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daydreamalley · 7 months

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The fact that there’s only one time in Chuuya’s life that Corruption was activated (outside of the lab) where Dazai wasn’t there in the aftermath and that was when Chuuya was just 7 years old and left in the crater of the explosion he created, in so much pain and with gravity probably still fluctuating around him. Nothing but complete destruction, hell on earth, and suffering for a seven-year-old child.

Chuuya is never in good shape after he uses Corruption, and I imagine he wasn’t in good shape after he used the full force of Arahabaki (and by used I mean when it was forced out of him due to Rimbaud). And like, we’ve seen Chuuya close Verlaine’s gate when he defeated the Beast of Guivre, and it left Verlaine close to death (though I also imagine that’s in part due to the fact Verlaine isn’t really human), and we also saw earlier on in Storm Bringer when Verlaine opened Corruption for only a second and then closed the gate that Chuuya was in agony, left to suffer in the hell of what was left of the street he’d been on.

That scene of Chuuya lying on the ground in what used to be an alleyway in excruciating pain is already hard to read, and he’s 16 then (still so young) but at least Dazai still comes (even though he doesn’t technically have to) and nullifies the aftershocks of Chuuya’s ability that are causing him so much pain. Causing him to suffer.

But imagine Chuuya at 7 years old, imagine how small that is, probably in nothing more than a hospital gown, lying in the rubble of the giant crater that will one day become Suribachi city, experiencing all that suffering and probably more. He’s completely alone in the hell of his own ability’s destruction, in unimaginable pain. His frail body that’s been in a lab for so long probably spasming with the pain as he feels the sun for the first time in who knows how long. And there was no one to hold him or catch him or for him to fall into. No one’s lap to rest his head on. No one to hoist him onto their shoulders and carry him away from the carnage. No one to nullify the pain he was in. No one to comfort him or remind him who he was.

What did he probably have to do when he woke up? Wait until he had enough strength to sit up, wait until the dizziness abated enough for him to stand, and through the disorientation walk on his own two feet despite the pain. He’d been through plenty of it after all, even if he couldn’t remember why, his body remembered.

He’d have to piece together any scraps of memory he had. His name probably came first. Then the horrific feeling of the power inside him and that he was probably responsible for the hellscape he was trying to navigate, cutting and scraping his bare feet in the crater of what was.

Find the corpse of some military personnel that’d been killed in the explosion Arahabaki had caused, far enough away he hadn’t been completely obliterated, and at least steal some of his uniform to wear, though it was much too big for his skinny 7-year-old frame. And the shoes wouldn’t do him any good, they’d just fall off, the jacket already kept slipping off his shoulder.

And then, in that moment, he was perhaps the loneliest person in the world. Not later, when he was 16 and had someone to catch him and someone had just attempted to sacrifice himself for Chuuya. No, then he had a semblance of a family. But when he was 7, that was when he was just alone, and in pain, with no one to reassure him that everything was alright, that nothing was his fault. That his destructive power didn’t make him less human. If anything, he was probably lucky no one with bad intentions found him.

And then who knows how long later, he’d wandered far enough away from the wreckage, under a bridge where a couple of other kids around his age found him. Still without shoes and in a military uniform far too large for him. Filthy and starving, but having the strength, having the courage to ask a kid “what’s that square thing?” “Tell me what that square thing is in your hand. Right now.” Last ditch effort of demanding, because somehow he still had a strong will. And the kid was just holding a slice of bread. Chuuya just wanted to know if he could eat it.

Like, can we just talk about the tragedy of that? How truly sad it is that when Chuuya asked “what’s that square thing” and the answer was just bread. Shirase just explaining“I was holding a slice of bread,” and then having to show him that it was edible. Like, my god. And then Chuuya just… faints, on the spot “like he was out of batteries,” as Shirase describes. Finally all his energy and willpower to survive depleted in this moment of hopeful safety. Shirase also says Chuuya looked half dead he was so skinny.

But at least Chuuya had finally found some people who’d given him some food and water. At least Shirase decided to take him to some shelter, even if it was in the sewers. He finally had people, even if they weren’t well off, they had something. Finally he wasn’t alone. And when he learned he had something to offer them in return in the form of his ability? Well, of course he was going to use it to help them.

