#who ive been this invested in its ruining my life

[seokmatthewz]

SEOK MATTHEW ✧ LOVE KILLA ✧ 230323

[arolesbianism]

Thinking abt the random card au again. Why must it go so crazy hard I miss it sm

[vampryn]

i learned some insane shit about my ex best friend that made me absolutely sick. im so glad i disconnected from her when i did. this girl was legitimately personally invested in being the arbiter of my downfall. the lengths the went to try to ruin my reputation is insane, especially because it just ruined hers in the long run, and cost her a career. after i disengaged i went to therapy to heal the trauma these people had put me through, and she was sitting around circle jerking with my old friends about how awful i was. i was almost murdered, i had drugs pushed on me, i was the butt of every joke, slut-shamed for things i didnt even do, and all i wanted was friends. it's just so fucked up the lengths some people will go to try to ruin your life just because they're jealous and insecure. it literally came down to seething jealousy, but i never saw it that way because my self-esteem was so shattered. i didn't think it was possible for somebody to be jealous of me.. this girl tried to sabotage every single relationship i had while we were friends. every. single. one. and we became friends at 12 years old. she has slept with the majority of my exes. at some point i thought it was a coincidence, but the more ive heard the more disgusted i am that somebody i trusted and cared for would go out of their way to do so much damage in my life. i barely talked about her after i cut ties. we still have mutual friends (the ones who stuck around have no idea what she did to me because i didn't bother telling them-- it's futile to talk about people, i didnt want to give her my attention.) im just so happy i left that "friend" group when i did, because if one of them didn't kill me i would have done it myself. she tried to contact me a few years ago, but i ignored her message. at a point, ive forgiven her for so many horrific things she'd put me through and said to me. some of these things were so unforgivable, i seriously just can't risk being the target of all of this again. i was the child in my family that people liked to put down, and i also had to put up with it at school. for how much shit i was put through i was honestly such a positive kid. i did do and say some things i really regret when i was a teenager, for the amount of pain i was carrying around with me, i did really well for myself.

after revisiting that part of my life with new eyes, im so grateful for my friends i have right now. all id ever wanted in my whole life was friends who just wanted to spend time with me, and i finally have it at nearly 28 years old. i moved to the city ive dreamt of since i was a kid, and i met a bunch of people who genuinely care about my well-being, and will actually do things like bring soup when im sick, remember me on my birthday, defend me when im not around, and they honestly are just decent, lovely people who want to see me do well. and i want that for them too! it's an empty part of my life that ive felt missing for so long, its hard to properly explain to these people how much they've changed me and my outlook (in SUCH a positive way). my situation isn't ideal right now-- but it is temporary, and despite the things ive seen and been through, and that im just out of a fresh break-up, im in a really happy part of my life. and i appreciate that beyond words.

[leoxxii]

so yesterday on my walk i was thinking bc you know like. mental health walks or whatever. technically mine are more physical health walks bc i dont get much activity time but whatever not the point.

so i was thinking about like. ok im not lonely but its like. i have a lonely existence. i dont feel lonely or alone but like, objectively i am, if that makes sense??

i dont really have friends. like i have mutuals on here but we dont really talk and tbh its like, definitely my fault for that. and i was thinking about how ive basically NEVER had friends. like i had "friends" when i was in preschool in kindergarten, but they were more just classmates than anything else. we didnt hang out after school or do playdates or anything like that. i was never anyone's first or even second choice for anything. i only got invited to stuff the entire class did.

and my family like moved a lot. at some point we moved back and i went to that same school again and even though my class like, recognized and remembered me, they all like... moved on. nobody wanted to be my friend anymore. and once again i think it was on me.

and i dont think im an asshole or anything like that, i think im just. boring. im quiet and boring. i dont do anything, my ideal day would revolve around me being completely alone. i dont dislike people, but im so far away from being a people person that its like. ruining my relationships?

and i was on my walk and i realized that like. i know lots of people. no scratch that probably everyone has felt out of place at least once in their life. but i genuinely feel like i have never fit in. and i think its bc so much of life and society and everything puts emphasis on social activity. and i just like,,, cant do it.

i dont like talking. like, i CAN. if i really really try i can force conversation, i can force myself to go along with things, but i basically never initiate conversation bc i just. i dont like it. i like silence and gift giving and actions to show love. ive never been one to say anything to signify my thoughts or feelings. its like... my family are the only ones im comfortable enough around to talk to, and even then its mostly just my sister and dad. and its definitely a rare thing. only when im really invested in whatever someone else is talking it.

but like. so much of friendship and just humans in general require TALKING. i cant be friends with someone i dont ever reach out first. i cant be friends with someone i dont talk to. thats just sort of how it seems to work. and ive never been that guy. ive always been told i was a quiet kid, that i was a horrible conversationalist, that i was too shy. and like i am i guess anxious around people a bit. but i dont know if i ever was shy. i think i just didnt like talking. thats just like. who i am as a person.

i do like my internal dialogue. like, im not just sitting in complete silence all the time. i just am content with my own company. i think. maybe thats why reading and writing are so important to me? i can write and write and write about the thoughts in my head but i hate trying to voice them to another person. talking into the void like this feels so much easier. maybe im just bad with people and i need practice. i dont know. but i think im just,,, not cut right for what the world wants a person to be. i dont feel like a social animal. i mean, id probably get lonely if i WAS fully alone. this isnt like some weird alpha man who needs nobody and cant rely on anything kind of thing. i know im probably just taking what i have now for granted. but. hm.

so its like. its weird. i cant do small talk, i cant fake laugh, i never have anything to talk about. i dont DO anything, because ive always been content being by myself. i need a couple hours of silence and alone time every day or i get stressed and miserable. and i know i need to just get over it and TALK to people and reach out first sometimes and actually be a person. but it feels so. impossible. its like im just bad it. i do a bad job at existing around people. is this just normal introvert behavior and im just stuck around extroverts my entire life? does everyone feel like this? is everyone just faking it forever? at my old job, people started to not like me and look annoyed whenever i showed up, because i didnt talk to them and was too quiet. i answered with yes and okay to most things and that was it. i just worked in silence the rest of the time. everyone else didnt like that. they wanted to talk to me. i made no friends. i barely made acquaintances. i feel like im just doing this whole thing wrong, but its like. i feel bad about not talking bc other people want me to. i dont WANT to talk more. im fine with this little bubble im in. it just sucks that i feel like im making other people feel upset or disliked or unwanted when thats not true!! i like being around people, most of the time, and i dont mind being talked AT. i just. i dont want to HAVE to add more things in just for the sake of talking.

i dont know. i forgot most of what i was thinking. this is mostly just like a dump of words and thoughts. ive been weird the past couple days. but whatever. i wont even delete this!! its just void talk anyways. its not even talk. im just typing to nobody. maybe its the expectations. god i dont even know anymore. tumblr's starting to lag from all this text i think. does any of this even makes sense?? i dont know if im like. articulating it well. as i said im not good with this kind of stuff.

ok well thats out of my system for now i think. bye void

[just-some-random-blogger]

part 2 you were waiting for lifetime for! (hope no) ig ive told abt all the big things so now im gonna go for the text. oh! and!! a moodboard TT youre so sweet TT i appreciate the amount of efforts you make for this🥺 it expresses the events really good! oh no another thing!! the previous life references from the reader! love them. the portrait and all lines she say to aemond (a lil stupid though bc? he knows nothing and not connected with this but ok) and king? love targ brothers interactions sm! vissys presence makes so much sense (beside developing the plot). it feels so much more complete w/him. have only realised it. AEMOND WAITING FOR AEGON AT NIGHT TT WHY so cute??? TT like they bicker and almost fight over a woman but hes still waiting for his bro TT it made me cry rn. also this little feeling of woe between them while theyre talking abt the woman theyre both pining after and whos never to be with either of them... WHINING DRUNK DAEMON TT im a simp. can imagine his glossy eyes and smudged kisses on whatever skin he can find bc of the yearning for close proximity. love it, so soft so tender so A. but his greezy ass😡 thanks again for not making it nsfw. i love how she rejects his flirting GHHDHD she needs to preserve her maidenhood till the wedding night, after all. (sorry IK its bad, sorry:( ) and daemon doing sports! i love this detail that shows that hes really from a royal family and has duties and had an education and these royal hobbies (ig?). DAEMON CALLING READER PRINCESS. you probably didnt mean it but i do see it as the reference to her actually being his wife who has his royal title. “Then why won’t you let me put a dragonling in you?” 1) i snorted. 2) it made me think. its ok with your point of view. but since ive seen the beginning as reader dying during the labour, i though she might be frightened of actually getting pregnant? yes its been 2000 years but. she not likely got pregnant throughout this time. 'not liking his indirect insinuation of weakness' GASLIGHT GATEKEEP GIRLBOSS YES!! love her. the domestic atmosphere of their interactions is making me smile so softly. AND daemon caring about wifes well-being in the first place after shes gone? equals him being smug before. OH AND IM THE GOVERNMENT JFHCXJSDJ weve talked abt it so it was cute to find it in the fic. youre such a sweety<з STILL pretty awkward interactions with aemond make my heart clench. hes so timid and so emo for this. understandable that 1) he respects his professor 2) hes in love w/her 3) thus he wants her to be happy and hes the type to let her go find her happiness in another place 4) hes suspicious. but so emo TT and your intro to the 'investigation' (hope im not saying some ridiculous shit to you)! this book intrigues. and now im really inerested if shes gonna tell aemond anything. bc she like had intention to do so?... im intrigued. so THE king coming to the museum. its interesting how hes so calm and thoughtful(?) and its relieving how hes so protective of his brother. even if hes against the wedding and dont know this woman, he knows his brother is in love and goes crazy bc of her so hes being the real kepa and going and trying to solve it all. i also see them having a nice conversation with logic, calmness, respect and all and daemon rushing in and ruining it by screaming smth like 'fckng viserys i love her'. also. i always read the last line before reading smth. and i was so amused by seeing aegons plain and loosey text to aemond. theyre so bros here i love them TT overall, this part was more about daemon, domestic interactions, spoilers(?) of forthcoming events and symbols so no tears. (NOT a dare) im very proud of you for writing so much. i appreciate your efforts soso much! and oh how big brained r u in this part! ig all your plans were given the greatest expression and a start! youve done SOSO good! thank u so much for the time, thoughts and hard work you invest in this! hope youre proud of yourself as well. bc you deserve it. you and your fics deserve much more love than tumblr can ever provide. take care! love you<з

YAY P2

part 2 you were waiting for lifetime for! (hope no) ig ive told abt all the big things so now im gonna go for the text. oh! and!! a moodboard TT youre so sweet TT i appreciate the amount of efforts you make for this🥺 it expresses the events really good!

i didnt think you would make a p2 anymore so this is GAHHH <3 <3 im glad you like the moodboard!!! i love it too!!!! <3 i love making moodboards T_T <3 it really helps set the mood for me <3 hehe HAHAH

oh no another thing!! the previous life references from the reader! love them. the portrait and all lines she say to aemond (a lil stupid though bc? he knows nothing and not connected with this but ok)

T_T HAHAHAHAHHHAAHAHAHAH so mean to aemond HAAHHAHah but im glad you enjoy the references to yns old life

and king? love targ brothers interactions sm! vissys presence makes so much sense (beside developing the plot). it feels so much more complete w/him. have only realised it.

im so glad !!!! T_T

AEMOND WAITING FOR AEGON AT NIGHT TT WHY so cute??? TT like they bicker and almost fight over a woman but hes still waiting for his bro TT it made me cry rn.

YES THEY THIS IS BROTHERHOOD/THE SIB DYNAMIC IN AN NUTSHELL also in my head they met because specifically to talk about the issue aemond had and to air out his feelings over the fact he just witnessed THE FUCKING PRINCE AND YN MAKING OUT IN HIS PLACE OF WORK RIP THAT 💀

also this little feeling of woe between them while theyre talking abt the woman theyre both pining after and whos never to be with either of them...

T_T It be like that

WHINING DRUNK DAEMON TT im a simp. can imagine his glossy eyes and smudged kisses on whatever skin he can find bc of the yearning for close proximity.

HELP ME THAT WAS SO BEAUTIFULLY AND BREIFLY PUT THAT IS SO DAEMON THAT IS DAEMON DAEMON IS THAT WOW OMG IM DEAD NOW IM DEAD SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP

love it, so soft so tender so A. but his greezy ass😡 thanks again for not making it nsfw. i love how she rejects his flirting GHHDHD

yeah i dont think im going to make it nsfw until i feel like it makes sense. yes he wants love but you gotta give him smth real. and i want it to be super tender and sweet and full of love. LOL SIMP i was thinking maybe doing in he next part but also writing smut is so draining but anyway i do what i want. if you dont feel comfy reading smut if i do write it just skip it ok

she needs to preserve her maidenhood till the wedding night, after all. (sorry IK its bad, sorry:( )

hELP EW HSAFHLASHFLAHFALSHF THE WAY I ACTUALLY WENT EW HAHAHHH by all means go off girlie AHHAHAHAHAHA

and daemon doing sports! i love this detail that shows that hes really from a royal family and has duties and had an education and these royal hobbies (ig?).

YES I LOVE THIS DETAIL TOO ACTUALLY IM GLAD YOU EVEN NOTICED IT I ACTUALLY THINK I WILL ADD A SCENE WITH HIM DOING SPORTS 🤤🥵 JUST BE BEING A THIRST ASS RAT FOR DAEMON ALSFHALSFHALSFHASL;FHLAS

DAEMON CALLING READER PRINCESS. you probably didnt mean it but i do see it as the reference to her actually being his wife who has his royal title.

NO I 100% MEANT IT LIKE THAT YOU GOT IT RIGHT ON

“Then why won’t you let me put a dragonling in you?” 1) i snorted. 2) it made me think. its ok with your point of view. but since ive seen the beginning as reader dying during the labour, i though she might be frightened of actually getting pregnant? yes its been 2000 years but. she not likely got pregnant throughout this time.

i totally understand what you mean............................................ what if i told you................................................................................... i envisioned she had a kid in her 2000 year wait............................................................................................................ ok but honestly more of an adoptive parent. but idk im still on the fence about come on she has been alive for 20000000 yearSSSSS there should have been at least ONE PERSON AT LEAST ONE PERSON that she let get close to her, thus the plotline i told you about the ex lashfalkfhalsfh OMG GIRL I JUST THOUGHT OF A REALLY MESSY TIMELINE FUCKKKKKKK HELP

'not liking his indirect insinuation of weakness' GASLIGHT GATEKEEP GIRLBOSS YES!! love her.

PURR EXACTLY

the domestic atmosphere of their interactions is making me smile so softly. AND daemon caring about wifes well-being in the first place after shes gone? equals him being smug before.

I love the domestic atmosphere between them too!!! T_T we love a caring husband even though its rooted in his own self interest T_T idk what you mean about him being smug before but yes he is always smug anyway so HAHAH

OH AND IM THE GOVERNMENT JFHCXJSDJ weve talked abt it so it was cute to find it in the fic. youre such a sweety<з

I HAD TO PUT IT COS ITS SO FUNNY

STILL pretty awkward interactions with aemond make my heart clench. hes so timid and so emo for this. understandable that 1) he respects his professor 2) hes in love w/her 3) thus he wants her to be happy and hes the type to let her go find her happiness in another place 4) hes suspicious. but so emo TT

im a bit amused that you find aemond timid. perhaps in the face of yn and daemon, in comparison, he does come off like that, but also i think its just him being younger than both of them and not yet being so sure of himself yet. i think he also senses something between them that cannot fight against his 'love' his crush which is just silly or childish. so he would not yet speak on his feelings while their dynamic is mentor and student lol we'll see

and your intro to the 'investigation' (hope im not saying some ridiculous shit to you)! this book intrigues. and now im really inerested if shes gonna tell aemond anything. bc she like had intention to do so?... im intrigued.

im still on the fence about yn talking about the whole thing in general. i mean she's halfheartedly spoken her truth to multiple characters, but it was hard for her FOR ME to be even able to make her just to viserys that she loves daemon so much. so a part of me is thinking of making aemond her confidant, wherein he knows everything about her and no one else does but also im thinking what if hes so highstrung on figuring out this mystery its suddenly shown to everyone, daemon, aegon, aemma, everyone, BUT him and then when he finds it out for himself, hes like betrayed because everyone found out without even digging into it. but then if i take that route, i could make him into a villain and 0.0 the plot would get mega twisted HAHAHAHAH. also what you said is not ridiculous. you totally caught onto me foreshadowing the fact aemond is going to try and find out about her

so THE king coming to the museum. its interesting how hes so calm and thoughtful(?) and its relieving how hes so protective of his brother. even if hes against the wedding and dont know this woman, he knows his brother is in love and goes crazy bc of her so hes being the real kepa and going and trying to solve it all.

VISERYS BEING THAT DAD TO DAEMON THAT HE NEVER WAS TO HIS KIDS (OTHER THAN RHAENYRA) IN HIS PREVIOUS LIFE. redemption arc real. HAHAHAHA. i mean in the show this was the whole vibe viserys gave to me. also the actor in general. him and matt are so brothers irl <3

i also see them having a nice conversation with logic, calmness, respect and all and daemon rushing in and ruining it by screaming smth like 'fckng viserys i love her'.

I ALMOST WROTE SMTH LIKE THAT but i felt like it would kill the whole chapter so i didnt maybe for the next one

also. i always read the last line before reading smth. and i was so amused by seeing aegons plain and loosey text to aemond. theyre so bros here i love them TT

????? HLKASHDHASD why do you read the last first??? but yes they are SO BROS IN THIS I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

overall, this part was more about daemon, domestic interactions, spoilers(?) of forthcoming events and symbols so no tears. (NOT a dare)

HAHAHHHAAHH. there arent spoilers what do you mean ASL:FHASFAS SPOILERS ARE LIKE INFO OUTSIDE THE STORY THAT IS TALKING ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS NEXT so i think you mean foreshadowing. i mUST make you cry next time

im very proud of you for writing so much.

THANK YOU MY LOVE PROUD OF ME TOO

i appreciate your efforts soso much! and oh how big brained r u in this part! ig all your plans were given the greatest expression and a start! youve done SOSO good! thank u so much for the time, thoughts and hard work you invest in this! hope youre proud of yourself as well. bc you deserve it. you and your fics deserve much more love than tumblr can ever provide.

AWWWWWWWWW THANK YOU SO MUCH MY LOVE YOUR WORDS MEAN SO MUCH TO ME IM HONORED TO RECEIVE YOUR WORDS OF AFFIRMATION AND APPRECIATION <3

take care! love you<з

i love you <3 take care as well

xxx

[ziracona]

The tendency in fandom to take every white girl with short hair, regardless of the status of their canonical interest or lack of interest in women and explicit interest and/or sexual history with everything but, proclaim them a lesbian queen, and then ignore or absolve them of every single horrific act they take in fiction because of this. Is not doing feminism. Women. Lesbians. Or anyone. Any favors. It’s just bad.

Somehow. Some people really do apparently need to hear that...being any specific sexuality...is not a personality trait.

And also. Women aren’t inherantly less vile than men (or anyone non-binary, agender, fluid, etc, else), and whatever bad deeds they do should be judged based on just that—on the deeds, and their context. Not their sexuality, imagined sexuality, or their gender. Becuase none of those things effect whether committing murder is bad. At all. Not even a little. And none of them. Is even a personality trait. Affecting the character’s value as a person.

It’s cool, and good, to see characters with minority identities. And it’s real nice. When it’s whatever you are. But them being whatever. Is not a personality trait. Just a fact. And sometimes. People of any type. Are not good. Pretending any minority status—gender, sexuality, race, disability, neurotype, etc—is a get out of jail free card? Is not. Doing them. Or anyone. Any favors. Personality disorder. Doesn’t make you bad. Also doesn’t make you good. Your actions do. Acting like Amy from Gone Girl did nothing wrong when she date rapes her boyfriend & then frames him for doing that to her & ruins his life, then blackmails her husband who is terrified of being murdered by her into staying with her for the sake of the child she made at a fertility clinic with his sperm without his consent, bc she’s a woman. Isn’t good. Men aren’t more deserving of violence than women. Neither is anyone else. Jane. Left an infant child in an unheated car in subzero weather in a snow storm with zombies around that easily would hear it cry and go eat it. So she could lie and say she already let zombies eat it to bait a man with easily triggerable PTSD who had just lost his family to zombies for the second time into starting a fight. Because he was injured, unarmed, weak, down an eye, and 50, while she was fit, mid 20s, healthy, and armed with a hunting knife. Because she wanted an excuse to kill him without looking bad, because she wanted the 11 year old girl she was co-parenting with him, all to herself. And her immediately responding to the dude throwing a punch by stabbing him in the stomach to escalate the fight from brawl to life or death, then losing her knife, and instead of telling him the baby was alive & she’d made it up to start a fight which could have at any point ended the fight, begging the 11 year old child to gun down her oldest surviving friend with her own hands in cold blood so that she’d get what she wanted? Is evil. As is crying on the 11 year old and using pity as a weapon to get her to stay with her if she gets mad and wants to leave when she realizes Jane staged the whole thing for an excuse to murder, and so is after realizing like a month later that she is pregnant, committing suicide, and leaving the 11 year old that she just manipulated into killing her oldest surviving friend/completely isolated on purpose so she could have her to herself, totally alone in the apocalypse to care for an infant. Jennifer’s Body? Is a fantastic film. And Jennifer didn’t deserve any of what happened to her. But not one single boy she kills during the course of that film deserved it—and explicitly so. Even the guy who could easily have been a meathead jock bully is outside alone crying becuase his best friend just died and he loved him before she decides to lure him off and eat him alive. And acting like it’s totally fine & Needy should have just let her keep eating boys instead of killing her? Is fucked up. None of them deserved to die. And no one deserves death innately more because they are or are not something that is just a factual designator of their makeup as a human. The exchange student was scared and alone and nice, the catholic kid was sweet and Needy’s friend, Chip is a bad boyfriend but he meant well and being stupid doesn’t mean you deserve to die. And this girl ate them alive. That’s not funny. Or cool. Or fine becuase they were dudes. Gertrude Robinson? Chose again and again to betray people who loved her, or trusted her—sold out victims of awful trauma to their worst nightmares. Killed friends in the worst possible ways, like it was nothing. Michael loved her, and trusted her, and tried to care for her, and she without faltering fed him to his worst nightmare and forced him to become it. There is nothing excusable about that action.

