#wonderingwhy

[zack-is-silly]

I just rewatched the music video for God Save Me But Don't Drown Me Out by YUNGBLUD for the first time in months and God I forgot how beautiful it is how much meaning is packed into a 5 minute video

The very first thing the video shows is a black screen that says "For anyone lying in their bedroom at 4am wonderingwhy they aren't good enough" then it cuts to the first scene which is his parents arguing about him. The next scene is his teacher yelling at him and the next is his girlfriend yelling at him.

It then shows him sitting in his bed with a note and a bottle of pills next to him. And then there's a teddy bear which holds up three papers the first one saying "R u ok?" The next one says "R those urs?" (Referring to the pills) the last one says "Wanna play out?"

The music starts and they go out on a walk. The bear is trying to cheer Dom up but they run into a three men (who I presume by the way the music video portrays them are people bulling Dom) the bear runs away and you think tagt he left Dom but he comes back with a bat to scare the bullies away. This is the first part in the music video Dom smiles. They go to a coffee shop where the bear helps Dom talk to the girl walking there and then the video winds back and where you should see the bear talking to the girl and scareing the bullies away you see Dom because the bear wasn't there.

Then it shows the three scenes from the start but Dom absolutely destroying the rooms. Then it shows Dom throwing the pills away.

The meaning in this music video is so fucking beautiful. I absolutely love YUNGBLUD. I have listened to his music for years and especially enjoyed his music in some of the worst points in my life.

The way his music makes me so fucking happy.

Anyways that was alot I kinda yapped a bit there and this probably won't be the only time I yap about YUNGBLUD and his music because I FUCKING LOVE IT

[mr-divabetic]

OUT GAY AND HERE so tell me what it meant to youin all your human glorythe fears, the chance, the honesty,the day you told your story.was shame the thing that kept you fromrevealing your true wants?were you afraid of hearingall the ridicule and taunts?or did you hold your head up,highdefying any doubt...and did you shout with confidenceI' m here, I'm gay, I'm OUT?!? did parents, friends, and foes alikerecoil in true disgust,or did your people smile and saywe thank you for,your trust?did you feel better having saidwhat some already knew,and were you now beginning toexplore a better "you"?is being out the best thingthat you've ever done so far?or were you left with wonderingwhy you are who you are? is life a bit more happy nowthat you have said the word?has anybody turned awayand left your voice unheard?have you been embraced bya community of peers?and have you now acknowledged that you're one of all the queers?you're here, you're out, you're satisfied.you're lesbian, you're gay.you're trans, you're bi, you're curious...but mostly, YOU'RE OK!! you've partnered with,you've broken up,you've shut your mouth,you've spoken up.you've bagged it up,you've not complained,you've used a whip,you've been restrained.you've doggy-styled,you've been on top,you've started it,you've made it stop.you've been alone,you've been in pairs,you've shaved it or,you've cut its hairs.you've used your tongue,you've used your hands,you've tied it upwith rubber bands.you've worked it in,you've done without,you've muzzled it, you've made it shout. but in the endyou've all declared...in voices loud and clear...this is who,you are and now...YOU'RE OUT AND GAY AND HERE!!!

[juhnkit]

Motivational Music in the Morning ... #TheRedClayStrays, #WonderingWhy [Official Lyric Video] (2022) #MMitM1

[ganaggi]

What’s Your Wish?

What’s your wish?

Doa dan harapan selalu diucapkan umat manusia dalam segala hal. Doa mengenai kesehatan, karir, financial, dan lainnya. Berharap mendapatkan hidup yang jauh lebih baik pun seringkali terlontar saat kita berdoa dan berserah pada Tuhan.

Emang bener ya, kalo berharap itu lebih baik kepada Tuhan, bukan orang lain. Tuhan ga mungkin ingkar, manusia bisa dipastikan hampir 100% ingkar. Entah itu orang tua lo, teman lo, atau bahkan pasangan lo sendiri.

Mereka bisa ingkar dengan segala macam alasan yang menurut mereka benar & wajar, tapi kita sebagai penerimanya, ga bakal berpandangan yang sama. Pernah dari kalian dibohongi? Sama siapa? Apa rasanya?

“Definitely yes!”, “Obviously hurts!”.

Okay. Terima kasih jawabannya.

Tapi gue ga munafik, gue pun pernah berbohong. In general way. Seperti, nyokap yang nanya balik jam berapa, kalo diajak pergi keluar & lagi males, kalo disuruh makan, dan sebagainya.

Gue ngerasa bohong tersebut masih wajar, karena ga melibatkan perasaan lo dan kepercayaan lo. Sekarang, apa rasanya kalo bohongnya itu melibatkan perasaan lo dan kepercayaan lo terhadap seseorang? Apa rasanya?

“Marah sih”, “Kecewa sih”, “Kok bisa ya?”.

Mungkin seperti itu atau bisa jadi ada jawaban lainnya.

