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#which is still nothing to sneeze at
cuz-reasons · 8 months
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Summary: Emmet takes Ingo out flying.
Hey yall remember chapter 3?
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snzluv3r · 6 months
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i love having a snzfucker girlfriend so much she makes me feel so attractive and special in moments that i’ve normally been made to feel gross and embarrassed and small, like i should be ashamed of things i can’t control.
not only does she treat me with kindness and patience when i’m having a horrible allergy attack and can do nothing but sniffle and sneeze, she makes me feel pretty and worth loving and even sexy and it’s so special and i’m never going to get used to it
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The love/hate relationship with my coworkers is so real lmao like why are they like this
#not snz#I'm just having fun#tho there has been sneezing bc there's so much fucking dust everywhere#I've been at the station for a hot minute#bc most of our guys are still out on fires#so there's just like nobody here#and i like money so I'm vibing with getting paid for being here extra days#but there's just a few of us here rn and we have like nothing to do bc we're hardly getting assignments#so we're just fucking around#and i have like the first responder version of cards against humanity#so we're playing that to kill the time and it's great lmao#but also some of them were asking me random questions#bc apparently the answers and explanations you give say somrthing about you idk#it was some bullshit but we were having fun with it#but the way they were laughing at every single answer i gave like hello#you fucking asked lmao#the nerve tho when they asked for an animal i like and three reasons why#and then said that that's how people view me and scream laughed bc 'it's accurate' like bro fuck off lmao#but i am having a good time like i adore these guys#they drive me crazy but that's my second family right there#plus with all the free time we get I've been trying different recipes and so far no complaints lmao#made a pasta dish tonight that was a big hit bc literally everything was from scratch incuding the noodles#like that's how much time we have lmao#anyway tonight is my last night at the station then i can go home which is a relief#we've all been sleeping on the floor and couches lmao#there are bunkhouses but the women's quarters are unusable so we're all staying in the rec building instead#i told them it was fine and they could stay in the bunkhouse but they were appalled by the suggestion lmao#so we're all vibing rn watching tv and I've literally never felt like I've belonged somewhere more so I'm thriving#anyway I'll probably delete this later I'm just happy rn lmao
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dreamlogic · 11 months
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quietly getting more & more annoyed at my housemate & her bf as the evening goes on. thought they were at his house this weekend but they showed up unexpectedly to have loud sex here, left for a little bit, came back in the middle of a fight, and are now watching tv really loudly in between continuing to totally-not-fight-everything's-FINE.
#ctxt#shit chat#they're both rly nice people who genuinely love each other a lot & have been together like 7 years#but in the time i've known them they just keep playing out the same maladaptive patterns together and it's painful to watch#one of them will be irritable for some reason and snap at the other; other responds by airing a deep-seated grievance they've been sittin on#and instead of just. having a conflict about it to its conclusion to resolve the issue they just both fall over themselves apologizing#and spend several hours being really touchy & reactive to little things but overwhelmingly gentle/reassuring/affectionate#person A: *snaps* im sorry baby i didn't mean it i'm just stressed i love you so much can i do anything for you?#person B: no no my love you're fine i'm not mad i understand can i do anything for YOU you're so special i care about you so much#*make out in the kitchen about it a bit. swap roles rinse & repeat*#like i know turning towards a loved one after conflict instead of giving them the cold shoulder is a sign of emotional maturity#and is generally a healthy communication habit#but like. you gotta actually HAVE the conflict first instead of glossing over it the minute difficult emotions come up???#and when they get in these loops i really think they should just. agree on a mutual time out to do their own thing for a day#calm down sort themselves out and then come back together to mend things#instead of just reflexively drawing closer together immediately to try and smother discontent#which just results in them still being upset and now tripping over each other bumping elbows exacerbating things#while being obnoxiously saccharine to cover it up#i mean. 7 yrs is nothing to sneeze at but imo this is. not a sustainable way of relating & building a life together#and it sucks to watch it play out. reminds me of my parents who were blissfully incompatible in a similar way for like 30 years#before it finally blew up spectacularly with a lot of collateral damage earlier this year.
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xcziel · 1 year
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Heads-up for any US K-pop fans
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This weekend - Friday June 2 through Sunday June 4 - all kpop albums at Barnes & Noble 10% off
this discount WILL combine with the premium Membership Card discount, which will mean an additional 10% off for those who have cards
and it DOES also include the new Stray Kids and Enhypen comeback releases
supposedly there will also be giveaway swag? but it will vary from store to store, so check with your local B&N if you're curious!
(you can also buy/reserve specific versions on the website to pick up in the store, if you're worried about waiting til you have time to drop by, or wasting a trip)
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Putting one specific antagonist of mine under the microscope to figure out how the fuck he managed to get away with being emperor for like. Almost half a millenia before anyone came along and beat his ass
#honestly the 'almost half a millenia' thing is even more insane considering the only reason he's even lived that long is a curse that has#killed dragons the size of a small planet. i'm honestly convinced he could've lasted the whole millenia and gotten a good chomp out of a go#if he were less of a typical noble of his era insisting to send away his offspring to be raised as wards to noble families until their#coming of age where they would either make a brief but bombastic entrance into administration or quietly disappear between the lines of#history. i do like to think that the wanderer would've obliterated the emperor the moment he got his teeth sunk into his magic because as#much as the wandered is a failure of a god who sows more heartache than blessings whever he goes he was still one of the people who brought#about the age of heroes after defeating the dragon of ver thramnes (which was a regular sized dragon but still nothing to sneeze at)(i doub#even the god of the hearth could fight one of the planet sized dragons and his whole thing is that after ascending to godhood he#became a great big dog up in the sky!)#also a sidebar on how curses and hauntings work in that universe but like. they are not born out of spite or malice but rather from love#it makes curses and blessings hard to distinguish in that way but like. in the age of technlogy all magic is a curse so it's really all so#circumstantial. magic is easily compelled by desire after all only to become unruly when coerced into a form which goes against its nature#anyways. i'm rambling. i'll go now#boo rambles
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faerun · 2 months
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ummmmm just found out my restaurant i work at got bought by another company and were all getting raises next month yippee yippee
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infizero · 4 months
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ok thank you green for coming to be our local red expert. are you gay or something
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augustinewrites · 1 year
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“itadori, please respect his personal space—”
“kugisaki! stop hitting him—”
“megumi, don’t you dare bring that elephant out in my classroom—”
peace and quiet is short-lived whenever the first years are around.
you manage to quiet them down with the threat of assigning an essay, allowing you a moment’s respite to massage your temples and lean back in your seat, glancing at your phone to check just how many minutes you have left with them.
a notification pops up as you do, bringing on a whole new headache.
[satoru]: send nudes?
you quickly turn your phone over so it’s screen-down, face burning as you look around to make sure no one had seen.
peace and quiet is also short-lived whenever satoru calls out sick. because the strongest sorcerer of your time…currently has a cold.
he is, predictably, very dramatic whenever he’s sick. a mild fever means he puts himself on bedrest. a sore throat means he needs to be spoon fed a very specific homemade soup.
but the worst…oh, the worst is when he has a cold.
when satoru’s sinuses are clogged, he’s an absolute menace to deal with. his sneezes shake the apartment and his whines about sinus pressure are all you hear at the dinner table.
luckily, the students have resorted to quietly bothering each other, so you slowly turn your phone back around to deal with the man child who is likely littering the living room floor with tissues.
he’s stuck at home, which means he’s got nothing to do but annoy you.
