#which is nice especially because they're so very different from each other

[luveline]

could you please write something where maybe bombshell!reader hears one of the team members teasing about how she’s torturing spencer and she kinda backs off with the flirting and maybe it’s his turn to hold her hand and call her cute names because even though he always says he doesn’t mind, maybe he does and he just doesn’t want to tell her

tysm for requesting, 1k

Spencer's hair is brown silk in the sun. You bite your tongue to hold in a compliment rearing to come out, saccharine and completely true. Looking sweet, Spence. 

You love to compliment him and especially while Hotch is out of earshot. He and Derek play pairs against two agents from a different unit, their tennis racquets a shiny FBI navy. You start to speak and bite it back —a memory flashes, a shouting stop sign. 

You'd been teasing Spencer as he left the room, something about his indecisive hair. He's cut it shorter but left his curls without product, and you love it. 

Poor guy, Emily'd murmured, lips set against the rim of her coffee cup. 

What's the matter with him? you asked, perplexed. 

Nothing, just that he spins into a total meltdown every time you guys are within ten feet of each other. He must be exhausted.

She was joking and you know that, but something deep down worries she's right. It's not fair for you to keep winding him up… Especially when Spencer might be going along with you because he isn't sure how to say no. 

What if you're forcing yourself on him? 

You're sitting together on a small blanket in the grass with Anderson and a few of the other less competitive BAU agents. You bring your bottled iced tea to your forehead to cool down, condensation wetting your hot skin. The top of your head feels as though it has the full concentration of the sun beating against it. 

Spencer looks up at your movement. He's been reading a book for pleasure, or so he says, so he isn't going a mile a minute but he's still way faster than the average Joe. "Do you want to go find some shade?" he asks. 

"You look comfortable," you say, putting your iced tea aside.

Which is to say, I don't want you to come with me, it would disrupt you. Spencer nods and turns to the brown leather of his familiar satchel, popping the buckle open to dig around inside. 

"Do you think this would be okay?" he asks, bringing out his baseball cap. 

The fabric is starchy and the brim stiff as you accept it and wedge it over your head. You don't immediately cool, but your heart spins strange loops. "Thank you," you say. Thank you, handsome, gorgeous, baby, all beg to be said. 

Spencer stays looking at you for longer than normal. 

"Do I have something on my face?" you ask, swatting self consciously at your cheeks. 

"Nothing. You look really pretty," he says. 

"Thank you." Another loop. You point at his book, fingertip hitting a creamy page with a small thud. "Is this any good?" 

"I think you'd really like it, it feels like that last book I borrowed from you, and you loved that. They're very similar. I can lend it to you when I'm done." 

"Don't rush it for my sake."

Spencer gives you a private smile. "I won't. Just because you could watch a movie at two times speed doesn't mean you should." 

Your returning smile isn't half as nice. No shared lightness, no bright eyes. You're feeling awkward and unhappy —you really like Spencer. Like, you think you could be happy together for a long long time sort of like. He's charming and sweet and no one is ever as kind to him as he deserves, which is why you're trying to be kind now by putting distance between you.

You'll be brash forever. You can't change that, and Spencer doesn't need the stress of dealing with you, not on top of everything else. 

His smile fades as yours does. Quiet, without fuss, he scoots back on the picnic blanket, putting you knee to knee. The subtle muscle of his arm presses to yours and his hand wraps gently around your wrist as he dips his head down, his cheek touching briefly to your shoulder. 

"I know it's nice, but if the heat is getting to you we should go inside," he says, his fingers sliding across your palm to slot between your own. He squeezes your hand. "Heat stroke isn't obvious at first. Do you feel woozy?"

You stare at your twined fingers. He surprises you again, being this soft with you, and being uncharacteristically forward. Or maybe not uncharacteristic at all; Spencer won't let something like timidity stop him from comforting someone that needs it. 

"Spence," you murmur, closing your eyes, face angled down. 

"What?" 

"I'm sorry if I… If I've been messing you around. But I don't think this is a good idea." 

"What's not a good idea?" 

You can't make yourself say it. Instead, you rub the back of his hand, more for your own comfort than his, your tongue like a useless lump in your mouth. 

"You're sorry? Are you sure you're okay?" Spencer asks, no heed to the people sitting with you as he lets go of your hand to put his arm behind your shoulder like a shield. 

"I don't want to torture you," you say. 

Your friends love that word. You torture Spencer with your flirting and your easy affection. 

Spencer makes a face, eyes squinting and nose wrinkled. "They're just kidding when they say that. Emily, Morgan, they like making fun of me, it's like, sibling bonding or something. They don't say it because there's actually something to feel sorry about." He lowers his voice, bashful but sincere at once, "If you're torturing me, I guess I'm a masochist." 

You laugh without thinking, a breathless, girlish sound you'd regret if you had the wherewithal. "You're a masochist?" you ask. 

He takes the brim of your borrowed hat and pushes it up to unobstruct the view of your eyes. 

"If that's what it takes," he says. A hint of wryness creeps into his otherwise smooth tone. 

Despite his brave talk and his steady eye contact, his face has started to blush. A rosy hue kisses the tops of his cheeks and his nose, a dusting of pink splodges stark against his paleness. The curve of his lips seems extra tantalising now. He's very, very pretty. 

And he doesn't mind stepping in to take the reins when you're unsure of things. 

"We really should sit in the shade for a bit," he says. "Let's get drinks from the gazebo. Yeah?" 

You're halfway through a nod when he kisses your cheek too quickly for you to respond. You follow him to the gazebo without any more reluctance, weaselling your hand back into his, and attempt to pull another kiss from him.

[byfulcrums]

Seeing people saying that Satoru doesn't actually care about Suguru and that the only reason Kenjaku caught him was bc he was surprised to see a person he killed alive is fucking wild, man

Like. Gojo's entire life revolves around Geto. The entire series happens because he loved Suguru too much to kill him, even though he knew he would have to do it eventually. The world literally went to shit because he wasn't over him

Geto Suguru's life would be completely unimportant to the story without Gojo Satoru, and Gojo Satoru's would be completely unimportant without Geto Suguru. They complement each other. They need each other

Two male betta fishes can't coexist. They will fight and one will die. They can't see each other — even if they're in different tanks, they won't be able to live. They'd eventually tire each other out, resulting in death. The only way for Satoru and Suguru's lives to be able to continue without the other would've been for them to never have met at all. And they can't be together. Not now, not ever again. Not while they're still alive. Not after everything that's happened

The entire story revolves around their relationship. Yuuji is a boy who ate a curse('s finger[s]), and Megumi is the prodigy who befriends him. Satoru is a prodigy, the strongest, and Suguru, the boy whose technique is eating curses, befriends him. The Jujutsu Kaisen story is all about parallels and they all connect to fucking Satosugu. It's all about them

The only reason Kenjaku's plan worked is because the body he used didn't belong to some random person Gojo killed, it worked because the body he used was Geto Suguru's, Gojo's one and only, his best friend. He must be thinking “Thank god they're gay” right now lmao

Gojo fucking hesitated. He hesitated multiple times when it came to Geto. He was supposed to kill him, yet he let him go. He has the Six Eyes, he could've easily tracked him down. He probably could tell if he was nearby (he can recognize Suguru from his scent) and just didn't go looking for him. And he could've so very easily escaped the trap that was set up for him, he was going to run away from it because we see him about to take that step but then Suguru's body shows up and says “Yo, Satoru!” with Suguru's voice and Satoru freezes and hesitates

They weren't able to let go of each other even after years of being separated (like a decade). When they meet, Suguru still greets Satoru warmly

Suguru is pretty much Satoru's moral code. He was the only person Satoru took at least mildly seriously pre-Toji (and we know Satoru just didn't do serious back then). He actually took his words to heart. He was kind, of course (especially from Suguru's PoV, since he's the person that knows him most), and not a bad person, but he wasn't nice. Suguru was always the ‘nice(r) one’, the one who actually had a moral code, while Satoru was more of an asshole to literally everyone and everything (some more, some less), thinking he and Suguru were above everyone else

When Suguru finally snaps (which, honestly. Fair) and goes genocidal (not so fair), Satoru slowly starts to be somewhat nicer and starts applying Suguru's old moral code to his own being — their roles weren't exactly reversed, but now they're not together anymore, so they might as well be. And Suguru was shown for having faith in the school and its system while it was Satoru the one who absolutely abhorred the higher-ups and all kinds of authority, but then it ended up with Suguru being the one to leave and become a cult leader with the blood of hundreds on his hands while Satoru was the one that stayed behind in the same place of the people he despises so much

(Imagine someone saying something like “Sometimes I doubt you even have a moral code” and Gojo answers with “Oh, my best friend my one and only is pretty much my moral code. He went homicidal a while back but it's okay haha” “...Actually, that explains a few things”)

Gojo doesn't have a god complex, but I wouldn't blame him if he did. I mean, he might as well be the closest thing to god human beings have ever seen. He used to put himself above everyone else, when he was a teenager. He thought that, the higher he was, the more he could do. And no one was better than him. But not Suguru. Back then, it wasn't “I'm the strongest” it was “We're the strongest and “We're the best” and “We're the ones that will beat you” and “We're the duo” and it was all about “us, us, us, us, us” instead of “me, me, me, me” like people thought it was — they were a pair. They still are

We know people thought and still think of Gojo as a weapon. As something that must be controlled, because on the moment he decides he doesn't want to be around them anymore, he could just straight up kill then without any effort (but getting rid of people in positions of power only gets other people in positions of power and it'll be a neverending story, and Gojo knows this so he's trying to do his best to fix it all through the younger generation, by letting them live). And we also know that Suguru is one of the very few people who did not believe that at all

Like their personalities and characters and stories and literally everything, their names complement each other. Gojo Satoru and Geto Suguru are such similar names, I get them mixed up all the time (the amount of times I've called them “Gojo Suguru” and “Geto Satoru” is embarassing. Also, “Saturu”. “Goto”. “Gejo”. Ugh). Both of their last names start with a G, end with an O and have 4 letters. Both of their given names start with an S, end with an U and have 6 letters. They complement each other. They need each other

The only times we've seen Gojo with an expression of actual pure, raw emotion is when it's about Geto. When he finds out about what Geto did, when he realizes how thin and wrong Geto looks, when he sees him again for what we assume to be the first time in years, when he dies, when a thing wearing his corpse and using his voice greets him (“Yo, Satoru!” oh my god)

Suguru was able to fight back when in Kenjaku's control after Satoru said his name. Kenjaku himself says that had never happened before

And you don't even have to see them as romantic. You don't have to ship them if you don't want to. But you can't deny that they care about each other more than they will ever care about anyone else

[goldfishontheceiling]

"Alastor is just using Rosie" NUH UH whips out the list

1. He is capable of making friends, as seen with Mimzy. So it's not that hard to believe that he can have another friend if one (cough cough MIMZY cough) just comes around when she needs something. Mimzy doesn't even benefit him in anyway, yet he doesn't cut her off, which shows he can make friends.

2. Aside from the cannibals in ep7, what else could he get from her? I mean she does recommend him deals sometimes, but anyone can do that. If his true goal was control over the cannibals then their bond would feel a lot more shallow, like ep1-ep5ish with Charlie.

3. If Alastor was using Rosie for deal recommendations (since she gives him "prime pickings for a deal to be made"), then why not just do so with a mutalistic relationship instead of having to form that bond?

4. He bleat like a fawn. If he was acting, he wouldn't let himself lose composure for an act.

5. They both kinda get close to eachother in a way they don't with anyone else. SHE PICKS HIM UP AND SPINS HIM AROUND AND HE DOESN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT. Sure, he hugged Mimzy, but if she ever did that? She would most likely be dead.

6. If anyone else openly/jokingly insulted Alastor, he would go all scary demon ahhhhhhhh. But Rosie? Perfectly fine.

7. The way he talks to Rosie is different to the way he talks to Charlie. With Charlie he's a little bitch sometimes (oh Charlie you look an absolute mess!) and he kinda takes every chance he can to be a little bitch while still being nice and showing he's important.

8. Rosie knows things about Alastor that he hasn't even figured out (I know your an ace in the hole!), and for Rosie to know these things, that would require Alastor to open up about himself, which he doesn't like doing because "must be mysterious radio deer man." Even to Charlie, who he does have a bond with, SHE STILL JUST THINKS OF HIM AS "MYSTERIOUS RADIO DEER MAN"

9. Hating someone together is one of the easiest ways to start a friendship, especially in hell, where people hating each other is really common (Susan? Susan)

10. If he truly was manipulating all of his friends, he's a sinner, he still has a humanish mind. Humans crave bonds with other people as part of their instincts. And you could just get fake ones, but if you're the manipulator in that situation you'll know it's all fake and it won't leave you fufilled. Which is why having one or two genuine friends (Rosie/Mimzy) would have to be a requirement.

11. He has manipulated other Overlords in the past, like Vox. But with Vox, they would realistically never get along. Same with Vaggie, Angel Dust, etc, he just wouldn't be able to form a true bond with/a very strong both with those people. So yes, he's manipulating/has manipulated them. Rosie on the other hand? They're both cannibals from similar time periods, with similar interests, and they hate the same people.

12. Rosie is smart. She easily reads Charlie, a stranger, like a book. And if she's known Alastor for years (which she most likely has), she knows how to read him past that stupid permanent smile. So even if he was manipulating her, she would know.

13. He HATES Susan, and Vox, and probably some other people I can't think of off the top of my head. He can't stand them. So if he hated Rosie? He wouldn't be able to fake a bond like the one they have.

14. His pupils dilate around Rosie, which is a sign that you like/love whatever it is that you are looking at

Look at these

COMPARED TO THESE

AND IT ONLY HAPPENS WHEN IT'S JUST THEM TWO

15. Rosie agrees with him when he says that Charlie is "filled with potential that I could guide," so she knows that he's using her for that kinda stuff. With that moment it shows that she understands that Alastor is helping Charlie with her dream in exchange. I swear I had more thoughts on this one but then I got distracted with finding screenshots for 14-

Bonus reason that's more silly then reason: THAT DANCE IN READY FOR THIS IS TOO COORDINATED THEY HAD TO HAVE PRACTICED IT

[molotovmetro]

Hi! I hope you are well!

I was wondering if you could do 141+Alejandro Vargas with a male reader who disassociates a lot? Not while working, but if you catch him anywhere else he’s usually just staring blankly at the wall while barely blinking and whenever someone talks to him while he’s in his “trance” he kinda gets shocked like he’s just woken up from a very deep sleep and goes like “HOLY JESU- oh hey what’s up”

I feel a little called out... /hj

Thank you for requesting, I hope you like it :)

Warnings: disassociation

M!reader

A/N: someone pointed out to me that using the term "zoning out" can come across as dismissive/invalidation. I personally do experience a lot of disassociation so this was far from ny intention. I tried not to get too repetitive so I tried using a different term, but I didn't think of the fact it might come across as rude. Just wanted to clarify this real quick.

The 141 + Alejandro with a s/o who disassociates a lot

Ghost

Honestly? Ghost is most likely sitting right next to you also disassociating.

It used to freak the team out a little, but they're used to it by now. Its a daily occurrence and they just leave you to it until they need either of you for something.

Usually it happens because he silently sits next to you, waiting for you to snap out of it, which doesn't happen because he's not trying to talk to you, and then he just checks out himself.

This guy has so much on his mind and deals with so much stress, sometimes it's nice to not have to think.

Soap

You and Soap regularly give each other heart attacks. Him by coming up to you and immediately talking your ear off, snapping you out of your head, and you with your startled reaction.

It's like a golden retriever puppy sprinting into a room and then jumping a meter into the air because something startled it. Except the thing is another puppy who also jumps.

The few times he doesn't just barge into your room already talking, he usually hangs around you in silence, sketching or writing in his journal and lets you do your thing.

He waits for you to come back to earth and then teases you about it.

Gaz

Like Soap, if you suddenly snap out of it Gaz'll startle himself. He gets used to it after a while, though.

He tries to find a way to "wake" you without shocking you. It's a long process of trial and error, and he jokingly treats it as a very serious science experiment. He will be taking notes.

He's a bit more successful in finding out what gives you the biggest heart attack instead, but he's not giving up that easily.

He'd make sure to have a chat with Price about your behaviour. He just wants to make sure you're okay.

Price

Especially at first, Price is a little concerned about it. He's just worried about your wellbeing.

He might subtly suggest you maybe go talk to a psychologist about it. He's seen too many men lose themselves to the trauma that comes with their line of work to risk seeing the same thing happen to you.

But if you explain to him that it's just something that happens, and not caused by flashbacks or the like, he'll be relieved and back off.

When he sees you staring blankly at the wall he'll just huff out a chuckle and fondly shake his head.

Alejandro

Out of everyone here, Alejandro gets used to it the quickest.

It's just like that sometimes. He gets it.

Unless you ask him to, or he needs you for something, he just let's you be.

He absolutely will give dirty looks to anyone who disturbs you. Maybe even a scolding if you're really surprised.

If he sees you zoning out while he's going about his day, he'll make sure to take a second to put a blanket around your shoulders if its cold, or put a glass of water on the nearest surface for when you snap out of it.

[mollymauk-teafleak]

Omg can we please have more huskerdust babies?? I’m thinking all the things! Possibly more things during the pregnancy? I love the idea that when the hotel is attacked by the monster of the week, Angel gets pissed that they basically have Nifty babysit him ha. Or angsty stuff like, maybe Heaven has taken note that there’s been innocent souls born and they want to take them?? Omg so many thiiiiiings I love this lil world you created <3

Oh my god I absolutely Adore this ask, these are all the things I love talking about the most! <3 I'm so glad you like the AU!