Also, just, his first memory was of being alone and in pain. Where he is now may not be perfect, but thank god he’s come such a long way and has people and a home and food and luxuries. But like, he just has to live with that every day.

Oh, and mind you, all this was happening to Chuuya close to the end/in the aftermath of the war, which was already a bad time for people, as Murase talks about. He says “But it was the end of the war, and there were supply shortages everywhere you went. Some kids from the Settlement appeared out of nowhere and tried to sneak inside to steal some food.” So on top of Chuuya’s personal struggles, there were shortages of supplies everywhere, bad enough that kids were trying to sneak into military facilities for food.

So, yeah, this actually massively got away from me, into the territory of hcs and back out again. But like, every time we see Chuuya use Corruption Dazai is around, because he really has to be. And I love that. But just thinking about the one time where Dazai wasn’t around after the full effects of Chuuya’s ability and how that was probably the worst time and Chuuya was only 7 and alone and woke up in the middle of essentially hell on earth with like no memories. It makes me want to scream, and that’s why I wrote this. And then I reread the part in SB where Shirase explains how he met Chuuya and just got even sadder. Fun times fun times.

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bestworstcase · 4 months

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How likely is it do you think that there are/have been Grimm-based cults? I can't imagine there's Never been Grimm cults, and I'm particularly interested in the idea of there being Grimm cults or even just organizations who Actually Understand the Grimm and safely live alongside them. I think it's such a fascinating idea, I'm very tempted to come up with a mysterious faction that respects/admires the Grimm (like how people did/do respect forces of nature in religion) and (mostly) safely lives alongside them. Any thoughts?

two obvious paths. whether the second is viable depends on how well you trust my basic reading of the grimm as sapient beings who reflect back what they’re given—dark mirrors—but the first is textually sound without any extrapolation required.

#1: the grimm as gods of war

these are the salient facts:

the grimm follow groups of bandits around to scavenge in the wake of their raids

criminals in mistral sometimes use captive grimm to execute members of rival gangs

grimm are more strongly drawn by violent anger and hatred than by sadness, fear, or other negative emotions.

it’s possible (per ‘before the dawn’) for one side of a conflict to "ally" with the grimm in battle if the other side is, er, tastier

ok. imagine you have a region where most of the people live in small nomadic groups—perhaps a steppe or a desert, their subsistence base is herding—with smatterings of fortified towns and villages around the edges of the region where there’s arable land enough to support a larger sedentary population. the nomadic groups can’t produce their own weapons/armor (mines, smelters, and forges aren’t portable), so they’ll need to either raid or trade with the towns for that. and conflicts between these nomadic groups over territory and other resources are inevitable.

how do the grimm figure in this region?

well a) the grimm are going to be following the nomadic groups around, with more warlike groups attracting more grimm, and b) grimm will fight alongside people against a common enemy if their "allies" are calmer or otherwise less appealing.

this is like… a perfect storm for the nomadic groups to start venerating "their" grimm as war-gods, in tandem with fostering warrior-cultures that prize tranquility or joy and mercy in battle; there is no honor in hatred or rage or taking pleasure in killing (our grimm turn against those warriors who lose themselves to bloodlust), so a good warrior must be calm, decisive, and swift, and never prolong a fight unnecessarily. but it’s also beneficial to make one’s enemies fearful and angry, or provoke them into hatred.

all it takes is one or two warriors who kept a cool head in battle noticing that the grimm ignored them to go after another warrior who went berserk and then interpreting this as a moral judgment. historically, we know grimm were thought to be the vengeful or corrupted spirits of animals, or animals possessed by demons; both are understandings that encourage this sort of thinking. these are animal spirits that cannot rest because someone killed them without giving due respect, and now they seek to punish those who commit such wrongs… so we’d better take care to treat our adversaries in battle and the animals we hunt with honor and mercy.

and oh, we should pay our respects to the grimm, too. perhaps make some offerings. they eat the corpses of the slain after a battle, so… a) we mustn’t be wasteful when we hunt, it isn’t respectful, and b) we should consider the grimm in our funeral customs.

