#when i was like 15 or 16 she let me use her laptop for something and she had a bookmarked reddit page

[vaugarde]

random fun fact abt me i just remembered: my mom might have started to support me abt my adhd and mental health issues bc of reddit

[skipper1331]

Public? // Felicitas Rauch

a/n: based off this request. Hope you like it:)

The tension was thick at home.

Felicitas loved you.

You loved Felicitas.

But that didn‘t change the fact that there was this strange atmosphere ever since the two of you had one of your biggest fight ever.

-

At the age of 15, Feli and you met.

At the age of 16, she asked you out on a date.

After several dates, you asked you to be her girlfriend - it took you some weeks to build up the courage to do so.

At the age of 23, Feli asked you to marry her.

At the age of 24, the two of you were happily married.

Both of you seemed to be happy - you were, but something in Felis mindset shifted which had led to your argument.

She hated that she couldn‘t wear her ring.

She hated that nobody knew she was married.

For the world, you didn’t exist - that‘s how many people knew about you.

You‘re her wife.

She wanted to show everybody how much in love she was with you.

She wanted to post pictures with you,

she wanted to hold your hand in public,

she wanted to be seen with you.

You‘re everything to her and nobody knew about it.

-

It started as a simple conversation.

"Liebe, can we talk about something?" the German asked, taking a seat in front of you. You looked up from your laptop, putting the pen down, so your complete attention was on her. "Is everything alright?" you questioned, a big frown displayed over your features. It was never a good sign to start conversations like that, "what‘s wrong?"

The defender took a deep breath before she answered straightforward, "be my wife." which came out ruder than intended.

Confused, you looked at her, "I am"

"You‘re not" she declared, her jaw tense.

"What‘re you talking about?" you closed your laptop, "does that mean nothing?" wiggling with your ringfinger.

"No" she didn‘t want to get mad but slowly anger started to float through her body, all her emotions discovering the surface, "because I can‘t wear mine!"

Taken back by her outburst, you matched her tone, "that‘s not my fault! You‘re the athlete, not me"

"You wanted us to be private!" her voice raised, "I could‘ve easily taped my ring" with her finger at the brick of nose, she tried to calm down. That’s not the way she wanted it to turn out - not at all.

"I want to be public" she stated, this time a much softer voice talking to you. The voice you could listen hours to.

"I don’t!"

With her voice level back angry and heart hurt, she growled, "Why not?!"

"I don‘t want to"

Your answer only made her angrier as she stood up and walked around the kitchen counter to pour herself a glass of water.

"That‘s not a reason!"

"You know what?!" leaving the chair, you gathered your notes, "I don‘t have to explain myself"

Feli could only watch as you took your laptop and walked away, in the direction of the front door.

Quickly, she followed you, stopping you in your tracks as she grabbed your wrist, her touch gentle, "Where are you going?"

"Away from you!" you felt so hurt, the insult of not being her wife. Was this whole marriage a joke to her?

"Y/n" she started, the hurt on your face visible for her, "please-"

"No, i got the message" you grumbled, "it‘s yours" angrily you took of the ring, slamming it down on the shelf.

Maybe it was childish to take off your ring but you felt helpless. She had been your girlfriend for many years and your wife for a few years, but never, never ever had she hurt you as much with a statement as she just did.

You left shortly after, Feli standing in the hall with an empty expression on her, your ring between her fingers.

She fucked up. She really did and she knew.

-

It was dark outside, 10 minutes before midnight and you still weren‘t home which made her anxious. The varnish of her nails was peeled off, her leg hobbling up and down and her mind racing with worst case scenarios.

Liebe❤️

When are you coming home?

please let me know

Even though you were hurt, you replied to her text. You hated it not reply to her texts and you could imagine how she was feeling, you hated it too when you didn’t know when she was coming home.

You

one hour.

Feli was laying in bed, anxiously watching the clock in your bedroom as she waited for you to come home. There was no way she would fall asleep before she knew you were safely at home.

Exactly an hour later, you opened the front door, walking into your home, eyes puffy and red. The defender didn’t leave the bed, she didn’t try to approach you nor talk to you. She wanted to let you be. Yet that didn‘t stop her from hoping you would join her in bed.

And you did.

Wordlessly you laid down, your back facing her. The German felt her heart sink, usually you would always cuddle her - she really had fucked up.

It took you about 20 minutes before you fell asleep, your body physically exhausted, Feli still wide awake. As your soft snores filled the room the defender was quick to decide what her next move would be. She couldn’t sleep without holding you, so that‘s what she did. Her arms snuggled around waist as she pulled you close, your body relaxing in her touch. She would make it up to you - that was a promise.

-

You woke up alone in bed, the wolfsburg player nowhere to be seen. Making your way out of bed, dressed in a oversized shirt and shorts, you walked in the kitchen, the smell of pancakes hitting your nostrils, "good morning" you muttered as you rubbed your eyes, taking on seat at the bar stool.

"Hey" the german whispered as she took you in, "I made you breakfast" she handed you the plate which was filled with pancakes.

"Thank you"

It was silent for a few moments.

"I‘m sorry" your wife started, "I’m so sorry. You‘re my wife no matter if the world knows that or not- I shouldn’t have yelled at you and I’m so sorry for insulting you like that" she inhaled sharply, turning to you as she gently interwined your fingers, "I love you. You are everything to me"

"Your comment hurt me" you whispered, your head falling against her shoulder as she instantly wrapped her arms around you. Silent tears streamed down your face as she mumbled sweet nothings in your ear.

"I‘m so sorry, baby" multiple kisses were pressed against your head, "I don’t wanna be public if you don‘t want to. I want you to be happy"

Her hands cupped your cheeks as she made you look at her, her eyes determined with her statement, "I love you"

-

"Can you tell me why you don‘t want to be public?" she asked one evening as she held you in her arms with the tv playing in the background. Her tone was gentle, understanding and as if she would accept every answer, she just had to know an answer.

"I like privacy"

And even though, it was indeed true that you enjoyed your privacy, the real reason to stay in secret was because you were afraid. You feared the public and their words. You didn‘t want your relationship to break down because her fans didn‘t like you or your looks or the fact that you don’t play nor enjoy football.

Just you and her.

-

The topic wasn‘t brought up again yet you could see how it killed Feli from day to day, how much it hurt her to take off her ring every morning. Her eyes stopped shining the way they used to, her smile didn‘t reach the corner of her eyes anymore - the light was missing.

She loved you, she really did and she still treated you like a princess but not wearing her ring, not having the opportunity to show you off left her heart in pain.

Which is why you did what you did one day after her training.

The defender came home with a smile tugged on her lips as she told you about her day.

After her story about the day, "I‘m going to shower, baby" she stated, pressing multiple kisses to your cheeks before she walked towards the bathroom, her phone resting on the kitchen counter.

When you heard the shower, it was safe to say that she wouldn‘t come out of the bathroom for at least 20 minutes.

Snatching her phone from the counter, you made yourself comfortable on the couch. Feli never had a problem if you take her phone, she had nothing to hide and was fully convinced that you would never control her which was true. Never ever would you stalk through her phone or anything, most of the time when you used her phone was for music, hay day or when she asked you to reply to someone. You trusted each other blindly and more than anything, so opening instagram, you did the thing that made her happy, hopefully.

You revealed your marriage with a simple post.

Within seconds her phone blew off, notification after notification.

feli_rauch

jule_brand and 20.364 others

feli_rauch 🤍

When Feli left the bathroom, you were happily cooking some dinner as music played softly in the background. You swayed with the beat, humming along the lyrics as you prepared your meal.

In the meantime Feli walked in the living room as she heard her phone ring constantly. What was happening?

And then she saw it.

Over a thousand notifications on instagram.

Why?

Your post.

"Liebe!" she yelled while she quickly entered the kitchen.

"Ye-" you‘re cut of as lips were pressed against your own, strong arms wrapping around your waist.

Feli kissed you with every inch of love in her body,

she kissed you with so much happiness,

she kissed you with a new found passion.

When air became a problem, you pulled away, the defender chasing after your lips for multiple pecks.

"What was that?" you asked, completely out of breath, lips swollen and chest heavily rising and falling.

Replying with "A thank you" she cupped your cheeks, thumb softly caressing it, "for the- that the world knows I‘m married and happily so"

your cheeks turned red, her gaze so intense as it was filled with love. She smiled brightly at you, a smile that reached the corner of her eyes.

"I‘m sorry for being so secretive, I was afraid of the outcome- the media and fans but I’m done with it. I love you and it‘s time for everyone to know" you stated in a firm voice, ready to fight the world if needed.

"I‘m so in love with you"

-

Since that day, there hasn't been a day where Felicitas took off her wedding ring. In games, she would tape it up, the same as in training. It was her good luck charm and everybody should know it.

—————

[thalialunacy]

[for the @calaisreno May Prompt-a-long, and based on a true story.]

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) 9: intimidation (10) (11) (12) (13) (14) (15) (16) (17)

John jerks his head up from his laptop the second he realises something alarming:

The flat is quiet.

'Sherlock.'

'Hmm?' Sherlock doesn't look up from his experiment.

'Where's Rosie?'

Sherlock raises his hand to point. 'She's right--' He finally actually raises his head. 'Oh. Dear.'

'Hell,' John curses, ignoring a shot of pain as he stands too quickly.

Sherlock's Voice of Reason tendencies are very useful here. He puts himself in front of John and forces his gaze. 'Don't let's panic. She didn't grow wings, nor is it likely she suddenly gained the physical capacity to climb a baby gate. So she's just hidden herself somewhere. She probably thinks it's a game. You search the sitting room, I'll take the loo and then the kitchen. Alright?'

John nods, and promises himself he'll show Sherlock his appreciation later. Possibly with something beyond the snatched kisses they've managed so far. 'Alright.'

Three minutes later, he hears Sherlock's long sigh. 'John.' John strides over to where the detective is standing in front of his bedroom door. 'Apparently…'

'It locks?'

'It locks.'

'What about the second loo door?'

Sherlock grimaces. 'I always keep that one locked from the inside.'

'Alright, where's your key?'

'I don't have a key for either door. Never did do.'

John leans in towards the door. 'Rosie?' he calls, trying to keep his tone calm.

'Yeah, Daddy!'

The air escapes his lungs in a great dirty whoosh. 'Oh thank Christ,' he mutters. He raises his head and turns to Sherlock. 'Can you go see if--'

Sherlock's already halfway out the kitchen door, calling back, 'I'm sure she'll have one.'

But Mrs Hudson does not, in fact, have one, she tells John once she's come upstairs, wringing her hands as best she can with her wrist in a soft cast. 'I'm sorry! I'll call a locksmith straight away.'

'Nonsense,' Sherlock says over her. 'My lockpicks are, unhelpfully, behind the locked door, but I bet you could get me a hairpin and a nail file, please?'

John looks at Mrs Hudson and shrugs. 'Not things I keep on hand, I'm afraid.'

'Oh, pah, you boys. I'll be back in a tic.'

'Do you think you can actually pick it?' John asks quietly as soon as he can hear her feet on the stairs.

'Erm…possibly.'

'Possibly.'

'It's quite old and disused, John.'

'And?'

'And that means rust. Decay. Mechanisms that don't work anymore.'

'Christ,' John mutters. He puts his forehead to the door again. 'Sweetheart?' he calls.

'Daddy?'

'Will you open the door for me, Rosie?'

'Ermmm, no,' she says clearly.

'God grant me patience,' he says to himself, and jerks his head up when he hears Sherlock laugh.

'Sorry,' Sherlock says, clearly not sorry at all, 'but you sound like my mother.'

'Yes, I'd imagine she needed a deep well of patience to raise you.'

'Endless. Rosamund?' he says to the door. 'Do you want to unlock that door so you can help me with an experiment?'

John eyes him, but if it works, then--

'Nope,' she replies, popping her P like a certain someone.

'She's evil,' John mutters.

'She's stubborn.'

'She gets that from you.'

'I beg your pardon,' Sherlock says, quite offended. 'I am reasonable.'

'Sure. When you're not being stubborn.'

Sherlock pivots very unsubtly. 'Ms Watson, if you unlock that door, then Mrs Hudson will bake you some of those cakes you like.'

John pushes against his shoulder. 'Her wrist is broken!' he whispers incredulously.

'We can buy some at the bakery,' Sherlock whispers back. 'She'll never know.'

'You're evil.'

'Yes, well, you let me past the threshold, so you can really only blame yourself.'

'No, thank you!' Rosie calls back.

John rolls his eyes. 'Sure, she's polite for Mrs Hudson.'

'Clever.'

'Not helpful.'

'We could try intimidation.'

'Could we, though?' John asks, bemused.

'You can be very intimidating when you like, despite your stature.'

'Thanks,' he replies dryly.

But before they can debate the merits of trying to intimidate a toddler into doing anything, Mrs Hudson re-appears with the requested items. 'Oh, I do hope you can pick it, Sherlock. I will be very disappointed in your skills otherwise, you speak so highly of them.'

John coughs a laugh into his hand. 'Thanks, Mrs H.'

Twenty minutes later, though, John's growing desperate, texting everyone in his phone to see if they have any brilliant ideas. Wondering how much it would cost to just lift the door off it's hinges.

In the end, he should have known to just ring Molly first. 'Just put me on, okay?' she says quickly. John does as requested. 'Hi, Rosie!' she says cheerfully via speakerphone.

John and Sherlock exchange a look. 'Rosie,' John says, trying to keep his tone pleasantly neutral. 'If you come out, you can talk to Aunt Molly,'

They all hold their breath.

Then the lock turns.

[❤️]

[fawnandshadows]

How You Get The Girl

Chapter 16

Chapter 15

AO3

Warnings: Language

“You’re sure this is what you want?” Azriel asked seriously, eyeing the layout that Elain had prepared in front of him. “For our first date?” 

Elain shifted her weight from foot to foot, inspecting and dissecting his reaction. A slow smile spread across his lips and Elain instantly felt lighter. 

His hazel eyes crinkled at her. 

“Because I might be a bit overdressed.” Azriel admitted, motioning to his white button down and black jeans. 

“It was perfect for the first part of our night.” Elain reminded him, clasping her hands behind her back. 

Azriel brought a hand up to hide his smile with a press of his finger tips, and once his smile was officially contained he pulled at the paperclip in his ear. His two black hoop cartilage piercings jolting at the movement. 

“That’s true,” Azriel said in a soft, fond way, giving Elain a small nod, “But I must admit,” He looked up grinning devilishly at her. “This is not how I imagined being invited into your bed.” 

A blush dusted her cheeks as she said, “But it’s a pretty good alternative, right?” 

Azriel chuckled. A sound that came from deep in his chest and nuzzled against the back of his throat. 

He tilted his head at her and asked, “Survivor?” 

Elain nodded eagerly, a sunshine-like smile overflowing on her face. 

“I used to watch it all the time with Nesta and Feyre when we were younger, but then everyone got busy. So, I thought it might be nice if we binged the seasons on Netflix — but only if you want to. We can watch something else, or maybe go somewhere? I just thought we could utilize the empty apartment.” 

Azriel tugged at his earring again. 

“I like the way you think, Elain,” Azriel admitted in a full voice, taking a step towards her to grasp one of her hands. “And I’d love to return the favor one day.” 

Elain grinned at him, a giddiness building within her stomach at the touch of his hand. 

“You’re going to cook a steak dinner for me?” Elain teased, angling her chin up at him, squeezing his hand. “And bake me cookies for dessert?” 

Azriel took his hand that was tangled with hers and wrapped it around her back, never letting go of her hand and pinning it behind her back, and then did the same with her other hands. 

“Not quite what I had in mind,” Azriel admitted, bringing his head down to hers. “But on my next day off I know the perfect place to take you.” His voice dropped to a whisper. 

“Oh,” Elain said, following his lead and whispering in her room, behind closed doors in her empty apartment. “And where’s that?” 

His head dropped closer to hers so that the lips of their noses touched. 

“And spoil the surprise?” Azriel teased, taking up the entire scope of her vision. 

Elain hummed in response, not sure what she wanted to say, but not wanting to break this moment with him. 

His lips brushed lightly against hers. Barely touching. So briefly that Elain wasn’t even sure it qualified as a kiss. 

“So,” Azriel leaned back, looking rumpled and amused, his hands still holding hers. “Survivor.” 

Elain nodded. 

“Survivor,” She confirmed again. “I think Rhys has clothes stashed in Feyre’s room, if you want me to grab some? Or - Oh!” Elain broke off with a smile. “I still have your sweatshirt you can borrow, and a t-shirt.” 

Azriel shook his head, dropping one of his hands and using the other to guide her to her bed. He sat down, propping himself against her headboard and the wall.

Elain let herself be pulled down with him, smiling as she settled in between his legs, she curled into herself just a bit as the skirt of her dress raised. His large hand rested on her hip and Elain grinned as she stared at her paused laptop screen — the two of them laid down with neither of them rushing to hit play on the laptop facing them. 

After a moment Elain said, “One of us will have to hit play.” 

She turned her head to gaze up at him and saw Azriel gazing down at her with crinkled eyes and a small smile. 

“If you say so.” 

Neither of them moved, but after a beat Elain crawled across the bed to hit play, and before she settled back into his lap she urged Present Elain to save this moment as vividly as she could so that Future Elain could go back and relive it as many times as possible. 

Azriel, with his crumpled white button down that he had rolled up to his elbows — exposing the scarred skin along the length of his forearms and hands. His messy black hair tousled on top of his beautiful face…that beautiful face wearing a sleepy grin as he took her in. 

He was staring at her so intently that the little voice in Elain’s mind was convinced he was doing the same exact thing. Capturing her in this moment. 

Soon enough, Elain settled back into his embrace. The steady beating of his heart was felt along the length of her back. 

“This is a perfect first date,” Elain said, watching the screen moving in front of her. “Thank you.” She snuggled further into him. 

It was an odd feeling, one that was both electrifying and relaxing. That Azriel could cause her to feel so at peace and so thrilled all at once.

Elain wasn’t sure if she wanted to fall asleep in Azriel’s arms, or enjoy the way his hard body pressed against her soft one. 

In the end, her body decided for her. 

She didn’t even notice that she had fallen asleep until the apartment door slammed shut — jolting her heavy eyelids up. 

She could hear the whispers of Feyre and Rhysand on the opposite side of the wall as they attempted to sneak into the house. After a few minutes their whispers disappeared behind the soft shut of Feyre’s bedroom door. 

The paused laptop screen still illuminated her room, and Elain glanced up to see Azriel sleeping. Still in the same propped up position, but his head tilted forward and at an awkward angle. His long lashes cast heavy shadows over his sharp cheekbone. 

His paperclip gleaming from the light of the screen in the dark. 

Elain didn’t even attempt to hide she smile as she whispered, “Azriel.” 

His eyelids twitched, but his breathing remained even and deep. 

“Azzzz.” Elain said just a bit louder in a sing-song voice.

Still nothing. 

Elain bit her lip in contemplation, and then leaned forward and pressed her lips to his. After a moment Elain felt his lips move against hers and then his hands tightened on her hips, making little divots in her flesh. 

Azriel leaned into her, his lips increasing pressure against hers as he kissed her back. 

Elain melted further into his body, letting herself spiral into his kiss. 

It was sleepy. Not rushed. Leisurely.  

Perfect. 

“Good morning,” Elain breathed, breaking off the kiss and leaning her forehead against his. 

“Morning?” Azriel asked, smirking a bit as he took in the darkness in the room. 

“Two in the morning, if I had to guess,” Elain replied, her heart skittering as Azriel’s hands slipped to capture her waist, moving the fabric of her dress with his fingers. “We fell asleep. Feyre and Rhys just came home.” 

Azriel nodded his head in understanding and said, “I can’t believe I fell asleep.” And when Elain tilted her head in confusion he continued. “I have trouble sleeping.” 

“So do I,” Elain admitted with a hesitant smile. “But on the brightside it’s when I get some of my best writing done.” 

Azriel smiled lazily at her. 

“I like to sketch at night as well.” 

“I remember.” Elain grinned, recalling their night together on the bus. 

Azriel’s smile brightened, as if he was thinking the same thing. 

“I should go.” He said softly, not wanting to leave. 

Elain nodded in agreement and forced herself away from his warm body. Even though it was the dead of summer, she felt cold without him. 

Her eyes followed the length of his body as he stretched and stood — she wrapped her arms around her legs so that she wouldn’t reach for him and ask him to stay. 

He ran a hand through his dark curls as he stood in front of her, not wanting to walk to the door. 

“I guess this is goodbye —”

“Wait!” Elain whisper shouted, scrambling to her knees. Azriel’s eyes widened a bit at the movement. “We forgot about your blowjob.” 

Elain leaned back on her knees and looked at him with wide eyes as he dropped his head into his hands — his shoulders shaking as he laughed silently. 

He moved his long fingers out of the way, gazing at her through his hands, as he looked down at her. He moved his hand and pressed a fist to his mouth. 

“Elain,” He said through gentle laughter. “I don’t expect you to give me a blowjob.” 

“But I want to.” 