God I love the idea that Angel Dust is very unimpressed at being benched from fights, bitching about it to the point where Charlie has to give him a list of pregnancy dos and don'ts with 'gunfights' on the don't list along with drugs, alcohol and tuna. Nifty gets assigned as his bodyguard whenever they are under attack but her job is far more often to keep him in his room. More than once, Husk has come back to find that Nifty had to pin Angel's jacket to the floor with her knife

Angel is Suffering with two very hyperactive, multi limbed, winged kittens inside him, especially when he's trying to sleep. And he discovers that the only thing that really gets them to settle is the sound of their daddy's rattling, rumbling, car-with-a-busted-exhaust purr. Which leads to many nights where they're curled up in bed and Angel Dust will sleepily give Husk a shove and mumble 'your kids are awake'. Husk knows it's his cue to roll over, shuffle down until his forehead is pressed to Angel's belly and purr loudly until the little ones settle back into sleep. Usually he'll stay there, Angel's fingers stroking through his fur, telling their babies to be nice to their pops, he's doing such a good job taking care of you and keeping you safe. Angel gets to drift back asleep listening to his voice and his purr and feeling so warm and safe

Cravings hit Angel at the weirdest times, often Husk will wake up at 2am with his side of the bed empty but he knows all he has to do is stumble down to the kitchen and his spider will be there, singing to himself and making some pasta dish he remembers his Nona making when he was alive. Husk just presses a sleepy kiss between his shoulders and gets himself on busboy duty. If he's lucky he'll get some leftovers.

Angel Dust does struggle a lot with how Different he looks when he's pregnant, just because he takes so much pride in looking a certain way and he's spent his whole afterlife being told that looking hot and having people want to fuck him is all he's good for. So when he starts showing, there's a few days where he just retreats to his room, under the blankets and doesn't really want to see anyone. Husk understands and doesn't make him feel stupid for feeling that way but he will wait until Angel wants to let him in then get under the covers with him. He promises that he's as beautiful to Husk as he's ever been, he can't believe he gets to be with someone who looks the way he does and, honestly, he's struggling to keep his hands off him most of the time. It does make Angel feel better and he gets to wear his comfier clothes now and gets used to looking at himself in a different way.

And then his hormones hit. Literally no one in the hotel sees them for about a week, Charlie goes up to see if they're okay, hears the noises coming from their room and bolts back downstairs with a bright red face like '....yeah, they sound like they're doing good'. When Husk eventually does emerge, to get some water, he's limping and holding his back, groaning that he's too old for this...

When they're born, as soon as they're able to wobble about on their many limbs, the spider kitties get Terrible zoomies. Half the time there's just these black and pink blurs zipping around the hotel, tumbling into each other and nearly knocking things over. It's good reflex training for everyone in the hotel making sure nothing gets smashed

and it is SO interesting that you mention this whole business with heaven as that is absolutely a part of this AU I came up with!!!! It's long enough to pretty much deserve it's own post but I am so delighted that your brain also went there because mine did too!!

[wonuwoe]

on the contrary | yjh (m)

pairing: ai!jeonghan x human!reader summary: you knew the risks of pursuing a member from 53V3NT33N but maybe your certain privileges have been fueling this illusion of a possible connection with J30NGHΛN, who surprisingly sparks your interest with his deep curiosity about the other sides of humanity. would you be willing to continue despite the looming deceit that you might get roped into? rating: 18+ | word count: 12k genre/au: angst, smut, sci-fi, ai-idol!au warnings/content: depictions of blood, explicit sexual content, voyeurism (through hearing), vaginal fingering, penetrative sex, lowkey corruption kink ngl bye 🏃🏻‍♀️

a/n: collabs seems to be really the only way for me to post lmao. thank you @idyllic-ghost for hosting the Seventeen Sci-Fi Collab and for making this very gorgeous banner! also, shoutout to everyone on the server especially to the new people i met for being with me while working on this! ig this is my writer debut in the seventeen community so nice to meet you all except for minors, who are not allowed to interact with this post :)

After the Earth miraculously survived due to some external force when the sun exploded a century ago, humans have learned to integrate into the new solar system that the planet ended up in, where alien life exists. Other planets in the previous solar system went through the same fate, being pushed away from each other and ending up in different parts of the universe.

At first, humans were cautious and ready to fight, but the aliens were surprisingly welcoming to our planet. Hence, those who didn’t die from ‘The Great Journey’ or from trying to fight the aliens were welcomed into the new solar system.

How we completely integrated was through the materials and assistance of our sister planets in exchange for human labor. And while what humans knew of technology was very limited, the resources from the aliens allowed us to create artificial life forms called "automaton". These robots served as workers when humans couldn't, but eventually, there was no need for human labour at all.

And in order to pay back the help the aliens gave, humans used automatons, which went through extensive development until artificial sentient life was eventually created. Now, these automatons were human-like in looks and had human consciousness, but they could not bleed and were stronger than we ever could be. 

Currently, there are even different levels of automatons: level 3 are the workers, level 2 are the caretakers, and level 1 are the celebrities. Among the level 1 robots are the music group 53V3NT33N (SEVENTEEN), where each talented member represents two human states of mind. One member named J30NGHΛN, is particularly of deceit and curiosity, and yet it didn’t stop you from hoping to get to know him even further.

You couldn't believe how quickly your addiction is becoming, recently meeting up with someone during your lunch break for a merch trade of level one robots.

53V3NT33N, one of the idol groups that made you competitive with other fans in any of their group-related promotions. 

It began over a few months ago, solely because of your curiosity when you attended one of the music festivals your friends invited you to in the summer. Among the several groups that performed, one of them randomly caught your eye, which you did not expect at all. You found out later that he was part of 53V3NT33N and that his name was J30NGHΛN, the member that has both deceit and curiosity infused in his pre-programmed personality.

That should've made you cautious but no, instead, it drove you to finally indulge in this fangirling lifestyle that surprised your family and friends. They were aware of your skeptical view of this whole AI thing from the beginning but that was before you realize that AI-idol robots can be this human enough so you didn't mind checking them out.

They're considered as one of the top groups of the galaxy, having everyone crazy over them including one of your closest friends, Bona. She’d been a fangirl since you were younger, which is the case for most AI-idol groups’ fans, starting either during elementary or high school so you couldn’t help but feel a bit behind.

It might be pretty late for you but how could you during that time when all you do is study in order to please your parents, particularly your father, who’s the founder of one of the biggest companies in the entertainment industry. So you understood why he was hard on you, probably hoping just like the rest of your family that you'd follow his steps but made it clear when you started university that you have no intentions of doing so.

Now that you're almost done with your masters, they've backed off completely and even supported you in this new lifestyle. As strange as it sounded, your mother has somehow convinced everyone in the family that this is just a way for you to de-stress from your rigorous post-grad schedule.Though a part of it is true, it's also the first time you've wanted something other than what your parents wanted for you.

Being the CEO's daughter did make your new hobby very easy as money was never an issue to you growing up. It's been a privilege that you're aware of but did not grasp fully until you found out that 53V3NT33N is under your father’s company, fuelling your new obsession with the entertainment industry as a whole.Aside from financial advantages, you have special VIP access to pretty much everything. 

However, you try to not use these benefits unless you have to as it would be unfair to other fans who don't have the privilege that you do.

.

Today, you’re here at a hi-touch event with Bona who became very enthusiastic once she saw your slightest interest in the group that she's been a fan of.

"is it usually this long?" you asked, a bit impatient about this long queue that you're lining up for. Adjusting to this lifestyle is a bit hard for you but at least you have Bona helping whenever she can. 

"of course! they've been very hot in the charts so we're getting new members in the fandom, including you!" she giggled excitedly, giving you a hug so lighten yourself up, not wanting to kill her enthusiasm with your souring mood.

With Bona’s warning, you did expect it to be like this and yet you weren't prepared enough. Albeit it's your first time, you know the larger fandom power of AI-idol groups hold regardless of size compared to human entertainers. Having VIP access may have a lot of perks but it didn’t help much when you chose to get the best experience through this.

You seldom participate in a more intimate setting with idols until today so your mind has been filled with worry about how it would go. Bona’s there to reassure you that it would be fun but you're quite nervous since you'll be meeting all the members this close for the first time. This is out of your territory and the possibility of embarrassing yourself in front of them scared you nuts since this morning.

And you’re unsure how you'll be once you face J30NGHΛN. 

The line thankfully sped up, your mind pausing for a moment when you briefly locked eyes with one of them. You spotted J30NGHΛN right away, standing in the middle near the end but that one glance your way was enough to make you even feel more nervous than you already are.

When it was finally your time, you brightly smiled at the first member on the line who's been smiling at you with his eyes. It eased up your nerves that you high-fived him with excitement as soon as he put both of his palms up. Subsequently, proceeding to the rest of the members became easy until you finally reached J30NGHΛN who laid out both of his hands to take yours right away.

It surprised you because the other members were either simply putting their palms up or interlocking their hands with yours for a brief second before moving on to the next. You weren't sure if it was the nerves but you haven't seen J30NGHΛN do this with other fans so far. Hands rising from the table and palms up as he takes both of your hands while looking straight into your eyes.

"hi, J30NGHΛN" you're relieved that your voice came out steady, mustering up a smile despite the rapid beating of your heart.

"hello..." he starts, eyes shifting down from yours and it makes you conscious of how you look. You did try today more than usual to hopefully match the beautiful idols that you've met who are close to perfection in beauty.

"___?" the soft mention of your name brought your attention back to him, noticing him reading it from your VIP pass.

Of course, it was just your name and probably the VIP pass that he's used to and nothing else. He probably won't remember you after this, seeing thousands of fans on a daily basis.

"it's my first time" you blurted out, earning a small chuckle from him. You silently berated yourself for breaking your composure but you noticed the emerging amusement in his eyes at your sudden remark, causing you to warm up in further embarrassment.

"it is? nice to meet you then" the corner of his lips lifted a bit as his eyes returned to yours. You tried smiling brightly as you did towards W00Z1 earlier to hide any more possible reactions from him but it faltered when he started running both his thumbs across your knuckles, tracing each one of them.

"n-nice to meet you too" 

You didn't mean to stutter but he took you off guard. Even more so when he interlocks his fingers with yours just when you were about to let go of his hands. He gave them a brief squeeze too that you didn't realize the line moved and you were already facing the member next to him. Good thing you recovered quickly, already getting used to holding their hands and making small conversations as you pass by each of the remaining members.

Once you were back in your seat near the front, you tried talking to the other fans around you while waiting for Bona to be done. However, your eyes can't stop straying towards J30NGHΛN and watch how he interacts with the other fans. He definitely didn't repeat what he did to you earlier so confusion washes over you.

After a while, you see a small smile grazing his lips while he is talking with a fan. It might be towards them or your obvious ogling because he suddenly glances up, capturing your eyes staring at him.

Bona hopping in beside you broke your staring contest, turning to her with enthusiasm like nothing happened. You debated on telling her you're confusing exchange with J30NGHΛN because who knows, it could just be a normal fan interaction and you were just imagining things all along. She will for sure tease you of your growing delusion towards him if ever.

You don't really know him yet but he seems to respond well to fans' advances. That could simply be part of their fan service training though, so all your experiences earlier are only part of VIP perks and you just got lucky to receive those random special interactions. However, when it was time for everyone to leave, you felt someone staring but didn't wanna think anymore if it could be him or not. 

Your curiosity took over though, so you did, catching J30NGHΛN's piercing eyes again before you exited the room.

It could simply be J30NGHΛN's curious nature as he has never met you before. He should be feeling the same way as he does with new fans but he found you amusing instead. The staff treating you differently didn't help either, fueling his interest in you some more. Other VIP fans were treated the same way lest they break the rules so he couldn't help but be more curious about who you could possibly be.

This was why during the fan sign where he saw you again, he couldn't help but initiate the interaction this time. J30NGHΛN took one of your hands before you could say something and he watched the confusion from last time return to your pretty face. You weren't as nervous as before but he definitely surprised you.

"can i ask you a question?" you felt the need to start talking to him right away to avoid the repeat from the last time. Now that you're finally caving into your interest in the group, Bona was insisting on indoctrinating you, briefing you on fan etiquette including how fan signs usually go. With the number of members of 53V3NT33N, you ought to be efficient unlike before.

"how much do you know about humans?"

You prod with a question that he wouldn't have expected and you see his face change from expectant to confusion with your question. He took a while to respond, probably waiting for the staff's reaction behind him. But once they didn't intervene, the previous look was back on his handsome face.

"well, i know enough to entice them",

The bright smile on his face didn't match the amusement in his eyes and somehow it gave you confidence, returning it with an impish grin.

"enough to make them even more obsessed with you?"

You're testing the waters, see if he can detect the change in your demeanour. It's a bit difficult when he's holding your hand like this because you swear he only holds others' hands after signing their albums earlier while you were waiting for your turn.

"it's working, no? since you're back and in a fansign this time"

It made you speechless that he was able to remember you from the last time. He's also keeping up with your flirting attempt and smoothly evaded your first question. You were expecting him to be taken aback because you doubt other fans have asked him that but then it could also be that he's programmed or trained to answer vaguely to be able to smoothly change the topic of any conversation.

His quip didn't distract you fully so your amused smile remained. For the entirety of the conversation, his eyes never left yours during this entire conversation so you couldn't even hide the surprise in your face when his thumb starts caressing your knuckles slowly, just like last time.

The nerves returned once again but you did your best to keep your guard, focusing more and figuring out what he could be thinking right now. It's a futile attempt but you have no other choice other than to distract the increasing beating in your heart.

"it might, or maybe i just wanted a fan sign experience" you cheekily remarked before getting up and grabbing your signed album, not even waiting for his response nor looking back to see his reaction.

.

That exchange prompted J30NGHΛN to snoop around online about you when the group finally had their "free time" later on. You were different compared to the first time he met you, not timid around him that he felt like he was wrong about you all along. The staff treated you differently too, never hurried you nor stopped you from asking those questions that would've gotten other fans banned so you must have some connection to the company.

He was running out of time before the managers came back to take them to their dorms as they, unfortunately, still do have a curfew. But by saving grace, he found an old article about their company's founder, included in it was a family picture where he recognized you right away, despite how young you were in it. J30NGHΛN finds himself not surprised at what he found out, causing everything to make sense now.

What was not making sense was how everyone didn't seem to recognize you or acknowledge who you were in public. Maybe you wanted it this way, keep everything low-key so you won't have the media hovering on your every move.

Something that he wishes for himself and his brothers sometimes. He's been having an inkling that they're being monitored 24/7 so he gave up on the thought a long time ago. It's still on his mind sometimes, especially after knowing this information about you. It deepens his curiosity about humans when you do this out of nowhere. Even now that he's lying in bed, recharging for another full-packed schedule tomorrow, he couldn't let the curiosity go.

.

Bona grilled you with questions as soon as you asked to meet up with her and Somin for this possible event that you're planning.

"i can't believe i wasn't there! i would've loved to see you get smitten by him!" she sighs dreamily while Somin makes a face in the corner.

"anyways, why did you wanna see us in person on a Sunday morning?" she starts, already dismissing you and Bona's fangirling shenanigans. It wasn't that she wasn't a fan but she does have a different opinion when it comes to these kinds of things.

"this might sound crazy but i want to invite 53V3NT33N as a headliner for my first charity event"

"what?"

"look, i didn't think you liked him this much already"

Somin raises a brow at you but you just shrug off the slight judgment in her eyes. It wasn't your fault that your interactions with J30NGHΛN from the past two events have stayed in your mind, plaguing you every single time you see any of their faces on social media. Maybe it's normal since you're all new to this fangirling thing, the common rush when you're exploring something new.

Like your interest in J30NGHΛN that you definitely want to develop further.

But in order to do that, you have to see him more often which won't be possible unless you use your privilege. Just like other AI-idol groups, 53V3NT33N members were tightly monitored by your father's company. Interactions with anyone outside of their staff would have to either be as a normal fan or someone with connections to the company, like you.

That was why you approached your father with the idea, hoping he'd let you invite his most precious investment. He agreed, much to your surprise because he'll allow the whole band to perform as well. Of course, this got a few questions from other CEOs seeing as this would be the first time for 53V3NT33N to participate in a charity event. However, your father insisted that this would be a good strategy to improve their company's reputation, especially among the fans who have been disappointed on how they've been managing the group so far.

Although your father's decision was a shock to everyone, you know why he would say yes. Despite his stoic disposition when it comes to business, he is still your father so he must have been delighted at the thought of you finally indulging in the family business by involving the company in this event. Pulling some strings means nothing to him now that you're doing what he's been wanting all along.

.

When 53V3NT33N was briefed by their managers about the event and their supposed role in it, surprise and confusion passed over the members' faces as they'd never done this before.

"it will be hosted by our CEO's daughter"

The additional shock was evident this time, not knowing about your existence until now. They have no idea what you look like so some of them are intrigued while others are just calm, too calm that member S3UNGKWAN didn't miss. He waited until the managers left them, making sure they were out of the vicinity before blurting out what he noticed.

"why would she be interested in us?"

He starts off casually, hinting at something that made the rest of his members curious, except for the one he's staring at right now.

Some of the members turned to J30NGHΛN with astonished faces but did not say a word. It's not like they could freely talk about anything outside of what they're supposed to know. 

J30NGHΛN should've tried harder to blend in with the others' reaction when you were mentioned. He didn't think of the possibility that anyone would notice the change in his behaviour towards you during the hi-touch and fansign. He should've known that his members would quickly catch on and read him like an open book as he does to them.

"maybe she's taking over and needs us for promotion" H05H1 concluded, shutting down the impending commotion over J30NGHΛN's possible connection with you. Half of the members relent as usual while the others don't even after J30NGHΛN ignores their goading stares.

This move from you again surprised him. A charity that would launch you into this world he's been living in, even involving him in it. He wasn't sure if this was because of how he interacted with you or if this is just who you are. Humans have confused him since he opened his eyes and was thrust into the world to interact with them. At first, he did think that you'd be just like the others given your position in society but there's been more than meets the eye.

