#what i meant by those tags is i dont know how to love people a normal amount i swear when i care about someone theyre on my mind 24 7

[vitamin-zeeth]

For my English course this year I wrote an essay on the debate of fine art vs contemporary art and I haven't reread it since I sent it in I wanna see if I can find this shit cause I have no clue what I ended up stating as my opinion

[bayrut]

never felt like I could put all my myself in a friendship tbh I always felt like I had more than what anyone was willing to carry :/

i totally understand and I'm so sorry :( but trust me you are a wonderful person and you aren't a weight to carry

[gffa]

Im having tons of fun crawling all over your dick grayson tag and checking out the comics you've commented on. Batman year one:scarecrow has to be my favorite bbydick and bruce dynamic lol, but also if my dad nerve pinched ME to keep me out of the fight idve gone ballistic immediately upon waking. Betcha dick made *very sure* bruce could never keep him out of a fight that way again (though i didn't quite understand what dick meant when he said he feared batman in a godfearing way? Like its a raw as hell line but i dont quite get what he meant)

Excellentttttt, there's a lot of really fun Dick Grayson comics out there, and that one is just an absolute joy. (I would also recommend One Bad Day: Mr. Freeze, because I think it captures the same feral gremlin angel baby energy of Year One: Batman/Scarecrow! But also Robin & Batman. And Batman: Dark Victory.) The art combined with the dynamic is just so top-tier:

Dick just REFUSING to be serious about Bruce's cranky moods!

Dick casually flinging himself upside down on the couch while talking to Bruce! Refusing to let Bruce snipe at him, he's serious about this, too, you know! What's making you such a pill tonight?

Dick scooting under Bruce's arm to get a better look at some evidence in their case, like he's so little! And he just WRIGGLES RIGHT IN THERE, absolutely no thought for personal space! Or leans his head right on Batman's arm to get a closer look! And that's something that will continue even when he's big as an adult, he has never met personal space of a loved one that he would not casually violate!

Hopping up on the table to curl up with his arms around his knees, like he's not a tiny baby child, and going, "Bruce, seriously, something's wrong, talk to me." as if he's the adult in this situation while sitting there like a TINY BABY CHILD.

Leaving money for a guy they just beat up!

Bruce PICKING HIM UP BY THE SCRUFF OF THE NECK like he weighs nothing, like he's just a pet cat to haul out of harm's way!

Dick trying to flirt with the receptionist and Bruce LOOMING with a cracking knuckles gesture, like if you even THINK about taking this tiny baby child seriously about how he's offering a date, it will not end well.

THEN MOVING DICK OUT OF THE WAY BY PUTTING ONE HAND ON HIS FACE AND SHOVING, I love Bruce, he's awful and the best.

Dick noticing details and asking really good questions, like that kid may not be as trained as Bruce is yet, but it definitely shows he had a natural affinity for detective work, that he's probably genuinely one of the best detectives out there after Bruce himself!

But also the "god-fearing way" and the nerve pinch lend it some nice crunch, because those moments (for all that this is a genre where these things should NOT be taking totally seriously, this is comics) are really kind of fucked up. I think, while Dick doesn't fear Bruce as a person, he can see the person Bruce is underneath the persona, there's part of him that understands Bruce is not always in control of himself and he does things he later regrets because of it. The whole mini is undercurrented with Bruce being in a bad mood, being surly and snapping, beating up people with more force than needed, slamming tables in his frustration, not talking things out. Dick sees how that plays out, it's why he keeps needling Bruce to talk to him--and Dick's not going to let any of that hold him back, he clearly feels safe enough to tease Bruce, to wriggle in under his arm, to lean on him, to snap back at him. But he also knows that Bruce can do things that are terrifying. He fears that Bruce is going to shut him out. He fears for the people in Batman's way. He knows Bruce will regret those things, but when Batman swoops down on someone he sees as being in his way, that's terrifying, like a wrathful, vengeful god. He's not really bothered by the nerve pinch, he gets why Bruce did it, and it hardly slowed him down that much. He understands that it was Bruce's way of protecting him, because he didn't want Dick to get hurt, but also I think Dick probably sees it as a challenge--to avoid it or overcome it again in the future, it's good training! Like, what a beautiful, wonderful, sweet, fucked up dynamic those two have! What a hilarious feral gremlin child he is, what an incredible "the child has to be just as mature as the adult, sometimes more mature" deliciously awful dynamic that is! Anyway, if any of you others enjoy Batman comics, please read Year One: Batman/Scarecrow, it is so funny and delightful and fucked up in a way I'm not sure it meant to be but sure is tasty as hell!

[jinkookspencil]

i just don't understand pt 2

in which jungkook does not understand how his friend doesn't have a crush on namjoon

a drabble sequel to the drabble 'i just don't understand' -

i'd say you need to read that first, it's just 500 words but if you really don't want to, i included the last bit of dialogue at the beginning of this fic i dont care if drabbles can't have sequels, it just worked out this way lmao

description/tags: jungkook drabble / fluff / friends to lovers / ~900 words / jk comes off a little more insecure here but it kind of works because i'd always imagined this as a younger version of him / hope you enjoy!! / it's been a while since i wrote anything but i have a recent writing update i recently shared (this is *not* the jk thing i am currently working on - i hope to have that done for his birthday!)

+

“What the hell are you attracted to?” Jungkook laughs. “Ugly, stupid, mean, untalented guys?”

“Of course not, Jungkook,” you sigh. “I like other handsome, smart, kind, respectful guys.”

“Like who?”

“Like YOU!”

This was not how you imagined confessing. 

“Like…. Like me?!”

Dropping the plushie in his hands, Jungkook gestures to himself in disbelief.

“I said like you, Jungkook,” you emphasize, hoping it wasn’t too late to back out of your frustration-fueled confession.

“So…. Not me?”

What the fuck were you supposed to say now?! You pick up the teddy bear and tug at its pink fur, staring at its face and hoping the bear’s smile would turn into a murderous one, killing you and waking you up from this anxiety-inducing nightmare. 

Jungkook calls your name quietly and quickly, bringing you back life.

“Like you. You, Jungkook. I like you.”

“Over… over Namjoon?” he winces, and you do too. It was the most humiliating way someone could have responded to a confession…. hoping you’d fall in love with someone else instead. 

“Yes, Jungkook. Over Namjoon," you reply with your head in your hands.

“So all those things you said to describe him… handsome, smart, you think that of me too?”

“Yeah, of course,” you chuckle, finally looking up at him, “that and so much more, actually.”

“But there’s a difference? Between what you think of me and what you think of Namjoon-hyung?”

“Oh, there’s a big difference.”

“You described the both of us with the same string of adjectives, though….”

Jungkook was a clever guy…. Why was he acting so stupid?

“Who cares if you share some similar qualities?! I am not attracted to Namjoon. Period. I am attracted to you, Jeon Jungkook. The person born on September 1, 1997, who always wears black, loves karaoke, samgyeopsal, the movie Titanic, and the scariest fucking theme park rides! The Jeon Jungkook that’s sitting right in front of me. You.”

Jungkook's breath is shaky, his voice the same when he speaks. “I just find it hard to believe…. Not Namjoon. And not only that - me over Namjoon….”

“I don’t know how to explain it in more words, Koo…. I like you. I like you in the way that people have crushes on each other. You make my heart flutter while also putting it at ease. I like you.”

The boy in front of you doesn’t say anything, merely stiffens his posture, and you know it only meant the worst.

“This…. This calls for the end of our friendship doesn’t it?” you mumble, voice breaking and bubbling, ready to burst into tears.

“No…. No, absolutely not….” he says, breaking out of his catatonic state to sit next to you on the couch and hug your plushie once again. “Let me explain something this time… You know how I gush over Namjoon?”

“Of course,” you groan, and Jungkook rolls his eyes.

“And I always try to understand why you aren’t attracted to him… right?”

“Yeah…”

“I know Namjoon and I are not the exact same. Of course I do, that’s why I look up to him and keep recommending him to you and I guess… I guess it’s because in my head, I was trying to convince myself that you had to go for guys like Namjoon… because you’d never go for guys like me…”

“…. And what do you mean by guys like you?” 