this is a very basic. BASIC human impulse. humans will try to propitiate the fucking sky because we’re so good at pattern recognition and also anthropomorphizing things that we’ll find patterns and read meaning into the most random coincidences. take that and add it to the fact that it legitimately is possible to form alliances with grimm… fgrhjsv

under these conditions grimm-worship probably tends to look something like:

warrior cultures that prize moderation, calmness, efficiency, and clever mockery or intimidation of the enemy in battle,

funeral customs that ritualize feeding the dead to grimm, and/or ritual sacrifice of captured enemies,

grimm viewed as battlefield psychopomps and/or patron spirits of warriors, whether as a class or as individuals or both, and

incorporation of grimm-like designs or motifs into armor and clothing of warriors, to intimidate enemies.

with wide variation in the details and elaborations. the reason for this common set of foundational practices is that religion is practical. it’s not arbitrary. it isn’t pretend. prayer and ritual are things people do because it works, or it’s believed to work, and the right methods are figured out through trial and error long before they coagulate into tradition. so with something like grimm, whose behavior really can be meaningfully influenced, similar patterns will emerge across different cultures because whether a given practice does or doesn’t work is a) more than random chance or coincidence, and b) extremely easy to identify because if it doesn’t work the grimm will attack you.

& #2, the grimm as nature gods

these are my presuppositions, based on extrapolation from the text:

the grimm have a physiological need for aura, which they can get by siphoning; they eat their prey in order to extract aura from the remains.

grimm attraction to emotions is akin to our attraction to the aroma and taste of food; strong emotions herald deep auras or excite aura so it’s more "nutritious" for the grimm, so they hunt by following emotion.

because aura/soul separates from the body at death, siphoning aura from a living person is much more efficient than killing and eating; grimm will prefer to be fed aura by someone alive over hunting if possible.

because aura can be channeled outward through tools, clothing, etc, it can also be channeled into a repository and stored for a while; this seems to be how the grimm lures in arrowfell work.

grimm are intelligent, emotional, social creatures who can learn to recognize certain groups of people as 'safe' or as friends/allies, without salem.

grimm reflect back the emotional energy they’re given; they’re not "attracted" to anger or pain per se, they just mirror it. bristle and draw your weapon at a grimm, and the grimm will charge at you. remain calm and retreat slowly, and the grimm will keep its distance too.

if all of these presuppositions are true, you can propitiate grimm by saturating an object with aura and leaving that out for the grimm on the regular. i imagine that organic/living things that naturally have aura would work best for this purpose; sacrificing an animal or a portion of your harvest is intuitive, and if fervent religious belief alone isn’t enough to infuse something with aura, then priests or religious officials whose auras have been unlocked and trained will do the trick.

if aura-saturated offerings aren’t possible, then you’d need someone with aura training to channel aura to the grimm through, like, a stick, or bare-handed if they were brave enough or confident enough. this is a more uncomfortable option (like physically) but we have a canonical example of a character doing it: she found it disconcerting, but not painful, and it’s implied that the grimm didn’t attack her at any point during. so a) it probably doesn’t do any more harm than having one’s defensive aura break, and b) stopping the flow of aura to the grimm by moving away won’t provoke the grimm to attack.

as unpleasant the prospect might seem, if it clearly worked to reduce or eliminate grimm attacks on the community, people would do this. people would absolutely do this. the big hurdle lies in discovering that this is possible—like you’d need someone to willingly approach a grimm, lay a hand on it, and channel aura into it without knowing what will happen, and the kind of person who would even think to TRY that is very rare—but once it was known? religious belief motivates people do all sorts of unpleasant, uncomfortable, or even outright painful and harmful things to themselves. fasting. self-flagellation. hermitage.

like… waves hands. if it’s a known thing in a community that grimm won’t attack anyone if a few people go into the wilderness every morning to stand there and pour aura into grimm who pass by until they’re tapped out for the day, lots of people will be fully willing and able to do that. far more than are willing and able to become huntsmen: it’s not dangerous or difficult, it’s just going to tire you out on your assigned days. and if you have say, a village of a hundred people of whom ten are able to do it, you can rotate so no individual has to do it more often than thrice a month. NBD.

