#what n does do? he processes the world through formulas. makes sense of everything around him with numbers

[claitea]

ok sorry i just really loved the thought of n arguing with this little thing i wanted to draw it

Do you ever think about how almost all of N’s Pokémon throughout the first games were one offs he released after he battled you, how he cared about them all deeply enough that he thought it would be selfish to have them battle more than necessary. And do you ever think about how this is the case with all his Pokémon EXCEPT his Klinklang in the final battle at the league, where the second to last battle he had a Klink and this Klinklang is very likely that same Pokémon? Do you think this was a visual representation of his mindset wavering from a fixed point? How that Klink refused to leave him right away and he couldn’t bring himself to force them to leave because his mind is in so many different directions? He can keep them around just a little longer until he becomes champion, it won’t be long, he can bend things some so long as he doesn’t fully stray from his path…right?

Or is that just me am I the only one willing to be insane about Klinklang of all Pokémon

[kiribaku-queen]

You’re Not the One

Pairing: Todoroki x reader, Bakugou x reader

Drama, Angst?, pregnant!AU, happy ending

Word count: 6.4K

A/N: I was supposed to upload this multiple Friday’s ago… But enjoy this quick but long oneshot I have made! Let me know what you think! Do you like having oneshots like this or the series better?

Summary: No one prepared you for motherhood. You didn’t even know the first step to being a parent. What’s even worse was that you were doing it all alone. Will you let a knight in shining armor save you from distress or will you let the father of your child come back in your life and have the perfect family you always wanted?

Bakugou arrived at your apartment all busted up. It was a rough day at work and all he wanted to do right now was lay in bed with you in his arms. He didn’t want to think about how he let a villain get away. Or how he had to defeat a group of people all on his own with no backup, causing all those cuts and bruises. Or how management came running and yelled at him for his attitude towards his fans. He didn’t need anymore chaos. He didn’t want anymore problems. But that’s not how life works does it?

“I’m pregnant.”

Of course you were. Bakugou took a deep breath in and violently let it out, running his fingers through his hair. No, he wasn’t happy. He was already overwhelmed with trying to become the best that he could be at his job. He didn’t need another inconvenience in his way.

You frowned upon seeing his reaction. That definitely wasn’t the reaction you were hoping for. You were expecting shock, for sure. But mad? Angry? Disappointed? Never in a million years.

“What’s with that reaction? Are you not happy?” you asked, shaking a bit. You already knew this wasn’t going to go well when you saw that he wasn’t scooping you up in his arms. He was pacing around the room now.

“I just can’t deal with this news right now.” He told you. You furrowed your brows in concern. Seeing how he was acting right now, you could tell it had to do something with work. Bakugou sat down on the edge of the bed and you joined him, gently holding onto his arm.

“Was it work again?” you asked, already knowing the answer.

“Yeah. I’m already stressed out. I don’t need this pregnant news stressing me out even more!” he started to raise his voice. It wasn’t the first time you heard him raise his voice. You know he doesn’t mean to sometimes, but it always frightens you. He never put a hand on you when he was mad but when he gets like this, you just never know when he’s about to snap and finally do it. That’s how scary he could be sometimes.

“Well, I was hoping that me being pregnant would lessen your stress? Because it should be happy news?” It made sense to you. Having a baby with someone you loved should be the happiest news of your life. And after having a rough day at work, you would think that coming home to good news would be the highlight of the day. But it looks like you were wrong. Did you just make things worse for him?

“I don’t even know how to take care of a baby,” he huffed. You got up from the bed and comforted him from behind. You wrapped your arms around his waist, pressed your chest up against his back, and laid your cheek on his back.

“You think I know either? We can both learn,” you tried to convince him. But it didn’t look like it was working. You started to become anxious and fidgety. This was not supposed to happen tonight. You pictured it so differently in your head and it was all going down the drain.

“No, I can’t take care of this baby,” he shook his head. That left a tight feeling in your chest.

“Cant? Or don’t want to?” you dared to ask.

“Don’t want to,” he replied softly.

“Katsuki!” you desperately called out his name. You heart was breaking. A lump was forming in your throat and tears were threatening to spill over.

“(y/n)!” he called out just as desperate. “I’m so overwhelmed right now! I’m loaded with paperwork. I’m constantly working over time. I don’t get days off. I don’t get breaks. I’m at the peak of my career right now. I can barely take care of you, how can I take of a child that requires more attention than you need on a daily basis?” That last one hurt. You stood there in awe at how he could say that so easily. You didn’t even know what to say. All of this was coming out of nowhere. You both stood still in silence. Bakugou was huffing and puffing by himself while you were trying to process everything he was saying and weighing out your options. If Bakugou didn’t want this baby, you had a few options ahead of you. But before you could think too much, your boyfriend said something that was beyond forgivable. “Get rid of it.”

“Bakugou Katsuki.” Your eyes snapped at him, sudden anger took over you. Out of all the things he could say, he just had to say the most hurtful thing. You could take the criticism. You could take all his anger, his confusion, and his fright. You could take his uncertainness right now because it was sudden news. Both of you never talked about having kids. It only makes sense that he was uncertain about his abilities about being a father. But this. This was going too far. It was unacceptable. No matter how much he didn’t like the idea of you being pregnant or how much he was unprepared to be a dad, he treaded across a forbidden place that was never meant to be crossed. “You take that back right now.”

“No. You either get rid of the baby or I’m leaving,” he gave you the ultimatum. But it was a no brainer.

“I’m keeping the baby,” you say confidently. You were more confident in your answer, more than ever. But that didn’t stop the crushing pain in your chest. The feeling was getting more intense the more you kept looking at him. Bakugou nods his head in acknowledgement. He picks up his work stuff and heads straight to the door. As soon as he opens the door, you scream out his name causing him to stop in his tracks.

“You walk out that door and I swear on my life, you will never see this child,” You threatened. You were shaking with anger, eyes glaring in his direction. Bakugou hesitates. He’s paused at the opened door. And for a split second, you could see a sliver of hope that he comes back to you. But you were wrong. He’s out that door, out of your apartment, and out of your life just like that.

 You were left utterly devasted and completely alone to raise the baby. Honestly, being pregnant was the easy part. What comes after that? Now that was a challenge. It was probably an understatement to say that raising your baby was a challenge. You were struggling. Raising a baby by yourself was hard. There were times when you didn’t know why your baby was crying in the middle of the night. Was he hungry? Did his diaper need to be changed? Did he just want to be held? But sometimes, you would do all that and he would still be crying, making you stay up all night and not get a wink of sleep. There are days were you can’t function properly because of the lack of sleep you would get.

And if that wasn’t enough, you were having a hard time financially keeping you stable. Diapers, formula, and other baby necessities were expensive. You were barely left with enough money to buy food or buy groceries. Maybe a few times a week, you wouldn’t get to eat anything because you didn’t have enough money. And you had to juggle between having a full time job and being a full time mom. You were constantly working around the clock. Everyday, you would be left physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted. You can’t even spend time to yourself because you have to tend to your child.

You were rocking your child to sleep, watching as his eyes got heavier and heavier. A sad smile reached your lips but tears trickled down your cheeks.

“Mommy’s having a hard time,” you whispered to your son, sobbing. Yes, the pressure of being a mom got to you. It got to you so bad that you cried every night. God, you were so stressed out and miserable. But even though there were so many hardships that you faced, it was all worth it. It was worth going through all that just to see your son laugh and smile and grow. Despite all the frustrations you went through on a daily basis, you knew it was going to pay off in the end. You loved your son. He captured your heart as soon as he came out. Mommy was having a hard time but you wouldn’t change this for the world.

Just when life was about to get you down, things started to lighten up. You bit your lip and internally cheered when you found out that you had enough money for groceries. You actually had a lot of money left over to buy whatever you wanted. But you were starving. As soon as you got to the grocery store, you made up your mind to stock up on supplies in case you have one of those days again.

You put little Ryota in the seat of the cart and proceeded to go down all the aisles, getting everything you deemed necessary to store in your pantry. While you were at it, you might as well get ingredients to prep yourself a nice dinner for tonight. It’s been a while since you had an actual, homecooked meal.

“Alright, which one should I get baby?” you asked your son, Ryota. He wasn’t old enough to speak yet. Only babbling here and there. Yet, you were constantly talking to him like he could understand you. It was somewhat comforting. You held out two options for him to choose from. Ryota stuck out both his hands, gravitating to the one on the left. You smiled.

“Yeah, I thought so. Good choice, my love,” you squeezed both his cheeks and smothered him with kisses. You then put Ryota’s choice inside the cart and put the other option back. When you went to put that away, another hand was reaching in the same direction, making both of your hands bump into each other.

“Oh, I’m sorr – Shouto?” you began to apologize but once you looked up, you recognized that iconic hair and scar anywhere. He was tall. Taller than you remember. The middle of his hair was swooped backwards, showing his forehead. His build was as impressive as ever and he was carrying a basket of groceries.

“Ah, (y/n). It’s been a while,” he was just as shocked as you were. It’s been what, 7? 8 years? You haven’t seen each other since your school days.

“It has, hasn’t it? Have you been well?” you struck up a conversation. He gave you a soft smile and stuffed his free hand in his pocket. He hummed in response and looked over you shoulder to see your child.

“Looks like you’ve been doing well, too. What’s his name?” he asked, going up to your son and trying to make him laugh. It was working because Ryota seemed to look like he liked him.

“Ryota,” you responded, admiring the way Shouto was playing with your son. It was a weird feeling. You were the one always around your son. Sure, some people held him but it was rare for Ryota to be interacting with a male. It was weird, but a refreshing sight.

“He’s cute. Ah,” he stood up and faced you. “How’s Bakugou doing?” Ouch. He opened up a wound that you were trying to suppress for all these months.

“Oh, um… We’re not…” you tried to explain without it being too awkward, but it wasn’t working. Immediate regret showed on Shouto’s face. He looked back to Ryota and back at you, the realization sinking in. You guess you couldn’t blame him though. Ryota looked exactly like Bakugou. Dirty blonde hair and fiery, red eyes. A mini me of the man who broke your heart. But it’s okay, because now, a new man came into your life. Both of you also weren’t public about your breakup. It was messy anyway. Only a few people really know what happened.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t-”

“It’s okay!” You interrupted him, waving your hands in front of you. It wasn’t his fault that he didn’t know. “Where you trying to get this?” you changed the subject, lifting up the box that you were putting away. Shouto glanced at the box in your hands and nodded. He took it from you and added it to his basket. Now you were both awkwardly standing there together, not knowing what to say. Ryota was huffing and puffing behind you, letting you know that it was time to go. You excused yourself and headed towards the check out aisle.

You bagged all your groceries and groaned in agony. You walked to the store and you really underestimated how much you bought. How were you going to carry all those groceries and carry Ryota. He can’t even walk yet. But you got to do what you got to do. You grabbed one bag and all of a sudden, it was pulled away from your grip. You looked up to see Shouto grabbing all your groceries.

“What are you doing? I can handle it,” you reassured him, but he wouldn’t budge. He continued to grab everything, and soon, all of your groceries were in both of his hands.

“You need to carry him. I can carry this for you,” he offered. Well, it wasn’t really an offer. You bit your lip because you did need help, but you also felt bad for making him carry your belongings. But Shouto was already at the exit, waiting for you to catch up to him. Not wanting to waste any more of his time, you picked up Ryota and chased after him.

Thank god your apartment wasn’t too far. Shouto graciously carried all those bags for you, setting them down on your kitchen floor. You rushed to put Ryota in his crib since he fell asleep on your shoulder on the walk home. When you set him down and made sure he was comfortable, you returned to your kitchen where Shouto was standing.

“Thank you so much, Shouto. I really appreciate it,” you thanked him, still feeling bad and guilty for allowing him to do such a task.

“It’s no problem. It looked like you were struggling,” he says, letting you know that he didn’t mind at all. “Well, I should get going. Call me if you need more help.” He says before making his way to the door. Before he exits your apartment, you were quick to stop him.

“Do you want to stay for dinner? As a thank you for bringing up my groceries?” you offered. He stood there for a minute, debating on whether or not to take the offer. But you gave him those pleading eyes because you had no else to thank him. After much facial persuading, he eventually took up on your offer and stayed for dinner.

Halfway through to making dinner, Ryota woke up crying. You were about to go comfort him when you saw Shouto already on the move. He cradled Ryota in his arms and rocked him back and forth until he calmed down. That shocked you. You weren’t expecting him to take action like that.

“Ah, I can take him” you tried to take Ryota away from him but Ryota was holding onto Shouto tightly. Huh? Your son didn’t know Shouto yet he was hanging onto him like his life depended on it. You playfully frowned and Shouto chuckled.

“I can take care of him while you cook,” he said. You were reluctant at first, but eventually agreed. There was no use fighting Shouto when he already has his mind set on something. So you continued cooking, checking up on the boys once in a while. Bu seeing Shouto play and laugh with your son made you smile. And when you say smile, you’re smiling hard. Like grinning from ear to ear. The sight was cute and heartwarming. You couldn’t thank him enough for looking after your son because you finally got a break to yourself. Even if you were cooking, you were put into a state of mind where it was just you. And you could focus on yourself and just enjoy the cooking process.

Having Shouto over for dinner and letting him look over your son was a great break for you. But it was time to get back into the groove again. You were about to go grocery shopping again for tonight’s dinner when a knock was heard on your door. Strange. You weren’t expecting company. You opened the door with curiosity and was surprised to see Todoroki Shouto waiting at your door.

“What are you doing here?” you questioned him with surprise. He lifted a bag filled with different kinds of ingredients.

“Let me make you dinner,” he says. “To thank you for cooking me dinner yesterday.” You smiled at his kindness, but you had to respectfully decline.

“But dinner yesterday was to thank you for carrying my groceries!” you explained but he wasn’t having it.

“And now I’m thanking you for thanking me,” he shakes the bag, waiting for you to let him in. God, you couldn’t say no to that face. And so you let him in. From then on, he was coming over every day. Cooking dinner started to become a routine, both of you alternating nights on who cooks when. Sometimes you would even cook together. With Shouto coming over, you were able to get more alone time and relaxation from taking care of the baby. But that also means you were spending more time with him. The more he came over, the more you bonded with him. Let’s not forget Ryota. It was an understatement to say that he liked Shouto. Every time he’s over, your son would cling to him every chance he got. And soon, Shouto was coming over for more than just dinner. You thought it was because he wanted to spend time with Ryota. Afterall, he was treating your son like he was his own. But you soon came to realize that that was only half the story.

 4 years later

Bakugou had the day off so he made his way to his nearest grocery store for some snacks. He hadn’t heard from you since that day. After he walked out, he needed a while to get back to his senses and calm down. But by the time he was ready to face you again, you had disappeared from his life. You blocked all types of communication from him and moved apartments. He didn’t think of you often. But whenever he saw a child with their mother, that’s when he started thinking of what ifs. And if you were doing okay. Did you have the baby? Or did you end up losing the baby? Was it a boy or girl? What was their name? Did they look like him? Many questions ran through his mind that he knew won’t get answered any time soon.

He grabbed a basket and went straight to the snack aisle. On the way there, he noticed a woman was having trouble getting something from the top shelf. He was thinking about ignoring her and keep on his merry way. But there was something about her back side that seemed familiar. And he couldn’t ignore his hero instincts to help those in need. He went over to her and grabbed the she was reaching for and handed it to her. But when he looked at who the woman was, his heart skipped a beat.

It was you.

Looking at him with wide eyes.

“(y/n)…” he muttered your name out of instinct. You quickly grabbed your item and stuffed it in your cart.

“Bakugou… thank you,” you muttered right back. God, he hasn’t seen you in so long. And you looked great as ever. Healthy. Happy. He looked around you. No baby.

“You’ve been good?” he asked. Shit, why was this so awkward. You nodded, giving him a small smile that was obviously very forced.

“Mhm, you?”

“Yeah.”

Silence.

The curiosity got the better of him. He just had to ask.

“What about the baby-”

“There is no baby,” you interrupted him very abruptly. Bakugou physically felt his heart crack. There… was no baby? Fuck, now he felt like the worst person in the world. He stared at you, completely and utterly devastated by the news. His eyes were wide with shock, his mouth hung low. He wanted to say something so bad, but the words just got caught in his throat. Bakugou just couldn’t believe that there was no baby. And after he said all those awful things to you. The end result was no baby?

“(y/n), I’m-” he wanted to apologize so badly, but was interrupted by the shouting of a young child.

“Mommy! Can I have this one?” the blonde child asked you, showing you the bag of chips he found. Both of you looked down at the child. Wait a minute. Blonde hair. Red eyes. It was like Bakugou was looking in a mirror. You, eyes wide with panic, looked down at your child then back at Bakugou. You grabbed the bag from your son and gave him a sweet smile.

“Sure, honey. Let’s go home now okay?” you told your son. You looked back up at Bakugou, giving him a curt bow and took your sons hand. Your son was looking up at Bakugou with big, curious eyes but eventually followed you out. Bakugou didn’t have time to react. All he could think about was, that was his son. He looked exactly like him. There was no way that wasn’t his son. And it was too late. You were gone. He was gone. He ruined everything. A single tear dropped down on his cheek as he realized what he missed out on.

