#when i posted this on twitter though it was like... a few days after ep 11? ive always had the thought circling about vash deserving of

[ruporas]

asking and receiving (bonus below readmore)

[ID: A black and white, digital Trigun comic of Vash and Wolfwood. In the first panel is a close up of Wolfwood's mouth as he says, "Vash". Accompanying it is a close up shot of Vash's eye, widen and cheeks flushed. Wolfwood presses a knee against the open space between Vash's legs and says, "Tell me everything you want from me." Wolfwood's face is equally as flushed. He continues to say, "I'll give it to you. Everything." As he talks, a wide shot shows the both of them in white space. Vash is sitting, leaning a little back with both hands pressed against the surface he's sitting on. Wolfwood is in his white dress shirt, stripped of the blazer. He's still leaning in with one knee in between Vash's spread legs, his right hand touching Vash's lips and his left hand behind his back.

The shot closes in on Vash's mouth and Wolfwood's hand against it, pressing down on the lower lip as he says, "You have to ask though. Go on." His hand moves down to Vash's chin, gently holding it. With a shy and uncertain expression, Vash hesitantly asks, "Um... K... Kiss... Please?" Wolfwood, without wasting a second, leans in and kisses him and indulges by pressing deeper, eliciting a small noise of surprise from Vash.

Wolfwood moves away from Vash first and with a smile, asks, "What else?" Vash tugs on Wolfwood's left sleeve, wordlessly budging Wolfwood to give him his hand that was still behind his back. In the next panel, Vash utters, "Hold me..?" He's holding Wolfwood's left hand with his own while his right hand is reaching for his waist. Wolfwood complies, moving his left hand to Vash's shoulder and his right hand continues to touch Vash's cheek. Wolfwood asks again, "What else?"

More comfortable now, Vash leans in to kiss Wolfwood. Wolfwood catches him immediately, pressing his thumb against Vash's lips to stop him before demanding, "Hey. Ask." Vash looks back in surprise and Wolfwood meets his eye with a quiet, insistent look. They're quiet for a moment before Vash leans in again and curtly requests, "Kiss. Me." Wolfwood says "Good", smiling as he lifts his hand away, and meets Vash's lips. In the next shot, Wolfwood had adjusted his position, sitting on Vash's thigh. The hand that was once on Vash's cheek has moved its way to Vash's nape, pushing away the collar of his jacket with his pinky. His other hand continues to grip on Vash's shoulder. Still kissing, Wolfwood asks again, "What else?"

In the next shot, Vash is starting to turn, moving Wolfwood with him. Vash asks, "Let me on top of you?" Wolfwood says, "Mhm" before asking again, "What else?" The next panel shows a close look of Vash's face. He's looking down, flushed and shy just as he had been at the beginning, but now, more decisive. Vash asks, "Wolfwood... Let me have you..?" A panel of Wolfwood taking Vash's hand into his, pulling it towards his chest. The next panel shows Wolfwood lying down where Vash had laid him. Vash's hand is on Wolfwood's chest, covering the cross of his rosary while Wolfwood's hand lingers against his, loosely pressing Vash's hand in place. He looks up at Vash with a shy smile of his own, flushed cheeks. He says, "All yours."

A panel shows a close up of Vash's tender gaze before he leans down to be closer to Wolfwood. The final shot is a front view of their positions, Vash's face turned away from the viewer; Vash is leaning over Wolfwood who's lying down with his right leg draped over Vash's legs. Wolfwood's left hand holds onto Vash's left arm. With finality, Vash says, "...Mine." End ID]

[ID: A follow up bonus comic in a looser, sketchier style. They're laying comfortably in bed when Vash asks, "What was that earlier?" referecing to the start of the previous comic. Wolfwood glances away and says, "To get you used to it. Asking. And getting what you ask for. Since you're alwasy hesitant about it." Vash's eyes widen, tight lipped. Wolfwood continues, "Knowing you, it'll be a tough habit to break..." When he says this, Vash can't help but laugh, unable to deny it. Wolfwood slowly brings a hand to Vash's cheek and continues to say, "So I'll keep trying -- whatever ways I can... to get it through your thick skull." Vash takes Wolfwood's hand with his, kissing the the palm gently. Wolfwood's eyes soften and holding onto Vash's cheek, he leans in to try for a kiss. Vash says, "Hey..." before stopping Wolfwood's lips with the back of his hand, a smug look on his face, "Ask." Wolfwood's embarrassed and with little irritation, asks, "Really?" Vash smiles, saying, "You're in need of practice too." They pause for a moment, Wolfwood looking contemplatively, before he's leaning in again, asking, "May I please kiss you?" Vash looks him in the eyes and says, "Yes." The comic ends with a "chu", indicating an off-panel kiss. End ID]

[notfreetoday]

MPW Ep 2 Subtitle Corrections

Subtitle Corrections: Ep 1 here

Cultural/Language Tidbits: Ep 2 here

Same translation disclaimer applies. Thanks to everyone reading the first post and geeking out with me in the notes, I really appreciate it XD Ok, Ep 2, let's go! Sorry in advance for the length!

If you're wondering why Yoh's freaking out about the rainy season even though they've been together for 3 years, the manga artist posted a clarification on twitter:

By the way, “it’s been 3 years since then” – that phrase refers to it being 3 years since that conversation regarding the slave contract. As for living together, they’ve only just started (to do so) around Mar/April*, so (at this point) it’s only been a few months (for them). What if (I) got it wrong…. I remember making a note of it, but the file that I wrote it in and passed over (to the crew) couldn’t be found right, so… (was it) a dream?” *Japan's rainy season comes around June/July, so this means that this is the first rainy season these two have been experienced together.

[Y: まずっ] Y: Tastes bad In case the original "that sucks" sounds like Yoh might be talking about the news of the young forecaster - he's really just talking about the food here.

[S: 遅くなるからいらねぇっつっただろう] Original: I told you not to bother since I returned late Mine: I told you I wouldn't need it cause I'd be late right? This is actually a pretty harsh sounding line tbh. It's sort of inkeeping with Segasaki's curtness, but still pretty harsh - so this tells us he's tired after a long day, and explains the frown on his face that Yoh just wipes away with his cuteness

Nikujaga literally means meat and potatoes. It's a stewed dish and a very well-loved comfort food. Super easy to make too (link goes to an easy to follow recipe, and the site also explains a little about the dish).

[Y: 本当、顔だけはいいよな] Y: Really, it's only his face that looks good.

I've talked about this in my cultural/language tidbits for this episode (linked up top) but I'll add it here for completion's sake

[Y: あ、いや。なんでもない…です*] (Ah, iya, nandemonai…desu*) Y: Ah, no, it's….nothing* Yoh let's his sentence trail off before tacking on a "desu" at the end. "Desu" is an ending verb characteristic of "polite" speech, which Yoh doesn't use frequently with Segasaki (in fact, by this point, he has not used polite speech with Segasaki at all, except for maybe saying the full form of the word "welcome home", and even that's pushing it). Here he adds it at the end as an afterthought (the polite form of "iya" would be "iie", if he had wanted the whole sentence to be polite from the get go), which tells us that Yoh's feeling a little off-kilter here, and does introduce the slightest distance between him and Segasaki. We'll see this distance increase as the episode goes on.

[Y: いや、どう考えても食べ過ぎだろう] Y: No but, no matter which way you look at it, (he's) eaten way too much hasn't he? Btw, if your hair started standing at the spoon scraping the pot - in the manga artist's post about visiting the shooting venue (as well as during Ep 1 twitter space) it was mentioned that Mashiko, the actor, can actually cook, so during filming they had to tell him what someone who can't would likely do, and also asked him to do the housework poorly (because Yoh's not supposed to be good at cooking or housework hahaha)

この人*、明日も朝早いんだよな。たぶん。 Original: This guy, has an early morning again tomorrow. Probably. Mine: This person*, has (to leave) early tomorrow morning too. Probably. *The word here is "kono hito", literally "this person". There's actually nothing wrong with the translation "this guy" tbh because that's a fairly neutral term in English, but I'm highlighting it here because in his monologues, Yoh usually refers to Segasaki using much rougher language, such as "koitsu, aitsu", except when he addresses Segasaki directly in his head. I'll talk more about how Yoh addresses Segasaki in the analysis post, but for now - this sentence hints that Yoh has clocked Segasaki's tiredness (subconsciously or not) and is feeling a little bad for him. Then again he quickly hides that by adding on "probably". (Adding the word "probably" behind your sentence is a common way to express doubt/negate what you just said, and incidentally is commonly used by comedians to deliver a punchline).

[Y: あの*…あの…寝るなら部屋でとおもって。] Original: Um… Hey… You should go back to your room. Mine: Um*... Um... if you're going to sleep then, (it would be better to sleep) in your room - at least that's what I thought...

*"あの…" (ano…), translated as "um" here, is a common sound you use when you want to get someone's attention but don't want to sound too demanding - it actually isn't being polite per se, but it does show the hesitancy with which Yoh approaches him. Contrast this with the way Segasaki gets Yoh's attention (so far it's just been "Yoh" or "Oi" - the latter of which you would NOT use unless you were close to the person, or looking for a fight).

As a general rule of thumb, the level of politeness in Japanese is directly correlated with the length of the sentence and just how far you can beat around the bush. So, Yoh's suggestion that Segasaki goes to sleep in his room is literally just "if sleeping, then room..." and everything else in that translation is assumed. He may not being using polite speech forms here (that would be "to omoimashita" instead of "to omotte") but this is still a common way to be polite because he's making a suggestion that is so mild Segasaki can choose to ignore it. This is a great example of Brown & Levinson's "negative politeness" which we'll revisit when analysing their speech patterns, and which you can read about in entirely too much detail here (free to read).

[Y: じゅあ、俺は寝るので** あの、その、そういうことで、おやすみ] Original: Then, I’ll go to sleep. That…sort of thing. Good night. Mine: So then, I'm going to bed, therefore**... Um... that... with that... night!

"Therefore" is an awkward translation for the word ので (node), which is more often translated as "so". I've chosen to use that word because "node", whilst again not a polite form per se, is less colloquial than the more commonly used "から(kara)", to mean the same thing. It tends to pop up more in writing than in speech. "Therefore" doesn't make a sentence polite/formal in English, but it's definitely less colloquial than using the word "so". The use of "node" is just that tiny bit out of place in this sentence paired with the informal pronoun "ore" for "I" as opposed to the more formal choice of "boku".

Again, Yoh answers Segasaki properly here with a "はい (hai)" as opposed to his usual "un" (which is a sound that expresses agreement), when told that Segasaki will be late again. There actually aren't very many moments where Yoh does speak politely to Segasaki (he's definitely rude when he talks about Segasaki in his head hahaha), so these moments stand out. This whole short exchange, together with the random -desu he added earlier, just make Yoh's sentences a little more stilted/awkward, and more distant. Individually they don't deserve much mention at all, but together, and in the context of his jealousy, show just how unsure Yoh is about where he stands with Segasaki.

