#will that even show up in the tags anymore. im a fool

[lokh]

WAIT SHUROS DAD SAID HE WANTED HIM TO BRING SOMETHING BACK INTERESTING.... AND WHO IS MORE INTERESTING THAN LAIOS....

[ravengards-rogue]

WHAT SET YOU FREE, BROUGHT YOU TO ME BABY.

rdr2 men + short blurbs about their favorite sex positions.

ft. arthur morgan, john marston, javier escuella, and charles smith.

✧ tags : SPOILER HEAVY, fem + afab!reader, unprotected sex, light angst (in the horny post is crazy im sorry fdkjjkds), very gendered language, javier says one thing in spanish (thank u @nanamimizz), a little sprinkle of plot with each (and some canon divergency), john co-parents w abigail, otherwise just horny. 18+

✧ wc : about 1.4-8k each (6.3k total)

✧ a/n : sorry for making a multi character post for the cowboy game its cooking me to death. my john bias is showing rip. title is from rebel yell by billy idol but i listen to the bvb cover

sorry about charles and javiers but if i edit this anymore im going to level an entire city using hollow purple technique. please rb if you enjoyed i worked kind of hard on whatever this is.

sorry for . the THIRD repost of this i promise i wont after this. its just really bugging me. PLEASE

.𖥔 ݁ ˖˚☽˚｡⋆ ARTHUR MORGAN + PRONE BONE ; 

It’s an odd feelin’ for Arthur. 

Wanting something, he means. Wanting anything as much as he wants you. He’s lived a less than quiet life up until now. And he ain’t the brightest, certainly, but living this kind of life teaches you many lessons. One of them being, it’s better not to covet anything. Coveting something you’re not entitled to, well—it’ll lead you places you wouldn’t want to go with a gun. 

Arthur has made the mistake of coveting love before, dreamed of a future so completely out of his reach he almost convinced himself it was possible. Dreamed of it so foolishly he’d even go visit a woman he very well ought to forget. It’s his problem, his burden to bear - always desiring outcomes unsuited to him. 

He’s just that sort of man he reckons. But he learned his lesson. He tries (tried?) to stay away from it after that. Tried not to pine too much for normalcy when such hopes had failed him twice. The loss of his child completely on his account and the loss of his love at the same fate. 

So, wanting you - well, he feels like the world's dullest fool. Really. How is it that Arthur had fallen in love with someone again? It had all just happened so quickly. You were another woman he’d saved from the O’Driscolls, though it wasn’t like you were no damsel. A lot of those men were dead by the time they arrived. That sort of perseverance would stick with you while you traveled together. Much like Sadie, you didn’t take well to housework - you liked to earn your keep. Though you’re not nearly so trigger happy. 

You’re quiet, thoughtful, well-read. Plus you’re good at making money. That’s why Dutch don't complain about you joining them, he figures. 

(Arthur tries not to pry into it too much at first, but he eventually learns that you’re gambling. Which is how you’re able to make such a fast turn around. A prim little lady like you makes for a fine poker player, and you love to play men out of their money. He thinks it’s one of the funniest and most interesting things about you. He can’t help but love you a little more for it. )

When the feelings in him start to stir, Arthur tries to overlook it. Arthur convinces himself, time and time again - that there’s no way he’ll grow more tender about you. Eventually, it’ll die down. You’re a decent woman is all, a kind one - who’s easy for him to love and even easier for him to confide in. In your time together, you often come to Arthur and you always seem to have some profound wisdom he is so sorely lacking. Someone easy to love, who does not expect much from Arthur at all. It’s only natural a lonely, covetous man like him would start to dream about you. He tells himself, it will pass eventually. Should he simply let it run by him, it will pass. But Arthurs a fool, you’ll remember. 

 Of course, by the time he understood all that - he already loved you enough that he couldn’t bear it. It was already too late and it wasn’t going to change any time soon. Especially not while everything changed around him. 

So, Arthur is undoubtedly a fool, but he’s lucky. He felt divinely blessed when you’d returned his feelings for him so politely. A coy little smile on your face, a laugh like you thought he was silly for being doubtful. Arthur tried to explain himself but you wouldn’t hear a word of it. Maybe that’s another thing he loves so much about you. There’s nothing he ever needs to explain. 

In any case, all Arthur seems to do lately is want you. Wants you when it’s inconvenient. Wants you before he wants liquor or a cigarette or some other vice. Any time anything goes wrong, you’re the first thing his mind can conjure up for relief. That pretty smile and that self-assured way of living. It’s hard to get time alone in camp. And Arthur is a man in love, so any touch could be enough to set him on fire. Last week you hugged his waist a little before giving him a kiss goodbye and he had to listen to you laugh yourself into a fit as he waited for…little Arthur to settle down. 

He don’t get many chances to be with you. Lay with you in that way that grown folk in love do. Though, if the two of you book it somewhere for a few days - the camp knows better not to ask where you’ve been. But it’s not often you get to really be together, where it’s peaceful to do that. Someone’s always hounding one of you to do something. 

Arthur is a lucky man though, like he said. Today he had time. Today he’s alone with you in a beat up little saloon and today he gets to do as he likes. He gets to be greedy. And it’s an odd feeling for him, really, to want something so bad he disregards everything else in the world for a little while. 

Feeling you, though - absolves the guilt for wanting. He’d be stupid to want you any less desperately. 

Arthur’s favorite way to have you is on your stomach. Laid flat, just barely pushed up against him as he fucks you deep. You’ll fuck like rabbits for a little while and Arthur will wear you out just like this, maneuvering you until you’re pinned all underneath his weight. You lose any fight you might have, too exhausted to worry yourself with pleasing him - and when you’re like that, you let Arthur take care of you. 

(He really ain’t talented at much, but he’s good with his hands. Being dexterous is part of being a talented shot. When Arthur has the time to spread you sweet in his lap and make you cum all over his fingers, he does so for as long as he can. At least until you beg him so sweetly otherwise. The same hands, soiled with gunsmoke, look so good so deep in you. At least in his eyes.)

Wet and pliable and helpless. Arthur loves you like that. He knows, he knows you’re anything but - but he’d be damned to pretend this don’t feel best. Tight, wet cunt so welcoming from all the pleasure he’s ripped out of you. Your bodies pressed together, your heartbeat pulsing through your skin. All sticky, honeyed need and animal desire as Arthur lets all of him sink on top of you. His heavy, lumbering form crushing you in - trapping you somewhere you can’t run from him. The curve of your spine pushed against his chest, ticklish. 

Every inch of his body that so wholly wants for you, Arthur aches to make you feel. Burn it in you lest anything happens that risks your forgetting. 

He can feel his hips meet your ass, backside squished against him - desperate for deeper friction. Whining. You’re whining to him so pretty, a pillow pushed underneath you to give friction to needy clit. 

Arthur can feel how much you want more. Maybe Arthur is greedy, but he likes that look much better on you. Your pussy is sucking him in so tight, silken walls pulsing with every shallow little measured thrust. Arthur lets his arm wrap around your neck, your face pressing into his bicep. You moan again and he laughs. 

“Arthur,” Your words come out in a messy slur. He lets his scruffy face press against your neck, a kiss behind your ear. He wants to kiss you all over. There’s not enough hours in the day. “Oh, god, Arthur,” 

“Still feels good, then, I’m guessin’,” 

“Shut up,” You huff and press your cheek into his arm. He doesn’t bother stifling his laugh. “Still feels…big. Stretchin’ me out—hicc—so much,” 

You really don’t try to rile him up - but you do a damn good job of it anyway. He groans, grunts as he pulls back and pistons himself in you. A gesture half-way between a kiss and the warning shot of a gun. The sound of skin hitting skin echoes, noisy and vulgar. Arthur don’t pay it much mind. He laughs against your shoulder.

“One of these days, that moutha’ yours is gonna get me in real trouble.” 

You giggle back at him 

“What kinda trouble is that now?” 

Even from your side glance, you’ve got that lovely little smile on you. Fuckdrunk and ingratiating, like you know he’s wrapped so tight around your fingers. And he is, like nothing else in the world could have him. A wave of possession curls up over Arthur, makes him press more of himself into you. Onto you. Another deep push of his cock, sliding against the tenderest parts of you. Staking some silent desire in you. He wants and wants and wants, and hopes that whatevers above him can forgive him for making the same mistake thrice. 

“Dunno,” Arthur comments, teeth grazing your shoulder and kissing the indentations “Got our whole lives together to find out, I reckon.” 

“I’ll hold you to it, Mister.” 

Arthur laughs. “Hope you do, Miss.” 

.𖥔 ݁ ˖˚☽˚｡⋆ JOHN MARSTON + COWGIRL ;

John doesn’t say that he loves you lightly. 

Hardly a thing he says can be said that way. Could never afford too. In an alternate universe where nothing goes wrong in his life, maybe - but he has a hard time picturing what the hell that’d look like. A version of himself so untainted, without all of the violence and blood and gunsmoke? Foreign. John can’t picture it worth a damn. 

Who John is without a deadbeat father and a dead Ma is somewhere far beyond his reach. Ain’t nothing about his life, at any point, lighthearted. 

On top of all that mess, he’s got a boy at age four with a woman he ain’t married too. And that relationship is always on rocky waters, even though John’s decided to do right by his own flesh and blood sometime ago. Most things in the world he should feel good about he doesn’t, and most things he should understand render him clueless. He’s a mess on multiple accounts, and he still doesn’t know how exactly he’s meant to approach this life of his. He knows what he should do, but nothing about how to do it. 

John doesn’t come to love you easily ‘cause he wouldn’t know easy love if it hit him in his face. Quickly and painfully, but not easily. 

Your return to the gang was an odd one. You were an old presence and your disappearance was an even older story. John thought he’d never gonna see you again for sure. You’d been a part of the gang back long before all of the nonsense that took place in Blackwater and you left about the time Arthur’s boy died. John don’t remember why you left exactly. He thinks it was a fight with Hosea, of all things.

 Dutch weren't too happy about it neither, but Dutch back then didn’t make a show. 

So you left, and John buried every feeling he ever harbored. You found all them again up in Colter, where you’d been living out your days lately. According to you, in the middle of riding, you thought you’d heard Arthur. So, somewhat recklessly, you went chasing him. Didn’t matter if he was just something your mind conjured. According to you, if it was him, it was at least worth checking to make sure. You’d reunited with Arthur and after some tears, he rode with you back to camp. 

Upon your return, the gang welcomed you with open arms. 

You’d done a lot in your time alone.You spent most of that time just like that, a ghost wanderin’ the planes. You weren’t gonna stay with ‘em, but Arthur insisted and Hosea did too. That wasn’t enough to compel, so John was last to chip in. You should stay, at least until Valentine. 

(Silently he thought, you should stay so John can trace memories of you. It was so long ago, he should’ve forgotten all of it. You were a year older than John and always on his ass but easy for him to talk to. Didn’t fuss over his failures. You just barely grew into your womanhood when you set your sights on running away. You wanted more than this life, and John never really forgave you for it. His first heartbreak, maybe - but it’s all too blurry for that. 

You understood him though better than anyone, and one day you were gone. Nothing’s really the same.) 

You changed tremendously and not at all. He missed you. God, did he ever. Missed you a long time. Didn’t realize how much until you came back and everything in him felt right again. Your return stirred up old feelings and everyone noticed. He wasn’t trying to keep it a secret, but he really wasn’t trying to fall back into anything with you. Not how he did. 

Just like you did back then, you read John like an open book. And just like he did back then, he loved you all too helplessly for it.  It was just all too easy again, to be with you. 

You stayed out of the way at first, for the sake of his family. 

But, John ain’t a half-decent man even when he’s trying to be. So he set himself on being with you. It wasn’t easy - most things with him aren’t as you’ll see.  Having you around again straightened what was left of his common sense, at least. He told Abigail before telling you. He figured you wouldn’t even reply unless that was all out of the way. That turned out as well as you’d expect.

 It was settled between the two of you thereafter. He’s lucky she didn’t toss him into the street. 

Everything works out in a way. As best they can between broken people. You make peace with each other. His boy loves you like a third parent (you’re better with him than John is). Abigail commends you for straightening out such a worthless man though she’s a little melancholy.  John just tries to stay out of the way. You’ll be together in the end. There’s a plan with the five of you. 

But until it all falls apart, he doesn’t get all that much time with you. 

There’s moments like tonight, though. Rare ones. Together out robbin’, cooped out some place in the woods where no one is around. A place so shaded by nightfall that John can absolve himself of every sin he’s ever committed in his life and pray at the altar between your hips. John is convinced he might find worship like he’s always hearing about there whenever he touches you, the marred skin of his hands and knuckles reading the scripture of your body with careful precision. 

You might turn him into a literate man yet. 

John glances up at you. Only the light of the fire and the moonlight there to accompany as he watches you over him. You’re beautiful. John couldn’t picture a single thing more perfect in his life. 

Your hands against his bare chest, nails digging into the flesh as you lean forward. Your palm dug into the dirt, John finds his own hands rested at your hips. John looks at you awe-struck, cock twitching at the mere sight. His heart settles in his throat, but he’s calm all at the same time. With you, he forgets. All of it. The worst of himself. 

Bare naked and so close, he watches your face as you strain. You feel soft. Every inch of you in comparison to him is. A bead of sweat slides down the valley of your breasts. John cranes his neck up to catch it with his tongue, licking a stripe up to your neck - letting his teeth sink into the space between your jaw and neck. You want to make it last and John doesn’t blame you. It’s so rare you get to have each other so unrestrained. John can feel all the ways you want him, can see it in your face - all pinched with need. You’re holding yourself back, trying to get it to last as long as the night will allow. It’s cute in a way.

It’s different than how he’s used to seein’ you, all cocky or otherwise. You’re needy like this. Just needy. His stomach turns with lust, jolting through him like a strike of lightning. His cock twitches against your folds, sliding against them. Pure admiration watching the sticky mess of his pre-cum and your own arousal mix together and smear on your mound. You make a soft noise in the back of your throat, faint and tender as you fall forward just a little. John laughs against your neck. 

“Darlin’,” He says with a huff. Not malice. Something akin to bliss, where he can rarely afford it “Have I done something to piss you off today?” 

You pick yourself up and look down at him and frown. John kisses the corner of your mouth, resisting some crude desire to fuck up into you. 

“Just,” You grunt as the tip of his cock passes over your throbbing clit, your whole body wracking to a shiver. John looks awed. “Pent up. Goddamn it,” 

John figures it out quickly after that. It’s this part of it he likes. The proximity. The closeness. Feeling the tremble in your hands as they struggle to keep up right, muscles strained in your forearms. Being able to hold you, to keep the pace or let you take the lead. The clear view of your face as pleasure travels up through your spine and melts into you. He grabs your hips, the fat dimpling underneath his fingers as he moves you along. He can’t wait. You don’t bother to protest seeing John can’t seem to bear it anymore. You collapse into his chest, your tits pushed flat against his pecs.

His cock throbs near painfully, sliding against your soft cunt before finding himself lined with you. He thinks to himself that it’s this he was looking for, as he tucks your face against his neck and lets his tip stretch you out slowly. Such a vice like grip, stretching - resisting him like your whole body can’t anticipate the sensation of fullness. You gasp against his throat. 

“John,”  

What a sweet sound from your mouth, even sweeter as he bucks himself up. Keeps you steady and lets his cock stretch you full, feel you deep. “That’s right, my angel. Didn’t think you’d remember my name when you’re all worked up like this.” 

“You’re,” You gasp and John thrusts, thrusts hard until he’s buried to the hilt. You shudder, walls pulsing around him as he bottoms out and John laughs like the terrible man he is. He fucks you again, over and over - a wicked little smile watching “Awful. Just awful, John Marston,” 

“Ain’t that the truth,” He hums against your mouth as his hand snakes between your bodies, thumb rubbing against your clit. “Wonder what kinda woman that makes you,” 

“A foolish one,” 

John laughs. 

“I sure do love you for it,”

.𖥔 ݁ ˖˚☽˚｡⋆JAVIER ESCUELLA + SIDEWAYS ;

Javier hasn’t thought about much other than surviving. 

It’s been like that. Been like that for a while, probably much longer than he cares to admit. He’s sure any sane man would suffer the same plight if they lead the same life. Anything but survival is little more than a pipe-dream, so Javier tries not to go for anything too strongly. In that aspect he’s like many of the members of the gang he’s in, perhaps that’s why he sticks to them. There’s that phrase Hosea’s always saying - that misery loves company. Javier will take any decent company he can get.  He’s desperate for it just like he’s desperate for most things - inwardly, silently. 

Some of that desperation may be symptomatic of who he is. After he killed a man in a crime of passion for a woman he loved and ran from a government who would sooner exile him than change, Javier decided to not dream anymore. Every revolutionary who dreams too hopefully pays the price in blood.

(Javier thinks there’s probably nothing in the world as true as this. A form of gospel. He remembers the first dream he ever had after his uncle passed. Not a nightmare but a dream. He remembers the exact feeling of waking up, cold and confused. What is a dream, except a memento of survivor's guilt that loyal people cling onto fruitlessly. When hope starts to feel like a debt he’s going to waste his life paying back, Javier loses sight of everything. The beginning of the end in some way.) 

His mind doesn’t occupy itself with anything bigger than that. Since Dutch found him starving, there was never a desire to try and live off aspirations. He pays his penance with loyalty and honor. Practices some form of humility and tries, not too desperately, to carve a place for him to fit. All without drawing too much attention or caring too much. If you ignore the bleeding in his fingers, his penchant for knives over guns, and his refusal to talk too long about the place he comes from - it’s nearly believable that none of it matters. 

Except loyalty. All Javier honors is that. It’s the only thing he has some part in choosing, so he choses it every time. Living like that didn’t make any difference to him. He was surrounded by mostly decent people. He didn’t hate the life he was living. 

It wasn’t important. It didn’t matter. His directionless-ness, his floating. Hadn’t since he joined the gang. At least not to anyone but him. He didn’t know what he’s meant to do or if he was meant to proceed with this forever. He was (is)  loyal to Dutch. To the gang. 

He hadn’t thought much about what comes after. 

And it didn’t matter until he met you

He’d sworn off love after seeing where it got him, at least until he could love more dispassionately. When the women bring you back from their outing from Valentine and beg Dutch to let you stay, Javier doesn’t think much of it all. He thinks you’re pretty, if it counts for anything. But he doesn’t let himself linger on you too long. 

But that’s the sequence with you two, really. The whole time.  He doesn’t linger until he does. It doesn't matter until it does. He doesn’t think about you until it’s all he can think about. 

You go for him first. And it’s in little, unimportant ways that might not mean shit to you but mean a whole lot to him. You have some kind of tenderness about you that you wear deep, runs through your blood like love ran through his once long ago. Some softness he can’t really measure with his own. It’s not that that gets him. It’s that sometimes you look at Javier like he's … someone you want to see. He forgot what that was like all together. It felt foreign to him the first time it happened. Seeing how you light up when Javier is around. 

You wanted to see him. You noticed that he’s gone. If he sang by the campfire - you’d sit by him and listen.  If he was out in the trees keeping guard, he’d hear the soft call of your voice to Grimshaw ask Where’s Javier? And sometimes the girls will make fun of you - but you wouldn’t deny anything they said. It’s so small and ordinary. He would’ve never considered himself simple before meeting you. Nothing is simple. Nothing. 

(But then, Javier thinks of the kinds of songs he sings and the way he takes care of himself and the clothes he wears and maybe Javier has some kind of affinity for preciousness that explains all of it.) 

When Javier confesses his feelings for you - he finds the affair to be like most things between you. Ordinary love, not really between outlaws but people. It’s up against a tree while you share a drink and he’s looking at the curve of your mouth and the plum color Karen’s so kindly put on you. And his head fills with kissing you so he does. A breathless confession between alcohol stains and the feeling of your hands curled in the lapels of his suit. 

From there, Javier is your lover. He’s not interested in the business of secrets, but he tries not to let it show too much. Not that he doesn’t want to. He wants to show you off more than anything - at least some part of him does. But the other part wants to keep you away from prying eyes, keep his love for you only where the both of you can see. If he could keep that pretty lovestruck face you make all to himself forever he would. 

When he gets a chance to whisk you away from everything, Javier jumps at the chance. Not often, but Javier makes time for you. Makes time to indulge in love he thought he’d  never find again. 

That’s why he’s here with you in the middle of nowhere, a ghost town where no one knows you.. A reserved room with a bed and lowlights all to yourselves. 

Javier can’t keep his hands to himself and he doubts you expect him too. 

For Javier, this sense of proximity is what intoxicates him most. The warmth of your bare skin in the slivers of yourself exposed. Javier is fond of finding you like this after a long day of horse riding. Of sneaking touches to your waist as you push back against him to sleep, only to find his desire for you - laid clearly. He likes hearing you whimper feeling his length poke against your back, the embarrassment when it dawns on you that he wants you after all. Always surprised, even though Javier tells you it so often. Whispers it along your neck and shoulders whenever you’re at camp together.

You like the feeling of his hands so Javier always starts with them. He squeezes your hips. Planes his palms over your chest before squeezing your chest, pushing the fat between his fingers. You like the way  they look when they grope you, his chin resting against your shoulder as you spoon. In the lowlights of a cheap hotel - Javier gets the perfect view of your silhouette. Your body is sensitive over the fabric of your gown, heat prickling through you. 

Javier who is always so gentle with you, rouses so deep listening to your whining as he explores your body. The suffocating closeness of a single bed intoxicates him. 

“Javier,” Your voice is sweet and thin. Plays in Javier’s head like music and makes his mouth curl up into a catlike grin as you push back on him.  You look slightly over your shoulder, lips pushed into a pout. “Please,” 

He tugs at the fabric of your nightgown. The top half pulls haphazard underneath your tits, nipples perky and sensitive to touch while the skirt pools at your waist. What gets Javier like this is the desperation. Wanting so much but not being able to look too long. A way for you to mirror him, it’s a matter of possession. In some stupid way. Bunching your clothes up, pushing the fabric of your panties to one side, letting his arm wrap around your waist to touch and tease.  All of these are imprints of his longing, tucked faithful into your side as he whispers sweet nothings into your skin.

His cock twitches as it pushes past your folds with finality, your hands curling up at your sides.  You whimper softly, let your cheek rest against the sheets as Javier takes you on your side. Terribly close, you fuss as you feel him slide every inch into you slow, your hands reaching back for purchase. It’s the fit of you against him so perfect, the silent strokes of intimacy, the hush-hush giggles between the sheets that Javier loves most about fucking you like this. Too enamored with you to look too closely, he lets his eyes flutter closed. He could get drunk just being in your space. 

He carves out space for himself inside of you, feels your cunt accommodate for him like it loves him. A feverishness breaks out as his forehead rests on the space between your shoulders, an uncharacteristic whiny quality in his words. 

“Ser mío,” Javier says - as a reflection of what he really wants, to belong only to you. “Belong to me.” 

Darling as you always are, you nod softly. 

“All yours, Javier,” You whimper, finding his hand. “Forever,”

.𖥔 ݁ ˖˚☽˚｡⋆ CHARLES SMITH + MATING PRESS ; 

Wandering. 

He’s been doing it his whole life. Not something he’s proud of. Or ashamed of either, really. Just how things have gone for him until now. Charles doesn’t think his life has been any better or any worse than anyone else's. At least not when he weighs it with the same kind of pragmatism he does most things. It’s been a hard life, and a miserable one in so many ways. Still, it’s not something Charles is too keen to dwell on. 

There’s just something thematic about loss in Charles' life in a way he finds completely unpleasant. It’s more constant than anything. Loss of his home, loss of his mother, loss of his father in an attempt to find what’s best for him. It’s some overarching message that hangs over his head like a shadow. Everywhere he goes, trying to rectify his own solitude seems to come back to him. It doesn’t help that it’s an unfair world to start with, and would’ve been if he had just been black or just been native. But Charles is both, and has lived a life that reflects that specific injustice thoroughly. 

There’s not really anything Charles can do about it, at its baseline. When he left his father, the name of the game had simply been survival. He was well-equipped enough for that at least. But after survival comes trying to live and trying to live isn’t something so simple. Jumping in and out of gangs who thought they could get away with slighting him or generally being surrounded by unpleasant people. Trying to find something in pages of book and scripture, or in the way water ripples when it rains. 

He’s never felt any one way towards the gang. Even when he joined them all the way back in the Grizzlies. Lost in the cold, they’d crossed paths as Charles was out hunting. A lot of it feels like a blur. Of all the folks he’s met in his travels though, Dutch treats him fair and the rest of them (or most of them) are decent, honest folk. Charles stays in the Van Der Linde gang for such simple reasons as trying to stay alive and be somewhere that isn’t actively hostile towards him. He’s a good gunman, and a better fighter. The inner workings of gang politics and forging connection isn’t at the forefront of his mind, with the exception of the kindest few. 

The Van Der Linde gang is just a place where he can figure out what his purpose is meant to be, even if he doesn’t find it there. He’s never expecting anything to come out from his loyalties to it. 

Of all the things Charles expects of his life in the Van Der Linde gang, love is at the very bottom of the list. 

Maybe it’s about time he stops being surprised by these things happening to him one or way another.

 You were a member of the gang far before him, and someone Charles took to quickly. You’d joined the gang not too long after John from what Arthur tells him. Though the brunette speaks about you more fondly than he does his brother. A problem child at the start, according to Arthur - always getting into all sorts of trouble. Something you seemingly feel embarrassed about now and refuse to bring up. Charles has a hard time picturing it having only known you as you are. 

The woman you’ve grown into is someone else completely, and Charles sees that in you all the time. Compassionate like Hosea but charismatic like Dutch, and clever. And you’re beautiful, too, though Charles feels a little shallow admitting that’s part of what drew you into him. 

It wasn’t Charles that approached you first. You were the one who spoke to him, as often as you thought necessary but never in a way he found invasive. He doesn’t know what it is exactly about you that charms him near instantly. You’re enigmatic to a fault. It’s like you always know exactly what to say and exactly when to say it. Even more than that, you’re a terribly pleasant person to be around. Subtly warm and free of assumptions. When Charles talks to you about anything, you listen without making him feel like it’s any sort of burden to you. You don’t pry, don’t make missteps. Treat him fair, and then some. 