and if nothing else except the emotional mirroring thing is true, then you can… more or less propitiate grimm by doing whatever, because in this case what makes propitiation effective is community belief that it works: if you and everyone else around you believes that wearing pendants carved in the likeness of grimm and pouring a libation of wine outside the village gates to entreat the grimm for safe passage through the wilds is effective in making the grimm leave you alone, then no one’s going to panic or raise the alarm upon seeing a grimm wandering around in the barley field, and the grimm won’t freak out either.

if you believe that a grimm is a being that can be appeased and you cross paths with one in the woods, you’re going to do what you believe will keep you safe; for a huntsman, that’s "draw a weapon and attack," but for you that might be "hold up your grimm pendant and recite a prayer to politely wish it well and ask for its blessing in return," which—if the grimm just reflect your emotional energy back at you—will probably make the grimm pause and look at you for a moment before continuing on, which confirms and reinforces your belief that this is the correct way to deal with grimm. This Is How Religion Works.

so all that to say, as long as i’m correct about at least one of these presuppositions—the one with the strongest textual evidence, no less—then propitiating the grimm will reduce their aggression dramatically if not stop it altogether. and if that’s the case then i’d imagine grimm-worship is quite common and also varied in more remote regions where human-grimm encounters are frequent.

the shape of that worship will evolve out of how people in a given community figured out that you can do this with grimm. if one person tries a certain thing and it works, and then more people try the same thing and it works for them to, then that is going to become known as the Thing That Works and it will be gradually refined and elaborated on from generation to generation. and on the other side of the mountains they might be doing the same process but with a completely different thing that also worked the first time.

so you might have a village making huge ritual productions of preparing a feast for the grimm with a portion of the harvest, orchestrated by a coterie of priests who fill the offerings with aura… and in the hinterlands a few hundred miles away you might have a group of nomadic herders who leave the bones of every sheep they eat for the grimm and also have elaborate coming-of-age rituals where you go into the wilderness to prove yourself to the grimm by baring your soul… and up north on the coast you might have a whaling town where sailors pray to something like the leviathan or the feilong as a sea-god because their ancestors happened to stumble into a symbiotic relationship with a giant grimm that preys on whales and realized these little guys in boats make better hunting partners than they do snacks. etc.

basically if you accept a presupposition that the grimm aren’t "soulless evil monsters whose sole purpose is to kill humans" and consider them as beings that have some rhyme or reason as to when they’re aggressive and when they’re not, and the rhyme or reason is something humans/faunus could plausibly figure out how to accommodate and/or influence, there are a lot of ways to build a grimm cult. ’cause religion is at its core humans trying to understand the world so we can keep ourselves safe, healthy, and comfortable; worshipping grimm is just a cultural framework for a threat management program.

think about it in those terms, and take however you think grimm work and ask "what could people Do to lower the risk of grimm attacking them?" and "what might people Do that doesn’t really have an effect but seems like it maybe does?" and then start to elaborate from there with "okay, what stories do people tell to explain why they do these things and how they learned to do these things? how do they conceive of the grimm and their relationship to grimm? how does this shape the social and moral values of this religion?" etc.

praxis comes first, belief second. and the praxis develops through trial and error with the basic goal of "how can we make the grimm leave us alone?" so things that clearly don’t work will be discarded. (with ‘clearly don’t work’ meaning "we did this and grimm immediately attacked us"; people will tend to take "we did this and grimm didn’t attack us for two months" to mean "it worked! we should do it every other month!")

