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a-small-writer-in-a-big-world · 4 months

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Aren't We Just Terrified?

Pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x f!reader

Warnings: canon typical violence, hostage situation, blood, angst, death threats, Ghost going batshit

Words: 4.5k

Synopsis: Time is up...

You are currently reading chapter 13 of The Roommate Series

You weren’t getting out of this alive.

The moment that the man had ended the phone call with Ghost, he had broken the phone and threw it on the ground. He spoke quickly to the other men in Russian and you watched them walk out of the room without hesitation. He stood in front of you in the middle of the room, his attention turning back to you.

You swallowed hard, your cheek still stinging from his slap, as you waited for him to make his move. You tried to control your shaking, your eyes burning into his as he stared at you with eyes that made your stomach turn.

You had never known someone to embody evil until you had met him.

There was nothing in his eyes, a complete lack of any remorse for his actions towards you and presumably anyone else who had met the same fate as you in the past. They were dark, a void of blackness that unlike your Ghost’s eyes, was not at all comforting or warm.

They would haunt you if you ever got out.

He stepped closer to you and you pressed yourself against the wall, ignoring the pipes that dug into your back and the rope that bit into your skin. He kneeled in front of you, the gun hanging in front of him as he titled his head to get a better look at you.

You hated the way he stared at you. There was a strange hunger in his eyes, as if they thought of killing you sent a rush through him.

“A ‘college’ student, yes?” He wondered and you flinched. “How did you end up with ‘the Ghost’?”

You said nothing. There was nothing you could say that would help your case or Ghost’s and you were afraid that if you said anything wrong that he’d lose his temper. He showed you once already that his patience runs out quickly, so you weren’t willing to test how quickly it would take to make him angry.

“It doesn’t matter.” He tapped the barrel of the gun against your knee. “He won’t make the same mistake when he finds you, wherever I decide to put you.”

“But you said you’d give them eight hours and that I’d be let go if-”

“If they give it. You overestimate your value.”

He smiled and his eyes went black, an amalgamation of evil and viciousness as he raised the gun up to your face. He chuckled when you flinched and grabbed your jaw when you tried to look away and made you look at him while keeping the barrel in your line of sight.

A panicked breath shuddered out of your chest as you looked from the gun to him frantically.

“I never said I’d give you back alive.”

Your mouth went dry. You felt faint, from the blood loss or from the realization that you were about to die you didn’t know but if it weren’t for the fact that you were tied up to the pipes, you would’ve fallen over.

You couldn’t look at him as your body froze. There were no tears or shaking. You weren’t sure if it was acceptance or your mind preparing you for when the man would take your life.

Would he shoot you now? Would he shoot you at all? Maybe he was cruel enough to draw it out…

The man pushed your head away and stood up. You prepared yourself for him to raise the gun and shoot you, but he walked away from you towards the door.

“Preparations still need to be done.” He said and shut the door with a loud slam.

For a moment all you could do was sit there in silence. Your limbs were heavy with dread and you couldn’t move, your mind had gone completely blank. It was like you were somewhere else entirely, no longer inside your own body as you stared at the concrete floor with empty eyes.

You weren’t getting out.

You were going to die here.

There was so much that you still had left to do. So much that you wanted to do that you had waited years to do. It felt silly that you never went to college right after high school now that you were about to die. If you had, you would’ve had time to do what you really wanted to do in life and to go to the places you wanted to before you died.

But if you hadn’t gone to college when you did, you never would’ve met Simon…Ghost.

You would have never known him, the man you deemed to be the love of your life, and you never would’ve been able to become friends with him. All the time you wasted on the what ifs before you got together felt stupid now that you knew he loved you just as much. You should’ve spent more time with him, should’ve told him you love him more, should’ve told him you loved him from the beginning instead of waiting.

There was so much the two of you were going to do together. There were so many memories you were waiting to make with him.

The light flickered and caught your attention, bringing you partly out of your shock. You looked around the empty room, at the concrete walls that would be the last thing you ever saw before you looked to the rusted pipe that you were tied to.

You grabbed the metal and looked up at the ceiling where it connected to a series of other pipes. You gripped it tightly and gave it a harsh tug, watching all the pipes shudder from the force.

You tugged again. And again. And again.

You kept pulling against your restraints and the pipe with as much strength as you had. You listened to the creaks and groans from the pipes behind your thumping heartbeat and swallowed the lump in your throat. Your body ached, your head hurt and you felt sick but you continued to try to break the pipe.

If you died, you weren’t going to let it happen without a fight. You were going to fight until your body gave out, until you were too exhausted, until he killed you quick and easy.

You’re not sure how long you sat there trying to break out of it, an hour maybe even almost two, but every second counted. Sweat rolled down from your temple and you began to feel faint again, but you refused to give up.

Outside of the building you heard rumbling, a sound that you immediately recognized as an aircraft of some sort but you didn’t pay too much attention to it. There was no time to waste.

“Come on, come on.” You huffed out under your breath as you placed your feet against the wall and pulled back as hard as you could. “Please, please.”

The pipe dislodged and rattled against the wall. You fell onto your back and you took a moment to catch your breath as every part of your body felt heavy against the concrete floor.

The ropes were still around your wrists and burned against your skin. When you rolled over on your side you looked down to see some of the threads turning red from your own blood and you grimaced at the pain that coursed through you.

The men would come back soon and you had to get rid of the ropes.

You bit into them immediately. You tugged on them as hard as you could while you wiggled your wrists, ignoring the pain and the few tears that rolled down your cheeks. Before long, they were loose enough that you quickly threw them off and felt blood trickle down your wrists.

You stood up on shaky legs and rushed towards the door. A curse left your mouth when you tried to open it but it didn’t budge. There was no way out of the room except through the door and it was entirely made of metal.

You’d have to wait for them to come back.

You went back to the pipes and grabbed onto the one that you broke. You pulled hard and tried to break it off the wall in hopes that you’d have something to defend yourself with.

The pipe fell and you struggled to hold onto it from how heavy it was. The end smacked against the floor, causing the pain in your head to get worse and you hissed.

It was too heavy for your beat up muscles and weak state, but you couldn’t let go. You needed it, it was probably the only thing that was going to keep you alive when the men came back.

You heard footsteps outside of the door and you quickly moved behind it. Your heart beat so fast your chest hurt, and you tried to keep control over yourself and your emotions.

You don’t think you’ve been this terrified in your life. One wrong move and you’d be gone.

The door unlocked and opened with a loud squeak. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath to ready yourself for a fight.

One of the men, the one who followed you at campus, walked in. He stopped when he didn’t see you against the wall and let out a loud curse in Russian.

You ran from behind the door and swung the pipe at him as hard as you could. He screamed when it connected with him and you shoved him out of the way. You didn’t wait to see if he would stand up or not, you bolted out of the door and into the hallway.

You sprinted down the hallway, unsure of which way to go, while the man yelled behind you. The walls of the building all looked the same. Every turn you took confused, yells echoed throughout the halls and you felt faint.

You eventually found the stairwell but just as you did, gunfire began to ring out. You jumped, panic flying through you,

Were they shooting at you? Was Ghost here coming to get you?

It didn’t matter, you weren’t going to wait to find out.

You raced down the stairwell, the gunfire in the distance sending your nerves over the edge. You raced down the stairs to get to the first floor. You had to get out, you didn’t want to be part of the firefight that was taking place within the walls of some abandoned building that no one even thought about anymore.

You opened the door out of the stairwell but just as you came out into the hallway, your captor turned around to see you. In the split second he saw you, he raised the gun and the bullets narrowly missed you.

You sprinted back up the stairs and heard him race after you. You slammed through the door that led to the third floor and entered a random room, two bullets hitting the door just as you entered.

It was an old supply room filled with crates and shelves that had dust all over them. There were old windows on the other side of the room that you ran to but there was no time to break them to jump as you heard his footsteps approach.

You hid behind one of the crates and tried to quiet your breathing. The door slammed shut and you clenched your jaw, thinking for just a moment that you could jump out one of the windows but you were already three stories up.

If you could sneak around him and get to the door, you could run back out and be free.

“You could’ve made this easy for yourself.” He said from the door before he began to walk through the room. “I would’ve made it quick.”

You listened to his footsteps and crawled around the crate away from his view. You tried your hardest to stay as quiet as you could while he made his way through the room searching for you. You jumped when he pushed over a shelf that clattered loudly but hid yourself behind another crate.

The door was still halfway across the room and it was possible he’d shoot you if you attempted to run right for it.

You eyes caught onto a rusty wrench a couple feet from you and you grabbed it just as he shoved another shelf down. Clutching it made your heart race more but you couldn’t allow yourself to hesitate; if this was how you’d survive you had to do whatever it took.

“You think that you’re safer with Ghost? You have no idea who he really is, what he’s willing to give up for his own needs.” He taunted and you scrambled closer towards the door.

You wanted to argue that he wouldn��t. Ghost had done nothing but make you feel safe, he would do anything to protect you, and you knew he was coming to get you. You’d never believe the words that came out of a man who kidnapped civilians.

He knocked over a couple more crates and a shelf, his rising frustration becoming more palpable. He seemed to get more frantic and you listened to him walk back towards the door.

There was no way around it.

When he got closer you jumped out from behind the crate and swung the wrench at him. You managed to hit his arm with it and the gun was sent flying across the floor as he yelled out in pain. You went to swing again but he grabbed your wrist and twisted it, causing excruciating pain to flash through you.

You cried out and dropped the wrench, trying your hardest to break away from him before he punched you in the face. You nearly fell to the ground but instead you grabbed him and dug your fingernails into his skin while you hit him as hard as you could.

Pure adrenaline raced through you and bit into his skin so hard you tasted blood. He screamed and you kneed him in the crotch as hard as you could before pushing him away.

You scrambled for the gun, falling onto the floor as you clutched it with an iron grip and turned towards the man. You aimed it the best you could, remembering briefly what Ghost had told you to do while the man quickly regained his composure.

The door opened and you pulled the trigger.

The helo had carried them to your location in record time, not even two hours had passed before they were flying above the empty factory you were held hostage in.

They were so incredibly lucky that whoever had kidnapped you didn’t destroy your actual phone or toss it at a different location. With little time Laswell had gotten your location and it wasn’t even that far from the location the man had given them.

From there they would split up. If they were being truthful then Price and Gaz would keep you safe until he got to you, if not then he’d find you in the factory and get you out by all means necessary.

The entire flight Ghost was on edge. On the outside he seemed as composed as he usually was, maybe just a tad more tense than he normally was but on the inside he was fighting to keep his sanity.

If he couldn’t reach you in time he might not recover. He might become someone who he had buried a long time ago, someone who had become so hellbent on revenge that he barely had enough to rebuild himself back again.

He’d make him regret it until the very moment he was buried six feet under.

“This is a rescue mission first.” Price’s voice cut through the comms and he turned his attention to his captain. “We get her out-”

“John, we need information.” Laswell interrupted and Ghost clenched his jaw. “We rescue the hostage but we keep the target alive. We don’t know how much he knows.”

“If the target needs neutralized then we’ll do what we need to.” Ghost said and watched his teammates glanced between each other.

They knew what he was thinking. They didn’t feel the same way as he did about the situation but they knew he wouldn’t stop at anything to get you to safety. He’d deal with the consequences later and he didn’t care what it cost him.

Nothing else mattered but you and he’d forsake the entire world if it meant your safety was guaranteed.

Laswell was quiet for a moment and he stared at Price who had a serious look on his face. Out of everyone, his captain would understand, it wasn’t like he had never bent the rules in order to achieve what he wanted or to save he wanted to.

“You have full execute authority.” Laswell said and that was all he needed. “But we need him alive, Ghost, do the right thing.”

The right thing would be killing him. The right thing would have never been putting you in this situation in the first place. The right thing would be fixing this entire mess before he lost you for good.

Price gave him a knowing look. He knew his lieutenant but said nothing as he addressed them all as the helo began to descend near the factory.

“Soap, Ghost, clear out any hostiles in the factory as you need. Local police will join you on the ground. Radio in once you find her and the target.”

“We’ll work on getting our own intel.” Gaz cut in and locked eyes with Ghost. Kill that bastard, he could hear him saying, take the gloves off and kill him. “Focus on getting her back.”

Ghost didn’t think twice to nod. He’d use his best judgment, try his hardest to compose himself because while you were in danger this was his job and he knew how easy it was to get a hostage killed. He had to be Ghost, which meant he couldn’t let his emotions take control of him even when he desperately wanted to destroy the entire building to get to you.

“Rog.” He said and the helo touched down.

Ghost and Soap jumped out not far from the factory. The moment his boots touched the ground he pushed his emotions away and focused himself on the building. He immediately set out towards it, clutching his gun as tightly as he could while Soap followed closely behind him.

The air was thick, humid and silent. He could see the police waiting outside the factory and he could only think about how much worse they were going to make this.

“Let me deal with them.” Soap told him and he couldn’t feel more grateful towards his friend. “You go ahead.”

“Thanks.” He mumbled and gave him a quick pat before he raced towards the factory.

He went around the back, searching for an entrance and found a door. Someone stood in front of it with a cigarette in their mouth and he pulled out one of his knives. He didn’t even blink when the knife sliced through the man's throat as he threw it and entered the factory.

“Moving interior.” He called into his comms.

“Right behind ya Lt.” Soap replied.

Ghost kept his gun at the ready as he entered the musty building. His eyes were trained down the halls as years of field experience drove him down one of the halls.

He didn’t have time to check every floor. Every moment wasted was a moment where you could possibly die. He had to think where they’d put you to keep an eye on you and limit your chances of escape.

Any floor above the first. There were four floors from the info that Laswell had found, it’d deter you from jumping out a window and make it harder for you to escape through the stairwells.

He found a stairwell and quickly made his way up without making much noise, all the while he kept his eyes and ears open for any hostiles. He went up to the third floor and began to sweep the hallways.

They didn’t know how many of them were inside. If they had any indication he and the others were inside, they might execute you before he can get to you first. There were two men coming down the hallway almost frantic as they talked too fast in Russian for him to understand.

He hid behind the corner and pulled out another knife. He waited for the men to get closer to keep the upper hand-

Gunshots from below sounded out and he cursed under his breath. Soap radioed in the situation and he heard the men start running towards him.

In an instant he jumped out from behind the corner and threw the knife, striking one of the men in the chest, before he shot the other in the head. It was quick and painless, more than they deserved for touching you, but now time was running out.

He began to check the rooms, getting further and further away from the stairwell. All of the rooms were empty and by the time he got to the other side of the building he was starting to lose some of his composure.

What if he had been too late? What if you were already gone?

There was a commotion at the other side of the building on the same floor as him. He heard two gunshots and then a door slammed before there was silence.

Ghost immediately turned back. He rushed down the halls, listening for whoever had run up here, hoping that maybe it was you, though if that was you being shot at it made his stomach drop. He checked the rooms he missed but every empty room filled his fear which only made him angrier.

You had to be here. He couldn’t have failed you, he couldn’t have failed someone he loves again…

He heard crashes in the distance that got louder as he got closer to the stairwell again. There were only a few rooms on this side and the closer he got, the louder the crashes got.

There was yell and then you screamed.

You.

Your scream sent a chill through his body and for a split second he thought about that nightmare. Your lifeless body, your life cut short because of him, him losing you.

Ghost sprinted towards the room he knew had you in and just as he kicked the door open he saw you shoot a bullet into your captors shoulder. Instinct carried him and all rational thought left him as he rushed up to the man and slammed his gun into his face.

He kneeled on top of him and raised his fist, striking him hard. He punched him again and again, letting the blood from the man’s broken nose and busted face drench his glove as he pinned him down against the cold concrete floor. He kept an iron grip against his and the man tried to fight back.

Ghost wanted to beat him to death, wanted to make him hurt a thousand times worse and make him pay for it. He nearly would’ve, ready to kill him right there in cold blood like a fucking murderer before he heard you behind him.

It was like he was pulled out of a trance.

He was breathing heavily as his fist shook, pain radiating from his knuckles as the blood made the fabric stick to his dry skin. The ringing in his ears brought him back to the present and he stared down at the mangled face of your captor who barely hung on to life.

He couldn’t kill someone in front of you. He couldn’t make this even worse than it was, he couldn’t hurt you any more than he already had.

Ghost shoved away from him and when looked back at you his heart broke.

You were covered in bruises and grime, but mostly blood. Your blood, judging by the matt of it in your hair on your temple, which had soaked your shirt. There was blood on your wrists and dried blood on your arms; you clutched your wrist and as you sat on the ground staring at him with fear.

There was no familiarity in your eyes as they bounced around his face, his mask.

Ghost said your name and he watched instant relief wash over you.

“Ghost…!” You cried and threw yourself on him.

He wrapped his arms protectively around you and kneeled on the ground.

A heavy weight had lifted off his chest as you clutched him as if your life depended on it. He let out a shuddering breath as he placed a hand on your head and listened to your sobs that echoed throughout the room. Feeling your weight against him, knowing that you were still there had him shedding a few tears of his own.

You were alive. Fuck, you were alive.

“I’m here.” He whispered to you as you shook. “I’m here, no one’s going to hurt you.”

