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#used to and no ones gonna go out of their way to switch but.
midnightarcheress · 23 hours
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Simon thinks he could live like this.
pairing: bodyguard!ghost x actress!reader cw: nothing he's just down bad 7 | gold rush masterlist.
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“are you insane?!” Daniel shouts, slamming the door behind him and stomping his feet towards Simon with a menacing look, “you think you can just move her around like this?”
“she wasn’t safe in that house, this is for her protection,” he answers promptly, crossing his arms and taking a step in front of you, covering your frame from the irate man. if he could, he’d land a punch on his face in no time, not caring that technically he’s his boss.
“yeah? and you simply have to be here with her, right?” he scoffs, rolling his eyes at him. you watch the scene unfold from behind Simon, brows knitted together and bottom lip nearly bleeding from biting too much. he’d managed to momentarily tranquillize you, bring you back to earth after the terrifying panic state, but the anxiety kept simmering underneath your skin, just waiting for another chance to take over your body.
“the shitty security system you put in her house wasn’t enough to prevent the bastard from intrudin’, the bloody alarm didn’t even go off,” he retorts, eyes shooting daggers straight ahead, “so yeah, i’m gonna stay with her for as long as it’s necessary. contract says to protect her, doesn’t it?” 
the two of them stay quiet, a silent staring competition on Daniel’s side, a mere warning on Simon’s side. he won’t budge, won’t allow you to go back to that house, hand you on a silver platter to the grim reaper hiding behind letters and eerie messages. 
Dan leans on his side to look at you, ignoring the mass of a man in front of him. “are you sure about this?” his tone is strangely soft, like a switch flipped in his mind, all anger vanishing. you nod, offering him a small smile that does a poor job of concealing how nervous you are about the situation. he purses his lips, taking one last glance at Simon’s unwavering posture before sighing in defeat.
it’s been two weeks since the mirror message that led Simon into comforting you, and two weeks since he had to control his own panic, trying his best not to spiral. it had been a while since he shared a living space, so staying with you feels like a dream that he’s constantly afraid of turning into a nightmare by saying the wrong thing, acting the wrong way, or even thinking about what’s happening. 
the safe house Price arranged is far from the size you’re used to, being at least three times smaller than your own house. but to his surprise, again, your reaction to it contradicts his expectations. it could just be you being a phenomenal actress, covering your resentment behind a beaming smile, but you seemed to have grown accustomed to his presence easily, didn’t protest once, never lamented the loss of luxury and privacy.
he wanted to deny the feeling, shove it deep down in his brain and lock the safe, but it was nice, the domesticity of it all. it was nice learning little details about your routine; how you only get out of bed the second time your alarm rings; how you’re definitely not a morning person, judging by the gruff good morning you mumble when you slide to the counter stool; how you love trying new recipes and quietly dance in the kitchen, freezing when you notice him watching you; or how you’re always carrying something to read, it being a book or a script.
it was nice making you coffee in the morning and seeing you rub your sleepy eyes, nice hearing you humming a song in the shower, nice catching a glimpse of you in lingerie when you forget to lock your bedroom door, nearly making him choke in his own spit by the sight of the small tattoo on your hip. is it a star? a flower?
he felt like he was playing house with you. a game where you’re his loving wife and he’s a devoted husband, where he could feed his delusions, live everything he was convinced he’d never have in this lifetime. inside those walls, he could do it all, except the one thing he longed the most – touch you. kiss the top of your head when you’re baking in the kitchen, run his fingers through your hair when you’re curled up on the couch, feel your soft skin under his fingertips when you lay in bed, bend you over the table when you pass by him in skimpy pyjama shorts.
“do you... wanna watch a movie?” you ask, remote in hand and head leaned back on the sofa, chewing the inside of your cheek and attentively glaring at the television. he tilts to the side, stirring his thoughts away and taking in the view of your features illuminated by the bright lights coming from the screen. it was easy to get lost in how beautiful you were, a magical creature brought to earth to bewitch him. 
your head suddenly shifts to where he’s sitting, and it hits him that you’re still expecting an answer. fuck. “uh, yeah, sure.” he mumbles, snapping back to the telly, swallowing the desires his throat dared to spill.
later that day, Simon steps onto the front porch for a much-needed nicotine fix, dark blues painting the sky as the last rays of sunlight vanish from the horizon. he hates the burning sensation of the smoke in his lungs, but always craves the lightheadedness and dopamine flush in his veins, no matter how many years it takes from his life. 
“god!” you jump, looking behind you and putting a hand over your chest to steady your rapid heartbeat, “you really are a ghost, aren’t you?” a chuckle falls from your lips after the startle, travelling the air like a lullaby, and he ignores the flutter in his chest that happens whenever you laugh.
“sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” you shrug and turn back to your initial position, sitting on the steps and watching the crunchy tree leaves dancing in the breeze. he follows your gaze to the front lawn, bringing a cigarette from the pack to his lips, debating if he should truly smoke with you in there. you never complained, but he’s caught you frowning at the thin cardboard a few times around the house, so he decides not to light it.
“can i ask you something?” you blurt out, lifting your chin to face him, eyes searching for his, and his head dips, irises focusing on yours. one brow raises at your sudden curiosity and he nods, back propped against the column, waiting, “why Ghost?”
his jaw tenses, gaze shifting from you to the carton in his hands. the ever-dreaded question. “dunno. just a nickname.” lie. he couldn’t tell you how everything was taken from him and he faked his death years ago; how he truly became the ghost of man. you don’t deserve to be burdened with that knowledge, so it is just a nickname. 
he looks back to you, gauging if you bought his deflection or not. you’re still focused on him, vision flicking at every crease of his expression, waiting for any falter, but it doesn’t come. “you can call me Simon.”
the thin line of your lips breaks into a smile, cheeks rising and making his heart skip a beat. so much for easy detachment, “okay, Simon.”
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the way i still have at least ten parts of this story in my outline but i'm so unmotivated to write it :(
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cripplecharacters · 2 days
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Do you have any tips (or previous posts) about how to write a young person who’s first-time cane user? This one is for a character who escapes a lifetime of being experimented on, and learns in the aftermath of being rescued that this rather compromised her ability to walk well again. I’ve written characters with other mobility devices for getting around. But never canes. I myself am physically disabled but have never needed anything like these before. I’m always eager to learn.
Hi!
If your character is a first time cane user, here's some things that could happen:
She will need to learn how to walk with the cane first. When you're starting, it's easy to mess up (though it could be my dyspraxia speaking) and overfocus on how you should walk because you're just getting used to it. She could randomly stop and correct her gait, or look down a lot to check if she's still doing the motion (left arm and right leg forward, or the other way around).
She's probably gonna drop that thing a lot. Especially if she has a weaker grip in the cane hand - now, I don't have this problem (the opposite, rather) - but the overall thing is a really common occurrence for most of us. Walking and hit the smallest pebble imaginable? Cane on the ground, somehow. Tried putting it against the wall or table? It's on the ground. And then you need to reach for it... it's a struggle sometimes.
If she's not helped in picking the cane, she will spend some time figuring out what grip and height are comfortable for her. (Grip depends on personal preference, no one's preference has ever been the doorknob handle, height is generally to the person's wrist from the ground up.) I think that this could be an interesting opportunity to talk about disabled communities - maybe she's frustrated with the process and goes to an older (more experienced) cane user to help her?
