#yes i’m on my bullshit what about it

[heyclickadee]

The more I think about The Bad Batch as a complete show but incomplete story, the more I think that if they’re doing what I think they could be doing, the more I think it could work really well from a storytelling perspective. So well that I’m actually annoyed about it.

[j-esbian]

i lost the post but i saw someone talking about how some of y’all act like being weird is a choice and like. YEAHHHHHHH.

that’s fine, it might be for you. but i just live like this and don’t know any other way. like yeah i’ve worked customer service, i can do innocuous small talk, but anything beyond that, i don’t understand what i’m missing. and it’s frustrating to see the tonal disconnect especially from people who are like “uwu embrace weirdness!!” where they’re like. dressing quirky and talking about bugs and listening to obscure music and eschewing small talk to ask Deep Questions on the first date and unlearning their tendency to not infodump. and generally have an idea of what Weirdness is supposed to look like. idk man some of us wake up and get out of bed and can’t figure out why the rest of their coworkers chitchat with each other but when they join the conversation it dies.

weirdness is value neutral. let’s stop trying to turn it into a badge because quite frankly, it’s not a choice for everyone. it’s fucking exhausting to never be on the same wavelength as other people and they’re going to react the way they do and label you the way they will without any conscious actions on your end. it’s difficult to talk about this without feeling like you’ll be dismissed as immature, a teenager whining “no one understands me” but the thing is. sometimes you don’t grow out of feeling alone and different, and there’s no good way to talk about it without feeling like people will think you’re just fishing for pity.

[mosscreeper-ao3]

Y’all ever look at the trauma you gave a character while editing and realize something about yourself?

[archduke-enver-gortash]

posting on here is like my sisyphean boulder i'm constantly rolling tbh

[cuteniaarts]

Here *throws random and actually much more important than I realised at first OC redesign at you after two and a half years since the OG*

Meifeng, Ming-Hua’s cousin! I just randomly remembered that she exists while putting together my OC family tree and since the only art I have of her is… nearly 3 years old and mediocre at best, and Kat and I have recently spent so much time focusing on Red Lotus siblings, I thought “Hey, why not redraw her? Just because she’s a cousin and not a sister doesn’t make her any less special than Lien-Hua, Summiya, Aiza or Haya!” (On that note… Nia give someone a brother challenge. The only one that counts is Aiza and she’s only a brother half the time)

Some headcanons about her, both new and old (the old copy-pasted over and slightly edited to save everyone the second hand embarrassment of going to look at my old art), which will go under the cut because this has gotten LONG:

Old:

Older than Ming-Hua by around 10 years

Her dad is the older half-brother of Ming-Hua's mom who’s… not the most fond of their side of the family

Has never left her home in the Foggy Swamp Water Tribe

Master healer, specialises in children. Can't have any of her own because of the high pollution levels in the swamp which is why she puts all those motherly instincts into teaching and caring for kids

Got a scar on her leg while saving Ming-Hua from some wild swamp creature when the latter was a child who was absolutely convinced she could handle everything herself and never listened to anyone. Ming-Hua still insists she had everything under control that day

She tried to understand Ming-Hua's perspective on things, she really did, but ultimately tribe mentality and fear for her cousin’s safety, believing her not to be nearly as capable as she claims to be, won over

Attempted to stop Ming-Hua from running away but was, obviously, unsuccessful

Was the one consoling Nuying after Ming-Hua left

Helped Suiren learn waterbending and held genuine affection for the girl, although she ultimately refused when Suiren begged for the chance for her and Midori to escape from Haya and live with the tribe. She thought that while Suiren would most likely adjust well, Midori was simply too Gaoling to survive in a place as dark, damp and isolated as the Swamp. She regrets that decision every day since she found out Suiren became an assassin

Mourned Ming-Hua more than anyone else in the tribe when informed of her death

New:

