#who IS still alive! just... at this point in the timeline. he's not doin too great

[sekhisadventures]

For Quel’thalas

Dalaran, the Legerdemain Lounge

Nelen sighed as the meeting resumed, Chromie having returned to the Dragon Isles with a promise to contact the members of Avalon and Savage Untied should Nyloc make a reappearance, but for now his trail had gone cold. He could be anywhere, and given that he was a Chronomancer and working with the Infinite Dragonflight, he could be anywhen as well.

“Right… so… that’s essentially what happened.” finished Nelen, bringing the rest of his allies up to speed. The only member in absentia was Sekhi, the vulpera having returned to Orgrimmar after their last timeline jump. None of them begrudged her however. Visiting a timeline where her family had fallen to a monster like Dissonantia was a horrible experience, she needed time to process what had happened and to be around her family in this timeline.

“Bloody fel… that’s quite th’ tale lad.” rumbled Dareley, “Still, a world where Arthas returned to th’ Light. I woulda liked ta see that one…” he smiled a bit sadly. Dareley would likely have a grown-up son or daughter in that timeline. Had the Scourge not come to Lordaeron City, his wife and unborn child would still be alive and born respectively.

Jaie sighed, “Yeah. It was really something, seeing my dad again…” she nodded, “But… I don’t think I’ll tell my mom this one. It was hard on her finding out I heard his voice in the Shadowlands. She told me she didn’t want Sekhi to help her hear him, so… yeah… I’m just going to let it go.”

Shalandrae frowned, “That last one bothers me. Dissonantia came back and was the avatar of an Old God? Can she follow you back here?” she asked, raising a bushy eyebrow.

Nelen shook his head, “Chromie said she couldn’t. Y’shaarj had some nasty powers, but none of them involved controlling time. It shouldn’t be possible… but… well… here’s hoping.” he shrugged awkwardly.

The group nodded at that, then Mola’raum leaned forward from his spot on the wall. He didn’t sit down for the meetings, the chairs were always too small for his lanky body. “Wut about dis ‘Nyloc’ mon? He froze us all in time ‘n tried ta gib ya. Wut be stoppin’ ‘im from doin’ it again?” he asked.

Nelen nodded, “Chromie told me, before she left, that she would visit Avalon House and Savage United Headquarters and set up some sort of temporal protections so that he can’t do that to us there. Its not a guarantee, but it should help.”

Zhan-min let out a harrumph, drinking down a mug of ale as he did, “Well I sure hope so! Th’ idea of someone knifin’ me when I can’t even see it comin’ ain’t exactly a comfortable one.”

Nelen nodded, “Still… that’s just a more personal problem for us. We still have to worry about those dreams we’ve all been having.” he pointed out, returning to the reason they had all gathered in Dalaran in the first place.

“Yeah… us hearing Azeroth’s voice… and this ‘Harbinger’ creature.” frowned Nitika, “I wonder, just how far are their voices spreading. Who else is hearing them?” she murmured.

Samantha leaned forward onto her elbows, “Anyone who is powerful enough magically, or connected to the Void somehow most likely Nitts.” she pointed out, then glanced to her side as her hair-tentacles twitched.

She and Annulus had a horrible suspicion that Nyloc may not be their only concern soon…

Oribos, the Shadowlands

Above the Eternal City floated the golden form of the Arbiter. Once a mere aspirant Pelagos had become so much more, taking on the role of the central figure to the realm of Death as he guided all who were brought there to their just rewards in the infinite realms of the Shadowlands.

However, when he took up the duties he hadn’t quite realized just how many souls that was. He was a dedicated arbiter and took his role seriously, but there were countless worlds in the Great Dark and people died every day. Some of the souls had been there for quite some time.

Swirling around him amid the sea of spirits awaiting judgement was one who was… well… probably bound for Revendreth or perhaps Maldraxxus, somewhere along those lines. He accepted this. He had no illusions that he was not exactly a good person. He had killed, for coin and for duty, but that was his life. For now he was content to let the stream carry him along. After all that had happened it was almost… peaceful.

… but such things were not meant to be.

With a small whisper the soul vanished… but there were so many that Pelagos didn’t even see it. Like a single ant vanishing from an army.

A Hidden Cellar in the Eastern Kingdoms

Pain, screaming, more pain, his body shook and thrashed as his nerves flared in agony! He gasped, his eyes screwed up and his jaw gritted so hard he could feel his teeth grinding.

Finally he jolted, his back arching before he fell still. “W… what… where…” he looked around. This was not the Shadowlands. This was… familiar…

He looked down at himself and saw, on his side, two massive gashes from a pair of daggers sewn tightly shut. “No…” he whispered, sitting up, then feeling over his face.

His skin was cold and his sense of touch was muted. Then he saw a mirror on the far wall and he let out a gasp of horror.

His face looked back at him, pale as death with eyes glowing a baleful red. “No… no!” he shouted, scooting back.

“Yes.” came an aristocratic woman’s voice.

His head snapped around, looking at the source of it. Standing there was a sin’dorei noblewoman in resplendent robes of red and gold, a set of three spheres radiating icy cold hovering around her head. At her hip was a sheathed dagger, and her other hip had a book of spells hanging off a harness built into her belt.

“Alalestria…” he whispered, “What have you done?!” he demanded, scrambling to his feet.

“What I must, to defend Quel’thalas. I did not give you leave to abandon your duties Sinranir.” she replied icily.

“Abandon… I DIED ALALESTRIA! I was done! Ended! Over! This…” he looked down at himself, but there was no mistaking it. He had seen Sylvannas plenty of times before she had been banished to the Maw, he knew exactly what she had done.

He had died, but now he was back from the dead. A Darkfallen. An undead elf.

“Have you lost your MIND?! You would use the magics of the SCOURGE of all things?!” he shouted at her, his crimson eyes narrowing in fury at what had been done to him.

“You did not see what I saw Sinranir.” she glared. “The ren’dorei are a greater threat than even I imagined. You will take up your daggers for House Wintersky once more.”

At this, the undead rogue smirked, “I think not. When I died your father’s geas died with me. Find yourself someone else. I wash my hands of this.” he sneered, making for the door. He got all of two steps before Alalestria gestured and pain shot through his body, the elven man falling to his knees with a gasp.

“Father’s geas is gone, yes… but I raised you from the dead Sinranir. Do you truly think I would not take measures to ensure that you would perform your duties?” she frowned at him, arching an eyebrow.

He hissed through his teeth, his eyes narrowing to crimson slits… but he couldn’t even reply in this state. Alalestria had him, whether he liked it or not.

She held him for a moment longer, then released him. “Now. We have armor and weapons prepared in the room across the hall. Go collect them and return to your quarters. You will have your orders in due time.” she nodded curtly, pointing to the door.

Sinranir got to his feet and glared at her, hatred for what she had done to him in every line of his face, but after a moment he nodded. “As you wish, Lady Wintersky.” he spat, leaving the room.

She watched him go, then frowned. She was not exactly happy about this either… but the dreams. That elven woman with the purple hair and eyes that glowed with the dark power of the Void.

Yes, Sam'ael and the ren’dorei must be dealt with, and soon…

Next Story

Previous Story

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Haven

Breach Masterlist

Warnings: non/dubcon sex (series), general angst

This is dark!Winter Soldier/Bucky and explicit. 18+ only.

Note: This was already posted on ao3 last week so I’m just putting it here too.

A few familiar characters show up and as for the timeline, as mentioned we're right after it was announced the Berlin Wall would come down, so we're in about 1990 atm. That means certain events in the MCU timeline have changed or haven't even happened!

I won’t demand but do ask for feedback; likes, reblogs, replies, comments, asks, especially on this series, but again, enjoy in your own way! <3 Love you!

Steve asked James, rather this man he called ‘Bucky, if he had a car. You thought it odd since James had sought the man out for help but you trusted that he was cautious enough for the both of you.

You’d left the car a few streets over. You sat in the back with Luka as he began to nod off and James drove as Steve gave directions. You hugged your son anxiously and inhaled the scent of his unwashed hair. You hoped you would have a bed for the night, if you were fortunate, a shower.

The street lights cast shadows on the men in the front as the New York streets passed by. Even a soviet-born Russian like yourself marveled at the infamous city. Never in all your life had you expected to end up there.

“You don’t live in Brooklyn?” James asked as his gripped the steering wheel.

“I do. Bought mom’s old place,” Steve answered, “But I can’t take you there, Buck.”

James was silent. He sighed as you pondered this friend’s name for him. ‘Bucky’. It sounded odd and didn’t seem to fit the man you knew. And yet, like much of his character, it confounded you. Perhaps it suited him after all.

“Not because of you, but to protect you,” Steve intoned. “Same reason we didn’t take my car.”

“Protect me?” James peeked in the rear view mirror as you stared at his silhouette.

“I’ll explain when we’re standing still,” Steve said curtly as he brushed back his hair with his fingers.

“Right,” James said grimly. “How ya doin’ back there?”

“Fine,” You answered in Russian without thinking. He nodded and continued on.

Silence pervaded the cramped space of the Chrysler as Steve pointed James down the next street. Luka’s soft snores floated around you and warmed your chest as he leaned against you. You dared to hope that you might sleep that night.

James pulled into an underground garage next to a high rise. The two men climbed out of the front seat and James opened the door for you and took Luka gently into his arms. The boy didn’t stir as he was cradled against his father. You stepped out into the smelly garage and Steve waved you onward.

He led you up a staircase and past several business housed in the building above. He stopped at an unmarked metal door one would assume was a utility closet and shoved a key in the slot. He opened it carefully and ushered you inside. The door closed heavily behind him as he flipped the lights on.

Within was a small living space that surprised you. There was a sofa, chair, a single bed in the corner, and a smaller door just beside the narrow counter along the wall. There was a square table at the far end with a boxy computer and an old telephone. James’s eyes scanned the room as if searching for some trap.

“A safehouse for now,” Steve explained. “This is my Plan B but haven’t had to use it so far.”

“Plan B for what?” James hissed.

“Just in case,” Steve shrugged. “It’s safe here, besides.” He strode past the couch and turned back. “This folds out.”

James nodded and crossed to the small bed in the corner. He sat as he laid Luka down and slipped him beneath the quilt. He touched his cheek before he parted and stood to face his old friend. Steve looked between the two of you.

“So, I take it you two met in Russia?” Steve chuckled. “You know, that’s a long way to go for a wife, Buck.”

James said nothing as he tucked his hands in his jeans pockets. The phone rang and Steve flinched as he grabbed it before the second chime. He put it to his ear and listened. He replied with two short words; “Eagle. Demo.”

The line clicked loudly from the mouthpiece and Steve replaced the phone in its cradle.

“We have tonight,” Steve stated as he leaned against the table and crossed his arms. “You can rest. Get clean up in the shower,” He nodded towards the other door, “There’s food in the cupboard. Basic rations but we’ll get better tomorrow.”

“Then what?” James asked sharply. “We go to S.H.I.E.L.D.? That’s who you’re with, right?”

“I am and I’m not,” Steve answered. “But the important thing is I know people who can keep you safe.”

“Safe? Do you even know what we’re running from?” Bucky sneered.

“Not hard to guess,,” Steve tilted his head and sniffed. “Buck, do you have any idea how unbelievable this is? That you’re still alive? How much of a relief it is?” He dropped his arms and pushed himself away from the table. He crossed to James and clapped his shoulder, “Bucky.”

The other man winced and grabbed Steve’s hand. He pushed it away and held up his own. He slowly rolled his glove up his palm and slid free his fingers. He turned his metal hand in show and lowered it in shame.

“Can’t say they never gave me any gifts,” James uttered, “Though I would say I paid for it.”

Steve frowned as he watched James’ hand then looked him in the eye.

“Well, good thing I didn’t say anything about finding you in one piece,” Steve scoffed.

“Ha,” James snorted and shook his head. “You promise your friends are gonna play nice?”

“You trust me?” Steve challenged.

“Always,” James avowed.

“They’ll play nice.” Steve assured him, “But you know it’s not that simple.”

“I know,” James grumbled as Steve brushed by him and went to the door, “But I’m not worried about me.” He paused and looked at you, then Luka, “You understand?”

“I do. You know we’ve always been as good as family, Buck.”

“That was a long time ago,” James insisted. “A different life.”

“Yeah,” Steve rested his hand on the door handle. “But we’re not so different.” Steve smiled and peered past James, “It was nice to meet you.” He opened the door slowly as he spoke. “You two have a good night. Get some sleep. You look like you need it.”

Steve shut the door behind him as he stepped out into the hallway. The door locked from the other side and James stared at the metal barrier. You stood behind him, still, silent, watching as he hung his head. You neared the couch and sat.

“James,” You said gently, “You are going to sit and tell me who Bucky is and how he knows Steve Rogers.”

James turned and swallowed as he looked at you. He approached reluctantly and sat beside you. He leaned back and gripped his thighs as if to brace himself. His fingers danced on his knee anxiously and he nodded.

“My name is James Buchanan Barnes and Steve Rogers is my best friend. We served together in Europe. We grew up together in Brooklyn. He was this kid, used to wear newspapers in his shoes, built like a toothpick. His mother, Sarah, was his only family besides me. But that was before I died in the war; before I was the Soldat…”

✰

James let you have the foldout couch to yourself. You were unused to the emptiness beside you but you hadn’t the heart to move Luka as he dozed soundly. James took his usual spot on the floor.  He slept with his back against the door though you doubted he actually got much rest. You woke often and looked at him, sometimes his head slumped down, and others he seemed to stare endlessly into the dark.

James roused first and you sat up as you heard him open the cupboard. You grumbled and stripped the thin mattress before folding it away. You left the thin blankets in the chair as James turned on the single burner on the counter. He set the kettle atop it and turned to face you.

“Tea?” He asked. You nodded as he leaned against the counter.

Luka slept on and you let him until a knock came at the door and woke him. As James set out two mugs of steaming tea, three short raps came and had him frozen. He motioned for you to stay back as he neared the door and you went to Luka as he rubbed his eyes and sat up in confusion.

James unlocked the door and inched it open. His shoulders dropped and he stepped back to let Steve in. Another man followed him and James quickly stiffened. The man strode haughtily inside, his silver hair combed back neatly, as he wore a tailored suit that bespoke of money.

“Howard,” James greeted the strange man with a grimace. The door closed heavily and pierced the tension between them. “Why’s he here?”

“He’s a friend. A real friend.” Steve said.

You helped Luka out of bed and sat him at the table with the box of tea biscuits you found in the cupboard.

“Don’t be rude, James,” You managed in your best English, “You ask if they want tea.”

“James,” The man he called Howard chuckled.

James sighed. “Do you want tea?” He asked tersely.

“We’re good,” Howard answered with a smirk. “So, I think my first question is where they came from?” He pointed at you and Luka. “Lucky the kid looks like his mom.”

“Really, Steve? This jackass.”

“Buck, you don’t understand. S.H.I.E.L.D., it’s not… not safe. There're approximately three people you can trust in this country and we’re two of them.” Steve insisted.

“Three? Who’s the third?”

“Peggy,” Steve replied curtly. “Everyone else, well, we’ve figured there hand-in-hand with the bastards who chased you here.”

“Hydra?” James asked, Steve nodded. “They’re here? Where?”

“Calm down,” Howard strolled around the room as he felt around in his jacket. ��We’ll fill you in once you do the same for us.” The man stopped beside Luka and pulled out a bill. “Here, kid, maybe later you’re mother can take you out to buy some candy.”

Luka’s eyes rounded at the money and you nodded to him. “What do you say, mishka?”

“Thank you, sir,” He smiled and accepted the money.

“You didn’t have to--” You said as Howard grinned.

“Got a boy myself. Bit older but I miss when he was smaller. Easier to handle.” He said. “And I’m fairly sure those cookies are well past stale.”

“So it’s just the three of you? Against Hydra?” James interjected. “You really think you can help me?”

“We have safeguards,” Howard turned back. “And it’s better to keep enemies close.”

“Not Hydra,” James’ hands balled into fists. “You don’t understand--”

“No, but we want to try.” Howard neared him. “Look, I’d say that kid is what? Four? Five? And there was a certain Soviet assassin that just up and disappeared as many years ago. A certain experiment abandoned after its perpetrators were slaughtered… think maybe you can fill in the details?”

James paled and looked to you. His eyes fell to Luka and he blinked. “Not in front of the kid.” He glanced at Steve pleadingly. “I’ll talk,” James snarled, “Just… the boy. He can’t--” He took a breath. “Come on, Howard. You said you had a son, too. Please.”

“It’s early, we don’t have to get into it right now,” He raised his hand defensively. “I just needed to know that I was right.”

“And I need to know that you’re gonna keep them safe. I don’t care about me, but they didn’t do anything.” James stepped closer to the man until they were chest to chest. “You swear to me that they’re safe and I will tell you everything.”

“Mother knows something too, she must,” Howard said.

“I tell you,” You stood and squeezed Luka’s shoulder before you left him. “But as James say, not in front of boy.”

Howard considered you then turned back to James. “We’ll move you tonight. Bigger place, much nicer too. Then, we’ll have a long debriefing.” He turned to Steve and checked his watch. “You keep them here until I can get it sorted out. You know the rules.”

“Got it,” Steve said. “And Peggy?”

“One thing at a time,” Howard said as he went to the door, “As far as she’s concerned, you took the day off.”

[samthemarvelfan]

Goodbyes: Chapter Seven

Summary: Ella Monroe is the Avengers newest recruit, handpicked by Steve Rogers himself. Indebted to him for reasons unknown, Cap pairs her up with Bucky Barnes. He is tasked with training her to relearn and hone the skills that have long since rusted. Bucky is cold and distant, and Ella can’t seem to break through the wall he’s built up for decades. He sees something in her though, and it scares him to death. Has the fate of these two strangers been sealed? …or will they always be longing…

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x OFC, feat Steve Rogers, Sam Wilson, Tony Stark

Warnings: DARKER THEMES AHEAD. Angst, Bucky is a dick, mutual pining, self sabotage, PTSD, Fluff! Mentions of Panic attacks, flashbacks, and vomiting Def not following a specific MCU canon or timeline.

A/N: WOW! I am so grateful for all the love! Thank you so much @captain-rogers-beard for taking the time to not only read, but enjoy and reblog my work! i am honored! Please enjoy this hastily written chapter. (life is hard, but i love yall so much(

Taglist:@iheartsebastianstan @jjlizz @stuckysbabe @sk493494 @lefoutoir @nickangel13 @marvelismysafezone @lilulo-12 @heartofagamotto​  (strikethrough means the tag didn’t work! I’m sorry! Tags are OPEN!)

Bucky should have kissed her.

When he woke up, it was the only thing on his mind. He would do just about anything to turn the clock back, so he could grab her face in his hands and feel her pillowy lips against his.

Just imagining it sent a familiar heat to Bucky’s lower abdomen.

“Hey Iceman, what’s up?” Sam said as he entered the training room.

Bucky looked up, shaken out of his daydream, “Hey Sam, hows it going?”

Sam feigned a look of shock, “Wow you’re in a good mood this mornin’! Any particular reason why? Hm?”

Bucky smiled to himself as he moved equipment to make space, “I’m not sure what you mean.”

Sam laughed, “Whatever you say, just tell me one thing—y’all fuck yet or what?”

Bucky stopped dead in his tracks, “What?”

“You and Ella. Did you guy fuck yet?”

His causal tone threw Bucky for a loop. Bucky swallowed hard and shook his head, “Sam it’s not..I don’t...I’m just—“

“See that’s your problem right there,” Sam interjected, “you don’t know what the hell you want with that girl, but you know you want her. I’ve seen you guys in a room together, the sexual tension is off the charts.”

Bucky laid mats down in the center of the room, “Sam, she’s just a—“

“A recruit. Yeah I know, but if you think for one second I believe that’s all you see her as then Iceman, I got some baaaad news for you.”

Sam took a sip from his water bottle, taking in Bucky’s expression. He looked happy on the surface, but Sam saw the dissatisfaction wading underneath.

“Bucky,” Sam called. He only ever used his name when he was serious. “Why are you so hard on that girl? It’s so obvious you two are crazy about one another. Why are you pushing her away?”

Bucky looked up to Sam, and simply shook his head. “I’m not good. For her or anybody else...but especially her.”

