#v: i was never cut out for prom queen

[lillypad910]

Chocolate Cake Milkshakes

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Chubby!Girly!F!Reader

Word count: 2450

Warnings: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!! Smut, protected sex, p in v, fingering, oral (f receiving), pet names (Sweetheart, Princess), parent/child favoritism that’s not reader, perfect older sibling and disappointment younger child dynamic (only for a bit), a little bit of fat shamming. Not proof read, sorry for errors!

Summary: You have a date with your boyfriend Eddie Munson, who, like the gentleman he is, picks you up from home. Your mom favors your sister once again but you don’t let it deter you from the dinner your boyfriend takes you on at Benny’s for your favorite shakes and the rest of the date spent in his van by the lake.

A/n: for my fellow chubby girls that get told they don’t need that milkshake, or can’t wear that dress, or eat like a child. You are seen, and you are PERFECT. Be that main character I know you are.

All images found on Pinterest

Eddie couldn’t help but feel excited as he pulled his van into your driveway. His heart pounding in his chest as he stepped out of the still turned on vehicle before walking up to your front door. After a single push of the doorbell, the obnoxious ringing being heard even from outside, your door swings open. Your mother stood before him, smiling.

“Why hello, Eddie!” She greets him, “Come in, (y/n) should be ready in a moment.” She opens the door wider to let the tall boy in.

Your mother is a known individual among the residents of Hawkins, being an ex cheerleading captain when she was in her prime. Still to this day she has kept her shape.

Eddie sits in the living room on the plush plaid couch, glancing around the room. He had been to your house a few times already, but never explored. He’s always just snuck in through your window at night after your parents had gone to bed, so he takes the opportunity to look around.

There are pictures all around the room of your parents and your older sister, Stacy, but he notices fairly quickly how there are significantly less pictures of you. He sees the pictures of Stacy in the Hawkins Pageant, winning first place every time, her cheerleading photos, her photo as prom Queen and her graduation photo, but the only pictures he sees of you are you with the rest of the family. Specifically one catches his eye, you were a lot younger, maybe three or four. You were standing in front of the water at the beach, your hands in the sand as your swimsuit top’s strap was hanging off your shoulder.

“Mom, have you seen my pearl necklace? I can’t find-” you step into the living room, stopping when you see Eddie. You had on a cute dress that flowed out after your waist, cutting off at your knees. “Oh! I didn’t know you were already here! I’ll be ready in just a second, I’m sorry to keep you waiting!” You hold up your hands defensively before walking into your kitchen. “What was that, dear?” Your mother asks. “My pearl necklace, do you know where it is? I can’t find it-” she cuts you off before you can finish, “Oh! Yes, Stacy has it, she asked if she could borrow it from you last week, I guess she hasn’t brought it back yet.” Your mom simply smiles, unfazed by your smile dropping.

“What? Mom, I told you I don’t like her using my jewelry! That was Granny’s! She gave it to me-!” “Well, Stacy wanted it, you know I can’t say no to her, dear.” You sigh, being reminded like always that Stacy’s wants are more important than your own. “Now run along and finish getting ready, you’re making poor Eddie wait on you for too long. Also,” your mother glances at Eddie before turning back to you and looking you up and down, “are you sure you want to wear that dress? I mean…” she leans over and pats at your stomach.

Your eyes widen and you subconsciously suck in your belly. “I… I thought it was cute…” you try to defend your decision. “If you say so…” your mother goes back to making dinner for herself and your father. You sigh before running back upstairs to find a different necklace.

You don’t bother changing, thinking your mom was just being how she usually is. That’s until you stand in front of your mirror one final time, noticing the subtle chub of your stomach poking out of the loose fabric of your dress. But before you can even begin to pick out another dress, you remind yourself you have a poor boy downstairs waiting on you, with your mother.

You enter the living room once more, smiling at the lanky guy on your couch. “Sorry,” his head snaps in your direction when you speak. “Ready to go?” He asks you, standing up from the couch. You nod, and your mom comes running in. “You two have fun! Eddie, make sure to have her home by 11, please.” Eddie nods, “Yes, ma’am, I will.” You both leave, and as you step out of the door frame, Eddie’s fingers intertwine with yours, making you smile.

“So,” you speak once the door shuts behind you, “Where ‘re we going tonight?” He looks back at you and smiles, “I was thinking going to Benny’s for food before heading to the lake? Wayne’s off tonight so I don’t really wanna go back to my place.” His face flushes at the inclination. “Sounds good!” You smile, walking up to his van, “I’ve honestly been craving one of Benny’s chocolate cake milkshakes, those things are diabetes in a cup but they are so good!”

When you both make it to the diner, Benny greets you with a smile, “Good to see you two again,” he pours some coffee into the mug of one of the costumers at the counter before making is way over to you as you both slid into a booth by the windows. “Always happy to have regulars! Let me guess, two chocolate cake shakes and a double quarter pounder with cheese, extra fries” he says pointing at Eddie, “and a 6 piece tender basket with honey, buttered toast, and cheese curds?” he points at you. You both smile as Eddie leans over the table to you, “do we seriously come here that much?” You can’t help but laugh. “Apparently.”

When the food is brought out to you, you both dig in quickly. “I swear I will never get over this shake,” you say, leaning back into the booth’s cushion as you suck up the delicious chocolatey goodness from the large straw. Eddie nods, shoving fry that he dipped into the whipped topping into his mouth. “For real, you’ll have to beg him for the recipe one day.”

Eddie watches you sit the glass down, before ripping a tender in half and dipping it into the sauce cup of honey, quickly shoving the steaming chicken into your mouth. The soft hum that escapes you as your body sways side to side, eyes closing out of pure glee from the taste of the food.

Eddie was always happy watching you eat, from your little dances to excited squeals when the food was placed in front of you, he never got tired of it. He loved seeing you all happy.

After the plates were emptied and your shakes sucked down, Eddie went up to the counter to pay, leaving you alone to suck the last remaining drops of your shake. When he returns, he laughs as he watches you suck up the air in the glass, aggressively trying to get whatever you could out. You finally sit the glass down, “ok I’m done.” He chuckles and holds out his hands, which you take, and he helps pull you out of the booth.

You both drive down to the lake, heads banging to his new cassette tape by Metallica, his long curly hair whipping around as you giggle. “Eddie!” You laugh, trying to fix his hair when he finally stops, getting it out of his face so he can actually see.

When you pull into the lake, the sun has already set and he turns to you, “So,” he smiles, suddenly all sheepish. “What do you- hey!” You quickly unbuckle and squeeze yourself to the back of the van. His litter of blankets and pillows cover the hard surface of the folded back seats and his trunk floor. “Oh come on, Munson, don’t look at me like that.” You place your chubby cheek against the side of the headrest of your original seat. He unbuckles, that cute toothy grin on his face, before shoving himself in between the seats with you. You giggle as you pull him through, grabbing at his arm and pulling towards yourself.

When he flops through, falling with his back flat onto the bed of the van, you quickly lean over him. Your lips interlock, his arms quickly grabbing at your waist and pulling you on top of him. At first you’re hesitant, not wanting to put all your weight on the scrawny guy, but he quickly pushing your arms out from under you, making you fall flat on him.

“Eddie..!” You giggle when he kisses across your nose and cheeks. “What?” He pulls away, his brown doe eyes staring back at you. You huff, faking annoyance as you sit up, and lay your back against the side of his van. “Sweetheart,” he flips over and crawls to you, his hands brushing up your legs, as he smiles up at you, before lowering himself down to place soft kisses on your left knee. “Don’t be mad at me,” he smirks, obviously knowing you’re not actually mad at him.

His lips graze over your legs, placing soft kisses down your thighs, getting closer and closer to where you want him. “Eds…” you lower your hand down to cup his cheek as his corse fingers ride up your thighs, pushing your dress up to reveal your panties for him.

“You’re already all wet for me, Princess,” he brushes his thumb against the edge of your panties by your right inner thigh, his other hand squeezing at the fat of your left thigh. You blush, your breath suddenly getting heavy as you breathe harder. He hooks his finger around your underwear, pulling them down your legs before dropping them into the front seat. “So pretty.” He stares down at your slit, his fingers pulling your folds open. You watch him lick his lips, making you whimper. “Eds,” he looks up at you, pupils all dilated, that lovely brown color now just black. He moves closer to you, leaving a soft kiss to your cheek before leaving one on your neck. He lowers himself down lifting your legs to be over his shoulders as he goes below your dress.

You moan as his tongue moves over your folds, lapping up around your entrance. “E-Eddie…!” You gasp as his fingers dig into your hips, creating small crescents in your fat. His tongue moves slow at first, licking stripes from your slit to your clit, before flattening over your cunt. His nose brushes into your clit and you gasp, reaching down and grabbing at his hair. “S-Shit…! Eddie…!” You moan when his tongue plunged into you, spreading you open.

He pulls his tongue away only replacing it with two fingers, thrusting them into you slowly while his mouth returns to your clit. You mewl over the sensation, your legs shaking as your thighs press against the sides of his head.

His hips start grinding into the bed of his trunk, trying to get any kind of friction he can. You grip tighter at his hair, holding him in place as you come undone on his tongue, gasping for air as your vision goes white.

Eddie pulls away from you, his fingers leaving your cunt to your annoyance. “Did…” he tries to catch his breath, “did I do good?” You laugh airily, still having your brain a bit fuzzy from the orgasm he just gave you. “Holly shit, Eds. Yes.” You reach out to him and pull him closer to you, pressing your lips to his. He kisses back eagerly, the taste of you still on his lips and chin.

“Eds, I need you,” you pull away from his lips, placing soft kisses down his neck. He groans at the attention. “Fuck… ok, I know.” He pulls away for a moment, reaching into his front seat and opening the glove compartment. He comes back into view opening a condom out of the foil. He unbuckles his jeans before pulling down his boxers. You will never get over the utter size this skinny boy is when his cock smacks against his stomach.

Eddie rolls the condom down on himself, before grabbing at your thighs and lifting your legs. Your breath hitches as he presses his tip against you. You stare up at him, reaching up and cupping his face, before pulling him closer for another sloppy kiss.

You moan as his cock pushes in you, flattening your palms against the base of his neck. You nosed brush against each other as you breathe against his lips, “fuck…” he groans, placing his hands firmly on your waist, pulling you closer, letting you bottom out on his dick. “S-shit, just sitting like this feels good.” You laugh a bit, laying your head on his shoulder as he pulls you away from the side of the van, laying you against the floor of the trunk.

You moan when he starts moving, his hips softly thrusting into you, not wanting to overpower you just yet. “Shit…” he leans over you, your legs up around his waist as his are folded by your hips, constrained by the small space. “Eddie…” you moan into his ear, making him start thrusting faster. He groans, finding your hands in his before pressing them into the pillow by your head. “Fuck… you feel so good, Sweetheart.” He moans, beginning to thrust harder.

You both gasp and moan as he thrusts into you. Before long his thrusts get sloppy, and his hands drop yours, moving down to your hips, now pushing you down against his cock. “E-Eddie…!” You grip at his shoulders, both of your bodies sweating from the vans heating and the body heat you are both creating.

“God, fuck… need you to cum again, baby, please? Wanna feel you cum all over my cock.” He moves one hand in between you both, rubbing his thumb against your clit. You gasp, feeling your orgasm get closer and closer. You whimper as he leans down and kisses you again, your stomach pressing into his. You tits and belly fat rock with his thrusts, his fingers rolling your clit as you come undone around his cock. He groans at the feeling as your pussy flutters around him, his thrusts getting harder. “Eddie…!” You gasp, your post orgasm unable to come down from the high.

Almost immediately, Eddie drops his head on your shoulder, his hair damp from his sweat as he finishes.

For a moment, you both just lay there, entangled legs and arms around each other, bodies squished in the confines of his van’s trunk. You run your fingers through your hair. “You ok there, Eds?” You ask, a small giggle leaving you. “Yeah,” he sighs, “yeah, just… Need a second.” He presses his nose into you neck, leaving soft kisses on your skin. “Not gonna lie to ya, Sweetheart, you kinda tasted like one of those milkshakes.”

Tag list

@cagethemunson @spikeybatt @cherrycolas-things

[chickensarentcheap]

Never Gonna Be Alone- Chapter 43

Title: Revelations

Warnings: profanity, angst

Tagging: @c-a-v-a-l-r-y, @alievans007, @innerpaperexpertcloud, @miss-smutty, @tragiclyhip​

He’s out the door by five thirty in the morning; leaving behind the warmth and the comfort of his home and making the five block trek to the Hudson River. With no fresh snowfall, the sidewalks and streets are remarkably clear; milder than normal temperatures slowly melting the waist high banks and turning patches of ice into puddles of muck and slush. His strides are long and purposeful. Soles of his runners crunching as they pass over neatly and tightly packed snow; following the foot tracks that earlier pedestrians have left behind. Chin tucked into his chest and his hands shoved in the pockets of his hoodie; anxious to get to his destination and start the day off in the right frame of mind. The headphones worn over a black beanie render him oblivious to sounds of life taking place around him ; the pounding of the music blocking out the sounds of traffic and the rattles and bangs that accompany the city garbage trucks. While he doesn’t make eye contact with those he passes, he notices the nods of greeting; meeting them with the brief turning up of the corner of the mouth and a slight head nod of acknowledgment. It’s what he enjoys most about the area and what eventually sold him on the idea of buying the brownstone; people are friendly enough to smile or offer a quick ‘good morning’, but don't possess enough curiosity to actually stop and speak.

He’s never been a social butterfly. Popular in high school, he’d blended in easily with the ‘jocks’ simply because of his athletic prowess and fairly good looks; girls wanted to date him, guys wanted to befriend him and hang out and attend beach parties. And while he’d followed the mantra ‘fake it until you make it’ and managed to stay quietly on the sidelines, he’d never been entirely comfortable with his status as one of the ‘cool kids’. The guy who’d get irritated when his buddies would make fun of the less popular kids; easily flying off the handle and calling them out on their shit if they said anything degrading towards the special needs students or dared to lob sexual comments towards females. He’d felt more in tune with the ‘loners’; the ones who’d hang out in the back of the cafeteria with their noses shoved in books or who’d eat their lunch sitting in front of their lockers.

It’s how he’d met his ex wife; a newly arrived grade nine student whose family had just moved Port Douglas from Perth. Taller than most females he’d ever encountered, she’d had a thicker build that both guys and girls consistently made fun of; broad shoulders and muscular legs and well defined arms. Shy and soft spoken and never making eye contact with anyone in the hall; thick, wavy blond hair falling over her face as she ignored the whispers and the stares and kept her books and binders clutched tightly to her chest. He’d been the first student to approach her; the last football player to leave practice and finding her sitting on a curb outside of school, waiting for a ride that was running late. And she’d seemed both stunned and terrified when he actually spoke to her; standing above her still clad in his now muddy and sweat soaked practice gear, helmet tucked under one arm and his backpack slung over a shoulder. Introducing himself and offering both a hand in greeting and a ride home; quickly discovering that she had a beautiful smile and the most stunning green eyes he’d ever seen. And she’d made him feel things that none of the other girls ever had; never experiencing that immediate and intriguing spark with any of the prom queens or the cheerleaders that he’d attempted relationships with in the past.

“I know who you are,” she’d said, nervously tucking her hair behind her ears. It had shimmered in the sunlight; the lightest and most beautiful shade of blond that he’d ever laid eyes on. “Everyone talks about you. You’re like the most popular guy in school. Yet you don’t act like that. You’re not a total ass to people. You’re different.”

It had been the first time that anyone had ever told him that. Truly believing that the company he’d kept had painted him in a far different light. Guilty by association because those he hung around were boisterous and crude; convinced that being good at sports meant they ran the school and didn’t have to show respect to anyone. And it had made him feel good; being seen as kind and compassionate doing wonders for his ego in a way no touchdown or goal scored ever could.

She’d accepted his ride home that night. And the request for a date before she slipped out of the car. Two weeks later they were inseparable and considered themselves ‘exclusive’; holding hands in the hall and having lunch together every day and spending nearly every waking hours outside of school with one another. He was convinced that he met the love of his life and that she’d be the one he’d marry and have a family with. Grow old with.

It had started out well; a brief engagement and married only a week after graduation. She’d been certain she could handle the life of a soldier's wife; he was new to the military but extremely committed and determined to make a lifelong career out of it. And for the most part they’d been happy; a little house not far from his home base, a tight circle of both military and civilian friends, the honeymoon stage lasting well into the second year. Everything changed once he received his first deployment; eight weeks in Afghanistan that quickly turned into six months. When he’d returned home, he’d begun hearing the rumours; she was angry at his absence and his inability to call home on a regular basis and sought solace in the arms of not just one man, but many. He hadn’t wanted to believe it, and she’d been convincing when he’d confronted her about it; pledging her undying love for him and assuring him -with both words and her body- that he was the only man that she’d wanted.

He’d been an idiot. For years. So smitten that he hadn’t wanted to accept the truth and refused to walk away; seeing her as his ‘be all and end all’ and not wanting things to come to an end. He DID love her. Probably a lot more than she had ever loved him. He’d been so terrified of abandonment, that he’d held on even tighter; he’d lost the only other woman he’d ever loved at a very early age and couldn’t stand the thought of losing Sarah too. So he put up with it; sticking by her side no matter how many notches on the bedposts she lodged and no matter how rampant the rumours and the gossip became. Soon that love turned into resentment and sheer tolerance. Letting her live her ‘double life’; pretending to be a happy and adoring couple in public yet knowing she was off running around behind his back the second he was shipped off for a tour. His drinking became a problem; booze numbing the heartache and the loneliness and giving him an escape from the miserable reality of his life. And he’d been a week removed from filing for divorce when the pregnancy test came back; she was expecting a baby and she was adamant it was his despite all the evidence that told him there was no way he could possibly be the father. He couldn’t leave her like THAT. He’d be viewed as the bad guy; the asshole that had ended his marriage WHILE his wife was pregnant. So he’d changed his plans; vowing that he’d stay by her side no matter what and that he’d be the best father and family man he could possibly be.

He’d been in Iraq when Austin was born; informed of his son’s arrival while in Mosul and immediately sent home. And he’d known right away that the kid wasn’t his the second he’d looked at him; not a single feature that could be attributed to either father OR mother. But it hadn’t mattered. The second he’d held Austin in his arms and all of those tiny fingers had curled around just one of his, Tyler had made his decision; he’d stick around and be the boy’s daddy and love him a way he never thought it was possible to love another human being. He’d be the kind of father his kid could one day brag about; attentive and patient and compassionate. Never would he be like his old man. He would cut back on his drinking and get help with his anger management issues and his wife would never have to worry if he’d wander and find someone else; throwing himself one hundred percent into their marriage and in raising a family together. Even if it meant that he’d never be truly happy and that she’d continue her dalliances whenever he was stationed overseas. He’d stay committed to her no matter what; his son never having to grow up without both parents under the same roof or suffer from the trauma of being from a broken home.

The cancer had changed everything. The stress behind caring for a terminally ill child had brought out both his and Sarah’s true sides; they didn’t love each other and could barely stand being in the same room together and all of the pretending and the faking was just wearing them down and making things even worse. But he’d admired her; her commitment to caring for their rapidly deteriorating son, the steadfast determination to beat it ‘no matter what’, and the rock solid courage she displayed when it was evident Austin’s time on earth was coming to an end. And despite her mistakes and her failures as a wife, she HAD deserved better. She had needed a man that would support her; someone that would hold her while she cried and lift her up during the especially dark and trying times and would be by her side during funeral preparations. He’d failed her; running away when things became too painful to witness. And in the end, he’d failed his son as well. Leaving him alone and scared; his final moments on earth spent wondering what he’d ever done to make his father hate him THAT much.

It’s been seventeen years and sometimes it hurts just as much as it did the moment he got the news. The loss still painful and immense; a part of his heart forever torn out of his chest and never able to be put back into place. And it isn’t just the unexplainable and often unbearable sorrow that comes with losing a child; so powerful and pronounced it can bring even the toughest of men to their knees. It’s the guilt and the regret that continue to haunt and eat away at him; silent and waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike. It comes when he’s at his lowest; when the combined mental illnesses are rearing their ugly heads and threatening to drag him down. That’s when the voices come out to play; the cruel and the degrading whispers in his ears that insist he’s EXACTLY the monster that he’s made himself out to be. The kind that abandons those he loves when the going gets tough; physically brave, but an emotional coward. They remind him not only of the mistake he’d made with Austin but those he’d committed within the last twelve and a half years; the lies he told and the promises he broke and the times he raised his voice or put a fist through a wall. The moments he’d slipped and given in to his addictions; the fear of being a failure as a husband and father pushing him to not only the job, but the bottle and the pain meds as a form of coping and a means of escape.

Normally he’s able to fight those voices off; years of therapy -and an extremely patient and attentive wife- helping him develop healthy coping mechanisms. The water remains his favourite and most successful form of escape; the familiar scent of salt that hangs heavily in the air, the sounds of the waves as they roll up onto the shore, the sun's powerful and often punishing rays glistening on the rippling surface of the ocean. Sometimes it’s a couple hours spent surfing; the feel of the wind against his face and crispness of the water that seems to cleanse his very soul. There’s days where it’s as simple as a walk along the ocean line; the water lapping at his ankles, wet sand cushioning and moulding around his feet. Or a hike through the forest across from their home. Taking a well beaten path that snakes and winds through the dense gathering of trees and leads to a small clearing; a small wooden staircase he’d erected shortly after they’d moved into the house giving access to a patch of pristine, white beach. It’s a tiny piece of solitude; tucked away and unseen from even the edge of their main property. And they’ve ventured there together many times; taking along that faded and tattered plaid blanket and a picnic lunch and taking advantage of every minute of quality time granted to them. Reconnecting in many ways; playful bantering and light hearted teasing, deep and emotional chats revolving their respective childhoods and the shared loss of the only parent that had loved either of them. Even after twelve and half years there’s never a lull in conversation; always something new and long buried that’s brought to the surface and finally shared after decades of locking it away. It’s never boring when they’re together; a strong friendship and a unique and powerful bond -cemented during that difficult and terrifying time nearly thirteen years ago- serving as a stable foundation for everything else built upon it.

The riverfront is quiet. A half a dozen dog walkers and one lone jogger. The latter a middle aged woman in top of the line athletic gear that he’s encountered a handful of times over the past three years and always offers him a warm smile and a nod in greeting. He pauses at the railing; checking for any missed calls or text messages and taking his time to stretch and warm up. The body feels good today; the stiffness and the pain minimal, the warmer than usual temperatures keeping any arthritis flare ups at bay. There’s a distinct connection between his physical condition and his mental one. When his body feels healthy and he’s able to skip the daily cocktail of pain meds and exercises learned during physio, his mental condition isn’t as fragile. The burden of stress and torment that normally sits upon his shoulders suddenly seeming so much lighter; the usually bottomless and fermented wound in a long ago broken heart not seeming so gaping or festering. He feels energized and renewed; a deep and peaceful sleep and a pain free morning making him feel as if he’s prepared -mentally and physically- to take on the world. It’s still there; the black cloud of depression that hangs over him. But it doesn’t seem so ominous or menacing; those slivers of hope and positivity managing to sneak through.

He takes a moment to relish the view. The peek of the sun on the horizon, the glistening of the snow and the chunks ice that have taken up inhabitance on the surface of the Hudson, the faint glimmer that plays off the windows of the skyscrapers in the distance. There’s moments where he’s truly content here; enjoying the change of pace and admiring the vast differences between New York City and home. Today is one of those days; he feels secure in both where he is and WHO he is. A welcomed outsider as opposed to a strange and mysterious interloper. It’s a reminder that home is wherever his heart lies. His wife and his children sound asleep; warm and safe in their beds only blocks away.

SHE’S his heart; the person that came into his life and turned his world upside down and reminded him that he was still very much alive and had so much more living left to do. Showing him -for the first time in thirty five years- what it was like to be TRULY loved; wholly and completely and unconditionally. Someone so bright eyed and light in heart and spirit; managing to love life and everyone in it despite all of the pain and the suffering that they’d been put through. Giving him what he’d hadn’t even realized he needed; a normal life with everything familiar and mundane and domestic that came with it. Someone to wake up to in the morning; a sleepy smile and soft lips against his own, hands reaching for him and a warm body pressing against his. Going to bed with them every night; those remaining conversations that take place in a darkened, quiet room and the intimacy shared and the love and appreciation expressed.

Once more removing his phone from his pocket, he selects a different playlist and jacks the volume up on his headphones; drowning out the world around him and concentrating on nothing but breaking a sweat and pushing his body to its limits.

