#you're trying to sound intellectual when really you just don't want to let people enjoy things

[quietbluejay]

Fulgrim 8

the finale

so the traitor forces prepared the area in a shocking display of actual competence

Horus stroked the large dark moustache he had somehow grown overnight and cackled evilly as he put on his black spiky helmet

ah this book never fails to crack me up

oh actual numbers

there's been a full page that's basically just been this also ferrus brought a sword he's not using, it's a surprise tool to help us later and i'm pretty sure i know what it is i mean it would be a legitimate twist if it wasn't the friendship sword

so approx 2:1 at this point

blorbo alert you know i think this is mcneill's worst written battle scene shame!

ah little horus that short story with him was kind of funny all the rest of the traitors have to avoid the EC space b/c of friendly fire

yeah who could possibly see where this was going ferrus manus is not a military intellectual, to put it mildly

um

like i know entrenchment gives the defending force an advantage, but literally having it be even at 2:1 julius POV he's feeling pretty today unfortunately for everyone else

many such cases ah Santar has shown up Santar has a reaction to seeing the EC that is very similar to my reaction to this novel i- ok i guess??? modern problems require modern solutions??? santar is winning and about to strike the killing blow and then he bluescreens because julius is shall we say, enjoying this a bit too much which gives julius the chance to glaive him described as being extremely painful welp rip santar so everything is currently on a knife's edge and now everyone else is here lmao ah Ferrus POV is this going to be the final duel

the friendship sword: cosmic justice so ferrus is deliberately trying to duel fulgrim "the viperous primarch" ha ha

PFFFF

okay so the combined new traitor forces are roughly equal to the loyalist forces so another 40k squints waitasecond i see what you did there horus truly was the warhammer 40k

Ferrus has spotted Fulgrim

he just...lmao

lmao corvus tells him to cool his jets which was an actual phrase someone used in this book! (not here) corvus and vulkan want to regroup and take a breather and let the reinforcements take over for now

so like, why didn't this guy fall to Khorne again i am again thinking about foiling angron and ferrus

yes this man was in the running for warmaster wheeze

man i don't even know i wouldn't trust this man to run a lemonade stand

i can't take any of this seriously with this tortured dialogue girl help

betrayal time

though given the slaughter that's been described where hundred and hundreds keep dying there really shouldn't be that many "hundreds and hundreds" left to get slaughtered

ok duel time ferrus and fulgrim end up wounding each other and both fall to their knees i guess at the same time and fulgrim comes back to himself the sword kinda controls him to get back into the fight the moment kind of gets ruined when it talks about the crackling lightning all over his body getting handsy

he's swinging the blade "of his own volition" in one sentence and then in the next he's desperately trying to stop it ok i guess primarchs are like immortals from highlander

Fulgrim throws his hands in the air and dramatically screams "what have i done!!!" laer blade: hehehehe

have we forgotten how ferrus just turned on a dime towards killing as soon as fulgrim suggested betraying the emperor

i mean they were very much rash actions i get where you're coming from but they were very much that

hey, let's go back to that scene bluejay remembers even if you don't

fulgrim then in despair tries to kill himself but the sword tells him not to sword: i can give you oblivion sword: just let me in the driver's seat fulgrim: sounds good i get that this is an emotional moment and he's not thinking clearly at all but really fulgrim 2 seconds later: oops

actually no, i think it's a generally accepted fact that you don't want to trap people in a situation where they have nothing to lose because they will tend to fight back like cornered rats then we get big picture view of the battle tldr most of the loyalists are dying, the EC continue to be the way they are, Corvus got badly wounded but gets spirited off okay battle's over time for the speeches

evil lamp horus is being an evil lamp a bit more literally than usual

oh horus pov Fulgrim brought him a present it's Ferrus' head Horus internally: …this is a bit far Fulgrim tosses the head on the floor Horus: why am i getting daemon vibes Horus: Fulgrim… "Fulgrim": I'm sorry, the real Fulgrim has left the building

the emojis available to me cannot adequately express how i am feeling at this moment "Fulgrim": having a body is pretty cool I'm going to have to try making some modifications to this one Horus internally: this is incredibly wrong and creepy

Horus: where's the real Fulgrim "Fulgrim": time for backstory

lmao Horus: okay but that doesn't answer my question "Fulgrim": he's trapped inside his body with me~

wow hey i thought horus was supposed to genuinely care about fulgrim he makes a private vow to try and free fulgrim but like

the part I'm going e_e at is Horus putting "having the third legion onside" as the highest priority epsecially because if they find out, and they find out he knew…lmao i what???? fulgrim killed ostian with the anathame??? okay anyways blah blah daemon is enjoying things fulgrim trapped in the painting the end IM FREE im gonna do the afterword

im going to cry or something

bro???

anyways im done im out

in some ways it was better done than False Gods or A Thousand Sons i guess

it wasn't as bad an experience as i thought it would be at least but also i've learned to laugh more at this stuff by this point

okay some positive things about it i do appreciate that it played everything for horror rather than sexiness and also the emphasis on just how gross it was rather than being titillating like a lot of authors would have gone in that directions

I'm gonna leave this one on a bible quote

1 Corinthians 10:23 "All things are lawful," but not all things are helpful. "All things are lawful," but not all things build up.

and finally

[shmowder]

Two dollars?? Whoa. I'll keep an eye out for a sale. Based on screenshots, it seems like P1 has more dialogue and more opportunities to get to know the characters better? I love the P2 art style so much though so it might be hard to get used to the original. I know some people have the opposite problem and are unhappy with some of the redesigns.

We like the same aspects of yandere <3 Oh I need to rant for a second. There's nothing wrong with legitimately enjoying the violence and kidnapping aspects, but I do feel like there's sometimes too much emphasis on making sure readers don't think you're (general "you") romanticizing yanderes. Like intellectually I know it's unhealthy you don't have to tell me every other sentence that this is wrong and bad and that the reader insert isn't supposed to like it! 🤧 ... Ngl I love willing!reader 🫣🫣 Anyway. Rant over :)

I'll never get over actually being asked for my thoughts?? Thank you, even though I often feel out of my depth lmao. Please tell me about yandere Aspity!

In addition to what you said, I think Maria would be prone to jealousy too but unlike Katerina, would feel more of a sense of entitlement and is more prone to lashing out at others and at you occasionally. Katerina is more likely to internalize perceived rejection and be self-destructive about it. They'd both want to dress you up and do your makeup (even if you don't normally wear any) like a doll >:)

Lara and Peter might be the clingy/obsessive type, would latch on to the idea of you as a lifeline to pull them out of their despair. Lara would try to prove herself to you through acts of service; you'd be the inspiration for Peter's art and he'd give you little gifts all the time.

Victor would be overprotective, treating you like glass and like you've said before, wanting you to feel you can come to him, only, with your troubles. Would also randomly ignore you occasionally lol :( He can't help it he's too lost in thought! Big Vlad would spoil the ever loving fuck out of you *and* intimidate everyone else away.

Btw. I read your Andrey x reader hcs last night and they were really good! I don't really feel anything for this guy but it seems like you've got his personality just right :) I've never wanted piercings in my life, why is that part speaking to me 😭 (ok, that's a lie, I did want snakebites when I was seventeen :o)) I liked the little bit about sketching diagrams afterwards, too. Your smut is so good forreal

🐿️ anon

Delicious juicy food delivered straight to my inbox for FREE? I am in heaven and ascending even higher rn.

I want to let you know that this concept lived in my head rent-free for the past week. Each time I came to answer this ask, I'd get distracted by the brief yandere drabbles you wrote and get lost in the fantasy. Especially the overprotective Victor one, it's my favourite. Oh god, you're a genius. Tell me more I beg!

And yes P1 had a lot more dialogue which is nice because it explains the story a lot more. Especially characters like Aglaya who get a lot of backstory and other things revealed about them. It's a game that does the best it could with the very very limited technology it had at the time, and despite the graphics it's beautiful in some areas.

The music is its crowning gem however! P1 soundtrack literally blows P2 soundtrack out of the water. It's like the devs know the graphic and everything is lacking in P1 so they more than made up for it with fire music that gets you in a trance of how amazing it sounds.

I think the major flaws are how the charactersation and story is slightly different. Some characters like Victor and Aglaya remain the same but other characters like Alexander Saburov are massively different. Also as a majority everyone is more of an asshole in P1, especially Artemy and Daniil at times.

Eva and Andrey are more slutty... do with that what you will.

Yulia in P1 feels like a younger Yulia who's still lost and figuring out life. Like a freshly out of college Yulia. While in P2 she's more of a jaded full grown up who knows how the world works but is displeased by it. I love both versions <3 She is one of the very polite characters in P1... which are surprisingly sparce. P1 is also more funny and silly with the dialogue, it's more whimsical with more realistic options too. Also you get a lot of opportunities to break the 4th wall while in P2 you can only do it while talking with the rat prophet, the replacement Artemy and endgame Mark.

And I agree with you about the yandere thoughts. The horror ones are fun but sometimes I want romanticised obsession and devotion yk? Like a yandere ready to move the earth and bring down the moon for their beloved. Where the conflict is more focused on the emotions and intenal turmoil rather than the murder or horror aspect. Even when it comes to the reader, I enjoy a little toxic reader too 👀 Like someone who encourages their yandere behaviour or doesn't mind it, someone who is okay with the obsession or someone who actively goes out of their way to make it worse. A reader who's a full fledged character rather than a damsel in distress, someone who takes actions and can effect the world around them.

But don't get me wrong! I do like a damsel in distress... as a kink. It's kinda hot to be a useless fawned upon princess that everyone is looking to save and please.

Yeah, I feel you so much on the "Don't have to tell me this is wrong every sentence." Like, oh my god, dude! I hate when stories treat the reader like they're an idiot. You have to have faith in them, especially when your content is marked for adults that they will be able to read between the lines. Like you don't see murder or serial killer stories saying how this is wrong every sentence?? Yandere is just a mix of horror, romance, and smut! It's just an archetype with interesting concepts and maybe even a fetish.

Why do people have to psychoanalyse every kink someone has??

I'll get back to the other characters in a bit, let's focus on the overprotective Victor for example! bc the brainrot is real i legit haven't stopped thinking about him for one second.

In one of his dialogue trees he has this line:

5.Victor Kain: ...If I'd learned about this earlier, I would have torn his head off already. Now give me thirty-five seconds of silence, please. I need to think.

It's when you inform him about the chemist who's helping people hide their dead. The same one who buys body parts from Artemy, he apparently also works for tha kains but manages to hide his shady businesses right under their nose.

And his reaction is just odjwofjwofkwk So Delicious? Like that chemist posed a real threat to tramble down on the fragile castle the Kain built with their reputation, start a domino effect which exposes them as law breakers for the townfolks which they absolutely cannot have.

You see him angry, even if it's just a small glimpse. He could've worded it more elegantly, used so many different expressions. But no, Victor chose the phrase "tear his head off"

THE FERALITY! THE POTENTIAL MY GOD. This man is so good at making himself a safe and trustworthy pragmatic person so much you forget there's a wide awake tiger with deadly focus behind those melancholic eyes, weighting your every word and soaking in all the information you unawarly expose to him. Memorising all the names you mention, drawing a map in his brain of your social circle and connections. Saying so little himself just to get you to keep talking and telling him more and more until a secret or two spill out without you realising it.

The way he's briefly quiet before snapping, composing himself, and holding back the flood of rage in his brain from bubbling to the surface. "I would've torn his head off" only scratches the surface of what he really wanted to do and say.

Even this simple sentence from someone usually so polite and level-headed paints a gruesome picture of a predetor's sharp teeth tearing apart a person's brain, completely dislocating the head from the shoulders and tearing the skin off with one bite. The crunching of the skull as it caves under the pressure of the tiger's jaw.

AND THEN YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE AND TELL ME HE IS AN OVERPROTECTIVE YANDERE!! I love you so much.

All that anger directed towards anyone who wishes you harm. It's like you struck a match inside him and now he simply cannot help but watch out for your well being from behind the curtains.

