#unreality about the email

[waspsinyouryard]

Hey guys tumblr staff themselves personally sent me an email that most blogs on this site haven't seen even one post from me.

Please reblog for a bigger sample size!

[starredforlife]

the fucking democratic administration is going to maybe 50% chance throw us into a war before the general election if it doesn’t back the fuck off and cut the support for Israel. They are going to drop kick any and all momentum they have from a new candidate because of this. this Harris campaign becomes a complete lost cause.

[lifemod17]

giggling over this shot I found in my camera roll

PLEASE why is he making that face for 💀😂

What ails you, my little mouse? Would a slice of cheese cheer you up perhaps? 🧀🧀

[starbuck]

guys… i got an interview!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉

[vanhelsingapologist]

I am SO excited for Goncharov Daily on substack. Literally, seeing: “I’m scared that if he dies, his blood will be on my hands and there’s already so much I can’t wash off” in my inbox will end me.

[vladco-tech-official]

But I am built different tho. I can take it

You cannot.

I mean at this point do whatever you want, I'm not your father. Im just saying, I personally wouldn't recommend it.

[twilightarcade]

I may be mildly aromatic

[griffonposting]

WHATS YOUR FAVORITE DESSERT !!!!!!

Hmm.. That's another difficult decision to make, I've enjoyed an array of different sweets with vastly different flavors over time. Every single creation I’ve had the fortune to partake in is lovely in its own right, but my favorite dessert of all time is my mother’s rice pudding. It reminds me of simpler, more mundane times, when we sat around that aged wooden table worrying about matters that seem trivial now.

[icharchivist]

something about Dracula Daily that can’t leave my mind this year is how much i remember when it started last year, there were so many people saying stuff like “you all are getting into it right now while it’s new and everything and you’re making it trending, but you’ll see everyone is going to drop it eventually, none of you have this commitment for so many months”

and while people did drop out, obviously, the activity of this little “book club”, of the people who didn’t drop out, still made it trend up until the very end, there were enough people who were still motivated enough to read this book in this format that it carried on all the way to November

and now it’s starting again. now people who were sad they didn’t jump on the bandwagon last year AND people who loved the ride so much last year they’re participating again (and it being kept spicy thanks to the Re:Dracula podcast) are STILL participating to this tumblr bookclub enough to make it trend.

There were so many messages about how “you’ll see you’ll get tired of it so quickly”, and yet people made it a yearly commitment

there’s something so endearing about that

[some-teeth-in-a-trench-coat]

I hate when you're chasing someone on the highway by foot but you can't telekinetically grab them and pull towards you because they'll crash and die 🙄 you have to actually slow down time to catch up with them 🙄 because you need them alive and not mad at you 🙄🙄🙄

[livvyofthelake]

i’ve seen enough rug cleaning videos to know what i’m talking about so i can say this knowledgeably. at what point is it like. not worth it. at what point are you just wasting water and your time and my time. at what point do you accept that the rug is never going to be completely clean. i hate it when they pull out like. a shower rug that’s just plain blue and they go over it like five times with the soap machine thingy and they hose it down ten times and there’s always more dirt because idk they pulled this out of a dump for tiktok views and it’s like. give it up bro no one likes this no one cares about that rug not you not the people that threw it out not the person that’s going to buy it from whatever thrift store you donate it to once you’ve filmed your video. certainly your viewers don’t like these tiny boring ass rugs. like wow the original color is beige. groundbreaking. you’re making these videos for hate views and we all know it just leave the rugs in the garbage oh my god. do better. sorry that your rug cleaning business needs to be financially supported with youtube and tiktok money but this isn’t the way…

[gender-euphowrya]

i'm fucking proud of how far i've come like i used to feel like there was no hope for me to get my shit together but guess what. i just sent an email and didn't panic for 15 minutes over how to phrase it

[lovelyisadora]

i hate being sick, it’s week 3 of the new term and I didn’t realize I never registered for my thesis credits…they’re by arrangement so it shouldn’t be too late but god I think my advisor is going to be upset with me :/

[noxtivagus]

it's 4 am i'll sleep now c:

[roses-r-rosie3]

X-Mas list presentation

Batfam x M!Reader

Summary: instead of making a regular Christmas wishlist, the reader decides to make a whole presentation

Quote: “That is all Family! So open up your hearts and your wallets for me this holiday season”

✁ - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Why are you here?” Duke asked Jason.

“Same reason why you’re here, y/n wanted us to all meet up in the living room for some announcement” Jason sighed.

After everyone was in the room, you pulled out your computer and connected it to the Tv, which made everyone confused.

“Hello family, I know you must be wondering why you’re all here” you said.

“Yes”

“Yup”

“Mhm”

“Yeah”

“Can I go back to my game now?”

“Last year you guys totally fucked up Christmas, so this year I put together an entire presentation to tell you guys what I want specifically” you smiled.

Everyone in the room let out an audible sigh/groan. It was known by everyone in the family that you were very dramatic from time to time (24/7). But they never thought you would get this extra!

“Is that really what you called us here for?” Damian grumbled.

“Would you shut up for a second?” You snapped.