Jude Perry? Has 0 redeeming features. Didn’t even stay faithful to her poor gf & was creepy obsessed w Agnes. Literally murdered her co-worker friend just because he was happy, and she wanted to destroy things: that’s it. She didn’t even dislike him. Murdered him because he had a wife and kid and house and it seemed fun, then burned down his house, took his wife’s money, and now checks in on his kid every so often in case he ever recovers from the trauma she inflicted enough to be fun to kill. There is literally nothing good about this woman. Yes. I mean that. Because being a lesbian? Is just a thing. There is no g/b tag, there is no tag at all. Amanda Young? Got kidnapped and tortured and forced to choose between killing a man who couldn’t resist but was conscious to watch her, and letting herself die, and she killed him. Then, instead of responding to that trauma with guilt or responsibility or anger at her captor, joined up with him and started helping him kidnap people just like her. She was not forced, she was not lied to. It does not matter if John was manipulative; she is a grown ass woman and like all grown ass adults, responsible for her own actions and choices. She did not get manipulated pitifully into this—she did not go unwillingly. She volunteered, with a happy vengeance, became obsessed with John and in love with him, despite his complete lack of interest. And she did not even just do what he did. She decided on her own that no one deserved redemption, & she killed them for fun in traps that wouldn’t let them go even if they did whatever awful thing the trap demanded as a price for life, just for the fun and power trip of watching them die helpless & in agony. That was all her, & her alone. She sat in a house full of people slowly dying from organ decomposition over the course of a few hours, for no crime worse than drug addiction—the thing she of all people should have been most sympathetic to—knowing full well at any time she could have saved them and stopped the game, and did nothing. She held a woman in her arms and stroked her head lovingly while she let her die in one of the most inhumane ways possible for the crime of having not been able to break an addition. She got saved by a 16 year old child multiple times, who had done nothing more than shoplift, and stood by while he had to watch a man get his brains blown out, another burn to death in an oven. As his organs slowly dissolved too. Watched the kid kill another human being & massively traumatize himself to save her life. And responded to that by attacking & knocking him out, tying him up, locking him up for days in a tiny safe bound and gagged with an oxygen supply to keep him alive, to be a piece in another game. Left his father, who had shown up to try & save him, to starve to death in chains in a horrible abandoned rotting room, & never even told him his son was alive. Let every other addict die horribly, let that kid sustain permanent damage to his organs that will kill him young, antidote taken or not, took his dad from him, & went back to torturing without a second thought. Kidnapped a woman whose worst crime was being a doctor & dating someone while maybe separated instead of divorced from her husband, put her in a trap that would take her head off with shotgun blasts, threatened her for fun, & then killed her even after she did everything she was asked, because it was more important to her that the old man she was obsessed with think she was special and great, than for the other woman to get to stay alive another day & go home to her daughter. There is nothing sympathetic about Amanda. She’s just not only evil, but too spineless to take responsibility for her own choices & actions, & tries to hide behind a “UwU I am sad & lonely & damaged & having trauma means I can literally torture people to death to feel special & it’s really tragic and sympathetic about me, not evil. Uhm. Some people??? Commit torture-murders?? To cope??” And acting like she’s somehow a victim in this becuase she is a pretty white girl with short hair? Is fucked. Up.

But every. God damn. Time. I see this. Please. It needs. To stop. People go: “UwU pretty girl short hair want” & I go “Ok. I see where u. Come from. Indeed.” But then. They go. “Girl pretty I like. So she was blameless. For this atrocity.” Those words...

Every day. I wake up. Thinking of Janic saying. Iconically. “At least me and Regina George know we’re mean,” and I weep inside. Because I cannot fathom. Or stomach. The lack of responsibility. I will kill. Characters who cannot admit they are bad. Myself. But somehow. They become. Flames. To moths. Of the “UwU pretty white girl short hair. We stan. Victim. Queen. Love her. Never done wrong.” Boy. We all done wrong. Even all my faves. At least once. I think. ...not if we count dogs probably, but people, yes. Ok. Anyway. All this is to say. Characters. Should be judged. Based on what they did. And why. And the aftermath. Not a grouping tag. I don’t mean any of these. Make bad characters. At all. Amy is a great character. So is Jennifer. So are most of them. I have quite affection even. For Jeneffer specifically. But you can like. Character. Without proclaiming. Them perfect humans. Who never did a thing wrong. Or their acts somehow. Justifiable. And ok. And you better stop saying. Ok. Because done. To men. Men do not. Deserve violence. Any more. Than anyone else. No one deserves violence defacto for factors. Outside their control. Wtf. Really people. It’s ok too. For character. To do much bad stuff. And still like character. Villains. And often just complex characters. Sometimes just characters. Do stuff. That is bad. It’s not supposed to be not their fault. Or ok. Also. Women are not a sisterhood. Of flawless beings. Who never hurt anyone or do any bad stuff. They can. And are. Often purpotrators. Of awful acts. And when they are. It is still. Very bad. Still. An awful act. Same level. Even. Of awful. Wild.

In conclusion.

Having short hair. While a girl. Doesn’t make her a butch queen. Who is absolved of all responsibility for that murder she committed. It just makes her a girl with short hair. That did a murder. I’m gonna. Kill someone. Too. And if I chop my hair off. I guess I can get away with it.

[musherum]

For the ask meme: primes?

who is/are your comfort character(s)?

i dont really know if i have one anymore. sometimes, when im upset, i'll imagine kim kitsuragi from disco elysium shit-talking people im mad at, or him telling me that im doing okay. but i dont know if that really counts?

i used to have lots. but ive mostly moved out of that stage in my life. idk, i guess it felt in a way slightly infantile, and not like a great way to engage in media - and also like it was kind of a flattening of myself, if that makes any sense.

2. lighter or matches?

matches are soooo tantalizing. i love striking a match. but they disappear so quick! so i prefer a lighter, generally. the flint mechanism is also fun to play with, though i understand that is pretty unsafe to do.

3. do you leave the window open at night?

yes, usually. i like to keep fresh air flowing in, to keep myself from overheating or starting to wheeze. and i get to hear the crickets :)

5. what color are your eyes?

a fairly unremarkable blue. looking into them sometimes reminds me of looking down through the water at the beach, into the sand. but mostly they are fairly poetically uninteresting.

7. hair-ties or scrunchies?

hair-ties, usually. scrunchies are fun and cute, but i usually put my hair back for utility, and not for fashion or to look cute - i dont have a good relationship to the shape of my forehead and brow, or my jaw or chin, so if im trying to look nice ill generally leave my hair down. so cute scrunchies arent really something ive invested in.

11. favorite extracurricular activity?

i dont think i did many extracurriculars as a kid. i was in cross-country for a bit. i liked it okay, i liked going fast. but my asthma got too bad, and i started collapsing and not being able to finish races.

i was in a writing workshop in middle school, but honestly despite me always getting good grades in english, and despite me always being my english teachers favorite, i simply was not and am not a very good writer, at least not of fiction. idk, maybe i just need to practice more and stop judging everything i make like its the thing that will make or break my worth as a person. either way, i didnt attend the workshop for long, because of life-ruining depression

13. when was the last time you ate?

a few hours ago? my sister was over to do laundry, and i defrosted the veggie shepherds pie filling i had in the freezer, and made us both little shepherds pies in some ramekins.

it was pretty okay. i mixed the mash with some goat cheddar because i was out of parmesan, and it turned out nice. browned well, light and puffy. the filling was missing something. maybe it just needed some acid or something. idk

17. are you farsighted or nearsighted?

im nearsighted. thats one of the biggest reasons i dont wear my glasses very often - keeping them on, when im doing tasks that involve my face being just a few feet away from my point of focus? gives me a headache.

19. imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?

i could try? im not very good at it though :( i cant even paint my own nails without making a mess of it.

23. how do you feel about chilly weather?

already answered!

29. how do you like your shower water?

depends on the weather, and what would feel most refreshing. in the summer, i usually let my shower water run slightly cooler. but then again - after a hard day, when im full of aches and pains, nothing hits better than hot, hot water pouring down on me. so i guess it depends on the weather and how tiring my day has been.

31. what type of music keeps you grounded?

i usually listen to more energetic electronic music, but when i need to ground myself or bring myself back from the brink, i usually lean towards something slower and singable and maybe a little bit sad or morbid. half the time i wont even listen to it - ill just sort of wail along to it.

37. someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?

this is a tough one. aside from some family friends?? ummm. drawing a blank here, i stopped communicating with a lot of other people from earlier in my life a long time ago. the closest thing i can think of would maybe be a couple of tumblr mutuals? and even then, theyre maybe, like, 8 or 9 years, tops.

41. how do you take your coffee?

already answered!

43. what’s your take on spicy foods?

already answered!

47. what was the last message you sent?

i asked my youngest sister if she was coming over tonight to do laundry, and if she wanted me to make her something to eat.

thank you for the questions :)

[prompt-master]

Kazfort -I'm lazy don't mind mi- anon is here

Yeah specific characters to use

Mm

Okay! Let's start

1- Nekomaru Nidai

2- Kazuichi Souda

3- Chiaki Nanami

4- Hajime Hinata

5- TanaKa tHe fOrbidden

1. Im sorry any Nidai stans, but I don't like him. I mostly had a neutral stance on him, but Mechamaru instantly made me dislike him because it broke the fundamentals of the game. His existence really ruined a lot of the enjoyment for me, I instantly felt bored and didn't care as much. I understsnd the whackiness was a hint that the world is virtual, but I didn't care at all when he died in ch 4 and ive always said thats not good in a dr trial.

2. I love Souda, he's an interesting character with a fun personality whos also fun to bully a lil wee bit a lot. My main gripe with Souda is that he is the only survivor to not fit the theme (all the survivors have someone to mourn besides him). Its the only thing i want to change in regards to him. I like the potential he has to grow as well considering his background, so i love to play around with post game concepts for him.

3. I'm going to admit this to you all. At the tender age of 14 when i first played sdr2 i fell instantly in love with Nanami. Yes thats right. I took the waifu bait. But in all seriousness: I really like how Nanami's character gets recontextualized by the reveal that shes an AI. Especially when yoh realize so many of her traits connect back to her being an AI down to her talent. Her role in chapters 5 and 6 completely played with my heart in the best way, and her execution theme slaps a little too hard. My only issue with Nanami is that i dislike the dr3 retcon of her being a videogame AI and instead being a human girl

4. Shit man whats not to love about Hinata. Fantastic protag, fantastic (altho mostly predictable) backstory, fantastic character. I felt completrly invested in his emotional struggle. And i love how they twisted things so that it was HIS game. Yes, he stands for hope just like Naegi did. But its his OWN version of hope. Hinata is a big part of what makes sdr2 so special. I love his realist outlook and attitude, even if he leans to pessemist at times. I just with danganronpa would draw him with 91 cm tits.

5. Tanaka is a good character. But he deserved better in ch4. I wanna preface this by saying i could be inaccurate cuz i black out in ch4 from boredon. But his motivation makes little sense to me. Hes trying to save everyone and trying to show them the value of life and not giving up. They frame it as this noble thing. His actions however contradict nobility. There was no need for two people to die for a sacrifice (which also goes again how the ch says life shouldnt be wasted. Cuz well. A life totallt was wasted) its also not noble since he kept the mystery alive which put the others at risk

I always thought it wouldve been more interesting with a couple of slightly different dirrections. For example, the murder is caused by a lack of judgement on Tanaka's part from starvation. He was trying to do the right thing, but wasn't thinking about how only one person needed to die to save everyone and prove life is important. It could also be explained as a lack of judgement simply by virtue of his character.

Something i really like is the idea that Tanaka believed if there was no good mystery, then the mastermind would not let them go so easily. So he sets up a mystery in hopes to not waste Nidai's life. It could explain why he didn't think of suicide as an option, and why he kept the secret. It also leaves room for some reallt good recontextulation of the trial where we could realize Tanaka was trying to help us catch him the entire time.

Another interesting direction is the idea that Tanaka did not fully understand tbe responsibilty of his actions until after the murder was comitted. He would realize after the fact that if he is executed, his hamsters are left alone without him. After all theyve been through. He suddenly realizes he cant bare that. And so he panics, and has a moral dillema the entire trial. Does he keep quiet and try to survive so he can continue to live for his pets at the expense of his friends lives? Or does he follow through with his plan and allow himself to die so that everyone can get a chance of life but at the expense of his own life and leaving his devas alone? In the end, he can say that he deseeves the execution regardless because of how he nearly let them die, but its Sonia who tells him hes a noble and good person.

Idk, i rareely see people complain about ch4. But to me its a boring victim and a boring killer. The only really interesting thing in the chapter was komaeda

[kendrixtermina]

Now here's an all new theory for where the procrastination comes from

Like the uni councilors thought of like generic selfhate insecurity or like spineless ppl pleasing (nope an anime cured me of that when I was 13 - thst sounded more like what that ladys own problems might be), fear or failure & wanting to spite my father, eveb that getting ahead through "talent" was an unfair advantage bad tainted and evil, or that "talent" meant being beholden and controlled by others (definitely somewhat right - we worked on that, it helped, the second guy was defs much much more helpful & compatible cause he focussed a lot more on strategies than wannabe-maternal pep talks) but there was always something else there that wasnt getting touched

In tje end I dont think I have talent and in any case what really matters is attitude toward "living the examined life" for example whst you do. What you notice.

Now I did notice that things get harder to do precisely because I actually want them(whereas a lot of ppl get distracted from stuff because they dont really want it) - at the same time I can totally function or pick up new habits in day to day life its not like I have some "hardware problem" like, say, ADHD or the like.

Like of course its some emotional knot it couldnt be anything else but I feel they didnt identify what kind of knot? Certainly not that first lady. If im trying to get clarity and you give me reassuring pep talks you just freak me out more for the love of god tell me whats happening. Nothing worse when a Doctor says "it will be over soon" rather than explain the procedure

Fear of/ distraction from wanting itself never really occured to me thats not a common stereotypical fear that ppl talk about.

Let me get this straight I never thought I was better than anyone I knew very well that I'm not. I thought of both those things as ways not to get bullied, maybe get somewhere where I feel that im in the right place.

If I look back at really breaking experiences it was times I really really wanted something and then I couldnt do it or some outside party stepped on my fingers. That Tori Amos Music Video where she escapes from a psycho killer's trunk and then the passerby's dont help her? That was my most favorite music video in the world for years maybe still is.

Like I was told I could maybe skip third grade and I poured all my energy and passion and strenght into that everything I had to do well, make friends with the new class i was so highly motivated I aced all the exams I felt so happy & fulfilled just being in thst flow state all the time... i wanted this more than anything. Maybe it was the first time I really wanted something beyond vague dreams or base desires. But the homeroom teacher hated my guts and put the kibosh on that; Probably because I was unwittingly repeating some of the artogant classist shit my father spouts without realizing how hurtful it is. my parents thought it wasnt worth going to the higher ups for that but having to essentially redo 4th grade in a crap school in the different town we moved to was one of the worst times of my life. Also I didnt find out that the teacher had hated me/acted in a petty way until years after I thought I just failed. That there was a possible place I could have belonged but turns out I really belong nowhere after all.

All my effort was for nothing. It was such a joy - i mean these days even getting code to work or solving math problems has that same joy - but all that effort and joy and wanting did was that... im tearing up and searching for the words to even process this tbh. I think I denied that joy, told myself that I was just a stupud kid thinking I was a special snowflake. It didnt even matter.

Rather than insist on staying up late to make sure my homework was done I just stopped caring and hardly did another piece of homework in my life just faking it on the spot or coasting through. It could have gone another way maybe if it werent for the bullies and my father the chief bully or if only I was more determined but it was like "okay I dont care anymore I just dont care" and I think thats stayed my default response to dissapointment to this day.

This TV show didnt turn out like I wanted? I dont care its just a tv show.

My father treated be with hatred all my life? Its okay I dont care about him and I dont want his love anyway.

Like there were other times when I thought I could be happy.

Like I really wanted to go to this boarding school for gifted kids. Again I thought maybe incorrectly that this would be a place where I can belong and not be bullied it was never about being better than anyone.

Again I wanted it I clamored and cried and made noise nonstop. Maybe I still hadnt wholly lost contact with willpower back then. I still thought of myself as strong willed.

And my father made me regret it. It was around the same time that mom briefly considered divorce maybe I was just the stress valve. Or he took it personally as wanting to get away from him. Duh he abused me of course I wanted away from him. He was such a suffocating control freak! Mom said yes first then he spoke to her and suddenly she followed everything he said. Thats when I really realized how emotionally manipulative was how abusive... i mean one of my first conscious memories of him is thinking "oh crap I will be just like cinderella" but he really laid it on so thick so transparently even a 10 year old could tell its manipulation. If you do this you dont love your mom. If you do this you dont love your siblings. If you dont obey me your mom will kill herself. No she wont you jerk even my 2 year old self could tell youre abusive.

The most cruel thing he did was briefly say yes. Again I got so happy. So invested. Just bending all I was towards that even though he bombarded me with abuse and mental torture.

And then on the day we were supposed to leave he said no youre not going.

Maybe I actually did say I didnt want to go because of one time he was doing this constant scientology type torture on me

That same reaction: "I dont want it I dont want anything so please please let me be"

Ppl think of bad childhoods as a game that you win if yoz turn 18 -or 28 maybe - without killing yourself. But its not. Every year you live it can take away from your potential. Every day less than you have to live it

He sure didnt let me have sucess with his overcontrol and abuse. Anything I was proud of he rules. When I graduated from school with a fairly good but not perfevt final score he humiliated me. When I turned 18 he humiliated me. Everything I did was a burden even just feeding and washing me. Hed give me unwanted white elephant gifts then bitch about how giving them to me ruined his life cause he had to work so muxh "Ingrate Ingrate Ingrate" Butch I never asked for anything I want nothing!

But as I had to eat I did in fact have to ask things of him and I hated it so much.

No wonder that I turned out afraid of wanting things eh?

Hed seen some poster when we went to see tje school I wanted to go to - not by the school by an individual student - about the history of abortion portrayed in a positive way or at least that was his official reason why I couldnt go. Again I had wanted something badly with all my being and again all my being availed nothing. Irrelevant like I didnt exist. All my screaming gone unheard.

And this is so silly cause im not a child anymore I have control and if I were to stop procrastinating I could have money and gave even more control.

I havent even spoken to him in years now hes no longer relevant. Its not about him its about thus bad pattern I picked up.

I like how this books handles it with the idea that certain experiences dont create the type but that it nakes you uniquely suceotible to certain kinds of hurt or certain misunderstandings.

Because with all this discourse about bad message free media ive really come to think that while it can and should be minimized its not possible to eradicate cause human mibds are so quicl so fallible to extract overgeneralizations and make it mean something abput themselves

Like an immature statistical learning model easily overtrained by noisy data.

Another time I was nearly happy was when I started looking for work, doing my thesis...

Same pattern I was engaged, happy to be engaged talking to ppl at both work and in the uni work group loving it all so much...

my life had started to feel meaningful again. And it had gotten to that point in part because of my ex-fiance. Yes the councelling heloed taking up meditation helped, getting high on morning glory that one time helped a whole lot got more self esteem from that than I ever got from my father.

But that all started because of my ex fiance.

He was an i tellectual type and he had a sense of purpose about him like hes a legendary character and everyone around him became legendary too. And he found me useful! Others had called me "walking dictionary" with mockery and scorn he called me his google and it meant love and admiration. Maybe I got a bit of an ego trip off of tjat but I also really stupidly dumbtastically loved him I bragged of him to anyobe who listened everything he did seemed fascinating abd interesting and meaningful, but also I just loved the sweet gentle warmth of being next to him in the morning. Once again I was happy and everything was joyful even when it was hard, I felt strong and meaningful and useful and I let myself openly want things.

And then it all blew up. Worse yet i was so mistaken abozt him it really shook my confidence in my own judgement or any sense of clarity. I was si confused during the fucking breakup like I hadnt been since I left my father's house.

Google hah! More like his personal Alexa! It turns out he didnt respect or like me at all.

I couldnt even be sad or angry cause it was all my mistake. The one feeling I allowed - and even that took me weeks to identify - is dissapointment. Heavy leaden dissapointment i didnt even kniw that was a feeling you could feel so strongly. I didnt even do anything wrong you have to open yourself to have love. He could habe choosen to love me he just simply didnt. He probably thought he did but he wouldnt evebn do something as simple as not make fun of my voice or clean when I am sick.

Once he started putting me in the "wife" role he just became unable to see me. His loss really cause I think he wanted to keep me from all those annoying texts and email he had the nerve to write.

By all means I was right to trust but also right to leave later but still my sense of certainty and purpose and meaning was totally shaken. He did the sort of romantic stuff I didnt think was real. I knew I loved him when we had this conversation about water on mars. He got me the perfect books for my birthday! He said I was pretty and a genius and looked just like an actress. He got me this titanic esque heart pendant with stars. We were stuck at midnight in a train station that one time and he pulled out a picnic rug two plastic glasses and a shampain bottle. It never worked out but he said he might take me to see the LHC! I really thought we would be buried in the same hole folks!. He had read that same steven Hawkings book that I loved. One of the rather few books he actually read as I would find. Sigh.

And I fell right back into that same old pattern. Dont care about anything dont want anything it would be stuoid unrealistic and silly to want.

When I first came to uni I also had this feeling of hapiness and belongingness and wanting, I was putting in an effort, talking to ppl more.. and when things went wrong the slightest bit I pulled by hand back from that like from an open flame.

And here I am years later most the sucess or contact I get is comments on my fanfictions.

I thought I was doing that, or drawing, because its Stakes/Evaluation-free (going by the fear of failure theory) or because at least with the ffs gratification/payoff for effort is immediate compared to original stuff or uni work. Its a nice little niche at least.

I mean I do care about it its not "just" distraction but maybe ive been profaning it in that way... and so etimes I dont even do that and go for full unadulterated undebatable distraction; Line to 7 I guess. Tje only reason I spoke face to face to anyone else than the delivery guy this week is that I had some doctors appointments.

But not its distraction from stuff Im too lazy to do or even from pressure like I always thought. But from wanting things.

So the original fiction went great while it was a distraction from school not so much when its one of the things I most want and actually have the time to do it.

Even thought thats the most practiced skill I have that I never stopped working on since I was 10. 🤦‍♀️

I mean they already explained that its basically like meditation. Or weeds. Or popup ads. Youve got to click them away as they pop up.

I always told myself thst I didnt have to be happy... and thats not even untrue actually but it would sure be neat to be happy again one of these days.