Your full body sobs were heavy. Your tears soaked his jacket but he couldn’t care less as he tried to soothe you, tried to calm you down enough so you could at least breathe between the hiccups and your cries.

“Breathe, sweetheart.” He quietly begged as he worried more about you. “Need to see your head.”

But you were inconsolable, unable to control the torrent of emotions as the last couple of hours hit you. You dug your nails into his tac vest as if you feared he would let go of you and you hid your face in his shoulder, refusing to let him pull away to look at your wounds.

You didn’t care about your injuries, you just wanted to be held by him.

Ghost cared deeply. He didn’t know how long you had been kept here, how deep they went and how they might become infected. He knew they hurt and he didn’t want you to feel anymore pain, he didn’t want you to have to suffer any more.

His heart broke at the way you held onto him. At the state of you, at the fact that while you were still alive he had still failed you.

You had come into contact with his work, with the other part of his life he never wanted you to come into contact with and it had nearly torn you apart. He had put you in harm's way and now you were forever scarred.

“Ghost, how copy?” Price’s voice cut through his ear piece and he realized the gunfire had stopped.

“I have her.” He reported back and wrapped his arm tighter around your waist. “Target is incapacitated.”

“Rog. Helo’s on the way.”

“Prep medical.”

Ghost maneuvered you enough to where he was able to hook his arm underneath your knees and picked you up. He gave you a reassuring squeeze when you tightened your hold on him and walked out of the room.

There were so many emotions within him. He was angry at himself, guilt and shame festing inside him for letting this happen, relieved that you were still alive but so anxious about your state that he almost felt sick.

You didn’t deserve this.

Link to part 14

A/n: whoops wrote another fic of Ghost going batshit insane for you haha (it will happen again) Next chapter will be much, much longer I'm sure. also title may change idk

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#the roommate series #simon ghost riley x reader #simon ghost riley x you #simon riley x you #simon riley x reader #ghost x reader #ghost x you #simon ghost riley #call of duty #mw2 ghost #ghost mw2

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jazzsonly · 1 month

Text

౨ৎ blurb. ౨ৎ

ᴇᴠᴇʀʟᴏɴɢ

pairing(s): chad meeks-martin, mindy meeks-martin x fem!sibling!reader (x tara carpenter.)

warning(s): angst(?) mentions of reader being in fight, mentions of reader having a black eye, arguing, obviously blk!reader, shitty writing, typos—not proofread, mentions of being stabbed—mentions of ghostface attacks, established romantic relationship between reader and tara, mentions of a panic attack, though not specified, reader is 19.

summary: chad and mindy’s, troubled little sister.

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“sit down.” mindy uttered through her gritted teeth as her hand firmly grasps your right shoulder, her nails digging into your skin through the fabric of your faded evil dead shirt as she harshly pushes you down into the couch that was placed in the living room of your girlfriend’s shared apartment.

“look at your face! a black eye?!” you squint at your older sister, giving her scornful eyes that she definitely didn’t miss.

“what?” she pauses. “you have something to say to me? say it.”

“i’m not a child, mindy—”

“then act like it!” her hands throw up exclaiming frustration before falling back down to her side in a, rightful, dramatic manner.

“you won’t even hear me out! why is it always my fault?”

this time her eyes squint at you, not in angry or frustration but in astonishment. “because it just is, y/n. every week it’s the same thing with you and i won’t deal with it anymore.”

she won’t deal with it anymore? what does that mean? was she sending you back to woodsboro?

letting your teeth sink into your bottom lip, hard enough to draw blood from the cut you had got from a previous fight earlier this week; you watched as the girl paced back and forth, her hands firmly on her hips and her breathing uneven. she was clearly stressed—or maybe even something more than stressed.

but chad wouldn’t let her do that, would he? he wouldn’t send you away?

“not only did we agree but we helped you convince mom and dad to let you come to new york with us, we convinced them that we’d look after you and make sure you finished high school.”

“all while we promised we’d go to college, but every week either me or chad has to leave class early because you got into trouble—and you don’t even care!”

“not once have yo—”

the apartment’s door’s locks clicked and it creaked open, revealing chad with sam and tara who appeared by his side.

“hey, i got here as—”

“what happened to your face?” chad was cut off by tara, who rushed over to you, crouching down in front of you and cupping your bruised face.

“‘s nothing tar.” you pull away from the girl’s touch is a resentful manner, still very high in emotion from mindy’s scolding.

“it’s nothing? dude, half of your face is bruised.” chad spoke up as he stepped by mindy’s side, arms crossed.

sam wallowed in the back, not sure if she had the right to say much in this situation. (which, according to mindy and chad she had the right to scold you whenever, maybe even more than them at times.)

“i had to defend myself, so what?” you shrug, a plastic nonchalant aura rolling off you with a very loud hint of anger.

“every week?” tara asks in dismay, hating to see this site get worse and worse.

you shrug again.

“i can’t with you right now.” tara threw her hands up, moving away from you, not wasting any time to make her way to the hallway that led to her room.

“then don’t! i don’t wanna deal with any of you right now! you don’t listen to me, you act like you’ve never had to defend yourself—you act like i haven’t gone through what you’ve gone through!”

you stand up in haste from the spot mindy had forced you into.

“fighting a literal serial killer and fighting some scrawny girl at school are two different things, y/n!” mindy broke down her words in a belittling manner.

sam now too had disappeared to her room, giving you three privacy though you could be heard through the walls. (thank god quinn wasn’t here, she would’ve got a kick from eavesdropping.)

“why can’t you channel this energy into something important? like soccer—oh, wait you got kicked off the team for what? fighting!”

chad eyes mindy, deciding to step into the conversation, knowing the nerve that could’ve hit for you as you had drunkenly expressed just how much it hurt you to get booted from the team you had worked so hard to be on, even planned to play in college when you had the chance.

“look, what mindy is trying to say is: we care about you, y/n—you’re our sister but you can’t keep doing this…you aren’t just hurting yourself but us too.”

“and tara,” chad points towards the girl’s whereabouts.

“even sam.”

“how does it hurt you all, if i fight someone?”

i had to skip class two days in a row for you. chad though but failed to vocalize, viewing it as pointless.

“…mindy and i have been talking, and thinking a lot.”

you heart beat began to pick up, a swirl of a holeless pit formed in your stomach at the long pause in chad’s words.

“we think you should go back to woodsboro.”

your illogical anger has flushed away in mere seconds after the words hit your ears, immediately you became their little sister again.

“no, i—look, i won’t fight anymore—i’ll—i’ll go to the stupid therapy with you guys!”

you watched as chad eyed mindy, him believing in your words while she held a faithless look, knowing, even if you were her little sister there was little to no truth to your words.

hell, even you knew there was little to no truth to your words. but you were just a kid, even if you were just a year younger than them—it scared you, it scared every single second that ghostface could be back.

you could be stabbed again, in the hospital room right beside your girlfriend, in physical pain on your own and in mental pain, not knowing if the people you love most in this world were even going to make it.

you weren’t even sure if you were going to make it.

these things, these emotions and thoughts formed a livid storm in you like no other.

you’re just a teenager, and like any other teenager you assume you’re strong—you don’t need any type of therapy, where you talk about your feelings and any of dumb shit, shit just to bring the memories back.

you beat it physically on your own, so you can beat it mentally on your own.

but you couldn’t be more wrong, your troubled day to day be proof of this.

this very moment, the fear that rang through your body being proof of it too.

“please. i can’t—” your knees bulk causing you to drop back down to the couch, a slight dizzy feeling taking over your head, an enclosure taking over your chest.

a panic attack forming that you were all too familiar with, battling them alone in your room—too prideful to talk to anyone, well, minus tara who had helped you through a few.

“y/n? what’s wrong? breathe.” your siblings instantly by your side.

they don’t miss the look in your eyes, almost as if they were foreign too and you couldn’t understand what was going on.

“i think she’s having a panic attack.” chad notes, his hand resting on your shoulder.

“uh, what do we do? what—”

you flutter your eyes, managing to utter out a name.

“tar—tara.”

“tara—tara? get tara!” mindy orders chad, who is quick on his feet.

“just breathe, y/n. it’s okay. i’m here. chad’s here, and tara’s here. it’s all alright.” mindy’s harsh tone had broken down to a soft one, the same one she would use when you were kids and chad would make you cry by breaking one of your toys, and the same one she used when you were in the hospital bed after being attacked by ghostface.

“baby? what’s wrong?” tara crouches down in front of you, like when she first came in the door, this time in a haste to comfort you instead of worrisome about your bruises.

“i—i’m sorry.” you grasp her wrist as her hands settle on either side of your face.

“it’s okay. you don’t need to be sorry, i’m not mad at you. neither are chad and mindy.”

the carpenter eyes them, getting them to shake their head in support.

“we’re all just a little stressed out, okay? that doesn’t mean we’re mad at you.”

“i love you, breathe for me.” you shake your head, following the breathing guidelines she were displaying for you.

“she’s calming down.” tara assures the twins.

“come on,” tara stands, holding out here hand for you to take.

“let’s get you cleaned up and then we can lay down, yeah?”

“but—”

“you can talk with chad and mindy later, come on, i know you want some cuddles.” tara teases in a joking manner, attempting to lighten the mood.

mindy taking note of the comment, being sure to tease you about ‘wanting cuddles’ later.

━━━ 👩🏽‍💻 i would love to write an actual story based off this but i have no real ideas, if you guys have any send em my way 👀

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maliland · 2 months

Text

RESENTMENT: PT. 2

"how could you lie?" part one angel(s): e-42 miles morales & black fem reader includes: angst, infidelity, homewrecking, depressing themes, & heartbreak (men being disappointments per usual) synopsis: you used to describe your experience with love as one of complexity and simplicity all at once, but after you learn what your boyfriend did at a party with another girl while you were at home and sick, your heart is left with irreparable damage and an abundance of resentment. wc: 6.7k divider by @/cafekitsune a/n: this is gonna be my last sv fic for a hot min (or forever) 😭 savor and enjoy. ik the tag has been dead and you all have been malnourished, so yw! <3 icl, idk how i feel about it but y'all can lmk 🫶 (p.s: before ppl start nothing non-pg ever happened in this fic at any point in time. just kissing. ion get down like that 👍 thanks.)

when you arise in the morning and before you lay your head to rest at night, one thing is always definite: you are human.

humans are imperfect, so they make mistakes. genuine ones. honest ones. you’ve mixed up salt and sugar while baking chocolate chip cookies. you’ve hit your best friend square in the face while trying to spike a volleyball. you’ve missed assignment deadlines, forgotten about chores, and left the grocery list at home, all honest mistakes. a boy pressing his lips to another girl’s, though he has another he calls his own, is not a mistake. if it were up to you, it’d be a crime punishable by execution. between miles and yourself, no mercy was shown for the loyal one of you two, so why should he be granted any? infidelity; the act itself is the murder of the most important, sacred muscle, so why not return the favor?

you know your intentions before you give into the temptation of them. you knew miles knew. he knew from the moment that girl pulled him over to a vacant bedroom. did he think they’d simply exchange pleasantries? even so, why partake in such with someone who clearly has a taste for you? a taste for insulting the one you love most just as easily as she breathed?

these are all questions that would never be answered truthfully. you’d have to make peace with the reality or the only peace you’d know was the eternal kind that followed after death. and to think that you once believed in those stupid children’s fairy tales. miles made you believe that that kind of love could be real life. he almost made you believe you could attain the happy ending you always dreamed about. you were so close to it too. to have your bubble burst like that by the person you love most..? cold. way colder than the shivers repeatedly sinking down your spine.

it was a stupid idea to leave your window open.

the medicine you had taken for your cold had you knocked out in the warmth of your bed and you slept soundly. the chilly air would blow through the curtains now and then. the wind was only a light breeze at first. it felt nice, maybe even comforting, but when night finally fell, the current picked up. you were woken up by an icy blast hitting your face.

you groaned and slowly rose up, pulling the covers off of you before you swung your legs off of the bed. you drowsily staggered to your window and forced it shut, drawing the curtains closed only seconds afterward. you would just have to hope the mishap wouldn’t make you any sicker than you already were. you mindlessly carried yourself back to your bed and submerged yourself under the covers. you grabbed your phone, which was lying face down beside you.

you unlocked your phone and went straight to instagram, tapping through everyone's stories. most of the people you knew were at the party. parties weren't your cup of tea, so you couldn't really say you wished you had gone. you were more of a homebody than you'd like to admit.

you eventually got to miles' story. all he had posted was a single picture of him and his group of friends, and they all seemed to be enjoying themselves. seeing your boyfriend happy made you happy. you smiled to yourself before switching to your messages app. you had notifications from both miles and your friends who were also at the halloween party. you opened miles’ messages first.

9:37pm

miles: hey ma (9:37 pm) miles: i know you’re probably sleeping right now, but i wanted to lyk that i got here okay (9:37 pm) miles: i’m with my friends (9:38 pm) miles: ima go now but i love you 💗 i’ll text you soon (9:39 pm)

10:23 pm

miles: yooo just checking in 🙌 miss you a lot (9:36 pm) miles: hope you’re enjoying that nap ❤️❤️(9:37 pm)

you: hey i’m up now 😈😈 (10:52 pm) you: i saw your ig story 🙃 looks like you guys are having fun so i’ll leave you to it (10:52 pm) you: text me later, i love you so much more 💓 (10:53 pm)

you swiped out of your text thread with miles and opened your group chat with your three best friends, sasha, lani, and nae. while you met sasha and lani not too long ago, you’ve known nae for damn near your entire life.

dollz 💘 9:13pm

sasha: how’s my bedridden baby? 🫶🫶 (9:13 pm)

lani: she’s been unconscious for mad long 👎(9:14 pm)

nae: we should ditch this party n go to her place instead i’m BOREDDD (9:16 pm) nae: and what if bro’s dead (9:16 pm)

jana: girl (9:20 pm) jana: she ain’t dead 🤦‍♀️ please. (9:21 pm)

sasha: ofc not (9:23 pm) sasha: nae's right.. this party lowk boring asf🧍‍♀️ can we leave soon? (9:25 pm)

jana: yes 💋 (9:25 pm)

nae: thought you’d never ask. (9:26 pm)

10:57pm

you: y’all i’m up damn! 😭 (10:57 pm) you: is it really that boring? miles seems to be having fun (10:57 pm)

nae: he buggin then cuz it's been like two hours and this party is STILL boring as shit (11:01 pm) nae: i tried to give it the benefit of the doubt but nvm. (11:01 pm) nae: my niece's fourth birthday party was x100 more turnt than this (11:02 pm) nae: i’m stuffing all the good snacks in my purse nd then we outta this bitch 🏃‍♀️ i’ll be in the car y’all (11:02 pm)

jana: bruh🧍‍♀️ (11:03 pm)

sasha: nae beloved, you already put hella snacks in the passenger seat (11:03 pm) nae: so? 🥱 (11:04 pm) sasha: you don’t need no more tf 😭😭 big backed hungry ass (11:04 pm)

you: yes she does (11:10 pm) you: she’s thinking of me, duh (11:11 pm)

sasha: damn you right.. maybe 🤷‍♀️ (11:15 pm) sasha: or maybe she'll eat up all the snacks and i'll laugh in your face and say i told you so 🤌 (11:16 pm)

jana: uh huh... anw girl can we come over? (11:18 pm)

you: i’d say yes but miles is coming over soon (11:21 pm) you: y’all can come over first thing tmrw morning tho 💋💋(11:21 pm)

right as you sent that message, your phone began to ring and you were met with your own puzzled reflection on the screen of your phone. it was a facetime call from nae. you couldn’t come up with a reason why she’d ever need to facetime you from a party when she could text or call. nevertheless, you picked up. you forced yourself up and out of you warmth of your bed, throwing your comforter and many, many blankets off of you.

you answered the facetime call as you turned the knob to your bedroom door to leave, making your way downstairs to the kitchen so you could raid the pantry for food. when nae’s face popped up on your screen, you noticed that the interior of sasha’s car surrounded her, but neither sasha or lani were anywhere to be found.

“hey danae, what’s up?” you said into the phone as you shut the microwave. you'd settled on instant ramen since you were feeling lazy. when you caught a glimpse of your best friend's face on your phone screen a second time, you clocked that she looked worried and that made you worried too. it didn't help that she was dead silent. you raised an eyebrow. “you alone? where’s lani and sasha?"

“something happened,” nae spoke slowly, disregarding your question. her eyes were bolting back and forth between her phone camera and sasha’s car window.

“what?” you shook your head, your eyebrows furrowing in concern. you set your phone down on the counter, propping your elbows onto the surface while you tried to decipher nae's expression, but that got you nowhere.

“i’m gonna send you something. just hold on a sec.”