If it's during the winter, her hand is gonna be freezing - and the opposite in the summer - and she might not be prepared for it. The handle can get HOT and it can be an issue. Depending on what her actual disability is, she might try switching which hand to hold it in. If she's able to do that, another character could warm up her cold hand :)
The first couple of times walking with a cane are an Experience. You feel way better, but also everyone is suddenly staring. Some people care about that, some don't. But it can be somewhat overwhelming either way.
Spatial awareness is gonna suck at first. She will bump into what feels like everything with the cane. Especially doorframes. It's always doorframes for some reason. Or mess up and have her cane slip down because she hasn't realized how close to the curb she was.
She will hit her shin. It will hurt.
She's probably going to be speedy with that thing! Getting a cane is like getting a speed boost. Without it, I have episodes where I'm extremely slow (my highest, extreme-pain speed would be slower than a person walking very casually) and with it, I'm faster than a lot of able-bodied people! It's fun and she would have fun with it.
She will not know what to do with the cane when she doesn't need it. For me, using backpacks always cause issues because I don't know how to hold it without dropping it, but I also need to swap hands, something gets stuck on the handle... it's a whole process that takes a comical amount of time at first. Same when going to the public bathroom, where are you putting it when you aren't using it...? It's a lot of trial and error and a lot of "eww, my cane just touched the dirtiest surface humanly imaginable".
In the real world, people are (overly) interested in young cane user's business and tend to stare a lot. Now, it doesn't have to be like this in your story, but it's often just an annoying part of life. Your character might feel awkward and feel like she needs to explain herself, but this goes away after some time. You just get desensitized after a while.
In the real world, people are sometimes interested and nice about it! For example, a lot of older people can be insecure about using a cane, exactly like younger people. I've heard stories about older people asking younger users where they got their cane from, how are they so confident with it, etc. Another opportunity for a disabled community moment!
I hope that my suggestions were helpful, it's been a while since I was a first-time cane user so I wrote down what I still remember, haha.
Mod Sasza
Hi!
I agree with Sasza on pretty much every point and wanted to add some things from my own experience.
It's really, really hard to hold both a cane and an umbrella at the same time. Sometimes I'll give up and get wet. Sometimes I'll give up and store the cane. She might do either of those, depending on what she hates more: being wet or walking without the cane. Or she could get a raincoat if that works for her.
Speaking of umbrellas, sometimes you need your umbrella and you need your cane and you also need a free hand. This Sucks. What I do for this sometimes (and maybe she or other people have better, smarter, more useful solutions than this) is shove my umbrella into my shirt or backpack strap or something, so the umbrella is Held Up by it. This is not very effective, and will not last long. But if I need to look up a map on my phone or adjust something on my clothes or get my keys, it can work. Sort of.
Just like mod Sasza said, people will take interest in your cane, younger and older alike. I've had people of all ages compliment my cane (it has flowers) as well as people of all ages tell me I'm too young to need a cane or ask what's wrong with me. An older woman once asked me where I got my cane as she had been wanting a 'pretty' one, and that was a nice moment.
She might develop a new awareness of mobility aid users. When you're new at using one and trying to figure it out, you're probably going to be frustrated, because it's a new skill like any other. But it might make her (like it made me) notice more people using canes. It's not that I never saw them before, but that they were more common than I ever thought, and I never would have noticed how common it was if I hadn't had to slow down and practice my skill.
Cane tips get dirty, and cane tips wear out. These both depend on where your character is using her cane (outdoors vs indoors, scratchy asphalt vs smooth wood) as well as how often. A cane with a worn-out rubber tip really sucks and is more unstable and if the cane is made of aluminum and the tip is worn out and you hit the cane the wrong way, you can damage the cane. Ask me how I know.
That's all I can think of right now that I had to learn to deal with when I started! As you can see I still don't have a solution to the rain thing and it's been like two and a half years...
- mod Sparrow
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artoodeetootired · 11 hours
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lowkey
when two celebrities known for being a beast in their respective fields are actually the shyest in real life- especially when it comes to attraction.
op!81 x fem!singer (smau)
p.s (let's pretend the qatar and las vegas gp's are rounds 10 + 12 of 24 respectively hehe)
ynuser
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Tagged: bsfuser
ynuser so... been kind of busy lately...
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forynln U DISAPPEAR FOR 5 MONTHS AFTER UR LAST ALBUM AND POST OUTTA NOWHERE... girl u cannot keep doing this to us...
-> user1 lol watch her
-> user2 Bruh stfu she literally gave us a god sent album made of unicorn shit she doesn't owe u anything
bsfuser i hate you for telling me what's boutta go down but not let me say shit to anyone 😞
-> user3 it's ok bestie u can tell me, i won't tell anyone :)
ynluv How she is so different irl compared to her stage self still baffles me to this day.
-> user4 FR like wdym u gonna be busting out moves that get u viral then act like the sweetest creature on earth when u out here?? 😭
-> user5 duality go prr. she's probably the shyest celebrity i've ever seen.
-> user6 I can't believe she's an '03 baby.
gracieabrams omg ur orange cat
-> user6 car*
-> user7 car*
-> user8 luv u gracie
user9 orange suits yn so well
user0 lando is such a fanboy 😂
-> user| him and half the grid have been so consistent with promoting her LMAO
oscarpiastri posted a story 5m
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landonorris: would've been right next to u if stroll hadn't crashed again
mclaren: 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
user_: being very calm compared to ur reaction after lance's fiasco today LOL
logansargeant: LET'S GOOO
user@: wow our pastry posts after a century
alexalbon: oi why didnt you take lily's and my advice to post with yn's music if u asked us in the first place...
Twitter
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f1
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f1 Our special guest performer and new partner for the 16th round on our calendar, Las Vegas, has been confirmed; a little fun before the racing begins! We bet you guys will like this one... 🤭
Until then, round 11 in Netherlands next weekend 🇳🇱 Stay tuned!
Liked by rihanna, katyperry, ynuser, and 795,392
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user! omg i have been waiting for this
f1forlife istg if they bring out the same performers as before...
fanacc the amount of singers liking this post is really fucking with us LOL
alexalbon hi f1 pls tell me u listened to us and booked the grid's voted fav 😸
-> charlesleclerc agreed.
-> maxverstappen1 agreed.
-> landonorris @oscarpiastri and i will boycott.
-> oscarpiastri mate i didn't even vote.
-> landonorris okay fine but u do like yn/ln right? ...right? 🔪
-> oscarpiastri ...
-> landonorris dw everyone osc's just shy no need to cancel him
-> danielricciardo 💃🏽
-> lance_stroll wait there was a vote?
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ynuser
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ynuser switch up
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forynln she's killing us and she knows it damn well
user pls just one hint 😭
user how do u feel about oscar piastri not liking u LMAO
arianagreenblatt gorg bestie 😩
user the aesthetic change is very sus
user ladies and gentlemen, the queen of singing, dancing, and gatekeeping
-> user the way we still pine after her and her whereabouts even though she is the most nonchalant pop girl out there
-> bsfuser she's cooking smth 🧐
-> frd2 yk smth dont u 🥸
2 weeks later...
