#why are you leaving?/why are you leaving?

[nthecannibal]

YES! I love Laerte, here some of my favorite comics from her!

by Laerte Coutinho

[fushitoru]

in another life, i would make you stay a gojo satoru (fix it) fic

pairing ⸺ reincarnated!gojo x reincarnated!reader

summary ⸺ you are a sorcerer, married to your husband who bears the burden of being the strongest. firsthand, you watch the love of your life fall apart, the world burdening him until, finally, he dies at the hand of sukuna. as you watch him through the broadcast, you blankly volunteer to be next and you die, praying to whatever merciful god out there that, in another life, you and satoru get the happy ending you both deserved— until you wake up from your dream, gasping. why the hell was your dream so vivid? you were some sort of magician? with a smoking HOT husband? and why the fuck does the guy that's ten minutes late to the first day of lectures look EXACTLY like him?

warnings ⸺ eventual smut fluff and angst (the holy trinity of aashi longfics), hurt/comfort, reincarnation fic, basically you and gojo have a miserable life in canon and get reincarnated into a modern au where i fix everything and give you the romcom you deserve, canon typical violence, jjk manga spoilers, mentions of blood and injury, major character death, fem reader implied

a/n i'll see u at the end :3

December 23, 2018.

“How do you feel?”

The both of you lay, side by side on the grass as you stared into the sky. The only sounds that surrounded you were the occasional rustle of leaves, the hum of the late afternoon cicadas, and the soft, almost inaudible rise and fall of your breathing.

The stars were really bright that day.

The sounds of nature were even more tangible in the absence of traffic. After the culling games had roped in both non-sorcerers and sorcerers alike, no one went out, so the roads were all virtually empty.

Satoru frowns thoughtfully, in a way that makes his nose scrunch up. His fingers play through your hair absentmindedly as he comes up with a response. With the way he’s thinking, your heart aches to tell him that you want his honest feelings, his doubts and fears, not some fake image he perpetually paints on for the rest of the world. You temper the urge.

“Fighting Megumi is gonna be…weird,” he says finally, with a sigh. “I’m just glad the real pain in the asses are out of the way.”

You remember the day he had come back from killing the higher ups. There was still blood matting his face and hair, dried and flaking. His eyes had long lost their light, and when you had got him alone in your shared room, grabbed a washcloth to wash his face. While you made sure none of the blood was still there, he had asked: Did I do the right thing?

It had taken three face towels to clean it all. The others had gotten soaked too quickly.

He continues. “I’ve been walking toward changing the system for so long, I forgot how to want anything past it.”

You tilt your head to look at him. His eyes are on the sky, as if trying to memorize every cloud.

“You can still want things,” you murmur. “Even now.”

What is left unsaid from you is, You can run away with me.

It’s a pipe dream at best. He was born with the shackle of the six eyes, born in the prison called The Strongest. Running away from it all was as possible as it was for Sisyphus to escape the burden of rolling the rock forever.

At your words, he huffs out a laugh and turns his head just slightly, eyes meeting yours. The blue of them is softer in this light, dusk and gold turning them the color of worn glass. “I do,” he says. “I want a stupid house with a stupid yard and a dumb dog who only listens to you.”

You laugh, blinking against the sudden sting in your eyes. “The dog would accidentally eat your god-awful heap of chocolates and drop dead.”

“Okay, then maybe not a dog then,” he accedes. “I could do with a cat. Just don’t confiscate my chocolates.”

Your voice is a bit stuffy when you reply with, “I would never.”

“Good,” His smile is crooked now, warm. “If I had all the chocolates and the cakes you bake for the rest of my life, I would die a happy man.” 

“You already have those, Satoru,” you laugh wetly. 

“Yeah, but I want grocery lists and laundry days and boring Tuesday nights. Not endless mission reports. God, I’m definitely not going to miss the paperwork,” he groans, and his tone would sound petulant to anyone else; to you, it’s a reminder of how he’s been worked to the bone.

You roll closer to him, forehead brushing against his temple. “We’ll have all of it.”

There’s a beat of silence. The wind rustles through the trees again. He closes his eyes and breathes it in, like he’s trying to make a home of it. You can’t help but look at his serene face and think,

I love you.

It goes unsaid.

Then, “You’ll wait for me?” he asks, almost like a joke.

You turn to him, gaze softening as it lingers on the line of his jaw, the sweep of his lashes, the eyes you’ve loved in a thousand different lights. He’s so beautiful it aches—like something out of a dream or a poem scribbled by a lonely poet on a dirty street, staring up at a beauty wistfully peering out of a window of a high tower.

“Always.”

December 24, 2018.

He looks like he’s watching the sky again.

You are staring down at the shape of him broadcasted through Mei Mei’s crows. The ground is soaked, and the sky doesn’t seem to know whether to rain or just stay gray. His eyes are open.

But you know better. And still, you wait.

Around you, there’s chaos. Your students, in disbelief, are talking loudly but it’s as if everyone around you is talking underwater, none of their words comprehensible. You feel someone shake you, but you’re still staring.

His eyes aren’t closed, but he looks peaceful.

The air thrums with cursed energy, of people in utter shock, and with fear so thick it could choke.

But all you can think about is a stupid patch of wildflowers blooming in your yard. They would’ve been his favorite color—blue, like his eyes when he was teasing you. Like his eyes when he told you he wanted a dumb dog and boring Tuesday nights.

You were going to plant them for him every spring.

You were going to make him cakes every time he forgot his own birthday.

You were going to grow old together.

Instead, you’ll be the one laying flowers on his grave. Alone.

“I’ll go,” you say.

It’s too quiet. Someone protests. You don’t even hear who.

“I said I’ll go.”

You’re already stepping forward. The fight is miles away but it doesn’t matter—you’ll find it. You’ll find Sukuna. You’ll follow the stench of blood and ruin until it leads you to him. 

You know your death is imminent, but there is nothing left to want anymore. Because a future without Satoru is no future at all.

As you make your way through Shinjuku rapidly, you can’t help but think of Yuji—his eyes wide and boyish, despite everything—as he shoved a flyer into your hand and told you to try that ramen shop with him once this was all over.

You remember Megumi’s ginger candies, the ones you had to keep hidden or Gojo would eat them all in one go. They’re still sitting in a dish by the kitchen window.

You remember Shoko’s voice when she said, “Just come back alive, okay?”

You remember Nanami, and Utahime, and Nobara. You remember every stupid, beautiful person you’ve ever loved.

You love them, but love doesn’t always save you; instead, it makes you walk straight into the fire.

Your life had begun when Satoru had saved you from that lonely, dark prison you were forced into; you remember how you had thought that he was akin to a glowing deity, descended from heaven to be your savior. A discarded animal like you, made to believe you were human again by this savior.

So it feels right, in a terrible, sacred way, that your life should end with him, too.

When you finally spot Sukuna, you put up a good fight, but anyone who watches you knows you are resolved, have accepted your fate and prefer death. You don’t scream or cry when it happens; you stare at his face when your body is cleaved into spilling your blood like an endless dam.

You just think: I kept my promise.

I waited.

Then, as you feel everything growing darker and darker, there’s only one thought left, just a silent prayer to whatever god that might still be out there:

Let us try again.

Please—let us try again.

…

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

You wake up from your dream, gasping.

The noise your alarm makes is an unfriendly wake-up call; in your furious effort to locate your phone—which has found itself nestled in your messy blankets—you notice your roommate, Maki, blearily shifting. You madly search to minimize the yelling you’re going to get from her later in the day (you’re already cooked by this point), until silence blankets the room once more.

It’s only until your phone is silenced that you register how fast your heart is beating. Then, when you trudge over to the personal bathroom you and Maki share and flick the light switch, you see that tears had flowed down your cheeks in your sleep.

What a weird fucking dream.

One to have on your first day of classes for the semester, too. You squint at your reflection, the fluorescent light doing your sleep-addled eyes no favors as you grudgingly get ready, brushing your teeth and washing your face and all that. You don’t know why it was so vivid. 

From the dredges of your mind, you first recall the flashing light beams and carnal violence in the destruction of the city, and then you. Were you some kind of magician? It was kind of like…Winx Club, but you weren’t a cunty fairy in cute clothes. Something about sorcerers, so maybe Harry Potter? Hunter X Hunter?

You spit out the frothy mix of your saliva and the mouth freshener. So ridiculous. You couldn’t even blame stress for the weird fanfiction at this point—classes haven’t even started.

Memories of the dream ebb and flow as you try hard to remember what else had occurred as you wipe your face. Gazing upon the white of the moisturizer you’re dabbing on your skin, a flash of white suddenly resurfaces.

Gojo.

A violent feeling overcomes your chest at the name, and you think you’re having a heart attack with the way it clenches like you’re almost about to weep in longing of a beloved. You gasp, cupping the left side of your chest as you try to lower your heart rate.

What hurts most of all is the searing pain, like a spiral of thinly corded string has branded itself on your ring finger. In your rush to look up in the mirror to see what could be hurting you, you don’t notice the red glow it forms. What you see in the see in your reflection surprises you: you’re crying again.

Tears have fully started streaming down your face with the pain, carving wet valleys on your cheeks as they went. After your heart rate slows down, you frown while looking down at your hands. Why were they shaking?

You repeat the name numerous times in your brain, each time causing you to physically tweak. Gojo, Gojo, Gojo, and then resurfaces Satoru, Satoru, Satoru—

It’s after the tenth time you repeat his name that your body seems to calm itself down and get accustomed to whatever emotional shock that coursed through your name after you mentioned his name. His name originally came up because you remember the main person in your dream: the white-haired man. He was the reason you decided to confront that…three armed man? Or did he have four arms? Regardless, you basically offed yourself after he died because you loved him, or something. With the way your body seems to physically shake at the sheer thought of his name, as if the utter image of longing, love may not have been enough to describe what you felt.

Realizing that you’ve drifted off at reminiscing sleepily, you start, as if suddenly animated. You pat your skin, setting in the final step of your skincare routine. Then, you click on your phone screen to check the time.

And notice immediately that you are going to be late.

Then ensues you scrambling to your room, putting on your clothes, tripping on the floor in the process, getting a sleepy glare from Maki that has doubly certified that you are getting a scolding, and then finally making it out the door. The somewhat cool fall weather hits your face as you walk on the pavement, checking your clock repeatedly to ensure it hasn’t hit 9am yet. 

When you make it into the lecture, you realize that it is packed. There aren’t many seats—it is a gen ed class after all, something on some ancient history, and you notice two empty seats, side-by-side, tucked away in the corner of the lecture room. You have to carefully maneuver yourself down the seats.

Navigating the maze of limbs and backpacks, you mumble a series of "excuse me’s" and "coming through’s" until you squeeze past two guys—a stern-looking blond with glasses that scream "salaryman thirst trap" and a loud brunet beside him. Reaching your target, you slide into the seat that leaves an empty one between you and the blond. You’re very pleased about the extra breathing room.

Maybe today won’t be so bad after all.

You prepare your supplies to take notes on the first (of many) syllabus reviews to come. In the meantime, you’re privy to hearing the mumble and grumble of people around you; it’s only when a throat clears itself at the head of the class do you see a man—probably the professor of this class, Yaga—who has the slides already up. Ancient East Asian History is branded on the big white screen in bolded, black Arial font. Clearly, graphic design was not his passion.

His voice projects through the mic and is fairly deep and resonant, so it’s clear to everyone, despite the number of people in the room, that class is starting. As expected, the next slide is titled “What is Ancient East Asian History?” 

“Let’s delve deeper into what I mean by East Asian. Asia is a subcontinent that’s home to a diverse set of cultures, and even so in East Asia…”

As Yaga speaks, time ebbs and flows around you. The monotonous sounds of papers flipping, pens scratching on paper, and the clicking of keyboards surrounds you. You can’t help but think the fluorescent lights, harsh and white, had to be designed to keep students from falling asleep, because their intensity paints the lecture hall in this weird lighting. The mood created by it is something akin to the filter horror movies perpetually have on—vivid, but cold and dark. Like when you’ve been up for too long to the point that you don’t know if it’s night, or morning, because it’s still dark out. Then, dawn breaks, the sun enveloping the sky in its warmth.

Suddenly, the heavy set of doors that serve as your lecture hall’s entrance open loudly—louder than someone who is sheepishly entering late. Instead of the usual indifference reserved for a fellow student who had slept in, the room ripples with murmurs and giggles, shattering the silence that had settled—save for Yaga’s lecturing.

You don’t look at first. You look at Yaga, who is pinching the bridge of his nose as he mutters, “In Japanese culture, punctuality is a form of respect—something we are clearly still learning.”

You don’t turn. You don’t need to. But, like a current pulling you under, your gaze follows the crowd’s. And you see him.

Gojo.

Suddenly, your heart clenches violently, and you can only help but gasp hoarsely and shut your eyes. If you didn't, streams of tears would flow down your face once more. You couldn’t help but swear internally; you had thought you had conditioned yourself to be stable at the mention of his name. 

But, almost as if it’s subconscious, you wrench your eyes open, desperate to view the boy. You’d assume something apologetic, maybe. Rushed. Someone with their hood up, mumbling an excuse as they shuffle into the shadows of the back row. But this—

This is someone who walks like he knows the sound of his own footsteps matters. His ivory hair is tussled, like he had just rolled out of your dream. He looks a bit younger than he did when you had seen him, but his eyes are the same unmistakable brilliant, cerulean color.

Now, he’s making his way down the stairs, skipping every third one with his long legs. Something leaves his lips, and it’s something humorous—depending on how girls and guys around him laugh, a shared sense of adoration in their eyes. You can only help but watch as he comes closer and closer to you, and you remember belatedly that the seat next to you is the only empty one in the whole lecture hall.

Yaga huffs and rolls his eyes, crossing his arms in barely concealed annoyance. “Nice of you to join us, Gojo.”

Gojo lifts a hand in a lazy wave. “Yaga, you ever tried finding parking on this campus?” The lecture erupts in barely muted half-sleepy giggles. 

It’s only when a particularly loud high five he receives—by the brunet in your row—that you break out of your reverie and turn to your laptop, flustered. Any attempt to act nonchalant would be funny as if the thing that’s wrong with you—that invisible thing—hasn’t been rippling violently inside your gut the moment you laid eyes on him. Like your body has just been handed proof. Like a wound cracking open in slow motion.

He’s approaching, long legs trying to get through the sheer amount of people to where the empty seat next to you was, and when he’s there, right next to you, you shouldn’t look up.

But you do.

When your eyes meet his, something ancient and awful coils in your throat. A shiver, not of fear, but of recognition so buried it aches.

Pearly teeth and bright blue eyes glistening. A breathless, “Hi.”

And the invisible string, that had spiraled and corkscrewed itself into the jumble it was, pulls—until it is straight and wrung tight. You don’t know this boy. You’ve never seen him before.

So why does it feel like your heart just remembered how to break?

Your throat is dry, but you manage out a “Good morning.”

You turn back to your desk, your fingers quivering. By your side, he’s moving and rummaging through the contents of his backpack quite noisily, one that can be heard throughout the lecture hall if one were to tune out Yaga’s droning. In curiosity of seeing what was taking him so damn long to find, you turn your head slightly, and notice the heaps of wrappers—all pastel colored and bright, like candy and dessert wrappers—that his backpack is almost suffocated with. Then, he pulls out his laptop, opens it, and resumes the game of Run 3 he had paused beforehand.

Respectfully, what the fuck.

As if sensing your stare, he turns to you until meeting your eyes; you were caught. Like a deer caught in headlights, you helplessly stare back at him, heat creeping up your neck, and his gaze leaves your eyes to look at your lips, which you were biting.

Then, he leans in slightly—you also inching yourself back because why is he getting so close and why is your heart beating so fast—and whispers, “Do I know you?”

You’ve never seen him outside of the weird dream you had, and it would’ve been weird to admit that you’ve dreamed about him. “No, I don’t think you do,” you whisper back, voice hoarse.

His lips quirk in response, but, to your dismay, he doesn’t retract. His brows furrow while he stares at your face, as if deep in thought, and nods, flirtatiously saying, “Makes sense. I feel like I wouldn’t have forgotten you if I had met you.”

Despite the cheesy line, heat creeps up your neck, and you can’t help but bitterly look down at your desk after giving him a quiet, “No, I don’t we have. I’m sorry.” If he flirted with a stranger like this, dream you must’ve had a really hard time as his wife. Shameless.

And thus the lecture runs its course. Throughout, you’re tense, the heat of his presence never letting you relax. You feel every movement of his fingers, his forearms, as he played his games or typed miscellaneous things that you didn’t see because you were physically forcing yourself to stare at the lecture slides, back ramrod straight.

It’s only until his leg starts shaking that you start feeling…weird. His reaction is completely normal; you don’t blame him, because Yaga’s been going over the syllabus’ section of projects and how you can’t change project partners for over thirty minutes. But it’s the fact that a steady wave of nausea is building up inside you, until a sharp piercing sensation overwhelms your head.

Then, a vision.

It’s hazy, as if projected on cloudy water. A shaking leg, clad in what seems like uniform pants, underneath a small wooden desk. Then, a hand reaches out to yours, grasping it firmly, and you feel a weird sense of nausea once more. However, it’s not the same feeling you’ve been feeling since your dream—instead, it’s a stomach upturning feeling of being teleported somewhere.

A bed.

It’s a small one, in a room that resembles a dorm. The hand grasping yours isn’t simply grabbing your hand; it’s now trailing up your sock-covered ankle, up your calves, and then under your skirt—

The murky vision gets even murkier until you can’t register anything anymore. Then, you suddenly return, the fluorescent lights being the first thing you register after the weird deja-vu-memory thing. The feelings you felt from the vision linger, including overwhelming feelings of euphoria, lust, and sheer happiness that bloom in your heart warmly, like a flower in fresh spring.

You’re so distraught from the complicated jumble of feelings that have thrusted themselves upon you that you don’t hear Yaga say his concluding words. It’s the jarring, obnoxious screech! of the chair next to you—Gojo’s—that you jump to your senses and realize half of the students have left. 

Thus, you hurriedly pack your things and book it the fuck out of there because you would rather die than be the last person to leave class, lest Yaga think you were staying behind to talk to him. You’ve had more than your fill of East Asian Studies today.

Maybe it’s best if you avoid Gojo, lest you slip up. The dream—and the weird reactions your body seems to be having in his presence—are too…peculiar. If something happened, you wouldn’t know how to recover.

In your haste, you don’t realize you’ve left something behind, nor did you hear the “Wait! You forgot….this” that Gojo had called out to you, staring at the object in his hand—and your retreating back—with a complicated expression.

next. the aftermath (soon!)

a/n short chapter, but this series is going to contain a mixture of: a lot of crack and fluff, yearning (as always, yall know me), and debilitating angst ("who did this to you??" oh i loved writing the angst) and crazy reunion sex. comment down below to be added to the taglist!!

to be clear, unless otherwise indicated, reader is getting these moments from the past as "migraines" / flashes / dreams.

TAGLIST P1:

@nithica @rh-tg1 @tbzzluvr @spookytyphoonfire @vsynical

@totallyuniquenut @yamiyas @nishayuro @nariminsstuff @starmapz

@sylusonlylove @purplemint @elliesndg @gggellaa @arabellasolstice

@arrozyfrijoles23 @yeehawbrothers @that-one-lightskin @candyluvsboba @avaults

@iheartkhloe @angelcherrry @madamechrissy @xxemmarldxx @lovenbesos

@liveforkny @nattie-smack @cherryredribbons @introvertatitsfinest @starlightoru-gojo

@hyori2 @gxldencloset @l0v3m3m0re @cuntysaurusrex @nanamineedstherapy

@oikawasxx @littlemisspoets-blog @anuncalledbridge @watermelonmuntchers @zeyno-14

@k-kkiana @nanamiskentos @kviwi @evawts @forest-nymph420

@bontensh0e @viiennie @blossomedfloweroflove @6isek @dreamssfyre

[tboyrory]

So I’m at the stage in my transition where I’ve switched to the men’s bathroom, because people swear up and down I pass (hey, note to all the cis people reading this, DON’T tell your trans friends they pass just to make us feel better, this shit can put us in actual danger if we believe you! Just be honest! Tell me if I’m clockable, it’s for my safety!)

Anyway, so I go into the men’s restroom today, it’s empty, only guy in there is a worker that’s cleaning the stalls. There’s a freshly cleaned one thank fuck. Right as I’m about ready to enter, a group of at least five or more cis boys (late teens or young adults) head right in and I just hear, “hey, this is the men’s right?”

I duck into the stall. I sit there for ten minutes waiting for these guys to leave, they’re loud as fuck and yelling at each other and one of them won’t shut the fuck up about a “woman in the bathroom” with them. And his friends are all like, “really, where?” “I think a stall” and I just have to sit there until they leave. I’m texting my friend in the stall because she’s right outside. She’s trying to assure me that they aren’t paying attention to me, they’re likely just doing their business. No, one of them, the one that clocked me, was very much interested in me. She tells me when they’ve finally left.

She seems to understood that I was in some danger, but I had to explain to her just how much, because she really thought I could just walk out of there and be okay. “What, did you think they’d like ambush you outside the stall? Or harass you?”

Fucking yes? One of them kept saying “there’s a woman in here” to his friends. And why did it take so fucking long for them to finally leave?

On a funny note, someone came over to the stall, and some guy was like, “I think someone’s tryna take a shit in there” it was just me waiting lmao. Also I’m two years on testosterone, high dose, I need people to shut the fuck up about how we all pass perfectly after like a year.

[spacexfucker]

i've seen so many people (usually women) say about the stitch remake "let nani be happy" in regards to giving up lilo and going to the USA for school

which just like goes to show that people are right you know? white people cannot engage with media that is not about them and watch it to gain new perspective. you see white people do this with ghibli all the time.

in this instance, white people watched the original stitch, absorbed absolutely nothing about the message on colonialism or that nani desperately actually wants to keep lilo, and instead just superimposed themselves onto nani. of course they think she should "just be happy" and leave her sister with the state. of course they think that "she's with a family friend and can portal any time".

there's not even a shallow understanding of the original movie and its themes. there's absolutely no knowledge of Hawai'i and its history and how Hawai'ians feel.

By and large, white people as a group are hyper individualists. it's like a cornerstone of white supremacy. "my wants/desires/needs above all others" and "my comfort above all others". They think Nani deserves their version of happiness. One that's how they navigate real life: sacrificing everything but personal gain under the guise of self care. Acting like abandoning your family and community is only brave and freeing. Painting it like a feminist retelling of the original.

So many proving they are not immune to propaganda. That disney can just wrap up this colonialist retelling of a once profound story and package it to you with smiley stickers and sanitized storylines of the Progressive Woman Who Girlbosses To Happiness and you lap it up because feminist stories are just about Doing What's Best For Me Only apparently. It pivots away from Nani's agency in the first movie. Her desire to do all she can to keep Lilo. And people celebrate it because feminism is when women do What I Think They Should to be Happy.

I don't think enough people listen to people who have been in the system. Or understand how dangerous it is to have it painted as heartwarming and safe. It doesn't matter who Lilo is with at the end of the movie. If you think the state won't disappear children you need to look up some statistics and ask yourself why Nani was so desperate to keep her in the original film.

[jaylaxies]

CALL ME WHEN YOU HATE ME LESS

PAIRING: jake sim x fem!reader (ft. jaehyun and heeseung).

GENRE/CW: smut, angst, eventual fluff, porn with plot, unprotected sex, cunnilingus, fingering, choking, blowjob, using panties as a gag, spitting kink, edging, squirting, slight overstimulation, mentions of fighting, blood, usage of nicknames, slowburn if you squint, emotional trauma, lmk if i missed anything!

WORD COUNT: 18,321 words. (18.3k)

SYNOPSIS: Jake Sim was a walking academic hazard—hot, broody, and failing just about everything that wasn’t football. Enter you, his new tutor: organized, overachieving, and absolutely not here for his attitude or his annoyingly perfect lips. But between late night study sessions, petty insults, and one very inconvenient almost-kiss, things start spiraling—fast. He’s supposed to be you project. You are supposed to hate him. Instead, you both are one sarcastic comment away from either a breakdown or a makeout, and honestly, it could go either way.

WARNING: 18+ content, minors dni (the full fic will include smut).

A/N: hihi, angels! if you have seen this before then yes, it is a revamp of my jeno fic as requested by a few anons! i hope you guys will enjoy it! all likes, comments, reblogs are highly appreciated! it keeps me motivated! iloveyou all and happy reading <33

Chapter 1: Raised in Shadows, Told to Shine. 

Comparison. 

The core of all insecurities. The onset of overthinking. The path to self loathing. 

That’s what comparison does to a person—drive them to the edge of insanity in hopes of turning into something; into someone the others will look up to, compare themselves to. 

It was a bad thing per se, but it was motivation enough for Jake to work harder in order to leave the country, to get away from his family. 

The reason? His mother ever so conveniently happened to have fallen in love with a rich guy, someone who never knew what struggle meant, and Jake was just four back then, he didn’t bother changing his surname. It didn’t take much time for him to settle into the lifestyle, however, no matter how much he could have prepared to face his step-brother, he simply couldn’t bother looking him in the eye. 

