#when i reread this tomorrow i might delete it

[spfswithchipotlemayo]

Kevin and thea? Questionable at best legal yikes at worst

BUT

Thea literally didn't talk to Kevin for a year and a half when he ghosted her after breaking his hand "skiing" when she's literally an Olympic athlete in her mid 20's and came in guns blazing and Kevin still pulled?? Honestly idk if that makes it worse on her part

[annabtg]

A piece of advice often given to writers is "just write; you can always edit later."

It's good advice, but with a caveat: you can't always edit later. You have to know how to edit.

Editing is a different skill from writing. Only recently have I managed to edit my own writing; up until the last few months it was either write it correctly the first time around or get a beta to edit it for me/tell me what to fix.

And as I'm editing/rewriting a scene right now, I wanted to share with you some tips I've picked up from practice and other resources.

A. STYLE

- Run grammar and spell check. If you haven't already. Personally, I like to look these things up as I write, but I suppose some of you might prefer to write your stream of consciousness first and edit later. Whatever works. (Just please run your check at some point. It's crucial.)

- Read out loud. You can find from missing commas to typos to stilted dialogue if you check how your writing rolls off the tongue.

- Count your adjectives, your adverbs and your -ings. Not to keep score, obviously; but these are parts of speech that are best used in moderation. If there are three adverbs in one line of text, you might need to eliminate one or two.

- Use your thesaurus. Again, in moderation. Look for oft-repeated or very trite words and replace them. If there are no working synonyms and you're still being too repetitive, consider a full rephrase.

B. CONTENT

- Be prepared to lose content. You might be forced to edit out a turn of phrase you like or a background detail that's not necessary for your story. Make your peace with it. Do try to work it in if you like it, but don't do it at the expense of your story. This is the cornerstone of editing.

- Don't hard delete. Keep your previous drafts. They may come in handy.

- Apply the writing tips you're given. For instance, "show, don't tell". Look for instances of telling that could be improved by showing, and rework. (Not going to get into an exhausting list of these.)

- Check the purpose of the scene. Every scene you write has a purpose, be it plot-wise, characterization-wise, setting up the scene for something or whatever else - otherwise you wouldn't be writing it. Read the scene again: does it do what you want it to do? If not, focus on your goal: what would be another way to achieve it? And work from there.

- Count your dialogue, introspection, and descriptions. This depends on your style too, but sometimes the problem with a scene may be that it's too heavy on one or the other. Often, I may not be in my best writing shape, but a dialogue pops in my head; I write it down to use as my guide, then when it's editing time, I add the details around it.

- Reread your previous scenes. It will help you get more in touch with your story and style and perhaps give you ideas such as what you can address that you haven't already.

- Mimic your favourite writers. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. If something doesn't work for you, think: How would X write it? What would they tell me to change if they read it? Don't worry, you won't get nearly close enough for it to be a problem. 😋

- Be prepared to rewrite. Sometimes editing just doesn't cut it; you have to rewrite from scratch. Paste your previous draft where you can't see it and start again.

C. GENERAL

- Take some distance. Look at your writing again tomorrow, or next week, if you can afford to. I know when my writing is fresh I am too attached to it. A week later, I am much more likely to edit out a sentence that doesn't work even if I really like the fancy verb I chose to use in it.

- Be aware of time and circumstance. Not all days are good for editing. You may be too tired one evening; you may need another cup of coffee one morning; you may be too aware of your pending chores one day. Don't force it; give it another shot when you're in a better state of mind.

- Write down your comments. Too often, we feel something is not good but we don't know why. Write down your comments as if you'd explain to someone what you don't like about it, then come back to it.

- Get a beta. Boy, do I know it's hard! But a good beta is a (all right, figurative) life-saver. Ask around, or ask a friend. I'm not saying don't post unless you get a beta, but I'm telling you it's not a shame to ask for help. I literally never post without at least getting someone to read my work first, even if all they are equipped to say is "It was good, I liked it."

- Beta for others. It's easier to spot what needs fixing in a piece that's not your own. You don't have to be super experienced, catch every single mistake, or produce a professional result; just read and comment on what feels off, explaining why (so that it's easier for the writer to know how to fix it). It's good practice, and you help someone.

I hope this will be of use to some of you! Happy editing!

[nanowrimo]

Pro Tips from a NaNo Coach: Getting Through the Muddy Middle of Your Novel

NaNoWriMo can seem like a daunting task sometimes, for NaNo newbies and veterans alike. Fortunately, our NaNo Coaches are here to help guide you through November! Today, author Peng Shepherd is here to share her advice on how to set yourself up for noveling success:

Welcome to the middle stretch of the NaNoWriMo challenge! Whether this is your first NaNoWriMo or you’re a seasoned, ink-stained veteran, and whether you started strong right out of the gate or it took you a little bit of time to warm up, we’re well on our way with this journey now—and reality might be starting to set in. 

Beginnings are the easiest part of a novel, I’ve always thought. It’s just you and the blank page and your excitement. Anything is possible! You can do whatever you want! It’s easy to lay down words in a frenzy because you’re building from nothing, so nothing has to make sense, nothing has to pay off, yet. You’re just trying to get from “zero” to “something” as fast as you can. 

And then eventually, far in the future, the ending of the novel will come. And at that moment, even if you’re exhausted, you’ll have so much momentum and you’ll know your characters and story so well that you’ll be hurtling toward that finish line—possibly even faster than when you started the story, full of inspiration and still unsinged by the first flames of burnout.

It’s the middles the are the hardest.

Those meandering, saggy, slow middles.

The problem with middles is that by this point in the manuscript, your draft actually might be starting to look like a book-shaped thing. And while this is great in terms of progress, it’s also really tough in terms of morale. Because for the first time, there’s finally enough material that you can see how messy, confusing, and seemingly unsalvageable what you already have is… and also how much farther you still have to go. 

Then, life gets in the way. You miss a day or two, and fall behind on word count. A work emergency happens, or your laptop goes on the fritz. Friends need help, you realize you have to delete ten pages, then the roof starts leaking. And your plot still doesn’t make any sense, your characters won’t behave, and you have no idea how to fix any of it. You’re lost, you’re exhausted, and you’re still nowhere near the finish line—how did you think you were ever going to write something as gigantic as entire novel? It’s impossible!

There’s a little piece of advice I give myself at overwhelming moments like these:

When the goal or the pressure feels too big, go small. Really small.

A book is a huge thing. It’s way too big to hold in your head like that! Trying to face a goal of that size every single day you sit down can crush you.

So, don’t think about the whole picture. I like to tell myself, I’m not writing a book today. Or, I’m not writing a first draft today. Or even, I’m not writing a chapter today. Instead, I tell myself, I’m just writing this next scene, or, I’m just changing her location from Chicago to San Francisco. 

Or, in this case, I’m just writing 1,667 words today (or whatever your session goal is).

This advice helps me remember that I indeed do not have to write the entire book in one day. I just have to write a single scene, or fix a single thing. I’ll worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. And I’ll worry about whether the draft any good or not, or how to revise it, even later than that.

So, if you’ve been struggling lately or feeling crushed under the weight of your goal, I invite you to try this tactic. Right now, or after work, or later tonight, find a few minutes and open up that laptop or notebook. Don’t reread what you wrote last time and start tinkering to make it better, don’t review your outline to confirm things are still making sense, don’t take stock of your progress to see how much you have left. Don’t think about the rest of the manuscript and how it all has to connect. Just think about the part that’s right in front of you. The scene that you’re in right now.

Remember, you’re not writing a whole book today. You’re not writing a whole chapter today, even. 

You’re just writing this one small scene.

Now, onward! Because the only way out of a middle is through it.

Peng Shepherd was born and raised in Phoenix, Arizona, and has lived in Beijing, Kuala Lumpur, London, New York, and Mexico City. Her second novel, The Cartographers, became a national bestseller, was named a Best Book of March by The Washington Post, and received a fellowship from the National Endowment for the Arts. Her debut, The Book of M, won the Neukom Institute for Literary Arts Award, and was chosen as a best book of the year by Amazon, Elle, Refinery29, and The Verge, as well as a best book of the summer by the Today show and NPR’s On Point.

[anangelcalledinquisitor]

I posted 13,563 times in 2022

That's 5,076 more posts than 2021!

260 posts created (2%)

13,303 posts reblogged (98%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@zaidnovi

@ebonykain

@theluckythreeleafclover

@dgcakes

@ibijau

I tagged 2,597 of my posts in 2022

#the inquisitor speaks - 184 posts

#holding the world - 148 posts

#my writing - 106 posts

#moon/sun/reader - 92 posts

#raising starlings - 81 posts

#talking about my writing - 40 posts

#fnaf moon - 32 posts

#svsss - 31 posts

#fnaf security breach - 30 posts

#fnaf sb - 28 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#because some things i get flustered about writing and i don't know if you're ever like stop looking for ten minutes this part's embarrassin

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I hate it when you’re trying to write something and you only have like... a passing knowledge of the thing you’re writing?  and your brain screeches to a halt and like...

DOES DJ MUSIC MAN HAVE A FUCKING VOICE???  I can’t watch any more video playthroughs because someone else controlling the camera tends to give me motionsickness...  Can anyone just answer this question for me?  I don’t want to play tonight (because I’ll be here all fucking night) and I want to finish this chapter so I can go to the zoo tomorrow without feeling guilty, and this scene won’t... leave... me... alone...

@twinanimatronics @dana-chan-the-control-brain @femme-enby (I don’t know who all might be able to answer this and/or might be awake, you can ignore my screaming into the void

91 notes - Posted July 8, 2022

#4

I read your fic today and I just ADORE IT.

So I made you some doodles...hope you like em!

This one is based off that "husky saying no" tiktok. Because I think the further along Y/N gets, the more his security protocols demand he guard her instead of the Pizzaplex.

Bonus doodle:

See the full post

114 notes - Posted June 23, 2022

#3

Me: I'm just going to finish Security Breach and see how it goes from here.

Me: oh i can explore a little better now with the mods! Let's get a good look all around the daycare, for science.

Me: OH NO THERE'S AN ELEVATOR IN THE DAYCARE! I made my YN take the stairs their whole pregnancy for no reason...

Me, sees the elevators are all out of order: .... That tracks.

124 notes - Posted July 17, 2022

#2

To my writer moots (and artist moots and all ND folks too), I'm just curious if I'm weird about this:

Does anyone else take screenshots of the nice things people have said about your stuff, to like read later, especially when dealing with feelings of imposter syndrome, self-doubt, and the feelings of "i should just delete all my stuff online, it's all terrible and no one actually likes it and no one has said anything because they're all too nice about it"?

(but then i reread comments and like??? That many people can't be wrong, right??? And these are just the ones on the final chapter, not including the ones on any of the other 25 chapters)

See the full post

124 notes - Posted July 26, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Precious Time (future scene for Holding the World, my indulgent FNAF Security Breach AU with a pregnant reader and super sweet boys). This picture is going to be in a future chapter, and a version of it is in the Bad Ending that i posted, though in that version, Sun cut moon out of the picture. I might do both, haven't decided yet. Sitting at work, i can sort of work on writing but some of it just has to wait until I get home.

(bald Moon bald Moon bald Moon bald -)

146 notes - Posted June 23, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[theconstantsidekick]

BABES

I’ve been rereading everything in the staticverse bc it’s honestly become like such a great source of comfort for me and ily so much for it.

but as i was rereading i was struck by just HOW MUCH i love it. so i compiled a little list for you 💗

1. you have put absolutely insane amounts of detail into this and i appreciate it so fucking much you have no idea. there is layers upon layers upon layers of lore and plot connections and just UGH.

2. static. that’s it. end of story. just static.

2.2 okay so i know that you have your concerns about creating a reader that might be interpreted as “too similar” to the author but fuck that it’s bullshit. this is your work this is your creation you get to do whatever the fuck you want with it.