[darkarfs]

This is gonna make so many horrible people unhappy. EVERY Takeover has had at least one match-of-the-year candidate on it. Some of the most emotional moments in that brand have come from cards that even aren't quite as good. I even considered not doing this list, because, by all accounts, NXT Takeover: Tampa isn't even going ahead. But then I thought, fuck it, let's celebrate, taken all together, for my taste, the best wrestling product in the history of mankind. It's not just moves; it's emotional investment, sharply-focused, character-based storytelling, intricately-performed spectactle from the greatest physical specimens ever to lace their boots. It FINALLY legitimized Western women's wrestling in the mainstream (Michelle McCool, Trish, Molly, Mickie, Jazz, Victoria, you all were stunning performers in your own right, but you and your kind were, until NXT, only given 3 minutes: the longest women's match IN HISTORY, until 'Mania 32, was Trish Stratus vs. Mickie James at Wrestlemania 22, and it got 9 minutes.), it's got some of the greatest tag wrestling ever seen on ANY brand, it's created the longest-drawn storytelling ever, it's the best of the indies, the best of the WWE, wrapped up in a sequence of shows that were epic without being FIVE FUCKING HOURS LONG.

Where do I even start...?

Honorable mention: Takeover: R Evolution (I have to, because I've only got 10) Sami Zayn spends over a year, clawing and sweating and tearing walls down, just to get to the top of the mountain in NXT. He has the opportunity to cheat, but does it his OWN way, as beautiful, unique babyface Sami Zayn...before being no-scoped by his best friend, who debuted THAT NIGHT. The undercard isn't as strong, so I can't officially include it, but this payoff, this triumph, and this tragedy represents everything the first era of NXT was, and kickstarted it, truly, onto its first golden era. So, properly, then...

10. Takeover: Rival If you leave this list feeling like the title reigns, and thus, ERAS, of Zayn/Owens are a little under-represented by it, I completely understand. After all, so much good came from that time. American Alpha soldifying themselves as the dominant tag team, the Iron-Woman match between Sasha and Bayley, Becky Lynch putting all the pieces together, Enzo and Cass actually being GOOD...it was, still, at its heart, a developmental brand at that time. It had indie megastars, yes, but it also had the likes of Bull Dempsey. And that's not a dig at Bull Dempsey, it's just that those early Takeovers were an eclectic mix of skill levels, which is what NXT was at that time. It was a place to showcase these people. That said, some of these cards were truly *fantastic.* Case in point: Takeover: Rival. Not only was the undercard completely stacked (Hideo Itami vs. Tyler Breeze over-delivered; we had the first and still SOMEHOW ONLY Fatal 4-Way match between the Four Horsewomen; and Finn Balor vs. Neville was a solid match of the year candidate), but the main event was the first step in one of the most storied rivalries in the history of wrestling: Zayn vs. Owens. The video package is one of the best NXT ever did, and the match...was a masterpiece of simple-but unexpected booking. Zayn mistimes a leap to the outside, hits his head, and Owens responds by powerbombing him over...and over...and over again, until the ref stops the match. Zayn loses nothing, because he was never pinned, Owens is made to look even MORE the loathsome monster, and Zayn's title reign ends after just a month, without the champion nor the championship devalued in any way. It showed that NXT knew, even then, how to reward fans for their emotional investment.

9. Takeover: Portland Right now, NXT feels like it's approaching the very end of a special time in its life. Like it's on the verge of hitting critical mass. One of either Gargano or Ciampa probably leaving the company after the next Takeover, and the reign of the Undisputed Era seems to be crumbling, too. In yesteryear, this would indicate a raft of very important call-ups, neccessitating a shift in the roster and a period of calm centered around more patient character-building. NXT's existence now as a third brand throws that formula into uncertainty, but it definitely feels like they're ramping up to a finale, because goddamn, this is NXT almost at a point of self-parody. Every match is so. MUCH. Lee/Dijakovic is the pinnacle of HOT wrestling (and Lee, will you marry me?) Bianca Belair breaks out as an actual superstar...just as Charlotte decides to visit and to ruin everything, which is just dreadful timing. Gargano/Balor being everything we need it to be, and also Balor pinning Gargano with his fucking dick. And the Broserweights being VERY DUMB...but also VERY, VERY GOOD. The only thing that lets this card down...and this is obviously subjective...is that NXT has almost come TOO FAR, now, in its delivery on its main events, in that every kickout starts to beggar belief. On the level of Triple H/Undertaker at Wrestlemania 28, in that I still love it, but...hoo, it can be exhausting. Depends on how much Ring of Honor you like in your gumbo, I guess, but it feels like everyone on the roster is racing toward Tampa to explode, like a wrestling Crisis on Infinite Earths, and then MAYBE...things can calm down. Just a hair. Y'know, if Tampa even...still happens.

8. Takeover: Philadelphia If there's one man that's become synonymous with NXT, it's Johnny fucking Wrestling. You know, what would happen if a meerkat put on muscle mass and became the best set-piece wrestler this side of Daniel Bryan. We knew since he started his tag team with Tommaso Ciampa that he was an exceptional wrestler, but it wasn't until Philadelphia, and his INSANE match with Andrade "Cien" Almas, that we saw him as truly the industry's next star. It was the first Takeover match to go over 30 minutes (Sasha/Bayley at Respect went EXACTLY 30, don't @ me), it was the first NXT match to get 5 stars from Dave Meltzer (if that matters to you), and it set a new bar for Takeover main events. And while the undercard doesn't live up to it, it's still loaded with excellent matches. A.O.P. vs. the Undisputed Era is something special. Shayna Baszler makes her Takeover debut, and while she's nowhere near her prime, it cemented her immediately. Velveteen Dream and Kassius Ohno have a very fun match, and Aleister Black and Adam Cole have a ludcriously stupid no-holds-barred match, featuring two men doing with chairs what no one ought to do with chairs. But as good as all of that is, it's really a one match show, but what a match, and Ciampa ending it by being an utter bastard yet again.

7. Takeover: Brooklyn I Does the first Brooklyn Takeover feature Canadian Destroyers, 18 kick-outs and "fight forever" chants? It does not. Does it create moments of wrestling happiness that are rarely, if ever, replicated? It sure does. Firstly, Blue Pants appears and helps the Vaudevillains defeat Blake and Murphy. Seems quaint to look back on it, but it made everyone SO goddamn HAPPY that night. If you're forgetting, Leva Bates (that wrestling librarian in AEW right now) was once a comedy jobber in NXT, who wore Blue Pants. Adorable. Ignore what happened on the main roster (which is something you'll probably have to do with a lot of these shows, I imagine), but the Vaudevillains were once incredibly over (I promise!), and their win was one of several beam-inducing moments from this stellar night. Samoa Joe destroyed Baron Corbin at the height of his game, Apollo Crews debuted brilliantly (again, ignore what happens next!) and Balor and Owens' ladder match was also fantastic. Also, what's Jushin Thunder Liger doing here?? Wrestling like he's in his early 30s, that's goddamn what!! But of course, the reason we're all here is Sasha Banks vs. Bayley, and...there's still something in my eye. Anytime people want to rag on NXT for being "predictable," remind them that giving the people a moment they've genuinely prayed for...is a good thing. Bayley besting Sasha Banks at her prime just made us all...so happy. All of us. Everyone. When that curtain call took place, it was so earned. The narrative of women's wrestling dominated most of 2015, and this moment, this match, was the apex of that narrative.

6. Takeover: Chicago I And speaking of feelings...hello, Ciampa, you godless fuck. And so begins maybe the actual greatest rivalry in all of NXT. It is truly an odyessy, with twists, turns, injuries, betrayals, wounds torn open, and this is the nexus point. Well, the seeds had already sort of been planted, because Triple H knows what he's doing. Ciampa almost ALMOST turns on Gargano after their terrific match in the Cruiserweight Classic, only for the team to die another day...and what a death it was. After a great ladder match, the two stand atop the ramp, and you think "will it happen?" And the absolute bastards show you the copyright logo, just to make you think the show ends there, because it always does, seconds after that happens. You unclench, you breathe out, relax...Ciampa whispers "this is MY moment" and then...It is a perfectly engineered bait-and-switch, and exactly as vicious as it needs to be. Pats on the back, all 'round. This moment alone makes this a worthwhile Takeover, but there's also a hell of an undercard. The women's triple-threat (Ruby Riott vs. Asuka vs. Nikki Cross) is stellar, Bobby Roode and Hideo Itami have their respective best Takeover matches ever, and then there was Tyler Bate vs. Pete Dunne. An absolute show-stealer of a match, a star-making performance for both men (especially Dunne), it cemented the career of several men, and was a fully-formed GREAT show, as opposed to a good show in service to a storyline.

5. Takeover: Brooklyn IV Gargano and Ciampa's battle of brotherhood, betrayal and brainwashing was supposed to blow off at Takeover: New York, but because God hates necks, Tomato Champion was out of action, making this the final singles encounter to date, until Tampa (again, IF it even happens). This is the weakest of their 3 excellent encounters (which still makes it better than any match over SummerSlam weekend), but it also features Johnny Stupid running into a speaker, because his dumb ass can't seem to quit Ciampa. It's one of the greatest long-form feuds for a reason, mirroring Bret and Owen from 1993 into 1994, with all the repeated imagery, the callbacks, the nuances, the psychological cruelty. The street fight at Chicago II is MAYBE better, but this undercard, for me, is a lot stronger. It featured the Undisputed Era vs. Moustache Mountain, aka the Brothers Shithead vs. the Proud Circus Bear and His Beautiful Son. Velveteen Dream vs. EC3 was the closest NXT got to WWE-style storytelling and was still brilliant (remember when EC3 wrestled?), and HEY, wouldn't you know it, Kairi Sane was once a character with dimensions, as evidenced by an amazing match with Shayna Bazsler. But what makes this undercard truly stellar is Adam Cole vs. Ricochet. It is so nice to see Ricochet used well, etc., but I will still never stop pissing myself at Cole nailing him square in the jaw with a superkick WHILE HE'S MID-MOONSAULT UPSIDE-DOWN SWEET JESUS. Sometimes...sometimes...things fall exactly into place.

4. Takeover: WarGames (2018) The WarGames Takeovers are just so silly. It's a silly shoebox, filled with huge, silly men who only barely know why they're killing each other. It's as close as we ever get to WWE's now-terminal problem of "set aside whatever feuds you have right now, because it's Stipulation Month!" (see: Hell In a Cell, most Money In the Bank shows, though Elimination Chamber largely sidesteps this). The other Shoebox Takeovers are really good, no doubt, but this one stands head-and-shoulders above the rest. But there is not a bad match on this card. Kassius Ohno rides Matt Riddle's knee all the way to heaven; NXT shows why 2-out-of-3-falls is fast becoming its signature stipulation with the excellent blowoff between Sane/Baszler; Sexy Mindgames Prince had a star-making match against Tommaso Ciampa, showing why he may be the best overall character in NXT right now, and sweet lord, Aleister Black vs. Johnny Wrestling. It somehow showed that Gargano was JUST AS, if NOT MORE engaging as a dirtbag than as a good guy. And those Black Masses are presents just for me, a guy who tends to like more community theater in his wrestling than flips ("I ABSOLVE YOU...OF ALL YOUR SINS!"). And then we get to the Shoebox, and gosh it's silly! The Viking Experience, Ricochet and Pete Dunne take on the Undisputed Era, and...its a fucking LOT. 45 minutes of spots and smashing, with just a sprinkling of story, with Fish locking Dunne in his cage so he can't participate in the match. Since this seems to be what this match is designed for...let's rattle off some spots! Ricochet, jumping from one ring to the other! That amazing face-off that recreates the Captain America: Civil War poster! Perhaps the beefiest Tower of Doom in all of wrestling! And then Ricochet proving just how amazing he is...with the double moonsault off the top of the cage. What a stupid thing to do in an amazing, amazing show.

3. Takeover: Dallas I get it; a lot of people might not rank this Takeover quite so high. But it might be my actual personal favorite...? Overall...? More than any other Takeover, this show feels the most like it's filled with living, breathing superheroes. Many NXT stars are seen as just indie guys whose only gimmick is "I'm a very good wrestler," making them almost anti-WWE at the core. But NXT doesn't get enough credit for being, at its core, the best aspects of WWE. The showmanship, the things that elevate mere wrestlers to things like monsters, gods, and demons. I will always like my NXT WWE-style: the best wrestling cut with the most theater, the most camp. And Dallas is that concept, writ large. Baron Corbin coming out with lil' skulls on his shoulders. American Alpha finally becoming Super Saiyan Nerds. Asuka killing our hero, because Bayley is a person, and Asuka is a goddess who can perform brain surgery with her feet. Finn Balor coming out and going actual Texas Chainsaw Massacre on Samoa Joe. It's excellent wrestling, near-mythic visuals...and then we get to Nakamura/Zayn. The most special moment of a very special night. It is, from nearly every perspective, perfect. The hype of the crowd, salivating with anticipation. That moment when Nakamura appears in silhouette, and that violin note slides like a knife across steel, to reveal the man who set New Japan aflame. Sami Zayn getting the best possible swan song in a promotion built almost entirely on HIS back. The end of his era. That bit where they just KEEP PUNCHING ONE ANOTHER. I know it's not a perfect show (Balor/Joe stops for 3 minutes to address a cut on Joe's forehead, stalling its momentum; that Corbin/Ares match isn't as good as it could be) but that all means nothing. It's a sentimental choice, and I'd make it #1 if I could.

2. Takeover: New Orleans I went around and around in my head, and this one and #1 kept jockeying for position in my brain. But these top two Takeovers are literally note-perfect, from ship to shore, soup to nuts, top to tails. So if this is YOUR favorite? (Honestly, maybe 1 person I know who loves wrestling as much as I do will even see this mess). I'm here for you, and I understand. But this show has TWO 5-star matches from the Wrestling Observer, and I don't ever agree with that. In this case, I agree with BOTH, in the North American Championship ladder match, and the first (and so far, BEST) match in the Gargano/Ciampa feud. Everything. Is. Amazing. Shayna Bazsler became Women's Champion after BEAST-MODING her SHOULDER back INTO IT'S SOCKET to show that, YES, she gets pro-wrestling. Roderick Strong shocked the world (and the System) by joining the Undisputed Era and becoming the final Chaos Emerald needed to make that stable Super Sonic. Aleister Black took the championship from Andrade "Cien" Almas and SMILED, I fucking SAW IT! And it all depends on what you want from your wrestling, but Gargs/Tamps might actually be the best main event in Takeover history, at least from a storytelling standpoint. The crutch, the neckbrace. Each man going back to their DIY roots (the tag team - they didn't build another ring when that one broke), and then sitting side-by-side, like they did at the Cruiserweight Classic. Brothers. Completely spent. Destroyed. No one but each other. And then Ciampa shits any chance at redemption up the goddamn wall, cementing his own destruction. Every. Bit. Counts.

and #1...

Takeover: New York For a whole bunch of other wrestling fans, this has the greatest main event in Takeover history. But first, let's take a minute to appreciate how lucky we are, or were, that NXT exists. It justfies the existence of WWE, artistically, almost by itself. If this one's only slightly worse than New Orleans, it is argued, it's that the North American title ladder match was TOO good, and hurt every other match on the card. It has been argued. Not by me, but this one is somehow the most perfectly paced, perfectly sized wrestling card, on its own, ever. Every match, through alchemy or magic, manages to enthrall the crowd equally, and completely. The Viking Raiders vs. Grumpy Smaller Undertaker and the Human Pinball was off the hook incredible, and that warm "thank you" feeling has translated, currently to a man trapped in a room and a man trapped in Vince McMahon's scorn for smaller wrestlers, respectively. Matt Riddle and Velveteen Dream put on an absolute fantasy match, pitting the best of MMA vs. the best of WWE-style theatricality, and adds to the complete, demented character-world of this brand, and the fact that Dream WINS against one of the hottest new prospects is so deserved, and shows that he can, and will, shine forever brighter. Then AAAAGH WALTER vs. Pete Dunne! WALTER LAYS into poor Dunne, his chops alone having you believe that after the match, he's going to run into the arena's parking lot to FIGHT THE CARS. Then Shirai vs. Baszler vs. Sane vs. Belair and goddammit how do I even expound on that without crashing thesarus.com? And then Johnny Gargano and Adam Cole wrestled for. 40. MINUTES. With Gargano as the defacto heel because it was allegedly Cole's time. And by the match's end, he had the crowd more behind him than maybe they ever had been before. Is it a bit much? Yes. Too many kickouts? Probably. But it stands as the apex of Johnny Wrestling's journey. After everything had been taken from him: DIY, his health, his sanity, even his chance at revenge...the only thing he has left is the NXT Championship. And in that moment, he is invincible, he is more than enough.

What a show. What a host of shows.

Thanks for reading, everyone.

[blookmallow]

I FINALLY GOT SKYRIM MARRIED

i have a BEAUTIFUL WIFE

...who i went through a lot of shit for. this is. a lot of exposition, bear with me :’) im very invested in my character’s personal story here

so astrid had a very important special job for me and sent me to markarth to speak with the client directly

it turned out to be the apothecary’s assistant, who i was passingly familiar with already, so i imagine it was a bit of a surprise to both of us, but she got right to the point - a man broke her heart and ruined her life, used her to hurt the people close to her, abandoned her to go become a bandit, now she wants him dead

u can probably imagine where this is going,

this is the first time ive had a dark brotherhood job i was legitimately PSYCHED to carry out, you BET ill go fuck this guy up for you id do this for free

however, she also had... another request, one that wasn’t required, but something she really, really wanted

see she was very close with/practically another daughter to the shatter-shields in windhelm, the wealthy family who recently lost a daughter to the windhelm butcher

alain had manipulated her and used her to get to the shatter-shields, i dont remember if he stole from them or what happened there, but whatever it was, the shatter-shields blamed muiri for this and disowned her, throwing her out onto the streets with nothing

so she was used and had her heart broken by a man she loved, then was told it was Her Fault, and lost her home and her friends/the closest thing to family she had all at once, and was so hurt and desperate she turned to the dark brotherhood to get revenge on them all

she wanted me to kill nilsine too, the shatter-shields’ other daughter

SO we have this really complicated situation where, on the one hand, she wants alain dead for using her and ruining her life and hurting her friends, and like, he’s a bandit leader now, so he’s someone i probably would’ve easily killed off anyway, by “this is a video game not real life”/skyrim standards that’s a no brainer, i have no moral conflict with that and can’t wait to slash this guy’s head off

but on the other hand she’s so broken she wants a woman who used to be her best friend/practically her sister dead too. i dont know what nilsine’s role in this was specifically but these people were essentially her family, and they victim blamed her when she needed their support the most and threw her out with nothing and nowhere to go

and i had already done quests with the shatter-shields before this, so like, i know them too, and they’re sort of friends to me, i helped solve the mystery of their other daughter’s murder and now I’m being asked to kill the other. not to mention everyone’s going to think the butcher’s back/there’s a copycat killer/something and it’s gonna cause a panic again (even if the game doesn’t acknowledge that/directly show that happening, y’know) 

killing someone’s daughter when they’re still in mourning over the first, when they’ve come to trust you, when you’re the one who helped them gain closure over that first death already, is just. a stone cold thing to do

especially looking at it from my character’s perspective, she’d be especially torn on this because she’s a mother herself, but her children are girls she rescued from the streets - lucia was thrown away by her family, sofie was a victim of tragedy and was let down by the people in authority who should have protected and helped her

so medea would relate to tova as a mother and a friend but also relate powerfully with muiri as a victim in this

ultimately i don’t think there’s any real justification to kill nilsine here, i dont think you can really morally defend that, but. i was so drawn to muiri and wanted so badly to give her a shot at a better life and help her heal from all this, and knew she would become a marriage option if i did it bc id seen her name on the marriage options list before, her story fits in so well with medea’s, and like, i dont imagine im gonna have a lot of options for wives who would Know about my connection to the dark brotherhood/the things ive done and be okay with it, so if i went with her, there wouldn’t be a “keeping this horrible secret from my wife” aspect to deal with even though the game probably doesn’t acknowledge it if you do (i mean im still. keeping it from my kids, but. y’know. when they’re older)

and “talk this out with her and help her see how badly her mind’s been warped by the pain she’s been through” isn’t an option given to you, so

in the end i went through with it. killing alain was easy, just like any other bandit camp raid, but to get at nilsine without being caught, i had to sneak into their house when the family was asleep

which i expected would involve a lot of careful sneaking and laborious lock picking

until i realized i could just walk right in

because the door was already unlocked for me. because they consider me a friend and allow me into their home

and that somehow made it so much worse

i killed nilsine with an arrow, nobody heard a thing, and i ran for it before anyone saw me in there or realized what had happened

muiri gave me a special ring as a “symbol of her affection” for doing this, which i think is about the biggest sign i coulda hoped for lmao

i held off on considering marriage for the time though and finally decided i had to go back to windhelm to see if there was anything i could do to make amends to the shatter-shields even though they shouldn’t know it was me/make sure i didnt get seen by a guard without realizing it or something (though it wouldn’t probably matter anyway, guards saw me leave the orphanage immediately after grelod’s death and shrugged that off, so,)

my name’s still clear in windhelm, but...

tova committed suicide after she discovered what happened

she couldn’t cope with losing another daughter

so now the father is the only one left, coping with. the death of his entire family occurring within like a couple months

i didnt see what happened here i came back later so i dont know if this is something you can possibly stop or if its possible to witness the moment they find nilsine or tova’s suicide or if this just Inevitably happens whenever you come back

i feel terrible about this but theres. not really any going back now,

so. i went back to muiri

i dont know if this is what everyone says or not but her response was just. “i mean, yeah, why wouldn’t I be” i love her lmao

i wouldnt choose to get married in riften if it was up to me but thats how it be in skyrim i guess

my babies are here!!!! what!!!!

and a. random guy i dont recognize lmao :’)

just wandered in to see what was going on i guess. or maybe we’re friends and i forgot who he is entirely which would be kind of sad :’ )

maybe it was my long lost father... slipped out before i ever had the chance to realize it

however i actually. ended up doing this scene twice because, fun fact, there’s a glitch where if you don’t manage to catch up to your spouse to talk about where to live before they leave the chapel they can just fucking Disappear sometimes, :’  ) i couldnt find her anywhere after the wedding and finally looked it up and apparently she just fell into the void so i had to reload and run it again. we’re double married now

planned better this time and dressed better but anyway that elf guy didn’t appear this time but some other guy did, who i ALSO cant quite identify, he looks. maybe. kind of like lucas valerian? who is actually a friend to me and was one of the first friends i made so it’d decently make sense for him to come to my wedding, but weird if he came and camilla didn’t, and im not even sure thats him anyway, so i dont know what happened here all around

muiri’s mentor lady came too though which was sweet

im spinning this kind of as... like, medea was so drawn to her and felt so strongly for her she couldn’t bring herself to disappoint her and this was an eye opener for them both as a kind of. “look what kind of people we’ve let ourselves become” and their marriage as a new beginning, love coming from a place of desperation and darkness, starting over and hoping that the divines will forgive what they’ve done

medea’s not leaving the brotherhood but i mmmmmight try to be a little more careful about who i kill

i had intended for her to come live with me in markarth, she’s in on my. assassin life so having kind of this Other Side to my life made sense but... she met my kids at the wedding i guess and she wanted to live with them... which is really cute,

it feels really weird having this huge fancy house all to myself (and uh. argis, i guess) in markarth and having my wife and kids (and lydia, and a fox) all squished into the honestly kinda run-down whiterun house though i think im gonna work on getting the solitude house for them bc its. safer there than in markarth i feel like and ive heard thats like the fanciest/biggest house

there she is..... my Wife

she also sells things now but i feel bad accepting it when she gives me “my share” of the profit like.... babe thats your money i have so much adventuring money and i didnt do shit to help earn that,

i buy things from her sometimes but i refuse to sell her stuff bc i dont want to take any more of her money :’ )

even tho it. doesnt really matter, its video games, i know, but

found lucia, the fox, and muiri all on the bed at once

lydia was just standing like this for a rly long time after muiri moved in i guess she was suspicious but chilled out eventually :’)

gettin along finally

i just realized if we move to solitude lydia’s gonna get left behind though :(

i mean ill still come visit her but. upsetting

my one issue is that muiri still keeps saying “thank you for solving my-....problem.” every time i come in speaking distance of her which is. weird given that its the same line she had before we were married, like, she apparently doesnt get any new things to say, and is Really repetitive (imagine living in a small space with your partner and they say the same sentence with the same intonation every time you step within like 2 feet of them. how long til that gets old, do you think, ) and also its just like??? girl let that go we gotta stop dwelling on this or the kids are gonna start questioning what apparently massively important problem mommy solved

idk why she was laying on the floor but anyway my kids have started calling her “mama” now too and im not crying or anything

[rogerina-yee-haw]

“at least I’m one”

sd!gwilym lee x reader

chapter 5: “- the anticipated  sweetness”

[the goodbye] [the sadness & tenderness] [the broken rules and true affection] [the pain and eternal bliss]

summary: you and gwil met ten months ago; and he offered you to be his sugar baby almost immediately. you agreed at that exact moment, not knowing where it would get you.

warnings: smut, FLUFF!!, typos, grammar errors (as usual lmao)

a/n: Alice won’t show up in this chapter, sorry. it was too sweet to ruin it with her presence. next chapter is the last one!!!! sorry if this one is too bad!!!!

