#when the observed online stuff could be its own posts!

[nori-the-cat]

a bit of a long ramble but

I'e been observing and following kpop on and off for some time because theres really not much other music out rn besides whatever is mainstream and even that doesnt always interest me enough. but I just wonder why so much of kpop has been so dramatic lately? lkke in these past few years online drama seems to increase surrounding idols especially and what idols do in their personal life doesnt need to be shared online like wtf and it just seems like every small thing for kpop groups tend to become big drama or their fans make it big drama all the time. thats why i watch from afar these days cause it seems anyone can have negative thing to say abt anyone whos in the kpop entertainment. even if there is some good things abt kpop music, overall it doesnt paint it in good light cause it make their fans seem like a pack of wild vultures who watch their idols like hawkes or ppl who cant seem to mind their business or let idols roam freely in their spare time cause smartphones seem to mean ppl can shove them in the idols face esp at airports.

its just kind of tiring most of the time like if people just liked it for the songs it wouldnt be so bad instead it seems to be one extreme or the other. i dont blame idols for never saying who they date bc look at what happened to karina and the actor. social media just spoils the fun of something and makes it into something else enitrely where its now often filled with dramas or toxic behaviours idfk whatever ppl post towards idols it only for them to get more negative reactions. i wouldnt be surprised if most idols are already dating but when it seem to get leaked in the media then ppl who are their fans act like it end of the world. i think the problem isnt social media itself but more so smartphones bc ppl who are more their hard core stans, i guess is the right word, they might go to extremes and they keep showing that extreme behaviour any time something doesnt sit right with them. like one minute the idol can be worshipped and next they can be tarnished so they cant really win anymore.

when ppl say that kpop is becoming westernised i only think thats in the sense of them adding foreigners nowadays to the groups, but the groups and their fans are still very much particular towards things like in 2024 i didnt expect idols dating to still be considered a scandal? whereas in the west they date who they want or idfk adult idols going out to clubs and drinking seem to surprise some folk. even the stuff in the media dont surprise me anymore cause it no a big deal to me at least. honestly with the way their fans behave online and irl towards idols theres one thing im glad abt and that is i will never have to deal with them or knetz lol.

its shame bc theres still so much kpop could bring to music but its so formatted and rigid or set in its ways of doing things. the other thing is they arent debuting older age idols who may have more life experiences and they may be more mentally prepared to handle such fans behaviours or they might have different style vocals and so on, so with that in mind im like its so awkward and horrible to even watch the way much younger idols get treated or mistreated, i should say, by their own fans and maybe by other adults that they work with.

other than whatever is mainstream there doesnt seem to be market for my age group anymore cause in kpop theyre debuting them too young and ik they always done that but it still feels weird to me to like a group whos 4/5/6 years younger than myself. id have loved an other group like btob or a smaller version of exo but nowadays it seems groups have nearly 30 smth members in them and they usually have to be quite young :/ if ateez had been my age it would seal the deal but i dont even care too deeply for them either its just once in awhile sort of thing i will like their songs why does it always have to be more than that?

like im no going to go doolally about every group nowadays either for this reason that my generation seems to be getting left out of a lot of things to do with kpop. like i honestly really feel old these days esp when i look at an idol and theyre like a 99liner or 00liner :O and kpop probs now considers 20 year olds too old as well :( fomo sets in too when u dont particularly care deeply abt dance challenges or latest internet fads cause i rather just like a group for their songs or their talent than their looks or their group position / personality whatever its called

lastly whoever date or marry bts i honestly feel so bad for them like they going to get so much media attention and their fans wont like it either so the internet will descend into more chaos when they marry if they arent already secretly married that is. it really sometimes often feels like the beatles but with the internet involved its 100x more crazy no matter the group it always has bunch of crazies who seem to twke it way too far

sorry for my long ramble

GUUUUUURRRRL please don’t be sorry for your long ramble. I had similar thoughts as you but I have come to terms with it, especially when I’m the same age as NCT 127 Jungwoo things in K-pop music has become less enjoyable too. Hence, I don’t know much about newer groups or groups outside of my interests ㅠ ㅠ

You also pointed out how fans can idolise their idols and drop them the next minute when they’re “wrong”, for example going to the club, dating, and having a life basically. I think all of this is the company’s fault. Take SM for example, I’m not comfortable in the direction that RIIZE is going with the booheju (girlfriend stan) stuff, but it’s what it makes money? Because of this, I’ve slowly detaching myself from them and only like their songs and I have one particular member that I like, he is Lee Sohee. I also like him because of his singing skill and that’s all.

Overall, I agree with you. Tbh it’s the parasocial relationship that is an issue. Some fans seeks comfort from their idol and the idol gives them that. However, often they forget that an idol job stops when they’re behind the camera. They have a life too. So, I’m with you on this too. I have started to like a group for their song and less about what is trendy or their looks and personality. Girl groups wise I’m into Aespa, NewJeans and BabyMonster. Their songs are right up my alley. Now, the younger idols debuting is a problem in it of itself. But this has happened way before in Kpop. Take Taemin for example, or NCT Dream Jisung. I think the main reason is that the younger they are, the easier to “manipulate” them or influence them. I guess if a company debuts someone above 25 years old, they’re going to have a hard time dealing with them because their pre-frontal cortex has developed.

that’s my easiest bet! 🤡

I’m also not Korean so I can’t say for certain this is true. However, I’m Asian. I realise Asian people put so much emphasis on good character. Because of this, idols are seen as role models and they are constantly judged and put on a pedestal. It’s kinda sad really. So, take Seunghan for example, whether his rumours are true or not. His scandal has been a huge part of his idol career and to some, it could look like there is no going back. In terms of fan wars, I think people on the internet are just bored or mean. Most fan wars started by some troll or a fan who likes to compare other idols. I don’t know much about fan wards but this is what I noticed. I’m pretty sure if BTS gets married, it is during the time of their life where they are not at their “prime”. That way is easier for them to be accepted by their fans and the South Korean. Take, Ryewook from Super Junior. He got married recently and the fans seem fine. But ofc, we can’t exclude the obsessive fans. I’m sure idols realise they have obsessive fans. In general, I’m pretty sure idols knows their consequences and downsides to being an idol. We as fans also have full control of our interests. The only thing becoming Westernised in kpop is the song and not the culture. 🤡

[legendaryprofessorwisteria]

Hello professor! Do you have any general care tips for darkrai? They’ve always been my favorite Pokémon in general, and I was looking into having one in the future!

Hello! As it happens, I do and I'm happy to share them! Cut because long post, whoops.

Overall, Darkrai is actually a great choice for a Mythical Pokemon. I didn't put it on the Beginner Legendary list because of the whole nightmare powers thing, but that's not so bad if you have Lunar Wings and/or a good tolerance for scary dreams.

Lunar Wings are available online or from pretty much anyone with a Cresselia, as they shed pretty frequently. There are a lot of knockoffs, but a real Lunar Wing will last forever as long as it's not damaged - still, it's worth buying several. I wouldn't recommend shelling out for an unusually colored Lunar Wing, because those are more likely to be knockoffs and don't make any difference.

Don't put a Lunar Wing on a Darkrai. It will completely suppress their nightmare powers, but that's not healthy for it, and can cause illness, lethargy, or even pain. Only do it temporarily if you HAVE to, which should be rare.

Fun fact: Most Darkrai can't actually present nightmares that are frightening to the individual, but rather prey on common fears such as monsters, humiliation, the dark, death, and similar. Nightmares that target uncommon fears or an individual's personal fears are the mark of a well-trained Darkrai. This also means that if you don't suffer from the most common fears, you'll probably be unaffected!

Part of receiving an individual license for a Darkrai is being intentionally targeted by nightmare powers, both from a Darkrai with average and honed nightmare powers. Bringing a Lunar Wing to the exam, while technically cheating, is considered a sign of good planning and good humor unless you actually try to be sneaky about it.

Darkrai are naturally solitary, but quite like socializing with Pokemon that aren't of their own species (Darkrai shouldn't be kept together unless they're family or already get along well). Most Pokemon naturally avoid Darkrai but can be acclimated to them fairly easily.

For the safety of you/other Pokemon and Darkrai's comfort, having a dark spot they can retreat to, specifically for them, is great.

Darkrai tend to enjoy puzzle cubes/similar toys for Pokemon with simplistic but workable hands. They also have some degree of psychic power, meaning enrichment stuff aimed at Psychic Pokemon can be enjoyable for them.

The best way to train a Darkrai to be careful with its nightmare powers is not to scold them for using said powers, but to reward them when they don't - especially in a frightening or overstimulating situation. Most Darkrai won't have much trouble with this.

Darkrai don't like a lot of bright lights or noise, and tend to be nocturnal or crepuscular (active at dawn and dusk). The ideal Trainer to match a Darkrai's usual personality would be a fairly quiet, not overly extroverted night owl.

Thanks to not being huge, Darkrai don't need a ton of space as long as they have a quiet place to hang out in. Similarly, their habitat needs are fairly minimal and they're not territorial beyond the desire for a small space of their own. If I make a list of Legendary/Mythical Pokemon you could ethically keep in an average apartment, Darkrai would be on it.

Darkrai need an average of six to seven and a half hours of sleep per day, but this varies upward (rarely lower) depending on their health, age, diet, and other factors. They also nap frequently.

Darkrai love to observe things. They will stare at you. A lot. It can be creepy.

Darkrai are omnivorous, but also feed off of dreams and negative energy like Shuppet, Drowzee, or Munna do. This means that Trainers who work well with their Darkrai usually report a calmer, more relaxed mental state with the odd nightmare. That's not a reason not to be careful, Darkrai nightmares can be extremely upsetting to some people (I myself couldn't train a Darkrai because I don't handle that well), but overall Darkrai aren't a drain on mental health...contrary to popular opinion.

Darkrai get slandered hard in a lot of media and public opinion. While there was that fantastic movie set in Alamos Town a while ago, most portrayals of Darkrai paint them as unsympathetic at best and their nightmare powers give them an awful reputation. As such, prepare for scrutiny from your neighbors, friends, or family - or even strangers. People will absolutely try to make your Pokemon their business.

Darkrai are in reality quite relaxed, nonaggressive Pokemon and 90% of the time, if threatened, they will give you a nightmare and book it. Some people expecting a scary, dark Pokemon actually end up disappointed because the majority of Darkrai are so chill.

[ikemenomegas]

So its established that the alpha is the one that keeps their silence when things get hard right? but then in the nightmare piece, megumi was the first one to notice that the alpha had a nightmare and wasn't in the right state of mind. And that gave me a thought, megumi noticing that they had a nightmare obv wasn't the first time so i headcanon that when megumi was still a child, whenever the alpha was depressed and needed comfort but shut up abt it to avoid troubling satoru more, megumi was the first to notice and comforted the alpha in his own megumi way like sending one of his divine dogs to play with the alpha

Just to clarify, I don't think the alpha is necessarily unique in the way they deal with difficulties! Most of sorcerer society is like this. Some people are lucky to have someone with whom to share their difficulties, but when they lose that person (like Nanami did), they go silent.

Gojo and Getou were that person for each other, but even then they never got to have that supportive relationships as adults, never learned to seek it out (understandable when you realize they don't consider anyone else their equal), and they seldom seemed to talk about what was bothering them head-on even as students (see the argument Shoko runs away from in the flashback arc). I can only speak to my experiences with the east asian part of my family, but that's pretty typical anyways. It takes trust and you still have to entice your loved ones into telling you what's up to them. It's not uncommon to get just as much information from careful observation as from an actual conversation. (Gojo actually doesn't say much either - he knows there are bad situations you can do nothing about, and in those cases sometimes the most you can do is just be there with someone in the shit)

Also, here's another old jjk fandom joke for you: that these people thought [single] parenthood at about 17-18 would fix them. The odd age gap between Megumi and the adults that inserted themselves into his life is part of what makes that relationship much less straightforward than just parent/child or student/mentor. If you like to read post 1800 British literature, benefactor really suits Gojo's role - he acts like one of those wealthy people in novels, snatching up talent because he knows that it will benefit him later, but also truly caring for his charge's well-being. It's a unique kind of relationship that's seldom recognized or codified in the united states, but it wouldn't be uncommon to cultivate these kinds of relationships for someone raised like modern day royalty the way Gojo was.

Shamans live a hard life. Alpha would definitely have had nightmares about something when Megumi was young, and they probably wouldn't have been very good at hiding it, being young themselves. Plus Megumi was an abandoned kid living in an unstable series of situations. He was probably hyper aware of his surroundings for a good little while until things settled with Gojo taking him in.

That said, this headcanon is adorable. Alpha really did have more room in which to be family to the Fushiguro siblings and that means Megumi in turn has more room to show emotion around them.

(I'm bad at social cues... especially online. I don't know if you wanted to see from my point of view what you're describing, but I blurbed it below <3. Thank you for sharing the headcanon anon!)

When staring at the dead TV screen had faded away into a restless sleep, you didn't know. At least this was a formless nightmare, which was both better and worse. Dreams in which you could fight, even with the world sticky-slow or slippery as ice woke you up irritated. The dreams which were made more from the hazy memory-stuff of too many battles, too many near misses and if only we'd been here yesterday's, left you with no specific images but hung themselves like weights in your chest upon waking, robbing you of much needed true rest.

At least, you thought, your consciousness bubbling rapidly back to awareness, it would be over soon. That was truly the best that could be said of bad dreams.

You snapped awake when a warm tongue licked your wrist and a low whine sounded by your ear - distinctly canine rather than human.

In the dark, the shape of White Jade dog glowed like the moon.

You sat up, looking around the room, but neither saw nor sensed anyone (or anything) else in it. Still you crept slowly through the little apartment.

Satoru and Shoko were out of town and you'd come here because you couldn't stand another night alone and now you were glad. The neighborhood was safe enough, but even so...

You trailed your fingers along the wall, the white dog padding along behind you and then slipping past into the kids' room ahead of you.

They were both in bed still, but if the shikigami were out, then that meant someone was awake.

You knelt in the space between Megumi and Tsumiki's beds. She was doing a much better job at pretending than her brother, but if he was awake, then so was she. You sighed softly to yourself. They were both so nervous, even though they hid it. And you didn't blame them.

Too tired for words, you chose to wait instead, and eventually, when you were almost drowsing sitting upright, Megumi rolled over and cracked open one eye. White Jade dog wriggled a little but at the slightest movement from Tsumiki, it stilled again.

Eventually, soon really, they would need separate rooms. Tsumiki had insisted on staying here until the school year was over, but as Satoru had described it, the situation was delicate enough without negotiating for a non-sorcerer to be exposed to the world of curses.

You reached over and tucked her duvet higher over her shoulder, grateful to see at least that some tension unwound from her.

When you turned back, Megumi was no longer pretending to be asleep at all, although that glaring stare of his was softened.

"I heard a noise," he said to your silence, whispered but still defensive.

It didn't take a genius to figure out at this point that you were probably the noise. When this used to happen on overnight missions, Suguru used to shake you awake and sometimes curl up behind you. Satoru would grumble his own reply to your murmuring until you woke and throw a spare pillow, still warm from his embrace, at your head. Shoko would have tugged you slowly into her arms and soothed you back to sleep with her precise fingers rubbing into your neck.

