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zeldasnotes · 1 year

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LILITH NOTES PART. 5

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

These are my personal observations and not facts!

Check out my MASTERLIST for more posts about Lilith and other asteroids.

•Barack Obama got Lilith conjunct Mercury 0° orb and he is so incredibly funny and videos of his speeches always go viral and leaves people in shock (in a positive way). The way he introduced himself as ”Michelles husband”. I think Lilith conjunct Mercury is a sign of high intelligence and people reacting strongly to what you say.

•People with Lilith in hard aspect to Sun can get into a lot of conflicts in their lifes because they feel a strong need to express their honest feelings. Its a part of who they are and they wont back down.

•Lilith trine/sextile Mars makes someone very strategic.

•People with conjunctions/squares to Lilith might become mean at one point in their life because people always saw them as bad anyways so why not? People are gonna hate anyways you might aswell give them a reason.

•Most Lilith dominants I know are super independent, and from a young age. Like started working early in their life, doing stuff on their own, having their own company etc.

•Lilith dominant women experience a lot of complicated love/hate situations with men because men find them intriguing but at the same time finds it hard to genuinely ”like” the Lilith woman since he feels threathened by her. Which leads to being mean to her while being obsessed with her.

•Biggie Smalls having Lilith in the 8th house and being not only accused of his best friends death but also being killed himself.😔

•Lilith just like Pluto can turn out differently in a chart based on how you use that power and what other aspects you have in your chart. Just like Pluto you NEED to take control where your Lilith is OR you will be controlled. With Lilith in hard aspect to Sun or Ascendant you need to show dominance bc people will want to put you down otherwise. With Moon conjunct Lilith you might need to be a b*tch towards other women or they will victimize YOU. Moon conjunct Lilith is common in peoples chart who gets hated on by other women but its also common in people like Beyonce, she got Moon conjunct Lilith and women worship her because she got that dominant powerwoman persona.

•Lilith Square/Opposite/Conjunct Moon can also show that you subconsciously got a bad view on women but as you grew up it changes when you learn how its actually society pitting us against eachother. Look at how Beyonce used to behave towards other women 20 years ago when she was in Destinys Child and made the song ”n*sty girl”. Well she was young but anyways she wasnt always a powerwoman. (all women are powerwomen in my eyes btw but you get what I mean)

•Rachel McAdams have played sooo many bitchy popular girl roles and in the movie Passion she plays a psychopath. She got Lilith conjunct Midheaven Square Ascendant so it makes sense that she got a raw look that works perfectly for roles like that.

•Angelina Jolie got Lilith in the 8th house Square Sun and I cant help but laugh because she doesnt even care when people call her creepy and scary. Like she be unbothered as hell💀

•Sad Observation: If a guys Lilith is conjunct your Moon he might not show as much interest in you when he is single but be hell bent on sleeping with you when he is in a relationship. He might like the idea of you being his side piece. But in a lot of cases if he is not a disgusting guy like the ones i just describe it can be the opposite, that he is the one who finally sees you for who you really are and loves you and understands the pain you go through like with pluto/moon.

•Ive never met a Lilith dominant person, no matter age that were not super intelligent.

•Also with Moon harshly aspecting Lilith there is a sense of having to fight hard for everything they got. Leading to them always being emotionally ready for a battle and having to suppress their emotions. Just like with Moon/Pluto.

•If you are someone whos usually not intense, not into sex outside of a relationship etc that will change when you meet someone whos planets aspects your Lilith. Especially if its their Venus/Moon. Read more about Lilith in synastry on @corvoideas post HERE

•I was friends with two girls who had Moon conjunct Lilith in Libra. Their moms borrowed their clothes, got involved in their petty teendrama, were obsessive and rude towards their friends. Very weird relationship to their moms. Their moms also had them very young which explains some of the competition.

•If you have Lilith in the 2nd house be careful with people who will try to use you for your money you give off the impression of being financially stable even if you are not. I have friends with this aspect and they all attract men with huge debts. One of them were with a man who had half a million in debt and no job. He wanted my friend to take care of him. People want to take from you and could feel a right to do so.

•When you have Lilith in the 2nd house people view you as someone who got too much. Too much beauty, too much money, too much fame. People are obsessed with what you have so they get close to you to either take it or ruin it for you. Be picky because this is a placement that attracts crazy amounts of envy.

•I know so many men with Lilith in the 10th house who have a reputation for being a douchebag/promiscuous etc. Might also be falsely accused of s*xual assault. I know of a guy with this aspect who is known in our town for sleeping with over 100 guys.

•I know of another guy who got Lilith conjunct his Sun and he got accused of being a ”snitch” and outcasted by the men in his neighbourhood because of this. Lilith dominants really gets to see the worst side of society.

•I know Ive said it before but damn Lilith in the 12th house people are sooo good at hiding their Lilith side. They can come across as so unknowing and ”Eve” like.

•Lilith conjunct/square Sun or Ascendant might be that kid in the neighbourhood that parents dont want their children to play with.

•If you are a s*xworker and you meet a client whos Lilith conjuncts your Venus/Moon be ready to make money 🤑💰

SIDENOTE: Sometimes when I post about how men respond to Lilith dominant women I get comments like ”Not everything is about men,women can exist without male validation you know” . Absolutely! not everything is about male validation thats true but men being uncomfortable in your presence WILL affect your life when you are young w no education because in a lot of places men got the power. If a you are someone who intimidates men it WILL affect you because men like that will make damn sure to put you in your place. Lilith is not only about sexiness and confidence but also about the pain of being a woman. The pain of being considered ”the 2nd gender”. Being punished for being sexual, having a bad reputation because you offended the wrong MAN. Remember that the whole thing with Lilith was that she refused to lay under Adam. So yes Lilith got a lot to do with men. Its also easy for us living in the westworld saying stuff like ”Not everything is about men”. We dont need men like that but how about women in less developed countries? Women who are seen as disgusting for being divorced, women who have to marry someone who r*ped them bc nobody else will marry now that they are not a virgin anymore, divorced women who arent allowed to shake hands with ppl because people think it brings bad luck to touch a divorced woman, women who are in jail for leaving a man. Imagine telling those women to stop thinking that everything is about men.😔

#astro notes #astrology #astro observations #astronotes #lilith aspects #lilith #ascendant #asteroids #lilith square ascendant #lilith conjunct sun

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lomltrentarnold · 10 months

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sweetness — jobe bellingham ₊˚ෆ

warnings : insta au/smau, crack/humor, my awful attempt at being funny, a lot of 💀 jokes, everyone has a crush on her <3 faceclaim is marsai martin!

🍓hana’s notes : for my beloved @iissza <3 thank you for the ideas sweet cheeks love you lots <3 pls tell me what yall think since a lot of you are excited for this 😭 || MAIN MASTERLIST

┆ ° ♡ • ➵ ✩ ◛ °

[ Y/N L/N EXCLUSIVE! ]

“So Y/N, since the fashion show is over, what are some of your favourite outfits?”

“Oh! Good Question! My obvious favourites were Zendaya and Beyonce’s!”

“But also I love my boyfriend’s look, he looks very handsome.”

“Who’s your boyfriend?!”

“Someone.”

• • •

footballcelebritynews just posted!

footballcelebritynews Football youngster Jobe Bellingham was seen leaving with upcoming model Y/N L/N after the Louis Vuitton Men’s Spring-Summer 2024 Show. Let us what you think about this couple!

view all comments!

user8 heart been broke so many times 😔

user7 cats out of the bag 🤭 that’s actually me guys

⤷ user6 ur mom would’ve been more believable

user9 thats my hand he should be holding

user12 Once in an interview she said that she’s currently with someone who plays on the pitch!!

⤷ user4 omg!!! they are always liking each other’s posts 🤭

⤷ user3 and she once post that she was at a match he was playing in!

⤷ user2 how do yall know all this shit 💀

• • •

yourinstagram just posted!

yourinstagram lv babyyyy 🧸📸

view all comments!

jobebellingham 😍

isabelamerced So beautiful!!

hallebailey 😍😍😍!!!

user1 QUEEN IS SLAYING

user2 mother is mothering!!!!!!

user9 whats jobe doing here 🤨?

user3 marry me pls 🥹

user4 shes so gorgeous i might cry

user5 is this the girl that was seen with jobe???

user6 how did jobe bag this beauty??

⤷ user8 i honestly have no idea 🤣

user7 jobe must a rizz master

user8 the comments are killing me lmfaoo 💀💀

• • •

jobebellingham just posted!

jobebellingham Happy 1 year my love ❤️

tagged; yourinstagram

view all comments!

judebellingham ❤️❤️

yourinstagram my love 🫶 but why that last picture babe???

⤷ jobebellingham Cause you look too cute 😘

user2 AWW OMGG

user1 GUYS??? WHAT IS THIS???

user3 my heart 🥹🥹

user4 she’s so lucky!!!

⤷ user5 no jobe is lucky!!! she’s so pretty!!

user8 no jobe dont do this 💔

user6 what if this was my last straw

user7 i’m not even mad bro she mad pretty

user9 HERE WE GO!!!!

• • •

yourinstagram just posted!

yourinstagram 1 year with the loml 💌 (pls let me take a proper pic of you later 🥹)

tagged; jobebellingham

view all comments!

jobebellingham Love you ❤️

judebellingham love you guys 🫶 (especially y/n)

⤷ jobebellingham I’m blocking you

⤷ yourinstagram hey!!! don’t be mean to him 😡😡 (we can do it tomorrow)

⤷ jobebellingham I’m blocking both of you

⤷ yourinstagram aw baby come here lemme give u a kiss 😘

judebellingham just so you guys know he immediately lit up and ran to meet her

user1 aww thats so cute let me check if my toaster is waterproff

user2 You guys are adorable 🥰 (laying on the highway)

user3 y/n?? What is this? I thought we had something 😔

user5 you don’t have to lie y/n we all know you’re with me 😘

user7 you guys are goals!! get it? cause he plays football 😀😀😀

⤷ user8 you should erase your whole existence

⤷ user9 That joke deserves an award 😂

⤷ user10 the contrast between the two comments lmfaooo

user11 this is so sweet my teeth started to hurt

#hana writes!#TELL ME WHAT YALL THINK!!!! 🫶🫶#jobe bellingham #jobe bellingham x reader #jobe bellingham blurb #jobe bellingham imagine #jobe bellingham smau #jobe bellingham insta au #jobe bellingham fluff #football x y/n #football x you #football imagine #football x reader

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wyverber · 2 years

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Idk if this is apart of your hc but Toby and Tim Fatherly Bonding?

Interesting. It wasn't now it is.

Fatherly Bonding with Tim and Toby

Tim never had a Father figure (Orphan) but he is the Father friend in the Group.

(Ngl he would throw fists with Toby's dad if he was still alive)

So just imagine Toby being 17 at the time when Slender picked him up, awkward with conversation because he never really went to school and when he did he didn't have friends 😔. He doesn't even have smt to talk about, absolutely no hobbies at the time. Just a lonely Teenage boy. Even tho Slender did everything in his power to reduce the Mentally ill part of his mind he just doesn't know how to talk with people.