2.3 also static is such a badass and it’s honestly so refreshing to see a x reader fanfic where she isn’t a total mary sue or just the human embodiment of a slice of white bread. static is NOT BLAND she is NOT BORING. she has her faults she has her flaws and it makes her so much more relatable as a character. it’s so much easier to like step into the readers shoes when they’re a fully fleshed out character as opposed to a blank slate to project yourself onto. the way that you write static and her interactions with everyone around her is honestly on a whole other level and i like cant describe it it’s just so ajsjfosnsnajakakadjd

3. adding onto my like static and her interactions thing, dude. the way you portray her relationships with each different character so differently and yet so HER is insane. it shows how phenomenally multifaceted she is and i just genuinely love it

4. whenever the story is being “narrated” by a different character, your writing changes tone so well without losing its quality. there’s a stark (haha get it) difference between the way tony narrates as opposed to say steve or harley or even static herself and that’s something that i love with my entire fucking heart. you’re able to so seamlessly blend these characters together to create a beautiful tapestry of a world within the MCU and have i mentioned that i love it?

5. the EFFORT you put into this is unparalleled. like genuinely you could wake up tomorrow and say “im done writing this forever” and delete all of your work and i would still be happy that i got to be a small part of it. everything about the way that you world built and character developed and connected events is just SO GOOD LIKE????

6. this is embarrassing lowkey but static has like become my personality now? if im in a situation where im nervous or intimidated i just think about the avengers ft static when she goes to recruit Steve and he says something along the lines of “people didn’t hold themselves like that unless they were truly very sure of themselves” (i BUTCHERED that ik and im so sorry about it but i hope you know what point im referencing) and it like HELPS A LOT!!!

7. i originally read this bc im a slut for bucky barnes but i adore the way that it’s expanded to become more of just a series about static herself. you’ve developed such an interesting and exciting character that just like reading about what she ate for breakfast would make my month. and i will shamelessly admit that when she said “steve wasn’t the love of her life, bucky isn’t the love of her life, morgan is the love of her life” (again butchering the quote i am so disappointed in myself) i teared up. bc like while i am simply a hole made special for james barnes it was just so nice to see that this was a (cliché alert) strong, independent, female character who’s life didn’t revolve around a love interest. and no one looks for that in x reader fanfiction but it’s such a blessing that you were able to make it and i was able to find it.

8. this series and these fics are literally like free therapy and i love you more than static loves morgan, harley, and peter

sorry for the essay but i need you to know that i love you so so so so much.

im right behind you babe ❤️❤️❤️

when I tell you, I sobbed on a random tuesday morning after reading this....

I had been feeling really fucking shitty and then I woke up, i read this, first thing in the morning and honestly? Depression? Cured. Skin? Cleared. Laundry? Folded.

This was so personal to me. I just.. I cannot express how much this means to me, no matter how hard I try. It moves me so much that you noticed all the little information I had scattered throughout the story thinking like, 'oh this will be a fun callback when i read it later' only to find out you were following along!!!! This is literally the best feeling ever.

Whenever I'm having a shit day, questioning my 'talents' at work (because my job is in a similar zone) I come back to read this and I'm like yeah, well. @third-broparcelicito loved my shit so I cannot be that bad lmao.

Anyway, all this is to say, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading whatever content I put out and investing your time, energy and love into it so deeply. I swear people like you are the only reason I keep coming back to the series and updating it randomly. You keep me going despite my overly busy schedule. Thank you so so much.

I'm right behind you. I've got your back.

[i-can-even-burn-salad]

25, 34, and 41 for your latest ask game?

-verkja

Thank you for the ask! From this ask game.

25.  Favourite part of writing

Having a finished piece I can reread and think “This is it! :)”

Bonus points if I still think that way days or even months later. I guess this couples with the fact that before I get it onto paper, I rotate it in my head for ages - scenes, ideas, alternate versions, dialogue snippets. The moment it’s down, my brain stops rotating it and I can just access what I have decided on.

There are a lot of silly daydream things that never got this far, and sometimes I am sad that I have forgotten most of them, so I am super happy if I manage to write them down.

(Also making people cry <3)

41.  Any advice for new/beginning/young writers?

(In general for all my advice it’s for “write because you want to”, not “write to earn money”, because for that, it would be rather different.)

Read. Especially if you want to write books, read the genre you want to write in. I’m not saying to take a book and study how it’s built (though you could certainly do that with some of your favorite novels!), but just like... read. Books. Many of them. You’ll soak up so much.

While I would say that a lot of “rules” can be bent and ignored (show, don’t tell/adverbs/voice/etc), there are two things you should get a grip on early:

Point of view. Understand the differences. Understand which one you want to use. This site gives an overview. The difference between first and third person is probably not too hard to figure out ;) but the difference between omniscient and limited especially is important. No one can stop you from head-jumping (writing in a limited pov, then suddenly switching characters without warning), and if you want to do it, you do you, but you should at least be aware of what you are doing.

Punctuation. Especially of dialogue, but also otherwise. If you are not a native English speaker, don’t assume it’s the same as in your native language. This is a very cool site to help. It’s so damn annoying to get rid of a wrong habit.

Never delete your writing, in a fit of rage or otherwise. Throw stuff into the deepest corner of your desktop, never look at it again, put it on a usb drive and lock it in a drawer, but don’t just delete because you’re in a bad mood. Perhaps tomorrow or next week the world looks different. Perhaps someone likes your fic and you want to pick it up again. Perhaps years will pass and one day you want to go back to it. Perhaps you don’t. Perhaps it’ll work as a first draft again. Perhaps it won’t. A while ago I looked at things I wrote almost 20 years ago, and sure, I wanted to die a bit, and also what are paragraphs, but it’s cool that I can.

ALWAYS BACKUP. Don’t trust your hard drive, don’t trust your phone, don’t trust google docs/drive. And for fucks sake, don’t trust Tumblr.

Feedback is important - and not every feedback is the right feedback for you. Especially when asking friends or family, they might not be into that genre. If you write whump, and someone says “do you have to be so brutal” the answer is “yes! sorry it’s not for you then”. If someone says “Hey, uh, so where did that weapon come from, he didn’t have a bag”, that’s something different. Before taking any feedback that isn’t spelling/grammar into account, consider if the person giving it is your target audience. And even if they are, feel free to ignore everyone who isn’t civil about it :)

Which leads me to “write what you know” doesn’t necessarily mean “write exactly what you have experienced yourself”. I sure as fuck hope not every thriller author is a serial killer. But you can learn about things and research them - especially if the story you tell is not your own. Again, no one can stop you if you want to write whatever. But if you want to tell a happy story about an ace kid, and you are not an ace kid yourself, and you put in stereotypes and things that would hurt ace kids, ask yourself who you are writing the story for then? If your answer is in any way “well for ace kids!” you might want to reconsider. (This obviously applies to a lot of things like sexuality, race, disabilities, etc.)

"Everything has been done before” and “Only you can write your story the way you do” are ideas that can coexist. On a broad scale, the core of every story has been told before; be a hero, save the world, destroy the world, fall in love, destroy each other, find the killer. That doesn’t mean your personal spin on it, in this world, with those characters and twists, isn’t worth telling. It is. You ever finished a really good book and thought “wow I sure hope nothing like this exists”? - don’t think so.

For the last question: Under the cut for the last question and mention of fictional torture, fictional sexual assault (unsuccessful) and other unpleasant things.

34.  What was the hardest scene you ever had to write?

Oh boyyy... second time that question.

For one. Every “first” I guess. Every time I went a bit darker than before; the first time I turned my injuries a bit more graphic than strictly common in my preferred genre. The first time I burned Caldyn’s eyes. The first time I decided to write “whump” after knowing of the term, even though the piece (first part of Caldyn’s recovery arc) was rather tame despite some graphic descriptions of injuries he has. The first time I went all out on the torture.

Like, sure, it has haunted my daydreams for years, but I never put it into words, with my own fingers, black on white on my lil keyboard. That was hard at first. Trying to find the balance between “I want this a bit gory” and “I don’t want it over the top”, coupled with the internalized worry of “but what would my mother think”. Hi mom, if you can see this, please get off Tumblr, I love you.

Currently, I am dreading the editing rounds for 2-3 parts in Glass Shards Arc 2. There are two almost sexual assault scenes, which contain some crude language I don’t usually use, and some aftermath in which she will probably say some hurtful things. Same as with disability, I wanna do it respectfully while (luckily!) not affected. It’s hard and I’m procrastinating by writing a novella or two.

[ashlee-bonfamille-lyons]

Today is New {Cutie}

Ashlee Makes a much needed change.

TW: Gaslighting, Verbal Abuse

When: June 10th

Where It All Began: Roommate Trouble  {Edric/Ashleigh/Finn} Lingering Anixiety {Finn/Nemo}   Tomorrow Doesn’t Change {The Ashley’s} Taking A Chance {Edric/Finn} A Haunting Past {Tiny Dancers}

@ashleigh-inyourdreams

Ashlee

Ashlee had sat at home for awhile, before remembering she had a huge dance final to prepare for and she threw herself into that. It was easier than focusing on the fact that she finally had to make a choice and in the pit of her stomach Ashlee wasn’t sure she made the right one.

Ashlee hadn’t deleted Nemo’s texts and infact constantly re-read them, and no matter how many times she reread them there was always a sharp pain in her chest from making the decision that she did.

If it wasn’t for the constant presence of Simba and Berlioz in the house. Too many dogs and Juni, Ashlee might have hid in her closet when faced with any other potential decision.

It was only after many sleepless nights that Ashlee knew what she needed to do even as scared as she was that she would be alone after this. 

Still this is something she needed to do, not because of Finn (She still didn’t care about him) or Nemo. But because if she didn’t she would constantly be in this precarious spot.

Picking up Ashleigh a drink at Hatter’s she made her way to Ashleigh’s dorm to rip off the bandaid so to speak.

“Hey can we talk?”

ASHLEIGH: 

She hadn’t expected to see Ashlee. 

For Ashleigh, life was the same as it ever was. She didn’t look forward, simply fluttered from day to day, following her instincts and more than anything– her appetite. Today, she’d already had lunch with Henry, thus checking the Henry shaped box. She’d see him later when they went to sleep. That meant the rest of the day was her own. 

And so she was doing something that she rarely did these days– needlepoint. She had fashioned the thread from a shadow underneath a child’s bed. It glistened a rich violet as she turned it into the portrait of a flower. With thorns of course.

Then there was a knock on her door.

She opened it, blinked, then smiled– duh. Because she was happy to see her girls, any one of them. “TT!” she gasped. “What a surprise! Come in! I didn’t miss a text or anything right?” 

Ashlee

Ashlee shook her head, she hadn’t texted just in case she had lost the courage to do anything, to make this move. If she didn’t text it gave her an out to run back home. Even now the urge to just tuck tail and gossip was so much stronger.

Nothing had to change. Nemo made his decision so why did she have to lose her friends over him.

Because it was the right thing to do.

Such an annoying thought process.

“No I um didn’t text.” Still Ashlee stepped in and handed Ashleigh her drink. “I wanted to stop by and talk, figured I’d pick up something on the way.”

ASHLEIGH: 

Stop by and talk. 

Normally, this was not a sign for distress. Maybe for other people. Maybe for girls and their silly boyfriends, or boys and their silly girlfriends. But the Ashleys had a connection beyond such mortal ties. Ashleigh thought of it as a soul bond. There was nothing that Ashlee couldn’t say to her, because they were of one mind. 

So whatever she wanted to talk about– and it did seem kind of serious– Ashleigh was there for her.

She took the drink and ushered her in. “Well that’s sweet of you. Just take a seat wherever, you know the drill.” 

Ashleigh went over to her bed and took a sip of her black coffee. Bitter. Just the way she liked it. “So what’s up?” 

Ashlee

You know the drill. Yes Ashlee did. This is where she aired her grievances and they plotted to destroy the person. After all, if one of them was hurt the rest of them were as well. Why didn’t anyone else get that, No one else had ride or dies the way the Ashley’s were. They were limited by morals. They wouldn’t go to the ends of the earth for each other.

Afterall Nemo was willing to choose someone over her, Everyone would choose someone over her. Ashleigh wouldn’t.

Ashleigh would always choose the girls.