Sam look at him confused, “What the hell is that suppose to mean?”

Bucky sighed, running his hand through his hair. “Don’t you think I would love to be a guy who could have a girl like that on my arm without worrying I might kill her? That I could take her out somewhere and not have this constant paranoia hanging over my head like a guillotine ready to drop at any second?”

Bucky hadn’t said these thoughts out loud to anyone, not even Steve. “Sam she’s...she’s everything I want but can never have. I gotta keep my distance, but she makes it impossible. I’m mean to her, downright cruel, and boy, does she give it back to me...” Bucky smiled and let out a chuckle at the thought.

“But she’s kind. She’s so sweet and genuine and I-I’m a time bomb. Ella...she’s been through hell and back. I don’t want her to have to go through anything like that again.”

Sam stood in front of his friend, seeing the pain in his eyes. He sighed taking a step toward Bucky, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Does she make you happy?”

Bucky looked up confused, “Did you not just hear m—“

“Does. She. Make. You. Happy?” Sam repeated.

Bucky nodded slowly, “She makes me feel alive again. After feeling nothing for almost a century.”

Sam nodded to himself. “If I were you Barnes? I wouldn’t push away my chance at happiness. Who knows? You might be her chance too.”

You look through the doors to the training room and see Sam with Bucky.

Is he passing me off to Sam again? You think.

You take a deep breath and push the door open. They stop their conversation and Sam turns to you.

“What’s up, Punchline? How you doin’?” He asks happily.

You can’t help but smile, his grin is infectious. “Hey Sam, you joining in on the fun today?” You ask, hoping for a regretful answer.

Sam shakes his head, “No, apparently Barnes wants you all to himself. Isn’t that right, Iceman?”

You look to Bucky whose gaze is unwavering, “Ella needs an actual trainer, not a comedian with a whistle.” He jests.

Sam’s jaw drops open slightly and you let out a small giggle.

“Alright, alright. I see when I’m not wanted. Catch ya later, Punchline. And Barnes, I’ll see you in hell.” He flips Bucky off on his way out the door, and you can’t help but laugh.

A few moment pass as a comfortable silence falls over the room. You try not too, but you can’t help but remember the last time you were here. When you were alone with Sergeant Barnes, and what happened.

When he almost killed you.

He noticed the sudden discomfort in your eyes. “Hi, Els.” His smooth, honey voice calls to you; drawing you in.

“Hey, Sarge.” You reply kindly.

He steps forward, testing the waters. “Bucky.” He says.

You look at him confused. “What?”

“Bucky. Use my name. Please.” He says quietly.

“But I thought—“

“I like your voice. The way you say my name...I like it.” His boldness takes you by surprise, but nonetheless you smile.

A small nod, “Bucky.” You say happily.

He smiles back, a real genuine smile. One of the first you think you’ve seen from him.

“Where’s your sling, Doll?” He asks concerned.

“Oh,” you say baring your bandage covered shoulder to him. “When I woke up this morning, my shoulder was...I don’t know. It feels...different? The wound itself still hurts but somehow, it feels healed.”

Bucky’s brow furrows, “Can I?” He gestured to the bandage, and you nod.

He gently sweeps your hair behind your shoulder, rubbing circles on the exposed skin.

When he pulls back the bandage he can’t help but be a little curious.

“Have you ever been injured like this before?” He asks, replacing the bandage.

You shake your head. “No, when I was...where I was, they were very careful not to hurt me this bad.”

“Why’s that?” He asked.

You smile sadly, “Can’t use a punching bag with a hole in it, can you?”

A flash of anger dances in Bucky’s eyes. “I’m sorry, Doll.”

You shrug, “I can’t change the past, no point in living in it.” You push the flashbacks out as they threaten your mind once again. You’re not going to ruin this. Not this time.

Bucky strokes your arm a few times, before his hand grasps at yours loosely. “When HYDRA had you, Steve said they experimented on you?”

He asks like he’s afraid of both your reaction and your answer.

You nod. “Yeah. They injected me with so many solutions and serums. I have no idea what any of it was or did.”

Bucky smiled softly and gently thumbed your knuckles. “Well whatever it was, one of them must have helped you with healing. Steve and I share that trait too. Cuts heal in hours, fractures and breaks in a few days.”

You nod thoughtfully to yourself. “Huh, finally a perk from those assholes.”

He dropped your hand softly, “We’re gonna take it easy still...I don’t wanna push you too hard.”

A laugh escapes your lips before you can stop it.

“What?” Bucky asks curiously.

“Who are you and what have you done with the real Sergeant Barnes?” You ask sarcastically.

Without missing a beat, Bucky steps into you, cupping your cheek with his hand. The pad of his thumb is swept over your cheekbone tenderly, prickling your skin with goosebumps.

“I’m trying to be me. The real me. We got off to a terrible start and that’s my fault. I’m sorry.” His voice is so genuine and honest, it takes you by surprise.

“You like keeping me on my toes, huh?” You ask.

He nods fondly, “I could say the same about you, ya k now.”

Silence crept into the room, blanketing the air you shared with him. Suddenly, you can’t help but look to his lips.

It would be so easy to kiss him, too easy. You look down to Bucky’s feet hoping to shake the eagerness from your bones, but it doesn’t help.

“Look at me, Els...” he coaxes you.

You catch his gaze again, and your breathing hitches in your chest.

“I’m gonna earn your trust, Doll. I promise.” Bucky whispers.

Before you had the chance to reply, a chime echoed in the room.

“Excuse me, Sergeant Barnes you’re needed urgently in briefing room C.” FRIDAY’s accent called out.

He looked confused for a moment, “On whose order?”

“Mr. Stark’s.” It was a simple reply, but a telling one nonetheless.

Bucky looked at you quickly, “Let’s go.”

On your way back to the compound, you couldn’t help the nervous feeling in your stomach. Since Tony retired, he never helped out for missions. He came in a few times a month to check on the property and get debriefings from the staff, but his main job was being a Dad.

That’s why when you heard it was him calling for Bucky, you knew something was up.

“What do you think it is?” You asked Bucky, shoving your hands deep in your pockets.

The elevator doors opened and Bucky ushered you out, placing his hand on the small of your back.

“Not sure, but if Tony’s involved it can’t be good.”

As you approached the room, you saw Cap, Bruce, Sam and Wanda at the table, Tony heading the meeting.

You slowed, allowing Bucky to walk ahead of you.

“Come on, Doll.” He said matter-of-factly.

You shook your head, “They didn’t ask for me.”

Bucky chuckled, “Just come on.” He grabbed your hand and pulled you with him. 

The room got instantly quiet. “Look who decided to join us...” Sam jested.

“Hey, Buck.” Steve said kindly.

You sat in the chair by the door, ready to leave if you were asked too. Why should you be here? You’re not an Avenger—or whatever these guys are called now.

“We all know why we’re here. They’re back. This time it seems like for good.” Tony spoke.

He pressed a button on the console, projecting a hologram above the table.

It showed an aerial image of some kind of camp, though fortress would probably be the better word. You stared at the image, when your stomach suddenly dropped. Your skin prickling and clammy before you had time to think.

“Where is this?” Wanda asked.

“Romania.” You whispered.

All eyes were suddenly on you. “Ella? You know this place?” Steve asked.

You nodded subtly, “Y-yeah. I—excuse me.”

Feet carrying you faster than your body wanted, you ran from the conference room. Opting for the stairs instead of the elevator, you run down the several flights to the living quarters.

Luckily, you made it to your bathroom before you were sick. Unable to stop the dry heaving and shaking, you knew there was no point. You’d successfully avoided the flashbacks for over a year, stealing your mind had become second nature, but this...this was too much.

The light headed feeling over took you as you laid in your bed. You desperately drank water, hoping to calm your nerves, but nothing was helping. This was a panic attack, one of the worst you could remember.

“Ella? Ella open up.” Steve’s voice was outside your room, muffled by the door.

You couldn’t speak. You couldn’t move.

“FRIDAY?” You heard him ask. The A.I. didn’t respond, she simply unlocked the door.

You were in the fetal position now, hugging the pillow desperately to your chest.

“Ella.” He said, moving his hand to stroke your back. His touch elicited a fight or flight response you’d been denying for months. You instinctively began kicking and punching him.

“No! No! Don’t take me! Don’t touch me! Stop!” You screamed at the top of your lungs. Steve wasn’t there. You were suddenly back in Romania, in the cell you’d been kept in. The faceless men of your mind were there, touching you. Stabbing you. Hurting you.

“Ella no! Please it’s me, it’s Steve. You gotta fight it, Ella.” He tried you comfort you. “You’re safe, Ella, I promise you’re safe!”

Without warning, the faceless men vanished. Revealing a panicked Steve, sat just inches from you on your bed.

Oxygen filled your lungs once again, as you began to come down from your panic attack.

“Steve?” You question.

He nodded, stroking your hair. “It’s me. You’re safe. It’s me.” He pulled you in for a hug.

You blinked the tears out of your eyes, “Oh my God. Steve, I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking embarrassed.”

He shook it head, “Stop that. Stop that right now, you have nothing to be embarrassed about. I didn’t know you’d be coming in with Buck, I wouldn’t have let them show that had I known...”

“No, I can’t be put in this bubble and hidden away my whole life! It’s not your fault, it just took me off guard, I haven’t seen that place...thought about it in so long I just...” your voice drifted off as you wiped your eyes.

The camp was where you’d been held--where you’d been taken from your family and hidden away all those years ago.

It took a while, but you’d calmed down. People kept coming to check on you, but Cap would kindly move them along, giving you the space you so desperately needed.

It seemed everyone had come to see you, except one person. The one person you actually wanted to see.

“Cap? Where’s Bucky?” You ask innocently

Steve sighed, “Bucky’s been sent ahead of the rest of us.”

Your eyes widened, “Sent? Sent where? Not Romania. Steve he can’t do this alone he can’t, they’ll—“

“We’re headed there tonight. In just a few hours in fact.” He replied, cutting you off.

You stood from your bed grabbing your pistol from the night stand. “Let’s go now, he needs backup.” You’re desperately trying to hide the panic in your voice.

“Ella no, we’re going. You’re not ready for this.” Steve stood from you bed as well, what does he mean not ready?

“Steve I can’t just sit here and—“

“You can and you will. That’s an order, Ella. It’s clear you need more time to heal, both mentally and physically.” Steve put a gentle hand on your shoulder. “You said it yourself, you need time. I want you to take it.”

The wind had been knocked out of you. You nod at Steve somberly, accepting his words for what they were; orders.

A few hours after Steve had left, you hear the rumble of the Quinjet take off from the roof. Despite the lack of worry in his voice, you could help the awful feeling in your stomach, telling you something terrible was going to happen...

and you couldn’t do anything about it.

You worried for Bucky, but despite your worry you couldn't help wonder why he just left. Why he wouldn't come check on you, or at least say goodbye. He just...left.

You flopped on the couch in the common room, flicking mindlessly through the channels. Tonight would bring nothing but sleepless bouts and nightmares.

You shut the tv off and stare at the ceiling, unsure of when, or if you’d see Bucky Barnes again.

Chapter Eight: Light Bulb

[suffering-and-happy-about-it]

Dreams that keep you up in the still of the night (Favored Ones, Part 25.)

Series description: Many things were surely fucked up in the year 2038, but no-one ever told anyone how all of it went down. What happened before a group of people left for Seattle to handle personal matters? Why did one girl refuse to leave all of it be? And why there were so many dead in the end?

Quote for the chapter: “All the promises at sundown... I meant them like the rest.” - Pearl Jam

Part summary: For a moment there, it almost seemed that everything is going to be alright again. But as you had the time to think about what you were doing, how many people had you srewed and how many lives you’ve destroyed, you finally understood that your mind won’t be put the rest until you finish what you came to do in Seattle.

A/N: Well, we are here. It almost feels like a dream when I realize we’re almost at the end of the Seattle timeline and I have to say... I enjoyed telling you this story so, so, so much! 

Warnings: Gore, blood, murder, infected, guns, shooting, angst, graphic depiction of manslaughter, animal abuse and death, mentions of rough smut. 

Word count: 6.7 K

Tagging:   @nemodoren @xxgoldenhour @missdictatorme​​ @davnwillcome​ @pickleriiick​ @jodiereedus22​ @gladiosamicitias​ @tamkashi​ @eternallyvenus​ @avengerssstuff​ @fangirl-inthe-us​ @avery-miller​ @mikah-writes​ @mad-hatter-98​ @sadiaafrin99​ @flavorishy

Series master list: H E R E

Joel Miller’s playlist for the bonfire occasions: H E R E

Youtube playlists: JACKSON DAYS | SEATTLE DAYS

Seattle, day two - evening / Seattle, day three - shortly after midnight:

It was the gut feeling you got when you held Ellie which unsettled you, so you let one of your palms travel down to the handle of your knife while your best friend still cried on your shoulder. The touch was almost unnoticeable at the first moment, but when you heard an inhale right behind your back, you turned around aggressively as you took the knife out, going straight for that person's neck. They were strong and quick to react, catching your wrist so tightly it hurt. Just after that, you let your eyes wander on the stranger's body.

You didn't even have to see his face to know it's him who's kneeling in front of you. His smell gave him away at the exact moment when you inhaled it. Slowly, you smiled at the man and looked deep into his dark eyes. He was looking like fucking hell, but didn't you all look like that? He was muddy, bloody, wet, he had a bruise on his cheek and a violet hematoma slowly forming under his right eye. Joel was looking rough. Weirdly rough.

All of you went through hell that day - whether it was a physical hell, just like when you were escaping a whole building of Scars on your own, or when Ellie smashed Nora's body with an iron pipe. It was expected of you to cry, but all you did was that you hugged the man, your palm gently tugging on his hair as you pulled him even closer than before. Slowly, you closed your eyes, thanking every god out there for getting you your man back into your arms, David Bowie especially. - "Oh my Lord." - You hummed into his ear, sighing.

"How did you got out of the building... I... I thought you've died there, Joel." - A whisper left you as the man palmed your jaws with a grateful smile back. - "I will tell you later, 'kay? You both doin' good, are you 'kay?" - Joel stood up from you and went to hug Ellie as well, checking on her as well. Ellie was so surprised she immediately stopped crying. Somehow, the man's presence calmed her down enough for you to set on your journey back to the theatre. The rain seemed to get worse and worse during the duration of your journey. - "Did you reach the hospital?" - Joel asked when you entered the area which was already familiar to you.

"Yea, Nora isn't too happy with how the things turned out." - This answer told Joel everything he needed to know. It didn't matter which one of us have done it - it was clear that the girl isn't walking the world of the living by the time you were speaking. Which was most likely to be the expected result of the operation you were undergoing in Seattle. And honestly, Joel was somehow sure that Nora isn't the last one to die.

To everyone's surprise, Dina wasn't the one to open up the door - it was Jesse. Your black-haired Jesse. The Jackson Jesse. That one Jesse who immediately got a big, familiar hug when you saw him. At the first moment, you almost brought him down to the ground before you realized he's hurt. Something happened to him during his way to you. - "Are you out of your fucking mind? What the hell are you doing here?" - You asked, still hugging him with your eyes closed. It almost all looked like a wicked family gathering of some sort and it didn't even feel right by any means.

"Nice to see you too, geez. You're all looking awful." - Jesse took one good look at Joel, who had his whole face bruised and you were worried about what you'll find under his clothes. Ellie was looking significantly better once she hugged Dina and kissed her temple, but it still could be felt that something isn't quite adding up.

"As always, you're late to the fucking party." - Ellie mumbled on your was to the radio room where you could sit for a while, talking about what went down that day. Jesse still kept his hand over your shoulder in a friendly manner, leaning into you as you led him up the stairs carefully. - "You've missed a lot of fun here."

"Hey, I've been keeping these guys busy up in Hillcrest, you're welcome." - Jesse put his hands above his head when you sat him down on the chair, walking back to lean your head into Joel's shoulder. The man simply put his nose to your hair, taking in your scent with his eyes closed before he planted a careful kiss on your forehead. - "Y'all better start talking, because I've never seen any of you so done." - Jesse grinned and leaned his elbows to his knees, looking mainly at you and Joel. Each of you gave the others their side of the story - Ellie described how she found Jesse and then joined you in the sewers, you talked about losing Joel on the unfinished bridge, Jesse talked about his last two days in the Hillcrest neighborhood and Joel... He didn't say much other than he almost died here and there.

As soon as you gave Dina a report of what happened, everyone started to do their stuff - Jesse and Dina stayed in the radio room while you decided to take the cold shower in a tiny bathroom Ellie and Dina earlier found back in the changing room. Joel was there just a few minutes before you and told you that he hadn't felt as good in a long time.

And after two days of piling blood, dirt, and bruises on your body, even the coldest shower was feeling fucking good. It also was a good tool to wash all the thoughts and bad states of mind you had off of you. There was a small bottle of some gel and shampoo one of your fellow survivors found in the city and brought along, so you could clean yourself at least a bit - or give yourself the feeling of being clean. And because it was time to sleep already, you told your goodnight to everyone before you joined Joel back in your improvised bedroom in the entrance hall.

He was laying down with his elbow over his eyes, resting until you came in. The man knew you, so he knew that you'll ask him about the whole sky bridge incident. - "Hey there, deadman. How are we feeling?" - You asked quietly and put your clothes on the heating of the small room to dry them up before fucking them up again the other day.

"Like a deadman, kiddo." - Joel mumbled back, feeling as your thighs slowly circled his lap as you sat down, running your fingers along his chest for a while before carefully sliding under his t-shirt. It was an obvious sign of care and attention, but you were also looking for another wound or hematoma under his clothes. Although Joel knew what you were doing, he let you do your business. - "I'm just glad I've found you both alive at the tunnel. I was just on my way to the hospital when I saw you in that small loophole beside the main road."

"You wouldn't find much in the hospital, trust me, we took good care of it." - A whisper came out of you as you checked on his upper chest, taking your time with every small move. - "What happened up there? I was running with you and all of a sudden, you left me there." - With that, you climbed down, leaning your back to the wall as you finished the check-up. Joel now put his palms on his chest, looking into the ceiling.

"These Scars ain't that dumb, you see? They knew we'd split up and they realized that I'd be tryin' to save you no matter what. So some went after you and some tried comin' for me. For a moment, I thought I won't get outta there. But they have pretty bad aim." - The man chuckled, turning his head at you. - "And there was another bridge, so I tried walkin' that one because I knew you'll be gone from the other building. I've run into a huge guy on my way, that's this." - Joel pointed the tip of his finger on the small, almost black circle under his eye. - "And ever since then, I was makin' my way to you. No matter what was happenin', I didn't want to stop." - Joel explained and put his palm around your ankle, gently smoothing it with his finger.

"Stop being so cavalierish so much." - A whisper sounded trough the room again as you stretched your leg out again, having his fingers now massaging your thigh. Joel wasn't sure if that was an invitation, but it was all answered when you picked yourself up on your knees and gripped his t-shirt, making him pull up as well. The kiss which you gave him was devastating and brutal in many points of view - but it was the first proper kiss he got since you got to Seattle, so he didn't even think about saying something back.

It was because of Abby and her friends. They were on the back of your head all the fucking time. And now, you were close to finding her. The aquarium. The Seattle aquarium was the place where she was hiding. Each of you was so close to the thing you've come to accomplish in the city. The excitement, the nervosity, and rage made you want only one thing from your man - to fuck it out of you. You didn't care how he's going to do it - if he fucks you on all like a whore, tugging your hair. You didn't care a shitty bit about him slamming you into the floor, choking you with his palm. If Joel would like you to ride him like a horse, you would.

You just wanted all of there things to go away fast and simply - sex was the only thing you saw as the solution. Maybe it would at least make Joel fall asleep while you'd sneak to set on your way again so you'd be sure he'll be safe. Abruptly, you started to undress, tugging on your shirt so violently that you heard at least one of the buttons fly away violently while you felt his palms already palming both your breasts, playing with both your nipples, playfully tugging on them and pulling them out. It looked as if you were on the same page already, which honestly made you go for the kiss even more hastily than before.