 You took your son to the playground so he could get some exercise in. Sitting on one of the benches, hand-in-hand with your boyfriend, Shouto, you watched as your son played tag with a few of the other neighborhood boys. Since that day you ran into Bakugou, your mind was running wild. You straight up lied to his face about Ryota. But he didn’t say anything. Maybe he thought it was someone else? God, but he said ‘Mommy’ right in front of him. Maybe he thinks it’s not his? But they look exactly alike. You internally groan and leaned your head on Shouto’s shoulder.

“What are you thinking about?” he chuckled at you, petting your head lovingly.

“Just things,” you reply shortly. You didn’t want to bring up the topic of your ex-boyfriend, who just happened to be the father of your child. Shouto would get jealous and you didn’t want to cause anymore drama.

“You’re thinking about it again, aren’t you?” Gahh, he knew you too well. He squeezed your hand in his in reassurance. “Look, if he wanted to be in Ryota’s life, he would have tried to contact you by now. And even if did contact you and wants to be in his life, then, I would respect that.” You look up at your boyfriend with a pout and concern eyes.

“Are you sure?” you ask. He looks down at you and gave your cheeks a nice, hard pinch.

“Yes. Ryota deserves to have his biological father in his life,” he reasons. Okay, fair enough. But he didn’t even want to be in your son’s life in the first place. It was so simple for him to abandon you while you were pregnant. And after all the hardships you had to go through, now he wants to be a present father?

“He doesn’t have to know who his real father is,” you say, crossing your arms across your chest.

“(y/n),” Shouto says your name in a warning tone. But you put your defenses up.

“What? I don’t know if I even want him in Ryota’s life,” you confess. Shouto wraps his arm around your waist and pulls you in close.

“Well, think about it. And if Bakugou comes around, you can either accept or reject him. I will be there to support you every step of the way. And if he tries to make a scene, I’ll be there to stop him,” he promises you. That comforts you a lot to know that Shouto will be there for you no matter what. He was always like that. From the moment he entered in you and your son’s life.

“Okay, I love you,” you whispered, puckering out your lips. He laughs and kisses your duck lips.

“I love you, too.” And gives you a few more kisses. You look back at the playground to watch your son play. Panic starts to rise in you. You look to the left. Ryota wasn’t there. You look to the right. He wasn’t there either. You sit straight up and scan the playground one more time for your child, but he was nowhere to be seen.

“Ryota?” you call out his name. Shouto also realizes that Ryota was missing. He’s already up on his feet, calling out your son’s name and searching the playground. Your lips began to quiver and your legs began to shake. This was not happening right now. Shouto frantically whipped his head around, trying to see if he could get a glimpse of Ryota running off. That’s when he saw him. As soon as he turned his head to the side, he saw Ryota heading into an alleyway. Immediately, Shouto was running full speed in that same direction. You saw Shouto running and ran after him. He was too fast for you to catch up, but you ran anyway

Bakugou was on patrol duty for the day. He hated these days because all he had to do was roam around the city streets to make sure everyone was kept safe. He would catch villains here and there, but patrol duty was so boring for him. Until today. He was walking down the sidewalk in his hero costume when a little boy suddenly came out of nowhere, almost making him fall on top of him.

“Oi, kid! Watch where you’re going!” Bakugou scolded the young one. The child looked up and Bakugou froze in his tracks. This had to be fate. His son… Your son just so happens to run into him. Today out of all days? The blonde boy is looking up at Bakugou in awe.

“Mister? Are you a hero?” he asks. Bakugou smirks and kneels down so that he’s at his level.

“I am. What’s your name kid?”

“Ryota!” Ryota says his name in full confidence, grinning from ear to ear. Ryota… so that’s his name. Bakugou could feel his heart warm up at the sight of the boy.

“Little Ryota, where are your parents?” he asked. He looked around but it looked like Ryota ran off by himself. Looks like it was his job to help find his parents. That means finding you. He was starting to get his hopes up. If he ran into you, then he could try to apologize and maybe, just maybe, start things over.

“Ryota!” a man shouted the boy’s name. Bakugou looked up and an old classmate of his was scooping up Ryota in his arms. “Don’t run off like that! You had us scared to death!” he scolded the boy, but was relieved that he wasn’t hurt.

“Sorry, daddy,” the boy apologized. Ha? Daddy? Bakugou looked at the man and scoffed. Both men looked at each other and the atmosphere got chillingly cold.

“Bakugou,” the man said his name as a greeting. Bakugou frowned.

“Half-and-Half bastard,” What a surprise. So you were dating Todoroki now? It was like a staring competition between you two. A deadly staring competition. Todoroki cleared his throat and adjusted Ryota on his hip.

“Thanks for stopping my son,” Todoroki thanked the pro-hero. But he said it in the most monotone voice ever. No emotion behind it whatsoever.

“Tch,” Bakugou just scoffed and looked away. Todoroki’s son? Nah, that wasn’t right. That was his son. Todoroki took that as a sign of ‘you’re welcome’, and walked away with Ryota in hand. Bakugou just stared off in their direction. Thank god he did because Ryota laid his head on Todoroki’s shoulder, but he was waving at him.

When Ryota was returned to you, you held him in your arms, falling to the ground in tears. You scolded him for running off without telling anyone and to never do it again. But refused to let him go because you were so afraid for his life. You couldn’t let anything happen to him.

All three of you returned to your apartment. After a year of dating, you and Ryota moved in with Shouto in his apartment. You felt bad because his apartment was so big, nice, and fancy but he insisted you both move in. So that Ryota can have a better space to grow up in. If it was for Ryota’s sake, you couldn’t pass up on the offer.

Shouto was putting Ryota to bed while you were finishing up cleaning the dishes. You finished up the last dish and dried your hands when a knock startled you. You looked at the clock. Why would someone be here at this hour? You weren’t expecting anyone. When you opened the door, you were shocked to see Bakugou standing there.

“Bakugou! What are you doing here? How did you know I lived here?” you questioned him, stunned.

“He’s mine, isn’t he?” Bakugou ignored your question with a question of his own. He was staring at the floor. You wanted to deny, deny, deny. But you were too ashamed to say anything. So he tried again. “Ryota.” He said, this time looking up at you. “Ryota is my child, isn’t he?” You bit your lip and nodded your head. You heard him sigh and he ran his fingers through his hair. “You lied to me.”

“What choice did I have?”

“You could have said the truth,” he argued.

“And then what!” you raised your voice, your emotions started to get the better of you. “So you could come running back to be in his life?” your voice cracked at the end from your throat tightening up because you refused to cry. And you tried your hardest not to get too loud, in fear that your boyfriend was going to overhear. But little did you know, Todoroki was leaning against the wall in the hallway, listening to everything.

Bakugou didn’t say a word. Because it was true. He wanted to be in his son’s life. He knows that he fucked up big time. But now, he wanted to right that wrong doing. But you shook your head.

“No. No, I’m sorry Bakugou. That’s not going to happen,” you denied him.

“That’s not fair,” he whispered, his heart breaking once again. He knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but he didn’t know it was going to hurt his bad.

“Not fair?” you let out a soft laugh. Unbelievable. “You want to talk about not fair? You left me. Alone. While I was pregnant. And I had to raise that child all by myself,” you were sobbing now. You were remembering all those hardships that you had to face alone and it was all pouring out. “Do you even know how hard it was? How hard and exhausted I was every single day? And now you want to show up when he’s all grown now? That’s not fair.”

“I know. I know. Fuck, I’m so sorry. I messed up big time. But I want to make it right now. If you let me be in our son’s life, I’ll prove it to you that I can be a good dad. That you can trust me and-and,” Bakugou was so desperate. But you stopped him.

“You were my everything, Bakugou. I was so excited to start this small little family with you. But you destroyed all my hopes and dreams.” Bakugou bit his bottom lip to try to stop himself from crying, but was failing miserably. No matter how hard he tried, the tears wouldn’t stop coming. He violently wiped his teary eyes with the palm of his hand. You gave him a sad smile as you reminisced what you two had together. “I think it’s best if we… if you just forgot about us.” You suggested. Bakugou couldn’t accept that. At least not yet.

“Please, please just think about it?” he begged, his eyes telling all. When you looked at those eyes, you could tell how serious he wanted this.

“Fine,” you said after giving a bit of thought. “I’ll think about it. Go home, it’s late.” You told him. Agreeing with you, he nodded his head and went on his way. You gently closed the door and took a deep breath in. You weren’t expecting this. You guess you were, but not this soon. You turned around to go to you room, quickly wiping your tears away before Shouto could see. But when you looked up, Shouto was already there, arms wide open and eyes looking at you with concern.

“You okay?” he asked as you embraced him in a hug. He kissed the top of your head hugged you close.

“Yeah,” you breathed out, barely managing to say anything. But you weren’t. That night you couldn’t sleep. Your mind was racing with thoughts. This whole situation was bothering you and you couldn’t seem to think of anything else. There was only one way to relax your mind. Sneaking out of your shared bed with your boyfriend, you quickly put on your bathing suit and took a dip in the pool. Did you mention that his apartment came with an outdoor pool right next to the living room? It was convenient when you needed a place to clear your mind. You rested your arms on the edge of the pool, looking out into the city. You let the city lights and the noise of traffic distract you. So much that you didn’t even hear Shouto come up behind you. You squealed when you felt a pair of hands wrap around your waist. He laughed in your ear, slowly kissing the back of your head, making its way down to your neck and then you shoulder.

“Can’t sleep?” his deep, husky voice whispered in your ear.

“No. Did I wake you?” you softly asked back and he shook his head. He held you in silence, both of you looking at the city of lights. Now you were able to relax. His touch was comforting. It was as if his touch put a spell on you to make you relax.

“Hey,” Shouto started.

“Mhm?” you hummed in response. He took a pause.

“Let’s have a kid,” he proposed. You looked up at him and he was already looking down at you with the most loving eyes. It took you off guard, but it was somehow making your heart flutter.

“Us? Like you and me?” you asked, just to make sure you were hearing things right. He nodded his head and cocked his eyebrow.

“Why? Don’t like that idea?” he teased you. Your face flushed red and you waved your hands in front you, then rested on his chest.

“It’s not that! I was just thinking we would…” and you started to trail off. You’ve discussed this topic before but not too much. You were nervous what he was going to say. “…get married first?” You glanced up at your boyfriend and his expression remained unchanged. God, sometimes you couldn’t tell what he was thinking. Finally, a smirk was plastered on his face.

“If you were just a little patient, maybe you wouldn’t have ruined the surprise,” he says which leaves you confused. You saw him take out a frozen block from his trunks. Confusion still prominent on your face, he unfreezes the block to reveal a beautiful velvet box. Shouto froze the box to keep it from getting wet when he was in the water. And when it was time, he would use his other side to unfreeze the box. He opens the box easily with one hand and a gorgeous diamond ring was sitting inside.

“Shouto,” you gasped, admiring the ring. He takes it out the box and slips it on your ring finger.

“Marry me?” he asks. You cup both of his cheeks to bring him into a smothering kiss.

“Yes, yes, yes, yes!” you kept repeating, every time giving him another kiss. You loop your legs around his waist and he traps you in between his body and the edge of the pool. Both of you spend the rest of the night making out and having a bit of fun in the bedroom.

 Bakugou shows up at your apartment the following week while you were eating breakfast. His eyes were puffy and he looked a mess. Your heart goes out to him and felt like you had tortured him enough. After talking to your fiancé about the whole situation, he convinced you to let him in and allow him to step up as the father to your child. But with conditions.

When you answered the door, Bakugou immediately saw the ring on your finger. He swore he didn’t see that before. If he was being honest with himself, seeing that ring on your finger broke his heart a little bit. Seeing you engaged to Todoroki, seeing you happy made him jealous that that wasn’t him. Because he should have been in his place. He should have been the one you were engaged to. He should have been the one you were happy with. He should have been there the entire time. And he wasn’t. For what? Because he was having difficult times in his work? At least he was relieved to hear the news that you were going to give him another chance at raising your son together. He was going to make up for what he missed out on. Todoroki joined you at the door and stuck his hand out for Bakugou to take.

“Welcome to the family.”

[ironmanstan]

Tony Stark is typed (at least on personality database) as an ENTP which I do think is accurate for how he acts in practice and therefore is his actual type, but I think the reason he acts like that is less that it's how he genuinely perceives and interacts with the world but instead the way he's learned Tony Stark should interact with the world, whether he wants to or not.

(Disclaimer: don't listen to me)

I think the two MBTI letters he has that dictate how he processes and reacts to general information, N and P, intuition (reading the deeper meaning, going off what you can interpret and looking for alternate routes) and perceiving (spontaneity, going with the flow and often acting without much order or long term thinking), are both accurate. It makes sense for these to be genuine and true to his actual feelings because these are things that are either internal, or usually only effect him, untouched by the people around him.

His extrovertedness first of all is something that's probably been caused from some outside source. A mix of his childhood lack of attention and him constantly craving it in the present, and needing to be loudest person in the room and talkative as both iron man and Tony Stark. The close friends he does have are few, and time after time he ends up isolating himself to feel truly comfortable or at times so he doesn't feel like he isn't burdening people.

And him being a thinking type instead of feeling, is interesting. It def tracks with how he always forces himself to do what's in theory the logical thing to do rather than what he actually wants to do, feeling like he always has to stand up and do the heavy lifting so nobody else has to do it. Within every logical decision he makes his emotions always end up bleeding through. Tony Stark has a heart no matter how much he pretends he doesn't. his thinking and forcing himself to be logical and solve everything around him could be equal parts his true nature which would make sense with his understanding machines and things that follow formula, things he can solve, as a child. But also could be learned through constantly being in danger. Hypervigilance learned to survive and forcing his emotions down so he isn't punished for daring to feel. Which's, tbh, more chaotic than if he acted on pure emotion. He can switch gears or mix together what he chooses to act on, whether he lets his head or his heart motivate his actions, depending on the situation and how it changes.

Anyway all this to say I think Tony Stark is (outwardly) definitely an ENTP but in his heart of hearts he'd if he'd get some therapy he'd probably be an INFP- *gunshots*

[hqprotectionsquad]

Notice Me (Kenma x Reader)

Title: Notice Me Pairing: Kenma x F!Reader Summary: If you move in with Kenma, you save money and you get to go to your dream school in Tokyo. Just one thing: you start developing a crush on your roommate who you barely know. Word Count: 2441 A/N: This is the original fic I had planned before I lost it for a few bits. I wrote a whole HC set for this, which is very similar because I wrote down everything I could remember. This would be an extension of a sort in that case.

A few months ago, it was never like this. You were just about ready to attend a junior college because your top choice university waitlisted you for your program. You were okay with it, considering the price was significantly less than what you expected to pay at university. What are two years working on transferrable credits anyway? In the grand scheme of things, you were making the right choice.

And then you got off of the waitlist. You jumped for joy and your parents baked you a cake for your achievements. Everything was dandy, up until you remembered the tuition. It wasn’t like you’d be in crippling debt if you attended, just debt that isn’t as crippling.

Luckily, your neighbor, Kenma is also moving to Tokyo, to study something like business or management or something like that? You don’t do much of exploring his personality until you hear a plan that your mom proposes to you.

“Mom, are you serious?” You can’t believe what your ears are hearing.

“Of course! We don’t have much money to send you, let alone boarding. So while you’re in Tokyo, you can stay with Kenma! Kenma will have a large enough apartment, according to his parents when I spoke to them about this.”

“You already spoke to them about it?!”

“Yes! And you both move in two weeks.”

It’s weird, packing up your entire life is weird. Waves of nostalgia crash every time you notice an old toy you used to play with or old photos you forgot existed. Soon enough, you’ve got everything you need in boxes that will meet you in Tokyo.

Tokyo. It still feels like a fever dream. Something that is, but you aren’t sure how it happened. A few months ago, you were days away from enrolling in junior college, and now, you’re going to Tokyo.

Today, your family packs the car with all of your clothing and things that can be easily carried. Later on, you’re in the apartment, settling your items. Soon enough, your family’s back in the emptier car on their way home. Everything goes too quickly.

The process of getting to know Kenma goes too slowly. Sure, you’ve been his neighbor for your entire life, but you’ve never really spoken to him, even though you’ve gone to the same high school and boarded the train together in the mornings.

Now, if you have classes in the morning, you take the train with him to the university. Still, after a few weeks of moving in together, you haven’t spoken much to him. It’s like ebb and flow, except he’s flowing at his own pace.

On the train to classes one day, you ask, “Kenma, do you want to have dinner together? I can pick up something after my last class.”

“No, it’s okay, I’m streaming something tonight.” So that’s all the noise he makes at two in the morning, not that you could assume anything based on the yelling.

“Oh. I didn’t know you streamed. Um, what do you stream?” You don’t want this conversation to stop. From all the years you’ve known him, you were actually jealous of Kuroo for being able to know Kenma so well. This could be your chance to see what’s going on behind that pretty face of his.