He leaned forward and grasped her cheeks between his rough hands. 

“Elain, as much as it pains me to say this, I didn’t even get you off when I was giving you head.” 

“It was still better than —” 

Azriel crushed his lips to hers, cutting her off. 

“Please don’t say his name.” Az mumbled against her lips. 

“Sorry.” Elain said before wrapping her arms around his neck and capturing his lips in one more kiss. 

His hands left her face and settled onto her hips — his fingers balling into the fabric of her dress. 

“I love kissing you.” Azriel said into their kiss. 

Elain hummed in agreement, sliding one hand down his chest — over his muscle-hardened stomach — before her fingers found the band of his jeans and tugged. 

“Are you sure you don’t want one?” She tugged again. 

“I’m trying to be a gentleman, Elain.” Azriel groaned softly. One of his hands drifted up to tangle in her hair. 

She popped the button through its hole. 

“I’ve always thought,” She pulled his zipper down slowly. “That gentlemen were overrated.” 

—————

tagging: @123moiaussi @fuckmelifesucks @thefangirlofhp @sakurakittypeach @nikethestatue @tswaney17 @impossiblescissorspeachpaper @feyredarlinq @duskwhisperer @nyxreads @rinadragomir @secretpuppyflower @captainbrucebanner @ultadverb @irisesforelain @shedoessoshedoes  @magnolia-blossom87 @sheenabeene @nivem565  @casuallivi @rhysiedarling @elain99-blog @athena-85 @swankii-art-teacher @reverie-tales @jujugirlfrombookstore @shadowflorecita @shy-violet-soul @thisloveseternal

[ruinedruminations]

Answer the questions and tag the fanfiction authors you know:

Thank you @mathiwrites for the tag! I decided to do this on my writing focused blog. @tamlinfairchild

How did you get into writing fanfiction?

I started out writing for fandoms almost sixteen years ago during one of my family’s last vacations together. I remember specifically hauling our very chunky and dependable laptop around the resort and curling up on various benches at age twelve to type out sentences. The work that I completed that week, as embarrassing as it is, I keep in my memory box as a dedication to what has become such a huge part of my life.

How many fandoms have you written in?

Glory. Officially on Archive of Our Own, I have written things for A Court of Thorns & Roses, The Chronicles of Narnia, and Supergirl.

The Chronicles of Narnia is what drew me into the depth of world building, characters, and writing in general. I will always have a special place for it in my heart. The original character whom I created sixteen years ago for that story still accompanies me to this day. I know her better now, as one gets to know a friend. She will likely find a home in my original works as that fantasy world expands.

Supergirl had my heart for multiple years and is what got me into working on one project for an extended amount of time. I was writing a long haul with @fangirlintheforest. We met and had a strong laugh over the fact that we have the same name. We are still friends to this day.

I believe I only wrote around 20k words to that story in a year, which I have now proven I am capable of doing in a month; but it was the first time I sat down and shared my ideas with someone in the way I do today.

How many years have you been writing fanfiction?

15 going on 16 years. I started original work four or five years ago.

Do you read or write more fanfiction?

I certainly write more than I read. Often, I can’t stop writing. Occasionally, I’ve written a sentence or two at a stoplight. I definitely have skipped dinner or stayed in from gatherings in order to let the words in my brain flow from my own. Writing is a core function of who I am.

I love to read fanfiction. My favorites of all time are definitely in the Dramione fandom. Some of their works have been very influential on me.

However, when I am writing fanfiction, I tend to avoid reading anything about the characters I am currently working with unless asked.

What is one way you've improved as a writer?

I could go on and on; but the three biggest things I’ve learned in the past two years are:

One — be your own biggest fan. especially when writing original content, you will not always have readers there by your side during creation. reread your own writing more often with excitement and love than you do with criticism. the kinder you are to your mistakes, the easier they are to correct.

Two — write for you. why did you begin this story? deep inside you know the reason why. you may lack the words for it (funny, right?) but the flame is there. start it for you, finish it to make yourself proud.

Three — just write. write it badly; but don’t let anything stop you from not writing it at all.

Do you have any bad habits as a writer?

Perfectionism and avoidance. I struggle ending stories even when I know scene by scene how it goes. I think it’s important to realize that writing your conclusion is not a death, especially for the first book of many, but an opportunity.

What's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

Probably things on Psychopaths, Criminals, and truly dark details about death.

What's your favourite type of comment to receive on your work?

Honestly, I’m used to not getting many. So seeing them is still a bit surreal. However, I love when people point out that something truly touched their heart or made them notice something new. My emotions bleed into my words and so has the healing and trauma recovery that I have experienced in the last five years. Being able to share my grief, healing, and hope with others in ways that makes them feel seen and heard is truly what calls to my heart as a writer.

What's the most fringe trope/topic you write about?

I’m not super fringe. I think the plot that I enjoy which I’ve heard is unpopular is a pregnancy trope. I have always enjoyed writing them, I’m not entirely sure why. I have health conditions that prevent me from having children of my own and I think incorporating that into my fiction is probably a very good outlet for me.

What is the hardest type of story for you to write?

I am still learning how to write good action scenes and humor. Humor is still probably what I would consider my biggest challenge.

What is the easiest type?

Lyrical, emotional prose

Where do you do your writing? What platform? When?

I currently use GoogleDocs and am hoping to switch platforms soon. I want to start doing things with this blog as well. I’ve considered making a YouTube Channels about learning how to write.

What is something you've been too nervous/intimidated to write, but would love to write one day?

I approach a lot of different topics, because I believe that even if I haven’t experienced something — if you step into someone else’s shoes with empathy — your own pain will translate.

But, the one thing that does intimidate me is cancel culture. I am still working through my fear of publishing because of the recent changes to fandom and reading. Authors get devoured and critiqued down to the most intimate details of their lives. Critique is important and I am probably one of the biggest free speech advocates out there, but it still scares me.

Working with beta readers and listening to people who have outside experiences helps me look at my own work new ways; but I’ve also had to accept and acknowledge that no book can ever be perfect for everyone. That is part of why we write fanfiction. As an hopeful future author, I hope that I could embrace that.

What made you choose your username?

My main blog is positivelyruined, which is a line from one of my favorite books of last year: Assistant to the Villain. I decided I wanted something that matched and this fit the bill.

[charmsandtealeaves]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you for the tags @theresthesnitch & @annabtg. I'm finally sitting at my laptop so I can do this (and have given up with the formatting being all over the shop).

How many works do you have on AO3? 72 total, but 31 are currently hidden away in a private collection and can't be seen.

2. What's your total A03 words count?

According to the stats page 308,146 3. What fandoms do you write for?

Just HP 4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? A.) Brown Boots & Breakfast Bagels Rated M, jily AU. Complete Multichapter. Lily’s love life was a tragedy of epic proportions and she had no brilliant strategy. But a chance encounter ends in a one night stand that blows her mind and leaves her wanting more. There’s just one problem… she doesn’t even know his name.

B.) One More Sleep (currently hidden) Rated G, Sirius raising harry oneshot. Three year old Harry Potter is very eager to stay awake and catch Santa Claus delivering him presents.

C.) Call Me By Name Rated E, Jily AU. WIP Multichapter. After a not-so-great breakup with a not-so-great boyfriend, Lily comes to the conclusion that if you want something done right you have to do it yourself. Whether mechanically, hydraulically, or auditorily? She WILL find the key to that currently unreachable pleasure.

D.) Evans Guide To Quidditch (and seducing James Potter) Rated M, Hogwarts Jily, oneshot. It had all started out innocently enough, a small wager between housemates on the outcome of the Arrows Vs Catapults game over the weekend. Lily hadn't intended to let slip she knew more about quidditch than she was letting on. Or to set up a fantasy quidditch league with James, but well... what's the harm?

E.) Stripped Back To Basics Rated M, Jily AU, oneshot collab with @athenasparrow In which Petunia probably regrets telling Lily to "put herself out there." Or: A Jily "Naked Attraction" AU (YES NAKED ATTRACTION IS A REAL SHOW!!!)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? I used to respond to some comments, but these days I try to respond to everyone who comments even if it's just an emoji as a like "hi yes thank you for your comment I see you I just don't know what to say!"

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angtiest ending? I don't know if I've ever written an angst ending... nothing springs to mind anyway. 7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? I think most of my fics end up with happy endings or at the very least open hopeful endings.

8. Do you get hate on fics? I wouldn't call it hate... but I did once get a couple of people debating in my comment section that Lily couldn't be friends with Sirius before dating James because it would be "taking away from jily's relationship"

9. Do you write smut. If so what kind? I don't really understand the second half of the question, but yes I do write smut.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? Nope

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? I don't know if stolen is the right term, but there was a period years ago where some on my one-shots kept being posted on Instagram. Sometimes with credit, others not. 12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Not that I'm aware of.

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before? Yes! and I would love to do it again. I did Stripped Back to Basics with @athenasparrow and june jilychallenge Ice Breaker with @jamesunderwater

14. What's your all-time favourite ship? This will surprise no one, jily. 15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? Previously I would have said the fic I started over a decade ago... but I am actively trying to finish it and it is one of my publishing WIPs (we're gonna ignore the fact it's in desperate need of an update). It is currently publishing under a new name tho: Wake Me Up (When September Ends)

16. What are your writing strengths? I manage to sprinkle a little humour into most of my fics.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Sticking to an update schedule... even though I always start with the best of intentions.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? I don't think I've ever done it but I can barely English to be fair. I don't mind it in other peoples fics.

19. First fandom you wrote for? HP

20. Favourite fic you've ever written? I answered this as Stripped Back To Basics yesterday... I'm struggling to like my writing at the moment. But I enjoyed this first ever collaborative project and now Athena is a much beloved friend. tagging (and apologising if you've already been tagged): @merlins-sequined-hotpants, @uncertainwallflower, @practicecourts, @abihastastybeans

[bratshaws]

goodness gracious. 89 brb x oc

a/n: I was going to post this ahead but.....I had an anxious day, lol, and this was the only thing that helped me.

check out the fic's playlist made by the sweet @wiipes !!

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: fluff, are you ready for some tears?

chapters:

1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18/19/20/21/22/23/24/25/26/27/28/29/30/31/32/33/34/35/36/37/38/39/40/41/42/43/44

45/46/47/48/49/50/51/52/53/54/55/56/57/58/59/60/61/62/63/64

65/66/67/68/69/70/71/72/73/74/75/76/77/78/79/80/81/82/83/84

85/86/87/88

(pls let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!!)

taglist: @mirandastuckinthe80s @roosterschanelslut @wiipes @lcahwriter @shrimping-for-all @gretagerwigsmuse @frenchtoastix

@lizzie-rdj @fanboyluvr @atarmychick007 @comebacktoearthpls

@peachiicherries @mak-32 @lizziespidiepridie @roosterswifey @ollyoxenfrees @piceous21 @sqrlgrl22 @hofficoffi @lexhalstead3a @lorilane33 @legendarydreamersharkparty @luckyladycreator2

@emilybradshaw @j-6o @louisahale @leobabbyyy @kulicny @winter-run @ktjmac @graciereads @bigpoppajes

-

The months were going by fast, so fast that Beatrice couldn’t even believe it. It was the fifth month already and he was going to come back the very next!! She was so happy, yes there was still a long time for him to return but it’d go by fast, she was sure of it! 

These past months were complicated, at first, but she managed it. She admitted some things to herself too, things she didn’t want to admit before but now couldn’t deny. It was a big step that she was more than ready to take honestly and hopefully so was he. 

They’ve been talking whenever they could, which wasn’t that often but he always replied to her messages when she sent them - especially the ones  with the pictures she took when Michael was gone and she had the house all to herself. But since it was June, he promised her he’d try and video chat on his birthday and Beatrice had something planned. 

It was silly but she bought him a cake, he wouldn’t be able to eat it, obviously, but it’s the gesture that matters. She also decorated the kitchen with a Happy Birthday sign ,bought Jolene a little birthday hat - that the pittie wasn’t sure if she liked, considering she stood still when Beatrice put it on her head - and had some balloons floating around the kitchen just to add to the atmosphere.

Beatrice knew he’d be online a couple hours before she leaves for the Hard Deck and that he probably wouldn’t be able to talk for too long but it’d be more than fine. She could do that. 

She sat in front of the laptop with her hands on her lap, smiling while waiting for him to show up. Oh she was so excited, she wished he was there to celebrate it with her and their friends, but since he wasn’t she wanted to make it as special as she could. Her leg was bouncing with nerves, waiting for the connection to finally happen, biting her lower lip at the loading screen, shining and dimming the light of her laptop screen.

Beatrice waits a little while longer, getting up to grab some water - it was June already so summer came in full blast- and fixing the spaghetti strap on her top as it rolled down her shoulder to her arm, running her fingers through the strands of hair that framed her face and fell from her high bun, a soft happy gasp breaking past her lips when she saw the connection established.

The transmission was a lot smoother from other times they chatted, his face appeared in high definition almost, “Hi!” she smiles, noticing he was no longer at the little room he used to stay in when they chatted, “Oh, did you change rooms?”

Rooster back over his shoulder then to her, “Yeah, the old room was getting too crowded so we moved here.” he smirks “Hi,gorgeous. How are you today?”

“I’m really okay, kinda stuffy because it hasn’t rained in…I think two weeks so everything is sticky and annoying.” she says, “But what about you? How are you doing?”

“I’m doing fine,I’m going to have a meeting in a couple hours.”

“Oh?”

“It’s nothing serious, gorgeous, just something I gotta do.” he replies with a grin, folding his arms over the table, “You look really good though.”

Beatrice laughs softly, looking down at her outfit of spaghetti strap top and soft cotton shorts with her cheeks reddening, “Thank you, you don’t look too bad yourself.” she grins,”Oh! Hold on– Jojo, come here!” she disappears from his view for a second, he hears her grunt offscreen and then return with Jolene in her arms, the pittie’s tail wagging when she sees Bradley’s face.

The pilot notices the birthday hat on her head and laughs, leaning closer to have a better look. Jolene whined happily, her whole body shaking the longer she looked at him, “You gave her a birthday hat. Oh my God, that’s adorable.”

“Isn’t it? I thought it’d be cool, but there’s more!” she leaned out of frame again to show the balloons and the Happy Birthday sign hanging above the cabinets. His smile softened, just like his gaze, his heart fluttering inside his chest the more he looked, “I know you can’t celebrate it here, so I just thought you’d like to see it. I even got you a cake!”

“A cake? Bea, you didn’t have to.”

“I know,I just…thought it’d be nice.” she replies after setting Jolene on the floor, “And I told you we’d celebrate in a different way, so.” she ends her sentence with a shrug, pulling one of her knees up so she could prop her chin on it, holding the leg in that position by crossing her arms in front of it, “How are you holding up?.”

Bradley drops his head with a gentle laugh, “I’m going through it. Can’t wait to get back home.” Home. With her. “But the mission is going well, everything is running smoothly so I can’t really complain.”

“Of course, that’s the most important thing.” Beatrice hears her phone buzzing on the corner of the table but doesn’t reach for it, she just turns it face down. Normally she wouldn’t mind it, but she missed Brad way too much and she knew if it was really important they’d call again. Right now her focus was on Rooster, “I miss you.”

“I miss you too, gorgeous.” he replies softly, his smile widening, “We need to make up for the lost time when I come back.”

Beatrice chuckles, still holding her chin up with her knee, her cheeks turning a light red, “I’m sure we can arrange something, lieutenant.” Bradley’s eyes hardened just enough for her to know it was effective, which always was to be honest, “We’ll have to do a lot of things when you get back.”

His eyes dropped from her face to her cleavage, that appeared fuller because of her knee touching it, licking his lips before she spoke “Kinda wish it was right now, to be honest with you.”

“It’s just a few more days, Brad.” she says, “You’ll be here before you know it.”

There’s a pause on his side and she thinks it’s the connection’s fault, but he smirks and then nods, tilting his head to the side “True.”

Her buzzes again and she frowns, “Sorry Roos,” she picks it up and holds it for him to see, “I need to see who it is.” she wasn’t surprised it was Shells, but she was surprised that they had to clean the bar later that night because the raccoons attacked again and just dragged so much stuff to the beach they’d have to clean everything before tomorrow. Beatrice sighs,typing back a response and putting the phone aside.

“Something wrong, gorgeous?”

“No, just gotta go to the bar later tonight to help clean, the raccoons are going insane. They stopped for a while but every now and again they show up and make a mess…the first time they go to the beach though.”

“Maybe they want to catch some waves.” he jokes and she couldn’t help the soft chortle that makes its way out of her lips. She sees him looking somewhere over his own screen, his brows turning in a frown “Damn, baby,I gotta go.”

Beatrice tries to not be disappointed, putting on a happy face for him, “Okay. I’ll talk to you before you come back?”

“You know it, gorgeous.” he says, winking at her and pushing himself to his feet, but not before he waves to her, “Bye baby,I love you.”

“I love you too.” and the screen goes black. Beatrice stays on the chair for a little while longer, sighing quietly and then looking back at Jolene - whose birthday hat was now under her chin giving her a shiny pink pointy beard. She gently removes the hat from her dog, kissing the top of her head and thanking the pitbull for doing that with her. 

Now that she was once again surrounded by silence, Beatrice just watched her reflection on the dark screen and pouted her lower lip, ‘...he’ll be back soon,I can wait for him.” she tells herself, pushing herself up to her feet so she could put the empty glass on the sink. Seemed crazy but they were going to have their one year anniversary next month.

One whole year, it’s crazy.

She hopes he’ll be here to celebrate it though. She’d like it a whole lot.

-

When she gets to the Hard Deck, the parking lot is empty saved up by Shells’ car, which was normal since it was a Monday and the bar didn’t open on Mondays. What was strange was how some of the lights were off, Beatrice wondered if the raccoons actually did something with the electricity and it was worse than she thought.

Bea didn’t even manage to open the door before Shells’ yanks it open, “Finally!Oh my God, Bea.” the brunette doesn’t even say hello, blinking in surprise as her friend pushes her inside. “Come on in, come on in. Oh it’s a mess!”

Beatrice’s green eyes move all around the bar, furrowing her brows because…it doesn’t seem that messy in there, “Penny and I already cleaned a good chunk, but oof, the beach? Yeah, it needs three people, here gimme your bag.” she feels the weight leave her shoulder before she could stop it, looking back at Shells’ blonde head disappearing into the employee’s room.

Penny steps back from the beach and once she meets Beatrice’s eyes she sighs in relief, “Oh, Bea, thank God.”

“Is it that bad?”

“It goes down all the way where the guys play football.” she explains, propping her hands on her hips and shaking her head, “Those raccoons,I swear, I need to deal with them soon.” she then looks back to where Shells was, “Tell you what, why don’t you go ahead? We left everything there and we’ll just close the bar’s doors so no one enters while we are away.”

Beatrice nods quickly, “Of course Penny!” she says, glad she wore a clean pair of sneakers that night, pulling her hair up in a ponytail and fixing her Metallica shirt over her shorts, “Will you guys take long?”

“No, no,I just need to make sure we don't forget anything.” Penny offers Beatrice a small smile and then moves her hand for her to go ahead before disappearing back into the employee’s room. Beatrice could be wrong, but she could swear she heard more than the two in there…maybe she was imagining things.

She walks out of the bar, past the seating area and looks up at the sky that was now completely dark blue tinkling with stars, not a single cloud to cover them with the full moon round and illuminating the shore, giving it a light blue color. Beatrice wonders what she’s going to find, honestly it’s a bit hard to imagine the raccoons taking the trash so far away, but something would have scared them.

A bear, maybe? There are bears roaming around San Diego but they’ve never even approached this area before. 

Beatrice was so into her head trying to think of reasons why it happened, she almost missed the tiny light in the sand. She stops, seeing the glowing dot in the distance and analyzes it for a few seconds before she decides to move again, stepping closer and closer until she sees what it was.

It was a tiny candle. Those flat battery powered ones, deep in the sand…that…is weird. She looks back over her shoulder to see if Shells and Penny were coming, but there was no sign of them. When she looks ahead she sees another candle a few feet away, so she gets closer to it only to see a few more forming almost like a line guiding her away from the bar.

“What the hell?” she asks quietly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear when the wind made it drop from her ponytail before it hits her in the eye. She’s confused…wait was she on the wrong side of the beach? But this was usually the area where the guys would play football, then what was going on? The more she walked, the more tiny candles she could see until she reached an area where the candles no longer formed a line, but a circle.

Now she was extremely confused, furrowing her eyebrows and looking around, trying to find anyone. By the time she looks back ahead, her eyes widen and her mouth parts in a gasp. At first, she thought it was a trick of her eyes, maybe she’s seeing things - she’s hearing things, why wouldn’t she see them? - because she desires it so much.

Because, for all that was Holy, Bradley was right in the center of that light circle. Wearing all white with his hands clasped behind his back. Beatrice doesn’t move, in fact she’s not even sure she’s breathing, “...Brad?” she asks quietly, slowly getting closer. His figure gets sharper and solid, she could see the creases on his white jacket and she could smell his cologne.