[satoru]: haha jk
[satoru]: unless…?
huffing, you quickly type back a response.
[you]: NOT funny. i’m at work.
[satoru]: so what you’re saying is you’ll send them during lunch right ;)
“miss!” itadori shouts, his arm raised. “can fushiguro come to the arcade with us after class?”
“of course,” you say. “but please don’t forget to finish your essays on cursed technique origins. it’s due on monday.”
yuuji’s practically bouncing in his seat as he grabs megumi’s arm. hear that, fushiguro? you hear as you pick up your phone. your mom said yes!
megumi, who usually comes home on the weekends, still looks to you for approval. you assure him with a small nod and smile.
sometimes you just want to wrap him up in your arms and never let go. he may have been another couple’s blessing, but ultimately he’s yours and gojo’s pride and joy. possibly the only one you have left, as it stands.
thought you’re a little sad that he won’t be home for dinner tonight, you remind yourself that he’s growing up. for as long as you’ve known him, he’s always been a sort of lone wolf. but a lone wolf is still a wolf, and a wolf needs a pack.
he’s finally found friends he’s comfortable with, and it’s good that he wants to spend time with them and vice versa.
your phone buzzes insistently in your hand.
[satoru]: pleeeeeaaaase?
[satoru]: i think it’ll really help with my recovery…
[satoru]: if this cold kills me the last thing i want to see is a picture of you
oh, that’s actually kind of—
[satoru]: nude, preferably
maybe it’s a good thing megumi won’t be home tonight. you don’t need any witnesses to the crime you’re about to commit.
[you]: what’ll help with your recovery is a visit to the infirmary.
there’s a short pause, then you watch the little bubble appear and disappear about six times.
[satoru]: shit
[satoru]: is this a scene?
you roll your eyes, waving at the kids as they head out to catch the train.
[you]: i hate you
he doesn’t answer, so you get up to hurry over to your office, shutting and locking the door behind you.
you wait a moment, opening the camera on your phone as you do so.
once the sound of footsteps echoing through the hall disappears, you start unbuttoning the first few buttons of your shirt—
you scream when a loud sneeze startles you, satoru suddenly appearing at your side.
he doesn’t miss a beat, plucking a tissue from your desk and blowing his nose loudly. he throws it in the general direction of the bin before slapping his palm onto your desk.
you can tell he’s attempting to be some sort of seductive, but it’s dampened bu the way he sniffles loudly, his face a little red.
“hello, doctor,” he says, a lazy grin spread across his face. “i’m here for my physical.”
“honey,” you laugh, gently cupping the sides of his face. “you need to rest.”
“but ‘m not tired,” he pouts, leaning in to nose at your neck. his skin is warm against yours, much too warm for your liking.
you tangle your fingers in his hair, scratching lightly at his scalp. “since i’m your doctor, i’m prescribing a nap.”
“a nap does sound kind of nice…”
he gets up, taking your hand and dragging you over to the couch with him. he locks you within his embrace, sighing contentedly as he presses you to his chest.
“wait, satoru i have to supervise the second years’ training—”
it’s too late. he’s already asleep, snoring loudly in your ear.
so you take out your phone and text nanami, asking if he can cover for you this afternoon.
because a sick satoru is a needy satoru, and you won’t be leaving this couch for a while.
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krysmcscience · 3 months
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It’s finally done, guys – five whole pages of Narilamb AU comic AND MORE be upon you! (If you have trouble reading any of the text, view the full-size! These pages are huge!)
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Yeesh, this took forever. <:)
There’s probably a ton of inconsistencies and anatomy/perspective wonkeries, but this was mostly just comic practice, so Oh Hekkin Well, Lol <:D
(Yes, I am aware the Gateway’s door isn’t present in the Afterlife, and the actual way in is just a pentagram portal. Yes, I put the door in there anyway because Artistic License, i.e. it felt more impactful for there to be a prison door of sorts to walk through to freedom, rather than just a bland boring portal on the ground. 😠)
anyway, i hate backgrounds so much lmao
Alternate ending and a buttload of bonus art under the cut, followed by goofy AU rambles and headcanon stuff:
I’m calling it the Revival AU. It’s not all that creative a title, and someone else has probably used it already, but I am too lazy to really care, LOL
Alternate ending page, which you will Definitely need to view the full-size for, Whoopsie Daisy:
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The alternate ending was actually the first ending I finished things off with, because I had a brief badbrain moment where I forgot the emotional beat I initially wanted the comic to end on, and I tend to write comedy, anyway. I later remembered and drew out the proper ending, but I preserved and finished this one, too, because it still makes me giggle.
They had to go back for the followers off-screen in the AU’s real ending. And by ‘they’ I mean just the Lamb, because they weren’t about to ask three newly freed cats to go back into what used to be their prison. The Lamb DID spend some time watching Narinder and the bois enjoying the outdoors first, though:
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In other news, here’s the Lamb and me making fun of my anatomy-drawing ‘skills’:
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Meanwhile, if you’re wondering why the Lamb is just a-okay with how things went down vis a vis Their Murder, this bonus comic should answer at least some of your questions:
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Ah, yes, also this is how they get engaged outside of the alternate ending. Forgot to mention that bit. XD (I already refuse to believe that Narinder is capable of flirting normally, so why would his initial marriage proposal be any better???)
Oh, and before any of them get a chance to actually head back to the cult grounds, there is one potential problem:
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And by ‘problem’ I mean something Narinder intends to ignore for At Minimum a thousand years. Cuz he’s a petty bitch like that. :D
what do you mean i drew the lamb too tall compared to the background? clearly they’re standing on top of baal and aym lmao, why else would you think those two aren’t in this one??? (aym and baal got way too excited about finally being outside, you see, and their silly modes are nothing to sneeze at)
And, speaking of heading back to the cult grounds, I’m sure y’all would love to know how the Lamb’s followers felt about the brand new change in management:
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It all went better than expected. <:D Tiny ramble now, feel free to skip down to the next comic.
Before you ask, no, the Lamb does not have any actual powers anymore, other than the immortality Narinder definitely grants them. The Red Crown just thinks it’s funny to suggest otherwise, and Narinder does nothing to discourage this. Also, the Lamb and Narinder aren’t actually married here yet, but, uh. Pretty safe to say that particular ritual directly follows the events of this comic. XD
Given how quickly he mellows out in canon, Narinder probably chills out a lot in this AU once he’s in charge of the cult, too, if only because 1.) He’s finally free, and 2.) He’s equally smitten with and distracted by the Lamb. He’s definitely in charge at least 95% of the time, though, because the Lamb never actually wanted to be a cult leader and, now that their time as a vessel is done, they just want to be a normal(ish) sheep who’s wholly devoted to their hot new divine husband.
