#would definitely have woken up someone else in my house if i had. but yeah. i broke out of the sleep paralysis at 3:37am

[fingertipsmp3]

Had another sleep paralysis incident last night

[steddieas-shegoes]

Eddie doesn’t understand how his laundry always gets done.

When he first moved in with Wayne, laundry was his chore to do, so he did his and Wayne’s every Saturday for years.

Then Wayne started doing his own, and Eddie did his own. When he remembered. Which was usually only when he was staring at empty dresser drawers and stacks of dirty clothes on his floor.

But since spring break, since Vecna, since the hospital stay, someone has been doing his laundry.

He thought it was Wayne at first, probably just happy to have Eddie alive at home and not caring about having to do extra loads to keep his clothes clean.

But then Wayne went away for five days to fill in at a plant in Chicago, and his laundry still got washed and put away.

The only people who’d been at his house were Dustin (no way he was doing laundry without expecting something in return), Robin (did she even know how to do laundry?), and Steve (he wasn’t exactly the type to just do an acquaintance’s laundry).

So who was it?

Of course, he found out exactly who it was because his washing machine broke in the most comical way possible.

It was barely six in the morning on Saturday, and Eddie was woken up by a loud bang, a yelled “FUCK ME!”, and a surge of electricity. He would’ve been more angry about being woken up if he didn’t run right into Steve when he opened his bedroom door to see what was going on.

“Uh. Hi?”

“Do not ask questions. Do not. But your washing machine is broken.”

“Okay?”

“Is Wayne gonna be home soon?”

“Should be within the hour.”

“Good. Okay. Good. He can fix it. Your favorite Metallica shirt definitely can be saved.”

“What do you mean?”

“Uh. It’s eating the clothes? Or trying to. I think I got most of them but the Metallica shirt is really in there.”

“Wait.” Steve?! This whole time is was Steve Harrington doing his laundry? “It’s been you.”

“What?”

“Doing my laundry. I was starting to think it was a leprechaun or something.”

“That’s really stupid. How would a leprechaun even be able to reach the knobs to start the cycle?”

Eddie couldn’t help it, he laughed. Steve was being so serious.

“Oh god, I love you.”

Oh. Wait a second. No. Not that. That’s not what he meant.

Steve’s face was so red, Eddie could swear he felt heat coming off of it even from more than a foot away.

“Um.”

“Sorry. Just. Well I don’t have an explanation for that one.”

“I know you didn’t mean it, it’s okay.”

“Wait.” Eddie was going to make this worse. He had to stop. “I did mean it. I just didn’t mean to say it out loud.”

“You love me? You barely know me. I just broke your washing machine and possibly ruined your favorite Metallica shirt.”

“I know you. And those are replaceable things. You’ve been doing my laundry Steve. You’ve brought my favorite beer once a week for months. You let me host Hellfire at your house even though you’ve never played and probably never will. You make us cookies! You let me pick the music in the car. You let me pick movies for movie night even though I know you hate what I pick. You’re at my house before the sun is up washing my dirty clothes in secret so I don’t have to. What’s not to fuckin’ love?”

“I guess…everything else?”

Eddie shook his head. He grabbed Steve’s hand and led him to the washing machine, smirking at the pile of still-wet clothes sitting in the dryer next to it and the Metallica shirt hanging out of the washing machine.

“That washing machine is older than Wayne possibly. You got one at your house, right?”

“Uh. Yeah.”

“Great. Put my stuff in a basket and let’s go to yours.”

Steve kept doing Eddie’s laundry. Every Saturday morning before he had to go to work, he threw their clothes into the washing machine at his house.

Eddie always watched from on top of the machine, giving Steve a kiss on the forehead when he was done.

[alt-vera]

— fine tune ⁀➷

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joel miller get’s a call for help from someone unexpected. he check’s out more than her broken down car.

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♡ | joel miller | 2.7k | ❛ fine tune - miranda lambert ❜

warnings: dbf!joel miller. pre-outbreak. drinking and driving. underage drinking (americans). dry humping. oral (m! and f! receiving). throat fucking. fingering. truck/outdoor sex. unprotected piv. established age gap. mdni.

❝ you flipped a switch, hot wired my gears, yeah you put me in line, and now i’m running right ❞

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TWO IN THE MORNING WAS NOT THE IDEAL TIME FOR YOUR CAR TO BREAK DOWN.

　Pulled over on the side of a dirt road, slight hint of booze still coursing through your veins from the party you had just left, you knew you couldn’t call your dad. He’d kill you for even stepping close to your car after drinking, kill you for being out so late, kill you for waking him up in the middle of the night.

　You felt like you were out of options as you pressed your spinning head against the coolness of your steering wheel. Crickets chirped happily in the farm field beside you, unaware of the inner turmoil you were currently going through.

　You were definitely feeling worse than when you left the house party. You knew it was wrong to drink and drive, but it was summertime in the middle of a heatwave, and you were a dumb college kid. Your friend ditched you for a hookup and you had no other way home than your car, or else you’d be stuck sleeping on some random dude’s couch and would either get the wrong kind of attention from someone, or be puked on in the middle of the night.

　So, you took your chances.

　You couldn’t even call a tow truck, because they’d probably get the cops involved if they saw the state you were in. The longer you sat racking your brain, the more the booze soaked in. You were fucked.

　Then, it hit you. There was one person you could call that didn’t have parental dictation over you, and couldn’t give you proper shit for your bad decisions because he’d driven home after a six pack multiple times.

　Your fingers nervously picked at the seams on the leather steering wheel as the line rang. On the third ring, a groggy voice greeted you.

　“Joel?” You slurred. You ignored the taken aback way he said your name as he answered. “Joel, my car broke down. I can’t call my dad—Can you please come give me a jump?”

　Joel sighed on the other end of the line. Usually he’d be woken up by Tommy asking for a bail out of jail, but he never thought that when he’d be answering the phone this late it’d be you calling. In fact, he didn’t even think you had his number saved.

　“Where are you?” He asked gruffly after a beat of silence. You gave him the name of the random country road you were on, and with that he hung up.

　Joel was there within minutes.

　He sped the whole way there, praying no cops were out prowling and looking for someone to bring in to make their night a little bit more interesting.

　He pulled up a few feet behind your car, your figure popping out of the driver door to come meet him. The headlights of his truck shut off as he jumped out, white tee sticking to his biceps in the humid summer air.

　“Joel!” You cried, pace quickening. Your hands latched onto his forearms as he held you upright. “My car died—I think it’s the battery, or the engine, or something—“

　You reeked like alcohol. “Have you been drinking?” He asked.

　You avoided his gaze, eyes wild. “I…”

　You gulped, eyes slowly moving to meet his. “That’s… That’s why i couldn’t call my dad.”

　Your name came out as a sigh between his lips. You shifted more weight into him, “Please, Joel—Can you help me?”

　The neediness in your voice made his thoughts wander, but he mentally reprimanded himself, attempting to focus on the task at hand. He kept a hand on your arm as the two of you walked to your beat up car, opening the hood. Your eyes never left Joel’s face as he examined the contents of your vehicle.

　“Well, we’ll try jumping it,” He said, eyes shifting to you. “If that doesn’t work…”

　He didn’t finish his sentence. You really didn’t want to call a tow truck. College was already eating up your money.

　You trailed behind him as he walked to the bed of his truck, opening the tailgate and reaching for the jumper cables strewn lazily in the very back. Just as he reached for them he paused, instead turning to look at you.

　“You can’t be doing dangerous shit like this,” He said sternly, gaze hard with seriousness.

　Figuring that you were gonna be there for a hot minute, you jumped onto the tailgate, sitting down to rest your body. “Why? You do it all the time.”

　 “I bet you’ve even got a few drinks in your system right now,” You teased.

　“That’s different,” He sighed, hand coming to rub his face in annoyance. “I’m twice your weight and almost twice your age. My four shots is different from your four shots.”

　“Not really,” You shrugged. You leant closer to him, face coming dangerously close to his. “How many fingers am i holding up?”

　His eyes only left yours for a moment to glance at your hand.

　“Two.”

　You playfully rolled your eyes, drunken grin coming to dance along your lips as you pulled away ever-so-slightly. “Whatever, Miller. Just ‘cuz you have good eyes doesn’t mean you’re not half as buzzed as i am. I can still smell the whiskey on your breath; no age, or weight, can change that. And we both know how whiskey clouds your mind.”

　There was one time a few months ago where you had went swimming with Joel at a party your parents were having. He’d been a few whiskeys in, and you’d caught him staring at the way your chest sat perkily in your skimpy bikini top for a bit too long. He’d hopped out of the pool shortly afterwards, tugging at his swim shorts to presumably hide something going on down there. You hadn’t let him live it down since.

　Tired of your teasing, he inched his face closer to yours. His breath was hot against your cheek. “So, what?” He questioned, head cocking slightly and brow raising. “You wanna find out what happens when we’re both a few whiskey’s too deep?”

　You couldn’t hide your grin. “Aren’t you supposed to be jumping my car?”

　“Aren’t you supposed to be helping?” He retaliated.

　Next thing you knew, his lips were on yours.

　“How would your daddy feel about this?” Joel groaned between kisses, moving himself between your spread legs to be closer to you.

　“Who says he needs to know?” You pulled away, wrapping your hands in the white fabric of his tee. “You weren’t going to tell him you came out here tonight to help me, were you?”

　When Joel dodged your gaze and pressed his lips together into a line, your jaw dropped. You let go of his shirt, exclaiming, “Oh my god, you totally were!”

　“Joel Miller, i thought i could trust you! But, no, I guess—“ Your rambling was cut off by Joel’s large hand grabbing the nape of your neck.

　“Just shut up and kiss me.”

　You easily complied, melting into the kiss as his tongue slipped into your mouth. He slipped his hands in the back pockets of your cutoffs, grabbing your ass and pulling you closer until you were flush against him, tits pressing against his chest and cunt pressed against the bulge in his jeans.

　You groaned at the contact, rubbing yourself against him. You felt him smile into the kiss. “Isn’t someone an eager beaver.”

　“Never again say that when we’re making out. Ever.”

　“Again?” He questioned, his brow cocked. “Who says i’ll ever let you kiss me again?”

　“Let me kiss you?” You snorted, “More like let you kiss me. You’re the man in his late-thirties making out with a 20 year old.”

　He rolled his eyes. “Are you this feisty in bed?”

　Your grin turned devilish. “Only one way for you to find out.”

　You grinded against him again, and he let out a raspy groan, hands coming to rest on your hips as he rolled you against him repeatedly, coaxing you to an orgasm without even taking your pants off.

　“Didn’t know you were so talented, Miller,” You mumbled as you caught your breath, and Joel rolled his eyes, sliding your shorts down your shaking legs.

　“You don’t ever shut up, do you?”

　“There’s only two ways to shut me up,” Your teeth shone under the light of the moon as you grinned, “It’s up to you to figure ‘em out.”

　“I can think of one way,” Joel muttered as his fingers rubbed your clit through your panties, chucking them off soon enough and pulling you closer to him on the tailgate, knees lowering onto the coarse dirt of the road. His tongue poked and probed experimentally, finding your clit to kiss and suck on it, his actions being rewarded by gracefully moans leaving your swollen lips.

　“So sweet,” He cooed, and you felt your face flush.

　“God, Joel,” You called out as his fingers moved to enter inside of you while his muscle continued to lap at your clit, “Please, don’t stop—“

　Your pleads were cut off by your walls clenching around Joel’s digits as you came, struggling to stop your hips from bucking up against his face. He let you ride out your high, using him.

　“Well, you found one out,” You sighed, and you heard Joel chuckle.

　“I think i know the other,” He replied as he rose to kiss you. You could taste yourself on his tongue, a sweet tang mixed with whatever whiskey was still in his system.

　“You should’ve been a detective instead of a contractor, Miller,” You joked, sliding over to pat the worn plastic of the truck box beside you, “Now hop up, old man. I think it’s time you had a bit of fun.”

　He complied, hoisting himself up onto the tailgate beside you and sliding further into the roomy box. He let you lay him down, fingers dancing along his jeans as you nimbly unbuttoned them, pulling them down. You raised his shirt, signalling for him to take it off. Once he did so, you ran your tongue in a hasty line from his navel down his v-line to where the band of his boxers laid, a thin happy trail guiding your way.

　You heard him breathe out a shaky breath at your teases, and to toy with him more you pulled down his boxers painfully slow, taking your time to unsheathe him before taking his cock into your palm, pumping him as precum leaked from his tip and into your hand. You raised your palm to your face, tongue licking up the salty mess as your eyes met his own, blown wide with surprise and erratic lust.

　“Oh, darlin’,” He choked out, and you smiled, leaning down to press a soft kiss to the tip before your tongue moved down the vein on the side of his shaft, caressing him as you took him into your mouth.

　He hit the gummy side of your cheek and a deep sigh left him, the warmth melting his calloused attitude as you guided him down your throat, swallowing him as much as you could.

　“Baby, you’re doing so well,” He prided, fingers caressing your cheek as a suppressed cough vibrated through your throat. “Can i fuck that pretty throat of yours?”

　He felt you nod around him, and his hips began thrusting quickly, his dick hitting the back of your throat as he throat fucked you. When he felt himself getting close he pulled out, a trail of spit being left in his wake.

　You whined, causing Joel to laugh, running a hand through your hair. “Need to save myself to fuck you, darlin’. Wanna feel that pretty cunt‘a yours grippin’ me.”

　Your lips upturned at his praises, losing your shirt and turning so that you were on your hands and knees as Joel raised himself to meet your position, pumping his dick and dragging himself through your wetness before inching himself inside.

　You groaned, sinking yourself down so that you could meet his hips as he bottom out inside of you. A hiss left his lips, “You’re so tight, baby. Swallowin’ me whole.”

　You didn’t give him time to adjust to your warmth, wiggling your hips so that he’d get the hint. You heard a hearty chuckle rumble through his chest as he began thrusting inside of you, hand gripping your hips as you sank yourself down to meet his movements.

　Groans tumbled from both your lips as the summer air breezed through your bodies. His arm wrapped around your torso, pulling you up so that your back was against his chest. One arm stayed like that, fingers coming to twist as your pert nipples while the other trailed down to rub at your clit. The simultaneous actions guided you through another orgasm, hips stuttering and word’s incoherently leaving your lips.

　“Atta girl,” Joel praised, hips moving faster and more sloppy as he felt himself reaching his own peak. “So good for me, fuckin’ me so well.”

　You could have sworn there’d be bruises of his fingertips as his hand pulled away from your waist, his iron grip receding and making you cold from the loss of contact.

　You sighed, attempting to compose yourself after being fucked dumb. Your chest heaved with every breath, heart racing. You stole a glance at Joel, who tossed his tee at you as he began to pull his jeans up his legs. You graciously took it, suddenly realizing how exposed you were.

　Joel noticed your silence, the teasing air that usually surrounded you was replaced by a sullen aura, and he frowned. He pulled you into his bare chest, arms wrapping around you protectively.

　“You did so well, baby,” He cooed, pressing a kiss to your scalp.

　“Thanks,” You replied, small smile tugging at your lips as you looked up at him. “You weren’t too bad yourself, considering how long it’s probably been since you’ve gotten laid.”

　There it was. Joel secretly loved how you would pal around with him, even if he was the butt of your jokes.

　“It hasn’t been that long,” He replied with an eye roll, “Besides, you can’t deny that that was probably the best sex you’ve ever had.”

　You sighed, but the smile never left your lips. “Yeah, it was a much needed fine tune. Now that you’ve got me runnin’ right, do you think you could work on my car?”

　In all honesty, Joel had forgotten the whole reason he’d come out here in the first place. He nodded, slightly embarrassed, and walked briskly to the door of your car. The engine revved to life as soon as he turned the key, and he gave you a pointed look as you stood beside him.

　“You’ve gotta kiddin’ me,” You muttered. “I swear, my car just hates me.”

　“Yeah, well, it’s gonna hate you even more because you’re comin’ home with me. I’m not letting you get behind the wheel.”

　“Fine,” You breathed out, complying easily as you locked your car and hopped into the shotgun of Joel’s truck. “But you’re making me food when we get back to your place.”

　“Alright, alright,” He chuckled, hands tapping the wheel as he began to drive, “You’ve worked up quite the appetite, huh?”

　“Shut up,” You giggled, shoving his bare shoulder lightly. “Don’t think you’re all that just cuz you got into my pants.”

　“I didn’t even need to get into your pants, remember?” He retaliated, voice raising to mock yours. “I didn’t know you were so talented, Miller.”

　“I do not sound like that!” You squealed with a laugh. “We’ll see how well you do next time.”

　“You thinkin’ you need another jump soon?” He questioned with a knowing quirk of his brow.

　You gazed out the window, smile painting your lips. “Yup. Thinkin’ my car’s gonna need it’s engine looked at, and i hear your garage is open all hours of the night.”

[oliveisme533]

My dad’s neighbor is a dilf

Chapter 4

Joel Miller x You

Summery: You had decided to spend your summer in Austin with your dad. You used to spend almost every summer there, but hadn't spent a summer there since you were a teenager. Which means you hadn't seen a certain Joel Miller in years..

Warnings: abusive ex is back. Verbal abuse and physical violence (not against reader)

You roll over in your bed with a groan and stretch your arms. Grabbing your phone you check the time 10:03. Early for you. You decide to hop in the shower before your dad can ask you to help pick up fallen branches in the yard from last nights storm. You let the scolding water hit your body and you draw in a deep breath. Tomorrow was Monday which meant your dad would be back to work and you wouldn't have anyone to talk to or hang out with until 5 o'clock. Rinsing the soap from your face you contemplated just what to do with tomorrow, in fact you were beginning to wonder how to make use of your summer in general. The last couple weeks of doing nothing had been a much needed reprieve from your busy life, but you were starting to get a little stir crazy. You turned off the water, still deep in thought when you heard your phone buzzing. You tiptoed over to your bedside table and saw Joel's name lighting up the screen. "Why is he calling me?" You pick up the phone ...

Hello Hey sweetheart didn't wake ya did I? No no I've been up...for a few minutes (Joel chuckled) Well hey listen, one of my coworkers was looking for a sitter for tonight. He and the Misses are going out and their regular girl can't make it. Any interest in an easy job for the night? Oh yeah I can definitely do that. God know I've got nothing else going on. Okay I'll send you the info! Thanks darlin'

Obviously he wasn't calling just because he wanted to chat with you. It was a stupid thing to even hope for. The rest of the day went by relatively slowly, but when 6 o'clock rolled around you put some snacks in your back pack, a phone charger, and a book you had been trying to finish for several weeks now. The babysitting was easy. It was one kid, she was four years old and for the most part did whatever you asked. The parents told you they would be out late so when 11:45 rolled around you weren't surprised they hadn't come home yet. The house was quiet...too quiet. You never much liked this part of being a baby sitter. It was different when you did it for Sarah. The millers house was always warm and full of life. Those nights when Joel did get home a little later you felt safe curling up in on his couch with the TV on. Most of the times you would fall asleep like that and Joel would drive you home the next day after making you and Sarah breakfast. You smile at the memory. The sounds of the house settling are enough to snap you from this daydream down memory lane. "Fuck I really don't like this huge, quiet house. What if I call someone to keep me company. Dad will be asleep, so would mom and my sister. I bet Joel Miller is awake..." you stare at your phone and contemplate this next move. "Fuck it" you mutter and tape his name. The phone only rings a couple of times before you hear Joel's husky voice. A twinge of guilt shoots through you as you fear you've woken him up.

Hello? Everything okay? Hey, yeah I'm so sorry did I wake you? I was just restin' my eyes that's all. I ain't in bed yet. Well I just- I really don't like being in these houses all by myself. It sounds stupid but it's kinda scary I guess. 'S not stupid. You want someone to talk to-keep ya company? Yeah... and I figured you'd be awake still, but I guess I figured wrong You're all right honey, I really don't mind. I needed to get off this couch and sleep in my bed any how. But how 'bout you tell me about your day? My day was pretty boring honestly. I played with the cat, ate some ice cream and watched TV Wat'd ya watch? Love island What in the hell is that?

You laughed and proceeded to tell him all about the show. A little while passed and then you heard the lock click and knew the parents were home. You told Joel you had to go to which he responded "alright let me know when you get home safe. Can call me if you want." Back home you pondered whether or not you should call Joel. It was late and you were feeling tired, but you wanted to talk to him. After slipping into your pajamas you felt like you could hardly stay awake much longer, but you were determined to take advantage of this invitation from Joel to call him. So you tapped his name and watched the phone ring. You put it to your ear and your heart sank with each unanswered ring. When it went to voicemail you resolved that he had likely fallen asleep and you decided to do the same.

The next day you woke up early (ish) at 9:00. Your dad had already left for work. You roll over in your bed to check your phone and your heart pounds.

Missed call from Joel Miller 36m ago

You're hoping he's not at work yet and call him back quickly. "Hey sweetheart" he picks up within a few rings. "Sorry I missed your call last night. I ended up falling asleep and didn't hear the phone." It was so nice to hear his voice first thing in the morning. "Oh you don't need to apologize. I didn't really need anything, I just like talking to you" you could almost hear Joel grin as he said "well I like talkin' to you too sugar" you had walked down to your kitchen to put on a pot of coffee at this point when you say "hey why aren't you at work?" "Waitin for some parts to come in for this current job. Until they do there's nothin else I can really do. But the parts are supposed to be here by noon... so I'll get my ass to work in a couple hours" you notice a note taped to the fridge as Joel finishes saying all this. "I completely forget" you mutter to yourself, but apparently Joel hears. "What'd you forget?" "My dad left me a note reminding me that he's gone on a business trip and won't be back until Thursday." "Oh that's right. Your dad did mention that. Told me to keep an eye out for ya." "Did he really? "Yeah I mean you're going to be by yourself in that big house for almost 3 days" "I'm a grown ass woman though!" Joel chuckled. "No ones sayin you ain't, darlin. Dads worry and that don't change from when you're 5 or when you're 25" "I guess that's fair enough" you shrug. "I should get my day started here... might go on a run and catch up on laundry" "Well if you need anything the next couple of days just hollar" You hang up the phone with brief goodbyes and run your fingers through your tangled bed head. You groan as you massage your temple. "What the fuck am I doing?? I'm catching feelings for Joel fucking Miller. What's worse is that I'm flirting with him too"

Against your better judgement you decide to text Joel later in the day Hey what time you get off tonight? I should be wrapping up by 7...Why? You want to swing by for dinner? Nothing fancy. I'm just bored and I don't love being here alone in the evenings for long periods of time lol. Well I ain't gonna turn you down for some dinner. I'll see you at 7:30. Can I pick anything up at the store for ya on my way there? Well if you're offering... maybe some ice cream? And a bottle of rosè You got it

The rest of the day went by slowly. 7:30 couldn't get here fast enough. You were hoping for something to happen tonight with Joel, but you weren't sure what that would be. You hadn't decided if the lingering glances from him were just something you were imagining or actually happening. Around 6:30 you decide to hope in the shower and of course shave...because you never know right? After your shower you settle on wearing a simple, linen dress that's super comfortable and not all that fancy.  At exactly 7:30 you hear the doorbell ring. You jump off the sofa to answer it, your heart in your throat. But when you open the door, you're afraid you might be sick. It's not Joel Miller who stands there, but your toxic ex boyfriend ...Ben.

"What the fuck are you doing? You need to leave" Ben smirks. "Aren't you a delight. I just wanted to talk to you, and since you've block my number I had to take matters into my hands." Your heart was racing. Ben had never shown any physical violence against you, but you didn't know what he was capable and you didn't want to find out. "I thought I made myself really fucking clear that we are over" you said with a shaky voice. "Baby I just don't think you get to make that call. I mean I've done so much to make this relationship work. You can't just throw all that away. You know you're never going to find another guy who puts up with your shit." That was it. Something in you snapped. Something that had been brewing for literally years was about to come out. "No fuck you!" You shoved him in the chest with both palms and he stumbled back just a step, caught off guard by your motion. "Screw you! I don't need a guy to put up with anything about me, you asshole. You act like you're some fucking hero for tolerating the fact that I struggle with my mental health and stuff!" Ben was fuming now. You had never laid hands on him and you could tell the shove had lit something inside him too. "You have issues you know that?! You have fucking issues in your head!" He screamed at you getting up in your face and grabbing your arms tightly, pinning them to your sides. Out of the corner of your eye you saw Joel's truck coming down the street and pulling into your drive way. Ben was now shaking you and yelling "YOU'RE SUCH A BITCH.." he didn't get to finish his sentence because a firm hand grabbed him by the shoulder and yanked him backwards.

If looks could kill...you had never seen such an expression on Joel. He looked like he could tear Ben to pieces right then and there, yet he maintained a calm composure. "I suggest you get the fuck off this porch and don't come back, son" Joel said in a low voice. Ben scoffed. "Get out of here, old man. This ain't your business" Ben spat. "Son, we can do this the easy way or the hard way." Ben let his head fall back and let out a chuckle that sent a chill down your spine. "Is that so?" Without warning Ben threw a punch and Joel and narrowly missed "Ben!" You shrieked. Ben straightened up sent another punch. Joel grabbed his wrist, mid punch and yanked him in close. Joel towered over him. "Do not make me repeat myself again. I said get the fuck off this porch, or things will get ugly." At this Joel shoved Ben forcefully away, causing him to stumble backwards. Ben still looked angry, but now there was a hint of fear in his eyes too. He gave you one last glare and then jogged back to his car.

As soon as Ben's car sped off. Joel sun around. "Are you okay??" He asked, grabbing your face in his hands. "Um yeah" you managed to squeak. "I mean that fucking scared me tho." Joel looked like he might be sick. "I am so sorry wasn't here at 7:30. If I got here on time- " "Joel come on you don't need to do that. It's not like either of us had any idea Ben would show up here. I'm glad you came when you did though." Joel massaged the bridge of his nose. He looked stressed and was probably imaging what would have happened if he didn't show up at all. He shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut as if trying to rid himself of the notion. "Joel look at me I'm fine!" You said pulling his hand away from his face. Joel took your hand in his and stroked it with his thumb. "Okay" he said softly. "Did you get my ice cream?" You said trying to change the subject. A smile tugged at his mouth. "Yeah I did, baby"

You had made spaghetti for dinner, about one of the only dishes you were confident in preparing. You and Joel sat at the table in silence and you watched as he pushed his food around. "I'm sorry I'm not a chef...if you want we could just order a pizza?" You suggested. Joel looked up at you seemingly caught off guard. "No no no it's not that! The meal is delicious. I guess I just don't have an appetite. That's all." You pushed back from the table and the chair scraping against the hardwood made Joel jump slightly. "Baby I didn't mean to offend you it's just" you laughed as you reached for the shelf above the stove "Joel I'm not mad I'm just looking for something." Joel slowly walked towards where you were balancing on a stool trying to get the top door of the cabinet open. "Um...what's that?" You grunted as you finally got hold of what it was you were looking for. "My dad's red wine. It's gross too me, but he always says red wine gives you an appetite." You hopped off the stool and thrust the bottle into his chest. "Where's the wine you got me? I would like to get into that like asap." Before waiting for a response you went into the other room where the grocery bag still sat with the ice cream and wine and dug out the bottle. You hastily removed the top and began drinking. "Y/n...slow down what are you doing?" You removed the bottle from your lips and wiped your mouth. "What does it look like I'm doing?" Joel's face was laced with concern. "Okay that's enough. I'm calling your dad, you can stay at mine until he gets home. I'm sure he'll book the first flight back when he hears.." you didn't let Joel finish. He had tried to grab the bottle from your hands "no, fuck off I'm a grown woman. I don't need you calling me dad to tell on me or whatever." Joel placed both hands in his hair and squeezed his head "sweetheart you're clearly not okay! And for good reason... will you just let me help you? I'm worried about you. This shit wasn't in any of the parenting books I read before Sarah.." "you're not my dad!" "No no I'm not saying that I just" ... "is that all this is? You want to fill the void of not having your daughter at home this summer. So you come over here to parent me because my dad's not here? I don't fucking need that Joel I don't want you to see me that way."

