#who asked for life advice. not me you don't know what I'm doing with mine leave me alone

[bibiana112]

Everyone's always so mad over unsolicited criticism but you know what makes me furious? Unsolicited comfort. Me simply not expressing myself the same way as you is not a sign that I'm depressed and in desperate need for you to come to my rescue, it is not an invitation for you to act like my one pillar of reliability or to act like my friend when you do not know my life, do not know wether I do have support, do not know I chose to be in this position you feel so uncomfortable looking at and on god you just don't get to pity me for living my fucking life the way I want to

[trensu]

It's Will that gives him the idea.

"we don't really celebrate father's day anymore," he had said awkwardly, "but I can't hang out anyway."

"why not?" Dustin demanded. He was gonna end up bored and alone because he didn't celebrate the holiday and everyone else had plans. he had been counting on Will to keep him company.

"I'm gonna get Jonathan a new record and I want to listen to it with him," he said.

"can't he get his own records? C'mon, we could go to the arcade or something."

"no, Dustin," his tone took on a stubborn edge that made Dustin pause. "He's my brother and I love him, and he's the only guy besides Bob who's ever even tried to look out for me. So I'm sorry but I'm gonna be busy on Sunday."

Dustin didn't argue after that but it did get him thinking which is why on Sunday morning he biked all the way over to Loch Nora and started banging on Steve's door.

"what do you want, Henderson?" Steve sighed the most dramatic put upon sigh Dustin had ever heard.

"you're not my dad--"

"wow you really are genius!"

"shut up, shut up, listen to me!"

"okay, geez, I'm listening."

"you're not my dad and I don't want you to be my dad. I don't even really want a dad! Lots of dads aren't even that great and my mom already has the single parent thing down. But you taught me how to do my hair and how to talk to girls - even though that advice sucked, I didn't need it to get Suzie at all - and you're gonna teach me how to drive--"

"woah, hey, no I never said I'd do that, wh--"

"--and you've saved my life but I think we're even because I've saved your life too."

"Henderson don't you have anything better to do than harass me in my own home?" Steve said. he was using that exasperated tone he got when he knew he wasn't keeping up with what was going on but didn't want to admit it.

"actually no I don't but I'm here for a reason," he reached into his backpack and took out the gift he clumsily wrapped with scraps of brown paper bags. He shoved it into Steve's hands. "You're basically the only adult male figure in my life. And I appreciate you."

Steve squinted at the gift and then at Dustin and at the gift again before he said fussily "is this a prank? If something gross explodes from this, I swear to god, I'll--"

"Just open it, Steve!"

"Fine, fine, keep your shirt on," Steve said and tore off the paper. He blinked and in a softer tone said, "Oh."

"I don't know if you even like making models but I know you love cars and this kit looked just like yours, so yeah."

Steve stared at the kit some more. Dustin started to fidget. It was always better to be honest with your feelings but maybe this was too much for Steve. Maybe Steve didn't like him as much as Dustin did. Steve was not as enlightened about these things as Dustin.

"I've never made a model before."

Dustin hunched his shoulders and tried not to feel stupid or hurt. He should have expected this. They weren't even related. This was probably too weird. He reached out to take the gift back.

"it's fine, I can return it, whatever."

Steve raised the kit out of Dustin's reach.

"Hey, this is mine," he said.

"you don't even like it!"

"I never said that! I'm just gonna need a dweeby little nerd to help me build it. You know anybody like that?" Steve asked, batting his eyes innocently.

"you're such a dick," Dustin grumbled, fighting back a grin.

"watch your language!"

"shut up, you're not my dad."

Steve laughed as Dustin shoved his way into the house. Hours later, after much shouting and ribbing and one incident of spilled paint, a small model of the beemer was left to dry while Steve forced Dustin to watch the baseball game on TV with him. It wasn't the worst thing ever, and after Steve mentioned the statistics involved, it got way more interesting ("of course you'd like the math part, you weirdo" "you don't understand the stats do you" "shut up and watch the game, Henderson"). When the paint was dry, Dustin followed Steve upstairs and watched him carefully and deliberately place the model between a couple of sports trophies.

"yeah, I guess it looks pretty cool," Steve said with exaggerated nonchalance. "Now beat it, kid. your mom's gonna freak if you're not home when she gets back from work."

"can you give me a ride?"

"ugh, fine."

Dustin grinned. This had been, hands down, the best father's day ever. From the look on Steve's face when he placed the model, Dustin was pretty sure he agreed.

[mariaelenaariente]

Astro Observations - Placements I Adore

The pictures used are not mine Have your chart analyzed by me Learn natal astrology

Sagittarius placements - I have to admit I have a soft spot for all the mutable placements out there, but Sag... especially Moon and/or Mercury/Mars... y'all are insanely intuitive (big plus if you ask me), courageous, open minded (unless the native is unevolved and choosing the "I'm the only one who knows the truth so let me impose it on you" path), and just generally such a great vibe. I've always strugged to put my admiration for this energy into words because it's just... so great ugh

1st/7th/10th/11th house Venus - these people are generally so well-liked it's crazy. They have just the right type of natural charm about them that draws people in, and I'm here for it. They're charismatic, generally social and outgoing, and perceived in such a romantic light by the public.

Taurus and Leo placements - if you have both Taurus and Leo placements in your chart you've won the astrological lottery as long as I'm concerned. These two signs are each the culmination of something special - for Taurus, it's good taste, appreciation of nature, and food, animal love, fragrances. For Leo, it's creativity, joy, life, loyalty, and general warm infatuation with life - does this make sense to anybody else?

1st/4th/7th/10th house Mars or Saturn - Yes this energy isn't easy and needs a lot of attention and mastering from the native, so seeing it in full force, especially in someone who fully mastered it, is rare. BUT! An angular Mars or Saturn is so powerful and incredibly fascinating to observe. Tapping into this energy, if you happen to have it in your birth chart, is a game changer. EDIT: You need to consider your whole chart when trying to master this energy. If you wish to hear my input, I have an affordable one-question chart analysis available.

8th house Venus or Jupiter - They attract support and help with such ease. They get whatever they wish for. Others will easily show up for them whenever they need and they easily benefit from the people in their life (not in a manipulating type of way).

12th house Moon - another tough placement, however - once the native gets in touch with this energy and learns to use it for their benefit and spiritual growth, there's no stopping them. Possibly the most intuitive, spiritual, healing placement I have ever observed. They're in touch with their subconscious which makes any type of work on themselves much smoother.

Gemini placements - if you actually believe Geminis to be two-faced, you don't know what you're missing out on. The chameleons of the zodiac, these placements can talk their way out or into pretty much anything. They'll mirror your own energy back to you so maybe if you can't stand them it's time to do some inner work.

Prominent Neptune - dreamy, ethereal, spiritual, intuitive, poetic, and artistic - what more can I say?

Cancer Mercury - They'll intuitively know what you need and show up for you. They'll also destroy your life and burn your house to the ground if you cross them. Love that for them.

Virgo Sun - Virgos are underrated. I'm tired of all the neat-freak stereotypes, they carry such strong intellectual energy. They can easily get on top of most situations by simply following their instincts. They'll give you awesome advice based on the many rabbit holes they've gone through in the past five days online. They'll be there for you when you need them. Also, there's a strong sexual energy here I rarely see anyone talk about, so I could make a post about it if anyone's interested.

[inkskinned]

im gonna start a fight; and, at the same time, i need you to take this in the most good-faith way possible, but:

videos that involve body-checking and intentionally (and uncritically) show a mealplan of an unhealthy number of calories are just a revamped version of pro-ana food diaries.

and yeah, i know there's arguments. i address some of them under the cut. but at the end of the day, we're just coming back to romanticizing mental illness; we've just found a better platform for it.

this is already something we've done. we knew it was wrong and tried to stop it. and tbh. it just wasn't enough.

there are people who argue "well, what if you have an eating disorder, you can't help it if you don't eat!" except that as someone with an ED; we are not infants. we know what we're doing. part of having an ED is that you are like, maybe too self-aware. even if we can't help our own food choices, we don't need to fucking romanticize the disorder - something we've been warning you about since 2013. there are hours of setup, filming, and editing that go into these videos. they do not happen to fall into place randomly. there is a reason they are pieced together to be beautiful, bright, inspiring.

there's this woman who pretty much only posts daily plans under a normal amount of calories, and everyone defends her saying but it's better than nothing! and i'm like. except she opens those with images of her showing off her body and provides no context in the video or caption that suggests that she believes what she's doing is unhealthy. she has hundreds of thousands of followers on a platform designed for young kids and teens. i refuse to believe that by accident her content just happens to be cheery advice on "healthy" versions of starving.

for any other symptom of mental illness, we would be incredibly enraged by this kind of placid acceptance of a "tips and tricks" fast-start guide. imagine if people posted pink & pretty videos saying "best places to cut yourself" as if it was a fucking storytime. we, as a society, are so fucking fatphobic that we would rather accept blatantly harmful displays of self harm than admit that we are obsessed with a hyper-thin body type.

i am not suggesting someone never talks about their disorder. i talk about mine. actually, it's a plot point in my book.

here's the difference: i recognize it's a fucking mental illness. i am very careful to never mention a specific weight, eating pattern, or calorie plan. i always make sure to position it as something that ruined my fucking life. i do not put cheery music in the background and hearts and sparkles over my worst moments. i do not film it in bright light. i do not start each passage with an image of a thin body followed by "here's how to look like her."

eating disorders should not be framed as aspirational. and the problem is that society worships the "after" image, so long as you don't get too sick. there is a reason so many people who quit being "influencers" will later admit - i wasn't eating well that whole time; an obsession with food was completely destroying my life.

we let any uncredited, uncertified person write the most backwards, fucked up shit about how to get the body you desire! because the underlying, secret belief is: well, at least they're thin! and the real thing that fucking gets me each time - they make fucking money off of it. their irresponsibility and societal harm literally pays off for them.

"why do you care so much." "don't like it don't look." "so what if people experiment with new ways of thinking of food?"

thank you for asking. we're about to get extremely personal. it's because when i was 18 i discovered "thinspiration"/"thinspo." and it absolutely influenced, shaped, and codified my pre-existing eating disorder. i went from having some troubling habits and traits to being incredibly unwell within what felt like a matter of days. there were actual pages designed to train me on how to have an ED correctly. it was all so suddenly easy. i was sick; and the nature of the illness meant - i wanted to be sicker.

it takes an average of 7 years for a person to fully recover. i know this personally - even now, 10 years from the worst of it, i still fucking struggle. i am so much happier now and i eat what i want and i literally don't think about food at all (19 year old me would shudder) and yet - i still fucking know the calories of plain toast with butter.

an eating disorder is one of the deadliest types of mental illness. over 1 in 4 people with an ED will attempt suicide.

and i'm sorry. i just do not see the exchange rate of "high rate of engagement" versus "the value of a human life."

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

the crowleying of your mascot's hair.

Good morning maggots, as I write this it is 11:53 pm on the uh, asmi10kpocalypse/10khaos (both stunning names, whichever of you came up with them please walk on stage and take a goddamn bow) and I have awoken from deep slumber.

The Good News: My hair is dyed! The Bad News: It was torture that I nearly fainted from!