#and that’s how you build a religion :)#worship is practical! it’s meant to be effective! humans are really bad at distinguishing correlation from causation so we #develop irrational belief systems based on coincidence and our bonkers pattern recognition #which is why all religions ever are So Weird. WE’RE weird.#but it’s practical nevertheless. people do it because it works or it seems to work and the belief systems are just us #telling stories about ourselves #to explain why we do stuff because ''it works'' isn’t satisfying. we ALL have the toddler urge to go BUT WHY??#and then we come up with a better story. scientists do this also they just invented a process that #puts up guardrails against the universal human reflex to go ''well i put a bucket outside hoping it would rain and it did rain. therefore #putting buckets outside makes it rain.'' lmfao

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lannisterdaddyissues · 2 months

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god why am i so fucking stupid. having adhd is truly a curse and i hate bearing it

#not to vent on main but. fml actually!#in my health assessment lab we had this case study assignment to do and i freaking. misunderstood all of it so bad #idk why but for some reason i thought we were supposed to make up a patient ourselves for it #…we were not #no :) we were not :) there’s a freaking. TEMPLATE for the exact patient we were supposed to do it on in the module #that i opened once and then forgot about because adhd just works like that #and now im literally . kmsing because we fucking . we fucking presented these orally in class #and i was only half paying attention bc i was (incorrectly) documenting my (made-up) patient information on the record #and i thought it was weird that like 2 or 3 people seemed to have VERY similar patients but did not question it further #…which is to say. i may be stupid.#and now i feel like dying because im gonna have to email my professor and TELL HER how stupid i am #and hope that she takes enough pity on me and my cursed brain to let me do it over properly #because my lab grade is now barely a 77 and i need a 75 to pass. and our final assessment is tomorrow.#i genuinely cannot live like this anymore im serious #i need a fucking brain transplant #anyway tl;dr guys please pray for me please please please im actually disintegrating rn #to delete later

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kouhaiofcolor · 8 months

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I really miss the natural hair community & watching natural hair content generally. That was so good for Black Women; we were thriving at it, too. And as rapidly as it rose to popularity, it’s crazy how dead the whole concept is now. I think it had more to do w all the division created over routines around maintenance than anything else. Everybody was entirely too pushy w trying to make what worked for them personally a staple for taking care of textured hair in general — & that shit walked so that colorism, featurism, texturism & misogynoir could run. Now the same ppl who was riding the wave a few years ago & swearing by all these products, brands, sponsors, wash day & styling methods have put natural hair away as a concept entirely.

Also, why the hell did we waste all that energy prefacing everything w, “Stop doing this and do these things for your hair to grow to tailbone length overnight🤡” — just to go right back to weave and perms? All that researching for what? All the dedication to disproving antiblack/misogynoir notions about Black hair for what? All the redefining of protective styles for what? All the trying to unlearn the belief structures around the colonization of Black hair for what? What did we teach ourselves fr? How did we make things any easier for Black Women and little Black girls? It’s tragic af. The Natural Hair Community/Movement is dead, it seems like. I don’t think we fought hard enough to prevent what happened to it honestly :\

#this isn’t to call out or demoralize weave or perms or anything like that either #I don’t think there’s anything wrong w black women doing any of that #but on the flip side I do kind of feel like #maybe weave is a bit of a crutch for us?#even w an understanding of it being a conditioning via white supremacy & antiblackness #I just don’t understand why it was smothered as a movement #& why black women seem to have like…. kind of just rolled over with it?#it was legitimately good for us before everyone else went to bandwagoning for relevance #and I get that too #but I still feel like we did a poor job at defending & teaching each other first & foremost #non black people definitely got in the way of that #but we also got in each other’s way ourselves #everyone I used to be subscribed to on yt for natural hair content stepped away from it #even those w natural hair grown & maintained beyond their waist or whatnot #the switch right back to unhealthy means of taking care of textured hair was flipped so easily #it just saddens me cus we were working at doing better #esteeming ourselves #our nieces #our daughters #our female cousins and mothers and aunties about the way we take care of our hair #and fell just short of actually taking something tangible from it #it wasn’t about having longer hair #it was about giving textured hair representation in ways it mattered #we were so driven in this & it was beautiful #there is no movement or dedication to this in 2024 tho #proud of black women who were independent thinkers & didn’t fall off w all the chaos #them trends had ppl clambering all over each other #& it ultimately killed the movement #nowadays you don’t even hear from the non black women who were vulturing for clout #i be floored w how sparse any content true to the hash tags are anymore

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marymekpop · 2 years

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you and I, the intersection & union of two universes