Some followers do still have some valid concerns about these two being together, though, which I’m sure at least a few of you might share…
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Unfortunately for any such concerns, the Lamb is a bonafide masochist in this AU. :D
They’re also 100% a sub, obviously
Anyone at all: Your relationship is problematic and potentially toxic
The Lamb: fuck yeah it is, it’s so hot~ OuO
Here’s just the last panel, made transparent for whatever nefarious purposes y’all might have for it:
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Additional exchange Narinder and the Lamb have at some point, probably after the Lamb does a fatal whoopsie while out on a mission trip or in response to things getting a little too sadistic in the bedroom, ahaha:
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Look, there is a very important distinction between life and death, and if you don’t understand that, then you’re probably not worthy of being the God of Death, anyway. (At least, according to Narinder, and ONLY Narinder.)
Last but not least, have these shittens:
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~Such creative naming conventions I have utilized, lololol~ :D Anyway, there's a few deets on them in the rambles down below.
The rest is all ramble, so before I get to that, I’ll just say – likes and especially reblogs are very much appreciated!!! :D If you happen to really really REALLY like my stuff, meanwhile, I do have a link in my bio to my ko-fi page, where I’m accepting commissions and donations if you’re especially generous… ÓuÒ
Now, BE FREE IF YOU AIN’T DOWN FOR READING MY GOOFY RAMBLES
First ramble is re: Baal’s question of ‘Did it really work?’, since I didn’t feel like expanding on it in the comic proper, and it’s arguably pretty vague? He doesn’t ask because he doubts Narinder or his capabilities, exactly, but because neither Baal nor Aym have ever actually seen their god at full power before (he’s still technically not at full power here, either). It’s not expressly stated how soon the brothers were brought to Narinder after his imprisonment, but whether it was early on or after a length of time for Shamura to (somewhat) recover from his attack, he must have already been weakened, since I have no doubts that there was a huge battle that accompanied the Bishops working together to trap him. So, between that fight with all four of his siblings, sharing his power with a variety of vessels over time, and being chained immobile for a thousand years, he must have been severely weakened by the time he lent the Red Crown out to the Lamb, which would have only weakened him further.
I like to think this is how the Lamb is able to defeat him if they refuse to be sacrificed, despite how it took all four Bishops working together to subdue and chain Narinder in the first place.
All that aside, the three cats have been trapped in the Afterlife for so long that Baal also wanted verbal reassurance that they are all, indeed, actually able to leave it now – something that I headcanon isn’t possible without a significant amount of power (i.e. the Red Crown’s cooperation with its bearer/vessel).
(On a semi-related note, I don’t headcanon Aym and Baal as twins. I like sweetheart big bro Baal and snarky little goth bro Aym too much to have them be that close in age.)
Ah, teeny thing: If you noticed I switched up the art style for Narinder on the second page, that was intentional. It's sort of a visual indicator that there has been a Big Change for him - that being, how much power he has after sacrificing the Lamb. As for why I changed up his arms in the grass rollin' pic, I don't really subscribe to the notion that his arms are spooky bones because they're horrifically injured (beyond chain-chafing scars, that is), but rather just because he's the Bishop of Death, so he can change how normal-to-spooky they look at will. At some point I might doodle out how I imagine his appearance to range between least to most eldritch... 🤔
Next ramble, regarding Narinder’s feelings towards the Lamb...he was initially too focused on being freed from his imprisonment to form any real attachment to them. They were a tool for his use, first and foremost, but he did notice their intense devotion towards him. It was impossible not to notice, because the Lamb was always very happy to see him, even if it was because they died during a crusade (yet again). He wasn’t originally planning to revive them once he was freed, either, because he saw no real point to it – after all, they were already dead when they first met him, just as any other mortal would be when meeting him in the Afterlife, so death has very little real consequence in his eyes. But, once the chains were off, and it really sank in that he stood to lose the most devoted follower he’s ever had, he decided…why put their soul to rest for good or leave them stuck in the Afterlife when he could just as easily revive them again? And why not reward them for their hard work, anyway? Not only would it cost him nothing by comparison, but the future devotion that could come of it would surely make up for his (bare minimum) effort in reviving them.
He wasn’t expecting to get a full dose of that devotion and a smiling face so soon after killing them, though~ :3c (because the Lamb is a bonafide freak, and not-so-secretly into the fucked up power dynamics going on here, lol)
I should mention here that I am firmly of the belief that any non-god/vessel who crosses through the Gateway and into the Afterlife just straight up dies. So, Aym and Baal? Also straight up dead, from the second Shamura brought them through. Their souls were just never put to rest so that Narinder could have some company – if only according to Shamura. Narinder kept the two around mostly out of bewilderment, because honestly, who are these kittens, and what is Shamura’s game here, anyway??? They never even explained anything, they just tossed these kittens into the Afterlife and LEFT!!! At any rate, Aym and Baal being dead is how I explain why their souls apparently become lost in the void if they’re killed, along with the added complications required to revive the two because of it.
So, with those deets in mind, and given a bit of time, if Narinder hadn’t chosen to revive the Lamb, and also hadn’t chosen to put their soul to rest, they still would have woken up at some point, despite being as straight up dead as Aym and Baal. Who, don’t worry, were also properly revived while Narinder was waiting for the Lamb to wake up. Because I am also firmly of the belief that, first, the dead cannot leave the Afterlife without the use of a ritual/relic (and can't stay in the living world for long regardless), and second, dead followers’ devotion isn’t anywhere near as potent as that of the living, given how much more the living stand to lose.
Final ramble, regarding the Lamb’s feelings towards Narinder, and why they’re so devoted to him…
Well, you don’t spend most of your life on the run with your steadily-dwindling herd, trying to evade the ongoing genocide of your species, without becoming a little fucked up in the head. Maybe a lot fucked up in the head. Life is suffering, so might as well have fun with it, right? Maybe start finding death and pain to be kind of hilarious, even a little bit hot, once everyone you know and love is dead and gone, leaving you all alone? And maybe after that, there’s something comforting in how, despite the cold, cruel uncertainties of life, at least you can always count on the inevitability of death, patiently waiting for you until your very last breath? Who knows. Either way, as soon as the Lamb was killed, and they learned that the literal God of Death was offering them a second chance at life and vengeance via effective immortality, they were 100% ride-or-die-devoted all at once. Turns out death is kinder than life – go figure. (Of course, it helps that Narinder is 100% their type.)
They weren’t put off by Narinder’s thinly-veiled sadism or manipulations, either – they’re not too different in those regards, albeit opting for vastly different methods. It’s a very ‘two sides of the same coin’ sort of deal. In order to stay alive once they were made the last of their kind, the Lamb had no qualms with using others to their advantage, and that did not change once they were revived and expected to run a cult. They didn’t care for the position of authority, though – being a sheep and all, they’re much more of a follower than a leader, and thus greatly appreciated Narinder’s need for control. With how they had to keep on their toes for so long, the Lamb was also pretty good at reading people by the time they died, so they could recognize that a lot of Narinder’s posturing was just that – posturing. Dude’s 95% bluster and only 5% bite. He could obviously be vicious when he wanted or needed to (the Bishops' injuries were clear proof of that), but underneath his outer layer of cruelty was a generous layer of tsundere, and underneath all THAT was a soft squishy middle sibling velcro cat in desperate need of attention and affection.