His obsession stems from thinking of you as... lesser to put it kindly. Of course you will never be aware of this condescension nor how he views you as a fragile thing unfit for the real world, a glass figurine that needs to be handled with delicate gloves so you won't crack.

Non the wiser, you think he's just a really good listener. So when he invites you over for tea, you oblige and just spill your heart out to him. Telling him how your week went, talking about the boring details and your hobbies, mentioning the mundane things like your trip to the grocery store.

And he never interrupts, at first you thought it was a little creepy how he'd have you over just to listen to you talk. Only answering with questions and dismissing any questions directed towards him ir his well being, saying he'd rather know about you more.

But with time you warmed him to him, I mean it is Victor Kain? He has never done harm to anyone has he? Sure the Kains have some screws loose but Victor always seemed the calmest one amidst his eccentric family.

You think that maybe he is just lonely and needs company or a friend! He's definitely awkward when it comes to normal conversation, so you're understandable when all he wants to talk about is you.

As far as you're concerned, that's as deep as youre surface relationship goes. It starts with afternoon tea and ands just after the sun sets down when he walks you home, ever the old school gentleman. Strange tho, he never walks anyone else home and lets Maria run loose at any hour of the night. But you've never given it much thought.

You poor sweet thing, so unaware of the monster you're feeding. The obsession you're helping nurture whenever you oblige to his request or head his advice. The rush of satisfaction that runs through his veins when you come running to him to vent after a particularly hard day, the addicting euphoria flooding his system when you thank him for listening, saying how he's the only person you trust with these embarrassing things.

Victor who's pulling strings when you're not looking. Taking over your life and holding power over every aspect of it so he can fine tune it, surgically decide every small detail like he's tinkering with the delicate inner-machinery of a clock.

Making sure he is your sole support system. Coincidentally, the friends you make are offered jobs back at the Capital and have to move away. The grocery near your house relocates, and the closest one is right next to the Kain's resident.

Whichever job you held is deemed too dangerous for someone as helpless as you and he takes it upon himself to talk to someone who talks to someone else who persuades the owner into getting you fired or at least you're out of business if it's privately owned. No one wants your services, they all deeply admire the Kains and would run to please him at the drop of a hat.

No one but Victor who so kindly extends a helping hand. If you refuse chairty money then he immediately suggest working for him instead, he needs a helper you see. No matter what excuse or response you have prepared, he has already accounted for all of them and has a convincing counter-argument.

You don't have to know that in reality, he just thinks the world is too dangerous for you to freely roam and get a job. If you want to play pretend as boss and employee then he will indulge your childish antics and offer you a job, either way the end is the same with you slowly migrating more and more under his wing and care.

Stripped of your income, support system and any opportunity for growth. Once Victor has you in his claws, he will make sure you never slip through his fingers.

Tbf he is content with you just being around, as long as you're safe and sound under his watch he will even if you just see him as a friend and nothing more.

Because while helping you is enthralling, not knowing where you are is the worst withdrawal he has ever experienced. And that man lived at the Capital before, do not let his grown up facade tirck you, he's probably even tried coke and all drugs under the sun at some point in his youth out of sheer boredom or curiosity.

It ircks him thinking you're vulnerable and bare outside for anyone to grab, it makes his brain ache to see you in a situation outside of his own control. He needs you to live in a world of his own making for all of eternity or he feels like ripping his hair out.

Zero expectations are set upon you to do anything. He isn't looking for a slave or a housewife, he just wants to be reassured no harm will ever befall you and keeping you under his watchfull gaze is the best solution he could come up with.

So what if you're basically a glorified pet? You still have your freedom... although limited. You can pursue your hobbies, indulge in his money and even befriend his two kids if you feel like it.

If you get really desperate for company other than his own and the Kains, then maybe he will think about letting you socialise with the other utopians every now and them. The mostly do not pose any dangers but some of them (caught Andrey, Eva and Vlad the Younger) Do really test his patience and boil his blood with jealousy from the shameless sexua advances and romantic propositions they throw your way as if he wasn't in the room.

Still, the utopians are your toys to play with until you're content. Didn't you ask for friends?

But he'd be lying if he said he wasn't thinking of more... forgive his brain, humans are inherently flawed and he cannot help but think of you in rather scandalous ways at times. Animalistic desires of lust and love rearing its head. Whenever you lean too close to him, pat your beautiful eyelashes or call his name out with a faux whine.

He's more than open to a seemingly "normal" relationship with you. As long as you get used to his busy schedule and periods of ignoring the world around him while in deep thought. He lives in his own brain most of the time and you rarely if ever guess what's going on in his life at any give day.

He remains an enigma while settling for nothing less than your whole heart laid bare before him on a silver tray. Proding at the fragile organ, never causing it any harm as he caresses it with gentle fingers. Feigning ignorance of the way his mouth waters, salvia dripping down the sharp fangs.

But again, he's down to compromise. You can only go places if he's by your side, even his own brother, the judge, he doesn't trust to accompany you alone.

-

God that was a fucking treat to write and think about. Talking with you is always so fun, I can just let go and say everything on my mind. When writing fanfics or sharing my thoughts to others I always trim the edges and make sure I'm not repeating myself yk? I have to put in effort to make my thoughts presentable and tied nicely with a bow, compress it down to bite sizes.

But man i am living the dream! A wall of text! my purpose in life! I wrote so much in such a short time that my fingers actually hurt.

Anyway I have more so let's keep going!

-

YANDERE BIG VLAD MY BELOVED.

He'd also fall on the overprotective category but not possessive controlling like Victor Kain. No, He'd want you to genuinely be happy.

Spoils you rotten, without decorum or an excuse. Literally buys you anything and everything, even the things you don't ask for he will get you just because he thought you might like them.

The softest thing with you despite how harsh and uncaring he is with others.

Don't get him wrong. He is still a ruthless businessman with shady and amoral practices, he simply does not care. The only things worth it in this life are the people you love, and he loves his family the most.

Including you! Surprise! He starts considering you part of his family. His love is definitely not just platonic however but he does hold the most shame when it comes to getting together with someone after his dead wife yk?

Especially if you're younger, oh my god he lacks morals yes but this is just humiliating. He gets over it easily.

If you want someone who is extremely self-aware and the guilt of lusting after a young adult really eats him up to the core, then look at none other than Alexander Saburov. Not only is his wife still alive so triple the shame and guilt, but also you're a 20/30 something cutie and he well past middle age. He is getting his ass beaten by his conscience inside his own mind and having a moral crisis.

Anyway, back to Big Vlad. I think he'd try to make you get with his son as a way to coerce you into joining the family, especially if you say he is too old for you.

Try saying Victor Kain is too old for you and that old man 404 errors on the spot then quickly recovers pulls up the shady "well the passage of time is subjective and age does not define a human's mind as long as they are a sound adult" argument. I don't think he himself remembers the fact he is almost 60. Age and time is just a suggestion to the Kains.

However Big Vlad would never pull the "becoming your boss" move ever. He wants you to see him as someone close and in an intimate light, that move will just ruin everything he has built. If he wants to throw money your way then he will shamelessly do it without tact and no one can stop him.

You do get your own worms bodyguards and nice herb brides who watch over you courtesy to him however.

Alexander might be the biggest simp in yanderes but he will hesitate before doing something which conflicts with his convictions.

Big Vlad however, will not.

Your suggestions are heard and the changes you demand in his treatment of the kin are immediately obeyed. He tries his best to please you and make you happy, you literally have this man wrapped around your pinky.

A single kiss would have his brain haywire, all it takes is a pat of your pretty eyelashes and a cute pout and all the complaints fizzle from his brain. You immediately win the argument by default.

While sex is good and all, I feel like he is more of a romantic at heart. Genuinely a big doofus in love and would melt over something as simple as hand holding or having you sleep against his chest. He lives for the early morning breakfast where your eyebrows are scrunched from being so sleepy, as you walk over and sink into his arms.

If Victor Kain treats you like a glorified pet and Alexander Saburov like the temptation & sin incarnate then Big Vlad treats you like royalty, a literal prince/princess fallen into his lap and he's the king who will ensure you have the most pampered and spoiled life ever.

You're not helpless in Big Vlad's eyes, he doesn't infantilise you like Victor Kain does. If anything you're the most capable and talented person in the entire world, which is why you deserve everything good and sweet in it.

-

I have so many more ideas and concepts! I love your idea of Maria and Katerina treating the reader like a doll and dressing you up then making out with you- Like you're just a beautiful thing to them to cuddle with as they fall asleep and string along on dates.

Yandere Maria wouldn't care what you have to say, she never begs or asks, she just takes. The day she decides you are here doll, everyone acknowledges that you are off limits because who in their right mind would oppose Maria??

And while Katerina doesn't hold much power, her husband is the leading authority over the town criminal and justice system. He is also the biggest simp to her and is 100% okay with being a cuck if it means his wife is happy.

If having you as her precious doll to dress up, smooch, and play with will put a stop to her morphine addiction, then he'd step over his own morals and look the other way.

YANDERE ASPITY MY LOVE. She has potential! I adore non-humans obsessing over a human. You're not like other humans, you're full of surprises and she wants to test and study you more. You make her see worth in her life and the world beyond the earth and why she was born.

I also like the implication that since she is literally a piece cut from boddho's heart and moulded into a person like clay, that if she falls in love with you then the earth itself would too. With Yandere Aspity you get a Yandere Boddoh and the entirety of the kin for free!

Maybe even possessive Aspity who doesn't want to share you with the earth, who refuses to hand you over and wants you to be hers. A piece of the earth defying its original self, establishing herself as her own person by choosing to love you and never share you.

But my food already went cold, and my fingers are growing numb, so I will cut it short for now.

Ha. Short. I say while having written the entire front page article of a gossipy small town's newspaper.

Do tell me about your thoughts! I love hearing them and reading what you write! Be it your thoughts about other yanderes or your opinions of what I have written. Or even an entirely different concept in general.

Lastly, thank you so much for the praise! I'm glad you liked my Andrey fic. He was a bit challenging to write because as you can see I specialised in romanticism and down bad old men and he's a fuck boy with anger issues and a renaissance man. So I had to conceade that no, he won't take you on picnics but he will take you to get your nipples pierced and maybe get a matching set of his own.

I'm happy you like my smut! I struggled a lot with figuring out how to write it ironically- I stuided romance and fluff I didn't take any good dick courses! So I only improved through trial and error, I changed my smut style so many times ah- The current one is the one I like most!

[wisteria-lodge]

badger secondary + burnt lion secondary (fun bird model) (healthy bookeeper badger model) (unhealthy courtier badger model)

Hey, there! So, I've known my primary for a while now (Badger Primary) but I've been a little bit all over the place with my secondary. Was hopin' for a little help.

The one I'm positive I'm not is a Lion Secondary. I have a Double Lion best friend, and I could NEVER be as blunt as she is, and I'd never tell her this, but I honestly wouldn't want to. Lol! Being honest is an incredibly important thing to be, but there's a difference, at least in my mind, between honesty and saying the first thing that comes to your mind without letting it go through at least a little editing first.

Gotta keep the intended audience in mind.

Yeah, not sounding like a Lion secondary. And I'm kind of thinking Deliberate secondary for you (Bird or Snake.) What you're doing doesn't actually seem *automatic.*

For Bird, there's a possibility. I'm seen as very anxious, and I find new situations pretty stressful.

I mean, anyone can be anxious... and especially if it's a VERY new situation - that can be a lot for anybody.

I love collecting knowledge, and I always have an assortment of fun facts at hand that I've tirelessly collected over the years. It's a fun thing for me, and I enjoy doing it. I was also seen as very "intellectual" in school (which I know is not a requirement for being a Bird or a clear indication of being one, but I figured I'd mention it.) Loved school and loved learning, and I still love learning in my adulthood.

The issue is that, when the chips are down, and it's actually time to solve a problem, I tend to just kinda freeze mentally. The way Bird Secondaries are described, it's like, when a problem happens, they pull on a tool they've created for the situation, and then BOOM, they're using it to handle it.