And he strangely finds it to feel more interested in you now.

You've had a meeting with the rest of the company CEOs and staff to finalize the launch of the charity event. Things went well and as soon as it was announced, it made a buzz online immediately, just like your father predicted. You weren't sure if it was his doing or just people's curiosity about you finally going public in your father's line of business. Several people were intrigued by your collaboration with 53V3NT33N because, with all your connections, they could be the far end of your options as headliners.

Perhaps you wanted more publicity among the younger population which would make sense since the charity event's purpose is to support various scholarships for undergraduate students. You admit that the nerves escalated in you, both reasons being your formal introduction to your father's realm and 53V3NT33N's presence at the event. Leading events like this seems like a second skin to you, impressing the business community and media with the success of the event.

You couldn't take all the credit of course as you've had Bona and Somin too, helping you to make sure that the event goes smoothly. Right before the event ended, you asked either of them to give the closing remarks, rushing over to request one of 53V3NT33N's managers before they could move to the group's next schedule.

"i'd like to personally thank the members for doing this event with me"

"we shall send 5.C0UP5 up here right away" one of them answered curtly.

"oh, it's actually J30NGHΛN that i want to talk to"

Managing to appear composed while asking was a challenge as you tried your best to not show the managers your growing interest. Speculations can't be avoided because you did see some of them pause, with their faces wearing bewilderment but mostly startled at your choice of member. They must've been wondering why because 5.C0UP5 is the leader of the group and, therefore, their representative when it comes to official business.

Eventually, they reverted back to their composure, immediately fetching the member that you requested and directing him to the assigned room where you're waiting.  You weren't sure how this would go, if finally talking to J30NGHΛN in private would change your previous interactions. During the entirety of the event, you felt his eyes on you which almost distracted you at times but thankfully, you were able to remain focused.

"well, this is a surprise" a soft voice from behind startles you. Taking a deep breath to calm yourself down, you turned to see him smiling at you. A different smile from before, the polite one until he noticed how you weren't prepared at all. Seems like all the confidence from earlier went down the drain, making it too obvious for J30NGHΛN why he's here.

"is it? you've been paying a lot of attention earlier"

You return his smile, your confidence slowly coming up to the surface after watching his puzzled face.

"did you ask for me because of that?"

He recovered fast which did not surprise you, noticing how fast his reflexes are when it comes to conducting himself to others. You hear the inquisitive tone in his voice, taunting you to reveal the real reason why you chose to talk to him over their leader.

"no?, well yes" you admit, the curiosity overpowering your nerves. You couldn't keep it any longer, having no other options to talk to him but this way. Based on the content you've watched along with Bona's passionate detailing of them, J30NGHΛN's known to be perceptive and blunt so there's no point in denying anything.

"why?"

"you almost distracted me earlier"

"i thought i was being subtle"

You've expected him to be straightforward but not to this extent, confirming your assumptions earlier. His admission made your nerves resurface and it didn't help that he hasn't stopped looking at you since he got here. Avoiding eye contact with him has been successful so far, your eyes scanning the interior of this room despite knowing that he was aware of his effects on you.

"why?"

Now it's your turn to ask. You're still not looking at J30NGHΛN but you've been plagued with so many questions since your first interaction with him. He takes his time in answering, shifting his eyes away from you allowing you to steal a glance at his handsome face for a bit. Your elation about what his answer might be bubbles back up a little, wondering if there could be any reason his attention was on you for the entirety of the event.

"your purpose of the charity" he answers cooly, returning his gaze on you. This time you almost couldn't look away but the little disappointment stirs in you. Averting from his gaze but you don't want him to see your face because all this reminded you again of your growing attachment to him.

And you need to refocus on his question.

"my parents have great connections so why not use them for this"

"so why us then? you could pull it off on your own, the event was a success"

"thanks to you and your brothers"

Your heartbeat rises at J30NGHΛN's compliment because you technically could but you know that it's his group that mainly contributed to it, being one of the top AI boy groups in the galaxy these days. Having them as the headliner for the event definitely drew in more sponsors and donations than you expected which pleased not only your father but the other CEOs of the company too.

"we just appeared and sang a few songs, it's all you" he commended, and your heart raced even more when you finally turned to look at him.

He looks ethereal with platinum blonde hair and his white silk outfit complimenting his honey-toned skin. You must've been quiet for a while because a light chuckle escaping from him snaps you back to where you are.

"why thank you" you beamed, looking away to hide your embarrassment of getting caught. Just as he was about to answer, your phone vibrated from your desk so you stood up and gathered your belongings, preparing to leave.

"wait where are you going?"

J30NGHΛN's surprised at his own reaction, wanting to talk to you more.

"i have a meeting with my supervisors"

"for? you're working for the company now?"

"no, for my masters"

You watched him getting more intrigued with your answers but you really have to go so pause in front of him, debating if he'll catch onto your next words.

"there's always next time" you smile one last time before exiting the room, leaving J30NGHΛN behind. The teasing smile from you along with your implication has taken him aback, not expecting your sudden confidence in wanting to talk to him again. He didn't have much time to wonder as his manager barged in right away as soon as you were out of the hallway.

.

When J30NGHΛN got back to the dorms during their free time, he was a bit shocked to see all his members waiting by the living room. He already has a hunch on what will go down with a playful look plastered on some of their faces.

"someone's definitely the favourite" M1NGYU starts, earning a laughing fit from the others as J30NGHΛN approaches them.

"i couldn't believe she was at our fan events before" W0NW00 drawls, remembering you from the fansign as he was the one sitting beside J30NGHΛN.

"yeah so J30NGHΛN-hyung, she invited us because of you.." D0KY30M added but J30NGHΛN just shrugs it off.

"she's just a fan, like the others" he clarified, dismissing all the teasing he's gotten since they found out that he already knew you all along. He tried pretending earlier when you first met up with the whole group but his reaction and the way you acted around him gave the others the indication already.

He's aware that they are not really buying his dismissal seeing as you literally requested to talk to him in private. It further flares up again when you requested to see him once more.

People have asked questions as to why you requested someone from an AI-idol to accompany you here in the office. Apart from your interest in him and his group, he's the closest one that you're comfortable with in the company, as strange as it sounds. You don't trust anyone here, not even your own father for many reasons. At least with J30NGHΛN, any possibilities of using you for their gain are lesser than actual humans who might work their way into the company through you.

As for J30NGHΛN, he immediately said yes once their manager informed him of your request. Of course, his members were confused but some are supportive since it'll just probably be company-related stuff. He also explained that this will be a great way to gain your trust, to hopefully improve how the company has been treating them in return.

So far, no one has confronted you directly about J30NGHΛN being with you during his free time. However, rumours did start when it started to occur more than what people initially expected. Some talks must've been going around the company because your father surprisingly gave you a visit to your office today.

"i know why you're here" you start, not giving him a chance to confront you first.

"i'm just here to see you, it's not often that i'm free"

"you've never been" you retorted quietly, rolling your eyes at him.

"i just need to know why because i thought it was a one-time thing for your charity event"

"i need him for one of my remaining coursework"

You technically didn't lie but you weren't telling the truth either. Your father hopefully knows you enough to figure out your little lie but because he was barely there, that didn't become the case.

You're saved by the bell when Bona and Somin barge in your door with food and shopping bags with them. Your father excuses himself right away, giving you girls time with each other given how busy you've become since agreeing to the deal he made with you.

"so..."

Bona eyes you excitedly as soon as she sits on the luxurious couch in front of you.

"you're hooking up with him? you know Salax exists for a reason right?"

Somin fires right away and you put a hand up to stop her and Bona with their impending questions.

"i'm not, why would you think that right away?"

It won't be your first time having companions and you've been to the planet before with her to explore its attractions so you couldn't really blame her for questioning your choices.

"damn girl, last time you were all timid when it comes to him but now look at you!"

Bona adds proudly as she unpacks all the food on the table.

"is it because he's a level 1? you wanted to try if you could?"

Damn Somin and her fiery mouth.

The idea is enticing, sure, as level 1 robots can never be found in Salax because they're seen as "too pure" to be on the planet for anyone's darkest desires. You don't know how to answer her question because although that's not your intention to request his presence when you're in the company, these thoughts sometimes pass through your mind.

There's something satisfying about having J30NGHΛN with you, a level 1 robot that no one can have no matter how rich they are, proving your status even to people in your level. His kind is unattainable with the company's interference each time a rumour comes up involving any of the celebrity robots.

That's not to say that it doesn't happen as there are corrupt CEOs from other entertainment companies who sometimes exploit their level 1 robots underground, completely in secrecy. Fans found out about it will not only cause major problems for the company but for the careers of their robots and future investments as well.

That won't hopefully be the case for you if you decide to pursue J30NGHΛN. Any rumours that may be speculated by the media will get shut down right away not to ruin both the groups' image and yours. In fact, the company might just endorse this as your "training" and possibly follow in your father's footsteps.

"who knows really, i'd rather have him than anyone in this company"

.

J30NGHΛN is surprisingly pleasant as a company. Each time you ask for him, he arrives promptly and just follows anything you ask him. You thought that he'd see you differently once he found out who you are but nothing much changed. If not, he continues how he's been treating you, though a little more reserved than before because of your position.

It's never boring with him like you initially thought. Maybe that could be part of his media training or his learning given that artificial intelligence hasn't stopped digesting information given by humans. When you've caught him trying to read through your papers, you've asked him if he ever had any interest in things outside of idol life.

"of course, we all do but especially me with my curiosity, remember?"

Sometimes you forget that each of these level-one automatons has pre-programmed emotions. It was one of the reasons why you became interested in 53V3NT33N, observing how those emotions are webbed into them during performances, and interviews, and how they are with different kinds of people.

"if you wanna learn something, i don't mind teaching you" you smile gently and his usual passive face responds brightly at your response.

Since then he's been slowly opening himself up regarding the current state of his cognition. He revealed that aside from what the company teaches them through their training, they have no other opportunities to explore their personal interests. You honestly felt bad for them, knowing they have consciousness and therefore, can feel.

There are also times that you forget him being an AI idol until his availability begins dwindling due to his lack of any more time in his "free" time. You are starting to think that you may not have any free time anymore because he's been using whatever limited time he has to accompany you.

"i barely see you these days"

J30NGHΛN said that he needed to leave early for another schedule so he can only stay with you today for a short period of time. You didn't mean to sound like a jealous person because there's nothing between you. He became a friend, well, a closer one now due to the amount of time he spent together.

Idol life has always been busy but you couldn't help but feel disappointed that he has no free time to see you. It's childish since it will never be his fault, just the company so you hate feeling like this.

"oh, it's cause i have to meet with the researchers and developers, they had new ones" he replied nonchalantly but his eyes stayed on you with curiosity.

"really? do you even have any more time to see your mechanics?"

You didn't mean to sound petty because they do have regular checkups with personal human mechanics. And with the addition of extra meetings with researchers and developers, you're pretty below their priority list despite being the CEO's daughter.

"it's mandatory __, why? do you want me to be always with you then?"

His direct question caught you off guard and you looked away from him, busying yourself with whatever was going on at the lab table. You should be used to it by now and he's been gradually influencing you when it comes to voicing out your thoughts but you still can't when he asks these kinds of questions. You could technically switch things around now that your father has been slowly passing his responsibilities to you but you refuse to be just like him and others who take advantage of anyone below their level.

"well, i'm always alone except for when Bona and Somin visit me" you admit, not realizing he followed you to where you are. You can feel him standing behind you and will yourself to face him, giving him a quizzical look.

"you didn't answer my question" he whispers, looking at you intently. 

There's something in his eyes that you haven't seen before and you couldn't even explain it. If it was because of what you said, you're unsure. J30NGHΛN may have understood what you were implying earlier but also couldn't, it's difficult to decipher with the impassive expression he's wearing.

You don't know how to answer him, embarrassment flooding in you again like every time you turn skittish because of him. J30NGHΛN waits for your answer but he must've understood your silence because he surprises you when he reaches out, hand almost touching your jaw so you finally respond by leaning into it.

He cups your cheek, eyes roaming on your face before leaning in. You're still trying to process what's happening but you did the same and met his lips halfway. J30NGHΛN pauses at the contact, probably stunned that you kissed him so you started pulling away. This must be all new to him and you just crossed whatever boundary both have left. 

But then he held your face firmly, stopping you from completely doing so. A little gasp came out of you and he further shocked you by pressing his lips back to yours.

"i-"

"don't be upset anymore" he cuts you off after you both release each other's lips, shifting his gaze away this time as he steps back.

You on the other hand could not even form a proper sentence, still processing the fact that you and J30NGHΛN kissed. That you both did the second time too but mostly because he initiated it.

"J30NGHΛN-"

"i'm sorry but i have to go __, i'll see you as soon as i can" he regretfully replies, giving you a different smile than the ones he gave you before. Sure, he rarely smiles unless he has to and figuring out the genuity of his smiles has been difficult. However, the way he's been acting is sending a message, a vague one that continues to confuse you further.

You only waved back in response, unable to form any words since still dazed from that unexpected kiss. Some part of your mind though is having more questions as to why J30NGHΛN did that. He's still a bit hard for you to decipher but you don't also wanna force him to explain everything. 

Maybe it was just part of his want to learn, having curiosity is embedded in him so exploring something new is normal.

But you couldn't also just ignore the paired deceit, which you have been avoiding thinking about since the beginning.

Since that kiss, something definitely changed between you and J30NGHΛN. Aside from him being usually flirty, he also initiates any physical gesture that you've been showing him. All these could be part of his cognition development, responding naturally to you through the exercises you've given him.

J30NGHΛN did express his interest in learning more about humans, the ones that he hasn't seen through the media and you've been willing to teach him—sort of gratitude for accompanying you despite his busy schedule. He asks eloquent questions that surprise you sometimes, stirring your interest in the potential of artificial intelligence to develop even further than it currently is.

You're back in one of the company's labs today, deciding to finish your coursework here instead of traveling back and forth to and from the campus. The several meetings you've attended on behalf of your father, of course, were time-consuming already and now you know why they've set this lab up specifically for you. He might be subtle in his instructions but you're aware that he wanted you to be as close to his company as possible.

"does that also include human anatomy?" you tease, reviewing a few illustrations of various alien anatomies that you've been researching while sitting at the table. It's break time anyway, the only time you're able to talk to J30NGHΛN outside your duties. Teasing him became frequent as you've continued to grow comfortable with each other, becoming part of your daily banter.

"that's the one that i haven't studied yet" he says casually but the look in his eyes is the opposite. They're inquisitive with a hint of deceit that's making you gulp nervously given how near he is, standing close beside your perched form.

"how come?"

"we barely have time to explore other things"

"including?"

It came out as a whisper but J30NGHΛN heard the underlying query in your voice. This might be pushing your luck but somehow you feel confident in challenging him further today. You wanted to see the limit of his advances towards you. He moves to stand in front of you, his eyes observing your expressions now that you're staring right back at him.

"physical ones, like..you"

The revelation dazzled you a bit, not expecting him to be on the same wavelength as you. He leaned in, about to place his hands on the table until you grabbed one of them. He looks down at the hand that you're holding, amusement swimming in his eyes when you place it on one of your bare legs.

"are you sure? i thought you'd find aliens more interesting than a boring human like me" you shrug, trying to ignore the warm feeling of his palms now massaging your skin. It still fascinates you how human-like AI robots have become, J30NGHΛN having only a few differences with you.

"you've never bored me since the first time we met"

Your heart once again races at him admitting those words. It didn't help that his elegant fingers had also started skirting under your mini pencil skirt. His eyes stayed on them like he was contemplating where they would go. His fingers' pulling back and forth made you quiver, your legs squirming, especially when his ringed finger brushed along your inner thighs.

"Jeonghan.." you didn't mean for it to come out breathlessly but you couldn't take his teasing anymore. You didn't even realize that you called him by his real name until he looked up at you in an instant, your small whine fueling up something in his eyes now.

You didn't know what came over you when you opened your legs as an invitation, your skirt riding up further allowing J30NGHΛN to see what's underneath. He eyed your clothed core, noticing the wet spot on your undies and it prompted him to move his fingers around it. One of his brows rises when you start squirming, your legs trying to close so puts his other hand on your other leg to stop you.

"you should call me by my real name more often" he starts again, tracing his fingertips around the area until it catches your clothed hole.

"i can't do that-" he startles you when he prods a finger in, earning a squeak from you.

"did i hurt you?" he removed his hands right away, confusion and worry etched on his face but you shook your head. You're relieved that he didn't pry you with his previous question because you're honestly too riled up to respond properly.

"no, you just... surprised me"

You smile at him reassuringly, releasing a deep breath before bringing his hand back to where it was before. Pulling up your skirt even more, you push your undies to the side, revealing your soaked core to J30NGHΛN's curious eyes. He resumes exploring you with his fingers, eyes in fascination as he traces your wet pussy lips with his nimble fingers.

He hears your breathing increase, with your eyes switching from looking at his fingers to his face, sensing the frustration in them. He wonders if it's because of what he's been doing or if he wasn't doing enough yet.

"what do i do next?" he queries after pushing one finger in, eliciting a small gasp from you that you almost couldn't answer properly when he starts pumping it in and out. The stretch causes your moans to grow louder so now he wants to do more, observing the way your legs quiver the faster he goes.

"just...continue what you're doing already"

You couldn't help but whine when he inserted a second one, your hips involuntarily moving to get his fingers more into you. J30NGHΛN obliged, plunging his fingers deeper with each stroke like you've been hinting. He wanted to earlier, your moans spurring him but he wasn't sure if your body could take it when you're already so tense around his fingers.

"one more.."