When Joel made you lay down onto the space bags, it almost knocked your breath out as you closed your eyes for a second, furrowing at the uneasy feeling in your chest. - "You 'kay?" - The man asked immediately, worried that he had hurt you. - "Just fuck me like a whore, Joel, do it, come on. Please." - And that was all he needed to hear from you. You got exactly what you begged for - no foreplay, harsh, almost bruising touches, hand on your throat, and his pelvis almost crushing yours with the strength of each move he made. There were moments when Joel had to cover your mouth because you forgot how loud could you be at times.

It didn't take too long until he finished, having you aching as he slipped out, putting his sweaty forehead on your chest to listen to your fastened heartbeat. You haven't hit the jackpot, which wasn't even your main intention, so you weren't even disappointed. There was a silence as both of you caught your breath while your fingers brushed his shoulders, dipping into his hair gently as you pulled him even closer. - "I was afraid I won't ever see you again." - You said honestly, so Joel could feel the fear in your voice. In an answer, he snickered, kissing the small spot between your breasts.

"I'm pretty tired, baby girl. Would you, eh..." - The man asked reluctantly, so you nudged his shoulder to make him continue. - "Would you sing me somethin'?" - He breathed out to the skin of your thigh when you pulled your shirt back on, covering him in his sleep bag, letting him snuggle back to you. - "Don't you also wanna make me go for the guitar down there? Do I look like a jukebox to you?" - You hummed back, seemingly denying his request.

It almost looked as if you weren't about to sing for him when you just played with the strands of his hair, putting them from place to place, but suddenly...

"Talking away, and I don't know what I'm to say, but I'll say it anyway," - You started quietly, just humming when there were no words to sing. Joel didn't like it when people didn't sing the right lyrics of the song, but for you, he was willing to make a compromise. Especially when you were singing this song. - "I'll be coming for your love, okay? Take on me, take me on. I'll be gone, in a day or two..." - You sighed and closed your eyes. Your mouth continued with singing the words, but your brain was concentrated on something different. The Seattle aquarium. Abby was in the Seattle aquarium at the very moment you were laying there with Joel against your chest.

You should be empty after your man singlehandedly fucking the living soul out of you - but instead of that, as his breath started to deepen, you were thinking about her. This was a chance you weren't sure that will happen twice in a lifetime. It was just two to three hours from the place of your stay on foot. If you'd catch at least an hour of sleep, you could surprise Abby in the night, maybe hitting her unprepared and vulnerable.

It was pure torture, knowing how close she was now. The more you thought of that, the closer she was. The closer were your hands around her neck, the redemption you came for. During your thinking of Abby, you've managed to fall asleep. And for the first time, you were having a dream that didn't look like a fucking nightmare from the very first moment of its begging. For which, you were very grateful.

Could you be in a place you haven't ever seen? It seemed so because there was the aquarium around you in all its glory. There were fish swimming in the tanks, beautiful underwater plants as far as you could see and the sunlight was shining through the place. Could there even be a place as vibrant as this was? It was serene, almost heavenly unreal.

And Abby was sitting there on a bench, looking into the tanks with a thoughtful look. It seemed that this dream won't even be violent - until the woman got on her feet. It was hard to make out what was she saying. Your brain couldnt recall what her voice sounded like, but it remembered her intonation and the parts when she deepened it. All you could make out was that she was talking about Nora and her other friends. The ones that died by your hand. Abby smashed you to one of the tanks, cracking it open. A small trail of water ran on the glass as you turned back and kicked her knee.

Now you knew that you're not strong enough to go one-on-one with her, but you were also smaller and more agile against this huge, tall woman. Which you had to utilize. It could quite literally save your goddamn life. There was this kind of a dance going on between you for a moment - you tugged her braid, she broke your nose again, you kicked her between her legs and she threw you on your back, almost getting ready to finish you for good. That was until she realized you stole her gun and that you were now pointing at her face.

The woman rose her palms above her hand, backing away from you, pleading you to spare her life. But you shot her nonetheless. Once, twice and then for the final, third time. When you were both laying on the ground, but only one of you was alive, you've expected something to hit you. Something. Anything. A feeling, a thought, a wish, something.

But instead of that, as you walked up to Abby to look at her, there was nothing. You weren't feeling a single thing. Sure, it wasn't a real situation you were in. You had to remember that you're only inside your head while seeing all of it. But no matter what you tried to see on Abby's corpse, no matter what you were digging from the very bottom of yourself, it simply wasn't there. Was this the big victory you've been waiting for? This sure as hell wasn't what you hoped for. This was all you've done for finding Abby coming to the final stop. Were you doing this just to feel empty, almost used, disgusted by everything? What was happening?

Surely, this was your mind trying to send you a message of some kind. But it didn't make any sense to you. The message was surrounded by a mystery that wasn't understandable for you - but it was enough to wake you up. Joel was still dead asleep, laying on your chest and breathing deeply in and out. It couldn't be more than two hours since you've fallen asleep, so it was a perfect time to sneak out of the theatre. But just when you tried to find your way of how to wiggle from under Joel, you realized he maybe wasn't as asleep as you thought he was.

"You can't let it go, can you? Is it so hard to leave it all behind?" - The known, raspy voice asked you and his hand smoothed your hip. Quickly, you gulped and closed your eyes painfully. Why did you have to wake him up? That was a mistake. Now, you had to explain yourself. But he was right, you couldn't let it go even if it most likely meant that Abby will kill you in the aquarium.

If that was to mean that this was your last journey before ending up in the depths of the hell, so be it. If you were about to be killed at the aquarium and if that was meant to be your destiny, so be it. You've deserved whatever was waiting for you inside of there. Death, emptiness, sadness, fear, or hatred, you deserved it for what had you done to the other people. And to ensure you'll get all of it, you made an amend. You were about to kill everyone who would stand in your way to Abby. Whether it was infected, the Scars, or WLF, you didn't care. In the end, the woman will be awaiting you, warned about your arrival long before she'll see you.

"You know the answer, do you have to ask?" - You answered and sat up, smoothing your face. - "I can't sleep at night, Joel. And when I do, she is there to haunt me again and again. Ellie can't put an end to this, neither can Tommy and sure as hell you can't end this. I have to be the one. It has to be me or I'll never find peace, Joel." - With a nod, you assured yourself, feeling cold sweat running down your body as you shifted at the uncomfortable emptiness the dream had brought you. - "No matter what, I'm going to the fucking aquarium. I don't care what you tell me. You can join me if you want, but I don't want you to see any of it. One of us will die inside that building," - You turned your head to Joel, looking him dead in his eyes. - "And whether it will be me or her, you'll just have to accept it."

With that, you picked yourself up to put your clothes on as you thought about your stuff when you saw Joel joining in. - "Are you sure," - "Stop fucking asking me if I'm sure. Stop it already. You cant change a single shit with it." - You hit the wall with your palm, turning your head at the man. - "Are you sure you wanna kill her?" - Joel finished the question no matter how irritated did make you.

"Death doesn't solve anythin', girl. You can kill as many people as you want, but you know who will suffer in the end?" - The man huffed into your face, but he wasn't angry with you. No. He was concerned. - "It will be you. Or her. Or me. Or Ellie. Do you think that if you'd kill her, you'd feel better than how you're feelin' now? Y/N, listen, this ain't how this works, you hear me?" - Joel shook his head as he pulled up his trousers. - "I know that mercy and justice don't live side by side, but you spoke about that cycle of yours. But you know what's this 'bout?" - He asked again, having you shake your head.

"You ain't breakin' the cycle by rushin' to the aquarium in the dark of the nite, listen to me. All this is good for it repeatin' the cycle again. And you know what comes after this? Someone else comes back for revenge. And this time, they won't be lookin' after me, no, they'll be comin' after you. What then? Would you wanna go here again, repeating the same mistake until it would get you killed for real?" - His palms took hold on your shoulders. This was making a lot of sense if you had to be honest. Every word Joel had told you was making sense. But the decision was already made. - "I know what I'm talkin' 'bout, baby girl, listen to me. Let's go back to sleep, wait for the mornin', look for Tommy, and leave home already. This ain't bringin' any good." - Joel begged you. He had a family to protect. You were his family just like Ellie was. And with the situation ruling over Seattle, it was time to just go home - he knew that Abby will get herself killed sooner or later. But when you looked down with that empty gaze and turned away, he had to sigh deeply. How many warning signs did you have to see before turning back?

You were almost done with everything, so you stepped into the hall - just to find Jesse and Ellie already there, both dressed up as well. And you were also the first one to speak. - "Where do you think you're going?" - Your finger pointed at both of them. - "This isn't happening. You're staying here."

"We heard you and Joel arguing..." - Jesse started. - "Again." - Ellie finished for him. - "And honestly, Y/N, he's right. I've had enough of this fuckery. I've seen and done enough bad here. My girlfriend is pregnant with this clown," - She snickered and bumped her elbow into Jesse's side. - "And I have to make sure she's safe. And she ain't safe here at the moment. I have a family to protect." - Ellie sighed and looked Joel into his eyes, finally, even if only partially, understanding what did he mean by that statement.

"It was different when we were on our way here. We didn't know about single thing what is waiting for us here and, look, were honestly lucky to be alive at this point." - "I'm not holding any of you in Seattle." - You answered with a snicker. - "Youre free to pack your things and go home. If you'd like to leave with now, please, go. But I have something to finish here."

"No, Y/N, you're not catching my drift. Let's just... Find Tommy, wrap it up and go home, please." - Your best friend stopped you from your march to the door, catching your elbow in her palm. - "This is going to kill you." - She said honestly, now slowly leaning her forehead to yours as she closed her eyes to take a deep breath in. Slowly, you nodded, putting her palms away. - "I know. But... If you want to find Tommy, you have to go after Abby, that's all I'm saying."

You were the first one to leave the building. It was breaking your heart to hear someone crying inside the theatre before you realized it's Dina. The girl was hugging Ellie, begging her to stay there with her, safe and sound. But Ellie was shaking her eyes, telling her that she can't stay. So Dina made Jesse promise that he'll keep her safe no matter what - even if he'd have to die in the process.

Yet, as soon as you set on your way, you realized there's another obstacle in your way - the entire downtown of Seattle was flooded from the rain which was going on for the last two days. This could complicate a lot, well, that was until you've all heard something, hiding out of the sight of the flashlight. It was a motorboat. Which was as smart as it was unreal - you hadn't seen anything working inside Seattle. No lights, no electricity, no working cars. And suddenly, there was a motorboat. Which could be... - "This is our ticket to the aquarium." - You realized out loud, looking at your friends hiding in the dark.

"And whatcha want to do now? We're going to... Just steal it from them?" - Jesse hissed back at you when you were looking down on the boat which was slowly parking just three floors under you.

"Why would I steal it from them? When they're dead, you can't count it as stealing anymore." - You answered more or less immediately, which had Jesse shook at the words you've said. - "You're about to do what?" - Jesse hissed back again, being horrified by the things that just left your lips. The Y/N he knew would never even joke about this topic of killing someone.

"Jesse, Seattle was hard on each of us." - Ellie answered when she heard your bickering, crawling between you to look down on the boat as well. - "What's the plan of the attack?" - "There isn't any plan of attack! What are you two even talking about? What we are about to do is to tiptoe around these guys and walk to the aquarium." - Jesse tried to intervene, but just when he finished the sentence, a bolt of lightning struck one of the super high skyscrapers and rain which could be described as hell was started, which made you raise your eyebrows.

"You were saying, son?" - You asked, licking your eyebrows when Jesse got out of the hiding, walking back to the shadows. - "This wrong in so many levels, Y/N, I don't wanna do that." - "Then sit here in the shadows and let me and Ellie work it out. We'll do just fine without you." - This wasn't the friend Jesse knew and loved. This person in front of him was someone strange he hadn't met yet.

"Seven-eight? It's three-oh-five, you hear me?" - Each of you shut up when a signal from a walkie talkie hit your ears. At that moment, not even the sharpest eye would spot trespassers at the WLF territory. - "Yeah, I hear you, wassup, Mike?" - A woman answered to the walkie talkie, walking around the small harbor.

"Another trespasser in the harbor... Fuck, I'm sick of this place already. He's shooting our people with a rifle like a maniac. You better move with the loading and head back." - The man answered via the transportable device. Each of you heard the woman's sigh as she tried to straighten the fact inside her head. - "Okay, we'll start loading now. What about the operation, you've heard something 'bout that?" - She asked. The operation was most likely referring to the attack the WLF planned on the Scars, most likely in the cultists' territory.

"It went south in my opinion, dude, I haven't heard from Isaac in hours. We're now stepping to the plan B." - Mike answered quickly and you heard the woman stopped because you could no longer hear her footsteps walking around. - "But, according to plan B, we are to leave Seattle." - The woman answered in a firm voice, not understanding what was going on. And according to the confused looks you gave each other, you didn't understand what was happening either.

"Listen to me. Load the damn crates, we have to regroup in the base - or there will be no more WLF. Over and out, kill." - Mike ended the whole call, leaving the woman in the dark again. But soon, she called out to her friends. - "We need to move it, guys! Isaac has gone MIA." - She clapped her hands and other WLFs, which you could see according to their flashbacks turning around the darkened place, still covered in the night shadows.

"It's Tommy." - Ellie assumed in a quick whisper. - "That Mike guy was talking about Tommy. A trespasser shooting them with a rifle? I mean, come on." - She mumbled. That was great - Tommy was alive, which made you sigh with a small grin. But this wasn't just enough to make you turn around, walking to the harbor. This made Jesse look at you without nothing to say - until he found his words again.

"No, stop. This isn't you. Let's just sneak around and find Tommy. Come on." - Jesse muttered out more like a plea, trying to lead you from the building. To his bad luck, your mind was already set on the boat. And now, after two whole days of your unstopping journey in Abby's steps, there was no way in hell that something like stealing a motorboat from a few guys would stop you. When you shook your head again, Jesse knew that this is a battle that will come in vain. - "You know what? Do what you will, I just don't wanna see this massacre. I'm going after Tommy. Someone going with me?" - Jesse walked from the three of you with his hands above his head. Ellie shook her head as well, getting on her knees to accompany Jesse. - "We'll see each other at the theatre, you hear me?" - Your best friend asked quietly, hugging you with force.

With that, Jesse and Ellie left the building again. Soon, both you and Joel started to do what you were so good at. But this time, it all went downhill - the woman with the walkie talkie noticed you as you were just putting a different body down. Joel walked from behind her, putting his elbow around her neck. - "Not a word, you hear me?" - The man mumbled to her ear, while you seemed to be more or less fascinated with the walkie talkie. Slowly, you came to the woman, who had a fearful expression as she watched every move you made. But the only thing you did was that you turned the walkie talkie on, looking the woman dead in her eyes.

"Three-oh-five? Seven-eight here, you copy?" - You asked, furrowing upon listening to the static. But Mike answered no matter what. - "Emma, I told you not to call me again. Just do what you're told, 'kay? It's already hard enough without you trying to discuss this." - Mike answered shortly after, seemingly starting to be already annoyed. To stop Emma from talking, you put your mouth over her mouth, feeling her wiggling under Joel's arms until she heard the revolver's fuse opening. At that, she stopped again.

"Emma isn't there, Mike. Tell Abby that were on our way." - You finished before tugging the walkie talkie out of her vest, throwing it into the water below. With that, Joel made sure she's unconscious by hitting her temple with the handle of the gun. - "You ready to go?" - A question made Joel come back to you from the trance as you were stepping into the boat. You basically made sure that the WLFs will show up in the building, you invited them over if you had to be honest. So the sooner you'd leave, the bigger chance there was that the won't know who showed up there.

Soon, you were on your way. Joel was driving the boat forward with an expressionless face, feeling the ice-cold rain running on both of you. You, in the meantime, were looking around the whole city center, trying to get your blood off your clothes with a furrow. These days, it was quite quick to have blood spilled all over you, destroying the clothes for good.

Since the sea was raging at the moment, Joel decided not to drive the boat there - instead, you stopped in a small bay just a few yards from the harbor when that aquarium was located. It was less than a ten-minute-lasting walk. Yet the closer you found yourself to the aquarium, the heavier your stomach was feeling. That fucking girl was inside the building, just yards from you. Your whole body felt very excited even if your brain knew how twisted the feeling is. Quickly, you shook your head as you and Joel started to find your way inside.

It didn't take you long to find a big hole in the fence which was delimiting the authorized personnel only area. From that moment, you quickly found a way inside. Soon, you were both kneeling in front of a broken window, from which you could perfectly see inside the empty fish tanks. It was there, right in front of you... So... Why couldn't you move forward? What was holding you back? - "You comin'?" - Joel said, already jumping down inside the building. So you jumped after him into the dark unknown.

Walking through the old, mostly destroyed aquarium was feeling weird. The tanks were emptied out completely without any residents - whether you expect fish, sharks, or lobsters, maybe even jellyfish, none of that was there. You even got a chance to walk through an empty exhibit that still had some water inside of it. There were dead corals on the rocks inside of it and the only thing you could do was to imagine what this aquarium was looking like when it was all good before the outbreak.

After a few minutes of mindless walking around the place, you found an airshaft, which was out of order for a long time. You crawled in first, but before doing that step, you grabbed a pipe laying on the ground. Which, again, reminded you of Abby. You had pipe when you bumped to Abby for the first time. And you were thinking of her every second of crawling through the airshaft full of moose and various other plants which usually grew in a humid environment. But before you could make something out of the thoughts, the construction fell under you. You did your best not to scream, but the mess it made was still loud enough. Slowly, you tried to pick yourself up from the ground when you stopped.

It wasn't even stopping - you just froze when you realized that you're hearing violent growling. Slowly, you rose up eyes, watching a German shepherd slowly walking towards you with its teeth stuck out as it growled at you, watching you with its eyes. Its tail was pulled between its legs. Even someone who had never seen an aggressive dog could tell that this animal was about to attack. When it charged against you, all you did was that you pressed your pipe into its chest, trying to keep the animal at least a bit away from your face.

It was strange - the dog was making all kinds of weird, crazy scary sounds, but it wasn't barking. Sure, you had far worse problems at the moment, but this was actually a good sign. Whether Abby or someone else was there, the dog wasn't about to alert them, because just when it spilled their saliva all over your face, Joel pushed a knife into its neck. His palm turned it around to make sure the animal won't attack you anymore. Then, he pulled the knife out and pushed the dead animal's body laying on the ground.

"Jesus..." - Joel kneeled to the animal, watching its twitching eyes and muscles while he slowly ran his palm in its fur. The man in front of you was an animal lover. Sure, he would choose you over any aggressive animal, but it wasn't making him easy killing one. - "I never knew I will sink so damn low to kill pets." - Joel sighed and pulled back on his legs, while you bowed to the corpse as well.

"This isn't a pet, Joel. WLFs are keeping these animals against trespassers and infected. If you wouldn't be here, this dog would definitely kill me. And this one was... Alice." - You mumbled upon reading the dog tag, kneeling down as well to at least close the dog's eyes. Sure, you and Ellie met some dogs before, but you've never killed any of them since you were too afraid to even get close to them. But it was apparent that Alice is more than a killing machine. This dog was domesticated as well as it was used for the hunt.

"You should see this, baby girl." - Joel told you quietly as soon as you walked into the next room. This was a surgeon room with the metal operating table, presumably used for the sigh and other animals before the outbreak. But the blooded pads and compressing bandages just like the alcohol smelling throughout the whole room told you that the room was used recently. There were needles and thin stitched laying around, but when you looked into the freezer, your stomach kicked so bad that you almost puked, immediately walking away from it.

Joel took one good look as well - and even his stomach had kicked upon seeing a human arm laying between the ice. It wasn't naturally toned - the skin, even if it was already starting to rot, was as red as a tomato. - "Do you think that... When there's the arm... They ate the rest of them?" - A mumble left you while you stilled tried not to throw up. Listen, you've murdered enough people to know that you're a bad person. But never ever would you consider eating a human being. No. That was a taboo.

Just when the man was about to answer, you heard two voices coming from a distance. A man and a woman were arguing in a different part of the building, which made you exchange a quick glance before walking to the sources. With a gulp, you walked through the maze - bumping into the room the people slept in, into their improvised kitchen, dressing room, and bathroom. You walked around the place until you heard the voices clearly even if the people were just talking. Slowly, you stopped Joel from going there first.