It’s unbearably simple, just how quickly and how easily he comes to adore you.  And, in some ways, Charles knows better than to believe that his purpose is loving someone. There’s more to it than that, surely - after everything. 

But then, he’ll watch you do something. Watch you do some kind of menial work that he could do for you instead. Thinks of skinning animals for new clothes and chopping wood and rubbing the soap off of you and all of a sudden it makes him feel anchored. Everything he could do for you. You anchor Charles easily, with a wispy smile. Make him want to find purpose in life with you. He never wants to be somewhere you’re not. 

He confesses it to you just like that, and like you do with most things - you accept and reciprocate without making too much of a fuss. 

For Charles, making love is an extension of wanting to ground himself in you. A distant siren song - the intersection of lust and bone deep adoration. Like most things, you’re the one to approach first every time. A soft hand on his forearm, a whisper that you want him. It’s with ease that he draws you away. Drags from you camp during nightfall with his horse and blankets and picks a spot with the perfect view of the stars. 

Charles watches you under the glow of moonlight, his vision adjusting to you easily. Naked underneath him, laid on your back with your legs folded at your knees - heaving deep breaths. He can see the sweat beading down your skin, your chest rising and falling - and the perfect view of your pussy. His hands and mouth are wet as you breathe out. He finds himself smiling at you, his own erection pressed against your thigh, pre-cum leaking out in a mesmerized haze. 

You lift your hands up and he leans down, surprised as you wrap them around his neck and pull him closer to you. Your mouths meet like that, and Charles laughs against your lips as you kiss him so eagerly. You blink at him, pretty. You’re always prettier than he remembers you being the last time he looks. 

“Charles,” You frown at him. “It’s impolite to keep a lady waiting,” 

He kisses the corner of your mouth. “Sorry, my love. I don’t want to hurt you,” 

“Well, I’m fine with it,” You repeat, almost petulant. Charles frowns. “‘Sides, it ain’t my first time taking you, you know?” 

“Well, I’m not fine with it.” 

You pout, looking at him all endeared. Charles couldn’t help but love you even if he tried. “You ain’t gonna hurt me. C’mon. Please?” 

“Please, what?” 

You look at him aghast before breaking out into a faux-scandalized giggle. “Now you—please fuck me. Pretty, please.” 

Charles feels something tickling against his spine hearing you say it. He couldn’t imagine getting sick of you in his whole life.  “Yeah, that’s good to hear.” 

You make an indignant noise but it’s silenced quickly as Charles positions himself against your entrance. He has plenty of discipline when it comes to matters like these, but right now - he feels like he’s going to lose his mind. Not nearly enough patience to wait. He lets his hands go up underneath your knees just to have something to hold onto. 

You make a little gasp as the tip of his cock pushes into you. Your walls are so soft, likely after all the orgasms he’d given you prior. You stop him in a shocked gasp, and Charles immediately readies himself to pull out. As if sensing his hesitance, you shake your head. 

“Charles,” You gasp, the words caught in your throat and hoarse “Deep. Want it deep,” 

His abdomen tightens, cocking twitching hard at your words. He agrees silently to your desires. 

When it comes to sex, there’s very little Charles dislikes.

But this is his favorite. He’s simple but no other position lets him see you so close. He likes the way your eyes widen as he pushes up underneath your knees and folds you underneath his weight. How you look pinned down under him, the perfect view of your eyes rolling back into your head and the proximity from your face to his. He lets his cock stretch you out slowly, throbbing each time your nails dig desperately into arms trying to keep your composure. Fuck you feel so tight like that. Soft pussy, dripping and sticky. You suck him in relentlessly, and Charles groans as he bottoms out. You take every inch of him so well. So perfect like the rest of you. 

Your eyes flutter open as he stays there, buried in you in complete bliss. You’re dazed. 

“Kiss?” 

Surprise followed by adoration, he abides by your request easily. Overwhelmed with it as he presses a chaste peck to your mouth, he laughs. “As many as you want.”

Anything you want, Charles thinks, he would give to you. 

.𖥔 ݁ ˖˚☽˚｡⋆

[ktchie]

Jason/Ted has done something to majorly piss you off so a night of femdom/teasing/edging is needed to teach him a lesson 😈

'Just you'

Sub!Ted x Reader

Smut, Angst and Fluff

♡other tags: blow jobs, submissive!Ted Lasso, tooth rotting fluff, heart wrenching Angst, porn with a light plot.

♤2.5k wordw

◇Ted made you jealous, a little punishment wouldn't hurt would it?

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

"Youre not crying are you, darling?" You asked mockingly, cruelly, and chuckling when Ted shook his head quickly - eyes closed and jaw clenched.

You gripped his cock in your palm, wet and loud with each movement. He shudders and writh under your hold, gasping with heaving chest and sweaty throat.

"P-please!" He cried, looking at you before falling back down again on the bed, mouth agape. "L-let me cu-cum! I'm..im-fuck!"

You chuckled once again, twisting your hand onto the head, stimulating the nerve under the tip of his cock - it made him moaned louder, messier, made his toes curl and eyes rolled back. "Youre adorable, you really think I would let you?"

"Oh please.." he begged weakly, lips almost trembling and he never look more beautiful. "H-honey please, i-im sorry-mgh shit!- please!" His thighs shook and his stomach tighten, his moaning got louder, whimpering pathetically at every second. 

His cock was soak with his own precum, wet with every pump. It made your mouth water but the fury inside your chest burn much deeper.

You grin before you removed your hand off his leaking cock, watching amusely as he sob.

"D-darlin" he whined, back arching - chasing the feeling of pleasure that had been cruelly yank from him. "Please..please.."

He looked at you with big eyes, wet with tears, pathethic and saddening.

He reached for you but you did not let him get closed, he whimpered lowly - hurt.

"Please honey? Can you..can you.." he bit his lip, he didn't even know what to ask, what to say, he wanted so many things from you, whether it be a kiss, a hug or a touch on his throbbing cock. He wanted it all and yet his tounge lay motionless on the roof of his mouth.

"Can I what?" You titled your head, watching as his throat bob and his eyes beg.

"..Kiss?" He settled with one word, doing his best to show you that he's desperate for it. "Please? I-ill be..ill be good for ya'"

"Ah yes, you will wouldn't you? Told me that earlier before you went off to talk to some woman and make me jealous"

Ted frowned and for a second you thought he's going to sob again. "I-i was- I was being a fool, I wanted to make you jealous cause i thought it would be fun but i- I was wrong"

"Of course you would say that, I mean look at you" you gestured to himself. "Laying on my bed with your cock red and leaking, pathetic"

Ted shook his head "you don't have to touch it anymore, love. You can just- can just leave me 'ere, but please don't be mad, please I was- i was a dumbass. I just wanted to-" he swallowed, his eyes suddenly not meeting your own.

"Just wanted to see how..how important i was to you and it was-it was dumb and I shouldn't have went to her but it just-i dont know, I just wanted to see.. I shouldn't have than that"

And God fucking dammit how can you be angry at him more?

"I wouldn't do it again, promise" he looked up to you then, big eyes so earnest and so hopeful and it does things to a woman like you.

"Ya dont hav'ta touch me anymore..I don't.. I don't care about it, you can just play with me and not let me finish and ill be okay but just..honey, please..dont be mad at me" he reach for your hand, the one you had used earlier to grip his throat. He pulled it slowly to his cheeks and press a kiss on the palm, all while looking at you like you hold the key to end his suffering. "Im sorry, please."

You clenched your jaw and lightly cursed, you can't fucking believe this, Ted literally have you dancing on his hand, you think you would burn the whole world if he ask this nicely.

"Youre killing me, sweetheart" you sealed your words with a passionate kiss on his wet mouth, hand now gripping his hair and pulling it. Groaning when he shudder underneath you. "You're a pain the ass, you know that? I couldn't even be mad at you properly without wanting to tell you how much I love you"

Ted, sweet sweet Ted, grinned so big, cheeks flushing red with your words as if he wasn't naked underneath you with his cock poking your ass. "I love you too"

"Dumbass" you leaned into him again, kiss him like you would never had a chance again, you captured every breath with your own mouth, swallowing anything he can offer and taking anything he can give. You lick his tounge, suck it and bit his lip. You groaned when he groaned and moaned when he moaned. He's getting needy now, humping you lightly, thighs almost trembling.

"Want to cum?" You asked lowly on his lips and Ted slowly opened his eyes, staring at you silently.

"Speak, baby." You peck his neck "Come on, tell me"

He moaned and gripped your hips tightly "d-dont know, up to ya'"

You chuckled "so if I say I don't want to and get up, you're not gonna be pissy all afternoon?"

"No" he answered quickly, the hands on your hips now settling on your back and pushing you slowly into him, embracing you with a sigh.

"Told ya', i dont care 'bout it anymore, I just want you to forgive me" he buried his face into your neck and sniff a little, it broke your heart, shattered it into a million pieces

"I thought you're gonna leave me" he whispered so lowly you almost thought it was nothing but a passing wind but once the words settled in your brain you feel like crying too.

"Oh honey.." you gripped him tight and you kinda want to hit your head on the wall for even doing this, for yelling at him, of course Ted would cry, would be so emotional, many people had left him before, many of those are the people he had never thought would leave him without looking back. He would still woke up at night with a cry of his father's name on his mouth and would still wonder how he can never be enough. You hate yourself a little more..

"Gosh, when you-when you ask to go home earlier I thought you're gonna leave me, that once we got back to the flat you'll pack up and leave" he sniff once again and you feel a little wetness on your neck.

"That you-that you would leave me and..I-i was so nervous because I couldn't loose ya', i-i just couldn't, I was prepared to do anythin' y'know? Beg on my knees or-or anythin' just to make you stay.." he gripped you more tighter, pulling you more closer, you thread your fingers into his hair and peck him on the side of his head. "I couldn't loose ya' y/n, I wouldn't.. I wouldn't know what to do"

"Shhh" you lightly pulled away and cradle his face in your palm, you wiped the tears that shed on his cheeks and kiss his forehead lightly. "Im not going to leave you, I would never, I love you so much okay? I'm sorry"

"No you don't gotta apologis-"

"No, I'm sorry" you caressed his cheeks, staring at him heatedly. "I shouldn't have..fuck, I shouldn't have done this, shouldn't have yell at you. I wish we just talk and did not let my frustration got the better of me-"

"'S okay, I understand why you're upset"

"Yes, but I should have still thought about what you would feel before I yell at you or, christ, push you in the bed and..y'know"

He smiled then and even with tears on his face it was still as pretty as ever. "'S okay, I like it"

You grinned at him and peck his nose. "Im sorry"

"Im sorry too"

You both kissed again, slower this time. Filled with love and adoration and promises that left unsaid. You sighed into his mouth before you went and kiss his neck, he shudder lightly. "Stay still, yeah?"

"Okay" he nodded his head obediently.

"Good boy" he moaned loudly on that one, cock twitching.

"You like it when I say that hm?"

Ted nod, breath broken. His tummy moved heavily underneath your palm, your fingers lightly tracing the hair depicted on his belly button.

"My good boy" you place a kiss on his collar bone. "My best boy" you peck at his throat and Ted's breath hitched, and the grip on his bedsheets tighten before you met his eyes, dark and soft and so utterly fucked out. "My love.." you kissed the spot right where his heart lay and grinned when he shudders.

Your hands went to his hips before you went down slowly, placing kisses on every skin you can reach until you're face to face with his cock, fat and thick with a large vein underneath. It dribbles with slick, dripping on his tummy staining his skin and you hummed before you licked it, gracing the tip of his dick teasingly.

Ted moaned loudly, almost like a sob.

"You have the prettiest cock I've ever seen, sweetheart" you grinned when he blush, eyes half lided and mouth agape as he looked down on you. "Pretty fucking thing, sweet too" you licked it once again and you heard him gasp.

"P-please" he whimpered, hand on your arm gently. "I cant-i can't take it anymore, please can you..oh god"

He shook when you took him all the way, fat head hitting the back of your throat. His thighs trembled and his back arched, chest sweaty and mouth chasing his breath.

"O-oh fuck! ho-honey" he whined, closing his eyes tightly as you twirled your tounge on his cock, drool dripping from the corner of your mouth and to his heavy balls.

You pulled away with a slurp, breathing heavy before you pump his wet cock quickly.

"Nghhh!" He jerked when your thumb traced his slit, stomach tightening.

"Feels good?" You ask, mesmerized on the way he looks at the moment. Blury eyes wet and looking like there's no thought on his head. "Words, Ted"

"'S good" he had slurred, closing his eyes and pushing his nose sideways on the pillow. "So-so good"

You grinned, hand slithering its way on his nipples before you flick it lightly, watching him jerked and cried out. "You look so handsome getting fucked by me"

Ted nodded his head, agreeing.

"Just ya" he mummbled "just for ya"

"Yeah? You like being handsome for me?"

"Mhm hm" he nodded his head, hips thrusting to chase for your palm, mouth agape. "Love being handsome f'you, haa fuck~" he whined when touch his heavy balls, playing with it as he shudders and shudders and a tear fell down on his eyes.

"Even with tears in your eyes you look good" you stated, pecking his cheeks before you went down once again, blowing a wind on his aching cock before you took it whole in your mouth.

Ted chocked out and arch his back, pushing it further into your warm mouth. "Ha~ oh plea-please!""

You hummed on his cock, bobbing your head up and down, nails digging on his thighs.

"Takin' me so deep, oh god h-honey" he threw his head back and groaned, exposing his throat. He briefly thrusted up, making you gag. Your eyes rolled back, you can feel your own wetness on your pants.

" 'm close, 'm close" he keeps repeating, you reach for his hand and place it at the back of your head. Encouraging him to use you like a toy, fuck your mouth like he owns it and make a mess on your throat. "I-i dont know, i- fuck!- don' wanna hurt ya-"

You rolled your eyes before pushing your head further into his cock, swallowing it and licking its length. As if saying you can handle it and Ted had actually nodded, eyes blazing with fire.

He put both of his palm on each of your cheeks, lifting your head lightly before he started thrusting up quickly, hitting the back of your throat over and over and over again mercilessly, even when drool drips and you lightly choke.

"F-fuck, ya look so fuckin' pretty" his words were so filthy but he had whined it, as if he couldn't take it. "S-so pretty with my cock in yer mouth, mhmm" he let go off one of your cheek and took a hold of your hair. " 'm gonna fuck it good, yeah?" He thrusted rather harshly "Thats what ya wa-want ain't that right?" He grinned, lazy and fucked out.

He cried out, closing his eyes before he used the grip in your hair to rapidly moved you up and down on his throbbing cock.

"Oh god" He let go of you lightly to help you breath but not even a word in youre back again on his dick, choking on it like you're meant to do so.

You're soaking at this point, your stomach tingling and your head mushy.

"F-feel so good" he had sobbed

"Feel So warm" he had followed, his pace slowing down. Dragging your own head onto his cock in a phase that you could savour his own slick before it can even drip down.

You moaned lowly before pulling his cock off your mouth, Ted whined once again before you went to his lips and kiss him, slowly, adoringly, as if pouring your own heart into it.

Your hand reach for his cock, hard and thick that you couldn't even properly grasped it.

"Mhmm" he moaned in to your mouth before you pulled away, pushing his face in your neck as you stroke him.

" 'm 'bout too, m 'bou too, o-oh god" he whimpered, pushing his face further and holding onto you for dear life.

"Let go for me" you replied, breath hot on his ears. "Be a good boy and cum on my hand"

Ted nod his head, moaning and shuddering. He grips your hips, humping your hand.

"H-honey" he whined, breath warmth and broken.

"I know" you cooed, your hand going faster. "Feels good yeah?" You pecked his shoulder

"My good boy..I love you"

He cried out on that one, going rigid as he spilled onto your hand with a loud moan followed by a whine and a sob. He trembled and his cum seems to not stop, it was warm and thick and he gripped on you tight as if you would slipped away.

"There we go, there's my good boy" you cooed at him, pulling away lightly to kiss his neck and cheeks. "My beautiful boy, you look so good"

"T-too much" he whispered, getting away from your still pumping hand and you chuckled before you pulled it away. Wiping his cam with a rag you keep on the bedside all while staring at him heave and blush from the orgasm.

"You okay?"

He nodded his head, half lided eyes open to look at you.

"Feels amazin', like I'm floating"

"Yeah?" You grinned and peck his lips, he chased for it as you pulled away. "Lets get you clean up, then dinner okay?"

Ted nod his head, smiling like he was under some drug.

"M'kay, love you. Just you"

You grinned so big you think your whole face would tear apart.

"I love you too, darling. Just you"

[random-thot-generator]

Love Thy Frenemy + Ch. 4

(Frenemies/Tenderness AU)

FOUR: Like Heartbreaking New Friends

SIMON ‘GHOST’RILEY X FRENEMY FEM READER

Summary: You and ‘Riley’ are learning to navigate this tenuous new friendship, but he’s not going to make it easy for either of you.

Warnings/Tags: Profanity, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Simon is struggling, So is Reader, No Y/N

(Notes: It’s three months after the last chapter, and Simon is sandbagging and self-sabotaging as only the big man can do, but we love him anyway. This is a shorter chapter, because I had to cut the original in half. Should have another chapter up as soon as give the next part a rewrite. Hope you enjoy.) ...  [Image via GIPHY]

Word Count: 1919

Chapter: 4

-

“We tiptoed around each other like heartbreaking new friends.”

― Jack Kerouac, On the Road

You're watching the clock. It's nearing the end of your shift and you're more than ready to go home. You'd had another row with Riley the day before and your sleep was miserable last night because of it. All you want to do right now is to lie down in a dark room and take a bloody nap.

The arguing is something that has become commonplace between the two of you. He's hot and cold, pulling you close only to push you away again, but he never takes it to the extent he did that first time. He's learned his limit with you, it seems.

Even when he's angry enough to leave, he never goes far and returns to you usually after a sleepless night for the both of you. He still tries to be angry and seethes, but he's not fooling anyone; he's a spent storm, his thunder and lightning reduced to a few low grumblings and flickering eyes. Once his storm has run its course, he resets to zero, and the process starts all over again.

When Riley ‘resets’, he usually shows up with your favorite scones or some trinket he's picked up while deployed. It's his way of apologizing now. He refuses to verbally apologize to you anymore. Apparently, you forfeited that right when you let him back into the pub that night. It seems as if he's never going to forgive you for opening that door for him. More than three months on, and he's still going out of his way to test your mettle as his friend.

He pretends to be an uncomplicated man; he is anything but. He is a high-walled fortress that's riddled with pitfalls and funhouse mirrors. You have to tread lightly with him. While you're certain he would never physically lash out at you for overstepping, he will slash you with his sharp tongue without a second thought. You've learned the hard way that his bite is worse than his bark. You've got the scars on your ego to prove it.

Still, you don't give up. You’re determined to prove him wrong. So, you’ve toughened up. You’ve grown a thicker skin, and now you watch him gnaw at you in frustration because he can’t stay away. You know this, because it’s the same for you; you can’t stay away, either. So, you just keep running at each other. It’s like a convoluted game of chicken.

You glanced back up at the clock and watched another minute tick by. You were so bloody tired...

Fiona showed up for the evening shift early, and you'd never been so happy to see someone in your life. That is, until she mentioned Riley.

"He was in a bloody mood last night," she commented darkly, tying on her apron. "Poutin' all evenin’, he was.”  She waited a beat before asking, "So, what’d ya do to set ‘im off this time?" she teased, raising her brows.

You snorted. "Oh, it was terrible, what I did! I wished him a happy anniversary."

"Wot?" she laughed, frowning in confusion. “Anniversary?”

"I meant it as a joke. It was a year ago that I loaned him that first book." You peered out the window, frowning, noting the lowering, dark clouds. "We've been friends for a year. He tried to argue that it hadn’t been that long. It was just... really stupid."

Fi snorted a derisive sound. "Are ya sure yer friends?" she quipped, nudging your arm. "The way the two of ya go at it sometimes, I worry he's goin' teh pinch yer fool head off."

You groaned when you saw a few raindrops splatter against the window. Great. You'd be walking home in the rain, from the looks of it. What a perfect way to end your shite day. You gave an absent shake of your head. "You won't ever have to worry about that," you murmured, distracted, grimacing when rain drops began to pelt the pavement outside. "Riley wouldn’t lay a finger on me. I don’t think he likes touching me. Avoids it like the plague."

You didn't notice Fiona's confused expression. She opened her mouth to say something, but you glanced up at the clock, then grabbed your bag from beneath the bar. “I’m gonna go ahead and leave before the rain gets too bad. Text me later, yeah?”

“Sure, love. Be careful,” she murmured, still a little mystified by your statement.

You left through the kitchen exit, borrowing one of the rain slickers and an umbrella from the collection kept by the door. Head down, umbrella lowered, you turned in the direction of home and set out.

Simon didn’t even recognize you when he passed by and pulled up at the curb in front of the pub. Jumping out of his truck, he hurried to the door and swept inside, startling Fiona and Ollie who were still setting up for the evening. He looked between the two of them and then glanced around. “Where is she?” he grumbled, not bothering to elaborate. They both knew who he was talking about.

“She just left. Didn’t ya see her?” Fi replied.

Simon’s hands curled into fists at his sides. “No.” He whirled around and swept back out without so much as a goodbye.

Ollie huffed a laugh and shook his head. Fiona stared after him, then turned her head to her boss. “D’ya know what Dee told meh a’fore she left? She said Riley doesn’t like touchin' her. Says he avoids it like the plague.” She quirked her brow up and grinned.

Ollie scoffed. “Fer such a bright lass, she’s dumb as a box o’ rocks sometimes,” he said, shaking his head. “The only thing that eejit’s avoidin’ is the inevitable.”

Simon found you trudging along about a block away from the Dog, umbrella held low enough to hide your face. Driving ahead of you, he pulled over to the curb and rolled down the window, waiting. When you came up beside him, he barked out, “Oi! What are ya doin’?”

You startled and stepped sideways, raising the umbrella to stare at him. “Bloody hell, Riley! You scared the daylights out of me!”

He grunted. “I have that effect on people. Ya didn’t answer my question. What are ya doin’?”

“Unnh... I’m going home. Why?”

Simon dithered between two choices: ask you to let him take you home or tell you he was taking you home. He knew how you would react to each. He made his choice without a second thought.

“Get in the truck.”

Your little scowl was instant. You hated being told what to do. “No.”

He huffed a low bark of laughter. “Turn down a free ride ‘cause yer still pissed at me? Didn’t take ya for the petty type, doll.”

Your scowl deepened. “Quit calling me doll. I’m not your stupid toy.”

His brows twitched together for just an instant, but then smoothed back out. “Quit bein’ such a bloody brat about it. Anyone with a lick o’ common sense would already be sittin’ in the damn truck.” He said it like a thinly-veiled dare.

Smug bastard.

A debate raged in your brain. You wanted to tell him to fuck off but knew how childish, how ‘bratty’ that would sound. He’d give you hell for it. Growling under your breath, you stomped around and got into the truck.

Simon rolled the window up and waited for you to get settled. He let you huff and puff yourself out, that mean little scowl still bunching your brows together as you fussed around with your bag and umbrella. When you drew your seatbelt across your lap and latched it, he put the truck back into gear and pulled back out onto the street.

He glanced over at you, noting the dark smudges under your eyes, the tired expression in them. He felt pretty much the same. He hadn’t slept for shite the night before, cursing himself and you for the stupid argument the two of you had. You just wouldn’t back down and he couldn’t. Not when you looked that good, with your ire and your color up, eyes bright and focused.

On him.

It seemed like he lived to rile you up these days. He was addicted to it, to that fire, that bloody sass, your sharp little tongue. You devolved into a snarky little brat when he pissed you off, and it drove him bloody mad.

“Need t’make a stop?”

You shook your head, letting it loll on the headrest. It was hard to stay mad at a man that owned a truck with seat warmers. “’M fine. Just along for the ride,” you murmured, closing your eyes. You snuggled deeper into the seat and sighed.

It was hard for him to stay focused on the road with you looking like that. You looked so damn pretty that way, completely trusting of him, eyes closed, your body relaxed. Even your scowl had evened out, your brow now smooth and uncreased, all the anger and stress dissipated. His fingers twitched, wanting to reach out and wrap around that spot just above your knee. He wanted to curl his fingers into the soft flesh there, tuck them into the bend of your knee, caress it with his thumb...

He blinked when headlights flashed, drawing him out of his thoughts. Scowling, he doubled his efforts to refocus on the road. He threw an angry glance your way. Every sodding time he got around you, he ended up like this. His eyes slid back to you of their volition before he forced them back on the road, gritting his teeth. He needed a bloody distraction.

“Yer a shite date, Dee. This why yer home every night watchin’ the telly?”

He was expecting your eyes to snap open with anger sparking in them. He was expecting that mean little scowl and a hissed insult. He didn’t get any of that. Instead, your brows furrowed up over your closed eyes, and you gave a gentle scoff, flopping your arms in your lap. “Ugh... please, Ri. I’m so tired.”

And just like that, the flame inside him was tamped down, his head cooling as his chest warmed. The way you said it, not angry, just so bloody tired.

Back in control and feeling contrite, he let the tension fall out of his shoulders and settled more comfortably into his seat with a sigh. “Yeah. Alright... Dee,” he rumbled out, soft and low. “Jus’ rest.”

You both rode in silence for a long minute, and then you reached over and took his hand. He flinched, but you didn’t pull away, hanging on with a gentle hold. “I don’t mind you calling me doll, Riley. I just don’t like everyone calling me that. It’s not for them, ya know?”

Simon swallowed past the lump in his throat. It wasn’t for them. It was for him. Just him.

He squeezed your hand. “Yeah. I get it, doll.”

You nodded and closed your eyes again, letting your hand slip back to your lap. It wasn’t long before your breaths evened out and deepened.

Simon drove around Banfield for another hour, just to let you sleep.

-

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[omg-im-such-a-masochist]

Sleepwalking

Pairings: Jon Moxley x Reader

Warnings: +18

Tag: @theworldofotps , @writtingrose , @aerynscrichton , @daddyhausen , @melissahausen , @unoficialy-married-to-ace-austin , @sophiewolfheart-blog , @sultryfandoms , @new-zealand-chic , @crowleysqueenofhell , @thealliasylum , @legit9thlunaticwarrior , @baysexuality , @josiewrites , @seeingstarks , @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch , @whenimakeitshine1234 , @moxkindagirl , @sunshinevirus , @im-just-a-mississippi-girl

🎶You’re the one that I want…

Across the large hall, amid evening gowns and tuxedos, he stood. Those intense blue eyes could not be mistaken by anyone other than himself, and even after two years they still held the same amount of power over her as they once did.