...to be continued

[crazycurly-77]

Like an old married couple - Chapter 15

The next day brought good news for you. 

Doctor Wilson was content with your constant improvement and you felt a lot better than when you had woken up the first time. “Soooo since I'm feeling better and breathing is only hurting a little…can I go home?” you asked him hopefully and smirking. 

The doc pondered “hmmm….in the meantime you are out of danger and will definitely get well soon, but it still can get worse, if you are not cautious.”

“Pleeeeease! The people here are all very nice, but I want to be home again. I'm feeling more comfortable there” you pleaded with him. 

“Only under constant surveillance. Do you have someone there with you?”

“No” you answered disappointed and hung your head. 

When Gibbs was seeing your disappointment he suggested “she can stay with me. I can take care of her and I'm living not so far away from the hospital as she.”

Your head shot up and you looked at him intently wondering what he was getting at, but he concentrated on doctor Wilson asking “are there any precautions to attend to?”

The doc sighed in relief and nodded “I'm glad that you will be at her side furthermore. No, there are no precautions. The only thing is no stress, no commotion and no physical exertion.”

“Okay, no problem. I will see to that, be assured” Gibbs agreed. 

“Okay, thank you for doing this. It's a great relief for me. As I said, no trouble, just quiet and peace. And when her condition worsens come immediately to us” Wilson instructed. 

“Yeah, will see to that” Gibbs said. 

They shook hands and Wilson said bye to you both. 

While the two men talked with each other you looked at them, from one to the other and back. And you wondered. You heard what they said, but you didn't get it. 

Seemingly without having to think hard about it, Gibbs offered that you could live with him during your recovery and he would take care of you. They talked about precautions for you as if it was the most normal thing in the world. Neither of them had any objections. 

Who did the doc think Gibbs was? Your boyfriend? Your brother? Certainly he was not of the opinion that he was just a part time co-worker, wasn't he? In any case they were on the same page and content with their plan. But fact was, it was settled. In the next time you will be living with Gibbs in his house as though you two were a couple…oh my. 

Ohohohoh…oh shit. You felt that your cheeks and ears were burning at this thought. So you quickly tried to think of something else like…cute little dogs! Yeah, cute little puppys…

In this moment you noticed Gibbs standing very close to you and clearing his throat to get your attention. So you looked up at him and your eyes locked…and yes, he immediately had all of your attention on him and your cheeks and ears were burning again, but so much hotter than before. You sat on your bed and just stared at him, so embarrassing…and now you had to go home with him. Usually you were quite self-confident, but at this prospect you suddenly didn't know what to do and how to react. 

Before either of you could say anything Simon was walking smiling into the room. 

He always had timing. Gibbs turned immediately in his direction and positioned himself in front of you as if he had to defend you against something dangerous. Additionally he gave Simon his death glare. But cute Simon was going straight towards you and opened his mouth to greet you…until he looked at Gibbs. 

With a new bunch of flowers in his hands Simon took a step back and walked around the bed to bring some distance between Gibbs and himself. 

“Hey Y/N, are you going home? You are looking good! Can I help you? We are all missing you dearly” he babbled excited trying to ignore the danger. 

You smiled at him “thank you so much for the beautiful flowers! Yes, I'm allowed to go home!”

“That's wonderful! Maybe I can…”

“She's coming and living with me until she's completely recovered” Gibbs interrupted him. 

What the…?! You felt like watching a fight of some alpha men for something precious, not if you were allowed to go home or not. 

Simon were shyly looking at his feet “sooo, I have to go to the grocery store. If you need something, just call me.”

“Yeah, will do” you whispered to him and he stormed out of the room as if he was fleeing. 

“Grab your things and get dressed so we can leave” you heard from beside you. 

“Yessss” you said rolling your eyes. Seemed there were “wonderful” weeks ahead of you. 

As you were finished you tried to carry your suitcase, but Gibbs took it immediately from you without comment. He opened the door for you and led you out of the building. 

Arriving at his car he put the suitcase inside and opened the door for you, gentleman that he was. Once inside the car himself he took the driver's seat, started the car and called Tony “DiNozzo. I'm driving home and taking Y/N with me. She will be staying at mine until she's fully recovered. In the next few days I will be working from home to be able to help her. Call me if I'm needed.” With that he hung up. A typical Gibbsian phone call. 

You spent the ride almost entirely in silence. Only once the quiet were broken as you whispered after some time “you know, you don't have to do this.”

“Yes, I have to do this.”

“Why???”

You got no answer from him…he just drove in silence to his house.

(To be continued...)

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Here you will find the other chapters of this story and the other stories I've written to date.

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[shallowbreaths]

This is Mary Vincent, she is the biggest badass alive! At 15 she was attacked, brutal raped, hit in the head with a hammer, she had her arms hacked off with a hatchet, and was then thrown off a cliff by the side of the freeway to die. Her survival story is the shit! She says she heard a voice telling her to keep moving or else others would die, so without arms she managed to pack mud into the wounds so she wouldn’t bleed to death, and then she proceeded to scale the cliff with no arms!! She was completely naked, she had severe head trauma, no arms, and they say she had lost 50% of the blood in her body. After scaling the cliff (which she says took her most of a day), she then walked 3 miles before seeing a car with two men that slowed down, but after getting a good look at her they sped off. To which this badass woman said, “I looked terrifying, I don’t hold it against them at all.” Needless to say, she survived. Before allowing herself to even pass out though, she demanded a sketch artist and provided such detail that the monster’s friend saw it on the news and immediately knew it was him and turned him in. Then she testified against the man, and he somehow managed to whisper to her, “if it takes me the rest of my life I’m going to finish what I started.” Oh yeah, btw, it was HIM that released that detail!

Her family could only talk about how it effected them, it was as if they didn’t realize that it was effecting her too. So she was homeless for a while and she obviously had trouble making and maintaining any meaningful relationships. Her attacker got charged with a long list of crimes and got the maximum sentence at the time…. 14 years! He was released for good behavior after 8!!!!

He then tried to sue her after his release, (as one does after brutally raping someone and then cutting their arms off), but the court threw it out. He then moved to Florida where he was an “upstanding member of the community, and great neighbor.” His neighbors said things like, “of course we didn’t like what he’d done, but life goes on.” Yuck! I know this is shocking, but the asshole killed again and a witness saw it. The police arrived at his house and he was covered in blood still. He tried telling some BS story. The woman he killed (a mother of 3) wasn’t highly thought of because she was a sex worker, that’s one reason why they are so often killed, it’s easier to get away with. SOOOO, Florida asked Mary if she’d face the monster again in order to testify to the man’s nature. This badass said, “Hell yes” and flew down. I really hope she whispered to him, “I’m here to finish what I started.” He was convicted again and put on death row. Unfortunately, God got him with cancer before Florida got to finish his story.

This isn’t about him though, he was a disgusting creep that doesn’t deserve a name. This is about Mary fucking Vincent, the biggest badass of all time. Because of this story, there are now laws instituting mandatory life sentences for certain violent crimes. This is about a woman who uses her experience to help teenagers who are sexually assaulted, even though she STILL suffers from such terrible nightmares that she has woken up trying to escape with such violence that she has literally broken bones doing it several times. This is about the woman who went on to have two sons who she says gave a clear and definite reason to keep going. This is about a girl who at 15 says she couldn’t draw a straight line but grew up to be an artist with no arms, who fashions her own custom prosthetics in order to do the things she wants to do.

I’ve never met this woman, but she is one of my heroes! She is magnificent. Fuck that loser who wound up rotting in a cell alone, it could have been a car crash or a tree falling that caused that damage, he is a gross and barely necessary tool that lead to forging something truly amazing. What she has done, overcome, and made from the pieces is so fucking incredible that she should inspire us all. She was NOT disposable, but how easily she could have been. All she had to do was close her eyes at the bottom of that cliff and go to sleep. I’ll bet she could have quit on herself a million times over the years since 1978, but Mary Vincent doesn’t quit. She took the unimaginable and turned it into art. She IS art!

In Mary’s own words, “This is the third phase of my life since that awful day. I went from victim, to survivor, to artist.” Hell yeah you did Mary!

[obitv]

read on ao3 here!

coincidence is a funny thing.

you decide, arbitrarily, to go visit your friend, and it just so happens to be the last time you'll ever get to see him? the stats for that must by tiny. maybe you'd like to imagine there was some pull, some otherwordly feeling in your mind telling you now, now, go now! but... there wasn't. it's entirely possible you just would've woken up the next morning and your best friend would have left forever.

instead, it was a random impulse. one you by rights shouldn't have fallen for, simce there's good fucking reasons you weren't allowed see him anymore, but he'd stopped answering texts or calls and you were fucking worried goddamnit! you knew he blamed himself for dara getting hurt and all the attacks,and for scaring you guys so badly with his... powers, but you couldn't just let him waste away in his room isolating himself until someone decided it was safe enough to go outside again.

so. yeah, you broke into the wisp house. or more accurately, stood in william's yard throwing pebbles at his window til he texted you to say the backdoor was unlocked, and then snuck up to his room.

you... don't know ehat you were expecting. a mess, maybe? the bedroom of a teenage boy in a depressive slump? not bags. not a suitcase. not everything that makes william himself stripped from the walls and shelves and neatly packed away into labellef boxes. he'd even taken down all the polaroids.

"hey, will..? i was coming to check up on you, but... what is this?"

"it's- mary, i... i'm sorry. they didn't give me time, i have to leave tomorrow and i was going to write i swear-"

"where are you going?!" what the fuck? you'd know, if the wisp family were moving. of course you'd know, they've been the topic of so much talk lately that ANY rumours of them leaving would spread like wildfire. and nothing else in the house was packed, even in the dark you'd been able to tell that much. so why the fuck is william packing like he's moving out. he's 16, for fuck's sake!

"they're... sending me away. to a.. boarding school..?"

you didn't need to know him over a decade to hear the lie in his voice. he can tell, too, and puts down whatever he had been fiddling with to gesture at you.

"mary, look- it's not safe for me to stay here. it's not even safe to be talking to you. the.. recruiter is the first person i've talked to since my dad decuded to keep me inside and he only showed up this afternoon and- everyone... agrees. that it's the best option. for me to leave and go somewhere that people won't be in so much danger."

and as much as he tries to be vague, you can read between the fucking lines. someone fucking reported him, whether it be his parents or someone who saw the shit in the town square, and now the "heroes" are taking your best fucking friend away. and he wasn't allowed tell you.

if you were an angrier girl, you might've seen red at that instance. as it is, you close your eyes and breathe for a moment to make sure you don't yell and wake his parents.

"but you- you live here! your parents are here, your friends! you have school, we were gonna go to college! what about the crew, huh? what are we gonna do without our investigator?" you sound desperate, even to yourself, but you can't let yourself stop. even as you're saying it you know he's smarter than you, that he's definitely already thought of it all, but you can't stop. "what about cory? who's gonna sit with him at lunch and hype him up for his séances? or abby? c'mon, will, you KNOW she likes your shirts best. who's gonna help her when her camera breaks, or help her with her photography? dara, even? you still need to fucking talk to him, william!"

he looks like he's going to cry. a small, vindictive part of you is happy he looks as miserable about this as you.

"mary, they didn't give me a choice-"

"what about ME, will? who's gonna drag everyone along on our hiking trips? who's gonna joke with me in english, or stay up too lste playing dumb games? who'll stay up on call with me when we both can't sleep and tell me happy facts? you can't just fucking- disappear overnight like this! if i hadn't come over would i have ever seen you again? heroes die, william. don't try play at being one."

you're both crying, and he's flickering in out of tangibility and you know that's exactly why they're sending him off. you know you can't do jack shit about it and neither can he, and fighting isn't going to do anything but leave a bad taste in your mouth.

the last time you hugged him, you hadn't seen him in a week and thought he'd been dead. this time... isn't much different, really.

"sorry. sorry. i just. i don't wanna lose you, will. not again."

"yeah. i know. it's... a shitty situation."

"are you... allowed tell me? where you're going?"

he winces, and looks down at his shoes. fidgets with his sleeves a bit. "they haven't told me yet. just... getting training. from some people who really know what they're doing. i was planning to write, since they'd probably take my phone, and then you could have an address to write back to. i- do you- would you still want me to?"

moron. he forgets, sometimes, that you've stuck with him for so long and you aren't turning your back now. it hits you, then, what might be something you can do to help.

reaching for your phone, you pry the cover off and pull out the polaroid you've been keeping in there. especially with how little you've all seen eachother recently, it's been a comfort item you haven't let go of. you hold it out to him.

in your hand: a polaroid picture, of him and four others. it's from.. a week? two? before his incident, and the difference shows. he's happy, laughing and slinging his arm around your shoulders. you're nect to him, like always, your hair hanging down and anither big smile on your face. you're pretty sure the cardigan you've got on in it is one he bought you. on his other side cory's lurking, smile faint but visible and eyes shining. he isn't quite lookimg at the camera, maybe a little above it, but he still looks happier than usual. and again, behind him, dara stands, one hand on cory's shoulder like he's making sure he's still there. he's still in his football gear, smirking easily. and next to you, resting against your side, is abby. she looks breathless, from having to run back to your group before the timer went off, but maybe the happiest of the lot. she always loved when you guys got together for group pictures. all in all, it's one of the nicest pictures of your group ever taken, and it hurts to part with it. but you know he needs it more.

it's late. you need to go home -- you don't want to. you want to stay in this room, with your friend, until they drag him away from you kicking and screaming. but instead, you make sure he takes the picture, and you stare him dead in the eyes.

"promise me you'll make it back alive, william wisp. promise."

[struggling-with-time]

Does your father know? [Sapnap x reader]

Paring: Sapnap x Gender neutral!reader

Summary: A couple of nights out, that the local adults certainly aren't supposed to know about. But definitely does. And the things that happen at those parties. College AU SBI!reader.

Warnings: Fluff, so much fluff

Words: 4.6K

Masterlist: Sapnap's Masterlist - SBI Masterlist - Full Masterlist

A/N: This has been brewing in my head for days, so here it is. Please request if you feel like it. REQUESTS ARE OPEN. Request here.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

You are casually chatting along with Karl, and a very drunk Quackity. The music is loud in the house. You don’t remember whose parents own the house, it's more likely it's an involuntary frat house. But it sure isn’t a place you are used to coming to. You can spot Sapnap as he makes his way over to the three of you, and before you know it.

Sapnap pulls you along onto the dance floor, barely giving you time to put your drink down. You are already a good few drinks down and can’t help but feel like floating as he drags you along. A giggle passes your lips as you make your way into the dancefloor.

The music is loud, and while you have never heard this song before, you feel like you know the lyrics to it.

Sapnap places his hands on your hips as the two of you dance.

It’s nice, it’s fun.

It’s not what you are supposed to be doing.

Because as far as your family is aware, you are sleeping nice and soundly at home, and not out drinking and partying.

Well, most of your family, you could have sworn you saw your brother, Wilbur, in the crowd earlier. But what he doesn’t know. Won’t hurt him.

“Having fun tonight?” Sapnap’s voice breaks you away from your though. His face is suddenly a lot closer than before. His warm breath hitting your ear as he whispered. A grin works its way onto your own face.

“With you? Of course.”

It’s loud. It’s warm. It’s crowded.

Yet there is nowhere else you would want to be for the night.

Sapnap pulls away from your ear again, mouthing along to the song that’s playing. And the two of you dance, losing yourself to the crowd. Losing yourself to the music. Losing yourself to each other.

None of you have count on the number of songs that pass by. Each one seemingly bleeding into the next, and your energy never-ending. Your dancing ever the fun.

You can feel his hands as they glided over your body, seemingly exploring all of it. And you enjoy it, egging him on as you dance. You dance only for him. Matching your hips to the rhythm. Your eyes locked on his. His hands locked on you.

A cheeky wink from you timed to the music, is all Sapnap needs for him to pull you close against him once again. His lips ghost over your ear.

“You look great in blue.”

His touch goes from warm to hot, seemingly setting you ablaze. His lips trailing over your neck. Down to your shoulder. From your shoulder back to your neck. His teeth grazing over your neck lightly before he continues back up to your ear.

You can feel him whisper something to you, but you have lost most senses. Only able to focus on his touch. As his fingers grip you tighter.

He pulls his face back, and you lock eyes with him. A smirk is eminent on his face.

It’s clear to him, it’s clear to anyone taking a glance at you. He is driving you wild.

His left-hand leaves your side to cup your face. He pulls you in slowly, and you more than willingly follow along. His lips ghosting over yours once more. For a second, it’s just the two of you. Just for a second. But only for a second. Then the spell breaks.

“Fuck.” Sapnap mutters and pulls away. His hands letting go of you completely, and suddenly you are forced to stand on your own. You feel a bit disorientated at the sudden pull back to reality.

Sapnaps eyes are locked on something a bit behind you, a string of curse words seemingly leaving his mouth. You’re unsure if he’s muttering or talking. The music overpowering them either way.

You turn around to find what has brought him to pull away.

And there in the outskirt of the dancefloor stands a tall pink-haired guy, holding a brunette slumped against the pink guy. Or as you formerly know them, your older brothers Techno and Wilbur. They seem to be looking for someone, as Techno seems to be looking through the crowd that has assembled on the makeshift dancefloor.

Sapnap leans over to your ear once again.

“Does your dad know that you are out?” This time he’s yelling, no longer intimate or secretive whispers.

“No!” You yell back to him.

“Do you think they’re looking for you?”

Techno catches your eyes and raises a hand. Answering Sapnaps question for you.

You manoeuvred your way through the dancing crowd, leaving Sapnap alone. Approaching your brothers. You cast a glance back to where you stood, Sapnap already gone in the crowd. You try not to look disappointed, as you look back at your brother, but one raised eyebrow from Techno is enough to tell you, you failed to do so.

“Drunk?”

“Drunk.”

You sigh, as you guide Wilburs arm over your shoulder, and the three of you head into the night and down the street. A couple of minutes passes, and Wilbur starts to mumble about his big plans for the future.

You and Techno share a laugh at your brother's expense in the night. The inevitable scolding from Phil far away in the future.

It takes you exactly three weeks before you have done enough chores to get ungrounded. Although all three of you had snuck out in the middle of the night. You and Techno had been responsible enough to bring Wilbur home without trying to drive, and you had even woken Phil up yourself when you got home. Although you were pretty sure he had heard you from the moment you had stepped through the door. And Wilbur had decided that the hallway would be a perfectly good place to take a nap.

But that was three weeks ago, and now is now.

You have the clothes you want to wear in your backpack, along with your laptop and a physics book to make it believable.

While you don’t pride yourself on being a party animal, it doesn’t hurt to participate when invited. And especially not when Sapnap himself invites you.

“Bye Dad!” You yell out as you pass the kitchen. Phil sitting on his laptop, with Tommy beside him looking close to crying in frustration over homework, and Wilbur seemingly trying to cook something up. Keyword trying.

“Wait up!” Phil yells out, making you stop in your track. “Come in here.” You slowly backtrack your steps, making you stand in the doorway of the kitchen.

“Where are you going?” He squints his eyes at you, before looking you up and down. Tommy mouths ‘someone is in trouble’ to you. And you resist against, in all better judgement, to hit him.

Instead, you lift your backpack, “Study session at Karls, remember? I’m staying over for the night.”

Wilbur decides now is the perfect time to join the conversation, a playful look on his face. He knows exactly what’s going to be happening at Karls place tonight. Despite still being grounded, you know you will see him there later tonight.

“Study session huh? I thought you had study group on Wednesdays?” Wilbur brings a hand up to mimic a thinking position.

Fuck.

“I do!” Was that too quick? You look back at Phil, “I do.” You repeat yourself, “It’s just for my physics lecture, got a test on Monday.” Phil seems to not completely buy it. “Besides Dad, I am ungrounded after all, you said so yourself yesterday.”

Phil hums. “I did say that…” He looks you over once more. “Alright. At least let Techno or Wil drive you.”

That decision is easy enough for you.

“TECHNO! DAD SAYS YOU HAVE TO DRIVE ME!” You yell into the house. You swear you can hear your brother grumble about having to drive you from upstairs. But you elect to ignore it.

You look back over at Wilbur who is now discarding his apron in favour of getting out of the house. He knows if he can play his cards right, he can make Techno stop at the music store. And he might just be able to catch his totally secret girlfriend Sally for a couple of minutes. Not like he won’t be seeing her tonight.

You listen as Techno walks down the stairs. Now audibly complaining about being the only responsible driver in the house.

You would drive yourself, but having one car for four people to share isn’t exactly great. You tried having a driving plan once that you could put yourself on when you needed to borrow the car. It ended up with a month of Wilbur hogging the car. So now instead, you all just always drive each other around like soccer moms.

Techno looks annoyed at you as he passes the kitchen. But you know if he was truly annoyed he just wouldn’t have come down at all.

You turn to follow Techno into the hallway but are still able to overhear Phil questioning Wilbur on where he is going.

“To drive with them of course.”

“You’re still grounded.”

“C’mon Dad, Phil, Philza, it’s just a drive, it’s not like I would be seeing anyone.”

“Fine.” Despite not being able to see Phil, you know your dad is trying his best not to smile at Wilbur’s antics. “Just a drive. You probably need to get out of the house anyway.”

And that’s enough for him to end in the backseat of the car. Tagging along.

You automatically go for the AUX, as the designated DJ in the front seat. You barely get to press play, before Wilbur has started a conversation. A conversation that is closer to an interrogation.

“So Karl’s place to study, huh? Nothing to do with what’s going to happen tonight at all?”

“Oh please.” You turn your head to look back at Wilbur. “As if you won’t be there too.”

“Techno is gonna be there too!” Wilbur whines, as if it would make the situation any better.

“Wait, really?” You look over at Techno, turning forward in your seat once more.

“Yeah, Dream won at practice the other day.”

“How?” “You lost?” You and Wilbur speak at the same time.

“The guy put oil on my sword, so I dropped it.”

You snort, and Wilbur laughs. “So much for Techno Blade never loses.”

“Oh, shut up the two of you. At least I’m not grounded.”

“Hey!” Wilbur shouts.

The car ride passes with sibling banter, and a couple more jabs at each other before you are pulling up to Karls house. You quickly get out and yell a quick “See you later!” before heading over to the front door. You smile to yourself as you overhear Wilbur asking if they can stop by the music store as he changes from the back seat to the front seat.

You listen as the car pulls away, and you get to ring the doorbell.

A flustered Karl throws open the door. Loudly greeting you, before pulling you into a hug.

“You made it! I didn’t think you would, but then again Sapnap did invite you. But you did say no the other couple of times and-”

“I get it Karl, but I’m here now.” You smile at him, letting him breathe. He giggles. “Can I come in?”

“Oh yes! Of course! Of course! Come in.” Karl guides you into the living room, closing the door after you. You stand awkwardly in the doorway until Karl grabs your wrist and leads you over to the sofa telling you to sit down.

You kinda expected more people to be here. But instead, you are met with the familiar faces of Karl and yours friend group. Not to mention a couple of Wilburs friends. Not that the small town is big enough for everyone close in age to not already know each other. The community college isn't exactly helping either.

You can already feel tonight will have a different feeling than last time. Way more down to earth, and way more chill.

Quackity falls into the seat beside you and offers you a drink, which you happily take. “It’s nice to see you not all dressed up you know.” He tells you. Suddenly you’re happy you didn’t change at home, not that you had much of a choice.

“Yeah, it’s nice not to be all dressed up.” You say, taking a sip, as you eye your backpack that was placed against the wall in the living room.

“I hear both your brothers are gonna be here later. I can’t believe Phil just lets you guys go out. My mom thinks we are studying for English class.” Quackity complains. "I hate still living at home."

“Oh no, you have it all wrong, Phil doesn’t.” You laugh, a bit dry, but it is what it is. “He thinks I’m here for a study session for my physics lecture, Wilbur is still grounded for the last time the three of us was out, and Techno is only coming because he apparently lost to Dream at fencing practice.”

Quackity snorts, “Techno lost to Dream?”

“I know! That was my reaction too.” The two of you share a laugh.

“I can’t believe the Minecraft household is filled with degenerates.” He feigns a disappointed tone.

“You aren’t that much better.” Sapnap buts into your conversation. You hadn’t noticed him walking in. Quackity lifts his hands in defeat and gets up from the couch. Only for Sapnap to quickly takes his place.

“I’m guessing by that your dad doesn’t know about tonight either.” He teases you, and you look away for a moment, your purple drink suddenly very interesting.

“He does, sorta, not. He thinks we are here to study.” You give Sapnap a weak smile, and he chuckles at your antics.

You barely miss him muttering, “Cute.” Underneath his breath.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

And then silence falls upon the two of you. You want to keep him talking, of course, you do. How could you not want to? It’s Sapnap.

Every time he speaks, you want to cling to each word and hold it dearly. Instead, you flash him a smile, and he smiles back. Before looking away, and you can’t help but feel a bit defeated at that.

However, you are saved by Karl hooking up his phone to a speaker and way too loud music blasts into the living room.

It takes a good half-minute before the volume is lowered enough for it to be background music, and it takes even longer for anyone to agree on what playlist to be put on.

The afternoon bleeds into the late afternoon, and more people have decided to join. You now share the three-person couch with two more people, leading to you being pressed up again Sapnap. Not that you are complaining.

Wilbur and Sally have arrived too, already sitting on the floor together. Already - as your youngest brother Tommy would say - already sucking each other’s faces dry.

Techno seems to be the last person to join the gathering, bringing beer too. Of course, you can’t help but think. Of all the people he’s the only one of the three of you, that could ever make Phil buy any of you beer.

"Techno is the most responsible of you four."

