#very excited abt this analysis

[sparring-spirals]

also, i mean, the entire situation is still devastating and all but im also very excited to see how the Bell's "We have a very loose grasp of social norms and range from giving unwanted therapy to strangers vs just Not Asking Questions about so much shit bc we dont judge" Hells are going to handle the aftermath of all this.

Like. They heard the aftermath, the screaming @ Delilah, etc, right. They're going to notice altered behaviour. We have the potential for such a RICH EXPANSE span of reactions!! From "so sympathetic it almost feels patronizing" to "something that invokes me going *oh my god You Cant Just SAY That*" to "extremely polite and sympathetic and minimal prodding" to "mildly rude but well intentioned" to "i dont care about the argument, what do you mean SLEEPING WITH THE EVIL ROCK-" to "Nothing Happened I Heard Nothing What Are YOU Talking About".

Boundless potential for hilarity. Like, still tragic, but very funny.

[angel-archivist]

m3gan is like the funniest movie of all time to be claimed by the queer community like hello???

[subarashiihibi]

my thing about izaya is that he's so strange and weird and i love that so much. i didn't want to ramble too much in the notes of that poor person's post but i find the way he speaks and the words he chooses so interesting so let me ramble a little bit. this may or may not even be coherent so bear with me here im just going to speak my thoughts.

ok this got really fucking long and all over the 0place so im putting this under a read more sorry.

so i have volume 9 of the novel in both english and japanese. i only have two novels in japanese and that is this one and yuuyake wo. so i'm pretty crazy about this izaya speech analysis shit. anyways i was rereading thru the jp ver the other day just to compare it to the eng and i kinda realized that like.

a lot of people you can separate their speech in either formal and informal speech right? someone like shizuo speaks really informally and uses a lot of rough, dragged-out versions of words and stuff (しゃーねえ vs しょうがない) and then someone like shinra who speaks in a ton of yojijukugo and generally sounds like a nerd emoji gijinka.

izaya on the other hand rly... doesn't fit in either? i mean sure he sounds like another nerd emoji gijinka but it's kinda different. it's not so much the words he speaks but rather the intonation and his tone...

and he has his moments where he speaks pretty seriously and whatnot of course, but in general he just... doesn't sound very human when he speaks? i don't know if that's a conscious effort or not. is it his attempts at distancing himself from his own individual humanity? or is it just because he's a weird guy? i dunno. but it's interesting nonetheless.

one thing i will note though is that despite his somewhat inhuman speech patterns, it's also pretty...dramatic? to the extent where it's really exaggerated but also very cute and charming. (this part is important.)

i think a lot of what makes izaya's speech so weirdly inhuman is because he doesn't really use a lot of slang or similar lingo that people his age would typically use. i know mikado said in the novels that he doesn't really try to fit in with his age group's fashion sense either so it makes sense but still. he's like an old hag it's so funny. and it's because of that that when he says stuff like 'i don't get all hot and heavy over headless women' or whatever he said to celty it's really amusing to me because like... why is the strange man saying this?💀

another example i kinda giggled about on my twitter when i read it it's not even crazy and i sound corny and cheesy and stupid but theres this scene in vol 9 where izaya messages celty for business and hold on let me just put it as a quote.

he sounds so old saying 'video game' like 😭 idk it's just funny cause he barely even knows anything abt games like bro knows nothing im crying

in the jp hes like 「…ゲーム中なのかい？」 and then when celty tries to explain herself he says 「何を言ってるのか、良く解らないんだけど」 and im rly bad at tling parts of sentences and stuff but just know that the way he words it makes it sound like this gif to me

i love both versions i think the original jp makes him sound like hes so lost and confused (hence why pw gif cause lord that man always looks lost LMFAOOOO) and then eng tl just blunt ass "I don't know what you're talking about." makes him sound like full on hag 😭😭😭

OMFG WAIT I HAVE TO MENTION THIS FUCKING SCENE WITH SHINRA ITS SO FUNNY.

first i think it's funny the translation has izaya say fuck here cause he very rarely swears and i did read this one thing about how he only swears when his mask slips so to me this is like genuine bewilderment that he cant even hide LOL. second why is he so excited to hear about 'whatever sexual fetish' shinra has im crying he's so damn nosy . okay but this is not the funniest part let me add that now.

???

ehy the hell is izaya orihara talking about foot fetishes???😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 im crying bruh i was so flabbergasted when i read this i was like WHAT did he just say? he says it in the jp ver too which just makes it even funnier. this goes back to what i said earlier but i always get so amused when izaya has something to say about sex or whatever cause he's so fucking weird and unsettling why does he know that

(i mean i also get so hard i nearly pass out thinking about izaya tlaking about sex but thats probably just a thing with my heart condition and stuff)

oh also another scene i think is really cute and amusing and funny is back when shinra was first still trying to get izaya to form the bio club w him.

1. shinra is funny as fuck in this scene but also izaya's "Hmm. Can I punch you?" made me havbe a good laugh. in the jp he says 「んー。殴ってもいいのかな？」 which is pretty much the same thing just with the intonation of like 'hmmmmmmmmm should i hit u or not...' sorry like i said im just bad w explaining this stuff. but i felt the need to point it out not cause im one of those annoying ppl who praise the original jp ver and reject translations and localizations i just think it's important for izaya specifically cause i love him and i want to analyze his speech patterns as best as i can.

i was going thru the novel just now for other stuff i wanted to mention and i forgot abt this part but it's so funny.

'Let's not get hasty. Type calmly, please.' its not even funny or nothing i just find it so amusinf whenever he talks like that💀 i will say though the english translation kind of makes him sound more weird and inhuman than the original. that line in the original was basically just him telling her she needs to calm down enough to at least type properly LOL. idk if im just being nitpicky cause this is izaya tho so feel free to ignore that. fwiw i like the eng tl bc while it's a different intonation than the original japanese ver i think if he did speak english it would probably sound smth like that anyways.

this too made me laugh like ??? seriously he is really nosy when it comes to people's intimate affairs. in the jp ver he calls them an 'intimate couple' which just is like .. ok bro💀

does anyone else see my vision of izaya getting cucked by celty (does it count as cucking when celtys the one dating shinra) while he looks sad and pathetic and miserable that he never decided to shoot his shot w shinra back in the day

if i were commenting on the actual stuff going on in this scene rn this post would be a lot olonger and even more terribly all over the place so im just gonna focus on how i think it's funny izaya says 'easy, man...' this is like one of the only times his words are somewhat natural and sound like smth you would hear someone else say. in the jp ver it's 「おいおい…」 which is somewhat less out of left field in terms of coming from izaya but still it's pretty surprisingly normal. i have to wonder if in that moment he's too worried about shinra to care about keeping up appearances.