If this was just a figment of her imagination, she had to check. Not-So-Sure-He-Was-Real Bradley opens his mouth to speak, but stops when she puts her palm in the middle of his chest, then the other one, then drags them all the way up to his face. The second her hand comes in contact with his cheeks, she pulls them back as if she was electrocuted, giving a few steps back in surprise, “Brad?” She repeats and the Not-So-Sure-He-Was-Real Bradley turns into Oh-My-God-He-Is-Real Bradley in a matter of seconds.

“Hi gorgeous.”

Beatrice screams in surprise, then lunges at him with her arms immediately wrapping around his neck and his own around her waist, keeping her up in the air as her legs kick back and forth. She didn’t know how to react, she was crying and laughing and thanking every deity that existed, pulling back to kiss him over and over, cupping his cheeks with both of her hands and laughing against his mouth, “You are here.” she whispers on his lips, her glassy eyes shining under the moonlight and the tiny candles. “I thought–you said you were coming back next month.”

Bradley smiles, placing her down back on the sand gently and kissing the top of her head, “I might’ve…” he shrugs, “Added a little white lie.”

“...you–what?”

Rooster sighs, then licks his lips, “I wasn’t going to stay there for six months, baby. I…had to say it because of what I was planning to do.”Oh he was going to surprise her on his birthday! Of course! But when she says that to him he just laughs again, then shakes his head, “Well..sort of. It’s…well…” he clears his throat, rubs his hands together and looks behind her for a second then returns his gaze to her green irises, “It’s…whew this is harder than I thought?”

Beatrice’s smile falters and she furrows her brows, “You…said you had a meeting to go to.”

“I did have one.” he clears his throat again, “As soon as I left the base,I…really didn’t even change it.”he chuckles, gesturing to his white uniform, “It was a very important meeting.”

-

He was sweating, he was sweating and he was trying really hard to not chicken out before the time. This was immensely risky, but it was Pete who assured him he should try. So, once he reaches the colorful glass door he stops and leans his hands on his knees, inhaling and exhaling quickly before he straightens himself, “Okay.” he bounces on the porch, hearing the dogs’ nails clicking behind the door, “Okay,I can do it.”

He knocks on the door and waits with his cap under his arm, and to him it’s like it takes an eternity for the door to open. He heaves out a sigh of relief once it does reveal Beatrice’s mother, “Bradley! Hello!” the woman immediately hugs him, pulling back to look at him from top to bottom with confusion, “Why, were you just at the base, bambino?”

“Ah yes, is um,” he clears his throat, trying to swallow the nerves, “Is Rafael home?”

“Yes!Yes he is! He’s in his office, come on in, do you want some coffee, bambino?” he just nods because that’s all he can do. The pitbulls greet him at the door, where he gently pets them before he walks into the house. Every sound of his shoes hitting the floor is louder than he thought, Claudia’s voice alongside the pitbulls rushing around just fade into the background when he nears Rafael’s office.

It’s like slow motion.

But worse.

He feels a bit sick.

Bradley stands at the door frame, seeing Rafael’s back as he messes with his piano. The older man looks up from what he was doing and smiles, pulling off his glasses, “Bradley! What a surprise!” Beatrice’s father claps the pilot on the shoulder “What brings you here?”

Rooster licks his dry lips, then sets his cap on one of the many bookshelves her father had in this room, then he…doesn’t know what to do with his hands so he grabs the cap again and returns it to its place under his arm, clenching the black rim, “I…I would like your permission.” Rafael’s posture straightens, “To ask Beatrice’s hand in marriage.”

There’s a loud crash outside the office, followed by the dogs’ startled yelp that makes both men look back at the door, “Amore?” Rafael asks “Are you okay?” 

Claudia doesn’t respond, she just shows up at the door with her eyes glistening with tears and her hands tented in front of her lips, “Dio mio, Bradley, I–” she starts fanning herself, “Dio santissimo oh I need to-to clean this…do not come outside! Th-There’s ceramic and hot coffee all over the floor!”

Her mother wanders off still looking shocked, but they could hear her whispering to herself and gently crying once she walks away. Rooster hoped it was a good reaction. When he faces Rafael again, the older man has a knowing smile on his face under that thick beard of his “So, you want my permission.”

“Yes.”

Rafael lips purse when he nods, “And…you have a ring?”

“I do.” It took some time, and a lot of help from Penny, to pull it off. He grabs the velvet box from his pocket and opens it for Rafael to see. His future father in law looks down at the ring, his own eyes widening in recognition and he couldn’t help but look back at Bradley in surprise. Rafael’s own eyes shine with unshed tears, and he tells Bradley he can close the box, “I know you might think it’s too soon but–”

“It does not matter, Bradley.” Rafael’s own voice sounds a bit choked up, wiping under his eye so he can remove the tear that dared to fall, “She loves you and you love her and…time isn’t going to prevent it from happening. Of course you have my permission, ragazzo.” he says, wrapping his arms around Rooster’s shoulders and engulfing him into a hug. The younger pilot clenches his eyes in relief, hugging Rafael just as tightly. The older man claps his upper back twice and pulls back, giving the pilot a teary smile, “When are you proposing?”

“Tonight, actually in–” he looks down at his watch “A few minutes, hopefully.” he felt so much lighter and his stomach was no longer in knots anymore, “...thank you.” 

Rafael just shakes his head with a chuckle, “Do not thank me, I thank you, for making my tesoro so happy.” he was about to say more but Claudia’s crying gets louder when she appears back on the doorway. She has fat tears rolling down her face and is trying so hard to stop them by fanning herself.

“Oooh, my God.” her voice is shaky and cracking, “Ohh Dio Mio.” she doesn’t even stop herself, she just hugs Bradley like her husband did,pulling back to cup his cheeks and kiss his forehead, “You,” a sniffle, “You are a wonderful boy and I…am so honored you are asking us this, Bradley.”

“Thank you ma’am.” he smiles back, “I really want to make Beatrice happy.”

Claudia just tilts her head and smiles, “You already do.”

-

“...oh.” Beatrice says, he hasn’t elaborated why the meeting was so important, “Well but if that’s the case then why– what are you doing?” she immediately stops talking when she sees him going down on one knee, “Why are you on your knee?”

“Bea.” he reaches for her hand, grabbing with his own as the other comes up to cover her mouth, “Baby.”

“You are joking, what are you doing??!!” 

Bradley just takes in a deep breath, “You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” he begins, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles, “And I can’t imagine my life without you. Baby, baby look at me.” Beatrice is looking anywhere but at him, “Bea, angel, look at me.” the waterworks are already flowing down her face when she meets his eyes again, “Beatrice Schiavoni–”

“Brad–”

“Will you,” her eyes widen, about to pop out of the sockets when she sees him pulling out the red velvet box from inside his pants pocket, “Give me the honor to call you my wife?” When he pops the box open it takes a few minutes for her to see what it was…but once she does she immediately drops to her knees in front of him. It was obviously a ring…but it was very similar to her nonna’s engagement ring. Except the gems were smaller and the band thinner, in white gold instead of the usual yellow.

Beatrice is now on her knees, both of her hands cupping her mouth as she breathes in and out heavily, sobbing quietly as she looks at it. He was proposing, Bradley was proposing to her when she didn’t even talk to him about getting married yet, he was…he wanted to marry her, he wanted to marry her. Beatrice barely sees his face anymore because of the tears in her eyes, he’s a blob of white but she hiccups, “Y-Yes.”

“Yes? Is that a yes?”

“I-It’s always a yes.” she manages to blurt out, holding up her shaky left hand and trying her best to calm herself down. The ring slides down her finger until it reaches the base and Beatrice feels another wave of tears crashing down on her, holding her hand closer to her eyes to have a better look only to give it up because she was still crying too much to see. She whimpers quietly, trying to wipe her eyes the best she could, “I look a-a mess,”

“You look beautiful,” he replies, his voice lighter, “You always do.”

Beatrice couldn’t stop the teary laugh that make its way out of her mouth, sniffling and looking down at her ring one more time before she sees Rooster’s face more clearly. His own eyes are shining and he’s grinning back at her with his position still the same, “You want to marry me.”

“I do.”

She couldn’t help the next sob that comes out, pushing herself to her feet and then launching her body on his so she tackles him to the soft sand, laughing and crying on his shoulder and kissing his lips over and over as they both lay on the sand like that. “I love you.” she whispers on his mouth, “I love you so much.”

“I love you too,Bea. I really do.” he says back, the two chuckling like teenagers with their foreheads touching.

“Did she say yes yet?!”

Shells’ voice from the distance breaks the moment, making the two turn their heads to the voice. Beatrice’s mouth drops open when she sees not only Shells but the whole Dagger Squad standing there with their phones up and not so far from them either. “She did!” he shouts back, “We aren’t just rolling on the sand for nothing!”

“Thank God!”

“Wait, what–” Realization hits, “Oh my God!!”

“I’m sorry baby, they were all on it too.” Bradley offers an apologetic shrug that wasn’t apologetic at all, “It was hard keeping some people’s mouths shut, but it was worth it.” Beatrice looks down at him with surprise written all over her face, but she starts laughing, pushing herself off his chest so he could sit up. She gently brushes the sand off his hair and coat, with the hand that had her ring.

The ring he proposed to her with. 

Beatrice just looked down at it again, still trying to wrap her mind around it, then looks up when she sees he’s already on his feet, offering his hand for her to take. She does, he pulls her up and he hugs her to his side, dropping a kiss to her head as the two wander back to the Hard Deck where the cheering was louder than the Fourth of July.

[cardcaptorsakura96]

Taxes, Taxes, Taxes-Chapter 28

Fandom: Supergirl

Characters: Kara Danvers, Clark Kent, Samantha Arias, Lena Luthor, Lillian Luthor, Ruby Arias, Oliver Queen, John Stewart, Diana Prince, Bruce Wayne, Barry Allen, J'onn J'onnz, Alfred Pennyworth, Lois Lane, Cat Grant, Lucy Lane, Damian Wayne, Felicity Smoak, Streaky the Supercat, Martha Kent, Selina Kyle, Talia Al Ghul, Lucius Fox, Maggie Sawyer, Alex Danvers, Jason Todd, Otis Graves, Lex Luthor

Summary: What if superheroes had to pay a property damage tax every time they had a fight in the city?

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13, Chapter 14, Chapter 15, Chapter 16, Chapter 17, Chapter 18, Chapter 19, Chapter 20, Chapter 21, Chapter 22, Chapter 23, Chapter 24, Chapter 25, Chapter 26, Chapter 27

Lena smiled and leaned back into her chair at the Children’s Hospital. She closed the laptop on her desk. 

“I’m finally finished for the day,” said Lena softly. 

Today had been very productive for Lena. Ever since the commercial, business at the hospital has been booming. More doctors from across the country wanted to work with them and more importantly, they have received a massive influx of patients. It meant more paperwork, but it was a nice problem to have. Lena smiled while rubbing the back of her neck. 

I am finally able to help people.

As she stretched,  she heard a knock on her office door. 

“Come in,” said Lena.

Sam poked her head through, breath a sigh of relief, and said, “Good, you are still here.”

Lena frowned and asked, “There isn’t more paperwork, is there? I was hoping to actually be able to leave early for once.”

Sam smirked and said, “Eager to get to your girlfriend I see.”

Lena pouted and said, “Well, yeah, I haven’t seen her all day and I want to cuddle alright.”

Sam cackled and said, “I won’t delay your cuddle time with Kara. Ruby’s school just called to confirm if you and Kara are still attending the Flash’s STEM forum tomorrow.”

Lena smiled and said, “Yes, Kara texted me saying she is still coming.”

Sam smiled and said, “That is good. I will let the school know. It is so awesome that the Flash has been setting up these forums to try to get young girls into STEM fields.”

Lena nodded and said, “I wished we had something like this when I was younger. There are not many of us in the fields of math, tech, science, or engineering. I really do believe that if girls knew about these subjects at an early age, that they would be more engaged.”

Sam nodded and said, “The girls at Ruby's school have been talking about it nonstop. Granted they are more excited that the Flash is coming. Kind of surprised that Kara is going in her civilian attire though.”

Lena looked up thoughtfully and said, “She did think about going as Supergirl, but figured it was too risky in case someone linked the degree back to her civilian identity.”

Sam looked at Lena curiously and said, “I thought that she got her degree from Krypton though. Would that even apply here?”

Lena nodded and said, “Before Kara started crime fighting here, she did get her Maters’s in Mathematics from National City University.”

“Why?”

Lena mused, “To have a backup plan. With crime fighting, there is always the chance that things could go wrong or maybe she decides she had enough with that life. She wanted something just in case this or the journalism career she just started didn’t pan out.”

Sam smirked and said, “She is sexy, heroic, and smart. You definitely hit the jackpot. Does she have some friends that she could maybe introduce me to?”

Lena raised an eyebrow and said “I thought you didn’t do relationships anymore. I remember you saying it was better to hit it and quit it.”

Sam chuckled and said, “I don’t remember being that crass.”

Lena smirked and said, “I paraphrased. What you said was much more vulgar than that.”

Sam cackled and said, “Maybe I was. That’s beside the point.”

Lena raised an eyebrow and asked, “Which is?”

Sam chuckled softly and said, “You and Kara have shown me that it is possible to connect with someone on a deeper level. I would like to find that for myself too someday.”

Lena smiled widely while leaning back in her chair.

“Awww, Kara and I are your inspiration. That’s so sweet.”

Sam sighed and said, “Please don’t make me take that back.”

Lena chuckled and said, “I kid. I’ll talk to Kara to see if she has some single friends that are ready to mingle.”

Sam smiled and said, “Awesome! Well, I won’t keep you from your sexy time with Kara…”

Lena chuckled, shook her head and said, “Bye Sam.”

Sam chuckled and said, “Bye Lena.”

As Sam closed the door behind her, Lena got up and stretched. She then went to a corner of her lab with her tablet and typed in a few things. A portal opened. 

Lena smiled and said, “Like always have a quick way home.”

After she steps through the portal she appears by the front door of Kara’s apartment in the house of El. Waiting to greet her was Streaky who instantly started to purr and rub against Lena’s leg. 

Lena smiled as she picked up Streaky and said, “It is nice to see you too.” She started to scratch Streaky behind the ears which caused him to purr more. Lena cuddled with him, looked around and said, “Let’s see if we can find your mommy.”

She walked a bit from the front part of the apartment when she noticed rose petals. Lena smiled as she followed the rose petals until she got to the kitchen. She was pleasantly surprised to see a candle lit table of food with a bottle of wine and wine glasses. 

Lena suddenly felt arms embrace her from behind and a kiss on her left cheek. She looked up to see Kara's smiling face. 

Read the rest on AO3

[hide-in-imagination]

"Roads That Cross... With Memories"

You can read the previous chapters here: (1),(2), (3), (4), (5), (6), (7), (8), (9), (10), (11), (12), (13), (14), (15), (16), (17), (18), (19), (20), (21), (22), (23), (24), (25), (26)

--------------------------------

Happy early Christmas, everybody! ♡

--------------------------------

In the blink of an eye, three whole days had passed since the return of Juliana. The Roller was lively, the music and the colors seeming more vibrant now that everything was back to how it used to be. Well, not everything, but as Nina’s fingers flew around the keyboard, the familiar sound of typing joining the cheery voices of her friends, she contemplated that things were always changing, nothing ever stayed the same forever, and that was okay because it allowed growth. 

Luna wasn’t the same now that she knew who she truly was, but she’d gained more family and the ability to finally let go of the wondering and the empty space. Nico was no longer there, but he’d left for New York chasing his dreams. Nina herself would soon be graduating high school and doing God knows what. Something related to writing, for sure. She had some ideas, but it was still hard to imagine that by this time next year she’d be at university. Her life, and everyone’s lives, were going to change so much, and in ways only the future could tell.  

All of this she wrote on her laptop— Her musings about time and how fast it went by. Permanence. Change. Future. Her mind was full of these things because time, slowly and tortuously, had snuck up on her.

Gastón would be flying back to England tomorrow. 

Nina’s fingers stumbled and stopped their typing. Procrastinating writing philosophical thoughts was probably not a good idea. It helped her think though, and think she had, all these days, exhaustively. She didn’t think she’d thought this much about Gastón since when she was first crushing on him years ago. 

She also thought a lot about herself. About what she wanted. 

She thought of Eric too. 

She even thought of Xavi, sweet Xavi, and of a hundred hypothetical guys she could maybe meet in the future. 

Future. Past. Possibilities. Fears. Wishes. 

In the end, even if she rationalized everything and tried to find the right answer like in the question of a test, what really mattered were her feelings. 

There was no ‘right’ answer because no one knew what would happen— She could only decide on what she wanted. 

And she did.

Taking a deep breath, Nina grabbed her phone to follow through on what she had set out to do this morning. She tapped her screen, going through different chats until she found his contact. 

N: Can we talk this afternoon?

N: I have my answer.

*************************

Keen eyes looked through documents; checking, evaluating. 

“Okay, as far as I see it, everything’s in order.” Ana smiled. “This event is going to be great.” 

Ámbar placed a hand on her chest and sighed in relief. “Thank you so much, Ana.” She received the papers from her and tucked them in the folder. “I want this to be the best Roller Jam ever. You’re invited, by the way.” 

Ana laughed lightly. “Thank you, I’d love to come.” She put her phone and pen back into her purse and began to stand. “I’ll get going now, I have a hearing in a couple of hours.” 

“Yeah— Oh! Ana! Before I forget.” Ana stopped to hear her. “Could you contact that accountant friend you told me about and see if they can come here one of these days?” Ámbar asked. “Because with the Open Music I could somehow manage, but this event is bigger and there’ll be a lot more things to consider, I could really use their help.” 

“Of course,” Ana said with a smile. “I’ll call her later and ask her, but I don’t think she’ll have any problem.” 

“Awesome. Thank you so much, Ana,” Ámbar said for maybe the fifth time that day, but she was truly a godsend. “I really don’t know what I’d do without you.” 

“You’re completely welcomed.” Ana waved as she walked away. “See you later, Ámbar.” 

“See you!” 

Ámbar grabbed her notepad and scratched ‘Check the documents with Ana’ out of her To-do list. The preparations for the Roller Jam had been going smoothly thus far. She had shown Simón some reference pics she’d found on the internet of Día de los Muertos decorations and he’d helped her pick what would work best for the event. The budget was approved by Vidia and she had almost all planned out. To be honest, she thought she could have this done in a matter of days if it were only the Roller Jam she had to worry about, like back when she did the Flash Open, but now she had her everyday manager responsibilities on top of it, which left her very little time to work on the event. 

She’d thought of just doing it in her free time, but Simón quickly advised her against it. ‘If they’re not paying you for pulling extra hours, don’t do them; it’s not worth it. I learned that years ago.’ Sometimes she forgot that he had so much work experience. She felt sorry for him for having felt the need to start working so young, but she also admired him a lot for it. He knew so many things that she didn’t, like something as crucial to life as cooking a meal, and he always gave his best at everything he did. She hoped that he could live his dream soon. He was a great musician and he deserved to be recognized for it, he deserved to give his best at what he really wanted to do. 

And then… what about her? 

Ámbar paused with her pen in hand. It wasn’t like being the manager of the Roller was her life dream. After this job was over… what would she do with her life? What did she want to do? 

She spent some minutes looking at the document in front of her, pretending to read it while actually contemplating life. 

A presence came up to her table.

“Hey, Ámbar.” 

Ámbar looked up, snapping out of her thoughts. She was immediately surprised. This was unexpected. 

“Can I talk to you?” Matteo asked her, hesitant, probably because he also knew how unusual this was. “As in, in private?”  

Ámbar’s brows drew together a little. “Uh… Sure.” It was a strange request but she saw no reason to say no. It wasn’t like she was being very productive at the moment. 

She stood from her seat and Matteo walked towards the dressing room, so she followed him there. Once inside, she closed the door behind her. “What’s up?” 

“Well, first of all, I wanted to say that I really like your Día de los Muertos idea for a Roller Jam,” Matteo said. “We were all worried, to be honest, when you first became the Roller’s manager, but I gotta admit, you’ve come up with very good things since then, and I think you deserve some credit.” 

Ámbar blinked. Okay… had she entered some alternate dimension without her knowing or something? Why was Matteo telling her this? “Wow, um, thank you…? I’m doing my best to be the best manager I can be,” she said. 

“Of course, of course. And the best girlfriend you can be too,” Matteo added, this time jokingly. “Should I be offended that you never threw an Italian party for me while we were dating? Nor did you do it for Benicio. Now that I think about it—Do you know if Simón has any Italian heritage? Maybe you have a type.”

She liked him better when he was being formal and appreciative. 

“I’m trying to forget I ever dated you, and Benicio was nothing more than a momentary lapse of judgment,” she said coolly. “Now, is there a point to this conversation?”

Matteo looked nervous again. “Right. Yes. I, um… I wanted to ask you for a favor.” 

Of course. “And what would that be?”  

“Would it be possible for me to perform a song at the Roller Jam?” 