He always had the worst timing. Every time, without fail, he decided to reappear from the ashes like a Fenix after she somehow managed to get a hold of her life once again. A part of her thinks he does this on purpose, he has a silent pleasure in watching her suffer whenever he decides to show up in her life again. Whenever he decides to reclaim her body, her heart pays the price, but not this time.

She crossed the hall towards the dark corner of the room, confident steps guided her to him once more, to what she hoped to be the last time.

“Who let you come in? I don’t recall sending you an invitation” She stated. Her posture was impeccable, back and knees straightened, shoulders back, head never once looking down, hands confidently and delicately placed on top of each other in front of her stomach.

School me to what makes you shake shake it off…

She certainly changed, and that was the first thing Mox noticed when he instantly found her being the center of attention in a crowd of rich people. The confidence that once lacked in her was now abundant enough to be categorized as arrogance, and even from afar, Mox could tell that she had learned how to be one of them. She was incredibly smart and had a certain ease to adapt to the environment she was in, it was one of the qualities he most admired in her. She knew people from different social statuses, attended diverse gatherings and knew how to properly behave in all of them. But that wasn’t what surprised him the most, what did catch him off guard though was the wedding announcement in the gossip column of The New York Times.

“The public announcement was enough of an invitation for me. I didn’t know I would need a formal card asking me to come, although I have a feeling you wouldn’t want someone like me attending your high society party”

“Follow me” She demanded quickly, before turning around and taking the stairs up to the terrace.

Mox cackled as he followed her, his eyes roamed through her figure, drowning in the sight of the only woman who was able to keep him in check. The fancy clothes added to her natural royalty appeal, and that was the first thing that drew his attention to her in that indie wrestling show over 10 years ago: her royal aura. She was the princess that his bad boy self couldn’t wait to get a hold of, the proof that he could achieve something solid, good, and worthy in life even though he barely had money to keep himself alive.

Her heels stopped clicking once they reached the terrace, “Well” She turned around to face him, “What is it that you want this time, Jonathan?”

Though I'm degenerate he's the fool who's going to bore you to death…

“Jonathan?” Mox chuckled “Are nicknames not allowed in your world anymore, kitty? Are they too poor for your upper-class vocabulary?” He continued to stare at her and kept drowning in her beauty. She was still drop-dead gorgeous, only now her doll-like beauty had been covered by heavy amounts of makeup to make her lose her innocent appearance and gain more of a womanly look.

“Nicknames are reserved for friends” She shrugged lightly

“Am I not your friend?”

“You’re an acquaintance, Jonathan. Nothing more, nothing less. Just an acquaintance”

“Hmmm,” Mox hummed, his heavy boots now stomping on the hardwood floor as he took three more steps toward her until he was close enough to feel the warmth radiating from her skin.

“I don’t think acquaintances would do half the things we did, kitty cat”

“That’s in the past now, Jonathan. Things have changed”

“Did they though? Because I’m pretty sure I still have the same effect on you as you do on me” Mox’s fingers traced her exposed collarbone, and the electricity of his touch on her skin continued to be as alive as it ever was. The sparkle was still present, the desire, the attraction, the primal need, and the urge to get intoxicated in each other until nothing else existed survived the years and was as strong as ever.

“You’re wrong” She lied effortlessly as she did so many times before in front of the mirror whenever he abandoned her.

“Am I?” Mox wrapped his fingers at the base of her neck, subtly pulling her closer to his lips. “So you won’t mind if I put your statement to the test?”

He's super rich and privileged

Sleepwalking for so many years

He looks good stock, he seems well bred

Sleepwalking for so many years…

“I don’t have to prove you shit!” She hissed, fists balling beside her in an attempt to keep her anger under control.

A sly smirk plastered on Moxley’s lips upon hearing her small curse. “So there’s still some realness in you even after you sat on the money throne, huh? I knew you wouldn’t let me down”.

“What the hell do you want, Jonathan?”

“You’re not going to do that, are you?” Mox’s lips brushed against hers, his rough voice was low, almost a whisper as his warm peppermint breath caressed her skin. “You’re not going to destroy your life like that, I won’t let you do it”.

“Of course, because only you are allowed to destroy my heart and make my life miserable, no?”

“He’s the one who’ll make you miserable, kitten. I’ve seen his pictures, he doesn’t have what it takes to be with you”

“Says the lying asshole who never kept his promises and abandoned me whenever he had the chance”

“I’ve never done any of that and you know it” Moxley’s fingers teased the pulse point of her neck, he drew small circles on the sensitive flesh until they eventually traveled to her nape. “I never lied to you”.

“You said you loved me”

“I did” Mox tilted her neck back until her eyes could stare up at him.

You're the one that I need…

He laid a tempting peck on her lips before whispering “And I still do”. The intense baby blue eyes stared into her soul, and she could feel herself getting overwhelmed by his presence. Whenever she was with him, Moxley turned her into a shy young girl again, the one who was more than prepared to discover the world with the blonde bad boy.

“I kept all of my promises, even when I didn’t want to. I promised to stay away and I did, I promised to never get in touch with you again, and I kept my word. You didn’t want me anywhere near you again, so I did what you asked me to, even though my instincts told me not to”

“I thought you were going to come after me, Jonathan. But you left!”

“You told me to-“

“I was 21 for fuck’s sake! Do you think I meant any of the shit I said to you? I was just a dumb kid trying to get her boyfriend’s attention! I wanted you to come after me at least once, Jon. For the first time in our relationship, I wanted to feel like you cared enough to ask me to stay, I wanted you to fight for us-” She felt her words being swallowed by Mox’s lips.

His hands cupped her cheeks, fingers traced the hairline in her nape before pulling the metal side comb away from her hair. Moxley’s hands buried into the cascade of locks, reveling in the feeling of having her soft mane in his palms once again.

I'm a degenerate but no fool who's going to bore you to death…

“You always talked too much” He whispered in a teasing tone against her wet lips once they broke the kiss.

“You can’t do this, Jon” Her tongue darted out to taste the remaining flavor of his gum on her lips, “You can’t just show up whenever you feel like it and expect me to drop everything-“

“Come with me, kitty cat” His arms closed around her waist, pulling her closer to his body enough for her to feel his erection pressing against her stomach. “I want you to come with me, you know you want to come with me. You don’t belong here”.

“Jon, please. I can’t do this”

Mox intertwined their fingers and began to pull her towards the fire exit, “Come with me, kitten. I promise you won’t regret it”, was the last thing he whispered before the darkness of the stairs engulfed his figure.

[karebear923]

Get To Know Me Tag

Thank you so much @befuddledcinnamonroll for tagging me! I really enjoy these tag games to learn about each other!

Do you make your bed?

Sometimes yes, but by that I mean I half fold/half bundle up the sheets and toss them on top of my pillow. So no, not really 😅

What's your favorite number?

Never really had one, but I like when things can be evenly split, so even numbers and groups of five are satisfying 👌🏽

What is your job?

I’m currently a certified pharmacy technician. I used to be the manager but I had to step down when I went back to school cause I couldn’t be full time anymore.

If you could go back to school, would you?

Here I go with my long winded answers again 😅

If we’re talking go back in time to when I was younger and in school then yes. I fear I peaked in high school, and with my current knowledge of life I’d do so many things differently.

If we’re talking go back to school now for a career change, that’s what I’m currently doing. I’m not using my first degree, so I’m in school to be an X-ray technologist and I hope to move up to CT or MRI afterwards.

If we’re talking go back to school now just for funsies, then yes again. I love languages and wish I could properly learn so many! I took Italian in college which I picked up pretty easily cause it’s so similar to Spanish (my first language), ma capisco più che parlo. Non ho nessuno con cui praticare.

Can you parallel park?

Yes but I get so nervous about hitting other cars 🙈 I’d prefer not to do it.

A job you had that would surprise people?

I think what’s most surprising is that I’ve only ever had one real job. I’ve done volunteer and community work, and some research stuff but a formal wage-paying job I’ve only had one of. I’ve had many position changes within that job, though.

Do you think aliens are real?

I don’t rule out the possibility of advanced life on another planet but I’m also not thinking about it on the regular.

Can you drive a manual car?

Definitely not lol. I didn’t learn to drive until I was 26 😬 and I’m turning 29 this year…

What's your guilty pleasure?

Honestly it’s BLs, cause of the stigma around it. But if I’m around strangers I can talk about it! I met so many nice BL fans at an event back in February. It’s just hard to find people who get it.

Anything else though, I’m loud and proud! Haters to the left! 💁🏽‍♀️

Tattoos?

I’ve always wanted one! But I’m so indecisive on what to get! There is this one design I really want but then I think about it and I’m like “but where to place it???” 😭

Favorite color?

Green!!! But also purple and white

Favorite type of music?

I listen to a lot of different genres but I like pop music the most. Of course I’m into Kpop, and I love an 80’s synth sound!

Do you like puzzles?

Omg yes, I love brain teaser-type puzzles! I do the daily NYT games whenever I can and I love trivia shows and riddles and problem solving games! So fun!

Any phobias?

I’m scared of heights but I can be brave sometimes. I really don’t like slimy things like slugs and snails or boogers.

Favorite childhood sport?

I love swimming! I was actually on my high school swim team! I did the IM which is all strokes but I also did the Butterfly 🏊🏼‍♀️ and my team started the school’s synchronized swimming team too! 🙆🏽‍♀️🌊

Do you talk to yourself?

All the time! But who doesn’t? And to my pets and stuff too.

What movies do you adore?

I used to love going to the movies but I haven’t been back much since covid. And I don’t really seek out older movies to watch. But I love romance so stuff like Pride & Prejudice and Fools Rush In. And my family loves Disney so Tarzan, and The Incredibles are my faves! We rewatch a lot of Disney films all the time.

Coffee or tea?

I very much enjoy tea but I seldom drink it. I should change that 🤔 and I’m unfortunately chronically tired and need coffee to survive 😞 but I don’t get the complex drinks, just a regular coffee, 2-3 cups a day.

First thing you wanted to be growing up?

Uhh idk really. My answer was always changing, I never had a *dream* career 🤷🏽‍♀️

Not sure who hasn’t been tagged but I’d love to read your responses! No pressure though!

@buckystilinski @stormyoceans @petrichoraline @poetry-protest-pornography @absolutebl @heretherebedork

[ralfstrashcan]

Heads Up, Seven Up!

Look who's showing her face again around here after almost a year of radio silence XD this smashing comeback is thanks to the one and only @silver-lily-louise who tagged me in a little writer's challenge.

(Before I get into that though I need to yell about your post for a sec because it sent me into a giggling fit. Not only the genius wordplay with Seven's name in the beginning but also the fic snippet itself because damn, you really nailed the characterization of both of them! I can see Seven's doubtingly raised eyebrow and Harry trying to play it off and being all breezy even though he is a cinnamon roll and can't fool anyone into thinking differently... I enjoyed every second of that!)

Now, the Challenge!

Share the last seven sentences you wrote.

Well, let's see. I'm currently (=since February) working on my German Attack on Titan fanfic (which is why I've been MIA on ao3, if anyone's been wondering...) Fun Fact, I've already mentioned that fic once on here a loooong while ago and the line from then doesn't exist in this form anymore, hahaha! Anyway, back then was chapter 3, what I'll share now is from chapter 18. I decided to leave it at six sentences because they form a unit of meaning and since they're German sentences they're still more than 1,5x as long as Louise's 9 - and almost twice as long in English, because of course - so I think we're good XD Here goes!

Levi examined his charges who were lined up in front of him like organ pipes. With their vastly differing level of knowledge it wouldn't make sense to provide Eren and Mikasa with the same training. Mikasa had already mastered much more than just the basics of self defense and if Levi recalled his little sparring session with Eren in the waiting room of his studio and Eren's subsequent performance on the punching bag then there was no doubt that Eren braved any fight on enthusiasm and overflowing anger alone, not on any kind of understanding of fighting techniques. Armin at least had a solid grasp on the essentials but nothing more. It was now around six thirty so there were roughly two and a half hours left until the Titans would likely tell them the place for the hostage exchange and they'd discuss their plan of action. He would make the most of it.

And of course, here's the German original:

Levi musterte seine Schützlinge, die aufgereiht vor ihm standen wie die Orgelpfeifen. Bei einem so unterschiedlichen Wissensstand war es nicht sinnvoll, Eren und Mikasa dasselbe Training angedeihen zu lassen. Mikasa beherrschte bereits weit mehr als nur die Grundlagen der Selbstverteidigung und wenn Levi sich an sein kleines Gefecht mit Eren im Wartezimmer seines Studios und auch dessen anschließende Vorstellung am Boxsack erinnerte, war klar, dass Eren jeden Kampf allein mit Enthusiasmus und überschäumender Wut bestritt, nicht aber mit irgendeinem Verständnis von Kampftechniken. Armin hatte zumindest ein solides Basiswissen, mehr allerdings nicht. Es war jetzt ungefähr halb sieben, also hatte er noch etwa zweieinhalb Stunden Zeit, bis sich die Titanen mutmaßlich mit dem Ort des Geiselaustauschs melden und sie ihr genaues Vorgehen besprechen würden. Er würde das Beste draus machen.

I'm pretty sure the expression with the organ pipes does not exist in English but I decided to go with a literal translation anyway XD

Thanks for reading, if you made it through all of my rambles ;D

[bbrandy2002]

I posted 117 times in 2022

10 posts created (9%)

107 posts reblogged (91%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@ao719

@burnsoslow

@charlotteg234

@kingliam2019

@dcbbw

I tagged 23 of my posts in 2022

#queued - 9 posts

#the royal romance - 5 posts

#king liam - 5 posts

#liam x mc - 5 posts

#trr - 5 posts

#liam x riley - 5 posts

#bbrandy2002 - 3 posts

#fools rush in - 3 posts

#long post - 2 posts

#choices - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 35 characters

#who says we dont work in the summer

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Happy Sunday @charlotteg234

🥵 Enjoy!

13 notes - Posted April 10, 2022

#4

An Apology

Several months ago I accused someone of sending me a hate anon. I've thought about that ordeal from time to time, but even more so recently.

Being in a place in my life where Im not so stressed out anymore or disillusioned by every little thing, Im able to make rational thoughts and think things through a little clearer. Looking back at old messages with someone else, I have a pretty solid feeling I know who actually did send them and thankfully they're not around here any longer.

With that said, when Im wrong, I say Im wrong. And in that instance ... I was wrong. Even if I never said her name publicly, I would like to apologize to @queenrileyrose for my accusations and the hurt you experienced following that. I've already done so privately and the nature of that conversation will remain so.

I can't undo what happened, I can only try to make it right.

Here's to 2022 being about positivity and kindness. Again, my humblest apologies to QRR.

13 notes - Posted January 3, 2022

#3

Happy Birthday to ...me lol

I have to take a moment here to show off these two amazing commissions my bestie @burnsoslow and my great friend @ao719 had done for my birthday.

The first piece by Burns is from her ORDIV Ch 33 when Liam proposed to Riley in the gazebo at Valtoria where the had their first day 🥺🥺🥺

The second one is from Anitah, who used a scene from the fic Burns wrote for my birthday last year Heaven, Hell or Houston when Liam and Riley had met at the bar and when on this whirlwind date, kissing at every stop light 😍

Two of my favorite scenes captured so perfectly and it makes my heart swell so big.

Thank you both so much for these precious works that I will cherish and most likely stare at everyday for weeks to come. I love you both with all my heart and thank you for making another year of getting older a lot more bearable and for your friendship that I value so hard!

59 notes - Posted May 19, 2022

#2

Fools Rush In

Chapter 21

Book: TRR

Pairing: Liam x Riley

Series Premise: With two weeks before he is set to marry Madeleine, the guys throw Liam an impromptu bachelor party that results in him (and Drake) leaving Vegas with more than he bargained for.

Word count: 3900 -ish

Warning: Language

Soooo ... hey lol It's been a hot minute since I've written or posted anything (or just been around in general). Anyway, I came back to several messages asking about this chapter. I actually had 90% of it written back in October and just thought it was pure shit and gave up on it ... actually, I gave up on writing altogether. Having some time this week, I opened up the doc, rewrote some things, deleted out some stuff and finally managed to finish it. It's still not even close to what I wanted it to be, as it's the end of this arc, but I've decided to just have fun writing again. If there's anything Ive learned during my time away it's that none of us will ever write the perfect story, or use the perfect words, or have the most compelling characters and it's okay; I think I finally have accepted that. Just have fun doing it!

This concludes my TedTalk

---------------------------

“Doctor ... Wolfschitz?” a bewildered Alyssa questioned.

“That’s no damn doctor!” Drake bore his eyes into the former prince, who was already howling with laughter, dodging a pillow that whirled in his direction from Drake. “What the actual fuck is your problem, Leo?”

Leo clutched his side, trying to catch his breath. “The look on your face, man … I can't. I really had you going there for a minute didn’t I, Walker? Afraid you were about to lose that new pee-pee, huh?” He continued to laugh riotously at Drake’s expense before his gaze hastily shifted its attention toward Alyssa. “Why’d you blow my cover, thong girl?”

“Thong girl? Alyssa muttered, absentmindedly crossing her legs while attempting to hide the fact her face was quickly glowing bright pink. How’d he know I was wearing one?

“Why are you here, Leo?” Drake repeated as Leo casually strolled up to his bed and scooped up a chocolate pudding cup from Drake’s food tray. “And how in the sam hell did you even know I was in the hospital?

“Came with Liam,” he replied nonchalantly as he plopped his ass down on the end of the bed and peeled off the top of his pudding cup, licking the plastic wrap clean. “He’s down the hall with Riley right now. Seems my little brother is a prized stud after all … got that Rys sperm in him, ya know? Knocked her up real good yo. Hafta say … I’m impressed.”

“Knocked her up?” Alyssa gasped before stepping closer to him. “Hold up; Riley’s pregnant?”

Leo nodded and shoveled a giant heap of pudding into his mouth. “Yeah. I’m going to be an uncle again --” he eyed Drake’s plate contemplatively, “ -- You gonna eat the rest of that meatloaf, man?” Drake scowled and pushed his tray toward the hungry Prince.

Alyssa quickly put all the clues together. “So that’s why Riley was so sick earlier? She didn’t have a concussion, --” she smiled endearingly, “ -- she just had morning sickness. ... Well, is she okay? Is the baby okay? The fall didn’t hurt them, did it?”

Leo, concentrating on finishing the rest of that meatloaf, languidly shrugged. “I dunno.”

“Well, did they at least give her something safe for her back pain yet?” Alyssa probed further.

Leo shoved another large bite of meatloaf and again answered. “I dunno.”

“Oh my God! Do you know anything?” A frustrated Alyssa finally asked.

With a mouthful of food, Leo tilted his head back in deep thought and replied the best he could, “I know this meatloaf is fucking BOMB, dude. Not too shabby for hospital grub.” He swallowed heartily. “The pudding on the other hand … absolute shit.” He tapped the edge of the plastic container with his plastic spoon as he spoke to it, “Snack-Pak, you disappoint me.”

Desperate for an answer, Alyssa reached out and grasped Leo’s shirt, jerking him closer. “Fuck the snack-pak, Wolfshitz; what about Riley?”

“Riley? Oh, she never disappoints me …” Leo sideways glanced with a frown. “Liam on the other hand ...”

Stunned by this strange man’s erratic and seemingly unhinged behavior, Alyssa shot a wide-eyed glare at Drake, who just shook his head slowly. “Don’t try to make sense of him, Alyssa. Just don’t. You’ll never be able to figure him out.”

Needing to be reassured, Alyssa pulled a cell phone from her back pocket and started furiously shooting off a text to Riley. While her back was turned to the men, Drake couldn’t help but notice the way her ass hugged perfectly in those skinny jeans and soon realized his new body part had showed up in tandem with his sudden arousal. With Leo’s interest remaining focused on the damn meatloaf for the time being, Drake eased a hand under the white sheet covering him and felt around the area below his waist; his breath hitched with relief at the rock-solid bulge that had erupted. Feeling a little giddy that everything was working as it should, the euphoria soon subsided when he caught a glimpse of Leo’s saucy gaze on Alyssa.

Overcome with a strong sense of jealousy over the girl he’d just caught sneaking a peek at his naked self less than five minutes ago, Drake quietly urged through gritted teeth, “Stop looking at her like that, Leo! She’s not some conquest you can just sack for your sick playboy pleasures.”

“Says the guy who caught panty crickets from a $2 hooker and needed a dick transplant.” Leo retorted with a smirk. “Besides, father always said, ‘I see it, I like it, I want it, I got it.” He wagged his tongue in lust. “And I see that.” He motioned to Alyssa’s backside.

See the full post

73 notes - Posted April 7, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

First Comes Love

Chapter One

Book: The Royal Romance -Complete AU

Pairing:Liam x Riley/Liam x Madeleine (I promise Maddie’s nice here)

A/N: This will most likely be a mini-series; no more than 5 or 6 chapters.This is loosely based on a movie you might recognize but I’ve tried to make it my own. 

Series Premise: It's destiny when two people from different worlds meet. Riley is an up-and-coming wedding planner who finds herself tasked with planning the biggest wedding of her career, only to find out the man she fell for after a brief encounter in NYC is the groom ... and a king.

Trigger Warnings: There is a mention of suicidal ideation, but it’s not part of the plot. Some minor language.

Thank you @burnsoslow for pre-reading. All grammar errors are my own.

It’s been so long since I’ve started a new fic, I don’t even know if I have a taglist that isn’t filled with people who have left or hate me now; I guess I’m starting all over again. If you want tagged, let me know.

New York City

Liam zoned out 2.1 seconds after stepping inside a trendy office on the upper floors of a high-rise building in downtown Manhattan. The pale pink shades of the walls, decorative cushions, window scarfing, and gloss on the lips of his future bride, screamed out bottles of Pepto to the new King -- if only he had some to help with the unease in the pit of stomach.

That morning, a meeting with a highly renowned woman was on the agenda, discussing and presenting potential options for his upcoming nuptials, just weeks away. Even under normal circumstances, a wedding wasn’t exactly something that excited Liam. Not that he was never thrilled for the couple and wished them all the happiness in the world, it just held little importance in his day-to-day life. Weddings served as yet another reminder of what he wanted -- and what he couldn't have. 

It was amusing to Liam how he could hold so much power, yet wielded none of it for himself.

This wasn’t how it was supposed to be.

The owner of this particular firm, Jill Gordon, had built quite the reputation as the elite among modern event design, planning, and production companies, with a specialty in weddings. The clientele included a long list of celebrities, politicians, affluent Manhattan debutantes, and occasionally acquired foreign business. The latter is how Madeleine first heard of The Jill Gordon Company while attending the French Ambassador's ceremony several months ago as a representative for Cordonia. With the last stop of their engagement tour in New York City, the future queen was eager to add a visit to her appointment book before they returned home and began the laborious task of planning the biggest wedding in Cordonian history.

Although the palace had more than their fair share of staff with experience hosting monumental events, such as balls, state dinners, and various celebrations, there hadn’t been a royal wedding there in over 20 years. Madeleine thought someone with experience handling grand-scale weddings with a sophisticated flair, who could share their vision and expertise with the staff and take charge of the arrangements, would guarantee everything went off without a hitch. 

The King simply went along to get along.

Madeleine and Liam sat across from Jill at her glass-top desk, where a single, lone laptop sat catty-corner on top. While the owner enthused and embellished her business to an attentive Madeleine, Liam focused on the assemblage of black-and-white portraits meticulously placed in neat rows along the wall behind the woman’s desk. It was no doubt a deliberate focal point to showcase the clients her agency had done work for in the past. Maybe others who had previously sat in the same chair he sat in at that moment were charmed with the love and joy captured in each of those images; the twinge in Liam’s heart wasn’t buying into it. 

After a lengthy social season and with a lot of pressure from his father and the council, he’d chosen Madeleine to become his queen. At first, he couldn’t stand her -- Hell, maybe he never could. She was pretentious, overbearing, cunning, and frequently insensitive. But somewhere between his coronation and the beginning of the tour, she changed almost as if overnight. At that first stop in Fydelia, he noticed a more relaxed, more thoughtful, and just easier to be around Madeleine. It’s possible she’d finally gotten the coveted prize she had obsessed over long before being dumped after Leo abdicated and could put aside some of that anxiety that brought out the worst in her. But to Liam, it seemed to be a little something more: either the Countess had come to her senses about her standoffish behavior, or maybe it was this new business venture Hana and Rashad talked her into, causing a distraction for the Countess. 

Whatever it was, was a welcome change. Liam had grown to respect her, find some common ground, and put away some of that overwhelming dread about spending the rest of his life with her. And while it was no secret between the two that there wasn’t more than friendly affection, duty made no exceptions when it came to their obligation. 

For both of them, that's precisely what this was. Now it was time to make the best of it and move forward.

Jill sat forward in her swivel chair with a warm smile. Her hands splayed on the glass top as she spoke in a refined tone. “I have the perfect person in mind to handle such an important wedding, as yours… that is if you choose to go with us.” Jill quickly added, not wanting to scare them off with too much pressure, too soon. She knew adding a royal wedding to her list would attract mass attention in the press and social circles for her business, which meant huge profits.

“Really?” Madeleine crowed, glancing over at Liam, who promptly brandished an over-enthused smile before she turned her attention back to Jill. “Tell us more about her.”

“Elaine has over twenty-three years of experience and is the best in this business, and has served most of our biggest named clients. She recently planned the President’s granddaughter’s wedding.” Jill boasted.

“I heard of that one …” Madeleine swooned before adding, “glamorous, yet sophisticated and classy, which is exactly what we’re looking for. Would she have time to meet with us now?”

Jill frowned. “I apologize, but she’s actually booked for the day, preparing for another wedding this evening. A busy lady that one is. Let me see what her calendar looks like.” She moved the mouse beside her laptop around and clicked a few times, pausing momentarily to scan the screen. “She’s free in the morning if you’re able to return then.”