That's when Tim comes in. He knows how to interact with people like Toby, he was always the kid in the Orphanage who welcomed every new and scared kid and took care of 'em

The first thing he does his introduce himself to Toby, after Toby just stammered his name out he understood that he can't really just throw him in a Conversation.

(Toby was really social awkward)

So, acts of service is the go to for now, Tim is just making small things really!

Toby gets out of bed to work or to what ever that is he's doing? Tim makes his bed:)

Toby didn't eat in the last 5 hours? He makes him food and brings him a Glass of water every now and then.

Toby just said a quick and almost unnoticed 'thankyou' nothing more nothing less. Well that's not true, when he did something wrong or broke something he apologized like there was no tomorrow. Thinking he would get in trouble and that just broke Tim's heart.

The first time Toby spoke more than that was when Tim brought him some sliced up Apples for a snack BC dinner would take longer than expected.

"I don't like the skin from the apple" Toby said quietly. "Could you repeat that?" Tim said softly, the Boy looked at him like he was scared he angered the much older male, not sure if he should repeat that or not. "You don't like the skin?" Tim asked not sure if he got that right, the boy nicked and said "My Mother always tells me that's the healthiest part of the apple but I hate it" he stopped thinking if he should talk more or to stay quiet. "Okay, I'm right back!" Was heard before the older male grabbed the plate and got into the kitchen quickly peeling the apple slices.

From that day on two things happens the first would be Toby talking more and the second thing would be Tim finding out Toby is a really picky eater.

The first few conversations where just about food or rather food Toby hates or just doesn't like.

Tim loves to cook, he can relax while doing it and bond with Toby... So that's what their doing now. Cooking together. Brian always comments about Toby's (like U would say in German) extra sausage type of personality. Tim doesn't care about what he's eating and if it makes an Traumatised teenager happy to eat food he likes than who would he be to say no? Exactly an Asshole.

After a time Tim is not only Toby's friend and 'therapist' but also like a father, you have to know that Toby isn't a shy person he LOVES Talking, he likes cooking drawing and Beyonce! Tim can't explain how happy he is for Toby that he can be himself and that all thanks to sliced apples XD

Well that was if for now if you want more if Fatherly Bonding or something else please feel free to Request! I don't have Rules yet? So you can use that until I close this spicy Request thingy :*

#creepypasta headcanon #Tim and Toby Headcanon #tim wright #tim wright x reader #ticci toby #creepypasta #toby rogers #Toby Rogers Headcanon #creepypasta Headcanons #creepy pasta #marble hornets headcanons

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destinyc1020 · 3 months

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They didn't miss anything Destiny they just want to stick to a narrative that Zendaya and Timothee cannot be friends. The question is, why some Tomdayas are so insecure about a possible friendship? Z has been in a relationship with Tom now for over 7yrs, and Timmy is and has been with Kylie for over a yr., what is the fuss about? are people that insecure to have Zendaya near another man? what do you think will happen exactly? They both claim to be friends so who are these people to claim they are not? how do you know they are not? Yes Timmy mentioned the apartment situation back in 2020 in the interview, but some of them act as if we didn't see their interaction at the Oscars, all the sightings of Timmy and Z together while filming Dune, they were hiking together, him getting on the same Jet as Z in Paris, him at Darnell's birthday party, they walked in one after the other at Beyonce's concert and we now know Beyonce had a meet and greet for VIP before the show. Timothee could have listed any of these occasions, but it doesn't matter because people will stick to their own version of reality.

Yea, I don't see the big deal on EITHER side honestly. Those who are pushing a bosom buddy scenario lol, and those who are pushing a "just work acquaintances" angle. 🥴

To me, REAL Tomdayas aren't threatened by Zendaya having male friends. Like you said, Z and Tom have been dating for like 7 years. They've known each other for 8 years. Like.... let's get real here.

Plus, Z has had male costar friends for YEARS! Do y'all forget about Kamil?? 🤣😅 Geez lol....

Like you said, they're both in rlshps with other ppl. Idk why some ppl make the Timmy/Zendaya FRIENDSHIP so weird. 😕 That goes for both sides. The weirdos who try to ship them all the time, and the ones who act like they must be enemies. 🙄

As you mentioned, all the stuff you brought up sounds like two ppl who are genuine friends of each other. It's GOOD to have great friends in this industry coz it can be cutthroat, backstabbing, phony, and even lonely at times. 😔

I just don't get the overthinking honestly.

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mybiasisexo · 1 year

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Entangled - Part 6

Pairing: Chanyeol x f.Reader

Chapter Warnings: Language | Alcohol Consumption

Word Count: 6.6k

Author Notes: Firstly, happy belated birthday to the loml 😔 *plays Virgos groove by Beyonce*. Sorry for the delay y'all, its that time of year🚶🏾‍♀️. It feels so good to have yeollie back! Im eager for his solo! But yes, its finally D-Day!!!! Myeon is getting married y'all!!! (in the story not irl....unless 👀) Ive learned that establishing setting is not my forte, hopefully y'all can pick up what im putting down.

As always, feedback is greatly appreciated and I hope you like the chapter 😊💕

“I can’t do this.”

The words brought you to an abrupt stop in the middle of the busy sidewalk. People brushed past you, sucking their teeth in annoyance, but you didn’t notice them. You didn’t notice anything as you stared blankly at the ground.

“What?” A tall figure loomed over you, long bowed legs obscuring the gum covered sidewalk. He let out a chuckle. “We’ve only looked at one apartment. But, if you’re tired, it’s okay. We don’t have to look at any more today. I’ll reschedule.”

“That’s not what I’m talking about.” Your eyes fell shut as your head began to pound. You started rubbing your temples to try to relieve the sudden pain. It gave little relief. A whimper left your mouth, the small noise caught the man before you’s attention. He took a step closer, the small action had you feeling claustrophobic, like walls were closing in on you, despite being out in the open. Your throat and eyes were burning, chest constricting painfully. These reactions weren’t new. No. You had been feeling like this for weeks. The best way you could describe it was as though you were being pulled deep into the sea. Being dragged along against your will. The current was too strong for you to swim out of, and you were choking, drowning, panicking….

It felt like you were dying.

Inhaling deeply, you worked up the courage to look up at your fiance. He met your gaze, caught the tears shining in your eyes, and furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. That confusion quickly turned into concern once he registered your distress.

“Chanyeol, I….” Your voice gave out, cutting your confession short. Instead, you shake your head, hoping that was enough to convey your conflicting emotions.

“Baby?” His hand wrapped around yours, the one with the band that represented your forever.

The happiest you’ve ever seen Park Chanyeol was the moment he slid that engagement ring onto your finger. The way he couldn’t help but smile whenever he caught sight of you wearing it never went unnoticed. “What’s wrong?”

You were pretty sure you were having a panic attack. The pain in your chest only grew, made it so hard to catch your breath you began to gasp. The effort collected onto the corner of your eyes, spilling over onto your cheeks in hot streaks.

It was too late now.

Or maybe it wasn’t. Chanyeol’s eyes bounced back and forth between your own as he nervously rubbed his lips together, stretching them into a line so thin, you no longer could see the pink flesh.

“I don’t think we should do this,” you managed to gasp out. There it was, now out in the air. You took him in, wearily awaiting his response to your words.

“Oh….” He visibly deflated, and for a second you thought he understood what you were saying. But, he perked up immediately. His optimism made you sigh in dismay. “You can just move in with me! We don’t have to get a new apartment. I just assumed–”

“Chanyeol!” You yelled, shutting him up. Your once flaccid fingers gripped his tightly. He winced, but didn’t attempt to pull away. If anything it allowed him to focus more on you.

“Please,” you begged hoarsely. “I…I don’t want to marry you!”

The silence that followed was suffocating. The whole world froze for an immeasurable time, you swore even those around you stopped moving as well.

He just….gawked at you. As though he heard your words, but couldn’t fully make out what they meant. You could see the wheels turning in his head, replaying what you said over and over until they gained meaning. It took some time, but soon his eyes began to flutter and his chest expanded, inhaling a ragged breath. While he breathed in, you exhaled.

You were worried you had broken him there.

“You don’t…? Marry…? I….”

With wide eyes, you silently encouraged him, in the hope that he put two and two together.

“I don’t understand.”

“What is there to not understand?” You asked, frustration sharpening your words. “I don’t want to marry you anymore, Chanyeol.”

“But–but why?”

His heart was starting to break, the situation fully dawning on him. It’s a devastating sight, watching him realize he’s about to lose the love of his life. You wanted to look away, to avoid the pain that would come from the weight of his anguish. Seeing his suffering was just as wounding as if he were the one to break up with you instead. But, you had to push more, had to shove the knife a few inches further so that you could kill this completely.

“I’m not ready. I thought I was, I really did, but I need to be alone–”

“Alone?” He spat out the word, as though that weren’t a part of his vocabulary, which you imagined it weren’t. “But you love me? Why do you want to leave?”

Your lips shook so much it grew difficult to speak. “That’s not enough. I wish it was, but it isn’t. You have to let me go.”

“You want me to let you go?” He asked in disbelief. “We’ve been together for four years! We’re planning on getting married in a few months! You’re all I know! Please, baby, tell me you aren’t serious.”

You remained silent and it only pushed him further into a panic. “We don’t have to get married now, if that’s what you want. We don’t have to move in together. We can wait. I can wait. We can slow down, focus on other things until you’re ready. Just please, please, Mel! Don’t do this. Don’t leave me.”

“I’ve already made up my mind,” you said. Chanyeol shook his head in denial, protests left his lips, but you continued, raising your voice so it overlapped his. “I don’t want to do this anymore. I don’t want to be with you anymore, Chanyeol! Don’t make this harder than it needs to be.”

“Don’t say that!” He cried, tears streaming down his face. Your hands balled into fists, fingernails dug deep into your palms, drawing blood.

Chanyeol fell to his knees, gasping for breath before you, and begged for you to stop. To think about this, to love him back. Love him. Don’t you love him?

He reached for you and you took several steps back and that rejection seemed to snap something inside him.

He immediately stopped crying, face falling in shock. His hands were still stretched towards you, hands open for your embrace. The only sound coming from you both were his ragged breaths.

He stared at his empty hands as though seeing them for the first time, confusion washed over his features. Did you just…deny him? He then took in his surroundings, took notice to the small crowd forming around you, who took in the show with either pity or curiosity. It grounded him, made him aware of the scene he was making. Slowly his arms lowered back to his sides, and he silently got back to his feet, brushing his pants off and sniffing, wiping away the wetness on his red face.

“Let me take you home.” His voice was gravelly and deeper than you had ever heard it. You hated the way it caused your heart to speed up, your lower abdomen to burn with want. That was the opposite of what you should’ve felt.

