wanted to shave before his bath, but he declined, cranky from his long day and just wanting to get into his bath.
you’re shocked at the touch, not as if you and simon hadn’t shared casual touches before but this seemed. emotional. intimate.
you dare not upset your king, but you know something like this can’t go on for much longer. “should probably get you to bed soon, your highness.” you know he hates it when you use his title when it's just the two of you, but you feel the need to have a degree of separation between the two of you, if not you fear you might do something stupid like reach down and get your fingers through his hair.
simon sighs against your skin and you burn at the way you can feel his lips moving, “just a little bit longer, please?”
you can never deny your king, but you never want to deny simon.
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a-typical-nightowl · 7 months
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Happy anniversary to FRIDAY NIGHT FUNKIN it's been like 3 years lez gooo
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heybiji · 15 days
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dande's dying btw
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supersappho · 4 months
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What do u even do when pretty girl u got a huge crush on drools on u and hogs the blanket 🫡
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starlightshadowsworld · 4 months
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Dazai using his one phonecall to call Chuuya, to make a bunch of vampire puns and end it by telling him to dress nice for tonight.
All in a code only Chuuya understands.
Chuuya: And what do I get out of this?
Dazai: Fuck up Fyodor and kick my ass.
Chuuya: satisfied it's a date.
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bridoesotherjunk · 6 months
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eddie and venom playing videogames together would be so funny, i think
like i imagine if they play something like the Sims, Eddie is doing your typical "Make the sim as ugly as possible because it's funny" bit. just hideously weird looking with bright pink skin and pieces of the face clipping through each other because he's stretched it so much. he names them Shit Fart.
meanwhile Venom would be working so hard to make as close to a replica of Eddie as possible. Venom has downloaded twenty five mods to allow for larger lips and more tattoos. Venom's got so much custom content in the game to give Sim Eddie the best outfits. Venom buys Sim Eddie the nicest things in the game. Eddie's house is perfect.
Eddie sets his own sim on fire.
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lightbulb-warning · 6 months
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they're getting ready to steal ALL your candy
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cyber-streak-2 · 7 months
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Knockout: What do I get?
Breakdown: A night of fashion, mischief, mayhem, and possible death.
Knockout: Ooh, check, check, and check. Not sure about that last one.
Breakdown: It won’t be you.
Knockout: I’ll get my coat.
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pikafleetsyolo · 8 months
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had this idea like four years ago, and finally got to making it. someone's probably done it by now but oh well
(ignore that supposedly normal jack is still orange i was scared of making a new sprite)
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creatively-cosmic · 2 months
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COME NOW, TAKE THE STEP
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DON'T LOOK BACK, THERE'S NOTHING LEFT
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FOR YOU BEYOND THE VEIL
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YOU TRIED, AND YOU FAILED
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TO SAVE HER.
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royaltea000 · 17 days
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What the FUCK do y’all know about sexualizing nuns⁉️🤪
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s-c-l-n · 4 months
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college zukka roommates where its 3 am, sokka walks into their dorm and sees zuko playing every version of “please, please, please let me get what i want” with candles light all around his side of the room and notes that say “passing grade” on just about ever surface while zuko is sleeping
(sokka turns around and closes the door to go bother suki into letting him stay in her room for the night)
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a-typical-nightowl · 2 months
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bf and the bad bitches he pulled by being autistic drawing for vday but forgor to post here my bad
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