[Y: あの人の帰宅が遅くなり] Y: That person returned home later and later

"That person" - similar to the above usage of "this person". This sentence is incomplete - the verb form of the last word - 遅くなり (osokunari) indicates that there should be a second part to the sentence (the "completed" form would be osokunatta). But after he says this, there is a pregnant pause, as Yoh puts his phone down and continues cooking alone. The pause continues all the way into the next scene, before the sentence continues, highlighting the loneliness that Yoh feels.

[Y: 当然、触れられることもないままに] Original: Of course, he did not touch me at all Mine: (and) of course, (I) remained untouched (by him) as well

The literal translation for this would be "(the situation in which I) was not touched (by him) continued on as well". Yoh uses the passive form of the word "touch", which places the emphasis on Yoh "receiving" the action of being touched as opposed to placing the emphasis on Segasaki "carrying out" the action of touching Yoh. Consider the difference between the sentences "I was hurt by him" and "he hurt me". The former is the passive form, and is super common in Jp, much less common in Eng. If this is confusing - welcome to Jp grammar just know that the emphasis of this line is more on what Yoh does not have, rather than what Segasaki has not done. It accentuates Yoh's feelings of emptiness and loss.

Y: すっかり日々は過ぎて Y: The days pass by completely ...

Similarly, this sentence is "incomplete", and is instead continued by Segasaki walking in and telling Yoh he'll be late again. (This whole bit just hurts my soul tbh, Yoh is so lonely. )

This is a teruteru bouzu aka a charm of sorts for good weather. See the cultural tidbits post for Ep 2 linked up top for more info!

This is said really strongly, and gives the "what the hell are you doing" feel. Yoh's truly upset here.

I try not to care about some of the subs in these side conversations because they don't add much to the main story and these posts are already too long, but this sentence should really be "Dammit, maybe I should (go) troll the chat" (and the previous sentence should be "If this was broadcasted in a certain country it would be instant death" aka N.Korea ^^;) and I just think it was a nice touch to hint at the fandom wars/flaming that goes on between fans hahaha

[Y: しんどい] Y: This is too draining The word here used is "shindoi", which is a term used when you're feeling mentally/physically exhausted/drained, and carries a sense of frustration (at feeling this way) and sometimes (emotional) pain.

This. Is. Huge. Segasaki does 2 things here - one, he rejects an after-work meal, which you rarely do because Japan is all about the group and rejecting a group invite, to welcome a new member, can make you seem like you aren't a team player - two, the guy who invites him is his senior, which you can tell because Segasaki sticks to polite speech forms whilst the other guy does not. It's still relatively casual, so you can tell he's got a good working relationship with them (probably why he's not worried about rejecting them) but still. In Segasaki's world, Yoh is the No. 1 priority.

This is more accurately "WTF". There are many sounds in Japanese that aren't exactly words, but carry a lot of meaning - "Haa?!" is one of them, and is a very rude way to express a lot of anger and shock. Please, never say this in real life. You will royally piss off whoever it's directed at and if you are outside a Shibuya bar you will get punched.

The word used here is てめぇ (temee), which is a really rude way to say "you", and has the same energy as "you bastard". Segasaki usually uses the informal pronoun "omae" for "you" when he talks to Yoh, he's definitely pissed off here.

This is the same word, "shindoi" again.

I'm going to put the rest of the whole argument here with just my translation because it's too long to screencap the whole thing.

[S: 何なんだよ？このエロい惨状は Y: うるさい。 Y: 俺は売れっ子エロ漫画家になるんだ S: なんだそりゃ。おい *takes away beer can* Y: 売れっ子さんが　シコリながらネーム描くと　いいのができるって言ってた S: なんも描けてなかったぞ。 S: おい、だめだっつってんの S: 飲みすぎ　出すもん出して　寝てただけだろう Y: 黙れ！ Y: 俺はエロくて　抜ける漫画描いて　いっぱい稼いで Y: 早く　こんなとこ出ていくんだ S: はあ？　おい、お前　どういうつもりだよ Y: どうもこうもないよ！ Y: 平気で抱かれてると思うなよ 。 Y: 俺のこと、好きでもないくせに Y: 便利な奴隷としか思ってないんだろう？そんなにやりたきゃ隣のキャスターとやってろよ S: お前　さっきから　何を... Y: 俺はあんな風に笑いかけられたことない]

Breakdown: S: What's up with this? This lewd disaster of a scene Y: (You're) annoying! ["うるさい (urusai)" is often translated as "shut up", but it literally means someone is being "noisy", and here is more of a complaint that Segasaki is being bothersome] Y: I'm going to become a hot-selling erotica manga artist! [the word used here is 売れっ子 (urekko), which literally means "someone who gets huge sales" and mostly refers to idols, entertainers, TV personalities etc. So Yoh is not just saying he's going to become popular, he's saying he's gonna be like a celebrity manga artist, which is why Segasaki snorts a little at this] S: What's with that? Hey. *takes away beer can* Y: The hot sellers say that if you jerk off whilst drawing your storyboard, you'll come up with good stuff [urekko-san is a pretty cute way of referring to these popular artists] S: You've not drawn anything, you know? [this is said with a really indulgent air, which contrasts directly with the more authoritative tone of the next line] S: Hey, I'm telling you no more *grabs beer can* S: You drank too much. You just shot what you shot and then went to sleep didn't you? [And this is back to an indulgent tone - also, everyone knows Segasaki is talking about cumming here, he just doesn't actually say it so directly] Y: Shut up! ["黙れ (damare) - contrast with "urusai" earlier. The former is used much less commonly and really does mean to "be quiet". This is why Segasaki pauses and looks at Yoh. Up until now Segasaki just thinks Yoh's gotten drunk and is whining cutely, but this word means things are serious.] Y: I'm going to draw manga that is erotic, that you can wank off to, and then earn lots of money [this is a call back to the conversation with Man-san over the phone in Ep 1, which I did not include earlier because I didn't think it was important to the story when Yoh says "the work that was released last month was amazing! There was a big buzz around the topic "I can't wank off (to this)" - Yoh was being sarcastic here, meaning that he got reviews that his work wasn't erotic enough] Y: and leave this sort of place soon! S: What? Hey - what (the hell) are you thinking? [Again, "haa?" here shows he does NOT like what Yoh's saying, but he does soften the end of the sentence with a "yo"] Y: I'm not thinking of anything! Y: Embracing me so easily - don't think you can (keep on) doing that [again, this is the passive form, so the emphasis is on Yoh being embraced, and here has the nuance of "don't think I'll just (keep on) being fine with being embraced (by you) like it's some sort of norm"] Y: when you don't even like me [this line has quite a bit of bitterness in it - the emphasis here is strongly on Segasaki and his apparent "non-liking" of Yoh my english is dying.] Y: You think of me as just a convenient slave, don't you? Y: If you want to do it that much, go do it with that forecaster next to you! S: You... from the start... what have (you been saying?) Y: I have never been smiled at like that before [again, this is in passive voice]

It's obvious from the acting alone that this entire argument is pretty emotionally charged - this is also reflected in the language because Yoh uses the pronoun "ore (I)" a lot. Pronouns are frequently dropped in Japanese - often you can go an entire conversation without ever uttering the words "I/me" or "you", in part because the pronouns are assumed and also because emphasis on an individual can come across as too selfish/narcissistic or direct. Segasaki uses them often enough with Yoh, which fits his personality, but Yoh normally doesn't. So, when he uses "ore" here it stands out - his plans to be successful and leave, his feelings, his interpretation of Segasaki's actions - all of the emphasis is on his own self. The message is very clear - Yoh is hurting a lot more than he is blaming or accusing Segasaki.

[Y: もう疲れた。あんたといると疲れる。嫌いだ S: お前　酒入るとめちゃくちゃしゃべるんだな Y: ねぇ、何で雨の時はだめなの？ S: はあ？　だって、お前が言ったんだろう] Y: (I'm) tired out. When (I'm) with you, (I) get tired. Hate it. [We've lost the "I" pronouns here, because the emphasis is on the extreme sense of physical and emotional fatigue as opposed to Yoh himself, and on how much he dislikes that feeling. Of note, "hate" here is closer to "detest/really dislike" - the word is "kirai" - which is not as strong as the word "nikui" which we talked about in Ep 1 when Yoh said he hated the part of him that always listened to Segasaki. Also, this is the first time Yoh has addressed Segasaki with the pronoun "you" out loud - he uses "あんた anta", which he also used in his head in Ep 1, after they did it. Again, we'll talk about this in the analysis post in the future, but for now just know that this term is usually used between older couples.] S: You... once you start drinking you really start talking huh? [literally, you "become able to talk"] Y: Hey...why is it when it rains, (we) can't do it? S: What? Because, you said so didn't you? [the last "haa?" from Segasaki! This time expressing his surprise and slight indignation.]

[S: 俺は優しいんだ] S: I. am. Kind. Great example of Segasaki's use of the "ore" pronoun here to quite literally emphasise how great he is. "優しい (kind)" in Japanese carries the connotation of being thoughtful, anticipating the other person's needs and wants and then meeting them etc. It's a characteristic that people often say they look for in their potential partners.

[S: そもそも、なんだ先の言いぐさは 好きじゃないだの　出ていきたいだの お前　俺のプロポーズを受けといてよくそんなことが言えんな S: 養ってやる*っつってんだ　プロポーズ以外になに] S: In the first place, what was with those things you said earlier? That you don't like me, that you want to leave... You... that was rich, saying all that after accepting my proposal. S: I was saying I'd provide and care* for you. If that's not a proposal than what is? ["養ってやる" is a pretty possessive way to say I'll provide for you - it's the same word used when referring to parent providing for a child, or an owner providing for a small animal. It's not rude per se, but it does imply a power imbalance. Segasaki actually sort of has a point here because... this is not something you say to someone else unless you're in a relationship ^^;]

S: ていうかお前、俺のこと嫌いなんだ S: どうなの S: Actually about that... so you hate me huh? S: Which is it?

S: ふーん。あ、そ S: Ohh..? I see. ふーん (Ohh..?) - Segasaki says this a lot, especially in this episode. This is another one of those sounds that isn't a word but carries a lot of meaning. It has a dismissive sort of tone to it, like you've already assumed something or when you're pretty nonchalant/not impressed about whatever the other person has said and are just playing along with them by giving them some attention (so again, if you use it wrongly, it can piss people off). Segasaki uses it whenever Yoh goes mute or shy, as a way to tease Yoh - though Yoh seems to think Segasaki is dismissing/not interested in his answer. あ、そ (A, so) - again, Segasaki says this a lot - can be interpreted as "oh really?/I see/is that so?" - Combined with the above, you can see why Yoh often thinks Segasaki isn't interested in his answer, and even when he does recognise it as teasing, he gets too flustered to do anything about it.

This seems to have gotten longer, if you reached the end - congratulations! I hope this makes it a little clearer why it's so obvious to us as the viewer that Segasaki is really quite patient with Yoh, and is waiting for him to come to terms with his feelings, but at the same time so confusing for Yoh, because of the way many of these interactions can be read both ways. In Ep 3, we'll really be able to get into their dynamics because they've got so much more interaction together.

[iwsynttr-project]

WAAAHHH I just saw people have been posting about the project on Pinterest???

THANK YOU???