Ámbar frowned a little. “Um… I mean, Simón and Luna are gonna sing one, but you’re not from México, Matteo. Why do you wanna sing? To promote your new song?”  

Matteo averted his gaze, hesitant. “I’m not from México…” He said slowly, “…but Luna is.”

Ámbar’s brows shot to her hairline and her jaw dropped. 

“I wanna do a surprise for her,” Matteo said fast while she snorted in disbelief, “so if you could also not tell anyone that I’ll be singing, that’d be great. It’d only be one song—” 

“You do realize that you’re asking me, your ex, to do a surprise for the girl you dumped me for.” 

“I broke up with you for many reasons; only one of them was Luna. And you broke up with me too— And,” he added quickly before she could refute, “didn’t you just say that you wanted to forget we ever happened?” 

She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, whatever.” 

Matteo looked away and tucked his hands in the pocket of his pants. “For what is worth… I’m sorry for how I acted during our relationship. I know I wasn’t the best boyfriend, especially the Luna thing… Though, in my defense, Gastón was the one who dared me to make her fall for me.” 

“Gastón did what?” And he had the audacity to act all goody-goody? “Oooh, I hope Nina doesn’t forgive him,” she spat. It was common knowledge to everyone with eyes that Gastón was hoping for something with Nina judging by the longing stares he sent her 24/7. After this? Ámbar was tempted to introduce her to another guy herself. 

“Hey, I was the one who listened to him.” 

“I know,” she told him with a glare; he wasn’t even subtle about it. 

A flash of shame passed across Matteo’s face much to Ámbar’s satisfaction. Good. Now they could lay this whole thing to rest. “Thank you for the apology,” she said in a kinder tone. “You’re two years late, but I guess it’s better than never.” 

“Well, with the way you were acting, I didn’t feel much like apologizing to you.” 

She glared at him again. Fair. Didn’t mean she had to admit it. 

“You’re still asking me for a favor, remember?” She said. That shut him up. “And I was not the only one insufferable— In fact…” She crossed her arms in front of her chest. “What about Simón?” 

Matteo frowned. “What about him?” 

“Well, you were unfaithful to me, but you antagonized him for two years straight, including when you publicly humiliated him in that Vidia interview. Did you apologize to him?” She asked with indignation.

Matteo stared at her for a moment with a silly face. “Wow. Who would’ve thought you’d ever get this defensive over someone other than yourself.” 

“Matteo.” 

He sighed, getting back to the point. “I tried, some time ago. He didn’t let me. He told me to forget about it, that it was all in the past. That I’m a different person now and he is happy we’re friends.” 

Ámbar deflated and face-palmed. “Of course, he did.” She looked to the side with mild annoyance. “I can’t believe I’ll have to get angry in his stead for the rest of my life.” 

“Or… you could learn from him and don’t hold grudges,” Matteo suggested. 

Ámbar looked at him like he was insane. “Do you even know me at all?” She extended her hand in greeting. “Hi, Ámbar Smith, we dated for years, do you recall?”  

Matteo laughed slightly, and for a moment it looked like that would be all— they’d buried the hatched, finally. But then his face clouded with worry. “You’re treating him right, right?” 

For the second time in this conversation, Ámbar’s jaw dropped to the underworld. “Oh my god, I can not believe this— Another couple’s counselor!” She threw her hands up. “They’re just everywhere these days!” 

Matteo frowned confusedly. “Another?” 

“I’m not gonna talk about my relationship with you Matteo,” Ámbar told him in all seriousness. 

“I just wanted to make sure—” She gave him a pointed look. “Okay, fine, I get it,” he backed off. He stared at her. “So…” 

“So?” 

“Can I perform at the Roller Jam?” 

Ah right, that. 

Ámbar narrowed her eyes, calculating. 

“You would owe me a big favor,” she started. “Immediate the moment I call it in; non-negotiable. If I decide I want you to repay me by singing ‘Pocket full of sunshine’ dressed in a bright yellow duck costume in front of the whole Roller, you do it.” 

Fear flickered in Matteo’s eyes. “…Simón wouldn’t let you do that to me.” 

Ámbar smiled. “Simón would be the first to want to see that.” 

Matteo remained quiet. 

Ámbar offered him her hand, smiling wide and devilishly. “Do we have a deal?”  

Matteo looked at her hand with clear reluctance and sighed. He shook it. “Deal. But please have mercy.” 

Oh, how she loved having power over someone. 

“I make no promises.” 

******************

As tedious as handling the lockers could be sometimes, there were occasions in which the peace and quiet could be very useful. Lately, for Simón, the downtimes in this room had been the perfect opportunity to work on new songs. 

He spun his pen around in his hand, staring down at the words he’d written on his notepad. 

Es la fuerza que golpea fuerte al corazón

La fuerza incalculable que hay en una canción

Un volcán de cosas buenas que entra en erupción 

That was it, those were all the lyrics he had for now for this song. He couldn’t even call it a song yet. It was more like a concept, but he liked it, so he’d written it down so he wouldn’t forget. They had other songs in the making with Pedro currently, more romantic ones, some fast, some slow. Those were far more developed than this, so maybe, he thought, he should be working on finishing those instead of pondering over random words that came to him, but who was he to question inspiration? Nothing would ever start if he did. 

Not like he was having much luck at coming up with anything beyond these three verses. But, well, that wasn’t unusual. 

He had the beginnings of a melody though, like a tiny spark that if he managed to fuel enough could turn into a full-blown bonfire. He started humming and left his pen on the counter. Maybe focusing on the melody first was the way to go for this one.  

Loud, sharp footsteps and voices snapped him out of his reverie and made him turn his head to the left just as a woman stormed in, followed closely by a glaringly worried Eric who looked like he’d sprinted to reach her.  

Simón remembered this woman. She had come in here with her son only 15 minutes earlier or so.

He did not remember her glaring at him like this back then. 

The woman seethed. “You.” 

Simón abandoned all thoughts of lyrics and music. 

This was not good. 

*****************

Ámbar had just sat down mere minutes ago when the commotion reached her. 

She lifted her head from her papers just in time to see a woman furiouslywalking up to her. She was pulling a little boy by the hand with her, and Simón and Eric appeared right behind them, concern on their faces. 

The woman looked middle-aged or maybe younger. She had short, dark blond hair and wore a wine-colored open cardigan over a black floral top. A mom look if she had ever seen one. She stood right in front of Ámbar’s table, her whole stance one of outrage. “You’re the manager?”

Ámbar straightened up and stood from her seat immediately. “Yes, is there a problem?”

“My son just fell down in the middle of the rink because the skates you provided had stuck wheels,” the woman fumed. She showed her the skates in question, lifting them momentarily with her free hand. “Look at him, he could’ve broken something for your negligence! How is this possible?!” 

Ámbar gave a good look to the boy next to her. He didn’t look older than eleven. The resemblance with his mother was obvious in the matching sand blond hair and features. He was wearing a Spiderman t-shirt and jean shorts, which left in plain sight his bleeding right elbow and knee. He looked like he’d been crying. 

Ámbar swallowed and stretched out her hand. “Can I see the skates?” 

The woman handed her the skates and Ámbar checked the wheels immediately, swiping them down with her right hand to make them spin. Indeed, two wheels weren’t working, one on each skate— They were completely tightened up. 

“See?” The woman said with indignation. “Who wouldn’t fall with skates like that? My son has been rollerskating since he was five years old— He never would’ve fallen if it weren’t for those things!”

Ámbar could’ve pointed out that even professionals fall sometimes in this sport, that skating of any kind comes hand in hand with falling, but she gathered it was in her best interest to not agitate this woman even more. 

She looked at Eric, who was standing by the tables in front of the stage, watching everything that was happening with a worried expression. And he was not the only one— Delfi and Jazmín were a few tables over there, not to mention at least four other customers who were listening to all of this. This was bad. 

“Eric, could you please bring the emergency kit from the dressing room? Quickly.” Seeing him following her command, Ámbar looked back at the woman. “I’m so sorry this happened,” she said, heartfelt. “You can treat his wounds here, you should have everything you need.” 

The woman only looked offended. “And you think that is enough? Look at my son!” The kid’s gaze was on the floor, looking like he wanted to be anywhere else but there as his wounds shone bright red. “I will not allow this establishment to work like this! I want restitution and I want that boy fired!” 

She pointed her finger at Simón, who was standing close to the bar. His face paled, and Ámbar’s heart jumped to her throat. “If he goes around handing defective skates, I don’t want to even imagine how many more people have gotten hurt! Do you even train your employees in this establishment?!” 

Ámbar’s heart was pounding in her chest. She’d never had to deal with a situation like this. Sure, she’d gotten many scoldings from her godmother over the years, but this was different. She was the authority figure here, she was the one that was supposed to have everything in control, she was the one who had to take responsibility and fix this because it was her job, her subordinates, her establishment. 

The woman’s attitude annoyed her. Her suggestion that the Roller as a whole sucked annoyed her. ‘Train their employees’?  No one had trained her in how to become a manager— they just threw the position onto her hands and now she had to deal with this.   

Ámbar clenched her hands, the only crack in her composure she would allow, the only outlet for her nervousness she’d concede. She had a problem at hand and she had to find a solution. Anything else could come later.

“I can assure you that measures will be taken so that something like this never happens again,” she spoke conciliatorily, with all the professionalism she could muster. “The well-being of our customers is our number one priority. As for restitution, if it’s alright with you, you and your son can order anything you want in the cafeteria, free of charge.” Eric approached her then, handing her the emergency kit she’d requested. Ámbar offered it to the woman. “Here, you can treat him while you wait for your orders.” 

The woman was still in a huff but she accepted the medical box and followed Pedro as he led them to a table on the other side of the Roller. 

Simón went to Ámbar when they were out of earshot. 

“Ámbar, I swear I don’t know how it happened,” he said, earnest, distressed. “I check the skates and do maintenance every day— Those wheels should’ve been fine.” 

“Are you certain you checked every single one of them?” She asked.

“Yes.” 

“Absolutely sure?” 

“Yes!” He repeated, slightly exasperated. Tensions were running high and she could see in his face that her not immediately believing him hurt, but she had to ask, it was her job. 

Ámbar looked at the woman on the other side of the cafeteria. She was treating the kid’s wounds. Pedro walked over, returning to the bar, probably to prepare whatever beverage or meal they had asked for. 

“Pedro,” she called him over. “Come here for a bit.” She looked to the side. “Eric, you too.” 

She rounded up the three guys in front of her.

“New policy,” she declared. “Each time you supply rental skates, you will check the wheels right at the moment you hand them out, in front of the client’s eyes. Understood?” 

They all nodded. “Yes, Ámbar.” 

“Good.” 

Eric raised his hand shyly. “Um, what will happen with the woman?” He asked with apprehension. “She told you to fire Simón, but you’re not going to do that, right?” 

Two tables over, Jazmín snorted. “She’s not gonna fire her own boyfriend.” Delfi shot her a look. “What? We were all thinking it.” 

Ámbar glanced at Simón and her heart fell at how ashamed he looked. 

She shot a glare at Jazmín but kept her voice professional. “I will do no such thing because it’d be too extreme for an isolated event in which no real harm was done.” She fumed. “That woman should be grateful I even let her order for free because his son only got a scratched elbow and knee, and nothing assures me that he wouldn’t have fallen just as bad on his own even with perfectly good skates.” 

Everyone stayed silent, subdued by the tension that permeated the air.

Ámbar sighed. “Anyway, you’re dismissed, get back to work. Pedro, once you have the total of the woman’s order, you bring the receipt to me, okay?” 

“Yes, Ámbar.” He walked away. 

She turned. “And Jazmín, please, don’t make a video out of this.” 

Jazmín pouted. “But it’s so—”

“No. It would reflect badly on the Jam & Roller. I assume you don’t want anything to happen to this place?” Jazmín looked chastised. “That’s what I thought.”

Everything else handled, she walked toward Simón, who was still standing by the bar. 

“Take the rest of the day off, okay?” She told him gently. “We’ll talk later, don’t worry.” 

Simón just nodded and walked away, his gaze not meeting hers at all. Ámbar wished she could go with him, he looked really affected by this, but she still had a situation to deal with. 

Drawing in a breath, she squared up her shoulders and got back to work.  

****************

To be honest, Gastón had all but assumed by now that her answer was no. 

He knew he should have some hope, but a big part of him had seen the calendar move forward, the day before his flight arrive, and gathered that, if he left tomorrow without Nina saying anything, wasn’t that answer enough? There was still time, yes, but he couldn’t stop the calamitous thoughts swirling through his brain, telling him that she could just not have the heart to tell him no directly and so she was just waiting for him to leave as a way to soften the blow. 

Maybe that’d be okay. He had put her in an uncomfortable position to begin with— Maybe it was fair for it to end in whichever way she found easier. 

That was what he’d been thinking until he got her texts. 

‘Can we talk this afternoon? I have my answer.’

Gastón’s heart had leaped to his throat. It still seemed to be there now, as he made his way to the park where they decided to meet, the same one where they had… where he had called things off. He couldn’t help but wonder if that meant something. 

He tried to steady himself as he walked toward their meeting place. Whatever Nina’s answer was, he had to take it, good or bad. He wished he had an inkling of what to expect. During the past few days they’d talked some, but only in passing and with their friends around. He had no idea what was going through her head, and he wished that every single glance he saw her exchange with Eric, every single word or smile, didn’t make him assume the worst, but they did.

The thing was, regardless of what Nina chose, his life would carry on the same way. He would still miss her every minute of every day. The only difference would be in the quality of that pain— It could either be bittersweet, or a dark void he’d had to pull himself out of. 

As Gastón neared the appointed spot, he saw Nina in the distance, sitting on a bench already, her hands joined together on her lap. She saw him too and stood, waiting as he approached. She was wearing a cute navy-blue dress; a cardigan and black tights for the cold. 

She looked pretty. 

She always looked pretty. 

“Hi,” she said when he reached her.  

She was smiling, even if nervously. That was a good sign, right? 

“Hi,” he said back, and ran a hand over the back of his neck. “Um, I didn’t get the time wrong, did I? Did you wait long for me?” 

Nina’s eyes widened. “Nonono, I just got here a few minutes ago,” she reassured him. “I— I was too nervous and couldn’t stay still,” she admitted, “and, by the time I realized it, I was already here.” 

He cracked a small smile. “I get the feeling.” He couldn’t blame the weather for the sweat on his palms after all. 

There was a little silence which he took the lead to break. “Um, should we sit or…?” 

Nina looked at the bench. “Um, no, like this is fine.” 

Gastón’s heart fell. That had to be a bad sign. 

“Okay,” he said either way.  

The park they were in was very frequented by high schoolers and kids in the early hours of the afternoon, but thankfully, it was almost empty this close to the evening. Gastón wouldn’t like to be seen by any bystanders right now. Was the nervous energy between them as painfully obvious as he felt it? If anyone passed by right now, could they tell his heart was crashing against his ribs?  

The lack of people made the silence between them even more evident. A silence which both of them tried to break at the same time. 

“You first,” Gastón said after the mishap. 

“Nono, you go first, it’s fine,” Nina told him.  

Gastón changed his weight from one foot to the other. “Well… Nothing, I just…” He took a breath and mustered the strength to look her in the eyes. “I just wanted to say that, whatever your decision is, I respect it. I won’t be mad or anything, it’s alright.” Eventually, it would be. 

Nina looked down, nervous. “Well, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking these past few days…” She was fidgeting with her hands. “And I think that…” Her eyes looked at his, just for a moment. Then they drifted. To his jacket, to a spot behind him. “…considering our history, the statistics and all that, the chance of us working out long distance is very low.” 

Oh.

The air seemed knocked out of his lungs. “Oh.” 

So he had hope until now. 

Gastón had seen withered plants before. He never thought he’d ever feel like one.

“Because, I mean, we already tried it once, and it didn’t work,” Nina said, more quickly. Maybe it was a new tactic; rip it off like a Band-Aid, make the pain last less. “Repeating the same factors in the same conditions and expecting a different result is not… very realistic.” 

Gastón focused on breathing through the growing lump in his throat. “Right,” he managed to say. His voice came out weaker than he would’ve liked, but at least it sounded steady. 

He wanted to scream that it wasn’t the same. That he wasn’t the same. That he knew better now. That he’d never make the mistake of letting her go again. 

He gulped. Gulped it all down. “Yeah, I suppose you’re right.” 

His head was in disarray. Now what? What was he supposed to say? He had to reassure her, probably. It’s okay, I understand, he had to say.He had to say it. He willed the words to leave his mouth. It’s okay, I understand, can we still be—? 

“But I don’t care.” 

Gastón blinked. He realized that at some point his gaze had fallen, because when he brought it back up, he found Nina’s eyes, staring directly at him. She wasn’t fidgeting, she wasn’t looking at his shoes— Her eyes were on his. 

They stayed on his. 

“I don’t care,” she said again, determined, light, with the beginning of a smile pulling on her lips. “My heart doesn’t care if it’s impossible or if it’s a one-in-a-million chance— I want to be with you.” She moved closer. “Even if it means only talking to you through the phone or seeing you in a screen, I want to be with you, Gastón. Because I love you. So much. And I need to give my heart a chance of being happy. I need to know if this could work. And… and if it doesn’t, well, I tried. We tried. But I won’t give up without having given it my all.” 

The words fell from her lips like light itself; bright, hopeful, and heartfelt. Her eyes were shining. Maybe she herself was light. 

Gastón had been wrong before. She wasn’t just pretty— She was dazzling. 

A soft smile grew on his face. “I always knew you were braver than me, Nina Simonetti.” 

He took the final step towards her and cradled her face in his hands. 

“I promise that this time I’ll give it my all too.” He stared into her eyes and her hands went to hold the back of his own. “Because if there is one thing in this world that is worth it, it’s you.” 

Nina smiled. She smiled big, with teeth and all, and her eyes were a little wet, making them shine brighter. 

Gastón could’ve stared at them forever, but there was something else more pressing. 

Nina surged to meet him when he leaned down for her lips. The wave of warmth and affection that flooded him couldn’t be put into words— There was nothing that could describe the utter joy, relief, love that filled his chest and spread through his veins at the feeling of her mouth pressing against his, soft and perfect. He had missed kissing her too much. He had missed her too much. 

Her arms wrapped around his neck and his circled her waist, holding her close. 

No more names in the sea— No more fate. They would make their own destiny, because this was something worth fighting against all odds. 

*******************

When Simón was accused, back in Cancún, of having taken money out of the register, it’d been an unpleasant moment but he didn’t worry too much because he knew it was Benicio and not him who did something wrong. 

When that customer had come to confront him that afternoon, he hadn’t known what to do. Anything he said sounded like an excuse and she didn’t stop to listen to him much either. Simón only remembered feeling this humiliated after the Vidia interview, but even then he’d had someone to blame, and the option to escape the situation. This time, he had neither. 

Simón walked straight to the mansion after Ámbar released him from work, not in the mood to do anything else. Only when he arrived did he hesitate. Usually, he always went to Ámbar’s room, but this time, he didn’t know if he should do it. He’d caused trouble for her today. A customer had yelled at her today because of him, and he couldn’t even give explanations because he didn’t think he was guilty, but he felt guilty— It was hard not to when that woman kept pointing at him and demanding he be punished for his failure. 

‘She’s not gonna fire her own boyfriend.’  

That only made him feel worse; he shouldn’t get any special treatment. 

In the end, Simón waited for Ámbar in her room anyway. She’d told him they would talk later and it seemed like a cowardly move to make her walk all the way to his guest room to find him. He took a shower to relax a bit and put on some comfortable clothing he kept in Ámbar’s room. He had like two drawers for himself now. At that moment, he didn’t know if that was nice or if it made him feel like an intruder. 

He turned on the TV but he was too anxious to really pay attention to what was happening on the screen. Mostly, it just added background noise to his worries. He turned it off immediately when Ámbar walked in two hours later. He didn’t know what to expect. He thought maybe she’d be angry at him or act awkwardly around him because of what happened, but much to his surprise, Ámbar greeted him like normal. She sat next to him on the bed’s edge and asked how he’d spent his free afternoon. He recounted what little he’d done with uncertainty still hanging over him. 

It didn’t take long for Ámbar to show that she was angry— At the customer. 

“…she ordered more food than they could eat and asked for it to be packed to go— That woman was a freaking leach,” she was currently venting, telling him how she’d spent the rest of her afternoon. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d even suspect she tightened the wheels herself. Of course, money is not an issue, but it annoys me that I have to pull money out of my own wallet for that woman.” 

Simón, who’d been listening with his gaze down, lifted his head upon hearing that. “Yours?” He said, appalled. “No, you don’t need to pay for it, I thought it’d be discounted from my salary.”

Ámbar’s brows drew together. “That wouldn’t be fair, you didn’t do anything.” 

Simón scoffed weakly. “Exactly.” 

She held his hands and looked at him earnestly. “No, seriously, my love, I know it wasn’t you. Or any of the guys.”

It was Simón’s turn to frown. “How do you know that?” Had any new information come to light after he was gone? 

