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talenlee · 1 year

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January Wrapup, 2023!

It’s not the end of the month just yet. I’m looking down the barrel of the end of the month, and seeing what’s coming in the last week or so, and phew. I better write this month’s wrapup now because at some point I’m going to be helping someone move house and that’s not fun at the best of times.

Let’s check out first of all, what I wrote this month about games in the Game Pile:

Keep The Heroes Out: This was a really fun cooperative board game that I enjoyed playing a lot. What’s more, playing it, I kept thinking about the way that the game used its particular structure of iconography and a rulebook to displace the game systems away from a lot of reading. It’s beautiful, it’s indulgent, there’s not a lot of time waste in the box on something that isn’t adding something cool to the game.

Speedrunning the Swindle: I wanted to make something that suited the theme of GDQ that was running at the time, and I decided to make a video about finally getting off my butt and making a speedrun archive page for The Swindle. As of right now? I’m still the world leader at The Swindle which means, odds are good, you can probably get the record off me.

Crystal Caves: There’s always space for something small and weird from gaming’s history, and it seems that if you ask me about the old games from the Apogee shareware catalogue, you’ll find me eventually bringing it back to assumptions about the world and what working class people look like. What’s acceptable? What’s normal? Turns out: working for huge piles of money and still always needing to do more work!

A 2023 Channel Trailer: With the dissolution of twitter’s importance in my life, I decided I wanted to redo my channel trailer. This meant using most of the existing audio, but redoing it to both refine it down to exactly 2 minutes long, and using it to present my new animated avatar. I got to do a lot of improvement from this video, like how to make it lip-sync to audio without needing to prop a microphone into my headphones!

And this month’s posting in the Story Pile:

Goncharov: I wrote an explainer on the giant consensual play experience of funning around with the gimmick fake movie, Goncharov from November 2022, and the strangely condescending way everyone who wasn’t enjoying it thought it should have been done.

The Rendezvous: There are a lot of pieces of media that relate to speedrunning of sorts, you know, almost anything built about a race, documentaries about speedrunning, all that good stuff. But I love finding ways to connect older things to current things, and this is one of my dad’s favourite movies that happens to be an IRL speedrun that just happens to have also been really illegal.

Megatokyo: This article is over four thousand words long. Read aloud, it’s over forty minutes. Do you want me to make a video version of this?

Children of Time: I loved this book about cat-sized spider culture! I don’t talk much about books I read (because a lot of the books I read are more academic than fictional) but this was a really cracking one that I read last year and actually kept putting off because I wanted to write about it when it would be fun to do so.

My Hero Academia, Season 1: Oh hey, you know those huge sprawling TV series that are hard to examine as a single, big chunk? I’ve decided to try breaking them up into separate articles so I can examine them in terms of the kinds of time commitment they ask of you!

This is a month for maintenance. I’m trying this year to do more with each post; fewer posts that are really brief and don’t feature a solid amount of words and images. Generally, a thousand words, or five minutes of audio, or an image made for the post (as is the exchange rate for words, I understand). I’m trying to make it so I don’t pad things out much, and use each potential space to say some stuff to do so – like the ‘welcome to 2023 post‘ this year was also a consideration of what it means to blog for ten years and why I started.

There are articles I hold off on writing until I can dedicate time to being sure I’m happy with them, comfortable with how they read and I can run them past people, spoken aloud — and for me, this month, the example is the article about ‘Losing’ Bridget. This grew out of considering the challenges of two different axes I know can feel really rough: Being a wrong kind of fan and being a guy in a space where it feels like people are celebrating something you didn’t think was hurting anyone. I thought this was a worthy topic to think about and talk about, and to try and serve as a guy, as a positive example to other guys about how to relate to this challenging space without hurting other people out of defiance or thoughtlessness.

If you like me talking about my D&D setting, and why I made the choices I did, I wound up telling the story of the founding of a goblin city and how it put the King’s Highway through the nation of Dal Raeda. This year I’m doing a big project with my Magic: The Gathering custom cards, creating a whole set with flavour and worldbuilding. It’s called the Usurper’s Palace and I wrote about it in a little more detail, and you can follow it now throughout the year. I wrote a bit about Josh Lyman (first time being here), the character from the West Wing, and one of the many instances in which he was a shitty dude who sucks. It’s pretty important since Josh Lyman is a fictional character who was able to will himself into an embarrassing real existence. Finally, during GDQ I wrote about The Grasshopper, a book I like a lot because I find its definition of games and how we play them interesting, and how that book relates to the idea of a speedrun.

This month’s shirt is a simple text-on-field kind of design about what it’s like to exist in my head at the right time and place, where the phrase I’m fine, and you? is something resting atop and keeping you safe from an extremely extensive kind of haranguing that wants to talk about specific, intriguing media events that excite and frustrate me. You can get it in white text and black text!

This month featured a return to PhD meetings, my niblings going on an international trip, one of my best friends being away from home, GDQ, Fox getting a vaccine booster and reacting to it poorly in the pharmacy, the build-up for Cancon, then the actual running of Cancon, Australia day, and a housemove. This is a month where two absolute bastard Catholics dropped dead, I fucked up pretty badly and then I spent weeks trying to unfuck the upfuck.

I am writing this a week out and I feel good about what I’m trying to do, but I’m also just feeling that constant low-key jostling watery stomach feeling. I find myself talking to the air around me like here’s why I made the mistake I did, which isn’t helpful and doesn’t do anything beyond get me dwelling on the mistake again, and that makes me feel stupid, and that’s not a good place. I try to respond to this feeling when I notice myself doing it by just getting to work on the thing I fucked up and trying to address it.

Right now I am looking at it in another tab and I want to make sure I don’t fuck it up while trying to unfuck it.

Also, funny thing? I was really interested in working on board games while I was at Cancon, but I didn’t have the time. Everything was way too bloody busy for me to sit down and spend time talking with people about game designs! And that’s normally a time when I have heaps of time to look at games, look at game designs and things in the library and ask myself ‘how would I approach that? How would I implement that?’

No chance.

I’m shocked at how busy this month has been but god damnit I am going to get this done.

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

#Diary

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offender42085 · 2 years

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Post 0177

Thomas J Johnson, Florida inmate Q90390, born 2000, incarceration intake at age 19, sentenced to life.

Sexual Battery Victim under 12, Obstructing Crime Investigation, Introduction of Contraband into a Detention Facility

Johnson stood motionless — his hand in his pockets – as the Judge read his sentencing decision. In the back of the courtroom, his mother and sister quietly sobbed.

Earlier, Johnson asked to make a statement during the hearing. He turned to those gathered in the courtroom, including the child’s family, and apologized.

“I’m sorry to the (child’s) family for all the pain and misery that this impacted on your lives,” he said.

Since Johnson was 17 and a juvenile when the crime took place in April 2018, he didn’t face a mandatory life sentence for sexual battery on a child, as would have been imposed on an adult. Instead, the Judge had latitude in imposing sentence after Johnson pleaded no contest to that charge and tampering with evidence.

In sentencing Johnson, the judge said the nature of the crime called for Johnson to be sentenced as an adult.. He also designated Johnson as a sexual predator, which would restrict his access to the internet, where he could live and other factors if he’s released from prison.

After the sentencing hearing, the girl’s father said he was relieved Johnson was sentenced to life imprisonment instead of something less, but he didn’t think even a life sentence was enough.

“It isn’t justice enough for my daughter,” he said. “I honestly think the death penalty is the way to go on a lot of things like this, but, of course, there are laws against things and they don’t do that anymore.”

Her mother said she was glad Johnson won’t be free to hurt anyone else’s child.

“I don’t like the fact that 20 years down the road they can redo the sentencing again,” she said, “but if they do, I will be here for that, to fight it.”

Under Florida law, juvenile defendants who are sentenced to life imprisonment are automatically brought back before the sentencing judge after 20 years, at which time the court reviews any rehabilitation that’s taken place and determines whether prison is still appropriate. Should the judge decide the defendant needs to remain in custody, another automatic review is scheduled for 10 years later.

Johnson was arrested April 28, 2018, just hours after calling the girl’s father to say she had been hurt and he needed to come home. The father called 911, and Johnson told deputies a masked intruder dressed all in black came into the home while he was sleeping. Johnson said he had chased the man from the house, then realized the child – one of three that had been left in his care that night – had been hurt.

As the investigation continued the night of the attack, a deputy and a K-9 went outside the mobile home in the rural Alturas area to track the stranger’s movements. The track, however, led to a bloody sheet that Johnson later admitted to hiding in the woods behind the house.

In her closing argument to the Court, the Assistant State Attorney reminded the Judge that the child was bleeding and crying in pain after the attack, and Johnson waited to call for help.

“Instead of going and helping her,” she said, “even at that point, he chose himself. He chose ... to go through the backyard, through the pasture, to the orange grove, to the trees and into the trees to hide that sheet, while she was sitting there bleeding, in all that pain. That baby – who is still crying so loudly (deputies) could hear her when they got to the home. That is powerful, judge, and one of the most disturbing things about this case.”

The Defense lawyer, with the state Office of Criminal Conflict and Civil Regional Counsel, had presented testimony that Johnson’s immaturity, his history of sexual abuse involving relationships with older women, his addiction to pornography and masturbation and his impulsiveness caused by his attention deficit disorder ultimately led to the attack that April night. She was seeking a lighter sentence Friday that would have enabled Johnson to receive therapy for those problems.

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lumini-317 · 3 years

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Hello!

This will be my official “introductory” post!

My real name is Erica, but I go by many names. My nickname repertoire includes but is not limited to: Lumi, Lumini, Cricket (I have a habit of rubbing my feet together, lmao), Jinx, Eri, Er, EriJoy, Sunbaeby, and Aceir (my real name but in alphabetical order).

This is my first ever Tumblr blog. I’ve had it for a while but have rarely posted anything, that along with the fact that I’m on mobile is kind of a mess so I apologize for mistakes and all that.

I have 3 older brothers, an older sister, and a younger brother.

I’m an ambivert. Sometimes I love hanging out with bigger groups of people, other times I dread it.

I’ve taken the “16personalities” test 4 times and all 4 put me in the “Diplomat” category, however I got “Advocate” (INFJ) 2 times, and “Protagonist” (ENFJ) and “Mediator” (INFP) 1 time each.

I am LGBTQ+. I’m asexual, aro+panromantic flux, and while I feel like I’m genderfluid, the changes are very subtle and so I sometimes just go with agender, gendervoid, or neutrois. It’s a lot less complicated that way. I’m ambiamorous, and also pronoun apathetic!

I love whump. I’ve loved it for as long as I can remember but only found the whump community maybe 3(?) years ago.

I also love K-Pop, C-Pop, J-Pop, and Asian dramas, mainly K-Pop and K-Dramas, though.

I’m a HUGE multistan. ATEEZ, SKZ, TBZ, EXO, BTS, Red Velvet, SHINee, iKON, MONSTA X, TWICE, TO1, WANNA ONE, SuperM, X1, MIRAE, Ciipher, Golden Child, Purple Kiss, BAE173, SF9, IU, ONEUS, ONEWE, The Rose, PIXY, LUCY, STAYC, WEi (which I pronounced as “way” for an embarrassingly long time), Dreamcatcher, Brave Girls, TXT, ENHYPEN, SNSD, KARD, AKMU, SHAUN, Gaho, NCT, GHOST9, 1team, SE7EN, Cross Gene, D1ce, AB6IX, CRAVITY, BLACKPINK, CIX, VIXX, f(x), 4Minute, CLC, YEZI, B.I, Wonho, (G)I-DLE, EVERGLOW, SEVENTEEN, BROOKLYN, Ha Hyunsang, DAY6, GOT7, Teen Top, BAP, TREASURE, UNIQ, etc! It goes on, far longer than I can list. I am also very much against fanwars, they disgust me.

I’m also a HUGE animal lover, and a big softie. I can’t even squish insects. I don’t care that they can’t feel pain and don’t experience emotions, I just can’t bring myself to. I make it my mission to save any type of animal I come across. I find toads in our koi pond and immediately pick them out and take them to a safe place. I help turtles across the road. I got a mouse out of a puddle and revived it, releasing it when it was healthy enough. I saw a snail on a piece of wood that was going to be thrown on a fire and carefully pulled it off and put it somewhere else. So far I’ve found 5 stray cats (Piper, Toothless, Felix, Kai, and Kit Kat—all were found as skinny, sickly kittens) and took them in, raising them as my own. I rescued a chipmunk from certain death-by-cat. I’ve even saved a few baby raccoons, ducklings, lizards, spiders, and snakes in my time. And I’ll keep doing so for as long as I live.

I love writing, drawing/sketching, and painting, however I’m not confident that I’m good at any of those things, lmao. I mean, I don’t think I’m the worst, but my finished “works” often leave me unsatisfied with my “skills”. But of course, that won’t stop me from trying to improve!

I’m a maladaptive daydreamer. This can cause issues in some places while helping me out in others. On one hand, it makes doing chores and such kind of difficult. Like one time I had to take care of my dad’s pigeons while he was fixing our shed and one time he pointed out how slow I was with the chores. His words were something along the lines of, “I’m already almost done with what I have to do and you’re still working with the pigeons.” Also, it (and maybe ADHD if I do have it?) made school a nightmare for me. But it’s also helpful because then during church it’s really easy to keep myself occupied while the pastors go on about their Magical Sky Daddy™’s son throwing a tantrum and killing a figtree because it didn’t have any figs and how that story should “challenge” us or something.

The characters in my daydreams are weird, though. They merge and separate with each other to make different characters depending on the situation. Most of them don’t have definite genders. Only a handful of them have names because they’re always merging and separating like some kind of Shadow Clone Masters or something. Stuff like that.

