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#while very obviously not fine
hailsatanacab · 1 year
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oof owie hello it’s chapter 17!
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thatswhatsushesaid · 3 months
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psa that the day there are no jgy stans left on tumblr dot com is the day i am dead
but rest assured i'll go to my grave exactly as i lived: obnoxiously proclaiming to everyone within earshot how great lianfang-zun is. narratively, metaphorically, spiritually. sexually, too, like why limit myself. i like to keep my options open
#the spirit of su minshan possessed me for a minute there but like. i'm fine with it#jin guangyao#he did crimes??? good for him 😌#editing this post to add that while the tone here is clearly joking#i really am fundamentally still engaged with this fandom#and with this book#almost exlcusively because of my enjoyment of jgy#even xiyao is secondary for me like i love it and i'm ride or die for it obvs#but jgy as a character is the main draw for me. and he would have me by the throat even if there was no zewu-jun#(tho i think jgy's life would be more depressing for his absence obviously)#but he is just. /clenches my fists!!!#THE most compelling character in the story and i cannot stop thinking about him!! cannot will not!!#who else in this book has his range? who else can be the doe-eyed idealist AND the spy with blood on his hands who ends a war?#who else is two different greek tragedies and at least two separate shakespearean tragedies rolled into one antagonist#an antagonist who but for the POV of the novel could very easily have been the protagonist#whose moral event horizon is so deeply entwined with his own trauma and abuse that there is no way to meaningfully separate#the violence he does to others from the systemic violence that was done to him for his whole life?#who else in this book manages to get five separate sect leaders utterly obsessed with him no matter how you choose#to interpret that obsession?#no one!!! that's who!!#ain't no one else in the jianghu doing it like lianfang-zun and that's just a goddamn fact
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embras-grace · 7 months
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One thing I truly adore about Palia is the polyamory and general queerness. It's so nice that we can romance everyone so we don't miss any plots or items, but also its nice as a poly-queer person to see some representation in a game.
There is no jealousy. There is no hateful or painful breakups (as I understand it, if you break-up it is not mentioned and you restart the romance plot-line). No one makes negative comments about two pins or switching out pins.
It's so nice to see positive rep in a game and honestly such a breath of fresh air.
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front-facing-pokemon · 11 months
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tswwwit · 9 months
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What are some ideas you have floating around that you don't have any plans on writing but like to entertain as a thought?
Many of them, in fact! Though they sort of vanish from my memory if I don't make a record of them, here's a few ones I jotted down when they came to mind.
For a domestic one: Bill thought he'd hate a lot of being married! Even though he loves Dipper, he thought he'd rebel against the chains of domesticity - and in some ways he still does - but one major benefit he's found is not having to be 'on' all the time.
No need to be perfectly performing all the time! No shoving around for social influence, no intimidation, or clever tricks. No commanding attention or taking up the room. Hell, there's surprisingly little upkeep! Bill can undo his tie and pick his nose and bitch about his day to someone who isn't bending over backwards to agree with him on everything. Someone who doesn't give him a weird look and sneer if he, god forbid, actually wants to sit down, read a book, drop the grin for an hour or two.
The concept in question is Bill's very first moment of great surprise. That when he isn't being the most charming, terrifying, and exciting guy in the universe, and just chilling out for like, five minutes, Dipper comes over and snuggles up to him on the couch, or wraps his arms around his shoulders and kisses the top of his head. And when Bill asks 'what was that for?', Dipper shrugs and goes 'eh, just felt like it'. It's both baffling and extremely compelling.
A short where Reincarnated Dip is Definitely Sure he's Not Gay!!! Especially not for this Hot Demon Man who is getting so close and touchy with him with his big smile and horrible wiles. Yep. Just keeping an eye on him to make sure he's not up to something Nefarious ™.