this is just random and me making fun of izaya as usual but why the hell does he weigh himself after his showers💀💀💀 it's cute and endearing and only adds to his strong gap moe but still... it's strange...

speaking of cute things this is from a volume i forget but he says this one phrase a couple of times and it is just both really cute and also kind of idk... saddening. one of the times i can remember he says it is when namie was making fun of him or something and he replies 'Don't tease me. I'm only human.' or something along those lines and it's like . hm. ok.

i think it's cute he says 'dont tease me' a few times cause eughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (trying to ward off severe brain damaged incoherent thoughts) but 'im only human' is like... are you really? even after you try so hard to escape your own humanity and individual self so much... im going to try and give my thoughts on it here but this is just based off my hc that izaya has bpd so yanno. im basing a lot oif this on my own experiences sorry. i do that a lot. (gestures over to all the posts i make abt fob/mychem fan izaya)

when it comes to just straight up acknowledging his humanity izaya has no problems with this because 'sure, i'm human. isn't that obvious?' is probably something along the lines of what he thinks. it's easy for him to just say that because it's just that. it's just words. it holds no real meaning and shows no true insight into how he actually perceives himself. but when it comes to actually having to come face to face with his own humanity and the fact that yes, he is only human, it's a lot more difficult because now it's out of his control. i wonder also if he has problems with perceiving his own self.

i say this a lot but i truly do believe izaya is so so so beautiful and i love him so much. also i just saw a funny post on twitter so i wanna say this here idk if yall know this but izayas actually a latina hes got chismosavirus❤ ok thats all i have to say sorry for rambling so much

[wendytestabrat]

why kyle HATES seeing cartman sad

i feel like the reason why kyle can’t stand it when cartman is sad and down in the dumps is pretty much for similar reasons why he gets annoyed when stan is depressed. as i was saying before in a previous analysis kyle is a bitchass gemini so he doesn’t like having to deal with people’s emotions and prefers to stay upbeat & positive to avoid that shit, which is WHY he likes cartman more than stan bc cartman is normally way more positive and knows how to have fun and detach from emotions. so yeah the fact that he gets upset when cartman is sad and wants cartman to go back to his positive upbeat self says A LOT. what that tells me is all the shit he acts like he finds annoying abt cartman is what he actually loves. cartman has a VERY outgoing and boisterous personality and is constantly doing shit for attention 24/7 so he likes cartman for this and enjoys his rizz LOL. which is also why in “stunning & brave” when cartman decided he was gonna start following the rules and listen to PC principal kyle didn’t like that and wanted him to go back to being the rule breaking badass he is (even tho he acts like he hates cartman for being bad and getting in trouble) he secretly appreciates cartman for all these things, he likes that cartman always comes up with the most fun & crazy ideas in the group, he likes that cartman can be manipulative af and help the group achieve anything, and he overall loves cartman’s energy and light bc it brings positivity and excitement into his life.

[intertexts]

OK OK WORM UPDATE. I JUST GOT THRU INTERLUDE 1. ohhhh my god the shit about Scion????? horrifying. fills me with such immense dread. i don't know if its SUPPOSED to be like that but knowing vaguely how this story gets i immediately saw "man with golden skin appearing floating naked above water healing people who touch him and stopping disasrers and generally being seen as a GOD" and my first thought was ohhhh no oh fuck . i LOVE that shit. i hope scion is like. relevant enough to come up again and not just some vague historical figure bc ohhh my god i love that kind of worldbuilding. yeah man! if this guy showed up one day with no warning and was THE FIRST person with superpowers ever??? people WOULD go nuts and trear him like a deity!!!

anyway i also liked seeing from taylors dads pov. not much 2 say abt him yet i just thought it was neat :]

and i am VERY sus on the whole "so who gets credit for this" thing that armsman(?) brought up. hmmmmm

ohh this is such a fascinating first impression to me..... putting u under the microscope <3333. ALSO. saying this early iiii... probably am not going to speak on a lot of yr analysis other than vaguely giggling and saying ominous things (burdened by terrible knowledge) but!!! believe me im SO excited 2 hear it <333 anyway yeah im a HUGE fan of the way worm deals w/ the "how and when did superpowers become a thing? how did that affect the world?" questions..

taylors dad!!!! danny hebert.... man. also!!!!! what r yr taylor thoughts so fsr!!!!?? eyes emoji eyes emoji

[ultraviolet-cello]

Day 8 of the tristamp analysis marathon and jesus christ i am!!! really excited to do these now because people have been adding onto/being nice abt my stuff and that's super cool. Thank you again to @tristampparty for running this! I didn't manage to join in on the book club last year so it's nice to have a fun little event all the same

[But as for next book club,,,, well. I'm extremely transgender about trimax and would love to join in]

As always, spoilers for trigun stampede and trigun maximum! Also some CWs for Vash-typical passive suicidal tendencies and discussion of his psyche

So! Episode 8! I have.... mixed feelings, on how Tristamp portrays Knives. On one hand, I definitely think that we're being lead to believe that Vash has always been a peace-loving kid and that Knives has always had those tendencies, which would set up for season 2 to break that down. I hope.

The one thing I couldn't figure out, ofc, is the Knives not needing to eat thing - My friend millions-dykes theorized a black hole/white star dynamic a little while ago [as seen in the screenshot. I'm Organ, they are Nagito Malmonella]

aaaaaaaaanyway, we still get these little instances of knives just being a kid, and it's the funniest thing in the world to me. Vash is also apparently in tune with him enough to pick up on that and it's such twin behaviour.

There's also just a lot of cases of Knives smiling or being giggly around Rem, which,,,, he's such a mama's boy like we know this but it's so nice to have it reinforced. This theory of Knives having always been cold/standoffish just doesn't track - the only time he usually seems uncomfortable is when Rem touches him or when he talks about Plant stuff - particularly when he's talking about being different to Vash. Knives, to me at least, is a tad autism-coded :]

OKAY TO THE SCENE[TM]

So obviously this has changed from when we first saw Vash tell the story. Vash's sequence of events runs as follows:

Vash walks up to the little hill that Knives is laughing maniacally on top of -> Knives says "I finally did it! It worked! -> Vash confronts him with "How could you do that?" -> Knives reassures him with "Don't worry, I left the Plant ship" -> Knives says "I even got Rem killed!" -> Knives points out that Vash is his accomplice, but does not elaborate why. "Don't get mad. You're already my accomplice, isn't that right Vash?"

Now the sequence of events in this version is provably more accurate (the same audio is used in the black box recording discovered later), and goes as follows:

Vash wakes up from the escape pod and goes "Nai, where are you?" -> He spends some time following Knives' footsteps where he sees the crashed pods and fire and Knives laughing on the hill -> Knives says "I finally did it! It worked!" -> Vash says "I can't believe you killed Rem!" -> Knives says "Don't get mad. You're already my accomplice, it was you who told me the passcode - Am I right, Vash?"