I am so pink oh my goodness aaa

I'll give some updates then so people know we're not just slackin', haha;;

This past week we've been hella busy with church, school, trying out programs, still figuring out the whole learning to drive thing, stuff with disability, etc... but especially with Valentine's Day & Moose's birthday.

CJ came up to visit which was really special & we got to eat out & get boba all together which was super nice as he doesn't live too close by ever since we moved a few years back.

I recently got most of my m3dz figured out so I might be able to start hrt within the next year, & it sounds like the date has been set for CJ & I to get married this April 29th!

On top of all this we recently found out that a couple other plans have been thrown into the mix:

Our folks are planning to head out for a week a few states away to spend time with family & celebrate our twin cousins' birthday & then they'll be goin to Medieval Times for Moose's birthday possibly with another friend or cousin.

My mom & I are gonna try & see a show with CJ & his mom if they're able to come for my 21st birthday (Which is March 13th!) & CJ's birthday is at the start of April.

Right before our wedding is my dad's birthday & we're gonna see another live performance in another state, & then right afterwards a few days later is gonna be the wedding.

We're just gonna make it small & Soukoku themed, but maybe years later from now when we're livin' alone & financially stable we might do a bigger more official wedding. We'll renew our vows, maybe have custom made suits, special stuff like that.

Somethin' we're hopin' to do is for the small one we might make custom Lego Minifigures to be in front of/above the cake & then if we save up... the four-six hundred bucks... we wanna get the Soukoku "wedding" figurines that came out a bit ago.

It's a dream.

Anyways, as for the actual project!

I'm still working on the script when I have time, I just got stumped since we don't have Golden Demon written yet- but I managed to come up with some content to fill in for during or after the scene plays out for now & continued from there.

Moose has decided to try & make two versions of Life's Better With A Little Party In It: one that's a trashy pop song, & one that's his own take on the song based on artists like YOASOBI. (Into the Night, Monster, Idol, etc...)

We're also thinking about making a Cover Album on the side to go with the soundtrack just for fun with covers of songs from bands & artists like ONE OK ROCK & Set It Off.

I'm still thinking I might go for making The I Was Screaming Your Name Through the Radio Project into an episodic animatic series, but with everything going on I might wait to record the actual script & songs until we've got most of the script & songs written out more at the least if not also until after I get a better microphone & possibly start injections. (Maybe I'll still do the first few chapters since they're just teens anyways but meh whatever; we'll see.)

I did do a drawing while I was free last night though & have been talking with my dad who's voice is basically his life & career about vocal training of sorts or if I should find classes online or something along those lines for it.

(Back to the drawing) I made a concept design for Moose's online/music persona AquaticSnow & a possible first EP/Album cover. I'm not sure I'll post it (yet?) since he might use it for stuff like his avatar, channel/s, music, etc but if I do it'll be on my personal main Tumblr, Instagram, & probably Deviantart & Twitter/X.

I'm also nervous about somebody tryin' to steal the art &/or concept.

Another reminder that I do have a personal server where I stream drawing, gaming, sometimes reading & writing, watch parties (movies, shows, etc...) & I post planning & updates for the project there!

.:Charli's Discord Server:.

( Don't forget to pick roles & read the rules! Otherwise you can't see the other chats;; )

Sorry 'bout the long post, haha;; we hope you all had a great Valentine's Day!

Charli

[peacereturnedtothevalley]

My tumblr and online life history. If you even care (it’s long and rambling I’m bored on a plane)

[pretend there is a read more button here and just keep scrolling]

I got a tumblr summer of 2011 bc my brother kept showing me #fresh memes and around that time my online activity was scrolling endlessly though canihazcheeseburger network of meme sites. I was 17 so lol 12 years…

it started with memes and fandom type gifsets (and following some irls) but after a year or so I completely entered my #sjw era and nothing a decade ago is perfect but I’m always vaguely thankful for tumblr putting me in that direction

in 2015 I got frustrated and locked myself out of my account on purpose and then could not reverse it the next day because I changed the email to an email yahoo decided to delete lol.

I made a new account soon after but exclusively for following and reblogging steven universe stuff but I ended up becoming more and more general again after a few months… I remember so much mess and drama but I also never directly talked to any of those people so it was just a one person stomach ache time

Got really into taz in my last quarter of college in the summer (monster factory a few months before) and this was what made me start a twitter in 2016… I never talked to people directly online before as much except a handful of mutuals (hi if you’re still on here) so slowly joining in that was fun! Also messy I saw all of the highs and lows of taz fandom, made and lost friends (mostly from the periphery of a group but a handful of direct breaks lol) and in that actual play space I had friends get into friends at the table… I listened to a few eps of counter/weight and could Not keep it going so when twilight mirage was starting it was a good opportunity to follow along instead of a backlog. Also finally realized I was slowly iv rating to tweeting full time rip

Also 2017 I made a few fatt friends but I was scared to talk to the fandom bc I still liked taz a lot and fatt fans you know how we are (I too am like that now) but anyways I had like 10 followers to my name and nothing to lose so I started posting more in 2018 and I have gained lifelong friends in the fandom since :’) I feel like twilight mirage was such a contentious era so I got really close with my #tmstan friends and all the stress of that time is a memory now….

I did listen to almost every season eventually but I did fall off of keeping up with fatt 2021/2022 I think (so sorry sangfielle)

unexpected side plot of my life is loona and kpop in general. I was vaguely into loona from seeing stuff on tumblr in 2018 and something clicked for me with the butterfly comeback in 2019, as in it was the first time I was watching performances on music shows and it was really cool to me and I also had no idea what was going to happen to me (the great 2019 loona hiatus) and I slowly was starting to follow kpop liking accounts outside of a handful of tumblr people I followed on twitter and unfortunately the hiatus made me check out other groups and I love the music (loved…? It’s still good when it’s good but it’s not always good) and understood too much about the minutia behind the industry but I also made more lifelong friends (I hope? Hi carbs)

Kpop era coincides with my not listening to sangfielle era but I think my attention span was shot and all I wanted to do was fill my head with music…

Wait okay I had also a career change (don’t worry about that) and also got really into final fantasy xiv. So that’s another era of my life that is neither fatt or kpop. I was gaming so much and I love my cat girl and my catboy wife. I started right before endwalker dropped and now I’m too caught up but I was solidly playing for 2 years straight. I’m playing Zelda for now but I’m almost done

Okay anyways fatt season palisade started up earlier this year and my fatt era is back in full swing. Went to a fatt friends’ wedding this april. Palisade is really good every week. And now twitter is dying so I have returned to Blog for Real. I’ll post my cohost hear if I end up there more lol

[coralsgrimes]

Someone posted a whole video of his album party: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nzlhDV0PaR8&source_ve_path=MTc4NDI0

There was no way I was listening to his screeching, but I skimmed through the talking parts. It gets worse the more you hear. Also he’s already changing his story/lying about some of the songs again

1) Apparently now he’s into Japanese culture. The theme for the album is the various stages in relationships, but also kintsugi pottery. Breaking something apart (read himself) and building it back into something more precious. He got the Narnia makeup artist to turn him into kintsugi for the album cover for the title song Where the Light Gets In.

2) He’s now changed the story (lied) about Nevermind from being about heartbreak, to now claiming he wrote it with (Kevin???) during the pandemic about anxiety.

3) Stolen Time is where it gets interesting, cause he insinuated he was involved with someone when S&B season 2 started filming. The song is about time and distance and the world (pandemic) keeping people apart, but about two people in different time zones trying to connect to each other. He said he was miserable and “missing someone”, but also said Calahan wrote part of the song. Calahan was actually going through a break up at the time, so how much of the song is about him??? And Benny was just a pining loser. Also, wasn’t that winter when Jules was dating that Charlie guy.

4) He also pathetically shouted out the Save the Crows Netflix petition. Also there is a sex song. Eww

5) The Three New Hearts song about getting his heart broken three times (Jules?) is his favorite

6)Someone said he had a song about telling someone he wouldn’t wait for them Someday, but it’s apparently it’s about bastardizing Dylan Thomas’s poetry. Which is somehow worse. He brought up the English degree though, because he will never let people forget

FIRST OF ALL! thank ye for your sacrifice muffin, here's a potato for ye 🥔🥔🥔

And here's the link

1) Kintsugi? Where the Light Gets In (Let the Light In much lol)? Me thinks someone got himself Did You Know That There's a Tunnel Under Ocean Blvd on vinyl xd

2) So the shitty lyrics were actually group attempt? Even worse lol

3) WHAT YE MEAN SOMEONE IN DIFFERENT TIME ZONE WHEN HE WAS IN HUNGARY? But the twitter girlies told me he was sharing same hotel room with Jessie? Valentines day hotel backpack 2 years anniversary soon x.x ANYWAY if I remember well, twin flame and the spiritual healing tongue guy were together like late 2021 like a few weeks after the EP premiere when he was in Canada?? and then he was in Hungary from January till like almost summer? And I remember something about gym bros and some trips they took cuz Calahan was big sad yesssss

4) Can't figure out why ye put these two in one lol maybe cuz he a paid whore? And now he thinks he can do like sweet gentleman lil puppy's version of AC/DC's The Jack?

5) Only three times? I would say we can count more bulianne break ups buuuuuuuut maybe it's because of the three big pap outings? the pandemic stroll with hubby away, the Montana/ice cream date, and then the NY birthday week?

6) Have nothing of substance to say actually lol he should have go for William McGonagall for shits and giggles

[iamnotbored]

To My Star 2: a love letter to all the jiwoos out there...

Its been years since a show have made me feel this way, but i will start by saying that i agree with the some of the critique of the show, there are pacing issues and so many topics that remain unexplored, these comments are absolutely valid...but the thing is, i can be aware and accept these issues and it would still not reduce my enjoyment of the show, i think we all have different tolerance levels for the media that we consume, and god knows i have enjoyed shows more issues than tms2 (Danyok anyone?)