"Well thank you for sending White to come get me," you whispered back, shaking away the memories. "We should go back to sleep though."

Megumi frowned at whatever face you were making and looked at where the white dog was sitting, head cocked almost like a real dog, at the foot of his bed.

It was sweet that he'd sent his favorite of the two to wake you. Black Jade dog seemed to scare him sometimes, literally making him jump at his own shadow as it melted from the darkness.

When he said nothing in reply, you tried to unfold yourself from the floor. Megumi latched onto your sleeve. His face was turned away.

You carefully crouched back down. "How about I stay here tonight?"

He nodded after a moment, just once, barely noticeable except a shift against the pillowcase, but this time he let you go.

You smoothed down a blanket to sleep on and one to sleep under and pulled one of the couch cushions under your head in between the two beds in the narrow room.

Both of the children responded to your prompting "goodnight" and shuffled around to curl up again. Tsumiki's breathing evened out quickly, but the White dog's presence meant that Megumi was still awake.

It was curled around it's masters legs, head propped on his hip as it watched over you.

"Megumi?--"

Neither child nor dog made any noise apart from Tsumiki's sleepy snuffles.

"--I'm okay."

A barely perceptible little hmph came from the bed on your left.

You could hear a clock - the only thing that still had working batteries when you and Satoru had first visited the kids - ticking in the other room.

Almost five minutes later to the second, White Jade dog settled its head heavily over Megumi's side and disappeared with a sigh.

[cs-screenshots]

I want to make a Tales of Luminaria Archive!

*Since this is a pinned post now, I feel obligated to clean it up (October 5, 2022)

I basically wanted to keep a collection of references for outfits, recipes, locations, miscellaneous observations, miscellaneous voice work, differences between the EN and JP audio, localization notes, etc. Mainly a lot of stuff that people probably wouldn’t normally think to keep a record of as well as things that people won’t be able to see/experience anymore when the game shut down.

I couldn’t actually play this game until a few weeks after they announced its servers would shut down because my phone was super old, and I couldn’t buy a new one till that point. There were a lot of things I wish I could’ve seen/had a reference for in the game that I couldn’t find in videos on Youtube...

While I did make the archive tags for my own personal use, I’d be happy to see other Luminaria fans use the archive tags too! I want to see the screenshots, video clips, observations, and links to Luminaria-related content outside of tumblr that other Luminaria tumblr fans want to share!

I made these archive tags for all Luminaria fans on tumblr, not just me.

Now that Luminaria has shut down, all we have left is the merch we bought and whatever screenshots and video clips we took while the game was still online.

I wanted something that I could show to people who’ve never played the game before and people who will never get a chance to play this game. So they could have an idea of what was in it, what it was about, and why people love Luminaria.

(By the way, I was super tired when I wrote this post, so I’m sorry if anything was confusing! But if you look through the tag on my blog here, then I think you’ll have a good idea of what I was trying to do)

Oh yeah, the JP Lumi twitter fandom created a tag that was basically what I wanted to do on tumblr too! Luminaria fans, whether we’re on the EN side or the JP side, share the same ideas sometimes, huh? You can check out the whole tag for references from various JP Luminaria players even without having a twitter account, by the way!

...but I would highly recommend making an account, if only to block this user here:

Be sure you type out this username carefully, by the way. This user tends to steal other users’ Gaspard icons, so you might end up blocking a JP fan on accident. In addition to stealing others’ icons, they’ve also taken other players’ screenshots and act as if they’ve played the game themselves... If you ever hang out in JP Lumi Twitter, you’ll often find them insulting the game, anyone related to making the game, and the game’s fans in many Luminaria-related twitter tags on an almost daily basis.

I don’t know why they do this, and I don’t really care. I just think not giving them any attention and blocking them will result in a more pleasant browsing experience for people who check out the tags in JP Lumi twitter fandom.

JP Lumi fans worked really hard on their extensive user archive tag, so I don’t want anyone to have a hard time while they look through it.

[gfxced]

I think I also know why some people really don’t like me though they don’t know me at all : they can feel the social awkwardness.

Now, I’m not the person I was as a teenager, either pushing people away pretty hard or just being reclusive. I’ve since learned how to parrot social norms and I’ve done it for long enough that I’m pretty comfortable with playing that game. I’m good at articulating my points, though I might take long detours, and I shine whenever it’s a subject that I love (and I love knowing stuff so it’s hard to find a subject that I can’t have conversations about). But I’m definitely still oozing something that people pick up on. 

I believe the most important part my neurodivergence plays regarding socialisation is how rarely I deign to engage in casual pleasantries. I’m not good at small talk, of course, (though I don’t mind its mindless sentences) but just pretending to be nice for no reason is something that irks me to the bone. Being fake, if you will, is a social norm and I can’t abide by that. I can refrain from being unpleasant, but I won’t engage in those “pleasantries” just because everyone does it. (Though if their is strategic value to it, I will be more amenable, which is why in a professional setting, I definitely won’t mind doing it).

Same goes with group think. Whenever I sense that a group starts having a mind of its own, that individuals in it have shut off the little amount of working grey matter they had, I have to bail from that group. I’m profoundly asocial in that situation. I simply have a very sharply marked aversion for dogma of any kind.

Lastly, adding up on this “this guy doesn’t follow the flow” vibe that I might give off, I also very rarely let my emotions steer my thought processes. It wasn’t always like that (teenage years and early twenties were pretty rough). Whenever it happens, I see it as a lack of control, a failure of the mind and I always regret it. I’m extremely self-critical, self-aware and self-analytical. I try my best to make nuanced opinions, and let new information change my positions.

There’s also the fact that conversely, I’m also pretty decent at observing how group dynamics work, and what individuals do in those settings. My ability to quickly judge the character (meaning : intent, interests, motivations) of people stems from self-preservation. A lifetime of having to recognise if a backstab or bullying was coming or not. People are very transparent to me and it is something that they somehow perceive without being conscious of it. To them it comes as me radiating strangeness.

Maybe some of this also transpires online. Maybe that’s why I’m getting blocked a lot on here too? I checked the likes on a mutual’s post and the notes said 13 and I could only count 10.

Yes I know, despite of how I work socially, I still value being liked, curious right? I shouldn’t worry about being liked but when you’ve been put down as much as I’ve been, it’s a bad habit that’s hard to get rid off, you know?

I also worry about it because I am generally good-natured. I wouldn’t have become a pedagogue if I didn’t intrinsically value being helpful and useful to others. But that’s the part of me that requires some digging to be brought to the surface...

TL;DR I may seem weird / creepy / give off a strange vibe but I’m actually a pretty chill and agreeable person.

[mycountry112]

How to Know if Someone Blocked You: 6 Reassuring Signals to Identify

Have you wondered if someone blocked you on social media? It can be tough not knowing where you stand with others. But don't worry, we're here to help. In this article, we'll show you six signs to tell if you've been blocked. Also, we'll briefly talk about how wholesale VoIP providers and SIP trunking help keep connections strong.

Figuring out if you're blocked online is tricky. There are clues like disappearing from contact lists or a friend not seeing your posts. We'll even explain how blocking works on social media, making it easier to understand.

Not being able to communicate is a big hint you're blocked. Unsent messages, call errors, and not being able to mention someone are signs. Even searching with no results could mean you're blocked.

We'll help check your blocked list or privacy settings to confirm. If you still doubt, maybe a friend can ask for you. Just remember to be gentle when you ask.

So, let's find out if you've been blocked. We'll also talk a bit about VoIP and SIP trunking to help you understand better.

Stay curious, respect other people's choices, and let's learn how to spot if someone's blocked you.

Understanding Block Features on Social Media Platforms

Before learning the signs of being blocked, it's crucial to know about block features on social media. These features help you control who can interact with you. They let you understand if someone has stopped you from seeing their stuff or chatting with them. Wholesale SIP trunking can further enhance your communication capabilities by providing cost-effective and scalable solutions for voice communication over the internet.

On social media, you can use block features to stop specific people from interacting with you. This might mean they don't want to talk to you, or they don't want you to see their stuff. Platforms do this to give users more control over their accounts.

Each social media site has its own way of blocking people. For example, blocking someone on Facebook means you can't see or talk to them. Blocking on Instagram stops you from seeing their photos and stories, and it stops them from seeing yours.

Knowing how blocks work on social media can help you understand if you've been blocked. It also shows you how to move around safely in the online world.

Key Takeaways:

Block features on social media platforms serve to restrict interactions with specific individuals.

Each social media platform has its own block functionalities and implications.

Understanding the block features can help you recognize the implications of being blocked on a specific platform.

Unable to Find the Person on Your Contact List

Have you ever experienced the frustration of trying to find someone on your contact list, only to realize that they seem to have disappeared? It's a common issue in this technology-driven era, where communication is predominantly done through smartphones and social media platforms. If you suspect that someone has blocked you, there are a few ways to confirm your suspicions.

One way to know if someone has blocked you is by observing their online presence. If you notice that they haven't been active on social media or haven't responded to your messages for a prolonged period, it could be a sign that they have blocked you. Similarly, if their profile picture or status updates are no longer visible to you, it might indicate that they have intentionally hidden their content from your view.

Another way to confirm if someone has blocked you is by using VoIP services. VoIP, or Voice over Internet Protocol, allows users to make calls and send messages through an internet connection. If you attempt to call or send a message to someone who has blocked you, you will likely receive an error message or a failed delivery notification. This can be a strong indication that the person has intentionally cut off communication with you.

While these signs may suggest that someone has blocked you, it's important to remember that there could be other reasons for their absence. They might be busy, temporarily disconnected from the internet, or have simply decided to take a break from social media. It's always a good idea to approach the situation with a level-headed mindset and avoid jumping to conclusions.

In conclusion, being unable to find someone on your contact list can be frustrating, especially if you suspect that they have blocked you. By paying attention to their online presence and utilizing VoIP services, you can gather clues that may confirm your suspicions. However, it's crucial to consider other possible explanations before jumping to conclusions. Communication is ever-evolving, and it's essential to navigate it with kindness and understanding.

One sign someone might have blocked you is not finding their name on your list. It's like they've disappeared. This could show they don't want to talk or they blocked you.

To check if you're blocked, look for them in your contacts. If you can't find them, maybe they're avoiding you.

Also, see in group chats or messaging apps if you can still find them. If they've gone from these places too, they might not want to talk.

Remember, not finding them doesn't always mean they blocked you. Maybe they changed numbers or deleted their account. But, if many signs point to them blocking you, they probably did.

No Recent Activity or Updates from the Person

Have you ever logged into your social media account or checked your email, only to find no recent activity or updates from a certain person? It can be quite frustrating and worrisome, especially when it's someone you are close to or rely on for communication. In today's digital age, where we are constantly connected and sharing updates about our lives, a lack of activity can raise some red flags.

One possible reason for the absence of recent activity could be a change in communication methods. With the advancements in technology, many individuals and businesses are now using international SIP trunk or wholesale SIP trunking services for their communication needs. These services allow for efficient and cost-effective voice calls over the internet. By opting for these services, individuals and businesses can enjoy the benefits of international calling without the hefty fees associated with traditional phone lines.

Another possibility is that the person in question has switched to a different communication platform altogether. With a wholesale VoIP providers list at their disposal, they may have decided to explore other options to meet their communication needs. Voice over Internet Protocol (VoIP) is gaining popularity due to its flexibility, affordability, and wide range of features. With VoIP, individuals and businesses can make calls, send messages, and even hold video conferences using an internet connection. This could explain the lack of activity on traditional communication platforms.

Of course, there could be other reasons for the absence of updates or recent activity from the person in question. They may be taking a break from social media for personal reasons, or they could be facing technological issues that are hampering their ability to stay connected. Whatever the reason, it's important to remember that not every absence is a cause for concern. However, if you do find yourself worrying about the lack of activity, it might be worth reaching out to the person directly for some peace of mind.

When someone blocks you, you might see fewer updates from them. Things they shared before might disappear. This change could hint that they've blocked you.

If a person suddenly stops posting, you might think they've blocked you. Before, you could see their updates often. But now, their activities hide from your view, making you wonder.

Remember, not seeing their posts alone doesn't prove anything. They may just be taking a break from social media. But, when combined with other signs, this less activity point could mean you're blocked.

Spotting fewer updates from a potential blocker is key. But, remember, you should look at this along with other signs. It helps you truly figure out if they've blocked you.

Messages Not Getting Delivered or Seen

​Have you ever sent a message and gotten no response? It's frustrating, isn't it? You start to wonder if the message even got delivered or if the person on the other end is simply ignoring you. Well, there could be a few reasons why your messages aren't getting delivered or seen.

One possibility is that you have been blocked by the recipient. Blocking someone means that they will no longer receive your messages or see any updates from you. It's a way for people to cut off communication with those they don't want to interact with. If you suspect that you have been blocked, there are a few signs to look out for. For example, if you can still see their profile picture but are no longer seeing their updates or messages, then it's likely that you have been blocked.

Another reason for undelivered messages could be a technical issue with the messaging platform or app. Sometimes, messages can get stuck in limbo and not make it to the recipient's inbox. This can happen due to server issues or network problems. In such cases, it's best to try sending the message again or contact the customer support of the platform you're using to troubleshoot the problem.

Additionally, if you're struggling with consistently undelivered or unseen messages, it might be worth considering using a VoIP service. VoIP, or Voice over Internet Protocol, is a technology that allows you to make calls and send messages over the internet rather than traditional phone lines. By using a VoIP service, you can ensure a more reliable and seamless communication experience. Many VoIP services also offer features like read receipts, which can help you know if your messages have been seen.

In conclusion, if your messages are not getting delivered or seen, there could be various reasons behind it. It's important to consider the possibility of being blocked by the recipient, as well as technical issues with the messaging platform. Using a VoIP service can also be a helpful solution to ensure reliable communication. Remember to stay patient and try alternative methods of reaching out if necessary.

Do you think someone blocked you? One big hint is when they don't get your messages. It's frustrating not getting a reply. This might mean you're blocked.

When your messages aren't delivered, they don't reach the person's inbox or alerts. This can happen on social media, emails, or messaging apps. You see your messages as sent, but they never make it to the right place.

If your messages are unseen, they might be ignored. Even if they get through, they're unread. This leaves you wondering what's going on.

Now, this could happen for other reasons, like tech problems. But if other signs are there, it might be a block.

Look at the bigger picture with this person. If messages are often undelivered or unseen, and other signs match up, they may have blocked you.

Keep reading for more clues on how to tell if you're blocked.

Experiencing Call or Video Chat Errors

If you think someone has blocked you, look out for call or video chat errors. These errors could mean you're blocked. They might make it hard to talk with the person.

Many things can happen with call errors. Calls might keep dropping. Or it might be hard to connect. You could also suddenly not be able to reach them at all. These are signs you might be blocked.

Video chat errors show up if you're blocked too. You might not be able to start a video chat. Or the person won't answer. The audio and video might also look weird. These signs point to a block and can stop you from having good talks.

Important to know, errors can start from other things like tech troubles. But, if other signs point to being blocked, these errors mean more. Signs like not seeing any recent activity or not finding them in your contacts.