(Which, for the record, he Did Not feel comfortable getting from Aym and Baal – Narinder still has no idea why the fuck Shamura sent them to him, beyond acting as keepers at best or trying to sabotage his attempts to escape at worst. Which, he thought HE sabotaged in turn, by guiding the kittens into being his devoted disciples instead. He thought he was very clever for it. ‘I outsmarted Shamura!’ he thought, despite that there was never anything there to outsmart. ‘What do you mean, Shamura sent your kittens to me for company?’ he demands of Forneus later. It may or may not lead him to pull Shamura out of Purgatory just so he can shake them and scream about how they should have Fucking Explained that!!!)
But, getting back on track as to why the Lamb was so willing to be sacrificed, I cannot stress this enough – if you pay even a minimal amount of attention to what he’s saying, Narinder is REALLY NOT SUBTLE about his intentions. ‘Death is of little consequence.’ ‘Followers are for you to use to your advantage.’ ‘Sacrifice a follower to absorb more power.’ So, yeah, the Lamb knew exactly what would be expected of them once the other Bishops were dead. They knew Narinder would expect them to die for him one last time. But, after all, death is of little consequence (not to mention hot), so when the time came, they wanted to see him freed, even if it meant oblivion for them in the end.
He’d given them a second life, and the ability to avenge their kin, and they felt indebted to him for that – so, while they were still pretty glum about the possibility that they might not get to see him free of his chains, nothing beyond their devotion and debt to him mattered. They never wanted all the drama and expectations that came with the Red Crown’s power, anyway, so, better for Narinder to have it back so that he could deal with it. What he did with the Lamb afterward would be up to him, and seeing as he was their god, they’d accept his decision gladly.
Were they in love with him by that point? Oh, obsessively so, but only in the devotional sense – romance was nowhere on their mind nor radar. That is, until he unexpectedly revived them again, told them he still needed them, and then offered down his hand to help them up.
The Lamb fell HARD for him in that moment. :3c
And now, a tiny shitten ramble. Lu and Li are twins, because sheep tend to have those a lot, and are conceived not long after the Lamb and Narinder’s marriage ceremony. Lu is the minutes older one, but Li is much more mature. I have put no further thought into these two, other than that they are utter menaces, birthed by the Lamb, cling hard to both their parents but especially Narinder (who spoils them rotten), and they are both genderfluid, using whichever pronouns/names they feel like at any given time. They are also both intersex, same as the Lamb, who was initially infertile up until Something Something Vague Magic, which I have also put no further thought into ¯\_(シ)_/¯
oh, and before anyone tries to suggest i headcanon this AU’s lamb as trending more female due to them giving birth or whatever, no, no, a thousand times no, they might have a vag, but they've also got a dick, and even if it's not as big as they'd like, they still know how to use it
Finally, the very tentative name for the Lamb in this AU is Yazdi, which is really just another name for the Baluchi breed of sheep XD (Not that the Lamb is this specific breed, I just didn’t like any of the other sheep-related names I found, ahaha...)
THAT’S ALL FOR NOW (collapses into an exhausted pile of goopy limbs)
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DPXDC prompt. Dead on main. Someone who knows you better than you know yourself.
Perhaps Fentons are not able to recognize their child, despite the fact that they hunt him day after day. But for childhood friends, who saw each other in absolutely ridiculous situations that parents are never allowed to know about, just one sneeze and a bored sigh is enough to realize that this weirdo fighting next to him is the same guy with whom you tasted soap and then stood looking at each other from different corners and giggling.
And so, the dialogue after the battle with the creatures of Infinite Realms, to which Constantine had to invite a potential ally not yet approved by the League:
Phantom: Well, mom always said you were bad news...But a crime lord, seriously? What happened to your plans to become a literature teacher? Red Hood: Hey! For Gotham, this is a very high-paying in-demand job. And I don't want to hear anything from Casper. At least I have my own business. What kind of part-time job do you have? Are you selling sheets to your buddies from this green goo? Phantom: This is ectoplasm. And they're not my friends, and anyway… Constantine: King Phantom, do you know Red Hood? Phantom: Do I know him? Ha! This street rat was Splinter of my beginnings until my family moved out of Gotham.
Red Hood: Wait, wait a minute. Phah...Holy shit. I thought I was the best example of what it means to be a disappointment to a family, but you beat me here. Oh, man, only you...The ghost king who is the son of the ghost hunters? Seriously? Hahah! I thought your rebellious phase ended the moment you told your father that you wanted to be an astronaut and not inherit the family business.
Danny*groans and covers his face with his hands*: My life is over.
Red Hood: Literally~ No, of course I always knew that your parents' disregard for safety in the laboratory would someday kill someone, but I didn't really expect this? Like, wow… Phantom: What makes you think it was an incident in the lab? I mean, there are so many possibilities around. It's ridiculous and…hah Red Hood: Dude, look me straight in the face and tell me I'm wrong if you dare. Phantom:…Fuck you, stupid bookworm. Red Hood: Stubborn nerd. Phantom: Red bucket! Red Hood: Pale toadstool! Nightwing: Um, can you guys please stop fighting? Red Hood: What are you talking about? This is how we always communicate. Phantom: Yeah! Well, in our defense, my sister always thought we both could use a therapist. Oh, man, he made me lose my train of thought. Where were we, J? Red Hood: Since when are you able to think? And I complimented your new hair and skin color. Phantom: Right, right… But, hey, not all of my parents' hypotheses really have a right to exist, and you know it! Hm, did I mention that you're built like a fridge and how does this leather jacket suit you? Red Hood: I believe not. And who's talking about your parents' work? You were an airhead when you were alive too to be honest. And as I see it, not much has changed. Why the hell are you still starting a fight with puns? Stop telling your opponent your position. This is terribly stupid! Phantom: Oh, please, these ghosts are definitely not a threat to me. What's wrong with having a little fun? The fact that you don't have weapons to handle something stronger than a blob ghost is your problem not mine, loser. But let's get back to our greetings. Red Hood: Sure. Then listen here…
~~~~~
Nightwing: Jay, why didn't you say right away that you knew Phantom? We've wasted so much time wondering if it's worth summoning him, and you just stood there and said nothing. Red Hood: Pfff…Because I didn't know that until today. He used to be human. And we haven't seen each other for a long time. So how was I to know that he would take such a ridiculous pseudonym? Nightwing: Then why the hell didn't you feel worried about teasing this creature? Red Hood: Why should I? It's just Danny.