"Stay there, okay?" - You whispered and spoke out sooner than Joel answered back. - "We need the benefit of surprise. I'll go first and when they'll be suspecting the least, you will follow, yeah?" - Gently, you put your palm on the man's cheek, nodding at him. It was a smart plan, actually. So Joel watched as you turned on your heels and more or less sneaked towards the door. A beam of light was coming through the small gap and you could see two people talking inside a big hall with a whole model of a whale hanging from the ceiling.

It was so close now you could feel it on your fingerprints. You couldn't tell if the woman figure was Abby - you didn't saw her whole body, you could barely remember her voice, you didn't know if the woman was the one you were searching for. One last time, you made sure that you're holding the pipe tight before you pushed the door open, walking into the hall, having both the people looking at you.

And soon, thanks to Joel, two human lives were spared that night. But at the moment, you just watched the two people looking at you cluelessly.

[missingmywing]

Let Us Embrace Whatever It May Bring

@boomchickfanfiction this was inspired largely because I randomly remembered your 30-day challenge, went back to reread them, and rediscover your D&D au. And then got seriously inspired by the remake because I’ve got this colossal D&D universe that I’ve never written or posted anything for. Which is a shame.

So, thanks for reinspiring me!

(Potential spoilers for FFVIIR)

(Link to headcanon post on this; here!)

. . . . .

“They’re going to be so confused.”

“Of course they are, that’s what makes it fun!”

“Cloud is going to hate us.”

“Oh, he is not. Admit it, he’s going to be so excited to bring back the goofy try-hard jackass from the original story. He’s been irritated at what Strife’s slowly turned into across the multiverse, all because he actually payed attention in Intro to Psychology and accidentally took the “play to reality” character type a bit too literally. A hard reset is exactly what he needs, bonus points when he realizes where we’re going with this.”

“Which, hopefully, won’t be until the end of the first part of the campaign.” Sephiroth sent Aerith a pointed look. “We’ll have to be careful not to give them too much to work with too soon.”

“Tell that to the DMs,” she shot back, nudging her cousin with a grin. “Who’s heading it this time? Angeal was the main one last time, even with your parents helping him out, but are we going back to that?”

“Time travel isn’t Angeal’s usual forte,” Sephiroth conceded, “but that adventure was very much his. I’m not willing to take that from him unless he’s an actual player this time. Which, considering where we’re starting the timeline, he can’t be. Not with his own character, at least.”

“That is true,” she sighed, leaning back in her chair to stretch. “I definitely agree; it was his and he really owned it. I know Auntie was super impressed.”

“Yes, yes, mother is very supportive of dragging people into nerdom. It’s why she and Gen get along so well.”

“And that they share a nickname?” she grinned.

He rolled his eyes with a sigh. “That too. So, how are we going to pitch this without arousing suspicion?”

“‘Hey, why don’t we see if we can keep Aerith alive this time?’”

He sent her a deeply unimpressed look.

“I know it may come as a shock, but the world doesn’t actually revolve around you, y’know.”

“This one does!” she shot back with a brilliant grin. “Now help me figure out how to set this up so no one realises that we’re literally resetting the timeline.”

. . .

“Hot damn we actually got everyone here,” Barret looked around, impressed, at the barely-contained chaos of people reuniting, getting food and drinks, and discussing storylines.

“I didn’t actually expect everyone to show up when I sent out that message,” Aerith admitted. “I mean, I did send out the call for Avalanche specifically, even if everyone was invited.”

“What, ya’ thought we wouldn’t show up to a new campaign for this story?” Reno asked with a grin, slinging an arm over her shoulders. “Everyone shows up for the first and final sessions, even if they don’t participate. C’mon Aer, this is our baby. We all wanna know what new adventure awaits us on the distant land of Gaia.”

“Yeah, who’s getting possessed this time?!” Zack called across the room with a grin. “Do I finally get to come back to life for good? Does Cloud finally die for good? Do he and Seph finally bone in-game?!”

“No, that was Dissidia,” Cloud corrected with a grin, and laughter rang through the rooms.

“Oh boy, that campaign,” Genesis grinned, elbowing Sephiroth.

“You weren’t even there,” Sephiroth protested, elbowing him back with a smile.

Angeal shook his head from where he and Jenova were setting up the table. “That’s what you get for live-streaming it.”

“It was a fantastic campaign,” Jenova assured them. “Full kudos to your DMs, they did a fantastic job juggling everything and showing how young their gods were last time, especially in comparison to Cosmos and Chaos from the first two campaigns. And all from behind the anonymity of a computer and avatar.”

Sephiroth narrowed his eyes at her, and she winked at him. She preferred to stay anonymous in the wider campaigns like that; it preserved her character’s image.

“It was fun,” Cloud admitted, “even if it was chaotic. And speaking of fun and chaotic, is everyone here?”

“Role call!” Jenova shouted through the house. “DM’s to the floor prompto! Avalanche and evil people, to the table! Everyone else, spread out and stay out from underfoot!”

There were chuckles and laughter as people called out jibes and protests toward their treatment, but everyone gathered just the same. With some subtle prompting from the DMs and two schemers, the people from the Midgar section of the Meteor campaign were settled closest to the DMs, Shinra (Rufus, the Turks, and Reeve) on one side and Avalanche on the other, and Aerith managed to snag Zack into sitting next to her. At his raised eyebrow she winked.

Angeal cleared his throat, and it fell quiet.

“You all have your intro Meteor sheets, right?” He glanced around, and everyone nodded. “Right, get those out and let's get some stat comparing for this campaign.”

That raised a few brows and murmurs, but the rustling of bags and binders and papers soon filled the room.

Sephiroth was careful to hide his endgame Advent Children campaign sheet behind his intro Meteor one. No reason to give anyone ideas at this stage. The anticipation and confusion would be so much more fun if they were all kept in the dark.

His eyes met Aerith’s, and she looked just as excited as he felt.

They took a few minutes to minorly rework the sheets to better suit their play style now, but the changes wouldn’t be major enough to impede the story. Good.

Jenova clapped twice, Lucrecia and Vincent finished tidying up the papers, Hojo spread out the stat sheets, and Angeal once again cleared his throat.

“Imagine, if you will, a sky. Filled with clouds, oversetting a dusty plain with rocky hills. A bird flies overhead, feathers dark and scraggly. It soars through the sky, over the plains, toward a large mass of metal plunging into the sky.”

Angeal had the perfect voice for narration, everyone was hooked from the first sentence, and there were shifts of excitement at the mention of the ruins of Midgar.

“Carried up by the wind, if flies into a cloudbank, navigating through large metal beams and poles. With a burst of sunlight, it emerges on the other side- overtop of a thriving metropolis.”

There was a burst of noise at that. Gasps and shouts of surprise at the realization that these weren’t ruins, and it probably wasn’t Edge.

Jenova called for quiet, and all the DMs looked amused.

“So what, we doin’ a time-skip?” Cid raised a brow.

“No, that doesn’t make sense.” Elena dug through her notes. “In the AC campaign it opened with a five hundred year time-skip and Midgar was a jungle, remember?”

“Yep, Nanaki and his cubs were overlooking it,” Kunsel confirmed, pulling out the concept sheet he’d sketched out at the time, as well as the character sheet he hadn’t yet gotten to use. Apparently he wouldn’t get to use it this campaign either. Darn. He had tons of cool stuff Nanaki had learned over those five hundred years.

“That doesn’t necessarily mean that we didn’t time skip,” Rufus pointed out. “It just means that we’re before it was reclaimed by the Planet. It could be a two or three hundred year time skip, and we’re descendents. A city could easily be totally reclaimed in a hundred years or less.

“Or,” Cloud cut in, “we could just wait and see what nefarious plot our DMs have in store.”

“I just got done with the Number 3 campaign with the KH crew, so I know what my theory is,” Reno drawled, drawing snickers from everyone who followed that particular convolution.

Aerith giggled, and tried not to do it too hard. Reno would be the first to figure it out, solely due to the central part he played as Axel in that particular campaign with that group. He’d keep quiet though, just to see how long it took everyone else.

Angeal smiled at them, but continued. “It flies over the train tracks, the cars on freeways, and down between buildings in what appears to be an entertainment district. Children on bikes ride down the street, past construction crews and people loading fuel cells into cars, shoppers entering and exiting shops along the street, and cars making their way along the road. The children ride down a hill, across a road, and reach a playground with a few toys… and a strangely shaped slide.”

Cloud stilled, suspicion arising in his eyes, and Aerith and Sephiroth bit back smiles.

“Day fades to evening, to night, and as the young girl slides down, something catches her eye in the distance. She turns to looks, and watches as a large burst of green erupts from a distant building along the giant outer wall.”

More and more people were beginning to realize, and Reeve looked breathless at the description of something he’d labored at for weeks alongside Jenova, Lucrecia, Hojo, and Vincent to make somewhat realistically believable for his first campaign with them. He was blindly groping in his bag for the sketches and blueprints he’d rendered out on his own.

“Imagine, the sparks of green float up and up, into the cloudy sky, until they resemble stars- and now imagine drifting through them, through the emptiness of space-”

Oh, Cloud knew this. He remembered this from their first Meteor session. Their introduction to the fully realized Midgar, at the introduction of Reeve to their group. And, judging by other people’s reactions, he wasn’t the only one.

“Holy shit,” Barret breathed from beside him, and an incredulous grin was slowly spreading across Zack’s face, while Tifa looked torn between excitement and horror.

“Imagine floating down, down, until buildings take shape. An alleyway, and in the alleyway is a girl. Long, flowing brown hair, with a pink dress, red jacket, and pink ribbon in her braid. Her green eyes are focused on an opening from which the sparks are floating out of; as though she is receiving answers to questions only she would know to ask.”

There was silence for a moment, and Aerith counted down the moments in her head. Three, two, one-

The room exploded into chaos. People were shouting, throwing out questions and theories, laughter and horror in equal bounds on people’s faces.

“Yes!!! Oh yeah, Wedge is back baby!” Zack’s gleeful shout was the most obvious, drawing laughter and groans of protest in equal measure at the reminder of Barret’s Avalanche cell.

“Are we reworking Meteor?!” Elena looked ecstatic. “Because there is so much I want to rework with my fighting style! I have some nifty new spells that I want to try against a bigger level gap!”

“Oh noooo,” Reno groaned, dropping his head back. “I’m gonna go back to bein’ the guy who dropped the plate. Not cool, yo! I finally made everyone forget about that by bein’ a quirky idiot in AC!”

“Ha!” Yuffie grinned. “We’re never gonna let it die!”

Sephiroth focused on Cloud. “You seem conflicted.”

Cloud started, then grinned ruefully at him. “I am, a bit. I’m ecstatic to come back of course, to get Strife back before I put too much realism into his reactions, to completely rework him from the ground up. I mean, this was my first campaign as a major player the whole way through. I’m thrilled. I just also happen to remember all the horrible things that happened to turn Strife into sir angst-fest that he was.”

“Perhaps,” Sephiroth acknowledged, “but if we’re reworking it… then doesn’t that mean that you can change things this time around?”

Cloud sent him a flat look, though his eyes were warm. “I’m not naive enough to think it’s that simple. Between you and the DMs, this won’t go smoothly at all.”

Sephiroth smirked at him, that damn smirk that got to him every time. “Perhaps,” he repeated in a purr, “but isn’t that the fun of it all?”

“Alright children, settle down!” Jenova shouted, but her wild grin showed her true feelings on the matter. “Yes, to answer the question… we are, in fact, reworking Meteor. For a couple of reasons, but mostly… yeah, character development was a large part of it. A couple of people backed themselves into a corner with their characterizations, and needed a sort of… reset.”

Cloud winced, his own feelings being the most well known on the matter. “Oops,” he said weakly.

“It’s not just you,” Lucrecia assured him. “Vincent and I need to rework ours too, because Dirge wasn’t… hmm.”

“I need a character alteration,” Vincent said flatly. “I didn’t like how I played some of that, and would like to have come to some of those conclusions earlier, because some of my lack of action felt a bit too forced and I would like to see if I can smooth it out.”

Yuffie frowned. “What was wrong with it?”

“Essentially the same problem as Cloud, I took the after effects too seriously and made my character more depressed and stagnant than necessary. I’ll see if I can tone it down a bit, or at least form it into a slightly more active shape earlier.”

“And my entire character needs to just be completely reworked,” Lucrecia sighed. “Granted I use character very loosely, because she’s basically just an NPC, and since we based this whole thing on one of our high school campaigns, I am very annoyed with what I turned her into.”

“You turned her into that because she annoyed you and you didn’t like her anymore,” Hojo pointed out dryly.

“I know, but I’m hoping I might be able to fix it.”

“Hashtag-doubt,” Jenova murmured. “I, for one, am perfectly happy with my character.”

“You would be,” Sephiroth said dryly.

“And you aren’t, darling?”

“No, I am,” he assured her. “Just reminding you of your own nature.”

Murmured conversations broke out as people reevaluated their character sheets, considering possible changes. Cloud noticed Rufus, digging out a familiar pet-sheet and quickly scratching out the name up top, and snorted. A glance around revealed Zack gleefully revising Wedge’s sheet, While Jenova and Angeal already had Jessie and Bigg’s revised sheets out in front of them.

Reeve was considering his own three sheets, clearly calculating stats, as was Kunsel. He caught sight of Reno’s sheet just as Angeal called- “This isn’t Kingdom Hearts, Reno, you cannot pull Axel’s stats over to your Turk, he isn’t Lea.”

“Lameee,” Reno groaned, but put the sheet up well naturedly.

“They don’t even use the same element,” Tifa pointed out with amusement, her own sheet done with few revisions.

“Meh,” he shrugged, glancing over. “Not gonna revise stats, Tseng, Rude?”

“A few a bit later, perhaps,” Tseng responded distractedly as he flipped through his later sheets. “As of right now, however, no. I’m content until I can unlock a few higher-tier spell combinations.”

Rude nodded. “Same here. I know what I want to change, but I need higher levels first.”

Barret was grumbling along with Cid about potential mechanics later on, and Cloud turned his attention back to Genesis and Angeal bickering lightly about Scarlet’s potential and materia abilities. He shook his head with a smile, and waited for everyone to finish up.

Angeal cleared his throat once again, calling for silence, and continued.

“Long, flowing brown hair, with a pink dress, red jacket, and pink ribbon in her braid. Her green eyes are focused on an opening from which the sparks are floating out of; as though she is receiving answers to questions only she would know to ask. She starts, suddenly, as though breaking out of a daze, and straightens with a nervous glance around, as though looking for something. Nothing appears, but she quickly stands and hurries out of the alley, glancing over her shoulder as she does. She stumbles into someone, and drops some of her flowers, in her distraction. Quickly kneeling to pick them up, she collects all but one before a man carrying a box and thus can’t see it, steps on it. She slowly picks it up, cradling it in her hands, before her gaze is inexplicably drawn to the sky.”

Angeal to a breath, and continued.

“Pulling away from her, up and into the very sky she’s observing, see the building, lit brightly against the dark, theaters and shops and restaurants; further up and see the city take shape, enormous metal plates with large gaps between them, and at the center… at the center is a tower. Looming over the entire city with an ominous presence, it oversees all that goes on in the city.

Now we go down, down past the other side of the tower, down to Sector 1. A train flies along the rail, a delivery for Mako Reactor Zero. And atop that train is a young man. Blond flyaway hair and a modified SOLDIER uniform, a large sword attached to his back. As the train slows, he looks up, glowing blue-green eyes steely with determination. The train pulls to a stop in the station, and two guards separate to do an inspection.”

Angeal smiled.

“Roll for initiative.”

. . . . .

[iscariotsdeputy]

Analyzing Staci Pratt’s Character Arc

    Julian Bailey once said, on February 13th, 2019:  “Yeah, Staci has a real character “arc” and he’s way more complex than he lets on at the beginning…”. And I, Sam, your local Staci Pratt enthusiast, am here to explain why Staci is a deeper character than everyone’s favorite douchebag son. Now, you may look at me and say, “Sam, you dumbass, it simply ain’t that deep.”, to which I say you are completely valid, but you can and should bear with me here for a second. And yeah, you can reblog this if you wish.

    Far Cry 5 opens in the small, backwoods locale of Hope County, a completely fictional place in Montana that’s actually inspired by southern Montana. Early on, it’s set up that there’s this heavily armed religious group that has taken roots in Hope County. And guess what? The cops are doing absolutely nothing about it. That is, until one fateful 2:37 AM. The Hope County Sheriff’s Department and one U.S. Marshal have decided to finally arrest Joseph Seed on the suspicion of kidnapping with the intent to harm.

    Now, as you sit in the back of the chopper with Sheriff Earl Whitehorse and U.S. Marshal Cameron Burke, two Deputies sit up front, flying the ‘copter and pressing buttons like it’s nobody’s business. Their names are Joey Hudson and Staci Pratt, for the intents and purposes of this post, I will be focusing on Staci Pratt.

    Not much is known about Staci Pratt pre-game, except for the fact that an NPC says “Deputy Pratt always came off as a bit of a douchebag, but that doesn’t mean he deserves what Jacob’s doin’ to him”. Throughout the first cutscene, you can occasionally hear some wise cracks from Staci, and although less noticeable, Staci does mess around with Joey up front, offering her his flask and whatnot. Now, Staci’s wise cracks come in the form of hazing the Rookie Deputy (“Maybe we shoulda brought Nancy along with us instead of the Probie. These Peggies wouldn’t fuck with her”) or disrespecting Joseph Seed (“Crazy motherfucker”).

    If you think that Staci calling Joseph crazy is the only time Staci is disrespectful to his elders, you’d be incredibly wrong. Now, it’s not exactly “disrespectful”, but it shows a moment of doubt that Staci has towards the orders of Sheriff Whitehorse. When Whitehorse tells Staci to set down the helicopter, Staci does nothing at first. He just keeps the helicopter completely still and doesn’t move it. He’s completely silent too. Staci does nothing until Whitehorse says “Pratt” and Staci quickly says “Roger that”, like he was snapped out of a thought. So, this is where we set up Staci’s character arc:

    Confusion. Staci’s character arc is moral confusion and also confusion of one’s identity. As of right now, let me quickly state who Staci is: A guy who’s a bit of a douchebag and he doesn’t believe in a word that Joseph says.

    Let’s fast forward to when the Rook eventually goes to the Whitetail Mountains. When you reach these mountains, more often than not, you will hear THIS BROADCAST before you see Staci again. Now, you may say, “Sam, he could’ve just been reading this”. And yeah, definitely, he was reading. The way he stumbles through it and says it so blankly is a very obvious way to say “Yup, that’s false emotion”. So, if I were to put it on a timeline, this had to have been recorded when Staci was first taken in. Maybe within the first week or so of his capture. But, something I didn’t realize at first when I listened to it. Basically, the whole time, it sounds rehearsed. It sounds faked. It sounds like Staci had a gun to his head. But then get to the end. Around 1:10. Please listen close to when Staci says the phrase “Train, Kill, Sacrifice in the name of The Father and The Project at Eden’s Gate”. You hear him, right? Suddenly, he lights up. Suddenly his voice is more gruff, more emotional, more angry. Those cue words, that phrase, and Staci is there again. No stammer. No blank slate. Those are words that Staci believes in.

    So, no matter if he doesn’t believe in Joseph normally, as soon as he hits those cue words, his heart is into whatever’s conditioned along with it.

    While you’re running around the Whitetails, you’ll hear some NPCs talk about Staci.

My favorite thing is that a few people say “Friends might not be friends after Jacob’s done with ‘em.”, “He might never come out of it. The very least he’ll never be the same guy he was before. Not ever.”, “There’s not much of the old Deputy Pratt left. Jacob made sure of it.”

    Alright folks, now we’re at the first time you see Staci in person again. Actually, it’s entirely possible from this clip that Staci is the one who carried your sorry butt to get conditioned. Now, it’s harder to notice because Jacob Seed may believe in culling the weak, but he doesn’t believe in proper lighting: Staci has scars. Staci is roughed up. He went from THIS to THIS. That is the reverse of a glow up. That’s a blow up. In this scene, Staci gets one line: “You shouldn’t’ve come for me. You should’ve run.” Also, the minute Jacob shows up, Staci literally runs to get in his spot. He runs to the back, gets out of Jacob’s way, and just stands there. So, in the time that Jacob has gotten his hands on Staci, our douchebag Deputy has suffered some major wounds to his pride. Believes both Rook and Him were both better off by leaving Staci in the mountains.