Unless Ashlee disagreed, that’s what happened last time, she had started to disagree and Ashleigh grew colder and more distant. 

“I don’t want to be part of the bullying anymore. Not to anyone. I want to leave that behind us in Secondary and move on. We can be so much better than that.” Though did that include Henry too?

100% in or 100% out. No in between. That had to include Henry even if he was Henry.

ASHLEIGH: 

Ashleigh blinked. 

She honestly didn’t know what Ashlee meant, at first. Because ‘bullying’ was such a…childish way to put what the Ashleys did. They didn’t bully. No, they ruled. They simply turned wherever they went into a castle and everyone else was their subordinates. They did that with lies or bribery or flattery and yeah, sometimes cruelty. But they did it for each other. They did it for themselves. They did it because they were better than anyone. 

Bullying? So simple and flat. Not at all up to her own standard. 

“I’m confused,” said Ashleigh. She tilted her head. She’d played dumb before but never to Ashlee. Still, it was a game she knew well. “What are you talking about? I have no idea what you mean.” 

Ashlee

Ashlee raised an eyebrow at her friend, Ashleigh wasn’t stupid, no arguably Ashleigh was the brightest of them all. On the drop of a pin she could spin whatever tale she needed to fit her story. Ashleigh never played dumb to Ashlee and for once Ashlee was irritated at her friend.

“Whatever you want to call it Ashleigh. I want us to stop. I don’t want to be part of it anymore and I want to still spend time with you and everyone. But I also can be around others that are going to be cruel to others.” Ashlee had no problem being better than everyone. She still thought she was better than everyone but she could do that without stomping on every light.

ASHLEIGH: 

That faux clueless look faded. And Ashleigh’s lips became a thin line, her dark eyes even darker. She’d never looked at Ashlee like that before. 

She had never felt like this toward Ashlee before. 

Her heart had turned into a thick chunk of ice. Ashley A was gone– flown off to better skies, abandoning them (okay, not really, but Ashleigh couldn’t help but feel like it). Ashle B had her fancy internships. Now Ashlee T. was pulling this? Why? What prompted it? Who got to her? Why did she want to leave Ashleigh too when Ashleigh had never been anything but loyal? 

“So what are you saying?” asked Ashleigh. And she chuckled. “I’m not allowed to be myself anymore? Is that it? Because I hurt people’s feelings?” She took a step toward Ashlee. “Because I say the things everyone else is too scared to say? I’m a mara, Tiny. What do you want me to do? Starve?” 

Ashlee

Ashlee had never been insulted by her nickname before but now she almost wanted to cower at it. Like she was tiny and small and didn’t know what she was doing.

But she did know what she was doing. She had prompted this conversation, she had done this in private and one on one. Ashlee had thought this through so she could handle this. Because she could.

“I’m not talking about dreams and nightmares. If that’s what you need to survive I’m not saying don’t. But in person, in this awakeness. Whatever difference you want to call it. I don’t want to be cruel to others anymore. I don’t want to have to flinch when Ashley A makes a mean comment on twitter or when you show up at Finn’s room because haha it’s so funny he’s still scared. I don’t want that anymore.” Ashleigh took her steps forward but Ashlee wouldn’t back down. “Why can’t we just do that all together.”

ASHLEIGH: 

She scoffed, like Ashlee had made a bad joke. She sort of had. 

Because Ashleigh still didn’t know how to be anything but this. Oh sure, she could play sweet and innocent and good girl, but only to some kind of an end– only to get something. She didn’t want to change either. Why look the other way if she could lash out? Why simper when she knew she could get ahead? She wanted power, she wanted attention, she wanted people to grovel in front of her– all these things that she’d never had when she had been a little girl!

That last part didn’t belong to her, but to the girl she had been before she was reborn a mara. That girl. She wanted revenge. 

Ashleigh hadn’t even gotten started yet. 

“Why the sudden change of heart?” Ashleigh asked instead of answering. “I’ve been this way since we were eight, Ashlee. I pushed girls down who called you a freak for immigrating here. I made you laugh when they cried. So what’s so different now?” 

Ashlee

Questions like this were a double edged sword, she could sell out all the reasons, Simba, Berlioz, Nemo, the rest of the among us group even if they rarely played anymore. She could sell them out and give Ashleigh a reason to hate them more.

So she couldn’t. Because she knew Ashleigh, and she would just be giving her ammo, even if she was sure Ashleigh Q, already knew all the reasons.

“It’s not sudden. I’ve been balancing who I’ve wanted to be since my Baba. I’ve been helping make excuses even though I stopped wanting to be part of this so long ago. There’s a reason I knew I couldn’t live with you after my Mom left. I felt it even when I was helping Ashley A with her trial because she deserved it. I just want to prove to people I’m better than them, not throw them there mentally.”

ASHLEIGH: There’s a reason I knew I couldn’t live with you after my mom left. 

Ashleigh’s eyes flashed. And then she was cold everywhere. 

It didn’t really matter what Ashlee said after that. She’d just confirmed it. She had been leaving Ashleigh for over a year now– leaving her in bits and pieces, lying to her face, and to the rest of the Ashleys’ faces. Loyalty had meant everything to Ashleigh; it was why she hadn’t done so much worse to the people she knew that Ashlee cared about. But clearly, that hadn’t mattered. Ashlee didn’t want her. 

“Oh, so you think you’re better than me?” she took another step, glaring. “Just because you don’t say the mean thing to their face? You’re wrong. I can smell what makes a person weak, Tiny. Their fear and their selfishness and their greed.” She scoffed a second time as her eyes flicked up and down Ashlee’s slight frame. “And you’re rotten just like me. Through and through. I loved you anyway– I’m probably the only one who actually loves you for who you really are– but you think you’re better than me? You’re just a liar– the worst kind. Because you’re lying to yourself.” 

Ashlee

Ashlee stood her ground though she wanted to step back, flinch, but she wouldn’t give Ashleigh the upperhand. This is how it worked. This was the Ashlee she was in Secondary. Except this time the power didn’t come from the girls, it came from something inside of her.

“I don’t think I’m better than you but I think I’ve been lying to myself for a long time already Ashleigh. I don’t think this one is one of those times.” Ashlee stated taking a deep breath as those words cut and they cut deep because maybe no one would love her. Maybe after this she would be alone and afraid and she wouldn’t have anyone to turn to. Sure you had Simba and Berlioz but they were adulty adults.

Ashlee was sure she was never going to have a friendship like this, She saw it with Nemo and his group. Ian with his roommate and Eilonwy. There wasn’t space for her in those. So maybe she wouldn’t be loved by anyone else. But at least she might be able to be proud of her reflection in the mirror.

ASHLEIGH: 

Ashleigh expected Ashlee to tremble. She knew her friend and she knew her friend’s greatest fear: that she would be alone and unloved. 

But Ashlee didn’t back down or give in or say Ashleigh was right. Ashleigh’s own brow creased as the frustration built like magma inside her, melting all of her cold fury into something raw and hot. And Ashleigh only knew how to do one thing with her pain: make other people hurt. 

She wanted to scream. She wanted to hit Ashlee– and she imagined it, imagined her hand streaking through the air and smacking into Ashlee’s cheek. She’d cower and cry, triggered by all the times she’d been beaten before and then Ashleigh would win–

Her fist curled, but then she stopped. Her lip quivered instead, tears forming on the corners of her eye. No one had ever made her cry before. Not like this.

But she wouldn’t let a tear fall while Ashlee stood in front of her. As quickly as they’d come, they were pushed back again.

“Well, you don’t have to lie to yourself anymore then. Me, I’ve never lied to you– not about who I am,” she said. “And so no, Ashlee. I’m not going to behave for you. Neither will Ashley A or Ashle B. You’re the one who doesn’t belong anymore, sweetie.” 

Ashlee

Ashlee didn’t belong.

She knew she didn’t. This whole conversation was things Ashlee already knew but it hurt so much hearing it from one of the people she loved so dearly. That she would be cast aside because she didn’t belong. She had spited one of the girls and everyone knew how that went.

This was the end and any hope Ashlee had of keeping her girls was gone, She couldn’t take back any of her words now.

Ashlee searched her friend's face for any hint of that love they shared, for any hint that it wasn’t over. That they could take these next steps together.

“I love you Ashleigh. I do. With everything I am. I don’t want to lose you.”

ASHLEIGH: 

Ashleigh scoffed. Then she chuckled. Then, she laughed. 

What? It was so funny– Ashlee standing here with her big ol eyes, lying to herself, even now. But that plea fell through the air. Ashleigh didn’t feel it. Love meant nothing to her, not when Ashlee had already pulled her loyalty out from under her. There was only a hole left in Ashleigh’s heart. And even if Ashlee groveled on the carpet, Ashleigh wasn’t sure she could shove her friend back in there.

Because Ashleigh wasn’t lying. Ashlee didn’t belong anymore. She didn’t fit. 

“You don’t love me, Tiny,” she giggled, and reached out to smooth some of Ashlee’s hair behind her ear. “If you loved me, you wouldn’t have ever asked me to change. But this is who I am, and I’m not ashamed of that. But you are, right?” She put on a little pout. “You’re ashamed of me and how mean I am? Aw, boo hoo. I think it’s time for you to go.” 

Ashlee

Ashleigh was right though, love wasnt asking the other person to change. Love was accepting them. Maybe even Nemo didnt love her just by requiring this of her.

Well he didnt require it and Ashlee wasnt making this change for him so maybe it was fine. 

Maybe he would still love her after this.

She had never been on this side of Ashleigh before and she hated every second of it.

Closing her eyes at a gesture that used to mean so much love, Ashlee nodded her head as she tried to hold back her tears. She didnt want to cry, not here, not infront of others, she would get home and hide until she couldnt hide anymore.

"I'm not ashamed of you Ashleigh. But I'm not going to be able to convince you of that. Or I guess how much I love you and the others." Ashlee stated with a shakey breath and a nod as she pulled away.

"I guess I'll see you around." Ashlee stated turning to leave.

[gwen-tolios]

Things I've Learned Reviewing An AI-Generated Audiobook

Google will autonarrate a book for you using AI, and I'm currently going through the process with my book Tomorrow And Beyond. I'm learning things I figure other authors might want to know!

AI's will read alpharumeric strains oddly, and the likelihood of that increases if it includes a common abbreviation. For example, the AI read 'unit DR-572' as 'unit doctor dash 572' and 'unit D.R572' as 'unit D dot 572'. Make sure you check every one!

Repeated words, like in studdering dialog, 'That's, that's not true!' sound like the AI is glitching. I fixed it on a case-by-case basis by either removing one of the words or adding '...' between the words.

An AI won't emphasize italic words, all it has is timing, and it doesn't always match my idea of phrasing. I'm removing or adding commas all the time as I listen to the audiobook line by line in the UI.

Visual cues of things like text messages or bot actions are read aloud. '>>Downloading...' was read as 'greater than greater than Downloading' and man was that annoying. I deleted where appropriate.

Google AI does tend to treat five repetitions of the same thing '-----' or '#####' as a pause, which is exactly what I want for a scene break so that's a win

Oddly enough, it sometimes struggles with plurals. It read 'implant' currently, but 'implants' became 'implahnts'. I don't know how to fix that.

It also had problems with vowel shifts for past-tense. 'reread' became 'rereed' but it was fixed when I added a hyphen 're-read' so it used the past-tense pronunciation of 're-red'

I had to also spell resumes as 'rezumes', otherwise the word got read as the noun and not the verb.

Putting things in capital letters seems to cue the AI to use the letter names. 'Two am' is read as 'two ahm' while ' Two AM' is read as 'two A M'

The AI rushed through small lists, so 'four, three, two, one' felts way faster than the sentence preceding it. The fix is to replace the commas with periods, which then made it feel slow. But I'd rather than then a jumbled rush. Especially if I think it's rushed at normal speed and many people listen at a speed between 1.2x or 1.5x

Made up words might be read differently in different sentences. The AI read my alien race, 'modling' correct the first three times but switched up the first vowel the 4th and I had to correct pronunciation by spelling it 'mod-ling'. This suggests for future SFF words I create, I need to be very aware of where syllables land.