                                                    September.

“Five hundred pounds?” you sighed as you looked at the price. “Even my life costs less than this!”

This was a chic Versace dress you found at that one posh shop. You didn’t even know how you got there – you were just wandering across the mall; the next thing you knew – you were looking at the pretty but very expensive pieces of fabric.

You could afford this dress only if you worked with no sleep, days off and rest. Shit, you could afford a plain tee-shirt in this shop if you worked yourself to death for six months!

“Guess I’ll die as a poor bitch”, you thought to yourself. You still couldn’t stop looking at this dress; it was everything you ever looked in an evening gown; it was long with a side slit – just to expose your leg a bit; the long sleeves would cover your arms, and the lack of fabric on the back of the dress would give everyone a hell of impression. “It wouldn’t fit me perfectly; must lose weight before even thinking about buying it”.

“I can’t agree with that”.

You flinched at a sudden violation of your thinking process; you already wanted to step away and ignore the man who interrupted your thoughts when you looked at him.

And – oh Lord – he was gorgeous.

Tall, handsome as the Devil himself, in a visibly expensive suit and a smug grin on his face – this man was everything you’ve ever wanted but never had. You opened your mouth, trying to say something, but only gasped – he was too beautiful and rich for you to even try. “Mum was right when she said my shyness will be the death of me”.

“What to be shy about?” he raised his eyebrows; you frowned before you realized.

“Did I just say that out loud?” you quavered; he let out a laugh and looked at you again.

“I’m pretty sure you did; I wouldn’t be speaking to you if I didn’t hear you talking to yourself”.

You covered your face with your hands; you had never felt that ashamed of yourself. You were talking to yourself in a posh shop and this handsome man saw and heard you doing it? “I’m a disaster”, you mumbled. “Sorry you had to witness that”, you said, still covering your face.

“It’s alright. I talk to myself too occasionally”.

You finally were able to raise your head; so you looked at him suspiciously. Really? This fucking Adonis? Talking to himself sometimes? “That is hardly believable”.

“You have quite an opinion of me for the person whom I’ve just met”. Judging by the smile on his face you realized that you – again – expressed your thoughts about him being the Adonis out loud.

You looked down and gripped your hands into you handbag. “I guess being an embarrassment is my life goal”. You couldn’t bear looking at him; finally, you had the chance to hit it off with a handsome dude when you successfully blew it.

Well, you thought you blew it.

“Don’t apologize; it wasn’t embarrassing at all”.

You furrowed your brows and glanced at him. “Really? Not at all?”

He grinned and looked back at you. “Maybe a bit, but it was alright”.

You rolled your eyes at his words; this conversation wasn’t going anywhere further. At least, not with you. That blonde with a short red dress on could certainly get it with this pretty dude. Not you, in your high-waisted jeans and old hoodie with the Avengers logo on it. You didn’t even want to get started on your mum’s sneakers you had been wearing for a couple of years now.

You mum, by the way, always said that your insecurity was keeping you from all the good things in life. And even now, when this mysterious man was certainly interested in you – you didn’t see it. You preferred to drown in your doubt and insecurity. It was easier for you to shield yourself from the world.

“I’m Gwilym, by the way”.

You looked at his hand that he reached out for you; you were attentively examining his palm and fingers. “You know what they say about men with big hands”, Billy’s was echoing in your head, as you subconsciously bit you lip. Gwil suddenly felt really tight in his pants.

“I assume you also have a name”. You were out of your thinking process once again; you looked at him quickly.

“Y/N”, you responded softly as you shook his hand. You felt electricity travelling through your body; your ears were burning suddenly and your palms were sweating. What the fuck was that? “Really nice to meet you”.

He nodded, silently agreeing with you; “You know what they say about men with big hands…”

You rolled your eyes one more time, trying to make this fucker’s voice inside your head shut up. You were so invested in your thoughts that you didn’t even notice how lustfully Gwilym looked at you. He wanted to pull you to the closest dressing room and fuck the hell out of you. You were so incredibly beautiful and hot – and Gwil really had to restrain himself from taking you right then and there. Right in the middle of that shop, maybe.

“Do you mind going to dinner with me tonight?”

His voice wasn’t asking, it was demanding. You suddenly felt weak in your knees under his gaze; you could have melted as the snow under the sun just 'cause this man was looking at you like that. And that reminded you that you hadn’t been with a guy for a while.

“No, I don’t. I don’t mind at all”.

“Good”. He looked as if that was exactly what he expected to hear. “D’you mind giving me your address?”

Oh, you didn’t mind. You also didn’t mind if he would just fuck you in the nearest restroom.

But you were too shy to suggest such the idea.

“Will eight o’clock be alright?”

“Sure”.

You refused when he suggested driving you home; you lied about having to meet your friend so that you wouldn’t spend some alone time with him. “Gwilym”, you thought while waiting for the bus. “Such a pretty name”.

                                     ╰╮✾╭╯✯╰╮✾╭╯

You wake up because you dream is suddenly over – but not like there was anything more of interest during your first date. Just pure primal attraction that ended up with you being fingered by Gwilym in the elevator. It was pretty crazy for you as you have never been a person who would hook up on the first date, but Gwil turned you on so much that you couldn’t handle it. Now you’re happy all of it happened. Now you’re with the man of your dreams.

The sun shines through the curtains of the hotel room window, and you wince because of its brightness. You stretch a bit, trying to wake yourself up, and rub the sleep from your eyes.

“You look like an angel”.

Your gaze falls on Gwil; he leans to the bedroom doorway, a soft smile on his lips. You grin back at him and sit up on the bed, covering your bare chest with the blanket. “You look good too”, you say, observing him. He’s already in a suit, just without a jacket; his hands are in his pockets and he looks so damn hot. “Are you leaving?”

He shakes his head. “Just came back”. Gwil slowly makes his way to the bed and crawls right next to you. “It’s midday already, baby”, he says, reaching to your forehead and kissing it. “We’ve got exactly twenty-four hours before going home”.

“Have you decided what you’re gonna do?” you put your hand on his cheek and he leans into your touch. “That’s a good opportunity, you know”, Gwil chuckles and then sighs deeply.

“A good opportunity but a hard decision to make”, he mutters and kisses you delicately. “I might lose everything if I do it”, his voice is quiet and he looks at you, a glimpse of fear and hopelessness in his eyes. You cup his cheeks and make him look you directly in the eyes.

“Is money worth staying on the job that you hate? Is it worth wasting your time on the place where the boss is a total arsehole to you?” he shakes his head. “Then quit it. Take Ryan and Jack’s offer”.

“I won’t be a vice-president in their company”, he says, “I won’t have this much money if I agree. This is not what you signed-”.

“I don’t care”, you whisper and press your forehead to his. “I’m not with you because you’re rich. Sure, I love expensive gifts”, you both chuckle, “but I can live without them as long as I’m with you. I want you to be happy, Gwil”, you say breathlessly as his hands tighten their grip in your waist, “and I know this new job will make you happy. You won’t hate your boss, at least”, you add and he smiles, leaning closer to you, so that your foreheads are pressed together.

“Bosses, to be correct’, he replies; Gwil leaves a trail of kisses on your jaw. “And I’ve been hating them since we met”, you smile. “Don’t think it’s a good idea to work on my friends who ruined my deal on purpose”.

“Baby, they did it to get you here”, you answer, “to talk to you without your boss interrupting”.

“Yeah, this old bastard left the same day that we arrived on”, he mutters, sucking a hickey into your neck, “doesn’t know shit about his own fucking company”, you let out a gasp, when Gwil’s lips get to that sweet spot, right under your earlobe. You squeeze his shoulders lightly, and the blanket falls from your chest, exposing your breasts. “Acts like he’s the smartest”, Gwil covers your neck with love bites, “when in reality he’s too stupid to even make himself a cup of tea”.

“I guess talking about your boss turns you on”, you swallow hard and Gwilym pulls off of your neck and looks at you in confusion. “You got quite hard while talking about him”, you raise your eyebrow and palm him through his pants. He moans at the sensation of your touch. “Wish I could turn you on so quickly as old Smithers does…” you sigh dramatically and Gwil rolls his eyes, smiling at you.

“You little minx”, his lips are on yours the second he lays you down, flat on the bed, so he’s hovering over you. His covered bulge rubs your thigh and you moan into the kiss, and it gives Gwilym a sign to move further. His left hand trails down your body, paying special attention to your boobs, while the right one is on your face, cupping your cheek. Finally, his fingers rub your clit slowly and you whimper, when he does that. He kisses you fiercely and you try to unbutton his shirt when he puts one finger inside you.

“No”, you pull away, “don’t want your fingers. Want you”.

“Love, we’ve run out of condoms”, he caresses your face. You don’t give him the verbal answer immediately; instead, you unbutton his shirt and help take it off of him, and pull him into a heated kiss. It’s open-mouthed, with moans spilling from both of you, it’s demanding, as your hands wander across his torso, it’s bruising, ‘cause you tug on his bottom lip with your teeth.

“I want you to fuck me raw”, you whisper looking deeply into his eyes.

His eyes are widened the second these words leave your mouth. “You’re not on the pill”, he states as if you didn’t know this. You swallow and kiss him again, less roughly now. 

“Just pull out”, you say, “or is it too hard for you?” your cocky smile makes him go absolutely insane. His eyes sparkle with something you can’t quite read, something that makes you grow even wetter. 

He makes a move closer to your face like he’s going to kiss your lips and when you close your eyes, he suddenly pepper your neck with kisses. He sucks on your collarbone profoundly, leaving marks all over it.

“Mine”, he mumbles, biting on the skin between your breasts softly, “all mine”. 

You mewl in response, tugging on his hair and shutting your eyes in anticipation.

As Gwilym kisses all over your boobs, sucking on your nipples and touching just the way you like it, he notices your closed eyes and messy state; he smirks and moves back to your lips; his kiss is tender but searing. “Want you to look at me”, he rubs your clit slowly, almost lazily, making you squirm and whine. “Want to see your pretty eyes as I fuck you”. 

You help him unbuckle his pants, and when he’s fully naked, in all his glory in front of you, you almost howl. You can’t quite believe you’re going to spend your life with him – and love, joy, lust, and desire overcome you. You sit down on the bed, so that his cock is right in front of your face, and you pump him slowly, maintaining eye contact with Gwil all this time. His dominating side seems to fade away, when you put your mouth on the tip, passing your tongue over the slit. And when you look at him innocently, a grin appears on your face. He looks so fucking hot like this: lips parted, breath hitched, eyes filled with lust, a hand on your cheek. While keeping the eye contact, as you’re following his demand, you take all of him in your mouth. Gwil gasps and his hand is on your head, tugging on your hair slightly. “Fuck, baby, you feel so good”, he gasps, “but…”, your head starts bobbing up and down his cock, and he almost loses it. “Don’t want your mouth”, he pants, trying to catch his breath, “want you”.

You pull him out of your mouth with a loud pop, and he bends down to you, kissing you lusciously. He lifts you up and turns you over without any effort. “On your hands and knees, baby”, you obey happily and wiggle your bum for him. Gwil chuckles and smacks your ass, making you drop your head in between your arms. He lines himself at your entrance and teases you by sliding the tip of his dick up and down your slick folds. “You’re so wet, love”, he mumbles, rubbing your back gently. 

“All for you”, you’re heavy breathing – you need more. And he knows it. So he gives it to you.

Gwil slides into you effortlessly and stills for a moment, giving you time to adjust. When you tell him to move, he does it deliberately and leisurely, making the burning ache between your legs even hotter.

“Gwil, baby”, you turn your head just to look into his eyes, “harder, please”.

He stops moving completely. “You sure?” he always asks. Always keeping you comfortable. 

“Yeah”, you nod. You want to add, “Just destroy my fucking vagina”, but you decide to keep it to yourself. For now, at least. 

He pulls out of you only to slam back with all his length. You scream from pleasure and your legs are already wobbly and you know – a couple of more thrusts like this and you’re a goner. You don’t know where this ability to cum so quickly comes from. Gwil feels you clenching around him, and slows down a bit, silently understanding your desire to last a bit longer. 

“So tight, baby”, he whispers, smacking your butt and then giving your ass cheek a squeeze. He touches your shoulder and makes you get up so that your back is leaning against his chest. Huge mirror right in front of you gives the two of you the perfect opportunity to look, to watch each other in the state of pleasure. 

“Look how pretty you are”, he wraps his hand around your neck lightly, “look at you being wrecked by my cock. So beautiful, baby”. And you’re wrecked – with sweaty skin, messy hair and broken moans coming out of your mouth. 

Gwilym takes his hand off of your neck and puts it on your stomach, helping you move. His other hand massages your boob, making your head fall onto his shoulder. The sounds you’re making are no longer humanlike – but words of love are entangled along with them. You both kept your feelings deep inside for too long for them not to be said to each other almost all the time. 

You are the first to come, and Gwil holds you tightly and fucks you through your orgasm. He’s not far behind you and he comes rather fast, biting on your shoulder and grunting your name. 

You come back from your high and catch a glimpse of you two in the mirror. Gwil's face is buried in your neck, kissing and sucking on it. You intertwine your fingers with his and kiss his palm softly. The hotel room smells like sex, sweat, and love. And you know you’ll enjoy it for the rest of your life.

“I love you so much”, he mumbles while kissing all over your shoulders. You hum in response; when Gwil pulls out, you whine at the feeling of emptiness. He chuckles and walks to the bathroom - he comes back a couple of minutes later, with a wet towel to clean up the mess he’s made on our ass. You smile, feeling his touch; it never ceases to amaze you how much influence he has upon you.

“There you go”, he taps your butt lightly and then wraps his arms around your waist. You lean to him, pressing your back to his chest, and let your head fall onto his shoulder. You’ve never felt more comfortable and safe in your life, ever. It’s like you’re in your personal heaven, and you don’t want to leave his warm embrace.

“That’s funny”, he mumbles.

“What?”

“You tell me to leave the job that I hate, and I obey immediately”, Gwilym kisses the corner of your mouth, making you giggle. “But when I was telling you to quit that pathetic job of yours, you wouldn’t ever listen to me”.

“Well, I quitted it, eventually”, you raise your head and turn slightly to look him in the eyes. Gwil lets out an airy chuckle, through his nose, and shakes his head.

“And I’m really happy about it”, you smile softly.

“Of course you would be. I did it to come to Dublin with you”.

“Sounds like you’re regretting it now”.

You shrug your shoulders. “I could have been brain-fucked be Damian by now instead of just being with you. Dunno what’s better”, Gwil smiles and kisses you tenderly. Your neck gets numb, and you turn your whole body, your chest pressing to Gwil’s. The kiss is needy and sweet, with hands on cheeks, soft laughs and noses rubbing together. Every moment with Gwil is so intimate and soulful that you keep wondering how you could ever live without him. How did it happen that only ten months ago you met the love of your life?

“How is it possible”, Gwil says breathlessly in between kisses, “that I”, you kiss him heatedly again, “even had a life before you?”

You look into his eyes and smile sheepishly. “You’re cute, Gwilym Lee”, you put your hands around his neck. He raises his brows and grins back at you, his hands finding their way around your waist and they rest just above your ass.

“Oh, really?”

“Really”.

He looks at you for a while before speaking again. “Wanna meet my parents tomorrow?”

You nod eagerly. “Will Heather be there?”

Gwil rolls his eyes. “I won’t let my sister steal you from me”.

“Nothing can take me away from you, baby”, you peck his lips, “trust me”.

“Will you wear that dress?”

The look in his eyes is hopeful, he’s almost begging. You chuckle and press yourself even closer to him. “That dress means a lot to me, y’know. We met through it”.

“I remember something like that”.

You sigh and roll your eyes, being suddenly irritated with his remark. “Hope you don’t ruin it by the end of the night”.

Gwil’s eyes sparkle and he licks his lips. “Can’t promise you this, love”, he whispers before kissing you one more time.

________________________________________________________________

I would really love to see some feedback because I feel like this chapter is stupid and useless pls tell me what you think

“alio” taglist:  @majesticdiscodeaky @heartsarecompatible @all-my-friends-are-german @magicwithaknife @longing-hiraeth @thelondondreamer5 @roger-taylors-drumsticks @runningoutofwordstosay @chlobo6 @you-and-i-deserve-the-world @queenficarchive @murydedeus03 @alis-volat-propriiis @deacycomics @hollandspcter @gwils-bitch   @crazylittlethingcalleddub-step @painthatiusedto @kaylaylaylayla @rogerinastolemyheart @broken-pieces @chicagoblackhawkslover96 @leah-halliwell92 @brianandthemays @murydedeus03 @rogerfxckingtaylor  @zvzxs

[timeisacephalopod]

Ive seen endgame! Spoilers under the cut and I’m not tagging this as spoilers because I’m literally telling you now its spoilers.

1- what the fuck was the point of Tony’s kid? We had more than 10 years with this character, he doesn’t need a kid for emotional impact when he died and now I’m kind of pissed they threw this fucking random kid in there only to orphan the poor thing and make Pepper a single mother. What fucking bullshit. Never should have been a storyline.

2- Pepper in the suit yaaaaaas.

3- Wanda. Fucking loved her moments. And Thanos’ “I don’t even know who you are” was fucking iconic lmao. I mean her “you will” was okay but holy fucking damn that was the funniest shit from Thanos.

4- they killed viz permanently lmao yeah I didn’t give 2 tits and a snare drum about him anyway so I don’t care.

5- Steve. What the fucking fuck did they do to him? Don’t get me wrong, I like Peggy, and I liked him and Peggy in FA. They were cute. But it was a 4 month fling in the middle of of a war. Not that it can’t be important, but after 15+ years you are telling me a 4 month fling from Steve’s youth is more important to him than everything else? And what of Bucky? He leaves him to HYDRA and after all the shit he went through in WS and CW you’re seriously telling me he’d just LEAVE him there like that? I don’t mean to be a dick to Peggy because I do like her, but narratively speaking Bucky has always played more importance to her except when they want to make Steve feel nostalgic. I’m sorry, I’m fucking over that plot line.

More than that though she moved on in her show, she had a life after Steve and he went back and took that from her. And I don’t see why aside from no one let him grow as a character while also having him grow as a character. He went through a huge character shift in WS and then we saw nothing of it. Aside from his motivations in CW, which make sense given the context of WS however much I disagree, we see none of that development and I’m fucking tired of watching him lament over a relationship that lasted for a shorter time than a high school semester. To any normal person, and even to Steve given his non normal stance, he would have moved the fuck on. Also he made out with her niece that one time!! How is he living with this!

Also Sam says they never had a Captain America but Steve was still big when he danced with Peggy, which means he got the serum, which means he still can’t age right, which begs the question of how the tits long did he live? And again, what does this mean for everything else considering getting the serum implies he was, at some point, Cap even if he was never the Cap they knew. What the fuck! I’m actually the most mad about this because Steve, post WS, probably would have been one of my favorite characters given his extreme narrative shift and just how interesting that could have been if anyone ever fucking let him move on with his fucking self but no. Instead we end with him in the same spot he started in! I watched ten years of this shit for him to do NOTHING? All that development (that the narratives never really let him go through in totality because he narratively never shifted out of his War and Peggy Phase even while his character, on an individual level, moved out of that several times) and I watch him end in the same place he started?

Honestly I’m pretty pissed about that. Especially with all the did with Bucky. I seriously can’t believe Steve fucking left him there, ignored every piece of information he had, ruined Peggy’s original happy ending, and then didn’t even grow as a character. I like that he got a happy ending, I think he’s earned that, but I simply cannot believe a 4 month fucking fling meant so much he’d ignore his best friend, HYDRA, Peggy’s original marriage, the fact that he made out with her niece that one time, and everything else to end up exactly where he started. Which is why I don’t really care for him to begin with- because the narrative always leaves him right at the beginning and I don’t know how to invest in a character that grows but never grows. If he narratively was allowed to grow he would have been so. Much. Better. It is so fucking frustrating to me that he never moved the fuck on. You have no idea.