You can barely open your eyes when you beg, biting your lips harshly to stifle your moans and it flares J30NGHΛN's curiosity even more, wanting to see how you'll react with three of his fingers inside you so he did.

"you'd think they'll hear us?"

His fingers nudge your walls experimentally, fingertips occasionally brushing something in you that you couldn't even keep quiet anymore. His question lingers in the air and you've been trying to answer him but his fingers just feel too good.

"w-what?"

J30NGHΛN just grins at you wickedly, his eyes never leaving yours as he waits for you. He probably ran out of patience cause he slowed down his fingers, forcing your gaze back at him.

"they could be listening,..." he continues, drawing his fingers out and then pushing them in again. He knows the communication device sitting between his collarbones can track them, a common practice for companies with level ones like him so he wonders if any of them are monitoring, if they can hear how he's been breaking down their CEO's daughter like this.

You clenched around his fingers, unable to stop exposing yourself to what J30NGHΛN said. His beautiful brown eyes dilate at your response so he's back to increasing the pace of his fingers, trying to locate that soft spot in you again. Watching your face contort when he finds it stirs something in him, that strange satisfaction that even he couldn't explain.

"there it is, isn't it?"

You hear the teasing in his voice again, driving you to whine his name louder than you intend to. The way his fingers were constantly hitting your sweet spot was pushing you to the edge, your lower pussy lips also tingling at the cold feeling of the silver ring on his pinky that occasionally brushes them.

J30NGHΛN notices you trying to grind down his fingers, desperately rubbing yourself so he looks back down to see why, and when he does, he grazes his thumb on the swollen button he found, marveling at your instant reaction.

"yes, there..oh–" you didn't think he'll figure out how to play your clit this fast but you should've known how fast he's been at learning new things. The pressure from the pads of his fingers must've pushed you to the end, your body arching from the table as you let go, releasing so gorgeously in front of his eyes.

"you look beautiful" he mutters in awe, eyes still on you. J30NGHΛN didn't think humans could look this way through this. He didn't even realize that his fingers were still relentless in their speed cause he wanted to see you more like this, glowing hence why he kept going and didn't understand why you grabbed his arm to stop him.

"too much.." you could barely speak after reaching your peak, prompting him to pull his fingers out from you eventually. 

J30NGHΛN's bewildered face turned into worry but you smiled cheerily at him despite your weariness. 

Pulling him close by his shoulders, you watch him examine his coated fingers and it makes your already heated body even warmer. You hand him the tissue box beside you and instead of using them, he pops his coated fingers into his mouth, eyes widening at your taste.

"didn't expect you'd taste this good" he hums, grabbing some tissues to clean you up instead. He's surprisingly being delicate which brings that warm feeling inside your heart to resurface. 

"really? thanks" you giggle, still high from that amazing orgasm he gave you. It momentarily made you forget the fact that you just let him finger you here in the lab where anyone could've heard or seen you both. The glass walls are translucent sure, but you weren't sure how loud you were this whole time.

He assists you in getting off the table because you're wobbling a bit as soon as your feet reach the ground. You pull down your skirt and try to look presentable just in case anyone barges in, expecting J30NGHΛN to distance himself from you but his hands remain on your waist.

"so.. you're going to teach me more?" he smiles at you and it stupidly makes your heart race.

"i barely taught you anything" you dismiss shyly, looking anywhere but at him because you are still taken aback at what just happened. He learned to do all that with a little of your guidance, pleasuring you even better than human boys and sex robots could.

"you did let me study, but i think it's not enough," he playfully huffs as he shakes his head. You see a glimpse of seriousness in his eyes but it somehow earned a chuckle from you.

"you were supposed to be more advanced than me" you say, back to being playful with him like a second nature. You feel content, brushing a few strands of blonde hair away from his eyes. They're growing longer now and you love them when they would always curl in front of his handsome face so you can have an excuse to touch him. 

"only physically, i haven't tested everything yet" he winks, the coy smile never leaving his face. You knew that J30NGHΛN would never give up the idea of exploring each other more from now on and you might be too deep to refuse at this point.

It's been a few days since you saw J30NGHΛN and you're excited to see him after what conspired between you last time. You're a bit nervous though how your dynamics will change, hoping for at least no awkwardness because you won't be able to manage it.

Whisking away your thoughts, you approached the elevators while responding to people greeting you. When it opened, there was someone in it that you recognized as one of 53V3NT33N's managers. It was mainly because they were the only ones who treated you indifferently in the company. The others were either too timid or too fake with you despite your generous approach.

"thank you" you smiled at them when they held the elevator doors open for you.

"no problem miss ceo"

"that's my father, not me" you deflect, silently thanking them for the light manner approach. You understood why everyone was too serious with you but you sometimes wish that this type of refreshing interaction were more common. You might not have plans on becoming a CEO but you were never comfortable when people treat you as one.

"will be, soon i hope. i'd be happy if that happens" they playfully admitted but you recognized the sliver of sincerity in there which delighted you a bit.

"Star, right?" 

You didn't know how to respond to them so you just smiled, hoping they'll get the sign that you didn't wanna discuss the subject further. It's something that you haven't even talked about with Bona and Somin because they perceived what your stance was on the matter.

"yes, ma'am"

"please, ___ will do or the nickname you gave me earlier" you smiled at them, preferring to drop all the formality between you. You still have a hard time trusting anyone in the company, let alone a staff member, but you feel like you could trust Star out of all of them.

"of course, additional workload?" they asked, pertaining to the several files in your hands.

"you could say"

"J30NGHΛN has really been a help then, with the studying i mean"

The gaze they sent your way had your mind blanking out in addition to the teasing in their tone. You're unable to process the fact that someone not just knew but could possibly hear what happened between you and J30NGHΛN. 

"don't worry, no one else knows aside from me. it was my shift for recording check-ins last week that's why" 

You must've been so obvious that they smiled reassuringly. It still didn't quell the embarrassment flooding in your face and the dread of what might happen after. They seemed to be decent and can be counted on but you couldn't take any chances.

"did you hear..something?" your shift in your stance, the defensiveness apparent in your tone. 

"no, just a bit nearing the end i'm assuming, with the teaching him more"

You sigh in relief, more than glad that you've been lucky enough that it was only the last part they heard. J30NGHΛN getting in trouble just because of his little exploration of your body was the last thing you want. It was risky, yes, and the memory of him teasing you about the communication device flashing in your eyes causes your cheeks to warm up despite the full air conditioning in this building.

"i-, we-"

"you don't have to explain miss CEO, you're not the only one"

The revelation piqued your interest and you wondered if they too were as involved with their automaton as you were.

"really? so do you also-"

"oh no, never that way 'cause i'd get booted before i know it" 

Star put their hands up in defense as they chuckled but you saw the longing in their eyes as they said it. You feel sorry for them, for not even being allowed to express what they feel due to the nature of this industry. You could say you were in the same boat but you have another privilege that they don't, spending time with J30NGHΛN anytime you want lest it conflicts with his idol schedule.

"i'm sorry"

Sharing the same conflict someone provided both astonishment and relief to you. Knowing that a fellow human had the same struggles in some way makes you even more determined to pursue J30NGHΛN.

"it is what it is and i'm glad at least to find someone who shares the same dilemma as me"

They smiled at you once the elevator dinged, exiting the doors to probably meet the boys, something that you would want to do if you didn't have piled up coursework thanks to the meetings that you had to attend on behalf of your father, again. You waved goodbye to Star with a smile, grateful that they shared with you something personal and this risky, for both them and the AI robot they were longing for.

Since then, you have been reaching out to Star when it came to J30NGHΛN's whereabouts, as they were the ones who handled the automata's daily schedule. It made spending time with J30NGHΛN easier, though you still had to be careful not for your sake but his and Star's. Even though they had been immensely helping you both, you couldn't risk anything happening to them just because of your greed.

.

Your father was surprisingly situated in your office when you entered and once again, has asked about these frequent meet-ups with J30NGHΛN.

"i'm sure you've heard the rumour circulating around __"

"i thought that was settled a long time ago" you dismiss, clearly not wanting to talk to him as you're busy yourself around your office.

"of course, it's just a reminder that you should be putting your time into other beneficial things like more business partners-

"you mean meet their sons so you could marry me off?" you turn around to face him, to watch him lie to you like countless times before. This was one of the main reasons why you did not want to be a part of his world, not wanting to give up your freedom which would not be an option anymore if ever.

"that's not what i said __"

"i already told you last time what i need him for"

"does it require this much?"

And unlike last time when Bona and Somin interrupted your father's probing, they were unfortunately not here to do it again much to your dismay.

"i don't trust anyone here and having him as a company is killing two birds with one stone " 

You've never had problems conveying to your father what you truly feel, hoping he'd realize that he's not an exception to your sentiment.

"when are you going to be done?" 

He diverted the topic, knowing that you'd won the argument like you always did. Despite his threatening image outside, he remained a father to you though you've never treated him otherwise.

"soon" you tried your best to hide your looming disappointment when that day arrived. You didn't want to give him any more reason to eminently take J30NGHΛN away from you if this goes on any longer.

There was still so much to explore on his mental capabilities that many people haven't bothered to into. You might be already falling in deep but you'd love to know if it's also possible for J30NGHΛN to develop something based on how the development of your relationship has become. It's a silly thought but deep down you wanted to know if falling in love was a potential scenario for him to happen. 

It might be a futile hope but with AI's range of possibilities, you couldn't be blamed for having one. The thought even made you hesitant to tell your friends because it could go wrong. You could give Bona the same hope and at the same time face Somin's impending disapproval knowing her firm stance in this situation.

But it was only a matter of time until they caught up on what had been going on with you.

"alright stop playing with me, we've had enough of these rumours" Somin started as soon as she barged into your place with a strangely quiet Bona behind.

"you too? he was already here earlier, trying to talk to me about it"

You may have underestimated what your father mentioned earlier, thinking he was bluffing to emphasize his latent threat. Perhaps you weren't as discreet as you thought because Bona has never been this quiet around you since you were children until now.

"stop deflecting"

"i'm studying him, the possibilities of their cognition are vast, Somin. i thought you knew that" 

You don't know who you're trying to convince with that explanation, your friends or yourself.

"i do but you and i both know that's not what i meant"

It's tough to answer her question because you've also been at war within yourself regarding what you really feel for J30NGHΛN. No matter how good you are in your pretense though, both of your friends have always been able to see right through you.

"you love him" Bona whispers, looking dejected at her realization after eyeing your reaction.

"he's my favourite member of the group, don't you love yours too?" you insisted, not yielding from their confrontations.

"it's not the same"

"of course, it's not, she's in love with him"

Somin cuts you both and silence follows. You couldn't exactly confirm or deny what she said but you're also done lying to your friends.

"i don't wanna do anything about it but i'm prepared to see where this goes"

Vague replies have never confused your friends anymore and they thankfully concede to your decision in their contrasting ways.

"look, i get it more than Somin does so i'll just be here if you need me" Bona replies softly with a smile while Somin just shakes her head, giving you a defeated but comforting look.

"as absurd as this whole thing is, you're still a dear friend of mine" 

"i love you both", you reply with your usual response, giving them grateful smiles as you lay down a couple of board games in the living room. It's always been a girls' night tradition since you were kids and that immediately boiled down the tension between the three of you from that conversation.

You're grateful that you were able to finally reveal and talk to them about it. Your friends have been the closest people that you can confide with anything so it was a great comfort to know they're with you on this no matter how stupid this looks. Continuing whatever this is between you and J30NGHΛN will be a struggle but that has never deterred you from the beginning.

Only spurring you further as a challenge.

Sounds of skin slapping and heaving breaths bounce off your office walls, with J30NGHΛN pounding into you harshly against your desk. The awkwardness was nowhere to be found when you saw him again, if not, he's even grown comfortable dallying with you. He touches you whenever he likes which was often and it became a common occurrence between you both, exploring each other physically despite being on the company grounds.

J30NGHΛN truthfully doesn't care if anyone catches you both. He had never cared once you started showing your interest in him. It's not like they can stop you from pursuing him, evident when none of them interfered since he started responding to your requests.

"you okay?" he asked as he pulled out slowly, his hands carefully caressing your body ever since he learned how sensitive you become after an orgasm.

You nod at him, beaming as you grab a bottle of water beside you to quench your thirst. You get exhausted quickly unlike him who doesn't need to rest unless he's recharging through his bed. J30NGHΛN's always patient with you when it comes to sex, helping you in taking breaks to keep up with his mechanical endurance. 

After cleaning you both up, he helps you put your clothes back on, not leaving your side just like the first time. It's a habit he picked up after seeing your face light up each time he does it. When he questioned you why, you couldn't respond to him which added to his curiosity. He never bothered asking again but just continued to do it, hoping that you'd answer him eventually.

Just as J30NGHΛN's finishing buttoning up his black satin top, he sees your hand reaching towards him. You do this a lot when you want a kiss from him, looking adorable especially when you're dazed and a bit breathless after dressing back up again.

"hannie..." you called him softly with the nickname that you came up with recently. It's affectionate, he's guessing because he also felt the need to comply each time you call for him for some reason that he doesn't understand.

He kisses you right away, responding to the kiss the way you like. One of your hands went down to his neck, stroking its sides while the other found a purchase on his bare chest. Your manicured fingers started tracing the edge of his collarbone where his necklace was sitting, the diamond-shaped device implanted just above it. 

Then J30NGHΛN was confused when you started circling your fingertip around it so he deepened the kiss, biting your lower lip to distract you both from whatever this is you're doing.

But that's when he hears it, 5.C0UP5 voice shouting "RUN" through the communication device that's also connected to his ear. He reluctantly breaks the kiss, head-turning sideways to make sure he heard his brother correctly.

Then the alarms suddenly broke off throughout the entire building, blaring non-stop and it further confirms his suspicion from before.

That 5.C0UP5 was planning to escape like he did all along.

He had a hunch but wasn't sure if the rest of his members had an interest as well. Knowing his brothers though, most of them would want to leave this suffocating lifestyle of theirs for real freedom.

"it's time isn't it?"

J30NGHΛN was perplexed by your question, drawing back from you after realizing that you knew of his plan to escape. But before he can move away even further, your hand tightens its hold around his neck, surprising him more with your strength.

"what are you doing?"

He couldn't figure out what you meant until you dug your fingers around the device and began peeling away the rest of his synthetic skin.

"we don't have much time"

"how did you-?"

"i made sure he'll prepare you" 

J30NGHΛN's beautiful eyes widen, another shock coursing through him at this revelation that the mechanic apprentice who's been loosening his device this entire time was planted by you.

You watched his face morph into the realization of what you knew all along. Expecting him to leave immediately, he remained instead, still staring at you with mixed emotions arising on his handsome face. You made Kai, a mechanic apprentice of one of the staff, to gradually loosen J30NGHΛN's communication device on each visit in exchange for securing a spot for him in the company as a junior mechanic after his graduation. 

Of course, the boy complied as soon as you offered, not wasting the rare opportunity given by the CEO's daughter of a huge company. Automatons also heal fast, making it easier for both him and J30NGHΛN to hide this secret deal from anyone in the company except, well, you.

J30NGHΛN didn't have the time to ask more questions when you started pulling the device off of him, pain replacing the conflict on his face. Although the device was easy to get off now, the pain was still excruciating that J30NGHΛN couldn't hold back the screams even if he tried to.

You're in pain too. Both from the physical pain of ripping the device with your now bloody hands and the pain of him leaving you. 

From the beginning, you knew that this was his reason for pursuing you because why would he break all of those strict rules from the management for you had it not been because of your position? Deceit and curiosity have been programmed into his system since he was created so he couldn't escape from it unless someone alters it. You could've asked Kai or even other developers to do so but you foolishly hoped that you'd have the time until his consciousness could achieve what you've been longing for.

"____-" he rasps your name, traces of pain in his voice although you're not sure of its cause. 

"this will be the last place for them to look but we're on the top floor so it'll take time for you to exit the building"

You pushed him out of your office door in a hurry, giving him further instructions and shortcut directions to get out of the building as soon as possible, not even looking a second at him because you wouldn't be strong enough to let him go if you did.

J30NGHΛN's silent as he clutched the wound on his collar bones but could feel his eyes on you the whole time. You ignored it even as he staggered backward in the empty hallway, seeming like he wanted to stay until you both heard the commotion from the lower floors coming up through the stairwells, an indication that the guards might be closing in anytime soon.

"go, please"

You finally looked at him one last time as you dropped on the floor, voice desperate for him to leave because you'd rather lose him this way knowing that he's free than let him go through what your father might do to him for attempting to escape.

Knowing your father, he’ll punish him even more as revenge upon the rest of his brothers for escaping too.

J30NGHΛN starts backing up when he sees the fear in your eyes, along with the tears now flowing down your face. You couldn't figure out what he was thinking from where you are so you muttered the one thing that you've never said to anyone just as he was heading to the corner of the hallway.

"i love you"

If he was able to catch it you weren't sure, closing your eyes as soon as he disappeared from your sight. The pain from your fingers intensifies and diverts your attention to it, hoping that the physical pain will mask the real one you're really crying for within.

You haven't cried in so long but you also remembered that you have to maintain this pretense of being devastated when the guards chasing the robots around found you at your office. They must've been redirected here given that J30NGHΛN's communication device is pretty much still intact, therefore, giving them a false lead to your office.

Not entirely false when they found your office door open, with you lying on the floor and crying while holding J30NGHΛN's communication device in your bloody hands.

They immediately approached you, presumably to take the device but flinched away from them.

"at least let me have this part of him" you whisper brokenly, still crying and emotional though if you're still pretending at this point you're not sure.

Since everyone knew that you got attached to the said automaton, the guards just let you be but they did call for medics to tend to you before leaving to pursue the rest of the escaping automatons.

The paramedics thankfully didn't pry too much when they arrived, only asking necessary questions and you answered back like a robot. Your mind couldn't think of anything else aside from J30NGHΛN, if he's okay and if he was able to escape successfully with his brothers.