So there are several inconsistencies in these two versions of events, most notably for me is that Vash is the one to bring up Rem. If the 1st telling was correct, it would imply that Knives wanted to kill Rem, but that part is conspicuously absent, because Vash is the one that brings her up.

Vash's retelling also omits the fact that he was the one to give Knives the passcode, shifting more blame onto Knives. It's very very interesting to me. Finally, Knives mostly has his back to Vash when he dissolves into laughter again. Which is a technique often used to hide if you've been crying or are having a hard time keeping some emotional responses down.

And I'm not even done with this flashback! The scene where Vash just lies down and wants to give up is,,, Well, in Trimax, ever since Tesla, Vash has struggled with suicidal ideation - he's the one that asks for Rem to just kill him, and that's heartbreaking, but we also see a bit of that leaking through here again, where he just wants to lie down and give up. It also gives me hope we're gonna see that Tesla aftermath scene in the next season, because that'll be breaking Vash down into his more complicated, messy parts.

Okay so I do think that the subtitles Aniwave uses are... a little bit Wack, I'm pretty sure that they're unofficial and probably a bit wonky, and I'm only slightly conversational in Japanese so I have 0 idea about this, but hey I think someone should inform Wolfwood, for no particular reas- [I am dragged away by security]

[I did check the dub, which referred to Plants giving birth which I think is much more likely to be accurate. But it'd still be funny for Wolfwood to have to sit through Plant sex ed so neither of them get pregnant]

Rem really was very, very young,,,,,

There are four photos here, but only one is given to Vash. I wonder why,,,, Possibly to gauge his recognition of Knives being in the photo, or keeping the other three to learn what they can about Knives.

The night/day progression cycle here doesn't really match up with Vash's little tally, so I don't think it's counting days. Given that he apparently went to say hello to everyone in cold sleep while on the ship, I think it's a little more likely that the tally marks are for them....

Do we ever actually get to hear Rem say the blank ticket thing in a flashback? I don't recall it, but it is said to Vash after the whole Stabbing Incident in Trimax, so that's possibly why they've kept it from us.

Theeee markings under this Plant's eyes match Elendira's, which. Obviously Elendira in tristamp is part plant there's just so many little details that lend themselves to it,,,

The HAIR COLOUR CHANGE AAAA

I like the little wall of Vash baby pics in the background here, but he still didn't get any of his 3 other ship pics back :(

Finally, Vash's line of "an Independent will make up for what an Independent has done" is interesting because his guilt complex really does spiral, huh. The reason Knives telling him "Oh, you just feel guilty for the Big Fall, huh?" in a later ep fucks him up so much is because like. That is kinda true to an extent. Vash is his own kind of self-deluding, but that only really starts spiraling at about this point in time.

Alright, setting up for a Day of analysis tomorrow, because I have many thoughts and feelings surrounding Knives (I love him very dearly and I hate him a lot (affectionate)) and we Will spend some time talking about Trimax Flavour Knives because my understanding of him is fundamental to my understanding of Tristamp Flavour Knives.

Thank y'all for the fun comments and theory addons!!! I'm having a lot of fun and we're really getting into how [normal] I am about Trigun!

[toytle]

Hi! I love your art style it's like. Breathtaking. And your hcs on barry are some of my favourites of all time?

What do you think of "The Ballad of Barry Allen by Jim's Big Ego as an analysis of Barry's character?

are you asking or are you telling me 🤨 lol THANK YOU i put all my headcanon power into him <3

for the ballad, i love their song stress, and this isn’t bad at all as far as fansongs go. but there’s a reason i don’t include it in my barry playlist, and it’s ultimately bc it doesn’t fit my narrative haha

the song was made in 2003 and i haven’t read many comics before then, so idk how well it aligns w barry’s characterization prior to flashpoint, but i’m basing my playlist off post-flashpoint, so that’s where a lot of the differences will lie

for starters, the song only includes one half of barry’s relationship to his superspeed, and it’s important to me that a barry interpretation includes both sides of that coin. instead, it’s playing on the idea of the dark side of the hero fantasy, an inherently optimistic genre. which, fair, being a superhero sounds like a nightmare, but that angle is less novel to me when that’s the extent of the analysis (and i’m a little over the whole “i hate being a superhero” storyline in general, personally). the song is basically abt how much it would suck to have superspeed bc the world slows to a crawl and you’re left behind bc no one else can keep up w you. and it’s true, that is a very real setback! especially for someone like barry who’s already prone to self-isolation and time management issues! but what does the song actually have to say abt him as a character?

the thing is, barry isn’t a “i wish i wasn’t a hero” kind of guy. he’s a “could i be so strong [to give up the flash]? or do i love the thrill of these powers too much?” kind of guy. he’s a “knowing what i know now… if i could go back in time… maybe i would’ve been somewhere else the day lightning struck my lab and electrified those chemicals, ready and willing to forfeit a life of dodging deathtraps and battling villains… who am i kidding? there’s no going back. no do-overs. like everyone else, superheroes can only follow the path destiny has laid out for them, whatever lies ahead.” kind of guy. yes, barry is caged by his superspeed, but it would be misleading to not present it first and foremost as the very thing that frees him. it’s a double-edged sword that gives him purpose, and that freedom in obligation is what motivates him to keep going. as a wise man once said, “all you can do is go forward.” (“thanks.” “superman is pretty smart isn’t he.” “hm.”)

i think the real kicker for me was this lyric: “i’ve got time to think about the past… how my life was so exciting before i got this way.” my sincerest apologies to mr. allen, but he does not feel complete to me without his mother’s death or his father’s false imprisonment. this backstory contextualizes everything for me. his life was NOT exciting before his superspeed, it was lonely and full of escapism, either in his sci-fi/comics or his dedication to finding justice. i am of the belief that barry didn’t truly start living until he got his superspeed, over 2 decades of waiting around before he rly understood freedom and what it meant to live for himself. i get what they’re trying to do here, but this is what i mean when i say it feels like the song characterizes barry around the concept of his speed rather than how barry’s speed defines him as a person

ik i can’t expect a 4min song to include every aspect of a character’s timeline/development/nuance (esp before some of that even existed lol), but my issue isn’t that it doesn’t cover enough ground—it’s not bad that they had a theme and stuck by it, i actually love the lyrics from a speedster perspective. my issue is that i don’t think this is a good framing for barry’s character as a whole. for all his regrets and suffering, barry is optimistic to the point of denial. choosing this to be The theme to represent barry just. doesn’t feel like barry to me. it’s more like barry is the placeholder subject as an excuse to sing abt superspeed

if this was somehow less overtly a “BARRY ALLEN FANSONG” and maybe more metaphorical or even non-fandom, then it would be a dif situation and i might have dif opinions. at the end of the day, this has more to do w my pickiness than the quality of the song, and the fact that it even exists is so exciting for me as a barry allen enjoyer first, human second. but if you’re going to call smth a character study, i Will be getting my hopes up