Unable to Tag or Mention the Person on Social Media

One big sign of being blocked on social media is not able to tag or mention someone. If you try and it doesn't work, you might be blocked. It can be frustrating, especially if you used to talk online.

Not being able to tag or mention someone means they won't know when you talk about them. This rule works on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and more.

To check if someone blocked you, try to mention them in a post. If you can't find their profile, this might mean they blocked you.

Another way to check is through a mutual friend. If they can't tag the person either, you might be blocked.

Or, you can visit their profile. If you can't see their posts or comments, you might be blocked. But remember, they could just have tight privacy settings.

Not being able to tag or mention someone shows they might have blocked you. If this happens, it's best to leave them alone online.

Mutual Friends Indicate the Person is No Longer Active

When you think someone may have blocked you, watch what your mutual friends do. They can show if the person in question is still active.

Look at what your mutual friends are posting and who they are interacting with. If the person you think has blocked you is not online much anymore, they might have cut ties.

Everyone acts differently online, so be careful in your conclusions. Look at the person's usual online patterns. A sudden drop in their activity hints they might be inactive on the platform.

Trying to understand through mutual friends is okay, but be kind. Remember, everyone has the right to be private online.

Searching for the Person Shows Limited or No Results

Think you might be blocked? If your search shows no or few results, you could be right. This often means the person doesn't want you to see them.

1. Use a Different Account or Platform

​In today's digital age, we are no strangers to the various forms of communication available to us. Whether it's sending a quick text message or making a phone call, staying connected has never been easier. However, there may come a time when you suspect that someone has blocked you. How can you know for sure? Well, one way is to use a different account or platform to reach out to them.

Many social media platforms allow users to have multiple accounts. If you suspect that someone has blocked you on one account, try reaching out to them using a different one. This can provide valuable insight into whether or not you have been blocked. If you are able to successfully contact them using a different account, it's likely that they have blocked you on the original one.

Another option is to use a different platform altogether. For example, if you typically communicate with someone via text message but suspect that you have been blocked, try reaching out to them through a different messaging app. This can help determine if the issue lies with the specific platform or if you have indeed been blocked.

Additionally, if you are using a VoIP service to make calls and suspect that someone has blocked your number, you can try using a different VoIP service provider. VoIP, or Voice over Internet Protocol, allows users to make calls using the internet rather than traditional phone lines. By utilizing a different VoIP service, you can see if the issue is related to the service provider or if you have actually been blocked by the person you are trying to contact.

In conclusion, if you suspect that someone has blocked you, there are steps you can take to verify your suspicions. By using a different account or platform, and even trying out a different VoIP service, you can gather more information on whether or not you have been blocked. While it can be disheartening to discover that someone has blocked you, it's important to respect their decision and move on. Focus on cultivating positive and healthy relationships with those who value your connection.

Try another account or platform to look them up. If you still can't find much, it's likely intentional.

2. Utilize Advanced Search Options

​Are you tired of scrolling through endless search results trying to find the answer to a specific question? Well, luckily for you, search engines have advanced options that can make your life a whole lot easier. One of the most useful features is the ability to refine your search using advanced search options. These options allow you to filter your results based on specific criteria, making it easier to find the information you're looking for.

For example, let's say you want to find out if someone has blocked you on social media. Instead of sifting through numerous articles and forum threads, you can use advanced search options to narrow down your results to only show information on how to know if someone has blocked you. By adding the phrase "how to know if someone blocked you" in quotation marks to your search query, you can ensure that the results will be focused on that specific topic.

Another handy advanced search option is the ability to search within a specific website or domain. This can be useful if you know that a particular website or domain is a reliable source of information. For instance, if you want to learn more about Voice over Internet Protocol (VoIP) service, you can use the advanced search option to only show results from reputable technology websites that specialize in this topic. By including the phrase "what is VoIP service" along with the domain filter, you can quickly find reliable information on this subject.

In conclusion, taking advantage of advanced search options can save you time and frustration when trying to find specific information online. Whether you want to know if someone has blocked you or learn more about a particular topic, utilizing these advanced features can make your search more efficient. By refining your search query or filtering results by domain, you can quickly and easily find the information you need. So the next time you're faced with a vast sea of search results, remember to make use of advanced search options to simplify your quest for knowledge.

Many sites have special search features. They allow you to look for people by adding more info like location. Try using these to find hidden profiles.

3. Explore Mutual Connections

Another way to explore mutual connections is by joining groups or communities that the person is a part of. This can provide valuable insights into their interactions with others and potentially reveal any hidden connections you may share.

Beyond social media, if you suspect someone has blocked you, there are other indicators to look out for. For instance, if you try to call or message them using a VoIP service, such as WhatsApp or Skype, and your calls or messages consistently go unanswered, it may be a sign that you have been blocked.

However, it's important to remember that these indicators are not foolproof and may not always confirm if someone has blocked you. People may simply be busy or not using the VoIP service at that moment. Therefore, it's always best to approach the situation with an open mind and consider other possible explanations before jumping to conclusions.

Exploring mutual connections and understanding if someone has blocked you can be both enlightening and frustrating. While technology has made it easier to stay connected, it has also given us ways to disconnect and distance ourselves from others. It's crucial to respect the boundaries set by others and not to take blocking personally, as it may simply be a matter of personal choice or circumstance. Ultimately, it's always wise to focus on building healthy and positive relationships, both online and offline, leveraging tools like international SIP trunking to enhance communication across borders.

If you have friends in common, look at their recent posts about the person. The blocked person might still interact with your friends.

Follow these steps to see if you're blocked. But remember, not finding someone in search doesn't always mean they blocked you. Look at other signs too.

Alternative Contact Methods No Longer Work

When someone blocks you, they might stop you from using other ways to reach them, like email or messaging apps. It gets hard to talk to them unless it's where they blocked you.

Bad news: If other ways to talk to them fail, they might have blocked you. Emails, messages, or calls might not be answered or even get through.

So, check by sending a message on a different app. If they ignore you or your messages can't go through, they might be avoiding you.

It's tough to be shut out. Remember, they have their reasons to keep away. Instead of trying too hard, it's better to let it be.

Dealing with Blocked Communication

When other ways to talk don't work, look for signs they might have blocked you. Things like no recent chat, not in your contacts, or undelivered messages tell us something's off.

Accept that being blocked happens. So, move on and focus on those who want to hear from you. It's better than trying to force your way through.

Checking Your Blocked Contacts or Privacy Settings

Want to know if someone has blocked you? Check your contacts or settings. This shows if someone doesn't want to talk with you.

Block lists may look different on each platform. Keep reading to learn how to find them on popular ones.

Facebook

Here's how to check your blocked list on Facebook:

Click the top-right down arrow on Facebook.

Choose "Settings & Privacy."

Select "Settings."

Find and click "Blocking."

You can see who you've blocked and unblock anyone if needed.

Remember to also look at your privacy settings. Make sure your posts are seen by the right people. Do this to set your preferences:

Visit your Facebook profile.

Click the top-right down arrow.

Choose "Settings & Privacy."

Click "Privacy Checkup."

Change your privacy settings as you like.

Twitter

On Twitter, finding your blocked accounts is easy. Just follow these steps:

Click on your profile picture in the top-right corner.

Choose "Settings & Privacy."

Click "Privacy and safety."

Under "Safety," find "Blocked accounts."

You can view and unblock accounts from there.

Twitter privacy settings help control who sees your tweets. Follow these steps to adjust these settings:

Visit your Twitter profile.

Click your profile picture in the top-right corner.

Choose "Settings & Privacy."

Click "Privacy and safety."

Customize your settings to your liking.

Instagram

Let's look into Instagram's blocked list:

Go to your Instagram profile.

Click the three lines in the top-right.

Choose "Settings."

Select "Privacy," then "Blocked accounts."

Here, you can unblock people too.

Instagram also has settings to manage your privacy. Here's how to change your account settings:

Visit your Instagram profile.

Click the three lines in the top-right.

Choose "Settings," then "Privacy."

Customize your privacy options.

Make sure to check your blocked list and settings on each platform. This way, you can keep your contacts the way you want and ensure your privacy.

Seeking Confirmation Through a Third-Party

Feeling unsure if someone blocked you? Asking a mutual friend or someone you both know can clear things up. They might give you important info, shedding light on your contact status.

When asking a third-party, be careful. Understand they might have good reasons. Follow these steps to ask without overstepping:

Step 1: Identify a Mutual Acquaintance or Trusted Third-Party

Find someone who can shed light on the situation. This person could be a mutual friend, family, or coworker in touch with both of you. Pick someone honest and neutral to get the best info.

Step 2: Initiate a Private Conversation

Start a private chat with this third-party. You can call, message, or meet them in person. Show respect and value their help.

Step 3: Ask for Honest Feedback

Explain your feelings and ask for their true thoughts. Use questions that let them openly share what they know. Promise to keep their words just between you.

Step 4: Consider the Information Provided

After hearing what they say, think it over. Look for any clues or confirmations of your feeling. Compare this to signs you saw before. Remember, their insight is just a part of the whole story.

This tactful method helps gathering important insights. It can assist in making wise choices about the next steps or removing any confusions.

Understanding Wholesale VoIP Providers and SIP Trunking

Let's talk about how to tell if someone has blocked you online. This involves knowing about wholesale VoIP providers and SIP trunking. They are important for today's ways of talking to each other.

Wholesale VoIP providers give VoIP services to many businesses and people. They set up the internet paths needed for great online talk.

SIP trunking joins a business's phone system to the internet. This way, they can make and get calls online. It's cheaper, can grow with a business, and is very flexible.

The Importance of Wholesale VoIP Providers and SIP Trunking

With wholesale VoIP, businesses can talk cheaper and better over the internet. This cuts down their phone bills a lot. They also get to use new cool features.

SIP trunking, together with VoIP, changes how businesses use phones. They ditch old phone lines, save money on setup, and can easily grow their phone system.

For anyone, learning about VoIP and SIP can improve how you handle phone stuff. They offer cheaper and more efficient ways to talk online.

Conclusion

It can be tough to tell if someone has blocked you online. But, if you notice certain signs, you might have an answer. When you can't find them on your list or see their recent activity, they might have blocked you. Also, if messages don't go through or if you can't call them, it's another sign. Not being able to tag them on social media or finding few results when searching are other clues. Keep these in mind.

Remember, it's key to respect people's choices in how they communicate. If someone blocks you, it's best to move on. Also, services like wholesale VoIP and SIP trunking help keep us talking. They make communication easy and affordable for everyone, business and personal use alike.

Understanding block signs and knowing about communication services makes things smoother. It helps us have good relationships online. We all want to communicate well and be kind while doing it.

[jdgo51]

Embracing Loss to Discover Life

Today's inspiration comes from:

Treasures in the Dark

by Katherine Wolf

I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world. — John 16:33 NLT

Have you ever given up anything for Lent? I’ve always really liked the idea of sharing in a season of repentance and reflection with the global Christian community. I mean, in theory. Despite my good intentions, I almost never remember Lent is happening until we’re already three or four days in. 

At that point, I’m deep into the leftover king cake, and I’ve already spent several hours watching TV and scrolling mindlessly on my phone. So sugar, television, and social media fasts have to be struck from the list, right? Then I scramble to find some treat or habit I haven’t indulged in since Lent began. I usually squeak by with something slightly less concrete, like gossiping or complaining. (It still counts! You know you’ve done it too.)

During a recent Lenten season, a friend posted online about her fascinating decision to give up her “illusion of immortality.” Intense, I know. She explained that if Lent prepares us to observe the role of death in Christ’s story, it should also prepare us to confront the role of death in our own stories. So for forty days she set aside time to actively acknowledge and reflect on her eventual death and the deaths of all the people she loves. (Needless to say, she’s a riot at parties!)

As I followed her online revelations, I had a revelation of my own. By very different means and without consent, I had given up my illusion of immortality too. At twenty-six years old, I’d seen and touched and tasted death when I suffered a catastrophic stroke without warning. 

To me, death was no longer an abstraction. It was an actual experience, and now I had to decide what to do with that. 

I’m most tempted to dig my heels into denial. To deflect with empty optimism. To numb out to the pain (hence the king cake and the TV and the scrolling). I want to do whatever the opposite of a Lenten death reflection is.

At the end of my friend’s forty-day practice, she shared how she’d come to understand that death is not something to be denied, avoided, or even begrudgingly accepted. Death makes the expanse of a lifetime finite and therefore precious. Death is like the gilded frame that gives definition to our living days. It’s the built-in counterbalance that throws all beauty and goodness and aliveness into greater relief. 

Death is not to be ignored.

I think all this is true of literal, end-of-life death. But it’s also true of all our losses. What is loss if not a type of death, after all? The death of a dream or a relationship or an ability. Before my online friend could see death for what it really was, she had to be brave enough to get on eye level with it, spend time with it, and call it by its name. The same, I think, can be said for our losses.

To take its full form, resurrection requires both life and loss

If you’ve spent more than twenty-four hours on earth, you’ve probably figured out that this place can be just a little dark. And sometimes, pitch-black. If you are of the Christian tradition like I am, then you know our shared faith doesn’t shy away from acknowledging the dark stuff. In fact, the first few sentences of the Bible tell us that God carved the world out of a formless, empty void. Ages and ages later, Jesus reiterated the same idea without mincing any words: 

Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. — John 16:33

Hey, you can’t say He didn’t warn us!

The very raw material of reality is darkness. So why are we taken by total surprise when suffering and sorrow find us, and why are we so prone to want to wish it away? 

Ignoring loss, denying grief, numbing out to pain, or strong-arming our souls into premature closure are all such tempting tactics. But these routes are less than useful. And maybe even harmful in the long run. 

Before we can heal, we have to grieve what’s been lost. 

We have to look at our empty hands and feel the heavy absence of the thing we loved. Naming our hurts is the beginning of seeing the goodness of our lives with clearer eyes. What is grief, after all, if not leftover love? To mourn a loss is to recognize a good gift you had.

To take its full form, resurrection requires both life and loss. 

I learned that from Jesus Himself, who died a very real death to prove that a second-chance life is available to us, be it symbolic or literal. When I don’t name the deaths and the losses and the hurts, I rob myself of the full experience of the new life that follows. If death is inevitable, it might as well be useful.

Jesus’ second-chance life set into motion a staggered but certain rhythm of resurrection, echoing through reality: disappointment then delight, hard then good, wounding then healing, loss then gain, death then new life.

But before I can begin to experience resurrection, I have to grieve what’s been lost. If it’s true for me, could it be true for you too?

God, when the night is darkest, when the pain feels overwhelming, when loss and grief crouch at our doorstep — the light of Your presence orients us. You hold us close, lift our heads, comfort us, and speak into our hungry souls the promise of life with You and the hope of our heavenly home. Thank you, God. Amen.

Adapted with permission from Treasures in the Dark by Katherine Wolf, copyright Katherine Wolf.

[moderatetoaboveaverage]

Alright, I've been seeing a lot of people use the word 'fed' a lot recently* to express a particular concept, and for as long as I've been noticing this I've been having some thoughts, and there's just been a post that's come across my dash that I think is perfect for explaining what I've been thinking.