Birds are good at retrofitting old tools to new situations, it's true. But I don't think I talk enough about what happens when a Bird just... comes up with nothing. And I think the answer is they start looking like a Lion secondary, kind of flailing around.

(I also think that *young* Bird secondaries have a way of looking kind of like Lions, because they haven't had an opportunity to build their tools yet.)

When bad things happen, my mind goes blank. I just kinda start doing stuff, anything. Sure, I might remember something important, like some specific training, but for the most part, my brain goes blank and I go into autopilot.

I don't know *how* bad we're talking here. But if you're in full on SURVIVAL mode, this is where the fight/flight/freeze/fawn kicks in. The reason training gets drilled in like that is so it *stays* when your brain isn't working. I've always found that the really intense stuff feels very quiet, and very dreamlike in the moment, and the emotions don't kick in until later. But the point is... that's not SHC stuff.

So far, you read as someone with a fun Bird model that you love, but your problem-solving is probably coming from somewhere else. (Or possibly it's Burnt...)

For Badger Secondary, I think that's the secondary I wish I could be, but I don't think I am. I have ADHD, so being meticulous and thoughtful are just... absolutely exhausting to me.

It might look a little different, but you can 100% be a Badger secondary with ADHD.

I was raised in a family that really pushed always being a Badger Secondary, forget about yourself, help others, others' problems are more pressing than your own.

Oooh that's not a Badger secondary family. What you're describing here is an Exploded Badger primary culture. And if you're a Badger primary yourself... I bet that got confusing.

(100% your family might have ALSO have required Badger secondaries from everyone, I would think that's likely. So I'll keep that in mind.)

Part of me didn't believe it, but much of me still does. I like to help, I want to help, but I'm also Badger Primary, which can feed that want. Secondary is about what you naturally do to serve what you want, and I'm not sure if Badger Secondary is right. But, I do try to be there for people. My natural instinct when someone is in danger is to protect and comfort them, I'm very focused on the mental/emotional state of the victim more than anything else.

Gee, you write like you're a rescue worker or a firefighter. (And a Badger primary.)

When in any kind of conflict at work, I want to soothe them, to calm them down, and I try to become what I think they might want me to be to help them calm down, but it doesn't always work. Part of me also always wants to tell those people fuck it, you caused your own problem, you're on your fucking own. Lol. And it would feel good to tell them that. I wish more tough love was accepted in the world, generally. I would feel like I could breathe more.

Okay, there's a lot going on here. You "become what I think they might want me to be" which is - Deliberate. And more Snake than Bird, because of the whole one-face-per-person thing. (It not working all the time is neither here nor there, you're human, you'll make the wrong call sometimes.)

But... you like the idea of a more tough-love Lion secondary approach. "I would feel like I could breathe more." And there's something about the Badger secondary that you like... maybe it's that "No, you move" energy.

As for Snake Secondary... this one might be it. Only problem is... I kind of don't want it to be? I know there's a whole thing about not letting go stereotypes get in the way, but I want to be the person I pretend to be, I guess. I want to be a Badger Secondary, but I'm afraid I'm a Snake Secondary because, from experience, people do not like you when you behave the way you truly want to. They shun you.

"Behave the way you truly want to."

Okay, let's unpack that.

The face-changing guys (Snake and Bird) want to be behave that way. They are authentic, in that their face-changing is consensual. Same thing with a Courtier Badger, with the caveat that their face-changing isn't as much of a deliberate choice. But it's still something that they want to do.

They can all run into situation where their face-changing is forced on them (becomes non-consensual) and is therefore inauthentic. This is a separate issue from the Lion secondary "eh, I'm going to rub some people the wrong way just by existing, comes with the territory, whatever." And I don't know which one is you.

If I wanna speak more "bluntly," not like my friend, but just more plainly, feel more like ME and less like a persona, people find me too negative, too sarcastic, I speak for too long, or I'm somehow either too passionate or dispassionate and I'm never ENOUGH either way. The performance is tiring. I want to be free to be me, but the true me isn't particularly good at anything.

Oh you're Burnt. I'm so sorry.

Because what you are talking about here is neurodivergent masking. (Which is totally different from Snake masking, I'm sorry the words are the same, I know it's confusing.)

'Too negative' shows up when you don't know if a comment is appropriate to the conversation or not. 'Too sarcastic' happens when you make a joke that doesn't land. 'Speaking for too long' - hyperfixations. 'Too passionate' - probably hypersensitivity. 'Too dispassionate' - possibly a flat affect, or a tendency to shut down.

Now I do not diagnose people here. That is impossible and unethical. But I can say that it sounds like you're masking all the time and that is exhausting. Especially especially for a Badger primary who needs communities they feel safe in, basically to exist.

I promise, I promise, I promise that there are communities out there where you can take off the mask.

I try to be who people want me to be, I try to be the puzzle piece that fits best in the world's puzzle, and I fail at that. I'm never quite what they're looking for.

It sounds like you're desperately trying to model Courtier Badger secondary, and it's hurting you.

Too clumsy, too forgetful, too focused on unimportant things, and I ultimately can't keep up the facade, the cracks begin to show that I'm a fraud and this put-together, organized person is absolutely NOT who I am, and I am shunned.

So you've built yourself a Bookkeeper Badger model. In order to keep your life organized. Good. But then you're guilty and like, sort of imposter-syndrome about the fact that this isn't your entire personality, that this isn't *enough*

Then, I try to be myself. More funny, more sarcastic, slightly more blunt, just slightly, just enough to reveal the passionate and opinionated person I am underneath. I woukd never want to actually hurt anyone's feelings, but I have to air out the things I truly feel every once in a while. I have to be me.

Sorry to break it to you, but you're a lion secondary. And you're plenty likable.

But, at least in some circles, I scare people away. Like it's sudden whiplash in the differences between my two personalities. Those I meet while trying to be my put-together persona are usually really turned off by the more real, true me. They usually don't get me, think my interests are weird, or that I'm just too intense (hearing Angelica Schuyler describe herself in Hamilton the first time... I'd never felt more seen by a character in something EVER. Some men say that I'm intense or I'm insane. Lol!)

Angelica's a pretty loud Lion secondary.

Now, I know to some degree it's my own Lion primary talking, but I read this and think "that sounds like a them problem." I know that having a Badger primary is going to make thinking that way harder, and having an Exploded Badger family culture is going to make it even harder than that.

But, I don't know what to tell you. You sound fun to hang out with. And there's a reason Badger Lion is the Protagonist sorting, and the Starfleet Officer sorting. People *like* them.

Well, anyway, that was a long winded way to ask for some help. Lol! Were you able to pick up on any clues? Thanks so much if you even attempted to read this! Lol.

Always with the Burnt secondaries and the apologies....

[gillianthecat]

well, i'm not really shocked about it, but my executive function basically collapses on saturdays. it would be nice if it didn't, but i'm also cutting myself some slack about it. i think my brain just needs at least one day a week to let go of all self discipline. it's inconvenient, but i'm hoping it will work as a pressure valve so i can stay on top of things the rest of the week.

i did not sleep at all last night and instead compulsively went through someone's tumblr blog looking for all the personal details of her life even though our interests don't really overlap because she's the same age as me, she posted actual photos of herself and family (which felt slightly shocking on this website, though i know she's not the only one by far) and there were hints that she lived in the same area as me (it turns out she does). that happens sometimes, I get fascinated by some random person's online presence and want to dig up all the details that i can about them. not because i necessarily find the person themselves that interesting, it's more about the hunt for snippets of information. And, like with this woman, it's often someone who is like me in a few ways, but otherwise very different, so it feels like a glimpse at the mundanities of an alternate life i might have lived, although don't actually want. I used to get my fix of the details of ordinary other people's lives from the blogs of adult ballet students and ballroom dancers, and the occasional organizing/interior design blog, but sadly long form blogging like that seems to have basically disappeared. I never regularly followed youtubers but occasionally fell down a rabbit hole and obsessively watched people's entire oeuvres in a ridiculous binge.

and then a random link on that first tumblr-er's blog led me to an article in a magazine that then suggested a second article that was so awful, written by someone who someone who styled themselves a "public intellectual" but was either so implausibly naive about reality that it boggled the mind, or cynically pretending to be naive for... stirring up controversy? pandering to white racists? who the fuck knows - that i felt compelled to find all the bad reviews talking shit about him, partly to reassure myself that i had not lost my grip on my reality, that it was this writer who was talking absolute nonsense, and partly just to enjoy other people tearing him to shreds. i even when to twitter, for gods sake (this is how we know my executive function is in shambles). i did find many people there destroying him, managed to avoid reading his own tweets or that of his supporters, and got off in under an hour, so as twitter forays go, it wasn't too dangerous.

last saturday's executive dysfunction all-nighter was mostly dedicated to aimless scrolling of tumblr corners that i don't usually visit, but there i also found someone who made no sense, and felt compelled to dig through there blog to see if learning more about them helped me understand what they were trying to say any better. it did not. their blog was mostly reblogs of random things, then them reblogging political/philosophical posts with incoherent but aggressive sounding arguments. i dug into the notes, because of course i did, and anyone who bothered to respond was like "i have no idea what you're trying to say so i'm not going to argue with you." i finally blocked them, just to stop myself from digging further.

mostly i'm writing this out in order to get back to my self; i feel like my sense of who i am and what i want gets lost as i go on this little explorations of other people's worlds. which i think is what i'm craving when i do it; to not have to be a coherent person for a little while. but if it goes on too long than i find it hard to become myself again, and all the tasks that have remained undone while i went away pile up and make me want to go back into hiding. but i am hopeful i've caught it in time that i can get back to being functional, and finish my homework and laundry and not start the week feeling so terribly behind.

the other reason for executive dysfunction is that i have a writing assignment (gasp!). it is a very small one—to write the introduction to our physiology lab report for my lab group—but i'm feeling very stuck about it. i think because i feel caught between wanting to make it sound like an introduction to an actual scientific paper and the reality that this is an intro level physiology lab that is not doing original research and that we came up with our hypotheses on the spot with little to back them up besides a gut feeling. so i think i just have to get over wanting to write a "good" introduction, and just bullshit something. (this is why i'm taking science classes. i get so stuck on doing academic writing. it took me an extra two years to turn in my undergrad thesis even after i finished all my coursework.)

here's a picture being the "subject" for my physio lab and looking like i'm about to get a jump start.

well. i could ramble on forever. but i will try to take this momentum i've rebuilt and go get things done.

(it would have been nice if my complete collapse of will power had led me to catch up on QL shows instead, but alas, that is now too close to things i "should" do, even though i love them. my brain seems to only accept complete and absolute time wasting.)

[onewomancitadel]

WOW. Incredible response. I havent read your fic yet but now I am seriously considering it. I walked into this blog thinking Jaune/Cinder was just some weird crack ship. I believed all the typical stuff I see you mention like "she 2 evul theres no way!" lol but as I continued reading I slowly started to realize that this ship made sense. A LOT of sense. Im still trying to overcome my "you cant date a villain" programming but your posts are peeling back the layers of my biases. Again, thank you.

(Context).

This is a lovely message, thank you! I'm very glad you enjoyed my response. Most of all, whether or not you agree with what I say here, I just hope you enjoy figuring things out on your own and come to your own conclusions.

The reason why I take issue with that idea of 'you can't date a villain' er, programming, as you say, is because I think it's an idea taken for granted that doesn't appreciate what an individual story be trying to say... and I think trying to unpack some of our assumptions about the way stories should work is interesting. I am a big fan of R/WBY, for instance, and I wonder what it is about my background that makes me different from others who really don't like, say - let's get polemic here - Penny or Ironwood's character arcs.

So, I think that if you come to your own conclusions and draw your own boundaries about what you're comfortable with in fiction and you still don't like villains, redemption arcs, or - anything, really - you are more than allowed to do that, and you certainly don't need my permission to do so to begin with.