“nae, what’s going on?” you inquired, a puzzled expression painting your face.

she didn’t reply. you pressed your lips into a thin line and closed your eyes in both confusion and frustration, strings of air passing through your nostrils. whatever nae was about to tell you was obviously nothing good. you didn't anticipate anything but the absolute worst. you opened your eyes again when your phone dinged. it was photo attachment from nae. you furrowed your brows blinked a few times before tapping it, pulling up you and your best friend's text thread. your entire body went limp when your brain registered the monstrosity on your screen. all you could do in the moment was stare in shock. it was a clear shot of miles and arielle at the party making out in some random bedroom upstairs. arielle who wouldn’t quit making moves on miles. miles who would shut down her pathetic attempts every time. arielle who’s always hated your guts without reason. miles who swore on everything that you were the only one he loved.

it was all so ironic, truly. arielle was dressed as an angel, a sparkly halo hovering above her head as if she wasn’t concomitantly sinning—shamelessly home-wrecking. and you could see it now: the embodiment of your relationship, or the so-called home you and your boyfriend shared. in your mind, it was ablaze and you were curled up all alone inside of it. you were left to succumb to the searing flames, burning to nothing ash while all that you and miles share burned beside you.

the boy would come home to the walls still burning and in the process of self-purging. he wouldn’t find you, rather the remnants of what used to be you. the ash would slip through his dirty, unfaithful fingers as they trembled in horror. he wouldn’t be able to live with himself. he’d desperately try to grasp you. he’d try to save you and scoop debris into his sweaty palms so he could salvage what was left of you. still, there was nothing. there wasn't a single thing in the universe that could aid the way you felt in that moment.

now, miles would have to mourn you, for he killed you. and he didn’t even know it yet.

your eyes were squeezed shut because they had to be deceiving you. you must not be fully awake yet. the medicine must be making you hallucinate. you were dreaming. you were a hundred percent dreaming. that wasn’t miles.

how could that be miles?

“i was looking for lani and found… them instead,” nae muttered. “i don’t know if he saw me take the picture, or what. i left to tell you right after.”

you swallowed hard. though a million different thoughts were racing through your mind, none of them came to be verbal. you couldn’t bring yourself to say anything, because what do you even say when something like this happens? would anything you said be enough? would any quantity of words in any given order be able you place the way you felt? unlikely. highly.

your eyes continue you gape at the photo, even though the sight was making your stomach churn. you couldn’t look away. your eyes were fixed on miles' hands on arielle's hips, then her hands cupping his cheeks. nae was still on facetime explaining whatever it was she was explaining, but you weren’t listening. her words were static to your ears. there was a pit in your stomach and it was growing deeper and deeper, your wounded heart subsiding along with it. you set your phone face down on the kitchen counter and began to clutch your stomach. you swore you were going to convulse and vomit from how ill you felt.

“[name]!” nae snapped her fingers into the mic. “yo, you still with me? i’m coming over. i’m gonna call an uber right now.”

you blinked and shook your head, flipping your phone back over and taking a deep breath. you couldn’t just shut down, not now. you had something you needed to confront. someone.

“no,” you sniffled.

you didn’t even notice the hot tears rolling down your cheeks. you quickly swiped them away with the sleeve of miles’ hoodie. the realization that it was his hoodie you had on made you freeze up again for a few seconds, and then you buried your face in the palms of your hands.

“what do you mean ‘no?’” nae frowned, bringing the speaker up to her ear in case she heard you incorrectly.

your phone dinged three times. in your notification center were text messages from the devil himself.

miles: hey ma, i’m leaving now (11:25 pm) miles: the party was okay at first but it got boring (11:25 pm) miles: i’ll be there in like fifteen ❤️ (11:26 pm)

you just stared at the messages, biting your bottom lip until it began to draw blood as a plea for you to stop. the taste was metallic in your mouth, but your teeth didn’t budge. you didn't want miles over anymore, but it was far too late to tell him to turn around. it's not like he'd check his phone while he was driving, anyway.

“i keep losing you, girl."

you had forgotten all about nae for a second, her voice grounding you back to earth. you exhaled, your breath coming out unsteady. “miles is on his way over. after i talk to him, i’ll call you and you can come over then.”

“okay, babe,” nae nodded with a gentle sigh.

“do… lani and sasha know?” “no, they don’t,” nae denied. “i wouldn’t tell them before you.”

you pressed your lips together and silence engulfed your kitchen. you let your mind wander some more. after all this was over and done with, you'd have to explain to all of your loved ones that miles cheated on you. the very thought of having to tell everyone—your family, your friends, your dad—it embarrassed you. you couldn't stomach the very thought, so you exhaled deeply, opting to take it one step at a time. nae spoke again. “listen, if you don’t call or text me in, like, an hour, ima come over there.”

“okay," you nodded.

“remember that you deserve nothing but the best of the best. i love you so much, okay?”

“i know,” you tried to convene a smile. “i love you more.”

you hung up the phone and rid of any stray tears on your face. after nae's face vanished from your screen, you were left staring at you and your boyfriend's message thread. without putting much thought into it, you began to type.

‘cool, i’m jus—'

your fingers froze. you couldn’t text miles. he didn’t deserve anything so little as acknowledgment. you repeatedly hit backspace until the bar was blank and shut off your cell.

you sat idly on one of the kitchen stools behind the counter, your instant ramen long forgotten about. in the moment, you were feeling indifferent as a result of shock. still, you knew yourself better. when miles finally confessed his sins, you’d want to scream. you’d bombard him with a million questions at once, only to angrily invalidate any explanation that passed through his adulterous lips. you’d want to burn every handwritten love letter, every piece of clothing, and every gift, because they all meant nothing now.

he was a liar, and he knew it. if you could kill a man and face no consequences, miles might’ve been gone before he even walked through your door.

while you waited for him, you sat there and tortured yourself in thought. you couldn’t help it. was this planned? was this the first time? had he always thought of her like this? did he wish you were her when he was with you?

when you’d exhausted all of those questions, you began to think back to your own actions and behavior as you scrolled up on your texts with him.

maybe i said something that upset him? but i think he would've told me... right..? or have i been distant? no, that’s not possible. we talk every day. is he bored of me? is that it? am i boring? none of these texts are showing signs of boredom, so what is it?

you'd soon resorted to flipping through the pages in your diary. you were really good about documenting your day-to-day life. if something happened with miles in the past that your brain wouldn’t let you dig up in the moment, surely you would’ve written it there. the pad of your index finger slid across the rough pages as your anguished eyes skimmed the entries. ten minutes in, you still couldn’t find a thing. you'd give anything for a straightforward answer, but you knew it wasn't going to come from miles himself.

when you heard a key grinding into the keyhole of the front door, you slammed your diary shut and jumped off of the stool, knocking it over in the process. you sprinted upstairs to your bedroom, shoving the journal under your pillow. as you trailed out of your room, you closed the door behind you and braced yourself for the worst.

you shuffled back to the kitchen and picked up the stool from the floor, setting it upright. you caught a glimpse of miles unlacing his jordans at the front door. this was real.

“hey. i thought you’d still be in bed,” miles grinned as he approached you, spreading his arms for a hug. he wasn’t in his costume, but in a red hoodie and black sweats. he must’ve gone home to change. his costume probably smelled like arielle’s designer strawberry-scented perfume, the one everyone compliments her on. she never shuts up about it.

“hi,” you whispered, accepting his hug in an attempt to seem normal. “i was, but i got hungry. how was the party?”

miles smelled like his favorite cologne, except the scent was unusually potent. it wasn't faded in the slightest like it normally was after he'd been out and around other people. the deplorable amount of effort he was making just to mask the truth infuriated you. it angered you even more that he clearly wasn't planning on telling you anything. if you hadn't seen it yourself, you might've never known.

“it was ight,” he shrugged, loosening his grip on you after a couple of seconds. you hated yourself for wanting to hug him for just a little while longer. he sure as hell didn’t deserve it, but for all you knew, that was the last time you’d be in his embrace. he let his hands fall down to your waist instead and it made you shiver on contact knowing he had his hands on arielle's waist not even a full hour ago. “would’ve been better with you there, y’know. you feelin’ okay now?"

“mostly, yeah,” you responded blandly, your throat tight and your voice fairly groggy. “still a bit tired.”

you didn’t know how to bring it up. this wasn't something you could beat around the bush about. you found yourself deep in thought. so deep to the point where you didn't notice that miles had started talking. you were busy staring off into space with half-lidded eyes, way past his gaze. he clocked it and moved his head so that your eyes were boring into his by force, his eyebrows lowering in concern.

“is everything okay?”

you cleared your throat and gently pushed his arms off your waist, stepping back as you began to blink back tears. there was no easing into it. standing there in front of miles pretending like everything was okay was already bad enough. it felt like you were twisting the knife that he plunged into your chest. eyes glossy, you swallowed hard and batted your lashes a few more times, desperately trying to rid of the tears that threatened to spill.

“i know you kissed arielle at the party,” you barely managed to speak the full sentence, your voice cracking when you spoke her name. “and i’m confused.”

miles’ eyebrows knitted to be one as if this news stunned him. you wished you could hear all his thoughts from start to finish after you spoke. you wanted to know whether he was planning to lie or tell the truth. would he gaslight you or admit to his wrongdoings? you wouldn’t find out now because you didn’t give him an option. this already hurt enough and it would end the same either way.

“nae told me. and she sent me pictures.”

silence fell between the two of you. it felt like it was eating you from the inside. the chirping of the crickets outside and the noise from the refrigerator running slightly compensated for it. not much.

“i just wanna know why you did it. and why her? why the girl that hates me with every last atom in her body?” you broke the silence, shrugging your shoulders. you were hugging your arms, rubbing them in an up-and-down motion as if you were cold.

miles was dumbfounded, guilt painting his features. he couldn’t meet your eyes anymore. you wondered what you would say if you were in his shoes, but it didn’t give you any insight because you knew you'd never do this to him, so you gave up. instead, you stared at the neat middle part in between his two signature braids that cascaded down the back of his head, down to his shoulders. you’d braided his hair only a couple days ago, back when nothing seemed impossible—nothing like now.

though he wasn’t, miles’ hair still looked clean, freshly done even. what if arielle had redone his braids for him? she did say she was practicing, and she'd made it a goal to practice on him. you mentally cursed yourself for worrying about something as minuscule as miles' braids at a time like this. you didn't want to give yourself another reason to freak, but your brain wouldn’t let you rest. not even in silence. if miles wasn’t going to give you an answer, you’d send him on his way and come up with one by yourself.

“i don’t know why i did it,” he finally retorted.

“oh, word?” you laughed humorlessly. you were trying not to slap the hell out of his shamefully beautiful face. “it happened not even two hours ago. you know why you did it. your memory is sharp, it always has been, so tell me.”

miles exhaled, rubbing the palm of his hand on his forehead. “look, she came onto me while i was grabbing a soda. it was a heat-of-the-moment kind of thing! it didn’t mean any—“

“that’s what they all say, morales,” you cut him off with a scoff. “it didn’t mean anything but somehow you traveled from the kitchen downstairs to a spare bedroom upstairs so you could swap spit without anyone catching you?!” miles tried to speak, but you cut him off again. “were you even gonna tell me? because you came up in here acting like shit was sweet as if you weren’t just making out with the girl you swore i’d never have to worry about, meanwhile, i was home, sick! a fucking cold, miles!”

“i wasn’t gonna keep it to myself. i didn’t wanna hurt you,” miles said, pinching the bridge of his nose. “it wasn’t gonna happen again, i swear.”

none of the words miles spoke were convincing enough for you in the slightest, so you disregarded them.

“did i do something to you? are you holding a grudge about something and trying to get me back?!” you yelled, your voice trembling.

“no, it has nothing to do with you!” he hollered back, squeezing his eyes shut as if he was stressed out. he had no right.

“so then why the fuck would you go and do this shit?!” you were silent for a few seconds, chest heaving up and down while your heart beat out of your chest. your breath was sprinting away from you and you were trying to catch it. "it's bad enough that you kissed another girl, but arielle?"

miles pleaded, “it was a mistake.”

“damn right it was!” you narrowed your eyes to slits. “i can’t believe i trusted you, like, seriously. you’re sick.”

“i let you down, princessa, i know, i’m—“

“sorry?” you finished his sentence, folding your arms. you were far more angry than sad now. “miles, you weren’t sorry when you were kissing her. don’t be sorry now either. you were gonna kiss me with her bright pink lipgloss dried on your lips like it was nothing. you were gonna sit here and play me like i'm stupid. you were never gonna tell me!”

miles couldn’t counter that. he knew you were right, so it was back to uncomfortable silence apart from your hefty breathing and sniffles. miles had never seen you so angry. you'd never seen yourself so angry. there was no one else to blame but miles. you had no idea where to go from there. it was only after you asked the question that you were about to ask on impulse that you realized you should’ve wrapped this up many minutes before.

“is this the only time this has happened?”

miles was hesitant, his eyes growing wider. “yes!” he spat.

miles had a tell—not just his disinclination to answer your question the way he normally would, but also the way his eyebrows would position as if he wasn’t so sure himself. his teeth would clench behind his sealed lips, but you could tell because his jaw was tight and he swallowed hard, and he wouldn’t know what to do with his hands.

you knew all of this about miles, yet you felt like you were gazing into the eyes of a stranger.

this wasn’t the miles you fell in love with.

you muttered under your breath, “you know what? i’m wasting your time... and my own. you won’t have an answer that’s both truthful and something i wanna hear. we’re done, you and i. give me the key and get the hell out.”

“mami, come on—“

“nigga, deuces! i said leave!” you snapped as you backed away from him, holding your hand out.

miles dug deep in the right pocket of his black sweats, handing you the key. you flinched when your skin made contact with his. you didn't hesitate to trap the key in the palm of your hand, dropping your arm back down by your side. miles sighed to himself and trudged to the door to lace his shoes back up. you didn't even watch him leave, opting to turn around and battle the tears threatening to spill from your eyes instead. when you finally heard the front door shut, you rushed to lock it. you turned around and pressed your back to the door, face twisted in pure disbelief.

this was real.

you slid down to the floor and pulled your knees to your chest, your cries echoing through your empty house. you’d never been more grateful that your father was gone for the weekend. miles wouldn’t have heard the end of it. at least now you had time to make up some lie to cover for miles' ass, and it'd be the last damn time.

not even five minutes passed before someone knocked on the front door three times and you sniffled. miles was going to drive you insane. “go the fuck away!”

“it’s me, baby,” a muffled voice said from outside, but it’s one you recognize, and it’s most definitely not miles.

you wiped your tears with the sleeve of miles’ hoodie and stood up, twisting the lock to open the door for your best friend. she was holding a box of pizza in her hand with a tote bag strap over her shoulder.

“you’re early,” you mumbled, one of your hands pressed against the rim of the door.

“i ubered home and got my car. when i got here, i just parked and waited,” nae pushed past you. you closed the door and locked it again, following her to the kitchen, where she set the box of pizza down on the countertop. “you wouldn’t have called me either way. i know you.”

she was right. you weren’t mad at her for being there though. she had always been so good to you.

nae walked over to the dining table and placed her tote bag in one of the chairs. “i brought your favorite type of pizza, and i stopped by the store to grab some snacks and soda. those are still in my car though, so—”

“i don’t think i can stomach anything right now,” you stated as you rubbed your arm. “i broke up with miles.”

saying that out loud felt weird. and final.

“oh, my love,” nae’s brows lowered and she shuffled over to you with open arms. she wrapped them around you and you did the same, sighing into her shoulder. you really didn't want to cry.

it hadn’t been long and you were already over feeling the way you did. you wanted to fast forward to the part where you got over miles for good. as an attempt to console you, nae was rubbing your back in a circular motion.

“you did the right thing,” she spoke lowly.

you withdrew from the hug and slightly opened your mouth, fixing to ask nae a question only god knew how to answer. “why did he do it though?”

she led you to the couch in your living room and sat you down, massaging her thumb over yours in a back-and-forth motion as your hand stayed clasped in hers. you stared down at your lap, sniffling every couple of seconds and swiping away stray tears.

“boys are just greedy, babe,” she shook her head. “so very greedy. they want it all. there are so many different reasons why people cheat. it’s difficult to pinpoint just one. my random guess is that… miles has issues?"

“issues?”

“mm-hmm,” she hummed. “internally. maybe he's insecure about himself, i don't know. whatever it is, it doesn’t justify infidelity. you were more than enough, it was him who was lacking."

“i don't get it. i mean, none of this makes any sense… unless i'm blind or stupid, it came out of nowhere. literal thin air. and when i asked, he said he didn't know why he kissed her,” you muttered.

nae sighed. “even if he isn't lying, he still did it.”

“i know,” you nodded. “and i'm sure it wasn't the first time. that’s why i left him.”

“and i’m so proud of you for that,” nae gave your hand a tight squeeze. “walking away isn’t easy for anyone. it takes forever for some people, but you did it just like that.”

“yeah, well, i kinda had to. it’s bad enough that arielle is gonna rub it in my face until we graduate, and even after that, she’ll probably find a way to .”

“there won’t be any of that,” nae promised. “miles isn’t going to take her seriously—if he even takes her at all. he lost you because of what he did with that bitch. he won’t even be able to look at her without feeling guilty.”

“she can have him, i don’t care either way,” you scoffed. that was a lie. you did care. you cared more than you’d let on if you ever even admit it.

“yeah, you do,” nae raised an eyebrow as if she had effortlessly read your mind. “let yourself feel. it’s how you’ll heal.”