Gue sadar betul, dibohongi itu ga enak. Apalagi yang melibatkan perasaan. Lebih bertanya-tanya, “Kenapa lo harus lakuin ini & apa motif lo? Kenapa sasarannya gue?”. Tapi, yaudahlah, hak si pembohong untuk menentukan motifnya dan targetnya. Kalau ditarik lagi keakarnya dan minta penjelasan, diam seribu bahasa bahkan menghilang. Such a coward! ‘Ya kan? Mungkin takut semua kebohongan yang ditutupi kebohongan lainnya terbongkar. Makanya menghilang.

Sekarang, gimana reaksi lo kalau ternyata lo menjalin hubungan yang ternyata orang ini sudah lama dengan pasangannya dan mau menikah? Apa rasanya? Tapi kasusnya lo baru tau dia udah punya pasangan saat lo ada konflik dengan dia. Apa rasanya?

“Dunia gue seakan runtuh sih!”, “Boleh lo bohong lagi aja, ga sih?”, “speechless” dan segala kemungkinan lain jawaban kalian.

Setelah sekian lama orang yang lo kenal dan berbagi macam cerita dan pengalaman hidup, ternyata bikin pengalaman buruk lo bertambah. Apalagi untuk lo yang punya trust issue, pasti ga enak banget mengalami itu semua.

Apakah lo akan menyesali pernah mengenal orang itu?

(Bagian ini, gue minta lo jawab sendiri dalam hati)

Menurut gue, ada banyak banget kemungkinan orang itu berbohong. Tapi mungkin yang sulit di terima adalah kenapa bohongnya harus dengan perasaan & kenapa lo pergi tanpa penjelasan. Walau jelas, maksudnya dia pergi tanpa penjelasan adalah “Udah ya, gue tinggalin. Bye!”. Tapi ga semua orang bisa menerima in that way. Call me ‘lebay’ or whatsoever but yes, people has their complicated feelings which totally different from one another.

Semoga kalian yang pernah dibohongi dalam bentuk apa pun, diberikan keikhlasan menerimanya. Semoga kalian yang ditinggal tanpa penjelasan, diberikan kemudahan dalam melupakan. Semoga kalian yang punya trust issue, tidak akan bertambah ketika bertemu orang baru. Semoga kalian yang pernah menemani pembohong, tidak dipertemukan dengan pembohong lainnya.

Cause we are not running in circle.

- @ganaggi

[accuratebodylanguage]

Forget the superficial. I’m an introvert, so I don’t do “small talk.” I prefer real interaction. Keep talking. I’m listening. And, I’m detecting and decoding your BODY language. I’m assessing whether your WORDS match up with your BODY. 

If so, then you’re credible. If not, then I’m wondering why… Keep talking; cuz I’m also diagnosing you. I’m determining if we’re in alignment and having a connection. 

A meaningful connection. Otherwise, Imma bounce and gone. . . . #forgetthesuperficial #dontdosmalltalk #smalltalk #realinteraction #keeptalking #Imlistening #bodylanguage #accuratebodylanguage #detectanddecode #areyoucredible #wonderingwhy #imdiagnosingyou #alignment #connection #meaningfulconnection #imgone #immabounce #introvertlife #introvertsunite #lifeofanintrovert #introverttip #introvertsenjoytheirowncompany #whatintrovertswant #introvertmindset #introverting #introvertlife #introvertlifestyle #INFJ #introvertscalling #enjoyourowncompany via @preview.app https://www.instagram.com/p/Cd9Bi6pJZ6z/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[eric-sadahire]

Ever walk into a room and completely forget why you were in there? Yeah, that’s why I’m no longer a fireman.

[healingmaria]

I just went back to black hair from blonde.

I feel like I'm a brand new me. I wish I didn't have to change—for you to accept me.

[risingsunresistance]

perfect handsome boy :]

[come-as-you-are-anytime]

forgiveness

I want to

give in

get lost

go down

I want to

find out

fill free

face up

I want to

finish here

and gather around

as forgiving

gives forth

for goodness 

is the greatest fore

and god not forbid

I give in and find out

that getting lost fills me free

to go down and face up

to forgiveness

[winterbl0ss0m]

these bots give us too much power

[mr-divabetic]