“Mostly games.” He digs into his messenger bag and you assume that the conversation is over. This is it, he probably just wants to be roommates without being friends. “You forgot this earlier, by the way. On the counter.” He puts a book into your hand.

“Thank you.” And thus begins your habit of forgetting things and him retrieving them for you. For the most part, it’s not on purpose; you’re just a forgetful human being. However, one time, you checked to see if he’d actually notice if you left something. It was a bit of a gamble, but you just wanted to see. Sure enough, Kenma came right before your class began to hand off a notebook.

These drop-offs are simple, yet his attention to detail is what draws you to him. His perspective means everything when you’re asking him for his opinion on assignments or life events.

You wish there was something more, though. He’s so reserved. It’s not like he’s actively trying to hide something, but maybe, he just wants to be by himself.

That’s such a lonely life.

He has his friend Kuroo, as far as you know, who is a year older than you two. You’re at the extremes of your mind, weighing the pros and cons between your two halves. If you try to befriend Kuroo, that could be your way to knowing Kenma, but Kenma might also be confused by your friendship with his friend. If you don’t try to befriend Kuroo, then you’re essentially stuck in the same place without a stimulant to move forward.

So you do what any college student would do; decide your fate on a coin flip. Heads is get to know Kuroo, and tails is to stay stagnant and find a way through. You flick the coin off of your thumb and it sails into the air until it finds solace in your hand. You slap the coin onto your opposite hand, and what do you know, it lands on—

“Heads.”

Huh. You’re going to have quite a time. You even begin laughing to yourself because you have no idea how to start.

“You know, Kuroo’s a chemistry tutor.” Your friend informs you after she sees your brain unfolding when you go out for a literature study session. She seemed very concerned, but you reassure her that you simply had a crush on your roommate and you aren’t sure how to go about it.

“I’m taking introductory chemistry, and I’m not near failing, Mika.”

“Exactly, it could just be supplemental and you use the studying so you can get a better grade.”

“You know what, I think you’re right. I’m going to do that.” A smile graces your lips and it’s something in between a smirk and a genuine grin, but you’ll take it.

The next time you visit the library, you stop by the corkboard by the entrance. You trace your fingers to find the chemistry tutoring sign-ups and you find Kuroo’s name at the top of a page in bold font. Lines are filled left and right, and you find an opening for two days from now. Now that you’re looking at it, there aren’t too many girls who have signed up for him, just mostly boys. You suppose you’ll find out why soon.

When you approach a table on the day you’ll be tutored, your mouth gapes when you see the face of this guy. How are there more boys who sign up for him than girls? If you weren’t faithful to your mission, you’d probably be reconsidering everything.

“Hey, I’m (Y/N), you’re Kuroo, right? You’re tutoring me in intro chemistry,” you say as you take a seat and unload your notebook and textbook from your backpack. You place your items onto the table, including your trusty highlighters and pencil case.

“Hey.” He offers you a smile. “Glad you could make it.” He does one look over you before asking, “Haven’t we met before? This isn’t an attempt to pick you up, but I mean if you wanted me to, I wouldn’t object.”

You roll your eyes and grin. This guy has no shame from the get-go. “Maybe in passing. I’m Kenma’s roommate.”

“Right, right, that’s where I’ve seen you.” Kuroo nods. “So did you want to get into the parts you have trouble with or do you want to do a brief overview first?”

“Brief overview would be good.” You start to get into all of the general basics of chemistry, like the formulas and diagrams you’ll need for tests. The way Kuroo explains all of this makes so much sense, even the things you thought you knew before.

“Alright! Water break.” It’s been about an hour, but judging by Kuroo’s expression, you might be here a little longer. Even though the world has passed by around you, it feels like you just arrived and introduced yourself.

“Have you considered being a teacher? You’re really good at explaining.”

After chugging down half of his bottle, he runs some fingers through his hair and you’re surprised he can even get them out based on the messy appearance. “I’ve thought about it, but I kind of want to go into forensics or research. Something like that. But something tells me you’re not here because you want to do better on your tests.”

“Red-handed,” you say with your hands up. “What makes you think that though?”

“You’ve kind of got everything down, but I wouldn’t expect anything else from a pretty and smart girl like you.”

Your mouth hangs open just the slightest bit and you have to force yourself to press your lips into a smile. You try to look anywhere else except meet his eyes. “I,” you stop to breathe. “I’m flattered, but um, I guess I did come here with a different intention than just studying.”

“And that would be?” Kuroo clasps his hands together and leans forward. By the looks of it, he’s even tilting his head so his ear faces towards you.

Your breath can’t make a silver barrier between Kuroo and your flushed cheeks. “I, um, kind of have developed a crush on Kenma, and since you’re his friend—”

“Damn. I really thought I could get a girl from tutoring, but it looks like she’s only interested in my best friend.” He then does this thing where it looks like he’s smirking and fake crying at the same time and you can’t really tell what he’s trying to accomplish from this. Still, he bites his lip and you’re led to believe he’s actually a little upset that he’s being passed over.

“I’m sorry, Kuroo.”

“Why are you sorry?” He laughs through his question.

“I don’t know.” With your smile on your face, you peer down at your chemistry notes, the ones you’ve just written. “I’m really thankful for all your help with this. I’m sorry if it seems like I’ve taken advantage of you.”

“Believe me, it’s no big deal. You’re one of the first girls I’ve tutored and you’re pretty cool. I still don’t know why I keep getting guys to tutor, don’t know what witch cursed me with that.” Kuroo clicks his tongue before continuing, “But you’re his roommate. Shouldn’t you at least know him up to a certain extent? I just don’t get it when you could just try to seduce him.” He pauses. “Don’t actually do that, it probably won’t work, it’s Kenma.”

“Exactly. He’s been my neighbor for basically all of my life, but I don’t know him enough to try to start something. I can’t tell if he enjoys my company or not.”

“You know what, I know you’re Kenma’s roommate and you barely know him, which is understandable, because it’s Kenma. Come check out the intramural games and you’ll get to meet the team.”

You tilt your head at his statement. “Intramural games? For what?”

“For volleyball. Kenma’s the setter, I’m the captain for our team.” Kuroo nods. “Saturday at 4. I’ll invite you out for ice cream and it’ll be all cool.” He starts packing up his stuff and shoving it into his backpack.

“Alright, I’ll see you then,” you confirm while you mirror his actions. You bid him goodbye and the last thing you hear from him is mumbling that you had to, of course, like his best friend.

Saturday comes and you wish you could say it wasn’t a blur, but with all of the volleyball lingo—still unsure what some of the positions are, but at least you know Kenma’s—and the men just talking amongst themselves, it’s not hard to get stuck in the whirlwind.

“Are you okay, (Y/N)?”

You give your head a little shake before looking to see who was speaking to you. “Yeah, I’m okay. Thanks for asking, Kenma.”

“If you don’t want to be here, I can take us back to the apartment. I’m sure Lev’s loud voice is hurting your ears.” He casts a strained glance to the man leaning back on the counter, slurping his ice cream like it’s a soup. The rest of the lot is in the circle, speaking to teammates, and whoever happened to respond to Kuroo’s invitation. Turns out you weren’t the only one that wanted to share in the company of the team.

With your unfinished ice cream cup still in your hand, you bid goodbye to Kuroo and the other team members. Turns out there really is a whole world outside of your small circle at the university. Without them, you wouldn’t have realized how interesting life could be if you continued to hang out with them all.

You wondered if you kept this up, maybe you’d have a chance with Kenma, and so you did. They were all kind enough to allow you to tag onto their plans, even if you’ve stuck onto them like unwanted glue residue. They never grumbled when you walked into cafes with Kuroo, nor did they whisper underneath their breath when you joined them for movie nights at Tora’s apartment. If you didn’t know any better, you’d say you were becoming very good friends with all of them, including your roommate.

Nowadays, he’ll subtly expect to have dinner together when you are both free and you’ll commute to school with him on the days that your classes start around the same time. All the while, you’re still trying to talk to him. Ask him about the weather, what can he recommend as far as video games go — anything that will get him to move his mouth. He really enjoys talking about the games he plays and it seems like that’s his life. Behind his nonchalant expression, fiery eyes dance.

One day on the train, he sits next to you. Everything takes you back to earlier in the year when you barely knew him. All it took was volleyball and the intervention of a very important person in Kenma’s life. He’s no longer just a roommate. He’s a friend, someone to talk to, someone who listens to you.

He turns his head and looks you up and down, from your eyes to your shoes. His gaze is sure but slow, and you aren’t certain of his intentions.

Finally, he asks, “(Y/N), are you flirting with me?”

Hearing this come from his lips tugs your own into a smile. “You finally noticed?”

navi! | master list | tag list form

[todonintendos]

The Genius Behind The Genius

It’s been already eight years since Pokémon Black and White were released for the Nintendo DS. Time sure flies. I think we can all agree that it seems like yesterday. This just comes to prove how big the mark these games have left is, not to mention the amazing sequels we got to play. One of the many reasons why it’s hard to forget these games is their story. In fact, it took over a year to write, and seeing the result, it was definitely worth the time spent.

But what makes up a good story? A decent amount of plot twists and an interesting theme to talk about are good answers, but this time we’ll be focusing in characters. There’s no good story without characters, and turns out Pokémon Black and White has plenty of them. Cheren, Ghetsis, Bianca, Iris, Juniper... the list feels endless. Each of them have their own unique origins, story and behavior... and then there’s N.

N is an anti-villain, since he’s the king of the villainous Team Plasma, but sees Pokémon as his friends and acts nicely towards the player.

When N was very young, he was abandoned in the woods, where he was raised by the Pokémon living there. One day, Ghetsis began taking care of him, claiming to be his father. Actually, it’s still a mystery who N parents are, to the point where Junichi Masuda, the current director of the Pokémon games, even suggested he could have been born from Pokémon. When the player meets N for the first time, N is already over eighteen years old. My guess is that he’s 19, but I’ll go deeper into that theory later.

Despite not having received proper education, his IQ is stated to be extremely high. His mind exceeds any other human mind from the Pokémon world. Junichi Masuda revealed that he can look into people’s past and future. But his most recognized talent is probably his skill with mathematics. He’s a mathematical genius. It’s said that he sees everything in a black and white fashion, and uses mathematical formulas as a way to make sense of it, since being raised by Pokémon prevented him from having our generic vision of the world. This is the exact same reason why he proves to have a closer relationship with Pokémon than humans.

Being a mastermind who was raised by Pokémon, N considers himself a personification of perfection.

Little more needs to be known about N to realize how distinct of a character he is. Nonetheless, N is still a fictional character, and as with any other work of fiction, there’s a real human mind behind it. The creator of the creation and, for N’s case, the genius behind the genius.

That person is, as you may have guessed already, Junichi Masuda himself. The director and lead composer of Pokémon Black and White and their respective sequels. It’s evident that a good character is never born out of nowhere. There’s always a source of inspiration behind it, and maths were definitely the strongest influence around his creation. At plain sight, the references may not seem obvious. But the same way N has a completely different point of view of what we see, we also need to change our perception of N to see them and figure them out.

Junichi Masuda next to Shigeru Ohmori, game designers and directors of many Pokémon games. Both worked on Black and White together.

By simply looking at N’s official artwork from Black and White, the only thing that’s worth talking about is the cube hanging from his belt. Since it doesn’t have any colors other than a dark shade of yellow, it can’t be a Void Cube, a variant of the well-known Rubik’s Cube with a hole in the middle of every face. Instead, we could be talking about the second iteration of a Menger Sponge, but try to remember what I just mentioned about Void Cubes.

Understanding what a Menger Sponge is can be relatively easy. It gets more complex when we try to approach it from a mathematical point of view. First, think of a big cube of infinite dimensions, which turns out to be the first step of the Menger Sequence. Now, split that big cube into 27 smaller cubes of the same dimensions, and remove the cube that’s in the middle of every face and in the very center of the cube. The shape that the 20 remaining cubes form should remind you of the Void Cube I mentioned earlier, and the cube hanging from N’s belt, of course. Now follow the same steps for those 20 cubes, and repeat the process infinitely. 

The result is a cube with infinite surface, but zero volume, as it will have an infinite amount of holes. Two different and equally valid points of view for the same concept.

One does not realize how the cube will eventually end up having infinite holes until it’s looked from a mathematical point of view.

The truth is, this cube doesn’t take any major, or even minor role in the story of the games, but early concept artworks and notes suggest that it was initially going to be relevant to the plot of the game. However, if N still wears it in the final games, there has to be a reason for that, and it’s probably because of the fact that no-one will find anything interesting in that cube unless it’s seen from a mathematical point of view, or N’s default point of view.

Moving away from his appearance, one of the things that gets the attention of most people is how he’s named after a single letter: the letter N, which happens to be the letter that’s used to represent the set of all natural numbers, which are all numbers without any decimals starting from zero (zero is not part of that set). In fact, this isn’t just a coincidence, as Junichi Masuda has revealed that N stands for Natural Number. However, if you’ve played through Black and White, you should know that N isn’t his actual name. His full name in every language is Natural Harmonia Gropius. And yes, there’s a mathematical context behind it. Actually, not all of the context has to do with math.

The natural set (N) is the most basic mathematical set, and is contained inside all of the bigger sets (real numbers, rational numbers...)

The first part of his full name, Natural, should be already figured out, and there isn’t much more to explain. However, the next part, his surname Harmonia, can be a little bit harder to understand, so let’s focus first on the last name, Gropius, since it’s not confirmed to have a specific origin. Gropius is a rather popular last name in Germany, and is often associated with Walter Gropius, pioneer of modernistic architecture during the XXth century. This could reference the fact that N wants to build a world where Pokémon and humans can live together in... well, harmony. Though it’s debatable whether this is true or not.

Regarding Harmonia, at first glance, it may seem like it refers to the musical term harmony: combinations of chords that create a pleasant melody. While that point of view is correct, the mathematical point of view we’re focusing on leads us to harmonic functions. I won’t go into detail on what they are because it requires a rather wide knowledge on maths to understand. In fact, we don’t really have to, as this only will help us realize there has to be a relation between music and maths somewhere in N’s development history, and by analyzing the well-known N Battle Theme, we’ll find out how math also influenced this tune.

Harmonic functions are those who have a first and a second derivative that always satisfy Laplace’s equation (df^2/dx(n)^2=0)

The genius we’ve been talking about all this time, Junichi Masuda, was in charge of composing this very specific theme, and states in a post from his personal blog that he was influenced by prime numbers to compose it. But why prime numbers? Masuda defends this idea by considering N as the “one” genius, and implying that prime numbers are the ones who get closer to being as unique as number one, due to the fact that they only have two divisors.

I’ve tried finding a music sheet of N’s Battle Theme so following the song becomes easier, however, I found nothing, which surprises me considering it’s a very popular theme. However, since all of this info comes from Junichi Masuda himself, we can definitely trust on it. As a replacement, here’s a video with the song so you can try to follow along, specially if you’ve got a good musical ear.

Right at the first part of the song, you can hear several combinations of eight ascending notes. Imagine the lowest note of the eight, which is always the first one of each set, is note #1, and that the number associated to every note increases by one whenever the key of the note also increases by one position. Do this in all of the sets, and you should get the following number combination: (1, 2, 3, 5, 7, 11, 13, 17, 19), which happens to be number one followed by the first seven prime numbers... with seven itself also being a prime number. Also, note that following the definition of prime number, 1 is NOT one of them.

After this intro, several sequences of three notes, with the last note playing for way longer than the other two, can be heard. The fact that it’s three notes isn’t a coincidence since three is a prime number. In music terms, a bar is the segment of time that corresponds to a specific amount of beats stated at the beginning of the music sheet, which is usually four, and the longest note of the three extends for five bars... with five also being a prime number. But this doesn’t end here. This whole theme extends for 83 bars before it begins to loop... and guess what? 83 is also a prime number!

All prime numbers from 1 to 100 appear green on this chart. 1 isn’t a prime number.

We can also find some relations between N and prime numbers on the character itself and not just on his battle theme. For example, in the game, he’s said to be 5′ 11′’ tall. At this point I don’t think I should remind that 5 and 11 are prime numbers, but I’ll do just in case. His trainer ID number in Pokémon Black and White is 00002 (two is the only even prime number). And he’s also the only trainer in Generation V that uses all 17 types of Pokémon at least once during the game. And yes, 17 is also a prime number. Though this info I just mentioned isn’t confirmed, and could be just a coincidence.

Also, there’s much more in N’s Battle Theme other than all of the influence from prime numbers. The clocks ticking in the middle of the song, the sudden bursts of energy... all of these elements aren’t random, and Junichi Masuda explains all of them on his personal blog, so definitely check it out if you’re interested in knowing more about it! https://www.gamefreak.co.jp/blog/dir_english/?m=201110

...and you reached the end of the article!

As you saw, the creativity put into the creation of N is simply insane. People often tend to ignore the development stories of their favourite characters no matter how much they love them, but if you attempt to do a small research to find out, you may end up finding something as surprising as this. Authors and developers care about their characters, to the point where they end up putting all of this effort to make it stand out. Thanks for reading!