~~~~
Tucker: Oh man, 84 murders, attempts to kill Joker and to much fights with Batman and Black Mask and… Danny: Yeah, yeah. It's all very interesting, but it's not what I asked you to find. Get to the point, Tucker. What I will wear to our dinner tonight depends on this. Tucker: Seriously? As far as I'm concerned, whether he's single or not is less important than all this shit. Aren't you afraid to show up at his house? Danny: I'm invited. And for that matter, I'm Amity Park's former public enemy number one. Which one of us should be worried, hah? So he's not dating anyone, right? Don't try to distract me. Tucker: Dude! Danny: Ugh, in my experience, when he acts like he's lost his mind, he usually has good reasons for it. And if not, given some of the events of my alternative future, I have no right to judge him, so…
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neonacidtrip · 2 years
Text
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#.#not me angry crying at 12.30 am no sir could not be me#im so annoyed#i made it very far through this terrible cursed day of the year#spent the last several hours in isolation skipped dinner#and i have to persevere through this headache because i have been waiting on someone to get back to me on something#theyre several hours late on the call and when it finally happens its less than 15 minutes and essentially covered nothing important#i got out of bed for this#on the worst day of the year#i would like to be put into a coma now please 12 years would be good#12 years and one month so that i dont wake up in bloody march#today may have been the worst day of the year but the rest of march still sucks too and im not looking forward to it#im honestly not even crying its just that frustrated 'i almost started crying but immediately lost the sensation' kind of hell#like a lost sneeze#i cant even go to bed now between this headache and the fact that i put off chores to take this call so now i have chores to finish#gosh i hate ranting on tumblr it just reminds me of why i left tumblr the first time around#but i have literally no person on this earth i can rant to anymore and i get reported whenever i rant on facebook#which is the biggest joke ever by the way how dare i be sad on the boomer website clearly i must be reported#its not even like a useful kind of reported all that happens is i get an annoying 'people are worried about you have you tried therapy#kind of message that doesnt tell me who the alleged worried people are#times like this i feel like i should put in more effort to make friends but ive grown so use to this sense of never venting to real people#that im pretty sure i could make 100 friends and id still never vent to them#especially since in all of my most recent friend groups the people liked to vent to me but never let me vent to them#id get therapy if i werent in america but i am so vague posting on tumblr is unfortunately all i have left to turn to#i just want march to be over and for all this stress to finally go away#i want to have something constant in my life again so im not continuously trapped in this hell of other people making my life choices#i especially want she who will not be named to stay as far away from me and my life choices as possible but that is a wholeee separate rant#maybe if i read something sad and go cry in the shower ill calm down#neo rambles#neo rants
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screeching-bunny · 1 year
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I'm intrigued by the idea of yandere priest harem.
Just a bunch of sexually repressed men that now have a tangible person to 'worship'.
Yandere! Priest Harem
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Warnings: Obsessive Behavior, Yandere Thoughts, Bad Writing, Stalking, Possessive Behavior, Reader is Referred as ‘You’
Tags: @endism
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What the fuck. You can’t believe it but you accidentally started a cult. You weren't sure how but you managed to do it. Everything about it was planned perfectly for you. From the moment you were kidnapped to the moment where you gave in, there was always some sort of routine that the priest followed that seemed almost robotic. Every word or phrase spoken to you seemed somewhat rehearsed as if they were doing everything in their power to make you pleased and happy. Everything that you requested or asked for was quickly met. Did you just say that you were hungry? Don’t worry, wait a couple more minutes and a feast will be made just for you. Did something catch your eye while you were shopping? In a couple minutes it is purchased and given to you. Never in your life had you seen a group more downbad people then these priests. They are incredibly whipped for you and treat you as if you were some kind of God.
Although you were kidnapped you soon learned to just accept the role as their false God. Why? Well to simply put you were just plain lazy and if being kidnapped allowed you to live a luxurious life without needing to work then so be it. Screw having a job and screw having to pay for bills. You will accept this position with grace and take advantage of it however you would like. The only thing that bothered you was why the hell were people joining this stupid cult!?!? By now you expected the stupid priests to run out of money by now due to your spending habits but why on Earth are people still continuing to donate to them!?!? There just always seems to be a never ending supply of money!!!
“Did you see them? The God of this religion is such a cutie. Do you think I have a shot at becoming a priest? Hell, I wouldn’t even mind being a sacrifice to them.” (Go away).
“I just donated my entire retirement fund to them. It’s so worth it. Did you see how cute their sneezes are? I could literally just die!!!” (Then die).
“I shook their hand a few days ago with my right hand. I haven’t washed it since.” (Gross).
Dammit that's why. You're so called “followers” were nothing but a group of some weirdo simps. The only thing that you ever did around this place was give speeches to your cult that came right out of your ass and they would eat it up everytime too. It is so bad that you could literally say that the Earth was flat and they would go to war to defend that you were right. You’ve never seen a group of more stupider people. As of right now you were currently giving out one of those bullshit speeches to your followers.
“... which is why cats are superior over dogs. If you have a cat tell them I said pspspspsp.”
One of the priests raises their hand, “Can you repeat that whole thing again? That was super cute and I forgot to press record.”
Another priest responds with, “Don’t worry I caught it all and I’ll send it to you later. In exchange, can I have that limited edition picture of them sleeping with a teddy bear.”
Another voice shouts, “Wait! I have some never seen before photos of them. Are you willing to trade it for the limited edition picture?”
“...”
Later that night you soon discover that there is a “trading card game” going around the cult using your pictures. You weren’t even sure how they even managed to take these photos but they somehow have them and how were these mass produced without you even noticing!?!? Why are they out of stock and why are they so popular!?!? Everyday is a never ending migraine for you. Just when you thought the priests couldn’t disappoint you even further, they always manage to prove you wrong. If they weren’t the ones feeding you, you would have been long gone by now.
Waking up always felt like a struggle most of the time. Like it literally was a struggle because there was always someone in your bed with you. They would constantly cuddle up to you as close as possible and make it difficult to leave the bed with their weight holding you down. By the time you wake up breakfast is already made and there is someone constantly fighting to decide who gets to feed you. After breakfast, you stroll around the gigantic garden that was funded with the money of taxpayers. Afternoons are spent giving out wack speeches and talking to your loyal followers. Dinners are the same as breakfast and there is competition on who gets to bathe with you. Quite often these end up turning physical fights between everyone. During the night you're out like a light and it’s a repeat of everything the next day.
Every passing day makes you so concerned for the mental health of others. There is just no way that any of these people are mentally sane. They have to be on drugs or something. You refused to believe that these were rational adults that are contributing members of society. No matter how much you try to change your personality, they always find a way to coo at you. On the days that you act like a brat you are met with the responses of, “Oh my god look at them pout that's so adorable!! Now step on me–”. On the days you act lazy it’s met with, “You don’t have to move I’ll do it all for you! Just let me lick your–”. Are you acting happy today? Well that's met with, “Your smile is so radiant! You know what would make your day better if you let me suck–”. In the end though it really doesn’t matter because their main goal in life is to forever worship your being whether you like it or not.
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pupgawa · 7 months
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Hybrid - girls ! ! ♡︎
୨❤︎︎୧ contents: what kind of animal girl the bsd men like ( fem ! Reader my darlings ) ❤︎︎
୨❤︎︎୧ pairings: dazai/reader , chuuya/reader, akutagawa/reader, and atsushi/reader
୨❤︎︎୧ tags / warnings: smut of course, praise, brat taming, mating press, cream pie, vibrators
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Dazai Osamu
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★ … Dazai likes : lamb girls ! ❤︎︎
he loves all women as he says ! But the, soft , sweet , love-able are all traits of the lamb girl experience that Dazai absolutely adores. he loves to put his head on your lap and take a small snooze after a long day of work. Your gentle demeanor makes you absolutely irresistible, he’s like a big bad wolf taking a soft sweet little lamb all for himself ❤︎︎
he loves to take you from behind, preferably in front of a mirror, he loves to watch your cute little tail wag and wiggle as he makes you cum for the 3rd time that night !