"C'mon on dad! This isn't fair!"

"Exactly! I understand her, but daaaad we're both 20 why do you want to help him but not me?"

"Shut up Wilbur."

You are in a heated conversation with Karl about the right way to read document history. When you notice a touch on your left side. You stop midsentence, Karl doesn’t notice and keep arguing his side. But Sapnap does.

You can feel a pair of eyes on you, as you look down to see his hand around your waist. Neither of you have talked to each other since the quick conversation. Then Dream and George had each pulled up a chair nearby the couch and the three of them had talked since then.

Suddenly you get hit with the thought, that maybe, despite all better judgement, just maybe. What happened a couple of weeks ago wasn’t just because you were the nearest person. Just maybe it was because Sapnap actually looked your way.

You don’t let the thought get to your head too much, because the second you look at him. He’s back in his conversation with Dream and George about something you don’t really care about from the sounds of it. You shake your head; you must have been imagining stuff. He didn’t look at you.

You get two more drinks in you, as the evening passes on, and Sapnaps hand seems to find its way onto your thigh. You have no intention of getting drunk, but the feeling of Sapnaps hand on you seems near addicting.

It’s nearing midnight when a less than sober Dream suggests a game of Truth or Dare.

Techno complains against it as the only one, stating “We aren’t middle schoolers.”

So you play truth or dare.

The first couple of rounds starts innocently enough, the mood is good. Everyone is having fun. You are enjoying yourself, listening to embarrassing stories, to creating new ones alongside your friends. Finding yourself curling into Sapnaps side just a bit more.

He doesn’t protest or say anything against it, so you take it as a win, and keep leaning against him.

Then a drunk Quackity gets his turn and asks George for his worst hook-up. And the energy in the room changes. From then on the innocent truths and even more naïve dares are out the window. For stories about peoples experiences, and dares that seemingly gets riskier and riskier.

You manage to dodge most questions, keeping to the truth after that point on. Until you are unable to.

“Don’t be boring! Choose dare!” George eggs you on, and you give in. Anyone would give in, you swear the guy has pretty privilege. Most of the living room cheers.

“I have a good dare.” Dream says.

“Too bad it’s not your turn to ask then.” You stick your tongue out at him and turn your attention back to George. When you see the guy motioning for Dream to whisper his dare. “Betrayal George, I will never forgive you.”

“Too bad for you then.” His smile widening the longer Dream keeps whispering. Your worry starts to grow, you are already regretting deeply for giving in to the peer pressure.

Dream retreats and looks satisfied with his idea. George takes a moment to think it over, but it’s clear that he has already made up his mind.

“I dare you…” He clicks his tongue. “I dare you to give Sapnap a lap dance!”

“What?”

“You heard me!” George looks proud of himself, or his idea, or Dreams idea. You don’t know. Your stomach is seemingly doing backflips at the idea, while your head is spinning for the exact opposite reason.

“Chicken?” You try, you don’t notice the desperate look Sapnap is giving George.

“Nope,” George pops his ‘p’, “you’ve been boring all evening with only choosing truth. Besides we're all adults here, c'mon it could be a lot worse.”

You look over at Wilbur, who is more than occupied with Sally. Then over at Karl, who has a teasing grin on his lips, as if he knew this would happen. Then to Quackity, who looks like someone who definitely knew this would happen. Then to Techno, who looks like he could murder Dream. And knowing him, there is a 50/50 chance he’s still mad over losing or that it’s about the idea Dream just proposed.

“He didn’t say it had to be here,” Sapnap says to help you out. “We can just leave.” Your head pecks up at that. He’s right. George didn’t specify where. A smile forms on your face, a smile based on relief.

Dream starts to protest, but you have already grabbed Sapnaps wrist and started dragging him into Karls room.

You miss Techno slapping Dream over the head.

You make Sapnap sit on Karls bed, as you make sure the door is locked. You would rather die than anyone walk in on you. You look around for a speaker, and you barely get your phone out of your back pocket before Sapnap has put his hand on your wrist now.

“Hey, you don’t have to do it.”

You look at him, panic still evident in your eyes.

“What?”

“I said you don’t have to do it.”

“What?”

He smiles at you and tugs you over to sit beside him on the bed.

“For the third time, you don’t have to do it.”

His left-hand cups your head, his right hand has moved from your wrist and into your hand.

“It’s just a stupid game of truth or dare anyway. Techno is right, we aren’t middle schoolers. Fuck, we aren't even high schoolers.”

You smile at him, before letting out a quiet chuckle.

“Yeah, you’re right. I thought you would want that, though.”

Sapnap leans his head to the side. Asking you to continue.

“I mean, you’re Sapnap. Oh, c’mon on don’t make me say it.”

“Say what?” he grins at you now. The air suddenly becoming light around you.

“Please, don’t act like you don’t know. Everyone knows.” You look away for a moment, his hand lightly turns your head back to look at him, and you let him. Although the look you are met with is one of confusion and not the cockiness you were expecting.

You sigh once.

Then twice.

Then once more.

You were really about to do this, in the bedroom of your childhood friend. Jesus.

“Sapnap, seriously. This isn’t funny.”

“What? I feel like I lost the thread somewhere here.” His hand falls from your face, and you can’t help but want to chase it.

“I like you, everyone knows that. This isn’t funny. Seriously. Everyone knows I’m absolutely hopeless for thinking you would even look in my direction.”

You fall onto Karls bed, letting yourself sink into the purple bedsheets.

“Well, I can tell you two things.”

Sapnap falls onto the bed beside you. The two of you now staring into the wooden ceiling that’s decorated with glow in the dark stars.

“And what are those two things?”

“You see, one nobody thinks you are hopeless.” He chuckles a bit at that. “If anything, I’m the hopeless one here.”

You turn your head to look at him, and he does the same to you, giving you a kind smile.

“And now why would you be that?”

“Because two, not everyone knows that you like me, I didn’t.” You return his smile, although you feel a need to look away at the words, you keep eye contact with him.

“Well, now you know, making me right.” You tease or try to. You can feel the air has gone from light, to very heavy suddenly. Barely breathable. And you can feel your breath hitch in your throat, you know what words you hope he speaks next. But yet, you can’t stop expecting to get laughed at and rejected right here.

“I guess, but you see, I would say I’m the hopeless one here. Because I’ve been trying to tell you that I like you for months now.” He covers his face with a hand. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, I sound like a cliché.”

You let out a small laugh, “Yeah, you do a bit. But…”

“But…?” he asks, his hand still over his face, but you can see him peaking through his fingers.

“But I don’t mind it, I think it’s cute.” And now it’s his time to laugh.

Then slowly a silence falls over the two of you. Unlike the one from earlier, this one is saying more than a thousand words, while saying absolutely nothing at all. It’s just two people who like each other enjoying a moment.

“We should probably get back to the others again.” Sapnap breaks the silence, and you take a deep breath at the sudden disturbance.

“Oh yeah, the others.”

“The longer we stay here, the more they are going to wonder what we are doing.” You can’t help but laugh at that.

“You are sadly right Sapnap. You are unfortunately right.”

You groan as you sit back up, offering him a hand that he gladly takes, but instead of you helping to pull him up from the bed.

He pulls you down into his lap once more.

"However..." He starts, "They can wonder all they want."

You can feel his hands on your hips now. As he leans in to start trailing kisses over your neck once more.

Your breath hitches.

His teeth grace your shoulder before you can feel him sucking.

His hands exploring you as you lean into the pleasure.

You start squirming in his lap, and he stops.

"No."

You pause, as his hands quickly leave you.

"No?"

"I am not having my first time with you, with your brothers down the hallway, and my best friends absolutely listening in," Sapnap admits to you.

The statement makes your face heat up, and you try to hide away in his neck. He chuckles at the cute gesture.

"We should get going..." He trails off but makes no moves to actually get up. Just basking in the heat you apply to him.

You sigh, as you get off him, his hand now holding yours.

"Sadly you're right."

He gets off the bed and stands beside you.

However, when you prepare to let go, he keeps your hands entangled, and if you’re honest, you don’t mind all that much.

You unlock the door and head back into the living room. All conversation going stale the second the two of you stand in the doorway.

Dream ever the curious, is the one to break the ice. “Sooo…”

Sapnap lifts your entangled hands, and the room breaks into cheers. And you swore you heard a couple of people mutter finally. You hide your head in your hand, trying to hide your embarrassment alongside it.

Leading you to miss Karl throwing Quackity some money, and George doing the same to Dream.

You lift your head from your hand as you hear Wilbur speak.

“Good luck explaining that one to Dad.” Wilbur laughs, but a smile clear on his lips.

"What?" You say, as you can feel Wilburs eyes burning onto your throat. Your hand quickly coming up to try and cover the clearly evident mark.

A glance at Techno tells you that he too is happy for you, but even more clearly he is on the brink of smugness. Knowing you're going to get in trouble tomorrow.

He has been the one on the end of most of your seemingly endless rants about the moment that happened weeks ago at that party. The one that your brothers ruined, so it felt self-explanatory for them to be on the end of your whining.

Sapnap guides you, as the two of you return to your seats on the couch and the night continues.

Nothing has truly changed, yet it feels like everything has changed.

And somewhere along the night, things did change.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

[forever-rogue]

hellooo An idea crossed my mind and i cannot stop thinking about your great mind making it possible what abou din djarin and reader having a fight. Mando is very protective. He basically shows than reader cannot keep themselve safe. That bothers reader and they run away. Mando tries not to worry, but finally he is running through the rain at the night begging for pardon. Very angst and happy ending

AN | I am apparently back in my Din feels because this...made me soft 🥺

Warnings | None

Pairing | Din x GN!Reader

Masterlist | Din, Main

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

When Din woke up, it wasn’t because he was startled out of slumber by the little one, or an intruder - no. This was a much more pleasant way to wake up - to the smell of something delicious cooking. He rubbed his bleary eyes, almost as if making sure he was actually awake or just having a very realistic dream. Upon slowly sitting up and letting his feet hit the padded floor of the small bedroom, he discovered that it was all very much real.

A groan escaped his lips as he stretched and reached for a shirt to throw on before making his way down the kitchen. Despite having revealed his face to you, it seemed almost more intimate to reveal the rest of his body to you. Opening the door, half-expecting to see his green son, he was surprised to find nothing, but he did hear you in the kitchen.

Slowly shuffling his way down the hallway, a smile tugged on the corners of his mouth. You were so absorbed in what you were doing that you didn’t seem to hear him. He watched you for a moment, noticing that you had Grogu sitting at your feet, playing with one of his favorite little toys. You were cooking something, he wasn’t quite sure what it was, but it smelled delicious; he hadn’t even realized you’d have anything at the small refuge that could make something so delicious.

After a few moments, Grogu caught Din’s eye and cooed excitedly before slowly clambering over to him.

“What’s wrong?” you looked down at him, but he was quickly out of your sight, causing you to turn around and find Din watching you with a glimmer of amusement in his dark eyes, “oh! I didn’t even hear you - how long have you been up?”

“Not long,” he leaned down and scooped Grogu up in his arms before gently clutching him to his chest in a tender hug, "you've been busy...I didn't even know we had anything to make something that smells so...good."

"That's because we didn't," you admitted with a small sheepish little grin, "I got up early and went to the market to get stuff for all of our favorites!"

"You...what?!" his eyes widened in surprise as your blood froze in your veins. He definitely ….did not sound happy, "you went to the market by yourself?"

"Yes - but it was only for a little while this morning. All I did was get some food, I swear," you grew nervous as he took a step closer, "everything was fine! There’s no need to worry.”

“Did anyone follow you back?” he asked, trying to calm the seemingly millions of racing thoughts that suddenly sprung up. Din could tell that you were scared at his sudden shift in demeanor, but he was just so worried.

“No?” it was a small whimper that left your lips, “I don’t think so...why would someone follow me?”

“See, that’s what I mean-” he stopped himself, pinching the bridge of his nose as he sighed deeply. He wasn’t angry at you...it was just the worry and fear of not keeping you safe, “there are bad people hiding out in every corner of the galaxy. Even here, where it seems we’re safe for now. You can’t just trust people...if something had happened to you...I don’t know what I would do.”

“I just talked to the vendors, that’s all, I swear,” tears pricked at the back of your eyes as you backed up against the counter, “I can handle myself, at least for something so simple!”

“That’s just it, you can’t!” he’d never raised his voice like that against you and it was enough to just break you. A few tears rolled down your cheeks as you held back any comments, instead staring at the floor in silence, “it’s nothing against you. It’s just…”

“It’s fine,” you managed to choke out as you pushed past him to head back to your room. You didn’t even bother to turn off the stove or anything in your rush to get out. Din didn’t find it in himself to say anything as he watched you walk away. He hated himself in that moment for how he acted and had made you feel. He really did just want to keep you safe, that was his only intent, and yet he’d managed to even screw that up.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You dabbed at your eyes as you finished loading up your small pack. It was the dead of the night and you were desperately hoping that Din and Grogu were fast asleep so you could make a quiet exit.

You didn’t really want to leave, and you didn’t want to let go of either of them, but if Din really didn’t think you were capable of handling yourself for even such a menial task, then did he trust you at all? This was a dangerous life, and you’d known that from the very first day that you’d met Din. But here you were, still at his side. Maybe he’d never wanted you here anyway…maybe he was just being polite. Either way, from here on out, he wasn’t going to have to deal with you any longer. It felt heavy in your heart, but right now it seemed like the right decision.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The door creaked slightly as you shut it, and for a moment your heart almost stopped, sure that the bounty hunter would have heard it. After a few beats of silence when no sounds had met your ears, you decided that you were in the clear and headed out in the dark wood. It was a beautiful refuge during the day, but in the dead of night, it sent a shiver down your spine.

A few drops of rain left onto your face as you hugged, lugging your pack higher on your back. If you kept going through the night, by the morning you’d be at the transit depo and could make your way from this planet and away from your boys.

You turned around and cast a forlorn look back at the small house that had served as a home for a few months now. You'd come here for a much break from the hustle of real life; you'd never thought it would lead to this.

Deciding it was best to go, you'd let a long sigh before turning on your heel and walking away, listening to the soft crunch of gravel under your feet.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Din woke up with a start, waking up in the middle of an odd dream. His chest rose and fell rapidly as he tried to steady breathing, wiping the sweat from his brow. He couldn’t place it exactly, but something was off. He hastily pushed back the blankets as he scrambled out of the bed and over to the small makeshift crib where Grogu was. The little one was sleeping soundly as he snoozed away, undisturbed by anything.

Huffing lightly, he opened the door to his room and walked down the hallway, pausing in front of your door. It was shut completely - a sure sign that something was up; you’d normally always kept it open just a crack. With his hand poised on the door handle, he paused to listen for any sounds, but when he didn’t hear anything, he slowly opened the door, whispering your name.

He looked around the room, his heart dropping into stomach as he realized that you were gone. Instinct kicked in and he ran out of the room and back to his, hastily reaching for any clothes he could find. Din didn’t even bother to make sure anything looked good, but finished with his boots and a blaster, grabbing Grogu gently and placing him in his bag. The child made a few sounds of discontent as he was suddenly woken up, but he too immediately sensed that something was wrong.

“Sorry,” he patted the top of little fuzzy head before throwing open the door and practically running out. By now, it was raining completely and he cursed him for not bringing an umbrella; but in reality it was the least of his concerns. He was able to quickly spot one of your boot prints in mud, and found your path from there. If he had nothing else going for him, at least he still had well honed skills as a hunter, “let’s go. We don’t have any time to lose.”

Grogu just made a worried little sound in response.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

It felt like you had been walking for hours and you left no nearer your destination than when you had started. But you had to keep walking - turning back wasn’t an option anymore. You heard something in the distance behind you, causing you to freeze in fear. Swallowing thickly, you decided to carry on without looking behind you.

But after a few beats, you kept hearing the same sounds and...was that your name? The hairs on your arm stood on end as you were positive that someone was calling your name. Your heart left like it was going to burst out of your chest as you stopped and slowly turned around.

An explosion of butterflies rumbled through your tummy as you spotted Din coming out of the wood, drenched as you were by the rain. An unreadable expression was on his face as he rushed toward you, Grogu poking his head out of the pouch and grinning when he realized it was. Your stomach flipped a little at the sight of your two favorite people as they came towards you. You raised your hand in a small wave, but rooted your feet on the ground.

“I found you...you’re safe,” he was breathless as he stopped in front of you, a small, hesitant smile tugging on his features, “I woke up and you were gone…”

“Yeah,” you managed to choke out as you shrugged lightly, “I figured...it might be better this way, I dunno. You said I couldn’t even handle myself, so I figured it’d be easier if I just took myself out of the equation.”

“I shouldn’t have said what I did,” he admittedly without pausing for even a moment, “I didn’t mean how it came out, and I’m sorry. I do think you can handle yourself and whatever you need, I can teach you. I feel like bantha fodder for what I said. I’m sorry.”

“‘s okay,” you whispered softly, “I was just thinking that maybe...maybe this is better for you. If it was just you and the kid. That way you don’t have to worry about me.”

“I want to worry about you,” he promised, causing you to look at him with eyes, a nervous expression on your face, “I...want to keep you safe. Here, with us.”

“Y-you do?” you met his eyes, finding them just as nervous as he tried to gauge your response.

“Yeah,” he laughed nervously, trying not to completely spill his heart onto his sleeve then and there. No - that could be saved for later, somewhere much warmer and dryer, “I shouldn’t have just reacted the way I did. And even if you don’t forgive me, I am truly sorry. I just had to tell you.”

“I forgive you,” a shy smile met his as you took his outstretched hand in yours, “I shouldn’t have reacted so dramatically either. I could have saved both of us from getting this wet...I...thank you for coming back for me.”

“I always will,” he squeezed your hand gently, “I promise.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Pedro Character Taglist (strikethrough means I couldn’t tag you - please check your settings. Strikethroughs will get removed if not taggable)

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[vneuns]

half a heart

pairing : c!dream x gn!reader

warnings : angst? sort of

word count : 0.9k

a/n: i meant to publish this last night but i ended up falling asleep lmao

Dream stood silently in front of you as he watched you spill your heart out to him telling him what he was doing was wrong, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. There was too much joy in his manipulation. It was addicting, and he just couldn’t stop.

“Please listen to me.” Your cheeks were stained with tears and the beige cardigan was doing nothing to warm your cold body. “I’m listening to you Y/n but what you’re saying doesn’t interest me.” You sucked in a breath. Knowing he didn’t mean it.

Unless he did… No. No no no of course he didn’t mean it. This was Dream but not your Dream. You didn’t know when whoever this was in your boyfriend's body but all you knew was that you wanted him gone.

“I think you should go.” You whispered you whipped away at the water on your cheeks. Everything in you screaming to tell him that wasn’t what you wanted. You wanted him to talk to you. That’s all you wanted. All you’ve wanted for a while.

“Yeah I think that’s a good idea.” And with that he picked up his purple enchanted sword and left your shared home.

The second the door closed you had fallen to your knees the wall you had put up in front of your boyfriend now crumbling down leaving you a crying mess on the floor.

Never in the three years of your relationship with Dream did you ever have an argument so bad that he’d leave without apologizing, or without reassuring you he’d be back.

You were woken up by multiple harsh knocks on your door. You got up groggily yelling that you were coming.

Your eyes were bloohshot red, spending most of your night curled in a ball balling your eyes out whilst cuddling your boyfriends cold pillow that had smelled of him.

When you opened the door you were surprised to find Quackity on the opposite side with a distressed look on his face. “Hey quack what’s-.”

“It’s Dream. They locked him up last night.” Your eyebrows shot up in surprise and confusion. “Wha- for what?”

“They won’t tell us anything but I heard Sam talking to schallt about mind control or something.”

“Are they gonna kill him?” You whispered timidly nibbling at one of your knuckles, something you tended to do when you were stressed out. “I’m not too sure, but I’m gonna go tell the others are you going to be alright?” You nodded giving him a fake smile he couldn’t see through to put down his worries. “Okay I’ll be back later on.” Once the door was closed a raspy breath left your mouth, the tears forming just as they did the night before.

Of course you and everyone else knew about your boyfriends psychopathic tendencies, but you hadn’t realised how bad it had really gotten. Yeah maybe you were blinded by the fact that you had known the man for so long that the thought of him hurting other people never crossed your mind.

You leaned against your front door sliding down it as the tears came faster now, you realizing just how blind you had been this entire time.

-

A few weeks had passed and you hadn’t left your house at all for anything. Of course your friends would come by and check on you or bring you food, but it never worked. They'd always just end up finding you on your bed wearing or holding Dreams sweater like it was the end of the world.

And even after he was granted visitation rights you refused. You couldn’t bring yourself to push down the pain you were feeling to go visit someone who had been wanting to hurt people for so long.

All of his best friends would try and convince you to go, because he was “just as bad as you” but you ignored their attempts. As much as your heart was pleading with you to go visit the love of your life, your brain knew you wouldn’t last two seconds in the same room as him without breaking down.

That was until Phil visited. “I’m not going to visit him Phil I don’t care what you say, or do, I’m not going. I can’t” Your voice was muffled into your pillow hair disheavealed and you didn’t smell the best but no one pointed it out knowing it was most definitely not the time.

“I didn’t come here to talk about him, or force you to do anything. I came to talk about you.” He sat himself on the chair in the corner of your room that faced the bed.

“What about me? I’m an emotional mess because i was to blind to realize that my own boyfriend was a psychopathic manipulator that tried to brainwash everyone.”

“No, I don't want to know about the obvious.” He told you light heartedly.

“I want to know what’s going on inside that brain of yours.” Your eyebrows raised in surprise. You moved your head a bit so you could see him clearly out of one eye.

“I miss him, I miss him a lot.” Phil nodded waiting for you to continue. “But after that fight and him practically pushing me away, i just felt like self isolation would be best.”

The blonde man across from you nodded once again as he leaned back in the cushioned seat. “you need to go visit him.”

“I can’-.”

“you can and you will not if ands or buts about it Y/n.”

[hollandsmushroom]

Lost In My Brain

Hello everyone, so this concept came from the very very depths of my brain as I went into a deep dissociative episode and I wrote this to pull myself out by imagining semi mob tom comforting me. 

REBLOGS AND COMMENTS MUCHLY APPRECIATED 

Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: You aren’t replying to Tom’s texts so he is really worried, he finds you in a state of trauma and unable to really communicate. 

Warnings: Please read this at your own comfort, I wrote this to help me cope and I thought someone else might want to read it. I have written about extremely personal topics in this and I am not talking about stuff that I don’t know anything about, I suffer from dissociative PTSD. So warnings really include mentions of an unidentified trauma, Dissociation, Dissociative PTSD, Loss of recognition of faces, mentions of Mob Tom, missing person?, Trauma that happened at night, intrusive thoughts, thoughts that you are actually dead. 

Masterlist

Request Here

Word Count: 1577

Tom’s meetings had run late, he had messaged you throughout the discussions to keep you updated and so you wouldn’t worry but it was him who worried as his phone remained void of any response from you. He began to grow antsy as the conversations just dragged on. He gave his input whenever he had to but most of his time was spent trying his hardest to seem as if he was paying attention and then checking his phone to see if you had responded, and every time his phone screen was blank. His worry was beginning to overtake his body, he worked in a dangerous profession and people knew that the best way to get to him was through loved ones, you being the main one. The thought of something bad having happened to you made his heart break, the thought of someone hurting you added to that made his blood boil. It wasn’t like he was overreacting, you were always very attentive to responding to him when he was in meetings, you knew that under his hard mobster outside he worried about you a great deal and if you could do anything to ease that, you would, and that is why he was freaking out to this extent. As soon as the meeting came to a close he left immediately, ignoring the people who tried to catch his attention on his way out, focused only on getting home to you. 

  Tom walked into the house, calling out your name and receiving no response in turn his heart beginning to pound as the silence reverberated in his ears. With an urgency he began making his way through the rooms of your shared house. He started in your bedroom, eyes landing on the perfectly made bed, signalling to him that you never went to bed, he made his way through the guest rooms, your office, the living room, by the time he reached the kitchen he was on the verge of tears. Hands grabbing on to the counter as he faced the empty living room, retrieving his phone from his slacks pocket and quickly dialing up his mate Harrison. 

“Mate?” Tom asked as he heard the phone be answered on the other end of the line. 

“Yeah?” His friends tired voice answered, clearly having been woken up by Tom’s call

“I can’t find Y/n, I don’t know where she is” At this point Tom felt like he was on the verge of breaking down, the idea that something had happened to you and he wasn’t there to protect you made him see red.

“Wait? You can’t find her?” there was a rustle from the other line, Harrison having sat straight up in bed, shock over taking him. 

“Yeah, mate and I am kind of starting to freak-” Tom spun around, leaning his back against the cool marble countertop when his eyes caught on the open sliding glass door leading to your backyard, a dark figure sitting on the cement ground rocking slightly. 

“Mate, I'm gonna have to call you back” he ignored his friend's words of worry as he hung up, placing the glowing screen face down on the counter and making his way outside. As soon as he passed the threshold of the door sniffles reached his ears. The weather wasn’t freezing but it definitely wasn’t warm enough for you to be sitting there in nothing but one of Tom’s shirts, bare thighs on the cool ground. 

“Love?” Tom called as he made his way to your quivering figure, shoulders throwing themselves back and forth as you attempted to rock yourself in comfort. He reached a hand out to your shoulder, but you flinched away from his touch causing his heart to shatter. With the jerk of your movement his eyes caught your face, tears staining your cheeks. 

“Love it's me” Tom assured, once again reaching his hand out to you, and this time you let him, his hand soothing over your shoulder causing it to cease its shaking as you eased into his touch. He did this gradually, progressively enveloping you further into his hold, a protective embrace, your face tucked into his chest as his hand rubbed up and down your back, trying to warm your body as you began to shiver from the night air. 

“Let's get you inside, darling” Tom’s soothing touch helping you off the ground. He grabbed your hand, gently moving you into the house, and led you to the bathroom. His hands grabbed your hips, placing you onto the bathroom counter, you sat there, eyes trained on the wall ahead as Tom dampened a washcloth, moving back to you to wipe the snot and tears off of your cheeks, he stood in your view for the first time, his hands reaching towards you as you examined his face, causing you quickly push him away, hurt flashing across his unknown feature as you distanced yourself from him, scooting back on the counter curling further into your own body. 

“Y/n?” His voice sounded defeated, reaching out again only for you to have the same reaction. His voice, you knew his voice, and his face didn’t seem completely unknown, something about him was familiar. It was so close to the face you loved so much but your eyes were distorting his features.

“I...I don’t know who you are?” He could have sworn he broke when you said that. 

“Baby, it’s me, it’s Tom” he cooed, trying to understand what was happening, fear bruning through his chest and all the way down to his gut, feeling as if his world was slipping from under his feet. 

