#which is responsible for fight or flight

[mrtheinsatiable]

Starting to realize I've been unnecessarily resistant to a lot of ideas because I was just looking at them from an angle I didn't like

The idea of a "purpose driven life" is one of those things. The whole "I was Created for a Purpose" thing didn't vibe with me and also kind of pissed me off and that was pretty much the only context I had for the idea for a long time. And even the more secular version where I create my own purpose didn't work either because I've never felt like I had any particular calling or thing I Have to Do. It also feels dehumanizing to think of it that way, to a certain extent, to have a specific purpose or use like a tool or an object.

But actually a purpose driven life doesn't have to mean Having a Purpose it can just be "doing things on purpose." Life becomes a lot easier and also more fulfilling when you act with intent instead of just letting yourself loose in the day. It's hard to get your shit together when you're winging every second. A sense of purpose doesn't actually need to be deeper than that, I think, to positively influence your life

[dizzybevvie]

"Kingdom Hearts is so complicated" "Nomura made it up as he went along" "KH makes no sense" Have you considered that Riku is 15 and autistic and gay bc if you do I think itll change things

[mercutiotakethewheel]

Kendra, inwardly: Omg I am so scared right now. I’m going to die here. This freakyass magical creatures about to do me in. And could do so easily, which I am imagining very vividly right now. Those are huge teeth. I am fighting god to hold it together right now. I don’t want to die. Why am I here? Just to suffer, every night I close my eyes and—

Kendra, outwardly: I cast vicious mockery.

[boynextdoorcoverpoison]

I think the funniest part of jaehyun being leader is that in a lot of other groups it’s often the members flustering the leader but with bonedo you end up with

like boynextdoor leader myung jaehyun is also their chaotic “what will he do/say next?” member and I love that for them

[mars-ipan]

overcoming anxiety (through practicing the things that scare you) is so interesting. i used to be horrified of taking up space or alerting other people of my presence. now i'm compelled to tell strangers i like their outfits or hair or earrings- on bad days i tell maybe a quarter of them. do i still overthink it? absolutely. but i call attention to myself to tell someone else my opinion. and with the way they tend to smile and tell me "thank you!" i'm pretty sure it's taken to heart.

i used to be horrified of making phone calls as well. this is one i'm still getting over- i just Don't Like Doing It. i used to have a phone call routine that i still joke about- realize i need to call someone, cry, avoid it for a few days, suck it up, write a script, memorize the script, cry again, final script read, make the call with the script in front of me. and i would be Exhausted by the end of it. i don't cry when i need to call people anymore. i'm even needing scripts less and less- i've found out that people actually won't kill me if i talk a little too fast or stumble on my words. i doubt i'll ever like making phone calls- i especially hate robots (i'm afraid they'll mishear me and direct me wrong or a person will suddenly show up and i won't be prepared)- but i can make them now.

i get overwhelmed really easy. just a thing that happens to me. my brain is really really good at taking one task and breaking it up into thousands of little tasks and it feels like i'm drowning. if i try to make it fewer larger tasks then it starts to feel insurmountable. i was completely lost on how to deal with this (other than avoid until you get that panic attack and can do work in the post-catharsis calm until 6:00 AM) until one night when my dad (who i often meet late at night due to overlapping mental illness symptoms) asked me how to eat an elephant. i looked at him, confused, and he said "one bite at a time." that was way more effective than any other analogy i've seen has been. "light at the end of a tunnel"- i don't feel like i'm moving forward, i feel like i'm scaling a wall. "steps on a trail"- i can see my destination, but it feels impossible to move forward. but eating an elephant? that sums it up perfectly. this huge task which seems impossible at a glance. but it must be done. so you eat the elephant, a bite at a time. every time i'm overwhelmed i repeat that phrase to myself. it hasn't made any major changes yet, but it keeps me calm enough to start before i hit the panic attack, which i'll take.

i was such a perfectionist growing up- i actually thought it was a good thing (school always taught me to strive for perfection). but it made me scared to try new things- if i wasn't immediately good at them, then it clearly wasn't for me. i'm still not great at starting new hobbies, but i try a lot of new things within the hobbies i already have. i test out different ways of making art, i try new puzzle games i don't understand, etc. and the feeling of steady improvement reminds me that i don't need to be good right away. some of the most satisfying moments don't come from immediately being good- they come from achieving that skill over time. i'd like to try to learn to sew soon.

idk it's interesting. i rewire my own brain's fear response by doing the Horrifying Thing enough times for me to understand that no i will not die. and while i'm doing it it feels like nothing is changing. i get so stressed every time- it can actually take a lot out of me (turns out fight-or-flight burns a lot of energy). but i look back at then vs. now and i realize how far i've come, and i can't help but think "huh. neat"

[ink-asunder]

Im glad that the dragons dogma community is so positive and patient this time around. I mean, DD1 players weren't particularly unkind (they were hands down a pretty chill group in my experience), but it was a videogame in 2012, which means every forum thread had at least one person saying "get gud loser" no matter the context. At least now most forum posts are filled with comments of people not just commiserating, but like admitting to crying about stuff and other people saying "yeah it's frustrating, no shame in letting the tears flow." Like yeah I'm gonna celebrate a less toxic community environment. Hooray for love in a fandom for a game that is canonically about love.