Liam, who had been studying the glass wall that separated Jill’s office from the reception area and wondering why in the hell anyone would want to be watched while they worked, finally contributed to the discussion for the first time since walking in. “We’re actually leaving first thing in the morning.”

“Not until 9:30,” Madeleine hastily clarified. She continued cheerfully, “Tonight marks the official end of our engagement tour, and we’re wrapping up with a celebration in Midtown. We fly out tomorrow.”

“That's wonderful!" Jill replied. "Perhaps the two of you can stop in before your flight in the morning and meet Elaine personally and see if we can work out an agreement. I don’t think you’ll regret it,” she trilled, able to conceal the shameless desperation behind her words like a true professional. 

Well schooled in body language and tone, Liam smirked to himself, able to hear it anyway.

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119 notes - Posted January 2, 2022

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[fictionkinfessions]

I am just going to spit this out into the vast ocean and hope for the best. I dont expect pity or anything. I don't deserve sympathy for what I've done.

Hi. I'm the keroro from earlier this year who said he disliked himself in the "least favourite kintype" ask game. um. things have Not gotten better. Thank you to everyone who originally responded, showing me love, but. I can't say I particularly deserve it. There's too much going on right now in my brain for me to articulate what I mean, but god, do I suck . Every time I have to be reminded that me and my boyfriend cannot be seen or heard together because of canon circumstances i get one step closer to just fucking losing it.

I hurt people, I hurt and traumatised people who were my CHILDHOOD FRIENDS, because I was a stupid fucking kid who didn't know and I grew up to become a monumental fuck-up who knew better AND STILL HURT PEOPLE because i "had to for the greater good", and now look where I am.

Hated and despised and unwanted.

I'm so stupid. Why did I think that even for a second that things would get Better? That one day, I'd look him in the eyes and we'd be together without consequence. That we could kiss, call each other lovers.

I'm a fucking idiot. A self-centered one too. Always chasing after my own ideals instead of facing reality. I'm such a coward.

Dororo, if you're out there, somewhere,

I'm sorry.

I hate myself so much for what I did to you. You didn't deserve a second of what I put you through and there isn't a day where my heart doesn't ache because of it. It keeps me up at night sometimes, and I've gotten to the point where looking at our source is actively painful to do because i know things don't get better.

You needed better. and i, being a fool, couldn't BE that better for your sake.

Unfortunately, I love you. And because of it, I hope we never meet again. I hope your life without me is good, and that you flourish the way you were supposed to. The way your mother would've truly wanted. She was always such a kind woman, i hate that i was such a brat and took it for granted.

Take care of yourself. Take care of Giroro too, lord knows he's always getting up to something. But just... take care of yourself, mostly. Please.

I don't want you to get hurt anymore.

-- Capt. Keroro, who needs to go emotionally sober up after this (please tag as fictive . sorry this ask is loaded with self hatred. im trying to work on it, but it's hard and i keep spiralling. please have a good day/night, mpc.)

📦

[sapphicshawol]

.

[xpeachesncream]

acquainted | five

> series masterlist <

summary: the biggest goal of a grad student is to get through school in one piece - no petty drama involved, no sweating over the little things. however, that plan almost always never follows through. sometimes, you can’t help but fall into the most unthinkable, unexpected traps and learn the hard way. like, exhibit a: being unable to resist your engaged, substitute teacher, kim seokjin.

pairing: (2nd bts member to be revealed) x reader x engaged!teacher!seokjin

genre: grad school au, student life au | fluff, angst, smut (to come)

words: 4.2k

warnings: implied sexual content, cussing / mature language, relationship issues, angst, club scene, alcohol consumption, intoxication, seokjin is ready to risk it all cause reader is a huge flirt, the love triangle mess shall begin

notes: AH IM SORRY, THAT’S ALL I HAVE TO SAY?!? I TRIED to make this as fair as possible, but i..... clearly have an issue and just really wanted this to be messy lmao 

tags: @laurynne5 @yiyi4657 @miinoongi @teamtardis-notdead @bluesharksandfish​ @photographic-girl (pls msg me if you would like to be added to the taglist!)

"Waddup bro." Namjoon steps aside to let Jin in. "Wasn't expecting you to come by since we're seeing each other tonight." Jin chuckled.

"Fuck, that's right." Joon laughs as he hands Jin a bottle of water before sitting.

"What, you forgot? You planned this for your own stepbrother."

"No, I know. Just a lot of things going on." He sips on his water, manspreading in Namjoon's loveseat in the livingroom. He tilts his head back and closes his eyes, the headache he felt earlier this morning no longer as bad, but still lingered. After getting home last night, he had tried to push you out of his mind, but failed miserably. It didn't help that he really and genuinely tried to clear the air with Grace, only for her to push him off and sleep on the far end of their bed.

"You alright? What's going on? I feel like I haven't seen you this stressed in a really long time. Last time was probably when you were planning your proposal." Jin softly chuckles, his head still tilted back.

"Yeah, it's been quite the shit show lately."

"Can't be that bad, can it? Have you and Grace been fighting?"

"A tad."

"A tad? The way you're acting right now says it's much more than a tad."

"We've been distant. Busy. We don't do things together anymore." He shortens the shpeel cause quite frankly, he's tired of repeating the story even though he hasn't told many people.

"Why don't you guys talk about it?"

"We can't communicate properly. I try, she gets even more upset and blows me off."

"It's probably just a rough patch in your relationship. I'm sure if you just give each other enough space, you could figure out how to fix things and have a serious conversation about where you both are at and what you need from each other. Remind each other that you're a team, and not working against each other." Jin's slightly shot his head up, his eyebrow raised.

"That's actually pretty solid advice coming from you."

"Shut up, you need help right?" Joon laughs.

"You're right though, it's just been hard. I feel like we've been constantly pushing each other away."

"You two are stubborn."

"Yup, that too." Jin sipped his water.

"I know that's not the only thing on your mind." If it was anyone in Jin's circle, you could count on Namjoon to figure things out before you can even say anything to him. "It's a little hard to believe you came over here to tell me this." In which, he's right. Jin never really talked about his relationship problems, let alone did he go out of his way to tell his friends what was going on. It was more of a thing that naturally came up in conversation when they were all together.

"Don't know what you're talking about." Joon shakes his head.

"Who is she?" Jin watches Namjoon's curious eyes as he leans into the palm of his hand. He was trying to come up with excuses or find ways to see himself out of his conversation, but he couldn't. Namjoon was too smart for this. If it were Yoongi or Hoseok, maybe he could get away with it. The only thing that Jin can come up with is a stupid smirk before he shakes his head and breaks eye contact. "See."

"See what?"

"That smirk. You can't tell me I don't know that smirk. I've been there before, dude. Who is she?" He repeats, causing Jin to succumb to defeat.

"She's a grad student in my creative writing class." Namjoon pauses before he bursts out in laughter.

"I need to sit back and get comfy on my couch for this." He says leaning back and crossing his arms. "She's a grad student? What's her name?" Jin nods.

"Y/N. 25 and so fucking attractive. It's frustrating." Jin groans into his hands.

"And you're telling me you see her more than just a distraction? I mean, I have to ask cause you are going through a rough patch with Grace." Although this is definitely not what Namjoon agrees with, he was only going to advise Jin on how to approach things. But execution-wise, it was up to Jin because this was his life. Namjoon was only part of it.

"She's smart, and she's fun. And.. she's refreshing."

"What did she do to make you feel this way?"

"She kissed me. In my classroom. And," Jin swallows the lump in his throat. "It happened again last night. It almost escalated into other things. But she stopped it." He quickly says because he can see Namjoon's facial expression changing. "She stopped it and she put me in my place because it just made things even more complicated. She said that we should keep our distance from each other."

"Which, she's right Jin. You really can't be doing this." Namjoon says sternly. "Please don't be stupid. This can hurt alot of people, especially since you're still engaged to Grace."

"I know, but likeeeeee--"

"No but's." Joon shook his head. Honestly, he didn't expect this behavior from Jin and it concerned him. "I can't force you on how to act, that's solely up to you. But you need to understand that it has to be one or the other, it can't be both. You either try and work things out with Grace and leave Y/N alone, or you call it quits with Grace."

"Y/N has been occupying my mind lately and it's been hard to push her out."

"Maybe that should be a sign as to what you need to do?" Joon sighs. "I don't know. I don't know her, so I can't say much, but are you really ready to throw away all these years with Grace for her? Like, is it really that serious?" Jin shrugged.

"I don't know, she doesn't want this."

"Correction - she doesn't want this because you're engaged. It's obvious that things would be different if the circumstances changed."

"I love Grace. A lot. We've been through so many things together, lots of ups and downs that taught us things."

"Yeah, and I love you both. I love Grace like a sister. But you can't stick around just because of history and because you both are comfortable, if that's what it really comes down to. It's not fair for both parties. If you find out that this is the end of your relationship with Grace, then it's the end."

"I'm just torn."

"Look, whatever you do, know that I support you no matter what and I'm always going to be here for you. But please do this right, no matter what that is. You can't have both of them."

"Yeah I know, I hear you." Joon nods.

"You're selfish, you know that?" Joon laughs. "You couldn't even introduce her to your single friends?" Jin smiled.

"Nope. Finders keepers." Joon rose his middle finger. "Just do me a favor and keep your mouth shut until I tell Yoongi and Hoseok myself."

"Sure, whatever. Not my battle anyways." He stood up and stretched. "So, where are we taking your little Jungkookie tonight?"

"The club so he can get some for his birthday."

"What a good older brother." Jin laughed.

"Is Grace in New York already?"

"Yep. I'm probably just going to head home and sleep until then. I don't remember the last time I stayed up this late, let alone the last time I went to a club."

"Yeah go home, and not to Y/N's house."

"Should I?" Jin joked, but Namjoon rolled his eyes. "I'm kidding, don't worry. Everything didn't just go in one ear and out the other."

"Yeah, please reassure me and tell me that I didn't waste time giving you advice."

"Oh my god, hurry up!" Jimin groaned loudly as he laid sloppily on your couch, getting restless while waiting for you, Ryujin and Taehyung to finish getting ready. To be fair, you all had been getting ready and fooling around for 2 hours, while Jimin sat patiently and watched whatever was on TV.

"Shut up, Jimin! I'm going to make sure I look good tonight." Ryujin yelled back.

"For who?"

"The dick I'll be getting."

"Why did I even ask?" Jimin sighed and dug his head into a pillow while you and Ryujin continued to yell and sing along loudly to every song that came through on your bluetooth speakers. "You all look good already, please, what else do you need to do?" He mumbled into the pillow. Don't get him wrong, he loves you all to death. He truly does. But it's just been such a long time since you all have gone out like this. He forgot what it was like.

"You know, she really means me." Taehyung tugged on his collar and swiped his thumb across his bottom lip.

"Okay, honestly. You two should probably fuck already. Get it out of your systems, you know?" You say as you dab lip gloss on your lips before shrugging and rolling your eyes. "Jesus Christ."

"Okay, no. You're supposed to be on my side, and that doesn't help." Ryujin's cheeks flush to a rosy tint as she pulls you aside. You knew damn well she was feeling embarrassed because it was true. She wanted to. Once Ryujin finally dusted herself off and was satisfied with her outfit, you both walked out into the living room to meet Jimin and Taehyung. Their eyes widened as they caught sight of you two, Ryujin in a pink, ruched dress with matching pink heels and you in a matching 2-piece skirt and low cut crop top.

"Oh shit, you both look good as hell." Taehyung says as he gets up and continues to eye both of you up and down. Mostly Ryujin, though. "Shall we head out?"

"Yup!" You say as you come to Jimin's side and lead the way out of your apartment. Jimin decided he'd drive tonight since he didn't feel like drinking too much, but he still wanted to go out and have fun. The crew headed to grab dinner at the Farmhouse Kitchen, which served the best Thai food in town. You all enjoyed some good grub, along with some really strong cocktails. You felt super happy that you all had time to finally do this since it's been a minute. You felt like you could finally let lose and get your mind off of things. The things that your dearest bestfriends don't even know about.

But, stories for other days. Tonight, you felt good and you looked good. You were all that and then some. Maybe tonight was the night you could meet a single, fine ass man to dance up on and act up with.

The cocktails were hitting you and Ryujin the most, already feeling tipsy before heading into the club.

"Wooooo!" Ryujin yelled before laughing out loud. "I'm ready!"

"Okay, yes, same, but please keep it together so we can at least make it inside the club." Jimin pleaded. He led your crew up to security, flashing your IDs one by one and paying for the cover fee before stepping in to the already packed nightclub. You and your friends ended up walking in a straight line, holding each other's hands to navigate through the crowd to the bottom floor. The top floor was the most crowded, being it was the house / EDM floor, while the bottom Hip Hop floor wasn't too jammed packed.

"Shots, my friends?" Taehyung asks as he swings over to the front of the bar. You follow behind him and line up against the bartender, asking for some good ol' Don Julio tequila. It wasn't your fave, but it was definitely Taehyung's go-to, and you can't lie, it got the job done quick for you. You all stick around the bar to take your shots, kicking them back to back [besides Jimin] to really get this night started.

As you waited for the final around, Taehyung is scanning the room and notices a group loudly making their way from down the steps and over to the bar. They were cheering on whoever the birthday boy was. A face in the group had looked familiar, so Taehyung squints his eyes to get a better look, and realizes its no other than Jin with his friends.

"Oh, shit! Look! Mr. Kim's here!" Taehyung laughs and says loudly, pointing towards the other end of the bar.

"Is he really?! Let's go take a shot with him and his friends!" Ryujin squeals as she sees him come into full view. You too, get a glimpse of him as they approach the bar and suddenly, you felt hot and nervous - the alcohol being of no help during this time. He looked good, and he didn't look like the already-handsome-professor you had. His hair was more natural, slightly curly, and almost like he had showered and let it messily air dry. The look was perfect on him. Not gonna lie, you were somewhat happy he was here to see how good you looked and part of you really wanted him to crave you until he couldn't take it anymore. You wanted to drive him crazy, and little did you know that you already were. It was a game you didn't mind playing, especially since you knew you couldn't have him.

You shouldn't.

"Ayeeeee! Mr. Kim!" Taehyung's ass yells with Ryujin cheering in the back. He does nothing but flash that smile of his while chuckling. His friends are all really handsome as well, one especially caught your eye with the way his wavy black hair fell down his eyes as he stood against the bar in black ripped jeans and a button up shirt. He seemed to be the youngest out of the group, but you were just assuming.

"Let's take a shot! On me!" Ryujin yells as she runs over with her loud ass. You follow behind her with Taehyung and Jimin, slightly hiding behind Jimin since you were feeling a little shy and awkward at this encounter. The events of the past days just flashed before your eyes, and you can feel Jin's eyes burning holes through you from your peripherals.

"These are your students?" You overhear as one of them looks behind at Jin and laughs.

"Yup." Is all he says, hands deep into his pockets.

"That's her isn't it?" Namjoon says in his ear, loud enough to make sure its clear over the music blasting. Jin simply looks at him without saying a word before returning his attention back on Jungkook, who he noticed was eyeing you. The look said everything to Namjoon.

"Do you know her?" Jungkook points at you and Jin nods.

"Why?"

"Why? She's gorgeous." His eyes light up, causing Namjoon to slightly choke and laugh behind Jin.

"Go for it." Is all Jin says. He's honestly livid right now, because the thought of someone else being able to get a taste of you while he hasn't fucks him up.

"Ohhh, boy." Namjoon sighs. "I hope you're truly over her or else it's going to get really fucked up, you know that right?"

"Don't worry about it." He says, dismissing him as he takes the shot from Yoongi's hand and immediately downs it.

"Hey." The black-haired cutie that caught your eye pushed his way through the group to come into full view. "I'm Jungkook."

"Y/N." You lightly shake his hand before tucking a strand behind your ear.

"I just wanted to say that you're absolutely gorgeous." He says cutely, his hands tucked into his pockets.

"Aw, thank you. That's so sweet."

"I, uh—"

"It's his 23rd birthday today!" One of the guys against the bar yells, grabbing Jungkook's shoulders and playfully massaging it.

"Yeah, it's his birthday Y/N! Give the boy some love!" Ryujin winked from where she was at.

"Happy Birthday." You chuckled as he nods.

"Thanks. Maybeeeee you can bless me with a dance after this shot?" He asked shyly. Boy, was he fucking attractive. You could see his thighs poking through the rips of his jeans, his sharp collarbone poking out from the unbuttoned portion of his shirt and his arm muscles defined even in the dark.

"Yeah, I'd love to." You leaned back against the bar as he stood next to you, waiting for the round of shots to come. "Are these your friends?" He chuckled.

"More like big brothers? That's Yoongi, that's Hoseok and that's Namjoon. They're Jin's friends. Jin is my stepbrother." You swallowed the lump in your throat as you quickly glance at Jin, who's side-eyeing you as he leans against the bar. You have got to be fucking kidding me. God was truly testing you.

"Ohhhh." You respond. "That's sweet of them to take you out."

"I honestly didn't wanna do much, let alone come to the club. It's not really my thing, but I'm glad I did or else I wouldn't have met you." He smiled, his smile being just as perfect as his stepbrother's.

"I'm glad I could make your birthday a good one after all." Ryujin suddenly comes to your side and gives your arm a good squeeze.

"He's a cutie! You better hop on that since Mr.Kim is taken." She says in your ear, pulling you into a hug.

"That's his stepbrother."

"Even better!" She exclaims, making you shake your head. You all gather and take the last round of shots in honor of Jungkook's birthday and shit gets wild, quick. Your group led them to the dance floor, partying together like you had known them since forever. It didn't feel awkward at all knowing it was Jin and group of friends, but it did get awkward when you felt the tension with Jin every time you were near him. He didn't like seeing you dance all up on his stepbrother, getting all handsy and touchy-feely when just the other night, you were straddling his lap, ready to risk it all.

Hell, what was he gonna do though? He couldn't do shit. Not with his people around, especially Namjoon.

You knew this. He didn't have to say anything for you to know he wasn't a fan of it. You'd catch him looking at you throughout the night, his eyes hungry and almost dark. Let's get this straight - there's no bad blood here. You're not mad or bitter [slightly]. You're just having your fun because you're single and can do whatever the fuck you want. You know he wants you, what's wrong with a little tease?

A couple of songs have passed and Ryujin has made her way through Taehyung, Yoongi and Namjoon, and now she was back to doing her own thing on the dance floor. Jimin has had a couple of ladies welcome themselves onto his lap, and he gladly accepted. You loved seeing Jimin have fun and you especially loved when girls swooned at the sight of him because he was deserving of it and he was mighty good looking. He always worked hard and never gave himself a break.

You, on the other hand, had been stuck to the hip with Jungkook and you had brought him deeper into the dance floor, away from the group just to get a little alone time. You had danced up on him majority of the night, his muscular arms always gently bringing you back against his body. You both were feeling some type of way with the alcohol running through your veins, but you weren't complaining one bit. Alcohol or not, Jungkook was fine.

"So, are you going to let me take you out on a date?" Jungkook asks in your ear, causing you to bite onto your bottom lip.

"I'd love to go out on a date with you." You face him, his smile going from ear to ear as he nods and starts taking down your number. To be honest, you could be here all night with him, but you decided you needed a break from all this dancing and from the crowded dance floor. You quickly excuse yourself to the bathroom, suddenly needing to break the seal really badly and freshen up. As you were exiting the bathroom, Jin was also exiting the men's bathroom at the same time. You both locked eyes, with you breaking the contact with a small, toothless smile before walking off.

"Y/N." He says, gently grabbing your wrist and pulling you back towards him. His body is against the back wall, both of your groups distant and not as visible from where you're standing. He looks down at you, his hand still wrapped around your wrist.

"Jin."

"You haven't said one word to me all night."

"I'm trying to keep my distance from you, remember?"

"You know that's not necessary." His hand was now on the small of your back, fingers gently caressing your back in small circles.

"It is. You know what you do to me." You say as you look down at his lips. Truthfully.

"And so do you." You can feel his breath against your skin and it sends goosebumps down your entire body. You're trying your hardest right now to not get turned on by this man, let alone throw yourself onto him. "This isn't fair, you know?"

"I gotta get back to everyone." You say, slightly pulling back.

"Just for the record," He gently pulls you back, his other hand lifting your chin. "Jungkook might have you right now, but I know in the end you'll be coming home to me and that's all that matters." He lets go of your wrist and walks away, leaving you slightly dumbfounded at the way he stood his ground like that. Your panties felt soaked, and you wanted nothing more but to ride this man into the next dimension. He was truly testing you, and quite frankly, you could burst any minute now.

"You okay?" Jimin says, lightly squeezing your arm. "You were gone for awhile."

"Yeah, long line." You lied.

"We're thinking about heading out, you good with that?" You nod silently. You look around to see Ryujin flirting with Yoongi and Namjoon, making you shoot him a look. "Not me, all you. Go get her." He shakes his head, chuckling.

"Alright, I need to say bye to Jungkook anyways."

"Oooh, Jungkook." He wiggles his eyebrows. You make your way over to the area that Jin and his friends are occupying, prying Ryujin's drunk ass away. You give Jungkook a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek, letting him know you'd be waiting for his text.

Finally, you all headed out of the club and into Jimin's car, Ryujin being the first drop off of the night. Thank God he had decided to drive, because all three of you were still pretty tipsy and in no condition to get behind the wheel.

"Y/N, listen to me. You need to hop on Jungkook because he's fine as fuck!" Ryujin's drunk ass yells in the backseat as Jimin is making his way to her house.

"Ouch, Ry, stop kicking my chair." Jimin whines.

"Y/N, did you hear me?"

"I hear you loud and clear, Ry. Thank you." You laugh.

"And you, Jimin! I hope you grabbed a ton of numbers because there were tons of pretty ladies feeling you tonight and you need a girl!"

"Perfect, thank you for pointing out how single I am." He says, making Taehyung snorts.

"What about me?"

"Shut up, Tae. You don't need shit. Mind your own business." You and Jimin laugh in your seats.

"Also, Mr. Kim was really eyeing the hell out of you tonight, Y/N." She adds, making you sigh silently to yourself.

"Actually, I concur." Jimin chimes in. "He couldn't keep his eyes off of you."

"Mistress Y/N." Taehyung calls out, causing you to turn and pinch him on the leg. If you haven't gotten it by now, Tae loves to tease the fuck out of you by calling you a mistress. It's been his thing since you got all googly-eyed for him. And you hated it. You truly wanted to fight him every single time.

"It was nothing. He was probably just drunk."

"Sure." Jimin responds. "Call it what you want, he was definitely feeling you tonight." The ride goes silent, which, you're happy that none of them are pressing on it. You were not trying to get caught up at this moment.

Ryujin gets dropped off before Jimin makes his way to your apartment, parking in the yellow passenger/loading zone. Taehyung is knocked out in the back seat, while Jimin throws his hazards on and walks you to the front door of the lobby.

"Thanks for driving, Chim." He smiles and pulls you into a hug.

"No prob. Call me if you need me?" You nod. You walk in and get into the elevator, Jimin and his car disappearing in sight. You take a deep breath and sigh because you had been having an internal battle since the moment you stepped out of the club.

You were losing.

You stepped out of the elevator, only to step into your apartment to quickly freshen up and throw on comfier clothes. You find yourself heading back downstairs to meet your Uber. You knew exactly where you were going and you knew exactly what you were doing.

But you didn't give a fuck. You had been dying to get your needs fulfilled and the only person you wanted was a quick 25 minute Uber trip away.

[7wanderingpaws]

Mess We Made - fourth/last (m)

(gif not mine)

Pairing: Baekhyun x reader

Genre: arranged marriage au (not bbh), doctor AU, angst, fluff

Words: 7.5K

WARNINGS: language, mentions of blood, mature content, cheating (not bbh)

Quick A/N: Hiii! Im gonna hide... Ive never written sth like this omg. (pls let me know your thoughts). This is the final part so I feel accomplished I wrote such long chapters in such a short time >< 

tags: @byunfirstlady @blackon @puppyeoliepop @in3vitably3v3​ @mangobaek @bobohumyonlyboo @wooya1224 @exortedgoods @gureuma (if you want to be tagged/untagged please reply to this post)

parts: first – second – third -- fourth (last)

masterlist

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Mess We Made, last part

“What the hell did you think you were doing in the hospital?” you attacked him as soon as you arrived home after two days.

Frankly Minheob didn’t come to visit you anymore although you overheard some nurses gossiping that he went several times to the doctor’s office and had a chat with doctor Kim. As much as you wished to know why he would go the great lengths to try to tie you down, you also couldn’t care less as long as he didn’t come and see you.

Minheob frowned at you as he watched you cradle Hayeon. “Do you think I don’t know?”

“Don’t know what?”

He stepped closer to you and you wanted to move backwards but the baby’s crib was behind you, successfully caging you in. He grinned nastily. “Well, you really are so clueless. As soon as I found out your lover is also in that hospital, I rushed in to get you. You doing miscarriage and daring to cheat on me at the same time?” He scoffed. “That is unheard of.”

Your heart rate sped up at his words. There was no way you cheated on him. Baekhyun did come several times to check up on you, sometimes you even swore he was there while you were sleeping and felt something soft brushing your cheek, but you never did anything more than what a doctor and a patient would do. Did Minheob know about Baekhyun? If he did then how did he find out?

Minheob laughed out loud at your shocked expression, and reached out to caress Hayeon’s hair but you moved her away from his touch. “She is my daughter too, you know.”

“How dare you accuse me of cheating on you,” you muttered sternly, trying to keep your voice down so as not to trigger the baby.

“Well, then let me put you into perspective because the past year you’ve been amazingly oblivious.” He made a dramatic pause and you almost lost all your wits. He took a deep breath and like a snake, licked his lips in mischief. “How many times have you moaned his name when you were coming, huh?” he whispered, carefully watching you from up close. “How many times have you thought it was him instead of me? You were so full of him while in bed with me... What made you ever think I wouldn’t find out that you still kept in touch with him?”

Blood drained from your face and you knew you were done for. And Baekhyun too. Your stupid mistake would bring him into this huge mess that you created again.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you dared to lie through gritted teeth and hugged your baby even tighter. “Nor do I care what your twisted mind came up with, Minheob.”

He laughed, stepping away from you. “So this is the way you want to act? I will gladly moan out his name for you, maybe then you would remember?” he asked with a low tone.