[lululawrence]

Hi! I just got done reading No One Likes to be Alone and I loved it! You mention at the beginning that you love nesting fics so if you don't mind sharing I would love to know what your favorite nesting fics are.

ahhhhhhhh thank youuuuu! and YES I SURE DO!!! oh there are some excellent ones out there. let’s see... favorites are hard for me, but here’s the best I can do for you (i’m grouping them by pairing, because most are larry, but not all... and please know that my absolute favorite nesting fic of all isn’t on this list because it was deleted and i CRY):

Larry

There's No Other Place by @nikogda - I LOVE THIS FIC VERY MUCH A LOT. i mean... hybrid a/b/o nesting. perfection! the entire world building in this fic is so incredibly detailed and cool and the VIBE is amazing. everything is fleshed out and so unique and interesting, but the incredibly personal vibe of the nesting!!!! i cannot even explain how much i love it. louis thinks he’s being SO SNEAKY and he is NOT but that’s okay. haha anyway, a great fic for sure and while the nesting isn’t the most important aspect, it’s definitely more than just a minor detail.

When Tomorrow Comes by @jacaranda-bloom - ALPHA. NESTING. ALPHA NESTING. HOW BRILLIANT???? i honestly could NOT believe i had struck gold when i saw this post hahaha i’d never even considered??? the WORLDS this fic opened for me, and it was done so so brilliantly. niall is sooooo shady, and poor harry doesn’t have a clue it’s even happening, and omg i just... this fic is amazing and it’s because of dee that i’m going to be exploring alpha nesting in at least two of my nesting series fics that i’ll be writing at some point lol highest honors and five gold stars to dee.

We Both Got Nothing to Hide by @chloehl10 - A SECRET NEST. oh gosh louis is SO ASHAMED. and harry’s shit just keeps going missing. but louis NEEDS HIS NEST. a;sdkgha;sdlkfjas zayn of course is the one who figures it out, cause he’s smart like that, but oh gosh the emotions connected to nesting in this one and the complex kind of... shame almost? it’s a suuuuper interesting worldbuilding detail that i really enjoyed exploring in this fic

Do Not Falter (There's a Star Ahead) by @londonfoginacup​ - christmas eve desperate cuddles and nesting!!! i looooove how louis doesn’t even think twice, he just lets it happen and... sigh. yes. this one is just so soft, i love it.

The Nearness of You by @rockstarlouis - established relationship SUUUUPER PREGNANT nesting!!! there are a few fics on this list that immediately came to mind when you asked about my favs, and this is one of those. i rarely like to read established relationship fics for whatever reason, but this fic??? SO SOFT. SO LOVELY. AND THE DYNAMIC IS SO PERFECT. i just love how careful louis is with the nest. it is so wonderful. i adore.

Tastes like Strawberries by @sadaveniren - THE STRESSED NESTING! that turns into SO much more than harry expected and it’s just WONDERFUL. i love this fic so much, from the start of it to the way things go a bit differently from how they maybe traditionally do in omegaverse. it’s a really fun fic with some a+ nesting smut. hahaha

Safety Nest by @lululawrence - I KNOW i’m sorry i’m including myself haha but this was my first attempt at nesting, and i still love it very much a lot. my drabbles don’t get much attention or love (outside of emmu, because this one was written for her haha), so i just wanted to put it out there as a fic with some nesting. hehe so thank you for indulging me here

Ziam

If you let me be your man by @lightwoodsmagic​ - ooooomg this fic has me giggling just remembering how great it is. it’s got an aspect of embarrassment, because zayn is just SO out of it already and he doesn’t even realize it, and liam is so soft and lovely and more than willing to help him safely get home, but the misunderstanding! and zayn just wants liam in his nest so badly. it is SO VERY SWEET! but also silly and gahhhhh i might have to reread this one tonight, actually haha

Narry

a little tenderness by @disgruntledkittenface - listen, the impossible has been done. i now love narry, and it’s because of this fic. all i’m gonna say is ace alpha harry needs to help recently broken up omega niall through depri, and OHHHHH it’s soooo soft and perfect and i just screamed at her most of the time i was reading. It really is just absolute perfection and niall’s nest is just *chef’s kiss*

these are not in any way the only nesting fics out there, nor the only great ones. i did my best to only list favorites. i would also like to point you to a nesting rec that @londonfoginacup made, because she is my cohort in the quest for more nesting fics in this fandom. lollll you can find her wonderful rec here. and don’t forget to leave the authors kudos and nice comments to show appreciation for their hard work!

[junghelioseok]

guarded.

◇ jungkook x reader ◇ smut | bodyguard!au ◇ 1.6k [1/1]

notes: this is actually a repost of an old drabble from my two year anniversary, which was inadvertently deleted. so if it looks familiar, that’s why! i figured i’d give it a (super unoriginal) title and a quick reread before i reposted it, and this is the end result. to the anon who originally requested it, if you’re reading this, thank you and ily! 💕

the prompts i worked off of are below:

❛❛ good girl. ❜❜

❛❛ don’t get shy on me now. ❜❜

the vibe is this jk right here.

“If that will be all, Miss, I’ll leave you to get settled in.”

You remain silent. Reaching down, you unzip your suitcase before glancing over your shoulder at your loyal bodyguard, hovering near the door of your hotel room like an overgrown bat in his long black jacket and heavy black boots. Innocently, you smile at him as you begin to pull out your belongings, laying a few items onto the perfectly made bed.

“Can you help me unpack?”

His expression doesn’t change. But you’ve always prided yourself on your astuteness, and you certainly don’t miss the way his throat bobs as he swallows. Wordlessly, he steps across the room until he’s standing at your side, accepting the stack of folded skirts and pantsuits you hand over.

“Hang these up, will you, Jungkook?” you ask, keeping your voice syrupy sweet and as innocent as can be. “I don’t want them to wrinkle.”

Jungkook nods curtly and sweeps off. You watch as he slides open the closet door and lays the pile of clothes on the nearest chair, carefully hanging up each garment one by one. There’s the blue pantsuit for tomorrow’s meeting with the board of directors, there’s the champagne-colored gown for the investor’s gala afterward, and—

—aha.

You can see the way Jungkook stiffens even from across the room, his broad shoulders tensing. You’re pretty sure he’s not even breathing anymore, his tall frame frozen in place as he stares at the item in his hand.

And the item in question? A very tiny, very skimpy, black lace negligee.

Checkmate, you think to yourself when he finally turns around. It feels as though you’ve been playing this game for ages—though in reality, Jungkook was only assigned as your personal bodyguard a few short months ago. Ever since your father decided that you would inherit his company and take over as chief executive officer, your safety had become paramount. You needed the best protection that money could buy, and that meant Jeon Jungkook.

You’d expected someone older, to be honest. Someone grizzled, with gray hair and hardened eyes the color of flint, maybe. Never in a million years did you expect to get a bodyguard like Jungkook.

Jungkook, with his parted black hair and strong eyebrows that made you weak in the knees. Jungkook, with his oversized dark clothes and combat boots. Jungkook, with his muscular frame that’s so at odds with his boyish face.

Jungkook, whom you’ve been teasing for the last three months—with tight clothes and revealing hemlines, and stepping out of the shower clad in only a towel whenever he’s in the vicinity. Ever since you caught him staring at your cleavage—showcased very nicely by the dress you’d been wearing, you might add—it’s become a game for the two of you. Flirtatious glances and the occasional brush of his hand against your back became commonplace. Once, you’d spotted him doing laps in the pool and nearly drooled at the revelation of his fully tattooed arms, the ink swirling across his honeyed skin. When he’d caught you staring, he’d winked.

But nothing has ever happened beyond that—nothing has ever crossed a line. Jungkook is nothing but professional when on the job, and you do feel safer when he’s around. He’s been a silent shadow at all of the events you’ve accompanied your father to, and now that you are on the verge of taking over the company completely, he’s at your side almost every hour of every day. He’s brought you coffee when you’re working late in your office, and made sure you’ve eaten at least one meal when the stress becomes too much. He’s become a constant, reassuring presence in your hectic life.

And now he’s striding toward you, brown eyes alight with a fire you’ve never seen before.

“You did this on purpose,” he accuses, holding up the negligee.

You tilt your head innocently. “Did I?”

Jungkook growls—a low, dangerous rumble in his throat that has you gushing. “You sure you want to test me like this, princess?”

The pet name sends an electric tingle up your spine. Boldly, you step forward until you’re standing toe-to-toe, the pointed tips of your heels brushing his boots. “Have you ever known me to be uncertain about anything in my life, Jungkook?”

He hasn’t. You know he hasn’t, because in the next instant, he’s kissing you—hands curling around your hips to pull you flush against his firm chest. Your arms wind around his neck, fingers tangling into the silky hair at his nape, and when you sigh, he eagerly swallows the sound. Wandering fingers hike up your dress and delve beneath to trace your bare skin, the touch gentle enough to make you shiver in his embrace.

Jungkook pulls back, and you pout at the sudden loss of contact. “Jungk—” you begin, but he cuts you off with a kiss, lips curled up into a smirk.

“You want me to be able to take my shirt off, don’t you?”

Stunned into silence, you can only nod. Jungkook sheds his black overcoat and flings it off to the side, leaving him in a charcoal gray turtleneck that’s tucked into black slacks and a silver-buckled belt. Deft, ring-clad fingers find the hem, and you swallow when you imagine what those fingers could be doing to you in just a few moments.

That train of thought is completely derailed, however, when Jungkook pulls off his shirt entirely, baring honeyed skin and swirling black ink to your ravenous gaze. Your fingers graze along one of the tattoos around his left wrist—a trailing vine decorated with thorny roses—and you shiver again when he chuckles and twines your wandering fingers with his.

“I’ll tell you the story behind it later,” he promises. “I’ll tell you all the stories, if you want. But right now, I want to do this.”

And before you can get another word in edgewise—before you can even breathe—he’s pressing you down onto the bed, the mattress dipping underneath your combined weight. His mouth finds yours again, hot and insistent, before trailing down to the junction where your neck meets your shoulder and latching on there. His teeth sink into the delicate skin, blossoming pain and purple bruises along your flesh, but it’s the delicious sort that leaves you gasping and desperate for more. You’re clutching at his shoulders by this point, nails digging harsh crescents into his skin, but he doesn’t seem to mind one bit as he kisses his way down to the collar of your dress and tears it off with a growl.

Cool air washes across your skin, and you belatedly remember that you’d decided to forego a bra this morning. Jungkook is staring down at your exposed body, transfixed, and you flush under the sudden scrutiny.

“Don’t get shy on me now,” he murmurs when you move to cross your arms over your chest. “You’re perfect. Pretty, perfect, and all fucking mine.”

Then he’s tugging your arms aside and leaning down to envelop a nipple in his mouth, teasing the hardening peak with his tongue. The sensation has you moaning, and you feel him smile against your skin before he switches his attention to its neglected twin. “So pretty,” he murmurs, pulling back so he can blow a cool puff of air against your dampened skin and chuckling when you shudder. “I bet you’ll look even prettier without this on.”

He snaps the band of your panties against your skin, and you whine out his name. “Hurry up and take them off, then.”

Jungkook grins. “So impatient,” he murmurs, but the growing tent in his pants betrays his own eagerness. In one motion, he’s peeling your panties down your legs, tossing them aside. Reaching down, he unbuckles his belt and frees his cock, gaze never leaving yours as he nudges your thighs apart and settles between them.

“Jungkook,” you murmur, breathy and soft. “Fuck me, please.”

He doesn’t need any more convincing. Jungkook leans forward, his lithe body poised over yours as he slowly guides his cock inside you. His tongue darts out to moisten his lips as he slides home, and you groan at the feeling of him fully seated inside your body, hot and slick and so, so full.

“Look at you,” he rasps, drawing back so he can thrust forward once more. “Such a good girl, taking my cock like this.”