“Yeol, I don’t think–”

He doesn’t give you time to finish. Quickly, spinning around and heading towards his car without making sure you were even following. You had to jog to catch up with his wide steps. You remained silent. You understood. No one deserved to get dumped in public like this.

Once you were both in his car, he drove off without a word or glance over to you. Even the music remained off, which was never a good sign of his state of mind.

It was only a fifteen minute drive to your place, but it felt much longer.

He parked in front of your complex, turned off his car, and you both just… sat there. You played with your fingers, and tried to ignore the way the streetlight ahead hit your engagement ring, causing the light to bounce around the car. It was beautiful–a great representation of Chanyeol’s feelings for you.

“I’m sorry,” you finally spoke, feeling wetness on your hands. “I hate hurting you.”

His hands curled tightly around the steering wheel. “So, you want to go through with this? You really want to call off the wedding?”

You nodded, albeit reluctantly. “We’re not ready–at least, I’m not. I don’t want to grow to resent you, Yeol. And if we get married now, I will. I know I will. I’m starting to think that I’m not the type to get married, to be tied down. I… want to swim.”

He narrowed his eyes at you, and your heart leapt. It should have made you feel cold, instead it warmed your heart.

You couldn’t help but reach over and cup his cheek and smile ruefully at him. “You’re going to make a wonderful husband, Yeol. Just not mine.”

“Don’t say that.” He ordered again, voice cracking. He reached up and grabbed your hand, holding it firmly against his dampening cheek. For the second time, he broke down. Weeping the loss of his soon-to-be bride. You held him. Let him lean into your touch for the last time, to savor the feeling of his soft skin beneath your fingers. This truly felt like a farewell. Like you were never going to see him again, and if that were the case you wanted to remember all the things you loved most about him while he was still in front of you, even as he fell apart around you.

You sobbed with him. Mourned for the future you both had planned for, the only future you saw for the last few years. He had grown to be all you knew, and it wasn’t as easy as you were making it to leave him.

“I love you,” he cried. “I love you so damn much. I don’t want to lose you.”

That only made you sob harder. Fuck, you loved him too, and you wished you could tell him that. But that would only make it harder for him to let you go, and you needed him to. You both had to move on.

“I’m sorry,” was all you could muster. You repeated that word over and over, hoping he would grasp the weight of your regret.

The sun was in the middle of its descent when you both were able to finally catch your bearings.

Chanyeol let go of your hand, took in the ring and closed his eyes, readjusting in his seat so that he could lean back and stare unseeingly at the darkening sky through his sunroof.

“Now what?” He asked.

“We move on,” you said between hiccups. “I’ll inform everyone in a week. Give you time… to come to terms with everything.”

“I can’t believe you’re actually doing this,” he muttered, still looking at the scramble of stars ahead of him. “I thought you loved me.”

You took a massive breath and let it out in a gust, clearing your throat of the burning ball building within it.

You needed to go before you said something stupid, like you changed your mind. There was just one thing left to do.

You started taking off your ring.

Hands brought you to a stop.

“What are you doing?” It was said so fiercely, you jerked back, startled. When you locked eyes with Chanyeol’s, they were aflame. The fire in his eyes reminded you of the infamous painting of Lucifer.

The intensity had you gulping in fear.

“Keep it,” he said through gritted teeth.

“But–”

“No,” he repeated, just as intensely. “That’s yours. Hold on to my heart for me. I only want you to have it.”

“Chanyeol….” Your eyes clouded over again with fresh tears. There was a change in him. Instead of being the victim, he was being strong, fully coming to terms with what was happening.

His grip on your hand tightened slightly, “You said you want to be alone. Fine. I’ll leave you alone. But, I want you to remember that there is someone that loves you. I will always be in love with you. Even now, when you’re leaving me. Even if you find someone new, I will always be here–waiting for you to come back to me.”

“What if I don’t come back?” You can’t help but ask.

“I don’t know if you will,” he said. His authenticity only made you feel worse. “But I’ll be waiting all the same.”

He squeezed your hand. “So, please, Mel, do this last thing for me. Keep the ring.”

Hot tears streamed down your face and he brushed them away with his thumbs before leaving a lingering kiss on your forehead.

“I love you.”

His confession had you sobbing. He was letting you go completely, and it had you regretting the decision. You loved him so much and you leaving at the end of the day had nothing to do with him. This was a selfish choice, but it was one you knew you had to make. You had to do something for yourself for once, and this was it. Putting yourself first wasn't easy, but it was necessary for you to grow into the person you wanted to be.

“I know you still love me,” Chanyeol continued. “But I think I’m starting to understand what you’re trying to do.”

“I’m sorry,” you said for the hundredth time.

He gave you a small smile, taking in your features as though it were for the last time, which was a high chance it would be. “I know.”

That’s enough of a goodbye to you.

You stare at each other for a moment longer, wanting to prolong the inevitable. But, finally you pulled away and opened the door, stumbling out. Holding your hand to your chest, you felt the cool metal of your engagement ring against your burning flesh–the physical representation of his heart.

Despite breaking it, it was the only thing that gave you strength.

It was what got you through the loneliest year of your life.

Until he took it back.

You awake the next day more exhausted than before you dozed off. Cracking open an eye, you see Sehun fluttering around. His dark hair is wet, dampening the shoulders of his white t-shirt that’s tucked into black slacks.

He notices you and grins. “Oh! Good morning.”

You groan as you stretch. “What time is it?”

“It’s a little past eleven. I was just about to wake you. I have to leave here in a bit.”

You sit up, squinting. “I need a shower.”

“You’re free to use mine, although you didn’t bring anything with you.”

You sigh. That means you’ll have to go back to your room.

“There’s breakfast on the table. Eat first. You’ll have just enough time to get ready after.”

You nod while letting out a large yawn. Sehun walks past you and you grab his wrist, pulling him to a stop. He glances down at you questioningly, and you answer with a smile. “Thank you.”

He matches your smile. “Of course. Now go eat.”

He pats the bird’s nest on top of your head before disappearing into his room, leaving while you’re in the middle of eating. You take your time, chewing slowly as you work up the courage to head over to your suite.

Once in the hallway, your eyes are drawn over to the door a little off to your right. The one Chanyeol vanished after kissing you last night. Your breath catches as you remember the feeling of his lips against yours. The way his hands cupped your face. The desperation in his gaze and voice. You shake your head and realize that you had started walking over to the room instead of your own. You let out a shaky laugh, you can’t go to him. Not yet. Not after last night, not before going to a wedding of all things! Still… you find yourself lingering. Hoping, maybe, he’ll open the door. That he’ll find you waiting for him, that you both can finally have the talk you’ve been dancing around since first locking eyes a few days ago.

He doesn’t come out, probably already left for the wedding, and with disappointment sitting heavy in your chest, you shuffle back over to your suite.

It’s quiet when you finally enter. The door to Seulgi’s room is closed, but yours is open. You creep in to find your best friend sitting at the vanity, blow-drying her hair. You lock eyes in the mirror and she jumps from fright.

“Morning,” you wince. “I just have to grab my things to get ready.”

“Are you going to get ready at Sehun’s?”

“Yeah. Thought it would be easier on everyone.”

Seulgi pouts. “We were going to get ready together.”

“That was before Yerim decided to hate us.”

“Actually, she might’ve already gotten over it.” She sees your confused expression and sighs. “Chanyeol stopped by earlier.”

Her words cause you to completely freeze. You don’t even breathe as you register what she just said. You had missed him.

“He did?” You ask, anticipating her answer. That bitter iron taste slowly leaking into the back of your throat.

“Yeah. He came by to talk to Yerim. I guess one of the boys told him what he did last night. He sounded very apologetic. They spoke for a while, but I didn’t hear anything. They went in my room and closed the door. He asked for you as well, but I told him that you weren’t here, and that talking to you probably wasn’t the best idea.”

You hum noncommittally, thawing again. Seulgi is right. Neither one of you are in the best place mentally at the moment. And despite wanting to speak to him privately, you are a bit apprehensive of being alone with him.

“Yerim spoke to me afterwards,” Seulgi continues, unaware of your inner monologue. “It was to ask if I booked her flight, but still. She didn’t sound as angry, so whatever he said must have calmed her down.”

“So, she’s still going to leave?”

She lets out a heavy sigh. “Unfortunately, she won’t budge. She will be flying out right after the ceremony.”

“This is all my fault.”

She lifts a hand, halting your words. “Don’t start. You know that it’s not. Now get over here and dry the rest of my hair, I can’t reach the back.”

You can’t help but smile at her bossy tone and walk over, grabbing the dryer out her hands and gladly complying.

When that task is done, you slip into the shower. Once clean, you head back to your room to get dressed, but when you open the door, Yerim is on the other side.

“Oh!” You startle.

“Oh, you’re here….” She averts her gaze, and it kills you a little.

You call after her. “I know you’re still angry, but can we talk? Just us?”

She sighs but relents with a nod, heading back to the room she shared with Seulgi until last night.

She sits on the edge of the bed, you remain standing.

“I’m sorry,” you start. “I’m sorry for not telling you the moment I realized he was your date. I should’ve said something then, but when he pretended to not know us, I don’t know, I didn’t want you to think I was making things up or trying to meddle.”

“It’s true that I most likely wouldn’t have believed you at first,” she says. “But I still believe I was owed that much. I could’ve talked to him about it and we would’ve figured things out together, instead of him making the decision himself.”

“You’re right,” you agree. “You should’ve had a choice. By not telling you, I took that away from you. I just couldn’t bear to break your heart, Yerim. When you came down to the hall that first day, it was obvious how happy you were. I didn’t want to take that away from you. I would rather swallow my pride and jealousy, and endure the pain of seeing him with somebody else, then ruin your joy.”

Yerim’s quiet, pondering over your words. Her next words surprise you. “You were jealous?”

You huff out a laugh. “Is that all you heard?”

She shakes her head, but you catch a small smile. “It’s just weird. You being jealous of me.”

“This whole situation has been weird,” you say.

“That I can agree with.”

It’s silent for a breath and she seems to sober up. “I believe you.”

That’s enough to have your head whipping over to her.

“I believe that you had my best interest at heart, but at the end of the day, he still kissed you and you still lied to me. I can’t forgive you–not now at least. Not when it’s all still so fresh.”

“I understand.” And you did, although it hurt to hear. “I wish things went differently. You deserved better.”

“Thank you,” she says with a watery smile. “You did too, you know?”

You eye her skeptically and she notices, rolling her own. She says your name. “You’ve been caught in the middle this whole time. I don’t know what has been going on between you and Chanyeol, but I know from that kiss, that you both had been holding back for my sake. It wasn’t fair for you to have to do that.”

You think about the other almost kisses and can’t help but to disagree with Yerim’s words. Yes, you were holding back, but it was only a matter of time before you had cracked yourself.