Ok time to rave about this show, i have been rewatching ep 10 since last sunday and yesterday i rewatched the whole season and i was ugly sobbing from the moment seojoon said "i lost" to the end, this show gave me everything i wanted and everything i didn't know i needed

reading all the jiwoo apologist posts here and on twitter, i'm for sure not alone in seeing myself in him, not defending his actions at all but i get how he got to that point...

guys, being jiwoo is hard, he lost his parents when he was still a teenager, finding cooking to be his only comfort and then had a breakup where his ex wish him unhappiness for the rest of his life. that shit will stick with you and shape you, on top of that being orphan trying to make a living in seoul, i'm sure he experienced a lot of discrimination and unwanted pity. his walls are so high because he needed to protect himself in a world where he is alone, this is not a person who is used to receive love and kindness

despite that jiwoo became a kind person (not a great boyfriend though as both his ex & seojoon will learn the hard way), jiwoo cared and tried to protect seojoon after knowing him only for a few days, jiwoo tried to help hyuanggi out even after he tried to blackmail seojoon, jiwoo thought about his ex when he is with seojoon because he finally know how much he hurted her & felt sorry (how many of us have imagined that the people who hurted us would do this?) the way jiwoo care for yooha as if she is his daughter T_T, jiwoo remain respectful and kind to the village elders even when they talked shit about his dead parents!! and they literally came in to his flop restaurant to call him unlikeable to his face. jiwoo take all that with a straight face, he can handle the hostility and unkindness because this is what he is used to, a part of him thinks that he deserves it and another part of him finds comfort in the familiarity of pain and loneliness...

when the villagers finally showed some kindness towards him, something broke inside jiwoo and i felt that...that was cathartic, seojoon's love alone will never be enough to cure jiwoo of his loneliness, insecurities and fears. and it shouldn't be either, we can love someone but we can never be everything to that person. humans needs a whole support network, that burden should not be carried by one person, that is not fair or healthy

"even though someone is by my side, there are times i need someone else"

when jiwoo said that to his ex, i think both seojoon and many viewers thought he was refering to him wishing that he was back with his ex or thinking that seojoon is not enough. i interpret it as jiwoo understanding that people cannot be fulfilled with a romantic relationship alone, we needs to have some variation of other relationships, with family, friends, colleagues or we need to at least be ok with who we are when we are alone...so yes, seojoon is not enough

"I was alone, whiIe kang seojoon was surrounded by people. I hate feeling this way. Its like without kang seojoon, i dont exist either"

I don't think jiwoo had much of any relationship with anyone aside from seojoon, and he spent so much time in that apartment waiting for seojoon with only his destructive thoughts as company, and when those noises became so loud that it was unbearable, he ran away, just like he did in the first season, this is his MO!

jiwoo loves seojoon so much, but he could not understand why someone like seojoon would want to be with him, when seojoon who is loved and who have so many other happy relationships in his life, and so jiwoo is terrified of the day seojoon will realise this and jiwoo would loose everything again, he can't handle that, it's not that he doesn't trust seojoon, but he have zero trust that he would be enough for seojoon. at the same time jiwoo is desperate to love and be loved by seojoon, he was so happy that it made him vulnerable, that is when his defence mechanism kicked in. jiwoo put up those walls to protect himself not knowing that he is also trapping himself behind those walls

jiwoo spent a year without seojoon, and he was miserable, but it was not for nothing, he gained a support system in yoohaa and her mom, he can now allow himself to depend on people who loves him, and he has his own flop restaturang that he now can work hard to...uhm un-flop. the show ended with jiwoo finally coming to terms with his cowardness and starting to work on breaking down those walls and he was finally ready to let seojoon all the way in

so to all of us who recognise ourselves in jiwoo, its ok to receive and accept love for what it is, none of us are perfect and love is definitely not, hurt and disappointment are inevitable, its ok to take a break when it become too much and then pick yourself up again...learn to forgive ourselves and those who hurt us

credit of all of the wonderful pictures: twitter user @_ouruniverse09

[dojae-huh]

hi huh 🫶 so many good news happened in just a span of one day yesterday, the reaction on X is chaotic so your blog is my safe space!

i love jaehyun's new song! it showed a new color of his vocals, and his lyricism (though i'm not really fluent in korean, i can't say much about it) and the chance for him to be creative and do what he wants. it was nice and refreshing 💛

do the ever supportive "co-worker", posting about every neo solo on his ig each time. it's endearing 🫶 has become a thing for jaedo, they really do have a special connection hehe

nct 2023 announced a few hours after jaehyun's solo, which i would admit a very bad move on sm's part. though i'm excited really, with the return of t7s unit and the upcoming nct concert. but i do notice one thing - where is nct japan unit??

i did my basic google search, lastart will be around 5 eps and this week is the 3rd eps. So 2 weeks more and we have the final lineup for nct's last unit. and it's just right before the nct concert and album release, so i was expecting them to be included in 😔 i feel very bad for these trainees, all these fans doomsaying and planning to boycott any nct activities is just evil they're innocent :( the fandom, at least on twitter is a whole mess, i can only hope that nct 2023 is as successful as the other nct albums. i feel it's safe to hide behind ask and say about this, and i love reading your replies so i hope you don't mind my thought dump haha

i'm also curious about your thoughts on riize? i've been actively following them and they're really good!! all the boys seem promising and i'm shaking with anticipation for new content haha. they just had their first ig live last night, it's cute how shotaro was suspected as the leader since he's leading the group greeting!

link for group greeting -> https:// twitter.com /riizepics/status/1688883426659872768?s=46&t=m039VaKV8OZmu71_7XkSMQ

hope u have a good day and thank u for readinggg 🫶

Hi,

X is like a busy market where everyone hurry, shout and shove others with their elbows, meanwhile small blogs are like bars with regulars.

I can't say much about Jae's lyrics as well. As English is not my native language, I can't even feel how off the English parts are.

Many pop songs don't have intricately crafted lyrics, they just rely on words of association, a few sentences that vaguely paint a scene or describe a feeling, therefore, Jae shouldn't be much worse than the average male singer nowadays, me thinks. He does try to be poetic, describe love taking certain moments in daily life, states of "being/existing" as a starting point (spending time alone in a room, longing; daily life on the road; yearning after parting), which is nice.

NCT2023 album will be released in less than three weeks, there is little time for promotion. If the shops are ready for pre-order, it is time to make the fans know. It's inevitable that announcements overlap, NCTLab is a side project, like SM Classics, not a solo album. Sm moving to NCT2023 doesn't mean the promotion of "Horizon" has stopped. "Forever only" was included in several articles with best songs, there was a remix.

The MV has Mnet 2023.08.03 stamp at the very beginning. Seems like the MV was originally scheduled to be released earlier, on the 3d and not on the 8th?

Fans are quick to say SM does something intentionally to undermine their artists, when oftentimes it's circumstances and SM's lack of staff to properly manage everything. Which should be fixed, for sure.

Let's appreciate that Jae's MV was shot in Italy, has the boyfriend vibe that will give the song a bigger chance to take off, and not in a studio with a few hung lights like Moon Sujin&Taeil's The Moon.

The last unit is scheduled (tentatively) to release the first solo at the end of 2023. The unit need to train together, shoot some promotional content (like NCT LIfe). Quite possible they will start with a showcase in Japan to launch them. It is Riize' time now.

NCT2023 will have merch. And you can't make one for NCT Japan while the members are still unknown. Plus, the fans will hate the new unit for "riding on the coattails". They haven't earned the NCTnation concert yet.

It's OK. SungTaro were accused of every possible evil as well. A couple of years later the same fandom was crying over their departure.

Every NCT album was planned to be boycotted. Didn't happen.

Riize group greeting

I've checked Riize IG and the first track video, I will observe their debut. I have a feeling they will become like WayV for me: I'll tune in only for the albums and won't follow closely. The concept isn't for me. I have no interest in bands and the garage group aesthetics. Seunghan and Shotaro are the only attracting factors, the new members didn't pick my interest. I might as well just subscribe to a Seunghan stan acc to not lose the sight of him.

[girls-scenarios]

Girl Group Spotlight: IRRIS

(This post is also on Twitter!)

IRRIS is a four member girl group under JUSTICE RECORDS that debuted with their EP "Wanna Know" on July 6th. Three of the four members are former members of both Good Day and REDSQUARE, making this their third time debuting. All of the members are also adults, which is refreshing to see especially when so many groups are debuting with younger and younger idols. Their concept is mature and chic and really stands out in the industry.

Members:

I.L: I.L (Kim Jiwon) is the oldest member and leader, born in January of 1997. She was the first member of IRRIS to be revealed. You might recognize her from Good Day, REDSQUARE, and her time on The Unit. She was eliminated from The Unit on episode 7, unfortunately there isn't much focus on her though. Her previous stage names are Genie and Green. She's also an actress and has been in a handful of projects, including "I Can See Your MBTI" and "IDOL: The Coup." She's a bright person who likes coffee, and her role model is f(x)'s Krystal.

Liv: Liv (Kim Chaeyoung) is the second oldest member, born in July of 1997. She is the main dancer and rapper and was the last member of IRRIS to be revealed. You might recognize her from Good Day or REDSQUARE, her previous stage name was Cherry. She's a really good dancer and her specialty is dancing fast. She loves a lot of different colors and her role model is Lisa from BlackPink. She really wants to go on Running Man and take a drive with the other members, since she has a driver's license.

Yunseul: Yunseul (Hwang Nayoon) is the third oldest member, born in March of 1999. She is the main vocalist of the group and was the third member to be revealed. She is also a former member of Good Day and REDSQUARE and previously used her first name Nayoon as her stage name. Yunseul has also done some acting, you can see her in "I Can See Your MBTI." She's always loved singing and drama and was in choir when she was younger. She's a bright and bubbly person, and her nickname is Chick Ari. Her charming point is how positive she is. She loves animals and wants to start a shelter (?) for stray dogs. She does have a few cover videos, such as this cover of How Far I'll Go.

Nina: Nina (Nina Nadia Mateer) is the youngest member, born in March of 2003, and is the only member who wasn't part of Good Day or REDSQUARE. She is the lead dancer and a vocalist and was the second member to be revealed in the lineup. Nina was actually born in Australia, and she's said to be currently studying law there! She decided to become an idol after being scouted because she wants to experience lots of new things.

Songs:

IRRIS just made their debut with "Wanna Know," a uniquely bright song with powerful yet sweet vocals and a horn base. The sound is somewhat reminiscent of songs by Girls Day and feels very grown in a way we haven't seen in Kpop recently. There are two b-sides on the EP, "Bye Bye" and "Stay With Me." Alongside a lot of live stages, they also have a it's Live stage singing their song with a live band.

Since this group is very new, there isn't a ton of content for them yet. However, they did recently guest on Arirang Radio, where they sang their b-sides. They also did a short cover dance relay on genie's YouTube channel. You can also see them in a New Face video by TongTongCulture.

The best place to follow them is on their TikTok! IRRIS is super active on TikTok and they post dances, challenges, and other content. They aren't as active on other social media accounts, but they're also on Instagram, Twitter, and YouTube. It seems like their company is actually doing their best to promote them this time as this is more live stages than the members re-debuting have ever gotten to do, so I'm super hopeful for the future of this group! Go check them out and give the brave girls of IRRIS a listen!