-❤︎︎-
Dazai takes a hold of your hips, dragging you back onto his cock, you already came twice already but he whispers a faux ‘ one more time ‘ into your ear and you’re already practically weak for him.
Large bandaged hand grips your hips tightly, leaving bruising indents on your soft flesh. He bucks his hips at a quick pace. Lewd , wet sounds fill up your shared apartment ( neither of you bothering to close the door properly ).
One hand leaves your hips, coming around to your front and tilting your head up, forcing you to look at the mirror at the foot of your bed. “ look at that, little lamb .. ” he hums in your ear. “ so pretty when you’re all fucked out like this ” he coos sweetly in your ear, placing a kiss to the side of your neck, which was already painted with purple and blue hickies that he oh so kindly decided to leave.
“ samu’ .. ” you babble out, unable to form a coherent sentence at this point, you were close, your walls clamp down around him. “ oh ? You’re gonna cum ? ” he asks, you nod your head in response, earning a chuckle from the brunette.
“ cum f’ me, pretty ” you didn’t need to be told twice, you let out a small squeak, it’s all you could muster out for now, cumming around his cock. Dazai slows his thrusts down, but not coming to a complete stop.
“ shit .. oh belladonna, I’m gonna cum- will you let me do it inside ? ” he whispers into your ear, you merely nod your head, not being able to speak. Dazai gives a couple more sloppy thrusts before stilling himself inside your cunt, spilling himself inside of you.
There’s a moment of silence, minus the soft panting of both you and Dazai. Dazai withdraws from your battered cunt with a lazy, satisfied smile on his face
“ see? I told you you could do it ”
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Chuuya Nakahara
★ … chuuya likes : fox girls !
as opposed to Dazai, chuuya takes a liking to your brash, assertive behavior, not many men do, but chuuya enjoys the extra challenge. Though you weren’t really a challenge outside of the bedroom, it’s the healthiest relationship either of you have ever been in, you guys treat each other like loyalty, and honestly, good for you guys !
Chuuya likes having you ride him, it’s fun seeing you get desperate for his cock when you were just bratting off to him earlier.
- ❤︎︎ -
“ come on, baby, you can do it ” chuuya’s words are nothing but a mock as he watches you bounce on his lap, leaning against the headboard, You see you would have gotten help if you weren’t such a damn brat earlier.
Your long fox ears flick in annoyance, you place your hands on his thighs and continue to bounce on his stiff dick. You decided to wave your tail right in front of his face, you know he hated when you did this, it made him sneeze every time, and he’ll be damned if he sneezes in the middle of fucking you. He grabs your tail at the base, making you arch your back with a loud moan, walls clamping down around his cock.
“ you little minx ” he snarls under his breath, “ you did that on purpose didn’t you ? ” damn you foxes and your clever brains. You look back at him and stick out your tongue. “ fine, you asked for it ”
Before you could respond, his hands are stationed behind his back, completely stilling his hips. “ since you think you’re sooo smart, find away to get yourself off, then ” okay that was not how you planning that to go. There’s a whine from the back of your throat, but either way, you started moving your hips again.
It didn’t take long before you set a nice and steady rhythm, desperately fucking yourself on his cock, slowly dragging his shaft out of yourself before inserting it back in, his cockhead kissing your cervix with a loud moan. Chuuya watches from beneath you, your cunt stretching around his cock as you connect your hips with his.
“ p .. please ” you plead, desperately bucking your hips
“ I dunno, you’ve been pretty bratty, bad girls don’t get help ” chuuya teases.
“ please ! M’ sorry ! Just help me- ” you sobbed, hips faltering as you desperately bounced on him, itching to cum.
Chuuya thinks for a minute before letting out a small chuckle. “ alright, c’mere ”
Chuuya purrs, grabbing a hold of your hips and thrusting upwards, pulling you back down on to his cock, you arched your back and let out a loud moan.
Chuuya groans loudly, hands tightening on your hips so hard they might bruise, thrusting up once or twice before he slips out and shoots ropes of cum directly onto your tummy.
You whine softly “ I didn’t get to cum.. ”
“ shouldn’t have been a brat, then ” he snips back with a small huff.
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Ryuunosuke Akutagawa
★ … Akutagawa likes: puppy girls !
akutagawa likes the loyalty and the eagerness to please that comes with puppy girls it’s the little things like going out to retrieve things for him, remind him of meetings and important dates that he has, taking his coat after work, things like that make his normally cold heart flutter.
- ❤︎︎ -
The soft sound of a vibrator fills the living room, you whimper softly as you grind up against his leg, pussy gushing all over his pants, he tuts softly, Rashomon getting tighter around your body making you moan softly
“ you’re getting my pants all wet, bad girl ”
“ sorry, ryuu, I’m sorry, just feel so good ”
You whimper pathetically, sucking in air through your teeth, you tail wagging furiously, trying to buck your hips again, but Akutagawa’s ability was holding you still, not allowing to move. You whine loudly, but you know better than to disobey.
Akutagawa smirks seeing your obedience, he presses down on the button of the vibrator, turning the intensity of the vibrator up, making you toss your head back with a loud moan. Your tail stands up on edge, ears twitching, your eyes become dewy with tears soon enough, you came twice already on the vibrator.
“ r … ryuu- ”
You start whining, attempting to buck your hips, but roshomon is holding you tightly, preventing you from doing so.
“ stay still, if you want any chance of cumming tonight you’ll do so on the vibrator, understood? ”
You still your hips, following his orders, you couldn’t hear what he said next by the sound of your own moans and the intense vibrating sounds, you’ve been at this for hours, and your orgasm was so close, you tremble in the old of your boyfriend’s ability, voice getting higher in pitch.
And finally, you finally reached your climax after hours or endless torture, you let out a loud moan of pleasure, cumming around the vibrator, Akutagawa turns it off, another black tendril coming from his coat and taking the vibrator of you.
“ good girl ”
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Atsushi Nakajima
★… atsushi likes: bunny girls !
he can’t help it, it’s his tiger instinct that draws him to be more attracted so the gentle, soft, and cleverness of the bunny girl experience. It also makes for some great sex, after a particularly hard day of work, he comes home and rails you into the bed
- ❤︎︎ -
Atsushi has you pinned aghast the bed, legs lifted up, pressed against your chest, locking you into a tight mating press, unable to move, let alone escape, but it’s not like you want to when he’s drilling into you this good.
“ f … fuck- ” he moans out, his hips slamming into yours, pounding you till kingdom come, the sounds of your moans only spurs him on, he’s come inside of you twice already and he’s far from done. He just can’t get enough of the way your gummy walls feel around him, sucking him in, it’s like you don’t want him to stop.
“ one more … one more, sweetheart, I promise, just one more ” he said that an hour ago, but he sounds so desperate you don’t bother to say no, you can’t say no to that cute face of his.
“ a .. alright, ‘jima, one more ” you manage to get out, Atsushi moans happily and continues to fuck you, his thrusts get sloppy, signaling that he was close to orgasm again. He bites down onto your already marked up neck, splotches of purple painted your skin, he leaves another dark hickey on your neck, kissing it after he was done.