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Instagram
georgerussell63 posted a story 20sec
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lewishamilton: why did i not see toto doing this????
ynuser: it was a pleasure meeting u too 🤠
f1: You boys are very welcome
totowolff: George...
-> georgerussell: please don't fire me
landonorris: ok but did u see the way she looked at me??
-> georgerussell lando, u know full well she was looking at someone else
-> landonorris shut up :(
-> georgerussell i will not allow u to ruin her with ur playboy antics
-> landonorris EXCUSE ME
landonorris and f1 🔁
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Tagged: f1, ynuser, charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, georgerussell63, fernandoalo_official, maxverstappen1, and oscarpiastri
landonorris best. weekend. ever.
mini photo dump of the boys at the concert 'cause @ynuser actually performed for us 🤯🤯 we're such huge fans- it was epic meeting you!
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landonorris p.s. oscar loves her, he's just shy
-> oscarpiastri lando u idiot
-> logansargeant i can confirm ahem
mclaren we advocated for this very hard, just so yk...
-> user0 the gods (you) have bestowed us simpletons (seriously) with such a blessing (yn and mclaren interactions)
-> userl for the whole grid? the fans? ...or a particular someone? 🤭
ynuser epic meeting me??? bro i almost fainted meeting u guys and drivers i've been a fan of since i was 10 😭😭😭
-> bsfuser how was it omg
-> ynuser LOL definitely an interesting experience...
-> landonorris omg she replied 😭
-> georgerussell bro she called u bro
user_ im convinced theyre music drunk and not substance drunk here 😮‍💨
ynuser
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Tagged: f1
ynuser you all already know. this thread is as aesthetically chaotic as my mind rn.
thank you to my team for handling such a mess of me when since i got this invitation !! could not be here, or look this decent without any of u.
thank you to @f1 from the bottom of my heart. i've been such a fan since i was in nappies, nd you guys just made a dream of mine come true. from the races, new friends, to performing for such a crowd in vegas, it has been one of the most surreal weekends of my life. you all just know im gonna be clutching on to this partnership for as long as i breathe. nd congrats to @maxverstappen1, @oscarpiastri, nd @charlesleclerc on the podium ! until next time 🏎💋✨
(last slide is real footage of me meeting toto wolff)
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redbullracing thank you for stopping by our pit!
-> mclaren ok but she went to ours first
-> scuderiaferrari yeah... she liked us most though. should've seen her face when she walked in.
-> mercedesamgf1 you guys know she was a long-time mercedes fan before this right??
-> landonorris what is going on? (she definitely liked hanging out with us more)
-> logansargeant lol you're so delulu (laughed way harder with my group)
oscarpiastri thank you too! we should hang out again sometime soon
-> landonorris 'hang out' pfft sure
-> user omg oscar commenting on a non-f1 person's post??? a FEMALE nonetheless????
-> oscarpiastri everyone has to chill fr
bsfuser that’s MY BESTIE
-> user she is GLOWING
-> ynimagine mommy??? sorry. mommy??? sorry.
-> user she is SNATCHED WTF
oscarpiastri
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Tagged: danielricciardo, ynuser
oscarpiastri 2nd in vegas! amazing job to the team for this accomplishment, daniel for his dedication, nd yn, who we're all still star-struck by. cheers! 🍾
(credit to @pierregasly's story for second slide)
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user guys istg i was in the paddock the whole time AND i know what i saw. so when i say they hit it off really well...
user omg oscar even picked up on her 'nd' habit 😭
ynuser 🧡🧡🧡
-> user u are actually an angel sent from the depths of hell in the best possible way. the setlist??? the body and face??? the personality???
landonorris oscar you... 😨 when did u even go to the front of the stage for that last pic????
lewishamilton cute, flirty, teenage stuff and all but are we not gonna talk about danny ric
-> danielricciardo i think we should just go back to gushing about oscar's crush
-> carlossainz55 his crush??? what am i missing????
-> charlesleclerc the baby has grown up
bsfuser 🤨
f1
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Tagged: ynuser
f1 yn appreciation post 🤍🤍🤍
Could not have asked for a better performer and partner to grace us with her presence this weekend 👏🏼
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user my timeline is EXPLODING
user converting f1 fans into yn fans too
landonorris slay
-> danielricciardo slay
-> pierregasly slay
-> alexalbon slay
-> lewishamilton what is 'slay'?
-> charlesleclerc slay
-> maxverstappen1 slay
ynuser thank u thank uuu
-> user9 queen what were u on tonight??
-> {user} not even her debut was this hype 💀
ynworld STEP ON ME
f1__grid bruh this is so unecessary... she clearly just wants attention
-> user# stay pressed ur favs like her more than u <3
Twitter
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3 weeks later...
oscarpiastri posted a story 10sec
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Liked by ynuser, mclaren, maxverstappen1, and others
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user: soooo wonder who took this photo 🧐
user: u guys got smth to tell us? ;)
alexalbon: why do u look depressed today
landonorris: where are u bro
user: what's ur fav yn song?
ynuser: im sorry i can't make it today osc :(
-> oscarpiastri: it's okay, best to let everyone cool down anyways. i'll see u next week?
-> ynuser: i promise :)
1 week later...
ynuser posted a story 30sec
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Liked by bsfuser, f1, oscarpiastri, and others
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lewishamilton: ayeee my fav coming over to the pit today?
-> ynuser: i wouldn't miss it for the world 😸 plus fans are dying to know how u pick ur fashion sense out
-> lewishamilton: oh lord
f1: 🤍
landonorris: pls be kind with the question this time :(
-> ynuser: aweeee
-> ynuser: no.
oscarpiastri: wya??
3 more weeks later...
oscarpiastri posted a story 16sec
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ynuser posted a story 37sec
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1 month, 3 races, and 2 performances later...
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~3 months later...
oscarpiastri
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Tagged: ynuser
oscarpiastri i can't take it anymore. since u guys have wanted to know, anyway.
you've been on my mind since the day i met you (nd yes, admittedly since lando showed me your music videos), nd then when i met you with the biggest crush, i quickly decided that you are one of the most talented, beautiful, kindest people ever. fuck all if i just got my first win, it wouldn't have meant anything without u. i can't have asked for a better partner in crime to wear my number at the races.
although we've been pretty great at keeping it low key these past few months to just family and friends, i wanna show you off, my love x
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oscarpiastri also, ty to the grid for keeping it private, nd yes, i will be treating u all for dinner.
-> danielricciardo LFGGGGG
user oh my god.
jennaortega the question is if she beat him at karting
-> oscarpiastri she did...
carlossainz55 i never thought this day would come
landonorris cant put both my happiness and bewilderment that you actually hard launched into words
-> georgerussell character. development.
user ONE OF MY FAV SINGERS BECAME MY FAV WAG TOO AHHHHHHHH
arianagrande y'all cute asf 😭😭😭
user I CALLED IT
-> user nah dont u lie we all thought we were lying to ourselves LMAO
bsfuser one wrong move and i’ll send stroll to do more than just hit u on track 😺
-> oscarpiastri ;-;
-> maxverstappen1 u could send any one on the grid to do it, and they'd be happy to
user they're so in love im bawling
landonorris just so u guys know, his three sisters steal her away from him every week to hang out LOL
-> oscarpiastri that was totally unecessary
-> nicolepiastri give the ppl what they want ossie
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ynuser
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Tagged: oscarpiastri
ynuser sike.