“Guys that have nothing in common with you. You say Namjoon and I are both handsome and smart... But in truth, you and he share the similarities and I could never compete. You're both beautiful in the 'once-in-a-lifetime' kind of way. You're both clever in the book-ish way - do you know you have the exact same books as he does? I bought a book two weeks ago to try and impress you but I haven’t gotten past the introduction so I was too ashamed to even tell you. Oh, that one time, you both recommended the same drama series to me… on the same day. I thought for sure that you’d hooked up and seen it together, and that’d be that. But then you called me crying when it ended, wrapped up in your fluffy pink blanket in bed with chips.”

“You asked me why I didn’t call Namjoon…”

“And you said ‘why would I?’… Even if you weren't hooking up, I could’ve given you a million reasons as to why you could've called him instead. That drama was too artsy for me, but not for either of you. I didn’t even understand what you were saying on the phone that day - the message behind the story, or whatever - I was just so happy that you’d called and that you’d think I’d get it.” 

Jungkook lets out a laugh as he shakes his head. For some reason, it breaks your heart.

“I tried to make ‘you and Namjoon’ happen because it’s the only logical thing I could see in front of me…… The only answer I could come up with… You’re… the most wonderful person I’ve ever known, YN. I want what’s best for you - you deserve the best kind of guy there is…. and that’s definitely Nam-“

You push your lips against Jungkook’s, interrupting him with a kiss.

“It’s you, Jungkook. You’re the best fucking person I know.” You kiss him again. “I’d pick you a million times over.”

“Well, what if-“

“Can we forget about Namjoon entirely for a moment? I want the boy I like to shut up and kiss me…. If you want to, that is.”

Jungkook’s smile turns into one you rarely see. A smirk, devilish, menacing…. Delectable as he nods and meets you with a deep kiss, electrifying every inch of your body.

You were always a know-it-all and you'd been right once again: this was always the boy for you.

[intotheelliwoods]

@kinky-asexual I love myself having certain colors represent certain themes/events/occasions :) TYSM by the way!!

---

I bring you this doodle! @greentrickster

---

Dont know why I drew this but here you go. @wraenata Have an emotional support peepaw.

Anyways, Marcus Moncrief was on Saturday Night Live, live!! Donnie was rambling to Leo about the concept of freezing time by reaching absolute 0 in Kelvin :)

---

Oh I have been waiting for someone to ask me something like this, you have no idea. Putting this ESSAY under a cut oops I wrote a ton (if the cut even works, sometimes they dont)

I am very aware of the norm of the usual take of Future Leo AU's, it was all those AU's and fics that mad inspired me after all! They are all so good and play on a very interesting concept! Issue is, it ended up being the only take I ended up seeing. With the whole future and present self having some form of resentment towards eachother even if it was just a little bit, or for only a short period of time. I honestly needed a fresh breath of air and it came to my attention as time went on that other readers also needed a breath of fresh air. So uh, I very much saw the opportunity here and took it, with the added bonus of it being in comic form since theres so many fics out there.

Yes my comic is absolutely the opposite of the norm and I plan on keeping it like that, I made it the opposite of the norm for a reason, and the reason definitely shows through the sheer numbers and attention I have been getting on this thing! I am so happy so many people are enjoying the series! I am so glad to heal everyones wounds from the anguish of the usual plotlines haha!

Sidenote, I would actually highly recommend this post by pinetreevillain, read the tags, words things better than I ever could. Not just the OP's tags, all the reblog tags too.

(There may have been fics were the Leos were actually nice to eachother, but either I did not hear of them/see them, or they were just overall not popular enough to be well known and recognized for the good relationship)

I understand that such a fast change in character meanwhile does not happen overnight. This here is probably the biggest issue I have within the series, though I do have a little bit of reasoning.

I am just going to be flat out honest, I personally find it hard for myself to sit and read through something about characters arguing, it makes me weirdly uneasy. Something something about characters who love eachother yelling it out just hits me in a way I try to avoid whoops. So if I find it hard to read something like that, it is even harder for me to write and draw it out myself, there will be no forms of these sorts situations in the series because of that. Though this does tie back into me trying to avoid the norm, having everyone be kind to Leo after the movie is a take you do not see often.

I actually attempted addressing the movie aftermath with Raph and Leo with this comic, it was the whole point on why I made the comic! Because yes! I These two really did need some new take, my own take, on the aftermath. I wanted to show in that comic that Raph is not mad, happy actually, that Leo managed to pull himself together for such an act. Leo proved on that day that he knew what he was doing, how to care for a team, and that he was truly meant for his role as the leader.

Final little point: Lets be honest I dont think anyone will have the guts to even be mad at Leo after he sacrificed himself and his arm to save everyone. How could anyone be mad at that? Outside the fear of loosing him of course

[seeminglydark]

1. would caro and john be into the tv show, the x-files? would they buy tapes of the episodes and talk about their own conspiracies and guess about the outcomes of the episodes.

2. also your comic has help peak my interest for the supernatural and conspiracy theories. what are some stories or theories that you’ve learned about that you have found the most interesting? and were you a believer before starting your comics or has your interest grown as you’ve continued with your comics.

3.lastly, i’m trying to buy more secondhand items and become the diy punk that i’ve aspired to be since high school (too afraid since i was a closeted trans man and living with an unaccepting family), any tips?

i, like john, try to stay away from modern tech as much as i can. i’m able to stay off my phone for the most part and rarely use my computer but i’ve been looking around and audiobooks on cassette are kinda expensive around me so i like to narrate book as i read them in paperback. i was wondering if canonically john uses resources such as the library and what his favorite books and movies are. i love horror and am just now getting into sci-fi and i love watching movies on my vcr + tv combo and i sometimes use a blu-ray player for more rare or expensive (at least in vhs format) movies.

sorry for the long winded paragraph, i’m unfortunately unable to escape my strict household (despite being an adult) until i find a job and am able to save every cent. i also tend to isolate myself so i have no friends to help me out. sorry to vent to you about this but i just wanted to end this by saying your comic and characters inspire me and give me hope that i’ll be okay once i’m free.

YES. John is obsessed with x-files. every once in a while you can see he has the iconic 'i want to believe' poster in his younger years on his walls. He still has it as an adult. both caro and john like watching those together, they also enjoy the twilight zone, charmed, Buffy (they they agree the corny movie from '92 is the best) and those old Bruce Campbell shows noones heard of, re: Brisco County Jr. I think as kids they theorize, and as adults they talk about everything everyone gets wrong, now that they know how these things really work. John can always guess WhoDunnit.

Ive always been interested in the idea of the supernatural. im a big skeptic though, ill be honest there, even though ive had many 'experiences' myself. i kinda like the idea of the unbelievable. definitely making the comics has peaked my interest in things i wasn't too keenly aware of before, like cryptids. im fascinated by the concept of Missing 411, and missing people who reappear somewhere else, but Liminal Spaces hold my heart specifically. ive always been keenly aware of the off feeling in those places before i even knew what that meant. i love scouring the internet for images of things like abandoned hotels that give me a weird kind of uneasy, most of the things people tag as Liminal aren't really that, so its a scavenger hunt to find something that fits my idea of it. coming up with the lore of my stories has been an adventure. my interest has definitely grown, more in places and phenomenon than in ghosts specifically.

there are so mnay things you can do to diy punk stuff, in my opinion thats the best and most rewarding way. it sounds to me that you need to start small and slow for your safety, so let me reassure you right here anon, that punk is a set of ideals, and not just fashion. youre still punk no matter what youre wearing. a jacket or vest is always a good place to start, you can literally buy ANYTHING at the thift store that strikes your fancy. this is a canvas you will be adding too for as long as its yours. once you have your canvas, its time to create, and there is literally no wrong way to do this. you can use paint markers, embroidery, bleach, ect. dont have money for spikes and studs? you can use soda can tabs and bend them, metal lighter caps, hell even staples and safety pins always look cool. you can make your own badges by bending metal soda or beer caps around a soda tab with a safety pin through it and then paint whatever you want on the cap. dental floss is what you usually see when punks have the white stitching on their pants and jackets, its durable and doesn't break, since crust and gutter punks need tough clothes that last. if you're worried about your family, i would personalize it first in small secret ways that are just for you, such as a message beneath your collar as seen here on my friends jacket. and here, and here! he hides patches on the inside as well! Im including a pic of john hiding a patch on caros varsity jacket as well. i will post my jackets one day, my camera is broken but i figured id share his since he hides things more than i do!