*****

It’s shortly after seven when he returns to Gramercy Park. Layers of clothing sticking to sweat soaked skin, beanie long discarded and shoved in his pocket; hair damp and sticking up in several different directions. The tips of his ears and his cheeks flushed from both the chill in the air and the effort and energy he’d put into his run; slow and steady at first, then legs and arms pumping as hard and powerfully as they possibly could. He feels invigorated; a level of energy and exuberance that he hasn’t encountered in weeks. Maybe even months. And it’s a welcome change. Feeling healthy AND content at the same time.

Before returning home he stops at the bodega at the end of the street; filling a basket with the various items Tanner had scrawled onto a post-it note he’d found attached to the fridge. The kid never fails to both surprise and amaze him; constantly finding recipes or ‘science experiments’ on the internet and always insisting on trying his hand at them. Forever curious; holding onto that innocence and that joy and wonder for far longer than any of his older siblings ever had. Phenomenally intelligent and talented; teaching himself how to play the guitar and the piano by ear, his paintings and drawings always appearing as if they’re done by someone so much older and possessing an experienced eye. Emotionally mature and wise, but socially lagging; unable to form friendships and constantly feeling awkward surrounded by groups of people and easily overwhelmed by too much activity and noise. Yet so empathetic and compassionate; easily and powerfully feeling other peoples’ emotions and his moods and behaviour dictated by the mere energies people give off when around him.

The bodega owner greets him with a broad smile and a friendly nod when he approaches the counter. A first name and very few details kind of friendship; Frank the sole proprietor and only full time employee since the store’s opening forty years ago. Short and stocky; a headful of curly salt and pepper hair and a thick moustache and a heavy Bronx accent. Both know very little about the other; talk mostly revolving around the weather and current events and Frank’s never ending curiosity about life in Australia and his overwhelming desire to visit and one day retire there.

“Alone today,” Frank comments, and moves to the small coffee bar -nothing more than a handful of machines and containers for milk and cream- behind the register. It’s an understanding between them; Tyler never needing to ask and Frank knowing his standing order. “That doesn’t happen often. Normally you’ve got at least one or two rug rats hanging off ya.”

“Gotta sneak out when I can.” He empties the contents of the basket onto the counter; the latter he stores in the rack at the end of the counter. “How’s business?”

“Quiet. Same thing every Christmas. The elite like to get away. They’re going to where you’re from, and your kind are coming here. Must be quite the culture shock, huh? Going from the sand and the sun to this crap?” It’s a typical conversation starter; the same opening question Tyler’s been asked every single visit for three years running.

“It’s a change, that’s for sure. Can’t say I wouldn’t rather be back in the sand and the sun. But…”

“But the kiddos and the sweetheart like it. I get it. When my daughter moved to Phoenix with her husband about ten years back, she insisted on coming back here every Christmas. Missed the cold and the white shit too much. Who the hell is crazy enough to miss THAT?”

“Wife says it’s the magic of the season. Wants the kids to experience it. White Christmas and all that. And they enjoy it; skating, sledding, snowball fights, all of that crap. If they’re happy, I’m happy.”

“I hear ya there. Makes a man’s life much more easy and relaxed, that’s for sure. If the littles and the wife are happy, things are a lot more pleasant, know what I’m saying?. They all doing well?”

“No complaints. Got spoiled at Christmas, Aunt’s coming to visit today, big brother’s getting married in three days…”

“Busy, busy. Not rest for the weary. How’s that cute little wife of yours?”

“Still little. Still cute.”

“How you holding up? Must be hard being away from home. From what you’re used to.”

“I miss it,” Tyler admits, and nods his appreciation for the coffee that’s set down in front of him; black, no sugar. “It’ll be nice to get back. It’s quieter there. No one really around. Just our own slice of paradise. Private. Just the way I like it.”

“You definitely are a stickler for your privacy, aren’t ya.”

“I’ve got my reasons. For keeping to myself.”

“Just not a people person, huh?”

“I like people. Some don’t like me. It’s better if they keep away. Especially from my family.”

Frank nods in understanding, then begins ringing up and bagging the purchases. “Gotta like a man that will defend and protect his own, no matter what.”

“You do what you gotta do,” Tyler reasons, reaching into the pocket of his hoodie when he feels his cellphone vibrate against him. Eyes narrowing and a frown playing on his lips when he reads the text sent by his wife; complaining about being woken up from a dead sleep by the ‘new nuisance in town’ repeatedly ringing the doorbell.

He was confident they’d seen and heard the last of Natalie. While he’d been grateful for her assistance in the American Girl store during Addie’s disappearance, he’d made it perfectly clear that he wanted nothing more to do with her. His already agitated and guilt stricken mood made even worse but yet another attempt on her part to proposition him; boldly stating in front of other customers and his children and granddaughter that while playing hard to get only made him sexier, it was time to put an end to the games. It was obvious -in her mind- that he was attracted to her and was only holding back out of a sense of loyalty and obligation to the woman who’d given him seven offspring.

The sex would be off the charts, Natalie had whispered in his ear, and brazenly attempted a crotch grab while waiting in line at the register. Not caring about the still sobbing Addie in his arms and tightly clinging to him, or the furious glares that Brookie was shooting in her direction. He hadn’t been kind in his rejection; angrily yanking her hand away with enough force to cause her to wince in pain and for his fingers to bruise the skin around her wrist. And he’d kept his tone low yet forceful when he’d told her to back off; he wouldn’t tolerate blatant disrespect towards his wife, especially in front of two of the children she’d not only hand in creating, but had carried inside of her.

“Bad news?” Frank inquires, and pushes the plastic bags across the counter.

“Something I’d rather NOT be dealing with.” He tucks his phone back into his pocket and checks the total on the register; pulling forty from his wallet and waving off the change when Frank begins to hand it over. “But it’s probably better in my hands that my wife’s.”

“Feisty little thing, ain’t she,” Frank chuckles. “I still remember when she told that one kid off for checking out your one girl. Your oldest. She was over there looking at the magazines, minding her own business, and some fucking high school joker was checking her out and making comments to his buddies. Your wife certainly isn’t afraid to mix things up, is she.”

“You don’t mess with a mumma bear. She’s tiny, but she’ll rip you apart,”

Frank grins, “Bet that makes you toe the line, huh?”

“I long ago learned what buttons NOT to push. She looks all cute and sweet and innocent, but trust me, that girl can fuck someone up. I’ll probably see you later.” He gathers up the bags in one hand, cup of coffee in the other. “TJ and Declan will want to come by. They also do when you get the new Archie comics.”

“Already put two aside from them. Gotta treat my best customers right. And speaking of that privacy you like so much…”

Tyler pauses in the doorway.

“You ain’t gonna like what I have to tell you.”

“Not when you put it like that I won’t.” He once more approaches the register. “What’s going on?”

“Someone’s been in here a few times asking about you. And your family. I meant to tell you yesterday, but you had the girls with you and I didn’t want to bring something up that might spook them or upset them.”

“Someone from the neighbourhood?”

“A newcomer. Some woman. Tall, blond, need a power washer to get all that crap off her face. Why do women do that? Why do they feel the need to smear on the war paint? Looking like damn clowns is what they look like. I don’t want to be stuck in the rain with a girl and turn around and look at her and find damn eyebrows washed away, know what I’m saying? Wake up next to them and all the makeup is gone and you no longer recognize them and you think some strange woman snuck into bed with ya in the middle of the night.”

“What did she want, Frank? What did she want to know?”

“Little questions, mostly. Mostly about you and your wife. How you met, what her name was before she met you, where she’s from originally, family life. That kind of thing. Wanted to know your last name but I told her I had no clue. First names only. That’s the way it’s always been.”

“Ask anything about my kids?”

“Just wanted to know their ages, school grades, stuff like that. I didn't have any info to give her and I told her that much. Also said even if I DID know, I wouldn’t cough it up to her or anyone else. Awful nosey, don’t you think? Trying to get up in a man’s business like that?”

“She’s definitely treading on thin ice. I appreciate it. That you wouldn’t tell her even if you did know that stuff.”

“Ain’t nobody's business what you do with your life. And it especially ain’t none of their concern when it comes to children. That’s just creepy as hell, if you ask me. Think she’s up to no good? Trying to cause trouble? With you and the missus?”

“I don’t know what she’s up to.” He moves towards the door. “I’ll find out though. One way or another. Thanks for letting me know. And for having our backs.”

“You and your family have been nothing but good to me, figure I should return the favour. Let me know how it turns out, would ya? Once you find out just what she’s up to. Inquiring minds want to know, and all.”

“I’ll let you know,” Tyler promises, and uses a forearm to push open the door.

“Hey!” Frank calls to him, and he pauses on the threshold. “What IS your last name?”

“Drummond.” The lie rolls easily off the tongue. Almost TOO easily.

“Tyler Drummond,” Frank nods as he considers it. “Got a nice ring to it. You know, you don’t look like a Tyler.”

“Yeah,” he grins, and steps out the door. “So I’ve been told.”

*****

He finds her in the kitchen. Back turned towards the doorway as she waits for the toaster to finish its cycle; repetitively tapping the end of a butter knife against the granite countertop as her body repeatedly shifts weight from one side to the other. Well known evidence of agitation and simmering anger; body always needing to be in motion, anxiety propelled nervous ‘tics’. She’s been fighting her own battle against mental illness for longer than he’s known her; the years of psychological torment inflicted by her mother -and eventually an emotionally, physically, and sexually abusive husband- leaving wounds far deeper and more punishing than anything his body has ever experienced. Medication and therapy have helped, as has finding her own ‘niche’ in the world beyond just being a wife and a mother; running her own business, a once weekly yoga and meditation class, her own strenuous workout plan that he’d helped her create. She’s always managed well considering; panic and anxiety attacks fairly uncommon and periods of deep and crippling depression far and few between.

While he always admonishes her for taking on too much and throwing herself into caring for others instead of herself, she swears that it helps; keeping her mind and her body occupied and not giving her a chance to sit still for too long and dwell on things. He’s sure there’s some PTSD in there. The incident on the Sultana Kamal Bridge still weighs heavily on her; unable to sit down and talk about it without having an emotional meltdown and suffering from the occasional night terror. But she always shrugs off the idea of additional help and supports; insisting she’s fine and just needs to keep busy and that things will pass. They always do. And even though she’s infamous for calling him the most stubborn human on the planet, he’s pretty sure that it’s HER that actually holds that title.

Per Tanner’s written instructions, he leaves the bodega purchases in their bags; carrying them into the pantry and placing them in a plastic tote box marked with his son’s name. The ten year old very particular and detail oriented; extremely neat and tidy and having his own anxiety attacks if anyone dares to upset his ebb and flow. For his seventh birthday, the only gifts he’d requested were a label maker and over two dozen food storage containers; adamant that those were the only things he wanted and didn’t care about the idea of a new bike or surfboard or the latest gaming system. Less than twenty four hours after receiving what he so desperately coveted, he’d used them to reorganize the pantry at home; everything stored in plastic containers and labelled appropriately and throwing a fit if anyone didn’t alphabetical order when putting things back on the shelves. THAT had prompted them to finally seek out a diagnosis for him. They had suspected it for years; Tanner sitting some place on the Autism spectrum. Yet it had still been hard to hear the words come out of the specialist’s mouth; fear and worry and concerns for his future flooding through them as they saw the words neatly printed out in their son’s medical chart.

“Everyone still asleep?” he inquires, as he finally approaches. Standing behind her with his hands on her hips; lips meeting the top of her head as his fingers gently knead the supple flesh. Even when -uncharacteristically- grumpy first thing in the morning, she is always at her most adorable; hair messy and face still puffy from sleep, petite frame clad in her infamous mismatched pyjamas. Today it’s a pair of scrubs with the word Columbia printed across the ass and a faded and tattered t-shirt from his side of the closet; miles too big on her yet somehow sexy at the same time.

“Thankfully. Takota woke up in a panic; the doorbell scared the ever loving shit out of him. You know how it is; things always seem a thousand times louder when you’re asleep. I cuddled with him for a bit; he’s passed out in the middle of our bed now.”

Draping an arm across her collarbone, he presses a kiss to her temple, then watches in amusement as she tends to the toasted bagel now sitting on the plate in front of her; putting enough force behind buttering it that the knife pierces the toast.

“You know…” his lips rest against the side of her head. “...you’re not supposed to stab the damn thing.”

“Better to stab this than walk down the street and stab that bitch in the fucking face,” she reasons. “I don’t think I’m in the position in my life where it would be a good idea to go to prison.”

“Definitely wouldn’t be ideal at this point and time. Not to mention you always complain about how shitty you look in orange. So how about we NOT stab anyone and try to rein in our homicidal tendencies?” Reaching around her, he wrenches the knife out of her shockingly tight and strong grip; completing the preparation of the bagel for her.

She tips her head back to look at him, smiling in appreciation. “I’m mad.”

“I can see that.”

“What is that woman’s major malfunction? Why is she so goddamn insistent on seeing you? I mean, I know you’re hot and the walking and breathing definition of masculinity and you’re enough to make even the old ladies all weak in the knees, but fuck…” she turns around to face him; plate in her hand as she leans back against the counter. “...she is WAY worse than any thirsty females on the playground or at the soccer park.”

“She’s something else alright.” He moves to the kettle boiling on the stove; snagging a clean mug from the drainboard by the sink and a tea bag from a canister on the counter.

“To show up here at all is a dumb ass thing to do. But at seven in the morning? Knowing there’s a house full of littles here? She has a kid of her own. I doubt she’d like if someone popped up on her doorstep and woke her crotch fruit up.”

“I don’t think she gives a shit, Me. About our kids OR her own.”

“She treats that kid like a goddamn accessory. Have you seen the way she dresses that little girl? Fur coats and Gucci and Chanel, a freaking bracelet and earrings from Tiffany’s. The kid even carries a bloody Birkin bag! She’s six! What the hell kind of parent buys stuff like that for ANY kid? Never mind a six year old.”

“A person with money to burn apparently.”

“WE have money to burn. And then some. Our kids wear clothes from Target. The occasional UnderArmour or Nike swag here or there. Most expensive thing on them is their shoes. And not even THOSE are over a hundred bucks.”

“Millie does have that expensive purse,” he points out, as he stands in front of the open fridge door and snags a carton of milk; dumping the preferred and required amount into the steaming mug of tea. “The pink one.”

“The Chanel. Yes, she does have that. And you know why she does? Because when Millie says ‘daddy, I really like that’, daddy goes ahead and buys it for her and doesn’t even bother to check the make or the price tag. That is SOLELY on you.”

“Daddy likes to spoil his girls,” he reasons, offering the mug as he rejoins her. “Especially the oldest one.”

“Millie always HAS been your favourite.”

“I meant YOU,” he presses a chaste peck to her lips when she turns her face up towards him. “Not Millie. I spoil you way more than I spoil any of those kids.”

“And how many times have you been told NOT to?”

“Way too many to count. How many times have I told you that I don’t give a shit what you say and that I’m going to keep on doing it?”

Smirking, she rips a piece of bagel off with her teeth. “Touche.”

“What did she want?” He stands next to her, palms resting on the edge of the counter. “The nuisance?”

“To be just that. A nuisance. I kept telling her you weren’t home. That you’d gone out for a bit. She wasn’t having any of it. Insisted that I was lying and accused me of being jealous and possessive and told me that no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t keep you away from her. Something about 'you can’t stop what the heart AND the body want'.”

He gives a derisive snort.

“I don’t know. By that point I had already tuned out and was fantasizing about how I was going to kill her and dispose of her body. What the hell is her issue? I get that she has a raging female boner for you and in all fairness, I don’t blame her. But that woman is coo-coo for Cocoa Puffs. And I don’t use that term lightly. I save that for the REALLY crazy ones.”

“Did she say what she wanted? Why she even came over here?”

“You mean other than to jump on your dick? Or to convince me that you and her have some undeniable sexual chemistry and that you’re reluctant to leave me because I’m clingy and needy and have trapped you with half a dozen kids? Plus one.”

“She said that?”

“Every last word. Apparently you and her have really hit it off. There’s some kind of powerful and potent sexual and emotional connection between the two of you. News to me.”

“She’s fucking delusional. You realize that, yeah?”

“Big time delusional. I know what you’re like. I know how much you love me and your kids; how you’re unwaveringly faithful and loyal. I’ve never doubted any of that. I’ve never had a reason to. If you wanted out, you would have left a long time ago. You’ve had your chances.”

“I don’t want out. I’m all in. I’ve been all in for twelve and half years. I’m all in for the rest of my life. So sorry, Me. You’re stuck with me. Until the bitter end.”

“I can think of worse fates. But what the hell is her problem? Who does shit like this? Calling on another woman’s husband? Making up bullshit like that? Trying to cause problems between people?”

“A crazy person, that’s who. That’s all she wanted? To see me?”

“To give you Addie’s mitts back. I guess she left them at the American Girl store and crazy lady picked them up. Couldn’t she just leave them in the mailbox instead of showing up and ringing the doorbell at seven in the morning? Is that NOT what a normal person would do?”

“I think we’ve already established that she’s NOT normal.”

“You didn’t tell me she was there yesterday,” Esme sips at her tea. “At the American Girl place.”

“I thought I did.”

“That’s my sworn enemy. I would definitely remember if you told me something like that.”

Tyler shrugs. “Guess it just slipped my mind with everything else that was going. With Addie flipping out and me feeling like shit for losing it on her, telling you about the neighbour wasn’t the first thing on my agenda. I probably should have, but…”

“So she just happened to be there? At the American Girl lunch?”

“Yup. Showed up with her kid.”

“Kind of a coincidence, don’t you think? That she’d be there on the EXACT same day? I don’t mean to go all paranoid and possessive and jealous wife, but…”

“You’re not paranoid. And aren’t we all a little possessive? And jealous? When we love someone? I’m that way with you. I don’t like guys checking you out and making comments towards you and all that. And if that makes me possessive and jealous…” shrugging, he reaches for her tea and takes a sip.

“This woman has serious issues, Tyler. She’s nuts. Certifiably, I think. Didn’t you already tell her to leave you alone? That you’re married? Happily?”

“More than once.”

“Does she not realize some men actually DO value the sanctity of marriage? Mind you, it doesn’t seem like many these days, but still.”

“I don’t think that’s the kind of married men she’s used to, Me. I don’t think I fit HER definition of a married man. And it’s not for the lack of trying to scare her off. I’ve tried. Several times. Doesn’t seem to be getting through.”

“She’s persistent, I’ll give her that. Still, I don’t like someone pissing in my front yard. Continuously. Seems awful weird; her somehow showing up nearly everywhere you go. I can see the park being a one off; she was new to the community, saw a parent there and took it upon herself to try and make friends. But everything else? When you took the kids for lunch, when you and I were on our date; we SAW her watching us from her living room window. She didn’t hide it.”

“That was a little...odd,” Tyler admits.

“And how many times has she suddenly popped into the bodega when you’ve been there with the boys?”

“I’d say nine times out of ten.”

“That’s way too much of a coincidence to be a coincidence, don’t you think?”

“I do think that. I also think we need to talk about it. About all of this.”

“Oh God…” she grimaces. “...you ARE leaving me for her.”

“What?” He can’t help but laugh. “No, baby. NO. I am definitely NOT leaving you for her. For ANYONE. I already told you; I’m in this right to the end. Whenever that may be. There’s no one else, Me.” Draping an arm across her shoulders, he pulls her into him; lips meeting her temple and lingering for several seconds. “There’s just you. There’s always just been just you. Always will be.”

“And we need to talk about her because…”

“Because there’s more going on than you realize. More than just her showing up places.”

Esme frowns, mug poised at her lips. “Uh oh. I don’t think I like the sound of that.”

“Believe me, I don’t like it either. What’s going. But you’re right; that woman definitely DOES have issues.”

“Other than being a stalker you mean?”

“I don’t know EXACTLY what’s going on. Or how serious it is. But I don’t like it. What she’s up to.”

“And coming from someone with your instincts and your background? That’s saying something. Do I need to worry about it? Is it something we need to really watch out for and take seriously and…?”

"I honestly don't know, babe. But she knows stuff. About us. She somehow knows our name. Called me by first AND last yesterday. I've never told her what it is. And I highly doubt you did."

“I want to stab the woman in the face with a butter knife, so I think it's safe to say I’m NOT going to be out there telling her personal things. How WOULD she find that out? It’s not like it’s advertised anywhere. Frank doesn’t know it, Desi wouldn’t say anything.”

“She tried to blame TJ. Said she talked to him when he was out shovelling snow and that he coughed up the info. I confronted him and he denied it. Said that she DID stop to talk to him and all he told her was his first name. That’s it. Told me he knows better than that; not to tell strangers much about us.”

“TJ doesn’t lie. Not since he got caught...on camera...denting your truck and trying to tell me that it wasn’t him. He learned his lesson, believe me. And out of all the kids who would be a blabber mouth? He’s the last one. He idolizes you. The last thing he wants to do is piss you off or disappoint you. So when you tell him what to do or what NOT to do, he listens.”

“So how did she know? If neither of us told her and Desi didn’t say anything and we know it’s not TJ…”

“I don’t know. She hasn’t been around any of the other kids. They’d all say something. They’d tell us if she was asking questions.”

“She had to find out from somewhere. Someone had to tell her. It’s not like that info is just out there for anyone to look up. You don’t even use a real last name on the internet. We’ve been careful. We locked everything down five years ago. Made sure people couldn’t find shit out. But somehow…”

Sighing heavily, she carries her empty mug and dirty plate to the sink, then rejoins him; standing between his legs with her hands on his hips. “Do you think it's something serious? Something we need to worry about?”

“Are you asking me if I think she’s a threat?”

Esme nods.

“I don’t get that feeling from her. I don’t think she’s the type that gets her hands dirty. More the type that aids the person that does.”

“That sounds familiar. I distinctly remember someone else who used to do exactly that.”

“Let’s not compare the two of you. You’re nothing alike.”

“I used to help people get their hands dirty. I used to ask all the questions and find out all the info and then pass it along to guys like you. Sounds like she might be into the same kind of thing. Have you looked into her? Find out anything about her?”

“Not much to find out. Couple things here and there but nothing serious. I know she used to be in a relationship with the District Attorney in Chicago. There was a write up about it; the two of them at some charity event a few years back.”

“Is he the ex husband?”

“If he is…” he tucks her hair behind her ears, then cradles her face in his palms; thumbs repeatedly brushing against her cheeks. “...she’s never gone by his last name. I checked into that, too.”

“Maybe try Nik. She’s got a real knack of finding things about people. Things they’ve long kept buried. I’m sure she’d look into it. Probably have better luck than you.”

“If it comes to that, I’ll go in that direction. But I was thinking…”

She smirks. “I don’t think I like the way you said that...”

“...that if you still had any of your old contacts….”

“My old contacts? I haven’t spoken to any of them in years. Not since the whole fuck up with Nathan and the fake papers from the Marines. I haven’t talked to any of those people since.”

“What about people in the game? That you worked for BEFORE Nik? You ever talk to any of them?”

“There’s a couple I interact once in a while but mostly about non job related stuff. Just random checking in on each other and seeing how our lives are going. You’re not serious about this, are you? About wanting ME to try and find things out? I haven’t had a finger on that particular pulse in a long time.”

“The circle’s pretty tight,” Tyler reasons. “Once you’re in it, you’re never really out of it. There’s guys I haven’t talked to in years but I know I could call if I needed a favour. Maybe you’ve got a couple of those too. People that would do you a solid if you needed them to.”

“I thought we agreed that I’d put that part of my life behind me? We talked about this. After I royally messed things up by not realizing those papers sent to me were fake. I mean, it’s practically my fault that Nathan managed to get a hold of you in the first place.”

“Okay, we’re NOT going to go there. Because none of that is true. It happened. There’s no one to blame. He knew he couldn’t take me in a fair fight. Knew he had to get me from behind. Take me down.”

“And he wouldn’t have been able to had I NOT called you. Had I realized those papers weren’t the real deal, you never would have gone there and confronted him. We would have waited for the legit documents and you would have known how unstable he was. Instead, I just sent you in there and…”

“Let’s get one thing straight. You didn’t do anything. I went in there on my own. It was my choice. I had the chance; to walk away and leave him there. And I didn’t. I went back in. You had nothing to do with it.”

“If I’d known about the papers…”

“YOU had nothing to do with it,” he repeats. “There was no way you could have known what we were dealing with. Same way I couldn’t have known. It happened. Nathan did what he did.”

“Yeah, and you almost died. Because I was careless and…”

“Stop,” he presses a kiss to her lips in order to silence. “We are NOT going to talk about him. Nothing good ever comes out of talking about that asshole. So can we not? Bring him up? Can we let this go?”