Ámbar let go of his hands and sighed, looking away from him. Her face looked glum suddenly, like whatever her answer was was not something she wanted to say. “You hadn’t arrived in Buenos Aires yet,” she started, “but did Luna ever tell you that she fell during her test to be the rink assistant because the skates they gave her were defective?” 

Simón felt like he was stuck in a state of confusion by this point. He hadn’t expected the conversation to go this way. He tried to remember. “…Yeah, now that you mention it, I vaguely recall that.”

“Well…” Ámbar brought her hand together on her lap. “The reason why that skate had a stuck wheel was that I tightened it in secret right before her test.”  

His face must have shown his utter bafflement because Ámbar turned to face him quickly, making placating gestures with her hands. “I know, I know, it was wrong, she could’ve broken something— I just really hated her at the time. I lowkey hoped she broke something.” 

“Ámbar!” 

“I’m sorry, okay?” She said painfully. “I can’t change what I did, but I promise I won’t do anything like that again. Not to her, not to anyone.” 

Simón schooled his aghast expression, although he was still reeling from her admission, but he could see the earnest look in her eyes and he believed her. 

“Anyway, that experience shows me that it’s actually very possible for someone to sneak into the lockers, tinkle with some skates, and leave with no one being the wiser.” 

“You’re saying that’s what happened now?” He asked. “But who would do that?”

Ámbar scoffed. “Who else? Benicio and Emilia, of course,” she said, pissed off. “Or one of them, I don’t know. But it was at least one of them, I’m sure of it.” 

Annoyance flared inside Simón as well. He shook his head in disbelief, at both them and himself for not thinking of that before— God, it was so obvious. “I can’t believe them, what did they gain from this?”

“Bother you, bother me, or maybe they just get off on wreaking havoc,” Ámbar said, and bent down to discard her boots. 

Simón looked at her. “Why don’t you ban them from the Roller?” After this, she had to, right? 

Ámbar sighed, sitting criss-cross on the bed. “I thought about it, but I can’t,” she said regretfully. “I don’t have proof that they did anything and, even though the Red Sharks team doesn’t exist anymore, Vidia knows them. I’m…” She looked to the side, “honestly scared of what they could say to my superiors if I try to ban them.” 

Any lingering annoyance, tension, or worry from the day’s events evaporated at the look on her face. Simón reached over to hold her hand in his own. “You’re scared they might fire you,” he realized. 

“Yeah.” She looked at their joined hands. “I mean, this is not my ideal job or anything. But the Roller is my ideal place. Or, it used to be, at least. It was more of a home to me than my own house for years. So it feels kinda… special, to me, to be the manager now. I guess I just don’t… want that to end on bad terms.”

He ran his thumb up and down the back of her hand, taking in her words. He smiled. “From queen of the rink to manager… I don’t know if that’s a big leap or merely a formality.” 

That drew a smile from Ámbar. 

They spent some time like that in comfortable silence. After a moment, Simón moved a little closer to her, still holding her hand. 

“Can I ask you something?” He said quietly.

She looked at him. “Of course.”  

He hesitated for a second longer, thinking how to formulate the question. “Why… If everyone admired you already as the queen of the rink, why did you pick on Luna? Why did you choose to antagonize her so much?” 

Ámbar’s face dimmed. She looked down.  

“I just don’t understand how you could already hate her so much as to want to hurt her when she had just arrived here,” he said, gently, trying not to make her feel attacked in any way; he just wanted some clarity. “I… I never truly understood why you ever hated Luna in the first place. You explained to me the thing about the Red Sharks Festival and why you were so pissed at her party at the beginning of the year. But everything before that… Why was it?” 

He’d been wanting to ask this for a while. He had pieces, and he thought he knew a little, but he would never fully understand if she didn’t talk to him. He wouldn’t force her, of course. He’d considered just leaving it in the past and not mentioning it since it’d been a while since Ámbar’s attitude changed, but now, after what she’d confessed to him, he felt it was the right time to ask and see if she’d explain. Just for closure. Just to understand her better. 

Ámbar took a breath and let it out slowly— a soft, long sigh that seemed to give her strength just as much as it snuffed all the energy she ever had. 

“Well, Matteo was a factor,” she started, and her tone could’ve been mistaken for indifference if he didn’t know her better than that. “It was obvious from the beginning that he liked Luna, and that hurt, but… it hurt combined with everything else. Because it wasn’t just Matteo that liked her immediately— She was so easily liked by everyone. I had worked so hard to build my image and my popularity, and in just a matter of days, it was like everything revolved around her.” She grimaced. “I know it sounds like just petty jealousy but…” Her gaze stayed down, but even then he could see the cloud of something cover her face. It was a moment before she let the words out. “I had nothing.” 

Finally, the aching sadness hiding in her voice came to light between them, and it was like a knife in Simón’s chest. 

“If I wasn’t the queen of the rink, I had nothing,” she continued. “If I wasn’t the best at everything then people didn’t admire me, and if people didn’t admire me then… what did I have?” 

Simón’s throat tightened. It absolutely broke his heart how matter-of-factly she said all this, like it was a truth she’d known her whole life, and it weighed on her, left her void until he feared she’d vanish before his eyes.  

Where was Sharon? He wanted to say, to complain. He felt a spark of rage in a dark corner of himself he usually tried to deny existed. Where was this woman that she allowed Ámbar to feel so alone in the world? Where did she get off trying to ruin everyone’s lives and then running off, abandoning all her responsibilities? Why was it so hard for her to show Ámbar a mere speck of love? 

“I had Delfi and Jazmín, I guess,” Ámbar answered herself before he could say or do anything. Simón felt so powerless; frozen as he processed her grief. “We didn’t have the best friendship in the world, but… I should’ve appreciated them more.”  A moment passed and she straightened a bit, shaking herself slightly. “Whatever, it’s… that’s it. I felt like Luna was taking everything from me. My house, my boyfriend, my place in the Roller… so I wanted to take everything away from her too. I wanted her to hurt like I did.” 

Simón had seen the dark flame of anger and resentment in Ámbar’s face before. Many times, even before he got to really know her. This was the first time that seeing it hurt. 

He tightened his hold on her hand, the only thing he dared to do to not disrupt her. He didn’t agree with hurting Luna, of course not, but she already knew that and there was no need to say it. What he wanted her to know was I hear you, I’m with you. 

Ámbar met his eyes and the shadow of rancor faded away into a resigned smile; a tiny, sad thing. She shrugged weakly.  “But whatever I tried didn’t work. All I achieved was to make my life more miserable. I lost all my friends, I lost you…” Her gaze fell to their hands. A tiny smile appeared on her face again, but this time it came with a softness in her eyes.  “But for some inexplicable reason, even when I was at my worst times, you still had faith in me.” 

She reached over and held his hand between both of hers. “You saw I could be better under all that rage and that pain, and eventually, I started believing it too. And I realized that, although Luna shook my life forever… there was nothing I could do to change that. I didn’t get anything from raging at her being Sol Benson. I didn’t get anything from making her suffer, because even if it satisfied me somewhat, my life didn’t get any better because of it— In fact, it only seemed to get worse. So, I let it go,” she said with a light tone. “I let go of that rage I had for things I couldn’t change and Luna also couldn’t change.” She shrugged. “And here I am.” 

The lightness felt almost out of place after everything that had been said, but it was still a relief to see Ámbar okay, at ease, after how much she’d suffered. Simón almost didn’t want to— it felt too much of a solemn moment— but he found himself growing a tiny smile. He was so proud of her. For living all she went through and not letting it pull her under. For turning her life around against all her learned behaviors and finding the best version of herself. 

“Her little goody-two-shoes act still irks me sometimes though.”  

Yep, definitely still herself. 

Simón gave her a look, but there was no bite to it. “It’s not an act; she’s genuinely a good person.”

Ámbar waved it away half-heartedly. “Yeah, yeah, whatever.”  

He played with the fabric of his sweatpants. “So… can I assume you two won’t fight anymore?”

“Can I assume she’ll stop being annoying?” 

She rolled her eyes at the look on his face and held his shoulder with her free hand. “I’m kidding. I promise I’m not gonna antagonize your best friend anymore. We’re actually on pretty decent terms now. And even if we weren’t, I’d never put you in that position. You’re worth more to me than any rivalry I could have with anyone.” 

A surge of affection squeezed his heart. Simón brought her into his arms and hugged her tightly. “Thank you.” He pulled back to look at her. “Truly. For telling me all this. For trusting me, and for giving Luna a chance. It means a lot to me.” 

She held the back of his neck. “You mean a lot to me. So everything that’s important to you, it’s important to me too.” Her hand slid to cup his cheek. “There’s very little in this world I wouldn’t do for you, Simón.” 

His chest hurt again. His whole interior twisted and tore apart as if she had clawed him open, but it was the best feeling in the world. 

Simón pulled her close and kissed her. “I love you.” 

Ámbar smiled. “I love you too.” 

********************

Ever since Juliana came back, the Roller guys were more insufferable than ever. 

Benicio was sitting in the cafeteria, nursing a glass of juice as he waited for Emilia to start their morning practice. Lately, everywhere he looked he could see the losers’ smiling faces, hear their ridiculous laughs over the stupidest things, and worst of all, he had to live knowing they used his rink every afternoon. 

Benicio clenched his jaw. He missed the old days. He missed seeing the logo of the Red Sharks followed by his picture on the screens.  But no matter. People would respect them eventually. Everyone would come to know he was the best, one way or another. 

He tapped his fingers idly on the table, switching between looking at his phone and throwing glances at the entrance of the Roller. Waiting would be more fun if he could look at Ámbar while at it, maybe get a rinse out of her— she looked so gorgeous when she got mad— but for some reason, she wasn’t at her usual table today. Maybe she would arrive later. Or maybe he was the one too late to catch a glimpse of her before she went out somewhere. 

The next time he lifted his head to check if Emilia had arrived, it wasn’t her nor Ámbar who he saw. Simón was marching towards him before he was even aware of his presence on the other end of the Roller. He stood in front of him with an accusatory look just as Benicio left his phone on the table. 

“I know it was you and Emilia who tightened those skates.” 

Benicio repressed the urge to smirk. Oh yeah, that had been a masterstroke on his part. At first, he’d been dubious about how much of an uproar such a small thing could cause, but it was just a matter of choosing the right target. Oh, how he would’ve loved to stay there yesterday to watch it all go down, but it was too risky, so he and Emilia left when the woman marched to berate Ámbar. 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he responded innocently.  

Simón scoffed. “You’re always like that; throwing the stone and hiding your hand, blaming others. Even back in Mexico. You’re a coward, Benicio.”

“Don’t project on me, Simón,” he said simply. He laid back on his chair, his hands clasped together casually on the table. Maybe he had to look up at him due to their positions, but he was the true superior one here. “Whatever problem you had doing your job has nothing to do with me. And, I mean, why do you even worry? You have your little girlfriend to defend you. Oh, right, your boss, sorry.” 

Simón shook his head, staring at him with a mix of annoyance and incredulity. “You’re just never going to stop, are you?” He said. “Does seeing me with Ámbar really make you that jealous? Well, pity, because that’s not going to change.” A smile full of hostility and condescension appeared on his face. “All your little stunt with the skates achieved was that we had a very deep conversation and now we’re closer than ever. So, thank you. And give my thanks to Emilia as well, okay?” 

Benicio tightened the grip of his hands until it hurt. Simón placed his hands on the table and leaned closer, dropping the fake smile. “Stop wasting your time and don’t cause any more trouble for Ámbar or you’ll be dealing with me,” he said sharply, his expression dark and serious. “If you really cared about her, that’d be the minimum you would do.” 

Simón stormed away, not deigning him with the luxury of a comeback.

Benicio stayed in his seat, festering in his anger. 

Simón could laugh all he wanted now but Ámbar would be his in the end. Step by step, he would make sure of it. 

…

..

.

------------------

Okay I’m sorry for pointing this out myself but it’s so funny because: 

Simón: Ámbar is so much cooler than me, she’s seen the world, her default is luxury, she’s smart, she’s driven, she’s gonna go out there and eat the world up and I’m gonna be here waiting tables. 

Ámbar: Simón is so cool, he knows so many things that I have no idea about, I don’t know how he manages to be a waiter, I wouldn’t have the patience for it, and with a smile no less! He always gives his best, I admire him so much, I hope someday I can be half the person he is. 

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Also, how ironic is it that me, the writer, realized this juxtaposition just now as I was writing it? 😂 Like, I didn’t plan on Ámbar having that introspection moment there, it just happened, and then I went… oh. skjfdnskf. Simón, my boy. He had a rough time today but it ended on a high note <3 He’ll miss that eventually.  

[the-chronicles-of-a-bookworm]

hi Hannah!! I'm slightly late but 🤷‍♀️

(for the nosy ask thing)

13, 14, 15, 16, 18 (only if you're comfy tho), 19, 20, 21, 22, 25, 26, 28, 44

(I'm a super nosy person so)

I noticed your nosiness last time I had a last game! My hands were so tired after typing 😭 im not complaining tho THIS IS SO FUNN

13: biggest turn ons Nice hands. A professional speaking voice. Perfect grammar. Someone who doesn't curse, whispering some curse word under their breath. Like "fuck" really quietly that almost no one would hear. Someone who can genuinely make me laugh. Stupid, witty banter (like percy and annabeth before and after they started dating). A nice smile. WOAH WOAH WOAH STOP HANNAH STOP

14: Biggest turn offs Inflated ego. Insulting people for just existing (like james did to snape) Dishonesty. LITTERING. Being rude. LITTERING. Being really shabby or unhygienic. Someone who makes a mess when eating. Someone who doesn't use cutlery in the appropriate situations (i mean, im indian. we practically invented eating with our hands, but I use cutlery when its appropriate okay? I don't attack my rice of something with my hands in formal situations.) Did I mention littering?

15: Favorite Movie (answered here) but I also want a malayalam movie "Ennum Ninde Moideen" ITS SO GOOD

16: I'll love you if... (tbh I already love you <3) BUT YOU SHOULD READ PERCY JACKSON IF YOU ALREADY HAVEN'T (idk if this counts as an answer tho *sobs*)

JUST A WARNING: THE FOLLOWING QUESTION HAS TRIGERRING STUFF LIKE RAPE, FAMILY STUFF, AND SHITTY FAMILY MEMBERS, SO DONT READ IF YOU'RE NOT COMFORTABLE This is the first time I've ever talked about this to anyone. I don't ever talk about stuff like this, but I think it's time I open up a little.

18: Traumatic Experience When I was 12, I noticed that my grandfather was being a little too touchy. Whenever he got the chance, he would find a way to touch me and make me uncomfortable. I thought this was normal for grandparents to do. I'd known him my whole life. I trusted him, loved him, told him everything. Until he started calling me into his bedroom. Started telling me to undress myself. Started telling me let him "check" my privates to see if there is any problem. For a while, I let him. I let him touch me. Why would he do anything to harm me? I always thought. It got a little too much. Too much that I started screaming for help. I thought, somebody, anybody would help me. Because I knew a grandparent wouldn't do this. I knew this was wrong. And once it all settled, and my parents sorted it out. I was guilty. I blamed myself. I kept thinking "How many time has your mother told you about people touching you. How many times?". And as I was sitting there, I could hear my mother literally wailing. She was screaming. My father and uncle knew about this as well. I had never seen them this angry before. The worst part? We could do fucking nothing. My grandfather was the only reason we could stay in our apartment. It was a hard time and we were struggling with money. My grandmother was facing depression. Her mental state so bad, that I knew she couldn't know about this. My grandfather got away, scotch free. Every time I see him, I think about telling my grandmother. The man she fusses over everyday is not who she thinks he is. But I couldn't. My aunt went into denial. She kept saying that her father wouldn't do such a thing. No one else knew. Whenever I see him, I go into a state where I feel ants all over my body. It goes after a while, but it always stays. (It's a lot to consume. But it felt good to let it all out)

19: A fact about your personality I can get angry easily, and once you've done that I can get so damn scary. My aunt told me that, after she saw me and my brother fight with eachother once, when he broke my laptop.

20: What I hate most about myself I'm ugly.

21: What I love about myself I'm actually pretty smart. It may sound really egoistical, hence why I don't like answering this question, but I know I'm smart. That's why I keep trying to achieve more, you know?

22: What I want to be when I grow older? Oncologist or gynecologist surgeon. Once I retire from actually working in the medical field, I'll be a professor for a medical school.

25: My idea of a perfect date Something at home. Maybe napping a little, eating takeout, watching a movie, listening to music. If we're going out, I want to go to some amusement park. or some 24/7 grocery store. Or McDonalds.

26: Biggest pet peeves Someone chewing with their mouth open. Scraping your plate WITH A METAL FORK. PLEASE FOR GOD'S SAKE STOP. Chewing gum loudly. Not covering their coughs and sneezes. "You act so gayyy" UGH SO ANNOYING I KNOW I ACT GAY OKAY?

28: A description of the people I hate most

44: A random fact DID YOU KNOW THAT A PIG CANNOT PHYSICALLY LOOK UP TO SEE THE SKY? DID YOU KNOW A SHRIMP'S HEART IS IN ITS HEAD? DID YOU KNOW SOME PEOPLE ARE ACTUALLY REALLY STUPID SOMETIMES?

[byakurenbreak]

A Ship Thing I saw that I’m gonna use for Matt/Asha, because I barely see any content of this pairing

1. …I think this GIF answers that question

2. They switch, but Matt’s usually the big spoon because I like to imagine he’s super cuddly

3. Asha could pick Matt up, no problem.

4. Matt knows that Asha can hold up her own, so he doesn’t worry as much as she does. On the other hand, Asha tends to worry more when they’re out on the “battlefield” or when he’s off somewhere by himself.

5. Asha. She’d probably let Matt try it every once in a while if they wanted to do some NyteBlayde roleplaying, but Asha likes Matt more when he’s himself.

6. Depends on the situation. If they’re together, like if they’re working or just hanging out on the ship, Matt will usually initiate kisses. But if they’ve been apart for a while (ie; Asha getting rescued from her simulation) Asha will always kiss Matt first.

7. Asha probably is more used to waking up early, while Matt likely stays up half the night hacking or playing games.

8. They both have their moments where they act before they think. Matt is probably the more likely candidate.

9. Matt confesses his feelings first, but Asha says “I love you” before he can finish

10. Asha’s probably better, but they both prefer going out.

11. Matt. Complete with a NyteBlayde impression and bad puns.

12. Matt usually feels insecure that most of the Saints are usually out with guns blazing while he’s hidden behind a screen, but Asha tells him that he’s very helpful with what he does.

13. Yes. Both would.

14. Yes, but they’d do it differently. Asha would kick the perpetrator’s ass, while Matt would ruin their life using whatever technology he can come across.

15. Matt’s a selfie guy, usually taking pictures with Asha in the background doing her own thing with the caption “Hanging out with GF ❤️”

16. Matt

17. Asha

18. Matt’s super pale, so Asha finds it pretty easy to make him blush over anything. Even if he tries to deny that he’s blushing, it’s written all over his face.

19. Asha sits on Matt’s lap, while Matt likes laying his head on Asha’s lap

20. Matt

21. At that point, they’re both comfortable in their relationship that butterflies only seem happen when one of them goes out of their way to make a romantic gesture. Or if they see their partner doing something cool.

22. Matt’s NyteBlayde impression never fails to make Asha laugh. While it’s not the reaction he expected the first time he did that, he was happy to know that she thought it was funny. Asha’s laugh is cute too, so that’s a huge bonus.

23. Oh god, Matt just. Chugging Saints Flow when he’s planning to pull an all nighter doing who knows what on his laptop, and Asha’s like “I swear, if you keep me up all night with this, I’ll kill you.”

24. Asha’s more ticklish, but Matt has only tickled her once. He wound up not needing to wear makeup on his left eye for about a week. While it was convenient, he doesn’t plan on making that mistake again. Black eyes just aren’t worth it.

25. Asha

26. Matt probably comes home with a stray kitten once every month. They never keep the cats, but they always go to the animal shelter across the street

27. They both have their own blankets so they don’t have that problem, but Matt usually finds himself under Asha’s blanket when he wakes up in the morning

28. Neither.

29. Again, neither. However!! Rina (my Saints Row “Playa”) dedicates certain songs to Matt and Asha whenever she performs a song cover anywhere.

30. After seeing Matt get killed over and over in her simulation, she vows to never let that happen for real.

31. Matt

32. Asha

33. Matt

34. Asha

35. Asha wears some of Matt’s T-shirts sometimes

36. Neither. It’s a bit embarrassing for both of them when people catch them in the act, or overhear them being all lovey-dovey

37. Matt for sure.

38. This is Saints Row, guys. When do they NOT swear?

39. Asha usually speaks Hindi in her sleep, but Matt can tell whether or not it’s about him. No particular reason, it’s just intuition.

40. Matt. In fact, meeting Asha was one of the many factors that gave him a reason to redeem himself.

Phew, that’s all of them. I’m on mobile so I can’t add a “read more”, so sorry if this clogs up your dash!