Okay well uh, we know what I'm best at, and it's summaries of chaos. So without further ado (much ado about nothing ahahah everything is a 10k reference now), here we go:

It starts, as it will end, in my room in front of the laptop screen.

Now, as you know, I said I would dye my hair after I scarfed down my lunch. I do that and I also take a nap because fuck yeah, sleep.

I check tumblr one last time, grab my phone without charging it, tell my mum I'm dyeing my hair, and begin the walk to the salon.

On my phone is Arthur, @howmanyholesinswisscheese, who as a cishet deadbeat dad of a lot of us, is the worst person to ask for hair advice, but I do it anyway. I need a reference photo for a haircut.

Arthur helpfully scours the internet and comes up with options that include: Gay, hot history teacher, Joe Locke but something's off about it, same as above but different slightly and I can't place it, top 20 haircuts for crazy people, top 100 teen boy haircuts for teens, mullet slash hot history teacher, Hozier, why does the teen boy have a beard, Aussie AFL player, and Chris Hemsworth.

His words, not mine. Does anyone want to check in on Arthur's history teacher because I am getting very concerned for that man.

So I pick a haircut and land up at the salon. Arthur also tells me my hair is wild and I have needed a haircut for too long. Thanks dad.

The hairdressers are not pleased when I point to the red shade and tell them to bleach and dye my entire hair.

They inform me it will look like shit.

They keep asking if I'm sure. I say, with increasing annoyance, that yes I am.

Arthur is in the phone enabling me, yelling that I need to do it for crowley and "THEY DON'T GET TO TELL YOU WHAT TO DO"

The hairdressers then say they're out of red hair dye, I can either do a magenta or come back the next day.

Arthur tells me to leave and go to another salon.

So I do, and I wind up at the salon right next door (Arthur and I cheer for capitalism), an extremely seedy looking place with a poorly painted stairwell that could well be haunted.

I tell the hairdressers there what I want, and they also argue with me about how it will fade, look like shit, etc etc.

Arthur says "THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT, THEY'RE JUST HAIRDRESSERS"

He tells me that if Crowley can keep the Bentley together through hellfire through sheer will, I can do the same for my hair.

Finally, they huddle in front of a laptop, muttering, and agree to take me on.

I am then also hair-shamed by the stylist, who tells me in no uncertain terms that if I don't cut my hair as soon as it grows out even slightly, it looks "kharab", which is Hindi for... 'substandard, inferior, bad, shoddy, deficient'. Thanks, mate.

The haircut is done. What follows then is on of the top five most excruciatingly painful experiences of my life.

No, I'm serious. The bleaching and dyeing. It was. Fuck.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

JUST THE MEMORY HURTS

OKAY NEXT PART OF THE SAGA I WILL REBLOG THIS IT IS GETTING TOO LONG

IF YOU WANT THE HAIR REVEAL THEN YOU WILL HAVE TO SIT THROUGH THIS LIKE I DID, I'M AFRAID

[ksnfangz]

EPISODE ONE — FATE | PROLOGUE

New year, Same Crush, Same friends, Same Grades, and what’s this? A new handsome face!

Y/n L/n was well known for her bright and bubbly personality, the cheerful girl always smiling and jumping around throughout the school day despite her low scores, and the mean comments made by her classmates about her loudness or existence within their school.

She is also known for her very obvious crush on the school's golden boy Yang Jungwon. The girl does little to nothing to hide the fact that she likes said boy. Even mustering up the courage to confess during their freshman year.

" Jungwonie ~ I like you." you smiled voice pitched a bit higher than usual, eyes shimmering under the bright sunlight. A simple " I am not interested." is all you received in response as the boy walked away leaving you to sweep by yourself.

However, the rejection didn't at all phase Y/n. You were a determined woman and you wouldn't let Jungwon's rejection stop you from crushing– it had become a part of your daily life at this point.

So here you are a year later and still as in love as you were a year prior. Only now you and Jungwon were part of the same friend group. Thanks to your best friend Sunghoon who had become good friends with Jungwon over the Summer. And the final cherry on top was that Jungwon sat at the desk to your right so you could stare at him freely without being called out by their teacher or straining your neck... again.

" Y/nnie~ Guess what! your best friend is going to be one of the top idols in Korea soon." Sunghoon brags sitting himself in the seat to your left. The male had been your best friend since kindergarten so now you were stuck dealing with his randomness forever.

" Yeah, I'll believe it when I see it." you reply eyes never leaving the boy sitting to your right. Smiling as you watch him write down notes from his textbook. No wonder he's at the top of the class, he never stops studying.

" Hey you may doubt me now but I know about 10 companies that would beg to have a face like mine under their label." Sunghoon is about to continue his rant when he feels a tap on his shoulder.

Kim Sunoo.

Kim Sunoo was pretty cute for a guy, very smart, sometimes mean and a bit scary but that just made Sunghoon even more interested. How could someone with the face of a baby be so tough and outspoken?

" Sunghoon hyung you're in my seat!" the boy claims foxlike eyes staring into Sunghoon's widening round ones.

" Oh yes! sorry." The park boy apologizes before moving to the desk behind Sunoo. " Thank you!" the boy said sending Sunghoon one of his usual bright smiles as he sat down in his newly acquired seat. There were no assigned seats but Sunoo knew he wanted to sit beside you this year to make sure he could help you if necessary and because you were a pleasure to be around.

" Yah Kim Sunoo your hair! it looks great, I am jealous." Y/n whines playful pout resting upon her lips as she admires the boy's dark red hair. " Wonyoung dyed hers blonde! I’ve heard that's Jungwon a type." Sunoo whispers. Y/n sighed she had been wanting to dye her hair for ages but her mother would kill her if she ever put color anywhere near her hair. People like Sunoo and Wonyoung were very lucky. Y/n watches as said girl talks to Jungwon with her doll-like smile and flowing blonde locks.

" Do you think I would look good blonde?" The girl asks looking back at Sunghoon. "Of course not!" earning an eye roll from y/n and a smack on the arm from Sunoo that leaves him softly rubbing at the area. “ow.”

" You'd look beautiful with any hair color y/n don't let this fool give you any advice. He once got bleach and dye mixed up and almost went bald!" Sunoo laughs.

" I'm starting to think all the bleach went to his brain." Sunoo adds grabbing his notebook from his book bag.

" Hey! My scores are pretty good in my opinion." Sunghoon argues. " Doing good on the exam is one thing but remembering the information is another Hoon." Sunoo replies.

“ yeah well, I don’t see you offering tutoring sunshine.”

“ as if I’d waste my time tutoring you.”

" Will you two quit flirting in front of me please it's disgusting." Y/n sighs turning her attention back to the cat-eyed boy in front of her. Completely missing the way both of her friend's cheeks flushed in embarrassment.

" Yeah well, why don't you wipe the drool off of your lip and pay attention for once?"

" Yang Jungwon is far more entertaining than whatever Mr.Lee is teaching." Y/n responds her smile growing as she rests her chin in her hands. Of course, you should be paying attention to the lesson since your English grade was a bit low for your parents liking but you’d rather spend your time studying jungwons face than studying the English language.

" Y/n L/n."

The girl snaps out of her trance eyes widening. All eyes shifted towards her. "Please come write the sentence that Wonyoung Just read!" Mr.Les says gesturing towards the freshly wiped chalkboard. Slowly standing from her seat y/n timidly makes her way to the board.

I lost everything, I became a monster that can't die, but now I know what I have to do, Follow the blood token...

The girl freezes what was the last word again she thinks to herself trying to recite the poem in her head again,

how do you even spell that word is it an F or Ph....

English is stupid.

"Fate," says an unfamiliar voice. The chalk is removed from her hands as the unfamiliar male finishes the sentence. Y/n looks up at the boy silently thanking him with her eyes. The boy smiles before turning to face the class.

" he's handsome" "Is he the new transfer from Japan?" " how's he so tall?" I heard he's good at basketball... even better than Lee Heeseung " "No one is better than Lee Heeseung"

" Everyone let's quiet down and give our new student a chance to introduce himself. Y/n you may return to your seat." Mr.Lee says. the girl quickly made her way back to her desk dusting the chalk off of her hands.

" Hello everyone my name is Nishimura Riki, you can all call me Ni-ki, I'm from Japan, and I like sports." The male— Ni-ki informs, the class once again breaking out into small conversations as the male walks to the only empty seat which happens to be right behind y/n.

The boy softly tapping the girl's shoulder to get her attention. "Fate," the boy says once again, showing the word engraved cover of his journal. " Guess I got lucky." he smiles earning a small chuckle from the girl. Completely unaware of the pair of eyes that were lingering on the two.

A/N ; short first chapter i’ll try to make the next ones longer! I just wanted to get the introduction out of the way. Please let me know if you see and spelling errors, or the name soojin anywhere this was originally an x OC! || next update may take a while i just go a surgery done and the medicine makes me very sleepy

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[hedgehog-moss]

Salut madame hedgehog moss!

Maintenant je me prépare à déménager à une toute petite ville au nord-est des États Unis près de la frontière avec Nouveau Brunswick (donc une ville peu peuplée et très rurale). Maintenant j'habite dans une grande ville alors je suis certaine qu'il y aura un peu de décalage au début. Je sais que t'as déménager de Paris vers une très petite village donc peut être tu as des conseils pour comment je peux m'intégrer dans une telle communauté?

Désolé pour des fautes de grammaire. Le français n'est pas ma langue maternelle.

Hi! Your French is really good! :)

I'm not sure I'm the best person to ask for advice on how to fit in with a small rural community, as I chose to live in the woods a few km away from the nearest village because I moved to the countryside in search of solitude. I only leave my lair for groceries once every ten days or so—I'm on a solid "easy friendly small talk" basis with most locals, but I'm only better acquainted with a handful of them, the ones I interact with regularly by force of circumstance (the librarian because I'm a devoted library-goer, the postwoman, the farmer who owns the pasture next to mine...) and that's a level of integration in the community I'm happy with.

I suppose the main thing is to show curiosity and appreciation for the local way of life, rather than expect to live exactly the way you did in the city, but the specifics of what this entails vary a lot depending on locality. Participating in the local small economy, if there is one, is good—I try to attend the yearly events and fairs at the village, like the potter's market; I bought a jumper from the wool shop in town rather than ordering something online, and I buy fruit at the summer market and seedlings for my garden, and some cheeses, from the local farms that sell them, rather than getting stuff from the supermarket even though it would often be more convenient. But I'm glad there are still family farms and local artisans so it's important to support them. There's also a thriving informal gift economy in my village, I offer eggs from my chickens and homemade jams or syrups and later down the line neighbours reciprocate with seedlings or firewood, etc, the more you'll participate in this sort of thing (if it exists) the more connections you'll make.

Another thing re: being appreciative of the local way of life—I know the city people who are disliked around here are the ones who buy land and use it like they would a suburban plot, e.g. build a swimming-pool, mow the grass, remove all 'weeds' indiscriminately (I know brambles are annoying but birds nest in there and eat the berries, you've got to leave some...), or cover their dirt road with asphalt instead of just shovelling some gravel when it gets muddy, etc. Again the specifics vary depending on locality, but people are attached to their local landscapes and way of doing things and as someone who owns some land and has seen the way locals reacted to other people who bought land around here, you're clearly perceived differently if you have a spirit of maintaining and repairing and appreciating the place for what it is, rather than remodelling and innovating and adapting it to what you want it to be.