One of my characters is for sure a demi-boy, though, and his name is Kyler.

I brought this up because I was watching The Andy Griffith Show and Andy was giving Opie a lecture on how many poor kids there are in the world and used the ratio “one and a half boys per square mile”. Opie then says that he’s “never seen a half a boy before”. Kyler just sort of pops into (fake) existence, jumps off the couch, and throws his arms in the air while saying, “Half a boy, right here!” I burst out laughing. Thankfully it didn’t seem weird, since my parents started laughing at Opie and thought that I was just laughing at it, too.

Any-who.

If I daydream while I’m standing, I’ll often pace and gesture with my arms while moving my lips. Sometimes I’ll even whisper. If I’m sitting down, I usually fidget a lot (such as pick at my shirt and rub my feet together), stare into space, and move my lips or whisper. My family sometimes ask me, “Why are you whispering?” Or, “What are you grinning about?” And I just shrug because I don’t know how to explain it to them without risking them calling someone to pray over me, lmao. I mean, I wasn’t even allowed to have imaginary friends because that was “evil”. When I was about 7, I told my parents about my imaginary unicorn friend and they gave me a lecture and “prayed over me”. It was embarrassing and awkward for me.

I’m suspicious that I might have ADHD, but don’t have the money to actually get a professional diagnosis. I’m also too scared to ask my parents about it.

Speaking of which, my family and I don’t see eye-to-eye. I mean, they don’t know it because I’m good at hiding it, and they think I agree with mostly everything they do but boy, is it a mess.

You see, they’re evangelical conservative Christians. “LGBTQ+ people are going to hell”, “ThE LeFt ARe eViL AnD ARe TrYiNg To BrAiNwAsh OuR ChiLdrEn”, “Trump was sent by God”, “Intersex is fake”, “Women must submit to men”, “You should get married no later than in a year or ‘the temptation’ to have sex might become too much”, the whole bit.

Meanwhile I’m over here with my (imaginary) pride flags, just existing as an agnostic leftist who wants everyone to have equal rights, regardless of gender identity or sexual orientation, and would rather redo my horrifically atrocious kindergarten closing program role than pray to a god who (if they/he/she/it/whatever exists) gives cancer to kids and killed millions of innocent animals and people in the Bible.

But they have no idea that this is how I feel and now expect me to be baptized within the next month to show that I have “accepted Jesus Christ as my savior”. Yeah...that’s gonna be an awkward discussion...

Anyway, that’s just some things about me. Sorry that I got sidetracked a few times, lmao!

I look forward to posting more and maybe even making friends!

Thank you for reading (:

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jkirktrash · 3 years

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Since i made a big dumb stupid earlier and accidentally hijacked a post earlier

Lets redo this

This is also just me partially ranting about the dream smp ao3 tagging stuff.

Dream smp this is directed at you guys mostly but. this can go for newer ao3 writers in gen tbh.

Tagging your characters in order of importance! Lots of older fandoms did this and unforunately it seems to have fallen out of habit with some newer fandoms (dsmp i am directly calling you out.) Tagging a character who is seen for a single chapter or less first is misleading. As someone who has been on ao3 a long time i would take that as the charcater is either the pov or a main character. In the dsmp fandom tag thats not how it usually goes. Im not sure if something in the system changed to where you cant order them as you please but if you can order them however you want please do order them correctly.

If a character is only mentioned or seen briefly please for the love of god tag them with mentioned or briefly. Or tag them at the very end! If a character is mentioned please say that. They are not a character in the fic they are simply part of the universe at that point.

If a romantic relationship is for one chapter or only a small bit of the story use the Char a/ Char b (briefly) tag. If a chip is only mentioned do Ca / Cb (mentioned)

If a relationship is one sided do Ca/Cb (onesided)

On another note! Your character that you are writing in the pov of likely has a centric tag! Check it out! If it does! Use it :).

For example: fundy fics often get lost in the "fundy is mentioned here but im not going to tell you he's only mentioned!" Fics! So instead of painstakingly trying to figure out which is which i lurk in the #fundy centric tag on ao3 :)! I've read every fic there! And so have many many other fundy fans. I'm sure any niki or awsamdude or ponk fans have similar tags! Using them will get your fics noticed!

Dont use slashes for platonic relationships! For example Ca/Cb (platonic) is not a valid ao3 tag. It will be put into the romance tag on ao3. Using that will drive your readers away! Romance is Ca/Cb and platonic is Ca&Cb!

Use many tags to describe whats in the fic. Say what the endgame ship is! Say the minute details! Say funny notes or small things that arent necessarily ao3 tags in your tags. Why? These things help people find content they like and often times, small things are what make a fic. I love searching up the technoblade and fundy tag with uncle technoblade! Why? Those are my fave fics even if the tags are small as hell! Since people tag them though i find them! Same will go for you and your readers!

To Writers who write 18+ content in the dsmp ao3 tag: actually use the 18+ tags. By this i mean what content is actually in your fic. I have stumbled across many fics that say explicit but because its tagged explicit and some times the actual 18+ content isnt i find sexual stuff instead of the gorey horror fics i was expecting (because like it or not those are often tagged explicit because of extreme violence)

Use your tags wisely and tag the content included. Tag your angst and your romance and you your mentions. Just make sure to tag correctly so everyone has a good time.

I dont mean to be rude or sound angry in this i just see it way too often and nothings changing in the tags.

If i said something wrong or got something incorrect please tell me! I am not a writer. Just an ao3 lurker! I may have been around a while but i dont know the ins and outs. I may have worded something wrong or just in general made a mistake. But i think everything i said is pretty general stuff! Remember even if the tag is small ao3 has a tag for almost everything and if they dont have it write it down anyways because it may just have more fics added to it and it will become a larger tag.

#this is just from the view of a very frustrated reader #i have come across too many untagged/barely tagged fics that are either triggering or just the opposite of what i want read #using the right character tags is very important yall #fundy is mentioned a lot here #oops #dream smp ao3 #dream smp fic #dream smp #dsmp #rant #kinda

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firelordzukohere · 4 years

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Interior Decor

Hello! I started this blog because I wrote a Zuko x Reader fanfiction and I wanted somewhere to post it that wasn’t my main blog.

I came up with the idea for this fic randomly one day and I thought I’d write it down and share it with you all. It’s going to be 4 parts with a possible epilogue, but I’m not sure yet. Please let me know what you think!!

I’ll be updating every Sunday with a new chapter! Hopefully you guys really like this and keep reading!!

I’ve also posted it to AO3 if you’d prefer to read it there

Thanks!

Zuko X Fem!Reader

Warnings: Fluff, Slight Aangst(heh), and some implications

Word Count: Almost 3k

Summary: Iroh felt it was time for the Palace to reflect the time of Peace and Love that Zuko promised five years earlier at his coronation. He takes it upon himself to hire an interior decorator to help his nephew out and work together. What he didn’t expect was for Zuko to possibly find his own peace and love in the process.

Chapter 1: Feng Shui >> Chapter 2: Tchotchke

Walking into the grand entrance of the Fire Nation Palace, (Y/N) couldn't help but stop and begin mentally jotting down the changes she would make to the décor. It was very dingy, dark, and drab, as though the Palace had been sitting in it's own dusty iceberg for a hundred years, keeping it's hatred preserved with each speck of dirt. The windows were covered in black-out fabric, the walls had pictures of past Fire Lords glaring down at those who dared to enter their sacred home of destruction, plants wilted and dead, no life left within them, and the carpet looked as though it had seen millions upon millions of feet within its lifetime.

Now, (Y/N) wasn't trying to be rude, but it was her job to notice these things. She had been hired by General Iroh to redo the interior of the Fire Nation Palace. This meant every single room from the throne room to the dining hall, the ballroom to the Fire Lord's private quarters, everything needed a refresh. She expected this kind of thing to be done back when the Fire Lord had first taken over, however, her services weren't requested until five years after his coronation.

Which is why she stood at the entrance, questioning why it took them so long to get someone in here. The poor Palace staff and the Fire Lord must be drowning in darkness and discomfort. Not to mention cowering in fear at Sozin, Azulon, and Ozai's deep glares within several portraits throughout.

She was busy having a staring contest with Ozai, which she was undoubtedly losing because he was terrifying to look at, when Iroh walked up and greeted her with a warm smile. The look immediately lit the room up, sending a comforting feeling from the top of her head to the bottom of her toes as if she had just dipped herself into the warm ocean to cool off.

"Ah! Miss (Y/N), thank you for your patience," he bowed causing her to return the sign of respect back, "I was just making sure my nephew was ready for our meeting today as well. He's just finishing up with the council, so we'll go on ahead without him and he can catch up," the older man winked before guiding her further into the Palace, "Please, tell me what you think so far, first impressions may not always be accurate, but they do tell quite a lot, especially when it comes to decoration," Iroh said as they walked.

Clearing her throat, (Y/N) tuned into her interior decorator mode. "I feel like I'm living in the Fire Palace from Sozin's time," she said, bluntly, however still with a hint of hope. "I feel like this Palace has most likely been causing the Fire Lord nothing but stress, as though it's a dark cloud looming over his head, watching his every move, almost like Ozai never left." Her voice calm and diplomatic, she had dealt with several Fire Nation officials before and no matter how often she tried to soften the blow, she was usually always dealt with backlash and anger over her honest opinion of the look.

Iroh, however, surprised her, and laughed with his whole body, resting his hands on his stomach for a moment, stopping their stride. "My dear, you are spot on!" This immediately caused (Y/N) to smile brightly, grateful that she was with a client who didn't seem to want to fight her every move. "Even when Ozai and I were boys growing up in the Palace here, we always felt as though we were living during Sozin's reign. Not that we believed that to be a bad thing at the time," he chuckled before continuing on down the hall.

The hallway led into the throne room, which was one of the biggest rooms in the Palace according to the layout that Iroh had given her during her interview with him. The only other room that was as large was the ballroom followed closely by the dining hall.

"This is where my nephew holds council with everyone in all four nations, whoever wants a seat with him. My brother, father, and grandfather stopped using it for that purpose and just became a place to dish out their royal decrees, banishing visitors that were not worthy." (Y/N) frowned listening to the history of this room. "My nephew likes this room to be where he listens and does very little talking, which I think is a wonderful sentiment to have." She nodded and began jotting down notes on her parchment.

There needed to be more light, some greenery added to liven up the place, possibly a little less fire around the throne itself, to seem more welcoming. Overall, the layout of the room was beautiful, it just needed some acceptance instead of deterrence.

Iroh led her toward the next room which appeared to be the ballroom. It was gorgeous, high ceilings with chandeliers, ready for their candles to be lit and make the glass sparkle, tall windows that went nearly from the floor to the ceiling providing a glorious view of the garden outside. Other than a couple of touch ups here and there, this room was incredible. However, it looked like it hadn't been used in centuries. Webs and dust littered the vast room, sheets covered small tables and seating areas and were yellowed with age.

"When my father took power, dancing and parties became nonexistent. He loathed people enjoying themselves, obviously because he did not. My nephew would like to throw a celebration after this redecoration, allowing all nations to come together and dance." Iroh smiled.

"Obviously it was more of a strong suggestion by the Dragon of the West, who rumor has it, excelled in dancing due to his bond with the dragons," a husky voice behind them added, causing the two to turn and find the Fire Lord standing behind them in his royal attire, with a small smirk on his face.

(Y/N) had seen beautiful interiors, gorgeous landscapes, sunsets, flowers, paintings, structures, and everything in between, however, her breath left her body the moment her eyes landed on the Fire Lord in person. He was a very handsome man, defined features and golden eyes that pierced any girl's heart.

This admiration, unfortunately, caused her to stare at him longer than normal, creating an awkward tension within the room. Beside her, Iroh cleared his throat, waking the girl from her trance on his nephew. She blushed furiously and bowed properly to the Fire Lord.

"Your Highness, my apologies, I wasn't expecting you this early," she whispered quickly attempting to cover her ogling with a valid reason, "I'm grateful that you have allowed me the opportunity to work on your home and make it something that you'll enjoy living within and celebrating for years to come." He smiled at her before turning to Iroh.

"It wasn't exactly my plan, as I said, the Dragon of the West is a very convincing man and deemed it necessary that since I was bringing a time of new, the Palace should reflect that." Iroh smirked.

"Please Fire Lord Zuko," Iroh said with a hint of snark in his voice, "I just couldn't bear to see you glare at the paintings of your father strewn everywhere and decided it was a time for change." Zuko blushed and sent a small glare at Iroh. "Plus, you're never going to woo any ladies with a Palace looking like this!" His statement caused (Y/N) to cover her mouth quickly and let out a giggle. Hearing the noise from her, Zuko's face burned darker, matching the Fire Nation red of his robes. "Anyway, my dear nephew, I must leave you at this time, you see it's nearly noon and I have a Pai Sho game to play with an old friend," he stepped back and bowed to both his nephew and (Y/N). "I'm sure you can take care of the rest of the tour and inform her on any changes you'd like. She's brilliant and really knows what she's doing so take everything she has to offer into account."

"Wait, you're not staying?" (Y/N) stopped him, nervously. Iroh smiled and shook his head.

"This isn't my home, it's his, he should be first hand in working with you. You're both smart and will definitely come up with something great together." Zuko's eyes were daggers as he looked at his Uncle. Iroh merely smirked before stepping away and back down the hallway she had originally met him in.

"I apologize for my Uncle, he's… eccentric, to say the least," the Fire Lord said with a frown. "I guess we should move on with the tour," he mumbled awkwardly before shuffling toward the room after the ballroom. The dining hall.

They traveled through the dining hall, the council chambers-as Zuko refused to call it the war room anymore, the spa rooms, a few bedrooms though they all looked the same according to the Fire Lord, several various hallways, where they finally ended, his bedroom.