You whimper at the surge of fullness, wrapping your legs around his waist to draw him closer. Jungkook’s fingers curl around your hips, and you keen out his name when he starts up a rough pace that nearly rips the air from your lungs. A stream of praise falls from his lips—how good you feel wrapped around him, how long he’s been dreaming of this moment—and you return his hushed sentiments with airy whispers and pleas for more, more, more.

When you come, it’s with his name on your lips. Jungkook reaches his high just moments later, and you wind your arms around his neck lazily as he catches his breath again, brushing a few strands of black hair off his forehead.

“Fuck,” he sighs, letting his head fall onto your bare shoulder. “I shouldn’t have done this.”

You run your fingers through his hair, letting your nails scrape gently against his scalp. “Done what? Given me the best fuck of my life?”

He snorts out a disbelieving laugh. “I don’t think that’s part of my job description.”

“Fuck the job description,” you reply, poking his cheek until he looks up, and kissing him once he does. “You’re my bodyguard, right? So come over here, and guard me.”

[gemmassong]

So uh. It’s 4:17am and I know literally no one cares but I just finished watching Bo Burnham’s new special and like, holy shit. I have some Feelings. And this is my fucking tumblr so unfortunately anyone who follows me can and will be subjected to those Feelings. Apologies in advance. I blame my high school English teacher for this, who I had for freshmen, junior, and senior year, because that cunt made as analyze and pick apart not just books but documentaries, movies, and other pieces of media to such an extreme degree I still blame her for a lot of my academic burnout and inability to really engage with my college courses because what was the fucking point. If I could write the best paper in the class and still not get a full score when my classmates with less well written shit did because I ‘wasn’t reaching my full potential or putting in as much effort as required’ why should I bother. 

Off topic. I’ll put the rest under a cut to be vaguely courteous because this is going to be a lot of semi-organized rambling that I’m putting here mostly so I can stare at it in baffled, disgusted horror at ~2pm tomorrow when I go back and reread it. And then decide not to delete it anyway because hey, I don’t delete anything because I enjoy tormenting myself years down the road.

I grew up with Bo Burnham, yeah? I knew all the lyrics to New Math when I was in middle school and you can bet your ass I understood like, four verses at the time I first started singing it. And I remember the vivid pleasure of going through high school and hating math because I suck at it (ayooo failed out of Calc senior year first semester~ (they weren’t called semesters in hs they were some quarterly thing but I don’t fucking remember the right term)) and the absolute joy realizing how one of those verses were clever was brought me. Like, every time I understood a new verse in New Math it made my entire day so much better. 

And then the summer after my first year of college I, for some fucking reason I cannot fathom now, 20 year old me thought it was a brilliant idea to decide to watch What. with my parents while we ate dinner. I had seen What. before. I knew what the contents entailed. I was apparently 100% down to watch him pretend to jack off on stage while eating taco salad in the living room with both of my parents who were so closed mouthed about sex that I got literally my entire sexual education from fanfiction. 

And then my cat had a seizure literally right before that scene so fate helped me escape that hell for some reason, and yes, Siren was fine after a very scary night.

But like. Still. What the fuck, 20 year old me. Why did you set yourself up for the mortifying experience of watching a comedian mime jacking off while sitting next to your mother. Why. 

So anyway. Bo Burnham was peripherally a part of my life for a very long time. I’ve always really liked him. I wish he had made more vines while vine was still a thing because the ‘is there anything better than pussy’ one still cracks me tf up. 

I saw a post here at some point about how the new special made someone feel like they’d just watched his suicide note. And I didn’t take it seriously, because yeah, Make Happy got kinda serious and stressful there at the end but like? 

Maaaaan am I glad I watched Inside though, despite being vaguely concerned. I totally get where that person was coming from. It does kinda feel like that. At the same time though, I just have this feeling that Inside is going to be important. 

Here’s where I finally get to the actual fucking point of the post.

Collectively, entertainment media is desperately trying right now to figure out how the hell to handle the pandemic. Ignore it? Pretend all media now exists in a universe where the shitstorm of 2020 didn’t exist? Most of the ones that I’ve seen have gone down what I consider the absolute worst route, which is of course terrible fucking writing that kind of? addresses the pandemic and shit that went down, but like, with clunky dialogue and really bad jokes. I’m mostly talking about the Roseanne spinoff/sequel/whatever the fuck it’s considered, of which I watched half an episode of and then silently begged my fiance to let us leave his mother’s house because she was laughing at it and it was genuinely, horrifically painful. This is why I don’t watch tv anymore. 

ANYWAY. He never mentions it. Not once. There are plenty of really relevant things discussed and pointed out and I think one? mention of the actual year 2020 but beyond that. Nothing. And I feel like Inside might be one of the most genuine, visceral, real pieces of media portraying the pandemic that we, as an American society anyway, are going to come away from this all with. At least everyone in my own admittedly piss poor social circles has spent like last ~year and a half doing that social media thing where the more you post about how well you’re doing and great it all is, the more miserable and bad off you really are.

(Yes, that is how I judge my ‘friends’’ relationships on facebook. The more pictures/posts/tagged shit/social media demonstrations of how ~amazing~ and ~in love~ and ~perfect~ everything is, the worse I assume the reality is.)

But Inside strikes as very, very real. And I just feel like 20 30 40 50 years from now, when we’re talking about the 2020 pandemic and how it shaped and shifted and effected and destroyed people and society, it’s going to be a very important piece of media. Because so far, anyway, it’s the first one I’ve seen where you can actually see it all go down. The absolute fucking breakdown so many of us went through. Dealing with worsening mental problems that had previously been getting better, lost progress, ruined plans and dreams and missed opportunities and everything else. 

It’s the first one that strikes as real, I guess. As not manufactured. Not tailored to portray the ‘correct’ message. Not diminishing or exaggerating anything but just... showing. Existing within the reality of the year. And not being apologetic or ashamed about it. 

I’m glad he actually went through with putting it out into the world. That probably took a whole lot to do, and I hope good things get to him for going through with it all. For completing it and giving it to the world. It was visceral and raw to watch and my piss poor attention span that needs 20+ tabs open at all times actually sat there and watched it, in full, all the way through in one go. Without pausing to read a fic, watch something else, check facebook or tumblr, answer a roleplay, or skim through omegle to see if anyone good was online. That’s like, unheard of these days.

I just. I dunno. There’s a lot there to breakdown. A part of me wants to do it, take the time and write the analysis and the breakdowns and pick out what I think the important bits are. But I hate doing that now and I’m sure the desire will be gone come afternoon-morning, along with all these weird feelings about it. 

This has gotten long enough and it’s 4:47 now, so half an hour of word vomiting into a tumblr post is probably too much. So I guess I’ll call it quits and maybe maybe not delete this when I wake up. Night, anyone who actually suffered through reading this mess.

[hitsuackerman]

Unpredictable (Overhaul x Reader) pt.19

a/n: so... uhh... nothing much happens here but the last part is worth it :’) i guess? hope ya’ll like this nonetheless! 

warnings: this cannot be read solo

Links: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, part 9, part 10, part 11, part 12, part 13, part 14, part 15, part 16, part 17, part 18, part 20

Masterlist to my other fics: here :)

Overhaul’s waiting list: @jjk-biased @infinite-universe-love @dirtypride @blackymomo03 @azzie @purple-rabanito​ @meximorrita @awesomeee19​​ @celestial-kanzakii​ @laure-lo​ @team-wang-puppy​ @aydience-world​ @choros-main-hoe​ @colorseeingchick​  @but-kairis-not-that-smart (i cant seem to tag again :( hope this lands in your timelines!)

Two days since that fated encounter with Chronostasis, you were now left with a vacant rest day. And where better place to spend it than with Dr. Hanayaka. Setting an appointment with him, as he liked to call it, you were tasked to help with the blood pressure for each patient he had. Luckily, his schedule wasn’t that straining.

“So you mean to say, his henchman met with you in secret?” Gei asked and raised an eyebrow. With his stethoscope resting on his shoulder and white coat on, it was sometimes hard to believe that this flamboyant man was a well respected doctor. “And handed you trash man’s sim card?”

“Yeah. I’ve already checked the contents of the sim and there’s not a lot to go on.” Aside from your messages, the contents of his inbox were that of an average man’s. Expecting some tea about his trade or even important numbers of other villains, you had to think whether or not Chrono deleted some or not.

“And what about that plan of yours, hmm?” Gei fixed his eyelashes before staring back at you. “What if it backfires and Chrono takes the blame?”

“He won’t. My instructions were clear and I set a time frame as well. Just something to please the heroes for setting me up.”

“You movin over to the dark side, baby girl?”

“Just balancing things out.” You shrugged. “Levi made it clear that they shouldn’t interfere with my relationship with Overhaul. Even though I’m on justice’s side, I still want to tip the scales a bit due to personal reasons.”

“Wouldn’t your badge and title be removed if they found out? And why in Todrick’s name are you so chill with this topic?! Are you certain you don’t have a bug on you?” Your friend eyed you down so quickly. Worried that policemen might end up barging inside his office.

“Don’t worry. I’m wearing new clothes so there’s no way they can. Besides, I’m being as cautious as ever. Seriousness aside, I do have some information you might want to feast on.” You smirked at the mental image of a maskless Chrono.

“Spill…” Gei shifted in his seat and leaned in closer. The look on your face only meant one thing.

“Okay, so Overhaul’s right hand man was the one who met me right? Well~ He took off his mask and I will have to admit the man looked hella fine~”

“Describe! Describe!”

“For starters, he has bluish-gray eyes. Though he looks like he wants to kill a person right there and then, he probably could since his jaw was rather prominent. His voice without the mask is different too.” You watched as Gei listened with such focus. “But, if I were to be honest, describing him doesn’t do him good. He looks really handsome.”

“Why is it always the villains who look good?” Gei commented with a pout. “Hawks aside, because that man is something else, but they just hit different you know?”

“That’s true. Shame they have to wear those masks, though.”

“On the contrary, I think it’s good that they do. Otherwise they’d have to endure the wrath of fan girls.”

“Right. Also feels good when they trust you enough to show what’s behind the mask.” Nodding at your own statement, the memory of having lunch with Overhaul came back. With no given warning, he took off his mask and casually drank water. Realizing that he had done it on purpose, a tiny smile formed on your mouth.

“If you miss him that bad, just call him.”

“He changed numbers and I’m not that desperate to ask Chrono for it. Nao said in due time he’ll contact me but the chances of that are negative.”

“Honey, it’s the modern era. Women aren’t as shy as they were before. If you want something, go and get it. If it is a guy’s new number, then go ahead. It’s not just men who make the first move. And besides, I think Overhoe would be surprised if you just suddenly ring his doorbell.”

“You do realize, I do not have the same confidence as you.”

“Fake it till you make it, boo.” He snapped his fingers in a z-formation.

“You’ve been watching Soopernatural again, haven’t you?”

“Okay, first off, Jenred Padackles is a god and I would worship his feet. Second, that show has references to everything and you can’t deny that.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” Standing up from the sofa, you stretched your limbs. “Anyway, I gotta scram.”

“Where you headin’ off to missy?”

“I have to meet up with Nao regarding the Fukuo Kai case.”

“But it’s your day off. Get a life and do something else other than work, (n/n).” Gei threw a pen to your direction but you dodged it effortlessly. “Don’t make me tell your father.”

“It’s only for a few minutes. It’s in preparation for tomorrow.” Not bothering to wait, you exited the room and sofly closed the doors to his office. Time spent with Gei was always an eye opener. However, it still wasn’t enough for you to stoop so low and ring his doorbell.

Making your way out of the hospital, you took a quick stop to the vending machines and chose a cold cafe au lait. Perfect for the hot and humid weather Japan had to offer. Feeling the cold liquid running down your throat was amazing and within seconds, you downed the whole drink. Tossing the empty bottle to the recycle bin, a gust of wind caused you to lose balance.

“Oh no.”

“Oh yes.”

“I have a meeting to attend to Hawks.” Hawks took his visors off and ruffled his wings. Offering to buy him a drink, he chose a tetra pack of  apple juice. Walking to the vacant bench, you followed him and decided that perhaps his visit would be worth it. “So what did the bird hear today?”

“Twice and Toga Himiko.”