[dappersautismcreature]

here, maybe. a small masterpost abt this furniture/caging bad thing.

this IS imprisonment without trial, without justice. bad was entirely willing to talk this out with people, it wasn't like he was running. even when things were turned against him in early conversation he did not run. there was no point to caging him asides from some idiotic idea of cop vs robber that people had about this situation. they didnt have any evidence, even richas' testimony isnt strong evidence. theyve had evidence of further damning things on other people and have never resorted to this.

and thats another point. nobody besides the federation has ever trapped or hurt another islander like this. you HAVE to admit this is a crossing of a line not previously crossed.

im not calling anyone in this situation 100% in the wrong, 100% the villain, or 100% the thief. and neither should literally ANYONE when doing character analysis in this. until we have concrete undeniable proof of action without remorse, i will not condemn any of these characters to posts about 'how evil they are for doing such and such'. i expect you to agree, if you dont, i do not understand you.

cc!bad could still be pulling a fast one on all of us, i agree. in fact im still not calling for his innocence. but i will admit there are many factors to this that are in favor of him. i think i can say i know q!bad, and how cc!bad plays him, preeeetty well? of course im no egotistical idiot, i can be wrong, but so could anyone at this point -___-

it is very odd to see q!cellbit acting like this, and i know many things point to his time as f!cell having an impact on his actions now. so i would like yall to also consider that cellbit may be biased and not completely in his right mind right now. i think that is an intentional character choice on the cc!s behalf.

most of this is intentional, thought out roleplay. do not harass any ccs in this, keep harsh venting against characters to their proper neg tags and mostly in private. and id also like to say, especially to white americans, look at your posts through a lense of anti-racism, anti-xenophobia, and a sense of worldwide politics and democracy vs just american politics and democracy. i myself have had to examine my posts and actions and learn new things. it is better to correct your internal xenophobia and misunderstandings in the draft phase, learn from it, and move on, rather than doubling down. listen to hurt brazilians about this PLEASE. we do not want tumblr to become a twitter cesspool.

overall, very excited. i was feeling down after yesterdays arguements with seemingly no ends but now that actions have finally been made i am so excited. qsmp truly is about to enter a new era and i am inspired! revolution time babyyy!

[draconisvesperi]

i wish smone who actually knew this stuff would do an analysis of Neuvillette's theme in the trailer. it's obviously very grand and powerful but i can't help but get an immense feeling of conflict, or sadness, or some great internal lament of sorts, from it. i dont know anything abt music so idk what it is, but it is sad and agony and conflict in some way merged with this indomitable might and idk what to make of it

also i am really excited for his character as a whole i have lots of Thoughts, ic ant wait for more lore to be revealed.

[fatalitysficbakery]

hey bae, idrk how to request stuff its been a long time since i have !

but i was wondering if i could request an elle greenaway x reader where they supposedly ‘hate’ each other at work but theyre actually dating and they act like that to avoid suspicion and elle gets caught in a like shooter thing and then she gets back safely (based on that b99 episode w rosa)

or if thats too detailed idk,, just the last bit, ‘elle gets caught in a like shooter thing and then she gets back safely (based on that b99 episode w rosa’

idk if this makes sense i wqs daydreaming abt it in the car earlier and i am so sleep deprived rn idek if im making words right

so sorry for how long this is i love the elle fic u posted 07.10 !! im sleel now im fallimg aslepp

𓆰♡︎𓆪 What Goes On In The Dark. —

Elle Greenaway x Black Fem!Y/n

genre: angst/fluff.

warnings: hostage situation, mentions of violence, blood, and shot wounds. JJ is a profiler here. Liaison!Y/n, grief, mentions of suicide, gun violence, nothing too graphic.

synopsis: i’ll love you till the very end, amor.

a/n: i hope you enjoy my take on this request, lovely!

↳ 𓆰 Fatalitysficbakery navigation menu 𓆪

↳ 𓆰 Fatalitysficbakery criminal minds menu 𓆪.

↳ ❝Don’t let last words be ones to regret.❞⁣ -Unknown

⌫

Quantico, The Behavioral Analysis Unit was always my goal from the very start, I'd walked into the double doors of the place on my first day bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, all the whilst every horror imaginable lay beneath.

There was a lot to dislike about the place, the bureaucracy the most damning flaw of all, It was a tangled mess that the agents had to deal with, to remember why you're there was to do your job well.

Elle Greenaway and I were alike in that way, we wanted to help the world be a safer place, I remember our first meeting, she'd welcomed me to hell. Her piercing brown eyes stared me down, scanning me as if she could see right through to my soul.

The blush that kissed my skin that day was embarrassing and exciting all at once. She'd find ways to talk to me, excuses to come to my office. The new liaison. I'd let the team know my doors were open at any point in time, and God did she ever abuse it. Suddenly pencils regularly disappeared from her desk. Could she use one of mine? Did I have a stapler? Hers was empty.

It was...flattering.

I couldn't lie, the agent had piqued my interest from the start. A smooth talker with a quick tongue. Clever. Amazing at her job. Just my type, you could consider me charmed from day one. She had me in the palm of her hand.

From there it was inevitable, I was hers.

Again, the ladder of the BAU was a tough one to work around, the night we finally hooked up, it was under the guise of me not having a ride home from work. My car was in the shop...The same one that was parked just in the garage parking lot, furthest space away from the other's eyes.

That night, staring into puddles of hazel brown, brunette locks tickling my skin; I knew I'd developed an addiction, and god was it a euphoric one.

↳

When we made it official, Elle gave me a locket, heart pendant with a picture of us in it. We'd agreed to keep it on the down low until we knew how to break it to Strauss and the rest.

That's when Operation: Become The Enemy started. Pretend to be absolutely revolted by one another at work, disappear into our own little world when alone.

It was a riot trying to pretend I hated the woman, hell, she drove me insane in all the best ways. She was my drug.

God, was she ever.

Being snapped back to reality tends to ruin all fantasies.

𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪

The BAU was my dream. My goal from the start. I wanted to be here, I wanted to be here.

My chest felt tight, my every limb aching the moment Hotch cleared it. Allowed her to go inside. Why did it have to her? Why did she have to be the hero?

It's our job, I know. I repeated that to myself so many fucking times whilst watching her put on that damned bulletproof vest which did nothing to silence my worries. — Every other part of her became fair game.

My chest hurt, my breathing sped up. Everything blurred. Before long I was being escorted to my seat by a worried JJ, I couldn't even tell her the reason I was so upset. I felt myself drowning, sorrow encapsulated my entire being, paralyzing me with a fear I'd never felt in forever.