(Y/N) had filled several parchments with notes and ideas for the Palace. She was already growing excited about the new plans and was ready to bring some life back into the Fire Nation's symbolic building.

"Not much needs to be done in here, to be honest, I don't use it for anything other than a place to sleep," he grumbled as he had essentially the entire tour. After Iroh had left, Zuko seemed unenthusiastic about showing her around and even less excited about her decorating anything.

"With all do respect, your Highness," she started, unable to bite her tongue this time, as she had the previous dozen times he said that he didn't need much done to the room, "that's a problem. Your bedroom should be a safe haven where you go to escape, especially with your job," her (Y/E/C) eyes narrowed in his direction, attempting to convey her seriousness about the situation. "This room is a comfort to you, not a grave to your father's previous sins." His single eyebrow cocked.

"With all do respect Miss…" it was then he realized he didn't know her name. Iroh had handled all the details, Zuko simply nodded his head and did as his uncle said.

"(Y/N)," she whispered somewhat defensively, ready for his retort.

"(Y/N)…" he repeated, "I have an escape in the Palace, though it may not be my bedroom like it seems to be for several of your clients, I can assure you, I'm not like them." He began to walk out of the bedroom, stopping only to turn back at her and nudge his head, signaling her to follow.

Confused, the decorator followed him back toward the ballroom and out into the garden. This view had caught her eye earlier when she was first in the ballroom with Iroh and now, finally getting a thorough look, she couldn't help but stare at the area in awe.

A large tree sat in the center of the zen place, a tiny pond full of quacking turtle ducks swimming happily within. Several other trees and flower bushes littered the area, with small fountains and statues around. It was serene and tranquil, calm seemed to wash over her instantly as she took in her surroundings, admiring the wonderful atmosphere that the garden provided.

Zuko led her toward the pond where he crouched down to rub the head of one of the turtle ducks with the back of his index finger. The duckling quacked and nuzzled closer to his touch instinctively. As the other turtle ducks saw this, they began swimming toward, looking for their own affection from the Fire Lord as well.

(Y/N) couldn't help but stare at the interaction before her, amazed at how the Fire Lord's demeanor changed rapidly. He seemed at peace and happy in this moment just spending time with ducklings in the garden.

"You see, miss (Y/N), while others escape to their bedrooms, I find myself coming here where I can be calm with my thoughts," he smirked up at her as he pat the last turtle duck on the head and then straightened up. With a sigh, she nodded her head, understanding what he meant now. "I do, however, agree, that my room needs more of a makeover than I initially suggested. You're welcome to do with it as you will, just make sure my belongings are taken care of properly." She looked up at him hopeful that he was okay with her being there.

Smiling, she moved toward the tree next to the pond and plopped down. It wasn't quite as ladylike as Zuko expected, like he had witnessed his mother, Mai, Azula, and Ty Lee do, but he couldn't help but smile and follow her lead, sitting down beside her. As she began handing him papers with notes, he watched as she animatedly talked about what she was going to do with each room and how it was supposed to make him feel more comfortable.

"For a Nation about light and the sun, your Palace has very little of it," she started, pointing at sketches she had apparently made as they walked of the different rooms, "I think removing the coverings on the windows and allowing more light to come in will be great. Plus, the sun makes Firebenders feel better, so why wouldn't they want more of it?" Zuko nodded, realizing that it made a lot of sense. "Then your people will be able to see you better instead of the dark shadow that Ozai assumingly was previous." Her casual use of his father's name seemed to shock him, but he didn't say anything and continued to listen. "If they see your face, they'll feel they can trust you more, you're not a bad man to look at either and that could possibly help you in the department General Iroh was requesting which was a new lady friend." She rushed through quickly.

Zuko held up his hand to stop her, "Contrary to what my uncle says, I don't need a woman to make me happy." He said, "I'm doing just fine all on my own." This caused her to stare at him for a few moments in deep thought and Zuko couldn't help but wonder what was going through her head. She seemed to be lost in herself for a moment before her vision returned and she realized she had been staring intently at the Fire Lord.

With a small shake of her head, she focused normally back on him, "I'm sorry, um… yes you're right, you don't need a woman, I was just trying to help." She mumbled before looking down at her papers awkwardly. Zuko handed her back the ones that he had been given and smiled.

"These look great (Y/N), why don't we start tomorrow on it? I will approve anything you want to do," he said trying to reassure the girl who had what felt like an emotional moment from his words.

"No, let me do this right, especially with the Palace. I will return with better sketches tomorrow and then if everything is approved I can bring in a team to start clearing out rooms. We'll do them one by one so you're not without the entire Palace for a couple of weeks," she said, watching as he stood up and held out his hand for her to take. Gently she pressed her palm to his and goosebumps ran up her arm at the shockingly warm contact. He smiled as he helped her to her feet, waiting several moments before leading her hand back to her side and slipping it from his grasp. "Thank you for this opportunity your Highness, you have no idea how excited I am to be able to help you feel like this is your home," she repeated her earlier sentiment with a long bow.

"Zuko," he said bluntly, causing her to look up at him from her bow. Her eyebrow cocked slightly and he couldn't help but smirk at the emotion written across her face. "Call me Zuko, none of this your Highness formality."

With reddened cheeks she smiled and nodded her head. He led her back into the ballroom and toward the entrance to the Palace. "Tomorrow then?" she asked as they reached the grand doorway.

"Tomorrow," he said, looking at her intently. "I'm interested to see what you bring me (Y/N)," he bowed to her.

She returned the bow with one final word for farewell, "Zuko." Her lips formed a smirk that Zuko couldn't stop his eyes from studying for as long as he could before she turned and made her way down the steps, internally wondering why this job made her feel all fuzzy inside.

I hope you guys liked it! Please let me know! Thanks!

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jobrookekarev · 3 years

Text

He's Wrapped Around Her Finger

Chapter: 1/1

Words: 3500

Summary: While Jo’s sleeping Alex gets to know his newborn daughter and settles into the role of Dad.

Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy.

Relationship: Alex Karev/Jo Wilson.

Characters: Alex Karev, Jo Wilson Karev, Helena Karev, and Meredith Grey.

Rating: General Audiences.

Additional Tags: Babies, Baby Care, Fluff, It’s so fluffy I'm going to die, Alex being a Dad, Alex and Jo being smitten with their daughter, Blood Mentioned.

Read at AO3

Read at FFN

AN: 3 fanfics in a week who is she! Also I had to Google what color the indicator line on diapers were because I remembered it was yellow at the start, but I didn't remember what color it would turn when it was wet so that how long it’s been since I changed a diaper.

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“Helena Meredith Karev born on November 26th at 5:36 am at 21 inches long and weighing at 8 lb 15 oz., just 1 oz short of 9 lb,” Alex announced as he spoke to Meredith on the phone.

“1 oz. short of 9 lb wow,” Meredith said in astonishment. “How's Jo recovering?”

“She's doing good. She and the baby are asleep right now.”

Alex looks over at the bassinet that was parked next to Jo's bed. Jo slept on her side with one hand in the bassinet on their daughter's chest. Jo’s abandonment issues had come up earlier and Alex noticed she was having a hard time letting Helena out of her sight. Her hand on Helena's chest in the bassinet was how Jo maintained contact with her daughter while getting some much needed rest.

“Good, now promise me you'll never tell Jo that her daughter almost weighed 9 lb. at birth,” Meredith insisted with a little laugh.

“What? Why not?” Alex said confused as he looked over the little note card posted on Helena's bassinet that listed her weight and other details. “Jo knows how much she weighs.”

“Yeah, Jo knows Helena weighs 8 lb. and 15 oz., but when you say she almost weighs 9 lb it isn’t the same thing. Thinking of your baby as 8 lb vs 9 lb is different. No woman likes to be remembered how big their baby was and how hard it was to push them out unless you want Helena to be an only child.”

“Okay, I promise to say she weighs 8 lb. and 14oz. whenever Jo asks,” Alex said rolling his eyes at Meredith as he watched Jo shift in her sleep so her legs were more apart.

Watching Jo be in excruciating amounts of pain as she labored was hard for him, but he pushed it aside to be there to support his wife. Jo’s pain was to the point of which she was completely out of it, just going through the motions as she pushed their daughter into the world. Alex had watched quite a few women give birth, but it was different because it was Jo. He loved her and he hated seeing her in pain knowing that he had partially caused it.

When they had discussed having kids, Alex knew it would include a painful labor and that it would be hard on Jo and her body. Despite her training as an OB and numerous birth classes they had gone to, Jo didn't realize she was in labor until she was in active labor and they had to rush to the hospital. Alex knew that because of this experience Jo may not want to get pregnant again. If that was her decision, he would abide by it. Alex was happy because he was so absolutely content with the little girl in front of him.

“Congratulations, Alex,” Meredith said, breaking him out of his thoughts.

“You said that already,” Alex said although he didn't mind hearing it again.

“Yeah well, I'm going to say it again. Have you texted Cristina yet?”

“No, not yet and we haven't talked to too many people, apart from the video call earlier, I’ve just talked to you and my mom. It's hard to find the time. I just keep staring at her, and thank you Meredith for everything.”

“You mean for waking you up so you didn't miss your wife's labor, you're welcome.”

“Yeah that especially,” Alex said as he couldn't help but chuckle as he remembered the chaotic events of that morning. “I'll talk to you later, bye”

“Bye.”

Alex put away his phone and settled into the uncomfortable chair next to Jo’s bed. He thought that they'd make these chairs more comfortable considering that most second parents and family members usually ended up spending the night there, but apparently not. He would have to check the budget and see if they could upgrade the chairs. Despite how he was no longer the chief of surgery, Alex learned a lot, and he still occasionally found himself reverting to taking care of the business side of the hospital. Alex shuffled around trying to get comfortable but clearly, he was not sleeping in this chair that afternoon.

Alex watched over his girl. He smiled at the thought, his girls, he had a daughter. He had a child of his own and oh how he was in love with her. Helena squealed in the bassinet throwing her arms around and Alex was up in an instant. Her tiny face squished even further as she let out a single cry. Jo stirred next to her and he felt like he was in the middle of a complicated surgery.

Alex was quick to slip his hand under Helena as he took Jo's hand and put it next to her. He was cautious so as not to wake his sleeping wife and let her get the rest she deserved while also soothing their newborn. As soon as he put down Jo's hand and moved to cradle Helena, he stopped for a moment. Jo sighed but didn't move or wake up and he looked down at Helena who cried out again. Helena spread out her arms and continued to fuss. After a certain number of years, soothing babies became instinctual and Alex started to sway and shush.

“Shh, Shh, it's okay, Daddy's got you.” Alex smiled down at her as she stopped fussing and opened her eyes to look up at him.

Helena studied him for a moment, staring into his soul in the way only a baby could before she decided this wasn't what she wanted, and cried out again in that little uh fussy cry.

“Okay, okay,” Alex said, he looked back to the chair before he sat down and laid Helena on his knees. He undid the blanket intending to redo it into a proper swaddle. “Oh, I see what it is.”

Alex saw the full diaper and the blue line that indicated she had her first wet diaper. He was weirdly proud about it especially as it meant that her kidneys were functioning well and she was hydrated. “Okay, give me a second.”

Alex cradled her close to his chest as he got up and walked over to the drawers where they kept wipes and diapers. He got the supplies and went over to the changing table in the bathroom. He propped the door open in case Jo woke up as he didn't want her to panic when they were gone and got the changing table open.

“You know, I promised your mom I’d do all of these diaper changes since she carried you for nine months, basically built you from scratch, and just now endured quite a few hours of labor with you. She wanted an epidural you know, but she didn’t realize she was in labor. You gotta remind me to tease her about that later, but not until after her stitches heal, and you were eager to get here too huh?” Alex said to Helena as she continued to fuss a little bit more as he quickly changed her and got her settled in a fresh diaper.

Alex staring down at her as he pulled down the onesie Jo had put on her. He knew Jo like the ‘little turkey’ onesie, but it had buttons and buttons were always a struggle, even for a seasoned Ped’s doctor like he was. Alex resisted the urge to grab the other baby gown or even the one with the zippers as he finally did the last button.

“There we go, are we happy now?” Alex asked, Helena looked around and was content and wiggled around. He wrapped her up into a proper swaddle before he picked her up again, but she looked up at him and then cried out again, still not happy. “I know, I am not-mom right now aren't I.”

Alex quietly talked to her as he settled her in his arms and walked back into the room. He sat down in the recliner and started to rock back and forth. “I'm not-Mom. I'm not what you want, I know, we don't know each other yet, although you might recognize my voice. I've read you lots of stories while you were still in your mommy's belly. I even did a little bit of singing too, but don't tell anyone around here that.”

Alex settled into the movement of the chair as he looked down at Helena. She had stopped fussing and stared up at him again, seeming to take him in as she listened to his voice and he took that as a cue to continue.

“I guess now would be the proper time for an introduction. I'm your dad, most people call me Alex or Dr. Karev around here at the hospital. Your mom calls me Alex too, but she drags it out a little in a way that's pretty adorable. Your Aunt Cristina is going to call me Evil Spawn and your Auntie Mare might do it too. You've met her already, although you probably didn't notice. She was on the video called when you were born, but I remember how you and your mom only had eyes for each other. Your mom and I, we don't have a big bio family, but we do have lots of friends and they're our family. They all love you so much already, especially your cousin Ellis.”