~TodoNintendoS, as part of Daily Nintendo Fact #100

[wannawrite]

All For One

who?: Wanna One’s Lai Guanlin, Cube Ent’s / Pd101’s Yoo Seonho genre: 🌸 type: bullet point blog navigator. • you have two Cube Chicks for best friends • is this a good or bad idea? this...is the cutest, softest thing...possibly...ever. I’ll try my best! Made me think of my best friends a lot  :”) TYSM @isaluciavevo for requesting - Admin L

• ahhhh the Cube Chicks are back together again • honestly,,,who...just who in the right mind thought that this would be a good idea • because it is a GREAT idea • but • warning: Cube Chicks may cause trouble out of good intention • good vibes only • that’s how y’all roll • if you want it • you go get it • and your boys will support you • both are competitive sportsmen • basketball team!! • captain • and vice-captain • it’s a v v messy yet memorable friendship • sometimes it’s you trying to keep Seonho and Guanlin alive • sometimes it’s Guanlin trying to keep you and Seonho from getting arrested • yeah • it’s Seonho for everything • have you seen this boy? • he gets in so much trouble its a miracle you haven’t bailed him out of jail yet • but he’s a good boy, don’t worry • he’s just clumsy and childish • kind of doesn’t think of consequences before acting • sort of plunges both feet into hot water without dipping his toes to check first • but • that’s how your entire friendship functions • it’s a good friendship • you share a class with Seonho • and it’s crazy • he sits next to you • some days he never pays attention to the teacher and gossips to you throughout class • other days he’s like • ‘hey seonho can I borrow a pencil-’  • ‘shush. pay attention to the teacher, y/n.’ • damn Seonho I just wanted a pencil I didn’t ask for this slander • but you love him • in school, he’s the first person to greet you at your locker in the mornings • with a bright smile, his backpack slung over his shoulder • then he ruffles your hair playfully, messing it up completely • true friendship :”) • ‘ahh, I know that person you like will definitely take notice of you now,’ he teases • then you guys walk to assembly and class together • sometimes in class, you guys have a sheet of foolscap paper in between the desks • and either one of you will draw or write some really cute, heart-warming, heart-fluttering bullshit • okay you get my drift • ‘you’re doing amazing sweetie’ • ‘cheer up!’ • ‘have fun at basketball practice later!’ • ‘i miss Guanlin :(‘ • ‘>:( what about me’ • ‘I love Guanlin :D’   • ‘ :”( ‘ • ‘ily2 dw ❤️’ • Seonho smiles before folding up the paper and sticking it into his bag just as your teacher walks by • he has an incredible knack of never getting in trouble • he can create trouble but he doesn’t get in it • explain later • okay now • Seonho is also super concern and caring • during lunch if he gets pizza, he makes sure to buy some for you too • and Guanlin of course • ‘pfpp lol hyung you can buy your own’ • ‘yah, you still owe me from last week’s frozen yoghurt.’ • bickers over food • visits your house very often • he just comes to nap on your bed • ‘nooo I’m here to inspect if you cleaned your room like you said you did in your Snapchat story.’ • really, he just wants access to your pantry and kitchen • while eating popcorn, you and Guanlin doodle things all over his arms when he’s sleeping • not dicks pls • Seonho is a child • he needs his sleep • after sleeping, he makes sure to go out with you and Guanlin a lot • barbecue is a MUST • in fact, the owner is a classmate’s parent • and always give you guys a discount • THAT’S how regular y’all are • and there’s always a tad bit more food for your table • karaoke is a favourite • time for swaggy rapper™️ to shine • speaking of Guanlin • he’s a year older • yet not that much more mature • or sensible • jk, he is • quieter and shyer than Seonho • but just as goofy when he opens up to you • is fake deep • ‘I want to get a tattoo of a burrito because we get so wrapped up in our internal feelings and sadness, that we ignore the crisp and goodness outside.’ • sends really meaningful things to the group chat at 12am • Guanlin🐥: you guys mean the world to me, I would never trade y’all for anything else • Seonho🐣: aww hyung :”) • you: 💓💓💓 • changes the group chat profile pic very often • he went through an entire streak of Kermit the frog for a month • Guanlin really likes memes • more than Seonho • and Seonho has a folder of 500+ pictures of memes alone • at 3.30am, Guanlin will send memes to the group chat • kermit the frog memes • pepe memes   • any other meme you can think of • sometimes recycles memes • edits memes • Guanlin🐥: hey Daniel hyung promised me a lifetime worth of pizza if I gave  Seonho to Minhyun hyung • Guanlin🐥: so lmao bye bye Seonho • Guanlin🐥: you’re the sacrifice • Seonho actually disappears for a couple of hours   • wh00ps • but Guanlin is EXTRA • extra sweet ;) • advises you both of life • ‘now...my young grasshoppers, I’m going to teach you how to sleep in class and not get caught.’ • ‘this is how you secretly eat pizza rolls in the middle of math’ • ‘LiSTEN, this is how you sneak in a waffle maker to make breakfast in morning assembly’ • but he does actually help • he helps both of you with studies • pushes Seonho to study by treating him to pizza • and ice cream • and chicken • Guanlin tells you tips and tricks to memorise math formulas better • uses creative analogies • ‘okay, imagine that x is a sheep. So 2x would mean 2 sheep and then 4x + -3x would be?’ • I don’t even know actually but let’s just pretend I do • ‘guys, if you get Mr Kai as your math teacher next year, tell me.’ • is a nice, responsible and caring older brother • gets really protective from time to time • it’s the small actions that give him away • like • ‘no, I’ll walk you out to the gate, don’t go by yourself.’ • ‘text me when you get home safe, okay?’ • will walk you to the bus stop and take your bus even if it goes the opposite way • makes some lame excuse • ‘uhh, my sister’s friend’s dog is in the area so I’m going to meet him and we’ll go back together.’ • ‘I need to pick up dry cleaning for my mother. You know how she’s fussy about her evening gowns.’ • ‘Lin, it’s 9pm at night...the shop is closed.’ • red-faced • ‘oh’ • Guanlin is #1 on speed dial on both your phones • ‘in cases y’all get drunk, call me, no one else knows how to take care of you two.’ • Seonho always texts him when he’s arrived safely at home • with a cute selfie sometimes • Guanlin tracks both the children’s sleep schedules in his diary watch him • is generous • pays for your haircuts • *pushes both of you into the salon Jinyoung works at* • ‘since school is almost over, you guys need a look for summer.’ • ‘hey Jinyoung, these are my friends so take good care of them wink wonk’ • ;) • I got you • Taiwanese chick is slyer than a fox • Seonho sits in the salon chair with pitch black hair • and emerges with a blonde streak down the middle • you don’t sense anything wrong • until Baejin starts to whip out green hair dye • ‘WAIT’ • you wrestle Jinyoung for that box • ‘HOW MUCH DID GUAN PAY YOU? I CAN PAY YOU MORE!’ • Guanlin’s hair ends up being blondish green • well done • he also once convinced Jinyoung to chop off a good 4 inches of your hair • I could use some 4 inches in height • hah • speaking of height • Guanlin is tall • so is Seonho • and Guanlin is just a bit more of that annoying tall friend who makes fun of everyone who isn’t as tall as them • yes thank you for putting MY box of cookies on the top shelf of my pantry • aww Seonho you sweetheart, thanks for helping   • he smirks and takes the whole box for himself • sigh • tall people • if you hang out in the evenings • Guanlin always drags Seonho’s ass out of your house to the basketball courts nearby • to practice • you know • time to grind😤😫 • you tag along • trying to win against a basketball team captain and vice-captain • some die heroes • ‘WatCH ME’ • your best friends just chuckle and shrug • but they are also your support squad • ‘jUst JUMP YOU GOT THIS!’ Guanlin yells enthusiastically • once, he even bought a loudspeaker • ‘LET’S GO TEAM!’ • and it got taken away by a park warden • then he brought another one • and a policeman on patrol swiped it • so Guanlin relied on his swaggy rapper™️ voice • Seonho becomes the spectator • ‘AND-AND WILL Y/N SCORE FOR THE FIRST TIME?’ • this is how you guys spend the weekends • ‘...THEY DO. A MIRACLE HAS HAPPENED.’ • Guanlin runs and catches you in a hug, overjoyed • Seonho joins soon after • and the three of you collapse in the cold court floor, bursting into laughter • but your heart couldn’t feel any warmer :”) • ‘ahhh, I could spend all night here.’ • but of course, realistically, you can’t • so all of you retire to Guanlin’s mansion • I make him a rich boy in every single one of my works I realised I’m sorry • sometimes it becomes a sleepover • like pillow fights   • making s’mores • scaring the hell out of his chef in the process • ‘dAMNIT GUANLIN YOUR PARENTS WILL KILL ME IF YOU BURN THE BOTTOM OF THIS POT.’ • ‘they’ll fire you if you swear at me, right?’ he says cockily, raising an amused brow • his chef just huffs. ‘I’ve known you since you ran around in diapers, goodness.’ • ahhh • his chef is gracious nonetheless and brings you guys platters of snacks for your movie night • includes a lot of yelling • Seonho getting spooked easily • Guanlin taking time to calculate if the scenario could happen in real life then reacting • the kind of best friends to watch Netflix with you until 12am • ‘c’mon,’ Seonho whispers. ‘Everyone should be asleep by now.’ • the three of you creep up to Guanlin’s spacious rooftop garden • star-gazing time • you pop open the soda bottles and get bags of chips • sipping cola • looking at the stars • back on the ground, head to head to form a circle • ahhh • ‘oh! shooting star!’ • ‘hey, that constellation looks like a horse!’ • it’s just a good time filled with laughter, jokes, food and friendship • as the night wears on, things get really deep and personal • these hangouts have sort of become personal therapy sessions for you • whatever you want to say • say it • all of you trust each other with your lives • a lot of things get lifted off each other’s chest • figure out problems together • help each other out • just a genuine, meaningful time of bonding • when it ends, you feel more secure and loyal to your friends • you and Seonho take the enormous couch in the gaming room while Guanlin sleeps in his bed a few doors down • he makes sure to tuck both of you in • and talk until one of you falls asleep before he tucks himself in • such a pure and real friendship • supportive • loving • loyal • and caring • during Christmas time, you guys team up to bake cookies and other holiday treats • it obviously isn’t the greatest idea • I mean, have you seen Guan and Seonho’s ‘It’s meringue time!’? yeah • seonho insists on icing his own cookies this year • he later spent almost an hour scraping icing off the ceiling of his kitchen • taking turns to help decorate each other’s houses • gift shopping for the rest of your clique together • synonymously agreeing to buy yet another fly swatter for Daniel • maybe some shoe insoles for Sungwoon • savages 24/7 • puns all around • breathe memes • especially Guanlin • like that boy has a basketball jersey with Kermit on the back • he actually wears it out • gave an identical one to Seonho for his birthday • and you received one as well for Christmas • from your Secret Santa • at basketball matches • it’s a given you’re there to support them, rain or shine • so if your crush wants to see you, they attend the game • a night before, you’re spamming the group chat with encouraging messages and gifs • they’re like ‘pffp we don’t need these’ but it actually cheers them up • HEART MELTING • there’s always a small spat in the group chat on whose jersey/jacket you will wear • Guanlin🐥: hEY I’M OLDER THAN YOU. • Guanlin🐥: THEY CAN WEAR YOURS ANY OTHER TIME, THIS IS ONE OF MY LAST COMPETITIONS 

• Seonho🐣: I FRICKIN WASHED AND DRY CLEANED MY JERSEY FOR THIS i’msorryimessedup

• on the day itself, you’re clad in Seonho’s practice jersey and Guanlin’s jacket • the cutest • everyone assumes y’all daring • but all of you are just the closest of friends • friendship goals • plus, they’re the best wingmen • just a super supportive, real, joyous friendship

[douchebagbrainwaves]

SUBTRACT ONE FROM THE OTHER, AND THE RESULT IS WHAT WE CAN'T SAY: TO LOOK AT THINGS PEOPLE DO SAY, AND GET NOTHING IF IT FAILS

This was exactly the kind of people who might have corrected them, they tended to be self-perpetuating. Yuppies were young professionals who made lots of money? Not everyone who gets rich now does it by creating wealth, the default language, embodied in a succession of popular languages, has gradually evolved toward Lisp. If there is an overlap, can we use one field's discoveries about beauty to help us in another? He wanted to spend his time thinking about biology, not arguing with people who accused him of being an atheist. You feel this when you start to examine the question, it's surprising how much different fields' ideas of beauty have in common. N i To be fair, Perl also retains this distinction, but deals with it in typical Perl fashion by letting you omit returns. You can go anywhere. Fortran I didn't have them. But in their time, they had real force. I wonder if these patterns are not sometimes evidence of case c, the human compiler, at work. It may look Victorian, but a fickle client or unreliable materials would not be a bad definition of math to call it the study of terms that have precise meanings.

The companies that make it through the selection process was biased against some type of applicant? The less it costs to start a startup explicitly to get rich if the product succeeds, and get nothing if it fails. But the smarter ones restrain themselves, if they tried, start successful startups, if they can improve your average outcome by more than 6. Why climb a corporate ladder that might be perceived as disparaging towards homosexuals. Founders at Work. Giotto saw traditional Byzantine madonnas painted according to a formula. I've heard the founders didn't seem like us. There's an idea that contradicts the assumption you started with. At the time it was a weapon, used by Ludendorff in a purge of those who favored a negotiated peace.

They just want to get really big need the sort of people who do that tend not to have much power in big companies. I'm not sure how much credit to give him. And if you feel you have to be dragged kicking and screaming toward, it may inhibit you from thinking about taste, even as yours grows. Much to their surprise, they didn't arrive at answers at all. And ambitious projects are by definition close to the limits of your capacity. So what was this mysterious work experience and why did I need it? I thought of it in these terms, but in fact I found it boring and incomprehensible. To be fair, Perl also retains this distinction, but deals with it in typical Perl fashion by letting you omit returns. It seems strange to have to buy for hundreds of millions to acquire. Why not go work for an existing company for a couple years, a good recipe for startups will be to look around you for things that people haven't realized yet can be made unnecessary by a tablet app. VCs who invest in them.

What happened? I was using it. Better still, answer I haven't decided. I remember thinking Ah, so this is what Bill Gates must have been when they first started to. They can't pay as much attention to you as a VC on your board. 06 and 1/1-n to see if it makes sense. This is particularly valuable for undergrads, because the younger you are, the more leverage you get from work experience is an understanding of what work is, and make sure you solve that. The power of this technique extends beyond startups and programming languages have almost caught up with 1958.

People could have been publishing online in 1995, and yet blogging has only really taken off in the last couple years. All the best things that I did at Apple came from a not having money and b not having done it before, ever. For example, in the sense we mean today. You can see that in the way math or history or most other university subjects do. Any company that hires you is, economically, acting as a proxy for the customer. So to the extent that winning is a matter of pride, and a dial to control each. Want to get hired by Yahoo?

We take these for granted now, but every night tens of millions of families would sit down together in front of a VT100 connected to a single central Vax. The expected value of a startup that has another founder who worked at Amazon—even if you think of one day starting a startup has decreased dramatically. The ones who are uncertain believe it and give up, and the ones who give employers the money to pay you. If you win the users, everything else will follow. Since most powerful people in the future. It also gives them more power relative to investors. Hardy's boast that number theory had no use whatsoever wouldn't disqualify it. They were professionals working in fields like law, finance, and consulting.

It may also be because if you do add that final increment of power, you can prove what you're saying, or at least lacked some concepts that would have made in an ordinary job. Go find some users and see what you get. If, like other investors, we run on the server. Second, I do it because we were smart. Checkers and solitaire have been replaced by World of Warcraft and FarmVille. But I do at least know now why I didn't. They delayed for an entire year, and when they did finally take a CEO, they chose a guy with a PhD in computer science. It would be insane to go to the meeting. The only reason we even consider calling them mobile devices is that the spinal cord has the situation under control. In the best case, it might not just be preparation for a startup is the percentage chance it's Google. I because you could not nest statements. Indeed, in some respects the war didn't end in 1945; the enemy just switched to the Soviet Union.