On the other hand, I really appreciate you taking the time to read my blog and respectfully interact with me, even if we're not necessarily working on the same wavelength (or might be working towards that? lol), and I was (and am) more than happy to elaborate on my ideas - particularly when sometimes things that are obvious to me are not necessarily obvious to you. I can point you to posts that might be helpful (if I can find them) and tags, or I am happy to expand as well... I am actually very happy to interact with people, and getting a good anon is really fun to respond to.

The question of Jaune/Cinder as a rarepair as opposed to a crackship is something we've discussed before, and I've had an anon before say very recently to me that they believed the same thing:

Oh yeah, we have had the crackship vs. rarepair debate before (and somewhere back September last year I responded to an ask by redhoodhungergames about Knightfall as a rarepair but I can't find it), and the linguistic evolution of conflating rarepair with crackship meanwhile crackships nevertheless take on fandom precedence due to panfandom baggage (e.g. searching to insert the same archetypes irrespective of canon context and pairing them together even if wholesale inventing most of the characterisation).

So, that's rather interesting... once you see and don't just look...

Nyeheheheh.

Personally I feel on this level Jaune/Cinder works as a successful twist, which whether or not it's in everybody's personal favour, has strong motivation in favour for it. (Or, let's say that Knightfall being controversial might be a reason in favour for it).

Regarding my fic, you are welcome to read it ('it' being my longfic, but there are others on my profile... you may not want to get to those first though lol) but do spare me if you don't enjoy it. (; There's no pressure though, and really I just wanted to emphasise that I don't think of myself as a professional meta writer, and also that I genuinely struggled to intellectually articulate 'why' they ought to love each other... it's something very emotional to me.

Also, from what I've been told and the vibe I get from my readers, my fic doesn't exactly follow the form of other R/WBY fics, and that can be a good or a bad thing depending on individual taste. I'm not trying to make it sound more than it is, just if you have certain expectations, it might be affronting. I'm not trying to sound pretentious or anything or make it sound like more than it is, but why I'm wary about recommending my work at all is because a) it's intensely personal and b) I don't read other R/WBY fic and come from a literary background and really emphasise the mythic/fairytale/literary elements of R/WBY. So, what you see here about the way I talk about R/WBY canon definitely influences my writing.

I am definitely happy to expand on any more topics, I did link you the Knightfall masterpost and I can talk about other R/WBY ships if that would help.

Now, on a more specific point about Cinder being too evil: that's the really interesting part because Knightfall is linked to Cinder's redemption arc. So to understand Knightfall you need a coherent theory of redemption and redemption in R/WBY. I don't read this romance as happening independently of her redemption arc, so anything I say under my Cindemption tag is equally applicable to how one needs to view Knightfall. I enjoy the idea that Cinder's meant to be the Fall Maiden (redeeming our perspective of the power - as more than just a powerlevel - through her perspective), and Jaune's meant to finally help (and fall in love with) this Fall Maiden... just not the one you thought. It's bittersweet, but it ends on a hopeful note.

Knightfall is the thematic lynchpin to everything I think is valuable and interesting and at the heart of R/WBY, from Ozlem to the Maiden power to how the heroes will prevail and what it means to be heroic... it's one part of the picture, for sure, it's not the Jaune and Cinder Show, but I think that's part of what makes the ship really beautiful, the fact it's this essential connection against an epic backdrop.

I can never predict if something goes wrong in the story, but I do feel satisfied that things I thought were going to happen have happened in the show based on the way I intuited them... so they do have some sense of coherent storytelling and foreshadowing. The reason I bring up Penny and Ironwood is because I felt those story points were self-evident and flagged very effectively, and thematically justified... cue me logging onto Tumblr and seeing otherwise lol. So, I feel like I have some understanding of the show and why it does things the way it does, and that's why I feel taking other Jaune or Cinder ships for granted is terribly dangerous, because I've seen other things taken for granted - like Penny becoming a new main character and joining the cast and having Friendship Hijinks - that ended in a lot of intense personal pain for people. Similarly to them, though, I would never want to lead anybody astray (not that they did, but I am talking about some stuff that is very emotionally... touching, let's say), and so that's why I think coming to your own conclusion is necessary. And more fun. (:

It is very interesting to receive this ask because yes, I've had a few people say as much as you're saying, and what I'm personally wondering is how the show seeks to accomplish this (this potential change of opinion). As a Cinder fan for a long time, it's been interesting to see more sympathy for her after V8, for instance. I would say now is as good a time as any to be a Cinder fan, which is really saying something for how bad it used to be lol.

As I said, Knightfall would be a crazy twist (so would Cindemption for those who don't see it coming) and it would recontextualise their characters together... and to me I think really justify both of them lol. So there's a lot wrapped up in it that's really interesting.

Thanks again for your lovely ask and hope you have a good day. Thank you for your genuine interest and being so considerate! <3 <3

[unnamed-atlas]

Bitches will really point at tiktok and be like "But it doesn't have this characteristic that vine had so it's bad! Stop calling me old you're just stupid for liking this app because it isn't iconic like vine was"

Bestie you are in fact old. And a loser. Calm down.

[polyghostfacehours]

Omgg first of all I love this idea so much and it's made me so happy :)).

I struggle to describe myself so I'll do my best here, btw id like it to be romantic and for the emoji 👹.

For starters I'm a black woman, caramel skin tone on the lighter side, 5'5", kinda regular skinny build but with a dumptruck lowkey, hair is usually in braids or a big afro. I'm introvert and I get SUPER shy, giggly, and overwhelmed when I'm around someone I'm attracted to, but once I'm closer to ppl and with my friends I can be rlly talkative and chaotic in my own way but I'm still more chill and passive MOST of the time. I'm the kinda person who kind of unconsciously shifts energy to balance with the people I'm around. Idk how to say this part without sounding dickish but I'm rlly smart and academics/intelligence has always been a big part of my identity. I consider myself pretty funny as well and I usually make all my friends laugh a lot.

I tend to have issues connecting with my emotions/feeling empathy or feelings intense emotions myself and I usually don't understand where ppl are coming from if they're operating mostly on emotions but I don't think I come off as cold or robotic. I'm an INTP, if you're into mbti types at all.

In terms of style I'm mostly a mix of punk and gothic and I usually dress pretty "out there", mostly black and red, lots of layered jewelry and ripped tights, skulls, bats, chains, the works, but also a lot of band tees. I diy a lot of my clothes. I'm into similar music styles emo, punk, metal/screamo, alt rock, new wave, but I also enjoy indie on the reg. I'm pretty much listening to music or true crime podcasts constantly. I love horror ofc but I tend to go more for intellectual (?) Horror than slashers. Think every movie that Tara listed in scream 5. I'm a huge film hoe in general and my letterboxd stays busy.

Sexually I see myself as kinky and mostly a sub despite being an actual unkissed virgin🥲 this website as well as fanfiction skewed my sexual interests pretty early on lol. Idk how much I should go into actually kinks but I like degradation and power play...I think I'll just leave it at that lol. I also like to smoke weed semi regularly. This feels long as fuck so I'm gonna end it here, ig just message me if you'd want clarification on anything?

My second to last (I think) match-up left! Sorry this took 84 years lmao.

So, romantically, I match you a little bit more with Billy BUT, you're mostly on the middle of the line bc tbh you'd match really well with Stu as well

- One of the reasons you'd fit so well with both of them is your tendency to unconsciously shifts your energy to balance others out. You'd be the middle man of Billy and Stu, being able to balance them out due to your more flexible nature. That being said, you getting chaotic and talkative once you get to know them makes Stu ecstatic since he has a kindred spirit. And though Billy would never admit it, he loves having two energetic partners!

- You're a film hoe and also like the more intellectual/elevated horror films, which is something you can for sure bond with Billy with. Bill loves quote unquote "pretentious" films, because he's pretty pretentious himself lol (not saying you are bc you like them, just that Billy for sure is lmao). Stu likes those movies too, as he likes any horror in general, but also you cant stop him from putting splatterfests lol.

- Your alt style ofc appeals a lot to Stu, but Billy also loves the look, especially the band tees. I can easily see you and Billy chilling, you in an oversized band tee, listening to some true crime podcasts and trying to deconstruct them. Or blasting music while talking about the nuances of Carrie.

- Your more subby nature works because Stu is a natural switch and Billy is a dom mostly. You being the one who usually subs for both of them or letting Stu dom for once is a much needed balance to the relationship. You don't conflict too much with Billy, and you let Stu take control too. I will say though, if you end up being a go-getter in bed after getting some more experience, they'd both be pleasantly surprised!

[mimisempai]

I made a wish and you came true

Summary:

Sylvie asks to see what the prince of Loki looks like. When he shows her she laughs at him. Count on Professor Loki to give her a lecture about his Prince.

🌈 Happy Pride month ! 🌈

To celebrate, 1 day, 1 story.

Be ready for smiles, laugh, fluff, tooth rotthing fluff, positive vibes and a lot of love!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/32183185

1731 words - Rating G

In storm-black mountains, I wander alone

Over the glacier I make my way

In the apple garden stands the maiden fair and sings,

"When will you come home?"

Loki had to stop, overwhelmed by emotion.

Sylvie, her eyes devoid of all mockery, said softly, "So there is a would-be-princess somewhere..."

Loki chuckled sadly before replying, "I like metaphors you know, in this instance, it's not a princess, it's a prince, and I don't know if he's waiting for me or hoping to see me again, it's not even really my home, but..."

"...but you'd like to believe it, right?"

Loki could only nod.

"Show me your prince."

"No way," Loki replied, shaking his head.

"Come on, please Loki!" she paused before continuing, "If you show it to me I'll tell you in detail how I enchant people!

Loki couldn't resist, so he turned his hand and there appeared a mini hologram of Mobius.

Sylvie approached and looked at him closely before sitting down again.

Loki made Mobius disappear.

"Don't tell me that that little man with no stature, no class is YOUR prince?!"

Loki wished he had his brother's hammer to blast her with lightning bolts.

"Yes this is my prince! And your impudence has earned you a lecture on the definition of Prince Charming by Professor Loki!"

Sylvie snorted and told the passing maid to bring her a glass of champagne, because finally she was going to need it.

"First of all, you should know that the charming prince doesn't exist only in fairy tales.

In real life, he is not perfect but he has many qualities that are essential to be wonderful. Is Mobius my Prince Charming?" He didn't wait for an answer.

"To find out, I'll show you point by point that he meets all the criteria that make him a prince for me."

Sylvie settled back in her chair to enjoy the show.

"First, the Prince Charming is generous. He is generous in every sense of the word. He doesn't hesitate to invite you to an excellent restaurant and to offer you a gift you've been dreaming of. Ok, ok, I agree, I didn't have time to fully test that point. But that's not all! He is also generous in giving you all the time you need. He is also able to have an attention that will brighten your day. And Mobius devoted an enormous amount of time to me, when nothing required him to."

Loki thought back to the time Mobius had spent with him just before they left for the mission. He had taken the time to show Loki that he wasn't the villain he thought he was. Nothing forced him to.It wasn't necessary for the mission. In a place where everything was about time, Mobius hadn't hesitated to give him time.

Sylvie simply nodded and waved her hand impatiently for Loki to continue his «  lecture."

He took a sip, cleared his throat and continued.

"Second, the Prince Charming committed. He knows what he wants. He gets up every morning knowing exactly where he is going and what he wants to do. He is also resolute, he has goals in life and intends to achieve them. What is touching is that he is not bragging. Humility is his middle name. Quite my Mobius."

Sylvie noted, fondly, the possessive pronoun, but said nothing.

"Even though he pisses me off, because he is narrow-minded about the TVA,  what he thinks is real. Nevertheless, he still manages to impress me because he believes that what he does is his reality and that he does it for a better world, he does it with all his heart. And when he talks about it there is so much candor that even I have a hard time getting him to see the reality of things."

Loki remembered their discussion in the cafeteria.

Loki had asked him completely sincerely, because he wanted to know what made Mobius go on, "I mean, you really believe in all this stuff, don't you?"