“I just…”

“Drop it,” he orders, and then pecks the tip of her nose. “Please.”

“All I’m saying is…”

“Oh my god, woman. Stop.” Placing a kiss to her forehead, he gathers her into his arms; pulling her tightly into him, hands locking together at the small of her back. “We’re not going to talk about this. Five years ago. It never leads to anything good. And I really do not feel like fighting with you. Not after the night we had last night.”

Smiling, she wraps both arms around his waist. “It was a good night.”

“A very good night.” He drops a kiss on the top of her head. “You were fucking incredible.”

“I was, was I?” She looks up at him, bottom of her chin resting on his chest. “You weren’t too shabby either. You know how to raise the bar impossibly high, I’ll tell you that much. And that whole thing in the tub? We need to do that again. ASAP.”

“Thought you didn’t enjoy it. You were practically having a temper tantrum.”

“I was frustrated. Do you know that aggravating it is? Getting that close and having someone just yank the carpet out from under you? Do you have any idea how maddening that is?”

“Actually, I do. You’ve done it to me. Many times. But if you want to do it again…”

“I do. There’s a lot of things I want to do again. And again. And again. With you.”

“Baby, I aim to please.”

“And you do. Very well, as a matter of fact. Even though I am still slightly embarrassed by my reaction. You know, when I…in the tub...when you…”

“When I made you squirt?” He chuckles when she gives an embarrassed groan and buries her face in his shirt. “Why does that make you all shy and shit? I’m the last person you should be embarrassed around. We’ve been doing some dirty shit since day one. You think you would have stopped getting embarrassed a long time ago. I’ve only been your husband for twelve and a half years.”

“It’s just so...I don’t know...gross.”

“Gross? It’s fucking hot. It’s a turn on. Knowing I can make you do THAT? It doesn’t happen often; you getting THAT worked up.”

“Well I guess you need to try harder,” she teases, and gives a yelp when he brings both palms down onto her ass in ringing slaps and then squeezes tightly. “I have to say, husband. You really are a man among men. I definitely hit the jackpot when I landed you. Smartest thing I ever did; letting you put a ring on it.”

“Even though you didn’t want to marry me at first?”

“For the record…” her hands move to his sides, softly and repeatedly moving over his ribs. “...I never said I didn’t want to marry you. I said I was scared to get married again. That I was worried we were going to fuck things up. And I loved you and I didn’t want us to fuck them up. We both had pretty bad track records when it came to marriage.”

“That’s because we both married the wrong people the first time around.”

“I was just scared. I didn’t want things to go bad between us. Not when they already seemed so good. And if that meant staying the happily unmarried couple…”

“But I wasn’t okay with that. I wanted to get married. To you. And before you ask? No. Not because you were having Millie. She had nothing to do with it. I would have wanted to marry you even if there hadn’t been a baby. But I’m glad there was. She’s pretty awesome. They all are.”

“Yeah,” she smiles up at him. “They are. We’ve done good work, Tae. We definitely make some pretty damn beautiful babies. And it’s kind of sad; that there won’t be anymore. Kind of bittersweet. But I think it’s time for us, don’t you? Time for you and I to concentrate on each other for a change. I don’t want that to be all there is to us. Two people raising kids together.”

“There’s way too much between us for it to ever be just that,” he assures her. Laying a hand on the small of her back, he once more pulls her tightly into him; fingers of his other hand biting into the cheek of her ass when he covers her mouth with his.

The kiss is long and soft and slow; her arms wrapping around his waist as she stands on the top of his feet in order to give her that little bit of extra height. Her lips moving against his in perfect unison; moulding and fitting together in ways he’d never experienced with anyone else before. Bodies so in sync with each other; always so responsive and eager.

“I have another favour to ask,” he says when he pulls away, hands settling on her hips.

“You keep kissing me like that?” Her eyes are still closed as she sighs heavily and dreamily. “ For the rest of my life? You can ask as many favours as you want.”

“I don’t want you causing issues with Riley. Over the fentanyl.”

Her eyes snap open; a frown curving her lips as she looks up at him.

“She didn’t give it to me with bad intentions. It wasn’t like she was hooking me up with a fix. That’s not what I wanted it for. It had nothing to do with being an addict and everything to do with the pain I was in. I had screwed that knee up and it was going to be months before they could do another reconstruction and I couldn’t take much more. That’s how bad it was. How bad I was suffering. And I knew the doctor wouldn’t give me anything else. That he’d think I was just drug seeking; in it to get a high.”

“So you asked her.”

“I couldn’t ask Ovi. I knew he’d tell you. And I didn’t want him getting caught and his whole career going down the toilet before it even started. So when Riley came up here that summer, I asked her for something stronger. To hook me up with something that could help. And she put up a good fight; she wasn’t going to go give in. I’m the one who convinced her to. Promised I’d only use it when necessary.”

“And did you? Use it just when necessary?”

“Only when the pain got to be too much. She gave me enough pills to last a couple months. I only took eight. In the two weeks we were here. That’s it. When we were ready to go back home, I put them in the medicine cabinet and never thought about them again.”

“Until the other night.”

Tyler nods. “It scared the fuck out of me, Esme. How easy it was to take to them. To remember they were even there. I didn’t even give it a second thought. I just grabbed them and took them. No hesitation.”

“You realize how badly that could have gone, right? You don’t play around with that stuff, Tyler. That is some heavy duty shit and you just went ahead and took six of them and…”

“Not one of my finer moments.”

“It could have killed you. That many. You know that, right? It could have killed you. Did you even stop to think about that? About what would happen? How I’d find you dead? On Christmas morning? Did that even occur to you?”

“No,” he admits. “And that’s what scared me. The fact I didn’t think of any of that. That I just took the stuff. Like I’d done it a million times before.”

“Did you WANT something bad to happen?”

“No, babe. I didn’t. I just needed to shut my brain up. I just needed to get away from it. I needed peace and fucking quiet. An escape. From what goes on in my head.”

“I’m going to ask you something and I want you to be one hundred percent honest with me. No matter how hard it will be for me to hear or how bad you think it will hurt me. I need you to tell me the truth. Can you do that? Be honest with me?”

“I can.”

“Do you want to die? Right now. Right this second. Is that what your brain is telling you? Is that what it’s BEEN telling you? That it would be better if you weren’t here? That my life and the kids’ lives would somehow be better if you weren’t around anymore? Has it been telling you that?”

“How did we get onto this? I was just asking you not to go off on Riley. That she was only trying to help and…”

“Please don’t do that. Deflect. I’m scared too. It frightens me that you found it so easy to take those pills. That you didn’t even stop to think of what could happen. How it could have killed you and what that would have done to me. And the kids. That isn’t like you; you weigh options and you analyze every scenario and you consider every possible consequence. So I need to know. Did you take those pills because your brain is telling you that you’re better off dead?”

“Esme…”

“Tyler…” her voice cracks with emotion and she valiantly fights back against a flood of threatening tears. “...I need you to tell me the truth. I need to know exactly what we’re dealing with here. I need to know just how serious this is. I need you to tell me what’s REALLY going on in your head. So we can get past this and figure shit out and work on how to help you.

“I don’t…”

“I know you’re just trying to protect me. And believe me, I love you so much for that. The fact you’ve always protected me. No matter what. But right now I need to know the truth. Or we won’t get past this. Do you want to die?”

He swallows heavily. “Sometimes.”

“When was the last time you thought of it? When you felt that way?”

“Couple days ago.”

She briefly looks away in an attempt to control her emotions. “That night you took the fentanyl? Did you want to die then?”

He nods.

“Jesus….” she rakes a hand through her hair, then places it over her mouth; tears managing to escape. “...I mean, I was pretty sure you were going to say yes. We’ve been in this place before. I’ve taken a loaded gun out of your hand, for crying out loud. But to actually hear it…”

“I’m sorry, Me. I’m sorry that my brain is the way it is. I am so fucking sorry.”

“I know you can’t help it. I know it’s an illness and I know first hand how bad it can get. But I just…” she takes a deep, quivering breath and slowly releases it. “....I need to go and get some air or something. I need to just get out and get my shit together. I need…”

“Baby….” he attempts to move his hands to her shoulders, but is foiled when she takes a step backwards.

“I need to get out of here. Just for an hour. Just to clear my head and accept this and figure out a way to deal with it. It’s not you, Tyler. You realize that, right? Please tell me you realize that.”

“I do. I do realize that.”

“I just don’t know how much more I can take,” she admits. “I am so close to breaking and if that happens, I won’t be of any use to you. Or the kids. I just need some fresh air and a chance to get myself together and come to terms with this. With just how bad it actually is. Can you give me that? Just that little bit of time?”

“Of course I can.”

“It’s not you,” she repeats, and moves closer to him. Once more perching herself on top of his feet; both arms reaching up to circle his neck. “I need you to know it’s not you.”

“I know that, Me.” He cradles her face in his palms; fingers gently brushing away the tears that glisten on her face. “Just tell me you’re coming back. That you’re not just going to walk out of here and leave me and our kids. Tell me…”

“I’m not leaving you. Or them. I just need some time. An hour, even. Just to get my shit together. Just to sort through all of this stuff in my head. I’m not going anywhere, Tyler. I’m not walking away from you. From our family. From US. That isn’t even an option.”

“I’m just worried you’re going to walk out and realize it’s just too much. That I’M too much.”

“That’s not going to happen,” she assures him. “I love you. My whole world begins and ends with you. I need to be able to help you. And right now? I don’t think I can. I feel like I'm drowning. Or like I’m walking on really thin ice and one bad step is just going to pull me under. And I need to be okay. I need to be strong. For you.”

“I need you to be strong for YOURSELF. Why haven’t you told me any of this? About how you’re feeling? Being this close to the edge? Why…?”

“Not right now, okay? I’m going to go and get dressed and get some air. And when I come back, we’ll talk. We’ll get TJ and Millie and Alannah to watch everyone and we’ll sit down and talk. Get it all out in the open. BEFORE Riley gets here. I’m coming home, you know. It’s not like I’m disappearing off the face of the earth. I WILL be back.”

“And I’ll be here. No matter long how it takes.”

“An hour,” she promises, and turns her face up to his when he leans down to kiss her. “I didn’t lose you to Dhaka,” she says, and places her hands over his; eyes closing as his lips press against her forehead. “And I sure as hell won’t lose you to your own mind.”

[littlelittlebear]

Two Drifters | 3/3 Jeronica Secret Santa

@fangstomysweetpea oh my god.... its finally time!!! 

The moment i’ve been aching for is finally here and i am HYPE

Happy Christmas my dear Tumblr-friend, I hope you enjoy this jeronica playlist/au/riverdale rewrite.

A couple things first, the descriptions on each song are just an outline as to whats happening in that moment/what the song calls for. Also, this is like a story, so its not really something you can play on shuffle lol. I’m confident you didn’t really need these “instructions” lmao, just want you to have a bomb-ass jeronica experience XDD

Also, you don’t have to “follow” the descriptions when you think them out, you can completely take the reigns too if you’d like!

So.... here ya go!!

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1MflcKtyBDRjnP0giX03X4?si=ZcsD0GfxR0KevhgDpTZVKQ

And here are the descriptions-

Oxford Comma-

Locking eyes for the first time… wow. Just- everything is in slow motion.

Baby Doll-

Slow dancing in Pop’s after the dance. (V goes to Pop’s instead of Archie)

Can I call you tonight?-

Jughead and Veronica’s moments of glee when they finally set up a date with each other. Veronica squeals and jumps up and down, Jughead punches the air, they both fall down on the bed with blissful looks on their faces. Two cinnamon rolls.

“So, I’ll call you tonight?”

“Yes! *Too enthusiastic- calm down Veronica* Yes. Call me tonight.”

*Que music*

Just Like a Movie-

Jughead calls this their theme song one day when they’re just hanging out in the student lounge as a joke.

Scrawny-

Veronica calls this Jughead’s theme song in response, they have a good laugh and Jughead rolls his eyes at the lyrics A LOT.

Space Girl-

Jughead calls this Veronica’s theme song- because she’s “oUt oF tHiS worLD!”.

She smacks his arm for being so cheesy.

Good Morning-

The morning after they do the “horizontal tango” with each other for the first time, they dance in Veronica’s kitchen, knowing all the words- only to be interrupted by an amused Hermione Lodge.

Unforgettable-

Their first Christmas together, spent snowed in at The Pembrooke. But honestly, they don’t mind.

Shake it out-

Jughead and Veronica cry together after her parents blackmail them/force them to break up. #parentssuck.

Your star-

Coping with the breakup, newsflash- they aren’t, or when they are... they don’t go the healthiest route. So. Much. Angst.

Rare-

Veronica changes up her style a little bit, which really is just lower cut tops, just trying to forget about Jughead- does a lil sexy performance singing to this at a pep rally.

Out the door-

Jughead never leaving the depressional stage of grief.                                

+ Exchanging broken looks that just scream “I’m not over you.”

I can’t get you off my mind-

Drunkenly hooking up at a party because their tension recently had just been… w o w

Drugs-

Sneaking around- sexy times ;)

Why Do You Love Me-

Having a screaming match, then a very angry/hot makeup session, then very angry sex XD

The Wind-

After some hOrIzOnTaL TaNGo at Sweetwater River, they admit that they can’t keep away from each other, saying that they love each other for the first time- followed by Veronica crying tears of joy cuz she’s never done that before- and that they’re going to work everything out, together. They just hold each other after that.

“I love you, Princess.”

Veronica props herself on her elbow to face him (they were laying down before)

Jughead sees her widened eyes. “Y-you don’t have to say it back, I know its ha-“

“I love you too, Jug”

You and I-

Montage of working at Pop’s for summer, ending with a jam sesh in Jughead’s trailer- Veronica just in his shirt and Jughead just in his sweats. FP comes in, surprised to see Veronica, but welcomes her easily. FP and Veronica bond, and he embarrasses Jug with some baby photos. While Jug’s probably beet-red, he can’t help but completely oggle at Veronica- happy that they don’t have to hide from his dad anymore.

Start a Riot-

Jeronica send a little message to Hiram through security cameras (they just make out lmao), showing that he can’t keep them apart. They then proceed to trash Hiram’s jingle jangle lab. :)

Moon River-

Slow dancing after having been crowned homecoming King and Queen. And of course, because Veronica is 1/2 of this relationship- this becomes their song.

“That’s us.”

“What do you mean?” Veronica asks, confused.

“The two drifters in the song. ‘Two drifters, off to see the world.’ That’s us”

Veronica’s eyes start to gloss.

“I absolutely love that. And you.”

Teenagers-

Being the badass power couple they are, being 100% team Serpent against the Bulldogs during the riots. Its all one long shot too- no cuts :))

A Sunday Kind of Love-

Looking at each other in slow motion (wow- I really love putting stuff in slow motion) when Veronica is officially named Serpent queen, they’re absolutely smitten with each other. Cut to them dancing in the Wyrm to the song, discussing how they’re going to make their big debut as Riverdale’s resident power couple… second to Choni of course.

“So… now that I’m your queen, I was thinking had a debut of sorts. Just to educate the public of this new order.” Veronica jabs, only kind of joking.

Jughead laughs, but it sounds more of a huff.

“Could you settle for a hand-in-hand entrance at school? Or would you be more comfortable with a red carpet event?”

Glory-

Veronica and Jughead walking into school as Serpent Royalty with matching Serpent jackets- no special colours thank you very much. You can bet your ass its in slow motion.

Worlds Apart-

Veronica crying at Jughead’s bed-side after the Ghoulies fuck him up.

Boss Bitch-

Veronica gets revenge on the Ghoulies and Penny Peabody with the help of the female Serpents, the River vixens, Hermione, Betty, and Alice.

Le Symbolique-

Veronica and Jughead reunite from his state of unconsciousness, this whole sequence is in slow motion, with a lot of white lighting/glare. Jughead almost died and just that thought alone KILLED Veronica.

“Jug I was so scared-“

“Shush Ronnie, let me look at you.” His teary eyes trace over Veronica’s face with a beaming smile, before he brings his girlfriend closer and kisses the top of her forehead.

Harmony Hall- 

Some core four bliss before it gets chaotic again, with a side of Jeronica and Barchie cuddles.

Not Your Barbie Girl-

A River vixen performance, Jughead is so fricken in love with Ronnie right now cuz she’s just RADIATING empowerment.

Therefore I Am- 

Jeronica sends Hiram to jail again after a bomb ass one liner from Veronica:

“Mija, you have no idea what you’re doing.”

“Only one thing’s false in that sentence Hiram, I’m not your Mija anymore.”

(HELP ME I CAN’T WRITE)

*Proud Jughead smirk*

This Life-

Veronica meeting JB and Gladys, them getting along great- just a wholesome Lodge/Jones get-together.

Don’t Call Me Angel-

Veronica changes her name to Luna, fully emancipating herself from Hiram, and this gets Jughead really turned on XD

Sway With Me-

La Bonne Nuit’s first successful night, Josie, Veronica, Toni, and Cheryl perform. Veronica somehow convinces Jughead to dance with her in public. Think Moulin Rouge’s Diamond Dogs type editing.

My Oh My- 

Getting screwed over my Hiram, Veronica is in a TON of debt and needs some “stress relief” with Jughead. He obliges. Happily.

HIP-

Veronica and Cheryl start their rum business, Jughead helps and oml he’s so proud of her. Btw, Cheronica are HUGE badasses right now.

Bury a friend-

Surviving Eversgreen Forest and Penelope Blossom…

Youth-

The core four are free from the forest, successfully escaping Penelope Blossom. Jughead and Veronica share a tearful but happy kiss, laying down on the back of a truck.

Don’t Take The Money-

The core four hang out at pops and promise to have fun this senior year, Jughead steals Veronica’s cherry from her milkshake, but being so vulnerable to Midget’s (He calls her Midget. Yup.) puppy dog eyes, he makes it up to her by sharing his fries. 

“And for a brief, shining moment, we were kids again.” all that good shiz

The Four Seasons: “Winter”-

Jeronica hangs with the Stonewall psychos.

(Online Love)-

Veronica and Jughead FaceTime and Veronica has this vibe like she’s the montage of the hero’s dead girlfriend in a movie. Like her hair is all splayed out on her pillow and she’s all smiley-

“You look like an angel right now- with your hair like a halo and how much you’re smiling.”

Veronica laughs

“Well it’s your fault I’m smiling you idiot.” Her voice softens towards the end of the sentence.

“I love you too, Ron.”

El Tejano-

Party at Stonewall, Jeronica are absolutely WASTED. Fun fact- Jughead get’s really into PDA when he’s drunk

Burned Out- 

Oh shit… I guess Jughead is dead now. (dw, Betty’s still the one who “kills him”)

Claire de Lune-

Just kidding, he’s alive, and he and Veronica have a really cute moment in the bunker. Veronica starts reading his novel, per his request, and he just starts playing this on the record player and she smiles but her eyes are still on the book. He just kind of watches her, and when she starts beaming at the book he can’t help but kiss her right there. Then they just cuddle and little bit, Veronica on Jug’s lap, reading the book some more.

Girls Like GIrls-

Veronica has to prove Jughead is dead, so she and Betty kinda sorta… make out. Like, a lot. Betty is dating Archie at this point, and he’s the one who gets “mad”. But basically Betty and Veronica end up making out again cuz they spot Donna watching them. Veronica is a bi con, and Betty might be too but everyones in denial so *shrugs*.

Dream Lover-

(Time skip, because I’m lazy) Jughead’s alive again, sadly, his spot at NYU was taken by well, Veronica. Luckily, after pulling some strings, she surprises Jug with a full-ride acceptance letter from NYU starting second semester.

Magic Moments-

Yay! Prom! Barchie gets crowned king and queen (Beronica was kind of forgotten about, but thats fine, because we’re here for Jeronica first). While Betty and Archie are totally lost in each other, Jughead and Veronica are just kind of joking around on the side. While it’s Barchie’s moment, Jeronica is still looking pretty damn cute rn. Also, this becomes Barchie’s song!!

Oxford comma-

The song comes through the speaker at prom, Jughead invites Veronica to dance. As they sway, they gaze at one another like they’re seeing one another for the first time, to the song that started it all. 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

And thats it! Thats Jeronica’s story from season one to season four, I hope you have a very merry Christmas and I hope you liked your presents! Also, if anyone feels like adding on to the dialogue or using any of the points in a fic or even making a whole ass fanfiction- please do!! I didn’t do this justice with my mediocre quotes so it would actually be preferred XD.

And again, happy Christmas :))

[go-ldy]

I have zero self-control, so, if you're up to it: best and worst episode(s) of Riverdale?

I love this question! Sorry for the delay in answering, I have had to give this the deep thought and contemplation it deserves! Best episodes is easier for me tbh because there are only maybe one or two episodes of Riverdale that I did not like. I’ve decided to break it down into my best/worst for each season.

I’ve tried to approach this being as objective as possible but.... you know, I am only human, and I am easily swayed when Betty and Jughead make out a lot. 

Season 1

Best

1x10 or 1x11 with 1x11 having a slight edge. Obviously, the bughead angst content in both is A++ and what I am here for, but I also think that 1x11 in particular does a good job of moving the plot along while developing the characters at the same time (Riverdale is not always good at this ok so it is important to remark on it when it meets this bar!). We have Homecoming, and the incredibly awkward Cooper-Jones pre-Homecoming dinner, and Varchie sneaking into FP’s trailer behind Betty and Jughead’s back, and Veronica desperately trying to determine if her father had a role to play in Jason’s murder, and FP’s arrest (!!!) and Jughead running off at the end in a funk. There is a lot that happens AND everyone goes to a dance! It is sadly rare to have a Riverdale episode where everyone feels intertwined to the main story and where the Core 4 get to interact and develop. Plus, Jughead is so adorably excited about his and Betty’s family meeting even though they are 16 and have been dating for like two months. MY HEART. He was already planning their wedding.

Worst

1x09. It is the only episode of season 1 that felt filler. And I would still rank it higher than the other “worst” episodes on this list. But the main plot of Archie being used by the Blossom family is ehhhhhh. And frankly uncomfortable given his all too real recent past of being used by Ms. Grundy with no acknowledgment from the show whatsoever that these gross adults keep using this 16 year-old kid to serve their own purposes. So yeah, probably the worst of season 1.

Season 2

Best

I have to go with 2x14. Okay, okay 2x05/2x06 are probably better written and better plotted and have less dialogue that makes me want to end myself, but hear me out. 2x14 is the absolute essence of Riverdale packed into 40 glorious minutes:

Each couple has a spat with each other and then against each other, we get Betty versus Jughead, Archie versus Veronica, Bughead versus Varchie, and it is great???? yeah, you all fight over Hiram’s nefarious plot to buy up all the newspapers in town. 

Bughead listens to Varchie have sex and the vice-versa like an hour later as normal friends do.

Betty and Veronica talk about abuelita (I must know more about abuelita!).

An entire scene where Archie wakes up early to chop wood?? At someone else’s house? Even though he’s only there for a weekend?? Again, very normal, every day teenage behaviour. And Veronica pervs on him while sipping coffee. Get it, V.

Some of the worst, cringiest dialogue this show has ever had, and that is a HIGH BAR including: “A Vughead Kiss? Right now, in the present, might be precisely what it takes to save a future Bughead from imploding.” THIS IS THE WORST LINE OF DIALOGUE EVER WRITTEN, LIKE OF ALL TIME, I CAN BARELY WATCH. IT IS NAILS ON A CHALKBOARD, END ME.

Archie doing push ups in his bedroom, because OF COURSE ARCHIE RANDOMLY DOES PUSHUPS BEFORE BED AND ALSO WHEN UPSET HAVE YOU SEEN HIM. And then Veronica propositions him for sex and Archie, still mad about Vughead, turns her down. And this is an actual scene that takes up time in a 40 minutes episode??? I love it.

Lodge Lodge

They play monopoly

And then get attacked by home invaders!!!

Who Archie chases into the woods only for one of them to be killed by Andre so that Hiram can later frame Archie for a murder he didn’t commit.

anyway 2x14 is the best episode of Riverdale maybe ever, tell your friends.

Worst

2x11 for the reasons @arsenicpanda has articulated before - mostly involving the clumsy way that the writers tried to parallel the Serpents to the plight of Native Americans. And Jughead’s awkward white saviour plotline, eugh. Although bonus points for Archie trying to wrestle to impress Hiram for some reason?? I can’t hate it.