'orange suits yn so well'... damn right for him 🧡
this man has inspired me in too many ways, that aside from teaching me how to love and be loved. it's been pretty hard having all these memories, but not being able to live them freely because of the pressure. but i wouldn't do it with anyone else. so im gonna be 'showing you off' in my latest single, agora hills, coming out tomorrow night for my love's first win x
(to clarify, f1 has allowed me to take ONE side ONCE, so im not jobless :) ... yet)
Liked by oscarpiastri, dojacat, bsfuser and 6,001,685 others
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frd1 about fucking time
oliviarodrigo this is so cute omg
alexalbon ahem i think i should get some credit for being the ultimate matchmaker here
-> f1 actually, i think it all goes to us.
-> user 💀
logansargeant THE LAST PHOTO PLS SEND IT TO ME LMAO
gracieabrams omg him with her cat 😭😭
-> user gracie, luv, it's car*
-> user car*
-> sabrinacarpenter dw babes i don't get this shit either
user oscar first win AND yn new music AND hard launches from the softest ppl ever??? has the universe finally decided to bless me???
user they were literally meant to be
user what happened to the shy versions of themselves oml
tatemcrae the hottest, most sincere, and talented celebrity couple rn
bsfuser and i was there to witness it all 😌
-> charlesleclerc so was i
-> bsfuser i was first tho
-> charlesleclerc fair enough
-> landonorris i was there the most
-> bsfuser i was their couple counsellor
-> landonorris i was their matchmaker
-> alexalbon NO YOU WERENT
-> bsfuser i was first to find out
-> landonorris no you werent
-> landonorris right? @oscarpiastri @ynuser
-> landonorris RIGHT????
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ynuser
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Tagged: oscarpiastri
ynuser for u, ur first win, and to many more.
as an extra for u all, 'lowkey' is also out to show my progression from wanting to keep it a secret to having him make me scream his name <3 hope u love us as much as i do.
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user the caption???????????????????
user holy shit mother is mothering and father is fathering because never have i ever heard her make a track with sm detail about her partner in it...
-> user FR like where did the two of them go?? almost 8 months but they come back like they've aged a decade
-> user NO CAUSE WTF is 'suck a little dick in the bathroom, who that man with the big strong hands'???? miss yn??? are the both of u feeling okay????
-> user you'd think introvert + introvert = coma, but ig double negatives still apply here
dojacat bitch these tracks SLAP
user okay but osc's guns 👀
sza god, when will this shi happen to me?
mclaren All ur songs on repeat in the paddock.
-> mercedesamgf1 It's true, all the teams agreed
-> redbullracing (the only time we all agree)
user how tf did we get bashful yn and blushing osc to... this??
-> ynuser life's full of mysteries.
landonorris i miss the person i was before hearing these two songs...
-> georgerussell it's true, as big of a fan i am of the two of u, some things are meant to stay between ppl...
-> charlesleclerc i am not saying anything, which means i can get invited to the wedding, yeah?
-> ynuser yes.
-> oscarpiastri yes.
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a/n: as u can probably see, i lowkey gave up half way cause i never realised how much work this takes :,)
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evermoredeluxe · 21 hours
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a really interesting theme i find in taylor’s work is that of being a fool or fooling someone else. love is looked at from this lens of a thing that you have to tricked into. which is really juxtaposed by her belief of “it is fate.” i think it somewhat comes from how openly and hugely she loves vs her view of herself as something that brings disaster. and also some pretty formative experiences when she was a young girl going into adulthood and how she felt used and unworthy and small. hence, all the trickery to make someone love her and trying to be in control, whether she’s the one starting it or ending it.
in cowboy like me, she talks about how she’s conned all these men, and they’ve all fallen for her. she takes what she wants from then and then she bolts. then in hits different, she sings “i use to switch out these kens, i’d just ghost // rip the bandaid off and skip town like an asshole outlaw” she meets a boy, falls in love, and when they break up, she moves on quickly and goes to another one to not feel distraught, and when this new boy makes her fake promises, she does the same thing to him and moves on with someone else. she’s in control.
and then “i think there’s been a glitch,” and with joe, she thought it was gonna be something casual and they tried that but it turned out to be one of those things that supposed to last. her con finally works. after all these tries, she’s finally masterminded her forever, and she doesn’t even feel bad because he knew. but then, she realizes that she failed yet again, it didn’t work. she didn’t con her way into a sweet forever, but rather forever conned her. fate gave her something, she tried to control it, but she failed.
she tries again. she’s been talking with this boy from her past again, and she thinks that this time, bolting will work and she will find her happy ending. what she though was fate, meant to be, all the pain of her long term relationship and her leaving was supposed to meant something, but turns out that this time the script flips, and he was the conman and he was selling her a get-love-quick scheme (loml). and she doesn’t even get to bolt! he’s the one who leaves her behind (“i’ll never leave, never mind” - loml), and she can’t even complain.
all’s not well because it doesn’t end well because she didn’t end up with anybody. instead of trying herself again, she’s just begging someone to change the prophecy. and the alchemy still implies something not in her hands being a huge factor, and who are they to fight it? they have to abide by it. and ofc she equates love to religion and sees fate as a belief system. she wants it to work out, and it hits her hard whenever it doesn’t. i’ve been thinking about this since the album release and seeing some other posts, and my unpopular opinion is that i think it’s still something she believes in despite *gestures broadly* but after last year, she doesn’t wanna control it anymore. no fooling, she doesn’t wanna mastermind and do all the work, she just want it to be easy and she wants it to be simply good to her.
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minniesmutt · 1 day
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⚠︎ ━━━ IN...
⚠︎ ━━━  SS + WC: 8 + 2K
⚠︎ ━━━  CONTENT: ANXIETY, TOXIC EX,
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     “I’m here,” Y/n breathed as she approached the building
      “Okay. There’s a parking garage next to the building. Park in there. i gave the building management your car description so they shouldn’t say anything about you parking here.”
     “Alright.”
     Y/n followed his instructions and found a spot to park. 
     “I’m gonna meet you in the lobby. can you get over there for me?”
     “Yeah. can you stay on the phone?”
     “of course.”
     Y/n switched her phone off the car stereo and turned off her car. She grabbed her stuff and got out of her car. making her way towards the door where it said “LOBBY”
     She could hear Jeongin on the over end with Deiji; could even hear the little coos and babbles.
     “Astrid and ji are almost here by the way. should be another ten minutes till they get Deiji. Have you eaten dinner yet?”
     “No. I was trying to figure out what to eat when Jihyun texted me…”
     “Okay. We’ll order dinner. You can stay over in my guest room so you don’t have to go home.”
     “You don’t have to do that for me,” y/n said, opening the door and entering the lobby
     “Y/n, you’re creating a whole human inside of you. The least I can do is buy you food and give you a sense of safety.”
     She heard an elevator ding before she saw the doors opening and Jeongin walking out with a baby girl in his arms. he ended the call and quickly made his way over to her. y/n met him halfway and wrapped her arms around him. 