John absolutely uses the library, its a fantastic resource for SO many things, depending on where you're located. He would also probably use a digital reader later, because many of them you can get library cards on and borrow books that way. he is not a strong reader so he mostly reads books that may be under his age level, like goosebumps, but who cares, do what you enjoy. movie wise hes very obsessed with cosmic horror (hence the UFO tattoo) his favorites are Alien, The Thing, Killer Klowns from Outer Space and the Blob from the 80s. both he and Caro love the original Evil Dead franchise, horror comedy like American Werewolf in London, lost boys, etc.

Thank you, Anon, for the long winded paragraph. You asked some really fun questions for me to answer, i love nothing more than to talk about my characters, it was a really nice little break from editing a new podcast episode. I am so so sorry about your situation, and i am sending you all the best and all the love and strength that you can come out of this free and on the other side and live as yourself. If my comics and characters stories can provide a tiny bit of hope that its going to be ok, than ive succeeded at what i set out to do. wishing you all the best. and look into your library, they may have resources to help you with this as well.

[pynkgothicka]

Hiiii! I wanted to ask for an Yandere! hoseok x Fem!reader were they are in college and people are starting to disappear and the reader notices that it’s most of her friends and she soon finds out that Hoseok is the one killing them? And his reasoning is because obviously he likes her and wants her to himself and he’s jelly… it’s probably confusing lol

Ｓａｌｖａｔｏｒｅ ＪＨＳ

Synopsis - Everyone is disappearing, and Hoseok seem to be the only one left for you.

Pairing - Yandere! Hoseok x Fem! Reader

Tags and Warnings - murder, violence towards reader, manipulation

Authors Note - This took me so long lol

A friendly reminder that all my works are dark fanfiction! Please if you do not like that do not read them! This is your final warning before hitting the keep reading button!!

Going to college in pursuit of a graphic design degree was more than a stress rather than some casual learning. Plus being in this course meant that you were collaborative, and therefore made you have more friends than usual.

Friends that are quickly disappearing.

You never thought you'd be in a place where your constantly paranoid if your next. Constantly looking and watching.

This feeling washed over you, your feet carrying you to your next class. You walked in and sat in your usual spot, Hoseok already next to you.

He was so energetic when it came to being in such a boring course. He was a dance major and only took the course as something fun. Only to realize he didn't care for the course at all. Instead spending that time to dote on you.

Hoseok always had your seat empty, a bottle of water, and a random snack. Everything about him screamed boyfriend material but you wouldn't want to ruin the bond you built with him. So you kept those feelings to yourself.

As you sat down Hoseok leaned over and wrapped his arm around your neck, pushing you closer too him. “You look cold, what did I tell you about bringing a jacket?” Hoseok immediately went to his doting antics.

“Sorry Hoseok, my mind has been… just everywhere.” You said leaning into the man's touch. “Everyone I know is going missing Hoseok. And I can't help but think is it because of me…”

Hoseok took a deep breath in. His hand rubbed on your shoulder, his head falling on the other. “Dont worry, just keep your mind off of that stuff.” You let out a deep breath, giving a small glace to one your last friends. He gave you a large smile, a signature of his you've grown to love. “Now how about we do the usual and pay absolutely no attention to this class huh?”

You laughed and placed your head on his shoulder. Your head dug into his chest, his body heat transferring to you.

❤️‍🔥

“You like her huh?” Hoseok held a crowbar. He swung at the corpse of one of your close friends. He couldn't even remember her name as he went in. He took another swing at the girls dead corpse.

“You can't have her… she's fucking mine.” He seethed looking at the room he'd made within his apartment. It was just for you, as he's thought of everything. "All... All you guys want is to lay with her and corrupt her beautiful mind."

Who knew that he would keep this going for over a week or two. Even after you told him your worries, he just couldn't stop.

But drawn from his trance his target's phone went off.

“Shit you were supposed to pick up my love tonight huh?” He kneeled towards the body. “Don't worry, I'm gonna go get her alright? I'm ... I got her..."

❤️‍🔥

The sidewalk you walked on was dark. The trees and night sky shaded your journey back to your dorm. Who would've known that the friend that brought you everywhere would end up leaving you alone? This led you to have to walk to your local grocery store and back. The walk wasn't too long, just all depended on the business of the store. More people would mean a longer trip and vice versa.

So whenever a car slowed down next to you, rolling the window down, revealing Hoseok, you were a little more than relieved. “What ya doing all alone out here?” He asked, slowing driving alongside you. His almost white hair shimmered in the moonlight.

“I can't drive and I refuse to take the trolley. So I'm walking.”

Hoseok let out a sigh and put the car in park. “Get in, I'll take you home.” You stared at him before rolling your eyes and opened his car door. As you stepped in his car, something felt off. Immediately it was uncomfortable, the smell was something that stood out. You looked around, closing the door, Hoseok pulling off.

You looked towards the ground seeing a small glimmer of light. As you hit a bump, the phone turned on, showing a picture of you and your friend Maria.

Maria was supposed to pick you up tonight.

You let out a small gasp, Hoseoks face turning towards you. “What's up?”

“Um. Nothing.” You said looking back. The sight before you, nearly made you throw up. Maria's hand separated from her body sat out in the open. The smell was coming from whatever was back there. “I think I want to get out now.”

“Why? You just got in here.” Hoseok said letting out a small chuckle.

“Let me out you fucking murderer!” You yelled going for the car door.

It was locked.

“What are you talking about? I'm- Ohhh.” Hoseok started to chuckle to himself. But he kept driving, passing up the dormitory. You banged on the window, screaming out. Hoseok just kept laughing, taunting you. The entire situation nauseated you. "You were always so smart. That's what drew me to you in the first place."

“I did it all for us. Those people! They only wanted to use you. But I would never do that to you.” He said, hand coming to your bare thigh. You tried to pry his hand off, but he proved to be stronger.

“Your just jealous, and… need help!” You cried as finally he pulled into a miscellaneous driveway. Hoseok put the car in park before smiling at you. His hand went to your face as he grabbed at your arm. You bit at his finger, Hoseok reeking back and hissing. His other hand went to the back of your head, slamming it down on the dashboard knocking you out.

Hoseok smiled leaning over kissing at your head. He'd finally got what he wanted.

Peace.

He hummed a small tune taking in the situation. He was never going to let go of you.

[maochira]

I always have this idea in mind since i started blue lock. Chigiri meeting this person in rehab who is around his age and going through similar situation, they are talented in a sport but they injured themselves. yet they are bonding through this tragedy. Always encourging each other and being positive that they will heal and be able to play again . With time they become close 'friends' and then he went to train in the blue lock. Just after when he is finally able to meet them again and tell them about his 'true feelings' regarding his 'love' for them, and his desire to continue football till the end, he found them given up on their sport, completely ✨🍃 physical wise there was no chance from the beginning but they never told him :( ... how do you think he will handle this whole situation ? I always feel like chigri was traumatised about what happened to his knee and his biggest fear was properly 'giving up', yet here he goes, that fear became true for someone he loves 🍃💫 but then him knowing that they are still mentally suffering while he was mentally healing is ..... you know :( but would he still confess ? But is it a good time tho ? Idk. Somehow i cant imagine the rest 🙊💖 this is not request btw since its too long, i dont mean to annoy you but it would be nice to read your take on this even in a general comment. Sorry for this you can ignore too.

Hi anon!! Your idea is very cool!! I kinda love when people give me their ideas and I get to elaborate or continue ngl.

Masterlist and request rules

tags: gn!reader, kind of angsty I think

The backstory is basically everything in this ask, I'm continuing at the point where they meet again!

-you saw Chigiri play in the U-20 match and while you were proud of him playing like this again, a part of you was hurt because this meant you didn't have the thing you bonded about in common anymore. Also, a part of you is jealous. But you tried to not let those negative feelings get the better of you

-when Chigiri got to leave Blue Lock for a bit, he asked you to meet him again. You were hesitant at first, but then agreed to it

-you invited Chigiri to your place, and he told you a lot about Blue Lock, of course since it's everything that's happened in his life for the past months. You didn't mind him telling you about it, but then he started encouraging you about the sport you used to play, and how you can make it as well because he did

-you try to decline Chigiri's encouragement, but he's so insistent with it, you have no other choice than telling him you're physically not able/allowed to play again

-that really shocks Chigiri and he feels guilty. He apologizes and you try to switch the topic. But the entire situation made spending time with you uncomfortable, so Chigiri went back home very soon

-Chigiri had planned to finally confess his feelings to you that day, but now he felt like he ruined his chance for that. He thought even the friendship between you and him was ruined now

-he couldn't fall asleep that night, he was thinking so much about the moment when you explained how you'll never be able to play your sport again

-and in the next morning you woke up to a message that read "Again, I'm sorry for what I said. I didn't want to hurt you. I love you."