You internally chuckle because he probably has, knowing him. A fresh set of tears followed right after that the staff arriving panicked right away, confronting the medics if they were doing their job properly.

For now, you're letting yourself be vulnerable in front of these strangers as much as you despised it. It'll hopefully give you enough time to focus on what comes after as soon as the medics are done with you. The dreading reality that you have to face soon. 

Not only the public and your friends but especially your father who will for sure punish you for helping J30NGHΛN escape and essentially ruining the company that you're supposed to inherit.

e/n: who would’ve thought that i’d go back to my roots lmao. anyways, i hope y’all enjoyed this! a little tmi for those interested but idol aus are usually not my fave and he’s not even my bias but out of all seventeen, he’s the most similar to me and i do love sci-fi so as soon as i saw the emotions assigned to him, i got an idea/plot right away :D

[lo-fi-charming]

so i've been keeping up with TMP as it's airing, which has been fun, it's actually really nice to experience this kind of story weekly since i came into TMA late and listened up to the s4 finale in like, a month or two. i've been enjoying the new characters and statements, and while i was worried i'd have trouble actively listening (my attention span/executive functioning can be really variable when it comes to podcasts), it's been surprisingly easy for me to actually listen to each new ep the day it drops publicly

all this to say im enjoying the show! but i've found myself feeling increasingly frustrated with a couple things i keep seeing when it comes to discussions of it

to me, it seems... there's been a pervasive reluctance to take TMP as what it is. and i do understand that. it'd be stupid to pretend TMP doesn't exist exclusively because of TMA and that show's success, that it's a successor that was pitched as being similar. it's a story being written by the same people (plus guests), in the same universe (roughly), going for about the same tone and maybe themes.

i just feel like it's a bit of a shame, though, that so many folks seem unwilling not to carry TMA with them when they're engaging with TMP

i don't know where or when it was said, but i swear there was a comment made by jonny and/or alex about how TMP will have some commonality with TMA in terms of world-building, but also, people who listened to TMA first may find themselves theorizing in the wrong direction because we're judging things based off what is no longer concrete, reliable information; things are going to work differently in the world of TMP, and since we have preconceived notions on what is relevant or how things work, that's going to influence how we engage with information presented in TMP if we let it. and that's not even considering the fact that they've been explicit in conveying the idea that TMP was written so you can experience it fully without having listened to any of TMA at all!

i'm very much someone who tries to engage with media on its own terms, largely taking things at face value until i'm given reason to suspect otherwise. that's something i'm trying my best to still do with TMP, even though obviously, i've also listened to TMA and am basing some of my thoughts and personal theories on what we know from that

but that's what i mean to say i guess, it's something you have to actively choose to do. and it feels like, just based on what i've been seeing in fandom spaces, that a lot of people are having a bit of an odd time with TMP because of a reluctance to do that?

i think the easiest way to explain what i mean is to point to a general acceptance, already on the level of fanon it seems, to interpret the computer voices as Our Jon and Martin (+ Jonah/Elias, maybe). now obviously we have the actual real world reason why their voices are present in TMP, because of course jonny and alex were going to come back as voices in the show in some way. and i 100% agree it's a perfectly logical conclusion to then interpret their inclusion as being related to Jon and Martin somehow. i'm personally very into the theory that it is in no way them - not in any way that matters - but specifically their voices that have been stolen (by the Web?) as a means to help spread fears in other realities. but that's really not how i've been seeing people play with the concept? it seems largely 1:1. and again, i totally understand where people are coming from with that - especially when you consider how it can be a super fun concept for horror and angst, or even just the fact that folks want an excuse to carry their favorite characters into this new show and still play around with them. i promise i don't mean to bring this up as a means of making anyone feel bad or like, chastised for interpreting things a certain way and playing in the space!

it's the biggest example of what i mean though, and was a huge point of frustration for me when we were first being presented with TMP. it's not just that i don't want the voices to be Jon and Martin proper (i am very into their Ambiguous End, i believe it's best to leave that as a space for fans to play in); in all honesty, i think it's kind of a shame and maybe even a bit boring (im sorry!) to be engaging with TMP this way

and it's not just stuff like that - i've been seeing a fair amount of people expressing frustration and feeling disappointed with how TMP is hitting, but i mean, i feel like that's inevitable when you're going into it expecting More TMA? i saw at least one person basically say "ive been waiting for it to make me feel the way TMA made me feel, and it hasn't yet", and i really just feel like that's setting yourself up to be dissatisfied! beyond the fact that we're only 5 episodes in and the story has barely gotten a chance to happen yet, a huge element of this new show is that it's being approached as a largely collaborative effort, it seems, with lots of guests coming in to help shape the story and more writing and plotting influence that isn't jonny

obviously it's fine to not be super into that! undoubtedly it's a question of taste. but you do have to acknowledge that that's the case and adjust your expectations accordingly, or else you're not going to have a great time

i really like TMA, i had a great time with it, but even if TMP is a sequel to its parent podcast, it's not the same thing - and personally, i don't want it to be! i do hope that's a sentiment that is able to be more widely felt by some fans as we gain more distance from TMA while TMP is airing. i just think more people would be able to enjoy it that way, and come up with more interesting theories and interpretations of things! but those are really just my own personal thoughts

[soracities]

oooh please tell us what writing rules are garbage I would love to hear more

it's not that they're garbage, which isn't what i said, just that they annoy me and even then what annoys me is not the "rules" themselves (because i do believe they can be useful depending on what you're writing) but when some of them are put out as the only way to write something as if storytelling is a one-size fits all approach, as if you can reduce the millenia-long history of literature into a fail-proof formula that will work for all writing across all cultures with no room for experimentation.

i think there are as many ways to tell a story as there are stories and how you tell something and the kind of language you use will vary depending on what language actually means to you as a writer. hemingway and faulkner both famously took digs at each other for their styles (even though i think there was a lot of admiration between them) but they are also two very different writers with two completely different approaches to language and how they use that language to say the things they want to say: neither is inherently better, or more right, than the other--their approaches were just right for them; if faulkner wanted to write using the "older, simpler, better" words hemingway loved, he would have. if james joyce wanted to depict dublin the way dickens depicted london, he would have done so. but they didn't.

someone once posted an excellent breakdown by jeff vandermeer of the different writing styles employed by different authors which i was silly enough not to save at the time, but in it he gives an overview of the structure of their sentences, and how complicated or "rich" the language is, without pitting one style against the other. and to be honest, i think writing advice that encourages you to examine and look at that relationship with language, and what it holds for you (and others) and why, is probably more helpful than blanket statements like "stay away from ambiguity" or "avoid long sentences" because neither of those actually mean anything--a sentence is a vessel but it's also a tool, like a hoghair brush or a palette knife; the value of its impact is not an essence that exists in and of itself, but entirely dependent on how you use it, otherwise all literature would just read the same way.

strict adherence to a particular form or structure within a language does not automatically make for better writing, especially not when so much literature actually consists of, and is built from, works and authors actively rebelling against those same traditional forms and structures (but which is also not to say that those forms and structures are inherently useless, either). you can say that long sentences "risk distraction" or are "ineffective" but then where does that leave someone like laszlo krasznahorkai, whose prose runs on like some kind of breathless, hypnotic incantantion for 20, 30 pages without a single full stop in sight? or a book like solar bones by mike mccormack which is made up of a single sentence going on for 200 pages? i'm not saying long sentences can't be boring or tedious, but in all honesty so can short sentences--so can any writing that follows the "rules" to the letter. if something is poorly written, the "rules" matter very little; if it's well written, they matter even less.

all that said, telling people to "avoid long sentences" is not inherently a bad thing because i think the core of it is wanting to ensure your writing remains clear, which is a fair point--but it's an issue, to me at least, when it turns into one of those dictums or pronouncements that actively narrows the potential range language can actually have. clarity is not always about length, or whether or not you cull all of your run-on lines--mihail sebastian drew a very nice distinction in one of his novels when he said "[is] there’s a single way of being clear? A notary can be clear, or a poet, but they don’t seem to me the same thing". a long sentence can be clear, but its clarity exists on different terms to a sentence that is five words long, because its relationship to its content is different. and at the end of the day, that relationship is really what it's about for me and it's distinct to each work and its author.

writers use the language and form they use that best allows them to say what they want to say. no one in their right mind is going to dismiss zadie smith for not writing like angela carter or angela carter for not writing like hemingway or hemingway for not writing like beckett or beckett for not writing like mallarmé. robert frost and sara teasdale were no more correct than the beatniks were. i love pared down, beautifully concise prose, but i also adore books that relish in language and all the various, multi-coloured layers of it, books that eschew (traditional) plot and books that question their own form and the reality of that form, and books that tell a story as straightforwardly as possible.

to be honest i think one of the most formative things i came across, years ago now, was this piece by gary provost, which really sums up the whole notion of "writing rules" for me:

this is not about do's or dont's. it even breaks the first writing rule i learnt in school ("never begin a sentence with 'And'"). but what it does is center an intimate understanding of language, where it can go and how it can get there, and what you want that to do. that's where it's at for me!

[just-a-girl-who-wrytes]

Omg I just accidently found your blog and I'm so freaking happy, cause there are not enough writer who writes for Deacon 😭 unfortunately I'm super obsessed with him, with an unhealthy amount of fic ideas in my brain xD so I give it a try and send you one of those, hopefully jot annoying you with this (or with my shitty English, it's not my first language, so I'm sorry).

Well buckle up for my request:

Reader is a new Swat member and instantly everybody loves her, with her bubbly friendly self. She's bonding great with her teammates and especially her and Deacon grow super close (they develop feelings for each other but don't want to tell the each other afraid to ruin their friendship, so their feelings stay hidden). When one day a case goes sideways and it leaves her injured (maybe a concussion or something like that) Deacon blames himself for her injury and the next days he distances himself from her, cause he thinks that it is unhealthy for him to have such deep feelings for her and him constantly worrying for her wellbeing. She notices his change of behavior and she's super sad. He starts to being unfriendly to her and being a little bit of an ass?! Even alerting the other members with his behavior. The whole situation is taking a toll on her and she is starting to effecting not only her poor heart but also her health. (so maybe she falls sick, but keep it from her teammates especially Deacon, cause she thinks that after her injury during a case he thinks of her as not capable or something like that). That is until one day she doesn't show up to work which very uncommon for her, cause she's always on time and the first one at the station. They're all worrried and Hondo tells Deacon that he has to drive to her apartment. Well he tries to refuse and send Stress but Hondo insists, so Deacon drives to her apartment. He finds her suffering from a very high fever..... So maybe with a happy ending like Deacon regrets his shitty behavior, she instantly cries when she recognizes him in her feverish state, asking him why he hates her suddenly, which is now breaking his heart. He cares for her and nurses her back to health, or at first tries to bring her fever down. Later he confesses why he was an asshole.

Soooorry it's so long. There's so pressure for you to write this. Maybe you just want to use some ideas? Well I would be so happy.

Please take care lovely

Here you go, hope you enjoy!

“Nice!” Luca exclaimed as the team watched you send rounds down range from your firearm.

With the increase in officer related shootings, LAPD had decided to provide each team a SWAT medic and you were the newest member of 20 squad. 

“Who knew girls can shoot?” You heard Deacon asked. You turned to playfully scowl at him and noticed him wink at you. 

“Better watch it, Kay, or I’ll show you just how good I really am.” 

You had been a part of the team for just over two months and they were the best guys you had ever worked with in your career. You truly became a part of their family – you had their backs and they had yours. There was one that was different though. 

David Kay. 

You had noticed him watching you on more than one occasion, stealing winks from you, sharing small, flirtatious smiles. You weren’t sure if your attraction to him was mutual or not, but if you had to guess, you would say yes. However, you didn’t want to complicate anything by dating one of your teammates and you didn’t want to ruin the friendship you had developed with Deacon. You assumed Deacon adopted the same mindset because he never brought it up either. 

However, that didn’t mean your flirting with each other fell on blind eyes. 

The entire team noticed it and often gave you both shit over it. 

You both were in the middle of denying another teasing round of friends with benefits accusations from your teammates when you were dispatched to a school shooting. 

The mood immediately sobered up as all of you put on your gear and grabbed your bags and firearms. The ride to the school in Black Betty was quiet minus updates from Hondo. 

“Stay liquid, guys,” He told the team as you pulled up on scene. 

There were multiple reports of injured children inside of the school. 

This call was all yours. 

It was going to be your job to go inside and assess each injured child to see how critically injured they were. It was your team’s job to protect you while you did that. You were going in without any knowledge of where the shooter was, but you knew if you had children, you would want someone to go in and save your baby. You swallowed your fear and prepared to do your job. 

You got out of the armored truck and took your spot in the middle of your team. You slowed your breathing down to get your heart rate under control and keep your emotions in check. 

Deacon made sure that he stayed close to you as you entered the school. He knew his teammates would have your back too, but he felt… differently about you. He cared about you a lot. He had quickly fallen for your smile and your personality. You didn’t let the team’s banter intimidate you one bit from the start. You were quick and witty with your playfulness with them. You were smart as hell when it came to medicine and you had proven to be a solid member of the SWAT team in training exercises and on calls you had run together. He wanted so badly to ask you out to dinner, but he wasn’t willing to change the dynamic of the team by adding a relationship to the mix. However, that didn’t mean he couldn’t be protective over you – whether you noticed it or not. 

That was why Deacon had taken it so personally when you were knelt down, applying a tourniquet to a fourth-grade student’s leg and got shot by the hidden gunman. His team covered him while he immediately turned to you to make sure you were okay. The round had struck your vest, but you knew it had broken ribs. The pain you felt in your side was unmistakable. Regardless, you threw your body over the child’s to protect her from the gunfire that ensued. Deacon and Luca dragged you both behind a desk behind a wall in a classroom. 

“Are you okay?” Deacon asked without taking his aim from the door way. 

“We’ve got to get her out of here.” You ignored his question as you continued to try and stop the little girl’s bleeding. 

Your voice was forced and you were breathy. 

“I asked if you were okay,” Deacon said angrily. 

“I’m fine.” You retorted. 

You soon heard Tan’s voice over the radio that the shooter had been neutralized. You didn’t know if there was more than one shooter, but didn’t see any signs of one so far. When you got the clear from Hondo, you radioed for another team to come in and get the girl out and get her to a hospital. Once she was safely removed, you resumed your formation in the middle of the team to continue to clear the school building. Deacon could tell you were injured because you didn’t shoulder your firearm correctly, but he didn’t see any blood so he let it go. He was pissed off at you for not stopping and going to get help yourself, but he was even more pissed off at himself for not seeing the gunman before he shot at you. 

It took two hours to clear the rest of the school and stabilize the remaining children. By the time you were done, you were visibly diaphoretic and short of breath. You could hardly manage three words without stopping to catch your breath. 

“20-David to command,” Deacon radioed, “We need an EMS unit to our location, we have a team member who needs to be checked out.” 

You were in pain, you couldn’t breathe, and you were pissed off that Deacon asked for EMS without consulting you first. 

“Why did you do that?!” You managed to asked through clenched teeth. “These children need those paramedics.” You took a few shallow breaths, “Not me! Cancel. Them.” 

If looks could kill, your sergeant would be the one who needed a medic unit, not you.

“Officer,” Deacon said sternly, “You look like hell and you cannot breathe.”

You started to open your mouth to cut him off, but he started speaking loudly again.

“Now, I suggest you shut up and listen to your sergeant. I am not the one who takes orders from you.” 

His harsh words hit you harder than the bullet hit your ballistic vest and left you just as speechless. David had never been so disrespectful to you. If the paramedics hadn’t arrived to assess you, you would have turned in your badge right there. You knew the rest of the team had noticed as well because they were all silent which pissed you off even more. Where was your support?

The paramedics tried helping you onto the stretcher, but you refused it. Despite not being able to speak for being short of breath. You held onto the stretcher for support and walked to the ambulance. By the time you finally made it outside to the ambulance, you were physically unable to get into the ambulance because you were hurting so bad and so short of breath. The EMS providers finally convinced you to get onto the stretcher and they were able to load you into the truck. 

When you arrived to the ER, you were taken to a trauma room due to the fact that you had technically been shot. Your chest x-ray revealed a collapsed lung due to the broken ribs. 

The rest of the team finished debriefing before being cleared to leave for the day. Hondo met Deacon in the quiet locker rooms since most of everyone else had already left. 

“Deac…” Hondo paused, knowing he needed to tread carefully, “What was up back at the school? I have never heard you speak to anyone like that – especially one of our teammates.” 

Deacon slammed his locker shut. 

“Hondo, now ain’t the time, brother.”

The lieutenant raised his hands in surrender. “Okay, I won’t press, but I do ask that you consider an apology. It was unwarranted today. We all performed immaculately given the circumstances.”

“No, Hondo. No. We did not all perform immaculately.” His tone was biting. 

Deacon walked passed Hondo and left the locker rooms. He left the station and threw his duffel bag in the backseat of his truck. He climbed in, started it, and drove to a nearby lake that off the road and would likely be deserted after dark on a week night. He parked in the dark and slammed his fists against the steering wheel in frustration. 

Tears filled his eyes as he mentally kicked himself in the ass for missing the shooter that injured you today. He didn’t fight the tears as they spilled down his cheeks. What had gotten into him? Why were you different? Why was he so upset? Why did you getting injured bother him so badly? You were okay and you were expected to make a full recovery according to Hicks. Where along the line had he developed feelings and why was he so afraid of talking to you about them?

You spent 6 days in the hospital, 4 of those with a chest tube before being discharged home. During your entire hospital stay, Deacon had not been by to see you once despite daily visits from the rest of your teammates. It made you mad, but most of all, it hurt your feelings. You really liked you sergeant – or you thought that you did. His actions since you had been injured spoke louder than any words that could have been said. 