“Chanyeol was never mine.” Yerim’s words catch your attention and you refocus on the broken-hearted girl, who was looking very introspective and mature at the moment. “I know this now. He was here earlier. He apologized for last night and the way he handled us, and it was so obvious, I can’t believe I hadn’t seen it the moment you were back in his life. He never really liked me. Maybe he thought he could, but it seems more like he saw a way to try to forget you and took it. I just so happened to be a willing participant in his charade.”

“He wasn’t using you,” you can’t help but defend.

Her smile turns sad. “He still cares about you, and I have a feeling you still care about him also.”

“Yerim….”

“You don’t have to explain anything to me. Just be honest from now on. Okay, Mel?”

You groan and she laughs, it rings sincerely.

“What does that even mean, anyway?”

“Long story,” you dismiss with a wave of a hand. “So… we’re good?”

She contemplates for a moment, scrutinizing you before giving you a nod. “We’re about twenty percent good.”

“I’ll take it!” You pull her into a hug before she can fight you off and leave her room in higher spirits.

You get ready with Seulgi and the two of you are back to feeling excited. With the ceremony looming, it’s easy to get lost in your excitement for Junmyeon. Thoughts of Chanyeol are forgotten as you laugh and dance to the playlist Seulgi created specifically for getting hype over the event.

The massive hotel Junmyeon will one day inherit has two wedding venues. One is outside by the shore, while the other is in a building connected to the hotel. He decided to have his ceremony in the latter, which you are grateful for. The sun is beating heavily this late afternoon, and you know your makeup would melt off if you were outside for too long.

The hall is magnificent. In the center is a long elevated runway, the end of it splits into two, so it’s like a T shaped stage. The surface of the stage is a screen, showing a moving image of the sparkling blue sea, it’s waves gently overlapping each other. At the edge of the stage, in the middle of the horizontal top of the T is a white arch with peach flowers wrapped around it with golden vines. At least six chandeliers hang low from the ceiling with icy diamonds softly sparkling against the golden hues of the light. Either side of the runway is lined with rows of chairs all facing the front where the bride and groom will be saying their vows.

Yerim, Seulgi, and yourself sit on the right side of the stage, in the fourth row. The place is filling up quickly, the event close to starting. The three of you sit silently as you wait with baited breath. Why are you nervous? You don’t even know, but your foot keeps tapping restlessly and you can’t stop wringing your hands.

Finally, the lighting dims and the orchestra from the dinner when you first arrived starts playing. Everyone turns to the double doors that open at the foot of the walkway and the officiate walks in before taking her place in front of the arch. Then comes two pairs of grandparents, followed by both Nayeon and Junmyeon’s mothers, both dawning beautiful hanboks in peach and champagne respectfully.

Once they are seated, the music changes and Junmyeon comes waltzing in, a hand in his pocket and a brilliant thousand watt smile on his lips. You can’t help but smile as well, basking in his joy. He acknowledges people in the audience while you all clap at his arrival. When he’s beside your row, you catch his eye and you both share a wink as both Seulgi and you throw him a thumbs up. He pats his chest in gratitude before moving on to the other guests. Seulgi turns to face you and you both lean into each other. Your friend is actually doing it. He’s actually getting married.

Once Junmyeon takes his place in the front, the wedding party enters. You wrap your arms around Seulgi’s waist, resting your chin on her shoulder as you watch the rest of your best friends walk down the aisle. They all look incredibly handsome. All in charcoal two piece suits, white button downs, silky champagne ties, and hair all gelled back, exposing their foreheads. They’re all just as joyous as the rest of you, big smiles on all of their faces. Chanyeol is the last one to enter, probably because he’s the tallest, and you purposely avoid looking at him, knowing you won’t be able to handle him like this. You wouldn’t be able to handle him like this on your strongest day, but after the kiss, it’s just not realistic.

The music changes again, lilting to the familiar tune of Here Comes the Bride, and everyone stands and shifts their attention to the open doors in anticipation for the star of the ceremony.

Nayeon glides into the room, her father at her side, and she looks absolutely stunning. She’s wearing a lacy long sleeved gown that floats down into a big train. appearing like fresh fallen snow. Her hair is braided back into a knot, revealing her beautiful face. Her big eyes are shiny with unshed tears, and despite not being that close to her, you can’t help but grow misty eyed. She’s undeniably gorgeous, embodying everything a bride should. You can’t take your eyes off of her.

She makes it to the front, her father passes her hand over to her husband’s and goes back to his seat, leaving the two to smile up at each other, and you’re sure they’ve forgotten there are others in the room.

Your attention gets pulled to the right, where Junmyeon’s groomsmen stand, and you lock eyes with Chanyeol. It’s the first time seeing him after his drunken confession and it knocks the wind out of you. He is the most handsome man you have ever seen, but his beauty is haunting with his perfect features fallen in despair. It’s as though seeing you in this setting reminds him of what he lost, of what could have been. Three years ago, he would be in Junmyeon’s position, staring lovingly at his bride-to-be. Instead, he watches her in the crowd, with longing in his wounded heart.

It’s enough to bring back that bitter iron taste this wedding has shoved down your throat.

“I know,” you mouth to him, and god didn’t you. You give him an understanding nod and that seems to be enough to console him. He sucks in a breath, finally blinking away the strong emotions of regret and helplessness, and turns back to his friends.

Now that the couple are at the altar, everyone sits down, allowing the event to proceed.

The ceremony is quick. The two share their vows. Nayeon’s is sweet and she barely gets through them, nearly bursting into tears every few words. Junmyeon’s is cheesy, riddled with dad jokes, but there is no denying his devotion to her. Baekhyun and Chen, who both minored in choir, sing a few songs for the newlyweds that only make you even more emotional. After that, the couple turn to the crowd, bowing before you all. Nayeon lowers her head, but Junmyeon gives a deep bow, falling onto his hands and knees to press his forehead to the stage. Then they walk to the tail end of the stage and finally share their first kiss as husband and wife. Junmyeon, ever the showman, dips Nayeon and the crowd hoots and cheers for them. It’s all very sweet.

That marks the end of the actual ceremony, so they head back to the arch and take pictures with guests for about twenty minutes. Everyone wants a picture with the newlyweds. Yerim doesn’t wish to, but both Seulgi and you are practically forced to by the boys. You both get on the stage and catch the way Nayeon takes in your matching champagne colored dresses with dismay before quickly brushing it off.

Just because you weren’t in the wedding didn’t mean you weren’t going to show your support. You are also close friends with Junmyeon, so he may have let it slip what color the boys will be wearing, hinting that you both should maybe get dresses in that color as well.

You shimmy up to Sehun, who holds you close, and smile at the camera. The whole college crew gets a bunch of pictures together and it is filled with laughter and silliness, as it always is when you’re all together.

Once you’re done with the photo op, you head back over to the ballroom, where the reception is being held. Seulgi and Yerim break away to go to the hotel room so that Yerim can leave, her flight is in a couple hours. Seulgi tells you she’ll be right back. You want to go with them, but don’t want to agitate Yerim any more than you already have, so you instead enter the room alone. None of your friends have arrived yet, so you just awkwardly stand by the food, not really hungry. You take in everyone present and get overwhelmed with loneliness. It’s not too long though, before the groomsmen all enter. You chuckle when the crowd applauses at their arrival, the mini celebrities.

Jongdae finds you quickly and makes his way over.

“What are you doing, hiding in the corner?” He asks. You attempt a smile, having little faith in the strength of your voice, and shake your head in answer.

“Are you hungry?” He asks. You shake your head again. He furrows a brow. “Where’s Seulgi and her sister?”

You shrug and clear your throat, trying to tell him in so many ways what’s going on. He takes a pause, eyes roaming your face and posture. You aren’t sure if he catches on, but he must have seen something because he nudges your shoulder and gently grabs your wrist, pulling you over to a table already inhabited by Jongin and Baekhyun.

It’s not long until the newlyweds make their grand entrance, and soon after a DJ starts playing fun music and the ballroom lights dim, allowing for a little laser show to bounce shapes across the walls. The tables are situated in such a way that allow for a makeshift dance floor in front of the DJ table. Sehun arrives with a whole tray of champagne and hands them out. Seulgi makes it back just in time to join the toast.

“To us,” Sehun murmurs simply. You all gently clink your glasses together, basking in the love you all have for each other.

“Is she gone?” You finally find your voice to ask Seulgi after taking a sip of the obviously expensive drink.

She nods, exposed shoulders falling. “She didn’t want me to wait for her. She said she’ll text me when she makes it there.”

You rub her back and she leans her head onto your shoulder. You take in your dapper friends. “You all did so amazing, and look very handsome in your suits.”

“The best groomsmen ever,” Seulgi adds, throwing them a finger heart.

“Why, thank you,” Baekhyun says, smoothing his suit jacket.

“We’ll keep the suits for the next wedding,” Jongin adds.

“Which will probably be Jongdae at this rate,” Sehun says.

Jongdae laughs. “Hey now, let’s have this baby first. Then we can start talking about marriage.”

“Should we bet on it?” Baekhyun asks, smiling conspiringly.

Jongin groans. “You never play fair.”

“You’re no fun. The only one that ever plays with me anymore is Chanyeol.”

“Where is he anyways?” Seulgi asks, lifting her head off of you so that she can continue drinking.

“Around here somewhere,” Baekhyun says, tossing a hand dismissively. You surreptitiously glance around, but don’t see him. You try not to show your disappointment.

“He was helping the crew put away chairs before I left the venue,” Sehun reveals.

“That’s nice of him,” Jongdae says.

“Always such a sweetheart.”

“I thought he was an asshole?”

“He’s a sagittarius,” Seulgi shrugs. That’s enough of an answer for you all. You get the suspicion that he’s being ‘nice’ as an avoidance tactic and you’re jealous you didn’t think of it yourself.

Another twenty minutes pass, and even though you love being around your friends, you just want to be alone and sulk. Now that the wedding is officially over, you can’t shake off that dark rotten feeling sitting heavy in your gut. There are so many negative emotions swirling around you, darkening your aura, and there’s only one other person that you feel you can talk to about it, but aren’t even sure if he wants to.

The others have been drinking and some have worked up the courage to get on the dance floor. The groomsmen really know how to put on a show. The crowd instantly cheers, glad to see that people are starting to let loose. You’re thankful to see Seulgi join them, she’s honestly one of the best dancers in the group, and she needs to let loose right now.

The only person that sits at the table with you is Sehun.

“I think I’m going to go,” you tell him, trying to act regretful.

He takes you in quietly. “I’m glad you stayed for this long. I didn’t think you would come to the reception.”

You raise a questioning eyebrow at him, but he gives you a smile full of pity as an answer.

“You look beautiful, by the way. It was smart of Junmyeon to tell you the color. I did notice that Yerim didn’t wear it though.”

“She’s not one of us….” You let the sentence trail off, catching how defensive you sound.

“You’re right,” he acknowledges around the rim of his flute. “She’s not.”

You study him for a moment, taking in the way he turns away from you to watch your friends dance battle. You want to leave, but find yourself hesitating, waiting for Sehun to say what he wants to say.