Why? Because he was known to be the epitome of perfection. Jung Jaehyun was the son every parent wanted, the student every teacher was fond of, the doctor every nurse wanted to work with. 

The sweet dimple on his cheek was a great asset in melting the hearts of everyone in his proximity or afar. 

Jake on the other hand, wasn’t quite sure why he wasn’t considered to be enough, especially when he got decent grades throughout his school life, he wasn’t a bother, kind to those who were around them, but it changed. 

It changed when he got daily reminders of how he wasn’t even close to how amazing and successful his step brother was. 

That’s when things started looking down for Jake. He stopped caring about the grades, he wasn’t sure why he was supposed to put up a I’m so good, so smart act in front of others when there was no reason for him to do that. 

Others didn’t bother doing the same for him. 

Rather, he tried to work upon the only thing he was passionate about, the only thing that mattered to him—football. 

Despite winning several trophies for playing the sport, his parents labelled it to be useless, which broke the last fragment of his heart, shattering it to the point of no return. 

Which would explain his current demeanor—moody, permanent scowl on his perfectly sculpted face and no care for the others around him. His sole focus being football, which is also the reason behind his current dilemma. 

“Being an excellent player in the sports team does not guarantee you your scholarship, Mr. Sim,” Jake’s teacher incharge spoke up, taking off her specs right after reviewing his annual grade report, “you’re failing three out of five modules, and if you don’t start getting back on track soon, then I’m afraid you won’t be able to play in the team anymore.” 

Fuck. 

Jake had been neglecting his studies, he admits, yet he never thought that he’d reach this point. It’s not that he wasn’t smart, he simply had no motivation to go on with his studies. His parents could easily pay the university to keep him around, however, he wanted nothing from them, which also explains why he got himself a scholarship in the first place. 

“I’m sorry if I’m late.” Jake’s eyes snapped wide open, turning back to see his step brother entering the teacher’s cabin. 

“Why are you here?” Jake asked, a muscle in his jaw twitching but Jaehyun only smiled. 

Jake’s professor was equally stunned, probably even more with her jaw wide open at the appearance of such a handsome young man. 

“I called him in since your parents were busy,” his professor said, handling Jake a letter, “go and find your tutor in the council room, she’ll be helping you with the upliftment of your grades, Mr. Lee, and now if you’ll excuse us, I’ve got to fill in your brother with your current situation,” she said the last part awfully sweetly as Jaehyun sat down in one of the vacant chairs, smiling at her kind tone. 

Jake scoffed, the demeanor change around Jaehyun went crazy and he wasn’t a fan of it, especially when he was called in to complain about his mistakes. 

He simply wanted to leave the university and never come back. 

He waited, taking deep breaths before punching the wall, not being able to contain his anger. The impact did hurt, yet he paid no heed to it, the blood dripping as he walked towards the council room to get over with the day. 

The name written on the sheet wasn’t unfamiliar to him, rather it only wearied the already infuriated boy as he knocked on the door of the student council room, which was empty except for you sitting there, working on a few papers which appeared to be the newsletter for the month. 

“Come in,” you allowed, not looking up as Jake made his way inside the room, observing the surroundings where he’s never been before. 

Then he looked your way, taking in your appearance. You looked cozy in your university varsity jacket, your specs sitting on your nose as you buried yourself in reading whatever it was that you were reading. He couldn’t deny you looked pretty in a way that’s comforting to eyes. 

With no words exchanged, he pushed the letter towards you, which finally made you look up at the source of disturbance, your eyebrows raising slightly as you most certainly did not expect the star football player to visit you in the council room, which he’s never been to before. 

He simply stood there, hands shoved into his pockets while still looking around, and you took a second to grab the letter, skimming over to read and understand that the letter was given by Mrs. Kim, the teacher in charge of your department, requesting you to take up the few teaching sessions you had applied for, Jake being the student you’ll have to teach for the same. 

You clicked your tongue, folding the letter exactly as it was before pushing it his way, your arms folding across your chest as you finally spoke up, “I reject. I don’t wish to teach you.”

His eyes were quick to snap towards you, finally staring right into your own eyes, irritation clear as he pushed his tongue on his inner cheek, eyebrow raised. 

“Aren’t you supposed to kiss your professor’s feet, given that you’re in student council? And here I thought you’d be a good girl.” Jake rasped, resting his arms on your table, leaning down to your level. 

You chuckled, expecting the exact response from him, “this is exactly why I don’t want to waste my time on you—you athletes don’t wish to study, you just require a passing grade, for which, I don’t have time to spare.” 

“What the fuck do you mean waste your time?” 

“Sim Jake, you’ve got more money with you than your bank account can handle, so I’m sure losing your scholarship won’t do you much harm,” you said with a sickening smile, “you’ve got no interest in studying, your attendance record states that oh so proudly.” 

“You don’t know shit about me,” Jake seethed out, messy hair strands falling over his eyes. 

“I know everything I need to know about you. Now excuse me, unlike you, I actually have work to do,” you said, passing him a tight lipped smile, not letting the proximity faze you. 

“You—” 

Jake’s sentence was cut short with two sharp knocks on the slightly ajar door, a head peeking in, successfully garnering your attention. You could feel your mood doing one eighty with the sudden intrusion of this stranger—whom you didn’t wish to be a stranger around anymore, your eyes softening, lips parting as you stared at him in awe. 

Meanwhile, if Jake thought that the day was done being a bitch to him, then he was wrong because the level of irritation that bubbled up in him the moment he saw the change in your expressions. 

“Sorry to interrupt, may I get in?” Jaehyun asked, smiling his usual dimpled smile, which had you swooning in record time. 

You could practically see veins of frustration popping out on Jake’s neck, “no. Your work is done, you should head back home,” he groaned, but Jaehyun only looked you way, continuing to get in, looking your way. 

“I’m Jaehyun, Jake’s elder brother. I can’t thank you enough for agreeing on giving him tutoring lessons, especially with how busy you must be with council duties,” he spoke up, shaking your hand, which was smaller in his warm, big hands. 

Jake scoffed, “she’s not—”

“Of course, Jaehyun! It’s my pleasure to help him out, and it’ll only help me better with my extracurricular credits! It’s no problem,” you nodded, a gentle smile on your face as your eyes practically twinkled with excitement, taking in the beauty that Jaehyun beheld. 

It was ridiculous. 

It was absurd how just two sentences; paired with a sweet smile from his brother, were enough for you to change your decision, in the span of two seconds at that. 

He tightened the hold he had on the strap of his black bag, “no fucking need. I’ll find another tutor,” Jake deadpanned, walking out of the room, not paying attention to Jaehyun who called out his name in the background. 

He wouldn’t let you use him to get to his brother. 

With that thought, he decided to detour and make his way to the gym, trying to blow off steam by practicing punching, each one getting progressively stronger as his mind replayed the difference in your behaviour when it came to him and his brother. 

It didn’t bother him that his knuckles were bruising, he knew he needed this extrinsic pain to get rid of the obvious hurt he felt each day. 

And he couldn’t understand why he felt so affected by your actions, especially when it was the first time you had met. 

Jealousy was indeed a bitch. 

Chapter 2: Surrendered to the skirt. 

Two days passed by and Jake’s mood showed no progress in terms of improving, rather, he felt worse each time the memory invaded his brain. He tried his best to sit down and open the first module of the unit he had to study. 

It’s not like he was bad at studying, he was just a bit out of practice, and well, his mental health wasn’t doing much to help him get any better. 

Just when he was about to actually get a hang of getting into the topic, the doorbell rang. His parents were out for business, as usual, and his step brother was busy doing morning shifts, which meant that he was alone at the mansion, minus the myriad of worker staff they had to take care of the place. 

Essentially, he had to get down to see who it was at the door, only to spot you leaning against the doorframe as one of the attendants had asked you to wait. He stopped, observing you from the staircase as you typed something on your phone. 

Why were you here after clearly rejecting him? Why were you here when he’s clearly told you he doesn’t want you to be his tutor?

Scoffing, he walked down the stairs and towards you, standing right in front of you, clearly invading your personal space as he decided to lean against the same side of the thick door frame with his brows raised.

You took a second to take in his appearance as he was clad in casual gray sweatpants with a blank tank, which honestly did nothing to hide his muscles. 

“Why are you here?” Jake asked with a bored tone. 

“I’m here to teach you, remember?” You gave him a pointed look. 

“And I clearly told you I don’t wish to study from you, it’s better if you leave now. I’ll just tell Mrs. Kim that you taught me,” he said, almost turning back to go inside. 

“And have them wondering how you failed even after getting tutored by me? Yeah, I don’t think so,” you shook your head, inviting yourself in without second thoughts. 

“Y/n, I’m not fucking kidding, you should leave. Besides, the one you came for isn’t at home at the moment,” he muttered bitterly. 

That caught your attention, “oh? Busy with a job then?” You asked, looking around the exquisite paintings hung at the entrance of his place. 

“Are you gonna leave or do I have to call the guards to escort you out?”

You chuckled, “you really don’t want the previous year questions I have? The council students get them each year you see, they’re bound to guarantee you good marks,” you explained with a smirk. 

Jake groaned, his lip bitten as he tried to think if tolerating you would be worth the questions, but his football career was at stake and there was no better option but to accept it. 

“What’s the catch?” Jake asked after a few seconds, sighing with defeat. 

“Nothing at all. We both know that you need these papers to get the grade that you wanna achieve and I’ll get my extra credits,” you reason. 

“You just wanna meet my brother,” he said dryly, “either way, you won’t get to see a lot of him, he’s always at the hospital, working and being the perfect son he is. Plus, he’s definitely not into uni students,” he looked you up and down, soon gulping and looking elsewhere. 

You were clad in a pretty skirt which showed off your legs—which you did wear in hopes of crossing paths with Jaehyun, but you completely missed how Jake was staring at your body. 

He wasn’t sure if it was out of hatred that he stared at you, or it was admiration because you were one of those people he despised—overachievers.  

You were in the student council, got good grades and professors favoured you, it wouldn’t be a surprise if your parents loved you for being the ideal daughter. It most certainly didn’t help that your appearance seemed as if you were the sweetest, kindest angel on earth, which wasn’t the case when you were around Jake though. 

“I’ll manage,” you shrugged, “so, I need your final word, Mr. Sim.”

“I am sure I can find better tutors than you,” he raised his brows, challenging you and you didn’t look fazed at all. 

“I am quite literally the best, professor Kim asked me to tutor you for a reason, besides, no one’s gonna agree to help you out with exams being only one month away,” you made your point, extending your hand for him to finalize his decision. 

Overconfidence. He sighed. 

Jake stared at your extended hand, thinking of the bigger picture here. He’d get tutoring and would be able to score decent grades if he gets back to his usual routine of studying. 

Downside? He’d have to face you each day. 

Sighing and keeping his feelings in check, he simply nodded, taking your smaller hand into his as he accepted the offer, suddenly aware of the warmth of your palm and how it leaves a tingling feeling behind as you shake his hand firmly with a smirk. 

“So, where are we gonna study?” 

Chapter 3: Silent room, a loud mind. 

Turns out, it’s not that easy to sit down and just teach Jake. 

Given the amount of classes he had missed, or rather, the amount of classes he had managed to attend, it was clear that he didn’t even have the basic idea of the syllabus for the semester modules. 

Moreover, you had already pissed him off by mentioning how you didn’t expect him to have such a clean and organized room, as if you had already decided that he was going to be a messy human. 

Moving forward, you both sat down next to each other with your laptop open in front of you as you made him write down all the topics he needed to cover for the next month, forming a sort of timetable of a kind. 

It was surprisingly peaceful between you two, as if you both wished to get over with it as soon as possible, behaving as civilly as you could but there was this one thing that Jake couldn’t stop doing. 

Overthinking. 

It’s the way you looked his way with disappointed and concerned filled eyes whenever he messed up, the way his jaw clenched when you told him to do better, the way he couldn’t help but stare at your glossed up lips as you looked around his room, eyes settling on his childhood pictures which were framed. 

It was also new to him to actually interact with people outside of his football team, especially girls. He couldn’t remember the last time he had talked to one. He wondered what was going on in your mind, he wondered if you were silently judging him through it all.

That’s all what people in his life did anyway. 

“You were cute as a kid, what happened to you now?” You joked, chuckling as you looked his way, only to find his mouth slightly agape.

He hadn’t expected you to say that, and he certainly didn’t want to retort back with something that would ruin his mood, “I grew up to be hot is what happened to me,” he replied smoothly. 

“Oh, so you do know how to joke around,” you raised your brows in surprise. It was indeed the image he had formed over the years. The image of him being nothing more than a rude jock who wouldn’t even reply to someone nicely. 

Now that you were actually interacting with him, you were going to find out how many of the rumors were true about him. 

He only leaned closer at your statement, you could see his muscles flexing as he rested one arm on the table in front of you both, “it’s not a joke, love. I am hot.”

You scoffed at the term of endearment, suddenly aware of his scent now that he was so close to you, “and egoistic too,” you helpfully added. 

“Rightfully so.”

Your childish argument was interrupted that very second as the door to Jake’s room swung open, revealing the exact man you came to see. 

Jaehyun was smiling, dressed in black slacks and a button up shirt as he welcomed you here, and you were quick to notice Jake’s mood turning fowl that very second. 

“Thank you so much for coming here, Y/N. Let me send a few snacks and drinks for you both while you study,” he smiled, and you rushed up to stand, not even bothering about the pen that fell down as you did so. 

“Jaehyun,” you walked up to him, much to Jake’s dismay, “oh, you don’t have to do anything,” you smiled sweetly, and he only shook his head softly, grabbing your arm. 

“Don’t worry about it, just sit and relax, okay?” He squeezed your arm, going downstairs and you sighed with a smile. Even his scent was perfect to you. 

“You done daydreaming?” Jake asked, deadpanning once his brother had left. 

“You done solving the question?” You retorted. 

He sighed, as if his energy was drained already, “yeah, just check and get this over with,” he said, handing you the binder and looking elsewhere. 

It was probably the first time you actually paid attention to his dejected tone, as if he didn’t have the energy to fight back, and you obviously didn’t wish to irk him more, especially when he looked so frustrated right now. Thankfully, a lot of his answers were indeed correct, which was another surprise to you. 

He was smart, he just simply didn’t wish to study. 

“Something wrong?” He asked, cocking his brow and you blinked, “you’re actually not as dumb as you portray yourself to be,” you mumbled, checking everything thoroughly. 

It should’ve been insulting to Jake per se, but even the slightest amount of approval was a big thing for him, causing the corner of his lips to curl up. He felt insane, the amount of emotions he felt in a single day was perhaps the reason for the same, courtesy of you. 

He was glad Jaehyun didn’t enter the room again, sending in a servant staff to give you the snacks instead, which maintained the peace throughout the session. 

You couldn’t help but notice how well he concentrated once there was silence in the room, your eyes focused on his hand gripping the pen, making it seem more veiny than it already was. 

Also, you didn’t miss the hint of a smile ghosting his face when you told him he did a good job right before leaving, which made you think of a few things, one being— 

He looked beautiful with a smile. 

Chapter 4: You can’t read my mind, so read my lips. 

As much as Jake loved the comfort of his room, he really wanted to avoid you bumping into Jaehyun again.

Even the thought of your interactions, your fake sweet smiles, made him wanna punch the wall. Jaehyun really had it easy and Jake never understood why, it was no joke that Jake was decent looking as well, talented in his own way, and a kind hearted person who just happened to have a protective wall around him so as to not get hurt any further. 

Which is why you had been tutoring him in the library from the past ten sessions, his own personal request to avoid having privacy with you. 

Heck, even Jake didn’t know it was his own mind trying to protect him, which is why he couldn’t let anyone in, anyone.  

Which made this situation far from ideal as he had you pressed against the library wall, no distance between you both as you closed your eyes in pure distress. 

“What the actual fuck is he doing here?” Your question was directed more to yourself, which confused Jake further.

He poked his tongue into his cheek, annoyance creeping through, “what the fuck is going on?” He asked. 

“Shhh, not so loud,” you pressed your palm against his mouth, “just hide me.”

He rolled his eyes, grabbing your wrist effortlessly, pinning it above your head, “you don’t tell me what to do, yeah?” He mumbled, flustering you under his gaze before your eyes travelled back to where you were looking initially. 

He sighed in annoyance, looking back at the direction of your supposed fear. 

Lee Heeseung. Another of Jake’s football teammates. 

“Why are you hiding from Heeseung,” he asked, brow raised as he leaned into you. 

“Ugh,” you groaned, “he’s my ex, he shouldn’t even be in the library, he’s never here!” You were stressed and Jake smirked devilishly. 

“Fucking hell, you’re the girl he keeps on stalking and crying about?” He chuckled, “let me call him,” he turned away for a second. 

You used your free hand to grab his nape, “don’t fucking move,” you mumbled. 

Perhaps you were too harsh with the grabbing, also not calculating the proximity enough, because Jake’s nose was brushing against yours, lips close to the point of touching, and a low groan escaping his lips as your name rolls out his tongue in the most angry grunt ever, “what the actual fuck are you doing?” 

“J—just let him leave,” you mumbled, gulping and closing your eyes, his mint breath fanning your face as heat crept up your neck, up till your ears. 

“What will I get out of it,” he asked, his free hand resting on your waist now, “why should I help you?”

“I’m literally helping you study, Jake,” you seethed out.

“Look at me when I’m talking to you,” he groaned, making you open your eyes, staring into his deep ones now, suddenly feeling small under his gaze, and well, his body. 

“What?” you asked, looking away to check if Heeseung had left, pushing Jake away the second you confirmed it. 

Jake, however, wasn’t having any of it. 

With a scoff and the shake of his head, he grabbed your wrist again, twisting it behind your back, not putting too much pressure so it just hurt but still made it clear how he would not let you go so easily, “you can’t run from me.”

“Let go, I fucking swear—” you let out, squirming around and pushing him, he didn’t budge at all sadly. 

“You do realize I’m a lot stronger than you, right?” He chuckled. 

“Fuck—what do you want me to do?” You rolled your eyes, jaw clenching as you looked at him. 

Before he could answer, your eyes widened in fear yet again as you yanked his arm so forcefully, he had no chance to balance himself, a yelp leaving his mouth as you ran and he was following right after you. 

Heeseung was back and you could just not deal with his ass anymore, hence the overwhelming response. Fight or flight? Flight for sure. Dragging Jake into it might be a stretch but hey, whatever helped you run away from the gremlin, right? 

“Y/N,” Jake hissed yet again, once you stopped by your seat, gathering both yours and his belongings scattered across the table from when you were studying a few minutes back, before getting up to find a book, before seeing Heeseung roaming around the halls of the library. 

It was quite amusing to Jake if he was being honest, a mix of feelings as you grabbed his wrist effortlessly yet again, your eyes set on the exit door leading to the parking lot where Jake’s Ferrari Purosangue stood proudly. 

“Get in!” You screamed even though you were far from the threat (read: Heeseung) now. 

“That’s my car in case you forgot—”

“Now.” 

“So fucking annoying—” He grumbled, with a small smile playing on his lips. 

You looked so bothered as if you were chased by Ghostface and not Heeseung, even though you probably wouldn’t run away from the prior. It was comical regardless, the long breath you exhaled once you were comfortable on his premium quality car seat, head leaned back fully. 

You opened your eyes after a few seconds only to find Jake’s eyes on you, face curved into an amused look. You stared at one another for a second, two seconds, three seconds—and he burst out laughing. 

It was probably the first time you saw him laugh like that—so freely, without any care in this world. It was loud but breathless, making his eyes crinkle with small crescents forming, his perfectly aligned pearly teeth showing as he went on, laughing at your disheveled state and crazy response to everything that happened the past twenty minutes. 

You were calm and composed for the most part, it was rare for you to look this frustrated over anything, which came as a surprise to Jake, the whole situation seemingly pure comedy to him. 

You observed him so carefully, your own lips twitching into a smile and before you knew it, you were laughing alongside him so normally as if two friends were laughing over a joke. 

A weird sort of warmth spread over your body, it made no sense honestly, you were pinned to the wall just a few minutes back and Jake looked as if he’d burst into flames with his anger, and now he’s laughing at your disheveled, non-composed state. 

Once Jake caught you staring back at him with glittering eyes, and a little smile, he froze. It was easy for him to come back to his senses (read: put his walls back up) which only made your smile drop too. It was awkward, both of you looking elsewhere while clearing your throats, definitely not something you expected. 

“Uh—sorry about that, yeah,” you mumbled, playing with the loose threat of your sweater sleeve. 

“Yeah, no problem,” he retorted, turning the car engine on to start driving. 

Why was it awkward? Because you laughed together like two absolutely normal individuals? Because you had Jake pinning you to the wall to avoid your ex? 

Or because you almost kissed. Almost. 

The ride back to your apartment was silent, no songs playing in the car, just the small buzz of engine, and the nail tapping on the screen of your phone—to avoid any kind of conversation happening, also clearly missing out on how Jake glanced at you every few seconds, the speed of his thoughts running faster than his own car. 

“I’ll—see you tomorrow then?” Your voice cracked as you said so, wincing slightly at your own tone. 

Jake was about to chuckle again, yet he covered it with a low cough as he mumbled a yes, as you opened the door once he stopped in front of your apartment. 

That’s it, you were leaving, and his eyes didn’t leave you till you disappeared into the apartment. 

He gripped the steering wheel tighter, groaning as he banged his head into it, a low horn sound only frustrating him further. It was hard for him to drive after, the scene of you being so vulnerable yet glaring at him like a scared little vixen trying to look brave, replayed in his mind. 

No, he couldn’t drive, couldn’t focus on the road anymore, stopping the car at a random parking lot of a fast food chain, grabbing his phone to pull up Instagram, specifically Heeseung’s account. 

He didn’t have to scroll much to find the picture he was looking for—his teammate, Heeseung, standing right next to you with his arm resting on your waist. Jake didn’t know why that picture left a bitter taste in his mouth all of a sudden, knowing well how badly Heeseung fucked up when he cheated on you. 

And now the asshole is running after you again. 

You didn’t deserve that, you deserve someone better—someone perfect like you. 

He went back, not having it in him to look at the picture again, instead, going to your account now. It looked professional, all your posts being highly calculative to make your feed look pleasing. Your highlights, however, had this one particular picture—a picture of you smiling without a care in the world, so raw, so genuine, so beautiful. 

Beautiful. 

Jake thought you looked beautiful, and it made him angry. 

He was angry—because deep down, he desired to be the reason for your smile. 

Chapter 5: Pretty in pink, but my head’s in the dark. 

Jake made you smile. 

You did know that laugh was contagious, however, you didn’t think you’d actually give in to Jake’s sweet chuckles. 

Sleep didn’t come to you easy when the constant reminder of the study session poked the back of your mind, not to mention what happened in the library earlier, where you and Jake almost kissed—

No. 

You shook your head. Such niche experiences never falter you, so why was this such a big deal? 

Another groan left your mouth, but alas, your body was relaxed enough to sleep so you woke up energetic the next day. It felt oddly friendly when you saw Jake at the University, and he threw a two finger salute your way, you waved back before going your way. 

“You’re zoned out, again.” Karina, one of your classmates, pointed out and you sighed as she rambled about how you needed to let some guy in, quite literally, to blow off some steam, which you clearly weren’t doing, hence the stuck up energy. 

Being descriptive about it didn’t help either—yet another reminder of how Jake’s body was pressed against yours this hour, yesterday. 

Heat crept up your neck, urging you to pack up and leave the room. It was hot, stuffy almost for you to do anything, which is why you found yourself studying at the empty seat of the University park. 

You had to face him again, of course, there was no escape to that, and as if the universe was testing you, the time passed by way too quickly for your liking and soon, you found yourself standing in front of the main door of Jake’s place. 

Before you could even ring the bell, the door opened to a huffing Jake, almost as if he ran downstairs, but how did he know—

“Hey,” he whispered, looking around. 

He didn’t wait for your reply, simply grabbing your wrist and dragging you inside, your skin burning at the unexpected touch, but you didn’t shake him off of you, only asking in a low tone, “what are you doing?” 

“Shh,” Jake mumbled, as though he was trying to avoid someone, or rather, trying to hide you from someone. His efforts were futile, however, once he heard that stern voice of his mother booming through the walls of his mansion. 

Now you get why Jake was in a hurry, the look on her face had a chill going down your spine. 

You felt Jake stiffen alongside you, his hold on your wrist now tighter, uncontrollably so. 

“You must be the new tutor for Jake,” she said, scrutinizing every bit of your existence, Jake’s jaw clenched at her unwavering gaze. 

“Yes ma’am, It’s a pleasure meeting you,” you tried to say, only for her to cut you off. 

“Trust me, darling. There must be no pleasure in helping Jake, but I do hope he learns a thing or two from you—you look like a smart young lady, hopefully, a positive influence on him.” 

You looked at her with your mouth open slightly, not believing the sight in front of you. No mother should look down on their children like that, ever. 

“Mrs. Jung, I hope we’re talking about the same Jake because he is amazing at studies, he grasps concepts faster than I do, and then I believe I’m the one who’s learning from him right now!” You smiled, full of enthusiasm, feeling Jake’s hand dropping down from your wrist. 