Out Gay & Here by Lorraine Brooks

OUT GAY AND HERE so tell me what it meant to youin all your human glorythe fears, the chance, the honesty,the day you told your story.was shame the thing that kept you fromrevealing your true wants?were you afraid of hearingall the ridicule and taunts?or did you hold your head up,highdefying any doubt...and did you shout with confidenceI' m here, I'm gay, I'm OUT?!? did parents, friends, and foes alikerecoil in true disgust,or did your people smile and saywe thank you for,your trust?did you feel better having saidwhat some already knew,and were you now beginning toexplore a better "you"?is being out the best thingthat you've ever done so far?or were you left with wonderingwhy you are who you are? is life a bit more happy nowthat you have said the word?has anybody turned awayand left your voice unheard?have you been embraced bya community of peers?and have you now acknowledged that you're one of all the queers?you're here, you're out, you're satisfied.you're lesbian, you're gay.you're trans, you're bi, you're curious...but mostly, YOU'RE OK!! you've partnered with,you've broken up,you've shut your mouth,you've spoken up.you've bagged it up,you've not complained,you've used a whip,you've been restrained.you've doggy-styled,you've been on top,you've started it,you've made it stop.you've been alone,you've been in pairs,you've shaved it or,you've cut its hairs.you've used your tongue,you've used your hands,you've tied it upwith rubber bands.you've worked it in,you've done without,you've muzzled it, you've made it shout. but in the endyou've all declared...in voices loud and clear...this is who,you are and now...YOU'RE OUT AND GAY AND HERE!!!

[zombiesama]

ANOTHER FREDERHYTHM

[radnotirradiated]

HAPPY - NF

Dear God, pleaseHear me out, I know it's been a couple yearsSince I've reachedOut and said hello, I bet you're wonderingWhy I keepObsessing on and stressing all the little thingsWhen I should beLiving life and soaking up the memoriesI know I've beenSelfish, I haveNo excuse to give you it's trueHanging by aThread's how I liveI don't know why butI feel more comfortableLivin' in my agonyWatching my self-esteemGo up in flames actingLike I don'tCare what anyone else thinksWhen I know truthfullyThat that's the furthest thingFrom how IFeel but I'm too proud to open up and ask yaTo pick me up and pull me out this hole I'm trapped inThe truth is, I need help, but I just can't imagineWho I'd be if I was happyYeah, been this way so long, it feels like something's offWhen I'm not depressedI got some issues that I won't addressI got some baggage I ain't opened yetI got some demons I should put to restI got some traumas that I can't forgetI got some phone calls I been avoidin'Some family members I don't really connect withSome things I said I wish I would of not let slipSome hurtful words that never should of left my lipsSome bridges burned, I'm not ready to rebuild yetSome insecurities I haven't dealt with, yesI'll be the first to admit that I'm a lonely soulAnd the last to admit I need a hand to holdLosing hopeHeaded down a dangerous roadStrange, I knowBut I feel most at home when I'mLivin' in my agonyWatching my self-esteemGo up in flames actingLike I don'tCare what anyone else thinksWhen I know truthfullyThat that's the furthest thingFrom how IFeel but I'm too proud to open up and ask yaTo pick me up and pull me out this hole I'm trapped inThe truth is, I need help, but I just can't imagineWho I'd be if I was happyDon't know what's around the bendDon't know what my future isBut I can't keep on livin' inLivin' in my agonyWatching my self-esteemGo up in flames actingLike I don'tCare what anyone else thinksWhen I know truthfullyThat that's the furthest thingFrom how IFeel but I'm too proud to open up and ask yaTo pick me up and pull me out this hole I'm trapped inThe truth is, I need help, but I just can't imagineWho I'd be if I was happyIf I was happyIf I was happy

[dragonfireridge]

I THOUGHT IT WAS A FERRET. I STOOD THERE FOR A SOLID TEN SECONDS WONDERINGWHY IN THE EVERLOVING RASPERRY BUSHES MY SNOOTY NEIGHBOR IS WALKING A FERRET.

[anincantationofstories]

 I Woke Up—Smiling By Ha Jin                          to L. Y.I was told that I was a sad man.Sadness is a fatal disease in this placewhere happiness is a key to success.If you are sad, you are doomed to fail—you can’t please your boss,your long face won’t attract customers,a few sighs are enoughto let your friends down. Yesterday afternoon I met Pham,a Vietnamese man who was once a general.He came to this countryafter nine years’ imprisonment.Now he works hard as a custodianand always avoidsmeeting his former soldiers here,because every one of themis doing better than he is.“Sadness,” he told me,“is a luxury for me.I have no time for it.If I feel sadI won’t be able to support my family.” His words filled me with shame,although I learned long agoa busy bee feels no sorrow.He made me realize I’m still a fortunate oneand ought to be happy and gratefulfor having food in my stomachand books to read. I returned home humming a cheerful tune.My wife smiled wonderingwhy I had suddenly become lighthearted.My son followed me, laughing and frolicking,while I was capering on the floor. Last nightI went to a party in my dream.Voices and laughter were drifting in a large hallthat was full of paintings and calligraphy.Strolling with easeI ran into the handwriting of yourshung in the airpiece by piece waving like wings.Dumbfounded, I turnedand saw you sitting on a chair,motionless, the same lean detached face,only your blue clothes had grown darker.Something snapped in my chestand my tears flowed.What’s the use of promising?I have promised, a hundred times,but never returned. Wherever we goour cause is the same:to make a living and raise children.If a poem arises, it’s merelyan accidental blessing. For several hours my heart ached,but I woke up—smiling.