“What are you waiting for?” He asks instead, turning back to you. “Go before they notice. If any of them catch you, you won’t be leaving this reception until we all get kicked out.”

You grin gratefully before quietly slipping out. You feel bad for not saying goodbye to Junmyeon, but you’ll see him again some day. Plus, you know he won’t hold it against you.

The lobby is empty when you go to hit the up button on the elevator and rub your cold bare arms as you wait for the doors to open. Once they do, you climb in, hit the floor number, lean against the corner and wait for the doors to close, trying to keep your mind clear of any thoughts.

Right as the doors are closing, someone sticks their hand out, causing them to open again. Your heart both plummets and soars as Chanyeol rushes in. He locks eyes with you and freezes in shock, not expecting you of all people. He catches himself quickly, throwing you a wistful knowing grin. “Couldn’t stomach it either, huh?”

Just like when Jongdae found you at the reception, you can’t find your voice, only an itchy feeling you can’t scratch. His presence brings on an onslaught of emotions that get caught in your throat, choking you with the overwhelming feeling of longing and hurt and regret and frustration and other things you can’t instantly place.

He swallows thickly at what he sees in your expression, and turns away from you, going to press the button to his floor, only to be reminded you’re both heading to the same place.

The doors close, trapping you in with the one person that’s been on your mind constantly since you stepped foot onto this island. The elevator is thick with tension, the silence almost overbearing, causing you to sweat a little. It’s full of all the things you both want to say to each other, full of things you’ve never been able to say to each other. You want to start rambling, to fill the silence that is only awkward because you’re making it that way. Your chest is heavy with all that you need to tell him piled onto it, but you find that you can’t seem to find the right words, despite everything. You dare a peek and a squeak leaves your mouth when you catch him already looking at you. He seems to be just appraising you, taking advantage of having you this close to him after such a long time. The moment your eyes lock, he straightens to attention, letting you know that he’s willing to listen to whatever you want to say.

How he knows that’s what you want is beyond you, but you’re relieved to know he’s allowing you this.

Unfortunately, you still can’t seem to vocalize the millions of thoughts running through your head.

There’s a ding and then the doors are opening, letting all the tension out with it like a deflating balloon. You make your way out. Chanyeol trails a few steps behind you. The heat of his gaze stiffening your shoulders as you make it to your room.

Once you arrive at your room, you find yourself hovering, unable to pull out the key to unlock the door. Chanyeol walks past you, towards his own room, and you swallow down the disappointment flooding your mouth.

You finally reach into your bag to grab that key, but the sound of urgent footsteps catches your attention. Chanyeol rushes back to you.

“Do you, uh, want to come to my room?” He asks, avoiding your gaze. Your heart leaps as you watch him scratch the back of his neck.

The word is leaving your mouth before you can even contemplate.

“Yeah.”

series m.list | main m.list

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taglist @byunparklimchoi, @defloey

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not-so-rosyyy · 1 year

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Well, the thing is that people adhere to a theory and ignore any evidence that may contradict their theory. They think that just because Z is taller than Tom, she is the "man" of the relationship, a very old-fashioned term. So they heavily comment on pics of her having her arm around him, but not those of him having his arm around her, or caressing her, or grabbing her from behind. It's just a stereotype of taller women being "more masculine". We even have now "trans detectives" claiming that all tall women in the industry are trans. So yeah, I'm not just giving a pass to people spouting this bs. I'm not claiming that Z is a full submissive like some tumblr tomdayas like to claim, but I dislike the complete erasure of all evidence showing Tom taking the initiative and becoming highly protective of Z

sorry for responding to this late, my friend. anyway, what you're describing here is also part of the larger perceived gender role discourse and I agree it is icky. but let's not get sidetracked. this topic started because of the "babygirl" comments on that tweet. and I feel that you are grossly misconstruing what babygirlism actually is 😔

for you to be convinced that it's not the most problematic label for Tom to be called, you first need to understand the nuances of current internet slang, specifically stan talk.

you see, "babygirl" today is used for both male and female personalities and/or fictional characters. when people call someone a babygirl, it means they find that person cute/adorable/attractive and they feel great affection and protectiveness for them. Beyonce has been called a babygirl. Pedro Pascal is a babygirl. Wanda Maximoff is a babygirl. Kendall Roy from Succession and Roy Kent from Ted Lasso are both babygirls. kpop idols no matter the gender are all babygirls. literally anyone can be a babygirl.

it is a term of endearment for someone you'd go feral for, it's not that deep at all 😭

#once again for the people at the back #babygirlism is a state of being #that is all thank you

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cryscendo · 10 days

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D for the song ask game!!!! :3 and B if you wanna do more

i’ll do both letters why not!!

1. Don’t Hurt Yourself - Beyoncé

it’s beyonce. this goes without saying

2. Down Under - Ninja Sex Party

the way this was my top song on spotify wrapped a few years ago is still baffling to me

3. Don’t You Know Who I Think I Am? - Fall Out Boy

one of the best songs on the album?? yes it is possible

4. Disloyal Order of Water Buffaloes - Fall Out Boy

when they opened with in their mania tour my soul left my body

5. Don’t Know How - Ricky Montgomery

love him <3 can’t say much more than that

1. Birdhouse in Your Soul - They Might Be Giants

i love tmbg ❤️ weird music for weird people

2. Bulls in Brooklyn - The Academy Is…

i often fear tai is criminally underrated. santi is their best album btw

3. Bottom - McCafferty

problematic? yes. but what can i say i love toxic bisexual men

4. Bob Dylan - Fall Out Boy

the guitar riff in this song scratches my brain

5. Barely Breathing - Glee Cast Version

AND I’LL SAY IT AGAIN!!!! i quite literally dont know who im kidding 😔 imagining u care 😔😔😔

send me more letters!!!

#ask game #boltgunkiller

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leonaluv · 1 month

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Vishakha woman thread : Vishakha a Sanskrit word meaning divided and branch. 'The branched one " making one energetic, gifted, and strong will to succeed.

vishakha rising for a woman indicates a woman's focus on her career and the goals she wants to achieve. Lee da Hee plays an ambitious character wanting to prove she has to want what it takes to lead her family business. She is wearing the color pink a symbol of Venus. In libra

Sorry for the buffering in the video 😅 and Lee da hee is only viewed by her look.I think this might be why people might see the more negative sign or destructive nature of venus being taken as an object of beauty.

Georgia O'Keeffe (Asc, Jup, Sun, &Moon) in libra a famous painter known for her floral art. She was the first woman to have an exhibit at a museum. The record holder of having the most expensive painting paid for women. (44.4 million).

Sun in a libra ♎ woman is outgoing and tend to be somewhat competitive with other woman. Often referred to as traditional beauty and love being creative. Sun in libra is debilitated resulting in issues with the father. Self-esteem issues.

Elsa Hosk -former Victoria secret model and work for other top brands. She also was a professional basketball player but gave it up for modeling. ☀

Lilly Adrige - a former model now a YouTuber and she mentioned how she was asked a couple of times to fix her tooth gap. She also models for Victoria secret model and is in her mercury Dasha now hosting awards shows.

Moon in libra vishakha -The nature of the moon in libra in vish the ladies tend to be shyer. Cheerful and laughs a lot like how Claire Nakti mentioned in her vish. video. Same as the ladies taking on a persona that often would be a "dark" deity archetype.

Beyonce- was shy growing up and Solange mention in another interview how she had no friends growing up.

Janet Jackson mentions how she felt shy being offstage and how she is only being offered dark roles in films. Later in the interview, she says she rather do something cheerful.

Normani in this interview highlights how singers or performers, in general, will channel in different energy to perform.

Momo-Kpop Idol considers one of the best dancers in kpop. She doesn't feel that confident in singing and I noticed the ladies will often joke about themselves. On hit the stage she dance to Beyonce (vish. Moon ) song crazy in love.

trigger warning-Symbolizing a toxic relationship the black blanket showing how her lover passes away (sucid😔) into red(blood) the dancers showing the dual nature(hate &love) covering her face in black paint like a mask everyone not acknowledging the famous case suwon Toso.

She dance with Mina Sun in Pisces ( ubh) and Virgo ( Hasta) Who played the role of the victim

Wheein is also Vishakha moon also a great dance

#chaewon #le sserafim #kpop tarot #astrology #kpop astrology #beyonce

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anyathefandom · 1 year

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*Plays Spring by Antonio Vivaldi*

So here's an unhinged summary of what happened today:

Michael, josslyn, and Dex remain as unserious people.

Josslyn should shut the fuck up about Kristina because she doesn't understand that Kristina is down to snatch tongues out of mouths🤷

Josslyn continues to express her concern over Trina the only way she knows how and that's by having sex. Trina is visibly not okay and clearly upset at the cabin and josslyn feels concerned so she exercises this emotion by having sex with cam. Trina is in danger on that haunted start and once again josslyn is concerned and she deals with that emotion by having sex with Dex.

Also josslyn remains a little weirdo who needs to talk about her former stepdad with her... boyfriend? Boy toy? in order to feel whole after having sex.

Sidenote: Honestly let's just call thinking about your stepdad while having sex with your boyfriend "just Joss things" at this point.🥴

Willow passing out because she probably realized she should've never cheated on chase with Michael made me laugh.

Sidenote: Like I would honestly applaud the writers if they rolled willow into her casket because of Michael but alas it won't happen 😔

Spencer has once again shown us how talented he is at annoying people😂 I honestly believe diva by Beyonce is definitely in Spencer's playlist rotation.🤷 I know he sits and listens to going "Oh yeah she made this for me😌"

Trina tapped into her track star past and went zoooooooooom

Sidenote: Spencer will definitely be saying "My girl! My girl! My girl!" When he gets back home because he wants everyone to know that he's dating a literal legend!

Curtis has impressed me by being competent and now I'm in crisis. Like Curtis Ashford how dare you not be the default loser that you usually are.😒

Marshall reactions to Trina's adventure shenanigans happened off screen and I think that's a crime.

There was a close up on the gun that one of the goons dropped and now people are hoping Trina gets to go "pew!pew!" Like if we can't have the Tommy gun then I'll settle for this.🤷

I'm sure other things have happened today but that's all I remember so that's a wrap.🤪

#this whole post is just vibes😂#and crackhead energy🙈#general hospital

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14carrotghoul · 10 months

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Tag ten people you want to get to know better

Thank you for tagging me @cha-melodius !

Relationship Status: Single and considering giving hinge another try 😔

Song stuck in my head: HEATED by Beyonce, specifically the line "only a real man can tame me, only the radio can play me"

Last song I listened to: Huelo a Soledad by Ana Gabriel <3 mexican power ballads hit different driving alone at night :')

Three favourite foods: Mac n cheese, eggs benedict, and kettle cooked potato chips w Huichol hot sauce and drowned in lime

Last thing I Googled: So I went to a trivia thing last night and there was a lot of checking the answers after the fact to the sports questions (my favorite being "mlb team cheating banging trash cans"). Before that, I googled "bad british guy from pirates of the carribean" because I forgot the character's name and ended up learning the actor is also Mr. Collins and the "gay that's trying to kill me" from White Lotus lol

Dream trip: Not specific to any particular country but seeing the northern lights is on my bucket list soooo iceland maybe?