Also you've got to accept that it can take a very long time to become part of a close-knit community, and try not to take things personally—I remember someone commenting on one of my posts a few years ago that she felt rejected by the people in her village because she was still seen as an outsider, and not allowed to take part in the organisation of some local events, several years after moving there. I wouldn't see not getting to help organise an event as a hostile behaviour towards me, I don't really expect to be included on every level, if locals feel like some things are for people who've lived here their whole lives, okay. I know rural communities are not the most diverse places and I'm not saying to accept discrimination due to bigotry of any kind, but in terms of "being kept out of some things or treated differently because you're not from this specific place", I do see it as something to be accepted. If I'm still seen as a city person and an outsider twenty years from now, so be it, as long as people aren't outright rude about it. I don't think of not being welcome to everything as rude, there are just boundaries that exist and so be it. I'm not saying someone would be wrong for being hurt by this type of exclusion, just that it helps to have this "don't take it personally" attitude when moving to a rural village.

Having a llama also really helps! The only reason I got acquainted with lots of local people in my first year here was because Pampe kept running away and I kept having to knock on people's doors with like a photo of her and go hi, have you seen this criminal. And then people would stop me at the grocery shop or something two weeks later like, did you end up finding your criminal? And I'd complain about her and they'd sympathise and tell me about their own annoying animals. I can't recommend animal misdemeanours enough as a source of friendly mutual understanding with rural neighbours.

Oh and speaking of complaining—another obvious way to integrate in a small community is to fight together against a common enemy. This is anecdotal but last year a state-owned company started to build a metallic structure (I'm trying not to be too specific) outside the village and it spoilt the landscape a bit, and I hesitated to grumble about it when making small talk because I was half-expecting to come across as an annoying city person, complaining about aesthetics while local people's livelihoods would be improved by this thing—but not at all, people also hated the look of it and were like "they hardly even consulted local authorities on this, they think we don't get to have an opinion on what our land looks like" and we went to the town hall to complain and the mayor agreed with us and eventually we complained enough that the company replaced the metal parts with wooden ones, so it at least looks more natural and more discreet in the landscape. It was very satisfying to come together and have this happen, and I never felt more integrated in the local community than when I was in the town hall complaining with everybody else.

[candiid-caniine]

Hey! Long time no see, i know i said id send you a fantasy i thought you'd like but now ive forgotten almost all of it, oop!

Life happened, and uh, i saw that you mentioned your libido being a bit low, which definitely is my case too (im recovering from depression, now that im okay id love to get my FULL libido back, or at least a good percentage of it) do you have any tips on that?

Also any recs of blogs writing in the same vibe as you? (same-ish kinks would be nice but im specifically looking for queer inclusive stuff!) it makes me 10x hornier than the regular video/photo porn!

Hope you're well, you pathetic little thing!

💫

hi friend!! ugh i feel you. sorry i haven't got any advice on regaining ur libido...we just let mine wax and wane as it will, though denial has been a big help in keeping it steady!

i've heard good things abt ginseng and some other herbs. obvs use at your own risk, mind that some herbal treatments can cross-interact with certain medications, remember that pre-packaged supplement pills are often unregulated and may contain toxins, and be aware that some herbal remedies work better on pw certain anatomy than others, and finally that many herbal remedies considered to increase libido are largely untested on trans folx!

finally, sorry it's taken so long to answer this ask...i'm autistic and have been cataloguing lol. i present to you a list of other blog recs under the cut, organized by general vibe! i've tried to primarily include blogs that do their own posts rather than those who primarily reblog :)

note that my headings may provide some context as to what to expect, but you read at your own risk and each blog will typically have its own trigger warnings addressed in the header/pinned. additionally, i've not tagged some of the ppl below because they prefer that "Men DNI" blogs not interact, and idk if "no cis men" qualifies ahah!

all blogs below are queer- and/or trans-inclusive, if not exclusive! there is no detrans/misgendering, at least I don't think - i don't tend to follow those blogs.

hard kinks (blood, knives, etc; includes primarily-cnc blogs):

@puppy-mommy , who also does general t4t kink content, but does state untagged hard kinks!

@visciousest is someone whose blog i scroll when i'm in a Certain Mood ahah,, i won't elaborate

@hell-hound-bites: just. fuck. would drool on his knife blade.

@snuff-fag: its username should give you fair warning as to how wild its content tends to get, so please browse responsibly.

@condor-bait is taking a break right now, and all my love is with him as he takes care of himself. he made me feel so valid and so fuckable as a young trans person learning to love myself in a new way, and i've always been too shy to tell him how much his content meant to me one-on-one (yes, despite its often-extreme themes!), and he deserves as much time as he needs to heal!

@unwillingfvckpuppy for mostly cnc and medical kinks! if you like his style, but not so much their harder content, he also has a more-tame main blog--i just mainly follow/scroll this one!

@vampvictim: top-tier cnc/intox stuff, plus some great knife/bloodplay :)

@cryptidtid is wonderful and holy shit i follow a lot of hard kink blogs lol. incredible

@cnc-pet: i have been following her for a long ass fucking time lol. they post a lot of really good cnc and stories, but you'll also find a lot of aftercare tips and advice on her blog! i really admire blogs who try to balance horny content with best practices

@dollobotomy

general kinky content:

@excessively-queer . just plain old good shit :) there's a good amt of edging and degradation.

@clouded-king was honestly one of my earlier introductions to the queer/t4t kink community on here and how fucking euphoric it can be :) he posts some hard kinks, but generally it's a balance of a lot of different kinks so read his pinned at your leisure!

@ / cottontailx : just good kinky nsft posts :)

@ / digitalpenetration: often specifically t4t which i love!!

@femmelovefemme can step on me :)

@bigothteddies: could not build this section w/o mentioning him :) they had a big influence on my fantasies for a long time!

@hazelj-xoxo: bigtime want her to cuck me. have followed her across multiple blog deletions lol

@transpidered is forever an icon!

@subspaceemo

@writefinch for great stories and text posts

edging and denial, specifically:

@6irlpet is 1 of my go-to hands-down-pants scroll sessions :)

@droolkink is my inspiration!

@flustersluts does exactly what the name implies lol. a good helping of other kink content too :)

@puppycvnt is a 10/10!

@barkwoofbarkwoofbark: we r denial friends imo!!

@strawbrrysub

@blyssful-abyss

@urhighnessbitch is a big fav <3

non-detrans genderplay:

@butchviolence does amazing butch supremacy stuff and i,,, fucking hell. even just seeing their username puts me in a Particular state of mind ahah. they also post hard kinks so be aware as you proceed!

@mtfdomme: i literally just reblogged from her today lol. tbh i want to be their little stupid pupthing. it's not all transfem supremacy undertones/overtones, but that's what i mainly follow her for, plus just general t4t goodness! also, their general personality? and the way she shuts down people who disrespect their boundaries? huge inspiration for me!

@cuntboydestroyer: take me to the animal shelter and neuter me. good lord.

@the-kind-of-dame is the main inspiration for my recent genderplay post lol

@terfbreaking-tgirl (be warned of dykebreaking if that's an issue for you)

@barbarian-lesbian is my other inspiration for the recent genderplay post

@superiorineveryway

weird asf (/complimentary; my favorite type of shit. robots, ND-focused posts, etc):

@specksizedgoddess has introduced me to things i didn't know, like...existed, and that's saying a lot as one of my special interests is kink! never knew how down bad i was to be a tiny buggirl, nor how much i wanted to be someone's stupid little robot... BIG tw tho: there is snuff and gore content here, so proceed with caution if you don't wanna see that!

@sapphling fucked me up real good with some bird!sub bondage posts awhile back lol

@nobelisha: found them through their ghost cnc post so that's why they're in this category ahah! they don't have a pinned so proceed w awareness :)

@devout-cleric: hierophilia/religion kink, and i'm something of an acolyte of hers :) if you've read this far down you may as well know i'm her Little Lamb anon lol

piss/omo:

@latenightomo

@pissheartmybeloved - their URL makes me crack up every time, plus good content!

@hold-it-a-little-longer - good scenarios/imagines!

@ohmyrashi - (i think) my original intro to omo!

monsterfucking/terato:

@septimus-moonlight was my first real introduction to trans-positive terato and i've never settled for half-fun cis-oriented terato ever since :) mind tags!

@eggedbellies as well!

@bredpun doesn't appear to be active lately but still good for a scroll!

@steamandcream

@of-mutts-and-men

[kedreeva]

as someone who is ace and entering college years, how has your dating life been as an ace? what other struggles have there been that you have advice for? i dont know any aces or similar around me older or otherwise. thank you for your time and i hope you have an easy day!

Okay this will get a little long so I'll put it behind a cut

Honestly I'm probably not the best person to ask, since I never really...struggled? Not specifically with asexuality or with anything related to it. I can tell you my experiences, though, and you can decide if there's anything worthwhile to take away from it!

I grew up in a house run by science and math. I knew the prefix a- meant without/not and I knew there was heterosexual and bisexual and homosexual, so when young and, importantly, before really ever interacting with other queer folk, I went Ah ha, these are (prefix)(sexual) and so therefore I am asexual (without sexuality), and that was that. That was literally all the thought I gave to it. People had crushes on other people, I didn't have crushes on people, end of story. If, for some reason, I developed a crush on someone, I would deal with it then.

Maybeeeee midway through HS, a very good friend of mine asked me about it, and I said well, some people like everyone the same, and I dislike everyone the same. And she said well, then it sounds like you like everyone the same, that amount is just zero, so that seems like bisexual? (she didn't know the term asexual was an actual sexuality term either at that point, just the biological term for reproduction and, well, I could reproduce theoretically so couldn't be that) And I said well, alright then, and called myself bisexual for the next 6 or 7 years. THEN I found out asexuality is a sexuality not just a mode of reproduction and I said Ah Ha, I was Correct, and that was that again.

So I guess if I was offering advice it would be... you know you. Don't let someone else tell you about you if you think they're wrong. Make up a word if there isn't one. Use a new word if you find one that already exists and fits.

Also, that it's fine to not worry about it. Literally it's fine to just never think about it if you have better things to do. I think a lot of people get really wrapped up in finding the right label and/or "what happens if-" when like... you're not a canned good. You don't need a label. Worry about what-ifs when they come up, don't borrow anxiety if you can help it.

I dated a few people in HS, like... three people I think, and one Almost. One predatory mistake I thankfully recognized (HEY because I had older folks online I could talk to about it!) and got out of quickly, and one hot mess relationship that was a LOT of fun- my boyfriend, Sark, and then his ex-girlfriend, and then I stepped out so they could get back together, and then they said wait no, and invited me back in, and that went on for most of the end of HS, and nearly into college, when I stepped out again (and peacefully, I am still friends with both of them and I married Sark in the end). There was one guy whom I was always, perpetually, extremely fond of, and we hung out a lot, kissed once, and I think we would have had a lot of fun dating, but ultimately it was a near miss that became a fond memory, because we were never in the right place together. Sometimes life does that, and that's okay, too.