“League of-” Then it hit you. “I see. Since when?”

“Yesterday. One of my informants saw them entering the base and left late at night. They didn’t look too happy about it, though.” Lowering his headphones, he ruffled his hair and stared at the clear blue skies. “Do what you will with this information. Just thought I’d let you know.”

“How and why do you even bother?”

“I work for the HPSC dove. If I don’t want them getting in my head, I gotta kick their crotches first.”

“That’s not the best analogy.”

“Still works though.” He winked and put on his headphones and visors back. Standing up, he offered a hand and you accepted it. Tailing you, Hawks was now opening the door for your car. “And one more thing, another of my birdies caught the scent of the quirk erasing bullets nearing its completion stages. Probably 80% now.”

“That’s fast.” You had to admit.

“Heard he’s been pissed. Be careful baby bird.” Hawks closed your door and saluted before flying off.

80%? That was enough information to speed up the Shie Hassaikai raid. Reaching out for your bag, you took the burner phone you recently purchased and reread each message the both of you exchanged. With two League of Villains now part of the yakuza, the possibility of casualties was much higher now.

Within minutes, you were now on the road. Fingers tightly wrapping the steering wheel. Your thumb bouncing with growing guilt at choosing to hide what Hawks had just said. Of course this wasn’t to ensure his victory, it was to even the field, right? It was the pettiness taking over you and Nighteye going against his words. It had to be.

Turning towards the precinct, you saw your designated parking area. The basement parking was a bit crowded today.

Heading towards the meeting room Tsukauchi had prepared for the small info sharing, you greeted fellow coworkers and kept conversation till you disappeared around the corner. Not too long after, you were now fiddling with your fingers. Basking in the silence till the doors opened revealing your partner and Shinezu. Both men took their seats and commenced the meeting.

“So, Shinezu will be tagging along.” He nodded at your coworker who seemed to be trembling at the thought. “It’ll do you good, Shinez. Trust me.”

“I-I know, Tsukau-kun.” He adjusted his tie, loosening it a bit. “I just think I’m not cut out for this mission you know? I do better behind the scenes.”

“While I believe that’s true, the 4th division works best when you’re around.”

“That’s true.” You agreed. Shinezu may not be the most social cookie out there but his brain was close to Namase. He also had the knack of coming up with solutions when things went wrong. All he needed was to amp his social skills. “We all know the 4th division leader is weak for you.”

“Not t-true.”

“All too true. You’ll be fine, Shinez. Have I ever lied to you?”

When the raven-haired man finally nodded his head, Tsukauchi cleared his throat and relayed the plans for tomorrow. It was the standard undercover data gathering in your books.

“So, to recap, the 4th division will be handling the snooping and we’ll remain on guard should all else fail?” You repeated the information given. Tsukauchi scratched his chin and nodded. Confirming that you had fully understood his message. “All this should happen within 5 hours. Got it. That’s quite cramped but manageable.”

“5 hours was the only allotted time I could fit in.” He scratched his nape and looked away. “You were right when I had to take it slow with my cases.”

“I’m not one to comment~” Waving the conversation aside, you stood up and the others followed.

With the short meeting now over, Tsukauchi and you were now seated in the break room. Cups of coffee present as you exchanged more information about your days and current mission. For a brief moment, despite him not being a part of the Shie Hassaikai Raid, you wanted to pour every single information you had just gained from Hawks. The lingering guilt was much more present now.

“You’re spacing out.” He snapped his fingers in front of you. “You alright?”

“Aside from the growing problem of trashman, I’m fine. Just a lot on my mind.” Taking a sip from your coffee, the usual taste of bitterness was strong today. “Nothing to worry about~”

“You should go home, (n/n). I already took up a portion of your time. Any more and I might drown from embarrassment.”

“That’s gross. Even coming from you.” Kicking him from under the table, the two of you laughed before chugging the remaining drops of coffee. “I will take that offer though. Need me some beauty sleep before shit happens again. See ya!”

Hours had passed and you were now stuffing your face with chips. He was right when he said you had purchased too much but you weren’t complaining. The movie playing now was one of your favorites, Prisoner. Gake Jyllenhall was divine in this movie. It was always the twist of the movie that kept you watching it over and over again.

“I wonder if we had watched this… would the wall pinning  happen?” You thought out loud. Shaking your thoughts away from him, you stopped the movie and stored the chips.

Now that you were settled in bed, Overhaul’s jacket rested on top of you. By now, his scent had disappeared and was now replaced by yours. Grabbing your phone, you opened the messaging app and clicked on a certain conversation. Rereading his messages was not the best idea but at least you would be able to relive whatever memories you had created.

Glancing at your desk calendar, in just two months time, you would meet him again. Would things still be the same? Or would things go back to the way they were? Tucking your phone under the unused pillow, you willed yourself to sleep and surprisingly succeeded.

Waking up not so refreshed happened again. But, nothing out of the ordinary. Not being a morning person, you dragged your body away from the bed and began the necessary clothes. Deciding to just buy breakfast, it took you less than an hour to lock your doors and head over to the parking lot.

Making your way up the steps, you met up with Shinezu.

“You look like shit, Shinez.” You teased him. “Take a chill pill.”

“I already did. But it’s still not working. This would be the first case in a while where I’ll interact with others.” Leading the way, the both of you were now walking through the empty hallways. The sounds of your footsteps muffled by the cheap carpeted floors. “How do you guys even manage to survive situations like these?”

“By taking it one step at a time~” Not the best advice for someone who’s socially challenged but it is what it is.

Opening the doors for you, the both of you entered the room and took your designated seats. A bunch of people from the 4th division were now present. Tsukauchi had not yet arrived but it was still early so it was excusable. Exchanging a few small talk, you caught up with what the 4th division was up to till the doors finally opened.

“Good morning everyone.” Tsukauchi greeted. Feet glued to his spot. His eyesight focused on you. “Before we head out, we have a special guest joining us.”

“Holy shit.” Shinezu uttered under his breath.

- - - - -

a/n: shits bout to go down again! I would like to take this time to thank each one of you who take the time to read this! Unpredictable was supposedly a 10 chapter story but we bout to reach 20 now! i cant really respond to your comments as much but i read all of ‘em and they always make my day :’) my schedule has just been very hectic these days huhu and yeas that ends my rant~ see ya’ll next week! :* and yes, the waiting list is still open :)

[gracereadstoomanybooks]

answering questions I’ve been asked on TikTok✨

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QUESTION: how did you get into reading?

So, when I was in middle school (many moons ago) we had this thing called AR Testing. Basically, you read a book and take a test on it—the questions were things that happened in the book, it was really simple. If you got a good grade, you got points. The more points you earned, the more eligible you were for the reading party at the end of each semester. Me, being the nerd I am, got top of my class because I went through 8th grade level books like it was nothing. The librarian at my school brought me books from the high school to read since everything was easy for me, and alas, my addiction began. And now that I have adult money, it’s a true addiction. Also, telling my father “I’m bored” and his response being, “go read a book or something” so thanks dad.

QUESTION: what’s one book you ALWAYS recommend to people?

This one is tough because I’ve read THOUSANDS of books, but if I had to choose one, it would probably be Confess by Colleen Hoover. I fell in love with her work in high school when I first read Ugly Love, but Confess is the type of book that pulls at your heart strings, y’all. It has everything people love: humor, sexual tension, drama, love. GO BUY THE DAMN BOOK. Or honestly any book by Colleen Hoover—she’s a fucking amazing author.

QUESTION: outside of making TikToks, what do you do for a living?

I currently work at a restaurant and hate every second of it. If anyone tells you to become a server, DONT. It’s not worth the hassle, I promise you. Sure, you can make decent money but the amount of rude customers and shitty tips you receive each shift is very disheartening. If you really need a job, do anything BUT work in the food industry.

QUESTION: what’s your wattpad story about?

First question: which one? I have about 30 drafts sitting there waiting to be posted. But, I’m going to assume you’re talking about the Harry Styles fan fiction I’ve been working on for the past 4 years and haven’t had the courage to post. I’ll tell you a little about it: Elaine Aldridge is forced into a betrothal to a man she’s never met & loathes. She goes to his court and realizes things aren’t what they truly seem. And the guard her future husband sticks on her??? None other than Mr. Harry Styles. Add in some magic & deaths and you’ve got my story— The First Prince. (Honestly, that’s an extremely shitty description so if you wanna check it out go to my wattpad account)

QUESTION: how old are you?

Ahem. . . twenty-one.

QUESTION: what is your dream career?

Being a published author and having people rave about my books. That’s all. Or, an editor for a publishing company. Imagine reading all day and being paid for it🤩

QUESTION: what was your least favorite read of 2020?

I already KNOW I’m gonna get shit for this but....... the wicked king. YALL I LITERALLY COULDNT GET THROUGH IT IM SO SORRY, I STILL HAVENT FINISHED IT

QUESTION: current favorite author?

Sarah. J. Maas. I don’t know what it is about her writing style, but it’s addicting. Throne of Glass is hands down the best series I’ve ever read. A Court of Thorns and Roses is the first book I’ve EVER reread. Her stories truly suck you in and hold onto you—you get lost so easily in her writing and it’s like once you’re done with a series, nothing will compare. Or, at least that’s how I felt after finishing Kingdom of Ash. Honorable mentions: Jennifer L. Armentrout, Penelope Douglas, L.J Shen, Elle Kennedy and Kennedy Fox.

QUESTION: any recommendations/tips to give to a new reader?

I’ve always given this advice to people who want to get into reading: find what you like and start with that. If you like romance, I’ve got a list for you to choose from. Mystery? Another list. Sci-fi? I GOT YOU. Fantasy? Yes! Sports fiction? It might take me a second but I’ll find you a book. Nonfiction? I’m zero help in that category, honestly. The point of the matter is that you’re never going to enjoy a book if you aren’t interested in the underlying topics.

QUESTION: do you ever find yourself comparing your life to fictional life?

Yes. All the time. I daydream about being apart of the Inner Circle and living in Terrasen with Aelin and Rowan. I think about what it would be like to have real powers and a mate. It drives my boyfriend crazy—but he loves me anyway.

QUESTION: what are your most anticipated books of 2021?

Here’s a list:

A Court of Silver Flames by Sarah J. Maas

The Crown of Gilded Bones by Jennifer L. Armentrout

Gods and Monsters by Shelby Mahurin

Crescent City 2 (Untitled) by Sarah J. Maas

A Vow So Bold and Deadly by Brigid Kemmerer (I just ordered this one & it arrives tomorrow)

Blessed Monsters by Emily A. Duncan

QUESTION: why did you start a Tumblr?

Honestly, I used to love tumblr when I was in grade school (way too young to be on here then but what else is new). I like having an extra space to get my questions and comments out without having to compress it into a 60 second video for TikTok to see. Tumblr is a good place to blog & post things like this.

QUESTION: what’s your favorite song right now?

I’ve listened to Carry You by Novo Amor every day for the past two months and I cry each time.

QUESTION: why write Harry Styles fan fiction?

Simple: I love Harry Styles. I’ve been a fan of him and One Direction since they were on X FACTOR. Read that again. X. Factor. I used to watch their performances on YouTube before WMYB even came out. Of course, I love all of the 1D boys but I was always a Harry gal. And I look up to him in a way—I’ve read things about people wishing they knew him personally and honestly? I would never want to meet him. I like the version of him I’ve cooked up in my brain over the past 10 years. I like the symbiotic relationship I have with his music. Fine Line is a ✨masterpiece✨. HS1 is a ✨work of art✨.

now, some topics I’ve been asked way too many times and want to finally get to:

QUESTION: political views?

the saying “anyone but trump” has been in my brain for the past four years. No, I’m not a republican. No, I’m not a democrat. I like to think of myself as a progressive (ahem, liberal) Did I vote for a democratic candidate? Yes, and I’d do it again and again until the US isn’t one of the worst countries—I’m sorry, businesses— to be apart of. I wanted Bernie but got Biden, and I’m alright with that. And my girl Kamala🥳

QUESTION: how did you feel about the BLM protests?