“ c .. cumming- shit, cumming! I’m gonna- ooohh !! ♡︎ ”
He moans out, stilling himself deep inside of you, cockhead kissing your cervix, he spills himself balls deep inside of you, he moans out in satisfaction and pulls out his still erected member, watching his cum spill out of you.
“ one more round ? ” he asks, you chuckle softly in exhaustion
“ sure, one more around ”
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ellecdc · 6 months
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can i request a reader x poly!marauders where the reader finds a stray kitten and she hides in her robes so she can feed it in morning and just carries it around school.
it’s the boys vs a kitten for reader’s attention, especially sirius sometimes he’s talking smack to the kitten who’s a asleep and then reader catches him and scolds him for it
loolllll poor Siri. Thanks for your request!
Sirius' Arch Nemesis
poly!marauders x fem!reader
CW: brief mention of Sirius' crappy childhood but very brief and it's only for dramatic effect (it's from Sirius' POV, obviously)
Some may deem this dramatic, but Sirius was very sure that this was quite possibly one of the worst things to have ever happened to him.
“Now, that’s a little dramatic, Pads.” Peter chided, watching you coo at a little bundle hidden beneath your robes as you fed it pieces of chicken at dinner.
“She used to feed me chicken like that.” Sirius pouted, causing Remus to snort.
“She’s never once fed you like that, Pads.”
“Awe, poor Siri.” James cooed, sounding awfully sympathetic to his musings; at least Sirius had one ally here. “Would you like me to feed you chicken like that?”
Sirius gave James his best kicked puppy impression (which was very easy seeing as he was a giant puppy and had spent his entire life training for it) and nodded. “Yes please, Jamie.”
James cooed again and pressed a kiss to Sirius’ cheek before dutifully stabbing a piece of chicken and bringing it to Sirius’ mouth.
“Merlin you guys are embarrassing.” Remus muttered as he turned back to watch you dote over the runty little kitten that you’d found in Hogsmeade last weekend all on its lonesome. 
“You should leave it here, dovey. His mama may be looking for him.” Remus tried, though he couldn’t deny that the kitten did look particularly pathetic. The tiny thing was shaking, crying, and looked sort of wet or dirty - Remus may not know much but he was quite certain no kitty mama would let their little one walk around in such a state.
Remus nearly whimpered when you turned your face up to the three boys standing over you with tears in your eyes, your face overflowing with empathy. “Can we wait here then? To see if the mama comes back for him?”
Remus ignored the petulant whining’s from Sirius as he sat himself down beside you in camaraderie with nothing more than a sigh. How could he say no to such a reasonable albeit emotional request?
“Jamie?” You murmured, and Remus wasn’t sure how much of the pout was honest and how much of it was to gain sympathy for your cause, but James was quickly at your side.
“Yes, angel?”
“Do you think you could ask Madame Rosmerta for some water? Maybe tuna if she has some?”
James looked like he really didn’t want to do that but also felt he was in no position to deny you.
“Sure thing, sweetheart.” He conceded, pressing a kiss to your hair and causing Sirius to grumble.
“Why don’t you come with me, Pads? Once we bring it back we can head to Zonko's whist these two wait.” James offered, causing Sirius to brighten up considerably.
Needless to say, the mama cat never did show up and the kitten let out a number of pathetic little sneezes from its curled-up place in your lap.
“It’s getting dark, dove. Curfew is soon.” Remus reminded you gently.
“I can’t leave it here, Rem.” You moaned, still never raising your eyes from the kitten as it kneaded biscuits into your robes.
And Remus really hated to admit it, but he didn’t think you could leave it here either.
So, thanks to your bleeding heart and Remus’ lack of self-restraint when it came to anything you ever wanted, Sirius was effectively being replaced by a tiny little devil.
“I don’t know why you’re so wound up about this Black.” Marlene taunted from her place in her girlfriend’s lap as said girlfriend massaged her scalp on the couch of the Gryffindor common room. “It’s just a tiny kitten.”
“'Just a tiny kitten'.” Sirius sneered back at his best friend. “Right, so tell me, Miss. ‘My-Girlfriend-Is-Currently-Snuggling-And-Petting-Me-Right-At-This-Very-Moment’, what do you see my girlfriend doing right now?”
Marlene barely maneuvered her head from Dorcas’ lap to see you curled up near the fire with a book in your hand and that stupid kitten in your lap. 
“She’s reading to her cat?” Dorcas responded bemusedly, clearly not seeing what the big deal is.
“Exactly!” Sirius huffed. “That should be me.”
“Oh, my gods.” Marlene grumbled as she stood from her place, grabbing Dorcas’ hand to pull her up too. “Can we go snuggle in the snake pit? I can’t handle Sirius’ level of dramatics tonight.”
“Some friend you are!” Sirius shouted at Marlene’s retreating form as the portrait hole closed behind them.
James and Remus were currently at a prefect’s meeting with James being head-boy and Remus as (the head-boy’s favourite) prefect. 
Usually, you and Sirius would spend this time together just the two of you, which was hard to come by sometimes in such a relationship as yours. One-time you guys went and used the bath in the prefect’s bathroom knowing that all the prefects would be busy for the next hour and having gained the password from your boyfriends’. Another time, you two fashioned your own prank without the help of the other Marauder’s and even got away with it!
But right now, Sirius just wanted to cuddle.
But that was fine! If it was animals you wanted to cuddle with, Sirius was more than happy to oblige.
With a quick glance to ensure that the common room was empty, Sirius quickly shifted into Padfoot and made his way over to you.
Padfoot was feeling pretty confident in his plan, that is until he heard a nasty little sound emanating from your lap.
“Sirius!” You scolded, picking up the now very spiky and angry looking kitten from your lap. “You’re scaring him, Pads!�� You cooed, tucking the kitten into the collar of your jumper.
The portrait hole opened at this and James and Remus entered the room hand-in-hand, laughing about something before turning to take in the scene.
“Uh oh...” James started, making his way over to the two three of you currently sitting near the fire. “Did Padfoot try to eat the kitten?”
Padfoot harumphed the best he could in his current doggy form. Is good dog, he thought, would not eat...only maim.
“The kitten is frightened.” You pouted, looking to James for sympathy. James looked like he was considering giving it to you, but Remus spoke up as he scratched placatingly behind Padfoot’s ears.
“Perhaps you should bring him upstairs, dovey. Give him some quiet time.”
You readily agreed, much to Padfoot’s chagrin, and left the common room. Now you’d be all the way up there and he’d definitely not get any cuddles.
“Okay, is anyone else sort of jealous of the cat?” James finally muttered plainly once he knew you were out of ear shot.
Yes, Padfoot thought as he quickly shifted back to Sirius. “Yes! It’s like she’s replacing us!”
Remus scoffed at that. “No one is being replaced, boys. Just relax.”
Sirius levelled his boyfriend with a glare. “Yeah? When’s the last time she read to you by the fire, Moons?”
Remus paused and seemed to think on that for a moment before his eyes darted back to Sirius. “I still think you’re being dramatic.”
“It’s been since the kitten, hasn’t it Remus?” Sirius argued, not willing to let it go.
“Sirius, she’s allowed to love things other than us.”