The fear of loss. Grief.

I couldn't believe it, the world was taking from me what happiness I had gotten back, and to make it all worse...

She'd probably thought I hated her.

POP. POP. POP.

"Was that a gunshot?! We're going in. NOW"!

It was at that moment, my sorrow melded into anger and determination. Hotch and Rossi, I could see a moment of doubt on their faces, but there was none in mine. I nodded at them, jaw set.

I could see relief wash over Aaron, I could hear Jennifer exhale.

I got geared up, muttering a quiet.

"We're going to get Elle".

⌫

12 hours ago.

I could feel her icy glare on me, but I couldn't look her way. I wouldn't. I was too prideful. Too stubborn. Too...hurt.

It all seems so stupid now in hindsight but then, then it felt so serious. End of the world serious.

She was still worried of exposing our relationship and what that would mean, fearful. I could see it in her eyes that she didn't wanna risk the chance of losing what we had, but I was tired. Too tired to look at it from a different perspective, to be rational. I wanted the world to know.

It'd been an almost full year of Elle and Y/n. Didn't that mean something to her?

Now that I think about it; It probably meant everything to her, and that's where her hesitance stemmed from. Maybe if I hadn't been so boneheaded...

↳

Elle walked into your office that day, two cups of coffee in hand and a to-go bag under her chin. It was early before most of the team had even arrived. She wanted to get there before it was time for another award-winning performance of pretending to hate the woman she loved the most.

The smile that greeted you was one of pure happiness, and it had only been met with a grimace of discomfort, and a problem waiting to be made. I mean, how dare she? Bring you coffee and scones while you prepped to present another harrowing case to the team with Garcia? How absolutely dare she?

When she saw the grimace on your face after sitting the coffee and scones down, her smile faded almost immediately. Knowing instantly what this would be about, the same conversation had been going on for a week and a half now that your one-year anniversary was quickly approaching.

"It's a little early, no? You usually don't come in so soon".

That was a lie, you both knew it but Elle also knew that was only the gateway to your next question. She sits before you, pulling up a chair.

"Y/n, pleas—"

"I don't wanna do it anymore, Elle. Can't we tell Strauss and them? Our anniversary is two weeks away, we've been going behind their backs for too long...I want them to know".

Elle sighs, you'd asked this so many times and the answer stayed the same. Her lips part to speak but it's stuck in her throat, it's dying there and in her silence you find disappointments. Your mouth fixes into a slight scowl.

"Well"?

Elle finally speaks, "You know why we can’t".

Her answer again left you dissatisfied, but this time instead of fighting it, you allow words you regret to slip through the cloud of emotions you were feeling. Before you know it, it's too late to take them back, Elle's face had already fallen, and your ego was too big to take it all back.

"Fine. Well, maybe we shouldn't even be doing this. I'm tired of being just two coworkers hooking up".

The words hang in the air, toxic and venomous. The fumes left a nasty stench. Elle notices you pull your bottom lip between your teeth as you often do when uncomfortable or nervous. Yet you speak not a word.

She stands, clearing her throat.

"Just two coworkers hooking up? That's what you think of our relationship? Wow".

And that, that was all she said. There was so much and nothing left to say, neither of you quite processed what had happened before she left your office on that sullen note.

𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪

The case had gone from a simple familial kidnapping to not only the dad holding his daughter hostage but an entire library. My Elle had gone inside that place, her bravery had always inspired me, but today I couldn't help but have a strong disdain for it. The way she was immediately ready to go. It was her nature. It was MY nature. The entirety of the BAU would've done the same, and all I could think was why it had to be here.

When we got in, it was already too late. James had shot Elle in the thigh, and his daughter in the arm, before he'd turned the gun on himself.

I'd rushed to her side, the first one there whilst the rest tended to the others. She was already grey, lips pale and blue and eyes barely opened.

From that moment, leaving her side wasn't an option, the only time I did so was when she was rolled away for surgery. The hours spent with her gone was just me sobbing uncontrollably in Penelope's arms.

I was no longer able to pretend, and I was hoping, praying to whatever God I could that she'd make it out of that surgery alive to be mad at me about that.

I could hear her voice telling me to pull myself together, I was being too obvious. I could see her soft smile vividly in my mind winking at me right after that.

It was touch and go, touch and go.

Finally, the doctor came to talk to us.

𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪

I put the finishing touches on it, my heartbeat so loud I could hear it pumping. God, I was so nervous. I'd never done something like this before, I never thought I could be doing something like this before.

I'd rejected the idea of commitment, shunned it. The thought of long-term relationships terrified me. Maybe, maybe that was why it was so difficult to convince me.

I'd convinced myself it was because I wasn't ready for the big boy's club to have the spotlight on my relationship, it was bad enough their eyes were watching my every move at work, but my personal life?

And yeah, that was the reason for about 6 months, but I knew in my soul of souls that I wanted her. Solely her. I didn't care about bureaucracy that much, hell, I was the reason there were eyes on me after the shooting they'd watched me like a hawk.

But no, that wasn't the reason. It was my safety net. My excuse to mull over my own grievances with love and relationships. I could see the sadness wash over her face every time I'd say 'not now', and it broke me each time.

I just...wasn't ready. I wasn't ready to admit to myself that I was worthy and deserving of love. That a relationship could be healthy/

I was constantly watching my back, waiting for it all to fall so I could prove myself right. When it didn't...When I almost lost her to my own foolishness, it was the biggest wake-up call of my life. — Waking up in that hospital bed, I remember it vividly. Looking to my right to see a sea of ginger curls strewn about my bed, her soft snores filled my ears. She sat in the uncomfortable hospital chair with her head lying on my bed, and it was clear she hadn't gotten any sleep in days.

Later, I was told I'd been in a coma for three weeks.

In those three weeks, she'd never left my side until she had to shower, eat, or change. Morgan told me he'd arrive only to see her doing work beside me and Hotch was more than gracious enough to allow her to be with me.

⌫

Her eyes opened, pained by the awful fluorescent lighting overhead, and as her eyes adjusted to the harsh lighting, she heard a familiar sound, those soft snores like music to her ears when she looked to her right and her suspicions were correct. You rest your head on your arms laid on the edge of her bed just next to her arm without the IV in it. You looked so peaceful, but she noticed how pale your usually cocoa skin looked.

She can't help but wonder how long you'd been there.

When she turns her head away from you, still scanning her surroundings, a soft British accent sounds out beside her rasp and sleep coating your vocals.

"Elle". You spoke so breathlessly as if you'd received the biggest surprise of your life. She took note of the way your eyes immediately welled up, apologies stumbling from your lips, "Baby, I'm so sorry I didn't mean—”

She'd shushed you, scooting over and patting a spot next to her. When you join her on the hospital bed that barely fits one let alone two, she kisses the top of your head, hand scratching and massaging through your soft ginger afro, she sighs and shakes her head, looking down at you.