[trkstrnd]

hiya. wanted to pop in after i read ur rant post, i hope that's ok.

i agree with what you've said, and personally for me, after i knew That had happened, what had kept me sane was that deep down, i knew carlos would never do this, it is so out of left field, and this is just a shitty plot point the writers pulled out their asses in the s4 writers room (if they kept insisting that they thought of this since s1, they're going to have to try harder, and even then, i'm not sure i would believe them.) for the sake of drama. they know having a wedding planning arc throughout this season doesn't make for good drama, so what do they do? add in this shitty plot to impede their wedding planning.

what really kills me is, in the process of this, it might have undermined carlos' entire character arc in the previous seasons. it really hurts. i don't hate him at all, i understand completely where he's coming from. what i hate is carlos' as a character (in canon at least) suffers as a direct result of the showrunner and writers' shitty plotting and writing (i think this post makes a damn good point of what i'm trying to say,) and i hate how there's nothing we can do in the face of this. i feel helpless, and it hurts to see them go down this route for the sake of 'good drama', whatever the hell they think it means. clearly the writers and the fandom as a whole have wildly different understanding of things, as clearly shown in the interviews they've done so far.

which is why, i'm willing to wait it out and see how this unfolds, even though from the snippets i've read re: the upcoming eps, i think it will piss me off and probably the fandom as a whole. at the end of the day, as the eps start airing and we slowly move past it, i think we can easily choose to take away whatever we want to from this arc, and shove the rest down in a deep, deep drawer where i personally would never revisit again.

it just really sucks for now bc we only have one ep of information to work with, and 5-6 more days to wait until the next ep. i really do appreciate posts of ppl reminding us of how they've handled previous bad arcs (tk relapsing, the breakup, gwyn's death, etc., you get the drill) that have turned out to be phenomenal in hindsight, and i'm clinging to this until the eps start airing, and we get a more coherent picture. until then, we only have each other to discuss and perhaps rant to, to try to make sense of it all.

sorry for the rant, and thank u for reading this all the way through. sending u love in the meantime, and i know we'll get through this with time.

anon i mean this with everything in my body and soul and heart.

you summed it up perfectly.

we know it’s a bad plot, and we know we will move past it, and i really think the thing that hurts the most is it does really taint their entire story so far, knowing he had this all along, but i am hoping and praying that we get more, better plot in the next few episodes, and hopefully we can shove this down and forget it ever existed.

the disconnect between these writers and the fandom is insane, though. that’s what’s getting me. it’s like tim genuinely likes making us upset. remember when his twitter handle was cancelledagain? it’s like he doesn’t care about his own show, and the real drama for him is watching us all react and hate him for the plots he pulls out of his ass.

it’s so out of left field, and it fucks with everything we’ve known so far, and that’s why i see a bunch of people giving up on this plot and show, because it feels like we have been lied to the past few years as well.

even though we haven’t. it wasn’t the truth until he sat down and wrote it in. it’s fucking dumb, and surviving on 43 minutes a week with a plot like this is exhausting.

thank you so much. please never hesitate to dm me, anon. this ask was so very appreciated.

[amyscascadingtabs]

this is sappy but whatever. i wrote most of this before the season started (which is why i come off as reasonable and somewhat mentally stable about all of this) but felt appropriate to post it now as a thank you. ❤️

i have vivid memories from the night b99 was cancelled. the news came late evening my time, and i had been editing fic and checked twitter and there it was. loud and clear. i don’t remember which site it was but the picture was jake and amy with their wedding cake and that made everything feel even worse.

i remember freaking out even though i had been prepared, because those last days before the news hit on tumblr were... panicked. but i still freaked out to the extent that i ran outside in my pajama pants and hoodie and blue plastic slippers and called my mom, and then i walked up and down the streets where i lived in the darkness and cried in frustration as she tried to talk me down. i remember there were random guys with motorcycles out? but i was too hysterical to care. i’m pretty sure i screamed something to my mom about ”HOW CAN BIG BANG THEORY GET A BILLION SEASONS BUT THIS SHOW GETS CANCELLED????”

i know everyone who was in the fandom at the time has their cancellation story. what played the biggest part in mine was the fact that i felt like i hadn’t had enough time. really, i had only just become active in the fandom, only just started interacting with people on here and writing my first few fics, but i was absolutely loving it. it was giving me happiness again after a long period of emptiness and depressive feelings. when it was cancelled, what made me feel the worst was the fact that i’d had so little time – to make friends, write fic and react to episodes together. i felt deeply jealous of everyone who’d gotten more.

thinking about it coming to an end now has made me remember that night and those feelings of jealousy. because i did get more time. i got three more years. that night, i remember asking for just one, for a half, for anything, and i got three years.

and these three years have been a whirlwind of emotions and feelings and episodes and debates and discussions and gifsets and fanfic and asks and having this as my safe space while pretty much everything changed around me in the outside world, and i just want you all to know that i have never taken a single day of them for granted. this show could have been taken from me before i’d ever gotten the chance to grow with it and alongside it, and instead it was part of my life for three whole years.

i have a really, really good memory (four time quiz champion anyone? just me?okay <3), and i remember so much of it in such detail, and it's so weird to think about how long it's been when it also feels like yesterday.

i remember my first comment on peraltiago parenting experience, my first episode-related fic, the insane high after the renewal, staying up all night to watch the wedding live. i remember writing fanfiction on the beach while on vacation in greece, on a plane to berlin, at home on my parents balcony late late at night. i remember the honeymoon episode title being released, s6 starting filming again, the excitement over every little piece of news and finding about the cast directing. i remember labor fic and christmas fics and when i scroll back to pictures of my paris trip in january 2019 it's interspersed with a billion pictures of andy at the golden globes. i remember lighting my fairy lights in my little basement room and watching season 6 in bed at 2.30 am if it was a big episode, and watching it in the morning before fridays in high school most days. i remember writing post-ep fics during classes and on my phone on subways and trains. i remember the s7 news, and the casecation nerves and debates, and fucking kissgate. being named "the class amy santiago" by my friends when we graduated and getting a little silver paper plate to show for it. i remember the first fic exchange and inventing julian and simon santiago and i remember meeting @johnny-and-dora and eating wagamamas in manchester and talking about how simon santiago was DEFINITELY on the stairs and buying a little fake plant that i named andy plantberg (he's still in a box somewhere). i remember writing fic during slow hours in the ice cream shop i worked at. moving and putting up my framed b99 poster in my own apartment (very much still up). finding out about trying and everyone going fucking crazy. infertility fic. melissa's pregnancy news. s7 promo and standing outside my job the very first day and texting siân "AMY HAS TO PEE!!!!!???" because that was in the promo and we knew there were pregnancy tests involved in the first episode. the crazy happiness of s7 finally premiering. everyone going crazy about jake and amy deciding to start trying and how i could quote the scene verbatim the next few days. the week leading up to trying, what turned out to be the last normal week before the pandemic. the fucking MESS i was after that. the following week and ding dong and crying with happiness. being dizzy with hyperfixation joy the following day and barely feeling aware of the covid pandemic for the first few days because i was just thinking about jake and amy having a baby. getting through the first few weeks mostly because of b99. admiral peralta and finding out we were having a BOY and not even being disappointed even though the headcanon had been the opposite for years because it was perfect. the iconic b99 quizzes. lights out and mac being born. somehow managing 475 days before season 8, coping together when we got the news about the final season, watching the cast do their final day of filming. the first stream being interrupted by a storm warning and cutting out several minutes because of course. getting to see parents peraltiago and MAC and the insane speed with which those few seconds were giffed. more b99 quizzes. the vow renewal. the finale.

i remember all of it and so much more and as much as my heart is breaking, i’m trying to remind myself that i could have gotten none of this.

brooklyn nine-nine has been such an important part of my life. and it always, always will be, forever. i could have lost it all that night, and instead i got three more years. if i'd known that when i was walking the streets outside my house in the darkness in complete panic, i would have cried with happiness.

so thank you. all of you. for everything. ❤️❤️❤️ for the friendships, the joy, the asks, the debates, the fic response, EVERYTHING. whether we've shared three years or one or less, just know that i'm so grateful.

have some random pictures i found and screenshots from my private instagram (which is inactive so don't bother) from when i started this hyperfixation. jesus lmao 😭😭😭😭 i am less insane now. no i'm not. but i express it less on instagram.

[breelandwalker]

Hex Positive, Ep. 021 - Witchcraft and Modern Law

Now available wherever you get your podcasts!

As promised, the followup episode is here! This time, I'm digging into witchcraft as it relates to modern law, plus covering a few key 20th-century events that I missed in Episode 20 and some legal codes that may apply to your practice even if they don't deal with witchcraft directly. We'll also be discussing some instances of modern witch hunts that are still occurring in some parts of the world and there are articles you can check out for more information below. (Massive trigger warning for violence and abuse in the ones discussing modern witch hunts.)

(Incidentally, the information I discovered while researching modern witch persecutions is EXACTLY why I get so cheesed off when some privileged politician whines about being the target of "a witch hunt." Like buddy, you don't even know the meaning of the word. Having to face the consequences of your own actions isn't a witch hunt. That's just cosmic justice serving up a long-overdue headslap.)

ANNOUNCEMENTS

Witch With Me - Book Club and 2021 Witch Census

Samhain Witch Market Diversity Richmond, Richmond VA Sunday, October 17, 2021, 3pm-9pm Indoor/Outdoor, Masks Required Facebook Event Page

SOURCES

Folk Magic - Powwow: History and Practices (LearnReligions.com)

Analysis | In Canada, pretending to be a witch is a punishable offense (Washington Post, Oct. 31, 2018)

Victoria clears witches for takeoff (The Sydney Morning Herald, July 21, 2005)

Modern-day witches still facing 'endless abuse and threats' (The Independent, Feb. 09, 2020)

Witch Hunts: a global problem in the 21st century (Deutsche Welle, Oct. 08, 2020)

Chinese 'witches' are banding together after rural Chinese communities ostracise them (AP, South China Morning Post, Jan, 16, 2018)

Why Do Witch Hunts Still Happen? (Smithsonian Magazine, Oct. 30, 2015)

Witch Hunts Today: Abuse of Women, Superstition, and Murder Collide in India (Scientific American, Jan. 11, 2018)

"They Burn Witches Here"; Papua New Guinea: Asia's Fastest-Growing Economy Burns Witches (Huffington Post, Oct. 29, 2015)

Witch Hunts Are Back - And This Time They're Targeting Female Activists (HuffPost Brazil, Nov. 01, 2019)

Witch Trials in the 21st Century (National Geographic, Jan. 21, 2011)

Modern witches are stepping out of the shadow of Germany’s folklore (Sleek Magazine, Apr. 30, 2019)

Wikipedia Article - Rehmeyer's Hollow

Wikipedia Article - Satanic Panic

Wikipedia Article - West Memphis Three

Wikipedia Article - Modern witch-hunts

Wikipedia Article - Witchcraft Suppression Act of 1957

Wikipedia Article - Mpumalanga Witchcraft Suppression Bill

BOOKS AND PODCASTS

America Bewitched: The story of witchcraft after Salem (Owen Davies)

American Hysteria, Eps. 4 & 5 - "Satanic Panic, pt 1 & 2"

BS-Free Witchcraft, Ep. 10 - "The Satanic Panic"

BS-Free Witchcraft, Ep. 32 - "A New Satanic Panic?"

Lore, Ep. 62 - "Desperate Measures"

Morbid Podcast - Ep. 122-125, “The West Memphis Three, pt 1-3”

Sacred Actions: Living the Wheel of the Year though Earth-Centered Sustainable Practices (Dana O'Driscoll)

This episode is sponsored by:

Portland Button Works - http://www.portlandbuttonworks.com

PBW Witch Shop - http://www.PBWwitchshop.com

Global Grey Ebooks - http://www.globalgreyebooks.com

Follow the show on Twitter @hex_podcast for the latest updates! You can also find me as @BreeNicGarran on Twitter, TikTok, Instagram, and Wordpress. For more information on how to support the show and get access to early releases and extra content, visit my Patreon.

Visit my shop to purchase my books and homemade accoutrements for your craft!

Proud member of the Nerd and Tie Podcast Network.