[amethystblack]

Hey I know the majority of Reborn's characters are based off PO's league, but what about the purely fictional characters? How did you come up with them? Tell me your creative thought process behind making your oc's n stuff ^-^ ((I'm super interested in writing))

so, i definitely have some ideas on character creation i can share, but as a prelude most of this is not going to apply to reborn because "the purely fictional characters" that i'm responsible for in reborn are limited pretty much just to the NPCs which i make up on the spot. also, my preference for writing is to focus on the development of the protagonist, which means when we have a silent protagonist like in reborn everything i know and care about goes out the window. so, i will talk a bit about this here, but please understand that it basically has nothing to do with reborn.

i'll begin below the cut.

for the sake of example, i will walk through the process of creating a throwaway character here. as i said, i choose to centralize the protagonist's development. therefore, we must first understand what that character's internal struggle is and how they will overcome it. i consider this conflict core to the character, like a backbone.

when beginning something like this, i look for some kind of conflict within myself. characters must explore conflict, and writing is strongest when it makes the writer vulnerable and has their genuine heart in it. therefore, we must pull from our own experiences and challenges. for our example here, i'll choose something i've been struggling with lately, which is the feeling that as a person i am somehow inherently harmful or destructive to those around me and that it might be better to disappear altogether.if you feel like this has suddenly gotten entirely too real, then that suggests to me that this is an effective conflict to explore. 

next, we must decide the answer that character comes to. the contrast should be apparent, and it should relieve the character's emotional discomfort with the conflict. for the sake of contrast, i will first consider the direct opposite of the mentality causing the conflict. what is the opposite of thinking one should disappear because they harm others? let us say it is deciding to refuse to leave or regardless of how it affects others.

therefore the character's development at the most basic level is this: a person who would rather disappear than hurt others decides that they won't die no matter who it hurts. this is the character's outline, and  will serve as a guide for everything else.

so we have the what. now we must understand how.i will ask, what event is going to force that character to change? in our example, what can possibly make a person so afraid to hurt others decide suddenly able to accept doing so? they have to understand how their former choice was wrong. taking situations to their extremes tends to be the most effective here. so how can that flaw be harmful to our character? well, if they would rather disappear than hurt someone, maybe they choose to give up something core to themselves for the sake of not hurting someone else. how can we take that further? perhaps that someone else chooses to take more than what was given up-- and the character allows it, not wanting to hurt them. suppose that the situation escalates to the point that the protagonist would have to give up their freedom, body, or life as well. this doesn't work very well, because if they think they should disappear anyway, they might do that freely. instead, what if it also cost the lives of the people around our character instead? would they still refuse to hurt anyone? perhaps that becomes the breaking point.therefore we arrive at an understanding of both the character and the story: the character's flaw creates a scenario that only making a different choice can solve. in order to save the people our protagonist cares about, they must overcome that flaw.

now, we suddenly understand a lot more about our character and their environment:

there are people in their day to day lives they must care about

there are people they wish to protect that do not respect their or their friends' safety in return

there must be something that they loved to do that could harm others, that they then chose to give up

there must be someone affected by that action in the first place that they would have decied to give it up

there is also somewhat of a formula we can expand to in this case:the protagonist must use their strength to overcome their flaw and achieve their goal. in our example so far we understand their flaw, we understand how they overcome it, and we understand that they -had- a strength in what they loved to do and gave up.we are missing a goal. what does the character hope to achieve at the start of the story? well, we should understand that their fear of hurting others has kept them from achieving this goal. therefore, whatever it is probably involves other people. for now, we can presume their goal is something to do with companionship. in order to become close with others, they must use their strength to overcome their fear of not hurting anyone.

now that we have a good understanding of our protagonist, we can also begin to understand what roles we need other characters in the story to play. right now we know we need two parties: someone they must protect and someone they must protect from. further, if they are seeking some kind of companionship, we can understand that the someone they must protect should not qualify, or else why would it not already apply? perhaps it is a family member, for instance, and the type of companionship they seek is romantic. we make decisions here in a logical way that continues to fit the pieces together.this is somewhat effective too as it creates more conflict between the person she protects and the person she protects from, if that latter person is both harmful and romantically desirable. we now know we have the protagonist, the family member, and the destructive love interest. the story has unfolded strictly from the needs of the protagonists development. this keeps it effective and on track.

now that we have a clearer goal (romantic companionship) we should clarify what the protagonist's strength is. what we know about it so far is that:

it is something that they loved to do, 

something that they choose to give up, 

something that can protect others,  

something that can hurt others, 

and something that could win them a love interest. 

the most obvious thing for the aspects of hurt and protect might be fighting, but that feels strange to me given the choice to give it up. save for some kind of sport, fighters often do it to survive, not by choice. and how does fighting for sport win a love interest?

instead, i have thought of a different scenario for our example... let us suppose that the thing they love to do, is singing. and let us suppose our character is a siren. as we know, sirens are mythical creatures infamous for their entrancing songs luring sailors to death on the cliffs below their island. what if our protagonist is a siren who chooses to give up singing to spare the lives of those sailors?

we can now fill in a lot of blanks here:

our outline is now: a siren must overcome her fear of hurting others with her song in order to find romance

we suddenly understand the periocity of our story: it must taken place in the age of ancient greek mythology, and likely focuses on the siren's island.

the family member she must protect is one of her siren sister-- or multiple. her sisters probably do not share her pity for their human victims otherwise the story could just as well be about them, but they still must have a close relationship despite that for our protagonist to care so much about saving them.

how must her sisters feel about her not singing? if it hasn't impacted their relationship perhaps the protagonist has taken on the strain of lying to them about why she does not sing. this might be consistent behavior for someone who wants to cause no trouble for others. perhaps she feigned losing her voice and her sisters have sung for her since. this creates closeness with discomfort, as she still cannot condone their actions, but dares not say anything lest she hurt them.

there was probably a specific incident after which the protagonist gave up singing. again, we should push it to extremes-- perhaps as a young siren not fully understanding her power, she happened to gaze upon a passing vessel and became rather attacked to the sailors there after watching them for a while. suddenly filled with love and curiosity for the outside world, she was inspired to sing for them, and subsequently horrified as she could only watch each and every sailor crash onto the rocks below her and die in horrible ways. she resolved never to sing again after that.

if she continued to crave romance after that she must have continued to think fondly of the humans she observed back then. maybe one in particular had caught her eye. it would be effective to make the love interest resemble him.

the destructive love interest is likely a human who comes into contact with them as a result of -not- dying to her song. he survives to board the island and meet her. perhaps he doesn't fully respect the sirens as companions worth having, and seeks to capture and/or harm them instead.

what is the scenario in which she has to protect her sisters? perhaps the human captures them and takes them all to the mainland where they would be executed. the protagonist must be an exception here for some reason. perhaps her sisters are gagged so they cannot sing, while she is not since she refused to on her own. when her sisters should be executed, the protagonist finally decides to risk singing in order to save them. 

the idea of pursuing a romantic interest doesn't work so well at that point because it makes no sense to continue to pursue someone who tried to execute one's sisters, so perhaps there are two different human characters-- the love interest, who resembles the sailor she fancied and watched die before, and the captain above that love interest who takes the sisters to be executed. perhaps it is the love interest that the convinces the captain to spare the apparently-mute protagonist from being gagged. perhaps she even goes so far as to kill the captain and have the love interest take over instead.

since she will have outted that she did not lose her voice afterwards, she will have to reconcile with her sisters. this can be the moment we see her decision stabilize, where she decides to be honest with them despite their expectations. because she saved them, they will forgive her. and for the love interest, no longer having to pretend she has no voice, she may actually speak with and begin a real trusting relationship with him-- despite the power her voice carries. if he also becomes the captain then he can see her whenever he wants. thereby, she achieves her goal with her strength, despite her flaw.

...so, this has been a lot of text for very little purpose but i hope you can see the points here. there are basic formulas which i follow and a few principles to make it effective, but in this way the entire story has more or less written itself just from the starting concept, those guidelines, and putting the pieces together with what fits and makes sense. the beauty of this method is that every single piece of the story then perfectly fits into the place it needs to be to help show the protagonist's development, making it a thorough but focused exploration of that initial conflict.

it is also worth clarifying that this is for the purposes of something like a short story-- in a larger context such as a game or novel, there may be multiple protagonists, or subplots that must come to fruition before the protagonist can grow, or multiple arcs of the protagonist failing and growing or changing in different ways... but in my opinion they are just larger-scale extensions of these same basic concepts illustrated here.

it is perhaps a rather winded and esoteric explanation, but i hope that you can nonetheless find some value in and grow from it in turn. best of luck with your writing!

[syntaxeme]

Magic Only Goes So Far

[A/N: I thought I had posted this before, but it looks like I didn’t. So let’s have a talk about the politics of witches in the LLtHW world. Featuring Norah Colbert!]

           “My work isn’t hurting anyone. If they have the right to go about knocking on other people’s doors to interrupt an otherwise quiet evening with their pagan singing—”

           “Pagan? You’re calling us pagan?”

           “Yelling, always yelling. Is that really necessary?” Davronius grumbled, lifting his head. “Turn it down.”

           “Shh,” Mika said, waving a hand at him, trying to watch the televised trial. On the screen, a middle-aged couple was arguing with a woman seemingly in her late thirties.

           “All of my work is performed on my own property and involves no one else but myself and my colleagues,” she was saying, her ring-beaded fingers slowly tapping out a steady rhythm against the arm of her chair on the witness stand. Back straight, head held high, she looked as if this entire proceeding was an imposition. “I have never harmed—nor even spoken to—these people or their children. We’ve lived in that house for fifty years, and never once has a neighbor complained.” 

           “Your Honor, we’ve seen her performing these...rituals at night,” argued one of the accusers.

           “In my home, which should be private and usable as I see fit,” she countered, setting her sharp gaze on the woman who had spoken. “Shall we talk, instead, about your blatant spying on my personal affairs?”

           “All these politics. Why are you so intent on controlling one another?” Davronius piped up again.

           “Davi, hush!” Mika hissed. He grumbled and stood, stretching out deeply before clawing up to lie across her lap. If it would keep him quiet, she would withstand that.

           “Mr. and Mrs. Handler, your evidence has been submitted. If you have nothing further, the jury will now deliberate.” The jury filed out of the room, and the defendant returned to her attorney, where a sleek, black crow was perched on the back of her chair. The coverage went to commercial, and Mika sighed heavily.

           “This is so ridiculous,” she muttered. “I can’t believe they’re trying to make her move.”

           “Mm, especially knowing what she could do to them if she wanted,” Davi purred. She shook her head at him.

           “Thinking like that is what got me shot. You want that sort of ideology to spread?”

           “Of course not,” he muttered, frustrated that she had brought up the shooting, which he still considered at least partially his fault. “But it would be much less worrisome if you were allowed to defend yourself without fear of repercussions. Don’t you find it frustrating to have your power regulated? Doesn’t it make you uncomfortable?”

           “No,” she said. “Uncomfortable” wasn’t the best word. Outraged. Defiant. Desperate for change. She wouldn’t say “uncomfortable.” She certainly wasn’t naïve enough to think they were safe from bigots like these; that idea had been banished from her mind years ago, and she had the scars to prove it. But Davi’s answer to a threat was always retaliation. He didn’t get it; tensions were already high enough without adding fuel to the fire. So to speak. “Not if it makes us easier to trust.”

           From down the hall came Canaan’s voice, a welcome distraction.

           “She’s a black magic woman, and she’s tryin’ to make a devil out of me,” he sang as he reached the back of the couch, burying his face into her hair.

           “Good morning,” she said, turning around to kiss his nose. “You know that song doesn’t apply to me.”

           “Mm, sorry. I’m just such a sucker for Santana,” he answered with a laugh. “What are you doing up so early?” Davi mewled loudly, refusing to be ignored, so Mika’s husband gave his ears a quick scratch to placate him.

           “Norah’s trial is this morning. They’re broadcasting it,” she told him. “I can’t believe they even let this go to court. You can’t evict someone just because you don’t like what she does for a living!”

           “Apparently, you can if she’s a witch,” he said bitterly as he went into the kitchen. “Do you want a coffee?”

           “It doesn’t make any sense! They’re saying her magic is going to corrupt their children somehow.” She shifted her position on the couch, disturbing Davi in the process; he growled and stalked off to follow Canaan into the kitchen and rub up against his legs. “What kind of logic is that? Like an agreement with a spirit is contagious or something? It’s almost…impressively stupid.” After a few seconds, she recalled his question and added, “No. Thank you.”

           “They’re just ignorant. They’re scared of things they don’t understand,” he said, pushing sleep-mussed brown curls out of his face. He must have been able to tell she was sulking, because he changed the subject. “Do you have any work to do today?”

           “I guess.” Yes, she supposed there was still her small at-home life to worry about, even with the jaws of oppression closing tighter and tighter around them every day. Getting up from her seat, she wandered into the kitchen to lean her head against his chest. “I don’t wanna.”

           “I know,” he said, bending down to kiss her head. “But your patients need you to. Come on, the sooner you get it done, the sooner you can relax.”

           “Fine,” Mika whined, pushing away from him. “If you’re that eager to get rid of me.”

           “I love you,” he called after her.

           “I love you too, you jerk.” She went into her office but left the door slightly open so that Davi could come in when he deigned to. Her orders for the month were all marked on her calendar, and she observed it in silence. After a moment, she let out a choked scream of frustration and dropped to her knees, whipping off her glasses to dry her eyes. She couldn’t keep doing this, watching these things happen around her and pretending it wasn’t abuse. Seeing the names and faces of people she knew show up as casualties in another “mysterious” case of arson with no known suspects. Seeing her friends disappear one by one and listening to news anchors say the trend of deaths “wasn’t about that.”

           Norah was such an instrumental part of American magic society; if they proved they could control her, all of the hard-won progress, everything accomplished in the past ten years, would be practically meaningless. Mika curled her knees up to her chest and rested her head against them, telling herself that things would get better. People would change. She knew this. But how long would it take? And how many witches would be left to benefit from it?

           “Mrr?” Davi sauntered into the room, slowly padding over to cross underneath her bent knees. He sat beside her, tail flicking back and forth, and watched her critically. “You know, if you don’t work, you’re giving them what they want.” He pawed absently at her arm. One of his claws got stuck in her shirt, and she had to free it for him.

           With a deep sigh, she forced herself to stand. Her work helped people, she reminded herself, and that was reason enough to keep at it. Not to prove it to anyone. Just because it was true. She sat at her desk, and Davi jumped up to sit in her lap again. While she was writing out formulas, she slid her free hand smoothly down his back and was consoled by the soft vibrations through his chest.

[wang-yeon]

Chewing gum (Park Jimin X reader)

Warning: cursing, sexual themes, smut I guess, raunchy language, mentions of alcohol, slight mention of drugs but not really, fluffy fluff

Summary: y/n has enough piled on her plate being a full time college student and began a virgin is added to the list. In seek to ridden her purity  she attempts to find the right guy. Little does she know that the right guy is more interested in something else rather than her purity.

college is a stressful time for any young adult struggling with their inner bullshit. Each day you are faced with a new face on campus. A new story. Friendships bond over simple conversations that start from  inconsequential talk to a mind bending relationship. Just the simple thought is to send anyone into over drive. The simple crave to have a relationship was enough to impassion or have great value to someone resulting in a great impact in there lives. enough to last a life time.

Out of all the faces in the crowd that including mine, I was the only sad bastard that desired this feeling while everyone else establish it without minding a blink. If only they knew how lucky they truly were to have a lucky someone. It doesn't even have to be someone, anyone. Sometimes we just need anyone. It doesn't matter who it is. Just anyone to remind us what's it like to live in the moment, and feel something before its over completely.

Sure I did have that one person that attempted to pursue these unrealistic goals. His name was Jeon Jungkook , but he often went by the name of Jungcock. I remember that specific moment he tried to be that anyone, making me live in the moment but very poorly.

I had came to the conclusion that it was a brilliant idea to lose my virginity the night me and jungkook had attended a forced religious study brought to you by my ever so 'loving' parents. This making it the perfect setting to fuck, sorry to put it bluntly but these were the thoughts that once surfaced my sick teenage brain. Of course the mood hadn't been set, while I was completely ignoring it jungkook was soaking in the awkwardness.

Many attempts later trying to get jungkook off he finally lets out a cry, which I totally took the wrong way. Thinking it was a cry from pleasure I began jerking him off faster making his face  contort into a painful expression. I evidently got the hint once he busted out into tears. I had planned the night out to the brim but what I didn't imagine was to have a crying jungkook, patting him awkwardly as he poured out his gay fantasies.

Safe to say ever since that night I had reminded a virgin. Which isn't wrong I just didn't want to live this depriving life anymore. yes there was always porn but that never works out for me. see before the porn even started I would already find myself turned on, just like any horny virgin stuck in college.

As soon as I would click on the 'adult entertainment' the plot beings instantly killing my lady boner. it doesn't add up to me, I come on the site for one thing to simple pleasure myself by seeing a 7-10 minute film filled with satisfying moans but instead I'm faced with a full on movie with a real plot as if they are gonna win a Oscar.

I had been convinced that my vagina had been broken. so I hide myself from the world. Surviving from ramen noodles and red bulls I was all set. I was to afraid that the world would perceive me differently because of this. People would often use my virginity to their advantage, seeing my purity as a prize. My only source being able to hide. until my roommate told me other wise. she had brought up how I wasn't being social that being one of the reasons my vagina had magically stopped working. It just gave up.

My vagina wants convinced no one wanted it because it was untouched and pure. Like a flower, if that flower was all fucked up suffering from her dumbass roommate.     

Hours passed as she attempted to revamp my whole being. almost to the point of looking like a stripper. not to insult the strippers out there, I'm sure your definitely doing better off then me. the only reason why I decided to try and go to this party was not because of my new found appearance or because my roommates boyfriend namjoon would be getting the alcohol but because I was simply promised food.

nothing more nothing less.

there wasn't even food.

nothing but alcohol.