6- “I can do this all day” “Yeah I know”

7- “You look like melted ice cream”

8- Hated almost everything they did with Thor. Fat jokes? Yikes. Though I did love that ice cream line. Loved the bit with Frigga. And like. Thor being devastated and traumatized is ok. I think that’s realistic enough even if I wonder how someone that’s been alive for well over 1000 years doesn’t know how to handle himself with slightly more grace. I would have liked to see him crack differently.

9- Cap picking up Thor’s hammer and Thor being happy about it? 10 000 times better than the garbage Whedon wrote. Loved that.

10- Nebula. N E B U L A. NEEEEEBBBUUUUULLLLAAAA. Start to finish fucking loved her. She was amazing. 2 questions though- how did she not kill herself when she killed herself? Which in itself is a fucky question to ask. And also the second contention point I have with the movie beyond time travel bullshit is why NO ONE asked where she was post Nat (that in a minute). I know they were sad about Nat obviously but Rhodey is a full bird colonel, he keeps track of thousands of people for his job, plus all of his involvement in Tony’s antics, plus the Avengers and you’re telling me he didn’t notice her gone even with Nat? And Tony, you’re telling me he didn’t notice her gone? He was the one who bonded with her the most and he didn’t notice that he’s now technically lost two people he was close to? And Rocket? He didn’t notice? Are you fucking kidding me? I thought that was bullshit.

Even if, by chance, Rhodey somehow didn’t notice his partner in crime was missing (”I wasn't always like this” “Neither was I”- new BroTP yo!) when I think his military experience alone would have made him the second most likely to notice after Rocket (because he knows her the best) then Rocket should have. And if for some reason Rocket didn’t notice despite her being all that’s left of his found family, making him extra invested in her whereabouts, over Nat, whom I think he’d care about but not like Nebula, then Tony, who spent all that time with her in space, would have noticed.

Fucking someone would have noticed her gone. And the whole second half relies on no one noticing this moment and I call absolute bullshit on that. Someone. Would. Have. Noticed. Rhodey if for no other reason than experience of keeping track of people in war zones, Rocket if for no other reason than her being his last remaining connection to his family, and Tony if for no other reason than Nebula being a large part of the reason he’s alive. I was completely thrown from the story here. I simply can’t see how they could over look that even considering Natasha.

11- Natasha. Are you fucking kidding me? You killed her over Clint? I fucking hate MCU Clint. He’s boring, he’s nothing like the comics, he’s a fucking prick, and I don’t give a fuck about his family or anything to do with him. I liked him best when he was going to kill himself for Natasha. That is the only moment, as Marie Kondo would say, sparked joy for me. Otherwise throw the whole thing out. Fucking Natasha over Clint. Fuck you. That was an insult to the viewers. I don’t give a fuck about Clint, I don’t give a fuck about his kids aside from thinking they didn’t deserve the snap, and I don’t give a fuck about his story.

My mom said he was a plain Timbit (donut hole for the US readers) in a donut world and I honestly think that’s insulting to the plain Timbit, which is something we give to dogs as treats in Canada. Clint isn’t even a dog treat to me and they killed Black Widow over him. Fucking pissed.

12- “That suit does nothing for your ass” “No one was asking you to look, Tony!” “That’s America’s ass!” .... “That is America’s ass”

13- I actually really liked what they did with Bruce. I was excited to see all the benefits of the Hulk and Banner in one! That was pretty cool!

14- Strange’s reappearance was pretty badass. And Wong! I was excited to see him there! Was a bit surprised by Tilda Swinton’s appearance but okay. I didn’t hate it. Loved when she punched Bruce out of the Hulk lmfao that was so funny. I do like that she apparently does that to everyone lmao. I should write a fic where she punches Wong’s soul out of his body when the meet just because I think it’d be funny. And I’d love to see more Wong.

15- Steve vs Steve was really cool, I liked that. And fucking Hail HYDRA holy fucking shit I almost lost my ass. Couldn’t fucking believe he said that (and knowing that he just leaves that all for Peggy, his 4 month fling? Find this wildly out of character for him). Then he fucks right off with the tesseract omg.

16- Scott had some iconic one-liners. “That’s America’s ass!” “Okay I'm going to go inside you” omg. Ant Man was a joy to watch in this. I find Endgame used his character right.

17- I know I said it but Pepper Potts in the fucking suit y’all! I don’t know who was watching Morgan but also Pepper Potts in the fucking suit!!

18- That time travel shit made things entirely way too fucky. I knew that’s what they were going to do because that’s all that made sense, but I thought it was fucking stupid. And can Thanos even snap the stones out of existence? Because Tilda Swinton’s speech implied if he did something like that timelines would essentially do the funky chicken and die. She removed the time stone and shit was supposed to get weird, remove all 5 and what happens? Wtf? He fucking hid those stones. Did like Thor’s bit there though, killing Thanos. I think Nebula earned it more than him but I also think it was a good moment for Thor before his character became a fucking joke. 

19- narratively I understand why they started with Clint’s family dusting but I don’t give a fuck about Clint or his dusted family. I would have preferred watching a civilian lose his shit.

20- Steve you need therapy, stop leading therapy sessions. Especially when your advice is ‘move on’ and you literally go fucking nowhere in your life even after you went all over hell’s creations. Get this man a proper therapist he needs like 15!

21- lmfao Russos talking about gay representation and it was a guy talking about a date. I shit you the fuck not that was it. Gay. It was barely even there. Only straight men would ever assume that could possibly count as representation holy fuck. Like thanks for the blink you miss it shout out I guess. You remembered gays exist, wow!

22- Strange’s one finger thing, I liked that a lot actually. I think it functioned both as a great call to action and a nice reference to Stephen’s power.

23- Quick question, why was Tilda Swinton in New York? Because they went back too far for Strange- at first I when they mentioned 3 stones in NY I was like wait, when’s Strange’s story supposed to happen? After WS right? He can’t be in NY with the stone? But then Tilda showed up and I was like... why isn’t she in Nepal at the teaching sanctum? Because apparently the NY one isn’t a teaching sanctum and as far as I knew she was training Mordo and Wong there at this time so wtf? And it can’t be explained with ‘she knew she needed to be there’ because she punched Bruce out of hulk and he had to grovel to her to get the fucking thing from her and only managed because she knew Stephen gave up the stone willingly and would never do so without good reason because he’s the best fo the best. So like. Why was she there aside from plot convenience? That was a little too easy. Frankly, the whole plot was a touch too easy but still.

24- tired of aliens we’re supposed to relate to looking like humans but in pink while aliens we’re supposed to dislike are animalistic and non human looking. That’s a garbage trope.

25- The black woman in the elevator who made Tony and Steve is 100% Fury’s mother no one can convince me otherwise. I think the timeline matches up but I don’t care if it doesn’t she’s his mom now. He gets it all from his mama.

Bonus: stop trying to make Howard happen, Marvel, its not going to. I fucking hated that scene with Tony and Howard. What kind of bullshit abuse apology was that? Howard then, sure, he didn’t suck quite yet and seems to be aware of his own shortcomings. Howard in the future? Sorry, irredeemable crap. Narratively interesting irredeemable crap but irredeemable nonetheless. Tony panicking and saying his last name was Potts was great though lol. I’ll take it as evidence he took Pepper’s last name when they got married.

Bonus Bonus: I cried when Sam held the shield. I’ve been gunning for Sam to take over as Cap since we met him and everyone told me it’d be Bucky. I argued that we’ve already seen the story of a super soldier as Cap, it would be more interesting to watch Sam as a relatively normal guy take over as Cap. And I like Bucky traumatized and Winter Solider-y. I think he’s more interesting that way. Seriously though, Sam as Cap will be amazing and I didn’t expect to cry at that of all things but I did. I’m so excited to see him in that role!

Bonus Bonus Bonus for any sorry fucking soul who’s made it this far in I think I might update the Tony, T’Challa, and Their Gaggle of Children verse to include Morgan (but older) finding Tony only she’s his actual assed kid and no one believes it even though they have a striking resemblance. Which annoys them both because he got the media to buy all his other fake kids with easy to track down parents but not his actual kid. Ending with Nebula showing up and him claiming she’s his kid and everyone buying it.

[t0ngue-tech]

A Whirlwind Summer

“’You’re y/n, right? Jisoo’s friend.’ Taehyung asked nonchalantly.

‘Yeah, I am and you’re Taehyung.’ You replied, placing two dollar bills and a small cluster of coins on the palm of his hand.

‘That’s me.’”

↠highschoolAU(obviiii) fluff n’ angst, lots of dialogue if yall dont mind huhu↞

word count: 15k oh my god

↠oneshot↞

a/n: THE LAST TIME I UPLOADED WAS IN DECEMBER HOLY BALLS IM SORRY LOL. ive been writing this on and off for about two months and im so happy to have finally finished it. i hope you guise like it ^-^

Summer was supposed to be two months filled with late nights and lots of leisure reading. You had plans to finally finish a book series that you started at the beginning of the year and of course, you made sure to make time in your busy schedule to hang out with Jisoo.

It was two weeks into summer and you didn’t touch the series you planned to read because your mother thought it would be a good idea to come home from work one day with a bunch of applications for a summer job. You told her that you wanted to start working in college where you were allowed to work on campus and she didn’t mind at all, so when she handed you the stack of applications, you were confused.

“It’s only for the summer, sweetheart. And after this you have some work experience.” Was her reasoning and you knew you couldn’t say no.

After filling out the applications and going to a few interviews, you ultimately decided to work at a cozy ice cream parlour that was located across the park you frequented.

It was early evening which meant there weren’t as much people coming into the parlour. Jisoo was waiting with you to finish because she was going to sleepover at your house. You didn’t drive, so Jisoo was also your ticket home instead of you making the fifteen minute walk back to your house.

“Lighten up, y/n. Sure, your summer may have been ever-so-slightly ruined, but you get free ice cream, so who’s the real winner here?” Jisoo turned a page from her book and sipped on a rootbeer float you prepared for her.

“I have books I’d rather read.”

“But you’re getting paid now! And more money means more books!”

As much as you didn’t want to admit it, Jisoo was right. Instead of verbally admitting it, you took away her rootbeer float and with that, you two jokingly bickered over your slight stubbornness.

The familiar jingle from the entrance door rang and a boy you both knew walked in with three kids who seemed over-excited to be there.

The boy was Kim Taehyung and the only reason why you knew him was because Jisoo had mentioned him a few times and how his friends were always hanging out near the bleachers, blastic music through speakers during lunch and after school. You never spoke to him and you’ve never really gotten in close proximity with him until now. He mumbled something to the kids he was with and strided over the Jisoo who seemed less enthusiastic about the conversation. The kids ran up to the glass that shielded the ice cream flavours and they easily distracted you from focusing on whatever he was talking about with Jisoo.

“At least just think about it.” Taehyung slowly walked towards the register where you were punching in his total.

“Five dollars and thirty-two cents.” You squeezed into his one-sided conversation.

Quietly, he reached into his wallet and brought out the exact change, recounting the cents over and over just to make sure it was correct.

“Jisoo, just think about it and if not, I’ll just relay the message to him—thank you.” He gently plucked the receipt from your hand and gathered the kids who were happily eating their dessert.

“Fine.” Jisoo sighed, not looking up from her book. Taehyung breathed a quiet thank you to her and motioned the kids towards the door.

Before you could even ask, Jisoo answered your question for you.

“I swear, Seo Joon needs to run his errands himself instead of making Taehyung do it.” She slammed her book shut. “I already told him that I don’t want to get back together.”

“Didn’t you two break up like two months ago?” You asked.

“Yes! Since he thought it was a good idea to ‘fake break up’ with me as a dare or whatever, then he’s going to have to deal with the consequences.”

“Spicy.” You commented.

“Exactly. Now, another refill on that rootbeer float because god knows I need it.”

↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠

A new week, yet the same routine. You woke up that morning, did your usual morning rituals, and walked down to the ice cream parlour with an audiobook playing through your earphones.

Hours ticked on and families came and went, looking for a cold oasis in the heat. You were on the floor with your manager that afternoon and luckily you got along just fine with him.

An elderly woman who introduced herself as Mrs. Song was a regular at the parlour since she was a teenager. So, when she saw a new face, your face in particular, she was elated.

She came into the parlour with her caretaker every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday. They sat at the same seats near the counter and ate the same flavour every visit; mint chip for the caretaker and neapolitan for Mrs. Song.

Mrs. Song was a sweet old lady who easily forgets a lot of things. Whenever she saw you and Jisoo, she would always refer to you two as “sweetheart” or “deary”; you loved it whenever she called you that.

The parlour wasn’t as busy except for a few members from the city’s little league came in with their parents. Mrs. Song was reading through a newspaper and her caretaker had her nose inside of a book. You had just finished sweeping from behind the register when the bell of the entrance door rang when a familiar dark haired boy walked in with three younger kids who seemed high in spirits.

Taehyung was a stranger to you, so you weren’t looking for any sort of conversation with him. But you did have a feeling that he was probably going to ask you about Jisoo. The three kids sat on the remaining counter seats, waving sweetly at Mrs. Song who seemed excited to see them.

Taehyung approached the casing where the tubs of ice cream were and you were hoping your manager was going to take his order, but after a quick look around the room, he wasn’t present.

Good grief. You set aside the broom and glided towards the ice cream flavors.

“Hello, how can I help you?” The tone of your customer service voice disgusted you.

“Yeah uh, can I have three small cups of cookies and cream, chocolate, and rocky road.” Taehyung hummed as you reached for three cups. “What flavor do you recommend?”

You stared at the flavors for a moment before grabbing the ice cream scooper. “I personally like chestnut praline and brownie crunch.”

He nodded his head and chewed on the inside of his cheek, still indecisive on what flavor he wanted.

“Would you like a sample of both?” You asked.

“Hm, sure.”

You grabbed two plastic spoons and scooped up a tiny portion of each flavor for him to try and as he pondered his choices, you finished up the kids’ orders and set it in front of them.

“I’ll just take brownie crunch in the medium cup, please.” Taehyung spoke whilst throwing away the spoons in the nearby trash can.

As you were scooping the amount into the cup, you glanced at Taehyung who was pulling out a couple of bills out of his wallet. He looked over at the kids who were having a great time listening to Mrs. Song tell a story.

“That’ll be seven dollars and seventy-two cents.” You handed over the cup with a napkin wrapped around it.

Taehyung handed you two five dollar bills and took a bite of his ice cream.

“You’re y/n, right? Jisoo’s friend.” Taehyung asked nonchalantly.

“Yeah, I am and you’re Taehyung.” You replied, placing two dollar bills and a small cluster of coins on the palm of his hand.

“That’s me.” There was a brief moment of silence between you two as he lazily stuffed the change into his pocket. “Well, I’ll see you around. Let’s go guys.”

The three little boys waved goodbye to Mrs. Song and her caretaker. Her eyes lit up as she watched them leave the parlour. She then turned to you and said with a smile, “your boyfriend works well with kids, sweetheart.”

There was no point in telling her otherwise because she was probably not going to remember who Taehyung was the next time she was going to see him. So, you just smiled politely and wiped down the counter with a small towel.

↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠

Your day offs never seemed to recharge your battery to its fullest capacity, but it was enough for you to wind down with a book and an iced tea.

Although today wasn’t one of those days.

It was a warm and slow late afternoon. You were sitting on a stool behind the register, reading one of your books and drinking a milkshake your manager made for you. You were heavily invested in your book that you almost didn’t hear the door open.

To your surprise, Taehyung walked in with his head down and his shoulders dipped forward. As he walked closer to the counter, you noticed multiple splotches of dirt and grass all over his clothes. There was also a fresh gash the size of a golf ball on his knee.

“Holy shit, what happened to you?!” You snapped your book shut with your bookmarker almost sliding out. He was going to take a seat at one of the stools at the counter but you guided him to one of the tables so he has back support.

“My cousin had little league practice and a some of the kids’ chaperones and I decided to have a little game of our own.” Taehyung explained and slowly lifted his injured leg to rest on the second chair you pulled out for him. “I was going for home base and slid towards it as if my life depended on it—I mean, my team won, but at what cost?” He winced as he adjusted himself in the chair.

“Hold on, I’ll get a first aid kit.” You disappeared in the back room and quickly returned with a large white box.

Cleaning up cuts and scratches was a norm for you because of how much time you spent watching your little cousins at the park. It happened so often that it became it habit to carry band aids and alcohol pads in your bag.

“So, where’s your cousin?” You crouched beside him and rummaged through the box.

“He already had plans to play video games at his friend’s house after practice so he went there and I...ended up here.” Taehyung explained squeezing his eyes shut.

“And what brought you here?”

“Honestly, I don’t know. I was just walking and—ow! Fuck!” His entire leg flinched at the sudden contact of his gash and the alcohol pad touching.

“Shit, sorry! I should’ve warned you, I’m so sorry!” On instinct, you blew on his gash to cool down the stinging of the alcohol--something you did for your cousins.

“It’s uh, it’s okay, sorry. You can continue.” Taehyung tightly gripped the hem of his shirt and looked away to brace for impact, so with caution, you proceeded to clean his wound.

There were broken hisses coming from him and he squeezed his hand tighter and tighter until his knuckles ghosted white. You glanced up at him once in a while and pressed your lips together to keep yourself from smiling. This sight was a complete 180 from what you see at school; he walked around with confidence seeping from every pore and right now all confidence disappeared.

“I don’t think there’s any bandage that’s big enough for this.” You moved around some of the objects inside of the first aid kit. “I’ll just patch it up with some gauze okay?” Taehyung weakly nodded his head, still not looking at his knee. In less than five minutes, you had his knee all patched up and ready to go.

“There you go. Just don’t forget to remove the gauze and clean your cut later.” You stood up, trying to not fall over from being crouched over for so long.

Taehyung nodded and when you returned from the back room, he thanked you for coming to his aid. He limped over to where the ice cream was and pondered his choices before ultimately choosing chestnut praline in a medium sized cup.

“Did Jisoo mention anything about Seo Joon?” He asked.

You thought about a few days ago when Jisoo ranted about how she was over Seo Joon and that he wanted nothing to do with him, but you bit your tongue knowing this wasn’t any of your business.

“No, nothing new.” You handed Taehyung his ice cream over the casing.

“Well, if you don’t mind, could you tell her to lay down the line with Seo Joon please? I swear it feels like I talked to her way more than he did.”

You weren’t sure if Taehyung meant to say that outloud because this really wasn’t your business. He stabbed around his ice cream and hopped over to the counter seat. Ever since Jisoo mentioned it, you were curious yourself, so you took the chance to ask him.

“Why does he make you do it instead of doing it himself?”

Taehyung rubbed the back of his neck and you began to regret asking in the first place.

“I don’t...really know why. He asks me to do it and I just do it, I guess.” He simply stated. The tone of his voice sounded hesitant, but you decided not to dwell on it.

You hummed and made sure to receive Taehyung’s payment for the ice cream. You also hoped that this was going to be the last time you were going to have a conversation with him.

↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠

Of course, your hopes were shot down in one blow.

Two days after your encounter with Taehyung, you were working during a mild heatwave. The parlour was busier than normal, but thankfully it was nothing chaotic.

You had just served Mrs. Song her second cup of ice cream and your manager blended you a chocolate banana milkshake, telling you to take a break. The excitement in your eyes was hard to contain as you untied your apron and sat one seat away from Mrs. Song.

She was invested in putting together the same fifty piece puzzle she brought with her every other week, so you scrolled through your phone letting her be.

“Hey.” Taehyung’s voice came from out of nowhere, startling you. “You’re off today?”

“Hi.” You squeaked. “Just on break.”

He set his phone and wallet down in front of the seat next to you and took a five dollar bill as he walked to the register.

Not even five minutes passed and Taehyung slid onto the seat and stuffed his wallet with whatever change he had in his hand. Just at quick glance, you could already tell he ordered another cup of chestnut praline ice cream. Without saying another word, he took a bite out of his dessert and he mindlessly stared at the menu of other items that were sold at the parlour.

You took another quick peek at Taehyung who had the front of his hair tied messily into a short ponytail on the top of his head. The tank top he wore was slightly damp on the backside and his shoulder glistened whenever the sun or the ceiling lights hit it at a certain angle. The weather outside was scorching and you were grateful for being in a closed air-conditioned space.

The milkshake you were drinking was already halfway through and you didn’t even realize it. You were too focused on whether or not you should talk to Taehyung. It still felt awkward for you to start a conversation with him because, to put it simply, you really didn’t know how.

Conversations with Taehyung only happened by chance and out of pure convenience, but this time you weren’t behind the counter to serve him ice cream and he wasn’t writhing in pain from some sort of injury.

Duh, ask about his knee.

“How’s your knee?” You asked shly. Talking to him was also not necessary, but you felt compelled to do so.

He looked down which made your head automatically tilt downward; a layer of what looked to be fresh gauze was wrapped around his right knee.

“I have to limp around because of the gauze but other than that, it’s alright.” He twisted his leg to showcase his bandaged injury. “Thanks again, by the way. My mom thought nearly fainted when I got home.” Taehyung laughed as he said that which gave you leeway to laugh as well.

“Why?”

“She thought I got into a fight during my cousin’s practice especially because of all the dirt on my clothes.” Taehyung laughed with his entire body, almost falling over. “She look mortified. So we went out to buy gauze that night.”

“Your mom sounds like my mom. My mom tends to overreact even when it’s slightest injury.” You smiled to yourself.

“I know what you mean. They’re a bit dramatic, but they mean well.” Taehyung mixed around his ice cream. “It also doesn’t help the fact that I’m an only child, so I’m always getting the lecture ‘Taehyung, you’re my one and only baby blah blah blah.’”

The look on Taehyung’s face looked rather relaxed than annoyed as he said those words. It was a bit scary how you could relate because again, you two were polar opposites. Although, honestly, it was comforting in a way.

“I feel you.” You sighed. “But Jisoo is basically treated like family in my house, so I share those lectures with her.”

Taehyung left the plastic spoon in his mouth for a brief moment before speaking. “It must be great Jisoo has that relationship with your family.” He hung his head as scooped up a small portion of his ice cream.

“But you have Seo Joon, Minho, and the rest of your friends.”

“I--I don’t really invite them over.” He explained quietly and your eyes widened.

“Why not?”