You started walking towards the kitchen, deciding to mix the baby formula so that Hayeon could eat. You were not breastfeeding her, you only did so for two weeks before you gave up. Your breasts took too long to bring out the milk and even if they did, it was bloody. Another reason to be miserable. You couldn’t even feed your child.

“Stop pretending you didn’t hear me,” snickered your husband and grabbed your wrist, yanking you back to him.

You gasped, holding Hayeon tighter. “I didn’t cheat on you!”

“I don’t give a fuck whether you did or not! You just stayed in hospital for two days for nothing because he wanted you there!”

When you opened your mouth to retort something, he muttered: “Baekhyun wanted to keep you there for himself, didn’t he? Good way to make use of you,” he snarled. “A woman that lost her child. He could still fuck you over-“

Your hand flew out before you could think twice, landing a stinking slap on Minheob’s face. “Get him out of your filthy mouth,” you muttered lowly, sending him death glares. Minheob was shocked just for a moment before he was about to rebuke, but you beat him to it: “Baekhyun has nothing to do with me. Stop blaming innocent people-“

“I cannot believe you had me fooled! I had his best friend stalked to make sure he wouldn’t make moves on you, the Park Chanyeol kid, and then it was the fucking doctor the whole time!” he shouted but you didn’t flinch, only proudly noted how his cheek was becoming redder with each passing second.

“I never fooled you,” you answered, “it’s you who does the dirty job. Leave Baekhyun alone.”

“I can see how angry you are becoming. Protecting your secret lover.”

“He is not my secret lover.”

“I can see the way you are looking at me right now. You hate even the idea of me saying his name, don’t you? You hate your entire family for making you marry me when you could have him-“

“Enough.”

“But you’re stuck with me and he will most probably find another woman-“

“I said enough!” you screamed loudly, successfully making Hayeon cry in your arms while your husband had a victorious smile on his face. He paused for a moment and pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans. Turning away from you, he said: “Good luck taking care of that weeping machine. It’s annoying. I’ll be out.”

When you heard the door slam, you felt your cheeks burning up with anger while the tears you didn’t know you were keeping in, spilled. Quickly shushing Hayeon, you went over to grab the formula as you originally wanted to, while sniffing.

“C‘mon, Hayeon, don’t cry,” you tried gently but she was relentless.

You didn’t want her to be scarred by the toxic relationship you had with her father. Everyday you tried your best to be good for her and make her happy so that she would grow up well. But having Minheob breathing down your neck was making it hard.

It was almost one hour later, Hayeon still slowly sucking on the milk from her bottle while you had the big TV turned on with a comedy show when the doorbell rang.

Sighing tiredly, you walked over to the intercom to check the camera, and your heartbeat sped up when you noticed Baekhyun’s profile as he was waiting for you to let him in.

What the hell was he doing here? He shouldn’t be here!

Despite your racing thoughts, you let him in and walked over to the doors with Hayeon in your arms. She was tapping on your chest with her small hands as she was looking at you with huge eyes.

You were cooing to her softly, hoping it would ease your nerves. And it did. You didn’t hear Baekhyun approaching, only realizing his presence when he was two meters from you, casually leaning his shoulder against the wall, his arms pushed in his dark-blue jeans, and observing you with a warm, gentle smile. It made your heart skip a beat.

“Baekhyun,” you breathed and he lazily stretched his lips before walking over to you, standing a tad too close as he was looking down at your daughter.

“Being a mother really suits you,” he murmured softly, looking up to catch you staring.

Quickly recovering, you blurted: “You shouldn’t be here, Baek. I’m not sure when my husband will be back-“

“He won’t be coming for a while, don’t worry,” he replied calmly.

You frowned. “Did he go after you?” Just the idea made you dizzy with worry.

Baekhyun chuckled, taking in your expression. “No, but he is with doctor Kim.”

You frowned.

“Won’t you let me in?”

“Ah, right,” you stammered and moved aside, letting him in. You weren’t sure you wanted him to see the place you’d been living in with another man that wasn’t him. Baekhyun looked out of place as you followed him to the spacious living room. “Please, sit down. What can I get you?”

He did as you asked and looked at you with expectant eyes. He smiled sheepishly. “This is probably too much but… do you maybe have wine?”

“I do but… aren’t you driving?”

“My brother will come and pick me up. He is nearby doing some business.”

You nodded. “I’ll have a glass with you, too. Just let me put her-“

“I can hold her,” he offered smoothly which made you stop. “Only if you don’t mind. I’ve held quite a few babies,” he grinned proudly.

Smiling, you gladly handed him Hayeon and gave him her little bottle. You realized you were too close because when you glanced up, Baekhyun’s nose almost brushed yours. Pulling away, you turned to go when he asked: “Aren’t you breastfeeding? You shouldn’t drink.”

Preparing two wine glasses, you told him you weren’t. He was silent and when you came out with the glasses and two kinds of bottles he looked up at you holding the options up for him.

“Red,” he said with a smile.

You nodded and poured the both of you a glass and faced him. Humming, you noted: “Being with a baby suits you.”

He smiled knowingly. “Oh, yeah? Well… this one looks a lot like you, to be honest.” He gave a loving caress to Hayeon’s head and you felt your heart squeezing painfully.

“Luckily.” You cleared your throat. “What brings you here?”

Baekhyun cooed at Hayeon a little bit longer before he murmured, catching your eyes. “I was worried… he would do something to you.”

“But you never cared before.”

“That’s not true and you know it.”

You bit your lip. “Why is he with doctor Kim again?”

Baekhyun pressed his lips for a moment, thinking over your question. “He is…” he let out a perplexed laugh, as if unsure what to say, “I don’t know how to put it in words.”

Baekhyun earned your full attention now. “What do you mean?”

“He is in love with doctor Kim.”

Your mouth fell open, the news catching you off guard. “H-he what?”

“Shh,” he shushed gently like he always did with you, and nodded towards Hayeon who was drifting off to sleep in his arms. Your heart squeezed painfully once again, the sight was bittersweet. Your child in his arms. “I found out today too. He had been visiting her for a long time. Turns out they have known each other since high school.”

That sounded awfully familiar. “And now he is trying to get her?”

Baekhyun shrugged once and looked down at Hayeon, her eyes peacefully closed but still diligently sucking on the last droplets of milk. “Maybe?”

“And here I thought he went there to stalk me.”

He turned his head towards you. “Does it matter whether he actually wants doctor Kim?” he asked quietly, the unvoiced actual question palpable in his voice. Do you love your husband enough to be hurt that he wants another woman?

“I feel sorry for her,” was your blunt answer. “But if that means he will change I wish he would ditch me.” You looked Baekhyun in the eyes. “I’ve been wanting this whole nightmare to end for two years, Baekhyun. Two years of being completely helpless, not even able to see you properly. I want him to ditch me and I want to be with you.”

He was listening to you carefully, his eyes sometimes drifting to your lips and the way they shaped when you pronounced some words. “If I told you I have someone else…”

Within seconds your eyes burned up in despair. “No, you don’t.”

Without an answer, he was looking at you; observing the way your cheeks became red along with your nose while your eyes were full of unshed tears. You were so beautiful even after miscarriage. You were ethereal in his eyes even though he just made you cry. Now that Baekhyun thought about it, he didn't remember the last time he saw a genuine smile on your face; it was always either a tired, insincere smile or crying. If he only saw you like that, how many times must have you cried when he wasn't there?

“Please don’t tell me you have someone else,” you whispered when he wouldn't answer.

“It's only natural I would find someone else,” he reasoned matter-of-factly but in a gentle tone so as not to upset you.

“And you came here to tell me this?”

Baekhyun was helpless. He knew your jealousy could be blinding, but he thought with time it would simmer down. “I didn't come here to talk about my private life-”

You snorted sarcastically. “Right. Your private life is how we call it now?” You reached out for sleeping Hayeon and took her into your arms. Without a word you walked to the bedroom. In case you would become even more emotional, you didn't want her to wake. You heard Baekhyun shuffling after you, a conflicting gaze following your every more.

He waited by the door, silently watching you putting Hayeon into her crib. With teary eyes, you observed your daughter a little longer, thinking how wrong everything was at that moment before facing your guest.

Baekhyun didn't move when you closed the door behind you, instead he took hold of your wrist to make you look at him. “I'm sorry. It all came out so wrong.”

“You have nothing to apologize for,” you said evenly. “It's your private life and it's none of my business. Which means you may go. Now that you made sure I wasn't dying on the bedroom floor - because you really care about my well-being - it's time to leave.”

Baekyhun was slowly losing his patience. “Stop acting so freaking stubborn.”

More tears welled up in your eyes. “You are right. So leave. I want to be alone.”

He sighed when you tried to push his hand away. “Sweethea-” he stopped himself, biting quickly into his lower lip. Your heartbeat sped up but then he murmured your name softly and you deflated again. “I didn't mean I'm in a relationship.”

“Then what did you mean?” you pressed.

“I was with other women while I wasn't with you. That's all,” he replied truthfully. “I haven't been in a relationship ever since you left me.”

“But you slept with other women,” you finished.

He nodded, staring into your eyes with pure honesty. He had his heart on his sleeve for you, and you still couldn't help the boiling feelings of betrayal. Maybe it was because you were still recovering from the happenings of the past three days or maybe it was just the way you would always feel when Baekhyun was with another woman, be it romantically or purely physically.

“I still don't get why you are telling me this. I still don't understand why you had to come here now, out of all the times.”

“I want you back,” he whispered. “Even though it is impossible, I want you back. With everything you are.” Your breath hitched in your throat and your heart restarted its wild beating. “It's so fucking difficult to keep my hands off of you, to not touch you, to not be there for you when I know you don't have anyone else to turn to and share your burdens with. I know your asshole of a husband mistreats you with your entire family helping him out. I'm tired of it and if it means going against all the rules, then so be it.”

Hope was making your eyes come alive, he could see it. Even though they were teary, hope sparked through and Baekhyun felt relieved.

“Are you doing this now because you know Minheob has feelings for another woman?”

He was shocked. “W-what? No, it isn't about it-”

“Yes, you are,” you said, not even listening to him, “you wouldn't have come here if my husband wouldn't be seeing doctor Kim right now. Otherwise-”

“No, wait, listen to me-”

“You wouldn't fight for me if it weren't for-”

He murmured your name in warning. “Listen-”

“I can't believe you-”

“For Christ's sake just listen-”

“Make me.”

Baekhyun was furious. Both of you were staring down each other, both of you hurt and desperate. “Make me listen, Baekhyun,” you said again with a steely voice and he grabbed your face and crashed his lips on yours. You let out a moan, his lips so soft against yours despite the kiss being anything but soft. He cradled your face and you didn't waste time in bringing your arms around his neck, bringing him closer. You heard Baekhyun inhale sharply as he sucked on your lower lip before licking it, asking for entrance. He growled when you complied but would fight him for dominance. It was a game of push and pull and he pressed you against the wall next to the bedroom door; the room which you shared with someone that wasn't Baekhyun.

It was thrilling, exciting and you wanted more. Baekhyun tasted much sweeter than you could remember and there wasn't a chance that you'd get enough. When it came to him, it was never enough for you. Thirstily, you pressed your middle to his, causing him to grunt while he sucked on your tongue, his hands on your neck to angle your face for him. You could feel your lips were already swollen but you didn't care. Your hands were buried in his hair, messing it up, pulling on it as you wanted more. More, more, more. You wanted him to devour you, to take you and to never return you.

But it was still Baekhyun. This was unfair to him. And so he was the first one to disattach, pulling away from you slightly to press his forehead against yours while the both of you were panting. You looked at his lips, the way the skin around them was turning a gentle pink, his lips particularly red. God, you loved those lips and how cutely they were shaped.

He caressed your jaw with his thumb, bringing your attention up to his droopy eyes. “I love you,” he confessed.

Your throat went dry for a second. It was like reliving all your happy memories with him all over again. “I love you, too, Baekhyun,” you replied, making sure you were staring into his eyes.

A soft smile spread on his face and he leaned in to kiss you again but stopped just before his lower lip could touch your upper one. “We shouldn't do this, though. You are married, have a baby and it's not right.”

“You already kissed me,” you urged him, not sparing even a heartbeat to think about his words, “it won't make a difference if you do it one more time.” You raised yourself on your tiptoes and kissed him before he could retaliate. He moaned so subtly it almost made your knees buckle. His hands travelled souther, caressing your shoulders before they went to your back where he drew sensual circles, making you feel all sorts of inappropriate things. You dared to bring your hands to the hem of his shirt that was tucked into his jeans and pull it out, wanting to feel his skin under. He let out another moan when he felt your fingertips trailing the outline of his abs- wait, abs?

You pulled away. “Since when are you so ripped?” you breathed which made him chuckle. You lifted his shirt slightly to see that he had a freaking six-pack. Your mouth went agape, but you still felt Baekhyun's hand on the sliver of skin that showed between your jeans and shirt. He didn't dare to go further than that, though.

“Where else can I use my frustrations if not in the gym, hm,” he murmured in a low voice that made your insides squeeze with want.

You rested your head against the wall, looking at him with content. “I caused it all. I'm sorry.”

He sighed and stepped closer, one leg between yours as he cradled your cheek. “I knew from the start it would go like this, you know. Don't apologize.”

“I'm still sorry 'cause I never should have made you go through the things that me and my terrible family did.” You paused for a moment. “Let's start over, together,” you suggested eagerly. “Let's run away.”

Baekhyun took a deep breath. “You know that isn't possible, love.”

“It is,” you insisted, “of course it is. Let's just disappear and not let anyone know.”

“I have to make a living. And I love my job. You need to take care of your daughter as well.”

“So is that a no? Even if I get a divorce and a chance to start over… is that a no?” you asked quietly.

“Look, doctor Kim knows about us. She knows about our relationship because I couldn't focus whenever I knew you were in the clinic. My behavior gave me away and she is a great senior that understood me well. She was the one to tell me to come here and she called your husband over. I'm sure she is lecturing him.”

“What?”

“Yeah,” he nodded, running his thumb over the naked skin of your hip. “I'm sure with time, we can slowly start over again, hm?” he prompted gently, tapping your skin a few times. “Time is all we need.”

“I have to wait more to have you?” You were being greedy. You knew you were. But you couldn't help yourself.

“We waited a long time for each other,” he breathed, “we can wait a little longer. Doctor Kim will help us.”

“Then kiss me one last time. To seal it,” you demanded. “As a promise that you will come back to me, Baekhyun.”

And Baekhyun did.

///

It had been weeks now that you found out about Minheob having feelings for the kind doctor Kim. You weren't sure if it was because you were aware of it, but Minheob seemed to become less interested in you overall. He didn't call you when you were busy with the shop, he didn't care if you came home a little later, and not once mentioned Baekhyun to you anymore. It was almost as if that argument never happened.

Even though that seemed to get better, you were still sour because Baekhyun kept the contact between you two quite limited even though he said he wanted you. Sometimes you would exchange texts, because you couldn't keep still; your need to know what he was doing, how he was doing and where he was, was stronger.

It could have been frustrating and maybe now you got a taste of how he must have been feeling the entire time after your break-up. You expecting him to be alone and wait for something to happen was so greedy it made you feel embarrassed. Of course he would have found a woman for pleasure.

You weren't disappointed; hurt maybe because you despised any idea of him being with another woman. After all, you wanted to be the only one to know how he was like in bed, how he would treat a woman after the love-making was done.

You groaned gently, the intruding thoughts not doing you any good. Plus, you were on your period. Maybe you shouldn't have thought about it too much. He confirmed he still loved you and that was all that mattered.

It was almost four months later, your relationship and communication with Minheob almost non-existent and Hayeon a curious toddler, when Minheob said a sentence you never thought you would hear:

“I want a divorce.”

You swiveled around from where you were sitting on the carpeted floor, watching over Hayeon while your tablet was sitting in your lap, going through the new lingerie sets that were supposed to arrive anytime soon. With it, finally, the “unlock, bbh” one as well.

“What?”

“You heard me,” he sighed, sitting on the sofa, emotionlessly looking at an ever-bright Hayeon. “I want to divorce you.”

You were silent, carefully thinking over what to reply next. Maybe you didn't seem as shocked to him as he would have expected you to, but he didn't care at that point.

“I am with another woman. And I want to become a better person for her.”

“I see…”

He rolled his eyes. “At least pretend like you're shocked.” “I am, Minheob. You never told me you are seeing someone else.”

“Just like you never told me you are cheating on me with that doctor of yours.”

“I never-” you started, offended, but all too quickly you remembered kissing Baekhyun in that very house. Minheob couldn't have known about that, though. “I didn't cheat on you. Not like that.”

He let out a dishonest laugh and looked away. “Either way, it doesn't matter anymore. I want it to be as soon as possible.”

“What about Hayeon? She is your daughter.” Minheob didn't care about Hayeon, you knew it. He barely ever tried to initiate anything with her, let alone ask if the baby was doing well.

“Yeah,” he rolled his eyes, “you couldn't even give me a boy. It had to be a daughter.”

You puckered your lips, trying hard not to pick a fight. “I'm sick and tired of you being a misogynistic prick,” you told him in a calm voice. “She is a healthy child and you should be fucking thankful.” You turned to look at Hayeon who was playing with huge baby-safe lego pieces. “I will raise her to become much more badass than any man ever will.”

“Sure, you will.” He was silent for a while. “I will try better. I will take care of my part on her behalf, of course. And the matter with your family - they are all to stay just as usual.”

Not turning to look at him, you hummed. “Good way to become a better person, Minheob.”

“I'll deal with all the paperwork. Let's get everything settled by next week. Since we both agree on divorce.”

Sudden eagerness ignited your hope to be with Baekhyun much earlier than you anticipated. Just the idea of it made you feel elevated.

“And about this house…”

You turned your head to look at your soon-to-be ex-husband. “I will leave with Hayeon, don't worry.”

“Good.”

“Good.”

///

You headed to Baekhyun's that evening. Packing up the baby bag for Hayeon, you put her in the baby carrier basket once you arrived. You knew his new address but not once you visited. Having Minheob as a husband had its perks after all; you could easily look into the employees' personal records.

Baekhyun lived in an upscale apartment building, typical for families that had money. It made you realize just how much he developed professionally.

Shushing Hayeon, you waited for Baekhyun to open the door and when he did, he still looked surprised, even after letting you in through the intercom. “Hi,” you smiled, “I came to talk.”

Baekhyun took you in, noting the sleeping toddler. “Sure, come in,” he said quietly, not wanting to disturb the sleeping child.

“Sorry for coming unannounced,” you muttered sheepishly, admiring the way he looked in simple grey joggers and a white shirt. 

Baekhyun stopped you from going further into his apartment. “Are you okay? Did something happen?”

“No,” you smiled softly, “I have some good news.”

Sitting close to each other, you talked for about two hours; about your future. About the current situation and about the way it all evolved. Baekhyun was surprised but you were relieved when you saw his eyes light up with the same hope that it did with yours. For amoment you were worried he wouldn't reciprocate the excitement but when he almost ducked to kiss you, you knew he still felt the same.

Your faces were so close, you could feel his breath on your cheek. “I was thinking about looking for an apartment…” you trailed off. “Maybe somewhere close to yours?”

“Silly,” sighed Baekhyun affectionately, “you'll come straight to my place.”

Your heart skipped a beat as you eyed his lips. “Are you sure? I will have Hayeon with me,” you admitted, not wanting to sound as sad as you actually felt. It made you sound like a bad mother and maybe just a little bit, you were. Hayeon was such a delight of a child, but she was Minheob's. Baekhyun didn't have anything to do with her and even though you loved her, it also made you mad that you didn't have a child with Baekhyun.

“You know I never had anything against Hayeon. She is innocent and too young. She is barely one, sweetheart. She is your child, how can I not love her?”

Baekhyun's words made your eyes snap up to meet his tender ones.

Slowly he lifted his hand, cradling your cheek. “She looks a lot like you, you know?”

You closed your eyes. “You already told me.”

“And I'm saying it again. She is gorgeous. I bet she will grow up into a beautiful lady just like her mother.”

You smiled, shaking your head gently as to not let his hand fall. “Will you help me raise her into a good and loving child?”

“Of course,” he breathed, his thumb wandering to your lower lip. “We will raise her together.”

Your smile grew wider, now opening your eyes. “I love you so much, Baekhyun. You really have no idea how perfect you are, do you?”

He smiled and leaned in, nudging your nose with his. “I would do anything just to see you smile like that again. I want to keep that smile on your face forever, baby.”

Electricity cursed through your veins. You leaned in, wanting to finally overcome the teasing distance between your lips but Baekhyun stopped you. “Hayeon is sleeping here.”

“She will sleep for a while now. She always sleeps the best after a car ride,” you muttered, still eyeing Baekhyun's lips.

He hummed, acknowledging your words. Then he grabbed your hand gently, intertwining your hands and made you stand up. Eagerly, you followed him to his bedroom and once he closed the door, you stared at each other for a moment before the both of you leaned in at the same time. Kissing each other passionately, he walked you towards his bed and sat down, making you straddle him.

You whimpered at the feel of his wandering hands. “You don't mind kissing me now?” you asked, wanting to be sure you weren't doing something that made him feel uncomfortable.

Baekhyun was looking up at you with huge eyes full of lust and love. The raw crave in his eyes was undeniable and it turned you on. “No. I should have just stolen you a long time ago.”

You giggled but he silenced you with another mind-blowing kiss. Letting him touch you everywhere, you found yourself needing air quickly and Baekhyun moved to your cheek, jaw and neck, sucking gently on the sensitive skin. Your hands were messing up his before they found the way to his shirt, once again wanting to feel up his abs that contracted under your touch.

“I missed you so much,” groaned Baekhyun when he squeezed your backside as he licked your collarbones before biting. You hissed, but he didn’t stop.

“I missed you much more,” you breathed, closing your eyes in pleasure. “You have no idea how much.”

He hummed and grabbed the v-line of your shirt, yanking it down to show your bra. Hungrily, he attached his lips to the swell of your breast and you moaned loudly, burying your hand in his hair. “I missed these, too,” he muttered, making you chuckle.

When his other hand wandered south to your jeans, you grabbed his hand in alarm.

“B-Baekhyun, I’m on my period,” you breathed shakily, your arousal growing with each touch of his. Because of your stupid monthly issue you wouldn’t be able to enjoy Baekhyun but to your utter shock, he muttered:

“I don’t care.” With that, he hoisted you up in his arms, making you let out a silent squeal as he smiled and brought you to his private bathroom. “Unless you mind,” he added warily.

“No,” you shook your head quickly. “I crave you too much to care.”

The doors closed shut and you were pushed against them, his middle pressed to yours causing you to let out a wanton moan. He wasn’t even inside you but you felt like a bone shattering orgasm was on its way already.

“Fuck, I missed you so much,” he whispered urgently as he sucked on your neck, his other hand supporting you on your backside, and the other wandering inside your shirt.

Your hand was in his hair, grabbing on it, pushing his head into your chest needily. “Jesus, Baek, I need you. No teasing, god.”

This would be a first time for the both of you to be intimate while you were bleeding. As much as it was a little off-putting, neither of you built up the boundaries that seemed to be nonexistent in your relationship.

He grunted as he brought you to the shower stall and gently put you down on your wobbly legs. You were already taking off your shirt and jeans and he was mimicking you, desperate to finally feel each other’s skin. When the both of you were naked, Baekhyun stepped closer to you and reached behind you to turn on the shower.

The first wave had cold water which made you squeal and jump, attacking and hugging Baekhyun to yourself who caught you with a handsome laugh.

“I’ll make you all hot and bothered very soon, princess,” he murmured in your ear, his nose pressed to your hair as you felt his hand caress you over your stomach before he let it slide to your womanhood.

“Baek-“ you started quickly, sudden anxiety eating you away because you were bleeding.

“Shh, no words,” he said and brought his face back to yours, diving in to bite your lower lip. “Just our bodies talking.”

“But-“

“I said,” he pressed and just then he spread your womanhood, his middle finger teasing your lips and the sensitive bud before he quickly let it dive into your hole. Your knees buckled at the sensation and Baekhyun was fast to press you against the wall, letting the water wash away your blood and arousal from his hand.

“Fucking gorgeous,” he grumbled and pushed two fingers inside of you, humming when he watched you open your mouth in an airy moan, your eyes closed in pure ecstasy.

You were panting heavily and when you opened your eyes to look at your lover, you felt like your chest would combust with repressed emotions. You grabbed the back of his head and smashed your lips together, bringing out another pleasurable moan from Baekhyun. The vibration of his chest rang against yours, connecting two wildly beating hearts.

He scissored his fingers inside you, pumped you slowly, in and out, making sure you were well stretched out.

A whimper was what made Baekhyun pull away from the heated kiss. “Do you think you’re ready for me?” he asked in a low voice, his eyes full of affection, desire and lust.

You nodded eagerly. “Yes, yes, just get on with it.”

You reached for his member that had stood up proud in the meantime, keeping close eye contact with his owner. “Since we are doing it while I’m on my period, I can feel all of you,” you breathed as you stood on your tiptoes to kiss him again while you wrapped your hand around his shaft, spreading the pre-cum over the tip with your thumb, closely checking your partner for any reaction. “You can come inside of me.”

Baekhyun hissed and followed with a deep groan as his arm slid around your waist bringing you to him so he could rest his head in your neck. He left open-mouthed kisses lazily on your skin and he squeezed your body when you played with his balls. “Fuck!”

Without warning, he pushed your hand away. “Do you trust me?” he asked, his hands already trailing down your sides, his member pressed to your stomach.

“Always.”

“Then jump for me,” he whispered passionately and was fast to catch you, your legs around his waist and your center just on his manhood. “I will fuck your brains out.” He informed you and you could only plead for him to finally move on. And he did. With just his tip at your center had the both of you close your eyes and moan into each other’s mouths before he slowly pushed in.

“Ahh, yes,” you let out and wiggled in his grasp. Baekhyun hissed sharply biting your earlobe when he managed to slide almost all of him in. “Shit your slick.”

Both of you looked down to where you were connected to see the water wash away a chunk of blood. “Ready?” he asked gently. “Tell me immediately if somethings off.”

You smiled at him deliriously and nodded in confirmation.