Was the one who babysat Ming-Hua a lot when Nuying was going through one of her depressive episodes after Cadeo left, and Ming-Hua actually enjoyed spending time with her because she was a lot less overbearing and protective than her mother. Was the first person to start calling her Ming. Sometimes Ming-Ming, but Ming-Hua had a tendency to deliver a very hard kick to the shins every time she tried that

Never left Nuying’s side when she got sick in the years following Ming-Hua’s disappearance, no matter how much everyone, including her own father, told her to stay away, there’s nothing she can do to help her. In her final moments, Nuying was delirious with fever and called out for Ming-Hua. Meifeng didn’t have the heart to remind her that her daughter left so instead let her hair down, covered her own hand in water and told Nuying that she was “right here, mom. I’m right here” and stayed like that until Nuying passed

When Ming-Hua returned, Meifeng was the one to break the news to her. Later, when Ming-Hua asked how and when it happened, she couldn’t quite stop herself from snapping at her because she should have been there, Meifeng shouldn’t have had to pretend to be her so her mother could die without worrying about where her daughter was. Their relationship never really fully recovered after that fight

Still, she had met Suiren when she was little on the rare occasions when the Red Lotus passed through the Swamp and Ming-Hua chose to take her daughter to visit the tribe. She never met Midori, but she did see Ming-Hua pregnant with her once

Didn’t know about Ming-Hua’s imprisonment until an 11-year-old Suiren told her because world news don’t reach into the heart of the Swamp. She just thought they had decided to stop visiting. The news crushed her but… a part of her couldn’t help but go “you should have fucking listened to me when I told you to stay, then this wouldn’t have happened”

Her teaching Suiren waterbending involved mostly the basics of combat (she herself doesn’t know much of it since she’s a healer), plantbending and healing. Suiren reached her level of mastery and proficiency as well as figured out icebending on her own through sheer determination and spite (she’s so much like her mama 🥹🥹🥹)

Is the only one from the tribe Suiren had ever confessed to about being an assassin. That knowledge broke her heart and she spent all those years absolutely terrified that Suiren would meet Ming-Hua’s fate. When Suiren stopped visiting at one point (when she left for her mission to kill Kuvira, got injured, recovered at ATI, reunited with her parents, broke Kuvira out and started living with her, etc etc) she had assumed that it really did happen, until Suiren randomly showed up one day with Kuvira in tow (Meifeng did not approve bc of the whole spirit vine thing 😅)

Absolutely reunited with Ming-Hua at some point and it was an extremely emotional moment

Ripped Cadeo a new one when he suddenly appeared looking for his daughter after 45+ years after it became common knowledge that the RL are all alive and no longer wanted by the law

All in all… quite an interesting character that I really should do something with at some point, bc how come Ming-Hua’s family is the only one to get 0 attention in our discussions?? #justiceformeifeng2024

[dontforgetoctober3rd]

Forever stuck on hellblr mobile so pretty please just scroll past thank you! 🙏🏽

Another mini Rhaemond drabble! As always, set in a happy AU where no Dance of Dragons occurs! 😊

———————-

Aemond and Rhaena at a feast, a few weeks after their wedding, just chatting. OK, ACTION:

Rhaena often found herself watching him, this stoic and alert husband of hers.

She thought him rather like a cat.

Ready. Observant. Elegant and Beautiful. So deadly, yet here Aemond was standing at the edge of the dance floor watching with a faint smile as Lucerys attempted a waltz with his new betrothed, some granddaughter of Lord Beesbury’s (who was unfortunately very inept at it. It mattered little to Lucerys, who seemed to relish in being able to save her in that moment, if only from her own two feet. )

“I do wonder,” Rhaena said, approaching Aemond and taking his arm. “If they have said the words to each other yet..it has been almost a month since she arrived at court. What do you think?”

Aemond scoffed. “Not a chance. He isn’t the least bit tactful. Probably thinks she isn’t there yet, even though it is quite obvious that *she* is.”

“Oh? And it’s obvious to you?”

“Has been for two weeks now. Speaking of which, Baela is more than likely with child again. Jace has ordered crate fulls of strawberries once more.”

“Hmm, she told me her moon blood was upon her?”