Before Taehyung could answer you, your manager called your name to take over the register because of a conference call he had to take. You purse your lips together and apologized to Taehyung for cutting your conversation short. He waved it off with a smile and continued to feast on his dessert.

As you returned to the register to take an order for a family of five, you side-eyed Taehyung who was leaned towards his right, whispering and smiling with Mrs. Song. Unfortunately, you were too busy focusing on punching in numbers to focus on what they were saying and with Mrs. Song’s memory and imagination, their conversation could’ve been about anything.

↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠

Your next day off fell on the perfect day; the summer heat was bearable so you decided to get yourself a free refreshing milkshake from the ice cream parlour and read a book under a large tree at the park.

Music played through your earphones as you crossed the street with a chestnut praline milkshake in your hand. The summer dress you chose to wear was a peach color made up of a very light material to keep yourself cool; it was also your favorite clothing item.

The park wasn’t overly crowded which was perfect. There were some families having picnics, kids were running all over the playground, and there was a group of people off in the distance. Near the entrance was the most exquisite looking tree that provided the right amount of shade in all angles and you automatically gravitated towards it.

You packed a large blanket in your satchel and as well as a second blanket to cover your legs if you decided to lie down because even if you were wearing safety shorts, you knew better. The slightest breeze, a perfect tree, a milkshake, and a good book made up your day off and you couldn’t be any more happier.

After switching your position a thousand times, you decided to sit cross legged to keep your dress pinned down with your milkshake in between your thighs. You mindlessly played with the tassels that surrounded your blanket and continued to read your book.

The sudden drop of a heavy object next to you scared you out of your wits and the milkshake you secured almost spilt all over your blanket. Heart racing, you looked up to find Taehyung looking down at you with a boxy grin plastered on his face. A skateboard was the object that had dropped on the grass beside you and he then stripped himself of the flannel he was wearing to cover a spot on your blanket for himself to sit on.

“A warning would’ve been nice.” You sighed, placing a hand over your chest. “And you could have just sat on my blanket.”

Taehyung slid his shoes off to imitate your position and sit cross legged as well. “I’m probably covered in dirt. My cousin had practice down there and we decided to have another baseball match.” He moved his limbs around for you take a look at his skin. “No injuries, just dirt.”

“Good.” You smiled and tried to focus on your book, but Taehyung continued to distract you by ripping out the grass beside him. The one thing that didn’t sit right with you was how did Taehyung spot your from all the way on the other side of the park? And even if he was able to recognize you, why was he sitting with you?

“Is that book for school?” He asked, taking a peek at the cover.

“No, just for the joy of reading.” You closed the book realizing there was no way you could stay focused. “Is the little league still practicing?”

“They should be done right about now. The team is going to the community pool and my cousin is sleeping over a friend’s house after.” Taehyung explained. “I was about to leave and then I saw you sitting all the way over here--why are you all the way over here?”

You laughed and took a sip out of your milkshake. “It’s a nice tree to sit under, wouldn’t you agree?”

Taehyung stole the condensated cup out of your hand and proceeded to drag out a long sip of your drink making your jaw hang.

“Yeah, it’s a good spot.” He nonchalantly said before leaning back to lie down. “And that’s a really good drink. Since when could you turn chestnut praline into a milkshake?”

You clenched your fist to stop yourself striking his stomach. “It’s literally on the menu, Taehyung. ‘Turn your favorite flavor into a milkshake.’”

Not a single word was breathed out by Taehyung for about two minutes, which was odd. Maybe it was the right time to continue reading.

“You know,” Taehyung started.

Or maybe not.

“I don’t know why, but it sounded different when you said my name.”

“How?” You scrunch your eyebrows together because what he said made no sense. It was his name. Why would it sound any different? “Did you want me to call you something else?”

“No, no, y/n. ‘Taehyung’ is fine.”

Taehyung never mentioned anything else after that. He laid there with his eyes closed and you didn’t know when, but he fell asleep at some point. You glanced back and forth from your book to him just to check and make sure he was still sleeping. It was difficult to not be hung up over what he mentioned, but if he wasn’t going to expand more on his thoughts then maybe it wasn’t important.

You stayed at the park for almost an hour; you even finished your book. It was tempting to not wake up Taehyung because he looked too peaceful to disturb, but it had to be done. After shaking his leg a few times and quietly calling his name (you were now feeling self conscious about the way you said his name), Taehyung woke up in a hazy state.

Taehyung assisted you in folding up your blanket and before gesturing you to leave first, he said, “see you.”

No “see you tomorrow” or “see you next week” just a plain “see you.” When were you going to see him again? Who knows.

↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠

“Are you sure you don’t need a ride, y/n?” Jisoo handed you a paper bag and you handed her a rootbeer float in return.

You had thirty minutes till 9 pm which meant thirty more minutes till you could finally lock up and go home. Since you worked a long shift, Jisoo agreed to pick up a book from a bookstore that you preordered.

“Yes, Jisoo. It’s a nice night. It’s perfect for walking.” Jisoo blew her bangs upwards, obviously concerned about you walking home so late. “All of the late-night restaurants on this block are still open and I have my emergency whistle.”

You were stubborn, of course, Jisoo knew that first hand. So, she reached over the counter to squish your cheeks together. “Okay, fine. But you better text me when you get home!”

“I-prom-ise.” It was your turn to reach over and squish Jisoo’s cheeks.

“Okay. I have to go.” She released your face and held yours hands instead. “If anything happens—“

“Call you, yes, mom.” You gently pushed her away and laughed. “Just go, Jisoo.”

As Jisoo stepped backwards, she pointed towards her eyes and then towards yours indicating I’m watching you. But she meant that in the most endearing way possible. She was the sister you’ve always wanted, but god knows your mom wouldn’t know how to properly handle the both of you. So being friends was the best thing the world could offer.

Right before Jisoo’s entire body left the entrance, she was speaking to someone at the door and you could already tell who it was in your peripherals; none other than Taehyung. He waved at Jisoo then turned on his heel to greet you. You weakly waved at him because you were too distracted by Jisoo flailing her arms and giving you a thumbs up before fully skipping out the door.

“Hey.” Taehyung handed you a five dollar bill and at this point you didn’t need to ask him about his order. “Are you closing?”

“Yeah. My manager had to leave early because his babysitter couldn’t stay long today.” You handed him his chestnut praline ice cream in a medium cup. “What brings you here?”

He shrugged his shoulders and took a large bite of his ice cream. “It was a nice night, decided to go for a walk.”

“A walk?” You questioned. “To the ice cream parlour.”

“Not exactly. Just, you know, around. Then I saw Jisoo through the glass and then I saw you.”

His words were casual, but he was everything but. He stared at the menu, indenting crescent shaped marks into the peaks of his ice cream with his spoon. You were trying your hardest to not make the atmosphere weird between you two, but Taehyung was already way ahead of you.

Taehyung sat quietly at the counter as you wiped around the register until he offered to help you clean up the parlour after he scarfed down his ice cream. You protested, reminding him that you were the employee but he kept his hand out, waiting for some sort of cleaning instrument; it takes one to know one, so you knew he was going to be stubborn if you didn’t comply. You eventually handed him a broom and dustpan to sweep up dining area while you took care of the areas behind the register and back rooms.

Cleaning with Taehyung felt almost therapeutic because he turned played some piano jazz from his phone to keep a gentle ambience for cleaning. He cracked jokes here and there but majority of the time was spent tidying in comfort.

“I guess I have to pay you now for helping me.” You joked, getting ready to lock up.

“I’ll take half of my payment in the form of free ice cream tomorrow.” He said quickly.

“And the other half?”

Taehyung turned the open side around to read closed and pondered his options. “I get to walk you at least halfway to your house since it’s late and all.”

You had to admit, you were grateful that Taehyung offered to walk you only half way because you didn’t feel comfortable revealing your home to him just yet. You were also convinced that Jisoo probably put him up to it since they spoke a little at the door, but when you brought it up to Taehyung, he denied the assumption.

“Hm.” You bit the inside of your cheek. “Okay, but only halfway.”

Taehyung trotted down the sidewalk beside you with his arms gently swaying at his sides. All the street lights were all working properly and just as you told Jisoo, the restaurants and pubs along the walkways were also quite lively; this made the walk a little less awkward.

But talking won’t hurt either.

“Did Seo Joon talk to Jisoo yet? Because she hasn’t mentioned him lately.” You asked.

“I honestly don’t know. He hasn’t said anything about her either.” Taehyung kicked a rock off the curb. “In my opinion, I think he’s wasting his time.”

You threw your hands up in the air in relief. “Exactly! Jisoo and I say that all the time. We don’t know why he’s always making you guys constantly ask Jisoo to give him another chance when she said no many times.”

“Yeah. No means no.”

A cyclist with a headlight was approaching ahead of you and on instinct, Taehyung tugged you by the hand to make more room for the man to pass through. As he biked past, he quickly yelped out a thank you and sped off into the night.

“At least he had the decency to say thank you.” Taehyung whispered.

“Y-Yeah.” You tried to stifle the stutter in your voice as you wriggled your hand out of Taehyung’s.

He could have easily grabbed your forearm or even simply tell you to move to the side. Instead, he boldly took your hand into his and even held onto it for about five more seconds after the cyclist biked past.

For the rest of the way, you two remained silent only increasing the awkward tension. Even after thanking him and saying bye, you couldn’t stop think about holding his hand. It was annoying because you had no reason to be thinking about it this hard. It annoyed you so much to the point you called Jisoo as soon as you got him because god, you felt like you were going crazy.

“I can’t say I’m that surprised, y/n. When I asked what he was doing at the parlour he said he wanted to see you.”

You quickly sat up on your bed and practically yelled, “really?! But why?!”

“Who knows and I don’t mean to offend you in any way, I promise but, isn’t that kind of weird?”

“No, I know what you mean.” You scratched your head and fell back against your pillows. You obviously didn’t know Taehyung as long as Jisoo had, but you never saw him flirt much with other or even just hang around with other people besides his crew.

“If he’s trying to flirt with you, he’s doing a bad job.”

“Jisoo!”

Jisoo laughed in your ear. “I’m kidding, y/n. But honestly, Taehyung is nothing like Seo Joon’s dumbass, but just be careful.”

↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠

Maybe talking to Jisoo was a bad idea. The whole day at work you couldn’t stop thinking about holding hands with Taehyung and hearing her words be careful. She was just being protective of course and you weren’t going to stand there and lie to yourself and say that Taehyung isn’t a good guy. You only thought that way in the beginning because he hung around Seo Joon, but so far, Taehyung has been nothing but nice to you. But Jisoo was right, you had to be careful.

You drummed your fingers against the countertop. There had been multiple moments where you zoned out because of your own thinking. It had to stop.

“Hi, y/n.”

But how could it stop when you owed Taehyung free ice cream.

“Hey, Taehyung. Your ice cream is ready and waiting.”

He sat patiently at the counter and you caught him smiling at you while scooping the ice cream into a cup.

“Are you closing again today?”

You looked at the clock behind you.

2:32 PM

“No, I opened, so I’m getting off at five.”

Taehyung mouthed the word five and took a large bite out of his ice cream. He sat in silence while you cared for other customers that came in. He even smiled and waved at one of the toddlers who shyly hid behind her father’s leg. Taehyung cooed for her to give him a high five and after making some embarrassing faces, she emerged from her hideout and skipped over to give Taehyung a high five.

You couldn’t help but smile. Taehyung outside of school was a whole new person. He seemed more independent and gentle rather than the rowdy demeanor he gives off at school.

Why was someone like Taehyung hanging around a jerk like Seo Joon? Seo Joon had an inflated ego and believed he could have anything he wanted. Taehyung, on the other hand, was the complete opposite--although, you couldn’t say much because you never spent a significant amount of time with him.

God, y/n. It’s sounding like you want to spend more time with him.

“Are you busy after work, y/n?” Taehyung wiped his mouth with a napkin and inched closer to the register.

You gave it some thought. “No…? No, I don’t think I am. Why?”

“Well…” He started off quietly. “The little league is having a late practice and I was wondering if you wanted to come by and watch.”

Just when you were thinking about spending time with Taehyung, the universe read your mind. It was a very tempting offer and this would give you a chance to get to know him better--in a friendly way of course. So, you happily accepted and he gave you instructions to where he would be at the park for you to find him.

“I’ll see you later then, y/n.” Taehyung discarded his trash and stuffed his hands in his pockets.

“Yeah.” You breathed. “Bye Taehyung.”

As Taehyung started to walk out the door, he looked back to wave and the smile he wore looked genuine, making you smile unknowingly.

↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠

The next few hours flew by in a blink of an eye. One second you were refilling the sugar cone stack and next you were walking out of the parlour with two chestnut praline milkshakes in each hand. The milkshakes were a last minute idea, plus a ziploc bag of snacks in your satchel.

The dim rays of the sun hit your skin, but it wasn’t as hot as noon time. You passed through area of the park where most families were stationed--near the playground and bathrooms. Just beyond that was an open area where you spotted the dugout and playing field.

The closer you got, the sight of children running around with their baseball gloves and their parents watching from the side. You walked around the large diamond, past the dugout and found Taehyung sitting cross legged on the lush grass. He was cheering on the team and in the midst of that, your presence caught his attention.

“Y/n! Hey!” He called out with a boxy grin.

“Hi.” You waddled over and handed him his milkshake before sitting beside him.

“Thank you, but you really didn’t need to.” Even if he said that, he excitedly took a long sip out of his refreshment.

“It’s still warm out so I thought this would help while we watch--oh! I also packed some cookies.” You pulled out one of the ziplocs filled with a mixture of oreos, chocolate chip, and shortbread cookies. “We crush them for toppings.”

Taehyung smiled gratefully and proceeded to pull out an oreo. He then pointed out his cousin and explained their current game plan. You had little to no knowledge about baseball and Taehyung patiently answered your questions to the best of his abilities.

“Wow. So did you play baseball too?” You asked.

“No. I actually didn’t play much sports. I just learned from my cousin’s dad because he coached a little league team on the side before his firm skyrocketed.” Taehyung told you stories about his childhood and how he was intrigued with baseball despite never being on a team. He laughed while telling you that the reason why he never joined his uncle’s little league team was because his mom didn’t want him to get hurt.

“And apparently she still carried on the same ethic as you went onto high school.” You joked.

“Yeah, yeah she did.” Taehyung let out a deep chuckle. “How about you? Any sports?”

You scrunch your nose and shook your head. “I was, and still am, a bookworm.”

The parents and other spectators began to cheer and on an instinct, you and Taehyung did the same even if you two had no idea what was going on with the game. After the cheering died down, Taehyung smoothly continued the conversation.

“What kind of books do you like to read?”

“I like young adult fiction and psychological thrillers.” You answered shyly.

Taehyung raised his eyebrows and popped a shortbread cookie into his mouth. “I would have never guessed that you liked to read psychological thrillers.”

“Do I look that much of a goody two shoes?”

“N-No, of course not. It’s just that...uh…” He rubbed the back of his neck, trying to fish for words that wouldn’t offend you.

“I’m kidding, Taehyung.” You snickered. “I know I don’t look like it, I own a lot of psychological thriller books. It’s unbelievably captivating. ”

“Well, maybe you could recommend a book for me. I don’t read much and you seem to know what’s good.”

Naturally, your eyes lit up. Jisoo didn’t prefer psychological thrillers because she got nightmares easily and your other friends weren’t as much as a bookworm as you were. “Yeah, of course. I’d probably have to look through my selection to find something that’s not too scarring for you to start with.”

Taehyung settled his his milkshake in between his legs and fiddled with his fingers. He stared up into the cotton candy sky for a brief moment. “Maybe we could, I don’t know, exchange numbers so you could let me know when you found a book?”

You weren’t going to sit there and lie to yourself and say that his request didn’t make your heart skip a beat. Things weren’t being rushed, right? It was just his phone number. It’s not like he was asking you out on a date on the spot.

“Sure, yeah.” You gave him your number and within seconds, you received a text that contained a string of book emojis. “I guess I’ll start looking through my bookcase when I get home later.”

↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠

After that early evening at the park, you and Taehyung texted almost everyday. He still came by to visit you at the ice cream parlour. Most days he came with his cousin and his cousin’s friends and other days, he came by on his own. Whenever he visited when you worked the closing shift, he always walked you halfway home; it sort of became a ritual.

This type of connection with a boy didn’t always come by, so it was something you gladly and cautiously shared with Jisoo. You expected her to be hesitant about the whole thing, but she was completely on board the ship. She was still reminding you to keep yourself guarded, but she promised to be supportive no matter what was going to happen between you and Taehyung.

You lended Taehyung three of your books since then and after he completed a book, he would rant to you about the plot, certain characters he disliked, and he even told you that he was a slightly paranoid for two nights; you did warn him about that.

The air was oddly cooler that evening which made it a pleasant walk home. Your dad was picking out a bottle of wine out of the mini fridge in the dining while you were splayed lazily on your sofa, returning texts from Jisoo, Taehyung, and your dad--as a joke.

“How was work, sweetheart?” He asked.

“Kind of slow, but I got to try out some flavours that the parlour is going sell during the fall.” You flipped over onto your side and scanned his bottle choice. “Why don’t you go with chardonnay? It’s mom’s favorite and she’s been working long hours this whole week?”

Your dad stared at the bottle of cabernet and nodded his head. “You know, your knowledge about wine is concerning.”

“You and mom are wine drinkers, of course I would know.” You laughed.

Jokes were exchanged between you and your dad while the smell of garlic and basil floated throughout the room. You were having a great time teasing your dad that you almost didn’t noticed your phone vibrating on the sofa.

“Hello?”

“Hey, y/n. Sorry, are you busy?”

“No, no, Taehyung.  I’m just at home. What’s up?”

Taehyung never called you, so this was a curveball.

“I’m actually going to sleepover my cousin’s house tonight and tomorrow, so I wanted to return your book and borrow the next one before I head over there; just so I can have something to do to pass the time while I’m there.”

“I--uh,” You glanced at your father who was mixing what looked to be like a pasta salad. “Yeah, you can stop by. I’ll text you my address and just let me know when you’re here.”

This would be the first time Taehyung would be anywhere near your house. He always walked you halfway, never two-thirds or three-fourths of the way. You were nervous, probably for no reason since he was only dropping off a book.

Ten minutes, you received a here text that was accompanied by a smiley emoji. You already informed your dad, so you skipped outside to find Taehyung standing awkwardly next to your mailbox.

“Hey, did you walk all the way here?”

“Nah, skateboard.” Taehyung moved to the side the reveal his skateboard that was planted on the patch of grass surrounding your mailbox. “Here you go.”

Taehyung handed you the novel in exchange for the next book.

“So, how’d you like it?”

Taehyung blew out a breath and shook his head. “That...was quite the read. I wasn’t expecting her to be the cult leader’s daughter like what?!” He expressed his shock by flinging his hands out in front of him. “And that chase? I was clenching my ass cheeks reading that part.”

You laughed, recalling how your entire body seized up reading that exact same scene. “Yeah, I know exactly how you feel. I finished this novel in one day.”

“Damn.” He breathed. “How about this one--The Dead House? How is it?”

“I guess you’re going to have to read it to find out yourself.” You smiled slyly at him and he scoffed with a similar smile.

The sound of a car pulling in caught both of your attentions. Your mother waved at you through the windshield and exited the car. On the inside, you were desperately praying hard for your mom to not embarrass you in any way.

“Hi honey.” She slipped a swift kiss to your cheek and stuck her hand out towards Taehyung. “And you must be Taehyung. Y/n tells me that she’s been recommending you books.”

Taehyung nervously wiped his hand at the bottom of his shirt before making contact with your mother’s. “Y-Yes, ma’am. That’s me, I’m that Taehyung.”

Your mom smiled sweetly at him and then turned to face you. “Well honey, why don’t we have Taehyung for dinner? Unless you have somewhere else to be.”

Your jaw hung open and you exchanged glances between your mom and Taehyung. You shrugged your shoulders and nodded your head towards him. “Are you busy?”

He also shared anxious glances towards you and your mom before answering. “No, n-no. I’d love to stay for dinner.”

Anxiety built up as you watched Taehyung shake hands with your dad. They knew he wasn’t your boyfriend, but the only reason they were this excited was because you haven’t had a single guy come over for dinner since your freshman year. There were fifteen minutes left on the oven, so your mom, being as sweet as she was, instructed you to show Taehyung your bookcases.

“Wow.”

Taehyung scanned the walls of your room that were splattered with a pale yellow and white paint that were designed in vertical stripes. The floors of your room were a mahogany wood that was consistent with your entire house and in the middle of your room was a pearl white coffee table sitting on top of a large dark gray circular rug.  There were two bean bag chairs surrounding the table and small stack of magazines on top.

Beside your desk in the corner of your room were two large off-white bookcases; it looked as if you were almost in desperate need of a third one. He tiptoed over and gently ran his finger over a couple of the spines of a row of books.

“I never pictured your room to be like this.” Taehyung commented.

“And how did you picture it?” You sunk down onto one of the bean bag chairs and he followed in suit.

He shrugged his shoulders. “Bigger? And maybe...light purple?”

You threw your head back and laughed. “I like things comfy and cozy. When we first moved here, my parents wanted me to take the office room down the hall, but apparently I threw a tantrum because this was the room I wanted.��

“You threw a tantrum? Now that is something I have to witness.”

“No, no it’s not.”

For the next fifteen minutes, you answered Taehyung’s questions about your room and even shared stories from your childhood when you first moved in. He learned that you’ve lived in this house your entire life, but only started attending your current high school at the beginning of freshman year because your dad switched office locations.

“Do you miss your old friends?” He asked quietly.

“I do, but I mean, we still talk frequently so it’s not as bad as I thought it was going to be.” You explained. “And plus, I’ve made amazing friends at our school.”

Taehyung flashed you the shyest smile before hiding it behind the back of his hand. Your statement was meant for your girlfriends, but Taehyung was silently woven into it too. You had to admit, he was a great friend. Ever since you started texting him almost everyday, talking to him was so much easier; conversations weren’t forced anymore and you breathed fine around him.

Your dad called you two from the door and apologized for not asking Taehyung if he was vegetarian at the beginning. Of course, you knew he wasn’t.

The menu was baked chicken with rice and mixed vegetables. There was also a bowl of pasta salad which Taehyung become quite fond of; your dad ended up packing a small serving of the pasta to take home with him. To add on the constant generous gestures, he even offered to drive Taehyung home since the sun had gone down, but Taehyung politely declined, stating that his home was just a ten minute skateboard ride away.