In college, I simply didn't date anyone. I had better things to do. I met my best friend, @idkfandomwhatever, online that year (and still talk to her almost daily, sometimes for hours, despite that we are on opposite sides of the world!!), and in person @mishapeep who was the best roomie I ever had (hi!!!!! i love you!!!). I had great friends, I went on a TON of adventures, worked a cool job where I had awesome coworkers, and just all around had a blast learning stuff and napping in sunbeams or on couches at the food court. A couple of guys made passes, and I turned them down because I just wasn't into it, and we remained friends. There was one coworker at my dispatch job that I got along with like a house on fire, and everyone ELSE thought we should be dating, but neither of us ever brought it up- I can't say why he didn't for sure, but I know I never brought it up because I was 85% sure he didn't swing for the right team to date me, which I ALSO never brought up until he found me on facebook years later to tell me about his husband running for local election somewhere. so. again, don't let anyone else tell you what to do lol there was ALSO another guy that I had NO interest in that spent a lot of time around me, but we mostly sat in my bunk watching Queer as Folk, which I KNOW was his first exposure to queer material. I never talked about queer stuff with him otherwise, but I heard from a mutual friend of ours that he's also happily married to his husband. Sometimes just being yourself, openly and without shame about it, does more than you think, even if it's not doing anything directly for you (but it is, it's good for you too).

SINCE college ended, I dated one guy I met through an online game and that was great in person briefly, but ultimately didn't work out because he couldn't be a nice person, another guy I met through the same online game and that didn't work out at ALL in person, and then I started hanging out with Sark and co again. I was on the phone with him driving somewhere, and I said something to the effect of someday you're gonna find a gf and she's not gonna want you to keep going on adventures with your ex, and we won't be able to talk anymore and I had a real recordscratch moment where I realized absolutely NOT on MY watch, I wanted that boy in my life forever actually, and we've been married now for... this is year 8.

I may have landed in a soft place, but I didn't seek it out. I just lived my life and didn't worry about my sexuality or about who I was or wasn't gonna date. When I DID date, I was up front about what I wanted from any of those relationships and part of the problem with the relationships that didn't work out was sometimes that I did not KNOW what I wanted, yet. But, it was IMPORTANT I think, that I gave the chances I did, because I did learn about myself and what I wanted. That's probably the hardest fucking thing to learn, that relationships sometimes happen not because they're likely to be permanent, but because it may be fun or be a way to learn what you do or don't want. Maybe alongside of that, the lesson that it's okay to go "hm, actually this is Not For Me" and exit peacefully whenever possible. But it's okay to give temporary things a shot and see how it goes, even knowing up front it may be temporary (honestly maybe that even takes some of the stress of it off? if you don't have to worry about it being forever, and you don't have to worry about "what if I never experience other things," and you don't worry so much about messing it up so it feels easier to take chances saying and doing stuff you might otherwise consider too risky to ask for etc).

I'm aware I'm lucky that things went pretty smoothly for my entire life so far, insofar as dating or sexuality is concerned. Part of that was definitely because even the worst of the people I dated weren't really all that bad of people. A lot of it was that I just didn't date if I didn't want to. I didn't care about sex, so I didn't have sex for the first time until a few years after college, and only one guy ever pushed the issue at all (the guy in HS I immediately dropped all contact with).

The thing is... I dated or nearly dated like ten people, flirted with countless others (because it's FUN), and the only one I still have regular contact with (not just occasional friendly hellos) is the one I kept at the end.

But the friends I made in college? I kept a lot of those. I still talk to several of my college friends on a regular basis. I have made other friends since, some of whom I talk to every day, some of whom have become irregular contacts I am still fond of. But those bonds are important and the ones you make with your friends from here out do have the potential to span at least huge chunks of your life, if not the entirety of it. If you only take away one thing from this little novel...take that knowledge.

also this has nothing to do with asexuality but for pete's sake find SOME kind of hobby club to be a part of, or make one if there isn't one, follow your stupidest instincts for adventure on occasion (like playing freeze tag frisbee in a lightning storm on the PAC lawn at 11pm until the campus cops show up to make you go home), and take at least one "fuck it this sounds fun" class. Mine was archery at 7am, the only early-morning class I ever took. Worth it, we were all TERRIBLE but god it was awesome.

Good luck out there!

[jpmarvel90]

Not going to make it

Masterlist Scarlett Masterlist

Relationship: Scarlett x Reader

Summary: Y/n and Scarlett are expecting their first baby together. But when Scarlett's project is delayed, there's a risk she may not make it home for the birth.

Word Count: 4498

Y/n's POV:

Never allow your wife to go and work on a project a month before you are due to give birth. That's exactly what I did and now I'm regretting it as I'm sat in the delivery room about to push a baby out of my who ha. To be fair, she didn't really want to go, but I'm in an incredible amount of pain now, so everything is her fault! Let me back up a bit.

I've been in an incredible relationship with Scarlett for 8 years. Married for 5 of them. We met a while before that though on the set of Iron Man 2. I was one of the cinematography assistants on set. Scarlett, being the wonderful person she was, always made an effort with everyone on set. She knew everyone's name and treated them the same as she would her fellow cast mates.

Our relationship turned into one of friendship when she was going through her divorce. I was working to make sure everything was ready on a set on the backlot. Turns out Scarlett was using it to have her daily meltdown. Her words, not mine. At first, I didn't know what to do. In the end, just sat next to her and offered her a tissue. She broke the silence to explain what was happening.

From that day, we became close. She would search me out when she was having a down moment, and we'd go to an unused set, and she would let her feelings out. Sometimes she would scream, others cry. Sometimes she would be so angry she's just kicked the shit out of the props. It was cute, because she would then politely put everything back to where it was before her rampage.

I often didn't say anything. I think I was mainly there as a soundboard for her. I didn't try to offer her much advice. My own love life was a disaster so I couldn't speak with any wisdom on the matter. As things from her divorce calmed down, we started to hang out away from set. Coffee and lunch here and there. It was nice to see the change in her as she started to get over and move on from her divorce.

In fact, I was surprised when she had moved on far enough that she kissed me at a cast party for Avengers. I had just got a promotion and Kevin had talked about me taking over head of cinematography when Patrick retired at the end of this movie. I was so excited, and Scarlett was the first person that I wanted to tell. After I excitedly told her, she grabbed my shoulders and pulled me into a kiss filled with fireworks, whispering "I'm so proud of you." I was completely shocked, but after talking, we both admitted that we had feelings for each other and started to go on dates together.

We were definitely a slow burn. Although the feelings there definitely there, there was always a hesitation to take it to the next step. It wasn't until I was going to work on a movie in England that it kind of forced us to address the situation. Scarlett burst through the door to my apartment almost in a rage. "Were you going to tell me that you are moving to England for 6 months?" She fumed.

"I only found out this morning and was planning to tell you over dinner tonight." I admitted, as she towered over me whilst I was sat on my sofa. "Oh, uh. Sorry. Seems I overreacted a little here." She awkwardly laughed, rubbing at the back of her neck. I was quick to pull her down onto my lap. "I don't want you to go without knowing you're mine." She whispered with vulnerability. "Oh Scarlett. I have always been yours." I confess, making her eyes light up. "Be my girlfriend." She rushed out as she cupped my cheeks.

I leaned in and captured her lips in a sweet kiss. "I'm taking that as a yes." She grinned and I nodded. "I've wanted to ask you for so long, but I didn't know if you were there yet." I admitted shyly. "Babe, we've been dating for 4 months. Of course I was there. But I appreciate you being so thoughtful of my own feelings. But let's make sure that we have clear communication. We're going to need it over the next six months." She suggested, something I easily agreed to.

Those six months were really tough. Being so new to our relationship, I think we were both worried that it would be too much of a strain to have a long distance relationship. But we made the effort with each other, both taking the trip across the pond to spend time together, talking every day. I actually think it's why our relationship is so strong.

I knew after being with her for less than a year that I wanted to propose, but her work schedule, and mine, as I worked with Marvel, became so busy. I wanted the proposal to be perfect, so I waited. Too long really. I proposed after we had been together for two years. With the help of our friends in the cast and crew, I proposed on the set where I first saw her having her break down. That was where I started to have feelings for her. The set may have changed over the years, but my feelings for her didn't.

A year later and we tied the note and have been happily married ever since. We made a home in New York, and it was where we planned to start our family. It's not been an easy journey to get here. IVF was difficult. With the commitments Scarlett had, we agreed that I would carry first, and then Scarlett would carry our second. But it took us a little longer than we had anticipated to get pregnant the first time round. It took us 18 months. It's not bad in the grand scheme of things and people go for much longer. But for us, we were so desperate for our own little family, it was a painful time. Especially when I miscarried twice.

But after a year and a half of trying, we were finally successful. We were so cautious in the early stages. I barely went out and took some time out of work for a month. The press, and even our friends, thought that we were going through a breakup. So, it was a shock to them all when we announced our pregnancy when I reached 12 weeks.

Our friends and family were so happy for us. Scarlett's mom only lives a few minutes away and her dad is within the hour. Being based in New York wasn't what some of our friends wanted though. Both Lizzie, Scar's best friend, and Florence, mine, bought apartments near us so they could be near by once the baby came along. There were like two sisters to us. It was great.

Through my pregnancy, Scar was amazing. Very protective, not that I blame her after the stress the miscarriages put us through. But she was so loving, and my favourite moments were watching her interact with the bump. Every night she would read a book to them, and she would so often singing to them. Though this would often send me to sleep as her voice is so calming to me.

I was annoyed when it was a Marvel project that caused there to be a hint of worry that she wouldn't make it for the birth. Initially there weren't any issues. She was filming on the new Scarlett Witch movie. It was a great opportunity, with Natasha coming back in the Multi-Verse and Scar was so happy to be back in the Marvel fold.

The project was due to finish a month before my due date. We talked for a long while about whether she was going to take it. To be fair, it was mainly me trying to convince her to go. I knew how much she wanted this, and I didn't want me or our child to be the reason she didn't get to do something she loved so much. It was the promise that her mom and Flo would be around for anything I might need that ultimately helped to convince her.

We were both shocked when Hunter came back from Puerto Rico to be around for the birth. He stayed with Melanie but was a great entertainment to me. Flo was around every day, and she would often stay over. In the beginning, it was actually quite fun. I was waited on hand and foot, with Hunter and Flo being far too scared of Scarlett to do anything less.

But then I got a phone call I dreaded. When I answered the phone, I could already head that Scarlett was crying. It sent my anxiety up straight away and I was terrified that something was wrong. "I'm so sorry." Is all she kept repeating, but not actually telling me what she was sorry for. I could hear Lizzie in the background trying to calm her down.

It took her 15 minutes until she was able to calm down and tell me that filming was delayed by two weeks. She was terrified that she was going to miss the birth of the baby. I was too, but I didn't want to make her feel any worse by adding to those fears. Instead, I took the time to talk her down and explain that there would be time and at the last appointment, out little man was very comfortable and didn't look to want to be going anywhere.