Aemond sipped from his wine, offering Rhaena some. “Well, she lies, my dearest. Rhaenyra is cross with Daemon, by the way. For what reason, however, I have yet to see. Best avoid them for the time being.”

They often passed the time like this, Aemond filling her in and Rhaena simply absorbing the information. He would rather throw himself from the tallest tower of the keep than be referred to as such but Rhaena thought him quite the gossip. Aemond insisted it was “surveillance”.

“So when do you think he will say it?” Rhaena asked, her attention back to Lucerys and his lady. Her own betrothal with Lucerys had ended amicably, both admitting that while they cared for one another it was not in the way that Daemon or Rhaenyra did and certainly not the way that Aemond and herself felt about each other.

“When the poor sod realizes how different it is, obviously. Then he will understand why it’s necessary to say the words.”

Rhaena was puzzled. “Different..? Between myself and her?” No bitterness was in her words, just complete curiosity. She had zero idea what her husband was talking about, this “difference”...had there been a section of his conversation she missed? “What difference does he need understanding of?”

Aemond smiled at Rhaena. “When he understands how different it is...loving someone who loves you back...then he will not hesitate to say it. It will not matter what they are doing or where they are, he will say it then and there.” He kissed her hand, sipping from his cup and kept his eye glued to hers.

“I love you.” He said simply.

While with his words he may well have been saying the sky was blue or that Valyrian steel cut better than regular steel, as if his love for her was an indisputable and commonplace fact of life...his eye was full of conviction and emotion.

And despite her fondness of gallantry and romance, the way he said it thrilled her more than any of the flowery and overly simpering confessions she had received from men when she had been at the Vale. Because it was *his* way. Her Aemond.

Who she, too, loved back.

[louiswilliamtomlinsons]

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[explanationpoint]

note to self: if you’re a trans woman and you become famous, tell people some bs about how you’re not actually trans despite transitioning. it’ll make everyone like you more.

[banyanas]

While I’m here, I think a vastly overlooked character trait for Andrias is cowardice, specifically emotional and self-reflective cowardice. I aint about ignoring it it to make him more sympathetic! I think he's much tastier with it actually. The incredible refusal to even take a shallow step out of the like... villainous acts sunk cost fallacy until he’s dug himself deeper and deeper to the point where he’s in an ACTUAL deep hole of it. Like idk man capability in combat and the skill to long-term manipulate has nothing to do with yknow not having Moral Backbone Scoliosis.

(Something also worth noting that is a Very Corrupt Deed on specifically Andrias’ part is the blatantly hierarchal and very imbalanced/abused caste system (Don’t think we forgot the ‘Her and her kind will need to be kept in line’ dialogue) that’s been pretty deeply ingrained since he kickstarted it a thousand years ago.

That was all Andrias. No Core crown, no coercion from Aldrich to instate it. It’s all a personal grudge over a betrayal babey! Frankly the Core doesn’t give a singular shit about that stuff either before or after Andrias was like lol let’s do some species based class divisions- its whole deal was 1. hubris and fear of death/irrelevancy and 2. the March of the Glorious Empire etc etc. Likely cared way less about handling the civilian bulk of the world, that’s what it has kings and queens for- it’s got bigger fish to fry.)

[stylishanachronism]

I’m still putting citations in like….. the actual essay portion of this thing but seriously is it reasonable to assume that the duc’s household is in charge of major road upkeep?

Like I am doing stupid math about the tax issue and obviously it’s not something that comes up in game but given that Caed Nua’s land grant is somehow both small and encompasses enough of the border/main trade routes that it’s also at least currently the roadwarden’s seat (I have……. Many questions about how that’s supposed to work given the rest of the lore But), so reasonably it’s in charge of that particular portion of roads, except that leaves us with either a. Caed Nua was not anywhere near as rundown as shown (which is better supported) or b. Somebody else is paying for that upkeep, and if it’s somebody else by process of elimination it’s the duc’s problem. Which yes would mean I have to redo all my math because I did all that before going wait hold on.