"I know you didn't. Just sleep with me for right now, yeah"?

A tear slips from your eyes, you nuzzle gently into her side further, careful to not worsen any of her injuries.

"Yeah".

↳

I'd probably asked her to repeat what had almost happened to me a thousand times, something about hearing it was healing almost.

Though, she could make anything sound interesting with her voice like honeycomb. It was the one of the first things about her that’d caught my attention.

She knew how to make it real for me.

⌫

Elle lay in your arms, her head resting in your lap with your nails massaging her scalp. This wasn't the first time she'd asked you to retell the story, it was the fourth in a single week. You were happy to oblige, even if it hurt you to talk about seeing her almost die, You knew she needed this, and if it helped her in any way, you were glad to.

"The bullet hit a major artery. The doctor had come out to tell us of your death, I think my knees nearly buckled when I heard her starting to apologize".

She'd looked up at you, eyes and ears focusing solely on you like she hadn't heard the story a previous three times, she'd kissed the back of your hand gently when you had to stop for a moment to recollect yourself talking about how you'd thought you'd lost the love of your life.

Finally, you spoke again, eyes glossy.

"When she was about to call it, tell us her condolences, another of the surgical team ran out to tell her that there was a pulse, you could be saved. As soon as I heard the news, I did drop to my knees. I did. I thanked the stars that I'd get another chance to make it right, to tell you how much I loved you and regretted my words".

"You're doing so good, Beautiful", she'd whispered to you appreciatively, knowing how hard this was for you, It only made her love you that much more seeing the lengths you would go to to help her heal.

"It was touch and go for a few hours after that, you once again died on the table, three times. Finally, the doctor was about to give up until you got a steady pulse. They told us you fought like hell to get back to the team. But I couldn't help but think maybe..."

"It was. It was you, I don't remember much. I was talking to my father on the jet. Telling him all about the team, all about you. How I couldn't leave you just yet...Not on such a standstill".

Your breath caught in your throat at her words, you'd had your fair share of near-death experiences when working in SVU but you weren't sure you'd felt anything but coldness, a darkness. Elle had something to live for. She'd chosen to live for you.

"Y/n".

Your eyes shot to hers, she'd never really addressed you by your first name, only pet names she'd gifted you. So, when she'd said it, she'd gotten your full attention.

"Yea"?

"You were right...You were right, look, for a while" She sat up, moving to face you before continuing, "For a while it was about work, me wanting to continue lying. But, you were right. It wasn't just that".

Elle grabbed your hands in hers, her hazel eyes a vision of fall as she stared into yours, you knew the woman better than anyone, you could see this was hard for her; being vulnerable.

"I never thought of love as something that could be achieved in our field, not long term at least, and after about three failed relationships in, I stopped pursuing. I became terrified of commitment, and when you came along..."

"You got scared of the things you felt". You finished for her, sighing softly and pressing your forehead against hers, "Me too".

She nodded, "When I left your office thinking we were over, I realized my own cowardice. I knew I couldn't just lose you like that. I was gonna speak up and apologize. Talk it out. Anything. Until"

"Everything..." You whisper and cup her cheek in your hand, searching her eyes for that love, and when you see it. That same glint from first meeting, the side of your lips quirked up into a delicate smile, "I love you, Agent Greenaway".

"And I love you far more, Agent Y/ln".

𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪

I glance at the door anxiously, eyes shifting from that to the clock ticking slowly on the wall, and back. Putting this in the hands of someone other than my own was nerve-wracking, especially dealing with something this important.

Eventually, the door opens, and I'm almost allowed to breathe, but not yet. Not just yet. You're almost there Elle.

Entrusting this with Penelope Garcia of all people was the scariest part of all this, but she came through without spilling all, I admit. She smiles at me, giving a thumbs up. And I appreciate it, I do, but it's not any more comforting. Right now nothing could comfort me.

And then, I look to her.

(check image descs)

A vision of perfection stood before me, and as Garcia finally removed her blindfold, I could feel my face get hot, my heart pumping faster. She was stunning. We stare at each other in awe, I can feel my father whispering in my ear that I was making a good decision.

For so long I'd rejected the idea, and now it was something I was more sure of than anything else in my life.

"Come here, Mi Amor" I hear myself whisper, my voice caught in my throat as I prepared myself for the task ahead. She walks over to me with her hand still cupping her mouth in shock as she grasps what the box in my hand means.

When she's close enough, I get on one knee. The tears welling in my eyes a perfect match for the ones in her.

"You two argue like an old married couple". "They're still at it? Ugh, get a room".

(check image descs)

My voice shakes, I'd never proposed to anyone, let alone after only a year of dating.

"Y/n Y/ln, happy one-year anniversary. Where do I even start this? I know this is probably soon, but...If there's anything in this world I've ever been sure of, It'd be you. My hesitance with commitment almost lost me the most wonderful woman ever crafted. I'm tired of running. I'm tired of hiding...I want you. Forever. Will you do me the honor and marry m-"

Before I could get another word in, I felt her launch herself into my arms, her hold on me confirmed everything I already knew.

I couldn't let anyone else have her. She was too valuable to me. To this world.

"YES! Yes, I'd be so honoured to be your Mrs. Elle Greenaway"!

𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪

A/N: A bit of a trauma dump ahead, but I'm back after going through the death of my uncle only a week ago, having horrible PTSD and sickle cell kicking my ass. I hope this is to your liking, lovely! Sorry for the long wait ):

[donnyclaws]

i just wanna say i LOVE your writing style, it flows so nicely but has this fragmentation that really just emphasizes all the right things. it really feels like the perfect way to capture tiger crawls home

Blows myself up 💥💥 that's the perfect word for it I think. Literally normal scene writing stressed me out bc I was like oh everything needs to be written down but also shown, and also in a voice that isn't confusing, good grammer, idw be a fake analysis fan who has nonsensical writing. But I find it really hard to start and do and think in that way, didn't realize the whole 'stop doing parts of art you don't like' thing applies to writing too. And getting jnto b horror has made me even more fond of lowbrow writing that just isn't good at all, I love it because it is good it's jsut bad by one standard. Lmao. Love the idea of your ideas and themes being strong enough to outweigh its presentation yknow.

So with Hatchfiend I'd been sitting on a script almost all year and liked how it felt to read, tried to lean into the kinda chopped up nonsense word style my brain tends to speak in and really liked the result. It feels way easier to handle dialogue and actions, let's me indulge, and if there's a bit of writing that feels wrong in my gut, I'm not beholden to any rules about how to communicate it I jsut need to write something else that hits the just right isms. I'm sure it'll end up being hard to read for people, and unclear, but it's 4 me and I prefer that.