Alex rambled off to her as Helena just watched him, and he took in his daughter. He never really saw familiar features in newborns. They always just looked similar, like babies and not much else. The features really didn’t come in until they were a little older and then you could say they look like one parent or the other. Yet, as Alex looked down at Helena he saw his chin and his crooked lips in the way that she frowned as she cried. She looked like Jo too, she had Jo’s cute little cheeks and her eyes. Although she looked like an even mix of them now, he could tell that she was going to be a little tiny Jo running around their house. They joked about how they'd never be able to say no to their kid, and Alex knew that with just one look from Helena and he would melt like snow in the sun. His daughter would always be the bright spot in his day.

Helena's eyes started to droop, but she would occasionally blink them open. As if she was fighting sleep as much as Jo did. “You are already so much like your mother. She does that same thing too, you know. When we watch movies on the couch with Reese's, you haven't met him yet and he just knows you as the thing that keeps him from sitting on Mommy's lap. It might be a while before you two become friends, but you’ll like him too.”

Alex rocked her as she fell asleep in his arms and it made him feel some weird sense of accomplishment because his kid fell asleep in his arms. He knew from experience that getting a baby back to sleep was no easy feat. He continued to hold her, not ready to put her back down again. He wasn't sure if he'd ever be ready to put her down and he knew why Jo was hesitant to do so as well. He just sat there and rocked his daughter and held her and patted her back.

“Anyway, Saturday nights are movie nights and your Mommy always curls up in my lap and puts her head on my chest. She always says she'll stay up and watch the whole movie,” Alex said as he leaned closer to whisper to Helena. “But she never does.”

“That's not true,” Jo whispered and Alex looked up to see her smile from where she was curled up in bed.

She must have been watching them for a little while and he smiled back at her. A sense of relief filled his mind as she had woken up without panicking for the first time and he tried to remain calm as he smiled back at her.

“It is true, you always fall asleep just, like clockwork before the end credits.”

“I didn't fall asleep when we watched that one really bad horror movie.”

“Yeah because it scared the crap out of you. I had to turn it off because you started crying.”

“No, we had to turn it off because Reeses wouldn't stop barking at it.”

“Okay Princess,” Alex said, smiling as she raised her eyebrows at him and he chuckled as he got up and walked over to sit on her bed. The second he sat down Jo reached out, and he thought she was going to take Helena, but instead, she smacked the side of his arm. “Hey, I've got precious cargo here.”

“She’s fine and you can't use our daughter as a shield to protect you against my wrath,” Jo teased with a smirk of her own. She carefully sat up and Alex's smile faded as she grimaced when she moved.

“Is your ice pack still cold? Do you want me to get you a new one or something?”

“No, I think I bled through the pad again.”

Jo pulled back the blankets and he was relieved to see that there were no bloodstains on the sheets. Jo carefully got up out of bed and Alex put Helena down in the bassinet.

“No, just hold her, I’ll be fine,” Jo said, waving him off.

“Jo, let me take care of you,” Alex insisted as he watched Helena for a second to see if she’d fuss before he went over to help his wife.

Alex put his arm around her and grabbed the IV pole as they took small and wide steps over to the bathroom. Jo let go of his waist as she stepped into the bathroom and grabbed the peri bottle and her other supplies. Alex got out a new ice pad and activated it, shaking it up before he felt it cool in his hand. He handed it to her before she waved him off again.

“Just let me help you, Jo. I know it hurts you to whip and…”

“Alex,” Jo said, slightly annoyed as she cut him off. “You can change our daughter's diapers, not mine. I got this.”

“Are you sure, because honestly, I don't mind,” Alex argued, he wasn't sure how much she would let him take care of her, but he wanted to do this for her. If she let them.

“Alex, today multiple people, several of whom are my coworkers, have seen me naked on a bed pushing out a baby. I need a moment of privacy,” Jo said, holding her hand out to block him from coming close.

Alex nodded and took a step back. He made a big thing about covering his eyes and turned around to go back out into the room, bumping into the doorway as Jo laughed behind him. He smiled as it didn't hurt that much and hearing her laugh after her tears earlier felt good. Alex rubbed his forehead as he went back into the room and picked up Helena again, knowing Jo would want to hold her the second she was back in bed.

Alex looked down at her and smiled, completely smitten. From the moment Jo told him she was pregnant, he was over the moon. He had seen how parents had fallen in love with their child and he felt that love the moment Jo was pregnant. The moment Carina had placed their daughter on Jo’s chest. It was like his heart burst with love and happiness. It was so overwhelming and utterly consuming. He loved his daughter more than he could describe.

He had taken care of babies his entire life. His mom had started to slip just after Amber turned one so the majority of her care fell to him. He practically raised Amber and Aaron until they were all put in foster care. After Amber got sick and had to go to the hospital and the state finally stepped in. After that, he took care of his mom throughout high school and college up until the day he got the job and flew out to the then Seattle Grace Hospital. Even then he sent money and hired someone to check on her. When it came to his career, he wanted to go into plastics, but somehow he ended up in Peds and he was good there.

He took care of thousands of babies over the years and in caring for them he loved them. Alex watched their parents love them more than anything in the world, and he got a bit of that love when it came to Meredith’s kids. They were his nieces and nephew and he loved them like they were his own because they were family, but he still didn't experience the kind of love a parent had for their child, until the moment his child was there. It was all he could think about. She was all-consuming in a way that he could just stare at her for hours.

It wasn't until he really succeeded at being a Peds doctor that he knew he could be a dad. Even though it still terrified him. Every injured kid that walked through the door he could see being his kid. He went home to Jo and put his hands on her belly and he worried. Alex worried about all the possible complications, diseases, and injuries that their kids could get. Even now staring down at her, he knew she was perfect. Her APGAR score was a 10, she had good reflexes, and she was eating and wetting her diapers, and she was perfect, but he still worried. He was so lost in thought that he even noticed Jo had come up behind him until she pressed up against him and they stared down at their daughter.

“She's perfect, Alex,” Jo whispered to him, kissing his cheek. She had always been able to since his worries.

“Yeah, she is,” Alex said as he put his arm around her as they both stared at Helena completely in awe of their daughter.

Jo moved to get back in bed and Alex helped her up, despite how she protested. After she was settled, Alex placed Helena in her arms before Jo could even ask.

“Thank you,” Jo whispered, cradling her close.

They both continued to stare down at her and Alex sat back down in the chair and scooted closer to their bedside. Helena’s little eyes fluttered open, but she didn't cry as she stared up at Jo who smiled down at her. Completely smitten as well.

“Yeah, that’s Mommy isn’t it,” Alex said reaching out and putting his hand on Jo’s knee. Jo didn't even glance up at him, she just smiled down at Helena.

In the past nine months, he had watched Jo go through so many emotions, as he watched her become a mother. Everything she did was to care for their daughter. He knew that Jo was terrified about becoming a mom when they first started talking about kids years ago. She knew the heartache of a bad childhood because she lived it. She was terrified of her genes and she wanted a career first so he waited patiently for her to be ready.

Watching her with their daughter in just the past few hours Alex thought she was the best mom in the world, although he might be a little biased. Jo was so good with her, the second Helena fussed or cried, Jo would pick her up. She was so attentive to their daughter and so loving, Alex couldn't help but just watch them together.

“Daddy is staring at us,” Jo giggled as she looked up and caught him.

Alex smiled completely unashamed. “What can I say, I'm awestruck by the two beautiful girls in front of me, my girls.”

“Your girls,” Jo smiled before she realized something and giggled. “Alex Karev has a daughter.”

“Oh God,” Alex said, putting a hand over his face as he realized the karmic payback that was coming to him.

“With your luck, she’ll probably be crazy for whatever gender she ends up liking,” Jo laughed putting her hand on his arm as the color drained from his face.

“No, no, she is a baby. We're not talking about this,” Alex said, shaking his head.

“She's not going to be a baby forever,” Jo said as she tilted her head and smiled at him, clearly enjoying torturing him.

“No, but she is a baby right now, a newborn and she's going to stay that way,” Alex said looking down at Helena and rubbing her little cheek.

Jo giggled again as she leaned forward and reached her hand out to wrap around his neck and pull in for a kiss. Alex let himself linger on Jo's lips as she smiled against his lips. Helena squealed and they parted with a laugh as they looked down at their daughter who stared up at Jo. Jo traced her finger down Helena’s cheek as she rocked her and Alex smiled at his girls. Yeah, this was perfect.

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AN: On a scale of 1 to 10 how much did this turn you into a pile of mush?

#jo wilson #alex karev #jolex #grey's anatomy #meredith grey #grey's anatomy fanfic #otp: home and heart #my writing #my work #my fanfiction

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steve0discusses · 4 years

Text

Yugioh Ep33 S4 pt 2: The Best Storyboarder Came Back Just so They Could Draw Tristan Getting Hit in the Nuts

OK lets just get to the good stuff.

God bless you, storyboarder.

(read more under the cut)

The team has entered the Atlantis lair of Dartz, which is also accessible through Paradius in San Fransisco, but youknow...we don’t have magic so it’s not like we could’ve skipped like 10 minutes and just done that instead of the helicopter escape, the Military moment, and the ride through a hurricane.

Oh wait, we do have magic, that’s right...well...for now, pretend we don’t.

Enjoy the snakes.

Strangely, Kaiba does not feel comfortable with the snakes, when snakes really just a smaller and cuter dragon. I love snakes. Never owned one...but I trust em.

Dartz has the Yugioh “old guy” aesthetic of “We just really like yellowed sandstone”

I get that they want this place (and also Yami’s house) to look like a tomb so there won’t be any paint on the wall but this is just a pet peeve of mine that Ancient times freakin loved garish colors on the wall in layers and layers of patterns and yet in fiction we never show that.

But...it doesn’t go with the vibe. I’ll let it go because it would absolutely ruin the vibe to have a bunch of swirly stuff in neon orange and green.

Before we have a chance to grab a step stool and just kinda yoink Yugi Muto, Dartz shows up, and this shot happens.

I couldn’t not grab a cap of that. I mean...look at it. It is SO HARD to foreshorten hands so it looks right and then bam they just did that. It’s just...

...I’ve been breaking down foreshortening in Yugioh shots for a while now trying to figure out why when I do it, it looks like a busted huge hand, but when they do it, it looks really good, and I’m starting to realize that maybe it’s more than just stacking but also...the composition?

You can’t really look at this picture as a whole. The hand is such a strong focal point that you must start there, and then follow down the arm to the face. I think when I do these foreshortening shots I make the hand the same weight as the face, and that’s my downfall. You gotta let the composition force the viewer to slow down and take time in order for the optical illusion to happen...maybe? I’m like over 30 now, you’d think I’d figure this out by now.

Whatever, that’s another post.

So like...what happened to those two people who used to be there????

And now prepare thyself for my lazy math. I know this math is bad. For people out there who feel like working out the geometric growth and calculate just how many souls Dartz slurps up--feel free to tell me. If I like the explanation, I will adjust the Death Count to match it. It’s just too 2020 for me to do more than multiplication at the moment.

Did I count how many people would have existed 10,000 years ago? no. Did I account for plagues? No. Like this math of 4 a day is bad...but eh it’s all I got right now in my mental ammunition.

Something that we did think about was...

Why not slurp up the Pharaoh soul when Yami was still alive? Like we assume the puzzle existed in the past but like...did Yami not get superpowered until Yugi woke him up? Was he in fact useless until he got a little bit of a battery charge during Season Zero when he was dumping people off of bell towers?

And like I get not knowing about the underground Ishtars, and not being able to get a hold of Shadi because Shadi is a lazy ghost, but Bakura was RIGHT THERE. You can’t munch up Pegasus off screen and then say “eh but Bakura’s kinda low tier” we know for a fact that Bakura is not...so like...there must have been some copyright situation where they couldn’t use certain characters. This is a filler arc--but it would have been nice to have at least some explanation as to why it took Dartz so long to finally murder the hell out of Pharaoh.

Which is me expecting way too much out of this show. Just something I was really hoping would get addressed but leave it for the headcanon.

It’s at this point that Mokuba realized he’s standing on top of people.

A crypt made out of human souls! Crazy, usually we’re in a crypt made out of one single human soul....and both of these crypts have Yugi in it.

In Raphael’s storyline, he’s been busy just cleaning up after everyone else. It’s supposed to come off as very serious but I was totally busting up when he’s just dropping bodies into the back of this jeep.

And in the Kaiba Corp plotline, Roland is anxiously wondering if he should be a Dad and save the kids or if he should be a dog and stay in the plane.

He stays in the plane.

Strangely this was the right call. (And this is why Roland has never died)

So they start throwing around cards, as you do, and Dartz puts down his Orichalcos, has he does, when suddenly...they started seeing stuff again. Can’t have a single card game without it.

So the Orichalcos is just a backstory device? For reals?

Something I alluded to quite a few episodes back with Valon was just...wondering why the hell the Orichalcos crew had so much freakin magic as to make all these visions during duels. Turns out...it’s just a thing to occasionally trip on Oricalchos juice. I’m not sure why we never had a vision with Mai, Weevil, Rex, or Gurimo, but at least we now know that Raphael and Valon weren’t as magical as I thought they were.

So we’re in like...outer space. Kind of the last place you’d expect out of ancient Atlantis and Dartz isn’t having ANY OF IT.

And honestly that makes sense. Imagine giving someone 10,000 years ago the run down on outer space. They’d freak. They’d definitely think you’re talking about demons.

If space is an elaborate analogy, we don’t know that yet. For how this is presented, it’s just an old man hootin and hollerin about how much space sucks, and I love that.

PS how anime is this shot of the earth behind the orichalcos symbol and the dude in the middle with the ass length blue hair--really damn anime, right?

Like at least one of you has this wall hanging, right?

For those that are too tired to look it up, Pangea was 280-230 million years ago.

THAT REALLY CHANGES MY MATH.

AND I’M TOO TIRED.

So my thoughts are...either the math is wrong and I’ll fix it eventually in post, depending on my mood come next Wednesday, OR...humanity was deleted and then came back later??? (because the dawn of mankind was 7 million years ago)

OR...