A discussion between Dipper and Bill where Dipper insists that Bill should understand this, or not do that, because, like. Y'know, Bill's a guy! There are guy things! Making Bill stare at Dipper like he's an idiot. He proceeds to informs Dipper how that's stupid for multiple reasons! First, that Bill's Not Human to begin with, his gender can't be put into a little box! And frankly, he never filled out the paperwork for his original one, come to think of it. Sure, he/him's fine, but c'mon, sapling, thinking of the whole shebang like a binary is dumb as hell. Now Dipper has to do some mental readjustment re: his own issues with masculinity/gender.
#answers#None of this is very coherent I just saved this ask for a while and dumped some thoughts in#Though I do have like a whole scene in my head for the gender one#Probably it's Bill cajoling Dipper into wearing a dress for something. Which Dipper obviously rebels against.#Bill's very convincing but Dipper shoots back well. He's never seen *Bill* wear a dress. Thinking he's making a point#But Bill just gets the metaphorical equivalent of a lightbulb over his head. Hey! Good point kid it's been a while#Oh ho!!! I see! Pinching Dipper's cheek - you want us to *match!* Surprised to see any fashion sense outta you#Hold on a sec. Bill will whip up something in a jiffy. A real nice one#Now Dipper's spluttering. He thought it was a good counterargument but Bill didn't even *flinch* at the idea of wearing one himself#But like. C'mon Bill Guys Don't Wear Dresses!! You're a guy you shouldn't-#Bill stares at him like he's an idiot. DIpper shuts up. Dumb move actually now that he's thinking about it#Both because telling Bill he *shouldn't* do something absolutely means he's looking into doing it. If not already in the process#And second. Uh. Oh hell. Dipper remembers. That Bill's only wearing that body. Not human. Triangular so - Wait. Is he *not* a guy?? Uh.#Bill's perfectly fine with his human body and his pronouns. Even with the presumptions that his husband has made over the years#But Dipper having this idea that those mean Bill should STOP doing certain things annoys him a lot#Bill politely - for him anyway - reminds Dipper that he's very much *not* a guy. None of that crap applies!#As Dipper has seen! And hey the ideas Dipper's working with there are outdated even among *humans* what the hell#There's probably a mini-rant that's rather scathing but frankly that's Bill on easy mode for his husband#Dipper's well-intentioned and knows how things go but he struggles with masculinity especially regarding himself#Turns out being bullied and trying so hard to be Socially Acceptable means a lot of issues to unpack#Also re: the Domestic one#Dipper is present with Bill while he chills out for those five minutes. Just watching from across the room#Bill knows he's there. But he's not puffing up trying to be impressive. Not being dismissive. Just accepting. And now Dipper's *fascinated*#It's so rare to see Bill NOT 'on' that he couldn't help it. No big show. No big grin. Almost.... not 'vulnerable' he's terrifying always#But so so relatable. God does Dipper know the feeling of just wanting to find some peace and quiet after a hectic day. But for Bill. That's#Rare and strange and so - Dipper *knows* he's the Only Person who could ever ever see this. Being in Bill's presence for a full ten minutes#Without Bill flipping some internal switch to 'Impress or Intimidate'. This is Dipper's own little secret to watch and absorb and treasure#And. In a way. When Bill's not vibrating with potential energy for parties or violence he's even MORE handsome#He just HAS to kiss him. A little bit. On the cheek or on the top of the head. Maybe curl up next to him where it's warm and touch his ches#Bill spends hours afterward wondering where the hell that came from and WHY. And it'll take him *so much* time to figure it out
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vanhelsingapologist · 3 months
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Strahdposting (with possible spoilers so tread lightly)
One of the worst things about Strahd in our campaign is that he's not overtly forced anyone to do anything. His underlings have, sure, but never him. He just waits for us to eliminate our options all on our own, and then presents us with his way. And of course, his way is the easiest. He'll even make it easier. We keep falling into the pit because he ensures we dig it ourselves.