MUSIC CREDITS "Spellbound" & "Miri's Magic Dance" Ads - "Feelin' Good," "March of the Spoons," and "Danse Macabre - Violin Hook" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

[ninjago-bingo]

final month recap

wow, everyone.  we’re here.  we’ve made it.  we’re reached the end of our bingo time, and i’m absolutely floored by the sheer creative output that i’ve seen over these last four months.  everyone, take a moment to give yourself a pat on the back!!!  no matter if you made 1 piece or 10, there’s now a work of art out there in the world that wasn’t there before.  and truly, that’s super heccing rad no matter how you look at it.

so let’s celebrate!  for this recap, we have a total of 20 new pieces, bringing the total amount of ninbingo pieces up to 50.  in the span of four months, this little event has created 50 individual works (five of them in the last day!)  holy cow ya’ll.

i’m putting out this recap now, but don’t worry, it’s not the end yet!  any submissions made to the end of the 30th still count and this post will be updated accordingly :D

fic:

all the things i’ve never done by @sa-you-na-ra. tumblr || prompts: competition and teasing

It’s always a funny thing when the ninja realize new things about each other. Even though living with each other meant they had to see each other all day, there were still small habits or actions that amused the others.

(mod comments: all these little interactions made me smile so much :D looking forward to the rest!)

error 404: answer not found by @m-aster-of-spinjitzu. tumblr || prompt: memories

Akita and Zane talk after the battle in ‘Awakenings’. The conversation… doesn’t go as either of them expect.

(mod comments: the nuances in this fic are fantastic!  also Akita is always a win :D)

Five times kai was a good brother by @/master-of-fluff. tumblr || ao3 || prompts: nightmare and brother

I'm writing kai centric stuff again.

(mod comments: kai IS the big bro of the team!!! i support him all the way!!)

How Garmadon became a chauffeur by @master-of-fluff. tumblr || ao3 || prompt: driving

"um...Kai? Don't you think we should go Slower?" Garmadon asked nervously trying not to panick as they raced down the road at what had to be over the speed limit.

(mod comments: who let Kai drive?  no but honestly this is canon alskdfj)

little things by @/rosiehunterwolf. tumblr || ao3 || ffn.net || prompts: hugs and crying.

"Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you'll look back and realize they were the big things." -Kurt Vonnegut

Lloyd’s tired of being left behind. How is he meant to be the green ninja when he always has to work harder, train better, and wait longer to go on missions with his team? He wants nothing more than to be their equal.

At least, that’s what he thought he wanted.

(mod comments: a post-ep-18 resolution scene?  SIGN ME UP!)

Neither Snow Nor Rain by @fangirltakesall. tumblr || ffn.net || prompt: post-fight

After their return from the Never Realm and all its troubles, Zane is quiet and Nya is incredibly worried. A call to action to a peculiar sort of battle might be enough to change both of those things.

(mod comments: the concept of these two on their own mission together is just so good! excited to see how their dynamic plays out!!)

Never Put Off Until Tomorrow by @/rosiehunterwolf. tumblr || ao3 || ffn.net || prompts: video games and chores

…what can be done today, yada, yada, yada, we all know the saying. So do the ninja- when Master Wu is drilling it into their heads every minute of every day, it’s kind of hard to forget.

Naturally, it only takes them a week (and the biggest new video game in Ninjago) to do so.

(mod comments: this is so in character that it’s frustrating lol.  also Pixal ftw!!)

oh take me back to the start by @/rosiehunterwolf. tumblr || ao3 || ffn.net || prompts: comfort and 3 am

The past should be left in the past. Or, at least, that’s what Jay keeps telling himself. Nadakhan is gone. It’s not logical to still be afraid. But he is, and now everything that he left behind suddenly feels like it’s never going to be the same again.

Cole isn’t so convinced.

(mod comments: Cole is truly the man we all deserve in our lives.)

On Our Own by @redefine-your-identity. tumblr || prompt: home

It’s been a few weeks since Kai and Nya’s parents disappeared without a trace. Needless to say, they’re struggling.

(mod comments: OU C H no poor babies 😭 the relationship dynamic here is great!)

orange and gold by @/m-aster-of-spinjitzu. tumblr || prompt: cooking

...I just need more Cole and Vania content, they seem like they'd be great friends.

Basically it's just 'Cole goes to visit her there, they almost burn down the kitchen, and make way too many puns', lol.

(mod comments: I also always need more Vania content!! the puns in this were breadful!)

permafrost by @/rosiehunterwolf. tumblr || ao3 || ffn.net || prompts: loss of control and promise

It’s not like this is the first time this has happened. It’s not like none of his teammates have ever suffered this kind of guilt and pain. It’s not like Zane himself hasn’t walked through hell before and come out the other side (mostly) in once piece.

Except, this time, it is. It shouldn’t be different, but it is.

(mod comments: super sweet moment between two ninja who deserve more interaction like seriously!!)

Precautionary Tale by @/fangirltakesall. tumblr || ffn.net || prompt: protective

Fighting is different now, and Zane doesn't know why. Yes, he is titanium now, but why should that change anything? It seems to be changing everything, although is all really as it seems?

(mod comments: a great start to a zane-centric fic!  interested to see where it goes next :D)

Star-Ninja! by @rosiehunterwolf. tumblr || ao3 || ffn.net || prompts: siblings and competition 

What happens when the loveable gremlin the ninja adopted off of the streets introduces them to Starfarer comics?

Chaos ensues, of course.

stuck with you (through bright and blue) by @/rosiehunterwolf. tumblr || ao3 || ffn.net || prompt: protective

Kai only wants two things: to protect Lloyd, and to give him the best birthday ever. Unfortunately, Lloyd seems hell-bent on making that as difficult as possible. Kai’s always prided himself on achieving the impossible, but dealing with human emotions is much more complicated than beating up Garmadon’s generals or shooting enemies with fire, as he quickly learns. Movie!verse

(mod comments: happy birthday lloyd!! look at him getting the love he deserves uwu)

Take a walk in the rain. by @/master-of-fluff. tumblr || ao3 || prompt: rain

Cole had always loved the rain, the way it smelled, the way it felt on his skin, and especially the mud! Whenever it rained his Mother would put on his rain coat and boots And they'd both go out and splash around in the puddles and make mud cakes and do all sorts of things.

(mod comments: this fic made me smile a lot :D loved the way it was arranged!) 

the hues of an empty sky by @/m-aster-of-spinjitzu. tumblr || prompt: crying

Missing memories, or having two of them for one moment - not quite the same, but if there’s one thing Jay’s leant over the last few weeks, it’s that literally nothing makes sense anymore.

Or, some Skybound aftermath, Zane actually expressing emotions about his memory switch being turned off for all those years, and what was supposed to be a ‘they tell everyone about the erased timeline’ fic, but it turned into a 'two characters who barely interact on screen talk at like one am in the morning, and don’t actually tell the other what exactly they’re alluding to the whole time’ fic that I wrote at like one am-

(mod comments: Skybound resolution? SIGN ME THE HECK UP YES)

The Make-Cole-Realize-How-Much-We-Love-Him Competition by @21st-century-ninja. tumblr || ao3 || prompts: bets and competition

Jay and Kai share a horrified look.  “He really doesn’t get it,” Jay says.

Kai shakes his head.  “We need to show him somehow.”

“Show me what?” Cole asks, exasperated again.  

“How much we love you!” Kai exclaims.  “Somehow, it’s not getting through your thick skull that we want to sit next to you because you’re you, so I’m gonna have to just prove it to you.”

(mod comments: a silly little movie fic!)

twitter was a mistake by @/21st-century-ninja. tumblr || ao3 || prompts: teasing and birthday

Kai 🔥 @flaminhotninja ☑

so who was gonna tell me that Jay used to be a game show host huh

🌺✨ the Gift of Jay ✨🌺 @zaptrap ☑

Replying to @flaminhotninja

NO WHO SHOWED YOU

(mod comments: twitter was a mistake)

two halves of a broken whole by @/rosiehunterwolf. tumblr || ao3 || ffn.net || prompts: scars and post-fight

The Sons of Garmadon have been defeated. Garmadon is in prison. The city has been saved.

In the aftermath of the battle, Nya is more than ready to take a much-needed break. But the life of a ninja is messy. Recovery is never that simple. Although the wounds may have healed, the scars still remain.

Zane’s scars seem to match up, though. And maybe together, they can begin to heal.

(mod comments: aggressive care is my jam, and this is it!)

wait by @rosiehunterwolf. tumblr || ao3 || ffn.net || prompts: home and memories

Lloyd’s not so great at being patient. It’s not his fault though- maybe he would be better at it if waiting didn’t always end up being so disappointing- if people actually kept their promises. But this time’s going to be different, he knows it. His father will come back for him. And Lloyd’s going to wait.

As long as it takes.

(mod comments: baby.  baby boy.  baby.  protecc him plz.)

[waterparksdrama]

im a new fan of parx (ik its a dumb choice but im lucky enough to hate twitter) and if i still like parx in a few months i'll def look back and cringe and i havent listened to airplane conversations and whatever b is yet so heres my very dumb and def not valid album and ep ranking

1. greatest hits for numb, fuzzy, magnetic, icebath and see you in the future only. those r the ones i actually listen to and numb was the first parx song i listened to so idk it has sentimental value to me i guess

2. entertainment. i was going through a tough time in jan and tantrum literally helped me so much i love it so much. 11.11, rare and peach (lobotomy) r rlly good as well and they sound rlly good

3. cluster. i like crave cus the lyrics are way too catchy and mad all the time has like sounds i like and it idk makes me happy i guess

4. double dare cus take her to the moon and dizzy r just WHAT HOW IS IS LEGAL TO B THAT GOOD WHAT. gloom boys, made in america and little violence r rlly good as well. ignore the fact its 4th cus its way above fandom,

5. fandom. i used to rlly like it (like it wouldve been ranked n1 a few months ago) but i rlly only listen to war crimes, cherry red and whatever the last song is now. i like the version of dream boy or whatever its called that feels all like robot invasiony or whatever though, its not good enough to get onto like the ones i listen to but good enough for me not to want to skip it like watch what happens next (i like the you dont love me the same part tho its the only redeeming quality of the song). groupchat is good as well but its not even a song. I FORGOT WORST IDK WHY I LIKE IT SO MUCH BUT I JUST DO ITS SAD AND IM SAD AND THATS LIKE PERFECT MATCH I LIKE SAD SONGS OKAY

this post made me realise i say idk too much but its better than saying like or the time so idk

pls roast me for having gh as my n1 but at least ik that h is gonna be shit, im only listening to it for the limited otto and geoff moments we might get. i do have enough brains to stop listening to an artist when they get too shitty cus i stopped listening to coldplay after whatever album they made in 2016 or something so maybe after h ill stop, or if its actually okay and my sentimental value to dizzy and tantrum convince me enough ill maybe still like them idk all ik is that i should stop before i start telling u my life story goodbye have a nice day or night if u ever sleep, sleep if u can umm yeah bye

this is weird ive never submitted a post here and this is way too long bye for good maybe idk i need help

tag this "this anon needs help now" or something cus i rlly do

i dont even know where to start with this ask - iz

[straighttohellbuddy]

📓 !!