They just felt like drawing Pangea 10 million years ago. Maybe that’s all. Maybe I don’t have to fix anything. I dunno.

Maybe this isn’t Earth.

Maybe Yugioh Earth never had Loma Preita because it isn’t actually Earth. And, like a Final Fantasy situation, is a second planet on a parallel plane of our own?

Either way, I’m not redoing the math because I actually don’t know how to change it anymore. I’m v undecided of the timeline now......maybe the next episode will tell us more? (I doubt this very much)

RIP deathcount.

Yo Atlantis!

I have a lot of questions!

About Atlantis!

And the purpose of the aqueduct going the wrong direction.

Is that in fact the poop shoot?

But wtv it looks neat.

So anyway, that’s all for now, I hope you enjoyed my bad math, and I hope you enjoy your Halloween. Ours is a whole lot of nothing. I’ll be watching lots of Phasmaphobia streams while eating Butterfingers that I legally can’t give to children because it’s an epidemic (butterfingers is like the last candy that my old 30 yo ass can handle without passing out or gagging. Weird how getting older makes me hate all the good things I couldn’t eat when I was younger because I was too young to be allowed to eat them.) and that’s about it.

WHY did Halloween finally fall on a Saturday DURING an epidemic? I only get so many Saturday Halloweens in my youth...just why.

(and here’s a link to read these in chrono order)

#ygo #yugioh #recap #photo recap #humor #atlantis #yami #seto kaiba #mokuba #dartz #tristan taylor #getting hit in the nuts #roland #hallucinating while playing cards who knew?#S4 #Ep33

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inevitably-johnlocked · 4 years

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hey steph! how long would you say you spent on sorting out fic recs and tagging them and all that stuff? just curious because i really wanna start a fic rec blog too

Hey Nonny!

UGGGHHHH Tumblr deleted my entire response, so I’m going to just jot out what I remember.

Depending upon how long you’re willing to spend, a LONG time. You guys have NO idea how much work it is, and how much off-tumblr time I spend doing it. When I keep saying “it’s a full time job” it really is. The blogging you guys actually see takes about 2 hours, from filing my blog to answering a few asks here and there, but the rest is ALL filing my fics and creating lists.

Now, mine is “perfected to my liking” after two years of trial and error and headaches, but yeah, if you’re serious about becoming strictly a fic rec blog, prepare to put in a lot of time and effort. BUT to be fair, I’m ridiculous in my sorting and organizing... I have a weird OCD thing where I need stuff sorted in a certain way, and it takes longer than it probably should. But it works for me and it has become very streamlined now that almost all of my Ao3 bookmarks are finally sorted. In the beginning, when I decided I would start reccing fics, it was only meant to be a here and there thing, but then people kept coming to me more and more and that’s when I decided I needed to keep an offline list. So here’s some tips from me to you:

Keep offline lists. Tumblr fucks up enough that you WILL lose interest in redoing a big 50-fic list if tumblr decides that nope, today I don’t feel like posting your file because you didn’t refresh your page BEFORE typing it out.

Going along with the above, keep an offline masterlist of your read-and-tagged fics. All the recs I give you guys? They’re all on one of three list masterlists I have offline: GO Recs, FFNet Recs, and Ao3 Recs. This will be SO much easier for searching for topics when making new lists.

Do the lists WAY ahead of time. This has given me back many-a-Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday nights because I prep my lists ahead of time.

Develop the “public” system of filing for your things, and use that for your Masterlist, so you don’t have to redo it every time (so like don’t have just Ficname by author if that’s not what you want to do for your recs). For example, my system is this, emphasis included: Fic Name by Author (Rating, wordcount, Chapter count || WIP/AU if applicable || PODFIC LINK if applicable || list of personal and/or author tags here, even if they spoil the story; i’ve found some people with triggers appreciate that I tag EVERYTHING I find in the stories) – Author’s description or personal description if there isn’t one. Series link if it’s part of one. This way, all I have to do is copy-paste it into new documents for each list, and then copy-paste the whole list into the Tumblr doc.

Also, re: the above, do the layout in Tumblr if you’re doing a Tumblr rec blog. It keeps the formatting consistent and I don’t have to fix it between Ao3 and FFnet if I just copy-paste everything into a blank Tumblr doc, and then copy paste THAT onto the masterlist. Trust me on this one.

Draft everything. This goes along with all the above. I always “start” a list and put a big header so that I can find it in my drafts (that’s why they have the big bold H1 headers on them) and then hit “draft”. Then keep a list of your drafted fics in your preferred method of organization. I keep everything in Text Edit RTF files. I believe Alexx told me once she did spreadsheets. Either way, develop a system BEFORE jumping into this thing, because you will EASILY get overwhelmed if you aren’t used to high-stress levels.

Tag fics as you read them. Trust me on this one. Because it will save you MONTHS of re-reading every single bookmark so you can properly file fics. I do this on my Notes App with the story title, and then all the tags I know are popular requests or are for lists I know Nonnies have asked for.

Keep CONSISTENT in your tags. Don’t tag one thing O!verse but another Omegaverse. I had to redo a lot of my older tags because CMD+F was pointless on a document I purposely made to streamline the process.

USE Ao3′s TAGGING FEATURE for your bookmarks. Just make sure that if any of your tags are spoilerific, make sure you keep the rec private.

File EVERYTHING as soon as you bookmark it. It will save you a LOT of hours of going through all your recent bookmarks to file them.

That said, HAVE A FILING SYSTEM if you’re keeping everything offline. Keep separate documents for each list... Trust me on this. I used to just have one document each for Fluff fics, for example, and put subheaders in them, and it just got messy and annoying as my fic reccing became more common and plentiful. Instead, have a nice list like this, for instance:

The grey dots next to some of them are old filing methods that I need to fix and pull out. Also, as you can see, every time I finish a list, I file it into Posted and start a new list appended with a Pt number. It just keeps the system moving smoothly. I also have a system for the coloured dots; Grey is Old and refile, Orange is drafted on Tumblr, and Orange and Green means it’s drafted and ready-to-post.

I also have an offline “drafted posts document”:

That also has a system as you can see, but it keeps me knowing what I’ve already got drafted on Tumblr if I forget to tag the files with the colour dots.

It looks tedious and complicated, but I promise you, it’s really simple once you’re familiar with my method. Which is why I’m saying, you need to develop this kind of system REALLY early rather than 2 years later like I did. This drafted posts list is only recent as of... February I believe is when I started it.

Hmmm. Ah, yeah, so you can see it’s a lot of work, and this is why I absolutely dislike HateAnons negatively criticizing my lists, because it IS a lot of MY free time, between 8 and 48 hours a week. But if you truly enjoy sorting and organizing like I do, it’s a bit easier to cope with. So, yeah, whenever I tell you guys “I need some time away” this is why, and usually I switch to playing video games or doing art, both of which I miss doing on the weekends. I’m trying to keep the Tumblr stuff to mostly Weeknights these days, so that it’s an extension of my day job. Funny how I have less free time working at home than I did when I wasn’t; because I feel obligated to always be on my computer now, and I hate that. Like right now, I just bought 2 new games to play and I haven’t tried them yet because I’m always working both day-job stuff AND Tumblr stuff on weekends.

So yes, that’s another tip: Don’t let it consume you, and set a schedule. Don’t feel obligated to answer every request. When I am tired and I just genuinely don’t have the energy to dig through 1000+ fics to find 2 or three for an obscure ask, I usually make it an interactive ask – not only does it encourage community involvement and a sense of belonging for everyone, but I also discover new fics to read too! I am IMMENSELY proud and happy that my fic lists have essentially become “fic exchange” grounds. Before it was only on one or two lists, some timid new authors added their fics to my big lists, but now, since people SEE that I add their fics hidden in the notes to the main post, now everyone is happy to share their faves on the main lists AS WELL AS the smaller single asks. I like to think of myself of a “curator of happy things” so that’s what I like to do with these.

That said, you have to also decide if you’re going to be this interactive as well. Because that adds an ADDITIONAL hour or so as you make a separate “MFL” document and file those too. It’s time consuming, but totally worth it because if I’ve read the fic, all I have to do to that post in my MFL list is add my tags and file that block of text :)

I hope I helped you out a bit, Nonny, and I hope you guys enjoyed seeing a bit of my process. If I can get OBS to work on my laptop, maybe I’ll do a short video so you guys can see me doing it live.

Anyway, sorry this got long. :P

#steph replies #johnlock fic recs #about me #my blog #tutorials #my advice

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goldeneyedgirl · 4 years

Text

TwiFicMas2020 Day 1: Anathema

It’s that time of year again - when I bombard you with fic I’ve written over the year and haven’t posted, whether it is an outtake, part of a WIP, or something that ended up going sideways but still had some cool bits I was proud of.

Everything will be tracked under the ‘TwiFicMas2020′ and ‘FicMas2020′ tags. Most fics are incomplete scenes - “--” is a scene break, “//” means that there’s a cut - it’s probably not yet written.

First up is Anathema, the fourth or fifth attempt at the ‘Alice works in a mortuary/funeral home’ idea that refuses to solidify itself - though I think I’m getting closer. I enjoy the idea that Charlie Swan is in on Forks’ secrets (before Jacob strips in front of him, lol) and I am always here for the supernatural world being more than just vampires and shifters.

I hope you enjoy and thank you for reading!

The day the Cullens arrive in Forks, two things happen.

The first, I draw both Death, and the Wheel of Fortune. A combination that, frankly, sounds time-consuming. I lie in bed and contemplate them for awhile. The cards are soft, from lifetimes of passing from hand to hand (my dearest and most beloved Great-Aunt Jeanne passed this set to me when she died. At the time, I was too young to understand the true gift in cards that had never before been touched by Brandon hands - before mine.) The cards are illustrated so carefully, so detailed. They smell like dried lavender and the scrap of linen that I wrap them in, and there is something so reassuring about each and every card.

I draw my cards every few days before I get up. I find it calming, the shuffle of them against my fingers, as I let my dreams fade. It’s a quiet time, and one I savour.

Eventually, I do have to get up, though. No rest for the wicked. The cards go back into the wooden jewellery box some young man carved for some young woman in Jeanie’s family long before I was even a glimpse of a thought, and back into my nightstand drawer.

I - we - live on the first floor of the Brandon Funeral Home, a perfectly respectable converted Georgian house at the end of Main Street, where it sweeps around to Cedar Road. It’s a shit place to have a corner, and more than once speed racers have spun out; whoever’s scraped off the road and our front walk usually end up in the freezers in the basement.

But I digress.

Breakfast is mundane. Dulcie is there, hair in curlers, and a frown on her face when she realises I am not dressed. I sit crosslegged across two thrift-store chairs in my camisole and booty shorts, spooning jam onto toast with the precision of a good scientist and ignore her reminding me of my dressing gown (a sturdy pink-flower print flannel that is buried in my closet. My preferred robe, a thin grey kimono, is currently in my laundry pile) and ‘common decency’, as if my elderly great-uncle is looking to leer at the decided lack of anything I have up north or down south.

Dulcie is… Dulcie. No replacement for Aunt Jeanie, but a good woman. I find it funny that Uncle Freddie is an old man now, and he still reels ‘em in. Or he would if Jeanie’s death hadn’t broken, shattered, and wrecked him. Dulcie worked for us for a few years before she set her eyes on the top bedroom and changing ‘Dulcie Dunn-Stanley’ to ‘Dulcie Brandon’.

Oh, that sounds very jaded. It’s mutual, Freddie and Dulcie. Their courtship was glacial and it’s really only recently that Dulcie’s been hinting about heading to the court house. And, honestly, whatever makes Uncle Freddie happy. Dulcie’s kind to me, we mostly get along, and her attempts to mother me are so far inconsistent - but she is usually pretty respectful.

My uncle lingers over his food; he’s got a new book open at his elbow, and no one can pry my uncle away from his books. They’re usually hardcover, non-fiction. Most of the boxes stored in the third floor are my uncles books.

After breakfast, I am banished to get dressed for work, which is in the basement today, where I am to be the hands as we prepare one Lewis Fletcher for his Saturday morning funeral. There’s a sack of bagged organs resting in the chest cavity, from the autopsy (elk or deer attack, the report says), and I get to stitch Lewis back together, get to fill him full of chemicals, seal things with putty, and get to face painting. The Fletchers are a pretty ordinary family locally, and the service will be simple - they were very agreeable when Freddie met with them last week.

I put my music on and hum as I prepare my kit. It’s no secret that an unqualified teenage girl doing this work probably breaks a lot of laws, but Freddie’s hands aren’t as steady as they used to be, and he’s old enough to remember when a family business meant that the younger generation was trained by the older at home, no degrees or certifications necessary.

Sometimes I wonder what Jeanie would have thought, me working down here like this. Would she have understood? Would she have been mad or upset or disappointed?

We’ll never know.

Freddie fetches us both a cup of tea, and hovers at my shoulder as I piece together Mr Fletcher’s chest cavity.

“Smaller stitches, Alice,” Freddie says, inspecting my work carefully. “Redo that section, stitch closer together, and small stitches.”

I nod, turning around to grab a scalpel from the tray beside me to cut the wonky stitches free and start again, and I freeze as the ice-cold feeling envelopes me. No, no, no it’s been so long…

For a moment, I am unfixed in time and space. I am still in the basement, with the buzzing fluorescent lights, and smooth metal drawers and cupboards, the stink of formaldehyde. But instead of a clean, bare second table, I am lying there. But I’m not dead, and I’m not alone. It’s him. The boy - man? - I’ve been seeing for so long, in visions and dreams. He’s hovering above me, a veritable sculpture of pale flesh as he peels off his shirt, our mouths still fused together, my hands gripping his hips. I am a much less collected figure, with my tights around my knees, one shoe still on and my shirt hiked up over my bra. Vision-Me pulls away to say something, and He laughs, and it’s then the light catches his eyes. Dark gold.