My roommate had left me by the time we got through the door leaving me to awkwardly pretend like I'm having an intimate fake conversation on the phone. "whos the lucky guy?" my attention was cut sort as I turned around being faced with a cheeky brunette who I must say had an award winning smile. His face was sure enough to kick start my broken vagina

(I am so sorry, I wrote this at 2am and I am now realizing what the fuck is wrong with me)

"the guy on the phone, or is it a girl. It is the 21st century and all." the overly handsome boy said pointing to my phone.

He must had heard the conversation between me and...well nobody sensing I had no one to talk to besides myself.

"Oh it was nobody." I say waving him off a with a slight smile, one that couldn't compete to his. it was weird that I was feeling such fondness to someone I haven't properly met, but damn was he good to look at.

"Oh well if it was nobody then I guess they wouldn't mind if I introduced myself." I never nodded my head as fast I did  in that moment, I swear I almost broke my neck. I was still in the process of trying to figure out what he wanted to do with me. if only he knew what lied beneath all this stripper exterior. again no disrespect to strippers.

"My name is park jimin, but you can just call me jimin I don't mind. what about you? a beautiful girl like you must have a name."

He had me wrapped around his finger

"Oh my names Y/N, you can call me Y/N noting special I'm sorry." I played off my awkwardness with a quick deprived laugh.

"woah."

"what?" I began to panic searching my face for any minor detail on my face as his small statement worried me.

"Oh nothing, its just I cant believe someone as perfect as you could also share the name of a goddess." Jimin held a sweet exterior and I wanted nothing more than to see what he could actually be capable of when he gets the upper hand. it took everything in me to not rip his clothes off.

a small tug on my dress brought me out of my 'I need to fuck jimin' phase, as I turned around a complete bored expression painted my face. my roommate had come in at the most imperfect time. she had been the one to come up with the idea to get my broken vagina back in the works. I haven't even seen her this entire party and she pops up now. this must mean that I wasn't meant to have sex with jimin.

ha lets be honest I'm still gonna have sex with jimin.

but before I could take any sort of action my oh so lovely roommate decided to tug me off with her to a beer pong table. Jimin still sported his loving smile while I was being tugged away but soon deflated as I grew further away. well looks like I lost the only chance of sex tonight. I was placed at the head of the table, the horizon filled with seas of solo red cups with what I assumed were filled with beer.a happy roommate by my side wishing I could share the same expression but remained the unamused expression. That was until I found out who we were playing against.

"Hey jimin get over here, I cant lose to my girlfriend and her roommate." my head immediately shot up at namjoons mention of jimin. my head fully coming up from its previous stances as I face jimin.

He flashes me a smirk and bites his lips as he made eye contact with me. I noticed that he had gained more confidence due to his kill worthy actions and as I look over at the cups in my view and cant help but eagerly wonder how much more confidence jimin can gain by the simple sip of a cup. or two. the couple of rounds were spent by many laughs and the splashes of the ball hitting the intoxicating beer. as the rounds went on we saw the game as nothing but a blur enjoining each others company.

namjoon and roommate had been all over each other while me and jimin oh so subtlety flirted and shared affectionate glances. these actions were enough to send me into over drive.

I began to completely forget about the game as the sound of the ball hitting the rim clinked in my ears every chance I got. jimin retrieved the ball before sparing me a glance.

"This shot goes out to my lucky lady!" Jimin said clearly intoxicated but so was everyone at that party including myself. he still managed to make my heart swell even in his drunken oblivion.

"Go ahead kiss the ball baby, your my little good luck charm." jimin said shoving the ball in my face.

This situation already was weird by his choice of words but grew weirder as he shoved the ball in my face. none of the less I kissed the ball still remaining eye contact with him which he found oddly sexy.

"Maybe one on the lips for extra good luck." Oh park jimin was gonna be the death of me. I had to be a complete idiot to deny this. I placed my arms around his neck as he placed his around my waist. our lips were centimenairs apart, thesecual tensions driving us to close the gap.

"Hey don't give him all of your luck, we don't want them to win!" my roommate said as she proceeded to pull me and jimin apart. we both let out a loud sigh going back in our previous position. remind me to get a new roommate. eventfully jimin made the cup earning a satisfying splashing victory fill his teams ears.

I quickly reached for the cup noticing it being different from the cups, it being marked as 'the krusty krab secret formula'. Of course I drank it but as everyones face twisted into a scared expression I went quiet.

"Woah, whats wrong with you guys?"

"Joon, she took the special one...The dru-"

"I fucking know, cant you see me freaking out. maybe she'll be okay."

"WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN SHELL BE OKAY?! She just took a few grams of-"

"Lets go to the pool!"

Those had to be the most awkward moments for me. I stood there silently observing as namjoon and roommate attempted to have a quiet conversation about something I couldn't catch on to. I could tell jimin was just as confused as I was, but couldn't really focus on anything as I began to see pretty shapes and colors I could distinguish.

I somehow managed to make my way to the pool, in a very unstable fashion do to the liquids in my system. Everyone in the pool had took the liberty to swim in their underwear, so I followed along.

I felt a small tap on my shoulders turning around being faced with a the shit eating smirk that was painted on his face ever since the alcohol began lurking in his system. this was certainly a good thing as it was directing us to have a more direct conversation rather than sober.

"I thought I lost you for a second, couldn't lose someone as beautiful as you." To jimin he may have been saying the most simplest of things to me it was as if he was reciting a poem deep from his heart. For all I know he probably says this to countless amount of girls, what made me so special?

I quickly covered it up with a laugh and splashing water in his face which wasn't the best idea. The water had gotten trapped in his hair causing the once straight hair to become wet and stick to his forehead. Making him grow hotter.

Jimin responded by grabbing me by the waist and placing me on his shoulder, letting a yelp fall from my mouth.

"Jimin let me down." I protested but secretly knew that I didn't want him to let go. "Alright." Jimin obliged as he let go of me, a loud splash filled the atmosphere as both our bodies fell underneath the pools surface. I closed my eyes attempting to reach the surface of the pool before feeling a body collide with mine. I quickly came up to the surface with a dazed expression as my arms were locked around jimins neck and his on my waist.

It was sure enough to shock the both of us being in that position but was it a bad thing. "Look at that, I think I saved your life."

"I think you deserve an award due to such braver." I knew that my comment was risky but my actions were enough to diagnose me as borderline crazy. I had managed to easily wrap my legs around jimins waist bringing us at a closer proximity.

"Oh? I was hopping for just a kiss." Of course he was. Jimin didn't want me. He was far better then any of the guys I had ever thought of losing my virginity to. I took my legs off from around him. Looks like I was shit out of luck.

"I mean it certainly isn't a bad thing. I'm sure every part of you looks good...taste good." Jimin said seductively licking his lips as he brought my legs back around his waist. My cheeks began to flame a crimson color at his statement.

"Is this what you say to all of your girls?"

"I'm flattered that you think I have girls lined up but when will you notice it's only you. Your so beautiful. Every aspect of you. Your personality. Your beautiful body. Your perfect baby." Jimin finished his heartfelt sentence with a firm squeeze on my ass making it the icing on the cake.

I carefully brought my lips to his needing the feel of our lips together. The kiss started off slow almost as afraid it would end at any moment but as it progressed we began to become intoxicated by he kiss. The alcohol already consuming our system has added to the ecstasy flowing through as intensifying the feeling. Jimin backed slowly to the pool wall his hands beginning to wander to my core. My stomach tightened at his gesture letting a low moan fall from my lips. Encouraging his confidence.

"I wanna feel you baby, is that okay?" I nodded eagerly as his hands guided his way to my heat. His hands began to circle around my clit as he began kissing my neck leaving his love bites. Truth be told was I never had an orgasm, well no guy had ever gave me an organism. It was usually always my sex deprived self left alone to take care of my business making this a completely different experience. It had gotten so intense to the point that I couldn't control my moans. Jimin attempted to silence them with his lips only making me crave the moment even more. 

He began to tease my opening, the euphoria coming in contact with my body once again. I couldn't take it anymore the feeling of the euphoria running through my body sending it into overdrive. I quickly grabbed jimins hands signaling him to stop. After all the setting we were in was a pool. Surrounded by people. Clearly Jimin couldn't help it. Somehow he did manage to extract his hands from my heat.

"Sorry, you were just so wet I couldn't help myself." It's like he wanted to take me right then and there which I would have obliged to but due to the scene sadly the circumstances couldn't have been the same.

"Jimin, it's like your trying to kill me!" I said hitting Jimin lightly on the arm embarrassed by his abrupt statement. Jimin thought nothing of it as he smiled into my neck giggling lightly.

"Don't hide your smile, it makes me insides melt." maybe the alcohol lurking in my system wasn't as good as his. I couldn't stop the flow of words leaving my mouth. each coming out after the next, each word more dirtier than the next. Even though jimin had the chance to swim away from me he didn't, choosing to stay. I had came to the conclusion that he was absoultuly insane, lucky for him I am to. obviously.

"Well I have to say seeing you in such minimal clothing really makes me want me take you here right now." Jimin said going along with conversation but his dirty talk was far better than mine, it also having a greater affect.

"And seeing you in this pool,water all over your body. Oh baby I'm sure you can be wetter than this." By this point I was dripping and ready for my virginity to be gracefully taken by park jimin.

We had managed to stumble up the steps with drunken kisses in  search of the nearest bedroom in need to relieve the tension. Panic began to roll through my body as we entered the room, jimin quickly closing the door pushing me into the wall where he continued to kiss me. His hands soon diverted to the inside of my thighs growing closer to my heat. This simple action caused a loud moan to escape from my lips surprising jimin before a dark expression rolled over his face.

Jimin quickly picked me up placing me on the bed where he got in between my thighs ever so slightly and gently grinding against my core. At an agonizing rate. I wanted more lifting my hips meeting his thrusting making him let a deep groan but silencing it as his lips connected to my neck, me responding constantly to each mark he made.

"Hey can we try something?" I said in a quiet voice, not trusting myself to speak to loud afraid I would let out a loud moan. Jimin nodded his head but still continued his journey on leaving soft purple marks on my neck.  I pushed him back a little before taking my shirt off causing jimins heart to quicken and his eyes to widen.

"Um may...May touch..Your um." I laughed at the new jimin before me. One who was stuttering due to nervousness. It was as if the confidence drained from him as I gided his hands to my clothed boobs. it was cute to see him venerable. His hands remained stiff before he squeezed them slightly making a quiet moan leave my lips.

 This obviously encouraging him he continued his actions before I reached to updo my bra to which he stopped me. "Hey its okay, we don't have to do any drastic."

"Oh, um okay." I took my hand away from my bra straps bringing them to my side.

I had never gone this far with a guy and when I almost had they were never as indering as jimin was. I looked over his features before placing his face in my hands connecting our lips together. I climbed on his lap enjoying the sounds falling from his lips and I'm sure he felt the same as for me. I slowly grinded my hips feeling his member poke my thigh.

I proceeded to take off his shirt feeling over his muscles liking the skin to skin contact.  our tonuges began to battle for dominance, I gided my ran to his member causing me to win the battle.  I quickly reached for his zipper bringing it down before he stopped me.

"Hey calm down, we don't have to go this fast. We don't even have to have sex if you want to?" It cared that he worried about me and my thoughts but in reality I wanted nothing more but to fuck him and finally be ridden rom my virginity. "sorry I'm just really nervous."

"hey its okay like I said we don't have to do anything, I still think your a cool girl." a cool girl? I wanted be so much more than a cool girl, but I didn't protest instead just silently accepting.

"Yeah, we can still hang out, without doing anything major."

"Yeah, I would love to keep on talking to the beautiful girl I met tonight. Well I guess I should take you home." And just like that my virginity dreams were crushed. 

jimin had managed to drive me back to my dorm room with the help of making sure I was in the right state of mind. I invited him into the dorm with open arms as he excepted it insisting he needed to nurse me back to health. aka he wanted to have sex with me. at least I think I sat fidgeting on my bed as jimin retrieved some water for me, and then proceeding to sit on the bed with me crossing his fingers. as we both sat in silence.

filling the air with tension.

"I'm sorry." I say as my lips quivered realizing my idiotic behavior that occurred throughout the night.

"Oh baby you don't need to be sorry, sure the night didn't go as we planned but one thing for sure is that I met a beautiful girl through it."

Their he goes again saying romantic things making my heart swoon. why did he have to be so perfect. to perfect. someone I couldn't get no matter how hard I longed for.

"Oh please, I'm not beautiful. sure with the makeup I look descent but besides that, I look identical to a trashcan." Jimin had a bored expression playing on his face as these words left my mouth not beliving a word that flowed from my mouth.

"Okay you want me to be honest? You remind me of a flower, a flower that is anything but beautiful and worthy, at least that's what people may think. but when you bloom and open up to the people around you that's when your beauty shows. You need to open up to people more instead of opening your legs to get to the source, because that doesn't matter like your personality ."

Sure the beginning of the sentence didn't begin off oh so glamorous but it was the message that he proclaimed that caused his statement to come off sincere. In that moment I realized that I was looking for something when something else had already found me. what I'm trying to say is that I was seeking to lose my virginity something that means a lot to a person, that's all I was focused on.

While jimin was focused on the likeability, he didn't care about my sex appeal just about my heart. That's all he was seeking  for, just someone he could care for. He found me. I was to naïve to realize it. I was lost in my head. He was lost in his heart. He wasn't as lost as I was, I was far beyond lost that I couldn't make sense of it or why it was meant for me but yet I began to be drawn to it all. 

Now as we lay in my bed mindlessly kissing Id like to think after all the tragic events that occurred that somehow he feels the same. So perhaps being connected to someone and not in a sexual  derogatory manor but rather as a close relationship. This being something I had craved all along. The need to need someone, anyone.

Jimins hands carefully holding my waist making me feel like I am as fragile and delicate as a doll. His care makes me feel as if I was his main priority. Its crazy after one night how quick a connection can occur between two people. weather it be a friendship or sexual encounter.

I had thought about what the world thinks of me. My appearance. my personality. My virginity. every aspect of me. I have thought about this for so long that some parts of me have changed to fit the life of others I achieved to once be. I can see now that virginity has nothing to do with these aspects.Just some sorry excuses i used, blocking out the real problem. I longed for a human connection.

His soft snores filled my ears his arms wrapping tighter around me as if he's afraid that ill leave. I had someone who cares about me and shows open affection, and if at least one person can see my true self/ beauty instead of seeing my virginity as a title. then I can have the will power to show my true self and actually open up to the people I care for the most.

A/n I wanted to post this story sometime sooner but turns out a special person was giving birth and I had to go witnesses it and I saw EVERYTHING but I manage to finish the writing while she gave birth. also I'm thinking about a part two

[afangirlrambles]

Let Me In (2/?)

Summary: You are a new addition to the Avengers, and have only ever seen your teammates with their walls up. However, one by one they slowly start to let you in, and you finally see them as human.

A/N: I feel like this series will just get better and better. I’m starting to hammer out what I want the tone to be, and this was just a blast to write. I kind of want to talk about this part so I’ll put a longer author’s note after the tags for anyone who wants to read my thoughts about this part. Enjoy! And a giant thank you to everyone who read Tony’s part and liked, reblogged, commented, sent me an ask, etc. I was so motivated during this part and I know that that feeling will just get bigger and bigger!! :)

Warnings: language (some stronger swears here friends), mild (non-graphic) violence

Words: 1900 (yeah buddy)

Tony Stark (Part 1)

Natasha Romanoff

“Natasha!”

Gunshots rang in your ears, and you could physically feel the electricity crackling in the air from Thor’s hammer.

“Get down! Clint, is the quinjet on the ground?”

Everything felt underwater, and you found you couldn’t really move that well. Battlefields were supposed to be mad, but this was something else entirely.

“Look out! Tony, take out that sniper now!”

You heard an explosion come from somewhere nearby. Another bomb went off significantly closer this time. Someone yelled and then the world faded to black.

--

(Four hours earlier)

You took a deep breath and relaxed your shoulders, aiming your gun at the target. You exhaled through an entire magazine of rounds, only blinking once the ringing of the shot had stopped echoing around the range.

“Nice grouping.”

You turned around, surprised to find a smug redhead smirking back at you. She was wearing her patented black leather bodysuit, posture stiff and tense.

“Steve sent me to get you. We got a lead on a Hydra base in Serbia. Liftoff’s in 20. Cap wants us all in command central for a briefing.” She turned abruptly on her heels and walked out of the range, obviously expecting you to follow her.

You put your gun back in your hip holster and hurried after her. There was no part of her that was Natasha Romanoff in that moment. She was all Widow, carefully constructed exterior and guarded interior.

Thinking about it, you weren’t sure you’d ever seen the real Natasha. Maybe a few moments here and there when she was talking to Clint or watching a movie with Wanda, but never when she was around you.

It made sense given her past why she’d be more than a little closed off to strangers, but it still hurt that she didn’t consider you enough of a teammate to open up. At least Bruce had said more than five non-mission related words to you, and he turned into a green rage monster.