     “You’re okay,” Jeongin said as he held her against him. 
     “Thank you,” Y/n muttered
     “Come on,” Jeongin ushered her towards the elevators and took her up to his unit. getting her settled on the couch as soon as they got in.
     Jeongin put Deiji down in one of the stand-up toys and sat with Y/n
     “Still shaken up?” he asked 
     “Yeah,” y/n sighed 
     “Does he have your location?” 
     “No. I turned it off when we broke up.”
     “Still texting you?” 
     “Don’t know. ended up muting the conversation.”
     “Can I see?”
     Y/n nodded and handed him her unlocked phone. Jeongin took it from her hand.
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 “Sorry. That was the only thing I could think of,” Jeongin sighed 
     “It’s fine,” Y/n sniffled
     “Come here,” Jeongin pulled her into his arms.
     Y/n wrapped her arms around him and hid herself in his chest. “I’m sorry…”
     “You don’t need to be sorry,” Jeongin told her.
     Y/n buried her face in Jeongin’s chest as Deiji hit one of her toys. The baby toys filled the silence as Jeongin did his best to comfort the mother of his child. A knock at the door interrupted it. 
    Y/n jumped a bit and Jeongin checked his phone. Seeing the texts from his two friends that they were there. “Just Ji and (Astrid).”
     Jeongin unraveled himself from her and got the door. Letting his two friends inside. Y/n said hi to the couple and (Astrid) checked on her. Jisung grabbed his daughter and the diaper bag. 
     The two didn’t stay long, letting the new soon-to-be-parents be. Jeongin locked the door and walked back over to the couch. Settling back down next to her and grabbed his phone, “Dinner?” 
     “‘M not hungry…”
     “You don’t have to eat it right away, but you need to eat,” Jeongin said
     Y/n nodded in response. Jeongin quickly ordered something he knew she’d eat before pulling her back into his arms.
     “You’re good at taking care of people,” Y/n said
     “Can thank (Astird) for that,” Jeongin said
     “So she told me. Putting you through hell,” Y/n said
     “Yeah. But I wouldn't change anything in my life.”
     “Even us sleeping together and getting pregnant?”
     “No. I wouldn’t change it.”
     The two sat on the couch— only getting up to eat which Jeongin was proud he got her to do when the food got there. Ending up with her laying back against him, his hands rubbing her belly. A random Netflix show playing on the TV. Y/n looked down at his fingers gently drumming on her belly. For a moment, living in a little fantasy that they were a little family. 
     “You okay?” Jeongin asked
     “Yeah,” Y/n nodded, not realizing she started crying 
     “Why are you crying?” Jeongin sat up more 
     “Don’t know,” Y/n said, wiping away the tears.
     Jeongin grabbed the box of tissues from the coffee table and handed it to her. Y/n thanked him and wiped away the tears more as he rubbed her back. “You want to talk about it?”
     “No.” Y/n shook her head
     “What do you need?”
     “Think I just need to sleep.”
     Jeongin nodded and helped her up from the couch. Leading her down the hallway of the penthouse to the guest room. “Text me if you need anything. Okay? And I’m just over there if I don't reply.”
     “Thanks,” Y/n smiled and walked into the room. She closed the door behind her and sat on the bed. 
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     Y/n sighed and set her phone on the nightstand and crawled under the covers of the bed. Trying to get some sleep but she was too worried to sleep. Eventually giving up and walking down the hallway to Jeongin’s room. The door was opened and he wasn’t inside so she wandered out to the living room.
     The TV was still playing while he was sitting on the couch with his phone. He looked over as he heard her walking in. “Thought you were sleeping.”
     “Tried, can’t.”
     “You wanna talk?”
     Y/n nodded and sat next to him, “Do you think I can stay for the week? just the whole thing with—“
     “Yeah. That’s fine. I can take you to get some stuff from your place tomorrow,” Jeongin answered 
     “Thank you,” Y/n smiled 
     “Something else bugging you?” 
     “Yeah, but nothing for you to worry about.”
     “I’m going to worry either way.”
     “Just, earlier when i was crying, i got in my head for second about us being a real family. And then i remembered we weren’t together and I always thought when I got pregnant I'd be in a relationship and getting to have a family.”
     “And it’s hurting you’re not?”
     “Just a little. That’s not on you though. we agreed to co-parent and that’s that. I think it just hurts more because I’m actually starting to like you in a romantic sense but—“
     Jeongin nodded, “What if we tried?”
     “In, you don’t —“
     “I wouldn’t offer if I didn’t feel the same, Y/n.”
     “Huh?”
     “Okay,” Jeonging turned to face her, “I’d be an idiot not to admit I thought you were pretty when we were at S-class, even though we were drunk and didn’t remember anything. I’d also be dumb not to say I’ve thought about us as a family, dating and raising a kid. My family already likes you, which is a bonus. I’m not saying I'm in love because this is all fresh and it doesn’t feel like we’re there, but I do like you as more than a friend or someone I'm raising a kid with.”
     Y/n looked at him, tears welling in her eyes before she leaned for and wrapped her arms around him. Jeongin wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer. “I know you're dealing with your ex but my offer is going to stay as long as we have the baby.”
     “I wanna try,” Y/n said as she pulled away from the hug, “I’m tired of Jihyun holding onto my life when he fucks it up. I wanna move on from that.”
     “We’ll go slow then, not rush anything.” 
     “Okay,” Y/n nodded as Jeongin wiped her tears 
     “Okay,” Jeongin answered, “How about we get some sleep and go out for breakfast in the morning after getting some stuff from your place.”
     “I’d like that.”
     “Come on,” Jeongin helped her up again
     “Can you… stay with me? maybe?” Y/n asked
     “Yeah.”
     Jeongin led her to his room and let her get the bed before him. Jeongin climbed into the bed behind her and wrapped an arm around her, laying his hand on her growing stomach. Y/n smiled to herself as she laid her hand over his and closed her eyes.
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imyourbratzdoll · 2 days
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I crave a good fluffy fic with wolverine, his wife is a badass and when someone threatens him she loses her shit and kicks their ass🫡 with so much disrespect.
hey baby, I'm so sorry for taking so long! I hope you enjoy what I did, it's a bit more violent than you probably wanted.
summary - a dumb 'bad guy' lures you and your husband out, things take an escalated turn when he threatens your husband.
warning - SUPER violent, like extreme level probably, swearing, mentions of sex, dude talks of touching what's his but nothing triggering, dick and balls suffer rip.
18+ only please, the gif I use isn't mine, divider by @newlips
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You couldn’t believe this guy, he was really threatening your husband right in front of you. Thinking he was all tough because he could throw fire or some shit? You didn’t know what he could do, except talk a lot of shit. That was probably his power. What was his name again? Captain Talks Shit? Shits A lot? Little Fucker? Who cares, all you care about right now is that he’s threatening your man. 
You walk out of the shadows, having heard enough because honestly. Why do the bad guys always talk for so long? Have none of them realised or picked up from past bad guys mistakes? It was tiring and a waste of your time because you and Logan could’ve been gone by now, screwing each other silly, probably somewhere extremely risky. But, noooo. You had to listen to this jackass.