“oh, i’m feeling alright. i’m weighing the pros and cons of murder,” you shakily exhaled, balling up your fists and closing your eyes. “i can’t believe this nigga. seriously.”

“i’d help you, but i’m not going to jail for him and neither are you.”

you let out a soft sigh, your gaze now fixed on your lap. the tears welling up in your eyes were beginning to cloud your vision. how someone could throw away so many years of loving one another so easily was so far beyond you.

“nae, i’ve been with miles for so long. he’s always been there—i don’t know how to be without him. he’s why i gave love a chance after swearing not to... now he’s shattered my perception of it. the worst part is i should hate him, but i don't. somehow, i still love him and—”

“hey,” nae cut you off. “that’s normal. how you feel is normal.”

you sniffled. “is it?"

“pshh, girl, yeah,” nae assured you, flicking out her wrist. “listen, breakups are terrible. you’re gonna cry and scream. you’re gonna wish you never met him. you’re going to go through old texts, swipe through old photos, and mope in his hoodies. all of that is okay. the worst thing you could ever do to yourself is force yourself not to feel,” nae paused. “if this is who he really is, then it's not your loss. i know it doesn't feel like that right now, but trust me... it just takes time. i don't know how long, but i know my best friend, so no matter how long it takes, you’ll be better than good without miles. i promise." "i'm still gonna miss him," you muttered, sniffling and drying your tears as they fell. nae wrapped her arm around you and exhaled. you sobbed into her shoulder, releasing all the pent-up frustration you'd been concealing in the name of keeping your cool. you'd never felt so inconsolable in your life. "i know, babe. i know."

❤︎₊ ⊹

it was late. 3:28am. time had never moved so slowly. you were genuinely considering calling 911 and telling them you were suffering from a heart attack. you were thoroughly convinced that this was damn near the same exact thing.

the moon wasn’t full tonight, but a waning crescent. it reflected you and how soulless and dejected you felt. the moonshine bleeding through your curtains was also the only source of light you would tolerate, the rest of your bedroom completely dark. you lay on your side facing the window, allowing the icy gusts of wind to hit your face. you were practically drowning in a sea of blankets all while still being in miles’ black hoodie.

nae was gone. she’d left about two hours ago, but not before suffocating you in countless hugs and forcing you to eat a slice of pizza and drink two glasses of water, despite your not wanting to ingest anything due to your unwavering nausea. you told her you’d be okay alone. you knew you wouldn’t and so did she, but you wanted to be alone, so she gave you your space and promised to check in on you when the sun rose. you loved nae dearly and you'd never take her for granted. you felt lucky to have such a kindhearted best friend.

you'd been in a 1v1 with your thoughts for a while now. your phone was powered off and shut away in one of your nightstand drawers to help resist urges. you hated that you wanted to call miles, but you did. you wanted to scream at him. belittle him until you just couldn’t anymore. and you wanted him to sit there and watch you do it without protest. you wanted him to be honest and tell you the truth. you wanted him to promise it would never happen again, and then you wanted to curl up under the covers of your bed with him and sob in his arms while he planted kisses on your forehead, apologizing profusely. you wanted him to tell you he loved you until you believed it again.

you couldn’t do any of that—you wouldn’t. it’d mean you have no respect for yourself. it felt like you hardly had any now, so you needed to keep the scarce amount that remained.

your thoughts were blank and sporadic all at once. you’d never been through a breakup, but you had a rough idea of how these things go, so you spent some time mapping it out in your head.

you'd eventually have to meet up to exchange one another's belongings. maybe rio would apologize on miles’ behalf and say she’d always love you. she’d call you a couple times a week. the calls would eventually come slower and grow more infrequent. soon, the calls wouldn’t come at all. even if there was the acknowledgment that rio’s arms were always open for you, they’d still feel closed. you'd treat them as such.

you'd barely eat because you couldn't stomach a single thing. you'd rot in your bed and binge all your favorite movies and shows. you'd go to war with the urge to run back to miles. you'd read old diary entries where you were gushing about how much you loved him and how amazing he was to you. you'd look back at old photos and videos. you'd reread old texts until you were sobbing so hard that you couldn't breathe.

you'd write letters that nobody was ever going to see and all the tears you shed would smudge the black ink and ruin your fancy penmanship. you'd lie to your dad and tell him that your relationship had just run its course and that you and miles needed to work on yourselves. your friends would check in on you, and of course, you'd tell them that you were okay every time, even if that was the furthest from that.

word gets around fast. when this dreadful weekend was over and monday crept up on you, you'd have to return to school and deal with the piercing stares and shameless gossip. you weren't ready for any of it, because now, everyone at school would know you as the girl who got cheated on by her long-term boyfriend for arielle. rumors would spread. words would be twisted and lies would be told, both about you and miles. in retrospect, it was all the more embarrassing for miles, but you still felt utterly humiliated. not to mention that you had no doubt in your mind that arielle was ready to run to his defense, preferably by kicking you when you're down.

sometimes, just for a fleeting moment, you'd forget about it all and your mind would go quiet. your heart wouldn't swell in longing and you wouldn't feel sick to your stomach. it never did last long before the same thoughts you desperately wanted to leave you alone started to pester you again. "but you two seemed so in love!" nosy girls at your school masking their prying motives behind what they thought were "supportive words" would soon tell you. the worst part is that you'd never know how to respond, because you thought you and miles were in love too. he was your sun and you were his moon. how could you so quickly forget that the sun didn't need the moon to shine, it was the other way around? you thought it was and always would be your heart tethered to his, but now you were left with a broken chain and a heartache.

you thought things would be different with miles. you truly did. now you knew that anyone could screw you over even if they crossed their heart. there weren't any exceptions, not anymore. miles proved that you can do everything right and still get done wrong. it wasn't fair. you should've known you weren't exempt from something like this happening, yet you still let yourself believe you were. maybe you jinxed it, or maybe you thought your case was special. maybe you thought this would never happen because you believed you were special. you only did because he made you feel that way.

you were sick and tired of brooding over your misfortune. you rolled onto your back with a frustrated groan and gaped at your ceiling, the cold air from outside still blowing against the side of your face. as exhausted as you were, sleep just wouldn't grant you sanction in its assuaging embrace.

what hurt the most is that you were so sure that you'd bagged a kind of love that was for the books. the kind of love you thought you could only dream about. though you weren't searching for him, the stars sent you miles morales. in your eyes, he was perfect. you loved and adored him, and swore he was your soulmate, made just for you. he was godsent and you never wanted to let him go, until tonight, when you learned that you were never the one who needed to hold on to begin with.

you came to the humbling conclusion that maybe the reason people told tales of faultless love was because real love was far too sickening to bear. it was merely a way to cope. nothing more, nothing less. maybe "happily ever after" had been a hoax all along. all the fairytales you had read growing up always began with “once upon a time”, but your story with miles ended with it, because loving him was easy—once upon a time.

maliland ©

#heavensent 🪽#miles morales x reader #miles morales x you #miles g morales x reader #miles morales x y/n #earth 42 miles x reader #spiderman #miles morales x black!reader #e 42 miles morales x reader #e 42 miles x black!reader #miles morales #itsv #atsv #across the spiderverse #into the spiderverse #black fem reader

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madaqueue · 1 month

Text

Practice Makes Perfect | Chapter 1

synopsis: you and yuji have been best friends basically as long as you can remember, and you made a promise to each other to stay friends and help each other be the best versions of yourselves for your future partners. but will things change when yuji finally starts looking for a relationship?

pairing: yuji itadori (18+) x f!reader

themes/content: modern college au (characters aged up to 18+). fluff, angst, language. kissing, mention of over-clothes grinding. 18+, MDNI

word count: 2.3k

a/n: baby's first multi-chapter fic, please be nice or i'll cry :) thx. also this will eventually get more intense, but we're starting light teehee

series masterlist | next chapter

You and Yuji Itadori have been friends your whole lives. You remember the day you first met on the playground in elementary school where you both insisted on racing each other to decide who got to use the tire swing first, and when you came in a dead tie you both refused to concede and ended up sitting on the swing together for the rest of recess. You stayed close as you grew up, often having sleepovers at each other's houses every weekend and spending almost every day together in and outside of school.

On one of these sleepovers while you were both sophomores in high school, you got around to discussing your first kisses and realized neither of you had had yours yet. You both agreed it wouldn't be weird to kiss each other and went for it; the only problem was that it was awful. From that day forward you both vowed to stay friends, but help each other practice all that romance stuff for whenever either of you wanted to actually date someone.

It was a miracle when you both ended up getting accepted to the same college, since one of you (*cough* Yuji) definitely slacked off a little more in high school, but you were so excited to get to spend the next four years with him.

The first semester of college went by quickly and you didn’t get to see each other too often since you came in as an engineering major and he was slowly working his way through business classes. Even though you hadn’t spent as much time together, you’d still get texts from him every few days with some stupid meal concoction he’d made in his dorm kitchen and you’d send each other TikToks that made you laugh. You let yourself fall into a rhythm between classes, homework, and exams, until one Wednesday evening you get an unexpected notification lighting up your phone:

Yuji: “heyy, come over? got a question to ask you”

The message sent butterflies through your stomach for some reason; you two hadn’t seen each other for a few weeks, and his text was much more direct than you expected. Your fingers hover over the keyboard as you think of how to respond.

You: “okayy, be over in 5. should I bring anything?”

His response almost immediately appears under yours:

Yuji: “just yourself, sweets ;)”

The nickname caught you a bit off guard and you questioned what to say next before another text came up:

Yuji: “sorry, don’t know why I said that lmao. see you soon :)”

You sigh and lock your phone, setting it down on the bed beside you before standing up and sliding your shoes, tossing on a sweatshirt on top of your leggings and cropped t-shirt before heading out.

—

You stand outside his dorm, looking at the “Yuji” name sign made out of construction paper taped to his door. Below it was a mini whiteboard he had put up that had some less-than-tasteful drawings and the note “Itadori + Fushiguro” written on it surrounded by hearts. You rolled your eyes as you knocked, the door immediately swinging open as you were greeted by the pink-haired boy wearing his standard red hoodie and jeans combo, looking down on you with a huge grin on his face.

“Welcome, welcome!” he said with a smile, ushering you inside. You looked around and realized you had never actually been in his dorm before - whenever you hung out last semester it was always at cafes, the library, or a party, but never in either of your rooms. You look around and appreciate that he actually managed to make the small space kind of nice. You smirk at the dark blue bedding on his twin size mattress and pinup posters adorning his walls as the LEDs lining the room cast a blue glow across everything.

“You like it?” Yuji asked, wiggling his eyebrows at you.

“It’s very…hmm…how do I say this…you,” you say with a smirk.

He giggles as he flops down on the bed. “Well, you did always know me well.”

You kick off your shoes and sit down onto the bed next to him. “So, what’d you have to ask me?” you question as you turn to face him.

“Right!” he exclaims, hopping off the bed to stand in front of you. “Remember when we were younger and we promised to help each other practice all the romance stuff so we’d be ready for when we get in a real relationship?” You nod as he continues. “Well, I think I might finally be ready to kick things off, and I sorta need your help with the whole practice thing.”

You freeze. This was the last thing on your mind when you came over. You hadn’t even seen Yuji in almost a month, and this is the first thing he says to you? How could he even remember that stupid deal you had made after your horrible first kiss with each other?

Your thoughts suddenly come to a halt as you realize what this might mean. “Wait,” you start, looking up at him from the bed, “does this mean you have a crush on someone?”

Yuji’s face turns red as he breaks eye contact and looks down at the ground, one arm reaching up behind his head to scratch his undercut. “Um, kinda, I think so,” he says as he grins sheepishly. “There’s a girl in one of my classes, and we’ve hung out a few times for this group project, and-“

“And you want my help making sure you know what you’re doing, right?” you cut him off. He looks back up at you, cheeks still red, and nods slightly. “Wait,” you think out loud, “does that mean you haven’t kissed anyone since then?”

His face flushes again and his eyes shoot back to the ground as he mumbles “No.”

You chuckle softly as you get up to meet him in the middle of the room, throwing your arms around his neck and tilting his chin so you’re making eye contact. You’re not sure where the sudden confidence comes from, but it just feels natural for you in that moment. In all honesty, you actually hadn’t kissed anyone since then either - you just hadn’t seen the need - but Yuji doesn’t need to know that. You gaze into his soft brown eyes as he nervously bites his lip, waiting for your response to his confession.

“Don’t worry Yu, that’s okay,” you whisper, your lips nearly grazing his, “we can practice together.”

Yuji nearly squeals with excitement, dissipating any tension or romance that was building between you two. “Yay! Thank you, thank you, thank you!” he exclaims as he wraps his arms around your waist, lifting you up in the air and spinning you around. He sets you down but his hands don’t leave your hips as he looks down at you expectantly. “Okay, where do we start?” he practically beams down at you.

You pause to think for a moment before responding. “Well, we should probably figure out where you’re starting so we can work on what actually needs to be improved.”

“Works for me!” he says, picking you up again with ease as he walks towards his bed. Your legs wrap around his waist for stability as he sits down with his back against the headboard and you in his lap. The position also gave you butterflies for some reason, which was odd since the two of you used to sit like this all the time - you in Yuji’s lap during car rides when there wasn’t enough space, your head laying across his chest while you watched movies, or even his head resting on your stomach while you tried to braid his hair. But for some reason, this time felt different, maybe because you knew what was about to happen.

“Ready?” he asked with a smile. You nod, trying to mentally prepare yourself for what you expect is going to be a repeat of your last horrible kiss. “Okay, let’s do this,” Yuji says with a soft sigh, still smiling, and you try not to laugh at his lack of seriousness about the whole situation. But before you can react, his hand reaches up to your cheek and his eyes flutter closed as he leans towards you. You let your eyes shut as his soft lips press against yours. He holds himself there for a moment before beginning to gently suck on your bottom lip. The unexpected action causes you to open your mouth slightly in surprise, and he takes the opportunity to gently slide his tongue between your lips. Your tongues meet as he gently explores your mouth with his. His hand moves from your cheek to the back of your neck, holding you close to him. At the same time, one of your hands slides up from his hips to the back of his hair and you run your fingers over the softness of his freshly-trimmed undercut.

You start to feel yourself get lightheaded as the kiss gets sloppier and Yuji shows no sign of letting up. You begin to pull yourself away to catch your breath but just as you feel the air hit your lungs he uses the hand on your neck to gently push you back towards his slightly parted lips. It’s almost as if he couldn’t stand to spend a second separated from you and you willingly lean back in as he gets more eager, his tongue effortlessly slipping back into your mouth. The action elicits a soft moan from you, and you feel heat building between your legs. Your hips almost start grinding against the boy beneath you before you remember who it is - your best friend. You open your eyes suddenly and pull away from the kiss, Yuji loosening his hold on the back of your neck as a thin thread of your shared saliva temporarily connects your lips. You are met with those sweet, brown eyes, his cheeks flushed and lips pink from the intense kiss you suddenly pulled him away from.

As your brain clears, the first thing you’re able to say to him is “What the hell?”

“What, was it alright?” he hums back through a smile.

“That was m-more than alright, there’s no way that’s only your second time ever doing that!” you stutter, trying to get the words out.

He shrugs, “What can I say? Sometimes I’m just a natural.”

You start to sit up more and lean back off his lap, when there’s a sudden noise at the door. “Dude c’mon, hop on Discord, we’re gonna play some ranked matches.” The door handle turns as the sentence finishes, and in steps a man dressed in all black with his short black hair fanning out in every direction. He takes in the scene in front of him with you and Yuji sitting on the bed and he immediately covers his eyes with his hands. “S-shit, I’m so sorry, I-I didn’t know you had someone over and I-“ he stutters as you watch his ears turn red from embarrassment.

“No need to apologize my dear friend!” Yuji proclaims as he hops off the bed, clearly no longer thinking about the intense moment you two just shared. He turns to you while gesturing towards the clearly distressed man in the doorway. “This is Fushiguro!” he yells, almost too loudly, with a smile plastered on his face.

Once the man in the door realizes that Yuji has no plans to provide any more information, he removes his hands from his eyes and politely waves at you from across the room. “Um, hi. Yeah, I’m Megumi Fushiguro, but you can just call me Megumi. I live across the hall from Yuji,” he explains, pointing over his shoulder at the door to his room.

You introduce yourself and give a little wave back. “Oh, wait a minute, you’re the Fushiguro that’s on Yuji’s sign on his door, right?” you say with a little laugh, remembering the whiteboard you saw on your way in.

“That's the one! Isn’t he charming?” Yuji sing-speaks as he practically skips towards Megumi.

The boy in black seems less than impressed with the situation and rolls his eyes. “Yep, that’s me. Again though, you can call me Megumi. I don’t know why Yuji insists on calling me by my last name, I mean we’re basically the same age-”

“Because I just loooooove your name!” Yuji exclaims, now standing next to Megumi and batting his eyelashes dramatically at him. Megumi responds by holding a hand out to his side and gently shoving Yuji, who dramatically pretends to slide down against the wall with a pout.

“Anyways, I was gonna play some video games, but if you guys are busy we can do it another night,” Megumi explains.

“Nah don’t worry, I should probably head home anyways and make some dinner, I’ll leave you boys to it,” you say as you stand up to put your sweatshirt back on, trying to ignore the pulsing between your legs.