Season 3

Best

Season 3 has a lot of contenders. I’m torn between the parentale breakfast club episode (which also featured crazy-G&G-Jughead, a fave of mine) and the Prom episode, but I’m going to go with 3x20, Prom Night because this episode is a sheer delight from start to finish. Hal Cooper fakes his own death by cutting off his hand and then he replaces it with a hook - legends only. CHONI FOR PROM QUEENS until the dream is killed by Edgar. U KNOW that is when Cheryl started reconsidering the whole Farm business even with the whole being able to talk to Jason’s corpse thing. 

Bughead investigate shit and make great faces. Varchie go to prom as the least platonic “friends” ever and it is adorable. Everybody somehow wears the best outfits even though Bughead changed the Prom theme the night before. Betty being chased through the school by the Black Hood/her dad is legitimately terrifying. 10/10.

Worst

3x09, hands down. I have a lot of beef with this episode. My main beef is that 3x08 ends on this great cliffhanger and there is zero payoff? Jughead and FP come home to find the town is under QUARANTINE, no one is allowed IN OR OUT, and then in 3x09, he is snuggling in bed with Betty and it was like????? but what about the quarantine?? how did you get back in?? honestly the first time I watched 3x09, I thought I must have skipped an episode, but NOPE, the quarantine cliffhanger was waved off and I will never forgive them for this.

Secondly, most of this episode is spent in Archie’s feverish dream/hallucination and I just find dream episodes real dull, sorry Archie. I love that Archie tried to box a bear, I mean good for him, but the the dream sequences are boring.

Season 4

Best

A tie between 4x14 and 4x15. I just love these two episodes. The Preppies are legit the best villains this show has ever had (especially Donna, my love <333). There were real stakes for the Core 4, and even though I was pretty sure Jughead was not dead, I was still insanely happy to see him again in 4x15. Betty threatening Donna in the woods while wearing Jughead’s sherpa is a total bamf move, MARRY ME, BETTY COOPER. Jughead’s faux funeral is a+. Even the BA fake dating scheme (before it went horribly awry in the following episodes) is hilarious to me. Like, what kind of horrible plan is this?? if Betty seriously dated Archie following Jughead’s death, she would need therapy STAT, but the town of Riverdale is just like “oh ok I guess Jughead is dead.” Okay, sure. Plus Donna taunting Betty over the fact that she apparently can’t go two hours without needing to bone Jughead and therefore Betty’s plan was doomed to failure. How was this a real scene that happened. Oh my god, these episodes are so great.

Worst.

4x17. I mean, obviously. Please don’t make me have to explain.

[mka1098]

She Wears the Crown of the School and Key of My Heart - A Percabeth Percy Jackson One-shot Fanfiction Story

Want to have the story read out loud for you ? 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnJmrjvaXpo&list=PL_yqxljCzSpIEMPBUYLmUcUnPmSOtc2aN&index=5 

Annabeth Chase. She was the queen of the school no doubt. And she just happened to be Percy Jackson's childhood crush from grade 2. She moved here, sophomore year, and in one year, she had everyone wrapped around her finger. Luke, the popular boy that was set for Yale, Drew the old It girl who lost her status and can't move a muscle again the new queen, Piper, her first friend at the school and now her maiden in waiting. Everyone was hooked on her. First the new girl, now the most popular girl in school. She most certainly had Percy Jackson under her spell. Even as a young 7-year-old, Percy was bewitched. And now, ten years later. He still was. 

"Dude stop staring at her," Grover told his best friend who was watching the queen spin around and around on the dance floor with her king. Her jr prom king. 

"She's so beautiful," Percy said dreamily. 

"Yeah, you say so all the time." Grover rolled his eyes. "I'm going to go talk to my girlfriend over there." The ginger announced and left his smitten friend to just stare. Percy admired her dress, it was simple yet elegant, even amongst this mosh pit of students. 

"It's probably bad to still be in love with the same girl that you've not been dating for 10 years," Percy muttered to himself and moved to the drinks table to snatch a soda. He found the basket of soda's and grabbed the coke. 

Only for another hand to be placed on top of his. And said hand had a french manicure. And remarkably familiar infinity bracelet. 

"Sorry, did you want it?" A fruity voice spoke to him. Percy's eyes went wide and he turned to look at the blonde who had spoken. She had heels on but still, she was a ways shorter than him. Percy stood at 6'3, Annabeth at most was 5'11 with heels. His mouth didn't move and nor did his brain. He was captivated by the beauty in front of him. Her princess curls were twisted up in an updo, with hair framing her face perfectly. Her grey eyes were still strikingly gorgeous, even in the low lighting. Her lips were painted a pink color, like an innocent little princess but the cat eyeliner said that she cut like a queen. 

"Uh, do you still want it?" She said awkwardly. Percy slowly shook his head. She nodded and was about to walk away when without thinking, Percy grabbed her arm. 

"Wait." He said. She looked at him confused. 

"Yes?" She asked. "We know each other!" He said. Annabeth opened her mouth and then closed it before saying a word. 

"...yes." She looked at him suspiciously but Percy broke out into a grin. 

"You know who I am!?" 

"You just said we knew each other."

"yeah, but like do you know my name?"

“Uh, yes Percy I do. Do, uh, you know mine?"

"Yeah!" 

This was a very weird and awkward conversation. But Percy's lovesick brain didn't compute that. At least it wouldn't for a while longer. If you have him maybe 3 more days, it'd catch up and he'd freak out over it.

"Uh, is there anything else you wanted to tell me?" Annabeth smiled politely but it was clear she didn't know what was happening with this conversation. 

"We were in second grade together." Percy gushed out. Annebeth's lips pressed into a tight line. 

"Well, yeah we're in the same grade." She said slowly. Percy shook his head. "No, we were in the same class." Annabeth's eyebrows crinkled together before her face lit up and she snapped her fingers and clapped once. 

"Oh! Percy! I remember now! You gave me this bracelet." She held up the arm Percy was still ahold of. 

"Oh sorry." He let go sheepishly. Annabeth just laughed. \"You're fine." She was all eased up now. "I forgot about 2nd grade, well everything but this here." The blonde twisted her wrist around. 

"Congrats on the crown." Percy pointed to the plastic crown in her hair. Annabeth reached up and touched it. "Oh, yeah thanks." She smiled at him. 

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!" A voice yelled and Annabeth and Percy both turned to face the sound, which was coming towards them. "I knew you were cheating on me!" Luke roared. Annebth's mouth dropped. 

"I- what! I am not." She yelled back. The place went quiet, even the music stopped. 

"You were holding his hand!" Luke yelled back. Annabeth growled. "He was holding my wrist because he recognized the bracelet." She defended herself. 

Percy wanted to die. Was he causing the perfect couple to fight? Yes, yes he was. Great going Jackson. 

"How?!"

"He gave it to me!"

"Oh so now you're accepting gifts from your side dude?"

"Oh my god, WE WERE SEVEN WHEN HE GAVE IT TO ME!"

"And you kept it?!"

"Yes! A gift from a friend."

"I know you're cheating on me."

"I AM NOT!"

Luke snarled at Percy. Percy only looked at him, they were close in height so it was a battle of not looking away. "I'm not anything like that to her," Percy stated. Luke rolled his eyes. "Yeah sure like I believe that. If you're going to be like that, I will too." He growled. 

The Blonde boy's eyes caught onto the nearest girl that wasn't Annabeth and pulled her to him and started furiously making out with the girl. Said girl screamed and pulled away, kicking him in a sensitive spot. Annabeth had no choice but to watch the scene of her boyfriend accusing her of infidelity and then doing it himself. The other girl started screaming at him and slapped him in the face. "And for the record. Annie was loyal to you. You are a pig." The other girl stormed away and no one in the either place spoke. 

"It's over," Annabeth said softly. "I never cheated on you nor thought of it. But if you don't believe me and think it's okay to do it back and kiss a girl without her consent, and still think I'll stay with you, you are crazy." The Blonde queen of the school spun on her heel and walked out the door. 3 seconds passed and Percy ran out after her, hearing the shouts at Luke and lots of soda spilling onto the floor. Odds were the people were protecting the queen, punishing Luke. Percy looked around the area and found the girl walking somewhere. 

"Annabeth." He called, making her turn around. She looked at him sadly. Percy frowned, Annabeth should never be sad it didn't suit her.

"He didn't believe me." Her voice was barely audible, it was clear she was holding back tears. Percy wrapped his arms around her in a tight hug. "He didn't believe me." She said again, he felt water hit his shoulder. Her tears were quiet, just quiet and painful. After a minute the water stopped. She weakly clung to his arms.

"Do you want to away from here?" He asked gently. She nodded and Percy led her to his car and opened the door for her to get in. 

His mom was working late so she wasn't home to question why he was bringing home a crying girl. Annabeth took of her heels and sat down at the couch. Percy went to the kitchen and grabbed 2 ice cream cones. Coming back to the main room, he handed her one and she took it gratefully. 

"Thank you." She said softly. 

"Are your parents expecting you at 12?" Percy asked her. She shook her head. 

"No, I was supposed to stay at Luke's," Annabeth said quietly. Percy nodded, wishing he hadn't said that. After a minute of silence, Annabeth laughed humorlessly. "I never thought I'd be that girl crying in her prom dress." A hand reached up and touched the crown. "Or, I guess the crying prom queen." She laughed hollowly. 

Despite what was going on, Percy couldn't help but admire her dress. It was a light blue color, his favorite color. Mermaid style, it hugged her body and flared out at the bottom. It was off the shoulder and was clearly something a princess would wear. 

"I didn't cheat on him. Not with you. Not with anyone else." Annabeth said softly. Percy nodded his head. 

"You would never. He was a fool to not listen." He said. Annabeth laughed humorlessly and looked up and then back at him. 

"I should have known that would happen. He's always been crazy jealous and asks me about all my male friends." She took a bite of ice cream. "I brought it upon myself didn't I." Her voice was weak, small, fragile. Things Annabeth was not.

 Percy shook his head in disagreement. "No, you just cared for him enough to look past the flaws." Annabeth smiled at him. 

"Thank you. For just getting me out of there. Sorry, I'm invading and running your night." The blonde said shyly. She was not doing such things. "It's okay, I wasn't doing much." He told her. Percy looked at the TV and then back at her. 

"Wanna watch a movie?" He asked. She nodded her head. "Sure."

They put on a funny movie, but soon realized that it was much more fun to do commentary on it. Then they realized it was even more fun to just talk and ignore the movie. Percy told her about his life in high school and things he could remember from grade 2. Annabeth laughed at his stories and told him about her adventures with friends. 

"Really? That was you and Leo?" She laughed. Percy nodded his head. "That was so funny!" Percy was so happy to make her laugh after a night like this had occurred. "Thanks for cheering me up and helping," Annabeth said when her laughter died down. She had a smile this time on her pretty face. Percy tried to act nonchalantly but it probably wasn't working. "This makes us friends now... I think... are we?" She looked so hopefully, like a little owl with those big eyes. 

"Of course!" Percy said with a grin. Even without the cute eyes he would have said the same thing. They were friends now. 

And for the next 3 months, they became closer and closer. He helped her with the breakup, the school had done right by their queen and Luke was no more a beloved king amongst villagers. He was now the lowest of the lows, like dirt or a mouse everyone drove away. The feeling Percy had had since age 7, only grew and grew till he was sure he was completely in love with this girl. It came down to the end of the year party, set at the beach and the entire 11th grade had come out and was planning to have a blast together. Percy was planning to tell Annabeth how he felt, after some 10 or 11 years. 

"Wise girl! My mom made cookies, come help me!" Percy called Annabeth while standing by his car. 

"On my way." She said from the other line. Annabeth did come up to Percy's very blue car. 

"I'll grab these two boxes... and then run away." She laughed before printing away with said boxes. 

"HEY!" Percy yelled after her, locking his car and following her across the beach. 

"Hey Reyna, here the cookies." He smiled at their class president and he and Annabeth stacked the boxes. 

"Hey wise girl. Wanna go for a beach walk?"

That's how they ended up in a secluded part of the beach, not private, just less public. It had lots of palm trees around it and the water was clear as can be, no people or sea creatures to be found. Annabeth had excitedly taken off her coverup and got into the water. Percy tried not to faint from seeing her in a swimsuit. He didn't like her just for her body, but she was a very attractive person. 

"Too slow?" She called out to him. Percy dramatically put his hand to his head and stumbled back. He was a swimmer for goodness sake and a pretty good one. Taking off his shirt he dived into the water after her and grabbed her by the waist, pulling her down to the sand. He let go soon enough so she could get on her feet but her pouty face was too adorable for Percy to say anything too. 

In all honestly, Percy's felt his face warm up, even in cool water by touching her. He ran a hand through his black hair and prayed that she didn't notice the redness splashed on his cheeks. Annabeth's sly face on was on and before he knew it, she ran at him and knocked him on his back, her landing and laughing on top of him. Oh, there's the red. Percy's face was so hot you could probably grill on them. 

"Annabeth." Percy started seriously. The blonde stopped her giggling and corked her head, a sign she was listening. "I have to tell you something." Percy took a deep breath and sat up, Annabeth did so too, sitting next to him on the sand. 

"I li-"

He was cut off by Annabeth's lips on his. The words fizzled out when his brained realized it. Annabeth tasted like lemon drops and vanilla cake. Percy had kissed girls before but this one with Annebth, it was gentle and sweet. It was perfect. Just like her.  

After a few seconds, she pulled apart, but not straying too far. "You may be a seaweed brain and oblivious as ever but it doesn't I am. I've been waiting months for you to finally tell me." She laughed and it sounded like music to Percy's ears. 

"Dang, so I could have kissed you months ago?" He joked. The blonde rolled her eyes. 

"Yeah, you could have. Like since prom." Annabeth told him. Percy looked at her unconvinced. 

"Oh don't give me that look. I kept your bracelet for 10 years. I liked you then and I like you now." She tapped his nose. Percy sputtered. Wait, 10 years ago? 

"Yes," Annabeth said as if she could read his mind, but she was probably just reading his facial expression. 

"I'm kind of glad I waited though. This is the perfect place to kiss you." Percy said after a minute of trying to compute. Annabeth laughed and leaned her head on his shoulder. 

It was a romance over ten years in the making. Finally set off on a night where Annabeth Chase, Queen of the school, and Percy Jackson, a mere villager came together. She had the crown of the school, the prom queen's crown atop her head. But a special monumental, the gift he had given her years ago, the key to his heart and gift to his love, a bracelet on her wrist. And now his heart was in her hands. Whether she decided to squeeze it into dust or protect it at all cost didn't matter. 

Percy Jackson had given his everything to the queen. 

And.

Annabeth Chase gave her everything to the new king.

[softest-cinnamon-roll]

“Just smile, I really need to see you smile right now” - maybe reddie or stanlon or anyone

72.  “Just smile, I really need to see you smile right now”

* * * * *

Leaving Derry was meant to mean a new beginning for all of the Losers. They were finally free from that dreaded down and their twisted families and neighbours. The only person who would be keeping in touch with their parents was Richie, and that was because Maggie and Went were the perfect parents who had practically adopted the whole of the losers club as their own.

Things had really been looking up in the last few months, as Eddie and Richie had finally confessed their feelings for one another and gotten together at Stan and Mike’s makeshift prom at the Barn. It had been a beautiful moment, that is, until Richie announced that he was going to college across the state in California.

Of course, Eddie and the other’s were happy for him, as the course was a scholarship into entertainment and Film studies, something that Richie had always wanted to do. He would be a fool to turn it down. The heartbreaking thing was, that Eddie had been accepted into a medical college in New York City...on the other side of the country.

Any other couple would have called it quits then and there. Ended their romance in order to save their friendship, but Eddie and Richie weren’t any other couple, they were different and determined to make it work. So Richie had moved to California, and Eddie to New York, separated by almost 3,000 miles.

Yet, they made it work. They had a schedule and they stuck to it, never missing a skype call no matter how tired or busy the other became. They knew that if they missed just one call, then it would start up a cycle and they would be in deep water.

It was the hardest when it came to birthdays, as they were so far away from each other, the best they could do was call and wish the other a happy birthday. Which was the case now, on November 3rd, Eddie’s 20th Birthday. He had just finished class, and Richie was on a day off which meant the second he got home, they could skype until Eddie had to go to sleep.

The second Eddie stepped into his dorm, he booted up his laptop and breathed out a sigh of relief that Richie was already online. He clicked his icon and the call connected, Richie’s face filling the screen. “Hey,” Eddie breathed, moving a hand up to touch the screen, heart aching.

“Hey babe, happy birthday,” Richie grinned. Eddie wanted to smile back, but he was just so damn tired, that all he could do was close his eyes. “Babe? Are you okay?”

“Hm,” Eddie nodded his head, rubbing his eyes. “Class was a killer, as always. I’m just exhausted, that’s all. I can’t wait for the holidays because you get to come home and we get to cuddle for two weeks straight.” Since it was Christmas, Richie always came home and the two of them returned to Derry under his mother’s nose to spend it with Maggie and Went.

Richie laughed softly, nodding his head and some of his hair fell into his face. “I can’t wait to hold you. It feels like forever since you were here for summer.” His voice was like a whine, and Eddie desperately wanted to reach out through the computer screen to pull him close. “Did you get my card?”

Eddie frowned, tilting his head to the side and he shook it slowly, “No, I...I haven’t checked my post yet. Just- wait here.” He pointed his finger to his laptop and he rushed back out the door and down the stairs. He pulled open the post and he grinned, as right there was a bright red card, his name and address scrawled on the front in Richie’s handwriting. He closed the box and rushed back to his room, jumping onto the bed, holding up the card, “Got it.”

Just before Eddie could open it, Richie stopped him. “Wait just...I need you to do something for me first. Before you open the card.” Eddie tilted his head to the side and Richie continued. “Just smile. I really need to see you smile right now.”

Unable to help himself or deny Richie anything, Eddie broke into a large smile, tears in his eyes. Richie grinned back and nodded his head, allowing Eddie to open the card. It was a little custom made one, with two boys on the front and ‘Happy Birthday Eds’, scrawled underneath. “Rich...this is great.”

“Sorry I couldn’t get you an actual present,” Richie sighed. “Money is tight right now-” Eddie cut him off with a shake of his head.

“Stop, you don’t need to get me anything. I have you and that’s enough.” Eddie bit his lip. “I’ll see you really soon, yeah? I’m counting down the days until your here. I love you so much, Richie…”

Richie placed his hand on the laptop also and he closed his eyes, “I love you too, Eds. I love you too.”

* * * * *

@richietoaster @tozier-boy @eds-trashmouth @bitchbrak @sloppybitchreddie @its-stranger-than-you-think @maximusfraker @jem-carstairs-is-perfection @thejadeazalea @halfway-happy353 @tinyarmedtrex @inthebreadbinwrites @kat-ships-everything @takeourpure @lo-v-ers @that-weird-girls-blog @studpuffin @s-s-georgie @reddie-for-anything @trashmouthtozierr @richietoizer @girasol-eddie @bi-bi-richie @honeybeehanlon @mars-14 @reddiesetandgo @marsisaplanetyall @xandertheundead @sedanleystanley @hawkinsbabe @beepbeeprichiellc @stellarbisexual @oldguybones @stanleuyris @eduardoandale  @purplepoisonedgem @reddie-to-cryy @pink-psychic @violetreddie @toziesque @queen-sock @appojoos @moonlightrichie @rreddies @disneyfan567 @annxmatron @lifesucksheres20bucks @anellope @roobarrtrashmouth @are-you-reddie-for-it @callmechee @nancynwheeler @reddieforlove @twoidiotsinl0ve @madi-artist @tozierking @s-onora @atownofeggs  @wilding-throught-thehallways @no-she-wasnt-reddie @dadbodrichie @thorn-harvester-ven @eddiekasbpark @sparklingrainbowdragon @ransonelovebot @gloire-celeste @derrylosers @3tothe1 @virgo-luthie @sashadrowned @spirited-marvel @losers-gotta-stick-together @rebecca-the-queen @ultrapaninibred

[pintofteaforthesoul]

A Terrasen Prom

Aelin sucked in her breath, hands gripping the back of her desk chair as Lysandra tugged the zipper of her dress up. Even still, Lysandra hissed, “Suck in!”

Aelin gasped. “If I suck in anymore, my uterus will be in my throat!”

Lysandra snorted, but was able to get the zipper the rest of the way up and step back. Aelin turned, hugging her hands to her chest. Lysandra looked stunning in a deep emerald gown, the top almost shear with leaves embroidered like lace along her chest and arms and a tulle skirt that had a slit up the leg. She was shocked the school had allowed something so scandalous, especially with the low V-neckline, but it suited Lysandra perfectly.

Aelin looked down at her own baby blue dress. It had off-the-shoulder cuff sleeves and a full-bodied skirt with white embroidery dotted along the fabric. Her dream gown really… Aelin frowned, smoothing the skirt with light hands.

Lysandra pulled took Aelin’s hands in her own and Aelin glanced back up at her best friend’s worried expression. Her hair was pulled back in jeweled clip, with soft dark brown curls framing her face. “Are you sure you’re up for this? We don’t have to go…”

Aelin shook her head, straightening her back with confidence she didn’t feel. “It’d be lame if we didn’t go now, especially since we’re already dressed.”

“But Chaol-”

Aelin cut her off, eyebrows furrowing as a pang flashed through her heart. “Chaol can suck my dick for all I care.” But Lysandra knew she was lying, giving Aelin that knowing expression of hers. Aelin’s face dropped. “He broke up with me a week before prom, Lys. Who does that?”

Lysandra hugged her. “An idiot, that’s who. So we’re going to go anyway and he’s going to see just how fabulous you are and regret the day he was born!”

Her voice was filled with such genuine fervor that it made Aelin smile. After a moment, Aelin nodded. “Okay.”

~~~

The Ballroom was extravagant, that’s the only word Aelin thought came close to describing it. Decked in shades of blues, purples, and white, the Hotel Ballroom would make a Queen stop dead in her tracks at its beauty. Three chandeliers sent dancing lights across the floor and walls, making it feel ethereal.

Aelin’s jaw dropped as she and Lysandra swept in along with the other members of their high school- Aelin standing out because she was one of the few sophomores. She squirmed, eyes darting like a nervous doe.

Lysandra reached over and pinched her, causing Aelin to jerk her head over with a hiss. “Stop looking for him, you’ll drive yourself crazy.” It was a hushed whisper and Aelin scowled.

They drew over to one side of the massive room, dropping by the refreshments table to get punch before it got spiked. Finally having an inkling of privacy as the loud music started and people rushed to the dance floor, Aelin leaned over and whispered, “What if he’s here with another girl?”

Lysandra sighed. “Even if he is, she won’t be nearly as pretty or as smart as you.”

The compliment fell on deaf ears as Aelin resumed her scanning of the crowd. Lysandra let her be, knowing Aelin would have to find Chaol before she did anything else- even dance.

But Aelin found someone else, standing in the center of a group of males with his head thrown back as he laughed. His short silver hair nearly glittered in the light, the swirling tattoo down his face still a shock to see amongst high schoolers. He was the school’s own Bad BoyTM and relished in every dirty deed in the book. Aelin hadn’t recognized him at first without his signature leather jacket, but his group of friends were also unmistakable. Aelin shoved her elbow into Lysandra, who cursed loud enough to have several heads turn towards them, but Aelin didn’t care. “Rowan Whitethorn is here!” She struggled to lower her voice so it wasn’t a shout.

Lysandra’s mouth dropped open. “You’re joking! Where?” Her eyes greedily scanned the crowd until she found him- it wasn’t like he blended it. “Holy shit. What is he doing here?”

The girls leaned their heads even closer. “I don’t know! He’s a senior, so it’s fully in his right to come since the ticket it free for them.”

Lysandra still looked dumbfounded. “But he never comes to these things! And I don’t see Lyria with him.” Lyria was the head cheerleader and had been Rowan’s girlfriend for as long as Aelin had ever known. They were practically inseparable, the typical “good girl” falling for the Bad BoyTM. Aelin had always been jealous since they were the school’s Power Couple, not helping that she’d liked Rowan ever since he’d shoved a boy that was messing with her off the playground in fourth grade.

But he’d never paid her any mind, not even once Aelin grew boobs, packed on a decent amount of muscle playing lacrosse, and shot up to be taller than most of the girls in her class. Rowan had only ever had eyes for Lyria and her hot cheerleader body.

Not that Aelin had cared after she’d met Chaol, who’d swept her off her feet with his toned athletic body and meaningless promises- but she’d never forgotten Rowan, or the fluttering thrill his presence sent through her stomach. “Maybe they broke up?” Aelin didn’t dare let herself hope, not with the still-constant ache of Chaol’s dumping her.

“Let’s make sure he sees you, then.” Lysandra grinned like a fiend and, before Aelin could protest, dragged them onto the dancefloor.