“No, I-I know it’s you but..but I look at your face I don’t recognize it, it’s off, it’s not quite right and I don’t know who you are, you look like I stared at you for too long and you lost all feature, Tommy, I don’t know who you are and I don’t know who I am” your tears began to flow again as you looked in the mirror, your face was just a little bit off till it wasn’t your face anymore. You closed your eyes and shook your head violently causing Tom to gasp, reaching out and grabbing your shoulders to halt your movements. 

“Stop, baby, please stop, it’s me, it’s Tommy, I’m right here” his voice soothed you, peeling your eyes back open, you saw his face, it was right, it was your Tommy. 

“Tom?” His name but a question on your tongue as he cupped your cheek. 

“Yes it’s me,” the pad of his thumb brushed away tear streaks. “What’s happening, sweets, talk to me please” he pleaded, eyes begging you to let him know what was happening. 

“I’m dead Tommy” you explained but it only made it worse, yes widening comically as fear shot through his body. 

“W-what do you mean you’re dead?” His mind was racing, had someone put a hit on you? Did you need to go into hiding? He felt like he was falling into every possible issue that you could be having but he was cut off by your voice again. 

“I was thinking earlier and what if I died that night? What if I didn’t get out of the way? This is the after life” you mumbled, fully convinced that you had lost your mind. 

“You are not dead” Tom demanded 

“How do you know that” you whispered 

“Because I’m here, dusting with you, I can touch you and trace every mark in your body, I have my own life, I would have that if you were dead, and if you were why would it just be a continuation of your day to day, why are you freaking out if this is heaven” he tried to explain and something must have worked because your body eased, eyes drawing from your hands to his face. 

“This is real?” your voice sounded weak, so lost in your mind as your eyes seemed to glaze over. 

“Yes,  love this is real” he hummed, finally being able to wipe the tears from your face, his touch drawing you back from the farthest depths of your brain that you kept spiraling into “Now let’s get you to bed” Reaching past you he grabbed your toothbrush and toothpaste, preparing it for you to brush your teeth. You took your toothbrush from his hand as he leaned in and kissed your forehead lovingly, a tear slipping from his eye as he took in your defeated state, brushing it away before you could see and brushing his teeth as well. 

Moments later you fell into your bed, Tom’s arms wrapped securely around you as your back curved into his chest, you shook your head as you closed your eyes seeing everything you wished you could forget. 

“Tommy, I feel so lost in my brain, its like its yelling and every new thought just adds to the noise, continuing to bounce around with everyone else” You whispered as you shuttered. 

“I know it's not okay, my love, but I am here and I will be here, I will help you come back” he kissed your temple and held you as you fell asleep. He vowed to himself that he would be there for you, he would never let you go, give you a life that distanced yourself from that pain that haunted you. He would remind you everyday that you are alive. 

[flightlessangelwings]

Keep You Safe

Frankie Morales x gn!reader (no y/n)

Word count: 3.9k

Warnings: fluff, pining, mild angst, a shitty ex, a break in, brief panic attack (not overly detailed), protective!Frankie, bed sharing, happy ending

Notes: This sat drafted for weeks cause I just kept picking at it and I think I’m finally happy with it so I hope y’all enjoy it! Thanks to my wonderful partner @we-can-be-himbos​ for beta reading for me!

~

The little dive bar was full of noise and life. You stood around a high top with your brother, Santiago, and your shared friends Will, Benny, and Frankie. Technically Santi was your step brother; your parents married when you both were young, but you two grew up together and he never treated you like anything other than a sibling. He was always very protective of you and always looked after you even well into adulthood. The two of you even lived together in a shared little house since he was away a lot for his job.

You all gathered together because it was Santiago’s last night before he left for his deployment. It was always tradition before any of the guys left to have a night out as a send off, and you loved when you and the boys all got together. You were fond of the Miller brothers, but you had a special place in your heart for Frankie Morales. 

Frankie captivated you ever since the day you first met all those years ago. You hid it as best you could, but you couldn’t help the way your eyes lingered on him for just a moment too long or the way your heart flipped in your chest whenever he laughed. And whenever you weren’t looking, Frankie’s eyes trailed down your figure as he shifted in his boots. He always smirked at your effortless charm that drew him in from the get-go.

There was an undeniable attraction between you and Frankie, and the rest of the guys could definitely sense it. Yet, no one said anything. Perhaps no one wanted to be the one to tell Santiago that you were interested in his best friend. Or maybe they wanted you and Frankie to come together on your own without more than a gentle nudge from the rest of the group. 

But what no one knew was that you and Frankie did hook up once. It was a couple of months ago after a night out at the bar, much like this one, and Frankie had offered to take you home. Santi had already left with a random person he had been making eyes at all night and trusted your safety with Frankie. One thing led to another and you ended up naked in his bed after several orgasms. The two of you agreed to never mention that night again, although it was always on your mind.

You had no idea that it was always on Frankie’s mind as well.

Glasses clinked as you and the boys all cheered to Santiago’s health and wished him luck on his mission. He would be gone for several months: the longest he would be away. You all chattered and laughed as you shared memories of good times. Benny let out a loud cackle and rested his hand on your shoulder as you told an embarrassing story about Santiago from your childhood and Frankie couldn’t help the way he frowned slightly. He wasn’t a jealous person, but he wished that he could be so casual in his touches with you as the others were.

“Hey Fish,” Santiago’s voice shook Frankie from his thoughts, “Can I talk to you for a second?”

Frankie nodded as he finished his beer before he followed Santi to a quiet corner of the bar.

You watched the two men walk away with furrowed brows, “What's that about?” you asked as you took a sip of your drink.

“I bet he’s telling Fish to make sure Benny keeps his hands off of you,” Will joked, which made you burst into laughter as Benny gave him an exaggerated pout.

Santi and Frankie looked to be deep in conversation and they both had serious looks on their faces. You didn’t bother to try to eavesdrop, since the bar was too loud and you settled for just watching their interaction from a distance. But you were soon distracted when you felt another pair of eyes on you. A chill ran down your spine as you casually leaned back and tried to find the source.

On the other end of the bar you swore you saw Casey, your ex. His face disappeared into the crowd before you could be sure, but even just the thought made you uneasy. Things did not end well with Casey; he was very overbearing and made you uncomfortable with how possessive he was. Even after you ended your relationship with him, you found that he would pop up sometimes whenever you were out like he was following you. 

You shuffled closer to Will and Benny as you rejoined the conversation and tried to put your ex’s face out of your mind. The boys didn’t seem to notice anything out of the ordinary and you convinced yourself that it was just your imagination as you put a soft smile back on your face.

The other two came back to the table within a few minutes, and you and Santi left the bar shortly after that. His flight was early the next morning and you wanted to get some sleep before you drove him to the airport. Even as you left with your brother, you still felt those ice cold eyes on you, but you didn’t say anything to Santiago.

Your little one story house you shared with your brother was cute and cozy, and was just enough for the two of you. You each had your own bedrooms and separate bathrooms, which was a must when you were house hunting. The car was quiet as he drove the two of you home, and though Santi usually pressed you about what was on your mind, he chose to stay quiet this time. 

“What time do we need to leave, Santi?” you asked though the wall as you got ready for bed.

“Six,” he shouted back.

Fuck, that was so early. But you always liked to be the one to take him to the airport whenever he left for assignments, so you sucked it up for one morning. You could always come right back home and go back to bed anyway. After you said your goodnights, you slipped into bed where you fell asleep quicker than you expected to with how full your head was.

But you didn’t stay asleep.

A loud bang at the front door jolted you awake and you scrambled out of bed to duck down onto the floor like your brother had taught you to. The noise must have woken Santiago up as well because you heard him shout your name as he told you to stay in your room. You heard an argument and you recognized the other voice anywhere: Casey. You gasped as you realized that was actually him at the bar and he must have followed you home.

You cracked your door open just enough to see into the living room where Santiago was locked in a heated argument with your ex. Panic raced through your veins as you fell back onto the floor. You didn’t even register that Santiago came back and was right in front of you. His hands were on your shoulders as he shook you gently to get you out of your head. It wasn’t until the third time he said your name that you came back to the present.

“Hey, hey,” Santi used as calming a voice as he could, “He’s gone.” He was just as frightened as you were, and he was ready to defend and protect you. Santi watched you in your relationship with him and he didn’t like the way the guy treated you at all. You were the only family he had left, and he would do anything for you, “You ok?”

You swallowed hard as you nodded weakly, “I’m ok,” you took in a big breath to steady yourself, “It was Casey wasn’t it?”

“Yeah,” he grit his teeth, clearly annoyed, “But you’re ok,” he pulled you in for a hug, “We’re ok,” Santi repeated.

You trembled but your brother’s embrace was calming, and the two of you stayed like that for several minutes, “I don’t think I can go back to sleep now.”

He let out a short laugh, “Me either,” he broke away to take a look at your face, “How about some coffee?”

“I don’t wanna stay here…” your voice was weak.

Santi nodded in understanding, “There’s a 24 hour diner, how about we load up the car and go there?”

Instead of leaving at six in the morning, you and your brother walked out of the door around 4:30. Santi tossed his bags in the backseat and offered to drive, but you insisted you could. You needed something to focus your mind. The two of you were the only ones at the diner save for the couple of workers, and you sat at the booth in silence for some time with a pot of coffee on the table between you.

“Go to Frankie’s,” Santi finally broke the silence. He desperately wanted to do something to help you, but he had no idea what.

“What?” you barely heard his voice, too lost in your thoughts.

“I don’t want you home alone after I leave,” he explained, “Go to Frankie’s for now and tell him what happened.”

You winced, you didn’t want to have to relive what happened in your head as you told the story to someone else. Even if it was Frankie. “Alright…”

“Hey,” he laid a hand on top of where yours laid on the table to get you to meet his gaze, “You know I’d stay if I could.”

“I know,” you sighed. You were quiet again for a moment before you changed the subject with a question that had been on your mind, “What did you say to Frankie at the bar last night?”

Santi grinned, “I asked him to take care of you while I’m gone. Because I know he will.” Frankie was the person that he trusted the most, and Santi could tell how much he cared about you. Frankie even confided in him how much he didn’t like Casey and how much he worried for you. If anyone would do anything to protect his family while he was gone, it was Frankie. 

You frowned, “He told you we slept together didn’t he?”

“Nope,” the shit-eating grin that came across Santi’s face was priceless as he leaned back in the booth, “But you just did.”

You sighed dramatically as you buried your face in your hands and collapsed onto the table, “Dammit Santi…” but you also couldn’t help but giggle when you heard his laughter. 

As the sun started to rise on the horizon, the two of you decided to leave for the airport. The talk with your brother and the several pots of coffee helped to ease your nerves, but you still fell quiet again as you drove. Usually, the car ride to the airport was full of chatter, but not today. And Santi hated that he had to leave right after something like this happened, but there was nothing he could do about it.

Santiago bid you goodbye with a tight embrace as you dropped him off at the terminal, and he made you promise to go to Frankie’s. You assured him that you would go straight there, even if it was still ungodly early in the morning. As you watched him walk through the doors and disappear into the small crowd, your heart fluttered as you thought about your next destination. 

It wasn’t that you meant to avoid Frankie since the night you slept with him. You just didn’t know what to do from there, so you only hung out with him in a group with the guys. Of course, you ended up spending most of your time talking to him anyway. There was just something about Frankie that you could not stay away from, no matter how hard you tried.

The sun shone brightly in the sky for how early it was as you drove over to Frankie’s house. You held your breath as you knocked at his door and hoped that he wouldn’t be mad that you woke him up. But, your breath caught in your throat when he answered the door in nothing but a pair of sweatpants that hung how on his hips. You had seen him naked before, but the sight before you literally knocked the wind out of you.

You temporarily forgot about everything that had plagued your mind for the past couple hours as you stood awestruck at Frankie’s front door. It took you several moments to even notice the grimace on his face as you obviously had woken him up.

But Frankie wasn’t mad; he could never be mad at you. He said your name to snap you out of your thoughts, and he couldn’t help the small chuckle at the way you looked at him. If he was honest with himself, Frankie would have liked to ask you out on an actual date after you two hooked up. But, you came up with the arrangement to keep your relationship under wraps for now before he could. 

“What are you doing here so early?” he asked in a groggy voice, “Everything alright?”

“I’m sorry, I know it’s early,” a heavy sigh escaped your lips as the memories of earlier this morning flooded back, “Can… Can I come in?”

Frankie stepped aside and extended an arm to lead you in, “Of course,” he couldn’t hide the concern in his voice. Obviously something was wrong, and he immediately worried about you. “Did something happen? Everything good with Pope?”

You bit your lip and nodded, “Yeah, he’s on his flight. He’s good,” you sat down on Frankie’s couch and you couldn’t bring yourself to look him in the eyes as he gently sat down next to you.

His eyes bore into your figure as he asked the silent question in concern for you. Frankie carefully placed a hand on your thigh and gave it a soft squeeze to get you to look at him. The way he looked at you made you melt, and you couldn’t hold it back anymore.

“Casey came by early this morning,” you blurted out, “And he and Santi got into it.”

“What?!” Frankie immediately went on high alert as questions poured from his mouth and he wrapped his arms around you without a second thought.

“I’m ok, I’m ok,” you reassured him as you leaned into his embrace, “Santi told him off.” You felt Frankie tighten his grip on you and you swore you heard a growl from deep in his throat, “I just… I don’t know what to do now.” Frankie was the one person you confided to about how nervous Casey made you, and how you thought you had seen him pop up whenever you were out.

“You can stay here,” he said without hesitation, “As long as you want.”

You let out a deep breath. Frankie only had one bedroom, so that either meant you would share a bed with him or you would be just a few feet away on the couch. Either way, you knew what staying the night with him would most likely lead to, and though you wanted that more than anything else in the world, you were hesitant. You weren’t even sure why you were; obviously your brother was more than ok with the idea of you and Frankie together. Maybe you were too afraid to face your own feelings for him.

“I don’t want to impose,” you finally said, “Besides, I hate feeling like I’m scared out of my own house.”

Frankie was quiet for several moments. You were stronger than you gave yourself credit for, and you were stubborn to boot. Then, he had an idea, “How about this,” he started, “I’ll take you to get a new security system and an extra deadbolt for your door,” he stared at your for a moment before he told you the last part of his plan, “And I’ll stay over with you tonight.”

You didn’t need much time before you agreed to his plan, and you spent the entire day with Frankie. He packed himself an overnight bag and followed you in his car to your house to drop it off before he drove you to the store. He could tell that you were still uneasy, so he made a fun day of it and treated you to lunch as well.

The stresses of earlier in the morning melted away the longer you were with Frankie, and you were happy that you went to him. You had always felt comfortable with Frankie, even from the day you first met. And Frankie felt a connection and attraction to you right away as well. He would do anything to protect you, and he cared about you more than he could express with words. 

By the evening, Frankie had installed the new security system and extra locks and you had cooked him a big dinner as a thank you. As the two of you talked for hours, you felt more and more relaxed and the events of earlier this morning were pushed to the back of your mind. That was, until it came time to head to sleep.

“I’ll take the couch,” Frankie offered.

You stood in the living room as you fiddled with your fingers nervously. You didn’t want him to have to sleep on the couch, and you spoke before your mind caught up to your mouth, “Stay with me.”

Frankie stood dumbfounded as he stared at you, “What?”

“You… You can stay in my room. With me,” the last two words were just a whisper as you dropped your gaze down to the floor, “Please?”

A soft grin came across Frankie’s face; he couldn’t say no to you, especially when you asked like that, “Ok,” his voice was just as hushed as yours. 

The tension could be cut with a knife as the two of you settled into your bed. Luckily, it was big enough to fit you both, and as you laid on your side with your back to him, you found that you wanted nothing more than to turn over and nuzzle into his arms. And Frankie had to wrap his arms around his torso to keep from reaching out to you.

You didn’t know how long you laid next to Frankie, but you were sure he wasn’t asleep yet. Without a word, you gave in to your feelings and you rolled over and wrapped your arms around his waist and nuzzled into his back. You heard him gasp softly as he tensed for a moment before he also turned over so he could wrap his arms around you. Frankie pulled you in as close as he could and held you tightly and you smiled into his skin as you rested your head on his chest.

Everything felt right like this, and you would have fallen asleep if it weren’t for the way his heart pounded in his chest. You shifted so that you could look up at him, and the movement made him open his eyes. The two of you stared into each other’s eyes for several long moments before you hauled yourself up slowly and inched closer and closer to his face.

Frankie’s eyes never left yours, except to glance down at your lips once for a brief moment. He breathed your name as he gripped onto you tighter, as if he was afraid to let you go. Your eyes darted down to his own lips for a second before you closed the rest of the gap and placed a tender, soft kiss. He sighed into the kiss and held you as tightly as he possibly could.

He was about to deepen the kiss when a loud crash made both of you jump in surprise. There was a rattle and pounding at your front door, and you immediately panicked. Frankie, however, was quick to jump into action.

“You're ok, You’re ok,” he cupped your face and softened his expression for a moment, “Stay here. Lock your door,” he ordered before he grabbed something from his overnight bag and darted out of your bedroom.

Your hands shook as you did as you were told and quickly locked your door and scrambled back to the floor next to your bed. The sounds were muffled, but you could hear a fight just outside the door. Tears filled your eyes as you hoped that Frankie was ok, and your heart beat rapidly in your chest as you thought about how he did not hesitate for a second to jump in and protect you.

Then, everything got quiet and all you could hear was the sound of footsteps running away. You strained to listen and crawled over halfway to your door. You heard the sound of footsteps followed by running water from the sink before Frankie’s voice rang through the door.

“Baby, it’s me. It’s ok,” his voice was surprisingly calm and soothing, and you immediately jumped up and ran to unlock your bedroom door.

Frankie met you on the other side and you wrapped your arms around him and hugged him tightly. Your shoulders shook as you sobbed into his chest, and you let out a deep breath when he hugged you back just as tightly.

“Shhh, it’s ok. You’re ok,” he stroked your back in a soothing manner as he buried his face in the crook of your neck, “I got you. You’re safe.”

“Frankie…” you breathed as you pulled back enough to look at his face, “Are you ok?” you cupped his cheek with one hand as you clung to his shirt with the other.

He smiled at you, “I’m fine,” he paused as he just gazed into your eyes, “He tried to get away, but your neighbor heard us fight and came out to keep him down,” Frankie kept a tight grip on you as he spoke, “Casey won’t bother you ever again. I promise.”

“Thank you, Frankie,” your voice was so quiet that you weren’t sure if he heard you as you dropped the hand that cupped his cheek down to his chest. You were silent again as you stayed securely in his arms, “Frankie I…”

He cut you off with a chaste kiss. Unlike when you kissed him in your bed, this one was more intense and full of passion. It was a desperate kiss, as if he used it to make sure you were actually here and ok. Frankie did not regret beating your ex up for you; he’d do anything to keep you safe. He kissed you for what felt like hours before he finally broke away for air.

“I know baby,” he murmured against your lips, “Me too,” he kissed you again, much more slowly this time. You weren’t going anywhere this time, and he had all the time in the world now to be with you. 

“Pope gonna be ok with this?” he asked with a laugh when he broke away again.

“I’ll handle my brother,” you joined in his laughter, “But he’s ok with it, trust me.”

Frankie gave you a look that said you had explaining to do later, but for now he just wanted to enjoy and relish the time with you and keep you safe in his arms.

[kissbentennyson]

Can I have Ben and Gwen try to tell Kevin that he matters, but he doesn't believe them until the reader convinces him??? Platonic with extra fluff, please.

I tried, it's probably a little fast though.

Better Off Gone

Platonic! Kevin x Sibling! Reader | There is no mention of the readers gender.

Friday, 11:30 pm

Finals week left you completely wiped out, on a normal friday you’d be up watching a movie or something- but god you were so tired. You had been knocked out for a few hours now because of some melatonin, totally not expecting to be woken up directly on the half hour by the sound of someone in the house. You look to your door, listening. It definitely wasn’t the ‘break in’ somebody in the house, it’s just Kevin. You feel a dull happiness, he’s seemingly always in danger, but at least you know he’s safe.

You shove your face back into the pillow, and the moment you close your eyes- you’re out.

Your phone rings echoing through your bedroom, startling you awake. Your eyes shoot open, blinded by the sudden light- It’s morning now? What the hell? Oh right, the phone. You take it off the charger, looking down at the screen to read the name. It’s Gwen, your brother’s girlfriend who you actually met through a shared elective class. You answer, letting out a groggy-

“Hello?”

“Hey-” She says your name with a sigh, and suddenly you are fully awake and worried- but you let her continue. “Last night Kevin, Ben, and I- we got into a small fight. He- he almost hurt himself for us… saying something about it- him not mattering. Ben and I- well, mostly I did my best to refute this but Kevin just… Left. Ben stopped me from going after him, because he probably needs space...” In your head, the dots connect. That's why he came here and not to his apartment- and why it was so late and so loud. “I was just wondering if he got home safe.”

You sit up, smoothing the top of your hair. “Yeah, he woke me up coming in last night- I'm surprised he didn’t go back to his place.” You can practically hear her life through the phone. You knew she really didn’t need this right now, she’s probably just as nervous- if not more- over finals and… literally everything else that comes along with her and her family's lives. “Great, i’ll be over to talk to him-” “Actually Gwen, I think it would probably be better if I went to talk to him. A new voice in the situation, new point of view, y’know?”

There was some obvious nervousness from her side, but you put in the cheeriest voice you could. “Just… rest, alright? I know that you need it. I can handle this, he’s my big brother- I’ll tell you how it goes, and if something goes south I'll call you to come over.” There’s still silence, but you give her the time to think it out. It takes a few minutes before you hear anything, and it’s a more relaxed “Okay.” You feel some of the sudden tensity in your shoulders loosen- but one thing pops up in your thoughts. And with no hesitation, you let it out.

“Gwen, you’re a really good friend, and a great fucking girlfriend to Kevin. Whatever you think is your fault or that you may have caused… it’s not. None of this is your fault or responsibility. You aren’t his keeper. You love him and you want him to be okay, and he will be. So will you.” There’s a wavery little sigh the moment you finish. “Thank you.”

-

A sweatshirt and shorts might not have been the best thing to wear out in the cold garage, but you didn’t feel like changing. You give a quick knowing before opening the door, suddenly greeted by the cold. It’s a little damp too, but you’ll blame that on last night’s rain. A chill shoots through your body like no other, but you press on. Kevin doesn’t look up from the engine, just keeps working. You casually stroll up like you normally would to bother him. He looks upset, but to be fair, he always does. He always is. Still not looking up, leaning in deeper even- he doesn’t let you speak first.

“Hey squirt, Just wake up?” You give a scoff, god you hate that nickname. “That obvious?” Taking a step back, you peer under the propped open hood to look at the engine… it doesn’t look like any you’ve ever seen. You weren’t a car person, but he was, so by obligation you knew a lot of information you didn’t care about. But, unfortunately you had the knowledge that Kevin had used some… ‘otherworldly’ tech to add upgrades to his car. “Somethin break?” For a split second, a smile quirks onto his face. “Nah, not on this engine. Just adding on.”

You nod, leaning up against a tool box that you often used as a bench. He didn’t really care too much when you did, at least you weren't on the car. You sit and watch him for a good minute, he pauses all of the sudden before speaking again. “Did Gwen send you out here?” Your lips press flat. Straight to the point, huh? You had no reason to not tell the truth.

“Not technically.” He finally looks over at you, one brow cocked. “Gwen called just to see if you got home safe. She was going to come over and talk to you herself- but I thought it would be better if I came to talk to you.” He turns back to his engine block, a quick dismissal of your presence. “Don’t bother, you’ve got nothin’ to do with it.” You straighten up. “Actually. I think I sorta do. You know this whole thing probably goes a lot deeper than you realize. Or care to admit.”

He turns back to you, now a little miffed. “What? You came out here to psy- psycho-” “Psychoanalyze you?” “Yeah, that.” You scoff. “Fuck no. I just don’t think- Will you just sit down and hold an actual conversation with me? No arguments. Please?” He holds an intense eye contact with you, as if he’s trying to intimidate you into leaving him alone. This might have worked on anyone else, but you’re his little sibling- you’ve dealt with so much worse from him at literally any other time. His brow is knit tight, like steel cables, and soon yours mirror his. “Kevin.” You channel your mom’s sternness, but a bitterness flows through. “If you don’t sit down and talk to me, I’ll put tampons in your fucking gas tank.”

His expression changes, putting down the tool in hand. As defensive as he is with his car, he knew you weren’t playing- and if you were to, he wouldn’t be able to do anything to get back at you. Ma’ would have his head for that. He leans his hip against the car, arms crossing. You take a deep breath before continuing to speak. “First. What exactly happened?” “What? Gwen didn’t tell you?” You could hear the irritation in his voice, but you couldn't care less. “Not any details. Just, what did you try to do?”

Kevin rolls his eyes. “We busted a weapons deal, some of my old buddies. They got away, but started a timer on a bomb big enough to level the whole building and then some. I tried to get Ben and Gwen out so that I could smash it and keep it from hurting other people. We stopped it and I guess it didn’t sit well with them.” A tightness in your chest formed, and you can feel the urge to cry swell up in your throat. “Why?”

“Because it was the quickest way, and-” he glances around, and you can't tell who he was checking for. “Look, i’m not stupid. I know that everyone- You, Ma, Harvey Ben, Gwen- everyone would be better off if i had just… stayed gone. I-” “That isn’t true!” it leaves you in a short and pained yell, rising from the tool box you were sitting on. Your voice drops to a calmer tone. “I can understand where you get that from Mom and Harvey- But your friends? Your Girlfriend?” You take a step forward.

“What is happening to make you feel this way? Has anyone said anything or done anything-” He stands up straight with a puffed chest, ready to defend himself. “Can you just drop it? It doesn’t matter and it’s nothing you’re a part of!” “Nothing I'm a part of? You’re my brother! I think I have a right to know and talk about my brother trying to blow himself up!”

You hadn’t meant to raise your voice like that at all, but Kevin didn’t know that. “And what? Your big idea to help is to come out here and start a fight with me?” he yells back. Your lips press flat as you swallow down the anger that's bubbling inside of you. It feels like your entire body is boiling with rage, but you can’t let this fall even deeper into a screaming match. Dropping your voice to a calmer tone. “I didn’t intend to start a fight, I'm still not. I’m sorry that I did, I wasn’t trying to aggravate you.” You rub your arm, shoulders dropping to make yourself look less defensive. “I’m just worried about you.”

He stares down at you for a second, then, some of his tension is released. “When are you not?” the side of his mouth quirks upwards just slightly. You let out a sigh of relief. “You know what, fair point. It’s hard not to though, it seems like you three are always on the brink of getting yourselves killed.” He closes the hood of the car, starting to put back all the tools he used. It's not like him to clean up much, but he can’t just leave it out. Ma’ll kill him if he leaves the garage a mess again. Unfortunately, you were home to hear that fight. Not pretty.