[cannibalismyuri]

way to take things out of context <33 lemme show u some things i said in the actual post that aren't taken out of the connotations i meant to imply them with?

"they also are popular bc they're seen as Better than other creators and put on a pedestal. which is both uncomfortable for them and Highly discouraging for others." this was the whole sentence. way to take things out of context huh.

"many people just disregard other rlly talented creators in favor of the already popular ones (who are popular for a reason. their art / fics / wtv Are really good and i read their stuff too! not trying to put them down here, just trying to lift other people up)" so where in this sentence do u see me saying that they aren't good writers?

"also bragging rights? babe nobody's bragging abt how they get more interaction. that's rude asf and entirely out of the question. and those popular writers ur talking abt who Could brag if they wanted to DON'T. bc they aren't despicable human beings who love to put others down." so did i or did i not clarify that i think the people byler tumblr puts on a pedestal handle it gracefully.

also the way u phrased this is Exactly what's wrong with this fandom. have u ever read anything that wasn't be the 10 writers u idolized? i've found some AMAZING, FREAKISHLY TALENTED, SWEET AND ALL-ROUND LOVELY writers in fandom whom i never would've found if i didn't Specifically try to broaden my horizons. the way you phrased this implies that there is simply nobody who compares to the writers with most engagement and like... how would u know? isn't this exactly the kind of behavior i was saying was Not It? ur putting them on a pedestal and refusing to acknowledge other people, no matter how talented they may or may not be. i'm not saying everybody is an amazing writer right off the bat and that these writers aren't amazing; i'm saying that others may be just as good. i know Several amazing writers eho dont get half the recognition as mediocre writers in other fandoms (NOT! TALKING! ABT! BYLER! HERE!) based on luck and when exactly they post. u guys will never branch out and Try to support these other fic writers who are helping keep this fandom alive and contributing Beautiful fics and then say that the tag is dying just bc UR personal favorite creators aren't creating as much. this doesn't in any way diminish the obvious prowess and skill of the Big writers, bc they're amazing writers and people, but u suggesting that nobody else even comes close? this is NOT nyt bestsellers this is FANDOM. its common courtesy to atleast respect people who write these fics for free and if u can't provide basic respect by trashing others' writing that u haven't even read bc its not one of the Big writer's writing... ur part of the problem.

and im going to say it for the last Fucking time. dont bring my fics or engagement into this. im speaking for so many other people and im trying to demand support for Everyone. this was never just abt me. i said this previously too, but i made a whole ass EVENT to shine light on less popular writers. bylerficrecweek was made for a reason. if it was just abt me and my engagement i never would've wholeheartedly put my whole heart into that project. and don't u Fucking dare insult my writing. "maybe you're not as good at it as you think"? im fucking tired of u coming on my blog, claiming im saying a bunch of BULLSHIT and recontextualizing everything i say and insulting my writing on top of that. you won't see this bc ive blocked u now but. im genuinely so fucking tired. im turning off anon. clearly who ever is sending these has a problem with me personally; so say it with your whole pussy to my face now. ok thx and im Really Fucking Tired please read the post for what its meant to be before mindlessly accusing me of shit.

[elviraaxen]

im new here, so im sorry if this is a question youve answered before but tumblr's search bar failed me in finding this to be previous answered but.. uhmmm

c... can we make ocs/personas for Felt World? or would you rather we not or we hold off until further in?? bc i would love to make a puppet give our cowboy a smooch before he is, i assume bc he is a fucking catch and a half, taken off the market in canon lol i assume he wont still be single by the end. im a tad bit too embarrassed to ever post such drawings, but i wanted to know in case i ever did become brave enough to make them public if such you would be welcome to be tagged in or if that would make you feel uncomfortable

and also, for that purpose: as someone with disabilities, im really curious how disabilities are translated into Felt World? obviously not all of them, that'd take forever. but i was curious if they use mobility aids just like ours or if they use ones we could not have (an example of what i mean could be like "seal-chairs" in "Witch Hat Atelier"? they are chairs with hooves that run and jump, as opposed to wheels). and i know you said music is really powerful in this world, in both singing and instruments, but i wanted to also ask how in a world with so much focus on sound are the deaf/hard of hearing accomadated? deaf/HoH people can still play instruments, obviously (the most famous example being Beethoven), but i meant other than that

(also, if i recall accurately you once said that "the puppets have to speak to be considered sentient beings"? i was wondering if in the future could that be amended to "have to be able to communicate"? because i assume nonverbal puppets would still exist, as well as puppets who just dont speak much (whether thats a facet of deafness or nonspeaking shutdown or just a quiet personality). or would that break Felt World's world-building's logic in some way? that's a genuine question. i wasnt sure how to word it in a way that would minimize the risk of one being put on their back-foot, but i tried my best, it really is a genuine question)

(also, because i never like to assume fluency in disability-knowledge: if you need a resource on media portrayals of disability at any point, i highly recommend the youtuber, Oakwyrm. they do a lot of really cool analysis videos on disability. i do apologize if i am overstepping, and you are already largely fluent in disabled portrayals in media and/or already aware of Oakwyrm's existence. i just like to shout at least one resource out because i know many people have no idea where to look to learn more about general disability representation advice and whatnot. you do not have to watch their videos if you do not want to ♡)

also a bit of a tangent, idk if this is just a "for now" aspect of Donna due to her adjusting or if this is a core pillar of her personality but... just, thank you for making a feminine character who cries a lot and is emotional with Big Feelings. ive always felt more connected to the Dorthy Gales, Cinderellas, Clarisse de Cagliostros kind of heroines who are a bit of a "damsel in distress" (tho i do think that term reduces a lot of their agency and bravery) and i feel a bit lonely that we dont see many emotional-vitality-driven heroines who need some help as much as badass heroines or sassy heroines, both of whom are fully capable of getting shit sone alone. makes my cry-baby disabled ass feel a little pathetic (im very physically weak because of my chronic health issues, and am the type of Autistic ADHDer who is very sensitive to getting big feelings), even tho i know those types of heroines are valid and needed. i resonate a lot with AJR's lyric about "But I'm weak. And what's wrong with that?" even though i know im taking it out of context

and im sure Donna will prove herself capable of being on her own and having her own agency, same as all the heroines ive listed, i dont assume she will be stagnant, but i just wanted to really thank you for making a character that i relate to. i dont get that often. it makes me feel a bit abnormal and strange, and i mean moreso than the "well youre neurodivergent and sickly" kind of abnormal that would be implied. like. Weird Kid sitting alone at lunch kind of strange. so its really cool to see Donna and feel less lonely, is what im saying. i wish there were more heroines like her for people like me nowadays, rather than the archetype being reduced to "archiac stereotypes" (which i both do and dont understand the logic of. it depends on context and the example given) and therefore shelving a type of heroine we dont see in a lot of contemporary media (in exchange for a heroine we didnt get to see often (if at all) in past media, the sassy and badass ones, i do get it, and im glad theyre being used more as they should have always been. there are a select few of both camps that feel like "women have to be as stereotypically masculine as possible to be worthy of being called 'a strong character'" when i think strong characters have less to do with personality and more to do with "do they direct the narrative's plot? do they have agency?". but i could be wrong about that and i am getting off-topic)

but yeah. just. overall: thank you for introducing Donna to be like she is. it means a lot to me to see a heroine like her in contemporary media. im really excited to see what youll do next ♡ but yeah, i know im babbling a lot here and you dont need to reply to this half, i just really wanted to stress my thanks and WHY you have my thanks ♡♡♡ i really appreciate having Donna sit at my metaphorical lunch-table with me, even if she has to go sit somewhere else later. its been really nice to be beside her

thank you ♡

ps. i wasnt sure how to format this Ask because i know some people like to have each section have their own Ask for compartmentalizing/tag-organization reasons, but others like it all to be together so they know its all from one person as opposed to the anxiety of "ahh why did i get so many Asks all at once, did i do something wrong, do people hate me-- oh. its fine. i went through that rollercoaster for nothing. dear lord, am i drained now". so i tend to rather assume the latter, just in case; but do feel free to screenshot and section these out into their own posts if you are the former, i wont mind if youd rather do that ♡ have a nice day!!