Anything I want right now: No back/shoulder pain ever again PLEASE

If you could be any animal, what would you be and why? A capybara chilling along a river in South America. They are just so adorable and are one of my favorite animals. Love how they just hang with all sorts of other creatures.

Would you rather have the power to read minds or fly? Flying! I have enough thoughts as it is haha

Tagging @xthelastknownsurvivorx @xmelimelonx @cricketnationrise @orchidscript @sherryvalli @indomitable-love @henry-fox-biggest-stan @myheartalivewrites @athousandrooms @adinarj !

#tag games #about me

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1eos · 1 year

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lol i saw ur post abt t*m h*lland getting to call himself zendaya's man and it got me thinking... it's almost always the gorgeous girls who have the most hideous frog looking partners 😭😭 first we got beyonce with jay-z, momo with h**ch*l, and now zendaya with t*m (keep in mind she was also dating a cracker prior to cracker #2) 😔😔 it also made me remember abt ur post abt god putting gorgeous talented women on earth only for the devil to plant ugly ass men in their lives...

i say it all the time but the bridge troll of roc records snatching up beyonce before her frontal lobe baked fully (she was like 20 iirc) normalized gorgeous talented girls finding thee most random man to build with. it's sick. and what's most upsetting is that i can't even be that mad at mr cracker holland bc he one of the few weird looking dudes that do the bare minimum and from all accts treat his girl right. what kind of world are we living in where i can't even have full out beef cabuz a man did the BARE MINIMUM and was not publicly a freak? ladies n gays we need to have a meeting to up the caliber of cock ppl let into their lives 😭😭😭😭 like asap

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fallingsunflower · 1 year

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I feel so bad for him 😔 he doesn't deserve the hate he's getting. I get why people might be angry because of what he said but that's not a reason to be horrible. It just makes them look worse because they're literally saying horrible things about him. He didn't say it with bad intentions or to shade anyone. He just meant it in a way that he never forgets how lucky he is to be where he is now. He got rejected as a solo artist on X Factor and only got through as a band. If he wasn't put in 1D he would've been on his way home that day getting on with his life, none of us knowing who he is. There were a lot of contestants like him (from the same background) who have auditioned for X Factor yet they got rejected but he was lucky enough to have been chosen. That's what he meant. And I know he could've worded it better but the dude won a grammy for aoty and he probably didn't even think or realise what he was saying. And on top of that people in the audience shouting unecessary comments about how it should've been Beyonce or barely any of his peers showing him support apart from Taylor and Lizzo. That would've put me off aswell tbh. He was feeling a wave of different emotions. Happiness, nervousness, excitement, shocked etc. Why can't people just be supportive for once? Why is this world full of hatred and anger? Especially towards those that don't deserve it. What exactly did Harry do to them? There are literally problematic people in that industry yet celebs like Harry (who doesn't bother anyone) is the one that gets the most hate.

Idk. It was a good album. They all were. It wasn't my first choice for AOTY tbh but the feud is stupid. If Beyonce or literally anyone else won AOTY, then Harry's fans would be causing hell for everyone. I already saw people complaining that he was robbed and that Americans were ruining it for him (which let me know how that even fucking makes sense). There will always be people who complain

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destinyc1020 · 5 months

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I think it is great that Zendaya is doing a social media detox right now. To be honest, I don't think it is good for any celeb to spend any kind of time online given how toxic it is. If you go to Zendaya's IG page, most of her posts for the last couple of months are filled with so much negativity. I see the same thing happening on Twitter as well. Zendaya is at a level of fame where people get off on being mean and judgy because they don't view her as a human being with feelings. It is the same thing they did to Beyonce and Rihanna before her. There is a reason why so many celebs now have disappeared online or limit their post to promotional content only.

I totally agree Anon 👍🏾

I honestly don't blame celebs for staying off of social media, or for simply limiting their social media content to just work. 🤷🏾‍♀️

"Fans" and the GP have def crossed the line repeatedly when it comes to celebrities.... Then they wonder why their faves barely want to post online or interact with fans anymore. 🙄

Like the Bible says....You reap what you sow.

If Z is taking a break, then good for her!

People (even fans! 🥴) can be unnecessarily cruel, harsh, and judgmental towards celebrities online.... people that they don't even KNOW irl. 😔

Like you said, once celebs get to a certain level of fame, some people don't even view them as human with feelings. 😔 They just view them as some robot or public commodity, and that couldn't be further from the truth. These people are still HUMAN BEINGS.

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mybiasisexo · 2 years

Text

Entangled - Part 4

Pairing: Chanyeol x f.Reader

Chapter Warning: Language

Word Count: 5.5k

Author's Note: There's a lot that happens here lmao. Like I feel this is like 3 chapters jammed into one. I hope we can get a bit of insight on Channies thought process here, and maybe even OCs?? Also I LOVE this friend group and will add so many irrelevant scenes just to see them interact 🥺.

Also.... pls lmk if you would like to be tagged! There are a couple people who I want to but... dont wanna bother anyone haha. So, if you'd like that, just lmk 🙃

Also also.... have y'all listened to beyonces new album?!??!???????!? Was DEF listening to it HEAVY while editing this (Virgos groove was hitting a bit too hard christ she's done it again 😔 we stan forever)

Okay, I'm rambling (shocker) as always, don't be afraid to lmk how you feel about the story so far!!! I appreciate all interaction!!! Have fuuuun~

“Ah.” The calm that overtakes you as you lay back on the blanket separating you from the powdery sand is welcomed after the morning you’ve had. Just as you predicted, the sun is helping your hangover just as much as the food digesting in your belly.

It would’ve tasted a lot better without the bitter knowledge of Chanyeol’s apology, but the heat kissing your skin is enough of a distraction from that fact. “This is the life.”

“If I could, I would live a life strictly on the shore,” Seulgi agrees. She already sounds drowsy as she sprawls out like a starfish beside you.

Yerim is somewhere splashing along in the water, finally enjoying the crisp waves instead of taking pictures for her Instagram. Poor Seulgi spent the first ten minutes out as her photographer and is now finally having time for herself.

You aren’t sure how much time passes when Yerim joins you both. Cold drops of sea water drip onto your stomach alluding to her presence. You wince, eyes springing open to give the young girl a glare.

“Oops.” She shrugs innocently, her smile dazzling. You huff before rolling onto your stomach, evening out your tan. Yerim checks her phone and sucks her teeth, tossing it angrily aside before plopping onto her stomach across from you, so that your heads now huddle together.

“Still no word from Loey?” Seulgi asks. Her eyes are still closed, and she hasn’t moved an inch. Honestly, you thought she had fallen asleep.

You hate how your ears perk at the mention of your ex.

Yerim’s mouth tightens. “Nothing. We were supposed to get breakfast this morning. He had promised me that while kicking me out, to try to make up for what he was doing. But he hasn’t replied to any of my texts or calls!”

Her words trigger something in the back of your mind. Little fragments from the night before come to you in flashes, images of a pissed Yerim in front of your hotel room.

“He kicked you out?” You ask.

The sisters share a look before turning their attention back to you.

“What?” You snap. “I told you I blacked out.”

Yerim sighs dramatically and falls onto her back, blocking the sun with an arm draped over her eyes. “Yes, well, he did. Suddenly sharing a bed made him uncomfortable.”

“You two haven’t… you haven’t had sex yet?” You push out, swallowing the bile the question has rising up your throat.

She pauses and then bursts into laughter, saying your name conspiringly. “I had no idea you would be interested in my sex life.”

Oh, it isn’t hers you’re curious about.

You shrug non-committedly, glancing away.

“No, we haven’t,” she reveals. “This trip was the first time we’ve hung out outside my job, actually. Our first date. It was kind of funny. We both thought of coming here together at the same time. It sounded like the perfect idea then. Now? I’m starting to see how much it wasn’t.”

Relief floods you, relaxing your tense muscles. You wonder briefly how you would have reacted if they had slept together. Most likely seen red.

You halt those thoughts instantly. This is not your place anymore, not your right. You have zero claim on Chanyeol and whatever you are feeling right now is unwarranted.

Pushing away all that, you focus back on the conversation. “Because he kicked you out?”

She hums as she ponders your question. “That. And he’s in the wedding. He’s a groomsman, and that’s his main focus on the trip, not necessarily me. But also….”

She sighs and shifts around, getting comfortable. “He warned me, but I didn’t think he was being serious. At least, I didn’t think it was actually going to matter.”

“What did he warn you about?” Seulgi asks, voice quiet.

Yerim is silent for a breath before huffing, laughing mirthlessly. “He was engaged once.”

Your heart drops.

“He told me that he was engaged a few years ago, and that he was a bit worried that being in a wedding might… hurt.”

Just like you.

You honestly didn’t know what to think of Chanyeol going through the same thing as you, although this new perspective made your conversation from this morning make a bit more sense, made you understand his actions and words.

He was putting up a front, just like you.

“I told him to not worry about it too much,” Yerim continues, unaware of the epiphany you’re having. “Because I am here now. I’ll stay by his side. I’m not going anywhere. He laughed when I said that, and said he thought it was cute. To me, that sounded like that was enough for him. But, something changed after dinner yesterday. He was different, and well, I guess he was right about being worried after all.”

“Engaged, huh?” Is all you can say.

Yerim pouts. “It’s not like he was married and got a divorce. It’s only an engagement. Like…get over it?”

Her words sting. It feels like she’s speaking to you directly.

“Yerim….” Seulgi chastises gently, probably aware of how her statement might affect you. You can’t bring yourself to feel hurt, she’s right afterall. Plus, you can hear the hurt in her voice, the disappointment.

Reaching out, you touch her hand reassuringly. “Would you like me to beat him up for you?”

That brings out a bright laugh and you grin at the sound. “Apparently, you gave him a piece of your mind last night.”

You blink. “I did?”

“You weren’t very happy with him once you found out what he did to me, so you went to his room and confronted him.”

Chanyeol’s words from earlier echo in your brain. ‘We already had this conversation last night’.

“How did that go?” You question, hoping they can’t hear the rising panic in your voice.

‘Because you missed me’.

“Not sure,” she answers.

“We heard you banging on his door for a minute,” Seulgi informs.

You came knocking on my door like the police’.

You gulp.

“It got really quiet afterwards for like ten minutes or so. Then you started banging on our door because, of course, you didn’t have the key. You were pretty incoherent, mumbling something about him being an asshole, I think. Then you stumbled right to bed. Out like a light.”

You take in this newfound information warily. “So, you aren’t sure if I actually talked to him or not?”