Anyway thankyou I'm very happy to hear that. I feel like I just want to get tiger crawl home (what I have so far) out of my system bc it's clogging up my brain, bc I kinda use thinking abt scenes repetitively as a weird emotional processor that's not very healthy anymore. And with other shit idk, I used to hate the idea of doing tiger crawl home or anyrbing else as writing bc it felt ljke necessity. Now I'm very excited abt this, between this and zines, I really like writing and I'm happy that this can be a medium to work in since full comics aren't of interest or ability to me. But also still let's me add visuals and do literally anything and I can make a dense ass old web page to host it on. Heaven.

ANYWAY THANK YOU THANK YOU sorry for the Ramble 🌈♥️♥️

[anachronistic-falsehood]

ok ok of u wont talk abt them on ur official analysis post HERE 🎫 i am handing u a free pass to go OFF about passive/active class and also muse of life/lord of doom >:] ooooo infecting you with classpect brain worms....

*visibly trembling like a chihuahua out of excitement* WELLLLLLLL. I SUPPOSE. IF U INSIST

OK. OK. Tristamp Vash. guy who's got feminine characteristics in his story, narrative foil to his twin brother who's got a lot of masculine characteristics. We got that down we're all caught up!! classpect time :3 (putting this under a read more because this got LONG)

Obviously classpects vary wildly between different people's perspectives, and even within the text of Homestuck itself, but there are some heavily implied roles that each class/aspect has. Time is generally an aspect associated with masculinity, Witches are typically girls, etc. Ofc Vash and Knives can have different classpects than these, but making them a Muse of Life and Lord of Doom respectively just FITS. SO WELL.

Since there's only one Muse and one Lord in Homestuck, there's not much to draw from when analyzing these classes, but there are some insinuations to be made! Muses likely a class more common in women, and Lords are likely more often men. The Life aspect is one that in text, we have only seen in female players, and only male players have had the Doom aspect (not that those aspects are gender-exclusive, but it is a PATTERN).

Life is a nurturing, motherly aspect. Jane Crocker is often treated/seen as a mother (despite being 16, which is a whole other can of worms), and her older self, Nanna Egbert, is one of the few Homestuck characters to canonically be a mother!!! Feferi is the heiress to an entire planet, and her Beforan self is a coddling motherly figure to her empire. Vash is the silent guardian of No-Man's Land, protecting people and being kind and gentle to everyone ESPECIALLY KIDS! We've seen how he is with kids, in Tristamp and every other version! Also in Tristamp, Vash is. a fucking parent now. Knives used Vash to make all these Plants get pregnant. Very violating, but it fits with the maternal themes already associated with him.

Knives and Doom. The only two Doom players we have are the Captors (and I am by no means an expert on Mituna so we're mostly working with Sollux here). However, both are shown to have powers that have extremely destructive potential. Sollux is also a Dave parallel, which means he's also a Masculine Cool Kid, just to a lesser extent. Doom isn't an inherently masculine aspect but there are bits and pieces of it reflected in the people who hold that aspect.

It's also... an extremely lonely aspect. There are only two people who hold it, one of which is a joke character, and the other of which isn't even present for the kids' victory. It's not a needed aspect for a successful session. Neither is Life, but it's still a good one to have in many sessions! Doom is more so an extra, something more directly helpful when it's paired with a negative class (Bard, Prince, Rogue, Thief, etc.). It's not needed to balance anything out except for the Aspect Wheel itself in the coding of Sburb. Knives is a very lonely character. He's not needed. Not in the lives of Plants and humans, and not in the life of his brother.

Now for Classes! Muses are passive; things happen to them, they rarely make things happen. Calliope sat around and waited for someone to come rescue her with a ring of life, doing nothing but telling her story to the poor dead souls who crossed her path. Alt!Calliope finally took action in the end, but how long did that take? How long was she stuck in the bubbles, searching for very specific souls to guide them to the right paths? Aimless and wandering with no one and nothing to keep her grounded, HMMM DOESN'T THAT SOUND LIKE A HUMANOID TYPHOON WE KNOW??? HMMMMMMM

In contrast, Lords are very active. Caliborn takes charge, makes decisions, and works off of a myriad of terrible instincts and loose guidance. He's also an incredibly masculine character (or so he wants us to think). He takes control over his sister's life, he takes control over the lives of others when he's part of Doc Scratch and then Lord English. He is the puppeteer! Everyone else is just an object for his own gain, HMMMM DOESN'T THAT SOUND LIKE A GENOCIDAL PLANT THAT WE KNOW?? HMMMMM

Maybe if Knives chose a different path, he could have been a Prince, or a Thief, but he's a Lord of Doom. This is the path he's chosen, much like Caliborn and how he chose to kill his sister and enter a dead session. This is what Knives has chosen to do. Both are forcing the world and their siblings into whatever roles they see fit.

The Lord of Time shatters the universe- Space itself, the realm of his sister. The Lord of Doom shatters the Life of his brother. This is not the inherent role of a Lord, but these are the paths they have chosen. The narrative parallels are there. The Lord kills the Muse, he takes choice away from the universe, he breaks it for his own gain.

[aquaquadrant]

i dont know if this makes sense to anyone else or if its just me. but villainous thing by shayfer james is So perfect for your hels to pay au. like

"welcome, won't you come inside?"- can be a lot of things, like atlas's welcoming facade to tango and bravo to get them into his trap, and also the whole 'smiling while i beat the everloving Shit out of you" vibe of papa al's mansion

"suddenly you're very near as i prefer you"- atlas keeping tango imprisoned so he can keep his property

"you have always been a delicate disaster / fine of fire and of frame"- other than just the fire part writing itself. i think this can mean the amount of tests hels tek had to do to break tango and just atlas kinda knowing tango doesnt like him but he doesnt rly care

"oh dear, let me see those smokey eyes / 'cause you're a villainous thing / and we cant have you living a lie"- the ...racism?? idk hybrid discrimination all around hels tek aka. how atlas doesnt care abt tango as a person bc of his blaze roots. also just like smokey eyes?? the fire imagery in this song is AH

"while they wait by gates of pearl / we'll be building castles in purgatory"- THIS IS HELS. also this can mean papa al's mansion, hels tek, and any other like monolith in hels bc while everyone else is scraping by to survive they have all the power

"and you'll find no ever after here / it's clear this isn't what you came for / i'll be your puckish puppeteer / on this delightful little detour"- atlas trying to pitch his uh. business model to bravo. aka asking him to do the bidding of hels tek with a promise that he can go to hermitcraft

SORRY IF THIS ASK IS TOO LONG I JUST GOT RLY EXCITED WHEN I LISTENED TO THIS SONG (its very good. also i think the general tone/vibe of it matches with that nasty showman glamour.)