Golden-eyes.

“Oh fuck,” Real-Me says, and somehow Vision-Him knows I’m Seeing and looks right at me, where I’m standing with a scalpel in my hand.

“Alice?” My uncle’s hand on my shoulders brings me right back to the right point in time and space.

It’s at the point I hit the floor, manage to stab myself quite viciously with the scalpel and my uncle starts cussing.

It’s been a while between visions.

The Council was basically the reason Freddie and I stayed in Forks. It was a fifty-fifty split between honouring Jeanie’s wishes, and keeping me safe and out of sight - as if my aspirations were towards a Vegas nightclub act or international pop star. I wasn’t entirely clueless.

Forks was built in a special place. A place where the barriers between the ordinary and the extraordinary were a little thinner, where the supernatural were drawn to. Jeanie had theorised that was why the Quileute were able to tap into their spirit wolves so easily, and why the gene remained so strong, father to son without a constant presence of their enemies. I didn’t know enough of their history to have an opinion, but Forks was definitely a place with an interesting history that very few people knew - even I only knew a fraction of everything that happened, past and present. There were very few written accounts; most of the histories were oral and passed down on a strict need-to-know basis.

The Council were definitely in the know, and had been for generations. There was Billy Black, Sue and Harry Clearwater representing the Quileute tribe, there was Charlie Swan representing Forks and everyone not in the know, and there was Freddie and I. Freddie, was technically Jeanie’s representative, and was the Mediator between the Ordinary and the Others. Jeanie’s family had been Mediators for generations, but she’d never had children, so all of that had somehow fallen onto Freddie - and me.

It was extremely useful to have the Police Chief and a Mortician working the Council - we’d had to fudge more than a few deaths. There was always someone or something passing through the Olympic Peninsula, and we’d negotiated, challenged, threatened, and banished more than a few creatures over the last few years.

Technically, all parties were allowed to bring their apprentice representative, but I was the only one of the next generation who attended. Charlie Swan had made it clear he didn’t want his daughter involved in any of this, and both Billy and the Clearwaters had decided that their kids were too young to know exactly what went on around here. I figured in a decade or so, it would just be me, Seth, and Jacob Black (no way would Leah hang around just for this shit show), drinking beer in the woods and deciding whether to burn or bury.

But tonight’s meeting was Special. Despite the fact I’d been drawing nonsensical cards for days now - the Star, the Tower, and Justice - no visions had appeared beyond a dream about a locket with ‘W’ engraved on it. I’d expected a fairly normal meeting, until Freddie had let me in on the plan - we were, apparently, meeting with the Cullen family. No one had informed me exactly what or who the Cullens were, only that they had a ‘fourth seat’ in the Council that they’d been entitled to since the ‘30s. I’d have to go through Jeanie’s diaries again - there were boxes of them in storage, and Jeanie had useful tidbits dotted throughout.

So that was why I was in the forest with my grandfather, shivering underneath two coats and in my new fleecy boots, standing around a fire pit that didn’t really do much more than illuminate the burning wood; the lanterns we’d brought were more effective.

Some days I really wished Leah or Seth or Jacob Black would attend these meetings; they’d certainly liven up these meetings a bit.

“They’ll be here soon,” Billy Black said grimly. Billy Black had it worse than the rest of us - getting out to this part of the forest was awkward and time-consuming with his wheelchair. Since these meetings were clandestine, we couldn’t build a proper track.

“The terms are staying the same?” Charlie asked, sipping from a paper cup of coffee Sue had pressed on him.

Billy frowned. “We aren’t here to renegotiate, but we will listen to their petition if they have one,” he said finally.

“What are the existing terms?” I asked, nudging a mossy rock with my toe.

“We’ll go over that later on, Alice,” Freddie said, watching the woods carefully.

Fine, obstruct my completely transparent attempt at finding out what was actually going on. I was definitely intrigued by the idea this clan had a ‘seat’ at the Council, but it involve negotiations? The only creature I could think of that would fit that kind of profile would be some kind of shifter.

I was bored.

And then the mysterious Cullens arrived.

They came out of the woods like a mist; slowly but all at once. They kept a respectful distance away from the fire pit, clad in pristine new clothing that was a touch too light for the cold weather but was good quality. There were three of them - a blond man, a brunette woman, and a red-haired boy - all three of them taller than average, and pale as snow. And they were lovely, as if Grecian statues had climbed down from their plinth and wandered off.

“Hello,” the man said, nodding at us politely. “Thank you for welcoming us to this meeting.”

“You’ve a right to be here, as outlined in the treaty,” Billy Black said sternly. “This is the current Council - Charlie Swan for Forks. My self, Billy Black, and Harry and Sue Clearwater for the Quileute tribe. Fred Brandon as Mediator. Carlisle Cullen for the Cullen Coven.”

Coven meant vampires. That dampened my spirits a little; my history with vampires was messy. Plus the few vampires that had ventured into this area had been unpleasant experiences. But as I stared at the Cullen coven, I noticed their eyes.

Golden, like liquid light.

Was He one of them? Was the Cullen coven only these three, or where there more?

“And the young lady?” Carlisle Cullen said, looking in my direction.

“My niece,” Freddie said in a no-nonsense tone. “Shall we begin?”

“I assume Ursula Altis has since passed? My condolences to her family,” Carlisle Cullen said. “I had a great respect for Ursula.”

“Yes. Ursula’s apprentice passed on several years ago, and she named Fred and Alice as her successors,” Harry said.

“I am sorry for your loss,” Carlisle Cullen nodded at Freddie and I. I half-smiled back at him. Jeanie had been gone a long time but I still missed her.

“This is my wife, Esme, and my oldest son Edward,” Carlisle gestured to his two companions.

“Oldest son?” Charlie Swan said sharply.

“Yes - I have three others, but we did not want to overwhelm you,” Carlisle said. “They are here, if you would like to meet them?”

“Yes. We want to know the entirety of your coven,” Harry said bluntly.

Carlisle grimaced and nodded. “Of course. My other children - Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper.”

Three more Cullens materialised from behind Carlisle Cullen - a tall blonde girl who was utterly breathtaking to look at, had a displeased expression, and was wearing the genuine designer version of my knock-off winter coat. The second was a bear of a man, with the friendliest face, and curly black hair, who winked at me as he wrapped an arm around the blonde girl’s shoulders.

And then a lanky blond boy with a dark expression and wavy blond hair, who hovered in the shadows, his features mostly obscured. All of them had the same golden eyes, the same pallor and dark under-eye circles. But they didn’t look or behave like other nomads that had passed through. They looked… like a nice family.

Maybe in a decade, Jacob, Seth, and I would be joined by Emmett Cullen for the ‘burn or bury’ booze up. He looked like he’d be the most up for livening up these meetings.

“Your family has grown.” Billy’s voice was accusing, and I turned to look at his stern expression.

“My son, Jasper, joined us in 1965,” Carlisle Cullen said politely, “Looking for a different lifestyle. We have abided by your terms, and would not have returned to this area if we were not prepared to continue to do so.”

The Quiluetes weren’t thrilled with that news, and Charlie just looked kind of tired. Freddie was taking notes on his phone, and I was just cold and getting bored again… until I noticed movement out of the corner of my eye.

Jasper was prowling away from the others, closer to me, where I stood at my uncle’s side. Both eyes were on me, like liquid amber, and I finally got a good look at him.

Jasper was Him - the boy hovering over me, half-dressed on the gurney; the boy kissing my scar, and sliding in behind me in the shower. The boy that had hovered at the edges of my visions and dreams since I was young, with adoration in his eyes and gentle touches.

The boy I’d love so fiercely and deeply…

Talk about a terrible time to finally meet.

“Oh fuck,” I said, as I looked at him, eyes wide. All those wretched cliches that terrible books write about happened at that moment. I was enchanted, besotted, and absolutely irrevocably attached to this Jasper Cullen. He was mine.

“Step back!” Harry barked out, but Jasper Cullen ignored him, watching me carefully. I couldn’t help myself; I smiled brightly at him, and he kept moving towards me. Flashes of knowledge were appearing in my head, and for some reasons I kept seeing the Lovers card, still in my deck at home. I could hear people talking, getting angry, but it was like the buzz of insects as Jasper Cullen got closer to me. His hand reached out slowly, to stroke the curve of my cheek, studying me with the strangest look on his face.

And then the pain hit, like someone had shoved an ice pick through my left eye and into my brain. The visions were folding over and over, like origami, before I could decipher them. Choices being made, minds changing, so fast I could keep up. I heard myself cry out as I fell, and then everything was dark.

Then I was seeing things in real time. The way I fell, blood running from my nose, to everyone’s utter horror. My eyes were rolled back in my head, and my body jerked in a seizure a few times before I was still.

But no one could get near me. As soon as I had fallen, Jasper had crouched over my prone form, with a horrified look on his face. Everyone was yelling and trying to get closer, and Jasper let out a snarl that was, frankly, terrifying before refocusing on me, taking my hand and plucking my glove off it, to rest against his own cheek. Whatever that was supposed to achieve did nothing, and whilst everyone else was yelling and bickering, he let out a low whine that was so pathetic, if I’d had any control over my body, I would have sat up and given him a hug.

Then Carlisle Cullen placed his hands up to the Council in a gesture of peace and nodded to Emmett before approaching Jasper.

The conversation would have been too low for anyone else to hear, but not me, in whatever kind of vision this was.

“Jasper, I understand,” Carlisle Cullen said in a low voice. “But she’s got a medical condition, you need to let her people take care of her.”

Jasper growled low, Emmett’s hand on his shoulder.

“Bro, c’mon,” he said. “You’re scaring them,” he nodded over his shoulder. Sue’s face was white with fear, and I was scared that Harry was going to stroke out on the spot.

And I was there, Sleeping Beauty, with a smear of fresh blood on my face.

“I can’t,” Jasper seemed to force out between gritted teeth. “She’s mine.” It was said with determination and desperation, and a deep tenderness.

I was pleased that whatever my embarrassing collapse had been, at least I knew we were on the same page -that we knew each other and we knew each other.

And just like that, like they were magic words, my eyes open and I was back in reality, staring up at the man-boy who was staring at me like I held the secrets to the universe.

“Alice, did he hurt you?” Freddie called out in a strained voice.

“No, that was me. Too much new information,” I said, as I began to sit up, Jasper sliding my glove back on my hand before I realised it was still missing. He held out his hand to help me up, his touch so careful and gentle.

“Okay, good. Come over here,” Freddie motioned for me to move to where the group seemed to have bunched across from the Cullens. Charlie Swan looked murderous. “She’s nothing to you, boy, just let her go.”

I winced when Freddie said that, realising immediately it was like a red flag to a bull, and all of a sudden there was a lot of motion. Jasper growled, attempting to shove me behind him - to protect me? - whilst Emmett and Carlisle Cullen decided it was time to get Jasper physically under control, and pulled him back towards where the rest of the family was standing.

I tripped over a rock and stumbled but righted myself as Jasper was bodily dragged back to where Esme, Rosalie, and Edward Cullen were waiting, looking worried.

“Are you okay, sweetheart?” Mrs Cullen asked as I moved back to Freddie’s side, where he quickly clasped me to him, giving me the once over.

“I’m fine,” I said before catching Emmett having bent Jasper’s arms behind his back at a hideous angle, his knee digging into Jasper’s spine. “Oh, don’t hurt him! Please!” I made a move towards them but Sue grabbed my arm, and Jasper turned to stare at me with what I can only describe as hope.

“I think this meeting is done,” Charlie Swan said finally. “You agree to maintain the existing treaty - that’s all we need. Thank you for coming.”

“Of course, we don’t want to cause any issues,” Mrs Cullen said, and Freddie snorted, shielding me with his body.

I felt like a prisoner being frog-marched back to the car.

“Back at the Brandon’s?” Charlie said, as we arrived at the cars.

“Of course,” Freddie said. “Coffee and debrief.”

#twificmas2020 #ficmas2020 #jalice #alice cullen #jasper hale #cullen family #fandom #my writing #fan fic #my fic #wip #charlie swan #my fic: anathema

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wordupcomics · 3 years

Note

I love your AU and it fascinates me how you have handled each character's arc of emotions.

But I wonder how you came up with this great idea? Or what was your main idea or draft and did you end up posting this AU?

Short answer: ADHD and time

I’ve watched Wordgirl since I was a kid, but I didn’t get REALLY into it until I was a sophomore in high school. I struggled to focus on my work in school, I always wanted to focus on whatever hyperfixation I had at the time, which was always a cartoon. A trick I used in school was to use my hyperfixation to help me focus, this often meant pretending one character was struggling to get the same homework done that I was, and that another character was helping them. I also tended to lean towards obsessing over more familial relationships in shows.

So with Wordgirl, my hyperfixation usually focused on ToBecky. While I loved the ship, focusing on it meant no familial relationships to obsess over and tbh neither character would struggle in any of the subjects that I struggled in. This ended up with the idea of Becky and Tobey being older and having to help their child in school. From here I wondered how it would be if Wordgirl had a child with dyslexia. These ideas turned into Theo. I think Julie emerged from there as a foil to her brother.