Mobius had replied simply, "I don't get hung up on, 'Believe, not believe.' I just accept what is."

Loki had tried to show him the absurdity of a world ruled by the 3 time keepers and Mobius had replied by telling him that his story, Asgard, mystical realm, beyond the stars, Frost Giants was the same thing.

He remembered Mobius' words perfectly, "Actually it's exactly the same thing. Because if you think too hard about where any of us came from, who we truly are, it sounds kinda ridiculous. Existence is chaos. Nothing makes any sense, so we try to make some sense of it. And I'm just lucky that the chaos I emerged into gave me all this... My own glorious purpose."

Loki had chuckled, to hide the fact that he was disturbed by the accuracy of Mobius' argument.

Mobius concluded by saying, determined, "Cause the TVA is my life. And it's real because I believe it's real."

Committed, yes, his prince was. Loki realized that he missed their discussion. Rarely had he met someone who could resist him intellectually.

"Hey! Loki! Are you there? "Sylvie was waving her hand, seeing that he was lost in his thoughts.

Loki regained his composure and moved on to his next point.

"Third, the Prince Charming for me must be smart but not pretentious, yes because there can only be one pretentious and that is me of course. Who wouldn't want a smart, educated man? Mobius is extremely smart! Can you believe that he knows hundreds of languages more than I do because he has been working in the multiverse for so long! And best of all, when I tried to manipulate him on my first consulting assignment, he figured me out. He almost knew right away that I was trying to play for my own side. Okay, it's a little humiliating. But that's the charm of him."

If Loki was honest, that was when he started to fall under Mobius' spell.

He had been so sure that he could get what he wanted from him. He was sure he had hooked the fish and then Mobius had blurted out, "He's lying. Just playing games. There's no one out there."

Loki blushed slightly as he thought about how he had been found out by Mobius at that moment. That's when his interest had been piqued, because Loki couldn't resist a challenge.

"You know Loki, it's almost cute how you have it bad."

"There's nothing funny about that." retorted Loki before resuming, "Fourth, my prince is someone I can lean on. He is a pillar on which you can rest. Imagine, Sylvie, we were working at the same desk and I fell asleep. And on top of that he let me sleep. You know he has this quiet strength. That thing that makes me know that with him I don't have to pretend anymore. But anyway, I was talking about Mobius, not me."

Sylvie moved closer to Loki and said with a smile, "From my point of view it's the same thing."

"What?"

"Nothing, go on."

Loki looked at her strangely before continuing.

"Fifth, my prince is listening. You know I talk a lot and three quarters of the time to say nothing important. But Mobius, even if I tell him something stupid, he listens to me as if it were the most important thing in the world. And most importantly, he really hears me. He can read between my lines and my metaphors, which he also loves. He's much better at getting people to talk than I am. He was able to see and make me say things about myself that no one had heard before. Sometimes I feel like he's the only one who knows who I really am."

Loki had to stop because the scene was still so present in his mind.

"I can't go back, can I? Back to my timeline. I don't enjoy hurting people. I... I don't enjoy it. I do it because I have to, because I've had to."

Mobius' tone, his look, his whole being turned toward Loki when he had said just that, "Okay, explain that to me.

Then Loki told him that he knew he was a villain.

Mobius' simple but straightforward answer was, "That's not how I see it."

"Hey Loki? You okay?" Sylvie had put her hand on his arm, looking concerned.

Loki pulled himself together.

"Yeah I'm fine."

He coughed and continued, "My Prince Mobius has an incredible number of qualities but I've summarized them for you because we don't have enough time. So I'm going to conclude this lesson by telling you that the quality that attracts me most to him is that he's surprising. He surprises me all the time. Which is paradoxical after all, I am supposed to be chaos and he is supposed to be order. But he surprises me. Where everyone else hates me, he is there and sees qualities in me that even I don't see. When everyone wants me gone, he doesn't hesitate to put his own head on the line so that I don't get erased. Mobius is not perfect, but he is perfect for me. Because precisely, he doesn't put me on a pedestal but he doesn't make me feel inferior either. He treats me as an equal."

"Okay, okay, okay, it's fine he's a Prince. But the mustache though..."

Loki looked mischievously at her and leaning in close to her ear, he said softly, "His moustache is very nice when he kisses me."

"Loki!" she moved back and flicked him on the forehead.

He took a sip of champagne and they remained silent for a few moments.

"And you told him all this, well not in so many words of course?"

Loki's smile disappeared.

"Because of you, I didn't have the time. And I hope that all of this won't have ruined this beginning of a relationship.Anyway, I'll tell him when we meet again, or at least I'll try to, as long as he wants to listen to me..."

Sylvie smiled softly, clinked her glass against Loki's and said softly, "You're insufferable to the core, but I sincerely wish you'd have the chance to talk to him. "

Loki nodded, this time he was determined to fight, because for the first time it was his own happiness that depended on it.

_______

The whole serie here : The story of Loki and Mobius

Not beta'd I hope you enjoyed it 🥰

[pinky-the-elephant-room]

SapioSexual

★☆ AN: So, this prompt is dedicated to anyone attracted to nerds and science. Look I’m terrible at chemistry so I made Kuroo a jack of all trades while still being ace at chemistry. Also, thanks to @succulent-momma​ and @drabbles-blurbs-words​ for editing this for me.

★☆ Summary: It’s not Kuroo’s fault, not really. It’s not his fault that every time he opened his mouth to talk like that you just wanted to throw yourself at him. 

★☆ Warning: Explicit sex, Size Kink, and Rough sex. Read at your own discretion. Kuroo x Fem Reader. 

★☆ ★☆ ★☆ ★☆ ★☆ ★☆ 

Kuroo considered himself fairly handsome and was well-liked by most people. Except by his teammates who nicknamed him "demon captain". And of course, Kenma who would frequently throw some jabs his way. But he was nice to girls. In fact, he was a gentleman to every girl he met, only accompanied by mild playful teasing when the moment required it. Most girls, in his humble opinion, wanted his attention and frankly desired to date him. Except for Y/N.

He would never forget that particular day in 2nd year when she turned him down in front of his team. Kuroo and Kenma were heading home after volleyball practice accompanied by Yaku and Yamamoto, who were heading out as well.

Kuroo, noticing Y/N, called out, "Y/N-chan!"

Y/N turned around to see Kuroo waving at her, to which she only frowned in return.

"So, Y/N-chan, when are you going to take up on my offer of going on a date soon?"

"Over my dead body," she murmured before flouncing away.

Yaku had burst out laughing, enjoying Kuroo's embarrassment. Yamamoto tried to spare his senpai's feelings knowing the pain of being rejected all too well. But it was just too satisfying to watch smug Kuroo get turned down. Yamamoto collapsed in howling fits. Kuroo could even see Kenma hiding a smirk underneath his long bangs while trying and failing to look absorbed in his PSP.

She perplexed the hell out of him. He didn't understand where he went wrong with Y/N. In fact, she only displayed uninterest most of the time he attempted to talk to her.

★☆ ★☆

  However, he finally started making headway in his third year. Y/N, lo and behold, was in his class. Making it easier for him to talk to her. She was resistant to his efforts at first, but one particular day she let her guard down.

"Y/N-chan, how did you do on your chemistry test?" he inquired, looking at his 98.

He could feel her glare, and so Kuroo looked up to shoot a smirk at her.

"An 85. Probably better than your score," she huffed.

"Not today, sweetheart. Looks like I win." He sat back in his chair and radiated smugness.

Y/N leaned over from her chair to look at his score, and he could see her eyes widen in shock.

"How? You had two practice matches this week against rival schools back to back! When did you get the time to study?" Y/N blurted out.

"I'm flattered you know so much about my schedule."

She avoided eye contact and cleared her throat. "Don't get it twisted. It's hard not to know when that's all you've talked about for two weeks."

Kuroo's smirk just got bigger. "And here I thought you don't listen to poor old me. I'm smarter than you think I am. I don't need to study a lot to get adequate grades."

Y/N seemed a bit incredulous.

"Then why isn't your rank higher?" she challenged.

"Well, we can't all be ranked second like you. But you're right. My rank could be better if I tried more. But I don't need to because my grades just have to be good enough to play volleyball and get into a decent university. It's not like I'm going to be a doctor."

Y/N stared at him for a moment before requesting if she could look at his test to see what she did wrong. Kuroo shrugged and gave it to her.

He could feel Y/N's inquisitive gaze on him the rest of the day. But every time he turned to see, her long dark hair hid her face. It was puzzling, to say the least.

As the bell rang and he was about to leave for volleyball practice, Y/N stopped him.

"Kuroo, next time there's a chemistry test can we study together?" she asked him almost shyly.

A bit dazed by her request, he only nodded, to which she responded with, "great! See you tomorrow."

  ★☆ ★☆

Days began to fly by with Y/N still somehow talking to him, their topics ranging from academic to inane intellectual discussions.

"Ne Kuroo, do you think there's any truth to Jurassic Park? Like theoretically, can we bring back dinosaurs?" she asked him one morning after biology.

He blinked at the question and put his mechanical pencil down. Y/N reminded him too much of a particular beanpole dinosaur enthusiast in that moment.

"Not really. Because think about it, not only would we need to have a perfect DNA replica to duplicate, meaning the bullshit explanation from the movie of filling the missing DNA structures with DNA from modern species wouldn't work. But we would also need to recreate the environment these creatures thrived in. The current Earth right now is colder than they're used to. Then we would also have to recreate the same food sources. These dinosaurs didn't evolve to eat grass or cows. Plain and simple, they wouldn't survive."

Y/N's face brightened. "Exactly! Oh, and did you see the new dinosaur they discovered in Hokkaido? It's called Kamuysaurus. It's a different species of Hadrosaurid." She continued enthusiastically explaining to him what made the Kamuysaurus different from other Hadrosaurid species. It was kind of boring, to be honest; he wasn't much of a dinosaur fan, but he listened intently, feeling satisfied knowing that Y/N's attention was solely on him.

   ★☆ ★☆

The next week as Kuroo was walking home with Kenma, he noticed Y/N going inside a bookstore.

"Kenma, I'm going to go ahead, alright?" Kuroo said as he watched Y/N curiously.

Kenma looked up to see Kuroo staring at Y/N. "She's just going to yell at you again."

"Don't worry; I got it handled. See you tomorrow." Without waiting to hear his childhood friend's response, Kuroo ran to catch up to her before she left the store.

The store's bell jingled, and an employee welcomed him inside. He walked around for a bit before finally finding Y/N in the back, intensely reading a book. He walked up behind her and placed his hand on her shoulder.

Y/N jumped and let out a squeak. She relaxed, seeing his smirking face "Kami-sama! Kuroo, don't do that! You scared the crap out of me!"

He chuckled at her reaction and stepped closer into her personal space. Looking over her shoulder to catch a glimpse of what she was reading.

"Stars and constellations? Since when are you into astronomy?" he asked.

"Well, it's a fairly new hobby. Chichiue and I are planning a trip to the mountains to chart stars. I thought it would help me to know what we are looking at."

She tried to move away to put some space between them, but he just grabbed her waist and rested his chin on her shoulder.

"Hmm, need some help?"

She turned around and cocked her eyebrow at him. "Let me guess you know some things about astronomy too?"

He just ignored the sarcasm in her voice before going on a tangent. "Well, did you know at the center of every galaxy is a gigantic black hole that is gradually sucking everything inside? That's how we got the image of a swirling galaxy that we know today. Just in the Milky Way alone, there's about ten million to a billion other smaller black holes."

Kuroo stopped to glance at Y/N, who was looking back at him keenly, before continuing.

"And the name of the supermassive black hole at the center of our galaxy is-"

"Sagittarius A," Y/N finished almost breathlessly.

Kuroo joked, "guess you also know some things about astron-"

He failed to complete his sentence when Y/N yanked him down by his school uniform and captured his lips. Her kiss was harsh and greedy as she tried to swallow him whole. He reached over and lifted Y/N to steady her against the bookshelf. He separated for a moment to observe her, captivated as her ample chest heaved up and down.