and i love your au, it snuck in the walls of my brain and camped out there so uh thanks LOL /lh <33

OHHHH his this is so cool!!! i’ve never heard shayfer james before, that song has some really cool jaunty vibes 💃 and YESSS i can absolutely see this fitting the au!! atlas in particular matches so well with that shady showman feel like you said, and your analysis is spot on.

and BTDUBS don’t apologize for sending long stuff like this y’all, i absolutely love it!! warms my heart to know ppl enjoy the au <3

[rodrickheffley]

know i complain abt how unchallenging taylors music is compared to how its spoken about by her/her fans but like. i really do not think she is in any way at the forefront of the literacy crisis like at least she's encouraging young people to look up words they don't know and to be excited about the Idea of analysis.

i think its silly when ppl make fun of ppl for not already knowing the relatively less common words when the age range of her fans is quite large extends to very young people but also again at leaat they look these things up and are being encouraged to learn Something

re the analysis part the analysis being done is of course for the most part very service level but there is more in depth analysis that Can and is being done that isn't just easter egg hunting like i get the way that fans talk about it as if they/she are geniuses for something you yourself find to be a simple concept can be frustrating/annoying but i would rather ppl be pretentious abt it than be doing no analysis whatsoever and only listening to stuff with vocab already known by the listener

[neoputo]

okay, here we go

[ first of all, a lil disclaimer: these are my thoughts + opinions, this doesn't mean they're 100% right, at all. it's just some stuff i kept wondering abt after reading some theories and thought might be fun (?) to share. just to provide a look from a different angle, and to bring more questioning to the table. needless to say, i very much respect the authors of these theories, and i think their analytical skills are on another level! i would've never been able to come up with all that by myself! AND this post wouldn't exist if it wasn't for those analysis. so yeah, just wanted to make this clear. ]

anyway, these are some things i found that i think the following theories don't cover/might've missed out/might be wrong abt:

first, about "the *original* original sin theory": i feel like something's missing. this something being: there is no explanation for aziraphale's weird ass smile in the ending/credits scene. like, while i was reading the theory, i found myself nodding most of the time, and when i was getting closer to the end, i was hoping there would be some explanation for that final scene. but there wasn't! look, i'm not that smart, so i find it really hard to figure out why azi would smile like that after everything that happened, specially if we consider this theory to be true. something doesn't add up. there's something so wrong abt that smile. like,, on that same scene, crowley looks DEVASTATED and it makes sense! i feel aziraphale should look just as sad and broken, tho, and he doesn't. i mean, if it was a fake smile, i'd believe it was to deceive metatron, or pretend he is okay with his decision in front of him, or whatever. but it's not a fake smile. it's not a genuine one either. it's a very weird, kinda creepy smile??? like, michael sheen, you're amazing! but also, what the heck?! why would azi do that? (i have no idea. this is just me pointing this out, i don't have the brains to figure it out lol sorry!).

now, the other theory, "the magic trick you didn't see": i actually found this analysis very interesting and backed up with a lot of evidence as well! BUT (of course there's a but), i also feel like the author was kind of pushing it a bit too much sometimes. let me explain myself: i feel there are some moments that the author catalogues as "metatron's intervention/manipulation of memories" that, in my opinion, dont seem much like that... let's exemplify!

the "before the beginning" scene: honestly, i thought this scene was lovely! and i don't think metatron could've manipulated to draw aziraphale away from crowley. at all. in this scene, crowley is pictured as a cute little baby angel; so pure, so filled with excitement and curiosity and hope. he's also a bit naive, too, specially in comparison with aziraphale, who, on the other hand, looks baby but not so baby... he knows how things work up in heaven, he knows angels aren't that good (tho he might not admit it or say it out loud), he knows they aren't as free-willed as they might think they are, or want to be. so ofc, when crowley starts making questions + suggesting a suggestion box, aziraphale worries abt him. cus he knows how things work. and he knows angel!crowley could get in trouble for that. and he likes angel!crowley, boy! he so obviously does. so, aziraphale, much more aware of the situation and the way things work, is not withdrawn by crowley's innate curiosity. i think he actually likes that abt him, he might even think it's adorable. azi is just scared of what could happen to baby crowley, and i think he's trying to protect him. in conclusion, i personally think both aziraphale and crowley feel very much in character, which is to say, this memory doesn't feel/look manipulated or altered by metatron. not to me at least.

—i think there might be other scenes that the author labeled as "metatron's intervention/manipulation of memories" that i don't agree with, but i don't remember rn. guess i should read the analysis again to refresh my memory, but i won't do that rn, sorry!

also, i've already mentioned maggie's possible autism on another post!

okayyyyy,, this is it. i hope y'all (whoever you are) enjoyed reading this & thanks for taking your time! pls let me know what you think! i love discussing theories and thoughts on good omens with strangers lol but fr!

byebyeeeee

[mostlymaudlin]

WIP game: “lessons never learned” (if you don’t mind talking about it!)

i DEFINITELY do not mind talking about this :D

okay, first of all, this fic does not have a single word written for it, but it DOES have a title because it's taken from @sillyunicorn's andreil fan song, Shake You -- which is an absolutely bop and also captures exactly the vibe i am going to try to go for.

despite not having written any of it, this idea lives RENT FUCKING FREE in my head because it is going to be my Andrew POV of The Series attempt. i feel like every big Andrew POV Enjoyer has to give it a shot at some point, right?

my whole thing with this fic is that im waiting until i move into my own place bc i want to like.. make a fucking murder board on a whole ass wall as i try to plot it. i'm going to do a really intentional reread and take so many notes... im so excited. and i don't want to just tell neil's story from andrew's POV -- i wanna tell andrew's story, so the timeline won't match up to the series.

this is going to be a labor of literary analysis more than anything, which is fun for me because im a nerd. it's also why i avert my eyes from the extra content as much as possible, because i want to be able to draw my own conclusions from the canon proper lol. (sorry to people who like it when people put the ec to narrative, but this will not be compliant.)

You are a lesson I will never learn You are a blister from a sweet sunburn

//

I can't seem to shake you I can't turn away I could almost break you When you look at me that way

^^kati's song is all about andrew not being able to withhold neil from himself -- it's about giving into a thing that is good for him, despite it being the antithesis of all the walls he's built to protect himself. that's andrew's capital s Story. he thinks he's "learned his lesson" because he's been hurt so many times, but here he is, hoping for home and trust and comfort yet again. and this time, neil's trying to convince him that it's real -- that he doesn't need to learn to push these wants away. (and anyway, is that even possible? how could you learn that lesson? how much of yourself do you have to give up for that -- how far can you push yourself before you break? questions we shall explore in this fic lmfao.)

i love andrew. i feel like ive been Studying him for a year and i think i can tackle this in a way that feels very true at least to my interpretation of his character. so im really pumped abt this!!