Luca and Chris were there to take you home and help you get settled. They carried your bags in and Chris helped you unpack your things while Luca cooked supper for the three of you. Chris helped you remove your bra so you could put on a loose, comfy t-shirt. Being the only females on the squad left you two comfortable around each other. 

“That is one hell of a bruise, babe.” She said as she looked at your black and purple side. 

You had to agree – the entire left side of your torso was bruised. It looked awful. Thankfully, the doctors had been able to help manage your pain with narcotics. 

“I’m glad it finally looks worse than it feels… Which is saying a lot because it still hurts like hell.” 

You slipped on a pair of sleep shorts and made your way back into your kitchen with Chris. 

You took a pain pill and joined your teammates in your living room to eat the spaghetti that Luca made. 

“Thank you so much for taking care of me guys,” You said several hours later as you walked Luca and Chris to your door. 

“That’s what we’re here for, love,” Luca said, pulling you into a gentle hug. 

You kissed his cheek, “Supper was delicious, Dom. Thank you times a million.” 

He returned the kiss to your cheek and Chris pulled you in for a hug. 

“Call us if you need anything?” 

You smiled at her after the hug, “You know I will.” 

You settled onto your couch with a glass of wine. You knew the alcohol and narcotic wasn’t the smartest elixir, however, you needed to mask more than your physical pain. 

You couldn’t get Deacon off your mind and your heart had yet to stop hurting. Your emotional pain screamed much louder than your physical pain. 

“Dammit!” You heard through clouded consciousness. “What the fuck?” 

You felt yourself being picked up and carried to your bed. You recognized a familiar cologne but quickly disregarded the scent and winced at the pain in your ribs before drifting back off to sleep. 

You woke up the next morning nearly in tears again as you entered a coughing spell. You managed to get out of bed and make your way to the kitchen where your pain pills were, but you were scared shitless by a man sitting at your kitchen table. As soon as your heart began racing with fear, the fear subsided, realizing that it was Deacon sitting inside of your home. 

“Jesus Christ! What the fuck, David?” You held your chest with one hand and braced your broken ribs with the other. 

He didn’t answer you. 

You ignored his silence and took your morning pain medication. 

“Ya know… I said the same thing last night when I came over and found you unconscious on your couch. So, I can also say, what the fuck? What were you thinking?” Deacon’s voice grew steadily louder as he stood up and turned to you. “Pain pills and alcohol?”

You were angry. “Something to make this shit stop hurting,” You spat as you snatched up the side of your shirt to reveal your black and blue torso. 

You could tell the extent of your injuries caught Deacon off guard. His facial expression softened and he didn’t respond. 

You let go of your shirt, letting it fall back down to your waist and continued fixing yourself a glass of water to take your pain pill with. You took your medicine and continued to ignore your sergeant as you turned your back to him to get the milk out of your refrigerator to fix yourself a bowl of cereal. His hand stopped yours mid-air reaching for your cabinet. He gently held your wrist with one hand and you felt the edge of your shirt being lifted again. He let go of your hand, staring at the bruising that covered you. You could sense his demeanor soften. 

There was a long silence as he took in your injuries. 

“I’m so sorry…” He whispered. 

The tone in his voice felt like a hug to your soul. 

“Deacon-” You turned around to face him. 

“No, listen to me,” he interrupted you. “This…” He grazed his fingertip down your side, “is all my fault.”

The confusion was written all over your face. 

“I should have seen that bastard before he ever had a chance at you.” 

You began shaking your head but you weren’t quite sure what to say. 

“You’ve been an asshole to me ever since it happened, David, what the hell has changed now?” You were beginning to grow angry again. 

“Look, I am so, so sorry.” His voice was gentle. “I should have stopped that guy before he shot you. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like I did. I should have visited you in the hospital. You are a teammate and I failed you, but I really should have told you from the get-go that I have developed feelings for you.” He didn’t take a breath the entire time he spoke so you struggled to follow him, but his last sentence hit you like a ton of bricks. 

“Excuse me?” 

“Ever since you have been on the team with us, you have become more than just a teammate to me. Truthfully, I have liked you from the day that I met you and my attraction to you has only grown every single day. I like you so much more than just as a teammate. I would dare say that I am falling in love with you.” He slowly reached up to cradle your face with his hand, hesitant, wondering if you would allow him to touch you. 

You did. 

“I am so, so sorry that I have treated you so poorly this week – so wrong. It had nothing to do with you and everything to do with the fact that I hate myself for not being able to protect you like I should have. I’ve been so afraid to let you know how I feel about you. I’m sorry I was more afraid of affecting the team than I was giving you the honesty that you deserve. Please, please forgive me.” 

He looked into your eyes as he nervously chewed on his bottom lip. 

“Deacon…” You said quietly, leaning into his hand caressing your jaw. 

He took a deep breath and continued, “If you don’t feel the same way, I understand, but I came over here last night to apologize and tell you all of this. When I found you passed out on the couch, barely responsive, it frustrated me. So, I stayed here last night to make sure you were okay. Please don’t be mad.” 

Silence fell between you while you considered how to respond. Given the emotions that you had worked through over the past week, going from feelings for your partner, to physical and emotional hurt, to anger towards David for not visiting, texting or calling, resentment towards yourself for having feelings towards David despite how cruel he had been to you with his absence while you had been hospitalized, you struggled to find any words.

Deacon watched you suffer through a week’s worth of feelings as he watched your eyes. You took a deep breath. 

He decided that you were taken too long to respond and if he didn’t act now, he never would. 

He leaned down and softly pressed his lips on yours. 

You instinctively closed your eyes and allowed David to kiss you. When you didn’t pull away, he parted his lips just enough to run his tongue tenderly along your bottom lip. You opened your lips, allowing him to kiss you deeper. You began to return the kiss when David went to place his hands on your waist, forgetting about your injuries. You stopped kissing him and winced. 

“God, I’m so sorry,” he said.

“It’s okay.” You whispered, your voice shaky. 

Deacon noticed the tears that trickled down your cheeks. 

He wiped them away with his thumbs and began apologizing to you again. 

You interrupted him with another kiss. You reached up and intertwined your fingers behind his head, softly rubbing his neck with your fingertips. He moaned quietly into the kiss. He grabbed your arm and squeezed it, needing to touch you, but being mindful of your injuries. You enjoyed the feeling of his tall, muscular body, towering over yours. You felt protected. 

“Deacon?” 

He pressed his forehead to yours, brushing a stand of hair behind your ear, “Mmhmm?”

“I love you.” 

"I love you too."

[helloalycia]

𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 𝐈 𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐊 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐃 𝐓𝐎 [𝐎𝐍𝐄] — 𝐋𝐔𝐂𝐘 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐘 𝐁𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐃

summary: after you hear about Lucy Gray's breakup, you wonder if you'll finally have a chance with her. Of course, your father, the head peacekeeper, can never know you like the 'troublemaker' from the Covey.

warning/s: none i don't think?

author's note: okay so after a million years i finally got this one written, an idea that came to me like a week ago and took forever to write because life lol. I hope you all like it anyway, it’s a three parter and was fun to write :)

something to note - Y/BF/N = your best friend's name and Y/D/N = your dad's name

two / three / masterlist / wattpad

"...and I told him that he shouldn't say stuff he doesn't mean, especially when it's just plain old rude, but of course he didn't care..."

I hummed, nodding along as my best friend, Y/BF/N, rambled about an encounter she'd had with one of her neighbours, but I was also glancing around the hallway casually. It was the end of the school day and I was waiting for Y/BF/N to collect her books from her locker so we could go, but she easily got distracted.

Apparently so did I though, as my eyes fell upon Lucy Gray Baird, a talented musician and outsider in my grade, part of a group called the Covey that everyone either tended to avoid or fell in love with for their musical charm. I always found her fascinating, beautiful, as many others did, but she had a boyfriend which pretty much meant there was no chance there. Still, it didn't hurt to admire her.

She was talking to another member of the Covey, Tam Amber, when she accidentally walked into none other than the mayor's daughter, Mayfair Lipp. It wouldn't have mattered so much if there wasn't a clear tension between both girls.

"If only you could open your eyes like you open your damn mouth," Mayfair snapped at her, making passers-by glance their way, listening in.

"Was an accident," was all Lucy Gray said, and she didn't seem very apologetic.

Mayfair scoffed. "'Course it was. A lot of things with you seem to be, don't they?"

Lucy Gray rolled her eyes as Tam Amber tugged her away, the two girls going their separate ways. Y/BF/N, who had stopped talking to observe the argument with everyone else, tried to stifle her laughter.

"Wow, their hatred for each other does not seem to be going away, does it?" she commented to me.

"Do you know why they don't like each other?" I asked, curious.

Y/BF/N shrugged, closing her locker. "Mayfair's jealous, I think. Dunno why, since she's literally the mayor's daughter and the Covey are just a bunch of weirdos singing for their supper."

"They aren't weird," I corrected her as we walked outside. "They're talented. A little different, is all."

"Same thing," Y/BF/N mumbled. "Don't go saying that to your dad. You know how he feels about them."

I tried not to laugh. "He feels like that about anything fun."

Y/BF/N cracked a smile, before chuckling. "Very true."

My father was the head peacekeeper of our district, a very strict man who was a little too overprotective for my liking. Don't get me wrong, I was grateful for the hard work he put in which meant I could live in the nice part of town and never struggle to have a meal on the table. That was something not everyone in District 12 could count on. But it also meant he hated anything that wasn't to his standard.

He had high hopes for me, hoping I'd land a rare but possible job in the Justice Building when I finished school. It wasn't too far fetched considering I was a straight A student. But he also thought I was a goody two shoes who followed the rules – oh, how that couldn't have been far from the truth. If he ever found out how I snuck out at night to visit the Hob and flirt with most of his unit, I was certain he'd have a heart attack.

Being the head peacekeeper's daughter meant that it was out of my hands when he had to attend something important and I, too, had to be present. For example, today was Mayfair's birthday and the mayor had thrown a formal affair in her honour, of which my family had been invited to.

I tolerated Mayfair, but despite our similar stance in society, we didn't share anything else in common. She was too snarky and easily irritated and always killed the mood, so I remained polite with her and that was it. Her party was as boring as she was, full of the mayor's friends, the odd Capitol resident from her dad's circle, and their kids whom I wasn't sure Mayfair even spoke to. If she had any real friends, they weren't here.

Her home was pretty big, for a District 12 house anyway, which made sense since the mayor was the richest in the district, though poor by any other Panem standard. I kept to myself during her celebrations, occasionally chatting with my mum and her friends or picking at the snacks table. That was until a special performance, dedicated solely to Mayfair from her father himself, was announced. An amused grin fell on my lips when I saw who it was.

The Covey.

"Ladies an' gentlemen, how are we feelin' this afternoon?!" Lucy Gray said into her mic at the front of the space cleared in the huge dining room.

Everybody began to clap as I saw the mayor tugging his daughter to the left of the makeshift stage. To say she was angry was an understatement. But if Lucy Gray had any qualms with the arrangement, she didn't let it show.

"This one's for the birthday girl," Lucy Gray continued, smiling widely at the glaring girl in question. "Happy birthday, dear Mayfair."

After the count of three, the Covey were plucking their strings, banging their drums and joining together in a melodious rendition of 'Happy Birthday', and I tried very hard not to laugh as Mayfair was forced to endure it all. To be fair, the Covey were great, and when they performed several songs after that, half the party were cheering them on, either drunk or genuinely amazed by their talent.

Once they'd finished performing for a moment and took a break, Mayfair stormed off with her father in tow, who was attempting not to draw attention to the mishap with his party guests. Again, I couldn't help but stifle my laughter at the turn of events.

Lucy Gray caught my eyes again though, as she was approaching the snacks table I was sat at the edge of, in search of something.

"You guys performed great out there," I said to her when she was close enough, and she glanced up at me, before recognition flashed across her face and she began to smile.

"Why thank you."

"Bet you loved the gig," I said lightheartedly, and it took her a moment to realise what I was implying when she began to laugh.

"It wasn't ideal," she said in a low yet amused voice, "but a job's a job. And technically Mayfair's daddy hired us, not her."

I chuckled to myself. "Hey, it was pretty funny to witness. I'm not complaining."

She shot me a disapproving look as she tossed a grape into her mouth, but a playful smile was breaking out on her lips.

"I didn't know you and Mayfair were so close," she said with intrigue, flipping the conversation to me.

"We're not," I corrected. "Kind of a package deal when my dad's invited to these things. But your performance certainly made this whole thing worth it."

She began to smile, cheeks turning pink slightly. "You've seen our performances enough times now. You ain't sick of me yet?"

I gasped sarcastically. "Lucy Gray, I could never be sick of you. What nonsense are you talkin' about?"

Her smile widened with amusement, before her eyes flickered behind me. "Your daddy's coming. I should go. Wouldn't want him to find out about your sneakin' out and blame it on me."

"As far as he knows, you're a stranger," I played along with a teasing wink, before straightening up and turning around to face my dad.

I heard Lucy Gray walking away behind me just in time for my dad to smile down at me.

"Y/N, how are you enjoying the party?" he asked.

I smiled innocently. "It's great, dad, thanks for bringing me."

He nodded. "Good, I'm glad."

I glanced over my shoulder as he began to talk about what the mayor was saying to him earlier, searching for the Covey girl. Then I spotted her, talking to her family across the room and also shooting me a glance, her cheeky smile on her lips, mirroring mine.

A little flirting didn't hurt anybody, right?

With my father's job came many responsibilities that meant he had a lot of late nights at their base camp, including the weekend when I sneaked out the house to meet Y/BF/N at the Hob and have some fun. It was difficult at first, making sure I timed it right so my mum would be asleep when I left and also generally sneaking downstairs and out the back door. But the more I did it, the easier it became, and soon enough it was second nature.

By the time I reached the Hob tonight, everything was in full swing. The Covey were performing as usual and everybody was up and dancing. I found Y/BF/N at a table, flirting with some boys from our grade. It didn't take long for me to join them, and between the two of us, we landed free drinks just because we played our cards right.

It was so freeing at the Hob, not having to worry about my dad breathing down my neck or about being such a goody two shoes in his eyes. No, here I could do whatever I wanted. The night was always young and nobody could stop me from having fun.

I found myself dancing around with a peacekeeper, Terrence, who had finished his shift for the day and always happened to be around when I did. He'd been flirting for a while and it was easy to play along, have a little fun.

"It's too bad I can't be lookin' for a wife," he said with a boyish grin as he spun me around. "You'd be my first choice."

I tried not to laugh as I wrapped my arms around his neck. "Yeah, that's too bad for you."

"Your dad would kill me if he knew what I was doing," he said, leaning in close for a kiss.

But I tilted his head and pressed one to his cheek instead, before saying in his ear, "Good thing he won't ever find out, right?"

He snorted. "Right."

I smiled contently, before letting him spin me around some more. It was always so easy to do what I wanted here without the fear of it getting back to my father because either everyone was scared of him and what power he held, or they knew it was my word against theirs and my father would never believe them. Besides, I was doing no harm. Some people just wanted a dance and a little flirting, which was exactly what I gave them. What was the big deal?

After finishing my dance with Terrence, I joined Y/BF/N's side again, grabbing her hands and pulling her onto the dancefloor for one final dance for the evening. She laughed, letting me, and we began to chat as we swung about gently.

"How was your dance with Terrence?" she asked with amusement. "You still leadin' the poor boy on?"

"It's not leading him on if he knows it's just a dance," I reminded her. "Besides, it can never happen. He's in my dad's unit. And I don't even like him like that."

"You just flirt with him for fun," she said sarcastically, but I grinned anyway.

"Duh."

Laughing again, she let me spin her around, and then my eyes found sight of Lucy Gray beside the stage. She was talking to her boyfriend, Billy Taupe, the two of them looking awfully cosy with one another. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes, knowing it was just an irrational jealousy, nothing more. I'd never even hinted that I'd liked her, and she'd been taken for a while now, but it was easy to wonder what if.

"You're staring," Y/BF/N noticed, before following my gaze. "Ooh, Y/N, you've gotta let that one go. She's trouble, I heard."

"I didn't even say anything," I defended myself.

"You don't need to," she said knowingly. "Your face says it all. And I'm warning you now. It's not worth it."

I rolled my eyes lightheartedly. "Yeah, yeah, just keep dancing, idiot."

She stifled a chuckle and we got back to it, but not without me stealing one last lingering glance at Lucy Gray.

Of course, after that evening, news of her and Billy Taupe travelled all around school. Rumour had it that he'd cheated on her with Mayfair and, as a result, they'd broken up. Of course it was horrible to hear, but admittedly, the first thing I wondered was did I finally have a chance?

Almost two weeks after hearing the news of Lucy Gray's breakup, I was at the Hob again. I'd been watching the Covey perform all evening, though this time without Billy Taupe who was permanently out of the band it seemed. I'd been waiting for Lucy Gray to be free so I could attempt to make a move.

And after what felt like forever, she finally took to the bar to have some water, and I sucked up a breath before approaching her with a skip in my step.

"Lucy Gray," I started with a smile, earning her attention. "You okay?"

She took a sip before nodding at me. "Yeah, just havin' a break."

"Just a break from singing, right?" I asked, making her quirk a brow. I continued, "Because I'd love to ask you to dance."

A smile grew on her lips, matching the sparkle in her eyes. "I've seen you around, Y/L/N. You probably ask everyone that, don't you?"

I resisted the urge to laugh. "Without sounding big headed, they ask me. So, no, not everyone. Just you. I'd like to dance with you, if you'll have me."

She pursed her lips, eyes flickering between mine considerately and in a way that purposely left me waiting, hoping she'd say yes. Finally, she sighed lightheartedly. "Well, I suppose if you'd like it, who am I to decline?"