    BUT HEY HE GETS MORE LINES IN THE CONDITIONING SEQUENCES HA HA GOD I’M IN PAIN.

    Hey, hello there, welcome to the Time Break (Part I). What’s the Time Break, you ask? This is where I shamelessly yell about Staci’s voice lines because some of them don’t really fit into a specific point in time (You hear them after you free Stace, but these are just like “hey fun fact Jacob eats a kitkat bar the wrong way i wanna die” reminiscing things) , but they really just reveal facts about Staci’s mental state. Hint: It’s not good.

“Jacob took me on one of his hunts. Only we weren’t huntin’ any animals. A couple of prisoners had escaped. They didn’t get far.” FROM THIS AUDIO

Can I point out how at the end of this line, Staci laughs a lil bit? His voice lightens like he’s amused.

Also, Jacob took Staci on a hunt. It sounds like it was just the two of them hunting people down. I feel like it was a way to “”””reward”””” Staci and get him more chill with pulling the trigger on helpless prisoners.

“I had to help round up the wolves. Y’know, to be made into Judges. They were so scared. So scared.” SAME AUDIO AS ABOVE

This is fairly self explanatory, but yeah, this poor man had to round up scared, whining wolves and lead them to their deaths, essentially.

“I had a dream once that Jacob took me on a hunt. We shot some deer and he asked me to skin ‘em. As I was cuttin’ them open, they changed. It wasn’t deer. I...I don’t think it was a dream.” THIS AUDIO

STACI PRATT HAS SKINNED A HUMAN BEING A HUMAN PERSON A REAL ASS PERSON NOT A DREAM LITERALLY SKINNED A PERSON ALIVE Okay, in all seriousness, I believe Staci was going through his conditioning, which is why they changed. Or, worse, Staci hallucinated it in order to justify his behavior. Either way, Jacob Seed stood and watched as Staci skinned somebody alive under the pretense that he was just skinning a deer.

Finally, here’s Staci singing Only You   

    Hey there, buddy. Welcome back from The Time Break. Now, let’s keep moving right along through Staci Pratt’s suffering to the next cutscene, again, this is a one line scene. It’s when Joseph comes to speak with Rook about sacrifices and Rook wakes up to hear Staci “They want you to be strong. One of you will be strong.” And once again, Staci finds himself interrupted by Jacob and as soon as Jacob gets there, Staci moves to stand right in Jacob’s line of sight. First he stands on the right of Jacob, but when Jacob turns, Staci rushes to be on Jacob’s left so Jacob can still see him.

    Now, let’s go to the next scene where Staci has no lines, but he’s there so let me analyze those body expressions and movements. Pardon my French, but Staci is doing his fucking best here. Like, poor dude has to rush to give Rook their mystery meat and then has to shave Jacob’s beard, then washes Jacob’s hands, and then hands the canteen over to Jacob. The most interesting thing here is the whole shaving nonsense because Staci has a literal knife to Jacob’s throat. Staci has a knife, right there, and he doesn’t slit Jacob’s throat open. He doesn’t kill Jacob, even though he has a very good opportunity. Why? The poor bastard was conditioned to believe that without Jacob, he had no purpose. Jacob is the leader. Jacob is strong. Staci can’t do it. Staci is subservient to Jacob in every way. So no, Staci isn’t going to kill Jacob. Staci is lost without Jacob.

    Are you guys ready to commit treason? STACI SURE IS. BUT FUN FACT, I WHOLEHEARTEDLY DON’T THINK STACI THOUGHT OF IT HIMSELF. Let me run through the whole scenario real quick. Staci sneaks out, avoids the guards, goes to Rook, frees Rook, tries to warn Rook about their conditioning, and then shoves Rook onto the truck to free them. Staci thinks he’s being a hero. Staci thinks he’s doing something on his own, but he’s not. Now, why do I think Staci didn’t think of this himself? Because Staci said it himself.

    He (Jacob) gets in your head.

    Now, please tell me, how Staci would evade capture? He yelled at another prisoner that they weren’t strong. He alerted the Judges there because they started barking when Staci freed Rook. Also, it’s funny how there are no guards out there in the cage area. Nobody watching the prisoners. And how there were no guards that caught Staci and Rook on the way up to Jacob’s office. And that Jacob wasn’t in his office. And that there is a bag of weapons there that anyone would have noticed. Jacob sees everything, we learned this early on. He has security cameras everywhere, just like Eli. Anything Staci did, Jacob or a guard would have noticed. And yet, the alarm finally sounds off just as Rook is about freed. And when you wake up, the truck is all abandoned in the middle of nowhere. Staci was set up. Jacob orchestrated that and let Staci run through the motions.

    It was a test. And Staci failed. Staci was weak and traitorous. And we all know what happens to our traitor…

    He’s strapped to a chair. He’s publicly humiliated on TV. He’s strapped to a chair in a cold, wet, dark bunker. He is left to die. He will starve and dehydrate. He will rot. When he passes, his body will get thrown to the wolves. And the video ends with Staci crying to help. And guess what?

    When you find Staci again. It turns out that he has been listening to that video for days, it has to be less than 7 because he would have dehydrated by then, most definitely. Imagine if you were in his spot. Imagine if you were left to die and all you got to listen to was a video of you being called weak and traitorous, and then you crying for help and crying for Jacob to not leave you there. It’s awful. It’s horrendous. And it leads to a major change in Staci Pratt.

    When you meet again, Staci says the line, “Rook, are you real?”. This indicates that Staci had been sitting down there, having hallucinations about Rook and other people. When you free him, he falls to the ground. When he gets up, he says that he was weak. He says that maybe he deserved to die, to starve, to be stuck down there. Then, he takes a sledgehammer, and surprisingly after starvation and dehydration, through that sheer adrenaline and strength, he takes that hammer and smashes everything in sight. Then he takes a gun, says he’s strong and that the people who made him strong are now weak. And that they must be culled.

    WOW THAT’S BAD, HUH?

    YOU KNOW WHAT THIS CALLS FOR?

    Welcome to Time Break (Part II). Now, we’re going to see some of Staci’s lines that happen after you free him and get him to the Wolf’s Den.

“We could’ve died. We could’ve died. And maybe..Maybe I deserved--NO, NO, STOP STOP! The weak! The weak must be culled!”

“Maybe we didn’t survive that crash. Maybe all this is purgatory. We have to atone for all the shit we’ve done before we can leave this place. We have to suffer before God will grant us salvation.”

“Train, hunt, kill, sacrifice.”

“I can’t take it anymore.”

“Jacob. His experiments. He takes us. Owns us. Speaks to us. He hears us.” THIS AND ALL ABOVE IT IS THIS AUDIO

“He was right! He was right! I knew it! I fucking knew it! Shit, Jesus, help us…”

“Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread; and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us; and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.” 

“Hail Mary, full of grace. The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death, Amen.” (This happens when the bombs go off)

“It’s just gonna get harder. They want an offering. A Sacrifice.”

“I’m trying. I’m trying my best, you have to know that.”

“The whole time I was locked in that room I just kept thinkin’ about how I got here. Y’know why I became a cop…To get laid! That was it! It was a whim! And then after a while I tried to convince myself that I did it for the “greater good”. To help people. But I can’t. I know that now. Jacob taught me that.”

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do anymore. I don’t even know who I am.”

“I...I don’t know what we’re supposed to do now. Protect and serve? Out here? There’s no law anymore, Rook. Look around! Someone shoulda been here by now! Nobody gives a shit about what’s happenin’ here. We’re on our own. Survival of the fittest. The weak and the strong.”   ALL OF THAT WAS THIS AUDIO

If you resuscitate Staci, he says “You’re like my Guardian Angel!” 

Alternatively, if Staci’s in pain, he’ll beg The Father to stop his pain.

“This place...do you know what it is? A protector from what’s to come. But it isn’t inevitable. He said to me that you could stop it. But only you, Rook...Only you...But if you don’t...if you don’t listen...if you don’t...We’re all gonna die. Either down here or up there. It won’t matter. We can’t stop it...The Father...He sees what’s coming...He’s right…” FROM HERE

“Nobody’s gonna take anything from me again. Ever.”

“You see that, Jacob?! Who’s weak now?!”

“I’m alive, but I’m weak...weak. Need to be strong. We are meat. We are all meat.”

Also here are four fun videos of what happens when you initiate combat with Staci Pratt: ONE    TWO   THREE   FOUR

    Now that we’re free from the final Time Break, let’s talk about the end of the game. First things first, let's talk about the common factor between the two endings, the confrontation with Joseph. This is when Rook turns and sees Joey and Staci forced down on their knees with guns to their heads. Joseph says that you can go in peace and there’s this exchange between Joey and Staci Joey: Go in peace? You’re fucking insane. Staci: Is he? We never should’ve been here in the first place.

    Then, in the Resist Ending, as he sits in the back of the car, Staci screams a Hail Mary and then he yells about how Jospeh was right. How Joseph was fucking right. Also, Staci is sitting right by Joseph as he screams that all, so you know Joseph hears him.

    Now, to the Walk Away Ending, as soon as they’re let go, Staci is shaking as he gets up and has his hands up to show he isn’t a threat. His back is hunched and he makes himself look small and he’s literally shaking like a leaf. Joey and Earl fight and he rushes to get in the truck. Staci sits in the back with his hands in his lap and staring at the floor. He stays silent until Whitehorse brings up coming back and fighting again. And all he does is say “No. No way. I’m not gonna be a part of this. You heard what he said.”

    I’ve enjoyed the time we’ve spent together, I really do, but I’ve realized that I seriously need to come to a conclusion here. So, let’s go back to where this all began. We started with Staci Pratt, the douchebag cop who had wiseass remarks to every situation. Though Far Cry 5 follows the arc of a young, Rookie cop who faces something they were never prepared for, there is an arc to Staci Pratt’s character and it’s a path of confusion and not knowing who he is or where he belongs anymore.

    One of the first things Staci does is insult Joseph, and by the end of this story, Staci Pratt believes in Joseph Seed and the Project and culling the weak. Staci’s character arc is so much breaking and breaking and breaking and then being rebuilt in the visage of the Project. In an essence, Staci develops and destroys himself at the same time. Pardon me for a pun, but Staci Pratt is a far cry of the man he once was. As Whitehorse and Joey still fight for the Resistance and loathe Joseph, the same cannot be said with Staci.

    He believes is Joseph, but all of his friends are in the Resistance. He is every single one of Jacob’s lessons, beliefs, manifestos, plans, all shoved into one person. He is a living legacy of the man who orchestrated Eli’s murder and yet he’s sitting there in the Wolf’s Den. And yet, he was treated like shit in the Mountains. He was treated as lesser. Even, throughout this all, Staci’s belonging is a topic that really has no proper place.

    When Jacob Seed said that Staci would die in the bunker, he wasn’t wrong.

    The old Staci Pratt died a long time ago, and now there’s a new man living in his place.

[kineticallyanywhere]

Timetravel au where the RWBY+JRN+Oscar end up back in time during the start of the series and they all have to lay low pretending to be their past selves so they won't get caught but they sometimes get confused which version of someone they're talking to like Blake would be trying to act like her season 1 self and Ruby's just like 'blake it's me' 'oh thank god' but it's really hard for them to see everything back when it was peaceful and JNR has a hard time seeing pyrrha alive 1/2

2/2 but eventually they decide they have to warn people about Cinder so they go to Ozpin and then there's the adults like Ironwood all making a big fuss about what they should do and if they should believe the kids meanwhile Oz is kinda eying Oscar because he knows Oscar is his next incarnation &this is the first time he's known who his next incarnation is going to be which means he can prepare like never before but Oscar's like 'no I know what you're doing you want to kidnap past me stop it' 

RWBY Time travel anon here, 1. Please consider Oscar meeting Ozpin and finally having someone understand what it's like to be an incarnation of Ozma& having someone able to teach him and get rid of some misconceptions he has 2 Please also consider past Oscar waking up on his farm one day only to have all these really important huntresses and huntsmen trying to get him to join a hunter school, Ironwood& Crow are fighting over custody of Ozs next incarnation &past Oscar is like 'wtf is happening?'

This was all I thought about at work today please accept this offering of a scribble

MORE THOUGHTS:

I love the image of them all trying to be able to pass as the people they were just two years ago

Blake spacing out and Ruby coming over, like you said

Ruby: Hey Blake, whatcha doin?

Blake: U-UH-- BROODING!

Ruby: Blake it’s me, chill

Blake: ohthankgods

Oscar seeing Vale for the first time! 

Oscar: Beacon is so cool whoever designed this place I wanna shake their hand

Nora, to Ren: Wouldn’t he just shake his own hand?

Ren elbows her

I’m thinking alt/disconnected timeline. A universe that’s almost identical to theirs (maybe the phone numbers are different, or Blake’s ears are a different color) but it’s not. So they don’t have to worry about paradoxing themselves out of existence and they can change things here 

They def don’t know that for sure at first tho. can’t pass up all the Shenanigans for initially trying really hard to not break time

for example: JNR+O are going around Vale, looking for something, but turns out JNR don’t remember the area as well as they should. 

Oscar: Why don’t we just ask somebody? That person looks nice!

Oscar goes to talk to them, JNR about jump out of their clothes to duck and hide

Oscar meets Pyrrha. She gives him directions based on her teammate Nora’s favorite ice cream place

Weiss has to hear herself talk, it’s amazing

Ruby has to hear herself talk, it’s amazing

Zwei

After future! RWBY JNR+O have their dramatic info-dump with past!Oz Crew, they start looking into how far Salem’s Fall of Beacon plot has gotten, and look into the “exchange students”

Pull up a picture of Cinder

Yang: That’s the bxxx.

Speaking of that dramatic info-dump, I’m already thinking about That Conversation with Ozpin and Oscar because same hat my dear anon I’d love for Oscar to have the chance to talk to someone else, openly, who gets it. Who knows everything he knows now, and can’t lock himself away, and who gets it. 

I think (if this somehow happened just after volume 6 and present!Oz is still keeping his distance) Oz would at the very least speak up to Oscar in private, even if he doesn’t know what’s going on. I think he’d warn Oscar against talking to Ozpin, or letting on to Ozpin who Oscar is. It could lead to too many ideas or thoughts or emotions about things they have no actual power to change or control. That it would probably cause more problems than it solves (he’s not exactly wrong)

They do a pretty good job just writing Oscar off to the Oz Crew as just a kid they picked up in Mistral. They get through the conversation about timelines and where to go from here and what to do next without Oscar’s history or Oz’s backstory coming up. They’re pretty sure they can brush it off

but then everyone’s leaving Ozpin’s office and Ozpin says: Mr. Pine, If I could speak with you a moment?

Oscar’s nervous, and Oz wants him to leave, but Oscar’s pretty sure there’s no getting out of it. Then it’s just Oscar with Ozpin behind his desk. 

Ozpin’s looking out the window with his mug, and he asks: How old are you, Oscar?

Oscar says: Almost fifteen.

Ozpin sighs. He has to set his mug down. He asks: How long?

Oscar: I’m... I’m sorry?

Ozpin: How long have I been with you?

(Ozpin figured it out. Not right away, but through little things and little realizations stacking up. “I stand like that” “He asks the questions I want to ask” “He keeps looking to the side like he’s listening to somethi-- oh snap”)

(Step four: cry)

When the secret’s out to the past!RWBYJNPR teams that the future!RWBYJNR teams are there (because of course it gets out) Jaune marches up to himself, points to Pyrrha across the room and is like

“DO YOU SEE HER? LOOK AT HER. NO, LOOK AT HER AGAIN.”

Then he smooshes his face in his hands and is like

“You sweet summer imbecile take her on a date before the sun sets or I will fill you bed with molasses”  

From here it’s like re-imagining season 3 but with all these extra characters. Imagine the training fights oh man 

I kinda love the image of Oscar just hanging out in Ozpin’s office a lot, like during class periods he would otherwise enroll in if he wasn’t even younger than Ruby was when she started at Beacon. A 15 year old prodigy from a family of huntsmen and huntresses who’s been to combat school and breaths huntressing? okay. a 14 year old who’s never been to combat school, picked up a weapon less than a year ago, as is escalating in skill faster than conceivably possible? that’s a raised eyebrow or twelve

still dying for an Ironwood reaction to Oscar (volume 7 please) 

oh, backtrack: future!RWBYJRN+O don’t give themselves up as time travelers on purpose. They hold the cover pretty well until someone spots Yang with a robot arm and then it’s all out the window. past!Jaune probably sees her pull it off and shrieks dramatically 

seeing Qrow in 100% Support Oz mode is probably a little unsettling for them now

oh man how do they break it to them?? do they??

this is all I’ve got so far but it’s only been like a day

[crystalninjaphoenix]

The First Session

Septics Inverted

A JSE Fanfic

Just like the last story, this one takes place near the beginning of the timeline, so to speak. Not everything was a-okay the moment the boys got Jack to join their household. They still needed to find one more member to make sure everything went perfectly from that moment on

Read the intro story: Part One | Part Two

Various other AU-related stuff found here

Taglist: @evyptids @awkward-bullshit @watermelonsinmyattic @asunachinadoll @a-humble-narcissus @metautske @odysseus-is-best-boi  @acuriousquail

“Whatever you’re doing, it’s not working.”

Chase never said hello like a normal person, he always opened up with statements like this. Or at least, that’s how he always started a conversation with Marvin. He didn’t even knock on the closed library door, just barged right in and interrupted the magician in the middle of very important research.

Marvin scowled, snapping the book he’d been reading closed and slamming it down on the desk. “Nice to see you too. I’m close to a breakthrough here, can you insult me later?”

“This is more important than...your, um, thing.” Chase looked noticeably uncomfortable upon thinking about Marvin’s thing. Coward. “This is about Jack.”

The magician raised an eyebrow, not that Chase could see that behind his mask. “What about him?”

“He wants to leave.”

“Yeah, that’s been his constant state of being for the last month or so.”

“I know!” Chase snapped. “And that’s the problem! You were supposed to fix that! But after a couple of days, whatever spell you cast wears off, and he starts to wonder why he’s here instead of at his apartment. And Schneep’s been noticing that that time period between ‘forgetting’ and ‘remembering’ is getting shorter and shorter. I can’t keep deflecting his questions forever! And if I can’t do that, everything’s gonna fall apart. He’s gonna wonder what you’re doing down here all the time, or realize that every time Jackie goes out there’s a new attack on a gang, or stop trusting any drink Schneep gives him because it’s pretty weird that he keeps falling asleep afterwards.”

Marvin shrugged. “Well, we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. There are a lot of empty basement rooms ever since Schneep started the clinic.”

“You’re fucking joking, right?” Chase said, appalled. “First, of all, that’s my friend, that’s not gonna happen. He likes me. Second, you don’t think the world’s gonna notice when a YouTuber with, I dunno, sixteen million subscribers goes missing? A little suspicious, huh?”

“Hadn’t considered that,” Marvin admitted. He wasn’t going to say it, but he was a little disappointed in himself. He should’ve been able to do something as simple as this. So, naturally, he gritted his teeth and turned that disappointment into anger. “Well, excuse me for trying out a whole new branch of magic just to help you. I’ll remind you that you told me to find a solution, then pushed me to use the Con’joi het Oblivisc enchantment when I found it. I’m not a fucking mentalist, I don’t know how this shit works!”

“Well you probably know someone who does!” Chase half-shouted. “So go get help for this if you need to!”

“I don’t know anyone who—” Marvin stopped suddenly. A couple months ago he would’ve yelled at Chase to go find a mentalist himself if he was so desperate to keep this charade up. But recently... “Actually, maybe I could work something out.” He reached for his phone and began looking up directions. “Gimme a couple days. Go...I dunno, jump over a couch or whatever it is you do for your stupid videos. Talk to your friend. Whatever.”

Chase glared at him. “You better hurry.”

“Fuck you, Chase.”

He’d gone to a party—or, sorry, a gala—in this part of town before. A fancy affair, run by some old man for a reason he hadn’t paid attention to. He’d been in need of a new volunteer at the time, so he’d gone recruiting. As the gala progressed, he watched for potential candidates, and one guy got his attention. He tried to keep an eye on him, but eventually he realized the guy had disappeared, shortly after talking to a guy in a fancy red vest with a pocket watch. Marvin was the type of person who didn’t appreciate someone edging in on his territory, so he did some digging...