Okay im so excited please know I think about How The Light Gets In's world every day still, and so anyways here is a side story I want to write but there's a lot of set up regarding the reader and eef becoming friends again. For context, they were incredibly close around 2014-2017, but people were getting creepy and invasive and demanding about their friendship (think 2012 toxic side of the Phandom, if that makes sense), and a lot of the reader's relationships were strained at that time because while they had been successful before, they were absolutely blowing up after their first album released and they became far more mainstream. They felt like they were bothering the people they had become closest to, both because they're worried that they're a bother, and because gossip rags and paps would harrass their friends looking for a scoop, and so they ended up just completely cutting off contact without warning one day right before they went on their first tour. the start of HTLGI is about 3 years since they'd been in proper contact with any of the creators they were close to at that time.

DON'T LOOK AT ME on their 2017 ep Hyperfocus was a more general song in response to everything that had been happening in their life around that time, with a focus on how they stop associating with anyone for a while, without outright addressing it, but on their latest album n o s t a l g i a, read at 5am ft. Troye was specifically written at the start of quarantine, when the reader was getting back into YouTube, about their feelings regarding how their friendship with ethan ended, as they spent a lot of this time looking back of their YouTube career, and he was the person they were closest to for a very long time, before they iced everyone out.

OKAY SO THERES MORE OF THE BACKGROUND OF THE WHOLE FIC AND THE READER BUT

Werewolf Ethan & Mark. I'm sorry I don't make the rules. They have golden retriever energy you cannot change my mind. But also because this is the HTLGI you know that supernatural characteristics are able to be activated rather than just triggered by the full moon. What I'm trying to say is since this is set in the year of Unus Annus, they film a video together that's like, you know that show where a person has to try and outwit a professional tracker? Except its the reader being tracked by two werewolves at night in a national park. Reader is wearing some sort of night vision camera on themselves so whenever it cuts to them the audience can't actually see how they're using their powers, if that makes sense.

Also the reader agreed to this knowing it would probably be when they ended up telling Mark and Ethan about them being a demon.

Video is titled Hunting Down An Old Friend

A few Moments that the boys edit out:

The reader using their stupidly sharp prehensile tail to swing from tree branches, though they leave in shots where the reader's tail can't be seen.

Knowing that with the werewolves having advanced hearing, the reader would give themselves away by talking to the camera, they take a few minutes having flown up to a high tree branch, to pull out a notebook and do a little sketch of how Mark and Ethan appear in their Demon True Sight, and holding it up to their camera.

Werewolves being one of the animals who can kind of sense demons without being able to identify them, essentially like dogs can sense natural disasters and are often good judges of character, this can be heightened on command for werewolves. There's about 15 minutes of footage cut out of the boys discussing or mentioning how this place has awful vibes and that they should have done this during the day. It gets worse as they get closer to the reader, who didn't realise that the boys hadn't thought to ever use that particular power around them before.

("I say this with so much love and appreciation for you, dude," Ethan yells, looking up at you from the base of the tree they'd finally found you in, "but I- this is making me anxious I feel like something terrible's gonna happen, and we should probably get out of here and film the rest of the video back at Mark's." And behind him, Mark's nodding, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, eyes scanning the trees for whatever was most likely the cause of this terrible impending doom.

Oh. It's you. And they don't know its you.

Now or never, you suppose.

"Can you cut the cameras for a second? You're going to be fine I promise," you called back, and though they obligingly did, they both seemed antsy. You cleared your throat awkwardly, "that... that terrible feeling, that's not the park or anything in it- well I mean, it is, but it's just- it's me."

and later

"Dude your wings smell like rotten eggs."

"To YOU Ethan! And no they don't!"

"If it makes you feel better they smell like burning and rotten eggs."

"It does not."

(for reference, when enhancing their sense of smell werewolves can kind of distinguish various supernatural creatures, or parts of supernatural creatures. Some creatures have an inherent scent, but some, like angels and demons, only have distinct scents when they've activated certain attributesor abilities; demon wings smell like fire and brimstone, which unfortunately means burning and rotten eggs. I like to think angels wings are like the love potion in Harry Potter that smells like the things you love the most. Mark and Ethan usually don't enhance it around each other because they smell like wet dog to the other)

This gets about 2k notes on tumblr. The reader likes it:

Ethan finally finding Y/N at the end of Hunting Down An Old Friend (2020) Colourised.

Other things to note regarding all this:

It takes a while to rebuild their friendship to the point where they're comfortable enough to be on camera together (eef and reader specifically).

However, the Unus Annus video is the first thing they properly do together, and the reader, in an effort to connect more and make up for the past, will join in multiplayer gaming streams if asked.

Impromptu duet in proximity Among Us of Young Volcanoes by Fall Out Boy, which has their respective chats and fandoms losing their minds, except it stops abruptly after the first chorus as they both remember the opening lines of the second verse (make it easy, say I never mattered -- those lyrics hit a little too close to home)

But also the reader convinces him to join him for a proper cover in like, February of 2021, and it's something deeply sappy (I'm thinking Bon Iver by mxmtoon because I think its sweet and fits them well)

Also Ethan being reminded that the reader is kind of a much bigger deal than when they'd been friends before.

designed to hurt (touch me) from their ep Working On It is nominated for a Grammy for Track of the Year, and n o s t a l g i a wins Best Pop Album (because it's my fic and I said so)

FIRST OF ALL designed to hurt (touch me) is a beautifully produced song about Corpse (which people do not know) and the title itself is literally making fun of something he said IMAGINE his reaction to it being Grammy Nominated 😂😂😂 God he'd be proud but lowkey fuming, meanwhile the moment the nominations are announced the reader tweets:

me: here is an album where I processed my entire world view including heartfelt explorations of the trauma of existing and oversharing in the public eye from a young age without the traditional barrier between audience and entertainer

the grammys: that's cute BUT you know the song you wrote to bully your boyfriend and also be horny on main for him before you guys were even dating? THAT deserves its own recognition.

meanwhile Ethan's like..... this is the same person who I filmed a video with playing cards against humanity, and you laughed so hard you almost threw up. I am very proud but deeply confused.

The Hot Meme of Late April 2021 is "2 time Grammy Award Winning Artist Y/N" with a gif, still, or quote from the reader where they're just being an absolute chaos gremlin.

Of course we have "If I bleached my asshole for charity I'd do it tastefully."

2 Time Grammy Award Winning Artist Y/N speaking to their actual boyfriend in the year of our lord 2020: You are being executed for Clown Crimes.

ethan posts a short video to twitter simply of his screen where he's renaming a folder from "Never Before Seen Images of Grammy Award Winning Artist Y/N" simply changing it to 2 time Artist. The reader responds specifically to his tweet with a video of themselves asking Google how to hard reset someone else's computer.

So many screenshots from old videos surface that week.

I miss this world. Sorry this is rambly!!

[doctorwholover01]

Hello, hi wow it's been a while since I've posted on the tag. Then again there is really nothing to post about it really speculate about. Anyways, we got the episode names which is fun and some photo bare minimum. With this though I wanted to make a post about the episode names and the synopsis of episode two of s11 I wanna talk about specifically the part of;

' Daryl is in his own intense hellish situation trying to find dog and finding more than he expected '

Like many others who I have seen on here and on Twitter my mind went ' it's Leah '. We knew she was coming back and specifically them using dog as a way of leading Daryl to Leah as it sounds in this is very remanist of in Find me where dog leads Carol and Daryl to the cabin. Now as I said we knew Lynn was coming back as Leah we suspected as much. But I want to talk more on how the importance of the Leah is a reaper theory comes into the episode names in my mind. To break down:

11×01: Acheron Part I

11×02: Acheron Part II

- Acheron a river in Greece and known in Greece mythology as the ' river of woe ' and one of the five rivers of the underworld. This river would be a passage for the newly deceased into the underworld. I thought it was interesting that they are naming a two part episode after Greek mythology and especially the river of woe, of sorrow of distress. This could possibly be the inevitable end to Alexandria or something more. There is a need for food and a need to rebuild to survive could this be why they used this myth as well as in episode two having to fight walker. So basically all in all this two parter will possibly be sorrowful. With the return of Leah though the next few episode names is where I thought of what the writers may or may not being doing.

11×03: Hunted

11×04:Rendition

11×05: Out of the Ashes ( if this isn't a Caryl EP I will riot )

11×06: On the Inside

11×07: Promises Broken

11×08: For Blood.

Okay these episodes right here their names I really like them and my brain may be making up shit or thinking up a possible dream story but heres what I thought may happen when I read after ep1 and 2 names.

So episode threes name for me went for two things 1. Being Daryl being hunted by Leah and the reaper's ( I'm not so sure about that one ) 2. Daryl being hunted by his past of Leah so her presence being there as well as the group being hunted by the reaper's specifically Maggie her story to this and how Leah being a reaper will make the story that more interesting. Because of whatever hold she has on Daryl can be used to her advantage.

Episode four being name Rendition I thought was interesting in two ways in story wise. Rendition is a performative piece of music so a performance is being performed from Eugene group possible to get to the commonwealth. And as well as Leah to get her way into the group and get to Maggie to preform as a defensively, alone in order for that hold on Daryl to be held. A performance is going to happen in each way.

Out of the ashes episode 5 like I said will fight if it's not a Caryl episode. I'm joking... Kind of. Out of the ashes to me sounds like a big phew moment maybe the group find food, find Connie, get in contact with Eugene group. All of that to me is what I think this episode may be a kind of relief but not really. Cause it's TWD and we haven't known relief for years. Like episode one and two this episode I don't really have a lot to say expect that.

Episode six, On the Inside, now from I think it apparent filming spoilers of Norman filming as Daryl with reaper's there has been this theory going about that Daryl will actually be a reaper because of Leah which I'm not going lie to me just sounds like bad story telling if it goes through. Daryl character had found his place in where he belongs which is with team fam he says as much to Carol in find me. To me On the Inside would be where Leah found in EP 2 would come into play with her reaper story line. She is on the inside of the group now possibly part of it she is inside there walls and she has infiltrated the group which in order for her possibly maybe being a reaper leader gives her a head start on how to get to Maggie to know the group and the bring it all down and burn it, pillage and take everything. I don't think Daryl is working with the reaper like I said it would be a horrible 360 on his character now but infact Leah infiltrating on the inside. As well as Eugene group getting a feel for the commonwealth scooping it out. Seeing what that life is.

Promises broken this episode is why I think it's Leah working on the inside of the group to infiltrate. She has most likely told Daryl she doesn't have a group in order to get to Maggie since the reaper's seem to be her storyline and now Daryl possibly with Leah. Like I said I think Leah from the inside of the group will try to burn it all down like with the Whispers expect Leah will be smart about it hitting already weak points like alpha did but not showing her hand too quickly. Remmber the hold on Daryl I said about she will try to use that break him down more against the group possibly reminding him of his time in the woods. Maybe he's sees through it through the lie hence a Promise broken. She is break that hold on him promise of his past of which he left and felt guilty about where he thought he belonged broken. Which would tie into.

The half way point... I think. For Blood episode eight. The reaper want blood as we've seen a little in the extra episode specifically Maggie groups blood and now it will be all of Alexandria who is Maggie group. I feel in this episode as it is the half way point Leah will show her true colours to everyone making Daryl feel at blame as he has let her into the group and now put HIS BLOOD his family at danger to the reaper's. I think a fight will pan out in this episode and as one of my friends said maybe Daryl will have to chose to either still feel this hold Leah had over him and sacrifice Leah For Blood, for his family to feel he has right his own wrong.