[oc-cafe]

I posted 493 times in 2022

That's 493 more posts than 2021!

88 posts created (18%)

405 posts reblogged (82%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@oc-cafe

@jewishdainix

@desifandom

@ghostdragoncookiept2

@stressedsnake

I tagged 220 of my posts in 2022

#the royalty representation project - 34 posts

#mod sam✨ - 34 posts

#mod 🔥 - 33 posts

#mod sam - 16 posts

#aditi the desi disney princess - 15 posts

#mod🔥 - 14 posts

#mod ares - 13 posts

#original character - 12 posts

#aditi boundless - 11 posts

#mod sam ✨ - 10 posts

Longest Tag: 98 characters

#once again sorry for disturbing you all my moots are indian so i didn't really know where to start

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

i made this on a browser program on a dell laptop yall BETTER appreciate it

one of these couples is canon'nt

anywAY HAPPY PRIDE MONTH

Taglist (Ask to add):

@minaglobe

@thisismisogynoir for daraja, lemme know if you want me to remove

50 notes - Posted June 3, 2022

#4

TW/CW: Body Horror, Swearing, All Caps, Bold/Italicised text; for the story: Death and Bloodshed

Ah, Nelaghati, the most charming kingdom in the world! Its splendorous architecture, natural beauty, easy-going (for the most part) populace, benevolent rulers, shape-shifting yuvrajnee- wait a minute.

Aditi, the ‘yuvrajnee’ or crown princess of the kingdom of Nelaghati, leads a normal (see: boring) life. Each day like the list, threatening to drown her in its monotonous repetition, keeping her well within the limits of what she could accomplish, of what she wanted to accomplish.

So when she finds something that might break her from this tedious routine, well, who is she to refuse?

But is this newfound power really all it’s cracked up to be?