“Y/n I don’t think that’s how you should be talking to your little bro-”

“Anyways, Here’s the things you should keep in mind when you’re thinking about what kind of gift you will provide for me this year” you said as you interrupted Bruce from his lecture.

“First of all, I’m the only one who knows how to reset the Wi-Fi, and yeah that’s threat” you threatened.

That certainly got everyone’s attention.

“Secondly, if you don’t get me what I want I will get a sugar daddy, I don’t even care what you guys are going to say, I’ve had so many offers for sugar daddies that it’s unreal. The perks of being son of Bruce Wayne I guess” you said.

“Y/n, you do know that Bruce is rich right?” Jason asked.

“Not the point” you mumbled.

“And third if I don’t get what I want, I will also sell my feet pics online like I did last year” you said calmly.

“YOU WHAT?!” Bruce shouted

“Calm down, I only ended up making about 1 million from it” you sighed.

“ONLY?!” Dick gasped.

“I created a three tier system of different gifting levels, basically, the levels equivocate to how much you love me and how much money you have” you explained.

“Level one is the ‘I’m going to need therapy level’ which is only four to seven gifts. I would probably go into a depressive spiral, actually not probably, I definitely would be depressed” you said.

“Would you stop being so overdramati-”

“I’M NOT DONE YET” you said as you interrupted Tim.

“What would that mean for us? You may ask. It would mean that you would have to pay for my therapy. And the money that you guys spent on therapy would have been basically wasted, you could’ve bought me a whole bunch of gifts right now and avoided the situation” you smiled.

“I think that he’s lost his mind” Bruce whispered to Stephanie.

“You think?!” Stephanie whisper yelled.

“Level two is the ‘You’re getting warmer package’ This basically if you love me- Bruce can you stop whispering to Stephanie” you scolded.

“As I was saying… Level two is eight to fifteen gifts, which is basically equivalent to you texting me happy birthday” you continued.

“Level three is the ‘You’re sleighing it’ level. And if you remember, you guys were just a bit off the mark of hitting this because you guys only got me twenty three gifts. And in order to reach ‘You’re slaying it’ you have to get me twenty five or more gifts, I think this is totally do-able for you guys, especially because you can just use Bruce’s card if you guys are running low on money” you said.

“I have tons ideas for you guys and this whole slideshow is already in your email so you guys can look at it and reference it at any time” you smiled.

Everyone quickly checked their phones to see that you indeed emailed them your whole presentation.

“That is all Family! So open up your hearts and your wallets for me this holiday season” you smiled before leaving the room.

“Yeah he had definitely lost his mind” They all said in synchronization.

“I HEARD THAT!”

[lovexjoe]

PENPALS

Imagine getting bored going on the internet to see which prisoner you can penpal. Every prisoner had a description to get a little insight of their personality but Armando? There was nothing but his name, his age and where he was. He was handsome, so handsome you didn’t think it was real. You decided to send your first message out of boredom. Clicking the box that says “write your first letter and we will forward it to Armando”

You stared at the blank box wondering what the fuck to write to a prisoner who has been in there for years and seems to be serving life.

“Do you have books there? If so what’s your favorite ?

- My name is Y/N”

With that you click send and went about your day. It’s been two weeks till your email got a response. Shocked didn’t even cut it. You read the message a few times just to confirm.

“Most of the books are damaged. I don’t get to fully enjoy the book. The Great Gatsby was enjoyable. No one ever writes. How are you?”

Armando didn’t want to press send, but he was honestly so bored of the same routine every single day that maybe talking to someone wouldn’t be so harmful. Plus it wasn’t going to be anything beyond this computer screen that he only had for an hour to himself in the library. He glanced at the clock and he had about 15 minutes left when his email got a response.

“The Great Gatsby is a great book. No one ever writes because you seem unreal. I didn’t think I’d get a response, I still think you’re an AI. Things are okay on my side, life could be better but it also could be worse so I can keep pushing forward.”

Armando positions the webcam and takes a silly picture to attach to the email. He wanted to make sure you had the reassurance you needed, plus it’s nice for him to look forward to something.

“Am I real enough for you?”

Holy shit. You sent one back and he couldn’t believe how beautiful you looked. What was a girl like you doing talking to him? From then on the two of you got completely engulfed with each other. When Armando had the computer you made sure you had your phone or your laptop on you to talk to him. He eventually got access to video chat and he asked you for your first video chat date.

“I have video chat access now. Would you like to see me?”

You agreed to the video chat and quickly fixed yourself up with some lipgloss and brushing your hair quickly. One last glance at your mirror to see your computer ringing with a notification. You answered to see Armando and his handsome face.

“Como estas mi amor?”

Armando hates to admit it but he thought it was love at first sight. He felt giddy. Alive when he talks to you. Your smile, your voice and your eyes could light up an entire room. He was a little green of whoever got to see you everyday. He hopes one day he gets to hold you. You hoped the same thing. He was everything you could imagine minus being a fucking criminal.

You were pen pals with a criminal ….

Part 2?

Taglist: @yeahnohoneybye @cardi-bre91 @onlysarang @romanreignsluver1 @minwn

@armandosbabymama @dyttomori @bbyplutosblog @vergilnelosparda @believeinthefireflies95 @ebsmind @hopetookourvibe