[mutalune]

I’m not a fan of “well this character had it worse actually :/“ opinions tbh, esp when you’re lowkey making that judgment call based on what you personally think would be worse rather than by any objective measure (as there is no objective measure of suffering nor can there ever be if u ask me)

also b/c it ain’t gotta be the suffering Olympics babes it’s 2023 everyone’s out here suffering and it’s all valid and even little-t-trauma can fuck some ppl up whereas Big-T-Trauma can be brushed off by some ppl, it’s really up to the individual’s perception of “how bad” something was and their own responses and resiliency.

if u ask me it really doesn’t benefit anyone to belittle other people’s suffering (Aziraphale’s) just b/c you think another person (Crowley) had it worse, ESPECIALLY when that Another Person (Crowley) would probs be the first to comfort the first person’s (Aziraphale’s) suffering and give them a big cup of cocoa and a soft blanket ☕️

[bucky-boychik-barnes]

Planning on spending the workday researching fight or flight behaviors in Jackson Galaxy videos, while simultaneously listening to a Moby Dick audiobook.

Gonna be an interesting day.

[toastsnaffler]

I was on the wikipedia page for phobias just for fun but just discovered theres an actual word for a fear of being touched.. 🥹

[sickmachete]

no mulder a common stress hormone being found in the victims body is not proof of alien abductions .

[t-lostinworlds]

oh my god Please watch daredevil matt murdock is *chef's kiss* also I love frank castle so much and also billy russo even though he's [redacted spoiler] (russo is a character in the punisher which spins off from daredevil)

i knooooow. i've been meaning to i swear but i need to be in the right *mood* (as with every show/movie i want to watch ksksks) but i just know i'm going to add him to my list of murderous baby girls when i do watch it LMAO. i also saw gifs of those two! but gosh the category of fictional men is starting to get specific isn't it sksksks

[lightningfilledsaber]

I AM THE FUCKING KING OF COMMUNICATION

[love-has-a-way-ofgrowingbackward]

so do y'all know that i supressed my reflexes once

[malewifehenrycooldown]

Slightly long, ramble vent-ish post but also some negative observations of the wider self ship community that has been bothering me a little bit.

sometimes I don’t want to be in the self ship community anymore (not that I considered myself part of it from the beginning) because said the community creates these small pocket communities of the same people interacting with each other and that’s fair and totally fine!

It’s just that up to a certain point, these pocket communities start to create an isolating and alien environment for newcomers and this is not helped by the community’s genuinely bad communication skills. Like I genuinely wonder how many blogs have deactivated due to lack of interactivity (a whole can of worms no one likes talking about apparently. HI REBLOG:LIKE RATIO) and the overwhelmingly intimidating environment for younger folks (teens - early 20s) to navigate, especially people who may not be as critical or conscious of the media they consume (and don’t understand how they could be harming people through consuming specific pieces of fiction). I remember one person straight up left due to the lack of communication and it really, really sucks because just an open conversation can really ease peoples fears and worries. People just should not have to feel like walking on eggshells all the damn time in the community and if they feel that way then there is something SEVERELY WRONG with this community but no one cares to address it

Like I’ve already left a few self discord servers, and blocked some users, and now I just don’t see any point really being in the community anymore, because there’s been multiple occasions when I’ve interacted with a user and then it turns out that said user probably has some personal issues they need to sort out, but constantly deflect blame or disregard anyone’s advice to change their actions/attitudes for the better or that they really need to get actual professional help. Like obviously we should call out bad behaviour but also know that you should encourage these people to change saidd behaviours for the better.

Idk maybe I’m cursed on tumblr to interact with people who turn out to be not that great or I’m just too naive because I believe that people are inherently good. Maybe I’m a fool for wanting to see the good in people and wanting to support them, all at the cost of me ignoring all the red flags that are obviously in front of me. Which to be fair is probably reasonable; fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice shame on me for not knowing better I should have heeded the red flags when I saw them. /serious

[roobylavender]

but also what ends up being the problem in lrb is not only the bias against the external third party but the fact that the relationship actually being written is written terribly. what is most confusing to me about why people enjoy db and bc as they’re written currently is that the writing utterly sucks balls and doesn’t even do service to the characters involved, esp the women, who exist as nothing more than props

[djungleskogs]

found out literally like most of my coworkers have been friends outside of work this entire time….