"Kuroo," she whimpered out while clutching his school uniform.

Y/N grabbed his red tie and tugged him closer. Unable to deny her, he slanted his lips over hers.

 Kuroo was honestly so confused; why was she kissing him in a bookstore of all places? Did she have feelings for him? He supposed she had to have felt some attraction. Otherwise, she wouldn't have jumped him in the middle of a conversation. But if she did, when did it began and how? Because as far as he knew, nothing about himself had changed except they were talking more than usual. Their previous conversations included him being flirty and Y/N doing her best to walk away. But now they could spend hours arguing over their shared answers on their organic chemistry homework.

Still, all those questions disappeared when he felt her tongue intertwine with his and suck. Letting out a groan, he pressed her harder against the shelves and bucked. Y/N gasped and grinded back against his clothed cock. Kuroo could feel his member stirring at the soft sounds she was letting out despite gnawing on her lips. She was impatiently trying to rub against him, unable to get a satisfying rhythm.

"Here…here," he urged, grabbing her legs and tugging them around his waist.

She complied and clutched him closer before reigniting their kiss. Y/N was just so impatient and greedy, she coaxed him to get rougher by nibbling on his lower lip.

"Fuck, sweetheart. Do you always get so needy?" he panted.

He needed a minute. Just a minute to get himself together. Because if he made contact with her hot cunt one more time, Kuroo was going to lose it. He was going pull her panties to the side before plunging his hard cock inside of her. And he didn't think getting disciplined for obscenity in a public place was something either of them could afford right now.

SLAM!

The two of them startled and pulled apart to hear a customer apologizing to the bookstore's employee. A book was dropped on the floor.

He reluctantly lowered Y/N back on the floor and let her go. Y/N was looking anywhere but at him, as she tried to fix her appearance and make herself look presentable again.

Kuroo stepped forward. "Let me."

Y/N just nodded as she looked at the floor. He raised her chin to gaze into her eyes as he fixed her long-ruffled strands of hair.

"There. Perfect." His words meaning more than what he implied.

Kuroo waited for her as she paid for her astronomy book and followed her outside.

"Kuroo, it's still early. Do you wanna grab something to eat?" she asked once both had stepped out.

He blinked at her question, wondering if this was a date but decided to not let the chance slip by.

"Sure, I know the perfect place." He grabbed her hand and ignored her flustered pleas to let her hand go.

By the time they arrived at their destination, Kuroo had noticed Y/N had stopped all her protests. Finally, feeling relaxed and secure in his presence.

 ★☆ ★☆

Several months and dates later, Kuroo and Y/N found themselves at his house while studying for an upcoming chemistry exam.

"So, almost all stoichiometry problems can be solved in four simple steps. First, you balance the equation. Convert the units of the given substance to moles. Then calculate the moles of substance yielded by the reaction. Finally, convert the moles of the substance to the desired units. Sounds easy enough, right?" Kuroo asked, looking up from his notes to see Y/N eyeing her worksheet nervously.

"I-I'm going to be honest with you. I have no idea what any of that means," she grumbled.

He grabbed Y/N and pulled her close to him on the bed they were both occupying.

"Here. Watch me do it, and then if you have any questions, let me know."

Kuroo went through the process slowly. When he finished, he looked up to see Y/N gazing at him earnestly with a prominent flush on her face.

He stared back curiously, not understanding why Y/N was peering at him like that. Usually, she gave him those looks when she watched him play volleyball or if he acted particularly sweet that day. He shouldn't have been that surprised when she shoved her worksheet aside and pounced on him.

Y/N desperately clung and kissed him thoroughly.

"W-wait Y/N. We still have work to do," he gasped while turning his face away.

She didn't seem too perturbed and instead started nibbling his slender neck instead.

Hang on, why was he hesitating if there was a willing and rutting girl on top of him?

Kuroo tried to grasp her waist tightly and switch their position. But Y/N was having none of it and pushed his grabby hands away.  She swung her leg over his waist and pushed him down. With her position, her skirt had ridden up and showed off her legs. He couldn't help it as he caressed her silky-smooth skin and started making his way up her skirt. But before he could touch her lacey panties, she once again shoved his hand away.  Y/N carefully steadied herself and started rocking against his jeans.

It didn't take long before his dick started stirring with Y/N grinding on top of him. Trying not to upset Y/N's pace, he carefully unbuttoned her lacey blouse to expose her black bra. Kuroo shoved off the garment off her shoulders so he could knead her breasts through the cotton bra. Perhaps she got impatient from the lack of friction because soon enough, Y/N was unzipping his jeans and pulling out his dick. She pumped it a few times and asked Kuroo to help. While she was getting his dick hard, Kuroo pulled down her panties. She lined up him up quite nicely.

Y/N quickly rammed his cock inside of her, so fast that Kuroo almost missed the pained whimper from her mouth.

"Oy, slow down," he groaned while feeling her walls constrict around him. Kuroo tried to remove himself from her embrace, but she held onto his hips tightly. She started pushing herself up and down on top of him, letting out whimpers at the feeling of being so full.

He could feel her slick building up from the added ministrations and coating his length, making it easier for her to descend on him. Still, it was a tight fit. Bordering on pain and pleasure. He could see the tears in her eyes, so Kuroo once again tried to get her to slow down.

"Sweetheart, we got all the time in the world."

"Tetsu, I.. I need you so badly," she moaned while simultaneously shoving the rest of him inside her.

"Fuck!" he let out after seeing her be filled to the brim and her mound connecting with his pubic.

Y/N was a panting and crying mess, trying to accommodate a cock that was clearly too big for her.

He felt a little ashamed and guilty for liking the way she looked on top of him. But sex with Y/N was always so nasty and filthy. He remembered vividly how desperately she begged for him to take her virginity after school one day. So, Kuroo cut his practice short (the one rare time he did) and took her to the nearest love hotel where he proceeded to fuck her senseless for an hour straight. Still, he remembered feeling despaired afterward because he had wanted to make love after a romantic date for her first time.

His musing got cut short when Y/N started bouncing on his cock mercilessly. She let out choked sobs each time she slammed back down. The bedsprings began squeaking, and the frame of the bed banged against the wall. So much so he would no doubt have to explain about the dent later to his parents.

Soon enough, he could see Y/N becoming tired, her breathing becoming more and more labored.

She begged, "Tetsu, help me."

"I don't know, Y/N. You got yourself in this mess-" Kuroo let out a loud groan when he felt Y/N purposely squeezing his cock.

Kuroo pulled the cups of her bra down to reveal her heaving chest. He sat up on his forearms to thoroughly suck the peaked breasts while keeping one hand on her hips to control the thrusts. The wild bouncing was now replaced with rhythmic rocking. He knew from experience that she liked to stimulate her clit along with penetration. So, each time he entered her, Kuroo held her hips still so he could grind against her more. It worked, her body started shaking and becoming restless from the extra stimulation.

"Tetsu, I-I'm…" she didn't finish her sentence.

"Fuck, I can feel you milking me. Shit, that n-never gets old," he replied, feeling helpless as her orgasm spiraled out of control.

Feeling that the opportunity now was perfect, he quickly reversed their position. Kuroo rammed his cock back inside of her and made sure to rest her ankles on his shoulders. He had to bend a little to make sure his taller height was able to accommodate her. But the position was perfect for deeper penetration, especially when he pressed his chest against the back of her thighs. Y/N was still sensitive from her previous orgasm, so she only got louder and louder from the new angle. He covered her mouth with his hand; however, her muffled sobs were only subdued to a point. Her keening was still audible to anyone who might pass by his room. He let out a grunt when their bodies connected, creating a loud wet slap that only served to turn him on further. No longer able to hold back, Kuroo didn't stop himself from the telltale signs of his own impending pleasure. The base of his cock tightened, and he came inside of her.

He moaned and let Y/N go, settling his face nicely on top of her sweaty and warm chest. Kuroo thanked whatever deity out there that Y/N had been on birth control since their first time. He had the privilege of hitting it raw and hopefully would continue to do so until she said otherwise.

The two laid side by side for a couple of minutes, trying to catch their breaths before he turned on his side and clutched her closer.

Kuroo grabbed Y/N's face and started peppering it with quick kisses, "I love you. I love you so much. You did so good, baby."

Y/N was too tired to participate, so she returned the kisses halfheartedly.

"Not that I mind, babe. But what was that about? I thought we were supposed to be studying," he teased with a smirk.

Y/N shrugged and replied, "I think intelligence is sexy and a turn on."

The smirk on his face crumbled, and he facepalmed.

Y/N frowned at him. "What's wrong?"

"You shouldn't have told me that. Now we will never get any studying done," he replied with a groan.

[rikumorimachisgirl]

Title: Eyes on you

Pairing: Shaw x You

Genre: Fluff

Word count: 2,901

A/N: You (Y/N) are not the MC in MLQC. This is a plunny that's been bugging me for quite a while, I had to write it. I hope you like it.

Disclaimer: I do not own MLQC or its characters, but I do own the concept of this fic.

There were a few mysteries in this world that the esteemed Archeology Graduate Professors at Loveland University can't explain - for instance, the formation of the Stonehenge, the exact location of the lost city of Atlantis, the origin of the Nazca lines… and your presence at the Metro Art Gala dressed to the nines, positively gleaming as you strode arm in arm with your classmate and Thesis partner Shaw, who seemed like the perfect gentleman that evening. Thanks to your work at the Loveland Museum, you scored two invites to the gala featuring the recently discovered works of a well-known artist - an event any Archeology fanatic wouldn't let pass. The two of you walked along with LFG's Exhibition Hall, pausing occasionally to admire one of the recently discovered sculptures by the Renaissance artist D'Romani. As you both looked at the intricacies of the artwork in front of you, your charming companion would lean in slightly and whisper something in your ear, causing you to roll your eyes or stifle a giggle. 

To the guests in the prestigious gala, the two of you looked like two young people at the cusp of falling in love, but the members of the Faculty of the Graduate School of Archeology saw it differently - this was a real-life mystery if they'd seen one. 

As your eyes swiftly swept through the entire room, you could see that your professors only had one question in mind - how'd this happen? How did two people as different as day and night, who argued with each other throughout Graduate studies, end up amiably enjoying each other's company tonight? 

You drew a sharp breath and sighed. The answer was simple: Your Thesis defense was right around the corner. You needed him to cooperate, you were willing to go to great lengths to make it happen. And your Thesis partner (unfortunately) was ready to take full advantage of the situation. 

***

"Tell me why we're doing this again, " you said through the door that separated you and your date, as you were putting on the dress you bought (or invested on, as he casually stated) for tonight's gala, which he insisted on attending with you. It was six in the evening on a Friday, and you had just arrived home after cramming your workload at the Loveland Museum and foregoing your meal breaks just so you could leave work at exactly five-thirty. 

"I already told you a couple of times - you want me to cooperate with you so you can pass our Thesis, and I need a reason to be around her," the purple-haired man waiting at the other side of your bedroom door called out nonchalantly. "You can drop your fantasy about me asking you out because I'm attracted to you."

You hissed silently at his snarky remark and counted to ten. You haven't even left your apartment yet you already wanted this night to be over. "How do you even know she's gonna be there?"

She - the Miracle Finder Producer, the object of your Thesis Partner's fantasies, and as fate would have it, his brother's girlfriend. 

"They're doing a show featuring our Thesis adviser. Didn't he tell us about it during our last consultation?" He asked, his tone dripping with sarcasm.

"I wasn't listening," you shot back, as you took off your ponytail and started styling your hair with your curling iron. You chose a one-shoulder fitted black dress that stops right above your knees, so you thought of wearing your hair down for a change. 

"Ah, yes. You were too busy looking at your notes, trying to prove me wrong as always."

You closed your eyes, as you continued to make big beach waves and prayed to the gods you wouldn't commit murder tonight. 

"How much longer are you gonna take?"