“In fact, I’ve never seen anyone play football so perfectly while also being so brilliantly academically smart, I firmly believe his grades will shock you this time. Now, if you’ll excuse us, it’s time for our tutoring session.”

You passed her a small smile, the shock clear on her face, before grabbing Jake’s hand and taking him along with you—to his room. You didn’t look back, simply closing the door as you breathed out with a pissed expression. 

Jake’s heart was beating fast, he wasn’t sure if he had words to speak at this moment, so staring at you was all he could do. 

You spoke for him. 

You defended him. 

No one’s ever done that, no one cared enough to understand, moreover, it didn’t help how you looked angrier than him at the situation. 

“W—Why?” Jake couldn’t keep his voice in check, “you didn’t have to—say all that.”

That’s when you turned around, facing him. All your anger disappeared once you focused on his face, so vulnerable, so confused, so desperate to know your answer. 

“Jake,” the gentleness in your voice only made him gulp and look down at the floor, “I hope you don’t believe a word she says, because that’s not true,” you spoke, inching closer. 

You were not one who was good at making people feel better, Jake of all people at that, however, this gave you an insight of why Jake is the way he is—closed off, hence the lack of words from your side, but you knew you had to say it. 

That’s the thing, we judge people too quickly, you always had snarky remarks for him, not knowing how deep they cut him. He looked shaken right now, traumatized, especially because you experienced a part of his life which he never wanted to share with anybody. 

“Jake, you’re doing so well, you know that right?” You whispered, as genuine as possible, your fingers grabbing his own, which made him look up at you finally. 

He was shaken, not from his mother’s words—he was used to them—but from yours. 

“No one’s ever said that,” he spoke so silently, you almost missed it. You held his hand tight—being almost angrier than him while answering his mom back—he isn’t sure if he’ll ever be over that. 

Jake didn’t realize his eyes were glistening. 

“What?” You breathed out. 

He gulped yet again, jaw clenched now as he struggled to get his words out, the floor being the most interesting thing to him, “defended me. No one’s done that.”

“I—is that why you hate Jaehyun? Because people only see him?” You asked, wincing at the question when you saw him stiffen again, a sharp pang in your chest once he brushed your hand off of his. 

“Don’t. Don’t fucking go there.”

“I didn’t mean—” 

“Oh I fucking know what you mean. Everyone sees him fuck—you see him, because he’s perfect, right? That’s what he is, perfect,” he seethed out, “you don’t know what it’s like—to live in someone’s shadow,” there was a flash of pain in his eyes. 

You stayed mum, letting him speak. 

“Every place, every room, every fucking person just sees him,” he muttered, “I need to be better, but it’s never enough, because he already did it—Jaehyun did it better. You look at him the same way as others do, and me? The afterthought—the failure.”

Your heart broke a little, guilt settling in because unknowingly, you fueled the same anger and trauma for him. 

“Jake,” you mumbled, “you’re not a failure.”

“You don’t know me.”

“I’m starting to,” you spoke, and he looked up, “and thank god you’re not Jaehyun,” you chuckled, fingers ghosting near his jaw, your touch featherlight, making him suck in a deep breath. 

“Why?” He asked, voice barely above a whisper, eyes hopeful, which scared him. 

“Because you’re real, you don’t fake your emotions. You don’t smile at somebody who you don’t care about, you get angry, messy, you let yourself be shown how you are,” you lip twitched slightly as you said so, your own heartbeat rose at the sentences you so easily uttered, “that’s what makes you a human, Jake, a human who’s trying his best, which is what matters.”

He blinked. 

He wanted to speak, but he couldn’t, simply leaning into your touch with his eyes closed. 

“You’re you, the stupid jock who’s not scared of anything, yeah?” You tried to make him smile, which helped as you saw his lips curving up. 

Midway through your sentences, you genuinely questioned yourself about why you even like Jaehyun, it was honestly just your mind playing games with you. 

“You scare me,” he muttered. 

“Why?”

“Because you say things so convincingly, it makes me wanna believe you.”

“Then why don’t you?”

“Just—don’t say it when you don’t mean it.”

“I do,” you said in a breath, his eyes on yours now, more intense than ever, “I mean every word.”

He stared a little longer, staring at you unamused as if you’d laugh in his face right this second. You didn’t. 

“You’re serious,” he said, voice hoarse. 

You nodded softly. 

Jake took a single step forward, the air around you so tight, it felt like a rubber band stretched to its max, on the verge of snapping back. 

You inhaled sharply once Jake’s cold hand brushed the hair on your shoulder, grazing against your bare skin, moving up your nape. 

“Do you have any idea what you just said to me?” He murmured, eyes locked on yours, turning you around easily to pin you against the wall—something he liked to do, apparently. 

“Tell me,” you mumbled. 

If someone told you two days back that you’d be in Jake’s room, calming him down before getting into a compromising position with him, you would have laughed in their faces. It was reality for you now, something that made you feel so unconventionally flustered. 

The way he brushed his thumb along your jaw, slow and deliberate, made you shiver, “you’re making me forget that i’m supposed to hate this—feeling anything.” 

You were hanging on the last bit of your sanity, drowning in Jake’s scent, his nose brushing against your cheek, hand gripping your waist, heat radiating off of your body. 

“Jake—”

“Say it again,” he whispered. 

“Say what?” You breathed. 

“That you’re glad I’m not him.”

You chuckled under his hold, your voice still shaking, “I’m so glad—so fucking glad you’re not him.” 

His breath sounded like a curse, lips hovering a breath above yours, you could feel his hesitation against your skin. He wasn’t sure if he had the right to touch someone as perfect as you, yet you didn’t stop him, the space in between you was so tight, it might as well elicit electricity. 

You couldn’t breathe, couldn’t blink, only leaning into his touch, resting your hand over the top of his on your jaw. The touch was faint, yet you could feel it everywhere. 

You held your breath as he leaned in—

Knock. 

Jake swore under his breath as you flinched, it physically hurt him to step back. 

“Jake?” Of course, it was Jaehyun who had to interrupt you two. 

Your hands trembled as Jake moved to the door, and you quickly turned towards the desk, rushing to sit down, pretending that nothing had happened—that you didn’t almost kiss Jake a few seconds back. 

“Fuck,” he muttered, eyes furious with a hint of daze in them. “Yeah?” His voice came out strained as he asked Jaehyun through the door. 

“Mom wants to talk to you,” He said.

“Be right down,” he answered, shaking his head, staring at your way one last time, holding eye contact for a second, letting you see just how much he hated this situation, veins popping in his neck.

Then he opened the door, closing it behind him and disappearing from your eyesight. 

You stayed there, overwhelmed, lips tingling, pulse racing. 

A truth burned your skin in an excruciating pain. 

If he had kissed you, you wouldn’t have stopped him. 

Chapter 6: I can go from A to Z, but U is what I want. 

Jake hadn’t texted you all night. 

Not that you waited, except, you did. 

He never came back to the room after Jaehyun called him out, you waited, till you couldn’t anymore and had to rush out before your mind drove you to the edge of insanity. 

So you grabbed your bag, rushing to the first place you thought of—the courtyard behind the Science block. It was calm, no student in sight, thankfully. 

Your five minutes of calm ended a second too quickly, a voice calling out your name in its full glory. You cursed the universe for treating you like this and you didn’t have to turn around to figure out who it was.

Heeseung. 

“I gotta admit, I didn’t peg you to fall for the broken type.” He stepped out smiling as insane as a villain who hasn’t moved on does. 

“Still stalking me?” You rolled your eyes, “get a fucking job.”

“I call it being invested,” he smirked, shoving hands in his pockets, “it’s honestly a downgrade, going from me to Jake.”

“Not again,” you muttered, grabbing your book which you had just taken out. 

“I mean, trading me for Jake?” Voice full of pity. 

“As if you were an option, Heeseung,” you turned sharply. 

That shut him up for half a second.

“I just don’t get it,” he said, voice colder now. “He’s always angry, I was angry, I made you feel something, can he say the same?”

Your head was hurting by now, as you mumbled yet another shut up, only to be stopped by Heeseung as he grabbed your arm. 

“What? He’s the angry, tortured type. You’re into hopeless projects now?”

“I’m into honesty,” you snapped, “something you don’t offer.”

“What does he have that I don’t?”

“Self awareness maybe,” a voice came from behind you, low, cold, almost lethal. 

Jake was here. 

“Let go of her,” he said, dead-eyed, he was ready to snap. 

And Heeseung did, a scoff leaving his mouth before he smirked, “great, speak of the devil.”

Jake raised his brow, “you done?”

Heeseung chuckled, “not even close.”

You sighed, “of course not,” this day couldn’t get worse. 

“You really think this is love or whatever?” He said, looking at Jake but his words were directed to you instead, “he’s gonna burn you someday, and you’re gonna let him.” 

Oh god, you were not having any of this, why was this conversation even happening? It made absolutely no sense. 

Jake moved faster this time, but you blocked his chest with your arms, “enough,” you said sharply. 

“Ask him to leave.” Jake said, voice low. 

“Heeseung, just leave,” you said, turning to him. 

But he didn’t, and so Jake did, shoving past you as you rolled your eyes, Heeseung’s sinister smile only widening, getting so close to him, he had to lean back slightly. 

“Don’t test me, and don’t come near her again, or else I won’t be this patient.” Jake spoke. 

“Aw? You’re gonna hit me in front of her, Jake?”

“I don’t need to, she already cut you deeper than I ever could.” 

Heeseung stilled once, clenching his jaw, before turning to you, maintaining eye contact, “she’s not your girl, Jake.”

“You don’t know that,” he gritted his teeth. 

“You’ll come back,” Heeseung’s jaw ticked as he said so. 

“Hold your breath until I do,” you replied.

That was it, he left. It wasn’t silent, nor dramatic, but with enough tension to let you know that he will be coming back. 

Once he was gone, you shoved Jake, hard. 

“The fuck was that?”

“What? I came here trying to find you, only to witness you talking to him.”

“I didn’t want it to happen either, but the world hates me,” you mumbled, grabbing your bag and walking away with Jake following you behind. 

“I fucking hate that he still gets to talk to you, why does he have access to you?” His voice rose and you prayed no one would hear him, thankfully this area was empty. 

“He doesn’t, and why do you even care?” You asked, with distress clear on your face, “pretending like I mean something to you in front of Heeseung is just as worse, Jake.” 

“I—”

“No, you won’t even talk about last night, as if it didn’t happen,” you snapped and he froze, “you didn’t even come back to your room.”

His silence was your answer, and you knew this conversation wasn’t gonna go any further, Jake couldn’t do that—he was scared of opening up, and he was scared of answering those questions, so even though you were hurting on the inside, you let him be. 

“Tomorrow, library, at five. Be on time.” You mumbled, leaving him behind you. 

“Fuck—fuck!” Jake punched the wall next to him. He didn’t want you to go—the first person who ever tried to understand him, took his side, defended him. He was beyond scared of letting his guard down, so he groaned, sliding down the wall. 

“How do I even tell you I want you?”

Chapter 7: I know that I’m hard to read, but you got me here to stay. 

The library was too quiet for how loud your mind was. The sound of your pen dragging across the paper felt almost intrusive as you tried to finish your assignment. 

It had been three nights since the library fiasco. 

Two nights since the almost kiss. 

One night since the blow up with Heeseung.

You almost didn’t wish to come here, yet here you were, with the sample test papers ready, clad in your little black skirt, a cardigan too loose for you, waiting for Jake to show up—hoping he would. 

The clock ticked. He was a solid nineteen minutes late now, another minute and you’ll get up to leave. That’s when you heard the lazy footsteps approaching your side, the farthest corner of the library. You expected him to sit in front of you, yet he opted to sit right next to you, so close you could feel the fabric of his jeans brushing against your thigh. He took a seat without permission, like he had the right to be, like nothing had happened. 

He came in like guilt personified, shoulders hunched, hoodie loose, hair an unbrushed mess of indecision. And when he saw you?

He hesitated.

You didn’t look up, simply sliding him the sheet of questions to solve, the air around you turned weighted. His pen scratched, your leg bounced, you sipped water and he watched the corner of your mouth, practically burning holes into you. 

It was unbearable. 

This tension—it’s not a war but there’s rarely ever any peace. Catherine and Heathcliff reincarnated, except you weren’t on a moor, you were in a library, trying not to fall apart across the wooden study table. 

Just yesterday, he burned through Heeseung like jealousy was oxygen. 

He couldn’t stop staring, yet he solved the questions for forty minutes, sliding the sheet back to you for checking, expecting some sort of conversation now, anything, even a little hum of acknowledgement from your side, but none of it happened. 

He watched you scribble your pen over the margin, circling a few things, ticking the others, lip bitten in concentration. He observed you so intensely, how your eyes flicked across his answer sheet, but you didn’t look his way, not even once. 

“You won’t even talk to me now?” He asked, keeping his voice in check. 

“Four answers wrong, you did pretty well, can do better still,” you mumbled, passing him the paper. 

“Y/N,” he sighed, tired, he was afraid of this happening—letting you down, and that’s exactly what he did. Running away from his problems was what Jake always did, he wasn’t perfect, he knows it, but he wants to try and be better, better for you. 

“You came late,” you said, still not looking up. 

“I didn’t sleep last night,” he exhaled, jaw clenched as if trying to control his words.  

“Not my problem,” you retorted. 

“I was thinking.”

“You should study instead.”

“You hate me now, huh?” Jake leaned forward, voice flat. 

You blinked. The question hit out of nowhere.

“I don’t hate you,” you replied carefully. “But I don’t know how to deal with you either.”

“That’s not an answer.”

“No, Jake. It’s the truth. And that’s more than you’ve been giving me.”

He looked at you then, really looked—eyes narrowed, like he was keeping a war behind them, trying his best not to show his emotions. His eyes were empty, yet so full of you, you being the only person he wanted to see. 

“I don’t know how to do this,” he said, quietly. “I don’t know how to be—good at this, with you, I’ve never done this before.”

“And yet you’re good at disappearing. You’re good at leaving me hanging like none of it mattered, Jake. Even a text would have made it better, just one text.”

You weren’t yelling. You didn’t need to. Your disappointment was louder than any raised voice.

Jake sat back in his chair, breathing shallow. “You kissed me back.”

Your throat tightened, “you didn’t kiss me at all.”

“Exactly,” he muttered. “Because I would’ve ruined it. Ruined you.”

You shook your head slowly. “No, Jake. You didn’t kiss me because you’re scared of how much you actually want to.”

His fingers were now balled into fists. “And you’re not?”

“We’re not talking about me.” You looked away. 

He scoffed, turning to look at you fully, leaning in with his hand now resting on your thigh, burning the skin with his touch. 

“You want honesty, huh? So here it is—I’ve been thinking about you, about everything that’s happened in the past few days, no one’s ever messed with my mind so much and it fucking scares me. You’re messing me up—”

You couldn’t hear more, not when he was so close, not when he poured his heart out to you. Nothing about you two was normal, even your heartbeat was synced with how abnormally high they were. 

“Shh,” you mumbled, covering his mouth with your palm, and even the rude gesture calmed him down—your touch calmed him down. 

“You have an exam tomorrow.” You said and he stared, “study, pass the exam, and we’ll talk, yeah?”

He blinked, almost as if you showed him mercy, and gave him a chance to do something, to prove that he’s worthy of being near you. His scholarship, football, future—everything was at stake, but did he care? No. He cared about not letting you down. He wanted to prove himself to you. 

“You—you promise?” He asked, gripping the extra sheets and notes you passed his way.

You nodded, eyes softer now. You didn’t wanna hurt Jake, you could see just how hard he tried to fight with his demons, but this time, you wanted him to win.

“I’ll be waiting.” 

You turned to leave then, leaving Jake with his thoughts as he watched you leave, eyes on your legs. He gulped, looking back to the paper to find a line scribbled in your handwriting. 

You already know the answer, you’re just afraid of getting it wrong. 

It wasn’t about the question, it was about him. 

He just wanted to be worthy enough to stand in front of you and say I didn’t fuck this up this time. So he started, he worked all night, solved as many sample problems as he could, everything felt like a punch in the gut but he couldn’t give up, not this time. 

Jake couldn’t sleep at night, 

I’ll be waiting. 

That’s what you told him, and he was looking forward to it, because for the very first time in his life, someone wasn’t waiting for him to fail. 

He woke up before his alarm had the chance to ring, didn’t care about his mother’s remark on how he woke up on time for once, or how Jaehyun gave him a long, unreadable look. Jake didn’t react, he had bigger problems to tackle today. 

You were just as restless as him if not more, checking your phone every few minutes as if you’d get any text from Jake. He must be busy studying, you hope that was the case. 

He walked into the exam hall calm, focused, terrified. He didn’t skip questions. He didn’t zone out.

He solved the final problem two minutes before time and rechecked every line like his life was hidden in the margins.

When he walked out of that room, his shirt clinging to the back of his neck from sweat, his palms aching from gripping the pen too hard—he knew. He’d done it. Or at least, he hoped he did. 

Yet, he didn’t text you, he wouldn’t until he got the results. 

Chapter 8: Jealousy is but a red thread around my throat. 

You waited, not loud, but silently. 

Two whole days, you held your breath, even planned on visiting the football practice to just get a glimpse of Jake, yet you couldn’t muster enough courage to do so. God, you were so affected by everything he did, and this felt so very suffocating, waiting on someone. You knew what you felt, there was no point in denying it, however, you couldn’t figure out how it happened, so quickly at that. 

Heck, even Jaemin was more present in your chat inbox, even though you never replied to him, it just made you wonder if your time with Jake was just a hoax. 

Did you imagine it all? 

On the other hand, on the other side of the city, sitting in a dim room with sunlight pouring in, Jake was drowning in darkness. 

The exam portal was open in front of him, he refreshed the page every two seconds, not being able to sit still. His hands were shaking, not from fear but from want.  From the feeling of your voice telling him that you’ll talk to him once he proves himself. 

He gave up the wait, the result wasn’t out the whole day. It was three in the morning when the notification woke him up like a jolt. 

Results were out. 

He rushed to check it, the numbers stunning him as his jaw hung open. 

83%

Not perfect. But more than enough.

Enough to pass. Enough to stay on the team.

Enough to say, Look. I did it. I’m not a fuck-up. The first thing he thought of was you. So he typed—just two words.

Jake: I passed.

Because he didn’t know how to say what he really wanted to—I passed, and all I could think about was your voice. I passed, and I still don’t feel whole unless you tell me you’re proud. I passed, and it’s not enough if I can’t show you.

Your reply came back six minutes later.

You: I knew you would. 

It was soft, gentle. But was it enough for Jake? No. It should’ve been enough, but it wasn’t. 

He didn’t reply, he didn’t text you again. He opted to skip the lectures for the day and stay in his room, blinds closed, only darkness consuming him. 

You knew it was hard for Jake, you knew you shouldn’t wait for his reply or him approaching you—he was too scared to do that, which is exactly why you grabbed your bag and went to his place the first thing in the morning. Maybe Jake needed time, but you had to check. 

You rang the bell, your heart pounding as you did so, expecting Jake to open up and see you. Once the door opened, your pulse stuttered. 

Jaehyun. 

Of course, it had to be him. 

“Y/N,” he said your name smoothly, “didn’t know you were coming by.”

You hesitated with a small chuckle, exhaling the breath you were holding, “is Jake home?” 

He nodded, stepping aside to let you in, “yeah, he’s in his room, didn’t come out this morning at all.”

“Oh,” you said softly, wondering if he was alright. 

There was a pause, an awkward silence after that, you felt heavy, wanting to go upstairs but you weren’t sure if you were allowed to. 

Jaehyun closed the door behind you. “He’s been off since the results,” he said, voice low. “I thought passing would help, but I don’t know. He kind of shut down again after telling us he passed.”

You gulped, chest tightened at the revelation. 

“I came to check up on him, I’m not sure if he wants to meet though.”

“He’d want to see you.” Jaehyun said, smiling sincerely, “you’re good for him.”

Your eyes widened at that, “I’m not sure he thinks that.” You tried to smile, “can I go to his room?”

“He locked the door, I think he’s sleeping,” Jaehyun said apologetically. 

“I don’t wanna bother him.” You smiled sadly, “those are good pictures,” you mumbled, looking at the wall full of frames, particularly the ones with Jake in them.

“Yeah, I took most of those,” Jaehyun replied with another smile, he knew you wanted to talk to Jake so he suggested something, “Maybe if you take him something to eat? I can give the breakfast he skipped—”

“Oh no, I can run to the bakery and get something—”

Then you noticed a movement in your peripheral vision, you turned around to find Jake. He was standing down the hall, his fluffy hair a mess, eyes wide as if he didn’t expect you to be here—especially with Jaehyun. 

“Hey,” you breathed out. 

No reply. 

“Y—you didn’t reply, I came to see you,” you tried speaking again. 

However, his expression didn’t change and suddenly, you felt like you shouldn’t have come here at all. He was frozen even when you said you wanted to make sure he was okay. Then he came back to his senses, clearing his throat. 

Jaehyun left the room, letting you two be alone. 

“Why didn’t you ask for me?” He whispered, just sadness in his voice. 

“I did, that’s what I came for,” you tried to explain.

Jake stared at you, he was so broken inside he couldn’t let himself believe it. You dressed up, all pretty, your eyes so soft, your lips turning into a pout of disappointment. You looked perfect, and you came here for Jake? He just could not believe it. 

“You were talking to him,” Jake said, referring to Jaehyun, his voice broken. 

“He opened the door, what can I do?” You shook your head, trying to explain, “you didn’t even text back, Jake.”

“I don’t know what to say,” he replied, “I’ve never done this before, I’ve never had someone wait for me and mean it.”

Your lips parted to reply but he wasn’t done. 

“You said you’d talk to me after the exam,” he went on, voice sharper now, “but when you showed up, you let him open the door. You let him tell you how I was.”

“I didn’t—” your voice faltered, “I didn’t come for him.”

“Didn’t look that way.”

That hurt. You flinched. “Jake, why are you doing this?” 

“Because I waited for you,” he snapped. “I sat in that room like a fucking idiot thinking you’d come to see me. Not make small talk with my brother or compliment his photography.”

“You heard that?” You froze, it wasn’t your intention to do any of that. 

“I heard everything, every second you spent without taking my name,” he said. 

Just like that—he hurt you. Every conversation was about Jake, every single one. He just couldn’t see it. 

“I thought I was getting better,” he admitted, quieter now. “I thought passing the exam would mean something. That it would be enough.”

“It was,” you whispered. “Jake, it is. I am proud of you.”

“Then why didn’t it feel like it?” His voice broke on that line. He ran a hand through his hair, pacing a step away, then back, like his own body was a prison.

You stood frozen. Every word hit somewhere different.

“I wanted you to come,” he said, softer now. “Not to check in. Not to ask if I’d eaten. I wanted you to come for me. Just for me. You don’t get it, Y/N.”

“No,” you stepped forward. “You don’t get it. You think everything is about being chosen or abandoned. But not everyone’s trying to leave you, Jake. Sometimes people show up. But you keep slamming the door in their face.”

He turned away. “Then go.”

“I came for you.” You said one last time, your eyes watering, not being able to contain the hurt you held in them. 

“Well, maybe you shouldn’t have.”

That one landed like a punch.

Your mouth opened. Then closed. You nodded. Just once.

“Fine.”

You turned.

And you left.

And this time, he didn’t stop you.

Chapter 9: I know that I’m hard to read, but you got me here to stay 

You spent most of your morning crying alone in your student council room, but it just wasn’t enough, not when you were being wronged every second of the day, not when the person you wanted kept running away from you no matter how hard you tried. At least you did. 

You couldn’t run away though, you had an important meeting with your council at six in the evening, by that time, you had done everything to make yourself look normal again, but your mind was entirely elsewhere, in another realm, a realm where things were different. 

Jake, on the other hand, left his room as soon as he realized how wrong everything had gone. All afternoon his own words replayed in his mind, how he asked you to leave and how you left a single tear drop on the floor before you turned around and left. 

Maybe you shouldn’t have.

It felt like biting into something rotten, saying that out loud to you. Like watching the one and the only thing he wanted turn and walk away. You didn’t yell back, you didn’t beg, you went still, and left. He saw you leave—he made you leave. 

And he let you go anyway. Because that’s what he did. Because pushing people away was easier than asking them to stay.

Until now.

Now he was pacing in his room like a caged animal, hoodie still damp, heart in his throat. He kept hearing your voice in the hallway. Kept seeing your face. Kept remembering the way you reached for him and he didn’t reach back.

His chest felt tight, his limbs tense. He couldn’t stay here, not in this house, not knowing you might never come back.

He had to find you.

So he ran. He ran to the courtyard, not caring about the rain pour, soaking him up from head to toe. You weren’t in the library, not in the council room, the classrooms were empty. He was panicking. 

That’s when he heard a voice, turning around the corner of the athletic department, he walked straight into one of his football teammates he couldn’t stand at all—Minjae, a loud-mouthed asshole, smiling like a madman. 

“Fucking hell, Lee Jake, you look like shit.” He grinned. 