Both Sirius and James scoffed at that. “I think bloody not!” James retorted. 
“I can concede if she likes other things, but she cannot love anything more than me! She needs to love me the most!” Sirius insisted, causing both of his boyfriends to look at him funny.
“Oh?” James asked with a bemused frown.
“Is that how it is, really? You think she loves you the most out of all of us?” Remus continued.
Sirius levelled them with a look he hoped portrayed a “yeah, duh”. 
“Is that how this relationship works for you Sirius? Which of us do you love the most?” James demanded, crossing his arms in that way Sirius loves because it makes his muscles bulge. 
“Me, obviously.” He answered simply.
“You’re your own favourite?” Remus deadpanned.
Sirius shrugged. “Yeah, I’m awesome.”
“You’re not supposed to have favourites!” James whined.
“You’re telling me you’ve never been like ‘oh merlin, right now Moony is my favourite’?” Sirius asked him.
James scoffed indignantly. “Right now, he very well might be!”
Instead of having the effect he hoped that comment would on Sirius, Sirius nodded in agreement. “See? Favourites.”
“You’re an idiot.” Remus grumbled as he stood and made his way upstairs.
“Do you really have favourites?” James asked quietly once Remus had left, his voice giving way to a vulnerability that made Sirius melt.
“Not a chance, bubs.” Sirius insisted, placing a kiss to James’ temple as he pulled the spectacled boy into his side. “I just like arguing with Moony; he makes it so easy to take the piss.”
James chuckled and allowed some tension to leave his body. 
“No, but seriously, what are we going to do about that kitten?” James piped up and pulled away so he could look into Sirius’ face.
“I suppose my current plan of feeding it to the Hippogriffs is a no?” Sirius asked. He was answered by an unamused glare from James.
“Fine. Fine. Hopefully the novelty will wear off soon.” Sirius conceded. For as much shit as he gave you, he did sort of love how much you loved anything and everything that might be in need of some; himself included.
James and Sirius watched the flames dance in the fireplace for some time, just enjoying the quiet company that the two of them very rarely shared together.
“Why don't we go see what those two are up to, hm?” James asked eventually, helping Sirius up from his position on the floor and heading up the stairs towards the boy's dorm.
The room was quiet as they entered and when Sirius turned after closing the door to survey the room, he let out a horrified gasp.
“How in the buggering hell did he manage that!?” He whisper shouted, pointing to Remus laying on his bed with you pulled into his side, nuzzled into the crook of his arm.
As James moved to survey the two of you from another side, his face morphed into a pained grimace. “Pads, maybe it’s best we-”
But it was too late, Sirius had seen all he needed to see.
“You bloody traitor!” He nearly shrieked, albeit not loud enough to stir you nor the stupid fucking kitten currently curled up in a very content ball on Remus’ chest from your respective slumber’s.
If Remus had been pretending to sleep, his ruse was given away by a smug smirk gracing his face.
“Better luck next time, Sirius.” He goaded, rubbing a soothing hand up and down your arm as you burrowed further into the werewolf’s side. 
Sirius had been beaten, crucio’d, starved, disowned and homeless in his eighteen years of life. But this right here was without a doubt the worst thing to have ever happened to him.
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pomefioredove · 5 days
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housewardens + Jamil and Floyd with a reader that plays volleyball please
I think of reader as yuu, but it's not needed to be specified, and NRC doesn't really have volleyball as one of the sports that I know of. so whether it's not a thing in their world or just not at their school, I think it'd be cool to see how the characters react to the reader playing during gym, free time, or for some outside of school club or whatever. it'd be amazing if reader could be a libero, because that's my position, but it doesn't have to be specified
but like, js imagine reader is yuu and so they taught one of the students how to play bc it's not at NRC amd now they play literally whenever they can
I don't know anything about volleyball but I tried 🫡🫡
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ volleyball player reader
type of post: headcanons characters: riddle, leona, azul, floyd, jamil, kalim, vil, idia, malleus additional info: romantic or platonic reader is gender neutral, reader is yuu
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am I crazy to think that Riddle would be into it? seeing as he's somewhat of an athlete himself (equestrian club), he knows the sort of discipline and dedication it takes to truly master a sport
he'll offer to help you organize an ~official~ club, but you don't seem too bothered about it. he finds it endearing that you can wake up in an entirely different world, almost die every other month, and still have the motivation to pursue what you love, anyway
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
you'd better be careful around Leona, or you'll end up at morning Spelldrive practice in his place (hehe)
so, you don't have any magic. and? you know how to throw and catch, and that's good enough for him. hell, you're better than most of the magical first years. plus, you're motivated, you're responsible, and Leona Savanaclaw could use someone like you around
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
when Azul sent the tweels to dig up some dirt on you, he wasn't expecting this. like, okay, he underestimated you. he was hoping for something more... exploitable. if only he had a use for volleyball...
oh, well. you're still worth watching, currently useful or not. athletic skill is nothing to sneeze at, especially from a native land-dweller. he might need those legs of yours someday, you know
...wait, that came out wrong
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
no one really bothers looking for Floyd when he doesn't show up to basketball club. not because they don't care, but because it's not worth the time. if he really doesn't want to be found, you just won't find him
of course, the one day Jamil has to leave club early, he walks in on the two of you in the courtyard, playing volleyball
all this time, Floyd had been skipping club to watch you play another ball game just a few minutes away. he's absolutely captivated, too. like a cat with a laser pointer
as unamused as he is, Jamil knows it's absolutely useless to lecture him, so he just... sits and watches you play, too
and, well... he gets it. you're an interesting person, you know?
after that, he figures you may as well join the basketball club
...if only to give you a better place to practice, and to keep Floyd indoors
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
bro if you asked, Kalim would have an entire court built for you. actually, you wouldn't even have to ask. just one mention about how NRC has no volleyball club, and he'd have a team just for you by noon
if you refuse, he's still supportive. and really, really fascinated. he's not as much of an athlete as you or Jamil, which just makes it all the more impressive to him. he'll ask you to explain the game and your position over and over again, even while watching you play
he also just likes hearing your voice, so :)
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if there's anything Vil can admire, it's dedication. another thing? passion. being an athlete, or, really, having any serious hobby, demands both of those things
here's the thing; he could already tell. he didn't have to stumble across you during practice (as if he would stumble at all smh). your form, the way you carry yourself, even parts of your personality were context enough
and while he may not say it, he holds a high opinion of you. you can legit get out of VDC training by just saying you're going to practice
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
you may think that Idia isn't going to go for the jock type, but, actually, one of his favorite animes is about volleyball and-
yeah, yeah. you get it. he's smitten
if he ever gets over his crushing fear of talking to you, you'll never get him to shut up. seriously. he already knows everything there is to know about the game, but that doesn't mean he's not going to ask you to explain everything all over again (he's totally fangirling over this). and sevens forbid you give him a demonstration...
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there's probably not volleyball in Briar Valley. right. I just can't picture that. so the first time Malleus observes you in practice, he's amazed, fascinated even. and he has a lot of questions. good ones!
you could probably convince him to play with you, which would be, uh. interesting? actually he's weirdly an amazing player
you could get all of Diasomnia to form a team, somehow. like I know they'd be abnormally good at it
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