I even worked out how long it would take her to get to be from Atlanta and showed her that unless I was having a super speedy labour, she would more than likely make it in time if she was able to leave as soon as she knew. Thankfully she agreed and stopped threatening to walk out on her contract. As I knew Kevin Feige quite well, I called him up and explained the situation. He said that he would allow Scarlett to leave if I went into labour and offered his own private jet to ensure that she got here as quickly as she could.

It was all sorted and everything was going to work out. That was until I started to feel lower back pain when heading to bed one night. Not thinking too much of it, as I had pretty bad back pain through the pregnancy, I ran a warm bath and soaked to help ease the pain.

It helped and I climbed into bed feeling slightly better. I feel asleep pretty easily, but I woke up with the pain returning. I looked at the clock on the side of the bed and saw that it read 3am. I got up to make myself a cup of tea and a quick snack as I was getting pretty hungry. By 8am, I was worried as the pain wasn't going away. I picked up the phone and decided that it would be best to call Flo, just in case. "Hey Y/n/n. Everything ok?" Her perky voice echoed down the phone. "Hi Flo. Could you come over. I'm not feeling great and think it would be best to have someone here just in case something happens." I ask.

Before I can even finish asking, I can hear her moving around her apartment. "I'll be there in 15 minutes. Do you think you've gone into labour?" She asks and I think about how I'm feeling. "It's only a sore back. Probably nothing." I try to shut down any thoughts of this baby coming early. I've still got another 10 days until the due date and Scarlett is due home in two days. This little bugger better stay put.

When Flo arrived, she helped get me comfortable on the sofa. I considered calling Scarlett, but I didn't want to worry her if this wasn't the real thing. But the decision was soon taken from me when I shot up from the sofa, clinging to my back and stomach as a wave of pain washed over me. I tried the best I could to breathe through it. Flo came in just as I was coming to the end of is and her face turned to have a worried look on it. "Shit! Y/n are you having contractions?" She asks, taking a seat next to me and slowly rubbing her hand up and down my back.

I nod as I control my breathing and wait for the pain to pass. "You need to time them." I grimace as I try and get comfortable again. Flo grabs her phone and starts a timer. "Ok, we need to call Scar." She says, handing me my phone. I call her a few times and she doesn't answer. "Seriously!" I huff when she doesn't pick up for the fifth time. I change tack and call Lizzie instead. She answers after two rings.

"Hi Y/n. Are you ok?" She asks with a cheery voice. "Are you with Scarlett?" I question and I know she can hear the slight panic in my voice. "She's filming at the moment, but I'm on set. Is everything ok?" She enquires. "I think I'm in labour." I reply, which earns a squeal of excitement. "Lizzie. Any chance I can speak with my wife?" I ask when she doesn't seem to be doing anything but bouncing around with excitement. "Oh right. Of course. I'm on my way."

I listen as she rushes across set. I hear the voice of Kevin and then he calls out to Scarlett. There's some mumbling before I finally hear my wife's voice. "Hi my love. Is everything ok?" She asks a little out of breath. "How quickly can you get to New York?" I ask, feeling a pain starting to pick up again. "Don't mess around Y/n." She lightly scolds, but the sudden cry of pain shows her that this is no joke. "Oh shit. Is that a contraction?" She questions through the phone, her voice getting frantic.

"No, I just like crying down the phone to you." I respond sarcastically. "Fuck. I'm not there. I have to be there." She starts to panic. "Then get going." I almost shout down the phone as Flo tries to help me through the contraction. "Right! Yes. Put Flo on the phone." She orders and I put the phone on speaker. "I'm here Scar." Flo announces, giving me a smile. "How far apart are her contractions?" She quizzes. "At the moment 15 minutes and her waters haven't broken yet." She informs my panicking wife.

There's some mumbling as she talks to someone and then returns her attention back to us. "Ok, when they're 5 minutes apart, she has to go to the hospital. I'm going to leave as soon as I can. I just need to change and then I'm heading to the airport. I should be with you within 7 hours. Call my mom and brother so they're there too." She instructs to Flo. "Just hold on for me babe. I promise that I'm going to be there, right by your side." She then tries to comfort me. "I need you Scar." I cry as I finally come through the contraction. "I know my love. I'm going to be with you as fast as I can." She says, before reluctantly telling me she needs to hang up so she can get ready.

After that phone call, Flo does as asked and calls Melanie and Hunter. They both say to call when we go to the hospital as they don't want to crowd me. Which I'm really grateful for. It's now a waiting game for my contractions to get closer together. I stand up to walk off some of the pain, slowly rubbing my hand over my bump. "I'm begging you little man. Please hold on so your mama can get here." I beg him, not wanting to do this without her.

My phone rings and I grab it to see a facetime from Scarlett. I answer it to see her smiling at me, but I also see the concern in her eyes. "Hi babe. I'm in the car on the way to the airport. How are you?" She asks me. "Sore. This fucking hurts Scar." I tell her and she chuckles, but quickly stops when I glare at her. "I miss you." I sniffle, trying to hide the tears. "I miss you too. So much. But I'm going to be with you before you know it!" She tries to comfort me.

"How far apart are your contractions now?" She questions. I look over to Florence. "8 minutes." She informs me. I see Scar's face falter at that. "Wow, that's quick." She mumbles, panic taking over her. "You'll get here on time." I tell her more confidently than I feel. "Maybe I can just close my legs." I joke which makes her laugh. But that soon stops when I feel a gush of water between my legs. I look down and see a puddle of liquid by my feet. "Y/n?" Scarlett calls to me.

I slowly meet her eyes through the phone. "My waters just broke." I inform her. Flo jumps up from her seat when she hears that and gasps when she sees the state of me. "Shit. OK um, I'm just at the airport. Kevin's plane is waiting for me, and I should be in the air within an hour." She tells me. "Ok angel. We'll be waiting for you." I tell her with a smile, trying not to show her the fear I'm feeling that she's not going to make it.

90 minutes later and my contractions are now 5 minutes apart. Scarlett messaged to say they were just taking off about 15 minutes ago so it was definitely going to be close, she still has at least 4 to 5 hours until she can realistically be with us. "Come on Y/n/n. Let's get you in the car. I've called ahead to the hospital and let Melanie and Hunter know too. They're going to meet us there." Flo tells me as she helps to guide me to the car. She runs back into the house and grabs the to go bag and we're on our way.

It's been over three hours since we've arrived at the hospital. I'm now 6cm dilated and I no longer have control over my emotions. "Where is she?!" I shout through another contraction, my hand squeezing the sides of the bed. "She should be landing any minute now sweetie." Melanie tries to comfort me, dabbing at my head with a wet cloth. "I can't do this on my own." I start to cry. Melanie and Flo both stop what they're doing, taking one of my hands each. "She'll be here. And if she isn't, you're not alone. You have us with you. We're not going anywhere." Melanie tells me firmly.

I'm not close with my parents. When I came out, it had a negative affect on my relationship with them. When I told them I was pregnant, they could barely hide their disgusted at the thought of Scarlett and I having a child together. Melanie has been the mother I didn't have and I'm so grateful that she's here. But she's not the one that I want next to me. I want my wife.

"She's landed and making her way here." Hunter rushes into my room with a smile, but it's not met with enthusiasm. "She's 9cm dilated. It's almost time." The midwife tells me, but I shake my head refusing to believe it. "Nope. Not happening. I'll just hold my breath or something. This baby is not coming until my wife is next to me." I say firmly. "Come on buddy, we had a talk." I plead to the bump once again, only to be hit by another contraction. "Oh, fuck you!" I scream as Flo imitates the breathing pattern I need to do. "Come on Scar." I whisper to myself.

"No, no, no." I chant, gaining Flo's attention. "What's wrong?" She asks, gently running her fingers through my hair. "I feel the need to push" I tell her, which gets the midwives attention. "Ok, that's the sign that your son wants to join the world now Y/n." She says but I'm shaking my head, sobbing at this point. "NO! She's not here. Please!" I beg, but I know it's no use. "Ok, we can only have one person in the room during labour." The midwife informs the three of them. "You're her back up birthing partner Flo. We'll wait outside." Melanie responds before leaning into leave a kiss on my forehead. "I'll be back to meet my grandson." She smiles, which I easily return.

Hunter is next to say goodbye, before they both disappear into the hallway. Flo takes my hand and gives me a confident look. "I thought she'd make it." I cry as Flo tries to shush me. "I know. I know I'm not the one you wanted with you. But I'm not going anywhere." She tells me, providing me the smallest of comforts.

"Ok Y/n. We're going to need you to start pushing with your next contraction." The midwife informs me. She's not here. She's not made it. Our son is going to come into this world without her. As I push with the next contraction, tears stream down my face to know she's not here. It's breaking my heart.

"I'M HERE!" Scarlett's voice fills the room as the door slams open. Relief washes over me as my contraction comes to an end, and I see the one face that I've wanted by my side. Flo places a kiss on my head and leaves so Scarlett can take over. She instantly takes my hand in hers and places a kiss on my head. "I'm so sorry. I'm late." She says panting, out of breath from clearly running. "It's ok. You're here now." I smile at her, puckering up my lips to show I want a kiss. She giggles and leans down and captures my lips in a kiss.

It doesn't last long as another contraction kicks in. "You got this baby. I'm so proud of you." Scarlett encourages as I push. "That's great. Y/n I can see the head. Take some deep breaths for me. You're almost there." The midwife says. I follow Scar who is guiding me through the breathing techniques. "I'm not sure I can go again. This hurts so much." I pant, leaning my head back against the pillow, dreading the next contraction to come. "Yes, you can. You are the strongest person I have ever met. It's something I admire about you so much and our son is so lucky to have you as their mom. I'm here with you. We are going to get through this together."

The sincerity in her voice is making me emotional, until another rush of pain hits. "Sure! Together! How's your pain level?" I hiss as I push once again, for what I hope is the final time. But all that frustration washes away when a baby's cry rings out. I look to Scar, to see her eyes filled with tears. There is no sound more magical. "Congratulations. You have a healthy baby boy." The midwife tells us, with a big smile. "Go cut the cord." I instruct Scarlett, with a push, who's reluctant to leave me. She places a kiss on my forehead and moves down towards our son.

She lets out a gasp as she meets him. "He's gorgeous." She whispers in awe. "Just like his mama." I smile. Seeing how happy Scarlett is as she takes the scissors to cut the cord. The midwife wraps a towel around the baby and pass him to Scarlett who holds him like he's made of glass. "He's got your eyes." She says as she walks him towards me and places him on my chest. Tears fall freely as his eyes meet mine. "Hi there. I'm your mom." I say with a teary smile.

Scarlett wraps her arm around my shoulders and rest her other hand on the baby. "He's perfect. Thank you." She beams, turning her gaze to me, love overflowing. "Thank you for making me a mom." She clarifies, leaning down to rest her head on my own. "We're a family of three." I smile and she chuckles. "My perfect family." She sighs contently.

After going through birthing the placenta and getting myself and the baby cleaned up. All the pain and grossness are in the past as this bright bundle of joy rests in my arms. Calmness now fills the room as Scarlett sits next to me, cooing at our newborn son. A knock at the door draws our attention as Melanie pokes her head around. "Can we come in?" She asks and we both nod quickly.