Oh my goodness what a long message!!! 0.0!!

I had to take a few hours to think about everything to make sure I answered everything. But I should start off by showing my gratitude for the amount of time and effort you put into formulating this! So thank you, this was a really cool ask to receive <3

As for OCs, absolutely you can! I've already had a few who've made theirs, and I have no rules at all when it comes to shipping or self inserts or anything, as long as everyone is being respectful towards each other ^^

As for the disability aspect, I have a few key points that I want to explore in regards to especially deafness and muteness (is it called that? muteness?), but that's further along the story and will be introduced later! Also how song vs instruments work in this world is a part of the lore itself that'll be explained further down the line too, so no need to worry about our fellow mute or deaf/hoh peeps!

I have of course thought about mobility aids and other disability accommodations (because they can be born with defect, illnesses, and be injured pretty much like us, their bodies are a bit more fantastical but there are still rules) but i must admit didn't think further other than to give them similar mobility aids that we use. But clearly it would make more sense to make something more fantastical! I'll give it a thought! That's probably gonna be a fun design exercise ^^

I'm not sure if I can answer the entire ask in a way that does it justice, it's quite frankly the coolest message I've gotten, I'm gonna try and not let it get to my head (lol),

but i'm so glad you and seemingly many others seem to like Donna and appreciate her specifically for being sensitive and reacting strongly. It shouldn't be but it's really daunting to write female leads because as we know people just don't like women in media generally, but I eventually just got over it because I realized I was starting to write a character that demanded the audience cared and respected, rather than showing a story that I had fun telling, in a world worth exploring.

And not to spoil but I've already decided I do not want Donna to go through an arc where she's forced to abandon her emotions or go through something physically traumatic in order to "become tough" to be respected, that's not only overdone but lame and harmful wish fulfillment. So no worries in that department!

But anyways, I don't think I can properly say how appreciative I am of this ask!!! It really warms my heart that you and other people are going out of your way to send me asks about my little story that I came up with on a whim!!! It's truly the best compliment as a creator.

<3

[beebundt]

fwiw that rude commenter is a transphobe, a post a few down on their blog is real blatant (and in that vein I think their comment was less a judgement of your anatomy and more saying Charlie is 'too' muscular/angular)

It's rude and out of pocket REGARDLESS but I also think you're a little hard on yourself! You even said, you hadn't illustrated exactly what you were after with her, and you hadn't intended for a collection of doodles you happened to still like to blow up. You're entirely right that we should all be drawing more than conventionally attractive people, but idk. It's a process and you're a great artist who's working toward it! Don't feel like you have to answer this btw I mostly wanted to let you know that commenter was a double idiot and started rambling. Hope you have a lovely day!!

oh absolutely! i have a feeling you're right abt what they meant considering i saw the transphobic comment they made a couple posts down on their blog lmao but i wanted to add that part anyway. and i appreciate your words a ton, but dw im not hurt or upset! i get a lot of weird comments all the time, i just wanted to use that one as a platform to bounce off of a thought ive been having lately. i wouldn't post a negative remark like that unless i wanted to use it for something. the actual comment was mostly irrelevant to the point i wanted to make, which is also not meant to be super serious, just a thought soup to stir around

and i mean my interpretation of my art as purely objective, i think its important to think critically about yourself and in general. from an objective standpoint, i dont believe the way shes drawn is too out of the norm and is fairly tame (disregarding her ox/bull parts lol), thats basically what i was aiming for with that section. i constantly get stuck in a rut without improving by much because im usually just drawing to doodle after a school day and not rlly with any purpose. i tend to keep drawing the same things out of habit and it gets stale really quickly. so i know my faults and im rlly looking forward to getting better!

also rq, what you said about how we need to draw more than conventionally attractive people- while i do agree with that, in my post i was more saying its important for people to be more open-minded about how they view gender expression and attractiveness in general, myself included! i dont think how i drew charlie was very revolutionary, but ive seen so many tags speaking otherwise. which is either reflective of how small the bubble is for whats acceptable or maybe i have a skewed perception of things? for example if having a bush or something is gender envy we need to look at ourselves. bush is so normal to me. (which i dont if thats what even drew ppl to it BUT. just as an example). would those same people say the same if i drew a very fat woman with a beard, unibrow, etc.? i have no idea. but i have had my eyes opened so many times before its incredible. little things ive never thought about before through new perspective. so thats why i want to encourage it too. i hope that makes sense. thank you so much i hope you have an equally lovely day!! 🫶🫶

[cerealmonster15]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

ty for the tag @unpredictable-probabilities! I don't usually do tag things but I'm feeling an exception today and I want to ramble lol let's GO!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Right now, 51! I think i started using ao3 back in college with rvb fic lol. I've since orphaned 2 fics so I guess there wouldve been 53.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

86,956

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Right now, mostly just Twisted Wonderland (and the occasional dndads, I still have a fic in my brain I kinda wanna write for that). Twst was kinda my comeback to wanting to write fics and has been my main inspiration for a lot of things and it's been the most fun i've had writing fics I think, and it's eventually what's gotten me to try to write my first multi chapter fic.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. Slip Ups and Lift Ups (Stardew Valley) 444 Kudos 2. A Fishy Intervention (TWST) 354 Kudos 3. Company (TWST) 249 Kudos 4. Security Cauldron (TWST) 248 Kudos [my first twst fic i think? also has some errors in it teehee oopsie] 5. Because I Care (TWST) 234 Kudos

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes!!! I think I didn't used to? Maybe because I felt weird about my own comments changing the comment count and like it was somehow lying lol. but that's silly and i like talking to people and I Need people to Know that i Love Their Comments

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

hmmm I do not write much angst, and even when I do it's more hurt/comfort, bc permasads make ME permasad. I think it was my rvb fic "forgotten" - which i always forget was my first fic uploaded to ao3 LOL, back in 2015. ironic that my first wasnt reflective of the tone i usually write for. i don't wanna reread it to check [even tho my fics from back then are WAY shorter] bc im scared to face how i wrote when i was fresh outta hs lol BUT if i remember correctly/based on the summary, it was a doc/donut fic and I think it was about how after doc had disappeared from the future cube or whatever in canon and no one knew he was gone, i wrote a scene of doc getting upset with donut bc Of All People Why Didnt You Notice I Thought I Meant Something To You 😔 kdlsjfkdlsj i think it ended with doc walking off and donut being SAD and idk maybe they broke up, idr if they were 'officially dating' in the context of that fic. but um hashtag docnut for life.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

most all of my fics are happy endings with an exception of like one ^ or two lol. I don't know if i can quantify those!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not to my face if I do lol. I don't think enough people know about me to give a shit if i do stuff they dont like

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

nope!!!! i dont really like smut personally and it's not the kind of genre i have story ideas for.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I don't think i've ever done that 🤔

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that I know of!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

not that I know of!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

nope!