*within the last like, couple years.

To clarify before we start, I agree with the OP of the post, and my critiques are not of them in particular, but a broader culture and shifting of definitions. This isn't a queer discourse post, this is a post about how words are used.

Okay, so here's the post (monochrome'd for visual clarity):

Okay, so my observation is, in this post, what does the word fed, mean? Well, clearly it doesn't seem to imply that the offending parties are literally federal agents, the post is talking to its subjects, who if they were feds would be pointless

No what "Fed" seems to often refer to, and is used to represent in posts like this, is "someone who is disrupting a community from within, often with bad disxourse, or harmful rhetoric". And I think this is perhaps a useful shorthand to have in casual settings, but, I think using the word Fed to express that shorthand is unhelpful.

My reasoning is this: the problems of online discourse are often not the fault of individual bad actors, to understand 'why is online discourse terrible all the time', there are a vast number of complicated nuanced issues that relate, fundamentally, to the infrastructure of the internet. Online communication is built in such a way that facilitates, and exacerbates, anti-intellectualism, interpersonal conflicts, misinformation, etc. I've talked about this before but like, anger drives engagement, anger makes you cognitively impaired, and so the internet is full of people saying dumb stuff because they are angry, attached to the dumb opinions of angry people that made them angry.

(And also, sometimes bad discourse or bad rhetoric seems to just appear on its own, like the modern use of Fed that has been tormenting me for the past couple years)

What the word Fed is doing is, for 1. Flattens all that down significantly into being the fault of "someone who is being unhelpful to the community by doing [stuff that people on the internet do]", but, I don't think that would be all that bad except for, 2. Implying that the people doing that are bad actors, and 3. Implying or at least leaving the door open, for the interpretation that those people are literally federal agents.

Here is a comment on the above post I found in the reblogs:

(Again not trying to come down on anyone, only here to critique words)

This is the logical conclusion that the modern usage of Fed often leads people to. That the problems with modern discourse and online communication are a conspiracy by the government to suppress, (in this example) the queer community. Even if it were to be true (its not like I know what the feds are doing), I don't think it is a useful belief to hold.

In the modern day, where most online community strife is caused by distrust, anger, spite, all driven and enforced by the material realities and infrastructure of the internet. To have the belief that, "when people in my community are hostile to eachother, it's probably because of the feds" primes you to approach intracommunity conversations with distrust! To assume to anyone you are speaking too could be a bad actor, that their opinions could be an intentionally designed waste of your time, all of that is exactly the kind of thing that drives interpersonal and intracommunal conflict.

And, I think it behooves us, as people who are in community with eachother, to believe that the people with opinions we find unhelpful (within reason, there are, in fact, some sockpuppets and trolls who are just trying to waste your life) are, in a sense, real.

And just because they're real, it doesn't mean you have to invest your time, that precious sand in the hourglass, into arguing with them.

[junosmindpalace]

“Have you posted any photos of Y/N?”

Ushijima blinked as the words from his best friend processed through his head.

“Why does it matter?”

“I mean, the two of you are together! Couples are always taking photos together and showing them off on social media, y'know! It’s like a love language all on its own.” 

Suddenly, Wakatoshi is panicked. Is this something you wanted from him but never asked for the fear of sounding silly? Was he being a bad boyfriend because he hasn’t been taking to his Facebook to proclaim his love for you?

It’s an offhand comment Tendou makes to fill the silence between them. He was scrolling through his Instagram and shared a small observation. What he doesn’t expect is to gradually see his best friend grow increasingly active on his socials, uploading pictures from his travels but primarily ones with you in them. 

He isn’t the only one taken aback; you too start to grow suspicious of Wakatoshi’s sudden, newfound love of photography. 

He was hardly attached to his phone, especially when he was out in public. He did most of his work on his laptop when it was required of him and was rarely active on his social media. For the most part, he only ever remembered to check his phone for texts, emails, calendar reminders and the like before dedicating the rest of the night to winding down with you. 

You couldn’t even remember the last time you had seen your boyfriend take a picture, yet suddenly he seemed to be very adamant on capturing all of your moments together. On dates, on away games you decided to come along on, even on simple walks through the park. You found it sweet that he seemed to be taking up a new hobby, and even more flattered when more often than not you were his muse. You can’t deny that his adamance on wanting “to capture your beauty” didn’t make you blush. But you could see the look of internal conflict on his face as he played around with his phone’s camera settings, his weird disappointment in himself when he deflates and tells you he missed a bunch of moments he could’ve captured. 

You always insisted that it was better for the two of you to enjoy the moment, knowing that Wakatoshi feels the same. Yet the look of frustration only dulls a slight bit, a conflicting expression on his face as he mulls over both yours and Tendou’s words in his head. 

“I don’t have much to post today.”

You blinked at his response to your voiced concern over this dejected look of his as you stood by a boardwalk with an ice cream cone in hand, looking at him as he stared distressingly at his phone. It was one of those times when Wakatoshi took you to see the sights in an area he was playing in, and the sun was starting to set under the horizon to conclude the eventful day of sightseeing. 

“To post? Are you talking about your socials?”

He nodded as he continued going through the sparse amount of photos he did remember to snag, most of them blurry from snapping them on the go. “Tendou told me it’s a thing couples do.”

“Well, you don’t need to do it. Why do you?”

“To show you off. I thought you might’ve liked that stuff.”

Wakatoshi did not have any particularly strong feelings toward his phone or social media, but in general you know that he tended to only spend the amount of time he needed to on them. At best, he had no interest, and at worst, they were a harmful distraction. 

So for your boyfriend to expand his online presence simply for your sake-- for your potential desires from him-- made your heart swell as you eyed his frown and brows creased in distress. 

You laughed as you walked toward him, wrapping your arms around his waist, chin digging into his chest as you tilted your head up to look at him. 

“You know that stuff doesn’t matter to me. I care more about you being in the moment with me than some silly Instagram post.”

And now that you’ve reassured him, this insistence of his to capture every moment feels a little silly. The bombardment of social media notifications from posting you hasn’t helped ease his anxiety either. He’s grateful that he doesn't need to prioritize it so heavily anymore. 

This would probably be one of the moments he should be capturing right now, but Wakatoshi can’t bring himself to care. Not when he could be holding you and admiring your beautiful smile as it gleams up at him, big and bright. A camera could never do your beauty enough justice, anyway. 

(He takes a photo a couple of minutes later as you greedily finish off the ice cream he bought you, with the chocolate staining the ring of your mouth and the sun setting into the harbor, and your bright eyes turned upward into tiny crescents as you smile in a bashful attempt to escape from Wakatoshi’s lens. He posts it. A camera could never do your beauty enough justice, but this was the closest it could get. Tendou tells him to quit his socials the next time they meet.)

[dictacontrion]

Hey for the ask thing F, I, and U ! Thank u I love your blog and your work !

Thanks, nonnie!! These have been a blast!! 

F: Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

Okay so I actually love writing dialogue, it is kind of my fave, and I don’t have one single favorite, but this one, from Make Me a Headline (I Want to Be That Bold) came to mind: 

“I want you.”

“For—bed?” Harry asks, eyes flitting nervously upwards at the ceiling and, presumably, the bed above them.

“Yes,” Draco answers, “but not only.”

Harry takes another step towards him. “What else?”

“Dancing,” Draco says. “Champagne.”

“Yeah?” Harry prompts.

“Dinner,” Draco adds. “Letters.”

“Answered letters?”

“Answered letters. And…dates.”

“Public dates?”

“Yes. And…” Draco takes a turn at stepping forward, “breakfast.”

“Breakfast?”

“Breakfast,” Draco repeats. “After…”

“Bed?”

“Yes.”

“For breakfast, you’d have to stay.”

“Yes.”

“And you want?”

“Breakfast.”

“Oh,” Harry breathes. “Breakfast.”

I like it because I think usually I’m drawn to snappy banter, and clever characters who are able to explain themselves, and when there’s lots of witty subtext, and this is sort of the opposite of that. It’s a very emotionally naked moment for them, and it felt like piling on the words wasn’t going to work. What matters here, for them, is how well they understand each other without words, that they know each other so well they don’t need further explanation to get what’s at stakes. Well, and that they’re able to create this space that works emotionally for both of them, such that Harry can be reassured while Draco doesn’t have to put himself so explicitly on the line that he recoils into defensiveness. But how to get them to communicate that when saying it would defeat the purpose? This felt like the really right solution - the economy of language, the repetition, the construction of the story so that the readers and the characters have to recall a lot of complicated history in order for this to have meaning, and (hopefully) that the simplicity of the actual words pushes the reader to be present alongside the characters in being attentive to the complexity of the meaning behind them. And I thiiiiink it does that successfully? Though readers would know better than I would! 

I: Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)?

My writing guilty pleasure is 100% the banter mentioned above, which wouldn’t be a guilty pleasure at all, vs something very fun, except that I tend to do it when I’m stuck or stonewalling, so will occasionally feel a bit guilty when I notice that’s what I’m doing.

My reading guilty pleasure (though as a phrase, I prefer smug indulgence to guilty pleasure!) is probably 1D/BBC RPF AUs, which, there are just some really fun ones, and it’s in this fic space that I don’t write or rec or mod or really blog about very much, so it’s work-free pure indulgence. 

U: Share three of your favorite fic writers and why you like them so much.

I take this question to ask what I like about three of my favorite fic writers’ writing but, if you’ll bear with me, anon, I am going to intentionally misinterpret this for a moment (and will do it over properly if you like!) and tell you about three of my favorite fic writers and why they are some of my favorite people (with the caveat that I could easily do this for a dozen more!) and #sorrynotsorry, hopefully these lovely individuals will be up for tolerating some tenderness.

1. I have had the extraordinary luck to be within driving distance of @firethesound​ for most of my fic-writing life, and while I’m sure many of you, like me, admire her writing enormously, I am here to tell you that it is the tip of the iceberg. I have lost track of the number of times I have been having a crap week, only to show up at fire’s house and find the kettle on and cookies waiting, or the number of times she’s listened while I talk through whatever’s bothering me, or the number of days that have been improved by her company. She can be very stealth about how funny she is, and how incisive her commentary is, and how thoughtful her views are, and how observant she is, and how creative and resourceful and resilient and patient, and how she cares for the people around her, and how curious and interested she is, and how good at figuring things out, and how determined, and how generally much of a stone cold badass she is when the situation calls for it, but it’s all very, very present and I am perpetually blown away, and so, so grateful to the universe that our paths crossed. It’s made my life more balanced and fuller and funner and funnier and inspired, and that’s very much par for the course when spending time with fire. 

2. @gracerene09​ is a brilliant writer who just knocks my socks off a little bit more every time I read her latest work, and also has been my adventure buddy across two continents, three countries, and two (soon to be three or possibly maybe four!) states, and holy fuck she is amazing. She is so thoughtful and so unbelievably on the ball and possessed of good common sense and feet firmly on the ground, and she is the rare human who manages to be all of that and imaginative and silly and hilarious and adventurous and game for flights of fancy. Like, we can have a spreadsheet and a plan A and a plan B and then get drunk and have a selfie competition and end up wandering some random places absolutely cackling our butts off. And having seen her in all of those contexts and done loads of fandom and RL stuff with her, I can absolutely say that she’s one of the few people in the world whose judgment I trust implicitly. Even when we disagree, I trust her process and her ability and willingness to talk it through and figure it out. I also have the hugest admiration for the way she approaches the world with an eye towards growth; if she notices something she wants to change, she changes it, and she does it in ways that are deeply reflective and considered and dauntless and principled, and it’s truly incredible and an honor to see how that’s played out, is playing out, over the years. 

3. When it comes to fandom, and to life, @writcraft has become one of my absolute favorite people to talk to. Writ’s approach to writing and thinking is so masterful and meticulous and smart, I am constantly in awe. I have endless appreciation for the way they’ve written queerness into fic, which takes it so seriously and pays homage to its history, and would happily listen to them talk about queerness and culture for hours, both as it has to do with fandom and as it matters in the world beyond. And alongside this phenomenal, blinding awareness and knowledge, they’re also so much fun. I often come away from my conversations with writ reminded that all things - fandom, politics, the daily business of life - are meant to have elements of joy and connection in them, that the object isn’t only to learn and work for change, but to remember what it is that’s worth working for, and to stop and enjoy it, and to change things, even when that involves taking risks, in order to build a more enjoyable, connected, intrinsically motivated life. Whether it’s a serious conversation about political commitments and practice, or a serious conversation about fandom, or getting drunk and sweaty and dancing till ready to drop, having writ around is guaranteed to make it richer and sweeter and better. 

Fic asks!

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Looking for a Place to Happen

Warnings: non-consent sex and rape (series), age gap, general stupidity.

This is dark!biker!Sam Wilson x reader and explicit. 18+ only.  Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Series Synopsis: There’s lots happening in Birch and you find it all too amusing.

Sister series to Smalltown Bringdown, When the Weight Comes Down, Little Bones, and Fully Completely

Note: We’re starting Sam’s installment but this weekend I’ll probably only be catching up on my headcanons and drabbles because I’ve been a lazy bitch and I’m sorry to those who have been waiting.

Thanks to everyone for their patience and feedback. :)

I really hope you enjoy. 💋

<3 Let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!

Chapter 1: I've got a job, I explore

💀💀💀

The sleepy town of Birch was awake. 

In those last weeks, the arrival of outsiders had roused the attention of many once passive residents of the timeless territory. Those brick buildings unchanged by the tick of the clock inlaid into the old tower above the library that chimed every hour on the hour. They still stood with only chips in the mortar but the air tasted different. The frost was more bitter and the sky more grim. An omen of something no one could predict.

It was the perfect setting for a screenplay. The isolated town with its unsavoury secrets and the visitors who threatened to bring them to the surface. It was inspiring to you, to imagine what was hidden behind the stern wrinkled faces of the town elders and under the jackets of those men who wore the cut of the local club. The bikers ruled the town covertly but everyone knew that Bucky Barnes’ palm was lined with the map of Birch.

As a bystander, an unnoticed observer, just another ant in the hill, you watched from the side and amused yourself with the drama of others. It was like a soap opera or another HBO hype machine. Those things you aspired to when you could be free of this ho-hum town.

The snows added to the natural gloom of the place. The deep heaps smothered the noise and harkened back to those days of colonial settlement. Forgotten, desolate, fearful. 

You ventured down in your heavy boots that stretched to your knees and pushed your chin down into your scarf. As a child, you ran and jumped in those piles, now you were out of breath just trying to walk past them.

You stopped in the bakery that doubled as the only café, a place where the owner, Babs, tried to to intimidate the last caffeinated trends. She was always a few seasons behind but you didn’t mind so much. 

You ordered the salted caramel mocha and waited patiently as the quiet woman fought with the steaming machines. She was older than you but you’d work with her for one summer during high school, only five years ago. She had the eyes of a child still, but there was something worn in her. As if she’d been exposed to far too much in her three or so decades in that place. She was a harbinger of what you didn’t want to become.

You thanked her for your drink and set out once more into the billowing winds. Birch winters were never kind but this one was crueler than most. Your teeth chattered as you blew the steam away from the lid and hugged it with your mittened hands.