He picks up the smaller tool box and just lazily stacks it on the larger one you were just sitting on. Leaning against the bumper of his car, you fiddle with your thumbs. “Sorry for this but, I think your urge to take the brunt of everything is, like, subconscious. I don’t think you’re worthless, I don't think you you truly believe it either. Even though that's just what you continuously think.” He turns to you. “Huh- Hey! I thought you weren’t gonna do all that.”

“Look, it just… it just reminds me of when we were kids. Most of our family hates us, but I remember that your acting out got worse when… they started to project onto me too. You- you took the brunt of the hatred I’m just saying, maybe it’s just in your nature to protect the people you care about… Even though you’ve never liked me all that much. Actually, I never got to thank you for that.”

He’s silent for a few seconds, before smiling. “You talk too much sometimes.” He walks just past you, using one of his greasy hands to ruffle your hair. You hold back the initial reaction to groan, knowing damn well you’ll have to shower after this- despite having already showered last night. But you don’t. Kevin doesn’t hesitate to sit on the car hood with you, which is completely out of the ordinary- you’ve seen him do it, but every time you’ve tried he’s told you not to. You surely expected him to ream you.

“You’re not gonna, like, yell at me for sitting on the hood or…” He shrugs, throwing his arm over your shoulder. You tense up, Kevin had never been a super touchy sibling, unless you count all of the roughhousing you did as kids. You were always the more affectionate one. You always needed to be around someone, or holding someone’s hand- part of you was practically soaring with happiness, but the other was a little worried. Why would he suddenly want to, like, hug you- and be so lenient? But, you lean into it.

Mistake.

Suddenly, you’re jerked downwards, the knuckles of his opposing hand rubbing rough circles into your scalp. Laughing a little bit, slapping at his side a few times before he lets go. “Hey, jerk, that hurts!” You say, elbowing his ribs slightly, to which he gives you an elbow back. “Yeah, that's the point. And it doesn’t hurt as much as when you would bite me as kids.” You scoff. “You’re 6’3 and mostly muscle. It does hurt! Also, I never bit you!”

“Yes you did! You used to bite me when you were cuttin’ teeth then didn’t stop.” You press your lips flat, eyeing his arm and trying to bet if you could bite him now. Before you even move he reaches that arm back, turning the whole thing the same color greens as his car. “Don’t even think about it.” Puffing out your bottom lip a bit, you huff and cross your arms. “Whatever, you’re just lucky I can’t do what you can- yet.”

“Yeah, whatever you say, squirt.”

[writingsbychlo]

let it snow | joel dawson

word count; 20,746

summary; the night is made for doing things you probably shouldn’t do, and the mornings are for running away from them. except, for when you’re snowed in, and trapped with your problems for who knows how long.

notes; this is based vaguely on the movie ‘two night stand’, but very loosely, it does not follow much of the idea at all, just the basic outline. you absolutely do not have to have seen the movie to read this.

warnings; smut, reference to unprotected sex, very light (accidental) slut shaming, that’s about it.

It took you a moment to realise that you weren’t in your own bed when you woke up, startling a little as you came to the realisation. Your walls were not painted blue, and you definitely didn’t have a desk that messy pressed up underneath the window. In fact, your bedroom didn’t have a view like that at all, your bedroom window looked straight out into New York city, and the alleyways behind some dodgy fast-food restaurants.

This was a nice view, calmer roads and little houses, fields sprinkled with snow became visible the more you sat up, and you hadn't remembered it snowing this heavily last night. Sure, you’d been rather preoccupied, and okay, maybe it had been snowing a little bit, but this looked excessive. Although, it would explain the deep chill in the air right now.

You were still a little foggy, jumping slightly as hot breath washed over you from behind the bedding pulling as another body shuffled, and you were stiff all over. Then, it hit you. Reckless, a few drinks in with your happily loved up roommate and her boyfriend, who made you feel more and more painfully single every time you saw them, before you’d retreated to your bedroom, tipsy and secretly bitter, and checked some dating websites. A cute guy, some witty jokes, a funny conversation, and then him.

Everywhere, all at once, a quick train ride and some frantic kisses, your clothes being stripped from your body as that same mouth moved lower and lower, sweaty and hot and barely stopping to ask questions before you were waking up now, a little bit panicked and filled with ridiculous regret. Rubbing a hand over your eyes, you forced yourself to roll over, as calmly as you possibly could, to try and take in the sleeping man beside you.

Messy brown hair, the same shade as dark chocolate, your tongue tingling at the thought of the sweet treat as you liked your lips, resisting the urge to reach out and see if the stands were as soft as they looked. His face was half-hidden within the pillow, slumped down into it, but pale skin reflected little brown moles, his hair beginning to speckle with a light tracing of stubble, the tingle of which was now beginning to make itself known again between your thighs. Long eyelashes on closed lids hid his eyes from you, but you had a distinct memory of them, burned into your mind.

Warm pools of amber and gold, swirling browns that glittered in the low light that had taken over, like flickering candles and pools of caramel, a shade of whiskey that you wanted to be drunk on, beautiful and bright from all the times he’d looked at you. He was handsome, you couldn’t deny that, an odd surge of pride rushing through you as you congratulated yourself on at least being able to pick out somebody physically perfect to have a one-night stand with in your self-pitying loath.

The blankets were sitting around his middle, one hand stretched out a little towards your side of the bed, long and veiny fingers, and you remembered a little just why he’d driven you so wild now, those same veins making tracks up his forearms, disappearing just before his biceps. He was toned, but not overly so, the muscles along his chest standing out, a smattering of dark hair between them, and you could finally remember tracing the slight definition of abs with your tongue, before you’d been tracing something else, and your face flushed with heat as you remembered just how much of the man before you you’d seen.

It felt scandalous now, to be sharing abed with a stranger whom you could barely remember, and to know exactly what he looked like naked, or how he sounded while moaning as he came, but to not even know his last name, or to fully remember the address that you were even at. It was dirty, it was filthy, it was wrong. Oh, but it had been so fun, an experience that everybody should have at least once in their life, a naughty little secret, the one night stand you picked up at a bar, or through a friend, someone you’d look back on fondly once you were ten years older, married and settling down, and as you thought about it more, your lips were still flicking up in a smile.

You’d laugh about it one day.

Slipping from the covers, you tried to find your clothes, not wanting to linger any longer, not wanting the awkwardness of having to deal with stunted small-talk and forced politeness as you tried to adjust to the morning alongside him, someone who was still a little fuzzy in your mind, and your clothes were scattered around the room within easy access, a fortunate happening that made you thank whichever god or deity might be watching you right now.

Sipping your jeans back on, you wiggled a little, trying not to make the flooring creak underneath you, and only pausing long rough to put on your socks, shoes held in hand as you adjust your jumper on your body, a hand running through messy hair to tame it. The man shuffled, and you froze, watching as he paused for only a moment, before flipping over and away from the side you’d been sleeping on, a sleepy huff sounding from him, but he was still snoozing heavily, and you let out a little sigh. Your coat was hanging on the rack, and you grabbed that too, anticipating ho grateful you’d be to have it as you battled against the freezing cold that was surrounding you, toes chilling more and more against the concrete, but you didn’t want to wait much longer to leave.

A scrap of paper, a post-it note from the pad in the hall and a pen that barely had any ink left in, but you scribbled down a few quick words, pinning it up to the corkboard beside the door, and nodding to yourself as you deemed it good enough.

‘had a great time last night, thx.’

With a smiley face and a sign on your name to finish it off, you were undoing the catch across the door, the chain rattling slightly as it fell loose, and you winced, waiting to see if you’d woken him again, the studio apartment he resided within offering little in the way of walls and doors to muffle the muted noises of your escape. When you deemed it clear, your hand sealed around the door handle, clicking it open carefully, and pulling the door towards yourself.

So close, the corridor in sight, but the alarm beeped loudly, and you jumped, the computerised voice startling you so violently that your whole body jerked a little, and you went wide-eyed. You closed the door, hoping it would stop, but the beeping only intensified, and your heart raced in your chest.

“Shit!” Your voice was hissed out in a whisper, and you panicked, hearing the man in bed begin to stir a little, and in a last-minute bid to try and reclaim what little dignity you had left, not wanting to be caught sneaking out, you tore the note back down from the pin-board crinkling it slightly and tiptoeing back to the bedroom. Placing your shoes and coat down quietly as the man began to surface, and you tucked yourself back under the covers on the opposite side, pulling them up to your neck and faking a yawn as he pushed himself up with a groan, sleep broken.

He wandered away from you, your eyes diverting from his body a little bit as the covers fell away, and you were grateful to find that at some point he’d pulled his boxers back on, because you weren’t sure you could handle any more embarrassment this morning. The beeping came to a stop, a mechanic voice informing you that the alarm had been rest, and he was rubbing at his face and yawning as he wandered back through.

“False alarm.”  His voice was still raspy, filled with sleep and cracking a little.

“That’s so weird.” He only hummed in acknowledgement of your words, before he was shaking himself down, settling back into the bed and rolling onto his side, away from you as he fell right back into his slumber, and you sat up. “Bummer that it woke us up. I should probably get going anyway. I had fun, though!”

“Thanks, I think.” He was still half-asleep, barely processing your words, you picked at the sheets a little, trying to decide whether or not you were sufficiently polite enough to be able to leave yet.

“It was perfect for.. y’know.. what I needed. So, thanks, Joe.”

“Joel.” He mumbled, your brows furrowing as your legs swung over the edge of the bed, feet hitting the floor, and a loud creak sounded out under your sudden weight on the floorboards.

“What?” He huffed, deciding that sleep clearly wasn’t a luxury he was going to reclaim, and he pushed himself to sit up, pillows popped behind him.

“My name, it’s Joel.”

“What did I say?” Your fingers were doing up your laces, ignoring the burning heat of his gaze on you.

“Joe. My name has a little ‘L’ at the end. Joel.”

“Right, yeah, my bad.” You cringed a little, picking up your coat from the floor, and pulling it up your arms, an amused look on his face as he watched you.

“Did you sleep fully dressed?”

You looked down, shrugging a little and swallowing thickly as this got more and more awkward, and this wasn’t exactly how you’d pictured the morning after your first one night stand going. “I, uh, got cold.”

“Uh-huh.” You patted your hand at your sides, not sure what else to do, and he stretched his arms out, rolling his head from side to side, before looking at you again. “So, do you want to get some breakfast? Or do you normally just take off?”

“Normally?” He paused his stretching, looking up at you, a confused expression flicking across handsome features, and he made a vaguely confused noise, as though he didn’t know what he’d just spoken. “You said ‘normally’. Like, as if I do this so often that I’d have a normal and abnormal version of it.”

“That’s not what I meant. I have no idea how often you do this, I just thou-”

“I told you last night that this was my first time doing this, or even anything remotely like this!” You remembered that part clearly, because you choked a little on your words when telling him, and then he’d laughed breathlessly and kissed you, while pushing you back into his bed, and your face flushed as you remembered the exact moment, graphic detail almost disturbing.

“Yeah, but, c’mon.” You raised your brows at him, hands sitting on your hips as you stared at him, hoping your face portrayed the fact that you absolutely did not know. “(Y/N), c’mon. Do you really expect me to believe that this is your first one night stand, ever?”

“Yes! Because it is!” He stared at you blankly, before shrugging a little, seeming to accept it, but you were still feeling distinctly judged. “The only reason I’m even here is that my roommate and best friend had her boyfriend over, and I was feeling particularly lonely in the holidays, and they were, y’know, about to.. so, I had to do something, an-”

“No, yeah, you were sexiled, or whatever. I remember that. It’s just, surely this isn’t the first time your roommate has wanted to sleep with her boyfriend while you were home, so this can’t be the first time you’ve.. yeah.” He waved his hands, motioning between the two of you, and your arms crossed over your chest, glaring at him.

“I am sensing some distinctly judgy vibes coming from your side of the bed - which is odd, considering what we did took teamwork - and I haven’t even done anything worth judging!”

“There’s no judgy vibes coming from this side of the bed!” He laughed a little, shaking his head incredulously at you, and had your anger not been reaching its peak, you probably would have been a little more embarrassed. “Honestly, I really admire what you did. I wish more girls were that forward.”

“Forward?” You seethed, rolling your eyes at him. “There we go with that ‘slut’ thing again!”

“Wha- what ‘slut thing’? I’m not calling you a slut!” He moved now, standing up himself from the bed and you averted your eyes, letting him scoop up his shirt from the floor and tug it on over his head. “I’m calling you a girl, who went over to a stranger’s house at midnight. If only there was a word for that.”

“You know what, screw you!”

“That was a joke.” You stormed past him, hearing him chase after you with his own laughs as he tried to suppress them. “That was a joke! I’m sorry, bad timing.”

“You invited me here, just remember that!”

“That’s not quite how it happened, but it doesn’t matter.” He was biting at the inside of his cheek to contain his smile, fixing you with an amused gaze. “Look, why don’t we just have some breakfast? I make really good oatmeal, with a little smiley face made out of jam.” He almost had you, your resolve breaking just a little, before he was snickering to himself again. “And it’s not slutty at all.”

“Save your stupid oatmeal, I think I’m just going to take off.” You swung the door open, a bitter smile on your face as you looked back at him. “Thanks for having me, it was just awesome getting to know you. Have a great life, Joe.”

“Okay, cool, well, I’m just going to assume you did it on purpose that time, because I already told you a bunch of times that it’s Joel with an ‘L’.”

“It wasn’t, but don’t worry, you just have a stupid name!”

“Great.” He huffed, no amusement left in him as he stared at you with frustration. “Well, ‘bye! Lovely having sex with you!”

“Wish I could say the same!” You hissed, his jaw dropping a little, before his eyes were narrowing.

“Sounded like you had a pretty good time last night.”

“Don’t believe everything you hear.” You were prideful and mean, and you’d probably feel bad about it later but right now it was the only way you were getting through this disaster of a morning. “Especially when it’s something like ‘Hey, Joel - cool name.’ Like, what is that? Sounds like the first draft of a name!”

“Okay. Fuck you, (Y/N).”

“Fuck you, back!”

It was a weak ending to the argument, but you didn’t care, the door slamming behind you as you stormed away, quick to hold your coat closer to your body as the temperature between the apartment on the halls was radically different, your breath clouding in the air even from within the building, and you located the staircase.

It was only four floors up, the building being rather oddly constructed, only two apartments per floor, and it was unusually quiet behind all of the doors. When you finally reached the main entrance, remembering him coming downstairs to let you in last night, you undid the catch, your shoulder pushing against the fogged up glass as you made to leave, and a confused and slightly pained cry sounded from you as the door refused to budge even an inch.

You tried again, before you were wiping at the glass, to clear the condensation and try and see what the blockage was, but you quickly discovered it wasn’t fog but ice. Moving over to the window beside a door labelled ‘laundry’, you were met with the sight of snow piled up high, almost three feet up to reach the base of the window, and the roads weren’t even visible. You hadn't realised just how heavy the snow had gotten, and how bad the extent of it all was, until now, where you could see the

“Oh, no, no, no.” Panic flooded through your system as you realised just how screwed you were, trapped in a building with no way out, and your phone was dying, and you weren’t even sure whether your roommate would be up in time to come and find you and clear the snow before the battery died. “You have got to be fucking kidding me.”

Pulling up google, you were quick to check the news reports in the area, finding that the snow had increased and come down heavily overnight, it was a city-wide issue, and there was no way that they’d be getting anywhere near where you were for hours, if that. It was still snowing, albeit not as heavily, but they were prioritising inner-city roads and train lines, not little apartment blocks on the edges of cute fields and open space.

Of all the people you could choose to hook up with, you had to pick the person who was living in the most inconvenient location for a snowstorm.

Glancing around, you realised this was it, you were just going to have to hunker down for a few hours, and in all fairness, it could be worse. At least it was clean and smelled pleasant. Settling yourself down against the cool concrete flooring in the edge of the room, you stretched your legs out before yourself, daring to tap the ‘call’ button on your phone, and bringing it to your ear.

You waited, listening to it ring all the way until it went to voicemail, and then again, and again. After three times, and a whole 5% of what little battery life you had left remaining, you gave up on your roommate, knowing that if it were you at home, you’d be snuggled up cosy in your bed and still fast-asleep too. Switching the device off to conserve power, your head fell back, resting on the wall. Most wonderful time of the year, my ass.

“No, it was super fuckin’ weird. Totally fine, and then suddenly everything is a screaming match an-”

You cursed under your breath, the one voice you had wished you wouldn't have to hear again, followed by rhythmic bouncing of footsteps coming down the stairs, and you glanced up, offering a small wave to the person whom you’d hoped never to have to see again, and his brows furrowed, pausing where he was stood.

“I’m gonna’ have to call you back.” Tucking his phone into his pocket, he took the final few stairs slowly, coming to stand before you, and you pushed yourself up from the floor, brushing the dust from your pants. “What are you still doing here?”

“Blizzard. A whole bunch of snow piled up and now the door won’t open.”

He turned back to look at it, adjusting the basket in his arm before placing it down on the floor, and moving over to the door. Your arms crossed over your chest as he did, watching as he pushed the barred handle down, shoulder ramming into the door, and a grunt left him as it refused to move. He tried it again, before rubbing at his arm lightly, and moving away to peer out of the window just like you did, a little shocked at just how much it was, and you rolled your eyes at him. “I told you.”

“I was just trying to help, there was no need to be rude.” He muttered, and you scoffed once again, turning away from him as he picked the basket back up. He wandered away from you, into the laundry room, disappearing from sight, and you sat back down on the floor.

You heard him test the taps, water still coming through them miraculously, the metal and water within not having completely frozen over, and you brought your legs up to your chest, arms crossing over your knees and chin balancing atop them, preparing yourself for a long while of being bored. It was after many clicks and dials, the soft beeping of the machines as they rumbled to life, that you heard him appear once again, dirty Adidas scraping against the floor, before he came to a stop in front of you.

He looked at you for a minute, seeming to analyse whatever thoughts were going through his head, and you raised a single brow at him, prompting him to speak sooner rather than later. “You can come back upstairs, if you want.” You stared at him for a further minute, jaw dropping a little, and he tucked the laundry stock under his arm. “It’s going to be hours until those roads are cleared, even if they do unblock the doorway. You’ll freeze down here, and you haven’t eaten anything. I’ll make you some breakfast.”

He offered his hand, and sliding your palm against his, he pulled you up from your position on the floor, dropping your hand and spinning on his heel to guide you back up to his apartment. It was awkward, to say the least, and you rubbed your hands together to try and warm them back up, the chill in the air beginning to seep into your clothing and cool you to the core.

When the door opened back up, you let out a little groan, wishing you’d suppressed it better but being caught off guard, and you heard the man before you huff a laugh as your eyes scanned over the small space heater that was set up in the corner, warmth radiating from it and spreading across the apartment. Hanging your coat back up on the hooks by the door, you shuffled through the apartment, not too sure what you should be doing now that you’d returned to the scene of the crime from which you’d fled.

You chose to simply follow what Joel was doing, repeating his name like a mantra in your head so that you didn’t mess it up again, and taking a seat at the round table with a few mismatching chairs around it within his kitchen, watching as he clattered about with pots and pans at the stove. You busied yourself with your phone, finding that you at least had a signal, and could access your social media.

Instagram and snapchat were filled with videos and photographs of the snow, taken aesthetically from the windows, roofs and balconies of people who were lucky enough to be in their own homes, curled up with steaming mugs of tea and the loves of their lives to take pictures from behind frosted glass of the winter wonderland that was more like the bane of your existence.

You replied to a few texts, and messaged your friend again to update her, leaving it there for her to read whenever she came back around to consciousness, to tell her that she didn’t need to rush, and that you’d at least found yourself somewhere to keep warm and safe. Your head snapped up when a steaming bowl of oatmeal was paced down before you, smelling delicious with maple syrup and fruit, a spoon clattering down beside it before the scraping of the chair opposite you was ringing in your ears.

Poking at it, you couldn't help but notice the smiley face sitting on top, the syrup beginning to sink in as the blueberries scattered over the top were almost half-submerged, looking a little wonky but still adorable, and you looked up at the man who was already tucking into his own, finding him staring at his own meal in silence.

“Smiley face.”

Your voice cracked a little with your whispered words, but his eyes met yours, pausing only a second before the edges of his lips were flicking up in a gesture of a smile, and one shoulder rose and fell in a weak shrug. “Told you I would.”

You only nodded, spoon stirring at the contents of the dish, mixing it all together and the face on the porridge disappeared as you blended the flavours, before lifting a heaped spoonful to your mouth. Blowing on it carefully, you took the mouthful between your lips, this time successful in holding in your little sounds of appreciation as the food hit your tongue. It was delicious, you couldn't deny that, warm and satisfying as you tried to fight off the cold that was still threatening to creep in.

It wasn’t that you hadn't worn suitable clothing, but you’d only worn a camisole and jumper with a pair of leggings that were undoubtedly on the thinner side, because warm clothing hadn't been your main concern the night before when they were only going to be peeled from your body an hour or so later, discarded to the floor. Now, you were deeply regretting that decision.

You also hadn't realised how hungry you’d been, because the headache that had been forming, throbbing behind your eyes with a dull ache, was beginning to recede, the anger that had been dwelling within your system was fading, and you were allowing your mind to replace it with guilt instead. You’d been a little crass this morning, yelling and lashing out at Joel when it had been your fault that you felt like shit, succumbing to the sensual temptations of nightfall and your loneliness, and blaming your decisions on everyone else when the sun had risen.

“Look, we’re going to be here a while.” You jumped, spoon clanging against the edge of your dish, and Joel tried - and failed - to bite back his smirk at the amusement of having scared you out of your thoughts. “Why don’t we just pretend like last night never happened? Start over again? You can stay on one side of the apartment, I’ll stay on mine, we don’t even really have to interact. We’ll just coexist until the snow is cleared, and then we can part ways and never meet again. Sound cool?”

You let out a breathy sound of amusement, nodding your head as relief flooded your system. “Works for me. Clean slate?”

“Great.” He nodded, that flickering look of amusement passing over his face again, and he reached a hand out across the table. “Hey, I’m Joel. Your roommate for the next couple of hours.”

You paused, letting out a sigh as he arched his eyebrows in a silent question as to whether you were going to leave him hanging, before you accepted the outstretched hand and shook it. Giving him your name in return, he nodded his head, before he was standing up, and taking both of your bowls away to the sink, dumping them into the soapy water that he’d already prepared so that they could begin to soak.

Crossing your legs under the table, and your nails tapped for a second, silence filling the room for a few minutes, and you desperately searched for something to say that you could use to fill the silence. “Do you want to watch a movie?”

His voice sounded almost as strained as your own, but you let out a little sigh at the fact that at least he’d broken the tense silence between you both, and you hummed. “Yeah, that's good with me. Do you have a phone charger I can use?”

He turned to look at you over his shoulder, hands still submerged within the sink, but you waved the device at him as he took it in. “Yeah, I’ll grab it. You can go and pick a film; remote is around there somewhere. Pick something good.”

You were more than eager to get away from sitting idly at the table in awkward quiet and waiting for the hours to pass, each tortuous minute making you wish you’d just remained downstairs alone, slowly freezing into a statue. The couch was large and plush, slightly worn seats but it only made it look more inviting, a plethora of cushions and pillows laid out for you to settle into, and just as he’d said, the controls were already out on the coffee table, a few coasters and random pieces of stationary covering the surface too.

Switching the television on, you waited for it to boot up, finding that he had netflix downloaded, and there was a list of films in the back of your mind that you’d been waiting to watch, and you flickered through them all as you stared at the screen. Narrowing it down, you felt like a comedy might be a good choice, lighten the air with something easy going and funny, nothing too intense, and the couch dipped at the very opposite end as your company sat as far away as he could, leaning against the other arm of the couch but dropping his phone charger down onto the space between, an olive branch extended in the form of a tangled phone wire.

“How about ‘Jumanji’?”

“Good film.” He mumbled, and you nibble don your lower lip, before he was letting out the breath he was holding and turning towards you. “Second one is on here too, we could watch them both. I haven’t seen that one, just the first.”

“It’s a plan.” You confirmed, clicking play on the movie and crossing your legs, leaning over the side of the couch to try and locate a socket, pushing the plug into the wall, and hooking your phone up the power, the device buzzing in your hand as it began to charge up.

Dwayne Johnson and Kevin Hart were an entertaining pair on screen, and as the group began to navigate through the jungle, you let yourself become immersed in what you were seeing on screen. It wasn’t all that hard, because Jack black was hilarious. The occasional echo of a laugh from one or both of you would crack the silence when something happened, and the picking of loose threads on your jumper had begun to stop as you settled a little more into the situation, your anxiety settling and not needing to be quite so stiff.

When there were only twenty minutes or so until the end of the first movie, your phone buzzed, and then again, a series of rapidly incoming texts, and flipping over the device, it was revealed to you as your friend. Swiping it open, you pulled up the texts, chuckling to yourself at the frantic collection of broken messages that she had sent to you.

[soph 🌹] only just woke up, so sorry!!

[soph 🌹] just checked news, no way to get to u!!

[soph 🌹] roads all blocked, wtf, when did this snow come down??

[soph 🌹] kinda funny tho.

[soph 🌹] only u would go for a hookup and get snowed in there.

[soph 🌹] is he at least hot? tap that again. fill the day with hot sex??

You scoffed, but your lips were forming a smile, and you could feel the glances that were being cast your way every couple of seconds, choosing to glance up and return the look as he turned to face you once again.

“My friend just woke up, she’s finally learning about the snow.”

“Did she know you were still, um..” He scratched at the back of his neck, other hand casting around the apartment. “-out?”

Heat flushed your own cheeks, before you were nodding your head, and he seemed or accept that, silence forming between you both once again as he turned to look back at the TV screen, but stretching out with a little more comfort, long legs crossing at the ankles from where they were extended before him, and he lounged back a little more.

> that’s definitely not going to happen.

You were only given a moment of reprieve, before your phone was chiming again.

[soph 🌹] why not!! not like you’ve got anything else to do

> probably bc we're not exactly getting along. civil at best.

She didn’t respond after that, leaving your message on read, and you assumed that she’d become preoccupied with the man you guessed would have spent the night there with her, and once again, you were envious of her for being at home and comfortable in her own space, when instead, you felt like you were walking on eggshells.

The majority of the second movie was spent more on taking in the details of the apartment around you, instead of the plot line and characters. Posters hung up on the walls, and you wondered how he could afford to live here, the place was nice, but there was nothing here that suggested another person lived in the apartment, but there was no way a college student could afford a place like this alone, unless his parents were paying for it. It was a nice area, the kind of place you could live with if you had kids or were elderly, and you were pretty sure on your way over here the night before that you’d seen someone walking a dog, making it the picture-perfect neighbourhood.