I went to multiple BLM protests and donated a lot of funds to BLM & other organizations. It’s 2021, people... stop being fucking RACIST. And don’t be afraid to call racist people out! Black Lives Matter, even if no one is posting about it anymore.

QUESTION: thoughts on abortion?

your body your choice, queen! not my uterus, not my problem.

QUESTION: there was a comment on an old video of yours talking about r*pe, why did you delete the comment?

I made a video when I first started my account on TikTok about reading in public and feeling “turned on” by it. Go watch it if you don’t know what I’m talking about. BUT, some ignorant male decided to comment and say “this is how girls get r*ped”. Whew. So. I deleted the comment because ....

I am a victim of sexual assault. Along with a lot of other women. 1 in 5 women have been victims of sexual assault. Talking about being r*ped isn’t funny.

No one else needed to see his comment. I reported it immediately and his account was shut down.

I never got justice for what happened to me, and the fact that some random male—who had never even met me or seen me before my video showed up on his FYP—had the nerve to comment that? Unacceptable.

this question isn’t as controversial but

QUESTION: what’s the best way to get out of a toxic relationship?

okay, let me just start off by saying that the people around you who love and support you are going to be your backbone. Leaving a toxic situation is hard, and every situation is different, but my best piece of advice to offer you is don’t be afraid to ask for help. Your loved ones are going to be there for you when you need them, even if you don’t believe they will. If you explain what’s happening, someone you know and love will drop whatever it is their doing to make sure you get out safely. good luck my babes.

now, back to our regularly scheduled program:

QUESTION: any tips on making tiktoks?

Literally none. I post what I think is funny and relatable and if anyone agrees, I’m satisfied. Even if it’s one view, it’s good enough for me. So I guess my one tip is to not base your life off of an app and followers.

QUESTION: favorite Harry Styles fanfic?

DONT MAKE ME CHOOSE. Duplicity is up there, along with Stall 1&2, and Kiwi. After? Absolutely not.

QUESTION: favorite WEBTOON?

y’all already KNOW. LORE OLYMPUS BY USEDBANDAID. Rachel is a genius and I have reread the series a million times. Hades is my soulmate and Apollo can rot in the fiery pits of the Underworld. also, if we’re talking about other webcomics, reading Walk on Water on mangadex...🤫

QUESTION: favorite movie?

Howls Moving Castle. I will be getting my “a heart is a heavy burden” tattoo very very soon.

QUESTION: I read your Elain theory on tumblr, can you explain a little more?

I thought I was pretty straightforward but I’ll say it again: she is always the “good” one and it’s too suspicious. SJM has already given one Archeron sister a happy ending, Nesta’s is obviously inevitable, but Elain? She has too many options for a happy ending. Lucien, who is her “mate”. Azriel, who is intrigued by her slightly. Her human guy—I don’t remember his name—who is disgusted that she’s not human anymore. Or, alone, planting flowers all day. BUT! My point is that she’s not truly happy. She was forced into the Cauldron just like Nesta. She was ripped away from the life she loved so dearly and didn’t want to give up. The man she was going to marry now hates her guts because she’s a High Fae. She has the perfect set up for a villain plot line and I’m all here for it.

well, that’s all I feel like doing tonight. hope you enjoyed my little q&a! be kind, and talk to you later! byeeee!

[kpoppwriter]

We Got Married! First Date - Yeo One

Genre: fluff AU

Words: 1.3k+

Tag List: @chanyeolol , @mashtons-unicorn

a/n: I am so soft for this man but also so hard lol he’s such a cutie pie loOK AT THAT SMILE UGH LITERAL SUNSHINE also I might be adding another group to my list of people I write for. I’ve begun stanning a new group lol

We Got Married Masterlist~

As the fountain got into your field of vision, you stopped. You started getting cold feet, too nervous to keep going. You heard your phone chime.

? - I’m waiting for you, wife~

You kind of let out a squeak, the text catching you off guard. You siked yourself up enough to walk over to the fountain. You didn’t see anyone when you got there. You walked around, seeing if there was someone sitting on the other side. You spotted someone dressed in a suit on the other side sitting with a bouquet of flowers. You gasped quietly as they got up, recognizing them right away.

“Oh! Hello,” you said shyly

“Hi there.”

You were taken aback by the man in front of you. His smile was radiant and it took your breath away. You stared at him for what you hoped wasn’t too long. You didn’t want to come off as creepy. 

“I’m Yeo One from Pentagon,” he chuckled to himself shyly, “But you can call me Changgu.”

“I’m Y/G’s Y/N,” you smiled

“It’s nice to meet you, Y/N.”

And there your heart goes again. His smile was like sunshine and it made you feel warm. You opened your mouth to speak but closed it right away. You don’t know what would’ve come out of your mouth if you spoke. You could notice a rosy tint on his cheeks as he cleared his throat, pulling you out of your daze. 

“I got you these,” he extended the bouquet of flowers in his hand towards you, “I don’t know if you like flowers or not but I saw them on my way here and thought you might like them.”

“They’re beautiful. Thank you,” you admired the flowers, taking them from him. 

Your fingers brush up against his as you take the bouquet from him. It was a simple touch but it made the butterflies in your stomach flutter more. You noticed his eyes get wide for a second before regaining his composure. He must’ve felt the same way you did about the innocent touch. 

“I thought we could do something fun for our first time out together. How does mini golf sound?”

“Sounds great to me,” you smiled

“Great!” he gestured towards the exit of the park, “After you.” 

~

It didn’t take you too long to get to the mini golf place. You and Changgu took different cars, arriving just a few minutes apart. Your eyes scanned over the golf course as you waited for him. It was a cute fairy tale themed place, a large castle was down towards the end of the course. There were magical creatures and large (obviously fake) candies lining the sides of the greenery. Changgu came up beside you with a content hum.

“This looks like it’ll be fun,” you commented

“Mhmm, I think so too,” he agreed

The two of you walked into the building to get your putters and golf balls. When you came back out, each of you had your own appropriately sized putter and colorful ball. You had a hot pink one and Changgu’s was black, stating it was his favorite color when he picked it out. The two of you started your mini golf journey at the first hole. It was rather easy but as you continued playing, it got harder and harder.

There was a small breeze that hit your legs as you played. You frequently had to stop to keep the skirt of your dress down, even though there wasn’t much of a chance of anything being exposed since the dress was on the longer side. Seeing your struggle, Changgu offered you his jacket to tie around you. 

“No, it’s okay!” you assured him

“No, please take it. I’ll be fine without it.”

You couldn’t say no to him. You took it, thanking him as you did so. He smiled brightly after you tied the jacket around your waist. You looked a lot more comfortable now and that made him happy. 

You continued playing, your competitive nature starting to peek out. You watched as Changgu easily hit hole-in-one after hole-in-one. You pouted as he softly hit his ball making it roll into the hole. He gently teased you as you failed to get anywhere near the hole yet again. You huffed in frustration.

“I can help you, if you want?”

You took a second to think about his offer. You didn’t want to let your new found golfing enemy to help you but you were tired of being so shit at this game. You nodded finally, your need to get one good hole overpowering your competitiveness. He chuckled at your defeated face as he came up beside you. His eyes flicked to yours, as if he was asking permission to touch you. You nodded slightly. His arms wrapped around yours as you held the putter in your hands. His hands rested atop yours. You could feel his breath fanning the back of your neck as he spoke. You didn’t actually listen to what he was saying, the position you were in had you zoned out. You could only concentrate on the way he was touching you with such care and how his warm breath tickled the nape of your neck. You felt him move both of your arms.

“And that’s how you do it.”

You watched as your golf ball sunk into the hole with ease. You noticed how he lingered in the position for a second before pulling away, walking to the next hole. You swear you saw a blush forming on his cheeks, despite how he tried to hide it. You don’t blame him though. You wished you could hide your now cherry red cheeks too. 

~

After your very eventful game of mini golf, you and Changgu went your separate ways. You were in your company’s car on your way back to the dorms. You recounted the day in your head. 

Changgu had won the game of mini golf but you didn’t care too much. At least you tried to make it seem like you didn’t care too much. On the inside, your competitiveness was screaming at you for not being better at the dumb game. Changgu actually almost forgot to give you the ring provided by the staff of the show. He remembered right when the two of you were at the last hole in front of the giant castle. He made a big production of giving you the ring, even though the blush on both of your faces showed how embarrassing it was. 

You were pulled out of your daydreaming by your phone in your pocket buzzing. You pulled it out and opened the notification.

C - I had fun with you today :)

Y - I did too! Mini golf was fun

C - It really was

C - Even though I could tell you were bummed you didn’t win 😝

Y - Ok so maybe I’m a little bummed 

Y - But I’m going to beat you next time!

C - So there’ll be a next time?

You cursed at yourself. This boy could read you like a book and here you were being the most obvious person ever. You wished you could delete that text from your brain and his.

Y - Well, yeah. I have to beat you at mini golf now. It’s my life’s mission

C - You’re funny :)

C - I’m just about to get to my dorms. I’ll see you tomorrow

Y - Ok! Have a good rest of your day! c:

C - You as well, Y/N 

You reread your texts with Changgu over and over. Wow...he’s such a charmer. Very prince-like. The exchanging of the rings in front of the castle feels really appropriate now, almost as if it was staged. You sighed contently as you put your phone back into your pocket. You stared out the window. This was going to be an interesting few weeks. 

[cinnaminsvga]

what are your favorite fics you read for every member? like the ones that resonated and left you a changed woman when you finished. could be because of characterization, or plot, or nostalgia, just the ones that come first and easy for every member, like, the iconic ones for you. can be mxm. i'm asking cause i just read worldwide lonesome and. damb. just. i kinda feel like i read seokjin’s diary or something? like it felt invasive just bc of how REAL he felt, you feel me? so. i'm curious about u

this is such a loaded ask because honestly, i had to think really deeply about this!! there are so many fics out there that have changed me as a writer and as a person in general that its hard to pick just seven... but i’m glad you mentioned worldwide lonesome because that fic is definitely!! fucking!! up there!! it might actually be my #1 seokjin fic, so you already got me there. but man... i put a lot of thought into my answer because my reading list is a never-ending pool of queerness and angstiness, as those tend to resonate the most deeply with me (since i am, after all, both queer and angsty HAHAH) so uhhh... here i go!! (also i apologize that these are mostly mxm... weirdly enough, i’m kind of more affected by those bc i relate more to them than reader inserts for some reason... the world is bombarded with hetero representation, so excuse me for clinging to my sole source of queer love lmao)

➤ for seokjin:

worldwide lonesome by loindexter [yoonjin] - i already mentioned it, but MAN... this fic left me stunned. the characterization of seokjin is what gets me the most, and by god, i am a SUCKER for coming out stories. as a closeted queer person, i’ve always wondered what other people’s experiences are with coming to terms with their sexuality, and op really hits the nail on the head. seokjin in this fic just feels... so real. like you said, it almost felt like i was looking into his diary!! it was maddening and tearjerking and oh so fucking human... you could feel his turmoil as if it were your own... and yoongi!! dear god, yoongi... that sweet fool... this fic just struck a cord with me because of how intimate and vulnerable it felt. i really hope i can write a fic like that in the future.

➤ for yoongi:

here comes the sun by fruitily [yoonkook] - this was unequivocally the hardest decision i’ve ever had to make in my life, mostly because i’ve read a plethora of yoongi fics in my day and it is quite literally so difficult to pin down a singular fic that changed me the most as a person. the reason i chose this certain fruitily fic (op will always be my biggest writing idol... if i could, i’d list down their entire masterlist as my favorite yoongi/jungkook fics of all time) because of the emotions it made me feel. there’s always something a bit sad about summer romances, and i’ve always been a sucker for that sort of trope because of the many possibilities you can do with it. it’s just... the way yoongi was portrayed here was just so darn REAL,,, you could almost physically feel his increasing want, his slow realization that yes, he does love the bucktoothed kid from summer camp. i absolutely adore the interactions he has with all the characters, because you can almost fool yourself into thinking he’s a real person. he’s a friend, and you’re watching him come to terms with what it means to love someone you only see once a year. dear lord i love that dude i’m gonna go cry now!!