You stopped short as you heard the familiar ding of the diner door across the street. You recognised the mechanic who kept to herself and once growled at you in the grocery store. She stormed across the street, followed closely and quickly by a black-haired man you’d only seen once before. He was one of those outsiders who came to deal with the club men.

You sped up as you sensed chaos brewing and pulled out your phone as you balanced your paper cup in your other hand. You flicked your camera on just as you got to the front of the shop and the man grabbed the mechanic. You let out an ‘oop’ as she turned on him and you aimed the lens at the couple as they fell into the snow, the man’s shoes giving little traction to his steps. 

You moved closer, stunned by the scene, and kept your cell phone rolling as you found a better angle around the snowy walks. As she choked him on the ground he elbowed her and she coughed as she rolled away. She snarled as he clamoured to his feet, slipping and sliding as he marched away.

You killed the recording and watched the man cross the street again, nearly wiping out as he did and when you looked back to the mechanic, she was gone behind the clattering door. You chuckled to yourself and tucked away your cell. It was prime footage for TikTok; with a bit of editing, it would be comedy gold.

💀

You stomped up the steps of your grandmother’s house, this time through the front door as you heard her chair rocking in the front room. You usually took the stairs in the back as you paid her to live on the upper floor of the duplex. You checked in with her daily, she didn’t get out much more than the occasional trip to the grocery store when you couldn’t or you dragged her out to join you for a tea at Babs’.

“You’re late,” she grumbled as you set your cup down and unzipped your coat.

“For what?” you scoffed.

“It’s after noon and you don’t even come down to say hello? A ‘good morning, nan’,” she harrumphed.

You chuckled and hung your coat before shoving your boots over on the mat. You grabbed your mocha and leaned on the doorway as you watched her crocheting in her chair, reruns of some court show playing from the boxy television.

“I was working,” you said, “sent in some stuff for review. Hopefully not much work to be done.”

“I don’t know how you make money on that interweb,” she bemoaned, “I don’t trust it.”

“Maybe you’d trust it more if you used the Netflix subscription I got you,” you crossed your arms, “then you wouldn’t have to watch trash daytime TV.”

She shrugged and muttered under her breath. She could be crotchety but you liked her sense of humour. Your aunts and uncles never came around because they just took it as spite. You were the only one who knew how to handle the jaded old lady.

“Maybe you coulda looked out the window,” you snickered, “quite a show going on in town.”

“Hmm, what’s that?” she stilled her needles and reached for her tea stained cup.

“Just a fight. You wouldn’t believe it, that lady mechanic beat the shit--”

“Language,” she huffed.

“Anyway, she had this guy in a chokehold. It was awesome.”

“What guy?” she squinted at you over her glasses.

“I dunno. Some out of towner. Remember I told you about that burly dude hanging around the library?”

“There’s more?” she sucked on her teeth, “those bikers have never been good news and now they’re bringing in more.”

“Yeah, well, what’re you gonna do?” you sniffed as you took out your phone and rewatched the scuffle with the volume down. You shook your head and opened up your TikTok. 

“I don’t understand why you’re always on your dang phone,” your grandmother pestered.

“I’m not always on my phone,” you smiled at her smugly, “there are those time when I’m listening to you prattle on or you know, making you tea, oh, and cooking you dinner. What was it I did last week? Oh that’s right, I got Pippin out of the crawlspace.”

“I’m too old to be chasin’ that cat all around,” she huffed, “where is he anyway?”

“He’s your cat, I don’t know? Last time I saw him, I sent him back out the window for shredding my charger.”

“He knows you need to give it a rest,” she laughed to herself, “got your nose to that screen too much.”

“And what do you do, old lady? Crocheting doilies to put where exactly?”

She gave you that dry smile, the one that said watch it but carried a hint of humour still. You hit post and put your phone away as you waved off her irritation.

“Well, you know what, I sit all day at my computer, doing who knows what and you know what it got me?” you taunted, “a large mocha!” you sipped as you sat on the sofa and grabbed the remote, “and it’s paying my rent and putting bullet points on my resume.”

“Mhmm,” she scowled, “just remember, real life ain’t online. Those videos you’re always laughing at like hyena, that’s not reality. You forget it and it’ll come back and bit you. ‘Specially with those bikers.”

“Oh, nan, you know too well, don’t you? Didn’t you have a fling with one back in your hippie phase?”

“Two, actually,” she raised her brows, “I was young and stupid. Not like you, but still.”

“I love you too,” you chirped and sipped from your cup, flicking the station to Jerry Springer, “that’s more like it.”

💀

Your usual TikToks were sarcastic and dull complaints about your small town life. The response was less than pleasing but it gave you an outlet to vent. You liked to goof around and document the very specific type of weirdos that resided in Birch. But the video of the fight in the snow blew up your phone and made it difficult to ignore the buzzing as you went back up to your room to eke out the last of your captions for the ad agency.

When at last you could call your day hard-earned, you logged off and sent in your hours to the agency. Social media promotion was easy enough but the working gigs for a thousand different companies was tedious. You hoped you could build your portfolio enough to manage a single corporate page as you continued to chip away at your creative outlets.

You picked up your phone as you waited for Netflix to load on your tiny smart tv and flopped onto your bed, not two feet from your desk. You hit the icon in the upper panel of your phone and scrolled through the notifications, pausing to turn on another episode of the cable sitcom from ten years before. You snorted as you read each comment but the number under the video made your eyes round. The thing was bound to go viral.

As usual, you went down to help with supper. Pippin, the orange tabby, returned to cry at his dish and you fed him too. Your nan peered through her glasses at a crossword as she tasted the tangy pasta sauce. 

“More basil,” she snipped.

“Well, I asked if you wanted to help,” you muttered, “I think it’s good.”

“Hmmp, I need milk,” she jutted her chin out, “for my after-dinner tea.”

“You couldn’t say something like three hours ago?” you blinked.

“I could have but I didn’t,” she snickered. You rolled your eyes and she took another forkful of penne and filled in another line on her puzzle, “ah, no hurry, girlie, you know I’m patient.”

“Patient? You?” you chuckled as you took your plate and shoved it in the microwave to keep it warm. The ancient thing had a dial and the door stuck, “I’ll just go get it over with.”

“Don’t forget your mitts,” she called after you as you tramped into the front room, “it’s cold.”

You pulled on your knitted cap and matching mitts. You zipped up your parka and shoved your feet into the deep boots. You grabbed your wallet and buried it in the spacious pocket. You bounced out the front door and down the steps as the sky sent down another coat of powder for the night.

You went up White Forge Street and through the short path behind the diner that led to the main road. You glanced over at The Asp, the beacon of the dull town, and turned towards the grocer. Like anywhere in Birch, the store was outdated and stuffy. It felt like stepping into another time with the paper bags and chunky tills.

You went down the center aisle and stopped at the fridge to search through the frosted glass. Your nan only drank whole milk and the last time you carelessly grabbed skim, she whined that even Pippin wouldn’t drink it. She was particular but that was just her nature. You couldn’t say you were any less fussy in some instances.

You grabbed a jug and the door slapped closed against the worn rubber seal. You headed up the candy aisle and brushed your woolly thumb over your chin as you considered gummy bears or Reeses’ Pieces.

“Hard choice?” The deep voice jolted you.

You snatched the box of chocolate and looked over at the man in leather, his chin tucked down behind the collar as snow dusted his shoulders.

“Sure,” you said as you brushed past him.

The cut of the leather told you he was better not entertained. While you thought the men amusing, you weren’t stupid enough to engage with them. You rarely listened to your grandmother but she was wise in her own way. 

You knew a girl in highschool, she was fucking around with one of the club men in her junior year, she ended up with a baby and no support. You didn’t think he was into you that way but he could hardly have innocent intentions.

“How’s the old lady?” Clayton asked as he rung in your order at the end of the belt, you moved along with the groceries and pulled out your wallet.

“The usual, you know? She’s tryna quit again. Don’t know how long it’ll last.”

“Oh yeah? I’ll keep a carton aside for her,” he kidded as you felt your phone vibing in your back pocket.

“Don’t encourage her,” you swiped your card and punched in your pin, “although I don’t know what’s worse; the smoke or her sucking on those mints all the time.”

“Oh, it’s not the bitchin’?” he laughed.

“That, too,” you scooped up the paper bag and put your wallet away, “have a good one.”

As you came to the end of the first counter, you were nearly cut off by the club member as he swept around from till two. His own purchase of a car magazine and jerky was tucked under his arm.

“Ah, sorry,” he smiled, a sparkling smile, almost charming.

“No worries,” you continued on and he followed close behind.

“Those mitts look real warm. ‘Specially in this weather,” he said as you pushed open the door.

“Uh huh,” you kept on as your boots crunched out into the snow.

“You know where I can get a pair. Leather isn’t exactly thermal, you know?”

“These? My nan made ‘em. I’m sure Clayton got some hung up back there,” you looked across the street as you stepped up onto the ledge of snow between the sidewalk and the road.

“Am I bothering you?” he asked.

You looked at him dumbly and almost laughed in his face. You glanced back across the street then down towards The Asp.

“Sorta,” you answered.

“Make you a deal. Leave ya alone for your name.”

You eyed him. He was older than you like many of the Commandos. At least a decade, likely more than that. You chewed on your hesitation and cradled the bag more firmly against your side. His eyes strayed as he tried to see through the thick layer of your coat.

“Nah, I’m not s’posed to talk to strangers,” you said and hopped off onto the road.

You heard him behind you as he struggled to follow and as you came up to the other side, he came parallel with you and kept stride with you easily.

“I know you’re young but you’re not a kid,” he intoned, “what’s the harm in a name?”

“It’s a small town,” you stopped short of the end of White Forge, “I think I know enough about you to avoid you.”

“Oh ho, is that it? Well, I’m Sam, I’m not a stranger now, am I?”

“Not interested, Sam. Sure there’s women your own age over at the bar,” you nodded behind him.

“You wanna come see? Maybe have a drink?” he gave a crooked grin.

“You don’t give up, do you?” you shook your head, put off by his forwardness.

“Well?”

“Not tonight, Sam,” you turned around and headed down White Forge.

“Then what night?” he asked but you didn’t answer and he didn’t follow.

You turned down onto your street and refused to look back in case. It would be best not to mention the run-in to your nan, she was paranoid enough as it was. Besides, you’d forget about it by the end of next week.

[meruz]

once again i am answering asks in a big compilation post. included is... gotham, patrick stump, tips about drawing backgrounds, tips about drawing in general, links to my faq, and infinity train

like.... the tv series? No... I’ve drawn dc comics fanart before, though. But it’s been years since I’ve been really into it. I like jumped ship like 10 years ago when the New 52 happened LOL.

AFJHDSLKGH I’m sorry I (probably) won’t do it again??

Actually full disclosure I have a truly cringe amount of p stump drawings/photo studies in my sketchbook right now LOL. He’s just fun to draw... hats, glasses, guitar, a good shape... but I don’t think I’ll rly post those until I can hide them in another big sketchbook pdf.. probably Jan 2022. Stay tuned........ (ominous) 

(ominous preview)

These are all sort of related to backgrounds/painting so I grouped them together even though they’re pretty much entirely separate questions.... ANYWAYS

a) How is it working as a BG artist? Is it hard? What show are you drawing for?

I think you’re the first person to ever ask me about my job! Being a background artist is great. It’s definitely labor intensive but I think that could describe pretty much any art job (If something were rote or easy to automate, you wouldn’t hire an artist to do it) and I hesitate to say whether its harder or easier than any other role in the animation pipeline. Plus, so much of what truly makes a job difficult varies from one production to the next, schedule, working environment, co-workers etc. But I will say that I think while BGs are generally a lot of work on the upfront, I think they’re subject to less scrutiny/revisions than something like character/props/effects design and you don’t have to pitch them to a room like boards. So I guess it’s good if you don’t like to talk to people? LOL

A lot of my previous projects + the show I’ve worked on the longest aren’t public yet so I can’t talk about em (but I assure you if/when the news does break I won’t shut up about it). But I’m currently working on Archer Season 12 LOL. I’m like 90% sure I’m allowed to say that.

b) ~~~THANK YOU!! ~~~

c) What exactly do you like to draw most [in a background]?

@kaitomiury​ Lots of stuff! I really like to draw clutter! Because it’s a great opportunity for environmental storytelling and also you can be kind of messy with it because the sheer mass will supersede any details LOL. 

I like to draw clouds... I like to draw grass but not trees lol,,, I like to draw anything that sells perspective really easily like tiled floors and ceilings, shelves, lamp posts on a street etc.

d) Do you have any tips on how to paint (observational)?

god there’s so much to say. painting is really a whole ass discipline like someone can paint their whole life and still discover new things about it. I guess if you’re really just starting out my best advice is that habit is more important than product. especially with traditional plein air painting, I find that the procedure of going outside and setting up your paints is almost harder than the actual painting. There’s a lot of artists who say “I want to do plein air sometime!!” and then never actually get around to doing it. A lot of people just end up working from google streetview or photos on their computer.

But going outside to paint is a really good challenge because it forces you to make and commit to lighting and composition decisions really quickly. And to work through your mistakes instead of against them via undo button.

My last tip is to check out James Gurney’s youtube channel because hes probably the best and most consistent resource on observational painting out there rn. There’s lots other artists doing the same thing (off the top of my head I know a lot of the Warrior Painters group has people regularly posting plein air stuff and lightbox expo had a Jesse Schmidt lecture abt it last year) but Gurney’s probably the most prolific poster and one of the best at explaining the more technical stuff - his books are great too.

e) Do you have tips for drawing cleanly on heavypaint?

@marigoldfool​ UMM LOL I LIKE ONLY USE THE FILL TOOL so maybe use the fill tool? Fill and rectangle are good for edge control as opposed to the rest of the heavy paint tools which can get sort of muddles. And also I use a stylus so maybe if you’re using your finger, find a stylus that works with your device instead. That’s all I’ve got, frankly I don’t think my drawings are particularly clean lol.

f) Tips on improving backgrounds/scenes making them more dynamic practicing etc?

Ive given some tips about backgrounds/scenes before so I’m not gonna re-tread those but here’s another thing that might be helpful...

I think a good way to approach backgrounds is to think of the specific story or even mood you want to convey with the background first. Thinking “I just need to put something behind this character” is going to lead you to drawing like... a green screen tourist photo backdrop. But if you think “I need this bg to make the characters feel small” or “I need this bg to make the world feel colorful” then it gives you requirements and cues to work off of.

If I know a character needs to feel overwhelmed and small, then I know I need to create environment elements that will cage them in and corner them. If a character needs to feel triumphant/on top of the world then I know I need to let the environment open up around them. etc. If I know my focal point/ where I want to draw attention, I can build the background around that.

Also, backgrounds like figure compositions will have focal points of their own and you can draw attention to it/ the relationship the characters have with the bg element via scale or directionality or color, any number of cues. I think of it almost as a second/third character in a scene.

Not every composition is gonna have something so obvious like this but it helps me to think about these because then the characters feel connected and integrated with the environment.

Some more general art questions

a) Do you have any process/tips to start drawing character/bodies/heads?