Jake didn’t answer, he was in a hurry, he had to find you, to make things right with you, he was about to push past Minjae when—

“Oh, by the way,” he smirked, “Heeseung told us a lot about how you finally landed his ex, the pretty goody two shoes, Y/N.”

Jake froze, jaw clenched at the mention of you and Heeseung in the same sentence, coming from an asshole at that. 

“Didn’t think you’d have a go at someone like her. She seems to like guys who have more brains than biceps.” He laughed at his own joke. 

“The fuck did you just say?” 

Minjae laughed. “Chill, man. I’m just saying—props to you, seriously. Girl like that? All polished and pretty and loyal? I mean, not that it’ll last. Girls like that don’t stay with guys like us. She’ll figure it out eventually.”

Jake’s vision turned black.

“Say that again,” he said, voice like static.

Minjae raised his hands. “Relax. You don’t need to get all—”

The punch landed before he could finish.

Minjae hit the ground hard, water splashing up from the impact, the rain pouring down heavier now. He tried to shove Jake back, but to no avail as he bent down, his fist colliding with Minjae’s jaw again.  

Jake wasn’t fighting Minjae per se, he was fighting every single voice that told him he wasn’t enough, that he could never live up to his brother, that he could never be with someone as perfect as you. That’s what he believed too, till you actually became real for him. 

His mind was elsewhere when he took a blow to his jaw, lip bleeding now, Jake stumbled but scoffed before punching him again, and again, till his knuckles were shredded, a throbbing in his jaw which almost felt like fire. 

It was only when someone pulled him off of Minjae, Jake stopped, spitting out blood in the rain slick grass. Everything hurt, but not as much as his burning chest. 

“Are you insane?” Someone yelled his way, “what the fuck is wrong with you?”

Jake didn’t bother answering, pulling out his phone and rushing away, typing out texts to you. 

Jake: where are you? please say something i’m so fucking sorry Y/N i didn’t mean it  i didn’t mean any of it i swear Y/N please 

No response. His messages were just there, unread, and unanswered. He simply didn’t know why. 

He didn’t know how you had been in the private meeting room for the past hour, student council prep being a whole scheduling disaster, handling arguments about clubs and their out-of-the-worldly budget demands. 

You were half awake at best, distracted by the storm that brewed outside. Your phone vibrates once, then again, and when you finally pull it out to check the numerous missed calls—your screen goes dark. Perfect, just on the day you didn’t bring your charger or powerbank. 

The feeling in your gut—it wasn’t good, which is why you excused yourself mid meeting, something you never do, to rush back home. You were soaked as you ran to your apartment, close to the University, thankfully. You plugged your phone in to charge as you rushed to take a shower, hoping the hot water would soothe your nerves. It didn’t. 

You kept thinking about Jake, about the fight at his place earlier, how he asked you to leave with the saddest look in his eyes, and how badly it hurt you. You were out of the shower in fifteen minutes, toweling your hair with one hand and rushing to check your phone with the other, not expecting a myriad of notifications. 

17 Missed calls. 

6 Voicemails. 

26 Unread texts. 

The last of which made your blood run cold. 

Jake: Y/N please  i’m outside 

You rushed to the front door, and he was there—leaning against the wall beside your entrance, hoodie clinging to him, hair wet and plastered to his forehead, eyes closed and him wincing like he couldn’t hold himself up anymore. Like it hurts too much to exist. Hands bruised, lip split, and he opened his eyes—bloodshot, glassy. 

“Jake,” you gasped out loud, “w—what happened?” You said, going close to him. 

“I tried to find you,” he said, voice wrecked, “I tried but I couldn’t, I thought that maybe you blocked me.”

“No—I was in a meeting and my phone died, god I’m so sorry—fuck, come inside.” You shook your head in distress.

“Y/N,” he groaned, and you gently helped him when he didn’t move, like he wasn’t allowed to, “I fucked up.”

“Shh, come inside, it’s cold,” you whispered and he nodded after a moment of hesitation. You tried to be calm, you tried to take control of the situation for once and he listened, this time he did when you took him to your room. 

You didn’t ask how this happened to him, only guiding him to the bathroom, “you’re soaked and bleeding, take a shower, i’ll put your clothes in the wash and dryer.”

He opened his mouth to say otherwise, but you didn’t let him, grabbing a fresh towel and handing it to him. 

“Are you sure you want me here?” He asked, vulnerable. 

“I wouldn’t have opened the door otherwise, Jake, I do.”

He nodded, swallowing hard as he disappeared into the bathroom without another word and you worked your washing machine and dryer, sitting down right after, exhaling and letting your guard down, hands shaking with worry. 

You were glad Jake was taking his sweet time inside, because you had no clue how to go on with this situation. Jake stalling coming out simply because he was ashamed, also consumed in how good your shampoo smells. He was at your place, in your bathroom, all bloodied up, why? Because he couldn’t be normal for once and let you in. 

His walls came crashing down each time you came closer to him, but this time, he didn’t want them to go back up the second he touched you, this time, he wanted you inside with him. 

His clothes were dry very soon and you kept them in your room, waiting outside by the sofa, letting him come out all dressed up. The water stopped soon, the door creaking as he came out, and you were sitting on the sofa, hair still wet. 

Then Jake opened the door, you stood up at the noise, and he looked your way in a silent plea to ask you if he could sit next to you, and you nodded. He held up the bloodied towel, “I’m sorry,” he whispered, and you smiled softly, taking it away from him. 

The silence was too loud after as you both sat next to each other, you waited for him to say something, waited for the reality of tonight to settle in—to make sense, to stop trembling beneath your skin. And then he spoke as you took out your medicine kit, gently grabbing his hand to take a look at his bruised knuckles. 

“Y/N,” he took your name as if it was the only thing he knew. 

He watched you kneel in front of him, your eyes not angry, just steady, quiet, and unbearably kind. His fingers trembled in yours, you gently pulled the sleeve back, pressing a warm damp cloth to the wounds, making him wince slightly at the contact. 

“Sorry,” you breathed out. 

“I deserve worse,” he breathed back. 

“No, you don’t,” you said, looking up at him. 

He laughed under his breath, “why are you so kind to me? I don’t deserve it, Y/N.”

“You don’t get to decide what I give you, Jake,” you replied, “you’re bleeding, again.”

“Not my first time.”

You gripped him tighter, “and that’s supposed to make it better?”

“No,” he said, voice low, “just means I’m good at it by now.”

You didn’t answer. Just ripped the antiseptic packet open a little more forcefully than necessary and pressed it to the bruised line of his knuckles. He flinched.

“Good,” you muttered. “Means you still feel something.”

“God, Y/N—”

“No,” you snapped, trying your best to act normal but you both were far from that, “not yet.”

You cleaned the split in his skin with the kind of precision that only comes from anger—controlled, careful, but deeply furious.

“You don’t get to act like none of this mattered,” you said, eyes locked on his wounds. “You don’t get to disappear into your guilt and then show up bleeding and say I didn’t know where else to go. That’s not enough.”

His jaw clenched. “I didn’t come for a reward.”

“Good,” you said coldly. “Because you’re not getting one.” You wrapped gauze around his hand slowly, tight enough that it would sting.

He didn’t pull away.

“I came because I thought I’d lose you,” he said through his teeth, “I came because I’m fucking terrified that I already did.”

“Who’s fault is that?” You said, standing up, “you keep doing this thing, you pull me in, let me see you and then the very second it gets real, you shut the door in my face.”

“I know,” he said. Loud. Frustrated. “You think I don’t know that? You think I don’t see the way you look at me when I say the wrong thing? Like you’re trying so fucking hard not to walk away?”

“You told me to go!”

“I didn’t mean it!”

“Then don’t say it!” You shouted, “don’t look at me like I’m everything one second and then act like I mean nothing the next!”

“I didn’t think you’d stay.”

“I stayed!”

You were both breathing hard now. Staring at each other like you didn’t know whether to cry or kiss or throw something, You still stood in between Jake’s legs, him looking up at you.  Jake ran a hand through his damp hair, pacing a few feet before turning back to you, eyes wide and glassy.

“I ruin things,” he said, “I always have. I don’t know how to love something without fucking it up. But I wanted you anyway—I still do.”

Your throat tightened. “And I’m supposed to what? Carry all of that? Be your exception?”

“No,” he said, stepping closer. “I just need you to see that I’m trying. Even if it’s ugly. Even if I’m bleeding and loud and afraid. I need you to see me, and stay anyway.”

You stared at him.

He looked like someone who hadn’t slept in days. Someone who’d gone through hell and walked straight into another fire because you were at the center of it.

Your voice cracked, “you don’t make it easy.”

“I know.”

You looked down at your hands—his blood still faintly on your fingertips. He reached out slowly. You didn’t move. Not when his fingers curled around your wrist. Not when he pulled you in his lap, not when his forehead leaned into yours like he was holding on for dear life.

“I hate that I hurt you,” he whispered. “But I’d rather burn with you than freeze without you.”

“I wasn’t gonna leave, Jake.”

“I know.”

“Then why—”

“Because I’m sick,” he said suddenly. “Sick of being the one who’s always too much. Too angry. Too wrong. I get one thing right—one fucking exam—and even then I screw it up by throwing a punch at someone who talks shit about you and then picking a fight with the only person who’s ever actually looked at me like I could be more.”

Your breath hitched. You grabbed the gauze, wrapped it around his hand. Tighter than needed.

“Then be more, Jake.”

He stared at you.

“Be more,” you repeated, “because I’m tired of being in love with someone who’s so determined to hate himself.”

That silenced him. Fully. Until he spoke again.

“You’re in love with me?”

The words dropped like a bomb between you.

You froze. Swallowed. Refused to take it back, chuckling to yourself at how easily you let go and told him that, “yeah—god help me, I am.”

Then you tried to move back, only his arms wrapped around your waist tighter, holding you in place, “you don’t get to say that and walk away.” He growled. 

“Who said I’m walking away?” You mumbled, holding onto his shoulder for support. 

It was unreal, how close you guys were but still not close enough, it was never enough. 

“You’re mad at me,” Jake stated. 

“I should be mad.” 

“I’m mad too,” he added. 

“Good,” you rolled your eyes, trying to move again.

But he didn’t let you, not this time, his thumb brushing your cheek. 

That was it. That was when Jake finally let go. He couldn’t delay this anymore, not again, not when you were right in front of him, not when your soft lips brushed so tenderly against his bruised ones, not when you told him you were in love with him—not when he knew he had to have you. 

He surged up and into you—hands gripping your face, mouth pressing against yours like it was the only way to breathe. It wasn’t gentle, it wasn’t neat, it was everything you’d been holding back.

Lips slotted together, you could taste blood on your tongue from where he was hurt before, which only made you groan into the kiss, he was frustrated, so frustrated, not having it in him to let go for even a second. 

You gasped, arms flying up to clutch at his shoulders, pressed chest-to-chest, his body was warm—too warm—and you could feel his tension in every line.

You broke the kiss first, panting, eyes wide. “You shouldn’t—” you tried to say, especially when his body was hurting. 

“I have to,” he breathed, leaning in again. “Let me, just once. Please.”

You didn’t stop him, grabbing his nape and pulling him into you once again, because when Jake kissed you again, it felt like pain, penance, and pleasure all in one. It was as if he was trying to earn your forgiveness with his mouth, trying to pour out everything he couldn’t say to you, groaning into your mouth when your hips shifted over his lap. 

“I fucking—” He said midway the kiss, “god I—”

You shushed him gently, “you don’t have to say it.”

“I love you,” he breathed out, forehead pressed against yours, eyes earnest and full of life for the first time since you saw him, “I don’t care if it’s too early, I can’t fucking not say it, I love you, I—”

Before he could ruin the moment with the spiral in his throat, before he could pull back in fear, you pressed your lips against his like it was the only thing anchoring you to the earth.

He responded like he’d been starving. Mouth hot, desperate, hands gripping your waist like the world was falling apart and he only had seconds left to memorize you. The kiss was brutal in the way it made you feel, there was no choreography to it, no elegance—just lips, teeth, breath, and aching hunger.

His mouth was swollen. Your lips, bruised from how much he kissed you like he didn’t know how to stop.

“Tell me to stop,” he breathed.

You stared at him. “I don’t want you to.”

Then you grabbed his jaw once you heard him wince, “does it hurt?” You asked, pecking his jaw, trailing kisses all over. 

“It’s the only thing that doesn’t hurt,” he whispered, letting your lips take over, tracing every bit of his face and neck, his eyes closing with the fire that you ignited within him. 

“This feels like a dream,” he whispered.

“It’s not.”

“But it could be,” he added, almost to himself. “You—like this, in my lap, in your apartment, touching me like I’m not a monster.”

You cupped his face again, guiding his eyes to yours, “you’re not a monster, Jake.”

“You don’t know the things I’ve thought.”

“Then tell me.”

His voice cracked, “I thought I’d die if I didn’t see you again. I thought that maybe I’m already ruined and maybe I don’t deserve you but I can’t stop loving you anyway. I thought—”

You kissed him again. Slow this time. Deep and aching, “then stop thinking,” you whispered, “just be here—with me.”

His fingers trembled as they curled into the hem of your shirt.

“Can I?”

You nodded.

He pulled the fabric up carefully, reverently, and you helped him, raising your arms until it was off. His breath hitched. Not because of how you looked—but because he was looking at you like that.

Like something sacred.

You grabbed the back of his hoodie, tugging. He hesitated for a split second before pulling it over his head. The sight made your breath catch.

His torso was littered with bruises, some dark purple, some already fading yellow. His ribcage dipped where the muscle was taut with tension. You reached out, fingertips grazing over a particularly harsh mark near his side.

He flinched. “That one’s from earlier.”

Your jaw clenched, “you shouldn’t fight because of me.”

“I wasn’t,” he said, “I was fighting every voice in my head that said I wasn’t worth your love.”

You kissed the bruise.

He gasped.

“I hate that they ever made you feel like that.”

His hands slid back up to your sides, lips brushing your jaw. “You make it go quiet.”

“I want to,” you whispered.

Your kisses grew slow again, heavier with emotion than desire. You could feel his heartbeat where your chest pressed into his, your hands in his hair, his head tilted just enough to deepen the kiss. You rolled your hips slightly in his lap, and he groaned again, burying his face in your neck.

“Fuck, Y/N—”

“Jake,” you murmured, your nails dragging softly along his back, “look at me.”

He lifted his head. His eyes—wild, glassy, full of everything he couldn’t say.

“I love you,” you said again. “I’m not afraid of it. So don’t be either.”

He leaned forward, pressing your foreheads together. 

“I don’t want to lose you.”

“You won’t.”

“You’re so fucking pretty, did I ever tell you that?” He mumbled against the skin of your neck, brushing his lips all over before placing open mouthed kisses over the expanse of your clavicle, “so fucking pretty.”

Jake wasn’t gentle anymore, not when he’d been craving your presence, craving you. He couldn’t help but treat you like a reward, like he finally had won the only thing in life that actually mattered to him. 

He was quick to grab your waist and flip you over, getting on top of you on the couch that was too small for things he had planned in his mind. It was almost like a dam breaking the way his mouth was on your neck, biting, sucking, claiming you. 

“Jake—” you mumbled, your back arching as you felt his body pressing into you, fingers wrapped around his wet locks as he marked your skin with every ounce of desperation he had, his fingers mapping out every inch of your body as if he’s afraid he’d forget it—as if he could ever forget anything about you. 

The warmth of his hands brushed over your bra clad nipples, a whimper leaving your mouth. Jake wasn’t undressed yet you could feel him getting hard, and god you wondered just how big he was, grinding into you as if he was already inside your cunt. 

“I hurt you so fucking much,” Jake mumbled, lips ghosting over your tit, “now I’ll hurt you in the way you want me to,” he said with dark eyes, yanking your bra down enough for your nipples to show, latching his mouth to you all in light speed. 

All his life Jake couldn’t take control of anything, but seeing you shiver under him just made sense to Jake, he had to take control—he had to make you feel so good, you wouldn’t ever look at anyone else. 

“You’re fucking crazy,” you whispered, already disheveled with how needy you were, wetness pooling in your panties, soiling the new pair you had put on not too long ago. 

“Yeah? You drive me crazy, baby,” he chuckled, and that sound went straight to your pussy. Jake was hot, so fucking hot, but him using nicknames on you with his deep tone—only god knows how you would survive this. 

You bit your lip to conceal your moans, which only infuriated Jake, biting your nipple harshly to make sure you scream, “don’t fucking hide your pretty voice,” he said. 

His hands went to your other breast and he gave it a tight squeeze, your eyes were on him as you watched his lips parting, letting his tongue make contact with the tip of your very hardened nub. He bites down on your nipple, making you cry out, but quickly soothes it with his tongue before switching to the other side, he wants to drive you wild with pleasure, to possess every inch of your body.

Lost in the haze of pleasure, you surrender yourself completely to Jake’s possessive touches, letting him have his way with you. The room fills with the sounds of your moans and his desperate sucking, a symphony of carnal desire. In this moment, there is nothing but you and Jake, and the burning hunger that consumes you both. 

Jake’s hands roam across your body, his touch electric against your skin. He grabs your hips, pulling you flush against him as he claims your lips in yet another searing kiss, tongue delving into your mouth, hot and hungry, making you more hungry for his touch—for him. 

“I—can’t,” you whimpered, wanting more of him. 

Jake chuckled, “can’t even speak now, hm? What happened to the feisty lil’ girl who couldn’t shut up?” 

“Fuck, shut up,” you mumbled, tugging on his hair harder, which only made him groan and squeeze your tits harder, coming up to brush his lips against yours, hot breaths intertwining as he smirks, hand travelling down your body, very close to the hem of your shorts. 

“Want me to shut up?” He asked, squeezing your neck with slight pressure, your mouth opening in a gasp—he took the opportunity to spit in your mouth, watching your eyes widen as watches you gulp it down, “good fucking girl,” he mumbles. 

You were too gone to function anymore and you had just started, but you knew one thing—whatever Jake wanted, you’d let him do it to you. 

That man was no less than a Greek god with how sharp his features looked, especially in the dim light of the room, muscles flexing, abs on full display as he held himself up on top of you to press kisses all over. 

In a swift second, he pulled you up to unclasp your bra, throwing it away somewhere to continue pressing hot mouthed kisses down the valley of your breasts, and down your tummy, caressing it with the pad of his thumb, spending a good few seconds covering the expanse of your skin. 

You breathed harder once he reached the waistband of your shorts, his hooded eyes, almost drunk, looking up at you before he swiftly pulled them down, throwing them on the floor somewhere.

He couldn’t be gentle even if he tried, not when he was this thirsty, holding your legs open as he settled in the limited space that the couch held for him. Madman—that’s what he was and you couldn’t help but moan when he got closer to your panty clad cunt, burying his nose in the wet fabric, sniffing the scent of your arousal, groaning as he locked your thighs under his arms, which flexed harder now. 

You moaned his name as if a broken record repeating the same thing over and over again and he only mumbled things you couldn’t hear in your cunt, licking the already wet cloth, biting his lip at the first taste of you, “fuck—you’re so fucking perfect,” he says licking you harder, kissing your inner thighs alongside, leaving bites all over—he was feral. 

He slid your panties to the side, and the sight he had in front of him drove him to the edge. Jake was an impatient man, yes, he was messy, he was not the softest, but seeing you like this just made him realize how much crazier he could be. 

That first taste emboldens him and he dives in like a man starved, lapping at your folds like he’s trying to consume you entirely. 

His desperate tongue delves deep inside, fucking you with rapid strokes and curling to hit your sweet spot. You cry out sharply at the intense sensation, fingers tangling in his tousled raven hair to hold him in place. He grips your thighs tightly, holding you down and open for his onslaught as he devours you. 

Jake zeroes in on your clit, flicking and circling the sensitive bundle of nerves rapidly. Your back arches off the couch as he suckles hard on the throbbing bud, two fingers pumping inside your clenching hole.

“Fuck—Jake, I’m gonna cum!” You wail, thighs trembling violently around his head as your climax approaches rapidly. He doubles his efforts, fucking you harder with his fingers and lashing your clit mercilessly with his tongue.

He curls his fingers to stroke your G-spot with every thrust, drawing out more of your copious arousal to lap up greedily. Your walls start to flutter and clench around him as the pressure builds unbearably.

 Jake chuckled, the vibrations sending shockwaves through your body. “You like that, baby?” He practically purred, before sucking your clit into his mouth, flicking it with his tongue. 

“Fuck—yes,” you gasped, your head falling back against the couch. Jake was relentless, his tongue exploring every inch of you, driving you closer and closer to the edge. 

“Don’t stop,” you pleaded, your thighs trembling as you stared at the ceiling with your mouth open, desperate for air. 

Jake pulled back for a moment, looking up at you with a wicked grin, “you want more, kitten?” He teased, running a finger along your slit, “go on then, beg for it.”

You groaned in frustration, but you were too far gone to care, “please, Jake,” you begged, fueling his ego. 

“Shhh, be a good lil’ kitten for me, yeah?” He mumbled into your core mindlessly, sending shivers up your spine as your thighs shake. He didn’t stop, but just when your ecstasy was about to crash—

He stopped. 

You let out a frustrated groan and Jake only got up with the essence of you sprawled over his chin, his hard on begging to be freed. 

“Fuck?” You asked, trying to get up on your elbows, looking at him incredulously. 

He only gave you a once over, tongue poking his cheek from inside before he came closer, swooping you up in his arms easily as you yelped, eyes wide as he carried you to the bedroom, “no patience, huh?” He asked. 

He was proud of himself for making you this weak, for cracking your high wall down so he could see you, so he could ruin you. Jake was possessive, especially after knowing what you and Heeseung went through, he wanted you to have the best, and he was willing to be the best for you. 

“I—I was gonna cum!” You said, holding on to him for support.

“Did I say you could?” He replied smoothly. 

“What—Jake what the fuck?” You whined and he only chuckled.

“Be patient, love, or else you won’t be coming all fucking night, yeah?” He said as he let you get down on the bed. 

You looked so innocent, eyes watery, hair messy, looking up at him like an angry little kitten trying to look tough. He climbed the bed and you moved back, till your back hit the headboard and he hovered above you, caressing your cheek as he cupped your jaw, tilting your head up to look him in his eye. Your heartbeat speeding up yet again, and good lord you loved being manhandled by Jake. 

“What are you thinking?” He asked, thumb pushing on your lower lip. 

“Nothing.” You mumbled. 

He leaned in closer, “not thinking of my cock inside your pretty little cunt, hm?” He asks, watching you shiver at the thought, “by the time I'm done with you, you’ll be begging me to let you cum.”

Your jaw clenched as you slide your hand up Jake’s torso, tracing all the way from his abs to his neck, his own body reacting to your touch, cock twitching inside his pants by the time your hand rested on his nape, pulling him even closer so your noses were touching. 

“You know, Jake, you talk big game. Don’t make promises you can’t back up,” you mumbled to rile him up. 

Jake’s eyes flashed with a mixture of lust and irritation at your challenge, “oh, you’re going to regret those words,” he whispered, his hands gripping your hips possessively. “I’m going to make you beg for my cock, baby.”

He punctuated his statement with a sharp thrust of his fingers, two of them plunging deep into your sopping wet pussy. You gasped, your back arching off the bed as he worked them in and out, stroking along your sensitive walls.

“Fuck, you’re so tight,” he panted, his thumb rubbing firm circles on your clit. “I can’t wait to feel this perfect little cunt wrapped around my cock.”

You moaned, your hips rolling to meet his hand as he fucked you with his fingers. “Then stop talking and do something about it,” you shot back, your voice breathy with desire.

Jake chuckled darkly, withdrawing his fingers only to bring them to his mouth. He sucked them clean, his eyes never leaving yours as he savored your taste. “Mmh—delicious,” he purred, “but I’m not done playing with you yet.”

Before you could protest, he was pushing your thighs apart and settling between them. His tongue delved into your folds, lapping at your arousal like a man starved. You cried out, your fingers tangling in his hair as he devoured your pussy with single-minded intensity.

He worked you over mercilessly, his tongue and lips and teeth finding all the right spots to drive you wild. You bucked against his face, your thighs trembling as the pleasure built inside you. Just when you thought you might burst, Jake would back off, leaving you desperate and aching for release.

“Jake, please,” you whimpered, tugging on his hair in a futile attempt to guide him back to where you needed him most, “I need to cum. Please let me cum.”

He lifted his head, his chin glistening as he looked up at you. “Not yet,” he shook his head, his fingers continuing their maddeningly slow circles on your clit, “I want to hear you scream first.”

“I fucking can’t!” You breathed out, trying to control your moans again, “someone’s gonna hear and—ah—complain about it,” you said, which only made him scoff. 

“Is that it, hm? Have it your way then, princess,” he mumbled, yanking your soiled panties down all the way, balling it up in his first to make a gag out of it and shoving it down your mouth, “now you can scream all your want, Y/N.” He said, taking your name in his deep voice. 

And if you weren’t crazy before, now you had reached your limit of madness, even a poke from his side was like a pleasant burning wound to your skin, his actions also made you realize just how hungry Jake was for being the one in control. 

You squirmed beneath Jake, feeling utterly at his mercy as he continued his torturous teasing. The gag in your mouth muffled your moans but couldn’t silence them completely, much to Jake’s enjoyment. Your body arched, yearning for more, desperate for release.