Watching "The Incredibles" and "Meet the Robinsons" in the same weekend while i was on a Wordgirl hyperfixation had a big impact on this too 😂

Understand that the characters are thoroughly thought out because this all started when I was 16...I’m currently 24. This idea is 8 years old now. Over eight years this story has changed so much. Originally Becky and Tobey were going to date as teenagers, and that was changed because I didn't think it was realistic for several reasons. It was basically like "Oh, Tobey is a good guy now? He gave up villainy last week? Suddenly I trust him and think he's cute." Definitely glad I made them friends first and made Tobey work hard to be good for years before they started being a couple. Originally Bob wasn't supposed to leave, but to be completely honest I left him out of so much that it was like "good grief is he even here??" and I just took advantage of it and never changed it because it added more depth to Bob as a character and more depth to his and Becky's friendship. I went through several different scenarios as to why he'd be gone too. Originally some villains from WordGirl had gone good, while others hadn't, and I later decided it was more impactful to have them all be good now. Because The Incredibles was part of my inspiration, originally there was going to be a law against being a hero like in that movie, that was changed because I didn't want to copy the movie.

And it's still changing! Sometimes I have "aha" moments for characters that make me change stuff last minute because I think it's a better idea. A great example of this is one of my villains. I can't say too much about them because it's supposed to be a twist when they are introduced as the villain, but originally they were supposed to be a reference to one of the original Wordgirl villains, and acted a lot like the character they referenced. When I tried to plan out the story they are introduced in...something just wasn't working. Last minute I had this idea that would make their introduction more interesting, their role as a villain more interesting, and draw more parallels with the villain they were supposed to be based on. But in order for it to work I had to completely redo their personality, otherwise it wouldn't make sense. Personality wise, this character is now practically unrecognizable from the character they were supposed to reference. Plus now they have a new arc I have to incorporate into my grand story. I'll give you a pre hint as to who they were originally meant to reference, since it's no longer obvious: They are a HUGE fan of this now former villain they were supposed to be based off of. They express this in their debut story. Honestly them being a fan of this villain, and how they commit crime are probably the only things that stayed after I re-hauled their character.

And I think it's interesting you are fascinated already...because I've hardly posted anything of the official comics. You've only seen or read where these characters have been since Wordgirl's end. You haven't even seen where they are going. And how I came up with all that is...another post entirely... All that said there are other future aus in the Wordgirl fandom that are also really good! Seems like I’ve been seeing more people think of future aus which is awesome! One that comes to mind is the one by @animation-is-my-jam It’s so good and well thought out and their art is so cute and they have so many fun OCs! Definitely check them out if you like mine!

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juseki-taisen · 3 years

Text

Questions about OC’s people make

I’m answering this by a separate post instead of your ask, since not everyone online is friendly, and I would never want to even have a smidge of risk fall onto anyone

Don’t worry, skip to TLDR for a summery

That kind of idea has been around for a long time. People like making OC’s so they can interact with canon characters, it’s part of the fun! It’s also not unusual for people to try and make their character the star of a series (you see this a lot with characters that tend to be labeled mary/gary stu).

Now I am a BIG LOVER of OC’s and fan characters, and I’ve seen a lot of good/bad/ugly/awesome ones. (I’m also gonna age myself a lot here, so excuse me for that)

This gonna be a long ride, I apologize

Lemme age myself for a moment

Fandoms have had a lot of self insert/or ocs that change the main story line for a long, long, time. A really good example of this is the Naruto fandom (the toxic beast, would not recommend time traveling to join this fandom in the early days they can and will hurt you, but they are better now from what understand). The biggest example of this is when the original series ended BEFORE the age up arc/shippuuden

A lot of people didn’t like that Sasuke (person A) left the village and never came back in the main series. So, a lot of people (a lot of people who had a crush on person A mainly) made their oc’s alter the timeline to where he stayed.

It doesn’t even have to be this extreme, it can be as easy as wanting to participate in an event that happened in canon and changing it so OC solves the problem and alters the timelines (say to keep a character they really enjoy from dying).

A lot of time this happens because an event happens in canon people don’t like when a character dies, storyline takes a turn no one cares for (LOOKING AT YOU BEASTARS!)). So their OC’s/Self Inserts adjust it to a storyline that the reader/creator enjoys.

Now the problem with this in most fandoms is that there is ONE main storyline.

Example again, Naruto (this fandom wont let me go HELP)

This series is very linear, and there’s not wiggle room implicating there could be more universes/aus.

An example of the opposite is BOTH Voltron (Netflix adaptation) and Dragon Ball

Both series have messing with alternate universes, and timelines. Dragon ball goes a bit extreme and implies in the Xenoverse games there can be infinite alternate realities whereas Voltron implied a butt ton (scientific measurement LOL) of alternate universes.

This is important because adding in big events NOT canon to the timeline is easier since there’s a lot of different universes this COULD have taken place, which leaves the main canon storyline alone and safe.

So if they added say...a sibling of person X or Y, there is the possibility in one of the MANY timelines/realities they could have existed.

This is a problem for MOST series because a lot of fandoms don’t have this, and so adding a character in can become a problem. So most of the times people have to imply it’s an AU character OR add them in anyway for the sake of a story/fanfic and just accept canon is dead and we have killed it (for good, better, or worse.).

NOW - To the Juuni Taisen

This series ALSO has a series to paths/alternate timelines people could work in for fan characters. The problem lies in the fact that it implies that despite there being multiple paths, Nezumi destroys those realities by not choosing those routes as his primary.

It’s actually a great tie in to the fact he loves video games.

If going down path A doesn’t work, he reloads the save and tries path B and so on. But if he decides that path J is the one he wants to continue playing on, then he can not both play J and A, B, C, D ect. He can only canonically play path J, since that is the canon path he has chosen.

When people make oc’s usually they want to be a part of the series or have a character interact with certain characters. Sometimes it’s to change the story line, and sometimes it’s to alter (intentional or not) the main storyline. To be honest, in this case, unless the character doesn’t interfere with the Juni Taisen it leaves a LOT of limited wiggle room for ocs in the series. Why? Well they all DIE, so if you do want to interact with the characters with an oc, it has to be before and not after, unless you have Nezumi. Everyone dies but him, so if you wanna smooch Usagi’s cute face or have your OC take Tora to therapy, you gotta have all it take place before or in an AU, OR alter the canon storyline.

Now back to the different paths, why not choose them? Again, it’s because of Nezumi (this boy is both blessed and cursed). He loads path J, making Au’s possible and other paths canon, but they canonically never actually happened because he CHOSE one path before the others.

So if you do want to say ‘my character was part of X path’ that’s great! But I think a lot of people may realize that those alternate paths got erased from existence when Nezumi chose a different path. Since he did that, there are specific ways around it, but it makes it hella hard.

Ways around it

1) Alter canon timeline via Nezumi, and have him bring them back

2) Have ocs before canon

3) Time travel (I use this for my own oc, which I would be happy to go in depth with should anyone ask)

4) Alter canon timeline

I’m really not surprised OC’s are made to interact with the canon story in this fandom, or the fact they drastically change it. No one really enjoys seeing a favorite die and stay dead, especially when there was a chance they could have come back (not that they should, I love you Usagi but ya need therapy).

AND that’s just part of it

Another big part is wish fulfillment.

If OC was part of series then when X happened oc would have been there to help. That changes the storyline, but it makes the person who created the OC happy.

Example:

Ending of Beastars (I’d recommend the series for older audiences but the ending sucks nuggets) was REALLY unsatisfying for me. I had already been doing a fan comic based on it, but since I didn’t like the ending I’m going to actually redo my comic and change the ending (I will put an AU disclaimer because, obviously) but it will fulfill MY WISH for an ending that is satisfying to me

But again, Beastars doesn’t have multiple timelines, so I have to change canon for my series to make sense within it.

Another subset of this is people who want to be part of the series due to escapism. They want a happy ending for a series they enjoy, and they want to be part of it (this gets in to more self insert territory). Sometimes life is shitting on them hardcore and so to have a little power back by their fan stories, it makes real life just a smidge more bearable.

LONG STORY SHORT

Any OC’s added to series is somewhat altering canon. Juuni Taisen is unique in that it has a lot of alternate timelines, but the problem is the timelines get cleared from existence the moment Nezumi chooses a different path.

Personally, I think it can be fun to work around the constraints of the series, but if you’re going to go in depth with OC’s in this fandom, you do have to alter a lot of the series in a lot of ways. It’s valid to ask ‘Why not just choose a different path? Or do an AU?’ but a lot of people want to be part of the series themselves or have an OC to make the series ok.

I used to be a stickler about the believability of OC’s when I was younger (I was especially critical when I was taking college level English courses in high school) but I’m not like that anymore. This is in part to, again, the Naruto fandom.

I’ve loved OC’s forever, but when I made one for that series people were awful. People would send me anons telling me to kill myself, how much my writing and art sucked, ect. At the time I was a really sensitive bean. I stopped writing, I stopped doing a lot of artwork, and I stopped creating. I took a lot of it super personally (thanks anxiety and depression). BUT then something terrible happened.

I don’t know if anyone here would remember when the series ended completely, but when it did the fandom went nuts. I don’t mean just whining Destial level, I mean NUTS. They threatened to kill the creator if he didn’t change the ending, they sent threats to his family, they got violent as HELL.

They went way to far. It was really kind of scary?

But it made me realize something. There will always be someone who doesn’t like what you create, and there will be always someone who will criticize the way you write, draw, express yourself creatively.

Don’t let it stop you

TLDR;

People make OC’s and alter storylines for a variety of reasons. That’s okay. No, you don’t have to enjoy all the content people make, and YES you can have your opinions about it. I don’t like every OC or fanfic I come across. Some OC’s are wonderful, and some I don’t like. It’s my opinion. It’s okay to have an opinion. You are allowed not to enjoy things. You are allowed to think critically.

However, I do think people have a right to enjoy themselves. They’re making content for them, not for me, and that’s okay. I don’t have to read it, I don’t have to look at it, and I don’t have to spend time going through content I don’t enjoy. If they wanna make a character who supermans and saves the everyone in the Juni Taisen and flies off to mars, I may not like it but I will 100% support their creativity and right to do it.

Take that cringe culture and throw it away. Do what makes you happy. It wont always makes sense in canon, or it may not be the most clever way to do something, but do it anyway. Life is hard, fandoms are meant to be fun. As long as you’re not hurting or attacking anyone, you can be be as cringe as you’d like.

You all can make OC’s however you want, anyway you want. We all deserve a little serotonin.

Either way, I am here to support you and all your creations.

#long post #this kinda turned into a big analysis of OC's in general and not just the Juni Taisen #I don't know if I answered this correctly #but if I missed something please send it in again #I kind of went on a little bit of a tangent

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lesbian-vmin · 3 years

Note

Hi! Hope you have a good day! 🎄 So, this is not a question. Since you write ffs, I wanted to share some thoughts on that. I've started to read ffs for the first time ever, my fav pair is of course Vmin, BUT... Most of the fics present JM kinda like a "feminine" boy. As if has to be presented like that to "fit" the role or something.. Idk... I just find that annoying AF.. Since you write ffs, could you recommend me some that you think I would like?

Some of mine? Because...like I said, I don’t read much. 😅

I also don’t like people trying to make Jimin too girly because....he’s not really super masculine, obviously. But I don’t like the “clearly influenced by toxic masculinity” feminine image that a lot of people use.

I don’t have that many that are published currently. ☹️ I’m in the process of finishing my Vmin demon AU which has my strongest image of Jimin yet. There are some heavy themes in the story, since it’s about demons. So if you don’t like the idea of actually evil “ish” demons, it might not be for you. But Jimin is strong and Tae is super soft for him. Jimin is treated well, and there aren’t elements of abuse directed toward him. And the first book is also heavily smut based....the rest aren’t so much. I don’t like writing smut so much, but it fit with the plot for that story. Particularly in the first book. You’ll understand if you read it. (x) <- Link to the first book. You can find the rest of the series in the description part.

I also have my 9-lives story with Kitty Jimin hybrid. He’s pretty strong in that story, too. And there’s one smut chapter because it was highly requested and I hate it. I’m actually going to rewrite that one soon and make it much better. It was originally posted on aff 5 years ago, and nothing like what I’d write today. So I want to redo it. Because I really like the story, and I think it could be better. It’s kind of cute and funny and not very serious. Very different compared to the demon AU. (x)

Then I have the soulmate fic. (x)

And one about them growing up and growing apart before coming back together. (x)

A funny medieval arranged marriage AU that has eventual smut because it was, again, highly requested. It was originally supposed to be one chapter. (x)

A rewrite of the Corpse Bride with Vmin. (x)

And the Humane Society AU. (x)

A lot of these are older because I haven’t published anything more recently. But I’ve been working on writing a lot more, so there are a bunch of things coming soon. In fact, if all goes well, I have a one shot coming on Christmas Day (my time).

I think my depiction of Jimin tends to have feminine touches because that’s how he is. And I think he’s okay with that. But I don’t just make him a cheap shot weak ass woman character for the “man” to look good like I’ve seen people do. It’s why I stopped reading fan fics. I don’t like when people make actual women flat ass characters with no dynamics and real personalities like that. The same applies to Jimin.

And I’m always happy to take requests. Stories that I’ve written in request end up anywhere from 5,000 words (I seldom write less than 5,000 word stories) to several chapters. However, I’m not doing smut requests anymore. Because I don’t like writing smut for the sake of writing smut.

I will also be posting links to my stories here as they are published.

#answered #anonymous #vmin #vmin fic

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oppsie--channie · 5 years

Text

I do still love you | Bang Chan

Summary: Y/n, a trainee at JYPE for a couple of years, dated Chan, the leader of one of the most successful kpop groups from this generation, when they were both trainees. In contrary to what most people think, they still have feelings for one another.

Warning: a LOT of angst, also if you wanna hear "Lookalike" by Conan Gray DO IT (cause it was based on that)

A/n: Hello :') it's been awhile since I last posted. I needed to get a time to readjust after what happened. But I'm back at it again with an angst scenario. I hope y'all like it :)

Your voice is melodic, hitting every note you attempt to do. You hold so much emotion inside of you that you might let it all out at any moment, but you try to contain yourself. And more importantly, you try to contain the memories that flood your mind.