We're almost past the point where he wants to bargain with us and I'm nervous about what happens when he stops being the devil we know and becomes something else altogether.
The recent reveal that there were other parties before ours has been so shattering for us, I think, because it made us all realize that our party is an amusement until it is an inconvenience, and then we'll be insects in the garden that have overstayed our welcome. And then he'll start with the force.
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cringefaildiaz · 1 year
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I think my major issue with the finale (and s6 overall) is that Buck had SO much going on, 5 different thematically similar internal and external conflicts, and I don't feel like the show did nearly enough to weave them together or show the progress of them onscreen.
I have no idea why Buck was no longer scared to "pick the wrong couch again." I know why he was interested in Natalia specifically, but not the bigger emotional picture of how/why he got over this emotional hurdle.
I have no idea how he's changed since the lightning strike - they told us he has, but what's actually going on in his head? I have literally no idea.
I don’t know what kind of growth he experienced via the donor baby. I know he decided he could be donor-not-dad from the get go, stuck to that throughout the pregnancy, and then had a wistful moment gazing at his progeny. But that doesn't really feel like a big emotional moment when he's been saying it's not his kid for 8 months.
I know he started the season wanting more professional responsibility and ended it taking charge when the 118 was in danger, but I don't know what skills he acquired in the interim to allow him to do it successfully. I don't know how he feels about it. I don't even know if by the finale he still WANTED to lead. It was fine enough payoff, but it certainly wasn't an "Eddie suiting up in Mayday" kind of payoff.
I know his coma dream taught him Lessons but I don't know how they're reflected in his real life?
Compare how his arcs this season played out to Hen and med school, or Eddie and dating and I think you can see the massive deficiencies in Buck's season. And I'm totally aware that they need to leave things open so they have somewhere to go next season, but all of his (many, many) storylines having such a lack of emotional depth is a real bummer.
I think it would've been magnitudes better if he had really struggled on screen with the donation, so that moment of him handing the baby off to Kameron would've shown some real growth. A single conversation about him needing to not be scared to live because he DIED as an explanation for dating again. We sort of half-got a lot of these things - Buck telling everyone Kameron was pregnant and the onesie, Buck at the cemetery saying every day is a gift - but they didn't really commit to any of it, and they certainly didn't give themselves the time to flesh all of it out. All in all, for a very Buck heavy season, I don't feel like I know Buck any better, and I know he's made some steps forward, but only because they told us he did. I really would've liked to see the emotional journey to get there.
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elftwink · 6 months
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you guys know that "landlords are leeches get a real job" is a haha funny bit you say to illustrate the hypocrisy of the rhetoric surrounding work and what qualifies as 'contributing' to capitalist society and not a coherent leftist belief right? you guys are saying that because it's funny to watch landlords sputter to come up with a response to the kind of attitude they have always subjected tenants and renters to and not because you genuinely believe your worth is determined by the money you earn under capitalism, right? you understand that once you believe it is possible for someone (even landlords) to be a 'leech' on society if they arent working (or aren't working enough, or aren't doing the right kind of work, etc), this will bleed into the way you think of everyone else too, right? you guys know that legitimate and meaningful critiques of landlords are not and can never be based on whether or not they are working because that is irrelevant to the fact that they own property for the express purpose of charging other people for access to shelter, which is a basic human need and shouldnt be controlled by the whims of Some Guy just because its his name on the deed... right???
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wildwood-faun · 2 months
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feeling :( but I know it's because my back is acting up again
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ithinkdogshouldvote2 · 7 months
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Sparrow Oak-Garcia is the second best kiddad after Terry Jr. I'm so not sorry.