(The process of elimination is as follows: if it’s not a local expense, it’s not going to be the thayn’s problem either because that’s a really dumb way to break main road expenses down (and also if it were Raedric’s problem it wouldn’t be getting done based on the state of his portion of roads). If it’s not the thayn it probably also isn’t whatever’s above them in authority because at that point you’ve taken the honor away from the erl. It can’t be Bademar’s problem because, again, he wouldn’t be getting it done and also people would probably hate him less, which leaves it up to the Duc.)

Tbh my gut feeling is it’s subsidized by the Duc but it’s a local work, and there are probably fines for not doing your share, but on the third (fourth?) hand that would mean minimum splitting the tolls and I just can’t see that happening.

[fractallogic]

You know, I haven’t fully wrapped my head around how I’m going to incorporate it, but I had a great idea for this grant proposal that’s making me very excited

Because I think. finally. I will be able to justify testing arabic-speaking children. I will get to find out what kinds of errors THEY make learning my arabiclike made-up language.

And plus I’m realizing that I like portland more than eugene, and oops, the two Islamic schools and the one Arabic-medium school are all in the portland area oh no I will have to spend so much time in portland if I get this grant oh well

…plus I just really want to be able to stay in one place for three more years, and let scone live in Oregon like he’s really wanted to for YEARS.

I love arabic and I love my pastry and I love how kids do language. I am very excited about this part of the project and I just. The likelihood of it happening is vanishingly low. But it’s more likely to get this grant than getting a TT job. So.

[momocicerone]

In retrospect, quite objectively speaking and not to be arrogant or narcissistic but we can all agree that I was the best thing that’s ever happened to you, sis

[godblooded]

me dipping back into the mess that is asoiaf : but what if dany’s vision wasn’t rhae but was in fact aegon in a vision of something that never was and it was not rhae whispering lyanna’s name but instead a false past dany saw at the house of the undying and we do not know whose name was whispered since ‘a dying prince’ could easily be aegon as well as rhaerhae and we know that the visions are unreliable.

[taardisblue]

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[asmolbirb]

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[a-b-riddle]

Can’t stop thinking about poly141 who get so wrapped up in their own bullshit they begin to neglect reader. So you leave 🤷🏼‍♀️

It wasn’t a big deal at first. You understood that their jobs were intense to say the least. You own a bookshop, which in itself was exhausting, but you understood how they could get carried away with work.

You had excused the many delayed returned texts or missed FaceTime dates when they were deployed. When they came home, they almost always made it up to you. Showering you with attention and quality time.

But the past two returns home have been… different.

Usually at least one of them made a beeline to your shop or your loft if it was too late in the evening. You always held your breath when it was just one of them.

“They’re okay.” Was the usual answer. “Everyone made it back okay.” It was only then that you could melt into whoever’s hands you were in.

After one of their recent returns home you had voice to Price that you didn’t appreciate several days passing after they came back and no one had bothered to tell you. He had snapped. Arguing that a mission doesn’t finish just because they land back on soil. There was paperwork and debriefing to be done. If and when they wanted to see you they would.

He didn’t apologize until later. Crawling into your bed, using one of the keys you had given them. Blaming the stress. How they had almost lost Johnny for the reason of his outburst. What else could you do but forgive him?

So you had given them space after that one. Not holding it against them to decompress before seeing you.

The next time was the final straw. Solidifying how little they cared about you and how much power you had given them.

Johnny had come in around 7 one evening. He was dressed nicely, for civilian standards. You were reading a book on the couch when he had let himself in. You were wearing on of Simon’s sweatshirts and panties. He took you in for a moment before scooping you up.

He fucked you absolutely stupid. Adamant on having you cum on his tongue, his fingers and his cock. You were only able to bask in the afterglow of him filling you up before he started pulling his pants back on.

“What are you doing?” There were times that you would practically need a crow bar to get Johnny detached from you just long enough to relieve yourself. You had gotten many a UTI courtesy of Mr. John MacTavish.