#crash course in romance #korean drama #jeon do yeon #jung kyung ho #mygif #dont ask me how i remembered all these scenes asdkjfd #my brain is just triggered that way #and i also had the hardest time coming up with a caption #but hEYYYY #we finally got ourselves one #i thought why not throw it back to the title of the very first ep and combine it with the title of the last ep #yup yup yup yup i really did that #i love these 2 so much #im thankful everyday that they crossed paths and their universes met #they are MY universe #i think i might have a few more ccir posts in me to share #they should be coming out soon.. maybe hopefully #it feels weird and surreal to think that this drama is done #im gonna miss it #it wasnt perfect but it was so good and wholesome and beautiful most of the times #im gonna miss our parents and our family members and our student frands and the banchan business #dont want to say goodbye just yet but im happy becus everyone got a happy ending #SEASON 2 PLS??#PLS???#as for me personally i got 2 dramas down and 2 more to go #im gonna miss this drama :((

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mulders-too-large-shirt · 8 hours

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just finished el mundo gira and i thought it was like. comically bad. sorry to any el mundo gira stans, but tomorrow's writeup will have some hater energy.

#sometimes we need to let ourselves be haters. it is a truth rarely acknowledged. but you know it to be true.#just sitting here wondering wtf i watched #their weird fucking heads 😭😭😭#usually when i see a bad episode i try to find an angle to enjoy it from but today we've got nothing #but the sheer absurdity of which was daring bold and camp in concept and a bummer in execution #there are three main kinds of bad txf episode #the first is “oh my god why did no one tell them this was a terribly offensive thing to put on TV” (genderbender or excelsis dei)#or “oh my god this is horrifically out of character” (3 or certain episodes from late s2 where they are always arguing)#and the 3rd kind are the just boring episodes #here we got offensive while trying to deliver some sort of message (i think?) AND boring!#a unique and unprecedented combo!#lmao man. lmfao even #it was just. not good.#usually with the horribly offensive ones i am at least invested in the plot in a sort of “can't look away from a train wreck” sense #but here i was just like. okay. what do you want me to say.#LMAO it was just not very good!! i am a lover enough to hate the things i love sometimes.#it is not my least fave of all time tho... perhaps i shall make a ranking on those. the ones i will never ever watch again.#but i would say it places into my worst 10... maybe? i think so. yeah. at least my worst 15.

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mylastmoleculeofserotonin · 28 days

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I think I’ve finally put my finger on the reason why I (and people in general) love to watch “kids’ shows” when they are older teens and adults: because empathy and love, especially platonic love, are arguably humans’ most valuable trait and yet, in our society and in “realistic” media is treated as a weakness or at least at odds with being successful. Like, empathy isn’t even unique to humans, it’s found in and is integral to so many species of animals (and maybe even plants too!!), especially what we consider to be some of the most fearsome predators like lions and wolves. But humans have have “gone all in on” empathy and the capacity to form bonds with other humans, even outside familial circles, which is the reason we outlived the homo erectus which lived at the same time as humans since we were able to form larger communities. And all that’s to say that seeing shows where moral goodness is synonymous with empathy and friendship and wins the day is probably very satisfying for our brains since we don’t often see empathy treated as the essential part of us that it is.

That’s why shows like Hilda or Kipo and the Age of the Wonderbeasts are my personal favorites because the main characters’ defining trait is being empathetic and is, at least in the beginning, their only way of avoiding trouble. And these shows in particular feature the main characters advancing the plot and achieving heroic feats through simply talking it out and generally being a kind and helpful person. When I first watched these shows I, admittedly, saw such events as cheesy, but when I took time to think about it, it not only makes sense why it worked, but was quite literally the best possible way to fix the problem at hand because empathy is a very natural thing for humans and is literally how we have become the apex species so of course it can work when someone gives it a chance.

It’s human nature to be kind and empathetic and is why it’s so satisfying to see it spotlit in kids shows.