That had led him to this place: an old-fashioned house that had been renovated into some kind of business. There was a sign out front that, for the life of him, Marvin couldn’t read. It was like the words kept shifting...Marvin scowled, and let a bit of his magic flow into his eyes. He blinked against the sudden burn, but it was worth it. Now he could see the sign was actually blank. Probably a spell that let the reader fill in the empty space with whatever they needed or wanted most. There were a lot of trinkets like that.

Marvin entered the lobby, and was immediately greeted by a blonde woman of the conventionally attractive sort, sitting behind a desk. “Hello there!” she said cheerfully. “Do you have an appointment?”

Marvin stared at her warily. Her smile was wide, but her eyes were curiously clouded. There was a nameplate on the desk that was as blank as the sign outside. “Just checking this place out. Never seen it before.”

“Well, we’re a pretty small business,” the woman laughed. “We only take appointments, so if you want to make one we have a form here for you to fill out.”

“Uh, no thanks. I was just wondering...this is a pretty, ah, niche place. Who came up with the idea for it?”

“That would be Mr. Jackson. He’s the founder, owner, and employer.”

“Neat. Can I talk to him?” Marvin had never been one for subtlety.

The woman’s smile slipped. “I’m sorry, you’ll have to make an appointment.”

“I’m a busy man. I’m here now. Let’s seize the moment.” 

“Mr. Jackson is very peculiar about his privacy.”

“I would be too. But I have a feeling he wouldn’t want to miss this opportunity.”

The woman stared blankly into space, then recovered her smile and nodded. “Of course, I understand. Head through the door to the left, his office is right down the hall.”

Well, that was easier than expected. Marvin was bracing himself, getting prepared to get rid of the woman, then go looking for this Jackson himself. But just less than a minute of talking later, he was in? If something is easy, it’s either a trap, or Marvin overestimated the other player in this game. He didn’t like those options. Nevertheless, he squared his shoulders and walked through the door to the left.

Marvin only took a few steps down the wallpapered hall before the door behind him swung shut and all the lights went out. He stopped in his tracks and sighed. “Really? We’re doin’ this?” he muttered. As he thought, there was no answer.

Darkness didn’t bother Marvin. At some point in the past, he’d lost the ability to be blinded by it. He could see the hall just as well, though he only saw shades of muted gray instead of the bright yellow wallpaper and deceptively welcoming decorations. He started walking down the hall again. It went farther back than he thought it did at first. Doors lined either side of it, but Marvin headed towards the very end.

One of the doors creaked open behind him.

Immediately, the magician spun around, fingers trailing violet flames. Two men, both large and well-built, charged forward. Marvin evaporated into a puff of lavender smoke and let them run right past the spot where he would’ve been before re-materializing to their backs. One of the men stopped, confused, and Marvin took the opportunity to blast him. The man didn’t even scream as the black magic consumed his body, leaving ash behind.

The other man was smarter. He pressed against the side of a wall, and when the blast came he ducked low. Marvin, momentarily confused by the absolute silence of the first man, was just distracted enough for the one left to dive at his legs and knock him to the ground. Marvin cried out in surprise as he hit the floor hard. The man crawled forward and decked him in the face, knocking his mask eschew.

Even though it was dark and there was no way the man could see Marvin’s face, the magician was consumed by a boiling rage. Nobody saw what was underneath his mask. Nobody. Marvin hissed in anger. His hand darted out and grabbed the man’s arm, pulling him closer so that his other hand could wrap around the man’s neck. “Itaqii, ers coimydi,” Marvin growled. Purple waves pulsed from his hands along the man’s skin, eating holes in it. This man didn’t scream either, though he tried his best to pull away as the spell slowly, very slowly, ate him alive, right down to the bones.

The lights came back on. Marvin hurriedly let go of the man’s remains and pulled his mask back into place, making a note to invest in stronger, tighter straps. The hall had somehow shrunk, and Marvin was at the end, in front of a grand-looking door. He stood up, brushed himself off, and debated opening the door.

{Come in.}

Marvin jumped. That voice—no, it wasn’t a voice. It was like a thought from an outside source. If he hadn’t been magical himself, he would’ve doubted he heard it. But now? All it meant was that this guy had telepathy in his bag of tricks.

“Alright, if you insist,” Marvin muttered this to himself, then stepped forward and pushed open the door.

The office beyond was just as old-fashioned as the building outside. The walls were covered in a dark red paper, there was an elaborate fireplace, and a desk with a fancy armchair behind and in front of it. There were a lot of bookshelves, and every one of them was full of books with leather covers that could only be spellbooks.

A man was sitting behind the desk, wearing a red vest and a derby hat. He looked like he’d been waiting for him for a while. {Hello!} Marvin perceived that the mental voice was coming from the man. {What did you want to see me about?}

Marvin stepped into the room, glaring at the door to make sure it wasn’t going to shut on him. “You’re Mr. Jackson, then?”

{Certainly. I am Jameson Jackson, though you can give me a nickname if you wish. Please, have a seat.} Jameson gestured to the other armchair.

“I’d rather stand, thanks.” Marvin walked over to the desk, firmly put his hands on it and leaned forward. “So what’s the deal with your goons back there?”

{It was a test!} Jameson smiled, and Marvin hated that he felt warm and sunshiney inside upon seeing it. {I was watching you in the lobby, through the secretary. I told her to let you in, then I toggled the lights and the door and sent those two after you. I had to make sure you were—}

“Worth your time?” Marvin guessed. “Okay. Fine. You could’ve done that a million other ways. And what’s with the creepy silence? That lady was the only one in this building who’s said a word to me.”

{Well, that’s due to my inability,} Jameson remarked dryly. {But I told the other two to stay quiet. No matter what. I expected them to be able to sneak up on you, especially in the dark. You were fast!}

“Yeah, I have permanent night vision. No, it’s not a cat thing, I just liked the mask.” Marvin stood up straight again. “So anyway, I saw you at that special fancy gala. You hypnotized the guy I was after, didn’t you?”

{Oh, Mr. Underman’s Gala!} Jameson clapped his hands. {I remember that! That’s where I got my new secretary. You saw my work, and I’m assuming you were impressed?}

“Well, you definitely did something that I haven’t been able to do.” Marvin couldn’t keep a note of bitterness out of his voice. “And that’s why I’m here. See, me and my housemates have a...guest. He’s very important, but sometimes he...isn’t sure he wants to stay with us anymore. I’ve been using a Con’joi het Oblivisc on him, but he’s developing an immunity. I know you’re good at this. And I’m willing to, I dunno, pay you or whatever to help us out.”

Jameson tilted his head, rather like a curious puppy. {A Con’joi het Oblivisc...the “content to forget” enchantment. Yes, I know it. It’s very basic. Even if someone has mental shields that are practically nonexistent, they’ll eventually catch on to one. It’s not meant to last a long time. But fortunately, I know many spells that are.}

“Great. What d’ya want for it?”

{Oh, nothing much. I’d need to be close to the vict—your guest, so a room in the house, perhaps?} When Marvin nodded, he continued. {But here’s the catch: if I leave my little business here, I’d need a supply of...manpower. To replace that which this location generates for me.}

Marvin laughed. “Oh my god, dude, is that all? Not a problem.” Jameson looked skeptical. “Trust me, you don’t know my housemates. That’ll be the easy bit. But I gotta ask...what do you need those guys for?”

{Oh, various things,} Jameson projected, waving. {Errands. Chores. Bank accounts. Protection. Anything else I don’t want to do. And...hmm, I don’t know if I should tell you this part.}

“Nothing you say could surprise me.”

{I was born in the year 1898.} Contrary to his words, that did surprise Marvin. {It’s very hard to keep looking this young when you’re over a hundred. You seem knowledgeable when it comes to these sorts of things. I bet you can figure the rest out.} Jameson grinned. {Now, while I wait for my manpower to gather my things, can you tell me some more specifics about your situation?}

Jack didn’t know what he was doing here. He felt like he was in that position a lot lately. The others said he’d agreed to move in with them when they needed help with rent, but...he got the feeling they were keeping something from him. Chase was evading his questions. Jackie just changed the subject whenever he asked. Schneep was busy with work all the time, and when he was home he acted...odd. And Marvin was in the basement all the time and refused to talk about what he was doing there.

“Hey, Jack.”

Okay, maybe Marvin wasn’t in the basement all the time. Right now, he’d just come into the kitchen/dining room where Jack was sitting, drinking coffee. He was tired all the time lately, and trying to remedy that with caffeine. “Oh, hey Marv,” he yawned. “How’re’ya?”

“Pretty good,” Marvin said. “Hey, I want you to meet someone.”

“Really? Who—” Jack blinked. The newcomer looked exactly like him (and all the rest of them, honestly) but with a mustache and a snazzy outfit. He waved at Jack, beaming.

“This is Jameson,” Marvin explained. “James, this is Jack. Jameson is a friend of mine from work, and since he recently lost his house I offered to let him stay with us. We needed more rent help, anyway.”

{It’s so good to meet you! Marvin’s told me all about you.}

“What the fuck?!” Jack nearly knocked over his coffee mug in shock.

“Oh, ah, Jameson’s mute,” Marvin winced, awkward. “But it’s okay, ‘cause he taught himself telepathy. So...you should get used to that.”

“Oh. Okay. I get it. Yeah.” Jack laughed nervously. “Your work is magic, so there’s some-some magic involved here. Okay.”

“I’m goin’ downstairs to the library now.” Marvin turned around. “I’ll let you two get to know each other.”

Jameson took a seat at the dining table across from Jack. {You don’t have to be nervous. I’m not a mind reader or anything.}

“Oh damn, that’d be helpful,” Jack said with another nervous laugh. “You’d never have to guess what I was thinking.”

{Unfortunately, I’m stuck with the old-fashioned way: asking.} Jameson smiled gently. {You looked pretty deep in your thoughts when Marvin and I came in. Would you take a penny for them?}

“I mean, I dunno...” Jack trailed off. Jameson was giving him the most adorable, wide-eyed curious expression. He couldn’t say no to that face. “Well...I was thinking about...my friend...”

{Which one?}

“Oh, uh, it-it’s a little difficult to explain. I mean, you know Marv and you obviously know magic, but still...his name is Anti. He’s—actually, I don’t know what he is. He’s electric, somehow, and he’s definitely not human. Usually when I leave home he’s able to find me pretty quickly and he sorta, just, pops in to check on me, but...I haven’t seen him. I’m...kinda worried.”

{Why would you be worried about him?} Jameson asked. His mental voice seemed to have changed, sounding a bit closer to Jack’s own. {After what he did on Halloween?}

“Oh, uh, Marvin told you about that? I...yeah, I’m kinda pissed at him. But maybe I just need to talk to him? He has to have had a good reason.”

{But what if he doesn’t?}

“I...” Jack yawned. He was feeling even more tired than he was before. “He has to...he has to...” {But wasn’t Anti a bit chaotic like that? He didn’t always do things with reason.} “Or...maybe he doesn’t have one...He’s a bit chaotic like that.”

{I see, I see. When did you meet him?}

“I was...” There seemed to be a haze over his memories. Jack struggled to remember, {but he couldn’t.} “I don’t know.”

{I think your friends told me you met him in October. He showed up in one of your videos.}

“He was in some of them...but...” That wasn’t the {That was the first time he met him.} “Yeah, that’s right.”

{Oh, Jack, I’m so sorry about what happened to you.}

“What happened...to me?” He was so tired, but he couldn’t close his eyes.

{Don’t you remember?}

“Nothing happened...” He was seeing spirals.

{That’s okay. I’ll tell you what happened. Your Anti is a monster, did you know that?}

He hadn’t. That seemed like something he should’ve known. Like an important thing. Blearily, he shook his head.

{Let me tell you about all the horrible things he’s done. Isn’t that a good idea?}

“Mm-hmm...”

{Yes, it’s a very good idea. You’re lucky to have such good friends with such good ideas. You’re all really close. You trust them unconditionally.}

He...of course he did. They were such a close group. They were so close. All of them, friends. Friends trust each other. {Friends don’t wonder why one of them is acting weird.} His friends have such good ideas, all the time, {so he should listen to them, no matter what.} No matter what...

Jack was staring at nothing now. He faced straight ahead with a blank expression on his face. His eyes were cloudy. Jameson glanced away for a brief moment, back towards the entrance to the kitchen/dining room. The four others were there, watching. Marvin was giving Chase an I-told-you-so look. Chase was glaring in return. Jackie’s eyes were scanning the scene, taking in every detail. Schneep was undoubtedly fascinated with everything.

Jameson nodded at them, then turned back to the cloudy-eyed Jack. He snapped his fingers in front of his face and got no reaction, not even a twitch. This was going to be easier than he thought.

{Are you ready Jack?}

Ready...yes, he was ready...of course he was...

{Good. Then let’s begin. We have a lot of work to do, and you’re excited for it, aren’t you? You’re excited to learn the truth?}

Yes, he was excited...he was going to learn the truth...the truth about his friends...they were his friends...didn’t he have another friend?...no, it was just them...them and the monster...the monster...the terrible monster...the anti-him...Anti...

Jack forgot.

[crossbows-and-moonshine]

Blood in the Water (Sequel to Such a Softer Sin) Chapter 5

(Chapter 1)

(Chapter 2)

(Chapter 3)

(Chapter 4)

I’m using both the script and the movie to help with dialogue and shit, using just the movie was proving too time-consuming. The script is so different to the movie, it's crazy. I’m taking some liberties with the timeline, the movie has me confused. St Patty's day back then was on a Wednesday, but when Rocco talks about hitting the Sin Bin to get Vincenzo, he says he's there every Wednesday, but it doesn't seem like a week goes by before they do it, I don't know. Maybe I’m missing something, either way, if the timeline seems weird, I’m being creative to be able to fit my own shit inside the canon stuff.

Mad props to fanfic writers that always write their fics canon, cause this shit is hard as fuckkk.

---------------------------------

Lila woke the next morning with a start, and her head whipped around, eyes scanning the loft for the boys in hopes they came home when she was asleep and didn't want to wake her. She was alone though, the loft felt eerie without them and her stomach lurched. Why didn't they come back? Or at least call? What if something happened? She needed to get out of the fucking loft. Maybe she should buy some new towels for when the boys got back. She got dressed in some clean jeans and a dark green shirt, slinging on her hoodie and boots and throwing her hair up in a messy high ponytail before she left.

She was almost at the store when she saw Rocco at a payphone, she blinked for a moment, he looked tense and weird, she wondered if maybe he had heard from the boys. She started to make her way over when she saw him cross the street, going into the deli. She followed after him and walked through the door, just in time to see Rocco shooting someone. Her eyes widened and she almost fell on her ass as Rocco took out another almost instantly and then came over, shooting the man behind the counter, yelling like he’d lost his damn mind. Suddenly he turned the gun on her, eyes wild as he stared at her. When he realised it was her, she saw confusion cross his face before he stuffed the gun in his jeans and grabbed her wrist, dragging her out of there.

“We gotta go! We gotta fuckin’ go!” He yelled, dragging her so fast she almost tripped a few times. She didn't have the chance to protest as he stuffed her in the passenger side of his car, getting in and pulling out with a screech.

“What the fuck Rocco?!” She yelled, looking at him like he had grown three heads. She had just witnessed her best friend fucking kill three people in broad daylight. Had everyone she knew lost their fucking minds?! He was yelling incoherently, something about being set up, and Lila was struggling to keep up with him.

“This is all your fuckin’ boys fault!” He shouted, hitting the steering wheel. He was going so fast Lila thought she might get thrown from the car.

“What?! You know?” She asked warily, she didn't know how else to take his words.

“Of course I fuckin’ know, I walked in after they took out those nine fuckin’ guys at the Plaza! Fuck!” Lila blinked at him, looking at him confused.

“Rocco, where are they?” She asked firmly, making him glance to her. He was dripping in sweat and looked like he was about to crawl out of his skin.

“They're at my place, we went back there last night and got wasted.” He muttered, eyes darting everywhere as he made a sharp turn and Lilas head almost hit the window.

“They’re with you?!” She roared, making his eyes widen as he looked at her, he just blinked not knowing what to say.

“They couldn't even fucking call me to tell me they’re alive?!” She was fucking furious and Rocco knew he’d landed them in shit.

“You know about the shit they're doin’? Some crazy ass bullshit if you ask me.” He ran a hand through his damp wild hair.

Lilas' chest was heaving, she had been so worried and they'd been at Rocco's, they knew she’d be at the loft yet they didn't even bother to call her to ease her worries. Rocco looked at her and he could see just how pissed she was.

“Shit, I didn't think you knew alright? Shit's been fuckin’ hectic. Fuck! I can't believe I just…” Lila focused on staring out the window and Rocco preceded to tell her everything he knew, from the second the boys dragged him in the Plaza with masks on, to him fucking killing the cat by accident, everything up to what led him to commit murder in the deli. She wasn't sure if he was telling her for her benefit or his, like he needed to just get it all out there to make sense of it all.

When they got to his place, he hit the brakes so hard that she yelped, he was gone in an instant, running into his house like a mad man. Lila got out, following after him slowly, still angry to fuck at the boys and she could hear Rocco yelling at them to pack their shit.

“Alright, I love this shit!” She heard Murphy yell excitedly, she would have smiled if she didn't want to throttle the shit out of him. There was more shouting and as she finally made her way to his front door, Rocco was waving his gun around as he shouted at Donna and her friend, both of them clearly high as fuck. She saw the boys stuffing things in bags and they hadn't noticed her yet, but then she looked back to Rocco as he pointed a gun at Donna's friend as he screamed at her, the woman was wailing and Lila squinted unimpressed with her best friend. He’d seriously lost his fucking shit.

“Rocco! Put it the fuck down!” She yelled, storming over and tugging his arm away.

The boys' heads snapped up hearing her voice and they stilled completely seeing her there. Rocco groaned, stuffing the gun back in his pants as he looked to Lila with a regretful sigh. When she turned back around, the boys looked at her with such guilty scared faces and she narrowed her eyes at them.

“Let's get the fuck outta here!” Rocco grumbled, pushing Lila out of the door and the boys following behind with bags. Murphy reached for her arm and she yanked it away from him, giving him such an intense look he actually recoiled.

“Lila…” Connor started, frowning at her. She just turned her back and followed Rocco who was still muttering to himself.

Connor sighed as they got to the car, looking to Rocco who still looked halfway to insane.

“Listen Roc, did anybody see ye?” Connor asked, looking to his friend concerned. Shooting up the deli in the middle of the day was hardly a good plan.

“Of course they fucking saw him! He lost his fucking shit, he pulled his gun on me!” Lila shouted, making Rocco's eyes widen and look at her guilty.

“Ye did what?!” Murphy yelled, smacking Rocco upside the head.

“Wait a fuckin’ minute, Lila was there? Ye left tegether?” Connor asked carefully, glancing from Lila to Rocco. It didn't take a rocket scientist to put the pieces together, if people saw Rocco do it and then leave with Lila, she was wanted just as much. Whether that was by the police or by the mafia themselves.

“For Christ sake Roc! Now look what ye've done!” Murphy growled, kicking the side of the car in frustration. Rocco raked a hand through his hair, tugging on it a little, looking more than guilty.

“I wouldn't have been at the deli if I hadn't woken up alone, worried about you two fuck heads. I left the loft to distract myself.” Lila glared at the twins, making sure they fucking knew they were in deep shit with her.

“Lila, look, we’re sorry alright?” Connor sighed, looking at her warily. She just scoffed bitterly.

“Yeah okay… You went off and killed a bunch of assholes, then decided to get shit faced with Rocco. You didn't even think about me, it's like I don't even exist anymore!” She sneered, fists clenching by her sides.

“O’ course we thought about ye, how can ye even say that?” Murphy frowned, getting upset as he stared at her.

“Don't fucking lie to me! If you thought about me even once, you would have used your fucking brain and called me!” She yelled, shoving Murphy hard in the chest, venting her anger out on the closest twin. He stumbled back a minute before he pushed her back with a scowl, lightly of course otherwise she would have flown backwards, but it was enough to make her growl at him.

“We had a lot o’ shit goin’ on! Doesn't mean we didn't think about ye!” He snapped, getting in her face. She didn't back down though as she glared at him.