“Dinner with my family tonight.” He explained by the time he was already buttoning his shirt. “The youngest just graduated and ma’ feels the need to go all out.” Now came the tie. Johnny was actually wearing a tie. To go to dinner. “A fancy dinner in London.” He huffed. “Meanwhile I’m out scufflin’ with bloody fuckin’ terrorists and I get a pat on the back.” He gave you a peck on the cheek before heading out the door. Promising to call you later.

You just sat in your bed. Still naked. Almost in shocked. He had fucked you and just… left. You were close to a panic attack as you called Simon.

Simon wasn’t the one to cuddle and coddle. But there was something so soothing at the sound of his voice or even how his heavy body felt perfect laying on top of you. Yes. Simon wasn’t the time to lift you up with words, but he was your own security blanket. Just having him close helped.

“Can you come over?” It wasn't unusal for Simon to be the one to come later in the evening. Insomnia was a bitch to deal with and you could sleep through the sounds of whatever he played on the tv. Most of the times you were content laying your head on his lap as he ran his hand along your head as if he were petting you. It was a bit cringe, but it knocked you out every time.

“What’s wrong?” He asked. The low timber of his voice already calming you.

“Johnny came over.” You sniffled. “He just fucked me and left.”

“Not surprised.” He scoffed. You could almost see him rolling those deep brown eyes of his. “If you wanted to cum, I’m happy to come over and help.”

For whatever reason, that only seemed to make you more upset. “You’re not listening.” You said, trying to spell it out for him. “He left. Like didn’t even stay and cuddle just left. Fucked me and left.”

“That’s why you’re calling me crying about?” He almost seemed… annoyed.

“Yes!” You said, nearly snapping. All of the tension from the last several months coming to the surface. “I’m not just a warm body to keep a bed cozy until you assholes decide you need to get one off.” Assholes. You called them assholes. “This isn’t what we agreed to.”

“Johnny is Johnny.” Simon tried to defend, not really caring to continue the conversation now knowing that you weren't in any sort of physical harm. “He wanted his dick wet and from the sound of it, that’s what he did. Don’t hold it against him because he had other things to do.”

“It’s not just Johnny leaving.” Your throat felt like it was tightening. A telltale sign you were close to crying. Whether from sadness or anger you weren't entirely sure. “The only time any of you want anything to do with me anymore is to fuck.” You missed date nights and lunches. You missed texting any and all of them about your day, about theirs. About new books. You had been trying for months to tell them over dinner one of your books got picked up. Yours was being traditionally published.

None of them had bothered to even try penciling you in.

“You got yours.” You heard the popping of a can top. Simon was settling in for the night. Once he popped a top at home there was no getting him out. He wasn't coming for you. “I don’t understand what you’re bitchin’ to me about. Yeah, in the beginning we indulged ya a bit? Dressed you up, took you out. But you should have known spreadin’ them legs of yours wouldn’t end with one of us puttin’ a ring on your finger.”

You didn’t know what to say. What could you say? These were the men that pursued you. Initially, individually, but when tensions became to much they offered a solution. All of them. Four times the attention, of the affection.

Four times the love.

But also four time the neglect. Four times the amount of heartbreak and disappointment. Loving all of them meant putting yourself in a position to let each of them hurt you in their own way and they had.

John's constant state of snapping at you as if you were one of his men.

Johnny swinging by as if you were just a fuck buddy. Not even bothering to give a peck before leaving.

Kyle essentially ignoring you for weeks now. Ghosting you for hours or having to cancel on date nights last minute or claiming that he really did forget that the two of you had planned to meet for lunch.

And now there was Simon. Telling you that all you meant to them was what was between your thighs.

Spreadin' them legs of yours wouldn't end with one of us puttin' a ring on your finger.

None of them ever intended on making this into something more. That much was clear now.

You didn't know what to say to Simon. You couldn't think of a witty retort. You couldn't find the proper insult to whirl his way. You couldn't convey just how much his words had hurt.

So you did the only thing you could.

You hung up.