~~~

Rowan wanted to leave and he’d been at the prom for less than twenty minutes. He wouldn’t even be here if Fenrys hadn’t threatened to withhold the after-party location if he didn’t show. Sneaking sips from the flask hid in his jacket, Rowan scowled at the people around him- most of whom he didn’t know their names. Lyria was nowhere to be seen, and good riddance. She’d left him for some college guy’s dick, so she wasn’t his problem any longer.

Fenrys nudged him, drinking from a cup of punch that had definitely been spiked by now. “Cheer up, man, you look like death.”

Rowan shook his head. “I wonder why. It’s almost like I didn’t want to come.”

Fenrys only grinned. “It’s our last prom before graduating! You’ll thank me later.”

“I doubt it.” Rowan muttered and Lorcan on his left snorted, the only one who heard. He had also been dragged here by Fenrys with the promise of an after-party.

Fenrys visibly checked out a girl that passed and she blushed, scampering away with her friends. Rowan rolled his eyes, but checked out one of the girl’s friends and winked just for the hell of it. He at least shouldn’t warm his bed alone after putting so much effort into this evening- Rowan was wearing a suit for gods-sake.

While Rowan’s head was turned to the side, following the group of girls as they wandered back to the dance floor, he saw her- and sucked in a breath. Aelin Galythnius. She was twirling in circles with another girl in a dark dress. Rowan’s eyes widened at the pale blue dress Aelin wore, showing off her neck, shoulders, and the enticing swell of her breasts. She was stunning, but that was nothing new. Even though Aelin was only a sophomore, she was already a shoe-in to be Valedictorian of her class. She was smart, talented, and overall- incredible.

Fenrys was talking, but froze at the expression on Rowan’s face, following his gaze to Aelin. “Shit! Is that Aedion’s little sister?”

“Cousin.” Rowan corrected out of habit, shoving Fenrys when the man started to practically drool. Another shove when he wouldn’t stop staring. “Stop. You know Aedion will have our asses if we even look at her the wrong way.”

Fenrys wrenched his gaze away as if it took extreme effort, Rowan had to admit he was feeling the same- his eyes wanting to stray back to Aelin as those hips moved in time to the pulsing music. “Damn, she might be worth an ass-whooping in that dress.”

Lorcan shook his head at them, the only one in their group with a loving and supportive girlfriend and who had no interest in leering at other women. “No girl is worth that shit, but I’ll pay for tickets if you decide to be a dumbass.”

Rowan had to even his breathing, reminding himself of the words he spoke next, “She’s in a relationship, Fen.”

Something dangerous sparkled in Fenrys’s eyes. “You didn’t hear?”

Rowan scowled, crossing his arms over his chest. “Heard what, jackass?”

Fenrys grinned. “Westfall dumped her last week.”

Rowan choked in his drink, having made the mistake of trying to take a drink to calm his nerves. It took him a second to say, “That cocksucker did what?”

Lorcan twirled his glass, disinterested. “I believe he said-”

Rowan’s fists curled. “I know what he said, Lorcan.” The words were a hiss and he took a long breath, running a hand through his hair. “I knew Westfall was dumb, but damn.”

Fen nodded. “I honestly pity him. Aedion must be plotting his murder as we speak.”

“Whose murder am I plotting?” Every muscle in Rowan’s body tensed at the sudden voice. They turned in unison to see Aedion Ashryver standing behind them.

Fen only smirked in his usual fashion. “Chaol Westfall.

Aedion’s head only tilted to the side. “Why would I be killing Chaol?”

Rowan let out a breath, willing his face to remain neutral and wishing he were anywhere but there. Fen’s smile fell, uncertain about giving this news. “He’s your Lacrosse captain, I assumed you knew…”

Aedion now walked closer, his surprising height making even Fen look short. “Knew what, Moonbeam?”

Rowan, now half behind Aedion, shook his head furiously, but Fenrys stumbled on. “About Westfall and your cousin- that he dumped her.”

The look that passed over Aedion’s face in a mere flash was one of pure rage, but Rowan respected his ability to hold it down. “Oh.” He said. “If you’ll excuse me…” Then as fast as he’d appeared, Aedion was gone.

Rowan stared at Fenrys until the man went, “What?!”

Rowan shook his head in unison with Lorcan. “Why the fuck did you do that? It’s none of our business.”

Fenrys shrugged. “He deserved to know.”

Rowan ran a hand through his hair, catching the glint of Aedion’s blonde hair as the man half-dragged his cousin off the dancefloor.

~~~

“Ow! Aedion, you’re hurting me.” Aelin murmured the words as her cousin manhandled her into a corner of the ballroom, glaring away any people nearby. Lysandra had followed them over and Aedion glared at her too, but she held firm.

At last, Aedion hissed, “When were you going to tell me that Westfall dumped you?”

Aelin cringed. “I was planning on it, there just never seemed like a good time.”

Those eyes that were identical to hers held death. “A good time? Aelin! I’ve been friendly with him all week when I should have been kicking his ass!” His voice was damn near close to a shout and the girls both shushed him. They were drawing too many eyes.

Aelin could only sigh. “That’s exactly why I didn’t tell you. I knew you’d react badly.”

A muscle in Aedion’s jaw twitched. “He. Dumped. You.”

She let out a breath, that weight back on her chest. “Thanks for the reminder.” She’d meant to say it sarcastically but her voice broke.

Aedion watched Aelin’s face drop as she fought the tears that wanted to ruin her. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean…”

Aelin shook her head. “It doesn’t matter. It’s over. It’s done. I just want to move on and have a nice night. Is that too much to ask for?” Aedion’s face softened in a way it only did for Aelin.

Lysandra came up and looped her arm around Aelin’s waist. “Who told you anyway?”

Aedion looked almost confused. “Fenrys Moonbeam. He, Rowan, and Lorcan were talking about it for some reason.”

Aelin’s heart gave a discordant thump. “What? Why?”

Aedion shrugged. “You’d have to ask them. They seemed interested for whatever reason.”

Lysandra sent Aelin a knowing glance that made the corner of her mouth turn up. Rowan Whitethorn was talking about her- it was actually a dream come true.

Aedion glanced between them. “Why do you have that look on your faces?”

“No reason.” Lysandra lied and began to pull them away, but Aedion grabbed Aelin’s hand.

“Hey,” His voice was much softer now, serious. Aedion’s face was pressed with worry. “Can we talk about this later though?”

Aelin bit her lip. She didn’t want to, but knew she owed him the story at the very least. “Sure.” Aedion nodded and let Lysandra drag Aelin away.

Several feet away, Lysandra giggled and pulled on Aelin’s arm. “Rowan was talking about you!”

Aelin shushed her by swatting her arm. “Not because he likes me. My break-up is good gossip I guess.” She sneaked a glance over to where Rowan and his friends still stood. As if he could feel her gaze, Rowan looked her way- an odd emotion on his face.

Lysandra seemed to push her in his direction. “You should talk to him. Start some drama, it’d be good for you.”

Aelin’s heartbeat picked up. “Don’t even put those thoughts in my head. Just because we don’t see Lyria, it doesn’t mean he isn’t still with her.”

Lysandra only rolled her eyes. “Then why is he still looking at you?” Aelin’s heart stopped.

~~~

Rowan couldn’t take his eyes off her, especially once those gold-rimmed turquoise eyes had met his and even long after she’d torn them away. Fen nudged him quite harshly and Rowan glared over at him. “What?”

Fen shook his head. “Why don’t you just go talk to her already? You obviously want to.”

“Why?” Lorcan murmured, knowingly. “She’s already on her way over.”

Rowan tensed and the others laughed. He finally glanced over to see Aelin making her way over to them. It almost took his breath away, the way she moved with such confidence. Like a Queen. But it was her face that caught him, the nervous biting of her cheek that was evident even so far away.

Rowan held his breath and when Aelin finally reached them she cocked her hip out, stared them down, and said, “So, you’ve been talking about me?”

Rowan was left speechless, so it was Fenrys who said, “And if we were?”

Aelin turned those eyes on Fen and Rowan could see the miniscule flinch of Fen’s shoulders. Aelin seemed to notice it too and smiled. “You’re Fenrys, right?”

Fenrys looked down at her, but Aelin wasn’t intimidated. “Yeah, why?”

That head tilted to the side, eyes assessing Fen up and down in the way a doctor might. “I’ve seen a couple of your games.”

That usual charismatic Fen smirk was back. “Oh yeah? And what’d you think, little lady?”

Without a beat, Aelin laughed. “That your swings are weak because you don’t use your legs enough.”

Lorcan howled while Fenrys could only gape at Aelin. Rowan was trying to hide his grin behind his hand. Aelin’s eyes flicked to his and that grin spread. Rowan looked at Fen, who was still looking like an idiot, and winked. “She’s got a mouth on her you have to admit.”

Fenrys composed himself, steeling his face to neutral, but it was Rowan who asked, “Anything else we can do for you?”

Aelin bit her lip, eyes flicking over Rowan with a little spark in them. “No, I think that’s it.” And they all watched her strut away, but Rowan could only wait a beat before he followed- right on her heels.

They were in the middle of the crowd when Rowan caught her wrist. The music was pulsing around them, some pop song that was popular but Rowan didn’t know the words. In the small area, Rowan had to draw her back to face him. It was an almost embrace, Aelin’s hand coming up to his chest. He heard her sharp inhale and he asked, “Will you dance with me?”