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

girl help i cannot choose. um. well first shout out again to rvb's docnut bc u will always be strong and married in my heart. and in dndads im an oakworthy truther til i die BUT for twst. twst beloved twst i am in that pitfall of i like 50000 different ships. jamiazu is the one i write and draw the most LOL and theyre def a top fave HOWEVER. god. treycater alters my brain chemistry. rookvil marriage real. adeuce beloved fool duo for life. im physically restraining myself from mentioning more KLFJDSKLFJS especially when we get into the multiship/poly web bc god we will be here all day. i can and will be enabled but this post is already long enough GOODBYE!!!!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

oooh ok well there was a dndads oakworthy thing I started like last year but pretty soon after I started it, we started seeing more of hermies forbidden other 'true' personality traits and i was like ruh roh this guy keeps pulling a fast one on me, i dont think the direction i had with this fic is fitting anymore. i had barely gotten anywhere with it and it wouldve been short anyway, but i think about what couldve been.... lololol and then for TWST umm. Hehe. Teehee even. Back during nanowrimo I used that as time to start 2 fics: kalim and the great relationship rescue, which is my current multichap fic about kalisil and jamiazu, it’s got about 3 chapters, and I’m still writing it. AND IM STILL GOING TO FINISH THAT ONE!!! but the OTHER one I started during that time and have NOT posted any of it yet was the stuff with my first twst oc, Char, and his place in my big caterella multiverse ideas lol. I’ve posted a bit about that story idea and done a lot of doodles and brianstorming for it, but I fear it would be too intimidatingly ambitious to stick to and I’m not sure writing one concrete fic is the right medium for it 🤔 plus I just don’t think many people would like it much LOL it would be very self indulgent and tapping into my soap opera brain. I feel nervous when I talk about it HAHDBFNTG so I’m not sure I could commit. But I still have what I wrote, and maybe I’ll figure out another way to go with it or maybe I’ll just wake up one day and say WHATEVER and write it anyway lol. I’ve gotten shyer again so we’ll see 🧍

16. What are your writing strengths?

umm. i do not know if it is a strength but i feel more light comedy and dialogue come more 'naturally' to me, but i do not know how well i actually can pull it off LOL also shorter, contained stories. Everything I write is a one shot, and I’m struggling on my recent attempt at a multiple chapter fic BDBFFBFNGD

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

hrhrnrngm more descriptive writing, i find im in the pitfalls of writing TOO MUCH dialogue. and i also feel like when i try to do more serious tone things it comes off as cringe or trying too hard kFDKLSHFLDSJ. no one's said that to me but yknow. fear and whatnot. also ending the story is. Hard. I feel like that’s always a weak part of my fics bc I sit there like WELL I WROTE ALL MY IDEAS HOW DO I WRAP THIS UP…. I worry my endings come off kind of half assed but I do my best lol 😔✌️

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

like are you asking if i would do it? or how i feel when it's done in fics i read? i dunno lol. i could maybe do spanish bc ive studied it a lot but i'd get nervous i think.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

on ao3 it was rvb bu teeeechnically back in my neoseeker forums days i was in there writing like, animal crossing or harvest moon or pokemon stuff. it was very bad bc i was like 10 years old LOL

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

ohoho ummmm. Well I always have fun writing jamiazu and I’ve written a LOT of those lol. I have a soft spot for The Comfort of Familiarity. That’s one of the ones hats taken me the longest to write because I was really trying hard to handle it with care, as it was a less light tone than I typically do and I was trying to explore the characters and their situation in a particular way that I really wanted to come across well with who reads it. It was hard, and I’m not sure I fully got there, but ultimately I did like it quite a a bit. on the flipside, one of my more recent fics and I think now my longest oneshot to date, Blue Raspberry Mango was VERY fun to write lol. That one’s a lot more like what I typically write, silly romcom style lmao. Cater and Idia goofing, characters bickering, friendship, me trying to sneak in as many side ships into the background for funsies, jamiazu is there, it was a good time. And that one started as a prompt suggestion which I feel like often times I end up struggling with and not delivering super well… but this one ran away from me and I had a blast lol. Idikei fixed me 😌✌️

Ty for tagging me! Umm. I am too scared to tag other people 🧍 goodbye jk @officialgleamstar 🫵 You Do It

[sorry if I missed any typos or autocorrect, part of this was on my phone and I always miss SOMETHING lol]

[bluravenite]

hey Raven! I love your work so much 🖤 Your Zephyr is gorgeous!! I was wondering what the ‘wrong kind of attention’ means so I know how to best interact with your art. I would never want to make you uncomfy (even if it is unintentional).

This is really sweet! Thank you for considering that 💖💖

It wasn't anyone's fault, rather I entered the fandom when I was still in school and as you know the ghost fandom is pretty NSFW all around, so I initially decided to create my own ghoul designs which were awful at first, and when I finally had good designs I had started gaining attention for my ifrit and mountain drawings, some of which were suggestive or based on more suggestive fanfics (I wanna point out that I wasn't a minor at this time, but I was still a student and pretty young compared to most people in the fandom space) so the nature of those interactions was immature and at times naive because I had no idea I was supposed to have set boundaries with people and the content I saw.

During this I also went through some major life changes, I got my degree, and I left several relationships that were hurting me, and I decided to go on hiatus and distance myself from the fandom space in order to heal and focus on making art for my enjoyment and not as a chore or duty.

But having my ghoul art up meant people still replied to that old nsfw content with the same energy, and I wasn't very comfortable with that anymore so I just took it down for the time being 💖

I am more than happy to draw my ghouls again, and in fact I may make some more official character sheets if time allows, meanwhile I'll still post updates of my art projects and such :)

If I ever see something that makes me uncomfortable, I will likely just mention it, I'll always be polite and direct in a dm and ask whoever to please remove the tag or comment or something, and explain why it may have upset me, and likely just delete an anon or reply it privately, so please dont ever worry about making me uncomfortable unintentionally, i get it happens sometimes, so I will always try to be sensible and understanding when dealing with stuff that makes me uncomfortable!

[steak-ns]

needed to get this off my chest b4 i rot from the inside out

i dont know if this will reach the target audience that i want but (t) at this point nothing is going to stop me

===

basically i've seen a lot, and i mean a lot of drabbles or fics or whatever they are called, of perv! eddie munson, and steve harrington, and like a few billy hargove pieces. and maybe one or two perv! reader pieces that aren't meant for me, because i am a girl (of age! to be reading and writing this) and the pieces are meant for guys.

but whatever.

the point is that how can anyone write smuttty pieces of billy without ever mentioning his spectacular butt. just look!

how can you just not want to bite and suck marks at the cheeks and praise and love and show off this whole bakery!

and okay enough of that.

i want to get to the horrible (not as bad as i thought) stuff that i need to put down. so tags and warnings will be added here!

SEMI CONTENT WARNING: penetration for the reader

tag: perv! reader, mentions of exhibition (basically wanting to get caught), gross! reader, bathroom s*x (no touching the cake yet :/ unfortunately), s*x without a cond*m, plse have safe s*x peoples!, mentions of drinking, smoking, han*jobs, bl*wjobs, stealing clothing items, watching someone sleep, almost getting caught at peeking (ha), 3-4 am writings, lowercase intended, not proof read, somehow it ended up with me praising him, OOC! billy (maybe idk) (most likely, dialogue sucks)

to those interested, what i had in mind was a reader (totally did not decide to finally write this when writing a fic with a similar sort of reader) that has a friend with benefits deal with billy. haven't decided on romance (maybe no romance cus it kills the vibes)

just imagining getting to know the californian transfer better than anyone else (not completely, he's keeping you at football field length of his home life) seeing him as a close friend, and maybe he sees you at the same wave but he ain't admitting anything

just like you won't ever admit that the whole reason you even started to talk to him (you totes made the first move on the new guy which was not appreciated by many) was because you just saw a glimpse of the cake on him. you don't even want to talk about having the same p.e. class as him. getting to see him in those sickening shorts on him, and without a shirt! a so added bonus on your book

you can ogle and stare, not too much tho, can't show yourself as a creep just yet! or ever, but your stare can never be hidden too long

and after befriending him over whatever you could to get close to him, the both of you are at a party (even if you weren't exactly keen on going to tina's party but he was going to be there, how much more convincing can it get?)

so after bumping into him on accident, the two of you are now in a bathroom. lips and bodies practically glued together with an arm of his on your waist and the other on your neck to prevent you from pulling away (as if, oh and the taste of the beer that still lingered in his mouth had your knees weak which he could mistake you being turned on by the hand that used to lay on your waist that is now settling on the front your bottom half)

which yeah that too has you weak in the knees, but getting a taste of something that was already in his mouth, it was just... it made butterflies explode in your stomach

but the feeling could only last for so long, as you both had to pull apart (read billy) for air. you obvi chased after his mouth, and he could have laughed if it weren't for the fact that you were able to last longer than him in kissing

you are severely desperate for something, and he is so not going to give it to you easily now. and that's fine, you could play the desperate brat he could be into (at least until you get just the one nibble on the cake)

you're moving your hips against one of his jean cladded thighs of his, he's letting you with what you can assume to be light blush (probably due to the lack of oxygen a moment ago, but it gets you going, having built a fantasy of him getting the blush differently) on his face and a smirk that has you begging (vocal) him to just take you. like now. like right now

and okay maybe you underestimated his size, and if either he would be rough or gentle (you thought you had garnered positive points for being a friend of sorts to him) but it doesn't matter anymore. you had pushed yourself to sit on the sink with your legs wide open (who knew your legs can stretch that far? you didn't) underwear somewhere on your ankle (i didn't know if i should have mentioned pants or shorts or if imagining a dress, considering the latter gives easier access, but you had undies)

you feel him moving, and all you could do was throw your head back with a darn smile on your face. he's sweaty and using your hole like a fleshlight and the only thought in your head was that you are a step closer to your goal.