College textbooks and stationery were around, a stack of notebooks and text printouts sitting on the little table before you, and it was almost fifteen minutes before you built up the confidence to lean forward and take them all in with a little more detail. He watched as you went, your eyes moving to meet his as you waited for permission, but he never stopped you, so you picked up the first book that was on top.

‘Art within Literature: The Importance of Illustrations’

“Didn’t have you pegged for an art kinda’ guy.” You mumbled, and you heard him chuckle, before he was sitting up a little straighter, moving across the couch closer to you just slightly, to see which one you had picked up.

“Not the first time I’ve been told that, actually.” He grabbed at the controls, your eyes flickering up to the screen as the sound of the movie cut off, replaced by the boring drone of the local news station, but right now, it may as well have been the most important thing in the world as the two of you perked up to listen. Placing the book back down, your legs folded underneath yourself, and you secretly had your hopes up that they were going to be getting around to this end of the city soon.

It took a while, the list of places that were being cleared was working out from the inner city in circles, your hopes falling more and more and you listened, getting an update on the weather about how it was expected to be even colder tonight than it had been last night, and the snowfall wasn’t expected to stop anytime soon, but instead, you would be here even longer than expected. The earliest that there were any plans for the road to be cleared in this area was tomorrow morning, and sadness was once again spiking within your system, feeling the man beside you sag with just as much disappointment.

“Guess I’ll set the couch up for you, later.”

“Thanks.” You hoped your lack of enthusiasm didn’t show in your voice, because you truly were grateful, and he stood up, wandering away to his bedroom and grabbing the plastic woven basket he’d been using earlier as he went, presumably to start up another load of laundry. When the door to the apartment closed behind him, you were left in silence once again, and you turned down the volume and picked up the next book that had been on his pile.

This one was a sketchbook, that much was clear as soon as you opened the book, and his full name was written across the front page, information on how to return it if it came up lost followed it, smudged fingerprints from graphite and coloured chalks were also along the corners. Flipping the first page, you were caught a little off-guard by the image you saw, yet not entirely surprised.

Clearly, his passions lay with fiction and fantasy, the name of what you assumed to be some kind of ancient Greek novel, much like ‘Iliad’ or ‘The Odyssey’, because a range of different creatures and monsters were scattered across the pages beautiful drawings, incredible details and shading, and you’d never seen anything quite like them. You wanted to trace your fingers over them, but resisted in fear of ruining the delicate art, and flicked through the pages instead.

At the top of some pages the book titles changed, inspirations from different famous works, some you knew and some you didn’t, but the drawings were always perfect. When you reached the final page, you placed it down, guilt once again running through your veins as you remembered the way you’d snapped at him this morning, because the more you learned about him, the more you realised he wasn’t all that bad, and he was probably a pretty decent guy, if you’d just given him the chance to be.

Getting up from the couch, an idea was forming in your mind, a way to at least try to pay him back or make your appreciation known, and you found yourself again in his kitchen, hands on the cupboard doors as you began to look through them.

They were mostly empty, not much in place but enough to make it work, you were sure of it, you could whip up something out of all of it, and you moved across to have a look at the contents of the tall refrigerator hidden in the corner.

“Need help finding something?”

You startled, turning to look at him and closing the fridge, and his hands were on his hips as he stared at you, your arms wrapping around yourself gently as you shrugged. You couldn’t blame him for being a little putt-off, you were just a stranger after all, but you wanted to at least try and make proper amends with him, and so you let yourself be unbothered by the frustration flashing over his features.

“What are you looking for?”

“I was just seeing what you had in.” You waved a hand behind yourself, swallowing thickly and taking a small step around the dining table towards him. “I was just seeing what you had, because I was hoping to cook dinner for you, maybe? Y’know, as a thank you for letting me stay with you, and keeping me warm and all, even though I was rude this morning.”

“Oh.” The tightness in his shoulders loosened, his body slumping a little, tension melting away, and a bashful look flickered over the anger, taking its place as he tried to muster a smile for you. “That would, uh, be nice. Thanks. I don’t have a lot in, though.”

“You really don’t. Do you just survive on junk food and pasta?”

He laughed, a genuine laugh at that, before he was standing before you and reaching over to the cupboards, pulling out a packet of pasta, and holding it out to you. “What’s wrong with junk food and pasta?”

“Nothing! But it’s all you have!”

He only grinned, opening the fridge and standing to the side, double-checking what he had in. “Well, I’ll have you know that I make a great minestrone, and that’s what I was planning to have for my dinner tonight. You can join me.”

“I don’t know how to make that.”

“Well, I’ll teach you, and it’ll change your life. I swear it.” He closed the fridge, leaning back against it with a questioning look on his face, and you shrugged, but you felt a lot more comfortable already, the simple banter between you both mending a broken bridge.

“I was supposed to be cooking you dinner though.”

“You can be my sous-chef, how about that?” Now that was a deal you could work with, and you shook his hand, this time it was filled with giggles and wide smiles, as opposed to the last time you’d come to an agreement over breakfast only a few hours ago, the beginning of the day bringing much brighter prospects than the early morning had. “Now, what do you want to do until then?”

That was a good question, and it took you a minute to think about it, eyes glancing around his apartment for inspiration, pausing on the television stand with boxes of games stacked up underneath, and you lit up a little. “How about board games?”

He groaned, loudly, and you found amusement in it once again, being that this was his apartment, and he was finding issues with his own methods of entertainment and possessions. “Nobody plays board games while sober.”

“It's midday! We’re not getting drunk at midday!”

It was scandalous, and you didn’t have much more space to give over to scandals within the next twenty-four hours, pretty much having reached your quota already, and a cheeky look flickered over his features. “Well, we don’t necessarily have to drink..”

“What are you suggesting?”

Your eyes narrowed on him, and he spun on his heel, not saying a thing but letting you follow him. He cleared the books from the coffee table, stacking them all away on the floor in the corner, before lifting up the fold in the middle. He reached inside, and you waited patiently, your jaw dropping as he revealed the item to you, looking more than proud of himself.

A bong, tall with green glass, and it was decorated and bejewelled along the bottom, stickers and actions figures stuck to it, the whole collections making you snort a laugh as you looked at him, before your hands were landing on your hips and a look that you hoped read as ‘seriously?’ written on your face.

“What, you don’t want to?” He waited a moment longer, nibbling on his lower lip, before sitting on the opposite side of the coffee table and finding his lighter. He also reached for the first box on the top of the file, producing a box with one word across the front, brightly coloured and you recognised it. “Suit yourself, but I am. I need something to get through the whole afternoon with you.”

The comment would have stung a lot more had it not been for the cheeky wink that he added onto the end to tell you he was joking, and you sat cross-legged opposite him, picking up the box labelled ‘UNO’ and tipping the deck out into your hands. He clicked at the lighter, waiting for it to spark up, before his mouth was meeting one end of the glass, the contents inside bubbling and gurgling a little as he inhaled, and you dealt out the cards.

He hummed, head tipping back, eyes closed as he settled into the feeling of his eye, and as though he could feel you watching him, his head fell forwards, eyes opening to look at you. “Sure you don’t want any?”

You waited only a moment longer, before huffing out, holding your hand out for them both. “Fine, hand it over.” He placed both pieces on the table, sliding them across the polished wood to you, and you picked them up. Clicking on the flame, you adjusted it in your hand, lips pressing to the cool rim of glass, swilling it a little for good measure, before you were lighting up the end.

Steamy smoke curled up into your lungs as you inhaled deeply, warmth racing through your body as a tingling kind of feeling ran through your throat, tickling and making you grin, in a way that you were familiar with and yet hadn't been accustomed to in a long time. The buzzing feeling raced through your body, already kick-starting nerves and reactions that had felt dormant for a long time.

You hadn't been to a party, a real and exciting college party, since your break up. You’d locked in and sealed yourself away ever since your heart had been broken, and it felt good to adventure back out into the world like this, even if you were locked away with a guy from halfway across town whom you’d known for about twelve hours. “Okay, you were right.”

“Feel better?” He grinned, holding his hand out for the device, and for a little while, the two of you simply shared it between you, letting that initial tingle grow into a proper buzz the world around you beginning to slip away into a haze. Your vision was soft around the edges, slightly out of focus, and the world felt a little more comfortable. Spreading your legs out underneath the coffee table, your back leaned against the couch, feet in his lap as he sat with his legs crossed and folded under him.

When you’d decided your high was enough, you’d started with the games. ‘UNO’ had brought on rivalry and chaos, the two of you raising your voices to the point that you’d been yelling at one another, throats going a little sore as you cursed and laughed, not quite sentient enough now to make the best calls at the game, and so it had felt like it had dragged on for hours, before you had finally been the champion.

He had challenged you to a rematch in the form of a board game called ‘Frustration’, and the two of you had been so busy playing that the time was slipping away around you, the board being flipped by you as he began to win, counters scattering across the floor, and he looked completely and utterly insulted at it, before cracking up laughing with you once again.

After that, you had sprawled all of the games out over the floor, some of them being team games that you were unable to play together, and you’d refused to play a drawing game with him, because you’d peeked at his designs, and were scared to showcase your own drawing in front of him, worried that he’d completely put you to shame and leave you embarrassed.

Poker had been too much of a challenge, half of the pieces for the monopoly board were missing, and you’d done every round of Mario Kart at least once by the time it had come to turning off the console under the TV. Joining you by your side, the two of you were slumped lazily into the couch cushions, shoulders pressed together as the bong sat between you, fresh hits racing through your systems to keep everything exciting, but the thrill of the act itself was beginning to die off, and you were once again out of things to do for entertainment.

At some point, the light outside of the windows had faded, the clumps of snow that had been left along the windowsill were still rising, flakes still falling in flurries from the clouds, except what had once been visible in the day was now dark, the low light of the lamps in the room spilling golden light out across the walls and carpet. Rolling your head to the side, you took in the man sitting before you, watching as he tapped his feet repetitively on the coffee table to the beat of a song you didn’t recognise.

“I looked at your drawings.”

“What?” He paused, twisting to look at you, and he sat up a little further.

“I was being nosey. Earlier, I looked at the drawings in your sketchbook.” His gaze flickered to the leather-bound book in the corner, stacked up with the rest of his belongings, before getting up and putting the bong away, folding the edge of the table back down, and wiping a hand over his face, cheeks tinted pink, and you weren’t sure if it was from the warmth of the room or out of embarrassment. “They’re incredible. Some of the best illustrations I’ve ever seen, actually.”

“You really think so?”

“Yeah. I could never draw like that. I can’t even draw stick men without them being wobbly, sometimes.” He smiled again at that, and you found an odd feeling running through you at the idea that you were able to make him smile, your stomach clenching and twisting as he looked at you fondly, shaking his head a little, eyes dropping to the floor.

“I don’t get a lot of practice with it, I can’t get any apprenticeships yet because nobody wants to hire someone who’s only experience is in one element. Mine being fantasy-sorts, I suppose.”

“Will you draw me?”

“What?” He looked a little startled, eyes wide, and you shuffled forwards on the couch, hand twitching to reach out and take his as you tried to reassure him, watching uncertainty flick over his face. “I don’t really have experience with drawing people. More the imaginary things, described but never seen, less to fuck up if there’s nothing to compare it to.”

“I don’t think you’ll fuck it up.” He swallowed thickly, moving to kneel on the other side of the table, his sketchbook in hands as he fidgeted with it.

“If I mess it up, don’t make me show you, okay?” You only nodded, and he hesitated a moment longer, before getting himself into a more comfortable position, searching through the drawers around him to find his pencils and equipment, laying them out and taking an extra amount of time to line them all up perfectly, and you were sure it was because he wanted to give himself a spare few seconds to hype himself up to it.

You waited patiently, just now beginning to process what was about to happen, and that you’d have to sit still for a long time, while he stared at you, drawing every highlight and flaw of you, while you remained steady under his gaze for as long as it took. When he was ready, you moved yourself a little more, sinking down onto the floor after rounding the coffee table, sitting at the side of it as he positioned you.

“Can you, um-” He tugged two fingers on his own t-shirt, and you looked down at your hoodie, the hood of it crowding around your shoulders, and you nodded, tugging it up from the bottom and over your head. A cool breeze swept over your skin, exposed with only the thin satin camisole hanging on your body to keep you warm, but you felt yourself light up on fire with the way his eyes swept over you. “However you’re comfortable. I’m just going to draw your head and shoulders, so, do whatever you want.”

You pressed your elbows to the wood, hand forming a loose fist and your cheek pressed to it, leaning like that, a slight ankle, and he nodded his head to himself, seeming to approve of the pose. Picking up a pencil, he studied you for a second, the nib hovering over the paper as he held it at an angle that couldn't see, perfect for him to work on though, before stopping.

Placing the pencil between his lips, he held it there, reaching forwards to pull a few strands of your hair free on either side, framing your face and letting them dangle there, curling one around his finger a little to make it twisted, before he was pulling back. “You’re so pretty.”

After that, he was working. Quick strokes of his pencil over the paper as he created the first outline of you, your head, where and how your hair would fall, your hand holding up your head and down to the spaghetti straps on your shoulders, quick movements, a lot of erasing, and very light brushes of the graphite over the paper. Once he was sure he had the form right, only a few minutes in, he started on the details.

His eyes, lingering on your face, licking at his lips to keep them wet as he worked, parted for short breaths, unaware of what he was doing and you resisted biting down on your own as you looked at him, trying to hold your position. It was hard, the look of concentration on his face while staring at your mouth, or the determination in his eyes as he held your gaze and yet was so far away, taking in every little detail, until he was rubbing his finger over certain spots to create shading, and create the minute detailed with finally sharped tips.

Your arm was sore and neck aching when he finally told you that you could sit up, and you rolled your head from side to side, loosening the muscles and tendons that had begun to lock up from the prolonged length of time motionless. He was clutching the pad to his chest, fingers tapping at the back, some slightly smudged with grey graphite, and you inched closer to him.

“Can I see?”

“I haven’t decided yet.” He tried to laugh at his own comment, but was nervous, and you placed a hand over his gently, pulling it toward you slowly, and he gave no reluctance, but wasn’t moving of his own accord. “Okay, you can look, but you have to remember that I’m not good at drawing people, and I’m still high as fuck.”

You’d almost forgotten about that, and it was just now clicking with you why you’d been bold enough to do something like model for a sketch, your inhibitions lower, the boldness of nightfall giving you yet another boost in something that you’d never have done earlier in the day. Taking it from him, you turned it around, seeing the nervous look on his face before you were looking down at the sketch. His own worries had prepared you for the worst, but as you looked at it, you decided it wasn’t all that bad.

There was certainly work to be done, but he had the basic forms down, even you could tell that. It was clear that his skill lay elsewhere, the detailing of things like fins and scales was nothing like drawing the subtle imperfections of skin and the dips and dimples of a face, the creases where a fist held a head up nothing like the folds along the back of a monster, but he certainly had a grounding to work from, and you loved what you were seeing despite it all.

“I love it.”

“You’re totally lying to me.” He mumbled, and you shook your head, placing the notepad down, and fixing your attention on him. “It fuckin’ sucks.”

“It does not! I think it's really good. Especially since you said you had no practice, I was expecting something bad. This is so much better than you made it out to be.”

His lips flicked up at the sides, his head raising, bringing him a little closer to you as he straightened out, feeling better about it all now. “You should’ve seen some of the things I drew in high school. My portraits were awful back then, but I was drawing people while in the car, so it wasn't the smoothest of working places.”

“Yeah, well, I think you’ve come a long way since high school, and I think you’re really talented.”

He hummed, eyes flicking down to your lips again, and this time, as he licked at his own, there was no excuse of artwork, or anything else, your heart jumping slightly in your chest. There was a moment, a second’s hesitation as you questioned whether this was what you wanted. There was time to stop, to pull back, his nose bumping yours lightly, warm breath washing over your mouth, and you were a second away from closing the gap, before loud knocking was sounding at the door, and making the decision for you.

Pulling back, his gaze went over your head, brows furrowing as he stared at the door. “Hello?”

You winced at the loud shout, and he mumbled an apology upon realising it, slight disappointment surging through you, but not as much as relief. You were growing more and more attached to this man, but at the end of the snowstorm, you’d still have to leave, and he was still a stranger. You were high, and the romanticism of the situation was morphing things to look rose-tinted and alluring, and you wanted to be of a rational mind to make a decision like that. “Hey, Joel! It’s Mandy, I was wondering if you would grab your stuff from the laundry room, so I can put a couple of loads through?”

His eyes went wide, gaze dropping to your own for a second. “Shit, I totally forgot about the laundry!”

His hand slipped down to yours, fingers lacing together as he tugged you up from the floor, handing you the basket that had been discarded hours ago, and he opened the door, an older woman who looked positively exhausted, arms full of boy’s clothing, and you pitied her knowing that she must be trapped in a shoebox apartment with a son who would be bouncing off of the walls and unable to burn off that energy.

“Sorry, Mandy, I forgot about it. We’ll grab it now.”

“We?” You muttered, the woman’s eyes flickering over you in amusement, and you were tugged out of the apartment and towards the stairs quickly, hearing the door close behind you, and the much slower steps of the tired mother as she trailed you.

The concrete was cold underfoot, especially the lower you got, and you hissed as your sock-covered feet hit the icy stone, never having had a chance to put on your shoes. Putting the container down, he opened it up, steam curling out into the air, even though the dryer had been finished for hours.

‘You couldn't have let me put my jumper on before we came down here? It’s literally freezing over right outside that window.” You mumbled, Joel turning to you, and he cringed a little, as though he had only just remembered the scrap of fabric you were wearing as a top. Pulling an armful of the warm clothing, he sorted through them, pulling a cosy looking jacket from within, and wrapping it over your shoulders. Heat seeped back into your body, warmed from the machine, and you barely noticed the mother entering the room, waiting for Joel to clear his clothes out, watching as you ripped the hoodie up along the front of your body, hood pulled up and hands made into paws by the long sleeves.

“You look cute.”

“I look cold.” You retorted, and he only rolled his eyes, but Mandy laughed, and that was enough recognition for you.

“Yeah, well, we can make some hot food when we get upstairs and you’ll be fine, how about that?” He sat the collection under one arm, offering his other hand to you, and you pushed up the sleeve of the borrowed hoodie, weaving your fingers with his as he guided you from the room.

“I’ve been waiting for this minestrone you’ve been boasting about. I need to see if it lives up to the hype.

“Hey, everyone loves my minestrone!” He backed his way into the home, dropping your hand in order to place down the basket that wouldn’t be looked at for hours now, you were sure. He ushered you into the kitchen, hurting you along until his hands were tickling at your sides and you were squirming under his touch, laugh loudly as he pushed you into the little room.

You worked alongside him, trying to take in the information he was giving to you but it was hard, because the little things he was doing were distracting you. The way in which his hands moved as he chopped the vegetables or prepare the meat, the passionate easy his voice sounded as he told you all about it, his eyes sparkling a little while instructing you, and the little jokes he’d make while bumping you out of the way with his hip, or guiding you around with nudges of his elbow or shoulders.

While cooking, he opened up a little, a story that you’d never have expected to learn from him, but he told you anyway. His parents had died in a car accident when he was young, too young to really remember them, but he’s been allowed to take several boxes of things with him to his foster home as he waited for adoption, and he’d taken his mother’s recipe book as one of those items.

When he’d been adopted, a man whose family had died and he’d become a foster parent, had helped him experiment with his cooking and drawing, instead of forcing him into typical paths for men to take, making him become a football player or a lawyer like he’d expected he’d end up after leaving the system.

A younger sister, also adopted from another family called Minnow, and a dog adopted from a shelter called ‘Boy’, and suddenly, in the space of time that it had taken to make the meal, delicious smell floating around you, he’d spilled to you his history, and you’d listened quietly as he got it off his chest, figuring out somewhere along the way that you were probably one of the only people to ever know this story.

You weren’t sure if that brought you comfort or not, whether he was telling you out of trust and connection, or whether he was telling you because he knew that you’d never see one another again after today, and so he didn’t mind sharing his deepest protected truths. During the heavy discussion, the nibbling of food and the time passing you by, the high you’d once claimed was beginning to fizzle out, everything coming back to sharpness once again, and yet somehow, just by being in his presence, you still felt that same freedom.

When you were sitting back at the table, he was staring at you with excitement now, watching as you lifted a spoonful of the concoction to your lips to try it, seemingly leaving behind the heavy conversation that had taken place as he simply moved on. You took a longer than needed time to assess it, humming contemplatively just to put him through his paces, before finally giving in.

“Okay, this is really good, I’ll give you that.”

“I told you so!” He cheered loudly, arms thrown up in the air, and you laughed a little, tucking into your meal, and wiping up one of the bread rolls that he'd placed into the middle of the table for you both.

You were tempted to ask him for the recipe, knowing that one day you’d be craving it again, and yet, you weren’t sure if you could, whether it would be appropriate or whether that would be crossing a line, to ask to take away a piece of something that he shared with his late mother.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Shoot.” You spoke, tearing off a mouthful of bread roll after dipping it into the soup mix, and chewing slowly as you waited for him to reply.  

“Did you mean it?” You paused your chewing, confusion making itself known on your face as you silently questioned what he meant, stirring your dinner with your spoon as you waited for him to elaborate, and he swallowed his mouthful to do so. “When you said my name sounded like a first draft of a name.”

For the umpteenth time today, embarrassment and regret was flooding through you, and you took your time to finish the food you were eating, his gaze lingering on you as he waited. When you couldn't stall any longer, you sipped at your water, before giving in. “Yes, I did.” His mouth pursed into a thin line, and you reached a hand out across the table, trying to contain your amusement. “Like, a really good first draft, though, almost there!”

“Nice save.”

Silence fell between you both once again, eating food in a comfortable quiet, and once again the direct parallel to this morning’s porridge struck through you, only twelve hours having passed and yet absolutely everything was different between you both. You couldn't put your finger on what it was about him, something that had caught your attention the first time around had now got you captive again, and there was just something adorably charming about everything he did.

Handsome but bashful, shy but cocky, always making jokes but somehow being able to jump right into something deep and meaningful too, and you’d closed yourself off for so long that it was a little scary for everything you were feeling to come rushing back all at once.

You hadn't had a crush since high school, and you weren’t sure if you liked the idea of one forming now.

“What about the other thing, did you mean that, too?” You searched your mind, reliving that argument as you tried to work out what he was referring to, and you almost dropped your spoon as it all came crashing down, remembering the harsh words that you’d spat in the eat of the moment, and yet it didn’t make them any less true. You only nodded your head, and he let out a loud groan, pouting a little. “Well, that fucking sucks.”

“Don’t be too hard on yourself, it’s really hard to do! Women are just better at doing that themselves, y’know? We don’t have to talk about it.”

“That doesn't help! You can’t just, like, drop a bomb on me like that; ‘hey, maybe you've never made a girl come in your entire freakin’ life’ and then say you don’t want to talk about it!” He pushed his empty dish away from himself, and your brows raised, arms crossing over atop the table, staring at him critically, and deciding you were finished with your food. “I want to talk!”

“No way! Guys can't handle constructive criticism like that! We’ll end up just like we were this morning, and then we’ll be back to square one! I like how we are now!”

“No! I promise you, I can take it. Just, help me out, here?” He reached out, pushing the dishes out of the way so that nothing was in the way, putting on his best puppy dog eyes. “You help me, I’ll help you.”

“What do you mean help me? You think you got pointers for me?”

“This isn’t a one-way street! Last night was awesome, but you could improve on a few things too. Guess you’ll never know, now, though.” He sighed, glancing off over your head, and you knew it was bait, some very obvious bait at that, and you hated to fall for it, but your own insecurities were getting the best of you, and you huffed loudly.

“Fine!” He turned back to you, a wicked smile on his lips as he realised that clearly, he had won. “I bite, you got me. Go!”

“Okay, this isn't just you, I just wanna’ make that clear to start with.” You raised a brow, leaning back in your chair, arm still crossed and listening intently. “What is with the whole lights off, thing? The fuck is that? If the lights are off, like you requested and I so gentlemanly obliged, I could be having sex with anything! I don’t want to be having sex with anything, I want to be having sex with you.” He paused, eyes darting away from you for only a second, and he wet his lips. “Or, y’know, whoever it is I’m with.”

“Lights on? Wow, and all guys feel this way?” He opened his mouth to reply, before you were letting out a loud ‘booing’ sound. “Duh! Girls hear that more than ‘hello’. That’s all you got?”

“Okay, okay, alright.” He smirked slightly, leaning forwards and resting his forearms on the table. “You, and by you, I mean women in general, do this thing where you stand up, and kinda’ turn away, and then get undressed, like, super-fast. Like you’re at the doctors or something, getting a physical!”

“I’ve never had any complaints about how fast I undress before. Most guys like naked me.”

“I love naked you.” He dropped his gaze, scanning along your body, and you threw a bread roll at him as you realised he was remembering you without your clothes on from the night before, the soft accompaniment bouncing from his head and rolling over the table. “Hey! I’m just saying! Naked you is awesome to look at, and touch, but what I mean is that you could make the getting to being naked part a little more exciting.”

“Exciting?”

“Yeah! You know, do that whole slow bra thing, take it off to the side. Drop it in that sexy way. Do that little ass thing with your panties, y’know, where you just-” He wiggled in his seat, demonstrating the little as movement that all girls did with their panties when they wanted to feel a little sexy. “All I’m saying is that guys like the undressing part too, make it more of a.. thing.”

“Anything else?”

“Yes, actually. One more thing.” He paused, this seemingly the one he was most nervous about, and you leaned forward on your elbows, watching him lean in a little too, rolling his lips before speaking. “When I was inside of you, you did this thing. You started helping yourself a little bit, it kind of made me feel like I was being benched. Second-string, forgotten.”

“Duly noted.” You mumbled, and he shrugged a little, the space between you both going void of sound but crackling with electricity. “Is it my turn now?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, first of all, I don’t know who taught guys to do that alphabet thing with their tongue, but it kind of makes me feel like I’m Helen Keller being fucked by her teacher.”

“That’s not a fantasy of yours?” He faked shock, and you tried to cover up your laugh to keep the conversation as serious as you could, and he tried to still himself, nodding for you to continue.

“There was this one moment, during foreplay, where I was close to coming, and I’m pretty sure I subtly pointed it out. Do you remember what I said?”

“Uh, ‘I’m close to coming’?”

“Yes, that’s it!” He scowled falsely, unsure where you were going with this, and it was your turn to smirk a little. “Right after I said that, you totally switched up what you were doing. What was the thought process there? If you had me right there at third, home base in sight, why would you start running in a different direction?”

“Okay, got it. That’s actually helpful.”

“All my tips are helpful! Like, also, you waited for me to undress you. Which was awkward, and a little weird, don’t do that.” You were almost out of advice, pausing for a second to think. “When a girl helps out, that's a good thing! This is sex, not a competition, my ex was weird about that too, just embrace the team spirit, it makes it better for everyone.” He nodded, and you felt a little out of breath, but a weight lifted off your shoulders. “Oh! Yeah, you went too fast. I felt like I was being drilled for oil. Girls want fast, but also slow. Kinda’ felt like you were in a rush, had somewhere better to be.”