The door opens fully, and she's followed in by Hunter, Flo and also Lizzie. "They all gasp as they see the baby in my arms. "Everyone, I'd like you to meet our son. Leo Hunter Johansson." Scarlett announces to everyone's surprise. Hunter is frozen to the spot as tears fill his eyes. "Really?" He asks and Scarlett nods, standing up to pull him into a hug. "Do you want to hold your grandson?" I ask Melanie who nods, words escaping her.

I adjust my hold so she can take him. As soon as he's in her arms, she's cooing and crying herself. "My first grandchild." She babbles. Flo and Lizzie take their place by my side as Scarlett, Hunter and Melanie have a moment together. "What are you doing here Lizzie?" I ask. "I couldn't let her go on her own. She was so out of it, I'm sure she'd have gotten on the wrong plane! Besides, I wanted to be here to meet my nephew." She replies, a big grin her face.

I then turn to Flo who's already looking at me. "Thank you for being there for me. I can't thank you enough. I don't think I could have done any of this without you." I tell her honestly. "What else are sisters for." She states simply, and just like that the dam breaks and I cry into her shoulder. Stupid hormones!

After everyone has had a cuddle, they eventually have to leave as visiting hours are over. Scarlett's allowed to stay with me before Leo and I are discharged in the morning. She scoops Leo up into her arms and starts to walk around the room, bouncing him in her arms. I take a few photos and videos as she starts to sing to him. It fills my heart with so much joy and love and I can't wait for our lives together as a family.  

[illumismaid]

any kind of guy

gojo is so any kind of guy - BTR coded

wc: 1.3k hurt/comfort you guys are teenagers

synopsis: gojo lies to you bc he's dumb :(

It was a typical late afternoon after school, and I found myself hanging out with the one and only Gojo Satoru. We had become friends over the years, and I couldn't deny that there was something more between us – something that had me blushing every time he smiled that charming smile of his. 

Gojo had been acting a little differently lately. He was normally confident and charismatic, but I'd noticed that he'd become a bit more reserved and, well, lovesick. Though he'd never admitted it, it was obvious to me that he had a crush, and I was dying to know who it was. Little did I know, he had something he needed to get off his chest. 

"Hey," Gojo said as he bumped his shoulder into mine playfully, snapping me out of my thoughts. "You've been pretty quiet lately. What's going on in that head of yours?" 

I smiled and replied, "Just lost in thought, Gojo. So, is there someone special in your life these days?" 

Gojo's face flushed slightly, and he tried to play it cool. "Special? Nah, not really. I mean, not that it's any of your business." 

My heart skipped a beat, but I couldn't help but push a little further. "Come on, Gojo, you can tell me. I won't tell a soul." 

He sighed and finally admitted, "Okay, fine. There's this one person who's been on my mind, but I don't know if they feel the same way." 

I leaned in, eager to hear more, and asked, "And who might this lucky person be?" 

Gojo scratched the back of his neck, looking adorable in his moment of vulnerability. "Well, you see, it's… it's someone I've known for a long time. Someone who's always been there for me, and I can't imagine my life without them." 

My heart raced as I realized what he was saying. Could it be me? Was he talking about me? 

Gojo's voice became even softer as he continued, "I want to tell them how I feel, but I'm afraid it might ruin our friendship. What should I do?" 

I took a deep breath, trying to calm the butterflies in my stomach. "Gojo, you should go for it. Life's too short to hold back your feelings. If this person means that much to you, they deserve to know how you feel." 

He looked into my eyes, and there was a mixture of relief and hope in his gaze. "You think so?" 

I nodded and smiled warmly. "Absolutely. You never know, they might feel the same way." 

With newfound determination, Gojo stood up, his face lighting up with a renewed sense of confidence. "You're right, cutie. Thanks for the advice. I think I'm going to tell Shoko how I feel tomorrow." 

I was shocked. “The person you like is Shoko?” I say disheartened. “Well yeah, who did you think it was silly!” Gojo says casually while beginning standing up. 

As he walked away, I couldn't help but wonder if I was somebody, he could ever have feelings for. 

So, after four long days, Gojo and I hadn't exchanged a word. It felt like an eternity. The air was thick with tension, and I couldn't help but wonder what had gone wrong. We used to spend every moment together, but now we were like strangers. 

I had been so sure he was talking about me, but to hear him talk about another girl, especially one of our mutual friends, had left me devastated. I couldn't bear the thought of being around him, knowing he had feelings for someone else. 

I had retreated into my own world, trying to keep my distance, hoping that the pain in my heart would subside. I couldn't handle the thought of seeing him with Shoko, so I chose silence instead. But it had been a painful, lonely silence. 

On the fourth day, I found myself sitting alone in our usual spot by the river, skipping stones across the water, and replaying those heartbreaking words he had spoken. 

Then, out of nowhere, I heard his voice. "Hey. Can we talk?" 

I looked up to see Gojo standing there, looking unsure and regretful. My heart ached at the sight of him. I didn't want to keep ignoring him, but the pain was still too fresh. 

Reluctantly, I nodded, and he sat down beside me, his gaze fixed on the water. "I've missed you," he admitted, his voice tinged with sadness. 

I couldn't bring myself to look at him. "Gojo, you said you had a crush on Shoko. What's there to talk about?" 

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "That... that was a lie." 

My head snapped in his direction, my heart racing. "A lie? But why?"

Gojo finally turned to face me, his eyes filled with sincerity. "Because I was afraid, (y/n). I was scared that if I told you how I really felt, it would ruin our friendship. But these past four days have been torture, and I can't take it anymore. I want to be any kind of guy you want me to be. I mean, I've noticed that I can be a bit... over the top sometimes. I know I can be arrogant and a show-off, and I want you to know that I'm willing to change. If there's something you don't like about me or if there's a certain kind of person you'd rather be with, I'm willing to become that person for you.” 

Tears welled up in my eyes, and I struggled to keep my emotions in check. "Gojo, what are you trying to say?" 

He took a deep breath and finally confessed, "I don't have a crush on Shoko. It's you, (y/n). I've been in love with you for as long as I can remember. I was too scared to admit it, but I can't keep lying to myself or to you. I love you." 

My heart swelled with a mix of emotions – relief, joy, and love. The pain of the past few days seemed to melt away, replaced by a warmth that I had longed for. 

"You don't have to change for me, Gojo," I said softly. "I care about you just the way you are.” 

With tears streaming down my face, I turned to Gojo and said, "You really had me fooled, didn't you?" 

He smiled, a mixture of relief and happiness in his eyes. "I'm sorry. I should have been honest from the beginning." 

I leaned in and gently kissed him, my heart finally at ease. "It's okay, Satoru. I love you too." 

thank you for reading ♡

[thewritingofspencerrose]

Mistakes Made

Travis Kelce x OC

I've gone to stay with Jason and the girls. When you've decided you're ready to talk, you know where to find me.

Those words weren't the first thing to trigger Travis to the fact that he had fucked up.

The first was when he had left without a response on Friday, but he had assumed she would reach out and they would fix things.

The second was the night before the game. There was no facetime, no call, nothing to soothe the amount he was missing her.

The third was when he only got a single text from her during the week he was gone, on Sunday just before the game, and it was only five words. Good luck, I love you.

He had realized immediately how badly he had fucked up. But not for a moment did he want to recognize that.

"You are the biggest asshat I have ever had the displeasure of knowing."

"Jason-"

"Who do you think you are showing up at my front door?" It's Kylie this time, still wiping her hands on a towel from the kitchen but her expression is anything but the image of kind housewife that the rest of her is portraying. "After what you did to Dorthy, you have the audacity to show your face?"

"Ky," Is all he can manage to mumble, every ounce of exhaustion clear in his whole body. "I'm here to fix things, not to fight with you or Jason."

"You shouldn't have left yourself with something to apologize for Trav," Jason is the one to offer as advice, letting him into the entry. "Thea showed up to the house sobbing with an overnight bag on Friday and Ky couldn't even get the reason for your fight out of her until yesterday."

"I fucked up, I know that."

"Your girlfriend told you she was pregnant with your child and you walked out of the house without a word. You more than fucked up Travis," Kylie corrects, the end of her scolding being punctuated with soft giggles from another room.

"What are the girls doing up so late?" Travis asks, knowing the sound of his nieces giggles by heart. "I thought they had a bedtime of 8:30?"

"Dorthy and the girls are making your mom's cookie recipe," Kylie answers, moving her body out of his path to the kitchen, the three adults entering to a sight that would bring smiles to anyones face.

But the sight only made Travis want to cry.

Because there was the love of his life, wearing his sweatshirt with his middle niece on her hip, the new tightness of the sweatshirt and little girl's leg accentuating the woman's baby bump.

How far along did she say she was again?

His oldest niece is beside them on a stool, scooping the cookie batter onto the pan of they all dance around to music.

It's so domestic, and it's something that he and she will have in their futures. If he can fix this.

"Wyatt, Elliotte, come with me to get ready for bed and Auntie will put the cookies in the oven. Daddy and I will even let you come back down to have cookies with Auntie and Uncle when they're done," Kylie promises, the little girls being helped down and hugging their aunts legs, doing the same to their uncles' on the way out of the room, chasing each other up the stairs.

"Jas, come on, give the two a minute," Kylie instructs, tugging on my brother-in-law's arms, a soft smile being shot my way as they leave the room.

And now it's just Trav and I, the man who's presence I hadn't noticed until Ky took the kids.

"Hi," Is the only greeting I can manage, tucking the cookies into the oven for the girls before wrapping my arms around myself.

"How did I not notice this before?" He asks in a response, feet carrying him in long strides over to me. His eyes are trained on my stomach the entire time, until his eyes catch mine, "May I?"

"Trav, you've touched everywhere on my body, I don't know why you're asking now," I mumble, but this just seems to insult him.

"We haven't talked in a week Baby, I don't deserve to touch you, prior or not," He whispers, and I can feel the tears coming to my eyes.

"You can," I approve, his hands meeting my stomach, rounding over his sweatshirt to see the true size of the bump.

"How have I not noticed you were growing our little bean in there?" His tears slipping down his face. "I'm so sorry for walking out. I didn't know how to process the information, but that was no excuse to just walk out. I should have celebrated you, I should have celebrated our baby. And instead I walk out for a fucking football game." He scoffs.

I hate that he's crying. Argument or not. He's apologizing and I just hate that he's upset.

Taking the pads of my thumbs, I rub the tears from his eyes, taking his hands from my sides and into my own.

"Actually, she's about the size of an artichoke these days," I correct, chuckling lightly in an attempt to soften the sadness. "And it's ok. I mean, it's not, it really tore me apart thinking you didn't want our baby, but I should have told you sooner. Just with practice and games and -"

"You're not allowed to apologize when I'm the one who did wrong, Baby," He interrupts, a bright smile breaking out on his lips as he pulls me closer to his body by my hips. "So we're having a little girl?"

"I'm convinced your family can't result in boys," Kylie's voice chimes from the doorway, her and Jason standing wrapped in each other's arms. "I mean, this is four for four on kids that is going to be a girl."

"Speaking of," Travis starts, looking between all of us, "Do the girls know?"

"We're having a baby cousin!!" Wy cheers, bursting into the room with Elliott hot on her tail.