his lips are on you again and he's getting aggressive as you get loud. you might as well become the music. geezus

he's stuffing two fingers in your mouth, saliva running down your lips as you gag and tighten both mouth and hole as he angled his hips to go deeper when you are moved to be a little closer to falling off the sink

you hear him tell you stuff but you can't answer. he removes his fingers and wipes them on your cheek and you can't help it when your eyes roll to the back of your head as he wraps both arms around your upper torso. you nearly came when you got a whiff of his sweaty musk

you hear him say if you want to be caught like this, to which you can only reply before tightening around his dick

"let them! let them see that you're the only that can make me feel this good!"

you so messed up by saying that because now he's slamming his hips against your ass and kissing you and you return the kiss with whatever sense of control of brain you had left. goal long forgotten

this time you pull away when you cum and a second later he does too. your arms wrapped around his shoulders, his neck becoming so inviting as his sweat glistens under the bathroom light

now you're pulling your underwear up, letting the band snap against your skin as you get down on your knees in front of him. feeling him getting hard again as you give him a handjob because you never thought you were this dirty. your thighs rubbing together as you practically drool at the sweat that was on his thighs

giving a kitty lick on his tip before he's grabbing the back of your head and making your mouth take all of him. you're moaning (gagging first if you got gag reflexes) when your hands are perched on his very slight hairy legs. you don't even care about tasting yourself, your goal back in action

spoke too soon. the grip on your head was stilled (he was moving your head, now becoming a literal fleshlight) as he moved his hips to his liking and he's cumming down your throat

you swallow every last bit as if it were your last meal and licking his dick as he pulls away from your mouth. you finally (reluctantly) pull your head away from him. you're opening your mouth to show him that it's all gone (of course it is, it's his)

he seemed to have softened up a bit, and so have your legs as your try to stand. like the real gentleman that he is, he laughs then helps you up. you so won't tell him that you came a second timr at the thought of being an inanimate object to him

===

fast forward weeks, it's now the second day of christmas break and you've had more than once some special fun with billy. speaking of him

he was on your bed, on his stomach with shorts cus there is no way you are going to wait until summer for the heat to make billy wear shorts (you made sure your house was slightly warmer for his standards)

you stood at your doorway, admiring the absolute unit of an ass that he has. he takes notice of you and raises a brow at your outfit. and okay so maybe it was hot for him, but it was warm for you. and now you're dressed in a pair of egg sweatpants and a "kiss the jock" sweater that was pink and unfortunately tight around your torso but loose and long enough in the sleeves. now you can line up and smack all the empty beer cans that he leaves behind

you, still in a daze of finally seeing him in shorts outside of the school, could only mutter the one single word that can be taken at a completely different path with zero context

"ass."

and you do exactly what you wanted to do (not goal), you picked up all the beer cans and have them stand on the bed frame at the end of the bed and you so want to line a few on him

and as if all the winds were against you, he had turned over to lay at his side to stare at whatever your sleep deprived brain wanted to do

there's a trash bin on your right and you manage to get a few in (as in few as in like five) and billy watches you for a hot minute before he obnoxiously yawned and stated that he was going to take a nap, with a smirk on his face as you glared

because who does he think he is! does he think that he can make fun of you by saying that he's going to nap when you've gotten a full day of no sleep (granted he does not know that, and he's not going to) and expect you to not do anything to earn negative points? then you're absolutely right. you wouldn't disturb this man when the scrunch of eyebrows is finally relaxed. not even a scowl to the face (an angel face if you will)

he's baby and you get out of your room to do laundry (cough cough something that is only seen by men, and you totally understand like about 3% on why it's done) with the laundry bin, both yours and billy's clothes in it. you rummage through to find the one thing you've been hoping to find since all the others were already washed and cleaned, every thursday because it's two people and you're not that messy)

you hide the briefs in a space that no one knows about (as you should) and continue as if you hadn't stolen another clothing piece of his. well, it's his fault really. leaving his clothes behind as if he wanted you use the already used pieces of clothes for your own pleasure (first step is acceptance)

when you're done loading the washing machine, you move back to your room. billy is still asleep, in a fortunate ballerina sleeping position. his feet covered by a blanket that reaches just his calves (is it that hot? nah)

now you wish you had a camera. you need to keep this moment forever. how has he gotten comfortable enough around you, to... to sleep in such a way! (making a mental note to get one)

you're quietly groaning in your bundled sleeves at the way the shorts stretch on his ass and thighs. how his shirt is lifted a little and you could see a small part of his happy trail. it's really almost like he knows what he's doing

well, he could. he's not dumb. but that's a thought for another day

you move quietly to stand at the foot of your bed. spectacular. magnificent. marvelous

maybe you shouldn't leave the thought for another day, and leave the room before he completely wakes up. you say this because he's moved around as if to get comfortable, but you already know that he's waking up

it comes with the added benefits when staring at someone sleep at every chance you could get (you never know what could happen)

you go to leave your room to go to the kitchen... for something. you definitely needed to leave

"now where do you think you're going after staring at me for an hour?"

his voice caught you off guard, you don't jump (because you knew), now you're at your doorway again, staring at him with a relaxed expression

"it was not an hour."

the words leave your mouth before you fully see where this was going. cursing under your breath before taking a full glance at him. at his whole body. at him lighting up a cigarette

"you're just a little freak then, huh?"

crossing your arms and you walked towards him with no stutter to your steps. he's no longer lying down; his back is leaning on the headboard and his eyes don't leave your form

you sat on your bed, besides his outstretched legs. a knee under you as you pluck the cigarette that he's already using

"you have no idea what your body does to me."

you blow some smoke towards his face and there wasn't much of a reaction on top. down below though, your response definitely woke something up

"you are so fucking attractive, hargrove. so so attractive."

your face inched closer to his

"from the way your eyelashes frame your sky-blue eyes to the way your mouth stretches in that tiny smile of yours."

ignoring the way a few recognizable (albeit still different) butterflies return as your hands are on his shoulders after he took the cigarette back. only to burn it out and his arms stayed at his sides. with a roll of his eyes, he huffed

"and there is definitely something you love more about me than what you are saying."

you smiled and lowered your hands to his chest before wrapping your arms around his torso. bringing your head down to where his heart should be

"i really, really like the way sweat looks on you. and your chest. and maybe i do love your ass more than you, but i call it even when you are always putting your baby above me."

it brings out a short laugh and you hugged him closer

"i actually like that laugh of yours, where i know you are totally having fun. i like your music taste, and somehow the volume too. i like the fact that my room is becoming ours. and i like being your friend. and that you left me a seashell on my nightstand one day."

he had stiffened and you tried to cool your rapid heartbeat. this is so much worse.

"and i kind of really like you." (I LIED! ROMANCE FOR THIS MAN. I was sucked in the billy hargrove deserves better hashtag earlier today and he DESERVES ALL OF MY LOVE)

"of course you do."

he pulled you closer as you straddled his hips.

"i could list off all the things i like about you as a friend."

you suggested with a small sniff on his neck. one that he ignored in your eyes. (totes not unnoticed)

"do not."

[matan4il]

Hey question… and I dont know if this might be a spoiler for you or if you still watch lonestar but why are people saying TK saying this when giving Carlos his ring is Jewish rep? I’m just curious if this is some sort of thing Jewish individual do? Thank you:)

TK to Carlos when exchanging rings:

“With this ring you are made holy to me. For I do love you as my soul. You are now my husband.”

Hi Nonnie! Thank you for the ask.

TBH, I haven't caught up with Lone Star yet. I want to, I've been wanting to see what Jewish rep they'll include in the Tarlos wedding since we knew there would be one. But the little I saw of s4 was disappointing in that context, so I find I'm in no rush to actually catch up with the show when I'm already very stressed over rl. I will, though.