Still sitting on the ground, Yuji chimes in, “Aww, you don’t want me to make you dinner here?”

“I don’t think I want to eat the things you make if they’re anything like the meals you’ve been sending me over the past semester,” you preempt.

“Oh man, he’s shown you those too?” Megumi responds with a smirk as he reaches a hand out to help Yuji off the floor.

Yuji stands up proudly, stating “You guys just don’t understand my culinary genius.”

“I wouldn’t call a strawberry Poptart with cheese on it ‘culinary genius,’” you say with a chuckle as a pout returns to Yuji’s face. You put your shoes on and slide past the boys in the doorway. “Anyways, goodnight Yuji, and it was nice to meet you Megumi!” you wave back at them from the hallway.

—

When you get back to your dorm, you’re finally able to process the events that just took place. All you’re left with is more questions.

When did he learn how to kiss like that? How did he learn how to kiss like that? And why do you want more of it so badly?

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atalentedwriter · 10 months

Text

— don't make it harder on me

paring: e-1610!miles x femspidey!reader (both spider people)

a/n: i don't speak spanish i'm sorry but i used the most accurate translator i could find. if i made ANY mistakes, feel free to hmu and tell me i will certainly change em.

sypnosis: in which the reader was in love with miles but of course you were everything he didn't want, until you finally found someone for you and things...flipped. loosely based off chloe x halle's "don't make it harder on me"

wordcount: 1,768 words 9,150 characters

genre: fluff, teenagers, romance, unrequited love, angst, slightly suggestive but not really, cheater/cheating

translations: "i don't know because just last year you told me you loved me." - "no lo sé porque justo el año pasado me dijiste que me querías." "what do you want out of here mami?" - "¿qué quieres salir de aquí mami?" "my life" - "mi vida" "butterfly" - "mariposa" "cherry" - "cereza" "my goodness" - "dios mio"

You giggle as the boy you're with kisses your cheek before leaving the student lounge. He had walked you here but now he had class and had to leave. He pushed your headphones down to your shoulders as he backed up looking at you with a goofy grin.

"So you can hear the bell, I know how loud you be blasting your music girl." He says, chuckling before leaving.

"Thanks Grant." You say as you watch him leave with heart eyes. Miles, the unlucky one had to witness it all unfold in front of him, in front of his burger and drink and sketchbook.

"Grant? What is he? An uncle?" He says, too disgusted with what unfolded in front of him to even continue drawing.

You roll your eyes and look at him. "Whatever." You say as you get up, walking over to the vending machine as Miles follows you.

"So what you love him now or somethin?" He says, a bit offended and disgusted at the thought.

"And if I said I did? What would the problem be?" You ask as Miles grumbled something under his breath.

"no lo sé porque justo el año pasado me dijiste que me querías..."

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

But you picked it up thanks to your heightened senses. A year ago, you were over the heels in love with Miles, but he was in love with Gwen. Like I'm talking, sketches and doodles all OVER the notebook in love. Long story short, you confessed and he didn't reciprocate, like not even a little bit.

You were worried that it was going to ruin the good friendship you had going but Miles was more than willing to put it aside so your relationship wouldn't get damaged. It was hard and awkward at first because you had so much love for the boy...it was hard not to. But you got over it, or at least the most you could, and you found someone else.

Grant. A bit of an adult name but he's an absolute prince charming. He's always considering and caring, and treats you with the utmost princess treatment. He's so perfect, almost too perfect. Made you skeptical that people as good and genuine as him could exist, and he made it known that he really did love you.

You sighed and looked at Miles who was already looking at you with a small smile on his face. He put his hand on your waist and moved you to the side a little, walking in front of the vending machine.

"¿qué quieres salir de aquí mami?" He asked and you sighed, placing a hand on your hips and rolling your eyes.

"Miles-"

"Let me take care of you mami." He said as he took out a wrinkled dollar from his pocket, putting it into the vending machine and all you could do was laugh.

"Strawberry cake...the one in the can." You replied and he got it for you, leaning down to pick up your canned cake with a fork and handing it over to you, making sure to brush your fingers.

So corny. You look up to see Miles looking at you with a dazed look.

"I know what you're trying to do Miles.." You say, taking your cake and walking back to your beanbag chair with Miles on your heel like a puppy.

"What? I don't know anything." He says as he sits across from you, placing his head in his palm, batting his lashes at you. "But uh...tell me anyway."

"I need you to stop lookin' at me like that. We are just friends now. You already had your chance" You blatantly say as you take a deep sigh before attempting to open your can.

It seemed like what you just said flew in one of Miles' ears and out the other because he was smitten. "Let me help you with that mi vida..."

He took the can from your hand lightly and with ease. You'd think with your superhuman strength, you'd be able to open a can but

"I swear they use gorrila glue to close those cans." You say, taking the can back from Miles. You take your plastic fork to dig into your cake as he smiles at you.

"You're so cute yknow, especially when you get flustered, not being able to do the simplest things. It's adorable. You're adorable." Miles says, being upfront with his feelings for the first time in a long while.

You pause chewing the cake in your mouth as you look at Miles.

"I need you to stop sayin' the things you say cuz if you keep acting so sweet, i might just wake up and leave this boy that i pinky swear we'd be together for sure" You say as you sigh again, chewing your cake as Miles shrugs.

"Mariposa...what happened?"

"Huh-?"

"I'm just saying, you used to be so hung up on me."

"You didn't even notic-"

"Yeah but when you told me and I looked back, I realized, the signs were all there! You literally once straight up told me you thought of me like all the time...what happened to those thoughts?"

"I can't be thinking of you when I'm alone with my boo-"

"So he's like your 'boo thang' now?" Miles says.

"Please don't ever say that." You say, cracking a small smile as some icing gets stuck on the corner of your lips.

Miles notices and uses his thumb to wipe it off before putting it in between his lips, staring you straight in the eye with a small smile.

"Okay no. If you smile at me again, I may do somethin' stupid-."

"So do it (y/n)"

"Miles.."

"I don't get it. Why did you stop liking me?"

"What? Did you expect me to just wait around till you stopped liking Gwen?" You raise an eyebrow as he stays silent.

"...Kinda..?"

You roll eyes.

"I mean 'love' is a VERY strong word and yknow when someone says it to you, you kinda expect it to be relevant for a long time."

"Oh, I just remembered..."

"What?"

"How many girls you had!" You angrily voiced at the boy.

"It was just Gwen." Miles countered, putting his hands up.

"But you loved her a lot, didn't you? I mean you said you did and love is a 'very strong word'" You said, mocking and quoting the boy from just earlier, causing his lips to form a tight line and his eyes to close momentarily.

"You didn't like me Miles and I moved on, I don't get how that is a problem and blah blah blah blah blah"

He has no idea what you were saying, he tuned you out a few seconds ago, just focusing on your features. He had realized his romantic feelings for you about 9 months after your confession, you had just started seeing Grant and for some reason he couldn't stand him.

Maybe it was his rich ass cologne or his thick accent, or maybe how perfect he looked in general but he did know he hated seeing you with him. It just irked him.

"Guys like that only date girls like you with one thing in their mind."

"What so are you saying I can't bag a rich guy?" You say, offended as you looked at Miles who put his hands up in defense.

"Woah, woah now I didn't say all that ma.."

"Then what are you trying to say? Enlighten me! Tell (y/n)"

See now he knew you were ticked off, you only referred to yourself in 3rd person if you were ready to smack someone hard. And you feelings were valid, ever since you started seeing Grant he was always policing you around, talking about how he didn't like him, Grant was a bad guy and he was always looking for faults in his motives and moves. You didn't do that with Gwen though.

He realized he liked you a few weeks in and he beat himself up every day for rejecting you. Since then he tried to win you back, or at least that's what he thinks he's doing, to you he's just insulting your relationship and making a fool out of himself...a stupid, idiotic, embarrassing, infuriatingly adorable fool.

"So you need to stop bein' so nice to me, 'cause a part of me has moved on...but a part of me is so weak" You confess, putting your fingers on your nose bridge as Miles finally tuned back in.

"So listen to that part cereza." Miles' said leaning.

"Miles Gonzalo Morales..-"

"I love you." He cut you off abruptly, surprising both you and himself.

"What..?" You say, taken aback as Miles bites his lips, looking down and then back up at you.

"I...I think I love you..I do and I mean it...I love you. I love you (y/n)"

You were in disbelief. These words that you would've have been so delighted to hear just a year ago now felt like a burden, a huge burden. Something you dreaded, it felt like the entire reality you spent months fixing and putting up came crashing down with those 3 words and stupid 8 letters.

"Miles...dios mio...don't make it harder on me. I told you not to love me....and now you're growing on me." You slumped in your seat, not even realizing you blew your own cover.

He looked up, hopefully with a smirk. "I did, didn't I?" He had that same goofy grin he always had on and looked so good in.

"I told you not to want me but you don't listen to me...and you never did." You frown as the boy leans in.

"Well that's a good thing right?"

"Morales."

"Baby I'm serious. I know I don't take a lot of things seriously but I'm not playing now. I love you."

He leaned in, closed his eyes and connected his lips with yours, it left sparks flowing through your body. He paused and pulled back only a little before opening his eyes to look at your reaction.

You were frozen for a second there before you grabbed his face and pulled him back in for a kiss, leaving a smile to form on his face. He used one arm to wrap around your waist, pulling you onto his lap, and resting his hand on your lap.

You wrap your arms around his neck as the kiss gets heated and turns into a full-blown makeout session. You're so lost in each other that you never notice Grant standing a few feet away with your favorite chocolates and a gift bag in hand.

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gallilovesf1 · 11 days

Text

P1 Into You: Goodnight

🏁 Character Introductory 🏁

MASTERLIST

Pairings (applied to the whole fic): Sergio Pérez x FemHorner!Reader, Toto Wolff x FemHorner!Reader, Lewis Hamilton x FemHorner!Reader

Warnings: Slow burn, mentions of sexual topic, Dom/Sun dynamic, Soft Dom! Sergio, Dom! Toto, angst, cheating, fluff, mentions of death

Author's Note: I haven't seen someone write for Sergio so I'll just do it myself, this will be a long fic so bare with me! Enjoy!🏁🏎️

══════☆════════════☆══════

You graduated as a mechanical engineer at Harvard University, honestly it's one of your greatest achievements in life. Before your mother passed you promised to her that you’ll be a mechanical engineer just like her and you did, years of studying hard, all those sleepless nights, it eventually pays off.

Of course as expected, your dad's not happy on what you've done, you did what he also wanted, worked as one of the engineers in Red bull, you expect him to compliment you for a little but he didn't, except he pressured you enough to cry every night, blaming yourself that why aren't you good enough for your dad to be proud at you, but the good thing is your brother, Jonathan. One of the drivers in red bull is supporting you, you and him always have the best bonds as siblings. He teaches you some stuff on formula one, telling you the basics, like the teams and its drivers, team principal. Besides that he also supports you as an artist, growing up you always love drawings, you always tell your parents how much you love doing tiny doodles and showing it to them, but as always the only person who cares about you is your mom and your brother.

“Y/N?” Your brother says as you snapped back into reality, “Earth to Y/N?” “What-?” “I said, Dad needs us in the paddock, are you coming?” “Yeah, give me a minute-” you said as you grabbed your phone as you and your brother went to the paddock.

You and your brother arrived in the paddock as your saw checo, your best friend and also one of the drivers of red bull alongside your brother.

You met checo at your brothers first win in sakhir grand prix 2020, Checo’s on podium 1 while your brother is in podium 3, you're so happy for your brother that day, checo and your brother celebrated their victory as a team, later that night the red bull team threw a party and you had a blast, you made some new friends, talk so some new faces, until checo approached you, “Y/n, Right?” He smiled shyly as he looked at you up and down, “Yes, that's right, You're Sergio, right? Congrats by the way, you did so well earlier!” You complimented him as he smiled at you, ‘god he's handsome’ you thought, “Ah- Thank you, that's- really thank you.” Checo's cheeks turned light pink, “Call me checo, everyone calls me that and I think you should too.” He smiled, “Checo” you said as you liked the way his name sounds, “Yeah-” he chuckled.

Since then you and checo got really close, he always treats you, going on a dinner date with him, watching a movie with him, having some fun time together, and lastly going in some art museums around the world whenever the team travels for the race.

He knows that you're a big fan of art, he knows that you always liked drawings as a kid up till now, he thinks that you deserve to be treated like what he's doing, making you feel worth it and not neglected.

“Y/N, Luz solar-” says checo as you heard his little nickname for you, “Checoooo!” You run towards him as you give him a tight hug as if you haven't seen each other in years, “How are you?” You said as you smiled up at him, “I'm doing good, Miel, how about you did you enjoy the city here in Mexico?” He smiled at you, “Yeah! I liked it here already, though I haven't explored the city yet since you know, dad always needed me here” you rolled your eyes as checo chuckled, “Luz solar, I'll tell you what, after the practice we can go and take a look at the city, we can eat and maybe find some museum to go in.” He smiled as I pats your shoulders, “Can I come?” Your brother says as he looks at checo then to you, “ye-” “No.” You said “¿Porque mi amor?” (Why, my love) Checo says as he looks at you confused, You chuckled, “Dummy of course you can go! You two are my supporters, I wouldn't be like this if you guys weren't here for me!” You smiled to both of them as checo and your brother chuckled, “Ah, sí, after the race ok? We'll talk about it later-" Checo winks at you as he leaves, leaving you and your brother.

“I swear he likes you-” your brother teased as he scoffed, “He's literally way much older than me, what do you mean?” You looked at him confused, “C’mon, you and checo have been friends for 4 years now and you think checo doesn't like you? He always treats you like you're his wife!” Your brother said as he chuckled, “He's always like that, I think he's just kind and sweet, he knows everything between me and dad, so maybe he's just making me feel appreciated in a way he can.” You said as you had flashbacks of your moments with checo.

It's true, Checo's been treating you as if you're his wife. Honestly, you find checo attractive and god he's so perfect, his eyes, his face, the way he looks at you whenever he talks and listens when you're talking. You liked him, but you just don't know how you will say it to him, you don't want your friendship with him to go to waste if your relationship with him didn't work out.

─ ⋆ ────── ⋆ ────── ⋆ ──

The Free practice was done and you cheered your brother and checo as they got the pole position 1 and 2, Checo is in P1 while your brother is in P2, his highest position so far in this season.

“You did great!” You said as you hugged your brother, “Thank you sis! I'm excited for tomorrow-” your brother replied as he pulls away from the hug, You saw checo walking towards you while smiling, “Checoooo- you did great P1 is your highest so far! I'm proud of you-” you cheered as you hugged checo, “Thank you, Mi amor, Are we still going out though?” “Hell yes!” You said as you looked checo in the eyes, admiring his brown eyes, “Way to go checo!” Your brother said as they hugged each other, “You did well too.” Checo smiled as they both pulled away from each other, “C’mon let's get out of here I'm excited to explore the city!” You said as the three of you went to change clothes.

─ ⋆ ────── ⋆ ────── ⋆ ──

The three of you arrived in a restaurant, not far away from the paddock, you entered first as you bumped into a tall man, you felt like you bumped into some hard wall, “I'm so-” you said as you looked up seeing The team principal of Mercedes, Toto Wolff.

“I'm sorry-” you said shyly as you looked up at him, ‘Fuck, he's tall.’ you thought, he leans down at you slightly, “It's ok, don't apologize.” He said, smirking down at you.

“Is that Toto?” Your brother says, asking Checo, “Yeah and that's Y/N talking to toto?” They both looked at each other confused. “Y/N-” checo called your name as you looked behind you seeing your brother and checo walking towards you, “I'm really sorry I didn't see you passing by-” you apologize again as you lowered your head in embarrassment, Toto said nothing as he looked down on you as he nodded and left.

“You ok?” Checo said as he looked at you slightly confused, “Yeah, I just didn't see him that's all-” you said smiling at him, “Toto? You didn't see him?” Your brother chuckled as he teased you, “I Don't know, I don't even know who he is, ok?” You said chuckling. “That's the team principal of Mercedes, one of our rival teams, dad hates that guy.” Your brother replied, “That's him?!” You said shocked, “Yeah, your father and Toto are not the best of friends.” Checo said as he looked at your brother and you, ‘Why would dad hate him, he looks kind though-’ you thought, “Hmm, I see, let's just forget it- we need to celebrate for what happened on the practice earlier!” You said as you smiled at Checo and your brother.

─ ⋆ ────── ⋆ ────── ⋆ ──

The three of you sat down as Checo asked the waiter for the menu, the three of you took a while from choosing what to eat, “Since it's your hometown, why don't you tell us what's the best food to order?” You said looking at Checo while smiling, “Yeah!” Your brother agreed as checo grins “Ok- how about we choose this?” He said pointing at ‘Torta’ in the menu, “Torta? What's that?” You asked, “Well it's like a sandwich filled with a lot of vegetables and meat-” he said looking at you then your brother, “Well that's sounds delicious to me-” your brother said smiling as checo looks at you, “What about you Y/N?” “Hmm I want to try it!” You said as Checo smiled at your words.