“And whose faults that? You two chose to go out there and do what you did, all you had to do was let me know you were fucking okay.” She seethed. Connor grabbed her arm and pulled her away from Murphy as Lila continued her stare off with him.

She shook Connor off her and got in the back of the car, slamming the door behind her. The twins shared a look and sighed. They knew they'd messed up. They should have called her. There wasn't really a good enough excuse not to have called her. They were dealing with this new calling and had a lot going on with them, they just thought she would be asleep by the time they were done and they planned on checking in with her in the morning. They knew they'd fucked up, seeing how upset she was, how worried she had been, the guilt settled into their bones and they weren’t sure how to make it up to her, not when they knew they were not finished carrying out their special brand of justice. There were more people to get rid of now, and they weren't sure how Lila was going to deal with it.

Rocco got in the back with her whilst Connor took up driving, Murphy in the passenger seat with his leg up on the dash. Lila remained silent and Rocco kept looking at her like a kicked puppy.

“You know I wasn’t gonna shoot you, right?” He asked quietly, not wanting the boys to hear, they were already mad enough that he had pulled a gun on their girl.

“I know Roc, don't worry, you’re fine.” She gave him a weak smile and he relaxed, feeling better. He hadn't really expected the girl to just be there at the deli, he felt like he’d really got her knee-deep in shit now, she was associated with him after what he did.

They were on their way to Rocco's mom's house, she was out of town and it seemed like a good place to hide out for now.

“Connor, stop the car! Stop the fuckin’ car man!” Rocco exclaimed, making Lila jump a little as Connor pulled the car up. It was outside what looked to be a strip club and Lila quirked a brow at Rocco.

“Vincenzo, that fat mother fucker, Yakavetta’s right hand. He's the one who set me up. Then he went around shootin’ his mouth off, tellin’ everyone I was as good as dead. He goes in there every Wednesday night around 10:00, he jerks off to the same titty dancer. Never misses.” He spoke animatedly, eyes flitting from one brother to another. Lilas' eyes narrowed slightly, starting to see why Rocco was telling them this and not liking it one bit.

“Yeah, so?” Murphy looked back at him, quirking a brow.

“So let's kill the motherfucker! I mean, what are you guys... like that's your new thing right?!” He asked, sitting forward a little, his eyes going wild again. Lila shifted in her seat feeling fucking uncomfortable. They were talking about killing someone. A bad person yeah, but still a fucking person. When did her boys and Rocco start acting like talking about murder was just taking someone out for dinner?

Connor pulled a face and looked to his brother before back in front of him.

“Yeah...well…” He sounded hesitant, waving his hand dismissively.

“Oh, what the fuck? I mean, who makes the cut? Is there a raffle or somethin’?!” Rocco asked exasperatedly. Lila might have laughed at his reaction if it wasn't for the fact they were talking about murder.

“Well te tell ye the truth, those first ones, they just sorta fell inte our laps.” Murphy admitted as he glanced back at Rocco again, his eyes falling onto Lila. She wasn't looking at any of them and he could see she was feeling awkward about the whole thing. He felt bad for shouting at her, it had just hurt him, offended him for her to say he hadn’t thought about her, he always fucking thought about her. He reached back hesitantly, fingers brushing her knee softly, making her eyes snap to his. For a brief second, he saw his beautiful Lila, eyes full of love and adoration, but it was like she remembered she was mad at them and suddenly her eyes went cold before she looked away. He moved his hand with a sigh feeling the sting of rejection build in his chest.

“Well, what d’ya do?” Rocco asked confused, looking between the boys.

“We haven't really got a system for decidin’ who Roc, its uh…” Connor stumbled, trying to find the right words for his strangely excited friend. Rocco looked between them both getting more and more worked up, he looked like he was about to burst at the seams.

“ME! Me! I’m the guy! I know everyone! Their habits, who they hang out with, who they talk to. I got phone numbers! Addresses! I know who they’re fuckin’! I know where they live!... We could kill everyone…” He sounded so in awe of his own plan and Lila slowly turned to look at him like he was crazy. Murphy pursed his lips like he was actually thinking about it as he turned to his brother.

“So, what do ye think?” He asked seriously, making Lila roll her eyes and shake her head.

“I’m strangely comfortable with it.” Connor replied nonchalantly, making Murphy smirk as Rocco huffed a laugh.

“This is...wow...you assholes have really lost your damn minds.” Lila muttered, pressing closer to the door. She knew these guys, these guys who were more boys than men most of the time and now they were fucking killers, what world did she fucking wake up in for this shit to happen?

Connor looked at her through the rearview mirror as Murphy glanced around at her, hearing her words. They chose not to say anything, they would talk to her once they got to Rocco's mother's house, where Connor hoped to have a serious and civil conversation. They set off driving again and it didn't take too long to get there. Lila got out, avoiding the boys and following Rocco inside. She glanced around curiously before moving into the kitchen, helping herself to a glass of water because she fucking needed one.

“We need te talk.” She heard Connors serious voice behind her. She scoffed into the glass before slamming it down, turning to face him and his twin who was stood to his right.

“Stating the obvious there.” She sassed, crossing her arms over her chest. Murphy licked his lower lip, glaring at her almost and Connor heaved a sigh.

“Look, ye know we have te do this, ye know why, ye had the dream. We can’t just ignore what Gods asked us te do.” He said exasperatedly, frowning at her.

Lila looked at him with so much pain for a moment it made the boys breathless and she shook her head.

“It might have slipped your attention, but never once did I ask you not to go out there and do this, never once have I told you not to go. All I asked was that you tell me if you’re safe and you couldn't even manage that.” She stated with hurt lacing her words, looking at them both. The boys glanced to each other then, she was right. They hadn't really noticed she hadn't asked them not to do this, she hadn't tried to use their love for her to manipulate them into staying at home with her. She hadn't asked anything of them other than knowing they were okay, and that just made them feel like huge assholes. They knew if the shoe was on the other foot, and they had been worried about her like that and she had been fine all along, there would have been hell to pay. They had let her down, again.

“Look, we’re sorry alright? We should have called ye, we don't have a good reason and we can't turn back time. All we can do is just apologise.” Connor sighed regretfully as he wiped a hand over his face, looking at her imploringly.

“I get it, you didn't think about me. Because whatever this is, this new life of yours, there's no room for me in it.” She said bitterly, turning around to fill her glass up again, she was starting to feel lightheaded, this drama was too much for her.

“Don't say that.” Murphy muttered sadly, if she would have looked at him she would have seen the hurt all over his face.

“There is fuckin’ room for ye Lila, it's right beside us, as it’s always been. I'm not gonna lie te ye and tell ye things are the same, ‘cause they aren't, but yer place is still by our side. That’ll never change.” Connor said firmly, stepping forward and turning her to face them.

She couldn't look them in the eye and she focused on Connors rosary dangling in front of his chest. She knew they were good men, she knew why they were doing what they were doing, she knew it was a good thing, something that needed to be done. It was still a hard pill to swallow that the people tasked with ridding the world of such evil were her boys. She only had two options; walk away and forget about them, or stick around and just get used to their new line of work and pray they'd be okay. There was no way in hell she was going to walk away, so she needed to make peace with this. She couldn't stay angry at them forever.

“Promise me one thing.” She said softly, finally meeting his eyes before looking over his shoulder at Murphy, the darker twin with his sad eyes that made her heart ache.

“Anythin’ m’girl.” Murphy insisted almost desperately, his eyes not leaving hers.

“Don't pull that shit again. I was worried sick about you two and that's not okay. If you can't come home to me, you fucking get a hold of me somehow so I know you're fine.” She demanded firmly.

“We promise.” The boys replied without hesitation. They knew they had made a mistake. They had been selfish and they wouldn't do it again. They had made her think she had no place with them anymore and that shit wasn't acceptable. Her place was always in between them, no matter what, and they needed to show her that.

Taglist; @risingphoenix761 @daryldixonandfrogs @arlaina28 @divadinag

[for-a-flower]

Asking for a Fight

           The Golden Flower left the throne room immediately this time, popping up further from the castle near a capital city street.  Surely there were other ways to accomplish the same end he had reached during his last run.  Maybe if he intentionally left one or two monsters alive, he’d find it even more entertaining.  Sans though, that useless lazy person hadn’t even tried to fight for his life.  At least Papyrus had given his best effort.  So why did Sans give up without as much as a single attack?  Flowey glanced down at the dirt along the sidewalk as a couple monsters casually walked by.

           “Go ahead.  I’ve got no reason to live in a world like this,” Sans had said.  As Flowey remembered that, he realized the skeleton had been holding something, Papyrus’ red cape.  A disturbing grin stretched across Flowey’s face.  So that was why.  Sans knew his brother was dead.  But what would happen if Flowey killed off everyone else first and then went after Papyrus?  The flower burrowed.  This would prove even easier than before.  Now that he knew the attacks of nearly every monster in the underground, he felt smart and unstoppable.  It fueled his determination further.

           In under a couple hours of time with only a few saves and deaths, Flowey had managed to destroy almost every monster he intended.  But since he hadn’t triggered an explosion in the Core, Alphys and several monsters from Hotland and the capital managed to lock themselves away in the True Lab.  Flowey had to search a few hours before he figured out where they had gone.  After discovering them hiding in the lab, Flowey hunted them down as well.  Alphys had been the easiest of the bunch, simply freezing in place at first sight of Flowey.  Still no sign of Sans though.  Flowey’s determination and will to keep these results so far, allowed him to mark the current point in time if he wanted to return.

           A door flew open and snowflakes blew in from outside.  “Sans?!” called Papyrus.  “There’s a flower killing everyone!  I came back to warn you!”  Leaving the door open behind him, the skeleton walked through the living room of his home then bolted up stairs to the left.  He came to a closed door and threw it open.  “Sans!”  The room was dark and empty.

           Quiet laughing came from the front door.  “Hee hee hee . . .”  Papyrus spun around to peer down from the second floor balcony.  A flower blocked the doorway with a happy smile on his face.  “So concerned for your brother . . . when you should be the one running,” said Flowey.

           Papyrus looked concerned and alarmed.  “Why are you killing everyone?” he asked.

           “Because it’s entertaining,” the flower said.

           The skeleton went back downstairs and approached the Golden Flower.  “Well, then maybe I can interest you in another hobby?  Maybe cooking!  Or drawing!  And Sans has an instrument, so maybe he could teach you how to play one too!”  A vine came up behind Papyrus and grabbed his neck.

           Flowey glared.  “You stupid skeleton.  Do I look like I can do any of those things?!”

           “I’m sure we can still teach you!  Your vines are strong enough.  All you need is a little help,” added Papyrus.  He was sweating now.

           “I don’t WANT your help!”

           “But-”

           “SHUT UP!”  With the swift stab of a vine, Flowey pierced through the skeleton’s battle armor and rib cage.  Papyrus’ body scattered to dust and spread over the carpet of his home.  Flowey’s vines returned to the ground.  He left the open doorway.

           It wasn’t until he started back in the direction of the Ruins, that Flowey finally found Sans.  He was leaning on the locked door that blocked the Ruins from everything else in the underground.  His eyes were closed and hands in the pockets of his blue, hooded jacket.  As Flowey inched closer along the snow covered path, Sans opened an eye.

           “Sup, Flowey?” he said with a casual tone of voice.

           The flower stopped to narrow his eyes with a suspicious stare.  “How do you know my name?”

           Sans opened his other eye and shrugged.  “What if I didn’t?  Maybe I just assumed you weren’t good at comin’ up with names.”

           “Where were you earlier?  There’s no way you didn’t know what was happening to everyone in the underground.  Why didn’t you show up and try to stop me from killing your brother?!” Flowey shouted.

           Sans didn’t answer directly.  He closed his eyes again where he still leaned his back against the heavy door.  “I came by earlier to warn the lady behind the door.  I knocked and waited for a response.  No one ever came.  It’s because she was already dead . . . wasn’t she?”  The skeleton opened his eyes with a sort of passive glare that somehow went right through Flowey.  “Finish your business here and next time don’t expect to be so lucky,” said Sans.

           Flowey tilted his petalled head and raised one eyebrow.  “Next time?”

           “I saw some of your fights.  You know too much for doin’ this only once.”

           Flowey scowled.  “Agh!  What kind of moron are you?!”  He closed his eyes and mumbled to himself.  “This isn’t what I wanted.  I’m going back . . . now.”

           Flowey opened his eyes where he had last marked the timeline near Snowdin Town, his save point.  He had a few minutes until Papyrus showed up at his house.  This time he’d meet him inside.

           Two minutes later, the door flew open and Papyrus stepped in.  “Sans?!”  He noticed the flower and glanced down.  Papyrus gasped, eyes somehow almost bulging from his head.  Flowey’s roots were spread out on the floor beneath him to keep himself upright.  “Oh!  How did you get in here?” Papyrus asked.  Flowey’s eyes glanced to his left.  There was a hole on the floor where he had used vines to punch through the wood only a minute ago.

           Papyrus laughed to himself with a nervous look on his face.  “Oh, yes!  I see you are very strong!” he said.

           Flowey summoned several pellets, which spun around the skeleton for a moment.  He giggled.  “Very strong indeed,” he said.  “See for yourself!”  The magic bullets struck Papyrus who winced then fell to the floor as a spread of dust.  Flowey smirked then moved toward the open door.  Chilly air blew by his six petals as he exited the home.

           Sans stood on the path only a few yards away.  “Sup, Flowey,” he said.

           Flowey grinned.  “Howdy, Sans!  You’re still too LATE!  You could’ve shown up just two seconds earlier and Papyrus wouldn’t be DEAD!”

           Sans stepped closer to the flower, smiling as he usually did.  “Doubt it,” he said.  After this his eyes went completely dark.  He continued speaking with a low, threatening sort of tone.  “In either case, you’ve done too much.”

           Flowey snickered.  “Oh?  Are you finally gonna try to fight me?  It’s about t-”  Sans lifted his left hand from his pocket.  In doing so, he somehow grabbed a hold of Flowey and uprooted him from the snow.  Flowey gasped, glancing down at his twisted stem and little roots.  He was covered with deep blue magic.  A feeling of dread suddenly came over the flower and he wasn’t sure why.  Sans was just a pun making idiot.  Why did he feel as if something bad was about to happen?

           “Looks like I’ve already given you a warning,” said Sans.  He winked.  “Should’ve heeded it.”

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[tenebris-melodiam]

Enigma: Chapter 7 (Finale)

Pairing : Lucas Baker x Reader/Female Protagonist (18+) Rating & Warnings : None for this chapter                                                            Notes : This story will have multiple head-canons within it. It is also based solely on the Resident Evil 7 timeline, and takes place prior to the events of “Daughters.”                                                                                              Author’s Notes : Will be included for further explanation on some subjects

=7=

“Game over.”

The last thing Lucas remembered seeing was the masked face of the man who had bested him, and the barrel of a gun pointed directly at his head—well, what remained of his head, anyway. The light that followed the split-second sound of the gun firing off was brighter than any he had ever known, and it lasted longer than anything else he had ever experienced.

After what felt like years, the brilliant light that blinded him began to recede. Blobs of green, blue, and brown began appearing like splotches of paint that had been thrown onto a blank canvas. Eventually, the blobs began to take shape, and he realized that he was staring from the ground up—up into the foliage of trees that towered above him. He blinked slowly, unsure of what exactly was going on, but he eventually brought himself up into a sitting position to look around him. The land surrounding him was incredibly familiar, but it wasn’t until he noticed the large mansion behind him that he knew exactly where he was. He was sitting outside the gate that led into the estate. He rose to his feet, the pebbles and dirt under his shoes crunching beneath his shifting weight—how was he back home?

He padded to the front gate, which was oddly missing the chain-lock that typically hung around the two middle bars. He cocked his eyebrow slightly as he put his hand out to touch the metal, but hesitated for a moment; after gathering himself, he wrapped his fingers around the cold metal, and tugged the right side of the gate open. When he did, instead of the typical ear-piercing screech the rusting joints usually gave, the gate opened in near silence as it slid into place. There was still the occasional squeak of metal, but it was a blatant improvement from how it was prior to now. Lucas ran his eyes over the mansion once more, contemplating whether or not he wished to go further—what if nothing had changed? He eventually decided that he would go further, but as he took his first few steps forward, something caught his eye; in his peripheral vision, he saw someone sitting underneath the large oak that was still standing strong upon the left side of the yard.

He turned his attention in that direction, and felt his breath catch within his throat. (Color) hair fluttered about in the gentle breeze, and beautiful (color) eyes stared directly at him—eyes that he hadn’t seen for years. He watched as a tender smile crossed your lips, and he immediately felt drawn in that direction; the closer he got to the tree, the weaker his legs felt. He had seen this countless times before in his dreams, and each time he managed to get to you, you would vanish from his sight. This time though, when he dropped to his knees beside you, you didn’t simply blow away with the breeze. You continued staring at him, that same smile upon your lips.

With a trembling, hesitant hand, Lucas reached out in front of him and placed your cheek within the palm of his hand. You released a soft sigh at the feel of his skin, and pressed your cheek just a tad harder against his hand—he laughed quietly, and you saw the tears that welled up in his eyes as both hands now gently caressed your cheeks.

“I-I… I can touch you this time… “

You nodded your head, but didn’t say anything in response to him. He didn’t care whether or not you spoke; all he cared about was the fact that you were real this time. He could touch you, and he could hold you against him again. For the first time in years, the first time since that horrible night that you were torn away from him, Lucas found himself in tears. The one person that he had cared about more than any other was with him again, by some act of God, and that was all that he had wanted. Finally, he watched as you parted your loving lips, allowing your sweet voice to reach his ears for the first time in what felt like an eternity.

“I’ve been waitin’ for you for a long time, Lucas. I didn’t expect you to be here so soon, but that’s okay.”

When Lucas realized what you had said, he felt his chest heave—you had been waiting for him? All these years, and you had been waiting for him right here? That would mean that you knew of what he had become after you had gone, and what he had done even outside of Eveline’s control. A sudden, powerful surge of guilt washed over his entire body, and large droplets rushed down his cheeks and fell upon the grass beneath him. He bowed his head, his hands still holding on to your cheeks as he sat there and sobbed in silence. Finally, he managed to find the words that he wished to speak.

“Ain’t nothin’ I can do to atone for what I did… I know you probably saw what I did after you died, and there ain’t no excuse for it. Those damn thoughts took over me, and I just didn’t care no more… I let my desires run my life, even though I knew damn well what I was doin’ was horrible. I don’t know what I did to see you again, because I shouldn’t even be here… but I-“

He was stopped only by a finger being placed against his lips, and he glanced up with puffy eyes in your direction. The smile upon your lips was gone, and replaced by a look of both sadness and concern. Now it was your turn to tenderly hold his cheeks within your hands, and you tugged his head onto your chest before you decided to speak again.

“I know, Lucas. I know about everythin’ that you did. You hurt a lot of people, and a lot of it wasn’t your fault. But, even after being freed from Eveline… you were lost. Like you said, there isn’t an excuse for what you did, but the fact that it was the very first thing you said when you saw me leads me to believe that you truly are sorry. You could have played it off like nothin’ happened, but you didn’t. You recognized what you did. Someone who wasn’t sorry wouldn’t even think about doin’ somethin’ like that… even if it was in front of someone they love.”

You could feel him shaking upon your chest, and you leaned down to place a soft kiss upon his head. You knew he was scared, but in all honesty, you weren’t thinking any less of him than you had when you were still alive. You had witnessed what he had done, but you couldn’t bring yourself to hate him. What Eveline did to him was something that would traumatize anyone, especially someone like him—he took out his hatred for what she did on those who didn’t deserve it, and those who did. But, as you told him, the fact that he immediately owned up to everything that he had done without any kind of hesitation showed you that he did care about what he had done.

“She’s right, son. After all… you ain’t the only one who did some messed up things.”

Lucas perked up a bit upon hearing the deeper voice, and he turned his head to see his father walking down the stairs that led from the inside of the house. He made his way over to the oak, and then glanced behind him to see that Marguerite wasn’t far behind him.

“Mama? Dad? You guys are here, too?”