“Trust me, I didn’t.”

“Obviously.” You teased, and he grinned, taking in all the information you were giving him. “Lastly, I guess it’s just after. Like, as soon as we finished, you retreated to the other side of the bed like you’d planted a bomb down there. Stick around, hold a girl, count to ten or something. That one will get you a long way, trust me.”

“Cuddling. Noted.”

“Other than that, you were a perfectly adequate lover.” He gaped at you a little, and his whole body sagged.

“Adequate? What a way to boost a guy’s ego.”

“See, I knew this would happen, you’re-”

“Fine! I’m fine!” He reached out, placing a hand over one of yours, and squeezing comfortingly. “Seriously, now I know. I can make use of that advice next time.” He offered you a smile, and you tried to return it, nervous butterflies making you feel a little nauseous as you tried to settle yourself, no indication that he was angry or upset with you. “You said something about your ex in there, y’know. Is that why you broke up, crappy sex?”

You knew it was meant as a joke, something to lighten the mood, but your stomach dropped. “Uh, no.” You cleared your throat, hands pulling from his to clasp them in your lap as you looked away. “That would’ve been because I found him in our bed with one of my friends.”

The air went dead, silence encased you, and you heard the legs of his chair scrape on the floor as he pushed it back. Kneeling in front of you, he took your hands in his, forcing you to meet his eye. “I’m really sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up.”

“It’s okay. At least I know she isn't getting much.”

He chuckled, but it was dry and empty, and he reached up, brushing a thumb over your cheek. “For the record, I think he’s a dipshit. You’re an amazing girl, anybody who would cheat on you isn’t worth you.”

“Thanks, Joel.”

He stood up, pulling you with him, until you were standing up once again. “Go find another film. I’ll get us all sorted here. Anything you want, it’ll cheer you up.” You waited a moment longer, ready to do as he’d said, before a set of lips were brushing against your forehead, and your breath hitched in your throat. Pressing into the touch just a little, it was almost embarrassing how you reacted, how much you’d missed simple affections, how it felt to be excited around someone instead of just bored or dreading having to see them, the excitement of once again experiencing the thrill of something invigorating and new. “I’m honestly sorry for bringing it up.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“Kinda’ is.” He mumbled, fingers playing with yours lightly where your hands were still hanging connected, and the whole experience was a little different. This wasn’t a near-miss kiss while high after the intimacy of drawing one another, nor was it holding hands in the rush to get to the laundry room while hopped up on adrenaline and a little embarrassment. “He’s a moron, and he didn’t deserve you. Neither did your friend, if she’d do something like that to you.”

“They deserve each other.”

“Atta’ girl.” He teased, squeezing your hand once more, before letting you go, and as you settled down onto the couch cushions, you had to try hard just to steady your racing heart as you scroll through movies on Netflix, perched happily along the couch, but it was a little chilly, the space heater was barely holding its own against the chill of the outside.

“You got any blankets?” You didn’t even bother turning your head as you shouted the words, still exploring the film choices, and this time, you went for something a little more exciting. A ‘Mission Impossible’ movie was always a hit, right? Everybody loves Tom Cruise.

“Yes, I do.” You jumped, never having heard him moving around, and he stood before you, a fluffy looking blanket bundled in his arms, and you made grabby-hands for it with a grin. He shook his head, slumping down beside you on the ouch, and you bounced a little with the movements he made. “What, you think I read your mind? This blanket is for me, but I might just share it with you.”

“Yeah, what’s the catch?”

“You have to smile, so I know you’re really okay.” You couldn’t help it, trying to bite back the grin on your face as you flushed with shy heat, and he whooped loudly upon seeing the expression. Spreading the blanket out across you both, his fingers brushed across your skin, tucking it around your thighs and over your waist as he and sure you were covered, before his arm was stretching out along the back of the couch behind you.

“You’re too smooth for your own good.”

“Don’t get used to it, I’m incredibly awkward and not nearly as brave, usually.” You rolled your eyes, nudging your shoulder against his but not bothering to say anything, and starting up the movie.

Tucking your legs underneath yourself, you adjusted the blanket, your feet cold as you lifted them up from the cooled flooring, and directing your attention over to your phone. It had been hours since you’d check it, since you'd even felt the need to know whether anyone else had been in touch with you, and even as that realisation came to mind, you still didn’t budge to collect it.

Earlier in the day, you had been bitter and wishing to be home, where you’d inevitably only be locked up tight in your own bedroom and watching movies to pass the time away, listening to Sophie and her boyfriend move around the apartment, trapped in permanently third-wheeling until the snow melted. Now, you were happy, knowing that you’d made a new friend, and that you were at least venturing back out into the world for the first time since having your heart broken.

A hand came down, fingers playing with the edges of your hair lightly, twirling a light strand between his fingers, and as you swept your gaze over the man a foot or so away from you on the couch, his eyes were still fixed on the screen of the television. His fingers brushed against your neck occasionally, and each time, you had to suppress the urge to shiver. It was an invitation, the changing for day to night once again shifting everything between you both, unspoken words to invite you closer, easy for you to choose to take, or not to take, and nothing would be said about it at all.

Your entire body ran over with goosebumps, and your fingers picked lightly at the blanket, unsure of which move you wanted to make. On the one hand, you could definitely take that step, move a little closer and risk falling into that again, or you could stay where you were, play it safe and not risk a thing. Fold your cards and wait for the next round.

“I’ll just be a minute, okay?”

You stood up, his hand falling away from yourself and the blanket laying down on the couch, and he nodded his head, a barely present smile on his face as he nodded his head, and you slipped away, giving yourself just a moment to think as you disappeared to the bathroom. Closing the door behind yourself, you leaned back against it, letting out a deep breath and trying to clear your mind, weighing the pros and cons of where this night might go.

Shaking yourself down a little, you felt the tension flee from your body, and you placed your hands onto the sink, staring at yourself in the mirror hanging over it. You were always playing it safe, always had, and maybe that’s why your ex had adventured and found excitement somewhere else, needing the thrill of it, because you never took risks.

If you hadn't taken a risk last night, you wouldn't be here now, and after all, you’d had a great day. Maybe it would blow up and backfire, maybe when the snow melted you’d never see him again, maybe it wouldn't work out, but you’d never know if you didn’t at least try.

“Oh, woman up. For once in your life.” You muttered, running the water and splashing a little of the cool liquid over your face, refreshing yourself with just how icy cold it was, a little hiss leaving you. Shaking your hands off and patting your face dry, you ran a hand through your hair, deciding you were ready. Uncapping the toothpaste, you took a small chunk from it on your finger, placing the blob onto your tongue and licking it around your mouth for freshness, doing the best you could to clean your teeth a little, before using your hands as a cup and rinsing with some water.

At least you felt a little fresher and more alluring now. A good confidence booster, because fuck it, you were all in.

Stepping back out into the main room, you undid the zipper on the hoodie of his that you’d borrowed, letting it hang open along the front, the thin satin of your camisole on display, the material falling away from one shoulder as it hung baggy on your body now that it was open. Upon your return, he turned to look at you, lips parting a little as his eyes flickered along your body, gaze lingering on the exposed skin of your shoulder, your arms, the midriff shown between the edge of your top and the hem of your leggings, before his jaw was snapping shut, and he met your eyes again, only for a split second, before looking back to the movie.

Lifting the edge of the blanket, you sat a little closer to him than you had been before, your arm brushing against his side as you got comfy, and you heard him let out a slightly shaky breath, fingers tapping against the back of the couch, behind where your head had once been, now further down the couch as you sat close enough to smell the lingering aftershave on his skin.

Five long minutes passed, and you almost thought you’d overstepped, that he didn’t want this as much as you thought he would, that the connection was one-sided, but then his hand slipped down, fingers brushing over the bare skin of your shoulder on the side where the jacket had dipped down, nails scraping slightly, before the rest of his arm followed. Slipping it around your shoulders, his hand hung over you, playing lightly with the spaghetti strap of your top, running along the silky material, under it, playing with it in slow and absentminded patterns, and you contained yourself from celebrating out loud, or doing something that wouldn't be considered as ‘playing it cool’.

You paused, giving it just enough time, the feeling of roughened fingertips rubbing along your skin, and after a moment, you realised it was being inched a little further over. As the strap fell away, falling over your arm again, his movements paused, everything going still for just a second, before his fingertips were pressing to bare skin again. Twisting towards him a little more, you pressed up to his side, lifting a leg until the lower half of your legs were tangled together as they sat ahead of you, propped up on the coffee table.

He hummed a little under his breath, your head adjusting to rest on his shoulder, and he dared to reach his fingers a little lower than just along your shoulder, brushing as far as the undersides of your collarbones, and you cuddled in a little closer to him still.

“I can’t stop thinking about what you said.” His words were gruff, voice low and gravelling as he kept his tone to just above a whisper, and you rolled your lips together for a second, trying to settle on your words.

“And what would that be?”

“Well, y’know, all the improvements I could make. I’ve been thinking about it.” You only hummed, fingers smoothing over his stomach and across towards his side until you were holding onto him, and the muscles underneath tensed and rippled under the soft cotton tee he was wearing. “But, I’d never really know if I was getting it right until I put it into practice.”

“Well, that does make sense.”

“Yeah, and I mean, I’d need someone who could tell me, give me real talk.” He was continuing on with the rouse, the playful energy between you both sparkling, and the movie was long-forgotten, simply becoming background noise.

“Makes sense. Someone to guide you as you go.”

“Exactly.” He mumbled, turning himself enough to drag the tip of his nose over your cheek, and you tipped your head back a little, making it easier for him as his lips brushed your cheek. “Know anyone up for the task?”

“I think I might know someone.” You whispered, hand coming up to lace into his hair, and he rumbled happily at the scrape of your nails over his scalp.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” You promised, and he grinned, shifting enough to let his mouth slant across yours, a kiss that was more than overdue. Lifting a hand to sit on his jaw, he pressed into you a little further, one hand still behind the couch, while the other was sliding down to find your waist, the blanket falling away and the movie becoming nothing but background noise as his lips worked softly with your own.

You’d expected hot and sloppy, but he was taking it slower this time, sweet and passionate, not nearly as desperate as you’d been anticipating, and your heart was racing in your chest with the tenderness in which he kissed you. Once the blanket was kicked from your legs, his hand dipped a little lower, smoothing around your lower back, and pulling you in towards him until you could drape a leg over his thighs. Settling into his lap, both of hands were sitting low on your hips, teeth grazing along your lower lip as the what between you both seemed to double, and you pressed a little closer into him.

“Put your hands, just-” You took a hold of his wrists, lowering his hands a little, your forehead pressed to his as you pushed them around until he could hold fistfuls of your ass through your leggings, squeezing tightly, and you keened into his touch. Rocking your hips down into his own, you gasped, his grunt at the feeling being silenced as your lips closed back over his, and he hummed happily when your tongue dragged slowly against his.

For each rock you made down into him, his hips were jumping, small thrust upwards to meet you, and it became more frantic with every little movement. He was growing underneath you, the material of his sweats doing little to hide the hardening cock that seemed to twitch and jump each time you dragged your core along his length, even through the layers of material, and you could feel yourself growing wetter and weather, uncomfortably so the longer your went, but the pressure was perfect, an orgasm already beginning to grow within you.

When the burn for oxygen became too much, he pulled back, lips worked along your jaw slowly, soft sucks that weren’t hard enough to leave bruises but sent sparks of electricity and excitement flooding through you each time, nips at your skin as he worked his way down your neck, until he was biting teasingly at the shoulder with the strap of your top still hanging over your arm, bare skin exposed to him. “You know, not a criticism, just a compliment, but you really got kissing down to an art.”

He chuckled against your skin, a little breathless, but still enough to make you tremble at the feeling, before he was making his way back up to you, nose dragging over your skin until his mouth could brush against yours. “Is that so?”

“Totally.” You mumbled, your hand slipping into his hair to hold onto a fistful as his mouth crashed back into your own, and he put those skills to good use. He all but knocked the oxygen from your lungs with the intensity of it, leaving your head spinning and lungs burning but you were unable to pull away, the addictive way that his mouth worked with your own, so sensual and intimate that you were flaring up with heat, and you finally knew what it felt like when people said there were fireworks in a kiss, because you felt as though the fourth of July was exploding around you.

“Bedroom?”

“Absolutely.” You mumbled, having to tear yourself away from his kisses, diving back in a few times, before finally, you managed to pull yourself away. You took his hands in your own, pulling him up with you as the two of you moved, and his hands found your hips, guiding you in your backwards walking steps as he followed behind you; foreheads pressed together, occasionally pressing sweet kisses to one another, giggles shared into the air between you until you came to a stop in the doorway.

Turning around, you paused, more of a laugh erupting from you.

“First criticism, messy sheets is a turn off.” He sounded confused for a second, mouth leaving where he had been kissing along your neck, his head coming up to take a look, and he huffed a little.

“Right, yeah, forgot about that. Let me just-” He moved away, on side of the bed to straighten the blankets out, pushing the pillows back up to the top end of the bed, and you helped out, smoothing over them until the job was done haphazardly, but at least it least it was no longer messy, and he stood on the opposite side from you, hands on his hips for a second. “Better?”

“Much.” He nodded his head, licking over his lips, and taking the lower one prisoner as his gaze swept over you, His hair was a little messy, cheeks flushed and lips swollen, and you were certain that you looked exactly the same, the tension between the two of you sizzling. You couldn't handle it, the two of you meeting halfway as you knelt on the bed, his body colliding with yours and lips meeting in frenzied kisses as you connected again.

He reached a hand behind his head, tugging his shirt up and away from his body, a delicious display of flexing muscles and veiny forearms as he discarded of it, shaking the hair that flopped down into his face free.

“That was hot.”

“All I did was take off my shirt?” He whispered, pulling back when you tried to kiss him so that he could raise his brows in silent questioning.

“We like that. When you do that whole ‘taking your shirt off with one hand behind your head’ thing. Plus, you just looked good while doing it.” He looked down at himself, before back up to you, hands cupping your face to bring you in closer to him, and he pressed a series of pecks to your lips, until you were laughing lightly and pushing him back with hands spread over his chest.

He followed you as you stood, and you undid the rest of the zip on the hoodie, letting it fall open, and down your arms slowly, and he watched it go, until the material was crumpled in a pile around your feet. Placing your hands on his chest, you pushed him backwards, until his knees were buckling against the mattress and he was sitting down, staring up at you with wide eyes and parted lips, waiting for your next move. With a finger under his chin, you tipped his face upwards, enough to be able to peck his lips, before you were stepping away from him.

Turning away, you heard him shuffling, the ruffling of material and the slight creaking of the bed, before it was silent, and you took a steadying breath. Crossing your arms over your middle, you tugged the satin top up slowly, brushing your own fingers over your skin, and you heard him groan behind you as it hit the floor, hair falling back down your back upon being freed from the material. Hooking your fingers into the edge of your leggings, you peeled them down your legs, bending at the waist, and removing them from your feet, slowly, before turning back to face him, clad only in your panties.

His eyes were half-lidded, and jaw hanging slack, only clad in his boxers now, but he was palming himself through the material as he sat propped up in the pillows, and you rounded to his side of the bed, one of his hands reaching out for you, and you took it, a gentle hold as his fingers weaved with yours.

“How was that?”

“So fucking hot.” He mumbled, the hand that he had been using to rub at his hard cock through his boxers came free, a wet patch left across the front of the pale checkered fabric, precum soaking into them and your thighs clenched at the idea of having that effect on him. Running the tip of one finger under the waistband of your panties, he tugged you a little closer to him still, before snapping the elastic against your skin. “What about these?”

“Figured you might want to do that.”

Your eyes dropped to his mouth, before meeting his gaze again, only a split second slip, but he was smirking, clearly having seen it. Before you could even process what he was doing, his arms had wrapped around your middle, twisting you around and lifting you to lay in the bed beside where he had been, your head in the pillows and his arms holding him up on either side of you, and you panted a little, the yelp that had left you making you breathless.

“Holy shit.”

“Couldn’t help it. You say dirty things and it makes me feel a little wild.” His legs were caging you in, moving lower and lower as he kissed his way over your collarbones, lips and tongue leaving wet trails between your breasts as he lowered himself further and further.

“Wild is good. I like wild.”

“Hm, I hope so.” He whispered the words, tongue grazing along the sensitive skin above your panties, before he was tapping at your hips with his fingers, and you were lifting them for him to shimmy your panties down. Once you were bare before him, you grew a little shy once again, legs snapping shut, and he chuckled, a hand landing on each knee, and he pressed kisses along the tops of your thighs. “Please don’t be shy, gorgeous. You’re so damn beautiful, you have nothing to be shy about.”

Squeezing his hands at your knees, you twitched a little, pushing yourself up onto your elbows to peer down at him, and he grinned, pressing a kiss to your stomach, before leaning up and pressing an equally quick but sweet kiss to your lips.

“Open up your pretty legs for me, yeah?”

You couldn't hold back, the way he was talking to you and touching you, loving caresses that soothed your nerves, and he groaned under his breath as your slick core was revealed to him. Legs bending at the knees, you planted your feet flat on the bedding, and he was able to settle on his stomach between them, hot breath fanning over your core.

His arms wrapped around your thighs, fingertips digging into them roughly, and he rubbed a hand up and down them slowly, the twitching in your gut coming to a still as he still managed to find time and sentience to ease your nerves as he pressed his mouth in sweet kisses along the insides of your thighs, biting a little at the top and chuckling as he felt you jerk in surprised shock. Lacing a hand into his hair just as his mouth moved to close over your core, you tugged lightly, his eyes flickering up to find yours. “What’s wrong, gorgeous? Did I mess something up?”

“No, no, you’re perfect.” Your words were panted out, and you were trembling while holding yourself up, but you shook your mind clear, trying to focus enough to break through the haze. “Just wanted to say thank you. You’re being such a sweetheart, I don’t think I’ve ever felt this confident before, so before my mind completely clears, I wanted to say that.”

He paused, a look flicking over his features to expose that he clearly didn’t expect that, and there was a much more adoring smile on his face as he processed your words. “It’s my pleasure, you’re worth it, and you deserve a guy to treat you like the special and incredible woman that you are.”

You choked a little on your breath, unsure of how to reply, so you swallowed the lump in your throat, nodding your head, before pushing his back down a little. “Okay, enough heart-to-heart crap. You can continue now.”

“As you wish, princess.”

He dragged his tongue once along your core slowly, and you took a sharp inhale of breath, the feeling of a hot and wet mouth working over you was something that you’d sorely missed, and while Joel had gone down on you yesterday too, this would be so much better and you already knew it. Instead of rushed and nervous, it was erotic and confident, sure in your movements, and sure that he could be the best you’d ever had, you could tell just from the way this night was going so far, that these memories would be burned in your mind for the rest of your life.

Rubbing a thumb over your clit, he chuckled at the way your thighs trembled slightly, before he was pulling away, diving in to replace his finger with his mouth. Lips sucking at the little bud, your fingers tightened in his hair, back arching at the feeling, and he licked over the bud, before repeating the process. Again, and again, and then, he was replacing his movements. Tongue flicking out, rapid kitten licks over the bud, and you squealed a little, thighs clamping around his head as you did, and you whined a little.

“Wait, Joel!” He paused after a moment, your entire body still tingling with the feeling of his mouth, but your legs loosened as he pulled them open, brows raising at you, and slick was already glistening on his chin. “Good, but can be better. Start slow, don’t go right in, tease me a little. Speed up when I’m closer, okay?”

“I thought girls hated being teased?”

“We can love it, if you do it right. You’ll know when to speed up, okay? Start slow, add a finger, then another, speed up when I’m getting close.” He nodded his head, a lopsided smile on his face, and he was taking your advice. He started slow, a long and torturous drag of his tongue over your core, and then again, before his tongue circled your entrance for a moment, barely dipping inside long enough to matter, but then he lapped at your core again. Lips sealing around your clit, he sucked harshly, your back arching up from the bed, your free hand finding purchase tangling in the bedding, and you moaned, loudly. “Fuck, yes, Joel. Just like that.”

He groaned into your body, the feeling reverberating along your skin, and one hand moved from your thigh, slipping along and disappearing from your skin until the tip of one nimble digit was circling your entrance, rubbing lightly across your weeping hole. Filthy sounds were already filling the room, and your mind was going completely blank, the only thing you could process right now was the movements of his mouth against you, tongue and lips working in tandem to drive you crazy as you bucked up into him, holding his face against your core as he slurped and sucked at every drop you had to release.

Slipping that finger into you, he had clearly taken our tip on teasing, because he only sunk it within you to the first knuckle, barely present at all, and yet your walls were clamping around him greedily, desperately trying to draw him deeper in as you felt him twist it a little, circling the finger and beginning to stretch you out, crooking it at the knuckle and tugging a little in your entrance as he began to pump it. A cry of his name left you as he bit down on your swollen clit lightly, the bud throbbing in response, and your entire body jumped at the sensation, loving the way he was taking control with it now.

Each time his finger dipped back into you, he sank a little further, his finger and tongue working in harmony, the same pace with their movements, and your entire body was layered in a thin sheen of shining sweat as he took you apart piece by piece. His hips were grinding down into the covers as he worked, the rustling of the covers giving it away, and he was grunting and growling against your every so often, his eyes closed as he enjoyed his motions just as much as you did, and you forced your hand free from him hair as you realised just how tight your fist had gotten. Just when you thought you might be getting used to this feeling, that you might be able to clear the fog in your mind enough to think straight, he sensed it, upping his ministrations.

“Fuck, Joel!” The coil in your stomach wound up ten times tighter in a matter of seconds as that dull tingling at your entrance made itself known, a second finger taking you by surprise as it plunged inside of you, and your back arched up so high your hips followed, borderline screaming as he picked up his pace. “I-I’m going to-”

“Come? Do it, come on, gorgeous. Give me all you got.” Faster movements, the tandem between his fingers and his mouth going to shit, as he continued to work his fingers in and out of you slowly, but his tongue was picking up his pace again. Switching between sucking and licking, you could barely process what was happening each time, and tears lined your eyes as you felt fire beginning to consume you.

Heat flooded your body, bliss filling every cell in your body and coursing through you until it was all-consuming, and you unravelled against him in a fit of squirming screams, his hands holding you to his mouth as he rode you through the pleasure, two fingers stretching you wide and scissoring you open each time, never giving up on his movements until you couldn't take it anymore.

You pushed him away, panting and gasping for breath, and his eyes were blown with lust as he pulled away, cheeks and chin shining with your arousal, your hand falling over your chest, feeling the erratic beating of your heart under your palm as your eyes closed, trying to contain the way you were feeling. Your throat was already scratchy, growing rough from the calls and cries of his name that you’d released.

“Good?”

“Is that even a question?” You teased, and he collapsed down into the bed beside you, wiping the back of his hand over his jaw, before you leaned in to kiss him, taking his lips with your own, and he let out a needy sound into your mouth as you did. He was rubbing at his jaw, pressing his lips lazily with your own as you kissed him, and he pressed you back down into the bed, leaning over you and letting his body press into yours.

One hand moved to his boxers, pushing them down, kicking them away until they were removed from his body. Leaning over you, a dripping cock brushed along your thigh, your leg raising up a little to rub against him, and he grunted into your mouth, biting down on your lower lip in warning, as he rooted through the nightstand to find a condom. Upon retrieving the package, he sat back on his heels, tearing it with his teeth and throwing the wrapper to the ground, a problem to be dealt with later, and he rolled the rubber along his length.

Long and flushed red, his cock was standing tall and proud, and you rubbed your thighs together a little, watching as he pumped himself slowly, eyes dragging over your body. You could see the cogs working in his mind, before he backed away from you entirely. Moving to the switch on the wall, he turned down the lights, leaving them on a little, but lowering them to a more comfortable level.

“Compromise?”

“I can work with that.” You offered, holding your hands out to him, and the bed bounced a little as he came to laying over the top of you. One leg was pressed between yours, and you shuffled, pressing yourself down against the muscle of his thigh, and a deep sound bubbled up from within him as you rode yourself against his thigh, kissing along his neck, and his head tipped back.

“For the record, I like hickies.”

You paused, a beat passing, before your mouth was sealing over the patch where his neck joined his shoulders, and he groaned loudly as you sucked at the skin harshly. Tipping his head back, his arms trembled a little dipping down until your chests were pressed together, and with every rolled of your core against his leg, your chest dragged over his, the friction making your nipples grown perky, and you whimpered into his neck, lapping at the spot you were abusing.

When you were finished, you pressed a sweet kiss over it, purple already beginning to blossom beneath the splotchy red on his pale skin, and he let out a shaky breath. Brushing your thumb over it, you smirked at the mark you’d made, before finally looking back up to him. Reaching a hand between your bodies, you took his cock in your hand, pumping slowly and watching as his jaw dropped slightly, before you were shifting your legs to accommodate his body and lining his length up at your core.

He rocked forwards, sinking into you slowly, and just like that, everything went fuzzy around you once again. It was like he was your only focus, everything was falling away until it was only him that remained, and your hands found his cheeks, pulling him down to kiss you. You were drowning in his touch, his hips nestled against your own as he gave you a moment to adjust to his size with you, that same twinge of an ache you’d felt this morning coming back in full force, but overpowered by the racing lust that was taking over.

When you felt ready, you clenched around him, curling your hips and feeling his cock shift within you, a gasp falling from you as the head of his cock brushed over your g-spot, and he took that chance to slip his tongue into your mouth. Hot and wet, everything felt like it was in overdrive as you lit up, and his hands were pressed into the mattress on either side of your head as he began to shift, hips drawing out of you, before sinking back in, and he took his time, moving slowly and waiting for you to tell him when he could speed up.

Lifting a leg up and onto his hip, he sank even deeper within you, your walls fluttering around him as you let out joint sounds of pure ecstasy, and his movements stuttered for only a moment at the feeling. One hand came down, fingertips digging into the muscle of your thighs so tightly that you’d be speckled with little polka dot bruises come morning, a sinful thought that made you head spin. You felt carefree, for the first time in your life, there was no doubts or anxiety, just the way it felt to be touched and cared for by him, the way his gaze swept so delicately over your face, or the way his lips puckered a little, curling up at the sides in a smile when your mouth pressed to his.

Hooking your hands under his arms, you encouraged him on, nails digging into his skin and dragging tracks into the flesh, his back arching up to push into your touch, and his pace began to pick up. He took his time, building the pace, and you’d never felt like this before. A high you’d never experienced was beginning to set in, your hips moving in time to match his thrusts.