I tried to kind of draw something to answer this but honestly this is difficult for me to answer because I don’t think I’m that great at drawing characters LOL. Ok, I think I have two tips.

1) flip your canvas often. A lot about what makes human bodies look correct and believable is symmetry and balance. Even if someone has asymmetrical features, the body will often pull and push in a way to counterbalance it. we often have inherent biases to one side or another like dominant hands dominant eyes etc. you know how right-handed artists will often favor drawing characters facing 45 degrees facing (the artist’s) left? that’s part of it. so viewing your drawing flipped even just to evaluate it helps compensate for that bias and makes you more aware of balance.

2) draw the whole figure often. I feel like a lot of beginner artists (myself included for a long time) defer to just drawing headshots or busts because it’s easier, you dont have to think about posing limbs etc. But drawing a full body allows you to better gauge proportion, perspective, body language, everything that makes a character look believable and grounded.

Like if you (me) have that issue where you draw the head too big and then have to resize it to fit the proportions of the rest of the body, it’s probably because you (I) drew the head first and are treating the body as an afterthought/attachment. Sketching out the whole figure first or even just quick drawing guides for it will help you think of it more holistically. I learned this figure drawing in charcoal at art school LOL.

oh. third mini tip - try to draw people from life often! its the best study. if you can get into a figure drawing/nude drawing class EVEN BETTER and if you have a local college/art space/museum that hosts those for free TREASURE IT AND TAKE ADVANTAGE OF IT, that’s a huge boon that a lot of artists (me again) wish they had. though if youre not so lucky and youre sitting in a park trying to creeper draw people and they keep moving.. don’t let that stop you! that’s good practice because it’s forcing you to work fast to get the important stuff down LOL. its a challenge!

b) I’ve been pretty out of energy and have had no inspiration to draw but I have the desire to. Any advice?

Dude, take a walk or something.... Or a nap? Low energy is going to effect everything else so you gotta hit that problem at its source.

If you’re looking for inspiration though, I’d recommend stuff like watching a movie, reading a book, playing video games etc. Fill up your idea bank with content and then give yourself time/space to gestate it into new concepts. Sometimes looking at other art works but sometimes it can work against you because it’s too close. 

Also something that helps me is remembering that art doesn’t always have to be groundbreaking... like it’s okay to make something shitty and stupid that you don’t post online and only show to your friend. That’s all part of the process imo. If you want to hit a home run you gotta warm up first, right? Sports.

I should probably compile everytime i give tips on stuff like this but that’s getting dangerously close to being a social media artist who makes stupid boiled down art tutorials for clout which is the last thing i want to be... the thing I want to stress is that art is a whole visual language and there are widely agreed upon rules and customs but they exist in large part to be broken. Like there's an infinite number of ways to reach an infinite number of solutions and that’s actually what makes it really cool and personal for both the artist and the viewer. So when you make work you like or you find someone else’s work you like, take a step back and ask yourself what about it speaks for you, what about it works for you, what makes it effective, how to recreate that effect and how to break that effect completely, etc. And have a good time with it or else what’s the point.

for the first 2, I direct you to my FAQ

For the last one, I don’t actually believe I’ve ever addressed artwork as insp for stories/rp but I’ll say here and now yeah go ahead! As long as you’re not making profit or taking credit for my work then I’m normally ok with it. Especially anything thats private and purely recreational, that’s generally 100% green light go. I only ask that if you post it anywhere public that you please credit me.

(and I reserve the right to ask you to take it down if I see it and don’t approve of it’s use but I think that case is pretty rare.)

a) @lemuelzero101 Thank you!!! I haven’t played Life is Strange but actually  that series’ vis dev artist Edouard Caplain is one of my bigger art inspirations lately so that’s a really high compliment lol. And yeah I hope we get 5-8 too...!

b) Thank you for sticking around! I’ve been thinking about Digimon and Infinity Train in tandem lately, actually. They’re a little similar? Enter a dangerous alternate world and have wacky adventures with monsters/inanimate objects that have weird powers... there’s like weird engineers and mechanisms behind the scenes... also frontier literally starts with them getting on a train. Anyways if anyone else followed me for digimon... maybe you’d like Infinity Train? LOL

c) @king-wens-king I’M GLAD MY ART JUST HAS PINOY VIBES LOL I hope you are having a good day too :^)

a, b, c, d) yessss my Watch Infinity Train agenda is working....

e) aw thank you!! i think you should watch infinity train :)

[itsclydebitches]

Please stop putting Rwde in the main tags holy shit. Blocked tags dont work on trending tags

Okay, today we're going to have a talk about curating your own content online. This isn’t the first time I’ve had an anon, somewhat angrily, demand that I stop using the “RWBY” tag and I’m sure it won’t be the last. However, my answer remains the same: No. Sorry. I’m not going to stop. Why?

Because my posts are about RWBY.

In case the above isn’t answer enough, let’s do a quick FAQs.

Why are you using the “RWBY” tag when so many of your posts are critical?

Because, as said, my posts are about RWBY. That’s the subject. I’ve been in the RWBY tumblr fandom for over five years now. I want all my RWBY content accessible in one place on my blog, not divided up between praise posts, critical posts, fanart, fic, etc. If an easy division between the first two is even possible (which it's not). It’s just all RWBY and, oddly enough, when I started reblogging and posting here, I tagged it with “RWBY.” Because that’s the show. My tagging system is far from complex, but I’m not about to re-organize or switch up 228 pages of content.

But we decided a long time ago that critical posts shouldn’t go in the main tag.

That’s ridiculous. People realize that’s ridiculous, right? I mean, I know we've all mostly agreed to observe this self-imposed rule, but that doesn't mean I haven't been raising an eyebrow at it since it first came up. I’ve been in a lot of fandoms and I’ve never seen another that insisted only praise could go in the main tag. When you come on tumblr and want to look up RWBY posts, you expect to get everything about RWBY—any post that deals with that subject. I would stake a great deal on the assumption that there are other posts in the main tag that you dislike, anon, simply because that's how people work. We all don't like the same things and, indeed, in a long-running show with a massive cast, there's going to be stuff we hate too. Ships you can't stand, takes you think are awful, that character you’re just so sick of seeing… yet we don’t exclude other, major subjects from the tag just because certain individuals dislike them. If we did, there would be no “RWBY” search because no one would ever agree on what is and is not allowed.

You have “RWDE” though.

We do! And as evidenced by the post you’re upset with, I use it when I think it's warranted. Here’s the thing about “RWDE” though: no one can agree on that either. Some fans think “RWDE” is solely for the angry, curse-laden posts. Others think it’s only for posts that are 100% critical. Others think it’s for ranting critical posts, not analysis critical posts. Still others think it’s for posts that say anything bad about RWBY, no matter if other parts of the post are complimentary or neutral—with "bad" ranging from "Actively insulting aspects" to "I didn't praise this enough to the individual's liking." It's so subjective as to be almost useless, to the point where "RWDE" posters are currently upset that others are posting critical takes about "RWDE" takes. Where do we draw the lines then? Your guess is as good as mine. But the one time I tried to post solely in “RWDE,” I was getting different anons going, “Omg stop posting in rwde this isn’t rwde!” So… my posts are apparently too critical for “RWBY” and, often, not critical enough for “RWDE.” Fantastic.

Just create your own unique tag then.

On the social media website where we post specifically to have other people interact with our work? You may not like my posts, anon, but other people do. “RWBY” is useful in part because it allows like-minded people to find me. If I only used a unique tag, I’d never come up in searches. Besides, I already do have a unique tag: “mymetas.” Every critical RWBY post of mine has that attached. Thus, it’s your job to blog “RWDE,” “mymetas,” or me entirely.

I tried that though and tumblr’s blocking system didn’t work for [insert reason here]

I really am sorry to hear that, it sucks, but tumblr’s shoddy system is not my fault—nor my responsibility. And now we come to the part about curating our online experience. Sometimes it’s not just about blocking everything because the system itself is flawed. Often you have to go further by scrolling past.

I'm going to say that again because people really need to practice it more on tumblr: scroll past the content you don't like.

If you don’t like a post, don’t read it. If you start reading a post and realize you don’t like it, stop and go find something else you enjoy. Being a responsible fan online often means going, “Huh. I hate that” and moving on, not coming into the author’s inbox to demand that they—impossibly—ensure that you never have to see something you hate ever again. Anon, you spent more time with something you claim to dislike by coming into my inbox to write and send a message demanding that I stop using "RWBY" than you would have by simply ignoring my post and moving on. That tells me you care more about controlling others' online experience than you do managing your own.

But we don’t want to see critical takes in the “RWBY” tag! We come on tumblr because we love the show and it sucks to see people dragging it all the time. I just want to enjoy the show in peace.

A valid stance… and one that doesn’t have a leg to stand on when it comes to RWBY. Between the time I posted about the teaser and the time I saw this ask, two hours had passed and a hundred and four new posts had appeared in “RWBY." I know because I took the time to count. The RWBY critical community is absolutely miniscule compared to the rest of the fandom. There are maybe 2-7 new “RWDE” posts a day, max, and those are coming from a few key blogs that focus on analyzing the show. There is no scenario in which there are so many critical posts that it’s ruining your RWBY time on tumblr, simply because that amount of critical content doesn’t exist. And if seeing a single critical take from my blog—or even 2-4, because that's my own max per day—honestly upsets you to the extent that you can't just move on, you shouldn’t be on a website known for its diverse content and incredibly iffy blocking system. My posts exist in a sea of RWBY excitement, praise, and celebration. It is your job to scroll past, anon, not my job to play a subjective, rigged game to ensure you never brush past a single bit of seaweed in that massive, ever-expanding ocean.

What this argument comes down to is, “You’re not allowed to tag RWBY content with RWBY because I don’t like what you have to say.” Sorry, but that just doesn't work for me.

[ddarker-dreams]

Aspiration. Yandere Chrollo x Reader [COMM]

click here for part 2! 

Watching others has always been a hobby of yours.

There’s a lot to be learned from observing and watching how people behave and interact. Whether it be for your own simple amusement, or for the sake of gathering information. While some may find it creepy to keep such a keen eye out for others, you don’t look at it that way. Understanding human nature has an endless list of advantages, after all. 

It started as a small side project. When you’d stumble across information on the Phantom Troupe online that wasn’t at a ridiculous price, you found yourself looking more into them. Possible members, possible motivations, surface level stuff. The more you looked into the more you descended into a minor obsession. Questions plagued your mind about their goals, the theories you found too shallow for your taste. 

Through carefully studying their past hits, you came to the conclusion there were no patterns to be found. Nailing down the next possible heist felt like searching for a needle in a haystack, a part of you losing hope at the prospect of ever being in the same area as them. 

So you busied yourself in other ways. From digging through hours of forums and pricey information, you pieced together the most possible members. While they’re all unique in their own right, the apple of your eye has always been their mysterious leader. There have been no solid leads on his real name, much to your chagrin. 

But the leaked autopsies from what’s assumed to be his victims are fascinating. The cause of death was always different! For most nen users who kill, the method of death was typically similar with minor discrepancies. But for whoever this leader was, it almost felt like he had an unlimited amount of abilities. Was that even possible? 

The morality of his actions had never been a strong concern of yours. Wanting nothing more than an opportunity to learn more about him, you brainstormed all you could on how to gain any form of contact. That’s when you got the idea of posting information online yourself, but not about the Troupe. 

From guessing where they might strike next, you posted on hunter websites about information that they might find helpful. Important figures to expect at the events, bodyguard’s abilities that had been confirmed from previous employers. Whether or not the Troupe actually looked and used the information is a mystery, but the prospect of assisting them felt… thrilling. Like you were almost a part of them yourself. 

That leads you to where you are now. A mini road trip of sorts, your last exit approaching fast. 

The Troupe’s realm of possibilities stretched throughout the entire globe, but never close enough where you could investigate in person. But that all changed when rumors of some of the strongest hunters being hired popped up, for a museum exhibit that would be opening tonight. In your city, nonetheless! 

Securing an invitation to the event was a tedious matter, but the possible payoff was enough to keep you motivated. Though being in attendance for too long could be risky if they do actually strike, running surveillance throughout the area would be easier without having to sneak around bouncers. 

Checking your glove department, you find a blurry photo that serves as your hope. It had been posted on a hunter information website earlier today, a credible one at that. Even if obtaining it cost you a pretty jenny, you didn’t think much of it. In the image is what’s believed to be one of the members. A girl wearing a dark turtleneck with equally dark, short hair. 

Having driven around the back of the museum, you lean back into your chair. Stretching your aching muscles, you see why this area is such a hot spot. While the actual exhibit itself didn’t interest you much, it’s evident a lot of effort went into preparing this event. Limousines had lined the entrance, important individuals emerging in expensive outfits; waiting to be escorted inside. 

It’s quieter back here though, with no flashing cameras and chatty socialites. The silence gives you the opportunity to think through your plan once more.

‘I shouldn’t go in unless one of the bodyguards gets suspicious at my loitering. If I’m lucky, maybe, just maybe… I’ll see the Troupe tonight. And their mysterious leader.’ 

Rolling down your windows, you keep a sharp eye on your surroundings. Boredom never gets the opportunity to set in, your own rapidly beating heart never once slowing down. Having flung yourself into a possible lion’s den, the last thing you need to do is relax your concentration; it could be the death of you.

The exhibit opens at 8:00, and it’s currently 7:30. 

The exhaustion from the day starts to weigh on you against your will. All the preparation and anxiety leads to your eyelids feeling heavy, leading you to lightly slap your face. The last thing you need to do is loosen your concentration. That’s when you suddenly feel a strange sensation. 

Perking up almost immediately, your rapidly eyes dart around for the source of this ominous feeling. Only to find nothing out of the ordinary, your car is the only one in this parking lot. Checking your mirrors again, you catch a glimpse of what appears to be dark fabric. 

‘Am I just imagining things?’ 

As far as you see, you have a finite amount of options ahead of you. One, to ignore whatever it is you just saw. Two, to drive off as fast as you can. Three, activating your En to see if anyone is in your immediate area. Staying without doing anything doesn’t feel wise in the slightest, and driving away wouldn’t matter if it is indeed the Phantom Troupe. They’ll catch up to you before you can set any solid distance. 

That leaves using your En. 

It’s risky, but everything about this trip is. Taking a deep, shaky breath, you close your eyes. Activating your En, you feel nothing out of the ordinary. Maybe everything is getting to you after all? It is late, after all. There’s always the possibility that they’re out of your range, but if you were able to see it in your mirror they couldn’t have been that far away.

“So you are a nen user after all?” An unknown voice breaks any semblance of peace you have, scurrying your mind into action. 

Snapping your head to your left, your eyes widen at the sight of a stranger. Not bothering to take a second look, you immediately react by going to start your car. Before you get the opportunity, your car door is pried off by them with ease; their presence threatening. Hands twitching over your keys, you realize they’re faster than you are.

“There’s no need to be hasty,” A deep voice says next to you. “Move back, slowly. What happens to you all depends on your next actions.” 

All you can hear is a mantra of cursing within your own mind. Leaning back as you were told, you hesitantly look to see who your possible assailant is. Much to your surprise, it looks to be a young man around your own age. Wearing a long, leather coat with fur; raven black hair slicked back. 