"Excited much?" You asked, smirking while you now removed your glasses and put on your contacts. "You sound like a teenager excited to see his crush in a school fair!"

"Don't compare me to you!" 

"I don't have designs on anyone in the party," you called back. "Unless your brother's attending the event, that is. From what you've been telling me, he seems like a great guy."

Silence. You arched an eyebrow as you strained your ear to listen for any sign of life outside your bedroom door. What must your grunge-rock skater boy-turned-date-for-the-evening be thinking? 

"Do you want to pass our Thesis or not?"

You struck a victory pose at his remark. Finally, one point - you, Shaw - about twenty. 

"Are you done yet? This suit is really uncomfortable. Damn, why do people even wear these?"

"Because they're decent?" You shot back. "You know, you can always go home if you're not comfortable in your attire because when we get there, you need to act decent, too. Can't have your usual swagger in a formal affair."

"Just hurry it up already!"

You rolled your eyes as you applied your nude-colored lipstick to finish off your look before putting on your black stilettos, and stuffing your phone, wallet, and your makeup in your purse. 

"All done," you replied, as you finally emerged from your room. 

***

A part of you wished that the dynamics between you and Shaw were different. While he was a pain in the neck, and too carefree for his own good, you also thought he made for a good intellectual sparring partner, quite attractive, and it was hard to deny that he's got your heart beating double-time whenever he got too close for comfort like he was at that very moment. 

"My, you two kids seem to be having fun tonight."

You gasped, at the sound of the voice behind you, and you felt your date nudge you ever-so-subtly while straightening.

"Hey, Professor Adler," he said in his usual unruffled tone, his lips stretched into a smirk as he held his hand out to your Anthropology professor and Thesis adviser, who watched you both amusedly. His gesture made your eyes shot wide open, you thought they'd fall right off. Shaw shaking someone's hand? That's one for the books. 

"Shaw. Fancy seeing you here," the stout middle-aged man greeted while shaking your date's hand. "This isn't your usual scene though."

"Yeah, I know, but I can't exactly turn a pretty lady down, can I?" 

"I can see that," your professor said as he looked at you appraisingly. "Well, well, you clean up well, Miss (y/n)."

You fought the urge to squirm at the older man's words when you heard your date cluck his cheeks with his tongue and suddenly felt his arm around your shoulders, pressing you protectively close to his side. 

***

"All done!" You happily announced as you stepped into the living room of your small apartment where your date was impatiently waiting for you. 

You could've sworn he was stunned for a second or two before he shook his head and tried to regain his usual impassive expression. Finally, he stood and walked closer to assess you better. 

"You're not wearing your glasses. I thought you said you're practically blind without them?" 

You cocked your head to one side. Out of all the things he could've complimented or called out, that's the first thing he noticed? 

"Wouldn't it look awkward if I wore glasses to a formal event?"

"Your hair is all curly," he continued as if you didn't say anything. "And your shoes are so tall, won't you trip? Also, surely you have a jacket to go with that dress, right?" 

You stared at him in disbelief. Why did this carefree, bass-playing skater boy turn into your dad all of a sudden? 

"Uh…"

"Well, at least you're not wearing red lipstick. You don't have to try too hard to look sexy. Geez! I've got plans of my own this evening, so don't expect me to be your bodyguard," he continued to mumble as he circled around you. Before long, you felt something warm and heavy on your shoulder. His coat?

"It's just until we get to the venue," he shrugged as he led you to the car he borrowed for tonight. "I don't want people seeing you freeze to death."

You sighed, your shoulders slumped as you followed your date to the car. You already expected he wouldn't throw you a compliment for looking like a proper human tonight, and you cursed yourself for feeling gutted over it anyway. 

 ***

"So, which one of these sculptures did you like best, Professor?" You sighed in relief as Shaw changed the subject, his arm still wrapped around you, making you blush furiously. 

"Oh, I have to say I liked Eros and Psyche best. In case you haven't seen it yet, it's located a little further down the hall near the bar area," the older man was starting to explain when someone tapped his shoulder from behind. 

"Excuse me, Professor Adler," a gentle voice called out, making both the professor and Shaw jump. From behind the old man, a pretty petite with brown hair and big brown eyes, and the biggest smile on her face stepped up. "My name is MC from Miracle Finder."

Almost immediately, Shaw withdrew his arm around you, almost causing you to stagger backward. He straightened up and feigned disinterest. 

"Hey. It's a little rude how you stepped in while I was talking to the Professor," he said, his tone teasing. 

"Oh, I didn't notice you here. Do you mind if I talk to your Professor? We've invited him for an interview about the exhibit," the girl said sweetly. 

Based on how unconsciously coy she acted around Shaw, and the way he kept egging her, there was no doubt that this was the girl he was crushing on. You felt like the odd person out all of a sudden and needed to step away. 

You backed away slowly, careful not to rouse their attention because it would probably suck if you knew how Shaw would introduce you to his little crush. As soon as you were in a safe distance, you turned and walked aimlessly down the hall, pausing briefly at paintings or sculptures that caught your fancy, looking at its intricacies as you did so earlier. But somehow, it wasn't as fun as it was before, so you moved on quickly, to give way to the other guests who also wanted to view the artwork.

Finally, you came upon the bar and decided to rest your tired feet at the far corner, hidden from the rest of the world. Sighing, you slipped your feet off your stilettos and quietly watched as the guests around you - mostly couples - happily chatting away as they enjoyed the beauty of the art around them and the wonderful music that filled the air. You knew somewhere in the crowd, your date was fawning over his lady love, probably getting in the way of her filming your professor. 

Tch. 

You knew he liked her - he always told you he did. And why wouldn't he? MC was pretty, seemingly sweet, and dainty - the kind of girl any guy would like to protect. And you. You were the opposite. You lived for your work, were 'one of the boys', and didn't need anyone to protect you - that's just how you were - and now you started to realize that maybe guys don't exactly like that. At least not Shaw. 

Wait, what were you thinking? You scolded yourself as you shook your head. Why were you even thinking of what he liked when you don't even like him to start with. Or did you? 

"Ugh. What the hell is wrong with me?" You groaned when a cold bottle of beer and a frozen glass was placed in front of you. 

"I was gonna ask you that myself." 

You straightened up in your seat and shot a look at the guy seated beside you. Dressed in a nice grey suit, he smiled as he raised his beer bottle in front of you. 

"You look like you needed a drink. I hope the beer is okay. They don't have fruit beer or soda," he said calmly, his amber-colored eyes never leaving yours. 

"Y-yeah. Beer is perfect," you replied while pouring the amber liquid into the glass. "Thanks," you muttered before raising the glass to your lips to gulp down some liquid courage. 

"I saw you with Shaw earlier -"

The name on his lips drove you to a coughing fit, as you choked on your drink. "Sorry, " you mumbled in between coughs. 

"No, I'm sorry," the brown-haired guy said, as he cautiously and politely patted your back. "I didn't mean to bring that up. I was just curious."

"It's fine," you replied when you finally regained your composure. "Yes, we're just classmates in Grad school who decided to check this exhibit out for the heck of it."

"Classmates, huh?"

"Yeah, that's what we are," you said, taking a sip off your glass. "Grad school classmates."

"Are you telling me or telling yourself?"

You looked up and saw him smiling. There was something about Dreamy McHandsome who was seated beside you that felt so familiar yet different at the same time, but you couldn't point a finger at what it was exactly. 

"We're classmates, and we're working on our thesis together. But we're not friends - far from it even. We hate each other's guts."

"Can't blame you for doing so," he shrugged as he drank his beer. 

"Yeah. He dragged me here so he can get with someone he's been crushing on for so long," you rambled on, frowning. 

"Oh? And who might that be?"

"The Miracle Finder Producer. You know, the pretty girl in a blue top and white skirt. He's been going on and on about her for weeks…"

"You mean my girlfriend?" 

His girlfriend. You choked on your drink once again. "Y-y-your girlfriend? You mean to say…" You gasped. Has the beer made you stupid? You've barely drunk half of it, you thought as you fought to regain your dignity. This was Shaw's brother you were talking to - and boy, we're they blessed with good genes…

… And the same social awkwardness, you noticed, judging by how he kept his hand at your back, but not exactly touching it, as if trying to assess if he had to pat you or not. 

When you finally calmed down, he cleared his throat and gave you a small smile. "Don't worry. She talks to me about their conversations. I know what that guy is playing at, and I most definitely know he's not after my girl," he said, his voice broke no room for doubt. "My name is Gavin..."

"Yeah, I know…"

"You - what?"

"Oh," you said, tapping on your glass nervously. "Shaw kinda mentioned it in passing before."

"I see."

"So, what were you saying earlier about Shaw?"

"Oh. From what my girlfriend tells me, he's got his sights set on…"

"Ahem," you heard someone say loud enough for you and Gavin to turn your heads around. And there, standing behind you, was an angry-looking Shaw. You sat up, your gaze shifting between the two brothers as the air started to thicken with tension. "I talk to someone for a minute and the next thing I knew, my date walks out on me and right into the one person I'd hate for her to meet."

"Well, if you were just honest with her as with a lot of other things in your life, maybe she wouldn't have left your side earlier," Gavin retorted flippantly. "Is she finally done with filming?"

Shaw simply grunted in reply as he watched his older brother finish his bottle of beer and stand. "Well, Miss, there's a lot I've heard about you. Seems somebody couldn't stop talking about you, but I'll leave it at that." 

With a wink and a mischievous smile upon his face, the brown-haired guy sauntered off to look for his better half, as you and Shaw watched in awkward silence. 

He cleared his throat and glanced at you. "Hey."

"Hey," you replied, shakily. 

"So, about what that jerk said -"

"Yes?" You asked, feeling your heart hammer against your chest by the second.

"Whatever he said is not true," he said dismissively, as he took his coat off and draped it over your shoulders. "I told you before, I don't find you the least bit attractive."

You felt tears starting to sting your eyes, as he continued with his harsh commentary. "You're tough, highly opinionated, and you always want to come out on top. I don't find those attractive at all," he said. "I prefer a damsel in distress. I want someone clingy… someone, needy."

"I know that -"

"Oh do you?" He teased, his amber eyes twinkling. "You seem to know a lot about me."

"We've been working together for months now," you said. "Of course, I'd know more about you."

"I see," he said, as he took a step closer to you and touched your cheek, rubbing the stray tear that had managed to slip down the side of your face. "So, you must know I'm also a good liar. After all, I've kept all these feelings to myself for quite some time."

He snickered when he saw your frown deepen and he bent down just as he had done so earlier, to whisper. "I made you think I liked someone else when in fact," his low voice made you shiver. "I've always eyes for you."

The End.

[ryllhaven]

Good Health and Nursing as a Profession

People commonly say: "Live life to the fullest!"

However, behind those same words, you'd find someone who doesn't care about their physical or mental wellbeing. They also say, "Have fun since life is short," yet they spend their days indoors doing nothing as enjoyable or useful as the activities done outside, resulting in a lifestyle that is causing people to live shorter lives. Ironic isn't it?

So, let me remind stop hiding from behind those statements and put them into action! Say you're enjoying life to the fullest when you actually aren't, since it's clear that sitting on your sofa isn't experiencing life to its greatest extent. Yes, I understand that technology is progressing and that television is just as exciting as anything else, but what else are you getting out of this but entertainment?

Maintaining good health is essential, that's all I'm trying to say. It's the key to a much longer and fulfilling life, since that's what we all want don't we?

.Picture from: Fabulous Magazine

PHYSICAL HEALTH

We've all accumulated some sort of disease in our lives. It could have simply been the flu or unfortunately something greater than that, but the point here is that your body's physical status is a reflection of how you're taking care of it!

Gentle Reminder: I'm simply promoting good physical (and mental) health! Encountering someone who does not appear to be physically or psychologically healthy, gives you no right to humiliate them. Please show some compassion and respect, thank you!

Physical health refers to the state of being healthy, free of sickness or abnormalities, and in a state of optimum well-being. It occurs when the body is doing as it was supposed! Good physical health comes with a list of important upkeep activities: Regular exercise, a well-balanced diet, enough sleep, and a reduction in smoking, drinking, and drug usage are all recommended.