He was panting into your mouth, hot and erotic as your foreheads remained pressed together, his lashes tickling against your cheeks, and every soft moan of your name that he let out made you want to scream out with pure bliss, because the way his voice cracked around your name made everything within you crumble. He made you weak, he made you completely fall apart, and you weren’t sure how or why, yet you found yourself loving it.

It was raw and exposed, your heart and soul open to him, and instead of crushing it like you’d grown to expect from everyone around you, he was taking care of it. You pushed up into him, pleasure surging through you, broken stutters of his name as he fucked into you, hard and fast, driving deep, and the tip of his cock was pressing to your g-spot each time, pinpoint accuracy as you weren't sure if he even knew that he was making stars flash behind your eyes.

“Joel, don’t stop! I’m so close!”

You moved, licking over two fingers, and making to slip them between your bodies to find your clit, to spur your orgasm on as best you could, but as you moved, he lifted a hand, snatching yours in his own and pinning it to the bed, and a loud moan rippled through you from the dominance he asserted. He seemed almost surprised, for only as second, before his brows were raising. “You liked that, huh? Shoulda’ told me.”

“That’s not general advice, you wanted general advice.”

He shook his head, leaning back down to brush the tip of his nose over your own. “Maybe I’d prefer it if you tailored the advice to yourself specifically. Tell me how to drive you wild.”

“Just keep doing what you’re doing, I like it when you take control of me a little bit.” He nodded his head, seeming to catch on, and he sat back leaving you laying in the bed as the angle changed. Two fingers prodded at your lips, and he raised his brows, waiting for you to draw them into your mouth, wetting the digits thoroughly for him. When he deemed them sufficiently slick, he pulled them back, trailing them down along your body, before pressing down roughly onto the neglected bud between your thighs, crying out for attention to push you over the edge.

As you tumbled into that bliss, he continued going, until your body was jerking and quivering underneath him, and you were crying out his name, clenching so hard around his cock that his head fell back as he gripped at your thigh with his other hand, kneeling between your parted legs and tucked snugly between your spasming walls. “Jeez, you’re so fucking tight.”

He collapsed down over you, sweaty and warm, covering your body with his entirety as he tried to catch his breath, and your eyes were still rolled back in your head, coming back to focus as you slipped back down to earth from the heaven he'd taken you to. “That was incredible.”

“You bet your cute little ass it was.”

You chuckled, feeling him shuffle, pressing a kiss to your shoulder. Locking your knees on either side of his hips, you flipped him over, his eyes wide as he found himself on his back, your hand finding his cock as you sank back down, shivering at the feeling as the aftermath of your last orgasm was still racing through you, and he let out a long and deep sound that vaguely resembled your name, hands finding your waist and pulling you the rest of the way down as he fucked up into you.

“You don’t have to, really-”

“You know, you’re pretty much the first guy I’ve ever been with who didn’t come first, and who genuinely cared about my pleasure.” Your nails scratched over his chest a little, making him shudder at your touch, before you were leaning down, hair drawing around you both, and he stared up at you in awe. “I want to make you feel good, too.”

He nodded, a hand tangling toughly in your hair, and he pulled you backwards, sitting up with you in his lap so that your legs could wrap around his waist more fully, your arms looping his neck, holding you as close as he possibly could. You whined at the feeling of your stinging scalp, loving the way he was manhandling you now, and he knew it too, his lips descending to your throat as he used his other hand to guide the movements of your hips.

“Tell me what to do, I don’t go on top a lot. Tell me what’s good, that’s what you’re supposed to do.” You were pleading with him, desperate to know how you could make him feel as good as you’d made him.

“What you’re doing right now is good.” He mumbled, but as you rolled your hips back down into his with what little space there was, his lips moving over your body until he could lean you back, taking a nipple between his lips and sucking one perky bud into his mouth. You cried out his name, his fist tangled into your hair to hold you still, and you tried to form thoughts, your first attempts at speaking coming out as broken stutters.

“Please, Joel..”

“Please what, gorgeous? Tell me what you need.” He cooed the words out, and you let out a desperate sound, your hips slamming down into his, and your hands found his chest, pushing him back into the bed, hearing the rush of breath he let out.

“Tell me what you want.”

He stared at you, blinking those beautiful brown eyes for a second, before giving in. “Honestly, I just want you to ride me like a pornstar. Go fucking wild, it’s so fucking sexy. When your tits bounce, and you slam yourself onto my cock, hair messy and a little sweaty, that's what I want.”

You nodded, swallowing thickly and bracing yourself on his chest, before you moved more solidly onto your knees, beginning to bounce against him. His jaw dropped, watching the movements of your chest, watching as you leaned back to show off the bouncing of your breasts before him as you built your confidence, and after getting past your anxieties, you were faced with the raging build of confidence that came with being on top.

He was staring at you like you’d put the lights in the sky, and you were, for once, glad that there were lights on to see him and for him to see you, to watch every movement you were making, because pure thrill was written on his face, adoration and lust as he stared, before you were taking one of his hands. Dragging it over your body, you sealed his fingers around one of your tits, pushing into his hands when he took control, fingers tweaking with your nipples, and he raised the other to do that same.

You were close, and you could tell he was too, the breathless way that he was beginning to chant your name on repeat, the way you were sure that the feeling of his cock tapping against every spot within you was going to be burned into your mind for the rest of your life, and the look on his face as he finally neared that peak.

“You look so fucking good. Taking what you want, riding me, absolutely perfect up there.”

“Only because that's how you want to see me, right now.” You whispered, and he shook his head, his hands finding your hips, waiting for you to lift yourself up, and as you did, he slammed you back down onto him, meeting you as he fucked up into you, and your body fell forwards in shock, barely catching yourself before your forehead hit his own, breath shared between you once again. His feet adjusted on the bed, bending at the knee to sit flat and he set a brutal pace, driving the both of you towards your final peak and he drilled into you.

Your eyes crossed, vision spotting, and a scream of his name was torn from you with force as you crashed into yet another earth-shattering orgasm at his touch, the sound of his cries of complete joy seeming muffled as he chased after you over the cliff, falling into orgasmic bliss. He rode the pair of you out, strained and weakening movements as your bodies trembled together, until finally, he stopped, completely sent off all energy, and you collapsed against his chest.

His heart was thudding against his chest under your cheek, your nails scratching lightly at the patch of dark hairs between lightly defined pecs, and he wrapped his arms around you. Rolling you to the side, he was reluctant to leave the bed, letting out a loud sound of distaste ta having to do so, but didn’t travel far, simply far enough to undo the rubber on his cock and tie it up, wrapping it in some tissues and dropping the crumpled heap into the bin.

When he came back over, he lay down beside you on his back, one hand under his head and the other stretched out towards you. As you lay on your stomach, shuffling closer to him, you lifted yourself onto your elbows, peering down at him with a small smile. “So, that was, like, the best sex ever. Right?”

You grinned, head ducking to hide the bashful expression you wore, but you were laughing nonetheless. “Ever.”

“I wish all girls were as cool as you. Like, sex would just be so much better if everyone just had that kind of communication, because, holy shit, that was mindblowing.” His hand came up beside his head, making an exploding noise as his fingers made the motion, as though his head really had exploded, and you grinned, feeling his fingers brush over your skin as he lowered it back down.

Quiet fell between you both, but it was comfortable, nice and easy-going, and you weren’t sure how to break the silence now, but neither was he, though it didn’t matter. When the temperatures that had risen in your body during your sinful act began to come back down, you found yourself cold once again, tucking yourself under the blankets and curling in a little closer to him, fingers brushing through his hair to distract yourself as he lay, staring up at you.

“Y’know, you said something, during it all..”

“You told me to give you advice! Don’t get pissy about it now.” Your joke was taken in good spirits, a loud laugh leaving him, and the burning gaze he’d mixed you with was broken for a few moments as his eyes closed to revel in his amusement, but when the laughter died down, he was looking at you again, with just as much intensity.

“Not that. You said you only thought you only looked good because I wanted you to look good.” His hand found your cheek, forcing you to find his gaze as he spoke. “That wasn’t true. You’re so fucking beautiful, and just because one dumbass broke your heart, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t think of yourself as not being worthy. It only leads to more heartbreak. Don’t let his stupid actions take away from your value.”

“You know, you’re real wise on all this stuff.” His thumb brushed over your lips, and you puckered your lips to press a kiss to the pad of the finger. “Who broke your heart, Joel?”

“What makes you think I’ve had my heart broken?”

“Takes one to know one.” You whispered, and he let out a little sigh, gaze trailing off to stare at the ceiling.

“Her name was Aimee. We were together in high-school. We got into different colleges, and I was so sure we could make a long-distance thing work.” You cringed a little, keeping it internal, already guessing where this was going, but letting him talk. “We did phone calls and video chats, and I went to see her so often, every chance I could, in first year. But then second year came, and everything got busy, and I didn’t get to see her as often as I would’ve liked. I was waiting for the summer break to go and see her. When I got there, things were different, she told me it had changed, that she’d fallen for someone else and just didn’t know how to tell me. She figured we’d just fizzle out, that we had been fading. We broke up officially, but, it didn’t hurt her as much as it hurt me.”

“I’m so sorry, Joel.”

“That’s alright.” He murmured, fingers tracing up and down your arm, and you settled into a comfortable quiet once again.

You were hesitant to admit it to yourself, but you were growing rather fond of the man, your hookup having become so much more. The snow, the cold weather, two broken hearts and a stupid hook up site, and suddenly, you’d found someone who had managed to change your life in a lot of little ways, all in just twenty-four hours.

You turned, finding the man already watching you, lips curled up in a sweet smile and eyes lazily drooped, simply watching you as the thoughts and feelings raced through your mind, and yet, under his gaze, they all seemed to go silent. The worries, the constant surge of ‘what ifs’ and ‘maybes’ all faded away, and you reached out a finger, tapping at the tip of his nose.

His expression somehow managed to morph into something even sweeter, practically giving you a toothache as his nose scrunched up adorably, before he was folding both hands under his head, moving to tangle his legs with yours, and simply sighing a little.

Golden and low lighting made his features seemed a little sharper, shadows on his face highlighting his jaw, cheekbones standing prominent and hair darker, and you knew just how soft it was, strands pushed back out of his face by you. The dark mark on his neck was making itself known now, and you were sure your own body would soon be littered in them, and you would check them all out with pride in the morning.

You turned to look at him again, drawing yourself back out of the spiral in your mind you’d once again fallen victim to, and meeting his gaze with a heatless huff. “What are you staring at?”

“Just.. you.” His brows pulled together a little, eyes sweeping across your face again in a way that made you feel raw and on the edge of your emotions. He lifted a hand, pushing your hair away behind your ears, before settling a hand over your jaw, and stroking his thumb across your skin slowly and soothingly.

“Yeah, well, don’t.” You whispered, voice cracking, and your gaze left his, but his touch never fell away, even when you tried to duck your head. “Don’t look at me like that, not unless you plan to act on it.”

“Oh, I would love to act on it. When this snow melts, I’d like to act on it properly.”

“Like.. a date?” You questioned, eyes flicking up to his for only a moment, and he was beaming what you did, toothy smile showing off his joy for only you to see.

“Exactly like a date, if you’ll have me?”

“Depends.” You murmured, shuffling in closer to him for warmth. “Can I share the bed with you tonight, or are you kicking me back out to the couch?”

He wrapped you up in his arms, pulling you down into his chest as the pair of you laughed, cocooning yourselves in the blankets with a series of rolls and twists, until you pressed up tightly together and locked in such a way. “There, now you’re not going anywhere.” He dipped down, pressing a kiss to your lips, one that you were eager to reciprocate. “Me and the bed are all yours, gorgeous.”

“I like the sound of that.”

[tweedlydumbtweedlydoo]

Nowhere | Rafe Cameron x reader

Requested by MEEEEEE lol / Summary: Rafe has nowhere else to go after Ward kicks him out of the house and he finds himself on the doorstep of your house. What will the rest of the pogues think of your new roommate?  

A/N: do i have like 20 requests on my list right now? Yes. Am I working on one that I thought of instead? Yes and i’m sorry but I hope you guys like it! xx

Tag list is at the end. Let me know if you want to be added xx

**MASTERLIST**

Requests: {OPEN} CLOSED

** Rules for Requesting **

** Who I Write For **

********************************************************************************************NOT MY GIF, CREDIT TO OWNERS

It was way passed one o clock in the morning when you woke up to someone knocking on the door. “no... shut up..” You groan, turning over and pulling your pillow over your ear to block out the knocking. 

Part of you should have probably been worried to be woken from your slumber to someone knocking, but you lived on the cut and lived in the marsh where you didn’t have anything worth stealing. You should have also been worried about being home alone, but your father worked an oil rig off shore and he wasn’t home months at a time, so you were use to being home alone. 

The person continued to knock and you muttered some curse words before finally tossing the blankets off you and heading toward your front door, “I’m coming! Jesus..” You had to rub the sleep out of your eyes to make sure you weren’t dreaming and to make sure your mind playing tricks on you because this had to be a dream. Rafe Cameron is standing at your door. 

“I had no where else to go.” He croaks as he lets his shoulders fall, “He kicked me out.” 

You and Rafe weren’t for the usual pogue vs kook thing like everyone else on the island was. You’d even go far enough to call yourself friends. Friends who’d had a few intimate moments. 

You ushered him into the house and closed the door behind him before wrapping your arms around him in a hug. It was then that he let everything out and started to cry in your arms. “I’ll never be good enough for him...” 

You two stayed up talking for the longest where he’d explained what went down before Ward kicked him out. You offered your place to stay for as long as he needed, but he would need to pull his own weight, which meant trying to find a job. He turned his nose up at the suggestion, “Me? Rafe Cameron working?” 

“If you want to eat and live then yeah. You, Rafe Cameron working.” You laughed, shoving his shoulder, “It’s called not everyone has a rich daddy.”  

He groaned as he fell back on the bed, “How horrid!” 

“I do it almost everyday! It’s not that bad.” You laid down next to him, “I’ll ask around, see if I can find you something.” 

He turns his head to look at you, “Thank you. For letting me crash and offering to help find a job.” 

“I’m just paying you back for saving my ass that night.” You’d been at the wrong place, wrong time and was about to be arrested for it when Rafe had appeared out of no where and talked to the officer. Telling the officer you’d been with him the whole time and weren’t anywhere near what had happened. 

He turns on his side and props himself up on his arm, “Couldn’t let you go to jail. You’re too pretty for jail.” 

You can’t help but let your heart flutter at his words. He was serious with his compliment but you weren’t sure how to react. Deciding to play it off, you playfully roll your eyes, “And you’re too pretty to live on the streets.” You laugh and reach over to turn off your light, “Let’s go to sleep.” 

~ 

“What the hell is this!” Kie screeched as she’d opened the door to your bedroom, the pogues behind her. You all had plans today to go fishing, but you weren’t waiting on the dock when they arrived so they decided to see what the hold up was. They didn’t expect to find you curled in bed with Rafe Cameron. 

“Shit!” You quickly sit up, remembering the plans you all had, “It’s not what it looks like.” 

“Not what it looks like?!” JJ asks. 

“Looks like you’re in bed with Rafe Cameron!” John B adds. 

You groan and throw the covers off you, getting out of bed, shooing them out the room, “I’ll explain.” 

Rafe groaned as he woke up, “What’s going on?” 

“Nothing.. just go back to bed.” You said softly, pushing the pogues out of the room. “I’ll handle this.” 

He watches as you push the pogues out of your room and shut the door. Uh oh. 

~ 

“What the hell y/n? Have you lost your mind?” Kie asks as soon as y’all make it to the living room. 

“Out of everyone, Rafe Cameron?” Pope asks, “He’s given us shit for months!” 

“Like I said before, it’s not what it looks like. We didn’t sleep together.” You head into the kitchen to make you a cup of coffee, the pogues following. 

“Then why is Rafe Cameron in your bed?” John B asks. 

You debate telling them the truth; “Can you guys just trust me when I tell you it’s not what it looks like?” 

“No, we can’t. Not after everything that asshole has done to us.” JJ answers, “He’s a snake and a kook. There shouldn’t be a reason for him in your bed.” 

“Okay first of all, who is in my bed is none of your concern.” You warn JJ with a point of a finger, “You’ve fucked almost every girl on the island and every touron who gives you a look, so you can’t say shit. and second, he’s a friend who needed a place to crash, so I gave him one.” 

John B scoffs at that, “What Tanneyhill didn’t have enough rooms for him?” 

“No asshole, his dad kicked him out. You happy now?” You grab the sugar and cream and set them on the counter. 

“It’s Rafe Cameron, he could have gone to anyone else on this island. I mean anyone, he’s friends with everyone. But.. why you?” Pope asks with suspicion. 

“Yeah, y/n. Why would he come to you, a pogue he is supposed to hate looking for a place to stay?” Kie asks, crossing her arms over her chest. 

“You know that night you all ditched me after shit went down at the Boneyard? Yeah well, Rafe was the one who talked me out of being arrested.” You look up at them, “He’s the one who saved my ass while you all just ditched.” 

“We couldn’t get arrested either. You could have ran.” JJ scoffs, “We all did.” 

“They already had it surrounded by the time I reached the tree lines.” 

“Okay but that still doesn’t answer the question of why you.” John B says, his hands on the island in front of him. 

“I don’t know john b maybe he sees me as a friend?! If you haven’t noticed, he’s stopped fucking with you guys, including me. The kooks who mess with us aren’t his buddies. He’s a good guy, if you’d just get to know him. If you’d just give him a chance.” 

Kie gives a half-hearted laugh, “Get to know him.. Yeah okay. You mean sleep with him, don’t you? You’ve slept with him?” 

You step up at Kie, “Like I told JJ, who I fuck is none of your concern.” 

“Alright. let’s just calm down.” Pope mutters, stepping between the two of you, “Kie, y/n is right. Who she.. sleeps with isn’t our concern.” 

“Yeah but y/n you should have told us about this. About you and Rafe. Maybe it wouldn’t have come with such a shock.” John B states with a shrug. 

“It would have been the same reaction you all have now. What does that matter? You all would still be scolding me for getting even close to Rafe or thinking of him as a friend.” 

“She’s right though.” JJ mutters and gives a shrug when the pogues look at him, “I mean it’s the truth. You guys really think we’d be okay with it if she told us it from the beginning?” 

“Fine whatever, okay then why is he here? Why’d his dad kick him out?” 

“I don’t-” 

“Because I didn’t want anything to do with him or his business.” Rafe interrupts, walking into the kitchen and to your side at the counter, “He wanted me to take over the company, be just like him and I said no.” He glances down at you then back up at the pogues, “Plus, I told him I was in love with someone he didn’t approve of.” 

~ 

“You’re.. in love with her?” JJ asks, pointing to you. 

You’re looking up at Rafe in disbelief, “Me?” 

He scratches the back of his neck, “yeah.. I mean this wasn’t how I wanted to tell you...” 

“I love you too..” You whisper with a smile and pull him in for a kiss. 

“oh no.. don’t do it.” JJ groans covering his eyes. 

“Well shit.” John B mutters. 

“I guess pogues vs kooks is over now?” Pope asks. 

Rafe smiles into the kiss, holding you against his body, “I guess I’m a pogue now that I’ve been kicked out?” 

You shook your head with a laugh, “Oh honey, you’re definitely still a kook.” 

“yeah no you’ve never worked a real job in your life.” Kie laughs, “You’re a kook.” 

What else was there to say to you? He loved you, you loved him. The pogues were your friends and even though they’d have to get use to it, they’d still support you and Rafe’s relationship because that’s what friends are for. 

Rafe Cameron // Drew Starkey taglist: @pm-my-hubbies​ , @timotaychalabae , @fratboystark​ , @fangirlvoice​ , @saraholland03​ , @starkeymemories​

All my works tag list: @blossomreed , @mggstyles  , @simonsbluee , @thewolf-and-thesheep , @obxrafe ( @obxrafejjwhore ), @abbiesthings , @itstaskeen , @reniescarlett​

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[phoenixyfriend]

Rex and Anakin Raise a Family: Part Three

Part One, Part Two -- Chrono

---------------

The house they’ve acquired has two bedrooms. They only use one.

(There’d been panic, that first night, waking up alone. He’d shaken and gasped and felt his heart beat out of his chest, unable to move until something gave. Nothing did.)

(The General had felt it, had woken up from Rex’s own panic and rushed in to remind him that he still had someone left, and Rex had snapped out of his fear and into his grief.)

(He’d bottled it back up by morning, but they didn’t sleep apart anymore.)

The bed is big enough for two people to sleep apart, if with an unfortunate tendency to smack hands across faces in one’s sleep. There’s room on the floor for the crib, and a desk in the corner that neither of them have used yet. The armoire that the house came with is beautifully crafted, but empty save for Anakin’s outer robe. What little they’ve bought so far has been for the twins, and that’s all sorted with military precision into the drawer chest.

It’s nearly first light when one of the twins start fussing. Rex had been ready to wake up anyway, and rolls out of bed before Anakin can fully come out of drowsing. He makes his way over to the shared crib, finds that it’s Leia making noise, and picks her up.

“Buir’s got you,” he mutters, carefully bouncing her as he makes his way back to the bed. He hopes, however futile it may be, that Luke won’t hear her across the room.

“Rex?” Anakin mutters, fighting his way awake.

“Go back to sleep, General, I’ve got this,” Rex tells him.

Anakin ignores him, which is patently unsurprising. The man leverages himself up, rubbing sleep from his eyes. “Give ‘er here.”

“General, I’ve got it,” Rex insists. “Go back to sleep.”

His general scoots back to lean against the headboard and starts tugging open his sleep shirt. “It’s been a week, Captain.”

Oh. That.

...his chest does look swollen. Rex hesitates to call them anything approaching ‘breasts,’ especially since Anakin had confirmed that he still identified as undeniably male, but there’s definitely some bulge there that wasn’t before. It’s not quite enough for the nipple to point down the way Rex is pretty sure most breastfeeding mothers’ do, but there’s something.

Rex hesitates. “Do you feel... uh, full?”

Anakin smiles, bags under his eyes. He reaches out for his daughter. “Enough to give it a try.”

When Leia is in his arms, Anakin carefully guides her little head to where she can latch on to one side. It’s a little awkward, given the aforementioned lack of heft making it point out instead of down, but she gets the hang of it after a few seconds. Anakin makes a face once the suckling starts in earnest, but rubs at Leia’s head and mutters encouragement at her nonetheless.

“Feels weird?” Rex asks, shifting back until he can lean against the headboard as well, shoulder to shoulder with his general.

“Yeah, kinda,” Anakin says. “Good weird, though. Like I’m doing something right.”

“The pamphlet mentioned that breastfeeding usually releases hormones in both the parent and child to encourage connection, right?” Rex paraphrases. “Maybe that’s it.”

“Yeah,” Anakin says.

Rex watches the man start to smile softly, an expression that’s been damned rare since this whole mess started. He’s happy for his general to find happiness in his children, if nothing else.

“You called yourself buir,” Anakin says softly, adjusting Leia a little as she hits at his chest a little. “Good.”

“You said I was family for them,” Rex says. He reaches out and brushes a finger over Leia’s cheek. He can’t help his little smile anymore than Anakin could. “So, yeah, I’m going to encourage that.”

There’s little noises coming from the crib again, soon after. Rex gets up and fetches Luke, whispers nonsense comfort at him until he gets back in the bed, and then glances at Anakin’s chest with doubt. The meaning is clear enough.

“Leia’s almost done, and they’re small,” Anakin assures him. “I can hold both. They’ll probably need a bottle later, though.”

“Not enough production capacity?”

“I’ve got twins, Rex.”

They get Luke settled easily enough, and then a few minutes later, Leia’s done.

Anakin doesn’t pass her back over immediately, just stares down, unfocused and silent.

“Sir?”

Anakin doesn’t budge.

Rex hopes this is just Force osik again. He puts a hand on Anakin’s shoulder and squeezes.

The man inhales sharply, eyes watering. “Oh.”

“General.”

“I--a vision. I don’t usually get them when I’m awake, and--oh, honey, you are going to look so much like your mother,” Anakin whispers, staring at Leia with teary adoration. “You’re going to be lovely as the stars and twice as dangerous, yes you are.”

Good things, then. They’ve had too much bad news for Rex to take this as anything other than a positive. He reaches out with both hands, and Anakin reluctantly hands a baby over.

“Hello, sweetheart,” Rex tells her, and feels Anakin hitch a wet laugh next to him. “Do you think we should let your Papa rest? I do. Let’s get you dressed for the day while he finishes up with your brother.”

“Papa?” Anakin asks wryly, adjusting Luke in his arms.

“Easier for them to say the first few years, and I liked the way it sounded when you said it a few days ago,” Rex says, shifting to his feet. “That or ‘Daddy,’ but I figured she looks like the type to say Papa.”

“Hm,” Anakin says, his eyes far away. “I guess there wasn’t... I didn’t spend much time in the creche, and nobody was really calling anyone a father.”

“Tubies,” Rex says, but doesn’t elaborate. He focuses on changing Leia into a lavender onesie, and how she glares up at him as fiercely as a rancor. Here and now, trooper. There’s lives counting on you.

“You want to change Luke while I handle breakfast?” Anakin asks, coming up behind him on too-quiet feet.

“Sounds like a plan, sir,” Rex says. He feels a hand on his elbow, and turns a shade.

“I’m stable, now,” Anakin says, quiet and guilty. “I can handle the twins for the day. Mourn your brothers, Captain.”

“I’m...” he isn’t sure how. “We need to figure out money, how we’re going to support--”

“Rex,” Anakin says, stepping closer and looking down with eyes that are just as emotionally exhausted as Rex feels. “Please. You handled things while I was out of it, so just... let me return the favor. I’m not going to break today. Let yourself have a moment.”

“I can’t, sir.”

“I could make it an order,” Anakin says quietly. “If... if that would help.”

Rex’s eyes stay fixed on his hands, still and unseeing.

“I need to repaint my armor,” he says, because it’s all he can. “But I don’t have paint.”

“What color do you need?” Anakin asks.

“Grey,” he says. “Black.”

He brushes the backs of his knuckles on Leia’s cheeks. “I’ll... keep some of the blue and white.”

The plastoid would get him laughed out of any Mandalorian bar, even now before the clone armies are a twinkle in anyone’s eye, but it’s his. And he needs to have it mean something more than just his legion. The 501st doesn’t even exist, so the colors only mean what the Mandalorians say, and--and what meaning Rex gives them.

He’s not even Mando’ade, not really.

“Rex?”

“Would you be willing to go into town with me?” Rex asks, his voice catching and cracking on the words. “When I buy the paint.”

“Of course,” Anakin says. “Do you want to go today?”

“I... yeah. That would be nice.”

“Then we’ll go today. After breakfast.”

---------------

Armor colors and meanings for Mandalorians, per Wookiepedia: Gray=Mourning a Lost Love (which I am interpreting as including non-romantic love) Black=Justice Blue=Reliability White= A New Start