‘Could this really be…?’

Given the tense situation, this individual doesn’t seem perturbed in the slightest. Is this the confidence a Troupe member normally exudes, if that’s who this is? You can’t help but feel a sense of admiration, that would undoubtedly be stronger if not for the dire circumstance. 

He helps himself to your glove department, rummaging through your insurance information. 

“Ah, your name is [First] then?” he inquires, finally breaking some of the tension in the air. 

It’s a rhetorical question, so you don’t humor him with a proper response. He studies your defensive position with analytical eyes, taking in as much information about you as you are about him. You get the feeling that in comparison to him, you’re more of an open book. 

“Do you want my wallet too?” you can’t help but inquire with sarcasm, almost immediately regretting it as his eyes widen. Why you can’t ever keep your mouth shut is beyond you, but he doesn’t seem to mind. 

“This gives me all I need to know for the time being,” he states with minor indifference, waving your insurance paper with a smile. “But I appreciate the offer.” 

Humming in response to his words, you can’t help but throw in another cheap quip. “Something tells me you’re not a police officer.” 

He laughs in good humor at your biting words. “Well, you’d be correct.” 

Before you’re given the opportunity to ask who this person is, he speaks as if he knew what you were intending to ask. 

“I’m surprised you don’t know who I am, [First]. Seeing as you’ve dedicated so much time into researching me.” With this, he places the paper back into the glove compartment with a click. Giving you his full attention, you feel like every aspect of you is being scrutinized. It takes all your will power to hold eye contact, his dark eyes unlike anything you’ve even seen before.

Mouth agape, you speak without thinking. “I take it my VPNs weren’t good enough then.”

Another chuckle leaves his lips at your comment. 

“At first they were. Shalnark had difficulty finding out your identity for a while, but everything can always be traced back to its source,” he leans closer to you, tilting his head. “You’ve been an enigma to me to say the least.” 

“I feel like I should be saying that, not you.” you mumble breathlessly, the reality of the situation hitting you like a ton of bricks. This is either the worst prank in existence, or you’re actually speaking face to face with a member of the Phantom Troupe. While them tracking you down was always an unfortunate possibility in the back of your mind, you never paid much attention to it. 

“You’re free to say what you like. I don’t have any intention of killing you… unless you try something stupid,” he explains to you, straightening his posture. “But you haven’t given me reason to believe you’d do that.” 

A shaky sigh leaves your lips, your attention turning from him to the fists in your lap. Everything in your body is screaming to run, to do something, but you know it’ll be for naught. While he said he wouldn’t kill you, it’s not nearly enough to comfort you. There are fates worse than death, after all. 

“Don’t you have a crown to steal or something? Why waste time with me if you’re not going to kill me?” 

He blinks at your question, before amusing you with an answer. “I’ll get to that later. I’m more interested in seeing what you’re going to do, if I’m being honest.” 

“What I’m going to do…?” you repeat his words back aloud, hoping it’ll help you process the information better.

Knitting your eyebrows together, your mind races to make sense of the implications in his words. This must be how jesters used to feel back in the day, you surmise. Is he expecting you to do something entertaining? Well, given as there’s a solid chance you’re going to be dead in five minutes, why not.

“Alright, I’ll bite. Since I’m likely dying soon, why not tell me your name? It’d be cool to know that much in the afterlife.” 

He considers your words, before responding. “Didn’t I say that as long as you don’t act foolishly I don’t intend on killing you?” 

“I figured talking this much to a Phantom Troupe member counted towards my ‘acting foolishly’ points.” 

“Maybe it does, yes. And to answer your previous question, but my name is Chrollo.” 

The name is one you’ve never heard before. Despite only having met Chrollo a few minutes prior to now, you feel that his foreign name suits him well. Practicing the pronunciation on your tongue in a low tone, you feel a sense of pride at having uncovered this newfound information. It’s more than anyone else has learned.

Chrollo looks down at his watch briefly, before returning his attention back to you. It’s uneasy being incapable of hiding your feelings as well as he does, but you still try your best. Straightening your posture, you try to think of what to say next. This situation is one you never expected to be in. If you had known this would’ve happened, you would’ve prepared some questions at least…

He’s toying with you, you know that much. But it doesn’t seem to have any malicious intent behind it. Rather, a genuine intrigue towards your motives. It could just be hopeful thinking, but you feel like Chrollo wants something from you. Though you’re unsure what. 

“Since I shared my name with you, I believe it’s only fair if I asked you a question of my own,” Chrollo insists, your heart racing for whatever comes next. “Why is it you spend so much time assisting the Spider?” 

You blink. It’s actually a question that you’ve seen before in responses to your posts. People wondering if you were just messing with others by spreading false information, or if you’re an undercover hunter trying to fool the Troupe or something. The question never really sat right with you, since you couldn’t give a good answer to it yourself.

But now that you have a captive audience, you need to think of a coherent response. Vocalizing feelings that you don’t even understand yourself, while under pressure, is certainly anxiety inducing.

Placing a finger to your chin, you articulate your response to the best of your abilities. “I don’t think I have a solid reason. I just found you guys interesting, in a way. No one really knows your motivations, for example. It just adds this mystery element.” 

Chrollo takes in your answer with a slight frown, seemingly not expecting such an unsure response. Since you have no reason to lie at this point, you assume he doesn’t think you’re being untruthful. He’ll undoubtedly call you out on it if he thought you were being dishonest.

“And what do you think our motivations are?” Chrollo continues to press, not settling until you give a satisfactory response.

‘He really isn’t letting me off the hook easily, is he?’

“Well, that’s always been a hot topic. Typically people guess that you do it to spite the rich, or to assert power. I even read one theory that you guys were under a curse and the only way to be free is to steal rare items for the person who cursed you! Weird stuff.” you let out a shaky ramble, scratching your neck with an airy laugh.

“Is that what you believe then?” 

“Not really,” comes your response with a dismissive wave. “I could be wrong, but… I’ve always thought that there isn’t a special motivation. That you do what you want, only for the sake of doing it. There doesn’t always need to be a solid reason for a person’s actions. Sometimes… people just do things.” 

Much to your surprise, Chrollo’s interest remains on you despite your long-winded rant. Why your opinion means anything in the slightest to him is still beyond you, but he seems to be taking in every word seriously.

“For the sake of doing it, huh…?” Chrollo repeats your words back to you, considering them himself. Whatever you said must've struck a chord, as he appears in deep thought by your side. A few moments of tense silence go by, causing you to frown. 

‘Hopefully I didn’t upset him. I didn’t think I said anything that bad, though.’

“You may be right,” Chrollo breaks the brief silence, causing you to jump. “You’re a very strange person, [First].” 

“S-strange? I don’t think you have room to talk,” you blurt out before you can think twice, Chrollo smiling in good nature at your curt response. “I guess you’re kinda right though. Any normal person wouldn’t have been in this situation. I think.” 

“Anyways… since we’re doing some question give and take here, I have some of my own. If that’s okay with you.” 

Amusement flickers in his eyes at your unabashed interest. “Do your worst.” 

“So, there’s always been rumors of one member that I’ve found to be the most intriguing. I’ve seen the most speculation that it’s the leader of the Troupe, but of course no one really knows for sure.” you begin to ponder aloud, Chrollo letting out a soft chuckle at the word leader. 

“Basically, the cause of death is almost always different! I’ve heard of people having a few different types of Hatsu, but never more than two or three. It’s almost like his nen is having unlimited nen abilities? I don’t know, it’s just really fascinating. That’s the only reason that could explain it.” 

“Anyways, you’re probably not too keen on sharing Troupe abilities with a stranger. But like… blink twice if I’m right. Throw me a bone here.” 

Throughout your entire explanation, you paid extra attention to picking up body language. Just anything to see if Chrollo would subconsciously give a hint or two towards your theory being correct. But his ability to control himself is unparalleled. He only looks highly entertained at everything you say. 

“You’re almost right,” Chrollo confirms, making your eyes widen in surprise. “I would know. I’m the boss of the Troupe, after all.” 

His last sentence repeats like a mantra in your mind, your jaw loosening as you realize the full impact of them. 

Not only are you speaking to a member of the Phantom Troupe, but you’re speaking to their leader? This definitely wasn’t what you were expecting when you woke up today. Had you have known you were speaking to the leader, you may have been more polite. 

‘Oh god I’m so fucked.’

“Okay, uh, Mr. Chrollo. Sir. I now just realized I’m definitely gonna be disposed of. So. I have a business proposition. I have a pet cat at home, and if I die, he’s gonna starve. If it’s not too much trouble, can you set him up with like a meal service or something? Here, let me get my venmo…” 

“I’m still not planning on killing you,” Chrollo refutes with a shake of his head at your insistence on the matter. “Though I suppose it’s understandable why you would be worried about that.” 

“So torture it is then?”

“It hadn’t crossed my mind.” 

“Oh…” 

Pursing your lips, you lean back into your seat with a deep sigh. This entire ordeal has been the most stressful time of your life, if not the most notable. The sides of your head feel like they’re pushing against your brain, a massive headache on the way. Sliding down in your seat, your eyes flicker to the time. 

7:43.

‘It’s felt like hours! Only thirteen minutes, huh? I guess time doesn’t fly when you’re speaking to a murderer.’ 

“I do believe it’s my turn to ask you a question now.” Chrollo states, leaning back into the passenger’s seat as if it were his own car. The way he speaks commands such respect, you wonder if it would be impossible for anyone to refute him. You certainly weren’t going to test your luck.

At your lack of rebuttal, he continues. “Why go through all this trouble if not for money? Or prestige?” 

‘Why is he so intent on giving me a midlife crisis?’

“If I had wanted money I would’ve posted detrimental information about you guys,” you respond with an unnatural ease. “But most of the people who do that end up dying. And prestige? Who cares what a bunch of strangers think about me. It’s not gonna do me any good at the end of the day.”

Shaking your head at the thought, you continue. “No, none of those things matter that much. I only wanted to appease my own curiosity. To learn what others tried, only to succeed where they had failed.”

Chrollo hums in response to your heartfelt words. He takes a moment to consider them himself, before leaning in closer to you. At the sudden, unexpected movement; you can’t help but flinch. 

Instead of causing you any harm, he gently places a strand of stray hair behind your ear. Your face ignites in warmth at the tender gesture, your tongue failing to form any coherent words. His cologne almost dulls your senses, overwhelming presence leaving your eyes wide as saucers.

He looks at you with a knowing smile, before retracting his hand and sitting back in the seat. Your hand shakily touches the same area he did, in wild disbelief. 

‘What just happened? Am I dreaming?’ 

“To be truthful, I’ve known about you for a while before now, [First]. I’d been intending on meeting you at some point. It just so happened that everything fell into place the way it did.” Chrollo informs you, serving only to befuddle your feelings further. 

“You’ve fascinated me in the same way I have you. Observation can serve an important purpose, but I’d longed to pick your brain in person instead. Thank you for indulging me.” 

“I-I really don’t know what to say,” you stutter out in response, swallowing thickly. “I knew spending ten dollars on a VPN wasn’t going be enough.” 

“I would’ve found you regardless.” 

‘Good god what is happening? When did breathing become so difficult?’ 

“Oh... well that’s... good to know I think?” 

Chrollo looks at his watch yet again, and you wonder if it means anything detrimental for you. Realistically speaking he probably needs to rekindle with the rest of his group before performing whatever heist they have planned. 

“It looks like our time together has almost run out,” Chrollo says, a soft sigh leaving his lips. “I hadn’t realize how much time went by.” 

Your hunch now confirmed, you once again go over your options. Should he try to do anything to you, there’s still a chance you could make it to the front of the museum in time to alert the bodyguards. If you’re crafty enough, that is. Whether or not you can think coherently in this state is up in the air, as your eyes flicker momentarily to the door handle. 

Hand twitching, you exhale shakily at the thought of your backup plan. What else is there for you to do? Although you’re afraid to test out who’s faster, since you get the feeling it isn’t you. 

Chrollo shakes his head at your obvious thoughts, reaching forward to lock the doors with a dreadful click. 

‘There goes that idea.’

“Still thinking of how to get away, hm?” he asks in a chiding tone, a blush returning to your cheeks at his words. Chrollo seems capable of reading you without even having to try, as frustrating as that is.

“Well, what else am I supposed to do exactly?” you counter, your words coming out shakier than you had hoped. The underlying sarcasm is still there, even with your waning tone. 

“You could come with me instead.” Chrollo offers, in a way that seems too genuine to make any shred of sense. 

“What?” you choke out, spluttering at the implications of his words. 

“Exactly as I said. I’m interested in you, and you know enough now to be considered dangerous,” Chrollo states as if it were obvious. “I know I phrased it like a question, but it’s not exactly a choice."

“In that case, I can’t really say no can I?” you mumble, grasping your hand to hopefully stop it from shaking. Control of your body had slipped through the cracks, leaving you in a constant state of alertness. 

“You could, but I wouldn’t recommend it,” Chrollo looks at you in a way that shows he’s already won. “Instead, you’ll do this.”

“I already have someone monitoring you here -- so running won’t do you any good. Sit here and wait for me to come back. You can do that, can’t you?” 

Biting your lip, all you can do is nod your head. It’s better than dying, you figure. 

Chrollo seems content enough with your obedience, sliding over to leave the same way he had came in. Before he leaves you to your own thoughts, he offers a final quip.

“We’ll have a lot more discuss while we travel together, [First].”

[waywardwrestlewritingwaif]

Raise the Stakes, part 14

Aaaaaaannnnnnd we're done! I literally decided on this ending today and I'm posting it before I start to get THE DOUBTS. I hope you enjoy it and thank you so, so, so much to everyone who's liked/ commented/ messaged along the way.

There's mention in here of an interview that did actually happen a couple of days ago and what's included is pretty much what I've read online. That said, I've embellished some for the purpose of the story, so I'm not claiming to know anything.

Previous sections are on the Master List.

Pairing: David Finlay x OFC x Jay White

Word count: 2,767

Content advisory: other than the usual language, nothing really. Should I be cautioning people about angstiness? Because there's angst.

Thought you should see this.

The toneless message with its link is ruining your day. You can’t stop looking at it, but you don’t want to open the link again because you don’t want David to see it. Not that you have any reason to feel guilty. If anything, he’s the one who has some explaining to do but he also has the biggest match of his life tonight, the one where he can finally put the years of tension and rivalry with Jay behind him. You want to be supportive but you also want some answers.

It can wait, you tell yourself for the hundredth time. You’ll talk about it tomorrow. Or next week. All the time in the world. At least, that’s what you hope.

The whole day, the two of you are together but you have to keep a little bit of distance. Don’t want to get distracted and he has to conserve all the energy he can. Doesn’t stop you from touching each other, of course, but even when you do, it feels like you’re still at a distance. He’s trying not to think about anything except tonight. Or maybe it just looks that way. Maybe he’s thinking about his future beyond tonight, when he moves on. It would be nice to know if he wanted you to move on with him but he’s not letting you in on his plans. Hell, if it were up to him, you wouldn’t even know that there were plans.