"Does this whole family just eaves drop and bust in?" I can't help but question, because this is just wild.

"We do, you should be used to this Kid," Jason confirms, Wyatt and Elliott joining Trav and I in a little hug.

"You girls know about your little cousin?" Trav asks, smiling as he crouches next to the two.

Ellie just nods, but it's her sister who answers.

"Yeah, Daddy said it will make Grammy love you more."

"That's it, I'm calling Mom!"

[chalkrevelations]

Ugh, my BOYS. How do I love them? Let me count the ways:

So, let's start with Boston returning to the scene of the crime their first encounter - not only to the shop itself, but leading Nick back to the very same spot where they first had sex - first connected in the only way Boston knew how, at that point - the way Nick led him back there that first time. Boston's wounded and hurting, and he's tried to explain himself and no one will listen to him, but there's one person who he knows cares about him no matter what he's done, one person who's actually told him so, one single person in Boston's life who's ever opened their arms to the monster in the closet and been a source of unconditional love - and it's someone who he knows will listen and will let him apologize for what he's done, and who then, if precedent is to be believed, will not continue to beat him up about it, and so that's where he goes to ground.

The leveling of power here is fantastic - Boston is introduced to us in the first ep as The Hunter, but he's never been that in his relationship with Nick. Nick has been the hunter, the pursuer, since the minute he tilted that eyebrow at Boston, since the decision to snap his suggestive selfie onto Boston's phone, since he grabbed Boston's wrist like a snare and led him to the back of that shop. He's laid traps for Boston, he's hunted (and stalked) Boston, he almost had Boston, he tells Sand, before he accuses Sand of ruining it. And then - then he lets Boston go.

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours.

So here Boston comes, back. Not only back, but onto Nick's home ground, into Nick's family's shop, where Nick has the advantage and comfort of familiarity. Boston is showing himself to be Nick's. But at the same time, he's back in his role as the hunter. He's the one now doing the pursuing. During every bit of their conversation in the shop, Boston is busy gauging Nick's reactions to see if he can and should take another step forward, back toward Nick, if Nick is open to it, if Nick's goodbye was about Boston or about Nick - and whether it was therefore permanent or open to change if the situation changes, if Boston changes, if Boston indicates he wants there to be something between them again.

Boston walks in the door and he sizes up Dan, and he knows that's the guy who was kissing Nick at the bar, and he files away that information. And he comes up to the counter - and we can see Nick is the prey this time, instead of the hunter, because of his very different demeanor from the first time he and Boston stood at this counter, literally taking a step back, acting uneasy and puzzled about what's going on - and Boston asks if that was Nick's boyfriend. And Nick has every opportunity to say yes - Dan literally just told him that he wants to hit on Nick! - to lay down a firm boundary right here, up front. But he says 'No." And so Boston is free to feel out his next step.

So Boston takes the opportunity to get Nick to that back corner where they have history. And then he asks for Nick's advice. "What's your opinion" aka "What do you think would suit me?" aka "What do you think of me?" And when Nick continues to play along, we get this whole coded metaphorical speech that continues to be this exploratory dance of Boston feeling his way forward and Nick constantly saying yes and allowing Boston to take the next step:

I broke a thing, can you help me fix it?

Yes.

The fix will need to be tough, because I don't usually take good care of things I own. (I hurt you, and I know it, and I admit it.) (I'm not good at this, can you help me be better at this?) (Can you continue to bear me when I fuck up, will you continue to accept me and love me even when it hurts?) (I came back to you, I'm yours. Are you still mine?)

And Nick's response is so telling - be more careful next time. Not "be more careful with the next one," but "be more careful NEXT TIME." (Yes, and maybe there can be a next time.) Some things can't be replaced.

I'll take good care of it from now on. (Things will be different.) (I want to change. I want us to change.) (I want to be better, I want us to be better.) (And oh, by the way, I'll SHOW YOU A PICTURE of something irreplaceable.)

And then Boston hands Nick the phone. (Here I am, naked in front of you, in a way I've never been with any of the tons of people I've had sex with.) (I miss you.) (I don't want to be without you.) (Will you come back to me?) He can't even look at Nick to begin with, before his curiosity gets the better of him.

And then Nick tells him to have a seat while Nick does this work. (Can you wait for me if I need time?)

And Boston's reply is that he has all the time in the world to wait for Nick.

Y'all. I can't. I cannot with these two. This is everything I ever wanted. I know I said I would give you ACTUAL MONEY, Jojo. How much do I owe you?

[andy-15-07]

Since I met you { Chapter 1}

masterlist ! pairing: Sam Claflin x oc!reader

SUMMARY : When a student meets a famous actor, what can happen? They fall in love, they don't care what the world says about them, they swear their love and that they will be next to each other regardless of the situation.

The story follows the beginning and formation of the love story of Sam and Andrea.

GENRE: fluff, love at first sight

When you ask yourself if you are making the right choice in life, you always ask yourself the question "Am I making the right choice?" , but for me it was not a good choice but an excellent one, I study what I like, photography.

Here I am studying at the University of Arts London, for a good career in this field, I am glad that I have taken this important step in my life.

My name is Andrea Lawson, I'm 20 years old and I'm in my first year at university, as expected, I live in the dormitory, I have a roommate Louisa.

Me and Lou are the complete opposite, she is always invited to campus parties, anyone who knows her, she is popular and I am the one who stays in the dorm room and studies, my personality is that I don't go to parties and I am not known by the people on campus.

But today is not one of those lucky days, Louisa and her boyfriend are in our room and I decided to leave them alone, after all they need privacy. As for love, it doesn't exist for me, I don't have a boyfriend, no one would look at me.

"Andrea, why do you have to leave? We can have a movie night with the three of us, you know we don't mind." Louisa tells me who was in the arms of her lover, Alex.

"I don't want to disturb you, you also need time together, maybe you have other plans and I don't want to be in your way." I tell them calm down while putting on my boots.

"Well let's say you're right. But where are you going?" Alex asked me.

"I'm going to that cafe I told you about."

"And you're going with someone?" Louisa asks me curiously

"Who should I go with? I'm going alone, I still have a few things to finish on a project." I tell

"You always do this, when you go out somewhere, you do all the work related to college, go out a little more, go to a party, have a drink and maybe get together with someone. You're living life!" She tells me and gets up from Alex's arms.

"Lou, you know that this is your lifestyle, not mine. Even if I meet someone, I meet them in my own way and you know this very well. Stop forcing me with such things. Please!" I tell her and look at her.

"I know, sorry! But I want to see you happy, not only with your head in books. You know I only want the best for you, right?"

"I know Lou and I thank you for this. Thank you!" I tell him and give him a hug.

"I'm glad we met, we make a good team" he says and hugs me.

Lou and I didn't know each other but since I started university, we are like two sisters, different but at the end of the day we tell each other everything and give each other advice.

"Now I know that I will speak on behalf of myself and Louisa, but be careful what you do," Alex tells me.

"I will, don't worry, I know what I'm doing. Have fun!" I tell them and leave the room.

I leave the room and meet the typical London weather, it's raining but it doesn't bother me, the rain calms me down.

The road to the cafe is not too long but it is 3 streets from the hostel, usually by the time I get to the cafe I listen to music with headphones, but today I didn't take them with me, but this doesn't bother me because instead of listening to music, I listen how it rained

Around me, the people in the dorms go to the club or others go to have a drink, it's normal that it's Friday. But what do I do? I'm going to finish a project.

As I was thinking, I didn't realize that I had arrived in front of the place where I can call it my favorite place in the vicinity.

Not many people come to this place, only a few, the owner was an old lady who always tells me that this was her dream.

I order a coffee and sit in my favorite place, by the window, to watch the rain. I look around the room and notice that there are few people today, something usual.

I take out my laptop and the files I need and spread them on the small table.

I think it's been an hour since I've been here and I decided to take a break, when I look up from my laptop I realize that someone is looking at me.

A boy, I think he has the same age as me or is 2 years older than me, I look at him and smile, lowering my eyes to the file. Suddenly I hear someone clearing his throat, when I look up I see the boy looking at me.

"Hi! Can I stay?" He was asking me, easy to guess that he is from here, he had an English accent.

"Yes, you can sit down, I don't mind" I say and smile.

To my surprise, I smile for the first time when I'm not forced, this boy has that something that makes me smile, he's cute, even very handsome.

"What are you studying?" He asked me and looked at a file that was fixed in front of him.

"I study photography, and what you see there are pictures taken by me for some exams, some are taken just out of passion." I explain to him but my smile doesn't disappear.

"The pictures are very beautiful, even excellent. You are very talented."

"Thank you very much!" I thank him.

"I'm Sam, Sam Claflin." He says and extends his hand towards me.

"Hi Sam, I'm Andrea, Andrea Lawson, nice to meet you!"

"The pleasure is only mine Andrea," he tells me and I blush, I have never blushed from a small talk.

"Are you studying somewhere? I haven't seen you in this place before." I ask him and look at him carefully.

"I'm not studying, actually I studied but I finished last year. But I like coming to this place, it's quiet and has that something that tells you to come again, and the owner is wonderful, she reminds me of my relatives. Not you I saw you here, I remembered a beautiful girl." he tells me and I start to blush even more.

"I haven't seen you either until today, maybe today is our lucky day. I don't want to seem too curious, you can not answer me if it bothers you. What did you study?" I ask him and look at him as if he were the last person on earth.

"Don't mind, I studied at the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Art." he says and approaches me, with a smile that could not be erased from his lips.

We look into each other's eyes and I feel like my heart would jump out of my chest, I look at his green eyes, like a forest in spring. I feel his hand when he takes mine and at that moment let's get even closer to me. This has never happened to me, but it was a pleasant feeling.

"What do you say if you want to go for a walk together in the park, don't worry if it's raining, I have an umbrella. Do you want to go Andrea?" he tells me very slowly, telling me almost in a whisper  and squeezes my hand a little in his.

"Yes, I would be delighted to go for a walk Sam." I tell him the same way he asks me, like a whisper.

I see that his smile seems to increase upon hearing my words, as if he knew that the answer would be 'Yes'. I remember the discussion I had with Louisa and her boyfriend, I think I was right not to listen to her and to do things my way and this I did.

"Let me help you pack your things." Sam tells me and I nod my head.

He helps me pack my things, then he gives me his hand to stand up, I see him go behind the chair where I left my coat and take it and motion for me to put my hair aside and help me with the coat , he also gets dressed and looks for something, but I can't figure out what.

I see him take his scarf from next to my bag and put it around my neck, a gesture that left me speechless.

"It's cold outside, so I don't want to hear you say something against the scarf, okay?" he tells me with a smile.

"Ok Sam, I trust you." I tell .

We say goodbye to the landlady and head for the exit, Sam smiles and opens the door for me, going out I realize that he was right, it's cold outside, he opens the umbrella and extends his hand towards me.

Out of instinct I put my hand around his hand and I approached him, I feel him looking at me. I look up and look straight into his eyes and smile.

"Sam?"

"Yes Andrea? Is there something wrong?" he tells me, his tone of voice is worried.

"No! Everything is perfect, it's more than perfect. I wanted to ask you something." I tell him and in my mind I think if it is a good idea or not.