(also bc i’m cheating but i also recommend the nights really were made for saying things you can't say tomorrow day by siderum... first yoonkook fic i ever read and dare i say it literally changed me as a person. there are no words.)

➤ for hoseok:

depaysement by 1honeypot (oilblotter/obiwrites) - okay i know this is fucked up for me to recommend a fic that doesn’t even exist on the internet anymore (op deleted her account on tumblr and has moved to ao3 but she’s never gonna reupload this fic again unfortunately) but MAN i still remember that fic to this day. it was so fucking GOOD and it made me realize the potential reader fics had that i never knew was possible. the entire plot was the usual make-over cliche (popular trendy girl makes the nerd hot yadah yadah yadah) that i had thought wouldn’t be interesting, but op managed to turn that trope into her own. it was hilarious, hot, moving, relatable... just ticking off every point that makes a fic great. i miss that fic so dearly and if you were some of the lucky few who managed to read it when it was still around... i think you all understand.

➤ for namjoon:

beta tau sigma by bazooka [namjin] - i cannot count the amount of times i’ve reread this fic. like, no joke, i probably memorize a few of the chapters from rereading it alone. holy fuck,,, as you can tell, i have a pattern when it comes to my fave fics and it’s all about: GAY PANIC THE MUSICAL!! yea... i just really like fics about self-discovery because MAN as a young adult traversing the mysteries of human nature and sexuality, i sincerely relate to namjoon in this fic. “am i gay, or am i just gay for my best friend?” is a question i have asked myself NUMEROUS times... dear god, namjoon is just a walking catastrophe and i!! could not!! relate!! more!! the plot flow and immersion you get from this fic is out of this world. you almost feel like you’re in the same frat as them!! i also love the way op made even the side characters have their own story arcs and backgrounds... they are what inspired me to give life to even the smallest of characters bc it just heightens the reading experience imo!! they really do feel like your friends in this fic, and this fic will always be my sources of comfort.

➤ for jimin:

darling, just say you’ll say by tusaisbts [yoonmin] - have i not sung this fic enough praises? i know it looks weird from the premise... cowboys? mail order brides? i thought it was odd at first too, but believe me when i say you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover. jimin’s growth as a character here left me absolutely speechless!! i just love his development: from a scared stranger dropped off in the middle of nowhere to a smart and capable teacher who can hold his own in this small rural town. i especially love how he interacts with yoongi, because op really makes you want to root for them. you want them to fall in love, to make their relationship work out. that yearning for two characters to get together is something i want my own readers to feel, and there aren’t enough words in my vernacular to explain how happy i was when everything turned out well. and jfc... rancher yoongi? got me so fucking hot n bothered and now i will forever be enamored by the thought of rugged yoongi... jfc...

➤ for taehyung (& jimin!!):

mudlands & yellow acacia by nonheather [vmin] - i remember the day i read this like it was yesterday. i had a final to study for, but instead i read this entire thing in one go and then i cried my eyes out even until the moment i walked into my exam room. i don’t know how else to describe this other than it was otherworldly. it was cozy. it was heartbreaking and magical and downright lovely. i especially loved the way taehyung was here... so fucking whipped for park jimin. he loved like no other man could, and jimin might have been a little too bullheaded at first, but they make it out okay. i’m not really one to believe in soulmates, but this fic almost made me believe they could be. it made me yearn for the first time, and i think that counts for something. to love another person and to have them love you back... op made me believe in love. 

➤ for jungkook:

years since you’ve been here by ameliabedelias [namkook] - okay maybe i’m just a crybaby and i cry at every fic under the sun but dear god this fic... might be The Fic That Changed Me As A Person. like, of course the other fics were mindblowing but this one in particular... wow. trampled all my expectations and caused a garden to bloom in my heart. jungkook is so sweet, so lost... he feels too much and he aches for namjoon. i know all too well that feeling of melancholy... when you love someone you’re not supposed to. coming of age stories will always have a soft spot in my heart, because i always tend to project myself onto the main characters. i want to grow and find my own destiny. i want to learn and be happy. jungkook finds his way, tumbles and trips the entire time, but he gets there. a symbol of queer triumph.

[foreverfangirlalways]

The Astronomer and The Florist (Chapter 6)

Summery: Anxiety over feelings, dissing Michael, and FLIRTING!!!

Ships: Analogical & Royality

Warning: really cheesy flirting and a shared hatred for Michael

-let me know if I need to add more warnings-

----

Logan worked diligently until his phone went off. He looked over at his phone and saw that there was only 15 minutes until he was able to go home. He also saw that Virgil had just texted him.

Logan looks down at his map, and figured he could complete it tomorrow. He was so filled by anger and hatred that it was already 3/4 of the way done.

Logan packed everything up, and then headed for the door. As soon as he was outside he check to see what Virgil texted him.

VIRGIL: Hey Logan. I hope I’m not bothering you at work, but I was just wondering what type of container you want a bouquet put in?

LOGAN: Preferably a toilet or something that would hurt when I break it over his smug, overconfident, insufferable head.

Virgil didn’t respond, and Logan started to wonder if he should have been less harsh. Then his phone deemed.

VIRGIL: Patton said no to the toilets, so how about an ugly vase? That way you don’t feel bad for breaking it???

Logan busted out laughing, instantly growing more fond of Virgil.

LOGAN: That sounds wonderful! I’m sorry, I had a bad day at work. I went to go get your Plus 1 Card for the party, and Michael was there. He said some other rude things that made me upset and then he insulted and made comments about you, and I almost punched him.

VIRGIL: Oh damn Lo! I’m sorry you had such a crappy day, but please don’t get fired on my account. So if you did, I might be able to convince Patton to hire you at the flower shop!

Logan chuckled at that as he walked into his living room. He sat on his couch and realize that he never told Virgil about Professor Sanders.

LOGAN: Actually, I might have a job lined up already.

VIRGIL: Oh? Do tell

VIRGIL: Does the job have anything to do with the ‘thank you’ bouquet?

LOGAN: Yes, as a matter of fact it does. After we had stopped texting last night I contacted my old Astronomy Professor. I told him about what you help me realize, and he said that he is retiring and he’s going to ask the board on Friday if I can be his successor!

VIRGIL: That’s awesome Logan! I’m glad I could help, but please don’t credit me too much. All I did was suggest it.

Logan chuckled at Virgil’s modesty.

LOGAN: Virgil, without you I never would have contacted Professor Sanders, and I never would be able to give Michael his ‘fuck you’ bouquet.

VIRGIL: lol

VIRGIL: This Michael guy sounds like an asshole though

LOGAN: Oh, Michael N. Oshow is the King of assholes

VIRGIL: Wait, I know that name...

Virgil looked over at Patton, who was trying and failing to look like he isn’t reading over Virgil’s shoulder.

“Hey Pat, does the name Michael Oshow ring any bells?”

Patton thought for a minute, and then raised his hand.

“Oh, I know! That’s Elliot’s ex!”

“Ohhh!” Virgil exclaimed, realization covering his face.

VIRGIL: THAT IS ELLIOT’S ASSHOLE OF AN EX!!!

Logan reread the text, trying to think of a time when he overheard Michael talking about an Elliot. Coming up with nothing, he decided to ask Virgil about it.

LOGAN: Um, who’s Elliot?

VIRGIL: Elliot is this really sweet friend of mine who dated Michael. Michael turned out to be a complete douche and treated Elliot awfully. Luckily, with a bit of help, Elliot was able to figure out that they relationship was toxic. Elliot told me that Michael is still a little bitter because Elliot broke up with him, and not the other way around.

LOGAN: That’s truly awful! Since you already know about Michael, and how he can be, if you don’t want to go to the Party anymore I understand.

VIRGIL: Ha! You can’t get rid of me that easily! I don’t care of Michael will be there, I just want to go with you.

Logan smushed his face into a pillow, not caring that no one could see him blushing. He was happy to stay smothering himself until his phone went off again. He quickly picked it up and read the text from Virgil.

VIRGIL: that is, if you still want me to go?

Shit!

LOGAN: Of course I do! Nothing would make me happier, I just don’t want to make you uncomfortable.

VIRGIL: Pshh, I can just punch Michael for you. I’m sure Elliot would love it too, as long as you caught it on video *wink wink*

Logan laughed at Virgil’s antics. LOGAN: are you suggesting that I record you assaulting my bosses nephew?

VIRGIL: Not when you put it like that! That sounds awful!

VIRGIL: I want you to record me punching a guy who is a jerk to you and an asshole ex to a good friend.

LOGAN: well, that actually sounds like it would be amusing.

VIRGIL: Yeah, but how about we stop talking about Michael and start talking about us.

Logan didn’t respond as fast, so Virgil went back over his last text. He then realized something.

VIRGIL: I’m sorry! That sounded awfully presumptuous of me, please don’t be mad!!!

After a minute and a half, Logan started texting back. So Virgil deleted the 5 paragraph apology he had written out, but still copied it, just in case.

LOGAN: Sorry, I was making something to eat. And it’s not presumptuous of you at all. I gave you a bouquet of flowers that meant ‘thank you’ and ‘I like you’, and then proceeded to ask you out on a romantic outing. You said yes, so naturally I wouldn’t mind talking about an ‘us’

Virgil stared at his phone, his mouth hung open. Patton giggled at his expression.

“You better close your mouth or you’ll catch flies!”

Virgil closed his mouth and started texting Logan again.

VIRGIL: You mean that?

LOGAN: Of course. Naturally, I would like to get you know you a bit better first, but I think that you are an attractive, sweet, intelligent, and caring person. And know this after only two days. I would love for our relationship to grow into something more in the future.

Virgil was full on blushing at this point, and smiling like a doofus. He started texting again, and Patton snuck a picture of him.

Patton sent the picture to Logan with the caption-

‘Look how happy you make him! ’

Logan open a text from Patton, who’s number Virgil had given him yesterday as an precaution.

It was a picture of Virgil, smiling one of the most gorgeous smiles Logan had ever seen, with a faint blush across his cheeks. Logan read the caption and Felt an overwhelming sense of happiness erupt in his chest.

PATTON: oh, by the way, you break his heart and all use Roman to find whatever brings you the most joy and all destroy it.

PATTON: I hope you have a nice night and stay safe!

Logan reread those last texts from Patton multiple times. Patton seem like he couldn’t hurt a fly, and now he had Logan slightly terrified of him.

Logan swallowed, and then opened a new text from Virgil.

VIRGIL: I would like that too! I’m super excited to spend time with you at the Party tomorrow, and maybe next time we could go stargazing??

VIRGIL: You could show me the stars from Mind Palace Meadow!

VIRGIL: IF YOU WANT!

VIRGIL: or we could just go get coffee 🤷‍♂️

Logan smiles at his phone, think of just how adorable Virgil is. He knows he has only known hind for two days, but it feels like so much longer.

LOGAN: Why not both? After I get my whole job thing situated, I can show you my favorite spot in the meadow, we’ll go stargazing, and then we can get some coffee afterwards. Or before, whichever you prefer.

Virgil full on squealed. Like, legit squealed. Patton was so shocked that he fell off if his stool.

After making sure Patton is ok, Virgil told him how Logan basically just asked him out on a second date. But, one that felt like it would be considered the first date.

Patton jumped up and down and hugged Virgil. He then sent Virgil home to get some rest!

(Read: He sent Virgil home so he could fangirl to Roman privately.)

Virgil laughed and headed out the door. He then got a thing on his phone, reminding him that he never texted Logan back.

LOGAN: i’m sorry, was that too much too soon?

VIRGIL: NO!

VIRGIL: Sorry, I’m walking home and forgot to text you back. I would love to go stargazing with you. We could get coffee before hand and then go eat breakfast afterwards.

Virgil made it all the way home and into his bedroom before Logan texted him back.

LOGAN: Excellent.

LOGAN: It’s a date then.

Virgil dropped his phone onto his bed and then squealed into his pillows, feeling like a teenage girl but not caring in the slightest.

Taglist-

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@sanders-sides-with-quinn

@aleiimm

@yikesdodson

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