“Such a needy lil’ thing, aren’t you?” Jake growled, his fingers still circling your sensitive bud, “I can feel how wet you are, taste how wet you are, dripping for me, hm?”

His words made you clench, fresh arousal coating his fingers. He gathered some of your slickness and slowly dragged it up to your throbbing clit, applying just the right amount of pressure. Your hips bucked up in hopes of seeking more contact.

“Hm—so responsive,” Jake purred, looking pleased with himself, “I could do this all night—keep you on the edge, begging so desperately for me.”

“Please—” you tried to say around the gag, your eyes pleading, you were so close, teetering on the brink of an explosive climax. Just a little more.

But Jake seemed determined to deny you that satisfaction, easing off right as you were about to fall over into your state of euphoria, frustration bubbled up inside you, mingling with the overwhelming lust coursing through your veins.

“You’re going to have to do better than that, baby,” Jake taunted, nipping at your inner thigh, “I want to hear you scream my name—let everyone know who you belong to.”

His fingers circled, feather-light touches that drove you wild with need. You thrashed beneath him, incoherent noises of desperation spilling from your lips. Jake just chuckled darkly, clearly enjoying your plight, removing your gag to hear you gasp loudly, his name on the tip of your tongue. 

Jake was cruel, so cruel the way he denied your orgasm yet again with a smirk playing on his face, a whole one eighty from how he was an hour back and you were crying by now, something he seemed to enjoy too as he licked your face, tasting the salty teardrop you let out, “this makes me wanna ruin you more, y’know?” 

“Fuck—Jake, let me cum please,” you sobbed as he took you in his arms. 

“You wanna cum, hm?” He asked as you settled on his lap, his hard on pressing against your thigh as you nodded, “fuck, you look so pretty crying like that for me, like a doll, a doll for me to use, hm?”

You couldn’t take it anymore, getting off and undoing his pant buttons as he watched you with amusement how you struggled to take off his pants and boxers, only to find his cock waiting for you, hard and proud. 

Jake’s cock was throbbing, hard and ready to burst, as you took him into your mouth, your tongue swirling around his tip in a teasing manner. You could taste the salty beads of precum leaking from his slit, the flavor sending a jolt of desire straight to your core.

“Fuck—baby,” Jake groaned, his fingers threading through your hair as you bobbed your head, taking him deeper into your throat. “Your mouth feels so good. Keep going just like that, good girl.”

You moaned around his length, the vibrations making him shudder. Your own arousal was dripping down your thighs, coating them with your slick essence. The wet sounds of your slurping filled the room, mingling with Jake’s heavy breaths and grunts of pleasure.

“Shit—fuck, take it easy, I won’t be able to hold back," he panted, his grip on your hair tightening, “I’m gonna fucking come down your throat if you keep sucking me like that.”

You redoubled your efforts, eager to taste his release. Your tongue flattened against the underside of his shaft as you sucked harder, determined to milk him of every last drop. Just as you felt him start to swell, signaling his impending orgasm, you pulled away with a pop.

Jake’s eyes jolted open, a mix of confusion and frustration flashing across his face. “What the fuck, baby? Why the fuck did you stop?”

You just smiled coyly up at him, licking your lips. “Because I want you to cum inside me. I want to feel you fill me up with your hot cum, or are you too much of a coward to fuck me?” You teased, your grin making him scoff. 

God he loved you. 

Jake growled, a predatory gleam in his eyes. In a flash, he grabbed your hips and flipped you onto your side, your back pressed firmly against his torso. 

Before you could even process the sudden change in position, he was lined up at your entrance, the head of his cock nudging your slick folds.

“Teasing me will only get you punished,” he warned, his voice low and husky with desire. “I’m going to fuck you so hard, you won’t be able to walk straight for a week.”

With that promise, he slammed into you, burying himself to the hilt in one powerful thrust. You cried out at the sudden intrusion, your back arching as he filled you completely. Jake set a brutal pace, pounding into you with wild abandon.

You let out a sharp cry as Jake’s thick cock stretched you open, filling you so deeply that you could feel him bulging through your lower abdomen. The feeling of his hard length pulsing inside you sent shockwaves of pleasure through your body, making you arch your back and press your ass against him.

“Lord—ah yes,” you gasped, grinding against him, “you’re—so fucking big.”

Jake grunted in response, his fingers digging into your hips as he continued to pound into you at a furious pace. The sounds of skin slapping against skin and your needy moans filled the room, mixing with the creaking of the bed frame beneath you.

“Shit, your cunt is so tight,” Jake mumbled, his breath hot against your neck. “Squeezing my cock like a desperate doll—you were made for me, baby. Made to take my dick and milk me dry.”

His filthy words only heightened your arousal, making you clench even tighter around him. You could feel your orgasm building again, the tension coiling in your core as he hit that special spot deep inside you with each thrust.

“Please don’t stop, not this time,” you pleaded, your nails digging into his thighs. “Fuck me harder, Jake. I’m so fucking close.”

He was quick to flip you over again so you were resting on your back, his hips settling in between you as he held your thighs up, your legs resting on both his shoulders with ease as he snapped into you harder, plunging his cock with more need, as if he was a monster hungry for lust and only lust.

Jake snarled, his hips snapping forward with a newfound vigor. One hand moved around to rub firm circles around your clit, pushing you closer and closer to the edge. Your body began to tremble, your breath coming out in short gasps as you found yourself on the brink of ecstasy.

“Cum for me,” Jake demanded, pinching your clit hard, “I want to feel you cum all over my dick, baby.”

With a scream of his name, you practically exploded, your pussy clamping down around him like a vice as your orgasm crashed over you. Your body convulsed, your back bowing as wave after wave of intense pleasure washed through you, which shocked Jake because you weren’t just having an orgasm. 

You were squirting all over his cock. 

Jake followed shortly after, his cock pulsing as he spilled his release deep inside you, as he breathed hard, watching you with surprised eyes.

“Fuck,” he groaned, grinding against you to prolong your shared climax, “you’re so fucking hot, so fucking mine.”

You whimpered at the feeling of his hot cum painting your walls, the sensation making your pussy flutter around his shaft. Jake held you close as you both rode out the aftershocks, his softening cock still buried inside you.

“You’re mine,” he mumbled, “say it.”

“Yours—I’m yours,” you breathed as best as you could. 

“Again.”

“I’m yours, Jake.”

“Fuck—again.”

“So so fucking yours, I’m all yours Jake.”

“Mine,” he whispered, so possessive. 

After a few moments, Jake carefully pulled out and rolled you onto your back. He pressed gentle kisses along your jawline and down your neck, his touch soothing and tender in contrast to the rough passion from moments before.

“That was intense,” he murmured, nuzzling against your collarbone, “I don’t think i’ll ever get enough of you, baby. You’re fucking addictive.”

You smiled up at him, reaching up to cup his face. "I could say the same about you. The way you fuck me, it’s like you’re a fucking beast.”

“Was I too harsh?” He asked, placing soft kisses all over, “I’m sorry I just lost control—you have no idea how badly I need you, I don’t think I can stop,” he confessed. 

You kissed him again, “then don’t stop, just don’t.”

That’s all he needed to hear for the night, that you were finally his, and he was yours. He smirked, the night was just getting started. 

Chapter 10: Hate me less? You love me more. 

You don’t remember how the night ended, not when Jake kept his promise of how you wouldn’t be able to walk anymore once he was done with you, and he was precise about it. He was far from done when he made you fall apart on his cock so many times, you lost count. 

It was a crazy switch up once you both were done, he took care of you, almost like he was made for it, helping you clean up in little bathtub which was definitely too small to fit the both of you, yet he helped you bath, a faint blush on his face as you laughed once he tried to act sly, touching you again when you were so sensitive and overstimulated. 

Turns out, Jake can be super clingy when he has to be, also not letting you go once you get out of the tub, helping you dry your hair, helping you moisturize your body, helping you smile by kissing you every few seconds. 

He held you to sleep, not before hearing you say you actually want him and it’s not a dream. Jake doesn’t remember if he ever felt this way before, this warmth called happiness that you provided him so easily. 

“I love you,” he mumbled to your sleeping figure, he was whipped, already thinking of your future together. Yeah, maybe it all happened too quickly, he still wouldn’t have it any other way. He wouldn’t mind getting through all the hurt again if it meant that he’d wake up to you sleeping next to him—to you loving him. 

It was perhaps the best day of Jake’s life. 

The air felt different today.

Not because of the weather, which was finally warm and breezy after days of storm and stress, but because Jake was walking beside you—not behind, not ahead—beside you. His fingers were laced with yours, his thumb brushing over your skin every few steps like he was still checking if this was real, he still couldn’t believe it. 

It was.

You passed the main quad slowly, in no rush. The two of you didn’t need to say much. Conversations dimmed as you walked through. You could feel the glances, the whispers.

Someone definitely said your name. Then his.

And then, clear as day, they whispered. 

“Wait—are they actually holding hands?”

Jake didn’t flinch.

Not like he would’ve, weeks ago. Not like the boy who couldn’t stand being seen, being known. Instead, he just grabbed your hand a little tighter—casual, sure, and completely unbothered. His expression said it all—Yeah, and?

You chuckled. “Think they’re combusting?”

“Oh, definitely,” he said, tugging you closer with a smugness he barely bothered to hide anymore. “Especially that one girl who’s walking with me, who swore she’d never even look at me.”

“She wasn’t entirely wrong,” you teased. “You were kind of a menace.”

He groaned, tossing his head back, “were?”

You laughed, and it made him smile, soft and full, the kind of smile he used to hide and now gave you freely.

“You’re doing that look again,” he said, side-eyeing you. “Like you’re psychoanalyzing me.”

“Maybe I am. Can’t help it. You’re a walking dissertation, y’know?”

“Yeah? What’s the title?”

You looked up at him with a shrug. “How to fall for someone you’re supposed to hate.”

That made him stop walking.

You blinked, startled, but he was already turning to face you, his hoodie sleeves pushed up just enough to show the fading bruises on his knuckles—old reminders of the version of him you never gave up on.

“I’m glad you did,” he said. “Fall for me, even when I made it so damn hard.”

You smiled slowly, the kind of smile that made his breath catch. “You still do.”

“Yeah, well,” he squeezed your hand, “at least I’m hot.”

You were too busy rolling your eyes to realize you’d just walked past Heeseung and his friends until the entire bench went awkwardly quiet. Heeseung looked up, eyes flicking from your joined hands to your face, and then to Jake—who didn’t even spare him a glance.

He was too focused on you. Too content stealing a bite of your ice cream like it was the most natural thing in the world.

“Let’s go,” you muttered, trying not to laugh as you nudged him forward.

Jake followed. No hesitation.

Because this, the hand holding, the quiet teasing, the stares that didn’t matter anymore, this was normal.

And for the first time in his life, Jake finally understood: Normal didn’t mean boring.

It meant chosen. It meant enough.

It meant being yours.

THANK YOU FOR READING!

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[rafesangelita]

♡ bitchy!kook!reader finally lets rafe fuck..

warnings: making out, slight degradation, teasing, fingering, loss of virginity, unprotected sex, praise, multiple orgasms

a/n: thank you to the anon who sent in this prompt request for my follower celly! i accidentally deleted your ask ૮₍ ˃ ⤙ ˂ ₎ა

you didn’t expect things to get this heated, this fast, both you and rafe messily kissing each other in the darkness of his room, his playlist playing softly in the background while his hands didn’t leave a single inch of you untouched. you could feel his hard-on poking you through the thin lace material of your panties, your resolve crumbling more and more as you let yourself get lost in the taste of him, your desire to surrender and give into his advances only growing with each filthy sentence he spoke to you. “remember all that tough shit you were talking? ‘saying i couldn’t handle all of this but here you are fucking dripping for it..”

you whimpered, your head rolling to the side as rafe planted his lips on your neck, his hand snaking down underneath the hem of your skirt until his fingers slipped below the waistband of your underwear. “you know i can make you feel so good, baby, just give me the word..” he whispered, his teeth lightly grazing your flesh just as his fingertips dipped between your folds, a curse falling from his mouth as your slick allowed him to stroke your clit with ease. you gasped softly, your nails digging into his skin as he rubbed hard, firm circles around your sensitive bud. “come on..” rafe encouraged you quietly, “let me fuck you.”

you sighed softly, your eyes fluttering closed as he moved his lips down from your neck to your chest, his digits continuing their ministrations on your needy cunt. you couldn’t believe you were finally giving into him, all the months of begging and pleading with you to let him have his way all coming to an end once you nodded, your boyfriend cursing under his breath as he tried to his best to keep his composure. rafe’s fingers prodded at your entrance, the sensation making you panic before you stopped him. “wait—!” you panted, slightly embarrassed, “i’ve never done this before, rafe..”

upon hearing your words, rafe used his free hand to grip the back of your neck, his gaze scanning down your pretty face as his chest rose and fell in disbelief. your usual bitchy expression was long gone and was now replaced with what looked like intimidation, your brow etched with worry as you watched the realization dawn on him. “holy shit—” rafe laughed, “you’re a virgin?” you looked away from him, avoiding his burning gaze. “don’t be weird about it, you’re not special.” rafe scoffed, his jaw clenching as he pushed his fingertips into you. crying out, your nails raked down his toned chest, the burning tension making you wince.

“these are just my fingers, babe.. if you can barely handle this, just imagine when i’m fucking you balls deep.” the thought alone made you shudder, a shiver running down your spine as rafe began filling you up with digits, your walls fluttering around the welcomed intrusion. “gentle, please..” you whimpered, a hiss leaving your lips when he pulled at the roots of your hair, forcing you to look at him as he started thumbing at your clit. “gentle?” he laughed, “why would i be gentle with you? you’re not special.” rafe used your words from earlier against you before curling his digits and hitting that soft spot inside of you, your head falling onto his shoulder at the added stimulation.

“m’gonna make you cum all over my fingers, ‘get you all nice and stretched out before i fuck you stupid, yeah?” you whined, wrapping your arms around his neck as your breathing grew sporadic, the heavy tension in your core making your limbs feel like jelly. “fuckkk!” you squealed, burying your face in his chest as you felt the sudden snap in your tummy, your pussy squeezing around rafe’s digits like a vice. you saw stars behind the backs of your eyes, your thighs trembling as he held your hips down to keep you from moving away from him. “r-rafe, that’s enough,” you huffed, “s’too much now!” considering you were about to let him pop your cherry, he decided he’d give your poor cunt a break.

rafe didn’t give you nearly enough time to recover before he had your wrists pinned between tits, your ankles sitting prettily on his shoulders as he tapped the aching tip of his cock against your clit. “i’m never gonna let you live this down,” rafe teased, slipping only the tip in to watch the way you took your bottom lip between your teeth, “no one’s ever gonna fuck you like this.” was the last thing he said before thrusting into you without warning, a half scream emitting from your throat as rafe groaned, his eyes glued to where you two were connected.

“oh my god, you’re fucking gorgeous—” rafe said through gritted teeth, admiring every detail of you he hadn’t seen before tonight. you were rendered speechless, any kind of protests or smart remarks dying on the tip of your tongue as the ache between your legs dulled and melted into pure unadulterated pleasure. from pained whimpers to pleading cries, rafe’s lips found yours as he fucked into you with an unforgiving force. nipping his bottom lip, rafe hissed, cursing under his breath as you managed to get your hands out of his grip.

“not so scared anymore?” he teased, his words making you roll your eyes. “shut up, rafe— oh!” your back arched up into his chest when he changed his momentum, the long strokes of his hips making you hiccup. “tell me to shut up again.” you just about lost it when you felt his thumb return to your clit, your palms pushing against his stomach at the overwhelming pressure building up in your tummy. you hated how easy it was for him to take control of you in this moment, but god, you felt too good to care. not daring to say another word, your eyes screwed shut as rafe pushed you over the edge, his own orgasm causing his hips to stutter.

burying himself as deep as he could, you pulled rafe close as he emptied himself inside of you, your toes curling as he filled you up with his seed, the thick, hot ropes of cum painting your insides while you cried at the overwhelming feeling of your high. you felt like your head was in the clouds, your vision growing hazy as you blinked in slow motion up at the high ceiling. with rafe’s weight on top of you like this, and his moans in your ear, you reveled in the new intimacy that you two hadn’t yet shared with each other, both of you holding onto each other as your climaxes subsided.

still nestled inside of you, rafe collapsed on top of you, your hands wasting no time in moving his bangs out of his face, your heart fluttering in your chest at the sight of the smug grin on his lips. “don’t you dare say anything—”

“i can’t believe you actually let me hit.” rafe sighed, leaving a trail of kisses along your collarbone. you shook your head, a soft laugh leaving your lips as you twirled the ends of his hair with your perfectly manicured fingers. “act up and you’re not getting sex for as long as you piss me off.” you threatened, your words making his eyebrows raise. “you don’t have to worry about me acting up after this.. i can’t go on without it now.” you rolled your eyes at his dramatics before he took your lips in a kiss. “i hope you’re not fucked out just yet, i got some more rounds in me.”

[sunderwight]

Shen Yuan, realizing he doesn't have the faintest idea what Airplane's real name is/was: hey so what were you called back in our "hometown"?

Shang Qinghua, abruptly nervous: uh, well, I mean does it matter? You know my handle anyway so why is it important?

Shen Yuan: I don't know. aren't you curious about my name?

Shang Qinghua, profusely sweating: nah not really bro, the past is the past, it's probably better to just leave it where it is

Shen Yuan: I guess that makes sense... how philosophical of you.

Shang Qinghua, still hoping he can take the fact that his name was "Luo Binghe" to the grave: yeah man I mean it was a whole other life. I'm not even sure I remember anymore.

[buckyblogs]

MY BUCKY FIC RECOMMENDATIONS

• ‘come home to me’ - during the rise and ruin of the second world war, a sharp-tongued brooklyn girl falls for james buchanan barnes—only to lose him to the battlefield, a presumed death, and the silence that follows. but almost two years later, when the war is long over and the wounds have scarred over, he comes back through her door, proving that some promises do survive the fire. (14.7k) @danysdaughter

! • ‘promise without ceremony’ - Bucky Barnes gave up on marriage a long time ago. But then, somewhere deep in a storm-soaked safe house, he pulls a bullet from your leg and accidentally proposes in the process. (3.9k) @cheekybarnes

• ‘lessons in lovemaking’ - You and Bucky Barnes go undercover as a married couple, but when a fake kiss gets too real, he unexpectedly finishes in his pants—leaving you both stunned. (smut masterlist) @artficlly

• ‘this is (not) fine’ - personal assistant rules: don’t crush on bucky barnes. definitely don’t misinterpret a flower purchase and spiral into silent heartbreak, and absolutely never ever get stuck alone with him in an elevator. (smut - 9.1k) @artficlly

• ‘take me home’ - the team discovers bucky's relationship with you when bucky searches for you in the hospital after hydra attacks new york (secret marriage - 1.7k) @parkers-gal

• ‘jackass’ - Everyone is horrified that Bucky is flirting with a married woman, but then they realise there's a reason why. (secret marriage - 3k) @aquaticmercy

! • ‘lumberjack!bucky series’ - Roots and Branches is the main story, Hardwood the follow-up, and the rest are one shots that you can read -or not- in the order you desire. (oh my god i love this) @vunblr

• ‘moving in’ - You're moving into your brand new apartment with Bucky. (beefy!bucky smut) @brunchable

• ‘movie night’ - You come home exhausted from another day of work, not expecting Bucky to surprise you with a little heart-warming gesture to show you how much he appreciates you. (fiance) @brunchable

• ‘my neighbour is a p⭐️’ - Things have turned awkward. You and Bucky hasn't spoken with each other for a few days now. But is the much needed space making things better or worse? (part 3/3 - other parts are in their masterlist!) @brunchable

• ‘all the apple cider and no more haunted houses’ - you and bucky barnes have a love-hate relationship—you love him and you believe he hates you—but when your friends insist on going to the scariest haunted house attraction in the area, the experience ends up forcing your real feelings for each other out into light. (smut - 11.1k) @witchywithwhiskey

• ‘the forever third wheels’ - it's the weekend of your town's annual valentine's day carnival and you go with your group of friends, though you can't help but be sad you don't have someone special in your life. your friend, and fellow third wheel, bucky barnes makes it his mission to give you a valentine's day you won't soon forget—and show you how special you are to him. (6.6k) @witchywithwhiskey

• ‘the day after’ - Your new roommate introduces you to her brother, but you met him last night. (implied smut - 2.3k+) @navybrat817

! • ‘like he means it’ - You can’t take another night of hearing Bucky fuck a girl who isn’t you. (oh my god 😭😍 - mentions of sex - 13.6k) @marvelstoriesepic

*! • ‘summer surprise’ - You've been looking forward to kicking off the summer with a week on your dads new boat. You decide to have one last night of fun before committing to a week on the sea with your family. But you're thrown into a world of shock when you realize the older man you slept with, only days prior, is not only friends with your dad, but also joining you for the trip. (age-gap! - 21k) @pome-seed

*! • ‘we couldn’t stop’ - During a sweep of a forgotten HYDRA lab, you, Steve, and Bucky trigger an old aerosol dispersal system. No one realizes what hit you until it’s too late. Now stuck in quarantine- burning, aching, and caged in with two dominant, unraveling super soldiers- you’re forced to ride out the drug’s effects together. (Bucky & Steve - 7k) @societyfolklore

WILL KEEP UPDATING!

* means new, ! means personal favourites

MAKE SURE TO FOLLOW AND CHECK OUT ALL THESE AMAZING AUTHOR’S CONTINUED WORKS!

[thevaelguard]

And please tell me why you'd want your chosen studio to take over in the tags!! :] Orrr why you don't trust any of them >:]

[livwritessometimes]

Think Fast, I’m A Random Girl…

: Max Verstappen, Lando Norris, Oscar Piastri, Charles Leclerc, Carlos Sainz, Lewis Hamilton, George Russell, Alex Albon, Franco Colapinto, Pierre Gasly, and Daniel Ricciardo

: Main Masterlist

…

Max Verstappen

- You had seen this trend on TikTok, and ever since then, you had wanted to try it out on Max. You knew he was never the type to even look at a another women, so doing something like this would be fun.

- There he was, blissfully unaware Max Verstappen, washing the dishes. This was probably the best time to try it, since he wouldn't have time to think. And so you did. You jump from behind and quickly blurt 'Think Fast, I'm A Random Girl' and leaned in to kiss him.

- Without even a second of hesitation, Max emptied a cup filled with soap water on top of you head. "WTF MAX! WHY DID YOU DO THAT" "You said 'think fast' I think this was pretty fast" He said and went back to washing dishes, leaving you shocked and drenched in dishwash. Although now, the only thing on his mind was how quick his reaction had been. Maybe he should do this again but this time with a stopwatch.

Lando Norris

- Over the span of two years that you and Lando had been together, he had pulled multiple pranks on you. So, I think it's fair to say you wanted to give him a taste of his own medicine.

- The moment you watched the 'Think Fast, I'm A Random Girl' trend, you knew this was the one. So, you began your quest to find Lando and pull off this prank. You found him in kitchen, gathering all the ingredients to make his favourite sandwich. Without wasting a single second, you screamed the phrase and ran towards him.

- In a moment of complete panic, Lando did the only thing he could think off. He threw the entire loaf of bread at you. Yes, you read that right. He threw baked flour at your face. And no, I'm not talking about some soft, half-hearted toss like 'throw the nearest object at someone in a playfully annoyed way' NO. I'm talking full energy, like he's in a baseball game, ready for the first pitch. Think full force, full passion. Then he just stares back at you in shock, as if he's the one who has a reason to be shocked. "You can't just sneak up on me when I'm emotionally vulnerable. You know how seriously i take my sandwich, Y/n. Now pass me the bread, I still need to finish this"

Oscar Piastri

- Lando had sent you this trend, saying, 'Ohhh do this to Osc!!!!!' 'Record the whole thing and send it to me' 'omggg I'm so excited! If its good, I'll ask McLaren's admin to post!!!!!!!!!' I think we all know who was more excited about this trend. It was a good thing Oscar was already on his way home, else, you were almost certain Lando would have tried the trend himself.

- The plan was simple, wait for Oscar to get home, take him to the living room, where you would already have your phone set up, and pull the prank. Except...it wasn't that simple. While waiting for him to be back, you completely forgot about the trend and started to finish random chores you had been putting off. By the time you remembered, Oscar was already in the living room looking, extremely confused. There was no time, it was either now or never. So you looked him dead in the eye and said 'Think Fast, I'm A Random Girl'

- Out of habit, Oscar kissed you back before he even registered what you had just said. He immediately pulled away, looking even more confused, if that was possible. "Wait- what?" "Wait, stop it" "This is assault. Stay away or else I'll call the cops" He said all of this while slowly backing away from you, frankly afraid of what you might do next. The video ends with you clutching you stomach, falling to the ground laughing, and Oscar just walking off, too tired to deal with whatever that had just happened. I think it's safe to assume the reel made it to all McLaren platforms (all thanks to Lando)

Charles Leclerc

- You see Charles sitting in the living room, looking peaceful, and think, yeah, let's interrupt that. So you spend the next 15 minutes trying to find a trend you could try with him. That's when you see the 'Think Fast, I'm A Random Girl' trend. The plan was simple, go up to him, talk for a few minutes, then throw in the sentence as quickly as possible and finally attack him.