Baekhyun started with a slow pace, his thrusts careful, making you feel every single inch of his member, every vein and plain. Being on your period made your womanhood extremely sensitive and aware of every single movement inside you which was the reason your forehead fell into his shoulder, a moan after moan leaving your mouth.

He took your passionate reaction as a yes to speed up, and he set a faster, stronger pace, sliding swiftly in and out of you, each fraction sending pleasurable waves through Baekhyun’s body.

“Fuck yes,” he groaned when he slammed harshly into you, aiming for your gspot, sliding you up the wet wall while you arched your back.

“Yes, Baekhyun, right there!” you screamed, the slight cramps in your lower abdomen wonderfully changing into a wave of ecstasy bringing you closer to the edge. 

“I know my woman well,” he hissed, watching your erotic face expressions with hooded eyes as he gave you another powerful thrust. “Only I know all your secret spots.”

“Yes, yes,” you gasped and leaned in, pushing your tongue into his mouth, your teeth clinking in the process as his length kept filling you up, stretching you so well he was touching your cervix. You felt another chunk of blood releasing and Baekhyun panted, your walls starting to pulse around him, telling him you were close. He quickly fumbled with his hand and brought it to your lower lips, massaging sensually with long fingers while he pounded into you, chasing now his own release as well. The buildup was almost unbearable. Just the idea of him taking you would send him to another world and the fact that he truly had you in his arms, you wrapped around him inside and outside made him release spurts and spurts of cum, his panting coming out in high-pitched moans just when you started to milk him.

You screamed loudly and Baekhyun was mouthing at your breasts hungrily, just as he always did when he was releasing. He gave your nipple a bite as he turned his thrusts into lazy hip-rollings, helping the both of you ride out your highs.

The shower was still fully on but it did little to no help to block out the sexual pants both of you were heaving out.

You locked eyes with Baekhyun’s and caught him smiling in satisfaction. “Kiss me,” he muttered and you gladly leaned in, humming when he licked his way inside, meeting your tongue for a small battle for dominance. You pressed against him, pushing his tongue aside, wanting to win but he whimpered and bit you which made you withdraw with a hiss. You separated with a loud smack. “Cheater,” you whispered in disbelief, your lips red and swollen.

“Am I now?” quirked Baekhyun, flirting, and let you down slowly, slipping out of you. He cradled your face and kissed you innocently as if to make up for the ruined kiss, enjoying the touch of your lips as the water was mixing in.

“That was fucking amazing,” you told him in bliss, hugging his neck. You brought his ear close to your mouth. “Let’s do it again.”

“Nobody said we were done, princess.” Baekhyun had a shit-eating grin when he trailed his fingers up your sides and gently groped your breasts that made you sigh in pleasure right away. Your nipples were already hard and aching but his touch made you feel like you were levitating.

“You’re so damn sensitive. Who knew sex during your period would be this much fun? You are so responsive to every single touch of mine,” he murmured sexily as he let the tip of his nose trail your cheek, darting his tongue out to lick on your skin.

You were aroused yet again and begging for him to resolve this issue.

“You aren't leaving my house tonight,” he told you as he brought his head back to look into your eyes. “I'll take care of you.”

///

2 years later

Baekhyun squeezed your hand with a huge smile as you were both sitting on the ground opposite his parents while Hayeon was running around, playing in Baekhyun's childhood room. A room that held so many memories that were dear to you.

“Sweetie, eat a little bit more,” prompted Baekhyun's mother lovingly. “You are bearing a boy. You need to make sure he comes out all sturdy and ready to face this world.”

You giggled, as you caressed your baby bump, Baekhyun joining you.

“She is quite sensitive, mum. I don't want her to throw up everything afterwards,” commented Baekhyun.

He was right. As painless as Hayeon's pregnancy was, this little boy inside of you was making you nauseous 24/7. You found it quite ironic how your family wanted you to bring a boy into the family when you were with Minheob, yet now, when you were with Baekhyun, it was a boy. It was more exciting because Baekhyun did the ultrasound and finding out the gender of your baby had its own magic when he was the doctor.

The past two years, everything was so different yet the same. Living with Baekhyun was perfect despite typical arguments. He was understanding and you were trying to be okay with his busy schedules at the clinic.

Baekhyun wanted you to settle in properly in his house along with Hayeon before you would start a family with him. Being careful in bed was not the most fun for you, as you always wanted to feel everything he could offer, but once the both of you gave each other the green, your life became much more exciting. You were eager to get pregnant with Baekhyun's child. Finally, the old, rusty dreams you had as a teenage girl could come true.

After hearing some rustling, you stood up. “I'm gonna check up on Hayeon,” you said and strolled over to Baekhyun's bedroom. “Hayeon,” you muttered, seeing her going through some old biology books. You laughed. “Out of all the things in this room, this is what caught your attention?” you asked her, and walked over.

“Mama, look!” she pointed at some drawings Baekhyun had in the corner of the page.

“Oh, what is that,” you faked excitement and then you looked properly. Decoding Baekhyun's terrible scribbles, you gasped quietly.

hottest chickkk in the entire school >< and shes mine woow

love is not as bad as guys make it out to be

because i love herrr

“The hell is this?” you murmured, not even noticing Baekhyun standing behind you.

He laughed loudly and you looked up at him in question. “Well, what do you think it is? It's about you, silly,” he said and crouched, hugging you from behind. “Many guys were crazy about you, yet I got you.”

You snorted a laugh. “Sure, half of the school envied me and the other hated me for being who I am,” you said, looking at his side profile.

“Ah, look at you talking and talking instead of kissing your gorgeous husband,” muttered Baekhyun playfully, letting his hands slide over the baby bump. In response, you kissed Baekhyun's cheek.

“No kissing daddy!” Hayeon complained.

Hearing Hayeon calling Baekhyun her father warmed your heart. “I can't kiss daddy?” She didn't respond, instead observing you and Baehyun. “Together?” you tried.

She grinned with her tiny teeth and Baekhyun laughed at her cuteness. “Come over, my little princess,” he opened his left arm, not letting go of you. Hayeon squealed, jumping straight at Baekhyun which made him grunt. Without waiting, she pressed her mouth to Baekhyun's cheek while Baekhyun turned to you with a mischievous glint. He pressed his lips to yours and you smiled widely.

“Love you three so much,” said gently Baekhyun, looking at you and Hayeon while caressing your bump.

“Love you more,” you whispered and stole another kiss before Hayeon could notice.

Even though not everything was perfect, you finally were together as you should have been since the start of the mess. With most of it being resolved, you were excited to face a brand new chapter with Baekhyun and with the family you created with him.

//

.END.

/// /// /// /// /// /// ///

A/N: Hi! If you read till now, THANK YOU SO MUCH. My first angsty-smutty story phew. I am red and I do need to take a break lol. >< I really hope you liked this story and that you are satisfied with the happy end. ^^ I am satisifed. On this blog I have rarely a bad-ending stories soooo... Yes!

Thank you, pretty please leave a comment (cc) to let me know your thoughts?

See you soon!

[agustdakasuga]

A Place Called Home | Chapter 18

Genre: Hybrid!AU, Poly!AU?, Soulmate AU, romance, fluff, humour

Pairing: OT7 x Reader

Characters: vet!reader, Arcticfox!Seokjin, Panther!Yoongi, Goldenretriever!Hoseok, Wolf!Namjoon, Calicocat!Jimin, Tiger!Taehyung, Rabbit!Jungkook

Summary: Having saved your own injured hybrid, you were determined to try and help any other hybrid that crossed your path who needed saving. But being a vet in a small hospital wasn’t enough for you. You wanted to do more, you wanted to make a difference. You wanted to give them a home.

Jungkook has a nightmare and then, he overhears some troubling news about your situation. He tells the others and the plan is to run away but can Jungkook really find it in his heart to go with them?

Chapter warning(s): Angry cursing, Jimin has an anxiety attack, Jungkook is guilty, mentions of violence. Please read at your own discretion

“Just tell me where your hybrids are, Doctor Echo.” 

“I don’t have any!” 

“(y/n)!” Jungkook gasped as he sat up. He panted, hand clutching onto his chest, feeling his heart pound. Cold sweat covered his forehead as he struggled to catch his breath. 

“Jungkook? Is everything okay?” Taehyung stirred awake. Jungkook ignored him and walked out of the room. Looking at the clock, he realised that it was only 4 in the morning. He cursed and went downstairs to the kitchen to get a cup of water. As he sat by the kitchen counter, he thought about his nightmare. 

Why would he dream about you? You were fighting someone but it was obvious you stood no chance against them.

“Don’t hurt her.” He whimpered. The man restrained you and dragged you out of the house. Jungkook could only watch helplessly. 

“Now, we’ll just wait for your hybrids to come get you.” The man smirked. 

Jungkook shook his head, gulping down the remaining cold water. It was still cold outside but the ice water woke him up. The dull ache in his heart was still there from the night he heard you gave them up. 

“What did you say?” He heard whispering from outside. 

It was Kilo. Softly, Jungkook crept to the front door, using his rabbit ears to listen. They were always better than his human ones.

“Wait, slow down, Delta.” Kilo seemed to be panicking as well. Jungkook frowned slightly. He was starting to get impatient waiting for Kilo to spit out whatever he was worried about. But no doubt, Jungkook knew it had something to do with you. 

“She was taken?... They came and grabbed her? But our lead was that they would only strike next week!” Kilo paced up and down. 

“Did she send a distress signal?... Her phone must have dropped when she tried to fight them. I can’t tell the hybrids this, they’ll definitely try and track her down.” Kilo sighed. 

“I know... They’re keeping her captive just to bait the hybrids into showing up. I’ll keep them here. You go find her.” Kilo hung up.

Jungkook immediately pulled away from the door, hearing Kilo come back in. He ran upstairs and dove under the covers, making sure not to make a sound in case Kilo suspects that someone was eavesdropping. Jungkook was conflicted. Should he just pretend that he didn’t hear anything or tell one of the older hybrids? 

You were in danger and he knew these humans wouldn’t track you down in time. As he stared at his purple dog tag necklace, he thought about you. 

“Breakfast.” Kilo announced. Jimin and Taehyung got up from bed, heading down to one of the shared bathrooms to wash up. Jungkook sat up when he was alone. 

“Jungkook, breakfast?” Jimin poked his head into the room. Jungkook looked at him. He didn’t reply but just brush pass the calico cat. 

"Kilo, we need to talk. Alone.” Jungkook saw Yoongi grab their agent caretaker and bring him out the front door. Jungkook just stared at the front door where they disappeared. Was Kilo going to tell Yoongi what happened? He sat on the couch, subtly looking up as he waited for the door to open. 

Everyone else was secretly observing Jungkook. Something about him was weird. He wasn’t displaying his obvious anger like he usually does.

“Well, I don’t know if you’ve heard this often but you’re so damn useless, Kilo.” Yoongi cursed as he re entered the house, slamming the door closed. He turned to see Jungkook’s stare on him.

“What?” He sneered at Jungkook. The others waited for Jungkook to fight back but he just bit his lip. 

“Nothing.” He shook his head. 

“Whatever.” Yoongi rolled his eyes and proceeded to head to the kitchen. The others couldn’t even hide their shock. What happened with Jungkook? Just yesterday, he was ready to rip Namjoon’s head off in a fight. Today, he was quiet, kept his head down and was docile. 

Jungkook didn’t know what to do. If he told them, would they even believe him after the way he has been acting since they arrived here? He didn’t know. But he knew that even if he was angry with you, you deserved to be rescued. 

Just not by him. 

“W-Wait!” Jungkook blurted. 

“What?” Yoongi asked again. For the first time in a while, Jungkook felt so small as the other 6 hybrids stared at him. He gulped. 

“Spit it out.” Namjoon scoffed. 

“I-I heard Kilo on the phone last night with agent Delta.” Jungkook confessed. Yoongi stopped. He wondered if Jungkook possibly knew the reason why Kilo was acting weird when he asked about you earlier. Yoongi looked towards the front door, grabbing Jungkook’s forearm and pulling him deeper into the kitchen. 

“What did you hear?” 

“It’s about your owner.” Jungkook said. Right, Jungkook had also started to deny being your adopted hybrid. He didn’t acknowledge you as his owner anymore. 

“Kilo was saying something to another agent, I think it was Delta. (y/n) was kidnapped from her home the other night and he was saying something about a lead, that they were supposed to strike next week, not now. They found her distress signal at the house. They think she was kidnapped as bait to lure you guys out to rescue her.” Jungkook breathed. 

“F*ck.” Yoongi banged his fist on the counter. 

“(y/n)...” Taehyung whimpered. He and Jimin put their arms around each other as comfort. Jungkook just looked away. 

“We’re leaving.” Namjoon declared. 

“Namjoon is right. We can’t wait for these people to rescue her. We have to do it ourselves. If it’s a fight they want, it’s a fight they’ll get. Touch our mate and you cross the line.” Jin frowned. 

“Let’s talk later.” Yoongi grabbed his mug of coffee and left the kitchen. If Kilo suddenly saw them talking together, it would be too suspicious. 

CLANG!

You were jolted awake when you heard loud metal sounds. Blinking, you adjusted your vision to the slightly dim, cold and wet basement area. Wincing, you felt your bruised jaw from where the man punched you. You pushed yourself to stand up but felt a weight on your ankle. 

You looked down at the thick metal chain around your ankle. Just what have you landed yourself in? 

There were noises coming from the other cages beside you. You guessed that they were all fighting hybrids that belonged to the ring as well, all kept as prisoners just like you.

“Look who’s finally awake.” A voice said. You turned your head to see a man you didn’t recognise, standing there.

“Boss will be happy to hear that you’re awake.” He smiled at you and left. 

“Boss Im.” You came face to face with the boss again. You weren’t going to speak to anyone.

“You were asleep for 3 days.” Boss Im raised his eyebrows. You glared at him, crossing your arms. Boss Im just laughed and nodded over to you. You took a step back as the henchmen came into your cell with you. Soon, you felt punches and kicks rain down on you. As you curled into a ball, you covered your face with your hands. 

“Tell me where your precious hybrids are.” Boss Im spoke over the grunts and winces of pain you were releasing. 

You didn’t fight back or give in. You wanted to stall their attention for as long as possible so they won’t go out and conduct a manhunt to find your boys, and if you could gather some information or evidence about the ring, it would help.

“I... don’t have... hybrids.” You forced out. 

“Why are you being stubborn? Look where you are, look at the situation you’re in. Do you really want this to continue?” Boss Im chuckled.

“This is... nothing!” You coughed out blood. 

“Tsk! I don’t know why you’re fighting so hard to protect these animals. You’re a fool, you know that? Do you think this will protect them? They’re animals, they belong to fighting rings. You cannot save all hybrids, Doctor Echo. This is the way life is. Humans will always be above those mutts. Just hand them over and you’ll be a free woman.” Boss Im said. 

“I’d rather you kill me.” Yo cursed at him, grunting as someone landed a kick to your ribs. 

“Killing you is too easy. Until you’re ready to talk, you better get comfortable, I can tell you’re going to be here for a while.” Boss Im called his men back.

“Get ready, it’ll only get worse than this.” One of the men smirked at you before following his boss out. You groaned as you uncurled yourself. Laying on the cement floor, you coughed and stared at the ceiling. 

Your chest hurt as you inhaled and exhaled. You touched your ribs, feeling for any broken ones. Thankfully, you didn’t feel any breaks. They were probably just bruised. 

“E-Excuse me?” A voice broke your thoughts. Tiredly, you just turned your head to see a small, skinny girl standing by the door of your cell. You just faced the other way, not really bothered by her presence. She slowly entered your cell and placed something on the ground. 

“Here’s your lunch.” She whispered and scurried away. You got up and slowly approached the tray of food that was placed on the ground. 

You grabbed the plastic spoon and dug into a soupy rice with some kimchi on top. It was bland with no seasoning or flavour at all but you still ate it after not having food in your stomach for 3 days. 

“Ugh.” You dropped the spoon onto the tray. When you were done, you laid on the old mattress. 

“As long as the boys are safe.” You touched Yoongi’s scars on your shoulder. Those scars seemed to be the only reminiscent thing of the boys you had on your body now. 

You hoped that the organisation got your signal and was working to find you. But at the same time, you hoped the boys didn’t hear about your kidnapping or else they would set out to try and track you down. All these worries and the beating from earlier cause your head to pound and slowly, you drifted off again.

-

The boys were all gathered in the bedroom that the older hybrids shared. They locked the door, hoping Kilo wouldn’t notice them secretly meeting. 

“We’re leaving, tonight.” Namjoon said.

“Those that don’t want to go, you can stay here. I really don’t care. My priority is to find my mate and get her out.” Yoongi crossed his arms. He loved his brothers, really, but he wasn’t going to get into a fight with them by forcing them to go save you. That wasn’t the point of holding this discussion. He looked over at the obviously conflicted rabbit. 

“What’s the plan, hyung?” Taehyung asked. 

“Tonight, we’ll escape out the back. Around 1 am. We run into the forest and head back home. Maybe we can find some clues there.” Namjoon explained and everyone nodded. 

“You don’t have to decide now. If you’re not out by 1 am, that’s your reply.” Yoongi said dismissively.

“Are we really going to see (y/n) again, Tae?” Jimin tugged on the tiger’s sleeve when they left the elders’ room. Taehyung nodded, finally crackling into a small smile. 

“I’m going to take a nap. Come on, Chim.” Taehyung pulled Jimin with him to the maknaes’ room. Jimin watched his best friend fall asleep quickly, knowing that all of them haven’t been sleeping well and Taehyung constantly woke up in the middle of the night. 

Jimin reached up to touch his uneven ear. He shivered as he remembered how his old master punished him by clipping the end of his ear and laughing at him. 

Hearing that a fighting ring kidnapped you, he was afraid of what they would do to you. Fighting rings aren’t for humans, they’re for hybrids. He has never seen a human in the ring before. 

“Chim... Breathe...” Taehyung said sleepily, grasping Jimin’s wrist. 

“H-Huh? W-What?” Jimin didn’t even realise that he wasn’t breathing properly. Taehyung’s eyes still remained closed as he tried to pull the calico out of his anxiety attack.

“Breathe... You’re okay.” Taehyung assured. 

“I’ve got you.” Taehyung mimicked the exact words you would tell Jimin, wrapping an arm around his waist to hug him. 

“I’m sorry.” Jimin apologised softly. Taehyung shook his head to deny Jimin’s need for an apology and just proceeded to stroke the back of the smaller boy’s head. As Taehyung slowly fell back asleep, his soft and even breathing was what managed to calm Jimin down. He slipped out of Taehyung’s grip and left the room. 

“H-Hyung?” Jimin knocked. 

“What?” Yoongi opened the door. 

“Can I talk to you?” Jimin asked. Yoongi sighed and scratched the back of his neck but nodded, stepping aside for Jimin to enter the room. Jin and Namjoon weren’t inside, probably somewhere else in the house. 

“Is it really okay for me to go with you tonight?” Jimin asked, sitting on Namjoon’s bed. Yoongi sat on his own bed, opposite where Jimin sat.

“I have no idea what you’re asking me now.” Yoongi raised an eyebrow, leaning back on his hands.

“I want to help save (y/n) but... I’m afraid my anxiety will only hold you back. I don’t know if I should go with you all tonight because I don’t want to be a burden.” Jimin looked down at his lap. Yoongi didn’t say anything and just stared at the way Jimin’s ears folded down in sadness.

“Jimin. I’m just going to be honest with you here.” Yoongi started. Jimin looked up at him and nodded.

“Yeah, it probably will hold us back if you suddenly have an anxiety attack. But you’re going with us with the mindset to save (y/n), isn’t that all that matters? You could be crippled and if you still want to go, nothing or no one should stop you from doing it.” Yoongi said. 

“So it’s okay if I go?” 

“My opinion shouldn’t matter to you. If you really wanna save her, then go.” Yoongi shrugged. 

“Thank you, hyung.” Jimin stood up and was about to leave when Yoongi grabbed his wrist to stop him. He was surprised but turned around to face the panther. 

“No one thinks you’re a burden, okay? I know (y/n) wouldn’t be happy if you thought of yourself as one too.” Yoongi told him. Jimin nodded his head as he saw tears starting to pool in Yoongi’s eyes. 

“Better get some rest.” Yoongi let him go and Jimin left the room. 

When night fell, the hybrids watched from their positions in the kitchen and living room as Kilo locked the doors and windows. This was done every night to ensure that they don’t run away to try and reunite with you. Kilo bid them a lazy goodnight and went out the front door, which was his post for the night, until he came in to sleep on the couch. 

“Hyung, are you going?”  Jungkook asked when it was just him and his brother in the living room. 

“I miss her.” Hoseok admitted with a nod. 

“But she abandoned us, just like before. What if she does it again?” Jungkook’s voice quivered. Hoseok sighed, knowing his brother was still traumatised and angry over what happened.

“Even if she does, she’s my mate. My heart knows that she’s probably the only way I’ll smile again.” Hoseok said. It wass after you left that he realised that you were his mate. He hasn’t had a chance to confess to you but rescuing you will grant him that chance. 

“What if... I don’t go?” Jungkook asked cautiously. 

“Then that’s your decision to make, Kookie. This isn’t a permanent goodbye, we’ll still meet and see each other.” Hoseok gave a small smile. 

“Okay.” Jungkook wasn’t going to hold his brother back. He walked to his room and laid on his bed. 

When it came close to 1 am, Hoseok went to Jungkook’s room. He had his backpack slung over his shoulder. Jungkook sat on his bed, facing his brother with tears in his eyes. 

“So you’ve made your decision?” Hoseok asked softly. 

“Please don’t hate me.” Jungkook whispered as he hugged his brother.

“Oh, Kook. I’ll never hate you, the other as well. You’re old enough and I should respect your decision. I’m sure (y/n) would understand too. I’m just sorry I couldn’t be a better brother and protect you.” Hoseok stroked his head. 

“No. You’re the best older brother. It was me, all me.” Jungkook denied. Hoseok looked at the clock, it was getting close to 2 am. Hoseok tried his best to force a smile to be strong for his little brother. Leaning down, he pressed a kiss to Jungkook’s forehead. 

“I’m sorry, I can’t save her.” Jungkook covered his face as he cried. Hoseok pulled his hands away, making the younger look at him. Hoseok shook his head, not wanting his brother to feel bad for making his decision.

“Bye, Kook.” He ruffled his hair. 

“Bye, hyung. Please stay safe. I’ll see you when all this is over.” Jungkook sniffled, wiping his tears. Hoseok nodded and left the room with the heaviest heart. 

“Hyung...” Hoseok could hear Jungkook break down in his room. He let go of the doorknob and headed downstairs. Of course, he wanted to be with Jungkook. They have never separated since they’ve met. But you were his true mate, his instinct was to put you above everything else, just like Yoongi does. It hurt but he would just have to live with it for now. 

Taehyung had already managed to break the lock that secured the back door.  When the others saw the golden retriever coming down alone, with a sullen look on his face, and they knew what was Jungkook’s decision. 

“Once we get out, let’s try and see where we are. Then find a way to get back to our old house.” Yoongi instructed and everyone nodded. 

“I’m coming, kitten.” Yoongi kissed his necklace. They all looked at each other and stepped out the door, letting the cold winter air of the night greet them. Jimin held Jin’s hand.

“I’ll see you, Kookie.” Hoseok took a deep breath and they all ran out, jumping over the fence and taking off into the forest. 

Jungkook sobbed softly into his blanket. The house had never felt colder. He was really all alone. 

As much as he wanted to go save you, his heart wouldn’t let him. There was still an undeniable betrayal and pain that he felt. He had allowed himself to be vulnerable and trusting too many times and it always led to heartbreak. 

Standing by the window, he watched as the 6 dark figures took off, disappearing into the dark forest one by one. 

He looked down at his clenched fist, opening it up to see his purple dog tag sitting in his palm. 

~~

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[darling-i-read-it]

The Great Red Dragon

3x08

Hannibal Lecter x reader x Will Graham 

Hannibal Re-Write Series Masterlist

Word Count: 2.9k 

Warnings: spoilers for hannibal, murder, dead bodies, blood, surgery, canniblism  

Author’s Note: I LOVE will graham and you can tell in this chapter i kinda went ham with my absolute adoration for him. Usually i try and hold back but im to sad to tonight so here is this love letter to will graham 

I used some direct quotes from the script so some things may seem familiar 

Official Episode Summary: As events jump forward three years, Jack seeks help as he pursues Francis Dolarhyde, AKA `The Tooth Fairy Killer'.

I don’t own these characters. They belong to author/director 

Tag List (is always open!) : @llperfectsymmetryll​ @ericacactus​ @vlightning95​ @sweetgoodangel​

(not my gif) (can you tell i love will graham. i feel like its excessive now but he is so handsome in this episode and every epsiode but this episode too) 

Alana Bloom sat on an uncomfortable chair. The divider between her and Hannibal Lecter was a thick, clear plastic. To Hannibal they were sitting together at his desk. To her, to the reality of her, he sat in his jail cell. The two of them seemed comfortable with each other once again, now that there was no way Hannibal could lay his fingers on her again. 

It was the only reason Alana agreed to stay. 

“Congratulations, Hannibal. You’re officially insane.” 

In front of Hannibal were different and various papers. A newspaper sat there, detailing a family slaughtered in Buffalo. 

“There’s no consensus in the psychiatric community what I should be termed,” he said.

“You’ve long been regarded by your peers in psychiatry as something entirely Other. For convenience, they term you a monster.” Hannibal’s eyes flickered up, away from his papers and on to her. She had cleaned herself up since they were last close. The suit she wore made her look distinguished. Her hair up in curls. Sophisticated. 

“What do you term me?” he questioned.

“I don’t. You defy categorization.” 

“Do you still prefer beer to wine?” he questioned. She pursed her lips, remembering bad memories.

“Stopped drinking beer when I found out what you were putting in mine.”

“Who,” he corrected. She gave the slightest of nods.

“Who.” She paused for a moment, collecting her thoughts. “This means you’ll be spared the federal death sentence. They had enough to convict you dozen times over.” 

“A baker’s dozen. Lest we forget Mason Verger. You’re welcome.” 

“You’re welcome Hannibal. The needle was guaranteed. But you beat it all on an insanity plea.”

“I’m not insane.” Alana nodded. She understood that.

“You know that and I know that. A dozen or a baker’s dozen, enough people have died.” 