“Listen, dick licker. If you don’t stop threatening my fucking husband. I’m going to rip your arm off and beat you with it.” You growl, moving to stand in front of Logan. (Sure, he would have protected himself and it may look weak to the other guy that a woman is standing in front of an extremely large man, in more ways than one, wink wink. But you happen to know that this turns your husband on and who are you to deny him his fantasies?)
“Is that a threat?” Captain Dipshit sneers.
“Did it sound like a fucking compliment, Princess?” You watch as he eyes you, sizing you up and in his mind he’s probably thinking ‘yeah, I can take this chick.’ You hope his ego deflates before you kill him.
“Listen, Babe. This is between us men, now why don’t you run along and go make us a sandwich or something. Maybe put on some cute lingerie and wait for me in the bedroom ‘cause once I’m done with your husband here. You’ll be creamin’ around me.”
Logan shakes his head, stepping way back. He remembered when he accidentally said something similar and he was in a coma for a whole month, not even his fast healing could help him. 
It was like a switch turning on, the beast that lived within you had been released from its cage and not even God could save this man now. You stalked towards him, he still smirked thinking he was safe. You jump, wrapping your legs around his neck and twisting, bringing him down using a move your good friend Natasha had taught you. You move swiftly while he is down, sending a harsh kick to his face, hearing the satisfying crack of his nose and possibly jaw breaking. You grab him by his hair and lift him, a large grin covering your face as you bring him eye level with you. 
“You wanna repeat that, Princess?” You bring him closer, whispering in his ear. “How bout you go make me a sandwich, put on a cute set and I’ll bash your dick in with a baseball bat. How do ya like the sound of that? Cause I love it.” 
He struggles within your grip, trying to swing at you but with your other hand that isn’t gripping his hair. You snap his arms, relishing in the sound of bones breaking. His screams echo the warehouse, dumbarse had lured us in here without a backup plan or backup. 
You let go of your grip on his hair, immediately switching to gripping his throat instead. “You don’t like my plan, Princess? Rethinking the whole thing? Cause ya already pissed me off by threatening the man I love, but then you had the balls to say THAT? Tell me, Princess. Just between us girls. Did mummy not give you any hugs as a kid? Cause how did you think this was gonna go? You could’ve ‘killed’ the Wolverine, but he wouldn’t have stayed dead. No. But if he heard you touching me, touching what’s HIS. He would’ve torn you to shreds, but slowly. Very slowly. It’s what makes me love him.” You pat the man’s cheek, grinning as he winces. 
“How bout an apology and I won’t kill you.”
“F–fuck you.” He spits at you, SPITS. Not even clear fucking spit, this shit has blood in it. You lift your hand, wiping the spit with the back of it and then onto his clothes. 
Your face screwed up. “Well, that was stupid.” With quick movements, you throw him, watching him crash into a wall so hard that it leaves a dent. Your hand reaches out and a bat flies into it. “You’re not wearing that cute set and I don’t have a sandwich, but this will do.” He tries to shuffle away, his eyes wide. You stalk toward him and swing, smashing his dick and balls with one hit. Think Superman merged with Hulk strength, how do you think his twig and berries did?
A scream rips out of his mouth before his eyes roll back and he falls backwards. You frown and poke him with your bat. “Hey mista, you dead?” You look at Logan, “Bitch passed out.” He shakes his head at the pout on your lips. 
He walks over and places a kiss on your head, “C’mon, let’s go home now or better yet. You ready to do something real risky, Sweets.” Your eyes light up.
“Do you mean…?!”
Logan nods, smirking. “I’ll finally let you fuck me while I drive.” Your squeals escape as you jump into his arms, smothering his face with kisses.
“OH THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! You’re the best husband a woman could ask for!” And with that, Logan carries you out as you stare at him dreamily.
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thank you for reading!
feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.
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jenomi · 18 hours
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imgonnagetyouback
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a/n: I've been obsessed with this song from Taylor's new album and I keep imagining it with jeno </3 i hope you like it :3
cw: alcohol
✧・゚: *✧*:・゚✧
"Whether I'm gonna flip you off or Pull you into the closet, I haven't decided yet But I'm gonna get you back"
your friend had brought you to a party of one of her friends - it was a small party but not too small that you had to interact with everyone, thank god. it's only been two weeks since you and your ex, jeno, broke up. you weren't sure whether or not to go to this party, but you were in the mood to go out. your friend had insisted that you didn't need to go to this party too, but deep down, you wanted to see jeno.
when jeno had broken up with you, it caught you off guard, you had no idea his feelings had started to change. "things have changed - i just don't feel the same anymore. i'm sorry" he had said. you were so stunned, you didn't cry, you didn't even say anything at all. "i- i'm sorry" he repeated before leaving you at the front door of your house. you cried so hard that night, it hurt to open your eyes the next day. everything had been so abrupt, one second he's being sweet and the next he's saying he doesn't feel the same. he breaks it off with you in a matter of minutes, not giving you any explanation at all. you didn't know whether to be angry or sad. your mood had been volatile a week afterwards, switching from sharp pangs of sadness one minute to raging anger seconds later.
even at this party, you didn't know whether you felt sad or angry towards jeno. it didn’t help that as soon as you walked in, you locked eyes with him. it was almost like you were two magnets, bound to find each other no matter the distance. you felt your heart drop to your stomach as you quickly looked away and your friend dragged you into the kitchen to get a drink. your friend handed you a cocktail, and when she turned away to talk to donghyuck, you snuck some more alcohol into your cup.
when you stepped out of the kitchen to say hi to everyone, you tried to plaster on a smile and act like you were fine. however, every time your eyes wandered away, they would find jeno almost immediately. and sometimes he would already be looking at you.
you knew that look in his eyes - it was care. it made your heart strings pull toward him, you could feel a knot forming in your throat. you could cry. you wanted him to come up to you first, you wanted to wrap your arms around his waist, you wanted to feel his warmth on your lips.
but it made you so angry that you felt this way. what gave him the right to keep looking at you the way he used to? he knows how that look makes you feel. you felt red with anger, you wanted to hurt him the way he hurt you.
"I hear thе whispers in your eyes I'll make you wanna think twice You'll find that you were never not mine (You're mine)"
as the night went on, your two groups seemed to wander closer and closer to each other, the look in his eyes never faltering. jeno had always been very expressive, you could always read his thoughts and mood from his eyes. he looked at you the way he's looking at you now when he asked you to be his girlfriend, when you were sick, when he first told you he loved you, and every time he came home from work to see you cooking in the kitchen or relaxing on the couch.
after a year together, you learned that that caring look in his eyes was his silent way of telling you he loved you, every second of every day, in private and in public.
little did you know, jeno could read you just as easily. when he saw you walk in and lock eyes with him, he could see the shock and sadness in your eyes. it made him feel horrible. had he made a mistake? a piece of him will always belong to you the same way a piece of you will always belong to him.
the party only picked up as it got later, you could feel yourself getting tipsy and letting loose despite feeling jeno's gaze on you. some girls were trying to approach jeno, but he would politely decline them before they moved on to a different member of his group. he couldn't talk to another girl, not with you within arms reach.
he turned around to check on you again only to find you laughing with another guy. he could feel the jealousy quickly bubbling up in his veins. he had a very short debate with himself before deciding to pull you away. surely, you didn't want this guy approaching you? he's only trying to save you, that's what he thought.