Aelin grinned. “Yes.”

 ~~~

[A/N]

So this was totally unplanned, just a thought I had at work. If you want me to continue it, let me know. It would be a short story but just fluff pretty much. Maybe some smut but these are much younger characters so maybe not. 

[spacegaywritings]

CoS - Chap 14 “A sky full of stars (but you are the only light I see)“

Summary: <<he asked whether it is a date and Logan is pulling the "i am hereby asking for your consent to call this meeting a date - in the romantic sense" card>>

TW: crying, drama (bit), panic, gay gay gay shit, stargazing, soft stuff, sappy logan, past abuse, trauma mention, talks of past abandonment, mentions of past cheating, mentions of trust issues, mentions of violence, empty threats, weapon mention, stabby threat mention, dry humour, mentions of arson, demiboy virgil, thoughts of being broken, questioning (logan and Virgil).

The drama is short and necessary for HURT AND COMFORT

ao3 : 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 / 12 / 13 / 14 / 15 / 16+ // all

Tumblr: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 /  11 / 12 / 13 / 14 (u are here) / 15 / 16 +  

  My KoFi  - Support me ♥ or Commission me

 Story under the cut: (Wordcount: ~4,7k)

“Ri, please. I will be home in time, I promise.”

 Virgil pushed the cup of coffee closer to Remy in an attempt to appeal to him and somewhat sweeten the deal. The elder sibling eyed the offer with suspicion. Maybe the coffee was not poisoned but Remy might as well treat it as if.

 “Alright, alright. Just .. please be here around midnight? I want to be with you when the next day starts. Just this one thing?”

 Virgil jumped up and emitted a loud squeal.

 “Thanks!!”

 Their dark eyes sparkled with warmth. In no time, Remy was met with a bundle of Virgil in his arms and he giggled.

 “Now now, what is going on with you?”

 He chuckled. His hands brushed through Virgil’s dyed hair.

 “Logan asked me out! We will do things tonight!”

 They giggled more and snuggled up to their sibling with an energetic smile on their lips.

 “Logan? Library kid Logan? I think you told me about him.”

 Remy hummed in thought, still carding his fingers through Virgil’s messy hair.

 “V, do you feel ready to date already? I don’t mind if you do. I will support you, no matter what.”

 Virgil pursed their lips and shrugged.

They wanted to nod but their head did not want to comply.

 “I.. I want to try it. I can, um.. I can tell him I don’t want to go further. At least now. I - I don’t know. I really like him. I like him like I like Dee, you know?”

 Remy nodded sagely and patted their head in support.

 “It’s okay. I don’t wanna roast you about this, anyway. You learned enough in life and if you want advice, I am here for you. I am your wise sibling after all!”

 He smirked.

Virgil groaned and leaned away.

 “Ewww, don’t do that! You’re just old, Ri!”

 Virgil jumped up again and skipped away.

 “I need to, like, fucking dress up and shit!”

 Remy’s laughter echoed through the rooms.

 “Stop laughing you jerk!”, Virgil yelled back from afar, their hurried steps echoing in Remy’s head. He smiled at the rapidly shifting figure.

 Once they were in the bathroom to take a shower,, or whatever Virgil did in there, then in their room, in Remy’s room to probably steal clothes, then in the bathroom again.

Virgil seemed to be seconds away from prom.

Speaking of which, Remy thought they never really had a real prom.

 He got up to make a small meal for his dramatic kid sibling. They might be about to become a legal adult - one who could drink alcohol, too, not just sign contracts - but they were still such a young baby to him.

Probably, Remy would always see the neonate in Virgil he had been marked with when they “met” for the first time.

 He pressed his lips together. He frowned at the toast he prepared.

The professor actually sounded like a suburban supermom who could not cope with the idea of their kid growing up or whatever.

Not that he could cope with it but still.

 “Riiii, I am stealing your jeans!”

 The addressed adult snorted as soon as he heard it. It took him a moment to compose himself and gain enough breath as he dissolved into the tickling giggles and the light-hearted sensation of situational comedy.

His mouth gasped for breath and sucked in the sweet sweet oxygen so he could laugh even more.

 Once he had calmed down, he sighed and put the sandwich together with cheese and put it into a pan to grill it because Virgil liked this kinda stuff. Remy at least gave the kid some fresh fruits too. He glanced at the little bowl of fruit salad he had made earlier.

Yeah, he was not feeding the kid purely bullshit food or anything. He was not a dummy neglectful idiot.

He was supportive. So he would not laugh and go be a supportive sibling.

 “Sure, just turn up the legs, so you don’t fall over or walk on them. I want my pants back as they were - please don’t cut them, I will eat your hair dye.”

 Virgil passed him in the kitchen.

They were so fast, Remy did not even have the time to turn around to properly look at them.

He flipped the sandwich in the pan, letting the heat sizzle and seize the cooler piece of white bread.

 “Yeah, sure, like you would know”

 They stuck out their tongue and Remy half-heartedly glanced at them with no fire in his amused eyes.

He did not have it in his heart to poke fun at Virgil when he knew they could boil over at any moment, considering they were probably anxious about this date thing. Well, Remy assumed this but with Virgil tugging at their sleeves and looking at their hands as they sat there in the most oversized clothes that looked punk yet comfortable enough to hide them away.

Honestly, they were a walking fabric storage.

 The ripped black jeans were too big and gave them an odd artisan air. Virgil also wore a black dress shirt that looked big enough to accommodate the siblings together. It was kept together by their tie with was loosely tied around their neck and had black and red stripes with little metal chains closer to the tip.

They were shiny and silverish.

As always, Virgil had their black and purple, stitched-up mess of a jacket on that served as a mobile cave for them to retreat to.

They had their piercings on as well. Black rings around their lips, purple gauges in their lobes, one gauge each ear. These were hollow inside but one could barely see through them. One of them had a thin, golden hoop through it and the rest were regular piercings: simple golden studs in line with their naturally warm skin tone.

 They were everyone’s emo nightmare and Remy appreciated it.

 “You look great, kid,”

 Virgil rose their eyes to look at Remy for just a moment before tearing their gaze away and back onto their fidgeting fingers.

An audible sigh could be heard. It was short, void of breath, if that made any sense. Almost as if they were physically exhausted from running a long distance without break. Sprinting, perhaps.

 “Oh, Virgil. What is wrong? Who do I need to beat up because I am strong and taller than you and I will take a bitch!”

 Remy flicked his wrist majestically, slowly and ever so dramatically to reveal one single finger sticking out among all other peasant fingers bowing to the Queen of Middle Fingers.

 “I can and will fuck up a bitch because there is no bitch meaner than me.”

 The punk looked at him, eyes weirdly distant. It slowly faded into something like a glare rather than an empty stare into nothingness.

 “If you get arrested for some shit, you would just, like, get your teaching license revoked or something. Sounds like bullshit to me, to be honest.”

 A grin appeared on their lips, it flinched onto them but disappeared as fast as it came up.

 “No, it is okay. It.. just... Anxious and all”, Virgil admitted in a tired voice. They sounded as if energy was lacking but jumped into a rash and pumped up statement after just one moment of pause, “and before you ask, yes, I went to therapy - remember? I texted you and brought you coffee from there.”

 Remy nodded carefully and shut the stove before moving over to approach Virgil. The air smelled of salty cheese and it was as alluring as it was sickening but Virgil was not sure which feeling was overpowering at this moment.

 They nodded and patted the table. Remy nodded back and gave a small smile in appreciation as he sat down with Virgil, keeping his respectful distance.

 “I am scared, um.. just.. anxiety bullshit - not that I am, you know. It is just irrational. Logan is not like this, is not like,, like him, like Nate. Fuck Nate. Logan is not even into chicks, I think. I don’t.. I don’t know, you know? I don’t even know this about him and I am trying to date him and I slept in his bed. Ri, we fucking shared a bed and I don’t even know whether he would cheat on me!”

 Something in Remy’s face changed when Virgil spat out the last part, voice getting red and hot in all-consuming anger and.. betrayal.

They hugged themself and buried their head between their knees.

 “Breathe, please. Are you with me?”

 Virgil shrugged but silently breathed instead of getting further into the conversation. Numbers were counted slowly, it felt like a dragging of time and it was a never-ending burn in their lungs. Their sibling patiently moved closer to hug them and Virgil cuddled up to his chest.

 “I am.. I am being irrational. I know I .. I don’t know all about him but neither does he about me and that is okay because it is just dating and I am not obliged to do anything. I-it feels nice to think about being with him and to be with him and if he gives me red flags, I will shoot him down. I just don’t think he would.”

 Virgil sighed, looking at their hands again.

 “I.. I am doing the right thing. He agreed and we will just have some fun doing dumb things and such. No obligations, no relationship, no stupid cheating.”

 They got up and sighed again.

 “I, um, smell food..? Please tell me you are gonna feed me, I am a beast when hungry.”

 Remy chuckled.

 “Get a snickers, you hoe”

 Their shoulders trembled as they silently snickered.

 “You should eat one. I can bring you disgusting fast food when I come back. Hot cakes?”

 Virgil got their hands onto the plate and plopped the toast onto it in silence. They squipped in happiness and got some cutlery.

 “I will eat everything you have, Ri, just you wait”, they promised with a sense of playful threat. They settled on their chair, silverware clattering as they dropped it onto the wooden table.

In seconds, the toast stuffed their mouth completely and effectively prevented them from communicating any more comprehensive speech.

“Jwuft fwuh wayt!”

 Not that they did not try it anyway. No mortal piece of bread would be able to withstand their sheer will to fucking do it because they could and were not supposed to.

Remy rolled his eyes at the performance.

 “Yeah yeah, keep going with your threats. But thanks, I don’t need hotcakes.”

 The smaller sibling nodded.

 Remy licked his lips seriously. The air changed from a light-hearted playfullness to another shade of depth once more.

 “You can text me”, he took a small break to smack his lips. Virgil looked up at him in an unidentifiable mixture of feelings. “if you feel anxious, that is. I will get to you in an instant if you even have a remotely bad feeling. If your friend, date dude or whatever hot bitch you are excited about, is as kind as you perceive him to be, he will understand anything that will come up even if he does not expect it.”

 Virgil cronched the toast loudly and hummed.

 “Being close to you is about being able to be spontaneous and patient. You know what you need and you know not every person is ready to be this patient and kind. That is okay.”

 Their shoulders slouched but they nodded dejectedly. This was like reading the same story over and over but it still affected them every time they got to its synopsis.

 “ “m nutt yur problm”, they mumbled in reply and curled up on their chair, still chewing. Remy smiled and nodded sympathetically, his heart on his tongue.

 “You are not a problem at all, my heart. You are a stubborn little fuck and you just refuse to die and we will drink on that - as people who refuse to fucking die at all.”

 “Evwer!”

 Virgil swallowed and grinned at Remy, hands suddenly full of energy as they dynamically scooped up the trophy that was a bit of fruit salad.

 “Do I at least look hot? Because I gotta have to blow a nerd off his socks tonight and I wanna do a great job at it. Skirt too much?”

 Remy chuckled but shrugged.

 “I like you dressed this way or in anything else you feel comfortable in. You definitely are staying true to your aesthetics. You and your date will steal for the homeless, I see?”

 The smaller sibling got up to put the dishes into the dishwasher. Their fingers trailed over the machine for a moment as they got lost in thoughts for a bit. Just a moment.

Their phone rang again.

Oh, yes. The alarm.

 “Imma get going. I will steal your keys and a hot fucker’s heart.”

 The keys fell against one another, creating the sweet melody of arrival and departure, endings and beginnings.

Remy looked after them, a little bitterness weighing their smile down.

 Well, it was time to make a cake and wait for Virgil to come back. It would just be a few hours.

 ***

 Virgil slowly walked the last few meters to the door Logan had told them to go to. It was a weird feeling to be visiting the university so late at night. They had not even noticed this had been Logan’s intended meet-up point but once they had closed in, they started growing suspicious.

 The science building was not exactly the place they would usually hang around but alas, it was time to test the waters and get into new things and just dare stuff again, right? Life was about daring new stuff all the time and just going a bit further again and again.

 Their right hand formed a fist around their phone. The display kept shining into the night, showing them the room number they had sent Remy. The chat was open and they would be able to call or text him within moments, if need be.

The fingers were ready for everything.

 They stopped at the door, eyes glancing over the screen to check the number.

Yeah, seemed about right.

Their left hand rose to form a fist and knock the tall door.

 Within less than a second, the door swung open and Logan stood in front of Virgil, towering over them.

He.. he looked special this day. No tie, no pretty shoes. He was in a comfortable set of pants, a loose band shirt of Bunny Smashskull with the eye strain of their neon logo version. Even the shoes were just regular old shoes, sports shoes - they looked and worn yet rather comfortable.

 Virgil was nearly leaning against his chest. They were so close..

 “L-Logan-”

 DAMN IT. They had not been ready for this, apparently!

Well - STOP THE STUTTER! WE ARE ALL GAY HERE, TIME TO STAND UP AND BE A REAL GAY HOE!

….go get him, tiger.

Ew, no, Virgil. You are not a tiger, you are a tiny human and you will go get a Logan-date. Uh, like.. wow, Virgil. Just be a normal dude and be .. you… who is not normal.

Hey wait, is that dude talking? Fuck, fuck, talk to him!

 By the time Virgil caught themself again, Logan’s lips were moving and they did not listen at all. They shifted from leg to leg and coughed into their elbow awkwardly.

 “Uh- Log, I .. I did gay-out for a sec. Wha’did ya say?”

 Logan smiled and nodded. One of his hands moved away from the door handle after a last squeeze and instead closed in on Virgil.

They flinched, staring at the intruder.

 He only offered to take their hand. Just a hand. Nothing else.

Virgil’s heart was beating fast.

 “I was just saying you are stunning as always, Virgil, if not more so.”

 Logan cleared his throat. The smaller of the two gave themself a last mental pep talk before brushing over the insider of Logan’s warm, big hands. The upside of their fingernails scratched against his palm, starting from the naturally caved-in middle and slowly tracing over the Logan’s fingers until they reached his nails.

They swallowed and looked up at Logan, fingers stretched out, still. Then, they slowly crooked them to wrap them around Logan’s patient hand.

 His face lit up like turned-on fairy lights at the gesture. Instinctively, he squeezed.

If anyone else had been there, Logan could never pretend to not care about feelings-y things and interpersonal relationships. The smile on his bright, vivid face was significant and it changed everything Virgil had ever seen about him.

 Their right hand was still clutching their phone, ready to call Remy.

They let go and followed Logan inside, a smile mirroring the taller man.

 Now, their heart was beating for a whole other reason.

Panic was only a nightmare in this room.

 “Let us watch the stars again”

 Logan tugged the smaller emo along, fingers entangled. Hearts beat together like in a drum circle, forming one rhythm and one string of melody.

When they came to a stop, Virgil took in the room properly.

 The older of the two looked at Virgil, blocking their view.

 “Huh? Whaddup, Log?”

 “Can you trust me enough to close your eyes right now?”

 Their right flinched a bit.

Logan was too observant of a person to miss even a single bit of detail about his date, especially. They shrugged.

 “If you scare me, I might break your nose or stab you. You have been warned.”

 Logan shrugged as well.

Apparently, he cared about the lights more than his ribs but who was there to blame him? For him it was a matter of hurt or Virgil and he was more than willing to take a risk for them.

 Virgil was not drunk, was not stupid. They were broken and confused and always scared, vigilant and ready to fight. They were feral.

But they were also just a simple person, wanting love, wanting to be surprised and be courted.

 Eye lids shut down, heavy and trusting.

 His arm rose, one knuckle extended just enough to brush over the light switch and nudge it barely yes just so much, it moved and the light was gone.

 “Thanks. You can open them again.”

 His voice was low, low like the light in the room. They dimmed down together. When Virgil opened their eyes, the world of little like lights and soft atmosphere was opened up to them. The room, the machines and walls, everything, even they and Logan were immersed in the lights of a thousand stars. They were a part of the universe, they were right in it and surrounded by nothing but the darkness of the night and the light of life.

 “...w-wow.”

 They muttered, barely audible.

To be honest, they literally had no more breath. It was away, taken and forever with the stars only. They would not get it back but it was okay. It was an exchange.

Virgil got to stand amidst the myriad of lights in the vast darkness of the universe and they paid the tribute with their own breath.

 Just like it would be if they were in outer space for real.

 “Let us watch the stars we are standing in, Virgil. I want to watch the stars with you.”

 The two laid down and stayed quiet and just relished in the view, in the feeling, in being together.

They were lost but did not need to be found.

 After a while, Virgil spoke up.

Their voice was timid before the stars and planets of the universe.

 “I am sorry about being a little shit last morning. I just.. this was not about you at all and I did not mean to and I know you said it is okay but it is never okay to be shit to someone, even if you have a reason. It is just not an excuse and I was being shitty to you for nothing you did. I just .. I can’t talk to you without feeling guilty and bad, so I got upset.”

 Logan was silent as Virgil squeezed their eyes shut and took a deep breath.

 “I know you only want to assure I am fine because you are worried and that is cool, it is.. it is nice to be cared for, cared about.. it is just still a bit new to me and such a weird concept. The fact you guys took me in within a moment of just.. seeing me? That is so nice and I cannot understand how complete strangers, new people in my life just become friends this loyal and -and kind.”

 Their voice broke. This time, they broke out into sobbing. Instinctively, Logan wrapped his arms around them and hugged them close.

Virgil hid their sloppy self in Logan’s chest. They hugged back with a passion while the taller one had expected a slower and more anxious reaction. The young adults melted into the universe, the the stars and the light of each other.

 “It is okay”, Logan murmured into their hair, “it is okay. It is over now. We care about you. We will continue to care about you, even much later in life. Even if things go wrong. You still deserve a nice life and kind people and every bit of love you can handle or have to learn how to handle.”

 A torn cluster of giggles worked through their sobs.

The waterfall of tears started flowing harder, wetting the band logo of their beloved band Bunny Smashskull.

 “I-I’m sorry”, they cried, “ I.. I mean..”

 They curled up against Logan, suddenly being nothing but a small and fragile being in the middle of the universe.

Lost.

No need to be found.

But still found and still appreciating it.

 “Don’t be sorry for bad things and people happening to you. In life, people experience a lot of aversive events they would rather not witness yet sometimes we cannot do anything about it, especially in younger years of life. Aversive childhood experiences are actually not rare. Usually, everyone experiences at least a few of them. Your way and effectiveness in coping with it depends on your safety net and other positive or healthy experiences to build your self-esteem and other things among this.”

 Virgil snuggled up to Logan and hummed over their sniffles and sobs.

 “I .. I know.. I am coping now and h-ave, like, all this therapy stuff and crisis talks and all this shit with friends and all. It.. It is better but you know, like, a little more than one year ago I would get piss-drunk and set buildings on fire and break people’s noses and fuck shit up and be a whole fucking asshole and hack and fight and break any law I could find. Now I am.. so nice and stable..”

 Virgil sighed and slowly wiped the tears away.

 “I um.. I set something on fire while I was drunk and dumb, I did not mean to do it - anyway, I actually did a good job doing it. I have no regrets. Nobody was hurt but a fraud was uncovered in this whole mess.”

 They shrugged.

 “If you wanna ditch me, ditch me now, I mean.. I am giving you the official permission to throw me out of space-nirvana. Go, on.”

 Virgil lightly pushed against his chest.

 “I am not even sure what kinda sexuality I have. I am just saying gay because I don’t know what else to say and because I know I like dudes and I am not even a dude, like, not fully. I- I am a demiguy and I don’t even use he/him all the time, not even right now. I am a mess.”

 The emo brushed through their hair and snorted.

 “Forget it, you are... you are too good and prefect and great and nice for a messy arsonist and poly-amorous mess of imperfections and societal rejections.”

 “Virgil”

 They shook their head.

 “No. No, it is okay. It is alright. I... I am sorry for just putting this on you all of a sudden and expect you to make a decision. Like, wow, way to be a dick. You are a nice dude, Log. Thank you for the date and the stars. This is the nicest date I ever had in my entire life.”

 Their voice was warm with the wonders of the world.

Logan melted at the idea.

 He carefully brushed over their jaw, still holding them loosely.

 “I will love you, whether you are a man or not. I will love you now and later and when you dropped a book when I made an unfunny joke about chemistry and you laughed. You looked so happy. When you called me for help, you were shattered but you were still full of life and will to live. You met Patton and you two hugged. You never fail to surprise me with your talents. I never knew you were so clever and skilled you could hack, I never knew you fought the government. I never knew but I wish I will never stop to learn more about you.”

 He licked his dry lips and glanced at their lips, at their eyes and pursed their own mouth, letting out a whispered “may I?”

 His voice was soft. It was soft and Virgil blinked, smiled and stormed forward to experience soft lips. Lips softer than anything Virgil had ever felt before.

It touched them deep inside, brushed their heart, let their chest bloom and glow in feelings, in comfort.

 They carefully leaned against Logan and closed the gap their stupid outburst had put between them. Within a fast heartbeat, they rolled over and straddled him.

Chests brushed against one another, pounding themselves into oblivion.

 But together.

 When Virgil pulled back, their lips were flushed and tingly from smooching so much. Even Logan’s usually pale face was tinted with rosy colours and warm tinges of affection and contentment. The two lazily smiled at one another.

 “Consent is sexy, Log.”

 Logan snorted, chuckled, laughed out loud and lost himself in the surge of dopamine. He threw his arms around Virgil and tugged them down so they could press their foreheads together and nudge each other’s nose as if it was the only way to communicate his intense feelings for them, the butterflies and glistening tears of happiness in his mortal body.

 He was happy.

Really, Virgil seemed happy, too.

For the first time in forever, everything just seemed .. okay. The two knew they had found each other to be the thing they did not need but wanted so bad and deserved as much as any other great good in life.

They had.. arrived.

[just-another-obsessed-fangirl]

Lover (2019) Sentence Prompts

feel free to change pronouns and other specific details

How many days did I spend thinking ‘bout how you did me wrong?

Lived in the shade you were throwing ‘til all of my sunshine was gone

I couldn’t get away from you

In my feelings more than Drake

Your name on my lips, tongue-tied

Free rent, living in my mind

But then something happened one magical night

I forgot that you existed

I thought that it would kill me, but it didn’t

It isn’t love, it isn’t hate, it’s just indifference

Got out some popcorn as soon as my rep started going down

Laughed on the schoolyard as soon as I tripped up and hit the ground

I would’ve stuck around for you, would’ve fought the whole town

Would’ve been right there, front row, even if nobody came to your show

But you showed who you are

Sent me a clear message

Taught me some hard lessons, I just forget what they were

Fever dream high in the quiet of the night

Bad, bad boy, shiny toy with a price

You know that I bought it

I’m always waiting for you to be waiting below

Devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes

What doesn’t kill me makes me want you more

It’s new, the shape of your body

It’s blue, the feeling I’ve got

It’s a cruel summer

It’s cool, that’s what I tell ‘em

No rules in breakable heaven

Hang your head low in the glow of the vending machine

We say that we’ll just screw it up in these trying times

We’re not trying

Cut the headlights

Summer’s a knife

I’m always waiting for you just to cut to the bone

If I bleed, you’ll be the last to know

I’m drunk in the back of the car

I cried like a baby coming home from the bar

Said, “I’m fine,” but it wasn’t true

I don’t wanna keep secrets just to keep you

I snuck in through the garden gate every night that summer

Just to seal my fate

I love you, ain’t that the worst thing you ever heard?

He looks up grinning like a devil

We could leave the Christmas lights up ‘til January

This is our place, we make the rules

There’s a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you, dear

Have I known you twenty seconds or twenty years?

Can I go where you go?

Can we always be this close?

Take me out and take me home

You’re my lover

We could let our friends crash in the living room

I’m highly suspicious that everyone who sees you wants you

I’ve loved you three summers now, honey, but I want ‘em all

Ladies and gentlemen, will you please stand?

With every guitar string scar on my hand

I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover

My heart’s been borrowed and yours has been blue

All’s well that ends well to end up with you

Swear to be overdramatic and true

You’ll save all your dirtiest jokes for me

At every table, I’ll save you a seat

I would be complex

I would be cool

They’d say I played the field before I found someone to commit to

That would be okay for me to do

Every conquest I had made would make me more of a boss to you

I’d be a fearless leader, I’d be an alpha type

When everyone believes you, what’s that like?

I’m so sick of running as fast as I can

I’d get there quicker if I was a man

I’m so sick of them coming at me again

If I was a man

I’d be the man

I hustled, put in the work

Shake their heads and question how much of this I deserve

And they would toast to me

What’s it like to brag about raking in dollars and getting bitches and models?

It’s all good if you’re bad and it’s okay if you’re mad

I’d be a bitch, not a baller

They paint me out to be bad

It’s okay that I’m mad

I’m ready for combat

I don’t want that, but what if I do?

Cruelty wins in the movies

I’ve got a hundred thrown out speeches I almost said to you

I jump from the train, I ride off alone

I never grew up, it’s getting so old

Help me hold on to you

I’ve been the archer, I’ve been the prey

Who could ever leave me, darling, but who could stay?

I search for your dark side

What if I’m alright right here?

I cut off my nose just to spite my face

I hate my reflection for years and years

I pace like a ghost

The room is on fire, invisible smoke

All of my heroes die all alone

They see right through me

Can you see right through me?

I see right through me

All the king’s horses, all the king’s men, couldn’t put me together again

All of my enemies started out friends

His footprints on the sidewalk lead to where I can’t stop

His hands around a cold glass make me wanna know that body like it’s mine

He got that boyish look that I like in a man

I am an architect, I’m drawing up the plans

It’s like I’m seventeen, nobody understands

He got my heartbeat skipping down 16th Avenue

Wanna see what’s under that attitude

I want you, bless my soul

I ain’t gotta tell him, I think he knows

I’ll make myself at home and he’ll want me to stay

He’d better lock it down or I won’t stick around

Good ones never wait

He’s so obsessed with me and, boy, I understand

Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh

We could follow the sparks

I’ll drive

Where we gonna go?

You know I adore you

I’m crazier for you than I was at sixteen

I’m lost in the lights

Ripped up my prom dress

Running through rose thorns

I saw the scoreboard and ran for my life

No cameras catch my pageant smile

I counted days, I counted miles 

It’s you and me, that’s my whole world

They whisper in the hallway, “She’s a bad, bad girl”

The whole school is rolling fake dice

You play stupid games, you win stupid prizes

We’re so sad, we paint the town blue

Voted most likely to run away with you

My team is losing, battered and bruising

I see the high fives between the bad guys

You are the only one who seems to care

The damsels are depressed

Boys will be boys, then where are the wise me?

Darling, I’m scared

No cameras catch my muffled cries

I don’t really wanna fight, ‘cause nobody’s gonna win

I think you should come home

I’ll never let you go, ‘cause I know this is a fight that someday we’re gonna win

She’s a bad, bad girl

High, like your friends were the night that we first met

Went home and tried to stalk you on the internet

I’ve read all of the books beside your bed

Cold, like the shoulder that I gave you in the street

Cat and mouse for a month or two or three

Now I wake up in the night and watch you breathe

Kiss me once ‘cause you know I had a long night

Kiss me twice ‘cause it’s gonna be alright

Three times ‘cause I waited my whole life

I like shiny things, but I’d marry you with paper rings

I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this

You’re the one I want in paper rings, in picture frames, in dirty dreams

In the icy outdoor pool, when you jumped in first, I went in too

I’m with you even if it makes blue

Takes me back to the color that we painted your brother’s wall

Without all the exes, fights, and flaws

We wouldn’t be standing here so tall

I want to drive away with you

I want your complications too

I want your dreary Mondays

Wrap your arms around me, baby boy

Drunk on something stronger than the drinks in the bar

I rent a place on Cornelia Street

We were a fresh page on the desk, filling in the blanks as we go

As if the street lights pointed in an arrow head leading us home

I hope I never lose you, hope it never ends

I’d never walk Cornelia Street again

That’s the kinda heartbreak time could never mend

I get mystified by how this city screams your name

I’m so terrified of it you ever walk away

Jacket ‘round my shoulders is yours

Memorize the creaks in the floor

Back when we were card sharks

I thought you were leading me on

I packed my bags, left Cornelia Street, before you even knew I was gone

You called, showed your hand

I turned around before I hit the tunnel

Sat on the roof, you and I

You hold my hand on the street

Walk me back to that apartment years ago

We were just inside barefoot in the kitchen

Sacred new beginnings that became my religion

Saying goodbye is death by a thousand cuts

Flashbacks waking me up

I get drunk but it’s not enough

The morning comes and you’re not my baby

I look through the windows of this love even though we boarded them up

Chandelier’s still flickering here

I can’t pretend it’s okay when it’s not

I dress to kill my time

I take the long way home

I ask the traffic lights if it’ll be alright, they say, “I don’t know”

What once was ours is no one’s now

The only thing we share is this small town

It was a great love, one for the ages

If the story’s over, why am I still writing pages?

My heart, my hips, my body, my love

Tryna find a part of me that you didn’t touch

Gave up on me like I was a bad drug

Now I’m searching for signs in a haunted club

Our songs, our films, united we stand 

Our country, guess it was a lawless land

Quiet my fears with a touch of your hand

Paper cut stings from out paper-thin plans

My time, my wine, my spirit, my trust

Tryna find a part of me you didn’t take up

Gave you so much, but it wasn’t enough

But I’ll be alright, it’s just a thousand cuts

I love my hometown as much as Motown

Something happened, I heard him laughing

I saw the dimples first and then I heard the accent

They say home is where the heart is, but that’s not where mine lives

You know I love a London boy