Few minutes later all of your orders have arrived, checo ordered a torta with a diet coke on the side, your brother ordered the same, while you ordered a torta and a sparkling water, the three of you ate and exchange conversation, you liked the food that Sergio suggest to eat, “So, why did you bumped into Toto earlier?” Your brother asked, making checo nod, “Yeah, it's impossible for you not to see him, that guy is tall!” You chuckled, “Well yeah I didn't kinda see him because I was admiring the outside view of the restaurant, plus I'm really excited so I didn't bother to look In Front of me, the next thing I realized is that I felt like I bumped into a wall-” The three of you chuckled, “That's a weird and funny interaction of you and toto- is that the first time you saw him in person?” Checo asked, “Well…Yeah- given that dad only describes him with words and I only saw him in interviews and pictures, so I wasn't expecting he'll be that intimidating…” ‘and damn hot…’ you thought.

The three of you exchanged conversation as you remember that there's a museum close by the restaurant, “Checo, can we go to the museum across the street, please?” You begged as you gave Checo an irresistible eye, checo chuckled, “I don't know should we go, Johnathan?” Checo asked your brother as they teased you, “Hmm let me think about it checo-” Your brother teases you too, you looked at them unimpressed, “alright, ok, jeez-” your brother says as checo chuckled, checo paid the bill as the three of you head out, checo and your brother searched the museum that you might like, “Y/n, what about this?” says checo showing you a picture of ‘Museo de la Ciudad de Mexico’, “Wow- that looks so beautiful…” you said as checo looks at you saying “Yeah, Beautiful…”

You, Checo, and your brother arrived in the museum, you proceeded inside as Checo and your brother bought some tickets. Inside you saw a lot of beautiful carved stones with a lot of symbols in it, you took a picture to post it later on your Instagram, “Enjoying already, Y/N?” Checo asked seeing you taking a picture, “Yeah- these are beautiful-” You chuckled, as you saw your brother having his alone time at the other part of the museum, you and checo strolled along the museum, checo took some pictures of you, “We should take a picture!” You smiled as Checo seemed to be surprised, “Yeah, ok” you took out your phone as you took a photo of you and Checo, Checo's arms are on your shoulders as he looks at you, while you're looking at the camera smiling. You smiled at Checo, “Should we post that? I mean ya know?” As a mechanic of redbull and Checo a red bull driver, you don't want controversy or issues in the paddock, so whenever you and checo are going out or taking pictures you always ask him permission or he will ask you permission to post the pictures, “Of course- it'll be good for your Instagram eh?” He chuckled, “ok ok- I'll just tag you and Jonathan-”

─ ⋆ ────── ⋆ ────── ⋆ ──

After thousands of pictures with Checo and your brother you decide to go home to get ready for qualifying tomorrow, “I'll see you guys tomorrow ok? And I know that both of you will do well tomorrow.” You hugged your brother and checo, “Thanks sis! Love ya!” Your brother said as he opened his hotel room door, waving to Checo and you.

Your brother lives in 4th floor of the hotel, while you and checo lives in 5th floor, he said he wanted to be close to you just Incase you need anything, you find it very thoughtful of him, I mean…he's always like that to you, sometimes you think why you and checo aren't together.

You and Checo entered the elevator, he pushed the number 5 button as you posted the pictures on your Instagram, tagging checo and your brother. Silence filled the elevator, Checo's the one who breaks the silence first, “So, how did it go? Did you enjoy it?” He looks at you with full admiration, your eyes lit up “Yes! I enjoyed it a lot- I wasn't expecting Mexico to be a beautiful place, so thank you Checo.” You smiled at Checo as the elevator door opened. You walks out first then checo, standing In Front of your door as checo took a picture of you, you chuckled, “What's that for?” “Nothing, you just look beautiful.” He smiled, “Hmm..” you opened your door as you turned to face checo, “Thank you for today checo, You're the best.” You said tip toeing and kissing checo on the cheeks, “Goodnight, I'll see you tomorrow.” You saw Checo's face turned red, you went inside your room quickly, closing the door behind you, ‘Fuck, why did I do that-’ you thought as you sat on the floor.

Checo's still standing outside your door, still shocked by what you just did, “Goodnight too…” he mumbled, smiling as he left going to the other door beside your room, opening it as he caressed his face where your lips once were.

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Omg I hope you like it! This part of the fic is All about checo and Y/N, and of course the meet of Y/N and toto!!

Taglist: (Let me know if you want to be added to our taglist!🏁)

@cheyxfu

@simbelmyne20niniel

@barcelonaloverf1life

#toto wolff x reader #toto wolff #mercedes #red bull formula 1 #red bull racing #sergio perez #checo perez #sergio checo pérez #f1 fic #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 #f1 fanfic #mercedes formula one #mercedes f1

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hazenllas · 6 months

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Can't Get Enough II Hazel Callahan

Pairings: Hazel Callahan x reader

Warnings(?): kissing, tiny bit of angst, mentions of break up, fluff at the end

(Apologies for any spelling mistakes, english isn't my first language)

Summary: After 7 months without any contact with each other, you somehow end up at your ex's front door?

"So, your'e breaking up with me? Over long distance? Hazel, we can figure it out somehow. I promise you." You say with tears welling up in your eyes.

You are moving across the state because your mother found a new job and you have no other choice but to join her.

"Y/n, you know how i feel about long distance relationship! We will lose contact and find someone better! This is just the way it has to be, i'm sorry." Hazel states holding your small hands in her big ones while looking int your eyes searching for an answer.

"Whatever, Hazel. I really really can't do this right now. Have a great life i guess." You respond, not even looking at her so she doesn't see the tears streaming down your face. You turn away from her and walk away. Hazel made you lose control over everything since that day. You were a mess. but what would anyone expect? You were an 18 year old girl who just went through a break up with the girl you loved and valued most and put her before anything and anyone else.

It's been 7 months. 7 months since you moved, 7 months since you and Hazel broke up. 7 months of you and Hazel not speaking to one another once. It was torture. Fighting the urge to apologize from running away from the situation instead of properly ending things. Fighting the urge not to ask if shes found anyone new, because you certainly haven't. Trying to get through this breakup was hell for you and everything made you think of her. Hell, you found a drawing of a flower on the sidewalk pavement and you thought of Hazel.

You get a call from your mom that you will be moving back to your hometown to live with your cousin, PJ and her mom because your mom found a new boyfriend and will be going on multiple buisness trips and no one will be capable of watching you. Thankful that your hometown is only a few hours from here, you quickly gathered and packed your things to get ready to travel. As your mom is driving you towards your cousin's house, nervousness hits you as you remember about Hazel. since PJ is friends with her, you might have to face her.

You wave your mom goodbye, and she backs out of the narrow driveway. You knock on the door, as it swings open revealing a very excited PJ. "Hey Y/n! Welcome back!" PJ practically yells. She gives you a big hug and allows your to enter the house. Your aunt greets you as you greet her back, following PJ up the stairs, to her room. "So, I think we should invite the girls over, to come and see you again, and just have a little group hangout. Just like the old times!" PJ speaks, sitting on her bed." "PJ, ive only been gone for 7 months! it hasn't been that long." You respond laughing. PJ rolls her eyes and texts Josie, Isabel, Brittany, and of course, Hazel. "Listen, i know you might not want to see hazel after you know, but you need to talk to her a bit! She misses you a lot you know." PJ says, not looking up from her cellphone. you take those words deep into your thoughts. you can't talk to her! that is scary to even think about. You just shake it off and wait for your friends to arrive.

You are welcomed by a whole bunch of hellos and hug, each girl seeing you and running up to you. You can't lie, you missed them all while being away. "Wow Y/n, you didn't change much did you? Well, seems you just got sexier while away!" Brittany says, looking at you. Each girl is talk to you, well, except for one. Hazel. She kept her distance from you and the group and just stares at her white converse. It is like this the whole time the girls are over and it's driving you mad.

After pacing around an overthinking for the past, forever, you finally decide to go to Hazel's. You know its a bad idea but you can't take this anymore you need her, and well, to talk to her. After begging PJ to drive you over to Hazel's, because you don't have a car, she finally agrees. It is pouring outside so all the sound that is in the car is PJ cursing at the blurry windows ahead of her caused by the continuous raindrops. Finally getting to a stop, you are infront of Hazel's house. Or should i say, mansion. "Good luck champ." PJ sighs, patting your shoulder. "Thanks PJ. Ill text you when im ready to leave." You say, getting out of the car. You wave at PJ before turning towards Hazel's house. You take a deep breath before knocking on Hazel's door. It takes a bit, and you realize you a drenched from the rain. Hazel finally answers, looking down at you in shock. "Y/n? Shit, your soaked. Come in." Hazel gestures you to walk in. you whisper a quiet 'thank you' before walking inside. She quickly heads towards the closet with the towels, and handing you a purple one. "Uh so, what are you doing here?" Hazel asks looking you up and down. "I uh i wanted to talk, if that's okay with you Haze." Shit. 'Haze' a nickname you called her when you both were dating. "Yeah yeah sure come on lets sit on the couch." She answers, walking towards the couch. You both sit there, waiting for one to speak. "Hazel, im sorry, like really sorry. I didn't mean to just leave like that. We should have talked it out properly and and-" You rambled, being cut off by Hazel speaking. "Listen, it's okay. i promise, it was dumb of me to end the relationship when it was healthy and fine. Im in the wrong to Y/N." she answers, putting her hand on your knee. You look up at her already staring at you. you both stare at eachother before you break the silence. "Haze, I-.. I still love you, And its okay if you don't feel the same or youve found another-" You are yet again cut off by Hazel. But this time her lips are on yours. Kissing you softly. She hums as she feels you kissing back with just the same energy. The kis starts to get more quick, as you both kiss eachother with such need. her hands are on your waist as she pulls you up into her lap. You pull away for breath but Hazel stars kissing down your jaw, to your neck, leaving hot, wet kisses. You sigh in pleasure as you move your head to the side, allowing Hazel more space. You hands go into her hair, at one certain suck she makes that leaves a heavy purple mark. "I love you, i hope you know that" Hazel breaths. looking up at you. "I love you more Hazel." You say, as you lean in to kiss her once again.

#hazel callahan #bottoms movie #bottoms 2023 #hazel callahan imagine #hazel bottoms #bottoms hazel #hazel callahan smut #hazel callahan x reader #hazel callahan fluff #bottoms movie 2023 #hazel callahan x you

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navybrat817 · 1 year

Text

A Sunny Outlook

Pairing: Tattoo Artist!Andy Barber x Female Reader Summary: After everything Andy has been through, his outlook on life is a bit jaded. Until you show up. Word Count: Almost 1.3k Warnings: Defending Jacob spoilers/Mix of canon and canon divergent (talk of divorce, child death), slight angst, opposites attract, future smut and feels (it's me), Andy Barber (he's a warning, okay?). A/N: Tenth and final day of my Naughty & Nice Nonsense belongs to new couple, Grumpy and Sunny! Set in the same AU as Hottie and Sugar, I mixed up my list a bit and plan to share Thorn and Rose at a later date. ❤️ Not beta read and written on my phone, so any and all mistakes are my own. Banner and moodboard by yours truly. Andy edit by the beautiful @randomagnes0210. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

If you would’ve told Andy Barber years ago that he’d be living his life today as a tattoo artist, he wouldn’t have believed you. He had his path carved out. Life didn’t care what people wanted though, no matter how hard they worked to get it.

“Um, Mr. Barber?” Jake called out to him from the desk.

"How many times have I told you to call me 'Andy'? For fuck's sake," Andy snapped.

"Sorry, Mr. Bar- Andy!"

Andy took a deep breath in and slowly exhaled. He didn't mean to snap at Jake. He was a good guy. One of the nicest around. It wasn't his fault he was in a bad mood.

Which was his mood most days.

"No, I'm sorry," he said.

He wasn’t always a jaded man. Though his dad had been in jail his entire life, he thankfully had a good childhood overall. It helped set him on his path to become a lawyer, as he wanted to help others. He also made a promise to himself to be a good father if that day would ever come. He thought he had that chance to make that dream a reality with his college sweetheart, Laurie.

As a lawyer, he enjoyed his work. It challenged him and helped him grow. It was also stressful depending on the case. Long hours and seeing some people at their worst didn’t always leave him in the best headspace. But he had his wife and they had their son, Jacob.

Life was good.

Until his world got a little darker.

“This isn’t working, Laurie.”

“No, it isn’t."

Andy couldn’t put his finger on why and he wasn’t sure if it was good or bad that Laurie was on the same page. Love took a lot of work and sometimes it wasn’t enough to make a marriage last. Not that they didn’t give it a try. They met with a counselor. Neither of them stepped out on each other. They wanted desperately to make it work for their kid.

But the loss of their son solidified the end of their marriage.

“Andy, I know you blame me.”

The thing is Andy didn’t put that on her. It was the bad weather that caused her to spin out of control. But she carried guilt for fighting with their son before the crash. It was something she couldn’t let go of.

The divorce was as ammicable as it could be, but it didn’t stop him from feeling like a failure. Work couldn’t distract him either. How was he expected to help people, some who were not even innocent, when he couldn’t help himself?

Tears filled his eyes as he sat in his empty house, trying to figure out what the hell was he supposed to do with his life. He didn’t want to go back into the office. He also didn’t want to drink himself to death. In a drunken stupor he called an old friend of his.

Steve Rogers.

One of the most honorable men Andy had the pleasure of knowing. While he went off to law school, Steve joined the army. The last he heard, he became a tattoo artist with another friend and army buddy, Bucky Barnes. He felt like an ass calling when he hadn’t reached out in so long, but the inebriated part of his brain didn’t process that.

“I don’t know what to do,” was all he said on the voicemail.

He woke up the next morning with a text message from Steve: “You any good at drawing?”

It was the beginning of his new chapter.

"You are never gonna get laid if you keep snapping at everyone," Hal winked as he walked by his chair.

"Get fucked," he said with only a hint of malice as Hal chuckled.

"I'm tryin'!"

"Give him a break," Steve said from his station, but he was smiling, too.

Like Jake, it was hard to get mad at a guy like Hal. A charming piercer who drifted from place to place before he met up with Steve and Bucky, he did some of the best work in the city. He was sure some came into the new shop just to hit on him.

"What is it, Jake?" he asked as he stood up and stretched.

"Your consultation is here about the sun tattoo," he explained, pushing his glasses further up on his nose. "Said she saw some of your work online."

Andy took another breath. He prided himself on the portfolio he built. It took him time to build and he didn't have as much clientele as Steve and Bucky, but he was slowly catching up. He was proud of the work he accomplished.

"Yeah, send her over," he said. He had a few minutes before his next appointment. "Thanks."

Jake rushed off before he could say another word, likely afraid he'd snap again. He'd have to apologize again later. He should've been happy. The opening of the shop went well. He liked his place in the city.

What the hell was his problem?

"Hi!"

Andy blinked when you stood in front of him. He wasn't used to seeing such a cheerful smile on someone’s face. Not directed at him, at least. He would've thought it was fake if not for the kindness in your eyes.

Ironic that you wanted a sun tattoo since he saw the world as much darker a long time ago.

Would the sun still shine in your eyes if I had you spread out under me?

Where the fuck did that thought come from?

He didn't lust after potential clients. He hadn't even done one night stand after Laurie. Why did seeing your happy, beautiful face make him want to change his mind?

Why did your smile get to him?

"Um, I can come back another time," you offered, as if you inconvenienced him by walking over.

The mere presence of you rendered Andy speechless until he remembered he had to speak.

"No, it's okay. Please, have a seat," he stood up to pull a chair over. "I'm Andy."

Your smile was back on your face as you gave him your name.

Beautiful, just like you.

"I just want to say real quick that I love your work,” you said as you took out your phone. “I can’t believe I was lucky enough to get in so quickly.”

"I appreciate that,” he said. The compliment meant a lot. “It’s a sun tattoo you want, right?"

“Yeah. My friends call me Sunny because I’m what they call a ‘big ball of sunshine’,” you explained.

“I can’t imagine why,” he deadpanned. You looked like you were trying to hold in a laugh as you set your phone down. “Something funny?”

“Do people tell you that you’re grumpy?” you asked curiously. "Or is it a requirement that at least half of the staff here have to look intimidating?"

His eyebrows shot up in surprise, but he wasn’t the least bit offended. “People tell me almost every day."

“I can’t imagine why,” you echoed with a smile.

"And if only half of us look intimidating, then we aren't doing our job."

“Don't worry. I won't tell," you mock whispered.

He actually smiled back at you before he frowned and cleared his throat. He refused to let you consume his thoughts, even if your bright aura began to chip away at his tough exterior. “Then why don’t you tell me more about your tattoo.”

He listened intently as you explained the kind of sun design you wanted and where. He had a feeling by the time he finished your consultation, he'd be in a much better mood. Even if he didn’t want to be. And your tattoo would be his best work yet.