I know. I know. But as exhausting as it sounds, you'll see that it's all worth the sweat and effort once you'll realize how fortunate you are to be healthy and fit as not many can be.

Here's my personal exercise plan! I made sure it was as practical and as realistic, which meant that the duration, intensity, and frequency of the stated exercises we're according to my ability to perform them. I suggest you make your very own exercise plan that'll suit you and your body or you can follow mine of course. Along side this, you can always include a proper and balanced diet and you'll see results in no time!

MENTAL HEALTH

Life is a roller coaster of emotions. You are occasionally confronted with events that have a significant impact on your thinking as an emotional and intellectual being. Some people may not realize how essential mental health is, and as a result, they disregard this aspect of their lives. I've heard MANY opinionated individuals voice things along the lines of, "Depression isn't a real thing, it's just all in your head" or say "Come on, things could be worse". I don't know about you, but I think this is really insensitive of someone to say, and I encourage you to never say anything like this to people dealing with mental illness!

If you're someone going through mental issues and you're reading this right now, I want you to know that YOU'RE HEARD. I hear your cry for suffering and I'm proud that you're here! I really am!

For the people at the back who want to know how to help out, the only way to do so is to be there for them, show them that you care by listening, and be sensitive with your words! You don't know what they're going through which is enough reason for you not to judge and think so lowly of them.

Both mental and physical aspects of ourselves are significant. None of the two stand greater than the other so let's all try to value our lives by taking care of our well-being. As a soon-to-be registered nurse, I'll take up the obligation of nurturing for you someday just in case you can't do it for yourself :) Kudos to all the nurses and doctors (all medical professionals in general) out there who are striving to serve you all for the healing and development of our bodies and minds despite this pandemic.

Let's stay healthy people! You'll thank me for reminding you this someday.

[tnffc]

"You're avoiding me, right?" with Stargent? If you don't like that ship then Steter or really anything!

I like! I definitely like the ship. Buuut I don’t have any experience writing them so pls be kind with this first attempt at them. Thank you for challenging me, I like trying new things, I just often need a motivation to do so.

Also, I wrote this instead of sleeping so there is that…

I hope you still enjoy it :)

___________________________________

Someone cleared their throat next to Stiles.

He ignored it and tried to continue reading his book, if the person had a problem they would have to voice it properly.

The person, from the sound of it a guy, cleared his throat again and Stiles barely managed not to roll his eyes but decided not to be difficult today.

At least not very.

“In need of a cough drop?” he asked, still not looking up.

“I’d actually prefer a conversation with you.”

Stiles recognized the voice and flailed his arms around, dropping his book and halfway jumping out of the chair he had been sitting in.

“WHAT…the fuck dude?!”

He had yelped the first word and then hissed the rest, trying to lower his voice and not disturb the other visitors in the public library.

Chris Argent, good looking as the devil in a grey shirt, black leather jacket, tight jeans and worn out boots picked up the book Stiles had dropped, handed it back to him and then looked at him expectantly, waiting for an answer.

Stiles took the book reluctantly.

There were many things he did not feel like doing right now, one very high up on his list was talking to Chris Argent. Or doing anything in general with the guy.

His lips felt dry at the thought of speaking with him.

Getting his brain to desex his thoughts when it came to Chris was hard enough as it was.

He didn’t need the real life version making it even harder.

He’d actually prefer for Chris to keep from making anything hard for him.

Because all that could result in was a lot of awkwardness and embarrassment.

He licked his lips and tried to say something.

His throat was dry too and he had to swallow twice.

“Is there some kind of way for me to not do that?”

Chris stared down at him for a moment like he was actually contemplating the question before answering dry as the desert.

“No.”

Well, great then…unless he felt like magically blasting the guy in public Stiles could hardly do anything to get out of this situation.

Physically he had not the slightest chance.

And not only because this was Chris Fucking Argent, trained as a soldier since childhood to fight opponents with superhuman strength and speed.

But also because being close to Chris, breathing in his scent, feeling his warm, strong hands on his shoulder or arm, hearing his smooth, deep voice and seeing his everything was overwhelming.

Ever since that unfortunate encounter Stiles could not undo the realisation of what a dream Chris Argent was.

It was frankly also embarrassing how long it had taken him to realize it in the first place.

Begrudgingly Stiles nodded “Okay then, I guess. You wanna do this right here?”

Chris shook his head slightly.

“I’ll buy you a coffee, I don’t want to disturb the other visitors.”

That was reasonable.

Under any other circumstances Stiles would probably have felt joy about being treated to a coffee.

Right now he mainly felt like a vaguely humanoid shaped bag of ants.

But he nodded again and let Chris take the lead.

The short walk to the closest Café was entirely silent and Stiles was purposefully trying to not think too much about what the upcoming conversation might be like.

He simply tried to remind himself to hope for the best, whatever that was and be prepared for the worst - probably embarrassment and ridicule.

They sat down in a corner as far away from the few other customers as possible.

Chris sat down first, in the spot with the best overview of the room and every door.

Stiles could sit across from Chris, having most of the room in his back, which would make him even more uncomfortable, or sit with the other wall of their corner booth in his back. Which meant there was little more than a table corner separating him from the hunter.

He decided having a wall in his back would help more with his nervosity than being close to Chris would fuel it.

The waitress came almost right away and both of them ordered coffee, black, no cream, no sugar.

Usually Stiles wasn’t one to go for that, but he didn’t feel like ordering something more elaborate, his mind was otherwise occupied.

“So…” Chris started when the young lady had left their table.

He was leaned forward, hands lying on the table, folded and giving him the impression of resolve and calm.

“You’re avoiding me, right?”

Stiles blinked and then looked down at Chris’ hands.

Not even now he could entirely shake the thoughts of what those hands could do to him.

He swallowed and nodded again before croaking “Yeah…”

Chris leaned back at that, crossing his arms.

“Do you have a problem with men having s-”

“It’s not the gay part. Jesus, I’m so straight I could pass the food industry’s beauty standards for bananas, okay?”

He saw the guy raise his eyebrows at the interruption, then tilt his head, apparently contemplating something.

Stiles wasn’t sure if he should say something else but then Chris was already speaking again.

He was clearly determined to get to the bottom of this.

“Admittedly it’d have been weird for you to be in a gay club if you had an issue with it. Ok, so you saw me fuck a guy in a club’s darkroom. What’s the problem? The fact you didn’t expect me to be interested in men? The fact your best friend is my son in law? Are you just generally uncomfortable with sex? Or nudity? I would really like to put this past us.”

Shit, shit, shit, shit!

Usually Stiles was a great liar. He was good enough by now to even fool most of the werewolves. Admittedly, Boyd and Peter could still sometimes pick up on it but he was working on that.

But right now, right here?

Anything fake he might try to say to get Chris off his track would probably not work.

He just didn’t have enough control over his body at the moment.

As if Chris had read Stiles’ thoughts - he had probably read Stiles body language instead - he reached out and took Stiles hand to place index and middle finger over his wrist, feeling his pulse.

“Tell me Stiles.”

God, that fucking voice!

How was such a simple order giving him goosebumps and making his heart beat in his head?

He tried to control his shallow breathing so it’d not turn into a panting or anything.

Should he really say it?

If he did, this conversation would probably end real quick.

At least then it’d be over, even if Chris might be the one avoiding him then.

He licked his lips and opened his mouth but couldn’t get out a tone.

He closed his mouth again and closed his eyes, breathing in deeply and calmly, organizing his thoughts.

With more determination he opened his eyes again.

Okay, he would say it.

“All right. But just know this probably won’t help making things less weird between us.”

Chris kept his serious, inquisitive expression.

“I’ll take that risk.”

“Okay….” Stiles took another deep breath and looked at Chris’ hand around his wrist while speaking.

“Before I saw you in the club all you were to me was Allison’s dad, a parent of a friend of mine. Well and a scarily skillful hunter who can hold his own in any comfrontation, no matter if physically or intellectually…so in a way a person I might have been equally intimidated, impressed and inspired by. A person I might see as a role model even.”

He licked his lips, why did they already feel so dry again?

Should he really continue?

Looking up was a mistake, because now he could not pull himself away from Chris’ intense gaze.

He started worrying his bottom lip without even registering it really.

Chris squeezed Stiles’ wrist.

“And after you saw me?”

His expression seemed a lot more vulnerable and open than moments ago.

Maybe Stiles’ words had brought down Chris’ wards a little.

Stiles wasn’t sure if he was imagining things but he felt like there was serious worry hidden underneath curiosity and confusion.

He continued.

“Afterwards…I saw you as a….a man for the first time.

Something about seeing you have sex totally pulled you out of all those former definitions in my worldview.

So far people I have known one way haven’t changed their place in my life.

Well, my love for Lydia might have changed from adolescent desire to platonic admiration and appreciation but…I would never really think of Scott as a sexual person. And the same goes for Allison, Melissa or Parrish…they’re registered as people I have absolutely no sexual thoughts towards. I am aware they have sex lives but like…that’s already more than I need to know…”

Chris nodded slowly.

“So you’re uncomfortably aware of me being a sexually active person now because before you saw me mainly as a parental figure in your life.”

Stiles brushed his hair back with his free hand.

“Y…yeah?”

Chris raised his brows at that.

“That was a lie…what aren’t you telling me Stiles.”

Fucking hell!

Fuck this! Fuck Chris!

“Shit…okay, look…I’m less uncomfortably aware and more uncomfortably turned on by it, okay? There you have it. I never before thought of you as fuckable or dateable. Not because you aren’t pretty damn smoking hot - I can barely understand how that didn’t register to me before - but because you were really really firmly placed in a social box labeled ‘parents’.”

He was finally able to look away from Chris face and stared down on the table.

There was his coffee.

He hadn’t even noticed the waitress bringing it over.

But there it was, black and still steaming a little.

He felt like ingesting anything right now would turn his stomach inside out.

He heard Chris’ voice next to him and was surprised at the slight amusement in its tone.

“I think the same might be happening to me right this moment.”

Stiles looked up in confusion and was caught off guard by the heat in the man’s open stare.

“Wha-uh…what?”

Chris let go of Stiles’ hand and rubbed his neck with a guilty, reluctant smile.

“I did not expect that to be your answer Stiles. I mean…you are right, you are a friend of my daughter. I would have never looked at you and seen a person whose sex life would be of any concern or interest to me…I suppose we are both a little guilty of putting the other in a box we might not really fit in anymore.”

It was Stiles turn to tilt his head with an inquisitive expression.

“Is this going where I think it is going, Chris?”

Chris’ mouth twitched into something similar to a smirk for a moment before he answered, looking close to serious, but not quite.

“I don’t know Stiles…but I might have an answer for you when you tell me in what kind of situation you think of me as a sexually active person.”

The corners of Stiles’ mouth twitched as well.

“Are you asking if I ever jerked off to the memory of you pounding that guy against the fucking wall?”

Something in Chris’ eyes lit up at that question and Stiles could feel Chris press their knees against each other under the table.

“Yes.”

A weird mix of excitement and fear washed over Stiles.

Was he really actively flirting with Chris Argent?

Was Chris Motherfucking Argent actively flirting with him?

Apparently.

“Well in that case; Yes. I’ve not been able to picture much else lately. I might have had a few daydreams in which it was me you’re fucking.”

Chris made a noise that seemed like a half choked groan.

“I should have known you’d be good at talking about filthy things. I’d have so much fun getting you to that headspace where you’re beyond language.”

At that Stiles had to full on grin.

“I think nobody ever told me so roundabout they’d love to get me to shut up.”

Chris flashed a grin back.

“Oh no Stiles, I’d want you to be vocal, don’t worry.”

They shared a silent moment so filled with sexual tension it had to be palpable.

Then Stiles inhaled and exhaled a deep, shaky breath.

“Okay so…your place?”

Chris took a breath as well and nodded.

“Sounds good.”