#i have no idea how to tag this #empathy #human nature #humanity #children’s show #kipo and the age of wonderbeasts #kataow #dreamworks kipo #hilda the show #hilda the series #hilda netflix #give us more shows where empathy conquers all!!#especially media with adults as the target audience #it’s so weird how we have used our gift of intelligence to tell ourselves that empathy is a weakness #like why is reality basically synonymous for pessimism and dark gritty nightmares #it’s capitalism #always capitalism #capitalism is why we can’t have nice things #its also why friendship is so underrated #because if we actually prioritized friendships as we should the economy would collapse #which would be a GOOD thing #because the economy is a made up thing that rewards greed and selfishness and inscentivizes low quality of life #and it discourages innovation because more money would be generated from many inefficient products than one better one #it literally goes against humans’ two biggest evolutionary advantages: empathy and intelligence #i did not mean to go on this tangent about economy in the tags but here we are #empathy and compassion are logical and what we are built to do #we need to stop treating them as opposing forces #Watch Kipo to see what I mean #thank you for coming to my ted talk

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thereareeyesinsidethetrees · 5 days

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most idiotic thing we've done lately is start a pride pixels blog when 95% of flags we come across cause us literal physical pain to look at

#how stupid are we? that we did this to ourselves? fucking hell #ae mean if so many folks are making them (the pain-causing flags) then??#that means that there's plenty of other beings that could have done this without hurting themselves doesn't it??#bangs head into wall why did we do this #we like the pixels and we like the flags that don't cause pain but we're getting sick of our eyes hurting all the time for this

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good-beanswrites · 8 months

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By the way, about LCSyS, how are you dealing with the whole 'Es plurality' situation? Because it is a central part of their character that gets brought up on multiple voice dramas and seems really difficult to remove. Also, it is implied that some of our judgements may be our if character for Es because they seem pretty uncertain about it. For example, some people including myself suspect that if Es wasn't controlled by the audience they would have voted Mahiru innocent because they appear somewhat fond of her and would probably have not jumped to stalker based on no evidence (kinda bullshit people thought that anyway but whatever). This was asked by someone who is insane about Es and thinks about them constantly, BTW.

Ah, well I appreciate an Es expert (Espert?) weighing in on it!! :D

Because that element is very central to both them and the plot, even if it hasn’t been fully explored yet. Like you said, there are a lot of events that rely on these “other” voices, some actions and decisions that they themself seem unsure of! Not to mention their own dialogue using a plural first person pronoun! I’m already trying to distance the au from the audience interaction element, so I’ve definitely kept my eye on the plural Es theory >:3

Since we have little to work with, I’ve tried to keep them pretty vague in the fic so far. They don’t appear in a lot of it because of plot reasons (everything is the same as canon to them, most of the time). And even in their pov chapter I try to steer thoughts and emotions directly to the prison. I only mention their identity near the end to make everyone say “Hmmmm we don't know who you are and neither do you!” Now, I'm prepared for three main options for endings: 1. There is a non-system, in-universe explanation for the voices. 2. The voices are directly confirmed as the audience. 3. Yamanka states that he hates me, personally, and doesn’t explain anything about Es. If it’s the first one, I’ll see how well it works into my fic and go from there! (If it’s overly supernatural/involves Es disappearing/dying, I might make some tweaks lmao. I’m committed to accuracy but this is a fix-it, at the end of the day.) For the second two, I plan on leaning into plural Es, with research and input from others to make the writing accurate 👍I’m hoping to go back revise earlier sections to drop more hints and make things consistent. I also want to write an epilogue once we get more context on the ending as a whole! Though, I guess they've already confirmed some feeling of plurality... maybe I add some lines in that last chapter now...

#milgram #lights camera sing your sins #thank you so much!! i dont know why i was afraid to include things that have been confirmed even if we dont know the big picture #maybe i do that this week :0 it wont be a lot - just a little line here and there in the final chapter #plus in upcoming sections have the prisoners ask jackalope about the odd things they said during the interrogations #(to which he'll wiggle out of answering lol)#unfortunately i think its equally likely that the project will end with a lot of mystery and we'll never get the full truth on es/the crime #since its about reflection and ourselves and not a murder mystery #they could definitely pull a 'but how did it make you feel? what did it make you think? thats all that matters.'#i wont be Happy about it but it makes sense #and in that case ill need all the Esperts out there helping me out 🤝#es

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