“Your parents are great.” Taehyung walked down the driveway after shaking your parents’ hands and thanking them for dinner.

“They’re just being that way because you’re here.” You giggled and handed him the styrofoam bowl of pasta you held for him.

Taehyung sighed into the night sky and ruffled his hair. “Tonight was one of the best nights I had in awhile. Thanks again for having me.”

“It’s no problem at all. I’m glad you had a nice time.”

He placed his skateboard on the sidewalk and took a step forward towards you. He extended his arms outward and enveloped you in a hug which caught you completely off guard. Although, the slightest hesitation, you wrapped your arms around his torso and heard his deep laughter vibrate near your ear.

“I’ll see you later then.” Taehyung whispered, slowly letting you go.

↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠

It was difficult for you to function for the next few days all because Taehyung gave you a hug. This wasn’t fair. How were you supposed to focus on your books and your job if you were so preoccupied with a measly hug.

Jisoo was ecstatic about the idea. She teased you about it because it had been way too long since you’ve been worked up over a guy. You almost didn’t tell her because you knew how she would react, but Jisoo was your best friend so you had to tell her.

The parlour was just starting to die down and you were listening to Mrs. Song passionately talk about her late husband and how he always brought home at least one kind of flower whenever he came home from work. Her caretaker probably heard these stories over a hundred times, but she listened and smiled as if it were her first time hearing it.

“He sounds like a great man, Mrs. Song.” You said with the brightest smile.

“Oh, deary! He was an amazing man. Find yourself a gentleman who is never afraid to show you off and show how much he cares for you.” As Mrs. Song said that, she reached over to grasp onto your hands.

“Of course, ma’am. I will.” You squeezed tightly onto her frail hands and felt your chest cave it. Meeting Mrs. Song was one of the greatest things to ever happen in your life.

Mrs. Song’s caretaker tidied up the ice cream cups and newspaper that she brought which indicated that it was time for them to head back home. They both waved you goodbye and Mrs. Song took small steps with her walker towards the door.

Just on time, you spotted Taehyung through the glass and he rushed to the entrance door to open the door for Mrs. Song. She held onto Taehyung’s hand and they exchanged a few words which were too hushed to hear from where you were. But as they were departing, Taehyung caught you staring and shot you a smile before you shyly turned away.

“You know,” Taehyung began. “Staring is rude.”

You let out a sarcastic laugh and provided him with his usual order. “Yeah, yeah.”

“Oh, can I order tubs of ice cream in advance?” Taehyung asked.

“Uh, yeah. But only in these flavours.” You rummaged through some papers that were stashed inside a compartment.

He plucked the paper out of your hands and read through the list. “I’ll take a gallon of rocky road, neapolitan, and--sucks there’s no chestnut praline.” You both chuckled and Taehyung continued to stare at the list. “And a gallon of vanilla.”

You punched in numbers into the register and Taehyung already had his card out waiting to pay.

“Having a party?” You questioned and ripped out the receipt. “Just bring this receipt whenever you come in to grab the ice cream.”

“The little league is having a celebration on Thursday because gameday is on Wednesday and the coach said win or lose, they’re going to celebrate no matter what.” He folded up the receipt and slipped it into his wallet. “My cousin begged me to order ice cream from here.”

If the two of you didn’t start texting, maybe you two wouldn’t be making jokes and having easy conversations at the moment. Taehyung had such a lovely personality hidden beneath his bad boy persona and it bothered you that he didn’t act this way in school. Would Seo Joon not want to be his friend anymore? Because that’s what high school was--a hotspot for teenagers to do whatever they could to fit in and find friends. Thankfully Jisoo’s eldest sister gave the two of you a talk about being never turning yourself into someone you’re not just to make people like you.

If only Taehyung got the same talk.

“Hey, the summer night festival is next week friday, are you going?” He asked you softly.

The summer night festival was a one night community shindig that was held the last friday before all the kids went back to school on the Monday of the following week. It had been a tradition for as long as you could remember and your family never missed the event.

“I totally forgot about that, but yeah I am. I go every year with my parents.”

Taehyung nodded his head and fidgeted with his hands. “Well, if your parents don’t mind, could I steal you at some point during the festival?”

Like a date?

The words in your head made you stop breathing for a few seconds and you were hoping your cheeks weren’t reflecting how hot they were feeling.

“I--uh--” Taehyung chuckled at the flustered look you had on your face. “Yeah. I’m pretty sure they won’t mind you stealing me, but they would probably mind if you didn’t say hello.”

“I promise I’ll say hi to your parents.” Taehyung stood up and tucked his hair back underneath his hat. “I’ll see you then.”

Out of nowhere, Taehyung slid his hand against the counter and curled his fingers around your own. He gave you a light squeeze and proceeded to walk out of the parlour.

You tried your hardest to suppress your smile at the simple touch of his fingers. It wasn’t just the touch of his fingers that sparked your smile. It could easily be a text message, seeing him enter the ice cream parlour, or sharing eye contact with you. He made you laugh easily with stories he tells and even his laugh alone was contagious. You had difficulty in controlling the butterflies inside of you every time you saw him, but granted, you were doing a fairly good job at doing so.

It was terrifying and as much as you didn’t want to admit it, you liked Taehyung. You really did.

↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠

“Thanks for bringing me along, mom and dad. I wish my parents didn’t have to finish late tonight.” Jisoo had her arm linked around yours as the four of you trotted down the pavement into the town.

“Of course, sweetheart. Just don’t forget to bring your dad some of the grilled corn this time.” Your father reached out to gently tug on a lock of Jisoo’s hair.

You had already told Jisoo about meeting with Taehyung so she wouldn’t think you’re going to ditch her out of nowhere. She, without a doubt, understood and made you promise to call her if anything went wrong. You were expecting that kind of response. It was Jisoo.

The festival had already begun. Children were walking around with their parents holding sticks of cotton candy and a balloon animal in the other. Teenagers were swarming around some of the games to win large stuffed animals for their significant others and there was also a dunking booth that the teachers from the different high school were running. The intoxicating smell of food filled the air and you could already taste the chocolate funnel cake in your mouth. After promising your parents that you would link up with them soon, Jisoo dragged you to the deep fried twinkies booth.

For the next two hours, time was spent with Jisoo eating and trying to not spend a lot of money on games you had zero skills in. Jisoo walked back to the bench you two were sitting on with two cups of iced sweet tea.

“Did Taehyung call you yet?” She asked excitedly.

“Not yet--why are you so excited about this?” You laughed and snatched your drink away from her.

“Because this is exciting! You don’t agree? But anyway, he’s probably not even here yet. I saw Seo Joon and his boys when I was in line, but I didn’t see Taehyung with them.”

On an impulse, a sigh escaped your mouth. Thankfully, Taehyung didn’t stand you up or at least you hope he didn’t.

“Did Seo Joon see you?” You asked.

“No, thank you god. I haven’t heard from him in a while so I guess I owe Taehyung one--speaking of the devil.” Jisoo pointed towards your phone that had Taehyung’s name displayed across the screen. She nudged you to answer and you hated how nervous you were feeling.

“H-Hello?”

“Hey, y/n. Sorry, I couldn’t leave my house until my dad got home. Where are you?”

You looked around the crowd to see if you could find him before he found you. “I’m sitting with Jisoo near the sweet tea and peach cobbler booths. I’m wearing a red shirt.”

“Red shirt...peach cobbler… I can’t see--oh, there!”

You whipped your head around and Jisoo did the same. Taehyung flailed around in his white graphic t-shirt and scurried along with sidewalk with his phone still pressed to his ear.

“Hi, hey, Jisoo.” Taehyung greeted while taking deep breaths.

“Hi, Taehyung.” Jisoo returned the greeting and stood up. “Before I go and link up with your parents y/n--thanks Tae for whatever you did to get Seo Joon off my back. It has made my summer a lot more relaxing.”

Taehyung cocked his head and smiled. “I, uh, I don’t really know what I did either, but you’re welcome. Maybe he just got tired of chasing? But whatever happened, it’s good to know that he’s out of your hair.”

They exchanged a few more words and you smiled at the both of them. It was comforting to know that Jisoo was able to get along with Taehyung at the moment. You remembered when you first encountered Taehyung in close proximity, Jisoo was barely communicating with Taehyung and when she did speak to him, she spoke to him in a cold manner. Now, Jisoo was laughing and making direct eye contact with the same guy.

“Geez, y/n.” Jisoo squished your cheeks together. “If I have something on my face, just say it.”

“You seriously have a bad habit in staring.” Taehyung added in.

“She does, doesn’t she?”

“Okay, okay. Don’t gang up on me.” You playfully swatted Jisoo’s hands away and jabbed a finger at each of their legs. “But, we’ll accompany you to wherever my parents are. Taehyung is going to say hi to them.”

After a few calls, your mom finally picked up and directed you three to some sort of game booth where your dad was struggling to win at least one game. Your parents exchanged greetings as soon as your dad landed a win. They briefly spoke, asking if Taehyung’s parents were around the festival too and if he had eaten.

“My parents weren’t able to come tonight and not yet, sir. I was going to buy something for y/n and I.” Taehyung was obviously still nervous around your parents, especially your dad, but it was only natural.

“Well, you two have fun. I’ll call you if we decide to leave early and don’t forget that Jisoo is here too.” Your mom squeezed Taehyung’s shoulder and Jisoo pushed you to stand next to him.

“Okay mom and yes, I won’t forget about Jisoo.” You waved goodbye with a rapid beating heart. This wasn’t your first time spending alone time with Taehyung, but this was the first time you were going to be alone with him knowing that you admitted to yourself that you like him.

Everything was going to be fine as long as you acted normal around him. This meant no stuttering and no over-selling your normality. But could you really pull this off?

“You alright?” Taehyung poked your side, making you flinch.

“Y-Yeah. I’m all good.” You answered fairly quickly.

Of course, you couldn’t pull this off.

“By the way, are you sure you just want breadsticks? The pizza here is top notch.” Taehyung swept your behavior under the rug which you were grateful for.

“Yeah, Jisoo and I ate a little too much desserts. I swear that girl can eat desserts for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.”

Taehyung stepped to side to swiftly retrieve his order and you were able to catch a whiff of his cologne or body wash or something; it was an earthy citrusy scent that tickled your nose. After returning to you, he helped guide you through the crowd with a careful hand on your lower back making sure not to lose amongst the sea of people.

“If only the ice cream parlour was open. I could go for a milkshake.” He commented.

“Yeah, we closed early because of the festival, sorry.” You looked around the area. “They have rainbow lemonade? That sounds interesting, I mean, it’s no milkshake but still.”

You offered to make the purchase for the both of you but Taehyung constantly pushed you to let him pay for the drinks. Ultimately, he took the win for that.

The festival was still at its peak, so there were still large amounts of crowds which made it difficult to canvass the nearby spots for a bench. The park lights were still on, so Taehyung made the executive decision to park yourselves there to eat. It wasn’t as hot as most nights which made sitting at one of the picnic tables under a lampost more enjoyable.

The garlic and basil breadsticks Taehyung ordered for you were scrumptious and he even let you have the first bite of his pizza  to show you what you were missing out on. He told you about how he meant to be at the festival earlier, but his mom was still at work and his dad wanted him to wait for him so someone could be at home to watch their dog.

“Aw, you have a dog?” Your eyes lit up and you clasped your hands together.

“Yeah, our neighbor’s dog gave birth recently so he’s still a puppy.” Taehyung showed you his lock screen to present an adorable ball of fluff with the largest grin on its face. “His name is Yeontan.”

You squealed and stole his phone out of his hands. “He is the cutest! I’d give him the world if I could.”

“I wanted to bring him out for you to meet him, but we have yet to finish up his shots.” He explained, smiling at you.

“Maybe next time?”

“Yeah. Of course.” He took his phone back and stared at his lockscreen for a few seconds. “Or you could come over some time? Just so Tannie doesn’t have to leave my house.”

“I’d…” You started. “I’d love that.”

Going over to Taehyung’s house would mean that there was a chance you would meet his parents. It made you wonder if Taehyung talked about you just like how you talked about him around your family. You thought you were a genuinely good person and you haven’t done anything to hurt Taehyung at some point for him to say anything that could tarnish his parent’s first impression about you.

It wouldn’t hurt to ask, right?

“By any chance, does your parents know about me?” You cautiously asked.

Taehyung smiled bashfully and nodded his head. “My mom was pleased to know that you’re a reader and you were the one who helped me get patched up that one time. Thanks again, y/n.”

“It’s no problem. I’m pretty sure your mom would’ve had a meltdown if you went home without any bandages whatsoever.” You laughed, thinking about the times Taehyung would shake his head yet speak about his mom endearingly.

“That’s definitely true.” He agreed. “My parents are dying to meet you though, so maybe on your next day off or when you finish early, you could stop by.”

“It’s a date.”

Both of your eyes widened and you choked on your saliva realizing there was no way you could save yourself from that one. The words came out automatically and you were already used to saying it towards Jisoo and your other girlfriends, but with your feelings towards Taehyung, this time was different. You couldn’t help but think that you screwed everything up at that moment because you couldn’t distinguish the look Taehyung had on his face. You couldn’t tell if he was embarrassed or disgusted.

“Y-Yeah,” Taehyung mumbled, trying to hide his face behind his hand. “It’s--It’s a date.”

It felt as if your heart was about to beat right out of your chest. You tried to justify everything by telling yourself that he was jokingly agreeing with you, but on the inside, you were praying that he meant it the same way you did.

A brief moment of awkward silence washed on shore and it almost sealed the deal in making you think that you really did screw up big time. Taehyung cut the silence in half by clearing his throat and then scooting closer to you.

“You know, y/n,” Taehyung gulped loudly and planted his elbow on top of the table, resting his cheek on his palm to look at you. “I never imagined myself spending the summer reading and constantly visiting the ice cream parlour.”

“I never expected to be working at all this summer. My mom was the mastermind behind my employment.” You chuckled and rolled your eyes.

“Well, I’m glad she encouraged you to work.” Taehyung held his gaze with you. “I got to meet you.”

How could Taehyung look at you the way he was at the moment and say I got to meet you. Your face was probably beet red and you couldn’t control your smile at that point. There was a lot you wanted to say to him like I love hanging out with you and something corny like we should go thank my mom then. But you stared at him, with your words stuck in your throat and a stupid smile plastered on your face.

“I spent a lot of money on ice cream, but it was worth it.” Taehyung continued with his words, making your heart rate spiral out of control.

“You’ve become a loyal customer.” You joked, making a deep sound of laughter bubble from his throat.

“Yeah, yeah I have.” He said in between laughs. “You’re to blame though.”

“I haven’t done anything.”

“No , no, you did a lot, y/n. Trust me.”

“And what exactly have I done, Taehyung?” You asked with a mischievous tone of voice.

Taehyung moved a couple of inches closer to you and you remained still. “First of all, you patched up my wounds. You introduced me to a new flavour of ice cream, you let me borrow your books which blossomed a new interest of mine.” You listened intently as Taehyung’s eyes grew softer. “You made me smile and laugh until my stomach hurt. You also understood my weird family dynamics. I feel less lonely and a lot happier nowadays and you’re to blame, y/n.”

Each word that fell from Taehyung’s lips turned you closer and closer into mush. You were denying the obvious which was mutual feelings because your worlds were similar yet different. There was no way someone like Taehyung could ever feel an ounce of anything towards you. This was usual assumption until you got to know him personally and see what kind of boy he really was. However, naturally, you were still in denial.

“You do know what I’m saying, right?” Taehyung asked and you just slightly parted your lips, scared to say what your heart was pushing you to say. “I’m saying… I like you, y/n. I really like you.”

The oxygen inside of you became trapped inside of your chest. Out of all the things Taehyung could have said, you would would choose for him to say those words again and again. Your hands felt clammy and the rapid sound of your heartbeat was deafening in your ears.

“I just ruined things, didn’t I?” Taehyung snapped you back into reality and you noticed that he scooted a few inches away from you.

You frantically shook your head thinking that your silence ruined things. “No, Taehyung. S-Sorry, I’m just surprised that’s all.”

He nodded and blew out a shaky breath. Judging by the look on his face, Taehyung seemed as nervous as you were and you knew what you had to do to ease the tension.

“I...like you too, Taehyung.” You replied softly.

Taehyung raised his eyebrows. He then poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue, exerting a breath of air. “R-Really? Are you sure?”

You laughed and lightly shoved his shoulder. “Yes, I’m sure you dummy. I’m awkward around a lot of people, especially boys, but not with you.” It was Taehyung’s turn to listen with his undivided attention. “I’ve been thinking a lot about you lately a-and you don’t even know how excited I get when I see you walk through the doors of the parlour or when you text me. My parents like you, it seems like Jisoo is becoming quite fond of you, and it’s so scary because  I don’t even think I’m your type so I hope you understand why I’m so shocked. I’m too quiet, I talk to myself sometimes--”

“Y/n.” Taehyung blurted your name out with a chuckle. “Just breathe for a second, okay? I don’t have a type. I don’t care if you talk to yourself or if you think you’re too quiet or whatever else you were going to say. I like you and that’s that.”

Taehyung cautiously cupped the back of your hand with his and looked at you as if you painted the stars in the sky with your own two hands. It was an odd feeling to have him look at you the way he did and yet, it was a reassuring feeling to know that he felt the same as you did.

The stars you apparently painted with your own hands were aligned perfectly. You twisted your hand around to have his palm up against yours until he eventually laced his fingers in between yours. Taehyung giggled softly as he gently caressed the back of your hand with his thumb.

Out of all the events that happened throughout the entirety of summer, this was easily one of your favorites.

↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠

“Oh my god! So, how cute is his dog?” Jisoo squealed.

“Ten out of ten such a good doggo and soooo adorable!” You showcased the photos you took on your phone. There was a large section of your gallery of Yeontan in multiple angles, some were blurry from him moving around too much,  and some had you and Taehyung in the photos. Jisoo gushed over the cutest little ball of sunshine and constantly made remarks about how lucky you were to have met Taehyung’s dog.

“You’re so lucky, y/n. Taehyung is sane and has the cutest dog son in the world. I wish my parents allowed me to have a pet other than a fish.” Jisoo said as she pulled into a parking stall at school. “Remind me to get a new parking pass after school.”

You two arrived at school forty-five minutes before the first tardy bell would ring and this was for the sake of student parking. With a lot of the current seniors taking their driver’s test over the summer, it was most likely the parking lot was going to fill up rather quickly.

Before heading onto campus, you both just sat in Jisoo’s car listening to music and chatting about how exciting senior year was going to be for the both of you. Senior year meant college campus tours, college fairs, senior getaway and prom. Not only was there going to be a lot of stress involved, you made a promise to yourself to not be as stressed as you were during junior year.

“I can’t believe we’re seniors, y/n.” Jisoo sighed. “And if you’re going to senior prom with Taehyung who the hell am I going to take couple pictures with?!”

“Whoa, whoa, stop right there, Kim Jisoo. I think you’re getting way ahead of yourself.” You patted her hand.

Jisoo laughed and rolled her eyes. “Okay, whatever, but the boy likes you. Before you know it, he’s going to ask you to be his girlfriend in the most cheesiest way possible!”

The idea of Taehyung doing that was adorable yet embarrassing and plus, Taehyung knew that you didn’t like show-offy events like it; the thought of it made you feel uncomfortable.

“You’re crazy.” You laughed. “But I don’t want to get my hopes up, Jisoo. It’s a new school year. It’s possible for Taehyung to meet somebody new in his classes and I can’t force him to just stick with him.”

Jisoo squinted her eyes at you and folded her arms across her chest. “God, I hate it when you’re right.” She reached for her backpack and turned off her car engine. “Well, enjoy what you have now, y/n and let me enjoy teasing you about Taehyung.”

She stuck her hand out and you laughed while shaking it. “Deal.”

Throughout the whole morning, Taehyung only texted you a good morning message and you were thinking he probably fell back asleep right after. You asked him if he had eaten breakfast yet in your reply and by the time you left your house, he still didn’t respond. Honestly, you wanted to ask him if he wanted to meet someone on school grounds, but it felt like it was too much of a gesture; maybe it was all in your head--the feeling of it being too much.

You stuck with Jisoo for majority of the time. She planned on taking you around the bleachers where Seo Joon and his crew hang out during lunch, but a lot of the new clubs were having welcome booths and the literary club was calling your names.

“Come on, y/n!” Jisoo gently tugged on your hand, heading towards the football field and bleachers.

It was ten minutes after the final bell rang and you told Jisoo about Taehyung only texting you once throughout the day and she found it suspicious. She continued to nag you to check if he was on campus, but you wanted to just leave it alone. It was probably your gut talking to you and as much as you knew you had to trust your gut feeling, you didn’t want to listen.

“Jisoo, I don’t know, I don’t…” Your voice trailed off and you stared at the tips of your shoes.

“Y/n.” Jisoo squeezed your hand and stared deep into your concerned eyes. “You know you have to. And because I love you, I’m going to go with you.”

At this point, you didn’t realize that your body was gravitating towards the football with Jisoo still holding tightly onto your hand. You didn’t want to look up from your feet and when you did, all oxygen inside of you became trapped inside of your lungs.

Taehyung was sitting with the cluster of his friends at the bleachers, laughing and he even quickly checked his phone. There was a possibility that he was too caught up in catching up with his friends to text you another time or maybe he thought he replied to you but didn’t--it has happened a few times and he apologized when it happened. You were hoping for Jisoo to not say anything to get his attention, but Seo Joon called out before you could even tug her back towards the campus.

“Oh, hey, Jisoo.”

All at the same time, the group of friends turned towards you two and instantly, Taehyung’s eyes met yours. Jisoo continued to walk towards the bleachers not letting any of their stares bother her.

“We’re not here for you, Joon.” Jisoo snapped harshly at him and then stared down Taehyung. “Really, Taehyung?”

“Jisoo, stop.” You whispered.

All of Taehyung’s friends panned their heads from you and Jisoo to Taehyung. There was a look of panic on his face and already said everything that you needed to know. You wanted to run but your feet felt as if it was stapled to the ground. The air that was trapped inside of you was now released with one single blow.

“You’re friends with them?” Seo Joon questioned and first looked at Jisoo then back at you with a raised eyebrow.

You watched as Taehyung’s facial expression change from panic to sadness within seconds. “I--I don’t--” He stammered and slowly shrugged his shoulders.

Jisoo squeezed your hand tighter and she pointed an angry finger towards Taehyung. “Kim Taehyung, you fucking--”

“Jisoo, let’s go, please.” You interrupted Jisoo and hung your head down. You didn’t want to be there. You didn’t want to look at Taehyung. You just wanted to leave.