Andy's world may be a bit brighter thanks to you. ❤️ Love and thanks for reading! ❤️

Masterlist ⚓ Andy Barber Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

#navybrat writes #navy's naughty & nice nonsense #andy barber x reader #andy barber x female reader #andy barber x you #andy barber x y/n #tattoo artist!andy barber x reader #andy barber #tattoo artist!andy barber #grumpy and sunny #andy barber fanfiction #andy barber imagine #andy barber au #chris evans x reader #chris evans x female reader #chris evans x you #chris evans

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riverlikethelake · 1 year

Text

May the dead walk again

Summary: Your foster fathers, Max and Norm present you with an avatar, an early birthday gift and it feels like the weight of the world has been simultaneously lifted and placed on your shoulders. After running into a Na'vi boy, you're taken to the Omaticaya and given the chance to become one of the people, your friend's older brother being the one to teach you.

Pairing: Neteyam x Avatar!reader

Word count: 7.5k

Warnings/notes: mentions of death, depression, angst, fluff, development of platonic/familial relationships, Spider tries, Protective!Norm, foster family in the lab, the beginning was written when i was sleep deprived, slowburn, slight enemies to lovers, Neteyam and reader are in denial

series master list | Would stardust fix us? Part one.

The Na’vi say that everyone is born twice, it’s a metaphor for young Na’vi going through their iknimaya and earning their place in the clan, but sometimes you wish it was more than that. You pray to Eywa, a god, a mother you’ve never known, and doubt will ever feel, that when you die you will get reborn. Maybe you’re manifesting an early demise, but you cannot bring yourself to care.

You will die, everyone does, your death has just always been by your side, its weight enveloping you in a suffocating embrace, plaguing your life with its entire being.

So, you pray to be reborn, into a body with legs that will carry you across the planet you were born on yet never get to see, with a heart that will beat steady as you run, with lungs that will breathe in the deadly air that you crave to feel blowing on your skin.

You sit in one of the chairs, knees to your chest hunched over as you read one of Grace’s logs. You keep your eyes glued to the screen even as you hear the decompression chamber going off. You hear the chatter of your brother and friends as they enter the lab, you don’t have to turn around to know that the quick footsteps are Kiri running over to see her mother in the Amnio tank.

Large hands rest on your shoulders from behind as Lo’ak leans over to look at the computer you’re reading on. “Watcha reading about this time?” he asks, amusement in his voice. You rest your head against his forearm.

“Razor palm” you answer, you see him tilt his head in confusion out of the corner of your eye. “pxiut” you add. He thinks for a moment before shaking his head “px-iu-t" he drawls, showing you the correct pronunciation.

“pxiut” you state, correctly this time. He grins and pats your shoulder before pulling back and turning to lean on the desk. Spider walks up and glances at your screen, he leans in inspecting the image and shrugs. “My drawing was better” He grins.

You roll your eyes and smile “Oh definitely, the detail you had?” you tease, dramatically doing a ‘chef’s kiss’ motion. Spider playfully smacks the side of your head and backs away, turning to walk to Kiri. You turn your attention back to the screen, reading about the plant.

The world of Pandora always fascinated you, the plants and animals that resided on the planet captured your eye from a young age. You grew up staring out the windows of the biolab into the world beyond, once you learned to read, your birthday gifts were always wider access to all the files they had about pandora, from the process of its discovery to the day-to-day experiments Max runs.

You never stepped foot outside the lab doors though, you barely even stepped outside your room. When you were younger, you’d pester Spider about what he saw, making him describe each plant and animal in detail. He’d oblige you, staying up late telling you stories of his adventures, he even started drawing plants he found. It was the closest you got to the world beyond, your obsession with anything and everything Pandora growing with each moment you could feel the presence of what laid beyond the walls.

Lo’ak watches as you pay full attention to the screen in front of you, completely absorbed in your own world. He taps on the desk to get your attention. “So, the little hideaway is finally out of her room huh?” he teases, your eyes flutter to him before going back to the screen. “Don’t get used to it” you mumble.

He chuckles, “I haven’t seen you in a few weeks, what's new?” he leans forward, keeping his eyes on you. You shrug “Not much, I looked over the test samples Norm collected, nothing you’d be interested in though” you explain, leaning back into the chair as you looked at him.

Lo’ak scrunches his nose “It seems like that’s all you do now” you nod, he huffs “But you don’t even go outside, you’re so obsessed with the world, but you don’t even know what it looks like up close.” You give him a look before turning back to your computer.

You’ve heard him complain about your lack of interest in seeing Pandora many times before, it confused him how your brother couldn’t stay in the forest long enough while you were rarely seen outside of your room. Truthfully, all you wanted was to see the forest, touch the grass and soil like your brother does, climb through trees and hear the sounds of nature. It was something you desperately wanted but never let yourself indulge in, knowing that once you got a taste, nothing would ever be enough, limited by your very being.

But all you tell Lo’ak is you’d much rather research it than see it. He rolls his eyes and pushes off from the desk, you sigh in relief, assuming the barrage is over, but you yelp when Lo’ak grabs the back of the rolly chair and pulls you out and to the middle of the lab, spinning you so that you face Kiri and Spider.

“Sister! You cannot possibly be ok with Y/n living her life like a-… what does dad call it?” He leans over the chair, braids falling in front of you as he faces you upside down “A hermit.” he states. You frown swatting at his braids, beads clicking together as they collide.

“Lo’ak leave her alone” Kiri pushes at his head so he is no longer engulfing you, she places a hand on your shoulder for comfort. Lo’ak frowns “What? You have always been on my side about this”

Kiri rolls her eyes “Yes, and I still am, but this is no longer about Y/n going outside, this is about your pride and ego.” She states, pulling your chair forward, out of his grasp “seeing who can get the other to falter” Kiri was always a firm believer that you needed to see Pandora, but she took a much more careful approach than Lo’ak, telling you about it’s beauty and encouraging you much like a mother coaxing her child into taking their first steps.

You look up to Kiri who’s raising her eyebrows at Lo’ak, you hear Lo’ak grumble before she pulls back, satisfied with her victory. You look past her, making eye contact with Spider, you raise your brows, and he nods. He climbs off the tank Grace stays in and shoos Kiri and Lo’ak away, taking a hold of your chair and rolling you back to your desk.

Your friends weren’t unaware of your condition, but you didn’t like the faces they made when they saw it affect you firsthand, how they’d walk on eggshells around you. So, Spider would always cover you, finding some way to get the attention off you or get you out of the room.

“Just let Y/n do her thing, you’re gonna make her retreat back to her little hideout” he teases lamely, ruffling your hair. You stick your tongue out at him, but smile, placing your hand on his in a way to say thank you.

The past few weeks, whenever you stood up or walked, you’d feel like you were going to faint and would need several minutes to recover and stabilize, hence your lack of presence whenever the Sully kids visited. Of course Spider would brush off their worry and tell this it you were just being moody, wanting to be alone, or getting in a fight. But you could only be gone so long without raising suspicion.

You tune out your friends as they bicker, trying to read the rest of the report but your mind was flooded with thoughts. You glance to the corner of your screen, looking at the time. Norm and Max would be back at any moment, and they will throw a fit if they find you out of your bed.

You think for a minute, weighing your options. Norm wasn’t subtle about his worry for you, nor was he good at hiding your condition from others. If he came back now, there’s no guarantee he’d get the memo to keep Lo’ak and Kiri out of the loop. If you got up now, you’d no doubt cause worry, they’re already suspicious about your disappearance the past few weeks. But, Lo’ak and Kiri don’t actually know much about humans, you could always blame your adverse reaction on dehydration or not eating anything.

You thought for a moment before pushing away from the desk and standing up, you groan as you feel your head swirl, limbs suddenly feeling like jello. Within a second, Spider’s at your side, placing himself under your arm to support you.

You throw your head back groaning, Kiri and Lo’ak are at your side asking questions, running their hands across your arm and forehead. “M’fine, just dehydrated” you mumble as Spider starts to lead you away.

Kiri starts to fuss at you about taking care of yourself when you hear the decompression door opening. Before you can react, you hear Norm calling out your name. You groan at the loud noise, a lump forming in your throat. There goes your plan.

Norm and Max rush over, Spider transfers you to them, Norm fully picking you up in his arms. “What are you doing outside of your room? You know how unstable you are right now” He fusses. You groan “M’fine Norm” Your head is throbbing, your eyes screw shut and your tongue feels heavy and numb in your mouth.

“What do you mean unstable?” Lo’ak presses, stepping forward to inspect you. You open your eyes, frowning. “I’m fine Lo’ak, they’re just being dramatic” you swat at him, shaking your head.

“Y/n you look like you’re going to pass out, I don’t think you’re fine” he retorts, raising his brows. You look to Max hoping he’d help your case, but he just shrugs “You need rest Y/n” he explains. You roll your eyes and shake your head, pushing at Norm’s chest to be let down.

“I can take care of myself” you state, embarrassed at the commotion your foster fathers were making. Norm grunts and starts walking out of the room, ignoring the questions your friends keep asking. He makes it to the back of the building before you notice everyone following you, Spider catching up and telling Max something you can’t make out.

Before you know it, you’re being laid down on your bed and Max is making quick work of the medication and equipment kept by your bed. You sit up as Max wraps a blood pressure monitor around your arm, huffing as Norm places a hand on your forehead. He points Spider to the pack of water bottles they keep by your nightstand; he grabs one and hands it to Norm who quickly opens it and presses it to your lips.

“Ok ok that’s enough” you announce, leaning back away from the bottle. “I know you think I'm helpless but I'm not, I'm almost 18, not a baby” you state, glaring at the scientist. “Well Y/n when you can’t even stay in bed long enough to recover, what else are we supposed to do?” He retorts.

Your furrow your brows, rolling your eyes “I’ve been cooped up back here my entire life, I think one day outside of the room I haven’t left in three weeks is fine” you mumble, looking to Kiri and Lo’ak who are peeking in through your door. Norm follows your gaze, his expression softening when he lands on the Sully kids. He looks back to you as you avert your gaze, pursing your lips.

Sighing, he turns and walks towards the Na’vi kids. “Y/n is fine, she got sick a few weeks ago and we didn’t know what it was so it was a hard recovery” he explains “But we have a better handle on it now, she just needs some water and rest and she’ll be ok” he watches as they glance to each other, worry spread across their face.

They look to you before retreating, murmuring to each other. You bring your knees to your chest, burying your face into your arms. Spider crawls over you, sitting on your side, wrapping an arm around you.

You take deep breaths, pinching your eyes shut. After a moment Max takes the monitor off you and his hand takes its place. “Get some rest Bug, it’s the fastest way to recover” he squeezes your arm before standing up, he places a quick kiss on the top of your head and walks out.

Norm watches you for a second and sighs, ruffling your hair and walking out, closing the door behind him. You don’t lift your head even after they leave, so Spider rests his head on your shoulder.

Even as a kid you felt uneasy about others knowing your condition, there was no way to completely hide it so you settled with avoiding the topic all together. You were sick, yeah, but that doesn’t mean you’re gonna die if they breathe on you too hard or say something too loud. Hell, not even Spider knows the full extent to your condition. It already controlled every aspect of your life, the least you wanted was to have some sense of a normal social life.

After a moment you turn your head just enough to peak your eyes out to see Spider, he notices and makes eye contact, a soft expression passing over his face. “What did you see?” you mumble, barely audible. He chuckles, leaning back against your headrest.

“Well Lo’ak decided to ride a Pa’li, it was the first time i saw their resting place and there were so many pitcher plants, Pa’liwll Kiri says” he explains, quietly you repeat the name, running through the catalogs in your head for a visual. “Oh and we saw an ‘angtsik from above…” he continues, describing what seemed to be a once in a lifetime adventure for you when for him, it was every other day.

You listen as he laughs and gets sidetracked, making jabs at Lo’ak’s ability to ride a direhorse or shoot an arrow. You finally lifted your head to laugh when he told you about Tuk cursing in front of Neytiri, courtesy of Lo’ak not being able to keep his mouth shut. Spider took the chance to pinch your cheek, earning a slap on the hand.

“Oh and Neteyam was pissed at Lo’ak when he saw a scar on Tuk’s cheek” Your ears perk at the name, curious about the boy you rarely heard about. You had never met Neteyam, he had never come to the lab.

He was older than you but younger than Spider, and you had only ever heard offhand comments about him. Neteyam, the next Olo’eyktan and the golden child that outshined Lo’ak, the perfect soldier and a mighty warrior. He’s everything the first son of Toruk Makto should be, born with his life laid out before him.

You saw Lo’ak’s envy of him, how he slowly lost his desire to be like his brother, evident in the change from admiration to resentment when he spoke of him throughout the years.

You were once desperate to meet the brother your friends often spoke of, but as years passed and his presence stayed a ghost, you resigned yourself to only knowing him through word of mouth. When you were young, Lo’ak and Spider would talk about how cool he was, how fun and great he was with a bow.

Now, all you hear is how busy he is, how he just does his father's bidding and has abandoned spending time with his siblings for training. You take their word for it, how could you not? You’ve never met the boy and you can see the toll their strained relationship with their brother has taken on Kiri and Lo’ak.

But there's two sides to every story, you know that all too well.

“What does he look like?” the words slip out before you can have a second thought. Your voice is barely above a whisper, you hope that your foster brother didn’t hear you, but it’s crushed when you hear him hum.

“He looks like Lo’ak, but more like his mom. Ummm yknow yellow eyes and his hair is braided back, so it doesn’t hang down in his face like Lo’ak and Kiri.” He looks up to the ceiling, trying to recall the boy’s appearance as best he could considering it’s not something he actively takes note of. “he’s pretty tall, but then again all Na’vi are compared to us” he chuckles, nudging your side.

“Oh, and Lo’ak looks a little more human than him, his nose is flatter, and he has three fingers” he states, leaning against you. “uuuum yeah, he’s really stoic though, he doesn’t talk much and when he does, he’s so serious”

It makes sense, you think, being the Olo’eyktans first son and having a brother like Lo’ak, it wouldn’t be easy to be laid back. You tilt your head at the weak description your brother provides, he was never a great storyteller, even with years of experience, recounting every detail of his day by your bedside at night.

His words are interrupted by a yawn that escapes from his mouth, he continues on with his sentence, but you pat his shoulder, his words trail off. “It’s late Spider, you should get to bed” you whisper, a reassuring smile gracing your lips.

He searches your eyes for a moment, you haven’t had much time together lately and he always feels guilty about leaving you alone in the lab for too long. After a moment he nods, placing a chaste kiss on your forehead before leaping up and out of the room.

It’s been hours since the lab went quiet, the Sully kids long gone and your foster family asleep. Your eyes twitch, the lack of sleep weighing them down. You stare out the window, moonlight shining on your face.

For all your life you stared out this window, the shining stars burning into your skin.

You’ve memorized the stars, the patterns and the order, years of searing each star into your mind. You read about constellations when you were young, the ones visible from earth, it amazed you, the stories behind just a star. Every night you’d search the sky in hopes of finding a constellation, you found ones that were close but just not right. It upset you, you knew the story of Orion and Delphius like the back of your hand, you had drawn, and memorized Hercules and Perseus a thousand times so why could you not find them?

It all came a head one night when you tried to leave the lab, convinced that the glass of your window and the limited view were the source of your inability to draw the lines in the stars above you. Max caught you as you were trying to reach for the handle to the decompression chamber, oxygen mask thrown on flimsily and still in your pjs.

You whined about wanting to see the stars, insisting that the window was distorting them somehow, it took some prying, but he made the connection that you wanted to see constellations. You were upset to find out that those constellations aren’t visible from Pandora, but you were content, curious about what the skies of Pandora did hold.

You started to make your own, disfigured shapes and hours mapping out the stars. Each one was a story, a life you created, a life you wanted. Norm and Max knew of your hobby, even wanting to hear the stories you came up with, but you refused.

It was too personal.

It was something for you and just you.

You rest your head against the cold glass, eyes straining to the sky, avoiding the jungle that lay beyond the clearing.

You hear the footsteps, the way he hesitates to intrude before opening the door.

“Y/n...” His voice is modulated, quiet and clear. You don’t turn to look at him, keeping your eyes on the dots littering the sky.

Carefully, he walks over, sitting on the edge of your bed, placing a hand on your shoulder. “I was going to wait till morning to tell you but since you’re still up...” You move your eyes, looking at your foster father without making an effort to move your body, as if you’d crumble and break at any movement.

He holds your gaze, unsure of where you are.

“I’d like to show you something” He states, coaxing you out of your trance. Max stands in your doorway, making his presence known when Norm’s advances seemed to make no progress. You look down, fiddling with your fingers before leaning to Norm.

He takes your hand and helps you up. “It’s a surprise” Max quips in a sing song way as Norm places his hand over your eyes. Internally, you roll your eyes, your lips curling into a smile as you chuckle. You let the two lead you out of your room, you try to make sense of where you’re going but you get lost at just a few turns in.

You want to scold the two men, accuse them of purposely going slow when they come to a sudden stop.

you keep your eyes closed for a second, even after Norm takes his hands away from your face. “It’s a little early” Max breaks the silence “but we thought you’d like to put it to use sooner rather than later” Your confusion from his words quickly disappears as you open your eyes, your sight landing on an amnio tank.

You gasp as you take in the sight. An avatar floats in the tank, jerking and fidgeting. The face on the avatar was you. Your body, your face, molded into that of a Na’vi. You try to speak but your tongue falls short, mind racing and tripping over words.