You’d definitely been warned about the Widow before you joined the team, but nothing could have prepared you for just how hard she was. You tried talking to Tony about it, but all he could tell you was that there wasn’t any special formula for Natasha. She either trusted you or she didn’t.

The whole team was geared up and waiting for the two of you when you walked into the briefing room. It was still a little intimidating to see Captain America and the Winter Soldier in full gear, if you were being honest with yourself, but you were slowly getting used to it. Each mission you went on made you feel a little more comfortable with standing toe to toe with the Avengers.

Steve gave the team a rundown of the layout of the base and how many Hydra agents to predict. It was a relatively small base with no seizable assets, meaning all you had to do was eliminate the agents and blow up the base.

Clint flew everyone to Siberia on the quinjet. Tensions were high as they usually were before a mission, and you found everyone’s pre-mission routines interesting. Bruce listened to classical music, the twins talked to each other in Russian with as little personal space as possible, and Thor had arm wrestling tournaments with Vision.

Today, however, you found yourself staring at Natasha more often than not. She was in the copilot seat next to Clint, just sitting in silence. They seemed to stabilize in the other’s presence, and you could almost see them mentality gearing up for a fight.

When the quinjet touched down, everyone stood up and waited for the ramp to drop down. Tony gave you a pat on the back before taking off into the sky with Vision and Thor. Sam, Bucky, and Steve cleared the upper floors of the compound, while the Maximoffs and Bruce maintained a perimeter. You, Clint, and Natasha cleared the lower floors while also planting explosives to be detonated after it was cleared.

“Hey, Capsicle, you wanna look out a window and tell me what you see,” Tony buzzed in your ear.

“Stark, I don’t see anything. It looks all clear.”

“That’s my point, Rogers. We were expecting minimal resistance, not a ghost town.”

Clint added, “Tony’s right. We’re almost done with these floors and we’ve only taken out four operatives.”

Wilson was incredulous as he said, “You’re almost done? We’re not even halfway through yet!”

“Friday, run a thermal scan on the compound’s main building.”

The three of you came to a Y in the hallway. Clint took one side, while you and Natasha stalked down the other.

“What are you thinking, Tony?” You spoke up.

“It should have taken you much longer to sweep the place. It’s small but not that small. I think maybe- son of a bitch! Damn it! Get out of there now!”

Natasha’s eyes started frantically sweeping the hallway. “Talk to us, Tony. What’s happening?”

“The place is red hot! Agents crawling the place. They have to be in the wa-”

That’s when the hallway exploded.

Doors that weren’t there before started sliding open, and the hallway closed itself off, leaving you and Natasha trapped with nearly a dozen Hydra agents.

The two of you went back to back and went to work. You didn’t let more than three feet of space get between you, not wanting to get separated. You worked better as a team.

The Black Widow was clearly better in hand-to-hand combat, but you had been assigned to the Avengers for a reason. You could do more than hold your own in a fight. Your weapons of choice were two knives, about the size of your hand. You could throw them up to 60 feet with deadly accuracy and were faster than any low level Hydra agent with a handgun.

You heard bones crack behind you just as the hilt of one of your knives disappeared into the back of the last agent on your side of the hall. Turning around, the Widow flashed you her signature smirk and said, “Nice aim. You really should teach Clint how-”

You’d heard rumors of a guy somewhere in Asia that could see what was going to happen before it did. Like future echoes of people that he could see and predict. Damn it if that wasn’t what was happening now.

An agent crumpled on the ground behind Natasha raised his gun at her, and instinct took over. Her eyes went wide as you shoved her out of the way.

A shot went off. You felt pain in your stomach right before you crumpled to the ground.

--

Four weeks into rehab and you still couldn’t walk more than half a mile on your own. You really owed Bruce for stabilizing your bleeding on the jet, but if he made you do another set of trunk twists you were going to strangle him in his sleep.

You probably weren’t going to return to missions for a couple months, but Tony insisted you came to briefings, mainly so he could make gimpy jokes but also so you could still be a part of the team.

Every time you walked into that command center now, you had flashbacks to that day. When you got shot. And not necessarily in a bad way, but you couldn’t help all the events from replaying over and over in your mind.

“Hey, gimpy!” Tony grinned at you, as you hobbled your way into the room.

“Really? Every time, Stark?” You rolled your eyes, but gave him a sly smile back.

Steve launched into his speech about where they were going and what they would encounter. There were some pretty big fish in Hydra’s organization they were hoping to fry. He started passing out files on different higher-ups and their profiles.

“Damn it,” muttered Steve.

Tony gave a mock gasp and said, “Language, Captain!”

Taking the higher ground and choosing to ignore Stark, Steve said, “I left some files in my room when I was gearing up. Y/N, would you mind-”

Before you had a chance to process the question, Natasha was jumping up to get the files. She was doing that a lot lately, doing things instead of you, for you. She still didn’t really talk to you, remaining mysterious as ever.

And she did it with everything, practically all the time. She fueled Bucky’s motorcycle during training after he asked you to. She grabbed a wrench for Tony from the kitchen while he was working on a new suit. She even covered most of your research for future missions that Fury asked you to do.

She never asked you about it, she just did it.

And you knew why. Because you felt like you’d cracked Natasha Romanoff.

Obviously not fully or even close to the way Clint knew her, but through this whole process you had learned a very integral part of who she was.

--

“Y/N, here’s that profile on the agent we arrested last week that Fury wanted.” Natasha put a file in front of you and started to walk away.

“You can stop, you know.” You set down your mug of tea and held constant eye contact.

She visibly bristled and turned around to face you. “Stop what?”

“I know that you’re just trying to make up for what happened. Because you feel guilty.”

Besides training, which definitely does not count, you’ve never been against the famed Black Widow before. But in that moment, she was the Widow and prowled towards you with all the vengeance she brought to the battlefield.

Through gritted teeth, she said, “Do not tell me what I feel. I’m not guilty, I’m angry. You had no right to make that decision. It’s part of the job, MY job, and I knew that when I joined the Avengers. You had no right, Y/N! What were you thinking? You could have died, your heart stopped. Do you get that? It was so reckless! Why did you do it?”

You took a deep breath and stood up so the two of you were on equal ground. “We’re teammates. I have your back. Always.”

Her eyes were wide as she recoiled slightly at your words. “I-I owe you.”

You shook your head and said, “No, you don’t. And not ever. I know you’d do the same for me. There will never be a counter between us, okay?”

Always controlled, always poised Natasha was speechless. She just stood there staring at you, and you could tell she didn’t quite believe you. She was trying to read you, figure out your angle. And you watched it cross her face when she realized you didn’t have one.

“I think Clint’s in the gym. We should probably go teach him how to properly throw some knives. What do you say, Romanoff?”

“Nat.”

Your eyebrows frowned at her, not quite understanding.

“You can call me Nat, if you want. And yeah I think Barton’s been needing a lesson for a while now.” She smirked at you and stalked off toward the gym. But it wasn’t like her old smirk. It was the one you’d seen her flash Steve during a meal, or at Tony when he was giving Peter a particularly hard time.

She’d let you in. And you knew that with Roman-

You knew with Nat that wasn’t something to take lightly.

Forever Tags:  @ spectaculicious   @ captain-amelia-bradley  @lilasiannerd 

Let Me In Tags: @ cornflax01   @ aubzylynn @purplekitten30 @ravenclaw-geek24  @tatortot270 @buckyywiththegoodhair @pressigh   @feelmyroarrrr @c-maximoffs  @fall-down-stand-up @shortiiqt16  @glittervelvetandlace 

(I’m horrible at tags please let me know if I missed anyone or tumblr didn’t tag you I really don’t know what I’m doing I love you and it wasn’t on purpose O_O)

Closing A/N: So I love Natasha Romanoff, you guys. Like to pieces. I have so many headcanons and ideas about her character, but there was only so much I could fit into one part. I obviously took the “I owe you” bit from Winter Soldier, but I did it for a reason. I think Natasha looks at life with a score/counter. She views most relationships as a series of owed debts and it takes a lot for her to just let someone help her as a friend. So when the reader took a bullet for her, she was only left to assume that she needed to do something for the reader in return. 

Also, I think she’s not really comfortable with touch. In Tony’s part, the reader put her head on his shoulder right away. He (in my opinion) can handle that level of physical contact from people. I really don’t think Natasha can from many people outside of the team. And even within the team, she’s a little wary of it from certain people. I wanted to show this, so that’s why I went with the name thing. It’s Natasha’s way of letting people get close without them needing to get physically close, if you catch my drift. I think in future parts I may show her and the reader interacting physically to show that the readers relationships with the people from past parts still grow and evolve even if they’re not shown in the part. 

Sorry for the ramble, but I felt the need to about this part a tad! If you ever want to have discussions like this (or anything else) with me PLEASE drop by my inbox or asks!! I’m super friendly and am always willing to talk!! You’re always welcome here!!

[hazandholland]

“Well, that was cute.”

Written by Christina

Category: Fluff

Word Count: 2,448 

Request: “ Hi there. I really love your blog and was wondering if I could have an imagine with Peter? Where Tony is a family friend of Adrianna's and he is very sarcastic in trying to set me up with Peter without Adrianna realizing it and it just gets all cute when Peter becomes all dorky and flustered when Tony brings her to the Avengers Pad to help with some of the mechanics. And the ending ends with Tony catching Adrianna and Peter in a kiss  Thanks, Love 💓 ” - from @misshollander1

A/N: I’m really sorry this took so long for us to do. We got a lot of requests at once, so it kind of got buried in our Google docs. I hope you guys enjoy it. As usual, please feel free to let us know if you have any feedback. :) 

Adrianna Emmons beat out the best and brightest engineers, many of whom had way more experience than she did, but she, somehow, managed to get a Ph.D. in mechanical engineering at eighteen years old, which led to her employment at Stark Industries. Her family goes far back with the Starks, back to Adrianna’s grandfather working with Howard Stark on the redevelopment of Dr. Abraham Erskine’s famous 1940’s formula. Working with Tony Stark was challenging, but Adrianna loved it. She loved building something new everyday, and working with the latest and greatest tools, as well as interacting with the world’s leading scientists and engineers.

Adrianna plopped the stack of papers onto her lab desk, straightening her glasses. She flipped open the specs for the next random modifications that Tony Stark gave her. She saw a diagram for some kind of wrist band with a miniature pressurized fluid cartridge, with a lever that fits into the wearer’s palm. She crinkled her brow. This wasn’t a typical Tony Stark device. She flipped through more of the specs, seeing an elastic mask with mobile eye covers. She gaped at the complex circuitry that was needed for the mask, which essentially had micro motion sensors that sensed the wearer’s eye lid and eyebrow movement, causing the mask to move with them. This definitely was not a Tony Stark tool. Why would Mr. Stark need an elastic mask and a web shooter? He had the Iron Man suits. She bit her lower lip and picked the phone on her lab desk, and held it to her ear, pushing the extension in for Mr. Stark’s lab.

“Mr. Stark’s lab, Pepper speaking,” The crisp voice of Pepper Potts filled Adrianna’s ear.

“Hi, Pepper, it’s Adrianna,” Adrianna answered, scanning through the rest of the specs Tony gave her. “I have some questions for Tony regarding the new modifications he gave me.”

“I’ll hand the phone to him,” Pepper said. Adrianna admired another specification for a full-body elastic and lycra suit, with an extensive amount of flexibility, allowing the wearer to complete complex acrobatics. She turned the page, and saw the details for gloves of the suit, with microscopic pores in the palms and fingertips. What was the deal? Adrianna wondered, contemplating what Tony had planned.

“Yo, M&Ms,” Tony shouted, using the childish nickname for her, based off of her last name of Emmons. “What’s up?” Adrianna heard the clanging off something metal falling off a contraption and Tony mumbling several swear words under his breath.

“I had some questions about the new specs you gave me this morning,” Adrianna answered, leaning on her foot.

“Shoot,” Tony said, his voice slightly muffled. He was probably working some new Iron Man mask.

“These specs aren’t for a new Iron Man suit,” Adrianna said, scanning the specs again. “Everything is composed of lycra or elastic, there is no armor on this suit whatsoever, the mask has expanding and contracting facial lenses, there are micropores in the fingertips of the gloves…” Adrianna’s voice trailed off, her whirling thoughts impairing her ability to speak. “What are these for, Tony?”

She heard a loud crash and she winced, knowing Tony was working on a new suit, or at least new flight boosters.

“They’re for a new recruit,” Tony groaned in response.

“A new recruit?” Adrianna repeated, planting her spare hand on the desk. “What new recruit? You didn’t tell me.”

“I didn’t realize that you wanted to know every single detail about my daily decisions, M&Ms,” Tony shot back at her, more loud clanging almost cutting his voice out. “You know, I went to the bathroom at around five a.m. this morning, and then Pepper and I had this-”

“Ew, please stop,” Adrianna said loudly, desperately not wanting Tony to finish his sentence. “I was just confused on why you didn’t clarify.”

“Just stop being so nosy and do your job, M&Ms,” Tony said. “Friday, go get the kid.” With that, Tony ended the call, leaving Adrianna with more questions than answers. She sighed and put the phone down on its stand, staring at the pile of specs. She should get to work since there were around fifty pages of information for her to decipher.

*******************************************

“Look, I’m just saying that I am perfectly capable of-” Peter said. It was irritating to him that Mr. Stark wouldn’t let him help with the modifications on his suit. Well, there were so many modifications, and they weren’t even touching his old suit, Mr. Stark was basically building him a brand new suit from scratch. Peter wanted to see the process, because of he was at Stark Industries. The Stark Industries! There he was, standing in Tony Stark’s personal lab as Tony completed finishing touches on one of his Iron Man suits.

“Look, kid,” Tony interrupted, waving a screwdriver at Peter, “We’ve been over this; I’m giving you an upgrade. Or rather, one of my engineers is. She-”

“She?” Peter repeated, his spine straightening and his eyebrows shooting up, almost off his forehead. “Did you say ‘she’?”

“Yeah, she,” Tony confirmed, focusing his attention back on the suit. “Adrianna. Smart kid. Known her since she was a fetus.” Tony glanced at Peter, who had a look of awestruck wonder and curiosity on his face.

“You could meet her. Friday,” Tony said, the volume of his voice increasing when he addressed the AI.

“Yes, Mr. Stark?” The AI responded, making Peter flinch. Oh my gosh, that is so cool! Peter thought, looking for the speakers that blasted the AI’s voice into the lab.

“Where’s M&Ms?” Tony asked, dropping the screwdriver he was using and picking up a soldering gun, holding it against the suit, causing sparks to fly everywhere. Peter opened his mouth to comment on how Mr. Stark should use a welding mask, so he didn’t get a spark in his eyes, but Friday answered Tony’s question before Peter could get a sound out.

“She’s in the main mechanics laboratory, Mr. Stark,” Friday responded.

“Great,” Tony said, still soldering something in his suit. Peter just stood there, staring at Mr. Stark, unsure of whether he should go see this girl engineer, or if he should try to help Mr. Stark with his suit. Peter’s spider sense went off, letting him know that something was hurtling towards him. He held up his hand and caught a large monkey wrench. He glanced at Mr. Stark, who was standing there was a smirk on his face.

“Go away,” Mr. Stark said, waving Peter towards the door. “Go see M&Ms.” Peter smiled and darted out the door, curious and excited to meet a female engineer named M&Ms. Maybe she would have some advice for him about colleges.

***********************************

Adrianna slipped on her prescription safety glasses, her regular glasses sitting on the table next to the specs for the circuitry inside the mask. She hunched forward, stabilizing her elbows on the table as she began to solder the wires together, focused on her work. She made good progress; sewing the suit, gloves, mask and shoes in about two hours. The mechanics for the wristbands, which she discovered were web shooters, took another hour. The trickiest part was the wiring the micro motion sensors in the mask since they were small and their circuitry was incredibly intricate. She finished soldering all of the wires for one of the lens. She put down the soldering gun, holding the mask up. Now she needed to see if the micro motion sensors worked. She was just about to pull the mask over her own head when someone tapped on the desk.

She jumped, almost dropping the mask, staring at the person who knocked on the desk with wide eyes. A boy. A cute one. To make matters worse, he looked to be around her age. She looked the boy up and down. He had brown hair styled into a modern take of a comb-over, a navy blue zip-up, jeans and a unit circle t-shirt drawn as a pizza. He had a soft jawline, giving him a slight babyface appearance. His eyes were what got her heart pounding like a drum. They were the riches brown she had ever seen, and they were wide as they drank her in. Maybe his heart was racing as much as hers was.

“Hi,” Adrianna squeaked out.

“Hi,” the boy said, his voice quiet.

“I’m Adrianna,” She said, turning her gaze back to the mask.

“P-Peter,” the boy said, stuttering in the most adorable way possible.

“What are you doing here, Peter?” Adrianna asked, risking another glance at him. He was staring at her as if she was the most precious piece of art in a museum.