- And so that's what you did. You sit beside him, all innocent, asking him about different things, talking about the upcoming race. The second Charles began his rant about next week's strategy, you knew this was your chance, and so you took it. Quickly throwing in the random girl line and kissing him.

- In a split second, Charles used both his hands and pushed you with such force, that you fell flat on your back. Instantly, he started gagging. As seconds passed, the gagging just got more intense. As you sat up, you saw Charles leaning against the balcony, still pretending to gag. "GET—Blegh—THE—Blegh—FUCK—Blegh—AWAY—Blegh—FROM—Blegh—ME" At this point, even Leo was looking concerned at his father. He slowly turned his little head, looking at you as if saying 'Is this man okay?' Picking him up, you start walking towards the bedroom, "Leo I think it's safe to say your father will never kiss a random woman. Although I can't say for certain, he might give her PTSD. But oh well" Leaving a dramatic Charles still acting repulsed on the balcony, not knowing his audience is now cuddling in the bed away from his antics.

Carlos Sainz

- Carlos had this thing, where he would always prank you by jumping out of random places to scare you. Everyone by now knew you hated jump scares, so naturally, half of Williams' account was filled with videos of Carlos scaring you. It was about time you started planning your revenge. What you didn't expect was for the fans to come through. You got tagged in multiple videos about this trend going on where you kiss your boyfriend and say 'pretend I'm a random woman'. It made sense to try this out, after all, Carlos had this coming.

- You saw him in the bedroom talking to someone over the phone. What better time to do this than now? So you sneak up behind him and say the magic phrase 'Think Fast, I'm A Random Girl' and wrap your arms around his waist, excited to see his reaction.

- You expected Carlos to be confused. You expected him to not pay attention to what you had just said. You even expected him to wriggle away from your hold. What you didn't expect him to do was lift his free hand in full force and elbow you straight in the rib. So there you are, laying on the ground clutching your—now probably—bruised rib. "Y/n you should not sneak up on me! You know I took self-defense classes, mi amor" He said as he abandoned his phone and helped you off the ground. One thing's for certain now: you will never try to sneak up on Carlos Sainz Jr. EVER AGAIN

Lewis Hamilton

- Lewis has always been put together. Always presentable, Always calm. He likes to say 'I'm too old for all this' when he sees the grid being childish. But we all know this man loves to indulge in it from time to time. So one day while, you were walking around in the paddock, all the rookies surrounded you. From far away, if someone were to see this scene, they'd think, 'awww all the rookies are bonding with you' 'they all look so cute together' 'grid mum moment' but if they were to walk closer, they'd hear the planning and plotting. None of the rookies had been able to prank Lewis yet. So far, they had successfully crossed off Max, Oscar, George, Alex, and Charles from the list. There were still many more to go, but the day they saw Lewis shake his head and laugh at their antics, that's when they decided who next in the list.

- But all that being said, pranking Sir Lewis Hamilton turned out to be more difficult than they expected. Which is why they decided to pull in a wild card. The wild card being: you. The plan was simple. Say the phrase to Lewis, see his reaction, and record the whole thing for the rookies to see. And so off you went.

- You texted Lewis that you were waiting for him in his driver's room. You had already set up the camera, ready to pull off the prank. The moment he entered the room and closed the door behind him, you initiated the plan 'Think Fast, I'm A Random Girl' You had barely finished your sentence before Lewis turned around in one swift movement, grabbed your face, and pushed you backwards on the sofa. "I'M MARRIED BITCH" "STAY DOWN" He then calmly walked towards the bottle of water that was on the table. You sat still, unable to wrap your mind around what had just happened, and just before the video ended, you were heard whispering 'But we're not even married yet' It's safe to say the rookies LOVED it!

George Russell

- George Russell was many things—smart, funny, British, a tire whisperer—but more than anything, he was currently getting on Alex's last nerve. Which is how you found yourself in a huddled position with Alex and Lily outside the Mercedes garage. "Y/n, you gotta do this for the greater good" "And what do I get in return?" "My respect, the thrill of pranking George, a dinner treat from yours truly" "Hmmm..." "Ugh, fine! Lily for a week" "You've got yourself a deal"

- So here you were, phone all set, ready for George to return from his meeting with Toto. Your antics had caught the attention of the garage, and you already had three cameras set, ready to record your prank in 4K for Mercedes' channel. You heard George before you saw him turn the corner. The moment he stepped within your reach, you said the phrase and quickly reach out for him.

- 'Think Fast, I'm A Random Girl' George immediately grabbed both your hands and pushed you away from him "Ugg—ahh—back off" "HELP" "SOMEONE HELP" "SECURITY" He screamed as he dramatically launched himself to the wall to get as far away from you as possible. At that exact moment, Toto walked out. Immediately all the cameras turned to catch his reaction. Toto suddenly paused, looked at the entire scene in front of him, then looking at you, then at George. He let out a deep sigh before he turned around and walked back into his office, closing the door for good measure.

Alex Albon

- Alex had always been chaotic. There was never a dull moment in your relationship. From the time he tried to cook pasta in the hotel's kettle and almost burned down your room, to the time he desperately tried to convince you to steal an alligator from the zoo, saying 'I'd make a great addition to the Albon zoo'. Life was full of unpredictable surprises with him. So naturally, when you came across this trend, you knew in your heart you had to try it, because what are the odds you saw this trend the same day Alex was staying over? It was like the universe wanted you to try it.

- So here you were, standing in the kitchen watching Alex contemplate between Harry Potter and Mean Girls. It was go time. You quickly placed your phone and hit record before making your way to him. When Alex saw you, he put the Diet Coke can down and reached out for you. Just as he was about to hug you, you yelled, 'Think Fast, I'm A Random Girl'

- In an instant, he grabbed the front of your shirt, pulled you towards him, and let out the loudest burp in your face. It felt like an eternity had passed, but his burp hadn't stopped. When it finally ended, it was like your knees gave out, and you fell to the floor. "Did—um—did you just burp on my face?" "Well yeah, I had to do something. It was my defense mechanism" "YOUR DEFENSE MECHANISM WAS GAS??" "You told me to think fast. You gotta admit that was some pretty fast thinking, ay?" And with that, he turned back to the TV, finally deciding to watch Mean Girls.

Franco Colapinto

- Franco was anything but calm. If there was one Taylor Swift lyric he could relate it, it was 'I swear I don't love the drama, it loves me.' From the moment he made his debut in F1, everyone knew, this guy loves to be a menace. Be it his lack of PR-trained behavior or his ability to always do or say something that lands him in trouble (and the two of you in yet another PR meeting) So you thought, why not let his behavior influence you, just this once?

- So there you were, sitting with Alpine's admin, ready to pull this prank on him. The moment you got the signal from the admin, you made your way towards him. Franco saw you and smiled. As he started to make his way towards you, arms open expecting a hug, you quickly screamed 'Think Fast, I'm A Random Girl'

- Franco: "NO BACK OFF" "I'M GAY" You: 👁👄👁 Alpine's Admin : 👁👄👁 Pierre: 👁👄👁 Everyone Else: 👁👄👁 Franco looked around and saw everyone's reaction and immediately sprinted out of the garage. "FRANCO WAIT" With that, you ran after him. Seeing the chaos, the admin also started running after you guys, because there was no way in hell they were going to miss something like this.

Pierre Gasly

- Pierre had surprised you with a vacation during the one race-free week he had. You were beyond happy to finally get to spend some time with him. You had not been able to attend the first few races due to work, so some alone time together sounded amazing. While you were waiting for your room, you decided to scroll through TikTok. While doing that, one video caught your eye. Looking up at Pierre, you saw him look your way and give you a flying kiss. You smiled and looked back down at the video. You knew what you had to do.

- Setting up your phone near the edge of the jacuzzi, you leaned back into his arms. You tried really hard to suppress the smirk that was itching to make itself known. "Hey babe…" you said, looking at him. He nodded, signaling you to go on. You quickly blurted, 'Think Fast, I'm A Random Girl' and moved to kiss him.

- It was almost like he knew this would happen, because the second those words left your lips, he dunked your head underwater. So your phone captured good four seconds worth of footage of you flailing your arms and legs, trying to understand why you suddenly couldn't breathe. The moment you were back up, Pierre started laughing, looking at your expression. The whole thing was so unreal that you yourself couldn't help but laugh as you reached for your phone to end the video. Safe to say someone did not get lucky the entire vacation. And someone definitely ended up with a new necklace.

Daniel Ricciardo

- Grocery shopping was always a fun experience. Doing it with Daniel just made the entire experience even better. It was your thing. There had never been a single grocery trip that either of you had refused to go on. You love it so much that every time you see a grocery store trend, you guys immediately rush to the nearest one to your house and record one yourself. So, when you saw a video of someone doing this to their boyfriend in the grocery store, you immediately called Daniel and asked if he wanted to go for a grocery run.

- So there you were, in the cornflakes aisle, setting up your phone to record Daniel's reaction. Seeing you press record, Daniel walked into the frame and started to do a little dance. There couldn't have been a more perfect moment than this, when Danny was being himself. You walked towards him and quickly said, 'Think Fast, I'm A Random Girl'

- Daniel stopped whatever he was doing, turned to look at you, and said "I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND" The only problem was he said that a little too loud, because now two random shoppers, three workers, and one baby who was sitting on the cart were looking your way. After this, Danny immediately walked away to a different aisle. Leaving you standing there awkwardly looking like a stranger who hits on committed men. You quickly grabbed your phone and ran after him, already yelling "DANIEL JOSEPH RICCIARDO, GET BACK"

...

Tags: @wobblymug | @evasmlp | @ln8118 | @piastri-fvx | @vannylen2144 | @freyathehuntress

[navybrat817]

A Kindred Spirit

Pairing: Thunderbolts!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Summary: Bucky meets a kindred spirit while he's grocery shopping.

Word Count: Over 2.2k

Warnings: Alpine the cat (is that a warning?), established relationship, humor, sweetness, fluff, Bucky Barnes (he's a warning, okay?).

A/N: More Tower Shenanigans. @buckybarnesfic, this is for you! ❤️ Not beta read and written on my phone, so any and all mistakes are my own. Divider by the talented @saradika-graphics. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

It was Bucky’s turn to go grocery shopping, which he enjoyed and loathed. It was nice being able to pick out his own food, but he had to bite back a retort every time someone left their cart in the middle of the aisle or took a little too long when they stood in front of a shelf. He should’ve asked you to join him, but he was already out running another errand and didn’t want to bother you. If you were there with him, you would’ve giggled when he grumbled at the list. You would have also agreed with him when he complained about the high cost of food, wondering why everything was so expensive. It was insane.

Walking through the store, he kept an ear open while trying not to draw attention to himself. It was an old habit from when he was on the run. He willed his shoulders to relax, but instead, he glared up at the fluorescent light, his hand twitching with the desire to hold yours. He enjoyed holding your hand, which grounded him, and loved how your heart skipped a beat whenever he kissed it.

The sooner he finished shopping, the sooner he’d get back to the tower and you.

“Why are there so many PopTarts on this list?” he muttered as he went to the cereal aisle and put them in the cart. To be fair, he hadn’t realized there were so many flavors, and he knew he wouldn’t hear the end of it if he didn’t get the right ones.

He snorted when he saw that deodorant was next on the list, immediately clocking John’s handwriting. “That’s not food, so I’m not getting it.” Yeah, it was petty of him, since he could technically buy non-edible products at the grocery store. Maybe he was still annoyed by John's comment about your ass. You had a stunning ass, capable of leaving people in awe. That didn't mean he wanted the junior varsity Captain America to ogle it.

While Bucky had a tendency to get John the generic brand of foods, he did take dietary needs and favorite foods seriously. There was a particular brand of hot sauce that Yelena preferred, and he made sure to get the largest bottle possible. He made sure to get different types of fries as well, as there was an ongoing debate about whether regular, crinkle, or curly cut fries were the best. John almost flipped the table, but the argument died down when Bucky said he’d always share his fries with you. Ava said that was love.

She was right.

The thought of you softened his demeanor, and it softened even further when he saw your handwriting. “Chocolate, please, and thank you. You’re the best!” He traced the letters with his fingers and smiled. If he had the money, he’d buy you an entire chocolate shop. Because he didn't, he made sure to grab more than enough, anticipating that Alexei might try to steal some.

Thinking it over, he grabbed one more bar. “Just in case,” he whispered.

He grabbed some flowers for you, too, because you deserved them.

As he checked out, he balanced the reusable bags Bob insisted on using and tried not to sneer at the total. It wasn’t the worst shopping trip. He finished up a lot quicker than he expected. Maybe the two of you could go for a ride on his bike once everything was unpacked.

He managed to take your keys out of his pocket without dropping any of the bags, smiling again. Using your car was easier for shopping trips and he liked that it smelled like you. He was also one of the only people you trusted to drive your vehicle, which he prided himself on.

What he did not expect to see when he got to your car was a white ball of fur curled up on the hood. “What the hell?” he muttered.

His eyes flickered around the parking lot, and he listened for anyone calling out for a cat. The cat had no collar, and he had no clue if it had a name, but that didn’t mean it didn’t belong to someone. He liked to think someone would be in distress if their pet was missing, but he didn't hear or see anyone come out to claim it. It didn’t move either when he put the bags in the trunk and placed the flowers in the passenger seat.

What the hell was he supposed to do?

Putting his hands on his hips, he stared at the animal until it lifted its head. A pair of crystal blue eyes stared back at him, unafraid and not at all bothered. He had to smile because it strangely reminded him of you, unwavering and always willing to look right at him. “Hey there,” he said, tentatively holding a hand out. He didn’t want to spook the cat. “You lost? You're not hurt, are you?”

The cat’s fur was surprisingly pristine, but that didn't mean it wasn't in pain or sick. After sniffing Bucky’s hand, it meowed and bumped its head against his hand, making his heart melt. The fur was so soft, and he swore he heard a purr. It was adorable.

“Yeah, you're cute, but here’s the thing,” he said, shaking his head at himself since he was talking to a cat. “I can’t drive with you on the hood, so…”

As if the cat understood him, it stood up and stretched. He panicked for a moment when he thought it would scratch the paint, but there wasn’t a single mark from the claws. And instead of jumping onto the street like he expected, the cat silently walked right to him and stared into his eyes again.

An agile and stealthy little thing.

“...What?” he asked as they stared at each other down.

With a gentle meow, the white ball of fur placed its front paws on his chest and crawled into his arms. He stood perfectly still, wondering what he looked like at that moment; an imposing man in a leather jacket holding a bright white ball of fluff. It had to be a sight.

“Since you don't have a collar and I don't see anyone searching for you, I can take you to a shelter,” he suggested. The second the words left his mouth he knew it wasn't happening, and there was another meow, softer and sadder that had his walls crumbling.

“Listen, you really are cute, but I can’t just take you home.” He stopped with a huff. “I’ve never had a cat before. I wouldn't know what to do with you.”

The response was to further burrow itself in his arms. 

“I have crazy roommates,” he continued. The team was in a good place, but it didn't take away that they were an entire range of crazy. How could he throw a cat into the mix? “And what would my girl say?”

He just knew the idea of a pet would thrill you, especially since the cat was so cute. Though he couldn't just spring that on you, could he? And could he spring that on the team? It was their home, too. 

But the cat didn’t budge, content being in Bucky’s arms. He found that he was content, too. Had he become a cat person in a matter of seconds?

Just like when he met you, he was fucked. 

“Okay, here’s the thing,” he said, balancing the light creature in one arm as he took his phone out to call you. “I have to clear this with my girl, and when she approves because she will, we need to make sure you aren’t chipped or anything, okay?”

Looking at the feline, he had a feeling there was no chip, that there was no home or a family. He wondered if there was a reason she chose to lay on the car he drove today. Was it looking for its own family? A place to fit in? Wasn’t that what everyone wanted?

He could give it that.

“Hey.” He let out a happy sigh at the sound of your voice. “You still at the store?”

“Sort of,” he replied, chuckling as the feline curled up more. He wasn’t even sure if it was a girl or a boy. “That’s actually why I’m calling.”

“Is everything okay?” He could hear you moving around, likely heading to the door. “Do you need me to meet you?” 

“I’m good, thanks,” he promised, touched that you were ready to go to him. “Have I mentioned you're the best?”

Nothing like buttering up his girl before mentioning the cat. 

“You are the best. I wrote it on the list,” you said. He could hear you smiling. “But why are you trying to butter me up?”

Of course, you knew what he was up to. “Because we may need to make another shopping trip for some cat stuff,” he replied, holding his breath.

You paused on the other end. “Cat stuff? Why would we need to buy cat stuff?” you asked, gasping. “Bucky, did you get a cat?!”

He breathed out. At least you didn't sound upset. “Well. Um, hang on.” He pulled up the camera and snapped the best photo he could. After sending it to you, he didn't put his phone back up to his ear right away, knowing you were about to shriek. You were usually considerate with his enhanced hearing, but this was a very cute cat.

“Oh, my GOD!” The cat tilted its head when your voice rang out through the speaker, but didn't seem unphased otherwise. “I’m sorry I yelled.”

“It’s okay. You-”

“But that is the cutest fucking cat I’ve ever seen in my life,” you continued, making him chuckle. “Where did you find her?! Did you adopt her?!”

Bucky held her closer. “I found her on the hood of the car when I came out of the store, and why do you assume it’s a girl?” 

“That beauty is a girl. I just know,” you said with complete confidence. “Okay, we need a collar, bowls, food, a litter box, a scratching post… Ooh, a little helmet so she can go on rides with you!” That did sound adorable. “Hang on. I need to make a list.” 

He chuckled again at your enthusiasm. “Before we do any of that, we need to make sure she isn’t chipped,” he said, trying not to feel guilty for not doing that before calling and getting your hopes up. And what about her shots? Were those up to date?

“If she has an owner, we’ll fight them,” you said like it was no big deal. 

Mischievous blue eyes gazed up at Bucky, and he laughed all over again. “That’s my girl,” he fondly said. “And I think she heard you and agrees.”

“So, assuming all is well, we're keeping her?” you asked, trying to sound casual but he heard your hopefulness.

Bucky's heart picked up when you said “we” because it was a reminder that he had someone by his side. “Yeah, I think we are.”

“Yes! It’s about time we got a pet,” you said, careful to not shout this time. “And cats choose their people. You know that right?”

“You think so?” he asked. 

“I know so. She was sitting on the hood of my car in a parking lot, and I think she wanted you to find her. And judging from the photo you sent, she looks right at home curled up against you,” you said. He wondered if that would've been the case had he been on his bike. Would the outcome be the same? “I’ll bet you two are kindred spirits.”

“Just like us,” he said. Pieces that just fit together. 

Your happy sigh made him smile. “Just like us,” you agreed. 

“Let me bring her by so I can drop off the food, and then we’ll take care of everything.” 

“Ten bucks says she hisses at John and adores Bob,” you teased. You were probably right. “I can’t wait to see you!” 

“I can't wait either,” he said, glancing down when he heard the soft meow. 

“I was clearly talking to her when I said I can’t wait to see you.” You giggled when Bucky growled. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Drive safe.”

“I will.” He exhaled once you hung up. “Well, that went well.” He helped the cat into the car and placed her next to the flowers. “You’ll love my girl. She’s the best.”

The beautiful feline meowed and curled up on the seat. He realized he’d have to come up with a name for her. Something special for such a beautiful cat, something that fits well. He had a feeling that the right name would come to him by the end of the day, or that you would help him if he got stuck.

“I think you’ll like the gang, too. They’re…” Bucky tapped a finger on the steering wheel. “They’re something.”

The team had been lost in many ways before becoming their own crazy sort of family.

Before he could stop himself, he said, “I know what it's like to be lost, but I’ll take care of you from now on, okay?” She lifted her head and stared with knowing eyes before he pet her head. Satisfied when she meowed, he smiled and started up the car. “Let’s go home.”

Had to bring Alpine in, okay? Love and thanks for reading! ❤️

Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

[64reprieve]

picture you (e.w.) ˙✧˖°📷 ༘ ⋆｡˚

pairing: butch!college!loser!ellie x femme!camgirl!reader

synopsis: you need promo for your business. ellie’s tuition is due.                         or ellie’s a college student in her junior year scrambling to get her shit together and desperate to make ends meet with side jobs. you need pictures taken by someone who isn’t a creep from craigslist and won’t kill you. your friend knows just the person.

content: angst, fluff, smut, amateurphotographer ellie!, loser!ellie, butch!ellie, soft dom!ellie, sub!reader, femme!reader, camgirl!reader, therapy session, substance use, dubcon (both parties are inebriated), miscommunication, explicit language, oral sex, pussy slapping, dry humping, cum-eating, spit-play, degradation, praise, gags, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, mentions of aftercare

word count: 5.7k

nsfw, men and minors dni

prologue ➤ chapter one ➤ chapter two ➤ chapter three ➤ chapter four ➤ tbd.

Ellie flinched at the crash of her door bouncing off the wall; sitting up wide-eyed and irritated. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” She cursed, facing her laptop screen filled with pictures of you, away.

Riley groaned, flopping on the end of the bed and bunching her space-themed duvet, “She’s not back yet. You can keep me company instead.”

“Yeah, right,” Ellie scoffed, poking Riley’s shoulder with her sock, “I’m kind of busy right now.” She said, placing her laptop on her lap.

Riley scowled, poking Ellie’s eyebrow, “When did you do that? Joel’s gonna kill you.”

Ellie hissed, smacking Riley’s hand away, “Watch it– fresh piercing.”

Riley tutted, laying on her side, “And you wonder why you have no money.”

“Hey, I know how to save money! I shop at Aldi.” Ellie defended, moving her cursor around mindlessly.

“Yeah. So you can spend the rest on tattoos and stupid shit,” Riley commented, “And I looked in the fridge. There’s a case of five dozen eggs, some ground beef, and like two rotting bell peppers.” She cackled at the absurdity, “Dude, what the fuck are you eating?”

“There’s milk too,” Ellie sighed, licking her teeth unamused, “Where’s Dina?”

“With Jesse. She said she’d be here soon.” Riley shrugged, hitting her vape.

Ellie clicked out of the folder of your photos to check her buzzing phone.

Riley sat up to lie down by Ellie’s legs, “Oh, so you do know how to answer texts!”

“Shut up.” Ellie said, smiling as she typed.

Riley quirked an eyebrow, eyeing Ellie’s phone.

“None of your business.” Ellie replied coolly, letting her phone rest on her chest.

She flipped her phone over as it pinged again. 

“Are you talking to someone? Done with abstinence?” Riley joked.

“I’m not talking to anyone.” Ellie protested, lightly kicking Riley’s leg.

Riley nodded with disbelief, “Uh huh.” She smirked, “Who is it?”

Ellie sighed, locking eyes with Riley, “I don’t have time for that shit anymore.”

Riley nodded slowly, pursed her lips then grabbed Ellie’s phone from her side; her smile dropping when she read the contact name.

“Dude, what the fuck– don’t do that!” Ellie scolded, snatching her phone back.

“That’s not who I think it is.” Riley blurted, pointedly staring at her.

“You tell me.” Ellie challenged with a cocky grin.

“El, I love you but I’m serious.” She insisted, “Leave her be.”

“Calm down, it’s just work.” Ellie replied, patting Riley’s shoulder.

Ellie’s gaze didn’t waver as she stared back. Riley squinted, taking a hit of her vape before blowing the banana-scented smoke in Ellie’s face. 

“Asshole.” Ellie exhaled, closing her eyes.

A loud thud from outside of the room caught both of their attention. Riley slipped off the bed, sticking her head out of the open door. 

“Di? Are you okay? What happened?” Riley pleaded.

Dina whined loudly before running into her room, “We broke up!” 

“Oh fuck.” Riley said, hurriedly following Dina into her room.

Ellie shook her head, listening in on the two. She heard a sob followed by shushing.

────୨ৎ────

“Hello?” You spoke into the phone pinned between your cheek and shoulder as you drove.

“Boo. Where are you?” Riley asked teasingly.

“I’m driving.” You answered, pulling up to a red light.

“That’s perfect. I’m at your place, so I’ll see you soon.” Riley claimed.

“What? Why are you there?” You questioned

“I’m waiting for you so we can leave.” She quipped.

You sputtered, “What? To where?”

“A friend’s. Sleepover at dorms– Dina got dumped.” She explained.

Dina. You remembered her. One out of many of Riley’s friends you’d met in passing. The last time you’d seen her was at Abby’s going away party. She’d drunkenly complimented your shoes when you came in before she threw up in a patch of Gardenias, and a taller guy ushered her elsewhere.

You arrived at your apartment with a hazy mind, digesting the session with your therapist. Rarely did you live outside the words spoken in her office, but you could meet with a semblance of normality, if only briefly.

“Hi, hot stuff,” Riley greeted, sitting at your kitchen island with a steaming mug. Of course, she’d made herself at home. You lived through her boldness at times. 

“Make sure you pack a toothbrush.” Riley called out, as you brushed past to your bedroom. She came in seconds later, sitting at your desk and testing your perfumes on her wrist. 