“You haven’t,” he pointed out simply. 

“A promise in waiting, isn’t it? A promise you intend to keep.” 

“I always keep my promises.” His lips flew into a small smile. Alana simply adjusted her spot in the seat.

-

“Get out of my chair, Frederick.” 

Chilton stood up from Alana’s chair. Since she had become the director of the asylum things had been changed. For the better. Chilton was crooked, despite his frequent placing in her chair. She walked over and sat down at her desk and reorganized the documents that Chilton had been messing with. 

“Shall we join hands in prayer of gratitude? ‘Thank you, Father, for allowing us to remove this monster, monster of monsters, from your flock. Thank you on behalf of the souls We will spare of pain.’” Chilton stood at the other side of her desk now. 

“Thank you on behalf of the monster.” She leaned back in her chair. “Was that the magisterial We?” 

“It’s our cabal, yours and mine. Hannibal Lecter will spend the rest of his life in a state institution, watching the diaper cart go by.”

“We lied. You wrote a book of lies,” she pointed out.

“Not difficult to see lies flying above my head, but it is almost impossible to shoot them down,” he pointed out. 

“You should be lucky that Y/N is a respectable woman. She should have sued you for what you insinuated between her and Hannibal,” she pointed out.

“You say that only because you couldn’t sue me for speaking the truth about you and Hannibal.” He dragged a finger along the desk. “I wasn’t invited to the wedding though.”

“You held the groom at this asylum when you ran it,” she pointed out.

“Still. I put the actual murderer in jail.” 

“I’m pretty sure they did that.” She picked up her pen. “Either way, Hannibal will shoot down your lies. He’s written a brilliant piece for The American Journal of Psychiatry.” 

“Everything he writes is always about problems he doesn’t have,” Chilton said. 

“What he’s written is going to be your problem. It’s not so much an article as it is a rebuttal.” She smiled to herself. “He has an acid pen.” 

-

Will stood out by the shed. The dogs were balancing around him, running around and barking happily. Will was bundled against the cold although you had been the person who threw all of the layers at him. The dogs kicked up the snow. He was repairing the fence out there, something to keep busy. 

He looked up the gravel driveway and a black SVU came down the track. 

He let out a sigh, caught by the cold. 

Jack Crawford came out of the car.

-

“Don’t want to talk inside?” Jack asked as Will handed him a mug of hot cider. Several stray dogs lay and mill at their feet as Will leaned against the porch railing. “Don’t want to let me inside. Come too far to let the cold stop me, Will.” 

Will pursed his lips.

“Bold of you to show up.”

“Where’s Y/N?” he questioned.

“Making dinner. She didn’t hear you coming up and was, lucky for you, unaware I was making two cups of cider.” Will was relaxed but his tone was uneven. 

“You don't want to talk about it here,” Jack said.

“I don't want to talk about it anywhere. You’ve got to talk about it, so let’s have it. Just don’t get out any pictures. There’s no point in doing that.” 

“How much do you know?” Jack questioned.

“Two families killed, in their homes, a month apart. Similar circumstances,” Will said. You and him and passed the newspaper to each other at breakfast. Looked into it. 

“Not ‘similar’. The same. You ever think about giving me a call?” 

“If I ever thought about it Y/N would divorce me on the spot. But I didn’t think about it,” he admitted.

“You know what it is,” Jack said. 

“I didn’t think about calling you because I didn’t want to. I don’t think I’d be all that useful to you, Jack. I never think about it anymore. I don’t believe I could do it now.” Will looked down at the lakeshore and Jack pulled out two pictures from his jacket pocket. He flipped them out on the table. Will looked down at them. 

“All dead. This freak seems to be in phase with the moon.” Jack tapped the photos. “Killed the Jacobis in Chicago almost four weeks ago. Full moon. Killed the Leeds family in Buffalo night before last. One day short of a lunar month. If we’re lucky we have a little over three weeks before he does it again.” 

“Will!” Your voice carried in from the home. Both men looked over. 

“Looks like your luck has run out Jack.” You opened the door to alert Will that dinner was done. Upon seeing Jack you stopped. For a moment you were wordless. You looked down at the two pictures on the table, at Will, and then back at Jack. You recognized those people from the newspapers. You took in a deep breath and held your composure.

“If you want to by any chance keep your head I would recommend picking up those pictures, putting them back in your pocket, getting off my goddamn porch and driving your car back to where you came from,” you said evenly. “And give me that cup of cider.” Jack handed it to you and you snatched it, allowing it to spill on your hand without a reaction. “We need Will’s help. More of these families are going to die,” Jack said.

“I’m not going to let this happen again. I let it happen once.” 

“You would sacrifice families lives for the miniscule chance one person gets a little hurt?” You stepped forward to him but Will lifted his hand. You stopped but you were still pretty close. 

“If that one person is Will then yes. He’s saved enough lives.”

“He isn’t going anywhere,” Will said. You looked up at him and stepped back. 

“Dinner is done,” you said and turned back into the house. Jack and Will shared a look.

“So,” Will started, pushing himself off of the balcony railing. “Joining us for dinner?” 

-

You sat beside Will who was at the head of the table. Jack observed the house. It looked simplistic, comforting. On the small shelf by the table were picture frames. Each one of both of you. One when you were fishing, a small fish in front of your face as you laughed. One of Will by the fireplace in the Baltimore house. A couple from the wedding of the two of you looking happier than Jack had ever seen. 

Jack had been at the wedding. Will invited him discreetly and because you were so distracted by your own happiness you couldn’t fight. You looked amazing. It had been a long time coming that day and when it did come everyone celebrated. There were even pictures of you, Margot and Alana on that day, cheering to a new beginning. 

“People dump small dogs here all the time. I can give away the cute ones, rest, stay around and get to be big ones,” you muttered, petting the dog at your feet. 

“You’ve always been a sucker for strays,” Will said.

“You’re not fooling anyone Will.” You stabbed at the plate and took a bite. Will placed a hand on your thigh and kept it there. You put your hand on top of his destreetly. 

“Got a nice life here,” Jack said. 

“I’m lucky here. I know that,” Will said. 

“Surprised there aren’t any kids yet. Bella and I wanted them but with my job we could never fit it in.” The mention of Bella would make you sympathize with him and he knew that. Despite having calmed down a bit you still held up a good face. 

“We have a lot of dogs although I can’t say we haven't been trying,” Will said. His face flushed a bit but you were so mad still you couldn’t even be flustered. Will knew there were some things you needed to say to Jack that you couldn't’ say in front of him. “I’m going to take the dogs out to pee.” He tapped your thigh once more before letting his hand leave as he stood up from the dinner table. You nodded numbly as he left, watching him go.

Your gaze went back to Jack. 

“When you came into his classroom that day I wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt but you failed me Jack. Countless times, you failed me.” 

“You left me there to die In Florence.” You smiled. 

“A fond memory.” You placed your fork down carefully. “You’re going to take him no matter how much I want to kill you for it.” 

“I have to. I’ll make it as easy on him as I can. He’s changed. It’s great you got married.” You nodded.

“He’s better and better. He doesn’t have nightmares anymore.” You paused and collected yourself. “He was really obsessed with the dogs for a while. Now he just takes care of them. He doesn’t talk about them all the time. Doesn’t worry about them.” 

“I know what it is I’m asking Y/N. And I wished to God I didn’t have to.”

You smiled slightly at what you were about to say.

“If he decides to go, and that’s a big if, he will not be going alone.” Jack nodded slowly. He figured this would happen. There was nowhere he went you would not follow.

“I know.”

“And you’re willing to deal with me for as long as it takes to get rid of this killer?” 

“If I have to.”

-

You sat on your bed. The world was quiet out here. You loved it. Will loved it. It was why you got it together, your first joint home purchase. Will was taking off his shoes and you put your arms around him from behind. 

He cuddled his head against yours. He could feel your breath against his skin when you spoke.

“I don’t want you to go, you know that.” 

“I don’t imagine you’ll let me go alone,” he whispered. “But you know if I go, I’ll be different when I get back.” You nodded.

“I loved you at your worst and I’ll love you for the rest of the time you’ll let me,” you promised. You kissed him tenderly and his hands rested on your cheek, moving your body with his other hand so that he didn’t have to crane his neck. 

-

Darkness moved around the bedroom peacefully. You slept beside Will but he was awake. He looked over at you and then slid out of bed. He pulled open a drawer quietly and took out a letter. The envelope is addressed to Will and Y/N, through the FBI. He hadn’t shown you this yet. He wasn’t sure if he should. 

But you had felt him get up. Years of feeling when he was having a nightmare trained you for that kind of moment. You sat up and slid out of bed. Will looked over to you.

“What’s that?” 

“I wasn’t going to show it to you.”

You walked over to him and put your arms around him from behind. You looked at the letter and the second you saw the handwriting you froze. 

“Is it directed to you?”

“Both of us.”

You took it from his hands and stood up straight. 

‘Dear Will and Y/N, we have all found a new life, but our old lives hover in the shadows, like incipient madness. Soon enough, I fear Jack Crawford will come knocking. I encourage Will, as a friend, not to step back through the door he holds open. I don’t doubt Y/N will protest against this ever happening but in case her will is not strong enough I must promise that there is darkness on the other side of the door and madness is waiting.’ 

You handed him the paper. 

“I’m calling the girls from down the street. Their teenagers will watch the dogs.” 

-

Will and you looked through the Leeds house. The two of you looked at the bloody remnants of what had happened there. You weren’t there to observe though. You were there for moral support. 

His eyes were shut for a while. You watched him stand there. You were silent.

Until he opened his eyes and a deep breath left his lips. You quickly approached him and hugged him tightly. He hugged you back, catching his breath in your arms.

-

“Jimmy you’re the light of my life,” Jack said.

“I know. The print’s smudged. Came off Mrs. Leeds eye. Never did that before. Never would’ve seen it, but it stood out against an eight-ball hemorrhage,” Jimmy explained. You, Will, Jack, Jimmy and Brian all stood in the morgue together. He kept stealing glances at you and Will whose thoughts were elsewhere. “I just...I can’t believe you’re back. I’m surprised you're back.”

“I’m surprised Y/N didn’t drag Jack's dead body in here,” Brian said. He hit Will’s back. “Welcome back.” 

-

Jack looked up from his desk to see Will and you standing before him. You were both looking at the information sheet. 

“You were asking about the dog. Last night, a vet called the police. Leeds and his oldest boy brought it into the bet the afternoon before they were killed,” Jack explained. 

“What’s going to happen to it?” Will asked.

“Please don't worry about the dog.” Will smiled a bit.

“What do you expect me to do?” he whispered. You smiled at him. Ever the sweetie. 

“Best you can, that’s all. Busyworks been a narcotic for me sometimes, especially after I quit the booze. For you too, I think,” Jack said. 

“There’s something else we can do,” you started. You paused for a moment. You and Will had talked this over just briefly but you understood it was what you needed. “We can wait until Will is driven to it by desperation in the last days before the full moon. Or we could do it now, while it might be of some use,” you finished. 

“Is there an opinion you want?” Will nodded slowly.

“We have to see Hannibal.”

3x09

[crescentsteel]

Just Friends - Part 7

plot: fubu set up with Kuroo , model fem reader warnings: sexual tension, slow burn word count: 7.2k 

A.N:

- Finally!! I'm so glad to finally release this. October was so hectic and I'm a very slow writer. - I'm so sorry for the mistakes on the previous chapters. No one beta reads for me. So I went back and edited Chapters 3-6. - So sorry for the word vomit on this chapter. I was out of control. - Thank you for all the nice comments!! I swear. They keep me fired up and inspired.  - As always, lmk if you want to be tagged in any of my works,

Part 6 | Part 8 |  m.list

“No! It’s not what you think!”

Kuroo almost laughs at how cliche you sounded, a typical response of someone who’s been caught red-handed. You’re about to chase Kenma, but he grabs your wrist to stop you.

“Maybe you should wear your shirt before you go after ‘im.” He tries to hide the mirth in his expression and tone. Your face is so red, you look like you’re about to burst. He also doesn’t want to add up more to the awkwardness you might feel later, so he’s gonna let this one slide. He’ll just pretend that the massage thing was as harmless as it should be. 

You put your shirt in a jumble and walk briskly to Kenma. He follows at his normal pace, settling behind you when he catches up to you and Kenma.

“Sorry about that,” you laugh nervously. “He was just giving me a back massage.”

It was kinda the truth, but Kenma looks dubious. 

“It sounded more than a massage.”

He covers his lips with his back hand so he wouldn’t laugh. Although his rascal self wants to tease you more, he can’t let you feel any more embarrassed than this. He looks at Kenma and shakes his head minutely with a knowing look, hinting not to push the subject any further. 

“Naah. Y/n here is just really stressed so she moans like she’s being fucked.” Okay, maybe he couldn’t completely let it slide after all. 

You irritatedly look at him and punch his arm with more force than usual. “Piss off,” you hiss. 

He dramatically rubs the arm you just hit. “Ow! So violent.”

Kenma ignores the antics and just passes by you two. He’s about to plop himself on the couch, but pauses. He instead gets a chair and seats himself there.

You couldn’t overlook that. Obviously, in Kenma’s mind, you and Kuroo were doing something indecent there so he doesn’t want to be in it. You want to clear it up to Kenma that you really weren’t doing anything of that sort. Well, you were about to pounce on Kuroo, but still, it didn’t actually happen. 

In a way, you’re relieved that Kenma interrupted at the right time. You might have done something you will harrowingly regret afterwards.

“Don’t sweat it, y.n. He just misinterpreted it.” Kuroo’s unusually magnanimous today. It’s strange. He wouldn’t have lived this down on a regular day. Maybe it's because of your no sex relationship? Still, this is aberrant of him. He shouldn’t fail to notice how that last  moan of yours was not of comfort. 

“Right?” He adds, his eyes gauging your own.

So that’s how it is. He is aware. But he’s giving you the option to disregard what just almost happened. You’re relieved, but also confused at the tiny shards of disappointment prickling in your chest. This is what you wanted, for you to avoid sex and Kuroo in the same room. It shouldn’t be confusing.

You look down and break away from the eye contact. You put a hand on your hip and the other on your temple, which then moves to brush your hair back.

With a long, audible puff, you speak.

“Of course, it was nothing,” you return to his gaze with a dry expression to camouflage the lie behind your words. But at the same time, you also wait for him to say something or for his eyes to show something other than indifference. You don’t know what it is you want or expect, but you wait for it. You’ll know it when you see it. 

It doesn’t come though as he shrugs it off like it was nothing. 

Disappointed, that’s what you are. You don’t like the feeling, but you are.

—

You ring your driver again, hoping that this time he’ll finally answer. If he doesn’t get to you any soon, you’ll be late for your shoot. You can’t be late for this shoot in particular. Mitsuki’s the creative director. She’s a very pleasant one, but she absolutely hates tardiness. No exceptions. She gets all sour and crank when someone’s late. 

The other end of the line picks up. “Ms l/n. I’m so sorry. One of the tires got flat. I need to change it, but I’m still stuck in traffic.”

Of all the days to get a flat tire on a heavy traffic, it had to be this day. You exhale heavily to clear the irritation getting under your skin. 

“How long before you’re here?”

“I think about an hour, Ms.”

You aren’t the type to get mad at hired help, but you’re really in a pinch. In an hour, you should be in hair and make up already, not arriving only then. Mitsuki gets enraged when someone’s 15 minutes late. To be late an hour, you can’t imagine how she’d be. There’s no way you’re going to wait here for an hour.

“Don’t come anymore. Just get it fixed.” You say coldly before you end the call. It wasn’t the driver’s fault. You wouldn’t bother getting a driver if your car hadn’t been acting up recently. Being dumb this morning, you forgot about your busted car and was late in this morning’s meeting with a client. You found yourself brisk walking in heels at the hotel’s lobby earlier just to save yourself from any more delayed minutes. And now, even your driver’s car is jacked up. 

“Y.n?”

You turn around at the recognizable calm voice you heard. It’s Kenma, except he wasn’t alone. Kuroo is right there beside him. It was kind of weird to see them together at this place and both in business wear. 

“What’re you two doing here?” 

“I’m working with Kenma here to sponsor our next promotional video.”

You just stared at the two of them. You’re used to the three of you just fooling around when you’re together. Meeting like this when you’re all in the middle of doing your jobs is something new to you. 

“And who might you be giving a hard time on the phone, hmm y.n.?”

They heard that? They must both be near while you were getting bummed out from being late this morning and potentially late this afternoon. 

“Ah! I need to go. My driver can’t make it. I’m going to be late,” you spiral back to your hectic schedule. “Bye.” You give them a quick wave, and despite your heels, you walk as fast as you could towards the entrance of the hotel. 

You try to hail cabs that were passing by, but almost every cab was occupied. And for some reason, someone always managed to get the empty cabs before you can even spot them. To worsen your luck, it began to rain. You frantically tap your left foot on the concrete as the panic sets in you.

Mitsuki’s gonna kill me.

You bite your lip and contemplate how you’re going to arrive in the venue on time. The answer you found made you turn back on your heels to go back inside the hotel, only to find them already there behind you. 

“You’re here,” you exhale, relieved that they haven’t gone anywhere out of your sight. “I’m in a bind. Can anyone give me a ride?” 

The two men exchanged pithy looks, but you don’t bother figuring out what that could’ve meant. You just need the help you typically won’t ask for since you’re always doing things on your own.

“I can’t. I have a stream coming up. Sorry, y.n.” Kenma first spoke. You shift to Kuroo, hoping that he can give you the time of day. “Yea, sure. Am free for the rest of the day actually.” He says with a brief smile. 

“Oh, thank God!” The panic and nerves were clearing out of your system. Despite the awkwardness of your previous massage fiasco, right now, you’re glad that he can help. 

“Bye, then.” Kenma quickly took his leave as the hotel valet stepped out from his car and handed him his keys. 

“Should we go now?” Kuroo asked. “Aren’t we waiting for your car?” “No. I don’t want strangers handling my car.” “Then why did you go here?”

Amusement shows on his face at your question. “I saw your cute attempt to hail a cab. Is that how rich kids do it? Let someone else steal their ride for them?” You smile sweetly, disgustingly sweet, then roll your eyes before saying, “Let’s just go.”

You told him the location of the shoot. The drive was comfortable as you both share work conversations with your usual banters on the side. Being friends with Kuroo is confusing and reassuring at the same time. With the history you two shared, you need to tread the waters of your friendship carefully every once in a while. If it wasn’t the sexual tension, it was the affection you felt towards him that would sometimes seem like resurfacing. Even with all that, you can’t bear to walk away from what you presently have. You feel like you really found genuine company with him and Kenma.

“We’re here. Let me just get an umbrella.” He looks back to the back seat and stretches his right arm to reach for it. The current angle of his face emphasized his sharp jaw and the length of his neck. You were just thinking how you need to tread carefully, but easier said than done when you know exactly how your fingers have grazed that jaw, how your tongue has tasted that neck, and much more. 

“What’s taking you so long? I might as well get drenched from the rain,” you snap because you can’t stand your own indecent thoughts. 

“Found it.” He says and returns to his normal sitting position. “Why the hell are you suddenly cranky? Geez.” You feel bad for being suddenly grouchy. He was just being nice and you were being nasty for reasons you can’t tell him. “Sorry. Just don’t want to be late,” you apologized.

He shrugs it off nonchalantly. “Hey. Where’s my umbrella?” You ask when you see him reaching for the door with only one umbrella in his hand. 

“We’re sharing this. I only have one.”

You purse your lips to the side and sharply avert your eyes elsewhere, your irritation resurfacing again. You feel uncomfortable with the idea of being that physically close to him. You’ve pushed the massage incident behind, but that doesn’t mean you’ve forgotten about it. 

“What is up with you? What are you so pissed about?”

“Nothing. Can we go now?”

He stares at you for a good 3 seconds before getting out and opening his umbrella. He moves to your side of the vehicle and opens the door. You get out and try to avoid any raindrops. He closes the door and presses his car keys to lock the vehicle. 

You both start to walk towards the entrance of the place. You’ve never felt more awkward in your life. You’re avoiding getting past the edge of the umbrella while also avoiding Kuroo’s body. 

“Why is your umbrella so small?” 

“The heck are you talkin about? This is the standard size.”

You don’t answer him. The umbrella isn’t small. He’s just huge and his whole body occupied almost all the space under the shade. You flinch when he suddenly grabs you by the shoulder and pulls you close, so close that you can feel the firmness of his body pressed onto yours. 

You raise your gaze to him with a raised eyebrow. 

“You’re gonna get wet if we don’t huddle closer.” You could accept his reason, if only you didn’t catch the miniscule curl of his lips and the skittish glint in his eyes. It was so typical of him really. Maybe you should stop being so worked up all the time. 

“Fine.” Even though he was messing you, you can’t deny that it’s much more comfortable. You’re safe from the rain and his body provided heat from the coldness of the downpour.

He doesn’t do or say anything more as you both get to the doorway of the bar where the shoot will be held. He puts down the umbrella when you reach the shade of the building. Before you’re able to get away from Kuroo’s hold, the door opens. Mitsuki was holding her phone to her ear when she met your eyes. 

“I was calling you and you weren’t — oh.” Her eyes flew to the hand on your shoulder and traveled to its owner. “Well, well, y/n. You leave for a good while, then come back loaded.” You can always count on Mitsku to not hold her tongue. You gently release yourself from Kuroo’s hold to avoid looking defensive. “It’s not like that,” was your thrift reply. 

“Kuroo, this is Mitsuki, my creative director for today, sometimes my friend too. Mitsuki, this is Kuroo.” 

Both of them exchange casual greetings for meeting the first time. 

“How come you mention our relationship, but not yours?” referring to you and Kuroo. You sigh. “He’s also a friend.” You turn to Kuroo and thank him for the ride and his time. 

“Is your driver picking you up?” he asked.

You seal your eyes shut at your own stupidity. Because you were panicking and irritated, you sent your driver home. You open them again and purse your lips in a straight line. “No. I’ll just take a cab.”

“With your cab-hailing skills in this rain? Good luck with that.” he snorts. “Haha. Real funny.” From the corner of your eyes, you see Mitsuki with an entertained grin on her face, obviously enjoying the exchange between you and Kuroo. 

“Call me when you’re done. I’ll come pick you up then.” You want to protest but it will just drag on. You don’t want Mitsuki seeing more of the dynamics of your relationship, so you thriftly say “Okay.”

“Kuroo-san, right?” Both of you shift your attention to Mitsuki. “Actually, we need a male model because the scheduled one today is a total wimp and cancelled last minute.” She shamelessly eyed Kuroo from head to toe. So that’s why she was about to call you. The shoot was cancelled. 

When she looks at you, you mouth the word “no” to let her know that she shouldn’t do what you think she’s about to do. The reaction you got was her smiling widening before speaking to Kuroo. “Do you have an agent? Can we talk over the phone right now to discuss?”

That’s when you step forward. “Uhhh. He’s not a model. He used to be a volleyball player, hence the height and build.” You say defensively. You nudge Kuroo with your elbow so that he’ll back you up, but he doesn’t say anything. He’s just there waiting for Mitsuki’s next words. 

“An athlete, I see.” She nods approvingly. “That’s perfect! I don’t have to talk to anyone. It’s completely up to you then.”

“Errr. I don’t really know anything about modeling. Sorry.”

Your relief was short-lived when she tugs you to her direction and grips both of your shoulders. “Then your friend here can guide you. She’ll be your co-model anyways.” 

He probably figured out by now why you were so apprehensive during the conversation just now. You don’t want him as your co-model. 

His grin just confirmed your thoughts. “I’ll go for it then.” His eyes sparkling with mischief made you surrender. You already admit defeat in your head even though the shoot is just about to start. 

You both get in hair and makeup. Being a woman, you take longer to finish. The clothes the stylists are arranging on you are taking while as well.  They let you wear a very long, elegant gold dress that fits your upper body like your second skin, but the material is flowy from your waist down. When you arrive at the set, he’s already there talking with Mitsuki while waiting for you. Mitsuki notices you first. “Alright! We’re good to go.”

When Kuroo faces you, you almost don’t recognize him. His usual emo bangs were gone. They brushed his hair up cleanly. The suit he was wearing earlier was replaced by gray slacks and white long sleeve polo that has two top buttons open. You have conflicted feelings towards the hair and make up staff that did the work. They did a remarkable job with his overall style. He does look like a model like this. But also, why the hell did they make him look this damn good? The regular Kuroo was bad enough for you.

“This feels weird. I feel like I have too many things on me.” You scowl at his remark. “Too many? Wanna try being a girl?” He’s about to retort but Mitsuki claps twice which calls both of your attention.

“So our client is a liquor brand and the theme is something like wild love at the bar. What I want is you two giving the impression of having a passionate first encounter while you’re out drinking. Give me something and we’ll work it out as we go on, mkay?” 

You knew you’d be working with a male model for this brand, but you didn’t expect that they’d go with something like this. You thought it was just going to be glamour shots to showcase the drink.

But what Mitsuki said, ‘Wild love at the bar’?? That is not something you’d want to be doing with him. It reminded you of the first night you met. 

“I’m all ears on what to do, y/n” His haughty smile doesn’t help the situation one bit. You take a deep breath. This is not the time to muck around. You’re the experienced one, so you’ll be taking the lead. “Swear to me that you’ll take this seriously.” You glare at him, no trails of humor apparent. The change in his demeanor surprised you. You forgot how intimidating he can get when he’s serious. You’re so used to him being an idiot all the time that it catches you off guard. But for today, you’re glad to have it.

You explain to him how the whole shoot will go. For the first shot, you ask a staff member for a chair and tell Kuroo to sit on it. “Get the glass with the liquor and look at the camera while holding it.” He did as you told, except he has this perplexed look on his face with a noticeable discomfort from the way his lips curled in a corner. 

“On second thought, maybe this is a bad idea,” he said after trying the first time. You want to agree with him, but the shoot is already happening. You just want to get over it already since you’re already there. “Nooo. Uh-uh.” Mitsuki’s tone took a sharp turn. She wasn’t happy with what Kuroo said. “Just imagine you’re in a bar, chilling with your favorite drink and you just snagged the hottest girl in the place.” 

“Hottest girl aka me,” you comment on her instruction. That seemed to work because he changed back to his normal self and looked at you with amusement. “Just like the night we met, huh?” He said it low enough for only you to hear, but you still glanced nervously to Mitsuki if she caught any of it.  