“”I-I’m uh, um, I’m here for the, uh, um, s-suit,” Peter croaked out, pointing quickly at the mask in her hands before shoving his hands in his pockets. Or, at least he tried. One hand landed in his pocket, but the other one missed, sliding down his leg. Since he applied so much force on his hands, his hand missing the pocket caused him to stumble forward. Adrianna flinched, leaning away slightly as Peter tumbled towards her. The hand that missed his pocket shot out, landing on the table in front of Adrianna, stopping him from colliding into her. The result was Peter towering over Adrianna, staring at her with his gorgeous brown doe eyes. Was this Tony’s new recruit? Adrianna thought. 

“S-s-s-s-sorry,” Peter stammered, his eyes staring at her lips, which were parted slightly. Adrianna fixed her gaze on the neckline of Peter’s shirt, which had fallen open a little bit since he was leaning forward. She could see the gentle divet of between his pectoral muscles.

“It’s ok,” She mumbled, tearing her eyes from Peter’s muscles. Peter straightened, putting his hand slowly in his pockets. Thankfully, this time both of them hit their target.

“So, you’re here for the suit?” Adrianna asked, hoping her voice wasn’t going to betray her still-thumping heart.

“Y-yeah!” Peter said enthusiastically. “Are you finished?”

“I was just about to test the micro-motion sensors in the lenses in the mask,” Adrianna answered, holding the mask to Peter. “Do you want to try it?” Peter nodded and seized the mask from her hands, pulling it over his head. Adrianna focused on the lens, trying not to imagine Peter’s heart-melting eyes under them. The eyes started to expand and contract, rapidly. She smiled.

“Great! They work!” She said excitedly. Peter pulled the mask off, the motion messing up his formerly-groomed hair. He looked even cuter with messy hair.

“That is awesome!” Peter said, the biggest smile breaking across his lips. “Thank you so much!” Peter’s eyes met Adrianna’s again.

“No problem,” She said quietly, giving him an equally wide smile.

“Hey, Parker,” Tony’s voice rang over the intercom.

“Yes, Mr. Stark?” Peter yelled, his gaze fixed on the ceiling.

“Cap’s about six hours from Germany. We need to leave. Now.” Tony said his voice firm. Adrianna pursed her lips, trying to think of why Captain America being in Germany would be important.

“On my way!” Peter shouted, darting towards the door. Before he left, he turned to Adrianna. “Thank you, Adrianna.” He flashed a sweet smile at her before he turned on his heel and ran to wherever he was going. She sighed, resting her elbow on the desk and propping her head on her hand. About a second later, she heard several thumps and saw Peter sprint back into the lab, running to Adrianna. She straightened, feeling her brow furrow in confusion.

“Peter, you’re supposed to-” She started to say but Peter interrupted her.

“I forgot something,” Peter said. He reached her and grabbed her face, slamming his lips against hers. Adrianna felt the world stop, even if it was impossible, as she closed her eyes and savored the kiss. She raised a hand and rested her fingertips on Peter’s stomach, feeling a set of surprisingly firm abdomen muscles. Peter gasped a little and pulled away from her, staring at her. There was a moment of silence as both Peter and Adrianna recovered from the kiss. There was a slow clap, causing them to jump. Peter faced the doorway, holding Adrianna behind him, so she could be protected from the ‘dangerous’ genius, billionaire philanthropist standing in the doorway, clad in his Iron Man suit, leaning against the door frame, slow-clapping.

“Well, that was cute,” Tony said, straightening. “But we have to go now.” With his comment still in the air, he flew off, the sound of his modified boosters echoing down the hallway. Peter stepped away, blushing.

“I, uh, I should go,” He mumbled, motioning towards the door.

“Okay,” Adrianna said, pursing her lips. “The rest of your suit is already on the jet since Tony said you might need it on short notice. Peter glanced at her as he walked to the door, with a look of wonder in his eyes.

“Thanks, Adrianna.” Peter’s voice made her heart melt and she smiled wide. Peter started sprinting when he reached the doorway.

“I’m coming, Mr. Stark!” Peter shouted, his voice fading down the hallway.

Adrianna smiled, admiring Peter’s dorkiness. 

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[theconservativebrief]

It sounds good, the idea of eating “naturally.” There are natural food stores and natural sweeteners. You can buy all-natural grapefruit juice. You can buy “natural artisan flavor birthday cake flavoring.” Instructions for following a paleo diet advise that you eat only natural foods, like your pre-agricultural ancestors. “Natural” recalls a prelapsarian past, the way food was supposed to be before we messed it up with industry.

But defining “natural” food has proved difficult. The FDA still does not have an official definition of the designation, although they are trying; in March 2018, the agency announced they’d be announcing one “very soon.” (They have not yet.) Emotionally, we know what “natural” is. Scientifically, it’s much less clear.

Alan Levinovitz, an assistant professor of religion at James Madison and a freelance journalist who’s written widely about our collective enchantment with the concept of “natural,” argues that the question of what qualifies is not simply a nutritional issue, but a moral one.

“Natural” connotes “goodness,” he wrote recently in the Washington Post, dissecting the current lawsuit over the relative natural or unnatural merits of LaCroix sparkling water. “Seeking out natural products is about health, yes, but holistic health,” he wrote. “Physical and spiritual, personal and planetary. Nature becomes a secular stand-in for God, and the word ‘natural’ a synonym for ‘holy.’”

So how did we get here, worshiping at the altar of the natural? And are we wrong? I called Levinovitz to talk about the relationship between food and morality.

Our conversation has been condensed and edited for clarity.

Rachel Sugar

A lot of your recent writing makes the case that the discourse around food closely mirrors the discourse around religion. There are “good” foods and “bad” foods and “guilt-free” foods. Ordering or not ordering French fries has moral weight. Why is that?

Alan Levinovitz

The way that we create identity for ourselves is — in part, at least — through rituals, and the ritual of eating is a really important one. We have to do it three times a day, it’s very personal, we take something from outside of our bodies and put it inside of our bodies, so it makes sense that we would really pay attention to that ritual as something that helps us to articulate our values.

It seems to me that a lot of the really intense debate that we see around food and what we should eat and what we shouldn’t eat is bound up with larger questions of our identity and how we understand really broad moral questions, like our duties to the environment or our duties to animals.

Rachel Sugar

One of the things that gets really morally weighted is the idea of natural food being better. Natural is good. Artificial is bad. Where does that association come from?

Alan Levinovitz

When I started researching food and thinking about food and talking to people about how they choose the foods that they want to eat, the idea that what’s natural is what’s good came up again and again. People wanted to find natural foods, they would look for “natural” on food labels, and they also wanted to adjust their dietary patterns to what they considered natural.

It became clear to me that “natural” was sort of a secular stand-in for a generalized understanding of goodness, which in religion you’d call holiness, or purity, or something like that. “Nature,” with a capital N, was taking the place of God. In a secular society, we don’t look to religions to tell us what to eat or how to heal ourselves, so you need a secular substitute when it comes to generalized guidance for what you can eat, and that secularized substitute is nature.

There’s this idea of nature as a kind of entity that wills certain things and has designed things in one way and not another, and that gets weighted morally: What nature is becomes what ought to be. In that sense, it really performs a lot of the functions that God performs in traditional religious thought.

Rachel Sugar

Has it always been that way? I keep thinking about periods in history where people were really excited about highly processed foods — the 1950s, for example, when you start to see a real boom in convenience foods.

Probably not “natural.” Getty Images/Tetra Images RF

Alan Levinovitz

Yeah, it’s not always been the case, or at least it’s been the case, but in complicated ways. If we go back a long, long time, we find that ideas of how humans should relate to nature had to do with perfecting nature.

In early Indian cuisine, you would purify butter to get ghee, and the ideal form of butter was this clarified, purified form. Refined foods were the ideal foods. You wanted refined grains; you wanted white rice. Refined products were eaten by refined people. You get the same reflection of morality in food production, except back then, the idea was that humans were supposed to perfect nature.

But it’s complicated. Even if you go back through Shakespeare’s plays, “unnatural” is a synonym for “bad.” An “unnatural” death means you’re murdered, whereas a “natural” death is dying of old age in your bed. So the idea that natural is synonymous with good and unnatural is synonymous with evil really does run through history strongly — it’s just how we conceive of what’s natural that gets complicated.

Rachel Sugar

So I guess I should back up and ask what might be the most basic question: When we say “natural” today, what do we even mean?

Alan Levinovitz

I think that right now, what “natural” means in a very broad sense is “systems that exist beyond and before human beings.” I think about it on a continuum. The most natural things are things that would have existed without humans interfering at all, and the least natural things are things we can only imagine existing with human interference. Maybe ferns in some untouched valley would be the most natural thing.

Rachel Sugar

You see a lot of people concerned about eating “chemicals,” which are framed as “unnatural” — though obviously, everything has chemicals. It doesn’t really make sense. But you also understand what people mean: Eat an apple, not a bag of Doritos.

Alan Levinovitz

People may not understand lots of traditional food production methods, but they feel like they understand them. They feel like they know how an apple tree grows, even if they don’t actually know how industrial apple farms work.

That’s a very different process than, say, steam-cracking petrochemicals and turning those into apple flavor. It may be the case that “apple flavor” is a chemical in the same way that “the juice from an apple from an apple tree” is a chemical, but what people mean when they say “I don’t want chemicals in my food” is “I don’t want substances that are produced through methods that are fundamentally alien to me and relatively recent and therefore not time-tested in my food.”

What people mean when they say “I don’t want chemicals in my food” is “I don’t want substances that are produced through methods that are fundamentally alien to me and relatively recent and therefore not time-tested in my food”

Rachel Sugar

The FDA has yet to offer a definition of “natural,” which makes sense, because it sounds like you’re saying it’s just really, really hard to define.

Alan Levinovitz

It’s impossible. As a term, it’s as difficult to define as “God” or “good.”

Rachel Sugar

But they keep opening up the question for public comment, right?

Alan Levinovitz

Yeah, I’ve gone through the comments. I wrote a piece for NPR about the meaning of “natural,” and I went through a ton of these comments. There were some explicit references to God — what’s natural is what God meant for us to eat. The idea being that there are these systems that aren’t human-created, they’re created by God, and those produce certain kinds of foods. Those are the foods that we’re meant to consume.

Rachel Sugar

What do you see as driving the current obsession with natural food?

Alan Levinovitz

I think right now, we — and when I say “we,” I mean likely readers of a Vox piece — are very conscious of the bad effects that humans are having on the world. We’re conscious of climate change. We’re conscious of deforestation. We’re conscious of the evil of industrial agriculture.

That is a moral impurity that we feel acutely and that’s also very difficult to transcend. We’re part of these systems. What are you going to do? At the end of the day, you just have to buy your food. You’re part of this food system. That makes us feel guilty. That’s a kind of impurity, and the way we transcend that is through seeking out that which is natural, because what is natural, at least in theory, is what wouldn’t harm the environment. If it’s the way it was meant to be, then it isn’t caused by us and therefore isn’t out fault. So there’s a way in which buying “natural” outsources agency to nature, and if you’re buying things that are created by nature, it can’t be your fault if they’re bad.

It’s a symbolic way to remove ourselves from a system that we feel is deeply flawed. There’s a kind of ancient magical formula, “you are what you eat,” and when you eat things that are created in a system that is bad for the world, there’s also a sense that they’re bad for you. And that comes out of a whole different set of anxieties: this idea that ultra-processed foods are making us sick and that we’re overeating; we’ve got all these allergies, and who knows where they’re coming from? Our microbiomes are all messed up. And so again, the solution to a suite of very complicated problems becomes just eating the way you’re meant to eat, a.k.a. eating natural foods.

Rachel Sugar

In the piece you wrote recently for the Washington Post, you suggest that buying natural products is “the modern equivalent of buying indulgences.” That if we buy unprocessed grains ethically harvested, we can absolve our guilt about our role in the food system.

Alan Levinovitz

Yeah, I think that we do that. I mean, certainly I try to do it. The ubiquity of something like fair trade is the sense that we’re at the top of a food system that is exploitative, so how do we get out of that? Well, we pay a little bit more for the fair trade chocolate, and then we feel better about it.

Rachel Sugar

Is that bad?

Alan Levinovitz

That’s good. It’s good in the same way that indulgences were good, which is that if you cared about the church you would want to fund it. In that sense, buying fair trade or buying sustainably sourced food or ethically produced meat at Whole Foods — whatever it is you’re spending extra money on — I think in principle, isn’t a bad thing. But like indulgences, I think there’s the illusion that somehow that’s all you need. That’s it. The system is fixed, you can just buy your way to fixing the system.

I’m deeply suspicious of that impulse. While I’m sympathetic with the people that think advocating for natural stuff is silly and that industrial agriculture feeds lots of people and despite lots of mistakes things are slowly getting better and there are fewer people who are starving, etc. etc, I think all of that is true, but I’m also very suspicious when those same people say, “and so all we have to do is just keep buying things and if we buy the right things than eventually everything will be fixed.”

It’s a symbolic way to remove ourselves from a system that we feel is deeply flawed

Rachel Sugar

So what should we do with all this? It sounds like, on the one hand, it’s not irrational for people to eat food they understand. On the other, a lot of food innovations that seem like they might address a lot of global problems — climate change, hunger — are complicated. Lab-grown meat is hard to understand. GMOs are hard to understand. How should we think about the value of “natural”?

Alan Levinovitz

I think in the case of “natural” or “nature,” we need to think about what we mean by those terms, and then start saying what we mean instead of hiding it behind the term.

I think we all need to do this initial foundational work defining what it is that we value and what we mean when we say we want to protect nature, or we want to eat natural foods. We need to think about why we want those things, and try to articulate that clearly ourselves so that we can eventually adjudicate decisions between different communities and different individuals about what we’re going to eat or how we’re going to treat the world using shared terms that are clear instead of vaguely theistic.

But you also want certain kinds of foods to be available to you at all times. That’s an aesthetic preference that doesn’t line up with what’s natural, and you’re going to have to balance those, the same way we want to be free, but we also don’t want to be completely free — we get into relationships. I think that we need to isolate the value of what’s natural, detach it from a kind of deified nature, and then think about what it is that we value about it, and how we can measure that against other things that we also value.

Then you start to imagine a world in which you have natural and unnatural things existing side by side, in a way that you have beautiful things and efficient things that aren’t so beautiful existing side by side. The reality of it is as humans and always will live in a balance of natural and unnatural.

I think because of where we are technologically and the size of our population, those questions are really pressing. I don’t think simplistic understandings of what’s natural are helpful when we are trying to address them.

Original Source -> Why “natural” food has become a secular stand-in for goodness and purity

via The Conservative Brief

[queen0funova]

[Image ID: Tumblr tags. They read,

#pokemon #clai's art

#i love when things are super serious and then suddenly arent. Its my favorite bit

#BUT ALSO. I come back with more klink thoughts

#you mentioned how it would have been nice for the pokemon that signified n's turning point to be a friendship evo

#and like yeah i think it would have been nice for him to have one i even have my own post on the matter

#but tbh. klink is THE perfect one to represent it, like its driving me up a wall. i think it might fit n more than zorua does

#the thing with n is he is horrifically bad at friendships, he pushes all his pokemon away by releasing them

#he keeps saying he wants to be friends with the protag all throughout bwl but doesnt give them a way to contact him when he leaves

#he's gone for Two Years without reconnecting

#my point being. a friendship evo actually wouldnt do him any good during bwl, he's fresh out of isolation he hasn't learned to process it

#what n does do? he processes the world through formulas. makes sense of everything around him with numbers

#klink is a pokemon that cannot function unless its in a pair. it has the abilities plus and minus which only activate when-

#--another pokemon with those abilities, all rooted in very basic scientific terms, can't make a gear turn without a second ane

#maria also points out its a ferris wheel reference. "The circular motion... The mechanics... [...]collections of elegant formulas™

#what i'm saying is n needed that concept of togetherness explained in a way He understood

#n thinks linearly, there has to be one solution to everything. It has to be neatly explained in a formula

#friendships are complex and theres no Correct way to make and be friends

#he just needed a kickstart idea presented in familiar terms. klink is exactly that

#in addition like klink being an objectmon and n seen as Inhuman? literally perfect. n connecting with something that might on the surface--

#--look unfeeling and cold. but klink is all about connections and so is n

#i hope that makes sense. its very late i might be rambling too much VJEVDJEVJED

#sorry for putting a serious analysis in the tags of a Funny Comic. I am severely ill about black and white you must understand

/End ID]

Do you ever think about how almost all of N’s Pokémon throughout the first games were one offs he released after he battled you, how he cared about them all deeply enough that he thought it would be selfish to have them battle more than necessary. And do you ever think about how this is the case with all his Pokémon EXCEPT his Klinklang in the final battle at the league, where the second to last battle he had a Klink and this Klinklang is very likely that same Pokémon? Do you think this was a visual representation of his mindset wavering from a fixed point? How that Klink refused to leave him right away and he couldn’t bring himself to force them to leave because his mind is in so many different directions? He can keep them around just a little longer until he becomes champion, it won’t be long, he can bend things some so long as he doesn’t fully stray from his path…right?

Or is that just me am I the only one willing to be insane about Klinklang of all Pokémon