Coming Soon! 

~~~

Remember Aditi? Take a little refresher if you don’t. We’re giving her her own story, and the first chapter should come out soon if everything goes smoothly, so stay tuned!

And for those wondering why I didn’t include the shape-shifting in the trailer, well, the trailer was more of an on-the-spot thing. And yes, the beast was created to get a what-the-fuck reaction. Would you pet it?

61 notes - Posted May 25, 2022

#3

I PRESENT TO YOU

the main cast. because i need to finish the story but i'm also a chronic procrastinator so RIP

First up, Princess Daraja Adesina!!! 

You know her and you love her!!! Please welcome our main character!! 

she/her

Daraja is our main character, one of the most resourceful and curious people from our story and I think she's really cool! Let us know what you think!

Okay next up from the land, is of course the wonderful Eren Abbas, we love her

See the full post

63 notes - Posted April 20, 2022

#2

Episode 1: Dusty Old Book

Once again, please check the trigger warnings before proceeding, since this story will probably have death, violence and angst and mentions of blood.

Cover made with Canva, crossposted on my wattpad account.

A silent figure walked through the busy streets of Nelaghati. Draped in a simple cotton sari and a few ornaments, she blends in easily with the bustling crowd. She pulled her pallu over her head, partly because of the heat, partly to avoid anyone recognising her.

There will be plenty of time to get back to her later. First, let us have a look around this charming town.  

Nelaghati was a beautiful, busy place. Bursting with colour and life, this kingdom was sure to enthrall any who came by. 

Now, our 'Silent Figure' was walking in the streets of Nelaghati's biggest marketplaces. The area is buzzing with people. Vendors selling their wares, street performers performing, a suspicious person selling even more suspicious trinkets, and so many more things, but if we stop to list them all we will never get to the point. 

She hurried past all the people trying to stop her, to convince her to try their items, to warn her about all those 'other sellers' who won't have such amazing quality or prices, but eventually she escapes them all, and found her way to a secluded spot, where a horse with a velvety brown coat and a black mane was impatiently waiting for her. It neighed disapprovingly.

Now, here's two things about the horse that our reader might find interesting. One, that it belonged to Aditi, AKA our 'Silent Figure'; and two, that it bore the royal seal. 

Aditi lowered her pallu and lovingly stroked the horse. She held up a dusty old book.

"Look what I got!" 

The horse seemed unimpressed. 

"Hey, hey, look, I'm sorry. I came back here as soon as I could."

It seemed satisfied with her - admittedly flimsy - apology and she mounted it in a second, gently squeezing its side with her legs to make it start moving. 

They rode for a while, gradually gaining speed , Aditi getting more and more harrowed by the second. They soon reached the small wood that bordered the palace. 

The wood was a wonderful resource, and although it was certainly very pleasant, it would take a while to get through, which only increased Aditi's distress.

"Tvarte, tvarte," She urged her horse on as calmly as she could, which was, to be fair, not very calm. "We're running late!" 

Somehow managing to get to the palace in record time, she led her horse to the stables, unbridling, untacking and giving it water. She assigned the stable hand to groom it, and after making them swear not to tell anyone she had been out, she headed towards her chambers, hoping to make it there without anybody else seeing her.  

"Aditi! Where have you been?!" She heard a familiar voice hiss into her ear. 

"Rekha, hey, do you mind not telling anyone?" 

Rekha, her handmaiden, rolled her eyes. 

"You're lucky no one noticed. Yet. And what's that you're trying to hide?"

Aditi raised her hands in surrender, one hand still grasping the dusty old book. 

"You got me." 

"Wait, wait, wait. So you sneaked out, even though you knew that you could get into massive trouble for that, all for a Dusty Old Book? 

"Yes?"

"... alright. Let's get you cleaned up before someone notices."

Aditi grinned. "You're a lifesaver, Rekha."

Rekha made no reply and simply led Aditi away, all the while chastising her about how much trouble she would have gotten into - to which Aditi could only smile ruefully and utter a quick apology - and quickly scrubbed her down, removing all the branches and brambles and dirt she had managed to get in her hair. She waited as Aditi got dressed in her more 'regal' sari, and royal ornaments, and then gently wove gajra flowers into her silky black tresses, which had been tied up in a low bun. 

"So, where did you get the book?"

See the full post

72 notes - Posted June 7, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

See the full post

314 notes - Posted March 17, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[percontaion-points]

Crush chapters 13-16

Click to see the rest of the snark & image descriptions

Chapter 13

“I wasn’t raised to spend money like you. The pendant and now—”

I’m still of the opinion that you could make that necklace for under $50. 

I lean in to kiss him, and just like that, the sweetness between us turns to something else. Something that has my palms sweating and fear coating my throat.

Chapter 13 summary: The two boys get into yet another pissing contest. After about a page of this, Grace is like “Well, okay. Bye.” She turns to leave with Flint’s phone, since she doesn’t have hers. 

But then Jaxon comes up and tells her to use this other phone instead. Grace instantly knows that it’s not Jaxon’s, and asks where it is that he got a brand new phone in less than an hour in the middle of nowhere Alaska. (Remember that it’s 90 minutes to the nearest town via snowmobile.) Then most of the rest of the chapter is spent with Jaxon reassuring her that money is no object whatsoever. 

As he goes to kiss her, Grace has to push down this sense of wrongness when he touches her. She says that she needs time, which he understands, considering that she went through an ordeal. But there’s something much worse than her having lost four months…

Chapter 14

“You’re so lucky to have found Jaxon so young. Most of us have to wait much longer.”

I don’t know what the hell that this even means. Because the two of them knew each other for a week, they dated for all of three days, and then Grace disappeared for four months. 

That’s neither romantic nor does it tell me that these kids are going to be together in any sort of long-term capacity. 

But as I make my way to my room to change and then hustle out the side door into the frigid March air, I can’t help but wonder if Jaxon’s even going to try to “shenanigan” me again. And what about my gargoyle is so against it.

Chapter 14 summary: Grace awkwardly stands there, not quite sure how to properly explain to Jaxon everything that’s wrong with her right then. But then the bell for the end of the period rings, and students come out, which puts a damper on the conversation. 

Macy shows up, and Jaxon leaves so that Grace can spend at least a little bit of time with her cousin. Macy says she has a huge stockpile of ice cream and wants Grace to ditch class so that they can pig out, but Grace says no. This goes on for a while, and includes Macy randomly saying that Grace is “lucky” to have found Jaxon. 

The chapter ends with the two of them going to their individual classes. 

Chapter 15

When I’m finally ready for whatever monstrosity is going to be waiting for me—or as ready as I can be—I open my eyes and stare at my picture.

Chapter 15 summary: Grace goes to art class, where the teacher decides to waive the first two projects of the semester and to get her started on the third. Grace paints for a bit, and while the paint is drying a bit, she gets out her laptop (which she still has, but not her phone?) and sees a bunch of increasingly frantic messages from Heather, her friend from California. She makes some paper thin excuse about having broken her phone and how Alaska shuts down during the winter. 

After classes are over for the day, Grace goes back to her room, intent to have a moment alone before Macy shows up. But Macy is lying in wait with confetti and a Harry Styles song, so they dance for a moment. When the song is over, Macy says she wants to do face masks, and then brings up what Grace looked like as a gargoyle. Grace is surprised that Macy saw, and Macy is surprised that neither Jaxon nor Finn showed her any pictures. Grace doesn’t want to look, but she also kind of does. 

Chapter 16

“Now, let’s put on some of these face masks. I’ll fill you in on the gossip you missed, and you can tell me all about what it’s like to be mated.”

Chapter 16 summary: I don’t know what Grace or myself were expecting, but the picture Macy shows her is basically Grace but made of stone with a few gargoyle accessories: horns, wings, and claws. 

Macy expands a bit on what Finn had already told her. That all of these experts showed up, determined that it was simply a witch’s curse or something like that. After all, there haven’t been any gargoyles for thousands of years, so why now? However, as also mentioned by Finn, none of them had anything useful, and only wanted to basically gawk at her. 

[sortasirius]

What the Fuck Happened to the SPN Finale?

Okay so here it is, my Charlie Kelly style manifesto.

Before I get into it, I recognize that I will look like this to many of you, and that’s okay, I understand:

Secondly, your personal Takes about the writers don’t interest me, I don’t need to hear them. This, as I’ll explain, is going to remain a writer positive blog, and that’s the end of it.

Third, and most importantly: some of what I’m going to talk about is fact, and some is highly educated speculation. I will notate what is speculation, just so there’s no confusion or hot takes in my inbox that I’m a conspiracy theorist or stirring shit up for no reason.

A list of what I’ll be discussing

The episode in regards to the rest of the season

The episode issues: length, editing

Scene placement and speculation of scenes cut

The scrubbing of Jack, Cas, Eileen

Network involvement and general timeline of when things were cut

Misha: theories on where he was, official company line, why we can’t expect to hear anything directly

The silence of the cast post episode (in Misha’s case, mid episode) and what this might mean

Jensen speaking with Kripke about the ending: why it doesn’t mean what you might think (also why kripke remained positive on the ending)

Walker, and why this episode had a major shift

Why the network would do this or get involved

Why the writers of the show simply aren’t the bad guys here, and what I “want” out of this post, since I know it’ll get asked

This is very long and under a cut, but I hope you’ll give it a read.

The Episode In Regards to the Rest of the Season

So, I’ve discussed this already here, but it’s the most obvious thing to me, and that’s the way this episode simply doesn’t fit with the rest of the season.

These people in this room have, truly, been nothing but consistent when it comes to their arcs, especially this season, and the marked dropoff in quality for the finale episode is just too sus to discount to me.  Dabb’s whole focus has been character-based.  In his seasons, we’ve moved far away from MOTW and bro-codependency, the found family taking it’s place.  Does it really sit right to anyone that that was all thrown away in literally the last episode of the entire show?

This is speculation on my part, but as a writer myself, there is no way I would be happy or willing to stamp my name on something that I didn’t think would, at the very least, wrap up the season+ character arcs that I and my team had been crafting.

And before anyone comes in here saying, “well GOT did that!”  Bruh.  The writing was on the wall for GOT long before the final episode.  You could tell that the showrunners just wanted to be done (not only from the plot, but from the fact that they lobbied for a shorter season).  Miss me with that, it doesn’t apply here.  Andrew has, besides Singer and J2, been with the show longer than anyone.  He cares, he is meticulous and detailed, and this ending feels worse than anything Bucklemming has ever written, let alone Dabb.

Additionally, I’ve seen a lot of people say that Dabb was never behind Destiel, that it was all Bobo and Meredith and no one else.  That is reductive to the point of insult of the work Dabb has done to get this greenlit.  This man did not write the s13 Dean grief arc to be slandered like this.  That being said, YES, Bobo and Meredith were the leads on the DeanCas arc this season, but ANDREW IS THE SHOWRUNNER, TO GET EVEN THE CONFESSION APPROVED BY THE NETWORK HE WOULD HAVE TO HAVE THEIR BACKS.  AND HE DID.

Finale Issues

So, now that we’ve gotten the fact that this episode doesn’t hit on any of the major themes the show was barrelling towards all season, let’s discuss the fact that the episode is just...weird.

Not only is it shorter than any other episode (I think with the intro and the credits/crew thing at the end, it was around 38 mins), but it was also...idk, 90% filler?

One of the lovely humans in the POLOL server did the legwork here, and broke it down:

This is weird, y’all.  Most series finales are LONGER than normal (Lost, SOA, Longmire are the ones I can think of off the top of my head), and for the final episode to be this?  I saw more than one person point out that we only really needed 19 episodes, what was the point of 20?  AND THAT’S EXACTLY IT?  WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THIS FINAL EPISODE IF THIS WAS ALL WE WERE SUPPOSED TO GET?

It simply doesn’t make any sense, the first half of the episode was rushed, a final monster hunt gone wrong, but in the second half?  Nothing really happened?  Sam lived his entire life and Dean just drove around.  It doesn’t make sense to have all the emotional arcs left unaddressed in an episode that definitely needed some kind of spark.

Here’s the speculation I have: the episode seemingly went through a lot of changes between the initial inception of the final season and when we actually got it, but I think it would have been passable (as in, we wouldn’t be sitting here asking each other why each arc feels incomplete) until the editing room got ahold of it.  The only think that makes this episode make sense is network fuckery.  Truly, that is the only thing.  It explains the weird, cuts, the rushed pacing of the first half followed by nothing in the second half, the double montages of “Wayward Son” back to back, and Dean just...driving around for the last half of the episode.

Scene Placement and Speculation of Scenes Cut

Before I get into this section, the info of the shots in the episode I have come from a source that @occamshipper​ got a week or so before the finale.  She’s talked about this here.

So here’s what Min was given:

1-5: 1 INT MEN OF LETTERS – DEAN’S ROOM Dean is greeted by Miracle

6-10: 6 INT MEN OF LETTERS – HALLWAY/SAM’S ROOM Sam has his routine

D1 1 11-15: 15 EXT FARM HOUSE Establishing

N1 1/8 16-20: 19 Dad’s journal, marker, drawing of masked man in journal.

21-25: 23 INT IMPALA – PMP Driver picks the music

N2 1 3/8 1,2 26-30: 28pt2 INT BARN: A face from the past

28pt3 Sam and Dean say goodbye

28pt4 Shot early for technical reasons, presumably the overhead shot

N2 31-45: 41 INT MEN OF LETTERS – SAM’S ROOM Sam’s alarm goes off D4 1/8 1 46-60: 56 INT N7glasses for Sam, laptop.

So...it all fits right?  It all tracks with the actual episode, where it lands, etc.  The issue is between shots 29-40 which were apparently “too big to spoil.”  Uh.  Where are they?  And where’s 28 pt4?

After Dean dies, the next scene is Sam burning him, then shot 31, the shot of his alarm going off.

So.  Where are those 11ish shots?

PLUS we have the boards, which are scenes we KNOW were actually shot:

As well as scenes for 20 that were shot in 19.

It’s just...weird, it’s weird and again hits on the fact that the episode is so short and like 80% montage.

The Scrubbing of Jack, Cas, and Eileen

So now we have to reckon with the fact that Eileen was last mentioned by Sam after she got snapped by Chuck, Jack’s last mention is that he’s off being God somewhere, and Cas’ last mention is a ~knowing look~ between Dean and Bobby.

I’m sorry, make it make sense:

????????  That’s the end if it?  They don’t need to be discussed after this???  It’s just simply not something a writer would do, they would not introduce these characters, these arcs, without thinking there’s going to be some kind of follow through here.

So not only were three major characters (including two leads and both of the original characters’ love interests) completely wiped from the finale episode, it was as though Sam and Dean never even needed them, which just...ain’t it.

So why Eileen and Jack too?  Why not just take Cas out of it if they were afraid of the gay?  Because, ultimately, the episode went back to Kripke’s original story: just the bros, they only need each other and no one else.  They don’t want anyone else, they don’t need anyone else.  Easier to go back to something they knew was successful than trust the writers and their audience and take a big leap.

Alex even said he shot for 20 with “some of the guys” here.  What happened to that footage?

The complete 180 of it all still shocks me, I still cannot believe that we were essentially at the finish line, and the network just stopped short, and decided to go run another race, at the expense of the arc of this fifteen year legacy show.

Network Involvement and When Things Were Cut

Okay, now into the juicy stuff.

So I’ve pretty well established that network fuckery is clear, but how much did they get involved, what was the original intent?

Well again, we may never actually know what Andrew’s original script was, but I think, at the least, it would involve Dean speaking his truth to Cas and Sam living a life with Eileen.

Now, it seems today, that Misha said that Jimmy Novak was supposed to be in the finale in one iteration of the script, and while initially my brain was like “that truly makes no sense and he’s either straight up lying or telling a half truth,” I think what may be happening is Misha talking about as much as he can right now.

So Jimmy right.  Weird as fuck.  Why would he been in the Roadhouse and not Cas?  My current thought (this is about as reachy as I’ll get) is that Jimmy had no lines, could he have been in the Roadhouse as a red herring, like it said “Jimmy” in the script but it was just Cas in human clothes, a way to get around the network saying Cas couldn’t be in the final scene.  Also, you’ll notice that Misha didn’t say that Cas wasn’t supposed to be in the ep at all, just Jimmy in the last scene.

All this to say, there have clearly been multiple versions of the script, getting lighter and lighter with Cas and Eileen as the network pulled further and further back.  Remember, Dabb has to get things approved before they get shot, and if the network kept asking and asking and asking to cut Cas and Eileen, he had to find a way to work around it.  Granted, I still think that if we had been able to get a Dabb script that wasn’t torn to shreds in editing, it wouldn’t be so bad.  It may not be what a lot of us wanted (Dean speaking his truth to Cas and a reciprocation), but doing everything he could to give it to us in subtext or visual clues.

Plus, in all honesty, my man can’t keep his story straight anyway.  He said twice in his panel that the Empty and offscreen Heaven ending weren’t his original ending either.

In addition, remember that Jensen did ADR post episode 18, AND said in a meet and greet last weekend that Dean’s reaction to Cas’ confession was “cut down.” (Source here).  Many of us clowns got excited when we first heard about ADR, because we thought it would be upping the ante on Dean’s reaction, but I remember being a little sus when it was just crying.  My speculation on that is that they cut out Dean actually SAYING something, @winchestersingerautorepair​ spoke about that here.

The biggest sins were, in my opinion, committed during editing, where the network got too gun shy and sliced the episode until it was nothing but a heartless bro-fest of a finale, not mentioning anything about the other major characters that we all love, and letting the boys just suffer in separation until Sam died and finally joined Dean in Heaven.  The editing came by cutting all the major emotional beats between anyone other than Dean and Sam, leaving the skeleton of the story intact, just shorter and less...poignant than it was ever supposed to be.

Misha

We know Misha was in Vancouver, we know he quarantined, but we also know he wasn’t in the final scene, when he spoke about being in the last moment of the show months ago.  We were not crazy, he was there, he quarantined, and, in all likelihood (speculation but fitting with the timeline), he actually may have shot something (not much, but something).

I have sources here, here, here, and here showing where Misha was at that time.

Remember, the man was completely open about coming back until they finished shooting (look at this thread).  The switch happened, just like everything else, halfway through them shooting.

Please also remember Jake Abel posting his “Where’s Misha” video here.  Jake isn’t malicious, he isn’t being nasty here.  Misha was there, and everyone that’s trying to convince people he’s wasn’t just...isn’t telling the truth about it.

This is one of the things that makes me really mad, because they’re literally attempting to gaslight people into thinking, “oh we were totally wrong he was never supposed to be there” WHEN HE WAS THERE, WE KNOW HE WAS THERE.

So we’ve already heard from several people (Meghan Fitzmartin, Jay, a PA on the set of 19 (WHO WAS NOT WORKING FOR 20), Misha himself) that this was all down to Covid restrictions.  Ultimately, as this post says, we’ve heard FIVE versions of where Misha was.  None of it makes sense, but the Covid protocol seems to be the company line that others are repeating.

You may ask: why?  Why lie to all of us when we have questions?  Why, in Jay’s case, say that we’re all spreading false lies to stir up trouble, when we just have questions and things that do not make sense.  Simply?  Warner Brothers is absolutely massive.  These people have their careers to protect and are likely all under NDAs.  They want to work for WB again and don’t want to burn bridges, including Misha.  It sucks, but that’s why it’s unlikely that we’ll hear someone come out and say, “yeah we’re lying to you.”

Silence of the Cast Post Episode

So this is...probably the worst part of all this, at least in my opinion.

The guys had all been pretty excited about the end of the show (especially Jared, but Jensen’s panel last week was Jensen as happy and jokey and positive as I’ve ever seen him.  He was so excited about episode 18, about what it meant for Dean and for Cas, and I just cannot buy that he would have been that excited unless he thought there was something more in the episode.

Misha live-tweeted the episode, and was watching it with his kids.  It’s well known that Misha and the kids don’t watch the show because it’s too scary, and let’s ask ourselves, why would he have them watch an episode that he’s barely even mentioned in?

He also stopped live-tweeting at a very specific point in the episode (Dean’s death) and has not mentioned Supernatural since then. 

None of them, not Jared, Jensen, Misha, or even Alex, said anything about the episode for nearly 36 hours, when Jensen posted a salty photo on instagram.  It’s just...not what you’d expect for the end of a 15 year show, when the cast and crew are so close to the fans, so close to each other. 

My theory?  They didn’t know.  They thought Misha was, at least, going to be in the episode in some way, and when he wasn’t, they decided not to say anything.

You really think that Jensen “Heller” Ackles would have been so excited about the end of the show last week if he thought Cas wasn’t going to be in it at all?  Nah son, doesn’t make any sense.

Even today, in Jared and Misha’s panels, they seemed sad and...more than a little careful, both saying that there were things they couldn’t say, both talking around things that we all have questions on.

Jensen Speaking with Kripke

So this is where a lot of people are getting fodder to take shots at the writers, saying that Jensen hated it from the beginning, but I don’t think so.  I actually think I know what Jensen went to him about, and it wasn’t the lack of Cas or the weird pacing or the montages (which I don’t think were there when Jensen got the script); I think it was the manner of Dean’s death.

I know a lot of people were upset about that, upset with how...normal it was, coming off an episode where they literally beat God.  I actually didn’t mind it, I thought it was an interesting thematic take to be like: you can be a hero all your life, but sometimes shit happens, and you just die.

But imagine how hard that was for Jensen to read.  He would run to Kripke for that, because for him, Dean dying by being impaled by a piece of rebar had to be tough to swallow.

So, why didn’t Kripke say that?  Why didn’t he say, “oh well he had a problem with Dean’s death, none of that other stuff was in the script.”

Guys.  Why would he get involved?  He’s not going to burn bridges any more than anyone else is.  He said the ending was good because it’s the easy thing to do, it’s simple, will cause him no problems in his career, and he can just ignore the people trying to engage with him on it.

Walker

Something else to talk about is the major shift this episode had from the rest of the season: the shift from Dean to Sam.  I am NOT saying that Sam isn’t important, he definitely, absolutely is, but it was DEAN who really needed to wrap up his arc, Sam just needed to move on, get married to Eileen, become the leader he was always meant to.  So what changed?  What was with the shirtless scene, the Austin number and random case there, most of the episode being heavily Sam focused, going through his entire life in a montage?

Anyone else notice the 375 Walker promos, or Jared’s little spiel about Walker and how he hoped SPN fans would “come along for the ride.”

It’s...kinda obvious?  CW wanted to appeal to who they think the key demographic of SPN and Walker is: rural areas in the South.  It would explain a lot, why so much editing, why so Sam focused, the Austin number, the number of Walker promos, all of it.

I’m not saying this is fact, I don’t know that it is, but it is a little suspicious that even in Jared’s panel today, he talked A LOT about Walker and how he hopes SPN fans will watch it.

Why Would the Network Get Involved?

Simply put: $$$

If they think Walker can be the new SPN, and that those crazy SPN fans liked it originally, it’s a lot safer to go with the “original intent” of the show than do something risky (like making one of your two original leads queer).

And?  They don’t care.  They don’t care that the episode didn’t make sense, they don’t care that all the emotional arcs were left hanging, they don’t care by (potentially) smashing together two of Dean’s monologues (one to Sam, one to Cas) that it came of as...gross. ( @curioussubjects​ wrote a beautiful post showing how part of that death speech was likely meant for Dean here).  They don’t care, they never have, they just want to make their money and move on from the too-loud fandom that fought for representation too hard for too long.

It can’t help but feel insidious, which, honestly, it might be, but it really all comes down to the next cash cow, which, they think, is Walker, even at the cost of the fifteen year legacy show.

The Writers and What I Want

So here it is, all this weird, sus shit laid out on the line.  And you know what?  To me, there is no way to blame the writers, because they didn’t want this.

I don’t think Dabb and Bobo would have gone ahead with the confession in 18 without thinking that there would be some closure to that arc, they wouldn’t have done that not only to the fans, but for the sake of their own story as well: no writer wants to start something that they can’t finish. (And this applies to both Cas and Eileen).

Here’s a basic rundown of what I think happened: they had a clear arc from 18-20, ending in reciprocation at some level from Dean, Sam marrying Eileen, Hunter Sam as the new Bobby, Dean in heaven with Cas and big roadhouse reunion at the end. Covid prevented a good amount of that. Network had to stare at big gay 18 for six months, got cold feet. Thought about Walker, target audience and alienation of the rural areas if it went full gay. Misha quarantined and likely shot something (not much), he was then cut by execs and went home. They likely added in lines referencing Eileen and Cas to make it clear but more subtextual. They wrap, editing gets it and hacks it to pieces, so we get a shorter episode that’s mostly montages and jarringly bro-centric with nothing else. Arcs are left hanging. Dabb gets episode but it’s too late, there’s nothing he can do. Actors aren’t told so they can continue to do positive PR for the ending, they all found out at the same time we did: hence almost complete silence about the finale.

And you know what?  They warned us.  I talked about it here, but they’ve been telling us all season that Chuck wasn’t the writer, he’s the network.  I don’t think, still, that they thought it would be cut up like this, into something so unsalvageable that it’s been panned by almost everyone, even people who didn’t care much about Dean and Cas.

Finally, a masterpiece can be ruined by editing, and while I’m not sure even the script they ended up shooting on was a masterpiece (due to the network meddling already), but to me it’s blatantly obvious that it’s no one but the network that caused this, that took away closure for Dean, Cas, and even Sam.

So what do I want?  Nothing really, there’s nothing we can do, but I wrote this mostly to show people that the writers are not your enemy.   In fact, to the people trashing them?  You’re doing exactly what the CW wants you to: blame the obvious targets, blame Misha, blame Jensen and Jared, blame Dabb.  Scream and yell at them on Twitter and about how the show is ruined because of them.  The network keeps their engagement levels high, they don’t get as targeted for their behavior, and just keep moving along.

Just, please, think about who did this,  Mourn the show, be angry, but not at the people who fought tooth and nail for this for literal years, not the people who wanted it more than we did, not the people who cannot say anything because of their careers and the NDAs they’re bound by.

Someone is going to spill eventually, but until then, we just have to wait, and continue to be loud.

[jojikawa]

Mrs. Bucciarati | Bruno Bucciarati x Fem! Reader | JoJo's Bizarre Adventure

┊❥ Part 6 - Down Time

MASTERLIST

✧『Fandom』: JoJo's Bizarre Adventure

✧『Character』: Bruno Bucciarati

✧『Word Count』: 3,129 words 16,714 characters

✧『Summary』: The group kills time as they wait for Giorno and Mista to reach their destination.

The group quickly made its way back on the road to Venezia. Mista, Fugo, and Giorno were on the surface, driving the car while everyone else stayed inside to protect Trish as a second line of defense.

Inside the turtle, you had been sitting in between Narancia and Abbacchio. You had sat there first because Narancia wanted to show you something in the magazine he was reading but Abbacchio made it awkward by sitting next to you.

You had taken notice because previously, he was trying to avoid you.

Bruno was sitting on the other side of the table, his head tucked into the laptop that was used for communications. You wanted to talk but you felt like that would be distracting since he wanted to focus.

You didn’t know why but often, you would think of the first time the two of you met and the events that followed. You used to cringe at the memory of it but now that you were sure about your feelings towards him, it was wholesome.

One of your favorite memories with him was during a “charity” event your father held a few years ago. It wasn’t actually for anything charity-related.

Just another excuse to greet Italian capos. You hated it. You hated how corrupt your father was. He had a way of keeping investors while still doing dirty work.

Amongst them was Polpo from Passione in Italy and with him was a young Bruno Bucciarati. He was 17 at the time and you had just turned 16. Polpo agreed to take Bruno with him after much begging on his part. The boy just wanted to see you again.

That night, you were completely upset. Your father wanted you to sing since he and much of the staff agreed you had a nice singing voice. You were too nervous and honestly, you couldn’t even see yourself singing well at all. This upset him and he made you stay by him all night.

The ball was boring until Bruno had arrived. He found you quickly and wanted to talk. He figured that you were being held hostage by your father and wanted to help.

When we walked over, he cleared his throat. “Excuse me.” He said, grabbing your father’s attention. Your father had been speaking to a popular district attorney.

“It’s an honor to have been invited here, Mr. (l/n).” Bruno bowed, trying to seem as gentlemanly as possible.

Your father finished up his conversation before nodding the attorney away and taking a sip of his drink. “Oh, Bruno Bucciarati. I didn’t know Polpo was bringing you. I’m sure I only sent out one invitation.” Your father joked, even laughing when no one found it funny.

You just tried to tune him out, fiddling with your dress that was the same color as your father’s tuxedo.

Bruno humored him, laughing as well. “Well, you see, I couldn’t pass up the chance of hearing (y/n) sing so I had Polpo make room for one more.” His eyes lingered over to you. Bruno seemed so friendly and soft but he was tall for his age and it was almost intimidating…

You looked away, blushing after seeing the innocent twinkle in his eyes when he saw you were all dressed up. Normally, you were wearing loungewear since you were always inside. You looked so stunning!

“That’s too bad because little (y/n) over here decided that she didn’t want to help me pull any investors and she’s not singing at all tonight.” Your father lazily waved his hand in your direction, sipping more of his wine.

“I don’t believe I can sing. I’ve never had any lessons.” You spoke up for the first time. Your father narrowed his eyes at you. “Then after tonight, we’re getting you some.”

You sighed, looking away from your father and off to the side. This was so awkward… you wanted to leave.

Bruno saw what was unfolding and intervened before things could escalate.

“There’s nothing to worry about, Mr. (l/n). I’m sure (y/n) has an amazing voice. She’s just shy and there’s nothing wrong with that. Perhaps, I can help her build her confidence.” He offered his hand to you. You just stared at it.

Your father sighed. “I suppose so. I trust you, Bruno.”

Your father then let you spend the night with him and it was a lot better than just standing around.

All night, Bruno had been such a gentleman and even slow danced with you when no one was watching. You weren't very good and neither was he but you still found it enjoyable.

You had been reminiscing about the past when your thoughts were interrupted by Bruno who had been speaking to Abbacchio.

Bruno had gotten a message on the laptop asking Abbacchio to use his stand to reveal a message that was left behind.

Everyone had gathered around and you got up to look too.

Abbacchio decided to go back 15 hours. The person Moody Blues took the shape off was of the older man you had seen when you all first picked up Trish.