You’d expected Jay to have some sort of mocking comments. How come the boyfriend you’re so in love with is giving interviews talking about signing with another company, moving to another state, changing everything about his life, and you don’t know anything about it? How Jay had looked at that interview and immediately known that you weren’t aware of it is beyond you. It’s unnerving sometimes, his ability to figure things out when it comes to you. You suppose it’s one of the reasons he’s always been able to get under your skin and make you do what he wants.

But aside from the initial message, he doesn’t say anything. You think that maybe it was a ploy to see if you’d confront David and start a fight before their match, because that’s exactly the kind of ugly trick Jay loves. When you arrive at the venue, though, you see him getting out of a car at the same time. He doesn’t look scornful, doesn’t shout something insulting, doesn’t strut like a damn peacock in mating season, nothing that you would normally expect from him. He looks straight at you and doesn’t smirk or sneer. On anyone other than Jay White, the look might be interpreted as concern.

Technically, you’re supposed to be there for all the performers but at this point, there’s very little left for you to do. It’s all on them now and if everything turns out to be a garbage fire, it won’t be because of any failings on your part. So you do your rounds to make sure everyone has what they need, knows their cues, gets any questions answered. But you always circle back to where David is and stay for as long as you can before your nerves get the better of you.

And then there’s the one person you should check on, but don’t. You aren’t completely derelict. You check with the people he has around him, you even lower yourself to telling Chris Bey that he can text you if his majesty needs anything. Strangely, you don’t hear anything. You text Jay once to say that you’re available to help. You keep it professional and don’t mention anything about the link he sent earlier, so you’re expecting him to needle you about it, or at least act like you’re useless because you aren’t spending your entire day catering to him. Nothing. You’re almost tempted to go check to make sure he’s not sick because one thing Jay White has never been is one to stay quiet when something is bothering him. Maybe he feels sorry for you, in which case you’d rather he yelled.

You enjoy as much of the show as you can but you spend the last minutes before his match with David, largely quiet, just holding each other’s hands. You walk as far as you can with him and, as his music hits, squeeze his hand extra tight. He turns and gives you a soft, quick kiss before leaning back and doing it again, deeper.

“I love you,” he says, cupping your face in his hand.

“I love you too.”

He sounds like he’s trying to convince himself of something. You sound like you’re calling after a train that’s already left the station.

Against your better judgment, you stay where you are. Jay arrives, already acting his part, hands tapping idly on the belt that, in theory, is the reason they’re fighting. You stare at him waiting for him to acknowledge you but there’s nothing. His music swells and he heads out like you’re not even there.

“Just like old times,” you mutter to yourself.

And still.

You watch from backstage as Jay holds his belt up, grinning and preening like he never had a moment’s doubt. You know him well enough to know that’s not true. He keeps cutting looks back at David as if he’s expecting to have to defend himself again, as if he doesn’t believe that he’s truly vanquished him.

The audience doesn’t share his insecurity, cheering him on like he was the hero and David the villain. He’s obnoxious and self-centred but they love him anyway. It makes you feel a little less stupid for the years you’d spent doing the same.

A couple of assistants help David backstage, holding ice to his neck and making sure he doesn’t collapse on the way to the locker room. He looks angry, sullen, and bitter, but not injured, which is a relief. You turn away from the scene in the ring and follow him back to his dressing room, taking over from the dojo students on ice duty when you get there. You don’t speak. You figure it’s better to let him decide when he’s ready.

You’d love to, of course, because despite the fact that you don’t want to make his night worse, it’s becoming unbearable to keep everything inside.

“Where does it hurt?” you ask quietly, picking up a new cold pack.

“Everywhere,” he mumbles.

You hold the ice against his lower back, remembering the awful hit he’d taken on the ring apron.

“You looked great out there.”

“Didn’t feel so great.” He gives you a little smile. “Onward and upward, right?”

“Or southward?” You don’t even mean to say it out loud because this is absolutely not the time to bring it up and certainly not in this passive aggressive way.

“Southward?” He raises his eyebrows like he doesn’t know what you’re talking about but you can see immediately that he does.

“Nothing, it’s ok.”

He sighs. “What’s southward?”

“Do you need another ice pack?”

“Uh oh, sounds like someone’s been reading the dirt sheets.”

“Just making a joke.” You wish you hadn’t brought this up because now you have to try to cram it back into its hiding space in your brain. And you have to suppress the fact that you’re actually kind of angry.

He watches you, trying to gage your state of mind. “Shouldn’t listen to idle gossip.”

That hits like a slap across the face.

“It’s not gossip, David. You did an interview with Wrestling Observer. If people are speculating or have questions, it’s because of what you said yourself.”

“It’s just talking. I didn’t confirm anything.”

He seems a little proud of this, like he’s very clever for getting people talking about what they don’t know. He doesn’t seem to have an issue with the fact that you’re one of those people.

“It’s all there, though,” you murmur. “Talking about how much you want to work in the States, that you want to try somewhere new, that you’re moving to Florida. You’re going to NXT, right?”

He shrugs and avoids your eyes.

“Were you ever going to tell me about any of this or did you figure I’d be able to piece together where you’d gone from news clippings and Reddit posts?”

“Of course I was going to talk to you. Nothing’s final yet.”

“So you were waiting until you bought a house in Florida and signed a contract with another company? Then what? You’d wake me up one morning and just say ‘bye babe, I’ll be living in another state from now on?’”

“The opportunity came up. This,” he gestures to the two of you, “is still really new. I didn’t want to introduce all these complications.”

“David, I’m not some girl you picked up in a bar. We’ve known each other for years. You’ve talked to me before about your contract renewals. Seems like you could have told me something.”

“I was going to tell you something. When I had a better idea of what I wanted to do.”

“You told a journalist, a ‘dirt sheet’ in your own words, that you’re in the process of moving to Florida. That seems like you have a pretty clear idea.”

“Ok, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for you to find out. You don’t even read that stuff normally.”

“You’re aware people are talking about this on social media, right?”

He grunts but doesn’t say anything more. It’s infuriating. He looks resentful that he has to explain himself, like he didn’t think this was going to be an issue for you. Finally, he meets your eyes, guilt very clearly evident now.

“I don’t know why I didn’t say anything. I’m an idiot, I could have figured out that you’d see something, or that someone would tell you.”

“It is my job to know stuff like this, all other considerations aside.”

“Believe me, I did not want you getting this from some random dweeb on Twitter.”

“I wish it had been a random dweeb on Twitter.”

He looks surprised and then it’s like part of him collapses when he realizes what you mean.

“Got up this morning to a one line text and a link to the article from our old pal. You know, making sure I’m not out of the loop.”

“Asshole.”

“In this case no. Somehow, you managed to cede the high moral ground to a man whose morals are generally nonexistent.”

“What do you want me to say?”

“Well, this is hardly the ideal moment to have this conversation, but I want to know if and how you see me fitting into this new life you’re going to have.”

He shrugs a little. “How do you want to fit in?”

The realization hits you hard. “You don’t think this is going to last, do you? You didn’t think I was serious.”

“Wanting is a lot easier than having.”

“Maybe for you.”

“No, that’s not what I meant, it’s just that I… You’re right. I didn’t think I needed to consider you. It wasn’t part of my decision-making process.”

“You’ve been setting this up for weeks. All this has come together at the same time you’ve been with me almost every day. If I wasn’t part of your process, that was the decision right there.”

The two of you stare each other down but there seems to be nothing left to say.

Eventually, you rise to your feet and stammer, “I’m just going to… I need to take a walk or something.”

You wander around the place, watching the crew rushing to pack up. Eventually, you find yourself outside, where the ring still stands, bathed in the glow of the safety lights. It seems forlorn in front of the empty seats but there is still a kind of magic about it. That’s what draws people to this business, you suppose, the feeling of magic.

Since no one else is around, you climb up and through the ropes, kicking off your shoes. You’ve been in one before, but always just to set it up or break it down. You’ve never had an in-ring moment. And there’s a reason for that, which is that you can barely wrestle your way out of your winter coat. But as long as you’re here and you need to do something to take your mind off the sensation that your chest is about to rip.

You run, or jog, from one side to the other, bouncing off the ropes as you do, the way you’ve watched dozens of men doing for years. Although you know the “ropes” are actually steel cables with a plastic coating and you’ve handled them before, it surprises you how much it hurts when you hit them too hard. It’s not the worst pain you have right now.

You pick up speed a little and then practice letting yourself “bump”, a fancy way of saying fall flat on your back. Each time, you knock the wind out of yourself a little but you get right back up and continue your running. Finally, you have enough momentum that you’re able to just roll yourself into a somersault, and sure, it’s not the most perfectly executed thing, but you keep your body straight and you pop right back up. Just like a pro.

“Ta-da!” you say to yourself.

That’s when the tears come. It’s not falling to pieces, but the stew of emotions inside you just starts to leak out. What the hell do you do now?

There are some footsteps behind you, echoing a little in the empty arena, and you see a man’s approaching shadow loom behind you, pushing his long hair back from his face as he crouches down. So you’re not startled when a thick pair of arms wraps around you and you feel his face pressed against your neck.

“Come home.”

You give an unhappy laugh. “Home is kind of a weird concept right now, Jay.”

“You’re always home for me. I guess I was hoping you felt the same way.”

You snap your head to look at him, pulling back enough so that you can focus on his eyes. In all the time you’ve known him, you don’t think he’s ever looked as calm as he does in this moment.

“Congratulations on your win.”

“Yeah, I get to be a target for a while longer.”

“Stop pretending you don’t love it.”

“Sure, I love it. It’s nice. There are other things I love more.” He runs his fingers over your cheeks, cleaning away the remains of your tears. “I’m sorry about sending you that story earlier.”

“All the shit you’ve pulled over the years and that’s the thing you apologize for?”

“Oh I meant I’m sorry that I had to be the one to send it. I don’t want you to shoot the messenger or anything.”

“If I haven’t shot you by now, I think you’re safe.”

He laughs and pulls you back against his chest, kissing down your cheek and neck. Then he stands, pulling you right up with him and letting his lips trail over the crown of your head.

“Come on.” he whispers, taking your hand.

“Wait, I need my shoes.”

You dart over to pick them up and he’s right there to help you into them and to lead you through the ropes and down the stairs. That’s when he plants his lips on yours, firmly, so that you can feel it in your knees.

“I need to go get my suitcase inside.”

“Do you always carry everything with you wherever you go?”

“I’m headed straight to the airport from here. Catching a red eye back.”

“Skip it. Leave tomorrow.”

“Just like that?”

“Sure. I have a really nice room.”

“I know you do, I booked it.”

“Always taking care of me, aren’t you?”

“Oh wow, he noticed.”

He kisses you again, a little longer, digging his fingers into your back, and your body melts against him of its own volition.

“I’m not coming back if everything is just going to go back to the way it was, Jay.”

“I didn’t come running after you because you’re good at managing my schedule.”

You give him a sceptical look but you can't entirely keep from smiling.

“Look at me,” he grins, “I’m a god. Any woman would want me and you have me. You should feel like you won the lottery.”

“Yeah,” you drawl, letting him wrap an arm around you as you walk away together, “I won.”

[theblurrxdface]

Spoilers for Life Is Strange True Colours/3. Specifically about how the powers work, but I've tried to keep the rest non-specific

A review, that I'm perhaps posting to the wrong audience, however I believe this game is really interesting even if you'd never consider playing a game in your life. No gaming skill is required. Watching it like a film for free online is entirely possible but you won't get to make your own choices. However the modern motion capture and voice acting and graphics make that still a very viable option. I recommend Eurogamer on YouTube for a pleasant, thoughtful playthrough.

The latest stand-alone Life Is Strange game has a protagonist with the superpower of empathy. Yeah, a bad name that doesn't sound like a superpower at all and had many perspective players unenthusiastic in the build up to the launch, but Alex's abilities are very much supernatural. Capable of seeing people's strong emotions as an aura, Alex lives with the blessing (or curse) of being able to feel what they feel to the point where she can read their thoughts in relation to these strong emotions. She has had an incredibly tough upbringing involving the care system and unwillingly feeling many unwanted and unmanageable emotions in these environments, causing her to get into repeated trouble. At 21 she's in a position to start over when a sibling finally tracks her down.

Throughout this small town mystery she goes on to develop her power, as other Life Is Strange characters with abilities have done, gaining the ability to see the world through the eyes of people in these strong emotional states to truly understand what is going on with them. She realises she can help with her power rather than just be helplessly overcome by others' emotions. Whether that be a child's imagination running wild or an elderly woman losing her memory, Alex is able to see and feel it and then help resolve it. And it looks amazing with beautiful graphics and in the format of an interactive game you can walk around in and truly explore through Alex's eyes and their eyes.

Each chapter features objects with emotional memories linked to them that Alex can also 'read' to gain insight into the characters around her and contribute to the ongoing story. Unlike previous LIS games, a small touch has been made where looking at items again at a different point will appropriately change her mental observations on them rather that just playing the same recording of ther thoughts on the item forever. It makes exploring far more interesting. I looked at everything.

A darker twist on Alex's powers occur when we are presented with a character consumed primarily by anger, a loved one has died, she can't help but blame people who were around at the time who she knows aren't really at fault (including her son who is probably about 10), she hates them all and hates herself for it, she feels she has failed as a mother. She's in a very dark place. A potentially dangerous one. Alex figures out she might be able to take these feelings away and absorb them for herself, but the consequences of this are unknown. At the time I expected the anger to take a toll on Alex, and I thought how dark it would be if we left the other person devoid of emotion. But I didn't think the game would go that far. So I opted to take on her anger, fearing she could be in danger otherwise. Unfortunately my worst fears came true and the character remained numb and dispassionate throughout my game while Alex struggled with the anger she took on. And yet, I still found myself backed into a corner later on where I hesitantly chose to use my powers similarly. Such is the power of LIS games upon their players.

Overall, I wouldn't be sure how to grade this installment of LIS out of 10. It's probably not my favourite of them, but it was very good. Initially I found the game too colourful and the animation a little too 'Pixar', it lacked the classic LIS art style and the whole vibe seemed too lighhearted. But it grew on me quickly, the colours and expressive faces make sense for a game about emotions, and the story quickly developed into something deeper. This is the most expensive game they've released so far, especially if you're like me and can't resist the Ultimate Edition of it (complete with remasters of the old games and an extra chapter so there is at least actual content for your money and not just cosmetic stuff), but LIS games go on sale all the time and usually start giving away the first chapter free after a few months/a year-ish. So if you're interested should you buy? Yeah, I think so, you can always start with a base edition and upgrade, or watch the first half an hour on YouTube and see if it captures your interest first.

Before I go, I want to clarify that I do know that non-supernatural empathy is a minefield for many people in different respects, and I'm not trying to be dismissive of that. Simply the name of this superpower seemed to generate less buzz than its predecessors of telekinesis and time travel which I think is also fair until you understand what it consists of.

I originally wrote this review for my Facebook where 3 people read it and that was more than I expected, I don't know if it'll gather any attention here either. On the off chance it does and you'd like my take on any other games I've played, let me know. I've enjoyed writing this. I even have vague thoughts about a side-blog. And if you enjoyed this, please like it, reblog if you can, and don't steal my writing. Thanks guys.