He likes my American smile

Like a child when our eyes meet

Darling, I fancy you

I guess all the rumors are true

Boy, I fancy you

Now I love high tea

You can find me in the pub

We are watching rugby with his school friends

Show me a gray sky, a rainy cab ride

Babes, don’t threaten me with a good time

God, I love the English

Doesn’t have to be Louis V up on Bond Street

Stick with me, I’m your queen

The buttons of my coat were tangled in my hair

I didn’t tell you I was scared

That was the first time we were there

Holy orange bottles, each night I pray to you

Desperate people find faith

Now I pray to Jesus too

Soon you’ll get better

You’ll get better soon ‘cause you have to

I know delusion when I see it in the mirror

You like the nicer nurses

You make the best of a bad deal

I just pretend it isn’t real

I’ll paint the kitchen neon

I’ll brighten up the sky

I know I’ll never get it, there’s not a day that I won’t try

I hate to make this all about me, but who am I supposed to talk to?

What am I supposed to do if there’s no you?

This won’t go back to normal, if it ever was

It’s been years of hoping

I keep saying it because I have to

You’ll get better

We were crazy to think that this could work

Remember how I said I’d die for you?

We were stupid to jump in the ocean separating us

Remember how I’d fly to you?

I can’t talk to you when you’re like this

Staring out the window like I’m not your favorite town

I’m New York City

I still do it for you, babe

They all warned us about times like this

The road gets hard and you get lost when you’re led by blind faith

We might just get away with it

Religion’s in your lips

Even if it’s a false god, we’d still worship

The altar is my hips

We’d still worship this love

I know heaven’s a thing, I go there when you touch me, honey

Hell is when I fight with you

We can patch it up good

Make confessions and we’re begging for forgiveness

Got the wine for you

You can’t talk to me when I’m like this

Daring you to leave me just so I can try and scare you

You’re the West Village

You still do it for me, babe

You are somebody that I don’t know

Taking shots at me like it’s Patrón

Damn, it’s 7 AM

Say it in the street, that’s a knock-out

Say it in a Tweet, that’s a cop-out

I ain’t tryna mess with your self-expression

I’ve learned a lesson that stressing and obsessing ‘bout somebody else is no fun

Snakes and stones never broke my bones

You need to calm down

You’re being too loud

Can you just not step on my gown?

You’re coming at my friends like a missile

Why are you mad when you could be glad?

Sunshine on the street at the parade

You would rather be in the dark ages

Making that sign must’ve taken all night

You just need to take several seats

Try to restore the peace

Control your urges to scream about all the people you hate

Shade never made anybody less gay

We see you over there on the internet

Comparing all the girls who are killing it

We figured you out

We all know now we all got crowns

I blew things out of proportion, now you’re blue

Put you in jail for something you didn’t do

I pinned your hands behind your back

Thought I had reason to attack, but no

Fighting with a true love is boxing with no gloves

Chemistry ‘til it blows up, ‘til there’s no us

Why’d I have to break what I love so much?

It’s on your face and I’m to blame

It’s all me in my head

I’m the one who burned us down

It’s not what I meant

Sorry that I hurt you

I don’t wanna do this to you

I don’t wanna lose this with you

It’s all me, just don’t go

Meet me in the afterglow

It’s so excruciating to see you low

Just wanna lift you up and not let you go

This ultraviolet morning light below tells me this love is worth the fight

I lived like an island, punished you with silence

Went off like sirens

Tell me that you’re still mine

Tell me that we’ll be just fine even when I lose my mind

Tell me that it’s not my fault

Tell me that I’m all you want even when I break my heart

I promise that you’ll never find another like me

I know that I’m a handful

I know I never think before I jump

You’re the kind of guy the ladies want

There’s a lot of cool chicks out there

I know that I went psycho on the phone

I never leave well enough alone

Trouble’s gonna follow where I go

One of these things is not like the others

When it comes to a lover

I’m the only one of me

Baby, that’s the fun of me

You’re the only one of you

Baby, that’s the fun of you

I promise that nobody’s gonna love you like me

I know I tend to make it about me

I know you never get just what you see

I will never bore you, baby

There’s a lot of lame guys out there

We had that fight out in the rain

You ran after me and called my name

I never wanna see you walk away

Living in winter, I am your summer

Hey kids, spelling is fun!

There ain’t no I in “team”, but you know there is a “me”

You can’t spell “awesome” without “me”

School bell rings, walk me home

Sidewalk chalk covered in snow

Lost my gloves, you give me one

“Wanna hang out?” Yeah, sounds like fun

Video games, you pass me a note, sleeping in tents

It’s nice to have a friend

Light pink sky, up on the roof

Sun sinks down, no curfew

20 questions, we tell the truth

You’ve been stressed out lately, yeah, me too

Something gave you the nerve to touch my hand

Church bells ring, carry me home

Rice on the ground looks like snow

Call my bluff, call you “Babe”

Have my back every day

Stay in bed the whole weekend

My love was as cruel as the cities I lived in

Everyone looked worse in the light

There are so many lines that I’ve crossed unforgiven

I’ll tell you the truth, but never goodbye

I don’t wanna look at anything else now that I saw you

I don’t wanna think of anything else now that I thought of you

I’ve been sleeping so long in a 20-year dark night 

Now I see daylight

Luck of the draw only draws the unlucky

I became the butt of the joke

I wounded the good and I trusted the wicked

Clearing the air, I breathed in the smoke

Maybe you ran with the wolves and refused to settle down

Maybe I’ve stormed out of every single room in this town

Threw out our cloaks and our daggers

Because it’s morning now

It’s brighter now

I can still see it all in my mind

All of you, all of me, intertwined

I once believed love would be black and white (but it’s golden)

I can still see it all in my head

Back and forth from New York, sneaking in your bed

I once believed love would be burning red

It’s golden like daylight

You gotta step into the daylight and let it go

I wanna be defined by the things that I love

Not the things I hate

Not the things I’m afraid of

The things that haunt me in the middle of the might

You are what you love

[t-diggitydawg]

analysis of the uswnt fashion choices simply because i want to fight me woso tumblr

Tierna Davidson: y’all know she’s my fave. my absolute number one. but im pretty disappointed by her dress choice. i love the color, other than that it’s so boring and plain. i think the one shoulder exemplifies that. it just reminds me of a prom dress. to be fair while she doesn’t dress horrible tierna isn’t miss fashion and this is exactly something she would wear. im sorry i have high expectations for my fave okay. sue me. 7/10 (ok i changed it to 7 bc it looks a lot better in the pic she took with becky abby and sam) (to be fair it looks so much more boring farther away since you can’t see the details on it)

becky sauerbrunn: when i first saw becky i first thought “UGH QUEEN” because that’s always my first reaction with Becky? but after a little bit i have to admit i’m not feeling it. i think it could have been better, i don’t know how because i’m not a fashion designer. i like the pattern, that’s unique, and the color is pretty good. just something about it irks me. i do appreciate it being more unique. 7/10

lindsey horan: full disclosure, simple sheek stuff appeals to me. so im loving lindsey’s look okay!! only complaint is the cut is a little awkward on her body type i think. maybe would have been better if it was just straight across (idk fashion terms) 8.7/10

allie long: i don’t know what to feel. i don’t hate it, but i don’t particularly like it either? kind of my feelings for long in general so makes sense. for some reason it makes me think of pajamas? her wedding dress was 👌🏻 so i know she can do better. 5/10

kelley o’hara: an enigma. how does she do it. her outfit isn’t out of this world, but it really just works for her? the pants are a little weird but with how trashed kelley has been the past couple days i can forgive her as she was probably still drunk while picking them. like last time she seriously had a yellow floral dress on and the fact i still remember it means it had a good impression. good job kelley 8/10

tobin heath: oh tobin. i fucking hate suit shorts. they are so ugly. but you make it work. don’t get me wrong it still is appalling but you work it. the fact you are wearing those shoes make it even better, another crazy thing. it’s probably because your other crazy outfit choices just neutralize this one. 6.5/10

alex morgan: oh alex. you can do so much better. it isn’t horrible but it looks like something a 15 year old would wear to their winter formal. we know what you can do, please do it 5/10

emily sonnett: i like it! the top is a little weird but manageable. reminds me of toilet paper. also the part where the white and black meet looks weird. ok so maybe i don’t like it as much as i did starting this. 5.5/10

crystal dunn: i LOVE the bottom of the dress but the top is so unflattering. reminds me of workout clothes or something. would look better if the dress started to flow out higher on the waistline 6/10

megan rapinoe: i trusted this bitch. when she was shown on tv, i could only see the top half of her outfit and i was impressed. a simple black suit jacket and bad ass jewelry. looked like a rocker chic. when i saw her full outfit i died of mortification. would have looked better if the leather shorts were pants. and if she didn’t have those fucking white socks. oh pinoe. my eyes are bleeding. -2/10

carli lloyd: she’s fine i guess. another disappointment because when i first saw her i was like damn!!!! but the fact that it’s a shorter dress with a particular cut that makes her look like she’s attending a funeral makes this look underwhelming. well maybe she’s wearing it because she’s mourning her international career idk 6.5/10

christen press: omg i died seeing her. LOVE the yellow!!! LOVE the black heels!! D. E. A. D. only complaint is i think if the pants weren’t as wide it would have looked a lil better. but that’s me nitpicking 9.5/10

ashlyn harris: oh ashlyn. i like parts of your outfit, and hate other parts. i do like the mesh, not the gray armour shit though. 3/10

rose lavelle: damn girl!!! the white looks really good on her, and i loveeee the off the shoulders look, v elegant. wish it was a longer dress because it would have looked even better. 8/10

mal pugh: at first i barfed, but now im like “okay fine” it just looks like she got fabric from joanne fabric and wrapped it around herself. i have to admit she looked better in that pic with rose. still we know her potential and she didn’t come close to it 5/10

ali krieger: yessss ali!!!! she looked gorgeous! very classy. never have been a fan of the weird cut out she had in her dress but she made it work! now please help ashlyn 9/10

moe brian: love the color! and the dress. but still she could have done a lil more. i know i love plain simple shit, but it was a little too much simple for me. i May be contradicting myself since i loved lindsey’s look, but again fight me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 7/10

sam mewis: i was underwhelmed by this? it just didn’t seem to fit her well. i like the outfit in general, but it just didn’t work. it really bothers me because it’s a cute look but i still didn’t like it lol 6/10

abby dahlkemper: i have the same dilemma here. it isn’t bad, rather cute i guess, but could be better. i think it just doesn’t fit with her. yep that’s it 6/10

AD franch: i wish she went with a darker suit, i think that would have looked even better. but still, like how we can depend on AD to have a good old typical suit 7/10

alyssa naeher: y’all remember when alyssa literally showed up as a nun last ESPYS??!?!? soooo underwhelming and boringggg. but look at this bitch now!!!! im so shook!!! get it girl!!! and also those shoes are super cute!!! ive been dogging on all the short dresses but i can’t say anything bad about this one!! Maybe it’s because it’s alyssa and it’s just so surprising who the fuck knows but wowww queen!! 10/10

jessica mcdonald: she looks nice. again not really a fan of the dress being short but i like the color. she earns bonus points for her cute lil son and his suspenders 😭😭😭 8/10

[wannabe-bassplayer]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MiwNa5F9tyg Shut up, count your calories I never looked good in mom jeans Wish I, was like you Blue-eyed blondie, perfect body Maybe I should try harder... You should lower your expectations I'm no quick-curl barbie I was never cut out for Prom Queen If I get more pretty, do you think he will like me? Dissect my insecurities I'm a defect, surgical project It's getting hard to breath There's plastic wrap in my cheeks Maybe I should try harder... You should lower your beauty standards I'm no quick-curl barbie I was never cut out for Prom Queen If I'm pretty, will you like me? They say beauty, makes boys happy I've been starving, myself, carving Skin until my bones are showing Teach me how to be okay I don't want to down-play, my emotions They say beauty is pain You'll only be happy If you look a certain way I wanna be okay I wanna be okay

[xo-dailypier-blog]

this is not a recap;

     hey cumguzzlers,

It has come to my attention that Lady X took it upon herself to rate the nether regions of the men of Santa Monica. Unfortunately her assessment was BIASED and hardly based on facts. So as a JOURNALIST, I have taken it upon myself to get to the TRUTH. Today will be a Top 9 list of the men in this town, and their BEDROOM PERFORMANCES.

I’m not revealing actual sizes, because I firmly believe that it’s all about the motion of the ocean. And if you think I’m giving a run down on every SCRUB in this town, you’re out of your mind! I WISH I could have made this a Top 10 but most of the guys on Lady X’s assessment, have already been exposed in the fuck hut tapes during Summer Crush, and honestly? Don’t even make the cut for the top 5. Like, we KNOW the #DemonDick is low-key worth the hype (BUT YOU SHOULD STAY AWAY FROM IT BECAUSE HELLO? IT RUINED TWO RELATIONSHIPS IN LIKE THE SPAN OF A DAY! AND IM SURE THE BUCK DOESNT STOP THERE!), and we GET IT, Adam has a massive ROD, and I’m sure (Power Top) Asher, his brother, isn’t that far off. Vic IS well endowed AND can make things EROTIC. And we all know about Jack, who is also well endowed but has, like, erectile dysfunction or whatever. Oh, and don’t forget Daddy Sorrentino is obvs a beast in the sheets, but I’ve been telling you guys that since, like, ever. And I’m honestly on a Jamie/Cunty Sabbatical atm, they’re going through a difficult time after Cunty cheated, so who really needs their dick-info broadcasted on top of all that, ya know? (Cunty deff comes in at an alleged 9 inches, which is bigger than Jamie, BUT he (Cunty) never uses his junk on Jamie because, like Asher, Jamie is a Power Top. (but you didn’t hear this from me). Look, if any guy is left off the list that you have interest in, like, just ask Phobe. I’m sure she’ll know.

But before we get started, Congratulations are in order! You guys voted on Hottie of the Moment, and we have a winner!

It’s none other than Miss Fraudi Zirconium herself (@heidistarks​) The queen of bargains has stormed onto the scene in her Wild Fable Couture and has CAPTIVATED the hearts of all Santa Monicans. In honor of her win, I am giving everyone a $25 gift card to Claire’s! If you go to their website and use offer code SharkThot, you too, can get the Heidi Look. When asked about her recent accomplishment she had this to say:

"It's about fucking time." - Fraudi Zirconium Stark, 2019

Congratulations, again Fraudi! You go girl, work that Forever 21 tracksuit, bitch!

NINE - ALEC CLARKE @alecxclarke​

One of the wangs in question that Lady X TOUCHED ON was Alec Clarke. She mentioned that Alec was more than likely LACKING in the his SOUTHERN MEAT DEPARTMENT. So obvs i had a BONE to pick with this assessment because Alec’s fan base is GETTING UP there with Jamie Carter’s so we have to know what he got in them jeans. Sadly ... while his junk is fine. His way around the bedroom is is abysmal, I honestly thought it was a PHALL-ACY but one girl who is one of his past flings, wrote to me after seeing Lady X’s post. She has asked to remain anonymous...

Hey DP (and Lady X),

I saw your post about Alec and you’re wrong about his size. He’s actually pretty girthy and lengthy or whatever. But he is honestly one of my worst encounters. We met on a dating app, that shall remain nameless. So fast forward to sexy time, and once we started making out it was a tragedy! No tongue, no passion. It was like kissing a mcfucking corpse! His lips were like, so dry, but, whatever, that’s not the problem. Once I started giving him a blow jay he just randomly burst into tears, and said he couldn’t do it anymore, and asked if I wanted to play fucking Yahtzee. I left and bought Listerine. I think you should look into if he is like this with all the girls, instead of his size. Bc that’s the real tea. Anyways, Love the Blog! Kisses!

Its always such a disappointment when this happens. OBVIOUSLY our HoneyBun Alec has some issues to work on. I know he has a Crazy life but I didn’t think things were this HARD for him.

Overall Rating: N/A

Favorite Position: Again, N/A. I could hardly find girls who’ve had sex with him ................. INCHresting. (Ok, that was the last one).

Downside: I mean, Hello? He breaks out in tears mid-coitus! He IS the downside!

Alec! Write into us with your side of the story! I prom (half a promise) that I won’t believe the rumors. Love ya, Honey Bun!

EIGHT - SKYLER DAVIS @skylerxdavis​

No idea where Lady X got the idea that he had the biggest LOVE MISSLE in town, but it is absolutely FALSE. And in fact, what I’ve heard about his performance in the bedzzzZzZzZzzzzzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzZzZzzzz ZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz

Overall Rating: zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz

Favorite Position: zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz

Downside: zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz

Alleged Body Count: zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz

SEVEN - NOAH SINCLAIR @nhsinclair​

So next on the list is Noah Sinclair. This one will be brief, because it really threw me for a loop. So I’m sorry to report, that Noah has a Chode. I know. I’m actually crying while typing this but this is only the word on the street, so take it with a grain of salt.

“Darla” (fake name) wrote in to my blog to refute Lady X’s claims. She writes:

I’ve had half way sex with Noah one time and when he dropped his pants I literally laughed. Not to body shame or whatever, but I, like, couldn’t have sex with him because the condom didn’t fit. Sorry, didn’t have a Trojan Jr readily available? He’s good with his hands though.

So Noah has made the list in a sad and unfortunate entry. So ladies if you want Noah to DIP his NUGGET in YOUR sauce, you better make your move!

Maybe this is why he got that divorce. Ugh, poor Natasha. Let’s hope this is all a rumor, I would hate for it to be true.

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️ (The hand thing is kind of important).

Favorite Position: Noah’s Nugget Number (No clue what this means, ask Diana or Natasha).

Downside: There is no downside if you, like myself, are privy to a good Nugget or two. #RanchPlease

MOVING ON!

SIX - LOGAN LANCASTER @loganlancaster​

Our next entry is none other than Long Dick Logan Lancaster. According to Lady X, Logan is average. Well I’m here to let you know that, thankfully, LDL lives up to his name (no nuggets here!). But you guys would have to get with him to truly find out how #blessed he is.

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Favorite Position: Alligator Fuckhouse, according to sources. (DON’T Google it, live in ignorance).

Downside: The only reason, ya boi has gotten 4 stars instead of 5 is because of the rumors surrounding his hygiene. As we know, there’s been a debate on the internet about washing your legs. And Logan, an able bodied man, doesn’t do that. Nor does he take showers the way that he should. Many girls who’ve been with him have complained of smelling the stinch of onions and mildew while ENGAGING with him. Others have complained of a SALTY taste while going down on him. Most of the girls he’s BANGED have all been in the junkyard of his Auto Shop or whatever so maybe it’s a fetish for them? That’s no excuse for bringing that nasty ass behavior to every other girl in Santa Monica.

Thankfully a bunch of you have been sending body wash to his shop, so maybe we can LanCAST the mustiness away (If this is true).

Logan, please write in, I need to know the truth. But other than that, the dick is BOMB! But make sure you don’t over-do it on B.J. part though, sodium intake is v important and you wouldn’t want to get hypertension suckling on his salty ass COCK.

FIVE - EMRE YOGIOH @emre--yavuz

Ok, so next on the list is Emre Yugoslavia (or whatever his name is). Ok so ... buckle in ladies.

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Favorite Position: The Lion King (I’m serious, don’t Google these things).

Downside: Ok, so Emre is supposedly into bondage. Which totally makes sense since he’s like, repressed from childhood. The whole missing sister thing really took a toll on his psych, since he’s parents totes forgot about him. Now he YEARNS for control. So the word is that he’s basically Christian Grey but not a literal abuser. He’s into bondage, slapping, SPITTING, choking, flogging, and whips and chains EXCITE HIM. An S&M Daddy! Now the only reason this is in the Downside section is because it’s not everyone’s cup of tea. Some girls find it disturbing, and others are totes into it. I’m the latter! Sign me the FUCK up! Choke me with those strong REPRESSED hands.

I noticed he and Olivia have been friendly recently, let’s hope she knows that she’ll be walking side to side after a night with him (no, but like, because of the flogging, not the dick). Once he’s done with those spread sheets at his hoity-toity big boy job, spread sheets take on a whole new meaning once the dawn comes. You go Emre Yahooligan! #callme

FOUR - DEVIN FLORES @devinxflores

First of all, I just want to give a big thanks to all of you for letting me call him Devin TORRES for the past few MONTHS like a complete MORON! I really appreciate you guys letting me disgrace the future KING of Santa Monica in such a terrible way! No really, you guys are the best. I love my fans <3.

Anyways, it’s well known that Devin and his Alaskan Bull Worm have burrowed through the city. Both the men and women alike have survived the DF experience, with ZERO complaints .... well, except for one ...

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Favorite Position: The Charizard (ONCE again, don’t Google. Just know that it involves fire ... And we aint talking about lighting no candles (which he allegedly seems to enjoy, how romantic!)).

Downside: As we have witnessed, Devin is a complete and total klutz! He is always getting himself into a bullshit that is literally all his fault. Didn’t he glue something to his head a few weeks ago -- actually, you know what? That’s not important. What I was getting at is, the main complaint about DaddyDevinFLORES is that during SACX the klutz JUMPS OUT. He has been rumored to have smacked his head on the headboard whilst switching positions (causing him to go UNCONSCIOUS for SEVERAL HOURS, which completely RUINS the mood). One of his Encounters even claimed that during a Romantic Toast of Wine, he clinked the glass so hard it broke and and SHARDS of GLASS went into his hands, causing him to bleed INSTANTLY. What the fuck, Devin?

How could someone who can handle balls so well out on the soccer court, not be able to handle them in the bedroom without accidentally falling out of a window in the process?

Ladies and Gents, much like Emre, Devin will have you walking Side to Side, but if it happens you might be suffering from brain damage after falling in the shower whilst trying to have sex with him. Please seek professional help immediately.

THREE - BERNBERN<3 @carverberncrd

Coming in at Number 3 is none other than Heidi’s personal play thing! We’ve seen his bulge through his Under Armour spanks, so Of Course I had to do a little research to find out the Lipton on HIS heat-seeker. I’ve reached out to his past flings and came to a general consensus.

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

The women I interviewed all confirmed he is an excellent LAY, so once again, I was right. BernBern<3 outsold your favs.

Favorite Position: Doggystyle (obvi)

Downside: He’s a Taurus so while he will indeed fuck you into a state of paralysis, it’s only to reach his Hedonistic Quota for the evening. He probs won’t even remember your name once he’s done, let alone learn it in the first place. So don’t get attached<3.

His star sign also explains his relationship with Fraudi. Not only are they both so annoyingly stubborn, but Two tops can rarely make it in a relationship. Just ask Ash — never mind. (Omg, btw Idk WHY everyone keeps asking. YES, the rumors are true! BernBern<3 gets pegged, but only by Heidi, it’s actually a testament to his masculinity and how he’s reached the apex of it at this point. But this is all old tea. So I guess Julian isn’t the only #DemonDick in the Stark Fam, Surprise?). Anyways, I ship them, but they get on my fucking nerves! They can’t even admit their undying love for each other, which is so obvious. But this isn’t about #Berni (working ship name), BernBern<3 has a massive COCK (and heart) and it has landed itself on the Top of the list.

TWO - SINRIQUE @itsenriqueaguilar

This one came as a surprise to me because I have no idea who this is. But yalls asses do! So here we have Enrique Aguilar, coming in at number 2 because of the OUTPOUR of receipts on the TALLY WACK ATTACK that he PACKS.

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Favorite Position: You know, there wasn’t a general consensus, he’s a man FULL of surprises.

Downside: No, you don’t understand, there is literally no downside. Look, here is a letter from one of the women he’s slept with. For reasons, you will understand REAL soon, this person has been kept anonymous.

Dear DP,

It’s been approximately 1 year, two months, 9 days, 5 hours, and 46 seconds since I Locked Eyes with Enrique from across a crowded room. That night would go to be on of the most invigorating, tantalizing, and romantic experiences of my life. But when I woke up the following morning HE was gone. I long for the day I see him again. My heart Aches at the thought of him with another women. Giving her the same love that HE gave to ME. I need you to understand that I was a grade A student at my university (4.0). I had an paid internship at an elite institution that OWULD HAVE LED ME INTO A PROMISING CAREER! BUT AFTER THAT NIGHT I BECAME RAVENOUS. I NEEDED MORE. AND IT CONSUMED ME! EVENTUALLY I LOST MY INTERN BECAUSE I STOPPED SHOWING UP! I FLUNKED OUT OF SCHOOL BECAUSE I DIDN’T CARE ANYMORE. I SEARCHED YOU ON ALL SOCIAL MEDIA BUT I COULDN’T FIND YOU! ENRIQUE I NEED YOU BACK IN MY LIFE! JUST FOR ONE MORE NIGHT! PEASE I KNOW YOU’RE OUT THERE! CALL ME AT [redacted]

Obviously Ivy, sent this in ... kidding (But honestly though? They did used to date, which ... yikes ... Good to know Daddy Rique has no standards, maybe we all have a chance. #shade #clapback #scalpt)

Anyways, I’ll have to keep an eye on this one, he seems to have a good head on his shoulders ... AND good head on his shoulders OKURRRRRR!!!

ONE - SEBASTIAN DELGADO @bashdelgado

That nerd that sat in the back of the classroom brainstorm his next nerdy ass invention with high-watered khakis, and orthopedic shoes in like, the ninth grade (because he was focused on Arch Support???????). That’s him, Sebastian Delgado. And Baby Daddy Bash has DITCHED the NERD LOOK and is now ready to SNATCH YOUR CAT BACK.

I’m sure everyone is just surprised as I am. But hey, they don’t call him “Bash” for nothing (except for the fact that it’s a shortened version of his name). He’s totes Bashing Puss with his MONSTROUS MEAT TRUNCHEON (and Buss?? Sebastian contact me about your sexuality).  

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Favorite Position: Missionary, he’s a man of passion and likes to stare DEEP into your eyes. #swoon #romantic #westan

Downside: Well if you HATE Love and AFFECTION, this one is not the one for you. Not only does he have a GINORMOUS, UN-NUGGETED MEAT SEPTOR/LAP ROCKET/VAGINA MINER, which, by the way, last a LONG time, He is EXCELLENT BOYFRIEND Material! He’s caring, patient, kind, resourceful, loyal, and he is well on his way to becoming a multi-millionaire -- which is NOT the reason he is number one! Money is not the goal here ladies (and guys? Seriously Sebastian, I need to know what’s up).  

Sebastian is the complete package and he has ALL of the other guys in this town QUAKING!

So Stan A True Man. Stan .... Sebastian.

And that, my friends, ends the TRUE tea on the wangs in this town. This was fun while it lasted, but I have some COCKtails that need my attention (ok, maybe THAT was the last one).

xo, DP

[youremypride]

Prom Night

♫ Carmel is said to be the most romantic city to visit for lovers for a short vacation or honeymoon. Known for its natural scenery and beautiful sightseeing places, Carmel is truly a lovers’ paradise. Over the years, the number of visitors had increased, mostly couples, but not because of its beauty or enchanting little town. Every town has a story, and every story holds a belief, and if you had the chance to encounter it, will you pass on that opportunity? Maybe this would interest you. Perhaps you have heard about Carmel’s tale of the Lavender Lovers?

Pairing: AHS! Michael Langdon x Reader

Genre: romance, angst

Warnings: trigger warning for depression and suicide, underage drinking

Note: I needed a story in which Michael isn’t seen as an anti-christ and just a normal human being for once. I wrote this story based on Joji’s Slow Dancing in The Dark because it was so hauntingly beautiful and heartbreaking at the same time. Also, it is influenced by Are You Afraid of The Dark’s tale of the Prom Queen in some ways. I had this overwhelming burst of sadness this weekend because of the song that when I watched the music video for it, I keep seeing him as Michael in a white suit, lol. I have to say, it’s not one of the best I’ve written and the story sounded better in my head than it is with words. I hope you all like it, feedback is welcomed, thank you :) Go listen to Joji now! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YPMVR3gJBLY

Word Count: 5307 words

February 29, 1956.

It may seem like a typical day, but not for the seniors of Carmel High School. It was the most important night of their lives, one filled with great enjoyment and lasting memories they could reminisce on when they grow older.

Prom Night.

A significant event that happens once in every girl’s life. One day where they can show off their elegance and beauty while still in the early years of their prime. Battering up their faces with makeup, spotting a new hairdo in trend and not forgetting about the expensive prom dresses.

A turquoise 56’ Bel Air Chevy convertible drives up to the driveway and parked into place. A young man emerges out from the car, spotting a white suit with a black bow tie around his neck. His golden hair was slicked back with layers of gel to keep it looking fresh and perfect, with tiny strands of soft curls just ending by the tip of his cervical. In his hands, was a soft lavender corsage laying neatly in its box.

He starts walking up the pathway leading towards the front door. Once he reaches the porch, he takes in a deep breath and exhales it out, chanting positive words in his mind to boost up his confidence. Rapping his knuckles against the door, he straightens himself out for the last time.

He could hear footsteps coming from behind the door. A beautiful woman appears behind it, smiling at him, causing the corner of her eyes and mouth to form wrinkles. She welcomes him to come inside, greeting him with a loving hug and tells him to wait at the foyer before calling out the name of her daughter, his lover.

Standing at the top of the stairs, was a young woman. Dressed in a long sleeveless hemline sweep cut fairy dress with a sweetheart neckline. The dress was made from silk, satin, decorated with small soft pearls beaded along the neckline and a sheer layer of fabric to top it off from the waist down. The colour of the dress was a paler tone of lavender than the corsage he was holding.

She was simply breath taking.

The very sight of her made the young man’s heart tingled in excitement and his eyes twinkled in delight. He had the widest grin on his face, almost as to say, “I can’t believe she’s mine.”.

The woman gracefully took small steps as she begins descending the stairs, almost floating even. She had tugged the end of her dress higher to prevent her from falling. As she reaches the bottom, the man reaches out his hand as the woman slips her hand into his.

“You truly are an amazing beauty, Ms. L/N.” His compliment had caused the woman to blushed a rosy tint on her cheeks. After two years of courting, the littlest of compliment had never failed to make her feel so shy, causing the man to always tease her when he had the chance, much to the woman’s delight.

“And you look quite dashing yourself, Mr. Langdon.” He chuckled at her compliment making her laugh as well. He brings out his other hand from behind, showing the corsage that he had for her.

The moment she placed her eyes on it, her hand had fluttered to her chest, trying her best to calm herself. “My, my, Michael. That’s the most exquisite looking corsage I’ve ever seen. Where did you get this from?”

“I made this myself, actually. I wanted to make it more special. Lavender was the perfect colour to use, seeing as the flower is in full bloom now. Not only that, it holds so much meaning for a flower. It represents refinement, elegance and grace and they are often considered the most delicate and precious due to their sacred place in nature, just like you. A flower like you comes once in a lifetime.” As soon as those words escaped from his mouth, tears had started trickling down the woman’s cheeks.