“That’s a nice expression, Kuroo! Keep looking at her like that.” You ease up since it looks like she didn’t hear it. You put your elbow on his shoulder and tilt your hips to give your waist an S curve while angling your body towards him at the same time. You lift your chin up a bit and look at the camera with parted lips.

“Yep. Looking good dear.” Mitsuki signals the photographer to start taking the shots. You both slightly alter your angles so the pose will have variations. Sometimes you look at Kuroo, smile flirtatiously at him, or look at the camera in a sultry way. Every time you two would look at each other, you’d ‘cheat’ and look at the bridge of his nose to give the illusion that you’re actually looking at his eye. 

While looking at the shots from a separate screen, she suddenly asks the photographer to stop. You both straighten your bodies while awaiting instructions.  “It looks nice,” she said before looking at your direction. “But it’s boring. There’s nothing wild about it.”  You space out for a bit because for the first time, you don’t know how to proceed. You’re used to fashion shoots and runway. You’ve never had an ad with this theme. “Y.n, dear, can you be a bit aggressive towards him?”

You raise your eyebrow from disbelief. “A-aggressive?”

Mitsuki nods. “Throw yourself at him, dominate him, take control. mkay?” You feel a bit pressured when she’s just looking at you two and waiting for you to start posing for the camera. You don’t have a solid idea in your head, but you just go for it. You try to prop yourself up on the bar counter, but your dress won’t allow you.

Kuroo notices your dilemma and gets up from his seat. “You could’ve asked for help, you know.” He positions himself in front of you and grabs your waist. His hands were strong yet gentle. With your palms still on the surface of the counter, he lifts you up while you put weight on your arms so you can usher yourself properly. You’ve been deliberately avoiding his gaze, but right now, your eyes are glued to his face. 

“Yes. Like that.” You both flick your gaze towards Mitsuki. “Do that.” She instructs the photographer to move the side so the angle of the shot captures you both without him blocking you completely. You realize the position you two have. “I agreed to this to make you uncomfortable, but I’m not gonna lie. I’m the one extremely uncomfortable right now.” Kuroo whispers with a hint of regret on his face. The camera flashes start going off but something clicked between the two of you that you two end up laughing. It’s probably the awkwardness and the nerves that’s been hanging on the air that something so shallow as Kuroo admitting his uneasiness, cracked you both up.

It was just a brief exchange of laughter but you feel relaxed. Even though Mistuki is pretty cool for a creative director, she’s still as serious as any professional. So when you see her smiling as you apologized for the delay, you’re a bit shocked.

“No worries dear. Let’s continue then.”

You feel more confident now. You’re you. The reason you became successful on an international level is because of your professionalism and ability to produce quality results.

From being seated on the counter, you’re a few centimeters taller than Kuroo. That completed the idea in your head. You took the glass drink and placed it on your right hand. “Put your hands on my hips,” you tell him then lightly lift his chin with your index finger, “and look at me like you worship me.” The command earned a raised eyebrow from him but you pay no heed to it.

You extend an arm over his right shoulder, the glass dangling on your fingertips. With your index finger on his chin, you look to the camera with provocative eyes. If anything looks wrong with Kuroo, you’ll just let Mitsuki handle it. After all, she’s the one who asked him to be a part of this. 

“Oh yea! That’s really good.” Compared to before, she looks pleased with the shots now. The pose was captured a few times before she speaks again. “Instead of using your finger, grab his hair to tilt his head back.” You comply immediately and tugs his locks downwards. You might’ve done it a bit rougher than you wanted because you heard a raspy grunt from his throat. You got distracted, so instead of looking at the camera, you look at him. 

You regret it. When you said he should look at you with worship, you didn’t think he’d do it this well. Because his hair is pushed completely all the way back, you see every aspect of his face. Nothing was blocking his eyes that were full of yearning and desire. He’s looking at you like you’re not just the hottest girl in the bar, but the most beautiful person he’s ever laid eyes one. 

“Pull him closer and look here y.n.” You do as you’re told, thankful that you needed to look somewhere else. “Damn. You two look so good right now.” She gently claps her hands while looking at the monitor.

“I’m already satisfied, but let’s just do one more for another option. Umm, Kuroo. You be the aggressor this time. Y/n, …. you know what to do.” She winks after.

Well, not really you don’t. She just wants you to do the thinking on what to do. You put the glass down and put both your hands on his shoulders. “Help me down?” You ask with an easygoing smile. You don’t want to ruin the momentum of the shoot, so you decide to be nice to him for now. 

 “You got it,” then his hand travels up your waist and guides you down back to the floor. You tell him to lean on the counter. He follows with no complaints. You get his arm and ushers him to wrap it on your waist. When he goes along with your silent instruction, you raise your leg to his side.   

“Tug my skirt up to my thighs.”

He doesn’t react and just squints at you.. “Huh?” Since he did not grasp what you meant, you take it to yourself to do it and slowly gather the material at the ends. Then, you yank it up to your thigh. “Get it?” He whistles as he gets the cloth from your hands. “Hey. Don’t do that. If you’re a real model, you’d be in trouble if I report that behavior.”

“But I’m not a real model, am I?” You glare at his provocation. You won’t be having any of his crap at your workplace. “Kuroo,” you say with a menacing glare and he immediately gets the threat behind it. “My bad, my bad. I’ll behave again, kay? Stop scowling now.” You relax your face and take a deep breath. “Moving on then.” You enclose your left arm on his neck while you plant your right on his chest. You don’t want to direct him any further than this. If this is unsatisfactory, Mitsuki will say something. 

Aaaand she does. “Kuroo-san. Aggressive please. Own her. You don’t want her to get away from you.” Upon hearing Mitsuki’s additional instructions, everything about him intensifies three folds. He pulls you even closer, causing your breath to hitch when his face is dangerously near yours all of a sudden. His sleeves don’t do anything to mask the firmness of his arms. And even with the velvet fabric, you can still the strength of his thighs as they’re pinned on yours. The heat of his hand ignited the skin of your thigh as he clutched the fabric and your flesh forcefully. And his eyes, they no longer worship you. They spoke of something similar, but not quite. 

He wants to devour you whole. 

It was too overwhelming for you, so you look away and close your eyes dramatically to make it seem like you’re being swept away in the moment. After one camera flash, “Okay dear, but I need you to look at him this time.”

The few seconds of breaking away from his fiery stare did you some good. You were able to collect yourself again, but not enough to truly look at him. You just focus your gaze right between his eyes as you did earlier.  

“Nooo. When I said look at him, I meant really look at him. Respond with your own passion. You’re looking a bit of a scared vegetable right now, honey.” You’ve never had feedback like that in forever. Maybe when you tried modeling the first few months, you received something similar to that. But never when you started doing it full time. 

You don’t want to, but you have to. You finally meet his gaze and tap into something inside yourself that you’ve been holding back. You let your desire for him deluge you, let it surge through your veins until you’re aching for him. You push yourself even closer to him, not allowing even air to pass between your bodies. 

“Yes! YES! You want him so much, but you shouldn’t.” 

It was just as she said. You want him so much, so much that it almost hurts. You part your lips slightly as you get lost in the moment.

“Oh my God.” Her words sounded distant. It was there. You can hear it, but what clouded your senses was your heart pounding hard against your chest, his hot breath mingling with yours, and the way his eyes are now devoted to your lips. Not long after, he angles his face so that your lips are almost touching. Just a tiptoe and a kiss will already take place. You clench your fingers on his shirt, holding yourself back from that one tiny push that will allow you to feel his lips on yours again. 

“Holy Shit! HOLY SHIT! That was it. That was the money shot.” Mitsuki’s shrill voice which was followed by her squeal broke the trance you were in. You know what she meant. The shoot is done. Yet, you still feel hot. The heated atmosphere around you two still hasn’t caved in. He let go of your thigh as you put some space away from him. You settle your hands on his shoulders while you rest your forehead on his chest. He doesn’t move either. His hand remains on your waist, but without the force this time. With his other hand, he caringly skims the curve of your shoulder. 

“You okay, kitten?”

His voice is so gentle, you nearly convince yourself that it sounded loving. You nod weakly before heading back to the dressing room without saying anything. 

Kuroo’s gaze followed your back as you disappeared. He was amazed but also bothered at what just happened. You looked really into it, like you really wanted him. If the shoot didn’t finish any sooner, he might have closed that tiny gap that separated your lips from his. He’s been aching for you for so long that his control is slipping inch by inch every time there’s an opportunity to cross that line of friendship you set. When he saw you let go and completely relent within his hold, it was maddening at how he couldn’t have you at the moment. What’s worse is that even without the glamorous set, he knows you’re still not his to have. 

He walks towards the room where his clothes were hung and changes back to his usual suit. He asked the make up staff to remove everything on his face. He doesn’t like the feeling of having a layer of cosmetics on his skin. The hair they couldn’t do anything about because they used a lot of product to fix it up. 

When he gets out of the room, Mitsuki approaches him with a satisfied look on her face

“You did so well for someone with no experience at all. Do you have a card? I can hook you up for other gigs. You’ll do great.”

He smiles graciously at her generous offer, but he doesn’t want it. “Sorry, but I’m not really interested. I only did it cause it was her.” He said truthfully. Mitsuki’s mouth curled in amusement. “You know, y.n’s really good to work with. She always had this cool facade that never went down, and it works for her. We love her for it. But today,” she pauses as she gives him a meaningful look. “I’ve never seen her show such vulnerability and rawness. It was,” she sighs with admiration for you.

“Beautiful, wasn’t it?” He knows exactly what she’s saying. After all, he has seen several times how captivating your authenticity can be. 

“Soo, are you two dating or what?” Her eyebrows twitch up and down from anticipation at what he’s about to answer. He badly wants to say yes, but he doesn’t have that luxury. “Naaah. Like she said, I’m just a friend.”

She’s obviously dissatisfied with his response. He is too, but that’s the lousy truth. Out of the blue, she takes her phone out. “Too bad though. You two looked really good here.” She showed him the photo and it was you and him earlier. You were seated in the counter with your arms on his shoulders and his hands on your waist. It was when you were both laughing at his stupid statement.

“Can you send me that photo?”

“Why should I?”

He’s well aware of what she’s trying to do. It’s a business transaction, except for the lack of formality. She wants to get something in return, and he knows exactly what it is. 

“You’re good.” He admits with an impressed glint in his eyes.

“I am. So what’ll it be?” He knows that she knows she has the upperhand of the negotiation. She could probably tell that there’s something going on with the two of you. It’s just a matter of deciding which information to give her. But he didn’t have the fortune of having too many options. He didn’t want to reveal the nature of your relationship before. He wasn’t sure of your feelings for him. He can only speak for himself. 

“Fine. I sorta like her.” 

Her eyes brighten up. “Aha! I knew it. You should totally ask her out, kay? You’re gonna have tall and beautiful babies.” She put one hand on her cheek and closed her eyes while screeching at her own daydream of you and him getting together. When she calms down, she sends you the image file. “For real though. I’ve never seen her like that,” she points to your dazzling face in laughter in the photo. 

“Hey. What’re you two talking about?” You’re back to your normal clothes, but your hair and makeup was still there. 

“Nothing. Let’s go now?” He spoke immediately before your nosy director could say something. He walks to your direction before heading out together. “Bye! Update me, Kuroo-san!” Mitsuki said as she waved goodbye. You couldn’t help but be curious on what he should update her about. 

The rain stopped so no more umbrella horseplay. When you both get inside his car, you immediately ask him, “What was that about?”

“Uhh. She asked if I wanted to do other modeling projects.”

“Do you?”

He didn’t hesitate before answering, “No. That sort of stuff is not for me. I only did it to piss you off.” He starts the engine, then pivots his body to face you. “I must say though. I enjoyed seeing you eyefuck me.” Just when you are getting used to the peaceful, non-smug Kuroo, his true personality kicks right back in. Good thing you took your time getting changed and basically just calmed yourself down. 

“Glad you did. That’s the most you can get from me after all.”

His smile turned upside down at your remark. “Tch.” Your lips tug upwards at the side from his lack of retaliation. 

“I haven’t told you yet, but it wasn’t my first modeling experience.” 

You’re a bit surprised. Even though he has the appearance of a model, you didn’t think he’d do it. You agree with what he said just a while ago. It wasn’t for him. He’s best at his job right now. 

He gets his phone and scrolls up. He must be looking for a photo to show you as proof. When you see his screen, your heart swells. It was you and him a year ago. The neckline of your shirt was pulled to your shoulder for a makeshift off-shoulder while he knotted his t-shirt to form a crop top. You two wore large smiles while posing silly in front of the cam. It was right after when you told him that you’re a model.

“I- you... umm. You kept these?” You swipe the screen and see every single photo you took that day. Not one was deleted. You remember the laughter and absurd joy behind each frame. 

“Yea. Why wouldn’t I?”

One more swipe and there’s no other photo after yours. That’s when you notice that the photos are in the Favorites album. You felt like you were about to tear up. You’ve never felt so cherished in your whole life. Even though you left without saying a proper goodbye and no indication of going back, he still kept them. You tried so hard to forget about him, yet there he was, keeping these small tokens of what you had - proof that you really had been a part of his life.You felt something inside you crumble piece by piece. You should be scared, but at the moment, you don’t feel any fear. Instead, you were enraptured. 

You can feel your cheeks hurting from how wide your grin is. You don’t bother hiding it from him. 

“Can you send these to me?” You turn to him with the smile still plastered on your face, but he frowns at your question. 

“Those photos came from you.” 

You look back at his phone, your big smile reduced into a faint one that’s traced with melancholy. “I deleted them when I went to the US.” If he asks why, you wouldn’t know how to answer. Fortunately, he doesn’t. He gets his phone back from your hand and fiddles with it a bit. A few seconds later, you hear a notification from your own phone. When you open it, all the photos are sent to you. 

He looks at you warmly, his face devoid of anything but heartfelt fondness. “There. Like you never got rid of them.”

---

You lie on your bed with bottomless thoughts that night. Kuroo’s words weighed more than they should in your head as you stare at the photos. 

You deleted them to completely erase any trace of his existence in your life. Now they’re back in your phone with not a single photo missing from the stack. Ironically, it’s also you who asked for them back. Yet, you don’t mind. You came to accept that those memories existed. They happened. There’s no use trying to forget they did when he’s already back in your life anyways.

Looking at you and Kuroo in the images, you can’t avoid thinking how simple those times were. You were just two cool people who had sex for fun. You had no clue things would happen as they did - falling for him, leaving, and for some reason - destiny or whatever, meeting him again. The past you tried to leave behind crept up to you and there wasn’t anything you could do about it.

You thought you’ve moved on. You’ve thoroughly convinced yourself that you’ve disposed of all unnecessary emotions that involved Kuroo. You thought that whatever it is that you felt when you met him again was just remnants of yesterday. You were so wrong. That‘s just what you tried to tell yourself, repeating the idea over and over in your head until you believed it. 

But it never really happened. You haven’t forgotten about him. When you went on dates in the U.S., you’d remember him. So you stopped trying to see anyone and attributed that to being scared of getting hurt again. Hence, you shut yourself out to anyone until you no longer found dating to be interesting. You told yourself getting in a relationship would just get in the way of your career. 

That wasn’t true. 

The truth is just as he said. Your feelings for him are still there, you never did get rid of them. The question now is how to proceed from here.

You jerk when your phone rings right at your hand. 

‘Kuroo’

You don’t want to answer it. You basically just admitted to yourself that you’re still in love with him. Hearing his voice right now would be dangerous for your fragile heart.

But it might be something important. He doesn’t usually call.

You press the answer button. You were about to say hello, but your heart was beating so fast that you were unable to get any word out.

“Hello?”

You swallowed the lump in your throat so you could speak. “Yeah?”

“Is something wrong? You sound a bit off?” How he could tell even through a phone call is unbelievable. “Everything’s fine. Why’d you call anyways?” You do your best to sound normal. “Block your Thursday next week. I’m throwing a party.”

“What for?”

“Mmm. Just felt like having one.”

You minimize the call to check your calendar if you had any plans that day. “Alright. I have an event in the morning, but that night’s free.”

“Nice!!” He sounded a bit too glad. 

“Is that why you called?” It’s a bit suspicious that he rang you just for that. It’s just a party. He could’ve texted you instead. 

“Why? Am I not allowed to call when I want to?” Your heart skips a beat from the playful tone in his voice. You picture him smirking on his phone while he’s lying in bed. You bite your lip at the image in your head. 

Screw you and your stupid imagination. 

“Good night, Kuroo.” You said dismissively. It doesn’t seem like he’s going to say anything else important anyways. He chuckles from the other line before speaking so ever softly with tenderness that gives you butterflies in your stomach.

“Good night, kitten.” 

It was just a simple good night but you were reeling. You fight the smile that was forcing itself to form on your lips. You look at your photos one more time and sigh. 

You are so in love with him. 

On the other end, Kuroo is all smiles to himself. Nothing beats hearing your voice after a long day. Once again, he stares at the photo Mitsuki gave him that afternoon. He wishes it was real. He wishes you were smiling for him, laughing with him, and happy with him. If only you gave any indication that you like him more than a friend, he would’ve made his move. 

Even though he knows you still desire him, he wouldn’t settle for just sex. He doesn’t want a repeat of the past. He wants something further than that and more importantly, you deserve better than that. But so far, he could tell you were enjoying the friendship and companionship only. Even if he wanted to take things forward, he’s not sure that that’s what you want. You haven’t given anything away for him to make his move. He doesn’t want to risk it and have you running for the hills. 

Will he ever make you fall for him? Should he just leave things as is or do something bolder for you to realize that to him, you’re not just a friend?

He sighs. 

He’s so in love with you.

Part 6 | Part 8 |  m.list

taglist: @lia-faerie-queen​ @mkkhaikyuu @fastidious-and-precise @winunk @feelkindahorny @cece-lives-here @babythotshq​ @arendizzle​

[beomglocks]

colors ; k.th

part of the badlands series!

colors: “you’re ripped at every edge but you’re a masterpiece.”

based off halsey’s badlands album.

warnings and other: museum curator!taehyun, old money!y/n, mentions of depression and grass smoking, little bit of angst i guess??

taehyun sighed as he took down the 11th painting this week. the museum hadn't been very busy in the past couple of weeks, maybe because the weather was getting colder. one part of him figured that many people just wanted to be bundled up at home watching holiday themed movies and drinking warm drinks rather than appreciating enchanting artworks.

he couldn't fool himself though, he knew the truth. today's generation didn't care about the fine arts anymore. a shame, seeing as everything around them seemed to be inspired by it.

kang taehyun worked at his local museum. he had been offered the position by the owner one night while roaming the place. this should've been a red flag looking back. the owner seemed desperate for someone to fill in the position since the previous employee had left without notice. nonetheless, taehyun took the job and didn't regret it one bit.

open 24/7, the red haired boy was always working on the clock. not that there was much to do seeing as most of the people his age or even a bit older didn't hang around museums purely for the joy of it. actually, his only job was to exhibit the newly arrived collections, clean and dust them off, and conduct regular tours and workshops for the public. due to this and the fact that not many people even came by he would take regular breaks.

once in a while you'd see the occasional old person or art expertee roaming around the small museum. if you were lucky, you'd see the local edgy teens posing next to a piece they didn't understand just to get an aesthetic picture. taehyun would also have the unfortunate job of shooing them away or scolding them for getting just a bit too close.

recently his boss, who was the museum manager and maybe the only other person besides taehyun that worked there, had informed him that due to funds and unfortunate unforeseen events, the museum would be closing down in about a month from now. this caused taehyun to fall deep into a depression since this was his only job and he loved it here. the museum was like his second home. he found comfort in the silent images displayed throughout the building. they always told him a story and when new pieces came in he would sit and stare attentively at the new anecdote being told to him.

taehyun smiled sadly at the piece he had just taken down. it was a painting of 2 people kissing however both of their faces were covered by white cloths. this was his favorite and he didn't even have a clue as to why. probably because of the uncertainty of what the other was feeling or because of the fact that the other couldn't see each other's faces through the cloth, that would've made the kiss more exciting in his opinion.

he stepped out of the museum and into the frosty air of the outside world. it was only autumn so why was it so cold? he thought to himself. he discreetly pulled out a prerolled blunt and his white lighter from his pocket. he lit it and stuck in between his slightly chapped lips.

maybe smoking dope wasn't the healthiest thing in the world, especially for a boy so young, barely 19, but it helped taehyun get his mind off the inevitably of losing his job and being homeless for the winter. he shuttered at the thought. he would have to room with one of his friends, he sighed shaking his head. no, he didn't want to be a burden, yeonjun had helped him enough as it is.

he looked at his surroundings taking in the cold autumn afternoon. the trees had long lost their leaves and were bare. the sky was a murky gray color as if it were threatening to rain any time soon. he noticed a girl bundled up in winter clothes near the entrance of the building glance at him. he smiled at her and she jumped at the eye contact, thinking that he wouldn't catch her. taehyun chuckled as he watched her rush into the museum. "back to work," he said out loud to himself.

once the blunt had been almost gone, he smoked what was left of it and headed back into the empty museum. he was feeling light-headed, the effects of the blunt finally taking action, but taehyun was used to it so it barely affected him as much.

he made his way to the girl who was now starting to take off her jacket and scarf. taehyun tapped on the girl's shoulder to get her attention. "hi," he smiled at the girl, showing off his dazzling smile. "if you'd like, i could give you a tour of the museum." well what's left of it anyways, he thought to himself.

"oh...no thank you," said the girl. she smiled warmly at the worker. "well not to be invasive of your decision but it's sort of in my job description," taehyun replied as he rubbed the back of his neck. the girl sighed in defeat, "i guess i have no choice then."

taehyun laughed as he took her coat and scarf to hang up in the public closet, "yep, trust me. they say im not that bad of a tour guide, im quite fun to be around if i do say so myself. i promise not to bore you too much." the girl nodded, not entirely convinced. "if i do end up bored i will hold you accountable..." she took a moment to take a peek at taehyun's name tag, "kang taehyun," she joked.

as they walked through the museum the girl couldn't help but notice that it was fairly empty. "why are there almost no paintings in here?" she laughed hesitantly. "i thought this was a museum?" taehyun stopped walking, turning to her with a sad expression on his face.

"the museum is expected to close in about a month or so," he stated simply. "oh...that's terrible. may i ask why?" the girl responded. "my boss says we've run out of funds or something like that," taehyun chuckled bitterly. "people don't really give a shit about good art these days anyways."

"that's a shame..."

they continued to look through the various paintings that were still up and occasionally the girl would ask to see the ones that were taken down and left on the floor. it seemed the two were lost in each other's company as night started to approach.

"thank you for the tour of this lovely museum taehyun. it was fun but it's a shame such a nice museum like this is closing down," the girl said softly. taehyun nodded solemnly, he just wanted to get this day over with and crash at his apartment. he didn't blame the girl before him but talking to her reminded him of his harsh reality. a notification coming from the girl's bag made both of them jump as they were both lost in their thoughts.

"ah, that must be my father. he's kind of annoying when it comes to my curfew," she chuckled, digging her phone from her bag. taehyun watched her with a bored expression until his eyes reached her bag. he hadn't noticed this earlier but she had been carrying a louis vuitton bag. his eyes bulged at the expensive item that was so close to him, they got even larger when she fished out the latest iphone from it.

taehyun wasn't poor per se, he had just enough to get by since he was living paycheck to paycheck. however, he had never been in such close proximity to any luxury items. he suddenly felt weird being this close to this girl.

"what do you mean by curfew?" taehyun asks hesitantly. the girl sighs, "my father is one of south korea's richest chaebol's, maybe one of the big three at his point." she rolled her eyes as if this information was nothing. "he's super strict with me because i guess i'm just his show pony daughter whom he can show off to say he's a good father."

taehyun gulped, had he just been casually hanging out with the daughter of one of the richest men in korea? he felt sick at this. she looked up at taehyun's uneasy expression, "oh my god im sorry i just dumped that all on you! i just needed to catch a break so i came here, i didn't mean to drag you into my life story."

taehyun fixes his face, laughing nervously, "no- no its fine really. we all need a break sometimes right? im glad you got to have that time here." the girl smiled up at him, completely misreading his nervous laughter, "im glad i got to spend it here with you taehyun."

"oh before i go!" taehyun watched her pull out a checkbook from her bag and his stomach dropped. he silently watched her scribble some stuff onto the slip and tear it out, handing it to him.

"there's not too much i can take out of my account without my father flipping out but i hope this helps even just a little. whether it be in your personal life or with the museum."

taehyun eyes the check and chokes when he sees 50,000 dollars written neatly on the black line. he swears he can feel sweat going down his face like in the cartoons. "i- i cant possibly take this from you." he moves to hand the check back but the girl refuses to take it back. "taehyun, you love this museum with your entire being. i see the way to look at the paintings and the passion with which you explained them to me. i'd hate to see that taken away."

"plus, if you're gone who's gonna give me the tour when i come back?" she laughs as if this is something casual. taehyun's hands shake as he pockets the check, "i seriously cannot thank you enough...you don't know how much you just helped the museum and m-"

the girls phone dings again and she grumbles, "ugh why can't he just leave me alone. sorry but i think i really gotta go for real before he tracks my location or something crazy like that."

taehyun nods wistfully at the mention of her having to leave. he was really starting to enjoy her company.

"oh by the way," the girl giggles as she pulls her coat on hurriedly.  "was that you smoking weed at the corner of the museum earlier?" the girl chuckled to herself again just remembering it. taehyun furrowed his eyebrows, "why would you say that kind of thing at out loud and at my job?!" he scolded in a playful hushed voice.

"i just thought it was funny and you also smelled of weed the entire tour, i didn't mind though so don't worry," the girl concluded. she was starting to walk away towards out the door now. "i'll walk you out," taehyun offers. "such a helpful employee. is this in the job description too?" the girl jokes, turning to him while a smile on her lips. "well, not exactly," taehyun says smoothly.

she shakes her head, "i'll see you soon taehyun." he watches her walk off into the darkness of the night when he suddenly remembers something.

"hey what's your name by the way?" he shouts after the girl. for some reason taehyun really was hopeful of seeing her again.

"y/n!" came the disembodied voice of the girl he had just met.