“No. It could’ve been Sehun’s door. Hell, it could’ve been a damn wall you were hitting, you were that fucked up,” Seulgi says, chuckling at the memory.

So, there is still a chance Chanyeol was lying. Your certainty crumbles even further when a fresh memory from last night unlocks. It isn’t an image, but a feeling. Hands–fingers–ghosting up your stomach, your cheek.

You blink. Will you remember this? A whisper.

“Either way I appreciate it.” Yerim leans her head back to smile at you upside down, pulling you out of your reverie. “I love you, Sis.”

You smile in return, hoping it reaches your eyes as you pat her round cheek. She giggles, the sound should ease your heart. Instead, it brings another wave of guilt over you, making you shiver despite the heat of the sun overhead.

She readjusts, no longer staring up at you, and starts going on about something else, missing the way Seulgi and you lock eyes, worry and apprehension shared between you both.

Oh, how the knot tangles.

You spend a few more hours at the beach. Play in the water, take a nice afternoon nap, and just lounge around until you get a text from Sehun letting you know that the rehearsal is almost over and that they will all be eating lunch in his suite.

With that, you head back to your own room to get ready.

While in the elevator, Yerim’s phone pings. She checks the text and immediately lights up and starts squealing in excitement.

“What is it?” Seulgi asks, reveling in her sister’s delight.

“Loey just texted me!”

“What did he say?” You ask, playing as nonchalant as possible.

“He said that he’s sorry for not getting back to me this morning and missing breakfast. He said he overslept and woke up right before he had to go to rehearsal. He was wondering if he could make it up to me with lunch!”

“That’s… cute.” Seulgi’s smile becomes forced, and she turns to you with widening eyes that say, ‘what the hell’. You purse your lips as an unwelcoming bout of jealousy makes you consider telling the sisters that Chanyeol was indeed awake early enough to get breakfast this morning.

Not your place.

“I’m going to invite him to Sehun’s…. If that’s okay?” Yerim checks for confirmation. You both agree reluctantly.

She bounces on the balls of her feet excitedly as she types away. The doors open and you leap out, feeling trapped in the confines of the small metal box.

“Aw man. He wants it to be just us two. I hope you don’t mind me skipping out on lunch with everyone.”

“It’s no problem,” you reassure her, meaning it completely.

“Yeah, I’m sure you both have a lot to catch up on,” Seulgi adds.

That is that. You all take turns showering and start getting ready for lunch. You’re rushing a bit, wanting to see your friends and ask about the rehearsal, plus you’re starving. Chanyeol hadn’t given you much in his apology plate.

And, you hate to admit it, but you need a break from Yerim.

When Yerim is in the shower, Seulgi enters your room, sits on the corner of the bed, and watches you put your makeup on.

When your name finally leaves her mouth, you know you’re in trouble. It holds an authority you rarely hear her use. Slowly, you put down your mascara and turn in your chair, giving her your undivided attention.

“I love you,” she starts, voice deceivingly calm. “But Yerim is my sister. I can’t keep protecting you and Chanyeol. It’s not fair to her.”

“I know,” you say.

“We have to tell her,” she proceeds.

“I agree.”

Seulgi inhales deeply. “She’s going to be furious, but she has a right to know about you two. Especially since it seems you’re the reason why he kicked her out of their room.”

Her statement shocks you. “What?”

She throws you an incredulous look. “Are you telling me you didn’t see the way he was watching you throughout dinner? Not to mention how he would, like, study you whenever he touched Yerim? Like he was trying to get a reaction? Trying to make you jealous? I don’t know. Neither one of you have ever really told anyone why you broke up. It’s been a mystery for all of us, you know. We’ve been trying to solve it for years. I was hoping that seeing you both together would solve everything. But, to be honest, it’s only making things more confusing because….”

Her hands rub together, as though she’s putting on lotion. Her eyebrows furrow and her eyes are far away as she thinks about what she has seen. When she refocuses on you, you gulp, hating the distrust in her gaze. “I think Chanyeol is still in love with you.”

“Seulgi.” You don’t–no, can’t hear this right now, not when everything has become so much more complicated.

Her eyes pool with sorrow, for who you weren’t sure. “If Yerim is going to get her heart broken during this trip, I would rather it be from Yeol alone. I don’t want to hurt her, and I know you don’t want to either.”

You didn’t. Yerim is like a little sister to you. Damn Chanyeol for putting you in such a predicament.

“So, when do we tell her?” You ask, filled with a new resolve. You wanted to be done with all this unnecessary drama. “Right now? After lunch? Tomorrow before the wedding? When is the right time?”

“I think now is better than later. I can’t keep lying to her face.”

“I don’t want to lie anymore either. This is Chanyeol’s mess. Let’s tell her, and have him deal with explaining everything while they’re out.”

A couple knocks at your door cuts your conversation short. You both share a glance, not expecting guests.

“Maybe it’s Sehun?” You guess before getting to your feet to answer. “Lord knows he’s always so damn impatient.”

You trudge over and tear the door open.

“Dude, I swear we’re on our way….”

The height is expected. Chanyeol’s face? Not so much.

Speak of the devil….

He is wearing a cocky grin on his face, that swiftly falls the moment you grace his presence.

“Oh,” slips out of your mouth, expressing all the disappointment you feel at seeing him instead of your best friend. Although your heart begins racing, you find it a bit easier to be confronted with him this time around. Actually, the conversation you just had comes back to you, and you realize that you’re annoyed with him. “What are you doing here?”

He jerks back from your tone, probably shocked by how bored you sound. “I was just, um, I’m here to, uh, pick up–”

“Yerim,” You finish for him, nodding in confirmation. Right. Of course. His girlfriend.

With her name hovering between you, the atmosphere thickens awkwardly. You’re still mad at him, but it’s overwhelmed by a different disappointment than you felt prior. It takes a second, and then it clicks as to why you feel this. Wow, you really are stupid, huh? A foolish part of you had hoped that he was here to see you. But at the reminder that he has someone else, you are embarrassed to think something so delusional. You don’t know where to look–eyes jumping around randomly, only passing his face every few seconds. Your hands dangle uselessly at your sides, and all you can think is ‘abort, abort, ABORT’.

“I–right. Let me go get her.” Your voice betrays your disappointment.

You turn stiffly to do just that, but get pulled to a stop before you can even take a step into the room. Chanyeol’s strong hand curls posessively around the pit of your elbow, thumb resting on the sharp bone. You gasp and hold your breath, still as a statue as you anticipate his next move. Once he senses your attention, he lets his hand slither down the soft skin of your arm to wrap around your wrist.

“Wait.” Your name leaves his mouth in a gravelly whisper, causing your stomach to roll nauseatingly. Hesitantly, you turn your body back around to face him, and once your eyes lock, they hold on steadfast, as if that is where they are always meant to be.

“I….” His sentence gets caught in his throat as he continues staring at you. It’s as though your face is distracting him, rendering him the ability to even speak. There’s a question in his glittery orbs, but you can’t decipher what it is he’s asking.

“What is it?” You ask gently.

That seems to draw him out of his trance. He shakes his head in an attempt to clear it.

“Did you get my gift?” The way he asks makes your conversation feel more intimate, a private thing between only you.

You know instantly what he’s referencing: the food from earlier. Confirming your suspicions that it was indeed him, although you never had a doubt.

“I did,” you admit, albeit reluctantly.

His eyes narrow suspiciously. “Did you eat any of it?”

Even more reluctantly, “I did.”

“Good. That’s good.” And he does appear very relieved, knowing you accepted his ‘gift’. “I was worried.”

“Worried about what?” You push.

His eyes cut to you and you almost recoil from the intensity burning within them. “That you wouldn’t eat it, even though you were starving, because you knew it was from me.”

Ah, he still knows you well.

“I’m not that petty,” you mutter.

“Yes you are.” He grins before a thought occurs to him, causing the smile to fall just as quickly as it formed. “At least, you were.”

That kills the peace you two had created.

“Anyways,” he starts, scratching the back of his neck. “I wanted to apologize for the way I acted earlier. It was wrong for me to say all of that. I just, I don’t know, wanted to try to be normal, for Junmyeon’s sake, but….”

He shrugs helplessly, and you feel that–the helplessness. Despite digging this hole, Chanyeol is just as stuck as you are.

“What about this morning was ‘normal’?” You ask, feeling the anguish from earlier take over your body. “You were trying to upset me. Is that what all of this is? One big ploy to make me feel like shit?”

“That’s not….” He lets out a heavy sigh and runs a hand over his face. “I’m really bad at this. I don’t want to fight, I want us to start over. To be friends.”

You give him an incredulous look that he meets earnestly. Looking at him, at that angelic face that was once your whole world, you realize that what he is asking is impossible. There’s too much history here, too many unresolved issues for you both to move forward on friendly terms.

“I don’t know, Chanyeol,” you say quietly. “I think we’re far from becoming friends, and I don’t really want to be. We only have a few more days here, so let’s just keep pretending we don’t know each other. Hell, we don’t even have to pretend. I don’t know you anymore.”

“And who’s fault is that?” He asks, voice rising in a sudden anger that makes you flinch. “I wasn’t the one who called off the wedding, remember? That was you. You were the one who decided I wasn’t worth forever anymore, not the other way around!”

“Is that what you think?” You hiss, just as upset. “That’s never what I meant! And why would you even care anymore? You’ve moved on, haven’t you? Do I have to keep reminding you that you have a girlfriend?” Who isn’t me, you want to add.

“Why do you keep calling her that?” He asks, exasperated. You’re sure that if he wasn’t still holding onto your wrist like a leash, he’d be pacing the hall. “She’s just my date! We aren’t serious!”

“Does she know that?” You question. “I have a feeling that if I asked, she’d say differently.”

His eyes bounce back and forth between yours, searching for the right answer. He deflates, knowing what it is. “I already told you, I don’t want to fight. I didn’t come here for that.”

“No, because you came here for her.”

You both hear it, the pain that rips from your chest. It causes you both to pause. You’re mortified, and it skyrockets when he seems to soften. He stares down at you fondly, and his stance straightens.

“I came here to make things right,” he reveals, voice just as tender as his expression.

“And how are you going to do that?”

“I’m going to take her to lunch as promised.”

You slowly nod at that. “As you should. It’s for the best.”

“Is it?” He questions.

Seulgi’s words echo in your head, “I think Chanyeol is still in love with you.”

And with the way he is admiring you, you can see it. Your heart quickens at the idea of him still wanting you. You want to relish in it, in his affection, his touch. Your attraction for him never completely ceased, no matter how many times you have told yourself otherwise. If you are around him for much longer, you are going to give into the temptation that is his mouth, his big hands, his unbreaking steady gaze.

You want to believe what he just insinuated. He came here to make things right, he said. Not just with Yerim, but maybe with you too. You want to believe that the girl getting ready, oblivious to what’s happening only a few feet away, isn’t the only reason why he is standing before you right now, that you still have a claim on him.

“It has to be.” You tell the both of you, drawing the line in the sand for both not to cross.