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luvsavos · 3 months
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i am once again apologizing for my lack of activity/responsiveness
my childhood cat passed away a few days ago which has just been more stuff on top of everything else for me to deal with to stress me out and upset me
i'll try to get back to stuff. Eventually. as soon as i can</3
#mar.txt#still very much upset about losing him,but it's kind of faded for numbness now#still not holding up great though especially considering how sudden it was#he was all fine and healthy and then just suddenly started to rapidly go downhill and within like. two days he was gone#he was so weak. couldn't move almost at all,his meows were barely just meow-sounding exhales. the last two things he did were#getting my attention so i would come to him,then attempted to crawl onto my lap and despite me being less than a foot away he couldn't make#it. so i brought him onto my bed on my lap with me. and then at some point later after another sudden onset of diarrhea (which seemed to#take absolutely all of his remaining strength) and i'd brought him back to my bed after cleaning the poop off of him he got my attention to#move his head so he could look up at me. and that's how he passed. looking up at me.#despite everything,he was purring. so weak and faint i could hardly feel it,but. he was purring,maybe until the moment he finally passed.#he was obviously suffering. and we couldn't afford to get someone to put him down so we just did what we could for him.#i'm glad that,at least,he was happy in his final moments. he wanted to be with me and i'm glad i could give him that. i HAD needed to go out#that day but i opted to stay home because i was worried he'd pass while i was gone. sure enough if i had gone out he would have.#i'm glad i could give him the comfort and company he wanted in his final moments. i'm glad i made him happy enough in them to purr even#despite how weak he was. i'm glad he didn't pass alone and possibly in pain.#ive lost a lot of pets in my life. but amos? he's only like. three years younger than me? we practically grew up together. ive known him his#entire life. no amount of being told it hurts to lose a childhood pet will ever compare to the reality of it happening.#i buried him outside my window. so he's close to home.#vent post? i guess?
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beatcroc · 2 months
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listen. i love pizza tower with my whole heart & mind. you know this. you Know. but first and foremost i am a character design bitch, and the pizzas are, frankly, very bland. this is not a critique or a complaint, because obviously That's Not The Point and more importantly i would be horrified if anyone tried doing that much animation with anything more complex than what's there. but also it means when i get a taste of some truly whack ass insane design work again it is like fuuuucking catnip
#ive been DEPRIVED......#pizza business is on hiatus i need to play lethal league for 50 hours and make a surely ill-fated cosplay about it#it really is unfortunate fake pep could have been a fun cosplay for the way i wanted to go about it#but for all the schematics i had sketched out it was never a thing i wanted to get up and actually try to Make#and then i wake up the next day after playing llb once and go like oh. ohhhhhh. i need to be doombox irl#and because of that realizing. oh that was misplaced idle thoughts before; i never actually wanted to do fp for real#i was just on that train bc 1. very passionate about the game obviously [and he was kind of my only option to rep pt] and 2.#i think it was a lot of leftover inertia from my PREVIOUS cosplay idea [baozhai from indivisible] that i also never pursued#lots of Makin Stuff drive still existing but not having a place to go.#fp was certainly more doable than baozhai so it was easy to latch on but#still not....really the kind of thing i actually Enjoy making#this one though. ohgghhgh i feel it. i feel the cosmos#i still dont think i'm actually going to complete it. the current projection is that i just make a shitty prototype and then#realize how impossible and unfun this is gonna be and then drop it. [but its fine bc i still got to make stuff and got the idea out]#however. that first pizza comic was also originally a single-image prototype to get the idea across bc#i didn't think i would actually draw out that whole thing either.#so i guess we'll just see what happens. now won't we.#poor fuckin noisette comic 2 man i put it off for so long and then finally get into it and then this happens#ill get back on it eventually this is just something i have to indulge while i have it and get it out of my system#its like evangelion. sometimes you have to write 8k words of analysis. and sometimes you gotta make a really stupid cosplay#anyway hey i should post the fp cosplay schematics huh. i meant to back when i first did them but then didnt. whoops#bweeeaaahh
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running-in-the-dark · 4 months
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ooooh. we got an apartment!!!
the house isn't completely finished yet so we can't move in until April. we'll have to figure that out. but that's fine. it's in the town where my husband works! which is amazing.