He explained more instructions for the team to follow. You felt so out of place. Everything about this was so bizarre. The moment you get to be with Bruno, you get wrapped up in some elaborate plan. You haven’t sat down with him since you arrived.

When you came to, you saw the image of Mr. Pericolo with a gun to his head. You had only zoned out for a moment! What happened?

Pericolo explained that because of his influence, the enemy knows that he’s helping Bruno deliver Trish. He isn’t a stand user so he doesn’t know how he could defend himself.

His only escape was killing himself before they got to him. It was tragic but these are things you sign up for in Passione.

He pulled the trigger and you saw red before Bruno hugged you to his chest and turned around to block the image of what you almost saw.

You tried to resist but he only held you tighter until the image of it was gone.

“Oh my god!!” You heard Narancia yell.

Trish and Abbacchio were speechless. You had wished that Bruno could’ve used his energy to protect the eyes of one of the children, especially Trish, but it was over now.

You wanted to cry but you were in so much shock. You felt like after everything was over, you would need some kind of therapy. It’s only been a few days and you’ve endured so much trauma. You were just a human.

“Bruno…” you tried to loosen his grip. “…let go.”

He squeezed you again when you had said his name but then without a word, he let go of you. He stood up to talk but his eyes were darkened and he was visibly sweating.

“Mr. Pericolo.”

You were dazed for a moment by his behavior but then you looked over at Trish who must have been traumatized.

You walked over and grabbed her hand. “I’m sorry that you had to see that. Are you okay?” You asked, sweetly. Her eyes darted over to you. She was shaking and sweating as well. It hurt you that she had to deal with all of this at such a young age.

“M-mhm.” She nodded and gave your hand a tight squeeze. “It’s going to be okay.” You told her.

You then realize that you would have to comfort Narancia, Fugo, and Giorno, as well. Being a mother figure wasn’t easy. You felt so obligated to be there for all of them but it was impossible.

You didn’t know how helpful Bruno was towards the younger members but you could only hope he took their mental health into account.

Before you could ask everyone about how they felt, Bruno had sent Mista and Giorno to drive while the rest of you stayed inside the turtle.

You couldn’t figure out why Bruno kept sheltering you. He wanted you by his side or inside the turtle at all times. You wanted to be able to help him protect everyone. You were tired of him acting like he could do everything on his own.

It was hard trying to get a good word in since everyone was in such close proximity. To everyone else, the way you and Bruno interacted was similar to parents. All of the kids had prominent parental issues so the two of you served as a support system when they needed it.

You were sitting next to Trish and you were unsure if you should give her space or make yourself available to speak to. You thought that maybe you should use this time to talk to Bruno but Trish had actually spoken first.

“Mrs. Bucciarati, what was your life like before you came here?” Her voice was pretty monotone as always but you could tell she was sad.

“My life? Well, I was pretty much a homebody. I just tended to my garden and practiced Italian.” You answered.

“Practicing Italian? Why?” She looked at you before realizing you weren’t a native Italian. It’s probably why your dialect sounded a bit different than most. You had a more formal way of speaking compared to the others.

“I’m from America and I know Bruno because I’m the daughter of a boss as well.” You explained with a smile. She didn’t reply to you. She just stared at you with her mouth opened a small bit. Maybe she could finally relate to someone.

You then turned your attention to Bruno who had been using the laptop. You were so worried about the boys. It didn’t feel right for you to send Mista and Giorno out on their own.

“Bruno.” You got up from your spot with Trish and went over to Bruno. You didn’t want to create a scene, so just in case things escalated, you spoke in English.

“I know you have faith in the boys, but is it really wise to send them out on their own? I could’ve gone with them.” You said down next to him, not really interested in what he was doing enough to look.

He just hummed before saying. “I don’t want you to be separated from me anymore. The last two times we got separated, you were hurt and every time we’ve been attacked, you were hurt.”

You huffed. “But you told me you were proud of me. You still don’t believe I can handle myself?”

“Cara mia, I know you can handle yourself but I just can’t have you hurt anymore. You were only taught to fight to a certain extent. If either of us makes a mistake then you could be killed.” His voice was firm. He’s never spoken to you in this tone before and it almost embarrassed you.

“But we have made mistakes. We both have. I’ve done my part in helping. I just still haven’t proven myself to you.” You turned away from him, upset that he was babying you and belittling the training you went through just for him.

Bruno look over at you who had been completely facing the other way. He reached over to your shoulder but you lightly jerked it away.

Why couldn’t you just understand that he was trying to protect you? Was it really wise to promise Giorno this ridiculous plan? Your first impression of Italy has just been filled with bloodshed. Although, if he didn’t then he never would have been Capo.

How long would it have taken him to reach the status of Capo normally?

Bruno pushed those thoughts out of his head. Maybe he was smothering you a little. It was just so hard not seeing you as a delicate flower anymore. He wished that he could’ve seen you more.

As an attempt to show affection, he reached out to your hand that has been free and resting on the sofa. The tips of his fingers brushed yours lightly but you had quickly curled them up, hiding them in a fist.

You didn’t seem to want to hold hands either.

Across the room, Fugo and Narancia were pondering on what you two could’ve been talking about. They didn’t know much English either. It was easy for the others to pay so much attention to you because of how new you were to them.

“Hey, Fugo, you know some English right? What do you think they’re talking about?” Narancia asked. “I’ve never seen Bucciarati so soft!” He hoarsely whispered into his ear.

Fugo, who was trying to rest his eyes, was getting annoyed at the boy. “No, Narancia, I don’t know what they’re saying. I’m not going to violate their privacy either. If it were meant for us to hear, then they wouldn’t have changed languages in the first place.” He explained. This made Narancia frown and retract himself.

You figured that maybe you should talk to Abbacchio for advice. You went over to the purple schemed man and Bruno’s eyes followed you curiously.

He watched as you talked to Leone with confidence and not anything at all like he expected. At first, when you first met them in Naples, he could sense your fear for that man but now you didn’t seem like you were at all.

“Leone,” You sighed and his head snapped over to you. You jumped at his reaction. “A-Abbacchio, I mean, sorry.” You raised your hands in defense and began to sweat. His neutral expression didn’t change. Deep down he didn’t mind your voice saying his name.

“As Bruno always called the shots this way? Sending the children out?” You asked softly.

This annoyed Abbacchio but still, his expression didn’t change. Of course, you would want to talk to him about Bruno of all people. Since you’ve been here, it’s just been about you and him and can’t even last 2 minutes apart when you’re just a foot away from him.

He knew that the only reason he felt this way was that he was jealous. He was probably just jealous of Bucciarati the whole time. What would it take for him to get a woman like you?

“Yeah. Always been that way.” He replied. “They know that they’re doing. Nothing new.”

A small gasp left your mouth. Everyone seemed so uncaring of the safety of the boys. But this didn’t have to mean the end.

You just had to be strong enough to protect them yourself. “I see.” That was all you had said. You didn’t care if it didn't seem like Bruno had faith in you or that there were so many children or how nonchalant Leone was about it. You had a stand too and you knew how to use it.

“Th-That’s all.” You smiled nervously before giving the man his space. You scooted further away, not wanting to move around too much and irritate everyone.

When you looked up, you saw that Bruno was just staring at you, watching. He looked upset but not angry. You wanted to comfort him but you were still upset with him. You’ve worked so hard and it’s like it doesn’t even matter to him.

For some hours, you occupied yourself with a magazine. You tested yourself by reading Italian fashion articles and keeping notes of things you wanted to buy with Bruno’s money. You made sure to bookmark pages with nice shoes and dresses you’d like to try on.

Your actions were interrupted by feeling a portion of the couch next to you sink. You looked to your left to see it was Bruno with the computer resting on his lap. He didn’t say a word and only shifted his weight so that his thigh was touching your exposed one.

This made you blush, so hard that physically acknowledged that he had done this when his goal was to be smooth with it.

“B-Bruno-” You whispered. Bruno ignored you, resting a free hand on the thigh closest to him. He leaned over, so close that the message you got was that he was trying to kiss you.

Really? In front of everyone? What’s gotten into him?

“Are you upset with me?” He whispered into your ear.

Your face heated up. You would feel his breath hitting your ear.

“N-No.” You replied, turning your head to him.

His eyes were narrowed and his face frowned. He leaned in further but he didn’t kiss you. He…licked your face?!

You yelped, breaking contact with him. What the hell was that!?

“To me, it seems like you’re lying.”

“Huh? Is this that lie detection thing you told me about? I thought that was a joke…” You wiped the faint sign of saliva on your face. “Warn me next time, okay?”

He chuckled before kissing you softly. “I thought it would cheer you up.” He said in between breaths.

You kissed back tenderly, your cheeks burning at his actions. Was this a dream?

Your minor make-out session was cut short when Narancia had brought you both back to reality.

Butterflies grew inside of you as you covered your face and turned away. You were always such a shy and delicate flower and now he knew that he could tease you with a public display of affection.

Narancia had been volunteering to be the one to go out to be on the surface so that he could use Aureo Smith to find Mista and Giorno.

You parted from Bruno, enjoying the remaining time just leaning against him. His body was warm and his cologne was faint with a hint of sweat from all the intense fighting.

You were an odd couple but the love was undeniable.

Mista and Giorno were found. Mista had sustained a lot of injuries, which the blonde male healed with his stand.

You played your role and scolded Mista at his lack of awareness to which he replied by calling you “Mom.”

“You should be more careful. You can’t always expect your wounds to be fixed. Giorno can’t help you forever!” You tapped his forehead aggressively.

“Hey, Hey! Yeah, I get it, okay, mom?” He swatted your hand away. This made you giggle.

“Mom? Where’d that come from?” You asked, chuckling to yourself.

“ ‘Cause, you’re annoying like one.” He yelled at you with faint pink dust on his cheeks.

You were the first female figure in his life that worried about him the way you did. It was very easy for them to get attached to you since they were all from broken homes.

It has only been a few days but with Bruno’s tough love and your soft and gentle nature, you two were scaffolding for what having parents was like. Minus the killing of the mafioso members pursuing you, of course.

It was unfortunate that such a cute “family” would come to an end.

[meltwonu]

| 🍒 CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB! 🍒 |     [CHAPTER 20] FINAL

pairing; dom!seungcheol x camgirl!reader

this chapter’s notes; camshow, sex toys, shibari, dom!seungcheol, dirty talk, overstimulation/forced orgasms, squirting, degradation, name calling, daddy!kink, gags! 😍💕 ✨HAPPY NEW YEAR!!✨ Here’s to more fun fics in 2021! I can’t believe this is our last chapter though omg 😭 It’s been suuuuch a journey and a privilege to write this little series out! I’ve honestly thought about a camgirl/boy series for like, over a year now, and I’m glad I finally did it! I completed one of my goals! 🥺💕 2020 was definitely a wild one, but I want to thank you all so fuckin’ much for supporting me and stickin’ it out with me all year! Here’s to more in the coming year!💕 Also I was proofreading this at the dining table last night thinking my roommate wouldn’t come out of their room but they did(while I was making dinner and my hands were dirty so I couldnt close my laptop ☠️) and they walked past my laptop and now I’m convinced they saw my fucking smut fic right in the open so yes my little mini-break next week is MUCH needed cause I am ✨embarrassed✨ 🤣 I’ll still do my inbox roundup tomorrow and probably answer a bunch of small thirst posts ‘n stuff throughout the week but there won’t be any drabbles! For now, enjoy chapter 20 🥺, have a safe weekend, and remember that I love you~ ❤️🍒💕

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 COMPLETE

Seungcheol wakes up much earlier than you do the next morning; pressing a kiss to your forehead as you groan and snuggle deeper into your pillow.

“Baby, I need to go run some errands for a little bit, okay? Just keep sleeping, you don’t need to get up yet. But, I made breakfast and put it in the microwave for you when you decide to get up later.”

His voice is muffled and you can barely understand what he’s saying but you nod; a soft sigh on your lips when you drift back into dreamland. He takes his time getting ready, checking his phone notifications as he gets dressed and places a note on the nightstand knowing that you didn’t catch a single word he said.

‘Hey, did you get everything I asked for?’

Jimin🧍🏻: of course, who do you think I am? Jeongguk?

Jimin🧍🏻: and btw, i’m just giving you a crash course okay? We don’t really have a ton of time

Jimin🧍🏻: did you watch those tutorial videos I sent you?

‘Yeah, I did some practice on my breaks, but I guess you can tell me if I’m doing anything wrong.’

Jimin🧍🏻: okee, i’ll be waiting. Don’t get here too late!

‘I’ll be otw soon. Thanks again, Jimin.’

“Ow--damn, okay, you don’t need to tug on it so much!”

“Sorry, I’ll be careful! And why are we practicing on you anyway?! Couldn’t you just have shown me pictures or something?”

“How else will you learn if not on an actual body? It doesn’t work the same way, Seungcheol.” Jimin pauses, checking himself in the mirror. “Also, keep in mind she does have boobs so just… go slow, okay? It’s not gonna sit like this on her.”

Seungcheol blushes a crimson red; biting the inside of his cheek at how amateur he was at this.

“Okay…”

Seungcheol is gone for a lot longer than you anticipate and although he replies quickly to your texts, you can’t help but be curious about where he’d gone and what he was doing.

Especially knowing that the two of you had to film tonight and knowing that everything was up to Seungcheol.

A shiver rolls down your body at the thought and you quickly try to shake off the nerves that seem to slowly invade your body when your mind starts to wander.

“It’ll be fine, I’m sure…”

“I’m home!”

“Where have you--oh, that’s… a b-big box? Um, should I be concerned...”

Seungcheol grins, shrugging as he sets it onto the kitchen counter. “Just some supplies for tonight. I had to go pick them up from a friend but I had to make sure everything was right.” He notices the way you can’t seem to take your eyes off of the box; eyes twinkling when he makes his way towards you.

He tilts your head up to meet his in a searing kiss, lips easing into a smile when you wrap your arms around his neck and melt under his touch. You moan against his lips just before he pulls away; staring dreamily at him while his hands start to roam over your clothed body.

“We have a long night ahead of us, sweetheart. Let’s pamper you a little before then, hmm?”

j__min: ??? where’s the loverboy

j__min has donated $200

angelhan has donated $75

therealchan99 has donated $50

xcaliburDK has donated $75

xcaliburDK: is that the sybian? Haven’t seen that in a looong while

You bite your lip and nod, somewhat shy as you sit alone in front of the camera. “Seungcheol’s still… setting up but he told me to start! I’m a little nervous, to be honest…” Your eyes flit to Seungcheol who rummages through the box in the kitchen and from the angle you’re sat in, you can’t see a single thing he takes out.

Earlier, he’d cooked you your favorite meal and even took the time to give you a full body massage before the two of you cuddled on the sofa and watched a movie. To you, it seemed a little too suspiciously tame and you only found yourself more nervous when he made you drink two glasses of water and ever so quietly announced it was time to start getting ready for the camshow.

“He’s being so suspicious! He was even gone for a few hours earlier today…” You mumble; brows furrowed at the camera before checking the comments.

It still amazed you every time with how much money you and Seungcheol made from the camshows and videos and it made you feel even better knowing that everyone loved the chemistry the two of you had together. There were a lot of video requests and ideas mixed in with the comments at any given time and you were definitely ready to pitch some to Seungcheol now that you’d rebranded your channel to be a couple’s channel instead.

“Almost done, sweetheart!”

gc__koo: he told me to watch cuz he was being suspicious with me too 

gc__koo has donated $50

alphagyu97: what is he even plotting

alphagyu97: i am excited to see the sybian again tho ngl

artist8hao: pretty baby gonna squirt for us again?

universe_WZ: hell fuckin yea let us see how fuckin wrecked you get on that machine

You feel your pussy clench around emptiness at their comments; already feeling yourself getting wetter and wetter with the anticipation.

Movement out of the corner of your eye catches your attention and Seungcheol walks towards the bed with a wide smile and the same box in hand. “Ready?” You can only nod back slowly, watching as he dumps the contents of the box right next to your body.

gc__koo: oy

chwenon: oh shit

sleepy_wonu: oh baby, you’re in for it now

sleepy_wonu has donated $100

Your entire body fills with warmth as you look over the various objects; unsure of where to really look first. “I, um--”

A stack of red ropes sits next to a small bullet vibrator that sits next to a ball gag that sits next to a pair of EMT shears and your eyes immediately flit up to Seungcheol who only smirks back at your shocked expression. “I had some other toys I wanted to use but I figured I should go easy on you, y’know? Since you showed me some mercy last night.”

Nodding, you reach out towards the ropes, touching them shyly. “Why red?”

“Thought they’d be on theme for you, babygirl.”

Seungcheol takes his time; remembering Jimin’s words when he tugs the ropes around your wrists.

“Colour, babygirl?”

“G-green… daddy…”

He nods, sitting up on his knees behind you as you sit on the sybian and face the camera. You bite your lip, somewhat embarrassed that you were already soaking the toy underneath you as Seungcheol worked to bind your arms behind you.

“D--daddy, where did you l-learn this?” You whisper, somewhat curious if this had anything to do with why he was gone for so long earlier in the day.

“Mm, daddy’s friend Jimin was kind enough to help me get the tools and teach me a few tricks to make sure I kept my babygirl safe. Wasn’t that kind of him?” You nod gently, gulping when you shift atop the machine slightly in hopes of relieving some of the growing sexual tension in your body. “Why don’t you thank him properly, sweetheart?”

Your hazy eyes make eye contact with the camera, head tilted slightly. “T-thank you, J-Jimin… for--for helping daddy…”

j__min: omg a shoutout ive made it

kitty_junjun: we never thought we’d see the day

tangerine_kwan: and here we all thought you were gonna be the bad guy huh

hoshi_tiger_xx: like when u only see previews of the book online but the rest of it is different ykwim

Seungcheol makes sure your arms are bound snug enough but not too tight; leaning away slightly to admire his rope work. “Feeling okay so far, babygirl?”

Nodding, you whine back slightly. “Y-yes, daddy… But… my--my pussy wants s-something…” He laughs in return, readjusting so that he’s sitting on your side this time to give himself easier access to start the rest of the bindings.

“Is that so? You’re gonna have to be a little more patient this time ‘cause daddy’s not done yet.” He starts working on the rest of the harness; going slow and checking in with you often to make sure none of the ropes were digging into your skin or making you uncomfortable. “You’ll have to forgive me a little though, I’m admittedly a ‘lil inexperienced so our pretty babygirl is only going to be tied up in this pretty harness for tonight.”

gentleman_josh95: the fact u even took the time to learn just for her

gentleman_josh95 has donated $100

artist8hao: seriously, the dedication

kitty_junjun: we stan a man who knows safety and etiquette 

Comments of reassurance and donations flood in at Seungcheol’s small apology and although the two of you are in your own world; you can tell from just the amount of pings coming from your laptop that they all seemed to be encouraging him.

The two of you fall into a comfortable silence as Seungcheol continues to move around you on the bed to finish the harness and a smile graces his lips when he starts to secure the last knots in the back. He can’t help but mentally pat himself on the back at how neatly he’d done it for his first time.

“There. All done, baby.”

Your eyes flit to the laptop’s screen to see yourself; cheeks hot when you see how fucked out you already look and he hadn’t even touched you properly or turned on the machine.

The star harness Seungcheol had tied looks pretty with red ropes and you can’t hide your smile at how good it looks on you too either. “Ah, daddy made it really p-pretty… Thank you.”

This time, Seungcheol nods, letting you admire yourself as he silently reaches for the small remote for the sybian, switching it on.

Your entire body lurches forward as soon as the vibrations attack your clit and you immediately find yourself moaning and grinding down onto the machine as he gives you some relief.  

“You’re welcome, babygirl. Now let’s really have some fun, huh?”

You need to cum.

Badly.

“Awww, is my pretty baby drooling? Does it feel that good on your sensitive ‘lil clit?” He teases, smoothing down your hair as you cry around the ball gag in your mouth; drool seeping out from the side of your lips when he raises the vibrations a setting higher.

You don’t know how many times he’d played with the settings and edged you by now, but all you do know is that the urge to cum only grows stronger as you grind against the machine, soaking it with your wetness as you chase the pleasure building up in your body again.  

Surely cumming was okay, right? He never said you couldn’t.

You whimper around the ball gag, eyes fluttering shut when the tension in your body snaps in the blink of an eye and your thighs clamp down onto the sides of the machine. Throwing your head back, you moan against the gag and ride out your high as Seungcheol watches you from the side.

“Mm, bet that felt good, huh? But I know you want something in that greedy ‘lil cunt of yours, don’t you? You want daddy’s cock slamming into your tight ‘lil hole ‘til it’s full of my cum, right, sweetheart?” He licks his lips, turning off the sybian as you slump forward.

universe_WZ: shit shes so sensitive

chwenon: especially with her arms bound like that i bet she’s on cloud nine rn

gentleman_josh95: her cute lil head is probably all fuzzy already from all the sensations

therealchan99 has donated $100

gc__koo has donated $75

j__min has donated $150

All you can do is whimper and nod; teary eyes blinking back at Seungcheol as he smirks and leans in towards you.

“Mmm, you’ll get what you want eventually. But for now, you’re gonna cum again.”

He turns the sybian back on, licking his lips when he sees your body tensing again. It was always easier to get you to cum a second time and his point is proven when you mewl around the ball gag a few minutes later; chest heaving in stuttered breaths as you try to shy away from the toy still vibrating against your overly sensitive clit when you’re quickly thrown into another orgasm.

“You always cum for daddy so easily, don’t you, babygirl?”

Your head feels fuzzy after already cumming twice in such a short span of time but you nod, head lolling to the side as Seungcheol finally turns the sybian off for good.

Seungcheol gives you a second to catch your breath before he’s scooting in and fiddling with the clasps at the back of your head to take the ball gag off.

A thread of saliva connects your lips to the gag and you whimper at how good it feels to be able to actually speak again. “D-daddy…” Drool drips from your mouth as your lead lolls forward and Seungcheol is quick to bring a hand up to keep your head up as he looks into your lust filled eyes.

“Colour, sweetheart?”

“Still g-green…” He nods back, checking to make sure none of the ropes had shifted. “Would you like some water before we continue, baby?”

“Yes, daddy…”

He fetches you a glass of water, tilting it against your lips as you down the entire glass and you find yourself a little surprised at how needed it was. “Thank you, d-daddy…”

“You’re welcome, babygirl. Ready to keep going?”

You nod, a little bit more energized. “I hope everyone, mmh, l-likes the show so f-far~” Your teary vision prevents you from reading the comments and before you can even make an effort to, Seungcheol is already helping you off of the machine and helping you sit on the bed across from him.

alphagyu97: ugh she looks so fucking good in that harness

angelhan: right? That shade of red looks so good against her skin too

angelhan: so fuckin pretty

tangerine_kwan: pics for the private room later? Plz i beg

Seungcheol takes this time to take off his boxer briefs, cock curving up against his abdomen when he’s fully naked across from you. He wraps a hand around his cock, moaning and spreading the precum down his shaft as you watch. “D’you want this, baby?”

Your lips fall open in a silent moan as you watch Seungcheol jerk himself off and you can’t help but squirm. “Y-yes…”

“Tell me exactly what you want then. Let them hear what a filthy little slut you are for me.” You can’t help but feel miserably empty watching him and despite having already cum twice, you want his cock fucking you open and making you cum again.

“I--I--”

“Yes, babygirl?”

“I, ngh, I want d-daddy’s cock… Please? Ah, I--I wanna feel you fucking my--my pussy into the, mmh, s-shape of your c-cock… And I w-want you to c-cum inside my--my slutty little h-hole…”

Seungcheol scoffs, hips shallowly thrusting up into his enclosed fist. “That’s right. You’re just my slutty ‘lil babygirl that lets me use all her tight holes how I please, right? You like it when I cum down your throat and in your pretty ‘lil ass. But we all know you like it best when I cum in your hot ‘lil cunt. Makes you feel all warm and full, doesn’t it? You like it when my cum is dripping out of your spent cunt and sliding down your shaky thighs.” This time you nod furiously as you whine back in response.

“P-please… Can’t wait any--anymore!”

This time, the impatience takes over as you slightly tug on the ropes; whining when they don’t give. “Daddy!”

And this time, he gives in quicker than he anticipates, growling as he reaches for the EMT shears to cut you from the harness. “Don’t let your arms down, no matter how much you want to. You’re going to strain your arms if you move too fast so let me handle it, okay, sweetheart?”

The sudden gentleness in his voice has a giddy warmth pouring over you as you nod and sit still while he cuts at various points of the harness to make the ropes fall loose around your arms and chest. You keep your arms in the same position like he requested and you soon feel his hands roaming your skin and massaging your arms to get the blood flowing again.

“You’re so good for me, baby.” He whispers against your hair, leaning down to kiss your shoulder before he slowly easing your arms down from being folded behind your back.

He continues to massage your arms for a few more minutes before it’s you that’s getting impatient. “Daddy… Can you fuck me now?” Whispering, you slightly turn your body to the side to meet his gentle stare.

Seungcheol laughs under his breath, nodding. “Lay on your back for me, legs spread.”

You follow his orders as you quickly scramble to get into position; legs spread wide for him to situate himself between.

“Mm, your pussy is still so fuckin’ wet. I wanna taste you on my tongue, baby.” Whines spill from your lips as you shake your head ‘no.’

“No! My p-pussy feels empty, I need y-your cock, daddy… ‘n I’m so wet, you can probably, ah, just s-slide your cock in…”

He wraps a hand around his cock just as you wrap your legs around his waist and he guides himself until the head of his cock is right at your entrance.

Neither of you say a word as he slowly starts to sink his cock in; guttural moans on his lips when he meets no resistance and bottoms out in a singular thrust. “Holy fuck, your cunt is so fuckin’ wet. Shit, and so t-tight!” You clench around him, already feeling good with his cock inside of you as you beg him to fuck you hard and fast.

“Ngh, p-please fuck me like--like I’m your, hah, c-cocksleeve… I want it f-fast, daddy!”

He grits his teeth at your words; drawing his hips back before snapping them into you just how you wanted. “Fast, hmm? All you think about in that pretty head of yours is my cock pounding you open, huh? Slamming into you so fuckin’ good, it makes your toes curl when you cum.”

Seungcheol starts a quick pace, already feeling the pleasure building up for himself when you’re reduced to garbled noises and broken cries of his name. The heels of your feet dig into the small of his back as you try to press him in closer and he’s quick to reach for the small bullet vibrator left on the bed next to your body.

“Your body is so fuckin’ sensitive, I can already feel how tight you’re getting around me. So fuckin’ greedy to cum too. Already came twice and you still want more. You’re not satisfied until your whole body is shaking underneath me, huh, sweetheart?” He turns the small toy on, pressing it to your clit as you yelp and let out choked sobs.

“Ah, ngh, d-daddy, my--my clit’s t-too sen--sensitive! I--I can’t--!” Squirming, you feel the pressure building up obscenely quick; bottom lip quivering when he takes one of your free hands and makes you hold the toy to your swollen clit.

“Just a little more, sweetheart. Don’t you wanna cum?”

He angles his thrusts to graze against your g-spot and loud cries of his name leave your lips in a hurried, jumbled mess when he only doubles his pace.

The sound of donations and comments pour in like water and get lost within the ringing in your ears; unable to even warn Seungcheol that you’re about to cum when you feel your entire body starting to lock up underneath him.

Your lips part in a silent scream and your back bows off of the bed, thighs shaking uncontrollably as you cum for the third time. Seungcheol growls, fucking you through it as you squirt all over his lower half.  He finds it harder and harder to thrust into you as you cum, but he feels himself quickly following suit with your warm walls fluttering around his cock.

“Fuck, baby, that’s right. Squirt for me, get me fuckin’ soaked while you cum.” He uses a free hand to make sure you keep the toy pressed to your clit, growling when he starts to unload his cum inside of you. “Mmh, gonna fill your cunt up with what you want, baby.”

A shaky moan leaves your lips as you feel him throbbing inside your pussy; walls clamped down onto him in a vice grip as you ride out the remnants of your orgasm.

“Ah, d-daddy’s cumming suh--so much inside of my p-pussy…”

Whining, you feel Seungcheol’s grip on your hand give way as he rides out his pleasure and you take the opportunity to turn off the small bullet vibrator while he doesn’t notice.

You watch his face contort in pleasure, hips still shallowly thrusting into you as his entire body shivers above you.

“D-daddy’s so h-handsome...” You mumble, cheeks hot when he cracks a smile through the pleasure wracking his body and chuckles under his breath. 

“Thank you, babygirl.” 

After you end the show, Seungcheol makes sure to cuddle with you on the bed for a little while longer.

“One more glass of water, baby.” You whine in response, pouting up at him before he gets up from the soaked sheets. 

“But I already had a glass! If you have a piss kink just say so, ‘Cheol!”

He lets out a boisterous laugh at your comment, trudging back to the bed from the kitchen with another glass of water for you. “You need to be hydrated, sweetheart. You came three times and we played a little more rough today. I just wanna make sure you’re okay.” 

“Fine, but you didn’t deny my comment.” You snarkily reply, taking the glass from him as you down the water. 

“Don’t make me have to punish you again! I’ll have you know I still need to get you all washed up and change the bed--”

A faint pinging has the two of you turning to the laptop; still on your camming homepage from where you’d checked the revenues from tonight’s show. 

A small [1] sits above your inbox and Seungcheol is quick to turn to you with an eyebrow raised. “I thought you turned off the messaging system on your profile?” 

You tilt your head in confusion, handing him the emptied glass. “I did. The only messages I should get are from, like, the actual system admins or other creator accounts which, I haven’t received any ‘til... now, I guess?”

Seungcheol sets the glass down onto the nightstand before he takes a seat next to you, dragging the laptop closer as you go to check the notification. 

“’Love&Letter Films’? Aren’t they one of the biggest adult film companies?” Mumbling, you click on the message, giving yourself and Seungcheol a second to process the message that stares back at you; a shocked smile on your lips.

‘Hello!

I hope this message finds Cherry and Seungcheol well. 

We, at ‘Love&Letter Films’, have really enjoyed the shows and videos from your channel throughout the years and we really have enjoyed watching the growth of your channel and the addition of Seungcheol to it. The dynamics between the two of you are rare in this industry and we’ve yet to see anyone like the two of you in this market. 

The shows from the last two nights have proven that the two of you have the right kind of chemistry to film together for bigger productions and we would love to hire you for a few film productions we have planned in the upcoming weeks as a feeler. Of course, all expenses paid by us if you would kindly take our offer. 

We love the various scenes and roles that the two of you take on with ease and we would love to help propel your careers forward, should you pursue a career in the adult entertainment industry. 

Please don’t hesitate to contact me as I’ve listed my contact information below. I’m excited to hear from the two of you and hope to work with you in the future on many projects.

Respectfully, 

Kwon Soonyoung, L&L FILMS CEO’