"You can ask me what you want my dear." he tells me, and when I heard how he told me those words, I was even happier.

"What do you do? You mean as a job?"

"My dear Andrea, I'm an actor. But keep calm, it's not too well known yet, not many people know me yet, I've been part of a few films and series, I'm not that famous yet. That's why we walk around without we are disturbed." Sam tells me and I am a little shocked.

"I didn't think you were an actor, yes you are very handsome and attractive, I'm not saying you're not. But I didn't expect it."

"You think I'm beautiful and attractive, Andrea, you're already making me fall in love with you," he tells me and we stop.

He turns to me and looks into my eyes then he looks at my lips and at that moment he leans down and captures my lips in a passionate kiss, I didn't expect this but I kiss him back. It's like a scene from a movie or even from the books I've read.

Sam breaks the kiss and looks at me and puts his arm around me and hugs me, I put my head on his chest and we stay like that for a few minutes. The first to break the silence is Sam.

"Andrea do you believe in love at first sight?"

"Since I saw you, I knew there was something special with you, I had to find out, but after this moment that we shared, I know what it is." I tell him and look at him.

"What is special about me?" he asks me and I look at him attentively.

"You're not like the other boys, but you're not a boy, you're a man, a gentleman, a romantic. I know we've only known each other for a few hours but I really like being with you, I told you that you have that something how do you make a person sit next to you regardless of whether you are an actor or not." I tell

"And you have that something that makes a person talk and sit next to you. Ever since you entered that cafe, I have seen a person passionate about an art that many people do not understand, when I came to your table I realized I was right, you're that type of person who focuses on something. I like that in a girl." Sam told me and I realized that he was telling the truth as he looked into my eyes and caressed my cheek with his thumb.

"You know something Sam? I'm lucky to have met you."

"I like you Andrea! Maybe we have the opportunity to get to know each other better, what do you say?"

"I like you too, Sam, and I agree that we should get to know each other better." I tell him and kiss him on the cheek, but Sam makes a face that knows what he's asking for.

I look once more and put my arms around his neck and press my lips to his in a passionate kiss in which Sam does not hesitate to respond to this kiss. It's as if our lips are two puzzle pieces that have finally found their match.

We break the kiss and look at each other. Maybe in the end I found someone with the same passions as mine.

"Where are you staying? It's already getting dark, it's cold and I don't want you to go home alone and catch a cold. I want to go with you to make sure you get there safely and to hold you in my arms."

"A real gentleman and I want to stay in your arms and I live in the dorm, it's 5 streets from here."

"Staying in the dorm? That's cool, I hope you have a roommate or more," says Sam and takes my hand.

"I only have one colleague and the reason why I left the dorm is that she came with her boyfriend to our place and I thought I'd leave them alone," I explain to Sam and put my head on his arm.

"I understand! You always have to leave when her boyfriend comes or do you leave of your own free will?" she asks me

"I'm leaving, they also need privacy and if I didn't leave today I wouldn't know you anymore, right?"  I ask him looking at him.

"Yes, you are very right, my dear, and unfortunately I have arrived."  he says a little upset because our walk is over.

"Oh, I don't like it." I tell him and pull him to a side where he was covered to leave the umbrella down for a few minutes.

"We'll see each other, I promise, give me your phone so I can pass on my number, then I'll give you my phone so you can do the same, ok?"  He tells me and takes his phone from the pocket of his brown coat that he is wearing.

First I give her my phone and she gives her number and she gives it back to me, when I look at the new contact, the first thing I see is the name 'Sam���', I am surprised but I love this.  I look up from the phone and see him smiling at me and holding his phone for me to take.  I take it and give him my number, I gave him the name just as he gave me 'Andrea♡' on the phone and I give him the phone back.

"I'll give you a message, I promise," he says and puts his arms around my waist.

"Ok and I promise I'll send you a message" I promise and put my arms around his neck.

We look at each other and I see Sam lean down and kiss me passionately.  We break the kiss and I head towards the entrance but I suddenly stop.

"Sam, wait, I have to give you the scarf back!" I tell him and take it down.

"No Andrea, I want you to keep it, it suits you better, it suits your style. See you tomorrow, yes?"  He asks me and I nod and watch him leave.

I like him, he is the kind of man I like.  I enter the dormitory and head towards my room and my thoughts remain with Sam.  The person who stole my heart

[digital-chance]

writeblr intro

hey i'm chance! i've done a writeblr intro recently but i didn't like it, so this is take 2. here's the old one.

─── about me -⋆⋅☆

name : chance

pronouns : they/he

likes : cyberpunk, romance, anime, kpop, music, history, design

age : 20

i tend to swear both on here and in my writing, so if you're sensitive to that, i don't think my blog or work is for you. i also use the word 'queer' a lot since i self-identify as such, when i do choose to self-identify.

i'm interested in so much, which would be impossible to fully state. there are so many new things out there and i love learning about them all!! this blog is mainly for writing but i'm not strict on that.

i also am pretty sure i'm neurodivergent (no diagnosis or anything yet) and tend to delve into hyper-fixations for weeks at a time. if i haven't posted for a while, it's probably because of one of my other hyper-fixations or school.

i'm going to college for my bachelor's in graphic design, which might make my responses during the school year delayed.

i'm always open to ask or tag games!! it might take me a few to respond but i'll respond.

─── writing -⋆⋅☆

you'll find a lot of diverse characters, the found/chosen family trope, romance or rom-com, angst, and references to actual history or historical events within my work. sometimes i throw in a little art fact since i'm an art student. in nearly every one of my works you can find a prominent lgbtq+ character, too.

i write for original works and fanfiction alike. i often alternate what project i'm writing on and tend to leave wips unfinished. there's no one specific fandom that i'm in since i tend to dabble in everything.

i enjoy reading all sorts of stories, but some of the tropes and genres that have a special place in my heart include:

[ genres : romance . action . sci-fi . dystopian . heists . cyberpunk . horror . comedy . mystery ] [ tropes : friends to lovers , enemies to lovers , fake/pretend relationship , college au , coffee shop au , domestic , fluff , angst ]

─── ⋆ looking for ⋆⋅☆

more writers to follow!

good vibes & friends

writing advice & critique buddies (will help critique ur work too)

─── works in progress -⋆⋅☆

nova futurum | original work | #wip: nova futurum

─── ⋆ status : brainstorming

a lgbtq+ mafia cyberpunk story with the working title "Nova Futurum." i've got the general information down and i'm currently working on fleshing out my main characters. for now it's in the very basic stages, but feel free to ask me about it or give any tips!

you still would've been mine | fanfiction | #wip: yswbm

─── ⋆ status : outlining, research, & writing draft 1

Steven "Steve" Rogers wakes up in the 21st century after crashing into the ice in 1942, leaving behind his life as the mascot of the USA along with his childhood in Brooklyn NYC. The Winter Soldier, a man left behind in the war recovers his memories as the man known as James "Bucky" Buchanan Barnes after meeting Steve in the modern time. Steve and Bucky recall their childhood and their experience in the war as they recover.

matchbreakers | original work | #wip: match

─── ⋆ status : brainstorming

xavier works at match breakers. instead of setting people up on blind dates, he goes to dates and breaks up the couple. all sorts of people hire him, disapproving parents, jealous ex's, and those scared to see their ex's angry side. what he doesn't expect is falling in love with one of his own clients.

scars of duty | original work | #wip: sod

─── ⋆ status : plotting

Lucian is a hero who protects the city of Haines and the other members of his hero's league. They're a small-name hero just trying to make do with what they've got. A villain new to the city shows up and shakes Lucian’s perception of their own superpowers and the world.

< tag lists: if you'd like to be added for any project, let me know. i'm not the greatest at remembering the tag list but i will try! >

─── ⋆ more of my socials & my design portfolio

[celinin-archive]

Celestino Vietti and Massimo Roccoli interview each other at the CIV race held in Mugello (17.10.2014)

translation under the cut

Cele: we're here with Massimo Roccoli and I wanted to know at which age did he start, and what was the path he followed to arrive where he did

Massimo: first of all, hi, i started when i was four, because Santa Claus brought me a minibike. and- I still remember that the first time i rode it i did living room, corridor, living room and- nothing, from then on it has been a very big passion of mine that i carried with me my whole life. Now I'm thirty, so i've been riding for twenty-six years. After- well, I did the whole minibikes racing, at fourteen i started riding in the Torneo Aprilia and then... little by little, a little bit of luck, some good results and I was able to do some seasons in the World Championship, around nine, and then this year... I'm riding in the Italian Championship and in the World Championship with the Mv Team.

Cele: and well, I wanted to ask you something, whether riders picked up quite a lot

Massimo: ehhh... how old are you?

Cele: thirteen

Massimo: well, then think about bikes for a couple of years more. I started- well, honestly I always had the bikes in my mind, and then little by little you change, but... I can tell you, first of all, to not get a girlfriend, to open the throttle and then after... women will come too, but always try to manage them well. They surely have to come after dinner and leave before the first run, that way you are sure that they won't distract you during the day. but now, full throttle with both hands!

Cele: and... how was today on the wet and some advice on riding a wet race

Massimo: on the wet- today on the wet it was good, this morning i did the third best time, and then this afternoon, you saw it too, the conditions were a bit- a bit tricky, i ended up ninth because i made some mistakes. On the wet... one thing is important, that in the moment you start pushing, and i'm still talking about wet conditions, head down and full throttle, don't raise the rhythm, so never slow down, because if you get the tyres cold it gets difficult. You must never relax, and always always remain concentrated. At most, you make the same time every lap, but never go slower, that's an important thing because even if you lap two seconds slower, the tyres on the wet get cold faster and those one... they don't forgive you. If tomorrow it rains, always keep in mind the places where today it didn't dry up easily, no? Do you remember, the first variante, when you did the savelli and the arrabbiata... because tomorrow it will be in those places where there will be a bit more of water that might bother you. So always remember to ride through there with the bike straight... and to open up the throttle

Cele: ok, than you so much

Massimo: thank you!

Massimo: and what about you? What do you tell me? When did- okay, first of all, today, how was- how- we know that at the last moment, when you could have set a time, you found a red flag, and this can happen. You have all the time in the world to make up for it. How- how was it today, besides this red flag that messed it up for you?

Cele: well... at th end, the free practices were fine, in quali i was a bit unlucky but tomorrow there will be other qualis and we will do better. It was... quite tricky because then it started to rain more but... I mean, i did what i could, so.

Massimo: you did well, you were good. But listen, who's your favourite rider?

Cele: ah, I am a fan of Rossi

Massimo: good. And... what do you hope for, in your future, when you're older?

Cele: I hope, if it will be possible, to reach the World Championship. if it's not possible... I hope I will, but it's not easy

Massimo: well! I can only give you some advice... first of all, women, out. Have fun. Play, and have fun. Because I am thirty and this year i didn't want to race, because after so many years of World Championship it was hard, maybe to not get the results you hoped for, because at the end you always live with a bit of dreams, and... I wanted to stop, then I found a team that- I started having fun again, winning again, and I'm competing for the Italian Championship, so... always believe in it, and above all, have fun, that is fundamental

Cele: okay, thank you