"I can feel it coming, humming in the way you move Push the reset button, we're becomin' something new Say you got somebody, I'll say I got someone too"
you had no idea who this guy was. normally, you wouldn't entertain any guy you meet in a party setting, but you were feeling bold with the alcohol coursing through your veins. you could see jeno in the corner of your eye, shoulders squared and with a set jaw, walking your way.
"hi baby, i was looking for you" jeno come up to you as he smiles and wraps a possessive arm around your shoulders. he can feel you tense under his arm, making his smile fall briefly. you were suddenly wrapped in jeno's heat and his smell, just the way you yearned for every night but standing here, it doesn't feel right. the guy you were talking to looks confused as he smiles and excuses himself before walking away to grab a drink.
as soon as he walked away, you quickly stepped out of jeno's grasp looking up at him in anger. he only looks back at you before grabbing your hand and dragging you through the crowd onto the balcony. you let him, not wanting to cause a scene and because you were distracted by the familiarity of the warmth of his hand perfectly fitting in yours.
you didn't know what he was dragging you out for. you knew he wanted to talk, you can feel it in the way he's holding your hand and the heat in his step.
luckily, there wasn't anyone on the balcony when you got out there. you rip your hand away from his, "what do you want" you spat. hurt flashed across jeno's eyes before he replied, "i just wanted to talk. how are you?" you scoffed before crossing your arms and looking away as you try to tamp down your tears and anger.
"y/n..." jeno whispers when you don't respond.
"so how is she?" you ask. you figured he had found someone else and that was why he left you. it was so sudden and he gave no explanation after everything was fine in the days leading up to your breakup.
jeno looks at you in confusion before saying, "who?"
"the girl you left me for"
"what? i didn't leave you for another girl"
you feel relief wash over your body as you can feel your shoulders relaxing just the slightest. so it wasn't your worst fear, not being enough only to be replaced. you're wrapped up in your own thoughts when jeno whispers, "i've missed you"
"Told my friends I hate you, but I love you just the same Pick your poison, babe, I'm poison either way"
you stare at him in shock. had he really missed you as much as you missed him? you still loved him, you knew that no matter how much you tried to deny it - it's only been 2 weeks. but as much as you loved him, you hated him for ending it the way he did with no closure and so abruptly. if he loved you the way you loved him, he wouldn't have treated you in that way, you have enough self respect to know that.
you feel a tear slip down you cheek, but before you could swipe it away, jeno catches it with his thumb, his palm on your cheek. you instinctively lean into his touch, your heart squeezing at the familiarity of it all.
"i'm sorry. you know i hate seeing you cry. i never meant to hurt you. i'm sorry" he repeats as he caresses your cheeks with his thumbs swiping away the remaining tears running down your face. he tilts your head up towards him, and you look into his eyes with your tear filled ones. he slowly closes the gap between you as he lightly kisses you. and you kiss him back.
you let him deepen the kiss for a minute before you push him away from you. he was like a drug, poison, once it was in your system, it would be hard to get it out. always leaving you wanting more. you had just started to purge him out of your system, but he’s back and you’re left craving him harder than ever before.
but you didn't deserve this, he didn't deserve this - reconciliation without an explanation.
"Whether I'm gonna curse you out or Take you back to my house, I haven't decidеd yet But I'm gonna get you back"
"why?" you ask, but your voice only comes out as a rasp.
"i don't know" he shakes his head "i was having a hard time at work and i felt like i was letting you down. i thought you were feeling the same, so i let you go. i thought it would be easier to blame it on myself"
"what makes you think you can make those decisions for me? you just left without an explanation! you could have told me this, and i could've helped you. instead you leave me hanging, combing through everything i've done to try to figure out where i went wrong for you to have changed your feelings. you know i love you, we would've worked through it together" you cry shout.
"i know and i'm sorry! i regretted it immediately, i tried calling you but you never picked up and i tired coming by your house but you were never home when i came around" he replied. admittedly, your friend had his number blocked on your phone and you had stayed with them, unable to stay in a place filled with memories of jeno. your heart hurt knowing jeno tried to reach out to you after.
"it's not an excuse" you whisper.
the sadness on jeno's face is clear as day, "i know it doesn't excuse the way i treated you. i'll never be able to apologize enough for that and i'll never forgive myself for it. it haunts me knowing i hurt you in that way. let me make it up to you. let me show you how much i still love you. let me show you how much i care for you. let me show you how much i mean my words."
somehow this was all you wanted to hear from jeno in the last two weeks. you didn't know what to say. fuck you? but you settled with, "i need time"
jeno nodded quickly, grabbing your hand. he felt hopeful. he pulled you into a hug, "all the time you need. i'll get you back"
"me too" you whisper into his shoulder.
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b4kuch1n · 10 months
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dip pen ink comm round 3! for one Bakugames, one Mouse, and one Sol
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phantomrose96 · 1 year
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So I know this isn't anything that like actually needs an apology but it'll make me feel a bit better to say it. Oof whoops this ABoT chapter is super late. Timing kinda sucks since I wanted to have some updates out while s3 was airing but
Been kinda mega busy and stressed since October with the whole condo buying thing which rolled right into immediate day 0 plumbing and boiler issues I had to get fixed and general moving hassle and financial commitment stress and I kinda just fried myself hard. Plus then acclimating to a new place without my familiar street or familiar grocery store or familiar room or any of that. Like there's no "just go home and take your mind off it" to this cuz home is the "it". So I'm just kinda enduring until I can calm the hell down.
And anyway I definitely have progress on ch47, like 7000-ish words of it, but it's the kind of like "there is writing there" and hasn't exactly hit the "there is substance there" that I want ABoT chapters to be. Like this in particular is a chapter I want to be good, not just be done. So it's taking time to get my brain somewhere that can do that.
#anyway#i mean just in case anyone was like wondering if its discontinued to anything#its still going i just can't make it Good quite yet#(plus i need to get furniture cuz as it stands the place is really quite empty and bare except for like my room and the kitchen)#(also the bank had my address wrong so they havent been able to send me any of the mortgage information which was technically due already)#(ive been in contact with them but it's a whole thing)#(plus im still not quite finished with all the utility switching. i still need to get water in my name)#(and the boiler issue fucked up my gas bill so now ive got a crazy high gas bill i just need to... pay)#(i have actually started seeing a therapist but thats a whole other Thing now figuring out insurance and deductables and using my HSA#account and just... it's a lot)#(oh also my homeowner's insurance policy number doesn't actually work for getting me into the online portal. and the geico guy said he was#looking into it but I havent heard anything in a while)#(its a lot im just gonna melt for a while i guess)#(plus all the upfront stress has made it really hard to associate the new place as 'home' instead of 'place of great many plumbing evils')#(i sat on like 4 million couches this week and the only one i really really like probably doesn't quite fit in my living room)#(the downstairs neighbors tv is too loud and i need to talk to her about it in a way which isn't 'hey im holding on by a thread and this#one small inconvenience is the thing which is making me turn into ash')#(oh thats right i have to go pay my january HOA dues...)#(oh also I need to file for the owner-occupied tax exemption thing now that its 2023)#anyway......... ill be normal eventually. im just not normal right now.#chrissy speaks
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aro-aizawa · 7 months
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i had thought i put apple behind me.... but alas my old nemesis.....