The man hurriedly wipes the tears away with the softness of his thumb, careful not to smudge her make up. “Stop crying, you’re going to ruin your make up, baby.”

The woman playfully nudges the man’s arm. “Well, it’s your fault for being such a sweet talker.”

The woman’s mother had gone off to grab her camera to get pictures of this special day. “Alright, hurry up you two. Get closer to each other. Oh my god, you both look so adorable!”

The man takes the corsage out of the box before slipping it on the woman’s wrist. The woman admired its beauty before being nagged by her mother to snap out of her daze.

Few clicks here and there, and the pair of lovers are off.

Like the gentlemen he is, the man opens the passenger door for his partner, before going around the driver’s side and slipping into his seat. The car’s roof was open so they could see the dark night sky with the stars scattered across it. It was as if someone had poke holes through a black canvas, with light emitting through it. If one could hear how the stars sound like, it would sound utterly sad and heart breaking, constantly awaiting their time before bursting out the last of its energy and fading out to die.

“How about a little music along the way?”

“Sure.” The man turns on the radio, turning the knobs trying to find a good station before landing on one, a pleasant melody starts to play, almost letting your body to sway to the music.

“They’re playing The Five Satins! I love this song. It sounds so romantic yet so haunting beautiful, don’t you think?” The woman chirps.

“I couldn’t agree more.” The man starts his engine and drives down the road, one hand steering the wheel and the other, wrapped around the woman’s shoulders, cuddling her closer to him.

The drive to the hotel where the Prom was held didn’t took long, a good twenty minutes at least. By the time the pair had arrive, the function hall was already packed with the seniors of Carmel High. They spotted familiar faces of their friends, drinking away the punch as if it was beer while some of them had already been dancing on the dance floor with their partners.

One by one, all their friends soon left them to dance, leaving the pair by the table. The music coming from the speakers was booming super loud with fun, fresh and funky retro music to dance along to. It continued on until the DJ starts to play something new, a slow song, one that could easily be recognised by the woman.

Taking it was a cue, the man stands up and stands in front of his partner. “Care to dance, my lady?”

She took his hand as the man twirls her around. “I thought you never ask.”

When they approached the dance floor, the woman places her arms around the man’s neck while he places his on her waist. Slowly they begin to sway to the melody of the music, eyes only looking at each other and no one else. Gently, the man places his forehead to rest against the woman’s, giving her his signature smile, one that she had adored since they first started dating.

“I wish we didn’t have to slow dance in the dark. They could at least get better lightning in here other than that disco light they keep recycling over the years.” The woman chuckled, surprising the man.

“It’s better that way, so that you couldn’t see me blush every now and then.”

“Does our close proximity making you feel shy, baby? We’ve been dating for two years now. I’m surprised you’re not used to this by now. I find it cute. You’re so cute.” His teasing only reddened the cheeks of the woman, and she was silently thankful he couldn’t see her face at that moment.

They partied all night long and danced till their legs gave way. They had so much fun, they didn’t bother to check the time. And did I mentioned the pair even won Prom King and Prom Queen? Even the captain of the cheerleading team and her quarterback boyfriend felt frustrated and baffled they didn’t win the title, considering how popular they were. Angered, the cheerleader left the hall screaming bloody murder with her boyfriend trailing behind her.

Once Prom ended, it was time to leave.

“Let’s go home, Michael. You could stay over and we will binge watch on those horror movies they air late at night.”

“Sure, but before we do, I want to show you something.” The man suggested.

“Okay? This better not be one your schemes of terrifying me to death again.” The woman warned. She had too many encounters of her boyfriend pranking her so much she’s amazed she was still breathing and alive.

“No, no more jokes. I promise.” Bringing up his hand, he held out his pinky for the woman to laced her pinky around his. “Good.”

“Where are you taking me? This route leads to Blackteeth Forest. It’s getting dark and there’s no light there. Are you sure you know where you’re going? We’re going to be back home late.” Her voice told the man that she was afraid, glancing at her he could see she looked worried.

“I know but that’s not where we’re heading. Besides, the night’s still young. I really want to show you this place. I’ve been wanting to for so long and only tonight is the night I can show it to you.”

“What’s so special about this place?” The woman wondered.

“All your questions will be answer in due time, baby.”

After a few more minutes of driving, they had reached the location. The woman looked up ahead to see a bridge towering over a lake. Once they reached to the middle part of the bridge, the man parks his convertible to the side.

The woman steps out looking at the scenery in awe despite the gloomy night. The only source of light came from the pale moon, shining brightly down on them.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” The man’s voice came from behind her. His arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her in closer as her back meets with his chest. He tucks his chin on her shoulder and rested his back on the side of the car.

“It is.” She turns her head to the side, faced with the man’s side profile. She smiles at him, leaning her head forward to give a kiss to his cheek. The man smiles in satisfaction, happy that he was able to make her smile. “I didn’t know this place existed and it looks so wonderful in the night time.”

“Do you know why I brought you here?”

“No, and I would like to have my questions answered now, please.” She pleads.

“Fine. This bridge here is called The Bridge of Mizpah. Mizpah in Hebrew means ‘watchtower’. It also means a deep emotional bond between people, especially those separated by distance or death. This bridge was built in 1919 to link the road from the city to the old St. Helena Cemetery right across.

They named the bridge Mizpah because people couldn’t reach the other side of the lake when they were heading for the cemetery. Before, they had to use canoes and boats to cross over. It got tedious to go back and forth so they decided to build a bridge over, almost as if a connection between the living and the dead.

After the 1930 rock avalanches, the government closed down this road because it was too dangerous since the road is close to the mountains. Now, everyone just uses the new road they built near Rottenhill Park. It’s faster to reach the cemetery and far away from danger.

The lake however, is another story. It looks calm and peaceful, in contrast to its name. Everyone just knows it as Lake Lacrimae but never the reason why. The name Lacrimae comes from Latin for ‘tears’. Before that, it was called, ‘Et Lacrimis Dolorem’. It is a mouthful, I know. It means the ‘tears of sorrow’.

The lake represents the tears the living had shed for the dead. The locals even said that it was Carmel’s version of The River Styx, but instead of hate, its sorrow. A lot of people didn’t dare to swim in this lake, too afraid the souls would drag them down and drown them.

Even if this place just seems utterly depressing, it holds the greatest sight of all. The Mångata. It is a Swedish word to describe the glimmering roadlike reflection the moon creates on the water. Although it’s not that fascinating to others, still, the sight of it just brings warmth to my heart. Only on February 29 will you get to experience this magical yet haunting moment.”

The man ends it off with a sigh, closing his eyes to enjoy the quiet moment of his surroundings.

“I never pegged you for being so mellow and sappy, Michael. You continue to surprise me every day, baby.” She chuckles, only to have the man tickle her sides as she begs him to stop.

“May I remind you who it was that had a crush on this mellow and sappy boy and asked him out on a date?” He stares her down, smirking at her now that she was face to face with him.

The woman crossed her arms, “Fine, you win. But at least I caught a cute one at it too.” She remarks cheekily. The man grabs both of her cheeks, pinching them both before placing a kiss on her pouty lips.

“Thank you. Shall we go now? It’s getting chilly.” The woman nodded.

Once they arrived at the woman’s driveway, she pulls her lover in for a long sweet kiss. “Thanks for today. I really had a great time.” She smiles, giving him another kiss.

The man caresses her side of the face, taking in her features for the last night. “Me too. Wash up and go to bed early, alright?” She rolled her eyes and bid him farewell. “Yes, hubby.”

Once he had heard those words, a grin appeared on his face. “I’ll be seeing you in my dreams, baby.” When he sees her entering her house, she looks back to smile at him and blows him a kiss. He catches it, using the hand and placing it on top of his heart. He waves her goodbye before driving off back to his home.

March 2, 1956.

Local teen found dead in her home on 28 Avalon Street on Thursday morning.

16-year-old Y/N L/N was murdered after being found unconscious in her bed with blood on her prom dress that she wore the day before.

She had been stabbed at least 18 times before succumbing to her wounds. Reports say the time of the incident took place between 11:30pm and 12:00am on February 29, after she was dropped off by her boyfriend after they returned from their Prom.

Her parents had come home late after visiting the hospital where Mrs. L/N’s brother is currently being warded for treatment. Mrs. L/N had found it suspicious when the back door of the house was opened ajar and her daughter, failing to respond to her after calling her out multiple times.

When she went to check on her daughter, she saw her lying in a pool of blood in her bed.

Police had identified the two suspects, Ms. Larnie Woodson and Mr. James McKinley, both students at Carmel High School, where L/N attended as well. Students who went to Prom on the night of February 29 had heard of Woodson’s plans to kill L/N after she was not crowned as Prom Queen.

Both suspects were arrested after police found evidence of the murder weapon in the hidden compartment of the boot of McKinley’s Porsche.  

When asked for comments about the situation, Mr. and Mrs. L/N remained silent. Carmel High School student council had set up a remembrance altar at the school for L/N to honour and remember her as the sweet, loving and caring young woman.

The trial for Woodson and McKinley will be heard on Monday, March 5.

The woman’s lover had heard of the news. At first, he couldn’t believe it. He didn’t want to believe it. Until the day of her funeral. The love of his live, in her coffin looking so lifeless and dull. Her once rosy cheeks were now colourless, and her skin was pale as ice. Her pink lips were now grey and cracked.

Yet, she managed to look like she was before, beautiful. She looked peaceful with her eyes closed. Almost as if she was just sleeping. A long and deep sleep. One she wouldn’t wake up from. As the coffin began to lower down into the hole, he looked at it for one last time before leaving the cemetery and drowning his sorrow with alcohol his father had kept in the fridge.

A month had passed and yet the man hadn’t moved on nor stop thinking about her. She was always on his mind, day and night. No one could ever move on, especially from a love so warm and endearing like theirs.

He needed that love, but was only left with the bitter coldness of the heartbreak and the dreadful guilt eating him away. He stopped going to school the week after her funeral. He gave his parents the reason everyone was trying to help him with the grief but it was only making it worse that it got depressing.

He didn’t like to go outside because there were too many places that reminded him of her. Too many memories that would only break him down and tear him apart. That uncomfortable feeling. He didn’t like that. He grew to hate it so much. He grew to hate her too.

She was haunting him until he couldn’t tell whether he was awake or dreaming. With every turn and every corner, she was there. Like a ghost, one minute she’s there, and another minute she’s gone. It only heightened his senses, putting him on constant alert, too afraid to run into her again.

It drove him mad, and completely insane till one day, he started hearing her call his name in his dreams.

Her voice sounded lonely as she calls out to him. Asking him to come see her because she misses him a lot and the place she was now was cold and dark. She tells him how much she loves him and wishes to be back with him. He did too, he longed for the day he could touch her again and be right by her side.

He kept apologising to her, telling her how much of a failure he is as a boyfriend and she would remind him how much love and happiness he had given her and how he should never look down on himself. She asked him to come visit her and he agreed to the following night.

Taking a last look in the mirror, the man straightens out his white suit and adjusting his bow tie, grabbing the bouquet of lavenders by his bedside before heading out of the front door.

When he bumped into his mother when she got back from her shift from work, she asked him why he was wearing his suit and going out at this late of hour.

He simply replied her he was going to see Y/N and that seeing her at night felt more intimate to be with the dead. He bids her goodbye and walks towards his convertible. As he turns on the radio, the familiar haunting tune starts to play, triggering back memories to the night of the Prom.

He drove his car to the place he had promised to meet her, the place where he knows she’ll be there, St. Helena Cemetery. Once he enters the black iron gates confining the dead from the outside, the air starts to grow chilly as the white fog thickens down the road.

As he reaches the block of her grave, he could see the back of a woman, dressed in the same prom dress as his lover did. When his headlights shone towards her, the woman turns around in his direction.

When she saw who it was, a ghost of a smile appeared on her lips, delighted to see the love of her life as her heart leaped with joy. Seeing her smile made the man’s broken heart start to heal, just a little, at the sight of her waiting for him.

He turns off his engine, grabbing the flower bouquet and approaches the woman, still in awe to see her standing right in front of him.

“You came, I was beginning to think you stood me up.” She gazes into his eyes, and the man almost got lost looking at hers. He could even see is silhouette forming in them despite the dark surroundings.

He laughed, “You? Never.”

He gives her the bouquet he had been meaning to give her. She takes it from him, looking at it admiringly, caressing it with her fingers. She places the bouquet down in front of her tombstone.

The woman’s hands slowly crept up to rest on his shoulders, pulling him in for a hug, a needed hug that had been prolonged for far too long.

“I miss your hugs so much. Everything feels cold now. There’s no more warmth. You have no idea how much I needed this.” She tells him.

“Me too. I really miss you a lot, Y/N. I really need you right now. Everything feels right whenever you’re around.” He admitted. “There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think of you.”

They stayed in each other’s embrace for a while before the woman broke the hug. She leans away, and places her hands on the sides of the man’s elbows. “You know, I always wanted to know what it feels like to slow dance in a cemetery. Care to dance, Mr. Langdon?”

“There’s no music. It’ll just be awkward to sway to no music.”

“Nonsense. But, I could help with that.” With a flick of her fingers, the radio of the car turns on. The same tune he had heard earlier on, lingering in the quiet of the night.

“You seem to enjoy that song a lot. It’s beginning to grow on me now.”

“Right? I know I picked a good song. I have good taste in music.” She stated boldly. “Whatever you say, my love.”

He shifts her arms to wrap around his neck and does the same with his, wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her in closer.

“I never thought I would be slow dancing in a cemetery with you.” He tells her.

“Me either. I thought you would have run away by now.” She chuckles.

She rests her head on the shoulder of the man, as he tucks her in the crook of his neck, placing his chin above her head.

Time seemed to have slowed down, and it felt as if they had been dancing for hours, circling and swaying to the song in an endless loop.

All of a sudden, faint bells chimed around them. The woman lets go of the man and looks down to the ground with a sad expression.

“I have to go now. My time’s up for the night. Thank you for seeing me, Michael. Goodbye.” She lets go of his hand, only for him to grip on it, as if she would fade away if he didn’t catch her in time.

“No, you can’t. You can’t leave me, not again. I can’t lose you anymore. I agreed to see you and now you’re leaving?! You can’t just leave me when you want to.” There was anger laced in his voice.

“It’s not like I have a choice. They allowed me to see you, but only for a short while. I can’t keep seeing you like this, not when we’re in different worlds now. I don’t belong in yours and you don’t belong in mine. There are boundaries that you should know, Michael.

We cannot be in each other’s life like we used to be. How long do you think this will last? It will only worsen your mentality and health, Michael. I can’t bear to see you like that. To hang on to me like this. It’s not right. I cannot be with you anymore.” The woman sounded heartbroken, of course she wanted to stay but she couldn’t. She knew if she continued on with this, the suffering will never end.

As much as it breaks her heart to say it to him, she knew it was the right thing to do. It would put him out of his grief and pain, letting him free from the burden that had been pulling him down. The man’s knees had given way, making him fall to the ground on his knees, the dirt rubbing against his white pants.

“Then, what can I do to make you take me back? I only want you here with me. I can’t function properly anymore. Everything doesn’t make sense. You know, its all your fault! If you didn’t keep popping up around me, calling my name, it would have been easier to move on from you. It’s your fault for making me like this. It’s your fault for being so selfish.” He snaps, anger flaring in his eyes as he looks at her as if she had betrayed him.

“Selfish?! You’re calling me selfish?! You’re the reason why I’m stuck like this! Why I can’t never seem to escape this place and cross over. It’s all because of you! You keep calling out my name when you sleep, constantly whimpering, begging me not to leave you, telling me to stay. I couldn’t cross over because of you. You are my unfinish business.

I only stayed because you didn’t let me go. You wouldn’t know how much I sacrificed for you. How I begged Him to let me comfort you. I let my presence be known to you so you know I didn’t leave you. This cannot go on forever, Michael. Sooner or later, you have to move on from me. So please, Michael. Let me go. Let me go, baby.” The woman kneels down so she was on the same level as the man.

“If I let you go, I’ll have no one. You are the person I see reflecting back at me in the mirror. You are the breeze that I feel whenever I need to forget about the world and let peace take over me. You are the pride that I hold on, knowing I had made you the happiest person in the world. You are the love that I needed the most and I’ll die without it.

You have no idea what it feels like knowing the love of your live had died before you, how difficult it was to go through all the emotions. Pain, grief, guilt, sorrow, remorse. So, imagine what it feels like to be in my shoes. I thought it would be bearable to seek the closure I need if I visit you. But it only proved me wrong.” He sobs, choking on his tears and letting them roll down his cheeks.

The man was engulfed in the woman’s embrace, her hands soothing his back as she kept apologising for leaving him too soon. She remembered the promise they had promised to each other. To grow old and die together, and it made her cry. Maybe it was no one’s fault. No one could have stopped the incident from happening nor did anyone saw it coming.

Maybe it was fate. Everyone has a limited time in the living before returning back to Him. Maybe it was Y/N’s time to go back to Him. Michael knows he couldn’t compete with him. No matter how much he begged her to stay, she can’t come back to him alive. He had to accept the fact. He had to let her go eventually.

He sighs before looking into her eyes, “Alright, I’ll do what you want me to, I’ll let you go. Asking you to stay would be selfish of me. But can you promise me this if I let you go? As much as it sounds selfish of me to ask of you?

The woman cups his face in her hands, “Of course, what is it baby?”

“Will you wait for me? So, we can be together again?” He pleaded to her, his voice almost sounding hopeful she would agree to him.

“I’ll wait for you no matter how long it takes. I’ll be there to welcome you back in my arms. I promise, Michael.” The man felt his heart swell with ease and comfort. “Thank you, Y/N. We’ll meet again in the same world, one day.”

He watches her silhouette fade away into the darkness before walking back towards his car. With one last look at her tombstone, a sad smile appeared on his face before driving off to the living.

March 26, 1956.

The body of a 16-year-old was found in Lake Lacrimae in Carmel Sunday morning.

Michael Langdon was last seen by his mother on Friday night when he went to visit his girlfriend’s grave, Y/N L/N at St. Helena Cemetery that was murdered last February.

Langdon’s mother filed for a missing person report when he did not come home the next morning. The police had sent a search and rescue team to look for Langdon near the area of St. Helena and Blackteeth Forest.

After two hours of searching, police found that the railing of The Bridge of Mizpah, at the old road near St. Helena, had been destroyed.

It took them several hours to pull the car out of the river.

They recovered the car Langdon was driving, a 56’ Bel Air Chevy on the bottom of the lake, with Langdon still trapped in between the crushed car.

Officers believed he had committed suicide by driving his car off the bridge. Reports have said that Langdon was suffering from post-traumatic stress and depression after the loss of his girlfriend.

When midnight strikes on February 29, do not be afraid if you hear the sound of engine running through your street in the middle of the night.

Do not be frighten if you hear the haunting melody of The Five Saint’s Still of The Night playing throughout your neighbourhood.

If you are brave enough to look out the window, you could see a young couple in a 56’ Bel Air Chevy cruising down the road and if you look closer, you would recognise them to be Y/N L/N and Michael Langdon, smiling to each other with Michael’s arms around Y/N.

When you visit St. Helena Cemetery at night, do not run away if you see a pair of lovers slow dancing under the pale moonlight.

When you visit their graves, make sure you leave them lavenders, and lavenders only. It is the symbol of their love and wishes for you to respect that if you visit them.

If you wish to seek everlasting love with your beloved, leave an offering of a lavender flower and a corsage on their tombstones. Ask them for their blessings and they will grand you your wish, provided that you do not disturb their moment of intimacy.

So, you see why young lovers venture to Carmel. The tale of the Lavender Lovers will only remain a mystery if you don’t experience it yourselves. A love that was once filled with despair and tragedy now a love as old as time.

Taglist: @hxdesworld, @champagnejoker, @buckynatlarry , @morningstarkit, @bitchierrichie, @meeeeeeeeeps,  @abblez-the-babblez, @snookabooforever, @frozenhuntress67

[chocolatemicenwhiskey]

Sidefic: Guys' Night

Side fic thing for the NBC Hannibal/Fear Clinic crackship I've been working on.

For @tranimation because I'm bored.

"You've barely touched your beer."

Villatoro snapped out of his thoughts, not realizing he'd been staring off into space.

"Maybe I feel like DD-ing tonight," he grumbled, hopefully back to his usual gruff demeanor.

Barney laughed, nudging Villatoro's shoulder.

"Riiight. How's Bea? Tried to get her to come along but she said no."

Villatoro felt a sudden surge of annoyance, as was typical when in present company. Damn shame Barney was the closest thing to a friend.

"She's fine."

He was never one for professionalism. If you'd told him six months ago that he'd go from Bedelia Du Maurier's personal bodyguard to her lover, he'd have laughed.

Barney, always knowing how to get under his friend's skin, smiled, sipping his beer before speaking.

"Job still good? How's the sex?"

"Job's fine. Sex is great. Hell, better than great..." Villatoro paused, realizing Barney had gotten him right where he wanted him. "Man, shut up."

"I knew it!" Barney exclaimed, his smile even wider as Villatoro slumped over the bar counter in defeat, resting his head on his arms. "I knew it! Don't be embarrassed, you lovesick idiot."

Villatoro suddenly shot up with a huff.

"Don't call me that!" he snarled, slamming down his payment on the counter.

"What, an idiot?" Barney asked with a chuckle.

"That too!"

"Ooooh, somebody doesn't like the L-word."

Villatoro growled as he stormed out of the bar, Barney following behind. Goddamn manic moron...

"C'mon, V, cut me some slack. I just wanna see my best friend happy."

"You must lead a very sad existence if you consider me your best friend, Barn."

"Nah," Barney replied, waving him off. "I'm the optimistic one and you're the brooding asshole who somehow snagged the Prom Queen. I get to be the best man, right?"

"G'night Barney."

"At least lemme help pick out the ring!"

"I'm gonna fucking stab you in your sleep."

[stvics]

i just saw stephanie 'stevie' byrd at clearview park. don’t you think they look like brie larson? anyway, she is a twenty-eight year old personal trainer/yoga instructor and she is still here because her original plan to become an olympic athlete fell through. they did graduate in 2007.

hello, i’m duckie (21, she/her) and i’m v excited for this!!! more info about my baby stevie under the cut. please HMU to plot or LIKE THIS and i’ll come to you!

tw: car accident, death, injury

ok so....back in high school stevie was your classic star athlete. she ran track and let me tell u....she was hella good. state champ, broke records, the whole deal. she had scholarships lined up college & had started training for the olympics when she was just a little youngin

she’s always been a smart kid, though. she bumped up a grade when she was younger. smart, athletic, cute, the whole package right?? except....she’s always been AWKWARD as HELL

so...she was kind of a hermit??? she didn’t have a really big social life because her parents and her coaches rly had her focused on training

she never went to parties. didn’t drink, didn’t do drugs, her whole life was track basically and even though she rly liked running she was??? p miserable. she just wanted a NORMAL life but everything was dedicated to track u know

senior year, her and some friends got into a severe car accident that ended her running career. two broken legs left stevie out of the track game and took away her scholarships and survivor’s guilt after the death of one of her friends kept her from getting back out there and trying again after she had healed

she almost had to take senior year off and start over again but she pushed through and graduated on time (early, technically) even though she missed prom bc she was in the hospital

she rly was down in the dumps after the accident and all. physio was HARD. she was angry and frustrated and wanted to give up but again....bein the determined soul she is, she pushed thru. even though she vowed to never run track again, she missed working out. she missed runners high and feeling the wind in her hair. 

even though her physio was hard, it felt GOOD when she finally started to get through it. it was such a relief to go back to being active again and doing what she loved most. yoga became a part of her physio as well and she fell in loveee

she tries her best to keep a positive mind and going to the gym and doing yoga rly help her clear her head of negative thoughts. it’s been her solace and....rly saved her life. 

she works as a personal trainer & opened her own yoga studio a few years ago 

after graduation and after coming out of her slump, she’s gotten less awkward and better at talking to people but she’s still....a little shy and very easily flustered lmaoooo. she likes her alone time, still isn’t really big on partying or drinking THAT much bc ya girl on a health kick, but she likes to dance and stuff so she’s still gna go out to the bar u know?

more or less just a chill gal. she’s got a semi-boppin fitness instagram & she gets really uncomfortable when people bring up her failed olympic dreams so pls don’t talk abt them LMAO.

she has a cat named sloth who she loves to death.

my bi queen!!!!!!

idk what else to say tbh!!!!

[xunicorngoddessx]

Love And Other Drugs 1.2

 I swear I was the Queen of no hangovers. That’s probably why my ass will drink until I can’t utter a word, just to see what I will feel like in the morning. Once I saw Asher walk in I just needed a drink and a drink fast. I was slamming them back so quick, I knew I would need a Commuter by the end of the night unless one of the watchdogs were around. As we got older they begin to disguise themselves.

“Oh, my heavens. Is that Asher?” Amia whispered in my ear and I side eyed her as she perked her tits up. Ever since she got them done, she’s been showing her ass more. I put my half-empty cup to my lips and mumbled

“It looks like it to me.” He snuck up behind his twin and she jumped excitedly to see her brother.  Everyone was so excited to see this man as if no one writes him or Skype him. He delivered hugs and then turned to me. His eyes swept me up and down.

“Josie.” The music was loud but I read his lips perfectly clear, and it caused an uncomfortable feeling if anyone else it would be pleasurable.

“Asher.” I put my face back into the cup, ”I’m going to get another bottle. Bailey, come with me.”  I swiftly walked past him

I managed to ignore his presence, even though I could feel him burning a hole through me as I threw shots back and danced with random’s. 

Just as I put the finishing touches to my painting, I heard the front door shut. I stepped back and admired my work. I straightened my area up and walked out into the kitchen, where I saw Bailey making breakfast and Amia slumped over the table.

“Rise and shine. I thought I said I wanted my cut at 9 am sharp and not a minute later.” I smirked and plopped down next to Amia who waved me away, Bailey chuckled and continued to cook, ” I’m just saying, I was a little smizzed but if I didn’t know any better I would think I was in a whore house. I swear if I hear you call Nafis Daddy one more time, I’m a go and question your mama.”

“Bitch ew. I was calling him Zaaadddyyy.” Bailey moaned. This bitch, “I’m sorry but Nafis just be slaying it and when he got the liquor in him, the shit be on another level.”

“Yea well in that case, yall need to take that to Nafis’s house. And yall just had to be in competition with this fucking feline.” I nodded to Amia

“Screw you. A girl's got needs, my kitty has to get petted every now and then.” She stuck her middle finger up at me.

“You sure he wasn’t strangling you?? You need to work on those purrs.”

“Says the heifer that, don’t know what it feels like.” I flipped her the bird, “Don’t get mad at me because you have pent up hormones.”

Okay, so it was true. I was working with this slim thick body. Hips, thighs, and ass, inherited from my mother and I was letting no one put their hands on me. Unlike, Amia who lost her V card at prom, I was holding out. Fear was the last thing I was worried about, I was worried about losing focus on getting to this money. Plus, nobody really struck my interest. I had a few slip-ups, but once I came to my senses I stopped that shit. Not giving my goods up showed so many true colors in these guys that I thought were really down for me. When they couldn’t get past go, they surely started to show less interest. I was all good with that though. I could stick to my goals and finger pop my damn self.

”...see Asher?” My mind fading back in when I heard Asher’s name. Bailey spun around and place our plates on the table. “He isn’t the same fresh into puberty boy we use to know. I mean, what do you kids say these days? The glow up was real.” Rolling my eyes at Amia, swearing she was always much older than everyone.

“Well, what did you expect? Him to stay 13 forever?” I put extra salt on my eggs, said a quick prayer and ate.

“I think I’m the only one that watched him grow. Puberty hit his ass good. Of course I never looked at him that way. He was always our best-friend.” Bailey stuffed toast into her mouth

“Bitch where? He wasn’t my best-friend, Aisha was. Anyway. I asked her to bring him to the shoot this evening.  So we could catch up on old times. I think I want to give him a shot.”

“A shot of what, Jack Daniels? You just hopped off one person and now you want Asher?” I stuffed my face so I could stop my angry rant. I swear my sister could be such a hoe.

“What? I mean I know he would like me. We grown now and I’m ready to complete my dare.”  She poured more orange juice and smiled, “Asher and Amia. That rings a bell.”

“Right.” I said , Bailey looked at me and if I didn’t know any better I would think we were twins, Her mind was completely saying that Amia was delusional as fuck.

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