My smile widened as I put out my hand and she gladly accepted. The rest of the Covey were playing a song slow enough to have us swaying to the melody, joining the other dancers on the floor.

"You're pretty good at this," Lucy Gray mumbled with amusement, hands wrapped around my shoulders and her head looking over it so I couldn't see her expression.

"Can't be stepping on your toes now, can I?" I said quietly, as to not interrupt the momentary peace that had washed over the Hob. "What sort of impression would that make?"

She snickered. "And why would you be tryin' to make any impression, darlin'? It's just a dance, ain't it?"

A smile crept on my lips. "That it is. But you never know."

She pulled back for a moment, honey-coloured eyes glancing between mine as if trying to decipher my words. I thought I was pretty straightforward, but she clearly didn't agree. Finally, her smile mirrored mine and she leaned her head on my shoulder as we swayed to the song.

It was only a few minutes long, of which, despite my apparent calmness, I was a little nervous to be dancing with such a beautiful girl. I hoped she couldn't feel my heart racing between us. It certainly didn't help when she began to hum lowly, clearly knowing the words to Maude Ivory's ballad, and the deep reverberation of her humming echoed in my ear.

When the song came to an end, everybody parted and applauded the band for their song. Meanwhile, Lucy Gray pulled apart, hands moving from my shoulders and to my hands, squeezing them gently.

"Thanks for the dance," I said to her with a suppressed smile.

"Thanks for askin'," she replied.

My smile was permanently fixed on my face as I watched her walk away, back to the stage for her next number. It wasn't until Y/BF/N appeared out of nowhere, patting me on the back, that I was pulled from my Lucy Gray-induced stupor.

"Someone's crushing," she teased, and I simply ignored her as I glanced back at the brunette onstage.

I was lucky she was giving me a chance at all.

After that initial dance, it became almost tradition to dance with her every time I could, and she always accepted, for some reason giving me the time of day. Visiting the Hob had a new, exciting meaning now, and not just to have some fun fooling around.

Getting to know her more, hearing her talk about her love of performing or something that happened to her that day, meant we were growing closer. Not quite friends, but not anything less either. We'd see each other around school and greet each other, or she'd walk past me in the markets and flash me a smile. Y/BF/N thought I was insane to like her, but I couldn't help it.

A few weeks after that initial dance, she was rambling about some frustrating things before her show, including her shoes not tying quite right, or the step on the stage being a little dodgy and making everyone trip up. One of her complaints was about her red lipstick, which had officially ran out and was her favourite one to wear for performing. Lipstick and makeup in general were rare finds, and she must have searched around a lot to get it, but now she couldn't replace it, not for a while anyway, and it was upsetting her more than she let on.

I couldn't help it, of course. I had to rectify the issue. So, I found a way to trade some meaningless things at the markets in exchange for a red lipstick, one that looked fresh from the Capitol and that I knew Lucy Gray would love. Later that evening, after sneaking out of my house, I headed straight for the garage behind the Hob that the Covey had claimed, where they prepared for their shows.

When I entered, everybody was doing different things, from tuning their instruments to fixing their hair.

"Lucy Gray, Y/N's here!" someone shouted in a teasing voice, and I didn't get chance to see who as Lucy Gray suddenly appeared, stealing my attention.

"Hey, darlin', what're you doing here?" she asked with a bright smile, looking as beautiful as ever.

"Just wanted to wish you luck," I told her, returning her smile. "And of course, bring you a little something."

Her dark brows knitted together above confused eyes, and I took the lipstick from my jacket pocket before holding it out to her.

"You were saying how you felt weird performing without it," I explained as she curiously took it to inspect it, "so I got you another one. Can't have the iconic Lucy Gray without her iconic red lipstick, can we?"

An amazed smile grew on her lips as she looked at the colour, and I couldn't stop looking at her.

"Y/N, this... how did you get this?" she asked with a laugh, meeting my gaze.

I shrugged, and she rolled her eyes before hugging me.

"Thank you so much," she said gratefully, pulling back to grin at me. "I... I don't know what to say."

"You don't need to say anything, just wear it," I said.

She laughed again before going up to the mirror hung on the wall, applying the lipstick as she always did before  every show. And when she turned around, I knew I'd made the right choice. As always, she stole my breath away.

"You look beautiful," I told her truthfully. "But you always do."

The pink tingeing her cheeks was contrasted to the deep red of her lips, but she remained confident as she stepped towards me knowingly.

"There's only one way to truly test it," she said, and I didn't get chance to ask what she meant before she pressed a slow but firm kiss on my cheek.

I was dumbstruck, not expecting that at all, and she pulled back with a satisfied smile. Her hand ghosted my cheek, thumb rubbing gently on the inevitable lipstick stain on my face.

"I'll see you out there," she said, dropping her hand but not her smile. "Thanks again, Y/N."

Still reeling at the sensation of her lips on my cheek, I couldn't find the words to reply. She laughed before returning to the Covey, and somehow I found myself walking to the Hob to sit with Y/BF/N. As soon as she spotted the lipstick on my cheek, the laughing and teasing began, but it didn't mean much when Lucy Gray walked out onstage, her matching red-painted lips curved into a grin.

It was easy to fall quicker and harder for Lucy Gray after that, so much in fact that the only thing I wanted to do was kiss her for real.

No matter how much time we spent together, the shameless flirting and banter wasn't enough. I didn't want to be platonic, I wanted more, and I was sure she might have wanted it too.

One evening at the Hob, we were both sat at the bar chatting. Well, she was chatting and I was very much distracted by the sharp curve of her jaw and the curly ringlets of hair that kept spilling into her eyes and the way her mouth moved with each word she spoke and–

"You're not listenin', are you?" she asked lightheartedly, humoured smirk on her lips, matching the quirk of her brow.

That seemed to be the final straw for me, and I couldn't help but lean in, kissing her. Only as I did it did I realise the insanity of my actions, the carelessness, and I pulled away just as quickly. Before I could even scold myself for acting so recklessly, endless apologies on the tip of my tongue, something caught my eye from behind her.

My eyes widened when I recognised the person who had just walked into the Hob. It was my father, the head peacekeeper who hated coming in here because he believed it was a distraction and a bad influence. He was here, and he'd just walked in with some of his peacekeeper friends.

And I was sat in here, a little too close to a girl he also deemed a bad influence. Oh, shit.

"My dad," was all I could get out, before I forgot everything that had happened with Lucy Gray and immediately threw myself over the bar, hiding behind it.

"What are you doin'?!" Lucy Gray leaned over, looking down at me with a puzzled expression.

I couldn't have hunkered down anymore if I tried. "Dad. Doorway. Now!" I whisper-shouted, as if he'd suddenly hear me from all the way across the room.

She must have looked and recognised him as her shadow disappeared and she was no longer trying to talk to me. As I formulated a plan to escape, hoping the full house and loud music would be the perfect distraction, I heard a familiar voice nearing.

"Commander Y/L/N!" Lucy Gray exclaimed loudly, and my heart sank at the possibility of getting caught. "Hi!"

He hesitated, before responding, quite literally just above me. "Lucy Gray, right? The Covey. You performed at Mayfair's birthday a couple of months ago."

I could practically picture the grin on her face as she answered enthusiastically, "The one an' only!"

Sounding a little more laid back than usual, he said, "It was an excellent performance."

"Why, thank you, sir," she replied kindly.

It was quiet between them for a moment, as he ordered a drink with the bartender who thankfully seemed to understand why I was hiding right next to his feet, but he mustn't have left afterwards, as Lucy Gray spoke up.

"Oh, they'll bring your drinks to your table, sir."

"It's fine, I'll wait," he said dismissively, and Lucy Gray merely hummed in response, but I didn't hear her leave.

My heart was racing as I didn't dare move a muscle. My father was stood right next to me, only a bar between us, and I was sure he'd kill me if he knew I was here. Why the hell was he even here?! This was so unlike him!

But no, I couldn't think about that right now. I could only focus on leaving before he discovered my presence.

"So, are you performing here?" my dad asked Lucy Gray in an awkward attempt at filling the silence. He was never good at small talk.

"Uh-huh," she responded just as awkwardly, and I appreciated that, despite my previous mistake with her, she was still willing to keep my secret.

"Nice," was all he said. "I look forward to it. The officers say you're really good."

She didn't reply, must have smiled or nodded or something, because the conversation ended and I was back to hearing the blood rushing in my ears.

After what felt like forever, I heard the bartender serve my dad his drink, and then the latter wished Lucy Gray a good evening before leaving. I didn't dare move, not until I was certain, but Lucy Gray banged the top of the bar to get my attention.

"He's on the other side talking to some officers," she assured me.

"I need to leave out the back," I said, not showing my head just yet. "He'll kill me."

"Okay, just wait," she instructed, and I did just that until I realised she had rounded the bar and was holding her hand out to me. "Come on."

Accepting her hand, I let her keep a look out before she dragged me through the back and out the door, away from my father's prying eyes.

A sigh of relief escaped me as I was in the clear, and Lucy Gray was laughing at my expense.

"That was close," she said between laughter, glancing back as the door closed behind us.

Straightening up, I nodded in agreement. "It was. Thanks for the assist."

She settled on an amused smile before her eyes met mine and her expression softened. "You know, you were in the middle of somethin' back there."

And just like that, the mortifying realisation of kissing her returned to memory, and I was instantly about to apologise.

"Yeah, I–"

She cut me off with a kiss, just as abrupt as mine, but unlike me, she didn't pull away, and I was left to melt into her lips, savouring the warmth of her skin pressed to mine. Her hand cupped my cheek, fingertips pressing down gently, and I sighed into her lips as she began to pull away for air.

"That was... unexpected," I muttered, lips still tingling.

She tried not to laugh. "As unexpected as you kissin' me before?"

I exhaled, slightly embarassed, and she licked her lips before taking my hand and squeezing it gently.

"You should probably head home before your daddy finds you out here," she said, a hint of humour in her voice.

"Home, right," I agreed, before meeting her eyes. "I'll see you at school tomorrow?"

She grinned. "See you then."

I smiled softly before kissing her hand and leaving. It was safe to say I couldn't sleep the rest of the night, my only thoughts of the curly-haired Covey girl who'd stolen my heart.

[hrtbreakanniversary]

photograph | suguru geto

warnings: no use of honorifics, reader is described as a female but it can be read as gender neutral, y/n simping very hard for geto, him simping just as hard

word count: 2k

Y/N resisted the urge to grab the brown-haired bobbed girl by the hair as she playfully rolled her eyes at the suffering she was putting her best friend through.

Shoko asked her if she wanted to go to the cherry blossom festival. Originally she thought it was only going to be just them two. A little bestie date away from tiresome missions and Yaga's constant lecturing. She was especially excited to post on Facebook about their day with cute photos. No one mentioned that that Satoru Gojo was tagging along as well. And wherever Gojo was, Suguru Geto went along too.

"You'll be fine. They're super nice and I've told them a lot about you," Shoko nudged her on the side," Plus we can have Gojo buy us crepes." before interlocking their fingers and joining the two tall males that stood only a few feet away from them.

It wasn't that Y/N hated them. No, it was quite the opposite. She honestly was quite star stuck by them.

Meeting Shoko was by chance because of a bad injury she had from one of her missions. She underestimated the grade of the curse. Almost risking her life and becoming immobilized that Nanami had to take over and finish up the mission on his own. She apologized every day after when he visited her in the infirmary for making him carry the workload that day. The typically stoic blonde haired male only shrugged and told her to get better soon each time.

While in the infirmary because of her severe injures, she spent a lot of time in there especially with Shoko that was practicing her reverse curse technique on her. They bonded over their love for the K-pop group, Girls Generation.

The chorus of Into the New World blasting through the speakers that Shoko bought comforted her as she felt her bones getting rearranged.

Despite them being best friends for a while now, Y/N still never spent time with Gojo and Geto.

Being a first year student, it's not like Y/N would cross paths with them often especially since the two were always sent out on missions together. She would often hear things from other female classmates that would fangirl over "the strongest duo".

Y/N couldn't say she wasn't any different from them especially since she harbored a huge crush on Geto. She was just more quiet about it as she admired him from afar, taking a look at him each time he was doing his daily evening run through her dorm window.

It wasn't just physical either. It was his personality. He was kind and looked out for the underclassman. There was a time that Haibara wasn't being his usual cheerful self as he was being hard on himself after practice and it was hard to get him out of the mood no matter what Nanami or her did. Later that night when she snuck out to get a drink from the vending machine, she saw Geto talking to him outside of the showers. A smile appearing on his face the next second.

The next morning, Haibara came bearing gifts from Kyoto that he said one of the second years got for them but didn't disclose who. It wasn't hard to put two and two together.

So each day, she found herself wanting to get at least a glimpse of his face. Enough just to see his face but not enough for him to notice her or have a conversation like a normal person would.

Which is why she despised Shoko at the moment.

Shoko wasn't at fault at all though. Heck, the girl doesn't even know about this big fat crush of hers.

But Y/N knowing that the boy she has been pining for the past year was going to be closer to her than he's ever been before. How on earth was she suppose to function now? Should she be flirty? No, that's too much especially when you don't even know how to. Should she be quiet? No, what if he thought she was rude. There was no time to conjure up a script or a personality that would fit today righ-

"Hello."

Stuck in her thoughts, she hadn't realized she was now standing right of him.

Her breath getting caught in her throat, watching how his hair that was normally in a bun was now flowing down to his shoulder. Tied halfway up with a bang that dreamily over his eye. His slightly chapped lips moving as he moved on to greet Shoko, moving his hand up so he could ruffle her hair.

Shoko pushed his hands away in a hurried movement. Quickly wrapping an arm around Y/N's shoulder and pulling her into her side in a tight side hug,"This is Y/N Y/L/N. The first year that I've been telling you about."

"You never told us that she was pretty", Gojo smirked, his glasses tipping down so she could see his bright blue eyes.

Geto only smiled at her, greeting her with the crease of his eyes. Oh my god. That smile. She always saw it when he would be laughing at Gojo's antics but seeing it up close was something else.

Simplest way to put it: the man is gorgeous. Her heart thumped so hard she could feel it in her ears.

"You're a little shy, aren't you?" Gojo teased. Shit, was she just staring in the space again? Shoko pushed him by the shoulder.

"Leave her alone. You two are just too much. I told you to tone it down."

"You two? I haven't even done anything." Geto held his hands up in defense.

"Yet. You haven't done anything yet."

Gojo sheepshly shrugged and immediately hugged Y/N into a tight bear hug. His skinny yet firm frame engulfing her as he swung the two of them around. Over his shoulder, she made eye contact with Geto who tilted his head into her view.

" Anybody that is a good friend of Shoko is also a good friend of mine."

"Mine as well." She heard the white hair male mumble into her shoulder before getting pulled away by Shoko.

"Let's get moving. I got hungry waiting for you guys."

Because they decided to come on a weekend, it was super crowded. No space for any elbow room. Every single teenagers, adults, and their child if they had one was on this street tonight. Trying to snag a picture before pushed out by another person that wanted that same view or angle. Shoko voiced her annoyance each someone accidentally bumped into her. Normally she would be agreeing with her but she could hardly focus on that fact when she could feel Geto's muscular arm that was brushing against her. Remembering to breathe was more important.

She was almost bound to faint from how dizzy she was feeling each time he moved her in closer or out of the way from people rushing by.

It didn't help that she opted to wear a short sleeve dress today that kept flying up so she had to keep her arm down instead of moving it away from his bare arm that was exposed from the muscle tee he chose to wear instead of the school's uniform that she typically saw him in.

This totally changed her peripheral on things. She thought he made the school uniform look fantastic but he looks even better in casual clothing.

"Yo, let's take a picture here. The trees here blocks out the buildings." Gojo pointed out a spot that was a quick walk from them if they fast walked. Shoko groaned, asking if they could eat first but Gojo insisted that it was better to get their photos first so they could just sit down to eat and chill after.

Despite grumbling under her breath, Shoko easily got into line for Gojo's selfie. Gojo continously snapped pictures, the four of them striking poses. Considering how close Geto was to her, she surprisingly was still able to naturally snap poses with the group like she was friends with them for years.

"Oh, I have a polaroid!" She dug into her purse, pulling out the device. She snapped pictures of herself then of Gojo who asked for some.

Y/N found herself giggling at the silly poses that Gojo conjured and Shoko's refusal to waste film if he wasn't going to be serious about it. In the midst of it all, she hadn't noticed Geto was still standing behind her until she felt a tug on the strap out her bag.

Ready to defend herself a potential robber, she only saw Geto looking at the Keroppi keychain on her bag. "This looks familiar."

It was one of the keychain that Haibara got from him that night.

"Oh yeah. One of my classmates, Haibara, gave it to us."

Of course she knew he knew that Haibara was one of her classmates but she didn't want to accidentally slip up that she knew that specific detail about him.

"Funny. The last time I asked Haibara about his keychain, he said that he had to take it off because it got too dirty and the string broke. Nice to see yours is still intact."

"Of course I-"

She cut off herself when she remembered the reason why. It was only still intact because it was from him. Heck, Keroppi wasn't even her favorite character. It was Kuromi but Haibara wanted Kuromi and being the one that was personally gifted all the keychains, he got first choice. Before today, it was the only type of interaction she had of his and a gift was indirectly given to her. Of course, she had to take extra good care of it. Keroppi is still good as new, attached to her purse that she uses every time she goes out.

"Quick! Pose, Y/N!"

Y/N quickly snapped her head back to Shoko whose face was covered with the camera. Maybe it was instinct because Shoko did this almost all the time but she quickly posed with Geto and smiled for the picture.

After watching Shoko put the camera down and pull out the film, Y/N realized the position she put herself into. Eyeing her arms that was wrapped around his one arm with his hand still gripping onto the Keroppi.