“I thought you had class today.” You noted, hanging up your jacket.

“I do.” Riley confirmed.

You breathed out, hopelessly staring into your trashed closet, “What do you think I should wear?”

“Anything,” Riley replied, using your sticky notes as sample strips, “We’re probably just gonna eat and watch something.”

“It’s not gonna be– do you know how many people are going to be there?” You ask, picking at your cuticles. You were trying.

“Barely anyone,” She reassured, catching your tension, “It’ll be us, Dina, of course, and Ellie. Cat might come but she hasn’t responded yet.”

Ellie? That piqued your interest. 

Your head snapped to look at her, “Ellie’s gonna be there?”

Riley turned away, “Yeah. They’re roommates.”

Any plans to show up in your pajamas went right out of the window. You showed up freshly plucked and in your best dress with a pair of new shoes straight from the box. You wore a butter-yellow dress partnered with brown ballet flats and white knee socks; your curly hair pinned back with deep red, cherry pins.

Riley had taken one look at you and called you the funniest person she knew when you emerged from the bathroom.

Out of courtesy, you asked her to stop by a flower shop on the way over. 

Dina thanked you profusely and set the bouquet on the kitchenette counter.

“Riley, who did you–” Dina groggily groaned, brightening when she spotted you behind her, “Oh, you– thank you! This is so sweet.” She whined, letting you two in. You slipped off your flats, noticing a familiar pair of tattered Converse by the door. 

Dina wiped her nose, filling a vase with water. Her oversized shirt stained with water which splashed from the sink as she stared off emptily, hair tangled and cheeks blotchy. 

From what Riley told you in the car, this wasn’t their first breakup.

You wouldn’t be able to tell from her appearance.

The afternoon flew by with insurmountable details of their relationship exposed and cases of overly sweet seltzers from the fridge. 

Riley sat behind with Dina between her legs, detangling her hair as she nodded along and encouraged her rants. 

“–And he was like, ‘We’re fighting too much and it’s not healthy’." Dina mocked his deep voice, wiping a stray tear, “What does he know about healthy? His parents are divorced!”

You lay on the rug, listening in awe and occasionally switching the music on the speaker but you couldn’t stop your mind drifting to Ellie’s whereabouts as more time passed. There wasn’t a chance you’d bring it up to either Riley or Dina given the gravity of the situation, so you kept it to yourself, counting down the hours without her presence. 

Internally, you scolded yourself; you were here to provide support, not see Ellie. 

There was a muted shame growing within you since you two had met, abated by an undeniable truth; you liked her.

Whether it be out of desperation for human connection or divine destiny, you didn’t care. You convinced yourself it was okay because you had no plan to pursue her, but it became harder to believe after you’d gotten off to the thought of her on your last stream. 

A lot of sleep was lost that night and you didn’t log in again until two days later. You were mortified.

Indiscretions were naught the minute Ellie returned to the dorm; holding two large plastic bags, “I’m back with food.” She called out.

She didn’t look over, setting the bags down on the counter beside the flowers, “Who died?” She joked, grabbing cans of soda from the fridge. 

Dina clicked her tongue, tilting her head and looking between you two pointedly. Ellie understood the hint, spotting your figure lying on the rug.

You looked adorable!

She bit her cheek, hiding her face by busying herself with unwrapping the food, “They smell nice.”

Don’t fucking blush, stupid, she thought to herself.

“What’d you get?” Riley queried, stretching as she stood up from the couch. 

“Taco Bell.” She answered, tossing the empty bags into the trash.

Riley grabbed the cans and food with Ellie, bringing it over to the coffee table. 

Ellie plopped a box of chocolates and lotion-infused tissues on Dina’s lap, “Here, Di.”

She found her way to the beanbag in the corner, manspreading as she took a bite of her burrito, distracted by her phone, feet inches from yours. You peered at her from your peripheral; her blue jeans had shifted lower on her lips, black boxers peeking through. There was a stripe of ink poking out, and you clenched your teeth. She wore a white wife beater, abs printed beneath and revealing her muscles. More tattoos teased under her clothes, on her collarbones, and littered her bare arms. Ellie wasn’t necessarily big but she was built. 

You sat up, grabbed something from the pile then tucked in. 

“It took you long enough.” Dina teased, “Did you forget about me?”

“I stayed back to ask my professor a question and I bumped into Cat. She’s not coming by the way.” Ellie told.

“Hm. Why?” Dina chewed, cupping her hand to catch her food. 

“Her car wouldn’t start so I gave her a jump. She called her dad after.” Ellie shrugged.

Riley clicked through movies on the TV, tossing the remote on the coffee table, “Fuck it. I don’t wanna look anymore.”

“Smoke?” Ellie offered, shifting her legs.

“Please.” Dina sighed, kicking off her blanket.

Dina stood up, opened the windows then went into the bathroom. Ellie went into her room, returning with her backpack. She tossed it on the couch, rifling through it. Riley sat up, looking over. 

Ellie smirked, “You don’t wanna do that.” 

Riley faked a gag, sitting back and catching the Ziploc bag Ellie threw into her lap.

You watched as they moved methodically; Dina returned from the bathroom with shower caps, placing them over the smoke alarm. 

“Backwoods.” Riley groaned, opening the bag, “You’re a monster.”

Ellie hummed, sitting between her and Dina, “I can put them away instead.”

Your eyes fixed on the blunt between her lips, the tip burning orange as she breathed in. Her eyes met yours. 

Dina and Riley passed theirs back and forth, while Ellie had her own.

“Do you smoke?” Ellie piped up, smoke billowing from the corner of her mouth.

“Not really,” You paused, “But I can.”

You’re not sure why you said that. You could drink, but you couldn’t smoke to save your life.

“Do you want your own?” She asked, already holding the bag.

Riley gave you a strange look, shaking her head before looking up at the ceiling. Dina fidgeted with the remote to find a movie, the constant clicking sound in the room.

Ellie waved you over with two fingers, “You can share with me.” 

You moved over, sitting between the couch and the coffee table. Her hand lowered, passing the blunt to you. It felt odd between your fingers. You said a prayer in your head before taking a hit, replaying the first time in high school when Abby had taught you how to smoke. You cheered internally when you were able to hold it without coughing, tucking your dress over your legs.

I should smoke more, you thought to yourself after a while, gaze fixed on the bright screen ahead of you; some cheesy romance at fault for Dina’s sniffling.

The room was dark aside from the light leaking out of Dina’s room and the glow from the TV.

You leaned back, sitting between Ellie’s legs; her knees surrounding your ears. Her gaze burned the back of your head, hand wrapping around to hold the blunt in front of your face. You leaned in, taking another hit, smaller this time. The smoke pricked your throat.

“Do you want more?” She drawled a whisper from above you.

You shook your head, fighting a shiver, as you whispered back, “No, thank you.”

The credits rolled, and you moved away from the couch, stretching with a yawn. Riley groaned with Dina, following her into the bathroom. Ellie stood up wordlessly, disappearing into the same bathroom before returning with a handful of things. She flicked on a small light, brushing her teeth at the kitchenette sink. 

Sluggishly, you stood up and found your bag. Riley squeezed your arm and mumbled a good night to you, stumbling into Dina’s bedroom, complaining about the brightness. Ellie turned the sink off, brushing past you and into her bedroom. 

You squinted, swaying into the empty bathroom, cleaning up and changing into a white slip,  your eyes squeezed shut. You felt like a zombie as you made your way to the couch. You should’ve known better than to gauge your limit off of how normal you felt sitting in the dark.

Floorboards creaked, grabbing your attention.

Ellie leaned against her door in soft, red plaid pants, arms crossed against a black t-shirt.

She spoke hoarsely, “You don’t have to sleep out here, come on, it’s fucking creepy.”

Too mentally preoccupied and relieved to argue, you entered her room. Ellie set up a makeshift bed on her floor. Through the blurriness, you felt a sense of delight. She glanced at you, tilting her head toward the bed, “The bed’s yours.”

“I couldn’t–” You doubted.

“I’m serious. This is better for my back anyway.” She insisted, tossing a pillow on the carpet.

You didn’t have it in you to disagree, tucking yourself into Ellie’s bed. Your head met the pillow first, like an anchor. The sheets were a thick, dark blue weight over you. They smelled of her, and you pulled the sheets under your nose for more, closing your eyes. Ellie turned off the lights, switching on a fan; the flicker through your eyelids disappeared. You muffled a groan, head spinning.

Ellie stirred, whispering gravelly, “Are you okay?”

Another groan when you tried to speak, words dragged down by a flood of nausea. Your heart was in your ears. You heard some shuffling, then saw the gleam of the bedside lamp. 

Calloused hands cupped your face, thumb brushing your cheek as she looked down at you worriedly. 

What was happening to you?

“Do you want to sit up?” She asked worriedly.

Your eyebrows twitched. If you lifted a finger, you might throw up.

Ellie’s hand slipped into yours, squeezing lightly, “Hey, squeeze my hand for yes.”

It sounded like you were underwater. You held your breath, squeezing back; you were going to be sick.

The back of her hand pressed against your forehead, “Think you’re just greening out.”

The dip in the bed disappeared for a minute; your panicking rose.

Ellie sat you up to sit behind you. Your back met her chest and she pushed the fan toward you with her leg. She reached over her nightstand for water, the other hand rubbing your arm in an ataratic motion. 

“Take a sip, you’ll feel better,” Ellie suggested, resting her chin on your shoulder to be close.

You drank slowly, chest stuttering with uneven breaths. She shushed you, “It’s just a feeling. I’ve got you. Deep breaths.”

It was a good thing you weren’t sober, otherwise you’d have melted through the floor out of embarrassment long ago. 

Your body cooled, your carousel of a brain slowing. Ellie rummaged through her drawer, holding a peppermint against your lips, “You just have to suck on it. The sugar will help, I promise.”

You conceded, taking the sweet into your mouth and letting it melt against the roof of your mouth, “I’m sorry.” You mumbled.

“Don’t be.” She answered.

Silence passed before your body allowed your reprieve.

Your back left her, rubbing your eyes with deep breaths. When you looked back, she gave you a tired smile.

You smiled back, turning to face her, “Thank you. That’s never happened to me before, sorry.”

“Don’t be.” She repeated, leaning against the headboard and looking over you.

“I fucked up your sleep.” You blurted, sheepishly.

“You didn’t. I take forever to fall asleep.” She reassured.

You nodded, looking away. The embarrassment was setting in. You spit the mint into the trash bin beside her bed.

“Sure, sobered me up though.” She joked.

You smiled small, “I don’t think I can go to sleep after that.” 

“Me either.” She agreed.

You shrunk into yourself awkwardly, disguising it as a stretch. Ellie patted the spot beside her, placing her water bottle in your lap.

“Is Dina going to be okay?” You asked, tucking your legs under the blankets.

Ellie nodded, turning her neck to look at you with a half-lidded gaze, “She’ll be okay. They've been breaking up for the past two years.”

“Oh.” You responded.

“Something like that.” Ellie nodded.

Her room was quaint, as expected from a dorm but it was thoroughly decorated, space naturally taken up through the past few years. Her laundry bin was overflowing, and her dresser was messily painted with and scratched with doodles. A knife stuck out from the top where it stabbed beside a small TV crowded next to a console. Her skateboard propped up against the wall adorned with posters of bands and video games, a neat stack of books piled underneath her desk. 

“You have a lot of tattoos.” You mumbled shyly, fixated on her arms.

Ellie hummed, holding her arm out to you and turning it over, “I hardly notice them now.”

“When did you get your first one?” You asked, watching her fingers prod at a patch on her forearm.

“This one,” She pointed out amusedly, “I had a friend do it for my sixteenth birthday. Luckily, she had experience— not that I knew.”

Your eyes widened, eyeing where ferns met the moth, “That’s a big commitment for sixteen.”

She let out a short laugh, “Tell me about it. My dad nearly ripped my arm off.”

Your insides bloomed warmth at her laugh. A moment ago, you’d been a mess, convinced you’d never live tonight down, now you were having a first proper conversation with her.

“Do you have any?” She asked, scanning you briefly.

“No.” You smiled, sheepishly, “But I like yours.”

“Thanks, pretty.” She slipped out, “I like them too.”

If you weren’t so overwhelmed, you would have caught it.

She cleared her throat, “Did the pictures turn out well for you?”

“Yeah, they’re perfect. Thank you. You did me a huge favor, you have no idea.” You chirped.

“Good, good.” She paused, “Hope your boyfriend appreciated them–otherwise you might turn out like Dina.”

You tilted your head. Boyfriend? Where did she get that idea from? Did she not know–

“I don’t have a boyfriend or anything.” You interjected, stuck on the word.

Ellie’s eyes met yours.

“I’m a lesbian.” You blurted.

An awkward pause blanketed the room. 

Ellie cleared her throat, “That’s– cool. Me too.”

You bit back a smile, raking over her appearance, “I mean– yeah.”

The corner of her mouth tugged up, feigning offense, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I didn’t mean anything by it,” You defended, gesturing toward her appearance, “You know, you’re just so–”

Ellie cut you off. She shifted resting her arms over her knees, “I’m so?” She drawled.

You inched back out of instinct, holding your breath. Ellie followed naturally, green eyes searching yours gently, “Hm?”

Your expression softened under her gaze, discreetly clenching your thighs. Ellie’s eyes flicked down to your lap, knowingly, cupping your knee. 

Your chest tightened with anxiety; alarm bells sounding off in your head. 

This wasn’t you.

Thorns crowded your throat, tightening in punishment; don’t fuck this up, don’t compromise yourself, you don’t know what this is, you don’t know what you’re doing, you’re both just high and drunk, you’ll regret it by morning.

You begged yourself, for what, you weren’t sure.

Ellie’s voice grounded you, hushed, “Should we call it a night?”

How much longer could you live, backing yourself into corners and never coming out? Holed up in your apartment for two more years, sitting in your car and talking yourself down for an hour before you could enter the grocery store. Lying to therapists, doctors, and your best friend then breaking down when your reflection turned unrecognizable. The monster wasn’t chasing you anymore, yet you pushed yourself to run until the asphalt bled beneath.

You’d been a shell this whole time, and you just wanted to be whole, even temporarily. You wanted her to be the one to do it. 

Ellie’s eyes widened when you pressed your mouth against hers. 

The sound reverberated within your bones and you dissolved just as she caught you; holding your waist and guiding you closer. 

She tasted of whiskey and smoke, melting into the sugary sweetness that clung to your tongue. You weren’t sure where to place your hands. 

The silk of your slip dress tickled your sides, fingers palming the material and riding up further when she lifted you over her thigh. 

Your eyebrows knit, breathing against her as she pressed gentle kisses to the corner of your mouth, murmuring, “Tell me you want this too.”

“I want this.” You whispered back, shakily, hands finding solace on her shoulders. 

I want you, Ellie thought to herself.

Her pouty lips trailed down your jaw and neck, to your collarbones, painting it with flowers of purple and pink like the canvases she slaved over in secrecy. You bit your lip, drawing a sliver of blood. Her head pulled back, kissing it off like a second thought as if you weren’t to blame.

For once, you were in the present— not floating through the minutes, turned to days, turned to weeks as you’d always done. You felt every breath flow through you. You were someone again.

You inched further into her lap, straddling until your knees kissed the headboard behind her. 

Hands roamed, feeling the ridges of Ellie’s abdomen over her shirt before slipping beneath the fabric. Her skin burned upon your palms. You pressed further, eager to see her.

Ellie peeled off her shirt as if she read your mind. You leaned down, kissing between her tape-plastered chest until your lips tickled against the fuzz of her happy trail, drawing a shaky sigh from the woman. A firm hand carded through your hair, bunching it. You paused, mouthing over the bulge in her pants, looking up at her.

Gentle fingers stroked the back of your neck, her smile growing at your appearance. She let out a low breath, stomach twitching as you stained a wet patch on the fabric. A free hand tilted your chin up, two fingers slipping into your mouth. You latched on, moaning around them. 

Ellie watched in disbelief, lips parted as a blossoming flush spread to her neck. Her fingers pressed down, opening your mouth. Drool gathered at the corners of your lips, dripping on her hips as her fingers stroked the muscle, milking your tongue for more until your chin was thoroughly soaked in spit. 

“Fuck.” She cursed under her breath, brushing your hair out of your face.

“Ellie.” You whimpered, catching your breath.

“Come on, pretty.” She said, arm hooking behind your thighs to pull you closer, “Let’s take care of you.” 

You straddled her lap once again and she pressed a kiss to your forehead, pulling your dress up to your waist. Her finger hooked into the band of your underwear, tugging your ankle to slip the fabric off entirely. Your blue ruffle panties lay discarded on the duvet and you hissed at the cool air exposing you, thighs trembling as you held yourself up over her lap. 

Ellie’s hand gripped your face, kissing you tenderly.

“You want to ride me, baby?” She asked, huskily.

Your neck could’ve snapped with the force you used to nod.

She called you baby! 

“Yes.” You confessed, melting into the hold that positioned you over her.

Ellie’s hand smacked your thigh lightly, urging you to sit. Your center met her bulge with a whimper; she shifted you so the patch of saliva you’d left previously, soaked against your clit. It was warm and unavoidable, and obscene. You were going to cum before you even moved.

“Please, what?” She taunted, smirking at your reaction.

You whimpered, pressing your hips down, “Please, daddy.”

Her eyes widened in a fleeting moment, schooling her expression into neutrality. She didn’t expect you to say that, but she could work with it.

“Yeah? Give daddy a kiss, baby.” She whispered.

Your spit-soaked chin knocked into hers carelessly, tilting your head to be closer as your lips locked. You wanted to blend, to live in her skin, and never leave her. 

Veined hands eased your hips against her, rocking you back and forth. She swallowed your moans, letting out a choked laugh.

Was this happening? She was so fucked.

“Please, please, please, please.” Hurried from your lips as though you were possessed.

A heat pooled in your stomach, pulsing dangerously with each brush of your clit, sending shocks up your arched spine.

“Good girl,” Ellie praised, “I’ve got you, darling. Just hold on to me.”

Your arms wrapped around her shoulders, tucking your face into her neck to muffle your whimpers and obscenities. 

“Feels good?” She panted, squeezing your ass as she guided you.

You nodded, choking on your words as you groaned against her pulse, sweat building at your hairline, “I’m close.”

Ellie peppered your shoulder with kisses, paying the creaking bed no attention, “Soak my lap, darling. Show me how good you can be.” 

Your stomach tensed, sensation swirling thickly as your toes curled. You bit down on her shoulder as you came, drawing out a mumble of curses. You bounced feverishly, bumping her packer harder against her clit as you rode your high with greed. 

Ellie’s eyes fluttered shut, nails digging into the crease of your thighs, “So fucking good— keep going. Shit.”

She came shortly after, taking it out on your neck as her teeth nipped and marred the thin skin with bliss. You sank into her, cheek resting against her freckled shoulder.

Ellie moved you as a ragdoll, whispering praises in your ear when she turned you around on your knees, pressing flatly at the bottom of your spine to deepen your arch. Your elbows weakened, and you whimpered. She placed a pillow over her legs for your head to rest on, rubbing the front of your thigh. 

You leaned into every generous touch, reveling in her tenderness. 

A cry tore from your lips when you felt her fingers tease your wet cunt, smearing your release around your clit with her thumb.

Ellie shushed you, pinching your hip in warning, “Don’t be rude, keep it down. Everyone’s asleep.”

She stared at your center before spitting on it. Her saliva dribbled, running down the back of your thigh in a mixture with your cum. You moaned, gasping when her tongue licked to catch it; pulling the wetness back up and pushing it into your entrance with a squelch. Ellie’s tongue prodded desperately, lacking restraint. You twitched with each lap to your folds, slick noises rang in your ears, echoing within your skull like a mantra.

A slew of pleads and soft cries left you. Ellie pulled her head back with a sigh, grabbing your discarded panties. They brushed against your trembling lips in greeting, and your mouth parted to take it in. 

“There we go. Just needed some help quieting down, right?” She cooed, “Always so polite.”

Her arm hooked around your thighs once again, locking you in place before resuming her ministrations. You sobbed freely, muffled by the fabric gagging you. Hot tears pricked your waterline at a harsh slap to your clit. 

“Prettiest fucking pussy.” She exhaled, moaning at your taste, “How’d I get so lucky, hm, angel?”

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, toes curling and hands fisting the duvet as she ravaged you. Tears slipped down your burning skin and leaked into your ears. 

Ellie took notice, staring with adoration before mocking you, “It’s that fucking good, huh? Come on, don’t be selfish. Give me one more.”

You would give her anything— anything she asked for.

Whimpers clawed at your vocal cords, shaking at the oversensitivity coursing through. Ellie kept working you; sucking on your clit and flicking at it with her tongue, only holding you tighter without forgiveness the more you attempted to twist around for relief.

“Ellie, Ellie, Ellie!” You pleaded around the makeshift gag.

She hummed against your cunt in response, pulling a groan from you. It was happening again, building up tenfold. Your vision blurred. You shook your head as you reached back for her. Ellie’s hand interlocked with yours, taking out your gag with her other hand and replacing it with her cum-soaked fingers. 

Pacified by how much of her you felt; you went lax. 

Ellie groaned when you clenched around her tongue, flooding her mouth with release, vision turning white and tensing suddenly. Your orgasm tore you apart, placing pressure as far as your lungs in a manner you couldn’t stray from. Your legs numbed, your thighs trembled, and your mouth dropped open in a silent scream. Ellie cleaned you up with her tongue until you came to as a limp, twitching mess.

You whimpered, earning a kiss on the back of your thigh. Ellie moved carefully, barely making a sound; she pulled your dress back over your lower half, gathering your sticking hair from your sweaty neck. She rubbed your back until you sighed, observing your disassociated expression.

The lamp shut off with a flick. Rough hands kneaded your wrists with an unexpected tenderness. Faint kisses sprinkled your spine, then lifted you to her as she laid down. Your cheek squished against her chest and you hummed softly at another kiss to your temple. Ellie held you firmly, folding the blanket over both of your legs.

She stared at the ceiling without blinking, rubbing your arm with soft, attentive strokes, breathing you in until you fell asleep in her arms.

What happens now?

────୨ৎ────

Apathy weaved within you in the most inappropriate moments. To abscond the numbness, solitude is currency to imagine what could be. Four walls relentlessly alchemize to hermetic traps. You’re forced to resurrect before your feet can leave the ground. You’re always almost there.

“Have you considered what we discussed in our last session?” 

You picked at a loose thread on your sleeve, numbly, “I have.” 

“Great. Did you find an opportunity to practice or are you still deciding?” Brooke asked, crossing her legs in the sofa chair across from you.

It’s your fifth try. You’re grateful there aren’t legal repercussions to ghosting therapists, otherwise you’d be out of insurance. You chose a psychotherapist this time after an impulsive search on WebMD and managed to charm her well enough with your issues to earn yourself two sessions per week. There are weeks when you only attend to see the fish tank in her office; she’s unaware of this.

“I don’t think I’m ready. Sorry.” You mumbled, snapping the loose thread.

The ceramic scraped against the side table before she took a sip of her coffee. Steam fogged her glasses; she tucked them in her hair. 

She nodded, “There’s no need to apologize. Is there a specific aspect you’re struggling with?”

“No. I just need to think about it more.” You lied.

Brooke clicked her pen, scribbling. “You mentioned dinner out with friends. How was that?”

“It was good. My friend asked me to go and I knew most of the people there. It wasn’t very big, there were five of us at this Italian place I’d never been to, it was nice.” You divulged flatly.

“I’m glad to see you getting out of the house. Did you do anything fun after?” She asked.

“No. My friend dropped me off at home afterward.” You sighed.

She hummed, “Is this Riley, the friend?” 

You hum back in agreement, attention flicking to the clock.

“Outside of class and routine errands, have you socialized with anyone else since?” Brooke questioned, tilting her head.

You bit down on your lip, “Yes. I had someone come over. A friend of a friend. I saw them again after–with other people I know.” 

“That’s good to hear.” She shifted, folding her hands together, “You invited them over? What was the purpose?”

“I hired them to take pictures for work. I didn’t know them. We weren’t hanging out or anything.” You explained, withholding certain details.

“I see. How was the experience? Were you able to connect with this person?” She inquired.

You exhale, shaking your head, “It was good– I think. I wasn’t as nervous as I thought I would be, probably because she was a girl. She was pretty nice to me.”

“And this person was aware of your line of work, correct? You were comfortable sharing that with them?” She pondered, the spoon clinking against the edges of her cup.

“I mean, yes. I assume my friend said something. It was pretty obvious considering what I asked of them.” You disclosed, chewing your cheek.

Brooke hummed, pausing, “Why do you think it is that you struggle with casual tasks, but were able to invite this person into your home in a considerably vulnerable situation? ”

You bit your tongue, weighing your words carefully on what you could tell her and what she wanted to hear. That you gave up for a moment to act out of exhaustion and impulse to prove something to your detriment? 

A symbol of deliverance flags your need for fortification. You wanted reassurance through devastation; your neuroses to be justified. Kindness would’ve been easier to grant yourself in this way.