“That’s right. We got here a while before you did, son. And before I say anythin’ else, I wanna say how sorry I am. That girl made us do things to each other that we would have never done. Your mama and I… we’ve both done things that were horrible. So you’re not the only one who’s done bad things here.”

Jack dropped down, taking a seat upon the grass beside you and his son. Marguerite stood beside her husband, her hand resting gently upon his head as she sighed softly.

“Exactly. Whatever that little girl did to us was something we had no control over at all. We may not have acted on our own like you did, but that don’t excuse what we did, either. Jack and I should have been able to resist her, especially when it came to our family. But… we couldn’t. And you, Lucas, you suffered the worst out of all of us. Takin’ what your father and I did to you, havin’ Eveline take (Name) from you in such a horrible way… and everythin’ before that, too. We can’t say we’re proud of your actions outside her control, but we can say that we’re proud of you for comin’ forward about it and admittin’ what you did. You’re still our son, and we still love you, just like (Name) does.”

Lucas’s eyes wandered from his mother, to his father, and finally to you. He felt like such a child—being held by you whilst he was bawling his eyes out about what he had done. But hearing reassurance from those around him made him feel much better, and eventually, he managed to calm himself down. For a long while, you all sat around the tree in the front yard in silence, simply listening to the wind rustling the leaves of the trees around the estate. After a while, however, Lucas spoke.

“So then, what is this place?”

“Well, son… your mama and I think this is what was waitin’ for us after we passed on. The more we thought about it, the more clear it became to us—this is our own lil’ patch of Heaven. We had all we needed right here, so that’s where we came after we died. Look at the house, too. Ain’t nothin’ wrong with it at all now. I’m sure you noticed the gate don’t squeak any more, either.”

Lucas looked over at the estate, and as his father had said, there was nothing wrong with it at all. No cracks or splinters in the wooden beams that lined the house, the stairs that led up to the front door were no longer bent in from years of being walked on, and the windows were almost as though they were brand new. He hummed softly to himself, then turned his head slightly to be able to look up at you.

“I don’t care where we are, honestly. As long as I’m with you again, that’s all that matters to me.”

You gave a small smile, then leaned down to place a soft kiss upon the top of his head. He was right—as long as you were together again, that’s all that mattered to you. You rose to your feet, your hand gripping Lucas’s own as you tugged him upright alongside you. You didn’t know what the future would bring, if there was any future at all within this place. But if everything was to be like this forever, you most certainly wouldn’t mind it. Now together again with the family who loved you, save Zoe, the four of you began to make your way back into the estate. You had to admit it would be different without Zoe around, but you knew she would be along when the time was right.

Three years ago, everything changed for the worse. Now, you were right back where you left off before that day. And you couldn’t be happier.

=Fin=

Author’s Note (1): This ending was highly debatable—I was tempted not to do it, but then I figured I had tortured poor Lucas enough. I wanted to give him some kind of closure. That being said, I’d appreciate it if no arguments or whatnot erupted from exactly how this ended.

Author’s Note (2): Finding a way to justify Lucas’s actions after taking the serum was incredibly hard—so it ended up ending on a neutral note. It wasn’t condemned, but it wasn’t fully forgiven either.

Author’s Note (3): Jack is in this place after his passing caused by Ethan. If you haven’t played the End of Zoe DLC, stop reading here or risk being spoiled. I know that Jack is around in the DLC, but quite honestly, his conscious self died a long time ago. It was more so his body that survived as long as the DLC, rather than his soul and conscious.

Author's Note (4): Some might be wondering why I chose to have Lucas stay sane throughout most of the story, and the answer it quite simple. Meeting you changed everything. In the words of the "Daughters" DLC: "sometimes even a small, wandering step can change your course altogether." In this case, having you in his life gave Lucas a reason to resist his urges and temptations.

Author’s Note (5): Writing this story has truly been an experience. To all of you who have made it this far, I thank you. You guys have made writing this all the more fun, and I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. I love each and every one of you.

[hahanoiwont]

turn left writing prompt: 1. down for the count but the umbrella doesn't open so lup isn't there to help taako. 2. Stop Me but kravitz tells the crew that taako is trying to get himself killed

oh shit yeah I love it

send me a story and change one thing and I’ll tell you how it would have gone!

1. Taako just fucking dies. I set it up so Barry can’t get there in time, Taako is not capable of casting featherfall himself, he literally falls off the cliff and dies. Barry’s Real Fucked Up about it, but he was still falling fast enough to break the umbrella, so Lup’s here now, I guess. Magnus and Merle arrive to a corpse and two inconsolable liches. Barry feels terrible about it but he’s glad Lup is out, and Lup is so so frustrated at herself for not scraping up the energy to cast a level 1 fucking spell when her brother’s life depended on it.

Taako lives in the astral plane now. Lucretia takes it as evidence that she has to end this fast and sends the other two to Wonderland immediately, pretty much following canon timeline but with Taako kicking it in the Eternal Stockade while Kravitz tries to figure something out. Magnus and Merle are devastated, of course. They all kind of thought they’d be in it to the end. They don’t know why looking back, but they kind of felt like they were invincible. Even when he’s dead, they keep feeling like he’ll be there when they turn around. It’s a lot quieter now. Carey really tries to be there for Magnus but the three of them were family, you know? And Merle visits his kids and just. Holds them. It scares Mavis and he tries to act like nothing’s happened so he doesn’t freak them out.

They have a hard fuckin time of it for the first round of Wonderland. Magnus barely wants to live and Merle can’t keep it together all by himself. They’re doin Real Bad before Lup, who desperately wants to kill someone just to make the emptiness go away, fucking wrecks the place. Everyone in it except for Magnus and Merle die. They barely manage to save the Sterling crew too, but there are heavy injuries.

Meanwhile, something funny is happening in the astral plane. Taako’s been babbling about a sister when Kravitz knows full well he doesn’t have any family, and he keeps talking about something coming and Kravitz thinks whatever killed him must have fucked him up real bad, because he has no idea what it is, he just knows Taako died from it, and Taako is no pushover. But then he doesn’t have time to worry about it, because all of a sudden he’s drowning and everything is gone.

He thinks this is his eternity now, just drowning in oily darkness with no end in sight, when a light breaks through.

It’s Taako, and he’s kicking ass. They get to the Eternal Stockade and Taako is like, now do you believe me? Cause I fucking told you so. And they cling to each other for a bit. Taako catches Kravitz up on the end of the world. Kravitz has to take a moment. So that’s it, then? he thinks. This is the end? Taako’s going to disappear and I’m just going to end here?

Fuck no, says Taako, we’re gonna fucking beat this thing. And then a bright light shows Kravitz how Taako’s spent the last hundred years, and when he comes to Taako’s turning the floor into precious gemstones.

I appreciate you emulating the relic you created, Taako, very thematic, points for drama, good callback to how we met, but is now really the time?

Fuck off, I know what I’m doing. Gimme a hand here.

Between Lup in the Prime Material Plane and Taako and Kravitz in the Astral, they manage to open up a portal. Taako and Kravitz stumble out, Taako and Lup have a beautiful reunion, timeline follows canon.

In the end, Taako is dead, though. Like he’s very much not alive anymore and that’s not really, like, going away? He’s allowed to grow a body and have a second chance, but he looks at his options and, you know, he knows how elves age. He knows most of his companions are human. He decides he doesn’t want to be the last one standing while all his loved ones die around him. Bone zone’s not so bad, he says. I think I’ll stick around for a bit.

(Please don’t call it that, Kravitz says, pretending not to laugh)

Luckily for him, he’s got options. He’s the savior of reality, and also has shown some decent problem-solving skills and combat proficiency, so RQ wouldn’t mind giving him a position if he makes himself useful. He thinks about it. But really, he’s gotta go with Istus. Not that RQ isn’t cool and shit, just, death, you know? Black’s not his color. And fate is very much a part of the lives of each person who helped to save the world, so he gets to see his family. He spends a long-assed time as an emissary of Istus, and she tolerates his antics and only sometimes has to remind him that she could crush him with a thought. I’m tempted to say he convinces Magnus to also do that for a little? Partially bc I’m a sucker for reaper Julia (ooh or she could serve Istus too?) and also bc I think Magnus would be good at it.

2. Lup is kickin it with Magnus one day and some dude shows up. in her room. on the starblaster. Taako is going to kill himself, he says.

What the fuck, Lup says. Get the fuck out. Magnus hits him with a chair.

No actually, Taako is going to kill himself, he asked me to do it and I said no but he’s planning something really fucking stupid and you need to stop him, the dude says, but he’s wheezing a little bit so Magnus is satisfied. Got the wind knocked out of him.

You don’t know shit about my brother, says Lup, who has definitely seen the signs and is deeply into denial territory. She is handling it, she thinks, erroneously.

Kravitz tries Barry next, because Merle would be awkward, he doesn’t know Davenport, and Lucretia would probably be a bad idea. Barry takes one fucking look at him and nopes right out. He’s not dealing with this shit in his home where he can’t have collateral damage. Kravitz follows him to a randomly selected clearing planetside. Barry is ready to do that meme where you see something bad on the internet and you say to yourself, ‘wouldn’t want my lovely wife seeing this!’ and smash your computer with a hammer. Maybe light it on fire to be safe. You need to use all that extra gasoline somehow.

Kravitz does not have time for Barold J Bluejeans’s necromancer bullshit. Taako is literally trying to kill himself and like corrupt his soul somehow??? please. Like I don’t think your death crimes are what you have to worry about right now. We will definitely worry about those! but not right now.

Barry is intrigued by this. He is strongly against his dear friends committing suicide via horribly mutated arcane ritual. He doesn’t see why one of RQ’s people would come up with such an outlandish lie. He would like to know why Kravitz knows this, and also, why Kravitz knows who they are.

Kravitz, in this au, has not agreed not to talk about anything. He tells Barry everything. How he died, how Angus died, how Taako died, what he thinks must have happened after that. Barry does not say so, but he notes that they have a plan to defeat the Hunger now, and also apparently Taako has had that for at least a hundred years and said nothing??? okay, Taako. He must be missing something there.

Kravitz was honestly expecting Taako to have told the crew what’s what. He was a little disoriented when Taako told him no one knew. But now Barry knows, and he insists on telling Davenport, and once Davenport’s onboard it’s time to tell everyone else, and then they set up an intervention. They get all ready for it. They are waiting for Taako. He is late. He is later. He is very, very late. The sun is rising and he still has not come home. The sun is peaking and he has not come home. Lup is shooting massive amounts of anxiety-fueled fire into the sky and he still is not home.

Taako is gone. He has turned himself into the Prime Material Plane like a dumbass. In this au, they don’t have his notes and they don’t have anyone on the inside helping them. unless

Angus McDonald, 110 year old boy detective, is on the case. He is deeply frightened by quasi-sane definitely-dangerous Actual Plane Taako, but also Taako is his friend and he wants to help. He convinces Taako to come with him bc he wants to show him something. Zagged on ‘em, it’s actually an ambushtervention. Taako is forced to talk to his damned family, fucker, for once in your life. A non-bullshit solution is found but no spoilers for the actual fic. The whole Wonderland mess is averted and everyone is much less traumatized. Still kinda sucks tho, you haven’t unlocked Happy Ending.

There is actually one thing that could be changed that would make the whole thing happy, though. Keep trying!

[shawnjacksonsbs]

And at this point, in my time, its not just for me. Weird right??     9-15-19

So this week is significant, for me anyway. Tomorrow marks 1 year without  cigarettes, and the 19th marks 6 years off the dope. Six fucking years, just wow. For any of you who knew me before. . . It's super weird how it feels so far away, my using days I mean. I am like to the point where I have to remind myself that those days are my memories, not somebody else's. Although some might say I am a different person, I think that relinquishes too much of the responsibility that I need to hold on to, to keep me in check. I need some of that pain to remind me of just how much I have to lose. A lot of new people I have encountered over the last 6 years can't imagine me ever living like that, and it's even hard for me, sometimes, but I must never forget, not ever. I knew since this "anniversary" entry was coming up, for the last several weeks I had planned on writing about a comparison piece between me and the phoenix. Where I burn, and through the flames, I was reborn. lol Not entirely accurate, and the fire still smolders as I am still becoming more "me" with each passing day. Granted the biggest chances, I imagine, have already taken place. No new revelations in here. A brief update would be that both my older boys are on better tracks. Positive thoughts only as the fight to keep consistent in their commitments. No one knows when the last go 'round is for someone, so this could be theirs. I have the other two of my grandkids up here with me. They spent the night last night and we all slept in the living room on the futon. Not comfortable for me, at all. lol But it's nice. I watched all 3 of my grandchildren run around, literally in circles while screaming late last night. Overly excited little people, almost like a scene from Lord of the Flies without the bonfire in the middle of their circle. lol I got up extra early to be able to write this. I need to figure out breakfast soon. We are also going to Penguin Park later this afternoon, and probably Pizza Street for lunch and hot dogs on the grill this evening when the kids come to pick them up. Not a lot in this entry for it being an "anniversary" edition I know, but I will say that everything in my life for the last 6 years has brought me to this point in time, in my life, so I would be ready as a person to fulfill my role in the lives of my loved ones. Ready for the 1st night and day that I get to spend entirely with all of my grandkids! This is life. Also, for fun, I made a timeline of sorts, made exclusively of different song lyrics, from my using days all the way to now. I will share them at the bottom of this entry in chronological order. Want to know where I am just read them, but if you want to know who I am then you'll have to listen to them. Its all about how it feels for reals. lol My message is still the same, get away from the dope and the dumb shit. Hope for finding more silver linings, hang onto every little bit of gratitude that comes your way and watch as it multiplies.  Learn better ways to live that fit you as a person, as an individual. Learn to truly care about yourself, and then others, all others. Truly caring about others is the epitome for the meaning of life. The last little bit of my message, THE message is so important for everyone, to hear and practice, in my opinion. Until next week; 1 - "You always call me And ask me how I make it through the day I'm always fallin' I guess it's just god's way of making me pay But something makes me carry on It's difficult to understand, why I always wanna fly I do it for the drugs I do it just to feel alive" - Bottom of the Bottle by Smile Empty Soul 2 - "And every time I think I've finally made it, I learn I'm farther away than I have ever been before. I see the clock and it's ticking away. And the hourglass empty, what the fuck do I have to say? Please help me cause I'm breaking down. This picture's frozen, and I can't get out. Please help me cause I'm breaking down. This picture's frozen, and I can't get out of here. Believe me, I'm just as lost as you. Believe me, yeah, I'm just as lost as you. Keep it inside, the image portrayed. As if I couldn't stand losing. As if I couldn't be saved, no way. A small confession, I think I'm starting to lose it. I think I'm drifting away from the people I really need. A small reflection of when we were younger, we had it all figured out, cause we had everything covered." - Still Frame by Trapt 3 - "Once more I'll say goodbye to you Things happen but we don't really know why If it's supposed to be like this Why do most of us ignore the chance to miss? Oh, yeah Torn apart at the seams of my dreams turn to tears I'm not feelin' this situation Run away try to find that safe place you can hide It's the best place to be when you're feeling like Me (Me) Yeah (Yeah) All these things I hate revolve around me" - All These Things I hate by Bullet for my Valentine 4 - "Oh, dear mother, I love you I'm sorry, I wasn't good enough Dear father, forgive me 'Cause in your eyes, I just never added up In my heart I know I failed you But you left me here alone If I could hold back the rain Would you numb the pain 'Cause I remember everything If I could help you forget Would you take my regrets 'Cause I remember everything Oh, dear brother, just don't hate me For never standing by you or being by your side Dear sister, please don't blame me I only did what I thought was truly right It's a long and lonely road When you know you walk alone If I could hold back the rain Would you numb the pain 'Cause I remember everything If I could help you forget Would you take my regrets 'Cause I remember everything I feel like running away I'm still so far from home You say that I'll never change But what the fuck do you know I'll burn it all to the ground before I let you run Please forgive me, I can't forgive you now I remember everything" - Remember Everything by Five Finger Death Punch 5 - "What's life without a little pain The good thing is on a little break You'll be fine and up again, yeah The goal is to bring the human back to the world 'Cause nothing will last But bring it home as a friend, yeah yeah Oh the sinner is you The sinner is you I'm the collector of the good spirits of mother earth Hell is life drying up, yeah I see and hear more than I wish The seal has broken up again One life on earth fades away again The sinner is you, the sinner is you There's been a kill in the spirit world The ultimate sinner just don't know There's been a kill in the spirit world The ultimate sinner just don't know Is there forgiveness Do we all deserve our blessing Is there forgiveness Do we all deserve our blessing From the spirit world Is this a sign for all of us To take care of the life we have Please wake up and feel the love, yeah" - the Sinner is You by Volbeat 6 - "I'm awake I'm alive Now I know what I believe inside Now it's my time I'll do what I want 'cause this is my life Here, right here Right now, right now Stand my ground and never back down I know what I believe inside I'm awake and I'm alive I'm at war with the world cause I Ain't never gonna sell my soul I've already made up my mind No matter what I can't be bought or sold" - Awake and Alive by Skillet 7 - "This is my life Its not what it was before All these feelings I've shared And these are my dreams That I'd never lived before Somebody shake me 'Cause I must be sleeping Now that we're here It's so far away All the struggle we thought was in vain All in the mistakes One life contained They all finally start to go away Now that we're here it's so far away And I feel like I can face the day, and I can forgive And I'm not ashamed to be the person that I am today These are my words That I've never said before I think I'm doing okay And this is the smile That I've never shown before Somebody shake me 'cause I I must be sleeping Now that we're here It's so far away All the struggle we thought was in vain All in the mistakes One life contained They all finally start to go away Now that we're here it's so far away And I feel like I can face the day, and I can forgive And I'm not ashamed to be the person that I am today" - So Far Away by Staind 8 - "It's a beautiful mornin' I think I'll go outside a while, An just smile. Just take in some clean fresh air, boy Ain't no sense in stayin' inside If the weather's fine and you got the time. It's your chance to wake up and plan another brand new day. Either way, It's a beautiful mornin' Each bird keeps singin' his own song. So long I've got to be on my way, now. Ain't no fun just hangin' around, I've got to cover ground, you couldn't keep me down. It just ain't no good if the sun shines When you're still inside, Shouldn't hide, still inside, shouldn't hide, There will be children with robins and flowers; Sunshine caresses each new waking hour. Seems to me that the people keep seeing More and more each day, gotta say, lead the way, It's okay, Wednesday, Thursday, it's okay, Monday, Wednesday, Friday, weekday" - It's a Beautiful Morning by the Rascals 9 - "And it's a great day to be alive I know the sun's still shining When I close my eyes There's some hard times in the neighborhood But why can't every day be just this good It's been fifteen years since I left home I said good luck to every seed I'd sown Gave it my best and then I left it alone I hope they're doing alright Now I look in the mirror and what do I see A lone wolf there staring back at me Long in the tooth but harmless as can be Lord I guess he's doin' alright And it's a great day to be alive I know the sun's still shining When I close my eyes There's some hard times in the neighborhood But why can't every day be just this good" - It's a Great Day to be Alive by Travis Tritt 10 - "It's a beautiful day in this neighborhood, A beautiful day for a neighbor, Would you be mine? Could you be mine? It's a neighborly day in this beauty wood, A neighborly day for a beauty, Would you be mine? Could you be mine? I have always wanted to have a neighbor just like you, I've always wanted to live in a neighborhood with you. So let's make the most of this beautiful day, Since we're together, we might as well say, Would you be mine? Could you be mine? Won't you be my neighbor? Won't you please, won't you please, Please won't you be my neighbor?" Won't you be my Neighbor by Mr. Fred Rogers 11 - "In the end, as we fade into the night (whoa!) Who will tell the story of your life? In the end, as my soul's laid to rest What is left of my body? Or am I just a shell? I have fought And with flesh and blood, I commanded an army Through it all I have given my heart for a moment of glory In the end, as you fade into the night (whoa!) Who will tell the story of your life? (Whoa!) And who will remember your last goodbye? (Whoa!) 'Cause it's the end and I'm not afraid I'm not afraid to die I'm not afraid! I'm not afraid to die! Born a saint Though, with every sin I still wanna be holy I will live, again Who we are isn't how we live We are more than our bodies If I fall, I will rise back up and relive my glory In the end, as we fade into the night (whoa!) Who will tell the story of your life?" - In the End by Black Veil Brides