Yeah so basically tada. This is all been stuck in my head for about two days now and I thought I'd share. I'd like to know others opinions on these episodes as well. So I'm just going to peace out again and not post until the trailer comes out.

PSA I do know this has little to nothing to do with Caryl but the Caryl tag is where I post most. I am a Caryl account this is also where I seen the most speculation.

[elitegymnastics]

Q: What is this?

A: It’s a flyer for a virtual fundraiser on June 4th that Elite Gymnastics is playing. You can access the show at quietyear.com

Q: Hasn’t Elite Gymnastics been inactive for like, ten years?

A: Yes. This is the first Elite Gymnastics performance of any kind since November 30th 2012, at the Horn Gallery at Kenyon College in Gambier, Ohio. 

Q: Why did Elite Gymnastics stop playing shows?

A: Elite Gymnastics started out as me (Jaime) and a bunch of my friends agreeing to help me play my songs live back in 2009. I made a lot of weird demos in GarageBand and my friend Dominique Davis from the band Dearling Physique got tired of watching me sit on them. So, he booked me to play at a show he was curating as part of a small local music and arts festival called Clapperclaw. For several months that’s mainly what EG was. At some point the focus shifted to making recordings rather than playing shows, to participate in the emergent culture of new music distributed via MP3 file-sharing. The lineup winnowed to just me and Josh Clancy, who began creating digital EPs that we posted on this Tumblr page as ZIP files full of MP3s accompanied by a PDF of artwork. This is the incarnation of the group that most people are familiar with.

This was before Patreon existed. If Bandcamp was around, we’d never heard of it. Though MP3 file-sharing culture and file transfer sites like MediaFire and MegaUpload allowed anyone to distribute music freely across the world via the internet, it was still pretty difficult to get people to pay you for it. I think it was for this reason that a lot of internet music back then featured a lot of sampling. A lot of artists’ first forays into the world of DAWs and production took the form of mash-ups, bootleg remixes, and DJ mixes. Artists like Animal Collective, MIA, Kanye West, and Daft Punk for whom sampling was a pillar of their creative process were extremely influential. Elite Gymnastics was no exception - the first song of ours to gain traction online was “Is This On Me?” which made no attempt to hide the fact that it heavily sampled Faye Wong’s “Eyes On Me.” The fact that it was so difficult to make money off MP3s pushed people to make different creative decisions than they would have otherwise. It was sort of a free-for-all.

Eventually, all of this started to change. The major labels started getting a lot more aggressive about trying to destroy MP3 file-sharing culture. Platforms like MegaUpload were raided and taken offline. The replacements that sprung up to replace them were increasingly infested with ads and malware. Corporate platforms like YouTube and SoundCloud adopted Content ID filters to prevent the proliferation of copyrighted music there. Blogs and private torrent trackers being taken down meant thousands of hours of labor were wiped out in an instant. Some of the best archives of the history of recorded music ever created were destroyed without hesitation. Even the most devoted participants lost the will to keep repairing and re-making the stuff that cops and record companies kept obliterating.

Josh and I both dreamed of being able to make a living as musicians. We still do. Back then, we were willing to accept a lot of changes in order to make that possible, which seemed necessary. A lot of the stuff that we were great at just didn’t make any money. Once, we were asked to do a remix of a song called “Sa Sa Samoa” by the band Korallreven. I did the remix by myself, which was normal for us, and Josh was so inspired by it that he spent a week working non-stop to create a video for it. People loved it - the day the video dropped, Pitchfork designated the song as a “Best New Track” and New York Magazine wrote about it in their “Approval Matrix.” The video led to a ton of exposure, but from a financial perspective, it just did not make sense to put that much effort into promoting a remix of someone else’s song. The stuff we were personally excited by just seemed to have less and less to do with what actually makes money.

A lot of internet bands during this era began to palpably shapeshift in an effort to succeed in music as a career. Artists who’d first attracted notice for sample-based bangers they made on a laptop started posing with vintage hardware in their press photos and trading in their laptops for live bands and recording studios. It became harder to distribute DJ mixes or mash-ups that contained copyrighted music in them. Influential bloggers either closed up shop or were absorbed into the traditional music industry in some way. Feeds that once touted bizarre songs by laptop-toting weirdos with no industry connections started to become populated mostly by artists with labels and publicists. The bottom rungs of festival lineups started to consist mostly of new major label signings who have lots of money to spend on stage production but not much in the way of grassroots fan enthusiasm or media buzz. 

Internet music and what people tend to refer to as “indie music” split off into two separate streams. Today, there’s a pretty intense firewall between internet culture and whatever you want to call the culture of vinyl records, mid-sized indie labels with publicists, and positive reviews from the few remaining websites that still pay people to write about music. I call it “publicist indie,” “lifestyle techno,” or “prestige electronica” depending on whether or not the music features guitars and/or vocals. The recent online kerfuffle about NFTs really emphasized this split. The worlds of digital illustration and game development campaigned aggressively against mass adoption of cryptocurrency - if you saw any Medium posts explaining crypto’s environmental issues, chances are they were written by someone from those fields. Every new announcement by an artist that they had minted an NFT was met with a swift and vocal backlash from fans. Though I’ve never really been much of an Aphex Twin fan, it was still pretty startling to look at the replies under his NFT announcement tweet and see hundreds of furious people announcing that he was now dead to them. That’s an artist who has seemed more or less unimpeachable for most of my life up until this point! All of that seemed to change in an instant.

There is a massive disconnect between the insular world of the industry establishment and the cutting edge of online counterculture. We saw this again a couple of weeks ago with the online response to the crisis in Gaza. We saw passionate advocacy for Palestinians from games journalists and developers much more often than we saw it from musicians. This is a very serious problem for music! I do not believe it is possible to please both sides - that is to say, I do not believe it is possible to be part of internet counterculture and the industry establishment simultaneously. The music industry is too conservative, too compromised, too corrupt. If it weren’t for the ocean of valuable copyrights that labels are sitting on, most of them would be bankrupt within a year. If the industry was forced to live or die based on how they handle what’s happening right now in the present, it would most assuredly die. The only people who don’t realize this are those who are being paid to stay ignorant. 

Josh and I did not know this back then. From where we were standing, it looked like internet culture and established media industries were on track to converge. A career in the arts seemed genuinely, tantalizingly possible, right up until the moment that it no longer did. 

In my case, I had really been struggling up until that point. My life had been this ongoing sequence of evictions and hospitalizations, and it seemed to be getting worse, not better. I donated plasma twice a week to pay for groceries and while I was sitting there with a giant needle stuck in my left arm for an hour I would see my picture in The Fader or my songs being recommended by one of the Kings of Leon on Twitter or whatever. Music seemed like the only thing the world thought I was any good at. It felt like my only chance at a peaceful, happy life was somewhere out there in a world I could only perceive through a laptop screen. 

Gender, for me, was a big factor in all of this. The more invested in the craft of songwriting I became, the harder it was to repress or ignore my gender stuff. At that time I’m not sure I even knew what the word “transgender” meant - I just knew that when I showed up at a venue wearing a skirt, no one would talk to me or look me in the eye, and that reading about people like Anohni or Terre Thaemlitz or on the internet made me feel like if I could get out of Minneapolis maybe I could find a place where people would accept me. The internet was like, a pretty toxic place for someone in my position. When I tried to find people to talk to about what I was feeling, nobody tried to tell me to read Judith Butler or ask me what pronouns I preferred. The internet was just like, overrun with predators who just wanted to fetishize me and exploit me. Music seemed like the only way I’d ever have an actual life as myself. I was desperate for that. I was well and truly desperate.

Between all the big changes that were happening to us individually and the music industry moving farther and farther away of the anarchic free-for-all of MP3 file-sharing culture, the strain on us just got to be too much. We stopped trusting each other. We became the unstoppable force and the immovable object, crashing haphazardly against one another’s resolve in a dazzling display of youthful futility. Our partnership ended, and after finishing out the remaining live shows on the calendar by myself, I retired the name “Elite Gymnastics” and started making music on my own under other names. That was that.

Q: Why is Elite Gymnastics coming back now, then?

A: Over the years, Josh and I eventually started talking again. Though there was a lot we did agree on, and potential future projects were discussed, nothing truly felt right. We haven’t been in the same room since Summer 2012, and we’ve both changed a lot since then. We both have other projects and we’ve both developed other ways of working since we stopped working together. It’s a pretty big commitment to put all of that aside in order to join your fortunes together with someone you haven’t seen in a decade.

Recently, Josh decided to leave Elite Gymnastics. His reasons are his own, and I was very surprised by his decision, but after having had time to adjust, I’m really grateful to him. I had kept these songs at a distance for many years, because it seemed foolish to allow myself to get too attached to songs I didn’t feel like I was allowed to think of as mine, if that makes any sense. The songs felt like casualties of a conflict that I had to bury in the ground and try to forget about. Being able to embrace them again felt like re-growing a severed limb or having a loved one come back to life, almost. Feeling like it was safe to love these songs again made me feel whole in a way I didn’t expect to. I became really excited by the prospect of revisiting them, so that’s what I decided to do.

Q: Does this mean you’re going to put RUIN back on Spotify?

A: No. Taking the record off Spotify was the right thing to do. That record was only ever intended to exist during the era of MP3 piracy. I never envisioned a world where the music industry would be so aggressive about policing the way that copyrighted music is allowed to exist online. If we hadn’t opted to take the record down when we did, someone would inevitably have forced us to. If you want to hear those specific recordings again, you’re going to have to do it the way we originally intended: by downloading MP3 files from the internet. Try SoulSeek.

Q: What’s next for Elite Gymnastics, then?

A: Here’s the situation currently. There is no Elite Gymnastics music available to stream or purchase in an official capacity anywhere on the internet. It wouldn’t really be possible for me to put the old stuff on Spotify or Bandcamp now because of all the samples. Like I said before, it was a different time. Those records were created to thrive on a past version of the internet that no longer exists. They weren’t designed to be compatible with the 2021 internet.

Technically, Elite Gymnastics didn’t ever release a debut album. We had EPs, a compilation, and a remix collection. We didn’t make an album, a record that existed as the distillation of all that experimentation that contained all of the songs that fans of the EPs would want to hear, all in one place. It’s like we did Good Fridays but stopped before we made My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy.

So, I am currently working on the first Elite Gymnastics album. If you were following my stuff as Default Genders, you may have noticed me posting demos on my SoundCloud page from 2015-2018 that were all eventually reworked into the album Main Pop Girl 2019. The album I am making is taking that approach to all the old EG songs, including some unreleased stuff. I’m collaborating with others on some songs and I honestly feel like it has resulted in some of the best and most exciting music I have ever been involved with. It is a drastic reinvention, but iteration and reinvention have always been a big part of what I do. I want to make something that feels like the culmination of everything that came before, and so far, I think I’m succeeding.

Q: When will I be able to hear this new music?

At a virtual fundraiser on June 4th, 2021, where there is a suggested donation of $10. You can access it at quietyear.com