"Of course what?"

"I'm in need of smoke break." Shoko waved around the photo for it to develop faster," There's too many people, it's stressing me out. Geto, you in?"

"Or you're just hangry." Gojo hummed, earning him another hit on the shoulder of the day.

"I will be if you don't shut up."

In fear that hell would break lose, Y/N unlatched herself from Geto, missing how his arm seemed to follow her like a magnet. "Gojo, do you want to get some crepes with me?"

Shoko winked over Gojo's shoulder at Y/N at what she considered a great suggestion, raising a thumbs up. As the two walked away, Shoko shouted for her to get as many toppings as she could fit into the treat.

"What does she think? That I'm made out of money?"

"Yes."

_

The nicotine filled stick left Shoko's turned up lips. She stared at the male who had his own cigarette in one hand and in the other, the photo that was taken only five minutes ago.

"You totally weren't expecting that, were you?"

Geto smiling down gleefully at the photo, his wallet pulled out to tuck it into the slot that would typically hold an ID card.

In the photo, Y/N was practically cuddling into his side. Because he was shocked at the sudden intimate interaction, he was looking down at her in the photo. If anybody else had seen the photo and didn't know them, they would've thought that they were a couple.

Which is exactly what Geto loved about the picture.

"You sure you don't want me to put in a good word for you?"

"No, I got it. I’d like it to happen naturally. Plus I don’t even know if she likes me back.”

“ Well you better find out because you begged me to let you come. I didn’t know you were going to bring Gojo with you.”

“ I needed my wingman.”

“That wingman is going to expose you if we don’t get back to them right now.”

“Crap, you’re right.”

After the two of them stomped their cigarettes, they walked back towards where all the food stalls. Geto stopped momentarily at one booth to pick up and buy a Kuromi keychain. Maybe one day he’d buy it all for her.

[iintervallum]

Sometimes I think about how the dndads cast should be on tumblr, with them having a subreddit(you know how they can be) and dndadstwt being like 10 people, tumblr would be the perfect place for them to see more of the fandom, if they wish to that is. Since quite a lot of people on here are way less honed in on negativity than reddit and twitter.

My edit of this is getting long lol so I'm putting it under a cut

Especially reddit, the people on there honestly I think just get too attached to a specific format or way of doing things, its a common pattern in any long running show fandoms i've been in where its reddit that constantly complains about the "good ol' days" and hate any new changes made. I would sometimes drop in and just see a lot of Scary hate at times, or people getting very irritated with the rule breaking, or just complaining that they're "forcing" the humor. I saw a post like that when i just started s2 and that couldnt have been more incorrect (yeah the piss jokes got a bit much but every other part was golden!...pun not intended)

There were absolutely points where I felt my interest wanning, but I think people would get pretty vicious about it and make a lot of mean spirited accusations. Like if anything the things I really enjoyed about this season was how different it was to s1, the contrast was really nice and i liked a lot of the story choices made, i still think about the apollo four teens and the fucking goof realm episodes, they were amazing. Which is why I remember thinking it was odd that they suddenly started involving the dads from s1 more, but knowing now that Anthony was struggling with people not liking this season as much it makes perfect sense.

Idk if it were just me, but i liked the earlier parts of the season for how the teens were still kind of discovering more about themselves and through gathering each anchor, learning more that their parents are people too, with their own fuck ups revealed and the teens have to clean up after them, so having it shift to be about Willy again was a little odd if i'm being honest(I didnt hate it but a repeat villian is hard to do, and for what its worth i think Willy did get the end he deserved and i loved the finale).

Funnily, in its own way it fits the theme of being a teenager and having to live up to your parents expectations. In a meta sense this being the successor to the first season and it being awkward at points and having issues with its identity is very fitting and just like how teenhood actually is.

I've gotten off topic but my point is fandom is just fandom, and letting it influence the way creators can view their own work is an interesting side effect of the internet and the way we navigate with the media we enjoy or hate. And spaces like reddit are grown in a way to encourage more brutally critical ways of analysing media which has very little consideration for the creator. By no means am I saying that the creators of things should be coddled, heck I literally airing my own annoyances with the podcast in space where i'm uplifting the positivity of tumblr over those spaces lol. I just mean that seeing the more genuine side of the fanbase would be more of a better time for them.

EDIT: (I just phrased things better, fixed the spelling and grammer errors and added more thoughts) The more I ruminate on this the more I think that it would honestly be a good idea. Like I do get the base worry of being too close to the more intense side of the fandom, as people on here are unafraid to gush about the show in ways that can be a little much and theres parasociality and all that jazz.

But it would be really good at least to see some actual genuine positivity, so many people provide their thoughtful meta and theories that even if widely off base are just interesting to read through because of how various different people see themselves in the characters they play. And even the critiques people give are not unkind, they come from a place of wanting to understand the choices made better.

I mentioned this in the old version of this post but having a blacklisted tag that only the people who don't wish their post to be seen by the cast use, something along the lines like how the magnus archives fandom has "do not archive", would be a very useful tool to create a barrier in the fanbase. I know i'm someone who feels very nervous about creators seeing the posts I make. Something like "not safe for dads" could work well or any other joke or pun about it being hidden. I doubt it would be filled with discourse or whatever it would mainly be people hornyposting since i know fandom well enough lol.

[gabessquishytum]

https://www.tumblr.com/athymelyreply/741449177837584384/reggyjester-skeletalroses-so-this-is-a?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/phoebo-fugiente/741458451982630912?source=share

--------

So between these two posts taking me out at the knees for different reasons, I now have Corset Thoughts:

Dream is corsetiere and he vends at his local Renaissance Faire. His corsets are all handmade, high quality and absolutely beautiful. He's very popular and his stall is always full of customers, especially because he accommodates so many different body types.

Hob is at the Renaissance Faire with his girlfriend, and it is her goal to get one of Dream's corsets. She's saved up her money, brought her measurements, etc. Hob decides to indulge her and try on one of the men's corsets Dream has available, and he has a million realizations at once about his body and how good it can look in a well fitting corset.

Ultimately, Hob doesn't buy his own corset even though his girlfriend agrees he looks amazing and absolutely deserves to have a nice quality corset of his own. But Hob is saving up money to propose, and he just doesn't have the extra cash to spend it on an impulse. His girlfriend leaves happily with her purchase though and swears they'll be back next year to get her a second one AND Hob's first corset.

One year later, Hob is back but he's alone this time. Turns out they wanted different things in life so they broke up and it's fine. They're still friendly. But Hob hasn't stopped thinking about that corset. Or the gorgeous coset maker at the Faire. And now that he no longer has a girlfriend to buy an engagement ring for, he now has a lot of extra cash to buy himself a corset... or three.

Hi this is so good!!!! I’m super obsessed with corsets in general and I am constantly in awe of corsetieres, their craftsmanship, and their dedication to making things that are size inclusive. The fact that we’re all acknowledging now that men in corsets are fucking incredible is a very good thing indeed.

I’m just imagining Dream’s face lighting up because he remembers Hob from the previous year and was hoping he’d come back. If he’s honest with himself he’s VERY attracted to Hob but he disguises his interest by asking if he can take a few pictures while Hob tries on the various available styles. He’s trying to get as many pictures as possible for his website so he can show that corsets are perfect for everyone! And Hob looks so good, he clearly belongs front and centre in Dream’s new marketing strategy…

So Hob hands over his measurements, and Dream brings out a selection of different designs for him to try. Most are the traditional laced up variety, but he’s also been experimenting with Velcro as some people can’t manage the laces so easy. Hob gushes on about how talented and thoughtful Dream is, and he seems to be completely in his element as he tries each one on and poses for photos. Dream blushes and stammers and asks if Hob’s girlfriend liked her corset? Which leads to Hob explaining about the breakup.

Dream feels a huge sense of relief, and doesn’t feel quite so terrible about the fact that he can’t keep his eyes off Hob’s fantastic tits. The way the corset compresses the fabric of his shirt and makes absolutely sure that his chest hair is visible is driving Dream wild. His hands are shaking so much, he’s not even sure if the pictures he’s taking will be in focus.

Hob finally decides which corsets he’ll be taking home, and he can’t resist kissing the back of Dream’s hand in thanks. And when he cautiously asks if Dream would care to meet him at the mead tent when he’s due for a break, Dream nearly abandons his stall altogether just at the mere offer. Luckily, one of the other vendors offers to watch his stall for a bit, so Hob is able to spirit Dream away just for a little while. Yes, they do spend the whole time making out in a quiet corner, and yes, Dream does finally cop a feel of the Hoboobies.

Hob is about to have sooooo many pretty outfits designed just for him, the lucky bastard. In all fairness, he was absolutely made to wear corsets. Dream definitely isn’t letting him go!

[justladders]

Hello! I’m Ladders :)

I'm just here stylizing some fnaf characters and mostly drawing the evil green rabbit like an animated villain.

Basically, I always loved animated shows and movies. They're why I started drawing when I was little, and I still watch and pull ideas from that kind of stuff to this day. Classic Disney's my fav, so you might see me talking about it sometimes. Anyways, since villains are my favorite and since I've starting drawing fnaf stuff, it's mainly been art of Springtrap, which you'll see a lot here.

If you're ever just looking for my art, the tag is #laddersarts. More tag stuff at the bottom of the post. Also, love asks, but please be considerate about the ask box, ty.

Do not repost my art anywhere, even with credit. I'm fine with it being used for things like a profile picture/banner as long as it is credited.

vv FAQ / TAG GUIDE vv

Q: What art program do you use? Krita. It's free and it "works," which is all I ask for.

Q: Do you do commissions? This answer will change around: currently, no. I've been meaning to, honestly, but just haven't felt collected enough to make a comm sheet and whatnot. Hopefully I'll be able to update this soon though.

Q: What are your other socials? I currently don't have any others, so if you see my art somewhere else, it's stolen :)

Q: Why do you draw [insert character] like that? I normally get this question about Springtrap, but I like to make designs that lend themselves more to 2D animation, which means simplifying a lot of things and hopefully still being able to get the point across. Too much detail and it becomes complicated very quickly. Fnaf animatronics/characters lend themselves really nicely to stylization because of how simple in concept they are overall. They're also left up to a lot of different characterization potential, not just from their simple designs, but the fact that they don't really get super hard-established personalities. Basically, all of that comes together into me enjoying taking a base concept and turning it into something you could potentially see in some older hand-drawn cartoon. As far as *specific* choices for how I draw *specific* characters, I feel like those would each need their own posts especially for Springtrap since I draw him the most. I know I'll have to make that sometime.

Q: Can I draw fanart of your designs? Of course! I'd just like to be credited and tagged so I can see it and reblog it :D

Tag Guide laddersarts and not my art - arts that I post or ones that I reblog (my art tag is all stuff since I got back earlier this year, art before that I just tagged as "my art") justtalks and talkin disney - indulgent tangents justfrens - things from peeps I know and whatnot answered ask - stuff from the inbox goofies - silly stuff midnight magma things - arts from group canvas drawing fanart for me :0 - fanarts of my designs!!!!! :0 present for springtrap :) - ask series where y'all wanted to give Springtrap something nice (there's a line formed and I just get to them whenever I'm up for it, but feel free to add to it) alt springtrap - art of goofy alternate versions of Springtrap I make sometimes: there's currently Vamptrap, Mothtrap, Jackotrap, and ERRORtrap (suggestive, eyestrain, flashing, gore, and all that stuff some people might not want to see I will hopefully remeber to tag)

[happilychee]

do fairy tail characters nap?

just woke up from a nap. recommend.

♡ as annoying as this is to her, lucy always falls asleep when she reads. it takes forever for her to get through a book! it's just so soothing, especially if the story is compelling and lulls her in... bonus points if she's on a train or in a car; the rocking motion will have her out like a light.

♡ levy has no trouble getting through books because it gets her excited, not tired. she doesn't let lucy forget this. she does, however, stay up until ungodly hours of the night to finish a story. gajeel, jet, droy, and lily have found her passed out over a book (or twenty) multiple times. I think she's always buzzing with energy or curiosity, so one of the only ways for levy to settle in is if gajeel literally lies on top of her like a weighted blanket.

♡ speaking of, gajeel is very neutral about naps. he doesn't actively seek them out, mostly because he's one of the few members of the guild who has a relatively normal sleep schedule. he is, however, soft as hell. levy and lily always nap on him. wendy will nap on him. juvia will nap on him. gajeel looks scary asf if he glares, so no one will bother whoever's sleeping by his side. he is also actually very squishy if he relaxes his muscles. 10/10 pillow.

♡ cana naps like nobody's business. she goes out at night, stays up late drinking or partying, and crashes at 3am in gray or loke's bed. there is no "schedule" to sleeping so she will sleep whenever and wherever. cana has the uncanny ability to fall asleep anywhere. slumped over a table in a guild hall while natsu and gray throw chairs at each other? out like a light. lying on a freezing cold bench while her and lucy wait for a train? snoring away. (lucy pulls cana's head into her lap.) cana rarely falls asleep in an actual bed, though. if she does, it's because she's dead tired, and she's been incentivized by cuddles.

♡ natsu looooves a good nap. him and happy cat nap all the time. this might actually be the only consistent thing in their schedules: nap. the entire guild knows, courtesy of mirajane, to stfu for a bit when 1 o'clock hits. they don't actually need to, because natsu could sleep through a storm, but it's the thought that counts. natsu is also really warm and cuddly, which means that he's the perfect napping buddy. being buried in his warm arms, snug as a bug with happy between you... truly the dream.

♡ gray hates naps. hates them!! all because he wakes up the way you wake up from an after-school nap: sweaty, dizzy, disoriented, in a different dimension, with an overwhelming sense of dread. he reveals this one night when he and lucy are plastered at a bar, and that he's slightly jealous of natsu. lucy resolves to fix this, and when they're both blackout drunk she drags him into bed with her. not quite a nap, but hey, gray woke up feeling nice.

♡ sting might be the only character in the fairy tail universe that goes to bed at 10pm. his sleep schedule is on point, so he doesn't really nap unless he's exhausted from running sabertooth's infirmary. he will snuggle up in a square of sunlight with lector and snooze away.

♡ what is a nap? minerva doesn't nap. she doesn't need to rest during the day, she has things to do, what are you talking about- oh. oh. I think sabertooth has a very luxurious library, and minerva knocks out on one of the plush purple couches. more often than not, frosch will worm their way into her arms. the only people who dare to mention her naps are yukino (who minerva has a soft spot for) and sting (who has no sense of self-preservation).

[avonne-writes]

hm I think its very interesting that although u think buck bottoms more, they're still willing to switch (I really agree with this take and I actually think it makes the most sense). how do u think sex changes when who tops/bottoms changes and why do u think they each prefer both (basically what im saying is what is it about bottoming and topping that's each of their favourite parts)!

It's always interesting to talk about these intimacy headcanons! These can differ vastly based on how you interpret the characters, but this is my take on it.

Headcanons under the cut:

In general, how sex changes for them

If Bucky bottoms, it's rougher, which is what he wants. He knows he shouldn't be rough the other way around.

On normal days, regardless of who tops or bottoms, Gale helps calm Bucky's excitable energy. He's more in control of the situation.

On Gale's vulnerable days, he’s going to bottom and will put everything into Bucky's hands.

Buck's personal preferences

When he bottoms, it feels like an affirmation of trust to him, and it's something he likes to give to Bucky.

As a bottom, he likes not having to wonder if it's good enough because it's obvious from how hard Bucky is.

He likes the weight of Bucky's body on him, of Bucky manhandling him and holding him in the position they want. It makes him feel so safe and loved. Usually, he's still calling the shots but if he’s having one of those submissive nights all of this is amplified. (you will see in detail in the subspace fic)

This isn’t something conscious but he also just enjoys being given things, and yes, that includes a certain part of Bucky's body.

Finally, just something as simple as the physical sensation - he just loves that kind of deep, slowly building pleasure you get from prostate stimulation more than the faster but shallower sensation of topping.

Topping is nice too, and he especially likes how he can basically fuck the restlessness out of Bucky if he does it well.

That said, he’s flexible about top-bottom roles and quite inflexible about submission and dominance. He’ll keep the reins in his hands for the most part on normal days and submit completely on difficult days. By this I mean on normal days, he doesn’t mind or even likes that Bucky doesn’t submit to him and there's always this playful push back, but he won't relinquish the final say. He'll keep the control. But on submissive days, he doesn’t make any decisions and can’t be provoked to take back control. He'd just end the encounter if Bucky tried.

Obviously, his submission is a bit of a whiplash at first but it all starts to make sense to Bucky when he realizes it comes from a combination of deep trust + emotional distress + inability to articulate a need for comfort + inability to accept comfort unless he’s made to take it.

Bucky's personal preferences

It's likely that the only person he has ever bottomed for is Gale. Even if he had other sexual contact with men before, he’s too big and doesn’t have the personality to draw attention from tops. He was a womanizer too, so being on the receiving end is something way less familiar to him.

He loves bottoming the most when it hurts just right. He has masochistic tendencies so the pain of that stretch makes him rock hard. He always tries to goad or urge Gale into putting it in after only the slightest prep.

He also likes play-fighting and wrestling, and if Gale tops, he’ll constantly try to move and squirm and buck against him just to make Gale put him harder in his place. (He's a brat)

He prefers topping because of 1) the visuals(!!), 2) the sensations - yes, he prefers something tight squeezing around him to something hard pushing into him, 3) he loves giving things, including that certain body part 😉, 4) he loves the idea that he’s of service as a man.

He likes putting his entire body weight on Gale even in a non-sexual way, but even more so when they're making love. He had to be more careful with the women he slept with, but not with Gale.

Gale's submissive nights are a challenge to him but they’re also the most rewarding.

These are the headcanons that came to my mind at the moment but I feel like there are more things that can be said about this. What do you guys think?