It took a lot for Jisoo to not cuss out Taehyung, you knew that. Instead, she complied with your request and took the lead in guiding you out of the football field and back to the parking lot. She didn’t say one more word and never let go of your hand the whole way there.

↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠

“THAT PIECE OF SHIT!” Jisoo threw her bag onto the concrete of your driveway. “Was he seriously going to stand there and look at you like you were a stranger?! Some fucking nerve he has!”

You sat on top of the hood of Jisoo’s car with your knees hugged to your chest. Thankfully, your parents were both still at work which meant you had the whole house to yourself, but you couldn’t bring yourself to walk inside.

“Maybe we’re taking this the wrong way, Jisoo.” You mumbled.  It was dumb to justify the look on Taehyung’s face.

“I’m sorry, y/n. But that’s bullshit. You know that I know what Taehyung’s face looked like.” Jisoo raked her hand through her hair. “He obviously didn’t tell his friends about you and I hate that I know why.”

There was a stinging sensation in your eyes and you blinked it away. You also had a feeling why he wouldn’t tell his friends. It was your worst nightmare and it was all coming true. You buried your face between your knees and your chest, wanting to disappear.

“Hey, hey, not another step! Go away!”

You poked your head up and found Taehyung stuck dead in his tracks with Jisoo walking to stand by your side.

“Jisoo, just let me explain--”

“I don’t think so, Taehyung. We get it. She gets it.” It was sweet of Jisoo to stand up for you, but honestly, you wanted to hear it from Taehyung himself.

“It’s okay, Jisoo. I’ll be fine.” You whispered whilst climbing down from her car.

She changed her glances between you and Taehyung before sighing. “Okay. I’ll be in your room then,” She held her hand out and you planted your house keys onto her palm. “I won’t be nosy, I promise.”

After giving Taehyung a deadly gaze, Jisoo scooped up both of your backpacks and disappeared inside of your house.

Taehyung walked towards you with hesitation weighing in every step. The hurt in your eyes was obvious and it made looking at you hurt even more because he knew he was the reason for it.

“Y/n...I can explain…” Taehyung began taking deep breaths. “I didn’t tell them...about you…”

There were tears filling up your eyes and you tried to blink them away, but one single tear managed to trickle down your cheek.

“I didn’t tell them anything b-because…” Taehyung’s words fell like stones, dropping slower and slower. Your chest began to tighten and your cheeks started to flare up.

“Because you were embarrassed?! Is that why?” Your words shocked you just as much as it did for Taehyung but it was the reason that was blaring inside of your head the most and you had to put it out there. “I read books, I’m quiet, I’m obviously not the type of girl who would be seen with you.”

Taehyung let out a breath of air and tried to reach for your hand but you pulled away. “That’s not...that’s not the reason, y/n.”

You clenched your jaw and wiped the tears from your eyes. “Look me in the eyes and tell me, with confidence, that that’s not the reason why you didn’t tell them.”

He tilted his head back and combed his fingers through his hair. “Seo Joon mentioned once that he didn’t know how you and Jisoo became friends because you seemed different from her and--”

“And you didn’t want to tell him because you were afraid if you told him, he would make fun of you and tell you that you probably deserved better. Got it, Taehyung.”

“Y/n...Seo Joon is a fucking dick, okay? And he wouldn’t have let me live if he found out that I was involved with someone that he--he thought--” Taehyung watched as your tears resurfaced and he took in a sharp breath. “Y/n, I like you. You don’t know how much I fucking like you, isn’t that enough?”

There was a moment of silence before you answered. “You’ve been in my house and you met my parents. I know your little cousin and his friends, I met your parents and your puppy. Why is Seo Joon’s opinion so important to you, Taehyung?”

He grit his teeth and sighed. “I don’t know, y/n. But I’m so fucking sorry.”

“Me too.”

You wiped whatever tears were stained on your face then turned your heel to walk away. He called out your names and each time he called for you, tears welled and you covered your mouth to stifle your sobs. From your driveway to your front door, you never once looked back.

Was it wrong to think you didn’t deserve this? Every girl deserves someone who wasn’t afraid to be with them and this included you.

It almost didn’t occur to you that you arrived in your room until Jisoo said your name. You dragged your feet to your bed and slumped your body down against the mattress.

“It would...It would’ve been too embarrassing…” You sniffled. “...too embarrassing if Seo Joon knew…”

“Y/n, I’m so sorry.” Jisoo immediately joined and curled up next to you, letting you bury your face into her shoulder to cry it all out. She stroked your hair, listening to you wail and question this had to happen to you.

Even with Jisoo in your room, you had never felt so alone.

↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠↠

Instead of quitting after summer, you decided to keep the job at the ice cream parlour because of the relationships you gained with your coworkers. Plus, when Jisoo told you that “more money meant more books,” it stuck with you.

The week stretched out a lot longer than you would’ve liked and as much as you wanted to relax on a Saturday, you were scheduled to work the afternoon shift. Even after sleeping in for a bit, you were feeling a bit groggy because your exhaustion caught up with you, but talking to Mrs. Song was making all exhaustion dissipate.

“School is just a mere distraction, deary. Marry a millionaire and you’ll be fine.” Mrs. Song instructed and her caregiver laughed and reminded her that you were still young and that you still had a lot to do in your life.

“Well, you do that, but don’t forget to marry a good man--have I told you about my late husband, sweetie?” Her caregiver smiled and winked at you.

“No, Mrs. Song. I’d love to know about him.” You smiled back at her and listened with your undivided attention. No matter how much times you’ve heard the stories, you would never get tired hearing how romantic her husband was with her. Even while you took care of other customers, she still talked about her life with him and you listened and asked questions so she knew that you were listening.

“So, he wasn’t a millionaire, Mrs. Song?--thank you, have a good day.” You handed a customer his change.

“Not at all, dear. But our time together was priceless.”

The entrance door opened and in came the last person you wanted to see, although it couldn’t be helped. When Taehyung walked in, his cousin and his friends came running in through the doors first and he followed with his hands in his pockets.

Mrs. Song greeted him as you tended to the kids with a smile. The last time you spoke to Taehyung was on Monday. He tried to reach out to you, but you didn’t bother to return any of his calls or texts. He only ever contacted you through phone and never at school which gave you the idea that he didn’t tell his friends anything.

You wanted to disappear into the back room, but you were already assisting his cousin and his friends.

“Hi, y/n.” Taehyung greeted quietly.

You gave the last cup of ice cream to one of the kids who then ran over to Mrs. Song.

“Hi.” It was instinct the way you grabbed a fourth cup to fill it up with chestnut praline ice cream. How were you supposed to enjoy this flavour when it now gave you bittersweet memories of summer?

“Y/n, I know you’re mad at me and you don’t have to say anything, but at least just listen to me.” Taehyung followed you from the other side of the counter as you walked from the ice cream casing to the register. “I let my pride get in the way because I didn’t tell my friends about you. It’s always been that way with Seo Joon and it’s so fucking annoying how I can’t put my foot down when it comes to him. Saying that makes me sound like I’m his bitch and I guess I am.”

You plucked the ten dollar bill out of his hand and listened, just as he instructed.

“I haven’t told him...yet…which is stupid, I know. You’re important to me and I haven’t been feeling like myself lately all because we haven’t been talking at all. It’s killing me, y/n.” Taehyung spoke as softly as possible, just enough for only you to hear. “I still really like you and I swear I’ll tell Seo Joon because you’re right, his opinion shouldn’t matter.”

You took the change out of the register and you didn’t even realize it, but you blinked away tears that surfaced at your water line. Words were getting caught up within your throat, threatening to burst out all at once. But now wasn’t the right time.

You laid his change out on the palm of your hand and as Taehyung took his change, his finger lingered to trace the lines that veined throughout your palm. He hung his head and failed to hide the sound of him sniffling.

“I admit my mistake and I’m just so sorry, y/n. I hope for you to forgive me one day.” Taehyung crumpled up his change inside of his receipt and stuffed it into his pocket. “Have a good day.”

“You too, Taehyung.” Your words were barely audible, but he still heard you.

With a blank expression, Taehyung gathered up his pack of children and made sure to give Mrs. Song the most cheerful smile he could muster up.

Not even a couple of feet away from Mrs. Song, Taehyung’s cousin asked Taehyung to retie his shoe laces because they were beginning to become undone. You walked over to Mrs. Song who was gently folding her napkin to wipe the corners of her mouth.

“You know, dear,” she began. “How about you try your chances with that young man who came in with his little friends? He seems like a nice boy.”

There was no point in explaining everything to Mrs. Song, so you just hummed and smiled at her. “He is, Mrs. Song.”

Without looking up from the counter, you could see Taehyung stand back up and you could feel his eyes burning towards you.

“How about it then, deary? I’ll introduce you two.” Mrs. Song suggested with confidence.

It difficult to hold back your tears in front of the ever-so-innocent Mrs. Song, but you had to grit your teeth and bear it.

“It’s okay, ma’am. I don’t think he’s interested in me.” You said sadly.

As much as you didn’t want to look at him, you finally lifted your chin to make eye contact with the regretful stare of Taehyung’s eyes. The intense contact was broken by his cousin, shaking Taehyung’s hand and telling him that they wanted to go to the park already.

As he turned his back to you, you physically felt the pain in the atmosphere. Who knows, maybe you were taking it to heart much harder than it needed to be. But if there was one thing that you knew for sure, it was that you were incredibly hurt about the fact that Taehyung had to hide your existence. He stared into your eyes as if he had no idea who you knew were.

You were furious, betrayed, and, with the lack of a better word, so fucking hurt by what happened. Being who you were, you also knew that there was no way you could stay mad at Taehyung forever. There was a sliver of hope for you to forgive him, but now wasn’t the time.

Taehyung was more than an entire summer of memories. He was an unexpected occurrence, like rain in a drought. He was your first text in the morning and your last text before going to bed. He became the reason for you to be excited to head to work, hoping for him to show up.

But the rain will stop falling, texts don’t get sent, work becomes a chore, and eventually, seasons end.

♡ rae

[thebibliomancer]

50 More Days of Comics! 43/50: Justice League Europe #19 (1990)

More Justice League Europe!

But, wuh? You may ask, if you’re invested in the minutiae of my mystery box. Didn’t you say the box was roughly sectioned and didn’t you already get through the DC section?

Yes. Yes I did.

But somehow I skipped three comics? I was counting up how many comics I had left and found it didn’t add up to 50 so went through the box and found that I couldn’t find posts for three comics. I know I wrote them up. I found them in my email. But I can’t find the posts. So I’ll have a very easy three days of 50 More Days of Comics by posting them.

So yes. More Justice League Europe!

This time following in the finest of comic book traditions: thinly veiled knockoffs of the competitor’s IP.

Marvel is more known for this because they get a lot of coverage out of their thinly veiled knockoffs. The Squadron Supreme (basically the Justice League) have become an important part of Avengers lore and even have their own well-regarded miniseries that is basically every Batman v Superman ever. And the League of Super-Heroes homage in the Shi’ar Imperial Guard has become a huge part of Cosmic Marvel and X-Men lore.

DC is no stranger to this either. It just doesn’t get folded into the lore quite the same way. A group of very Fantastic Four esque astronauts were mutated by cosmic radiation and then died, except for the faux Reed Richards who later becomes Cyborg Superman.

And as the Avengers fought the Squadron Supreme, so the Justice League fought the Champions of Angor with expies of Scarlet Witch in Silver Sorceress, Yellowjacket in Blue Jay, and Thor in Wandjina.

These Notvengers were from an alien world destroyed in nuclear holocaust by the Extremists, themselves expies of prominent Marvel villains.

Lord Havok for Doctor Doom, Dreamslayer for Dormammu, Gorgon for Doctor Octopus, Tracer for Sabretooth, and Doctor Diehard for Magneto.

You may recognize that these people have never been on a team together because it would be massive overkill and also there’d be so much clash of ego and personality and goals that they wouldn’t get one foot out the door before they all simultaneously backstabbed each other.

I give you all this exposition because this issue of Justice League Europe concerns the Extremists, or robot theme park versions of them, and also the two surviving Champions of Angor who have after a long time in the woods, either literal or metaphorical, found their way back to a Justice League book and have joined the team this time.

Fair is fair though. One of the many Hyperions (basically Superman) flapping around the Marvel U joined the Avengers for a while. And a Nighthawk (basically Batman) was on the Defenders for a whiiiile.

In previous issues, the Extremists have come to the Earth-1 and had Doctor Diehard/Magneto steal all the nuclear warheads in the world and threaten to detonate them. Due to reasons, most of the Justice League Europe end up on Angor where they find a broken down amusement park and a man cryogenically frozen?

To summarize down a bit: this is Uncle Mitch Wacky, a spoof on Disney, who had himself cryogenically frozen when he came down with an incurable disease. INFLUENZA!

This is a bafflement to Crimson Fox because on Earth influenza is well treatable but Uncle Mitch cuts her off before she can explain this.

Oh. So Crimson Fox is a later recruit to the team. She’s secretly two people and has pheromone powers because those are always anything but sketchy. She’s also exceptionally French. And is neither crimson nor wearing a very fox like costume.

Also here is the aforementioned Silver Sorceress who helpfully gives worldbuilding exposition about Angor. Also also, the Champions of Angor are apparently also known as the Assemblers?

Back on Earth, Martian Manhunter and Maxwell Lord discuss the UN unanimously agreeing to turn the world over to the Extremists because the alternative is nuclear annihilation. Its to buy time for the heroes to figure something out and in hopes that the Extremists are playing by their own rules and won’t just keep the missiles hanging overhead.

Back on Angor, they saved Carny’s brain. Or decapitated robo-head. Carny (apparently an expy of Arcade insofar as dangerous theme parks go) explains some more exposition.

After Uncle Mitch put himself on ice, the incredibly advanced robots of the park kept things running in hopes that Mitch would return to them as he promised. Very messianic King Arthur king under the mountain type feel.

So they even kept the park running smoothly during the nuclear annihilation of all life because dangit, that’s what Uncle Mitch would have wanted. Even when it became clear that there would be no more visitors because everybody dead.

They decided that they’d recreate the world inside the park. So they made a ride that would feature the Assemblers and Extremists and made them able to think and act on their own.

But whoopsie the Extremist robots killed the Assemblers robots and took over the park. Carny joined them because “it seemed like the happy, wacky thing to do.”

The robo-Extremists got restless, craving new worlds to conquer and eventually ditched Carny and the park for Earth.

At this point, Captain Atom (thankfully sporting a short haircut instead of a mullet despite it being the 90s now) has an idea.

Elseworld, the UN surrenders the world to the Extremists. So Doctor Diehard puts the nukes down in their silos thankful that he doesn’t have to be constantly focusing on that! But he can still detonate them in their silos so, y’know, don’t mess.

On Angor, Wacky Mitch reveals that he has a universal shutdown switch to his robots keyed to his neurological impulses. So now they have a trump card against the Extremists if they can only get back to Earth.

‘Oh hey I can totally get us back to Earth,’ says Silver Sorceress at this time. And she transports them back to Earth right in front of Blue Jay just when he’s being a pessimistic ass and driving Sue to distraction.

Mitch’s influenza hits him hard and he collapses, Captain Atom calling for super cool doctor Dr Light. No, not that one. The good one.

A quick time skip and Mitch is back on his feet and pumped full of antiobiotics. He’s not cured, obviously. He needs bed rest and an IV but he should be able to participate in a battle for the fate of the Earth as long as it doesn’t take too long.

Later, the Extremists base and they’re sitting around enjoying ruling the world but not really doing any ruling. Just snacking on some donuts, really. Pretty life like these theme park robots. Lord Havok considers that this was all too easy maybe but he doesn’t get much chance to muse on it because the ceiling suddenly explodes.

The Justice League Europe flies in and starts beating them up with specific focus on keeping Doctor Diehard confused and off-balance so he can’t use his powers to destroy the world.

The fighting is just time filler until Mitch Wacky can appear dramatically on a sand dune.

Uncle Mitch Wacky: “Hello, Tracer. Are you having a wacky day?”

The Extremists all instantly fixate on him and kneel in the sand before their creator-god.

Lord Havok: “Speak to us, Uncle Mitch! Are we wacky enough for you? Are we happy enough for you?”

Uncle Mitch: Uncle Mitch knows when you’ve been naughty and nice… and you, my boys… you have been very, very naughty!”

And all the Extremists switch off and collapse to the ground.

Y’know, I know they were going to destroy the world but they were really slaves to their programming. They were created to imitate the Extremists and the Extremists were world destroying monsters. In their robot hearts, they were fulfilling their purpose to make the creator-god-on-ice proud of them. The moral of the story is that the three laws of robotics exist for a damn reason. And maybe program your supervillain robots to be more wacky silver age stealing 40 cakes and less explode every nuke, hm?

Oh and then Uncle Mitch explodes.

Turns out that Dreamslayer (Dormammu) wasn’t a robot like the others. He’s the real deal. And he was trapped for five years in the Dimension of Terrors when the Extremists (the real ones) nuked Angor. By the time he got free he discovered that there was nothing left to terrorize and nothing to amuse him. So he hooked up with the Extremists robots to find a new world to conquer.

But now that the Justice League has ruined the fun game he was having hanging out with robots of his dead friends, now he’s just going to kill them all because this isn’t fun anymore.

Some legit cool visuals here. Bart Sears, Randy Elliott and Gene D’Angelo do stuff with intersecting pink lines here that makes pasting a spellcircle from google image search look like crap.

Crimson Fox intercepts the magical attack and blasts it right back at Dreamslayer. Turns out that Crimson Fox was really Silver Sorceress under an illusion. I don’t mean all the time, just this specific instance. Because Scarlet Witches beat Dormammus, fact.

Oh and Uncle Mitch is alive even though the last we see of him in this issue would seem to indicate otherwise. Dreamslayer has bad aim. Having helped save the day now he’s on bed rest getting over the deadly INFLUENZA. And yes, I do know that influenza really is deadly.

The Extremist robots are repurposed for Madame Clouseau’s Wax Museum and Flash and JLE bureau chief Catherine are visiting the museum wrapping up some final plot exposition as the comic wraps. Donating the deactivated robots to the museum being Catherine’s idea of a PR move.

It would later backfire horribly when Dreamslayer returned possessing Maxwell Lord and reactivated them. They’d be thwarted again but it would lead to the death of Silver Sorceress.

But comics be like that sometimes.

[unlikely-allies]

5/5

**Slight Spoilers**

Following World War IV and in the aftermath of mass nuclear detonation, the United States no longer exists. California has become an island referred to as Dregs. Portion of the island and others like it have become specialized junkyards, leading to location designations like Toaster Beach, Neon Street, and Tire Valley. Though the landscape is far bleaker than it is in our world, the technology in this dystopia is far superior to our own. Robots play a prominent role in daily life, and are strictly held to the Three Laws of Robotics: 1. A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm. 2. A robot must obey the orders given to it by human beings, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law. 3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Laws. Robots that do not adhere to the Three Laws are executed fight club style in the WarDome, where humans can make a buck fighting the malfunctioning bots. These malfunctions have been becoming more frequent. After the incident in Babel with Gnosis Labs, caution must be taken with robots that violate the Three Laws.

Dr. Monrova, head of Gnosis Labs, designed a new type of robot. Called Lifelikes, these androids were so realistic that they were almost more human than humans. They were stronger, faster, and could regenerate upon undergoing any bodily harm. Dr. Monrova adored his creations, referring to them as his children, and even having them bond and integrate with his own family. However, in trying to play God, Dr. Monrova created what would ultimately be his destruction. The Lifelikes rebelled, murdering the entire Monrova family and irradiating the city of Babel. Lifelikes were outlawed and Gnosis Labs fell from its seat of power.

Lifel1k3 by Jay Kristoff tells the story of Eve Carpenter, a mechanics wiz and part-time Dome Fighter who lives in Dregs with her grandfather and her best friend Lemon Fresh. During a Dome fight meant to pay for her ailing grandfather’s medication, Eve manifests and decommissions the malfunctioning opponent robot with a rage-filled scream. Pockets empty and ego bruised, Eve and Lemon head home, but witness a flex-wing crash and rush to the wreckage site. The friends discover that the pilot, who appeared to be dead, is actually a Lifelike. The android appears to be damage to the point of no return, so they decide to bring him home to potentially sell for parts.

The WarDome fights are broadcasted for the public, and news of Eve’s manifesting is far from a secret. The Brotherhood, a band of anti-cybernetic zealots arrive at Eve’s home intending on crucifying her. This bloodthirsty merry band of psychos soon become the least of Eve’s problems. Eve, her robot sidekick Cricket, robo-dog Kaiser, her grandfather Silas, Lemon, and the Lifelike named Zeke fall head first into an adventure that will leave Eve questioning just about everything she has ever known to be true.

Wow. All that I can say is wow. This book had me hooked after the first five pages. I actually can’t recall the last book that I was so quickly wrapped invested in. Lifel1k3 is a Mad Max meets Pinocchio meets Ex Machina dystopian thriller that will have you invested body, mind, and soul. Eve is a kickass female lead with ambiguous morals, but a heart of gold. Lemon Fresh may be small but her ego and mouth are huge. She is always ready with a sexual innuendo or sassy comment that will actually make you chuckle out loud, or at least make you crack a smile. Poor mother hen Cricket tries to keep these two crazy teenagers in line, but there’s only so much a little robot can do. Kristoff is able to take the almost over done idea of mankind being challenged by technology and make it into something that is completely unique, complex, and addictive. I never thought that I would want to live in a dystopian wasteland, but Kristoff’s storytelling makes it seem as though I am right there smashing bad guys with high voltage baseball bats with Eve and Lem.

Lifel1ke3 is a thinker. The questions it poses reach the reader on an almost philosophical level. This is further reinforced by Kristoff’s use of comparing the Lifelikes to fallen angels and referencing Paradise Lost. This of course only made the story more compelling to me. I immediately picked up on the Milton references as a devoured the novel. The line “Better to rule in hell than to serve in heaven” resonates throughout the novel. There are a million more layers that I could dissect and infinitely more positive things I could say about this novel, but the moral of this review is basically to go and read this book. Right now. Seriously, you won’t regret it. Lifel1k3 has solidified my stance as a devout Jay Kristoff fan and once you read this novel you will be too.

P.S. I have very strong feelings about the ending, but I don’t want to ruin it for anyone. If you’ve read Lifel1k3 and have equally strong feelings about/ want to discuss the end, please message me!