“Happy early 18th birthday” they say in unison, amused by your shock.

“How” is all you manage to get out. A soft chuckle leaves the two men's lips. “Well, it took a long time, our tech isn’t as good as it was before the RDA left” Norm explained, patting you on the back.

“But we managed, your indifference to anything but your computer helped keep it a secret” Max added, chuckling.

Slowly you creep towards the tank, eyebrows furrowing as you take in the figure. It was surreal to see yourself like… that.

It’s you but it’s not, it’s a mindless avatar that you can take over, it will be you. You tilt your head as you circle the tank, taking in every last detail of the avatar. Max and Norm watch you patiently, expectant of the shock you’re feeling.

“Why?” You look up to them, you hand resting on the cool tank. They both walk over, Max standing on the other side of the tank, looking down at the avatar. “Well, you’ve been obsessed with Pandora practically your whole life” he says.

Norm stands next to you, placing a hand on your shoulder. “We also know how late you and Spider would stay up so he could tell you about the jungle and the Omaticaya” Max continues, Norm squeezing your shoulder.

“We’ll get it ready tonight and tomorrow you can take it for a test drive huh?” Norms voice barely cuts through the tension in your head. You didn’t know what to say, yes or no?

You’ve stared out your window your entire life, craving Pandora, reading and watching old logs over and over again to get a glimpse of what it might feel like. Now you’re presented with the opportunity, and you can’t bring yourself to say yes.

You don’t trust yourself to not give up everything for the world that lies beyond the walls of your home.

“I’m not 18 yet” you blurt out, coming up with any reason to refuse the gift. “Close enough” Norm shrugs. Max sends you a short smile “We’re sorry about freaking out earlier, you’ve been doing everything we said to recover, and it wasn’t fair to blow up on you like that”

You stare at him silently, hands itching. God, you have everything you’ve ever wanted right here at your fingertips, you’ve been obedient your entire life, content with what you have.

But now you have the chance to live.

Before Max can even finish his sentence, you’re throwing on the old avatar clothes they dug out and bounding out the door. The examination was grueling, the excitement and anxiety about to burst out your veins.

You feel the sun on your skin, and you close your eyes, basking in the light. Your breath hitches as you feel a cool breeze graze your skin. Fresh air fills your lungs, crisp and energizing.

“Now Y/n be care-“ Norm starts to warn you, but without a second thought you’re running through the field, jumping over railing and fallen logs. You can’t help the exhilaration that pumps through your blood, purging your mind of any previous anxiety or hesitation.

As you land you stumble, tripping over yourself. your heals dig into the ground and you throw your arms out to balance yourself, a second tics by and a laugh escapes your lips. You throw your head up and stare into the sky. Your lips hurt from how hard you’re smiling.

You look down at your feet digging into the ground, wiggling your toes into the soil. You whip your head around, smiling widely at Norm watching you from the door. You’re outside. Actually outside. Within seconds you're laughing, spinning around in an attempt to take in everything at once.

It was the same field and forest you had watched everyday, but it’s so different up close, so real. It doesn't take long for you to grow dizzy and fall flat on your butt, tripping over your own feet and loosing balance. It’s without a doubt embarrassing, later you’ll thank Eywa that only Norm and Max were watching you, but you can’t bring yourself to care as your sink your fingers into the ground below you, threading your fingers through thin patches of grass.

You bite your lip, giggling like a child with a lollipop as your swipe your hand across the ground, committing the course feeling of the dried up dirt to memory, how it sticks to your palms and how the path your hand took bears a faint mark.

You cant imagine how stupid you look to Norm as he walks up to you, you’re literally playing in dirt, but the look on both your faces show no proof that either of you care. He ruffles your hair, reminding you of how messy and unkept it is, before he hands you a choker-mic and earpiece. “It’s just the first day so I don’t want you going far, you know how badly that could have gone for Jake” his comment draws a giggle from you, knowing the story of the great Toruk Makto from the perspective of the science guys by heart.

“Check in every hour and keep an eye on your surroundings” He drones on with the safety speech he drilled into Spider as a kid, you listened but your attention is taken by the forest that lies just meters ahead of you, the edge just a glimpse of the world beyond.

It’s captivating, every movement and sound draws your attention. It’s so much bigger than you ever could have imagined, the towering trees pushing a subtle sense of dread in your stomach. You could get lost, lose track of time, fall in love, so easily.

You’re hypnotized by the sway of the leaves, the quiet movements and way the air shifts.

Can you do this?

You’re pulled out of your trance when he nudges your shoulder, you blink hard and look to him. “Were you even-? Whatever” he sighs “Just please don’t-” he hands you a knife “Don’t die, you’ll come back to your real body and it wont hurt you but it’s not a fun experience…” you take the knife, observing it.

It’s a common hunting knife, the netting wrapped around the handle is worn, basic weaving patterns. You look up to him, tilting your head. He smiles and nods to the forest “Be safe kid, I want you home before eclipse.”

You push yourself up and you take a moment to take in your sudden height difference. A smirk slips onto your lips and he rolls his eyes, biting your lip you turn to the forest. anxiously, you step forward, one foot in front of the other.

Before you can think, your feet are speeding up, pushing you forward into the jungle you stared at for 17 years. You break through the edge and you’re surrounded by trees and green, the forest envelopes you, the earthy smell sinking into your skin.

You slow down once you’re several meters past the edge, taking in everything around you. The leaves far above you sway in the wind, tiny critters crawl around on the trees and fallen over logs. The sound hypnotizes you, each noise and bustle piercing your ears. The forest envelopes you, every part of your being melting into the air, begging to become one.

You’re smiling so hard, your lips feel like they’re going to split, the ache in your cheeks forgotten before you can even bring yourself to notice.

You’re in the forest.

You take a moment to breathe in the air, the damp smell of wood and moss, soil and plants sprawling across the floor and trees. Vines wrap around branches, hanging down, some of the flowers move as if they were breathing, the sway of the grass in sync. Chirps and clicks echo, your head swiveling trying to find the source.

Your legs are moving unconsciously, your body in a trance. The feel of the ground beneath you is entrancing, the tickle of the grass on the bottoms of your feet, its disorienting how soft the soil is compared to the hard floors of your home. Except it didn’t feel like home anymore, it never did, this is what feels right.

The smoothness of the giant leaves you run your hand over, the flowers sprouting from vines and plants, leaves of plants grazing your legs, it all leaves you breathless. Names run through your head as you observe the plants, their names popping into your head, the properties and uses. Its surreal to see them up close, in real life.

I should take samples... You think to yourself but pack the idea to the back of your mind, another day perhaps.

The forest is enchanting, taking all of your attention, you forget Norm’s advice and just wander through the green aimlessly. You don’t even realize how far you’ve gone, how long it’s been, the pair of eyes that's been trailing you for at least a mile.

Neteyam doesn't understand you… you’re na’vi but wearing human clothes? Obviously, you must be an Avatar, but he’s met all the Avatar’s left on Pandora during the meeting with his father, and you’re careless, like a toddler who just learned to walk. Uncaring of where you are, where you’re going, clueless of your surroundings.

He considered you could be a Skyperson, the ones who returned, but his father and the scientists doubted that the RDA would fund an Avatar program after their last mission. You’re also defenseless, wearing old clothes and no gun, no soldier, no sign that you’re here maliciously. You’re not a threat. He still keeps his bow ready despite his certainty that you’re harmless, in case you make an unsavory move or a different threat makes an appearance.

He tilts his head as he watches you, you’re smiling and immersing yourself in the forest. The way you take it all in reminds him of his sister, but this is different. His sister has a natural connection, the forest being her home, you’re engulfed by it, if he hadn’t been keeping such an intent eye on you then you would have disappeared right before him.

Something about the way you walked, the delicate placing of your feet, the careful posture you kept to be able to turn and see all of the forest at any moment, he couldn’t just let you wander off. It’s his job as future Olo’eyktan to be vigilant and mindful, your presence, even innocuous, wasn’t something that could be acquitted.

So he followed you, tilting his ears to make sense of your whispers to yourself. He knows English, his entire family is fluent in it, but he still frowns when he recognizes you’re speaking it. He and his siblings will use it occasionally, but he often avoids it due to the distaste he feels about it, the association it has with skypeople leaving a bad taste in his mouth.

He doesn’t contemn skypeople as much as his mother or other members of the clan, but he never goes out of his way to speak or associate with them.

With a soft giggle, his entire attention locks onto your face. Your hand comes up to rest your fingers In front of your mouth as you smile at the bugs fluttering around a twirling plant after you tapped it.

Yeah… like a toddler…

He purses his lips to hold back the sigh that tries to escape his lips, how much longer must he watch you? The decision it up to him but he doesn’t know how to approach the situation.

He tilts his head, shifting his weight on his feet. He’s about to leave, deciding you’re not going to cause a problem, when an atokirina’ floats in front of his. It bobs through the air, seemingly aimlessly, before slowly descending towards you. His eyes follow it intently heeding Eywa’s mind.

The spirit drifts around you, catching your attention once it bobs around your head. You can’t help the smile that tugs at your lips when you notice the spirit, you take your hand off the tree it was resting on and cup it with your other, biting your lip as the atokirina’ floats down into the cusp of your hands.

It tickles at your palm and fingertips, your smile grows wider, such a being coming to you and making contact brings you endless joy, even if you don’t know the full significance of it. Slowly you bend down to rest on your knees, keeping a slow pace to avoid disturbing the being. Once you're sat, you shift to rest on the side of your thigh, humming as you bring the spirit closer and observe it.

He watches you for a moment, considering you before shifting to get down from his hiding spot. You gasp when he drops down from a branch from a tree opposite of you, you had the sense that you weren’t alone, but you attributed that to the bustling forest.

Your eyes are locked onto the Na’vi boy several feet infront of you, mouth agape and body frozen. There’s a heavy silence between you, observing eachother, unsure of what to say. You decide to say something, he hasn’t killed you yet so thats a good sign, but he beats you too it.

“Who are you.” He states, hs voice gruff and thick. You open your mouth, words jumbled in your throat before you blurt out “Y/n” his eyes are biting, pinning you to your spot.

He doesn’t say anything, observing every part of you. “I’m from the labs, um with the science guys” you offer, he tilts his head, furrowing his brows. You panic, realizing that you could very well be taken as a RDA sky person “The ones who fought with you, loyal to the Na’vi” you add abruptly, hoping to withdraw any possible suspicions or misgivings.

His expression remains unchanging, it makes you nervous, unsure of what to do or say. Before you can try and add anything, “Come” is all he says, nodding his head in the direction he turns to walk in. Realizing the woodsprite is long gone, having floated away during the interaction, you scramble up to follow him.

He’s quick, knowing of where to go, experienced in the trek of the forest. You clamber after him, trying to keep up with his pace while avoiding any obstacles. Your efforts are unsuccessful, your foot tripping over a vine like branch that caught on your foot.

You hiss at the sting of your palms that caught you, pushing yourself up on your elbows. You start to get up when the boy is in front of you, grabbing your hands and inspecting them. His expression is unreadable, but the way his eyes soften when he sees the minimal damage done to you makes a smile pull at your lips.

He looks up to you, repositioning his hands to be holding onto your wrists, he stands up, pulling you up with him. “Must i carry you?” He asks lamely, annoyed at your unwieldy coordination. Quickly you shake your head, heat rising to your cheeks from embarrassment. He nods and turns to continue his path, his hand loosely holding onto your wrist as you both continue foreward.

You don’t know how long you walk for, letting the boys hold on you guide you as you study the forest you pass by. Before you know it, his pace is slowing and you peak over his figure to see the village. A pit grows in your stomach, you fiddle with your hands, wringing your fingers as you walk through the village, eyes following your every movement.

You really don’t want to be here, no doubt much farther than what Norm and Max would have approved, but there wasn’t much you could do. You didn’t want to protest or run, overly aware of how easily the boy could overpower and kill you, but there was also the curiousity of the forest guiding you.

The Na’vi know the forest better than you ever could, you’d no doubt be safer with a stranger than on your own, it’s a chance to see and explore the forest without worry of getting lost or running into danger. And now being in the village? It’s unexpected, but you can’t deny the ecitment that swirls with the anxiety in your chest.

He walks up to a particular tent, you notice its larger than the others, not by much though. Na’vi start to surround you, curious about you and the boy, the whispers and eyes on you causing you to bite your lip nervously. The boy calls out to the tent, after a moment the flaps open and out walks a tall man adorned in intricate jewelry spreading across his shoulders and chest, a tall woman and an older woman stalking out after him.

Their eyes fall on the boy, then you, the woman’s eyes narrow, tilting her chin up. The man just seems confused, looking to the boy for an explanation. They start speaking in the language, you understand some of it, but you’re not fluent. You pick up “Eywa’s sign” “Harmless” “daughter of the sky men” ect. You can interpret what they’re talking about, but you can’t understand specifically what is being said.

The woman narrows her eyes, studying you. You resist squirming under her gaze until the man turns to you and speaks “So, you’re Y/n, Spider’s sister, right?” his English is clean, almost as if you were talking to one of the guys in the biolab and you mind makes the connection.

This is Jake Sully

Your eyes widen at the realization, but you keep yourself composed. Carefully you nod “Yes sir, they gave me this Avatar as an early birthday gift and I decided to look around the forest” you explain, you bite the inside of your cheek “I’ve never seen it before” you whisper weakly, averting your gaze to the floor.

The woman, who you assume is Neytiri circles you, surveying your appearance and self. She stops next to you, brushing her fingertips against your loose hair. “You have never been outside of that tawtute vessel?” she muses, curiously watching your facial response.

Your eyes dart to her, biting your lip you start to nod but the attention is drawn away when a familiar voice calls out. “Y/n?!” to your side, Spider, Lo’ak, and Kiri stand startled. Spider’s mouth twists into a grin before stepping foreward, he looks you up and down “So it was viable huh?” he asks amused, you tilt your head in confusion, you're about to say something before he continues “and they gave it to you early? And they didn’t even tell me” He feigns hurt, his amusement growing by the second.

“Wait Spider you knew about this?” Lo’ak asks, stepping foreword and grabbing him by the shoulder, pointing at you. Your brother shrugs, explaining that it was an idea they told him about a few years ago but never confirmed. Kiri steps foreword, a smile growing on her lips.

Her hands graze your cheeks as she observes every part of your face and body “This is amazing Y/n!” her eyes lock with yours “this is amazing” her smile bleeds into yours, a shy grin forming as she takes your hands in hers and laughs.

“Yeah now you can actually hang out with us” Lo’ak roughly places his hand on your head, the height difference not as drastic as before but still there. You shyly tilt your head, biting your lip at the excitement of your friends and brother.

The buzz seems to die when their eyes are drawn to the figure that steps closer behind you, out of your peripheral you see the older woman, the Tsahik, stare at them, communicating through their eyes before they take their hands off you and back up a few steps. A lump forms in your throat as you turn to fully face the towering woman. Her gaze is unwavering, strong, it makes you want to say something, anything.

“What is your purpose, girl?” She questions, the weight of her words pulling down on your every limb. What does she mean? It’s such an intense yet vague question, her firm expression not giving any help to your attempts to decipher what’s the right thing to say.

To live.

You’re out of the lab, face to face with someone other than a person you’ve known literally your entire life. You’re not confined to those walls anymore, you can breathe the air, walk and run without concern, see and live among what you’ve been learning about your entire life, yearning for it.

It wasn’t your intention when you stepped into the forest, and you’re sure it was Max and Norms either, but the opportunity is right in front of you. This is your choice, completely and entirely your choice.

“To learn the ways of the forest” you say carefully “the ways of the people” you bite your lip as she slowly looks you up and down. She finally meets your eyes and you straighten your back, keeping her gaze locked with yours. You can’t explain the relief that washes over your chest when her eyes twitch, the slightest softness creeping into her expression.

She glances to the boy then to Jake and Neytiri, again silently communicating with their eyes. After a moment she turns back to you. “I trust my grandson’s judgement” She states, your mind goes blank for a moment before she continues “both my grandchildren and the Great Mother see something in you, it would be foolish to reject you.” She turns to Jake and Neytiri again, looking to the people surrounding you all now.

“She will be taught the ways of the people” She announces firmly, she locks eyes with Jake, then glances down to the boy who brought you here. Jake breathes in before stepping forward, placing a hand on the boys shoulder. “My son is to be Olo’eyktan, he must be able to lead and help the people” He looks to the boy, his son “It will be his job to guide her, a great way to gain experience and prove himself”

Whispers move through the crowd, the way the boys lips purse makes your tail flick against your ankles unconsciously. You lock eyes with him, you want to curl into yourself at the way he looks at you. The intensity of his gaze hitches at your breath, reviving the weight pulling the strings of anxiety in your chest. You feel a pair of hands on your shoulders and a voice speaks right next to your ears.

“You and Neteyam stuck together huh?” Lo’aks voice is riddled with amusement “This ought to be good” he cackles, your brother nudging your arm as he makes similar comments.

The boy stands in front of you, eyes fixed on you, you swear you see the hardness of his gaze waver.

Neteyam… he’s more than you ever thought he would be

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