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yuribalisms · 1 year
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I hate my gender I hate it I hate my gender this is fucking stupid I hate it I hate it I hate it could I be literally anything fucking else I’m so goddamn sick of this
#I’m like 99.9999999% sure I am genderfluid#which is all great and fine when I go like literal months#being perfectly happy and content being feminine and being called a girl and enjoying she/her pronouns#until all of a sudden I’m just vibing on the couch last night and the dysphoria just fucking SLAMMED into me#and it was so Fucking Stupid too I just saw a buff shirtless male video game character and my brain was like#‘kinda bullshit you don’t look like that huh’#and now I hate everything and I get my five millionth ‘am I trans man’ crisis#except at this point I KNOW I’m not cuz this is the pattern#I’ll be uncomfortable for several months like two ppl I know will use he/him pronouns for me and I’ll enjoy it#and then eventually I’ll decide THAT now makes me uncomfortable and I’ll go back to either hyperfem or androgyny#whichever is scratching the itch at the time#and I’m so…. so fucking sick of this pattern#cuz say I DID do anything to transition then whenever I inevitably wanted to look like a woman it’d be the same thing just reveresed#AAAAHGGGHHHHHHHH#I want it to stop I want stable feelings about gender one way or the other this is so fucking stupid and unfair#I hate it I hate it I hate it#this is the worst way to experience gender ever I literally can do NOTHING about it#and these intense switches are just gonna keep happening#like idk at least I’m self aware enough I’ve figured out the pattern but honestly I think that kinda makes it worse in a way#androgyny is my go to and has definitely never made me feel Bad#but life certainly is fucking easier when I’m happy with and leaning into being more fem aligned than masc aligned#bye I’m gonna go die in a hole now#kaz rambles
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monstertsunami · 2 years
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gonna work on reformatting my pafl webshrine when i get homeee
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britishchick09 · 2 years
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i finally figured out the box 5/3 situation! :D
my best friend suggested that box 5 could be a decoy and box 3 is reserved under a different name so no one would catch the opera ghost. that’s so clever and so erik! ;)
but what would his fake name be? i was thinking it could be a poto adaptation reference like kristin claudin devereaux is but then i remembered a part in the book...
“Oh, I see…” Meg said as Christine moved her back. “You’re a huge dork named Walter Plinge.”
walter plinge is a janitor who’s secretly the opera ghost in the discworld book ‘maskerade’. it’s also a british theater pseudonym used when it’s not desirable to make an actor's real name known or if an actor is playing two parts. meg probably wouldn’t know of british theater, but you know who would? the ghost playing 2 parts! ;D
but if the opera ghost gets his salary in box 5 and erik- i mean walter plinge is in box 3, how does he fetch it? does he go through the doors like a normal person? of course not! ghosts go through walls...
and the opera ghost goes through mirrors ;)
mirrors in the rewrite aren’t doors to another world like in the book/musical and are more like video chat cameras. but what if the mirror in box 5 can reveal a secret passageway to box 3?
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the plush border around the mirror makes taking it off possible! ;)
so congrats rewrite erik, box 3 is your box after all! ;D
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...and so is the ever iconic box 5 ;)
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nazumichi · 2 years
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omg the lineart *tucks hair behind ear* it’s multiplying 😳😳
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crowswarm · 7 months
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🕷
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volensnolenss · 9 days
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𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐅𝐔𝐍
summary: you can't wait any longer, so you let your older brother's best friend fuck you;
content: nsfw!mdni, suguru is your older brother; doggy, missionary, creampie, praising;
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“fuck- satoru” you’re gasping, your fingers are gripping the sheets as his cock harshly thrusting into you, “baby, stop whimpering” his head is bent towards you, and you can feel his gloating smile, “are you my good girl mmm?” he's cooing and you’re nodding, feeling how deep gojo is and he just smirked, “so proud of you, princess.”
you always teased satoru when he came to your house with suguru. you liked to casually walk past them in one of your short outfits, which is why gojo switched his focus of attention to you. and, of course, suguru noticed this by giving him a steely glance, which satoru just grinned at.
every time you looked at him with your angelic smile, he wasn't exactly touched, rather, he wanted to know what was hiding behind it.
his palm made its way and he squeezed your waist without slowing down. you feel his veiny fat cock pounding your soaking walls leaving wet slaps.
“how do you think suguru will react if he sees us?” he kisses your shoulder, barely biting the skin, you moan and your back is against to his wide chest, “hate you-” gojo just chuckled and sank his cock deeper, causing you to cry out a little, his tip is adjacent to your tight cunt.
satoru grabbed your chin and stifled your moans with a kiss. he feels your fat tears flowing down your cheeks. your mind is not focused on anything except the tension in your lower abdomen.
“you’re so pretty, baby” his cock gradually throbs in you, still inexorably shaking your walls. satoru's voice vibrates, feeling you shrink “someone's gonna cum?”
“i'm close, satoru, i can’t” you feel a tingling sensation in your limbs and sigh loudly, succumbing to satoru, who presses you close to him and grunts under his breath, “so good, so good” he cum, filling you up to the very edge and loosing his grip on you.
you rolled over on your back, your eyelashes glistening with tears. satoru approaches you, covering your body with his, “my sugar” he kisses your neck and before reaching your chest, gojo stumbled and looked at you “wanna feel you again” you're meowing by moving your hips. your clenching pussy touches his red sensitive tip and he bites his lips.
“if suguru knew what you really are,” he grins, stroking your thigh, “he would be amazed by you.” gojo spread your thighs and he saw a beautiful sight on your pussy stuffed with his cum. He can't get the idea out of his head that you're so cute looking like that.
“i'm not a child” your sullenness disappears momentarily when every inch of his cock is pushed into you again, “i see, i see” gojo whispers to you, putting his finger to your half-open mouth. you and he heard footsteps and soon a voice calling you.
“hey, what have you been doing in your room for so long?” suguru is talking to you and you see the door handle move.
“don't come in!-” his cock completely sinks into you, causing you to lose your temper.
“what? what’s going on?”
“i'm-i'm changing!” you can hardly pronounce and cover your mouth with your palm while satoru is stretching into you.
suguru lets go of the door handle in disbelief and leaves, “I'm waiting for you.” you stopped listening to him and completely surrendered to gojo. you already didn't care about anything when his cock hits your pampered and sensitive places perfectly, which makes you breathe shallowly.
“fuck, angel, you're driving me crazy" he grabs you by the hips, frantically and sloppily bumping into you. you sigh softly, casting an innocent glance at satoru with your eyes, savoring the traces of the outgoing ograsm
his muscles are strained to the very limit and every time he penetrated you, his cock was covered with cum, ”wait- shit, gonna fill you up again” he groaned and you dig your nails into his skin, feeling the spreading warmth.
gojo drapes your leg over his shoulder, stroking and kissing it. his voice sounds hoarse, but he still tries to be gentle in front of you.
“now distract your brother so that i can get out of here alive.”
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