For now, what Jews say during a Jewish wedding in order for it to be binding is, "With this ring you are made holy to me in accordance with the religion of Moses and Israel." Since TK didn't say the second part, what he did would not actually take. I'm also guessing that "For I do love you as my soul" is meant to be a paraphrase of the verse in the bible describing Jonathan's love for David: "And so it was, as he finished speaking to Shaul, and the soul of Yehonatan was tied to the soul of David, and Yehonatan loved him as his [own] soul." If I'm right, it's a nice connection to an important Jewish LGBTQ love story in the Bible. But if you ask me, this is sort of... half hearted Jewish rep. Why drop the part with the religion of Moses and Israel? Without those words, what TK said has no value. It's like doing the kind of wedding ceremony that was developed in the Christian world, putting in there all the traditions you're familiar with, but then NOT having the spouses say "I do" to each other. It would feel lacking. The part with the vow, the words that reflect commitment according to tradition, are missing. It would feel wrong to you, right? So that's how I feel, learning TK said only half of the Jewish wedding vow.

I guess the bottom line is that to me, that sounds like Jewish rep, but once again, it's just... not actually good Jewish rep. I hope I helped and that this makes sense? Thank you and have a great day, lovely. As always, my ask tag. xoxox

[buffysummers]

hi! those are my tags on your xander gifset. i have followed you for a long time & am pretty familiar with your opinions and the things you make (and am a massive fan of the vast majority of both!!!) and i know you obviously dont just pick the most memeable moments for the alphabet sets!! but i did just wanna message you to kinda stand by what i said -- the xander set specifically (and ive seen most of them!) i think does excessively highlight his negative qualities. more than half of the gifs are from the first three seasons and almost all the rest are from the seventh--i think xanders flaws (the misogyny, the toxic masculinity, insecurity, possessiveness, etc) are important and you should show them! i love xander so much because of how he grows. but when i say you have his best and worst and your opinion on him shows, i mean i think you chose to dwell on his early shittiness and then add in his best late moments, at the cost of using the gifset to show the growth that happens over the course of seasons 4-6. and i didnt really mean it as a criticism just an observation! and im not trying to fight, just wanted to explain what i was thinking, please take this in good faith. i love your blog and your thoughts and gifing talents make the buffy fandom a better place.

Hi! Thanks so much for saying that 🩷 I definitely did not think you meant to fight, so don't worry! I can be overly sensitive because the Buffy fandom tends to be overly critical of people's work, and often their criticisms are not based on the actual text of the show.

So, I just want to defend why I did that for his set, if you don't mind?

So, Xander's gifset is 18 gifs. Which, is a lot. I am not sure if you make gifsets yourself, but this takes a very, very long time. As you noted, Xander is not my favorite, but I also don't hate Xander. Having said that, I did not particularly enjoy making his set because 1) he is not a fav of mine, and 2) I knew it would flop because a lot of people do hate him. So, it did feel a bit like I was wasting my time because I knew very few people would appreciate the hard work and time I put into making the set.

As for the reasons why I chose those scenes for the set, I will walk you through it since I know you actually like Xander and would perhaps be interested in knowing my thought process behind each gif. (for anyone else who is reading this, I am referring to this set)

I start off every set with an introduction to the character, and more than likely, it's the character's introduction to Buffy, as she is the titular character and it's her show. The only exception is Tara, because while Tara is most definitely important to Buffy (especially in season 6), their development comes later on, and Tara is Willow's girlfriend. (Tara was the only romantic interest character set I did that was not for Buffy. I should also note I only did Angel for Buffy. So, two romantic interests in total.)

I chose this gif for a couple of reasons. The first was to display Xander's willingness to help Buffy, which also displays his bravery. The second was to show his toxic masculinity, how he appears to not only struggle with the idea of a woman being more important/powerful than him, but this is also a deep-rooted issue that we see a lot in the show. Given how important he is to the show, I did not feel the need to show several gifs concerning this trait because it would be overkill.

Xander's main function in the narrative is to serve as Buffy's friend, but he's also the classic "pines over the main character" trope. I thought this moment with the bracelet was sweet. It shows that he cares for her, but it also shows how awkward and nervous he is about potentially displaying those feelings.

Well, this is just a big moment for both characters. Xander, after pining for Buffy for the entire first season, finally admits to his feelings for Buffy. This takes a lot out of him.

A huge heroic moment for Xander, especially since she just rejected him. There were a lot of scenes I could've chosen, like him showing up to Angel's apartment, or him not caring about potentially dying as long as he could help Buffy. Ultimately, I chose what resulted of his bravery, ie: saving Buffy.

I chose this scene for a few reasons. The first is to show his loyalty to Buffy. Out of all the Scoobies, he is the only one to stay with Buffy the entire time she's in the hospital and he guards her room in case Angelus shows up. But, as is the case with a lot of his decisions in the first three seasons, his actions are motivated by his romantic feelings for Buffy. He hated Angel long before Angelus, and he even admits as much. This scene shows Xander's feelings and loyalty to Buffy, while also highlighting his hatred for not only Angelus, but his jealousy regarding Buffy and Angel's relationship. There is a reason why Angelus says this to Xander. He knows this will get under his skin and hurt him the most.

This is perhaps the first gif that truly just highlights his toxicity. Again, his feelings regarding Buffy/Angel and Angelus is his main narrative function in season two. There are (almost) no layers to this scene, in my opinion. He says this because he's jealous. I don't truly believe he cares all that much about Jenny for a lot of reasons, but mostly because of what happens in 7.05. Also, Buffy would never, ever want to simply erase or forget about Jenny's death, especially because of how much she loves Giles. She's also just a very compassionate person. What he says to her is simply untrue, and he only says this to hurt her because, once again, he's jealous.

I mean, this moment is too important to not include in the set. It is the worst thing he does in the entire show. So, even though it piggyback's off of the previous gif, you could say this is him putting his money where his mouth is. Before, he merely voiced his disdain for Angel/Angelus. This is him acting on it. This is him taking his jealousy to an entirely new level. This is pure selfishness.

The Scoobies really, really suck in "Dead Man's Party." They are super dismissive of Buffy's feelings and they minimize her trauma. They are all too concerned with how Buffy's disappearance impacted them, while overlooking where she's been and why she felt the need to flee to begin with. That is not to say the Scoobies's feelings shouldn't be factored in, but this scene perfectly encapsulates the messiness that is this episode. And Xander is by far the worst in this episode, so that is why his set gets the gif. Also, as stated above, Xander's character is very deeply tied to Buffy. He has a richly developed arc, but it mostly revolves around her, unlike Willow.

I tried to include more of the dialogue from this scene, but it covered his entire face and looked ugly. But I do think "I like the quiet" is powerful enough on his own. An outstanding moment for Xander. Such a great episode, overall.

This is so, so sweet and also shows you how much Xander has grown. It also highlights his emotional intelligence, which we haven't seen a lot of at this point in the series. Could this have to do with Angel leaving? Maybe. But he sees that Buffy is down, and takes the time to pick her up and support her. It's a wonderful friend moment.

I don't think this needs to be explained much. He saved the world. A courageous moment and this also displays his emotional intelligence and his ability to reach people.

I included this gif because 1) it's funny and 2) it's a good piece of exposition.

This is him reflecting on his years in high school and showing appreciation. A very good moment for him.

Supporting another Summers sister while also providing good exposition on his narrative purpose.

We all know he's the comic relief, so I thought it was best to include at least one gif that states that.

This shows his bravery once again. He lost an eye, he has no special powers, but hey, he still wants to go down fighting standing next to the woman he loves. (I still believe he is in love with Buffy. Fight me!) This scene is also reminiscent of when he followed her in 1.02, 1.12, and when he and Willow wanted to look for Buffy in 2.14.

This is a cute moment between them, and also very true. He brought Buffy back to life twice, and he also played a huge part in why she survives after Warren shot her.

So, while I agree that there's a lot of gifs from seasons 1-3, and 7, I think this set accurately encapsulates his function within the show's narrative. I did not include any gif from season 5, it is the only season that did not get a gif. And I thought a lot about that season. I could have included his relationship with Anya, or maybe his career taking off, but I just don't think that is as important as his relationship with Buffy and Willow.

If you look at Willow's set, for instance, there's a lot from season 6 because that's her season. I think Xander serves the narrative more in the early seasons, and in the final season, which is where he's at his best.

I did my best with the set, and I think I did a good job, even if you maybe don't agree with me. I hope you have a better understanding of the set now!