You’d opened up to the world’s wrath and received Ellie instead. 

Why the fuck did you meet Ellie instead?

“I mean– I was scared at first. I almost backed out but it happened so fast, I couldn’t say no. I–I don’t know. I think it was her. It made it easier that it was her. And my friend knows her so I think it’s easier to–to feel that way.” You stuttered, picking at your nails.

“And what way is that?” Brooke replied.

You swallowed thickly, “Safe?”

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ hiya, guys! i'm half asleep uploading this right now so i apologize for any overlooked typos. i really appreciate it when you guys leave feedback. it helps with improving my writing and many of them are so kind. also what's smut without fluff? anyways, enjoy the calm before the storm!

thank you!

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[pittrabbit]

warning: kind of inappropriate work behavior(??), reader wears thongs, robby is down horrendously bad, suggestive, smut, p in v sex, etc etc etc.

summary: after overhearing certain rumor about you, robby just can't get his head back in the game

word count: 3.8k

note: this is based off that one scene in er where some doctor tells carter you can see lucy's thong through her scrubs and the dumbass tries to get a peek

➽──────────────────❥

"one word: thong"

"really?"

"yeah. when the light hits right, you can see it under her scrubs."

those were the last words robby had the ability to register while he stood there finishing up some overdue charts.

he really hadn't meant to eavesdrop. it wasn't exactly a habit of his. in reality, he couldn't have really cared less about the gossip that had a tendency to spread around at the pitt. he just so happened to catch wind of it almost every time. blame his habit of being stationary at the nurse's station.

this time it just so happened that you were the point of interest in such gossip.

and the gossip in question got to him more than he could've predicted.

his mind zeroed in on the conversation as soon as the male PA mentioned your name. but it wasn't until the word thong was put in the same sentence that his mind went completely blank. whatever else was spoken after that went completely over his head. it was only white noise that he heard after that, charts completely forgotten as his hand stilled on the tablet he was working on.

everything else was a blur after that. he wasnt really sure how long he sat there before dana nudged him on her way to her station, giving him a confused tilt of her head in curiosity at his odd behavior.

he shook his head after that, clearing himself of the thought for the time being. he felt like an absolute pervert being affected like this. what was going through his head? why did he even entertain the thought of overhearing a conversation just because you were the subject matter? he had no business caring about your personal life, much less about rumors some other doctors were bringing up about you.

he tried to focus on work after that, to keep his mind away from any thoughts of you. he had to see you in a bit, make eye contact without letting his eyes stray south as soon as you turned around.

it was going to be a long shift.

➽──────────────────❥

dana had been eyeing him ever since.

it was easy for her to put two and two together, chuckling at his adamant effort in avoiding eye contact with you whenever you'd show up in the same room as him.

he kept his eyes low, way too low — on your feet, on your badge attached to your hip, just not on you. it was comical to dana, really. she hadn't seen robby this flustered since, well, ever.

the rumors were true as far as dana knew.

not only could she see the 'under the right lighting' argument, but she had also seen you change in the locker rooms. the thong thing wasn't really a secret among the female members of staff. you weren't particularly shy when changing into your scrubs on the occasional extra shift, those days when you came in wearing your outside clothes and needed to change into the appropriate apparel for work.

still, it was funny that some stupid, jock PA's found it as good gossip material. it was 2025, a girl's choice of underwear wasn't that scandalous anymore.

robby, however, dana knew, was nearing old man status. so, receiving information that his controversially young work crush was donning such an illicit piece of apparel under her clothes had the expected effect on his poor, old, soul.

she could see robby's soul leave his body any time you came around, any time you rounded the counter and your back faced him. he couldn't have been more obvious about it, looking away as if he'd been burned, jumping out of the way when you passed by. he was far too respectful for his own good.

it made dana sad to see sometimes. maybe if he had all those worries about being inappropriate out of his mind, he could've landed on the conclusion that the interest was mutual.

dana was an observant woman, perhaps the most observant out of everyone else in the building. no word made its way through the department without passing through her ears first.

of course she had caught wind of your crush on the emotionally constipated attending.

she hadn't even needed to hear the rumor about it (because of course there had been hushed talks of it). her eyes had landed on you checking robby out countless times. she had registered the flushed cheeks whenever robby threw off his hoodie, she had heard the stutters when he'd praise your work. and most of all, she had noticed your discouraged demeanor when robby began avoiding you all day, your poor eyes reflecting the confusion behind his behavior.

idiots. the both of you.

➽──────────────────❥

"okay, uhm, is the pressure right, or should i-"

"no, you're doing great. just make sure you don't— yeah, that's it. good job."

robby was arguably standing way closer than he needed to be, he knew that.

he was never this attentive to other students of his (maybe whitaker once or twice, but he couldn't help himself; he saw a bit of himself in him). and he knew other attendings took note of his preferential treatment towards you.

however, this time he had a perfectly acceptable reason to stand over you as you stitched up some drunk guy's eyebrow laceration. you hadn't done your plastics rotation yet, mostly keeping your focus on trauma. you were hesitant to mess up this guy's face, robby had noticed it within seconds. he knew how to read you by now, having stuck around you long enough to get your moods in advance.

when you seemed to have the hang of things, he sat back, watching you and santos work on the guy on your own.

he stuck around just in case, knowing the flight risk of inebriated patients, aware that despite santos being there to help you out, he didn't trust leaving you two alone in a room with some guy.

but sitting back was his a terrible mistake. or at least sitting where he did.

because just as he let his back lay on the recline of the chair, he realized that his view was the source of all his problems that day.

he had the perfect angle of your backside, with you bending down slightly to get a good angle on the man's injury, giving robby a front row seat to your ass. and the lighting? well, it was as perfect as the PA had described. it gave robby what he was ashamed to call an amazing view of your ass.

the rumors had been true, by the way.

under the perfect lighting, he could see the line of your thong digging right into the plush of your ass, thin line disappearing between the cheeks.

he swallowed at the sight, eyes doing their best attempt at looking away but failing miserably.

not only could he see the outline of your thong, but he could see the perfect shape of your ass. it was the optimal view of you bent forward, the same view he'd have if he had you over one of the tables in the on-call rooms. he licked his lips at the thought, hand coming to rub at his beard in a distracted manner.

"dr. robby?"

it was santo's voice what broke his trance, forcing him to shake his head of any illicit thoughts before meeting her eyes.

there was a slight smirk on her face, a smug little grin that he'd gotten used to seeing from her any time she was able to one-up the other med students (which was pretty often, if robby was honest). but this time he was on the receiving end, and he didn't like it.

he looked to her left, finding you with a slightly shocked look on your face, eyes looking to santos in amused confusion before finding his again, eyebrows raised and head tilting to the side in a questioning manner.

"y-yeah?"

"you with us, dr. robby?"

santos could be cruel sometimes.

"yes, sorry. i, uhm, just got distracted for a second there." he cleared his throat. "what'd you need?" his eyes were now as far away from your ass as humanly possible.

"just wanted you to check my work." this time it was you, voice sweet as ever. but still, there was a mixture of shock and smugness in your eyes, mirroring that of santos'.

he got up slowly, awkwardly, taking the few steps towards you and leaning over the man sat in front of you, hesitant in his movements as to not get too close. he was still close enough to get a whiff of lavender from your shampoo, but he willed himself not to react.

"yep. that's pretty good. great job, doctors." he clapped his hands to signify the end of his praise, taking a few steps back. "if you'll excuse me, doctors, i'll go check on whitaker and the rest now." he bowed his head down as he had a tendency to do, stepping away from the embarrassing scene in hopes he could will it away from having happened.

as soon as he was out of view, he grimaced at himself, wishing the ground would just swallow him whole.

his steps were fast enough that he missed out on the aftermath of his embarrassment, missed out on your questioning look towards santos and her cackle in return.

"was he checking out my ass?" you'd asked, a little shocked, yet weirdly flattered.

"i don't blame him."

➽──────────────────❥

"oh, fuck. i'm sorry, i didn't know there was anyone in here."

"oh, no. don't worry, i was just-"

"no, yeah, i'll leave. you just-"

"no! you can, uhm, yeah. i'll leave."

the awkward exchange didn't end there. nor did the constant interruptions of one another.

you'd just been in the process of falling asleep, having made yourself comfortable on the bed located inside the on-call room, lights off and blinds drawn already. the interruption had been robby's fault, but you couldn't find yourself being angry at him, instead offering to leave the room to him if he so wished.

you'd already sat up, any sleepiness leaving your body the moment you realized who had just walked into the room.

it just so happened to be the man you'd been thinking about all day.

it was difficult not to think about him. not when you knew he was also thinking about you.

catching him checking you out had felt like a bucket of ice water being dropped on you. there were times in which you'd catch him staring, in which you'd feel like he was giving you preferential treatment, but none of those instances held a candle to the blatantness of what had happened today.

santos had burst out laughing as soon as robby was out of earshot, confirming your doubts as to whether or not his eyes had been zeroed in where you thought they'd been. you flushed, biting your lip and looking down, only to be the next victim of santos' berating when she realized you'd liked it. you'd enjoyed the attention; that specific type of attention from that specific man.

the rest of your day was spent with robby in your mind. he'd become a parasite wedged in there, unable to leave your thoughts. your eyes went to look for him multiple times during the day, always finding him fleeing your gaze, not even trying to be subtle about his avoidance.

this was the first time ever since the incident in which you'd been able to get him to meet your eyes. you wanted to take the chance.

you were already up from the bed before he could attempt to walk out, your hand reaching out to his arm without so much as thinking. you were unsure why you stopped him, but you were glad when he didn't pull away.

"i- i should leave." he uttered, looking at you and then at the ground. he then took a deep breath, eyes squeezing shut before looking up at you once more. "i'm very sorry about today. that was- that was incredibly inappropriate of me. i have a lot of respect for you and-"

"do you want to see?"

his eyes nearly bulged out. the arm that was in your hold clenched, hardening under your touch.

"excuse me?"

you took a step forward, with the same delicacy you'd approach a wild animal.

"do you want to see if the rumors are true?" you looked up at him, mouth slightly agape.

"i- you- you know about that rumor?"

giggling, you let your hand slide down his arm, reaching his hand and grasping his fingers lightly. he was receptive of this, eyeing your intertwined fingers for a second before nudging you with his hand in return.

"yeah, of course i know. dana told me about it. silly rumor, isn't it?"

"oh, i wouldn't- i wouldn't really entertain it." he half chuckled, half scoffed, clearly uncomfortable by how forward you were being. yet he was still in the room holding your hand, eyeing you like he felt guilty for how hungry he was.

"no? you seemed awfully interested earlier."

okay, that was a little mean. but you had him right where you wanted him. all you needed to do was catch him.

he groaned. like, belly-groaned, chuckling humorlessly once more as he dropped your hand to run his hands down his face in mortification. his skin turned a few shades redder, ears now the shade of tomatoes.

"you're really fucking mean, you know that?" he said but didn't mean. he was easy to read in this moment. any man would be.

"i wouldn't call it mean. more like ... decided." you eyed him up and down, making your intentions as blatantly obvious as possible, adding a lip bite just for good measure.

"you haven't answered my question, by the way."

you took a few steps forward, leaving enough distance to give him a chance to reject you in the odd chance he wasn't interested (but you knew the truth by now).

he bit his bottom lip, hesitant in taking a few steps towards you, ultimately close the distance, but doing so in the end.

"i'd love to confirm the rumors." his hand reached for yours, interlacing them once more, "if you'd let me."

now close enough for comfort, your eyes lowered to his lips, chin tilting towards him in a challenging manner. it was time for him to make the next move, to brave that last step towards an hr violation.

and then he did, nose nuzzling your own for a few turns before closing the gap, eyes closed and lips open, taking your lower lip captive for an open-mouthed kiss.

sighing in relief against him, you grasped at his scrubs, pulling him inhumanly close. his hands remained reserved, but yours found every part of him you wanted to touch. they went under his shirt to feel up the creases of his back, to his biceps, grasping at the hard muscle, to his hair, his beard, to his hands, to lead them to your body.

finally, his hands landed on your ass, groaning into your mouth when they squeezed at the flesh, feeling the thin lack of fabric your lone scrubs provided, no underwear in sight. nothing but a tiny string.

"fuuuck, you really wear these to work?" he groaned in between kisses, almost growling when you took that chance to lick into his mouth.

"wanna see up close?"

he groaned again, gruttal, mindless, hands slipping under your scrub top to feel your skin. his flat palm drove itself up and down your back, pulling you closer, tracing at the strap of your bra when it came into contact.

"i wanna see everything." he breathed.

he reached down, fingertips finding the hem of your shirt and helping you throw it off. when he looked down, he found a red bra, a tiny gem at its center and soft lace trimming the cups. his hands reached up, hesitating in touching the lace, face leaning down to trace the freed skin of your chest.

"is it matching?"

hands now digging at his hair, you pulled him up to your eye-line, kissing his lips softly a few times.

"you should see for yourself."

this was all the permission he needed.

your bra was off in seconds, your scrubs being pulled down with zero finesse as you kicked off your shoes. it was a dumb idea to get fully naked for a quickie, but he was so receptive, so into you that you wanted to give him a full view of your body.

and he adored the view. he held no reservations in letting you know about this.

"fucking shit, kid. this what you've been hiding under those scrubs?" he groaned, grabby hands feeling every inch of your body, pulling you as close as possible before digging his tongue right back into your mouth. "gorgeous fucking thing."

you wanted him just as bare, your hands demanding he undress, earning a chuckle from him as he aided you in getting his clothes off.

"shit, robby." you sighed at the view, at the large expanse of skin now bare before you.

he was broader shirtless, his chest a landscape for you to kiss and mark up to your liking. short nails dragged up and down the expanse of tanned skin, leaving light marks across it before your lips joined in on the mix, sucking the odd mark here and there, some high enough they'd likely be seen while he donned his scrubs. the thought made you giddy.

it was only fair, seeing as he had his fun with your body, kissing, licking, sucking, grabbing, pinching at any inch of skin he had within his reach. there was no precision in his touches, all simply driven by sheer lust. the lazy desire in his eyes made your knees buckle, glad his strong arms were wrapped around you, providing you with the much needed support.

one large hand wrapped around your hip, trailing down to the back of your knee and wrapping your leg around his waist and pulling you up against him with little to no effort — his easy demonstration of his strength almost making your eyes roll back. he took a few steps with you half-wrapped around him, pushing you up against the wall and crowding you there with his large frame, mouth open as he captured your lips in his.

his hips began moving along with yours, making you gasp at the weight between his legs. you moaned and sigh, scratching at the skin of his back and shoulders, already way too affected to even think coherently. your mind was completely overtaken by thoughts of robby and how good he'd feel if he actually pushed aside that tiny string and made his way inside you.

it seemed he was just as needy as you, haphazardly lowering his boxers just enough to free his dick, now pushing it off against you with a groan. you were dripping by then, frustrated at your inability to form any actual words to beg for more.

"kid." he called out. "need you, fuck. this okay with you?" his nose nuzzled you, eyes barely open as they zeroed in on your lips, his own lips and his heavy breath circulating against you.

you nodded desperately, attempting to press yourself even closer.

"no, sweetheart. need you to tell me."

"please, robby." you begged, hips grinding against his with an embarrassing neediness.

he grabbed onto his dick, tucking it under your hip and between your legs, drawing it up and down the length of your pussy. your thong had been pushed aside already, leaving the perfect door for him to finally breach you.

"ohhhh, fuckkkk."

his groan was throaty, coming deep from his diaphragm. his lips chased yours quickly after, wanting to muffle himself as much as possible. still, you could feel him grumble and growl against you, the vibrations of his chest felt deep within you at the contact.

"feel so fucking perfect, sweetheart." he groaned. "god, how the hell are you this tight?"

he was way better off than you, at least able to form words. you were so full, so perfectly breached that you could do nothing but whine against him, cry and pant and wail his name, biting onto his shoulder any time his lips would leave your own.

and when he began to move, things got catastrophic for you.

he held no reservations, hammering into you with fervor, with so much desire you felt like you were well on your way to passing out. the strength of his thrusts created a nasty sound of skin slapping, the door hitting the wall with every rock of his hips. you were sure any bystanders would be able to guess what was going on on the other side of the door, but you didn't have enough of your faculties active in order to care.

"r-robby, fuck. so full..."

"yeah? tell me about it, sweetheart."

and you did. you babbled and cried, letting him know of every thought going through your head. some were nasty, some were nonsensical, but he loved every single one, you could tell. he'd either groan or bite your shoulder, praising you for how good and tight and perfect you were for him. he had you losing your mind, had your eyes rolling back and your mouth agape, drool practically seeping down your lips.

one large hand dipped between you, searching for your clit for a few seconds before striking gold, two long fingers circling it messily yet precisely enough to have you hiccupping with pleasure.

"you're gonna come for me, aren't you, baby? hmm?" he basically barked into your ear. "c'mon, do it for me."

it only took you a few moments to finally let go, having to bite the back of your hand in order to not scream out his name. your leg was burning from resting your weight on it, with the other one likely bruised by robby's tight hold, but any pain took a backseat to the blinding pleasure.

much to your dismay, robby pulled out a few moments later, using his free hand to work his dick between the two of you, groaning expletives when he finally let go, staining the window of skin between you; his chest, yours. you were practically drenched in his juices by the end of it.

"shit."

"yeah. shit." he chuckled, finally letting go of your leg and helping you balance yourself. when you began wobbling, he pulled his pants back up and helped you get back to the bed you'd been lying on earlier, sitting you down with a kiss to your hair.

"you good?"

you nodded, hand taking his, kissing the back of it and getting a soft chuckle out of him. he walked over to gather your clothes, handing you a rag from nearby to help you clean up, and proceeding to aid you in dressing up.

"so, did the rumor live up to its hype?" you giggled.

he rolled his eyes, chuckling, "you're going to make me tachycardiac, kid."

[ri-writes-if]

Chapter 6 is released!

You’ve been wandering in the darkness, but now the light is here, and it blinds you. Your vision clears, and you see it. You see the trap closing right above your head, leaving you with no way to escape.

The situation with Vezriel’s sibling becomes troublesome. Because of your abilities, you learn more than you should know. But it gives you a chance to see Vezriel from a side they show to few demons.

A strange vision promises you misery, though you don’t know why or how. Is it connected to Os? You can only guess, though you don’t have much time for it as Os pulls you back into the high society and shows you how they deal with some matters.

Perhaps Laz would’ve preferred to keep you at a safe distance, but when trouble knocks on the door of their home, Laz can’t refuse your help with an important matter. If you want your payment in honesty, you might just get it this time.

You and Ashmedai both walk closer to something you would rather not remember. For you, it is a painful reminder; for them, it’s another stone added to the weight of their guilt. They’re not prepared to give their last, most painful ‘secret’ to your judgment, but they must.

Az seems so simple, but the more you learn about them, the less you understand them. They’ve opened their home for you—which you never expected to happen—and have shown you unprecedented trust, but you still can’t stop wondering about what they’re hiding from you.

Over 100K words of new content!

Other updates/changes:

Content warnings are updated!

Added the Oracle’s appearance description and the characters’ heights to the profiles.

The relationship’s statuses will update almost at the end of the chapter, so take a peek at these 👀

Serif font is changed. I don’t think anyone cares, lol, but this one is easier to read.

A new hidden stat. It is an obvious one, so I’ll let you find it in the chapter. It’s not here to make or ruin your playthrough, so don’t fret about it and choose what is suitable for your Oracle! :) It’ll mostly give you additional flavor text depending on the other choices you make in the future.

There are lots of variables and branches at work, and I couldn’t go through all of them. So if you see something wanky, or a bug, or a double space line, or typos, or anything that sounds like it shouldn’t be in your specific playthrough/etc., please let me know! You can put it in the tumblr askbox, in the form, or message me directly anywhere.

LINK

I’ve been waiting for this chapter (this and the next one) for so long. When I was coming up with ideas for this story, the last scene of this chapter was among the first things I wrote down. At last you can guess where I’m leading the Oracle and what their journey will look like. Their journey and their growth... or downfall. And you’ll be the one to decide what it is and what the Oracle thinks of it :)

I wonder how many readers will be surprised by it and how many have been expecting it 👀 Let me know what you think about it!

@interact-if

[science-hoes]

When the words leave Jack’s mouth, your breath hitches. Your hands freeze on the keyboard, the cursor blinking at the end of your patient chart update. It feels like your whole world is collapsing in on itself, with your boyfriend’s statement at the center of the destruction.

You try to find the words to say, but they won’t come out, so you swivel in the rolling chair at the desk hub to face the computer he sat in front of, his impeccable posture indicative of every hour he was in the military. He doesn’t turn, but he can feel your desperate eyes burning a hole through his head.

“What’s wrong, love?” He asks, genuinely, but continues to click through his last patient’s chart.

You swallow hard, hoping that he had just been joking. “Why would you do that?” You manage say.

Jack furrows his brow as he leans closer to the computer screen until the text came into focus. He doesn’t everything except wear those damn readers you bought for him. “Do what?” He questions.

“Get a haircut.”

The words sting even as they cross your lips, stabbing up your chest and throat until they hit the cold air of the Pitt. Jack just shrugs.

“Because I basically have an Afro right now. It’s too much hair. Makes my head hot.” He mumbles in response.

You huff a laugh. “Don’t need all that hair for your head to be hot, Lieutenant Colonel.” You deadpanned.

Jack shot you a feigned glare of distaste before looking back to his screen.

“I feel like Bob Ross.” He admits distractedly, index finger tapping on the computer mouse.

You glide across the floor in your rolling chair until you bump into him. You stare at his whimsical salt and pepper curls that had been cultivating for so long. They’re just so pretty.

“But I like your curls.” You nearly whine. “And you always get your hair buzzed so short on the sides when you go.”

Jack chuckles and runs a hand through his hair, clamping a few curls in his fingers and unraveling them, stretching them out to show his real hair length.

“It’s too long. When I’m in the shower, my hair is almost in my eyes.” He explains.

You watch as the curls snap back into place on his head when he lets them go, taking in every moment you have left with them.

“This is my 9/11.” You pout, giving your boyfriend an unhappy glare.

Jack rolled his eyes, leaning back in his chair to stretch. “Do you even remember 9/11?” He questions.

You shrug, leaning your head on the back of your own chair, admiring his unruly hair. “Not really. But I imagine it felt just like this.”

He barks a laugh and places a hand on your thigh, squeezing gently, a rare instance of physical affection that you’re both slow to share out of respect for your coworkers.

“I promise I won’t get it buzzed on the sides as short as last time, okay?” He offers.

You think for a moment, wondering if you should accept his terms. You lean in closer to him, enough for your breath to ghost against the shell of his ear. “It needs to be long enough for me to grab. Gotta have something to pull on, ya know?”

Your whisper sends a shiver down the old man’s spine. Jack hums in fake thought, but he can’t suppress his signature side smile that crawls onto his lips. “Well when you put it that way…” He trails off, running a hand through his overgrown mane. “I guess I can tell them to leave the sides just a little long.”

You grin and squeak in victory. “I promise I’ll make it worth your while.” You tease before pushing off your feet and rolling your chair back to your computer.

Jack just watches you with enamored amusement, shaking his head with a chuckle before returning to his patient’s chart. You would’ve hated when I had to buzz my entire head for deployment, he thinks.

[sy1vs-3]

Dragon!Sylus x Royal!Reader

Suddenly thought about Dragon!Sylus and Royal!Reader. He stole us away just because of our eyes. Nom~

please enjoy... ♡

Dragon!Sylus, who was ready to burn down the royal palace because the royal family tried to steal his treasures — but whose heart skipped a beat the moment he saw your eyes.

Dragon!Sylus, who changed his mind about slaughtering the kingdom’s people, and instead took the greatest treasure the king had — you.

Dragon!Sylus, who couldn’t understand why you trembled in fear when he gave you all his hoarded gold and gems. Wasn’t this what greedy human hearts desired most? Wasn’t that why your father sent his finest soldiers into the dragon’s domain?

Dragon!Sylus, who draped silk over the mounds of treasure because you looked so delicate, and surely sleeping on bare gold would be uncomfortable for you.

Dragon!Sylus, who brought you ripe fruits after you stared at him in horror when he dropped a freshly killed rabbit at your feet. You needed to eat well, after all.

Dragon!Sylus, who guarded you day and night, proudly showing you each new treasure he found, and still couldn’t understand why you weren’t happy to see him — why you screamed, why you tried to run. He had given you everything you needed to be happy. The only rule was: don’t leave him.

Dragon!Sylus, who watched carefully as you fell asleep, then curled up behind you and held you close, because the fine hairs on your skin would stand on end from the cold.

Dragon!Sylus, who carried your handkerchief with him at all times, because it smelled like you—like the most beautiful flowers, and home. A place he longed to return to, always.

Dragon!Sylus, who brought you board games and books, because he’d seen humans enjoying such things, and wanted to do the same for you.

Dragon!Sylus, who listened to every word you said, even when they were desperate curses. He would take your face gently in his hands and stare into your tear-filled eyes for a long, long time.

Dragon!Sylus, who touched you so softly, so carefully — afraid he might hurt you, because your skin was just so fragile...

masterlist 🌸 please don't translate or copy without permission