And yet he still pushes. “And why is that?”

Because I’m terrified of what will happen if we keep meeting like this.

“Because she’s your date.”

He nods in agreement just as you had before.

“You want to know the real reason why I brought her,” he asks suddenly.

You should say no. You should walk away and forget the man before you. To keep pretending he means nothing to you. But, the most selfish part of you wins. You need to know. So you nod, allowing him to destroy all pretenses between you both.

“As an excuse,” he whispers, gauging your reaction. “To stay away from you.”

You think you should probably feel angry by his confession, but you don’t. Maybe you’re reading a bit more into it, but you find it has you swooning.

He takes a step forward, causing your head to fall back to keep looking at him. His hand finally falls from your wrist, lifting to cup your jaw, making sure you can’t see anything but him.

Still in a whisper, he continues. “But since last night, the excuse has changed.”

His thumb caresses your cheek. “Now I’m using her as a way to see you. To talk to you. Because that’s the only way you will.”

“That’s not fair.”

He smiles ruefully. “It really isn’t, is it?”

You can’t help but scoff. “You’re such an–”

“Asshole?” He finishes with a smug grin. “I know.”

A silence falls over you, and you’re observing him so closely, admiring him in a way that feels so familiar it’s nearly effortless, that you catch the shift. His eyes darken with intent as they latch onto your slightly open mouth with laser focus.

You stiffen in his grip, holding your breath as you wait for him to close the distance. So much for that line in the sand.

His head tilts slightly, hair tickles your forehead, nose brushes against yours.

You can’t.

“I’ll tell Yerim you stopped by,” you let out in a shaky breath, lips nearly brushing against his.

His eyes have fallen shut, and he keeps them closed as he briefly rests his forehead against yours, catching his barings.

“Right.” Reluctantly, he pulls away, taking steps back so that he’s in the middle of the hallway, and you get a bout of deja vu. You were in a similar situation before, were you not? Only now the roles have reversed.

“Tell her to come to my room when she’s ready.” His tone is professional, no ounce of emotion can be heard, as if he weren’t seconds away from kissing you.

It makes you cold.

With that, he swiftly turns and heads the two doors down to his own suite.

You stand there for a moment, collecting yourself. You can’t seem to shake off the frigidness that chills you with the lack of his warmth. Your hands go to your jaw, fingers touching the parts Chanyeol had cradled, fighting the overwhelming need to scream.

You need to tell Yerim her date is ready for her. Right. You slip back into your suite to do just that.

Only to be stopped by Seulgi standing a few feet away, expression hard to read.

A staring match commences. It feels like she’s your parent having caught you red handed trying to creep back into the house after sneaking out.

Yerim comes out of their room, ready to go.

“I thought I heard knocking. Was someone here?” She asks, unaware of the silent battle going on in front of her.

“Chanyeol,” you answer, attention never leaving her sister.

“Who?”

You grit your teeth, growing more agitated with her. How can she not know the name of the man she claims to be falling for?

“Loey stopped by,” Seulgi speaks, voice steel, eyes unwavering. “But you were still getting ready. He asked us to tell you to head over to his room when you were finished. Right?”

The question is aimed at you. She lifts her eyebrow, challenging you to correct her.

“...Right.” You lose the staring contest as you agree, guilt casting your eyes down.

“Oh shit! I need to hurry then!” Yerim runs off.

Your wrist and jaw still burn from the ghost of Chanyeol’s touch.

“The food got here before you did,” are Sehun’s first words when you trudge into his room fifteen minutes later. Seulgi hasn’t spoken a word to you since Yerim left your suite, and you can’t blame her. Although, you wish she’d actually communicate her feelings towards you right now.

You can’t stand her being angry with you.

This is not your first disagreement. You’ve argued numerous times. That doesn’t make it any easier though, especially since you can’t really defend yourself.

“Sorry,” you say distractedly as you search the room for someone in particular. There he is! You march right over to Jongin and throw your arms around his slender torso, burying your head into the crook of his neck.

He freezes only for a second, surprised, and then he’s returning the hug, swaying you back and forth comfortingly.

“God, you give the best hugs,” you mumble against his warm skin.

He chuckles into your hair. “You seem like you really need one.”

“You have no idea.” Satisfied, you pull back, stewing in your bad mood. He clips your chin fondly and then leads you over to the counter that’s pouring over with food.

You all huddle in the living room, sitting in a circle on the floor. All the groom’s men are present except Chanyeol.

“Oh! I have important news!” Jongdae begins excitedly, gaining everyone’s attention. “Eunhee is pregnant.”

“WHAT?!” You all yell. Eunhee is Jongdae’s longtime girlfriend.

He’s glowing from joy. “I know. I should have told you all yesterday, but there was already a lot going on and Junmyeon was the main event. I didn’t want to take away from him. But, yeah, I’m going to be a father!”

“Is that why she’s not here?” Sehun asks.

Jongdae nods. “She’s not that far along, but we didn’t want to take any risks.”

“Oh, gosh,” Seulgi coos. “I’m so happy for you.”

“I’m going to be an uncle!” Jongin cheers.

“You already are an uncle!” Jongdae points out, reminding Jongin of the fact he has sisters with children.

“Okay, but this is different!”

“So, we have one friend getting married, and now another having a kid.” Baekhyun says, shaking his head in disbelief. “Boy, are we getting old.”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” you mutter bitterly. Your comment causes the others to chuckle.

“It was bound to happen eventually,” Sehun says, reaching over to pat your back. “But hey, we’re not doing too bad on this life thing. I’m proud of all of us.”

“Do you have any secret lovers or children we should know about?” You ask the proud best man with narrowed eyes.

Sehun rolls his eyes. “As much as I love Busan, I haven’t found anyone that I feel particularly connected to yet. The restaurant keeps me busy. As for children, I have Vivi, and I enjoy spoiling that boy too much. I don’t think I’m ready to have another one.”

“Vivi?” Seulgi asks skeptically. He merely shrugs.

Vivi is his dog.

“I know it’s a rather touchy subject,” Jongdae begins. “But you haven’t been with anyone since Chanyeol, have you?”

Just hearing his name causes your palms to sweat. You have to actively avoid glancing at Seulgi to gauge her reaction.

“I mean,” you start carefully. “I have needs. But, no. I haven’t been with anyone seriously since. To be honest, I think it’s been a year since I last humored anyone.”

“It’s the same for him too, you know?” Baekhyun reveals.

“Where’s the bathroom?” Seulgi abruptly asks Sehun, who shows her. She excuses herself and it’s silent as you all watch her disappear. Once she’s gone, all eyes are on you.

“Chanyeol told me about bringing a date,” Baekhyun admits in a hurry, sensing that you’re on borrowed time. “He told me it was because he couldn’t face you alone. I told him that was the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard. But you know Yeol, once he’s made up his mind about something, there’s no talking him out of it.”

“I know,” you answer quietly. He couldn’t face you alone? Well, it does line up to what he revealed earlier, that he brought Yerim as a way to avoid you. God, what an idiot.

“He’s an asshole,” Jongin speaks up. You lift an eyebrow at that, Jongin isn’t one to be so… vulgar. “And just so you know, we’re all on your side.”

“Hell yeah, we are.” Jongdae agrees, holding up a fist. “Fighting.”

“He shouldn’t have pretended to not know us,” Baekhyun frowns. He must still be hurting over his best friend’s rejection.

“It wasn’t smart.” Sehun turns to you. “Did you talk to Yerim?”

“I was going to,” you start and he groans. “Sehun, really! I was! But then Chanyeol showed up and whisked her away. That’s why she’s not here right now.”

“He really has a lot of balls, bringing another girl knowing you were going to be here,” Jongdae seethes.

“Guys,” you’re quick to defend. “It’s been years. He’s allowed to bring whoever he wants. Allowed to date whoever he wants. We’re no longer together.”

They all scoff.

“I know it’s not my place,” Baekhyun, king instigator, begins. “But you and Yeol were perfect together. You complete each other, and neither one of you have been the same since the breakup. I genuinely hope that the two of you can work it out.”

“As soon as he gets rid of that high schooler,” Jongin adds.

“She’s in college,” you correct weakly.

Conversation finally turns to something else, and it’s perfect timing because Seulgi rejoins right after.

You spend the next hour chatting and goofing off. It feels so good to be back with your closest friends. You can’t help but get nostalgic, comparing the people you all are today to the carefree group of kids you were when you all first got together.

Unfortunately, time flies by while having fun, and the boys have a bachelor’s party to throw.

“I wish I were a boy. That way I could tag along,” you say forlornly.

“Junmyeon wants you both there!” Jongin says, swinging your hands in his. “Just come.”

“We can’t,” Seulgi declines. “It wouldn’t look good. Watch over our boy though. Show him a good time.”

“I told him we should’ve gone to the states,” Baekhyun sighs dramatically. “We could’ve gone to Las Vegas, gone to a strip club!”

At the mention of a strip club, both Baekhyun and Jongin start doing body rolls. Jongdae pretends to make money rain on them.

“Don’t get him fucked up!” You threaten, pointing at the kinky troublemakers. “Tomorrow is going to be the most important day of his life, and he cannot be hungover through it!”

“Ma’am, yes, Ma’am,” Jongdae and Baekhyun salute before giggling to each other.

Yeah, that didn’t look good.

“I’m not drinking,” Sehun reassures, throwing an arm around your shoulders. “As best man, I have to make sure everyone makes it back to the hotel in one piece.”

“You sure it’s not because Junmyeon punished you for this morning?” You tease.

He shoves you away. “Just for that, you’re not coming.”

You stick your tongue out at him. “I wasn’t going anyway, Nerd.”

You all head out of Sehun’s suite. Seulgi and you wave them farewell as they make their way to the elevators.

Seulgi sighs once it’s just the two of you. “I’m jealous.”

“Same. They’re our friends too.”

You both share a watery pout and then Seulgi is pulling out her key to enter the room.

“Wait.” You rest your hand over hers. She lifts her eyebrows expectantly at you. “I’m sorry.”

She takes a deep breath and rubs her temples. “This is so fucked. I hate lying to Yerim like this.”

“I know,” you say. “You’re now caught in the middle of something that has nothing to do with you. I’m going to fix this. Yerim should be back now. I’ll tell her everything. I promise.”

She gives you a weak smile before pulling you in for a hug. “Thank you.”

“You’re my best friend,” you answer simply. “My sister. Both of you are. It’ll be easier on everyone once Yerim knows.”

“I love you too,” she replies. That brings a goofy grin out of you, knowing that you’re forgiven.

Visibly in a better mood, she enters the hotel room in a flourish.

Only for you both to stop dead in your tracks when you see Yerim sobbing in the living room.

“Yerim!” Seulgi rushes over to her sister. You join a bit later, apprehension slowing your limbs as you hover over the bawling girl. “What is it? What happened?”

“Loey!” She wails. You share a nervous look with Seulgi. “Loey broke up with me!”

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