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“Omg Edward and Bella are so Odysseus and Penelope coded” that’s how it sounds to me each time anyone compares a mlm ship to achilles and patroklos
#just say that you only know 3 mlm couples and move on#no one makes that kind of comparasions with straight couples no one#yknow why#because no one lumps them together! they are allowed to be different even if they have physical similarities!#yes this is specifically about rwrb heartstopper and yr#they are like the big three' regarding mIm fiction and i just dont get it??#plus they are ALWAYS compared to tsoa achilles and patroklos#sure theyre good but they are all treated like they are the same thing like all the characters are similar#spoiler alert they arent#(straight) people mix their personalities together to make a palpable smoothie that they can drink and say ‘oh im such an ally dont you see’#plus when comparing them to achilles and patroklus they mean tsoa patrochilles obviously#because their characters are SO BLAND in that book that their personality can be altered for personal enjoyment and still be same#‘alex and henry and charlie and nick and simon and wilhelm are SO achilles and patroclus😍🥺’#do you know literally any other mlm fictional couple? have you ever read a mlm book written by a gay guy?#because as far as i know heartstopper rwrb and yr arent made by gay guys#and while that is fine the representation is very good and alice and casey are both queer#i have the suspicion that the straight women that say that have never read anything writtenby a gay guy because i did and let me tell you#they write things very differently they are unapologetically queer they arent palpable to *that* straight audience#yknow i love casey and not saying their books arent queer (they absolutely are) but for example heartsopper since its idealized#its not something that make you feel the struggles and the hate etc so strsight audiences can binge on it without seeing themselves#reflected on the homophobic characters or have their own prejudices be turned upside down#anyway fck madeline miller fck fetishizing borderline homophobic women who only read mlm and for the love of god leave rwrb and yr ALONE#rwrb#young royals#heartstopper#achilles#patroklos#achilles and patroclus
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hecksupremechips · 5 months
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I always heard people say that Layla should’ve gotten with Warren Peace instead of Will in sky high but guys come on it’s 2023 we all all know she and warren were just bearding for each other I’m sick of pretending they weren’t
#sky high#and okay maybe im projecting because just look at them and the amount of gay awakenings that were had to them#my own 😵‍💫#im a warren peace stan is this even kinda surprising hes emo he reads hes hotheaded he likes shitty poetry crap he has bad social skills#of course i was into him#and layla too come on shes got absolutely broken plant powers but shes a pacifist shes sweet shes an activist she calls the school fascist#but no yeah layla and warren so very clearly were not interested in each other at all like they will be bomb ass besties but romantically no#warren was literally playing the role of gbf like Layla was talking about will and hes like#girl just kiss him already#he had no desire to be with her romantically and was pretty explicity not into holding her hand#but he played along cuz he just wanted to make will mad like this is such gbf behavior akdjks#just like ‘oh so you wanna piss off your shitty crush? lol okay lets do this 😎’#plus like just look at him hes simply gay your honor#layla now layla is painfully obviously gay and its gonna hit her like a train#weve all wanted her to be gay our whole lives but noooo she had to get with boring fucking will#in my version she and will date for a while but feelings get complicated#she isnt sure if she likes will or if she just chose him cuz it was convenient to like her male friend#she always looked at other girls a bit longer than what was ‘normal’#but she isnt into labels! she doesnt need to worry about this! its fine everything is fine-#shes just an over eager ally thats all#the crisis lasts for years warren gives her The Stare shes like 🫣#listen im just trying to live out my childhood dream and make the characters i had an indescribable fascination with gay#and yes i was just watching sky high what about it
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ozlices · 6 months
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oh yeah i took a curious peak at the yttd manga like. idk. a week ago. i only read the first couple chapters, but. it's... so different. & somehow MORE GRAPHIC???????? i skimmed to see how they handled mishima & somehow it's more traumatizing than the game. wtf.
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