Let's go back to the summer night

When we met eyes, it's like a movie line

Kissin' underneath the city lights

"Why are you starring are me?" Chan asks you while he's laying his head on your lap. You continue to stare at him and smile widely. Chan lifts himself until he's sitting in front of you on the grass. "What is it?"

"Nothing." You giggle, feeling playful earning a sigh from your boyfriend. Your eyes dart to the big dark sky above you and you take in the sight of the stars that make the sky brighter.

"Y/n?" You hum in response, to which Chan giggles and holds your chin making you look at his face. "You know that I love you, right?" Your cheeks turn a light shade of pink and he smiles fondly.

"I know you do!" You lean forward and initiate a passionate kiss.

But now you're laying in another girl's arms

'Cause I'm all gone

Tears prick your eyes when you remember your first true love. You blink your eyes numerous times while continuing to sing, not wanting to waste precious time crying when you could be practicing. You hear some male voices down the hallway but you couldn't care less, your evaluation is in 2 days and you feel like you aren't ready. And if it isn't now, you've put your mind to the idea that you will give up on your dream to debut.

Can't redo what's already done

Can't compete 'cause I've already won

"I don't think it's gonna work." You throw your arms in the air as a form of surrender.

"Why not?" Chan steps forward towards you, but you step back immediately, startling him with the spontaneous action. "Don't you love me anymore?" You can sense his voice cracking and as much as you want to hold him right now, you can't do it.

"I do still love you. But we can't hide something that we both know everyone knows about." His eyebrows furrow and you continue explaining. "What do you think everyone will think when you debut and you don't seem sad as if you didn't broke up with your girlfriend?! What do you think people will say about you? That you're heartless and that you never really loved me..." You pause a little, to breathe and to contain your tears inside your eyes. "People will suspect that you didn't broke up with me! And I can't let you ruin your chance for me." You suddenly yell the last sentence and he jumps slightly. "I just can't let you do that." Your voice is soft this time, but you feel like you'll collapse at any moment.

"Do you really wanna do this?" His voice is softer than you imagined it would be. "Do you really don't wanna try to hide it?" You shake your head negatively while looking to your feet. "Alright... At least can I give you a last kiss?" You look up and you shiver at the sight; Chan has tears running down his eyes and you feel bad because you didn't let any run down your cheeks. You slowly nod your head and he approaches you.

His hands make their way softly to your waist and pull you to his body, before directing one of his hands to your cheek and connecting your lips to his. The kiss is shallow and gentle at first but when your hands reach his hair involuntarily, he licks your bottom lip for you to give him entrance, which you do almost immediately, still used to his actions from the last 2 years.

When he steps back, you miss his touch and you can feel a lonely tear running down your left cheek, so you look down being careful for him not to see your state.

"I guess I'll just leave. Goodbye, y/n. I love you." He walks slowly towards the door of the practice studio in hopes that you'd say something other than what you said.

"Goodbye, Chan. I wish you the very best." You try to look up, but more tears start to flood your vision. When you're sure that he had already left the room, you continue to say what you wanted to say since the beginning. "And I love you. I always will."

Don't you know we're done?

Delicate steps can be heard entering the practice room that you're in and you are quick to clean the few tears that slipped out of your eyes before anyone could see them. But when you look to the door, while still singing, and see who it is, your eyes betray you and start to water again. You quickly turn around and try hard to ignore the presence that set place on the sofa of the studio.

"You're doing great." You hear his soft voice complimenting you and you have to contain yourself not to turn to him and just jump into his arms, because after all he has a girlfriend now. So you just ignore him and continue to sing.

I know in your head

You see me instead

'Cause she looks a lot like I did back then

Baby don't lie

She's just a lookalike

You're seated in the music studio with one of your trainee friends while looking at random stuff on your twitter. But when you come across a tweet with a surprising new, you dropped your phone on the group while looking straight to your front, without caring about your device. Your friend, Jinae, gasped and quickly grabbed your phone, turning the screen to her to see what made you drop it. When she reads it, she looks at you with a pitiful stare.

"I'm so sorry, y/n." She knew that whatever she said it wouldn't change anything so she just gave you your phone back and hugged you lightly, standing up immediately after. "I'm gonna leave you alone for a little bit. I'm gonna grab a coffee, do you want anything?" You could only shake your head. So when she left the studio, you dropped your phone again and put your hands in front of your face, not wanting to risk anyone seeing you in that state.

It had been 2 years since your break up with Chan, and reading something saying that he was dating again, broke your heart. It broke your heart even more when you saw a picture of the girl it was. Lee Sungkyung. A famous model and actress who is older than Chan by 7 years. Also, you can't take your mind off of the fact that her appearance is extremely similar to yours when you both dated.

"I still love you..." You cried out while picking up your phone and exiting the studio, going directly to the bathroom, where you knew you could cry in peace without anyone seeing you.

No matter how I try to hide

And erase you from my mind

I'm dying

To find a lookalike

At this point in time, you can't care less for your appearance. You're sure that your hair is disheveled from all the times you've run your hand through it trying to contain your emotions, your cheeks are stained from all the tears you've spilled and your pants dirty since you knelt on the ground while you went through a tough flashback to when you learned that your ex boyfriend was dating someone.

You feel someone approach you and before they get to you, you know exactly who it is. You could recognize those hurried steps everywhere.

"I don't want your help, Chan." You stand up quickly and set the microphone on the little table you had behind you. You also stop the melody of the song, setting a long silence before you look upwards and gasp while looking at the boy in front of you.

He had tear stained cheeks, his hair was also disheveled and his hands were red from closing them too hard. You wanted to yell at him. Ask him what he was doing there and if he didn't have anything else to do than just to torment you. But all you could let out was a tired sob.

"What happened to us?" He pronounces for the first time while looking in your eyes and you could tell that he was suffering.

"Life and dreams happened to us." You laughed dryly at your truthful joke. And the only thing he could do was give you a weak smile. "Are you happy with her?" You let curiosity take the best in you and before you knew you were asking a question that you really didn't want to know. He hesitated for a bit and for an instant you thought he wasn't going to answer.

"Not when I think about you." The tears that had stopped at the brim of both of your eyes fell, leaving a trail of pain and shock down your face. "I still love you!" He whispered more to himself than to you, but you could still hear him.

"And you know I do too." Hope fills up his eyes but it's replaced with emptiness when he hears your next words. "But we can't be together." You clean your face with the sleeves of your hoodie and return to the table to grab the microphone again. "Can you please leave? I have to finish practice." You try your best to stay strong this time and surprisingly you can do it.

"Of course, I'll leave you to it." Chan quickly cleans his face as well and heads to the exit of the room and before he is completely out of it, he turns around one last time, giving you an hopeful smile. "I know you'll finally make it."

You see him get out of the studio and closing the door behind him, so when you turn the melody of the song on again, your tears can't contain themselves and start to run down your face again. You can only kneel, incapable of bearing the pain that the moment caused you.

No, I can't lie

I need a lookalike

#skz #stray kids #bangchan #bangchan scenario #skz angst hours #stray kids angst #bangchan angst #skz angst

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madrabbitsociety · 4 years

Text

Sometimes, and I do not mean for this to sound malicious, which it will, I feel the need to defend hairdressers.

Hairdressers and hair stylists are skilled technicians who go through thousands of hours of training in order to hone their craft. Some of us were lucky enough to go to a technical school while in high school and are not in debt. I, however, paid almost $25,000 to go to school. I had to go for 1500 solid hours. In my state, that meant Mon-Thurs evenings for 5 hours a night. In my opinion, people don’t give stylists enough credit for what they need to know to get licensed in their state. Specifically, my license is for cosmetology. I had to know skin disorders, chemical reactions, actual strand structure - and we still don’t get told enough because we don’t get proper training on different types of hair, but that’s a whole different post that a lot of other people have done better than me.

The predominant way we are paid in the industry is via commission. So if we have no one scheduled, we don’t get paid. If we have a client cancel, we don’t get paid. At my first salon I was expected to stay as early as I could to as late as I could, unpaid, just in case someone came in. Of course, corporate places are mildly better in that they offer a minimum wage, but that’s usually somewhere between $7-9 an hour. In order to earn commission in that type of situation you have to do more in services than what you would have been paid for the hour. Again, probably an entire post in itself.

I tried a lot of places. I paid a lot of money for a license I was very proud to own. The final straw was a salon near my house. Personality-wise, I really felt like it would work out because I enjoyed the people I was around and I was disappointed when it didn’t work. When I first started, they insisted I do two unpaid apprenticeship days because I was (licensed for 6 months at that time) too new to work on their clients. They would provide models and charge the models a lower service fee than their usual service fee. I would then have two paid days at $10 an hour where I would basically follow the owner around, clean and do shampoos. On my days off, I was expected to want to come into the salon and continue to apprentice for free. There was a point in my apprenticeship phase where I was only being paid two days for 5-6 days worth of work.

Again, this is not uncommon in the industry. Maybe not to this extreme, but certainly there’s a lot of free work being done. Does your stylist have someone help them blowdry? You might want to make sure that apprentice is being paid.

My skills did improve greatly during this period, but I maintain that was because I put a lot into it. The owner took all the credit- through his great teaching methods, I was becoming an ‘okay’ hairdresser.

During the apprenticeship, unless you handed me a cash tip, he kept all of my credit card tips. So if you added a tip after service with your credit card, the salon kept them because they said I was using their electricity/taking up space in the salon and I needed to pay for that.

In addition to all of the time I listed above actually being in the salon, I was also expected to attend continuing education classes. In summary, and again this is not an uncommon culture in the industry, if you do not eat-sleep-breathe HAIR, you are told you’re not good and you won’t do well. The only exception seems to be if you have children, but if you’re single/without kids they will work you to the bone.

When I was finally promoted to a junior stylist, I stopped being paid hourly at all. I was told I would get 36% commission for services and I was specializing in color corrections/the blonding journey at the time, so I was doing $200-300 services quite often. Some of those services took 4-6 hours of my time, but if I had no one scheduled I was still expected to straighten up, do laundry, sweep the floors and help other stylists with color application and blowouts. Which is fine, kind of. The problem became that from the start of my journey at that specific salon, I would be expected to arrive when we opened at 10 AM and stay until the owner finished his clients- sometimes I didn’t leave until 11-12 PM, and was expected to come back the next day.

So yes, one $300 color service could mean that I earned 14-16$ an hour, but… when you’re working 10-12 hour days that kind of knocks it down to minimum wage again.

Then there is the opinion that this is an easy job that so many people can do and you don’t need to be vaguely intelligent to do it. That the people who chose hair are stupid or unskilled. I was sitting on the steps of my school once, reading an Agatha Christie book and comparing certain passages to an ACD Sherlock Holmes story via text message with SpicyMags, when an older couple walked by. The man looked up at the school sign and scoffed, “These girls are getting suckered into a scam. This is nothing but a scam and they’re stupid enough to fall for it.”

Well, in retrospect, he’s not wrong, but at the same time when you know the blood and sweat and tears- the thousands of hours and dollars that are poured into not only the initial licensing but the continued education classes- being a hairdresser is so much more than people give it credit for. It’s an abusive industry that exploits a lot of unpaid labor and even when you get to a point where you have skill, where you are an artist, you have people asking for a luxury service and then complaining when that unnecessary luxury costs them actual money.

One last thing I’d love to point out- the 100% customer service guarantee. A lot of salons these days are trying to change, but a lot of them also still have a guarantee that if you don’t love your hair, you get a free redo or a refund. Do you know what that means? Your stylist doesn’t get paid.

So I can spend 6-8 hours on your hair after you tell me it’s been box dyed brown attempting to take you through the lightening journey to get it blond. I can tell you that because of the molecules and ingredients in the dye, the actual damaged structure of your hair, that it is not possible to do it all in one day but I can get you close. I can explain to you the entire process, waste all my time being completely honest with you about how golden it’s still going to look because it IS a journey/process, and at the end you can decide that because I didn’t get your hair to solid white in one go that you want a refund…

And I don’t get paid for the entire day that we spent together.

That’s some fucking bullshit, but it’s - and this is a quote from several of the places I’ve worked- an “industry standard”.

The cherry on this shituation cake is that we also don’t get any health benefits, life insurance, retirement- no freaking anything (corporate salons being a slight exception although having worked in the medical field I can tell you the benefits offered by corp. owned salons are not great.)

So please, next time you decide that it’s laughable that a salon quotes you $150 for a craft haircut that takes a certain level of knowledge and skill, remember that the salon gets most of that and if you don’t like it there’s a huge change your stylist isn’t getting paid.

Edit: Things that I did not mention but should have- the toll it takes on your body (repetitive motions and standing in heels on concrete floors cause back issues, neck and hip issues, knee issues, carpal tunnel and risk of cutting off your knuckle with your instruments). I had to sign a release that my school was not responsible for me cutting any part of my body with my shears (I’ve had bosses who lost toes and knuckles). You think that heels thing is a joke? I’ve worked in several salons where ‘female’ stylists were required to wear heels and at least three items of make-up because ‘this was the beauty industry and we had a standard to keep’. Say you gather a clientel and can rent your own chair or booth, you’re responsible for purchasing every single bit of supplies you might need to continue doing what you’re doing, so you’re still having business costs eat into your hourly wage. People need to give a fucking standing ovation to hairdressers, okay, because this industry is brutal.

I’m not saying I dislike doing hair, or that I’d never do hair again, but there are several reasons I’m not doing it right now.

#madrabbitsociety #mad rabbit society personal stuff

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